Monday Night Raw
Date: April 11, 2005
Location: Mark of the Quad Cities, Moline, Illinois
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Things should be getting back to normal around here as we are now into the regular shows instead of last week’s Wrestlemania fallout. Somehow that means more HHH this week, as last week he announced his rematch clause. Odds are that comes at Backlash at the end of the month, because we need to build to a HHH match you see. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Trish Stratus/Molly Holly vs. Victoria/Christy Hemme

Dang we’re starting with a match? Molly and Victoria fight over arm control to start with Victoria grabbing some armdrags. The dancing moonsault gets two and it’s off to Christy for the kicks to the leg. The splits legdrop gets two more but Trish gets in a cheap shot from the apron to take over. Trish comes in for a chop to the “chest area” as JR puts it, followed by a choke in the corner.

It’s back to Molly for a basement dropkick and we hit the half crab. That’s broken up and Victoria gets to come in for some elbows to the face. Trish breaks up the Widow’s Peak though, meaning it’s back to Molly for some hair takedowns. Another shot hits Trish and Molly’s handspring elbow does as well, allowing Christy to grab a rollup for the pin.

Rating: D. They’re trying with Christy and while it’s not working, they are in fact trying. I know the women’s division isn’t much at the moment but you can’t just throw someone out there with the bare minimum of training and expect it to work. She looks like she’s working as hard as she can so the fault isn’t with her, as she has no business being in this spot.

Not the worst match here, though it was Molly’s last regular match in the company. She hasn’t said why she left but it’s sad to see her go. While she wasn’t the most exciting member of the roster, she was always good for a solid performance and her backstage reputation is one of the best you’ll ever see. The division could use her here (or now) but she has more than earned the right to walk away.

Post match Trish gets knocked to the floor so here’s Kane to chase her off in revenge for what Trish did to Lita last week. Points for continuity at least.

We look at Randy Orton’s shoulder surgery in Birmingham, Alabama. It’s some graphic footage as we see the surgery taking place. They do a nice job of mentioning that Undertaker and Batista hurt the shoulder, which is always better than saying “oh he’s hurt and needs surgery”. He’ll be out about four months.

We go to the women’s locker room where Stacy Keibler is glad for what happened. Candice Michelle wants Batista to take her out and pin her. Maria agrees but they all freak out when Kane chases Trish inside. But they’re cool with the camera in there broadcasting live. They were watching the video on the monitor, so what was airing on the monitor when it was filming them and they were still looking at the monitor? These things keep me up nights.

Coach talks to Muhammad Hassan, who thinks Shawn Michaels should go home and watch some unfunny American sitcom instead of getting a beating. Keeping his promos short is better. The delivery is good but he repeats the same stuff so many times that it gets old.

Here’s HHH for a chat because it’s HHH and this is Raw. He hypes up Batista’s first interview as World Champion but he better enjoy it because it’s borrowed time. The rematch is signed for Backlash and while Batista was awesome at Wrestlemania, HHH will find a weakness before Backlash. HHH is ready this time now because Batista’s eyes have betrayed him.

There is one thing that Batista fears and it will make HHH an eleven time World Champion. That would be the Pedigree and all of this will be set right at Backlash. Cue Hurricane to interrupt, talking about how the last time he saw HHH, he was wearing a crimson mask. HHH calls him a green tomato, so Hurricane calls him out for beating up both he and Rosey a few weeks back. Tonight, it’s payback! As well as CLOBBERING TIME. The double team is on in a hurry with a splash in the corner and a double clothesline to the floor. HHH grabs a mic and says get a ref out here.

HHH vs. Rosey/Hurricane

The referee won’t let HHH use a chair so he gets knocked down again. We take a very early break and come back with HHH punching Hurricane down for two and grabbing a front facelock. The spinebuster plants Hurricane but he gets a boot up in the corner so HHH can stagger a lot. The diving tag brings in Rosey for the spinning legdrop and the running splash in the corner crushes HHH again. It’s back to Hurricane for a guillotine legdrop but he goes up again and gets crotched this time. Rosey gets tied up in the ropes like a goof and the Pedigree finishes Hurricane.

Rating: D. This was exactly what you had to expect here and there is nothing wrong with that. Hurricane and Rosey aren’t doing anything at the moment so having HHH beat them up doesn’t hurt anything. Rosey getting stuck in the rope was as perfect of a way for him to lose as you could get as he’s a big goof who can’t do anything right most of the time.

Post match HHH says that’s a warning for Batista, who is getting Pedigreed tonight. Rosey gets a Pedigree on the floor for a bonus.

Video on the Australia tour.

Batista and Chris Benoit have a moment backstage.

Chris Masters highlight package, because he’s done enough to have a highlight package.

Chris Masters vs. Seth Skyfire

Skyfire was a good hand from OVW around this time. Masters works on the arm to start before kneeing away in the corner. A heck of a toss sends Skyfire flying and he gets Polish Hammered out of the air. The Master Lock finishes Skyfire in a hurry as what sound like BORING chants start up.

Post match Masters offers to put up $1000 to anyone who thinks they can break the Master Lock. So he’s the modern Sgt. Slaughter?

We look at Muhammad Hassan attacking Shawn Michaels last week.

Shawn Michaels vs. Muhammad Hassan

Or not as Hassan does the old “beat this guy before you get me” deal, meaning it’s Daivari time instead.

Shawn Michaels vs. Daivari

The chase lets Daivari stomp away until Shawn starts chopping away so Hassan runs down. That’s enough for Daivari to snap his throat across the top and the beatdown is actually on, including a guillotine legdrop for two. The chinlock goes on for all of a few seconds before Shawn fights up and hits the forearm. Hassan breaks up the top rope elbow so Shawn goes after him, allowing Daivari to try and bring in the bell. That’s enough of a distraction for Hassan to hit Shawn low and give Daivari a fast pin.

Post break, Bischoff tells Shawn he can face Hassan and Daivari at Backlash but he has to get a partner.

It’s time for the Highlight Reel, with Chris Jericho being proud of how Money in the Bank (“My idea.”) went. However, something has been bothering him and that was the way he lost the Intercontinental Title to Shelton Benjamin. Therefore, let’s get his guest out there: Shelton Benjamin.

Shelton doesn’t think much of Jericho’s problems because he had a shot last week and lost. Jericho laughs off Shelton’s six months as champion because he’s held the title seven times (for a total of about six months between those seven reigns). Shelton makes it serious by saying he can take his fist and make more hits than the last Fozzy album so the fight is on. Neither came off great here, though the Fozzy line was good.

Smackdown rebound.

Kane finds Lita, who is VERY pleased with what he did to Trish. Kissing ensues, as we completely forget their previous history.

Here’s Shawn for a follow up chat. We get a patriotic speech about how his family has volunteered to go fight before and now he needs a partner who feels as passionately about this as he does. Shawn literally gets down on his knees and begs Hulk Hogan for one more match to a rather positive response.

Christian vs. Chris Benoit

Benoit has a bad arm and Christian has Tyson Tomko with him as usual. Hold on though as Edge comes out for commentary with JR being a bit surprised. Edge: “It takes him a while. The cowboy hat cuts off circulation.” Christian jumps Benoit to start and gets chopped down but an early hammerlock has Benoit in trouble. An enziguri sends Christian back into the corner as Benoit continues to improve when injured.

A trip to the floor goes badly for Benoit so Christian can choke away back inside. Benoit is right back again and takes it to the floor, only to have Christian go right back to the arm. The armbar goes on as Edge rants about how unfairly he has been treated. JR: “Wah wah. If your aunt was more amply endowed, she would be your uncle.” Benoit knocks him hard off the apron and into the barricade as we take a break.

Back with Benoit fighting out of an armbar but charging into a boot to the arm. Christian goes for the turnbuckle pad and the distraction means the small package only gets two. Tomko sneaks in a shot to the arm and JR rants about Edge not complaining about the cheating. JR losing his mind over stuff is almost always entertaining so I’ll take that.

The hammerlock goes on as Lawler complains about JR playing favorites. That’s a new development? Benoit pops off a German suplex but can’t follow up, meaning the armbar goes on. This lets Edge and Lawler tee off on JR for complaining about Christian and predicting all the ways JR will cheer for Benoit’s comeback. Back up and a hard collision gives us a double knockdown as Edge wants to know why Shawn Michaels gets praised for losing at Wrestlemania while no one is talking about his big win.

Benoit snaps off a suplex as Edge goes off about Benoit getting all of Edge’s chances last year. The Sharpshooter goes on but Christian is in the ropes pretty quickly. That’s fine with Benoit who rolls the German suplexes, only to miss the Swan Dive thanks to a Tomko distraction. An Unprettier attempt is countered into the Crossface so Edge takes a chair down to the ring. Benoit is already dealing with Tomko but is fine enough to dropkick the chair into Edge as well. That’s enough of a distraction for the Unprettier to give Christian the win.

Rating: B. This was a very good match that was elevated by the commentary. Edge and Lawler were scoring on JR every chance they had here and JR just had nothing to say to either of them because they were absolutely right. Edge is on a roll right now and that briefcase is making things more interesting than usual. Christian needed a win like this too and the match getting twenty minutes was almost hard to believe.

JR brings out Batista for his first interview as champion. Batista is ready to fight so HHH can come out here and try to Pedigree him. He isn’t worried about HHH, Edge and others gunning for him because it comes with being champion. He’s the predator and the World Heavyweight Champion so he’s on top of the food chain. If anyone wants to try and take his title, he’ll chew them up, spit them out, and enjoy doing it.

The fear HHH sees is in his own eyes because he is underestimating Batista again, and that will be his downfall. Batista doesn’t plan on being a ten time World Champion because he’ll be champion as long as he wants. Cue HHH from behind and the fight is on. A Pedigree attempt is backdropped over the top, so HHH grabs the mic and announces that he’ll face JR next week in Madison Square Garden. I would ask why but the response is just going to make my head hurt.

Overall Rating: D+. This was a complete one match show with nothing outside of the battling Canadians being worth much. Everything else was either bad or just uninteresting, with Chris Masters looking like the latest flop in a long line of them. Hogan/Michaels teaming together could be interesting, but that’s going to be a huge blow to Hassan. Just not a very interesting show, as Wrestlemania is already seeming like a distant memory.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: April 4, 2005
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 16,653
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the show after Wrestlemania and that means that means it’s time for the season premiere. Batista won the Raw World Title last night and hopefully changed things for a long time to come around here. We’ve seen the HHH show for so many years now and last year’s summer break with Chris Benoit on top didn’t really change anything. Maybe Batista can do a little better so let’s get to it.

Here are last night’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a nice long Wrestlemania recap video, cut together with the Gladiator trailer. That’s how the show should start.

And here’s HHH because the guy who lost the title is more important than the person who won the thing. HHH takes his sweet time talking and doesn’t like the BATISTA chants. He finally admits that he lost the title last night but rest assured that this is NOT the beginning of the Batista Era because Batista was great for one night. HHH is great every night so the title will come back to him. He’ll get his rematch, presumably at Backlash, and take the title back. At least it was short.

Intercontinental Title: Chris Jericho vs. Christian vs. Shelton Benjamin

Benjamin is defending and they’re all banged up. Christian tries to talk some trash to start and gets punched in the face for his efforts. Shelton isn’t sure who to go after so he knocks Christian down as well, only to get in an argument with Jericho over who gets to beat Christian up in the corner. Those are fighting actions to Jericho, who sends Christian outside and punches Shelton in the face.

Shelton’s crossbody gets two so Jericho bulldogs him down. Christian breaks up the Lionsault though and takes Jericho’s place, setting up a neckbreaker for two on Shelton. Jericho gets knocked off the apron and we hit the chinlock. With that going nowhere, Christian goes up top but the other two are right there for a Tower of Doom to put them all down.

Jericho enziguris Christian and grabs the sleeper drop on Shelton for two before rolling them both up at the same time for two more. Shelton is back up with a Stinger Splash for two on Christian with Jericho making a save. The exploder hits Jericho but Tomko pulls Shelton outside for a kick to the face to give Christian two. The Walls have Christian in trouble (Lawler: “DON’T TAP CAP!”) but Shelton springboards in with the bulldog to pin Jericho and retain.

Rating: B. I might have to raise the rating a bit just for DON’T TAP CAP. This was rather energetic with all three working hard and hitting their big stuff with a rather creative finish. You can’t just have people do their finishers all the time so throwing in a surprise like this is a welcome change. Shelton has been champion for a long time now and he’s gone from a surprise winner to an established guy as the title has done a lot for him, as it’s supposed to do.

Edge signs his Money in the Bank contract so Eric Bischoff is ready for the title match tonight. That’s not happening because Edge is saving it for later. This annoys Bischoff, who gives Edge a match with Chris Benoit instead.

Here’s Randy Orton for a chat. Orton says it wasn’t supposed to happen like it did because he came THIS close to making history. He even countered the chokeslam into the RKO but that wasn’t enough. That’s why he tried the Tombstone but he felt something snap in his shoulder and then he was looking up at the lights.

Then he was in the back, looking up at the monitor and seeing Batista as the new World Heavyweight Champion. That was different because he respects Undertaker but knows he’s better than Batista. This year alone, Orton has pinned Batista twice so tonight, he’ll do it a third time. Bischoff comes out to say it’s on, though non-title because HHH and Edge are already lurking around the next shot.

Women’s Title: Christy Hemme vs. Trish Stratus

Trish isn’t defending because she kicks Christy in the head before the bell. She knocks Lita down as well and attacks the bad knee again, all with the big grin on her face.

We see the full Eugene/Muhammad Hassan/Hulk Hogan segment from last night.

Gladiator trailer.

Here’s Shawn Michaels, limping down the ramp, for a chat. He has only had two loves in his life and those are his family and wrestling. Last night he gave it everything he had but couldn’t get it done. With that being said though, he has a question: would anyone like to see a rematch? The fans seem interested and that’s what Shawn was hoping to hear. He doesn’t know when, where or how it would happen but he’ll do whatever he can to give the fans what they want.

Cue Muhammad Hassan and Daivari to interrupt though and this isn’t likely to go well. Daivari rants a lot as Shawn sits on the top rope and doesn’t quite understand. Hassan switches to English and talks about Hogan returning last night before Shawn came up short in failing to steal the show. Instead Shawn tapped out and left as a disgrace in losing.

That’s enough to get Shawn’s jacket off so Hassan goes into his usual spiel. He accuses the fans of loving losers so Shawn punches him in the face so the fight is on. Daivari distraction lets Hassan get in a chop block though and the beatdown is on, including the camel clutch (instead of something on the leg). Shawn sells the heck out of the beating.

