Impact Wrestling – August 3, 2023: They Might Have Overthought That One

Impact Wrestling
Date: August 3, 2023
Location: Cicero Stadium, Cicero, Illinois
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

We’re on the way to Emergence and the show still has a long way to go to setting up the card. Deonna Purrazzo is set to challenge Trinity for the Knockouts Title along with a few other matches but the show is going to need more than that. There is a good chance we will hear some more for the card this week so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is Trinity to talk about what Chicago means to her. This is where she made her Impact Wrestling debut. It’s amazing how far things have come for her because she was thinking about ending her career. Then she debuted here and wanted to become the Knockouts Champion and she DID IT. Cue Deonna Purrazzo to interrupt and congratulate Trinity on her win. She knows what it feels like to win the title on your first chance. The only difference between the two is that the roles are reversed.

Purrazzo says she never tapped out out, with Trinity saying she did at Slammiversary. Trinity says she can make Purrazzo tap, with Purrazzo saying prove it. Cue the Coven to interrupt, saying no one wants Trinity here. KiLynn King suggests that she should be champion and Taylor Wilde isn’t happy that they have to be in Chicago. Threats and a brawl lead to a match being made by Santino Marella.

Coven vs. Trinity/Deonna Purrazzo

Trinity and King go to the mat to start before Trinity elbows her in the face. A rather twisty rollup gives Trinity two but a headscissors is easily blocked. Wilde comes in and gets kicked in the stomach. Trinity is fine enough to take Wilde into the corner and rain down right hands….but Purrazzo tags herself in to cut things off. A hurricanrana sends Wilde flying but she takes Purrazzo into the corner so King can come in.

That doesn’t last long as Purrazzo gets away for the tag to Trinity as the pace picks up. A bulldog into the middle buckle rocks Wilde but King tosses Trinity off the top. King backflips Wilde into a moonsault onto Trinity for two as the villains take over again. Trinity fights up again though and gets over to Purrazzo for the hot tag.

King fights out of the Fujiwara armbar and gets two off a DDT as everything breaks down. Trinity’s Rear View is countered into a German suplex and everyone is down again. Purrazzo Fujiwaras King down again but Wilde makes the save this time. Trinity kicks Purrazzo in the head by mistake and the King’s Curse (pumphandle flipped into a faceplant) finishes Purrazzo at 10:15.

Rating: C+. The Coven getting a win back is a good thing and Trinity and Purrazzo having issues makes perfect sense. This wasn’t exactly inspired booking, but it was the kind of match that helped multiple things at once. I still like the Coven quite a bit and it would make sense to see them be put back in the title scene sooner than later.

The Rascalz are ready to win the #1 contenders tag team tournament, even if they should just get the title shot already. Scott D’Amore comes in to say they’re fined two weeks pay for coming back after they were ejected a few weeks ago. If they do it again, it’s an indefinite suspension, but yeah D’Amore is happy they’re back!

Alisha Edwards rants to Eddie Edwards about Traci Brooks. Jody Threat comes in say that’s nonsense and again, arguing leads to a match, this time next week.

Heath vs. Alan Angels

This is over who is the REAL rockstar of Impact. Angels slaps him in the face to start and then bails out to the floor. Back in and Heath knocks him outside again without much effort but stops to celebrate with some fans. That lets Angels dropkick toe steps in the knees, meaning Angels has a target back inside. The moonsault misses though and Heath gets to slug away. Angels manages to go up top but dives into a powerslam for a rather near fall. The Wake Up Call misses though and Angels goes right back to the knee. A kick to the head misses though and the Wake Up Call finishes for Heath at 6:17.

Rating: C+. Heath has really grown on me in recent months as he has this likability to him and it shows almost every time he’s out there. No he isn’t going to be World Champion or anything close to it, but he’s perfectly fine as a midcard face that the fans can get behind. Go with him for a little bit and let the fans have fun with him as it’s not going to hurt anything.

We look back at the Design taking out Eric Young last week.

Eric Young isn’t surprised at what happened but gets asked an interesting question: wasn’t he supposed to be dead? Young says the fans didn’t know what they were seeing and they will see what happened tonight.

Jake Something vs. Davey Vega

Jake sends him down fast to start and launches Vega off for trying a headlock. A running shoulder blasts Vega before Something smashes him with a heck of a forearm. Vega tries to leave but gets hit with a flying block block (like the start of a Thesz press but Jake stays on his feet), followed by a swinging Boss Man Slam for the pin at 2:35. Something looked great here.

Last week, Moose talked to Brian Myers, Bully Ray and Lio Rush, all of whom are here to get the World Title. Rush was told to give them an answer by the end of the night, which he did by joining them at the end of the show.

Myers, Moose and Ray interrupt Rush on the phone, with Ray asking who he’s talking to. Rush says that’s none of his business, but Ray is VERY happy with Rush’s decision. Rush says he’s not here to make friends, but Moose doesn’t care about that. All that matters is Rush helping them, which Rush will do at Emergence. Ray wants Rush with them next week for a six man tag and says they’ll trust him until he gives them a reason not to.

Digital Media Title: Joe Hendry vs. Yuya Uemura vs. Kenny King

King, with Sheldon Jean, is defending. Before the match, Hendry doesn’t seem happy with Uemura being involved in his one and only title rematch. King shoves Uemura into Hendry to start and we get a few rollups for two each. Back up and Hendry chops both of them until King hits him in the face. There’s a kick to Uemura in the corner as this isn’t exactly picking up the pace so far. King knocks Hendry to the floor and hits a running dropkick to Uemura. Back in and Hendry neckbreakers King, who DDTs Uemura at the same time as we take a break.

We come back with King forearming Hendry and then suplexing Uemura out to the floor. King can’t hit the Royal Flush on Hendry so here is Uemura to crossbody both of them down. Uemura tries it again but dives into Hendry’s cutter. Jean pulls Hendry out so King can get two so Hendry blasts Jean with a clothesline. King sends Uemura into King though and the Royal Flush finishes Uemura to retain the title at 12:19.

Rating: C+. This took some time to get going but it was a lot better once they came back from the break. What matters here is Uemura is the one who took the pin, which gets Hendry out of the title picture without taking a fall. That’s the best way to go for everyone as Uemura doesn’t really have much stature in the first place. Now do something else with Hendry already.

Flashback Moment of the Week: Mike Bailey b. Jack Evans at Emergence 2022.

Mike Bailey and Jonathan Gresham don’t quite agree with the way the rules are enforced around here but they think they can work together to win the #1 contenders tournament. This doesn’t seem to be the best pairing.

Video on Josh Alexander returning and uniting with the Motor City Machine Guns and Kushida against the resident heel faction. Kushida and Chris Sabin might not be on the same page about the X-Division Title though.

The Beautiful People and Awesome Kong will be back for Impact 1000. Cool.

The Death Dollz are looking for a plan to get a Knockouts Tag Team Title shot from Santino Marella. Crazzy Steve comes in to try and find out why it’s Courtney Rush and not Rosemary but she shoves him aside. Steve: “Ok I understand.”

Tag Team Titles #1 Contenders Tournament First Round: Rascalz vs. Jonathan Gresham/Mike Bailey

Miguel gets knocked down to start so it’s off to bailey to armdrag Wentz. The bouncing kicks have Wentz in more trouble and there’s the enziguri to put him down. Gresham comes in and works on the arm before tying up the leg as well. Miguel offers a distraction though, allowing Wentz to hit a good looking dropkick. Bailey is knocked off the apron and we take a break.

Back with Gresham fighting up and bringing Bailey in to pick up the pace. The standing shooting star press gets two on Miguel but a Wentz distraction lets Miguel grab a German suplex. Some kicks get Bailey out of trouble and Gresham comes back in for an assisted rolling cutter on Miguel with Wentz making the save. Everything breaks down and Gresham powerbombs and forearms Miguel for two. With the referee distracted Miguel gets in the spray paint to Gresham for the pin (with trunks) at 13:16.

Rating: B-. The spray paint thing is getting old fast but at least it’s something Miguel has done for a long time. The Rascalz moving forward is a better fit than another team of partners who hate each other but work well in the ring so they went with the logical move. Not a great match, but it made the Rascalz look good after a long time apart.

We look back at Deaner stabbing Eric Young to kill him off last year. Then Deaner sat there and Young laid there….until he spit up blood and started laughing. Young crawled outside and got on a motorcycle to ride away (while Deaner was presumably getting donuts or something). Young narrates a video about life and death being opposites.

Can you die if you never truly lived? Death can be a gateway and a door and it can be beautiful. But he’s not censored dead yet. A man can be killed and a body can be disposed of, but an idea is eternal. He’s more than death and more than an idea, so he will live forever. Uh yeah….we’re going to go with “they overthought this one” and move on.

Overall Rating: C+. The show was good enough with some nice action, but that Eric Young video at the end was so over the top that I was trying not to laugh. Other than that, I’m a bit optimistic about some of the names who could be moving up the charges, as Heath, Jake Something and Joe Hendry all seem like they could have bright futures. Impact is starting to make those people look like bigger deals and that is a good idea, as the roster is a good bit aged at the top. Now just figure something out with them and see how far you can go.

