Smackdown – July 18, 2008: Stiff Trapezoids

Smackdown
Date: July 18, 2008
Location: Time Warner Cable Arena, Charlotte, North Carolina
Commentators: Jim Ross, Mick Foley

It’s the go home show for the Great American Bash and we are getting ready for HHH vs. Edge, which feels something like a major match. On paper it certainly is, but in this case the main story is the continuing saga of Edge and Vickie Guerrero. Naturally things are going well again and now we are probably on the way back towards the wedding. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a long recap of Edge and Vickie Guerrero’s rocky relationship.

And now, the wedding, with Chavo Guerrero as best man and everything seems to go off without a hitch. The reception is tonight and that’s a bit of a twist on the usual formula.

The wedding party is introduced for the reception, with the rest of La Familia and Alicia Fox waiting on the stage. Chavo welcomes Edge to the family and thinks he’ll be perfect with some of that wild side. Edge isn’t THAT wild any more though, as he never even turns his phone off anymore so he won’t miss anything from Vickie. It’s Chavo’s honor to be the best man and he’ll be there when Edge wins the World Title on Sunday. Chavo even has a mock WWE Magazine with Edge as champion on the cover. Edge says Vickie loves her action so let’s get things started.

Finlay/Hornswoggle vs. Curt Hawkins/Zack Ryder

This is a preview of the four way Tag Team Title match at the Bash, also involving Jesse and Festus and Miz/John Morrison. Before the match, Edge says he’s tired of seeing Finlay and Hornswoggle cheating every week, but Hawkins and Ryder are too smart for the water guns and such. So is Edge, who will be the guest referee.

Hawkins and Ryder (and Edge) are in wedding clothes and Edge throws the shillelagh out before the bell. Finlay takes Hawkins into the corner to start but Edge breaks it up, which JR doesn’t see as the best move. Edge’s distraction lets Hawkins hammer away and it’s off to Ryder for a neckbreaker. Finlay fights up and brings in Hornswoggle to clean house but Edge hits a spear on Finlay to give Ryder the fast pin.

Post match Edge heads back to the stage for the first dance with Vickie. Cue Big Show to cut in so Edge gives him a handicap match right now.

Big Show vs. Great Khali/MVP/Shelton Benjamin/Vladimir Kozlov

So how did Edge know those four would be ready to go if this was an impromptu match? Show shoves Benjamin down without much effort to start so MVP comes in. That involves nothing physical whatsoever before it’s off to Kozlov. Show shoves him into the corner without much trouble so Khali tags himself in. A quick clothesline drops Khali and everyone else comes in for the DQ.

Post match the beatdown is on, including the chokebomb from Khali.

Post break Vickie is in the ring (you might be noticing a theme here) to throw the bouquet, with a bunch of women at ringside. Michelle McCool and Natalya get in a fight, with Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder getting rid of McCool. Cherry catches the bouquet, which earns her a match against….Vickie. But only after her first match.

Cherry vs. Natalya

They’re both in dresses and Natalya wins in less than 45 seconds.

Vickie Guerrero vs. Cherry

Vickie pins her in five seconds.

Jimmy Wang Yang vs. The Brian Kendrick

This is the debut of the new Kendrick, complete with a monster named Ezekiel. Kendrick wants nothing to do with this handshake stuff so Yang takes him down with a headlock takeover. Back up and Yang hits a running clothesline to the floor but an Ezekiel distraction lets Kendrick get in a cheap shot. Kendrick starts in on the arm back inside but charges into an elbow in the corner. A missile dropkick gives Yang two so he goes up for the moonsault, only to have Ezekiel offer a distraction. Kendrick slams him down and hits Sliced Bread #2 for the win.

Rating: C+. This was a good enough debut for the new Kendrick, with Ezekiel playing into the finish like a monster enforcer should. Kendrick’s new attitude worked well and there is some potential for him to do something with this. Yang continues to be a solid hand in the ring and is the right choice to put in a spot like this one.

Edge gets a box of Slim Jim’s, saying he’ll show his spicy side later tonight.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Umaga

Kennedy strikes away to start but Umaga gets in a hard shoulder. An even harder clothesline has Kennedy in more trouble and he runs into an elbow in the corner. This lets Umaga get in his variety of stomping/stepping on Kennedy’s head before grabbing the nerve hold. Kennedy’s comeback is cut off by a knee to the ribs and things slow right back down. We hit the nerve hold again before Umaga drops him one more time as we take a break.

Back with Umaga putting on ANOTHER nerve hold as this match will not get going. Kennedy tries to fight up but his slam attempt falls down and we are off to the fourth nerve hold. With Kennedy daring to do something, Umaga uppercuts him right back down as the fans are dying with every boring second of this mess. Kennedy fights back again and actually gets somewhere with right hands and an enziguri for two. The Mic Check is blocked though and the Samoan Spike finishes for Umaga.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t so much a bad match as much as it was terribly dull. The match was less than fifteen minutes long and it included four different nerve holds. The match just wasn’t interesting and it felt like Umaga was doing less than phoning it in. Kennedy can’t do much when his comeback is cut off time after time so the beatdown can keep going. Really dull stuff here.

Edge is in a new Slim Jim commercial.

Miz/John Morrison vs. Jesse and Festus

Non-title. Festus chases Miz and Morrison outside to start as the champs already need a breather. Morrison gets suplexed to start and Festus slams Jesse onto him for two. Back up and Morrison knocks Jesse into the corner as JR compares Morrison to Rick Rude. Jesse gets out of said corner and brings Festus back in to clean house. A Rocket Launcher top rope forearm hits Miz with Morrison having to make a save. Everything breaks down and Miz grabs the Reality Check to pin Jesse.

Rating: C. They kept this one really short and it didn’t do much to get me excited for the four way Tag Team Title match at the Bash. The champs have already beaten one of the teams, so why would I want to see Jesse and Festus getting a title shot? I get not having the champs loses here as they just lost on ECW, but it’s not the best way to go for Sunday.

Raw Rebound.

Great American Bash rundown.

Matt Hardy vs. Jeff Hardy

Non-title and they come to the ring at the same time, though only after hitting Chavo Guerrero with a cake. Respect is shown to start and Jeff goes after the arm. That’s reversed into an arm crank from Matt, who knocks Jeff down. Neither can hit a Twist of Fate so Jeff runs up the corner for the Whisper In The Wind to take over. The slingshot dropkick (that always looks good) gets two but he has to break out of the Side Effect. Jeff knocks him down again, only to miss the Swanton. Matt’s moonsault gets two but La Familia runs in for the DQ.

Rating: C+. This was a weird one as they didn’t want to fight each other and the fans weren’t sure what to do here. The smart move here is that they kept this short, as there was only so much you can get out of a match like this one. The action was good but the vibe was off, which was kind of the point of the whole thing anyway.

Post match the beatdown is on and Edge hits a spear to each Hardy.

Post break La Familia is in the ring so Edge can talk about how much he loves Vickie. He even has a special video package of their relationship, including their time in a park on a seesaw and in, uh, more intimate areas. With that out of the way, here is HHH to interrupt, complete with a big gift box. First though, let’s get this out of the way: no he isn’t secretly married to Vickie.

While he didn’t have the time to get a big special video together, he does have a video of his own. We see a video dated yesterday, showing Alicia Fox coming to see Edge with Vickie nowhere to be seen. Edge is worried about some wedding details so they go over some planning, including food options (uh, that should probably be decided earlier than the day before the wedding). HHH pauses the video and thinks Edge is a bit anxious, so let’s skip to the good part.

Back to the video, with Edge talking about how a white rose symbolizes his love for Vickie. He’s so attracted to scents, including whatever perfume Fox is wearing. She’s not wearing any perfume (cut to a VERY displeased Vickie in the arena) and Edge touches her arm, saying his trapezoid (Fox: “Your what?”) is locking up on him. A slightly nervous looking Fox rubs his neck (Edge: “I think it’s getting a little stiffer.”) but HHH pauses things again.

Edge explains that his neck was flaring up, with HHH saying lots of guys have women massage their necks when their wives aren’t there. An angry Edge sends the troops after HHH, who pulls out gift #2: a sledgehammer. HHH: “It’s one size fits all and there’s plenty for everyone!”

We go back to the video, which now sees Edge rubbing Fox’s back. Edge suggests taking the bra off (Fox isn’t sure) and mentions he went lingerie shopping yesterday, but there was nothing in Vickie’s size. He was told to go to the store for “bigger people” and talks about how big Vickie’s underwear really is. HHH stops the tape again and says this is awkward. He says he didn’t watch this yet, but it kills gift #3: some rather large underwear. HHH: “I can always park my car under it.”

We go back to the video where Edge takes off Fox’s glasses and…she’s going to leave. Edge stops her and they kiss, with Fox certainly approving. Back in the arena, Vickie glares at Edge, Fox looks like she’s about to cry, and Bam Neely is talking to Chavo Guerrero about something. Vickie screams a lot as Edge leaves to end the show. I’m going to assume they ran out of things to air here, as this went nearly 20 minutes and they easily could have accomplished the same thing in half the time.

Overall Rating: C-. It would be an understatement to call this a one note show as the Edge/Vickie stuff went from start to finish, with the villains sitting on the stage almost throughout the night. The wrestling was nothing special with that Umaga vs. Kennedy match being especially dull. Other than the Tag Team Title match, there is nothing important but Edge vs. HHH at the pay per view on the Smackdown side. Pretty weak show this time, though the reaction to Edge kissing Fox (once they got there) was good.

 

 

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Smackdown – July 4, 2008: They Did It Better Than Raw

Smackdown
Date: July 4, 2008
Location: Tulsa Convention Center, Tulsa, Oklahoma
Commentators: Mick Foley, Jim Ross

We’re into the new reality around here as both Night Of Champions and the full Draft are done. There is only one World Champion after Edge lost his title to CM Punk on Raw, meaning HHH is once again on top. Other than that, we should get to see how some of the new stars mesh with what’s left of the old. Let’s get to it.

Here is Night Of Champions if you need a recap.

The opening video looks at the 4th of July and talks about how the wrestlers get to live the American Dream with live action fireworks.

Opening sequence.

We open with MVP’s VIP Lounge. MVP wastes no time in bringing out his guest, the still World Champion HHH. After a nice hello, MVP congratulates HHH on his win at Night Of Champions and welcomes him to Smackdown. It’s been a long time since HHH has been here but he is already a big fan of MVP. HHH appreciates the bling and the Power Ranger outfit that MVP wears when he wrestles.

MVP says it’s cutting edge technology and Olympians wear it to compete. HHH says that sounds like a performance enhancer and MVP might get thirty days off. With that shrugged off, MVP brings up that he makes more money than HHH, who could see how that would make some people angry. Not that it matters as he would rather be a 12 time World Champion rather than the biggest waste of money in Smackdown history.

HHH is out here to get a rub from MVP though and he has some special footage. MVP doesn’t like that, so he says let’s play footage instead. We get a recap of CM Punk winning the Raw World Title and retaining it over JBL in the main event, followed by a brawl with security to end the show. Back in the arena, HHH says Edge got Punked out and MVP says Edge got his punk card pulled.