Edge vs. Chris Benoit

Benoit’s arm is badly damaged after last night. Feeling out process to start with Benoit having to keep the bad arm away. The snap suplex and a back elbow put Edge down but he gets in a shot to the bad arm. That’s enough to send Benoit outside for a breather, though he’s fine enough to send Edge into the barricade.

Back in and Benoit makes the mistake of using the bad arm and has to go outside again. Edge manages to snap the arm across the top rope and it’s time for some pulling on said arm. The armbar goes on and Benoit can’t even slam his way out of it. Benoit finally flips his way out and drops Edge but makes the mistake of trying the Swan Dive.

The crash is enough for Edge to get two and he baseball slides Benoit to the floor where he lands on the arm as we take a break. Back with Benoit’s arm in another (albeit different) armbar with the bandage having been pulled off. Edge gives up on that and goes up top, where Benoit chops away with the good arm.

Benoit’s top rope superplex brings him back down in a good looking crash. The Sharpshooter goes on but Edge makes the rope, so Benoit tries the Crossface. Benoit’s arm is WAY too hurt for that to work though and Edge takes him down with a flying armbar. The spear hits corner though and Benoit grabs a rollup for the pin.

Rating: B. They had a good story going here and you know the action is going to be more than enough to carry these two to something great. That’s exactly what happened here with Benoit fighting through the adversity and surviving until the end. Edge losing isn’t going to hurt him that much either as he has the briefcase for a long time and can absorb a loss here or there.

Post match Edge jumps Benoit and sends him into the steps before crushing the bad arm with a chair. JR is VERY furious about this, while Lawler says it’s like the toaster you get when you open a new bank account. All I got was a bank book and a debit card.

Here are Simon Dean and Maven for a chat. They’re not impressed by the Los Angeles fans because all they want to do is eat nachos and drink beer. That’s not healthy and Simon defies anyone to tell him otherwise. Cue the glass shatter and here’s Steve Austin to an eruption. Austin isn’t impressed with all of these products and doesn’t like someone putting down beer drinkers. After insulting their hair, Austin offers Simon a beer, which Simon will drink…if it’s low calorie.

They make a deal: Simon will drink a beer if Austin will drink a Simon Shake. Simon gets the beer but asks if Austin has a glass. After taking a few sips, it’s time to do some pushups to work off the calories. Austin makes him do a lot more before trying the shake, which he says tastes like garbage. Maven says it’s a man’s drink and throws it on Austin. Fans: “YOU F***** UP!” They’re right, as the beatdown is on and beer is consumed. Fine use of Austin on a show like this.

Kane comes up to Orton in the back and laughs at him for not being able to beat Undertaker.

Randy Orton vs. Batista

Non-title. Orton’s headlock works as well as you would expect so he takes Batista into the corner for some right hands. They head outside with Batista being sent into the steps as this isn’t exactly a great showcase of the new World Champion. Back in and Orton grabs a chinlock for a good while before Batista manages to fight up. The corner shoulders have Orton in trouble and his bad shoulder is sent hard into the post. Batista posts it again for good measure and it’s the spinebuster/Batista Bomb to finish Orton. That would be his last match until August.

Rating: D. What was that? Orton gets to beat him up for four minutes and then loses to the double finisher? We wait for an hour and forty five minutes to finally see the new champ and he gets beaten up for most of the match? Orton is on his way to the injured list for a good while and this is the spot they put these two in? I’m not sure I get this one.

HHH comes out to glare at Batista and signal that he wants the title to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. This is before the post-Wrestlemania Raw became a bigger deal and that left us with a pretty energized show. What we got was a show was some good wrestling but little in the way of storylines. Other than HHH vs. Batista continuing, there wasn’t a lot going on here. That’s ok for a show like this though and what we got was certainly entertaining. Good show, and we can start everything that matters next week.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2012/03/19/monday-night-raw-april-4-2005-needs-more-batista/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: March 28, 2005
Location: Fort Worth Convention Center, Fort Worth, Texas
Attendance: 7,300
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the go home show for Wrestlemania and odds are that means a lot of final pushes towards the show. You might see less action than usual as well as WWE won’t be wanting to risk any unnecessary injuries before the biggest night of the year. Batista and HHH are going face to face tonight so we’ll see where they go with their last chance. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Chris Jericho is in the ring for the Highlight Reel and of course there is a ladder in the middle with the briefcase above it. Jericho talks about making history by becoming the first Undisputed Champion and he’ll do it again by winning the first Money in the Bank ladder match. He knows what it feels like to be World Champion and he wants to feel it again. That brings him to his guests: Chris Benoit and Shelton Benjamin.

Jericho says the three of them are kind of friends but he’ll do whatever it takes to win the briefcase. That’s fine with Benoit, but what isn’t fine is Jericho saying he wants to win more than anyone. Shelton interrupts to say that he’s never been World Champion but he’s the only one with gold right now. Cue Christian and Tyson Tomko to say that they’re all lame and that Christian is winning on Sunday. Christian asks what will happen when he gets his first World Title shot. Shelton: “Probably get your a** beat by Batista or HHH.” That was funny.

Christian takes credit for winning two ladder matches at Wrestlemania so here’s Edge to interrupt. He had something to do with those wins but on Sunday, he’ll be winning his third on his own. Edge doesn’t want to hear about Intercontinental Titles or broken necks because he’s done all of that. He’ll do whatever it takes to win the title so Benoit lunges to start the brawl.

Chris Jericho/Shelton Benjamin/Chris Benoit vs. Tyson Tomko/Christian/Edge

Joined in progress with Christian coming in to hammer on Jericho in the corner. Jericho grabs a suplex and brings Shelton in for two off a very fast running shoulder. Benjamin fights out of the corner without much effort but Tomko catches him with a Boss Man Slam. The villains start taking over on Shelton as Lawler explains the details of the MITB contract. That sounds like old hat now, but explaining that someone could cash in on an injured champion at a moment’s notice was a new concept back then.

Shelton powers over to the corner but the referee doesn’t see it and the trouble continues. The chinlock goes on for a bit until Shelton fights up for a double clothesline. The diving tag brings Benoit in for a quick suplex into the Sharpshooter with Christian having to save Edge. Therefore, Benoit German suplexes Christian over and over but Edge crotches Benoit on top. A superplex brings the bloody Benoit (busted open off a headbutt to Tomko) down and we come back from a break with Benoit covered in blood.

He’s also fighting out of a chinlock and getting elbowed in the face for two with Benjamin making the save. Benoit is fine enough to headbutt Christian off the top and hit the Swan Dive, setting up the real hot tag to Jericho. Everything breaks down and Edge spears Tomko by mistake, only to have Shelton Dragon Whip Benoit by mistake. The exploder plants Christian but Tomko hits a heck of a big boot on Shelton. Jericho doesn’t mind and puts Tomko in the Walls for the win.

Rating: C+. This was your standard “get (almost) everyone in the big match in this match for a preview” and the talent in there made it worked. Tomko was a good enough Kane substitute as he was only in there for the power stuff. The good thing about having this much talent is you can throw them into any combination and get a nice match, which is what they had here.

Post match Christian brings in the ladder but here’s Kane to take everyone out.

When Harry Met Sally Wrestlemania trailer.

Eric Bischoff comes in to see Batista and makes him promise a lack of physicality when he and HHH face off tonight. Bischoff can’t afford an injury, so Batista says HHH shouldn’t get injured. Batista promises to not start anything tonight, but he’ll finish anything HHH starts. That’s enough for Eric, but he comes back to ask about Batista’s used car salesman last week. Bischoff brings up Batista’s movie trailer and thinks he could be a Hollywood star (the man knows talent). Batista appreciates that and thinks Bischoff reminds him of someone in Pulp Fiction. That would be the Gimp.

Trish, Christy (in a dress, with Lita), arm wrestling, Christy wins after delays, Christy wins a rematch, Trish nails Lita in the leg. Every one you’ve ever seen of these things.

Classic Steve Austin Moment: the beer truck.

Here’s Randy Orton for a chat. We see a clip of him attacking Stacy Keibler last week, earning Orton a mixed reaction. Perhaps from fans who are glad Stacy is gone? Last week, Stacy hesitated when Orton asked if he could beat Undertaker at Wrestlemania. Orton isn’t waiting because you’re either with him or against him and he wants no distractions. Undertaker is undefeated at Wrestlemania because everyone is beaten before they get into the ring. His future involves a Hall of Fame plaque, which says he beat Undertaker at Wrestlemania. The Undertaker is a legend but Orton is a legend killer.

The lights go out and we see a video counting down the Undertaker’s victims at Wrestlemania over the years. These Wrestlemania videos are always well done and they played a big part in making the Streak feel so important. Back in the arena, the posts catch on fire and Orton is scared to death on the floor. These segments have been good, but I’m not quite buying Orton as a threat after how far he’s fallen in the last few months.

Post break Kane comes up to Orton and sees through his confidence. Kane was lucky to escape two Wrestlemania matches against Undertaker. Orton says he knows what he’s getting into but Kane says Orton needs to prove that he isn’t scared of Undertaker. He has six days to prove it. So there’s a Smackdown segment.

Tag Team Titles: Simon Dean/Maven vs. La Resistance vs. William Regal/Tajiri

Regal and Tajiri are defending and it’s one fall to a finish. Dean and Maven hit a double hiptoss on Tajiri to start so Regal comes in for a double elbow to Maven. La Resistance make their own save so Dean can hit a swinging neckbreaker on Regal. The chinlock doesn’t last long so Grenier gets in a cheap shot from the apron but Regal is right back with a snap bell to back suplex. The hot (though you wouldn’t know it by listening) tag brings in Tajiri for a bunch of kicks, including a big one to pin Maven and retain the titles.

Rating: D. So that didn’t do much. These four were thrown on the show because they had nothing to do at Wrestlemania (save for maybe being in the battle royal), which doesn’t seem to matter despite Regal and Tajiri being champions. I know they’ve been around forever, but would dropping them be the worst thing? Just for now? Other than house show matches, do they really serve an important purpose?

Bischoff tries to convince HHH to stay calm tonight but HHH says Bischoff is forcing him into the ring tonight. HHH will stay calm but if Batista blinks at him in the wrong way, it’s on. These segments feel like filler but what else are they going to do on this show? Promote something else for Wrestlemania?

Smackdown Rebound.

Muhammad Hassan vs. Shawn Michaels

Hassan and Daivari do their usual stuff before the match and it’s a bit more over than usual in Texas. Hassan goes with a knee to the ribs to take Shawn down early and hammers away with right hands. Back up and Shawn is smart enough to stomp on Daivari’s interfering fingers as we take a break.

We come back with Shawn’s back in trouble as Hassan’s offense continues to not be impressive in any way. A back elbow gives Hassan two and the chinlock goes on. There’s a hard whip into the corner to hurt the back even more as they’re managing to kill a Texas crowd in a Shawn Michaels match.

More whips into the corner have Shawn’s back in more trouble and the USA chant proves Hassan’s point all over again. The camel clutch (loose, to be countered version) is broken up with a grab of the ropes and the fans….don’t seem to care. Shawn’s comeback is on with the atomic drop into the forearm into the nipup into the top rope elbow. Sweet Chin Music is loaded up for a very long time but Kurt Angle runs in for the DQ.

Rating: D. This was a great example of what happens when you’re just not that good. Hassan tries but his whole appeal is his gimmick, which isn’t that good either. It’s such a one note promo and idea and while it can work in small doses, we’ve heard the same promo about prejudice time after time. Then he gets in the ring and is so boring that there is no reason to care about anything he does. Even Shawn couldn’t lift him up so who else can make it work?

Post match Angle hits Muhammad by mistake and Shawn fights him off, sending Angle into the crowd as security comes out.

Bischoff tells security to be ready for the Batista vs. HHH brawl.

Wrestlemania Taxi Driver trailer.

Bischoff is in the ring to moderate the big showdown so here are HHH, Flair and Batista. HHH gets to go first and takes his time (shocking) to call Batista ungrateful. After everything HHH has done for him, this is how Batista repays him? No one knew who he was before he met HHH and now Batista is a star.

This goes on and on (shocking) until Batista gets to talk about how he’s going to win on Sunday. He does make sure to throw in some compliments to Flair, because we must praise Flair. Batista promises to take HHH out on Sunday so there goes the table. HHH slaps him in the face (so much for Bischoff’s warning) and security has to be dispatched, leaving Batista standing tall to end the show. That was about as uneventful as you could get, with Batista doing everything he has done before and HHH saying everything he has said before. It changed nothing for Sunday, but the match has been set for so long now that it doesn’t matter.

Overall Rating: D. I wasn’t into this one as they basically shut down everything for some of the same builds toward Sunday, which we’ve covered extensively in the last few weeks. The six man was good but that’s not enough to carry things. This was what happened when the big show is already set and has been for months now. I’m no more interested in watching Wrestlemania than I was before and I felt like I needed to get through this show more than enjoying it and that’s not good with six days to go.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: March 21, 2005
Location: Jefferson Civic Center, Birmingham, Alabama
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Wrestlemania is less than two weeks away and that means we’re in the final stretches of the build. That can be both good and bad as some of the stories can be interesting but at the same time, some of them are running on fumes and not that great. Tonight it’s another Pick Your Poison match with Batista facing Kane. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Shawn Michaels vs. Rob Conway

Sylvain Grenier is here with Conway while Shawn is on his own. An early Grenier distraction doesn’t do much as Shawn sends Conway outside and beats up both French guys. That means a big flip dive to the floor for a bonus as I’m not exactly buying Shawn as being in much danger here.

A cheap shot with the flag pole gives Conway two and we take a break. Back with Shawn fighting out of a chinlock and skinning the cat to avoid a nasty landing on the floor. They slug it out as Conway is getting in far more offense than you would expect here. Shawn makes the real comeback with the usual and drops the top rope elbow. A very hot crowd is pleased as Sweet Chin Music finishes Conway.

Rating: C. That was better than I would have expected with Shawn working hard in a match that doesn’t mean anything for him. That’s how you get a crowd more interested in Wrestlemania as if Shawn can do this against someone like Conway, what could he do against Angle? Rather nice surprise here.

Video on Kurt Angle, who has won everywhere he goes and will do so again at Wrestlemania. The ankle lock gets a lot of extra attention here.

Christy Hemme is ready to fight and has been working on her kicks. She offers to demonstrate to William Regal and Tajiri, who immediately cover their crotches.

Basic Instinct Wrestlemania trailer. That’s a bit of a flashback over the last few weeks.

Molly Holly/Simon Dean/Maven vs. Christy Hemme/William Regal/Tajiri

Oh this is going to hurt. Trish Stratus comes out (with her hair pulled back for a change, making her look like a shorter Michelle McCool) to watch as a bonus. Regal takes Dean down by the arm to start and runs him over with a shoulder for no count. Tajiri comes in and gets dropped by a cheap shot from Maven.

