ECW on TNN – March 31, 2000: Storytelling, STORYTELLING I TELL YOU!

ECW on TNN
Date: March 31, 2000
Location: Uptown Theater, Kansas City, Missouri
Commentators: Joel Gertner, Joey Styles

After last week it isn’t clear who the top heels in the company are anymore. Mike Awesome and Raven seemed to be the featured act but it also looks like the Network is the main story. Odds are it’s the latter given that they got half the TV time last week, but you never can tell in ECW. Let’s get to it.

Joel and Joey get us going with both guys sucking up the Kansas City crowd. Joel talks about carrying this network and that brings out a Mexican speaking (his words, not mine) Cyrus, flanked by Tajiri. The fans want Heyman as Cyrus talks about bringing the fans Rollerjam (I loved that show actually) and says the Network is taking control tonight.

Tonight he’s going to fight Super Crazy for the TV Title because idiots like Tajiri aren’t getting the job done. Tajiri isn’t pleased but Cyrus threatens to revoke his work visa and send him back to Big Japan to do jobs to Abdullah the Butcher in thumbtack matches. Cyrus repeats that he’ll be fighting for the title in case someone didn’t get it the first time.

Opening sequence.

Danny Doring and Roadkill promise to get their hands on the Dangerous Alliance tonight. One of Da Baldies comes in and steals the camera time, triggering a brawl. The other Baldies come in and the good guys are laid out.

Hardcore Heaven is May 14.

Yoshihiro Tajiri vs. Little Guido

Feeling out process lasts about 8 seconds before Tajiri starts firing off kicks, only to be caught in a reverse powerbomb out of the corner. They head to the ramp for another HARD kick to take Guido down. It’s already table time but Guido comes back with a slingshot Fameasser to take over. Guido’s buddy Big Sal sends in a chair but Tajiri throws it at Guido, only to hit the table in the corner instead. A few chops put Tajiri down but he comes back with the handspring elbow as we take a break.

Back with Tajiri kicking Sal down and suplexing Guido onto the table for two. A big kick to the head puts Guido down again and Tajiri ties him up in the Tree of Woe for a baseball slide to drive the chair into his face. Off to a dragon sleeper but Guido gets his foot onto the ropes. Another handspring elbow is counntered into a neckbreaker and Tajiri is in some trouble. Not enough trouble to matter though as he counters a tornado DDT into a super brainbuster for the pin on Guido.

Rating: C-. By ECW standards this wasn’t too bad. The hardcore stuff continues to plague the company though, as these two were more than capable of having a good match without the table and chair and interference. ECW fans always brag about having good wrestling and all that jazz, but at this point it was very rare to see wrestling without hardcore on the side.

Mike Awesome says anyone can come try to take the title away from him.

The Sinister Minister is in an elevator for a tarot card reading about ECW. There isn’t much to say here as he just summarizes the current storylines in the company and makes a few unfunny jokes about some lower level people, such as Elektra used to be a B, but with the help of modern medicine she’s a DD. The ending is a surprise though as he starts laughing and Mikey Whipwreck comes in laughing just as hard and destroying the table.

Danny Doring/Roadkill vs. Da Baldies

Doring wants to make this a street fight because that never happens in ECW. There are three Baldies though so Doring brings out Tommy Dreamer to even things up. It’s a brawl to start of course with Grimes headbutting Dreamer low in the corner. Tommy finds a pizza cutter from somewhere and carves up Grimes for fun. Angel comes in for the save and clotheslines the invading Danny down as well. Doring comes back with a Stroke (G-Spot Sweep) to take Angel down, only to be taken down by a sitout Rock Bottom from DeVito.

Roadkill comes in with a great looking springboard clothesline and a Boss Man Slam for two. A Vader Bomb elbow crushes DeVito even more and here’s another table. Dreamer suplexes Grimes on the ramp but Roadkill misses a springboard splash through the table. Doring has a piece of guardrail and Dreamer puts a ladder on the corner. Da Baldies make a comeback and whip the non-Roadkill good guys into the ladder.

Three stereo low blows take the Baldies down but Dreamer gets powerbombed out of the corner to take him out again. Doring and Dreamer come back to snap the ladder into two Baldies’ faces. The rail is sent in but Grimes misses a Swanton bomb, landing on the steel. Dreamer DDTs Grimes onto the rail and a guillotine legdrop/top rope splash from Doring/Roadkill are enough for the pin.

Rating: D+. Usual ECW garbage brawl here but at least there was a story to it with Da Baldies trying to claim the bounty on Dreamer. Not a terrible match here as at least this time they advertised it as a street fight instead of a wrestling match. Again, at least it was short which helps a lot.

House show ads.

TV Title: Cyrus vs. Super Crazy

Before the match Cyrus reveals that it’s a SWERVE and there’s a new opponent.

TV Title: Rhyno vs. Super Crazy

Rhyno runs him over to start and takes Crazy’s head off with a clothesline. There’s a table in the corner less than two minutes into the match but Crazy comes back with a springboard spinwheel kick to the face. Rhyno heads to the floor and gets taken down by a nice plancha, drawing a big ECW chant. Back in and Crazy rains down right hands in the corner but Rhyno tosses Crazy into the air for a nice crazy. The Gore is countered with a drop toehold but Rhyno comes back with a powerbomb for a close two.

Rhyno stomps away in the corner and drops him throat first on the top rope. We hit the chinlock as the match slows down a lot. Jack Victory gets in a cheap shot from the floor to Crazy but the champion comes back with a quick springboard moonsault for two. Now it’s Rhyno in a chinlock but he comes back with something like a running powerbomb through the table. Crazy somehow kicks out at two before grabbing a quick victory roll for two. A third powerbomb gets two for Rhyno and here’s another table. Rhyno loads up a superplex, only to be countered into a sunset bomb through the table to retain Crazy’s title.

