IMG Credit: WWE.com

Monday Night Raw
Date: January 19, 2004
Location: Resch Center, Green Bay, Wisconsin
Attendance: 6,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the go home show for the Royal Rumble and that means one final push for Shawn Michaels vs. HHH, which is always going to get more attention than the match the show is named after. Hopefully it’s a little better than last week’s build which droned on and on without actually adding anything. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Coach is in the back with a bunch of wrestlers who will be in the Royal Rumble on Sunday. Since he’s in charge tonight, Coach is going to have a battle royal tonight with the winner getting the number thirty spot. However, you have to qualify for the battle royal by winning your regular matches tonight. If there is any interference, you’re out of the Rumble entirely. Reason #1 why Coach is better at this than Bischoff: this took less than three minutes rather than the ten it would have likely taken Bischoff in the arena.

Opening sequence.

Booker T./Rob Van Dam vs. Christian/Matt Hardy

The Matt Facts are back and it turns out that he loves Mongolian BBQ’s and his counter tops are all granite. That could help for future gifts. Rob flips over Matt to start and scores with a spinning kick to the face for an early two. Booker comes in to punch Christian a bit and a backdrop makes things even worse. A trip from the floor lets Matt pull Booker outside for a beating, allowing Christian to grab the neck crank. Makes sense after the Tombstone last week. Matt comes in with a neck crank of his own as JR and King critique Booker’s rap song.

The fans tell Christian that he sucks and they seem very pleased when Booker kicks him out of the air. Van Dam comes in off the hot tag and a standing moonsault gets two on Matt. Rolling Thunder hits knees though and Matt puts his feet on the ropes for two of his own. The villains try a double backdrop so it’s a double ax kick from Booker, setting up the Five Star to give Van Dam the pin on Matt, putting Booker and Van Dam in the battle royal.

Rating: C-. Just a quick match to put some fan favorites into the main event tonight. Christian and Matt are a pretty random team but it’s not like Booker and Van Dam have anyone else of note to beat. Granted it’s not like the match means anything as it’s all about the main event anyway so it’s hard to get too annoyed.

Remember how WWE hyped up Goldberg vs. Scott Steiner last week? Well now Test has been added to make it a triple threat.

Chris Jericho vs. Rene Dupree

Coach is on commentary. Dupree gets in an early hiptoss to set up the French dancing, only to have the fans start up a Jericho chance. Dancing haters. Jericho dropkicks him outside but Dupree dropkicks him out of the air back inside. They exchange abdominal stretches and more dancing just annoys Jericho. He knocks Dupree away and does his own dance, setting up the bulldog into the Lionsault. Dupree’s knees are up and a Death Valley Driver gets two. Not that it matters as the Walls make Dupree tap without much trouble so we’ll see Jericho later tonight.

Rating: C. It’s kind of amazing how much better Dupree is when he has someone like Jericho out there to walk him through a match. Believe it or not, one of the best of all time is capable of putting anyone into a good match and that’s what happened here. Jericho’s face turn is starting to take hold and that should be a good thing going forward.

The Friends and Supporters of Mick Foley air their Foley isn’t a hardcore legend ad, which is still funny.

Christian asks Jericho to use his Survivor Series favor to get into the battle royal but that’s not happening. That sounds like something that’s going to matter later.

Video on HHH vs. Shawn Michaels, who used to be best friends but then HHH became all evil. Then they had a long feud with some traded wins and then Shawn pinned him on the last Raw of the year but it didn’t count. Now we’re having a Last Man Standing match. Now why does that need such a long recap?

Rico vs. Mark Henry

Rico wastes no time in spanking Mark and even throws in a kiss to Teddy Long. Back in and Henry runs him over, setting up the nerve hold. Rico fires up with some kicks but misses something off the top. The World’s Strongest Slam sends Henry to the battle royal.

Flair gives Evolution a pep talk for Sunday.

Classic Royal Rumble moment: Maven eliminates Undertaker in 2002.

Kane vs. Spike Dudley

Spike tries to come off the top and gets choked a lot. More choking in the corner has the referee pulling Kane off so Spike shoves the referee, who thinks Kane did it. That’s a DQ to send Spike to the battle royal.

Kane wrecks Spike post match.

House show videos.

Goldberg vs. Scott Steiner vs. Test

Test gets double teamed to start and the beatdown is on in a hurry. A double clothesline drops Test and Steiner and Goldberg punches away at Steiner in the corner. Test gets in a cheap shot from the floor though and Steiner gets two off a belly to belly suplex. There’s a double suplex to Goldberg but he avoids a clothesline, which hits Steiner instead.

The gorilla press powerslam plants Steiner but draws Test back in for the save. Test and Steiner argue over who gets to pin Goldberg until Steiner sends Test outside. A hot shot sets up the Steiner Recliner, only to have Test break it up. The spear and Jackhammer end Test, putting Goldberg in the battle royal.

Rating: D. Pick a triple threat that follows the exact same formula that we’ve seen dozens of times. There was no need to make this a triple threat but if it was to protect us from having to see Steiner go one on one, he can’t get out of here fast enough. Also, what would it say if Test is brought in to protect you?

We get a new Mick Foley ad, calling him a coward and a scared little girl. Randy Orton is a fearless superstar though.

Austin watches the ad, shakes his head, and rides through the back on the ATV very fast, nearly running over Mark Jindrak and Garrison Cade.

Wrestlemania recall: the Brawl for All with the hilarious Bart Gunn knockout.

Here’s Austin for a chat. Austin gets straight to the point: Foley walked out of the company and then wouldn’t come fifteen minutes to the arena last week. That’s not the Foley that Austin knows and used to ride up and down the road with every night. They used to take the cheapest rental cars to the cheapest hotel rooms where they used to see who could make Diamond Dallas Page crack first. That’s not the Foley that Austin remembers so he wants Foley at the Rumble to beat up Orton once and for all. Austin toasts Foley, hoping that he’ll do the right thing.

Video on the launch party for the Originals CD. I could see the appeal of getting to meet Austin, Jericho and Trish among others.

Molly Holly and Trish get catty until Christian takes Molly’s place. He and Jericho had a great time last week on the road trip and Christian has some pictures on his phone to prove it. Jericho seemed to have some fun with a few good looking women. Trish was the last thing on his mind. Christian looks at his phone one more time, reminding him of the midgets.

Lita vs. Jazz

Not a battle royal qualifying match. The fans are already cheering for Lita so Jazz takes her down to the mat for some crossface shots. A monkey flip into some right hands have Jazz in trouble but she gets in a dropkick to the back of the head. Jazz’s chinlock doesn’t last long as the announcers ignore the match to talk about Foley. A spinning belly to back suplex sets up the reverse Twist of Fate but Long offers a distraction so Jazz can roll her up (with tights) for the pin.

Rating: D. That finish is getting very old and I don’t see things getting much better in the women’s division anytime soon. The fact that I saw Molly with the title about ten minutes ago and couldn’t remember who the champion was isn’t a good sign. They’re just going from feud to feud with no apparent direction and that gets old.

Hurricane is used to being the underdog and he’ll do it again tonight. He believes in himself though and that’s going to take him to the main event of Wrestlemania. That was a fired up promo.

We recap Foley not showing up last week.

Randy Orton vs. Hurricane

Non-title. Orton wastes no time in pounding Hurricane in the back, followed by a heck of a clothesline for two. A dropkick sets up a cravate but Hurricane fights up with a quick clothesline. Something like a reverse neckbreaker gets two on Orton and the high crossbody is good for the same. And never mind as the RKO ends Hurricane, wrapping up a short match with a lot packed in.

Post match Evolution comes out to gloat so Rosey comes in to keep an eye on his friend. The beatdown is on so the Dudleys make the real save but Orton saves Flair from going through a table. Coach comes in to yell and goes through it instead.

Henry talks trash to Jericho, who accuses him of eating moose vomit. Those are fighting words, with Henry promising to leave his “stank” on Trish. Henry: “And my stank smells good.”

Battle Royal

Rob Van Dam, Booker T., Goldberg, Chris Jericho, Randy Orton, Mark Henry

Spike is injured so we’re down to six men instead. Goldberg wastes no time in cleaning house until everyone gets together to beat him down. That includes a Five Star Frog Splash but Booker dumps Van Dam. Jericho gets rid of Booker seconds later, leaving Jericho and Orton to both skin the cat. Henry starts throwing people around and knocks Goldberg down but can only send Jericho to the apron.

A missile dropkick puts Henry down and Jericho dropkicks Goldberg’s knee out for good measure. Orton and Henry get together to toss Jericho and we’re down to three. Goldberg tries to fight back and spears Henry down but Orton makes the save. Instead Orton tries to do it himself so Goldberg knocks Henry out with a hard shoulder. Cue the rest of Evolution so Goldberg throws Orton onto the two of them for the win.

Rating: D-. Yeah that was pretty bad, with the win basically guaranteeing that you have no chance to win on Sunday. Goldberg is a good enough choice for the final spot as he can come in and wreck a few people before someone throws him out in the setup to a big angle. This was little more than a formality, though Orton did feel like he had a chance of winning.

Overall Rating: C. This was almost a stand alone show and it was very smart to not have Shawn Michaels and HHH on the show. There’s no need to waste time on that match after we spent so much time on it last week. The Rumble itself needed some build and it got the focus tonight, making this a better show than recent weeks but still nothing great.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of the NXT The Full Sail Years Volume III (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/05/25/new-book-nxt-the-full-sail-years-from-dallas-to-new-orleans/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: January 12, 2004
Location: Nassau Veterans Memorial Coliseum, Uniondale, New York
Attendance: 6,100
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Jonathan Coachman

We’re closing in on the Royal Rumble and we’re finally starting to talk about the thing. Last week saw the first few names officially announced for the Royal Rumble match and we also have Shawn Michaels vs. HHH confirmed in a Last Man Standing match. Hopefully we get some more stuff added to the card, just to flesh things out a bit. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Coach comes out for commentary because we’re just that lucky.

Trish Stratus/Lita vs. Jazz/Molly Holly

Trish goes after Jazz on the floor, leaving Lita to monkey flip Molly to start things off. Jazz comes in instead and gets suplexed down, only to have Molly pull Lita off the top. Another distraction lets Molly work on the arm but Jazz isn’t interested in some double teaming, mainly due to their issues last week. I can always go for some continuity, even in small doses.

Jazz misses a splash and it’s off to Trish for the first time. Everything breaks down in a hurry and it’s a headlock takeover to Molly/headscissors to Jazz, followed by a spinebuster (a rarity from Trish) for two. Lita and Molly head to the floor but Theodore Long offers a distraction so Jazz can grab a rollup with tights for the pin.

Rating: D+. They were starting to get somewhere and then we had the same ending that happens far too often around here. The division still needs some fresh blood (Did Gail Kim fall into a hole or something?) and having these four fight again isn’t what’s going to make things any better.

Post match Long grabs Trish by the hair, drawing in Chris Jericho and Mark Henry for the save and beatdown.

Here’s Matt Hardy (oh yeah he’s on Raw) for a chat. Matt isn’t happy with everyone trying to steal his spotlight over the years and now Steve Austin is doing it too. Cue Austin on the ATV (with JR getting in the second usage of “Monday Night Raw is where you come to break the rules”, the new slogan, of the night) to make a lot of noise.

Austin talks about being here to enforce the law, which isn’t happening if you’re just getting beaten up. Now someone coming out here and running his mouth about getting nowhere, that’s breaking the law. He’s ready to beat Hardy up right now but Hardy wants fresh competition, and he’s wrestled Austin before. Austin: “I oughta write you a ticket for impersonating a wrestler.” Austin issues an open challenge for someone Matt has never faced before and it’s time for a match.

Matt Hardy vs. Bill Goldberg

Didn’t Eric Bischoff deactivate Goldberg for a while? Matt tries to jump him and gets shoved down for his efforts as JR recaps Goldberg being deactivated. A pumphandle suplex sends Hardy flying but he’s right back with a Side Effect for two. The Twist of Fate is countered into a gorilla press and the spear/Jackhammer complete the destruction.

Post match Goldberg says he’s in the Royal Rumble. That’s the kind of name you need to be announced so good move.

In the back, Bischoff rants about Austin bringing Goldberg back but Austin says Bischoff never officially filed the paperwork to get rid of Goldberg. Well that’s quite the weak loophole. Bischoff relents but Austin can’t make matches going forward. I’m sure.

The Friends and Supporters of Randy Orton air the same ad from last week.

Orton has a seat waiting for Mick Foley in the front row if he’s willing to come the fifteen minutes from his house to the arena. Tonight can server as an example for what Foley can expect if he ever dares to come after Orton again.

D-Von Dudley vs. Batista

Batista wastes no time in jumping D-Von as JR talks about how unfair it is that Batista and Ric Flair are Tag Team Champions. A few shots to the head set up a suplex and a chinlock as Batista running a match isn’t the best idea in the world at this point. D-Von comes back with a jumping elbow and the top rope headbutt. It seems to have banged him up as well though and the Batista Bomb ends D-Von as Bubba and Flair fight on the floor.

Rating: D-. Can we really not just get two jobbers to be fed to Flair and Batista here instead of this one member vs. one member formula? D-Von isn’t exactly great on his own and Batista isn’t ready for a match like this, though at least he found something else to do besides the spinebuster and Batista Bomb. Just find a better way to advance feuds.

Orton is still waiting for Foley to arrive so he’s going to send a limo for him.

Long comes up to Jazz and Henry to explain how Bischoff set him up last week (“typical white man”) because he didn’t say how much power Austin really had around here. To make up for it, Henry gets Jericho later tonight.

Scott Steiner comes up to Goldberg and brings up their history in WCW. Steiner is in the Rumble as well and they’re fighting next week. Methinks this is a rare instance of WCW doing it far better.

Coach is in the ring to emcee a sitdown interview between HHH and Shawn Michaels. After Coach praises HHH and mocks Shawn during their entrances, we’re ready to go. Hang on a second though as Shawn throws the furniture out because this is man to man. Coach gets to the first topic of the DX days, which Shawn doesn’t seem interested in talking about. HHH says Shawn saw him as a sidekick but Shawn says they were equals.

That’s called out as nonsense (as it should be) and they get in an argument over who carried the wagon more. Shawn carried it until a broken back stopped him (and Steve Austin taking his place) but HHH carried it as soon as Shawn wasn’t there to take the spotlight. Apparently Shawn came back for reasons that HHH can never understand but HHH does understand: it was jealous because Shawn had to prove that he was the better man.

