Royal Rumble Count-Up – 2001 (2024 Edition): And We’re Done

Royal Rumble 2001
Date: January 21, 2001
Location: New Orleans Arena, New Orleans, Louisiana
Attendance: 16,056
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s been a bit since I’ve looked at this one and it’s still one of the more fondly remembered Rumbles. The WWF is on fire at the moment and the big story is the return of Steve Austin, who wants the WWF Title back. Said title is currently help by Kurt Angle, who is defending against HHH. Let’s get to it.

The opening video focuses on how this could be several people’s only chance to be WWF Champion. People like Albert! Billy Gunn! The Rock! Undertaker! The Rock and Undertaker again!

Tag Team Titles: Dudley Boyz vs. Edge and Christian

Edge and Christian are defending and the Dudleys are getting over concussions (because you could just wrestle with them back in the day). The Dudleys start fast, not even waiting for the recap video to end. They fight to the floor for a bit with the Dudleys keeping them in trouble. Back in and D-Von slugs away at Edge, followed by a neckbreaker.

Christian comes in and gets double shouldered for two as commentary talks about the. I Dudleys’ concussions (which don’t seem to be bothering them). A headscissors out of the corner puts Bubba down and he grabs his head, even as he takes Christian into the corner. D-Von comes in but gets Russian legsweeped and neckbreakered for a pair of two’s.

The chinlock goes on and Bubba gets to play cheerleader (which is quite the disturbing visual). Naturally the fans want tables as D-Von counters out of a piledriver and catapults Edge into Christian. A double clothesline leaves everyone but Bubba down, meaning it’s a tag…which the referee doesn’t see.

Bubba argues with the referee, leaving D-Von to have to duck a Conchairto attempt. Another clothesline is enough to bring Bubba back in to clean house, including a Bubba Bomb to send Christian outside. There’s What’s Up to Edge so naturally it’s table time. Christian breaks it up but Bubba rolls Edge up for two. The 3D is broken up as well, with Edge’s spear getting two on Bubba. Edge tries his own What’s Up but a quick reversal means it hits Christian. The 3D gives us new champions at 10:04.

Rating: B-. This is one of those pairings that is virtually impossible to screw up and they seem to understand that concept. You could run these teams and the Hardys for pretty much ever and the WWF did just that to some great success. This wasn’t even a great match, but it was more than entertaining enough to start the show off and keep the fans interested. The title change to cap it off made things even better so nice job early on.

During Heat, Drew Carey arrived. I’m sure that won’t go anywhere.

Earlier tonight, Vince McMahon clarified that Steve Austin will be in the Royal Rumble tonight despite getting in a fight with HHH, which violated an agreement. Kurt Angle caused the fight though and therefore everything is still on. This was more to clarify some confusion and that’s a good thing.

HHH and Stephanie McMahon are in their locker room, with HHH saying that he needs her to put her hatred for Trish Stratus aside during the title match aside. Stephanie says if Trish puts her nose….or anything else in their way, she’ll deal with her. Drew Carey comes in, says he hasn’t been watching much lately, and talks about running into Kamala at the airport. HHH tries to shoo him away, so Drew plugs his upcoming comedy pay per view and goes to find Vince McMahon. Stephanie offers to take him to meet Trish Stratus. This was prime Stephanie “NO ONE TALKS LIKE THIS AND YOU’RE NOT SCARY”.

The APA show each other their Rumble numbers and think it’ll be interesting. Crash Holly comes in and says they may be friends but he’ll eliminate them if he has to. Bradshaw: “And they call us drunks.”

We recap Chris Jericho vs. Chris Benoit in a ladder match for the Intercontinental Title. They’ve been feuding for a good while so it’s time for the big blowoff match. This isn’t a feud that needs that much of of a story and WWE seems to get that.

Intercontinental Title: Chris Benoit vs. Chris Jericho

Benoit is defending in a ladder match. They go right after it to start with Jericho elbowing him down. Jericho stomps away in the corner but has to block a Crossface attempt. Benoit sends him into the post but Jericho knocks him to the apron. The triangle dropkick misses and they fall out to the floor so let’s go for the ladder. Jericho’s baseball slide misses the ladder so Benoit sends him hard into the steps.

It’s way too early for Benoit to go up so Jericho cuts him off without much trouble. A running ladder shot to the face drops Benoit and Jericho puts the ladder over the top rope. Benoit reverses a whip to send Jericho into the ladder and out to the floor, only to have the dive cut off with a chair to the head (that was nasty). Jericho misses a ladder shot so Benoit chairs him down and we’ll go outside, complete with the ladder.

They go into the corner, where Jericho kind of Russian legsweeps him from the middle rope and down with the ladder for another crash. Benoit is up first and puts the ladder on the top, with Jericho sending him face first. That’s not enough as it’s a slingshot with the ladder to send it into Benoit’s face again. Jericho starts going up but Benoit suplexes him over the top and out to the floor for another nasty landing.

Now it’s Benoit going up, but Jericho is back in and grabs the Walls on top of the ladder in one of the most creatively awesome spots I’ve ever seen. Somehow that’s not enough as Benoit crashes down but pops up to shove the ladder down again. The Crossface makes Jericho tap, so Benoit goes up.

The Swan Dive from the top of the ladder misses though, allowing Jericho to put the ladder on top of him. Benoit powers out of that as well and Jericho crashes out to the floor again. Another climb is cut off by some Jericho chair shots and another shove sends Benoit crashing out to the floor. Jericho finally pulls down the title at 18:45.

Rating: A. There are different ways to resent a ladder match and this one was designed around two guys beating the living daylights out of each other. That worked to a charm, as this was one of the most violent matches you will see without going totally over the top. It’s still an incredible match with two guys hurting each other for a long time with some nasty looking crashes and spots. Awesome match and well worth what should be another look.

Drew Carey meets Trish Stratus and hits on her a bit but Vince McMahon comes in. More pay per view plugging ensues until Vince puts him in the Royal Rumble. Carey is in.

Billy Gunn tries to talk Chyna (with her bad neck) out of a match but Chyna is having none of it.

Chris Jericho says he proved Chris Benoit wrong.

We recap the Women’s Title match, as Ivory (of Right To Censor) is not happy with Chyna, who is out for revenge after Right To Censor attacked her. Chyna has a bad neck coming in but just wants to wreck Ivory anyway.

Women’s Title: Chyna vs. Ivory

Chyna is challenging and jumps her to start, with Ivory being thrown down by the hair. The forearms in the corner have Ivory down and a heck of a right hand knocks her off the top. The beating goes into the crowd before Chyna takes her back inside. Hold on though as Chyna has to beat up Steven Richards as well before hitting a handspring elbow….and down she goes. Ivory crawls over and gets the pin at 3:32.

Rating: C. This was more an extended angle than a match as the whole point was Chyna getting hurt again. Ivory didn’t get in a single shot, save for maybe some ineffective punches, and then they did the angle to end it. There is only so much you can do with Chyna in the women’s division and that was on display here, as Chyna was a wrecking ball against the champion.

Post match Chyna is stretchered out.

Stephanie McMahon runs into Trish Stratus in the hair and makeup room and things get catty over their relationships.

Drew Carey is given some gear and runs into Kane. He’s not impressed.

Low Down (egads) is told their Royal Rumble spot is being given to Drew Carey.

Fans at WWF New York give their picks for HHH vs. Kurt Angle.

We recap HHH challenging Kurt Angle for the WWF Title. HHH wants the title but there is still the whole Kurt Loves Stephanie deal, though that peaked a few months back. Since Kurt can’t have a McMahon with him, he’s settling for Trish Stratus, which has Stephanie furious (Trish having an affair with Vince McMahon doesn’t help).

WWF Title: Kurt Angle vs. HHH

Angle, with Trish Stratus (equaled out by Stephanie McMahon), is defending. HHH cranks on the arm to start before hitting a running shoulder. Back up and Angle hiptosses him down so we need a breather on the floor. That doesn’t last long as HHH is back in with some rather hard right hands. Angle goes to the arm as well and cranks away as this is starting a big more slowly than I would have expected.

Some suplexes have HHH in more trouble but they go back outside for some whips into the barricade (that’s more like it). Back in and HHH drop toeholds him down, setting up the Indian deathlock. With that broken up, Angle enziguris his way to freedom as Lawler talks about Andy Kaufman. HHH kicks away at the leg in the corner and wraps it around the post, with a Stephanie distraction allowing HHH to get in a chair shot.

Back in and some chop blocks have Angle in even more trouble, setting up the full on Indian Deathlock. With that broken up, HHH switches to the Figure Four to stay on the knee. Trish tries to interfere so the catfight with Stephanie is on. They go over the announcers’ table and can’t be separated, even by Vince McMahon. Vince finally picks Trish up and carries her off but Stephanie breaks that up as well.

With the three of them gone, HHH goes back to the bad knee as the match remembers it is happening. Angle kicks HHH away and into the post, setting up a DDT for two. A German suplex gives Angle two more so he heads up, only to get kind of Razor’s Edged down for three straight near falls. Back up and Angle runs him over, setting up the moonsault (which connects) for two.

The referee gets bumped so they go outside, with Angle being sent into the post. Back in and HHH goes up for some reason, allowing Angle to run the ropes for a super armdrag. There’s no referee so the fight heads back outside, this time with HHH sending Angle into the referee into the steps. Back in and Angle counters a belt shot into a belly to belly but HHH grabs the Pedigree. Cue Steve Austin (HHH recently cost him the title) to jump HHH though, including a belt shot to the face and the Stunner to give Angle the retaining pin at 24:21.

Rating: B-. It’s a good brawl and they worked well together but my goodness there was a lot going on here, with the match needing to be about five minutes shorter. Austin costing HHH the title doesn’t so much hurt Angle, who already feels like he is playing with the house’s money, but rather keeps the title on someone who is showing he can hang at this level. Good stuff here, but cut it down a few minutes and it’s a better match.

The Rock talks about how this is the biggest Royal Rumble of all time and says it doesn’t matter if the Undertaker and Kane are together. After referencing nipple tickling, Rock says it could come down to himself and Bull Buchanan, Perry Saturn, or even….Steve Austin. Either way, he’s going to Wrestlemania. Why his music plays after a promo isn’t clear.

Video on the Royal Ruble, with a look at most of the people involved.

Royal Rumble

Two minute intervals and it’s Jeff Hardy in at #1 and Bull Buchanan in at #2. Buchanan starts fast and slugs away but can’t press slam Jeff out. Instead Jeff puts him on top but can’t get him out either, putting them at about even so far. Choking on the ropes ensues until Matt Hardy is in at #3, because tag teams have a tendency to start the Rumble together. A double clothesline quickly gets rid of Buchanan so the Hardys bump fists and then go with some grappling. Matt can’t get rid of Jeff but Jeff can’t get rid of Matt until Faarooq is in at #4.

The Hardys are dropped with a double clothesline and Jeff is sent to the apron, where he cuts off the Dominator to Matt. The Twist of Fate into the Swanton is enough to get rid of Faarooq and it’s time for the Hardys to fight again. Naturally this means the shirts come off (yes, the women in the audience approve) before they can slug it out. Jeff nails a Whisper in the Wind and it’s Drew Carey in at #5.

The Hardys keep fighting and go to the corner, while Carey slowly gets inside. Matt and Jeff eliminate each other, leaving commentary to realize that Carey is currently the last man standing. Then Kane is in at #6 (JR: “Oh my God oh my God oh my God.”) and Carey immediately starts asking for the Hardys to get back in. Kane slowly walks around the ring to kill some time, allowing Carey time to offer him some money. That doesn’t work either as Kane grabs him by the throat, only to have Raven come in at #7 for the save, allowing Carey to wisely eliminate himself.

Raven gets knocked outside (not eliminated) where he manages a fire extinguisher shot to Kane. Cue Al Snow in at #8 (coming in before the clock even starts) to jump Raven, but then the clock counts down for him anyway. A bunch of weapons are thrown in, including Snow’s trusty bowling ball. Said ball is rolled between Raven’s legs before he and Snow start trash canning Kane. The drop toehold into the trashcan puts Kane down and it’s Perry Saturn in at #9.

Saturn gets….well not that smart actually by going after Kane’s knee. Kane gorilla presses Saturn but onto the mat for no logical reason. Everyone combines to go after Kane and finally get him down, which still doesn’t seem that bright. Steve Blackman is in at #10, giving us a group of Kane, Raven, Snow, Saturn and Blackman. With everyone else brawling, Blackman brings out his sticks to beat up everyone but Kane as the lack of brightness continues. Grandmaster Sexay is in at #11 but Kane has had this and quickly clears the ring.

Honky Tonk Man of all people is in at #12 and tells Kane to give him a minute. We start the song, until Kane grabs the guitar and smashes it over Honky Tonk Man’s head. That’s enough for the easy elimination and Kane is left alone….but the Rock is in at #13 to make things a lot more interesting. Rock hammers away and hits the running clothesline but Kane hits him in the face. Rock’s right hands are cut off by a big boot and Goodfather is in at #14.

That lasts all of three seconds before Rock punches Goodfather out, leaving Kane to hit a suplex. The side slam plants Rock and Tazz is in at #15, only to be tossed out in less than ten seconds. Rock gets in a Samoan drop and it’s Bradshaw in at #16. Bradshaw gets to hammer on both of them until Kane hits a double clothesline. Albert is in at #17, sending Lawler into a need for updates on Trish Stratus and Stephanie McMahon. Even Lawler can tell that JR is ignoring him as JBL saves Rock from Albert for no logical reason.

Hardcore Holly is in at #18 as Albert chokebombs Bradshaw. Holly and Bradshaw team up but can’t get rid of the Rock (the fans were interested though), leaving Alberto to drop Kane with a single boot to the face. K-Kwik (R-Truth) is in at #19 and my goodness it’s weird to hear him called a rookie. Albert still can’t get rid of Albert as Val Venis is in at #20. That gives us Kane, Rock, Bradshaw, Albert, Holly, Kwik and Venis, with Kane spinebustering Venis out of the corner. Brawling on the ropes ensues until William Regal is in at #21.

Venis can’t get rid of the Rock, but the tease of an elimination again brings quite the strong reaction. Test is in at #22 and gets rid of Regal without much trouble (and would take the European Title from him the next night on Raw) before going after Albert. With more brawling against the ropes not doing much, Big Show makes a surprise return at #23 and cleans house, getting rid of Test and Kwik before chokeslamming everyone but Rock.

Instead Rock kicks him low, hits some right hands, and clotheslines Show out. Show looked awesome there for about a minute and a half but then he was out. Hold on though as Show clears off the announcers’ table and pulls Rock to the floor for a chokeslam through said table. Crash Holly is in at #24 as a bunch of people can’t get rid of Kane. Undertaker is in at #25 and he quickly saves Kane from the big mob.

Everyone but Kane and Undertaker (and Rock on the floor) are quickly eliminated, leaving the monsters to stare at each other as JR is BEGGING them to fight each other. JR: “It started with brother vs. brother with the Hardys”. No JR, it didn’t. They stare at each other until Scotty 2 Hotty is in at #26 and, after waiting to get in, is quickly eliminated. Steve Austin is in at #27….or he would be as HHH jumps him from behind to even things up from earlier.

Rock gets back in to go after Kane but gets jumped by Undertaker. The bloody Austin is left laying in the aisle as Billy Gunn is in at #28 and goes after Undertaker and Kane to save Rock. Undertaker plants Rock as HHH finally leaves and it’s Haku (the reigning WCW Hardcore Champion but without a WCW contract) in at #29. Undertaker and Kane can only do so much with him as JR and Lawler get into a shouting match over whether Austin deserved to get jumped or not.

Rikishi is in at #30, giving us a final group of Kane, Rock, Undertaker, Austin (on the floor), Gunn, Haku and Rikishi, which is quite the up and down levels of main event talent. Austin manages to get up and starts wrecking people, including stomping Gunn down in the corner. Austin gets rid of Haku and Undertaker sends Rock to the apron. Rock saves himself, leaving Undertaker to hurt his own head while headbutting Rikishi.

A superkick actually puts Undertaker out but Rikishi takes too long loading up the Banzai Drop, allowing Rock to eliminate him (as you can hear Undertaker leaving on the motorcycle). We’re down to Austin, Kane, Gunn and Rock, with Gunn hitting a Fameasser on Austin. Then Gunn is tossed and we’re down to three. Kane gets knocked down (not eliminated) and that leaves Austin vs. Rock, which has the fans WAY into things again. The Rock Bottom is blocked but Austin hits a Stunner and Thesz presses Kane.

Rock is back up and sends Kane through the ropes to the floor (not eliminated), meaning it’s another slugout with Austin. They go for the eliminations but Kane is back in to toss Rock. That leaves us with Austin vs. Kane, with a chokeslam putting Austin down. Austin manages a low blow and a chair is brought in, which can’t go well. The Stunner drops Kane and three straight chair shots into a clothesline are enough to give Austin the win at 1:01:57.

Rating: A-. There was a bit of a lull in the middle but Rock and Austin and Kane and others were all enough to make this work. What matters is keeping the fans interested and they had the Carey stuff, then the hardcore stuff, then the serious stuff got going with the Rock coming in to fight Kane. All of that was good, but it really cranked up when Austin came in. It’s not the best Rumble ever, but it’s pretty great with nothing close to bad.

Overall Rating: A. Yeah this is an all timer, with the only thing close to bad being a three and a half minute angle disguised as a match. Other than that you have good World and Tag Team Title matches, plus the amazing ladder match and a pretty incredible Royal Rumble. It’s a show that more than holds up and there is pretty much nothing on here worth really complaining about. Check this one out if you haven’t in a bit, as it’s still great.

 

Ratings Comparison

Dudley Boyz vs. Edge and Christian

Original: B-
2013 Redo: B
2018 Redo: B-
2024 Redo: B-

Chris Jericho vs. Chris Benoit

Original: A
2013 Redo: A+
2018 Redo: A
2024 Redo: A

Ivory vs. Chyna

Original: N/A
2013 Redo: D
2018 Redo: D-
2024 Redo: C

Kurt Angle vs. HHH

Original: B
2013 Redo: B
2018 Redo: B
2024 Redo: B-

Royal Rumble

Original: B
2013 Redo: B+
2018 Redo: A-
2024 Redo: A-

Overall Rating

Original: A
2013 Redo: A
2018 Redo: A
2024 Redo: A

Yep, we’re done with this one as it’s about as definitive as it can get.

 

 

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Royal Rumble Count-Up – 2000 (2022 Redo): It Still Has It

Royal Rumble 2000
Date: January 23, 2000
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 19,231
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross

This is the first of the two redos of the year and you picked a good one. What we have here is one of the better one two punches in WWF history, as it’s a double main event. Of course there is the Rumble, but we also have Cactus Jack vs. HHH for the WWF Title in a street fight, which should work out fairly well. Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at some of Cactus Jack’s most violent moments over the years, with HHH still thinking he knows what he is getting into. Some of the Japanese deathmatch stuff here is rather insane looking and wasn’t something you would see on WWF (or American) TV at the time (or in modern times either really).

The set is really cool, as it has the entrance opposite the hard camera. There is a taxi hanging over the aisle, which is painted like a street for the street fight. Remember when they put in actual effort for those things?

Kurt Angle vs. ???