Rating: C-. There was a story here which is the main thing ECW matches often lack. I can live with the tables in there if the story makes sense, and Crazy overcoming the odds to beat Rhyno as clean as you can in ECW works well enough. Crazy is another guy that can go without all the extra stuff which makes it more annoying to see it water down his matches.

Post match the Network comes in and destroys Crazy until Sandman makes the quick (by his standards) save, but Rhyno Gores Sandman down. The Network poses to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. For an ECW show, this actually worked. The Network story is a good idea and fits the anti-establishment idea of ECW. There’s a story going through the episode here other than Raven vs. Dreamer and that’s what ECW needs more than anything. This wasn’t too bad but the hardcore stuff needs to be toned down.

 

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On This Day: October 1, 2000 – Anarchy Rulz: EXTREME Technical Wrestling

Anarchy Rulz 2000
Date: October 1, 2000
Location: Roy Wilkins Auditorium, Saint Paul, Minnesota
Attendance: 4,600
Commentators: Joey Styles, Joel Gertner

We it’s the final countdown here as we only have four shows left. The main event here is Lynn vs. Credible which is a big match for some reason I guess. It’s not like it matters much as their TV show’s last episode was five days after this. RVD gets his TV Title shot against Rhyno here in what should have been the big feud for the last 8 months or so but whatever. Let’s get to it.

Joel does his usual sex promo which is always funny and this is no exception. You could always tell he was having a blast doing those and he clearly is here too. We get the theme song with no real issue beforehand.

Christian York/Joey Matthews vs. Danny Doring/Roadkill

Matthews is more famous as Joey Mercury. Doring and Roadkill continue to be the insanely popular team that finally got the tag belts once the company was dying. Doring and Matthews start us off. Roadkill is ridiculously popular and gets a ton of cheers as he destroys York. He’s Amish in case I didn’t mention that. York counters a slingshot into a leg drop from the middle rope which was pretty sweet.

The better faces clear the ring but Doring goes for a tope but just misses completely and crashes into the concrete in a HORRIBLE looking bump. York and Matthews hit stereo suicide dives which is one of my favorite spots. Roadkill hits a SWEET double clothesline off the top. By that I mean he was standing on the rope, not the corner. That was awesome. This is an awesome high flying match.

Roadkill hits a huge powerbomb on York and the squash is on. A double team slam/top rope leg drop ends this. They hug it out afterwards and Simon Diamond and Swinger show up with chairs to take out the winners.

Rating: B-. Solid opener here that got the crowd into the show quite well. The tag titles meant nothing at all though as they were gone for so long and Nova/Chetti was the best team in the company for like the last year or so. This means nothing though as the belts aren’t even on the line on this show. Decent match but it’s not like it means anything.

Gertner eats Lucky Charms as his diet regimen. Someone has been training him apparently.

Cyrus comes out and bashes Gertner while using the I’VE GOT POP line that TNN had back then. They have a match tonight which should be one sided as Cyrus used to be a wrestler. Cyrus says to get him, Gertner has to beat a guy named EZ Money. Money was a no name guy that wound up in the very last month of WCW as Jason Jett. Gertner gets scared. Cue Spike for no apparent reason. Apparently he’s the commissioner now which has to be a parody of WWF or WCW. He says Money has to beat Kid Kash for no apparent reason, setting up this.

Kid Kash vs. EZ Money

Somehow the segment I just went through took about 8 minutes. To the shock of NO ONE, Kid Rock music gets no reaction in Minnesota. This should actually be fairly awesome. Kash could go, there’s no question about that. He had been pushed as a big time guy, actually beating Rhyno for the TV Title for two weeks. Money hits what would become his finisher in WCW (vertical suplex but he just lets him go so that Kash goes flying) for two.

The fans want tables and Money crashes onto all of his buddies. Kash hits an INSANE double jump front flip to the floor. If Kash could do nothing else, he could REALLY do big flips well. Gertner tries to get the crowd into things as Money hooks a reverse Boston Crabd and hooks Kash’s arms up with it in a PAINFUL looking move. Kash is just insane with these jumps and flips.

He hits a 360 tornado DDT for a long two as the fans are way into this. Kash hits what would be more commonly known as Whisper in the Wind and a bunch of other big flips and springboard moves for two. He was definitely exciting. Money Maker (double underhook piledriver) gets nothing due to interference.

The referee doesn’t notice three guys in the ring other than Kash apparently. None of this works though as Kash is too big of a star to lose to EZ Money. Money goes for a top rope powerbomb but reverses into a rana for the pin in a sloppy but difficult  move. Gertner vs. Cyrus now.

Rating: B-. This was supposed to be entertaining and it certainly was. Kash was fun to watch at times and this would certainly be in that list. Money was never anything all that special but he was ok here. This was just filler but for about 8 minutes it was a very solid cruiserweight style match.

The heels beat the tar out of Kash, Spike makes the save, Spike gets beaten up and Sandman comes in without music or anything to blow the roof off the place. Elektra tries to seduce him but gets beer poured on her chest and Gertner’s face shoved into them. Match finally.

Cyrus vs. Joel Gertner

Joel takes his shirt off and has Kamala paint on his chest. He goes for a People’s Elbow, even taking the neckbrace off. This is weird as Joel has no idea what he’s doing and Cyrus is a trained wrestler in a suit. It’s ALL Cyrus here of course as Gertner is pretty much dead. Pay no attention to Sandman out there. I’m sure he won’t do anything. Beer to Cyrus’ eyes and a rollup ends it for Gertner.

Rating: N/A. This was just for the ECW fans and it worked fine. It only took six months to get to this. They talk about how this is a victory over the Network, even though they would be canceled in 5 days anyway.

Beer bash follows.

Website plug and house show ads to fill time.

Da Baldies vs. Chilly Willy/Balls Mahoney

Angel and DeVito for the combination here. Willy was this guy that never meant anything but got a push near the end of the company due to no one else being around to get it. Joel comes back to commentary here and talks like a New Yorker in a funny bit. Mahoney has a fork and starts stabbing people with it. There’s a fork shot from the apron to the floor. Yeah this is going to end well.