The jokes continue until Vickie Guerrero, back in the wheelchair, interrupts. HHH wishes her well on her upcoming wedding. HHH: “Imagine: marrying the boss to get ahead. Who thinks up that kind of stuff?” HHH thinks she and Edge just need to go to Vegas because he knows a great drive thru place. You don’t even need to be conscious!

Vickie brags about Edge’s success against Batista, but HHH says looking at her, there are things Edge would do that HHH would never do. Vickie doesn’t get what he means but eventually tells him to shut up. Edge is on his way here and speaking of Edge, HHH will be defending the title against him at the Great American Bash.

Michelle McCool vs. Victoria vs. Cherry vs. Maryse vs. Kelly Kelly

Star on a pole match with the winner facing Natalya, on commentary and now a redhead, for the Divas Title. A quick brawl to start leaves Kelly as the only one standing but Victoria knocks her off the pole. Cherry cuts Victoria off before Maryse has to knock Michelle down. A double electric chair drops Maryse and Cherry catapults Kelly into the corner. Victoria adds the slingshot flipping legdrop to Cherry and goes up. That’s cut off as well so Michelle kicks Maryse down and wins.

Rating: D+. What are you supposed to say about this? It’s the kind of match that is all about one thing and not exactly having much to do with wrestling. This felt like something out of another company and it really doesn’t fit with what they’ve been trying with the women in recent weeks. Michelle finally gets put into the title match, which is long overdue as she has been the obvious pick for a long time now.

Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder come in to see Vickie Guerrero, who wants to know where Edge is. They don’t know, so she asks them about Edge losing the title on Raw. Vickie blames them both and gives them a match with Jesse and Festus. That’s a punishment?

Edge arrives and a lot of people look at him in silence.

Video on Vladimir Kozlov.

Curt Hawkins/Zack Ryder vs. Jesse And Festus

Festus is dressed as Uncle Sam. Hawkins and Ryder jump Festus to start and are quickly shrugged off, setting up a middle rope Hart Attack. Jesse has to fight out of a double team in the corner but gets pulled into another corner to begin the beating. Hawkins grabs a Russian legsweep for two and we hit the neck crank. Jesse is able to get over to the corner for the tag to Festus so house can be cleaned in a hurry. With Hawkins sent to the floor, a seated senton and the fireman’s carry flapjack (with a great sell from Ryder) finishes for Festus.

Rating: C. This was in fact a Jesse and Festus match and that’s about as good as it’s going to get for them. The team isn’t overly interesting and the one joke of Festus losing it at the bell has long since used up its usefulness. It’s not like Hawkins and Ryder are great, but they’re a heck of a lot better than the other choice.

Post match Edge comes to the ring and beats on the catatonic Festus as Hawkins and Ryder make Jesse watch. Edge throws in a nasty chair shot to the head and stares down at Festus.

Post match Vickie Guerrero tries to calm Edge down but even the Great American Bash match doesn’t make it better. Vickie mentions giving him permission and Edge loses it, saying she doesn’t understand what is going on. He has been at this for sixteen years to the day but Vickie cuts him off, saying she is still his boss. She calls him a fool and Edge storms out.

Jeff Hardy vs. John Morrison

Hardy shoves him down to start so Morrison grabs the arm to slow things down. Morrison gets sent outside and a slingshot dive….doesn’t launch as Hardy head fakes him instead, setting up a dive off the apron instead. Back in and Morrison hits a running knee to the face for two but the Flying Chuck misses. Hardy’s slingshot dropkick in the corner is broken up though and Morrison drops him out to the floor in a crash.

We take a break and come back with Morrison working on an armbar before blocking a Whisper In The Wind attempt. The armbar goes back on, allowing commentary to talk about Edge and Vickie Guerrero. Morrison cuts off a comeback attempt by sending him shoulder first into the post but Hardy counters a dive with a sitout powerbomb. Hardy fights up with some forearms and a cradle gets two. The Whisper In The Wind gives Hardy two but Morrison Pele kicks him on top. The Moonlight Drive doesn’t work for Morrison though and it’s the Swanton to give Hardy the pin.

Rating: B-. This was the “Hardy is here and he’s good on his own” match of the show. It worked well with these two showing the same chemistry they’ve had before, with Hardy showcasing his ability to fight from behind. Morrison feels good on his own too, making for a nice match.

Video on Maria.

Umaga vs. Funaki

Umaga wastes no time in knocking him into the corner and a superkick puts Funaki down as well. Foley even goes inter promotional by saying this is like Mark Henry beating up Colin Delaney on ECW. The running hip attack in the corner sets up the Samoan Spike for the squash pin.

Edge is ranting to Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder when he is told that Vickie Guerrero wants to see him. He goes to Vickie’s office, where she goes on about how she is going to be in the wheelchair with back problems for life (keeping in mind that she was standing earlier tonight). Edge says not to talk to her in that gibberish, so Vickie screams at him to GET OUT. That’s exactly what he does, with the door closing behind him. Edge walks a bit, then turns around and tries to get back in, but the door is locked.

US Title: Matt Hardy vs. Mr. Kennedy vs. Chavo Guerrero vs. Shelton Benjamin

Hardy is defending and Bam Neely is here with Chavo. It’s a brawl to start with Matt running Kennedy over but Kennedy is back up with a kick to the face. Kennedy clotheslines Chavo in the corner but Benjamin is back up with a kick of his own. Chavo is back up to take Benjamin down, only to have Benjamin toss him into the air for a nasty crash. Matt and Kennedy put the other two down before knocking each other down as we take a break.

Back with Kennedy cleaning house as Foley compares this to Barack Obama vs. Hilary Clinton. Everyone but Chavo is caught in a Tower Of Doom but Benjamin is up to suplex Chavo down. Neely distracts Benjamin though and Chavo gets to Three Amigos Matt. The frog splash gets two as Kennedy makes the save. Matt hits a quick Twist of Fate on Chavo before dropping Kennedy onto Neely. Benjamin comes in and gets Twist of Fated onto Chavo, with Matt pinning the latter to retain.

Rating: B-. I believe they call this a sprint, as they were packing in whatever they could for about ten minutes. The 4th of July aspect meant that this more or less had to be the main event and it was a good match as a result. Matt retaining is a fine way to go too, even if getting the US Title off of ECW is not a bad idea.

Here is Edge, without music, for a chat. Edge says this will be his first and last statement about what happened on Raw. He was attacked twice on Raw and now he is going to get the World Title back at the Great American Bash. Ever since he came in here tonight, he was feeling the disrespect, including from Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder, who should have been trying to make him happy.

He didn’t even receive the support of Vickie Guerrero, who should be there for him in his time of need. Therefore, Edge is going to let us in on some dirty little secrets, but here is a screeching Vickie (walking) to interrupt. She asks what Edge is doing so Edge walks up to her. Edge says the wedding is off, leaving Vickie to scream a lot and take off her ring to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The wrestling was good enough here (ignoring the stupid women’s match) and having Edge’s breakdown throughout the show made it work better. They have at least a main event set for the Great American bash and there is time to set up the rest of the card. Nice show here, as they didn’t have a bad lull after getting the new roster set up.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – June 30, 2008: The Solution To A Problem

Monday Night Raw
Date: June 30, 2008
Location: Ford Center, Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
Attendance: 9,800
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

We’re done with the Draft and that means things are changing around here in a big way. There are some new stars, but the interesting part is that the top champion is currently the new Intercontinental Champion, Kofi Kingston. Both World Titles are on Smackdown and the ECW Title is in ECW, which means something is going to have to change. Let’s get to it.

Here is Night Of Champions if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Vince McMahon being taken out at the end of Million Dollar Mania.

Shane McMahon joins us to say that since his dad is a private man, we won’t be talking about what happened last week. Everyone here needs to pull together in this time of uncertainty.

Opening sequence.

Here is Jim Ross to get things going. JR is grateful to be here and is thankful for everyone who has come along with him. He is starting a new journey on Smackdown and hopes everyone comes with him as they take the show to places it has never gone before. We also get a special thank you to Jerry Lawler, who JR refers to as his older brother. JR puts Michael Cole over as his successor (the fans boo anyway) before talking about his history here in Oklahoma City. He doesn’t seem too thrilled with Vince McMahon, who is probably a Longhorn fan.

Anyway, he asks we join him on Smackdown and eat more barbecue…but here are Edge, Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder to interrupt. Edge says he had to be here because JR’s arrogance amazes him. Why should anyone care about him? Or the Sooners? Or JR’s relationship with Jerry Lawler? It’s not all bad though, because now JR can come to Smackdown and start his real Hall Of Fame career. Instead of STONE COLD, it’s going to be EDGE WINS!

Edge wants him to try it but JR drops the mic instead. With that, Edge has Hawkins and Ryder escort JR out, leaving him to talk about how Vickie Guerrero and the Undertaker aren’t here. The Shawn Michaels, the John Cenas, the Rey Mysterios and more will never have a shot at the World Title and outside of a Draft show, you will never see him on Raw again. Edge goes to leave but cue Batista to get some revenge for last night. Batista sends him into various things and hits the Batista Bomb inside to leave Edge laying…..AND HERE IS CM PUNK WITH THE BRIEFCASE!

Smackdown World Title: CM Punk vs. Edge

Punk is challenging and hits the GTS to win the title! Well that’s one way to open the show.

Post break we get some replays as commentary hypes up how important that really was.

Mickie James vs. Jillian Hall

Non-title and Mickie is aghast as Jillian’s singing. Mickie knocks her outside to start and hits a slingshot dropkick through the ropes. Back in and Jillian goes after the bad arm before slamming her head first onto the mat. The handspring elbow misses in the corner though and the Mick Kick finishes Jillian out of nowhere.

Here is Rey Mysterio for a chat. First of all, Rey thanks CM Punk for bringing the World Title back to Raw. Rey likes the idea of being on the show but here is Santino Marella to interrupt. Santino officially welcome Rey to Mondays. However, he thinks that Rey is hiding behind the mask because he is ugly, stupid, or Batman. Santino thinks Rey is out for attention and we see a photo of Rey on the cover of WWE Magazine. Why wasn’t Santino’s picture used? We see said photo, which is Santino laid out on a bed with a flower in hand. Santino seems to threaten him so the beating is on, with Rey hitting the 619.

We look at CM Punk winning the World Title again.

Punk is so happy with his win and thanks Batista for the attempt. He thanks as many people as he can remember when JBL interrupts. JBL asks if Punk is proud winning a title that way before asking for a title shot tonight. Works for Punk.

Here is John Cena for a chat. No he didn’t win the title last night but he takes that loss with pride. Losing to HHH showed that they are the two best in the business but that brings us to tonight. CM Punk made history and that was awesome, though JBL tried to steal his spotlight. Cena likes Punk because he has brains and guts so he would have given anyone a title shot. Anyone from Harvey Wippleman to Downtown Bruno to Abe Knuckleball Schwartz to Cena himself.

That’s a good idea, and since there is no boss around here, let’s get Punk out here to make up his own mind. Instead here is JBL to say he’s facing Punk tonight and that he’s declaring MARTIAL LAW in WWE. JBL brings out security to escort Cena out of the building because he more or less runs WWE these days. Security and JBL beat him down and Cena is (finally) carried out. Well that didn’t make Cena look very good.

