Tribute to the Troops 2015: Yeah Fine
Tribute
Date: December 23, 2015
Location: Jacksonville Veterans Memorial Coliseum, Jacksonville, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole
It’s the annual holiday special with the WWE putting on a show for the military. This is also going to include some comedy and musical performances, plus a few appearances from various celebrities. WWE treats this like a big deal and it’s the big finale to WWE Week every year. Let’s get to it.
We open with the standard video talking about how much WWE wants to thank the troops.
JoJo sings the National Anthem. The red, white and blue ropes are back for the special occasion.
Here are Roman Reigns (minus the title but with it on his graphic), Dean Ambrose (same) and the Usos to open things up. They quickly thank the troops but here’s the League of Nations to interrupt. Sheamus (no title either) is amazed that Reigns thinks America is the greatest country in the world. He likes the Americans and thinks it might be in the top twenty nations in the world.
Barrett thinks everything in England is better, especially the food. Do you know how hard it is to find spotted dick around here? Reigns: “This is a family show!” Del Rio doesn’t like American TV because it doesn’t have any football (“I mean the real football!”) and he has to listen to stupid country music.
Sheamus thinks Ireland has the best everything in the world but Reigns cuts him off with a tater tots mention. The League accepts an invitation for a fight but here are the Wyatts to interrupt. Before anything else can happen, the Dudley Boyz, Ryback and Kane come out to give us sixteen men at once. A huge fight breaks out and we take a break.
We’ll have a sixteen man tag later tonight.
Rusev and Lana insult America, setting up this.
Jack Swagger vs. Rusev
Boot Camp match because we need a new way for Swagger to lose to Rusev. Swagger starts fast with a Patriot Lock but Lana slips Rusev an ammo box to take over. Rusev gets in a few shots but misses a charge and falls to the floor. A big clothesline knocks Rusev onto a cot and we take a break. Back with Rusev drilling Swagger with a foot locker and squashing Jack’s head against the box for two. Rusev throws him to the floor and waves the Bulgarian flag, easily knocking Swagger back as he tries to get in.
Swagger finally gets smart by waving Old Glory, ticking Rusev off enough that Jack can get inside again. Some clotheslines have Rusev in trouble and the Vader Bomb gets two. The jumping superkick puts Jack down again but he catches another superkick in the Patriot Lock. That goes nowhere but Rusev gets sent into the foot locker in the corner. Another Patriot Lock goes on and Rusev actually taps at 11:01.
Rating: C. Well it took him long enough. Not much of a hardcore match but they really didn’t have a choice but to go with Swagger here. Having the American hero (that’s a stretch) lose at this show would be like having the Evil Santa steal Christmas on the holiday Raw so it’s not like Rusev really loses anything. Good enough match but more weapons would have been appreciated.
Some members of the roster went to a Navy SEALS training camp.
Joel McHale loves the troops.
Harrison Ford loves the troops as well.
Mark Henry vs. Bo Dallas
Bo is dressed as Uncle Sam. For some reason he slaps Mark in the face and pounds on his back a few times. Mark snaps up and Bo is terrified. Bo: “I’m gonna go back this way!” The World’s Strongest Slam ends Bo at 46 seconds.
The US Women’s National Soccer Team loves the troops.
Eva Longoria loves the troops.
Train performs.
Some troops wish their families Happy Holidays.
Wesley Snipes loves the troops.
Kevin Owens vs. Ryback
Before the match, Owens praises Canada, especially Quebec. We even get some French from Owens until Ryback cuts him off to get things started. Ryback muscles him up for a delayed vertical suplex but Owens knees him in the ribs and grabs an early chinlock. That goes nowhere so Ryback tries a Shell Shock, only to have Kevin grab the ropes. They hit each other from the apron and Owens falls to the floor for a breather. Owens takes the countout at 3:06.
Rating: D. Oh come on what do you want me to say here? This is a match that doesn’t mean anything but gives the fans something to smile about. I’m glad they didn’t have Owens take a clean loss though, especially with the new character having started up after this show was taped.
A military couple got to go backstage the show and had a Coke with Roman Reigns.
Howie Mandel performs.
Joe Manganiello loves the troops.
JJ Abrams loves the troops.
Brie Bella/Alicia Fox/Charlotte/Becky Lynch vs. Paige/Team BAD
This is your annual “here’s a bunch of good looking women” match. Naomi does her stupid shaking spot to Charlotte to start, earning her some chops. Brie, who is clearly a face this time, comes in for some YES Kicks. Tamina clotheslines Brie’s head off to break up BRIE MODE (well done) and it’s off to Paige for some shots in the corner. Brie shoves Naomi into the corner for a break, kicks Tamina away, and makes the hot tag to Becky. Everything breaks down and it’s a Bank Statement to make Alicia tap at 4:40.
Rating: D+. This was fine for what it was and at least we got to see Sasha do something other than be the female Kofi. It’s really kind of hard to find stuff to talk about with these matches because the stories are about two weeks behind and the matches mean nothing. Still though, this was a way to get the women on the show and little more so it accomplished its goal.
Clips of the roster meeting some troops.
Toby Keith loves the troops.
Neil Patrick Harris loves the troops.
Train performs again.
Cris Collinsworth loves the troops.
Dean Ambrose/Roman Reigns/Usos/Kane/Dudley Boyz/Ryback vs. Wyatt Family/League of Nations
This is joined in progress, meaning we get to skip the entrances to save some time. Dean is in control of Rowan but it’s quickly off to Strowman vs. Bubba. Strowman wants Kane though and it’s time for the battle of the monsters. Kane can’t slam him though and Braun plants him with a slam of his own. The smaller monster fights back though and knocks Braun to the floor, setting up a big staredown as we take a break.
Back with Harper getting two off a swinging Boss Man Slam to Jimmy. Bray comes in for the backsplash and it’s time for the League to start taking turns beating Jimmy down. Jimmy gets in an enziguri to Sheamus but can’t make the hot tag. Instead it’s Harper putting on a headlock until Jimmy suplexes him down in a surprising power display. Now the hot tag brings in Ambrose for the top rope elbow on Harper.
Everything breaks down and Rowan takes What’s Up. Dean and the Usos hit dives and it’s time for the parade of finishers. It takes a Superman punch, a double shoulder from the Dudley Boyz, a double superkick from the Usos and a Meathook to put Strowman over the top (finally putting him off his feet in a nice touch). Dirty Deeds puts Harper away at 13:25.
Rating: C. Yeah fine. This has become a tradition on these shows and it’s a good way to put everyone out there for a big, fun main event for a fun show. I don’t know why you would expect this to be anything more than it was as it’s been the same idea for years now. Still though, fun enough and that’s all it needed to be.
The American flag comes down and the good guys celebrate to end the show.
Overall Rating: C. What else do you want me to say about this show? It doesn’t mean anything for storylines and the wrestling is average at best, but that’s all it’s supposed to be. I haven’t cared for the show as much since they stopped going overseas but really it’s harmless fun. Standard show this year, which is probably best all around.
Results
Jack Swagger b. Rusev – Patriot Lock
Mark Henry b. Bo Dallas – World’s Strongest Slam
Ryback b. Kevin Owens via countout
Team BAD/Paige b. Brie Bella/Alicia Fox/Becky Lynch/Charlotte – Bank Statement to Fox
Dudley Boyz/Roman Reigns/Dean Ambrose/Ryback/Kane/Usos b. Wyatt Family and League of Nations – Dirty Deeds to Harper
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of Wrestlemania at Amazon for just $3.99 at:
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Smackdown – December 22, 2015: Now Bring Us A Better Smackdown, Now Bring Us A Better Smackdown
Smackdown
Date:
Location: Wells Fargo Arena, Des Moines
Commentators: Michael Cole, Booker T., Jerry Lawler
This is the special live show that follows the age of rule of “don’t have a show on Christmas Eve”. It’s also a stacked show as WWE tries to get some more attention on Smackdown before the move to the live broadcast just after the new year. Therefore we have two title matches as Dean Ambrose and the New Day defend their titles. Let’s get to it.
Opening sequence, this time with Christmas trees at the beginning.
Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. Lucha Dragons
The Dragons are challenging. Before the match, New Day plugs their new Christmas album, featuring songs such as Rudolph the Red Nosed Unicorn and Kofi the Snowman. Woods is the odd man out here as Cara dropkicks Kofi to start. It’s quickly off to Kalisto for the monkey flip 450 but he gets Big E. for his luck. E. tries a slam but gets kneed in the face, followed by a staggering dropkick. Cara’s missile dropkick gets two but Kofi comes in with a hurricanrana. That’s not really a heel move but then again the New Day aren’t really heels. A baseball slide puts Kofi down and it’s time for tromboning and a break.
Back with Big E. missing a splash and it’s the hot tag to Kalisto as everything picks up. Woods finally trips him up to take over again, allowing Big E. to drive Kalisto HARD into the barricade. That was one of the hardest looking crashes I’ve ever seen. It’s time for the Unicorn Stampede bug Kalisto flips out of a belly to belly and makes the hot tag. Everything speeds up again and the Dragons score with a double suicide dive. Back in and Cara kicks E. in the head, setting up Salida Del Sol. Kofi breaks up the Swanton though and Cara moonsaults into the Big Ending to retain the titles at 12:37.
Rating: C+. This was fine for what it needed to be and lets New Day look good before their big showdown with the Usos. The Dragons were a good choice for a quick challenge and the match worked well enough. I was hoping they would push Kalisto as something on his own after the performance in the tournament and the big Salida Del Sol but it’s just more false hope.
Santino puts the star on his tree but someone (who looked like Stardust) steals it.
Dolph Ziggler, Charlotte, Tyler Breeze and Roman Reigns wish us a Merry Christmas.
Ambrose says he’s sore from the last week but says he’s going to hit Ziggler and Owens with whatever it takes to retain Intercontinental Champion.
Ryback/Kane/Dudley Boyz vs. Wyatt Family
Ryback and Rowan get things going but it’s quickly off to Bubba for a shoulder and we take a quick break. Back with Harper putting Bubba in a chinlock to slow things down even more. It’s off to Strowman who wants Kane, which is exactly what he gets. The smaller monster is easily pounded down and it’s off to Wyatt for some shots in the corner. Kane comes back with a quick faceplant on Harper before bringing in Ryback. The middle rope dropkick puts Harper down but he grabs a Michinoku Driver as we go to our second break.
Back with Rowan holding Ryback in a head vice until a spinebuster gives him a breather. Another double tag brings in D-Von and Bray with the Dudley taking over. The top rope headbutt gets two on Bray and everything breaks down. Rowan clotheslines Ryback over the barricade and the reverse 3D gets two more on Wyatt. There’s a superkick to D-Von and Sister Abigail ends Bubba at 16:08.
Rating: C. This is the kind of match the Wyatts need to win. They’re slowly being built back up but at some point they have to actually do something. It’s also amazing how much more I can tolerate these things with fewer ancient ECW guys in there and people like Ryback having something to do instead. Not a great or even good match but it did its job.
Santino’s Christmas party is a disaster as everything has been wrecked. This brings in Stardust and the Ascension to take credit for destroying everything. Neville, in a hilarious elf hat, comes in to stand up for Christmas. Titus, in the same hat, appears and says he’ll put a boot down Ascension’s chimney. A tag match is made for later.
Rusev/Alberto Del Rio vs. Usos
Jey chops Rusev to start but gets dragged into the corner as the League starts taking turns on him. Del Rio hits a top rope right hand and Rusev rakes a boot over the face. Jey gets over for the tag and Jimmy comes in for two off a double flapjack. Everything breaks down and Jey’s dive over the top nails Alberto. Jimmy does the same to Rusev but they’re both dropped with kicks as we take a break.
Back with everything breaking down and Jimmy being sent into the steps. Del Rio snaps Jey’s throat across the rope but gets caught on top. A superplex is broken up and it’s time for the top rope double stomp. Thankfully Jey realizes that he can move to break it up, only to have a Rusev distraction allow Rusev to knock him back into place. The stomp is good for the pin at 10:30.
Rating: C-. I wasn’t feeling this one quite as much as the Usos win an award, beat the champions last night and then lose here. As usual it’s the same story of bad booking going in the same circles over and over. I’m getting tired of trying to care about a team and then having them lose all over again. What does the win over New Day last night mean now? Watchable match but more bad booking.
Post match the League loads up the Brogue Kick on Jimmy but Reigns makes the save.
Dean Ambrose, Santino Marella, Becky Lynch and New Day wish us a Merry Christmas.
Titus O’Neil/Neville vs. Ascension
Santino introduces Neville and Titus (“My favorite Irishman!”) and it’s Neville and Konor starting things off. Neville is in some early trouble thanks to the power game so it’s off to Viktor. That doesn’t go very well as the hot tag brings in Titus. Viktor takes him down as well and everyone surrounds Santino on the floor. The Cobra is loaded up but Santino just wipes himself off with it, allowing Neville to dive onto all three. Back in and a big boot sets up the Red Arrow to Viktor for the pin at 3:09.
Rating: D+. Nothing match here and the saving Christmas story was just tacked on. I mean, this is no Mark Henry vs. Damien Sandow or JBL Claus vs. Mick Claus but then again this isn’t much of a show anyway. Neville getting the pin is a good thing though after they gave him an award last night and then had him lose.
We recap Ziggler vs. Owens vs. Ambrose.
Dolph says he’s been going about this the wrong way but tonight he’s going to make 2016 the year of Dolph Ziggler.