Results
The Coven b. Trinity/Deonna Purrazzo – King’s Curse to Purrazzo
Heath b. Alan Angels – Wake Up Call
Jake Something b. Davey Vega – Swinging Boss Man Slam
Kenny King b. Joe Hendry and Yuya Uemura – Royal Flush to Uemura
Rascalz b. Jonathan Gresham/Mike Bailey – Rollup with trunks to Gresham

 

 

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Slammiversary 2023: Something’s Missing

Slammiversary 2023
Date: July 15, 2023
Location: St. Clair College, Windsor, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

Impact is back to pay per view and the show is looking rather good on paper. The main event will feature Alex Shelley defending the World Title against Nick Aldis in what could be a heck of a match. Other than that, we may be in for a major surprise return as Scott D’Amore needs a tag partner and put in a phone call last week to close Impact. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Gisele Shaw/Jai Vidal/Savannah Evans vs. Jody Threat/Death Dollz

Jessicka and Evans go with the power lockup to start, with Jessicka shoving her around. Vidal comes in and gets hit in the head, followed by Shaw getting rammed into the buckle over and over. It’s off to Rush, who gets cheap shotted so the villains can take over. Vidal lays her over the middle rope for a running shot to the ribs but Rush reverse DDTs Evans. The hot tag brings in Threat to clean house, including a running knee to Shaw in the ropes. Vidal gets suplexed and Rush hits a spear for the pin at 5:34.

Rating: C. This was very quick and to the point, which didn’t leave them much time to get going. There is only so much that can be done with six people in less than six minutes, but they managed a short form story. Rush getting the win over a glorified lackey in Vidal makes sense and should start the night out on the right foot.

Pre-Show: Digital Media Title: Joe Hendry vs. Kenny King

King, with Sheldon Jean, is challenging. Before the match, Hendry says Stripper Kenny wants to strip him of the title, but that isn’t going to happen because the people believe. King charges to start and gets caught in a delayed vertical suplex. With King on the floor, Jean slips Hendry a Chippendale’s tie for some choking.

King gets two off a suplex of his own before grabbing a guillotine. Hendry powers up and does some hip gyrating while still managing a backdrop at the same time. The Standing Ovation connects but Jean puts the foot on the rope. King misses a dive onto Jean but he grabs a rollup (with Jean holding the feet) for the pin and the title at 6:09.

Rating: C-. What a weird match. It’s not just the result (Hendry losing here is beyond questionable and almost into the world of idiocy) but they rushed through everything and the ending game out of absolutely nowhere. The stripping deal was hardly an interesting story and I really wasn’t feeling a lot of this one.

The opening video talks about legacies and dreams with everyone having their own path. We get some clips of the stars on tonight’s show, complete with some classic audio, with most of the Steiner Math promo. I get what they’re going for, but that’s not exactly the most serious promo for something that should be pretty important.

Kushida vs. Alan Angels vs. Jake Something vs. Jonathan Gresham vs. Kevin Knight vs. Mike Bailey

Ultimate X for a future X-Division Title match. Something is a surprise and runs some people over to start but Knight climbs onto Something’s shoulders in a failed attempt. Instead Something powerbombs Knight onto the pile at ringside before running over Gresham and Bailey.

A quadruple dropkick staggers Something until Gresham and Bailey get to clean house. Hold on though as the team isn’t sure who gets to go after the X, so Angels super Spanish Flys both of them down. Angels gets dropkicked down onto a pile on the floor but Bailey climbs onto the structure and hits a gigantic moonsault onto everyone else.

Something starts getting back up so it’s a bunch of chair shots to put him back down. Back in and Angels goes for the X but drops down to poisonrana Knight instead. Gresham gets low blowed by Angels, who climbs up just like Kushida. Angels is knocked down though and Kushida gets the win at 11:13.

Rating: B-. This wasn’t one of the better Ultimate X matches as it was more about stopping Something, who didn’t really go for the win anyway. Kushida getting the win is fine as more Kushida is always a good thing, but these matches are all about the stunts and the drama, with the latter not really being around this time.

Former Team Canada member A1 is here.

We run down the card as the structure is taken down.

Kenny King brags about winning the Digital Media Title and says this is the only title that matters.

We recap the Knockouts Tag Team Title match. The Coven, the champions, attacked Killer Kelly so Masha Slamovich, her former rival. Kelly and Masha are being presented as a certain kind of team without anything ever being flat out said.

Knockouts Tag Team Titles: The Coven vs. Masha Slamovich/Killer Kelly

The Coven is defending. Kelly shoves Wilde around to start and invites her to start fighting. Everything breaks down quickly, with the champs in early trouble. Slamovich comes in and gets Russian legsweeped for two, allowing King to come in and toss her into the corner. Slamovich gets in a double stomp and hands it back to Kelly, who is sent throat first into the middle rope.

King misses a middle rope backsplash though and it’s Slamovich coming back in to clean house. Wilde grabs a Codebreaker into King’s German suplex to slow Slamovich down but she misses the running knees. Everything breaks down again and Wilde’s Witch’s Wrath (swinging fisherman’s neckbreaker) gets two as King and Kelly fight outside. That leaves Slamovich to hit the Snowplow to finish Wilde for the pin and the titles at 9:02.

Rating: C+. This got better near the end and while there still isn’t much of a division to be seen, it is nice to see a pair of actual teams for a change. The Coven has been quite the addition to the division and Kelly and Slamovich could do well too. It helps that they feel like teams rather than two women being thrown together, so this felt like an important title match. If nothing else, Slamovich finally winning something is nice to see, as she felt like the next big thing in the regular Knockouts division.

We recap Bully Ray/Deaner vs. Scott D’Amore/???, which is much more about Ray vs. D’Amore. Ray hates how D’Amore runs the company so D’Amore is finally standing up for himself. Deaner is replacing Steve Maclin and D’Amore’s original partner PCO was set on fire, so it’s mystery partner time.

Bully Ray/Deaner vs. Scott D’Amore/???

Big Kon is here with the villains and former NHL enforcer Darren McCarty, who doesn’t like Ray either, is guest enforcer. We get the old Team Canada theme and…..Eric Young is back as the mystery partner, despite dying in December. Young and Deaner (the guy who MURDERED him last year) start things off as we get the explanation of “eh, looks like Young is back”.

Ray comes in and gets his arm cranked before it’s off to D’Amore, who has Ray backing up. It’s off to Deaner, who gets leg lariated down and legdropped for two, setting up a reverse 3D for two. A Sky High gives D’Amore two but Kon and McCarty have a staredown, allowing Deaner to take over on D’Amore. Now Ray is willing to come in on beat on D’Amore, meaning it’s time for the crowd to sing O CANADA in a great touch.

Ray yells at the referee….who walks out on the match, meaning McCarty is now the full on referee. Some left hands to the jaw wake D’Amore up enough to spear Ray down, allowing the tag off to Young. The piledriver hits Deaner but Kon pulls McCarty outside. A1 (still in the crowd) takes out Kon, leaving McCarty to Stun Ray. A three man What’s Up means the good guys can get the tables and Ray is chokeslammed through. D’Amore Canadian Destroys Deaner, setting up Young’s top rope elbow for the pin at 11:49.

Rating: C+. This was a goofy match and that’s what it needed to be. There were multiple changes to the match and while Ray got beaten up, it felt like it let the door open for a D’Amore vs. Ray showdown later on. For now though, it was nice to have Young back, as at least he gets to be around here rather than waiting and waiting and waiting for his WWE return.

Nick Aldis is ready to beat Alex Shelley because he is a closer, and he’s ready to close Shelley’s book.

We recap Lio Rush challenging Chris Sabin for the X-Division Title. Sabin won the title for the ninth time last month and now Rush is here to get it for the first time.

X-Division Title: Lio Rush vs. Chris Sabin

Sabin is defending….and gets jumped on the floor before the bell. The medical staff comes out to say Sabin can’t go but Sabin says he’ll do it anyway. The bell rings and Rush knocks him down again, setting up a spinning kick to the head. Rush hits the Final Hour for two, followed by a second for the pin and the title at 1:18. I’m going to assume Sabin is injured or something, as this is a very odd way to go otherwise.

In the back, Alex Shelley has nothing to say about what just happened.

Tag Team Titles: Subculture vs. Rich Swann/Sami Callihan vs. Bullet Club vs. Moose/Brian Myers

The Club (Chris Bey/Ace Austin) is defending, Subculture (Mark Andrews/Flash Morgan Webster) has Dani Luna in their corner and it’s one fall to a finish. Bey and Andrews start things off by trading some flips until Austin comes in for a headscissors. Webster comes in for a pair of flipping dives and a near fall. A standing moonsault drops Austin so it’s off to Callihan to throw Swann at Austin.

Moose and Myers both come in but stereo powerbombs are broken up. The Club clears the ring but Bey’s running flip dive is countered into an apron powerbomb from Moose. Austin knees Moose in the face from the apron but Callihan shoves people onto the pile on the floor. We settle down to Webster striking away at Swann and Callihan until the latter grabs a Death Valley Driver.