Cody Rhodes/Ted DiBiase vs. Darren Wade/Steve Anthony

Non-title. Cody takes Anthony down without much effort to start and it’s quickly off to DiBiase for some stomping. The DDT gives Cody the fast pin.

Post match Rhodes talks about how annoying Hardcore Holly was, with his talk about doing things the “right way”. All that got Cody was a job carrying Holly to keep the baby boomer’s career alive. You don’t tell someone as talented as Cody to pay his dues because he couldn’t even focus on himself. So he moved over to a new partner who is young, good looking and dynamic. DiBiase talks about how people under thirty are spoiled but they took matters into their own hands, which makes them….priceless.

Katie Lea Burchill and Paul Burchill talk about how she should be/will be Women’s Champion. He goes to deal with something so here is Jamie Noble to hit on her. Noble plans to go up to the biggest, meanest guy around and go after him. Cue Kane so Noble goes up to him for the threats, including a knock knock joke with a threat as the punchline. Kane sends him running off. Noble comes running into the arena with Kane following. While Noble manages a few shots of his own, the beating doesn’t take long and Noble is chokeslammed onto the announcers’ table.

Intercontinental Title: Chris Jericho vs. Kofi Kingston

Kingston is defending in a rematch after winning the title last night. Before the match, an annoyed Jericho talks about how WWE.com called him Y2 Jaded after he was cheated out of the Intercontinental Title. As for tonight, Shawn Michaels isn’t in the building, which is what Jericho has heard for weeks now. Believe it or not, Shawn is involved in another lie! There is a problem with Shawn’s eye but Jericho is challenging him for the Great American Bash.

With that out of the way, we’re ready to go and we’re joined in progress after a break with Jericho working on a neck crank. Kofi fights up and hits a running forearm into the Boom Drop. Back up and Jericho gets a boot up in the corner, setting up the Lionsault for two. They trade rollups with both using the tights but only Jericho gets caught….and that’s a DQ.

Rating: C. They didn’t have time to do much here but this was about Jericho making his challenge for Shawn Michaels and being all upset. That’s a fine way to go and it makes for a different way to go for Jericho. This is one of the more interesting things on either show at the moment and the match with Shawn should be awesome.

Post match Jericho lays Kofi out.

We look back at the CM Punk title win.

Edge blames Zack Ryder and Curt Hawkins for his loss and tells them to get in the car and drive him away.

Raw World Title: CM Punk vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

Punk is defending and cue JBL’s security as we get going. JBL takes over in the corner to start as the fans are cheering for Cena. Back up and Punk knees him out to the floor, where JBL hits a heck of a clothesline. A boot to the face hits Punk as the fans are getting behind the champ for a change. JBL grabs a sleeper but Punk elbows his way out and gets a boot up in the corner. Punk kicks him in the head and hits the springboard clothesline for two. Cue John Cena and Cryme Tyme to brawl with the security, with the distraction letting Punk hit the GTS to retain.

Rating: C. This was another short match that didn’t exactly make Punk look like a star but he did get the pin. It just might not be the best sign that the fans were chanting for John Cena, though that was kind of the problem with what happened earlier tonight. For now though, it’s a nice enough start for Punk, who played the underdog well here.

Punk gets in on the fight to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. Well this show was all about making CM Punk the new champ and setting up JBL as the top heel against both Punk and John Cena. That might make sense on paper, but there is the fact that it’s JBL getting this much time. He’s in his slow talking phase here and hearing him talk about how rich and powerful he is isn’t going to last long. At the same time, there is the Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho feud, which should be a lot better once Shawn is back.

 

 

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Night Of Champions 2008 (2023 Redo): Gold Only Gets You So Far

Night of Champions 2008
Date: June 29, 2008
Location: American Airlines Center, Dallas, Texas
Attendance: 16,151
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Mike Adamle, Jim Ross, Joey Styles, Tazz, Mick Foley

We’re done with the Draft and this is the final show before we enter the new reality, starting with next week’s TV. Tonight has a pretty stacked card as the focus is on championships, including Edge defending the Smackdown World Title against Batista and John Cena challenging HHH for the Raw World Title. Let’s get to it.

The opening video talks about how important it is to be a champion, with people promising this will be their night. We get more specific looks at the bigger matches as well.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Miz/John Morrison vs. Hornswoggle/Finlay

Miz and Morrison are defending. Finlay and Morrison start things off with an elbow dropping Morrison for a fast two. Back up and Morrison sends him into the corner and out to the floor, where Morrison and Miz grab Hornswoggle. Back in and Hornswoggle wants to fight but Finlay comes in to do it for him so house can be cleaned. Stereo seated sentons hit the champs but Morrison kicks Finlay in the head to take over.

The slingshot elbow/backbreaker combination gets two on Finlay but he’s back with an atomic drop. Hornswoggle tags himself in to pick up the pace until Morrison cheap shots him down. A double clothesline cuts off Hornswoggle’s comeback attempt but Miz misses the charge in the corner. Hornswoggle kicks Morrison away and the hot tag brings Finlay back in. Everything breaks down and Finlay hits the Celtic Cross on Morrison, only to have Miz break up the Tadpole Splash. Morrison slams Hornswoggle off the top to retain.

Rating: C+. This could have been so much worse as Hornswoggle and Finlay worked well together as a team and at least it was a fresh set of opponents for Miz and Morrison. While there aren’t a lot of options for challengers, they have more or less cleaned out the division and it was time to find someone new to come after the belts. Finlay and Hornswoggle did well for a one off challenge and it was a pretty nice match as well.

We look at John Cena beating HHH in the main event of Wrestlemania XXII. They really are making the rematch feel like a huge deal and that’s great to see.

US Title: Chavo Guerrero vs. Matt Hardy

Chavo, with Bam Neely, is challenging. They fight over a lockup to start until Matt gets in a quick takedown. Chavo is right back with a headlock takeover, only to get backdropped to put him down again. With the grappling not working, Chavo starts in on the leg and wraps it around the ropes. Neely helps out by wrapping the leg around the post and Chavo cranks away back inside.

Matt avoids something off the middle rope though and hits a quick Side Effect. The middle rope elbow connects for two so Matt goes up again, only to get pulled into a half crab. That’s broken up but so is the Twist of Fate as Chavo gets the half crab again. Matt makes the ropes so Chavo tries the Three Amigos. That’s countered into the Twist of Fate to retain the title.

Rating: C. As you might have expected, these two worked a completely fine match against each other but it wasn’t the most thrilling. Chavo just isn’t someone who feels like he’s going to win that prestigious of a title, even if Matt is about to take it to ECW. Completely fine match, but nothing that stuck out in any meaningful way.

We look at the end of Million Dollar Mania.

ECW Title: Kane vs. Mark Henry vs. Big Show

Kane is defending and Henry was added after beating Kane on ECW. They start fast with Kane hammering away and avoiding a Henry splash in the corner. Henry is knocked outside, leaving Show and Kane to slug it out. Kane’s running DDT gets two but Show knocks him outside again. Show and Henry get their big showdown, with Henry’s running shoulder having almost no effect. A clothesline and slam put Henry down as trainers come out to check on Kane.

Show drops Henry again but it’s too early for a chokeslam. Instead they collide again for a double knockdown, allowing Kane to come back in. Alternating corner clotheslines set up a whip to send Henry into Show’s raised boot. The double chokeslam plants Henry but Show and Kane argue over who gets the cover. Kane hits an enziguri but Show knocks him out of the air for two. Something close to an Angle Slam gives Show two more so he goes up, only to get superplexed back down. Kane is down as well though and Henry hits a splash for the pin and the title.

Rating: C+. They went with the straight up monster mash formula here and as luck would have it, the people involved know exactly how to do that match. This was a perfectly entertaining match with Henry getting the win that he has deserved after the last few weeks of being a monster. Good stuff here with the right result.

Batista is ready to move to Raw with the Smackdown World Title. John Cena comes in to say he’s winning too, but here is CM Punk to say the Money In The Bank briefcase is getting heavy.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Cody Rhodes/Hardcore Holly vs. Ted DiBiase Jr./???

Rhodes and Holly are defending and DiBiase’s mystery partner is….not here yet, so maybe we can wait ten minutes. That won’t happen so we’ll start the match anyway. Cody starts for the team but DiBiase wants Holly….who gets dropped by Cody with a DDT. DiBiase announces Cody as his partner and gives Holly a cobra clutch legsweep for the pin and the titles. That’s certainly the twist and my goodness it’s better than Holly and Cody’s lame team.

JBL, in a luxury box, is upset that he’s not in a match on the show. Todd Grisham suggests it’s because he isn’t a champion so JBL goes into a speech about how he is successful while the American economy is crumbling. With Vince McMahon gone, he is the richest man in WWE (as we have back to back rich villain segments). He’s also more successful than Mark Cuban (Dallas Mavericks owner) because he doesn’t see any championship banners around here.

JBL mocks the Dallas Cowboys and praises HIS New York Giants, the Super Bowl champions. Everyone loves a champion, and that is why he is Texas’ favorite New Yorker. He’ll be getting a title soon enough. This was slow speaking JBL and that’s not exactly an inspiring change of pace.

Intercontinental Title: Chris Jericho vs. ???

Jericho is defending against a surprise opponent, which will NOT be Shawn Michaels. Since Michaels can’t make a thirty minute light, Jericho is here as an honest man to defend his title. Instead, he’s facing….Kofi Kingston, who came over to Raw in the Supplemental Draft. Lance Cade is here with Jericho, who drives Kingston into the face to start. A headlock takeover puts Kingston on the mat but he’s right back up. Jericho knocks him down again and doesn’t seem too worried to start.

Kingston picks up the pace with the rapid fire leapfrogs so Jericho bails outside, only to be taken down by a slingshot dive. Back in and Jericho dumps Kingston over the top for a big crash, followed by the stomping back inside. A suplex puts Kingston down for two more and Jericho bends his back over the knee. The abdominal stretch goes on but Kingston hiptosses his way to freedom.

Jericho’s belly to back superplex is turned into a crossbody for two and Kingston starts striking way. A clothesline into the Boom Drop gets two on Jericho and a hurricanrana gets the same. Jericho is right back with a knockdown into the Lionsault….but here is Shawn Michaels to superkick Cade. Jericho decks Shawn off the apron but the distraction lets Kingston hit Trouble In Paradise for the pin and the title out of nowhere.

Rating: B-. That was a shock and that’s what they seemed to be trying to do. Shawn costing Jericho the title makes all the sense in the world as it gives Jericho a reason to want to get revenge on him despite Shawn not being able to wrestle. Good match too, as Kingston has that unique offense that makes him fun to watch.

Post match Shawn seems pretty banged up so Jericho hits him in the eye again to leave him laying.

Vickie Guerrero wants to talk wedding flowers with Edge when Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder come in. They say it’s too bad about HHH, who had to help Batista on Smackdown. Otherwise he could have helped Edge tonight, an idea that Edge doesn’t like. We hear Edge’s resume and he promises to keep the title tonight.

Women’s Title: Mickie James vs. Katie Lea Burchill

Katie, with Paul Burchill, is challenging and grabs a rollup for a very fast two. They get back up with Mickie pulling her down by the arm and going up, which sends Katie bailing to the floor. Back in and Mickie kicks her down for two but a trip to the floor lets Katie take over. Katie suplexes her onto the arm to put Mickie in trouble and said arm is sent into the buckle. We hit the armbar and a DDT to the arm gives Katie two. Mickie comes out of the corner with a hurricanrana though and some clotheslines get two. Katie grabs a Fujiwara armbar but Mickie fights out again. Another suplex is blocked and a MickieDT retains the title.