Charlotte vs. Brie Bella
Non-title with Becky Lynch on commentary. Charlotte, in a Mrs. Claus skirt, kicks away to start as the fans want Becky. A Flair knee drop misses and Becky can’t answer if she’d rather have friends or win the Divas Title. Charlotte ducks the big YES kick and hits a quick spear. Cue Team BAD as a snowman, a reindeer and…..I’m not sure what Tamina is supposed to be. They throw eggnog on Becky and beat her down but Charlotte puts Brie in the Figure Eight for the win at 3:39.
Rating: D. Angle advancement here as we need Brie on TV to set up the new season of Total Divas. I mean, I hear there’s going to be Brie vs. Nikki drama this time. Becky vs. Charlotte should be good, much like when we FINALLY get rid of Team Bad as the female New Day, minus any of the actual comedy.
Becky is annoyed at Charlotte post match.
Owens promises to turn Smackdown into the Kevin Owens Show and says Renee Young looks ridiculous.
Intercontinental Title: Dean Ambrose vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Kevin Owens
Ambrose is defending so of course he comes out first. Owens is quickly sent outside but he pulls Dolph outside. Dean breaks up a powerbomb attempt on the floor so Owens backsplashes both guys as we take a break. Back with everyone heading up the ramp and Owens throws Ziggler through the Christmas presents. Ziggler breaks up a powerbomb to Ambrose and they throw Owens off the stage through more trees.
That leaves Ziggler and Ambrose to fight on the stage with empty boxes. They head back to the ring with Ziggler loading up a superplex, only to have Owens runs back in for the save. Owens superkicks Ziggler and Dean clotheslines Kevin to put all three down. Dean goes up top but Dolph runs up the corner for a super facebuster. Ziggler is sent into the steps to give Owens two on Ambrose.
Dolph runs back in for a sleeper but gets thrown to the floor, leaving Owens to suplex Dean onto his head for two. As the referee makes sure Dean can remember what planet he’s on, Owens is smart enough to go beat on Ziggler to give the crowd something to watch. Dean gets back up and tries Dirty Deeds on Owens but Ziggler comes in to add the Zig Zag to Ambrose, putting all three down again. Ziggler covers Dean for two and superkicks Owens but walks into Dirty Deeds to retain Dean’s title at 13:25.
Rating: B-. Good, action packed match here that was a few miles ahead of everything else on the show with all three guys working hard to get the match over. Again they made sure to keep Owens from getting pinned which is the exactly right idea to keep the feud going. Ziggler is the kind of guy who can lose all the time and still be fine but Owens might be going somewhere big. Good stuff here and almost enough to save the show.
Owens destroys the Christmas trees as Ambrose celebrates to take us out.
Overall Rating: C. Totally skippable show here with really nothing major happening. The two title matches were nice but you can tell they’re saving their big stuff for the regular premiere on USA. It doesn’t help that this is a week they basically take off for the holidays because we get seven hours of mostly lame WWE in three days. This was nothing to see though and a really standard episode of Smackdown: watchable wrestling that meant absolutely nothing.
Results
New Day b. Lucha Dragons – Big Ending to Cara
Wyatt Family b. Dudley Boyz/Ryback/Kane – Sister Abigail to Bubba
Rusev/Alberto Del Rio b. Usos – Top rope double stomp to Jey
Titus O’Neil/Neville b. Ascension – Red Arrow to Viktor
Charlotte b. Brie Bella – Figure Eight
Dean Ambrose b. Kevin Owens and Dolph Ziggler – Dirty Deeds to Ziggler
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of Wrestlemania at Amazon for just $3.99 at:
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Monday Night Raw – December 21, 2015: I’ll Accept This Show on WWE’s Behalf
Monday
Date: December 21, 2015
Location: Target Center, Minneapolis, Minnesota
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Byron Saxton
It’s the Slammy Awards! Tonight is all about picking the best of the year, or at least whoever the fans pick as the best of the year. The big award is of course Superstar of the Year which is likely going to Roman Reigns again. The other major story though is fallout from last week’s World Title change, which likely means Stephanie going after Reigns. Let’s get to it.
We open with a long recap of Reigns beating Sheamus and infuriating the McMahons last week.
Here’s a very happy Stephanie to open things up. She thinks we’re confused by her mood but it’s very simple: McMahons are fighters and tonight is all about a celebration. Cue Roman Reigns who says everyone is in a good mood tonight. Stephanie is really not happy that he’s here but Reigns says he doesn’t sweat anyone, including the League of Nations, any of the McMahons or HHH himself.
That’s too much for Stephanie as she starts shrieking at him to get out of her ring and does her usual whining about her family and her legacy and all that jazz. Reigns doesn’t really care and turns his back on her, eventually leaving very slowly. This makes Stephanie demand that he come back here but Reigns just keeps going. Stephanie says that means consequences so she makes the Usos vs. the New day in a handicap match and Ambrose vs. Sheamus inside a cage. Reigns keeps going up the steps and posing with the title.
It’s time for the first award with Dolph Ziggler (in a tuxedo) presenting Breakout Star of the Year. Here are the nominees:
Kevin Owens
Neville
Charlotte
Tyler Breeze
Braun Strowman
After a break, the winner is…..Neville. Neville says he’s excited about this and completely surprised until Kevin Owens comes out to interrupt. Owens says that’s his award and gets in a fight with Ziggler until……cue the Wyatts for a completely unrelated match.
Bray Wyatt vs. Kane
Bray gets punched into the corner to start but a Harper distraction lets him come back with a big running clothesline. The Wyatts go after Kane so he heads outside after him, drawing a quick DQ at 54 seconds.
Kane gets beaten down post match until the Dudley Boyz and Tommy Dreamer come out for the save because this is still a feud.
Kane/Dudley Boyz/Tommy Dreamer vs. Wyatt Family
This is joined in progress with Dreamer in trouble and the announcers comparing Kane to Chewbacca. Dreamer quickly fights up and makes the tag to Kane for a kick to Harper’s face. It’s off to Bubba for some house cleaning but everything breaks down a few seconds later. There’s What’s Up to Harper, which JBL says is like a sofa. 3D to Rowan but Strowman takes Bubba and D-Von down with a double clothesline. The discus lariat puts D-Von out for the pin at 2:43 shown.
Here’s the returning (for one night only I believe) Santino Marella to present the LOL Laugh Out Loudest Moment of the Year. The nominees are:
Edge and Christian vs. New Day in a trombone vs. kazoo battle
The Bushwhackers’ Hall of Fame induction speech
Miz’s “commercial” for erectile dysfunction
The Authority dances with New Day
R-Truth thinks he’s in the Money in the Bank ladder match
After a break, the winner is R-Truth. Well that’s one out of two at least. Santino tries to accept the award for himself but Truth comes out and starts a light brawl for the trophy.
We get a quick visit from Old Saint Mick (with elf Noelle). He wishes us all Happy Holidays and says he’s very sorry for giving Xavier Woods that trombone last year.
Here’s Paul Heyman to present the OMG Moment of the Year Award. After saying that Brock Lesnar should win all the awards save for LOL and Diva of the Year, here are the nominees:
Seth Rollins cashes in Money in the Bank at Wrestlemania
Brock Lesnar the night after Wrestlemania
Kalisto’s Salida Del Sol through the ladder at Tables Ladders and Chairs
Wyatt Family kidnaps Undertaker at Hell in a Cell
Sheamus cashes in Money in the Bank at Survivor Series
After a break, Kalisto wins. Really? It was good but biggest shock of the year? Not really. Kalisto is here in a suit and without much to say as an acceptance speech.
Dolph Ziggler vs. Kevin Owens
Ziggler goes right at him to start and tries the sleeper so Owens drops back with all his weight for the break. A big elbow sends Ziggler to the floor and Owens shouts that HE is the breakout star. Well to be fair he’s right. We hit the chinlock on Dolph and we actually show the brawl from earlier tonight which set this up. Well at least it’s during a hold but dude, it was less than an hour ago.
Back up and Ziggler grabs a rollup for two, only to have his head taken off by a clothesline. After another chinlock, Dolph grabs the running DDT and we take a break. We come back with Owens getting two off a superplex but eating a superkick to put him outside. A quick Fameasser gets two for Dolph (in case you thought Owens was doing it) but Owens comes right back with the Pop Up Powerbomb for the pin at 11:08.
Rating: C. Well at least Owens won. Unfortunately we’re still stuck in the same circle of chasing our own tail with the midcard because they had something interesting with Owens and then reverted him back to the same character just a week later. I’m sure it just wasn’t getting over because of some social media score determining that people didn’t care enough or whatever, because that’s what seems to run WWE these days.
Here’s Stephanie (of course) to present Superstar of the Year with every member of the roster as a nominee. We get a quick video of everyone on the roster before the nominees are listed as:
Roman Reigns
Sheamus
John Cena
Kevin Owens
Dean Ambrose
Bray Wyatt
New Day (all three members)
Undertaker
Kane
Sting
Brock Lesnar
Seth Rollins
Post break the winner is……Seth Rollins, who actually limps out on crutches. The fans thank him but he says this was obvious the whole time. Seth does his usual recap of his year and says that his success went away just as quickly as it came. That title is coming back to him in the new year because he will retake what he never lost.
John Cena returns next week to face Alberto Del Rio.
Alberto Del Rio vs. Jack Swagger
I KNEW IT WOULD BE SWAGGER!!! As soon as I saw Del Rio in the ring I knew it would be Swagger. It had to be Swagger because he’s Del Rio’s personal jobber and that’s the only idea WWE has for Swagger. Non-title of course. Del Rio kicks him to the floor and hits a quick baseball slide as we take a break. Back with Del Rio getting two off a DDT but Jack ducks the low superkick and grabs a quick belly to belly. The Vader Bomb gets two and Jack loads up a superplex, only to slip and get caught with the top rope double stomp for the pin at 7:07. Not enough seen to rate but this was the same stuff we’ve seen from them every time.
The League beats Jack down post match.
Here’s Mark Henry to present the new Hero in All of Us Award, which seems to be for best charity work. The nominees are:
Natalya
Roman Reigns
Big Show
Titus O’Neil
John Cena
After a break, the winner is John Cena. He’s not here tonight but Henry says that Cena and all the other nominees do this out of the goodness of their hearts rather than for awards. Henry accepts the award on Cena’s behalf.
There were some other awards given out before the show went on the air, including:
Rivalry of the Year – Lesnar vs. Undertaker
WWE Network Original Show of the Year – Steve Austin Show
Double Cross of the Year – Damien Mizdow
Extreme Moment of the Year – Reigns attacks HHH
Here’s Santa Claus (as played by Bo Dallas) to introduce the Surprise Return of the Year. He’s the REAL Santa and not the fat old man at the mall. Here are the nominees:
Dudley Boyz
Chris Jericho
Alberto Del Rio
Kane
Sting
Post break the winner is Sting, who also isn’t here tonight either.
New Day vs. Usos
Non-title handicap match. Before the match, New Day blames the fans for spoiling the Tag Team of the Year award. Therefore, they’re going to SPOIL STAR WARS! Kofi cuts Big E. off because he hasn’t seen it yet. Woods: “YOU HAVEN’T SEEN IT YET?????” Dancing solves the problem and we’re ready to go.
Jimmy and Kofi get things going with the twins starting in on the arm. Kofi works on Jey’s arm as well, only to get kicked into the corner. Big E. and Xavier break up the Rikishi attack and all three have to move before the Usos can dive on them. Back with Jey being dragged into the corner for the Unicorn Stampede with Woods dropping to the floor for some musical accompaniment.
Big E. slaps on the abdominal stretch for a bit and gets two off the Warrior splash. Jey fights up and makes the hot tag to Jimmy for some good house cleaning. The Samoan drop gets two on Woods and New Day heads outside, only to have Big E. break up the double dive. Not that it matters as Jimmy rolls Woods up for the pin at 10:59.
Rating: C-. For every few steps this company takes forward, we get something like this. You make this a handicap match so the Usos can lose, but oh no because you need to keep them looking strong for later so let’s put them over the champions here because we have no other way to actually get them over. Like giving them an award or something. This is the kind of stuff that drives me the craziest and it just keeps happening over and over. Also there was no mention of the Stephanie/Reigns story from earlier.
Here’s R-Truth to present Diva of the Year. The nominees are:
Nikki Bella
Naomi
Paige
Sasha Banks
Charlotte
Back with…..Paige winning. Well that’s quite the surprise. Oh wait it’s actually a Steve Harvey joke because Truth read it wrong. Therefore, Nikki Bella wins. See, in WWE, just saying something exists means that it’s funny. Nikki comes out and has Paige stand there next to her as she dedicates this to every woman in the company. So she’s a face again.
Rusev vs. Neville
The League is here and Miz is on commentary. Rusev stomps him down in the corner to start and we hit an early chinlock as Miz says Neville could go even further with the right management. Neville fights up and kicks Rusev to the post, only to be sent into the post. A belly to belly sends Neville crashing down and we take a break.
Back with Neville moonsaulting to the floor as JBL gets in his weekly “THERE’S YOUR SPORTSCENTER HIGHLIGHT” line. Neville loads up the Red Arrow with Rusev across the ring. That goes as well as you would think as he dives into the jumping superkick, setting up the Accolade to give Rusev the win at 7:38.
Rating: D+. So they’ll protect the Usos but not Neville, who won an award earlier tonight on the show? Another nothing match here as Neville is still a jobber but at least Rusev got a win for a change. He’s still a mess after Lana came back so it’s cool to see him acting like his old self for at least one night.