It’s Tajiri getting beaten up as JR tries to keep Lawler from talking about Playboy. Dean goes after Regal but gets kicked in the face by Tajiri, meaning it’s off to the women. A Trish distraction doesn’t do much good as Christy kicks away at Holly but Dean breaks up a sunset flip. Regal knees Dean to the floor and the Molly Go Round misses. The reverse Twist of Fate finishes Molly.

Rating: D+. Well it could have been worse. The whole point of this match was to showcase Christy and have her look good in her outfit while managing to do the one move that she needs to do for the title match. The Tag Team Champions were just kind of there, but that has been the case for years now with those titles.

Classic Steve Austin moment: Vince and the bedpan. Vince’s heart monitor freaking out in time with the beatdown was a great touch.

Here’s an angry HHH for a chat, but first he sets a chair in the ring. He can’t believe how underappreciated he is for everything he does for this business. Do you know what it took to make Batista and Randy Orton into stars? The two of them ruined their own careers with their bad decisions and look where they are now.

Orton is currently volunteering to put his head on the chopping block for the Undertaker at Wrestlemania. He groveled for nothing when he was in Evolution too, but at least he was a star, just like Batista. See, Batista could have made the right decision and gone over to Smackdown, where he could have beaten JBL and John Cena. Now Batista is coming to Wrestlemania and he’s going to lose there too.

Batista went to Wrestlemania once and then won the Royal Rumble so he knows how to win now? The problem for Batista is that he’s coming up against a wrestling god and now the big loss is coming. Last week, Chris Benoit was added to the list of people that Benoit has beaten when Batista picked his poison.

Tonight HHH gets to do the same, as Batista faces Kane in a lumberjack match. HHH gets to pick the lumberjacks of course and anything goes. He’s going to make a decision that needs to be made the animal will be put down. We get some references to the Terry Schiavo case to finally end this after nearly fifteen minutes of HHH’s slow talking about how awesome he is.

Chris Jericho/Shelton Benjamin vs. Edge/Christian

Remember the previous tag match that looked bad? This one doesn’t. Tyson Tomko is here with the Canadian team. Jericho’s headlock on Christian doesn’t get him very far to start so a shoulder gives him two instead. Christian gets knocked outside though and it’s a meeting with Edge and Tomko, allowing Shelton to bust out the big flip dive for the showoff moment.

Edge comes in so Shelton hammers away in the corner until Christian gets in a cheap shot from the floor. Christian’s neckbreaker gets two and we hit the chinlock. Shelton gets up and hits a kick to the head, allowing the tag to Jericho (which looked to have been a bit short). The Lionsault hits Christian but Jericho has to dropkick Tomko off the apron, allowing Christian to hit the reverse DDT.

Back from a break with Shelton coming in off the second hot tag and powerslamming Edge for two. Everything breaks down and the Canadians load up Poetry in Motion, only to have Shelton use Edge as a launchpad to clothesline Christian. Jericho drops both Edge and Christian but dives into Tomko’s boot. The Stinger Splash hits Christian but he’s right back with a belt to the head, setting up Edge’s spear for the pin.

Rating: B-. This Edge and Christian reunion has been a lot of fun so far as they have the natural chemistry but it doesn’t feel like a rehash of the same stuff they’ve done before. They’re different people now and it’s the two of them as singles stars instead of a regular team. You can throw any combination of the awesome upper midcard scene at them and get a good match, just like this one.

Post match Edge and Christian lay out Shelton but Chris Benoit runs in for the save. Tomko brings in the ladder to drop Benoit.

Ric Flair gives the lumberjacks a pep talk, saying that Batista ruined their careers by not going to Smackdown. Tonight can be their own Wrestlemania and they need a new member of Evolution.

A nervous Eric Bischoff comes in to see Batista, telling him that he had nothing to do with the lumberjack match. He’s worried that Batista won’t be happy around here after winning the title at Wrestlemania but Batista says he isn’t worried about it. Batista asks if Bischoff has ever considered running for office. It turns out Bischoff has considered running for mayor of his hometown in Arizona, which is what Batista is talking about. Batista leaves but comes back, saying maybe Bischoff should just be a used car salesman. This didn’t work very well.

Randy Orton has a box for Undertaker and wants Stacy Keibler with him when he goes to the ring.

Smackdown Rebound.

Here are Orton and Keibler for a chat. Orton is ready to add another moment to his legacy at Wrestlemania when he ends the Streak. We see what is in the box: a shirt listing off all of the legends that Orton has killed. He isn’t afraid of Undertaker (take a shot) and will do whatever it takes to win. We get a video on Orton killing various legends before Orton talks about wanting to kill Undertaker’s legend.

That brings him to Stacy, and something he has wanted to do for a long time. They kiss, and it’s an RKO to lay her out. I’m hoping that the big moment was supposed to be their first public kiss because I find it hard to believe that nothing has happened between those two otherwise. I know this probably sounded good on paper, but Orton and Stacy belonged together as much as Stacy did on a wrestling show.

Classic Hulk Hogan Moment: the Mega Powers Explode. Sylvester Stallone will be inducting Hogan for your celebrity appearance.

Tyson Tomko vs. Chris Benoit

Fallout from earlier and Benoit has taped up ribs from the ladder shots. Tomko hits a running knee to knock Benoit to the floor at the bell but Benoit is fine enough to roll some German suplexes. One heck of a Swan Dive (which Benoit might have left short) hits (maybe) Tomko but the banged up ribs means it’s only two. Tomko boots him in the head as Lawler shouts to WORK ON THE RIBS. Another big boot misses and it’s the Crossface to finish Tomko. Always listen to Lawler.

Muhammad Hassan comes up to Shawn (who always looks weird in a suit) to tell him that Shawn knows nothing about adversity. Hassan should be on Wrestlemania because he has not been pinned on Raw. Daivari rants a lot but Shawn cuts them off, challenges Hassan for next week and dubs himself Mr. Wrestlemania.

Wrestlemania trailer: Taxi Driver, featuring a bunch of people doing the famous line and Batista doing his best Jim Ignatowski bit.

Kane vs. Batista

No DQ lumberjack match with HHH on commentary. Kane shoves him into the corner to start but gets powerslammed right back. A Muhammad Hassan distraction lets Chris Masters get in a cheap shot on Batista and it’s time for the slow power brawl. Batista has to kick La Resistance away, allowing Kane to get in a DDT to put him down again. Kane chokes on the ropes but stops to kick Snitsky, allowing Batista to slam him off the top. A big clothesline gives Batista two as the fans are looking at someone who appeared to fall down.

The chokeslam and Batista Bomb are both blocked so Batista shoulders him outside. Snitsky and Viscera go after Kane with the latter posting himself like a moron. The rest of the lumberjacks go after Batista but Edge, Christian and Tomko beat up Kane. Batista gets back up, fights them off, kicks out of the chokeslam and hits his two moves for the pin.

Rating: D+. This was every lumberjack match you can think of and that’s neither good nor bad. What was pretty bad was the match itself, as Kane isn’t the best when he’s up against another monster. He wrestles rather slowly and it makes for some pretty dull matches. Batista winning was never in doubt as he probably won’t be losing a match for several months, let alone this one.

HHH is livid to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. The only thing that matters on this show is Batista vs. HHH as the other matches have been hyped up on either both shows or Smackdown alone. What we got here was good enough, but they’re running out of ways to hype up Batista vs. HHH in a pretty clear ending. Wrestlemania as a whole looks good, though the World Title matches have a limited hype ceiling and we reached that a few weeks ago.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: March 7, 2005
Location: RBC Center, Raleigh, North Carolina
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re less than a month away from Wrestlemania and that means it’s the Batista Show, which is exactly what it should be right now. In addition to that though we have Shawn Michaels vs. Kurt Angle to keep setting up, plus Chris Jericho doing something with a ladder. I’m sure that won’t go anywhere. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of HHH being all upset and Batista not being worried.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Shawn to address Angle. Shawn talks about having a long and brutal match last week and then Angle attacked him. That’s why he showed up on Smackdown last week and gave Angle a beating of his own. We see a clip of Shawn coming to Smackdown and jumping Angle, which got Shawn thinking. Why is Angle having so much rage lately? It’s the kind of rage that comes from doubt, because Angle may be a Gold Medalist, but does that mean he can hang on the biggest stage of them all against Mr. Wrestlemania?

Angle pops up on screen and says it does go back to 1996. Yeah he won in the Olympics but then he kept being asked about turning pro. Shawn wrestled Bret Hart for over an hour and reporters talked to him about that instead of his gold medal. Angle wants Shawn to watch Smackdown as Angle is going to take four weeks to do what Shawn took sixteen years to do. Shawn doesn’t look sure to wrap things up. This was a very solid promo exchange as they gave a good story to a match that didn’t need one, which is always appreciated.

HHH vs. Rosey

Non-title as Rosey wants revenge for Hurricane from last week. A very early Pedigree attempt is blocked with Rosey hitting a running splash in the corner instead. Rosey misses a middle rope moonsault (which looked better than you might have expected) so HHH hammers away. HHH whips him into the steps and takes it back inside for the spinebuster. The Pedigree finishes things quick.

Post match HHH gets in a sledgehammer shot to further make his point, whatever that was supposed to be.

Jerry Lawler got Christy Hemme to sign his Playboy today.

Video on the Playboy shoot.

Ric Flair is worried about facing Batista tonight but HHH talks him into it. Promising to be out there with the sledgehammer makes Flair feel better too.

Chris Jericho, Edge, Shelton Benjamin, Christian and Chris Benoit are in Eric Bischoff’s office. Bischoff explains the concept of the big ladder match but Edge doesn’t want any part of it. The tease of getting a chance to be World Champion brings him back though, with Bischoff first dropping the term Money In The Bank. Tonight, the six participants will be facing off, with Christian getting to face the sixth participant next.

Kane vs. Christian

Christian tries to hammer away in the corner to start but gets shoved down with ease. Kane gets in his choking in the corner but a Tomko cheap shot gives Christian a break. Like any normal sized person against a monster, Christian tries the sleeper and has some more success than usual. Kane swings it around into a side slam and there’s a powerslam for a bonus. The big boot looks to set up the top rope clothesline but Kane has to kick Tomko down first. Not that it matters as Christian charges into the chokeslam for the pin a few seconds later.

Rating: D+. It was so nice to see a match like this that didn’t involve hearing 184 instances of commentary talking about building momentum. Instead they talked about the carnage coming in the ladder match and how big of a force Kane could be. It was a specific discussion instead of the generic terms that they use most of the time in the build to these things.

Post match Tomko hits a big boot on Kane before bailing with Christian.

Stacy Keibler helps Randy Orton get dressed so he can make his official challenge for Wrestlemania.

Lawler enjoys some Subway.

Chris Jericho vs. Edge

Edge has a banged up arm coming in after last week’s street fight. We start with the YOU SCREWED MATT chants as the feeling out process gets us going. Now it’s a YOU SCREWED LITA chant as Jericho starts in on a hammerlock. Some knees and a dropkick to the arm set up an attempted cross armbreaker as Edge is having some issues to start.

The running enziguri puts Edge down again and it’s the springboard dropkick to put him on the floor. A plancha to the floor takes Edge down and takes us to a break. Back with Jericho kicking at the ribs and going up top, only to have Edge catch him with a top rope superplex. The chinlock with a bodyscissors goes on but Jericho fights up, only to get kneed right back down.

A clothesline works a bit better for a comeback and Jericho gets two off a DDT. The running bulldog sets up the missed Lionsault and Edge gets two off a big boot. Jericho grabs the legs for the Walls attempt but Edge kicks him into the referee. Edge gets a boot up in the corner (the boot works well for him) but the missed spear sends Edge outside. Since there is a ladder out there with him, Edge brings it in, only to get taken down for a Lionsault to the back. There’s no referee though so Edge hits Jericho low with the ladder. The Edgecution gives Edge the pin.

Rating: C+. I was expecting a bit more given the time they had, but Edge cheating to win fits him very well at the moment. He’s obsessed with winning the title and will do anything he can to get a step closer to being champion. The match was good enough due to the talent involved, but these two can do better.

Bischoff has a new idea: Batista picks HHH’s opponent and the week after that, HHH picks Batista’s opponent. Coach declares this to be genius, with Bischoff dubbing the idea Pick Your Poison.

Hulk Hogan Hall of Fame video. We covered that last week.

Here’s Orton for his Wrestlemania challenge. When he was five years old, he sat in front of the TV and watched his dad wrestle, which was pretty cool. This year, his dad is going into the Hall of Fame and Orton is so proud of him. Wrestling is about making an impact and that is what he’s going to do right now by challenging the Undertaker for Wrestlemania. Undertaker is a legend and the Legend Killer is putting an end to the Streak.

This brings out Bischoff, who thinks he drove Orton to the challenge. He’s looking forward to Raw winning the interbranded matches at Wrestlemania because the stock options will be great. Orton asks Bischoff about running WCW and his success against Raw. Bischoff agrees and Orton thinks that makes him a legend. Bischoff: “That’s right Randy it…..does.” The RKO drops Bischoff. Orton vs. Undertaker sounds good on paper, but it would have had more of an impact had Orton not been destroyed over the last few months.

Wrestlemania rundown.

Chris Benoit vs. Shelton Benjamin

Non-title. They go straight to the chops to start with Benjamin getting sent outside for the big dive, which sends Benoit crashing into the ladder, bending it in the process (that’s a hard one to watch). Back in and the top rope clothesline gets two but Benoit is right back up with the rolling German suplexes. The Swan Dive misses though and Shelton rolls him up for one. The Dragon Whip misses and Benoit grabs the Crossface, eventually rolling into the middle to make Benjamin tap.

Rating: C. That was intense but rather short as they didn’t even get five minutes. These two could have an instant classic with more time but given that Edge vs. Jericho got the time earlier, it’s not like the time was given to something worthless. Shelton tapping isn’t the best idea, though it doesn’t mean much given the circumstances.

Wrestlemania trailer, this time with Undertaker as Dirty Harry. That doesn’t fit well during the Deadman phase. Neither is Undertaker shooting the guy with a shotgun.

We look at HHH hitting Rosey with the hammer again.

Bischoff is banged up when Muhammad Hassan and Daivari come in. Hassan should have been in Money in the Bank and claims discrimination. Bischoff based the participants on their past success at Wrestlemania and that doesn’t apply to Hassan. Revenge is promised.

Smackdown Rebound.

William Regal and Tajiri are impressed by Christy’s Playboy but Trish isn’t quite so keen.