That brought them right here to this arena where Shawn proved that he was the better man in a street fight. HHH says Shawn won but got carried out while HHH was on his feet. This has always been about who is the best and it’s coming full circle again. HHH says he’s the ultimate student of this game and he’s studied everyone. Shawn is at the top of the list and there are only a few people who can be up there with him. As good as he is though, HHH is that much better.

That brings us to the title (after spending seven minutes arguing about everything else), which some people say either of them should hold. That ends at the Rumble and it might come down to just one second. All it’s going to take is one second for HHH to prove that he’s the champion and the best. Shawn likes that one second idea and superkicks Coach to show how fast it can be. As usual with HHH’s big promos, this was much longer and slower than it needed to be and didn’t tell us much of anything that we didn’t already know. You don’t have to sell HHH vs. Shawn this hard and they could have used this time better elsewhere.

And now, an ad for Heat. Ok then.

Booker T. vs. Kane

Booker has the bad hip hop version of his theme, which is just him saying catchphrases to a beat. Kane gets aggressive to start and clotheslines Booker in the corner but gets kicked in the face. More kicks are countered with a good crotching and Kane sends him into the steps…for a DQ.

Post match Kane stays on him but misses a chair shot. He settles for a Tombstone instead.

Another anti-Foley ad questions his status as a hardcore legend, showing clips of his comedy stuff. These things have been funny.

Foley still isn’t here.

Mark Henry vs. Chris Jericho

Henry has Long and Jazz in his corner. Jericho goes right up to him and is forearmed in the back for his efforts. A missed charge puts Henry on the floor and a baseball slide rocks him down again. Henry gets in a whip to the steps but Jericho sends him into the corner back inside. The missile dropkick gets two with the kickout powering Jericho way off. Henry bends him back first over the knee for a bit before switching to a bearhug.

Jericho slips out and dropkicks the knee but the Walls are quickly broken up. The bulldog literally pulls Henry’s hair out but Jazz grabs Jericho’s foot to stop the Lionsault. That earns her a beating from an invading Trish and Jericho somehow gets the Walls. The women get in the ring so the referee misses Henry tapping, which of course draws Long to the apron. Jericho lets go and it’s the World’s Strongest Slam to give Henry the pin.

Rating: D+. Henry is getting watchable after a few weeks of practice as he’s just there to stand in one place and show off the power while the smaller and more talented wrestlers do most of the work. That’s a good place for Henry and as long as they treat him like a monster, he can be a useful human.

Post break Christian yells at Jericho for wasting his time on Trish and says they’re going to hit up the town tonight and get her off his mind. They leave and Trish comes in, looking upset that she missed him.

Evolution is talking about Foley when Austin runs up on the ATV. In tonight’s main event, they better leave Orton alone in the main even. They don’t seem to buy it so Austin chases them with the ATV before stopping to spin in circles.

Foley still isn’t here.

Intercontinental Title: Randy Orton vs. Rob Van Dam

Van Dam is challenging and makes the mistake of chasing Orton, who stomps him back to the floor. That’s fine with Rob, who is right back in with a spinwheel kick to put Orton on the floor this time. Orton gets posted and looks a bit dead before coming up with a busted forehead. Rob hits the spinning kick to Orton’s back, knocking him into the empty chair….as the limo pulls up in the back.

We come back from a break with Orton in control in the corner and shoving Van Dam off the top for a heck of a crash into the barricade. Back in and Orton keeps him down with a bodyscissors, including some growling trash talk. As you might expect, the fans want Foley but have to settle for Van Dam elbowing Orton in the face. Orton is right back with an over the shoulder backbreaker into a neckbreaker (I’ve always liked that move) and it’s off to a reverse chinlock with a knee in the back.

It’s back to the bodyscissors but this time Orton spices it up a bit by ripping at Van Dam’s face. Good grief that thing has been on for almost five minutes now. Do something else. Rob fights up and gets two off a northern lights suplex. A springboard kick to the face seems to completely miss but a camera angle bails them out (which doesn’t happen nearly as often these days).

Rolling Thunder and a springboard moonsault give Rob two each (in case you thought Orton did those things) but Orton knees him in the face. There’s the ref bump and the low blow cuts Van Dam down. Orton then lays down and yells at the referee to wake up before trying the RKO. I have no idea what the point of the laying down was but Rob uses the delay to kick Orton in the face. He gets crotched on top though and the hanging DDT from the top retains the title.

Rating: D+. This really was longer than it needed to be with the bodyscissors dragging the match out and the ref bump going nowhere. Van Dam should be done as a challenger now and that clears the way for whatever they have to do to get us to Foley vs. Orton. That’s Van Dam’s best role in the company: a short term champion who can lose the title to a hot prospect heel and give them a rub in a rematch.

Foley never showed up and we didn’t see who was in the limo.

Overall Rating: D. It’s another night with the heels dominating as Jericho, Booker T. and Van Dam all losing and the Foley tease going nowhere. Oh but we did get a LONG chat between Shawn and HHH, which is what the world was waiting for. They’re adding a few names into the Rumble but they’ve done a rather boring job of getting us there. At least we still have Austin vs. Bischoff, no matter what Austin’s new official job title is. Bad, dry show here as the heels continue to run everything.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of the NXT The Full Sail Years Volume III (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/05/25/new-book-nxt-the-full-sail-years-from-dallas-to-new-orleans/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: 2001

Again, this is a very old review so I apologize for the lower quality.

Insurrextion 2001
Date: May 5, 2001
Location: Earls Court, London, England
Attendance: 15,784
Commentators: Michael Cole, Paul Heyman

So it’s a month after Mania X7 here and we’re back in England. This is a double request in a way as I was asked to do British PPVs as well as this show in particular so there you are. We’re in the two man power trip era here as the main event is HHH and Austin vs. Undertaker for the title which is more complicated than it should be.  There’s also the Queen’s Cup which is a fictitious title for this show only. This is 2001 WWF. Do you need more explanation than that? The Alliance hasn’t started yet so this should be good. Let’s get to it.

We open with Commissioner Regal saying the whole card has been changed. Vince comes in and says that Regal is doing stuff he’s not allowed to do. Regal says he didn’t do that. Vince says he didn’t do that. Apparently Linda did all this stuff. Linda of course pops up behind Vince as he’s ranting about everything. This segment goes on way too long. After five minutes, we’re ready to open the show.

What an odd commentary team.

Grandmaster Sexay vs. Eddie Guerrero

This is Grandmaster’s final appearance with the company for reasons of suck I guess. Eddie lost the European Title to Matt Hardy of all people. It’s not like being European meant anything with only Regal and Bulldog being European. Eddie would be gone soon for drugs anyway so there we are. This is a very hot crowd with one Phoenix being in attendance. Yeah he was the other request.

Eddie doing the Sexay dance is hilarious to say the least. I think Eddie was supposed to be champion here as he lost it like a week earlier. Grandmaster, how do you suck so much? Your dad is a legend and you’re just a freaking joke. And that’s being nice. He’s like an annoying indy gimmick that isn’t sure what his gimmick is.

The crowd is ALL OVER Eddie. That’s not bad. Grandmaster misses a…something and gets rolled up with Eddie using the ropes to win from nowhere. That was really abrupt.

Rating: D+. Uh what the heck was that? Seriously it felt like it was 3 minutes short or something. Also, why were these two in a singles match?  It’s very random but that’s what you get on these shows.  Not the worst, but an odd choice.

HHH is with Stephanie. She cannot act. They’re tag champions here too. He talks about the main event. Yeah that’s it.

Dean Malenko/Terri/Perry Saturn vs. Hardcore Holly/Crash Holly/Molly Holly

Uh…yeah. See what I mean when I say these cards had a tendency to feel thrown together? Terri is someone I rarely get the appeal of. Outside of her looks, what’s the point?  Ah ok Terri isn’t going to wrestle. Got it. Yeah I don’t care either. The Hollies get a pop.  Molly of course beats up Terri for a bit to a big pop.

Ok so it’s Hardcore and Saturn to start. Paul calls Saturn the Bald Bombshell. I like it. Dear lord help me I like it. Cole’s voice sounds a bit horse. Dang it what is the deal with the air horns over there? They’re freaking annoying! Saturn is fun to watch but he’s a bit nuts.

For the second time in the match we’re told he’s a machine. Ok good to know. Molly is on the apron even though she’s not in this match that I know of. Crash is freaking OVER. What the heck??? Terri breaks up a pin and we get a catfight. Saturn hits the Moss Covered Three Handled Family Credenza on Crash to get the pin. Only in wrestling would that make sense.

Rating: D. Again, what in the heck was this? It’s just a random match that made no sense and was just there. It’s not particularly good but it’s a good bit bad. This was just a waste of time but I guess they had to pad the two hour and twenty minute show somehow.

Regal is REALLY popular in London. This is just weird to see.

Regal is next to the Queen’s Cup, which would be Edge’s King of the Ring Cup.

Test is injured so he can’t fight tonight. Show says he’s a coward. It’s weird seeing Show with hair. This was during Show’s one piece swimsuit era. I don’t know what they were thinking during this time period but whatever. Test comes out and gets his head handed to him in a non-match. Dang his music was awesome.

I will stand by what I said when I said Test should have gotten a very short title reign in 1999 but it went to Big Show instead. Show kind of does an open challenge and then leaves before anyone can answer it. He looks way more intimidating with hair. And here’s Bradshaw to fight him.

Bradshaw vs. Big Show

Odd again. All of these European shows have a bad case of strangeness to them. How weird is it to think that Bradshaw would be a more important world champion than Show? Those chops Show did were freaking insane. EMTs come out to take care of Test. A flying shoulder just looks cool. There goes the referee.

Show goes after Test when he’s trying to leave which of course doesn’t work. A big boot into a steel chair and the Clothesline ends this with Bradshaw winning it for NO explainable reason. Dude it’s 2001 and Bradshaw beat Big Show. What sense does that make?

Rating: C-. Not bad for a big man fight. The booking is bearable I guess as it’s a show no one is going to see or hear about for months. This was just your standard battle of the big men which usually works pretty well. This was fine for what it was I guess but REALLY short.

Austin says Taker is stupid and the Decade of Destruction ends tonight. Amazingly, this is the halfway point of Taker’s WWE run. That’s insane.

Edge/Christian vs. Dudley Boyz vs. Hardy Boyz vs. X-Factor

For those of you that have no freaking clue who X-Factor is, there’s likely a pair of reasons for that. One is that half of the team is Justin Credible and the other is that the second half of the team is X-Pac. They were a blink and you’ll miss it stable that also included Albert. Their music was AWESOME though, even if they never won anything.

The Dudleys are of course WAY over. None of these guys are champions here and it’s elimination rules. That’s fun if nothing else. Seriously, why is X-Factor in this? DANG the Hardys got a nice pop.

This was just after the Hardys had their mini feud with Austin and HHH which transitioned to the Brothers of Destruction vs. Two Man Power Trip which is one of my favorite moments ever. If you ever want to see me get fired up, give me a scene where a face comes in from nowhere to save the day. I live for stuff like that. Ok not really but I really like them.

Justin and Bubba start. It’s a low ECW ratio tonight with only 3/8 being in the original organization. How in the world can people say that company meant nothing at all? Seriously, they’re stupid if they refuse to admit the truth about how influential it was. Justin and Bubba start us off. You can tell Heyman loves this. And now we shift to Christian and Matt, both future ECW Champions. That’s freaking amazing. Ok not really but it’s 230 AM and I’m tired so it’s more interesting than it should be.

Jeff gets a POP from the girls in the crowd. X-Pac comes in and is said to have youth and experience. In TMNT 2 that would make him a Keno/Splinter hybrid. Wow that would be epic. A women’s battle royal is mentioned which I don’t think is coming during a Bronco Buster. I hate that move. I truly do.

Jeff comes in again and again gets a big pop. Sweet goodness this was 9 years ago. That’s hard to believe. Everything breaks down and the Hardys double team special and a missed Albert splash ends X Factor. Less than ten seconds later an Unprettier puts Jeff out.

So it’s Edge and Christian vs. the Dudleys. Again, why did we need to have X Factor in there? This turns into your standard tag match with D-Von being the face in trouble, or playing Ricky Morton for those old school fans. This is one of those pairings that it’s just hard to mess up. Ah there’s your tag and Christian is LAUNCHED up on a back body drop.

Cole, the idiot that he is, says that What’s Up is being said in a universal language. Cole, IT’S THE SAME IN ENGLAND AND IN AMERICA. WOW I cannot stand that idiot at times. Table is attempted but doesn’t work. 3D is avoided, perhaps because they shout 3D just before it. With them on the floor, Rhyno hits the ring and gores Bubba so Edge can get the pin. Rhyno sets up a table but here’s Spike. Rhyno takes 3D through the table.

Rating: B-. Match number 3837 in their more or less never ending series. The key here though is they had known each other so well that the matches were almost always good. This was no exception. X-Factor had no point being there but whatever. The Edge/Dudleys and 4 team parts were fine so it passes with a decent grade.

We get highlights of a charity dinner from the previous night. Stephanie in a dress is a good thing. This is always cool and anytime something is being done for charity, even just showing up and saying some prewritten thing that you don’t mean, means a lot as you’re donating your time to something good, in this case being Make-A-Wish. Nothing wrong with this as charity is always cool.

Angle is ready for his 2/3 falls match and wants his medals that Benoit stole back. He would eventually get them back in a hilarious segment where Benoit had them down his tights and Angle grabbed them out and kissed them.

Steven Richards and Ivory, still in RTC, are here. Seriously, they picked this guy to substitute for Big Show in No Mercy? Why wasn’t he in the game in the first place? That never made any sense. We hear about Page Three and the models thing which is just amusing and really does show the cultural issues.

We saw one for like a second on Super Bowl Sunday and ever since then the halftime show has been acts my dad enjoys. Apparently the women’s battle royal is cancelled. This of course gets booed. The girls are going to come out and show how their ways are changed. First is Jackie. How about changing her to fired? Freshly face Trish is next and of course looks good.

Third is Lita. Sweet goodness she was a huge deal. She had the looks, the sex appeal, the look and the abilities. Note that there is a difference between looks and look. So wait was this a four Diva battle royal? What the heck? Ivory makes fun of them all and you figure the rest out.

Trish is really bad in the ring at this point and there goes Ivory’s clothes. RTC was a great gimmick if nothing else. Trish hits on him. This is rather amusing. He gets a low blow of course and there go his pants. Lita takes her top off and we get her cool theme song if nothing else following the moonsault. Harmless fun.

We see a clip from the Ultimate Submission match at Backlash with Benoit and Angle. They were tied up with 4 seconds to go and Benoit held it out but tapped like 2 seconds after. Benoit then won in overtime. He stole the medals on Raw, leading to this.