The League beats Neville down as well.
Miz is presenting the THIS IS AWESOME Award. After complaining about not being nominated, he introduces the nominees as:
Brock Lesnar destroying J and J’s car
Randy Orton’s RKO to Rollins at Wrestlemania
Stephanie McMahon starting the Divas Revolution
The Shield reuniting to beat down Orton
Rock and Ronda Rousey at Wrestlemania
After we come back, Stephanie FINALLY gets her award as Rock and Ronda Rousey wins. Miz accepts on Rock’s behalf and plugs Santa’s Little Helper.
Becky Lynch vs. Brie Bella
Rematch from Smackdown because it’s a meaningless show. Brie takes over to start and puts on a quickly broken chinlock, only to knee Becky down. The YES Kicks get two and we hit a seated abdominal stretch. Well stretch is a relative term as Brie isn’t pulling back or anything but she’s trying. We hit another armbar as this has been all Brie so far. Becky makes her comeback with clotheslines but THIS IS A BRIE BELLA MATCH so she cuts her down with a dropkick, only to get rolled up into the Disarm-Her for the tap at 5:14.
Rating: D+. As I think we’ve learned by now, Brie really isn’t that good. They had an idea here with the arm but Brie really couldn’t carry this to anything beyond the run of the mill Divas match. She still has no idea if she’s a face or a heel and it makes for some really awkward matches.
Ric Flair introduces the nominees for Match of the Year:
John Cena vs. Brock Lesnar vs. Seth Rollins – Royal Rumble
Sting vs. HHH – Wrestlemania
John Cena vs. Kevin Owens – Elimination Chamber
Roman Reigns vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Kevin Owens vs. Alberto Del Rio – Raw – October 26
Undertaker vs. Brock Lesnar – Hell in a Cell
The final award of the night goes to Undertaker vs. Brock Lesnar and for the fourth time tonight, the big name isn’t here to accept. Heyman comes out instead and says Brock doesn’t come out and accept awards. Brock wants a fight but no one in the back is man enough to face Brock Lesnar. One phenom this year stood up and took a beating but there is only one conqueror.
The cage is lowered.
In the back, the League attacks the Usos with Rusev and Del Rio putting on their submissions. Both of them get Brogue Kicks as well.
Ambrose defends tomorrow night against Kevin Owens and Dolph Ziggler. Why should Ziggler get a shot when Owens pinned him earlier tonight?
Sheamus vs. Dean Ambrose
Non-title. Sheamus Brogue Kicks Dean before he can get inside and since referees have no authority in WWE, the match starts anyway. We get the ten forearms to the chest as the fans chant SHEAMUS IS BORING. Sheamus actually acknowledges them and waves the chants on, only to get backdropped into the cage wall. Dean goes for the climb but Sheamus is right up after him for White Noise off the top for two.
Now it’s Sheamus going up but getting crotched down, only to be met by the League as he tries to escape. That’s fine with Dean as he dives down onto Sheamus with the elbow for a VERY close two. Del Rio slams the door on Dean’s head though, drawing out Reigns to take out the League with a chair. Thanks for coming BEFORE they cost your buddy the match Roman.
The League runs off and Sheamus climbs up, only to have Reigns waiting on him with a chair. Roman throws it to Dean and Sheamus is caught. Dirty Deeds onto the chair doesn’t even get a cover as Dean climbs, allowing Sheamus to catch him on top. They slug it out on top of the cage and slowly come down with Dean getting headbutted off for the win at 10:45.
Rating: C. This was fine with Ambrose and Reigns surviving one more time. They’ve done a great job of setting those two up as unbreakable brothers, meaning that the eventual split is going to be even better. Sheamus losing here is fine enough because no one buys him as a real threat to win the title again and his rematch is likely coming on the first Raw of the year instead of at the Rumble or on any other big stage.
Tom Phillips asks Stephanie for her reaction so she beats him down with slaps. Tom sells them like death to end the show.
Overall Rating: C-. I’m a big sucker for the Slammy Awards but this didn’t do it for me. The big stars not being there to accept really crippled things and most of the award picks were fine, meaning there wasn’t much to get annoyed about. Cena being back next week will help and there are places they can go from here, but the show as a whole was really nothing great. That puts it WAY ahead of recent weeks though so it’s definitely not horrible, but still nothing I’m going to remember by the new year.
Results
Kane b. Bray Wyatt via DQ when the Wyatt Family interfered
Wyatt Family b. Tommy Dreamer/Dudley Boyz/Kane – Discus lariat to D-Von
Kevin Owens b. Dolph Ziggler – Pop Up Powerbomb
Alberto Del Rio b. Jack Swagger – Top rope double stomp
Usos b. New Day – Rollup to Woods
Rusev b. Neville – Accolade
Becky Lynch b. Brie Bella – Disarm-Her
Dean Ambrose b. Sheamus – Ambrose escaped the cage
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of Wrestlemania at Amazon for just $3.99 at:
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Smackdown – December 17, 2015: They Couldn’t Be This Stupid
Smackdown
Date:
Location: Prudential Center, Newark, New Jersey
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Booker T., Rich Brennan
It’s kind of amazing to see how fast things have gone from boring to a lot more entertaining in the span of a few days. Going into Sunday’s pay per view, things were ice cold and had nowhere to go but up. Now things are hot again with a new World Champion in Roman Reigns as we’ve hit the road to the Royal Rumble running. Let’s get to it.
Of course we start with a recap of Reigns beating down HHH on Sunday, setting up his World Title win on Monday night to really stick it to the Authority again.
Here’s Reigns to kick things off. Reigns talked about how big a deal Monday was but what made it really special was doing it on his daughter’s birthday. That meant he could take it home and show his family what he was working for. However, his days in WWE are probably numbered after he speared HHH and Superman punched Vince McMahon (Lawler: “WOO HOO!”). The repercussions won’t come until Monday because this is Smackdown. So we’ve finally reached the point where the champion is admitting that nothing happens on Smackdown.
Here’s Sheamus to interrupt. He’s happy that Reigns got his moment and this time he even lasted more than 5:15. It won’t be lasting much longer though because that title is coming back around his waist. Reigns says anytime fella but Sheamus brings up all the people Reigns has hurt over the last few days. The Authority has launched an official investigation and Reigns is on the sidelines, meaning he can’t fight or even appear on WWE TV. Wait are they ripping off TNA’s stupid storyline now??? Sheamus asks him to leave right now but Reigns says come make him. Security tries instead and only earn themselves a beating.
Ryback vs. Alberto Del Rio
Say it with me: non-title, though in this case it makes a bit more sense as Ryback lost on Sunday. They actually start with some amateur stuff as Ryback takes him to the mat and works on a wristlock. Del Rio tries some right hands in the corner and has to escape a powerbomb attempt.
They botch what looked to be the Thesz press so Ryback throws him down with a gorilla press instead. Ryback gets a bit too cocky though and Del Rio grabs the armbreaker over the ropes to take over. We take a break and come back with Del Rio hitting the chinlock. A FEED ME MORE chant gets Ryback to his feet and a slingshot belly to back suplex breaks the hold.
The Warrior splash gets no cover for some reason but the middle rope dropkick gets Ryback two. He’s getting better at that move. The Meathook misses and Del Rio grabs a German suplex for two of his own. Ryback loads up the Shell Shock but here’s the League (including Barrett) for a distraction. Del Rio grabs the armbreaker for the submission at 10:37.
Rating: C-. This was the same standard trading of spots that we’ve seen from these two for weeks if not months now. Ryback vs. the League could be interesting and gives both of them something to do. The League always came off like a midcard stable more than a big deal and a feud with Ryback and friends would seem a lot more up their alley.
The League beats Ryback down post match.
Summer Rae is doing Tyler Breeze’s hair as he talks about facing Titus Uggo Neil later. Titus is going to need those millions of dollars for reconstructive surgery on his face. For some reason Goldust is watching and sneaks up on them. This is where Tyler has already fallen to? Summer sprays hairspray at Goldust to get him to leave.
Tyler Breeze vs. Titus O’Neil
Titus charges into raised boots to start as Lawler asks Summer for a grape. Breeze hammers away in the corner and here’s Goldust to take pictures with Summer against her will. Titus comes back with a big boot to the face followed by the throwaway slam. Lawler declares hijinks in the VIP section as Goldust gets up for a picture with Tyler. The Clash of the Titus gives O’Neil the pin at 2:51.
We look at Kevin Owens beating up Dean Ambrose and Dolph Ziggler on Monday.
Ambrose doesn’t think much of Owens’ plans to put him in an asylum in order to get the Intercontinental Title back. Owens can powerbomb him as many times as he wants because Ambrose will scrape himself up and mail himself to Owens for another fight. Being Intercontinental Champion means being willing to fight every day of the year and Owens is going to need a better plan than to drive Dean crazy.
Stills of the tables match on Sunday and the extreme rules match on Monday.
Bray Wyatt talks about going to the extreme not being enough. Harper says pain is temporary but fear lasts forever. Rowan talks about how you can search for the light but all you’ll find is darkness. Strowman finds solace in the muffled screams of those who take their last breaths in his arm. The Family doesn’t obey this world’s rules so sleep with one eye open and know that they are everywhere. They cannot stop so run.
New Day vs. Lucha Dragons
Non-title with Big E. on the floor. Before the match, Woods and Big E. blame jealousy for the Usos and Dragons’ denial of friendship on Monday. We get a unicorn horn and Kofi declares themselves fashion icons. The celebration from Sunday are for them and them alone though, which the fans just don’t seem to get.
Woods and Kalisto get things going with the masked man armdragging Woods to the mat. Cara slams Kalisto onto Woods and it’s time to work on the arm. Big E. is giving Booker lines to read to praise New Day, referring to them by such monikers as the gaggle of groove. Cara monkey flips Kalisto into the 450 as this is very one sided so far. Woods finally forearms Kalisto out to the floor and we take a quick break.
Back with the Unicorn Stampede on Kalisto as Big E. can’t play the trombone. A slingshot stomp gets two for Kofi and he slows things down by cranking on Kalisto’s arms. As Lawler talks about Woods’ boots being curled up like the Iron Sheik’s, Kalisto gets two off a middle rope cross body. Big E. breaks up the hot tag though and it’s time for everyone to dance. Cara uses the distraction to knock Woods off the apron and onto Big E., allowing Kalisto to roll up a shocked Kofi for the pin at 11:44.
Rating: C. Mostly standard formula tag match here which is all you need more often than not. It makes sense to have the Dragons and the Usos gets individual title shots now but I’m still from the generation where you have singles matches to build up to a big multi-team gimmick match. Not in modern wrestling though, but at least this match was fine.
Ziggler talks about being collateral damage for years now and how sick he is of everyone treating him like the guy who keeps getting so close but never pulls it off. No one can follow him though because he gives it everything he’s got every single night. Owens will learn that tonight. I’d buy this if I hadn’t heard it a dozen times.
Brie Bella vs. Becky Lynch
Another Twitter feud due to Brie yelling at Becky for getting a submission on Monday due to Ric Flair interfering. I still have no idea if Brie is a face or a heel. Team BAD is in the front row again, having bought tickets to watch one match and then leave like so many other fans do. The fans want Sasha as Becky gets kicked to the floor to start. We hit a chinlock on Becky but here’s Charlotte to cheer her on. The middle rope dropkick sets up the BRIE MODE knee for a near fall. The Bella Buster is broken up and Charlotte trips Brie down (with Becky seeing her), setting up the Disarm-Her for the tap at 2:40.
After a break, Becky isn’t happy with the way they’re winning lately. Becky thinks Charlotte believes Becky can’t win without her.
Kevin Owens doesn’t care about Ziggler wanting revenge because he wants his Intercontinental Title back. Just like the cockroach that he is, Ambrose can survive almost anything but he can’t survive Kevin Owens. As for Ziggler, instead of going to an asylum, he’s going to the hospital tonight.
New Day will defend against the Lucha Dragons on Tuesday’s live Smackdown.
Dolph Ziggler vs. Kevin Owens
Owens stomps him down and throws him out of the corner for early control. An elbow drops Ziggler again and they head outside where Ziggler sends him into the barricade. Back from a break with Owens slapping on a chinlock and demanding that the referee ASK HIM. The backsplash gets two and we hit a chinlock with a knee in Ziggler’s back. As usual, the announcers keep calling Owens a prize fighter, suggesting that he’s not doing the same thing as EVERYONE ELSE IN THE COMPANY.
Back up and Ziggler avoids a shoulder in the corner, sending Owens into the post. Dolph makes his comeback with the exact same stuff he always makes his comeback with until Owens gets two off a belly to belly. A German suplex and the Cannonball get two each on Ziggler but he holds the ropes to avoid the Pop Up Powerbomb. The superkick gets two on Owens (with a nice delay between two and three) but he backdrops Dolph out to the floor for a nice crash. Ziggler is holding his shoulder so Owens throws him over the announcers’ table for the DQ at 13:20.
Rating: C+. This was more storyline advancement than a match which is a good idea this early into Owens’ new character. I’m liking the idea of Owens being all violent and beating people up until he gets his title back. Basically you build him up as an unstoppable monster who runs over everyone until the one that got away is the only one left. Simple story that’s going to work every time.
Ziggler fights back but gets shoved into the steps. Ambrose runs out for the save and Owens runs from the threat of Dirty Deeds, only to superkick Ziggler for a consolation prize. Ambrose tries to help Dolph up and eats a superkick of his own. Owens smiles at everything to end the show.