Angle has only been around for about a month and a half so he still has his ridiculously over the top confidence. He’s also still a bonehead, so this could get ugly in a hurry. Angle mocks the New York Knicks for not being able to win a title and offer to be New York’s Champion tonight. As for his special opponent tonight, Angle knows he must be worried so come out here and give it your all.

Kurt Angle vs. Tazz

This is Tazz’s debut, though the WE WANT TAZZ chants during Angle’s speech might have given something away. Tazz slugs away at the bell and sends Angle over the top to take the fight to the floor. There’s the ECW chant, which must be over Angle’s one night ECW appearance. Angle gets in a suplex in the aisle and takes him back inside for a running shoulder.

There’s an overhead belly to belly from Angle but Tazz crotches him on top. The super Tazzplex gets two as Angle gets a foot on the rope. A bridging German suplex gives Angle two but the Angle Slam is countered into an overhead German suplex. More suplexes set up the Tazmission and Angle is out at 3:15.

Rating: C+. This is one of the more memorable debuts and opening matches in company history, as Tazz made an immediate impact and handed Angle his first defeat. I didn’t know anything about ECW but a buddy of mine who watched it had hyped up Tazz for months. This made the whole thing worth it, as Tazz looked like a killer and massacred Angle without much trouble. Of note: Angle was still new at this kind of wrestling and asked what he should do if Tazz, with his shooter gimmick, tried to test Angle on the mat. Some WWF official replied with a simple: “You’re a gold medalist. I don’t think that will be a problem.”

Post match Angle is out and has to do a stretcher job. Just in case Tazz wasn’t impressive enough.

The Hardys, with manager Terri Runnels (that didn’t last long), are ready to fight these newcomers the Dudleys in something called a tag team tables match. They aren’t letting Terri out there with them though as it’s going to be dangerous.

Dudley Boyz vs. Hardy Boyz

Tables match, with both members having to go through a table to win. Before the match, Bubba Ray, still stuttering, can’t believe New Yorkers cheer for those pretty boy Hardys but they boo his new hero, JOHN ROCKER (who gave a SCATHING interview about New York around this time). It’s a brawl in the aisle to start with the Dudleys getting the better of things and grabbing the first table.

That takes a bit too long though, allowing Jeff to break it up and hit a big dive over the top onto Bubba. Matt and D-Von try to put the other through a table inside as Jeff CRACKS Bubba in the head with at able. Jeff gets a running start on the barricade but Bubba throws a table at his head for a great looking crash. Back in and the Hardys load up a double superplex through a table but D-Von moves the table just in time.

With that not working, let’s bring in a ladder, because that couldn’t go badly. A running shot with the ladder sends Bubba outside (though the ladder hits the ground first), followed by another hard chair shot to his head. Bubba is laid on a table so the Hardys can dive (Jeff off the top, Matt off a ladder) for the first….uh, table breaking. There’s a chair to D-Von’s head and the Hardys set up the steps to bridge a table off the apron. Matt’s top rope legdrop only hits table though and Jeff’s dive goes through another table, leaving the Hardys laying.

Neither count as those weren’t offensive moves so let’s throw some steps inside. A table is bridged over said steps and a superbomb sends Matt through it, evening us up at one table each. Everyone heads outside again and the Dudleys set up four tables underneath a balcony opposite the entrance.

Matt is piled on top but Jeff is back with chair shots to break it up. Bubba is fine enough to take Jeff into the crowd and onto the balcony, where Jeff BLASTS HIM with some chair shots, sending him through the tables in the big crash. Matt puts D-Von on another table and the big Swanton through D-Von gives the Hardys the win at 10:17.

Rating: B. This was the kind of hard hitting fight that you would expect from these two as they beat the living daylights out of each other. They were trying to get noticed and it worked very well, with this being not only violent but memorably violent, with that chair to Jeff’s head and the finish being great.

Kurt Angle gets checked out by medics and despite barely being able to stand, he insists he’s still undefeated because a choke is illegal.

And now, the Miss Royal Rumble Swimsuit contest. Our judges are Sgt. Slaughter, Tony Garea, Fabulous Moolah, Johnny V (he’s lost his Luscious) and Freddie Blassie, with Jerry Lawler as Master of Ceremonies. Here are the contestants: Ivory, Terri, Jacqueline, BB (she wasn’t around long), Luna Vachon and the Kat (Women’s Champion, and the reason this is happening, due to showing quite a bit at Armageddon). Hang on though as Andy Richter, from Late Night With Conan O’Brien, is a bonus guest judge.

Ivory reluctantly disrobes, followed by the rest of them willingly doing so (save for Luna, whose robe doesn’t exactly cover her in the first place). The Kat is about to win (as hers is made of bubble wrap) but here is Mae Young to enter as well, including taking off her top (with various censoring included). Mark Henry comes out for the save. The older judges give it to Young and Lawler loses his mind. This was the advertised nudity on the show, as the WWF gets to mess with its fans a bit, never to do this again.

We go to WWF New York (The “site based entertainment complex, because they made things sound boring back then too.) where the Coach (he’s new) thinks the fans are excited.

Chris Jericho and Chyna, the co-Intercontinental Champions, argue over who gets to wear the belt to the ring. Earl Hebner comes in to take the belt away, saying we can settle this out there. Jericho: “Earl come on. Dave?”

Don’t try this at home.

Intercontinental Title: Chris Jericho vs. Chyna vs. Hardcore Holly

Only Holly is challenging in a weird situation. Jericho is of course way over in New York and promises that his Jericholics will throw a victory party that will make the Millennium Bash look like his sister’s seventh birthday party. Holly shoves Chyna down to start and hammers on Jericho, earning him alternating slaps from the champs. Chyna gets whipped over the corner and out to the floor as Lawler talks about the horrors he just saw. Ross: “You’ve seen scary movies, like Man On The Moon?”

With Chyna on the floor, Jericho tries for the Walls on Holly but Chyna comes in for the save (which is not well received). Holly get sent outside for a change, with Chyna hitting a baseball slide. Jericho adds a big dive to the floor but mostly crashes, allowing Chyna to hit her DDT back inside.

Holly throws her outside again but she low bridges Jericho outside as well (maybe not on purpose). With nothing else working, Holly grabs a chair, sending JR into a panic. Chyna dropkicks it into his face anyway, setting up a double cover for two on Holly back inside. A low blow sends Jericho outside, leaving Chyna to Pedigree Holly for two.

Holly loads Chyna up in an electric chair, allowing Jericho to hit a Doomsday crossbody for two, with the kickout feeling a bit like a surprise. Chyna breaks up a superplex attempt on Holly and then does it herself, only to get small packaged for two. Jericho comes back in, allowing Chyna to chair Holly down. Since stealing moves is a thing, Chyna tries the Walls on Holly but gets caught with the bulldog. The Lionsault finishes Chyna to give Jericho the undisputed title at 7:31.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t exactly great and Holly didn’t exactly feel like a threat to win the title. Thankfully they didn’t bother trying to do anything crazy like keeping up the double champions thing. Jericho was a bigger star and there was no reason to leave him there with Chyna when there were other, better stars for him to face. The match itself was a little clunky and felt like it was ready to wrap up about two minutes earlier, which is never a good thing.

The Rock thinks he can win the Royal Rumble, but he’ll have to find a way around Crash Holly and Headbanger Mosh. Of course he isn’t worried about Big Show and Michael Cole can have a tall glass of Shut Up Juice (that never got over). Rock is going to prove he is the great one and go to Wrestlemania, if you catchphrase.

We recap the New Age Outlaws vs. the Acolytes. The Outlaws are the loudmouthed champions and the Acolytes are ready to destroy them (again).

Tag Team Titles: Acolytes vs. New Age Outlaws

The Outlaws are defending and get in their signature entrance. The Acolytes start fast and hammer away until we settle down to Faarooq powerslamming Dogg. Gunn breaks up the Dominator, allowing Dogg to hit the shaky punches. Bradshaw isn’t having the shaky knee drop though (Dogg liked to shake) so Gunn comes in and misses a Stinger Splash.

The Clothesline From Bradshaw gets no cover so Faarooq comes back in for the spinebuster. Gunn pulls the referee out though and here is X-Pac to kick Bradshaw in the face. Faarooq takes care of him but Gunn hits the Fameasser on Bradshaw to retain at 2:30. I’ve always thought that was rushed as these guys could go seven or eight minutes without much trouble.

We recap Cactus Jack vs. HHH for the WWF Title. HHH cheated to get the title back from Big Show earlier this month but now it is time to defend against the person he took it from in the first place. Mankind had been complaining about the McMahon-Helmsley Era so he was beaten down and fired. The Rock hinted at a mass walk out and got the firing overturned, but it was time for Mankind to face HHH in a street fight at the Royal Rumble. Another beatdown showed Mankind that he wasn’t ready for that….but he knew someone who was.

That meant the return of Cactus Jack, which was more or less the same way Jack debuted in the WWF back in 1997. It was even setting up a Falls Count Anywhere match on the September 4 Monday night Raw in Madison Square Garden, where Jack beat HHH in a classic. HHH knows what he is in for here and the odds are entirely in Jack’s favor. It’s his match against a man he has beaten before in his own backyard. HHH is in trouble and he knows it, so it’s time to fight.

WWF Title: HHH vs. Cactus Jack

HHH is defending and this is a street fight. As usual, I can’t believe how good My Time was as a theme song. Even the ever confident Stephanie McMahon kisses HHH goodbye and bails because this is going to be violent. The slugout gets things going with HHH hammering in the corner and then realizing that’s not the best idea. Cactus (or Mankind according to JR) shows him how it’s done and they head outside for a swinging neckbreaker on the floor.

Back up and HHH manages a bell shot to the face, which just seems to wake Jack up. HHH brings a chair inside and tells Jack to bring it…which Jack does, charging straight into a chair to the head. Jack is right back up with a clothesline, because it was just one chair shot. The chair is placed over HHH’s face and a middle rope leg gives Jack two. They go back to the floor with HHH sending him into the barricade, only to get backdropped over said barricade.

Naturally Jack is fine with taking the fight out there (past a guy in a chef’s outfit) until they wind up in the aisle under the taxi. Jack loads up some wooden pallets, with a suplex dropping HHH onto them. There’s a good trashcan shot to HHH’s head and some whips send him into the metal doors. They’re doing a great job of having HHH get beaten up because the stuff in the streets is so far out of his element.

HHH manages a suplex onto a trashcan (because he can get out of trouble with wrestling) but Jack sends him into the steps. The running knee drives HHH’s head into the steps…and let’s get a barbed wire 2×4. HHH manages to take it away and hits Jack in the ribs and back a few times, with the wire starting to come off the top. Jack comes back with a low blow and a belly to back suplex as the referee hands the 2×4 to the Spanish commentator.

Back in and Jack’s suplex gets a VERY delayed two so he heads outside to get the 2×4 again. Ignore that it isn’t where the commentator put it and clearly not the same one as the wire on this one is tightly wrapped again, but it’s the best way to swap out the real one for the fake one. The referee gets bumped and there’s the 2×4 to HHH’s face to bust him open. Another shot to the face gets a delayed two and HHH’s calf is busted as well.

There’s a third head shot, followed by a famous shot of Jack ripping the wire over HHH’s face. They head over to the announcers’ table (HHH’s face is COVERED in blood) where HHH reverses a piledriver into a backdrop to send Jack somewhat through the table. Back in and the Pedigree is countered into a catapult into the post and a faceplant into the barbed wire gives Jack two more. There’s the Cactus Clothesline but HHH is able to hiptoss him legs first into the steps. HHH sends him knees first into the steps again, just in case the first one didn’t take.

Back in and another chop block takes Jack down again and let’s pick up the barbed wire to crack the knee. With nothing else working, HHH pulls out some handcuffs but Jack manages to wrap them around his hand to hit HHH in the head. HHH goes right back to the knee though and Jack’s hands are cuffed behind him, just like last year against the Rock. The steps are brought in but Jack drop toeholds HHH face first into them.

A low blow lets Jack bite his face, but HHH is right back with another shot to the face. Back up and HHH chairs him so hard that the chair breaks and they go up the aisle. There’s a chair shot to the head but Jack tells him to do it again. Cue the Rock with a heck of a chair shot of his own to HHH though and a cop unhooks Jack to even things up (because wrestling is weird about equal levels of punishment).

They head back to ringside, where a piledriver onto (not through) the table, as in how Jack beat HHH in 1997, knocks HHH silly. Jack sends him back inside and let’s have some thumbtacks. Stephanie comes back to try and stop it but HHH is fine enough to hit a backdrop onto the tacks for the nasty looking crash. The Pedigree connects….for two, and the collective gasp at the kickout is still great. Another Pedigree onto the tacks FINALLY puts Jack away to retain the title at 26:50.

Rating: A+. If the scale went higher than this, it would do so here, because this is one of the best matches of all time. These two massacred each other, with HHH surviving instead of winning. This was brutal, violent, and a rollercoaster of emotions, as there were times where you could believe Jack could pull off the impossible.

What made this work was they laid in the violence from the bell and it felt like they hated each other. This was HHH’s official graduation to the next level, as he now had his own instant classic that showed he really could fight at this level instead of just escaping. At the very least, he can now beat Jack in this situation, which he couldn’t do two and a half years earlier. Incredible match that absolutely holds up and it is worth about five viewings. I can’t recommend this one enough as it really is an all time masterpiece.

Post match HHH is taken out on a stretcher so Jack beats him up again, including another barbed wire shot, because we need to do this again (indeed we do).

Commentary raves about the match and for once, it is completely deserved.

Back at WWF New York, Linda McMahon promises to deal with HHH the McMahon Way. She could always let him date and then marry Stephanie for real.

Royal Rumble

90 second intervals and the Fink makes it very clear that BOTH FEET must touch, which sends us into a clip of Shawn Michaels’ miracle finish in 1995. D’Lo Brown is in at #1 and Grandmaster Sexay is in at #2, which anyone knows if they have played No Mercy. Brown hammers away and hits the leg lariat before nearly dropping Grandmaster on his head in a Liger Bomb attempt. Instead Grandmaster escapes with a hurricanrana as commentary talks about the street fight.

Mosh is in at #3 (complete with green cones sticking off of his chest for his costume of choice) to go after Brown but cue Kaientai to invade over not being entered. The two of them are beaten down in a hurry so Brown suplexes Grandmaster. Christian (with the AWESOME Blood Brother solo theme) is in at #4 with the reverse layout DDT to Mosh. The four pair off, with Christian charging into Grandmaster’s superkick.

It’s Rikishi in at #5 and there is a good chance he’ll get rid of someone. There goes Mosh and Christian follows him rather quickly but Brown hits a running neckbreaker on Rikishi. That keeps Rikishi down for all of two seconds and the always awesome Rikishi Driver knocks Brown silly. Brown is out, leaving Rikishi and Grandmaster, the latter of whom backs out in a wise bit of fear.

Scotty 2 Hotty is in at #6 though….and the sunglasses come out. The big dance sequence is on, with the crowd seeming to eat it up. Scotty busts out the Worm but Rikishi knocks them both out. Everything is cool because it’s all about the title, so Rikishi dances some more on his own. That’s an all time sequence and one of the most memorable Royal Rumble moments.

Steve Blackman is in at #7 and gets in a few shots on Rikishi before being tossed out in less than a minute. Viscera is in at #8 to pound on Rikishi and hit a belly to belly suplex. A running splash in the corner crushed Rikishi but he avoids a second, setting up a bunch of superkicks to get rid of Viscera. Big Boss Man is in at #9 and takes his sweet time getting in, because he actually pays attention. He stays on the floor until Test is in at #10 and jumps Boss Man on the outside. They all get in, where Boss Man low blows Test as he chokes Rikishi in the corner.

British Bulldog is in at #11 and they pair off again, with Test kicking Boss Man in the face. Bulldog low blows Rikishi to break up the Banzai Drop but can’t toss him out. Instead it’s Gangrel in at #12 but here is Kaientai again, earning themselves another fast ejection (including Taka Michinoku being flipped forward, sending his face into the floor). That takes up so much time that it’s Edge in at #13 to go after Gangrel. The Banzai Drop crushes Boss Man as Lawler wants to see Taka (“That Chinese guy.”) get tossed out again.

Bob Backlund is in at #14 to a huge reaction but gets caught in the wrong corner. He’s fine enough to avoid Rikishi’s charge though and everyone gets together to toss Rikishi. Bulldog headbutts Backlund a few times and it’s Chris Jericho in at #15 to toss Backlund. That’s fine with Bob, who goes into the crowd to continue campaigning for Congress (seriously, he was a different kind of guy). Crash Holly is in at #16 and everyone pairs off again as things slow way down.

Chyna is in at #17 and goes after Jericho, who sends her to the apron. That’s fine with Chyna, who manages to toss him out, only to be eliminated by Boss Man. Faarooq is in at #18 but here is the Mean Street Posse right behind him. The distraction/beatdown lets Boss Man toss him as well as they aren’t letting the ring get overly full. Road Dogg is in at #19 and goes after Test, who hits him low to cut that off in a hurry. Somehow Crash stomps Boss Man in the corner as Al Snow is in at #20, giving us Boss Man, Test, Bulldog, Gangrel, Edge, Crash, Dogg and Snow.

Road Dogg tosses Bulldog, allowing Lawler to make doggy style jokes. Val Venis is in at #21 but we need to pause for Funaki to run in again, earning a third toss to the floor. Prince Albert is in at #22 as Edge is tossed out. Lawler talks about Albert and Mae Young having/potentially having various piercings to fill in time as everyone is weakly fighting near the ropes. Hardcore Holly is in at #23 and a grand total of nothing is happening. This match really needs someone to come in and clean house….and the Rock is in at #24.

Boss Man is out but a bunch of people hammer Rock in the corner to slow him right back down. Billy Gunn is in at #25 and he gets to beat Rock down as well. Rock breaks that up and tosses Crash as Road Dogg is still holding onto the bottom rope, as he has done multiple times tonight. Big Show, who has not been happy with Rock as of late, is in at #26 and NOW we should be going somewhere. Rock is on him before he even gets his other leg over the top but Show knocks him away without much trouble. Test and Gangrel are out in a hurry and a gorilla press drops Holly (on the mat, with Lawler not getting the logic).

Bradshaw is in at #27 but the Mean Street Posse comes in again, allowing the Outlaws to dump Bradshaw out. Faarooq comes back out to beat up the Posse in the aisle and things slow down again. Kane is in at #28 and this has to be the real house cleaning right? Venis is tossed but Rock cuts Kane off to slow things right back down. The Godfather, with ladies, is in at #29 as Kane tosses Albert.

Funaki comes in again and Snow tosses him out even faster this time (yeah it was repetitive but this was a hilarious gag). Godfather finally gets in and it’s X-Pac completing the field, giving us a final group of Road Dogg, Al Snow, Holly, Rock, Gunn, Show, Kane, Godfather and X-Pac. Holly is out in a hurry and Show gets rid of Godfather. Rock tosses Snow and Gunn dumps Dogg, only to get tossed by Kane.

We’re down to Rock, Kane, Show and X-Pac, with Rock tossing X-Pac as Kane fight with the Outlaws in the aisle. X-Pac comes back in because no one saw him go out and it’s Kane kicking Rock in the face. Kane and Show fight over a chokeslam until Kane hits an enziguri of all things. A slam puts Show down but X-Pac kicks Kane out.

