Monday Night Raw
Date: July 4, 2005
Location: ARCO Arena, Sacramento, California
Attendance: 10,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Jonathan Coachman

We’ll start the second half of the year with this one and that could mean a few things. We’re likely in for a bigger show due to the holiday, but I’m not sure how much effort there is going to be for a show where they know no one is watching. The Draft is over as well so this is your roster for the time being. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Tonight: Carlito’s Cabana with Hulk Hogan.

Opening sequence.

Cue Kurt Angle to say he doesn’t approve of fans praising Shawn Michaels and Ric Flair (in a recent poll) more than him. He made Shawn tap at Wrestlemania, just like he made Hogan tap the last time they faced each other. Now he wants to make Brooke tap, meaning he gets punched as well. The double teaming is on but Shawn runs in for the save. A tag match seems imminent.

Post break, Shawn is in Eric Bischoff’s office to yell about what just happened.

Edge/Snitsky vs. Kane/Big Show

Kane throws Edge into the corner and hammers away to start so it’s off to Snitsky, with Edge getting in a cheap shot to take over. That lasts all of a half second as Show comes in and whips Snitsky all over the place. The threat of a chokeslam sends Edge bailing to the floor and Kane chases Lita to the back as we take a break.

Back with Snitsky working on Show’s leg until the other leg to the face breaks it up in a hurry. It’s not enough for a tag though as Edge gets in another shot to the leg, allowing Snitsky to yell a lot. A double middle rope shoulder gets two on Show with Edge’s eyes bugging out. Show is right back with a double suplex and the hot tag brings in Kane. House is cleaned with the side slam on Snitsky and Edge headbutting Edge from the apron. Back to back corner splashes set up the chokeslam to Snitsky for the pin.

Rating: D+. Just a tag match here with Lita being taken away so Edge couldn’t cheat to win as easily. Show probably should have gotten the pin to establish himself a bit more here but it’s not like it matters all that much. Snitsky’s push has come to a grinding halt, but it’s not like it was any secret that it was coming sooner rather than later.

Shawn comes out of Bischoff’s office and the tag match is official for later.

Here are the Heart Throbs to hit on Lilian, who needs some comfort after Viscera dumped her at Vengeance. They’ll make Viscera scream no no no and if Lilian likes what she sees, she can scream low low low.

Viscera vs. Heart Throbs

Lilian cries through Viscera’s entrance. The Throbs get thrown into the corner to start but mange a double shoulder to put Viscera down. Stomping in the corner sets up a crotching against the post….and that’s a DQ to give Viscera the pin.

There has been an eleven person trade between Raw and Smackdown. Chavo Guerrero is now on Raw, who is now bald and has a sweater wrapped around his shoulders. He hasn’t been all that successful and it’s because he’s Hispanic. Therefore, he has renounced his Hispanic heritage and is now Kerwin….White. Oh and Maria is stupid.

Here is the trade:

To Raw

Mark Jindrak

Rene Dupree

Danny Basham

Kenzo Suzuki

Hiroko

Chavo Guerrero

To Smackdown

William Regal

Candice Michelle

Sylvain Grenier

Simon Dean

Steven Richards

The Hurricane, Rosey and Stacy demonstrate how to put out sparklers with Rosey being lit on fire.

John Cena tells Maria to not worry about what someone named Kerwin thinks about her. Cena hits on her a bit and Maria smiles a lot.

Here’s Chris Jericho for the Highlight Reel. He wanted to have a special guest just like Carlito so he has a big music star of his own. That would be John Cena himself and he is very happy to be here. Jericho: “JOHN JOHN JOHN!” Cena: “CHRIS CHRIS CHRIS!” Cena is on a roll right now as WWE Champion and he even has a concert coming up in Philadelphia. Jericho on the other hand was the first Undisputed Champion and has played hundreds of concerts, including at the Download Festival in England. And yes, he does have a clip!

Cena isn’t impressed, so Jericho lists off the bands he played with at the festival. That’s still not enough, so Jericho gets in his face to talk about his legendary status. Jericho says he could take the title from Cena whenever he wanted so Cena gets fired up. The people aren’t stupid because everyone remembers when Raw Was Jericho. Now though, Jericho Is Cheap. Jericho has taken everything he’s done and covered it in cheap sauce. The fight is on with Cena getting the better of it until referees break it up. Cena was showing the fire here and you can see it in his eyes more and more every week.

With the good stuff out of the way, it’s time for Sgt. Slaughter’s Bikini Boot Camp obstacle course for the Diva Search girls. Coach and Christy Hemme are the hosts and bring out Slaughter, followed by the women. We go over the course, which includes jumping jacks, a potato sack, a jump rope and more. The winner gets immunity from being eliminated. Coach demonstrates and gets a time of 48 seconds. The women all go, Leyla falls out of her top and is disqualified, JR and King list off factoids about each, and Elizabeth wins. This ate up over fifteen minutes.

We recap the opening segment.

And now we’re back to the women to see how to vote for them.

Rene Dupree vs. Val Venis

Dupree is announced as part of the BLOCKBUSTER TRADE and promises to prove that he is the greatest specimen to ever set foot in the ring. Venis starts fast with the running knees to the ribs but Dupree pounds him down. A knee lift and backdrop have Dupree in some trouble, only to have him come back with a rollup with feet on the ropes for a fast pin. This was nothing.

Smackdown Rebound.

Angle and Carlito think it would be cool to hurt Shawn and Hogan.

Carlito/Kurt Angle vs. Hulk Hogan/Shawn Michaels

Hogan shoves Carlito away to start so Angle comes in and gets shoved down as well. It’s off to Shawn to work on the arm with an ax handle into an armdrag. The villains switch off again and it’s Shawn armbarring Carlito for a change. Angle comes in again and gets chopped in the corner and everything breaks down for a bit. Shawn and Hogan clear the ring and even dust off their hands as we take a break.

Back with Carlito kneeing Shawn in the back so Angle can hit the overhead belly to belly. Another suplex gives Angle two but Shawn fights out of the chinlock. The dropkick misses but Shawn is fine enough to counter the Angle Slam into a DDT. That’s enough for the hot tag to Hogan and the big boot drops Carlito. A backdrop puts Angle on the floor and it’s the legdrop for the pin.

Rating: C. Totally standard Hogan tag match here and there’s nothing wrong with going that way. It’s the best thing he could do at this point and he still does it well enough. That being said, it was a rather standard and uninteresting match, though Hogan’s comeback will never not work for me. I’m split on Carlito taking the fall as he’s the Intercontinental Champion, but he’s also by far the weakest of the people involved.

Post match a lot of posing ensues….until Shawn superkicks Hogan. The place goes QUIET on that one before some Hogan chants pop up. Shawn stares down at Hogan and the fans aren’t sure what to do as Shawn leaves to end the show. So that worked, and you can pick a few different motivations for Shawn.

Overall Rating: C-. The Cena vs. Jericho and Shawn turn stuff was awesome but the rest of the show was a mixture of bad wrestling and the eternally long Diva Search nonsense. It got more time than any match and while I get the point, it is one of the most annoying things I can ever remember WWE doing. The two big things carried it, but the rest of the show is pretty terrible.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Dynamite
Date: November 27, 2019
Location: Sears Center Arena, Chicago, Illinois
Commentators: Excalibur, Jim Ross

It’s back where things got started with a return to Chicago. As luck would have it, we are in for a big show here with the World Title being defended as champion Chris Jericho faces Scorpio Sky in an unlikely title defense. That could make for a heck of a match and hopefully the rest of the show backs it up. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with Chris Jericho’s Thank You celebration, complete with people in rather large costumes, a marching band, large presents and MIKE JONES (Virgil) as emcee. Jericho, sounding rather distorted, talks about how much he has earned this thank you, but he has a thank you for the fans too. Some of the people in this arena have coupons underneath their seats for FIFTY CENTS off the new Le Champion shirt.

Jericho has also found some grapes from the mountains of Nepal and we now have official Little Bit Of The Bubbly champagne available. With a toast out of the way, Jericho brings out the Inner Circle for the celebration. Sammy Guevara has a present for Jericho: a cardboard cutout of the two of them hugging. Santana and Ortiz have a gift basket, including some Vaporub, a photo of someone whose name I couldn’t understand, some flip flops (Ortiz: “These double as a weapon.”), a little bit of the 40 (in a brown paper bag), and a Puerto Rico bandanna.

Cue Jake Hager with a goat named Chris Jerigoat. Now it’s time for the BIG surprise (it’s in a big box) which is…..Jericho’s dad, Ted Irvine! Ted talks about beating the Chicago Blackhawks all of the time and busts out some custom New York Rangers jerseys for the Inner Circle.

Jericho has a letter from AEW but since he isn’t in the mood to read, Justin Roberts can come do it for him. The statement is a nice proclamation about Jericho as World Champion but Jericho didn’t like Roberts’ tone. The beatdown is on but the marching band, which happens to be SCU, comes in for the save and beat down Virgil. This was a bit long, but the gifts were funny and Jericho can sell anything.

Best Friends vs. Lucha Bros

Orange Cassidy, in a turkey suit, is here with the Best Friends. The Bros jump them in the aisle so Cassidy dives onto the Bros, giving us a WKRP In Cincinnati references from JR (look it up). The Friends fight back in a hurry and we get the hug out of the way early on. A few cheap shots behind the referee’s back let Pentagon superkick Trent down for two. Back from a break with Trent still in trouble and a top rope double stomp, which looked rather low, gets two more.

Trent fights up and gets over for the tag to Chuck, who grabs a half crab of all things. That’s broken up with a quick superkick but Trent is right back with a running flip dive to the floor. Pentagon’s Canadian Destroyer gets two and it’s Fenix hitting his springboard kick to Trent. The rolling cutter is countered into the Crunchie for the pin on Fenix at 7:54.

Rating: C. The Friends looked good here, though I’m not sure how much sense it makes to have the Lucha Bros lose, especially after Pentagon lost the previous night. I can appreciate them building up a team like the Best Friends though, even if they’re not a team I care for all that much. I’m not sure I can picture them against SCU, but someone has to face the champs.

Here are the women’s rankings. Before the next match, we hear guest commentator Marco Martinez thanking JR and Excalibur in a statement I don’t think was supposed to make air.

Emi Sakura/Bea Priestly vs. Kris Stadtlander/Hikaru Shida

JR during Sakura’s entrance: “Freddy Mercury never looked so Oriental.” It’s a brawl to start with Stadtlander sending both of them to the floor. Shida loads up her dive off the chair so Sakura sits in it, only to be knocked out of it in a hurry. The dive hits and we take a break.

Back with Shida in trouble and Sakura grabbing an abdominal stretch, complete with her mic stand to continue the Mercury tribute. Sakura gets sent into Priestly in the corner though and an enziguri knocks Priestly sillier. She’s fine enough to grab a German suplex so Shida hits a running knee and makes the hot tag to Stadtlander. A pumphandle rollup gives Stadtlander two on Sakura but a rolling cutter takes her down.

Priestly hits a top rope double stomp to the back for two but Stadtlander avoids the moonsault. A running knee sets up a superkick to the back of Sakura’s head and an ax kick gives Stadtlander two (in a very near fall). Priestly gets in a cheap shot from behind though and Sakura grabs la majistral to finish Stadtlander at 9:33.

Rating: C. This felt sloppy in a lot of places with the fans not being happy with the ending. Shida is losing me in a hurry with the same knee strikes in every match. It’s still better than the Mercury thing, which is one of the more out there tributes that Sakura does every week. Are we really hoping to cater to the Mercury/wrestling fan crossover audience? Not the worst match, but it wasn’t exactly a tight effort.

Cody vs. Matt Knicks

Post match Cody calls out MJF but a masked man comes out from a hole in the ring. Excalibur: “IT’S THE BLADE!” Another man comes out, with Excalibur calling him the Butcher. Excalibur: “We have not seen them before!” They pull Allie, now going by the Bunny, out of the hole. JR was as confused as I am about who those two are, but Excalibur knows and that’s all that matters.

Pac vs. Kenny Omega

Omega starts fast with a snapdragon and sends him to the floor for the big dive. Pac gets in a kick to the ribs but it’s another snapdragon to put him back down. The suplex off the apron doesn’t work as Omega gets knocked to the floor with Pac nailing a moonsault as we take a break.

Back with Omega striking away in the corner and hitting another suplex. Omega goes up though and gets caught in a super Falcon Arrow for two. The Black Arrow is loaded up as JR congratulates Excalibur for getting in the Bowling Shoe Ugly line. Omega rolls away to make Pac crash and there’s the V Trigger to set up the One Winged Angel. That’s reversed as well so Omega rolls him into a crucifix for the pin at 12:04.

Rating: B-. This felt like the structure of a Pac vs. Omega match but it needed another eight to ten minutes to really make it work. What we got was good enough though and Omega won clean to continue his road to redemption. Pac losing again so soon after the loss to Page is a bit questionable, but so is having this many big matches so soon after the show debuted.

We look back at the end of last week’s battle royal.

Dynamite Diamond: Adam Page vs. Maxwell Jacob Friedman

MJF, with Wardlow, says he is the only one who deserves the diamond. Page says he isn’t a ring guy but he’d be glad to win this. It’s a brawl to start with Page sending him to the floor and over the barricade as we take an early break. Back with Page hitting a moonsault to the floor, followed by the Buckshot lariat for two with Wardlow putting the foot on the rope. Wardlow gets in a shot of his own and the Cross Rhodes gives MJF the pin and the ring at 6:58.

Rating: D+. What we got was decent but Page losing another match isn’t helping him, though it’s hardly some career killer as it wasn’t even a clean loss. MJF getting the big win here is great though as he is the kind of guy who needs to be pushed as hard as they can. He’s the best heel in the company if not all of wrestling at the moment so giving him a win like this works well.

Post match here’s Diamond Dallas Page to present the ring. Page hands him the ring but isn’t happy with some of MJF’s recent actions. That means a hard slap on the shoulder but Page is willing to be the bigger man and offers a handshake. MJF puts his gum in the hand instead and gets pulled back, only to have Wardlow get in Page’s face. Agents and referees break it up in a hurry as I can’t believe they didn’t reference Page’s Lord Of The Ring from WCW.