Overall Rating: C. Totally run of the mill Smackdown here with watchable wrestling and some story advancement. At least this is the last one for a little while as we have the live show on Tuesday and probably something special for New Year’s Eve, followed by the USA debut. As for this show though, if they actually take Roman off the air and don’t have him do guerrilla style attacks or something like that, I’ve lost the little hope this company gave me in the past week. They couldn’t be that stupid. Like, they couldn’t be.
Results
Alberto Del Rio b. Ryback – Cross armbreaker
Titus O’Neil b. Tyler Breeze – Clash of the Titus
Lucha Dragons b. New Day – Rollup to Kingston
Becky Lynch b. Brie Bella – Disarm-Her
Dolph Ziggler b. Kevin Owens via DQ when Owens threw him over the announcers’ table
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of Wrestlemania at Amazon for just $3.99 at:
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Monday Night Raw – December 14, 2015: They Really Just Did That!
Monday
Date: December 14, 2015
Location: Wells Fargo Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Michael Cole, Byron Saxton, John Bradshaw Layfield
Now this could be a very interesting show. Last night Roman Reigns finally showed the fire he’s been needing for years and destroyed the League of Nations as well as HHH. This starts the road to the Royal Rumble but there is almost no way to predict how a Philadelphia crowd is going to react. Let’s get to it.
We open with a recap of last night’s main event and Reigns’ post match attacks.
Here’s a ticked off Stephanie McMahon to open things. She talks about how badly businesswomen are perceived. Take away her money and her education and she’s just like you. Last night she had to explain to her daughters why their daddy was beaten up and spitting blood in the hospital last night. It’s obvious the fans want her to be cold hearted and vindictive so that’s what they’re going to get.
This brings out Roman, who says it’s his daughter’s birthday and he can’t wait to see her when he gets home. Stephanie asks how Reigns can say that when her husband is so hurt. Reigns says he’s got stuff to do so fire him or move on. The boss yells about how Reigns failed again last night as he always does because he’s a disgrace and a failure. Roman disagrees because it’s really Stephanie and HHH that are the disgraces. Make that the entire McMahon Family, so Stephanie slaps him about ten times. She won’t fire him because her husband asked him not to. Vince might though, because he’s on the way tonight.
Dean Ambrose vs. Dolph Ziggler
Non-title and I believe the fourth straight show where Ziggler has been in the match after the opening segment. Dean wristlocks him down to start and gets two off a slam. We hit a Regal Stretch of all things on Ziggler before Dean sends him to the floor for a suicide dive. This has been one sided so far. Back in and we hit a pinfall reversal sequence until Dirty Deeds doesn’t work to send us to a stalemate as we take a break.
Back with Ziggler taking over by dropkicking Ambrose out of the air, followed by the Fameasser for two. Dean grabs a belly to back suplex into a faceplant for two of his own and now the fans think this is awesome. Oh come on you far too quickly impressed people. It’s not that great. Dean misses a charge into the corner and eats the superkick, only to hit the rebound lariat before going down. This brings in Kevin Owens to throw Ziggler outside for the DQ at 12:21.
Rating: C+. Way too happy fans aside, this was a smart way to go for the first match on a show in Philadelphia. There’s a group of wrestlers that they’re going to cheer no matter what and these two are near the top. The match was good enough despite being little more than a bunch of spots going back and forth.
Owens powerbombs Dean twice and holds up the title. Ziggler tries to come in but gets kicked in the knee, followed by a powerbomb onto Dean as Owens stands over both of them.
We look at Stephanie slapping Reigns again. They’re making it very difficult for me to keep calm tonight.
Owens says he doesn’t have to justify himself to anyone because that was just the beginning. He isn’t going to stop until he drives Dean into an institution and takes back HIS Intercontinental Title.
The ECW guys are getting ready for their extreme rules match against the Wyatts. If this city has taught Bubba one thing it’s that you have to keep getting back up.
Stephanie is waiting on Vince.
R-Truth vs. Bo Dallas
O…..k? Truth shoulders him down and takes a victory lap early on. As the match is going on, we cut to the back where Vince arrives. It has been WAY too long since something has happened during a match on this show. We cut back to the ring where Dallas and Truth look terrified. Truth snapmares him down and here’s Vince while the match is still going on. Everything stops and Vince gets in the ring to tell both guys to get out of his ring, drawing one of the pops of the night. The match ended at 3:27 but no rating of course.
Vince talks about Reigns sweating in the back because he might get fired. That’s enough for now though as he goes and sits at ringside, saying Roman is going to sweat a bit more. After a break, Vince calls Reigns down to the ring to take his medicine. Reigns comes out (down the ramp for a change) and Vince demands an apology for what Roman did to HHH last night. Roman smirks a bit so Vince threatens to beat him up right now. There goes the jacket but here’s Sheamus to interrupt before it goes any further.
Sheamus wants to be the one that beats an apology out of Reigns but the fans cut him off with the YOU LOOK STUPID chant. On behalf of Vince’s Irish coat of arms, Sheamus wants to challenge Reigns for tonight. Sheamus knows he can beat Reigns at any time, so let’s make it a title match. Vince asks the fans if they’re interested but there’s no chance that’s happening. Reigns wants to know why not and thinks it’s because the old man’s grapefruits have shriveled to prunes. That’s too far for Vince so it’s on for tonight. However, if Reigns doesn’t become champion, he’s fired. Vince kicks Reigns low and leaves.
Alberto Del Rio/Rusev vs. Ryback/Jack Swagger
Lana is actually at ringside during a League match for a change. Ryback starts fast with the delayed vertical suplex for two on Rusev. It’s off to Del Rio for some kicks in the corner and Ryback stands perfectly still as Alberto runs across the ring for the enziguri. Some stomping sets up a chinlock from Alberto as the fans are really not interested here. It’s hard to bore a Philadelphia crowd but they’ve managed to pull it off.
The fans try a WE THE PEOPLE chant and Ryback responds with a suplex to Rusev, setting up the hot tag to Swagger. Jack makes the comeback with his usual and gets Rusev in the Patriot Lock, only to get caught in a Backstabber. Ryback gets thrown out and back to back superkicks give Rusev the pin on Swagger at 6:35.
Rating: D+. Just a quick match here (thank goodness) and the League continues to be a lame group that is effective yet boring. At least Swagger took the fall here instead of Ryback, who can’t take too many more falls before he loses any credibility he might have built up over the summer. Well any more of it that is as most of it is already gone.
The Rosebush talks about the Charlotte/Becky Lynch situation and Tommy Dreamer being offended by Rose saying he spray tanned. Apparently Dreamer’s skin is as thin as his hair.
Tyler Breeze vs. Neville
I’m off to watch one of their great NXT showdowns instead of this likely nothing match. Before we start, here’s Miz to direct the match and call for the bell. Neville works on a headlock to start as Miz tells him to crank on the head. We hit a chinlock instead until Breeze comes back with some stomps as we keep cutting to Miz. Tyler puts on his own front facelock as Miz tries to lead some Neville chants. Neville fights up again and nails a great looking (and sounding) superkick, setting up the Red Arrow for the pin at 4:55.
Rating: C-. This wasn’t bad but is clearly part of a longer story. Miz and Neville are an intriguing pair as they both need something to do so why not try something new? Speaking of something new, how about WE STOP JOBBING BREEZE??? Did they really just need a new midcard jobber and that’s the only reason they called him up? That’s the best they can do for someone that worked that hard in NXT? What a shame indeed.
Neville is getting annoyed at Miz after a break but Miz suggests that Neville could be a superhero in the next Star Wars movie. However, he needs Neville to teach him his accent so he can be the next James Bond. Neville still isn’t interested and walks off.
The Wyatts promise to bury the ECW guys.
Wyatt Family vs. Tommy Dreamer/Rhyno/Dudley Boyz
Extreme rules. The Wyatts surround the ECW guys to start as JBL acts like ECW was the greatest thing of all time. Bubba and Dreamer lead the house cleaning and it’s time for some weapons. Back in and the Dudleys give Rowan What’s Up but Harper comes in for a save with the superkick. Dreamer hits him with a few hard objects and loads up a superplex, only to have Strowman pull him to the floor. Bubba completes the superplex but Rowan makes it a Tower of Doom sending Harper down onto the chair as we take a break.
Back with the Wyatts in control until Rhyno cleans house. Dreamer gets to do the baseball slide into the dropkick in the Tree of Woe on Harper and Bray is knocked into the crowd. Strowman gets thrown over the announcers’ table and Bubba follows Bray into the crowd. Harper is on the stage with Dreamer but his powerbomb is countered into a Death Valley Driver through a pair of conveniently placed tables. Strowman helps Bray against Bubba until Dreamer makes the save with a kendo stick. That’s fine with Strowman who powerslams Dreamer through part of the barricade.
Bubba beats Bray up near the announcers’ table and throws the cover on him. Back in the ring (finally) and the Dudleys beat up Harper until Luke fights them off with relative ease and loads up a table. Bubba runs back in for 3D but Bray makes the save and gives D-Von Sister Abigail on the floor. Rowan returns with a spinwheel kick to Bubba but Rhyno suplexes him down. The Gore hits knee though and Sister Abigail plants Rhyno. Rowan loads up a table and a top rope splash sends Rhyno through the wood for the pin at 15:33.
Rating: B. This was WAY more fun than it had any right to be and thank goodness the right team won. They had me believing that the ECW guys were going to win here and riots would have been justified. Instead this was much more of a treat for the live crowd and a pretty fun match for the most part, especially seeing Tommy Dreamer in pain. Good stuff and a really fun surprise.
We recap the Reigns story for the night.
Here’s New Day for their latest celebration. Big E. and Kofi are limping after last night and Woods says they’re not in a mood to party for once. We see some stills of the bigger crashes and the fans cut Kofi off with a NEW DAY ROCKS chant. Kofi is so messed up that he couldn’t even do the full skip clap on the way to the ring. They invite the Usos to the ring and Woods gets right to the point by saying the Usos have earned New Day’s respect.
A truce is offered but the twins aren’t buying it. Instead Big E. asks the Lucha Dragons to come out here as well. Kofi praises Sin and says the Dragons are his son’s favorite tag team. Kalisto calls that a really nice speech but asks about Woods throwing his trombone at him for a save. Xavier can’t change the past but last night these three teams took the tag division to a new level and it was for the fans.
Again the handshake is offered and this time they’re actually accepted. The four of them leave and Woods insists that they were being sincere, but tonight it’s ALL ABOUT THE NEW DAY! It’s time to dance so the Usos and Dragons come out to beat them up. That’s really heelish of them (though it won’t be considered as such) after they lost last night in a No DQ match and New Day really didn’t do anything bad tonight.
Brie Bella/Alicia Fox vs. Becky Lynch/Charlotte
Team BAD is in the front row and Ric Flair is with his daughter. Brie avoids a Charlotte charge in the corner to start and sends the champ head first into the buckle. We hit a very early chinlock followed by the YES Kicks for two. Charlotte gets over for the tag to Becky and everything breaks down. With the referee distracted, Ric trips Alicia and Becky grabs the Disarm-Her for the submission at 4:26.
Rating: D. I have no idea who I’m supposed to cheer and who I’m supposed to boo. So Becky knew that Charlotte cheated to retain last night but is still friends with her after Charlotte blew her off last night. Then Charlotte’s dad cheats instead of Charlotte to pin Alicia, who was doing the Daniel Bryan kicks for a guaranteed face reaction despite being a heel (I think?) at the moment. This division MAKES NO SENSE. Oh and did Team BAD do anything to warrant being at ringside?
The Prime Time Players shill merchandise for Christmas.
We look back at last night’s main event.
Vince talks to the League of Nations, again minus Barrett.
WWE World Title: Sheamus vs. Roman Reigns
Sheamus is defending, Roman is fired if he doesn’t win the title and Vince is at ringside. Reigns takes him right to the corner for the clotheslines and the fans are behind him for a change. A quick Regal Roll sends Reigns outside and Sheamus slams him onto the table as we take a break. Back with Reigns fighting out of a chinlock and suplexing Sheamus for a breather.
Sheamus sends him to the apron but Reigns snaps the throat across the top and hits the apron boot. A Samoan drop is broken up so Roman just takes him to the middle rope for a bigger drop. The Irish Curse gets two so Reigns lifts Sheamus up for two off a powerbomb. Sheamus slams him down in turn and puts on the Cloverleaf (Not the Texas Cloverleaf but rather the old Edgecator. That’s a bad name.), sending Roman over to the ropes.
The fans are still cheering for Roman and a Superman punch knocks Sheamus silly. Vince pulls the referee out at two though and Sheamus grabs White Noise for two. Dang they’re getting close on these kickouts. Vince grabs the referee and tells him something. Sheamus pushes Reigns to the floor and here comes the League with Rusev kicking (a bloody) Reigns in the head.
Back in and Sheamus ducks the Brogue and hits another Superman punch to the champ and one to knock Vince silly…..only to eat a Brogue Kick for a VERY near fall. This is AWESOME drama and the best stuff they’ve had since Rollins vs. Ziggler at last year’s Survivor Series. Sheamus loads up another Brogue and walks into a spear to give Reigns the title at 16:55!
Rating: B. The wrestling is totally inconsequential here as they NAILED the drama and the story here. This was exactly what needed to happen for a long time now and Reigns is totally over with the fans, at least at the moment. I’m actually in shock here and the moment was exactly what it needed to be. Well done WWE, which I wouldn’t have believed I’d be saying a week ago.