The Bronco Buster hits Show, who tosses X-Pac out for his efforts. That leaves Rock vs. Show so let’s get right to the spinebuster and People’s Elbow. Rock can’t get him out though and Show is back with a chokeslam. Show takes his sweet time loading Rock up for the elimination though and Rock slips off his shoulder for the elimination and the win at 51:49.

Rating: B+. This is a match that was this close to being an all timer and it just doesn’t quite make it. The opening is good, with the Too Cool sequence being one of the most memorable Rumble moments ever, but then it goes into a pretty deep freeze until Rock comes in. You could tell that there weren’t a lot of big names in the middle to make it work but the great parts are awesome, with Kaientai being in there to make it better. It’s a very good Rumble, though not quite a classic.

Post match Rock says he’s going to Wrestlemania but Show comes back in and tosses him out. Rock yells a lot to end the show.

Overall Rating: A. The two main events eat up over half of the show and they are both classics, with the tables match being a great showcase as well. The only things close to bad on here is a totally watchable seven and a half minute Intercontinental Title match and a less than three minute tag match. Throw in Tazz’s awesome debut against Angle and the atmosphere of the whole thing and this is an incredible show which is well worth your time.

Ratings Comparison

Tazz vs. Kurt Angle

Original: A-
2012 Redo: C+
2022 Redo: C+

Hardy Boyz vs. Dudley Boyz

Original: A
2012 Redo: B+
2022 Redo: B

Chris Jericho vs. Chyna vs. Hardcore Holly

Original: C
2012 Redo: C+
2022 Redo: C-

New Age Outlaws vs. Acolytes

Original: N/A
2012 Redo: N/A
2022 Redo: N/A

HHH vs. Cactus Jack

Original: A+
2012 Redo: A+
2022 Redo: A+

Royal Rumble

Original: A-
2012 Redo: A
2022 Redo: B+

Overall Rating

Original: A
2012 Redo: A
2022 Redo: A

Those two matches carry everything here and that makes for a classic.

 

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Survivor Series Count-Up – 2000 (2019 Redo): He Did It For You

Survivor Series 2000
Date: November 19, 2000
Location: Ice Palace, Tampa, Florida
Attendance: 18,602
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s old school time and as luck would have it, we’re going with something from one of the best eras the company has ever had. Steve Austin is back from his neck surgery and going after the mastermind behind his attack with another match against HHH. At the same time, we have the Rock vs. Rikishi, who famously did it for da Rock. Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at HHH being the mastermind, which was the best thing they could have done after the big question mark of picking Rikishi. See, back then they saw when something wasn’t working and FIXED THEIR MISTAKE. I know that’s a foreign concept these days but it really did happen back in the day.

T&A/Trish Stratus vs. Steve Blackman/Crash Holly/Molly Holly

This is before Trish was a wrestler, Molly is still the wholesome Holly cousin and Blackman is Hardcore Champion. Blackman strikes away at Albert to start as JR actually recaps the story for this one, because this match actually has a backstory: the APA went on vacation and left Crash in charge of the office so T&A took over.

See how easy it can be to give what would be an otherwise ice cold match a backstory? And how weird it is for the faces to be in the bottom right hand corner of the ring? How did WWE even manage to have a designated face and heel corner in modern times? Crash’s high crossbody is pulled out of the air so Blackman dropkicks him in the back for a save. Trish comes in but kicks Albert low by mistake, allowing Crash to bring Molly in.

The chase gives us a double tag to Crash and Test with a hurricanrana giving Crash two. Test’s pumphandle slam is broken up as Crash rams him into Albert and it’s off to Molly to beat up Trish. Test pulls Molly down by the hair but she is fine enough to suplex Trish with ease. Crash has to save Molly from a gorilla press but Trish grabs the middle rope bulldog for two. Back up and Molly hits a middle rope sunset flip to put Trish away at 5:03 with Lawler losing his mind as she nearly falls out of her top.

Rating: C-. Today this would have been a Kickoff Show match but that doesn’t mean it was bad. Instead what we had was a match that didn’t overstay its welcome and had a fast enough pace that it still worked. Molly was the best choice for the pin and it’s not like Trish getting pinned is going to hurt her. The more I watch Molly the more impressed I am with her as she can do so many different things. Here she’s almost the All American girl and she would be doing her chaste stuff just over a year later before becoming kind of a hybrid. That takes talent, which she certainly has.

Kurt Angle comes up to Edge and Christian in the back but they have their own match tonight and can’t help Angle against Undertaker. Oh and Christian ate some bad chili and came down with mono. Angle: “You guys with your crazy antics.” He just wanted them to go out and celebrate, as long as he can find non-alcoholic beer.

Earlier today, Low Down and Tiger Ali Singh weren’t on the security entry list. This really shouldn’t come as a surprise.

Radicalz vs. Billy Gunn/Chyna/K-Kwik/Road Dogg

Survivor Series match and it’s so bizarre to see R-Truth here nineteen years ago in a different enough character. Gunn and Chyna may have a bit of romance going on but it isn’t clear. Terri is here with the Radicalz, Malenko is Light Heavyweight Champion and Eddie is Intercontinental Champion. Gunn hammers on Saturn to start and it’s Chyna coming in for a double suplex.

A powerslam gives Chyna two but the handspring elbow is countered into a waistlock. You don’t do that to Chyna, who kicks Saturn low, knocks Eddie off the apron and hits a DDT on Saturn. Everything breaks down and Eddie hits Chyna with the Intercontinental Title for the pin at 2:33.

That takes away a lot of the fans’ interest in the match, even as Dogg gets beaten up for a change. Eddie starts in on the knee so it’s time to talk about the World Title match instead of what’s going on here. Dogg catches Eddie on top with a superplex, allowing the tag off to Gunn. The tilt-a-whirl slam and sleeper drop get rid of Eddie at 6:01 to even things up as WWE keeps trying to make the Gunn singles push a thing.

Malenko and Kwik come in with the latter flipping around but getting driven into the corner for a tag to Benoit. A headscissors takes Benoit down but it’s a heck of a bridging German suplex to get rid of Kwik at 7:19. Dogg comes in and gets beaten up in the corner as well as Lawler tries to figure out why JR is talking about an accordion. Malenko gets two off a suplex but Dogg hits Saturn in the head to get a breather.

Saturn is right back with the northern lights suplex to get rid of Dogg, leaving us with Saturn/Benoit/Malenko vs. Gunn. The Radicalz waste no time in beating Gunn down in the corner and a cheap shot from Saturn makes it even worse. Saturn misses a superkick on the floor and hits Benoit by mistake (or he got close at least with a camera cut making the save), leaving Malenko to take the Fameasser for the pin at 10:58.

The Jackhammer gets two on Saturn but Benoit slams Gunn down and drops the Swan Dive for his own two. Gunn fights back with an elbow to the face and Benoit gets knocked to the apron. That means a suplex back inside but Saturn pulls the leg and holds it down to give Benoit the pin at 12:41.

Rating: D+. Pretty uninspired match here but the Radicalz winning was the only way to go. The team had been around for a long time now and it would be ridiculous to have them lose to the remnants of DX. The match wasn’t even any good with the Radicalz easily picking the team apart, mainly because it was the former Outlaws, Chyna and R-Truth.

Rock wouldn’t talk to Lilian Garcia as he arrived.

Chris Jericho thought is issues with Kane started over some spilled coffee but it is more complicated than that. It is about a man who looks in the mirror and sees the evil monster inside. Jericho is talking about himself though and he’s ready to prove that to Kane.

We recap Kane vs. Jericho, the latter of whom spilled coffee on Kane and made a reference to burning. Kane wasn’t happy and started torturing Jericho, including throwing him through a window and chokeslamming him onto the announcers’ table.

Kane vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho has a bad back coming in from the attacks. They slug it out to start with Kane getting the better of it as the Y2J chants start up. The dropkick puts Kane on the floor and the dive barely connects as Jericho’s foot gets caught on the rope. The springboard dropkick knocks Kane back to the floor as it’s a lot of getting in the shots that he can so far. Back in and Kane drops him face first onto the mat as we hit the monster stretch.

A belly to back suplex is countered and Jericho hammers away, only to get his head clotheslined off. Jericho gets choked over Kane’s back and the announcers continue to do a good job of selling the David vs. Goliath aspect here. A turnbuckle pad comes off and Kane goes to send Jericho face first into the steel (because Jericho is handsome and Kane hates anyone who isn’t a freak) but a raised foot is enough for the block. Instead Kane sends him to the floor and into various things, which is what monsters tend to do.

Back in and Jericho crotches him on top, gets shoved down, but still manages to dropkick Kane out of the air. A basement dropkick sets up a missile dropkick for two and the Walls go on. The rope is grabbed after a long stretch that didn’t have a lot of drama, mainly because Jericho was barely cranking on the thing. Jericho pulls him back and tries again but gets kicked in the face this time. The bulldog into the Lionsault (with Kane having to scoot over about a foot and a half) is blocked with a grab of the throat though and there’s the chokeslam for the pin at 12:35.

Rating: C. The ending would have been better had Kane not been so out of place at first but the rest wasn’t exactly great. For some reason I never got into this one and it just didn’t have that much drama. I do like Kane winning as it gives us a reason to keep things going, and this is the kind of thing that can go on for a bit.

Terri comes in to see the Radicalz and tells them that HHH is in the building and he’ll meet with them later. Laughter ensues.

European Title: William Regal vs. Hardcore Holly

Regal is defending in a match that was set up on Heat. Before the match, Regal mocks the Florida fans for not being able to elect a new President or understand something as basic as manners. Holly’s music cuts him off and I don’t think that counts as good manners either. Holly starts fast and hammers away but Regal goes with the wrestling by turning it into a lockup.

Regal pulls him chest first into the middle buckle and starts cranking on the arm, which had been broken earlier in the year and kept Holly on the shelf. Holly gets sent face first into the mat with a wristlock and Regal kneels down onto the arm again. A cross armbreaker keeps Holly in trouble until he manages a crossbody for a breather. Holly gets his arms tied in the ropes but manages to get free and knock Regal down. Sick of the wrestling thing, Holly grabs the title and hits Regal in the head for the DQ at 5:47.

Rating: D+. This felt like it was thrown in to fill time and odds are that is what they were doing. Holly got beaten up the entire time and then got disqualified in the end, which felt like more of a heel move than anything else. Just not very interesting of a match and it didn’t seem important either.

Trish comes in to see Angle and offers her, ahem, assistance tonight. He appreciates it but she can tell Test and Albert that he’s got Undertaker tonight. Kurt: “See you later!”

We recap the Rock vs. Rikishi. Last year, Rikishi ran over Steve Austin and accused Rock of telling him to do it. That wasn’t true though, with Rikishi saying that he did it for Rock because people like them weren’t going to get a shot in this company. Rock beat him up so Rikishi, with the help of real mastermind HHH, crushed Rock’s chest with a sledgehammer.

Rock vs. Rikishi

Rock has a bad chest coming in and charges in to hammer away. The Samoan drop (more like a backdrop) lets Rock grab a chair but the referee pulls it away, allowing Rikishi to superkick him down. Rock’s right hands don’t get him very far as Rikishi slams him right back down to take over again. Rikishi gets sent outside and his head goes into the steps….which shouldn’t hurt him.

It doesn’t seem to be that bad and Rikishi is back with a ram into the timekeeper’s bell. The ref gets bumped (of course) so it’s time to grab the sledgehammer. Since Rikishi is a bad villain (like, a really bad one), he takes so long that Rock can hit a Rock Bottom for a very delayed two. A headbutt to the chest puts Rock down and another one to the head has him rolling around in pain.

There’s another Samoa drop and Rikishi sits on his chest for two. Rikishi crushes him in the corner and gets in the Stinkface, which is the kind of embarrassment you don’t get from Rock too often. The hard clothesline turns Rikishi inside out and there’s a spinebuster, which only hurts the chest again. He’s fine enough to hit the People’s Elbow for the very delayed pin at 11:19.

Rating: C. Thank goodness, as having Rikishi beat the Rock would have been as ridiculous as having Rikishi be the big bad in a major storyline. This was as good as it was going to be and even then it was just a simple injury story. Rikishi is not believable in this spot and that is painfully obvious. At least he lost here, but it isn’t making this any less of a head scratcher.

Post match Rikishi superkicks him again and hits FOUR Banzai Drops. So yeah this is going to continue. Lucky us.

Raven is at WWF New York.

Steve Austin arrives. Dude it’s an hour and twenty minutes into the show. That’s bad even for you.

HHH and the Radicalz aren’t concerned so here’s Commissioner Mick Foley to say the Radicalz are banned from ringside and the match is now No DQ. HHH still doesn’t seem to mind.

Women’s Title: Ivory vs. Lita

Ivory, as part of the Right to Censor, is defending. Lita throws her down to start and the beatdown is on in a hurry. They get sloppy early on with Ivory shoving her away as Lawler talks about Lita’s underwear. Lita gets choked down in the corner as her eye is busted open BAD. More right hands keep Lita in trouble until she snaps off a headscissors for a breather.

Cue Steven Richards as Ivory is sent outside, meaning Lita gets to dive onto both of them. A high crossbody gets two on Ivory but Richards pulls her away from the Litasault. Somehow that isn’t a DQ, even with the referee looking right at her. The distraction lets Ivory grab the title but Lita suplexes her down. Now the Litasault hits the belt and Ivory retains at 4:56.

Rating: D+. They packed a lot into this one and that eye cut was nasty but it was a pretty weak effort, as was often the case around this era. The biggest problem is trying to put in so much stuff into a five minute match, as there is only so much you can cram into so little time before it stops working. That was the case here and it showed pretty badly.

Post match Lita is a bloody mess and has to be helped out.

Rock is pretty banged up.

Jericho jumps Kane in the back with a chair and drives him into a steel door. Various weapons are used until referees pull Jericho off.

We recap Kurt Angle vs. Undertaker for the WWF Title. Angle has been the greatest rookie in company history and Undertaker won a four way match to become #1 contender. Undertaker doesn’t think much of a nitwit like Angle, who isn’t laying down for anyone.

Undertaker talks about debuting here ten years ago and tonight, Angle takes his Last Ride.

WWF Title: Kurt Angle vs. Undertaker

Undertaker is challenging. Before the match, Angle talks about how this is his anniversary so the fans can vote on their favorite rookie year moment. Angle even lists them off until Undertaker’s entrance cuts him off for a tried and true idea. With Angle bailing, Undertaker holds up the title to get in Kurt’s head in a hurry. Undertaker grabs a chair so Angle hides behind the referee like a great coward.

That’s fine with Undertaker, who throws the chair to Angle….who uses it before the bell to take over early on. Angle stomps him down in the corner but you don’t do that to Undertaker, who switches places with him and hammers away. The big leg gets two and an elbow is good for the same, though the second one sees Undertaker pull him up. Old School connects as the fans are happy, though I can’t get around Undertaker’s near camouflage pants.

Angle snaps off the first suplex and Undertaker rolls to the floor, only to catch a diving Angle and drive him into the post. Back in and the big boot misses in the corner, which tends to be the case more often than not. The leg gets bent around the ropes as Angle is a lot more comfortable with the slower pace. Undertaker pulls him down into the Fujiwara armbar but cue Edge and Christian to distract the referee as Angle taps.

The distractions allow Angle to get up and take him back down by the leg, meaning it’s time to lay down and crank a bit. That’s broken up as well so Undertaker goes outside and beats up the Canadians, followed by a chokeslam for two on Angle. The champ is right back up and goes after the knee again, which does at least take Undertaker down for a bit. Angle grabs the Figure Four but gets it turned over for the break.

Undertaker gets two off a powerslam but Angle takes the leg again and Figure Fours it around the post for a bit. The leg is fine enough for Snake Eyes to get two and they’re both down again. A quick low blow (with the referee looking at them) doesn’t have much effect as Undertaker tries the Tombstone with Angle getting out to the apron. Angle tries to crawl underneath the ring but gets pulled back out for the Last Ride. That’s good for two….because the referee is counting the wrong man. That would be Kurt’s brother Eric, allowing Kurt to run back in and roll Undertaker up with tights for the pin at 16:03.

Rating: D+. I really wasn’t feeling this one as the leg stuff kept going but Undertaker kept getting back up without selling the thing. The ending was creative enough (or at least fresh) and that’s better than the selection of stupid finishes they could have used. Just not the best chemistry here and Undertaker never felt like he was in danger of taking a regular fall, which took away any drama they could have had.

Post match Kurt jumps in his car and gets out.

Video on the XFL cheerleaders. Like that’ll have any shelf life.

Edge and Christian/Right To Censor vs. Dudley Boyz/Hardy Boyz

Survivor Series again and Goodfather/Bull Buchanan, with Val Venis, are Tag Team Champions. Buchanan and Bubba start things off with nothing of note happening so it’s off to Goodfather to shoulder D-Von down instead. Everything breaks down in a hurry and it’s a quadruple DDT to plant the villains. The Hardys pull off their shirts to reveal Dudley camouflage but it takes too long, allowing Edge to hit the Edge O Matic to get rid of Matt at 3:58.

D-Von clotheslines Edge and Christian down but a Buchanan distraction sets up the Unprettier to get rid of D-Von at 5:08. Bubba comes in for a heck of a backdrop on Christian and it’s Jeff coming in. That goes better for Christian, who whips him ribs first into the post. Buchanan comes in and gets to stomp away, only to miss a charge so Bubba cane come back in and clean house.

Edge spears Buchanan by mistake and Bubba pins Bull at 7:32. The Bubba Bomb hits Edge and Christian splashes him by mistake to give Bubba another pin at 8:00. So it’s Bubba/Jeff vs. Christian/Goodfather in a bizarre tag match. The Death Valley Driver lets Goodfather get rid of Bubba at 8:42. Jeff is back up and takes Christian down for the Swanton and the pin at 9:34. Goodfather misses a splash in the corner though and Venis clotheslines him by mistake, allowing Jeff to steal the final pin at 10:05.

Rating: D. Oh this didn’t work as it needed about twice as long. They were flying through everything at once and nothing had a chance to make any kind of an impact. Jeff didn’t feel like he won as much as he was the only one they didn’t have time to eliminate. These eight are capable of WAY better but there is only so much that you can do in ten minutes with seven eliminations.

Post match the Right To Censor comes in to destroy Jeff but the Dudleys come in for the save. RTC is put through some tables for the big moment. They really needed to do this here instead of giving the match the extra time? I do miss Bubba’s trance for putting people through tables though.

HHH tells the Radicalz that they know what to do.

We recap HHH vs. Steve Austin. Rikishi ran Austin over last year but Austin came back and beat Rikishi up. Since it was Rikishi vs. Steve Austin, it was clear that someone had to be Rikishi’s boss, which of course was revealed as HHH. JR being stunned that the top heel in the company being the top heel in the story isn’t his best moment. Now it’s about revenge.

Steve Austin vs. HHH

No DQ and the Radicalz are banned from ringside. Austin goes straight to the slugging (as you may have guessed) and sends HHH head first into the buckle. A knee to the ribs sets up more shots to the face before Austin starts going after HHH’s bad back. The Thesz press and middle finger elbow send HHH outside as there is no point in trying for a cover yet. They fight up to the entrance with Austin picking up a piece scaffolding but getting punched back down.