This is the big blood/violence match of the night as Balls bites the cut and might have licked it a bit. There isn’t much here at all other than a DeVito moonsault in the crowd which mostly misses. Willy and Angel are more or less not involved here, leaving us with a one on one in the ring which isn’t that good. Angle runs back in and we get the staplegun to the eye. Three stereo chair shots to the faces end this.

Rating: D-. It’s your standard big brawl that means nothing at all but it got the fans into it so I guess we can pass it. A match with a staplegun to the eye though is just hard to get anything close to caring about or taking like pro wrestling as you probably guessed. I never got the appeal of these.

Lou E. Dangerously jumps Gertner. Joey goes after him and security drags him off. We go to the control room for no apparent reason where a guy is freaking now.

We go to Justin and Francine who we can’t hear at first. Oh he’s bashing Jerry Lynn. Credible is in a Favre jersey, which will NEVER mean anything in Minnesota. Nope not a thing.

Lynn says he’s tired of just being the best. He wants to be champion. If that was the case about two years ago, things would have gone differently for ECW.

Joey and Cyrus on commentary now. Is there a point to this after Cyrus got beat earlier?

Steve Corino vs. CW Anderson

The winner gets the title shot at the next PPV. I don’t remember either guy winning a PPV match recently but whatever. I think Corino is a face here but I’m not sure. Anderson is older than Corino? I wouldn’t have guessed that one. A long counter sequence starts us off and the fans are for Corino. They chop it out and amazingly Steve isn’t bleeding yet.

For a guy based around the idea of old school, Corino wasn’t very old school. As I type that Cyrus calls him out on it. Anderson is bleeding. Also isn’t Anderson supposed to be based on Arn Anderson? Therefore both of these guys are old school, and isn’t that completely against the idea of ECW in the first place? Corino takes a great chair shot and hey Steve is busted open. Even Joey points out how easily he bleeds.

Anderson goes for a Stunner on Corino’s arm as this really is old school based. They slug it out and Corino takes over for a bit. This has been pretty decent. Anderson gets crotches on a chair and they’re both down now. Corino goes Dusty Rhodes and I shake my head at him. Dusty, the guy that was supposed to be everything ECW was against, is getting tributes here. Simon and Swinger come out but Victory holds them off.

Anderson keeps trying to hit the spinebuster and never can get it. He sets up another chair in the middle of the ring but gets superkicked into it. He goes for the spinebuster AGAIN but gets caught in an Old School Expulsion (Reverse Twist of Fate and a great name for a move) on the chair for the pin and the title shot at November to Remember.

Rating: B-. This wasn’t bad but it was lacking that pop to get it to be something good. The chairs were used far too much in this for a match that is supposed to be about who is the best wrestler. Again I ask, who else have these two beaten? I certainly can’t remember them getting a major PPV win but I guess they’ve been hot on TV or house shows. Not bad but certainly lacking something.

Mikey, Tajiri and Sinister Minister (James Mitchell) read a book about witchcraft and demonology and it lights on fire. Riveting.

Rhyno wants RVD tonight. Good thing he has him. He says he’ll shove Fonzie’s whistle up his…yeah. Up Fonzie’s that is.

Tag Titles: FBI vs. Mikey Whipwreck/Tajiri

Once the titles hadn’t been in place for four months, Mikey and Tajiri won the belts in a tournament and held them for one day. The FBI, a former comedy team, held them for a few months before the final change at the next to last PPV. Nova and Chetti never got them of course. The challengers are in masks which is a weird look.

To my complete and utter shock, we start with a glorified comedy match. The Unholy Alliance (challengers) dominate and we get a Tarantula on Guido. Tony is tied up in the corner and gets a pair of baseball slides and a fireball. I continue to wonder why they called this wrestling after a certain point.

Can someone get these people a pizza before they all die? Tajiri slaps the turnbuckle to go with the clapping, but if he doesn’t speak English, how does he know it’s something he should clap to? Guido is busted open. They’re actually tagging in and out here which is rather odd. Unprettier is blocked by Mist but Sal pulls the referee out.

The Alliance is dominating here, meaning of course they’re going to lose. Yep there’s the belt into the ring from Sal. In a kind of creative ending, Tajiri takes Sal out with a moonsault but he lands on him and Tajiri can’t get out. A belt shot and an Unprettier keeps the titles on a completely uninteresting team for no apparent reason.

Rating: C+. This was ok and formula based but they could certainly have a better one. On TV where the titles changed hands, they apparently had a classic which I’ve heard a lot about but haven’t seen. This wasn’t bad at all but it was just kind of there. I still don’t get the appeal of the Italians as the champions though but they company was out of business in like four months anyway so it didn’t really matter.

More house show/website stuff.

TV Title: Rhyno vs. Rob Van Dam

The whole RVD never got beat and Rhyno is the bigger and better champion is decided here apparently while Justin Credible is main eventing another PPV. Rhyno charges while RVD is doing his spin kick to his name. We immediately go to the floor and I’m not sure if there was a bell yet. This is another of those big brawls that doesn’t really prove anything at all but the fans love them so they kept happening.

The lights are weird here as things are really dark. It’s likely the company just couldn’t afford it I guess. Van Dam hits an over the ropes dive to take out Rhyno. The idea here is RVD’s usual stuff isn’t working so he’s having to hit and run. The skateboard dropkick hits in the corner and the challenger is dominating. Cyrus calls the fans troglodytes. It must be a Canadian thing.

Rhyno hits a middle rope clothesline to kill RVD and take over. And it’s table time. You knew it was coming. Rhyno hits a chinlock as Alfonzo blows his whistle in time with the RVD chants. Five Star gets two and he’s stunned. The Gore hits and there’s the piledriver through the table. Fonzie hits Rhyno with a chair to set up the Van Daminator.