Chris Benoit vs. Kurt Angle

2/3 falls of Benoit and Angle? OH YEAH!!! Angle wants his medals and Benoit says they’re in a warm place. Apparently this is a week after Backlash. Should be noted that this is one of the combinations that I start the grading out at a B instead of a C given who is in the ring. Heyman says there’s a 6 pound weight difference between the two with Benoit at 229 and Angle at 236. Now how could a man with that kind of education have accounting issues?

The mat work that these two could do was amazing to say the least. It’s art out there. How often do you get to say that? Both go for their submissions and neither can get it this early of course. Dang Angle could throw a suplex. Then again so can Benoit. Benoit just goes nuts with the suplexes of various geographic designs. After about 9 of them a diving headbutt gives Benoit a completely clean pin.

That’s a bit odd but I guess you could argue that Angle knew he didn’t have to win the first fall. Angle pulls a Bret Hart and pretends to be hurt after the first fall. He hits a belly to belly from the top that is just a thing of beauty. It’s so crisp and it looks perfect the entire way. It goes to show you how good things could be if you just go with the basics and a wrestling based style.

I love how basic they keep things and at the same time how effective it can be. Then you get something out of nowhere like a DDT from Benoit. When has either of these guys used a DDT? Angle Slam is countered and it’s German time again.

The headbutt misses this time though so we get a bit of psychology there. It’s minor but it’s there. Both submissions are reversed but Benoit reverses Angle’s reversal into a rollup for the second straight fall. Post match Benoit pulls the medals out of his tights. This is great stuff and it’s so simple.

Rating: B+. Solid stuff here but did you expect something else? With only 15 minutes for two falls, how great can they make stuff though? They always had great matches and it’s pretty clear I love watching them. The wrestling was crisp and it came off great of course. The two straight falls were a bit of a surprise though so that’s a bit odd but still, solid stuff all around.

Austin complains about life in general. And the three treat Debra like crap. Good. She looks like it too. Stephanie looks great so there you go.

We get the exact same video package from Mania about Jericho vs. Regal. Well to be fair, how much new material is there and how much new stuff new stuff is there? Ah ok they did add some new stuff. That’s good. The start was the same though. We recap the Duchess of Queensbury match from Backlash which had a bunch of weird rules where more or less only Regal could win. Jericho beat Regal up on Raw. See, THIS is what we need at these shows: a reason to freaking care.

The Queen’s Cup is presented. Yeah it means nothing.

Queen’s Cup: William Regal vs. Chris Jericho

Regal gets a nice pop. Why are British wrestlers listed in stones in America and pounds in England? Regal looks a good bit less fat here for some reason. Jericho gets a much better pop which doesn’t surprise me. Dang Jericho was awesome at this time. Again: Jericho and Edge need face title runs. So does Orton. I have issues calling the month long transitional reign he had in 04 a real reign.

This should be sweet. Jericho busts out a high cross body. Where did that come from? They do the bad shoulder for Jericho as they did at Mania. Sweet goodness these two are fun to watch. Back to back good matches on a European show? What the heck is going on? This is a fun match. Regal is getting to show off quite a bit. DaNG Regal’s thigh is all blue and purple. Apparently he has a thigh bruise. That’s an understatement if nothing else.

Regal hooks a cobra clutch to go I guess retro on us. Regal is controlling here in case you were confused. Jericho is tied in the ropes which is a spot we need to see more often. An enziguri gets Jericho out of trouble and both guys are down.

No Jericho didn’t hit an enziguri while tied in the ropes. He’s great but not that great. I love that missile dropkick off the middle rope. It’s a cool spot while not being as high risk. Lionsault is blocked. Regal uses the spinout slam that Cena uses now. Wow Cena was just a year away at this point. And all of a sudden the Walls are on and we’re done. That came from a good bit of nowhere. Post match Regal breaks the cup over Jericho.

Rating: B+. This is a weird grade for me. While I liked it better than the Benoit/Angle match, it’s getting the same grade. They’re different kinds of matches. This was more of a popcorn match while Benoit and Angle were more of a performance. Both were very good, but at the same time they were completely different kinds of matches if that makes sense. It’s better than their very good Mania match, which is saying something I think.

We recap the Brothers of Destruction vs. The Two Man Power Trip which had three men of course. The Brothers lost the tag titles to them at Backlash in the all titles are on the line match. HHH is IC Champion and Austin is WWF Champion. Kane had a bad elbow and it cost them the tag titles, so Austin and HHH have all the main titles.

They injured Kane so Taker is on his own tonight in a handicap match for the world title. Kane would win the IC Title at Judgment Day and I think the next night HHH would tear his quad so we never got to the end of the angle, which of course would have been Austin vs. HHH, likely at Summerslam. Not sure if the Alliance would have happened then or not but I’d think not.

WWF Title: Undertaker vs. HHH/Steve Austin

Keep in mind, it’s announced that Taker only wins the title if he pins Austin. In other words, there is no point in going after HHH and no point in Austin ever wanting to tag in. I never liked Austin’s music at this time. He gets a pop even though he’s a heel which he needs to be at the time as his face status wasn’t going to work. Yet he was still getting pops. The problem was that he wasn’t going to be able to stay over with Rock as the epic face that he was so they had to turn Austin heel.

That and they had done Austin vs. everyone else already. But then again I think I’m the only person to like Austin’s heel turn. Taker uses his brain and grabs a chair to hold both guys off. Austin’s leg braces are partially gold. That just looks odd. What I liked about Austin as a heel was he was still the same badass. He just worked with Vince.

That was the problem with Austin though: he had so many heel tendencies already that it was hard to truly turn him without killing him completely. Corporate Austin wouldn’t have worked, at least not in my eyes. No one would have bought it after all the years he had fighting authority. They fight in the aisle as I’m assuming we have DQs here. Why in the world would you try a piledriver on the floor? Has that EVER worked? Well yeah but not in a main event match.

Taker COMPLETELY misses an elbow smash and HHH sells it anyway. That was just awful looking. Again, one ECW guy in there. Did anyone not go there at some point? Well I guess HHH and Taker didn’t so there. Austin is down…somewhere so it’s HHH vs. Taker. That works for me. Something is just looking awkward with these two tonight. It’s rather weird. Ah ok there are tags here. That’s where Austin is.

The announcers say Austin has bought into the team player idea so he’ll tag in. I’ll buy that I guess. Thesz Press gets a pop of course. That’s the problem with this and the problem with AJ as a heel: their offenses are designed to be faces and to get face pops. The character is heel, but the in ring stuff is face. That’s a big problem. Austin gets a chair shot in thanks to Stephanie distracting the referee. The kickout gets a REACTION.

I got tired of saying pop but that’s what it was. The tagging is a great help here as it makes this something close to believable. We hit a sleeper which goes on for way too long but I guess it’s ok. No idea why but it’s made me too sleepy to argue. This is mainly HHH vs. Taker of course. So now Austin hits a sleeper and Taker switches to a sleeper.

Boy that WWF is making sure to switch things up aren’t they? HHH goes to the top (WTF???) and does that really annoying spot where he jumps straight down and lands on Taker’s up foot. WHAT IS HE SUPPOSED TO BE DOING??? Taker makes a comeback and HHH goes through the table via (armbar) chokeslam. Cole is LOSING IT over this. CHokeslam hits on Austin. Taker is busted open from something.

Might have been from the sleepiness from earlier. Here’s Vince for no apparent reason. He of course gets chokeslammed and HHH gets hits with that and a chair for the pin. No title change though. I think I like that ending actually. That blood looks really bad. Oh dang it’s on the side of his head. It being legit helps a lot.

Rating: B. Not bad at all here. They managed to make this something close to believable, which is more than I would have expected of them. While it’s kind of ridiculous to think Taker beat both of them at once, the way they did it kind of worked so I was buying into it. It’s your standard main event though so that’s fine. This was good stuff I thought and a fine way to close the show.

Overall Rating: B. I liked this a lot actually. It’s by far and away the best of these shows and while it’s far from perfect, it’s certainly a good show. The first 50 minutes or so are pretty weak but after that it takes off and it takes off very well. There’s nothing great here and nothing worth going out of your way to see, but this is a good show and worth being a PPV for a change. WWF was hot at this point and this is no exception. Good show and worth checking out if you for some reason run across it.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of the NXT The Full Sail Years Volume III (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/05/25/new-book-nxt-the-full-sail-years-from-dallas-to-new-orleans/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

This was requested a few weeks back, though it’s an old version (over eight years) so the quality isn’t great.  I apologize in advance.

Insurrextion 2000
Date: May 6, 2000
Location: Earls Court, London, England
Attendance: 17,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Back to England as we haven’t been here in awhile. This is another of the English shows that is made to look like a PPV despite being a big house show. It’s about a week after Backlash where Rock won the title from HHH and the main event is Rock vs. HHH vs. Shane which I’m sure will be riveting. Other than that there isn’t much here at all. Let’s get to it so we can get it over with.

The opening video is painfully generic with HHH, Shane and Rock saying exactly what you would expect them to say. This was fairly pointless and doesn’t make me think much of the show tonight.

That pyro is loud!

Too Cool vs. Perry Saturn/Dean Malenko

The Radicalz are still new here having been around less than three and a half months to this point. Dean is Light Heavyweight Champions here which means absolutely nothing. Dean beat Scotty for the title so there’s your reasoning behind the match which is more than you would usually get here. I never got the appeal of Too Cool. They’re just not interesting to me in the slightest.

And what would a British show be without an air horn? Crowd is white hot too which is always a good sign. It’s weird seeing the old school barricades too. Saturn and Malenko are annoyed with each other apparently because Saturn hasn’t won a title yet. Saturn and Grandmaster get the mostly hot tags and the faces dominate.

I hate the Worm and any moves like it. If a bulldog keeps a guy down for like 10 seconds like that, why not cover them? If after ten seconds they can’t get out of the way of a chop, couldn’t they get pinned off a cover just after the bulldog? Anyway the top rope legdrop from Grandmaster to Saturn ends it. Saturn and Malenko fight afterwards.

Rating: D+. Eh not bad for an opener but at the same time this just didn’t have anything special about it at all. I’m not sure I get the logic of having the Radicalz lose either, but the match wasn’t that horrible. The fans were reacting well to it though so that’s a good sign I guess.

Mae gives Kat a pep talk.

And Vince is here! He says if HHH had gotten a fair match at Backlash he would have kept the title. Austin had run in during the match and hit HHH with a Stunner. Vince is awesome at what he does.

He has this confidence about himself and it works really well. Vince says Rock’s plan is that if he loses the title in England not a lot of people are going to know about it. You know, other than the people that watch Raw and see him without the belt. Vince says a relative of his will win the title. I’m not sure if there was a point to this or not.

Bull Buchanan vs. Kane

A month ago Buchanan and Boss Man broke Kane’s hand, hence the match. I love the organ music of Kane. It’s just sweet sounding. The pyro on the other hand will stop your heart. He has Bearer with him here too. We’re appearing to be in a squash match here as Kane completely dominates and then no sells a DDT. Yep Buchanan is dead in the water.

Buchanan hits his signature move where he runs up the corner and turns for a clothesline. Kane is of course up before Bull is. It’s ALL Kane here as even the stuff Bull hits has nothing as far as effect goes. A middle rope axe handle is caught in a chokeslam to end this in like 3 minutes.

Rating: C-. I like Kane so this was very fun. Buchanan was never really worth a thing so this kind of summed up his career: the best he’s got just got smacked right back in his face. This was one of the most one sided matches I’ve ever seen that didn’t involve a jobber, which is likely giving Buchanan too much credit but whatever. The rating is pure bias mind you.

Stephanie implies that Vince doesn’t like HHH which ticks him off.

Bradshaw vs. Road Dogg

Tori is freaking hot. She just is. And I always liked the King of Rock theme for DX. Also great to see these epic storylines getting closure on PPV like this. Farrooq does commentary here. The APA are total heels here and they go after Tori and the beatdown is on Road Dogg. Farrooq gets thrown out. Well you can’t say the first minute was boring.

Bradshaw works on the ribs a lot which makes sense. Not really but it felt right to say that. Ignore this and the previous sentence. This match is just boring. It feels like a house show match and that’s just not a good sign at all. Road Dogg has his ribs worked on for four minutes or so and then is just fine to get his two moves in where he dances. Why does that not surprise me?

The Clothesline isn’t quite a finisher yet but is a signature move at this point. And then a pumphandle slam ends it. Well that was riveting. I almost stopped watching that documentary on earwax.

Rating: F+. This was just bad. There’s no other way to put it. There was nothing of note here and Tori looking good was the only thing it had going for it whatsoever. It wasn’t interesting at all and there was no apparent reason for it happening. At least it’s over though.

Terri is ready.

The Kat vs. Terri

This is arm wrestling mind you. Kat has Mae Young and Terri has Moolah who are involved here for no explained reasons at all. Moolah’s legs are still nice looking actually. This feud went on forever and never wound up going anywhere but this is all about looks as neither of them could do a thing in the ring.

If you’ve seen any arm wrestling thin in wrestling ever, you know the next three minutes so I’ll be quiet for the most part. Terri and Mae both cheat and Kat wins. Terri pulls Kat’s top off and Kat is like screw it and shows them off. Naturally we don’t get to see a thing. Well it’s over at least. This was a waste of five minutes.

Rikishi is coming to the ring.

Crash is hiding.

Rock is JUST GETTING HERE.

Dudley Boys vs. Big Show/Rikishi

It’s Showkishi here which is funny if nothing else. It’s not as good as Shogan but it’s still good. We get a clip of Trish being put through a table at Backlash for no apparent reason. D-Von and the thong wearing Show start us off. The Dudleys are still awesome here but what are you really expecting here?

Show was world champion four months ago and Rikishi was one of the most popular guys on the roster at this point. Lawler makes jokes and my head begins to hurt. They beat up Rikishi for a bit and we’re just killing time so far. I want to break whoever it is that has that stupid airhorn. What’s Up on Rikishi.

Show comes in and clears house and it’s a double Stinkface. Bubba gets a table and the place freaking POPS. I’m sorry for this review being so lackluster but this show is just not interesting at all. And here are Edge and Christian to beat up the Dudleys. A chokeslam on Bubba ends it.

Rating: D. Another boring match here. Nothing of note happened at all and it was a glorified comedy act. Rikishi was popular though and they loved the table appearing even though nothing actually happened with it. This was just a waste of time, but it sets up this.