Here’s Dustin Rhodes to say he’s out for Jake Hager’s blood. Cue the Inner Circle to go after Dustin though, drawing out the Young Bucks for the save. Triple Shattered Dreams leave the Circle laying.

We get another Join The Dark Order vignette, featuring various people flashing back to what drove them here. Anyone could be Dark Order, and they are all better now that they are part of the group.

AEW World Title: Chris Jericho vs. Scorpio Sky

Jericho is defending and seconds are banned from ringside. They take their time to start with Jericho shouldering him down but getting sent outside for his efforts. Sky hits a running boot to the face and a jumping elbow to the jaw back inside. Jericho is back up to send him to the apron though and the triangle dropkick connects to send us to a break.

Back with Sky still in trouble but hitting something like a Thesz press. A dropkick puts Jericho down and it’s the slingshot cutter for two. Jericho is right back with the Walls though, sending Sky straight to the ropes. Another cutter from Sky sets up a dragon sleeper but here’s Hager for the distraction into the break.

Jericho is back up for his half of a double clothesline and they’re both down again. Cue Kazarian and Daniels to go after Hager and drive him to the back, leaving Sky to hit the TKO for two. Sky gets two more off an enziguri but the Codebreaker pulls him out of the air for two more. A backslide gives Sky his own near fall but Jericho pulls him into the Walls for the tap at 12:13.

Rating: B-. This was a case where the ending wasn’t exactly in doubt but they gave us enough good stuff to make the match work. They weren’t out there a crazy amount of time and there was never a situation where I was thinking “get on with it because Sky isn’t winning”. It wasn’t the best match, but they didn’t do anything terrible or stupid and that means a lot.

Post match Jericho goes after Sky again but Moxley appears in the crowd for the big staredown to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. That’s probably the weakest and least interesting show they’ve done so far and it was still a perfectly watchable and at times good two hours of wrestling. The energy was a bit down though and very little felt like something you needed to see (though the opening segment was highly entertaining). The most promising thing for the future though is that this felt like a one off dip instead of something I’m worried about. It wasn’t a great show but I have no reason to believe that they’re falling apart. That isn’t the case for a lot of companies and it’s a good sign for them.

Results

Best Friends b. Lucha Bros – Crunchie to Pentagon

Bea Priestly/Emi Sakura b. Hikaru Shida/Kris Stadtlander – La Majistral to Stadtlander

Kenny Omega b. Pac – Crucifix

Maxwell Jacob Friedman b. Adam Page – Cross Rhodes

Chris Jericho b. Scorpio Sky – Walls of Jericho

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: June 27, 2005
Location: Arrowhead Pond, Anaheim, California
Attendance: 15,449
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Jonathan Coachman

It’s the night after Vengeance and that means it’s time to reset things for the long road to Summerslam. Batista and John Cena retained their World Titles and we should be in for a new set of challengers. Other than that, it’s going to be a big Diva Search night because we’re just that lucky. Let’s get to it.

Here are Sunday’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Kurt Angle to get things going. Angle talks about the series with Shawn Michaels being tied and how much the fans here would love to see round three tonight. Well that isn’t going to happen because Angle wants to face Batista. Instead here’s Ric Flair to cut him off, saying that he is a mark (his word) for Angle. Kurt has gotten so great so fast that it’s unbelievable, but Angle saying he’s the man is a step too far.

Flair still sees HHH as the man, but Angle sees three losses to Batista and three strikes you’re out. Last night, Batista and HHH proved that they are great. Kurt: “You’re looking at great.” Flair goes into a crazed rant about how if Angle tries to shoot on him, he’ll poke an eye, bite a finger or grab a rather sensitive area and pull. Angle sets up a match for the two of them instead. A WOO off ensues with Flair leaving.

We get an exclusive clip from last night with Bischoff making Chris Jericho/Christian/Tyson Tomko vs. Cena/two mystery partners.

Edge and Snitsky come out for a tag match against Kane/one of the two Draft picks tonight but Kane attacks Edge before the partner comes out. They fight into the crowd so Bischoff says we’ll be having a singles match instead.

Big Show vs. Snitsky

Show stomps away in the corner to start and then sends him into the other corner for a bonus. A suplex sets up more corner stomping and the chokeslam finishes Snitsky in a hurry. Just a squash to remind you that Big Show is a monster.

Maria is interviewing John Cena but can’t remember her questions. She leaves to go think of them and Cena is a little flabbergasted. Cena talks about overcoming the odds last night and has one of his two partners for the night in the form of….Shawn Michaels. The other partner is on the way. Maria comes back in and remembers her question: did Cena find a partner? Shawn: “You’re doing spectacular.”

Edge and Lita try to leave but Kane is in the dressing room to choke Lita. A lot of threats are made with Kane promising that this is just the beginning. Shouldn’t Edge realize that Lita has taken a long time to pick up a bag?

Masterlock Challenge, $14,000, Tajiri jumps Masters but loses anyway, mist to Masters.

It’s time for Carlito’s Cabana. Carlito is making changes around here, including replacing the Highlight Reel as the new big show. However, he can’t do all good things because his guest tonight is the final Draft pick: Rob Van Dam, who is still injured. Carlito calls him a lemon but Van Dam yells about Carlito being beaten down in the ring by the ECW locker room.

Van Dam liked giving a piece of his mind back at One Night Stand so he’s going to keep doing it here. He is one of the most influential names in wrestling and Carlito needs to get ready for Raw to be taken to the extreme. His knee is getting better, so Carlito kicks him in the leg crushes it against a table. We get some apple spitting for a bonus.

Kurt Angle vs. Ric Flair

Angle headlocks him down to start but it’s an early standoff. Flair is back up with some strutting and WOOing before sending Angle over the top. That means a chop against the barricade, followed by some fish hooking of all things back inside. Angle takes him down so Flair goes for the eye to drive him back into the corner.

They head back outside with Angle going head first into the steps but coming right back with an overhead belly to belly. Back from a break with Angle working on the arm and knocking him back to the floor. Flair goes more carnal and bites the thumb a few times so Angle punches him in the face. An elbow to the face puts Angle down and Flair goes up because he’s not all that bright.

Angle knocks him to the floor and grabs the ankle lock back inside, only to have Flair grab his crotch. That’s enough for the break and a chop block puts Angle down. The Figure Four has Angle in trouble until the roll to the ropes gets him out of trouble. The leg is fine enough for a German suplex but Flair kicks him low again. Angle isn’t having any more of this and picks the ankle for the ankle lock with the grapevine being enough to make Flair tap.

Rating: B. This was rather entertaining with Flair doing everything he could to stop Angle and eventually sending Angle into his top level stuff to finish him off. Flair cheating like crazy to hang with him was impressive and the way he should be doing things at this point. Above all else though, it was nice to see Flair getting to show how great he is without having everything be about HHH for once.

Smackdown Rebound.

Here are Coach and Christy Hemme to introduce the Diva Search finalists. The eight women (Ashley, Leyla, Summer, Krystal, Elizabeth, Simona, Cameron, Alexis) and Christy talks about how awesome it is to be a Diva. Coach is ready to explain tonight’s competition but here’s Viscera to interrupt. He talks about how they all have work to do and gyrates his hips.

The challenge tonight: thirty seconds to tell us about yourselves in your underwear. It’s exactly what it sounds like, though Leyla isn’t wearing anything under her dress so she can’t really participate. Alexis on the other hand, carrying a purse, sounds rather angry and pours a beer over herself. The fans boo this whole thing rather soundly. Dancing with Viscera ensues but here’s Sgt. Slaughter to say that next week, on the 4^th of July, there is going to be a bikini boot camp, including an obstacle course. This went on FAR too long and is setting a lower bar than last year.

Batista talks about how the Cell took something from him that he may never get back. It was worth it though.

Christian, Jericho and Tomko aren’t sure who the partner could be. Marty Jannetty is in jail and Kevin Nash would tear a hamstring reaching for the phone, but they are close to Hollywood and….nah.

Christian/Tyson Tomko/Chris Jericho vs. John Cena/Shawn Michaels/Hulk Hogan

Yeah that works. Shawn handles Hogan’s entrance and Cena drops to his knees in shock. I’d say Hogan has earned that level of respect. Joined in progress with Jericho charging into a boot in the corner and getting his head knocked off with a clothesline. It’s off to Shawn for the chops and the forearm into the nip up. A cheap shot from the apron slows him down though and we’re into the full on house show formula with the villains taking over, including the rotating stomps.

Jericho grabs the chinlock before kneeing Shawn in the ribs as the fans want Hogan. The Lionsault misses though and there’s your hot tag so Hogan can clean house. Jericho’s shot from behind puts Hogan down so Cena takes Jericho to the floor. It’s Hulk Up time with Shawn superkicking Christian, leaving Tomko to take the most famous two move sequence of all time (or second only to the kick to the gut/Stunner) for the pin.

Rating: D+. That is what Hogan is made for at this point in his career: get a big reaction for his entrance, stand on the apron and play cheerleader, get the hot tag and do his signature stuff. Cena’s reaction when Hogan was revealed was great and they had a perfectly watchable house show style main event. Now that might be out of place on Raw, but it’s Hogan and he can get away with anything for me.

A lot of posing closes the show.

Overall Rating: D. What was that? This was a one match and one surprise show with nothing else going on. There was barely any fallout from Vengeance and nothing remotely mentioned for Summerslam (fair enough), with the two Draft picks being as midcard as you can get. Then there’s the Diva Search, which was as lame as you can get. Terrible waste of time here, though Flair vs. Angle is good and I can always go for a Hogan cameo.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Vengeance 2005
Date: June 26, 2005
Location: Thomas & Mack Center, Las Vegas, Nevada
Attendance: 9,850
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Jonathan Coachman

I’m actually looking forward to this one as the card is stacked. We have HHH vs. Batista inside the Cell, John Cena facing Christian and Chris Jericho in a triple threat in his first defense as Raw World Champion and Kurt Angle vs. Shawn Michaels II. The rest of the show might not be great but those three matches should be more than enough. Let’s get to it.

The opening video focuses on the two World Title matches with the Cell getting more attention. Normally I would mock HHH for getting the attention but it’s the right call here.

Intercontinental Title: Shelton Benjamin vs. Carlito

Carlito is defending in a rematch from Monday when he won the title in the first place. Shelton takes him down in a hurry and the near fall has Carlito panicking. Lawler is right there with some actual analysis, saying that Shelton going for the pin so fast suggests he’s worried about Carlito escaping with the title. A shoulder gives Benjamin two and a knee to the ribs is good for the same.

Carlito gets in his own knockdown so Shelton nips up and knocks him outside without much trouble. The announcers are on it tonight, talking about how Shelton is looking a little shaky after the big fall on Monday. It isn’t that hard to tie stories together but it’s almost a rarity in WWE. Shelton won’t let Carlito walk away and gets two off a snap suplex. The attempted Stinger Splash misses so Shelton lands on top (egads man) and hits a top rope clothesline for two instead.

Carlito kicks him in the head to take over and some slams work on the back, which commentary had said was banged up from the crash. WHERE HAS THIS COMMENTARY BEEN ALL THESE YEARS??? Some stomping gets two but Shelton is right back up with a jumping elbow to the face.

A Samoan drop gives Shelton a delayed two and a backbreaker gets the same. The springboard bulldog gets another near fall so Shelton hammers in the corner, allowing Carlito to get a buckle pad off. The dragon whip hits Carlito’s shoulder but the Stinger Splash goes head first into the buckle to give Carlito the pin (with a handful of trunks) for the retaining pin.

Rating: C+. That’s one of the more enjoyable Carlito matches I can remember seeing as it included a nice story with the injured Shelton and Carlito going after the bad head. Shelton gets cheated out of the win (twice when you count the trunks) so now he can move up the ladder, but that might be weird in the current Raw environment.

Evolution arrives, with HHH in a gray suit and red shirt. That isn’t the best look for him but if anyone complains, he might talk to them and that’s the last thing we need.

We recap Victoria vs. Christy Hemme. Victoria wasn’t happy with Christy getting the star treatment and beat her up, including breaking a glass vase over her head. Christy has heart though and that’s all you need.

Christy Hemme vs. Victoria

Christy survives the early beatdown and sends Victoria’s head into the mat and buckle. A hot shot gets Victoria out of trouble as we hear about Christy wrestling with a concussion here. There’s your line that would never be allowed today, along with the second injury angle coming into a match.

A lot of choking ensues, plus a chinlock which is completely different. Lawler compares their attractiveness as the Widow’s Peak is countered into a rollup to give Christy two. Victoria misses the moonsault though and Christy gets all fired up, much to the fans’ annoyance. A DDT gets two but Victoria sits down on a sunset flip and grabs the ropes for the pin.

Rating: D. I feel bad for saying it was bad because Christy looks like she is really trying but it isn’t working. That’s absolutely not her fault though because there is no reason for her to wrestle on a major show this soon. Victoria did her best here but they were in a horrible situation that shouldn’t have been on pay per view.

John Cena talks about being the new kid, including making fun of Todd Grisham for having a rather embarrassing accident in high school. Cena is the new kid, Christian is the weird kid on the bus and Jericho wore leopard print spandex with a stuffed crotch to the promo. It doesn’t matter who you are though because this title is about being the best, not selling records. Cena is the kid most likely to kick somebody’s a** so the champ is here. The fire was strong here.

We recap Kane vs. Edge. Kane and Lita had one of the weirdest relationships in wrestling history but she left him for Edge, as Kane was turned into a stand-in for Matt Hardy. Kane broke up their wedding in the first stage of revenge with tonight being phase two. In other words, it’s all about vengeance.

Kane vs. Edge

Edge tries to jump him at the bell land gets hammered down in the corner for his efforts. A bunch of right hands are rained down and an uppercut makes it even worse. Kane clotheslines him to the floor but it’s time to go after Lita, which doesn’t seem to be the best idea. Edge’s save completely fails and Kane hammers away even more as the announcers do not have nice things to say about Lita.

The fans want Matt as Kane knocks Edge outside again but Lita grabs Edge’s foot so he can get in a posting. There’s a spear and baseball slide as the pace has slowed down a good bit. Back in and Edge slugs away but Kane does it a bit better, only to get caught with the Edge-O-Matic. Kane sits up, gets dropkicked back down and sits up again to start the comeback.