Here’s Christy for a chat. Lawler: “I go from 0 to horny in about 3.5 seconds when I hear her music.” Even JR sidesteps that one and I think we’re all better off for that. She wants Trish out here right now so here’s the champ. Trish tells her to make this quick but thinks she knows what is going on: Christy wants her out here for the announcement that Playboy goes on sale this Friday. Maybe Christy can even autograph it “s***”, like Trish wrote on her last week.

Actually Christy wants a title shot at Wrestlemania. Trish laughs and then promises to end Christy’s career. Christy wants the match so Trish says it’s on. It turns out that Christy has been receiving training from Lita, who comes out to a reaction that almost makes you forget that it’s Christy Hemme getting a Wrestlemania title shot. Granted it’s not like there is anyone else to challenge though. Christy takes advantage of the Lita staredown and hits a reverse Twist of Fate, with the camera catching most of it.

Bischoff won’t let HHH go to ringside for the main event, at least not with the sledgehammer. HHH and Flair complain but Bischoff shows some backbone and makes HHH drop the hammer.

Next week: HHH vs. Chris Benoit.

Ric Flair vs. Batista

HHH is here with Flair. The fans aren’t entirely behind Batista as this is certainly Flair Country. Batista shoves him down with ease to start so Flair goes at him again and gets shoved down a second time. A backdrop sends Flair flying and Batista hammers away in the corner.

HHH offers a distraction and Flair gets in the classic chop block. Flair chokes away with the boot before going back to the knee. The greatest hits only work for so long though as Batista gets up and glares at Flair. The big slam off the top checks off another box and there’s the spinebuster. HHH tries to run in and gets tossed out, setting up the Batista Bomb for the pin.

Rating: C. This was a paint by numbers match and that’s the right call. Flair (or anyone for that matter) isn’t going to be seen as a threat to Batista at the moment but beating him fits the story. Batista gets another win and gets to look dominant as well as smart. That’s a good use of seven minutes, even if the match was never in doubt.

Post match HHH comes back in with a spar sledgehammer but Batista takes it away. The hammer is broken over Batista’s knee, sending HHH into a panic to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. There was a lot more to this show than the wrestling and that worked fairly well. They set up a few matches for Wrestlemania, one of which will actually be good, and kept going with more between HHH vs. Batista. The Pick Your Poison deal lets them have two weeks of storyline stuff, which is better than cramming it into one week. Stuff was done on this show, though it does make it clear how much more Raw has to offer than Smackdown for Wrestlemania.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Summerslam 2013
Date: August 18, 2013
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 17,739
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s a double main event tonight with a pair of smaller guys vs. big powerhouses with CM Punk vs. Brock Lesnar and Daniel Bryan challenging John Cena for the World Title. This is remembered as one of the best shows in a very long time for WWE and it should be interesting to see how well it holds up. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: United States Title: Dean Ambrose vs. Rob Van Dam

Ambrose is defending and there’s no Shield with him to start. Some standing switches go nowhere and Ambrose continues to look moderately displeased by the whole thing at worst. Rob is right back up with a spinning kick to the chest, meaning he can hit those finger pokes. You don’t do that to Ambrose, who chops away in the corner and stops a charging Rob with a kick to the face.

The neck crank goes on, followed by a running dropkick against the ropes to keep Rob in trouble. It’s back to the chinlock with the microphones picking up the spot calling. Rob is right back up with a kick to the face and the split legged moonsault out of the corner for two. A kick to the head breaks up the original Dirty Deeds (headlock driver) but here are Roman Reigns and Seth Rollins. That brings out Mark Henry and Big Show and we take a break. Back with everyone standing at ringside and Dean dropping an elbow for two. The ECW chants bring Rob back to life but Dean sends him outside.

That means a staredown between the four on the floor with Rob managing a suplex on Dean. The spinning kick to the back on the apron has Dean in even more trouble and it’s a top rope cannonball for two back inside. Dean is right back with a spinebuster for two of his own but misses his top rope elbow. Rob has to go after Rollins instead of trying the Five Star so he kicks Dean down again. The Five Star connects but Roman Reigns comes in with a spear for the DQ at 13:40.

Rating: B-. This worked rather well and is one of Van Dam’s last good matches either in WWE or anywhere for that matter. He looked like his old self here and made Ambrose look good, even when he got the DQ win. This was still before Shield had reached their peak and they were far better as a team anyway. It got the crowd going and happened to be a good match in the process. Not bad for the Kickoff.

Here’s the Miz as your host for the evening. His task at the moment: tell us about the main events we already know. How TNA of him. We’re about to hear our first match but Fandango and Summer Rae cut him off with some dancing. Miz: “Really? Really? WELCOME TO SUMMERSLAM!”

The opening video focuses on Los Angeles and how big things happen here. Like Summerslam. That’s a nice motif and it moves into the double main event, which is indeed sounding great. Future note: the music during this video would become Akira Tozawa’s theme (not sure if that’s a Network edit or not).

Dig that pyro. Seriously with all the money they have, we can only get it at Wrestlemania and the Saudi shows?

Jojo from Total Divas sings the National Anthem. This was a plot point on Total Divas because that she needed to stretch for plot points.

Kane vs. Bray Wyatt

This is a Ring of Fire match, meaning an Inferno match with pins and submissions only. It’s also Bray’s in-ring debut, which is almost weird to imagine. Harper and Rowan are in Wyatt’s corner, as tends to be the case. The bell rings and the flames come up, going all of six inches high. Kane slugs away to start and the flames do go higher as someone lands on the mat.

Harper and Rowan get closer to the ring and the flames go WAY up to make things look a lot better. Kane hits a suplex to pop the flames again and avoids a big boot, sending Bray close to the fire. Bray’s running splash in the corner connects and he hammers away as the fans aren’t exactly thrilled so far. Back up and Kane sends him into the corner and the side slam makes the flames go up again. The chokeslam is broken up and Harper tries to throw in a kendo stick but the flames cut it off.

Cue the fireman to put the stick out, allowing Kane to hit the chokeslam. Rowan grabs the fire extinguisher to try and put out the flames but they come right back up as Kane hits another chokeslam. For some reason there’s no cover so Kane hits a third chokeslam, meaning it’s Tombstone time. Hold on again though as Harper and Rowan put a blanket over the flames and get in for the beatdown. The fans want Undertaker but settle for Sister Abigail to finish Kane at 7:49.

Rating: F. Well that was dumb. You have Wyatt getting destroyed until the goons saved him, the flames not lasting seven minutes before someone figured a way around them, and the match being dreadful until the ending. Pick two of them and you can figure out what was wrong with this one. It was a good idea on paper but the execution was a nightmare, which sums up Wyatt’s whole career.

Post match Wyatt puts on his hat and sits in the rocking chair as Harper and Rowan put Kane’s head on the steps. They pick up the other steps and crush his head for the big knockout, which looked better than most of the match. Harper and Rowan carry Kane out.

The Kickoff Show panel talks about the Wyatt Family.

On the Kickoff Show, Paul Heyman talked about how the real story of David vs. Goliath is that Goliath took the best shot and then destroyed David. Heyman has gotten both sides to agree that tonight can be No DQ so Lesnar can finish Punk for good.

Damien Sandow vs. Cody Rhodes

Sandow is Mr. Money in the Bank and cost Cody the briefcase to break up their team. Before the match, Sandow talks about how there have been great pairings throughout literary history, with each pair having a lackey. Tonight, Sandow proves that he was the leader by sending Cody back to the land of clowns. Cody starts fast and hammers away before getting two off a backdrop. Sandow is right back with a suplex and a double arm crank as this is already feeling like a TV match.

An early Cross Rhodes attempt is blocked and Sandow hits the Russian legsweep into the wind-up elbow for two. Something like Edge’s Edgecation goes on but Cody kicks away without much effort. Cody catches him on top with a MuscleBuster of all things and that gets the fans into things for a change. A missile dropkick gives Cody two more and the Disaster Kick knocks Sandow silly for another two. Cody misses a charge into the post to give Sandow two but Cody snaps off Cross Rhodes for the pin at 6:39.

Rating: D. This was a case where Cody should have won the briefcase and moved up to the World Title scene but instead they went with Sandow and the whole thing flopped because no one bought him in that spot. Maybe they were planning on having Cody take the briefcase from him, but the damage was already done. It’s a case of putting too much thought into things as WWE screwed up something else.

We recap Christian vs. Alberto Del Rio for the Smackdown World Title. Alberto had put Christian on the shelf late last year and now Christian is the challenger of the month. Actually saying this is recapping Christian vs. Alberto is a little misleading as Alberto is neither seen nor mentioned in the video. I know he’s not interesting but come on now.

Smackdown World Title: Christian vs. Alberto Del Rio

Alberto is defending. They circle each other a few times until a loud kick to the leg has Christian in trouble. A headlock doesn’t do much for the champ as Christian comes back up with a right hand and a toss over the ropes. Back in and Christian gets caught on top for the running enziguri into the running kicks to the chest. It’s time to go to the arm, as tends to be Del Rio’s style.

The armbar doesn’t last long so Del Rio throws him into the air for the big crash to the mat. A top rope double stomp to the arm gets two but Del Rio misses a charge and goes crashing out to the floor. That lets Christian hit a dive off the top and they’re both down. Back in and Del Rio goes right back to the arm, because it’s a plan that works well. He deviates from said plan by going up and diving into raised boots though, allowing Christian to hammer away in the corner.

The high crossbody gets two on the champ but the Killswitch is countered into a Backstabber. Another running enziguri in the corner rocks Christian for two more but he’s fine enough to hit a middle rope elbow to the jaw. A super hurricanrana gives Christian another two and it’s time for the spear.

Since the idea of selling Christian’s spear makes anyone cringe, Del Rio dropkicks him in the face for two instead. There’s a low superkick for another two, with the fans dubbing this awesome. Eh…..it’s close but I don’t know about that. Christian hits the spear out of nowhere but the arm is banged up, allowing Del Rio to slap on the armbreaker for the tap at 12:29.

Rating: B. I can’t go all the way to awesome but this was a rather fun match with Christian throwing everything he had. That being said, I wasn’t buying a lot of the near falls as Christian never hit the Killswitch and Del Rio never won with anything but the armbreaker. Christian’s career was more or less done at this point, as he would be put out of action again in a few months and have his last comeback with his final match in March.

Post match Del Rio says he’ll be the hero Los Angeles needs. Someone get this man a big bus!

Video on Summerslam Axxess earlier in the day, complete with a women’s tag match including Marina Menunos.

Maria is here and talks about the Bella Twins freaking out about Maria saying Natalya did well on Total Divas. Cue Fandango and Summer Rae to dance but Maria and Miz do just the same, leaving Fandango and Summer looking annoyed.

Natalya vs. Brie Bella

Cameron, Naomi, Eva Marie and Nikki Bella are here because this is the Total Divas match of the night. It’s weird seeing Natalya in regular gear instead of the leather she’s worn for years now. You can tell this is serious as they exchanged SLAPS on Raw. They fight over failed hiptoss attempts to start and it’s time for another slapoff. Brie has to bail to the floor to avoid the Sharpshooter so Nikki and Eva get in some cheating to take Natalya to the floor. The fans chant for JBL instead of this mess before quickly shifting over to the other announcers. Or maybe it’s an old Jerry Graham fan club.

Brie grabs the chinlock as the fans want tables. Egads the idea of the Total Divas crew trying to do something that complicated. The chinlock goes on again because that’s their best idea at the moment. Natalya fights out without much trouble but the Sharpshooter is countered with a rollup into the corner. The other four get in a fight on the floor and it’s a THIRD CHINLOCK in less than five minutes. Natalya breaks it up and, with the fans saying they want Ryder, slaps on the Sharpshooter for the win at 5:21.

Rating: D-. Any match that involves three chinlocks in less than five minutes is pretty self explanatory. There was no story here other than they were arguing about a reality show and that’s enough to get us here. The wrestling was pretty awful with the talented Natalya not being good enough to carry Brie. At least it was short, but this really had no business being on Summerslam.

Ryback, currently a bully, yells at catering about the soup being cold. It’s supposed to be, which Ryback knew of course. The soup goes down the chef’s shirt and then over his head. Ryback: “Feed me moron.” Make sure you catch his podcast so he can tell you how he came up with that entire idea and how it would have been a classic if WWE supported him.

We recap CM Punk vs. Brock Lesnar. Punk was about to win Money in the Bank but Paul Heyman turned on him because Punk was nothing without him. Heyman brought Lesnar back in to destroy Punk, who had been Heyman’s friend and client for a long time. It’s a pretty easy tagline: The Best vs. The Beast. This was better than the UFC version: Former UFC Heavyweight Champion vs. The Miserable Failure.

CM Punk vs. Brock Lesnar

No DQ. I know I say this a lot, but a fired up Lesnar is a terrifying human being. Punk shrugs off the shoulders in the corner to start so Lesnar just does them again. The CM PUNK chants begin and you can feel the energy in this one. A heck of a beal across the ring rocks Punk and it’s time for some choking in the corner. Punk manages a kick to the head and Lesnar is rocked, followed by some running knees to put him outside.

The suicide dive connects as I can’t help but look for the baseball sized growth on his back (it’s just hard not to). Punk tries the steps but Brock knocks them right back into him without much effort. Lesnar posts himself though and Punk scores with a top rope dive to stagger him again. The clothesline off the announcers’ table connects as well but Punk makes the mistake of going after Heyman. Lesnar LAUNCHES him over the table and Cole is declaring this one over already.

Back in and Punk starts kicking at the leg so Lesnar hits him in the face (don’t make it complicated). The bearhug stays on the ribs as you can’t fault Lesnar’s plan. Punk’s escape plan: hit Lesnar in the face. See? He’s learning too. Lesnar goes right back to the ribs and the slow pace continues. Another bearhug goes on and gets broken up by more shots to the face. Punk kicks him in the ribs and goes up, only to dive into a World’s Strongest Slam (giving us a great OH DANG IT face).

Some backbreakers get two as Punk’s ribs are being destroyed and we hit the chinlock. Punk bites the ear to escape and starts striking away, setting up a top rope knee to the face to FINALLY put Lesnar down. Some running knees in the corner connect and a kick to the head sets up the Macho Elbow (almost a splash) for a hot two. The GTS and F5 are both countered so Punk kicks him in the head again.

Another GTS attempt is countered into the Kimura but that’s reversed into a triangle choke. You just don’t do that to a power guy like Lesnar though, as he turns it over into a powerbomb….which doesn’t break anything. Lesnar powers up again though, this time into a heck of a running powerbomb for the real break. The delayed cover gets two and a ticked off Lesnar rolls some suplexes for two more.