Rating: C-. This could have been on any given Raw and it still would have been just as uninteresting. There is only so much to be gotten out of a match with a not so interesting challenger and such a basic story. It’s far from terrible, but they shouldn’t have even bothered if this was all they were allowed to do.

We recap Edge vs. Batista for the Smackdown World Title. Edge won the title at One Night Stand and Batista wants it. Violence has ensued.

Smackdown World Title: Edge vs. Batista

Batista is challenging and wastes no time in powering Edge down. They head to the floor with Edge being sent into the barricade and shouldered down back inside. A Jackhammer gives Batista two and there’s a clothesline back to the floor as it’ all Batista so far. Batista throws him back in but Edge manages a posting for a much needed breather.

Edge Chokes on the ropes and drops an elbow on the apron but Batista slugs his way out of trouble. A swinging neckbreaker puts his right back in trouble though and Edge grabs the chinlock. Back up and Batista gets sent face first into the buckle, followed by a neckbreaker (non-swinging edition). That means we can hit the chinlock again but Batista is back up faster this time.

Edge gets taken down by a hard clothesline and we get a double breather. The spear gives Batista two and a powerslam puts him down again. Edge is right back with a much needed Edgecution but Batista knees the spear away. Batista goes up, only to get dropkicked out of the air to leave them down again.

Cue the Edgeheads with Vickie Guerrero as Batista hits the spinebuster, meaning Vickie has to make the save. Edge decks the referee so Vickie calls out another referee…and gets Chavo Guerrero (with Bam Neely). Batista grabs Vickie and throws her over the top and onto the pile, but Edge gets in a belt shot. Chavo counts the (actually not fast) pin to retain the title.

Rating: B-. The match was good for the most part, but then the ending was about as lame and uninspired of a choice as they could have had. It was just another La Familia run in ending, with the really slow count from the referee being the only thing missing. Granted almost none of this matters as Batista is on his way to Raw anyway, but I was hoping for more.

Batista gets the big emotional sendoff, which loses some of its impact when you keep in mind that he’ll be back tomorrow night.

HHH is ready to right the wrong of two years ago.

We recap HHH vs. John Cena for the former’s Raw World Title. This is billed as the biggest match Raw can have and goes back to HHH losing to Cena in the main event of Wrestlemania XXII. The build has gone well and it really does feel like a top level match.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. John Cena

Cena is challenging. HHH’s headlock doesn’t get him anywhere to start as Cena runs him over with a shoulder. A hiptoss works better for HHH so Cena grabs a headlock of his own. That works just as well so Cena hits another shoulder and the release fisherman’s suplex gets two. The flying shoulder misses though and Cena crashes out to the floor. Back in and Cena hits a suplex as the pace slows back down.

Cena fight back again and hits the ProtoBomb but the Shuffle is broken up. HHH hits the jumping knee but Cena is right back with the Throwback. Another Shuffle is cut off by another jumping knee but Cena sends him flying over the corner. HHH comes up holding his leg so Cena is right on it, including a wrap around the post. It’s too early for the STFU as HHH makes the ropes so HHH hits a desperation Pedigree for a delayed two.

Cena grabs an FU for the same and they’re both down. Back up and they slug it out until Cena hits another ProtoBomb. The Shuffle is blocked again and HHH tries a Pedigree, only to be reversed into the STFU. HHH goes for the rope so Cena pulls him back, allowing HHH to counter into a Crossface. Cena manages to stand but the FU is countered into the Pedigree for the pin.

Rating: B. This was a strange match as it sent over twenty minutes and definitely felt like a major fight, but it felt like they were only getting started when HHH got the pin. For once this could have gone for another five to ten minutes to really get going. The HHH leg stuff could have been something but it wasn’t really given time to develop. It’s not something that is said very often, but HHH needed more time for a change.

Replays and posing take us out.

Overall Rating: B-. It’s a good show but nothing you really need to go out of your way to see. The main event is the best thing on the show and even then it’s not a match you really need to see. They had an easy theme here with all of the title matches but even then, only the Tag Team Titles and the Intercontinental Title changes felt like moments, and even they were on the lower end of things. Overall, it’s certainly not a bad show, but they hyped it up as this major event and it just wasn’t.

 

 

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Smackdown – June 27, 2008: Find Your Balance

Smackdown
Date: June 27, 2008
Location: Toyota Center, Houston, Texas
Attendance: 14,748
Commentators: Jim Ross, Mick Foley

The Draft has come and gone and now we have a new lineup around here. Some of the moves should make for some nice changes, though this is also the go home show for Sunday’s Night Of Champions. It should be interesting to see what happens with the new stars and the old stories, though Night Of Champions could be quite the endpoint for a lot of stuff. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Draft recap.

Vickie Guerrero is rather sad as we hear about Vince McMahon nearly being crushed during Million Dollar Mania. She hopes Vince isn’t confined to a wheelchair like she is. That moves us on to how great Smackdown is, because she and Edge are getting married soon. With that out of the way, here’s new broadcaster Jim Ross!

Here is HHH to get things going. He talks about how crazy Vince McMahon is and makes jokes about how everything came crashing down on him. Anyway, for the first time in six years, he’s part of Smackdown and he sees the familiar faces of Mick Foley and Jim Ross. HHH says jr would be the one person he would pick to bring here with him (JR: “Thank you.”) so he’s home.

HHH gets in the self described sucking up to the fans before getting to the self described shilling of Sunday’s pay per view. The title is what matters so here is Edge to interrupt. Edge says this is special and big because the two best around are in the ring. He’s heard rumors that they can’t get along but Edge thinks they can make it work. HHH says they both have massive egos and he can see that his is way bigger than Edge’s.

The other difference: HHH will still be champion after Night Of Champions. Edge points out that he can actually beat Batista, unlike HHH. This is Edge’s house and show, so HHH needs to show him some respect. Cue Batista to interrupt and spear Edge down without much trouble. Batista even steals the title for a bonus. That was kind of a cool segment, with the mini Evolution reunion working.

Kane/Big Show vs. MVP/Mark Henry

Henry has been added to the ECW Title match at Night Of Champions after beating Kane on ECW. Kane and MVP start things off with the latter kicking away at the legs until an uppercut drops MVP. It’s off to Show to unload in the corner and knock MVP down without much effort. Henry comes in to cut off the power advantage so it’s right back to Kane. It doesn’t go so well this time around as Henry takes him into the corner for a boot to the head from MVP. Kane fights up so MVP tells Henry to do this himself and leaves…but Henry throws him back inside. The chokeslam gives Kane the fast pin.

Rating: C. Not a bad match here and Kane continuing his dominance of MVP is amusing for some reason. It makes sense to keep everyone but MVP strong as MVP doesn’t exactly have much going on at the moment. This was more about letting Kane get some heat back after his loss to Henry on ECW and it worked just fine all things considered.

Vickie Guerrero discusses wedding plans with Alicia Fox but Edge interrupts. Vickie tells him to not worry about Batista because he’ll be gone. He’ll even get the title back tonight.

Video on Umaga.

Finlay/Hornswoggle vs. Curt Hawkins/Zack Ryder

Ryder drives Finlay into the corner to start but an atomic drop breaks that up in a hurry. Hawkins comes in and misses a baseball slide, allowing Finlay to unload with forearms. Back up and Finlay sends Hawkins outside, setting up the Celtic Cross to Ryder. The Tadpole Splash finishes for Hornswoggle.

Post match Miz and John Morrison come out for the staredown.

Matt Hardy vs. Edge

Non-title. They fight over wrist control to start until Edge grabs a drop toehold to continue to technical opening. Back up and Matt hits the running corner clothesline into the bulldog for two as commentary isn’t sure if that would be an upset (yes, it would be). We take a break and come back with Matt blocking the Edge-O-Matic. Edge gets sent outside and Matt nails a clothesline off the apron but a cheap shot cuts Matt off back inside.

Choking on the ropes sets up a running crotch attack to the back of the neck and Edge kicks him in the chest. The cravate has Matt in more trouble but he fights up and grabs the Side Effect for two. That lets Foley get in a Get Smart reference, making him all the more swell. A DDT gives Matt two but he misses the moonsault. Edge misses the spear but gets two off a backslide with his feet on his rope. Back up and the Twist of Fate is countered into the spear to give Edge the pin.

Rating: B-. These two always work well together and the ending sequence was good. I’m not wild on seeing the US Champion losing but at least it was to someone higher up on the food chain. Edge gets some momentum heading into his title match on Sunday while Matt…eh he’s defending against Chavo Guerrero so he’ll be fine.

Night Of Champions rundown.

Kelly Kelly/Michelle McCool/Cherry vs. Victoria/Natalya Neidhart/Maryse

Michelle and Maryse start things off with Michelle cranking on the arm. Maryse immediately bails out to bring Victoria in, with Kelly coming in as well. Foley remembers wearing chaps like Kelly and JR backs away as fast as he can. Cherry comes in and bulldogs Kelly for two as they’re rapid firing through the tags. It’s back to Michelle for a basement dropkick on Natalya, who is right back with the a wheelbarrow hot shot. The surfboard has Michelle in more trouble, followed by the chinlock.

That’s broken up with a chinlock but Victoria comes in to cut Michelle off again. The standing moonsault gives Victoria two as Foley wants to see more of Kelly’s chaps. Foley: “I’m just trying to give you a little Jerry The King Lawler JR.” Kelly gets in a kick to the ribs, setting up one of the most freezing cold tags I’ve ever seen as Cherry comes in. A neckbreaker gets two on Maryse but Natalya gets in a cheap shot from the apron. Everything breaks down and Maryse rolls Cherry up for the pin.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t exactly good and I have no idea why they haven’t just announced Michelle for the title match yet. She’s the most obvious pick they could have but they’re still playing the “who is it going to be” nonsense. Am I supposed to believe that Cherry is getting a title shot? Anyway, this match was pretty lame, as it was almost Michelle in a handicap match.

Vladimir Kozlov vs. Domino

Kozlov powers him into the corner to start and works on the arm. A shot to the chest sets up an overhead belly to belly suplex but Domino manages to drop him with a jumping elbow. Back up and Kozlov kicks him in the face, setting up the reverse DDT for the pin, though he had to work a bit more here.

Rey Mysterio, on the way to the ring for his final Smackdown appearance, runs into Hornswoggle for some odd…uh, looking at each other.

Here is Rey Mysterio for his final Smackdown appearance. He came to Smackdown six years ago with a heart full of dreams. Thanks to the fans, he became Cruiserweight Champion, Tag Team Champion and the World Heavyweight Champion. Smackdown will always have a place in his heart but now he is heading to Raw. The fans are offered to come along with him and we get some nice words in Spanish to wrap things up.