Too Cool comes out and they trade glasses with the Dudleys. All six of them dance. Ok, I know I think it’s stupid, but the place freaking ERUPTED for this and with the amount of flashbulbs going off you would think it was Austin vs. Rock.

Bubba goes insane and moves faster than he’s ever moved in his career. This is fun so it did its job. Also this is on a European PPV so it’s not like many people are going to see it anyway, at least not by comparison.

We see Angle going around London seeing the sights. He’s the cocky guy that is happy go lucky here and is just freaking great.

Angle cost Benoit the IC Title and tonight it’s Angle vs. Benoit.

Kurt Angle vs. Chris Benoit

Angle gets one heck of a pop. He criticizes the English spoken in London and I’m loving this. Benoit gets nowhere near the reaction of Angle which is odd. His eye is about as swollen as Trish’s chest. And here’s Crash Holly. Ok then. He’s looking for an Englishman to fight and there’s no one willing to apparently. His voice is great actually. Do I need to tell you that this match is going to be good?

This is more about Crash than anything else though as we have almost no commentary about Benoit or Angle but it’s ALL about Crash. Is there a point to this at all? I could watch Angle suplex people all day. Once Crash finally shuts up we get back in time to see Benoit hit the Rolling Germans. He uses a bridge on the last one for two which is different for him. And then Crash takes things over again.

Angle grabs the referee’s hand and jabs Benoit’s eye with it. I’ll ignore how completely contrived that is but whatever. Benoit misses the headbutt and the Angle Slam ends it. This was MAYBE 6 minutes long. What was that?

Rating: C+. And that’s with the elevated ratings for these two. This was likely the worst of their matches I’ve ever seen as it felt like there was no motivation at all or anything like that. They were totally going through the motions out there and I have NO idea what the deal was with Crash out there. If there has ever been a WTF moment involving these two, this was it.

A blonde Michael Cole asks Shane who Vince was talking about and Shane says he meant Shane.

British Bulldog comes running to the ring with a referee (Teddy Long) for a Hardcore Title match vs. Crash. Ok then.

Hardcore Title: British Bulldog vs. Crash Holly

To say the crowd erupted is an understatement. Crash chokes him to insane booing. This is by far the biggest reaction that Crash has ever gotten. Bulldog is just destroying him here as you would expect. Crash has a kendo stick broken over his back. The Powerslam gets the title. This was REALLY short.

Rating: N/A. This was for the live crowd and there’s not a thing wrong with that. Bulldog would never be on PPV again and would lose the title back in less than a week. He would have one or two more televised matches ever I think.

Edge and Christian sign a fan an autograph and get 5 pounds from a kid for it. They take a picture for another fan but get in front of him so it’s just of them. That costs ten pounds.

Tag Titles: Hardy Boys vs. Edge and Christian

The Canadians are champions here but does it really matter? Like Benoit vs. Angle, do I need to tell you that this is going to be good? Lawler calls Edge and Christian the beautiful people. JR says what’s next for Edge and Christian: shampoo commercials? Anyone that has watched Mania 18 knows why that’s funny.

How weird is it to think that this is 10 years ago and they’re one of the featured matches? Lawler seems to have a man crush on Edge and Christian. There’s nothing incredibly unique here but they know how to work well together and excite a crowd. That’s all you need to do sometimes and considering that this is a crowd that doesn’t often get live wrestling, even the most basic stuff they do is going to seem more impressive than usual.

Christian hits a nice powerslam on Jeff. Oh great now I’m typing to the beat that those airhorns are being blown at. Simple heel tactics really do work well. Edge kept Jeff from making the hot tag and got booed for it. Simple but effective. What more can you ask for? We follow that up with the classic referee missing the tag which is heavily booed. I love basics. Matt gets the tag which for some reason gets a very limited reaction.

And now it’s all breaking down. The double finisher hits Christian but Edge breaks it up with the bell for the DQ. Did you really expect anything else? The Dudleys come out and 3D Christian and put Edge through a table. Wait…they’re faces here??? What the heck?

Rating: B-. Solid stuff here, but they’ve had far more interesting and better matches before. They used a very basic formula here and it worked well. They beat the tar out Jeff and he sold it like a master. This was good for what it was supposed to be though, weak ending aside.

We recap Eddie vs. Jericho which is mainly over Chyna leaving Jericho for Eddie.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Chris Jericho

Eddie is European Champion here and Jericho is IC Champion. There’s a coin toss to determine which belt is on the line. Eddie doesn’t like Europe. Chyna speaks Spanish and I understand her. Jericho gets a big old pop. It’s weird to think that these two had been in the company less than a year combined.

He was completely gold on the mic at this point as you could see how much fun he was having just being out of WCW and being the midcard champion less than 8 months in. Eddie loses and the European Title is on the line. Jericho dominates early and Eddie tries to run but his woman won’t let him. That’s kind of amusing for some reason. I love the incredible cockiness of Jericho. It’s just an awesome character trait that makes him work.

Things like the posing pin and shouting ASK HIM to the referee. I love those kind of things and they’re so simple. Eddie takes over and snaps off a perfect hurricanrana. There’s a Gory Special that neither announcer recognizes as his father’s hold, so they call it a modified abdominal stretch.

Then he hooks an inverted one. Where is Mike Tenay or even Matt Striker when you need them? You can tell there’s a lot of improvising here and it’s working quite well. Well what did you expect from two of the best ever? Both guys go over the top and Eddie may have hurt his back. Chyna hits Jericho with a DDT for two. Jericho gets the double powerbomb which is just awesome. And there’s the belt shot to Jericho to end it.

Rating: B. Solid stuff here but then again what did you expect? Jericho had a fire in him at this point and it was very clear he was having a great time out there. Jericho would drop the belt to Benoit in two days so it’s not like this went on long anyway. This was a good match though and by far the best of the night. The ending was predictable but what else did you really expect?

Shane and HHH argue about who gets to win the title and over who Vince wanted to win. Stephanie says it doesn’t matter.

We recap this whole thing as Shane wouldn’t count the pin at Backlash when Rock had the title won. Linda and the fired Earl Hebner came in and counted the three anyway so that Rock could be champion.

Rock says he’ll overcome the odds.

WWF Title: The Rock vs. Shane McMahon vs. HHH

Hmm I wonder what’s going to happen. Shane hides to start and I can’t blame him for it. It’s smart if nothing else. Rock destroys them both to start us off. He even puts the crown on the head of Shane and then punches him, freaking Lawler out. This show needs to end. In a funny bit, HHH does Shane’s foot shuffle and looks like he’s about to destroy every muscle in his legs.

Rock of course dances as well to make it a threesome. Oh dear. I love JR freaking out over so many little things and saying how much they’re cheating. There just isn’t much to say about this match as there is no drama at all, which is the universal problem that comes up in all of the European shows.

Nothing major ever happens at them and this is no exception. JR says HHH needs to calm down or he’ll get thrown out of the match and then saves himself by saying that would be the referee’s discretion. HHH hooks a long chinlock as we’re killing time like it’s a colony of ants at a picnic. JR: I would say Vince is here for moral support but that would be inaccurate. Yeah I know. That’s why you just said it. Little mistakes like that crack me up.

The other two finally fight it out as we go into the old and traditional formula for these matches. Why mess with what works? Stephanie distracts the referee so Rock’s pin isn’t seen off a DDT to Shane. The referee proves to be a complete idiot by seeing Rock try to counter Shane’s Pedigree, seeing Rock counter Shane’s Pedigree, seeing Rock setting for a slingshot, seeing the slingshot being executed, and STILL managing to get crushed by it. You fail at like Chioda. You just do.

HHH pops Rock with the belt and there’s no referee. Gerald Brisco comes out as the second referee but only gets two. I think that’s what happened at least. The insurmountable odds are piling up way too high. Shane pops HHH with a chair by accident and that brings in Vince.

Rock kicks out of a Pedigree and down goes Brisco. There’s the second Pedigree. ROCK IS DONE RIGHT? It’s EARL HEBNER for the save. Let’s see that’s I believe four interferences and two weapons so far. This is perfectly reasonable right? Vince takes the Rock Bottom and Shane takes the spinebuster and elbow for the pin.

Rating: B-. Fun but WAY overbooked. This just got insane towards the end and it was nearly impossible to keep track of what was going on. I get that there has to be some interference or whatever, but DANG man do you think you did enough? Brisco could have been left out and it would have helped a lot. It was entertaining though and that’s really all that mattered. Decent enough though, but a less cluttered match would have helped a lot.

Overall Rating: D+. There have been worse European shows but this wasn’t very good at all. The main event is fun and Eddie vs. Jericho is good, but other than that there’s nothing here that hasn’t been done 1000x better on more important shows. That’s what these always come down to: it’s been done and it’s been done better. This isn’t terrible though, but there’s nothing here worth sitting down and watching.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of the NXT The Full Sail Years Volume III (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/05/25/new-book-nxt-the-full-sail-years-from-dallas-to-new-orleans/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

The year is 1999, and for some reason, the millennium came early.

I’m sure everyone remembers or has checked out the WWE network to see one of the great debuts in WWE history. Instead of the countdown clock existing to usher in a new year, it ushered in a new superstar in Chris Jericho.

In August.

Shortly after Jericho’s debut, a strange symbol started appearing on the Titantron. For weeks, we saw only this symbol, wondering what it meant. At the Royal Rumble, we found out that it meant Red Hook was invading the WWF in the form of Tazz.

Had those two guys been around today, things would be a bit different. They’d both be young, hungry, and coming from smaller wrestling organizations than WWE. Thus, a year in NXT would likely be in the cards and if the NXT crowd takes to them, the internet would be abuzz with their impending debuts the week after Wrestlemania.

Ho. Hum.

While I do see the value in the system that has been created today, I struggle to see how the overly formulaic strategy is, in the words of the family that runs the place, “best for business”. After all, didn’t spontaneity allow that same family to become THE family in wrestling?

It did, but that isn’t an excuse to rely on a calendar to do all your work for you. Instead of feuds dictating gimmick matches, the calendar does. And while many have addressed that, few have addressed the backlash to reserving debuts solely for Wrestlemania week.

Just this year, we were treated to one of the best TakeOver events ever. For me though, the thing that holds it back is what holds back every Takeover on Wrestlemania weekend, the predictability. When 60% of your matches feature individuals and teams that are near certainties to get the call up, you know they aren’t winning their matches. And the bigger problem, is what happens afterwords.

I remember hearing a while back that due to some of the main roster flops of his “babies”, Triple H wanted all NXT talent set to debut to have 6 months of storylines ready to go. This was so that each debuting talent would have a real opportunity to succeed on the main roster. Fast forward to today, and outside of The Iconics, who else debuted with a story?

The answer is nobody, and worse, people who were somebodies in NXT are coming to the main roster were little fanfare. A lot of smarter fans (many of whom likely read this site) said things like this before Wrestlemania weekend:

“I’m picking Baszler because Ember will probably go to the main roster after Mania.”

“I got Black because Almas and Vega should be headed up north” (because it’s still the 80’s and the main roster is considered “New York”……)

When you know someone is leaving, it negatively effects what you’re watching (see Lesnar, Brock vs Goldberg, Bill 2004), and why this has become the status quo, I can only venture a guess, laziness.

Yes, the ever-present trope of rematch clauses, trilogies, and now set debut times are conveniently easy for the writers. And because us fans have fed into it, and we look forward to the post-Mania debuts, we let it happen. I admit, even I’m guilty of getting hyped for the returns and debuts the night after Mania. Of course, it’s kind of like getting the date with the hot, lame cheerleader. The idea of it happening is far better than when it actually happens.

The sad thing is, WWE is capable of debuting these talents with fanfare and importance. Samoa Joe burst onto the scene as HHH’s muscle and he has been treated as a main eventer ever since. Kevin Owens debuted against John Cena and has never faltered. Both took place organically within an existing storyline, so their debuts were treated as an important continuation, not just a “hey look, they’re here!” scenario.

The point is, while I’m not totally against the post-Mania debuts, I certainly think we can do better. The calendar should not be dictating what happens in wrestling, the stories should. When wrestling is at its best, things just fit. We’ve seen it before. I don’t want writer laziness to take away from us ever seeing it again.

Eric Cordova is the host of the Mouth of the South Shore Radio Show. The show airs live on Wednesday nights at 9pm at i95sportsnetwork.com and TuneInRadio (i95). Follow the show at the Mouth of the South Shore Radio Show page on Facebook and @motssradio on Twitter and Instagram.

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 24, 2003
Location: E Center, Salt Lake City, Utah
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re coming up on Thanksgiving but more importantly tonight is a double shot with HHH challenging Goldberg for the Raw World Title and Raw Roulette all night long. It’s a night of Spin the Wheel Make the Deal, which used to be one of my favorite ideas when I was a kid. Now let’s see how WWE can screw it up. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

The roulette wheel is in the ring to start, accompanied by Eric Bischoff and a pair of showgirls. Bischoff reiterates that Raw Roulette is taking place because this is such a boring town and explains the concept. We get the first spin for a match to be announced but it’s Shawn Michaels with an interruption instead. Shawn says Bischoff interrupted him last week so this is his way of returning the favor. He’s spent the last week thinking back to Survivor Series and now it’s completely clear: he did the exact right thing. Shawn gave the fight of his life and didn’t cost Austin his job.

Cue Batista to say he cost Austin his job. Shawn wants the “jacked up nimrod” to come fight right now so he comes, only to have Bischoff cut them off. The match is made for Armageddon but tonight, as per the wheel, it’s Bischoff’s Choice. Tonight, we’ll do Batista/Ric Flair vs. Shawn/Chris Jericho.

Lita vs. Victoria

In a cage via a spin from Molly Holly and I believe the first women’s cage match in company history. Lita throws her her into the cage a few times to start and Lawler is panicking over Victoria’s thong being exposed. Victoria gets in her spinning side slam for two but Lita gets in a monkey flip and some right hands. A hurricanrana nearly drops Victoria on her head but she’s able to get in a slam off the top.

Lita goes up again….and falls off with no one touching her. That’s a really bad sign, as is Victoria ramming her into the cage again. A powerbomb pulls Victoria off the cage and there’s the moonsault. Lita goes for the door and here’s Matt Hardy to slam the door on her head to give Victoria the easy win.

Rating: D-. That fall off the cage looked so bad and there was no saving this thing. There was little drama and with only four minutes, you can’t get much done in there. It’s not a good match and there’s no real build to it, which is what’s going to cause problems with the show all night long.

Post match Matt goes after Lita but Christian runs in for the save.

Bischoff’s showgirls are huddled around Randy Orton, who promises to win the Intercontinental Title at Armageddon. He has a match tonight too and Bischoff has already spun the wheel for him (erg), setting up a Legend Killer match. Orton leaves and here are Hurricane and Rosey, who have a match tonight as well. They’ll be having a midget catching match and here’s a midget named Fernando, who runs off. Bischoff actually explains the match and Hurricane isn’t sure, so Bischoff says if they refuse, the loser gets fired. Hurricane: “I see. Rosey, wait here.” The chase is on.

Sgt. Slaughter vs. Randy Orton

Slaughter grabs a quickly broken Cobra Clutch as the fans chant USA. You know, in opposition to that foreigner from the far off city of St. Louis. Orton forearms him down and pounds away, setting up a sleeper. That’s reversed into a camel clutch which Slaughter reverses into another Cobra Clutch. Orton makes the rope and kicks him low, setting up the RKO for the pin. This was a thing that happened.

Post match Orton stomps away until Rob Van Dam makes the save.

Video on Goldberg vs. HHH from Survivor Series and the handicap match from last week.

Val Venis and Lance Storm are waiting for some women to arrive. These are a little more conservative than usual so they have to prove that they’re nicer guys. The ladies, looking pretty much the same as most of Venis’ women, show up and are ready to go out but are worried about wrestlers being too crazy. Cue Hurricane and Rosey, the former with a net, chasing Fernando. Storm: “They’re not with us.”

Ric Flair and Coach plug the Ultimate Ric Flair DVD set (Amen brother. That thing was awesome.) with Flair promising to take care of Shawn tonight.

Matt Hardy is ready to spin the wheel but first, insists that he’s slammed the door on Lita for good. Hang on though, as Bischoff has to gloat about firing Austin, though he does plug Austin’s upcoming UPN special. It’s a Strange Bedfellows match (Matt: “WHOA WHOA WHOA! Version 1 is straight!”), meaning a tag match with first time ever partners.

Lillian starts introducing the next match but hang on because we need to see Goldberg spearing HHH in video game form.

Bubba Ray Dudley/Garrison Cade vs. Matt Hardy/Christian

Sure why not. Matt and Bubba start with Hardy taking a heck of a chop to the chest. A takedown is enough for the tag to Christian (via a slap to the chest, which Matt may have learned from Bubba). Cade comes in with a headlock and the fans want tables. To be fair they’re more interesting than Cade’s headlock. A bulldog gets two on Christian and a middle rope shoulder is enough for the tag back to Bubba. The backsplash misses though…and Matt drops to the floor to walk out on Christian. The Bubba Bomb connects and Bubba yells at Matt, leaving Cade to tag himself in and drop a top rope elbow for the pin.

Rating: D. Angle instead of a match and that’s fine enough. Cade and Mark Jindrak have nothing going for them so giving the team a few wins isn’t the worst idea in the world. The gimmick allowed that to happen and it’s not quite as big of a deal as a cage match so this isn’t as annoying. Nothing match of course.

JR is aghast at Matt walking out on this nothing tag match. He wasn’t this annoyed at SLAMMING A METAL DOOR ON HER HEAD EARLIER. Cade hands Bubba the title but doesn’t let it go. Bubba yells a bit and Cade sneers as he leaves.

Shawn Michaels promises to beat the odds again tonight. He goes to leave but stops to point out the midget looking up Terri’s dress. A chase ensues.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Goldberg

HHH is challenging. They talk trash to start until a Flair distraction lets HHH deck him from behind. That earns HHH a hard clothesline and the fight heads outside with Goldberg’s ankle seeming fine so far. Goldberg gets sent hard into the steps and it’s time to start working over the shoulder. You know, instead of the ankle that was broken about a month ago.

A knee drop rocks Goldberg again but he’s still able to slam HHH off the top. For some reason Goldberg thinks ducking your head against HHH is a good idea and that means a facebuster. The gorilla press powerslam drops HHH again but Flair grabs the foot. Cue Orton to grab Goldberg, which should be a DQ, but seems to be nothing as HHH hits the Pedigree to draw out Kane. That just earns him a spear so Kane comes in and attacks Goldberg to FINALLY draw the DQ. I’m not sure if that was a missed spot or really bad officiating but it looked terrible more than once.

Rating: D+. The ending destroys any good stuff this could have been but the bigger problem is how these two just don’t work well together. They haven’t had a good match yet and this feud has been going on since before Summerslam. HHH works too much of a power style to make this work and it’s not getting better every time they fight. We’ll be getting it again too and that’s really annoying to hear, but it’s what HHH wants so who are we to complain?

Post break HHH and Kane storm into Bischoff’s office so a triple threat is made for Armageddon.

Fernando runs through the parking lot.

Booker T. vs. Mark Henry

Bischoff’s spin makes this a Salt Lake City street fight but Booker is waiting on Henry at the entrance. That means a stop sign to the head but Henry doesn’t even go down. Henry takes that away and bends it with ease so Booker tries a 2×4. That earns him a ram into the corner so Booker swings a metal skillet. Henry bends THAT and clotheslines Booker to the floor as this is more of a strongman demonstration than a match. The missile dropkick puts Henry down and the ax kick gets two. Booker goes for a trashcan but Henry takes it away and smashes him in the head for the pin.

Rating: D+. There’s something to be said about Henry wrecking the weapons and doing the scary power stuff. It’s not a good match of course but I was entertained and that’s as good as you can get here. The problem is it’s also bad booking as you don’t want Henry and Booker T. trading wins in short matches. That philosophy doesn’t work, no matter how much WWE likes to think it does.

Trish Stratus gets a bra and panties match but doesn’t seem to mind. She leaves and runs into Chris Jericho, who offers to use his Bischoff favor to get her out of it. Trish: “I’ve got this.” Jericho: “I know you’ve got it but I can go talk to him.” Trish talks about the Shawn tag match and Trish wants him to be the man that she knows he is. Maybe if he’s good with Shawn tonight, she’ll be good with him tonight. That gets Jericho’s attention.

JR plugs the Austin special. As he and Lawler are talking, Fernando runs up and sits on JR’s lap, making him the winner. JR puts his hat on Fernando, who has a mustache, and calls him a little fella.

Rob Van Dam vs. Scott Steiner/Test

The wheel comes up with a handicap match but Orton convinces Bischoff to spin it again for a bonus stipulation, which is a Singapore cane match. Rob knocks Steiner off the apron and dives onto Test, followed by a whip to send Steiner into the steps. Scott gets kicked down but Test scores with a cane shot to break up Rolling Thunder. A clothesline with the cane gets two but Rob is right back with the kicks. Rob canes Steiner by mistake and the Five Star hits Scott. Test’s second shot to the head puts Rob down for the pin.

Jericho tries to get Trish out of the match but Bischoff thinks he’s falling for her.

Jackie Gayda vs. Trish Stratus

Bra and panties of course. Jackie jumps her to start but gets her top pulled off early on. Trish gets put in the Tree of Woe and loses her top as well. Rico gets pulled in and loses his pants, which he seems to like. Jackie kicks Rico down by mistake and Trish takes her down for the win.

Post match Jackie freaks out and rips off Lillian Garcia’s jacket.

Trish tells Jericho that their evening activities depends on what he does. That’s quite the offer.

Chris Jericho/Shawn Michaels vs. Batista/Ric Flair

The arena is full of smoke from Shawn’s pyro. Shawn chops at Flair to start and Jericho comes in off the tag with no issues. A missile dropkick gets two on Flair and a few chops set up the Flair Flop. Batista comes in and spinebusts the heck out of Jericho. It’s back to Flair who goes up top and you know what’s next.

The tag brings Shawn back in as they’re certainly running through this one in a hurry. Batista gets knocked off the apron, leaving Shawn and Flair to punch it out. A poke to the eye blinds Shawn and he punches Jericho by mistake, followed by the superkick to Flair. Jericho superkicks Shawn, who falls onto Flair for the pin.

Rating: D. These four should be able to do better than this by definition. The time was killing them again though as there’s not much you can do with so little time and an angle involved in the finish. Shawn vs. Batista could be good with Shawn knowing how to handle someone like him, but the Jericho addition is a little odd.

Jericho bolts to the back as Shawn isn’t sure what happened. Batista and Flair lay Shawn out with Shawn bleeding from the mouth to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. I didn’t hate the show but there wasn’t much to see on there. The Raw Roulette thing helped a bit but having the chase scenes all night with JR as the payoff is a little beneath what I was hoping for. They set some stuff up for Armageddon though and that’s what helps most. However, when one of those things is ANOTHER Goldberg vs. HHH match, there’s only so much positive to be gathered. That story needs to change soon because it’s been out of steam for months now. There’s not much good to be found here, but I’ll take a gimmick show like this over a regular boring night.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of the WWE Grab Bag (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/03/23/new-paperback-kbs-grab-bag/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 17, 2003
Location: SE Texas Arena, Beaumont, Texas
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re past Survivor Series and that means we’re on the way to Armageddon to end the year. Eric Bischoff is back in full control of the show as Steve Austin’s team lost last night. I’m sure we’ll NEVER see him again. Goldberg is still the Raw World Champion too, having dispatched Evolution on a bad ankle. Why do I have a feeling that the HHH feud is far from over though? Let’s get to it.

Here’s Survivor Series if you need a recap.

Austin’s face comes up at the end of the opening and Bischoff spray paints it out. Not bad for a chuckle.

We hear Austin’s post match speech from last night, complete with photos and clips of his career, all the way back to 1989. The shot closes on the two beer cans Austin left in the ring.

In the arena, Bischoff and his team from last night look down on the same beer cans, which Eric stomps on. Those who have supported him are in for some good times but for those against him, it’s the beginning of the end. Each member of his team gets a special favor, good for anything anytime (within reason).

Cue the rest of Evolution with HHH congratulating Bischoff on his victory last night. The thing is though, it was Evolution that gave Bischoff the win. Without them, Austin would still be in charge. Bischoff agrees, so HHH can have a rematch with Goldberg any time. In a bizarre line, HHH says that’s “very white” of Bischoff (HHH to Long and Henry: “No offense guys.”). HHH blames the sledgehammer for the loss and instead of a title match tonight, we’ll have a 3-1 handicap match with Goldberg facing Evolution minus Flair. Bischoff says that’s the bottom line.

Booker T. vs. Mark Henry

Booker wastes no time in hammering away but some hard forearms knock him backwards in a hurry. A kick to the chest rocks Henry but one heck of a clothesline takes care of that. They’re already doing things right with Henry here: have Henry stand in the middle while the more talented guy does his thing and bounces off of Henry. A sleeper brings Henry down to a knee until he powers Booker into the corner. Booker gets run over for good measure and Henry stands on his chest. Again: using the power game in simple, effective way is what serves Henry best.

We hit the neck crank for a bit until Henry misses a charge in the corner. Booker kicks away and the ax kick FINALLY puts Henry down. The missile dropkick does it again but Henry counters a third kick into a powerslam for two. Henry tries another charge into the corner, only to get rolled up with Booker putting his feet on the ropes for the pin.

Rating: C-. Not too shabby at all here with Booker knowing how to get the best out of Henry. I know he gets a lot of flack and a lot of it is deserved but Henry has a role that few can play. Let him do his thing like this (maybe winning a match here or there) and it might get him somewhere. That’s a good asset to have when you need to give someone a rub down the line.

La Resistance vs. Mark Jindrak/Garrison Cade

There’s no graphic behind Cade and Jindrak’s names for some reason. The Americans clean house to start and for some reason, Cade is allowed to talk. He brings up his fellow Texans and dedicates the match to the armed forces (well to be fair it’s been like a week). Those are fighting words so we’re ready to go.

Back in and Conway scores with a hurricanrana as JR recaps the night. We’re not even half an hour into the show so it’s a bit early for a recap. A throat snap across the top rope gives Conway two on Jindrak but he suplexes Dupree out of the corner. Cade comes in to clean house and a very hard clothesline gets two on Dupree. The dropkick/spinebuster combination puts Conway away. The match was barely long enough to rate and the promo was after the bell. Not much to this one of course, but at least the rookies got a clean win for a change.

Shawn Michaels has something to say about the loss last night but Bischoff cuts the interview. Shawn talks about everything that went down last night and said it was about doing the right thing. All Bischoff cares about is the power but Bischoff says he didn’t lose last night like Michaels did. For tonight, Shawn is ejected from the building.

Stills of the ambulance match, which again made Shane look like a bigger star than most of the roster.

Kane will be on Smackdown to eulogize the Dudleys.

Scott Steiner has used his favor to get himself and Test a Tag Team Title shot. In exchange, he’s no longer Test’s property. Test agrees but makes it clear that Stacy is still his property and will do what he wants.

Intercontinental Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Ric Flair

Flair is challenging, Orton is on commentary and as per Bischoff’s orders, the Five Star is banned. They pose at each other to start until Rob kicks him down and gets two off a standing moonsault. A spinning legdrop sends Flair bailing and it’s time for a slugout on the floor with Rob getting the better of it.

JR complains about the Five Star being banned, saying it would be like banning the RKO. Orton warns them to watch it because he seems them as a legendary announce team. Lawler gets the threat and says JR is a legend but says nothing about himself. As expected, it seems to go sailing over JR’s head. Flair sends him knee first into the steps to take over but the knee is fine enough for a spinwheel kick.

The Figure Four goes on until Rob turns it over so there’s a chop block for even worse measure. Rob pops back up with a middle rope spinning crossbody and superkicks Flair down. That’s enough to bring Orton to ringside but Rob kicks him down as well. Ric’s low blow only gets two and Rob loads up the Five Star, drawing in Orton for an RKO off the top and the DQ.

Rating: C. They were getting going here and that’s a good sign for when Orton takes the title from Van Dam. This seemed to exist for the sake of making Orton the next challenger and that’s the right call. Orton needs something like that to establish himself more as for now, he’s just a bunch of potential without a big win.

Orton puts the title on and drops it on Rob.

Coach makes fun of Hurricane and Rosey before going into Bischoff’s office. Eric has a big surprise for next week: Raw Roulette! In Salt Lake City, Utah! Bischoff is holding it there because the city is boring and they need something to make the show interesting.

It’s time for the Highlight Reel with Jericho saying it’s not his fault that Austin was in over his head. Jericho wasn’t the sole survivor last night but he was the one who got the match off the ground in the first place. So he deserves a H*** YEAH for helping get rid of Austin! That brings him to his guest this week: Lita. She doesn’t seem happy to be here and doesn’t want to hear anything about Jericho or especially Christian.

Instead here’s Matt Hardy to return to Raw, drawing a big smile from Lita. Matt quickly kisses her and has a question that he has to ask from one knee. Before it can be asked though, here’s Molly Holly to interrupt. She has a question of her own: what does she have to do to get some respect around here? She’s the Women’s Champion and beat Lita at Survivor Series but who is out here getting the attention? Jericho likes the animosity and thinks we should have a mixed tag tonight. Molly agrees, but with Bischoff as her partner. Matt and Lita don’t know what to think.

Post break Bischoff asks what Molly is thinking. She thought this could be the beginning of the end for Lita, so Bischoff adds some stipulations: if they win, Lita is fired for good. If Matt and Lita win, Lita gets a rematch for the Women’s Title.

Tag Team Titles: Dudley Boyz vs. Scott Steiner/Test

Steiner/Test are challenging. The fans want tables but have to wait through D-Von and Test starting things off. Lawler: “They don’t have tables here in Beaumont, Texas? Do they eat off the floor?” Test powers him around to start but walks into a jumping elbow to the jaw. Steiner comes in and gets punched in the head for his efforts, before it’s off to Bubba in his hardcore shorts.

Stacy cheers as Bubba hits a side slam but then sits back down in her chair so Test can yell at her some more. We actually hear about the Duchess of Dudleyville, with Lawler bringing up the history. I’m as confused as you are. It’s back to Test for a running clothesline in the corner, followed by jumping jacks for a little exercise. You have to get it in when you can.

We hit the chinlock and Stacy slaps the mat to get Bubba back to his feet. That means a Bubba Bomb for a break and the hot tag brings in D-Von to clean house. Everything breaks down and a thumb to the eye looks to set up Test’s pumphandle slam. That’s escaped as well and What’s Up Test. He’s right back up (make your own joke) with a full nelson slam to D-Von but now he wants Stacy to throw him a belt. She says no, and that means a 3D to retain the titles.

Rating: C+. Actually a good match here with both teams getting to look good out there. Test and Steiner are fine for a power team and I would have tolerated them a lot more over the last several months had they just done this rather than the whole feud and owning Stacy thing. They need another few teams but the tag division is starting to put some pieces together for a change.

Matt and Lita are in the back with Matt saying he wanted their first kiss to be in front of the world. Haven’t they done that already? Anyway, now it’s about getting her a shot at the Women’s Title. Matt leaves and Trish comes in for the rapid fire giggling.

Lita/Matt Hardy vs. Molly Holly/Eric Bischoff

They all get jobber entrances for some reason and genders can mix. Lita throws Molly down to start as the announcers point out Bischoff wrestling in a suit. That’s rather nice for a change as there’s no reason for him to have gear ready. Molly pulls Lita into the corner for two and we hit the chinlock. A Reverse DDT gets Lita out of trouble as Jerry keeps talking about the suit. Eric comes in and gets slapped, allowing Matt to….drop to the floor instead of coming in. Bischoff pulls Lita down by the hair and gets a really bad rollup (there’s no way I’m buying Lita couldn’t kick out of that) for the pin.

Post match Matt says he was going to ask Lita how she could be so selfish. All she had to do was come join him on Smackdown but instead she had to come back to Raw for the Women’s Title. She couldn’t even do that right though and it’s clear that the title and her career mean more than him and their relationship. They are THROUGH and Matt walks out. And that’s the end of any drama between them for the rest of time.

Val Venis vs. Rico

Venis has the women and Lance Storm to counter Miss Jackie. An early shoulder puts Rico down as the announcers start talking about Matt and Lita as this is pretty clearly just background noise for their chatter. Rico escapes a suplex and grabs a Backstabber to take over as the announcers talk about the ratings.

We get back to the match with Rico hitting a knee lift and a discussion about which section of the closet Rico is in/coming out of/was in. Rico drops an elbow and gyrates the hips as the discussion moves to JR being put on the Roulette wheel next week. This is reaching WCW levels of ignoring the match.

Rico grabs the chinlock as Jerry thinks JR could be in an inferno match and JR reacts accordingly. Val fights up and hits some clotheslines as JR says Rico wouldn’t fit in down in Muskogee. A Blue Thunder Bomb gets two and Val’s big boot gets the same. The Money Shot is loaded up but Val has to kick Jackie to the floor (in a big crash). She gets up to look at Storm, which isn’t noteworthy on its own but does include probably the longest nip slip in WWE history (edited but still visible on the Network). Rico gets shoved down as well and now the Money Shot is good for the pin. Storm wasn’t a factor.

Rating: D+. The wrestling wasn’t the worst (though it could have been about three minutes shorter) but the commentary here was what got the most focus. It was clear that the match was just there because they didn’t have anything else to do and I feel sorry for the wrestlers then. It’s nice to have them get out there and get to show off what they can do (in a watchable enough match) but egads can the announcers pretend that it matters?

Post match, Val and Storm dance with the ladies.

Lita (with her dog in her purse, which always looks dumb) is leaving when she runs into Christian. He has good news for her: he used his Bischoff favor to get her job back. Christian even picks up her bag and offers a shoulder to cry on, which she accepts.

Same Austin video as the opener.

We look at Orton RKOing Mark Cuban. Why that wasn’t a dark segment eludes me.

Orton has cashed in his favor for an Intercontinental Title shot at the next (unnamed) pay per view. He lists off some great Intercontinental Champions, forgetting HHH until the boss points it out. That’s fine enough because all that matters to HHH is getting the pin tonight in the handicap match.

Jericho asks Trish out for another date but she turns him down for being in on the Matt/Lita shenanigans. He denies all involvement and somehow offers up enough charm to get a kiss out of the whole thing.

Evolution vs. Goldberg

Orton starts for the team but his partners are quickly knocked to the floor with Randy being tossed on top of them. It’s off to Batista for the big power showdown but Goldberg knocks him down with one shot, followed by a powerslam for two. The ankle seems fine so far. HHH comes in and gets hammered in the face and suplexed.

Flair breaks up the spear though and HHH’s jumping knee to the face takes over. Orton’s dropkick rocks Goldberg but he spears the heck out of HHH. Batista and Orton get clotheslined down, only to have HHH come back with the facebuster. There’s the RKO (JR: “You gotta get up Billy.”) and a Batista Bomb, followed by the Pedigree to end Goldberg.

Rating: D. So to the shock of no one, last night’s win over HHH means nothing because we’re still waiting on him to get his title back from Goldberg. The normal question would be “well if that match didn’t count, why should I watch the next pay per view?” but that’s answered because everything gets important as soon as HHH gets the title back. This was all about rebuilding HHH, because Heaven forbid we go a DAY without him getting the upper hand on Goldberg.

Post match HHH says he’s cashing in his rematch next week. Tonight isn’t over though and he wraps a chair around Goldberg’s neck, drawing out Kane for the unlikely save. A sloppy chokeslam plants Goldberg to end the show instead.

Overall Rating: C-. The wrestling wasn’t the worst here but the important thing was the storytelling. HHH aside, this show moved a lot of the stories in new and/or positive directions. Trish/Lita/Jericho/Christian in particular is really shaping up and there are several ways they could go with it. Throw in a lot of people having issues with Bischoff and the need for some fresh names to rise up and fight him and I’m actually interested in where some of this stuff goes. Better show than recent weeks, and I’m curious to see where a lot of it goes.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of the WWE Grab Bag (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/03/23/new-paperback-kbs-grab-bag/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: October 27, 2003
Location: Crown Coliseum, Fayetteville, North Carolina
Attendance: 5,500
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Evolution is back to full strength and Goldberg is down to one ankle after last week. Batista made his return from a long injury layoff to collect the bounty on Goldberg. That sets HHH up very well as we head towards Survivor Series, though we don’t have much set up for the show just yet. Let’s get to it.

Here’s last week show if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of the bounty being cashed in last week. Batista’s return went as well as it could have and makes him look like a killer in the process. This is set to what used to be Rey Mysterio’s WCW music, which must be public domain as it pops up every so often.

Opening sequence.

There’s a cage above the ring. Lawler: “Why is the cage here?” Maybe because there’s a cage match scheduled?

Here’s Evolution minus HHH and of course the fans are very happy to see Ric Flair. We get right to the point (how nice for a change) with Flair saying Goldberg won’t be here tonight. The fans seem rather indifferent, or at worst happy with the news. Batista was the man who did that and says that Goldberg shouldn’t see that as a negative. Instead he should think of it as an honor because HHH was impressed enough to want him taken out.

Batista is that much better than Goldberg and it was him who had all those near misses over the last few weeks. Orton wants to know who the champion is now because Goldberg is DONE. In all fairness it should go back to HHH but here’s Eric Bischoff instead, carrying a bag. Bischoff rants about losing Goldberg, the man he depends on to defend the title around the world. Do you know what losing him does to Bischoff? It makes him the happiest man on the planet.

Goldberg speared Bischoff in this very ring so Eric is very pleased with these results. He pulls the title out of the bag and, since Goldberg can’t defend the title in thirty days, the new champion is…well hang on as here’s Steve Austin to interrupt. Austin reaches into the bag and pulls out a middle finger for Bischoff. Goldberg isn’t going to be stripped of the title because he’s going to be defending it at Survivor Series against HHH.

Flair is livid, despite what should be the biggest layup in the world. Austin: “Settle down before you blow your pacemaker.” That’s the bottom line and Austin goes to leave but Batista says hang on a second. That kind of disrespect sounds like Austin is looking for physical provocation. A fight is teased but here are Mark Jindrak and Garrison Cade (because WWE doesn’t learn lessons) to attack Orton and Flair.

Trish Stratus and Lita, in their underwear for obvious reasons, talk about Chris Jericho and Christian’s recent changes of heart. Lita is going to go see what she can find out.

Booker T. vs. Rico

Miss Jackie grabs Booker’s foot to start and Rico fires off the kicks to start. A chinlock goes nowhere as Jerry wants Rico to go back in the closet. The ax kick misses, Rico’s big kick misses and the ax kick finishes Rico in short order.

Post match here’s Jericho to yell at Booker for being on the wrong team at Survivor Series. He brings out the rest of Team Bischoff, now including Christian and Scott Steiner. Jericho wants the cage lowered and the big beatdown is on. Rob Van Dam comes in for the save and declares himself the newest member of Team Austin. That match is really starting to take shape.

Post break Jericho is yelling at Bischoff over Van Dam interfering. Jericho’s solution? Let him win the Intercontinental Title tonight. Bischoff agrees.

Mark Henry vs. Lance Storm

Teddy Long and Henry aren’t happy at losing the $100,000 last week and it’s time to get some payback. Henry throws him around for a few moments until Shawn Michaels runs in and superkicks Henry for the DQ. So much for Storm’s push.

Heidenreich is ready to team with Hurricane in his tag match. Hurricane mentions Little Johnny but he couldn’t be here tonight. Rosey comes up to take a picture of them and Hurricane mentions Johnny being Heidenreich’s son. Actually that’s not right and Heidenreich whispers the real story in Hurricane’s ear. The jaw drops and Rosey takes the picture, leaving Hurricane to say “and people say I’M weird for wearing a cape?”

Lita goes up to Christian in the back and wants to know what happened last week. Christian was reading her book and there’s a picture of the two of them holding hands. Apparently there was a bit of history but Lita acts like it’s nothing now. She leaves for her match, a bit flustered.

Shane McMahon has a match with a mystery opponent tonight and hopes it’s Kane.

Hurricane/Heidenreich vs. La Resistance

Conway jumps Hurricane as he tries to give his mask away but something like a backslide into the Eye of the Hurricane puts Conway down instead. Hurricane isn’t done and hits a big flip dive over the top to take Dupree down as well. Back in and Conway scores with a hanging swinging neckbreaker to really take over as Heidenreich tries to come in for the save.

We hit the USA chants (from the Army, Air Force and Marines members in the crowd) until a clothesline cuts Hurricane down for two more. It’s off to the chinlock as the announcers start with the FRANCE SUCKS jokes. A neckbreaker gets Hurricane out of trouble and it’s Heidenreich coming in to clean house. Conway eats a bicycle kick for two and a Rock Bottom is enough to put him away.

Rating: D+. Fairly boring here but good grief I’m sick of the RAH RAH RAH USA USA USA matches. I know Vince loves that kind of stuff but it’s getting a little hard to take. If nothing else, have someone better than La Resistance as the evil anti-Americans. They’ve lost most of their last few matches and it’s getting harder and harder to care.

Post match Heidenreich breaks up an attempt to wave the French flag.

Shane McMahon vs. ???

No DQ and the mystery opponent is…..Test? Well maybe not as he has a broken foot and is on crutches while wearing street clothes. He’s here to introduce the mystery opponent tonight and it’s….Test. Uh, ok then. Shane peppers him with left hands and stomps on the bad foot, sending Test to the floor to call for backup.

Shane goes up top and loads up a dive but Test pulls Stacy in front of him. With Test shouting for Kane (by name), Shane hammers away until Test sends him into the steps. But now, let’s wait for Test to shout for Kane again. A full nelson slam plants Shane but rather than covering, TEST SHOUTS FOR KANE.

It’s weapons time with Test in control until Stacy slows him down. The distraction lets Shane get in a few shots and load up the Van Terminator. Kane’s pyro goes off and Test gets in a crutch shot for two. The pumphandle slam is countered into a DDT onto the trashcan for two more and they’re both rocked. Shane chairs him into the corner and now the Van Terminator connects for the pin.

Rating: D. Let me make sure I’ve got this straight: we spent months on Test vs. Steiner and the next step is Test getting to job to Shane on Raw? I still have no idea why this needs to be Shane when he could be any given wrestler. He’s better than Stephanie due to the more logical motivation and having better matches but still, this could be anyone else who needs the spotlight.

Post match Shane accuses Kane of being scared. He should be scared, but he should be showing his face. If Kane won’t come out, he’ll offer a demonstration. That means beating Test up even more and crushing his foot on the steps with a chair. This brings Kane to the stage but no further. Shane announces that Survivor Series will be an ambulance match, which is even dumber than what they’ve been doing so far.

Trish Stratus vs. Lita vs. Gail Kim vs. Victoria

#1 contenders match. Lita knees Victoria in the corner and Trish gets two off a spinebuster. Molly, in jeans, a leather jacket and a low cut top (by her standards) is watching from the stage. That’s a rather nice look for her. Trish’s rollup gets two on Victoria and takes her down with a headscissors out of the corner.

Stevie Richards takes Trish down though and Lita gets double teamed. A powerbomb gets two on Gail and the Widow’s Peak gets the same on Lita. Victoria and Gail get in a fight with Kim being sent outside, leaving Lita to grab a DDT for the pin. Too short to rate, but it’s as rushed as you would imagine a four way that doesn’t even last three minutes to be.

Coach is getting his makeup done while reading Austin’s new book.

Video on Hawk.

Here’s Coach to review the book. He even has a podium with The Coach’s Book Review on a sign. Coach calls most of the statements in the book lies, focusing on Bischoff firing Austin from WCW. Cue Austin to offer Coach a free shot but Coach offers him the same thing. Austin has to decline but after his team wins at Survivor Series, he’d like Coach to do the post match interview because it’s the first face Austin wants to see.

Jindrak and Cade are ready to win so here’s Shawn to give them a pep talk. They go off for their match when Teddy comes in to yell about Shawn superkicking Henry. Teddy wants Henry vs. the “Heart Break Cracker” next week. Shawn says he could have cut off the rhetoric “you feel me playa?” Teddy: “Holla.” Teddy leaves so here’s Bischoff to have security escort Shawn from the arena.

JR and King thank the fans for their viewership as Raw was the highest rated cable show of the week.

Mark Jindrak/Garrison Cade vs. Ric Flair/Randy Orton

Orton and Jindrak start things off but hang on a second as MAVEN, the definition of inspiration, is here to cancel out Batista. Make your own jokes, but that speaks for itself. Cade comes in and gets stomped down before it’s off to Flair (in red, meaning he’s likely losing) for an elbow to the jaw. Orton’s dropkick gets two but a double clothesline allows the hot tag to Jindrak.

Some very nice dropkicks have Evolution in trouble but Flair rolls Jindrak up. The referee is busy though so Maven comes in, runs at Flair with his arm extended, BARELY grazes Ric’s hair, and somehow turns the rollup over to give Jindrak the pin. I had to rewind the video a few times to see how Maven could have possibly missed that. Flair didn’t duck, so yes, Maven managed to miss a still target on a running clothesline.

Rating: D. The ending is absolutely the right call (though Maven needs target practice) as the young guys getting a pin is a good thing. However, they’re just so boring and uninteresting that their win is only going to get them so far. Give them a team name (or better names in general) or some matching gear or a gimmick of some sort. Just do SOMETHING because they’re putting me to sleep.

Evolution wrecks the boring guys post match. Batista looks very good dominating people here.

Intercontinental Title: Chris Jericho vs. Rob Van Dam

Rob is defending and wastes no time with a spinning crossbody out of the corner. Jericho blocks a charge with a raised boot and a jumping enziguri gets two. They’re not exactly wasting any time here. We hit the double arm crank on the champ but Rob is quickly out and avoiding a charge into the post to send Jericho’s shoulder into the steel. Back up and the Five Star misses so Jericho can sneak in a low blow. The Walls go on but here’s Bischoff to distract the referee. As you might expect, Van Dam’s rope grab isn’t seen and Jericho pulls him back to the middle of the ring for the tap.

Rating: C-. It was fun while it lasted but it didn’t last long at all. I know Van Dam was in the ropes but he’s tapping out in less than five minutes? That’s quite the stretch and while I can buy it, you know this is going to be setting up a rematch and that’s not the worst thing in the world. These two work well enough together that I’d like to see them go at it again.

Hang on a second as Austin comes out and makes the rematch RIGHT NOW….inside of that steel cage. Bischoff runs up the ramp to yell at Austin but trips into him by mistake, meaning the chase is on.

Intercontinental Title: Chris Jericho vs. Rob Van Dam

Jericho is defending inside a cage. Joined in progress with Rob in trouble thanks to the weakened back. A missed dropkick makes things even worse and Jericho drops an elbow for good measure. It’s off to the backbreaker with Jericho bending the back over his knee (thank goodness for mixing up the holds) as the back is banged up even worse.

Rob sends him into the cage a few times for his first offense but it’s too early to go over the top. Instead Jericho pulls him down and slams him off the top. This time it’s Jericho going up but Rob pulls him back down and they fall down to the mat in a double heap. Rob pulls him in again and superkicks him off the ropes before going over the top. Jericho goes for the door but Rob kicks it into his head and wins the title back.

Rating: D+. Well ok then. I guess the idea here is to show the power struggle between Bischoff and Austin, just in case the last four months didn’t explain that in enough detail. The match was, again, too short to mean anything but at least they both get a second reign out of the thing. That Jericho reign is probably shorter than Dean Douglas’ though, so at least we got some history out of the thing.

Post match Christian and Steiner come in to destroy Van Dam. Cue the Dudleys through the crowd to even things up but Mark Henry comes in as well. Teddy locks the cage as the beating is on so here’s Booker T. to dive off the top of the cage. Henry shrugs it off and hits a bunch of World’s Strongest Slams to end the show. They certainly added to that match in a hurry.

Overall Rating: D. This is a give and take show. While there’s nothing good in the way of wrestling, there is a clear plan for where most (if not all) of these stories are going. You can see a lot of Survivor Series from here and that’s a major upgrade over the meandering stories that basically came down to “how can we make HHH look good”. While not a good show, it’s actually a positive sign for the future and that’s not something you get too often on Raw.

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IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: October 20, 2003
Location: Casey Plaza, Wilkes Barre, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s still all about Goldberg and the bounty but this time he has a slightly better opponent with Shawn Michaels getting his shot. We’re also getting ready for Survivor Series in a few weeks, meaning things should be picking up in short order. Then again, that’s never stopped WWE before. Let’s get to it.

Here’s last week’s show if you need a recap.

In Memory of Hawk.

We recap the bounty angle, which hopefully picks up speed tonight.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Steve Austin to get things going. Austin came here earlier today and found a note. Someone wants him in the ring at nine o’clock, which means there’s someone back there who wants to physically provoke him. This brings out Test, on crutches, with Stacy Keibler in toe. Test yells at her for taking too long to hold the door open and says he sent the note. He’d love to beat Austin up right now but can’t because of the broken foot. He wants an apology for the injury and another one for what happened to Stacy last week.

Austin gives both of them a middle finger instead and hopes Stacy learned a lesson: what Austin offers you a beer, you either decline with a smile or drink until you pass out. Stacy is about to respond but Test tells her not to speak unless he tells her to. Austin would love to beat up any kind of a man, including a crippled man. A fight is teased but Test won’t provoke him. Instead, Stacy shoves Test into Austin and you know what that means.

Before beer can be consumed, Eric Bischoff comes up on screen to mock Austin for not being able to hit anyone. Austin agrees, so Bischoff suggests they assemble teams for Survivor Series with that rule being gone vs. Austin being gone. The Board of Directors has already approved of this and Bischoff already has Chris Jericho and Scott Steiner signed up for his team. Jericho asks Austin if he’s in and of course the match is on. Stacy intercepts the beer and drinks it herself to Lawler’s delight.

Shane McMahon is waiting for Kane. Egads get us to Survivor Series already so this thing can be done.

Tag Team Titles: Dudley Boyz vs. La Resistance

The Dudleys are defending and have dedicated the match to Hawk. D-Von and Conway start things off but a blind tag allows Dupree to come in with a dropkick to take over. The flying shoulder is mistimed and turns into a flying forearm instead but it still manages to send Dupree outside. Conway forearms D-Von down though and Dupree adds a Hennig necksnap. He throws in the dance too and of course Bubba is ready to kill him as a result. Bubba is likely more of a Saturday Night Fever fan.

It’s off to the chinlock for a bit until D-Von hits an enziguri (what an odd visual) to escape for the hot tag. That means a Flip Flop and Fly but D-Von gets crotched on top so the French guys can take over again. The double spinebuster gets two and there’s the USA chant. For some reason that doesn’t fire Conway up as he’s taken down with a reverse implant DDT. The Doomsday Device retains the titles.

Rating: D. The ending was a nice moment as you can imagine how big of an influence the Legion of Doom was on the Dudleys. La Resistance is better with Conway in the lineup but it’s still not like the team is anything more than a middle of the pack act at best. Thankfully they didn’t do another title change here and the Doomsday Device gave me a bit of a smile.

Bischoff gives Jericho and Steiner a pep talk before their tag match tonight. An argument breaks out over who is the leader. That’s the last thing Bischoff wants but Jericho says it’ll be fine.

Evolution promises that the bounty will be collected tonight. Booker T. comes in and says he’s ready to make a statement because the path to the Intercontinental Title begins right now. Randy Orton doesn’t buy it but Booker wants to fight right now.

Booker T. vs. Randy Orton

Joined in progress with Booker chopping Orton, in street clothes, up against the ropes. A hot shot and the backbreaker give Orton two and we hit the double arm crank. Booker is right back with a spinning kick to the face and the side kick but Orton takes the countout.

Rating: D+. This was more of an angle than a match though I could go for seeing more of these two together. Booker being back is a nice addition to the show but it’s not going to matter if he doesn’t have anyone to fight. That being said, he’d be a good choice for the Survivor Series team which is a fine way to get him back to speed.

Post match, Booker volunteers to be on Austin’s team. Makes perfect sense.

Raw World Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Goldberg

Shawn is challenging. And never mind as Mark Henry jumps Goldberg during his big entrance. No match.

Post break, Austin finds out what happened (because I guess he was petting his dog) and is ready to go throw Henry out of the building. The match is uncertain.

Chris Jericho/Scott Steiner vs. Rob Van Dam/Lance Storm

Steiner and Van Dam start things off with Scott saying Rob’s arms “don’t have diddly squat”. Those are fighting words so Rob kicks away, followed by a crossbody for an early two. The cartwheel moonsault gets two more and it’s off to Storm for a leg lariat. Jericho comes in and the silence when Storm is on offense is very noticeable. Storm escapes a wristlock by standing on the ropes and backflipping out, meaning it’s time for some posing.

A Steiner distraction lets Jericho knock Storm into the barricade though, followed by a loud whip into the steps. We hit the chinlock as Steiner is already running out of offense. The announcers recap the show as Storm makes his comeback, only to get suplexed right back down. As usual it’s a good looking suplex from Steiner and far more effective when he only uses one. Jericho comes in and does some pushups, followed by the loud chops in the corner.

That’s fine with Storm, who jumps from the mat to the top rope for a back elbow to the jaw. That kind of thing never stops impressing me. Van Dam comes in for the kicks and a northern lights suplex for two on Jericho. The bouncing kick is left short so Jericho grabs a rollup with feet on the ropes for two of his own. Everything breaks down with Storm diving onto Steiner and Van Dam flipping out of a Walls attempt. Steiner gets in a chair to Van Dam’s back though and the Lionsault is good for the pin.

Rating: C. I’m still a big fan of Storm (that athleticism is very impressive) but having a gimmick of “I’m not boring anymore” isn’t going to work. He’s just not charismatic (which he himself will admit) and I’m not sure how to turn him into a star that fans want to see. I’m not sure how good of a fit he would be on the Survivor Series team, though that’s definitely where the story seems to be going.

The trainer tells Bischoff that Goldberg might not be able to defend the title. Bischoff thinks it’s an act but Goldberg says it’s on.

JR and King pay tribute to Hawk and Stu Hart.

Video on Stu, with Vince narrating.

Flair is on the phone with someone (presumably Teddy Long) and says no money because Goldberg is still up. There’s a backup option though.

Jericho comes up to Trish Stratus in the back and says there’s no need to thank him for last week. Trish says he doesn’t have to be Chris Jericho here and sincerely thanks him for what he did. Last week wasn’t about Austin though, because Jericho really respects her. Things get a little awkward and they leave. I’m really glad we’re finally to this story as it’s always been a personal favorite.

Mark Jindrak and Garrison Cade come in to see Orton about collecting the bounty. They had another idea in mind: beating Orton down and stealing the money. A left hand staggers Orton and the briefcase is stolen.

Post break Orton is panicking when he runs into Flair. Orton doesn’t tell him the truth and says he’ll hang in the back instead of going out there with Flair. Ric wants Orton to show Shawn the money one more time before the title match.

Trish Stratus/Lita vs. Molly Holly/Victoria

Lawler is now referring to Molly as “Molly Hottie”, ignoring those times where he thought she was fat and rather unattractive. Good to see that he found some strong glasses. Trish and Victoria start things off but Molly comes in after just a few seconds. Apparently Trish isn’t a fan of fast tags as she chops Molly in the corner but a Stevie Richards distraction lets the villains take over.

The always cool looking spinning side slam gets two and it’s back to Molly for the same off a swinging neckbreaker. The Molly Go Round misses and that’s enough to bring Lita in. Everything breaks down and Molly gets hiptossed but Stevie sneaks in with a powerbomb to give Victoria the cheap pin on Trish.

Rating: D+. The matches aren’t terrible but it would be nice if someone actually remembered that there’s a title to fight over in this division. I can’t remember the last time Molly defended the thing and I can’t remember the last time she wasn’t considered one of the lower level names in the division, which defeats the point of being a champion. At least there’s a story though, and that’s a lot better than what the division has seen in a long time.

Post match the beatdown stays on with Victoria putting the Women’s Title over Lita’s face. The slingshot legdrop is loaded up but Christian runs in for the save. And the plot thickens.

We look back at Henry attacking Goldberg.

Maven vs. Ric Flair

Maven isn’t waiting for the WOOing and decks Flair in the jaw to start us off. A backdrop on the floor keeps Flair in trouble but the referee grabs Maven’s punch. You know, which is done so consistently. Flair gets in a cheap shot to take over and it’s time to rip the skin off of Maven’s chest in the corner. We hit the chinlock as JR says Cade and Jindrak took advantage of an opportunity. There’s the knee drop but Maven pops up and wins a slugout to near silence. Flair is of course one step ahead though and grabs a rollup with trunks for the fast pin.

Rating: D. Now can we drop the Maven experiment please? There’s no upside to Maven here and he’s nothing more than a jobber to the stars with big eyebrows. The wrestling isn’t any good and losing to Flair in about four minutes isn’t going to make the fans care about his lame offense and low level charisma.

In the back, Orton finally tells Flair what happened but they know they can figure it out before HHH kills them. Cops come running up and we follow them to Kane.

Here’s a cut up Kane in the arena with the cops guarding the entrance. This whole thing with Shane started with Linda, who thought she could stop the monster. Everyone has thought they can control her but Linda found out differently. Linda was squirming for her very life and screaming no, but Kane learned a long time ago that no means yes. Kane likes hurting people and it felt so good.

Now Shane thinks he can stop Kane, but throwing him into a burning dumpster didn’t stop him, just like crashing a limo didn’t do it either. Kane will do anything he wants to Shane and there is no line that he won’t cross. Shane is done at Survivor Series but his pain has just begun.

Jindrak and Cade try to leave but get attacked by HHH with a 2×4.

Post break, HHH comes in to yell at Flair and Orton but Ric blames it all on Orton in a funny bit. HHH actually hands Orton the briefcase again and says don’t let it happen again. They’ll be watching the match in the back and HHH guarantees that the bounty is collected tonight.

Raw World Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Goldberg

Shawn is challenging. Goldberg shoves him down with ease to start so Shawn starts sticking and moving. Some kicks to the knees and a dropkick to the side of the head have Goldberg in trouble but he’s right back with a gorilla press. Shawn takes a breather on the floor and he manages to shove Goldberg over the top in a surprising bit of power. Back in and Goldberg launches him into the corner but gets forearmed down. The power vs. speed stuff is working so far.

A powerslam cuts Shawn off but Goldberg is too banged up from the Henry attack. Goldberg scores with a military press but the spear hit the referee because of course it does. The superkick connects (see my previous because of course it does) to put everyone down. We get a replacement referee for the double count, despite Shawn only having been slammed a few times. Cue the returning Batista to send Shawn into the steps as the match is thrown out.

Rating: C-. This didn’t have time to go anywhere and that’s a shame as Shawn would seem to be someone capable of getting the best out of Goldberg. Batista returning is a great thing though as the three man Evolution really wasn’t working. Hopefully he’s gotten better in his time away, as the look is only going to take him so far.

The Batista Bomb plants Goldberg and Batista Pillmanizes Goldberg’s ankle. Evolution comes out and hands Batista the money to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Much better show than in recent weeks, though that’s not the hardest goal to achieve. The big thing here was they moved things forward towards Survivor Series with Batista returning to injure Goldberg and the announcement of the big elimination match. The wrestling was really pretty lame here but the storytelling was good, which is what matters a lot more in this case. Not a good show, but a step in the right direction.

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IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: October 6, 2003
Location: Mohegan Sun Arena, Uncasville, Connecticut
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

After last week’s show, the big story is HHH playing Harley Race to Goldberg’s Ric Flair by putting out a $100,000 bounty on anyone who can take Goldberg out. That opens a lot of doors for the company and WWE has decided to go through the Mark Henry door. To be fair though….actually there’s not much of a positive way to go with this. Let’s get to it.

Here’s last week’s show if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of HHH issuing the bounty. I know it’s an old story but it works perfectly well for what they needed it to be.

Opening sequence.

Kane vs. Rosey

Fallout from last week. Rosey wastes no time in knocking Kane down and hitting a splash for an early two. That’s about it for Rosey’s offense though as Kane pops back up and hits Rosey in the face. Choking in the corner keeps him in trouble and something like a spinebuster plants Rosey again. Rosey is right back up with a corner splash and a DDT but a legdrop wakes Kane up for some reason. A roll underneath a clothesline gives Rosey an opening but he walks right into a chokeslam for the pin.

Rating: D. Rosey was trying here but Kane has already fallen all the way down to fighting comedy acts. I mean, Shane isn’t going to be taken seriously a lot of the time but he’s a step above these two at the moment. Also, if you need teams as badly as this “division” does, I see very little value in building them up and then having Kane decimate both members in short order.

Post match Hurricane comes out but gets beaten down as well. Cue the returning Shane to come in through the crowd for some cheap shots before bailing.

Post break, Kane is looking for Shane in the production trucks. After scaring some production workers, it’s back to the parking lot where Shane is just standing there. Shane dives into a limo and Kane can’t get in so he blasts the back window with a pipe. For some reason he THROWS THE PIPE DOWN THROUGH THE SUN ROOF and goes in after it, only to have Shane slip out. With Kane in the back, Shane rigs up the limo to drive forward on its own, sending it crashing into a big truck for a massive crash. JR and King go into serious mode and we cut to an abrupt commercial.

Back with medics trying to get the very bloody Kane out of the limo. It’s so tragic (and spontaneous) that we have about five different camera angles of the crash. The jaws of life are brought in as Steve Austin shows up to see if Kane is alive. Austin: “Is he still alive?” Steve never was that subtle.

Gail Kim vs. Lita

Molly Holly sits in on commentary because you can switch from segment to segment that quickly. At least she sounds shaken up. The place just goes nuts for Lita again, which is becoming the norm in a hurry. Lita gets in some right hands in the corner and thankfully Lawler isn’t being his usual self in a women’s match. A suplex looks to set up a Vader Bomb (which is WAY off target) but Gail gets her knees up.

We hit the chinlock as Gail continues to show off that great offense. She tries a neck crank, which means putting one hand on top of Lita’s tilted head and resting the other on her shoulder. You can’t even grab her chin??? A dragon sleeper looks better and a basement dropkick drops Lita again. Gail points to her head because she’s smart enough to hit a dropkick you see. Lita gets in a Russian legsweep for a breather and a spinning belly to back suplex (the Lita Bomb according to JR) is good for two.

Back up and Gail jumps from the middle rope onto Lita’s back in what I think was supposed to be a bulldog but wound up being more like a Thesz press from behind. Not that it matters as Gail rolls too far and gets cradled for two, making that move such a mess that I had to watch it twice to see what happened. Thankfully Lita finishes with the DDT a few seconds later.

Rating: F+. What the heck was that? This was just a few steps ahead of last year’s Jackie Gayda match with Gail managing to mess up things as simple as a neck crank (grab head with both hands and tilt). It’s kind of amazing that they had such solid tag matches in the last few weeks but had this bad of a singles match. I knew Molly was good but I didn’t realize she and Trish were holding things together that well.

Eric Bischoff tries to get to Kane but firemen hold him back.

HHH has a bunch of $100 bills laid out in a path to the briefcase full of cash. The question of the day is who will take Goldberg out. That kind of money could change someone’s life and buy a lot of things. It might even buy someone into Evolution. It could be Goldberg’s best friend, so the question is who’s next, because everybody’s got a price. Goldberg has friends?

Shawn Michaels wants Mark Henry tonight but Austin says no.

Scott Steiner comes out for his match with a defeated Stacy Keibler at his side. All Steiner cares about are his freaks and his peaks but sometimes the freaks mess up. Steiner recaps the Unforgiven loss and wants an apology with Stacy on her knees. This brings out Bischoff who says he’s glad to see the Big Poppa Pump that he’s known for years. As a thank you, Bischoff has hand picked Steiner’s opponent. JR: “Maybe Steiner is going to get what he deserves!” JR, if you’re going to be stupid, just be quiet.

Scott Steiner vs. Spike Dudley

Joined in progress with Steiner pressing him to the floor….and let’s cut to the bloody Kane being removed from the limo. Back in the arena, Steiner is suplexing Spike like he’s…well like he’s Spike Dudley actually. JR gets annoyed at Lawler for asking how he can call this match as Spike comes back with a running headbutt to the ribs. The Dudley Dog is countered with a suplex and the push-up elbow sets up the Downward Spiral for the pin. Not enough shown to rate due to the Kane thing but it was Spike Dudley vs. Scott Steiner. I think you can figure it out pretty easily.

Post match Steiner gives him a super Angle Slam but the Dudleys run in for the save. Test comes out and pulls Steiner away from a 3D.

Goldberg beats up La Resistance for trying to collect the bounty. I love how their method was just beating him up instead of, you know, hitting him with a pipe or something.

Back at the limo, Bischoff asks a witness what he saw. THE WHOLE THING WAS SHOWN ON TV! Anyway Bischoff blames it on Austin, including if Kane dies tonight.

Here’s Chris Jericho, flanked by Coach, Lance Storm and Christian, for a chat. Jericho isn’t surprised by what happened to Kane because Austin is causing all of this. It was Austin who told Kane to unleash his inner monster and that’s messed up the entire show. We’re in Connecticut tonight and Jericho wants to appeal to the board of directors: Austin needs to be relieved of all of his power here on Raw.

Jericho even has testimonials from people whose careers have been ruined by Austin, starting with Coach. Everyone knows Coach and Al Snow won fair and square at Unforgiven but Austin wouldn’t have that. Instead Austin gave his boy JR a rematch so the teams changed again. Now Coach is backstage doing interviews again despite being the best looking option.

Next up is Christian, who retained the Intercontinental Title both at Unforgiven and then the next night on Raw. Then Austin called him a CLB and made him defend the title in a ladder match! We see some highlights from the match with Rob Van Dam winning the title and it’s all Austin’s fault.

That leaves us with Storm, who Jericho says has been deemed boring. Now he’s reduced to coming to the ring to watered down techno music and doing a bad dance. Storm says Jericho is completely wrong though, because Storm is having fun, meaning we get a little dance. He thinks Austin is doing a great job as GM while Jericho is doing a great job of being a jack***.

The beatdown is on but Austin comes out….and doesn’t change much as Jericho is smart enough to realize Austin can’t do anything. Van Dam comes out for the real save and Austin complains about not being able to fight. The tag match is made for right now. This was all it needed to be and I could go with Storm getting a bigger push as a result.

Lance Storm/Rob Van Dam vs. Christian/Chris Jericho

The villains take their time getting in so we’re joined in progress with Rob in trouble. That’s broken up with a kick to the chest and it’s off to Storm….as the fans go silent. An enziguri takes Jericho down but he’s up fast enough to break up the Maple Leaf. Everything breaks down and Rob dives onto Jericho for a double knockdown. Storm hits a better looking dive and throws Christian back inside, only to get beaten down.

Jericho knocks him off the top and drops Storm face first onto the exposed barricade. We hit the chinlock for a bit until Christian throws Lance into the corner for a good stomping. The Walls are reversed so Jericho settles for a dropkick instead. Storm knocks Jericho back though and rolls over for the tag to Van Dam as things speed up again.

The middle rope kick to the face and a hot shot have Jericho in trouble. A split legged moonsaut gives Rob two and Christian is dropped onto Jericho for the, ahem, suggestive landing. Rolling Thunder onto both gets two and Rob scores with the Five Star on the illegal Christian. Jericho is back in with the Lionsault for two and grabs the Walls but Storm tags himself in. A missile dropkick finishes Jericho to give Storm the big pin.

Rating: B. Take four talented guy, let them have some time, and get a good match. On top of that, Storm gets a rub by pinning Jericho clean. That’s the kind of thing they need to do: elevate some people and see what they can do. If Storm can get a following or some charisma, he could be quite a solid midcard player.

Another recap of the car crash.

Teddy Long says Mark Henry destroying Shawn Michaels last week will go down in wrestling history. Long needs to stick to thuggin n buggin because history isn’t his strong suit. Henry is going to claim the bounty and then win the World Heavyweight Title.

Randy Orton/Ric Flair vs. Mark Jindrak/Garrison Cade

Yes they’re still trying to make this team work. Orton works on Cade’s arm to start with JR saying these are two of the best young stars in WWE. An uppercut puts Cade down and a clothesline does the same to Jindrak. The announcers discuss books as Jindrak backdrops Flair to silence.

It’s back to Cade as this crowd is almost eerily silent. Flair takes over again as I’m wondering why WWE thinks Cade/Jindrak getting squashed is a good idea. Cade’s right hands don’t work and something like a bulldog to Orton is greeted by the same silence. Jindrak does the top rope spinning clothesline and a spinebuster/dropkick combination drops Flair. Not that it matters as Orton RKO’s Jindrak to give Flair the pin.

Rating: F. I don’t often notice the crowd reactions but EGADS this was bad. Not that the wrestling itself was the worst but there was no fire, no heat and no interest from anyone. Hopefully this ends the sticking of the toe into the Jindrak and Cade water because it’s completely not working.

During the break, Flair and Orton were celebrating when they ran into Maven and Trish Stratus. Maven doesn’t think much of the win and asks about a rematch with Cade and Jindrak (SOMEONE SHUT THAT MAN UP!). Flair tells Maven to shut up and a match is made for next week. Ric: “I’ve had more World Championships than you’ve had women.” I take it that’s a yes.

Steven Richards/Victoria vs. Maven/Trish Stratus

Fallout from Victoria joining forces with Molly and Victoria because there isn’t another worthy woman to team with Trish against Molly and Victoria here. Richards chops Maven in the corner but walks into an atomic drop. Maven’s good looking dropkick doesn’t get much of a reaction but a tag to Trish gets….well it’s not much but at least it’s something. The Thesz press (with Victoria sliding underneath Trish, who landed off to the side) has Victoria in trouble and a Matrish into a hurricanrana puts her down again.

Richards breaks up the Stratusphere though and Victoria hits a slingshot double legdrop to the chest. It’s off to a bearhug and Lawler is back to his normal self about the visuals. Trish shoves her away and brings in Maven for the clotheslines. Everything breaks down and Victoria gets kicked to the floor. A Chick Kick to Richards sets up Maven’s spinning faceplant for the pin.

Rating: D. Still not good but at least Maven and Trish had some good looking stuff. This was another bad tag match though and that’s not what this show needed in front of a dead crowd. The young guys are terrible right now and someone like Maven, who was supposed to be a bigger deal off of Tough Enough, isn’t doing anyone any favors.

Post match Victoria sends Trish into the steps.

Mark Henry vs. Goldberg

Non-title and Rodney Mack is sent to the back. Goldberg charges into the ring in a rare visual and Henry pounds him down to start. Some corner splashes crush Goldberg again and there’s a gorilla press drop. Three straight clotheslines don’t do much damage to Henry, who comes back with a Rock Bottom of all things for two. Another splash hurts Goldberg’s ribs and a shoulder breaker switches things up to the arm. Goldberg gets in an armbreaker to slow Henry down a bit but a Boss Man Slam cuts Goldberg down again. A slam looks to set up the spear but here’s Mack with a chair for the DQ.

Rating: D-. Somehow that’s the second best of the final three matches. This was Goldberg being destroyed for a few minutes and then not even getting to pin Henry. Let me repeat that: Goldberg, who won the World Title less than a month ago, isn’t getting to pin Mark Henry. I have no idea how this is supposed to make sense other than setting up another match later on, because GOLDBERG isn’t allowed to get a clean win here. If they wanted to further kill the crowd, they somehow managed to pull it off.

Post match Shawn runs in to superkick Mack, only to have Goldberg miss Henry and spear Shawn by mistake. Goldberg gives Henry the Jackhammer to end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. Somehow this show wound up being about Shane McMahon’s attempted murder of Kane and HHH, who wasn’t actually on the show. Other than that it was a bunch of terrible matches (save for that one rather good tag match), even more recaps/updates on Kane nearly dying and blaming Austin for everything. This show left me deflated, and that’s not a good sign when we have over a month before the next time these guys are on pay per view. Absolutely terrible here with the main focuses being Shane and Goldberg keeping the title warm for HHH. Figure out what the fans want, because this isn’t it.

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