Swann misses his middle rope 450 and the Club hits a springboard kick into a torture rack neckbreaker. Moose and Myers are both back in to clean house until Andrews kicks both of them away. The Stundog Millionaire hits Moose and Webster’s Shadows Over Malice (Swanton) gets two. We hit the parade of strikes to the face until Swann and Bey cutter Moose out of the air. The 1-2-Sweet is broken up and here are the Rascalz to go after the Club. Webster hits his standing Sliced Bread #2 on Austin, setting up Fall To Pieces (shooting star press) to give Andrews the pin and the titles at 10:35.

Rating: B-. A few weeks ago, Subculture’s match against the Motor City Machine Guns seemed to be enough to get them a job and that seems to be the case. If nothing else it got them the titles here in an entertaining match. Much like the Ultimate X match, there was only so much to be seen here with so many people flying around, but what we got was a lot of fun.

We recap Eddie Edwards vs. Frankie Kazarian. They’re both veterans and have split the first two matches, as Kazarian doesn’t seem to like Eddie’s lack of respect. This is the “here are two veterans who are going to have a good match” match and their wives are both here too.

Frankie Kazarian vs. Eddie Edwards

Kazarian has Traci Brooks and Edwards has Alisha Edwards. They start fast with Kazarian snapping off a hurricanrana into a headlock. Back up and Kazarian chops away but Alisha offers a distraction. Traci does it right back, allowing Kazarian to hit a Backstabber for two. Edwards drops Kazarian hard to the floor and a suplex gives Edwards two back inside.

Kazarian comes back with a release German suplex and Edwards is sent outside. The diving hurricanrana drops Edwards again but the women nearly get into it, allowing Eddie to hit a big dive. The fans are all over Eddie, complete with BOSTON SUCKS chants, so Kazarian makes the comeback with some shots to the face.

Kazarian drops a springboard spinning legdrop for two but Eddie is right back with the backpack Stunner for two. A nice looking top rope superplex drops Kazarian again and they’re both down. Both miss the others’ finisher so Kazarian sends him to the apron and slingshots him back into a cutter for two.

The referee gets bumped and a double clothesline leaves both of them down. Alisha tries to bring in the kendo stick so Traci takes her down. With the women out, Kazarian gets the chickenwing to make Eddie tap but there’s no referee. Kazarian goes to check on him and gets kendo sticked in the head. The Boston Knee Party finishes for Eddie at 17:43.

Rating: B. I’m not sure there is a way for these two to have an actually bad match, so giving them this much time on a big stage was a near guaranteed success. It might not have been some epic showdown, but it was a solid back and forth match between two talented stars. You can run a match like this anytime and it will work, as it did here.

We recap Trinity challenging Deonna Purrazzo for the Knockouts Title. Trinity has shown up and is ready to be the new star, but Purrazzo is saying not so fast.

Knockouts Title: Trinity vs. Deonna Purrazzo

Purrazzo is defending and has a live violinist play her to the ring. They trade armdrags to start before Trinity has to roll away from a Fujiwara armbar. The threat of the Rear View sends Purrazzo outside so Trinity takes her down with a slingshot flip dive. Back in and Purrazzo starts in on the arm and the cranking has Trinity in trouble. Trinity tries to go up top but gets pulled into a leg/neck crank to keep her down.

With that broken up, Trinity manages a kick to the face into a Samoan drop. A springboard kick to the face gives Trinity two but Purrazzo is back with a leg trap Tombstone for the same. The Queen’s Gambit is blocked so Purrazzo settles for the Fujiwara armbar. Trinity makes the rope and hits a slingshot X Factor. The split legged moonsault gets two but Purrazzo is right back with a Queen’s Gambit on the apron for two. Back up and Trinity quickly pulls her into Starstruck for the tap and the title at 14:26.

Rating: B-. I’m not sure what was missing here but it didn’t quite get to the next level. Trinity is crazy athletic and feels like a star but the match felt like a pretty firm downgrade from the usual great Knockouts stuff. She did win in a good match here and it makes sense to go with her early on, so well done here, even if it could have been better.

We recap Alex Shelley defending the World Title against Nick Aldis. Shelley finally won the title last month and Aldis doesn’t like the lack of respect since his return. Aldis turned on him, and now it’s time for a title showdown.

Impact Wrestling World Title: Nick Aldis vs. Alex Shelley

Shelley is defending and spits water in Aldis’ face to start fast. Aldis powerbombs him hard out of the corner and the King’s Lynn Cloverleaf is on in less than a minute. With that escaped, Aldis grabs some suplexes but Shelley dragon screws the leg. Aldis is knocked to the floor but cuts off the baseball slide by tying Shelley in the ring skirt.

Shelley gets posted and sent into the barricade but manages a Stunner over the ropes for a needed breather. It’s off to Aldis’ arm for a change, with Shelley wrapping it around the post to take over. Aldis’ fingers are bent into the turnbuckle but he rakes the eyes for a needed breather.

Shelley is right back to the bad arm but Aldis clotheslines him down. The top rope elbow is countered into a superplex, followed by a standing Sliced Bread to plant Aldis. Shelley snaps the fingers, which are good enough to piledrive Shelley for two. The top rope elbow gets the same so let’s bring in the title. With the referee taking it away, Aldis hits a low blow into a Michinoku Driver for two but Shelley kicks the belt away. A DDT onto the belt busts Aldis open and Shell Shock retains the title at 16:33.

Rating: B. It was another rather good match but I don’t know if it was going to draw in that much interest. Shelley winning the title was a very cool moment, but he doesn’t quite feel like the top star. The same is true for Aldis, who has made a career out of having the tools without making fans care all that much. The wrestling was fine and Shelley using Aldis’ cheating against him was good, but I never really got pulled into it.

We get a video on the match….and Josh Alexander is back to stare Shelley down to end the show. Well there’s Bound For Glory.

Overall Rating: B-. I’m not sure what it was but I couldn’t get into this show. The wrestling was fine to good, but nothing on here made me all that interested in what they were doing. The show had all kinds of title changes though and that should give them a lot of momentum going forward. They need something of a top story though and while Shelley vs. Alexander looks good on paper, I don’t know how well it will go in reality. Completely watchable show and you won’t feel like you’ve wasted your time, but not a great one.

Results
Jody Threat/Death Dollz b. Gisele Shaw/Jai Vidal/Savannah Evans – Spear to Vidal
Kenny King b. Joe Hendry – Assisted rollup
Kushida won Ultimate X
Masha Slamovich/Killer Kelly b. The Coven – Snowplow to Wilde
Eric Young/Scott D’Amore b. Deaner/Bully Ray – Top rope elbow to Deaner
Lio Rush b. Chris Sabin – Final Hour
Subculture b. Moose/Brian Myers, Rich Swann/Sami Callihan and Bullet Club – Fall To Pieces to Austin
Eddie Edwards b. Frankie Kazarian – Boston Knee Party
Trinity b. Deonna Purrazzo – Starstruck
Alex Shelley b. Nick Aldis – Shell Shock

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Impact Wrestling – July 13, 2023: Land This Thing

Impact Wrestling
Date: July 13, 2023
Location: Center Stage, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

Slammiversary is this weekend and that means it is time for the hard sell show. Impact has done well with these in recent months and it would be nice to see them do it here for one of their biggest shows of the year. Alex Shelley vs. Nick Aldis is likely going to get a lot of the focus so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

With Steve Maclin injured, Bully Ray has selected Deaner as his replacement for the Slammiversary tag match.

Zachary Wentz vs. Chris Bey

Trey Miguel and Ace Austin are here too. Feeling out process to start with Wentz taking him into the corner for some screaming. Wentz gets taken to the mat for a stomp to the back but Bey is sent crashing out to the floor. Bey fights out of an arm crank and runs Wentz over in the corner, setting up the kick to the head. A Code Red gives Bey two but Miguel superkicks Austin. The distraction lets Wentz do….something (commentary wasn’t sure either) and a headlock driver finishes Bey at 6:44.

Rating: C+. This was Wentz’s return to the spotlight and he looked fine enough out there. Granted the Rascalz were always more of a team than individuals in Impact so seeing Wentz on his own was a little strange. The good thing is that this does not seem to add the Rascalz to the Tag Team Title match, which already has enough challengers.

Dirty Dango attacked Santino Marella on BTI.

Santino and Scott D’Amore were in the back when the Rascalz pop in to say they want in the Tag Team Title match. That seems to be a no so the annoyed Rascalz leave.

Kevin Knight vs. Mike Bailey

They start slow until Bailey snaps off a headlock takeover. Back up and Bailey armdrags him into an armbar but Knight armdrags his way to freedom. A splash gives Knight two but he misses a springboard crossbody. Bailey sends him outside for the middle rope moonsault and we take a break. Back with Knight knocking him to the floor and hitting a dive of his own as we take a break.

We come back with Bailey in trouble but he manages a faceplant to take over. The moonsault knees connect but Knight jumps to the top for one heck of a superplex. They go to the pinfall reversal sequence for two each until Knight grabs a sitout spinebuster for two. Back up and Bailey sends him into the corner for the tornado kick into the Ultimate Weapon to finish Knight at 13:30.