An uppercut knocks Edge out of the air but here’s Snitsky for the failed save attempt. Lita tries to bring in a chair before going with the romantic route, earning herself some choking. There’s no chokeslam, as Kane would rather tie the chair around her neck. Snitsky makes the real save with a big boot to give Edge two but he briefcases Snitsky by mistake. The chokeslam finishes Edge.

Rating: D+. It was pretty slow paced for the most part and then the ending was rather messy. The idea of Kane vs. Snitsky again gives me hives but this seemed to be more of a one off interference than anything else. The Lita/Edge vs. Kane stuff feels like it is coming to an end as well, as the story has been good but Kane just won the big match, so stretching it out further may not be the best idea.

We recap Kurt Angle vs. Shawn Michaels II. Kurt beat him in a masterpiece at Wrestlemania so Shawn wants a rematch. Game on.

Shawn doesn’t know if they can match the Wrestlemania efforts, but he guarantees vengeance.

Shawn Michaels vs. Kurt Angle

Angle crushes the arm to send Shawn outside for a breather so Angle goes right back to the leg, again sending Shawn to the rope. Shawn rolls out of the ankle lock and hits a clothesline to put Angle on the floor for a change. Instead of waiting, Shawn follows him out and gets suplexed onto the announcers’ table for the big crash. Back in and Angle stomps away in the corner as Shawn is bleeding from the eye.

A buckle bomb really rocks Shawn for two and the chinlock goes on. Angle clotheslines him down to break up the comeback attempt and an overhead belly to belly gets two. The second chinlock lasts a bit longer as Angle grinds him down. It turns into the long form version until Shawn suplexes his way out of trouble. Shawn wins a slugout and hits the forearm to start the real comeback.

The top rope elbow connects but Sweet Chin Music is broken up without much trouble. A tornado DDT gives Shawn three straight twos but it’s time to German suplex Shawn into the Angle Slam for the big near fall. Angle rolls him into the ankle lock and the counter takes out the referee. Shawn gets backdropped to the floor and the leg gets banged up all over again.

The ankle lock goes on in the middle of the ring and Shawn starts scrambling. He finally rolls Angle into the post and scores with Sweet Chin Music for a rather delayed near fall. Coach: “I’ve never seen anybody kick out of Sweet Chin Music!” Shawn’s leg is gone so he can’t follow up, allowing Angle to go up top. That’s never a good idea against Shawn, who superkicks him out of the air for the pin.

Rating: A-. You can’t live up to their first match and to be fair, they didn’t really try to. This was a great match in its own right, but were you expecting anything else from Shawn vs. Angle in a 26 minute match? These two are always going to have something like this because they’re incredibly talented. Outstanding match, even if it wasn’t their Wrestlemania masterpiece.

Coach tries to get Batista to say he’s scared of the Cell but Batista isn’t having any of that and looks ready to eat Coach’s head. HHH comes in to say he’ll win because no one beats him in the Cell. The fight is on with referees breaking it up in a hurry.

Here’s Lilian Garcia and there’s a big couch in the ring. She brings out Viscera, in the smoking jacket of course. Lilian talks about how she has grown to see how amazing he is and even sings a song for him. With that out of the way, Lilian proposes to him and he promises to take it into consideration.

Cue the Godfather though and he’s brought some women. He can’t let that happen, because these girls have been wanting to get a piece of him. Viscera looks at the women, shouts ALL ABOARD and leaves with Godfather and company. Lilian cries a lot as Viscera dances with the women. I’ve liked the whole deal, including a solid payoff like this.

We recap Christian and Chris Jericho challenging John Cena for the WWE Championship. Christian had been calling Cena out for weeks and the match was made, but then Jericho got involved by attacking Cena, turning it into a triple threat. Cena has been fired up at a different level lately and this is the kind of match that can help put him over the top on Raw.

WWE Championship: John Cena vs. Christian vs. Chris Jericho

Cena is defending and Christian has Tomko with him. Jericho slaps Cena in the face and gets tackled to start but it’s a Canadian double teaming to put Cena down in the corner. A hard whip into the corner puts Cena down so Jericho can turn on Christian as he had been wanting to do. Tomko gets in a hard clothesline on Jericho though, leaving Cena to beat up Christian. More Tomko cheating earns him an early ejection and it’s an FU to put Christian on the floor.

Jericho is right back in with a top rope elbow to the jaw for two on Cena and there’s the running bulldog. They head outside with Cena getting beaten up in a different way, with Jericho loading up the announcers’ table for a change. A DDT onto the floor drops Jericho but Christian is back up to take his place.

The chinlock has Cena in trouble in the ring and it’s Jericho cutting off the comeback without much trouble. Christian small packages Jericho for two but Cena is back in for the powerbomb portion of a Tower of Doom. Cena gets two each, followed by some hard clotheslines each. A drop toehold sends Christian’s head into Jericho’s and there’s the double Shuffle.

Jericho gets knocked to the floor but Christian rakes the eyes to escape the FU. The Unprettier gets two so Christian goes for the title, allowing Tomko to run in for a clothesline to Cena. Jericho puts Christian on the floor and gets the Walls on Cena, with Christian making the save. Cena picks Christian up for the FU, swings his feet into Jericho, and plants Christian to retain.

Rating: B. This took some time to get going but all three were hustling at the end and made it into a solid match. Cena is clearly the guy getting the rocket push and WWE would be crazy to not go that way. He’s popular, he’s getting better in the ring and he has the fire in his eyes. That’s what you look for and Cena has every bit of it. Christian and Jericho were great at helping him along here too, which is why Cena was in there with them. Rather good match, especially in the second half.

Cena celebrates in the crowd.

The Cell is lowered.

We recap HHH vs. Batista in the Cell. Batista beat him twice at back to back pay per views, but that’s not good enough for HHH, so we get the rematch in HIS match. They’ve made it very clear that HHH has all of the advantages here, which is a good story to tell between the two of them.

World Heavyweight Championship: HHH vs. Batista

In the Cell with Batista defending. Batista goes with the power to start, including the clothesline and a side slam. They head outside with HHH blocking a ram into the Cell but not being able to do it twice in a row. HHH is fine enough to send him into the post and then knocks him off the apron into the Cell. They’re getting into the violent stuff early on here and that’s nice for a change.

It’s toolbox time and HHH busts out a chain. Some whips to the back have Batista screaming in pain but it’s time for the real fun with HHH Hanging him over the top. As you might expect, Batista gets the chain off his throat and comes right back with some whipping of his own. HHH gets sent into the Cell to bust him open, meaning it’s time to grab a barbed wire chair. A few shots have Batista in trouble but he hits a clothesline and takes the chair away, cutting HHH’s head up with it for some retaliation.

The shoulders to the ribs in the corner but Batista misses a charge to give the incredibly bloody HHH a breather. Batista gets in a backdrop and a powerslam onto the barbed wire chair gets two. The Batista Bomb is countered into a DDT onto the chair and this time it’s Batista getting busted open. HHH rakes the cut across the Cell, because that is what you do in this situation.

It’s sledgehammer time (JR: “Not the d*** sledgehammer!” King: “Yes, the d*** sledgehammer JR.”) with a shot to Batista’s head getting two. A low blow gets Batista out of trouble for a bit and he grabs the sledgehammer but gets hit in the face with the chain. HHH goes up but dives into a sledgehammer shot, making him spit blood into the air for an outstanding visual. The whip over the corner has HHH in more trouble with a running steps shot making it worse.

The steps are loaded up in the corner with Batista ramming him head first into them over and over. A big whip into the steps makes it even worse but the Batista Bomb is countered into the Pedigree for the big near fall. Another Pedigree onto the steps is countered into a spinebuster onto them instead (THUD). Batista loads up the Batista Bomb with HHH grabbing the hammer, only to be dropped for the pin before the shot to the head can connect.

Rating: A-. This was indeed great as they set everything up exactly as they should have. They made a great spectacle out of Batista being the better man between the two with HHH losing in his match. That’s the story they have told for weeks now and it’s exactly what we got. It’s a heck of a fight with all kinds of blood and gore, making it feel like the Cell is supposed to. I had a good time with it and this makes Batista into the star he should be. Now STOP GIVING HHH WORLD TITLE MATCHES FOR A LONG TIME.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Survivor Series 2016
Date: November 20, 2016
Location: Air Canada Centre, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 17,143
Commentators: Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Mauro Ranallo, John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole, David Otunga

I say this every year but it’s always hard to believe that it’s been a full year since this show. This was the first time that a Survivor Series was expanded to four hours but thankfully there’s a good chance that they could make it work, mainly due to the elimination matches. The main event though is Brock Lesnar vs. Goldberg, which I’m sure will be completely uneventful. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Drew Gulak/Ariya Daivari/Tony Nese vs. Noam Dar/TJ Perkins/Rich Swann

This is a preview match for something called 205 Live, which debuts next week. I know it hasn’t gone great but the division really has evolved into a better place than when it started. Swann gets a nice reaction and then starts with Nese, who gets chopped in the corner. They do their regular flips with Swann’s jump over Nese’s feet getting a good pop (as always) before it’s off to Perkins.

Some suplexes set up an Octopus Hold but Nese reverses into a kind of gutwrench suplex. Gulak comes in and gets caught in the wrong corner with everyone working him over. We actually get a TJ PERKINS chant as he slaps on the kneebar to keep Gulak in trouble. Everything breaks down and we take a break.

Back with Daivari in trouble this time as Dar gets two off a running kick to the face. Nese offers a distraction though and a spinebuster takes Dar down. A superkick gives Daivari two and it’s back to Gulak to crank on the leg. If this sounds rather uninteresting, it’s only because that’s what it is.

Dar dropkicks his way to freedom and the hot tag brings in Swann to very little reaction. A good looking jumping hurricanrana takes Daivari off the middle rope as everything breaks down again. That means we hit the dives but the referee CUTS PERKINS OFF. Now you know that’s not working so Perkins dives over the referee to take out some villains. Back in and Swann’s standing 450 ends Daivari at 11:48.

Rating: C-. I forgot how uninteresting these earlier cruiserweight matches were. The guys barely have characters and the entire story here was “three faces vs. three heels”. It didn’t get much better for a long time but, as usual, the problem comes down to one simple thing: if the smaller guys on the main roster can be big stars and do all these dives, why should I be impressed when cruiserweights can do them too?

Kickoff Show: Luke Harper vs. Kane

Harper is part of the NEW Wyatt Family, which screwed Kane over, meaning we need a match here. Kane grabs a full nelson of all things and we’re in a chinlock fifteen seconds in. That goes nowhere so Harper grabs a headlock as the fans are oddly split here. Kane starts in on the shoulder by sending it into the buckle. Harper sends him outside though and hits that suicide shove of his (Who needs cruiserweights?).

A slingshot flip splash gives Luke two and we take a break. Back with Kane in a chinlock (well duh) but managing to superplex Harper down for a crash. The sidewalk slam gets two but Harper scores with a superkick for the same. Kane’s running DDT and Harper’s Boss Man Slam are good for two more each but it’s the chokeslam to put Harper away at 9:10.

Rating: D+. Well what were you expecting here? This was exactly the match you would have planned out for them and Kane won with his finisher. It’s about as paint by numbers of a power match as you can get and while it wasn’t terrible, it’s also a match I really didn’t need to see.

The opening video looks at Goldberg vs. Lesnar and then all the Raw vs. Smackdown matches. Well at least they got some time. I’m sure Stephanie’s voiceovers had nothing to do with it.

Raw Women’s Team vs. Smackdown Women’s Team

Raw: Bayley, Alicia Fox, Charlotte, Nia Jax, Sasha Banks

Smackdown: Alexa Bliss, Becky Lynch, Carmella, Naomi, Nikki Bella

Entrances alone take forever of course, which will be a theme tonight. Charlotte is Raw Women’s Champion and has Dana Brooke in her corner. Becky is Smackdown Women’s Champion but Nikki is captain. You know, because of course. Bliss gets a heck of a reaction (gee I wonder why). Actually hang on a second as there’s no Nikki. We cut to the back where she’s down after being attacked. Not to worry though, as Smackdown coach Natalya is more than willing to take the spot.

We settle down to Becky and Banks trading rollups before it’s off to Charlotte for more of the same. Becky can’t get the Disarm-Her and it’s off to Nia as things get a lot more difficult. Carmella and Bliss come in for the expected results and Naomi’s high crossbody is pulled out of the air. Natalya actually gets a reaction but Nia clotheslines her head off for her efforts. It’s off to Fox vs. Carmella with Alicia avoiding a Bronco Buster, setting up what looked to be a mostly missed ax kick for the elimination at 6:35. Bliss comes right in, sends Fox into the buckle and adds Twisted Bliss to tie it up at 6:48.

Charlotte and Naomi come in with the latter cleaning house, including knocking Nia outside and hitting a high crossbody to the floor. Nia posts her though and that’s a countout at 8:23. We pause for the Tye Dillinger TEN chant until Bliss takes Banks down and grinds her face into the mat. Banks sends Bliss and Natalya into each other, followed by the double knees in the corner to Alexa. Back up and Bliss saves Natalya from the Bank Statement, allowing Natalya to roll Banks up for the elimination at 10:20.

Charlotte comes in and gets suplexed, meaning we hit the SUPLEX CITY chants. You would think fans would know more chants than that. Charlotte goes up for the moonsault but, as always, Natalya powerbombs her down for two in the near fall that never ends Charlotte. The required Sharpshooter sends Charlotte crawling for the ropes but a big boot ends Natalya at 12:01.

Becky and Bliss get in an argument over who should come in, allowing Jax to suplex them both at the same time. Of course that gets a MAMA MIA from Mauro, which I miss hearing so often. Bliss gets caught in a slam but Becky makes a blind tag and missile dropkicks Bliss in the back to knock her onto Jax. The Disarm-Her actually makes Jax tap at 13:35 and it’s 2-2 with Becky/Bliss vs Charlotte/Bayley.

Jax mauls Becky, leaving Bliss to get big booted down for the elimination at 14:03. Becky fights back as fast as she can with the series of clotheslines into the leg lariat, followed by Bexplex. Bayley has to dive in for a save after a top rope legdrop before coming in for the slugout. Another Bexplex gets two but Bayley’s elbow to the back gets the same. You can tell Becky is getting tired out there so Bayley blocks the Disarm-Her and grabs the Bayley to Belly for the final pin at 17:53.