Van Terminator misses thanks to Justin interfering for no apparent reason and it hits Fonzie. Rhyno hits a running spinebuster through the table and then a piledriver on a chair ends it. I always hated that move for him as he’s a power guy using a move that Jerry Lawler used a lot. Never got that.

Rating: D+. You know for a big clash, this was pretty weak. RVD loses….why? Heyman wouldn’t put the spotlight on him because of guys like Justin? This wouldn’t have saved the company but it would have given them a better chance. This was a pretty weak match that didn’t feel special. It’s not really that good and while it’s entertaining, this should have been a main event somewhere instead of a throwaway match. But that would be logical booking which didn’t exist around this time so there we are.

Fonzie is more or less dead and takes forever to get taken out. There might have been a heel referee making a fast count too.

Did you know about the website and the house shows?

We’re at about 8 minutes of nothing at all happening at this point.

ECW World Title: Justin Credible vs. Jerry Lynn

Lynn is the home town guy here so the ending should be clear but it’s ECW so of course it’s not. Justin is still wearing the Favre jersey in Minnesota which is supposed to get heel heat. That doesn’t date the shot at all. Francine has a broken rib or something. Again, these two are in the main event and RVD isn’t. Lynn gets the hometown boy pop and it’s not bad.

We stall FOREVER as it’s been fifteen minutes plus since the last match ended and this one hasn’t even started yet. We start with some technical stuff and the fans think Francine is a crack w****. Joey isn’t sure if Justin can outwrestle Jerry. Great to see that kind of thought going into things here. Lynn hits a middle rope bulldog and we hit the mat again.

Justin goes into the corner and goes to the floor. It wouldn’t have been as bad if he hadn’t jumped over the ropes like that. The plancha mostly misses though and everyone is down. This is moving pretty slowly but there’s a TON of time left so they have time to set something up. I knew the in ring stuff was going on too long. We head to the floor to get away from this wrestling nonsense. Can’t have that now.

Lynn hits a DDT on the chair to get us back to even. This match feels like something that should be in the midcard rather than the main event. Justin gets on a mic and yells at Lynn which is cheap heat 101 and there’s nothing wrong with that. We get our like third DDT of the match on the chair. Mix it up a bit guys. And there are a pair of legdrops to fix that.

Francine makes a save so there’s no table for Credible. He can’t beat Jerry though and Lynn hits the Cradle Piledriver for two, killing the crowd. Credible gets his own piledriver for two and they’re back. The referee gets kicked in the face and another is here. He gets to two and then just stops. It’s the same referee from the RVD match so yeah he was cheating earlier. Belt shot gets two.

He’s counting so fast that Jerry is having to in essence kick at what would be a two in a normal match but is almost three here. Tombstone again gets two and it’s New Jack. Dang it. He was supposed to be the referee for no apparent reason and here he is. Cookie sheet (New Jack needs his own cooking show) for the referee but Credible knocks out Jack. He walks into a Cradle Tombstone to give Lynn the title though.

Rating: C+. Not bad here, but like I said this feels like a big midcard match and not a main event on a PPV. That’s not a good sign at all but at least Credible isn’t champion anymore. Again, RVD is never champion but Credible was for over five months. Yeah that’s intelligent. The match was good, but it was Jerry Lynn vs. Justin Credible for the world title. See a problem here?

The locker room empties and Lynn makes a big speech. Or at least he would if the mic works. Seriously?

A Limp Bizkit video to Rollin with highlights of the show ends it.

Overall Rating: C-. This didn’t suck. It’s certainly not a great show or anything like that, but this was certainly one of the better ECW shows. The problem is of course though that the company is dead at this point and this show really didn’t mean much of anything. The booking here is a bit odd but at the same time it came off as a fun show and there was some good stuff on here. If you’re incredibly bored and can actually find it, take a look.

 

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ECW on TNN – March 10, 2000: In Search Of A New Wrestling Mastermind

ECW on TNN
Date: March 10, 2000
Location: ECW Arena, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 1,500
Commentators: Joel Gertner, Joey Styles

It’s the go home show for Living Dangerously and the main story….is up for debate actually. It could be Dreamer and Tanaka winning the tag titles on a fluke last week. It could be (and likely is) Heyman and company going to war with the Network. It could be Dusty vs. Corino. Either way, none of these feuds have had matches announced for the PPV, but maybe we’ll get something tonight. Let’s get to it.

Joey and Joel are in the ring for the intro for the first time in a few weeks. Joel actually gets to finish him limerick this week by saying that after tonight’s show in Philly, he’ll be riding Cyrus’ mom silly. This of course draws out Cyrus but even Joey goes off on him this time, saying he won’t interview a jerk like Cyrus.

Opening sequence.

Cyrus is still in the ring as the fans chant for RVD. We FINALLY get some matches announced for the PPV as tonight we’ll start a TV Title tournament which will end at the PPV. Bill Alfonzo comes out but Cyrus keeps ranting, saying he’s canceling ECW on TNN to be replaced by Extreme Championship Shuffleboard. This brings out RVD with the title and his ankle wrapped up. Before we get to that though, here’s a PPV ad so we can pay the talent.

Also a hotline ad.

Back in the arena with Scotty Anton (Riggs) standing by RVD’s side. Cyrus makes fun of Riggs but Rob shoves him away and praises Riggs for his loyalty. Yeah the screwjob is coming a mile away. Anyway Rob says his leg is getting better and he’s still in the gym to stay in shape. Rob talks about watching ECW grow for years now and about how he’s never left for greener pastures. He isn’t going to let Cyrus screw up everything ECW has done no matter how badly he’s hurt.

Rob throws down the belt and vows to take the title back from whomever Cyrus gets it on and he’ll do it here on TNN. Cyrus and Fonzie are about to get into it but Rhyno gores Fonzie down. Rob and Rhyno get into it but Anton pulls RVD away before he’s injured even worse. Cyrus wants to start this tournament right now.