Rating: C+. It continues to amaze me how much better Bailey is when he reels things in. He is capable of doing some great athletic stuff and making it look effortless, and as long as he doesn’t get to ignore a knee injury, he’s quite good. Knight is someone I’ve seen multiple times now and he has something, but he has to be around for a bit for anything to take hold.

Masha Slamovich and Killer Kelly are ready to take the Knockouts Tag Team Titles from the Coven.

Here is Joe Hendry for a chat. He’s here to help people, such as Stripper Kenny. For tonight, he and his partner can help take care of King.

Joe Hendry/Yuya Uemura vs. Kenny King/Sheldon Jean

The fans tell King, wearing a sweatshirt, to take it off as he starts with Henry. Uemura and Jean come in, with the former grabbing some headlock takeovers. Jean takes Uemura into the corner and the double stomping is on. That’s broken up with a kick to the head and Uemura gets over to Hendry for the tag.

House is quickly cleaned including a fall away slam into a nipup, followed by an RKO to King. Hendry even TAKES OFF THE SWEATSHIRT, leaving King embarrassed. The shirt is thrown at him (setting up an argument about whether that’s a foreign object) so King leaves, meaning it’s an enziguri into the Standing Ovation to finish Jean at 5:33.

Rating: C+. Sweet goodness Hendry is fun. There’s something about him that makes you want to watch whatever he is doing and it works every time. I’m not sure how high he’ll go in Impact, but that smile and that charisma make you want to see what he is doing. Mocking King for being a former stripper is bit of a stretch, but dang if Hendry isn’t trying to make it work.

Flashback Moment Of The Week: Chris Sabin wins the X-Division Title at Slammiversary 2013.

Lio Rush is ready to win the X-Division Title.

Chris Sabin knows Rush is very talented, but he gets why Rush isn’t wanted in any locker room.

Moose/Brian Myers vs. Sami Callihan/Rich Swann

Swann kicks Myers around to start before Callihan comes in for some shots to the face. A rake to the eyes allows Moose to come in but it’s way too early for the powerbomb. Instead Callihan low bridges him to the floor, where Swann flip dives onto both of them as the villains are in early trouble. Back in and Moose knocks both of them to the floor as we take a break.

We come back with Swann fighting out of a chinlock and rolling Moose up for two, only to get dropped hard. A kick to the head allows Swann to get over to Callihan for the hot tag, meaning house can be cleaned. Everything breaks down and Myers kicks Moose in the face by mistake. Swann cutters Myers but Moose shoves Callihan into them to break up the cover. A 450 gives Swann two with Moose managing a kickout without a save. Myers pulls Swann out and the distraction lets Moose hit a low blow. The spear finishes Callihan at 13:58.

Rating: C. That’s the right way to go, as you need Myers and Moose to feel like a threat. They certainly have the talent between them, but at some point they have to actually win some matches. This was a good start, though I’m not sure how likely they are to win the titles at Slammiversary. Granted the same could be said about Swann and Callihan, but they have a bit more history together.

Subculture is ready to win the Tag Team Titles for the people who don’t fit in.

Angels is ready to win the X-Division Title.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

Video on Nick Aldis, who wants the World Title back. Alex Shelley knows where the title will wind up and he can give it up on his face or on his back.

Here is Deonna Purrazzo to say people have forgotten who she is so it’s Champ Champ Challenge time.

Knockouts Title: Deonna Purrazzo vs. Jody Threat

Threat is challenging and gets taken down with a headlock takeover to start. Back up and Threat fires off some corner clotheslines for two but Purrazzo knocks her right back down. The stomping keeps Threat down and we take a break. We come back with Purrazzo working on the arm and hitting a knee to the face. A Russian legsweep sets up the Fujiwara armbar, sending Threat over to the rope.

Threat gets in a shot of her own and it’s a double knockdown for a breather. Back up and Threat snaps off a suplex before forearming Purrazzo in the jaw. A top rope cannonball sets up a hard clothesline for two but the F Bomb is broken up. Purrazzo pulls her into the Fujiwara armbar but Threat rolls out again. Threat plants her down for two but the F Bomb is countered into the Venus de Milo to retain the title at 9:17.

Rating: C+. Threat isn’t someone who feels like a top star, but she hadn’t lost until now and that made her more of a realistic possibility to take the title. At the same time, Purrazzo won a match she should have won. This was a match that was put together well and Purrazzo had to work to get the win, so nice stuff all around.

Post match Savannah Evans, Gisele Shaw and Jai Vidal come in for the beatdown so here are the Death Dollz to even things up. Cue Masha Slamovich and Killer Kelly, followed by Trinity to make it an even bigger brawl. Referees try to break it up, leaving Trinity vs. Purrazzo in the big staredown to end the show.

A long Slammiversary preview wraps it up.

Scott D’Amore is on the phone and says this time PCO can’t come back to life, so he wants to know if the person on the phone can. D’Amore grabs a Team Canada jacket to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. Not the best show this week but it more or less held things in place as we get to Slammiversary this weekend. Ending things with the women was an interesting choice as that’s a big match that hasn’t gotten a ton of attention. What matters is Slammiversary is set and if Impact can make everything work, we should be in for a heck of a pay per view.

Results
Zachary Wentz b. Chris Bey – Headlock driver
Mike Bailey b. Kevin Knight – Ultimate Weapon
Joe Hendry/Yuya Uemura b. Kenny King/Sheldon Jean – Standing Ovation to Jean
Moose/Brian Myers b. Sami Callihan/Rich Swann – Spear to Moose
Deonna Purrazzo b. Jody Threat – Venus de Milo

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – June 22, 2023: Please Don’t Do This

Impact Wrestling
Date: June 22, 2023
Location: Ohio Expo Center, Columbus, Ohio
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

Things took a turn last week when #1 contender Nick Aldis laid out World Champion Alex Shelley. This adds quite the wrinkle to their upcoming Slammiversary title match and I’m curious to see how all of that goes. Other than that, Scott D’Amore is ready to get his hands on Bully Ray next month. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

OVE vs. Good Hands/Brian Myers

Before the match, Skyler says OVE stands for Ohio vs. Everything. Well he’ll take everything from tooth decay to an IRS audit over Ohio. Crist kicks Skyler down to start and hands it off to Callihan for a double spinebuster. Fulton comes in for a double chokeslam/World’s Strongest Slam combination (that was cool) to take the villains down.

A Myers distraction takes Crist down though and the Good Hands drop a double elbow for two. Myers comes in with a suplex for one and we hit the chinlock. Crist fights up so Skyler comes back in for a slam to cut it off again. A forearm finally gives Crist a breather and he nips up for the tag off to Callihan. Cue Moose to crotch Crist on top so Callihan and Fulton go after him. The distraction lets Myers hit the Roster Cut for the pin at 5:40.

Rating: C+. Rather formula based match here and the ending helps establish Moose and Myers as a team who could be something down the line. OVE feels almost like a blast from the past but they’re good enough for a spot like this. As long as they’re away from the Design, it’s kind of hard to complain that much.

Eddie Edwards comes up to talk to Frankie Kazarian and says Frankie can trust him tonight in their tag match. Kazarian doesn’t quite buy that so Eddie asks what he has to do. Eddie doesn’t need to worry about it but he swears on the grave of Killer Kowalski that he won’t do anything to Kazarian. That’s enough for Frankie, but he doesn’t seem completely convinced.

Sami Callihan is livid when Rich Swann comes up to him in the back. Callihan wants to know where Swann was and Swann says he was busy at Against All Odds. From now on, Swann has his back as his top priority. Callihan approves.

Here is Dirty Dango for a chat. Dango: “Man do I hate professional wrestling.” And that’s it before his match.

Dirty Dango vs. Bhupinder Gujjar

Dango shoulders him over to start and dances a bit, allowing Gujjar to come back up with a shoulder. Some dropkicks put Dango on the floor for a slingshot dive but the Gargoyle spear misses back inside. Dango hits a layout reverse DDT for the pin at 2:00.

Post match Dango grabs a phone and says something we can’t hear. Cue Santino Marella, with Gujjar sending Dango inside for the Cobra.

The Death Dollz run into the returning Nevaeh and aren’t sure if they should trust her. They don’t have much of a choice though, and it’s time to learn the parts of the story they don’t know. Courtney Rush loves an origin story….so the Dollz runs off without her.

Zicky Dice passes his test to become an official referee. The referee giving him his test treats it as a serious deal but Johnny Swinger gets rid of him. Swinger flat out says this is so he can cheat to get his fifty wins.

Mike Bailey/Jonathan Gresham vs. The Design

Gresham comes in off a very early blind tag to dropkick Angels in the back, allowing Bailey to kick him in the face. Kon comes in to wreck both of them though and Angels adds a half and half suplex. We take a break and come back with Gresham getting away to bring Bailey back in for the kicks to Kon. The bouncing kicks set up the kick to the head and a missile dropkick puts Kon down instead.

Kon is fine enough to muscle Bailey up from the mat for a slam though and the Design takes right back over. That doesn’t last long as Gresham comes in for the save, allowing Bailey to armbreaker Angels. With that broken up, Bailey moonsaults onto Kon on the floor. Back in and Bailey gets caught in a super Spanish Fly, but Deaner stops to yell at Angels. The distraction causes Angels to miss his frog splash, allowing Bailey to hit the tornado kick. The Ultimate Weapon finishes Angels at 9:28.