The announcers put this over as a huge moment as Roman celebrates, including kicking Vince out to the floor. I do love the fact that the solution for Reigns was to make the show as bad as they possibly could so the fans would cheer him by default. It sounds bad but dang if it didn’t work. The show actually ends with Reigns as champion and no shenanigans.
Overall Rating: B+. This show had the most important thing a show can have and that is uncertainty. I didn’t know what was going to happen in the main event (or the extreme rules match for that matter) and that’s where they have you. The idea behind wrestling (most of the time at least) is that you shouldn’t be able to know what’s coming but you want to see what’s coming. That’s how I felt for the main event. I really didn’t know what was happening and I wanted to find out.
The energy was way up for this show and it made for the best week in months. It’s no classic or anything, but it addressed one of the biggest issues they’ve had a long time: going through the motions with almost nothing interesting happening. There’s a long way to go until we get to the Rumble but this was a big step in the right direction.
Results
Dolph Ziggler b. Dean Ambrose via DQ when Kevin Owens interfered
R-Truth vs. Bo Dallas went to a no contest when Vince McMahon stopped the match
Alberto Del Rio/Rusev b. Jack Swagger/Ryback – Superkick to Swagger
Neville b. Tyler Breeze – Red Arrow
Wyatt Family b. Dudley Boyz/Rhyno/Tommy Dreamer – Top rope splash through a table to Rhyno
Becky Lynch/Charlotte b. Alicia Fox/Brie Bella – Disarm-Her to Fox
Roman Reigns b. Sheamus – Spear
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of Wrestlemania at Amazon for just $3.99 at:
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And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:
Tables Ladders and Chairs 2015: Thank You Roman
Tables
Date: December 13, 2015
Location: TD Garden, Boston, Massachusetts
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler
We’ll close out the pay per view calendar with some good violence on one of the shows full of the shows full of gimmick matches. The main event in the namesake match is Sheamus defending his World Title against Roman Reigns in what should be a brutal fight between two power guys. Let’s get to it.
Pre-Show: Sasha Banks. vs. Becky Lynch
This would be another unannounced match because the Divas Revolution isn’t important enough to mention in advance. Sasha gets the huge hometown pop and we get a little 12 Days of Christmas from Team BAD, which they thankfully cover with the final verse. None of the lines are funny enough to mention but you have to expect that with something WWE thinks is amusing. This would be your nightly attempt to make Team BAD into the second New Day. You know, because when you look at Tamina, she just screams charisma.
They start fast with some nice rollup attempts until Lynch headscissors her down. Sasha doesn’t get high enough on a leapfrog and crashes down on her face but it’s not enough to get the Disarm-Her. The announcers talk about Paul Heyman praising Becky as she takes Sasha down with an armbar. Banks finally drives her into the corner and avoids a charge, setting up the double knees (I don’t remember the last time she got to use that) to the back.
We take a break and come back with Sasha nailing the Backstabber into the Bank Statement but Becky gets to her feel and eventually rolls out before the hold can go on full. They trade more rollups for two each until a Regal Cutter takes Lynch down for two more. A pumphandle suplex gets the same on Sasha and there’s the Disarm-Her. Cue Tamina for a distraction so Naomi can kick Becky in the chest, setting up the Bank Statement for the submisison at 11:41.
Rating: B-. This felt like an NXT match on the big stage which is how things are supposed to go. They were finally allowed to try some of their submission stuff instead of having the same Divas matches they always have, even with the Naomi and Tamina interference. I can’t wait for the day when Sasha is finally allowed to go on her own because this UNITY nonsense is really holding her down. Other than “we don’t have anything else for them to do”, why is she still stuck with Tamina and Naomi? Good match here though and hopefully a sign of things to come tonight.
The opening video is Reigns standing there while clips of his path through the tournament and Sheamus’ cash in play behind him. The video game themed promo? Nowhere to be seen. The simple yet effective Christmas present themed video that ended the pre-show? Not on here either because why be creative when you can be generic?
Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Lucha Dragons vs. New Day
Ladder match with New Day defending. I’m not sure why they’re going with their hottest match to open the show but at least the first fifteen minutes should rock. Before the match, Kofi asks Woods why there’s no special hair tonight but Xavier wasn’t about to waste a good hair day on Boston. With tonight’s win, they will secure their spot as the faces of the division because who else can do it? The Lucha Dragons are too small and the Usos sound like a disease. Woods sits in on commentary and we’re finally ready to go.
Kofi and Jimmy start fast with one ladder being slid inside and another being…..dropped back down to the floor. Back in and it’s a double springboard with Kofi and Kalisto landing on the ladder. A double save is made so the Dragons moonsault from the middle rope to take the champs down. The Usos are all alone so they load up a ladder but knock the Dragons off the apron instead of going up.
They throw the ladder onto the guys on the floor and dive on top of them as JBL loses his mind at how stupid that was. Kofi gets thrown to the floor but Big E. runs the ladder over as the champs take over again. We get the Unicorn Stampede to Jimmy with a ladder in between, meaning it’s time for some tromboning. Jey’s save is countered with a belly to belly onto the ladder. The Dragons are back up but Big E. stops their ladder (upside down here) and drives them back into the corner. Kalisto gets smart and dives over the ladder to take Big E. down.
Cara rides the ladder down onto Kofi and takes out the Usos with a running Swanton over the top onto a ladder. The Dragons climb the ladder with Big E. underneath but he bench presses the ladder in an awesome display of strength. Kalisto dives onto the Usos again but they throw him down before dropkicking the ladder into Big E. in the corner. We get the mini ladder as Kofi breaks up a Superfly splash from Jimmy. Woods: “That’s what being a veteran ladder match haver can do for you!” Back up and Kofi gets caught in the Tree of Woe for a running Umaga Attack from Jimmy, leaving the twins all alone.
We get a big staredown between all the challengers with the Dragons taking over, including a monkey flip into the 450 to send Kalisto onto the ladder onto Jey. Woods: “WHY???” Kofi comes back in (with Woods saying it’s due to the rest building up his stamina like in WWE2K16) and wedges a ladder into the runs of a standing ladder.
That earns him a hurricanrana to send Kofi face first into the side of the ladder. Woods: “Our paintbrushes are fists and feet and you’re about to see Kofi do some fantastic art!” Back in and all four challengers climb up with Jey and Kalisto slugging it out on top. In the totally insane spot of the match, Kalisto gives Jey a Salida Del Sol over the top of the ladder and through the bridged ladder, sending Woods (and the crowd) into shock.
Somehow Kalisto isn’t dead and climbs up for a slugout with Jimmy but Big E. makes the save and stops Jimmy’s charge with a forearm (Woods: “LOOK AT THAT TRICEP MEAT!”) but a baseball slide into the ladder puts Big E. down again. Kalisto is all alone but Woods declares the match No DQ (in case there was any confusion beforehand) and hits Kalisto in the back with the trombone, allowing Kofi to retain the titles at 17:46.
Rating: A. Well that’s your match of the night by about a mile. That Salida Del Sol was absolutely nuts and one of the best spots they’ve done in years. I’m glad New Day retained because they’ve earned the right to keep the titles a bit longer, and maybe even a program with Enzo and Big Cass. Imagine the promos on that one.
We recap Rusev vs. Ryback, which is built around Rusev being all romantic with Lana and Ryback wanting to fight.
Ryback vs. Rusev
Rusev forearms him down to start and they quickly head outside with Ryback getting the better of it before taking Rusev back inside for a top rope ax handle. Some right hands in the corner set up a powerbomb from Rusev and it’s time to slowly stomp on the back. We hit the chinlock as Cole talks about Lana saving herself for marriage to Rusev. They fight over a suplex until Ryback takes over after about the tenth try, followed by a middle rope dropkick for two.
The Shell Shock is broken up so Ryback gets two off a high cross body instead. Points to him for trying some new stuff at least. Lana offers a distraction to break up the Meat Hook though and Rusev superkicks him down. Back in and the Accolade is broken up, only to have Rusev kick him in the head to get the hold on for the knockout at 7:56.
Rating: C-. I’m so tired of seeing either of these guys built up only to lose to another upper midcarder because they have no idea how to build up anyone else. The match was a decent enough power brawl but I have no idea how many more times they can go with the Lana injury idea before it gets even less interesting than it is now.
Reigns and Ambrose are ready for tonight and can’t wait to see Sheamus and Owens beaten down so they can walk out as double champions.
Quick recap of Alberto Del Rio vs. Jack Swagger which is mainly over Zeb Colter, who split with Del Rio on Monday.
US Title: Jack Swagger vs. Alberto Del Rio
Del Rio is defending and this is a chairs match. Both guys grab chairs to start and we get the early duel. That goes nowhere so they head outside to fight among the dozen or two chairs set up. Del Rio is sent into one face first time after time until he its Jack in the throat to take over.
A Backstabber gets two for the champ but Jack throws a chair at him. The Vader Bomb is blocked and the tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gets two for Del Rio. They head outside again with Alberto burying him under a pile of chairs and then throwing even more on top. Back in and the armbreaker is broken up with Swagger sending him shoulder first into the post for two more.
Swagger wraps a chair around the leg and puts on the Patriot Lock (meaning the chair doesn’t change anything) until Del Rio falls out to the floor. The powerslam sets up the Vader Bomb for another near fall. Jack throws in about ten chairs but Del Rio counters into the armbreaker over the ropes. A bunch of chair shots to the back sets up the top rope double stomp onto the chairs to retain the title at 11:19.
Rating: C. The match wasn’t bad but again this was such a mess with such an uninteresting story that there’s almost no way the match can be good. The finisher is still stupid, the chairs match gimmick is even worse (maybe) and the fans never bought the idea that Del Rio was going to lose. At least Colter wasn’t involved though.
We recap the ECW guys vs. the Wyatt Family. The Dudley Boyz were the Wyatts’ latest targets due to whatever bizarre reasons the Wyatts had this time (as usual they aren’t really clear). This meant the Dudleys had to bring in Tommy Dreamer and Rhyno to even things out, setting up an elimination tables match.
The ECW guys says they’ve seen it all over the years and now they’re here fighting one more time because hardcore is forever and age is just a number.
Dudley Boyz/Tommy Dreamer/Rhyno vs. Wyatt Family
The ECW guys go right at them to start and thankfully there are no tags. It’s already weapons time and the fight is quickly on the floor. We get a really bad looking sequence where Bubba puts a trashcan in front of his face so Strowman can punch it back at him. That was horrible. Strowman starts cleaning house until all four fight back. Rowan comes in and puts D-Von on a table but gets shoved off the top as the table breaks anyway. That’s not an elimination because it wasn’t an offensive move, which goes along with the rules these matches have had over the years.
3D puts Rowan through the table for an elimination but Bubba is clutching his knee. Bray and Harper come back in to take over as Bubba’s knee is good enough to go after Strowman on the floor. Rhyno suplexes Bray and Harper but Bray stops the Gore with a cross body. A big boot puts Rhyno through the table and we’re tied up again. Harper takes D-Von to the top but Bubba is back in to turn it into a Doomsday Device. Bubba goes after Strowman on the floor and D-Von gets another table, only to have Bray slam him through it for an elimination.
It’s down to Bray/Braun/Luke vs. Bubba/Dreamer. That means it’s time for kendo sticks and a cheese grater between Braun’s legs. Bubba and Dreamer bury him under a table for no apparent reason, leaving Harper to put Dreamer through a table with a suicide dive. Sister Abigail is broken up with some stick shots to the head and now it’s time for fire. Bubba covers a table with the fluid but Braun comes back in to chokeslam him through for the win at 12:30.
Rating: C+. This was fun enough and I can live with Rowan getting eliminated because no one cares about him in the first place. At least the Wyatts get a win and the jobbers did the job like they were supposed to. Hopefully this is almost it for Dreamer as he has little to offer outside of hardcore matches. Rhyno can do some good enough stuff on his own and might be worth keeping around, but they need to phase the ECW guys out again.
The pre-show panel recaps the show and throws us to the first Royal Rumble ad.
Intercontinental Title: Kevin Owens vs. Dean Ambrose
Owens is defending after Ambrose beat him in a non-title match last month and then won a triple threat match on Smackdown. That’s about it for the recap because there’s barely a story here. Before the match, Owens laughs at Boston fans for bragging about the success of their sports teams because none of them actually did anything in the first place. Dean might have thrown popcorn and soda in his face on Monday, but no matter what happens tonight, this is going to be the Kevin Owens Show.
Owens kicks him in the back to start so Dean punches him in the face. A belly to belly gets two for Owens and we hit the early chinlock. Dean fights up with a suplex but can’t hit Dirty Deeds. Instead it’s a clothesline to put Owens on the floor for a suicide dive. Owens pops right back up for a fall away slam and the backsplash on the floor, leaving Dean to dive back in at nine. Another backsplash hits knees but the top rope elbow is countered into a nice German suplex.
The Cannonball misses though and now the top rope elbow gets two. Dean’s superplex is countered into a middle rope Regal Roll and the kickout stuns Owens. The Pop Up Powerbomb is broken up and Dean grabs Dirty Deeds, only to have Owens touch the bottom rope for the break. Dean is stunned and walks into the Pop Up Powerbomb, only to counter into a hurricanrana for the pin and the title at 9:10. Lawler: “He’s going to be on cooking shows! He’s going to be on soap operas!”
Rating: B-. I wish they had let Owens keep going as champion but at least they FINALLY let Dean have something. This was treated as a big deal and could lead somewhere, assuming you believe the Intercontinental Title could actually mean something instead of being a title that is traded around every few months with no one getting anywhere as a result.