The fight goes backstage for a bit before coming back to the entrance where Austin gets in a suplex. Back to ringside with both guys going into the steps and Austin stomps away at the timekeeper’s area. There’s a monitor shot to the head, followed by Austin picking up the cooler….but thinking twice about it because that’s what Austin does. Austin stomps away to leave a bloody HHH laying, meaning it’s time for a beer.

The empty can goes upside HHH’s busted head and it’s time to go inside again for a lot of punching. HHH’s low blow slows things down a bit and a neckbreaker takes him down. HHH crushes Austin’s head against the post and gets two off a clothesline. Austin grabs a spinebuster but misses the middle rope elbow. It’s back to the floor and a Pedigree attempt on the steps is countered with a backdrop through the announcers’ table.

Back in and the Stunner connects…for no cover. Instead Austin grabs the chair because it’s time for revenge. Austin gets a pretty disturbing smile on his face as he wraps the chair around HHH’s ankle. Hang on as let’s make it the neck instead, only to have HHH roll to the floor. They fight backstage again and here are the Radicalz to jump Austin with Eddie escorting HHH away.

Agents and referees try to break it up so Austin gets up and chases Benoit outside. HHH is out there as well but we’ve lost Austin so HHH is hiding in a car. Benoit goes off to find Austin and it’s HHH doing a near voiceover, saying we need to finish this. Cue Austin in a forklift to pick HHH’s car up and drop it down (HHH: “HOLY S***!”) to end the show. We’ll say the match ended at about 25:00.

Rating: B+. They did exactly what they should have done here and didn’t try to do anything else. This was all about violence and Austin getting some aggression out because HHH tried to kill him. Austin even had the big moment near the end with the Pillmanizing of the neck. This went well and outside of the ending with the car, it was a heck of a brawl with HHH not getting squashed, as he shouldn’t have.

Overall Rating: D+. The main event helped a lot but this just wasn’t a very good show. It was all about the one big match, Undertaker vs. Angle with a screwy finish and then the just ok Rock vs. Rikishi match. Things were in a weird place here with Austin and Rock now fighting over the top spot and it is clear that Rock took a step down at least for tonight. Rikishi being in one of the bigger matches on a major show is hardly a believable spot and this show just does not hold up, outside of the main event.

Ratings Comparison

Steve Blackman/Crash Holly/Molly Holly vs. T&A/Trish Stratus

Original: D+

2012 Redo: C-

2019 Redo: C-

The Radicalz vs. Team Chyna

Original: B-

2012 Redo: C

2019 Redo: D+

Kane vs. Chris Jericho

Original: B-

2012 Redo: C-

2019 Redo: C

William Regal vs. Hardcore Holly

Original: D-

2012 Redo: D-

2019 Redo: D+

The Rock vs. Rikishi

Original: B

2012 Redo: C+

2019 Redo: C

Ivory vs. Lita

Original: D+

2012 Redo: D

2019 Redo: D+

Kurt Angle vs. Undertaker

Original: B-

2012 Redo: C+

2019 Redo: D+

Team Dudley Boys vs. Team Edge and Christian

Original: C-

2012 Redo: C-

2019 Redo: D+

Steve Austin vs. HHH

Original: D-

2012 Redo: B-

2019 Redo: B+

Overall Rating:

Original: D+

2012 Redo: C-

2019 Redo: D+

Dang I’m all over the place with this one but yeah it’s not a great show by any stretch.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

https://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/07/24/survivor-series-2000-i-never-remember-this-show/

And the 2012 Redo:

https://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2015/11/07/survivor-series-count-up-2000-no-selling-a-car-crash/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Smackdown – October 7, 1999: Those Guys Again

Smackdown
Date: October 7, 1999
Location: Nassau Coliseum, Long Island, New York
Attendance: 12,133
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

We’re almost up to No Mercy and the card is starting to come together. The big story coming out of Raw is the British Bulldog being the most prominent heel in the company, which is quite the questionable move. Hopefully they find something a bit more interesting, though that might be asking too much. Let’s get to it.

Here is Raw if you need a recap.

Of note: during this taping, Droz was injured during his match against D’Lo Brown and would be paralyzed as a result, obviously never wrestling again. This was of course edited out of the broadcast, leaving the show a bit shorter than usual as they only had so much time to change anything.

We open with a tribute to Gorilla Monsoon, who passed away earlier this week. To say he was a huge factor behind the scenes in the company would be an incredible understatement.

Opening sequence.

X-Pac/Kane vs. Mideon/Viscera

X-Pac, still wanting to prove his worth, starts with Mideon as I question the value of fighting with Mideon in the first place. The flipping clothesline takes Mideon down and it’s off to Viscera, who misses a splash. Mideon comes back in and X-Pac fights back but won’t tag. Instead Kane tags him and dropkicks Viscera to the floor. The chokeslam finishes Mideon off at 2:41.

Post match the Acolytes run in and beat down X-Pac and Mideon.

The Rock is not impressed with the British Bulldog and mocks the sound of his bark. Right now though, the bigger issue is Val Venis running around with a Rocko sock in his tights. Tonight, Rock is playing director and showing Venis a movie about him taking a beating.

Post interview, Mankind thanks the Rock.

Post break, Mankind says he’s been thinking about sitting around and being a financial consultant, but instead, the Rock is fighting his battles for him. That’s what a friend does, so Mankind is going to fight the Rock’s battles when he faces the British Bulldog tonight. He’s going to take the microphone, turn it sideways and…and…hit him with it!

Hardcore Holly vs. Road Dogg

Their respective partners are here too. Dogg slugs away to start but gets knocked down, allowing Holly to kick him in the head. Some distractions on the floor don’t mean much and Holly grabs the chinlock to keep things slow. Dogg is sent outside for a beating from Crashs, naturally with the referee dealing with Billy Gunn. Holly goes up but dives into a raised boot, allowing the comeback to start. The shaky knee looks to set up the pumphandle slam but the seconds get in a brawl. That’s enough for Holly to grab the Falcon Arrow for the pin at 5:14.

Rating: D+. This was a good example of a match that made sense on paper as the story was there but the action was just dull. There was nothing here that made me want to see these teams fight, which is kind of the problem with the Outlaws in general. They could be entertaining, but then the bell rang and it doesn’t hold up very well.

Post match the brawl is on with the Outlaws cleaning house.

And now, sex therapy with Mark Henry. He hits on the therapist, then reveals that his first encounter was with his sister at 8 years old. And yes they still have, ahem, relations, as recently as a few days ago. Yep, this was about what you would expect.

Here is Jeff Jarrett, in waders, to walk into a mud pit. This is the only place for the women in the company to wrestle so tonight it’s Miss Kitty wrestling in the mud. You win by taking your opponent’s top off, which doesn’t sit well with Kitty. Oh and Jarrett will beat Chyna at No Mercy.

British Bulldog doesn’t care about what happened with Stephanie McMahon in England or what happens with the Rock tonight. He wants to be the WWF Champion…and here is Mankind to jump him.

There are a bunch of snakes in a room. Ok them.

Edge And Christian vs. New Brood

Match #3 in the Terri Invitational Tournament with Edge And Christian up 2-0. Cue Terri to make this a Texas Tornado match. The Hardys are sent into each other in the corner a d double hiptoss brings Jeff down. Stereo headbutts give Edge two and they head outside, with Matt hitting a DDT on the floor. Back in and a double suplex gets two on Edge, followed by Matt planting him for two more. Christian gets back in and Edge hits a spear for two on Jeff, who is sent outside. An assisted superplex drops Matt but Jeff is back in with the Swanton for a double pin on Christian at 6:12.

Rating: B-. Another match where these guys are being given the chance to go out there and do whatever they want, which makes for an entertaining match. The good thing is these matches are getting a bit longer every time and that makes things quite a bit better. The WWF knows what they have here and that is an encouraging sign for everyone’s future.

Val Venis admires himself in a mirror and pulls Mr. Rocko out of his jeans.

Here is Jeff Jarrett to introduce Ivory for the mud wrestling match. Miss Kitty gets in and we’re ready to go.

Ivory vs. Miss Kitty

I’m assuming this is non-title. Kitty rips off Ivory’s dress but gets her top taken off to lose at about 1:05. This was another level of dumb.

Post match the Fabulous Moolah and Mae Young show up and get thrown in the mud as well. Cue Chyna to kick Jarrett in with them, where Moolah and Young beat him up.

We look back at British Bulldog throwing a trashcan at Rebellion over the weekend and hitting Stephanie McMahon in the head. Vince McMahon and Test are not happy about the whole thing.

Shane McMahon says that Stephanie is suffering from amnesia. When asked about the Bulldog’s comments, he just walks away.

British Bulldog vs. Mankind

Bulldog jumps him to start and Mankind hammers away in the corner. The running knee connects and they go outside, where Bulldog gets in a headbutt. A whip sends Mankind into the steps for a nasty crash, followed by a chair to the head as I guess this is No DQ. Back in and a slam sets up the chinlock to keep Mankind down. A low blow makes it worse but Mankind is back with a double arm DDT for the double down. The Mandible Claw goes on but the referee gets shoved and then crushed in the corner. The match is thrown out at 6:10.

Rating: C. The problem here was very simple: there just wasn’t much for the Bulldog to do in the ring. He’s a generic brawler and feels out of place in 1999, as he doesn’t have much in the way of being a developed character. Other than “he’s British and mean”, what else does he have? It’s not a bad match by any means, but it’s really not interesting whatsoever.

Post match they fight into the crowd.

Jim Ross is with Steve Austin, who is shooting HHH themed targets. Austin is back to get his revenge and the WWF Title. He mocks the Game nickname and talks about how the title means everything. The name No Mercy is appropriate given what’s going to happen at the pay per view.

HHH goes into the room of poisonous snakes and opens one of the tanks.

Big Show vs. Big Boss Man

Michael Cole is on his own here as Lawler is off to “check on Miss Kitty”, which is code for “this match was taped for Heat and put onto the Smackdown taping to make up for the Droz accident”. Cole even updates us on Droz’s condition, acknowledging the terrible injury. Boss Man jumps him to start but gets sent into the buckle for his efforts. Boss Man actually fights back and manages a Boss Man Slam (not a great one but you could tell what it was) for two. Show is back up with a chokeslam attempt but Boss Man hits him with the nightstick for the DQ at 2:25.

Post match Boss Man tries to handcuff Show but the handcuffs don’t work. A chokeslam ensues instead. This was about all they could throw in from Heat (you could see the orange ring skirts) and it was fine for a last second replacement.

HHH is in the room with the snakes and talks about how he’s not afraid of them, just like he’s not afraid of the Texas Rattlesnake. Some of the snakes are put in a bag and HHH crushes it with a sledgehammer. HHH brings the bloody bag out to the stage and says this is nothing compared to what will happen to the other rattlesnake at No Mercy.

Val Venis is rather fired up to fight the Rock when Mankind runs in to jump him. The British Bulldog goes after Mankind and the villains leave him laying.

During the break, the Rock walked past Mankind and asked what’s wrong with him. Mankind tells him to go out there and win one for the Micker. Rock: “Who the h***’s the Micker? Idiot.”

The Rock vs. Val Venis

Rock jumps him to start and sends him out to the floor as this is apparently No DQ. They fight into the crowd with Rock knocking him right back to ringside. A swinging neckbreaker sets up a chinlock on Venis, who gets to the floor and tries to walk out. Rock isn’t having that and rams him into the set, followed by a suplex onto the ramp. Venis fights back at ringside, only to be sent hard into the steps.

Rock sends him over the announcers’ table but Venis is able to get in a spinebuster back inside. We hit another chinlock, this time on Rock, who is right back up with a fisherman’s suplex for two. Venis knocks him right back down and grabs a chair but here is Mankind to cut him off. Mankind swings the chair, which hits Rock by mistake. The Mandible Claw goes on so Venis kicks Mankind low. A Rock Bottom to Mankind sets up a Rock Bottom to Venis to give Rock the pin at 10:15.

Rating: C+. This was little more than a squash until the ending screwiness, which is what it should have been. Venis is not someone who is on the Rock’s level and suggesting that he could beat Rock in a straight up match would be beyond a reach. Mankind and Rock having issues isn’t a surprise, and now we get to see where they go next.

Rock poses to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. Not much to see on this one, though they did have to make a quick change with the Droz tragedy. As usual though, outside of the Edge And Christian/Hardys match, there was only so much in the way of good action on the show. I did like the HHH promo save for the crushing of the snake as it was overkill, but at least they had a theme. Not a great show here, but it could have been far worse.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter and Bluesky @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – October 4, 1999: Woof

Monday Night Raw
Date: October 4, 1999
Location: Continental Airlines Arena, East Rutherford, New Jersey
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re coming up on No Mercy and at least the top of the show is starting to come together. Last week saw Steve Austin named as #1 contender to face HHH for the title at the pay per view, though that might have been overshadowed by This Is Your Life Rock. That should be leading somewhere this week so let’s get to it.

Here is Smackdown if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

New Age Outlaws vs. Acolytes vs. Kane/X-Pac vs. Hollys

Non-title elimination match. Naturally it’s a big brawl to start until we settle down to Gunn press slamming Hardcore for two. They go outside with Gunn being sent knees first into the steps…and they’re both counted out for a double elimination at 1:38. That leaves X-Pac to clothesline Bradshaw but he’s quickly whipped hard into the corner for two.

X-Pac fights up but doesn’t want to tag. That’s fine with Kane, who comes in to clean house anyway. Kane even dropkicks Faarooq, who is right back up with a piledriver. That’s shrugged off and X-Pac is back in with a Bronco Buster to Bradshaw. The chokeslam hits Faarooq but the Clothesline From Bradshaw finishes X-Pac out of nowhere for the pin at 4:41.

Rating: C. So why were the Outlaws, as in the reigning champions, involved here? The story seems to be about Kane and X-Pac and the Acolytes, which makes the Outlaws (and the Hollys) feel totally unnecessary here. In other words, it’s a bunch of stuff happening that doesn’t make the match better but is there anyway, because reasons.

Post match X-Pac is ticked off and walks out on Kane.

Over the weekend at the UK exclusive Rebellion pay per view, the British Bulldog threw a trashcan and hit Stephanie McMahon by mistake. Then he powerslammed Chyna, beat X-Pac, and interfered in the main event.

Here is the British Bulldog, who blames Vince McMahon for Stephanie getting injured. Vince screwed him out of his title shot in the United Kingdom and made his own country boo him (JR disagrees). Bulldog doesn’t care about the UK or the USA because all he wants is the WWF Title. Therefore, he wants to beat up the Rock at No Mercy but here is Chyna to interrupt instead. She wants to see if his bite is as bad as his bark, which is apparently a challenge.

Mankind goes to see the Rock and thinks it’s time to end the Connection. Rock agrees, but it turns out he’s on the phone and had no idea what Mankind said in the first place.

Test says Stephanie McMahon has head trauma and post concussion syndrome. He’s as emotional about this as you would expect.

Mankind talks to Stevie Richards and has an idea of how to fix things with the Rock.

Fabulous Moolah and Mae Young attack Ivory and rip off some of her clothes.

New Brood vs. Edge And Christian

Match #2 of the Terri Invitational Tournament (Edge And Christian are up 1-0), with Terri on commentary. Edge hurricanranas Matt down to start and Christian comes in to slam Jeff a few times. Jeff manages to send Edge outside for a beating from Matt, who drops him throat first across the top. The Swanton gives Jeff two but Matt’s Lionsault hits raised knees. That’s enough for Christian to come in and clean house and Matt is sent outside. Edge spears Jeff out of the air for the pin at 4:21.

Rating: B-. it was a case where they didn’t have much time but what we got did work. That’s the series in a nutshell, as they’re working as hard as they can but there is only so much that can be done in so little time. Hopefully that changes, because you can certainly see something in there, which is kind of the point of the series. Or to let Lawler hit on Terri. Maybe both.

X-Pac challenges the Acolytes to a four corners match at No Mercy with Kane involved too. As in a singles match. This was around the time when I got very sick of X-Pac and I’m remembering why that was the case.

Here is HHH for a chat. He can’t wait for thirteen days before he gets his hands on Steve Austin again and wants to take him out for good. For now, he wants to talk to Jim Ross. Yeah forget about the broken arm thing, as JR can even sit down in a chair (uh oh). We see an interview from last Friday, with JR talking to Austin, who is not medically cleared to wrestle yet. Austin is working hard to rehab his knee in time for the match and no one is stopping him.

Back in the arena, HHH asks JR what Austin thinks of him (as in HHH). Lawler knows this isn’t going to go well as HHH asks JR again. JR: “He thinks you’re an a******.” HHH asks what JR thinks of him and it’s pretty similar. Lawler: “Well, thanks for being here JR.” The beatdown is on and Lawler basically calls JR a moron. Referees break it up after some good stomps.

Jeff Jarrett, with Ivory, accepts Moolah and Mae Young’s challenge for tonight. He cuts Ivory off in the process, as you might expect.

Mankind plays Yahtzee with actors from the show G vs. E.

Michael Cole takes JR’s place on commentary and we see the beatdown again.

Jeff Jarrett/Ivory vs. Fabulous Moolah/Mae Young

Miss Kitty is here with Jarrett and Moolah/Young’s music doesn’t work. Actually hang on as Jarrett throws Kitty (in a dress) to get beaten up in his place. Kitty manages to crawl away and bring Ivory in so Moolah throws some forearms. It’s quickly back to Kitty, with Ivory sending her in for a rollup to give Moolah the pin at 2:41. This was certainly a thing that happened and it went as you would have expected.

Post match Ivory beats up Young and Jarrett Figure Fours Kitty.

Mankind gets his makeup done and has a surprise for Rock tonight.

GTV shows Droz vomiting in D’Lo Brown’s bag.

Here is Mankind, with the G vs. E stars. Mankind plugs his appearance on the show before saying that he doesn’t like Val Venis grabbing his testicles. Mankind: “I didn’t like it when I was an altar boy and I didn’t like it last week.” With that out of his way, he teases another special guest but cue the Rock to interrupt. Rock brings up the idea of the team and suggests that he never wanted to team with Mankind…who cuts him off, saying he’s going to rededicate his career and life to this tag team. He doesn’t want to be remembered as a three time WWF Champion or the Hardcore Legend.

No, he wants to be remembered as half of the greatest tag team of all time. Mankind says that while Stephanie McMahon and Test’s wedding has been postponed, this was like a marriage right here! Rock isn’t sure on that but we pause so they can chant his name. Mankind doesn’t want to end up like the Briscos, the Funks or Skip and Zip. They should be the Three Musketeers, because he loves American history. Rock tells him what he can do with a sword…but here is Chris Jericho to interrupt.

Jericho calls this unfunny and thinks Rock should accept the marriage proposal, because he would make a perfect wife in a male/male marriage. He thinks Rock might be a little….and he shakes his hand. After a fan jumps into the ring and is quickly dispatched (Rock tells Jericho to keep his people out of the ring), Rock tells Jericho to know his role and shut his mouth. Two months ago, Jericho was down south beating someone named Juventud. Rock isn’t impressed, so he can face Jericho tonight. Mankind tries to do Rock’s catchphrases and it doesn’t go well.

Post break, Mankind, with Stevie Richards, is asked about a match tonight but gets jumped by the Dudleys. Mankind is hurt.