Batista vs. Umaga

Umaga runs him over to start and then breaks up an early Batista Bomb attempt. A splash gives Umaga two and there’s a hard kick to the back of Batista’s head. Batista gets whipped hard into the corner and we hit the nerve hold. Umaga cuts off the comeback with a kick to the face and a jumping headbutt puts him down again. We’re off to another nerve hold but Batista fights up. A slam attempt doesn’t work so Umaga knocks him back into the corner to hammer away some more. Umaga misses a splash and hits the ring post though and there’s the spinebuster. Cue La Familia to jump Batista for the DQ.

Rating: C-. Not the most exciting match here as Umaga almost squashed him until the run-in ending. Umaga needed the boost after spinning his wheels for a long time, though having him do this to the #1 contender was a little strange. The bigger problem here was the match being rather slow though as these two have never had much chemistry together.

Post match the big beatdown is on but HHH makes the save to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. There were some good parts here but it wasn’t their best show. The problem is they were trying to build to the show with the old lineup but then had to introduce the new wrestlers. That made for a weird balance and they only kind o pulled it off. Things will be in their new normal next week though and that should make things a lot better.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – June 23, 2008 (WWE Draft): Three At Once!

Monday Night Raw
Date: June 23, 2008
Location: AT&T Center, San Antonio, Texas
Attendance: 15,183
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Mick Foley, Mike Adamle, Tazz

It’s a big night as we have three things going on at once. We have a three hour show with the major focus being the annual Draft, with the focal point being that EVERYONE is available to be drafted. Other than that, Million Dollar Mania is still going so expect a lot of Vince McMahon. Finally, it’s also the last Raw before Night Of Champions. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Commentary welcomes us to the show and hype up the idea of everyone being switched around.

HHH (Raw) vs. Mark Henry (Smackdown)

Non-title and it seems that the winning brand gets a Draft pick. Henry yells a lot and HHH looks nervous, with Henry running him over to make it worse. The headbutts rock HHH some more and Henry runs him over for an early two. A Vader Bomb gets two more and Henry grabs the neck crank. HHH finally slips out and tries some running forearms to stagger Henry. The facebuster sets up more right hands and the jumping knee finally puts Henry down. The Pedigree is countered into the World’s Strongest Slam for two but Henry misses the splash. That’s enough for the Pedigree to give HHH the pin.

Rating: C. There was only so much that HHH could do here and he made it work as well as possible. Henry is a big monster and the Pedigree was only going to look so good, but HHH trying to knock him down was a nice sequence. For a quick match, they did about as well as they could have, with Henry being a fine monster.

Drafted to Raw: Rey Mysterio.

Here is Vince McMahon to announce that tonight, five people will win $100,000 and one will win $500,000. Vince brings out Kelly Kelly to help him and they call a woman….who Vince says gives the wrong password. Kelly says it’s right though and gives us a celebratory dance.

HHH welcomes Rey Mysterio to Raw when John Cena comes in. Rey leaves so HHH can say he’s not losing to Cena again at Night Of Champions. HHH says nothing Cena has done matters until Cena beats him for the title.

Finlay/Hornswoggle (Smackdown) vs. Carlito/Santino Marella (Raw)

For a draft pick. Santino wants Hornswoggle to start and gets Stunned for his efforts. Finlay comes in and ties Santino up in the ring skirt for the beating. A Carlito cheap shot puts Finlay down though and the villains take over. Santino gets caught with the shillelagh and it’s the Celtic Cross into the Tadpole Splash for the pin.

Drafted to Smackdown: Jeff Hardy.

Hardy comes out to pose and we see the still injured Randy Orton watching backstage.

Vince McMahon brings out Randy Orton to help give away more money. First though, Orton warns HHH and John Cena that he’s coming back for the WWE Title. Actually that’s it for Orton, who isn’t in the mood to help give away money. Vince is in the mood to do that, but he’ll also give us a great main event tonight: Cena vs. Edge.

Hardcore Holly/Cody Rhodes (Raw) vs. Chavo Guerrero/Bam Neely (ECW)

For a draft pick and Ted DiBiase Jr. is on commentary to promote his dad’s book. Neely jumps Cody to start and the stomping is on in the corner. Chavo comes in but Cody escapes a belly to back suplex and hands it off to Holly as the crowd is almost eerily silent. Holly hits the hanging kick to the ribs but the Alabama Slam is broken up. Chavo headscissors Cody to the floor, only to walk into the Alabama Slam for the fast pin.

Drafted to Raw: CM Punk. It’s about time.

Here is Chris Jericho for a chat. Jericho is used to fans throwing trash at him, but he’s just waiting for Shawn Michaels to turn on the fans like he does with everyone else. We see a highlight package of Shawn turning on people over the years, including Marty Jannetty, Diesel, Hulk Hogan and John Cena.

Then we move into Shawn faking his knee injury, which has Jericho talking about all of Shawn’s lies. Jericho hates lies more than anyone else, save for maybe one person: the man who helped Jericho against HHH last week, Lance Cade. We see Cade on the Titantron, where he talks about how he was trained by Shawn Michaels and wasn’t going to give Shawn the chance to turn on him.

Jericho never lied to him, but now Jericho needs a person to face for the Intercontinental Title at Night Of Champions. It would have been Shawn, but we see Jericho massacring him. Cue Shawn, with his eye taped up, to go after Jericho. Shawn slugs away, until Jericho sends him eye first into the announcers’ table to cut him off immediately. That match is going to have some crazy heat.

We recap the Draft picks to date.

John Morrison/Miz (ECW) vs. Curt Hawkins/Zack Ryder (Smackdown)

Vickie Guerrero introduces Hawkins and Ryder, but recent developments have made her change her mind. Here’s the new match:

John Morrison/Miz (ECW) vs. Jeff Hardy/Matt Hardy (Smackdown)

Non-title but for a Draft pick. Matt and Miz start things off as Cole talks about how great this was from Vickie Guerrero. Matt’s wristlock and headlock don’t get very far as Miz takes him into the corner for the left hands. That’s broken up as well so Matt hits a clothesline and hands it off to Jeff for Poetry In Motion. The slingshot dropkick hits Miz in the corner but Morrison gets in a cheap shot to take over.

Morrison grabs a chinlock and then it’s off to Miz for, uh, another chinlock actually. Jeff fights up but Miz runs him over again for two. A legdrop gives Miz two more and we hit a crossface chickenwing. Jeff fights up and nails a quick Whisper In The Wind to put them both down. The diving tag brings in Matt to clean house, including the Side Effect for two on Morrison. The middle rope legdrop connects but Morrison is right back up with a rollup (and tights) for the pin.

Rating: C. This felt like it was supposed to be a low level dream match but it was pretty dull for the most part. There were some good moments with Matt’s comeback working well, but you’re only going to be able to get so far with an eight minute match and a pretty abrupt ending. At least ECW got something though.

Drafted to ECW: Matt Hardy (with the US Title).

Vince McMahon recaps Million Dollar Mania and brings out Ric Flair to help him give away $100,000. Flair calls and the fan wins the money, plus a bonus WOO!

We look at Mickie James participating in the Dreams Take Flight charity event.

Mickie James/Melina (Raw) vs. Natalya Neidhart/Victoria (Smackdown)

For a Draft pick, but only announcers/interviewers are eligible. Natalya grabs a front facelock on Melina to start before a powerslam gets two. Victoria comes in and drives Melina into the corner but Melina rolls her up for two more. Back up and Victoria sends her off the top for a crash to the floor, where Melina looks banged up. Mickie goes over to check on her but the brawl is on for the double DQ.

Drafted to Smackdown: Jim Ross. To say he does not look happy with this would be an understatement.

Drafted to Monday Night Raw: Michael Cole.

Post break we see Melina being taken out of the arena as she seems to have suffered a rather bad leg injury.

Vince McMahon brings out Great Khali to plug his new movie Get Smart, which also features Dwayne Johnson. Khali calls someone who says “wrong number” and hangs up. Someone else answers, tells Vince to hang on and brings on someone else to give the password (Khali looks mad and yells a lot) but the guy wins (and sounds bored).

John Cena (Raw) vs. Edge (Smackdown)

Non-title but for a Draft pick. Jim Ross isn’t sure why he’s calling a match involving a Raw competitor (oh yeah this isn’t going well) as they fight over a lockup to start. Cena sends him into the corner but misses a running bulldog, allowing Edge to score with a big boot. Edge slugs away as Foley is handling most of the commentary. A hard clothesline drops Cena again as JR talks about how he didn’t expect to leave Raw tonight but that’s how the cards were dealt.

Cena comes back with a shot of his own for two but it’s a double clothesline to put them both down. It’s Cena up first to start the comeback until Edge escapes the FU into the Edgecution for two. The spear is countered into the STFU, sending Edge over to the ropes rather quickly. Edge goes up top but has to escape a super FU, allowing him to knock Cena outside. Cena catches him diving off the apron though and decks Edge, who takes the countout.

Rating: C+. These two always have good chemistry together and anything they do is at least worth a look. At the same time, the result was one of the only options they had, as you don’t want either of them losing heading into a World Title match on Sunday. They didn’t have much time here, but what they did was pretty nice while it lasted.

Post match Batista throws Edge inside for a beating.

Drafted to Raw: Batista. Well that’s convenient timing.

Post break Edge and Vickie Guerrero are glad with their win because Batista is out of their hair. Vince McMahon comes in to say the title match is still on for Night Of Champions. This might have had a bigger impact if Michael Cole hadn’t said the same thing before the break. Vince suggests Vickie and Edge could be split up and panic ensues.

MVP (Smackdown) vs. Tommy Dreamer (ECW)

For a Draft pick.  Colin Delaney is here with Dreamer, who gets punched in the ribs and kicked in the head to start. They trade right hands as commentary seems way off here, with Mick Foley joining in and talking about a Playboy Playmate. Tazz: “You know there is a match going on.” MVP misses a charge in the corner and gets hit with a bulldog. Not that it matters as MVP hits a running boot in the corner for the pin.

Drafted to Smackdown: Umaga. Cue Umaga to beat up Dreamer and Delaney.

Draft recap.

John Bradshaw Layfield (Raw) vs. Kofi Kingston (ECW)

For a Draft pick. JBL grabs a headlock to start but Kofi is back up with the jumping back elbow. With the jumping getting on JBL’s nerves, he kicks Kofi in the face to take over. Something close to a cobra clutch keeps Kofi in trouble and the clubbing forearms to the back make it even worse. The bearhug goes on but Kofi sends him into the corner to escape. A dropkick looks to set up the Boom Drop but the Clothesline From JBL finishes Kofi.

Rating: C+. This took some time to get going but there was something good about having Kofi using his weird style and JBL just hitting him in the face over and over. Kofi is still someone who is on his way up and needs to be in there against bigger competition. Fun little match here, and Kofi feels like he is on the way up.

Drafted to Raw: ECW Champion Kane.

Vince McMahon gives away more money…..and the fan happens to be here in the arena.

Night Of Champions rundown.

Battle Royal

Raw: CM Punk, HHH, Kane, John Cena, Batista

ECW: Matt Hardy, John Morrison, Miz, Chavo Guerrero, Shelton Benjamin

Smackdown: Big Show, Edge, Jeff Hardy, Great Khali, MVP

For two Draft picks and that’s one heck of a lineup. We’re joined in progress after a break and a bunch of people get together to toss Khali. Everyone looks at Show who tells them to bring it and then knocks a bunch of them down. Miz can’t get rid of Edge but Batista can get rid of Miz and Morrison at the same time.

