Smackdown – February 5, 2021: We’re In A New Reality

Smackdown
Date: February 5, 2021
Location: Tropicana Field, St. Petersburg, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves

The Royal Rumble has come and gone and, should the men’s winner Edge take the blue route, he will be challenging Roman Reigns, who retained the Universal Title. He has about nine weeks to decide where to go, as does Bianca Belair, who won the women’s Royal Rumble. Let’s get to it.

Here’s the Royal Rumble if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of the Royal Rumbles.

Here are Roman Reigns (Cole: “The ever aloof.”), Jey Uso and Paul Heyman to get things going. Reigns says he doesn’t says he doesn’t like talking about the past and would rather look to the future, because the future seems to be Edge. Reigns goes on a rant about how he’s the best (including calling himself WWE Champion) and asking why Edge is wasting time on Raw and NXT. Why not come here and bring yourself to the island of relevancy?

Now why is he out here first anyway? Edge is making the head of the table wait? Heyman says Edge is here so he needs to get out here right now. Heyman: “Music and entrance for Edge please. PYRO FOR EDGE PLEASE!” No one shows up and Heyman whispers something to Reigns, who does not seem pleased. Reigns isn’t happy with Edge disrespecting him and gets serious, saying Edge is going to give him his decision by the end of the night.

King Corbin vs. Dominick Mysterio

Rey Mysterio is here with Dominick but Corbin jumps both of them on the way to the ring, including launching Rey off the stage. We start after a break with Dominick firing off a dropkick but getting knocked down in a hurry. Rey is having his knee examined as Corbin continues to hammer away and grabs a chinlock. Corbin elbows him down again and asks if Rey has been training Dominick.

Back up and Dominick manages to send him outside for the dive as Rey drags himself to ringside. We take a break and come back with Dominick hitting a neckbreaker for two. Deep Six plants Dominick for two but he sends Corbin outside again. Rey has gone underneath the ring and grabs Corbin’s leg, setting up the 619. The frog splash gives Dominick the pin at 9:23.

Rating: C-. Well that was pretty nefarious. I’m not exactly feeling what is coming off as a bit of a Dominick heel leaning but Dominick vs. Rey could be somewhat interesting if that is where we wind up going. That being said, having Corbin involved is not exactly the best way to go with anything, but that hasn’t stopped WWE before.

We look at Sami Zayn interfering in the Intercontinental Title match two weeks ago.

Big E. talks about being ready to fight tonight to defend his Intercontinental Title. Much like Lady Liberty, bring him your tired, hungry, bearded and bald because we are going to fight for this prize.

Daniel Bryan vs. Cesaro

They start fast with Bryan going after the arm and then backdropping Cesaro out to the floor. The dive takes Cesaro down again but he blasts Bryan with an uppercut back inside. We see Shinsuke Nakamura watching from the back before Bryan kicks the springboard corkscrew uppercut out of the air. A YES Kick gets two but Cesaro (who has been cut open on the side of his head) is back up with a torture rack into a backbreaker. The Swing sets up the Sharpshooter….and Bryan taps at 4:14.

Rating: C. I wouldn’t have bet on that one but dang if they aren’t giving Cesaro a nice something as of late. I’m still far from believing that any of this is going to matter in the long run after being burned far too many times, but it’s nice to see for a change. If nothing else, who would have expected such a clean and easy win?

Respect is shown post match.

We look at Bianca Belair winning the Royal Rumble.

We see Bianca Belair’s parents watching her win live, including her dad climbing onto the coffee table and then falling over the back of the couch.

Belair is asked who she is going to face but she is so excited and can’t listen to everyone telling her what to do. She is going to do it her way and announce her decision soon.

Seth Rollins is back next week. Again.

Bayley vs. Ruby Riott

Liv Morgan is at ringside and Billie Kay is on commentary, where she insists that she was only allegedly thrown out of both the Riott Squad and Royal Rumble. Riott nails an early Riott Kick for two but Bayley throws her face first into the top turnbuckle. It’s time to work on the armbar but Riott fights up and sends her face first into the buckle to even things up.

Riott’s rollup gets two so Bayley sends her throat first (a lot of firsts in this one) into the bottom rope. A Stunner over the middle rope sets up another armbar so Billie gets up to shove the ropes closer to Riott. Morgan doesn’t like that and gets in an argument with Billie, leaving Riott to get caught with the bulldog driver for the pin at 3:59.

Rating: C-. This was more about the Riott Squad than anything else and that’s not the worst thing. Billie continues to be an absolute gem and has come miles after going I guess what you call solo. The resume thing is hilarious and now I’m not sure she even needs to rejoin Peyton Royce. At this point, she’s far more entertaining on her own and that’s great to see.

Post match Billie offers Bayley a resume.

Edge is here.

Here’s Bianca Belair for her big interview after winning the Royal Rumble. Everything has blown up since she won the Royal Rumble and she has had to ask who a lot of people are with all of these texts. Now she has a decision to make because Asuka and Sasha Banks are both interesting opponents. Cue Reginald to say Belair can’t beat Sasha or Carmella, which draws out Carmella to say the same thing.

Now it’s Sasha coming out to say she isn’t looking at Carmella anymore because that’s in the rear view mirror. Belair has her attention now because she has seen what Belair can do in the Royal Rumble. Yeah Belair can be the strongest and the fastest but the best? Belair may have it all, but she doesn’t have the title. Reginald says Belair will lose if she picks Sasha so Belair whips him out with the hair to wrap things up with no decision.

Roman Reigns is told Edge is here.

Sami Zayn can’t believe how unfair everything has been to him but tonight it’s time for some happy footage when he gets the Intercontinental Title back.

Otis/Chad Gable vs. Robert Roode/Dolph Ziggler

Non-title and the Street Profits are doing commentary in a window in the corner of the screen. Gable easily outwrestles Ziggler and takes him into the corner, where a dropkick puts Gable down. The Profits try to figure out why they can’t get a rematch as Roode suplexes Gable for two. Gable kicks him away though and the hot tag brings in Otis to start throwing people around. The Caterpillar (with the Profits bouncing along with Otis) hits Roode and it’s Gable hitting the Rolling Chaos Theory on Ziggler. Roode is back up though and the Glorious DDT finishes Gable at 3:31.

Rating: C. I know the Profits probably got on people’s nerves here and that’s understandable. However, the thing that made this work was it was different. If there is one thing that WWE really needs to fix, it is how stale their presentation feels. Just throwing something in there like this made the match at least feel different and that’s a good thing. WWE needs some fresh ideas and if they are actually trying something, good for them.

We look at the first ever Main Event, thirty three years ago today.

Hulk Hogan (with Jimmy Hart in the background) talks about the match and hypes up Edge’s decision. Hogan had absolutely nothing to say here and it was obvious.

Edge meets Shinsuke Nakamura.

Intercontinental Title: Apollo Crews vs. Sami Zayn vs. Big E.

Big E. is defending and Sami is chased outside early. Crews rolls some German suplexes for two on Big E. with Sami coming in for the save. Sami is sent outside though with Big E. following him, allowing Crews to hit the big flip dive onto the champ. Crews nails a great looking apron moonsault to crush Big E. again but Sami dives off the steps to take him down.

We come back from a break with Sami choking on the ropes but Big E. fights up and snaps off the suplexes to Crews. Sami gets put down as well and there’s the double Warrior Splash. With Sami on the floor, Crews hits an enziguri on Big E. but gets dumped to the floor. The release Rock Bottom out of the corner plants Sami for two more but Crews knocks Big E. down again.

Crews’ frog splash gets two on Sami, only to have Big E. suplex both of them at the same time. With that crazy power display taken care of, Big E.’s spear through the ropes is cut off by a knee to the face. The Helluva Kick hits Big E. for two with Crews making the save this time. Now Sami is frustrated again so Crews hits him in the head over and over. Crews throws Sami over the timekeeper’s table but walks into the Big Ending for the pin at 11:54.

Rating: B. This felt like a really nice B level house show main event. There wasn’t a ton of drama about Big E. winning but they had him break enough of a sweat that it felt like a title change could have been a remote possibility. I wouldn’t have bet on that in this one, which felt like it went a lot further than it should have. Nice job.

Post match Big E. is all fired up but Crews glares at him from behind.

Seth Rollins is still back next week.

Here’s Edge for the big closing segment. Edge talks about how he spent the last seven months dreaming. He was dreaming every mile he logged because he wanted to get back something that was his. Then he outlasted twenty nine of the best in the world today to win the Royal Rumble. Now he isn’t sure who he should face at the Royal Rumble. He asks his family and gets one answer, then he asks his friend and gets another answer. Then he was on his way here tonight and asked someone on the corner and got another answer. Edge: “His name was John. He was a nice guy.”

Cue Roman Reigns and company to cut things off though as we get a bit more serious. Edge thinks it’s funny that Reigns already needs backup, but Reigns promises that Paul won’t make a move. Reigns sends Jey to the bus because he has this himself. Edge has one chance to acknowledge him as the main event of Wrestlemania….but here’s Kevin Owens with a Stunner to Reigns before Edge can say a word to end the show. I don’t think anyone was really expecting a decision from Edge here and they still have time to set things up in the future, but we’re really not done with Owens vs. Reigns?

Overall Rating: C+. Unlike Raw, this show actually had some energy and that’s one of the best things that can be said about a big follow up show. They have time to announce the Rumble decisions later, so this was more along the lines of setting up the new reality. We now have Wrestlemania coming up a heck of a lot sooner than later and that is going to dominate everything. It certainly dominated Elimination Chamber, which wasn’t even mentioned despite being in just over two weeks. Overall, good show here, with some solid action and a nice feeling that the stakes are being raised.

Results

Dominick Mysterio b. King Corbin – Frog splash

Cesaro b. Daniel Bryan – Sharpshooter

Bayley b. Ruby Riott – Bulldog driver

Robert Roode/Dolph Ziggler b. Otis/Chad Gable – Glorious DDT to Gable

Big E. b. Apollo Crews and Sami Zayn – Big Ending to Crews

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Royal Rumble Count-Up – 2020 (Original): Now In Two Parts

Royal Rumble 2020
Date: January 26, 2020
Location: Minute Maid Park, Houston, Texas
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Vic Joseph, Jerry Lawler, Tom Phillips

It’s time to get started on the Road to Wrestlemania and while you could say the Rumbles are predictable, you could also say that they’re wide open. This is a very strange situation and I’m rather pleased with that. I’m not sure who is going to win either but they’re going to mean a lot. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Shorty G. vs. Sheamus

Tale as old as time: monster vs. guy with a stupid name. Sheamus shrugs off a wristlock to start and hits a crossface shot to the face. Gable is back up with a running crossbody over the top so Sheamus hits him a few more time. Gable’s ear is bleeding and Sheamus grabs an armbar as we take a break.

Back with Sheamus working on the arm and then hitting the ten forearms to the chest. More forearms to the chest on the floor make it worse but Gable is back with a dropkick to the knee to stagger him. Some Liger kicks in the corner put Sheamus down and Gable stomps away at the leg. The moonsault connects for two and it’s Rolling Chaos Theory for the same. Gable grabs the ankle lock but Sheamus rolls out, only to have it go on again. That’s broken up again and Gables gets two off a crucifix. Back up the Brogue Kick gives Sheamus the pin at 12:31.

Rating: C. Just a match here and they were smart to put this on the Kickoff Show instead of doing it on the regular card. This is the kind of match that wasn’t exactly hard to predict as it was all about Sheamus being the monster and running over Gable, which isn’t quite a story that gets people excited but at least WWE can make more short jokes.

Kickoff Show: United States Title: Andrade vs. Humberto Carrillo

Andrade is defending and they go with the dodging to start. Carrillo sends him outside for the slingshot dropkick through the ropes but the dive off the top only hits barricade. Back from a break with Andrade hitting a running kick to the side of the head and countering the high angle armdrag. Carrillo elbows him in the head though and now the springboard crossbody can drop the champ.

The rolling moonsault hits raised knees though and Andrade tries a baseball slide, only to wind up on the floor for an Asai moonsault. Back in and Andrade tries Three Amigos but Carrillo reverses the third into one of his own. The top rope moonsault misses as well though and Andrade rolls him up into the corner. Andrade’s running knees in the corner get two and they stagger to their feet to slug it out. They go to the corner with Andrade getting in a shot to the face, only to have Carrillo snap off a super hurricanrana for two. Carrillo tries another hurricanrana but Andrade reverses into a sunset flip to retain at 14:31.

Rating: C. This never got into that next gear, though they got the winner right. Carrillo is someone who the fans haven’t taken to yet and really, I’m not sure what it’s going to take to make them care. There isn’t much to him as far as charisma goes and that’s not enough when you have people who can fly just as well if not better. Fine for a Kickoff Show match, but that’s all it needed to be.

The opening video is narrated by Steve Austin, who talks about how important the Royal Rumble is because it can send you to Wrestlemania. Always cool to see Austin used for something important.

Roman Reigns vs. King Corbin

Falls Count Anywhere. Reigns goes after Corbin’s throne carriers and the fight is on before they get in the ring. Corbin is sent into the post and Reigns hammers away inside. The Samoan drop is blocked though and Corbin gets in a right hand for a breather. Corbin heads outside but gets pulled back over the barricade so the fight can continue. Back in and Corbin hits Deep Six for two but Reigns is right back up.

They fight outside again and over the barricade, this time into the crowd for the walking around the stadium sequence. It’s back to ringside with Reigns being dropped onto the announcers’ table for two, followed by a chokeslam through another announcers’ table for the same. With Corbin being rather frustrated, it’s time to go back through the crowd for more punching.

Reigns hits a Samoan drop through an international announcers’ table and then does the same thing again for two. They go over to the tech area and here are Dolph Ziggler and Robert Roode to jump Reigns (you knew that was coming). Ziggler busts out a chain but here are the Usos to even things up. We stay on this brawl for a good while with Roode and Ziggler getting the better of things….until Jimmy dives off a balcony to take them down. Corbin remembers he’s in the match and drops Jimmy onto a barricade.

Reigns is back with a Superman Punch to Corbin and then hits another one…before throwing Corbin in a portable toilet. Of course it’s turned over, because doing this gag with Braun Strowman and Kevin Owens in 2018 is completely forgotten. Corbin rolls out (thankfully without the sight gag) and they fight towards ringside with Corbin hitting him onto the dugout. They fight on top of the dugout with Reigns hitting a Superman punch and spear for the pin at 21:17.

Rating: D+. Completely bleh match with little drama and the pure fact that it was Reigns vs. Corbin for 20+ minutes. WWE seems to think that this is some epic feud and it’s just not, mainly because Reigns is a top star and Corbin isn’t a main event level heel. Hopefully this is it because there’s no need to continue it, which is why you can probably pencil them in for two more matches at least.

Kevin Owens talks to Samoa Joe about his success in Houston and thinks he can win tonight. Samoa Joe likes the idea of getting rid of Seth Rollins but he’ll go through Owens if he has to.

Fire & Desire are ready for the Rumble but Sonya is willing to eliminate herself so Mandy can win. Mandy looks rather confused.

Cole offers condolences to the families of Kobe Bryan and everyone else involved in the helicopter crash.

Women’s Royal Rumble

90 second intervals with Alexa Bliss in at #1 and Bianca Belair is in at #2. Belair wastes no time in hitting a running shoulder in the corner and takes Bliss to the middle rope for some forearms. A running headscissors is countered into a backbreaker to put Bliss down again and Mighty Molly of all people is in at #3 (and to the Hurricane’s music of course). She clotheslines Bliss and Belair down and a high crossbody does the same. Molly can’t get Belair out and it’s Nikki Cross in at #4.

Bliss and Cross get to clean some house but stop to hug, only to have Molly and Belair run them over. Belair gives Cross the KOD onto Bliss, who is right back up with a sunset bomb. A neckbreaker drops Molly and everyone is down until Lana is in at #5. Hold on though as she takes her sweet time getting the ring because she needs to talk about how great she is and how this is for her hot husband.

Lana finally gets to the ring and can’t eliminate Molly as Mercedes Martinez is in at #6. Martinez gets to clean house, including a butterfly suplex to Lana (in the Captain Marvel gear). It’s not enough to get rid of her though and it’s Liv Morgan in at #7 to eliminate Lana. For some reason Liv goes up so Lana shoves her off for an elimination, meaning the fight is on.

Mandy Rose is in at #8 and puts Nikki on the apron to no avail. Candice LeRae is in at #9 and hits a running dropkick on Cross, followed by the Lionsault. Belair gets rid of Molly and Bliss tosses Mandy…who lands on a conveniently placed Otis in a surprise save. Sonya Deville is in at #10, giving us Bliss, Belair, Cross, Martinez, Rose, LeRae and Deville.

Fire & Desire get together to toss Martinez as Kairi Sane is in at #11. Sane spears down Bliss and Cross, followed by a running Blockbuster to Rose. The Insane Elbow hits Rose and Mia Yim is in at #12. Cross saves Bliss from Belair’s gorilla press but gets sent to the apron so Belair can swing Bliss into her for the elimination. Bliss grabs Belair’s hair to save herself as Mandy is sent over the top, and right into Otis’ arms. Belair sends Deville over the top onto both of them so Deville and Rose are both out.

Dana Brooke is in at #13 and hits the Swanton on Mia. Belair tosses Candice and Bliss slaps Sane off the top for an elimination in a bit of an upset. Tamina is in at #14 to superkick Brooke and get in the brawl with Belair. A charge lets Belair backdrop Tamina out for Belair’s sixth elimination so far. Dakota Kai is in at #15 to get us to the halfway point and there’s the running kick to Brooke in the corner.

Bliss gets rid of Yim and it’s Chelsea Green in at #16 (to Summer Rae’s old NXT theme). Green dumps Kai but gets tossed by Bliss, followed by by Belair knocking out Brooke. Bliss knocks Belair down but Twisted Bliss hits knees. They both go over the top to the apron and Belair knocks her out to stand alone until….Charlotte is in at #17. Charlotte starts with the chops but Belair knocks her into the corner.

Naomi is in at #18 for a return and a big reaction. Charlotte and Naomi trade missed dropkicks and nip up for a staredown. They both go after Belair and it’s Beth Phoenix in at #19, sending Charlotte into a panic. Naomi gets sent to the apron but manages to springboard back in to take down Charlotte and Beth. Charlotte pairs off with Naomi as Beth tries to get rid of Belair and Toni Storm is in at #20, giving us Charlotte, Naomi, Phoenix, Belair and Storm.

Belair goes up top and Charlotte tosses her out, with the fans not being pleased. Kelly Kelly is in at #21 and hits her screaming headscissors on Storm. The Stinkface to Storm is Kelly having more fun as Beth goes nuts trying to get rid of Charlotte. Sarah Logan is in at #22 and Charlotte gets rid of her in a hurry. Kelly tries to dump Charlotte and gets knocked out a second later for her efforts.

Natalya is in at #23 for a bunch of discus lariats, followed by teaming up with Beth for a powerbomb to bring Charlotte out of the corner. Xia Li is in at #24 and starts with the rapid fire kicks as the back of Beth’s head is busted open. Zelina Vega is in at #25 and hurricanranas Beth, who probably shouldn’t be messed with given her head. Charlotte survives a three on one elimination attempt and Shotzi Blackheart is in at #26.

Naomi gets sent to the apron but runs down the steps and dives onto the barricade with her feet inches above the floor. She gets onto an announcers’ table and tries to figure it out as Carmella is in at #27. Carmella gets a very long headscissors on Natalya as Naomi goes to another table. The Glam Slam hits Charlotte as Naomi goes to the third table. Charlotte goes through the ropes to the floor to a big reaction as fans have some false hope. Tegan Nox is in at #28 and walks into a Glam Slam as Beth’s hair is almost half red from all of the blood.

Beth is the only one left standing…..and Santina Marella is in at #29. Santina dances a bit but gets caught between Beth and Natalya. I’m no Marella fan but that was very funny. That means it’s Cobra time…which she uses on herself for the self-elimination. Shayna Baszler is in at #30, giving us a final group of Charlotte, Naomi, Phoenix, Storm, Natalya, Li, Vega, Blackheart, Carmella, Nox and Baszler. Li and Nox are out in a hurry and Vega follows. Blackheart tries to get rid of Baszler in a callback to NXT but gets tossed this time.

Naomi FINALLY uses an announcers’ table cover to make it back to the ring as Baszler gets rid of Carmella, plus Storm who was put out somewhere in there. Naomi is back in and the missed Rear View lets Baszler get rid of her as well. Natalya and Beth get together for a Hart Attack on Baszler but Beth dumps Natalya in a surprise. Charlotte tries to dump Baszler and Beth but they both save themselves, meaning it’s a Charlotte vs. Baszler showdown. That’s broken up and Baszler gets rid of Phoenix but can’t toss Charlotte, who skins the cat and eliminates Baszler to win at 54:31.

Rating: B. A few weeks back, I picked Charlotte to win, no matter how illogical or annoying it might be because that’s what Charlotte does. I changed my mind to Baszler because that made more sense and now here we are, because WWE can’t help themselves with Charlotte. It’s such an anti-climactic ending because Charlotte has been in a major spot so many times that it doesn’t mean anything anymore. And now, more weeks of hearing how great Charlotte is, because we haven’t heard that recently enough.

Other than that, this was a very good Rumble with far better pacing than last year and the NXT women carrying the slack. Belair and Baszler looked like killers and I’m hoping Shayna is main roster bound. There’s nothing left for her to do in NXT and she looked awesome here. Even the Santina bit was funny for some comedy. This was a solid Rumble, despite the disappointing ending.

Post match, Charlotte says she knows some people aren’t happy with her winning but she’s the diamond and will win the title again.

Corbin says Reigns made a mockery of their match so tonight, he’s tossing Roman.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Bayley vs. Lacey Evans

Lacey is challenging and her daughter is here. Bayley gets taken down early to start so she goes to the corner to try for a turnbuckle. That just earns her a sweep of the leg and a slingshot elbow, meaning it’s time to claim a knee injury. The obvious goldbricking is obvious and Bayley hits her with a forearm, setting up a top rope elbow for two on Evans. Bayley grabs a chinlock as we hear Lacey’s military resume. The hold stays on for a good while and Bayley mocks Evans for being a mother. That’s quite the odd insult.

Evans fights up and gets in a knee from the apron. A slingshot rollup gets two but Bayley mocks the salute, allowing Evans to dodge a middle rope crossbody. The slingshot dropkick hits Bayley (and Evans has to catch her foot on the rope to keep from falling). Bayley rolls to the floor and avoids a slingshot dive, drawing hisses from Lacey’s daughter. Back in and the Bayley to Belly is blocked but so is the double jump moonsault, with Bayley grabbing a rollup with trunks to retain at 9:23.

Rating: C-. I got a nice chuckle out of Lacey losing in front of her daughter because having a child is quite the stretch for a reason to cheer for her. Bayley retaining the title is a bit of a shaky decision, but I’d assume that we’re getting Charlotte vs. Bayley at Wrestlemania in one of those fresh matches that WWE loves. Kind of boring, but it was coming after a huge match and there wasn’t much they could do.

We recap the Fiend vs. Daniel Bryan for the Smackdown World Title. Fiend beat him at Survivor Series so Bryan brought back the YES Movement (and cut his hair) for one more shot. This time it’s a strap match so Fiend can’t run away.

Smackdown World Title: Fiend vs. Daniel Bryan

Fiend is defending and they’re strapped together at the wrist with pin or submission to win. More importantly though: NO RED LIGHTS! After the Big Match Intros, Bryan goes right at him in the corner with the kicks and right hands. Those just earn him a powerbomb though as Fiend doesn’t seem to mind the pain. It’s time to start the whipping and a headbutt rocks Bryan. A missed charge puts Fiend on the floor so Bryan tries a dive, only to get sent into the barricade.

Back in and Fiend ties him in the Tree of Woe to continue the whipping. Bryan finally gets in some kicks to the head and the running knee gets two. Fiend is sent outside again and this time Bryan’s top rope dive connects. Another running knee off the apron…has no effect as Fiend blasts him with a clothesline. They go to the announcers’ table with Bryan hitting four straight low blows and a DDT not through the table. Bryan starts the whipping and unloads on Fiend, followed by a missile dropkick back inside.

Alternating YES Kicks and whips keep Fiend down and the big one connects. Fiend pops back up and asks for more so Bryan kicks him in the head again. The running knee is countered into Sister Abigail for two and Fiend looks confused. Bryan is back with a kick to the face but Fiend slaps on the Mandible Claw with Bryan on the top.

Bryan pulls him into a triangle but Fiend keeps the Claw on, only to get reversed into the LeBell Lock with the strap over the mouth. That’s broken up as well though and Fiend whips him some more. Sister Abigail is countered into a rollup for two and another running knee gets another two. Fiend pops up again and stares down at Bryan, who whips him with the strap. That just earns him the Claw, including a Claw slam, for the pin to retain at 17:28.

Rating: B. They beat each other up rather well, though the lack of drama on the near falls hurt a lot. What didn’t hurt a lot was the lack of the red light, which didn’t take away a lot of the monster effect but did take away a lot of the stupid. Fiend came off as in control here though, as he looked like he shrugged off everything Bryan threw at him and then won the match because he was done with the torture. Bryan can move on to something else now and Fiend can get ready for something at Wrestlemania. Good match, but not much drama.