Rating: C+. This match did one important thing and that is getting us closer to the destruction of the Design. The team has LONG outlived its usefulness (which wasn’t much in the first place) and now they finally seem to be going away. Gresham and Bailey were good enough as a team, but I don’t need them becoming the next dream team to go after the titles.

Flashback Moment Of The Week: Magnus (Nick Aldis) beats Jeff Hardy in the Dixieland match to win the World Title on December 18, 2013.

Gisele Shaw and Gail Kim are going to be on the Amazing Race: Canada. We don’t have any clips or anything similar to hype it up, but it’s true.

Trinity isn’t happy with Gisele Shaw getting a Knockouts Title shot on the upcoming Australian tour but she’s fine with the Slammiversary match being a triple threat if it has to be. For now though, she’ll beat up Jai Vidal next week instead.

Nick Aldis has sent in a statement saying he won’t be here tonight due to fear of his own safety. Alex Shelley comes in and doesn’t buy it, saying he wants Aldis here. Aldis will be here next week so Shelley leaves, only to come back with a superkick when interviewer Jimmy Jacobs runs his mouth too much.

Taylor Wilde vs. Killer Kelly

Feeling out process to start and Kelly seems pleased with the thought of violence. A shot to the throat and a pump kick give Kelly two and a running kick to the chest drops Wilde again. King low bridges Kelly to the floor though and Wilde gets to kick away back inside. The surfboard goes on but is broken up just as fast, allowing Kelly to suplex her into the corner. They fight over a rollup for two each until Kelly pulls her into the Killer Klutch. That’s broken up as well so Kelly grabs a rollup for the pin at 5:08.

Rating: C. Nice back and forth match with Kelly getting a win for a change. I could go for her getting a stronger push as she has felt like someone who could go a lot higher rather quickly. For now at least she is getting a win and if she can find a partner, we could have some fresh challengers for the Knockouts Tag Team Titles. They certainly could use some new challengers so that’s certainly an idea.

Post match the beatdown is on but Masha Slamovich comes in to save Kelly. The villains bail and Kelly seems to approve.

We recap Scott D’Amore attacking Bully Ray last week, setting up the tag match with PCO and Steve Maclin at Slammiversary.

D’Amore says he is no longer the president so he takes off the fancy stuff before saying he isn’t what he once was. His prime, if he had one, wasn’t as good as Ray or Maclin, but he coached a lot of people over the years and is a five time Canadian Heavyweight Champion. He’ll break any rule or cross any line, and since he brought Ray into this company, it’s time he took him out. The sleeves are rolled up and now he’s ready for war. Good promo here, as D’Amore sounds like a man who has to do something.

Here is Joe Hendry to say….extraterrestrials have made contact with Earth. It makes sense to do it now because he is Digital Media Champion. Those aliens are trying to say the two most important words: WE BELIEVE.

Digital Media Title: Joe Hendry vs. Yuya Uemura

Hendry is defending and here are Kenny King and Sheldon Jean to interrupt. The former sits in on commentary as Hendry works on a headlock. Some armdrags have Hendry down, causing him to bow in respect. We take a break and come back with the camera on King before looking at Uemura fighting out of a chinlock. A belly to back suplex gives Uemura two but Hendry is back up to strike it out. Hendry rolls through a high crossbody and it’s the Standing Ovation to retain the title at 9:07.

Rating: C. This didn’t have time to get very far as the break and then the camera sitting on King didn’t do it any favors. King vs. Hendry is fine for a likely title feud and it wouldn’t shock me to see King get the title. At some point he has to win something new and the Digital Media Title would work well. As for Uemura, he continues to be a completely fine hand in the ring, though he needs to actually win a few matches at some point before the impact fades.

Slammiversary and Australian shows rundown.

Bully Ray/Steve Maclin vs. Frankie Kazarian/Eddie Edwards

Alisha Edwards is here with Kazarian/Eddie. Maclin and Eddie start things off with Maclin dropping him off a running elbow. Eddie is fine enough to pull him over for a slingshot legdrop from Kazarian. Maclin sends him into the corner where Ray crotches Kazarian against the post and we take a break.

Back with Kazarian being knocked into the corner again as the slow being is on. A suplex gives Maclin two and we hit the reverse chinlock. With that broken up, Eddie comes back in to chop away and a double suplex drops Ray. Eddie’s suicide dive hits Ray and Kazarian’s slingshot hurricanrana takes Maclin down on the floor. Back in and Maclin knocks Eddie to the floor where Ray grabs a chair. Instead Ray chases Alisha off and it’s Maclin chinlocking Eddie again.

An Irish Curse gives Maclin two and Ray comes back in to punch him down. Eddie gets up and crossbodies Maclin for a double knockdown. The tag brings in Kazarian to pick up the pace as everything breaks down. Kazarian drops Maclin for two as Eddie and Ray come in (sans tags) to rake each others’ eyes. Ray shoves Eddie into Kazarian, who is right back with the chickenwing. Eddie is back up and accidentally superkicks Kazarian, allowing Maclin and Ray to hit a belly to back neckbreaker for the pin at 15:31.

Rating: B-. Nice enough main event here, and I kind of like having the teams who don’t like each other not being able to win their first match against each a team of former World Champions. Eddie vs. Kazarian should be a fun match at Slammiversary assuming that is the way they go. Other than that, we had a back and forth match with the action doing well, though it never quite got to that next level.

The winners are happy and the losers aren’t to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The main event helped but this show wasn’t quite up to the standards of the usual stuff they do around here. Slammiversary is about three weeks away and you can see a lot of the card from here, though that doesn’t make it the most interesting. The lack of Aldis after last week’s big turn didn’t help either and it wasn’t the most interesting offering as a result. It’s not bad, but more of a skippable show than usual this week.

Results
Brian Myers/Good Hands b. OVE – Roster Cut to Crist
Dirty Dango b. Bhupinder Gujjar – Layout reverse DDT
Jonathan Gresham/Mike Bailey b. The Design – Ultimate Weapon to Angels
Killer Kelly b. Taylor Wilde – Rollup
Joe Hendry b. Yuya Uemura – Standing Ovation
Bully Ray/Steve Maclin b. Frankie Kazarian/Eddie Edwards – Belly to back neckbreaker to Kazarian

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – June 8, 2023

Impact Wrestling
Date: June 8, 2023
Location: Western Fair District Agriplex, London, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

Somehow this is the go home show for Against All Odds, despite being less than two weeks removed from Under Siege. The main event of tomorrow’s show will see Steve Maclin defending the World Title against Alex Shelley, so odds are the hard push is on tonight. Other than that, Bully Ray is still the big bad and needs someone to come after him. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Chris Bey vs. Jason Hotch

Ace Austin, Brian Myers and John Skyler are here too. Before the match, Myers and Skyler promise that after Against All Odds, the Tag Team Titles will be in good hands. Hotch tries a rollup to start but gets suplexed down for his efforts. Bey chops away in the corner but a springboard is countered with a shove over the top to the floor. Back in and Bey hits a backdrop before kicking him in the head. The Art of Finesse is countered into a heck of a Blue Thunder Bomb to give Hotch two. Bey is back with a kick to the face but Hotch tries la majistral. That’s fine with Bey, who stacks him up for the pin at 7:36.

Rating: B-. The word I think of when I see a Bey match is “smooth”. He can make anything he does in the ring look good and that was the case again here, as he and Hotch got to go out there and do their thing for a bit with nothing looking bad. The title match should be good as well and I could go for more of any combination of these guys.

Post match the beatdown is on, with the champs being left laying.

Heath is back and ready for the 8-4-1 match. Tonight, he’ll take out Champagne Singh to get ready for tomorrow.

Dirty Dango talks about how he has money now and doesn’t need to be the dancing clown again. He doesn’t like wrestlers texting him but he’ll happily take money to not show up. The idea of shaking hands with sweaty awkward 18-35 year old men in some armory somewhere sounds like ALL KINDS of fun. A 5X Dirty Dango shirt won’t cover up the smell so take a shower ok? He doesn’t care about winning the Digital Media Title. If he wins it, he’ll list it on eBay and use the proceeds to go to Hawaii. With a girl. This stuff is glorious.

Champagne Singh vs. Heath

Shera is here with Singh. Heath takes him into the corner for some forearms to start but Shera offers a distraction. That lets Singh snapmare him into the ropes to start banging up the ribs, giving Singh a target. Heath slips out of a powerbomb and hits a powerslam, setting up the Wake Up Call for the pin at 2:51.

The Design promises war with Sami Callihan, Jake Crist and whomever else they can find. Yeah yeah blood and violence and carnage and all that good stuff.

Here is Joe Hendry to say he’s ready to face the man who broke his nose, Sheldon Jean. That would be the reality star under the tutelage of another reality star, Kenny King. It isn’t that simple for Jean, especially because we believe.

Joe Hendry vs. Sheldon Jean

Non-title and King is here with Jean. Hendry takes Jean down fast to start but a King distraction lets Jean get in a kick to the face. We take a break and come back with Hendry powering out of a guillotine choke and hitting a suplex. The fall away slam looks to set up the Standing Ovation but King offers a distraction. Not that it matters as a powerbomb sets up the Standing Ovation finishes Jean off at 7:32.