Chyna vs. British Bulldog

Chyna pulls him outside to start the brawl in a hurry, with Bulldog being sent into the steps. A hard whip sends Bulldog into the corner…and Jeff Jarrett runs in to jump Chyna for the DQ (with something involving coffee) at 1:16.

Post match Bulldog threatens to powerslam Chyna if HHH doesn’t come out here and give him a title shot. Then he powerslams her anyway.

The Dudley Boyz say that Stevie Richards and Mankind stole the Rock N Sock jacket from them and that’s breaking a Dudley rule.

Dudley Boyz vs. Stevie Richards/Mankind

Richards is dressed as Dude Love. The bell rings and here is Val Venis to distract Mankind. The fight goes up onto the stage as Venis joins commentary. Mankind dives onto Venis and gets beaten up by Bubba, who walks into a double arm DDT back inside. Venis gets on the apron and gets the Mandible Claw from Mankind, leaving Richards to walk into the 3D for the pin at 2:40.

Post match Venis leaves with Mr. Rocko.

Here is Vince McMahon for a chat. He isn’t happy with the British Bulldog, but he only wants an apology for Stephanie McMahon. That’s a demand and here is Bulldog again, as he’s all over this show. Bulldog won’t apologize, so Vince wants him in the ring for the beating. Nah, as Bulldog is taking the night off instead.

The Rock vs. Chris Jericho

Curtis Hughes is here with Jericho and Rock suggests turning him sideways. Hughes sneaks in from behind to jump Rock and Jericho comes in to…get clotheslined down. Rock misses a charge into the corner and it’s the bulldog into the Lionsault for two. The spinwheel kick drops Rock again and a suplex into the Arrogant Cover gets two more. A butterfly backbreaker gives Jericho another near fall and we hit the chinlock.

That’s broken up with a belly to back suplex but Jericho pulls him into the Walls. Rock makes it to the rope and they go outside, with Jericho sending him into the barricade. Back in and the lights go out (doesn’t seem to be intentional) and Jericho hits him with the bell for two. The referee gets bumped and it’s a double collision to leave the two of them down as well. The Rock Bottom onto a chair gives Rock the pin at 7:25.

Rating: C+. It was nice to see a match get some time around here and it made for a bit of a change of pace. At the same time though, it’s not exactly anything memorable or impactful, with Rock getting to beat up an up and coming heel. That being said, it’s still better than more British Bulldog.

Post match British Bulldog runs in for the brawl with referees breaking it up. Vince McMahon comes out to send Bulldog back inside for a beating from from Rock. The show ends but we get an Extra Attitude feature, with HHH running into beat Rock down. Mankind runs in for the save and it’s a People’s Elbow to HHH. That’s not enough though as Mankind gets to join in for a double People’s Elbow to really wrap it up.

Overall Rating: C-. As usual, the wrestling is hardly the best part of the show, but rather all of the energy and everything going nuts. That being said, there are a lot of weak points throughout the show, with stuff like the obsession with the British Bulldog and the Moolah/Mae Young stuff being pretty hard to take. Stevie Richards having a fairly prominent role is kind of funny as he’s just a lovable goof, but he’s also not out there every few seconds. There are good pieces here, but they desperately need to get some better focus. And less Bulldog, as he’s really not that interesting.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter and Bluesky @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Smackdown – September 30, 1999: It’s Short But It’s Long

Smackdown
Date: September 30, 1999
Location: Richmond Coliseum, Richmond, Virginia
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole

We’re coming off an all time Raw segment with This Is Your Life Rock, which is not likely to mean much around here. Instead, we’re likely going to be hearing more about the British Bulldog costing the Rock his WWF Title shot and then attacking champion HHH. That should be enough for the big story as we’re coming up on No Mercy as well. Let’s get to it.

Here is Monday Night Raw if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Chris Jericho vs. Road Dogg

Billy Gunn is here with the Dogg and Mr. Hughes is here with Jericho. The bell rings and they brawl into the crowd as the Hollys join commentary. Dogg sends him back to ringside for a whip into the steps and hammers away inside. The referee doesn’t like the violence and gets tossed to the floor, which is enough for Dogg to get disqualified.

Post match Gunn throws in a table and Dogg tries to put Jericho through it (as payback for an attack a few weeks ago). The Hollys jump him from behind though and Dogg gets put through the table again.

Vince McMahon isn’t happy with HHH and fines him $25,000 for his actions on Raw. In addition, he’s going to defend the WWF Title against the British Bulldog TONIGHT. Oh and The Rock will be the guest referee.

Here is Mankind (in the Rock N Sock Connection jacket) for a chat. He talks about This Is Your Life Rock and thanks the DOZENS AND DOZENS of fans for making it work. There is one person who messed it up by taking something that didn’t belong to him though, so Val Venis needs to get out here.

Cue Venis, who says hurry up because he has two beautiful women in the back and it isn’t his birthday. Mankind: “Val, I know what you’ve got in your pants and I want it.” Actually he needs it, which has Venis rather confused. Mankind is willing to turn his back so just whip it out and give it to him. Cole: “This is your life Mick Foley!” Venis says he doesn’t swing that way so Mankind describes it (Cole: “MICK THIS IS NETWORK TV!”) and says put it in his hand or he’ll put it in Venis’ mouth.

Venis didn’t know Mankind was like this but he doesn’t putt from that side of the green. Mankind has no idea what that means, but we see the GTV segment of Venis taking Mr. Rocko out of the trash and putting it in his pants. Venis realizes he got caught but says it was a joke for all the boys in the back. Mankind says neither he nor the Rock appreciates that and he goes for Venis’ pants. Venis bails and offers to go get the sock for him (thankfully acknowledging that he’s changed his pants since Monday). Mankind is a bizarre man but he can somehow make this stuff work.

HHH and Chyna are looking for Vince McMahon. During the break they find Vince and Shane, with HHH saying Vince is trying to find ways to screw him every week. HHH will find new ways around it ever week too.

The Rock thinks this show has turned into Let’s Make A Deal and Vince McMahon is Monty Hall. He’s fine with being the guest referee tonight and be completely unbiased because HHH can put his nose….oh you know by now.

Edge and Christian vs. New Brood

Gangrel is here with the New Brood and this is the first match in the Terri Runnels Invitational Tournament. Cue Terri Runnels to join commentary as Lawler thinks this should be called the Ryder Cup, which takes some time for Cole to get. The camera stays on Terri and Lawler for a bit as Terri explains the tournament: it’s really a best of five series for her managerial services and $100,000.

Jeff knocks Christian down and it’s off to Matt for a suplex into the Swanton for two (that’s so weird to see). Christian and Matt collide for a double down and Edge comes in to clean house. The Downward Spiral drops Matt for two as Lawler tries to say the tournament’s name without sounding dirty. Matt is knocked outside and a Doomsday suplex gives Christian the pin on Jeff to go up 1-0.

Rating: B-. They didn’t have much time here but these guys work well together every time. It’s so interesting to see their early days as they’re figuring things out and Gangrel is little more than window dressing for the Hardys. Things would get a lot better and you can see the fire in all of their eyes, which is making for a promising future.

The British Bulldog is ready for the main event and wants Rock to stay out of his way.

Mankind explains the Mr. Rocko/Val Venis situation but Rock isn’t sure who Rocko or Venis are. Mankind promises to figure this out to keep the Connection alive, with Rock telling him to go do it.

European Title: Big Show vs. D’Lo Brown

Brown is defending and Droz/Prince Albert are on commentary. Show throws him down and hits a suplex as Droz is complaining about “the bookers in the back” holding himself and Albert back. Brown fights up and hits a top rope clothesline to actually drop Show. The Low Down gets two as Albert gets up to watch from ringside. Droz distracts Brown as Albert goes up and dropkicks Show for the DQ.

Post match Brown gets beaten down again until Mark Henry runs in to chase Droz off. Brown leaves Henry again, with Henry saying they need to talk. With Brown gone, Henry talks about various addictions and says he has one of them. The reality is he’s a sex addict and it’s not a joke. He’s lost friends, family, his fiance, and a lot of money as a result of this. Now his mom has to see this, along with the people who know him. Henry starts crying and talks about how he can’t stop thinking about sex. It’s time to get some professional help and he walks off. Well that’s just depressing.

Stephanie McMahon and Test look through bridal magazines. Well Test wants to watch the game but he’s there too.

X-Pac/Kane vs. Acolytes vs. Dudley Boyz

Elimination tag for the #1 contendership and Bubba Ray has stolen the Rock’s Rock N Sock Connection jacket. We cut to the back where Stevie Richards shows Mankind about the stolen jacket before cutting back to Kane beating up D-Von. Bradshaw comes in for a boot to Kane’s mask but Kane hits a running DDT.

X-Pac comes in and gets taken down with a fall away slam, only to spin kick Faarooq in the face. The Acolytes double team X-Pac…and that’s a DQ. X-Pac kicks Bubba down and it’s off to Kane for the top rope clothesline on D-Von. Everything breaks down and it’s a Bronco Buster to Bubba, followed by the chokeslam to pin D-Von.

Rating: C. This didn’t have time to do much and, as usual, there was a lot going on in a single match. You had the stolen jacket, the referees being all aggressive, the stuff in the back, and the match itself. That’s all crammed into about five minutes and that’s not much time to get that much going. As usual, it would be better to just slow things down a bit, but that’s not how this era worked.

During the break, Mankind asks Bubba Ray about the jacket and tells him to come get it. He calls Mankind a freak and leaves, with Mankind not being pleased. Granted he doesn’t do anything about it, but he isn’t happy.

Here are Jeff Jarrett and Miss Kitty to say that the match with Chyna is going to be the Good Housekeeping match. That means he’s going to get to beat Chyna up with any household item he can find. Jarrett is ready to demonstrate to any woman around and calls out Cindy Margolis (who he attacked a few weeks ago), who is sitting in the crowd. He challenges Margolis and fellow actress Heather Kozar (on the upcoming UPN show Shasta McNasty) to a handicap match but here are all the women that Jarrett has attacked.

Jarrett challenges all of them and Miss Kitty doesn’t think this is a great idea. Jarrett beats up Fabulous Moolah and Mae Young but here is Chyna to make the save. The women proceed to beat the fire out of Jarrett with brooms, frying pans and everything else they can find, eventually chasing him to the back (that is so, so Memphis). Moolah and Mae jump Lawler, whose face is hilarious as he tries to get away.

Mankind admits to Rock that he misplaced the jacket, which has Rock annoyed but he’ll wear a Versace shirt instead. Mankind: “Don’t wear Versace! Don’t wear Versace!”

We actually talk to the head of security, with interviewer Terry Taylor saying this is an odd choice. He’s not happy with Steve Blackman attacking him, and then Blackman attacks him again. Yep, kind of obvious there.

Here is Mankind to call out Bubba Ray Dudley to give him the jacket back so here are the Dudleys…and I guess this is a match.

Mankind vs. Bubba Ray Dudley

I think? D-Von was in at the bell but then drops out as Val Venis is here with Mr. Rocko. Stevie Richards (dressed as Dude Love) comes in with a Stevie Kick to Bubba, who takes the jacket back. Mankind says he wants Rocko back so Venis gets in the ring (I’m assuming the match is over).

Venis says that he owes a lot of his career to Mankind doing the things he has done, like flying off of a Cell. Therefore, he’ll give Venis Rocko back, but he wants Mankind to close his eyes first. Then he grabs a testicular claw to take Mankind down. Stevie Richards comes in for a failed save and the Dudleys beat both of them up and DESTROY THE JACKET. Venis keeps cranking on Mankind and leaves him laying as the Dudleys leave. As usual, this worked because while the jacket is stupid, it means something to Mankind and that makes it matter.

WWF Title: HHH vs. British Bulldog

HHH is defending and The Rock is guest referee. Rock jumps Bulldog before HHH comes out so HHH is fine with stomping away on Bulldog on the floor. The bell rings and HHH covers, but Rock is looking at the crowd. HHH yells so Bulldog hits him low (Rock doesn’t care) and we see Steve Austin watching in the back. They fight to the floor as Rock jumps in on commentary.

Bulldog drops HHH on the ramp and they get back inside (Rock too) where the powerslam is countered. The Pedigree connects but Rock applauds rather than cover. Rock gives HHH the Rock Bottom and gets back on commentary. Bulldog covers and Rock counts two before saying it doesn’t matter if he counts three. Rock hits them both with the belt and stomps away before laying them out. This includes a People’s Elbow with Rock sliding across the mat without leaving his feet, which WWE hyped up as amazing and….not really? Rock leaves with the title and HHH is confused.

Rating: C. I’m not sure what to say about a match like this as it wasn’t about the match itself (obviously) and was more of a chance for Rock to play to the crowd. It worked well in that sense, but otherwise it was just five minutes of waiting for it to end, which is pretty much what happened. Not bad, but also barely a match.

We go to the back where Rock jumps HHH but gets jumped by the Bulldog, leaving HHH with the belt. Then Austin is waiting in HHH’s locker room and jumps him to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This was a special ninety minute episode for the sake of the Shasta McNasty (it didn’t last) pilot so they were a bit rushed. That being said, you still got a funny bit with Mankind and Venis, plus Edge and Christian vs. the Hardys. As was often the case around this time, things were moving very fast, but the show was still entertaining. Now it’s on to No Mercy, with some of the bigger matches already set, so things are looking in the right direction.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – September 27, 1999: This Is Your Life Rock

Monday Night Raw
Date: September 27, 1999
Location: Greensboro Coliseum, Greensboro, North Carolina
Attendance: 10,369
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re back to the chaotic days again and HHH is once again the WWF Champion, having won the Six Pack Challenge last night at Unforgiven. Steve Austin is not happy with this result and is apparently next up the new champion, which isn’t likely to go well. The rest of the main event scene has to fall out from there as well so let’s get to it.

Here is Unforgiven if you need a recap.

We open with some stills from the Unforgiven main event.

Earlier today, Vince McMahon negotiated a deal to end the referee strike. Thank goodness. They’re also allowed to be more firm with the wrestlers.

Opening sequence.

Here are HHH and Chyna for the big celebration. HHH doesn’t care what the fans think and they can kiss his a** every time he holds the title in the air. Last night he proved that he is the Game and no one is in his league. The best part of it all though was Steve Austin himself having to count the three on the Rock. It doesn’t stop there Austin, because he is next.

Cue the British Bulldog, who tells the Game Boy that they had a deal, saying that if either of them won the title, the other would get the first title shot on Raw. Bulldog wants the title tonight, but HHH makes it clear: he lied. That’s fine for Bulldog, who says he’s taking HHH out one way or another tonight. HHH says screw you, which doesn’t surprise Bulldog so he spears HHH down. Chyna makes the save and HHH gets in a low blow but the referees break it up. Cue Vince McMahon to say HHH will defend the title tonight…against the Rock.

We look back at Fabulous Moolah attacking Ivory.

Jeff Jarrett talks to Tom Pritchard about something.

Mick Foley is here….with balloons and someone under a sheet. Oh boy.

Stephanie McMahon and Test go tuxedo shopping.

Here are Jeff Jarrett, Miss Kitty, and Tom Pritchard for a chat. Jarrett says that Debra and Chyna were completely out of line last night so he wants a men vs. women tag match tonight.

Big Show vs. Chris Jericho

Before the match, Jericho, with Mr. Hughes, brags about ending Ken Shamrock’s WWF career because he is a bad mamma jamma. Now it’s time to rid the WWF of its biggest waste of sperm. Jericho comes right at him and is promptly thrown down as Prince Albert joins commentary. Hughes offers a distraction and Jericho gets in a boot to the head. Show powers out of that with ease and loads up the chokeslam but Albert gets on top for the DQ. Who is DQ’d for someone just getting on the top? I can’t imagine it matters.

Albert dropkicks Show but here is Road Dogg to go after Jarrett.

Mankind is talking to whomever is under the sheet when Stevie Richards, dressed as Dude Love, comes in to say he is one of the dozens. Mankind is more worried about losing royalties.

Chyna warns Tom Pritchard to stay out of things.

Here is Steve Austin to a chat. He doesn’t have a problem with the Rock, but there is no reason for him to get the title shot over Austin. Therefore, he wants Vince McMahon out here RIGHT NOW for an explanation. Cue Vince, who thanks Austin for reinstating him and yes Austin was promised a title shot, but he was never told WHEN. Vince gives him the title shot at No Mercy and after clarifying what Vince said, Austin says that better wind up being true.

GTV shows the Mean Street Posse throwing out I believe Terri after, ahem, activities, though Pete Gas isn’t happy.

European Title: Steve Blackman vs. D’Lo Brown

Brown is defending, having won the title last night. Droz comes out to do commentary as Brown kicks Blackman down and hits a Stunner over the top. They go outside and Blackman hits him with the kendo stick for the DQ after less than two minutes.

Post match Blackman uses the stick to beat up a security guard (the one who tackled him at Unforgiven) and Droz stomps on Brown. Then he vomits on him. Mark Henry comes out to check on Brown, who isn’t interested in listening.

During the break, Mankind ran into Steve Austin who did not seem impressed with the balloons.

Here is Mankind, with the balloons and gifts, but minus the person under the sheet. Mankind apologizes for attacking Rock last night and hopes that the Rock N Sock Connection can go on for years. First of all, he’d like Rock to come out here, or he’ll accept that the team is dead. Cue the Rock, who has a title match tonight so he wants to know why he’s here. Mankind: “This is big Rock. This is important. In fact, THIS IS YOUR LIFE!” JR: “What?”

Some fireworks go off and…nothing happens, though apparently a big poster of the Rock was supposed to come down but it didn’t work. Balloons and confetti go off and Mankind has a voice ask if “Dwayne” would like to answer a question. This brings out the first guest: Rock’s former home economics teacher (ignore that the name Mankind gives doesn’t match the chyron, which also says she’s an English teacher), who would have been the first to smell what the Rock was cooking.

Rock asks if she remembers how much he liked to make pancakes (JR: “Uh oh.”). Instead though, he had to make cookies and muffins, but FINALLY, right before summer vacation, he was allowed to make pancakes. But unfortunately, she was all out of Aunt Jemima. Rock asks if she still likes to bake break and if she knows her rolls. Well then she should know your roll, shut your mouth and check her Aunt Jemima, no pancake having a** directly into the Smackdown Hotel. The teacher (whatever her name is) leaves and Mankind has another surprise.

Next up is Rock’s high school football coach, but Rock won’t shake his hand. Rock brings up the last game of the season where he made a big sack and then DDT’d the quarterback. The coach made him run sprints in front of all the fans, which wasn’t nice. Rock asks if coach will blow his whistle one more time…and then do something special with it (Lawler: “Oh no.”). After telling coach where the whistle can go, Rock tells him to leave and even Mankind agrees.

Rock tells Mankind to get on with it so Mankind teases saying the MILLIONS. Rock: “Don’t you ever do that.” We get the real version and then Mankind brings out Rock’s high school girlfriend. Rock won’t let her hug him but does bring up various nights on her parents’ couch with various levels of physical involvement. She would tell him to “go for second base” but then stopped him. Rock: “YOU CUT THE ROCK OFF ON SECOND BASE!”

Now she wants to go one on one with the Great One and serve him a piece of that p******* pie? Lawler is DONE off that line. That’s not happening either so she can get out of here. With nothing else working, Mankind says he didn’t know it would go this badly but stop! They are chanting his name.