Dean celebrates quite a bit.
We recap Charlotte vs. Paige with Charlotte turning mostly heel and Paige not really turning anything new. Charlotte is embracing her inner Flair and Paige isn’t cool with that, setting up this title match.
Divas Title: Charlotte vs. Paige
Charlotte is defending and has her dad with her again. Paige knees her in the face to start and Charlotte hides behind her dad on the floor. Ric gets yelled at for a bit, allowing Charlotte to trip Paige as she comes back in and drop some more knees. We hit a front facelock on Paige as the fans aren’t thrilled with this so far. Paige’s sleeper attempt doesn’t go anywhere and it’s time for Charlotte to go after the knee. We see Team BAD, dressed as Team PCB for no logical reason, watching the match in the back.
Ric pulls off a turnbuckle pad but Charlotte doesn’t seem pleased. Paige uses the distraction to hit a running knee to the ribs and slap on her own Figure Four until Charlotte quickly rolls over. Back up and Charlotte hits a spinning top rope cross body, only to get caught in a fisherman’s suplex for two.
Something like a Rampaige from her knees gets two for the champ but the spear hits a knee to the face. Now the Rampaige connects on Charlotte but Ric pulls Paige’s leg under the ropes. Even JBL admits that this one happened. Charlotte uses the distraction to get the rest of the buckle pad off though and Paige goes face first to retain Charlotte’s title at 10:44.
Rating: C. As usual the psychology was way off here because they have no idea if Paige is a face or a heel. Charlotte is definitely doing better at the moment but Ric really needs to get out of here because the stories are becoming more about him than Charlotte, who actually needs the exposure. The match wasn’t bad but they needed some better focus.
After an ad for Kay Jewelers, Becky isn’t happy with what Charlotte did. Charlotte offers to make it like old times again but does the pinky swear with her dad instead and laughs at Becky.
Long recap of Sheamus vs. Roman Reigns, which is mostly about Sheamus cashing in his Money in the Bank last month and forming the League of Nations soon afterwards.
WWE World Title: Sheamus vs. Roman Reigns
TLC match with Sheamus defending. Sheamus charges into a right hand to start and Reigns pounds away on the mat. The fans are chanting for Cena early on, despite this being a pretty solid show so far. It’s almost like they’re never happy no matter what they’re given. They head outside with the champ being whipped over the barricade and into the timekeeper’s area.
The ladder is bridged between the announcers’ table and apron but Sheamus hits him in the back with a chair to get a breather. The fans think Sheamus looks stupid but at least it’s better than the Tater Tot chants. Instead of going for the title, they fight up the aisle with Sheamus going through a bunch of tables and chairs for a crash. Reigns takes too long though and Sheamus backdrops him through a table. Sheamus gets back inside for the first climb but has to come back down to throw a ladder at Reigns.
The apron kick is countered by another shot to the face and a big White Noise puts Reigns through a table. They finally get back in with Reigns taking another ladder to the back but of course he’s still able to powerbomb Sheamus onto the ladder. Reigns knocks him back to the floor and hits something like a Superman punch off the steps with a chair to the head. Back in again and the regular Superman punch is countered into the Irish Curse as the fans just do not care. Like it’s disturbing how little they care here.
The fans chant for NXT as Reigns powers out of the ten forearms to the chest for a Samoan drop through the bridged ladder (clearly made of wood). That gets the fans back but they boo Reigns out of the building as he climbs again. JBL asks if Reigns is finally going to do it, basically admitting that the five minute title reign means nothing. A quick Superman punch drops Sheamus again but he pulls Reigns down again. Now it’s Sheamus going up but Roman nails another Superman punch off the ladder (cool spot) to knock Reigns through a table.
Reigns goes up and here are Rusev and Del Rio for the save. You knew that was coming sooner or later. Rusev takes him to the floor for the Accolade but Reigns fights out again and Superman punches both guys, only to eat a Brogue Kick from Sheamus. We get the slow climb and Reigns is back again, only to have Sheamus pull the title down and kill the crowd even deader than they already were at 24:00.
Rating: B. The match was fun but we all knew what was coming at the end and there was no way around it. I’m not even going to bother going on a rant about how stupid this is because there’s nothing left to say about it. This story and feud is horrible and it just keeps going because we need the PERFECT moment to put the title on Reigns permanently. What WWE doesn’t seem to realize (or acknowledge because I can’t believe they’re this dumb) is that the moment has already passed multiple times and the Reigns chance is gone.
The League (minus Barrett, who must be busy tonight), poses until Reigns spears them all down and beats them up with a chair. Reigns isn’t done yet (like, he won’t even listen to Stephanie shouting STOP!) and powerbombs HHH onto (not through) the announcers’ table. That sums up Reigns’ career so perfectly. An elbow puts HHH through the table as the announcers freak out that someone could touch the boss. Fans: “THANK YOU ROMAN!” HHH is helped out but Reigns runs back to ringside and spears HHH down to finally end the show.
This worked for many reasons, but there’s one at the top of the list: emotion. Instead of going by what the script says which may or may not make sense, there was a logical progression of Reigns being pushed to his limit too many times and FINALLY snapping like a 6’4 gladiator would do if he kept dealing with stuff like this. Stuff like that is always going to work and it did here. Of course there are still a dozen problems with the show and this doesn’t solve most of them but it was a cool moment.
Overall Rating: B-. This was a very back and forth show with the opener obviously being the high point but the rest was like a boat that was trying to get through a bad storm. It had some good moments and there was definitely more good than bad but the main event was just death due to the horrible build. The violence and carnage carried things as it almost does but they still need a lot of changes. This worked for one night though which is a lot more than you can say most of the time.
Results
New Day b. Lucha Dragons and Usos – Kingston pulled down the titles
Rusev b. Ryback – Accolade
Alberto Del Rio b. Jack Swagger – Top rope double stomp onto a pile of chairs
Wyatt Family b. Dudley Boyz/Tommy Dreamer/Rhyno last eliminating Bubba Ray
Dean Ambrose b. Kevin Owens – Hurricanrana
Charlotte b. Paige – Pin after Paige was sent into the exposed turnbuckle
Sheamus b. Roman Reigns – Sheamus pulled down the title
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Reviewing the Review: Monday Night Raw – December 7, 2015
Let’s
The show opened with the League of Nations talking about how they were going to take care of Reigns and pals on Sunday. This brought out the Wyatt Family and I was immediately interested. They said they were here for the chaos and a brawl was teased, which could have made things a lot more interesting with the Wyatts moving up to the main event and possibly turning face, meaning we could drop this ECW reunion idea that has been done a doze times.
But no, because that might be too interesting. No instead we got the ECW guys coming out again (with Rhyno coming in to even things up), only to be joined by Reigns and company. This opened up some new dynamics for where the teams could go and the promos could have been interesting.
But no, instead of letting them talk or build up ANYTHING, the match was joined in progress when we got back with everyone in the match at once. Why bother with building something up when you can just give us everything right now and leave nothing to look forward to later tonight? Dreamed pinned Rowan, Sheamus Brogue Kicked Bubba and Reigns speared Sheamus to win, because SCREW YOU World Champion, you need to lose to Reigns like everyone else.
Much like the rest of this show, this was pretty good wrestling with a big middle finger to the fans at the same time. You’re excited about the Wyatts moving up the card again after seeing them get knocked down for the last year and a half? HAHA too bad because you’re getting the ECW reunion instead. You want to see Reigns actually deal with some issues? HAHA too bad because he beat the League on his own last week and then his team beats them here. Don’t worry though because he’ll lose another title shot on Sunday, which is supposed to erase all of Sheamus’ losing over the last few weeks and months.
Instead of trying to give the fans something they’re interested in, WWE is obsessed with just plowing ahead with their back and forth booking that doesn’t get anyone anywhere and that the fans reject more and more every single week. Teasing the Wyatts in the main event scene as faces (an idea the fans LOVED) and then pulling the string on it again is even worse than just leaving it as is. It continues to show that WWE knows what we want to see but would rather go with whatever nonsense they have instead because THAT’S WHAT WE’RE GETTING NO MATTER WHAT.
We’re long past the point where WWE needs to keep teasing something. At this point the show and the company are ice cold and desperate for something to fire it up. Maybe that’s the Wyatts in a face run or whatever, but putting them out there and then having them lose to the ECW guys while Sheamus loses AGAIN before retaining AGAIN on Sunday isn’t the solution, which WWE still doesn’t seem to get. I don’t know when something is going to change, but it’s going to be a long road to the Royal Rumble is that’s when we can finally expect a change.
Stardust and Titus O’Neil did their weekly thing. Again, I’ve stopped caring about this until it actually goes somewhere.
In another good match that did little to advance anything, Kevin Owens pinned Dolph Ziggler, who then pinned Tyler Breeze on Smackdown. So we have Owens coming off looking good while Ziggler is still a loser but Breeze, the young guy who came in hot, looks like even more of a loser because he has to trade wins with DOLPH ZIGGLER. Dolph has been around forever and has lost to almost everyone but Breeze has to lose a series to him because he has to pay main roster dues or something because toiling in NXT for years doesn’t count.
It doesn’t help that this is right around the same time that HHH said on a conference call that they don’t bring up people from NXT without a plan for them. WHAT WAS THE PLAN FOR BREEZE THEN??? The ONLY thing he’s done is continue the Summer Rae story despite there not even being a story there anymore. Is that what they’re going to claim the plan was? If so, we might have set a new benchmark for stupidest line/biggest lie the company has told.
Breeze came up from NXT and is already floundering because they didn’t have anything for him to do and now he’s stuck looking like a loser who loses to the jobber to the stars. Now am I supposed to buy him as a midcard threat? He has no story and a losing record, but I’m supposed to care about him? WWE has made it clear over the years that Ziggler isn’t going anywhere long term (they had him beat the Authority and gave him the Sting rub and he was right back where he was two months later) and now they’re putting him over Breeze? Why? Who does this help? Certainly not the fans as I’m sure you’ve figured out already.
Oh and then Dean Ambrose came out and threw a Coke in Owens’ face because Dean is WILD AND CRAZY. I’m sure Owens retains on Sunday though because he needs to get his win back after Ambrose beat him at Survivor Series and we need to make sure no one looks stronger than anyone else.
Donny Deutsch seemed to end the Miz/Neville story by offering Neville a spot on his new sitcom. Well that’s better than turning Neville heel at least.
Team BAD beat Team Bella because THIS IS STILL A THING. We’re stuck with Charlotte and Paige trying to figure out which one we’re supposed to cheer (more on that later) while Sasha, the most over woman in the division because she tore the house down with Bayley time after time is stuck shouting UNITY with Tamina and Naomi. Yes Naomi, who they’re STILL not doing anything with other than HAVING FUN MAGGLE because she uses the Rear View.
This was yet another five minute match that had nothing interesting, nothing going anywhere, the Bellas having no idea if they’re good or bad, and Sasha being wasted. Charlotte vs. Paige is fine, but the fans want to see Sasha, who could be swapped in for either of the two Divas fighting over the title without missing a beat. Oh but she doesn’t have Ric Flair so that’s out of the question.
New Day came out and did their comedy thing before doing the champions losing thing. Yeah this time it was to the Lucha Dragons to set up the ladder match on Sunday because there was NO OTHER WAY to do this than have the champions lose. Having the Usos vs. the Dragons in a show stealer with the New Day interfering for a no contest so everyone looked equal was totally off the table of course.
MizTV had Charlotte, Ric Flair and Paige as guests. Charlotte is now doing her entitles better than you character from NXT which is what got her over in the first place. Unfortunately no one has any idea if Paige is going to be the heel in this feud or not, despite her doing the whole Reid Flair promo. As usual, the match will be ok if they’re allowed to tear it up but for some reason we’re likely going to have the focus on Ric, just as it always is. It’s another idea that could go somewhere but since they can’t just figure something out, we’re still sitting through a lot of wheel spinning.
Ryback and Rusev’s rematch went to a double countout when Lana was run over again. Here’s this whole feud in a nutshell: Rusev loves Lana, Lana keeps getting hurt and Ryback is fighting Rusev because the script says he’s supposed to. That’s the kind of idea that worked in the Muppet Movie, not on a wrestling show that we’re supposed to buy as real (or as real as it can be in modern wrestling). This is yet another story that is ice cold and has no one behind it because they’ve pulled the rug from under Ryback so many times that it’s almost impossible to get behind him again.
Jack Swagger beat Stardust in a quick match which was only there to allow the split between Zeb Colter and Alberto as well as to set up the chairs match stipulation on Sunday. I don’t think anyone is going to miss Zeb and Alberto as a team but I’m also hoping this doesn’t lead to Zeb and Swagger reuniting. Much like Ziggler, Swagger is such damaged goods that it would be a waste of Colter’s talents when he could build up someone fresh for a change.
Braun Strowman squashed Tommy Dreamer just like you would expect him to. You can forget about the Wyatts vs. the League. That really was just a tease at the start of the show.
Then we get to the part of the show that people remember the most. Roman Reigns came out to challenge Sheamus and the champion followed, only to take forever saying that he wouldn’t get in until the weapons were out. By that I mean he talked about EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM. They finally started fighting and the whole thing took twenty minutes, capped off by a spear to put Sheamus through a table to end the show.
For once, and I emphasize FOR ONCE, this wasn’t on Sheamus and Reigns. Austin and Rock at their best would have had trouble getting this segment over. Either that or they would have said screw it and started doing something entertaining instead. It was long and stupid with Sheamus still looking like a coward while Reigns still doesn’t give me a reason to care about him.