Rating: C. Jean meets the description of a good hand and that should be enough to keep him on the roster for a long while to come. Eventually he’ll get a win or two and that is all he needs to make him a bit of a star. Hendry on the other hand has so much charisma and now he is backing up up with a better look and the ability in the ring.

Post match Hendry calls out Dirty Dango, who appears to say that he hates pro wrestling. He’ll pass on the fighting (it’s his day off), but Hendry has a new video about Dango, who seems to have lost his mind. Hendry plans to figure out what happened to make Dango nuts, sending us into a hilarious history of Dango’s career (he started by pinning Chris Jericho 1-2-3, then he was impersonating a cop with Breeze, then he couldn’t get laid on Total Divas). With the song over, Jean and King jump Hendry but Santino Marella comes out to make the save with the Cobra to Jean. Those songs are AMAZING and this was great again.

Gisele Shaw and company brag about taking out Jordynne Grace and think it should be a warning to Trinity. This is her house, and rent is due. Revenge is sworn at Against All Odds.

Women’s Tag Team Titles: Death Dollz vs. The Coven

The Coven is defending. Wilde can’t do much with Jessicka to start so it’s off to Rush, who yells at King during the staredown. Rush takes her down but gets sent into the corner so King can take over. A swinging suplex gives King two but Rush gets over for the tag to Jessicka. That’s fine with Wilde, who sends her into the corner to take over as well as the Dollz can’t keep anything going here. Jessicka clotheslines her way to freedom and brings Rush back in to pick up the pace. Everything breaks down and King gets in a cheap shot to Rush, setting up a big boot/spinebuster to retain at 6:25.

Rating: C. As usual, the lack of depth in the division causes problems around here, as it’s hard to get around the fact that the division is the champs and whomever they are defending against at the moment. This should get rid of the Dollz for the time being, but who is there left for the Coven to face? I’m sure some wrestlers will be thrown together, but that doesn’t help the underlying problem.

Video on Alex Shelley becoming #1 contender and finally getting his World Title shot last August. Now he knows what it takes to come up short and that was a learning experience. We hear about the wrestlers that Shelley has mentored or influenced over the years but when is it about him? It doesn’t need to be this week, but Shelley almost has to win the title, just based off of how it has been built up.

Steve Maclin talks about all of the wrestlers who want the title but Bully Ray interrupts. Ray says he likes Maclin, who just won’t listen. Don’t worry though, because he won’t come for Maclin’s title until Slammiversary.

Killer Kelly vs. Masha Slamovich in a Dog Collar match is set for Against All Odds.

Bhupinder Gujjar vs. Trey Miguel

Non-title. Gujjar takes him down to start but Miguel hits a kick to the face. With Miguel on the floor, Gujjar loads up a dive, which is knocked out of the air. Back in and a slingshot splash sets up a Lionsault to give Miguel one. Gujjar knocks him down again but misses a frog splashes, allowing Miguel to kick him down. Miguel misses what looked to be a top rope double stomp but comes right back with the Lightning Spiral for the pin at 5:19.

Rating: C. This was just a quick “Trey Miguel is great” win before he defends the title again tomorrow. Miguel is getting pretty high up there with some of the records and it’s pretty awesome to see him doing so well. If nothing else, having someone with a consistent track record holding a title is a good thing, and I’d like to see Miguel move up a bit after losing the title.

Post match Miguel says he doesn’t respect Chris Sabin and declares himself the a different kind of champion. He promises that tomorrow, he’ll win again and there will be no “yeah but’s” this time around.

Johnny Swinger brags about how great he is in the ring and talks about his daddy, Donny Swinger, telling him “Swing Sonny”, sometimes it’s time to pass the heat onto someone else. Like Russo! Either way, he blames “crooked referees paid off by Gene Simmons and Bob Seger”. That’s why he’s going to have Zicky Dice become a referee, and then he’ll have a strap around his waist. This man is a genius.

Trinity and Deonna Purrazzo are ready to fight at Slammiversary, but they’re ready to fight Gisele Shaw and Savannah Evans tomorrow night too. It’s too bad that Jordynne Grace is out of action indefinitely, but this is a dangerous business.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

Moose/Rich Swann vs. Jonathan Gresham/Nick Aldis

Swann and Gresham start things off with Swann kicking him in the face. Aldis comes in and gets caught with a headscissors but ducks an enziguri. The King’s Lynn Cloverleaf is blocked though and it’s Moose coming in. Moose misses a charge and gets punched in the face before Aldis grabs an armbar.

We take a break and come back with Gresham hitting Moose in the ribs, allowing Gresham and Aldis to start working on the arm. Moose powers Gresham away though and it’s Swann coming back in for a rolling splash. It’s back to Moose for a heck of a whip into the corner to leave Gresham grabbing his chest, followed by a near chop to tag Swann back in.

A quick taunt of Aldis is enough for Gresham to be pulled back into the wrong corner. He slips out of what looked to be a powerbomb though and the diving tag brings in Aldis to pick up the pace. Moose gets dropped so Aldis’ top rope elbow can get two but it’s a double clothesline to put both of them down. Everything breaks down and Swann’s Lethal Injection gets two on Gresham. It’s back to Moose off a blind tag though and a powerbomb finishes Gresham at 13:31.

Rating: B-. This was a nice preview of the 8-4-1 match and that’s all it needed to be. We could be in for some interesting combinations in the match so throwing together a random tag match like this is what makes sense. Aldis continues to look good in his comeback and Swann/Gresham are both capable of doing whatever they need. Moose hasn’t been featured as much recently so this was a nice return to form.

Post match the brawl is on again, with Heath running in to help take Moose out. Aldis and Heath brawl to the floor so Swann loads up a dive, only to get caught by Bully Ray. PCO runs in for the slugout and hits the big dive through the ropes, allowing him to stand tall to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. Impact was in a really weird spot this week as they had two regular shows to build up the next monthly special. That isn’t a ton of time and they more or less opted to just go as fast as they could without going too in-depth with much of anything. Instead they had two good matches and some other stuff in the middle that worked out well enough. Tomorrow’s card has potential and I could go for seeing what they have in store. Things can get back to normal next week, and if the last few weeks are any indication, we should be in for a very nice build to Slammiversary.

Results
Chris Bey b. Jason Hotch – Rollup
Heath b. Champagne Singh – Wake Up Call
Joe Hendry b. Sheldon Jean – Standing Ovation
The Coven b. Death Dollz – Big boot/spinebuster combination to Rush
Trey Miguel b. Bhupinder Gujjar – Lightning Spiral
Moose/Rich Swann b. Jonathan Gresham/Nick Aldis – Powerbomb to Gresham

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Impact Wrestling – April 27, 2023: This Show Is Darn Nifty

Impact Wrestling
Date: April 27, 2023
Location: Rebel Entertainment Complex, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

The end of last week’s show saw a big announcement as PCO will be getting the first shot at Steve Maclin’s World Title. That alone is going to make for a heck of a showdown at Under Siege, but the card is going to need more than just one match. There are a few options available and we will probably find out some of them tonight so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

Masha Slamovich vs. Jordynne Grace

Grace shoulders her down to start and then does it again, setting up a wristlock. Slamovich tries an armbar but gets powered into the corner, where Grace hits the running Vader Bomb for two. It’s too early for the Grace Driver as Slamovich sends her into the rope for a shot to the throat. Slamovich gets in a shot to the face and rips at said face for a bonus.

There’s a neck snap across the top rope but Grace catches her in the corner and hits a MuscleBuster for two. Slamovich charges into a Michinoku driver for two more before Grace pulls her into a rear naked choke. That’s reversed into Slamovich’s choke, plus a leg trap belly to back suplex for two. They go into a pinfall reversal sequence for a series of ones until Grace stacks her up for the pin at 11:02.

Rating: B-. These two work well together, but it is kind of astounding to see how far Slamovich has fallen. Maybe it is the Russian aspect, but she has gone from what seemed to be the next big thing in the division to just kind of there. While it could still change, I’m not seeing much of a reason to believe that she is going to go further than she is right now. At least not for the time being.

We get a look back at Nick Aldis’ history in Impact, which led to him leading to see if he could be a star without being Magnus. Then he became the NWA World Champion for over 1,000 days and now it is time to see if he can still do it around here.

Joe Hendry has a broke nose. No word on how long he might be out.

Here is Steve Maclin for a chat. Maclin gets to the point: he doesn’t want to wait for Under Siege, so PCO can come out here right now. Cue Champagne Singh and Shera to jump PCO, who fights them both off. Cue Santino Marella and we have a match right now.

PCO vs. Champagne Singh

There are no seconds as PCO sends him to the floor to start. There’s the running flip dive to drop Singh but he’s back with a dropkick and Codebreaker. PCO isn’t happy with Singh bringing out money though and it’s a Backstabber out of the corner. The middle rope flipping splash connects and there’s the DeAnimator to make it worse. A reverse DDT sets up the PCOsault to finish Singh at 5:30.