Mankind apologizes for how bad the guests have been, but it’s time for the people’s presents! First up: matching Rock and Sock jackets (and yes, their names are on the front). That’s not it though, because we have MR. ROCKO! And yes, Mankind does the voice for the whole thing. Finally though, it’s time for whomever is underneath the sheet (who came down at some point). That would in fact be….YURPLE THE CLOWN!

She gives Rock an IYQ sticker (read it out loud) and even Rock doesn’t know what to say. Finally, Rock asks her name, which of course doesn’t matter. Mankind says it DOES matter because he went through a lot of effort and expense to make this nice. Rock has insulted everyone and sometimes Mankind finds him to be a very ungrateful little man. It matters because Yurple is going to lead Greensboro in a birthday singalong.

Yurple sings and a cake is wheeled down, complete with candles. Rock says he appreciates his fans, but his birthday is May 2 “you stupid son of a b****.” Mankind: “It’s just that for some reason, every day I get to spend a little time with you feels like, like somebody’s birthday.” Before Rock has to find a way around that one, HHH runs out with the sledgehammer, which sends Rock and Mankind running. HHH pops some balloons to blow off some steam.

I’ve seen this a bunch of times over the years and I appreciate it more every time. This is the kind of segment that could not have worked with anyone else because Rock could get away with being such a jerk and Mankind was just so lovable that he pulled it off. It went on for about twenty five minutes and it is basically one long continuous joke that works throughout.

The whole point is how stupid it is but these two have such amazing chemistry that it somehow worked. Mankind screwing everything up, including not even having Rock’s birthday right, was great and I still remember watching this live and quoting it for years. I wasn’t the only one either, as this is still the highest rated non-match in WWF history and a mind blowing nine million viewers.

Granted it went nearly 12 minutes over and Vince yelled at both of them, only to then see the numbers and back off in a hurry. Does it build to anything? Not in the slightest, and that’s not an issue in the slightest here. Still an all time classic and one of the most perfectly put together ridiculous things you’ll ever see in wrestling.

Here are the New Age Outlaws, with Road Dogg saying they’re tired of not being respected. The open challenge is on and we see the Hollys getting ready to accept. That’s not how it goes though.

Tag Team Titles: New Age Outlaws vs. Kane/X-Pac

The Outlaws are defending. X-Pac and Dogg shake hands to start and Dogg grabs a headlock as the Hollys come down to do commentary. Hardcore isn’t happy with not getting a shot as Kane comes in and gets pummeled in the corner by Gunn. Kane boots Gunn in the face (that’s a long reach) but Dogg breaks up a chokeslam. Everything breaks down and the Hollys come in to jump the Outlaws for the fast DQ.

Post match the Hollys get quadruple teamed out.

Fabulous Moolah and Mae Young are here to teach Ivory to respect her elders.

Ivory vs. Fabulous Moolah/Mae Young

Non-title Evening Gown match and Jerry Lawler is worried. Young takes Ivory down to start but gets flipped over by her boa. Ivory goes for the dress and gets slammed, with Young covering because the instincts are still there. Back up and Ivory manages to get Young’s dress off and sends her outside, only for Moolah to drop Ivory. Moolah easily strips Ivory for the win.

GTV sees Val Venis find Mr. Rocko in the trash and put it in his jeans.

Jeff Jarrett/Tom Pritchard vs. Chyna/Debra

Hold on though as Chyna says she’ll only do the match if she gets a title shot at No Mercy for winning. Debra opens her top to distract Pritchard and Jarrett Figure Fours Chyna. Miss Kitty gets in for a catfight with Debra, leaving Pritchard to hit Chyna with the guitar…and she falls on Jarrett for the win in just over a minute. Well that’s dumb.

WWF Title: The Rock vs. HHH

HHH is defending and Steve Austin is on commentary. HHH hammers him into the corner to start fast but gets tossed over the corner for his efforts. The fight is quickly taken into the crowd and then back to ringside…and then back into the crowd. They get back inside for a change with Rock in control but he walks into the facebuster.

The Pedigree is countered with a catapult into the corner and Rock grabs a Samoan drop. Rock clotheslines him to the floor but gets dropped onto the announcers’ table. HHH grabs a chair and the referee gets shoved down before yelling at Austin. The Stunner into a Rock Bottom plants HHH…but British Bulldog runs in for the DQ.

Rating: C-. The match was just a big brawl until the ending segment, which is fine enough, but it’s a bit disappointing to see it go this way. At the same time, they weren’t exactly hiding that the Bulldog was going to get involved here as it’s pretty basic storytelling, but after a night of nothing matches, having one regular match would have been nice.

Bulldog powerslams HHH to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. This is a hard one to rate, as the show is the usual fast paced Attitude Era insanity, but there’s that big segment in the middle which is so out of nowhere and goes so well that the rest doesn’t really matter. They started getting ready for No Mercy and barely touched on Unforgiven outside of the main event, but that only means so much when a third of the show is built around one thing. Good show overall, though there’s probably a lot of nostalgia in there.

 

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WWE Vault – Strangest Summerslam Matches: Why You Might Not Remember

Strangest Summerslam Matches
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield, Vince McMahon, Bobby Heenan, Jim Ross, Gorilla Monsoon, Roddy Piper, Corey Graves

This could be interesting as I’m curious to know what WWE considers “strange”. There have been some unique matches throughout Summerslam’s history, though I’m not sure what I would classify as strange. Either way, we could be going through quite a few years here and that sounds fun so let’s get to it.

From 2013.

Kane vs. Bray Wyatt

Ring Of Fire match, meaning…well what do you think it means? The idea here is that there are walls of flames that will pop up if someone tries to leave or if someone (namely the Wyatt Family, here with Bray) tries to get in. You win by pinfall or submission and this is Wyatt’s in-ring main roster debut. Got all that?

The bell rings and the flames go up, albeit just a few inches. That’s not very impressive, though the flames jumping up feet as Kane clotheslines Wyatt down works WAY better. Kane knocks him near the flames, sending Wyatt into the corner instead. Wyatt fights back but gets suplexed so the flames go up again. The running body block drops Kane as Lawler describes Wyatt as “Duck Dynasty meets Charles Manson”.

Wyatt starts shouting while stomping so Kane kicks him in the face. The side slam has the flames flying again but Wyatt gets in his own knockdown and requests a kendo stick. Said stick catches on fire so the firemen spray it down. The chokeslam plants Wyatt for no cover as Kane is distracted by the Family trying to get in. Another chokeslam drops Wyatt again but the Family puts a blanket over the flames and get inside, meaning the double teaming can begin. Sister Abigail finishes Kane at 7:49.

Rating: C. When the whole point of the match is “they can’t get in because of the fire” and then they figure out how to get around the fire in about seven minutes, it’s only so interesting. As was the case with so many ideas involving Wyatt, this was a fun concept that didn’t exactly work, mainly because it got way too simple once the bell rang. Kane was a good first opponent for Wyatt, but this could have been done a lot better.

From 1999.

Steve Blackman vs. Ken Shamrock

Lion’s Den match, meaning in a small, round cage with weapons hanging from the sides. Blackman gets smart by using the nunchucks on Shamrock’s leg. Shamrock takes them away so Blackman sweeps the leg to take him down again. Back up and Shamrock pulls him into a cross armbreaker, which is broken up rather quickly.

Blackman rams him into the cage a few times and slowly hammers away before getting the kendo stick. Shamrock fights up with a belly to belly suplex and beats Blackman down with the stick for a change, including a nasty shot to the…well the shoulder but Shamrock was at least swinging for the head. Another shots to the head knocks Blackman silly for the win at 9:04.

Rating: C. I’ve never gotten much out of this, as it’s mainly just two guys hitting each other with weapons for about nine minutes. There’s only so much interest to be found in a match like this and the ending left something to be desired. It’s not a terrible match, but it’s another concept that really didn’t click.

From 2000.

Intercontinental Title: Eddie Guerrero/Chyna vs. Val Venis/Trish Stratus

Venis and Stratus are defending and whomever gets the fall is the champion. Venis shoulders Guerrero down to start but gets caught with a northern lights suplex for two. Chyna comes in for a double flapjack and goes after Trish (to a ROAR) but Venis makes the save. Guerrero comes back in to glare at Trish, followed by a hurricanrana for two on Venis.

Back up and Venis grabs a Blue Thunder Bomb before the two of them ram heads for a double down. NOW Trish is willing to come in and cover Guerrero for two, but it’s off to Chyna and the fans approve. Venis has to pull Chyna down out of the corner but Guerrero pulls Venis to the floor. That leaves Trish alone with Chyna and it’s a gorilla to make Chyna the Intercontinental Champion at 7:13.

Rating: C+. I’ve seen this match a bunch of times over the years and it really does kind of work. It’s a match where the ending is fairly obvious but you’re left wondering how we’ll get there. The good thing is they didn’t screw it up, as Chyna gets to wreck Trish and win the title, which is how this should have gone. Fun stuff.

From 1993.

Undertaker vs. Giant Gonzalez

Rest In Peace match, which basically means street fight. Harvey Wippleman is here with Gonzalez and has stolen the urn, shockingly enough, though there’s no Paul Bearer. Undertaker strikes away with the uppercuts to start but Gonzalez kicks him in the face. That means the situp, with Heenan wondering if that’s how Undertaker sits up in bed in the morning.

They go outside, where Gonzalez gets in a heck of a chair shot to put Undertaker down again. Undertaker slowly pulls himself up and they go back inside for more uppercuts, but Undertaker stops to go for the urn. That doesn’t work well…and here is Paul Bearer to one of the biggest reactions he’ll ever receive. Bearer actually takes out Wippleman and gets the urn back, with the fans rather approving. Undertaker fires off a bunch of clotheslines, with a top rope version finally putting Gonzalez away at 8:05.

Rating: D. I know I’m not exactly breaking any new ground with this, but Gonzalez was another kind of terrible. This was supposed to be some big special match and other than a chair shot, it might as well have been a regular match. It’s a good example of a star having nothing to work with and the results were definitely not pretty.

From 1992.

Rick Martel vs. Shawn Michaels

The deal here is neither can hit the other in the face as Sherri, who is at ringside, finds them both very attractive. The back of Sherri’s pants are missing and Vince loses his mind, as you might expect him to. Martel flips away from him to start and Michaels is frustrated early on. A dropkick puts Martel down but Michaels goes to say something to Sherri, allowing Martel to get in a cheap shot from behind.

Martel knocks him to the floor and stops to hug Sherri, who seems to approve. Back in and Martel backdrops him down but they’re done with this and start slapping each other…and Sherri faints. Vince thinks she had a heart attack and we pause for both of them to check on her, with Michaels hitting Martel in the face. They fight up the aisle (with Sherri looking up and then putting her head back down) for the double countout at 8:08.

Rating: B-. I’ve seen this match a few times now and the more I watch it, the more I find it kind of brilliant. It’s one of those matches that would only really work with these two or a very small select handful otherwise but dang if they didn’t knock it out of the part. Sherri made it even better and I had a great time with this again. The match isn’t even anything particularly outstanding, but the whole concept worked very well.

Michaels picks Sherri up and carries her to the back but Martel runs back down and decks Michaels, making him drop Sherri. Martel tries to take her back but gets knocked down as well, with Michaels taking her back. Then Martel comes out with a bucket of water and pours it over Sherri, causing Michaels to chase him to the back. Sherri storms after them and screams a lot. The post match stuff adds a lot to the whole story.

From 2008.

Intercontinental/Women’s Title: Kofi Kingston/Mickie James vs. Santino Marella/Beth Phoenix

Kingston and James are defending and this is winning team takes all. The women start things off with James kicking her down and hitting a basement dropkick as Marella is panicking. Phoenix backdrops her way out of trouble and it’s off to Marella, who gets monkey flipped.

Kingston comes in and sends Marella outside, where he jumps into Phoenix’s arms to avoid a dive. Back in and Marella goes to the eyes so Phoenix can come in to beat on Kingston. Marella’s snap suplex sets up a reverse chinlock but Kingston fights up in a hurry. It’s back to James to clean house but Phoenix gets in a shot from behind. The Glam Slam gives Phoenix the win and the titles at 5:42.

Rating: C. This is another one that I’ve seen a bunch of times over the years and it doesn’t quite work as well as the one from 2000. The problem here is it could have gone either way and that makes things a bit different. It’s also not as good of a match, as the Marella/Phoenix stuff is much more about comedy, which takes away some of its impact. Not bad at all though.

Marella does a huge over the top celebration and climbs onto Phoenix’s shoulders as they leave.

From 1991.

Big Boss Man vs. The Mountie

Jimmy Hart is with the Mountie and the loser spends the night in jail. After his always awesome entrance, Boss Man hits him in the face to start and gets two off a splash. Mountie goes to the eyes and heads up, only to be pulled out of the air for one heck of a spinebuster. The neck crank goes on so Hart offers a distraction, allowing Mountie to send Boss Man into the steps.

Back in and Mountie slowly hammers away as Heenan makes Andy Griffith references. An elbow puts Boss Man on the floor so Hart yells a lot, causing Monsoon to call him the best advertisement for birth control. Back in again and Mountie gets two off a piledriver, meaning it’s time for the shock stick. That’s kicked away though and Boss Man hits a Boss Man Slam for…two. Huh. One heck of an Alabama Slam finishes Mountie at 9:49.

Rating: C. The match itself isn’t the point here, though that Alabama Slam was awesome. What mattered here was the fun that you knew was coming, as again there was no reason to believe that the Boss Man would lose. At the end of the day, the Boss Man losing wouldn’t have led to anything entertaining, while Mountie going to jail writes itself. Not a great match, but the right story to tell.

Post match Mountie is immediately put in a police van….and somehow we don’t get the collection of stuff with Mountie going to jail later. Come on Vault. Be better than that.

From 2023.

Ronda Rousey vs. Shayna Baszler

This is MMA rules, which were never exactly specified coming in. The referee explains that you can only win by knockout or submission, which is quite the bit of information. Baszler won’t touch gloves and we’re ready to go. Baszler takes her down into a front facelock to start but gets wrestled down. Back up and Baszler starts kicking at the leg before a high kick to the head sends Rousey out to the floor.

Rousey staggers back in and Baszler starts in on the leg, allowing them to punch each other from the mat. Rousey gets up and manages a hard knee to the face to put Baszler down for a bit. Another shot sends Baszler into the corner and we pause for the medics to check on her, with Rousey wondering why the fight isn’t over. Rousey shoves the medics away and gets suplexed down by Baszler, who grabs the Kirifuda Clutch. That’s reversed into the cross armbreaker but Baszler escapes and gets the Kirifuda Clutch and Rousey is out at 7:26.

Rating: D+. Yeah this really didn’t work. Between not being clear on the rules and the execution being pretty bad on top of that, it just wasn’t a great idea. I definitely appreciate Rousey putting Baszler over on her way out, but whatever they were going for just did not work out that well. They would have been better off with a regular, hard hitting match as this came up short.

Overall Rating: C. I’m not sure what to make of a playlist like this, as there is no particular flow to it and nothing is connected, though that’s also not the point. This was about a bunch of random odd matches and that’s exactly what you got. They never said that the matches were good, and for the most part they really weren’t. Nothing on here really stands out as must see, but it has enough nostalgic value for a quick glance if you haven’t seen some of them in a minute.

 

 

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Summerslam Count-Up – 2000 (2023 Redo): This Show Always Gets Me

Summerslam 2000
Date: August 27, 2000
Location: Raleigh Entertainment and Sports Arena, Raleigh, North Carolina
Attendance: 18,124
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Of all the shows that I’ve seen multiple times over the years, there is something about this show that never stands out. I can never remember anything about the show, down to barely being able to come up with the main event. That’s a weird one as this is from one of the most well received years in WWF history. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is designed like some art house/weird film, featuring Freddie Blassie watching a video on the main event. That would be Rock defending the WWF Title against HHH and Kurt Angle, but the real story is the love triangle between HHH, Angle and Stephanie McMahon.

Jim Ross brags about the $1.1 million gate and that always sounds weird.

Right To Censor vs. Rikishi/Too Cool

Before the match, Steven Richards says he was thinking the Right To Censor would be better received here in the Bible Belt. Rikishi brings two of the Goodfather’s former ladies with him, with one of them being identified as Victoria. It’s a brawl to start until Scotty gets two hammer Bull down in the corner. Too Cool’s double suplex lets Scotty dance a bit so it’s off to Goodfather. That doesn’t go well either as Sexay knocks him to the floor, where he shoves the women down.

Back in and a double big boot gives Bull two as JR has fun saying “Sexay”. Richards adds a powerbomb for two, only to get caught with a superplex. The diving tag brings in Rikishi (not holding the tag rope because rules mean nothing) and house is quickly cleaned. Victoria sends a departing Richards back inside and the villains are stacked up in the corner. Three straight running hip attacks look to set up the Stinkface but Buchanan makes the save. The Steven Kick finishes Scotty at 5:23.

Rating: C. Well, ok then. I’m not sure why you would have Rikishi and Too Cool lose in the opening match and kill the mood like that but the Right To Censor was a slightly bigger deal at the moment. The match itself was what you would expect, but I was actually surprised at the result, which is kind of a nice feeling.

Kurt Angle and Stephanie McMahon went to find each other earlier, despite HHH not being here yet.

We look back at Angle kissing a concussed Stephanie on Smackdown, in a story that could have gone a long way.

Hardcore Champion Shane McMahon supports Stephanie’s decisions….and has to run away from Steve Blackman.

Road Dogg vs. X-Pac

This is the result of X-Pac headbutting Dogg off the apron and through a table, which left X-Pac surprised for some reason. X-Pac takes him to the mat for some riding and Dogg isn’t happy. Back up and Dogg sends him outside before hitting a clothesline back inside. X-Pac kicks him into the corner though and the Bronco Buster connects. The chinlock brings Dogg back up so X-Pac kicks him in the face for two more. Another Bronco Buster connects but this time Dogg is back up with the shaky jabs. The pumphandle slam is loaded up but X-Pac kicks him low and hits a quick X Factor for the pin at 4:40.

Rating: C. Not much to this one either as they’ve had a pair of short matches to start the show. That would seem to be a heel turn from X-Pac as the villains continue their hot start. X-Pac and Dogg teamed together for a bit but it never felt like the real DX. The Outlaws would have made for a better feud like this but with Billy Gunn out injured, this is about all you can get.

Post match X-Pac says they’re still a good team, but Dogg gets up and hits the pumphandle slam.

Eddie Guerrero and Chyna are ready for their mixed tag for the Intercontinental Title. Chyna says one of them are getting lucky.

Trish Stratus and Intercontinental Champion Val Venis are ready for the match, but Venis gets annoyed at Stratus saying she would be a better centerfold than Chyna.

Intercontinental Title: Chyna/Eddie Guerrero vs. Trish Stratus/Val Venis

Venis and Stratus are defending and it seems that only Stratus can’t leave as champion. Eddie and Val start things off with Eddie hitting a jumping elbow and grabbing a northern lights suplex for two. Back up and Chyna comes in to deck Venis in the face and it’s a double flapjack for two. Val cuts Chyna off with a knee to the ribs but Chyna blasts him with a clothesline.

Chyna makes the mistake of going after Trish though and Val is right on her with a suplex. Another suplex has Chyna adjusting her gear and even JR has to comment on how….non-existent some of the gear is. Eddie tries to come in and that’s enough for Chyna to get in a low blow.