Show and MVP send Punk over the top but not out as this is not the most thrilling stuff despite the names involved. Edge fires off some spears and we take a break. Back with Punk having been eliminated and HHH hitting a facebuster on Show. Matt gets the same thing and Jeff enziguris Chavo out. That leaves Matt as the sole ECW star as Benjamin seems to have been tossed during the break as well.

There goes MVP and we get the Hardys showdown. Jeff gets the better of things and kicks Matt out to officially finish off ECW. Edge and Batista both try spears and they’re both down in a heap. Jeff misses Whisper In The Wind and HHH knocks him out and it’s HHH, Cena, Batista (very bloody), Kane, Show and Edge left.

Batista spears Edge but gets punched out by Show. Kane is knocked out as well and it’s two vs. two. Show manages to suplex Edge and Cena at the same time, leaving everyone down. HHH and Cena get back up and dump Show but Edge knocks Cena into HHH to get rid of him. Cena is so shocked that Edge is able to toss him for the win.

Rating: C. The ending got better, but there were some long stretches with pretty much nothing going on here. That isn’t the best way to draw up interest in the match but at least the star power was on display. I was expecting ECW to win to finally get a little something else, though that would imply WWE cares about ECW in any meaningful way.

Drafted to Smackdown: Mr. Kennedy and HHH (Raw World Champion).

We go up to Vince McMahon, who gives away $500,000…..and then the stage collapses. Vince is crushed under a part of the set and yells for Paul because he can’t feel his legs to end the show.

Raw
Rey Mysterio
CM Punk
Michael Cole
Kane
Batista

Smackdown
Jeff Hardy
Jim Ross
Umaga
Mr. Kennedy
HHH

ECW
Matt Hardy

Overall Rating: C+. As you might have guessed, this wasn’t the most traditional show, as they were trying to do a lot of things at once. Between the Draft and the money and hyping up Sunday’s show, this was a bit too all over the place. The Draft was the big focus and some of the moves should shake things up a bit, though ECW is gutted even more than before. Above all else though, I feel sorry for Jim Ross, who gets treated badly again, because Vince McMahon enjoys it or something.

 

 

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Smackdown – May 2, 2008: That’s A Good Reason

Smackdown
Date: May 2, 2008
Location: Boardwalk Hall, Atlantic City, New Jersey
Commentators: Mick Foley, Michael Cole

We’re done with Backlash and Undertaker beat Edge again to retain the World Title. That leaves us on the road to Judgment day and odds are the trilogy match between the two is on the horizon. Other than that we are going to need something else around here and we might start that this week. Let’s get to it.

Here is Backlash if you need a recap.

Here is Teddy Long to get things going with a big announcement: the Tag Team Titles, the United States Title and the Smackdown World Title will be defended. It was a bigger announcement when I heard it on ECW but Long’s voice helps anything.

Opening sequence.

Mick Foley is brought out as the new commentator and seems to be popular.

Tag Team Titles: Miz/John Morrison vs. Jimmy Wang Yang/Shannon Moore

Yang and Moore are challenging and I almost had that written down before they came to the ring. Why? Well they’ve lost to Miz and Morrison a few times already and that just isn’t enough to prove a point in 2008 WWE. Moore takes Miz down for a fast two and a legdrop is good for the same. Morrison comes in and gets dropped with a spinning middle rope crossbody for two. Yang sneaks in for two off a dropkick but Morrison pulls him off the ropes to take over for the first time.

It’s back to Miz to grab a chinlock, followed by the running corner clothesline for two. The backbreaker/slingshot elbow combination gives Morrison two more and it’s back to Miz for the seated abdominal stretch. An enziguri gets Yang out of trouble though and the hot tag brings in Moore to clean house. Everything breaks down and Moore’s rollup gets two but the Moonlight Drive (apparently the debut of the name) drops Moore to retain the titles.

Rating: C+. It dragged a bit in the middle but these teams have chemistry together. That being said, it was hard to imagine Moore and Yang winning the titles in the first place and now the best thing we can do is enjoy matches without much drama about the result. The division still barely exists, so can we please get some depth going sooner than later?

ECW GM Armando Estrada introduces the next match.

Colin Delaney vs. Vladimir Kozlov

In a rare instance, neither of them have entrance music. Kozlov knocks him around with ease to start and hits a big boot to the chest. Delaney is sat on top and then thrown back down in a big crash. The reverse DDT finishes fast, with Estrada, who faces Delaney on ECW with Delaney’s future on the line, being rather pleased.

Mark Henry threatens Nunzio with pain during their match tonight.

Natalya/Victoria vs. Michelle McCool/Cherry

This was set up with some patented backstage cattiness. Natalya headlocks Michelle down to start and it’s quickly off to Victoria. Michelle pulls her off the ropes for a crash before a monkey flip puts Victoria down again. Cherry comes in with a high crossbody for two but Natalya trips her down like a villain should. The double teaming is on but Cherry manages to crawl over (despite Natalya holding her foot) for the tag to Michelle. A swinging neckbreaker gets two on Natalya but Victoria shoves Michelle off the top. The crash is enough for Natalya to grab a rollup, with tights, for the pin.

Rating: C. The best thing I can say about this, and most of Smackdown’s women’s matches as of late, is that it felt like a match. It wasn’t the stereotypical Divas stuff, but rather a completely acceptable match. Michelle has come a long way in a short amount of time and I would assume a lot of that is due to working with a veteran like Victoria. That is a great benefit to have and if that is what it is, it seems to be paying dividends.

We look back at Undertaker retaining the World Title over Edge at Backlash but not letting go of the choke. Edge went out on a stretcher and Vickie Guerrero screamed a lot.

Mark Henry vs. Nunzio

Nunzio seems to know he’s about to be in extreme pain….so he brings out Big Show to be in his corner. Nunzio kicks away and it goes as well as you would expect. Henry shove shim into the corner and the World’s Strongest Slam finishes fast.

Post match Big Show gets in the ring and Henry backs off. Show tells him to pick on someone his own size. So not Show, who is 50lbs heavier and eight or so inches taller?

US Title: MVP vs. Matt Hardy

Matt is defending after beating MVP to take the title at Backlash. The referee holds the title up so MVP pulls it away, apparently feeling that it’s his. Matt headlocks him down to start and then does it again for a bonus. Back up and MVP takes it into the corner, followed by a heck of a clothesline. A slightly angrier than usual MVP hammers away and we hit the chinlock with a facelock.

Matt fights up and manages a bulldog for two, setting up the fourth headlock takeover in about five minutes. Since it’s just a headlock, MVP pops up and gets punched in the face for his efforts. The running crotch attack against the ropes gives Matt a weird looking cover for two but MVP clotheslines him down again. Matt gets knocked hard off the apron and into the barricade as we take a break.

Back with MVP holding a cross arm choke and then slapping on another choke to make it worse. This time Matt fights up and grabs a tornado DDT but MVP hits the running kick to the face in the corner to knock him silly. We’re off to a crossface chickenwing of all things but Matt is back up to slug away. A very out of nowhere Twist of Fate retains the title.

Rating: B-. This was a more aggressive MVP and that style worked well for him. There was almost no way Matt was losing his title so soon after winning it, but this feud certainly deserved a long rematch. I could go for more of the aggressive MVP though as it was easier to take him more seriously. Good stuff here and the best match on the show so far.

Mick Foley is in the ring and brings in Batista, who lost to Shawn Michaels following Shawn injuring his knee. Batista respects Shawn and while he doesn’t like some things Shawn has done, it was Batista’s fault for letting his guard down. We see a clip from the Highlight Reel on Raw, with Chris Jericho accusing Shawn of faking a knee injury. That idea makes Batista sick to his stomach and he hopes Shawn is hurt. If he isn’t, he will be when Batista sees him. As usual, short form Batista is the best Batista and he got his point across fast here.

Jesse & Festus vs. Curt Hawkins/Zack Ryder

Festus starts hammering on Hawkins to start and drives some knees to the ribs. As Foley tries to figure out which one is biscuits and which one is gravy, Jesse takes over in the corner. It’s off to Ryder, who takes Jesse into the corner. The neck crank goes on for a bit before Ryder gets two off a neckbreaker. Jesse belly to backs his way to freedom and brings Festus back in to clean house. A splash hits Ryder but Hawkins offers a distraction, allowing Ryder to get in a shot to the throat. Jesse has to come back in and the neckbreaker faceplant gives Hawkins the fast pin.

Rating: C. It’s not easy to get into these matches anymore as it feels like these same teams have been fighting for months now without getting anywhere. Someone solving Festus isn’t the best sign for his future, but it’s even worse for Jesse’s, who only exists as Festus’ partner. Not a bad match, but the tag division outside of Miz and Morrison only feels like filler these days.

Finlay vs. Julio Dinero

Finlay drives a shoulder in the corner to start and drops Dinero with a clothesline. Back up and Dinero is sent outside as Hornswoggle pops out from underneath the ring. A backdrop and the Celtic Cross complete the squash to give Finlay the win.

Post match Hornswoggle hits a Tadpole Splash.

Smackdown World Title: Great Khali vs. Undertaker

Undertaker is defending…or he isn’t, as Vickie Guerrero comes out to say not so fast.

In recent weeks, Undertaker has injured a lot of people with his illegal choke. Therefore, the choke is banned and since Undertaker shows no remorse, the title is vacated. Since Undertaker won’t hand it over, Vickie sends Great Khali down to get it. Khali goes to get it and is kicked in the face. Undertaker grabs the choke as Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder come down to get the title. The choke stays on so long that Khali is bleeding from the mouth as Undertaker lets go to end the show. That’s certainly a twist and at least gives them a better reason for Edge vs. Undertaker to continue aside from “Vickie says so.”

Overall Rating: C+. The twist ending boosts this up a bit as it makes things that much more intriguing. Unlike Raw, this didn’t feel as much like we’re heading for Backlash II later this month with Judgment Day. Focusing on the titles all night long is not a bad idea, and the MVP vs. Matt Hardy match was good enough for the show’s long wrestling segment. Nice enough show here, and I want to see where the main event story is going so points for getting the important stuff right.

 

 

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Smackdown – April 4, 2008: Get A Move On

Smackdown
Date: April 4, 2008
Location: American Airlines Arena, Miami, Florida
Commentators: Jonathan Coachman, Michael Cole

It’s the first show after Wrestlemania and the big story is the Undertaker defeating Edge in the show’s main event to get the World Title back. You can all but guarantee that won’t be it between the two, as a match like that is primed for rematches. Other than that, we might be seeing some new stars around here, which tends to be the case after Wrestlemania. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is La Familia to get things going and none of them look happy. Edge has never been so upset as he felt he left everyone down. Most of all, he feels like he let Vickie Guerrero down but swears on their love that he will get the World Title back. Chavo Guerrero feels like he let La Familia down and says Kane cheated to beat him at Wrestlemania. Vickie, after a rather mild “excuse me”, says Edge and Chavo will get their next title matches at Backlash. As for tonight, their opponents can face each other, as it’s Kane vs. Undertaker.

Matt Hardy vs. MVP

Non-title as the battle rages on. MVP drives him into the corner to start and fires off the shoulders to the ribs. A neckbreaker gets Matt out of trouble and they fight to the floor as Cole recaps this rather long feud. Back in and Matt drops an elbow for two and a clothesline has MVP outside again.

That doesn’t last long this time either as MVP hangs Matt over the ropes for something like a Nightmare On Helm Street to take over. MVP sends him outside in another heap and Matt goes into the announcers’ table to make it worse. We hit the reverse chinlock back inside before MVP goes simple by stomping on Matt’s face.

Back up and Matt goes after the knee (feels like some poetic justice), including wrapping it around the rope in the corner. More cranking ensues on the mat, followed by the Side Effect. The Twist of Fate is broken up but MVP’s knee is too banged up to try the running boot in the corner. Now the Twist of Fate can finish MVP off.

Rating: B-. This was a slower paced match than the two usually have but they both have the skills to have a quality match like this one. MVP almost has to lose the title to Hardy sooner than later as that is entirely the point of picking this feud up after such a long hiatus. Granted it won’t mean as much due to MVP’s consistent losing, but at least they are tying up the loose end.

Festus vs. Zack Ryder

Jesse and Curt Hawkins are here too. Before the match, Hawkins and Ryder didn’t have many nice things to say about Festus. The bell rings so Festus beats both of them up on the floor without much trouble. Back in and Festus beats on him in the corner as commentary talks about Snoop Dogg at Wrestlemania. A bunch of headbutts keep Ryder down but he manages some forearms to the face. The fall away slam sends Ryder flying though and a running knee makes it even worse. Festus grabs the fireman’s carry flapjack for the pin.

Rating: C. This was little more than a squash but Festus can do the power stuff well enough to make it entertaining. If nothing else the flapjack looks like something that could wipe someone out, which is not something every finisher manages to accomplish. I’m a bit surprised that Ryder lost to someone who is little more than half of a comedy team, but maybe the reheating is upon us.

Long video on Ric Flair losing to force his retirement, plus his farewell.

Here is Shawn Michaels to address what he did to Ric Flair. Shawn talks about being face to face with Flair on Raw and feeling his eyes well up with tears. Cue Batista to interrupt though and he isn’t looking happy. Batista says that he isn’t over what happened to Flair yet, because he won’t get to see his friend wrestle again. Shawn says it killed him too but Batista doesn’t want to hear it.

Shawn talks about how Flair wanted his best and Batista would have done it too. Batista says not so fast and says that while Shawn had a job to do, Shawn doesn’t do jobs. If Shawn had laid down JUST ONCE, Flair would still be here. Because Shawn wouldn’t do the right thing, Batista will never ride with his best friend again. Does Shawn really see Flair as Old Yeller? Like some sick old dog? Batista walks away, still making it sound like Flair died.

Undertaker and Kane meet in the back but don’t say anything.

Vladimir Kozlov vs. Matt Bentley

Bentley is an OVW mainstay while the debuting Kozlov comes to the ring to no music for a bit of an eerie vibe. Kozlov flips him over to start before firing off some kicks. The boot choke in the corner sets up a headbutt to the chest and a torture rack drop finishes Bentley fast. Total squash and impressive enough while it lasted.

Miz/John Morrison vs. Jimmy Wang Yang/Shannon Moore

Non-title. Miz drives Yang into the corner to start but misses a clothesline. Moore comes in with a dropkick for one but it’s off to Morrison as there are a disturbing amount of empty seats opposite the hard camera. Morrison finishes fast with the flipping neckbreaker.

Post match Great Khali comes out to wreck everyone. Cue Big Show to say he is getting in Khali’s face instead, with Khali leaving again.

Here are Teddy Long and the owners of Beverly Hills Choppers to announce the winner of the Divas contest. Michelle McCool wins but here is Victoria to interrupt. Victoria says the contest was fixed and the brawl is on, but a mystery woman jumps Michelle from behind. Said mystery woman also knocks Cherry (here for the finals) down as well and leaves with Victoria. No name is given but you might know her better by her name in OVW: Nattie Neidhart.

Long Wrestlemania video.

Kane vs. Undertaker

Non-title. They shove each other around to start so Undertaker goes after the arm. Some arm cranking has Kane down until he powers out, only to have Undertaker take out the leg instead. With that not working, Undertaker switches back to the arm as Coach says they aren’t going as hard as usual due to not wanting to hurt each other.

Kane backs him into the corner for some shots to the face as the pace picks up fast. The slugout actually goes to Kane, who drops him with a big boot. The right hands in the corner just wake Undertaker up and the brawl heads to the floor. Back in and they fight over a chokeslam attempt until stereo big boots put them both down. They both sit up but here is La Familia to jump both of them for the double DQ.

Rating: C. This was little more than a way to have a big main event without having either champion lose. The match was barely a thing as they spent about half of it in slow motion, which did kind of make sense for the story they were telling. Thankfully they didn’t have either of them lose, so they were thinking here, even if the stakes were nonexistent.

Post match Undertaker and Kane fight back, including double chokeslams and Tombstones, to clear the ring and end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. They kept the pace going here and had a few debuts to go with the next steps in the big stories. Other than Batista’s weird way of talking about Ric Flair being gone, there wasn’t much that didn’t work here. While nothing was through the roof, it was a show that felt like it came in with momentum and then moved towards Backlash. Good, efficient show here and a great breath of air after the last few weeks.

 

 

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Smackdown – February 8, 2008: Vickiekins

Smackdown
Date: February 8, 2008
Location: American Bank Center, Corpus Christi, Texas
Attendance: 6,500
Commentators: Jonathan Coachman, Michael Cole

We are getting close to No Way Out and the Smackdown Elimination Chamber match. That should be enough to carry the show, though there is also a Royal Rumble rematch between Edge and Rey Mysterio for the Smackdown World Title. Tonight is likely going to be about building towards those matches so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Michael Cole brings out Batista for a chat to start. Batista says his experience in the Chamber is his strength because he knows what it is like. There is going to be a ton of monsters in that Chamber but here is MVP to interrupt. MVP says Batista has never been in the Chamber with him but Batista promises violence, especially for what MVP did to Ric Flair. Now it’s Big Daddy V, with Matt Striker, to interrupt.

V feels differently about who is going to win the Chamber with Striker promising violence. Yeah yeah V is big and heavy in case you didn’t get the idea. Then Great Khali, with Runjin Singh, comes out with the latter saying Khali will win. Then Finlay, with Hornswoggle, comes in to say he’s here to fight. Then Undertaker pops up and the good guys clear the ring, likely setting up a six man tag. As soon as MVP came out, you knew what the next eight or so minutes was going to be, especially if you watched Raw where they did the same thing.

Wrestlemania is coming.

Kane vs. Shelton Benjamin

Rematch from ECW where Kane won by countout. Before the match, Shelton says there ain’t no stopping him now. Kane hammers him down in the corner and hits a basement dropkick to keep Benjamin in trouble. A missed charge sends Kane into the corner though and Benjamin hits a Blockbuster for a delayed one.

The chinlock doesn’t last long as Kane is back up with some shots to the face to start the comeback. The top rope clothesline sends Benjamin outside where Kane gets posted. They head up to the apron with Shelton going up top. Kane uppercuts him back to the mat….and doesn’t beat the count to give Shelton the win.

Rating: C. That’s definitely a creative ending but it came after a pretty standard match. Kane vs. Benjamin sounded like a match that should have been rather good but for some reason neither of their tries have gone very far. It also doesn’t help that they don’t have much going on at the moment so they’re just matches for the sake of filling in time on various shows.

Chuck Palumbo vs. Jamie Noble

Yes, again, but this time Michelle McCool is here with Jamie. Palumbo kicks him in the face to start and hammers away, only to miss a top rope elbow. Noble knocks him outside but Michelle isn’t sure about having Noble stomp away. A dropkick knocks Palumbo off the apron again but sends a diving Noble into the motorcycle (OUCH). Back in and Full Throttle finishes Noble.

Rating: C-. That crash onto the motorcycle looked good but my goodness it is hard to care about this story in any other way. Palumbo just isn’t that interested but Noble continues to do everything he can to make this work. They need to move on though, as this match has been done to death already.

Post match Palumbo destroys Noble even more, with commentary getting into their serious voices over the brutality. Palumbo even teases running a downed over with his motorcycle as this segment goes on FAR longer than a Chuck Palumbo and Jamie Noble segment needed to last.

WWE has an office in Shanghai!

Jesse and Festus vs. Deuce N Domino

Cherry is here too. This is the new improved Festus, who comes to the ring with a bag over his head. The bag comes off and Festus looks the same, only to go nuts as usual when the bell rings. Deuce N Domino are cleared out but Deuce comes back in to get armdragged by Jesse. Festus keeps rocking back and forth on the apron as Jesse misses a charge in the corner to put him in trouble for a change. A distraction brings Festus in so the chinlock can go on, only to be broken up just as quickly. The hot tag brings in Festus to clean house and a pump kick into a splash knocks Domino silly. The fireman’s carry flapjack gives Festus the pin.

Rating: C. So yeah it’s the same Jesse and Festus, meaning they’re fun for a bit before before you realize how little Jesse brings to the team. Festus did his thing well enough and is great as a wrecking ball, but the charm wears off soon. Kind of like anything involving Deuce N Domino mattering, as they have completely collapsed after a great start.

Here is Edge for the Cutting Edge. He doesn’t want to do it, but he shows us a clip from the Royal Rumble where Vickie Guerrero was taken out by an errant 619. That brings out Vickie, with Teddy Long at her side, as this week’s guest. After the EDDIE chants die down, Edge sends Teddy to the back so he can be alone with his “Vickiekins.”

Edge knows that next week is Valentine’s Day and Edge has a special question to ask her. That’s next week though, but for now, Rey Mysterio needs to come out here and apologize right now. Cue Rey, who tries to explain but gets slapped by Vickie. Berating ensues, followed by Edge beating Rey down. Rey is ready for the Conchairto though and hits a quick 619 to send Edge bailing. With Rey and Vickie alone, Rey apologizes to her. Fine enough segment with the challenger standing…well not quite tall but close enough.

No Way Out rundown.

Raw Rebound.

Edge won’t say what he is asking Vickie next week.

Edgeheads vs. Jimmy Wang Yang/Shannon Moore

Yang dropkicks Ryder down to start but it’s quickly off to Hawkins for a forearm to the chest. The villains start taking turns working on Yang’s arm but he gets a boot up in the corner to cut off a charging Hawkins. Moore comes in for a quick legdrop on Ryder, who is right back up with a reverse inverted DDT for the pin.

Rating: D+. This is a match that never had a chance to go anywhere and it seems that Yang and Moore’s completely out of nowhere run is finished. They were a fun enough team, who had no chance to actually do anything because the tag division is that weak. Hawkins and Ryder work well together though and it makes sense to give them a win like this to establish them as something more serious than just Edge’s goons.

Great Khali/MVP/Big Daddy V vs. Batista/Finlay/Undertaker

Matt Striker, Runjin Singh and Hornswoggle are here too. We’re joined in progress with Khali hammering on Finlay before MVP comes in to do the same. Finlay fights out of trouble and hands it off to Batista to start on the arm. V comes in and misses the huge charge into the corner, allowing Batista to hit the shoulders in the corner. Undertaker gets to come in and unload with right hands and headbutts before cranking the arm around the top.

Old School is broken up but the second attempt works just fine. An MVP distraction lets V drop Undertaker with a clothesline though and we take a break. Back with MVP hammering on Undertaker but Batista comes in for a suplex. Finlay gets a chance to stomp on MVP, who manages to send him over the top and outside. Everything breaks down and Undertaker grabs a chair, which can’t possibly end well.

We settle down to Khali coming in and stomping on Finlay before stopping to pose. For once that isn’t a bad idea as it’s off to V for a rather easy slam. MVP’s chinlock doesn’t last long and he misses the running boot in the corner, allowing the tag off to Undertaker. Snake Eyes into the big boot (that’s always smooth) gets two and everything breaks down. The parade of secondary finishes sets up Undertaker’s chokeslam to MVP as the match is thrown out.

Rating: C+. Well good for them for not having Undertaker pin MVP, the US Champion. The result was pretty definitive but they didn’t have someone take an unnecessary fall. It’s almost like WWE was thinking about this for a change. Anyway, you know that the Chamber has two possible winners so the match is going to be a lot of filler before the finish, but at least they did something smart here.

Post match Undertaker, Finlay and Batista stare each other down to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. We are firmly at the point where No Way Out is set and there isn’t much left to do. WWE has done a decent enough job with half of pay per view that isn’t so interesting so this was about as good as they can do. Hopefully they can come up with something good for next week, because that could be quite the lame show. For now though, this was just barely ok enough, but there is nothing you need to see.

 

 

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Smackdown – January 4, 2008: The Focused Group Show

Smackdown
Date: January 4, 2008
Location: Richmond Coliseum, Richmond, Virginia
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jonathan Coachman

It’s the start of a new year and that means we are on the way to the Royal Rumble. This week will take a big step towards that show as we get to find out the new #1 contender to Edge’s Smackdown World Title. It’s Beat The Clock time, and that can make for a fun show. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Edge being rather grateful to Vickie Guerrero for winning the World Title. Last week she even saved the title, after Batista won a handicap match but didn’t beat Edge, meaning the title didn’t change hands. I’m still not sure I get why the match was restarted instead of Batista winning the match but not the title, but the post match beatdown made more sense.

Opening sequence.

Here is Vickie Guerrero, as pushed by Teddy Long, to welcome us to the new year on Smackdown. She gets right to the point: if Undertaker or Batista touch Edge, they have no chance to retain the title. In the spirit of competition, tonight is a Beat The Clock Challenge (which was announced last week) for a shot at Edge at the Royal Rumble. Participants include Finlay, Rey Mysterio, Batista and Undertaker. With that out of the way, Vickie brings out Jonathan Coachman to replace the departed JBL on commentary.

Beat The Clock Challenge: Finlay vs. MVP

Non-title and Hornswoggle is here with Finlay. Feeling out process to start and they go to the mat for some early grappling. With that going nowhere, they get back up with MVP nailing a kick to the face. Finlay is fine enough to send him outside to start the brawling, only to be sent into the barricade as we take a break.

Back with Finlay working on the leg, which doesn’t seem to be the brightest move. MVP punches his way out and gets Finlay on his back to drop some heavy right hands. The cravate keeps Finlay in trouble until he powers up and into the corner. That doesn’t go well either as MVP knocks him down and hammers away again, only to get pulled into an armbar (as the bad thinking continues).

Back up and Finlay misses a charge into the post, setting up MVP’s running boot to the face for another near fall. With nothing else working, Hornswoggle throws in a shillelagh, which MVP picks up. The referee will have none of that, allowing Finlay to use another one to knock MVP cold for the pin at 9:46.

Rating: C-. I expected a lot more logical style out of Finlay here, as it would make sense for him to go after as many pins as he could. As a match it worked well enough, but this was about one thing and they completely missed the point the whole way. Finlay winning is interesting, though I can’t imagine this going anywhere as far as the US Title is concerned.

Post match Vince McMahon comes out to hug Hornswoggle and hand him his hat, though Finlay doesn’t seem convinced.

Kenny Dykstra/Victoria vs. Michelle McCool/Chuck Palumbo

How are these two still a thing??? The guys start things off with Palumbo taking him down but getting hammered in the corner for his efforts. The women come in quickly and it’s a basement dropkick to Victoria. Back up and Victoria sends her shoulder first into the post though and the villains take over.

A legdrop on the arm sets up an armbar but McCool is out without much trouble. It’s already back to Palumbo, who powerslams Dykstra down but misses a big boot in the corner. Palumbo is fine enough to catch him on top with a superplex for a breather, meaning Michelle can come in to clothesline Victoria. Dykstra offers a distraction though, allowing Victoria to hit the Widow’s Peak for the pin.

Rating: D+. They are taking their sweet time with wrapping up this Palumbo/McCool stuff and I’m really not sure why they’re taking so long. It wasn’t exactly an interesting story in the first place as it’s just a biker with the blonde and the fact that it is designed to go somewhere with Palumbo makes it even worse. Bad match, as Dykstra and Victoria aren’t exactly much better.

Post match Palumbo blames McCool for the lost and leaves without her.

Vickie Guerrero doesn’t like the coffee that Teddy Long brought her. Teddy leaves and an angry Chavo Guerrero comes in. Chavo isn’t happy with what Vickie is doing to the Guerrero name with her relationship with Edge. Her solution: put him in Beat The Clock, but he still wants something he can’t have.

Beat The Clock Challenge: Chavo Guerrero vs. Funaki

The time is set at 9:46 and Chavo starts fast by stomping away in the corner. A slam gives Chavo two but Funaki is back with a running headscissors for two. Funaki small packages him for two but gets belly to back suplexed for the same. They trade some rollups for two each and Funaki gets the same off an enziguri. A middle rope crossbody gets two more but Chavo is back with a Gory Bomb for the pin, setting the new time at 6:02.

Rating: C. Now that’s more like it, as it felt like they were trying to win the match instead of just having a regular match which ended whenever. Chavo isn’t going to get the title shot, but it is nice to have him show some anger towards Vickie, just for the sake of setting up something for the future. Funaki is another good hand and putting him in there meant the match was going to be ok at worst. The clock was what mattered here though and they cut it down to something more interesting by shaving off three and a half minutes.

Beat The Clock Challenge: Batista vs. Curt Hawkins

Hold on though, as Vickie Guerrero pops up to have Teddy Long change things a bit.

Beat The Clock Challenge: Batista vs. Curt Hawkins/Zack Ryder

The clock is set at 6:02 and Batista goes after both of them to start. Some double teaming in the corner doesn’t do much to Batista, who clotheslines Hawkins and catapults Ryder back into the corner. The Batista Bomb is broken up with a high/low though and the double stomping is on. Batista gets taken outside where he punches his way out of trouble but gets taken down again back inside.

A legdrop sets up a Hennig necksnap as they do have a target. Another legdrop into a splash gives Ryder two so they load up a double DDT which is countered into….something that is so unclear that they try it again. This time Batista backdrops both of them down and starts the comeback, including a powerslam to Ryder and a spinebuster to Hawkins. The Batista Bomb is loaded up but time expires at 6:02.

Rating: C. This was angle advancement rather than a match as Hawkins and Ryder were trying to stretch the match out and hurt Batista where they could, but they were never trying to get a win. It wouldn’t have made sense for them to do so either, so they had the logic right here. Edge clears a major hurdle and Vickie did the smart thing, so this went about as well as it could have.

Raw Rebound.

MVP isn’t happy with his loss and is made even madder by the Raw Rebound being about Ric Flair’s career continuing. He’ll beat Flair to end his career and make himself feel better.

Rey Mysterio talks about how difficult a Beat The Clock Challenge can be as you don’t know what you’re doing and have to go as fast as you can. Lucky for him, that’s his style. True actually.

Jimmy Wang Yang/Shannon Moore vs. Deuce N Domino

Cherry is here with Deuce N Domino and Yang/Moore have been having a snappy little feud with Miz and John Morrison on ECW. Deuce elbows Yang in the face to start but his hiptoss doesn’t work so well. Instead Yang hits a jumping kick to the back of the head but Domino gets in a cheap shot to take over. The chinlock doesn’t last long and it’s off to Moore to clean house. A springboard spinning crossbody gets two (it might have helped that Domino was falling down before the contact), followed by a rollup to give Moore the fast pin.

Rating: C. They didn’t have much time here (a theme tonight) but Moore and Yang continue their roll. I don’t think they have much of a chance at winning the titles, but imagine this: taking two people with nothing to do, putting them together and seeing what happens. I’m still not sure why that isn’t done more often, as it seemed to work just fine with these guys.

Beat The Clock Challenge: Undertaker vs. Matt Striker

The clock is set at 6:02….but hang on as Striker is in a referee shirt. It seems we have a replacement.

Beat The Clock Challenge: Undertaker vs. Mark Henry

The clock is set at 6:02 and Matt Striker is the guest referee. Undertaker’s running shoulder doesn’t work to start so he hammers away in the corner instead. With that not working either, Henry runs him over with a shoulder but gets knocked outside to get to the required brawling.

Henry gets whipped hard into the steps and there’s the apron legdrop to keep Henry in trouble. Back in and Undertaker switches gears by wrapping the arm around the top rope but Old School is broken up. The running DDT plants Henry for two but he’s right back with the bearhug. That’s broken up and Undertaker slugs away, setting up the chokeslam for….two as Striker won’t count the three and then runs off as time expires.

Rating: C. The time is hurting some of these matches, but in this case it might have been better to have them get out of there so fast. Henry can only do so much with the extra time so going home quickly isn’t a bad idea. Much like Batista, this was story advancement to clear one of Edge’s big problems, but it also leaves a big spot open to add some….oh come on like they haven’t made it obvious yet.

Post match Undertaker slams and chokeslams Henry.

In the back, Striker mocks Undertaker for failing to beat the clock and doesn’t like being threatened. Big Daddy V pops in to add some menacing glares.

Royal Rumble rundown.

Beat The Clock Challenge: Rey Mysterio vs. Edge

Non-title, the Edgeheads are here with Edge and the clock is still set at 6:02 (with Cole getting in a good line by saying 619 is no good for Rey tonight). Edge gets smart by going straight to the ropes to start and then bails to the floor for a quick neck rub. Back in and Rey snaps off a hurricanrana, followed by a dropkick into the seated senton for two. Edge powers up and sends him to the floor but here is Batista to take out the Edgeheads.

That’s enough for Rey to grab a cradle for two but Edge sends him face first into the buckle. Cue Undertaker to make the lights go out and when they come back, Edge is in 619 position. Rey hits said 619 and adds the springboard splash for the pin at 4:32 (despite Cole saying REY’S GONNA DO IT, which is usually a dead giveaway in the opposite direction).

Rating: C. You would think that Edge vs. Mysterio would be good no matter what but it turns out that a match getting less than five minutes and having four other people get involved was a bit much. This was certainly a different way to go for them but they did what they need to do. Rey has beaten Edge with help and now he gets the chance to do it again on the big stage.

Overall Rating: C+. The wrestling might not have been great but what mattered here was having the one concept going throughout the show. That made for a very fast paced show, even if there wasn’t much of value until the very end. I can go for a show like this as it makes them focus, but it’s a prime example of a show that doesn’t need to be watched in full if a recap is available.

 

 

 

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