The fans were walking out on the segment and I certainly can’t blame them. How was this supposed to make me want to see the match on Sunday? Yeah instead of actually fighting, let’s stand around while they TALK! I can’t remember the last time I saw an episode end this badly, but the worst part is WWE doesn’t seem to understand why it was bad. You had a big match earlier in the show but instead of doing that, they ran with it in the first thirty minutes in a failed attempt to keep the fans away from Monday Night Football. I don’t know who thought this main event was a good idea but they need to be fired, because this was horrible.
This was a show that felt a lot more fun live, but looking back on it there are so many major holes in what they were doing. WWE is in desperate need of a new direction and we’re not going to get it anytime soon. Instead we’re stuck sitting here watching another heel champion run away like a coward while Reigns is STILL waiting on his big moment (which he probably gets at Wrestlemania in a rematch with Lesnar that won’t work).
They need to figure this stuff out and give us something to cheer for already. Maybe that’s John Cena, but something needs to happen before the end of the year because I’m terrified of how low things could get before then. Raw was bad this week, but not bad in the traditional sense. This was bad in the “why am I wasting my time on this” sense, which is the worst thing they can do.
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Smackdown – December 10, 2015: Waste Of My Time
Smackdown
Date:
Location: Jacksonville Veterans Memorial Coliseum, Jacksonville, Florida
Commentators: Rich Brennan, Jerry Lawler, Booker T.
It’s the go home show for Tables Ladders and Chairs and the show isn’t looking like the most interesting in the world. Most of the card is set though and that means tonight is all about the build. I have a feeling we’ll be seeing more about the main event, which is a bit of a shame as Smackdown was getting good about building up the midcard. Let’s get to it.
Opening sequence.
Roman Reigns vs. Alberto Del Rio
Non-title because I don’t think Del Rio has defended the thing since he won it. Swagger vs. Del Rio on Sunday is officially a chairs match. The rest of the League, Ambrose and the Usos are at ringside. Del Rio takes him into the corner for a kick to the back to start but Reigns pounds him in the head. Alberto comes back with some kicks and a way too early chinlock (Sheamus: “SQUEEZE THE LIFE OUT OF HIM!”). That doesn’t exactly work as Reigns fights up, only to be greeted by what sounded like a Y2J chant.
Reigns takes it to the floor but gets in a staredown with Sheamus, allowing Del Rio to kick him in the ribs as we take a break. Back with Del Rio coming off the top with a right hand to the head for two. With the everything else not working, Del Rio puts on the armbreaker over the top rope for all of four seconds until Reigns powers him off the ropes and out to the floor. As usual, I don’t know why I’m supposed to cheer for Reigns when he can do anything. Well aside from get the ratings up that is.
Reigns wins a slugout (duh) and fires off the clotheslines in the corner. The Superman Punch is countered into the Backstabber for two but Reigns does his rollup into a powerbomb for two. A Sheamus distraction lets Del Rio get in the enziguri for two of his own but there’s the Superman Punch for two with the League pulling Del Rio away. The big brawl is on and it’s a double DQ at 14:38.
Rating: C+. They work well together but as usual this was an obvious ending and not for the title because Reigns is programmed for the World Title and therefore doesn’t care about the US Title. It’s the same, standard operating procedure stuff and I’m getting really tired of it, as are most of the fans it seems.
There’s going to be an eight man tag main event. That’s not all though as we also get a CONTRACT SIGNING between Ambrose and Kevin Owens. Good grief this is like a Greatest Hits Smackdown.
Tyler Breeze vs. Dolph Ziggler
Speaking of the exact same things we’ve seen time after time, here’s Dolph Ziggler in the second segment of the show for I think the third show in a row. Oh and it’s in a rematch too because this was screaming for a trilogy. They fight over arm control to start until Tyler grabs a headlock. A nice running dropkick gets two for Breeze and he starts in on the leg.
Ziggler tries to roll out of a knee bar but gets caught in a half crab instead. With that broken up, Breeze tries to wrap the leg around the post but gets pulled face first into the steel instead (with no mention of this from the commentators because Lawler is reading a line about selfies). Back in and the superkick ends Breeze at 4:44. That was Ziggler’s only major offensive move of the match.
Rating: D+. So let’s see. Breeze arrived about a month and a half ago and already has a losing record in general and to Dolph Ziggler. I’m so glad we saw him go through all that work down in NXT, only to have him come up here and lose a feud to the perennial jobber to the stars, who TOTALLY needed to win this feud. As usual, it’s the same old things that we’ve seen for years that don’t work but they keep doing because they’re sure it’s a brilliant idea.
We recap Ryback vs. Rusev. I’m assuming they’ll fight on Sunday.
Here’s New Day and since it’s Smackdown, this is probably their only appearance for the night. Before their match, Kofi talks about LeBron James just signed a lifetime deal with Nike. Big E.: “Lifetime? As in like it and put a ring on it?” Kofi shows off his shoes as E. gives us a quick commercial. As for Sunday, they’re defending their titles in a triple threat ladder match, but getting the belts off of them is harder than getting Adele to answer a phone call. Why you ask? It’s because NEW DAY ROCKS of course.
New Day vs. Lucha Dragons
Again non-title and a rematch from Raw, though this time it’s Big E. on the floor. Kalisto flips Kofi down to start but both guys try a dropkick to give us a stalemate. The Dragons take over again with Cara monkey flipping Kalisto onto Kofi for two. New Day finally gets it together with Kofi sending Cara to the floor as we take a break. Back with Woods stomping in the corner and Big E. not being able to master the trombone.
We get an awkward sequence where Woods misses a clothesline and then hits it a second later with Cara standing there so he can hit it. Cara lifts Kofi up into a powerbomb (ala Reigns), finally allowing the hot tag to Kalisto as things speed way up. The hurricanrana driver gets two with Kofi making the save. When that doesn’t work, Kalisto kicks Xavier in the head and hits the Salida Del Sol for the pin at 8:14.
Rating: C-. This didn’t have much time due to the break and was another rematch from Raw. Just like with Owens in the Intercontinental Title feud, the Usos have been completely forgotten in this whole thing and should have been in this match instead of the rematch with the Dragons where New Day loses AGAIN. In other words, they’re using the same idea in the Tag Team Title feud that they’re doing in the World Title feud. And people wonder why this isn’t the most well received time in creative’s history.
It’s time for the contract signing for Owens vs. Ambrose. Dean comes out first and has to yell at Owens’ attorney. Owens has an attorney? That doesn’t fit for some reason. Owens has been instructed to not show up tonight because it’s not a safe working environment. Oh sweet goodness with the legal storylines. That’s another trope you can check off the list for this show.
Dean says he was hoping for a quick beatdown tonight instead of having to actually do something. He goes to sign but here’s Owens, blowing off the ploy a good three minutes after it started. Dean is sent into the barricade but whips Owens into the steps and takes out the attorney as a bonus. Owens bails and the attorney gets Dirty Deeds before Dean signs.
Ryback vs. Ascension
Lana and Rusev are on commentary. Ryback throws Viktor around to start and plants Konnor with a spinebuster. The Meat Hook and Shell Shock put Viktor away at 1:29.
If you’re going to do that, BRING BACK JOBBERS! Good grief man. Someone explain to me the reason why we need to beat down a team that could be used somewhere else for the sake of pushing this midcard feud. If you’re going to have someone lose in 90 seconds, bring in jobbers who have nothing to lose. I know Ascension doesn’t have much to lose, but they COULD mean something if they’re built up. Add this to the list of annoying things WWE doesn’t understand that gets on my nerves because they’re so obsessed with this way of thinking and no one comes in and says “hey, that’s stupid.”
Ryback stares at the Russians or whatever country they’re from this week.
Recap of Rhyno returning Monday.
Becky Lynch vs. Paige
Paige’s early headlock doesn’t get her anywhere so she punches Becky in the ribs instead. Some knees to the head set up a chinlock on Becky but she comes back with some hard uppercuts. A double clothesline puts both of them down but here’s Charlotte coming to the ring, complete with full music. The distraction only works on Paige (because they’re feuding you see) and the Disarm-Her makes her tap at 3:23.
Rating: D+. So instead of having the champion get beat, let’s have the challenger get beat so we have even less of a reason to like her. I think they’re trying to make Paige the face here but much like everything else, they have no idea how to make the women likeable either. I’m sure the solution is to have her take credit for the Divas Revolution though and then have her be catty with everyone else.
Long video on Reigns vs. Sheamus. As I’ve said ever since it started: it’s a great Intercontinental Title feud but a lame main event.
League of Nations vs. Roman Reigns/Dean Ambrose/Usos
Alberto shoulders Jimmy down to start but Jimmy (who Booker identifies as having the facepaint on the right hand side, even though they’re exactly the same in the ring) comes back with a loud uppercut. Off to Jey vs. Rusev with the Bulgarian taking over as you would expect. Sheamus comes in with a kick to the head and we take a break. Back with Jey having his shirt ripped open for some forearms to the chest.
Reigns has to be held back from interfering but the distraction allows the tag to Ambrose but the fans aren’t ready to react. The middle rope dropkick puts Sheamus down and the bulldog sets up the strikes against the ropes. Barrett finally does something by tripping Ambrose from the floor, allowing Rusev to come in and choke away. Del Rio comes in for another chinlock (he’s a big fan of those tonight) and a Backstabber for two.
Sheamus’ suplex slam gets two and it’s off to another chinlock. Back to Rusev for a bearhug but Dean counters into a neckbreaker. A tornado DDT to Del Rio is enough for the hot tag to Reigns, though the crowd doesn’t seem that thrilled to see him again. Everything breaks down and the Usos take out Sheamus and Del Rio with stereo dives. The spear finishes Rusev at 13:47.
Rating: D+. Totally uninteresting main event here with nothing standing out. Reigns wins again before he gets screwed over on Sunday like we’re all expecting because that’s what the fans want to see: more of the same thing we’ve seen for a year now while we keep pedaling towards the carrot on a string that we can never reach.
Overall Rating: D-. I don’t say this often but this show was a huge waste of my time. I understand that this was the same taping as Tribute to the Troops but this felt more like that “special” (“Yeah it’s for the troops and totally not just us taping a house show so we can feel good about ourselves. USA!”) than a regular show.
Almost every single thing that happened on this show felt like it came from the book of WWE Easy Ideas and that’s not how you ever want a show to go. Between the champions losing, the contract signing and the tag team main event, I saw nothing on this show that makes me care about TLC. Nothing. Not a single thing. I’m sure the show will be fine, but this was a waste of my time.
It’s very clear right now that WWE isn’t trying. I know it happens every year at this time when the creative team basically puts it on autopilot and throws their feet up for the holidays, but this is the kind of show that makes me wonder why I should bother at this time of year. I never had that feeling before but it’s happening almost every November and December in recent years because WWE is stuck with five hours of TV a week and nowhere near enough ideas.
They need to give me a reason to care in a hurry (hint: you can have a face hold the title for more than five minutes in fifteen months) because this is getting old. Stop having champions lose, stop treating these shows like they don’t matter, stop repeating the same matches with guys trading meaningless five minute wins and stop using the same ideas every few weeks and expecting us to care. I usually give WWE the benefit of the doubt (more often than I should) but this is the kind of show that makes me feel like I’ve wasted my time and that’s the last thing I should feel when I’m watching something that should be entertaining.
Results
Roman Reigns vs. Alberto Del Rio went to a double DQ when the League of Nations, the Usos and Dean Ambrose interfered
Dolph Ziggler b. Tyler Breeze – Superkick
Lucha Dragons b. New Day – Salida Del Sol to Woods
Ryback b. Ascension – Shell Shock to Viktor
Becky Lynch b. Paige – Disarm-Her
Roman Reigns/Dean Ambrose/Usos b. League of Nations – Spear to Rusev
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Monday Night Raw – December 7, 2015: One on the Brake And Two on the Gas
Monday
Date: December 7, 2015
Location: North Charleston Coliseum, Charleston, South, Carolina
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Byron Saxton
It’s the go home show for TLC and the big story continues to be Roman Reigns and company vs. the League of Nations. There’s still a lot of the card to be set for Sunday but as usual, you can see most of it from here. The show isn’t looking bad and if they put enough violent gimmicks on the card, everything should be fine. Let’s get to it.
We open with a recap of Sheamus vs. Reigns and last week’s main event. Thankfully Reigns beating them on his own on Smackdown is omitted.
Here’s the League, now with their own music. Sheamus says he can’t look stupid if he’s the World Champion. As for this Sunday, how can he be afraid of defending the title against Reigns if he already beat him in 5:15? The WWE has entered the International Era and Sheamus lists off the four countries represented in the League. You’ll notice there are no Americans, because in 2015, America just isn’t good enough anymore. Sheamus says they’re the best of the best…….and we’ve got the Wyatts?
The fans immediately chant YES for the Wyatts. Bray says they haven’t been introduced because the League of Nations just lives in Bray’s world. They’re here for the chaos but here are the Dudley Boyz and Tommy Dreamer to interrupt. That was close. They almost had something interesting there before we get ANOTHER ECW reunion. Bray says they’re not getting the message that they’re outnumbered. Actually they’re multiplying because here’s Rhyno to even things up. Dang I was hoping for Dudley clones. Before they can get to the ring, here are Reigns, Ambrose and the Usos to make it sixteen people at once.