That and a DDT are enough or Eddie to come in and clean house, including the hurricanrana out of the corner for two. Venis’ Blue Thunder Bomb gets the same so for some reason it’s off to Trish. This goes as well as expected, as Chyna wrecks her with some clotheslines until Venis makes a save. Eddie pulls Venis out though and Trish’s clothesline makes her fall down instead. A gorilla press gives Chyna the pin and the title at 7:04.

Rating: C+. There’s the first feel good moment of the show as Chyna exploits the completely legal loophole to win the title. That being said, it makes a lot more sense, as Venis, even the serious version, did not feel like someone who belonged as Intercontinental Champion in 2000. Eddie and Chyna really were great together and you could feel the chemistry here.

Eddie puts the title on Chyna in a nice moment.

We look at a WWF Radio live broadcast from WWF New York. Mick Foley danced and Chyna liked his worm.

Stephanie McMahon makes it very clear: Kurt Angle kissed her…..but he’s good at it.

Tazz vs. Jerry Lawler

Tazz attacked JR and it’s time for Jerry to stand up for him. For a bonus, Tazz attacked Jerry’s rental car with JR inside, hurting JR’s eyes. As a result, here is Tazz with a Tazz themed JR hat and a cane to really be a jerk. Lawler punches him in the face to break up the blind bit and even adds a dropkick into the corner. There’s the middle rope fist but a second misses, allowing Tazz to hammer away.

Tazz rips at the face and before having to headbutt Lawler a bit low to cut off a comeback. For some reason Tazz goes up and misses a Swanton of all things, meaning it’s time for the strap to come down. The piledriver connects but the referee gets bumped. Tazz gets the Tazmission but yells at JR once too often, causing JR to break a jar of candy over his face. Lawler gets the pin at 4:25.

Rating: C. You know what you’re going to get with a Lawler match and that limited offense was on display here. That being said, Lawler’s matches still work because the fans care about him and wanted to see him beat Tazz up. It’s someone standing up to a bully and that is always going to work, no matter how limited Lawler happens to be in the ring.

Shane McMahon has to run from Steve Blackman again.

Hardcore Title: Shane McMahon vs. Steve Blackman

Shane is defending and runs into the ring to hide from Blackman, as apparently hide and seek isn’t Shane’s strong suit. Blackman brings in his own kendo stick and trashcan, which are enough to have Shane running again. Actually hold on as Blackman is nice enough to throw the stick to Shane and turn his back. Blackman isn’t that stupid though and grabs the stick to chase Shane off for the….are we at four times already?

They go into the crowd with Blackman getting in a trashcan shot as the beating begins. Back to ringside and a hard kick drops Shane again as this is destruction so far. The spinning trashcan lid shot to the back of the head keeps Shane in trouble (and looked PAINFUL) and now it’s time for a bunch of weapons. Blackman puts the trashcan on Shane and unloads with the sticks (JR: “Like Max Weinberg and the Max Weinberg 7!”) before grabbing a leather strap.

Said strap is tied around Shane’s neck so he can be pulled off the middle rope for a crash. To make things interesting, Blackman grabs a half crab while still choking but here are Test and Albert for the save. As Lawler points out that JR is bleeding from something, Albert crushes Blackman in the corner and Test adds a hard clothesline. Test’s always good looking top rope elbow crushes a trashcan lid onto Blackman’s chest and now Shane is back up for the dancing punches.

A quick comeback bid is cut off in a hurry and Shane hits a jumping street sign to the face. The strap is tied around Blackman’s neck for a change and they take him up towards the entrance. Test can’t quite shove a speaker onto Blackman as he rolls away but can’t do anything else. Albert kendo sticks Test by mistake though and NOW the comeback can be on.

Well for all of a few seconds at least, as Shane gets in a cheap shot and then runs away. Shane makes the mistake of climbing the set (like I said: hiding isn’t his strong suit) but Blackman is there with more stick shots to knock him down for a twenty five or so feet fall down onto a bunch of stuff. After climbing down a bit, Blackman drops a huge elbow for the pin and the title at 10:17.

Rating: B-. The wrestling wasn’t the point here (obviously) but this was a heck of a star making performance for Blackman. Granted there is only so far you can go with this kind of a personality but this worked well for him. Blackman fought off three people at once and then hit the big elbow at the end for the win. This was WAY more fun than I would have bet on and was a nice change of pace from the rest of the show.

Shane is taken away on a stretcher due to reasons of HE FELL A REALLY LONG WAY.

Stephanie McMahon freaks out over the whole thing when Kurt Angle comes in. She immediately asks about Shane, who Kurt says had the wind knocked out of him (Lawler: “THE WIND KNOCKED OUT OF HIM???”). Mick Foley comes in and references the kiss from Smackdown before leaving rather quickly.

Video on Chris Benoit vs. Chris Jericho. They hate each other so now it’s time to go 2/3 falls. Shane McMahon has been in Benoit’s corner but….yeah.

Chris Jericho vs. Chris Benoit

2/3 falls. They go straight to the mat for the slugout to start until Benoit avoids a charge to send the shoulder into the post. It’s too early for an STF or the Crossface so Jericho snaps off a belly to back suplex. A shoulder breaker takes Jericho back down as Lawler talks about how much he hates being in 2/3 falls matches. Jericho is right back up with a missed Lionsault and now the Crossface goes on. Jericho taps at 3:16, which Lawler thinks was a strategic move (or, you know, the Crossface hurts a lot).

The Crossface goes back on (smart) and Benoit cranks HARD until Jericho makes the rope. Benoit ties him in the Tree of Woe so he can pull on the bad shoulder some more. Back in and the shoulder is sent hard into the post as Jericho can’t get anything going here. Benoit does it a second and third time but Jericho slugs away with the good arm. That’s fine with Benoit, who snaps off a German suplex. A second attempt is countered into the Liontamer though and Benoit has to tap at 8:40 to tie it up.

Jericho hits a backbreaker for two and a top rope elbow to the jaw gets two. The arm gives out on a powerbomb attempt so Benoit is back with a dragon suplex for two of his own. Benoit goes up but gets pulled down with a super hurricanrana for the double knockdown, with Jericho landing on the bad shoulder again. Back up and Jericho hits some running clotheslines, followed by the spinwheel kick for two. The Lionsault connects but the shoulder gives out again. With nothing else working, Jericho stomps away but Benoit grabs a cradle and uses the ropes for the pin at 13:21.

Rating: B. I wasn’t wild on the ending, if nothing else because it made me think of the same way Benoit vs. Kurt Angle at Wrestlemania X7 went about eight months later. What matters here though is how good the chemistry between these two really is. They know how to work off of each other and the arm vs. back stuff worked well. You know that these two are always going to work well together and that was the case again, as they had some time and put together a heck of a match.

HHH JUST NOW arrives so we look at the Smackdown kiss again, plus the near second kiss from earlier tonight.

We recap the Tag Team Title match. Edge and Christian, the Dudl….it’s the first TLC match. You get the idea.

Tag Team Titles: Edge and Christian vs. Dudley Boyz vs. Hardy Boyz

Edge and Christian are defending. The Hardys grab some chairs to start but Edge and Christian take over rather quickly. It’s already time for the first ladder but Bubba sends it into Edge’s face for a nasty smash. Bubba’s climb is cut off by a Hardys powerbomb, with Bubba’s leg being caught in the ladder for a nasty landing. Edge is back up with a double Russian legsweep to bring D-Von and Jeff off the ladders and the Bubba Bomb drops Christian hard as well.

Jeff is knocked off a ladder and lands on another, sending it straight into Matt’s face for more pain. D-Von puts a ladder in the corner and that means it’s What’s Up to Edge. It’s time for the tables (that sequence still works) and a 3D puts Christian through one. Four tables are stacked up on the floor (uh oh) but Edge grabs a chair to save Jeff from a rather large powerbomb. Ever the grateful one, Matt hits a Twist of Fate on Edge, setting up the legdrops from/over the ladder to hit Edge again.

Jeff rams a ladder into D-Von’s face (ouch) as Matt crushes Edge inside a ladder. Christian goes up and is rocket launched onto the ladder onto Edge onto the ladder. With that not being enough, the big ladder is set up on the floor so Jeff can….miss the Swanton to Bubba through the table.

Matt throws the normal ladder outside and grabs the big one so everyone but Bubba and Jeff can go up. The other four come crashing down so a very staggered (thanks to a chair shot) Bubba comes in but Edge and Christian shove him through the pile of tables at ringside. Cue Lita to shove Edge and Christian’s ladder over for a double crotching so Matt can go up.

That ladder is shoved down as well, with Matt crashing through more tables at ringside. Edge spears Lita down but somehow Jeff is back up to climb with D-Von. They both grab a belt but the ladder is moved, leaving D-Von to crash. Edge and Christian are back in to spear Jeff down with the ladders (ouch again) and the titles are retained at 14:47.

Rating: A-. You know what you’re getting with these matches and they continue to be incredible. This was all about having six people (and Lita as a bonus) going out there and wrecking each other in pure carnage. It also doesn’t feel like a bunch of random spots as you have stuff set up and paid off later, with the teams actually working together. This is so much easier to watch (and remember) than having six to eight people going nuts, with the bumps and crashes looking better as well. Awesome stuff here, and somehow they would do it even better.

Everyone gets a well deserved standing ovation.

HHH yells at Stephanie McMahon (who apparently he hasn’t seen since Smackdown) about the kiss, with Stephanie saying Kurt Angle took advantage of her. He orders her to stay away from Angle, but she insists HHH is the only man for her.

The Kat vs. Terri

Stinkface match and Al Snow is here with the Kat. Cue Perry Saturn to cover Terri up, with JR not getting the logic. Lawler: “Why can’t we get this match? I get Tazz!” Kat slams her down to start but Saturn pulls Terri outside. Back in and….I’m not sure if that was a spear or a clothesline but it sets up the catfight. The Bronco Buster connects as JR notices they’re both in rather large heels. The referee gets crushed so Snow throws in Head to knock Terri cold. Kat gives her the Stinkface for the win at 3:03.

Rating: F. To call this wrestling would be an insult to wrestling as they’re not hiding what they’re going for here. This stuff is embarrassing these days and while Terri had some value as a manager, this was a total waste of time. I know why it was there, but put anything else on instead of this nonsense.

The Acolytes toast Vince McMahon at WWF New York. And seem to take his money.

We recap Undertaker vs. Kane. Undertaker came back a few months ago and as is custom, Kane turned on him. It’s time for the first Biker Taker vs. Kane showdown.

Undertaker vs. Kane

The fight starts in the aisle, with Kane being sent into the post. Undertaker goes evil by trying to rip off the mask so Kane grabs a chair (the referee had said he would let them fight). That’s broken up so Undertaker chairs Kane down and manages to rip off part of the mask. That fires Kane up so he sends Undertaker in the steps, only to have said steps hit the post.

Undertaker grabs the steps to hit Kane in the face instead and the bloody Kane is sent back inside. A low blow gives Kane a breather and he slugs away until Undertaker spears him down. More of the mask is ripped off and Undertaker kicks him low to block a chokeslam attempt. Undertaker gets the whole mask off and Kane walks out at we’ll say 7:20.

Rating: B-. It was barely a match, but I’ll take these two having a slugout fight instead of watching them do a regular match. That’s what you would want to see from this and they made it work. It never made a ton of sense to have them going technical and with chinlocks and such ala Wrestlemania XIV, so go with what makes sense here and get some more value out of the thing.

Kurt Angle calls….Stephanie, as HHH is getting ready next to her. Stephanie: “Hi….mom!” HHH wants to talk to her but there’s no one on the phone.

We recap the WWF Title match, with the love triangle being the main story and The Rock, the champion, just kind of being thrown in on the side. Angle and HHH got a double pin in a triple threat #1 contenders match to set this up and they’ve been off to the races since.

WWF Title: The Rock vs. HHH vs. Kurt Angle

The Rock is defending. Before the match, Angle apologizes….for not doing what he did a lot sooner. Cue HHH and the fight is on fast, even with no Rock. Angle manages a Cactus Clothesline to put both of them on the floor and Angle gets posted. HHH loads up the announcers’ table but it collapses as he tries the Pedigree, with Angle bouncing face first onto the floor.

With Angle clearly knocked loopy, HHH grabs the sledgehammer but here is the Rock to officially get things going. Rock hits a clothesline and heads to the floor as well while Angle is taken out on a stretch. HHH manages to drop Rock onto the other announcers’ table and they head back inside as this has turned into a singles match for the time being. Rock gets sent back outside as HHH runs up the aisle to pull Angle back to ringside (even Lawler thinks this might be too far).

Rock comes back to break that up and takes HHH back to ringside for a low blow…..as Stephanie McMahon comes out to check on Angle. With Angle gone, HHH hits a clothesline on Rock but here is Stephanie to cheer on HHH. The jumping knee gets two on Rock and HHH tells Stephanie to get the belt. Stephanie slaps the timekeeper and comes in with said belt, which hits HHH by mistake.

HHH is back up with a low blow and demands Stephanie go to the back, as we settle down for maybe the first time so far. Back in and a sledgehammer to the ribs drops Rock, which sends JR into a rant about someone GETTING THE HAMMER. Some shoulders to the bad ribs keep Rock in trouble and the facebuster gets two. The slow beating (and JR’s rants about the hammer) continues but Rock is back with his swinging neckbreaker.

HHH knocks him down again and goes up, earning himself a superplex for a huge crash. We cut to the back where Stephanie is imploring Angle to get off the stretcher and help HHH. He says he’ll do it for her, with Lawler thinking this might be too much. Cue a rather concussed Angle as Rock fires off the right hands in the corner.

A quick Pedigree gives HHH two, with Angle pulling HHH out and whipping him into the steps. Angle gets his own two on Rock and hits a belly to belly for the same. The Rock Bottom gets two with HHH making the save this time and let’s get the sledgehammer again (JR getting more and more sick of it is hilarious). HHH’s right hand hits Stephanie by mistake so Angle sledgehammers HHH down. Rock clears Angle out and drops the People’s Elbow to retain at 20:07.

Rating: B-. This was a VERY uniquely booked match and I’m not sure it worked. The idea of having Angle taken out of the match for such a long time was strange enough but Rock vs. HHH was THE feud of 2000 so it was hardly a stretch. The problem seems to be more that Rock is just kind of there while everything else is playing around him and that makes for an odd match. It was still good, but it’s much more of an oddity than anything else. Also, just to make it worse, according to Angle, the concussion was scripted but he wound up getting a legitimate one and has pretty much no memory of the match.

Overall Rating: B. This show started slowly but once it picked up, it picked up very well. The first three or four matches are pretty much nothing to see but once Steve Blackman comes out to save it (….didn’t expect to say that), it was mostly awesome, safe for a few bumps in the road here and there. Overall it’s certainly worth a look, with the unfortunately forgotten TLC I and Benoit vs. Jericho certainly being worth your time.

 

Ratings Comparison

Right to Censor vs. Too Cool/Rikishi
Original: B-
2013 Redo: C
2023 Redo: C

X-Pac vs. Road Dogg
Original: C-
2013 Redo: D
2023 Redo: C

Val Venis/Trish Stratus vs. Eddie Guerrero/Chyna
Original: D+
2013 Redo: D+
2023 Redo: C+

Tazz vs. Jerry Lawler
Original: C+
2013 Redo: D
2023 Redo: C

Steve Blackman vs. Shane McMahon
Original: B
2013 Redo: B-
2023 Redo: B

Chris Benoit vs. Chris Jericho
Original: A
2013 Redo: A-
2023 Redo: B

Dudley Boys vs. Edge and Christian vs. Hardy Boys
Original: A-
2013 Redo: A
2023 Redo: A-

The Kat vs. Terri
Original: F-
2013 Redo: N/A
2023 Redo: F

Undertaker vs. Kane
Original: B
2013 Redo: C
2023 Redo: B-

The Rock vs. HHH vs. Kurt Angle
Original: B
2013 Redo: B
2023 Redo: B-

Overall Rating
Original: A
2013 Redo: A-
2023 Redo: B

There is a lot of jumping around in here and it made for quite the interesting rewatch.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Summerslam Count-Up – Summerslam 1999 (2013 Redo): The Cameo Show

Summerslam 1999
Date: August 22, 1999
Location: Target Center, Minneapolis, Minnesota
Attendance: 17,130
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

This is the end of the summer for an interesting year in the WWF. The main event is the now mega heel HHH and the returning Mankind challenging Austin for the world title, but there’s another main attraction: Minnesota Governor and former wrestler Jesse Ventura is the guest referee for the second time in the history of this event. 1999 is a year remembered for a lot of flash and little substance but hopefully that doesn’t hold true here. Let’s get to it.

The opening video talks about various guest referees over the years, including Mike Tyson and both McMahons. Jesse Ventura talks about how he’ll be the law in the ring and doesn’t care what happens.

Jesse lectures Chyna and HHH about not cheating. Chyna is allowed to be out there but the pinfall has to be in the ring and it has to be legal.

The recently debuted Chris Jericho yells at Jericholic Howard Finkel for being late.

Intercontinental Title/European Title: Jeff Jarrett vs. D’Lo Brown

Brown holds both titles coming in and Jarrett’s manager Debra is in a bikini with a coat over it. Jeff sends her to the back to make sure the fans completely hate him. In the back, Debra offers to escort Brown to the ring to get back at Jarrett. Jeff jumps D’Lo to start but the champion comes back with a powerslam for one. Another powerslam gets two and Jeff can’t bail to the floor for a breather. A leapfrog is countered into a short powerbomb for two but Jeff comes back with a sleeper.

Brown is sent to the floor and a baseball slide sends him into the barricade. Ross gets in one of his eye roll worthy lines by saying Brown wasn’t safe on that one. I love JR but when he gets bad it’s hard not to cringe. A clothesline puts Jarrett over the barricade and Brown pounds away. This is basic stuff so far but not bad at all. Back in and Jarrett gets in some shots to take over as the fans are behind the champion.

Jarrett hits a tornado DDT on the arm and wraps it around the post. The fans are more interested in the recently named Puppies. Jarrett misses a running crotch attack and gets caught in a running Liger Bomb for no cover. A tilt-a-whirl powerslam gets two and a quick legdrop gets two. Brown misses a modified Swanton but here’s Debra on the apron. Jeff gets the guitar but here’s Brown’s training partner Mark Henry to destroy the guitar over D’Lo’s head to give Jarrett the titles. Debra of course rejoins Jeff eight minutes after leaving him.

Rating: C+. Nice opener here but the scent of Russo is strong in this one. Debra turned twice within a span of ten minutes in addition to interference and a run-in during a match for two titles at once. These two could clearly have a good match on their own but we had to bog it down with extra stuff anyway. That’s Russo 101: yeah it can make things interesting, but at other times it gets in the way of good wrestling.

Edge and Christian are ready for Tag Team Turmoil (a tag team gauntlet match) tonight. They outgrew Gangrel and are ready for his new team: the Hardys.

Tag Team Turmoil

As mentioned, Edge and Christian start against the Hardys which is a layup for a good start. The Canadians are good guys here and we have six teams involved with the winners getting a tag title shot tomorrow on Raw. Naturally it’s a brawl to start until we get down to Edge vs. Matt. A DDT puts the Hardy down and it’s off to Christian for a double hiptoss for two. Christian BADLY misses a spinwheel kick but it’s Gangrel interfering to give the Hardys control.