Lesnar takes his sweet time going outside so Punk can get up top for a dive. That’s blocked by a raised chair, but Punk still drives it into Lesnar at the same time. That means Punk can beat the heck out of Lesnar with the chair and it’s Punk getting fired up this time. Back in and Punk hits him low, meaning it’s time to go up top for the Macho Elbow with the chair. Lesnar can’t get up (that’s a rare shot) so Punk hits him again, leaving Heyman to take the chair.

Brock is back up and grabs the F5 but Punk grabs Heyman’s tie for the block. Punk slips out and hits the GTS with Heyman having to make a save. The chase is on and Punk runs into the F5, which is countered into a DDT for two. The Anaconda Vice goes on, but since Lesnar’s legs aren’t kicking you know it’s not a finish. Heyman tries to come in with a chair….but Punk steps onto it. A right hand drops Heyman and Punk puts him in the Vice (like an idiot). Lesnar gets in the chair shot to Punk and the F5 onto the chair is good for the pin at 25:17.

Rating: A. Oh I loved this one all over again. The one part holding it back was Heyman getting involved once too often and Punk getting stupid by putting him in the Vice (he’s way too smart to get that caught up no matter what). Other than that, this was an incredible display of the underdog (who happens to be a multiple time World Champion) going after the unbeatable monster and getting dangerously close to stopping him. I was getting into the near falls here and that says a lot given that I knew how it was ending. Awesome stuff and the blueprint for how to have a smaller guy fight Lesnar.

Punk gets the big hero’s sendoff in what would be his last great match.

A fan took a Mark Henry splash for Summerslam tickets. I’d do it too. The fan and his friends will be ringside for the next match.

Dolph Ziggler/Kaitlyn vs. Big E. Langston/AJ Lee

Langston and Lee turned on Ziggler so he got Kaitlyn, who lost the Divas Title to AJ, on his side for this. It’s so strange seeing Big E. as his old self. The guys start and Big E. goes straight to an abdominal stretch to take over. It’s already off to the women with AJ kicking Kaitlyn in the face for two. The sleeper on Kaitlyn’s back keeps things slow and we look at the fans eating Doritos (sponsor).

Kaitlyn fights up and brings Ziggler back in for the dropkick and rapid fire elbow drops to Big E. Since they’re just elbows, Big E. is right back up with an over the shoulder backbreaker for two with Kaitlyn making the save. A hard running shoulder in the corner only hits post, leaving Kaitlyn to hit a heck of a spear to AJ on the floor (AJ always sold that perfectly). Big E. is fine enough to try the Big Ending but Ziggler reverses into the Zig Zag for the pin at 6:45.

Rating: D+. This was nothing but a way to let the crowd calm down a bit after the instant classic and there’s nothing wrong with being in that spot. Kaitlyn’s spear looked awesome and it was always cool to see Big E. throwing humans around like they were toys. The Ziggler push was already dying around this time but somehow he would still be kicking around in big spots six years later. WWE is funny/stupid in that way.

Fandango interrupts Miz one more time so Miz lays him out. Cole: “It’s Fan-DOWN-Go.” No Cole, it isn’t.

The Kickoff Panel does what Kickoff Panels do. In this case that means picking Daniel Bryan to beat John Cena for the title.

We recap Cena vs. Bryan. Cena was given the chance to pick his challenger for this show and selected Bryan, who had worked his way up the card like few others in recent years. Management hated the idea because Bryan wasn’t good enough and tried to give Bryan a corporate makeover. Bryan refused to cut his beard though because he was going to be himself. HHH, who has seemed to favor Bryan, is guest referee. Bryan and Cena have played up the sports entertainment vs. wrestling deal, which is exactly what this match should be about.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Daniel Bryan

Bryan is challenging with HHH as guest referee. Cena is also sporting a massive growth on his elbow, which was leaving him desperately in need of surgery because it’s the size of a baseball. Bryan isn’t getting the superstar pops yet but he’s cheered more than Cena. We get the Big Match Intros and I had forgotten about Bryan’s THE BEARD IS HERE shirt. Cena grabs a headlock to start as they have a ton of time here.

Bryan rolls out with no trouble and it’s an early standoff. Back up and Cena tries a test of strength, which is blocked by a bridge. The YES Lock attempt sends Cena bailing to the floor and he tells the doctor that his arm is fine. Back in and Bryan takes him down into the surfboard knee stomp as Cena is in way over his head with the wrestling. Therefore, he runs Bryan over for a knock to the floor because power is his best bet. Cena follows him outside but gets sent into the steps, only to manage a suplex off the steps to put Bryan down again.

Back in and Cena whips him hard into the corner as Bryan has no answer for the power game just yet. A Batista Bomb gives Cena two and the chinlock goes on. Bryan fights up and forearms away, setting up some kicks in the corner to put Cena on defense again. The running clothesline drops Cena and you can feel the fans’ energy picking up. The YES Kicks connect but, as usual, the big one misses and Cena fires off the shoulders.

Cena takes too long with the Shuffle though and gets kicked in the head, only to come back with the ProtoBomb. Now the Shuffle connects but the AA doesn’t work just yet. Instead Bryan hits a missile dropkick for two as they’re going back and forth very well here. Over ten minutes in, Bryan finally goes after the BIG FREAKING BULGE on his arm to take over. Cena tries the STF but Bryan kicks away and grabs one of his own. The rope is grabbed so Bryan hits a pair of German suplexes for a pair of twos.

Now it’s off to the YES Lock but Cena slips out, earning himself a guillotine choke instead. That’s countered with a backdrop into the corner (cool) and they’re both down for a second. Cena grabs the AA out of nowhere for two and they’re down a bit longer. With nothing working, Cena goes up but Bryan catches him with the running forearms to stagger him. Bryan superplexes him down but hangs on to stay up top for a cool visual.

The Swan Dive connects for two so Cena runs him over with the clothesline for two of his own. Cole mentions that HHH is referee, marking the most significant HHH portion of the match over twenty minutes in. Cena’s super AA is blocked by elbows to the head but Cena blocks the super hurricanrana. That means jumping down and dropping Bryan on top of his head in a botch I had forgotten about so the cringing is strong. The STF goes on with Bryan rolling over to take off some of the pressure.

Bryan manages to reverse into the YES Lock until Cena makes the rope. The running corner dropkicks have Cena in more trouble so he comes out of the corner with the hard clothesline to turn Bryan inside out. The slugout it on until they both hit flying shoulders for another double knockdown. Bryan wins the next slugout but the moonsault out of the corner is caught on Cena’s shoulders. That’s countered into a DDT and they’re both down again. Bryan tries a high crossbody but gets caught in the AA. It’s reversed again and Bryan kicks him in the head, setting up the debuting running knee for the pin and the title at 26:54.

Rating: A+. I go back and forth on which of the two big matches I like more and this time around I liked the story that much more. Bryan debuting the running knee to win is still one of my favorite things in a long time as it came out of nowhere and makes the move look devastating right off the bat. They had a great battle of styles here with both guys sticking with their respective specialties until Bryan broke down the machine through heart and determination, plus some awesome strikes. I had a great time with this one and it was one of the best matches I’ve seen in a good while.

Raw World Title: Randy Orton vs. Daniel Bryan

Bryan is defending as well as out so Orton wins the title in eight seconds. There’s your major story over the next eight months and yes I still believe that Bryan winning the title at Wrestlemania was the plan all along (details to be determined).

Overall Rating: A-. This is one of those shows where the good is excellent and the rest just exists. That being said, with the two awesome main events and a rather good Del Rio vs. Christian match, you have a seven match card (leaving out the cash-in match) with three of them receiving some rather high praise. That’s about as good as you can get and it’s one of the better shows in recent memory. Yeah the other four matches range from bad to rather bad, but their times combined are about equal to the main event. Excellent show and worth your time (as in less than three hours) to see.

Ratings Comparison

Rob Van Dam vs. Dean Ambrose

Original: B-
2014 Redo: B-
2017 Redo: D+

2019 Redo: B-

Bray Wyatt vs. Kane

Original: D+

2014 Redo: D

2017 Redo: F+

2019 Redo: F

Damien Sandow vs. Cody Rhodes

Original: C

2014 Redo: D+

2017 Redo: C+

2019 Redo: D

Alberto Del Rio vs. Christian

Original: B+

2014 Redo: B

2017 Redo: B

2019 Redo: B

Brie Bella vs. Natalya

Original: F

2014 Redo: D-

2017 Redo: D-

2019 Redo: D-

Brock Lesnar vs. CM Punk

Original: A+

2014 Redo: A+

2017 Redo: A+

2019 Redo: A

Big E. Langston/AJ Lee vs. Dolph Ziggler/AJ Lee

Original: C-

2014 Redo: D+

2017 Redo: D+

2019 Redo: D+

Daniel Bryan vs. John Cena

Original: A+

2014 Redo: A+

2017 Redo: A+

2019 Redo: A+

Randy Orton vs. Daniel Bryan

Original: N/A

2014 Redo: N/A

2017 Redo: N/A

2019 Redo: N/A

Overall Rating

Original: A-

2014 Redo: A

2017 Redo: A-

2019 Redo: A-

Was I in a really bad mood when I watched the Kickoff Show in 2017? And I’m all over the place with Cody vs. Sandow. Other than that, it’s pretty much the definitive set of ratings here.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Summerslam 2013
Date: August 18, 2013
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 14,166
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield

This is the show that was voted on for the annual redo and I can’t say I’m complaining. The show was instantly revered and it held up when I watched it the second time. We’ve got a double main event with Daniel Bryan challenging John Cena for the World Title and CM Punk vs. Brock Lesnar in the Best vs. the Beast. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: US Title: Dean Ambrose vs. Rob Van Dam

Dean is defending and we still have the full Shield entrance (no Reigns/Rollins here) through the crowd, which is still just cool. A shoulder drops Rob to start and Dean grabs a hammerlock as it’s a slow pace early on. Rob clotheslines him into a headlock but charges into a boot to the face for two. A neckbreaker gives Dean the same and we hit the neck crank as we’re somehow four minutes into this.

Ambrose gets in a running dropkick and grabs a quickly broken chinlock. Rob kicks him down to set up the Five Star but Rollins and Reigns come through the crowd, rendering him completely incapable of jumping. Big Show and Mark Henry show up as well though, putting us all even as we as we take a break.

Back with Dean grabbing a chinlock and sending Rob outside. That means a staredown on the floor as Henry and Show earn those paychecks and DVD royalties. Rob drops Dean on the barricade and hits the spinning kick to the back. A rollup gives Rob two back inside but he walks into a good looking spinebuster for two. Dean misses a top rope elbow but Rob has to go after Rollins instead of Five Starring. Rolling Thunder crushes Dean and it’s Five Star time, only to have Reigns spear Rob down for the DQ at 13:38.

Rating: D+. This was a pretty sad way to start the show as you would expect a lot more from these two. Ambrose was a very natural arrogant heel but Rob was just going through the motions. It didn’t help that the big plot point, Show and Henry, did NOTHING here and Reigns interfered anyway. It’s never a good sign when you can completely take people out of a match and it changes nothing but that was the case here. Really disappointing outing.

And now on to the mai…..IT’S LESS THAN THREE HOURS!!! Oh sweet goodness happy days are here again!

Here’s the Miz, your host for the evening and still a face here, to open things up. He explains the two main events, just in case people stumbled in here expecting a free car wash. Fandango and Summer Rae (dang) cut him off and dance around him. Miz: “Really? Really?” Anyway, welcome to Summerslam.

The opening video talks about how the stars are out tonight and has a bit of a grainy look to it for a unique visual. As you might expect, the two main events receive most of the attention. Of note: the instrumental background music would become Akira Tozawa’s theme.

JoJo sings the National Anthem, which was a plot point on Total Divas because Total Divas is creatively bankrupt.

Kane vs. Bray Wyatt

This is a Ring of Fire match, meaning the ring is surrounded by fire like an inferno match but you win by regular means. It’s also Wyatt’s in-ring debut, which is kind of gobsmacking. Kane unloads on him in the corner to start as the arena is much darker than usual to show off the flames. A clothesline drops Wyatt and the flames go over the top rope.

Kane gets in a suplex for the same result as Luke Harper and Erick Rowan are panicking on the floor. The fact that they’re there more or less guarantees they find a way to interfere, thereby making the gimmick worthless. Wyatt hits a running splash in the corner and hammers away on the mat. A big boot to the…..arm maybe drops Wyatt and there’s the sidewalk slam for no cover.

Harper tries to grab a kendo stick but it gets caught on fire, sending an overzealous fireman to put it out. Rowan takes his extinguisher but can’t get rid of the flames. The chokeslam plants Wyatt for no cover as Kane would rather do it again, likely so Harper and Rowan can figure out a way inside. They find a fireproof….something and get inside for the big beatdown. Rowan splashes Kane and Sister Abigail gives Bray the pin at 7:48.

Rating: F+. This was WAY worse than I remember as it was literally just killing time until the ending. The ending was as telegraphed as it could have been and there was never any drama. Instead of actually having a match, this was a mental exercise for the Family and that’s REALLY not how you want to debut someone with the kind of potential Wyatt has.

Post match the Wyatts crush Kane with the steps and carry him off to film See No Evil 2.

The Kickoff Show panel wastes a minute of our time.

We see a Paul Heyman promo on the Kickoff Show, talking about how in reality, David would have thrown a stone at Goliath and then taken the beating of a lifetime. As a bonus, tonight’s match is No DQ.

Damien Sandow vs. Cody Rhodes

They used to be partners until Sandow won the Money in the Bank briefcase (it’s still the brown one which looks like a Hershey bar) in the surprise for the sake of swerving the fans who KNEW Cody was going to win (which he was). Before the match, Sandow says he was the leader of the Rhodes Scholars and tonight, he’s sending Cody back to the Rhodes Family so they can be dumb and dumber. Cole’s big plug for the entrances: watch the JBL and Cole Show to find out why Cody shaved his mustache!

They start fast with Sandow shoving him into the corner but getting backdropped. The gordbuster gives Cody two but a legsweep sends him outside. Back in and some knees to the back set up a bow and arrow hold. Sandow has to fight out of an early Cross Rhodes attempt and drops the Wind Up Elbow for two. I know Sandow has the charisma but dang it’s not working in the ring.

Sandow puts on a standing leglock for a few moment before switching to just rubbing Cody’s face in the mat. Cody catches him on the top though and it’s something like a Muscle Buster for two. A springboard missile dropkick gets two on Sandow but he comes right back with a running flip neckbreaker for the same. Cody nails the Disaster Kick for the near fall, followed by Cross Rhodes for the pin at 6:39.