TV Title Tournament Quarter-Finals: Rhyno vs. Spike Dudley

Spike scores with a quick neckbreaker and gets two off a small package. A sunset flip gets the same and Spike low bridges a charging Rhyno out to the floor. Back from a break with Spike being thrown off a balcony onto but not through some tables. Back to ringside with Rhyno being sent into the barricade and a bulldog gets two for Spike.

Spike takes a chair to the top but dives into a left hand to the ribs to put him down. A TKO gets two for Rhyno and he sets up a table in the corner. Spike comes back with the Acid Drop but here come all the heels to break it up. The distraction lets Rhyno Gore him through the table, injuring Spike’s knee in the process. A piledriver sends Rhyno to the semi-finals at the PPV, apparently against Sandman who beat Tajiri in a non-televised match.

Rating: D. I’m over this Spike the Giant Killer schtick. We get it: you have ONE MOVE that can stop big guys but people are going to interfere in case it’s a top level monster. It’s the same idea of X-Pac being able to hit the X-Factor and win matches against guys he has no business being in the ring against. In other words, COME UP WITH SOMETHING ELSE.

Spike is being taken to the hospital.

Jado/Gedo vs. Impact Players

This is also from the same show but it’s being shown out of order for some reason. I think Gedo is starting against Credible with the Players in early control. Off to Storm for a dropkick and a bunch of trash talking (yes from Lance Storm) before it’s back to Credible for a chinlock. Gedo tries to fight up but gets taken down by a clothesline and it’s back to Storm for right hands. Gedo flips out of a German suplex and clotheslines Storm down, allowing for the tag off to Jado.

Storm gets crotched on the top and belly to back superplexed down. Everything breaks down and both teams score some hot near falls. Back to Justin as the chair is thrown out of the ring, only to be replaced by a table. Jado reverses a hiptoss to send Credible through the table before catching Storm in a tiger driver. A top rope splash from Gedo gets two and Justin is dropkicked to the floor. Jado gets two off a middle rope powerbomb but Gedo walks into a superkick and gets caught in a spike piledriver for the pin.

Rating: C+. This was a fun match for the most part when they ignored the violent nonsense. I can usually overlook insanity and rules breaking down in tag matches because it makes for the most interesting stuff. Also, how nice was it to see actual TAGS in a tag team match? Fun stuff here.

We’re FINALLY given more PPV matches with Dreamer/Tanaka defending against the Impact Players and Mike Awesome/Raven (never been on screen together that I remember) and Corino vs. Dusty Rhoes in a bullrope match.

Tag Titles: Raven/Mike Awesome vs. Masato Tanaka/Tommy Dreamer

Sure why not. Awesome throws Dreamer around to start before it’s off to Raven for some cheap shots. Dreamer gets up and Raven runs off to bring Mike back in. Tanaka gets the tag as well to give us the same match we’ve been watching for three months. Awesome wins a slugout and gets two off a quick splash. Tanaka sends him face first into the middle buckle and scores with a missile dropkick for no cover. Awesome counters the tornado DDT into a sitout spinebuster but he tags Raven instead of covering.

We get our first chair but Tanaka channels his inner Samoan and no sells the shot to the head. Tanaka elbows him in the head for two and Raven is sent into the chair in the corner. Dreamer pounds away and puts Raven in the Tree of Woe for the standing on the crotch spot. Awesome uses the distraction to powerbomb Dreamer out of the corner to give Raven two. Back to Mike for a middle rope back elbow, getting another near fall.

A choke bomb gets two more on Dreamer so it’s back to Raven. Bird Boy grabs a mic and pounds it into Dreamer’s head as Raven talks trash to Tommy. Dreamer does the smart thing by kicking Raven low but the back is too hurt to tag. A bulldog gets two on Dreamer and it’s table time. Awesome misses the splash through the table and Dreamer makes the tag off to Tanaka. He cleans house on both challenges but Awesome takes him down with a release German suplex.

Everything breaks down and Judge Jeff Jones sends in two more tables. Masato loads up a superplex through the table but gets crotched on the top instead. Dreamer loads up a Death Valley Driver off the top, only to be pulled down by Raven and sent face first into the edge of the table with the drop toehold. That looked SICK.

The Awesome Splash is only good for two and the Awesome Bomb through the table gets the same thanks to a save by Tanaka. The Roaring (discus) elbow gets two on Raven and the Dreamer DDT gets the same. Awesome hits the running Awesome Bomb through the table on Dreamer, allowing Raven to get the pin and the titles.

Rating: D+. This was actually something almost kind of resembling the tag team formula. It’s certainly not a good match but at least there was some kind of a flow to it. The booking on the other hand continues to be stupid as there’s no real reason to change the titles around like this other than to set up the three way dance. Raven vs. Dreamer and Tanaka vs. Awesome are played out, but Heyman, the GENIUS, can’t come up with anything new so this is what we’re stuck with.

Sinister Minister does his recap of the show and laughs a lot. Is there a point to this guy?

Overall Rating: D+. Well it wasn’t as bad as last week’s show but that isn’t saying much. We do at least have something set up for Sunday which is more than I was expecting to have by the end of the show. Some of the wrestling here wasn’t terrible and the less Sandman nonsense I have to sit through the better.

Here’s Living Dangerously if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/03/12/on-this-day-march-12-2000-living-dangerously-2000-two-ecw-shows-in-a-month-is-dangerous-enough/

 

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ECW on TNN – February 25, 2000: ECW Fans Don’t Like Wrestling

ECW on TNN
Date: February 25, 2000
Location: The Rave, Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Attendance: 2,250
Commentators: Joey Styles, Joel Gertner

We’re getting closer to the Living Dangerously PPV and I don’t think anything has been announced for the show. There’s also no announcement made yet on the future of the TV Title other than there will be a new champion. We’ve got three episodes left before the show so maybe we’ll hear some matches announced tonight. Let’s get to it.

We open with Cyrus in the ring and the fans chanting RVD. He talks about how the network can’t have the TV Title on the shelf for twelve weeks, and here are Corino, Rhyno and Jack Victory. Tonight Cyrus gets to appoint a new TV Champion which will be…..Rhyno, the last man to be in the ring with Van Dam. Cyrus tells Paul Heyman to bring out the title and a cup of coffee but we need to get the way too long intro out of the way as Heyman comes to the ring.

Heyman is in the ring but Cyrus wants his coffee. Paul is clutching the TV Title belt to his chest as Cyrus berates him for not wanting to sell RVD out. He says Heyman is going to bend over for the network here on TNN but Heyman doesn’t seem interested. Heyman yells at Cyrus and finally hits him in the head with the belt. Rhyno Gores Heyman down and the beating is on until Sandman’s music hits. Naturally it takes forever for him to get to the ring and just as naturally the heels don’t do anything else to Heyman in the meantime.

PPV ad.

Post break and Sandman is STILL in the crowd. After about three minutes (literally) he’s in the ring and we’re ready for our first match.

Sandman vs. Rhyno

Oh wait we have to have Corino and Victory get in cheap shots so Sandman can swing his cane. Sandman and Rhyno head to the aisle and up by the stage with Sandy in control. Here’s a ladder into the ring but Sandman stops to get a table, allowing Rhyno to get in a cheap shot. Sandman sends him into the ladder, allowing him to bring in the table. A slingshot hilo onto the ladder crushes Rhyno and a top rope rana (the Heinekenrana) puts Rhyno down again. Cue Tajiri to spray green mist, allowing Rhyno to hit the Gore through the table for a pin.

Rating: N/A. This wasn’t wrestling and that’s all I’ll say about this nonsense.

Post whatever that was, Super Crazy comes out for the save.

We get a highlight package of that whole thing which has taken up nearly half the show.

Gertner starts his limerick but Joey cuts him off to talk about Rhyno claiming to break Rob’s leg. He doesn’t have much to say about it but at least he cut off the funny stuff.

Doring and Roadkill run into the Dupps in the back. Somehow we get a loser leaves town match booked in about 20 seconds.

Dupps vs. Roadkill/Danny Doring

The Dupps (Bo and Jack) are as low brow “comedy” as you can get with the duo playing REALLY stupid country stereotypes. The Dupps run Doring over to start but Roadkill comes in with a springboard double clothesline followed by a double splash in the corner. A wheelbarrow slam/top rope legdrop combination end Jack Dupp to get rid of this stupid team in about a minute and a half.

Website and house show ads. Apparently Tommy Dreamer and Francine will be at some mall. No city or anything is given, but they will be there.

Here’s Tommy Dreamer with something to say. He does a Scott Hall survey with ECW winning the poll. Dreamer cuts out the nonsense and asks Raven to come out here to finish things. Instead he gets Francine who understands that Dreamer is trying to protect her. She’s seen the tape though and Raven DDT’ed her by mistake. Naturally the fans want puppies. Francine rants about what she’s done in ECW, including guiding Dreamer to a tag title. This is supposed to be a burning line for some reason.

We get a clip of Raven accidentally knocking Francine out cold and here are the Impact Players. Dreamer insults Dawn Marie and suggests she just take her top off before challenging the Players to a handicap match. Storm says they’ll put up the titles if Dreamer can find a partner. Why he’d do that is anyone’s guess but somehow it turns into Francine naming Raven as Dreamer’s partner.

Tag Titles: Impact Players vs. Tommy Dreamer/Raven

Tommy gets beaten down for a bit until Raven comes out in dress pants and a turtleneck of all things. Storm accidentally superkicks Credible but Justin makes the save off the Even Flow. Dreamer breaks up a pin off That’s Incredible to Raven as it’s already broken down. It’s one of those brawls in the crowd where you can’t see any of the brawling between Dreamer and Credible as we have Storm and Raven slugging it out in the ring.

A low blow stops Raven as the other two are way at the other end of the building. Raven does the drop toehold onto the chair and here’s Dreamer at ringside to break the barricade apart. Actually it’s a row of seats in the ring and a double drop toehold sends the champions into the chairs. The Players are sent to the floor but Storm gets back in to set up a table. Justin and Raven head to the floor and Dreamer hits a Death Valley Driver on Storm through the table for two with Dawn Marie making the save.

Cue the girl fight as the freaking Sinister Minister comes out because we aren’t overbooking this nonsense enough. Raven accidentally throws powder in Dreamer’s eyes, causing Tommy to DDT Francine (the chick with long hair, as opposed to the champions who have one head of short hair between them). Dreamer loads up a DDT on Storm but gets blasted by a title belt for two. A top rope spinwheel kick from Storm and a spike tombstone on a chair is enough to finish Tommy.

Rating: D. And most of that is because of Dawn’s outfit. I’m tempted to start calling these the two man titles because there’s no tagging at all in these matches. Also, can we PLEASE find a story other than Dreamer hates Raven? It’s literally been the SAME IDEA since this show debuted.

The Sinister Minister sits in a bunch of trash and talks about fire before laughing a lot to end the show.

Overall Rating: Trombone. You think I’m wasting a regular rating on something like this? This show had nothing to do with wrestling and I don’t think they have any idea what it’s supposed to be. The Heyman/Network stuff makes sense, but what is it supposed to lead to? The Sandman standing up for ECW? More non-wrestling, as Sandman is embarrassing in the ring. It says a lot when this is making Nitro in 2000 look great by comparison. Again, not a wrestling show at all.

 

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ECW on TNN – February 18, 2000: With The Only Meaningless Conchairto In History

ECW on TNN
Date: February 18, 2000
Location: Tallahassee Civic Center, Tallahassee, Florida
Attendance: 2,000
Commentators: Joel Gertner, Joey Styles

The main story coming out of last week’s show was Rhyno and Corino going after Dusty Rhodes with Sandman making the save. Odds are we won’t hear about that tonight due to it being the second half of a double taping, but the story wasn’t very good other than Dusty’s parts anyway. We also might get an update on the TV Title situation. Let’s get to it.

We open with Cyrus in the back, talking about how we only have 59:45 to go until ROLLERJAM! ECW is in trouble after Dusty Rhodes attacked him last week and they have heat with the network now. RVD is officially stripped of the TV Title and ECW will do what Cyrus says to do. NOW ONLY 57:19 UNTIL ROLLERJAM! I remember watching this when it first aired and it was awesome due to Cyrus being so over the top. Also Rollerjam was awesome.

Opening video.

Joey and Joel do their intro from the booth instead of the ring with Styles talking about the new video game, which was a clone of WWF Attitude.

Tanaka says he’s winning the title back tonight.

Nova/Chris Chetti vs. Roadkill/Danny Doring

Chetti takes Doring into the corner to start and we actually get a clean break. A quick kick puts Danny down and it’s off to Nova for a double elbow and hip toss. Roadkill comes in sans tag to clean house but takes out Doring by mistake. Nova comes back with a kick to Roadie and a spinebuster to Doring before diving to the floor to take out Roadkill. Nice sequence there.

Back in and Roadie blocks a tornado DDT and Doring takes Nova down with a clothesline. This is pretty fast paced stuff but it’s not falling apart at all. A pair of slams (sidewalk and power style) put Nova down and a top rope elbow from Doring gets two. Nova comes back with a reverse DDT and it’s off to Roadie vs. Chetti.

Chris cleans house on both guys and hits a tornado DDT on the big fat guy (Roadkill). Nova and Chetti load up the Tidal Wave (top rope splash and legdrop from the same corner) but only Nova launches with Chetti getting crotched. Doring makes the save and Roadkill pops up to set up a table on the floor. The big fat splash misses Nova entirely, but Doring hits a jumping double arm DDT on Nova for the pin.

Rating: C. Not bad here but it falls into the same ECW trap that most matches do: there’s not enough time spent building to the frantic (yet good) finish. Both of these teams were good in the roles they played, but Nova and Chetti never won the titles and Roadkill and Doring only won the belts after the TV show was off the air.

Post match the Impact Players, the reigning tag champions, come out to destroy all four guys.

Mike Awesome says he’ll keep the title.

Super Crazy vs. C.W. Anderson

I never cared for C.W. Anderson. He’s supposed to be a throwback to Arn Anderson but it never quite worked. Crazy hooks a quick headscissors to put Anderson on the floor before hitting a BIG springboard moonsault to take out Anderson and Bilvis Wesley. Crazy picks up a chair for no apparent reason, allowing C.W. to superkick it into his face. It’s already table time but Anderson goes to the top rope after setting it up. Crazy is all like ESTOY EL LUCHADOR and hurricanranas Anderson down for two.

Not that it matters though as Anderson comes back with a spinebuster through the table. Arn Anderson should smack him around for that kind of no selling. A half nelson suplex gets another two count for C.W. but a springboard tornado DDT gets the same for Crazy. Super throws in two more tables and chairs for something resembling a Conchairto because why not use one of those in a meaningless TV match? A springboard legdrop through the table gets two for Crazy as Lou E. Dangerously makes the save. Bilvis accidentally hits Lou with a chair, allowing Crazy to hit two moonsaults through the table for the pin.

Rating: D. Again, this was a six and a half minute TV match with no story to it, so we had three tables, a Conchairto, two people interfering and chair shots. The reason stuff like this worked in the Austin vs. Foley main events was there was a solid foundation under the matches to get us to that point. Just having it all happen in a few minutes between guys with no story doesn’t work at all unless you’re some kind of bloody thirsty sociopath.

Chetti and Nova want a piece of the Impact Players. They didn’t need to wear a jock strap on the face or to carry Shawn Michaels’ bags (Justin) to get over.

ECW World Title: Masato Tanaka vs. Mike Awesome

Awesome is defending. The fans chant RVD at Awesome during the weapons check. You know, because we wouldn’t want weapons getting involved in an ECW match or anything. Awesome runs the challenger over to start and catches a Thesz Press attempt in a belly to belly suplex. Tanaka comes right back with a powerslam of his own, only to have Awesome run the corner and hit a back elbow to the jaw. Nice move.

Tanaka quickly knocks him to the floor and hits a plancha off the top rope to the floor. Mike goes into the barricade but gets a boot up to stop a charging challenger. A big dive over the barricade into the crowd takes Tanaka down as we hit the brawling stage. Mike hits a HARD chair shot to the head (what was that about weapons?) but Tanaka no sells it. A German suplex is no sold and a chokebomb gets two for Awesome.

It’s table time but Tanaka escapes an Awesome Bomb and sends Mike to the apron for a DDT, sending Awesome through the table. A running chair shot to the head has Awesome in trouble and a missile dropkick to the back of the head gets two. Tanaka hits the top rope chair shot to a grounded Awesome but Mike counters the tornado DDT into a kind of spinebuster on the chair.

The second attempt at the DDT connects but Awesome gets up at two. Diamond Dust (flipping Stunner off the middle rope) is countered into an Alabama Slam for two and Mike gets two off a sitout Awesome Bomb. The Awesome Splash gets the same and here’s another table. Tanaka escapes another Awesome Bomb and hits the Roaring Elbow, only to have Mike deck him on the top and hit a top rope Awesome Bomb through the table to retain.

Rating: C+. Yeah these matches are hard hitting and fun, but when you’ve seen one you’ve seen them all. There is NOTHING between the big moves and it takes away from any value the match has. It’s a car crash match with nothing but spots and that makes for a match that is fun for a bit but has zero staying power at all. There’s no story or anything here and that holds matches WAY back.

Overall Rating: C-. The main event was fun in a car crash sense, but other than that there’s nothing on here worth seeing. One of ECW’s biggest problems is the complete lack of an upper midcard. There’s a tag team division, a middle of the card and a main event scene, but nothing between them. This becomes a problem because there’s nothing for the guys in between so you get a bunch of random matches from week to week. This was decent enough but it didn’t do much for me.

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ECW on TNN – February 11, 2000: Dusty Rhodes At His Finest

ECW on TNN
Date: February 11, 2000
Location: Tallahassee Civic Center, Tallahassee, Florida
Attendance: 2,000
Commentators: Joey Styles, Joel Gertner

It occurs to me that there are only 34 episodes of this show to go and it’s taking me forever to complete, so I’m going to start churning these out at a higher rate. It’s one of those shows that I want to get finished so I don’t have to think about it anymore as it’s flat out not that good most of the time. Tonight is all about the fallout from RVD’s injury. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence opens things up.

Joel and Joey get things going by sucking up to the national champion Florida State Seminoles. The rhyme this week is about women being from Venus and riding something of Joel’s. This was on the Rise and Fall of ECW DVD. Cyrus talks about RVD being injured but the Network has bigger concerns, such as the gate and the ratings. He hypes such TNN shows as Rockin Bowl and Rollerjam (I LOVED that show!) before saying the TV Title is going to be defended tonight.

Little Spike Dudley is going to defend in Van Dam’s place against the Du….the Dup……DANG IT ALL TO GOODNESS IT’S THE FREAKING DUPPS! I thought I was done with this stupid act. For those of you lucky enough to have never seen them in the original TNA, they’re two country bumpkins named Stan and Bo (say the full names and you’ll get the HILARIOUS joke) who I guess are Network stooges now.

TV Title: Little Spike Dudley vs. Dupps

Double Acid Drop and we’re done in 14 seconds.

Living Dangerously ad.

Video game ad. It was WWF Attitude with blood.

Raven wants Mikey Whipwreck to talk to Tommy Dreamer about Francine. She’s nothing to break up their friendship over and Dreamer needs to see that. Mikey faces Tommy tonight but he’ll talk to him anyway. Raven leaves and the yet to be named Sinister Minister comes in to laugh about Raven being the perfect disciple.

New Jack and Balls Mahoney rant about Da Baldies.

Tommy Dreamer vs. Mikey Whipwreck

They do a wrestling sequence to start with Tommy spinning out of the Boston Crab leading to a show of respect. The Minister comes out and distracts Dreamer, allowing Mikey to take over. Minister shouts that Mikey is a man, prompting Mikey to grab a mic and say that just because he’s 39 and lives with he’s mother it doesn’t mean he’s a baby. Dreamer says Mikey is something censored and blasts him in the head with a mic.

Dreamer walks him into the crowd which is called brawling here. Mikey reverses a whip into some bleachers before standing on Tommy’s throat. They slug it out on top of the bleachers with Dreamer tossing Mikey to the concrete. We go back inside with Mikey hitting a Russian legsweep onto a chair to take over. Dreamer gets a boot up in the corner and hooks a quick swinging neckbreaker, only to miss a middle rope elbow. Whipwreck misses a moonsault and gets caught in the Dreamer Driver (Misawa’s Emerald Flosion but for American fans it’s White Noise but with the Mikey in front instead of around back).

The Minister breaks up the pin but gets a low blow and Bronco Buster from Francine. Raven comes out and is blinded by powder in his eyes. He DDTs Francine by mistake and Tommy snaps, pounding on Raven in the corner. Dreamer lays out Mikey with a Spicolli Driver (Death Valley Driver) and a DDT for the pin.

Rating: D+. It’s an angle disguised as a match which is one of ECW’s main ideas. Dreamer vs. Raven has been done for so long now that it’s almost impossible to get up for it anymore. The Minister and Mikey would make a good team once they added Tajiri and we’ll get to that Unholy Alliance soon enough.

Post break Dreamer beats up Blue Meanie for making a joke about Francine. Another guy tells him Raven had powder in his eyes and gets beaten up as well for speaking when not spoken to.

Justin Credible vs. Raven

Raven knocks him to the floor as the bell rings and we’re off fast. Justin is put through a table through a dive off the top before being whipped into the barricade. Raven sets up another table in the corner but Justin reverses a whip to send Raven through it instead. We head outside again with Raven being sent into the barricade and superkicked down. Back in for a chinlock on the bleeding Bird Boy. Justin is in his usual offensive pattern: hit one move and pose, hit one move and pose and so on.

A third table is brought in but Justin misses a charge and sends himself through it by mistake. Justin suplexes his way out of a sleeper but Raven kicks him low to take over. A knee lift puts Justin down but here’s Lance Storm to lay out Raven with something made of metal. Lance, Justin and their lackey Jason triple team Raven because Dreamer is at the hospital with Francine. Raven is driven head and face first into the chair with a drop toehold, a DDT and That’s Incredible (tombstone).

Rating: D+. This was your usual brawl with a few wrestling moves thrown in to appease a few fans. It wasn’t interesting though as this feud is long since over but ECW has nothing better to do than reuse the same ideas over and over again. Raven was just kind of there at this point and why they didn’t put the TV Title on him until they had someone better is beyond me.

Danny Doring and Roadkill make the save.

Post break Dusty Rhodes and Heyman come out to check on Raven. Cyrus comes out to say we’ve got a Network situation here and we need to get the wrestler out of the ring. Dusty gets in his face and says this is about one of the boys, not the Network. They finally get Raven out of the ring as Cyrus keeps running his mouth.

Dusty goes on an amazing rant about how this is about the wrestlers who work hard to pay Cyrus’ bills. He’s here because the fans have cared about him for over twenty years and he showed them respect too. Steve Corino comes out and slaps Dusty’s hat so Dusty lays everyone out until Rhyno sneaks in. They beat Dusty down and put him in the Figure Four but Sandman’s music hits to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. The wrestling was bad but the stories were more interesting. The Dusty promo is really good and makes you smile as a wrestling fan. Other than that though there isn’t much to see here. These matches are hard to sit through though as they’re just mindless brawling until we get to the end of the show, which doesn’t make for good television.

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