Post match Fiend disappears and Bryan has to be helped out. He probably does need a break after this one.

Super Showdown is confirmed for Saudi Arabia on February 27.

We recap Asuka vs. Becky Lynch for the Raw Women’s Title. Asuka beat Lynch last year at the Royal Rumble, which was Becky’s last loss before she went on towards the main event of Wrestlemania. Lynch has been champion since and wants to avenge her loss.

Raw Women’s Title: Becky Lynch vs. Asuka

Asuka is challenging and has Kairi Sane with her. Becky avoids a dropkick to start and Asuka seems to be favoring her arm early on. Her feet are fine though as she kicks Lynch down to take over. Asuka throws her into the corner but charges into some elbows. A bulldog into a low dropkick gives the champ two and she hits a release front suplex off the apron.

Back in and the guillotine legdrop gives Becky two but Asuka slugs away. Something like a suplex into a sitdown drop gives Asuka two and they fight to the apron. That means a hip attack can send Becky into the post, but she’s right back with a middle rope Rock Bottom for two. Becky goes up again and mistimes a dive into a Codebreaker, only to go for the arm immediately after the kickout.

That’s broken up with a foot on the rope so Asuka unloads with kicks to the head. Becky has to grab the referee to prevent the referee stoppage so Asuka kicks her in the head for a very close near fall. A quick Disarm-Her attempt doesn’t work so Becky plants her for two instead. Becky goes for the arm again but the referee almost gets bumped. Asuka loads up the mist but Becky kicks her in the ribs, sending the mist into the arm. Now the Disarm-Her can go on to make Asuka tap at 16:32.

Rating: B. Another good match here as Becky gets the win over the one person she couldn’t beat. They beat each other up with Becky seeming desperate to finally beat Asuka, who was ruthless with her aggression. Asuka’s cheating coming back to cost her the match played into their story well too. This doesn’t leave her with many options, but she could wind up against Baszler or Ronda Rousey at Wrestlemania, either of which could be awesome. With the match out of the way, maybe WWE can remember that Asuka is already a champion.

The Street Profits aren’t sure who will win the Royal Rumble, with Dawkins humming various theme musics.

Bobby Lashley and Rusev are out of the Rumble after getting in a fight in the parking lot earlier today.

Booker T. joins commentary.

Men’s Royal Rumble

90 second intervals, Brock Lesnar is in at #1 and Elias is in at #2 (more bad luck as he was #1 last year). Elias talks about the gorilla in the ring and asks the fans to clap along for his new song, Sacrificial Lamb. Lesnar gets annoyed at the song and chases Elias (tripping a bit on the way out of the ring), meaning the match can start with Brock taking him down.

The first German suplex connects and Lesnar breaks the guitar over Elias’ back. That’s the first elimination so Brock gets a breather until Erick Rowan, with crate, is in at #3. Rowan blocks the German suplex and gets clotheslined out in about eight seconds. Robert Roode is in at #4, slugs away, gets clotheslined, F5, Brock stands alone. Brock poses with the title until John Morrison is in at #5 and it’s a belly to belly over the top in nine seconds.

Kofi Kingston is in at #6 and starts slugging away until Lesnar drives him into the corner. The first German suplex drops Kofi on his head and Brock starts smiling. The clock speeds WAY up so Rey Mysterio can come in at #7. Rey tries to run the ropes but gets sent into Kofi in the corner.

A German suplex each has Kofi and Rey in more trouble and it’s Big E. in at #8. The distraction lets Kofi hit Trouble in Paradise and Big E. adds the Big Ending, setting up the 619. Rey charges at Brock and gets tossed, followed by Big E. going out as well. An F5 gets rid of Kofi as well and it’s Brock alone to face Cesaro, who is in at #9. Suplex, clothesline, Cesaro is out. Shelton Benjamin is in at #10 to give us…well Lesnar and Benjamin.

Heyman tries to get Shelton to reunite with Lesnar and Shelton seems to…until Lesnar suplexes and clotheslines him out. Shinsuke Nakamura is in at #11 in a match that would be more interesting in Japan. Some strikes connect and Lesnar gets rid of him in about fifteen seconds. MVP of all people is in at #12 and gets the same treatment, though I did miss his music. Keith Lee is in at #13 and Brock looks interested.

They stare each other down and Lee shrugs off some knees, setting up a clothesline to put Brock down. Lee gets in a few shots in the corner and a collision puts them both down. Braun Strowman is in at #14 and knocks Lee out through the ropes. Brock is back up with a pair of German suplexes each and they’re all down. It’s Lee vs. Strowman for the monster slugout…and Brock throws them both out.

Ricochet is in at #15 and gets caught with a quick backbreaker. There’s a German suplex as Cole says he doesn’t want to hear about Lesnar not defending his title. In a non-title match. Drew McIntyre is in at #16 and gets in a staredown with Lesnar. Ricochet gets in a low blow from behind and McIntyre eliminates Lesnar to a nice reaction. McIntyre gets rid of Ricochet as well and Miz is in at #17.

Drew knocks Miz down and glares down at Lesnar, setting up the Claymore to get rid of Miz and stand alone. Lesnar and Heyman are still standing behind the barricade as AJ Styles is in at #18. Some early shots take AJ down but he pulls McIntyre down into the Calf Crusher. That’s broken up as well and Dolph Ziggler is in at #19.

Ziggler and AJ double team McIntyre until Ziggler punches AJ in the face. That means a suplex from McIntyre as Karl Anderson is in at #20, giving us McIntyre, Styles, Ziggler and Anderson. Everything settles down and it’s EDGE (THAT FREAKING LIAR!) at #21. Spears abound and we get an Edge vs. Styles showdown, capped off by another spear. King Corbin is in at #22 (YOU SHALL NOT BE ENTERTAINED!!!) and cleans house with Ziggler until Edge dumps AJ (who may have been favoring his wrist).

Matt Riddle is in at #23 and yes he gets in the shoe flip. Riddle knees Edge down…and is eliminated by Corbin. Luke Gallows is in at #24 and McIntyre throws Corbin out (I knew I liked him for a reason). Randy Orton is in at #25 for a few RKOs before the staredown with Edge. Stereo Rated RKO clotheslines get rid of the OC and it’s Roman Reigns in at #26. A spear hits Ziggler and Reigns dumps him, making me like him a little bit more.

Reigns no sells McIntyre’s chops and it’s Kevin Owens at lucky #27. Cannonballs abound and there’s a Stunner to Reigns. Another one hits Orton and it’s Aleister Black in at #28. A jumping knee hits Owens and a running one drops Edge, followed by Black Mass to McIntyre. Samoa Joe is in at #29 and Black is waiting on him with the strikes.

Joe kicks him down, smiles at Owens, and starts the slugout again. Seth Rollins is in st #30 (sweet, no Velasquez), giving us Orton, Reigns, Owens, Black, McIntyre, Edge, Rollins and Joe. Rollins comes out with Buddy Murphy (who was scheduled to be in this) and the AOP so Joe and Owens roll outside to start the fight. Rollins and Murphy pull Edge outside before throwing Orton over the announcers’ table (not eliminated).

The Stomp hits Reigns and Rollins eliminates Black and Owens. The Koquina Clutch has Rollins in trouble but Murphy makes the save so Rollins can eliminate Joe as well. Owens, Black and Joe brawl to the back with Murphy/AOP, leaving us with Reigns, Rollins, Edge, Orton and McIntyre. Everyone surrounds Rollins so he tries to reunite with Reigns. That just earns him a Superman punch into an Orton powerslam into the Claymore so McIntyre can get the elimination.

The RKO hits McIntyre and Edge adds a spear, followed by a double RKO from Orton and Edge. Orton teases the RKO to Edge but begs off…and gets eliminated by Edge. We’re down to Reigns, Edge and McIntyre with Reigns and Edge slugging it out. The Superman punch hits Edge but the spear misses, allowing Edge to hit his own.

Reigns hangs onto the bottom rope to stay alive and he pulls Edge to the apron with him. Edge gets knocked off and Reigns gets back in for the fight with McIntyre, who nails the Claymore. McIntyre tosses Reigns to win at 1:00:09 (Sally, I know you’re smiling. Don’t worry if you don’t get this reference.).

Rating: B+. The ending is what matters most here, as McIntyre has been ready to move up to the next level for the better part of ever now. They FINALLY pulled the trigger on him and while it is another step to win the World Title at Wrestlemania, this is a heck of a good sign for him and his future.

Then there’s the first half of the Rumble and your mileage is probably going to vary. I wasn’t wild on it, but it didn’t ruin the match for me. I didn’t need Lesnar to run through that many people, but at least the right person won in the end and we should be in for a big Wrestlemania showdown. It could have been a lot worse, and McIntyre winning warms the cockles of my heart (whatever cockles are).

Drew looks very emotional to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. It’s a good show and WAY better than last year’s (partially due to it being half an hour shorter) with Reigns vs. Corbin and Bayley vs. Evans not being great. Other than that, it’s a very solid show with two good Rumbles and one good winner. Becky vs. Asuka was awesome too and Bryan vs. Fiend was solid storytelling. Wrestlemania is feeling a lot more interesting than it was just a few days ago and that’s the best feeling you can have coming out of this show. Now just keep it up going into Tampa.

Results

Roman Reigns b. King Corbin – Spear

Charlotte won the Women’s Royal Rumble last eliminating Shayna Baszler

Bayley b. Lacey Evans – Rollup with trunks

Fiend b. Daniel Bryan – Mandible Claw

Becky Lynch b. Asuka – Disarm-Her

Drew McIntyre won the Men’s Royal Rumble last eliminating Roman Reigns

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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Smackdown – January 29, 2021: What Zaniness

Smackdown
Date: January 29, 2021
Location: Tropicana Field, St. Petersburg, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves

It’s the final show before the Royal Rumble and that means there are probably going to be a few surprises to really hammer things home. That can be a good thing but sometimes they leave you wondering if this is really all that WWE has to offer. Hopefully that is not the case here as there are some things that need to be upgraded. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is Daniel Bryan to get things going and he is rather excited that it is Royal Rumble weekend. As his daughter likes to say, we are just two sleeps away. Bryan talks about being proud of everything he has accomplished in his career, but he has one thing left to do: win the Royal Rumble and go on to the main event of Wrestlemania. No one knows what that means more than him and to climb that mountain one more time involves him going through twenty nine other men.

The honest truth is that he doesn’t know how many more Wrestlemania Moments he has left, but if he wants to go to the main event one more time, he is going to have to win the Royal Rumble. The Alpha Academy has him ready and he can’t wait to see everything you’ll only see at the Rumble….and here are AJ Styles and Omos. AJ talks about throwing everyone over the top to win the match, with Omos adding in that AJ is here because of the Quarterly Brand To Brand Invitational.

With that idea having been successfully dragged out of mothballs, AJ says Bryan doesn’t look ready for the Rumble. Bryan is in his sports coat, so AJ thinks Bryan might be the GM again. The challenge is on for tonight and AJ shoves him down, with Omos getting between them. Bryan seems in, and if Omos is there or not, Bryan is going to give AJ a beating.

We look back at Bayley and Bianca Belair running the obstacle course, with Bayley attacking Belair after losing.

Bayley brags about winning, plugs Belair’s WWE Network Chronicle special, and promises to beat her again tonight. Then Belair can go into the dark-est hole of her life.

Bianca Belair vs. Bayley

The 8K cameras are back and yeah they’re still creepy in a way. Belair slams her down a few times to start and it’s already a standoff. A suplex gives Belair two but Bayley is back up with a running clothesline for two. Belair’s arm is banged up so Bayley shouts DING DONG, which is enough to make Belair snap. A bunch of forearms to the back have Bayley out on the apron, followed by a standing moonsault back inside for two. We take a break and come back with Belair driving shoulders into Bayley’s ribs in the corner but Bayley fights back.

Cole says Bayley is jealous, prompting Bayley to shout “I’M NOT JEALOUS MICHAEL!” A knee to the face gives Bayley two (the replay made it look even worse) and it’s time to go back to Belair’s arm. The middle rope elbow gives Bayley two but Belair grabs a crucifix for the same. Back up and Belair punches her in the face but the bad arm gives out on a Glam Slam attempt. Belair manages a hot shot though and the KOD finishes Bayley at 10:48.

Rating: C+. Belair has grown on me at a crazy level over the last year and I’m liking her more and more in the ring every time. A win in the Royal Rumble isn’t out of the question and that is pretty impressive given that she only debuted in the Royal Rumble last year. Good stuff here, with Bayley putting her over clean to give Belair a huge win.

Post match Belair can’t believer what she has accomplished because that was the biggest win of her career. She sounds like she is near tears and says the only thing that tops this is winning the Royal Rumble.

Dominick Mysterio vs. King Corbin

Dominick jumps Corbin during the entrances and the beatdown is on in the aisle as we take a break. We come back with Rey Mysterio on commentary and the opening bell, which sees Dominick make Corbin chase him. That lets Dominick hit (mostly) an awkward looking slingshot knee to the head. Back in and Corbin hits a belly to back suplex and knocking Dominick down while shouting at Rey.

Dominick manages to send him into the corner and nails a middle rope dropkick as Rey coaches from the floor. The 619 is broken up so Dominick settles for a hurricanrana into the corner. Corbin sends him face first into the corner as well, only to have Dominick come back with a tornado DDT for two. Corbin cuts him off again though and the End of Days is good for the pin at 4:44.

Rating: C-. Dominick continues to seem like he is trending towards a heel turn and the more I think about it, the more interested I kind of am in seeing it. That’s about as non-committal of a position as I can come up with for it but that’s just how Dominick goes. He doesn’t have much to him other than being Rey’s son, but at least he can do a thing or two in the ring.

Post match Corbin goes after Rey but gets taken out.

Big E. offers Sonya Deville a dollar and an Arby’s coupon to find out his Royal Rumble number. That isn’t happening, so here are Miz and John Morrison (erg) to suggest they might cash in on Roman Reigns tonight. Morrison makes some Gamestop stock jokes and that’s enough for Sonya to leave. Big E.: “I love the pop culture reference too.” He has things to do though so a lot of laughter ensues but Big E. gets serious and calls them over the hill with no chance to win the Royal Rumble. The brawl is on with Big E. not having much trouble taking both of them out. Referees break it up.

Tomorrow on Backstage: Tamina vs. Natalya to determine the #30 entrant in the Royal Rumble. So they’re doing that instead of the men’s #30 and the women’s #1 and #2? Sure why not.

We look at Sasha Banks defeating Reginald last week, which gave Carmella a Royal Rumble title shot.

Sasha Banks is walking through the back when Kalisto hits on her a bit. With that out of the way, Sasha runs into Reginald, who offers her a bottle of win to go with losing her title. Banks hits on him and then promises to break Carmella’s jaw. Reginald can keep the wine because he needs a drink.

Long video on Kevin Owens vs. Roman Reigns.

Bad Bunny will be performing his song about Booker T. at the Royal Rumble.

Sami Zayn stops Shinsuke Nakamura in the back because he finds it suspicious that the Raw wrestlers are here. He also thinks Nakamura and Cesaro are splitting up so since Sami helped liberate Nakamura, it’s time for Nakamura to return the family. Sami needs his Intercontinental Title back and takes credit for everything Nakamura has done in NXT and WWE. Nakamura says he appreciates everything Sami has done but Sami can go to h***.

We get a split screen sitdown interview with Roman Reigns and Kevin Owens (in an Ever Rise shirt). Owens doesn’t think anything is going to be different on Sunday because he has beaten Reigns twice. There is nothing that Reigns or his family can do to keep Owens down because he will be the Last Man Standing. Paul Heyman joins Reigns and tells Owens not to speak of the tribal chief that way. Owens asks if Reigns is going to let Heyman rehash his old statements so Reigns says we should talk about Owens’ family.

What kind of a man was Owens’ father? Owens’ father is (not was) a great man, so Reigns needs to watch where he is going. Reigns asks if Owens’ father is a smart man, which Owens confirms and again warns Reigns about where he is going with this. Reigns says Owens isn’t built for this because he isn’t a castle, a knight, a bishop or a queen. Owens is a pawn and Reigns is the king because everything revolves around him.

What Owens doesn’t understand is that he will never be Universal Champion and it isn’t his fault. That makes Owens a fool and his father a fool too. If that’s the case, it means Owens’ grandfather is a fool as well. Owens isn’t happy but says he knows what Reigns is trying to do. On Sunday, they’re going to be in the same room, but Reigns says Owens still doesn’t get it. One day Owens is going to see his grandfathers again and they are going to call him a disgrace for not acknowledging Reigns as his tribal chief.

Owens throws his water down and says the only thing his grandfathers would acknowledge Reigns as is a delusional jackass surrounded by yes men. Reigns is some mafia boss who projects toughness to hide that he is an emotional bully. Owens goes off, shouting about how his family made him the man he is today.

After Sunday, he is going to be the same Kevin Owens, but he’ll be Universal Champion. Reigns’ feed cuts out and Owens storms off. This was GREAT and you could feel the emotion because it felt like two adults talking with one of them going very personal to drive the other over the edge. The mind games were awesome but the emotions were better and that’s why this feud has worked so well.

Video on Goldberg vs. Drew McIntyre.

AJ Styles vs. Daniel Bryan

Omos is here with AJ but AJ sends him to the back to do this one on his own. Cesaro is on commentary as they go to the mat with AJ not being able to keep Bryan down. The test of strength lets them trade some flips until Bryan’s cross armbreaker sends AJ over to the ropes. Bryan starts working on the arm but AJ gets up for a shoulder. There’s a knee to the ribs to put Bryan down again but he’s right back with a butterfly suplex.

Cue Sami Zayn (he’s got signs) for a distraction though, allowing AJ to knock Bryan off the top. A whip into the steps has Bryan down and we take a break. Back with AJ slowly pounding Bryan down but a running corner dropkick rocks AJ for a change. There are some kicks to the chest as Cesaro is getting annoyed at Sami at ringside. A top rope hurricanrana gives Bryan two but AJ is right back with the Calf Crusher.

The rope is finally grabbed and Sami yells about how the referee is finally doing his job. The Phenomenal Forearm is pulled out of the air though and the YES Lock (or most of one) goes on, with AJ getting a foot on the rope. Hold on though as here’s Big E. to run Sami over but Cesaro jumps Big E. for his efforts. Bryan dives onto Cesaro and Sami but AJ throws him back inside. That’s enough for Sami to come in to jump Bryan for the DQ at 12:10.

Rating: B-. There was a lot of stuff going on at ringside but I think I can live with twelve minutes of these two doing their awesome things to each other. This was what you would expect from an AJ vs. Bryan match and as usual, I could have gone for another twenty minutes of so. Like they wouldn’t have made it work.

Post match Cesaro beats on Big E. in the ring but here’s Shinsuke Nakamura to kick Sami and AJ in the head. Nakamura and Cesaro have a staredown but Sami is up to knock Nakamura into Cesaro, meaning nothing bad can happen. The villains are sent outside and it’s time for a smark dream six man (With I guess Big E. being the least internet friendly name?).

AJ Styles/Cesaro/Sami Zayn vs. Shinsuke Nakamura/Daniel Bryan/Big E.

Nakamura misses a sliding knee to start and gets clotheslined down by Cesaro. Nakamura hits a kick to the back of the head as Cole tries to figure out the lineups (this seems to be a little tricky for him). A front facelock lets Nakamura drag Cesaro into the corner for the tag to Big E., who is uppercutted down. Sami comes in to strike away at Big E.’s head, which doesn’t seem to hut that much as he’s over for the tag to Bryan without much effort.

A double hiptoss drops Sami to give the already legal again Big E. two. Sami kicks Bryan in the back of the knee to put him in trouble and AJ wraps the leg around the post. We take a break and come back with AJ stomping on the knee and giving it a DDT. Zayn’s superplex is broken up though and Bryan nails a missile dropkick.

The hot tag brings in Big E. for the rapid fire belly to belly suplexes to all three villains. Cesaro is back up with that sweet springboard corkscrew uppercut for two but the Neutralizer is broken up. Big E. loads up the Big Ending but this time it’s Miz and John Morrison coming out to jump Nakamura and Big E. for the DQ at 9:53.

Rating: C+. This was another good one with quite the talented lineup so I’m not sure how much you can complain here. I mean aside from the same ending, but given how much time there is left in the show, I think you know where this is going. The Royal Rumble shows always have something like this going on so it’s forgivable to see this much interference, even if it was in a pretty nice match.

Post match the big beatdown is on but here’s Otis for the save and yes indeed that’s where we’re going. Otis cleans house as commentary asks who is going to be able to dump him over the top. Last week Bianca Belair fireman’s carried him and walked around with him. I don’t think it’s that big of a task. Anyway a double Caterpillar hits Miz and Morrison and we take a break.

AJ Styles/Cesaro/Sami Zayn/Miz/John Morrison vs. Shinsuke Nakamura/Daniel Bryan/Big E./Otis

Miz and Bryan go straight to the brawling to start as Cole thinks it’s a ten man tag, with Corey Graves being there to handle the counting and explain that it’s a handicap match. Miz takes Bryan outside and drops the knee onto the announcers’ table, setting up the Figure Four back inside. That’s broken up with some right hands (a counter you don’t see often enough) but Sami comes in with a Blue Thunder Bomb. Graves: “We could be two days away from the Road To Zaynylvania!”

Morrison comes in to put Bryan down again and Miz adds a kick to the ribs. Bryan finally manages stereo crossbodies with AJ and everything breaks down without Bryan making a tag. Cue Sheamus to be the partner though and the hot tag brings in in to run over everyone. The Irish Curse sets up the Cloverleaf on Sami but Morrison makes the save. The parade of secondary finishers is on with Sami being the last man standing. That doesn’t last long though as Sheamus hits a heck of a Brogue Kick to pin Sami at 5:25.

Rating: C. I didn’t hate this and some of that is due to Sheamus kicking Sami’s head off at the end. It was a little chaotic and having it come after about thirty five minutes was a lot, but the talent was all there and they did some chaotic action at times. Now granted I’m not sure how much this helps build the Rumble, but at least it was something different. I can completely get someone not liking it though as it was rather WWE with all of the rapid fire additions.

Post match (of course) Miz and Morrison jump Sheamus but Braun Strowman makes his big return to wreck EVERYONE to end the show. Now that works as a big moment to hype up the Rumble.

Overall Rating: B-. This was a rather weird show but I liked what I got out of the whole thing. Owens and Reigns had a great segment and the last forty or so minutes were designed to build to the Rumble. It’s not like the pay per view needs that much build so anything we got here was a bonus. Much like the main event(s), I can see why someone wouldn’t be a fan, but I want to see the Rumble and that’s what matters the most.

Results

Bianca Belair b. Bayley – KOD

King Corbin b. Dominick Mysterio – End of Days

Daniel Bryan b. AJ Styles via DQ when Sami Zayn interfered

Daniel Bryan/Big E./Shinsuke Nakamura b. AJ Styles/Cesaro/Sami Zayn via DQ when Miz and John Morrison interfered

Daniel Bryan/Big E./Shinsuke Nakamura/Otis/Sheamus b. AJ Styles/Cesaro/Sami Zayn/John Morrison/Miz – Brogue Kick to Zayn

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Royal Rumble Count-Up – 2019 (2020 Redo): The Man And The Man’s Man

Royal Rumble 2019
Date: January 27, 2019
Location: Chase Field, Phoenix, Arizona
Attendance: 48,193
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Renee Young, Byron Saxton, Tom Phillips

It’s time to go back to the stadium with another major show. The Royal Rumble has changed a good bit in recent years as it is now another extended show with a pair of Royal Rumble matches instead of just one. No one is exactly jumping off the page as a favorite in either of them, though Becky Lynch is currently the most popular person in the company. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Bobby Roode/Chad Gable vs. Scott Dawson/Rezar

Non-title but if Dawson and Rezar (regular partners injured) win, the regular teams get a title shot each. And yes, this match was completely necessary as a last minute addition. The match is so awesome that a cameraman falls down during Roode and Gable’s entrance for the always fun camera shot. Drake Maverick is with Dawson and Rezar. Dawson’s headlock on Roode doesn’t get very far as Roode takes him into the corner for a monkey flip from Gable. Wilder wouldn’t have let that happen.

An exchange of near falls doesn’t go very far so Gable hits a springboard spinning crossbody for two. Dawson takes him down though and catapults Gable into a chokeslam to put the champs in trouble. Rezar chokes on the rope and Dawson grabs a northern lights suplex for two. The chinlock doesn’t last long as it’s back to Rezar to keep knocking Gable around.

Dawson sends him into the ropes but they bang heads for a double knockdown. Rezar comes back in and tries another chokeslam but Gable reverses into an armbar over the ropes. That’s enough for the hot tag off to Roode, who hits a spinebuster on Dawson. Back up and Dawson dropkicks Rezar by mistake, leaving Roode to take a neckbreaker/moonsault combination for the pin at 6:55.

Rating: D+. This would be a textbook definition of a match that did not need to be added to the show and did nothing more than fill in time. As usual, that’s not a good idea and yet it keeps happening around here almost every show. I’m not sure how much of a point there was to having the makeshift tag team thrown out there to lose when Akam wasn’t going to be back for months. Nothing good here and a match that didn’t need to happen.