Rating: C+. The quick eliminations didn’t help things here but the ending was the right call. There was way too much talent on the Raw side to lose and I’m VERY glad it was Natalya, who can wrestle this style without having to dumb things down too much. Becky was pretty much all the blue team had for a lot of the match and she put up a valiant effort, only to be outgunned. That makes her look strong and Bayley getting a win like this is a good thing for her at this stage in her main roster career.

Charlotte takes Bayley out post match and beats her around ringside.

Smackdown mascot James Ellsworth runs into Karl Anderson and Luke Gallows, who weren’t funny in 2016 either. They make some bad chin puns but Raw GM Mick Foley comes in to run them off. Ellsworth talks about all the great memories he has of Foley, most of which involve him being in extreme pain. Foley thanks him anyway and suggests Ellsworth move to Raw. He appreciates the offer but politely turns it down because he’s true blue. Foley leaves and Ellsworth runs into Braun Strowman, who asks if he knows Ellsworth. James runs in a smart move.

Intercontinental Title: Miz vs. Sami Zayn

Miz is defending and Sami is trying to take the title to Raw. We get the Big Match Intros and Sami gets quite the reaction for being Canadian. Sami spins out of a wristlock to start and Miz looks annoyed in the corner. Miz gets sent outside but Sami has to bail out of the flip dive. The moonsault off the barricade works though, drawing over Maryse for a distraction. Well she can be quite distracting.

This one works well with Miz taking out the knee to get his first advantage. Some hard stomps to the knees have Sami in trouble but he’s still able to clothesline Miz to the floor. A flip dive works as well, followed by a Michinoku Driver for two. Miz’s short DDT gets the same and it’s time for a double breather. The running corner dropkick/clothesline look to set up the ax handle but Sami reverses into the Blue Thunder Bomb.

The Helluva Kick only hits corner though and that means the Figure Four. This one stays on for a good while until Sami makes the ropes, earning himself some YES Kicks. Sami reverses one into a Figure Four of his own but Maryse rings the bell. Since Sami isn’t all that bright, he of course falls for it, only to have Miz roll him up to retain at 14:06.

Rating: C-. Kind of a dull match as you knew a lot of Sami’s near falls weren’t going anywhere. I can go for Miz and Maryse teaming up to steal wins though and it’s a big reason why he’s been an awesome Intercontinental Champion. This would also help play into Sami’s heel turn nearly a year later as he would get tired of losing while playing by the rules. Makes sense, especially in a long term form.

Dean Ambrose and AJ Styles are bickering over being teammates tonight when Shane McMahon comes in and tells them to cool it so Smackdown doesn’t lose again.

Raw Tag Teams vs. Smackdown Tag Teams

Raw: Enzo Amore/Big Cass, Cesaro/Sheamus, Gallows and Anderson, New Day, Shining Stars

Smackdown: American Alpha, Breezango, Heath Slater/Rhyno, Hype Bros, Usos

A fall eliminates both members of a team. Enzo and Cass suck up to the live crowd, as you might expect. New Day and Slater/Rhyno are the respective champions. Fandango tries to give everyone a fashion ticket to start, earning himself a Midnight Hour for the elimination at 44 seconds. New Day spends too much time celebrating though and it’s a superkick from Jimmy to pin Big E. at 1:08.

Gallows comes in to punch Jimmy in the face before handing it off to Cass for the tall power. The fast tags continue as it’s off to Epico vs. Ryder (who is rocking some old school Survivor Series logo trunks) with Mojo coming in for a clap around the ears. Rawley gets taken down into the corner for the huge group beating though as we keep trying to get everyone in. It’s back to Ryder (not Slater like the fans want) but Gallows saves Anderson from the Broski Boot. Instead it’s the Magic Killer to pin Ryder at 5:08.

Gable comes in as Graves talks about how scared he is of American Alpha. It doesn’t seem to be the most valid fear to start though as Epico takes Gable down into a chinlock. Some rolling suplexes have Gable in more trouble and Primo comes in with a springboard ax handle to the ribs. He misses a charge in the corner though and it’s off to Jordan for a quick Steiner Bulldog to get rid of the Stars at 8:08.

The six remaining teams (Enzo/Big Cass, Cesaro/Sheamus, Gallows and Anderson vs. American Alpha, Heath Slater/Rhyno, Usos) come in at once as everything breaks down. That means Enzo gets tossed over the top onto a big pile….which was mainly Raw guys but whatever. Rhyno gets thrown over the top as well, only to have Slater add an even bigger dive. Back in and Cesaro swings Jordan but Gable makes the save with a Rolling Chaos Theory.

Gable isn’t done though as Jordan throws him over the top for a HUGE flip dive onto everyone. Sweet goodness those two were awesome together. I mean, not as awesome as Jordan on his own with Kurt Angle kind of around but still. Back in and it’s a quick Magic Killer to get rid of Jordan at 10:39 as the eliminations are still flying. A spinebuster plants Slater and he’s caught in the wrong corner.

Sheamus won’t tag Cesaro (this was before their ridiculous matching outfits) and an argument breaks out, allowing the hot tag off to Rhyno as everyone bickers. Rhyno comes in and Gores Gallows for an elimination at 12:28. Cass wastes no time with a big boot to Rhyno, followed by the Bada Boom Shaka Lacka for the pin at 12:45.

That leaves us with the Usos….who superkick Enzo down to set up the Superfly Splash and an elimination at 13:26 before I can type the Raw teams. So now we’re down to the Usos vs. Cesaro/Sheamus with the latter hitting the ten forearms (you know the chant) on Jimmy. Cesaro comes in and eats a double superkick but Sheamus Brogue kicks Jimmy with Jey making a diving save.

Super White Noise plants Jimmy again but Jey is right back with a Superfly Splash for two with Cesaro making a save of his own. The hot tag brings in Cesaro for the Uppercut Train and a 619 as the fans lose their minds over Cesaro again. A high crossbody gets two on Jey and it’s time for the Swing. Jimmy breaks up the Sharpshooter and Jey gets the Tequila Sunrise. That’s reversed right back into the Sharpshooter with Sheamus remembering he’s in the match to cut off Jimmy, leaving Jey to tap at 18:55.

Rating: B. This was during the time that I couldn’t stand Sheamus and Cesaro (not a lot has changed in a year) but they did a lot of stuff in this match, despite the crunched timeline. Getting nine eliminations in less than nineteen minutes is a lot but you have to clear the ring out at the beginning. It’s entertaining, but hits a hard ceiling that it’s not getting past.

Stephanie and Foley decide that Sheamus and Cesaro should get a Tag Team Title shot tomorrow night. They recap the rest of the show with Stephanie getting way too serious, as usual.

Preview for TLC with Dean Ambrose vs. AJ Styles in a TLC match for the title.

Cruiserweight Champion Brian Kendrick does his best Sean O’Haire impression and is ready for Kalisto. If Kalisto wins, he brings the division to Smackdown. It’s fine for a one off match but it was really hard to buy Kendrick as the best cruiserweight in the company in 2016.

Cruiserweight Title: Kalisto vs. Brian Kendrick

Kendrick is defending and charges straight into a knee to the face. Kalisto is right back with a suicide dive, followed by a springboard corkscrew crossbody for two. Some rollups give Kalisto more near falls and a shotgun dropkick has Kendrick in even more trouble. A rollup into the corner finally gives Kendrick a breather and he crushes Kalisto between the steps and the apron for good measure.

Back in and we hit the cravate to slow things back down. Kalisto manages to fight up and get to the apron where he grabs a C4 out to the floor in the big crash of the match. A good looking suicide dive takes Kendrick down again but he reverses a super Salida Del Sol into the Captain’s Hook. Kalisto finally grabs the ropes and fires off some kicks, followed by the hurricanrana driver. The Salida Del Sol gets two with Kendrick getting to the ropes. Kalisto heads up top….and here’s Baron Corbin for the DQ at 12:21.

Rating: C-. The match was good at times but Kendrick really isn’t the kind of guy you want as a long term champion. It also didn’t help that you knew they weren’t changing up the cruiserweight division so close to 205 Live’s launch. Corbin interfering was fine enough, but it really does make the title match feel like a big waste of time.

The Kickoff Show panel recaps the show so far.

Daniel Bryan yells at Corbin, who doesn’t want little pests running around on Smackdown.

We recap the men’s Survivor Series match, which started in July at the second Brand Split. Naturally this is about the McMahons as Shane and Stephanie are the Commissioners and therefore they have to be fighting. We look at all the entrants as this is treated like the major match is should be treated as. Then Shane is added to the match and that notion kind of falls apart.

Raw Men’s Team vs. Smackdown Men’s Team

Raw: Braun Strowman, Chris Jericho, Kevin Owens, Roman Reigns

Seth Rollins

Smackdown: AJ Styles, Bray Wyatt, Dean Ambrose, Randy Orton, Shane McMahon

AJ and Owens are the World Champions, Reigns is US Champion and Ellsworth is here as the mascot. This is also during the period where Orton is part of the Wyatt Family because we needed that story to get to Orton as World Champion again. Rollins gets a nice reaction and it’s far better without BURN IT DOWN or whatever the line is. AJ and Owens start things off with Styles wasting no time in hitting the drop down into the dropkick.

That’s enough of that though as it’s and they slug it out with AJ getting the better of it. The STUPID IDIOT chants mean it’s time for Jericho, who throws his shirt at AJ and hammers away. Styles dropkicks him down again as the announcers discuss Jericho insulting Undertaker on Twitter. It’s off to Ambrose vs. Rollins, which turns into far more of a wrestling match than it should.

Rollins can’t get a Pedigree so let’s go back to Jericho. Chris yells at Dean for the $15,000 jacket issue, earning himself some really bad armdrags. An enziguri cuts Dean down for two but Ambrose is right back with a bunch of right hands to the head. Shane comes in for the first time and my interest goes down. I’m still not a fan of middle aged Shane and this isn’t likely to change things.

Shane’s bad punches and an armdrag (better than Dean’s) take Jericho down until a dropkick cuts him off. The announcers debate the TV ratings as Reigns comes in and gets booed out of the building. Roman hammers him down in the corner and Seth comes in for a chinlock. That’s broken up so let’s go with Dean vs. Kevin. Owens hits a superkick but gets caught in a hurricanrana, only to have Jericho break up Dirty Deeds.

Everything breaks down and Strowman tags himself in, leaving the fans to chant for Ellsworth. The fight heads outside with Dean being left alone in the ring until Strowman catches his slingshot dive. Strowman walks him around the ring until AJ’s slingshot forearm to the floor breaks it up. Owens dives onto everyone and Strowman tosses Shane across the ring in a pretty good power display.

Some double teaming doesn’t do much to stop Strowman but they manage to knock him outside. That’s enough of Dean and Ambrose working together so they get in a fight, allowing Strowman to hit the running powerslam for the pin on Dean at 15:57. AJ was looking right at the cover and didn’t move. Shane gets to beat on Strowman for a bit but thankfully he gets hammered down as well.

The Phenomenal Forearm is pulled out of the air with AJ being tossed outside in a nasty heap. Orton gets thrown aside too but a stare from Bray stops Strowman in his tracks. Strowman grabs Jericho by the throat but decides to run Bray over instead, followed by a dropkick to put him on the floor. Braun goes outside as well but runs into an RKO onto the announcers’ table. After we pause to see what a random eight year old fan thought of it (he was applauding), Shane drops the top rope elbow to put Strowman through said table. That and Ellsworth grabbing Braun’s foot get Strowman counted out at 21:18.

Strowman catches Ellsworth running up the ramp though (How slow is this guy?) and throws him off the stage through some tables. Everyone else is mostly dead until Jericho covers Shane for two. Owens is fresh enough to drop the backsplash on Shane for two (but only after mocking the dance). There’s the Lionsault but Shane gets two of his own off a small package.

Shane takes a Codebreaker but Orton comes in before the cover, meaning Shane survives another finisher. He avoids a top rope splash though and it’s off to AJ to work on Jericho. With Owens getting in an insult to AJ’s hair (too far man), Jericho counters the Styles Clash into a failed Walls attempt. The Phenomenal Blitz rocks Jericho but Owens comes in with the List of Jericho to blast AJ. That’s a DQ at 29:23, but not before he gives AJ a Pop Up Powerbomb.

Orton gets the tag and comes in with the RKO to get rid of Jericho at 30:19. Notice Reigns blankly staring up at the ramp and not hearing the RKO RIGHT IN FRONT OF HIM. So it’s down to Shane/AJ/Orton/Wyatt vs. Reigns/Rollins with Orton hammering on Rollins to start. Wyatt and Orton take turns on Seth as Shane is still laid on the apron after his long time in the ring. The superplex takes Rollins down (looks great too) but it allows the hot tag to Reigns. AJ comes in as well and MY GOODNESS the fans do not like Reigns.

House is cleaned with a series of Samoan drops, followed by a great looking Razor’s Edge powerbomb for two on AJ. Seriously that was good enough to cut off the booing. A Pele cuts off a Superman Punch and it’s back to Shane for no logical reason. Shane gets in a tornado DDT to drop Reigns and a clothesline takes Rollins down. Reigns tries a spear but gets awkwardly countered into the post.

In probably the spot of the match, Shane loads up Coast to Coast but gets speared out of the air for a SICK landing. Shane actually kicks out at two but you can see that he is completely gone. Like Lesnar after the botched shooting star gone. The referee says Shane is eliminated at 37:07, presumably due to his brains looking like a pie that has been run over by a bus driven by raccoons.

We pause for a bit as doctors get Shane out of the ring until Roman blasts Bray with a clothesline. Rollins and AJ get stereo hot tags with Seth’s Blockbuster putting Styles down. There’s the slingshot knee to AJ and a suicide dive to Wyatt. With Reigns down on the floor, let’s hit that ROMAN’S SLEEPING chant! Still one of my favorites because the fans just will not give him a break no matter what. An enziguri staggers AJ on top and now it’s WAKE UP ROMAN. Reigns does in fact wake up and saves Rollins from a hanging DDT on the floor.