The Hardys take their shirts off to almost no reaction so you know they’re evil here. Jeff hits a slingshot springboard moonsault for two followed by Poetry in Motion to crush Christian in the corner. Matt takes forever to cover and brings in Jeff for a senton (not yet the Swanton) Bomb for two.

Edge makes the save and allows Christian to hit a double reverse DDT to set up the hot tag. Everything breaks down and it’s Edge and Jeff running the barricades to set up a spear in midair. Christian dives onto them both followed by Matt mostly missing a moonsault to take everyone else out. Back in and Edge pulls Matt off the top, setting up a top rope elbow to give Christian the pin.

The third team in is Mideon/Viscera and the big man is starting with Christian. Viscera hits a quick Samoan drop for no cover and it’s off to Mideon for a double elbow drop. A knee drop gets two but Christian avoids a middle rope elbow. Off to Edge who speeds things up but gets drilled by a spinwheel kick (again it barely connected but it’s more excusable with Viscera). Edge avoids a charging big man and a double shoulder puts Viscera outside. Mideon is speared down for the pin.

Droz/Prince Albert (Tensai) are the fourth team and it’s Albert quickly throwing Edge into the corner. JR gets on Jerry for not knowing anything about Albert but Lawler makes a great point: “Look at him and you know everything you need to know.” Albert gets two off a neckbreaker as the announcers argue whether football careers matter in wrestling (Hint: most of the time they don’t). Christian chop blocks Albert and the Downward Spiral sends Edge and Christian to the next match.

The Acolytes are here before the three count and it’s Bradshaw working over Edge to start. Edge comes back with a swinging neckbreaker and a missile dropkick as JR is whiny because Lawler pointed out how stupid the football stats were. Bradshaw powerbombs Edge out of the corner for two and it’s off to Faarooq. ANOTHER spinwheel kick barely connects (the production staff isn’t on their game tonight) but Bradshaw gets a tag before Christian does.

A belly to back suplex gets two for Bradshaw and it’s back to Faarooq for more basic power offense. We hit the chinlock for a bit before the Faarooq spinebuster sets up an arrogant cover for two. Edge gets up for a DDT and it’s a double tag to Christian and Bradshaw. Everything breaks down and Christian gets two off a tornado DDT. Edge drops Christian onto Bradshaw as the Hollys come out before the pin. The distraction lets Bradshaw kill Christian with the Clothesline to get us down to the final two teams.

Faarooq hits a quick Dominator on Crash but Hardcore makes the save. The cousins get in an argument over who gets to fight Faarooq but it’s the Acolytes getting to beat up Hardcore. It’s back to Crash who has no effect on Faarooq so the announcers bicker some more to entertain us. Hardcore finally gets the tag and dropkicks Faarooq, triggering a brawl between the cousins. Faarooq hits a quick spinebuster on Hardcore for the pin and the title shot.

Rating: C-. This match had the same issues that almost all gauntlet matches have: if these teams can get wins this fast, why don’t they do it all the time? The matches are just quick segments instead of actual matches with the longest being a slightly longer version of a TV match. However there was hope on the horizon as Edge and Christian and the Hardys would have a rematch with ladders in two months. Also, a team is coming from Dudleyville in about two weeks. The magic approaches.

The Hollys fight again.

Big Show and Undertaker arrive.

Al Snow grooms his dog Pepper and warns him of Boss Man singing Ethel Merman songs. Good advice actually.

Road Dogg comes out to watch the next match. He wants a shot at the Hardcore Title tomorrow night but here’s the brand new Chris Jericho to interrupt him. He’s on a raised platform in front of the crowd and this is his PPV debut. Jericho is disappointed in this whole show. He can’t believe it but Raw is Snore has been topped by Summersham. The people here have been conned into paying for it and now they look like fools.

Jericho rips on the roster and says the worst is standing in the ring right now. No one cares about Roadie and his spelling. If Dogg wants to be impressive, spell lugubrious. He makes fun of Dogg’s clothes and haircut and says DX sure sucks. Road Dogg tells him to shut up and Jericho is SHOCKED. Dogg’s mama cares about him but he’s not sure if he should do the catchphrase because Jericho might take him up on it.

Hardcore Title: Al Snow vs. Big Boss Man

Boss Man is defending and Dogg is doing commentary. Before the match Snow leaves Pepper in a small kennel in the back. Snow: “You know Head came to the ring with me.” Snow is waiting on Boss Man on the set and hits a high cross body to get us going. Dogg gets up and is going to be a roving reporter. Snow hits Man with a chair and they go to the back almost immediately.

Boss Man comes back with right hands and breaks a chalkboard over Snow’s head. Pepper’s case goes upside Snow’s head but Snow hits him with the board. Boss Man steals a crutch to blast Snow in the back before sending him into the Pepsi machine. Snow avoids the falling machine and throws Boss Man into the side of an SUV. They open a garage door and head outside before going across the street to a bar.

They’re fighting in front of the door and a superkick gets two for Snow. Snow is thrown through the patio furniture for two and we head inside. A shot with the Yellow Pages puts Snow down but he gets up to hit on some chick. Snow hits him with a magazine rack and they slug it out with broomsticks.

We hit the restroom for the required “comedy” spot with Boss Man taking soap in the eye. A beer to Boss Man’s face slows him down and Snow chokes him with a chain. Snow moonsaults him through a table but Boss Man is up first. They head into the pool hall and Boss Man hits Dogg with a drink. Roadie comes back with a nightstick shot to give Snow the title in an abrupt ending.

Rating: C. This is one of the more famous hardcore matches and it’s pretty harmless goofy fun. The division was at its peak here but the 24/7 Rule was coming to make it a total parody. It was less than eight minutes so it’s hard to really complain about this one. Yeah it’s bad but it’s completely harmless for the most part.

Snow runs back across the street to check on Pepper but has to beat up Stevie Richards and Blue Meanie for some reason.

Jesse warns Mankind about using chairs and how it won’t be allowed, but Mankind would rather talk about Geraldine Ferraro’s electability.

Women’s Title: Ivory vs. Tori

Ivory is defending and Tori is just horrible for the most part. Ivory painted the word slut on Tori a few weeks ago to set this up. Tori charges in and hits a powerslam for two and it’s time for a breather. The crowd is already dead for this and a back elbow gets two for the champion. Tori hits a pair of suplexes and some lame kicks for two. Ivory is loudly calling spots to keep Tori from screwing everything up. The fans chant TAKE IT OFF as Ivory hooks a big swing. Tori comes back with a horrible spear and a middle rope cross body for two. They horribly botch a sunset flip so they do it again with Ivory sitting on Tori for the pin.

Rating: F+. Tori looked good in a bra and tight pants and that’s about it. Seriously, she was TERRIBLE and makes the modern Divas look like ring generals. Ivory was trying out there but she was hardly a miracle worker. Trish would debut soon but wouldn’t get good for about four more years.

Post match Ivory tries to take Tori’s top off but Luna Vachon makes the save, becoming the heel of the segment.

Rock verbally massacres Michael Cole by insulting his tie and implying Cole is a bit coome ci coom ca. Not that it matters as Rock is going to destroy Billy Gunn tonight. This was a bad time for Rock as he had a bunch of nothing feuds until he got back into the title hunt to close out the year.

Billy Gunn has a surprise under a tarp.

We recap Steve Blackman vs. Ken Shamrock. Blackman is recently back from an injury and they’ve been beating each other up for weeks. The result is another Lion’s Den match with weapons hanging from the cage. JR and King do the narration here for some reason.

Ken Shamrock vs. Steve Blackman

This is in the Lion’s Den which is that small cage which is NOT ripping off UFC. Not at all. You win by escape only. Blackman starts with the nunchucks but Shamrock comes back with profanity. Blackman chokes him down but gets caught in an armbar. Ken throws the nunchucks away and rams Blackman into the cage. Shamrock pounds Blackman down and whips him into the cage for a high kick to the head.

Blackman blocks a kendo stick shot and fires off kicks of his own before sending Ken into the cage. An atomic drop puts Shamrock down again and Blackman pounds him in the back with his martial arts sticks. Shamrock gets up and runs the cage wall to ram into Blackman with a kind of elbow to the face. A belly to back suplex puts Blackman down but Ken can’t quite follow up.

Back up and Blackman hits a quick DDT but Shamrock snaps off a powerslam. An enziguri puts Ken down and Steve pounds away with a kendo stick. A big shot to the head puts Ken down but he comes back with a wicked belly to belly to take over. Ken hits Blackman in the head (shoulder) with the stick….and that’s it. No reason is given but I’d assume a knockout, even though the announcers said you had to leave to win.

Rating: D+. This didn’t do anything for me. It was basically a hardcore match in a confined area which isn’t the most interesting thing in the world. It’s a far cry from last year’s version with Owen keeping up with Shamrock every step of the way. Granted this is Steve Blackman, a black hole of charisma instead of one of the best of all time. Nothing to see here but it wasn’t horrible.

We see Shane attacking Test earlier today.

Test says this is serious tonight.

Test vs. Shane McMahon

This is a Greenwich street fight with love her or leave her rules. Test is dating Stephanie but Shane doesn’t approve. If Test wins, Shane stays out of their lives but if Shane wins then the relationship ends. Test has bad ribs but Shane has no backup due to Test injuring every member of the Mean Street Posse. Scratch that theory actually as they come walking out before the match. Thanks for wasting my time on the video of Test destroying all of them. The Posse has a couch set for them in the front row.

Test takes Shane down to start but Shane hits a quick spear back inside, only to be pounded in the corner. A backdrop puts Shane down as the Posse drinks champagne. Shane is sent HARD into the steps and then into the crowd for a drink to the head. Test catches Shane diving off the barricade and powerslams him down onto the floor. Shane staggers around ringside so Test launches him at the Posse to tip the couch over.

The injured Posse goes after Test and give Shane a mailbox of all things to crack over Test’s head. A street sign stuns Test again and there’s a framed portrait of the Posse shattered over Test’s head. That’s only good for two and the fans are getting into this. Shane does a great looking leapfrog and this a jumping back elbow to the face to put Test down. A corkscrew senton (Spiral Tap) of all things misses and Test comes back with right hands.

Another leapfrog is countered into a sweet powerbomb but Rodney of the Posse distracts the referee. Test’s big boot hits the referee but he clotheslines Shane to the floor. The street sign puts Shane down again but here’s the Posse again to take Test down. They load him onto the announce table so Shane can hit the top rope elbow through Test. For a non-wrestler, Shane can drop a gorgeous elbow.

The referee is back up (why did he need to be bumped? It’s a street fight) but Test kicks out at two. The fans are really getting into this. Pete accidentally hits Shane with a sign but Rodney hits Test with his cast. That’s only good for two and now the fans are fired up. Patterson and Brisco run out to take care of the Posse and make it one on one. Shane charges into the post and it’s a pumphandle slam followed by the flying elbow to get Shane out of Test and Stephanie’s lives.

Rating: B. This took a little bit to get going but the fans got into it at the end. It’s a great example of a story carrying a match rather than the wild brawling. This was full of weapon shots and interference, but the story behind the match made people care about it. The people were invested in Test and wanted to see him fight for the woman he loved. That’s a classic story and it’s going to work every time. Good stuff here.

Stephanie comes out to celebrate post match.

We recap the tag title match. With Vince having been revealed as the Higher Power, Undertaker has been dropped down to an evil tag team with Big Show. They’re challenging X-Pac and Kane, who are in the beginning of a nearly year long story. Pac is Kane’s first real friend and the other monsters hurt him, so Kane wants revenge.

Tag Titles: Kane/X-Pac vs. Big Show/Undertaker

Kane is in the always awesome inverted attire, meaning it’s more black than red. The mash-up of Big Show and Undertaker’s themes really doesn’t work at all. It’s a big brawl to start with Undertaker easily knocking X-Pac to the floor. Kane gets double teamed in the corner but he clotheslines Big Show out to the floor and Pac gets two off a high cross body to Taker. We start with X-Pac against Taker with the big man cranking on the arm. Pac escapes and wisely tags out to give us brother vs. brother.

Taker is knocked to the floor and Pac dives off the apron to take him down. The crotch chop earned X-Pac an elbow to the face and a smile from me. Kane saves him little buddy and take Undertaker down with the top rope clothesline. Taker comes right back with his running DDT but Kane is up almost immediately. Big Show comes in to throw Kane around and drops him with a superkick.

Since this is a battle of the giants it’s time for some choking but we’re not to the bearhug yet. A powerslam gets two on Kane and it’s back to Undertaker to pound away in the corner. They slug it out and both guys go down with a double clothesline. The hot tag brings in X-Pac who catches Undertaker with a spinwheel kick (actually connects) but Big Show pulls the small man down. Everything breaks down and Pac is crotched against the post. Show slams Pac down and drops a knee to his chest. The size difference is remarkable when you see them next to each other.

There’s the bearhug but X-Pac bites his way out of it. A cross between a chokeslam and the Boss Man Slam gets two for Show but Kane breaks up the chokeslam. X-Pac hits Show low and it’s off to Kane to clean house. Everything breaks down again and X-Pac sends Taker into the post. There’s a Bronco Buster to Big Show but he pops up and chokeslams X-Pac down…..for two? Taker is MAD and goes after X-Pac in the corner before ending him with a tombstone for the titles.

Rating: D. This didn’t do it for me at all. I couldn’t stand X-Pac around this time and this is a great example of why. The whole idea of his character at this point was he wouldn’t give up, which led to him beating a lot of guys FAR bigger than him. I don’t have much of a problem with X-Pac against smaller guys, but when he’s beating people Taker’s size it was very annoying. The match was an extended squash.

Jesse gives Austin the same speech.

Billy Gunn vs. The Rock

The loser has to, shall we say, kiss up to the winner. Billy brings a fat chick with him for Rock to kiss if Rock loses. Gunn jumps him to start but Rock comes back with right hands of his own to send Gunn to the floor. They head up the aisle with Billy being sent into a metal barricade. Rock is sent into it as well and clotheslined down as Billy takes over. Rock comes back with a clothesline of his own as they fight by the Lion’s Den. This is really dull stuff so far.

They head back to ringside with Gunn sending him into the steps but being rammed face first into the announce table. Rock puts the King’s crown on Billy’s head for a right hand. Back in and Billy chokes away before getting two off a neckbreaker. Gunn drops an elbow to the chest and gets two off a bulldog.

A Stinger Splash crushes Rock but he explodes out of the corner with a running clothesline. The floatover DDT takes Gunn down but Rock can’t follow up. Rock gets two off a swinging neckbreaker and a Samoan Drop but the Rock Bottom is countered into a Fameasser. The fat woman comes into the ring but Billy goes face first into her. Rock Bottom and People’s Elbow ends this a second later.

Rating: D+. What were you expecting here? Like I said, Rock was in a funk at this point and going from lame feud to lame feud with nothing for him to work with. I mean, BILLY GUNN is the best they can do for him at Summerslam? The match wasn’t terrible but it was just killing time until the very obvious ending.

We recap the main event. Chyna actually won a #1 contenders triple threat over Undertaker and HHH but HHH went on a power trip, saying it was his shot. Mankind cost HHH a one on one match against Chyna for the shot and then beat Chyna for the title shot himself. HHH attacked Mankind’s leg, leading to a fourth #1 contenders match, resulting in a double pin and a threeway tonight.

Jesse comes out first and says he’s proud to be a wrestler. Here here!

WWF World Title: Steve Austin vs. Mankind vs. Triple H

Triple H and Austin start fast in the ring but Mankind pulls HHH to the floor and sends him onto the announce table. All three head into the ring with HHH being ping ponged back and forth by right hands from both guys. Mankind offers Austin a handshake but gets punched in the face instead. HHH is knocked to the floor and Mankind misses a charge at Austin to send him to the outside as well.

All three are on the floor now with no one having a clear advantage. Austin clotheslines Mankind down before slugging it out with HHH, allowing Chyna (HHH’s manager) to send Mankind into the post. Jesse tries to separate Chyna and Mankind as HHH hits Austin’s bad knee with a chair. Ventura asks the crowd if HHH hit Steve with a chair but doesn’t do anything about it once they say yes. Mankind is back in now but gets pounded down in the corner by HHH.

A quick Mandible Claw slows HHH down but Chyna breaks it up by crotching Mankind on the post. That earns her an ejection and a lecture from Ventura. Austin is back up now and pounding away on HHH in the aisle. They fight back to ringside where Austin’s bad knee is wrapped around the post. A chop block puts Austin down but Mankind is getting back up again. He breaks up a stomping from HHH to Austin, only so he can stomp Austin instead. Now they stomp Austin together to a loud chorus of boos.

HHH puts on a spinning toe hold but breaks up a cover attempt by Mankind, starting a fight between the two of them. HHH is knocked to the floor but Mankind misses a dive off the apron. Austin’s knee is almost wrapped around the post again but Mankind intercept it and brawls with HHH into the crowd. A piledriver on the concrete is broken up and Austin fights HHH again. Everyone heads back inside and there’s a low blow from Austin to HHH.

The Stunner takes down Mankind but HHH breaks it up with a chair shot. Ventura yells at HHH about it before HHH knocks Mankind out with the chair as well. HHH covers Mankind but Jesse isn’t counting a cover off an illegal move like that. Shane runs in to plead HHH’s case but gets Stunned for his efforts. Ventura throws Shane out but HHH and Steve clothesline each other down. Mankind loads up Socko and both guys get a mouthful of it but Austin kicks Mankind low to break it up.

HHH loads up the Pedigree on Mankind but Austin clotheslines HHH down to break it up. Austin punches both of his challengers and hits a Stunner on HHH but Mankind breaks up the count at two. Austin sends Mankind into the post but walks into the Pedigree. Mankind pops back up though and knocks HHH down before hitting the double arm DDT on Austin for the pin and the title in a surprise.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t all that great of a match. At the end of the day it was a pretty slow paced brawl and HHH wasn’t on this level yet. Still though, it wasn’t terrible and Jesse added some good moments to the match. This wouldn’t wind up meaning much for reasons I’ll get into in a bit. It’s a nice moment though.

Post match HHH destroys Austin and his knee with a chair, putting him on the shelf for a month.

Overall Rating: D+. This show is a product of the times and political issues kept it from having the big moment it was looking for. HHH was scheduled to win the title to end the show but Jesse didn’t want to raise a heel’s hand to end the show. The title change would take place the next night on Raw and HHH would have his first title defense on a new show called Smackdown later this week. The show is totally forgettable though with only the street fight and the main event being notable at all. Not worth seeing but there are worse shows.

Ratings Comparison

Jeff Jarrett vs. D’Lo Brown

Original: B-

Redo: C+

Tag Team Turmoil

Original: B-

Redo: C-

Big Boss Man vs. Al Snow

Original: B

Redo: C

Ivory vs. Tori

Original: F

Redo: F+

Ken Shamrock vs. Steve Blackman

Original: B-

Redo: D+

Shane McMahon vs. Test

Original: B

Redo: B

Unholy Alliance vs. X-Pac/Kane

Original: D+

Redo: D

Billy Gunn vs. The Rock

Original: B-

Redo: D+

HHH vs. Steve Austin vs. Mankind

Original: B+

Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: D+

WOW and I thought 1990 was screwed up.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/03/history-of-summerslam-count-up-1999-the-body/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

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