Kickoff Show: United States Title: Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Rusev

Nakamura is challenging and Lana is here with Rusev. Nakamura gets driven into the corner for some shoulders to the ribs and a suplex brings him right back out. They head outside but Nakamura gets in a running kick to the face off the steps, setting up the running knee to the jaw. Back in and Bad Vibrations into the running knee to the ribs gets two and we hit the front facelock. Rusev fights up and punches away, setting up the spinwheel kick for two.

A suicide dive is blocked with a kick to the head so Rusev knocks him over again. Nakamura kicks him in the head again so Rusev scores with the Machka Kick and a swinging release Rock Bottom. Since Rusev stops for half a second though, Rusev pulls him into a triangle choke, which is countered with a suplex. That works so well that Rusev loads up a superplex, only to get reversed into a Landslide for two. Nakamura goes for the turnbuckle pad but Lana gets on the apron (and grabs her ankle) to point it out. That just results in Rusev knocking her down by mistake, setting up Kinshasa for the pin and the title at 10;15.

Rating: C-. Just a little better than the opener but not all that much. Nakamura taking the title from Rusev just over a month into the title reign doesn’t exactly mean much, but that’s the case with so many of the midcard title changes around here. The match was a watchable enough power exchange but it still feels like a title change for the sake of a title change.

Kickoff Show: Cruiserweight Title: Hideo Itami vs. Kalisto vs. Akira Tozawa vs. Buddy Murphy

Murphy is defending, one fall to a finish, and Ariya Daivari is here with Itami. They circle each other for a bit until Itami rolls to the floor. That leaves the other three to trade rollups for two each until Murphy hits a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker to drop Tozawa. Kalisto’s very springboardy hurricanrana is broken up as everything breaks down again. Kalisto tries a Cannonball off the apron but gets caught in Murphy’s suplex instead.

Itami gets back in and poses, meaning it’s time for the showdown with Murphy. The champ gets struck down in the corner and Itami demands respect as we can see his future going down the drain in a hurry. Murphy goes outside and tries to powerbomb Kalisto into the barricade, only to have Tozawa hit a suicide dive into Kalisto, which sends Murphy into the barricade for a crash. Itami throws Kalisto and Tozawa back inside so he can get two on each of them.

A Murphy distraction lets Kalisto kick Itami in the head and it’s a monkey flip to send Tozawa onto Murphy on the floor. Murphy comes back in and gets missile dropkicked by Tozawa, only to have Itami break up the top rope backsplash. Itami gets knocked to the outside though and Tozawa hits a suicide headbutt. Kalisto and Murphy follow with dives of their own with the champ getting the best of it.

Back in and Kalisto hits a hurricanrana driver for two on Murphy, who is right back up with a Liger Bomb for his own near fall. Tozawa scores with a reverse hurricanrana on Murphy but it’s Itami breaking that up. The Salida Del Sol gets two on Itami and everyone is down. A series of kicks puts everyone down again for a bit so Murphy knees Kalisto and Tozawa. Murphy slips out of whatever Itami’s spinning knee deal was (I STILL don’t get that one) and knees him down as well, setting up Murphy’s Law to retain at 12:06.

Rating: B-. Now that’s more like it with an action packed twelve minute match that actually felt like it mattered for a change. Or at least it felt like a match that had been set up more than thirty seconds before they came to the ring. Murphy continues to look like a star and it’s easy to see why he’s a much bigger deal just a year later.

The opening video looks at how important the Rumble is, with some great historical footage included. It has more history than any show not named Wrestlemania so it’s a smart move to go into that well. This switches into your regular opening video, which does its usual good job at looking at the rest of the card.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Becky Lynch vs. Asuka

Asuka is defending after taking the title from Becky in a TLC match at TLC, with Charlotte being included as well. Becky is on fire at this point and it’s a matter of time before she gets the big hero moment. They go with the aggressive lockup to start and that goes absolutely nowhere. Becky’s running shoulder earns her a running dropkick and a lot of shouting from the champ. Neither of them can get the arm so Asuka kicks her in the leg for two instead.

Becky is right back up with shots to the face and a kick to the ribs, followed by a running clothesline to sent Asuka to the floor. They switches places and you just don’t do that to Asuka, who scores with the running hip attack. Asuka heads outside as well and gets sent into the apron, only to send Becky into the post. The Bexploder sends Asuka into the barricade though and Becky is starting to seethe.

That means the aggressive stomping in the corner and the next of what is likely to be a bunch of armbars. That’s broken up so Becky avoids another hip attack and hammers away in the ropes. Asuka isn’t about to get beaten up though and pulls Becky into the Asuka Lock while still in the ropes. With that broken up, Becky fights out of the corner and grabs a Disarm-Her in the corner. That doesn’t last long either so Asuka knees her out of the air. Asuka strikes away but misses a missile dropkick so Becky can hit a Rock Bottom for two.

Back up again and they fight to the apron with Asuka hitting a fisherman’s neckbreaker to the floor and they’re both down. Asuka is in first and Becky beats the count, earning herself a basement dropkick to the head. They slug it out until Asuka kicks her head off for two. Asuka goes up so Becky stops her with a kick of her own and a super Bexploder gets a rather near fall as the crowd is staying right with them.

The middle rope legdrop misses though and Asuka catches her in a Disarm-Her. To keep up the same line of thinking, Becky gets her own Asuka Lock before switching to the Disarm-Her. Becky is too weak to get it on in full so Asuka rolls out and grabs the Asuka Lock and flips forward Cattle Mutilation style for the tag at 17:09.

Rating: B+. These two beat the heck out of each other and that finisher was the mega death version of the Asuka Lock. It’s really weird to see Becky lose though and it was even more surprising watching this live as Becky was the hottest thing around. Having her tap is a bit much, but sweet goodness would they get mileage out of that loss. The counters and different styles were awesome here though and it’s a near instant classic.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Shane McMahon/The Miz vs. The Bar

The Bar is defending and Miz’s dad is in the front row. Miz and Shane are together because of the Best In The World tournament but Shane has agreed to be nice to him so they can succeed together. In other words, expect the Shane Show to continue. Shane spears Sheamus down at the bell and it’s time for an early breather. Miz comes in to roll Cesaro up for two but it’s way too early for the Skull Crushing Finale.

Sheamus grabs Miz from behind to hold him in the corner though and Cesaro scores with the running uppercut. A right hand knocks Shane to the floor so Miz kicks away to avenge his fallen partner. They all head outside with Miz having to be saved from a double powerbomb through the announcers’ table. It’s too early for the big elbow through the table so Shane hits a top rope clothesline on Sheamus instead.

Shane gets sent hard into the barricade and that should let him stay down and use up all the oxygen in the first three rows. Back in and Sheamus drops a knee on Miz before cranking on the arm. The ten forearms to the chest and a double suplex back in get two as Shane is back up onto the apron. Cesaro drops a middle rope ax handle for two and Sheamus comes back in to talk more trash.

Miz sends Sheamus to the floor though and a backdrop puts Cesaro down as well. That’s finally enough for the hot tag to Shane and it’s bad punches a go-go. A DDT gets two on Sheamus and Shane loads up Coast To Coast to both of them at once. Cesaro pulls him out of the air and into the Swing though and it’s a rather long one this time.

Since it was just a really long Swing, Shane is right back with a triangle choke. Sheamus makes a save and it’s the spike White Noise for two, with no one making the save. Well you knew he was going to kick out of at least one finisher. Miz is back in to save Shane from the Brogue Kick, which hits Cesaro by mistake. The shooting star press finishes Cesaro for the titles at 13:23.

Rating: C. It’s every complaint about a Shane match that you could find: he’s pushed too hard, he looks ready to explode from hyperventilating after about eighteen seconds and he kicks out of a big finisher. Oh and now he’s a champion, naturally getting the pin in the process. It had already gotten bad and it was only going to get worse from here.

Shane and Miz celebrate with Papa Mizanin as the announcers get to praise Shane a bit.

Cole announces the attendance and Meltzer has a correction out immediately.

We recap Ronda Rousey vs. Sasha Banks. Rousey wants to see Banks get fired up and is ready to show us the difference between a Boss and a champion. Sasha promised to prove how good she was and made Natalya tap in a tag match on Monday. Graves: “It’s one thing to make Natalya submit.” Nice little unintentional insult there.

Sasha isn’t concerned about keeping her emotions in check. Tonight, she’s proving that she’s the best in the world.

Raw Women’s Title: Sasha Banks vs. Ronda Rousey

Rousey is defending and goes straight for the armbar but Banks armdrags her right back down. A springboard armdrag doesn’t work that well and Rousey mocks Banks’ pose. Rousey tries her own Three Amigos but Banks blocks the third, only to have to go to the ropes to avoid an armbar. A kick to the ribs puts Banks on the floor but Rousey punches the post by mistake.

That lets Banks hit a suicide dive to put Rousey down for a change. The chinlock doesn’t last long so Banks hits the running knees in the corner instead. Back up and Rousey hits a running elbow to the face for two so Banks hits a running knee of her own for the same. Rousey shrugs it off and loads up Piper’s Pit but gets reversed into a nasty armbar, complete with some finger bending.

Banks switches over into the Bank Statement but it’s broken up in a hurry. Now Piper’s Pit can connect and Rousey armbars her over the ropes. Rousey goes up but gets superplexed right back down so Banks can go back to the armbar. You don’t do that to Rousey, who rolls Banks over with some judo throws. They go outside with Rousey grabbing the armbar in full to make Banks tap.

Back in and Rousey hammers away in the corner but Banks gets in a shot of her own for the double knockdown. The armbar is broken up again and another Piper’s Pit is countered into a crossbody. The Bank Statement goes on until Banks switches to a Fujiwara armbar. Rousey rolls out and gutwrench suplexes the heck out of her, setting up another Piper’s Pit for the pin at 13:49.

Rating: B. This took time to get going but they were rolling at the end. Rousey was such a freak of nature as she probably hadn’t had 25 matches by this point (certainly not 10 big ones) and was going back and forth with one of the best around on the big stage. The battle of the submissions attempts worked well here and I got way into this all over again.

Post match they do a left handed handshake since Banks’ arm is wrecked. Banks does hold up the Horsewomen sign though because she isn’t the nicest loser in the world.

We recap the Kickoff Show. We’re so lucky.

John Cena has been injured and won’t be participating in the Royal Rumble. He was totally and really here and everything though. Honest. Braun Strowman is replacing him.

Beth Phoenix joins commentary.

Women’s Royal Rumble

90 second intervals and Lacey Evans (making her main roster in-ring debut, save for a random Main Event match) is in at #1, meaning she needs to introduce herself. Natalya is in at #2 and Lacey runs the ropes to start. Neither can hit a dropkick and Lacey can’t quite do a nip up. A clothesline can’t get rid of Natalya and she reverses a powerbomb with a hurricanrana. Natalya hits the discus lariat as Mandy Rose is in at #3, sending Graves over the edge all over again.

Another discus lariat drops Mandy and it’s the double Sharpshooter, which Graves says is like the even more stuffed Oreos. Liv Morgan is in at #4 and is out in less than ten seconds. Lacey and Mandy start double teaming Natalya but Lacey sends Mandy into the corner for the double Bronco Buster. Mickie James is in at #5, giving us the first non-blonde. House is cleaned in a hurry until Mickie has to save herself from being tossed by Mandy. Ember Moon is in at #6 and gets to clean house as well. No one can eliminate anyone else and it’s Billie Kay in at #7.

She’s fine with staying on the floor though, saying she’s going to wait for Peyton Royce to go in. More non-eliminations continue and it’s Nikki Cross in at #8 (Graves: “Batten down the hatches.” I really need to find out what hatches are and what it means to batten something.). She runs over Billie at ringside and then dives onto everyone else inside. Mandy and Nikki have a weird showdown with Nikki getting the better of it. Billie is inside now and get beaten up as well because she isn’t great on her own. Peyton Royce is in at #9 and it’s IIconics time. The team beats down Nikki and it’s time to fight on the ropes some more.

Tamina is in at #10, giving us Lacey, Natalya, Mandy, Mickie, Ember, Billie, Nikki Peyton and Tamina, meaning the ring is too full. Tamina gets to wreck people until Nikki gets to have another not that interesting staredown. A dropkick and tackle put Tamina through the ropes but she’s right back in with a kick to Nikki’s face. Mickie low bridges Tamina to the apron but she comes back in with the Superfly Splash to Nikki. A superkick gets rid of Mickie and it’s Xia Li in at #11.

Li kicks away at a lot of people but gets knocked down by Tamina. Sarah Logan, in Braveheart paint, is in at #12 as the ring is full and the crowd is dead. Ember has to hang on by her feet but pulls herself back in (finally a reaction) and the IIconics get rid of Cross. Charlotte is in at #13 and PLEASE get rid of some people. She gets jumped on the way in but everyone is fought off in a hurry. Lacey eliminates both IIconics at once and Charlotte kicks Li out to finally clear the ring a bit. Charlotte and Tamina have a staredown (NO ONE CARES ABOUT TAMINA!!!) and Charlotte gets rocked by a superkick.

Kairi Sane is in at #14 and she runs to the ring while looking through a telescope because of course she does. Charlotte gets rid of Tamina as Sane dives in. Charlotte chops Sane down but she’s right back up with the Insane Elbow to Logan. That’s enough to get rid of Sarah and it’s Maria Kanellis in at #15. She breaks up a staredown between Charlotte and Lacey, including a double bulldog. Charlotte is back up with a spear to Maria, who apparently doesn’t belong in this ring.

Naomi is in at #16 and that wakes the crowd up a bit. Mandy sends Naomi to the apron but gets backdropped out, only to pull Naomi to the floor. The feet don’t touch so Naomi backflips onto the barricade, tightrope walks across, and does a crazy athletic jump from the barricade to the steps. And then Mandy pulls her off the steps for the elimination anyway in a great heel move. Charlotte kicks Lacey out and it’s Candice LeRae in at #17. Candice Black Widows Ember but it’s broken up in a hurry.

Natalya powerbombs Charlotte out of the corner and it’s Alicia Fox in at #18 (I had almost forgotten about her.). Maria wants to be friends with Alicia so they beat up Sane. Alicia puts her captain’s hat on Maria before stopping to dance. Maria throws it on the ground and stomps on it….sending Alicia into a fit. She’s back up to eliminate Maria though as Kacy Catanzaro is in at #19 and starts with the hurricanranas. A slingshot version puts Alicia on the apron but she skins the cat to come back in.

Zelina Vega is in at #20, giving us Natalya, Moon, Charlotte, Sane, Candice, Alicia, Catanzaro and Vega. Candice and Vega slug it out as fallout from Andrade vs. Johnny Gargano but they slow down, meaning it’s yet another lull. Ruby Riott is in at #21 and has Logan and Morgan with her so all three pull Charlotte to the floor for some triple teaming. Fox gets the same treatment and Vega rolls to the floor to hide underneath the ring.

Riott throws Fox back inside and then eliminates her, followed by a powerbomb into the barricade for LeRae and another elimination. Dana Brooke is in at #22 and hits a weird looking sitout powerbomb on Catanzaro. Now the Squad pulls Brooke to the floor (I really can’t stand this whole people being on the floor but not eliminated deal as it makes things more confusing than they need to be) and Riott eliminates Sane. Io Shirai is in at #23 and dropkicks the Squad down, setting up the big moonsault to the floor (she was never in so it’s not an elimination).

Shirai and Riott go over the top to the apron for a slugout but they both get back in. Rhea Ripley is in at #24 but the star power hasn’t started for her just yet. She wrecks things a bit until Moon takes her down with a wheelbarrow faceplant. Brooke kicks Catanzaro to the floor but she holds her legs up, hand walks to the post, flips up to it and climbs back in to blow away Naomi’s save. Ripley blocks Catanzaro’s spinning DDT though and tosses her out for real.

Sonya Deville is in at #25 and spears Moon down but Brooke hits her with a shoulder. Brooke enziguris Ripley but gets sent to the apron and dropkicked out. Vega leans from under the ring to laugh at Brooke….and here’s freaking Hornswoggle to chase Vega back inside. That doesn’t last long as Ripley throws her out, with Hornswoggle chasing Vega to the back. Alexa Bliss is in at #26 to a MAJOR pop in her first match since September. The moonsault knees to the ribs hit Moon but Sonya pounds Bliss down in the corner. Bliss is right back by sending her to the apron though and a right hand gets rid of Sonya.

Bayley is in at lucky #27 and gets her own house cleaning segment, including a clothesline to get rid of Riott. That’s not all though as she knocks Ripley out as well as Lana is in at #28. Well not in really as she can barely walk due to her ankle injury from earlier. The trainer comes out to check on her in the aisle as Shirai saves herself from an elimination. Lana is still being checked on as Nia Jax is in at #29, only to jump Lana in the aisle for a bonus.

Fit Finlay comes out to tell her to go to the ring and it’s time for the giant to wreck some people. Shirai makes the mistake of trying a moonsault and gets knocked out in a hurry. Natalya somehow gets Jax up for a fireman’s carry but can’t do anything else with it and gets eliminated after 56 minutes. Carmella is in at #30 (an honor she won in Mixed Match Challenge), giving us a final group of Moon, Charlotte, Bliss, Bayley, Lana, Jax and Carmella, though Lana hasn’t gotten anywhere near the ring.

Carmella gets in a dropkick on Moon but Jax runs her over. Hold on though as Lana is still down so here’s Becky Lynch to say she wants the spot instead. Finlay says do it and the fans are WAY into this again. Becky gets the long awaited showdown with Jax but Charlotte breaks it up and sends Becky to the apron. That doesn’t work either and it’s Becky coming back in with a missile dropkick to Jax. Bliss goes after Moon and pulls her to the apron by the hair (freaking ow man) and then chokeshoves her out after a rather ridiculous 53 minutes.

Carmella hits a Bronco Buster on Bliss and there’s a Buckle Bomb from Bayley. Carmella and Bayley team up to throw Bliss out so Jax clotheslines them both. Charlotte saves Becky from Jax’s facebreaker so Carmella gives Becky a Downward Spiral instead. For some reason Charlotte goes up top so Carmella tries a running headscissors, only to get sent to the apron.

That lasts all of two seconds but Charlotte puts her out there again and a big boot gets us down to four (Bayley, Jax, Charlotte and Becky). Bayley dropkicks Charlotte and Jax against the ropes but Jax is right back with a big boot to eliminate Bayley, leaving us with three. The three way showdown is on with Jax splashing both of them in the corner. That sends Becky to the floor (not out) and it’s a Charlotte vs. Jax showdown that is a little more interesting than it sounds.

Something like a slow motion AA has Jax in trouble but Charlotte can’t follow up. Charlotte gets her onto the apron and Becky pulls her out, leaving us with Charlotte vs. Becky in the rivalry that won’t end. Hold on though as Jax shoves Becky off the steps and we have a knee injury. Referees check on her but Becky pulls herself back in for the fight. Well kind of at least as Becky falls straight back down as soon as she’s inside.

Becky says it’s her time and Charlotte has already taken enough from her. Charlotte, obviously, goes right after the knee but Becky kicks her in the face. She sends Charlotte to the apron but another kick to the leg cuts off the rally. Charlotte misses a charge though and a forearm sends Becky to Wrestlemania at 1:11:23.

Rating: D+. The Becky parts made it better but WOW this was badly laid out. There were far too many instances of people just standing around and doing nothing with several people staying in there too long. Ember for 52 minutes? Natalya for 56? Mandy Rose for nearly 26? You don’t need everyone in there for that long and it’s ok to come up with something other than “everyone stays on the ropes while two people do something in the middle” over and over. They got the right winner but it was a heck of a chore to get there.

Becky can barely stand but is very pleased with the results. The celebration goes on for a LONG time.

We recap AJ Styles vs. Daniel Bryan for the Smackdown World Title. Bryan turned heel to steal the title and became the crazy environmentalist so, after losing to Brock Lesnar at Survivor Series, it’s time for a (second) rematch. AJ is out to show that he isn’t complacent, which included attacking Vince McMahon in a story that went nowhere.

Smackdown World Title: AJ Styles vs. Daniel Bryan

AJ is challenging. We get the Big Match Intros and AJ hammers him down in the corner so the champ bails for a bit. Back in and they fight on the mat for a bit with AJ’s wristlock not getting him very far. A headlock works a bit better as the first gear work continues. Bryan bails to the floor again but comes back in….to get punched in the face. An uppercut puts Styles in the corner and he gets dropped chest first onto the post to give Bryan a target.

Bryan starts in on the shoulder and cranks on a hammerlock on the mat with Styles having to use his foot to reach a rope. A cross armbreaker is broken up as well so Bryan punches him in the face to even the score. AJ scores with a dropkick and the pinfall reversal sequence gets some near falls each. Bryan tosses him hard into the corner and that means the running dropkick.

A dragon suplex has AJ (with his bloody nose) rocked again and Bryan kicks him off the top and out to the floor. Bryan goes out after him but it’s the moonsault off the barricade into the perfect reverse DDT (that’s one of the best he’s ever hit). Back in and the springboard 450 hits Bryan’s knees, meaning the LeBell Lock goes on. Not to be outdone, AJ escapes and reverses into the Calf Crusher to stay on the knee.

That’s broken up as well and they’re both down for a bit. Bryan gets up first and kicks away at the arm, setting up the big kick to the head for two. AJ catches him on top and they slug it out up there, with Styles backflipping out of a belly to back superplex. The Calf Crusher goes on again before AJ switches to a cradle for two instead. Neither can get a backslide so AJ grabs a brainbuster for two more.

The Phenomenal Forearm is broken up with a kick to the arm but AJ kicks him away. The bad arm means he can’t use the regular springboard so he tries another version, only to get kicked out of the air again. They’re both down again…so here’s Erick Rowan of all people. Bryan knocks the referee down by mistake though, allowing Rowan to come in with a claw slam to Styles so Bryan can retain at 24:33.

Rating: B+. I’m not wild on the ending but you can’t have AJ lose a clean fall here. They were working a heck of a match here with both of them going with their own style and having the other broken down. I don’t particularly care for Rowan interfering, but he and Bryan would wind up being a nice enough team so well done, even if it wasn’t the best feeling at the time.

Post match Rowan holds AJ up for the running knee from Bryan so things can continue.

We recap Finn Balor vs. Brock Lesnar for the Raw World Title in a match hyped up as David vs. Goliath. Balor is small but can do extraordinary stuff so he wants to fight Lesnar. This isn’t the Demon for reasons of Balor wanting to do it himself, even though the Demon IS Balor, meaning the whole thing doesn’t make a lot of sense. Or they just don’t want Lesnar losing because that wouldn’t be very Lesnarish.

Raw World Title: Finn Balor vs. Brock Lesnar

Lesnar is defending and we get the Big Match Intros. Balor dropkicks him at the bell to start and another running dropkick sends him into the corner. The first belly to belly cuts him off in a hurry though and we settle down for the first time. Another belly to belly on the floor rocks Balor again and it’s time to load up the announcers’ table.

Balor sends him ribs first into the corner of said table though and he does it again for painful measure. Brock can barely stand up as he throws Balor back inside for the shoulders in the corner. Another belly to belly has Balor flying but Lesnar is wincing a bit. Lesnar gets in yet another suplex but this time Balor is up with a Sling Blade. That’s it for the offense though as Lesnar BLASTS him with a clothesline.

Lesnar can’t hit a German suplex though as the stomach gives out. The F5 is countered into a DDT and Balor gets smart by stomping at the ribs. The big flip dive to the floor puts Lesnar down again and Balor hits a second for good measure. A third flip dive takes Lesnar down again but Renee says we’re having a new champion to end Balor’s hopes. Back in and Balor kicks him in the face, setting up the Coup de Grace for two, with Lesnar spinning into the Kimura on the kickout, making Balor tap at 8:36.

Rating: C+. Well that was short. They had some moments in there but at the same time, Lesnar wasn’t exactly doing much for the first half of the match. It got better once he was selling but there are only so many things you can do in less than nine minutes. The stuff with Lesnar’s stomach being messed up was enough to go somewhere, but this was only so good.

Post match Lesnar beats Balor up a few more times. This is something else that went nowhere.

Jerry Lawler and JBL join commentary.

Men’s Royal Rumble

90 second intervals again and Elias is in at #1, meaning it’s time for a song. Well make that insulting Phoenix until he’s interrupted by Jeff Jarrett of all people at #2. Jeff gets to strut and say ain’t I great as Elias is rather pleased by being interrupted by someone who brings something to the table. For now though, they need to sing together. And yes, they really are doing this three hours and forty minutes into a show with an hour long match to go. Jeff goes to spell his name so Elias hits him in the face to get things going.

Elias hammers away on the ropes and hits a clothesline so he can get in another catchphrase. A guitar shot to the back is enough to get rid of Jeff. Shinsuke Nakamura, last year’s winner, is in at #3 and he wastes no time in kicking Elias down. For some reason Elias goes up top for Old School, though it’s just an armdrag instead of a shot to the back. Kurt Angle is in at #4 to a big reaction and he starts in with the suplexes. Elias gets him in the corner though and it’s Big E. in at #5, with his gear including Kofi’s best Rumble moments. That’s rather cool….I think.