Rating: C+. They were working hard out there and had a good match but it’s very clear that Sandow is in WAY over his head with the briefcase. I don’t think anyone really bought him as a main eventer at this point and his pretty worthless TNA run doesn’t exactly change the theory that it was the stunt double gimmick that was so good and not him.

Video on Christian, who is back for one more run at the World Title.

Smackdown World Title: Alberto Del Rio vs. Christian

Christian is challenging. Del Rio has Lillian Garcia introduce him in Spanish, which isn’t quite a heel move in a major Hispanic market. Alberto grabs a headlock but gets slapped for his efforts, followed by the back of the neck snap across the top rope. That’s fine with him though as he puts Christian on the top for a heck of a running enziguri to put Christian in the Tree of Woe.

Del Rio starts in on the arm by sending it into the barricade and it’s off to an early armbar. A top rope double stomp to the shoulder makes it even worse, but not as bad as it would be with the top rope double stomp out of the Tree of Woe. The champ misses a charge though and crashes out to the floor to give Christian a breather. Back in and Del Rio dives into a raised boot, followed by a middle rope missile dropkick for no cover. The high crossbody gets two but Christian is holding the arm.

It’s too early for the Killswitch so Christian goes up, only to get pulled off the middle rope with a Backstabber in a cool spot. A middle rope backsplash doesn’t work for the champ but he’s still able to block the spear (which Christian should NEVER use) with a dropkick. Del Rio takes down his kneepad but gets rolled up for two more. Now the spear connects, only to have the shoulder give out. That means a cross armbreaker and Christian taps (rather surprising) at 12:30.

Rating: B. I had a lot more fun with this than I was expecting, which I think is what I said when I watched this the first time around too. Christian was a great choice for a challenger at this level as he’s going to have a good match no matter what. Unfortunately this was about it for him as he would only wrestle a few more matches in 2013, then come back for another short run to start the new year, ending with a concussion that caused his retirement. It’s a shame, but probably for the best as you don’t want to mess with that area.

Post match Del Rio says the Mexican people need an idol and his name is Alberto Del Rio.

Clips from Summerslam Axxess, which has never come close to matching the Wrestlemania version.

Miz (oh yeah he’s here) talks to Maria Menunos, who won in a tag match at Axxess. Fandango and Summer Rae dance in again but this time Miz and Maria show them up with some dancing of their own. Did you know Maria Menunos of some entertainment show is here? If you don’t, you will when this is all over that show.

Natalya vs. Brie Bella

No story of note here, but Cole introduces the two of them as “some of the stars of Total Divas”. Just in case you thought Summerslam was the point here. Naturally more cast members are at ringside and sweet goodness I forgot how annoying this era was for the women. Feeling out process to start as Natalya tries to do any kind of wrestling with Brie. They finally go with the slapping until Natalya sends her outside for a baseball slide. The JBL and MICHAEL COLE chants start up and there’s the JERRY chant to complete the trio.

Brie grabs a chinlock and the fans want tables. A jawbreaker gets Natalya out of trouble and she grabs the Sharpshooter until Brie slips out and sends her hard into the corner. We get the required catfight on the floor and it’s time for a Zack Ryder chant. The yet to be named BRIE MODE knee seems to wake Natalya up as it’s the Sharpshooter to make Brie tap at 5:18.

Rating: D-. The match could have been so much worse but the story, or lack thereof, had this thing doomed from the start. This was back at the start of the Total Divas era and fans hadn’t gotten sick of the show yet. They don’t get along on Total Divas for whatever nonsense reason the writers have come up with so here’s a short match between them. Not horrible but sweet goodness could we please get the tiniest bit of effort?

Earlier today, Ryback poured soup on a catering worker.

We recap CM Punk vs. Brock Lesnar and I begin to smile. This is mainly about Punk vs. Paul Heyman, who had been Punk’s supporter for years. Then Punk started to change his attitude and told Heyman that he wanted to do this by himself. That wasn’t cool with Heyman, who cost him the Money in the Bank ladder match. Punk went after Heyman so Brock Lesnar returned to be Heyman’s muscle. The match was set with the great tagline “The Best vs. The Beast.” Do you need much more than that?

CM Punk vs. Brock Lesnar

No DQ. I know I say this a lot but Brock Lesnar coming down the aisle is one of the scariest sights in wrestling. Punk charges right at him and gets driven into the corner for some shoulders. A hard whip sends Punk into a different corner as the fans are trying to stay behind him. Punk’s strikes have almost no effect (Punk not being able to strike with an MMA guy? I’m sure that won’t be an even bigger joke three years later.) and Brock easily stomps him down in the corner.

Punk gets in a kick to the jaw and a pair of running knees knock Lesnar outside for a suicide dive. That’s exactly the kind of hope spot that the fans needed to get back into this but Lesnar cuts them off by slamming the steps, which are in Punk’s hands, straight into Punk’s face. Punk http://onhealthy.net/product-category/mental-disorders/ posts him though and scores with the clothesline off the barricade, only to make the mistake of going after Heyman.

One heck of a toss sends Punk over the announcers’ table as there’s not much of a way around that kind of power. That’s not good enough though as Brock throws him over the other table, just so it won’t feel left out. Lesnar jumps into a stomp onto a piece of the table onto Punk before sending him flying off a belly to belly (leaving a big sweat stain on the floor).

Back in and Lesnar fires off more shoulders to the ribs and we hit the bearhug. An elbow to the nose staggers Brock for a bit but he knees Punk hard in the ribs to put him down again. It’s back to the bearhug as they’re doing a good job with cutting off the hope spots. Punk kicks away but dives right into a fall away slam to cut him off again. A chinlock lasts for a little while until Punk fights up and bites the ear to escape.

Punk FINALLY drops him with a series of kicks and the running knee in the corner makes it even worse. Lesnar catches a running knee but Punk escapes and high kicks him down, setting up the Macho Elbow (looked awful, almost more like a sideways splash) for a pretty hot two. Neither finisher can connect so Punk kicks him in the head again and Brock goes down from a single shot. You don’t see that every day.

The GTS is countered into the Kimura but that’s reversed into a cross armbreaker and then a triangle choke. A powerbomb doesn’t break the hold so Brock lifts him up again, shrugs off the elbows to the head and PLANTS Punk with a running powerbomb. The fans are INSANE for Punk but Brock cuts them off with the most vicious Three Amigos you’ll ever see. Brock very slowly heads outside to grab a chair so Punk dives onto him, only to land on the chair, which lands on Lesnar to put both of them down.

It’s Punk up first with the chair though and he wears Brock out….until Lesnar just takes it away from him. That’s fine with Punk as a low blow gets him out of trouble (Punk: “WHERE’S YOUR CUP NOW UFC BOY???”) and freaks Heyman out all over again. Punk takes the chair up top and drops something like a Macho Elbow for two more. A few more chair shots have Lesnar in trouble until Heyman takes it away.

Punk grabs Heyman’s tie to block the F5 (smart) and it’s the GTS but Heyman makes the save for the false finish of the year. Reality sets in on Heyman (as only it can) and he realizes there’s no Brock to save him. Punk gives chase but runs into the F5, which he counters into a tornado DDT for two more. The Anaconda Vice goes on but Punk lets it go to cut Heyman off. A big right hand drops Paul, only to have Lesnar BLAST Punk with the chair. The F5 onto the chair finally ends Punk at 25:18.

Rating: A+. I gave this Match of the Year and I’m certainly not changing that now. This was a total war with Punk shocking the heck out of me by taking Lesnar to the limit. If nothing else, this is the textbook example of how to book Lesnar vs. a smaller guy. You even have Punk saving some face by having Heyman interfere so often. It’s an outstanding match and easily holds up four years later.

As I mentioned a few times, Punk was giving the fans just enough hope spots to keep things going. No one was going to buy Punk hanging in a fist fight with him (nor should they have bought it with HHH but that’s a long issue for another time) but they could buy him getting in a few shots here and there and giving it all he had. That’s wrestling storytelling in a nutshell and it was as entertaining as it could have been. If not for Punk vs. Cena in 2011, this would be Punk’s WWE masterpiece.

Punk pulls himself up and gets the hero’s ovation. It’s a shame that he would be gone in four months.

A fan agreed to trade tickets to a house show for three tickets to Summerslam and Summerslam Axxess if he took a splash from Mark Henry. Oh and he gets to sit ringside (meaning in front of the announcers’ tables for the next match). Well gee I wonder if that’s a hard decision.

Big E. Langston/AJ Lee vs. Dolph Ziggler/Kaitlyn

Former partners/couple who split up and absolutely no one is interested here. The guys start things off and it’s an early belly to belly to drop Ziggler. We hit an early abdominal stretch with a stomach claw thrown in as a bonus. Ziggler comes back with a dropkick and the too early to be a hot tag brings in the women. AJ spin kicks Kaitlyn down for two and it’s off to a cravate.

Back to back neckbreakers give AJ….an opportunity to dance around the ring, allowing Kaitlyn to kick her away. The hot tag brings in Dolph for another dropkick and his jumping elbows. Big E. is right back up with a powerbomb backbreaker for two with Kaitlyn making a save. A charge hits post though and Kaitlyn spears AJ in half on the floor. The Big Ending is countered and the Zig Zag gives Dolph the pin at 6:42.

Rating: D+. They didn’t have time to do much here and were in the death spot, which doesn’t work very well when they’re doing a TV match. It’s not terrible or anything and Kaitlyn spearing AJ is always entertaining. They were still getting ready to launch the Women’s Revolution down in NXT so this was about as good as you were going to get from the women at this point. Big E. vs. Ziggler kept going for a good while but never went anywhere, which is why New Day was the best thing that could have happened to Langston.

Fandango interrupts Miz again and finally gets punched out.

The Kickoff Show panel goes over their main event picks and talk about some of the show.

We recap John Cena vs. Daniel Bryan. Daniel had been on the roll of a lifetime and Cena was allowed to pick his challenger for Summerslam. Cena selected Daniel Bryan but Vince McMahon was suddenly against Bryan as the top star. It was clearly Bryan vs. the establishment and as a bonus, HHH will be guest referee for the title match. I’m sure nothing will come of it.

Bryan vs. Cena was built up as a big fight as well with Bryan calling Cena a phony who wasn’t here for the wrestling. Cena said he’s had his share of great matches but he’s had them while holding the WWE World Title. Bryan is the best competition around but the best isn’t going to be good enough.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Daniel Bryan

Bryan is challenging, Cena has a baseball sized amount of fluid in his elbow which is going to force him to leave almost immediately after this show, and HHH is guest referee. Cena headlocks him to the mat to start but Bryan armdrags him off. The test of strength drives Bryan down again but Cena can’t break his bridge in an impressive (and surprising) power display. The threat of a YES Lock sends Cena bailing out to the floor and we take a breather.

Back in and Bryan easily takes him down for a surfboard, only to have Cena kick him away without much effort. Cena kicks him into the steps and suplexes him off the steps for good measure. If quiets the YOU CAN’T WRESTLE chants for a few seconds but they’re quickly replaced by the YOU STILL SUCK chants. At least they’re consistent in their hatred. Back in and Cena powers him away again before countering a hurricanrana attempt with a sitout powerbomb.

We hit the chinlock for a bit until Cena powers up and fires off some kicks in the corner. Cena fights up again and tries the finishing sequence, only to have the Shuffle broken up with a kick to the face. The second attempt works a bit better though and is good for two but Bryan kicks him in the eye again. Cena is starting to sport a black eye but Bryan wisely starts going after the arm. A quick STF attempt is countered into an STF from Bryan but Cena makes the ropes.

The AA is countered straight into the YES Lock and Cena is in trouble. He powers out again so Bryan slaps on a guillotine as Cena just can’t shake him off for good. The hold is finally broken and Bryan is a bit surprised, allowing Cena to grab a quick AA for two. Cena heads up but Bryan is right there again with a superplex. Bryan hangs on and pulls himself back up for the Swan Dive and a very near fall.

The suicide dive is blocked with a hard forearm and now the top rope Fameasser is good for two. With a one and one record up top, Cena tries it again, this time loading Bryan up for a super AA. Bryan tries a super hurricanrana to counter but Cena counters into what looked like an attempt at a Styles Clash, only to drop Bryan SQUARE ON HIS HEAD with a scary sounding thud.

The STF goes on but breaks down a bit with Cena winding up on his side, allowing Bryan to flip over into the YES Lock. Cena makes the rope again so Bryan goes back to the strikes with the running corner dropkicks. That’s fine with Cena, who turns Bryan inside out with the hard clothesline. NOW the fans are into both guys and there’s no reason for them to not be.

They slug it out until a double clothesline puts both guys down for another breather. Cena slaps Bryan hard in the face so Bryan does the same right back but Cena powers him up for the AA. That’s countered into a hard DDT though and Cena is in trouble again. One heck of a kick to the head drops Cena and Bryan debuts the running knee for the pin and the title in a shocking finish at 26:55.

Rating: A+. Yeah this worked too. The fact that Bryan pinned him clean was the completely correct call as the win is what matters, not the title itself. Bryan looks like the biggest star in the world now and this is confirmation that WWE sees him as a top name. The fact that it was an outstanding match helps things even better, but that ending is still perfect. Bryan beat Cena down and then hit a finisher to pin him. What else could he possibly ask for? Well, save for what came at Wrestlemania of course but sweet goodness this was outstanding stuff.

Cena stares Bryan down but shakes his hand. Pyro and confetti go off….and here’s Mr. Money in the Bank Randy Orton. Randy holds up the case at ringside so Bryan says bring it. Orton turns around and walks away, leaving HHH (who called the match right down the line and was a complete non-factor) to turn on Bryan and lay him out with the Pedigree.

Raw World Title: Randy Orton vs. Daniel Bryan

Faster than I can type Orton is challenging (ok not really), he wins the title at 8 seconds.

The crowd is eerily quiet as HHH hands Orton the title to end the show.

Overall Rating: A-. Everything that needed to be great was WAY beyond great and everything else was as forgettable (and thankfully short) as it needed to be. The whole thing that matters here are two matches combining for over fifty minutes (remember that it’s less than three hours long) and they’re both instant Match of the Year candidates. This show is an absolute classic and well worth checking out for the last great pre-Network shows.

Ratings Comparison

Rob Van Dam vs. Dean Ambrose

Original: B-

2014 Redo: B-

2017 Redo: D+

Bray Wyatt vs. Kane

Original: D+

2014 Redo: D

2017 Redo: F+

Damien Sandow vs. Cody Rhodes

Original: C

2014 Redo: D+

2017 Redo: C+

Alberto Del Rio vs. Christian

Original: B+

2014 Redo: B

2017 Redo: B

Brie Bella vs. Natalya

Original: F

2014 Redo: D-

2017 Redo: D-

Brock Lesnar vs. CM Punk

Original: A+

2014 Redo: A+

2017 Redo: A+

Big E. Langston/AJ Lee vs. Dolph Ziggler/AJ Lee

Original: C-

2014 Redo: D+

2017 Redo: D+

Daniel Bryan vs. John Cena

Original: A+

2014 Redo: A+

2017 Redo: A+

Randy Orton vs. Daniel Bryan

Original: N/A

2014 Redo: N/A

2017 Redo: N/A

Overall Rating

Original: A-

2014 Redo: A

2017 Redo: A-

What is up with that opener? I really liked it that much earlier on?

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/08/18/summerslam-2013-a-star-is-born/

And the 2014 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2014/08/16/summerslam-count-up-2013-2014-redo-what-a-difference-a-year-makes/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Summerslam 2013
Date: August 18, 2013
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 14,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield

This show was almost universally the Show of the Year for 2013 and I’ve been really interested in seeing how it holds up. There’s a double main event with Cena vs. Bryan for the World Title and Lesnar vs. Punk in Punk’s attempt to get revenge on Lesnar’s manager Paul Heyman for screwing him over back in July. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: US Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Dean Ambrose

Dean is making a rare defense here after Rob won a battle royal or something. Feeling out process to start with Dean saying bring it on. They trade hammerlocks until Rob nails a running shoulder and a kick to the jaw. Rob hammers away in the corner but runs into a boot to give Dean control. A neckbreaker gives Ambrose a two count and the fans are split on who they like best.

Dean hits the dropkick against the ropes and puts on a chinlock. Thankfully it doesn’t last long though and Rob comes back with a quick moonsault, only to walk into a clothesline for two. The bulldog driver is broken up by some more kicks to the face but Rollins and Reigns come out to break up the Five Star. This brings out Mark Henry and Big Show to even things up as we take a break.

Back with Dean dropping an elbow for two and putting on a cross face chicken wing of all things. Rob is sent outside and the four seconds have a standoff. Dean goes out to get Rob and winds up getting caught by the spinning kick to the back for two. A spinning legdrop gets the same for Van Dam but he walks into a spinebuster. Dean misses a middle rope elbow but a Shield distraction lets him get two off a rollup. Rolling Thunder sets up the Five Star but Reigns spears Van Dam for the DQ.

Rating: B-. Good match here but the ending didn’t work. What was the point of having Big Show and Henry out there if they’re just going to have Reigns come in with no resistance for a DQ? It really is amazing how far Van Dam has fallen in the last year as I wouldn’t expect him to have this kind of a match today if his life depended on it.

Miz, the host of the show, welcomes us to the evening and runs down the big matches. He would be kind of perfect for this role today too. Fandango and Summer Rae cut him off….and that’s it.

The opening video focuses o how awesome Los Angeles is as well as the double main events. The overblown voiceover really works.

Jojo from Total Divas sings the National Anthem.

Bray Wyatt vs. Kane

This is a Ring of Fire match, meaning an Inferno match but you win by pin or submission. It’s also Bray’s in ring debut. Kane hammers away in the corner to start and we get the old school idea of the flames going up whenever anyone hits the mat. Harper and Rowan keep getting closer to the ring but have to back away from the flames. Bray comes back with headbutts but can’t get Kane up for a suplex.

Kane gets sent into the corner for a running splash followed by the cross body to put him down. A bunch of right hands have Kane in more trouble but he comes back with a running clothesline in the corner. There’s the side slam to send the flames up even more, preventing the Family from sending Bray a kendo stick. Rowan tries a fire extinguisher but the flames don’t go out. Kane hits a pair of chokeslams and calls for a tombstone, only to have Rowan and Harper cover the flames and come to beat Kane down. The yet to be named Sister Abigail gives Bray the pin at 7:45.

Rating: D. This wasn’t so much bad as much as it was really stupid. Bray looks like a joke in his first match (though he would have FAR better performances in the future) and the flames are more of an annoyance than the focus of the match. The Family coming in didn’t work and makes the whole thing look ridiculous.

Post match Bray sits in his chair while the Family crushes Kane’s head with the steps. They carry Kane away which never went anywhere.

The expert panel (Booker T., Shawn Michaels and Vickie Guerrero) chat about what we just saw and make some main event predictions.

Earlier tonight Paul Heyman compared Punk vs. Lesnar to David vs. Goliath. He sees the battles ending a bit differently. Tonight’s match is now no DQ.

Damien Sandow vs. Cody Rhodes

Sandow screwed over his friend Cody to become Mr. Money in the Bank and Rhodes is ticked off. On the way to the ring, Damien talks about famous teams and says there has always been a leader and a sidekick. Cody has recently shaved off his mustache and Cole tells us we can find out why he has done so on Friday on Youtube. Seriously.

Sandow charges at him to start and hammers away in the corner but Cody comes back with a backdrop to take over. The release gordbuster gets two for Cody but Damien hammers away on him in the corner and cranks on the arms. The Wind-Up Elbow gets two and we hit an old school Edgecator (kneeling Sharpshooter) to Cody.

That goes nowhere either as Rhodes fights up and hits a MuscleBuster of all things for two. A springboard missile dropkick sets up the Disaster Kick but Sandow comes back with a swinging neckbreaker. Cody nails a second attempt at the Disaster Kick for two but Cody misses a charge into the post. Again it doesn’t seem to matter as Cross Rhodes gets the pin on Sandow at 6:40.

Rating: D+. This could have been on any given Smackdown and really doesn’t mean anything. The idea was for Cody to eventually take the briefcase from Sandow but they dropped the whole idea and hooked Cody up with Goldust, which wound up being better for everyone involved. It didn’t last long but at least it was an idea. Sandow has fallen through the floor in a year and Cody is a completely different character.

Video on Christian’s career.

World Heavyweight Title: Alberto Del Rio vs. Christian

Another match where both guys have completely changed course in a year. Christian is challenging after winning a triple threat a few weeks back. We’re ready to go after some big match intros and some gawking at Lillian in a gray dress. They lock up and head into the corner to start with the champion grabbing a headlock. Del Rio gets him to chase him around the ring but gets his throat snapped across the top rope.

Alberto breaks up a top rope hurricanrana and ties Christian in the Tree of Woe for some stomping. Back to the floor with Christian being sent into the barricade to start the arm work. A release flapjack and a kick to the head allows Del Rio to wrap the arm around the ropes. Christian sends him back outside and hits a big plancha to take the champion down, followed by a missile dropkick back inside.

The Canadian hammers away in the corner, ducks the running enziguri, and gets two off a top rope cross body. The Killswitch is countered into a Backstabber for two as Alberto is starting to get frustrated. There’s a jumping back elbow to the jaw from Christian but Del Rio counters a sunset flip out of the corner with a right hand.

Instead a top rope hurricanrana gets two for Christian and Del Rio is in trouble. It’s not enough trouble for him to get speared though as Del Rio dropkicks him in the face for a sweet counter. The low superkick gets two more for Alberto. He tries it again but gets rolled up for two. Christian finally hits the spear but injures his bad shoulder, setting up the cross armbreaker to retain Del Rio’s title at 12:28.

Rating: B. Good match here with both guys going back and forth until the logical and thought out ending. I love it when you have an old injury coming back from earlier in the match to tie into the ending, even though it’s not something you see often enough. It’s also nice to see a high level guy tapping out to a heel submission, which you see even less often.

Del Rio says he’s the Latino representative.

WWE loves the National Guard.

Video on Axxess from earlier today. Maria Menunos had a match and talks to Miz about how awesome that was. Fandango and Summer Rae interrupt with some more dancing, triggering a dance from Maria and Miz.

Natalya vs. Brie Bella

This is the Total Divas match. You can add Natalya to the list of people who have fallen through the floor in a year. She has the Funkadactyls with her while Brie has Nikki and Eva Marie. I’m not sure who has the better backup here. Feeling out process to start with both girls doing their best choreographed spots. Brie slaps her in the face but has to head to the ropes to avoid a Sharpshooter attempt.

Natalya is sent to the floor and caught with a baseball slide to the back as a JBL chant starts up. Now it’s a Michael Cole chant, followed by the required Jerry version. Brie drops a leg and cranks on a chinlock as the fans want tables. Natalya fights up and puts on a quick Sharpshooter but Brie sends her into the corner. The other Divas get into it on the floor and we hit another chinlock from Brie. Back up and a sunset flip is countered into a Sharpshooter to make Brie tap at 4:19.

Rating: D-. Well that happened. It doesn’t hold up, the fans don’t care, and the whole thing is a waste of time. The girls didn’t even look all that great here as most of their outfits looked like they belonged in the 1950s. The fact that Total Divas didn’t get the Divas Title off of AJ continues to astound me.

Ryback harassed a catering guy earlier in the day.

We recap Lesnar vs. Punk. The idea is simple: both guys are Paul Heyman Guys, but then Punk started listening to the fans and asked Heyman to stop coming out for his matches. Heyman turned on him and cost Punk Money in the Bank, so Punk swore revenge. Brock Lesnar returned and laid out Punk, with Heyman eventually revealing that he asked Brock to come back and destroy Punk, despite swearing he didn’t.

Punk is out for revenge but has to go through Lesnar to get there. The title for the match was perfect: The Best vs. The Beast. I love the story behind this: yeah it’s about revenge, but it won’t be settled in a debate or by lawyers or something stupid like that. Instead, it’s going to be scheduled in a professional wrestling match, like every feud should be.

Brock Lesnar vs. CM Punk

No DQ. Punk charges right at him but gets driven into the corner. Forearms to Brock’s head have no effect and he drives shoulders into the ribs. Punk tries some knees to the ribs but Brock literally tosses him across the ring. Brock stomps him down in the corner but Punk comes back with a hard knee to the jaw and a second one to send him out to the floor. A big suicide dive has the Beast down and Heyman is starting to freak out.

Punk gets some steps but Brock just rams them back into his face to take over again. He throws Punk onto his should but gets posted instead, allowing Punk to dive off the apron to drop Brock again. A clothesline off the announcers’ table nails Lesnar but Punk makes the mistake of going after Heyman, allowing Brock to blindside him. Brock picks him up again and LAUNCHES him over the announcers’ table. Then he throws him over the other table and stomps on the top of the table on top of Punk.

Back in and Punk goes after the legs but Brock just levels him with a clothesline. We hit the bearhug until Punk scores with forearms, only to take a hard knee to the ribs. It’s almost total dominace by Brock so far. Back to the bearhug but Punk elbows out of it again. Some kicks to the chest have Brock in trouble but he counters a high cross body into a fall away slam.

We hit the chinlock but Punk bites his ear to escape. More kicks have Brock in trouble and a top rope knee sends him sprawling across the ring. There’s a pair of running knees in the corner but Brock counters the third one into the F5. Punk escapes again and nails a high kick followed by the Macho Elbow (more like a splash) for a VERY close two. The fans are totally into this.

The GTS is countered into another F5 attempt but Punk escapes and nails another high kick. He tries the GTS again but gets caught in the Kimura. Somehow he counters that into a cross armbreaker but Brock rolls over into a choke. Punk counters THAT into a triangle choke, only to have Brock lift him for a powerbomb. That doesn’t break the hold either and it’s back to the triangle, but Brock lifts him into another powerbomb, this time with a running start. AMAZING sequence there and the fans give it the THIS IS AWESOME chant that it deserves.

Brock busts out Three Amigos of all things for two. Punk is half dead in the ring so Brock heads outside and gets a chair. He takes too long though and Punk dives onto the chair, driving it into Lesnar in a huge crash. Now it’s Punk wearing out Brock with the chair as they head back inside. Brock takes the chair away, only to get hit low before he can destroy Punk. Punk nails the Cactus Jack chair drop from the top for two as Heyman is pacing back and forth.

Punk just starts beating Brock with the chair but Heyman gets on the apron for a distraction. Lesnar lifts him for the F5 but Punk grabs Heyman for the block. He slips off Lesnar’s back and hits the GTS for a white hot near fall with Heyman making the save. After a quick chase, Punk charges into the F5 but counters AGAIN into a DDT for another two.

There’s the Anaconda Vice and Lesnar is in trouble, drawing Heyman in with the chair….but Punk gets up and steps on it. There’s a right hand for Heyman and a Vice of his own, but Punk is wide open for a chair shot from Lesnar. A bunch more chair shots sets up an F5 on the chair to give Brock the pin on Punk’s dead body at 29:07.
Rating: A+. I said this was Match of the Year last year and a second viewing affirms that view. This was AMAZING with some great David vs. Goliath stuff, a white hot counter sequence, and then two guys just beating the tar out of each other for ten minutes to end the match. Heyman making the save made sense, but it makes Punk look like the superhero that everyone thought he was. Totally awesome match here and Lesnar looks like the monster that he’s supposed to.

Oh and one more thing: SCREW YOU HHH FOR WASTING BROCK FOR A YEAR FOR YOUR STUPID EGO. Seriously, a year of this lost for that “trilogy” nonsense with HHH winning the big match on the biggest stage before letting Brock get his win back in a totally forgotten cage match. Lucky us.

Punk gets the well deserved standing ovation.

A fan gets splashed by Mark Henry for Summerslam tickets. He gets to sit in front of the announcers’ table for the next match.

Dolph Ziggler/Kaitlyn vs. Big E. Langston/AJ Lee

Two feuds combined into one. The guys start with Ziggler nailing a fast dropkick for two on Big E. Langston comes right back with a belly to belly suplex and a spinning Warrior Splash for two of his own before we hit the abdominal stretch. Dolph quickly escapes and scores with another dropkick before it’s off to the girls. Kaitlyn throws her around but gets caught by a big kick to the face.

A back elbow gets two for Lee and she hooks a sleeper. AJ shouts a lot but gets caught with a shoulder block. Back to the guys and there are the ten elbow drops from Dolph. The Fameasser misses and Big E. hooks a tilt-a-while backbreaker for two. AJ takes out Kaitlyn with a Shining Wizard but Big E. hits the post. Kaitlyn spears AJ in half (I miss her selling the heck out of that move) as Big E. gets back up and runs over Dolph. The Big Ending doesn’t work though and the Zig Zag gives Dolph the pin at 5:46.

Rating: D+. I feel sorry for this match as it was a glorified TV match that had to go after a thirty minute masterpiece. These four feuded for a long time and it was getting boring by this time. AJ would hold the Divas Title for a ridiculous eight more months and Kaitlyn doesn’t even have a job anymore. Again, it’s amazing how much a year has changed.

Miz gets cut off by Fandango and Summer again, finally causing Miz to knock him out.

The expert panel makes their World Title match picks.

We recap Cena vs. Bryan. The idea here is simple: Bryan had been on a roll and Cena was allowed to pick his opponent for Summerslam. He summed it up in four words: “I select Daniel Bryan.” This was the start of Bryan being a B+ player as authority (not The Authority) figures started saying Bryan was just too small to be World Champion. HHH and Vince tried to turn him corporate but Bryan couldn’t bring himself to do it because it wasn’t who he was. The only person that seems to be supporting him is HHH, who is guest referee tonight.

At the same time they actually made it somewhat personal between Cena and Bryan as Daniel called Cena out for being a parody of a wrestler. Cena got very serious and said that he was a wrestler even if he wore bright t-shirts. He chose Bryan because he’s the best competition in the company right now and has earned the spot. Cena also has fluid the size of a baseball in his elbow at the moment and is going to be taking time off after the match.

WWE Title: Daniel Bryan vs. John Cena

Cena is defending and HHH is guest referee. Daniel wisely goes after the bad arm to start but gets taken down with a headlock. Back up and Cena isn’t sure what to make of Bryan and his technical abilities. John easily wins a test of strength but Bryan bridges off the mat. Cena jumps down on him but can’t break the bridge in a nice display of strength by the bearded one. A YES Lock attempt sends Cena out to the floor for a breather.

Back in and Cena uses the bad arm for a headlock before they hit the mat for the old Flair bridge up into a backslide from Bryan for two. It’s Bryan in control now but Cena blocks the surfboard with pure power. Daniel is sent to the apron and knocked into the announcers’ table with a hard shoulder. Cena is wrestling as the heel here by default as the power guy.

Bryan pops up and whips Cena into the steps but Cena sends him in as well. Fans to Cena: “YOU STILL SUCK!” Back in and Cena hammers away to get the upper hand but lets Bryan get up. A sitout powerbomb gets two for the champion and we hit the chinlock. Bryan is quickly back up with right hands as Jerry reminds us that HHH is guest referee. He hasn’t meant anything yet.

Bryan backflips over Cena out of the corner and nails the running clothesline. Here come the YES Kicks but the big one misses, allowing Cena to initiate his finishing sequence. The Shuffle gets two and Bryan nails the big kick to the head for the same. Bryan finally starts going after the arm by snapping it over his own shoulder and firing off kicks to the elbow. Cena tries a quick STF but Bryan mule kicks his way out. Now it’s Bryan putting Cena in the STF but he can’t crank on it as well.

Cena powers up but gets caught in Rolling Germans. Cena powers out of the third suplex and tries the AA, only to be reversed into the YES Lock. Bryan can’t quite get it on and Cena gets his head out of the grip to escape. That’s fine with Daniel who slaps on the guillotine choke. Again I had to hear Cole say HHH’s name to remember that he was the referee. Cena powers up again and drives Bryan into the buckle a few times before finally grabbing a rope for the break.

An AA connects out of nowhere for two and Cena is getting frustrated. He goes up top but Bryan breaks up the top rope Fameasser. A running dropkick has Cena reeling and Bryan superplexes him down, only to hook his feet on the ropes to stay up top. That’s kind of brilliant actually. The Swan Dive connects for two and Cena rolls outside. The FLYING GOAT is countered by a forearm to the face and the top rope Fameasser gets John another two count.

Cena goes up again but gets caught, only to try to slam Daniel down. Instead we get a TERRIFYING semi-botch as Cena almost piledrives him off the top. Thankfully Bryan’s neck is in one piece (for now) as Cena puts him in the STF. He pulls back too far though and Bryan slips out to apply the YES Lock. Cena is right next to the ropes for the break though and both guys are exhausted.

It’s Bryan up first with the running dropkicks but he tries one too many, allowing Cena to take his head off with a running clothesline. They slug it out again until both guys try flying shoulders and knock each other out again. Back up and they slap it out as the fans are even more into it now. Cena catches him charging and plants Bryan with a spinebuster. Allegedly Bryan countered with a DDT but it didn’t come off that well on camera.

It’s Daniel to his feet first and going up top, only to have Cena counter his high cross body into an AA. Daniel counters that into the small package for two, followed by a BIG kick to the head. He doesn’t cover, but instead debuts the running knee to the chest for the 100% clean pin over Cena (I believe the first since Rock at Wrestlemania) for the pin and the title at 31:07.

Rating: A+. Yep this worked too. This is a totally different style of main event match and it more than holds up a year later. There was a solid story in there of Bryan being as technical as he could be and Cena just muscling his way through it, only to have Bryan knee his head off for the pin. Excellent match, but somehow it’s the second best of the night and of the year.

Post match Cena is upset but hands Bryan the title and raises his hand with no violence.

Bryan celebrates for about three minutes….and here’s Mr. Money in the Bank Randy Orton. Bryan is ready for him, but not ready for HHH to spin him around for a Pedigree.

WWE Title: Randy Orton vs. Daniel Bryan

Orton is champion in 8 seconds.

The new heel forces pose to end the show.

Overall Rating: A. This won Show of the Year and it’s easy to see why. The two main events are more than enough to make this awesome but you also have good stuff like Del Rio vs. Christian. Nothing was truly horrible here (the Divas match was just over four minutes so how much can it really hurt?) and two instant classics make this more than great and one of the best shows WWE ever put on.

Ratings Comparison

Rob Van Dam vs. Dean Ambrose

Original:
Redo: B-

Bray Wyatt vs. Kane

Original: D+
Redo: D

Damien Sandow vs. Cody Rhodes

Original: C
Redo: D+

Alberto Del Rio vs. Christian

Original: B+
Redo: B

Brie Bella vs. Natalya

Original: F
Redo: D-

Brock Lesnar vs. CM Punk

Original: A+
Redo: A+

Big E. Langston/AJ Lee vs. Kaitlyn/Dolph Ziggler

Original: C-
Redo: D+

Daniel Bryan vs. John Cena

Original: A+
Redo: A+

Overall Rating:

Original: A-
Redo: A

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

 

Summerslam 2013
Date: August 18, 2013
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

Pre-Show: US Title: Dean Ambrose vs. Rob Van Dam

Back with Ambrose still in control with shots to the chest and a cross face chicken wing. An ECW chant starts up as Ambrose transitions into a sleeper. Rob is sent to the floor but the giants block Shield from interfering. Dean goes out to stare as well but gets kicked down by Van Dam, allowing Rob to put him on the barricade for the spin kick from the apron.

The opening video focuses on the main events and not much more.

Kane vs. Bray Wyatt

Rating: D+. This was disappointing. The visuals were cool but just putting a blanket over the flames was a pretty lame way to have the monsters get inside. I was expecting something a bit more supernatural instead of fire safety tips with the Wyatt Family. Also what was up with those botches?

The expert panel of Booker T, Shawn Michaels and Vickie Guerrero talk about the match a bit.

We get part of a Heyman promo from the pre show as the fire stuff is removed. Punk vs. Lesnar is now No DQ.

Damien Sandow vs. Cody Rhodes

Smackdown World Title: Christian vs. Alberto Del Rio

Christian won a three way to get the shot and has pinned Del Rio twice in the last few weeks. Alberto makes Lillian do his intro in Spanish in a nice touch. Christian quickly sends Del Rio out to the floor but misses a baseball slide. Back in and Del Rio escapes a top rope rana attempt and hits an enziguri to send Christian into the Tree of Woe. Alberto fires off kicks to the chest and a running one somewhere near the shoulder.

Axxess stuff, including Maria Menunos in a Divas tag match.

Brie Bella vs. Natalya

CM Punk vs. Brock Lesnar

Lesnar brags a bit too much and Punk gets in a kick to the head and a pair of knees to the face to send Brock to the floor. The suicide dive takes Lesnar down and the fans go NUTS. Punk loads up the steps but Brock rams into them to knock Punk down. Brock fires off knees to the ribs but Punk posts him for a breather. A top rope dive puts Brock down again as Punk is giving this all he has. Punk dives off the announce table with a clothesline and Brock is in trouble.

CM makes the mistake of going after Heyman though and Brock gets in a shot to take over. Brock tosses Punk over the announce table in an amazing throw for an even better crash. Since he threw Punk over the table once, Lesnar has to throw him over the other side for good measure. An over head belly to belly sends Punk down onto the concrete and Punk is barely moving. Back in and Brock drives Punk into the corner with shoulders and puts on a bearhug.

Rating: A+. The storytelling and psychology alone made this a great match. I loved the idea that Punk kept taking the weapons away from Lesnar but once Brock got in the first chair shot the match was over. Punk showed he was smarter leading up to the match but his hatred for Heyman cost him in the end when he went on emotion instead of intelligence.

The action in this was incredible as well as it felt like a fight instead of a match, which is the right idea. If nothing else, this shows how bad of an idea the HHH feud was. Punk and Cena have both blown away all of the HHH matches with Lesnar by miles and miles, but we got a year of HHH and a month each of the other guys so far. Such is life in the WWE. Outstanding match here though.

We get a clip from Axxess where a fan took a splash from Mark Henry for three tickets to Summerslam.

Kaitlyn/Dolph Ziggler vs. AJ Lee/Big E. Langston

Rating: C-. This was fine but it was in the death spot on the card between the two main events. It came off well enough though and the crowd was into it at times. It was a WAY better idea than putting the Total Divas match here which I thought they were going to do. Nothing great but it did its job just fine.

Fandango and Summer Rae cut off Miz again so he lays Fandango out.

Some low level celebrities are here.

The expert panel make their predictions on the main event. Bryan is the favorite.

Raw World Title: Daniel Bryan vs. John Cena

Bryan flips out of the AA and catches a charging Cena in the chin with a boot. The missile dropkick connects for two and Bryan fires off the kicks to the chest. Now Bryan goes after the bad arm before slapping on the STF of all things. Cena is about to get to the ropes so Bryan pulls him back and hits two German suplexes for two each. Bryan counters the AA into the YES Lock and Cena is in big trouble. Cena counters by getting his head free (wrestling you say?) but gets pulled down into a guillotine choke.

John FINALLY powers out of it but can barely follow up. Bryan charges right at Cena but gets caught in the AA for a close two. That came out of nowhere and had the fans inhaling in unison. Cena goes up but has to knock Bryan down twice before getting caught by a running dropkick. Now Bryan gets up top and superplexes Cena down but stays on top in a cool power move. He sits up onto the top for the Swan Dive but Cena is up at two. John rolls to the floor and blocks the FLYING GOAT with a forearm to the head.

Rating: A+. WHAT A BRILLIANT FINISH! They totally fooled us all by having the standard WWE formula playing out but Bryan wins it out of nowhere with a knee to the head. Brilliant move there after a great match to boot. What more can you ask for in the main event of the second biggest show of the year? Excellent stuff and HHH did absolutely nothing at all.

Raw World Title: Randy Orton vs. Daniel Bryan

Seven seconds and Orton wins.

Everyone is shocked to end the show.

Results

Bray Wyatt b. Kane – Sister Abigail

Cody Rhodes b. Damien Sandow – Cross Rhodes

Alberto Del Rio b. Christian – Cross Armbreaker

Natalya b. Brie Bella – Sharpshooter

Brock Lesnar b. CM Punk – F5 onto a chair

Dolph Ziggler/Kaitlyn b. AJ Lee/Big E. Langston – Zig Zag to Langston

Daniel Bryan b. John Cena – Shining Wizard

Randy Orton b. Daniel Bryan – Pin after a Pedigree from HHH

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Summerslam 2011
Date: August 14, 2011
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 17.404
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Booker T

The guitarist from Tool plays the national anthem.

Kofi Kingston/John Morrison/Rey Mysterio vs. Awesome Truth/Alberto Del Rio

Sheamus vs. Mark Henry

Divas Title: Kelly Kelly vs. Beth Phoenix

Kelly is defending in your standard Barbie vs. monster feud and has Eve Torres in her corner. Beth on the other hand has Natalya. Kelly goes straight after her to start and fires off some forearms in the corner to send Beth outside, followed by a middle rope cross body to the floor. Back in and Beth knocks her out of the corner to take over before we hit a quick chinlock. An over the shoulder backrbeaker (good move for Beth) has Kelly in trouble and Beth ties her in the Tree of Woe to make it even worse. Kelly gets knocked around in the corner but counters the Glam Slam into a victory roll to retain at 6:33.

Rating: D+. Total squash for the most part here with a fluke ending, albeit the same fluke ending to almost every Kelly vs. Beth match ever. Kelly certainly got her push because of her looks but she was getting much better in the ring near the end of her career with matches like this one being far more watchable than some of the disasters that the division hard around this time.

Daniel Bryan vs. Wade Barrett

The California National Guard is here.

Smackdown World Title: Christian vs. Randy Orton

Christian is defending and this is no holds barred but first the champ has a big surprise for everyone as he brings out Edge. After an insane ovation, Edge thanks the fans but reminds them that he can never compete again due to his neck injuries. He was kind of glad that he left when he did though because it opened the door for Christian to become champion.

Video on WWE taking over Los Angeles for the week, including an Axxess.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. CM Punk

Punk finally escapes and puts Cena down for a breather, earning a loud CM PUNK chant. Off to a body vice as this match seems to be collapsing under the weight of the expectations from the previous match. Back up and Punk snaps his throat across the top rope to block a superplex attempt, followed by dropkicking Cena out to the floor. That goes nowhere so Punk grabs a seated abdominal stretch, only to have Cena power up into a spinning slam for a breather. Fans: “FRUITY PEBBLES!”

Raw World Title: CM Punk vs. Alberto Del Rio

Punk is defending and loses the title to an enziguri in eleven seconds.

A quick celebration ends the show.

Ratings Comparison

Kofi Kingston/John Morrison/Rey Mysterio vs. Awesome Truth/Alberto Del Rio

Original: B-

2013 Redo: B-

2016 Redo: B-

Mark Henry vs. Sheamus

Original: C

2013 Redo: C+

2016 Redo: C+

Beth Phoenix vs. Kelly Kelly

Original: C+

2013 Redo: D+

2016 Redo: D+

Wade Barrett vs. Daniel Bryan

Original: B

2013 Redo: B+

2016 Redo: B

Christian vs. Randy Orton

Original: B+

2013 Redo: A-

2016 Redo: A

CM Punk vs. John Cena

Original: A+

2013 Redo: B+

2016 Redo: B+

Alberto Del Rio vs. CM Punk

Original: N/A

2013 Redo: N/A

2016 Redo: N/A

Overall Rating

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A

2016 Redo: A

I think we can call this my definitive thoughts on the show as the ratings were almost identical in the last two reviews. Definitely check this one out.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/14/summerslam-2011-that-was-i-need-a-cigarette/

And the 2013 redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/08/16/summerslam-count-up-2011-a-screwy-ending-isnt-a-bad-thing/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6