Dudley Boyz/Tommy Dreamer/Rhyno vs. Roman Reigns/Dean Ambrose/Usos vs. League of Nations vs. Wyatt Family
Elimination tag with one man from each team in the ring at once. Harper is quickly sent to the floor as Del Rio takes down Ambrose. It’s off to Jimmy beating on Rusev as D-Von is down in the corner and Harper tags in Bray. There are basically two matches going on at once. D-Von tags in Rhyno for some clotheslines and a suplex to Jimmy.
Strowman comes in to clean house and it’s off to Dreamer, wearing some Dusty Rhodes polka dot pants. Braun is knocked to the floor, allowing Rusev to take Dreamer down. The Usos load up a double superplex on Rusev but Strowman makes it a Tower of Doom with Dreamer being taken out in the process. Rowan tags himself in and takes a quick DDT from Dreamer for the elimination as we take a break. Thank goodness they got rid of the more interesting team so quickly.
Back with Del Rio beating up Jey and Dreamer until Tommy grabs a neckbreaker on the now legal Sheamus. Bubba comes in with a Rock Bottom for two on Sheamus but all twelve come in for a huge brawl. We get down to Rhyno vs. Reigns for a showdown but Rusev and Sheamus break it up. Rusev walks into a 3D and the Dudley Boyz set for What’s Up, only to have Sheamus Brogue Kick Bubba for the second elimination.
Things settle down to Sheamus vs. Ambrose but Rusev tags himself in before anything can happen. Dean goes off on Rusev with strikes (Saxton: “Ambrose is a different piece of toast), followed by the standing elbow drop for two. Back from another break with Sheamus firing off the ten forearms to Jey’s chest until Reigns makes the save.
It’s off to Rusev for a bearhug before Barrett misses a charge in the corner, allowing for the hot tag to Reigns. The fans are WAY behind Roman here (it’s an old NWA town so faces are popular and heels are hated) as he powerbombs Del Rio and Superman Punches Barrett and Alberto. Everything breaks down with a big series of dives and Del Rio gets Reigns in the armbreaker. Jimmy comes in with a Superfly splash for the save and it’s a spear to Sheamus for the pin at 21:36.
Rating: B-. Fun brawl here but the League of Nations is now 0-2 as a four man team and the already weak looking World Champion got pinned when you have three others who could take the fall. Rusev doesn’t even have a match on Sunday and he can’t take a pin here? Another good idea (like having the Wyatts out there) with questionable booking (like having them go out first) bringing it back down a bit when it didn’t need to.
Post break, Sheamus says that’s the closest he’s coming to losing the title. He’s going to smash Reigns up and he’ll give us a preview tonight.
Stardust is raving about Hollywood when Titus O’Neil comes in to say Stardust needs to get some. Well Eden is probably here tonight…….but Titus means some Stardust time, such as reading a good book and having a bottle of wine. Stardust goes on another rant and Titus leaves.
Dolph Ziggler vs. Kevin Owens
Non-Title and Tyler Breeze/Summer are here. Kevin trips him down to start and grabs a front facelock as Ambrose is in the back watching (while eating popcorn and drinking a soda). We hit the chinlock on Dolph until Ziggler counters into a rolling three quarter nelson for two. Ziggler dropkicks him down but gets clobbered in the face with an old Vader style forearm to the face.
They head outside with Ziggler’s headbutt not having much effect. The fall away slam into the barricade give Kevin three straight near falls and it’s time for some big right hands to the head. A kick to Dolph’s face gets two as Dolph keeps pulling himself up. Owens sends him shoulder first into the post for a nine count on the floor. The backsplash gets two more and Dolph falls back to the floor as we take a break.
Back with Owens slapping on a chinlock until Ziggler fights up and avoids a charge to send Owens shoulder first into the post for a change. Kevin is just fine and sends Ziggler out to the floor to try another countout. Dolph starts getting up again though so Owens goes outside, only to take the running DDT on the floor. Back in and Owens throws him with a release German suplex but misses the Cannonball. The Fameasser gets two and they trade superkicks with Ziggler falling on top for another near fall. Owens is right up though and it’s a Pop Up Powerbomb for the pin on Ziggler 19:07.
Rating: B-. Another good match here but it felt more long than anything else. Ziggler continues to be entertaining enough but you’re not going to get anything more than the same stuff every single time he’s out there. I’m really not sure why Breeze needed to be out here as he was just watching instead of actually doing anything. At least we get the TRILOGY match on Sunday because that’s all anyone wants to see right?
Post match Ambrose comes out and throws his popcorn and soda in Owens’ face.
The Wyatts are ready to crush the ECW guys. Strowman wants to become Dreamer’s nightmare later tonight.
Miz comes in to tell Neville that his offer of mentoring was serious on Smackdown. Donny Deutsch (star of a new show on USA) comes in to offer Neville a spot on his show. He gives Neville his card and tells Miz to get back to him in a few years. Miz gives Neville his card but Neville throws it away.
Alicia Fox/Brie Bella vs. Sasha Banks/Naomi
Fox and Banks start things off with Alicia grabbing a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. It’s off to Naomi who takes one as well to send Team Bad out to the floor. Tamina trips Alicia to take over and it’s a dropkick from Naomi for two. We hit the chinlock from Naomi, followed by another one from Sasha. Back up and Alicia rolls over for the hot tag to Brie. It’s time for the YES Kicks before everything breaks down. Another Tamina distraction sets up the Rear View for the pin on Brie at 5:28.
Rating: D. I’m so sick of these matches. We’ve seen them do the same stuff every single week for months now and nothing has changed except for the numbers. Naomi is still doing the same “HAVING FUN” offense, Banks is still as good as anyone in the division and Brie still has no idea if she’s a face or a heel. You would think they would learn at some point but it hasn’t happened in months now.
Post match New Day comes out to give Team Bad their own unicorn horns and everyone dances. Ok then.
The New Day is still in the ring after a break to talk about giving back. They’ve given a donation to the League of Nations and some baby names to Kim Kardashian and Kanye West for their new son. Then they have to give two different teams a Tag Team Title shot on Sunday in a ladder match. Why do they need ladders? They’re not house painters and they’re not saving cats from trees. We get a quick New Day Theater with Big E. playing a tree and Kofi playing a kitten. Woods says that New Day is a group of grown men and saves Kofi from the tree, end scene.
Lucha Dragons vs. New Day
Non-title, Woods is on the floor again and the Usos are on commentary. Cara and Kofi get things going with Kofi throwing him out to the floor for a suplex from Big E. Woods lays on the floor next to Cara and plays some trombone as we take a break. Back with Big E. missing a splash into the corner before it’s off to Kalisto for some rapid fire kicks and the corkscrew cross body to Kofi.
The comeback is short lived though as Kofi takes him into the corner again, only to have Kalisto come back with a sloppy headscissors. The (not) hot tag brings in Cara to really take over off a standing moonsault to Big E. Kofi is legal though and kicks Cara down, only to have the Usos get in a fight with Woods (Jey: “BEAT HIM LIKE HE STOLE SOMETHING!”). The distraction lets Cara roll Kofi up for the pin at 6:36.
Rating: C. That would be the second time in an hour and a half that a champion has been pinned to set up a title match on Sunday. I beg of you WWE, please find something new. There are other ways to set up something like this and it’s getting annoying to see this happen every single time.
The Usos leave with the horns and the trombone. So now they actually did steal something. SOMEONE BEAT THOSE TWO MEN LIKE THEY DESERVE!
After a recap of the opening match, Reigns says he’s fine with having a lesson from Sheamus, even though he has no idea what Sheamus could teach him.
We look back at Charlotte faking an injury to beat Becky Lynch last week.
It’s time for MizTV with guests Charlotte and Ric Flair. Charlotte takes over the introduction for her father and says Miz has ten minutes of Rolex time. Ric says he’s so proud and promises to be in his daughter’s corner at TLC this Sunday. That brings Miz to Charlotte’s new attitude, which sends her off on a mini rant about Miz being sexist. Miz shakes it off and asks about the match on Sunday, bringing up Paige costing Charlotte her friendship with Becky Lynch. He stays at it by asking about Paige saying Charlotte is only here because of her father.
Ric gets up at that but Charlotte yells about Paige, promising to destroy her on Sunday. This brings out the third guest and Paige really doesn’t look too upset. Ric says this is just a ploy so Charlotte goes outside. Paige slaps him in the face and does the strut. Ric: “Get her!” Charlotte charges but Paige runs to end the segment. So…..am I supposed to cheer for either of these two or is this another SHADES OF GRAY story that is in no way a method to keep the writers from having to figure out who they want to turn face?
We look at Reigns pinning Sheamus again.
Ryback vs. Rusev
Rematch from last week. Rusev chills on the floor to start and gets back in at nine. Ryback shoves him right back to the floor as Rusev is holding his back from earlier. Tired of waiting, Ryback busts out a corkscrew plancha (seriously). Ryback: “WE’RE HAVING FUN!” A quick backdrop sends Ryback over the top again and Rusev snaps the arm over the top as we take a break.
Back with Rusev still on the arm by bending it around the ropes and sending it into the post. Ryback’s comeback includes some shoulders followed by a flying shoulder to really mix it up. A middle rope dropkick (better than Brie Bella’s) gets two for Ryback and it’s time for a chase around the ring. Ryback runs Lana over by mistake (Lana may have intentionally gotten in his way) and hurts her ankle again, freaking Rusev out. He throws Ryback in the Accolade on the floor and it’s a double countout at 10:37.
Rating: C. Ryback was trying with some fresh offense out there (always appreciated) but he’s fallen back through the floor in importance again. That’s what happens when you build someone up on a short term basis, have him lose his two big matches and then do nothing with him for weeks. Oddly enough it’s the inactivity that hurts worse than the loss to Kalisto in the tournament.
Stardust vs. Jack Swagger
Titus is on commentary and this is joined in progress after a break with Swagger putting on the Patriot Lock. Stardust makes the rope as Del Rio and Colter come out, allowing Stardust to throw the arm into the post. Some choking on the ropes has Swagger in trouble but he comes back with clotheslines and a powerslam. The Patriot Lock makes Stardust tap at 2:40.
Post match Del Rio nails Swagger. Titus yells at Del Rio to watch out for Stardust so Alberto hits Stardust with a chair. Swagger grabs his own chair and knocks Alberto’s out of his hands before sending Del Rio running off. Jack asks Zeb what he’s thinking but Colter drives off.
This week’s Rosebush is about Miz wanting to mentor Neville. Apparently Miz wants Neville to be recast in Dumbo. Speaking of animals, we saw the return of Rhyno this week. This followed Tommy Dreamer’s, now with a golden tan. He thought he had baby oil but it was really Becky Lynch’s hair dye. This is still such a waste of anything Rose could do.
In the back, Del Rio yells at Colter for causing him to trip and drop the chair. Alberto says he doesn’t need Colter and threatens to use the chair on him. Colter claims that Del Rio wouldn’t be champion without him and drives off. So they’re split now, thank goodness.
Tommy Dreamer vs. Braun Strowman
Braun throws him around to start and drives in some shoulders to the ribs. We hit the nerve hold for a bit before the standing choke puts Dreamer away at 2:46. Total squash at a slow pace.
Here’s Reigns for the big showdown with Sheamus. Reigns asks where Sheamus is before talking about climbing the ladder with his Shield teammates over the years. He’s on top of the ladder and calls Sheamus out for a beating again. Cue Sheamus to say that Sunday is going to be a sequel when he beats Reigns down just like he did at Survivor Series. Reigns is ready right now but of course Sheamus doesn’t want to do it tonight.
Roman wants to know where Sheamus’ potatoes are because all he sees are tater tots. That brings Sheamus charging but he stops in front of the three tables laid against the apron. Sheamus promises to build a castle from all the broken toys on Sunday. Reigns challenges to fight him again tonight but Sheamus knows all Roman wants to do is use the weapons. That’s fine with Reigns (“Hold on a second tater tot”) who throws out all the goodies, one at a time to drag this out far longer than it needs to be.
Sheamus still won’t get in so Reigns keeps talking and it’s FINALLY on after nearly ten minutes of talking. Reigns gets the better of it at first and loads up the announcers’ table, only to have Sheamus take over and send him into a ladder (which Sheamus has to grab before it falls into the crowd). They fight into the crowd and then up to the entrance where all the tables and ladders are set up.
Sheamus blocks a powerbomb and hits him with a chair to take it back to ringside. Roman is thrown over the announcers’ table but comes back with a spear through one of the many tables to end the show. WAY too long here for what they did but points for not having everyone else come out and letting this be about the two of them for a change.
Overall Rating: C-. This was one of the fastest shows I can remember in a long time. The first two hours felt like they took half an hour and the last third wasn’t bad. Unfortunately the majority of the show was ok at best with the action being the biggest problem by far. The wrestling was just ok and a lot of the booking made my head hurt. They did a good job of setting up the pay per view but it was far from an entertaining show outside of that. Not the worst or anything, but a totally forgettable show.
Results
Roman Reigns/Dean Ambrose/Usos b. Wyatt Family, Dudley Boyz/Rhyno/Tommy Dreamer and League of Nations last eliminating the League of Nations
Kevin Owens b. Dolph Ziggler – Pop Up Powerbomb
Naomi/Sasha Banks b. Brie Bella/Alicia Fox – Rear View to Bella
Lucha Dragons b. New Day – Rollup to Kingston
Ryback vs. Rusev went to a double countout
Jack Swagger b. Stardust – Patriot Lock
Braun Strowman b. Tommy Dreamer – Standing choke
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of Wrestlemania at Amazon for just $3.99 at:
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And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at: