Smackdown – January 3, 2014: An Acceptable Use Of Two Hours

Smackdown
Date: January 3, 2014
Location: Verizon Center, Washington D.C.
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re coming up on the Rumble and there are two major stories coming out of Monday: the return of Brock Lesnar and Daniel Bryan joining the Wyatts. The main reaction seems to be that Bryan joining is a slap in the fans’ face and I’m not sure where this idea is coming from. The first thing I thought when he agreed to join was that it was a plan by Bryan to infiltrate the Family and take them apart from the inside. I can’t imagine this doesn’t end with anything other than Bryan doing something to cost the Wyatts big, setting up a showdown between Bray and Daniel, perhaps in the Rumble? Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the end of Raw with Bryan turning his back on the fans and joining the Family.

Here’s the Shield in the ring to open the show. Ambrose says they’ve heard all the stories about the Shield crumbling from within and that some egos (with an arm around Reigns) are out of control. All of those rumors are dead wrong and if CM Punk thinks he can take down the Shield he’s in for a surprise. Reigns thinks the weak link in the team is obvious (with a look over at Ambrose): there isn’t a weak link. Rollins says the setbacks are temporary because the Shield will come together and dominate WWE.

Shield vs. Usos

Ambrose is the odd man out and sits in on commentary. Reigns gets things going with Jimmy and headbutts him in the corner. Jimmy gets taken down to the mat and stomped by Roman before it’s off to Seth who walks into a clothesline. Off to Jey for the first time and a back elbow to the jaw for two. The Usos get two more off a double elbow drop as Ambrose talks about taking over the WWE and closing down every bar and saloon from Dallas to Singapore. I miss wrestlers implying that they associate with each other off television.

Jimmy gets two off a backdrop before it’s back to Jey for an armdrag into an armbar. An uppercut stops Seth’s comeback and a clothesline puts him on the floor. The Usos hit stereo kicks to Reigns’ ribs to send him outside before backdropping Rollins on top of him. We take a break and come back with Jey holding Rollins in a chickenwing before Seth takes him into the corner for a tag to Reigns.

Roman takes Jey down with an elbow to the jaw as Shield takes over. Seth comes back in off the top with a right hand to the ribs. The announcers actually talk about unifying the midcard titles, meaning it might be a real possibility at the moment. Cole asks Ambrose if he’d like to face Langston. Ambrose, partially in song no less, says no and asks Cole to stop bullying him and “BE A STAR.” Can we just get Punk and Ambrose to do commentary on random matches? I’d buy the Network for that alone.

Off to a cobra clutch by Rollins before Reigns comes back in to bend Jey’s arm around the rope. Ambrose keeps spinning around in his chair at commentary. Reigns misses a charge and falls out to the floor. Seth can’t make a diving save so Jey makes the hot tag off to Jimmy. Everything breaks down and Rollins gets Samoan dropped but rolls to the floor before the Umaga attack can connect. Reigns is sent outside as well but Ambrose runs in for the DQ at 9:03 shown of 12:03.

Rating: C+. These teams are reaching the point where they could have good matches in their sleep. The Usos are becoming the Kofi Kingstons of the tag division as you’re guaranteed a good match but they’re never going to go anywhere beyond where they are now. Hopefully they can break that mold and eventually get the titles that they’re long overdue to win.

Before Shield can get far in their triple team, CM Punk comes out for the save.

Throughout the night we’re going to get New Year’s Resolutions from Superstars. Up first are the Prime Time Players who want to use their talents to do more good and…..get a macaroni recipe?

Vickie, six man tag, etc.

Fandango vs. R-Truth

Xavier gets in on commentary as Fandango pounds Truth into the corner. Truth does his backflip to the middle of the ring and hiptosses Fandango down. Woods brags about getting a PHD and being the only man in history to be a doctor and work for WWE. JBL: “What about Dr. Jerry Graham and Dr. Tom Pritchard?”

Woods sums up the connection between he and Truth: they’re friends and Truth got him into wrestling. Works for me. Fandango comes back with a quick spinwheel kick to the jaw for two and we hit the reverse chinlock. Truth fires off right hands but runs into a boot. Woods calls out the Funkadactyls and gets on the table (wearing JBL’s hat) to dance. The distraction lets Truth hit Little Jimmy for the pin at 2:52. Have we reached the point where the distraction is someone’s official set up move? Also shouldn’t that be considered a heel move?

Dancing ensues.

Video on Tribute to the Troops.

Big E. Langston talks about Brock destroying his friend on Monday and says he wouldn’t want to be Brock Lesnar right now. Curtis Axel comes in and says he’s sorry for what happened to Mark but he’ll be laughing all the way to the bank after beating Langston tonight. Big E. says no one will be laughing after the match.

Video on Bryan joining the Wyatts on Monday.

Tag Titles: Goldust/Cody Rhodes vs. Wyatt Family

Cody and Goldust are defending but there’s no Bray and/or Bryan. Goldust and Harper get things going with Luke driving him into the corner. The crowd is very quiet tonight for some reason. Harper is taken into the corner and a double suplex gets a one count for Luke. Back to Goldust who gets fingers in his eyes before it’s off to Rowan. The monsters make some quick tags to take over on Goldust but he comes back with right hands in the corner.

Rowan is knocked to the apron but Luke clotheslines Goldust down and puts on a chinlock. Goldust fights up and gets a quick two off a sunset flip. The hot tag (kind of as the crowd is still barely responding at all) brings in Cody for a knee lift and the Disaster Kick to send Harper to the floor. Cody follows him out but gets sent into the barricade and steps as we take a break.

Back with Rowan firing off more right hands put Cody down as we look at the empty rocking chair. Back to Harper for a running elbow in the corner to knock Cody down again. There’s the Gator Roll followed by another chinlock but Harper lets go of the hold to knock Goldust off the apron.

Rowan comes back in but gets sent to the floor, only to have Harper knock Goldust down again. A BIG sitout powerbomb gets two on Cody as Goldust makes the save. Everything breaks down and Harper kicks Cody in the face to knock him silly. Cody breaks up what looks like a belly to back superplex and hits the moonsault to a standing Harper. Goldust makes a blind tag and grabs an O’Connor roll for the pin on Rowan at 12:25.

Rating: B. I’m more and more impressed by Goldust and Cody every time they go out there. There’s that natural chemistry that you get with brothers that you just can’t teach and it’s taking these guys to another level. The Wyatts get better in the ring with every match they have as well with Rowan more than holding up his end of the team.

Miz’s resolution is to be awesome.

Nikki Bella vs. Aksana

This is fallout from Aksana pinning Nikki on Monday in the ten Diva tag. They shove each other to start until Nikki hiptosses her down and drives shoulders in the corner. Aksana rolls outside and grabs Nikki’s arm to slam it into the post. The announcers are comparing Aksana to Hannibal Lecter for some reason as she gets two off a side slam. Off to an arm lock on Nikki but she fights back with clotheslines and dropkicks. Aksana comes back with a kick to the ribs and forearms in the corner, only to get Racked. Nikki drops to her knees (that move HAS to be a rib somehow) into a backbreaker for the pin at 4:00.

Rating: D. The girls both look good in tight outfits but they have no business in the ring. If nothing else this makes Brie look that much better as she’s miles ahead of Nikki as far as wrestling skills go. Aksana is there as eye candy, which makes me wonder why they had get the pin on Monday.

We get the video package on Orton’s career from Raw.

Big E. Langston vs. Curtis Axel

Non-title. Axel gets in some right hands to start but gets his head taken off by a clothesline. Big E. charges into a boot in the corner but knocks Axel out of the air with a shoulder block for two. Curtis comes back with some right hands and knee drops before hooking an armbar. Langston pops up and hits a quick belly to belly followed by the Warrior Splash. Axel escapes the Big Ending and snaps Langston’s throat across the top rope but walks into the Big Ending for the pin at 3:55.

Rating: D+. This was just a step above a squash for Langston and there’s nothing wrong with that. He needs to keep racking up wins like this to make him feel like an unstoppable force before someone knocks him off for the title so Big E. can move to the main event. It worked for Warrior and it can work for Langston.

The Raw ReBound looks at Lesnar destroying Mark Henry.

We get a sitdown interview with Heyman who says Brock is back because there’s one WWE Champion. Brock wants to be the one and only champion and it doesn’t matter who comes out of the Rumble with the title. Heyman says Brock is looking to do something Old School next week, meaning he’ll be on Raw.

Time for Bad News Barrett with his nifty rising podium. The bad news tonight: no one is going to keep their new year’s resolutions so this time next year, everyone will be just as fat, unhealthy and unproductive as they are now.

CM Punk/Usos vs. Shield

Ambrose and Punk get us going with CM being driven into the corner, only to have Punk whip him over to the other Shield members. Off to Rollins who grabs a hammerlock but Punk counters into a headlock so he can loudly shout spots in Rollins’ ear. A neckbreaker puts Seth down for two and it’s off to Jey for a running headbutt. He puts Seth in a Boston crab as the now legal Jimmy drops a leg on the back of Seth’s head.

A leg lariat puts Seth down and it’s back to Jey for a superkick to the chest. Ambrose is sent to the floor but Reigns blocks a big dive from Jey as we take a break. Back with Reigns driving a headbutt into Jimmy’s chest and getting two off the Superman Punch. Rollins comes in with a backsplash for two and we hit the neck crank. Seth goes up but gets crotched down, only to have Ambrose come in to break up the hot tag attempt.

Jimmy breaks a chinlock with a jawbreaker and elbows his way out of a belly to back superplex attempt. Reigns comes in with Jimmy still on the top and gets taken down by a top rope cross body. Rollins knocks Jey off the apron but can’t stop the tag to Punk. CM comes in with a springboard clothesline and the running knee in the corner. Ambrose distracts Punk from dropping the Macho Elbow and Rollins crotches him on the top.

Punk rolls through a crossbody to put Rollins in the Anaconda Vice but Reigns makes the save. Another Superman Punch puts Jey down and we get down to the legal Punk vs. Rollins. Seth crawls over and tags in Dean who hits a butterfly superplex on Punk for two. Punk comes back with a GTS attempt but drops him before Reigns can launch the spear. A double superkick drops Roman and Seth gets backdropped to the floor. The twins hit stereo dives and the GTS ends Ambrose at 13:48.

Rating: B-. Good stuff here as you would expect, even with Ambrose taking the fall again. I’m assuming they’re building up to Reigns calling Ambrose out for all of the losses but get the title off of him if that’s where they’re going. If nothing else Shield hasn’t turned into a joke and they’re potentially splitting while still having awesome matches.

A video from Bray Wyatt talking about Bryan needing the Family to be his home ends the show.

Overall Rating: C. They focused on the tag stuff again tonight but the taping schedule messed a few things up. It’s annoying that we have to wait for Monday for anything on Bryan but it’s better to do it on a big Raw than on a regular Smackdown anyway. This is another show that you didn’t need to see but it was a fine enough way to spend two hours.

Results

Usos b. Shield via DQ when Dean Ambrose interfered

R-Truth b. Fandango – Little Jimmy

Goldust/Cody Rhodes b. Wyatt Family – O’Connor roll to Rowan

Nikki Bella b. Aksana – Torture rack backbreaker

Big E. Langston b. Curtis Axel – Big Ending

CM Punk/Usos b. Shield – GTS to Ambrose

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Wrestler of the Day – January 2: Cody Rhodes and Goldust

I’m already having to stretch with this one as there’s no one video of anyone born on January 2. Therefore, today’s wrestlers are going to be the hottest second generation acts at the moment: Goldust and Cody Rhodes. We’ll start with the elder of the pair.

Goldust is the more famous incarnation of Dustin Rhodes who made his national debut for all intents and purposes at the 1991 Royal Rumble, joining his father Dusty in a tag match against Ted DiBiase and Virgil.

Ted Dibiase/Virgil vs. Dustin Rhodes/Dusty Rhodes

Dustin is BRAND new here as this is his first WWF match. It’s also Dusty’s last in the WWF/E for over fifteen years. This is the blowoff to DiBiase vs. Dusty which started at Summerslam with Ted buying Sapphire and taking her from Dusty. Sapphire left soon afterwards because she didn’t want to be away from Dusty. Anyway the Rhodes Family takes over to start with elbows a go-go, sending the heels to a huddle on the floor.

Dustin, only 21 here, starts with Virgil who barely ever wrestled at this point. I mean it was like once every year or two. Dustin hits a clothesline and a dropkick to send Virgil (the real name of Dusty for you trivia geeks) to the floor as DiBiase is getting frustrated. Another clothesline puts Virgil on the floor again and Ted yells a lot. Off to DiBiase to backdrop the young gun but a second attempt results in a face jam.

The Rhodes dudes hammer DiBiase back and forth with elbows to send him to the floor as well. Here’s Big Dust who puts on a sleeper but Virgil breaks it up. Back to Dustin for a dropkick for two, but a charging knee at Virgil misses to put Dustin down. Virgil stays on the knee and wraps it around the post, as does his boss. The heels try some double teaming, but Virgil accidentally clotheslines DiBiase. Ted beats the tar out of him, allowing Dustin to tag his dad. Said dad is rolled up for the pin almost immediately by DiBiase.

Rating: D+. Another dull match here but it was almost all for the ending and post match stuff. Like I said, the Rhodes guys were on their way out so they didn’t have a chance at all in this one. Dusty stopped meaning anything months before this and it was the right move to go back to WCW for him where he could do what he wanted and book as well.

That was it for the Rhodes Family in the WWF as they moved back to WCW almost immediately. Dustin would get a lot better over time and become known as the Natural. He would win the US Title in 1993 and defend it against Steve Austin at Starrcade 1993.

US Title: Steve Austin vs. Dustin Rhodes

 

The Natural” Rhodes is defending but Austin is rapidly becoming the character that would make him the legend that he was destined to be. He also has Colonel Robert Parker as his manager and this is 2/3 falls. Jesse entertains himself by making fun of the Hooters girl (“You can’t call her the Natural.”) as they fight on the mat for basic control. The champion puts on a headscissors but Austin quickly makes a rope. An elbow to the head puts Austin on the floor and we take a breather.

 

Rhodes pounds in knees to Steve’s arm but Austin rolls right back to the floor. Back in again with Dustin taking him down to the mat with a headlock. Austin fights up and kicks him in the ribs, only to be caught in a backslide for two. Austin bails right back to the floor as the match stops all over again. This time though Austin pulls him to the mat and hits an elbow on Dustin’s chest to take over.

 

Now Rhodes knocks Austin into the crowd before heading back inside. Steve looks very frustrated and a big right hand frustrates him even more. Back to the headlock because we haven’t spent enough time in that hold yet. Austin escapes and drops some knees, only to be popped in the jaw again. Rhodes is thrown to the floor but he comes back in with a sunset flip for two. A belly to back suplex puts the champion down and Austin gets a lazy two.

 

They ram heads and yet again we lay around. This has been another dull match in a series of them tonight. Back up and Rhodes hits an elbow to the head but Austin falls on top during a slam attempt, getting another near fall. Austin misses a middle rope knee drop and Dustin connects with a lariat. A powerslam gets two as Parker is up on the apron. Dustin throws Austin int Parker but Steve goes over the top, giving him the first fall in a DQ.

 

Austin is busted open and Parker has to be taken to the back after being attacked by Dustin. The second fall starts and there go the lights. Thankfully we have a spotlight ready as Dustin hits a suplex for no cover. They head to the corner with Rhodes pounding away and the lights are back. In a quick ending, Austin shoves him off the ropes and grabs the trunks for the pin, the second fall, and the title.

 

Rating: D. I’m getting tired of these lame matches. Austin and Rhodes are WAY too talented to have such a bad match, but the majority of this match was spent doing very basic stuff which had no excitement to it at all. There’s nothing to see here at all, as is the case with all of the matches so far tonight.

 

Dustin would eventually jump to the WWF again and would undergo one of the most radical changes in history. Instead of being the Natural, he would become a man in a gold suit with gold hair and covered in gold paint named Goldust. He was obsessed with the movies and quoted film nonstop. After doing little of note for a few months, he would challenge Razor Ramon for the Intercontinental Title at Royal Rumble 1996.

Intercontinental Title: Razor Ramon vs. Goldust

The yet to be named Marlena debuts with Goldie here. Razor is defending as is his custom. Feeling out process to start with Goldust playing his usual mind games, which means rubbing himself. Razor cranks on the arm before grabbing a headlock which goes nowhere. Goldust goes behind Razor and molests him a bit to psych Razor out even more. They head to the corner with Razor having his head rubbed a bit, ticking him off even more.

Razor goes for the arm so Goldust slaps him in the face. Perfect keeps making sex jokes as Razor slaps Goldust right back in the face. He spanks Goldie once as well, but the painted dude likes it. We head to the floor where Goldust hides behind Marlena as the stalling continues. Back in and Razor tries three straight headscissors before punching Goldust to the floor with a single shot.

We get more stalling which is called playing mind games before Ramon clotheslines him right back to the outside. Razor has to move Marlena out of the way, allowing Goldust to FINALLY do something, taking over with a shot to the ribs. Back in and Goldust focuses on the ribs, but not too much because that might mean we have some speed to this match. A bulldog gets two for Goldust as does a slingshot belly to back suplex.

Off to a sleeper, which Perfect suggests Goldust could use to do “whatever he wants” to Goldust. Much like everything else in the match, this goes on way too long until Razor fights up and kicks Goldust low. He’s so spent though that Goldie gets a two count, causing Razor to start his comeback. He fires off his usual punches and the chokeslam gets two. A belly to back superplex hit but Marlent distracts the referee, allowing the 1-2-3 Kid to come in and kick Razor’s head off. Goldust gets the easy pin and the title.

Rating: D-. Sweet freaking goodness this was dull. It went on WAY too long and had a bad ending on top of that, plus the stupid “psychology” from Goldust which wound up being more unpleasant than interesting or intelligent. Goldust would get WAY better when he became more of a comedy/parody character rather than this freaky dude that he was to start his WWF run. The matches got a lot better as a result too.

Goldust would stick around for years to come but would mainly be a midcarder who was strange in name only. We’re going to skip ahead to December of 2002 when Goldust was part of a very funny tag team with Booker T. This is from Armageddon 2002 in a four way tag team title match with Booker T/Goldust as one set of challengers.

Raw Tag Titles: Dudley Boys vs. Chris Jericho/Christian vs. Booker T/Goldust vs. Lance Storm/William Regal

The Canadians are champions and this is under elimination rules. The Dudleys are only 15 time tag champions here. They’re also recently reunited, having gotten back together at Survivor Series. The Dudleys and Unamericans (Regal/Storm) were pre-determined to start the match in a four way coin toss somehow. Storm and Bubba get us going here with Storm hammering away.

Ray channels the POWER OF AMERICA and beats down Storm with a corner splash and it’s off to Christian vs. D-Von. We get a rundown of the city structure of Dudleyville as Regal comes in now. Goldust vs. the British dude with the British dude hitting a suplex for no cover. Christian tagged himself in, ticking Regal off. Is there a reason why you would want to come in? I’d chill on the apron until it’s down to two teams.

Jericho comes in and is sent right back out again by Goldie. Back in Jericho reminds Goldust that he’s THE KING OF THE WORLD and it’s off to Christian as Goldie is in trouble. What’s Up to Christian as some Dudleys are here in case you didn’t get that one. Everything breaks down and we have Christian vs. D-Von left in the ring. 3D to Christian but Regal got a blind tag. After a weird confusion, Regal gets two on Ray (illegal man) but it’s called a pin anyway. Five seconds later Goldust gets a powerslam (seriously?) to Regal to get us down to two teams. That was an incredibly confusing sequence.

Ok so it’s Christian/Jericho vs. Booker/Goldust. The good guys (Booker/Goldust) hammer on Jericho with Booker being legal. Hook kick gets two for Booker and it’s off to the armbar. Christian is down on the floor I guess. Maybe he’s off finding a good deal on Turtle Wax. Either way he’s not in the corner but he pops up in time to break up a pin attempt on Jericho.

Off to Christian who avoids a forearm, sending Goldust to the floor. Jericho gets a British flag to Goldust’s back to take over again. Back in Christian gets an abdominal stretch and a chant saying he sucks. Jericho comes in and goes down quickly but Christian makes a nice save to break up the tag. I would have thought that would have worked. In a surprising moment, Goldust wakes up and beats the champions down with ease. Ross calls a chokeslam (kind of) a sidewalk slam. Ok then.

Off to Booker who gets the Jack Brisco sunset flip out of the corner for two. He hammers on Jericho but the falling sleeper (looked awful) takes down Booker for two. Here come the Walls but Jericho gets rolled up for two. Axe kick misses and there are the Walls. Goldie pops up out of nowhere and hits a bulldog to take Jericho down.

A belt shot by Christian doesn’t work and a missile dropkick gets two on Jericho. Lionsault misses so Booker stops for the Spinarooni. Axe kick gets two and everything breaks down again. Belt shot and Lionsault get two on Booker and Jericho is ticked. So ticked that he walks into the Bookend and we’re done with new comedic champions.

Rating: B-. Pretty fun match here as they sped through the first two eliminations so we could get to the two top teams. Goldie and Booker were funny but they lost the titles in like three weeks to the Unamericans. They knew how to have a fast paced tag match out there and the whole thing worked rather well. This was somehow almost 17 minutes long and it feels like about seven, which is a great thing.

The new champions would lose the titles a month later and Goldust would become little more than a jobber. He went to TNA for a few years and was a monster named Black Reign before pretty much fading away. Finally in 2013 he was brought back as part of a storyline war between the Rhodes and McMahon families, culminating in a tag match at Battleground where he teamed with his brother Cody against the Shield for the Rhodes Family’s jobs.

Cody Rhodes/Goldust vs. Seth Rollins/Roman Reigns

If the Rhodes Family wins, they get their jobs back. If Shield wins, Cody and Goldust are gone forever and Dusty loses his job too. This is also non-title. Dusty is at ringside to counter act Dean Ambrose and Goldust looks like Darth Maul. Cody pounds away on Seth to start and it’s quickly off to Roman who gets pounded down in the corner. Shield bails to the floor and stalks Dusty, setting up a cool looking six man standoff with the brothers protecting their dad.

Back in and Roman knees Cody down as the champions take over. Seth comes in but walks into an elbow to the jaw and a stomping in the corner. Rollins sends him into the buckle to escape and it’s off to Roman for some power. After an easy pounding it’s quickly back to Rollins to crank on the shoulder a bit. Cody gets caught in the Tree of Woe but frees up a leg to kick Seth down. The moonsault press hits Rollins perfectly and the hot tag brings in Goldust.

An atomic drop slows Reigns down and Goldust pounds him down in the corner. Goldust hits a spinning cross body off the top for two but misses a regular cross body, sending him out to the floor. Goldie dives back in at nine but gets caught in a body scissors from Rollins. Back to Reigns for a good looking clothesline for two before it’s back to Rollins who gets the same off a hilo. Goldust comes back by avoiding a dropkick and powerslamming Seth down.
There’s the hot tag off to Cody for an Alabama Slam to Rollins for a very near fall. Something like a Muscle Buster gets two on Rollins and everything breaks down. The Disaster Kick staggers Reigns and Cody clotheslines him to the floor but an Ambrose distraction allows Seth to come back in for the save. Dusty elbows Ambrose down and Seth rolls up Cody for two. Rhodes comes pops back up and hits Cross Rhodes for the pin at 13:55.

Rating: B. This was ALL about emotion coming in but the match was good stuff on top of that. Again, this match worked because we were given a reason to care about the underdogs and wanted to see them win instead of being told we wanted to see them win. That’s how you make a good story and it worked perfectly well here.

That brings us to Cody Rhodes, who is far different from his dad and brother but still very talented. We’ll start with his time down in OVW as he teams up with CM Punk to face Jay Bradley (occasionally seen in TNA) and Shawn Spears who appeared in WWECW a few times. I’m not 100% sure on the date here but I’m pretty sure it’s June 23, 2007.

Cody Runnels/CM Punk vs. Shawn Spears/Jay Bradley

Bradley is OVW Champion and Spears is TV Champion. Cody has half polka dot half goldu trunks to honor his family. If Punk and Cody (the good guys here) win, Cody gets Spears in a strap match this coming week and Punk gets a title match with Bradley next week on TV. Cody decks Bradley in the face with a string of forearms but keeps looking over at Spears. Bradley catches him in a fallaway slam and it’s off to Spears who immediately runs to the floor.

It’s back to Bradley who runs from Punk and tags Spears back in. Cody gets an immediate tag to send Spears running again but Bradley makes another save. Bradley hits Cody with some forearms to the back and like a good heel, Spears finally comes in when Cody is down. Cody shrugs off everything Spears has to throw at him, sending Shawn to the corner for another tag. Announcer Dean Hill talks about Spears and Cody being former partner until Spears turned on him. Simple but effective story.

Bradley puts Cody in a chinlock and drags him to the corner for another tag off to Shawn. Spears plays a nice cocky heel until Cody punches him in the face. Punk comes in sans tag but only gets his partner in more trouble. The heels stay in control until Spears ducks his head and gets punched in the face. Cody FINALLY makes the tag off to Punk and everything breaks down, sending the heels running off for the countout.

Rating: C-. This was about setting up stuff for later and there’s nothing wrong with that. Cody had the look and some natural skills but he needed a lot of seasoning at this point. Punk was barely in the match at all but he was just a special attraction in OVW here. Cody would win the title in just a few days.

Post match Cody pulls out a strap and cleans house on everyone that comes from the locker room to help the heels.

Cody would debut on Raw less than a month later. He would go on to feud with Hardcore Holly and eventually get a tag team title shot at the Raw 15th Anniversary special on December 10, 2007.

Raw Tag Titles: Hardcore Holly/Cody Rhodes vs. Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch

Dusty is out here too so you know this is going to be a title change. Cody’s team is challenging. Cade and Cody start us off as Dusty is at home talking a lot. He really was good at what he did and the one biggest thing about him: you can never say he was boring. He paid attention and had insight about EVERYTHING. Cody is very much a rookie here and after he gets beaten up for awhile it’s a double tag and Holly cleans house. Everything breaks down and the Alabama Slam gives Rhodes and Holly the titles. Dusty comes in to celebrate with them.

They would hold the titles for over seven months despite few people seeming interested. Cody would turn heel and join up with Randy Orton and Ted DiBiase Jr. as part of Legacy. The trio would dominate Raw for a good while and eventually feud with DX, leading to a submissions only match at Breaking Point.

DX vs. Legacy

This is submissions count anywhere. We get the obligatory Montreal reference from DX which makes sense as we’re in Montreal tonight. HHH says it was all Shawn’s fault in a rather funny bit. There are in essence no rules in this to speak of. Shawn is famous for the figure four? Since when? We’re already into the crowd so at least they’re not trying that hard to make this look like a normal match. That’s always a perk.

Shawn has DiBiase in a choke on a railing in the audience and HHH and Rhodes are back in the concourse I think. We were in the ring for all of 8 seconds in case you were wondering. They’re brawling all over the place but of course we’re heading back to the ring now. Rhodes is put onto a chair and HHH gets a Boston Crab at the same time that Shawn gets a camel clutch. Good to know. After that is broken up we get a crossface from HHH.

I’m not sure if this is a good match or not. Rhodes hooks a Gory Special of all things. The formula of this match more of less is one guy puts a hold on another and the partner makes the save. It’s ok but there’s not much to it really. HHH and DiBiase are in the ring and Rhodes and Shawn are fighting in the production area. They fight into the stands and Shawn falls from there down to a perfectly placed empty area.

Basically HHH has to fight both guys off to keep them away from Shawn. Hmm…HHH having to face very big odds and do something no other normal person could pull off? Where’s the challenge? They’re in the back and beating the heck out of HHH. The crowd reaction would suggest Shawn is up. Oh wait it’s Montreal so maybe he died or something. Never mind. He’s up. It’s back to 1-2 now though as HHH got smacked in the head and is down.

Rhodes busts out an ankle lock on Shawn. You know, the guy with a bad back that just hurt his back a few minutes ago. I can’t stand stupid wrestlers at times. So Shawn was down for maybe two minutes from FALLING OFF A BALCONY and HHH is down much longer from a garbage can shot? Good freaking night.

Shawn gets that reverse figure four that he used like twice but he’s a master off all of a sudden anyway. Rhodes just goes off on Shawn and hooks the figure four on the post. DiBiase adds in the Million Dollar Dream. And Shawn taps out with HHH crawling on the floor. Talk about an EPIC win. Match kind of sucked but kind of didn’t.

Rating: B-. I liked it, but there were a LOT of problems here. For one thing, it got to the point where it was just the same stuff happening but with different people. That’s rather boring indeed. However, VERY happy that Legacy won as they actually needed a win as opposed to DX all over again. It was good but far from great. I’ll give it the benefit of the doubt though.

Once Legacy broke up, Cody eventually became obsessed with his looks and going by the name Dashing Cody Rhodes. He would offer tips on self-grooming and stuff like candles while still putting on good matches. Eventually he would have his face injured in a match against Rey Mysterio and wear a mask that made him look like Dr. Doom from Marvel Comics. The interesting aspect of the character was that Cody’s face looked exactly the same but in his head he was convinced he was hideous. This led to a match with Mysterio at Wrestlemania 27.

 

Cody Rhodes vs. Rey Mysterio

Cody used to be Dashing but then Rey hit him with the 619 and the knee brace hit Cody in the face, scarring him and requiring facial surgery. Cody basically became Dr. Doom but in reality his face was fine. However he wanted Rey’s mask for retribution. This was an AWESOME character but of course WWE would wind up wasting the entire thing and make Cody a jobber because they got bored with him after a few months. Still though, this part was awesome.

Oh yeah the match. Rey comes out as Captain America this year which is an awesome looking costume for him. Rey is almost immediately sent to the apron but comes in off the top with a dropkick to take over. A forearm to Rey’s face takes over and Cody goes after the knee brace which caused the initial injury. Rey kicks his way out of the corner but Cody headbutts him in the face to take over again because of the hard mask.

The Disaster Kick to the head puts Rey down again and it’s off to a chinlock. Cody charges into a boot in the corner but comes right back with the Alabama Slam for two. Back to the knee brace for a second before Cody hits a running knee to the back of Rey’s head to keep him down. Mysterio is sent to the apron again and goes up top, only to be sent down in a delayed superplex. Cody stomps away and talks about how Rey hurt his face.

Rey escapes Cross Rhodes and sends Cody out to the floor for a baseball slide to the face. A headscissors sends Cody into the apron and we head back inside to speed things up. Rey hooks a quick quick rollup for two and fires off a kick to the face. Cody charges into a kick to the ribs but comes back with a release German suplex for two. A springboard headscissors puts Cody down but the 619 is caught in mid kick. Cody slingshots Rey’s throat into the middle rope for two more and now the knee brace is removed.

Rey comes right back with a moonsault press for two of his own and Cody loses his mask. The 619 hits and a hard kick to Cody’s head gets two more. Now Mysterio puts Cody’s mask on and hits a few headbutts with it before hitting a top rope headbutt to the chest for two. Cody rolls to the floor and sneaks in a shot to the face with the knee brace, followed up by Cross Rhodes for the upset pin.

Rating: B-. Good match here and pretty easily Cody’s biggest win ever to this point. Cody needed this win a lot more than Mysterio and it made him even more awesome than he already was before this match. Mysterio had nothing to gain here and it was a pleasant sight to see the hotter star go over like that.

 

Cody would go on to win the Intercontinental Title and hold it for several months. After losing it for the second time, things would go down in a hurry for Rhodes as he would be stuck in midcard and tag team feuds that went nowhere. It wouldn’t be until Fall of 2013 when Cody got a match with WWE Champion Randy Orton for his job that he would show the potential he had again.

 

Cody Rhodes vs. Randy Orton

 

If Cody loses he’s gone. Orton pounds away in the corner to start and takes him down with a clothesline. Rhodes is draped over the top rope and sent out to the floor, but he sends Randy into the steps for a breather. Cody cranks on the arm and gets two off a dropkick before pounding away in the corner. Orton gets choked on the ropes but comes back with a poke to the eye for two. More right hands have Randy in control but Cody comes back with a release front suplex and right hands of his own in the corner. Orton hits the backbreaker out of said corner to send Cody to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Orton throwing Cody back inside for two but Cody comes back with an elbow to the jaw and an uppercut to put Rhodes down. A springboard missile dropkick gets a close two and the Disaster Kick gets the same. Orton sidesteps the moonsault press and puts Cody down with the Elevated DDT. The RKO is countered into the Cross Rhodes out of nowhere for a VERY close two. I thought that was it. The fans are WAY into Cody here but Orton snaps his throat across the top rope. Back in and Rhodes gets two off a rollup but another Disaster Kick misses and the RKO connects for the pin at 13:35.

Rating: B. When you have me believing that Cody Rhodes could beat Randy Orton, you’re doing something right. I’m not sure where they’re going to go with Cody now as he got a good rub here but apparently he’s gone for a bit due to the loss. Either they’re going back on what they said or he’s really taking time off for some reason. Still though, good match here.

 

Overall, the Rhodes children are the polar opposite of their dad. Dusty was all about promos and usually couldn’t have a good match if his life depended on it. Cody and Goldust can both talk but are much more athletic in the ring. At this point Goldust is having one of the best career comebacks you’ll ever see while Cody could be an upper midcard fixture for years to come.

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2013 Awards: Feud of the Year

My pick surprised me here.This is a hard one to pick as almost nothing stood head and shoulders above everything else this year.  I’ll eliminate Bryan vs. Orton as the multiple screwjob endings really dragged it down.  Bryan is definitely a bigger star as a result, but it didn’t feel like a satisfying ending at all.

Aces and 8’s vs. TNA…..just no.

For second place I’ll go with Punk vs. Heyman.  Yeah the promos were great and Lesnar vs. Punk might be match of the year, but the stuff with Axel and Ryback just killed time and Punk’s “extreme” attacks on Heyman were just lame.  The feud had its moments but there was too much bad stuff in there for it to hold up.

I’m going to give this to the Rhodes Family vs. the Authority.  The promos from Dusty were excellent, the matches with Shield got better and better every time with the tag title change being one of the best moments of the year, and the payoff actually worked.  Also, we’re getting one of the best comebacks ever from Goldust and it’s going to make Cody look like a bigger star that he ever has before.  It’s an awesome feud and the brothers are still riding momentum from it.




TLC 2013 Preview

We’re getting closer to the Road to Wrestlemania, which means I need to start packing for the biggest show of the year.  The major story for the show is the world title unification which has been thrown together in less than three weeks for reasons that aren’t quite clear.  Let’s get to it.We’ll start with the pre-show as always.  In case you missed the throwaway line on Raw, the match is Ziggler vs. Fandango in a match of who has fallen further since the summer.  I’ll take Ziggler to win in a match that will likely make people cancel their PPV orders instead of buying the show.

 

As for matches people might actually care about, I’m going with Orton to get both titles.  The seeds for a Cena heel turn are so obvious that they feel like they’re fakes and the Authority will screw him over.  These two in a TLC match should be a great brawl but everyone is waiting for the big story stuff at the end of the match.  Orton wins in an entertaining match.

 

I’ll take Bryan over the Wyatts due to Bray sitting at ringside and Bryan somehow hitting the knee on Rowan for a fast pin.  The key to the Wyatts has always been in their talking so even losing here isn’t the worst result in the world.  Bray will probably sit on the floor for most of the match anyway.

 

Shield over Punk as CM fights off Ambrose and Rollins but gets speared down for the pin.  Ambrose of course takes the credit, furthering the split.

 

Langston keeps the Intercontinental Title in the obvious result of the night.

 

Natalya has to win the title eventually right?  AJ has held the thing for months now and since it’s WWE, having a challenger lose most of the early title shots to win in the end is the norm, even though they look worthless leading up to the match.  Total Divas has wrapped up too, so I have no idea why they’d change the title now, making it all the more likely.

 

In the bonus match I’ll take Mysterio and Big Show to win the tag titles.  Why?  Because the tag division is getting really good so the solution is to put the belts on a thrown together team with I believe one match together at all.

 

If Miz vs. Kofi is added as it should be, I’ll take Miz with another freaking rollup.

 

Overall TLC is a one match show but it’s one heck of a match.  The idea of unifying the titles is something that needed to happen a long time ago and thankfully will get rid of a lot of the annoying problems WWE has, such as four people having 50 title reigns between the two of them in less than twelve years.  It’s far more about the big story to end the show and get us rolling down the road to Wrestlemania, The show should be entertaining enough, though adding in a ladder, chairs or tables match might have helped a bit.  Still though, it should be fun.

 

Thoughts/predictions?

 

 

 

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Smackdown – November 29, 2013: Why Smackdown Should Take A Lesson From Impact

Smackdown
Date: November 29, 2013
Location: Mohegan Sun Hotel and Casino, Uncasville, Connecticut
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

The main story coming into tonight is Cena vs. Orton being confirmed for TLC, but I can’t imagine we’ll get much on that at Smackdown. Other than that the big questions are what did the Wyatts do with Daniel Bryan and why did Shield take out Punk on Raw. The show likely won’t answer any questions but we might get a food fight because that’s how wrestling works around a holiday. Let’s get to it.

Theme song.

Here’s Renee Young in the ring to introduce Randy Orton. We look back at the end of Survivor Series where the Authority helped Orton beat Big Show with the Punt. Orton says he begs to differ with Renee’s version of things. First off he was playing possum instead of being knocked out. He didn’t need the Authority to prove he could beat Big Show. All that did was taint his inevitable victory. That brings us to Monday where Cena showed up to challenge Orton to the title unification match at TLC. Renee asks Orton about why he didn’t accept the match himself but Orton walks away.

We go to the back for the Thanksgiving party. Everyone is having a good time so here’s Vickie to let us know that this is a leftover party. She has everything anyone could want, but this will NOT turn into a food fight. There will however be an eating contest between Titus and Khali but we have to wait on the winner.

Curtis Axel vs. Mark Henry

Ryback and Langston are here as seconds. Henry throws Axel around as you would expect to get us going. Ryback gets in a cheap shot on Langston and the distraction lets Axel get in some cheap shots on the knee to take over. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Henry gets to his feet and throws Axel around like a small ferret. The JYD headbutts put Axel on the floor between two large muscular men and Ryback’s interference doesn’t work at all. Henry throws Curtis back inside for the World’s Strongest Slam and the pin at 3:08.

Rating: D. Axel is a guy in desperate need of a repackaging. The talent is there, but he needs something completely different after how badly he’s been crushed. At least he doesn’t have the title anymore. It looks like we’re setting up for Langston vs. Ryback, which is going to hurt someone in the short term when neither guy can really afford that.

Truth and Xavier Woods (in a Power Rangers shirt) are in the back when a ticked off Brodus Clay shows up. He gave them permission to use the music and Funkadactyls, not steal them. Brodus tells the rookie to watch his attitude and slaps him in the face. Truth and Tensai break up the fight as Brodus seems to have turned heel.

Back to the eating contest when AJ and Tamina crash the party. Vickie threatens to turn this into a food fight with the two of them against everyone else. That goes nowhere and we pan over to Khali passing out and Titus winning the contest. The win earns him a match with Antonio Cesaro tonight. Khali is covered in mashed potatoes.

Plymouth Rockers vs. Los Matadores/El Torito

3MB coming out to the Rockers’ music isn’t something I ever expected to see. JBL is WAY too excited to see El Torito. Torito gets things going with Slater as JBL refers to this as an inter-species match. The other Band members try to jump Torito but the Matadores dropkick them to the floor.

Torito dives through the ropes to take them out as the crowd is silent. Fernando gets stomped down in the 3MB corner with Drew draping Fernando’s feet on the ropes and firing off forearms to the back. A hot tag brings in Torito with a top rope hurricanrana followed by a flying headscissors. Off to Diego and the double Angle Slam ends McIntyre at 2:57. Comedy match and not a funny one.

Video on the European shows.

Tons of Funk vs. Xavier Woods/R-Truth

Tensai and Truth get us going with both guys escaping various hold attempts. Truth finally gets slammed down but blocks a charge in the corner with a boot to the face. Off to Woods who pounds on Tensai and kicks him in the jaw to little effect. An enziguri sends Tensai into the corner and it’s off to Brodus for the headbutt to the chest. A middle rope splash crushes Woods for the pin at 2:18. I like the idea of this feud. Stealing music seems like an easy way to start a feud but I don’t remember it being used since…..the late 80s?

Punk is worried that he hasn’t heard from Bryan and that he has bad ribs thanks to Reigns. He thinks Shield is acting on orders from someone.

Bray Wyatt talks about seeing mannequins in his dreams. Everyone is intoxicated in their own vanity but we all see symmetry. Bray insists that no one knows people like he does and that Daniel Bryan will be safe with them.

Titus O’Neal vs. Antonio Cesaro

Titus has a stomach ache which likely means a bad ending to this one. He grabs a headlock on Cesaro but gets dropkicked down, sending Titus into the ropes to hold his stomach. Titus jumps over Cesaro in the corner and kicks him in the face, only to make himself hurt more from the bark. Cesaro knees him in the stomach and puts on the Swing but Young comes in for the DQ at 2:00.

Titus is sick in JBL’s hat (censored of course) for the payoff. Zeb makes fun of Titus so he gets sick on Colter as well. This went on WAY too long.

The Raw ReBound covers the main event.

Tag Titles: Cody Rhodes/Goldust vs. Shield

Reigns and Rollins are challenging and Ambrose is on commentary. We get some big match intros and we’re ready to go. Cody grabs a headlock to start on Rollins as Cole asks if the Authority had anything to do with Shield attacking Punk on Monday. Apparently Cole doesn’t have clearance to get that answer so Ambrose says it’s Shield’s personal business. Cody slams Rollins down and brings in Goldust for a middle rope ax handle to the arm. Back to Cody who gets two off the front suplex and it’s back to the arm.

Reigns comes in and you can feel the match change in a hurry. Goldust bows up to fight him but is easily knocked to the floor. Back in and Reigns scores with an uppercut but gets caught by a dropkick for no cover. Everything breaks down for a bit with the champions clearing the ring as we take a break. Back with Cody working on Seth’s arm but not being able to hit the Alabama Slam out of the corner. Instead Seth sunset flips him down for two and kicks Cody in the head for the same.

The announcers talk about brothers being tag team champions and Ambrose asks a question we need a definitive answer to: are Edge and Christian brothers or not? Reigns comes in for some pounding before it’s quickly back to Rollins who chokes on the ropes. Cody gets caught in a front facelock by Reigns before getting dropped by a back elbow. Rollins comes back in but misses a charge, sending him out to the floor.

The hot tag brings in Goldust who clotheslines Reigns down a few times and a cross body gets one. Reigns breaks up the top rope cross body and sends Goldust to the floor as we take another break. Back with Goldust in trouble and being knocked into the corner by Rollins. We hit the chinlock on Goldust but he grabs a small package for two. A DDT puts Rollins down but Reigns knocks Cody off the apron to break up the hot tag.

Reigns clotheslines Goldust down for two and puts on a headlock. Goldust is taken into the Shield corner but comes out with a double clothesline to put everyone down. Now the hot tag brings in Cody with a missile dropkick and a sunset flip gets two on Rollins. Seth counters the moonsault press and sends Cody face first into the buckle to put him down.

Everything breaks down again and Goldust is sent into the barricade. Cody comes off the top with a nice plancha to take out both Shield members. Back in and Rollins avoids the moonsault press but misses the top rope knee. Cross Rhodes puts Seth out but Ambrose breaks it up for the DQ at 16:03 shown of 23:03.

Rating: B-. Do I really need to explain that a Shield match is good at this point? Yeah they do a lot of the same stuff in a lot of their matches, but they’re some of the most entertaining matches we’ve gotten this year. Cody and Goldust have awesome chemistry with these guys also so this was your usual very good TV match.

Post match here’s Punk with a chair to take out Shield. Vickie pops up on screen and makes it a six man tag.

Shield vs. CM Punk/Cody Rhodes/Goldust

The match is joined in progress as we come back with Punk pounding away on Ambrose in the corner. An elbow to the head gets two for Punk and it’s back to Goldust for a clothesline. That’s enough of the golden one so here’s Cody to pound on Dean in the corner a bit more. A backdrop out of the corner puts Ambrose down and here’s Punk again with a top rope ax handle to the head.

Ambrose avoids a charge in the corner and it’s off to Rollins, who is immediately taken down in a modified Indian deathlock. Back to Goldust to stay on the leg and here’s Cody for more of the same. JBL goes on a rant against Cole for reporting about the locker room, which somehow leads to him accusing Shield of helping Stanley Kubrick stage the moon landing. The tag champions stay on Rollins until Punk comes in with a backbreaker for two. There’s the bridging Indian deathlock with the facelock before it’s off to Cody for a half crab.

Rollins avoids a charge in the corner and brings in Ambrose as we take another break. Back with Dean slamming Cody down but charging into a boot in the corner, allowing for a tag to Punk. CM fires off his usual strikes followed by the swinging neckbreaker. He loads up the GTS….and here are the Wyatts. Punk charges at them but runs into Dean’s elbow and a beating from Reigns ensues. Back to Dean but Punk DDTs him at the same time Rollins is caught in a neckbreaker for a cool double team. Punk goes over to Goldust but the Wyatts pull Goldust to the floor for the DQ at 5:50 shown of 9:20.

Rating: C. This was much less interesting than the previous match. There’s only so much you can do with this much time, especially when Punk didn’t get to extract much revenge here. It wasn’t bad or anything but two tag matches in a row like this with mostly the same cast is a bit of a stretch.

Post match the brawl continues until the Usos and Mysterio head out for the save. Vickie comes out to make it a twelve man tag. Good grief.

Shield/Wyatt Family vs. Usos/Rey Mysterio/CM Punk/Goldust/Cody Rhodes

Back with Ambrose bringing in Harper to work over Jey Uso. Harper runs him over a few times but gets rolled up for two, meaning it’s time for Rollins to come in and stomp away. Seth stomps away in the corner and it’s off to bray for his hard hitting offense. Back to Harper for the Gator Roll into a front facelock but Jimmy gets in a cheap shot from the apron.

Rey comes in off the 495th hot tag of the matches but can’t knock the big man down. Instead it’s a big boot to Rey’s face for two and another tag to Wyatt. Bray hits a running splash in the corner and brings in Rowan for a swinging bearhug. A side slam gets two on Mysterio and it’s back to Ambrose for a front facelock. Rey gets sent into the corner and here’s Rollins, only to accidentally send Ambrose to the floor.

Mysterio gets in a kick to Seth’s head and it’s yet ANOTHER hot tag to Punk. He cleans house again and hits the suicide dive to Rowan on the floor. Back in and Punk hits three straight high knees to Erick in the corner. A neckbreaker sets up the Macho Elbow and everything breaks down. The Usos superkick two monsters and hit their dives on Harper and Rollins. Bray breaks up the GTS attempt on Rollins but Rey breaks up Sister Abigail. The 619 knocks Rowan into the GTS for the pin at 8:47.

Rating: D. Is it over yet? I’m almost afraid to say anything else about the match because it’ll probably turn into a 32 man tag match next. This went WAY too long and almost nothing had any interest to it by the end. We’ve seen these guys fighting so many times over the last few months and the last two parts of this dragged really badly. It wasn’t that it was a bad match but I was sick of watching these guys by the end.

Overall Rating: D. This didn’t work for me. The three tag matches are almost literally half of the show and the rest of the show is a bunch of thrown together nothing. For once, Impact had this show beaten. Last night’s Impact was another throw away show because of the holiday, but it actually had some storyline development. We got NOTHING here other than a tag match that went on twice as long as it should have. It wasn’t so much that the show was bad but it just didn’t matter at all, meaning there was no reason to sit through it.

Results

Mark Henry b. Curtis Axel – World’s Strongest Slam

Los Matadores/El Torito b. Plymouth Rockers – Double Angle Slam to McIntyre

Tons of Funk b. Xavier Woods/R-Truth – Middle rope splash to Woods

Antonio Cesaro b. Titus O’Neal via DQ when Darren Young interfered

Cody Rhodes/Goldust b. Shield via DQ when Dean Ambrose interfered

Cody Rhodes/Goldust/CM Punk b. Shield via DQ when the Wyatt Family interfered

Cody Rhodes/Goldust/CM Punk/Rey Mysterio b. Shield/Wyatt Family – GTS to Rowan

 

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Survivor Series 2013 Preview

It’s the fourth biggest show of the year and there’s actually a card for it now!As usual we’ll start on the pre-show.  I see absolutely no reason for Miz to lose here.  He’s coming off a heel turn and he’s against the jobber to end all jobbers in Kofi, so we’ll take what should e obvious here and say Miz wins.

 

Continuing the trend of easy picks, Big Show loses to Orton.  It’s obvious they’re setting up HHH vs. Big Show at TLC because if there’s one thing this company needs, it’s more Big Show.  Orton will be in trouble but come back somehow and cheat to win.  I could see a scenario where Big Show wins and HHH goes to take the title from him but I don’t think they’ll go there.

 

Cena over Del Rio of course, which will likely set up a third match between them at TLC.  Why WWE thinks anyone wants to see that is beyond me, but they make some very strange decisions in the main event scene at times.

 

Langston retains the title in the rematch.  I don’t think this really needs an explanation.

 

I’m going to go with what seems like the logical move and say Punk and Bryan beat the Wyatts.  The money to this feud is in Bray vs. the stars and it wouldn’t make sense having the Family get the win.  That being said, I wouldn’t be complaining if they did because those two could easily be a nice fixture in the tag division.  Punk and Bryan win but it’s a struggle.

 

Total Divas win because WWE thinks that’s what the people want to see.  Then again I’ve said that for months now and haven’t been right yet.

 

That leaves us with the traditional Survivor Series match which is a hard one to pick.  I’m going to go with the good guys here in a tossup.  The problem here is Roman Reigns, who just does not lose in WWE.  Unless he gets DQ’d or counted out, I can’t imagine him being eliminated.  On the other hand, I just can’t see the Real Americans and Shield winning overall.  I’ll take the tag champions, Usos and Rey but I wouldn’t be surprised if I’m wrong.

 

Overall the show looks better than it did a week ago but it doesn’t come off as important.  Usually, and as is the case here, a show is only as good as its top match.  Big Show vs. Orton is one of the weakest main events I can remember in a long time and that’s a bad sign for the rest of the show.  Survivor Series can work as a major show but WWE seems inept at making it one.  The show should be decent but it’s not going to wow anyone.




Survivor Series Count-Up – 2010: Here Lies Wade Barrett

Survivor Series 2010
Date: November 21, 2010
Location: American Airlines Arena, Miami, Florida
Attendance: 8,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Matt Striker

This is all about the Nexus with the main event of Orton vs. Barrett for the world title with Cena as the referee. If Barrett wins, Cena is free from Nexus. If Orton wins, Cena is fired. Other than that we’ve only got one Survivor Series match which is kind of a letdown but it could be worse. This is one of those shows that doesn’t mean much because of what happens the next night anyway so it’s hard to get into this in a way. This is one of the two Survivor Series I reviewed live so the grades should be interesting. Let’s get to it.

The usual opening video is the video that opens us. The idea tonight is Cena not wanting to compromise his integrity and give the title to Barrett when he doesn’t deserve it, but he doesn’t want to quit. A song about being what you believe plays over this.

US Title: Daniel Bryan vs. Ted DiBiase

DiBiase is challenging here because he wants to win his first title. Simple but effective I guess. Bryan has Rise of the Valkyries here which makes things all the more awesome but the lack of beard hurts. Maryse is with Ted here too and is rocking a beige dress. Bryan speeds things up to start and there go the lights. Daniel dropkicks DiBiase to the apron but as he goes to get Ted, Bryan gets suplexed out to the floor in a cool bump.

Back in and Bryan fires off the kicks. It’s so weird to not hear YES or NO whenever he hits…well anything actually. DiBiase hooks a chinlock to slow the champ down followed by a backbreaker and dropkick for two. Back to the chinlock as the fans are way into Bryan here. This one doesn’t last as long as Bryan fights up and speeds up the pace. There’s the moonsault out of the corner and a dropkick to send DiBiase to the floor. Bryan hits the suicide dive to the floor but he comes up favoring his shoulder. Why is that called favoring? It’s in worse shape than anything else so how is that favoring it?

They head back in and Bryan hits a missile dropkick for two and it’s time for more kicks. The LeBell (NO) Lock can’t go on because of the bad shoulder though and DiBiase clotheslines him down. Dream Street (Cobra Clutch) from DiBiase is countered twice so Ted hits a sitout spinebuster for two. Dibiase’s superplex is countered a belly to back superplex by Bryan but he still can’t get the LeBell Lock. A rollup gets two for Ted and Bryan grabs the arm for the LeBell Lock to retain.

Rating: C+. This felt like an extended Smackdown match but that’s not a bad thing. Bryan was still a pretty big underdog in a lot of his matches at this point but wins like this were exactly what he needed. DiBiase never got over in this role or really in any other either. He’s a guy who needs to change his name as he’s never going to get out from under his dad’s shadow and it’s crippling his career. Well that and WWE never putting him on TV.

As Bryan poses on the stage, Miz and Alex Riley (speaking of guys who need to be on TV more) jump him with the MITB case. Miz and Riley get in the ring but the lights go out again. Miz talks about how he’s from Cleveland and doesn’t like the Miami Heat that much. He compares Barrett to LeBron James because neither will ever be a world champion. The fans chant for the Heat and Miz says he’ll cash in soon. That’s true.

We recap Sheamus vs. Morrison. Sheamus is a bully, Morrison is sick of him. That’s it.

Sheamus says Morrison is jealous of him for being a former and future world champion because Morrison never will be.

Sheamus vs. John Morrison

Jerry tells a story of a guy in high school that kept taking everyone’s lunch money and picking on everyone he could but no one ever stood up to him. Striker: “Was his name Judas? (HUH?)” Jerry: “Actually it was Jerry Lawler.” Your lesson for the day kids: beat up other kids and treat them like trash and you could be a multiple time world champion and get a job on national TV every week and get into the WWE Hall of Fame. But you’d rather be a STAR right?

Cole says Morrison described this match as a tank against a fighter jet. Cole: “Of course Morrison the jet and Sheamus the tank.” What would we ever do without Cole? I’m not sure, but I’m going to go look into it. Anyway Morrison starts fast and dropkicks Sheamus to the floor followed by a corkscrew dive to take the pale one out. Sheamus sends him into the barricade and runs Morrison over with an ax handle.

Back in and we hit the chinlock as the fans aren’t all that into Sheamus at all. A backbreaker gets two for Sheamus and it’s back to a chinlock again, although this one has an armbar added in. Sheamus hits the ten forearms to the chest from a seated position instead of in the ropes. It’s always cool to see the evolution of a move like that. Sheamus puts him on the top and pounds away again but Morrison slugs Sheamus down to the mat. A cross body gets rolled through for two for Sheamus and John is in trouble.

The Brogue Kick misses and Morrison enziguris him down. Morrison is all fired up and hits some clotheslines for two but it’s hard to keep Sheamus down. Irish Curse stops the momentum but it only gets two again. The High Cross is countered into a Russian legsweep for two for Johnny. Sheamus goes after the knee to stop Morrison again. This match really is as back and forth as it sounds. No one has had an extended advantage for the most part.

Sheamus puts the leg over his shoulder and pulls Morrison forward to the mat in a cool looking move that I haven’t seen before. Half crab does more damage for Sheamus but he slaps Morrison in the face a few times to tick him off. John kicks him down but Starship Pain is broken up with ease. The High Cross is countered again and the Brogue Kick misses, allowing Morrison to hit the Flying Chuck and a running knee to the face for the surprise pin.

Rating: B-. These two always have this freakish chemistry that really doesn’t make a ton of sense but is always there. Morrison’s flying style was a great counter to the power stuff from Sheamus, and as usual the idea of power vs. speed works as well as anything else. Morrison would never hit a level that they were hoping for him to, while Sheamus would go on to win the world title at Wrestlemania in a few years. You never know what’s going to happen in wrestling, which is why it’s funny.

Watch Big Show’s movie! No one else has.

R-Truth continues to meddle in Cena’s business and offers to interfere in the main event tonight because you can only win by pin or submission. He offers to attack Orton and Cena will be guilt free. Cena yells at him for suggesting it.

Intercontinental Title: Kaval vs. Dolph Ziggler

Kaval is more famous as Low Ki and won NXT Season 2 to get any title shot he wanted. In his first win, he beat Dolph on Smackdown and picked to challenge for this title tonight. A quick elbow gets two so Dolph takes over with a forearm in the corner. There’s the Hennig necksnap and a mini AA for two for Dolph. A handspring elbow takes Dolph down and Kaval pounds away in the corner until a Vickie distraction lets Dolph take him down.

Kaval comes back with a handspring into a kick to the face in the corner which looked pretty awesome. Kaval goes up with his back to the ring, allowing Dolph to put on a sleeper on the top rope for some reason. Dolph gets knocked back and Kaval misses a big flip dive, allowing Dolph to hit the Fameasser for two. The sleeper goes on (on the mat this time) but Kaval escapes and is launched to the top rope where he springs off and hits a spin kick to the face in ANOTHER awesome looking move. Ziggler misses a charge in the corner and gets rolled up for two before Ziggler gets a rollup of his own with tights to retain.

Rating: C-. Kaval tried here but this crippled whatever he had as far as momentum was going. He would be gone before the end of the year and I can’t say I blame him. The match here was ok enough but the chemistry didn’t click at all. Also, why would you pick a match for the IC Title when you can pick whatever you want?

Jack Swagger doesn’t like the idea about being on Team Del Rio, because it should be Team Swagger. Jack says some stuff about the Spanish being spoken here because he doesn’t habla Espanol. Rhodes, who is still Dashing at this point, comes up and makes fun of Swagger’s shoes. Del Rio, who only mostly sucks at this point, says that he won a bet about Swagger getting interrupted. This goes nowhere.

Team Del Rio vs. Team Mysterio

Alberto Del Rio, Tyler Reks, Drew McIntyre, Jack Swagger, Cody Rhodes

Rey Mysterio, Chris Masters, Big Show, MVP, Kofi Kingston

Team Mysterio is all in blue in a nice touch. The fans chant for MVP as he’s the hometown boy. The captains start things off but there’s no contact as Del Rio tags in Rhodes. We start talking about baseball (Striker: “Rickey Henderson may be the greatest baseball player of all time.” Cole and Lawler: “WHAT???”) as Rey hooks an O’Connor Roll for two on Cody. Cody comes back with a Disaster Kick and stomps away in the corner.

Here’s Del Rio again who gets caught in the corner and hit by a hard running dropkick. Off to MVP who hits a dropkick and ducks an enziguri in the corner. This was right around the time when he was getting good, but he would be gone in less than three weeks. Here’s Kofi with some bouncing offense but it’s quickly off to Masters. Lawler does his usual talk about the Clowns vs. Kings back in 94 as Reks and McIntyre take turns beating on Masters.

Drew’s middle rope jumps lands on a boot and Masters can tag in MVP. MVP suplexes McIntyre down and hits the Ballin Elbow, only to fall victim to the Ultimate Warrior/Rick Rude ending from Mania 5 (MVP suplexes Drew but Alberto hooks MVP’s foot and Drew falls on top for a pin). Masters comes back in again and hits a kind of Jackhammer for two. Del Rio avoids the Masterlock and puts on the Armbreaker for the submission to make it 5-3.

Here’s Big Show as the stopper for his team and Del Rio bails, bringing in Swagger. Swagger tries to wrestle him down and is immediately chopped in the chest. A kind of chop block takes Show down and it’s back to Del Rio. Show glares at him again and Alberto tags out to Drew, but before Alberto gets out Show knocks him out cold. With McIntyre down, Show slams Kofi down onto Drew for a two count. Apparently Alberto can’t continue and is eliminated. Cody comes in to face Kingston and Rhodes snaps when he gets hit in the face. He goes on a rant and heads to the floor to check the mirror on the back of his jacket.

Rhodes heads back in and gets hit in the face again. Off to Show who slaps Cody on the back and the KO punch makes it 3-3. It’s Kofi/Rey/Show vs. Reks/Swagger/McIntyre and Reks immediately clotheslines Show down in an impressive move. Swagger comes in to work on the leg and hooks the ankle lock. After nearly tapping, Show crawls over to Rey for the saving tag. Rey speeds things up but Jack kicks his head off for two.

Swagger drills Kofi on the apron before catching Rey’s 619 into the ankle lock. Mysterio rolls through the hold and makes the hot tag to Kofi who cleans house and hits the top rope cross body on Reks for two. Kofi misses a charge in the corner and gets caught in the Tree of Woe. After Kofi gets down, Reks charges into a double boot in the corner for the fast elimination. Swagger comes in almost immediately and catches Trouble in Paradise into the ankle lock to tie things back up. Kofi tapping is a weird sight.

Back to Big Show who uses that large body of his to run Swagger over a few times before Swagger has to lay down so Rey and Show can do the on the shoulders splash. McIntyre breaks up the big splash though and Rey is down. Rey gets placed on the top rope but headbutts Jack down to the mat. The 619 sets up that splash off Show’s shoulders to make it 2-1. Future Shock is countered and it’s a chokeslam from Show for the elimination.

Rating: B-. This was a fine Survivor Series match with both teams working well together. I don’t get the point in having Del Rio eliminated that early, but I guess it allows for Rey vs. Del Rio to happen later on. The match wasn’t a classic but it worked well enough for what it was supposed to be. Decent stuff here and the fans were happy with the ending.

Randy Orton talks about how he’s tired of hearing all of the talk about Cena and Barrett, because tonight it’s either the RKO or the Punt to stop Barrett.

Divas Title: Laycool vs. Natalya

I miss Laycool’s entrance, if nothing else for how they look in the shorts. Laycool are the co champions here as both have belts in a story that wasn’t that interesting in the first place. The champs have to tag here and it’s Michelle to start. Natalya takes it to the mat early on and Michelle actually takes over with the amateur stuff. Off to the hometown heel in Layla who distracts the referee so Michelle can pull Nattie onto the floor.

Back in and Natalya supelxes both chicks at once but her back is hurt in the process. Michelle blasts her in said back on the floor, but Natalya shoves Michelle over the barricade. They all brawl at ringside for a bit before Natalya and Michelle head into the ring. McCool gets rammed into Layla and the Sharpshooter gives Natalya the title.

Rating: D. Here’s this whole feud in a nutshell: Natalya beat up Layla, then Natalya beat up Michelle, then Natalya beat up both of them at once. This wasn’t much of a match but it’s the kind of breather that you have to give the fans before you get to the big stuff later on. Laycool would be around for a few more months, but once they split they fell off the face of the planet all of a sudde.

Beth Phoenix returns to save Nattie from a double beatdown. This would set up a Divas tables match next month.

We recap Kane vs. Edge. Kane beat Taker in the Cell (Today is November 6, 2012 and that match is the last time Smackdown main evented a PPV to date) when Paul Bearer shocked no one and turned on Taker. Edge got this shot by uh……tall. I think he just got the shot because he was on a hot streak. Edge also kidnapped Bearer and tortured him and I don’t think has returned him yet.

Smackdown World Title: Edge vs. Kane

Kane is defending here. Edge wheels out with an empty wheelchair to mess with Kane a bit more. Kane tries a quick chokeslam but Edge punches out of it. Kane sends him to the floor and Edge wheels the chair around a bit more to make Kane mad. A baseball slide sends Kane into the barricade before we head back inside where the Canadian takes out the Spaniard’s leg. He wraps the leg around the post and lays on it for a bit to make sure we don’t get excited.

Kane gets in an uppercut to take over and slugs away slowly. The Big Bald chokes away and yells about Bearer a bit as the fans aren’t really thrilled by this stuff. Granted I question how many fans know Smackdown exists still so it’s a fair problem to have. To really mix things up, Kane puts on a cravate and yells even more. A low dropkick gets two for the champion and it’s back to the trusty cravate. Edge finally gets up and hits a cross body off the top for two.

Kane slugs him down but Edge dropkicks him out of the air on the top rope clothesline attempt. A side slam gets two for Kane and he goes up again. Edge makes the stop but gets crotched and clotheslined down for two. Something resembling a DDT puts Kane down but Edge’s spear hits boot. There’s the chokeslam for two so Kane tries the Tombstone. Edge slips down the back and spears Kane down for the pin and no title, because all four shoulders were down and it’s a draw. Yep, that’s really what they did.

Rating: F+. The ending until the cover wasn’t bad, but other than that this was dull, slow and horrible. These two just did not work well together at all, so of course they had another title match on PPV. Horrible match here as Kane just stood around and held Edge by the neck for LONG stretches of time. Kane would accidentally kill Paul Bearer soon after this. Don’t ask.

Kane beats up Edge post match. Edge comes back and puts Kane in the wheelchair and sends him through part of the barricade.

Barrett tells Cena if he doesn’t help him tonight, Cena is gone. Apparently Nexus started in this building. Cena says he knows what he’s going to do.

Tag Titles: Nexus vs. Vladimir Kozlov/Santino Marella

Slater and Gabriel are the champions here and have Harris/McGillicutty/Otunga with them. Santino and Slater start things off and Marella gets to use some of the martial arts that Kozlov has been teaching him. Off to Gabriel and Kozlov who tags himself in. Remember that two years ago, Kozlov was in the world title match against HHH and now he’s here. That’s quite the fall. Gabriel dives at Kozlov and gets caught in a kind of spinebuster to give the challengers control.

Gabriel gets in a kick to take Koz down and Slater drops a knee for two. Back to Justin for a cravate and then a front facelock. Kozlov is about to get to Santino when Slater draws Cobra Man in. That’s some good old school tag stuff there and it’s awesome. Slater hooks a front facelock of his own but it’s a hot tag to Santino. He hits all of his usual stuff and loads up the Cobra, but the other members of Nexus distract him (not that hard really) and Slater hits the sleeper drop for the pin to retain.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here that wouldn’t be on Raw on any given week. The tag titles were absolutely nothing at this point but then again that could go for any show for a good six year stretch or so. It makes the current tag team resurgence look more impressive as they took it from nowhere to something decent, which is a big deal. The match here was fine but it was another breather for the fans.

Post match the challengers get beaten down again and the Anonymous Raw GM says if Nexus interferes in the world title match, they’re suspended indefinitely.

We recap Orton vs. Barrett. Barrett got the title shot I believe through winning NXT and got Cena to join Nexus through winning at HIAC. Cena hates it and somehow he gets to be the guest referee tonight. If he screws Orton over, he won’t be able to live with himself, but if he doesn’t screw Orton over, Barrett will fire him. This gets the music video treatment of course.

Raw World Title: Wade Barrett vs. Randy Orton

Oh and you can only win by pin or submission. Feeling out process to start with Orton grabbing a headlock. A shoulder puts Barrett down and Orton fires away elbows and uppercuts in the corner. Cena finally does something and it’s correct procedure, but the fans boo because it’s against Orton. He goes the same thing to Barrett and Orton hits a dropkick to take over.

We head to the floor where Barrett hits a kick to the ribs to take over. Orton gets sent into the steps and punched down back in the ring. Barrett covers and gets a fair one count. We hit the chinlock for a good while until Orton fights back with his usual comeback stuff. The backbreaker gets two and Orton glares at Cena. Barrett gets in an uppercut and hits a top rope elbow for two.

Barrett hits his pumphandle slam for two and now Barrett glares at Cena too. This is pretty dull stuff so far. Wasteland is countered and there’s a Boss Man Slam (called a Black Hole Slam by Striker) for another close two. The fans do the usual pro/anti Cena chants as Orton hits the Elevated DDT. Barrett gets in a knee to the head and Wasteland hits, but Orton grabs the rope at two. I do love how the idea that Barrett could just win the title on his own is a completely non-factor. Barrett shoves Cena so Cena shoves him back, right into the RKO and the clean pin to fire Cena. Striker: “Cena’s free!” Cole: “Cena’s fired.” Striker: “Oh.”

Rating: D. This barely worked as the focus was entirely on Cena and the match was really dull for the most part. It was someone hitting a move that would be lucky to get two and then glaring at Cena when they didn’t get a pin off of it. Cena was “fired” as a result, but would of course be back on PPV the next month. I don’t think he ever missed a Raw. I like the moment with him counting the pin because that’s him being himself which is the essence of Cena’s character, but the match sucked.

Cena has no idea what to do post match. Nexus runs in and gets beaten down by the Super Best Friends. Cena hands Orton the title to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. The main events sucked but the first half or so of this was fine. The problem with the main event here is the same problem that brought down the whole Nexus angle: Barrett never won the title. Without that, Nexus and Barrett in particular weren’t really big threats but rather guys that annoyed Cena for a few months until he beat them all. Besides, the next night Miz cashed in and won the title after Cena cost Barrett another title shot. This show isn’t really worth seeing but it’s not horrible.

Ratings Comparison

Daniel Bryan vs. Ted DiBiase

Original: B

Redo: C+

John Morrison vs. Sheamus

Original: B

Redo: B-

Dolph Ziggler vs. Kaval

Original: B-

Redo: C-

Team Mysterio vs. Team Del Rio

Original: B-

Redo: B-

Natalya vs. Laycool

Original: D+

Redo: D

Kane vs. Edge

Original: D

Redo: F+

Nexus vs. Santino Marella/Vladimir Kozlov

Original: D

Redo: D+

Randy Orton vs. Wade Barrett

Original: D+

Redo: D

Overall Rating

Original: B

Redo: D+

I liked this one WAY better on first viewing. Then again I didn’t know what was coming for Nexus back then.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/11/19/history-of-survivor-series-count-up-2010-when-did-orton-and-barrett-get-good/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – November 18, 2013: The Raw Special

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 18, 2013
Location: Bridgestone Arena, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole

Tonight Raw goes country because WWE hates me. The only things we’ve been told about for tonight is the band Florida Georgia Line performing and likely being confronted by 3MB. Other than that we might get a confrontation between Oakland A’s pitcher Jason Reddick and Daniel Bryan because they’ve been having a Twitter feud. This is what life is like on the go home show for Survivor Series in 2013. Let’s get to it.

The opening video recaps last week’s struggle to fill in the power vacuum left due to the Authority being on vacation.

Langston vs. Axel for the Intercontinental Title tonight.

Here’s the Authority to open the show. HHH talks about how things went nuts in the absence of true authority and no one likes chaos. Those who caused things to fall apart last week, such as Brad Maddox and Vickie Guerrero, will be dealt with tonight. This brings out a ticked off Randy Orton who says that the Authority is to blame for a lot of the troubles around here.

They’re the ones that gave Big Show a title match he didn’t deserve and thinks he can’t beat Big Show on his own this Sunday on his own. HHH gets in his face but Stephanie plays peacekeeper. Brad and Vickie interrupt with Vickie saying excuse me in a very timid voice. Brad apologizes but insists it was all Vickie’s fault because that’s the kind of guy he is. Stephanie doesn’t want to hear this and makes individual matches for the GM’s. Vickie gets AJ and Brad gets Randy Orton. The latter of those two is right now. HHH makes it No DQ because he can. Maddox tries to leave but Kane stops him.

Randy Orton vs. Brad Maddox

No DQ. Brad bails to the floor then does it again when Orton goes for him. Maddox gets on a mic and says Orton doesn’t want to do this but gets caught running away again. Orton tries to get him into the ring but Brad hits him with the microphone before sending him into the post. A DDT gets two in the ring and Orton is MAD. He throws Brad over the top rope and then over the announce table. Maddox is sent into the steps and loses his shirt before Orton posts him. The Elevated DDT on the floor knocks Maddox out cold. Back in and Orton hits him about 25 times in the head with the microphone until the referee stops it 3:50.

Rating: N/A. This was a glorified segment rather than a match so I’m not going to bother rating it. They’re going to turn Maddox face at this rate which isn’t a bad idea for the most part. They need someone with authority to stand up to the Authority, even though the Authority would likely just strip him of his job. The fans seem to be into Maddox too, which likely isn’t a good sign for him.

Maddox was take out on a stretcher during the break. As he’s being put in the ambulance, Vickie looks terrified.

Intercontinental Title: Big E. Langston vs. Curtis Axel

They treat this as a big deal with full entrances and the big match intros. Axel, the champion, is officially no longer a Paul Heyman guy. Langston easily takes him to the mat but gets elbowed in the face to give Axel a breather. Big E. easily tosses Axel around and sends him to the floor to start a chase. Back in and Langston clotheslines him down like it’s nothing as this is one sided so far.

A standing backdrop gets two on the champion but he hits a quick hot shot to get a breather. Axel pounds on his back a bit and we take a break. Back with Axel getting two off a dropkick and hooking a front facelock. Langston finally gets up and just throws Curtis off of him before scoring with some clotheslines. A belly to belly puts Axel down and there’s the Warrior Splash for two. The straps come down and the Big Ending gives Langston the title at 8:50.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t bad but it does beg the question: if they want to make Langston into a big deal, why in the world would you job him clean to Del Rio last week in four minutes? Either way, it was definitely the right idea to switch the belt here as Axel is long past the point of mattering. A gimmick change could help him a lot at the moment because the potential is definitely there.

Orton, in a jacket of all things, is with Shield in the back. He tells them that they’ll have his back because that’s what the Authority wants. Reigns is cool with that, as long as Orton has their back as well. Orton doesn’t say yes.

Time for our first country music bit: Divas musical chairs. The song is by Florida Georgia Line and played over the PA system. The girls don’t circle the chairs and it’s Natalya out first. Alicia goes next and a brawl is about to break out. JBL: “This is the dumbest thing I’ve ever seen.” Thankfully it only lasts about two rounds until the fight breaks out. Cole: “Musical chairs has broken down.” JBL: “It always does.” The Total Divas actually clear the ring, likely setting up another Survivor Series match.

Big Show vs. Ryback

They shove each other around to start with Big Show throwing Ryback into the corner for some right hands and a headbutt. A hard chop and a shoulder puts Ryback on the floor for a nine count as things slow down. Back in and Ryback pounds away before taking out the knee. Some forearms to the back and a leg drop get two and we hit the front facelock followed by a chinlock.

The hold stays on for a good while as Ryback calls a lot of spots. Show finally suplexes his way out before scoring with some clotheslines. Ryback comes back with a very nice spinebuster (all things considered) for two but the Meathook is countered into a chokeslam attempt. Ryback kicks out of it and hits the Meathook before actually hitting Shell Shock on Big Show for two. Ryback tries it again but Big Show shoves him away and hits the WMD for the pin at 7:57.

Rating: C. This is a good example of WWE not thinking more than a week in advance. Ryback hitting Shell Shock on Big Show was rumored to be a major spot at Wrestlemania, but here it’s used as a near fall in a warmup match on a gimmick Raw show. Why in the world would you use it here instead of using it to make Ryback look like a big deal? Oh wait: it’s time for Big Show’s latest push that no one cares about. How could I forget?

Post match Orton tries to sneak in but gets speared down.

Zack Ryder is with Florida Georgia Line when 3MB comes in dressed as cowboys. They’re the Rhinestone Cowboys this week and nothing funny occurs.

Orton is having his ribs taped up.

The Miz/Kofi Kingston vs. Real Americans

Real Americans vs. Goldust/Cody Rhodes for the tag titles on Friday. Miz gets caught in a quick wristlock by Cesaro before hitting the corner clothesline and the top rope ax handle for two. Cesaro catches him in a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for no cover before sending Miz to the floor and tagging in Swagger. Jack sends him into the corner for the Vader Bomb followed by the Cesaro double stomp for two.

Off to a quick arm hold, only to have Miz fight up and make the hot tag off to Kofi. House is quickly cleaned with all of Kofi’s jumps and dives, only to be caught in a powerslam for two by Swagger. Kingston spins around Jack’s clothesline into a DDT before going over to Miz for the tag…..but Miz turns on him, allowing Swagger to hook the Patriot Lock for the win at 4:45.

Rating: C-. The match was obvious as soon as they announced the title match on Friday. Miz turning heel is the right move as his face turn just wasn’t working at all. The guy is just a natural heel and wasn’t doing anything as a good guy. If nothing else maybe he’ll stop using the stupid Figure Four which doesn’t work at all for him.

Vickie pretends to have been attacked to get out of her match with AJ.

Stephanie doesn’t buy the injury despite Vickie being loaded onto a stretcher. Could it be because Vickie looked right at the camera before pretending to pass out?

AJ Lee vs. Vickie Guerrero

Vickie is wheeled to the arena, screaming that this can’t happen. I have no idea who the face is supposed to be in this thing but I’m sure I just don’t get what’s going on. Vickie “passes out” again and asks for some water before the bell. She tries to run again and actually gets by Tamina but AJ chases her down. Back in and the Black Widow (the only move of the match) gets the submission at 1:28.

Vickie faints again post match.

There will indeed be a fourteen Diva Survivor Series match on Sunday with the Total Divas against everyone else.

HHH makes a Broadway Brawl between Ziggler and Sandow for tonight. What does that mean? HHH: “I don’t even know.”

Dolph Ziggler vs. Damien Sandow

There are a bunch of musical instruments in the ring, mainly string stuff. Sandow throws him to the floor but misses a shot with an electric guitar. Ziggler dives off the steps to take him down as the announcers reference musical acts from the 70s and earlier. Back in and Damien pounds away before getting caught by a nice dropkick to send him back outside. Ziggler goes up top but dives into a shot from an organ to the ribs as we take a break.

Back with Sandow stomping away on Ziggler in the corner as Cole talks about Lawler meeting Ronnie Milsap. Ziggler comes back but misses a fiddle shot, allowing Sandow to hit him with a guitar for two. Dolph hits a DDT and breaks the fiddle over Sandow’s head before the Fameasser gets two. Sandow goes nuts again and launches Ziggler into the corner before ramming Dolph head first into a chair in the corner for a close two.

Ziggler gets thrown into the drums and hit with a guitar for two. Sandow misses a charge into the post and Ziggler rolls him up for two. A snare drum over Damien’s head and a bass drum does the same, basically tying Sandow up. Ziggler grabs the only remaining guitar, struts over, and blasts Sandow in the head for the pin at 10:17.

Rating: D. Was this supposed to be funny? That’s a genuine question. The announcers were treating it like a comedy match but apparently these two don’t like each other. I say apparently because I don’t remember them having any altercations in recent history, unless I’m forgetting some throwaway segment on Smackdown somewhere. The match was dumb as are most gimmick matches though. We’re also supposed to ignore Sandow’s shoulders being inside the drum and not on the mat.

We look at the opening of Raw and Big Show spearing Orton down again.

Orton goes into the Authority’s office and asks where Shield was earlier. He wants to know if he has the Authority’s confidence but Stephanie says they have to think about it.

Cena talks to Florida Georgia Line.

Here’s Cena with his arm in a sling again, saying he’s had to watch what Del Rio did to his arm on Smackdown every day since it happened. We get a clip of Cena winning the arm wrestling contest, only to have Del Rio put him through a table and lock on the armbreaker in a chair again. Cena says he came back for the fans but thinks maybe he came back too soon and shouldn’t be World Heavyweight Champion. Then he looks around and feels the atmosphere which makes him know he should be champion.

A champion is made of things like determination and toughness instead of cheap shots like Del Rio. Cena says Del Rio doesn’t know what he’s getting into on Sunday and he’ll walk out with the title. This brings out Del Rio who says we have a real superhero in the house. Cena almost made him cry, which Cena says is good because on Sunday he’ll make Del Rio tap.

Del Rio asks Cena to lift up the title with the arm in a sling which Cena can’t do. Alberto gets in the ring while talking about taking advantages of every opportunity. Cena says that’s what champions do and pounds on Alberto before trying the AA, only to have Del Rio escape to the floor.

Rhinestone Cowboys vs. R-Truth/Xavier Woods

3MB remember and it’s Slater on the floor this time. Woods is the former Consequences Creed in TNA and has been in NXT for a good while now. Truth starts with Jinder and we get some hip gyrations. Off to Woods for a dropkick to Mahal followed by a headscissors. McIntyre gets a blind tag but gets caught by a forearm to the face. Woods tries to fight both of them off and gets kicked in the face by Drew to take over.

Woods escapes a slam attempt and tags in Truth who catches Drew with a jumping kick to the head. The sitout front suplex takes McIntyre down again and the suplex into a Stunner sets up the tag to Woods. The Honor Roll (front flip clothesline) sets up the Best in the Woods (Eat Defeat though it’s called Lost in the Woods in NXT) for the pin on McIntyre at 3:15.

Rating: C. This was fine. I kind of like the idea of having Woods just show up in a match instead of some big buildup. I’m not the biggest fan of Xavier but he looked good in the ring and is a good asset to the company since he’s already got a masters degree and is going for his PH.D.

The winners dance post match.

The Authority says they have confidence in Orton but he has no Shield to help him on Sunday. When he wins, he’ll prove to everyone that he’s the face of the WWE. Orton promises to show them confidence.

Florida Georgia Line performs Round Here, the theme song of tonight’s show.

Shield/Wyatt Family vs. Daniel Bryan/CM Punk/Cody Rhodes/Goldust/Usos

There’s a lot of time for this. Jimmy Uso starts against Dean Ambrose with Dean taking him down with a shoulder, only to be clotheslined right back. Off to Jey vs. Reigns with Jey suckering him into the good guy corner where the tag champions work on Roman’s arms. It’s Goldust staying in to backdrop the now legal Rollins before hitting a quick uppercut and atomic drop. A kick to the side of Seth’s head gets two and it’s off to Jey, who charges into an elbow in the corner.

Rollins sends him to the floor but Harper tags himself in to get a piece. The two three man teams argue on the floor as we take a break. Back with Goldust working on Seth’s arm before bringing his brother back in for some right hands. Seth sends Cody into the buckle and the heels take over. Reigns comes in to pound Cody down before it’s back to Seth. Shield is intentionally not tagging in the Wyatts.

Ambrose comes in and pounds away in the corner before clotheslining Cody down for two. Rollins comes back in but has to stop Cody from making a hot tag. Shield finally brings in Rollins who gets taken down by Cody, allowing the hot tag to Bryan. It’s kicks a go-go with Bryan taking down everyone in sight. Harper is sent to the corner but Bryan has to go after Rollins, taking him down with a release German suplex instead of going after Luke. Bryan finally goes after the monster but gets caught in a running sitout powerbomb out of the corner.

The tag brings in Bray Wyatt for some hard elbow drops to Bryan. Bray looks over at Shield and asks if he can trust them before tagging in Reigns. Shield takes their turns beating on Bryan with Ambrose coming in for a modified STF. Bryan gets out and clotheslines Ambrose down but all five of Dean’s partners knock Bryan’s partners off the country as we take another break.

Back with Reigns pounding away on Bryan but getting caught in a DDT. The fans beg him to make the tag and get their wish as Punk comes in for the first time to clean whatever is still dirty in the house. He takes out every heel in sight, including Rollins and Ambrose with a DDT and neckbreaker at the same time. Punk hits the Macho Elbow on Ambrose but Bray distracts him from hitting the GTS.

Instead Punk slaps the Anaconda Vice on Dean, allowing the Family to break it up. Everything breaks down with the Usos hitting their stereo dives on the Family and Ambrose escaping the GTS into the bulldog driver for two. We hit the parade of finishers which goes too fast to keep up with. Punk and Bryan hit a Hart Attack on Rollins because they’re old school like that. The GTS to Ambrose is good for the pin at 24:04.

Rating: C+. This was more long than it was good but the ending sequence was awesome, as almost all parades of finishers are. Again though, why does Ambrose have to take the pin? There are five other guys out there but the only champion on the team has to get pinned? Really? Still though, good stuff.

Post match the Real Americans and other heels come in for the beatdown but REY MYSTERIO returns for the save, apparently as the fifth man on the team at Survivor Series.

Overall Rating: C-. I’m thinking about officially naming this kind of show the Raw Special: it would have been a solid two hour show but the third hour dragged it back to earth. There was some interesting stuff on here like Langston winning the title and Miz turning heel like he should have been all along, but then there’s the other half. Some of the stuff on here was horrid, such as the Cena/Del Rio promo, the AJ vs. Vickie “match” and Ziggler vs. Sandow. At least we fleshed out some of the Survivor Series card, but that doesn’t make this any kind of a good go home show.

Results

Randy Orton b. Brad Maddox via referee stoppage

Big E. Langston b. Curtis Axel – Big Ending

Big Show b. Ryback – WMD

Real Americans b. The Miz/Kofi Kingston – Patriot Lock to Kingston

AJ Lee b. Vickie Guerrero – Black Widow

Dolph Ziggler b. Damien Sandow – Guitar shot to the head

R-Truth/Xavier Woods b. Rhinestone Cowboys – Best in the Woods to McIntyre

CM Punk/Daniel Bryan/Usos/Cody Rhodes/Goldust b. Shield/Wyatt Family – GTS to Ambrose

 

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Monday Night Raw – November 11, 2013: Handicapped By Too Much Authority

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 11, 2013
Location: Phones4u Arena, Manchester, England
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s a rare taped show tonight as the company is over in England. The main story coming in is Big Show being the new guy to stand up to the regime, having forced his way back into a job. Kane has also joined the bad guys and is now the director of operations, a position which hasn’t exactly been defined yet. Let’s get to it.

We open with a video honoring American’s military veterans narrated by John Cena. Classy as always.

We recap the angle at the end of last week’s show with Big Show getting his job back as well as a title shot at Survivor Series. The video also includes the handicap match and Big Show being put through a table.

The Authority (the official name for HHH and Stephanie) isn’t here tonight so it’s not clear who is in charge.

Here’s Orton to open the show. He thinks he’s going to win at Survivor Series and says that since the Authority isn’t here, he’s in charge tonight. This brings out Brad Maddox to say he’s the GM and therefore in charge, but here’s Kane before he can make his first match. Kane says that he’s in charge in the absence of the Authority.

Maddox says he’s actually in charge, so the opening match is Randy Orton vs. Cody Rhodes. Kane says no, because it’s Orton vs. Goldust. Maddox says not so fast and Orton says pick an opponent because he can’t fight them both.. Here’s Vickie to suck up to the Authority a bit before saying she’s confident in Orton’s authority. The crowd shouts her down so much that you can barely hear her, but she makes Orton vs. Goldust and Rhodes in a handicap match.

Goldust/Cody Rhodes vs. Randy Orton

Goldust gets things going and quickly hiptosses and armdrags Orton down for two. Off to Cody to stay on the arm as the fans are all behind the Golden One. The release gordbuster gets two and it’s back to Goldust who is stomped down in the corner. The fans chant Randy’s Boring before starting what I believe was a JBL chant. Now it’s a Jerry chant. Orton runs into a boot in the corner but kicks Goldust off the middle rope as we take a break.

Back with Goldust fighting out of a chinlock and catching Orton in a powerslam. A double clothesline puts both guys down and there’s the hot tag to Cody who comes in with a missile dropkick. A spinning sunset flip out of the corner gets two for Rhodes and the moonsault press gets the same. Everything breaks down and Cody fights out of the RKO before a double clothesline puts Orton on the floor. Orton takes the countout at 8:50.

Rating: C-. This was ok but the ending was obvious. I’m glad they didn’t have either side do the job as it would mess up too much momentum that has been built over the last few months. It’s interesting to see Vickie act like something resembling a face, but she’s not exactly the right choice for it.

Post match here’s Big Show (said to not be here in a story that lasted 20 minutes) to destroy Orton and chokeslam him through the announce table.

Big Show left during a break to go get a pint.

Los Matadores/Santino Marella vs. Union Jacks

The Union Jacks are 3MB (no masks or anything) in British flag attire. Santino has bull horns on his head. Slater and Diego get us going but Mahal makes a blind tag and gets two off a knee to the head. A 3MB triple team takes Diego down and it’s McIntyre with a stomp to the head.

Santino tags himself in and pounds away on Mahal but his headbutt hits knees. Torito distracts Slater and chases him around, allowing Santino to gore Slater from behind. McIntyre finally catches the bull but Los Matadores dive through the ropes for the save. Torito goes up top and dives onto Slater, allowing Santino to hit the Cobra (with horns) on Mahal for the pin at 2:55.

Brad Maddox apologizes to Orton when Vickie comes up to apologize as well. Orton doesn’t want to hear it but Kane comes in and tells Orton to quit mouthing off. Randy sends them all off because his shoulder is messed up.

Damien Sandow vs. Kofi Kingston

Damien is still very aggressive and pounds Kingston down to start. He puts on a chinlock before dropping a knee for two. The Wind-Up Elbow gets two more but Kofi avoids a legdrop. Kofi fights back with some right hands and a kick to the head but gets knocked off the top and walks into You’re Welcome for the pin at 3:50.

Rating: D+. This was just an extended squash but that’s what Kofi is good for. He’s probably never going to get past this level but he’s capable of putting on a good match with just about anyone and can make anybody look better. Sandow being aggressive is a decent idea and having a new finisher is the best thing that could happen to him.

Intercontinental Title: Curtis Axel vs. Dolph Ziggler

Cole goes into his Hall of Fame stat sheet as Axel grabs a headlock to start. An elbow to the jaw puts Ziggler into the corner and Axel stomps him down. They trade dropkicks for two each and Ziggler swivels his hips a bit. Ziggler takes him down again and drops the ten elbows for two. Curtis sends him to the floor and slaps him around back inside but Ziggler scores with a jumping DDT to put both guys down.

Ziggler avoids a charge and sends Axel shoulder first into the post before another elbow gets two. Axel comes back with a nice catapult into the buckle for two but Ziggler hits a Fameasser for the same. A Saito Suplex gets two for the champion but he takes too much time going up, allowing Ziggler to hit a middle rope X Factor for two. The Zig Zag is countered into a kind of release flapjack, allowing Axel to hit the neckbreaker into a faceplant for the pin at 9:09.

Rating: C+. This was MUCH better than I was expecting here with both guys hitting a lot of big spots for some nice near falls. Axel is a guy who can have good matches but he’s such damaged goods at this point that it’s almost impossible to take him seriously. Ziggler is clearly not going back to the main event scene anytime soon so having him do stuff like this is the right call.

Kane demands respect from Brad Maddox so Brad makes the Real Americans vs. John Cena in another handicap match. Kane one ups him by making Shield vs. Daniel Bryan and CM Punk. No handshake is given.

Zack Ryder is the WWE merchandise schiller of the night.

Tamina Snuka vs. Nikki Bella

Nikki gets thrown around as the announcers plug Total Divas. Tamina bends Nikki over her knee in the most awkward backbreaker you’ll see in a long time. We get more choking and chinlockery before Nikki makes a comeback with a backdrop from her knees and a headscissors where Tamina flipped over when Nikki wasn’t touching her. AJ gets in a cheap shot to put Nikki down, allowing Tamina to hit the Superfly Splash for the pin at 4:18.

Rating: D-. This division sucks but Nikki looks great so it’s not a failure. That is all.

Brie cleans house post match.

WWE 2K14 stuff.

Shield comes in to see Orton, who yells at them for not saving him from Big Show. They say it’s none of his business where they were during Big Show’s attack because they don’t work for anyone.

Fandango vs. Tyson Kidd

This is set up from a clip of a Total Divas episode that hasn’t aired yet. Fandango is in Union Jack tights for no apparent reason. Feeling out process to start until Fandango throws Kidd out of the corner and out to the floor. Back in and Kidd hurricanranas Fandango into the middle buckle. A springboard dropkick sends Fandango to the floor and a bad looking hurricanrana off the apron takes him down again. Back in and a springboard sunset flip is countered into a Fandango rollup for the pin at 2:59.

John Cena vs. Real Americans

Colter runs down England to start, saying that there are some bad people over here, ranging from monarchs to soccer hooligans to, dare he say it, Mr. Bean fans. Swagger goes after the bad arm to start as Cena’s underwear is sticking out. Here’s Del Rio with the Mexican flag as Cesaro throws Cena to the floor. Back from a break with Del Rio on commentary and Cesaro bringing in Swagger for a chinlock.

The running Vader Bomb hits Cena’s knees and John shoulder blocks both guys down, only to run into a European uppercut from Cesaro. The Swing is countered into an STF attempt but Antonio makes the tag off to Swagger. Jack can’t get the Patriot Lock but Cesaro goes up top, only to have his cross body rolled into an AA attempt. Swagger makes the save with a chop block to the leg but Cena backdrops out of a Neutralizer attempt.

Cena hits his finishing sequence on Swagger but the AA is countered into the Patriot Lock. John rolls out and hits the AA but Cesaro breaks up the pin at two. A powerbomb gets two on Cesaro but he comes back with Swiss Death for the same result. Cesaro loads up what looked to be a top rope huricanrana but Cena shoves him into a tag to Swagger. Jack’s running suplex is countered into a top rope cross body from Cena and the STF makes Jack tap at 12:56.

Rating: B-. This was good but was there ever any doubt as to how this was going to end? That’s one of the big problems with matches like this and how far down the Americans have been pushed: no one believed the team had a chance and even though there were some good spots, the ending was never in doubt.

Post match Del Rio goes after Cena and puts him in the armbreaker with a chair around the arm. Big E. Langston makes the save and gets a nice chant from the audience.

Del Rio complains to the bosses about Langston and a match is made for later tonight.

R-Truth vs. Ryback

Truth does an unfunny rap about Ryback on the way to the ring, talking about how Ryback is a bully with bad breath. Truth grabs a headlock to start and kicks Ryback in the face, only to be driven into a few corners. Ryback keeps pounding away with his power stuff, but the Meathook misses, allowing Truth to grab a quick rollup for the pin at 4:00.

Rating: D. And yet they wonder why Ryback isn’t over. He jobs to Punk over and over again, gets a win last week where he gets to show off, and now loses to R-Truth. The match was junk though with no one caring and mostly dominance until the quick ending. I’m assuming Ryback eventually gets his win back though, meaning we’ll be right back where we started.

Big E. Langston vs. Alberto Del Rio

Langston pounds on Alberto but Del Rio comes back with some shots to the head and a chinlock. The fans sound like they’re at a funeral for this match. Langston fights out with suplex and the Warrior Splash as the Wave has begun in the crowd. Del Rio hits the enziguri in the corner but Langston runs him over with ease. The Big Ending is countered into the armbreaker for the submission at 4:04.

Rating: D. GAH WHY DO THEY KEEP DOING THIS NONSENSE??? They want to push Langston as a big deal so their solution is to put him in match after match that he isn’t allowed to win because it would hurt the other guy. SO STOP PUTTING HIM IN MATCHES AGAINST THAT KIND OF COMPETITION ALREADY!!! Why is that so freaking complicated???

Veterans video again.

Axel is with a very damaged Heyman in the ring. Paul is in a neck brace, a cast on his leg and his arm is in a sling while sitting in a wheelchair. He blames Ryback for this beating because Ryback messed up by not being there to save him. Ryback bit off more than he could chew and Punk used the chance to destroy Heyman. However, the real blame is on every fan in the audience for cheering Punk on as he climbed the Cell.

Tonight though, Heyman is here to have every member of the audience as a witness to this statement. He’ll be back with a vengeance and hang over CM Punk like the sword of Damocles. Heyman talks about driving the sword into Punk when Punk’s music hits. Heyman: “OH NO!” Punk charges to the ring and beats up Axel, laying him out with the GTS. CM stares at Heyman and pulls a kendo stick out from under the ring. Heyman is spun around in the chair and then dumped onto the mat so Punk can destroy him with the stick even more. Heyman is also in a back brace to complete the list of injuries.

CM Punk/Daniel Bryan vs. Shield

Punk clotheslines Ambrose down to start before bringing Bryan in for a double suplex for two. Rollins comes in and is almost immediately caught in the surfboard. Punk gets the tag and kicks Seth in the chest for two but the GTS is escaped. Off to Reigns for a staredown but Bryan comes in for some stereo kicks to the legs. Reigns shrugs them off and clotheslines both guys down before taking Bryan into the Shield corner.

Rollins comes in but gets caught in a release German suplex and a top rope hurricanrana gets two. A kick to the head puts Bryan down again and we take our last break. Back with Ambrose working on Bryan in the corner before handing it over to Reigns for a headbutt. Back to Rollins as the slow attack but fast tags continue. A slam puts Bryan down and we hit the chinlock. Bryan fights up and sends Rollins into Reigns, allowing for the hot tag off to Punk.

Everything breaks down and the Macho Elbow gets two on Ambrose. Bryan’s top rope knee takes down Rollins and the FLYING GOAT drops Ambrose. Reigns takes out Bryan but Punk hits a suicide dive to take out Roman. Punk and Ambrose trade some insanely fast counters until Punk hooks the Anaconda Vice. Ambrose is about to tap when we’ve got Wyatts. We’ll say the match was thrown out at about 13:00.

Rating: C+. This took awhile to get going but the last few minutes were hot. Not a great match or anything though as the fans were entirely burnt out by the end. Also it didn’t help that everyone was waiting on the big appearance by the Wyatts but at least they waited until the last possible second.

Punk and Bryan wisely bail to the floor, leaving Shield to argue with the freaky dudes. Bray and Reigns get in an argument on the floor before fighting into the ring. Both teams get in a huge brawl but Bray eventually separates them, saying Punk and Bryan are the common enemies. Punk and Bryan get in the ring for a brawl and get beaten down until the Usos, Goldust and Cody make the save to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This really didn’t do it for me. The constant handicap matches got old in a hurry and the show felt like it didn’t matter at all for the most part. I’m not sure where they’re going with the Shield due to their actions with Orton but turning all three at them at once isn’t the best idea. Nothing at all on here felt important though and that can make for a very long three hours.

Results

Cody Rhodes/Goldust b. Randy Orton via countout

Santino Marella/Los Matadores b. Union Jacks – Cobra to Mahal

Damien Sandow b. Kofi Kingston – You’re Welcome

Curtis Axel b. Dolph Ziggler – Neckbreaker into a faceplant

Tamina Snuka b. Nikki Bella – Superfly Splash

Fandango b. Tyson Kidd – Countered sunset flip

John Cena b. Real Americans – STF to Swagger

R-Truth b. Ryback – Rollup

Alberto Del Rio b. Big E. Langston – Cross armbreaker

Daniel Bryan/CM Punk vs. Shield went to a no contest

 

 

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Smackdown – November 1, 2013: John Cena Is Awesome

Smackdown
Date: November 1, 2013
Location: Tampa Bay Times Forum, Tampa, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the first Smackdown after what I thought was one of the best Raws in a long time. We’re also coming off an eventful PPV which saw Cena and Orton win the titles, meaning there’s a good chance that Cena is here tonight. Tonight will probably have a lot more action rather than the mainly story driven show we got on Monday. That’s exactly how Raw and Smackdown should work if they’re going to have a single roster. Let’s get to it.

We recap Cena winning the title on Sunday.

Here’s Johnny for his first Smackdown appearance in a good while. During the entrance we look at Sandow’s cash in from Monday where he actually had me believing he would win. Cena talks about winning the title on Sunday and says that he and Smackdown are going to get real close very soon. He sucks up to the Tampa crowd and says the World Heavyweight Champion is here.

This brings out the Real Americans of all people with Colter thanking Cena for taking the world title from Alberto Del Rio. He says Cena has a lot in common with the Real Americans such as being a real American hero and supporting the troops, so Cena should join the Real Americans. Colter asks Cena to do the WE THE PEOPLE but instead Cena says you can’t see me. Cena says he sees three dumb people.

Swagger looks like Biff from Back to the Future so he should make like a tree and get out of here. Then there’s Cesaro with his giant swing but all Cena can see are his giant nipples. That leaves Colter, but Cena doesn’t have enough time to make all the jokes he needs. Colter looks like a cross between a drunk Yosemite Sam and the guys from Duck Dynasty. Cena says the Real Americans are the people in the crowd because this is the land of the free and the home of the brave, so everyone can look and sound like anything they want.

Cena tells them to get out of Tampa before violence starts, but here’s a ticked off Sandow before the Americans can respond. John gets ready to fight but Sandow calls him a hypocrite. He says you make your own way in America like he did when he stabbed his best friend in the back to win Money in the Bank. Cena has been handed everything since he got back which makes him a false champion. Sandow is still the uncrowned world champion and his purpose in life is to end the Cena era in the WWE. The heels get ready to swarm but Cody and Goldust come in to even the odds. Vickie, tag match, main event.

We get a Shield promo talking about how the Usos aren’t contenders and how they can beat any team on the planet. Roman is about to talk but Ambrose cuts him off, saying the US Champion and Rollins will prove Shield dominance tonight. The slow burn split has begun.

Shield vs. Usos

Rollins and Ambrose here. This is a result of the Usos helping make the save on Monday night. Jimmy and Dean get us going but Ambrose is quickly dragged to the Uso corner for a double back elbow to the jaw. Dean makes a tag off to Rollins but is easily taken down for a knee drop. Rollins trips Jimmy down though and stomps away as Shield takes over. Seth charges into a backdrop over the top and out to the floor, only to have Ambrose tag him on the way down.

Jey is sent to the floor as well so Roman goes after him. Cue Big E. Langston to stare him down as we take a break. Back with Ambrose holding a chinlock on Jimmy before it’s back to Rollins for a running forearm in the corner. Seth goes to the middle rope but dives into a right hand, allowing for the double tag off to Dean and Jey.

The running Umaga attack in the corner gets a quick two and a jumping kick to the face gets the same. Rollins comes back in and gets caught in a spinebuster. A double superkick knocks Reigns off the apron and as JBL puts it, “WE GOT A FLYING SAMOAN!” Back inside and Jey dives over Amborse into a rollup for the pin at 6:44 shown of 10:14.

Rating: C+. As usual the Usos are good for a solid performance in a tag match. Shield continues to have problems but it could still be awhile before they split. The good thing about them is you can mix up the combinations to keep the story going even longer like they did here. Nice match to open things up.

Post match Shield goes after the Usos but Langston makes the save. Reigns wants to fight all three of them but Rollins and Ambrose hold him back.

We recap the Shawn/Bryan segment from Raw. I still don’t think Shawn is coming back for another match but it’s possible. We also look at the Wyatts attacking Punk and Bryan.

Prime Time Players vs. Wyatt Family

Before the match, Bray appears on screen and says we live in a world of false heroism and he has the cure in the palm of his hand. Ashes, ashes, we all fall down. He stops talking and the Family is in the ring with Bray in his usual place. Rowan throws Darren around with ease before standing on his throat and removing the mask.

Off to Harper for a big boot and a front facelock while rolling around on the mat. Back to Rowan for a neck crank. Harper comes back in to knock Titus to the floor and puts on the front facelock again. Darren finally lunges forward for the tag off to O’Neil who cleans house. Young and Rowan fight to the floor but Harper scores with the discus lariat for the pin on Titus at 3:46.

Rating: D+. Just a squash here with the Wyatts getting to look strong before they head into their big feud with Punk and Bryan. The Players are fine in this role and can move up to challenge for the titles in a low level program if needed. Imagine that: actual tiers in the tag team division.

Darren takes Sister Abigail’s Kiss post match.

We look back at Kane joining the new regime and surrendering his mask to Stephanie on Monday.

Here’s Miz for MizTV which was supposed to have Shawn Michaels as a guest but we get WWE Champion Randy Orton instead. Orton says Shawn isn’t here because Miz is irrelevant and no one cares about his show. He wants to know why this isn’t a celebration of his 11th WWE Championship because Big Show violated the previous one. Due to that knockout, Big Show has been banned from WWE for life. Orton asks Miz how that makes him feel but hits the RKO before Miz can answer. As always, Cole makes it sound like Orton asked for more water at dinner.

Dolph Ziggler shills WWE merchandise.

Bella Twins/Natalya vs. AJ Lee/Alicia Fox/Tamina Snuka

Nikki starts with Alicia and quickly takes her down before bringing in Brie for a Poetry In Motion clothesline. Alicia brings in Tamina for a nice clothesline to take Brie down as the heels take over. Off to AJ for a modified dragon sleeper followed by a guillotine choke. Brie fights out and makes the hot tag off to Natalya who cleans house. AJ comes back with a quick rollup for two as everything breaks down. Natalya grabs a quick Sharpshooter for the submission from AJ at 3:37.

Rating: D+. I guess we’ve moved past the Bellas and onto Natalya now. This is probably going to be the season finale when someone takes the title from AJ because we need to make sure book the wrestling show around a reality show. That being said, I’d take Natalya any day over one of the Bellas.

The Raw ReBound covers the end of the show with Orton’s celebration and Big Show knocking Randy out cold.

We get part of a sitdown interview with HHH where Cole reads from David Otunga’s opinion of Big Show’s lawsuit. HHH gets tired of hearing about it and bans Big Show from the WWE for life. This would be more interesting if Cole hadn’t told us this earlier.

John Cena/Goldust/Cody Rhodes vs. Real Americans/Damien Sandow

Swagger and Cesaro running to the ring like they’re on a battlefield is great stuff. Cody and Cesaro get us going with Rhodes taking over off a shoulder block. Off to Goldust with an elbow drop before it’s quickly back to Cody for a jumping knee to the face. That gets two as well and everything breaks down. We take a break and come back with Sandow working on Cena’s arm before handing it off to Cesaro for the same.

John hurricanranas his way out of what looked like a powerbomb, allowing for the tag off to Goldust. Swagger gets caught by clotheslines and something resembling Stratusfaction before being backdropped out to the floor. Back in and Jack hits a shoulder to the knee and Goldust is in trouble. Cesaro comes in and pounds away before sending Goldie to the floor for a clothesline by Swagger. Off to Sandow for some knees to the chest and a near fall. Back to Swagger for a front facelock as the fans get behind the gold one.

There’s a hard clothesline to take Goldust down and it’s back to Cesaro for a reverse chinlock. A gutwrench suplex gets two for Antonio and it’s back to Swagger as we take another break. Back with Cesaro getting two on Goldust via a suplex and we’re back to another chinlock. Goldust fights up and drives into the corner for the tag to Cena but the referee didn’t see it. I love that spot.

The Real Americans do their Vader Bomb into the double stomp spot for another two count. Goldust finally comes back with a quick DDT to Cesaro but Damien breaks up the hot tag attempt. Sandow’s chinlock is broken up and Goldust heads to the corner for a jumping back elbow which mostly misses. The drop to the knees and uppercut staggers Sandow but he still knocks Cody and Cena to the floor. A powerslam puts Damien down again and NOW we get the hot tag to Rhodes.

Cody comes in with a springboard dropkick to Sandow followed by the moonsault press (he’s gotten much better at that move) for two. Damien counters Cross Rhodes and makes a tag to Cesaro but there Cross Rhodes takes Sandow out anyway. The distraction lets Antonio come in for a 31 second Cesaro Swing to Rhodes for two. During the Swing Cena speared Swagger on the floor so there’s no one for Cesaro to tag.

The second hot tag brings in Cena who initiates his finishing sequence on Cesaro but the AA is countered into the gutwrench suplex. Cesaro loads up the Swing on Cena but Cena counters into an STF attempt. Antonio rolls through and hits Swiss Death, only to have Cody score with a Disaster Kick to the European. Sandow hits You’re Welcome on Cody but gets bulldogged down by Goldust. Swagger gets the tag and suplexes Goldust down before putting Cena in the Patriot Lock. Cena rolls out and hits a quick AA for the pin at 16:58 shown of 23:58.

Rating: A-. If you’re looking for an old school tag team formula match with a hot ending, go find this match immediately. Awesome stuff here with everyone looking good and a great heat segment on Goldust. If there’s anyone out there that can make someone look like a million bucks better than Cena, I’d love to see them, as he gave Sandow his best match ever and now made the Real Americans look competent. Great main event.

Overall Rating: B. Not a lot happened here but after Monday there wasn’t much left to do tonight. This show is reminiscent of some old In Your House shows: nothing special for the first parts but them an awesome main event takes up the last fourth of the show to save most of it. The opening tag match was decent enough and the other tags weren’t that bad so overall this was good stuff.

Results

Usos b. Shield – Rollup to Ambrose

Wyatt Family b. Prime Time Players – Discus lariat to O’Neil

Bella Twins/Natalya b. AJ Lee/Tamina Snuka/Alicia Fox – Sharpshooter to Lee

Goldust/John Cena/Cody Rhodes b. Real Americans/Damien Sandow – AA to Swagger

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume I at Amazon for just $4 at:

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