Rating: C. This was what it needed to be, as PCO ran through someone who shouldn’t give him a problem. PCO has taken out much bigger stars around here and it isn’t like Singh or Shera has any real credibility. Nothing match, but PCO looked good in a pretty dominant win and that’s what they needed to do here.

Flashback Moment of the Week: Magnus b. Christopher Daniels on Impact, February 14, 2013.

The Design is mad at Sami Callihan.

The Coven uses magic to weaken Deonna Purrazzo before Taylor Wilde faces her tonight. They laugh a lot.

Here is Johnny Swinger, with Zicky Dice, to face a luchador that Dice has paid for personally. There’s a language barrier though, so Dice goes to get him.

Johnny Swinger vs. El Dinerico

I have a feeling you know what is going on here. A drop toehold and la majistral finishes Dinerico at 27 seconds.

Post break Swinger and Dice celebrate their win but Santino Marella comes in to say that doesn’t count. Swinger fires Dice, who is so upset he speaks Spanish.

Kenny King won a match on BTI and yelled at commentary.

After mocking the guy he beat, King talked to Sheldon Jean, who has untapped potential. Jean doesn’t seem interested, but King eventually intrigues him.

Design vs. Bullet Club

Non-title and it’s Angels/Kon with Deaner for the Design. Angels slugs away at Bey as commentary thankfully says that a lot of people were expecting Sami Callihan to turn on the team. Bey takes over on Angels so it’s off to Kon, who is quickly kicked in the head. Kon runs them both over though and throws Bey outside in a (possibly ankle injuring) heap. We see Santino Marella down in the back and come back to Kon putting Austin in a nerve hold.

Austin fights out of the corner and avoids a charge, setting up a kick to the face. Bey comes back in with a Code Red to Angels but Kon grabs him, setting up a springboard Russian legsweep (that was cool). With Kon on the floor, the Club take turns diving at him to limited avail. Cue Callihan to go after Deaner, leaving the Club to finally drop Kon with a double dive. Back in and the 1 2 Sweet finishes Angels at 8:26.

Rating: C+. It says a lot about the Bullet Club that they were able to get something decent out of these schmucks. The Design continues to be one of the most worthless acts in wrestling and having Callihan come out there to hurt their leader was almost cathartic in a way. Just get the feud over with so hopefully they can move on to anything else, because this is somehow getting less interesting by the week.

Santino Marella was attacked and is told he needs to take some time off. Dirty Dango resigns as assistant Director of Authority (with Santino reminding him that he never such a thing in the first place) to become DETECTIVE of Authority. Someone has to solve the mystery of who jumped Santino you see.

The Death Dollz don’t have the power to get back to the Undead Realm without the Knockouts Tag Team Titles. Crazzy Steve comes in and, after being amazed by how excited Jessicka is about meeting him, suggests that they talk to James Mitchell. Rosemary doesn’t like it but agrees.

Jody Threat vs. Seleziya Sparx

Jody drives her into the corner to start and grabs the wristlock to keep things on the mat. Back up and Threat gets sent to the apron, only to come back with a top rope seated senton. Some corner clotheslines set up a release German suplex, followed by the F416 to finish Sparx at 4:21.

Rating: C. I still do not get the appeal of Threat, who has yet to show me much of anything in her time around here. She’s not bad or having terrible matches, but rather just coming and going without making any real impression. Then again, I do like the idea of putting in some fresh names so points for at least trying something.

Killer Kelly really liked Hardcore War and wants more violence.

We get the first in a series of sitdown interviews with Frankie Kazarian. He got his break in Impact in 2003 and became a star in the X-Division. It was the tale end of the wild west of wrestling though and he didn’t want to become one of the good old boys who clutched to their spot. Then he left in 2014 after doing all kinds of things here, but management was such a mess (we get a clip of Dixie Carter clutching to Hulk Hogan’s leg, begging him to stay) that he decided to walk away. More next week after a more interesting first part than I was expecting.

Here’s what’s coming on future shows.

Knockouts Title: Taylor Wilde vs. Deonna Purrazzo

Wilde, with KiLynn King, is challenging. They circle each other for a bit to start before Wilde takes out the leg to put them both on the mat. Purrazzo reverses into an armbar but it gets broken up for an early standoff. An armdrag into an armbar has Wilde in more trouble but King offers a distraction for the break. Wilde gets in a cheap shot from behind but takes too long posing, allowing Purrazzo to try for the Fujiwara armbar. With that not working, Wilde consults her cards and we take a break.

Back with Wilde being sent outside, allowing Purrazzo to deck King. That lets Wilde get in another shot to take over, with King even getting in the neck snap of retribution. Wilde steps on the hair and pulls up like a good villain, only to be knocked into the corner. They collide in the middle for a double knockdown and they get a breather. Wilde grabs a German suplex but gets pulled into the Fujiwara armbar for the tap at 12:56.

Rating: B-. Another nice back and forth match here as Purrazzo dispatches an early challenger for the title. Wilde taking the loss doesn’t hurt her title reign with King and it was a pretty competitive match. You can probably pencil in King for a title shot of her own and I’ve heard worse ideas for everyone involved.

Post match the beatdown is on but Jordynne Grace makes the save to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. People who needed to win did so and aside from the Design, there was nothing that felt like a waste of time. In other words, it’s more of the same solid stuff from Impact that we’ve been seeing for months now. What matters is setting up Under Siege and you can see some of those matches coming from here. They still have time to set it up and odds are we’ll be seeing something more next week. For now, it’s a show that did enough good to make me want to see what happens next.

Results
Jordynne Grace b. Masha Slamovich – Rollup
PCO b. Champagne Singh – PCOsault
Johnny Swinger b. El Dinerico – La majistral
Bullet Club b. The Design – 1 2 Sweet to Angels
Jody Threat b. Seleziya Sparx – F416
Deonna Purrazzo b. Taylor Wilde – Fujiwara armbar

 

 

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Rebellion 2023: They Did What They Could

Rebellion 2023
Date: April 16, 2023
Location: Rebel Sports Complex, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

It’s back to regular pay per view around here and that should make for a good show. The injury bug has struck Impact hard though as a new World and Knockouts Champion have to be crowned tonight. Other than that we have a Hardcore War, because we just needed more Tommy Dreamer vs. Bully Ray. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Heath/Rhino vs. Champagne Singh/Shera

Singh offers Heath money to throw the match but Heath throws the money instead. Heath works on the arm to take over before it’s off to Rhino vs. Shera. Rhino gets taken into the corner and Shera hammers away, setting up some choking on the ropes. Rhino gets in a clothesline but Shera is back up to knock Heath into the barricade. The belly to belly gets Rhino out of trouble for good though as the tag brings Heath in to clean house. Everything breaks down and Singh rolls Heath up, with Shera holding the feet for the pin at 6:08.

Rating: C. Very basic match to open things up here and that’s all it needed to be. They kept things moving and while I’m not sure about the logic of having Shera and Singh win, well anything really, it wasn’t long enough to get bad and the fans are going to cheer for Rhino and Heath. Just don’t expect me to care about Singh and we’ll be fine.

Post match Rhino Gores Singh.

Pre-Show: Knockouts Tag Team Titles: The Coven vs. Death Dollz

The Dollz are challenging and it’s Rosemary and Wilde both tagging out to start. It’s way too early for the Sick Driver so Jessicka clotheslines her to the floor instead. Back in and King is sent into the corner for a running splash from Rosemary. King manages to get over for the tag to Wilde, who quickly takes over on Rosemary. A running shoulder in the corner connects and Wilde runs her over again for a bonus.

Rosemary slugs at Wilde, who gets caught with a Codebreaker to cut her right back off. An exploder to Wilde gets Rosemary out of trouble though and there’s the double tag so Jessicka can clean house. Everything breaks down and it’s quickly back to Rosemary, who gets to bite King. The spear gives Rosemary two but Wilde makes a blind tag. Rosemary hits a second spear for no count, as instead she walks into a swinging fisherman’s neckbreaker to give Wilde the pin to retain at 9:39.

Rating: C. Slightly longer match than the opener here but it didn’t make that much of a difference. The Knockouts Tag Team Titles are certainly better than either Women’s Tag Team Title in WWE but that isn’t the biggest hurdle to clear. The division needs some more teams, but the Coven still feels fresh enough to make them last for a while to come.

The opening video focuses on the World and Knockouts Titles being vacated and how we need new champions.

Tag Team Titles: Motor City Machine Guns vs. Bullet Club

The Club is defending in Ultimate X. It’s a brawl to start with Sabin getting knocked down but Shelley back off, allowing Sabin to try for the belts. With that not working, the Guns are sent outside for stereo dives from the Club. Back in and the Guns take over on, with Austin’s arm getting banged up.

Austin and Sabin climb up at the same time with the bad arm being rammed into the structure. Sabin ties up both of the Guns and Shelley goes up but gets pulled back down fast. Bey’s knee is banged up but he’s fine enough to grab a quick DDT and give everyone a much needed breather.

With everyone else on the floor, Austin busts out the big flip dive to take out both Guns. Back in and everyone gets knocked down again before all four go up for a climb at once. They all come crashing down and it’s the Art of Finesse to drop Shelley, allowing Bey to pull down the titles and retain at 13:07.