With Orton down, it seems as good a time as any for a DoubleBomb. Styles makes a save before it can be loaded up but here’s Ambrose to jump Styles again. The fans call Dean a STUPID IDIOT as the former Shield beats up security. NOW the TripleBomb puts AJ through the table, allowing Rollins to get the pin at 47:00. It’s down to two on two with the Wyatts vs. the Shield (not the worst idea in the world)….and here’s Luke Harper for a distraction so the Wyatts can take over.

Reigns posts Orton but Harper superkicks him down, only to have Rollins score with a flip dive to the floor. Back in and the low superkick hits Wyatt but he dives into an RKO, giving Bray the pin at 49:25. Reigns, all alone, sends both of them outside and takes Harper out as a bonus. Back in and Orton eats a spear to save Wyatt, leaving Bray to grab Sister Abigail for the pin at 52:50.

Rating: A. This is a great example of a match that benefits from all of the time it had. What I loved about this was how long it took to take someone out. Most of the people in here were former World Champions and it doesn’t make sense to have them losing in a minute or two like in the other matches. They let the match build up for a change and that’s what makes this feel important.

Above all else though, this felt like someone surviving instead of whoever was left last. Look at the women’s match. Bayley barely looked like she had been through anything at the end. Orton and Wyatt looked banged up, which is how they should after a match like this. It’s a well put together match that got the kind of time it needed, which is exactly how something like this should be. Really strong stuff here with Bray, who actually needed it, getting the win.

We recap Goldberg vs. Brock Lesnar. Goldberg was being interviewed about being in WWE2K16 and said he didn’t owe Lesnar a rematch. Lesnar challenged him though and Goldberg wanted his son to see him wrestle. The match was on and it does indeed feel like a battle of two people who could kill each other.

Brock Lesnar vs. Goldberg

We get the full Goldberg entrance, complete with someone knocking on his door. Lesnar drives him into the corner to start but Goldberg shoves him right back down, scaring the heck out of Lesnar in the process. Back up and the spear connects to drop Lesnar again. There’s a second spear, followed by a Jackhammer to give Goldberg the huge upset at 1:25.

Yeah I still don’t like it. Sure it was shocking and a huge moment, but what did this set up? Goldberg eliminating Lesnar from the Rumble, Goldberg getting the most unnecessary Universal Title reign ever, and then a good sub five minute match at Wrestlemania. One of WWE’s biggest issues is giving fans something to cheer for and they give this spot to Goldberg, who they didn’t even create, for the sake of a video game (might not have been their call) and a story that could have made someone’s career. After this, Samoa Joe and Braun Strowman both fell to Lesnar, but Goldberg doesn’t. I don’t buy it, nor to I like it.

Goldberg celebrates with his family to end the show.

Overall Rating: B+. One of the major perks about a match running nearly an hour on a three and a half hour show is that it can REALLY bring an overall rating up. Throw in a good women’s match and nothing really bad, this is actually a strong show. It’s far from perfect (main event aside, though that was the only thing that could have closed the show) but it’s a heck of a card, which I can always go for of course. The main issue is they could have gotten this one under three hours so it’s a bit long but nothing too bad. Really solid show though and most of that is due to the mega long match.

Ratings Comparison

Rich Swann/Noam Dar/TJ Perkins vs. Ariya Daivari/Tony Nese/Drew Gulak

Original: C

Redo: C-

Kane vs. Luke Harper

Original: C-

Redo: D+

Women’s Survivor Series Match

Original: C

Redo: C+

Miz vs. Sami Zayn

Original: C+

Redo: C-

Tag Team Survivor Series Match

Original: D+

Redo: B

Kalisto vs. Brian Kendrick

Original: C

Redo: C-

Men’s Survivor Series Match

Original: A-

Redo: A

Goldberg vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Overall Rating

Original: C-

Redo: B+

My eyebrows went up when I saw the original overall rating. The year of mellowing on the ending have helped a lot as there’s no way this is a B-. Also I really couldn’t stand Sheamus and Cesaro back then.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2016/11/20/survivor-series-2016-there-are-no-words/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Survivor Series 2016
Date: November 20, 2016
Location: Air Canada Centre, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Mauro Ranallo, John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole, David Otunga

Pre-Show: Ariya Daivari/Drew Gulak/Tony Nese vs. TJ Perkins/Rich Swann/Noam Dar

Swann gets out of a suplex to start and dropkicks Nese in the jaw before handing it off to TJ. More flipping ensues and we can hear Renee Young talking to her producer and saying “nine minutes”. The kneebar has Gulak in trouble but everything breaks down to send us to a break.

Pre-Show: Kane vs. Luke Harper

The opening video is pretty standard and focuses on the three elimination tags plus Goldberg vs. Lesnar.

Raw: Bayley, Alicia Fox, Nia Jax, Charlotte, Sasha Banks

Smackdown: Nikki Bella, Natalya, Carmella, Naomi, Becky Lynch

Charlotte destroys Bayley post match to set up the next title feud.

Anderson and Gallows pick on James Ellsworth until Mick Foley comes in for the save. After talking about how much he loved seeing Foley get beaten up as a kid, Ellsworth turns down an offer to come to Raw. Braun Strowman comes up and scares Ellsworth away.

Intercontinental Title: The Miz vs. Sami Zayn

Sami comes right back with a flip dive and the Michinoku Driver for two but Miz starts doing Daniel Bryan stuff again and takes over. That just means a Blue Thunder Bomb to give Sami two but the Helluva Kick only hits the buckle. The Figure Four goes on until Sami turns it over for the counter.

Survivor Series Tag Team Elimination Match: Team Raw vs. Team Smackdown

Raw: Enzo Amore and Big Cass, New Day, Anderson and Gallows, Shining Stars,

Smackdown: Heath Slater/Rhyno, Breezango, Usos, American Alpha, Hype Bros

Stephanie McMahon and Foley give Cesaro and Sheamus a Tag Team Title match tomorrow night on Raw.

Cruiserweight Title: Kalisto vs. Brian Kendrick

Corbin gives Kalisto the End of Days.

Pre-Show recap.

Team Raw Men vs. Team Smackdown Men

Raw: Kevin Owens, Chris Jericho, Roman Reigns, Seth Rollins, Braun Strowman

Smackdown: Shane McMahon, Bray Wyatt, Randy Orton, Dean Ambrose, AJ Styles

Goldberg vs. Brock Lesnar

Lesnar drives him into the corner to start but Goldberg hits two spears in the first minute. The Jackhammer beats Lesnar in ONE MINUTE THIRTY SEVEN SECONDS!!!

SCREW YOU DEAN AMBROSE, RANDY ORTON, AND ANYONE ELSE THAT LESNAR HAS KILLED BECAUSE GOLDBERG JUST BEAT HIM IN A MINUTE AND A HALF!!!

The show goes off the air before 10:30 with nothing else happening.

Results

Team Raw Women b. Team Smackdown Women – Bayley to Belly to Lynch

The Miz b. Sami Zayn – Rollup

Team Raw Tag Teams b. Team Smackdown Tag Teams – Sharpshooter to Jimmy Uso

Brian Kendrick b. Kalisto via DQ when Baron Corbin interfered

Team Smackdown Men b. Team Raw Men – Sister Abigail to Reigns

Goldberg b. Brock Lesnar – Jackhammer

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: June 20, 2005
Location: American West Arena, Phoenix, Arizona
Attendance: 5,500
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Vengeance is on Sunday and that means it’s time for the final push towards what is looking like a stacked show. There are already several major matches set for the show and that means we should be in for a heck of a card once we get there. That is Sunday though and we need one more final push to get there. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here’s John Cena to get things going. Cena thinks this place is like the wild wild west and he liked the sound of something like that. If Christian and Chris Jericho want a shot at the WWE Championship, Cena completely gets it because this is what matters most. As for tonight, Jericho needs to get out here and take a beating personally. He hasn’t forgotten about Christian either so let’s do it right now.

Instead here are Muhammad Hassan and Daivari, with JR thinking they aren’t Christian and Jericho. Hassan can’t believe that Cena has anything to complain about because the people here in Phoenix welcomed him with open arms. Last week he was screwed out of the Intercontinental Title and he deserves some respect.

Cena makes fun of his whining and suggests that Daivari gives him some special spankings. Cena: “These people don’t hate you because you’re Arab American. They hate you because you’re a****** American.” The challenge is thrown out for tonight and Eric Bischoff shows up to make it a title match. Cena is ready to go right now and I think you know how that is going to go.

We look at Lita filing for divorce from Kane, setting up her wedding to Edge tonight.

Bischoff is in the ring to introduce the newest Draft pick: Carlito. Before we get to that though, Bischoff brings out Shelton Benjamin, who was a big deal in last year’s Draft. Shelton has been Intercontinental Champion since October but he beat a champion who didn’t know who he was going to face. That’s what Shelton is going to do tonight, against the new Draft pick.

Intercontinental Title: Shelton Benjamin vs. Carlito

Shelton is defending and has to fight out of the corner to start. That’s enough to send Carlito outside for a breather so Shelton tries the big running flip dive but catches his foot to make him crash hard, with Carlito just getting underneath him for the save. Back from a break with Shelton fighting out of a chinlock, only to get punched back down. Shelton finally manages a double clothesline for the double knockdown.

The comeback is on with a backdrop and the top rope clothesline gets two. Shelton is a little shaken up from the crash earlier so Carlito plants him with a DDT. It doesn’t do much harm as he goes up top and hits a super sunset flip for two, followed by a Samoan drop for a rather weak cover. Carlito is right back with a rollup though and a grab of the rope is enough for the pin and the title.

Rating: C-. I wasn’t exactly impressed here but they told a story and got enough of a match out of things. I’m still not wild on Carlito and that was a heck of a way to just drop Shelton’s lengthy title reign. They did make sure to protect him a bit, but he should be moving up to the World Title scene now, which isn’t happening with Cena around.

Maria asks Carlito how he won and he says he pinned Shelton. He’ll be the greatest Intercontinental Champion WWE has ever seen. But first, he spits some apple on Maria.

Viscera vs. Simon Dean

Lilian is VERY pleased to handle Viscera’s…..introduction. Simon rips on Viscera for his weight (Dean: “Who do you think you are? Hugh Hefner?”) and gets in a few shots to the leg to start. He stops to show off for Lilian a bit though and the destruction is quick, capped off by the Visagra and the chokebomb.

Post match Lilian gets in the ring and says they have been moving fast. She wants to go faster though and on Sunday, he might hit the jackpot in Vegas. Kissing ensues.

Another look at the Raw Diva Search process. I believe this is the same video from last time.

Chris Jericho is ready to get his title shot and doesn’t care if the fans are annoyed with him. The only reason Cena’s albums are doing better than Fozzy’s are because Cena is the champ of course. Christian comes in to suggest that Hassan might win the title tonight, but Jericho always overlooks people. Like he overlooked Christian at Wrestlemania XX. Jericho can want to go platinum but Christian is going gold on Sunday.

Video on HHH’s history in the Cell.

Bischoff is worried when Kurt Angle comes in. Kurt brags about beating Shawn Michaels at Wrestlemania and promises to make him tap again on Sunday. This time though, the win is dedicated to Bischoff.

And now, Edge and Lita are getting married. Edge is rather swanky in his black cowboy hat, leather pants, cane, skull and crossbones tie and briefcase. Lita on the other hand is basically wearing most of a sheet (Lawler heartily approves). JR: “Her shoulder tattoo matches her shoes.” The YOU SCREWED Matt chants start up and we get a video on their very speedy romance.

The minister has to stop various things from happening and says a rather large man has insisted on coming down to say something. That would be Snitsky, with a sleeveless tuxedo. It isn’t his fault that they fell in love and it’s not his fault that things went in this direction, just like it isn’t his fault that Kane can’t get in his erection. Snitsky: “It’s not my fault that you had a dead baby in your uterus.”

They read their vows, including Edge saying that he is Mr. Money in the Sack and not a big bald monster. Lita on the other hand says she has never been in love with anyone before and doesn’t care about what the people say. Lita: “I am proud to be the s*** of the century.” The minister says the big line of speak now or forever hold your peace and you can see Edge and Lita get worried.

Matt Hardy’s music hits and Jim Ross does his shocked voice….but no one is here because Edge and Lita can have some fun with us too. The minister is ready to marry them in the name of the…..and here’s Kane through the ring to break things up. Edge throws the minister at Kane and runs off with Lita. The set is destroyed and Kane Tombstones the minister to add to his scrapbook. Edge and Lita are terrified with Edge’s facials being great as always. This had some great moments, with Snitsky’s lines and the Matt Hardy tease being outstanding.

Post break, Kane says he is back.

Christy Hemme looks back at Victoria attacking her three weeks ago and then jumping Victoria in retaliation. Victoria makes her blood boil and Christy wants to rip her head off. Cue Victoria to break something made of glass over her back. Victoria leaves and there is a lot of blood coming from the back of Christy’s head.

Post break, Christy is loaded into an ambulance and can’t remember her name. This has been your filler as they reset the ring.

WWE Championship: John Cena vs. Muhammad Hassan

Cena is defending. It’s another fast start with a running clothesline putting Hassan on the floor. Daivari gets knocked down as well but he grabs Cena’s feet so Hassan can stomp away. Hassan gets a few twos off boots and a suplex but Cena is right back with the clotheslines. The ProtoBomb and the Shuffle set up the FU to give Hassan his first pinfall loss in less than two minutes. Well that came out of nowhere, but Cena gets more fuel in his rocket.

Post match Christian and Jericho jump Cena on the ramp and the beatdown is on.

During the break, Christian gets out as fast as he can.

Here are the Diva Search finalists: Leyla, Ashley, Kristal, Cameron, Elisabeth, Alexis, Summer and Simona. They’re all good looking and we find out where they’re from. I’m not sure what else there is to say here.

Batista vs. Kurt Angle

Non-title. Batista elbows his way out of a waistlock to start and hits the shoulders in the corner. Angle is right back with an early ankle lock but that’s broken up with straight power. The missed charge sends Batista shoulder first into the post though and it’s off to a Fujiwara armbar. That’s broken up with a side slam and Batista clotheslines him to the floor, so it’s HHH and Ric Flair running in to jump Batista for the DQ. That would be their only singles match ever.

Shawn, save, Bischoff, tag.

Shawn Michaels/Batista vs. Kurt Angle/HHH

Joined in progress with Shawn and HHH slugging it out until Shawn hits the flying forearm. Angle tries to come in so Flair sneaks in to chop Shawn’s block. Another distraction lets Flair wrap the knee around the post and Angle slaps on a Brock Lock. The villains take turns on the knee and it’s an STF to stay on the leg. A belly to back suplex gets Shawn out of trouble for all of three seconds as it’s back to HHH to drop elbows to the leg.

The WOO looks to set up a Figure Four but HHH gets kicked into the buckle. That’s enough for the hot tag to Batista and hammering ensues. Everything breaks down with Angle being sent to the floor so Shawn can throw him over the barricade. They fight into the crowd, leaving Batista to hit the spinebuster (JR: “That rattled my Oklahoma hat!”) but a Flair distraction lets HHH get the Pedigree for the pin.

Rating: C-. The announcers act like this is some monumental pin and while it is a big deal to have Batista get pinned, I still need a long break from HHH in the title picture. That really needs to come sooner rather than later and just after Sunday would be as good of a time as any.

HHH talks trash and replays take us out.

Overall Rating: C. This was quite the oddball show with stuff like the Hassan loss and the title change coming out of nowhere. They’re not necessarily bad, but when you seem to be going in a direction and then switch gears out of nowhere, it can be a little jarring. The wedding was entertaining and I can go with some build towards Vengeance, but Shawn and Angle didn’t get any significant time to themselves. But hey, at least we got to see the next round of women who stand around backstage for the next few years.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Survivor Series 2009
Date: November 22, 2009
Location; Verizon Center, Washington D.C.
Attendance: 12,500
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Matt Striker, Michael Cole

Well here we are. After a month of build up, we’re at the Survivor Series. Since most of you have been watching the buildup, I’ll spare you the details of it. The card looks pretty good if nothing else. I’m not wild on the treatment the two triple threats are getting as they seem like the belts are being made silly which simply never works for me. I will say this though: the team matches have been booked and built very well.

That’s the key to these shows I think as you can advance feuds, like Orton vs. Kofi without actually having them fight. That’s invaluable as in today’s market you have so many PPVs dominating the market that saving some of the matches is the best thing possible. Let’s do it as I’m doing this one live so it’s going to be a bit less wordy.

The opening video talks about the history of the show. I’ve been doing that for a month so whatever.

Team Miz vs. Team Morrison

Miz, Drew McIntyre, Sheamus, Ziggler, Swagger
Morrison, Matt Hardy, Evan Bourne, Shelton Benjamin, Finlay

NOW THIS IS MORE LIKE IT! This is what the Series should be about: promoting the midcard. The most important thing about the midcard here: it exists. For so many years there just hasn’t been one as everyone is just sent to the main event or is a jobber. Here are ten guys that are firmly in the midcard. The heels are quite a team actually and there’s at least four great theme songs in there. Sheamus is a very good monster heel.

I’d bet on Lawler trying to cause Sheamus his match. The description of Miz is perfect: you might like him but you just won’t admit it. How true is that? Apparently Sheamus’ day may come tonight. There’s nothing like that great Lawler analysis. We start with Swagger and Bourne, which is a rather odd but interesting pairing. I guess that’s the point here. Allegedly Miz was at the first Survivor Series. So is he like a poor man’s Foley or something?

The stream isn’t being very nice so this could be a bit spotty here. As for reasons as to why these guys are here, more or less most of these feuds aren’t happening anymore but they were recently enough so I guess that counts for something. Ok the live idea didn’t work as I couldn’t find a good enough stream so this is being written very early Tuesday morning now. DAng it’s weird writing one of these since I haven’t done one in months now.

Seeing Sheamus after the ending of Raw is just a bit odd. Swagger is just made of awesome. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a small package blocked before. Ziggler beats the heck out of Bourne which makes me wonder if he’ll, meaning Ziggler, will ever get a push like so many people want him to. Evan Bourne is freaking scary in the air man. We get the first tag for the faces as Hardy comes in. Less than 20 seconds later he tags Bourne back in and the Shooting Star puts out Ziggler.

In about 10 seconds Bourne is out to a double arm DDT. Did Striker just say Finlay vs. McIntyre has been lighting up Friday nights? That’s very stupid but I like Striker just for his references alone so there we are. Finlay and Sheamus stare each other down and Sheamus just jumps up with a bicycle kick. I LOVE THAT! He was just like screw this standing around nonsense and kicked the tar out of him to pin him.

We’re at 4-3 now if you were a bit confused. We keep hearing about Lawler and Sheamus and no one really cares as Jerry has come off like a jerk during this whole thing. Miz calls spots to Hardy which Striker uses the Billy Graham method of saying Miz is trash talking him to cover it up, which is a good idea if nothing else. Hardy is taking a beating here which is a tradition of Survivor Series. Even on the apron Morrison has such a great presence. You can’t teach something like that.

Does Matt have a single move that doesn’t work on the neck at all? Morrison got a POP. Something in me wants to see Swagger vs. Morrison in a long feud. That would just be awesome in my mind. Yeah I’m a Morrison mark now. The guy is just freaking awesome. The referee went down which apparently is a legit injury. Starship Pain, which is a sweet name if there ever has been one, ties us up. It’s Miz, Sheamus and McIntyre vs. Shelton, Hardy and Morrison.

Miz and Morrison could main event a small PPV someday. Shelton is freaking insane in the ring. Now if only they could get him a personality. Miz pins Shelton with the Breakdown which takes less time to type than the regular name. That right there is what Miz needs more than anything else: pins over more established stars. He’s viewed as a guy with limited credibility and the more wins he gets the faster that goes away and the faster he becomes a more complete wrestler.

Like it or not, he’s the real deal and he’s going to be around for awhile. I’m still undecided on McIntyre. He’s not bad, but I don’t see him as being as great as everyone says he is. If nothing else he uses a DDT so I can’t complain. He gets us down to 3-1 and I’m marking for Morrison here, despite knowing the ending.

Morrison of course gets his head handed to him as we get even more Rockers comparisons, which doesn’t work as both guys have potential to be somewhat big deals. Eventually the Razor’s Edge from Sheamus puts out Morrison, giving us three sole survivors as WWE makes my head shake more and more.

Rating: B. This was easily the best choice for the opener. The midcard gets a very solid push here which is what these matches can do better than anything else. The ending was very good also as it would have been unrealistic for Morrison o fight off all three at once. He should have gone down here and having it 3-1 keeps him credible. This was a solid match as the heels winning is just fine. This was very good and an excellent opener.

The black push continues as Christian is the only white guy on his team. Only this comes to mind:

The segment is funny if nothing else. Kofi without the accent has upped his credibility about 1000%. I still don’t buy everything that is said about Christian. I think that’s his biggest issue: his name. Christian. It just does nothing for me at all. I’d say that’s the main problem.

We recap Rey vs. Batista, which has to be the best heel turn in a good while. The angle sucks badly as they weren’t really best friends or anything or even close so the whole thing didn’t work. Anyway, let’s get to this as the package goes on way too long.

Rey Mysterio vs. Batista

This match has a no harm clause meaning that if Batista hurts him he can’t be sued, which more or less gives away the result. As I said in the LD, only WWE would have Batista’s first major heel match in his hometown where he’s going to get a massive pop. Ok, I’m sick of any and all references to Eddie. He passed away four years ago. Yes it was tragic. Yes he’s missed. STOP FREAKING MAKING ANGLES ABOUT HIM!!!

If you want to remember him fondly, stop using him as a prop. That’s absurd. Ok, so usually I write the reviews as the match goes, but based on what I read in the LD, this was a minute long squash. I have no idea where the whole part about not being able to respect Rey again came from. The way you guys were talking about it, Rey got less offense in than he did against Khali when he was world champion. This was perfectly fine.

In wrestling, you have to have a high level of suspension of disbelief. Rey as a credible main event guy is something that certainly falls under that category. There’s no reason to believe that he should have a chance against someone of Batista’s size. The thing is in this match, he got a TON of offense in. More or less Batista had to get his hands on Rey one time and the rest would be history. Rey got out of a ton of stuff and had Batista in trouble.

I seriously do not get where the squash thing is coming from. Batista is supposed to be an animal and he mauled Rey after he hit the first big move. Was Rey supposed to kick out of the Batista Bomb? He got a beatdown after a big power move. This was perfectly fine and there was nothing wrong with it. Rey has been beaten up before by people like Chavo Guerrero of all people and he came back fine from it. He’ll come back, likely at TLC and cost Batista the title. What was wrong here?

Rating: C+. The match itself was fine. It was short but it did its job very well. Honestly, what do you want from this match? It did everything it was supposed to do which mainly was getting Rey off of TV for awhile. It did that and allowed Batista to get a big boost as a monster heel. What more do you want here?

We jump to the back with Team Orton who might as well be called team losers here given the endings to the first two matches.

Promo for the Raw that aired last night which was quite good.

Team Orton vs. Team Kingston

Orton, Rhodes, DiBiase, Regal, Punk
Kingston, Christian, R-Truth, MVP, Mark Henry

The feuds are about as basic as you could think of here but that works fine here. We’re starting out with Henry vs. Orton. Please, make it quick. Henry is named the Chef of Hell’s Kitchen by Striker. I don’t get it. Striker goes on to point out that Orton is a Royal Rumble winner which could play into strategy here. Cole points out he’s a six time world champion as well. Ok, the Rumble thing makes a little sense I guess as both matches are about survival.

The world champion thing tells me one thing: titles change hands too often. No one mentions that Orton has been the sole survivor three times because that clearly has no effect on anything at all. Either way, an RKO takes Henry out in about a minute so at least he didn’t fill up the screen for too long. On paper this more or less should be Christian and Kofi again Punk and Orton.

Everyone else on those teams are more or less jobbers or midcard guys that aren’t going to do anything here. Thank goodness they didn’t call that move where Punk jumped and did a front flip over MVP a belly to belly suplex. At least they got that right. My boy hits a GTS to put Truth out, but does a very smart thing before doing it: he pulls Truth to his corner before going for the cover.

It’s little things like that which can make a wrestler be a step ahead of everyone else. It’s smart from a kayfabe perspective which so few people do yet. They’re really talking Kofi up here which is the best thing they could do. After a Killswitch misses, a pretty nice spinning sunset flip from the middle rope puts out DiBiase to make it 4-3.

Kofi comes in to a solid pop. If you haven’t seen it, take a look at the MSG fight between Kofi and Orton. It made Kofi’s career. Rhodes is called the Triforce of the Blue Eyed Bandit. I’m not sure if I like that or not. After a blind tag MVP hits what is actually a Mafia Kick on Regal for the pin to tie us up at 3. Striker is just on a higher level than Cole and King behind the mic.

There’s such a flow to him out there and he sounds completely comfortable. Ballin might be the most absurd move in wrestling since the People’s Elbow. IT’S A FREAKING ELBOW DROP!!! Thankfully Rhodes hits Cross Roads to put him out. That’s a major step for Legacy as having their own individual finishers sets them up for an eventual singles push. Think about all of the great teams that have split and all of them had singles moves to end matches with.

A Killswitch puts out Rhodes, and amazingly enough we’re down to a two on two match with the four biggest stars in this thing. Who would have seen that coming? From out of almost nowhere, Christian hits a Killswitch on Orton but Punk makes a save. Orton is up in about 15 seconds and Christian walks into an RKO to make it 2-1 with Punk and Orton against Kofi.

Punk gets him up for the GTS but because he kicks him feet he gets out. That’s all anyone has to do to get out of a move like that. The magical feet kicking knows no bounds. Orton hasn’t been in at all since it’s been one on one. Orton has an awesome silhouette. He just looks awesome standing there. If nothing else we’re getting a good Kofi vs. Punk match. I love what they’ve been doing with Kofi.

Instead of the way they built up Hardy who kept getting closer and closer but didn’t actually win, they’re having Kofi just rise up and start beating everyone he faces. I like that as it’s a different style to the push and it’s working very well. He catches Punk in a rollup and gets him. Orton walks in and almost immediately the Trouble In Paradise ends this. Kofi’s skyrocket push continues.

Rating: B+. Again, this was a very well done match. They knew what they were doing and it showed. They got rid of the six guys that meant nothing and got it down to what mattered. This match was designed to make Kofi look great again and they did just that. He pinned two men that within the last two months had been world champions completely clean. That’s a huge boost to Kofi and puts even more heat on Kofi vs. Orton. I loved this and it came off very well.

Don’t try this at home.

Smackdown World Title: Undertaker vs. Big Show vs. Chris Jericho

I’m really not big at all on the idea of having more or less the same match on both brands for the title, especially triple threats. Granted I don’t like triple threats anyway as it’s all about a gimmick that’s been done so many freaking times that it has lost any and all kinds of credibility it once may have had but again that’s neither here nor there.

Not to mention everything in this match turns into yet another formula match, which is one guy goes down and we have a one on one match, then repeat that with a different order of people. Naturally I could have written double this in the time Taker’s entrance takes. Yeah he’s still coming. I had a nice bowl of soup during his entrance.

It ticked me off that I was out of soup and had to get dressed and go to the store and get some soup and then come home and make it but at least I didn’t miss any of the match since Taker was 90% done with his entrance when I got back. Naturally, the match goes the formula direction for the majority of it. I’m not sold at all on splitting Show and Jericho already. They more or less are the tag division at this point, but granted last night on Raw they were announced to be fighting DX at TLC for the belts.

Again, I don’t like this as it’s two guys that won’t be together in 3 months because THEY ARE NOT A TAG TEAM. They’re singles guys with nothing else to do so let’s just throw them together again. They’re just kind of going through the motions here with near falls being broken up by the third guy every time.

That’s fine as it builds some drama, but at the same time it really doesn’t do much at all. It’s repetitive, which is never a good thing in a match. It’s not a bad match, but it’s not that interesting at all. Finally Jericho takes a shot to the head and Show goes into Hell’s Gate for the tap. Not wild on the ending but whatever.

Rating: C+. This was your run of the mill triple threat. Granted that might be because Show was in it and he just can’t do anything most of the time. What the heck happened to him? In WCW he was the MAN. Anyway, this wasn’t bad, but dang it went as by the book as you could ask for. I don’t think anyone believed Taker was dropping the belt here, but geez could they have been any less boring about it?

Josh Matthews, who should be thankful for having a job given that he’s completely worthless, is with the survivors of Team Miz who say they’re all great.

Face Divas vs. Heel Divas

McCool, Jillian, Beth Phoenix, Alicia Fox, Layla
Mickie James, Gail Kim, Kelly, Eve, Melina

How sad is it that I have no clue what show most of these girls are on? So Melina is champion yet Mickie is the captain. I hate these matches as all of four people care and it’s a T&A match. Yeah the girls look good, but that’s all there is to it. The matches are the same every year and next to nothing ever changes. Why are these girls feuding? No reason, other than some are faces and some are heels.

I am bored out of my mind with this match. Why am I supposed to care about any of these women? Kelly eliminates Layla to absolutely no reaction. McCool apparently disrespects AJ Styles by using his finishing move, despite AJ being known for all his other stuff more than that. That was so overblown it was ridiculous. Eve is just worthless in the ring and it’s pitiful. The thing is, she looks good in shorts and a tight top so she’s told she can wrestle.

She puts out Jillian as still no one really cares. Beth puts Eve out in a few seconds to get us down to 3-3. Kelly goes out despite her face never hitting the mat. Mickie and Beth botch a crucifix but it gets three anyway. We have Mickie and Melina vs. Alicia and McCool.

Alicia goes out due to a high level of suck so we’re down to 2-1 as McCool tries so hard to get people to care about her or accept her as anything but the vagina Taker gets off in. That’s an image I didn’t want. Finally after far too long of a match Melina beats McCool to end this mess.

Rating: D. This was, as usual, a waste of time. The wrestling is ok, but geez what is it going to take to get it through the heads of the writers that NO ONE CARES??? Seriously, when was the last time you saw the crowd into a Divas match for a reason other than what the girls looked like? The division is a joke and always will be a joke because there are no characters, there are no stories, and the champions are flavors of the month, except for a few here and there.

Mickie, the most talented one, is criticized for not being a stick but having some meat on her which makes her more realistic. That’s evil apparently, and again shows everything that’s wrong with the women in wrestling. Scratch that. Everything wrong with the division is better.

We recap Batista vs. Rey, despite the match already happening. It sets up Batista saying he’s not sorry.

Raw World Title: Shawn Michaels vs. HHH vs. John Cena

DX has gotten some heat for coming out together, and I can understand that. It makes it look like they don’t care about being champion, which is the point of the stupid match and being a wrestler in the first place but whatever. In a great moment, Shawn kicks HHH a few seconds into the match. I love that. He just made up for coming out with HHH as he says screw this guy, I want the title. That’s awesome.

This however creates a good thing and a bad thing, as we have the usual greatness that is Cena vs. Shawn, but it also sends us straight into another formula of a match, which is the last thing we need here after what we had earlier. Anyway we hit the floor after some good stuff, and as Cena is going to FU Shawn through a table, HHH is back for the save. He makes up for earlier and hits a spinebuster through the table with Shawn.

And yep, it’s formula time as it’s HHH vs. Cena in the ring while Shawn recovers. And after more good stuff there, we get the DX somewhat decent combustion. It of course ends with Cena and the STF, but Shawn gets a crossface instead. This is another ok match that is just pure formula stuff. It’s just take two guys, have them fight for three minutes then replace one guy.

Shawn kicks both guys, but HHH falls on Cena while Shawn falls outside for no apparent reason. We do get the always fun let’s go Cena, Cena sucks chants. I love those. FU to HHH as we’re in pure finishers/counters only. The problem with having double main events like these is that it keeps one from being the real main event.

It makes this match seem like less of something because we did it just 25 minutes ago. Just to further emphasize my point of only finishers at the end, Shawn kicks HHH for the third time and Cena hits an FU on Shawn to slam him into HHH for the pin.

Rating: C+. This was your run of the mill triple threat. This wasn’t bad, but dang it went as by the book as you could ask for. I don’t think anyone believed Cena was dropping the belt here, but geez could they have been any less boring about it? In case that looks familiar to you, it’s because it’s word for word the same as I put about the Smackdown title match but with Cena instead of Taker and the Big Show part edited out.

That’s because more or less it was the same thing but with different people in it. That’s the problem with these matches and booking like this: it’s repetitive, which makes it very boring, at least to me. The wrestling was fine given who you had in there, but MAN was it predictable.

Overall Rating: B-. This was a good show and that’s primarily because of one thing: the booking MADE SENSE. There is not one thing here where you have to scratch your head and wonder what they heck they were thinking. Everything went as it should have and it worked out well. Feuds were advanced, the right guys went over, no big names lost credibility, and some feuds were ended. What more could you ask for?

The one thing that you could ask for was a more creative way to have the title matches. I hate matches where it’s just the same thing that it’s always been but with different people which is what the world title matches were here. It’s a good show, but it won’t blow you away by any means.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

 

Survivor Series 2008
Date: November 23, 2008
Location: TD Banknorth Garden, Boston, Massachusetts
Attendance: 12,498
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Todd Grisham, Matt Striker, Jim Ross, Tazz

JR and Taz talk about the Hardy issue and say that ABC and TMZ picked up the story. I seem to remember that being a lie.

Team HBK vs. Team JBL

Shawn Michaels, Rey Mysterio, Cryme Tyme, Great Khali

John Bradshaw Layfield, The Miz, John Morrison, Kane, MVP

Shawn and JBL are feuding over Shawn being broke and needing money form JBL, Cryme Tyme (Shad Gaspard and JTG, two thug characters) are feuding with Miz and Morrison, Kane has been hunting Mysterio and Khali and MVP (in the middle of a massive losing streak that would result in a face turn and the US Title) are there to fill out the lineups. MVP and Mysterio get things going as all of the commentators are talking at once.

Team Raw vs. Team Smackdown

Raw: Beth Phoenix, Mickie James, Kelly Kelly, Candice Michelle, Jillian Hall

Smackdown: Michelle McCool, Victoria, Maria, Maryse, Natalya

Matt Hardy says that Jeff was hit in the back of the head with a blunt object, ending any drug speculation.

Undertaker vs. Big Show

Team Orton vs. Team Batista

Randy Orton, Mark Henry, William Regal, Cody Rhodes, Shelton Benjamin

Batista, Kofi Kingston, CM Punk, R-Truth, Matt Hardy

Punk immediately charges at Regal and hits the GTS for the elimination in about ten seconds. Shelton gets a very fast two on Punk before pounding away on his back. Off to Kofi who grabs a front facelock. Kofi is even more over here than usual as he went to college in Boston. Kofi tries a monkey flip but Shelton lands on his feet and brings in Henry to pound away slowly.

Batista immediately spears down Henry to make it 3-1 as Shelton comes in. Benjamin gets caught in a spinebuster almost immediately and the Batista Bomb gets is down to 2-1. Cody comes in and peppers Batista with some right hands before charging into a boot. Batista powerslams Rhodes down and says Orton is next. Batista hits the Bomb on Rhodes but Randy made a blind tag while Cody was in the air. The RKO gets the elimination and win for Rhodes and Orton.

Hardy is officially out of the title match tonight.

Smackdown World Title: Vladimir Kozlov vs. HHH

They trade arm holds on the mat and then trade even more arm holds on the same mat. Back up and HHH hits the high knee and a facebuster followed by the DDT for no cover. The fans chant for TNA before HHH hits the spinebuster. Kozlov counters the Pedigree and hits the headbutt to the chest to take HHH down. Vladimir sends HHH into the corner and out to the floor where very little happens.

Hardy – 57%

Triple Threat – 38%

Kozlov – 5%

Raw World Title: Chris Jericho vs. John Cena

Both guys head up to the top with Cena slamming him to the mat, followed up by the top rope Fameasser. Cena is all fired up now but Jericho breaks up the FU and hits a Codebreaker for a delayed two. Jericho takes over and hits a clothesline followed by an EVIL smirk. He smirks a bit too much though and Cena grabs the STFU. Cena has to try to pull the hold back to the middle of the ring and Jericho kicks him away. The champ tries a small package but Cena pulls him up into the FU for the pin and the title.

Cena celebrates to end the show.

Ratings Comparison

Team HBK vs. Team JBL

Original: B+

Redo: C

Team Raw vs. Team Smackdown

Original: D-

Redo: D

Undertaker vs. Big Show

Original: D+

Redo: D

Team Orton vs. Team Batista

Original: C-

Redo: B

Edge vs. HHH vs. Vladimir Kozlov

Original: D+

Redo: D

John Cena vs. Chris Jericho

Original: B

Redo: C+

Overall Rating

Original: C-

Redo: D+

I’ve flipped on the two male Survivor Series matches but other than that it’s about the same.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/11/17/history-of-survivor-series-count-up-2008-let-jericho-beat-cena-once-just-one-time/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Survivor Series 2008
Date: November 23, 2008
Location: TD Banknorth Garden, Boston, Massachusetts
Attendance: 14,500
Commentators: Matt Striker, Tazz, Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole

So here we are at the most recent Survivor Series. This show is built around one thing and one thing only: the return of John Cena. He was coming back from being hurt by Batista, so therefore he’s the #1 contender to Chris Jericho’s title. Considering this is in his hometown, the ending is pretty clear. On the Smackdown side we have the triple threat between HHH, Kozlov and allegedly Hardy, but this was the infamous stairwell angle that I’ve never gotten why it had such a huge backlash.

More on that later though. Anyway, Hardy isn’t there so we have a one on one match allegedly. There’s also three Survivor Series matches so that should be good. They’re going with longer matches this year, which I’m fine with. Let’s get to it and end this review series as even I’m fed up with this show at this point.

The intro is all about Cena and survival. No other matches are mentioned at all. Good to know that the company thinks so much of its other wrestlers. The theme song is by AC/DC though so I can’t really complain. We immediately start talking about the Hardy incident where they claim that ABC, CNN and TMZ have all talked about this.

That would surprise me, but I’d be more surprised if they would flat out lie like that on a live PPV. That’s something that’s a bit hard to cover up, so maybe those outlets did. TMZ I could certainly see doing it. Anyway, Ross’ voice sounds a bit off. Maybe he’s sick or something. Let’s get to it.

Team HBK vs. Team JBL

HBK, Cryme Tyme, Great Khali, Rey Mysterio
JBL, Miz, Morrison, MVP, Kane

The feuds here are pretty simple. HBK vs. JBL, the tag teams, Kane vs. Rey and MVP and Great Khali aren’t really feuding but they just didn’t have anything else to do. My goodness Lillian is gorgeous. How can you have multiple sole survivors? The money aspect of JBL vs. HBK hasn’t kicked off yet but they’re fighting a bit. These entrances are taking WAY too long. To say Rey is over is the understatement of the year.

MVP is in the middle of his big losing streak here that would ultimately make him a face. Miz and Morrison are just awesome, plain and simple. We start with MVP vs. Rey which should be a decent little match. If his partner didn’t suck so much, JTG would be a decent wrestler. He’s certainly the more talented member of his team, but dang he’s small. He’s also eliminated by a Drive By from MVP. He literally turns around and is hit by a Khali chop and pinned.

Well that’s a decent way to get rid of two guys I guess. It’s big on big now with Kane vs. Khali. The camera shot they use of looking up at them is really a cool looking thing. With an assist from Khali, Rey takes out Kane with a very high splash. We move on to Rey vs. Morrison here which should definitely be good.

The commentators are getting a lot of little verbal jabs in at each other which are at least being taken well. Good grief Shad is scary strong. Someone finally points out that Shad wears weird boots when he wrestles.

The commentators get into a long and weird debate/joke fest about 80s bands which makes no sense. They’re interrupted by Miz taking out Shad with a Reality Check. It’s 3-3 here as it’s HBK, Rey and Khali against Miz, Morrison and JBL. We get HBK vs. Miz which is a pretty cool match that I’d like to see more of. After JBL and Miz punch the heck out of HBK’s face, his eye is busted open a bit.

I would love to see Shawn vs. Morrison in a 20 minute match once. It would be awesome. Morrison starts using Shawn’s old moves, after having beaten him with a superkick on Raw this past week. That’s a cool angle when you think about it. After a long time of being in trouble, HBK makes the tag and Rey comes in. He goes completely human highlight reel and takes out Miz like he’s a jobber.

The you can’t wrestle chants kick off for JBL, which I’ve always thought was unfair. He’s a big power brawler. It wouldn’t make sense to have him do flips and technical stuff. It’s not in his nature. Rey has been held down his entire career? Really Grisham? He’s a former world champion, the greatest cruiserweight of all time and a surefire hall of fame guy. He’s really been held down. Morrison gets a nice counter to the bulldog move that Rey does.

I like it when people use counters to signature moves. It’s nice to see as it can’t be as hard as it’s implied. I don’t think it’s fair to say that JBL can’t wrestle, but dang his offense was pretty limited. Almost all he’s used are punches, clubbing blows and shoulder blocks. Throw out a powerbomb or a suplex or something buddy. Shawn comes in and after the nip up throws out a crotch chop to Morrison, foreshadowing the inevitable DX reunion number 18,000.

HBK and JBL go to the floor and fight it out resulting in JBL getting counted out but in a way that reminds me of a video game for some reason. Shawn almost walks into what would have been a SICK Sweet Chin Music from Morrison but naturally he ducks and kicks John’s head off for the pin and the victory.

Rating: B+. This was about as good of an opener as we were going to get. All of the eliminations made sense which is a lot more than I can say for some past matches. The feuds were kept alive which is the biggest thing you can ask for also. Everyone but JBL looked on their game out there and the result was solid. This is the epitome of a good Survivor Series match.

We go to the back where Eve, who is about to fall out of her top, is with HHH. HHH says that Jeff will be back, but tonight it’s HHH vs. Kozlov, which is what it should have been all along. HHH says that tonight is Kozlov’s first Survivor Series, his first title match, and his first loss. That’s a very short but good promo that hit exactly what it was supposed to do. There was a real chance that the Russian got the belt tonight, despite everyone on here knowing how much of a disaster that would have been.

Raw Divas vs. Smackdown Divas

Raw: Beth Phoenix, Mickie James, Kelly, Candice Michelle, Jillian
Smackdown: Michelle, Victoria, Maria, Maryse, Natalya

This is Survivor Series rules. Santino is with Beth here. The Divas are wearing their respective brands shirts which they all pull off. Yep, this is all about wrestling ability. Oh yeah Michelle and Beth are the respective champions here. Ok so more or less this is how the first few eliminations go: rollup, move, rollup, rollup, move. That’s the issue with the modern Divas.

So many of them win matches with nothing but rollups, which I can’t accept is due to anything other than a lack of knowing how to do anything else. That’s just sad. To be fair they’re not just school boys, but they’re all leverage moves or jackknife pins or something like that. That’s fine once in awhile but it eventually gets really old really fast. The Smackdown Divas keep arguing over who the captain is since Michelle is eliminated.

After that big rant, Jillian is taken out by a rollup. Within seconds a Northern Lights suplex takes out Maria. That’s another thing: the eliminations are coming WAY too fast. Seconds later, Maryse takes out Candice with an inverted figure four which in essence is a Sharpshooter where you sit on the leg instead of pulling on it. The final two are Beth and Maryse. Beth wins it with a big power move. This was just boring. Santino of course celebrates because he needs to validate his existence.

Rating: D-. This was just a waste of time. The eliminations were like 45 seconds apart, the moves were just repetitive, this accomplished nothing, and no one cared. That’s the main problems I can think of right now and I’m sure there were more in there. I don’t get why these matches happen. I guess to keep pests off of Vince’s back for doing swimsuit contests.

Matt Hardy says he doesn’t know what happened to Jeff. He knows that Jeff got hit in the head but that’s it.

We recap Taker vs. Big Show’s 10,387th feud which was exactly the same as it always had been. This time it’s a casket match. Big Show says Taker has no power over him. That more or less seals the ending of this match.

Big Show vs. Undertaker

Taker comes out first here to his mega entrance, which comes off as odd to me. Not the big entrance but that he comes out first. That’s just odd. Oh apparently that was just a group of random druids bringing the casket down. Yeah that’s just odd. I always love thinking about the druids getting lunch or something. It’s just amusing. Naturally the gong gets a bit pop.

This starts in the ring for about 12 seconds with most of that being Taker having the casket raised up. Immediately after that we’re on the floor with Show in control. I really don’t like these kinds of matches as they’re just so basic and simple that they’re not very interesting for the most part. Thankfully the ECW guys were allowed to leave.

I’ve always felt sorry for them having to sit out there all night long for a single match and then do nothing for the other two and a half hours but watch the show. Dang the announcers have nice chairs. A legdrop puts Show through the table because we’ve never seen that before. Hey we’re in the ring for a change! This is the big problem with feuds like this: we know Taker is going to win and that Show is just there to give Taker something to do until he’s back in the title hunt.

It gets old after awhile, but it’s kept Taker very fresh over the years so I can’t really complain. Show gets Taker down and has him in the casket but wants the referees to shut it, allegedly due to fear. Of course Taker pops up and starts his comeback. Ross calls Show a mastodon and before the word is out of his mouth he goes up for a Vader Bomb. It didn’t work but whatever.

Show gets out of the casket as apparently we need to do even more of the same stuff. The crowd is kind of into it but not really. They react to spots and that’s about all. With Taker down in the ring, Show tips the casket over and starts to leave. A wall of fire stops him and heeeeeeeere’s Taker. A bunch of druids bring out another casket as Taker is back up. They’re really making Show look strong here which is a good thing.

In something unique they stand the casket up. That’s new if nothing else. After the next ridiculous comeback from Taker, he beats on Show a bit and then Irish whips him into the standing casket which falls over and closes to end it. That was actually a cool ending but it got ZERO reaction. I mean no one did anything at all when it happened.

Rating: D+. This was a waste of time. No one cared, mainly due to who was in it. There was no reason at all to watch this and it was just boring. These two have fought so many times and had so many boring matches that there’s just no reason to watch it. The ending was cool if nothing else, which is why it passes.

Buy Armageddon! We promise it won’t suck!

The Colons hit on the Bellas, who are indeed hot despite what some would like you to believe. Of all things, the Gobbledygooker comes in. I wish I was making that up. They think it’s Charlie Haas, but he walks up. It’s the Boogeyman.

Team Orton is in the back. Orton says he’d rather be fighting Jericho, leading to him and Cody arguing. Legacy hadn’t started yet but it was coming very soon.

Team Batista vs. Team Orton

Batista, Matt Hardy, CM Punk, Kofi Kingston, R-Truth
Orton, Rhodes, Shelton Benjamin, Regal, Mark Henry

No recap here, which more or less is the case because there’s very little story. The main thing here is about Orton and Batista. Orton put Batista out with a punt a few months earlier and is ticked off about it, leading to this. Punk and Kofi are tag champions here in the middle of their completely forgotten title reign that would end at the hands of Miz and Morrison soon after this. Matt is the ECW Champion here, in the middle of a pretty good feud with Mark Henry.

As for the other guys, there’s really nothing here. The Draft would change a lot around in 5-6 months, but until then there was just not a lot going on in the midcard. This match really was just kind of thrown together and there wasn’t a lot there for it. Rhodes has Manu with him here. The two of them and DiBiase had been trying to get Orton to join them but that wouldn’t happen for about two more months, forming Legacy.

Oh and Regal is IC Champion here, but he would lose it to Punk very soon. Speaking of Punk, he hits the GTS on Regal inside of 15 seconds to take him out. I’m assuming an injury or something like that there, but whatever. Kofi and Shelton get in there and just tear the place up for a few seconds. Truth really does have a cool look to him. Striker says that he’s making a killing here, which is amusing. The crowd is more or less dead here.

The announcers make sure to let us know that Orton vs. Batista is about Evolution. How can the feuds that came from a stable last longer than the stable itself did? I’ve never gotten that. Oh I think Shelton and R-Truth are having a mini feud here but no one really cared about it.

Like I said the feuds here were more or less thrown together and meant nothing at all. Oh I do remember R-Truth and Shelton. I watched them at a house show for the US Title. It more or less sucked. Shelton is US Champion here in case I forgot to mention that.

Truth is just sloppy. He walks into Paydirt though and it’s tied at 4. Kofi comes in off the top and Striker says the Jamaican is getting high. That’s just amusing. MVP would soon turn face and take the belt from Shelton, although not until just before Mania. Orton comes in and the match just slows down so much it’s insane. The second rope DDT takes out Kofi.

I would have thought the hair would absorb a lot of the impact there. Punk and Orton never got the match or angle that they should have after Orton cost him the world title at Unforgiven. That’s a shame as they would have had a great feud I think, or at least a great match or two. Naturally Punk was given a big thing of nothing like the tag titles. Granted he won the IC Title very soon, breathing some life back into it.

He would also get the MITB and world title again, so maybe I have no idea what I’m talking about. In what can only be called a shocker, Rhodes hits a DDT on Punk for the clean pin which has to be the biggest win of his career. I get the potential in him, but eventually he has to actually do something with it, and the same is true of DiBiase. We’re on to Henry vs. Hardy with the former slamming the heck out of Hardy to take him out.

Less than ten seconds later Henry is speared out by Batista. It’s 3-1 now in case you were wondering. We have Batista against Shelton, Rhodes and Orton. The Batista Bomb on Shelton makes is what would become Legacy vs. Batista. Dave runs through Rhodes but a quick tag from Orton saves him.

Despite Orton gyrating and jumping up and down waiting on Batista to turn around, the Animal doesn’t hear him. The RKO ends this, setting up the complete throw away match between Batista and Orton at Armageddon. Remember that match? I didn’t think so.

Rating: C-. I didn’t really like it. I liked Orton winning the way he did, but the whole thing went too fast. It wasn’t bad for sure, but it certainly wasn’t anything great. The complete lack of feuds hurt things a lot here too. Having so many people that had nothing to do with the main feud or anything like it hurt things. It was ok, but not great.

Kozlov says something that was supposed to be English I think. Never mind it’s Russian.

We recap the three way feud, despite Hardy not being here tonight. I would recap it, but it means nothing since Jeff isn’t wrestling and he’s the focus of the package.

WWE Title: Vladamir Kozlov vs. HHH

We get a bell for the introductions and a bell for the actual match, so technically the match was paused for the majority of the action. That joke has long since passed being funny. Naturally the USA chants start up. Within seconds the fans are chanting boring. More on that later. They’re doing a very mat based technical style here with some submission stuff. The we want Hardy chant is going strong for about 12 seconds.

A TNA chant starts up as they speed up the pace a bit. It’s not bad, but it’s a different style that I don’t think a lot of the people are into at all. It’s really not that bad. HHH is fighting a guy that’s never lost so he’s afraid to use his best stuff. He’s feeling out Kozlov at first to avoid making mistakes. What’s so weird about that? It’s a thinking man style from the Cerebral Assassin.

Why is that bad? I really don’t like the way Scott Armstrong counts. He’s the blonde referee that has that hitch in his count. It’s so annoying. This goes on for awhile, and while it’s kind of boring, it’s certainly not bad. From out of nowhere, HHH gets a Pedigree. He gets ready to cover him, but Vickie appears on the stage, saying that it will be a triple threat and that he’s here!

Naturally it’s not Jeff but rather the returning Edge. He hits a spear on HHH but Jeff runs out and beats up Edge. Ok wait, hang on a second. Jeff was ok to do the run in (this if from kayfabe mind you) but couldn’t wrestle? I thought he was supposed to be extreme or whatever. That makes little sense. Anyway, Jeff hits HHH and Kozlov with a chair but gets speared. Edge covers HHH and wins the freaking title again.

Rating: D+. This is going to be a long rating. Ok, so the match was pretty boring. Was it bad though? Not really. There was indeed a story there though as I outlined earlier on. Kozlov is supposed to be this master fighter and grappler, so what did he do you ask? He used a bunch of grapples and submission holds to wear down HHH. In other words, he did what his gimmick called for him to do.

HHH was wrestling smart, so he did what his gimmick called for him to do. The Edge twist felt cheap, but it’s nothing that he hasn’t done a dozen times or so already. However, Dave Meltzer of the Wrestling Observer Newsletter called this the worst match of the year. That my friends, is nonsense. The Divas match earlier was light years worse than this.

I would say that’s Meltzer simply continuing his quest to make WWE and Vince seem like the scum of the earth because for some reason he hates them both. He also called the Hardy angle the most tasteless of the year. This is one that I just do not get. Ok, let’s see. The reason the angle was considered in poor taste was Jeff’s past drug issues.

Tell me two things: when was it ever mentioned on WWE television that Jeff had drug issues, and when was it ever mentioned that this incident was drug related? Dang on the freaking broadcast they said he was hit on the head and attacked. It was an angle, nothing more. The drug thing was never mentioned once other than by people on the internet, but of course this is just so tasteless.

We’ll have Vickie Guerrero live off of Eddie’s name and make out with every guy under the freaking sun, but an angle that for all of 16 hours came close to hinting that Jeff might have had a relapse without ever saying it and clearing it up later that night was tasteless? Give me a break. It can be implied that Vince has slept with everything on the face of the earth and has a bastard midget son, but that’s not tasteless.

Women are flat out sex objects and nothing more, but that’s not tasteless. So it’s ok to do all that stuff, but having Jeff Hardy be found unconscious without ever saying what might have happened until on the show where they say he was attacked by a person and not an illegal substance is reprehensible? That’s the most hypocritical thing I’ve ever heard. If Jeff had another relapse, they wouldn’t have mentioned him being found out cold. Vince isn’t that stupid.

This reeked of angle the minute it broke at like 2:30 am the night before a PPV, but of course, it was tasteless right? Give me a freaking break. This is what gives the IWC a bad name: people making a huge deal about absolutely nothing at all when it was so clearly an angle. I said that the night it happened. I said it because it was obvious, but apparently Dave “he is risen again” Meltzer thinks otherwise, so it must be true right?

It doesn’t matter though as he’s barely a wrestling reporter anymore. Sorry I really can’t stand that guy. He does what all of us do and makes a fortune off of it. I’m sure someone will yell at me and tell me how brilliant he is, but no, not really. He’s good, but overrated. Ok, rant over for now at least.

Oh and it was revealed that Matt, Jeff’s brother, was behind everything. Jeff would win the title the next month in a freaking shocker anyway.

We jump from that to a recap of Jericho and Cena, which wasn’t really a feud but WWE kept trying to convince us of that anyway. Jericho had stolen the title at Unforgiven but as soon as Cena was announced as returning, the inevitable was clear. Oh and Batista got the world title for a week for no apparent reason in between. That’s about it.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Chris Jericho

The ending here is about as obvious as you could imagine. Cena’s pop is massive here. They try to make it sound like Cena has been out for a year when it’s been about three months or less. Jericho works on the neck, which here at least makes sense. I get it three months after an injury, but when they reference it a year and a half later, it loses its effect quite a bit. This is really formula based stuff but it’s working ok.

Cena has an early flurry and then Jericho takes over for the majority of the match, working the neck as much as he can. There’s nothing wrong with that as it’s the same thing that worked for Hogan for years if not decades. Jericho’s three finishers all hit and of course none of them work. This is the longest match of the night but it’s likely going to have the least amount said about it. There’s little drama here and after that initial pop, the crowd has been ok at best.

This crowd has completely sucked all night long. Naturally, Cena survives everything and hits the massive FU to get the title back despite Jericho hitting everything he could on him. That closes the show, which is exactly what it should have been.

Rating: B. This was good enough. There was zero drama, but they didn’t bury Jericho. Cena certainly should have won as Jericho was just keeping the title warm for him for awhile anyway. There’s nothing wrong with that. Jericho was a horrible champion anyway and always has been, so this wasn’t a big deal at all. Cena was clearly going to win, and sometimes that’s how shows should end.

Overall Rating: C-. This had its moments, but overall it’s just not that great. With six matches you run the risk of messing up on one or two of them and screwing the whole show up which I think is what this show did. Having Hardy be pulled probably wasn’t the smartest thing in the world as I guess they didn’t want to take the spotlight away from Cena. I get that, but it’s still a good bit of a bait and switch which is the most annoying thing that a promoter can do.

It’s not as bad as Randy vs. Jake in 91, but it’s far from good. Anyway, this wasn’t a great show at all and it pales in comparison to 07. Still, it’s not awful, but it’s certainly not worth going out of your way to see. Not really recommended.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

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