The Warrior Splash hits Nakamura but an Angle Slam takes Big E. down. Nakamura is back up with the running knee to Angle’s ribs and another running knee gets rid of Kurt. Honestly, it’s better to have him out that fast before he hurts himself again. Johnny Gargano is in at #6 and gets to clean house on Nakamura and Big E. The slingshot spear cuts Elias down and it’s Jinder Mahal in at #7. After he knocks everyone down, Gargano knocks Mahal out in about thirty seconds. The Singh Brothers get beaten up for a bonus and now it’s back to something that actually matters.

Samoa Joe is in at #8, just as Nakamura is surrounded in the corner. Elias gets kicked down and Joe just walks away from Gargano’s middle rope dive (that will always be cool). Joe dumps Big E. and it’s Curt Hawkins in at #9, still in the middle of his horrible losing streak. Hawkins gets in a few shots but bails to the floor in what is probably a smart move. The fans get behind Hawkins, even as Joe grabs him in the Koquina Clutch. For some reason Elias breaks that up and Hawkins bails to the floor again, this time hiding underneath the ring.

Seth Rollins is in at #10, giving us Elias, Nakamura, Gargano, Samoa Joe, Hawkins and Rollins. The springboard clotheslines hits Elias and there’s the Falcon Arrow to Gargano. Elias gets sent to the apron and then into the post for the elimination. It’s Titus O’Neil in at #11 and he crosses himself before charging to the ring, only to stop himself before getting to the apron in a funny moment. Titus sees Hawkins hiding underneath the ring and chases him inside, only to be eliminated almost immediately. Joe throws Hawkins out a second later to end the harmless comedy segment.

With the ring a little more cleared out, Kofi Kingston is in at #12 and things settle down a bit. As everyone fights by the ropes, Mustafa Ali is in at #13. Joe is waiting on him so Ali scores with a dropkick, only to get grabbed by Nakamura. That’s fine with Ali, who slips over the back and tells Nakamura to COME ON. Nakamura does just that and gets tossed out by Ali in quite the upset. Ali isn’t done either as he hits a tornado DDT on Gargano, only to get planted by Joe. Dean Ambrose, still in his pretty disastrous heel run, is in at #14 and goes right at it with Rollins, as expected.

With that broken up, Dean sends Kofi over the top but Kofi keeps one foot off the ground and rolls over to the steps to save himself. That’s not as good as his others, but maybe he’s crashing underneath the expectations. Kingston comes back in with a DDT to Dean, who is right back up to get rid of Gargano. No Way Jose, with the Conga Line, is in at #15 and Joe literally eliminates him in two seconds. No worries though as he and the Conga Line dance to the back as that was quite the use of an entrance.

Drew McIntyre is in at #16 and headbutts Jose for dancing too close to him. After cleaning some house, Joe and McIntyre slug it out for the hoss fight. The Claymore drops Joe and there’s one for Rollins as well as Xavier Woods is in at #17. As he is coming in, Kofi is knocked off the apron but sunset flips Woods, allowing him to keep one foot up.

Woods stands up with Kofi on his back (Cole to JBL: “I remember when you and Ron used to do this.”) and walks over to the steps for the real save of the year. Then McIntyre eliminates Woods and Kingston a second later because this show doesn’t like fun to last too long (completely appropriate for McIntyre of course). Pete Dunne is in at #18 and that gets a nice reaction. Dunne goes after Joe and Graves is rather pleased with everything going on at the moment.

Ali hangs on after being thrown to the apron and it’s Andrade in at #19. Andrade goes after Dunne in a match that sounds rather interesting indeed. With no one close to an elimination, Apollo Crews is in at #20, giving us Joe, Rollins, Ali, Ambrose, McIntyre, Dunne, Andrew and Apollo. McIntyre is sent to the apron and it’s Aleister Black (without the riser) in at #21. He goes right after Dunne in another match that sounds awesome (it’s almost like Dunne is great or something) but switches to Ambrose, with Black Mass connecting for the elimination.

Shelton Benjamin is in at #22 and goes at it with Crews for the athletic freak off. Crews saves himself from being eliminated as Shelton gets Koquina Clutched. That’s broken up and Ali dumps Joe in an upset. Baron Corbin is in at #23, fresh from his shift at *insert restaurant joke of the day here*. Deep Six drops Ali but he hangs onto the rope so Corbin knocks out Crews instead. Black and McIntyre slug it out and it’s Jeff Hardy in at #24 to keep the talent field high.

The Twisting Stunner hits Shelton and the Whisper in the Wind hits several people at the same time. Dunne bends Black’s fingers and Corbin tosses Black, followed by McIntyre doing the same to Dunne to clear some space. Rey Mysterio is in at #25 and charges into a chokebreaker from Corbin. With everyone fighting by the ropes, it’s Intercontinental Champion Bobby Lashley in at #26…and Rollins eliminates him in about fifteen seconds. How many times do they need to do that in one match?

Lashley pulls Rollins, who low bridged him out, to the floor and beats the heck out of him to let off some steam. Rollins is spinebustered through the announcers’ table and it’s Braun Strowman in at lucky #27 for a possible (though unlikely) winner. Strowman knocks Corbin out in a hurry and there goes Benjamin a few seconds later. McIntyre dumps Hardy as Dolph Ziggler, his recent rival, is in at #28. That means a superkick to get rid of McIntyre and it’s Randy Orton in at #29 for the slow walk to the ring.

Strowman is right there for the showdown and the RKO is blocked in a hurry. Andrade loads up a superplex on Ali, so Strowman puts them BOTH on his shoulders with Mysterio diving off the top to take them down in your HOW CAN HE DO THAT spot of the match. R-Truth (also here because of the Mixed Match Challenge) is in at #30….but hang on as Nia Jax of all people jumps him from behind to take his spot, continuing the near trolling levels of a push. That gives us a final group of Rollins, Ali, Andrade, Orton, Strowman, Ziggler, Orton and Jax.

Nia gets to wreck some people and Ali is out in a hurry after a surprising thirty plus minutes. Orton stares Jax down but can’t hit the surprise RKO attempt, earning himself a shoulder down. Jax tells Rey to go for the 619 on Orton but cuts him off, only to get superkicked by Ziggler. The 619 hits Jax and Orton connects with the RKO, setting up a baseball slide from Mysterio to get rid of her.

Orton tosses Mysterio and Andrade dumps Orton, leaving us with Ziggler, Andrade, and Rollins and Strowman on the floor. Strowman comes back in and splashes Andrade and Ziggler in the corners to send them outside again. Hold on though as Strowman needs to go to the floor again to run Rollins over.

Everyone goes after Strowman in a 2004 flashback but he gets rid of Andrade and Ziggler. Rollins uses the momentum to put him on the apron but charges into a chokeslam. Back in and Rollins grabs a guillotine to pull Strowman to the apron and sends him into the post. A kick to the ribs sets up the Stomp on the apron to get rid of Strowman to give Rollins the win at 57:34.

Rating: B. This was much more like it with a nice mix of brawling, comedy, action and an only somewhat guaranteed winner. I know you can’t really hide the fact that someone is a shoe in winner but it’s nice to see them at least giving it a little bit more drama. Rollins winning made sense here as he had been on fire for the last year and needed something like this. Good Rumble, though there have been a lot better.

SIGN POINTING, yes I said SIGN POINTING, ends the show.

Overall Rating: B-. I’m curious to see how this one holds up against the original rating as the length was driving me crazy this time around. There is a lot of good stuff on here but EGADS it’s a two hour Kickoff Show and then four hours and forty minutes of the main show. You really needed to have the weird Tag Team Title deal on the Kickoff Show and then put Miz and Shane on the main show? That, plus Bryan vs. Styles, could have been on a big Smackdown at worst and this show could have been trimmed down by 45 minutes.

The only bad thing on here is the women’s Royal Rumble, but when that one match is nearly an hour and fifteen minutes long, it has quite the negative impact on the rest of the show. The men’s match makes up for it and the card is much better than worse, but they really, really need to stop with these shows getting close to (or over in Wrestlemania’s case) seven hours. It doesn’t matter how good it is. If you’re going three hours over the length of Wrestlemania X7, the time is going to cause a lot of problems. Anyway, good show, which could have been great with a big editing job.

Ratings Comparison

Chad Gable/Bobby Roode vs. Scott Dawson/Rezar

Original: D+

2020 Redo: D+

Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Rusev

Original: C

2020 Redo: C-

Buddy Murphy vs. Hideo Itami vs. Akira Tozawa vs. Kalisto


Original: C+

2020 Redo: B-

Asuka vs. Becky Lynch

Original: B+

2020 Redo: B+

The Bar vs. Shane McMahon/The Miz

Original: D

2020 Redo: C

Sasha Banks vs. Ronda Rousey

Original: B+

2020 Redo: B

Women’s Royal Rumble

Original: B

2020 Redo: D+

AJ Styles vs. Daniel Bryan

Original: C-

2020 Redo: B+

Brock Lesnar vs. Finn Balor

Original: C+

2020 Redo: C+

Men’s Royal Rumble

Original: D

2020 Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: D+

2020 Redo: B-

WOW. I was actually shocked by the original ratings of those Rumbles and the Styles vs. Bryan match. I’ve mellowed a lot since then as the show really isn’t that bad.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

https://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/01/28/royal-rumble-2019-i-almost-had-a-birthday-watching-this-show/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Royal Rumble Count-Up – 2019 (Original): It’s Still Going Somewhere

Royal Rumble 2019
Date: January 27, 2019
Location: Chase Field, Phoenix, Arizona
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Renee Young, Byron Saxton, Tom Phillips

It’s the first of the Big Four pay per views and that means it’s time to really get going with the busiest season of the year. In this case that means a pair of Royal Rumble matches, which may or may not have the highest levels of drama. I’m not sure who we’ll be seeing tonight, but it could be interesting. Let’s get to it.

The stadium looks huge, though it doesn’t look full.

Kickoff Show: Bobby Roode/Chad Gable vs. Rezar/Scott Dawson

THIS NEEDED TO BE ADDED TO THE SHOW??? If Rezar and Dawson win, both of their teams get future title shots. Akam is injured at the moment in case this is even more confusing than it seems. As a bonus, the cameraman falls over while trying to get a closeup of Roode during his entrance. Roode and Dawson start things off with Scott getting caught in a wristlock. It’s back to Gable but Rezar comes in to hammer away with the heavy forearms.

With Gable properly beaten, Dawson comes in for a suplex, followed by a chinlock. That’s rather old school of him. Back up and they slug it out until a shove into the ropes sends Gable head first into Dawson, meaning a double knockdown. Rezar comes in but gets caught in the armbreaker over the ropes. Everything breaks down and Dawson runs into Rezar by mistake, setting up the moonsault/neckbreaker combination to finish Dawson at 6:55.

Rating: D+. Well that was a distinct waste of time. The match was added to the card as a bonus and the not exactly interesting champions defeated their makeshift challengers, as in the team they should beat, without much effort. So much for having the Revival get somewhere out of all their recent drama, at least for one night. You couldn’t possibly have Rezar lose here you see. He doesn’t have a partner at the moment, but it makes more sense to beat half of the Revival. Again.

Kickoff Show: US Title: Rusev vs. Shinsuke Nakamura

Rusev is defending and goes straight with the corner shoulders to the ribs. A running clothesline puts Nakamura on the floor but he gets in a shot against the barricade to take over. Back in and some Bad Vibrations set up the running knee to the ribs as they’re doing just about the same match (at least the same pace) as before. The knees to the head don’t do too much damage to Rusev as he’s right back with the spinwheel kick for two.

Nakamura bails to the floor so Rusev loads up a suicide dive (!), which is cut off by a kick to the head. Well thank goodness for that. Nakamura fires off more kicks to the head for a near fall but Rusev ax handles him down. You don’t see that one very often, but you do see the Machka Kick, which makes it even worse.

Rusev gets caught in a triangle choke until a suplex finally gets him out of trouble. Nakamura kicks him down again so the referee checks on Rusev, allowing Nakamura to go after the turnbuckle pad. It’s Lana offering a distraction but she gets knocked off the apron and hurts her ankle. Rusev is distracted again, and this time a running knee to the back of the head gives Nakamura the title back at 10:15.

Rating: C. I’m so glad they gave Rusev the title so they could give it back to Nakamura to restart his nothing reign. That title is the kiss of death at the moment with no one getting anything out of it. It’s not like either of them being champion means anything more than the other, but this is kind of a confusing choice.

Kickoff Show: Cruiserweight Title: Buddy Murphy vs. Akira Tozawa vs. Kalisto vs. Hideo Itami

Murphy is defending and it’s one fall to a finish. Everyone goes for rollups to start but can’t get anywhere so Tozawa puts Murphy in a Black Widow. Kalisto makes a save and snaps off a hurricanrana to send Murphy outside. Itami starts cleaning house and wins a strike off with Murphy, followed by knocking Kalisto outside.

Tozawa’s dive takes Murphy out but Kalisto gets back in to clean house, including monkey flipping Tozawa off the apron onto Murphy. This time it’s Tozawa heading back inside to take over, capped off by the suicide headbutt on Itami. Buddy is back up with the running flip dive to the floor onto all three. Kalisto is up first with a hurricanrana driver for two on Murphy as the all over the place offense continues.

Murphy powerbombs Kalisto out of the corner for the same with Tozawa having to make a save. The Salida Del Sol gets a VERY close two on Itami but Murphy takes over again. It’s Itami hitting an enziguri on Murphy so Tozawa and Kalisto break it up with stereo superkicks. Murphy is right back up and countering whatever Itami’s finisher is supposed to be, setting up Murphy’s Law to retain at 12:07.

Rating: C+. This was exactly what it was supposed to be with a bunch of spots and all kinds of entertainment going on. It didn’t need to be anything more than a fast paced spotfest and that’s what they did here. Murphy retaining is fine and I liked the match well enough. It also didn’t overstay its welcome, which is often a problem with a match like this. Good stuff here.

The opening video looks at what the Rumble means, both as a show and as a match itself. This includes some history of the match, meaning some comedy, which doesn’t really fit with the serious nature of the video.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Asuka vs. Becky Lynch

Asuka is defending after taking the title from Becky in a triple threat match last month. Becky gets shoved down as there’s a rather loud high pitched noise. Back up and Asuka kicks the leg out but gets hip attacked out to the floor. Asuka misses the running kick off the apron and gets her own leg kicked out to put Becky in control for the first time. Back in and Becky sends her face first into the corner before stomping away for good measure. It’s too early for the arm but Asuka misses the running hip attack and gets caught in the ropes.

That’s fine though as it’s the Asuka Lock from the ropes for a few seconds. The missing continues though as Asuka goes shoulder first into the post, setting up a Disarm-Her in the ropes. Becky dives into a knee to the face though and the hip attack connects for two. The missile dropkick misses and Becky gets her own two off a bell to belly. Asuka is right back with most of an Asuka Lock, allowing Becky to roll to the ropes.

They fight to the apron and it’s a fisherman’s neckbreaker (I think) Asuka onto the floor for a huge (and scary looking) crash. They’re both alive and get back in for the slugout with Becky getting the better of it. Asuka gets caught in a super Bexploder for a very close two as the fans are getting way into these near falls.

Becky misses the middle rope legdrop though and gets pulled into the Disarm-Her, which is reversed into an Asuka Lock (on Asuka) for a pretty sweet sequence that you don’t see from the women. Asuka flips back for two and there’s the big kick to the head. Becky pulls her down into the Disarm-Her but this time it’s Asuka escaping. The full Asuka Lock goes on and Asuka flips forward into something close to Cattle Mutilation for the clean tap at 16:37.

Rating: B+. Very good match here with some crazy counters, though having Becky tap clean feels like a bad idea. I fully expect her to come back in and win the Rumble for the title shot, but this was a great example of WWE booking themselves into a corner. This could have been Charlotte losing instead and giving Asuka her win back from Wrestlemania, but instead they take something away from Becky before she’s likely winning later in the night, or at Elimination Chamber. Just seems unnecessary.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Shane McMahon/The Miz vs. The Bar

Shane and Miz are challenging in matching baseball jerseys. Shane takes Sheamus down at the bell because that’s what you do to a four time World Champion. We officially start with Cesaro vs. Miz as Miz can’t get a Skull Crushing Finale. The double teaming begins in the corner so it’s Shane running over for a quick save. Shane gets knocked off the apron (I think that’s enough to make Sheamus a five time World Champion) but he’s right back to save Miz from a powerbomb through the announcers’ table.

The big elbow is broken up so Shane hits a top rope clothesline on Sheamus instead. Cesaro uppercuts him in the face though and the double backbreaker gets two on Miz. Sheamus hits a middle rope knee to the chest for the same and it’s off to the ten forearms to the chest for a bonus. Miz fights out of a chinlock as this is somehow still going. The hot tag brings in Shane for the umping elbow to Sheamus and the horrible spinning DDT on Cesaro. Coast to Coast is broken up by Cesaro so Shane knocks him into the corner as well.

Since Shane can beat up one of the most successful tag teams of the modern era on his own. Thankfully Cesaro counters into the Swing, and it’s a LONG one with the fans giving him a quick standing ovation. Shane is fine of course and grabs what was supposed to be a triangle choke until Sheamus makes the save. Miz gets dropped on the floor and the spike White Noise, which pinned Seth Rollins last year, gets two. Miz breaks up the Brogue Kick so it takes out Cesaro instead, setting up Shane’s shooting star press for the pin and the titles at 13:23.

Rating: D. Not only was the match boring, but Shane McMahon just won a title in 2019. This is also the second stupid title loss for the Bar in less than a year after they lost to a ten year old at Wrestlemania. I’m sure they’ll get the titles back, but my goodness what is the point in this? To set up Shane vs. Miz at Wrestlemania? Is that what anyone wants to see?

We recap Ronda Rousey vs. Sasha Banks. Rousey tried to be nice to Banks but Sasha got serious and promised to make Rousey tap. That was enough to set Rousey off and we have a fired up champ.

Raw Women’s Title: Ronda Rousey vs. Sasha Banks

Rousey is defending. It’s way too early for the submissions so Rousey throws her into the corner and stops for some taunting. Rousey goes for Three Amigos but has to slip out of a Bank Statement attempt. Back up and Banks slaps her in the face, earning herself a kick to the ribs. They fight outside with Rousey punching the post, allowing Banks to hit a heck of a suicide dive. Things finally slow down a bit with Rousey grabbing a chinlock until Banks shoves her into the corner for some running knees.

An elbow to the face puts Banks down but she comes back up with some loud slaps to the back. The Rope walk sets up a Codebreaker to the bad arm and a running knee gets two. More running knees miss in the corner so Rousey tries Piper’s Pit, only to be reversed into a heck of an armbar on the bad arm. Rousey starts to roll out but gets pulled into the Bank Statement. It’s too close to the ropes though and now Piper’s Pit connects.

For some reason Rousey goes up top, earning herself a superplex for two. The armbar goes on again as you can’t say Banks isn’t focused. Rousey is all fired up and hits three straight judo throws by the arm. Banks sends her outside again though and Rousey’s arm is just hanging there. Another suicide dive is countered into the Beast Mode armbar on the floor to make Sasha tap, which didn’t make a ton of sense but looked awesome as you got the Death Stare.

Back in and Rousey unloads with right hands and a running knee of her own for two. Banks sends her arm first into the corner again though and it’s a double stomp onto the arm. The Backstabber is countered into an armbar attempt but another Piper’s Pit is countered into a crossbody for two. The Bank Statement can’t quite go on so it’s a Fujiwara armbar in the middle of the ring. Rousey rolls out of that as well and it’s a gutwrench suplex into Piper’s Pit for the pin at 13:48, though it looked like Rousey’s shoulders were down as well.

Rating: B+. I liked this even more than I was expecting to and it was a heck of a match. The arm stuff made sense and I’m glad they went with that instead of the back/ribs stuff that we’ve done a few times now. Banks looked more motivated than she has in years here and that’s not exactly surprising. As a bonus, Rousey was really showing off the athleticism here and made herself look even more talented than usual. Very good match and worth seeing.

Post match Rousey tries to show respect and gives her the Four Horsewomen sign but Banks isn’t having it and storms off.

Kickoff Show recap.

Women’s Royal Rumble

90 second intervals. Beth Phoenix is out for commentary and it’s Lacey Evans in at #1 and gives a rather condescending promo about wanting to clean up the division. Natalya is in at #2, which is quite the letdown after that kind of a setup. Lacey flips away from Natalya to start but they both miss dropkicks at the same time. The nipup doesn’t quite work for Lacey and it’s a wristlock to keep her in trouble. A hurricanrana takes Natalya down though and it’s Mandy Rose in at #3.

Natalya is right back up and does the still ridiculous looking double Sharpshooter until Liv Morgan is in at #4….and is eliminated in about two seconds off a Natalya backdrop. Lacey turns on Mandy but stops to pull a napkin from her trunks and wipe down a bit before throwing it at the other two (make your own Priscilla Kelly jokes). Mickie James is in at #5 and kicks Natalya in the head. No one goes for an elimination until Ember Moon is in at #6 to a big reaction (complete with a CGI moon, making me want to play Major’s Mask). Moon gets in all the usual until Mandy catches her in the corner.

Billie Kay is in at #7 but says she’s staying outside until Peyton Royce is here. Smart move actually and perfectly legal. Nikki Cross is in at #8 and sprints to ringside where she beats up Kay. House is cleaned but Lacey manages to avoid getting thrown out. Kay is inside now as the ring is starting to get too full. Peyton Royce is in at #9 and helps Billie up to go after Nikki. Some double teaming keeps her in trouble but there’s no elimination as Tamina is in at #10.

We currently have Evans, Natalya, Rose, James, Moon, Kay, Cross, Royce and Tamina. Kay goes after Tamina and nearly gets thrown out, but instead Tamina goes after Cross and this the top rope splash. A superkick puts James out and it’s Xia Li (of the Mae Young Classic) in at #11. Some kicks to the head drop Tamina and even more put everyone else down. Xia stands tall as Sara Logan is in at #12. The IIconics get together and dumb Cross in a rather quick elimination.

Charlotte is in at #13 and you can tell things are getting serious. Li gets sent to the apron and booted out as the ring is suddenly a lot less full. Tamina scores with a superkick and it’s Kairi Sane in at #14. The IIconics seem to have been eliminated as Sane is having way too much fun with her telescope. Charlotte gets Tamina out and there’s the top rope forearm from Sane to Moon. Charlotte welcomes the chops from Sane, who moves on to knocking Logan down.

The Insane Elbow connects and Natalya knocks Logan out. Maria Kanellis is in at #15 to get us to halftime and hopefully write off some of the rumors about her leaving. A double bulldog has Charlotte and Moon down but for some reason Maria stops for a dance, allowing Charlotte to nail her with a spear. Naomi is in at #16 and hits a sitout jawbreaker on Rose, as you had to expect.

A suplex to the apron sets up a kick to the head and Mandy is out. Naomi takes her time on the apron though and gets powerbombed against the barricade, only to kick Mandy in the head and crawl up onto the barricade. The tightrope walk lets Naomi get around for a Kofi Kingston-esque dive to the steps (that was VERY impressive) but Mandy pulls her to the floor anyway. Charlotte kicks Evans out and it’s Candice LeRae in at #17 for another NXT surprise. A Black Widow has Ember in trouble but she comes back with a gutbuster to put Candice down.

Natalya powerbombs Charlotte out of the corner and it’s a dancing Alicia Fox at #18. Fox fires off dropkicks and Maria offers a friendship, which Fox can go with, at least for the time being. A dropkick to Sane sets up a DDT and it’s time to dance again. Maria hands Fox her captain’s hat, which goes on Maria’s head for a change. Maria STOMPS ON THE HAT though and Fox is furious…as she throws herself on the mat in a near fit. Yet another dropkick puts Maria out and Kacy Catanzaro (NXT) is in at #19.

Some headscissors let Kacy put some people down with one putting Fox onto the apron. Zelina Vega (as someone from Street Fighter) is in at #20, giving us Natalya, Moon, Charlotte, Sane, LeRae, Fox, Catanzaro and Vega. LeRae and Vega go at it as a followup from NXT and it’s Ruby Riott, flanked by Morgan and Logan, in at #21. The Squad pull people underneath the ropes to cause some chaos but do managed to eliminate Fox and LeRae as Vega is hiding underneath the ring.

Dana Brooke is in at #22 and hits a heck of a sitout powerbomb on Catanzaro. The Squad keeps pulling people outside without eliminating most of them as Io Shirai is in at #23. She beats up the Squad in short order and hits the moonsault to the floor (she was never in so it’s not an elimination).

Riott and Shirai fight to the apron and it’s Rhea Ripley in at #24. She throws Catanzaro to the floor but Catanzaro lands on her back, allowing her to backflip onto the barricade and then hand walk to the post, where she flips up and climbs back in. Ripley throws her out without much of a problem, but WHAT THE HECK WAS THAT AND WHY CAN SHE DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT???

Sonya Deville is in at #25 and Brooke is eliminated as Vega keeps watching…..and Hornswoggle pops out from underneath the ring skirt next to her. The chase is on and Vega goes inside where she’s eliminated in short order. Alexa Bliss makes her return at #26 and moonsaults into double knees to Moon’s chest. A sunset bomb plants Charlotte and it’s Sonya unloading on Bliss in the corner. Bliss gets rid of Sonya and it’s Bayley (to a pop) at #27.

That means the pace can pick up and it’s Riott and Ripley being tossed out. Lana is in at #28 and selling the ankle from earlier in the night. The fans are begging for Becky to come out and take her place as Lana has taken over a minute to get about a third of the way to the ring. Nia Jax is in at #29 and jumps Lana on the way to the ring so I think you know where this is going. Shirai moonsault onto Jax but gets thrown outside, landing hard onto her ankle. Jax throws Natalya out as well and it’s Carmella in at #30, giving us a final field of Charlotte, Bayley, Jax, Sane, Moon, Bliss and maybe Lana, who never got in the ring.

With Carmella taking Jax down, here’s Becky to appeal to Fit Finlay (I call international collusion!) to let her take Lana’s spot. Finlay agrees and we have the final field. We get straight to the Becky vs. Jax showdown and Becky unloads on her to a freaking roar. Bliss pulls Moon to the apron and it’s a leg trip to get rid of Moon after 53 minutes. Bayley gives Bliss a buckle bomb and that’s enough for the elimination.

That leaves us with Bayley, Nia, Carmella, Charlotte and Becky. Jax gets knocked through the ropes and Charlotte reverses a running headscissors from Carmella but cant’ get rid of her. A running big boot knocks Carmella out and Bayley sends Charlotte to the apron. Nia throws Bayley out (with Bayley clutching her knee on the landing) to get us down to three. Becky rolls to the floor and Charlotte fireman’s carries Nia….nowhere actually.

Nia goes over the top and Becky pulls her out, leaving us with Charlotte vs. Becky, much to the fans’ approval. Nia pulls Becky off the apron though and we’ve got a knee injury. Becky charges inside anyway and gets her leg taken out rather quickly. Charlotte cranks on the leg but Becky pops up and sends her to the apron. A running shot is enough to get rid of Charlotte to give Becky the win at 1:11:23.

Rating: B. I think I liked this one more than last year’s. The winner was the predictable (not a bad thing) and right call, but the bigger deal here was the lack of legends. It’s a good sign that the divisions have grown enough that they can have one of these without having so many people added to the match from years past. The NXT women were a nice touch and the match never felt like it was dragging.

I wouldn’t mind for it to be a little less messy though, as there were too many people on the floor at various times and a few too many spots of people saving themselves. That being said, Catanzaro is not human and that save was incredible, likely more impressive than most of Kofi’s. The Hornswoggle spot was hilarious too and I’m very relieved that he was used for that instead of a Rumble entry. Good match here, as the division looks a lot deeper this year.

We recap the Smackdown World Title match. Daniel Bryan turned heel back in November and won the title from Styles via a low blow. AJ Styles has turned it up a few notches though and is now the REAL AJ Styles again. This should be a heck of a match if given time, but it’s almost 10:00 and we have two World Title matches and a Royal Rumble to go.

Smackdown World Title: AJ Styles vs. Daniel Bryan

Bryan is defending. AJ starts fast and slugs away but gets sent hard into the post for a trip to the floor. The shoulder is sent into the post again and it’s off to a hammerlock. Bryan seems very pleased with AJ possibly having a bloody nose and hammers away on the mat some more.

AJ gets back up with a suplex and right hands of his own, only to get suplexed onto the back of his head. Bryan gets sent outside for some kicks to the face as this is severely dragging. Back in and they trade submission finishers with AJ CRANKING on the leg in a painful looking visual. The rope is grabbed and Bryan kicks him down again. They head up top with AJ flipping out of a belly to back superplex before grabbing the Calf Crusher.

That’s broken up again but AJ gets kicked out of the air on a springboard attempt. Bryan takes the Pele though and they’re both down. Cue Erick Rowan of all people as they get back up, only to have Bryan enziguri the referee by mistake. The Styles Clash hits Bryan, drawing in Rowan to chokeslam Styles. The referee revives to count the pin as Bryan retains at 24:18.

Rating: C-. This is a good example of a match that wasn’t exactly great and didn’t need to take place at this point. It’s nearly 10:30 and we’re going to be lucky to finish this show by midnight. They’re already doing a rematch from Bryan pinning him clean and it was just to set up Rowan as Bryan’s enforcer. This wasn’t the right place and it came at the wrong time. It’s not bad, but it didn’t need to go this way.

We look at the big brawl after last night’s Takeover, which set up a six man tag during halftime of the Super Bowl.

We recap Finn Balor vs. Brock Lesnar. It’s literally billed as David vs. Goliath, with the much smaller Balor earning the shot when Braun Strowman lost his shot after destroying Vince McMahon’s limo. Balor seems to be in over his head but wants to fight, as is his custom.

Universal Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Finn Balor

Balor is defending and charges straight at Lesnar at the bell. A few more shots have him in trouble but he catches a charge with a belly to belly. Balor wisely rolls outside with Brock following, only to get sent ribs first into the announcers’ table. Back in and it’s more belly to bellies to put Balor in more trouble.

A clothesline turns Balor inside out but Lesnar’s ribs are still banged up. Lesnar goes to finish with the F5, which is reversed into a hard DDT. Balor stomps away at the ribs and gets in a jumping double stomp. They head outside with Balor nailing the running flip dive as Lesnar is in trouble. Back in and the Coup de Grace connects for two, but Brock slaps on the Kimura for the tap at 8:37.

Rating: C+. This was good while it lasted but it was way too short and there was no way it was going to be much more without the extra time. Balor was game and trying with Lesnar doing his usual very good selling, but with less time than a Raw main event, there wasn’t much they could do.

Post match Balor hits some more German suplexes and an F5.

Jerry Lawler and JBL come out for commentary.

Men’s Royal Rumble

Elias is in at #1 and let’s have a song. Before he can sing though, it’s Jeff Jarrett in at #2 for the big music off. Jeff does his catchphrases and they agree to a duet but Elias punches him in the face and a guitar shot is enough to get rid of Jarrett. Shinsuke Nakamura is in at #3 and goes straight at Elias in the corner. Elias pops up with a rope walk as Kurt Angle is in at #4. Suplexed abound and it’s Big E. in at #5. The Big Ending to Big E. doesn’t work and it’s a bunch of knees, including one in the corner to get rid of Angle. Johnny Gargano is in at #6 and it’s a running hurricanrana on Elias.

A not great looking tornado DDT drops Big E., followed by the slingshot spear to Elias (Johnny must not like him). Jinder Mahal is in at #7 and after a few knees, is eliminated by Gargano. The Singh Brothers aren’t done though as they get dragged in for a beatdown from Elias and Big E. Samoa Joe is in at #8 and gets a rather strong reaction. The sidestep avoids Gargano’s middle rope kick to the face and a rake to the eyes is enough to get rid of Big E.

Curt Hawkins is in at #9, hits a forearm to Joe’s back, and then bails to the floor. For some reason he comes back in, only to walk into the Koquina Clutch. Elias makes a save so Hawkins can bail to the floor for some hiding underneath the ring. It’s Seth Rollins in at #10, giving us Elias, Nakamura, Gargano, Joe, Hawkins (underneath the ring) and Rollins. Seth gets rid of Elias in a hurry and it’s Titus O’Neil in at #11, complete with stopping to make sure he doesn’t slide underneath the ring.

Instead he sees Hawkins and goes after him underneath the ring, only to charge after him and get tossed in a hurry. Joe dumps Hawkins though and it’s Kofi Kingston in at #12. Rollins runs Nakamura over with an elbow and the clock seems to be getting a little faster as Mustafa Ali is in at #13. That means a rolling X Factor to Joe and a COME ON to Nakamura. Shinsuke charges and that’s enough for an elimination.

Ali hits a tornado DDT on Gargano but he runs into the overhead belly to belly from Joe into the corner. Dean Ambrose is in at #14 and it’s time for the showdown with Rollins. Dean knocks Kofi to the floor but Kofi puts his feet on the apron and rolls over until he gets to the steps. Kofi comes back in with a top rope DDT to Ambrose but Dean is right back up with Dirty Deeds to Gargano. Johnny is out but Kofi hits Dean with Trouble in Paradise. No Way Jose is in at #15 and is out so fast that he might have broken Santino Marella’s record.

No worries though as he and the conga line dance straight to the back. JBL: “Does he realize that he was just eliminated from the Royal Rumble?” Drew McIntyre is in at #16 and headbutts Jose before wrecking some of the conga line. It’s a series of Claymore kicks, including a great one to Joe, to put everyone down. Kofi gets knocked over the top as Xavier Woods is in at #17. As Kofi is getting shoved to the floor, he sunset flips Woods with only one foot touching, allowing Woods to stand up and piggyback Kofi to the steps. Once inside, Drew clotheslines them both out in a funny bit.

Pete Dunne is in at #18 and goes straight after Ali. Joe can’t suplex him and it’s time to go after a bunch of fingers. Dunne suplexes Ali onto Joe and Andrade is in at #19. A spinning DDT plants Dunne as there is some crazy talent in there. Apollo Crews is in at #20, giving us Joe, Rollins, Ali, Ambrose, McIntyre, Dunne, Andrade and Crews. Things slow down and it’s Aleister Black in at #21. A huge kick drops Ali and another one eliminates Ambrose. Shelton Benjamin is in at #22 with Paydirt to Benjamin, followed by Ali dumping Joe.

Baron Corbin is in at #23 with a good Deep Six to Ali and a right hand to get rid of Crews. It’s Jeff Hardy in at #24 as Black and McIntyre take turns seeing how hard they can kick people. Corbin gets rid of Black and McIntyre dumps Dunne as Rey Mysterio is in at #25. Rey walks straight into a chokebreaker from Corbin and Andrade stomps away. Bobby Lashley is in at #26…and is out in about ten seconds thanks to Rollins. Lashley is livid and pulls Rollins outside for a spinebuster through the announcers’ table. It’s Braun Strowman in at #27 and he gets rid of Corbin with ease.

Shelton is out as well and it’s Dolph Ziggler in at #28. Hardy is knocked out and Ziggler gets rid of McIntyre as a bonus. Randy Orton is in at #29 and gets to stare down Strowman but the RKO is easily blocked. The powerslam connects and Strowman puts Andrade in an electric chair, while Andrade superplexes Ali. Rey adds something close to a high crossbody for the big crash, followed by Strowman going shoulder first into the post, as is his custom. R-Truth is in at #30….and Nia Jax jumps him from behind?

Nia takes his place, giving us Mysterio, Andrade, Ziggler, Orton, Strowman (on the floor), Ali, Rollins (on the floor) and Jax. Nia dumps Ali out and gets to star Orton down. The RKO is blocked so Ziggler superkicks Nia into the 619 (JBL: “Rey don’t do that!”). An RKO takes Jax down and it’s Rey baseball sliding her out. There’s an RKO to get rid of Rey but Andrade throws Orton out. We’re down to Ziggler, Strowman, Rollins and Andrade with Ziggler and Andrade striking it out.

Strowman comes back in to run them both over as Rollins is getting back up. That means the running shoulder on the floor and Strowman throws him inside, where the triple teaming begins on the monster. Strowman pops back up to get rid of Andrade and knocks Ziggler out as well. Rollins puts Strowman on the apron but charge into a chokeslam. Not over the top, but a chokeslam nonetheless. They get back in and Rollins pulls him to the apron by the head ala Chris Benoit and Big Show. It’s not enough for an elimination so Rollins sends him into the post and adds a Stomp for the win at 57:34.

Rating: D. It’s really hard to hate a match that had that kind of stretch in the teens but my goodness they missed on the final batch. Nia Jax as #30 wasn’t interesting and isn’t exactly an upgrade over someone who can at least do some funny stuff. The rest of the match wasn’t much better, as a lot of spots were wasted on nothing entries like Hawkins, O’Neil and Mahal. Throw in a comedy legend here or there to spice things up a bit and this is a lot better.

There were some good points here, as they went with the logical and obvious winner (not a bad thing) in Rollins and showcased a lot of young guys. Other than Black I can’t imagine any of them sticking around on the main roster but it’s nice to see them get a chance against the big names. Just….be more interesting.

Overall Rating: D+. There were parts here that worked but my goodness the length crippled this show. You could have EASILY shed an hour and a half off of this thing by dropping the Smackdown Tag Team Title match, the Smackdown Women’s Title match, and the Smackdown World Title match. Make Asuka vs. Becky (which was awesome) a big TV match and put Styles vs. Bryan on in a similar spot. Just because you can put something on the card doesn’t mean you should and that’s the big lesson here. This was almost an hour longer than last year’s way too long show because WWE refuses to hit the brakes.

There are good parts to the show but it’s the overall presentation that is severely lacking. It’s the length, it’s the lack of any surprises in the Rumbles (again: not a bad idea, but certainly not a thrilling one), it’s the lack of interesting names in the Rumble and it’s spending way too much time on stuff that doesn’t need to be on the show. I was begging for this show to be over at the halfway point and it just kept dragging along. There is no excuse for any show, including Wrestlemania, to be starting at 5 and ending at nearly midnight. That’s the big problem here and there’s very little that the wrestlers can do about it.

Results

Asuka b. Becky Lynch – Asuka Lock

Shane McMahon/The Miz b. The Bar – Shooting star press to Cesaro

Ronda Rousey b. Sasha Banks – Piper’s Pit

Becky Lynch won the Women’s Royal Rumble last eliminating Charlotte

Daniel Bryan b. AJ Styles – Pin after a chokeslam from Erick Rowan

Brock Lesnar b. Finn Balor – Kimura

Seth Rollins won the Men’s Royal Rumble last eliminating Braun Strowman

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Royal Rumble Count-Up – 2014 (2015 Redo): The Crowd Still Scares Me

Royal Rumble 2014
Date: January 26, 2014
Location: Consol Energy Center, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

The big story here is the rise of Daniel Bryan, who has gone from solid midcard guy to the people’s choice to win the Rumble. However, Batista has returned and is basically the guaranteed winner of the Rumble, no matter what the fans want to see. I can’t imagine this ends well. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Tag Team Titles: Goldust/Cody Rhodes vs. New Age Outlaws

The Outlaws reunited as a nostalgia act and pinned the champs to earn this shot. Dogg and Cody get things going with Dogg hammering away, only to miss his Shake Rattle and Roll punch. Cody misses the Disaster Kick but sends both Outlaws to the floor. The champs hit dives on the Outlaws as we take a break. Back with Goldust in trouble as Dogg puts on a chinlock.

The Outlaws double team Goldust for a bit until he hits a jumping sunset flip for two on Dogg. Gunn charges into a powerslam and there’s the hot tag to Cody. A missile dropkick drops both Outlaws and Cross Rhodes plants Dogg for two with Billy making the save. Gunn makes a blind tag and hits a Fameasser on Cody for the big upset win.

Rating: C. This was fine for an opener and the fans were into the nostalgia. The Outlaws were only transitional champions anyway as the Usos would get the belts before Wrestlemania. Cody and Goldust had them back before the year was over too so no one was really hurt by this.

The opening video talks about working to achieve your dreams. Sometimes there’s a very thin line between almost getting there and getting everything you want. We also focus on Orton vs. Cena because that’s the real main event here. The Rumble itself gets a quick mention too.

Daniel Bryan vs. Bray Wyatt

Daniel joined the Wyatt Family on the last Raw of the year but then rejected them a few weeks later, leading to one of the loudest YES chants you’ll ever hear. Bryan punches out of the corner to start but Bray drives knees into his ribs and blasts him with an elbow. That’s fine with Bryan as he kicks the knee out but has to go after Bray’s followers Luke Harper and Erick Rowan. A suicide dive drops Harper but the referee ejects both monsters.

Bray huddles with his Family on the floor, allowing Daniel to take him down with a plancha. Back in and a high cross body gets two on Wyatt but he chops Daniel off the middle rope and out to the floor. Bray charges at Daniel but drives the bad knee into the steps to put him back down again. Back in and Daniel starts kicking at the leg before snapping off a dragon screw leg whip. A modified curb stomp gets two for Bryan but Bray drives him back into the corner.

They slug it out to the apron with Wyatt snapping Daniel’s shoulder down in a big crash. Back in and Bray hits his release suplex slam and we hit the chinlock. Bray puts Daniel’s head against the post and drives in forearms to follow up on Bryan’s recent concussion. Back in again and a kick to the face gives Bray a few near falls. A big release Rock Bottom plants him again and Bray does his Spider Walk out of the corner. Bryan finally avoids an elbow drop and hits a running clothesline.

Some kicks stagger Bray and a drop toehold sends him into the middle buckle. Daniel kicks away in the corner and nails a top rope hurricanrana for two. Another running clothesline is countered by a running elbow to the chest as Bray takes over again. Bryan low bridges him to the floor and hits a running tornado DDT off the apron. A running dropkick sends Bray into the barricade and a missile dropkick puts Wyatt down in the ring.

The YES Kicks get two but Bray turns him inside out with a clothesline for two. Sister Abigail is countered but Bray bites his way out of the YES Lock. Daniel scores with more kicks and hits a top rope splash but Bray ducks to the floor to avoid the running knee. The Flying Goat is blocked though and Bray hits Sister Abigail into the barricade to knock Bryan silly. Back in and another Sister Abigail is good for the pin.

Rating: A. This was considered a match of the year contender and it’s easy to see why. These two beat the tar out of each other with each move getting harder and harder than the previous. Bryan lost here but came out looking like a star. Bray on the other hand looks like a killer and that’s exactly what he’s supposed to be.

Paul Heyman says Brock Lesnar is going to challenge the winner of Orton vs. Cena for the World Title. However, first he has to make an example out of Big Show.

Pittsburgh Steelers quarterback Ben Roethlisberger is here.

The expert panel of Jim Duggan, Shawn Michaels and Ric Flair aren’t sure who to pick between Lesnar and Big Show.

Big Show vs. Brock Lesnar

These two have had a feud for years and this time Big Show has been getting the better of it through pure power. Lesnar takes Show down before the bell and pounds on him with fists and then a chair. As Big Show is down, Lawler says Big Show gave Lesnar his first loss at the 2002 Royal Rumble, which would be three months before Lesnar debuted. We get the opening bell with Lesnar getting another chair but Show nails him with the KO Punch. Lesnar is rocked and Show takes him outside for a whip into the barricade. Back in and Big Show loads up another KO but Lesnar ducks and throws him up for the F5 for the easy pin.

Lesnar beats on him with the chair even more after the match. He’s broken two chairs over Show’s back.

Shield says they have 27 enemies tonight and it’ll be the three of them left standing. Only one of them can stand tall at the end but Reigns thinks he has the winning number. He won’t say what it is though. Dean offers to tell him his if Reigns tells his. Dean: “What if I have two numbers? I have ALL the numbers!” They agree to believe in the Shield.

Orton says he’s going to beat Cena and put him to the back of the line. Renee Young asks about Batista, Brock Lesnar and Bray Wyatt wanting title shots but Orton laughs it off and calls Wyatt a deranged hillbilly Duck Dynasty reject.

We recap Orton vs. Cena. This is more about their short term history, focusing on the titles being unified back in December. Orton seems to be cracking under the pressure of being champion and even attacked Cena’s father at Raw recently.

WWE World Title: Randy Orton vs. John Cena

No countout and no DQ with Orton defending.. The fans loudly chant for Daniel Bryan before and after the bell. They hit the mat and the fans are already bored less than twenty seconds in. Cena fights up and gets two off a bulldog but charges into an elbow in the corner. Now a Randy Savage chant starts up and Orton stops for a second before kicking Cena even more.

Off to a chinlock as the fans chant for Y2J. After fighting out, Cena catches on and tries a Boston crab. Orton kicks him to the floor during a brief Undertaker chant and now it’s just the standard boring chant. A clothesline puts Orton back outside but he sends Cena into the steps. Back in and a DDT gets two for Orton as the fans just say both guys suck. Cena comes back with shoulder blocks and the ProtoBomb, only to take too long jawing and walk into a powerslam for two.

A half nelson slam into a neckbreaker gets two for Cena but he gets caught on top. He headbutts his way out though and hits the top rope Fameasser for two. Orton counters the AA attempt into his backbreaker for two as the fans have calmed down a bit. The Elevated DDT off the apron to the floor gets two more on John. Orton’s RKO is countered into the STF but Randy is too close to the ropes. He grabs the ropes to block an AA as well but the refereee gets bumped.

There’s the STF again and Orton taps but there’s no referee. Orton uses the opportunity to nail Cena with a title belt for two. He stands around too long again though and takes an AA for two more. The RKO gets the same and now the fans want Divas. Orton misses the Punt but pulls Cena down into an STF. John counters that into a Crossface but Orton rolls into a cover for two.

Back up and Orton hits Cena with an AA, followed by Cena grabbing an RKO for another near fall. With nothing left to do, Cena loads up a middle rope AA but has to settle for a tornado DDT. The STF goes on in the middle of the ring….we’ve got Wyatts. The lights go out and come back on to reveal all three on the apron. Cena goes after them but walks into an RKO to keep the title on Orton.

Rating: B. This matchup has suffered from brand damage. We’ve seen it so many times over the years that even if the match is good, like it was here, people just do not want to see it. The guys got the crowd to calm down a bit about halfway through the match, but there’s just nothing left to see from these two. They’re both hard workers and try every time they’re out there but the interest is just gone.

The fans chant for Bryan as the Wyatts destroy Cena even more.

Tribute video to the recently passed away Mae Young.

The New Age Outlaws celebrate but tell Renee that she isn’t invited to the party.

We get some classic Rumble promos.

Miz will win because he’ll do whatever it takes to headline Wrestlemania again.

The Usos are cool with having to fight each other.

Intercontinental Champion Big E. says headlining Wrestlemania is where it’s at.

Fandango thinks he’s the only one worthy to headline the big dance.

Batista just says exactly.

Damien Sandow says it’s insane to try the same thing and expect different results. He won’t make the same mistake again.

Ryback says there are 29 superstars and one Human Wrecking Ball.

Mysterio will shock the world again.

The expert panel makes their picks. Duggan likes Ziggler, Shawn goes with Shield or Punk and Flair takes Batista.

Royal Rumble

90 second intervals with Punk at #1 (as ordered by Kane) and Seth Rollins at #2. Punk takes him into the corner to start for some shoulders to the ribs. Some kicks stagger Rollins but he comes back with a big kick of his own. A clothesline drops Rollins again but he pops back up with an enziguri. Both guys are down as Damien Sandow is in at #3. The fans loudly chant for Punk as he DDTs Sandow and drops Rollins with a neckbreaker at the same time.

The heels stomp Punk down until Cody Rhodes is in at #4. Cross Rhodes plants Sandow but Rollins stops an elimination attempt. Punk dumps Damien a few seconds later though and it’s time for Rollins to get double teamed. Kane comes in at #5 and cleans Punk’s clock. He loads up the chokeslam but Punk kicks him in the head for a surprise elimination. The debuting Alexander Rusev is in at #6.

Rusev kicks Rollins and Rhodes in the face but can’t eliminate either guy. Instead he just beats everyone up until Jack Swagger is in at #7. It’s Swagger vs. Rusev now but everyone opts to gang up on Rusev instead. Cody and Swagger break off and Kofi Kingston is in at #8. Everyone fights by the ropes until Jimmy Uso is in at #9. The announcers are noticing how fast the clock is going by.

Jimmy goes after Kofi in the corner as Rusev works on Swagger. Punk puts Rusev in a sleeper and Goldust is in at #10, giving us a group of Punk, Rollins, Goldust, Cody, Jimmy, Swagger, Kingston and Rusev. Goldust hammers away until Rusev nails him in the jaw. A group of people gang up on Rusev and dump him out, which isn’t quite a great debut for him. Kofi gets thrown out as well but Rusev catches him in mid air. He drops Kofi on the barricade and it’s time for the great return. Kingston stands up, uses the barricade as a balance beam and jumps back to the apron in a pretty cool save.

US Champion Dean Ambrose is in at #11 and goes right after Punk. Things slow down again and Dolph Ziggler is in at #12. The fans are entirely behind Dolph as the ring is getting too full. Punk has to hang onto the apron as R-Truth comes in at #13, only to be dumped in about thirty seconds by Ambrose. Rollins knocks out Jimmy and Kofi steals Swagger’s boot while literally hanging on by his feet. Jack comes over to him but gets nailed by the boot as Kofi gets back in.

Kevin Nash makes a required return at #14. He eliminates Swagger with ease and goes after Ambrose and Rollins. Punk has Ziggler dangling but Dolph gets his feet back in. Roman Reigns completes the Shield at #15, giving us Punk, Rollins, Rhodes, Kingston, Goldust, Ambrose, Ziggler, Nash and Reigns. Roman cleans house with punches and spears before launching Kofi out.

Ziggler puts Roman down with a DDT but eats a spear to cut him in half. Reigns throws Ziggler out with ease and the fans suddenly hate him. Nash gets the same treatment as Reigns now has three eliminations in less than two minutes. Great Khali is in at #16 and goes after the Shield but gets tossed by Reigns. Goldust eliminates Cody to make up for the last two years but Reigns gets rid of Goldust a second later. That leaves the Shield alone with Punk but Sheamus returns after being out six months with an injury at #17.

Sheamus cleans house and gives Dean the ten forearms followed by an Irish Curse to Rollins. Reigns eats a Brogue Kick as Miz is in at #18. Punk is just laying in the corner and making almost no effort to get back up. Miz hammers away on Reigns in the corner and Fandango is in at #19. The entire crowd starts doing his dance but Miz sends him to the apron in just a few seconds. Fandango gets back in though as Shield slowly takes over again. Reigns motions to Punk in the corner but doesn’t go after him. Punk hasn’t moved from there in at least five minutes now.

El Torito is in at #20, giving us Punk, Rollins, Ambrose, Reigns, Sheamus, Miz, Fandango and Torito. Of course the bull cleans house until Punk stands up. Punk grabs him by the head but takes a headscissors, only to have Fandango run Torito over. The referee checks on Punk as Torito dropkicks Fandango out. Reigns catches Torito with ease and dumps him out for his sixth elimination. Punk gets back up as Cesaro is in at #21. He immediately starts swinging Miz but Shield breaks up a Swing attempt on Punk. Instead Rollins gets swung a ridiculous THIRTY TIMES. Luke Harper is in at #22 as Reigns spears Cesaro down.

Rollins and Cesaro slug it out until Jey Uso is in at #23. The brawling slows down a bit now and JBL is in at #24. Cole: “The JBL character has never entered the Royal Rumble.” Good grief. JBL wears his full suit into the ring but asks Cole to go get his jacket, allowing Reigns to dump him out. Fans: “YOU STILL GOT IT!” Erick Rowan is in at #25 as JBL tries to talk about ANYTHING but being in the Rumble. Rowan kicks Miz out to clear things up a bit but everything slows back down again.

Harper tosses Jey Uso but the Wyatts turn around to see the Shield. Ryback is in at #26 and goes right for Cesaro as the fans chant Goldberg. Alberto Del Rio gets lucky #27 and things slow down yet again. Batista is in at #28 and the fans just rip him apart. He quickly dumps Rowan and has a staredown with Ryback before dumping him as well. Del Rio, the man who has been going after Batista since he returned, superkicks him down but gets lifted into the air and dumped with ease.

Intercontinental Champion Big E. is in at #29 to almost no reaction but the fans like him for suplexing Batista. The fans are chanting for Bryan and get even louder as the countdown clock comes on. The clock runs out….and it’s Rey Mysterio. To say the fans aren’t pleased with this is the understatement of the year. We’re going to pause for a second here and look at this.

First of all, Rey Mysterio is a fine choice for #30 in the Royal Rumble. He’s a multiple time World Champion, he’s held nearly every title in WWE history, he’s going to be in the Hall of Fame one day, he’s the most successful cruiserweight of all time, he’s won the Royal Rumble before and he’s one of the most popular wrestlers ever. However, he’s not the right choice for this spot.

There are two schools of thought here. The first and more prominent is that WWE just did not understand the fans and thought they would accept Batista as the big star making his return and embrace him with open arms. Then they heard the reaction and changed course to make Wrestlemania all about Daniel Bryan. The other school of thought is Bryan not being in the Rumble was planned from the beginning, they knew where they were going at Wrestlemania the entire time and the stories about Orton vs. Batista headlining the show were false rumors. I’m in the middle on that but I lean more towards the second.

Now Bryan didn’t have to win the Rumble here. You could have had a bunch of different ways to get rid of him, even down to having Kane run out and eliminate him if need be. However, he should have been in the main event. It makes sense that he at least has a chance to be in there, even if it’s just to get screwed over again.

Anyway, we have a final grouping of Punk, Rollins, Ambrose, Reigns, Sheamus, Cesaro, Harper, Batista, Langston and Mysterio. Rey hurricanranas Punk to the apron as the fans are booing the heck out of the match. Sheamus clotheslines Langston out to end his worthless Rumble. Cesaro hammers on everyone in sight and Rey hits the 619 on Rollins just to make everyone even madder. Rollins enziguris Rey out for a nice pop and we’re down to eight.

Dean and Seth put Harper on the apron but Reigns Superman Punches him out to give him eight eliminations. Ambrose tries to put out his Shield mates but Cesaro jumps he and Rollins. That’s fine with Reigns who dumps Cesaro, Rollins and Ambrose all at once to tie Kane’s record for eliminations in a single Rumble.

We’re down to four now and everyone hits a finisher. Reigns takes the GTS but Kane sneaks in to eliminate Punk. That would be Punk’s last WWE match to date. Kane goes off on Punk outside and chokeslams him through the announcers’ table. We’re down to Sheamus, Batista and Reigns but all three are down. Another Daniel Bryan chant starts up as Batista takes over, turning it into a NO chant.

Sheamus cleans house and points at the sign before loading up a Brogue Kick. He misses Batista though and gets backdropped to the apron. Reigns elbows Sheamus out to set a new Rumble record for eliminations with twelve. That leaves Reigns vs. Batista and all of a sudden everyone is a Reigns fan. Reigns wins a slugout and clotheslines Batista down as the people chant for Roman. Batista comes back with his own horrible spear, only to have Reigns show him how it’s done….and then get thrown out a few seconds later to send Batista to Wrestlemania.

Rating: D. This just wasn’t a very good Rumble though its moments. Batista came in at the wrong time and it killed any kind of comeback he could have had. The fans did not want to see what the company was offering them at this point and they let them know about it. In their defense though, this Rumble was kind of awful. The comedy and returns felt forced, Rusev’s debut went nowhere and they might as well have given it to Batista and put on an hour of Mighty Mouse cartoons to save everyone’s time. It’s not a good match but the crowd reaction is certainly interesting.

Batista is booed out of the building as we see a highlight package ends the show.

Overall Rating: D+. The Rumble really hurts this show as it drags down two good matches and an entertaining Lesnar squash. The problem is that’s the lasting memory of this show: the fans booing the heck out of Batista as WWE seemed to think he was exactly what WWE wanted. The show isn’t horrible but it leaves a really bad taste in your mouth.

Ratings Comparison

New Age Outlaws vs. Goldust/Cody Rhodes

Original: C

Redo: C

Daniel Bryan vs. Bray Wyatt

Original:A

Redo: A

Brock Lesnar vs. Big Show

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

John Cena vs. Randy Orton

Original:B

Redo: B

Royal Rumble

Original:B

Redo: D

Overall Rating

Original:A

Redo: D+

Hokey smoke that’s quite the drop.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2014/01/26/royal-rumble-2014-the-night-the-crowd-died/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs




Royal Rumble Count-Up – 2014 (Original): They Say No

Royal Rumble 2014
Date: January 26, 2014
Location: Consol Energy Center, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

Tonight marks the official start of the Road to Wrestlemania. We’re ten weeks away from the biggest show of the year and barring some surprising changes, the main event will be set in place tonight. The odds on favorite for the Rumble would seem to be Batista, but for the life of me I can’t imagine anyone but Daniel Bryan winning it. He isn’t entered yet, but there are about ten slots left open. Give him a late number and listen to the roof blow off the place. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Tag Titles: New Age Outlaws vs. Cody Rhodes/Goldust

Cody and Goldust are defending and lost a non-title match to the Outlaws to set this up. Road Dogg starts with Cody and is taken down by a quick shoulder block. Back up and Roadie hits his shaky fist but has to duck the Disaster Kick. Gunn comes in off the tag but is quickly sent to the floor for a top rope clothesline as we take a break. Back with Road Dogg dropping a knee on Goldust for two and putting on a chinlock.

Goldust fights back up and a double clothesline puts both guys down. Billy breaks up a tag attempt as the announcers brag about how Gunn hasn’t aged a bit since the 90s. For 50 years old the guys is in good shape. Goldust finally makes the hot tag and Cody speeds things up, including a double springboard missile dropkick to put both Outlaws down. Cross Rhodes lays out Road Dogg but Billy saves at two. Billy comes in off a blind tag as Cody hits the Disaster Kick to Roadie, setting up the Fameasser for the pin and the titles at 6:30.

Rating: C. I was surprised here. Not only was this not the result I was expecting, but the match was better than I thought it was going to be. The Brothers had been on one heck of a roll since the fall, but this likely leads into the Authority being corrupt storyline. That doesn’t make sense given that the Outlaws just won the match clean, but I’m assuming that’s the idea.

The opening video focuses on a countdown and how the Road to Wrestlemania begins tonight.

We recap Daniel Bryan vs. Bray Wyatt. Daniel joined the Wyatt Family a few weeks ago but only lasted two weeks in the group before turning on Bray in the huge face turn, despite him barely ever being a heel. Tonight is the showdown we’ve been waiting for.

Daniel Bryan vs. Bray Wyatt

The Family is with Bray here, despite the idea of the match being that they’re not supposed to be here. Daniel fires off kicks to the leg and takes Bray down with a running knee but Bray gets in a shot of his own to take over. The Wyatts get in a few blows of their own and are ejected, with Bray saying he doesn’t need them to fight this war. Back in and Daniel gets in some kicks to the leg and a high cross body for two, only to be sent to the floor. Bray misses a charge into the steps and injures his knee again, giving Bryan the opening he’s been needing.

Daniel hooks something resembling an Indian Deathlock before stomping Bray’s face into the mat for two. They slug it out on the apron with the fans chanting YES/NO in time. Bray headbutts Daniel to stagger him and wrings his arm down onto the apron to take over. Back in and Bray is in serious mode now. We hit the chinlock but Daniel quickly fights up with forearms, only to be backdropped to the floor.

The annoying fans chant Jerry Lawler as Bray rams Daniel’s head into the post and drives in forearms for good measure. A running senton backsplash has Daniel in even more trouble and Bray asks the fans why they don’t help him. Bray catapults Daniel throat first into the ropes and we hit another chinlock. Wyatt does his spider walk out of the corner and the announcers of course laugh at Linda Blair jokes. He stays on Daniel’s neck with another chinlock but Daniel gets in a shot to the head and shakes the ropes before firing off even more strikes.

A drop toehold sends Bray into the middle buckle and there are the YES Kicks to the chest and leg. Daniel hooks a hurricanrana from the middle rope to send the big man flying but he’s out at two. Now the fans are into it by saying this is awesome and there’s the moonsault in the corner. Daniel loads up the clothesline but thankfully Bray knows what’s coming and hits a running elbow to stop Bryan’s comeback.

Bray misses a charge and falls to the floor, allowing Bryan to hit a running tornado DDT off the apron. Awesome looking move. There’s the running dropkick to knock Bray into the barricade and the missile dropkick puts him down back inside. Now the real YES Kicks have Bray in even more trouble as the fans are going nuts. The big kick to the head gets two and Daniel loads up the running dropkicks in the corner but Bray clotheslines him inside out for a very near fall.

Sister Abigail is countered into a rollup for two and there’s the YES Lock but Bray bites the hand for the break. Bray’s superplex is countered with headbutts and Daniel hits a top rope splash to crush Wyatt. Daniel loads up the running knee but Bray bails to the floor. Bryan dives at him with the FLYING GOAT but Bray catches him in midair and hits a wicked Sister Abigail into the barricade. Sister Abigail connects for the pin at 21:37.

Rating: A. Well that was awesome. This was a good example of a match where both guys could look great and only one could win. Daniel losing here isn’t a bad thing as he could still come back later and win the Rumble to make up for this. Both guys look better coming out of this and Bray was the one that needed the win more. As soon as he loses, a lot of his mystique is gone. Outstanding match here and something Bray needed.

The expert panel (HBK, Flair, Duggan) are impressed. Shawn seems fine after his fight with Bryan a few weeks ago.

Paul Heyman says Brock wants a title shot and talks about how great Big Show is. It doesn’t matter though as Brock is going to destroy him and then take over the WWE.

We recap Big Show vs. Brock Lesnar. Show doesn’t like Lesnar and is tired of him being a bully so tonight he’s standing up to him. He also stuffed a Lesnar takedown attempt on Raw earlier this week to show how strong he was.

Brock Lesnar vs. Big Show

For once this is under regular rules. Brock takes him down before the bell like an MMA fight and just mauls Big Show before blasting him over and over with a chair. More chair shots put Show on the mat as Jerry butchers history, saying Big Show gave Brock his first loss at the 2002 Royal Rumble (it was the 2002 Survivor Series). Show is beaten down even more with chair shot after chair shot. The bell still hasn’t rung.

The referee runs from Brock and Big Show says ring the bell. Brock comes at him with the chair but walks into the KO Punch which knocks Lesnar silly. He rolls to the floor and Big Show throws him around with ease. Back in and Brock ducks another KO Punch and gets caught in the F5. Lesnar WALKS AROUND WITH BIG SHOW ON HIS SHOULDERS and hits the biggest F5 you’ll ever see, making it more like an AA, for the pin at 2:05.

Post match Brock destroys him with even more chair shots, each one louder than the last. He bends two chairs over Show’s back so he goes to get a third and beats on Show’s leg. Show is left in a heap after what was much more of a segment than a match.

The Shield won’t tell each other their numbers. Rollins says the only number that matters is three.

Randy Orton says he’ll beat John Cena tonight and send him to the back of the line. Renee Young mentions Batista, Brock Lesnar and Bray Wyatt wanting title shots. Orton: “Bray Wyatt? He’s a Duck Dynasty reject.” The crowd laughs as Orton says it’s not John Cena’s night.

We get a LONG recap of John Cena vs. Randy Orton. Randy beat him at TLC for the Undisputed Title in a TLC match but tonight it’s one fall with no stipulations. On top of that Orton attacked Cena’s father a few weeks ago on Raw to make it personal.

WWE Title: Randy Orton vs. John Cena

We’re ready to go after the big match intros. The fans chant for Daniel Bryan and then that the match is boring. Cena takes him down with a headscissors and the chant shifts to the usual dueling Cena chants. Orton grabs a headlock and suplexes Cena down as the chants go to WE WANT ANGLE and Randy Savage. There’s a Y2J chant…..AND CENA TRIES FOR A LIONTAMER! It shifts the chants to Undertaker as Orton suplexes Cena back inside for two.

The fans think it’s boring as we’re in a chinlock less than five minutes into the match. They head outside with Cena being sent into the steps as the crowd is restless again. Back to the Bryan chant and Orton actually shouts that he’s the champion and not Bryan. A nice DDT puts Cena down for two and the fans think both guys suck. Cena comes back with an electric chair for two and the shoulder blocks followed by the ProtoBomb. Orton counters the Shuffle with the powerslam but Cena comes back with his half nelson slam into a neckbreaker for two of his own.

Cena loads up the top rope Fameasser but first has to block a superplex attempt before connecting for two. Orton throws him to the apron but Cena backdrops him to the floor to counter the Elevated DDT. The crowd has calmed down a bit now. Orton comes right back with the Elevated DDT on the floor and holds a finger to his ear for the crowd. Back inside and the RKO is countered into the STF as the crowd just does not care, probably because they know a title match isn’t ending less than fifteen minutes in.

Randy crawls over to the rope and gets in a shot to the head for a breather on the floor. Back in and Cena grabs another ProtoBomb followed by the Shuffle but Orton grabs the rope to block the AA. The referee gets bumped and there’s the STF, making Randy tap but there’s no referee. Randy hits him in the face with the belt for two as the doctor revives the referee.

The fans think this is awful as an AA gets two for John. An RKO gets the same and the fans still don’t buy that the match is ending yet. Orton poses as the fans say they want Divas. With nothing else to do, Orton puts Cena in the STF but Cena is quickly out and has Orton in a Crossface. That’s countered into a rollup for two and Orton hits an AA (done more like Cena used to do it without going down) for two more.

Cena of course hits an RKO for two of his own before loading up the middle rope AA, only to have Orton get free pretty quickly. A tornado DDT puts Orton down and sets up the STF in the middle of the ring….and cue the Wyatts. Cena chases them off but walks into the RKO for the pin at 20:53. Orton was surprised by the Wyatts being there.

Rating: B. The worst part about the crowd: the match was good. Trading finishers was something new for these guys, which is impressive as they’ve had about a dozen matches on PPV alone. The Wyatts interfering would seem to set up Cena vs. Wyatt at Mania, which is interesting to say the least. Good stuff here, as the show continues to rock.

Cena is destroyed as Orton bails. Bray hits Sister Abigail after shouting BEHOLD THE CREATORS OF THE NEW WORLD.

The New Age Outlaws tell Renee Young to put some more onto their intro. We look at the end of the preshow match and it’s a new record for longest time between title reigns at 14 years. They have two words for Renee: new champs.

We even get old school Rumble promos!

Miz will do whatever it takes to headline Wrestlemania again.

The Usos say only one can win and go to Wrestlemania.

Langston is ready.

Fandango wants to go to the Big Dance.

Batista: “Exactly.”

Sandow says insanity means trying the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. He won’t make them again.

Ryback says his unlimited energy takes him to Wrestlemania.

Rey Mysterio says he’ll shock the world again.

Back to the expert panel. Shawn picks Shield or Punk. Flair picks Batista. Duggan picks…..Dolph Ziggler?

Royal Rumble

90 second entrants this year and it’s Punk at #1 and Rollins at #2. Punk takes him back into the corner to start but Rollins puts him onto the top, only to be elbowed in the head. Punk comes back with strikes but Rollins just punches him into the face. A kick to Seth’s ribs slows him down but he avoids a big kick to the face and hits a running dropkick. There’s a running forearm in the corner but Punk comes back with the running knee. He calls for the GTS but gets caught by an enziguri. Punk kicks him in the face and both guys are down as Damien Sandow is in at #3.

Sandow goes right for Punk as Rollins gets a breather. Punk gets double teamed but comes back with a neckbreaker to Rollins/DDT to Sandow combo to put both guys down. He tries to throw Rollins out but Sandow breaks it up. Cody Rhodes is in at #4, meaning people from earlier in the night can be in as well. He hits a quick Cross Rhodes on Damien but Seth prevents an elimination. Sandow charges at Punk and is backdropped out to get us back to three.

Rollins gets double teamed but Kane is #5, wrestling in black dress pants. He goes right after Punk and stomps him down in the corner before hitting a nice side slam. Punk blocks the chokeslam with a high kick and throws Kane out with relative ease. Alexander Rusev, a Bulgarian monster from NXT, is in at #6. He immediately starts cleaning house but only throws Cody and Rollins to the apron. Alexander picks up Punk and throws him around with a fallaway slam and it’s Jack Swagger at #7.

Jack charges to the ring and hits a quick Vader Bomb on Rollins and Cody as the ring is filling up a bit. We get a showdown between Rusev and Swagger and the fans chant USA. Rusev takes over with a clothesline and a charge in the corner but Rollins takes Alexander’s leg out and it’s a triple team with everyone not named Punk stomping the Bulgarian. The fans are WAY into this.

Kofi Kingston is in at #8 and you can feel the big save coming. He rolls into the ring and immediately punches Punk down but can’t throw him out. Cody hits the Disaster Kick on Swagger as Kofi goes after Rusev, who he’s been feuding with in NXT. Swagger has Rollins upside down in the corner but can’t get him out. Jimmy Uso is in at #9 and hits a quick Bubba Bomb on Rollins and gets in shots on everyone else. Punk headbutts Jimmy and we get some good old fashioned racial sterotypes as it has no effect.

Goldust is in at #10, giving us a group of Punk, Rollins, Rhodes, Kingston, Rusev, Swagger and Uso. He takes Rollins down with some right hands and hits the kneeling uppercut on Jimmy. Rusev punches the paint off Goldie’s face to stop his momentum and eveyrone gangs up on Alexander again. We need some eliminations here. A big group of about five people get Rusev out in a showing that could have gone longer.

Kofi is knocked to the apron and into Rusev’s arms, so he lays him on the barricade and drives knees into Kingston’s back. Kofi stands up on the barricade and tightropes across before jumping ALL THE WAY BACK TO THE APRON in an incredible athletic display. Ambrose (coming through the entrance) is in at #11. He goes right for Kofi and then Punk as Swagger is in big trouble but gets back inside. Things slow down a bit as Goldust slides back in under the ropes. Dolph Ziggler returns at #12.

Ziggler speeds things up by pounding on everyone but is put on the apron in just a few seconds. The ring is really getting full as we need a monster to clear it out. Instead we get R-Truth at #13 but is double teamed by the two Shield members. They toss him to the apron and Ambrose kicks him out with ease. Jimmy goes up but gets kicked in the head, allowing Ambrose to shove him out as well. Kofi is on the apron but has to block a boot from Swagger. He holds onto it so long that he’s literally hanging in by his feet and pulls Jack’s boot off.

Kevin Nash of all people is in at #14, giving us a group of Punk, Rollins, Nash, Ziggler, Ambrose, Goldust, Swagger, Rhodes and Kingston. Nash puts out Swagger as soon as he gets in but has to deal with Shield. Things slow down again and it’s Roman Reigns in at #15 to put the entire Shield in the match. There’s a spear to Cody and a headbutt to Nash’s chest. Roman catches Trouble in Paradise and throws Kofi out but shrugs off the Zig Zag and hits a GREAT spear on Ziggler for a quick elimination.

Nash is low bridged out by Reigns as well as the ring is rapidly emptying out. Goldust and Cody go after Reigns but Rollins makes a save. Great Khali is in at #16 and Shield is on him as he comes in. The giant shoves all of them down but a Superman Punch knocks him into the ropes, allowing all three of them to put Khali out. Goldust, Punk and Rhodes pair off with the three guys but Cody is sent to the floor, only to be accidentally knocked out by his brother. Reigns dumps Goldust and we’re down to Punk vs. Shield.

Things even up a lot as Sheamus returns at #17. Shield is right on him but the pale one fights them off and gets them all in different corners. There are the ten forearms to Ambrose’s chest with the last one being to the exposed chest. An Irish Curse puts Rollins down and a Brogue Kick knocks Reigns silly. Sheamus stands tall but Reigns is dead weight. Rollins and Ambrose double team Sheamus and it’s Miz at #18, giving us Shield, Punk, Sheamus and Miz.

Everyone pairs off again but they all wind up in one corner. Punk has been down for a long time now but is likely just getting a breather. The clock is going very fast tonight as Fandango is in at #19. Shield swarms Sheamus as Fandango goes after Miz. Punk is still down in the corner. The fans want Daniel Bryan but get El Torito at #20. As in the little guy in the white bull costume.

Naturally he beats up a few guys but Punk gives him a look that channels Miz by saying “really?” Punk grabs him by the head but gets caught in a freaking hurricanrana. Fandango runs him over (JBL: “PETA is going to be mad. I head Mantaur is his grandfather.”) but gets hurricanranaed to the apron and dropkicked out by the bull. Torito dives on Reigns like an idiot though and is LAUNCHED onto Fandango for his sixth elimination. We’re back to Miz, Sheamus and Punk vs. Shield.

Cesaro is in at #21 and picks Miz up for a quick Cesaro Swing. Punk gets one as well but Rollins and Ambrose break it up. Cesaro rams them into each other and swings Rollins until it’s Luke Harper at #22. Reigns spears Cesaro down as things slow again. Rollins and Cesaro slug it out and Jey Uso is in at #23, giving us Shield, Sheamus, Miz, Jey, Punk, Cesaro and Harper. Speaking of Cesaro and Harper, they have a big power slugout with Harper kicking Cesaro’s head off to take over.

JBL of all people is in at #24 to a BIG pop and comes in wearing a full suit and tie. He yells at Cole to come take his coat, allowing Reigns to throw him out with ease. That’s #7 for Reigns. Erick Rowan is in at #25 and teams up with Harper to dump Miz, leaving us Shield, the Wyatt Family, Miz, Punk, Sheamus, Cesaro and Jey Uso. Jey is kicked out by Harper and Shield stares down the Wyatts as Ryback is in at #26. Everyone brawls and Alberto Del Rio is #27.

Nothing much happens until Batista is in for the big cleanup spot at #28. He’s in very short shorts instead of trunks but still looks good. He clotheslines Rowan out and it’s showdown time with Ryback. They slug it out and Cesaro has to dive out of the way of a launched Batista. Ryback is backdropped out by Big Dave but Del Rio clips Batista and kicks him in the head. Batista easily picks Alberto up and tosses him out though, right before Big E. Langston is in at #29.

Langston starts with a nice belly to belly on Batista and a series of backbreakers to Sheamus. The fans start chanting YES as the clock is ticking down. #30 is…….Rey Mysterio, completely letting the air out of the arena. The final group is Punk, Shield, Harper, Sheamus, Cesaro, Mysteiro, Langston and Batista. Rey and Rollins try to eliminate each other but neither go out. Sheamus knocks out Langston to get us down to ten but the fans just do not care now.

Rollins tosses Mysterio to a pop because he’s not who the fans wanted to see. Rollins and Ambrose stomp Sheamus down in the corner and get Harper to the apron but Reigns Superman Punches him out. Ambrose tries to get rid of Reigns but can’t quite do it, triggering an argument. Cesaro goes after both of them so Reigns dumps Cesaro, Rollins and Ambrose, which ties Kane’s record of eleven. His reward is a spinebuster as we’re down to four: Punk, Batista, Sheamus and Reigns.

Make that three as Kane comes in and pulls Punk out before chokeslamming him through the table. The final three are Reigns, Batista and Sheamus who are all down as the fans chant for Mysterio. Everyone slowly gets back up and the fans boo this out of the building. This would be Sheamus’ third straight final three by the way. Batista breaks up a spear to Sheamus as the NO chants begin. Sheamus rewards him with the Regal Roll but Batista ducks the Brogue Kick.

A backdrop puts Sheamus on the apron and Reigns dumps him for the record at 12 eliminations. Batista thinks he dumps Reigns but Roman slides back in as we’re down to two. Roman unzips the vest and stares Batista down as the fans are somewhat into this. They slug it out with Reigns taking over but Batista comes back with a spear. The fans are COMPLETELY behind Reigns here as he spears Batista right back. He’s all fired up….but Batista easily throws him out for the win at 55:10, letting the air out of the arena again.

Rating: B. It was a really good Rumble, but man alive if that crowd reaction doesn’t change something, nothing is going to. I’ve been watching wrestling my entire life and I have never ever heard a crowd just go silent like they did when Mysterio came out. I mean they just DIED. Batista was destined to win this thing, even though he was the completely wrong pick. Reigns looks like a STAR here but needed the win to cement it. Batista just was not the right pick here, but you knew it was coming the entire time.

The fans are not pleased as a lot of fireworks go off to end the show.

Overall Rating: A. Very ticked off crowd to say the least, this was an outstanding show. Everything was either good to excellent with only the world title match being a step below the rest. Raw tomorrow night is going to be VERY interesting as they’re either going to change a lot of stuff or have the worst crowd reaction to a Wrestlemania of all time. I had an awesome night with this show, but Batista should not have gotten that win, period.

I’ll have more in depth thoughts and analysis on the Rumble tomorrow after it’s had a better chance to process.

Results

Bray Wyatt b. Daniel Bryan – Sister Abigail

Brock Lesnar b. Big Show – F5

Randy Orton b. John Cena – RKO

Batista won the Royal Rumble, last eliminating Roman Reigns

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Royal Rumble Count-Up – 2013 (2014 Redo): One More Time

Royal Rumble 2013
Date: January 27, 2013
Location: US Airways Center, Phoenix, Arizona
Attendance: 13,00
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

This show was only a year ago and I can barely remember anything about it. Aside from the Rumble the big matches are the Rock challenging CM Punk for the WWE Title in the most obvious ending ever and Alberto Del Rio defending his newly won World Heavyweight Championship against Big Show in a last man standing match. Other than that we’ve only got HELL NO vs. the Rhodes Scholars to complete the card. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: US Title: The Miz vs. Antonio Cesaro

Cesaro is defending. This is just after Flair passed the Figure Four to Miz, starting the worst period of his career. Miz grabs a headlock to start and gets two off an elbow to the jaw. The headlock takes Cesaro down to the mat but he fights up and grabs one of his own. Back up and Miz tries a leapfrog but gets caught in midair with a tikt-a-whirl backbreaker for two. The champion takes over and cranks on both of Miz’s arms before getting two off a Michinoku Driver.

A hard European uppercut sets up the gutwrench suplex for two and it’s back to the double arm. Back up again and Miz slips out of a slam and hooks the Reality Check for two. There’s the running clothesline in the corner and Miz goes up but hurts his knee on the top rope ax handle. Cesaro gets caught with his feet on the ropes, allowing Miz to get two off a rollup. Antonio misses a running knee in the corner but is still able to roll away from the Figure Four. Cesar takes him to the floor and rams Miz into the metal underneath the ring. Miz is out cold so Cesaro Neutralizes him for the pin to retain.

Rating: D+. Miz just doesn’t work in a lot of these matches and the Figure Four doesn’t work in the slightest. Thankfully he wouldn’t be featured very prominently for awhile as there was just nothing to him for the most part. Cesaro still needs to get a push as he’s more talented and marketable than half the roster but instead we get people like Miz.

The opening video is about time passing and how no one has enough. This ties into Punk’s time as champion with Rock saying the reign ends tonight.

Smackdown World Title: Big Show vs. Alberto Del Rio

Last man standing match, which is a rematch with the same stipulations from when Alberto won the title a few weeks ago. Del Rio turned the announce table on top of Big Show so Big Show turned it on top of him a few weeks later. Alberto is shown in the back and he runs into Bret Hart for no apparent reason whatsoever. Bret says Alberto reminds him of a Mexican version of himself. Alberto calls Bret a Canadian Del Rio and Ricardo gushes, earning him Bret’s sunglasses. What a bizarre cameo.

Some hard chops have Del Rio in early trouble and a slam gets a five count. Alberto chops away but jumps off the middle rope right into a chop to change control right back. The champion dropkicks the giant’s knee out but the low superkick actually knocks Big Show up from his knees to his feet. A hurricanrana and a seated senton put Big Show down and Alberto gets a breather. It’s amazing how much more intersting Del Rio is by doing this lucha stuff instead of his arm work. The arm stuff is good but this is such a nice change of pace.

Big Show blocks the armbreaker with one arm and slams Del Rio down, sending him outside. Del Rio gets back in as Big Show gets a chair but the champion dropkicks him in the ribs to knock it out of his hands. A series of chair shots (crowd: “SI! SI! SI!”) has Big Show down but Alberto dives into a chokeslam for an eight count. We head outside again with Del Rio getting chopped to the floor with ease. This is a very slow paced match so far.

A pair of low blows puts Big Show down in the aisle but he’s up at nine. Show hits something resembling a DDT on the floor before sending Del Rio into the set. He rips a piece of the set, resembling a light tube, and blasts Del Rio over the back. Since this is WWE there’s a table readily available and Big Show takes the champion on top of the set for a chokeslam through the table. The bump looked awesome but he’s again on his feet at nine.

The beating takes Del Rio back to the ring and Show loads up the WMD. Alberto sees it coming and rolls outside, only to have Big Show throw Ricardo around for fun. Big Show misses a charge through the barricade (clearly heavily padded) for five but a long series of chair shots has him down again. Del Rio crushes the arm between the steps and a chair, but Alberto follows up with a fire extinguisher blast to the face for no apparent reason. Back in and the armbreaker goes on, but Ricardo ups the ante by duct taping Big Show’s legs to the ropes. The giant can’t get up and Alberto retains the title.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t the worst match in the world but it was very slowly paced and the ending made Del Rio look more clever than tough. It also doesn’t help that the match was the same gimmick they did less than a month ago. Face Alberto was a nice guy but they cut the cord just six months after this. Not bad, but Del Rio winning the title here would have been much better.

Send Slim Jims to the military!

Ziggler isn’t worried about being in the Rumble and AJ threatens Matt Striker with Big E. Langston for implying Ziggler can’t win. Langston does one of the most mind blowing imitations of an annoying reporter while asking Ziggler for his thoughts on the main event. Dolph has little of note to say but no one was hearing him after Big E.’s bit anyway.

Cesaro says he’ll continue the streak of non-Americans winning the Rumble.

The Prime Time Players……WE’RE GETTING RUMBLE PROMOS!!!! Anyway they say anyone that thinks they’ll eliminate either of them is getting a penalty flag.

Orton says he’s perfect for the Rumble because it’s every man for himself.

Cena is ready for the Rumble because it means he can be champion again.

Intercontinental Champion Wade Barrett says he’ll restore credability to the Rumble.

Sheamus says he won the Rumble last year and he’ll do it again tonight.

Ryback isn’t any catchphrase and he doesn’t eat Fruity Pebbles, but he’ll see food every 90 seconds. Feed him more.

We recap Miz vs. Cesaro on the pre-show.

Tag Titles: HELL NO vs. Rhodes Scholars

The Scholars are challenging. Cody kicks Bryan in the ribs as Cole references Queen lyrics. Bryan spins out of a wristlock and the fans chant for Cody’s mustache. Cody’s leapfrog is countered into a surfboard and it’s off to Kane for a low dropkick and a two count. Rhodes scores with a dropkick of his own and drives Kane into the corner for the tag off to Sandow. Kane easily powers Sandow into the corner because, you know, he’s Damien Sandow and it’s off to Bryan for the YES Kicks.

JBL rants about Cole and Lawler hugging as Kane kicks Sandow in the face, knocking him out to the floor. The FLYING GOAT takes out the challengers but Cody low bridges Bryan to the floor to take over. Back in and a half crab has Daniel in trouble but he reverses into a small package to escape. Damien comes in again and drops an elbow for two before dropping the Wind-Up Elbow.

After some knees to the back it’s Cody in again but he charges into a boot in the corner. Sandow breaks up a hot tag attempt and Cody puts Bryan in an over the shoulder backbreaker. Daniel slides down to escape and makes the tag to Kane. Sandow is tossed around like a rag doll but a Cody distraction prevents the top rope clothesline. Kane grabs both guys by the throat and Bryan tags himself in. The Scholars double suplex Kane but Bryan shoves Cody into a chokeslam and Daniel YES Locks Sandow to retain.

Rating: C. Nothing you wouldn’t see on Raw around this time which means it was fine. The Scholars were a nice idea for a team but it was clear that they had no chance at this point given how low their individual stocks were. Kane and Bryan gelled perfectly well as a team and Bryan would get far bigger very soon.

Rumble By The Numbers which I’ve typed many times already.

HELL NO celebrates in the back when Vickie Guerrero comes up and gives them their Rumble numbers. Daniel shows Kane his but Kane won’t show Bryan.

We look at the Royal Rumble Fan Fest which is another name for Axxess. This included a tournament of NXT wrestlers for a spot in the Rumble, won by Bo Dallas.

Royal Rumble

Ziggler is #1 which he picked (the other option was #2) after winning a Beat the Clock Challenge on Raw. Dolph says he’ll win and doesn’t care who he faces first, bringing out a returning Chris Jericho at #2. This was a complete shock and the roof is blown off the building. Also remember that Ziggler beat Jericho to send him out of the company to give us some history. The clock is at 90 seconds between entrants this year.

Jericho is quickly sent to the apron but comes back with a top rope ax handle. Now it’s Dolph on the apron as the fans tell Jericho he still has it. When did Jericho ever come close to losing it? A superplex brings Ziggler back into the ring and Cody Rhodes is in at #3. Jericho hammers away on him but Ziggler gets in a cheap shot as the double teaming begins. Chris knocks Ziggler down and puts Cody in the Walls but Dolph makes the save.

Dolph catapults Jericho throat first into the bottom rope as Kofi Kingston is in at #4. Kofi immediately speeds things up and pounds away on Cody but can’t hit Ziggy with Trouble in Paradise. Ziggler is thrown to the apron and all four guys try to eliminate each other at the same time in the same spot. Santino Marella is #5 and he sends all four to the apron before loading up the Cobra. Everybody is back in and even though Santino takes Kofi down with the sock, it’s Cody backdropping Marella out.

Drew McIntyre of 3MB is #6 and gets to fight Kofi as everyone else takes a breather. Back up and it’s time to lay on the ropes while trying to eliminate people. Jericho is sent over the ropes but he keeps his feet off the ground and gets back in. Titus O’Neil is in at #7 to add some power, including taking Cody and Kofi down with a double clothesline. Cole finally tells us that the bark is a shout out to his fraternity from Florida. Thank you for explaining that to us after two years.

Jericho throws out McIntyre but can’t do the same to Ziggler as Goldust is #8. Cody gets ready for the showdown and the fans are WAY into this. They trade the kneeling uppercuts and Goldie stomps on Cody for a bit. The fans chant for Goldust and it’s David Otunga (remember him?) is in at #9. The announcers ignore the match to talk about the commentators being in the Rumble last year as people start to pair off.

Nothing much happens until Heath Slater is in at #10. That gives us Ziggler, Jericho, Rhodes, Kingston, O’Neil, Goldust, Otunga and Slater at the moment. Slater fires off right hands to Kofi as Jericho calls spots to Ziggler. Dolph gets stuck on the apron again and Sheamus is #11 to clear out some bodies. He destroys everyone with his usual stuff before sending Titus to the apron for the ten forearms. Otunga is thrown onto Titus to get rid of O’Neil before ten forearms and a Brogue Kick get rid of the lawyer. Tensai, still the Japanese lunkhead, is #12.

Everybody goes after Tensai to make a big cluster in the corner. That goes nowhere at all so Brodus Clay comes in at #13. We get a Tons of Funk preview before Goldust backdrops Cody to the apron, only to get pulled to the apron as well. Cody gets back in and sends Goldust into the post for the elimination and a lot of booing. Rey Mysterio is #14 to make the crowd happy again. Ziggler and Jericho get quick 619s and the top rope splash crushes Jericho. Things slow down a bit until we reach the halfway point with Darren Young at #15.

A bunch of guys join forces to dump Brodus and Kofi puts out Tensai a few seconds later. Now we get to the part that everybody was waiting on as Kofi is knocked off the apron, only to land on Tensai’s back. He jumps onto the announcers’ table as he tries to figure this out. Why he doesn’t just jump two feet to get onto the steps is beyond me. Bo Dallas is #16 as this is going on. Instead of the steps, Kofi gets JBL’s office chair and pogos his way back to the ring. Kingston pulls Darren out of the ring but gets caught with the Disaster Kick for the elimination before he can get back inside.

Godfather gives us the nostalgia pop at #17 and is dropkicked out by Ziggler four seconds later. He seems ok with that and leaves with his women. The whole point was the entrance anyway so I have no issue with that. Wade Barrett is in at #18 as the ring is getting too full. Everything slows down again and John Cena is #19 to clear out some tired people. Everybody gets ready for him so Cena comes a charging. John fights them all off and throws out Slater and Cody but can’t dump Jericho.

Damien Sandow is #20, giving us Ziggler, Jericho, Sheamus, Mysterio, Dallas, Barrett, Cena and Sandow. Mysteiro and Barrett fight to the apron and a big forearm puts Rey out. Sheamus goes right after Wade as Jericho tries to put Cena in the Walls. Daniel Bryan is #21 and fires off kicks to Sandow. Now it’s Barrett getting the kicks as everyone else is down. Sheamus and Bryan try to put Jericho out but he slides back in under the ropes.

Antonio Cesaro is in at #22 and gets in a fight with Sheamus as the fans start the dueling Cena chants. Everybody is back up now and Great Khali is #23. It’s chops all around until things calm a bit. Kane comes in at #24 to fire things up again (get it?) but the ring is too full. It gets even worse with Zach Ryder coming in at #25 but HELL NO dumps Khali. Bryan dumps Kane but Cesaro dumps Bryan into Kane’s arms. Daniel: YES! Kane shouts no and drops Bryan for the elimination in a funny bit.

Randy Orton is #26 and it’s powerslams all around. Ziggler and Dallas get a double Elevated DDT and it’s an RKO for Ryder, followed by the elimination. Jinder Mahal gets lucky #27 as Cesaro lifts Cena up, only to be eliminated himself. Ziggler gets launched to the ropes but slides back in as Miz is #28. He gets in a fight with Cesaro in the aisle and limps into the ring to sell the ankle injury from earlier. Sheamus dumps Mahal and Sin Cara is #29.

Cara tries an enziguri on Ziggler which misses by four inches but Ziggler sells it anyway. Bo Dallas pulls Barrett out in an elimination that should have led further than it did. Miz sends Jericho to the apron as Barrett pulls Dallas out from the floor. Ryback is #30 to give us a final grouping of Ryback, Ziggler, Jericho, Sheamus, Cena, Sandow, Orton, Miz and Sin Cara. Damien is out first and Sin Cara quickly follows. Miz tries to power Ryback out and is tossed as well to get us down to six. Jericho is somehow still alive and hits a Lionsault on Cena but the springboard dropkick doesn’t eliminate Sheamus.

Ziggler backdrops Jericho to the apron and superkicks him out (missed as well but he’s spent at this point) but walks into an RKO. There’s one for Cena as well and Sheamus gets the third. That leaves Ryback to fight Orton but the monster gets taken down with an Elevated DDT. Ryback fights off the RKO and clotheslines Randy out to get us down to four. Ziggler DDTs Cena down but a Brogue Kick puts Dolph on the floor.

It’s Sheamus, Ryback and Cena with Ryback getting double suplexed down. Cena and Sheamus make things serious by LOOKING AT THE SIGN. John takes over but Ryback runs him over with a clothesline. Sheamus escapes the Shell Shock, looks at the sign, and hits White Noise on Ryback. The Brogue Kick is countered with a backdrop to eliminate Sheamus and we’re down to two.

They LOOK AT THE SIGN and do their signature taunts before Ryback spinebusters Cena down. The Meathook is countered into the STF and Ryback passes out, leaving him as dead weight. Ryback fights out of the corner and Cena’s head into the mat. He loads up a powerslam but Cena slips out the back and shoves Ryback out for the win and title shot at Wrestlemania.

Rating: B. It’s a good but not great Rumble. That being said, there was almost no other option to win here, even though it set up the rematch that no one wanted to see. There’s certainly some good stuff in it and there were no down spots, but you would expect more big moments than we got here.

Coming Home ad for Wrestlemania. That still should have been Wrestlemania XXX.

We recap CM Punk vs. The Rock. It’s a basic story: Punk has been champion for 434 days and Rock is getting a title shot because he’s the Rock, which was kind of a lame reason, especially when the shot was announced six months ago. That began a countdown that made everything Punk did meaningless, because there was no way it would be anyone but Rock taking the belt from him here. Yeah Punk got in some shots on Rock before the match, but this was as much of a layup as you could get. Also if Shield or anyone interferes, Punk is stripped of the title.

Rock, after waiting for them to chant his name, says he isn’t worried about Shield, even though they busted up his lung recently. He goes on a rant about how many hard things he’s been through, but redeems himself a bit by talking about his mom getting cancer but beating it to be here tonight. Punk has said that the people don’t count but Rock says every single one of them count to him. He reaches his hand out to everyone that believes in the Rock so he can get their power, if you smell what he’s cooking.

Raw World Title: The Rock vs. CM Punk

Punk of course has Heyman with him. He charges right into the brawl and actually pounds Rock down into the corner. A quick Rock Bottom is countered but Punk is sent outside. Rock follows him outside and sends the champion into the barricade before loading up the announce table. Punk comes back with a shot to the ribs and puts the table back together in a great bit. Back in and Rock scores with more right hands to knock Punk to the floor again.

Punk is whipped into the barricade one more time but he gets a boot up to stop a charging Bull. He finishes fixing the announce table instead of following up on Rock before dropping Rock ribs first on the barricade. They head inside again for a body vice from CM followed by a knee to the ribs for two. Off to a freaky looking hold where Punk pins Rock’s shoulders down but pulls back on his head to crank on the shoulders and back.

More choking follows and a knee to the back has Rock on the apron, followed by a springboard dropkick to send him outside. Punk tries a top rope ax handle to take Rock down but injures his knee in the process. Rock scores with some kicks to the knee but the champion easily sends him out to the floor to stop the comeback. Back in and Punk misses the springboard clothesline and reinjures the knee, giving Rock his opening.

A DDT gets one on Punk but he fights out of the Rock Bottom. The GTS is countered into a Sharpshooter attempt but Punk counters into the Anaconda Vice in a nice sequence. Rock rolls over into a cradle, forcing Punk to let go of the hold. Back up and tries the Rock Bottom but Punk counters into a rollup for two, only to be countered into a low seated Sharpshooter. Punk is next to the rope so naturally he takes thirty seconds to get the break.

Rock takes him to the floor and loads up the announce table again. They fight on top but Rock counters a GTS attempt into what was supposed to be a Rock Bottom but was really more like the table collapsing with Rock’s arm around Punk’s chest. Rock comes up holding his knee and both guys make it back in at an eight count. Punk scores with a high kick but both guys are down.

Back up and Rock wins a slugout before scoring with the spinebuster. He loads up the People’s Elbow and there go the lights. Cole can see Shield pulling Rock to the floor and powerbombing him through the table. The lights come back up and Rock is laid out as the referee has no idea what’s going on. The announcers try to tell Mike Chioda what happened and Punk feigns innocence.

He throws Rock back in for the pin and celebrates but here’s Vince to say Punk is stripped of the title for the interference. Rock says no and to restart the match. The bell rings again and Punk stomps away as JBL threatens to put Cole through a table for playing cheerleader. The Macho Elbow gets two but the GTS is countered into a spinebuster, setting up the People’s Elbow to end Punk’s reign.

Rating: B. It’s another good match but it felt like they were dancing around for twenty three minutes before we got to the obvious ending. The Shield stuff was a decent fake out but it really didn’t need to be there. Rock winning was obvious though and that really put a ceiling on how high this was going to get.

Rock celebrates for about three minutes to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. Yeah it’s a good show overall, but the major problem is obvious: there was no other possibly ending other than Rock vs. Cena at Wrestlemania 29 and almost everyone knew it. The show is definitely entetaining and actually really good at times, but it was so telegraphed up and down the card that it offers almost no excitement at all, even on the initial viewing. Still though, worth checking out if you have nothing else to do.

Ratings Comparison

Antonio Cesaro vs. The Miz

Original: C-

Redo: D+

Alberto Del Rio vs. Big Show

Original: B

Redo: C-

HELL NO vs. Rhodes Scholars

Original: C

Redo: C

Royal Rumble

Original: C+

Redo: B

The Rock vs. CM Punk

Original: B

Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: A-

Redo: B

That original overall rating is too high for what I gave everything else. Also I think the original last man standing match rating is closer to the accurate one. It just didn’t hold up as well on a second viewing, but it was good.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/01/27/royal-rumble-2013-by-the-book-and-still-awesome/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs

 




Smackdown – January 22, 2021: Fun Times

Smackdown
Date: January 22, 2021
Location: Tropicana Field, St. Petersburg, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves

We’re just over a week away from the Royal Rumble and that means it is time to start the last push towards the pay per view. Tonight features a title match of its own with Big E. defending the Intercontinental Title against an upgraded Apollo Crews, but Roman Reigns is not going to be happy and that could be great. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of last week’s show with Adam Pearce being set for the Royal Rumble title match against Roman Reigns but then having it switched out to Kevin Owens through some trickery.

Here are Roman Reigns and Paul Heyman for an opening chat. Reigns laughs off the idea of Card Subject To Change because Adam Pearce swapped himself out of the title match. You won’t be seeing Kevin Owens here tonight Reigns doesn’t want him here. Reigns comes here and goes to work because that’s what he does. He even put his health in danger, but what if he gets hurt? Man his back and neck have been bothering him lately. His ankles have been messed up since college. What if he just said his back was hurting too badly to wrestle at the Royal Rumble?

Cue Pearce to say this has gotten out of hand. Reigns doesn’t want to hear it and says Pearce needs to make his way back into the title scene. Pearce doesn’t buy that but Reigns says that Pearce can’t handle this. He hasn’t had a match in six years because he doesn’t have the heart. Maybe that’s why he never made it to the WWE.

Reigns and Heyman take this as disrespect, which means Pearce is disrespecting the family. Therefore, Heyman wants to do something about it and challenges Pearce to a fight. Heyman, citing his status as a New Yorker, says he will whip Pearce’s a**. Pearce says it’s on and Reigns promises Pearce is getting whipped too. See, I think we all know where this is going, but it’s still fun to see how it goes down the obvious path.

Here’s Sami Zayn to handcuff himself to the barricade for a protest, while declaring his entrance in the Royal Rumble.

Women’s Tag Team Titles: Charlotte/Asuka vs. Riott Squad

Charlotte/Asuka are defending, Billie Kay is here with the Squad, and Asuka seems fine after being terrified of Alexa Bliss on Raw. Charlotte beats on Ruby Riott to start as Natalya and Tamina are watching backstage. Asuka comes in for a few shots but a Kay distraction lets Riott bring LIv Morgan in. A high crossbody hits Charlotte and we take a break. Back with Morgan snapping off a headscissors on Charlotte and Riott sending her face first into the corner for two.

Charlotte finally kicks Riott away and nails the fall away slam to send Morgan into the corner. The Downward Spiral into the top turnbuckle allows the tag off to Asuka. The sliding knee gets two as everything breaks down. Asuka German suplexes Morgan but Riott comes back in to roll her up. Billie accidentally distracts the ref though meaning no count. Instead it’s a running hip attack to Morgan and Charlotte hits Natural Selection to finish Morgan at 8:32.

Rating: C. The wrestling was fine, but are we really just going to ignore Asuka being scared of Alexa Bliss and losing to her clean? Or everything with Charlotte and Lacey Evans/Ric Flair? Nothing at all? You might think that was worthy of a mention on this show but this was a run of the mill match with the titles being a backdrop to Billie screwing up again.

Post break, Billie tries to make amends by having the Squad in the Royal Rumble. She offers to help them practice by being Bianca Belair and Carmella (with impressions included) but the Squad, being as nice as they can, say Billie is out.

Here is a dressed up Daniel Bryan for a chat. He is VERY happy that the Royal Rumble coming up because it is all about the drama and the questions of what number you will have and when you are coming out. It makes him feel alive because he is ready to win and move on to main event Wrestlemania. Cue Cesaro to say that was a nice explanation, but he could have done it better (and in five languages).

Cesaro talks about being the first ever Andre the Giant battle royal winner so he will know how to win the Royal Rumble. Bryan is ready to fight right now but Cesaro says that since Bryan isn’t dressed to wrestle, he’ll issue an open challenge. Cue Dolph Ziggler, to say he can do anything in the ring and Cesaro is one of the few who can match him (Ziggler: “Sorry DB but it’s not 2014 anymore.”). The challenge is accepted.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Cesaro

Daniel Bryan is on commentary as they go to the grappling to start. Ziggler’s sleeper doesn’t work and Cesaro hits him in the face, setting up a rather long Cesaro Swing. They go to the pinfall reversal sequence with Ziggler getting two but having his superkick blocked. The Fameasser gives Ziggler two and we hit the sleeper again. That’s reversed into the Neutralizer and Ziggler is done at 3:43.

Rating: C+. They didn’t have much time here but Cesaro getting momentum is nice to see, even if there is no reason to believe that it is going to go anywhere. I’ve been burned by Cesaro’s pushes being canceled too many times now but at least we’re getting a little something here. It’s better than nothing after all these years.

We recap Sasha Banks challenging Reginald to a match before she is willing to face Carmella again.

Sasha Banks vs. Reginald

Reginald gives Sasha a flower to start so Sasha slaps the taste out of his mouth (even Carmella’s mouth drops open for that). Sasha climbs the ropes for a hurricanrana but Reginald flips forward to land on his feet. A waistlock doesn’t work for Sasha as Reginald backflips out and lands on his feet outside. Banks hits a baseball slide and whips him into the steps….where Reginald front flips off of them and sticks the landing. Back in and Reginald dives over a monkey flip attempt and then counters a sunset flip.

A Rey Mysterio sitout bulldog works better but Banks seems to tweak her knee. Reginald flips away from a basement dropkick but a powerbomb is countered into an armdrag. Banks manages to send him outside for the Meteora off the apron. Back in and Banks grabs his hands while still on the mat, only to pull herself up for another Meteora. Something like La Mistica is completely messed up but Banks pulls him into the Bank Statement for the tap at 4:00. Cole: “Now the sommellier has something to whine about!” Graves: “I can’t even with you.”

Rating: C-. I have no idea what to think here as this was much more of a gymnastics routine that made Reginald look like a star for reasons I don’t quite understand. Banks vs. Carmella is set up, but I’m not sure why they went this way to get here. The match was fun, but how does this make me want to see Carmella get a title shot?

Paul Heyman compliments Roman Reigns for setting up the match with Adam Pearce because he knows Reigns has a plan. Reigns says he just handed Heyman a microphone and now Heyman has to deal with this. Heyman panics.

We recap Apollo Crews cheating to become #1 contender last week.

Intercontinental Title: Big E. vs. Apollo Crews

Crews is challenging and charges into a belly to belly to start. The apron splash connects but Crews is back with a pump kick into the standing moonsault for two. Big E. hits the Rock Bottom out of the corner for the same and Crews heads outside with Big E. saying Crews made a mistake with the slap. Crews gets in a shot on the floor and heads back inside to go up top. Hold on though as Sami, still handcuffed, unlocks the cuffs as Crews hits a missile dropkick. Sami runs in for the Helluva Kick to Crews for the DQ at 2:55.

Post match Sami hits a Helluva Kick for Big E. as well.

Kevin Owens is in his car because he isn’t allowed in the ring tonight and says this is all going to end with Roman Reigns at the Royal Rumble. Owens talks about his tattoos telling a story, including his grandparents’ initials on his knuckles. They always supported him but they passed away before he could make it to WWE. Both of them had horrible illnesses but they kept fighting, just like he’ll do at the Royal Rumble when he becomes champion.

The Street Profits bring Sonya Deville (talking to Dolph Ziggler, who leaves before they get there), a fruit basket to congratulate her on her new job. They don’t get why she is hanging out with Ziggler but they get to the point: they want their rematch. Sonya isn’t sure though because they held the titles for a long time and Ford’s knee is still banged up. Some more teams need a chance and once the Profits are healthy, they can be back in the title scene. That seems to be cool, but the Profits are not happy after she leaves.

We recap the debut of Bayley’s talk show last week where she challenged Bianca Belair to an obstacle course race.

Bayley and Belair come out to go over the obstacles with Bayley going first. She takes her time and walks around some of the walls she is supposed to climb, and then drops the Chad Gable she is supposed to carry. Bayley finishes with a time of 1:12 and then says let’s EST this course for Belair, meaning it’s a lot harder. Belair starts fast but has to fireman’s carry Otis instead of Gable…..which she promptly does, and then dunks a basketball to win with 17 seconds left. Well that was impressive. Bayley pelts the basketball at Belair’s stomach though and the beatdown is on, including Bayley throwing her into the basketball goal.

Dominick tells Rey Mysterio that he has this, despite what Rey thinks.

Dominick Mysterio vs. King Corbin

Corbin starts fast by knocking Dominick to the floor, setting up a heck of a clothesline. Dominick fights back but the 619 is countered. A big right hand knocks Dominick silly and the End of Days finishes at 2:11. Well that was abrupt.

Paul Heyman vs. Adam Pearce

Pearce is in workout gear and Heyman, in his suit, tapes his fist on the way to the ring. Hold on though as Heyman tweaks his ankle on the steps and goes down. The referee checks on him but Heyman says “CARD SUBJECT TO CHANGE.” And yes indeed here’s Roman Reigns to hit the Superman Punch to send Pearce to the floor.

Reigns hits him low and sends him into the fan screens before taking him up to the stands like he did to Kevin Owens. Speaking of Owens, here he is in a hoodie to beat on Reigns. Owens is sent into the barricade and they head inside, where Owens nails a Stunner. Referees come out as Owens takes him outside again and beats on Reigns some more. A Stunner on the floor drops Reigns again and the Pop Up powerbomb puts him through the announcers’ table to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. I know we go over this every week but Smackdown continues to be so much better than Raw for one major reason: the show feels fun. This show didn’t have a ton of great wrestling but some angles were advanced and a hot ending angle made up for some of the weaker points. The pay per view is all but set on the Smackdown side and they did what they needed to do here for one of the last shows. It’s nothing great, but it’s not like Raw left the bar that high.

Results

Charlotte/Asuka b. Riott Squad – Natural Selection to Morgan

Cesaro b. Dolph Ziggler – Neutralizer

Sasha Banks b. Reginald – Bank Statement

Apollo Crews b. Big E. via DQ when Sami Zayn interfered

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs




Royal Rumble Count-Up – 2012 (2013 Redo): Here’s A Fresh Start

Royal Rumble 2012
Date: January 29, 2012
Location: Scottrade Center, St. Louis, Missouri
Attendance: 18,121
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Booker T

We wrap things up here with last year’s show. The Rumble is back to the thirty entrant variety which is probably the best move all around. The odds on favorite is Jericho who returned very recently before this show. Other than that we’ve got Daniel Bryan defending his newly won world title against Big Show and Henry in a cage, along with Punk defending against Ziggler. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is of course about going to Wrestlemania.

Smackdown World Title: Big Show vs. Daniel Bryan vs. Mark Henry

Bryan is champion and beat Show at TLC by cashing in his MITB case in 45 seconds. Show beat Henry at the same show and ran over Bryan’s girlfriend AJ on Raw to set all this up. This is one fall to a finish and it’s pin/submission/escape. Bryan immediately goes for the corner but Henry pulls him down and Show runs Bryan over for two. Show crushes Henry against the cage wall but has to stop to pull Bryan back inside. Bryan tries to run up again but Show catches him by the ankle and slams him back in.

Show loads up the WMD but hits the cage wall instead. The champion fires off some kicks but gets headbutted right back down. Bryan kicks the knee out even harder and fires off some kicks to Henry to keep the other monster down. He goes for the door but you know this isn’t ending that quickly. Henry makes the stop and demands that the referee CLOSE THAT DOOR. Show superkicks Henry down and it’s his turn to take over for awhile.

Bryan gets slammed down but Henry is back up again. A few punches put Show down because a dozen chair shots usually can’t, but a few punches can. Actually that’s a great way to keep Henry looking strong. The fans are cheering for Bryan as Henry and Show collide to put all three guys down. Show gets back up and clotheslines Bryan down a few times before superkicking him in the face. The chokeslam is countered and Bryan hits a tornado DDT on Show for two.

The LeBell (NO!) Lock is put on Show but Henry breaks it up in about a second. The WMD gets two on Henry but Bryan makes the save, which ticks Show off. Bryan SPRINTS up the cage but Show chases after him and grabs Bryan before he can get out. Bryan sits on the top of the cage and pounds away, only to be caught again. The champion is literally hanging from Show’s wrist before finally letting go and falling to the floor to retain the title.

Rating: D+. This really wasn’t all that great. At the end of the day, it was a lot of the same sequence over and over again with Show and Henry not having a ton of interaction at all. The ending didn’t look great either and I’m not sure why Show would just hold him out over the floor like that. This falls under the category of “…..really?” as it’s hard to buy Bryan keeping the belt here.

Long video on Cena and all the stuff he does for WWE. The man is insanely committed to that company.

Divas of Doom/Bella Twins vs. Eve Torres/Alicia Fox/Tamina/Kelly Kelly

The Divas of Doom are Beth and Natalya. Natalya and Tamina start things off and they collide a few times. Tamina slaps her in the face before chopping Nattie down for two. Off to Eve for that bouncing moonsault for two. Since that’s a pretty lame move, Natalya charges her into the corner and brings in Beth who blocks a rolling splash with knees to Eve’s back.

Off to let’s say Nikki for some basic stomps to the back and a quickly broken chinlock. Jerry is asked what he likes about the Bellas and he can’t even get an answer out. Not hot tag brings in Alicia who is immediately sent into the corner and chinlocked as well. Alicia finally counters by flipping Nikki forward and makes the actual hot tag to Kelly. There’s the screaming headscissors and a faceplant for two. Everything breaks down and almost everyone heads to the floor, where Kelly hits a HUGE dive to take everyone out. Back in and Beth SLAPS herself in to hit the Glam Slam on Kelly for the pin.

Rating: D+. This was your usual Divas match: they did their “sexy” spots, they had barely there outfits, Kelly screamed a lot, Beth beat up Kelly to end things. One interesting note from a year later: would they even be able to put together an eight Divas tag now? I’m thinking through the roster and I don’t know if I can name eight girls on the main shows right now.

We recap Ryder getting hurt at the hands of Kane. This was during the period where Ryder went from one of the hottest things in the company and US Champion to a rag doll that Kane destroyed over and over and over in the span of a few weeks until his push was completely destroyed. Eve blamed Cena for Ryder having his back broken for some reason.

Ryder is wheeled in and patronized by Johnny Ace (remember him?). Ace has a private room set up for Ryder but Eve comes up to yell at Ace first. Not much here but it’s setting up stuff later on tonight.

Kane vs. John Cena

This is when Kane had the welder’s mask look. Brawl to start with Kane beating Cena down into the corner as the fans are split on Johnny. A clothesline puts them both on the floor where Kane is sent knees first into the steps. Back in and Cena can’t hit the AA on Kane. That makes sense as after all, Kane is probably 175lbs lighter than Show who Cena throws around with near ease most of the time.

Kane kicks Cena down and gets two off an uppercut. A suplex gets the same and it’s off to a chinlock. Cena fights up and is sent into the buckle for his efforts followed by Kane’s stupid smother hold. John tries to counter into a Crossface but Kane comes out with a side slam. The idea here is that Cena can’t get anything going at all. The top rope clothesline takes Cena’s head off but Cena pops up and hits his shoulder block.

The Shuffle is countered by a grab of Cena’s throat and a big boot gets two. Cena blocks a superplex and hits the Shuffle off the top. That’s certainly a new one. The AA is countered by an elbow to the face and Kane kicks Cena out to the floor. Booker talks about how Cena is a good kid. I don’t think I ever recall Cena being called a kid since like 2004. Kane pounds on Cena in the aisle and that’s a double countout so we can do this match again next month.

Rating: D+. I know that’s a common theme tonight but it fits here again. These two didn’t work all that well together and the story was even worse. Then again, this was nothing more than giving Cena something to do for a few months until he could get ready for the biggest match of his career. This didn’t work for the most part.

The fight continues into the back where Kane finds a chair to lay to lay out Cena. To the shock of no one paying attention, Kane finds the door to Ryder’s private room and kicks the door in. Ryder is taken to the ring and tombstoned as Eve screams. Cena comes out to try to save Eve but gets chokeslammed by Kane who walks away. Ryder does a stretcher job, but somehow it would get even worse for him in the coming weeks.

BE A STAR!

Zack is wheeled out and Cena is booed for it. That’s the part of this story that never held up for me: why is this Cena’s responsibility? Ryder was the United States Champion. He should be able to defend himself.

We get a video on the Rock just like Cena got earlier. It’s shot in the back of Rock’s car and is more like a mini documentary. It focuses on how insane Rock’s life is and all of the stuff he does around the world.

Drew McIntyre vs. Brodus Clay

This is right after Brodus redebuted as the Funkasaurus so he was still a new character at this point. Brodus dances a lot, Drew punches him in the corner, Brodus headbutts him and hits the cross body (called WHAT THE FUNK) for the pin in about a minute.

Buy Slim Jims! For the troops!

We recap Punk vs. Ziggler who is challenging Punk on Ace’s behalf. This is during the “Ace is boring” phase where Punk made fun of him no matter what he did, so Ace helped Ziggler get a win over Punk to earn a title shot. Ace is also guest referee tonight just because. He’s openly admitted he’s going to screw Punk out of the title tonight, so HHH is going to evaluate his job status the next night on Raw, meaning Ace has to play nice.

Raw World Title: CM Punk vs. Dolph Ziggler

Punk is defending and Ace is referee. Johnny Ace is John Laurinitis but that’s a hard name to spell. Before the match, Ace says he’ll be the outside referee. Ok then. Wait we’re still not ready to go as Ace throws Vickie out as well. We finally get going and Ziggler tries a quick Fameasser which is countered into a failed GTS attempt. Punk tells Dolph it was that close. They feel each other out a bit longer until Ziggler starts strutting.

Punk finally gets his hands on Ziggler and puts on an abdominal stretch, complete with a wrapped toe and slicking back his hair ala Ziggler. Dolph heads to the floor and gets taken out by a suicide dive but shoves Punk off the top rope once they get back inside. Ziggler drops about eight elbows in a row and a jumping version gets two. We hit the chinlock with Ziggler cranking on the head way more than necessary.

The champ starts firing off chops and strikes before getting caught in the sleeper. That goes nowhere but neither does Punk’s Anaconda Vice attempt. Back to the sleeper but Dolph can’t get it on all the way. Instead there’s a perfect dropkick for two on Punk but the Fameasser is countered into a helicopter bomb for two. A swinging neckbreaker by the champ puts Dolph into the corner where the knee/bulldog combination actually works.

The GTS is countered into a slingshot but Punk lands on the middle rope. He comes off with a spinning cross body but Ziggler rolls through for a near fall in a cool sequence. The high kick gets two for Punk as does the Macho Elbow, drawing a Randy Savage chant. The GTS is countered again and the referee goes down as per the requirement in a world title mach. Punk hooks the Vice but Ace is checking on the down referee. Then Punk gets a rollup and there’s STILL no referee.

Ace sends the referee back in as Punk loads up the GTS, but Ziggler’s legs knock Ace to the floor. Ace sees the pin but refuses to count because he thinks Punk did it on purpose. Ziggler counters another GTS attempt into the Fameasser for two before pounding away a bit. The champ comes back with a slingshot and the GTS gets a pin from both referees to retain the title.

Rating: B+. This took awhile to get going as we were all waiting on the Ace stuff. The feud would go on for weeks until Jericho finally showed up to give Punk someone with charisma to feud with. The near falls at the end were a lot better than Ace, but it occurs to me that this was pretty much the same match he had last year. Good stuff though.

Rumble by the Numbers:

30 Superstars

1 winner

31 Hall of Famers in the Rumble

21 main events those Hall of Famers have been in at Wrestlemania

695 entrants who have been eliminated

39 entrants eliminated by Michaels, a record (Kane is second at 35)

13 consecutive Rumbles for Kane

11 eliminations for Kane in 2001

194,107lbs that have been in the Rumble, or over 97 tons, or 430 Big Show

421,883 people who have attended the Rumble

62:12 Rey Mysterio spent in the Rumble in 2006, a record

3 wins for Austin

1 second that Santino lasted in 2009

2 women who have competed in the Rumble

1, the entrant that has produced the same amount of winners as #30 at two each

27, the entrant with more winners than any other at four

55 percent of winners that have won the title at Wrestlemania

Royal Rumble

The Miz is #1 and talks about how he’s going back to the main event of Wrestlemania this year. His former apprentice Alex Riley is #2 which isn’t really surprising given how RANDOM these draws are. I always liked Riley and he always got a good reaction, which is clearly why he doesn’t get on TV more. Riley pounds away to start and runs Miz over with a forearm but walks into a big boot. Maybe it’s the old school fan in me but I don’t like a 6’0 guy using a big boot. Miz talks trash and low bridges Riley out with ease.

R-Truth, Miz’s former partner, is #3. Truth fires off some kicks and avoids the Finale before hitting a kind of powerslam. Miz gets sent to the apron for the second time but Truth turns his back to watch Cody come out at #4. A quick Disaster Kick puts Truth down (Cole says it hits Miz because those two are so hard to tell apart) and Truth gets double teamed for awhile. He manages to send Cody to the apron but gets caught in the Reality Check as the clock seems to be speeding up.

Justin Gabriel is #5 and things speed WAY up. A big spinwheel kick puts Miz down before Cody goes nuts on Gabriel in the corner. Primo is #6 to keep things low key to start. Actually he speeds things up as well and hits a sweet headscissors out of the corner to take Gabriel down. Truth hits the spinning forearm on Cody, only to be dumped out by Miz a second later. Since he’s still crazy, Truth pulls Miz to the floor and lays him out on the outside.

Mick Foley is #7 to fire up the crowd a little bit. He dumps Primo almost immediately before getting beaten on by Cody. Foley looks really old and slow here but to be fair, he is in fact old and slow. In a HILARIOUS bit, Ricardo Rodriguez is #8 but comes out in an old banged up, rusted out rental car. He’s even got the Del Rio scarf to hide some of his hideous pale body. We get a HUGE Ricardo chant as Foley and Gabriel have no idea what to do here.

Ricardo takes Cody down and pounds away before proposing an alliance with Foley of all people. They actually do team up and toss Gabriel, allowing Ricardo to do a CM Punk knee slide. We keep the comedy going with Santino at #9 and Ricardo runs from the Cobra. Santino beats on Ricardo and literally rolls him around the ring before pulling his trunks up and tossing Rodriguez.

Now we get my favorite spot of the match as Santino puts on the Cobra and Mick puts on Socko and it’s TIME FOR A DUEL!!! Before they can collide though it’s Epico at #10 but he falls to the powers of the socks and is out almost immediately. The socks COLLIDE until Miz and Cody pop back in (neither was eliminated) and dump Santino. Miz gets Socko but Cody dumps Mick. Fun comedy bit here to give us a good first act to the match.

Kofi Kingston is #11 and hits a double springboard clothesline before hitting a double Boom Drop. In at #12 is Jerry Lawler (Cole: “WHAT ARE YOU DOING???”) and he causes Miz to hit Cody by mistake. Lawler speeds things up and hits the middle rope punch with the lowered strap, only to be put out by Cody. Ezekiel Jackson is #13 and gets to do the usual power moves on each guy while the others lay around.

Jinder Mahal is #14 and the fans start chanting USA, even though the only two Americans in this match are Rhodes and Miz. Great Khali comes in at #15 and Mahal panics. Everyone gets chops and Mahal is out in just a few seconds. Jackson tries to pound away and is put out almost immediately as well. Hunico is #16 on that stupid bicycle of his and hits a spinning cross body on Miz and his Angle Slam on Cody.

Khali chops Hunico down as the ring is staying relatively empty. Booker T is #17 to surprise Cole. You would think he would have noticed that the man sitting next to him for over two hours wasn’t wearing pants but he never was considered that bright. Now we get the spot of the match as Miz shoves Kofi to the floor but Kofi holds himself up by his hands. Miz shoves Kofi into a handstand but Kingston WALKS ON HIS HANDS ACROSS THE FLOOR TO THE STEPS to get back in. FREAKING AWESOME MAN!

Dolph Ziggler is #18 as the ring is starting to get full. Hacksaw Jim Duggan makes his annual return at #19 to pop the crowd huge. He cleans house for a bit and we get a DOUBLE NOGGIN KNOCKER on Miz and Rhodes. Cody avoids a charge in the corner though and dumps Duggan in less than a minute. That’s the best idea at the end of the day. Miz and Cody team up to put out Booker and Khali at the same time.

We complete the trio with Michael Cole at #20. At the moment we’ve got Cole, Miz, Rhodes, Kingston, Hunico and Ziggler in the ring. Kharma returns at #21 in her only WWE match ever. She hits Cole so hard she knocks his headgear off so Cole eliminates himself. Well he gets to the apron where King and Booker eliminate him. Ziggler tells Kharma to get out so she DRILLS him. Kharma dumps Hunico but Ziggler sneaks up and eliminates her (Booker calls this doing the impossible. Not really Book.) to a ton of heat.

Sheamus is #22 to give us some A level star power. Well maybe B+ level. Things speed up with Sheamus destroying everyone and tossing Kofi out. There are the ten forearms in the ropes to Cody and ten to Miz as well. The Zig Zag is countered and Road Dogg is another surprise return at #23. He gets to clean house for a bit and earns a “you still got it” chant. In far less than 90 seconds, Jey Uso is #24.

Everyone pairs off until Jack Swagger is #25. After a few suplexes everything settles down into its usual brawling phase until Barrett is #26. He throws out Roadie and stomps away on a lot of people. David Otunga gets the lucky spot at #27 and poses a lot before he comes out. Not a lot happens so Orton comes in at #28 to pick things up a bit. Remember we’re in his hometown so everyone goes nuts.

Cody breaks up the RKO on Barrett so Randy hits the Elevated DDT on both Cody and Ziggler at the same time because he can. There’s an RKO to Barrett and he’s out. Chris Jericho, complete with a blackout of the arena, makes his return at #29. He’s still a face at this point and dumps Otunga to a good reaction. Big Show is #30 which was considered a letdown at the time. Dude, he was world champion a month ago. That’s hardly Darren Young coming out.

As Show comes in he pulls Swagger out from the floor, giving us a final grouping of Miz, Rhodes, Ziggler, Sheamus, Orton, Jericho and Big Show. That’s a pretty solid grouping. Show dumps Cody and Miz at the same time to get us down to five. Show tosses Ziggler as well to get us down to four. The big man cleans house but walks into an RKO, allowing Orton and Sheamus to pick him up and Randy clotheslines him out. Jericho dumps Orton immediately thereafter and we’re down to two.

The fans are entirely behind Jericho here so Sheamus runs him over a few times. Jericho’s bulldog is countered but Sheamus can’t throw him over the corner. Jericho charges into the Irish Curse but Sheamus can’t hit the High Cross. We get a great false finish with Jericho clotheslining Sheamus to the apron and then knocking him down to the point where Sheamus is hanging on by his leg. Sheamus comes back in with the slingshot shoulder but the Brogue Kick is countered into the Walls.

After the hold is broken Jericho gets knocked to the apron where he BARELY hangs on. They go to the top rope and both fall to the apron, meaning if they hit the floor they’re out. Both guys get back in and there’s the Codebreaker to Sheamus. Jericho gets Sheamus upside down but can’t get him out. A shot to the face ticks Sheamus off and he catches a Codebreaker attempt to put Jericho on the apron. The Brogue Kick sends Sheamus to Wrestlemania.

Rating: A-. This is one of those Rumbles that is great fun as you watch it live but it loses some steam on a second viewing. They spent a bit too much time on nostalgia and funny ideas here but they were still really good ideas. The ending with Sheamus and Jericho ROCKED and I have no idea why they never got to have a long PPV match. This is a really good Rumble but it never reaches that excellent level that some of them get to.

Sheamus celebrates a lot to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. The Rumble is a unique show as it has a way to save itself from a bad first half. That’s what happened here as the last two matches were certainly good enough to save it from the horrible first few matches. As usual the last two guys would both get world title shots with the winner getting the opening match instead of the real main event, but going on before Rock vs. Cena is hardly torture.

Ratings Comparison

Daniel Bryan vs. Mark Henry vs. Big Show

Original: C-

Redo: D+

Bella Twins/Divas of Doom vs. Alicia Fox/Kelly Kelly/Eve Torres/Tamina

Original: D+

Redo: D+

Kane vs. John Cena

Original: D+

Redo: D+

Brodus Clay vs. Drew McIntyre

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

CM Punk vs. Dolph Ziggler

Original: B

Redo: B+

Royal Rumble

Original: B+

Redo: A-

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: B

Just like last year, not much difference here.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2012/01/29/royal-rumble-2012/

That was fun. I really enjoy going back and doing these shows over again as a lot of them have great moments that you forget about over the years. The Rumble is a very unique show as it’s probably the only gimmick PPV that works almost every year. Over the years there have been a lot of gimmick shows like Survivor Series and most of them wind up being terrible at some point. The Rumble has been bad at times to be sure, but there has never been a period where the match wasn’t at least fun in some regard or valuable at the end of the day.

The best Rumbles tend to be the ones that follow the three act structure (dominant midcarder taking over to start, a lot of midcarders and lower guys in the middle, main eventers to wrap things up) with the best ones likely being 2000 and 2001. The comedy spots can help a lot as at nearly an hour, it’s hard to keep things serious the entire time. The only bad thing about it anymore is that it comes right before Elimination Chamber which takes away the feeling of the Road to Wrestlemania. Still though, it’s an excellent series and most are worth seeing if you haven’t before.

Speaking of Wrestlemania, I’ll be releasing the Redo series of that starting on March 10. I hope you enjoyed this as I did and it’s time for Wrestlemania season.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

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