Rating: B. Hot opener as expected but there wasn’t much in the way of climbing, which made it kind of a regular match until the ending. The good thing is the people involved are able to do just about anything and make it work so this went well. I did like the lack of climbing and insanity though, as it was more about the people rather than the big crashes and spots. You don’t get that kind of thing in a match like this very often and it was nice for a change.

Commentary runs down the card as the audio quality goes down.

Steve Maclin is upset over the situation because he wanted to win the title from Josh Alexander. He spent years in a war zone and now he is ready to tag em and bag em. Oh and beat Kushida.

We recap Callihan trying to join the Design in maybe the dumbest story going in wrestling today.

Design/Callihan vs. Dirty Dango/Santino Marella/Joe Hendry

Before the match, Hendry mocks Callihan and the Design because the fans believe in him. He introduces Santino and….I still have no idea why this is supposed to be interesting. Is he really that kind of Canadian hero? Dango suplexes Angels to start and brings in Santino to wrestle Angels down. The threat of the Cobra sends Angels into the corner for the tag off to Callihan.

Santino gets taken into the corner corner so the beating can begin. A quick escape allows the tag off to Hendry though and Kon is pulled out of the air. Deaner gets suplexed and the tag brings Dango in to take over on Callihan. The Dirtbag Shuffle hits Callihan but a Kon distraction lets the villains get in a cheap shot. Dango gets beaten down in the corner but he manages to knock Angels down, allowing the hot tag off to Santino.

Everything breaks down and Hendry hits a double fall away slam, only to get caught with the Cactus Special 97. Deaner’s discus lariat hits Santino but he wants Callihan to finish him off. Callihan is handed the baseball bat….and he hits Deaner with it (thank goodness). Callihan gives him the thumbs down and walks out, leaving Santino to hit the Cobra for the pin on Deaner at 10:40.

Rating: C+. Pretty basic six man with the focus being on Santino and Callihan. That isn’t the most thrilling match but the fans being into it helped things a lot. At the very least, we’re done with the idiotic Seven Deadly Whatevers for Callihan, meaning we can finally move on to ANYTHING else. Not a great match but the fans liked it enough so it could have been a lot worse.

Tommy Dreamer is sad about his mother’s health but wants to be here anyway to fight in her honor. Dreamer is leaving a bit after tonight, but he’s ready to fight with the people he loves.

We recap PCO vs. Eddie Edwards. Eddie turned on PCO during the Honor No More days, sending PCO into a quest for revenge. For some reason Eddie has tried to bury PCO multiple times, which has been as bad of an idea as it has sounded. Now PCO wants to end Eddie for good in a Last Rites match.

Eddie Edwards vs. PCO

Last Rites (casket) match with Alisha Edwards in Eddie’s corner. PCO wastes no time in diving onto Edwards and the fight is on outside. Edwards gets in a shot though and hits his own dive to take over. They get inside for the first time, where PCO hits a running corner clothesline and a DDT.

The middle rope legdrop hits Edwards again and the Deanimator makes it worse. Back in and a chokeshove sends Edwards right back to the floor but it’s too early for the casket. Edwards gets in a shot to the arm and yep that’s dislocated. A German suplex and superkick don’t make things better for PCO so he goes outside…and slams the shoulder into the post to pop it back in.

They chop it out (with PCO opening his vest to make it easier) and Edwards is in trouble again. The PCOsault connects and Edwards gets chokeslammed onto the apron for another painful crash. Edwards gets in a shot of his own and smashes a kendo stick over PCO’s head. The Boston Knee Party connects but PCO pops back up. Cue Alisha with a shovel to the back for no avail, leaving PCO to chokeslam Eddie into the casket for the win at 13:46.

Rating: B-. PCO is not an overly complicated idea and sometimes that is what you need. In his case, you have a monster who is going to hurt people and is nearly unstoppable, which is exactly what you had here. I’m not sure what is next for PCO, but Edwards needs to go away for the time being while PCO moves off to something else. Good brawl here though, with PCO’s monster offense being great.

Trey Miguel’s promo….cannot be heard as there is no sound.

We recap Trey Miguel defending the X-Division Title against Mike Bailey and Jonathan Gresham. In short, two challengers, stupid champion, interference, triple threat results.

X-Division Title: Jonathan Gresham vs. Mike Bailey vs. Trey Miguel

Miguel is defending in an elimination match. They go with some three way grappling to start and that’s good for a three way standoff. Gresham and Bailey double hiptoss Miguel for a double two before Miguel is smart enough to bail to the ramp. The other two get to fight a bit until Miguel comes back in with an enziguri to Gresham.

Bailey is back up with a missile dropkick to Gresham and the standing shooting star gets two on Miguel. Bailey Indian Deathlocks Gresham and suplexes Miguel at the same time to crank on the leg even harder. Miguel gets dropped again and the challengers get to slug it out. Bailey poisonranas Gresham and crashes outside with Miguel in a big heap. Gresham dives onto Miguel but Bailey dives onto both of them to take over again.

Miguel cutters Bailey down and hits a big running version over the top for two on Gresham inside. Gresham is fine enough to Figure Four Bailey (that won’t work) but Miguel breaks it up with a top rope Meteora to eliminate Gresham at 9:45. Miguel figures Bailey’s four and they chop it out with the hold still on.

Bailey finally breaks out and wins a chop off until he kicks Miguel in the face. A standing flipping slam gives Bailey two and there’s the tornado kick. The Ultimate Weapon misses so Bailey sends him outside for the standing moonsault knees. Back in and the Ultimate Weapon only hits mat, allowing Miguel to roll him up with trunks to retain at 13:53.

Rating: B. Good, fast paced match here which shouldn’t be a surprise, much like holding Bailey in a pair of Figure Fours for two minutes straight making him do more flips and kicks. That is just something you know is coming from Bailey but at least now we get to move on to more of Miguel as champion. His time as champion is getting to be impressive as he is getting into the all time ranks and that can make for some very fun times.

We recap Team Bully vs. Team Dreamer. This is all about Bully Ray vs. Tommy Dreamer, which has been going on for about six months now. Ray pretended to be good, Dreamer wasn’t sure, Ray revealed he was evil, it’s time for a big fight with friends because they used to be around each other in ECW.

Team Bully vs. Team Dreamer

Bully Ray, Moose, Brian Myers, Masha Slamovich, Kenny King
Tommy Dreamer, Killer Kelly, Yuya Uemura, Frankie Kazarian, Bhupinder Gujjar

It’s basically WarGames without the cage, with the first two entrants in for three minutes. Then Team Bully (thanks to winning a match on Impact) gets an advantage for ninety seconds. All ten have to get in and then it’s first pin or submission, anything goes. Moose starts for Team Bully and Frankie Kazarian starts for Team Dreamer.

Kazarian starts fast by throwing a trashcan at Moose’s head and we’re ready to go. Moose fires back with a chop and they head outside, where Kazarian sets up a table. We’ll save that for later though as they head back inside, with Kazarian sending him into the corner. Brian Myers is in to give Ray the advantage and he sets up another table next to the first.

Bhupinder Gujjar evens things up and goes after Myers to give Kazarian a breather. The cheese grater to the head has Myers busted open (good thing he is in a white shirt) and Moose gets trashcan lidded down. Kenny King is in to uneven things again and house is quickly cleaned. Moose hits Gujjar in the head with a bottle of water and Killer Kelly makes it 3-3. That means a staple gun to Myers’ head and another shot between Moose’s legs. Then Kelly staples her own head and it’s Masha Slamovich in to give the villains control again.

Everyone else is knocked down and it’s Myers alone to face Yuya Uemura as things are evened up. The good guys clear the ring again and it’s Bully Ray to complete his own team. Ray is smart enough to take his time so the rest of his team can get back up and jump Team Dreamer. Kelly is held down but it’s Dreamer to even things up with the kendo stick. Dreamer goes after the leg….and everyone else gets involved for a ten person chain submission for quite the visual.

Kelly and Slamovich have a chair duel until Ray shoves Kelly off the top. Moose spears Ray by mistake and Uemura hits Moose with a high crossbody. The Killer Klutch has King in trouble but Slamovich breaks it up and Snow Plows Kelly. Dreamer piledrives Slamovich but here are the Good Hands to jump him.

Kazarian breaks that up and let’s bring in a ladder. The Good Hands come back in to go after Kelly, who beats them up like the goons they are. Kazarian cutters Skyler through the tables at ringside but Ray low blows Dreamer inside. Another table is set up….and here are a bunch of referees to beat Ray up for revenge from the last few weeks. Dreamer drops Ray and, with the referees holding the ladder, goes up to splash Ray through said table for the win at 25:07.

Rating: C. What is there to say here? You have a bunch of other people there to keep everyone else warm for the sake of Ray vs. Dreamer. This is a feud that has been going on for months for reasons I still don’t quite get, but hopefully this should wrap it up. The hardcore stuff was kind of there but it was all basic stuff with only a few spots of note. It was fine enough and far better than Ray vs. Dreamer on their own, but it has been a story that wasn’t interesting for months and wasn’t much better here in the blowoff.

We recap the World title match. Josh Alexander had to vacate the title after about a year long reign, setting up #1 contender Steve Maclin vs. Kushida, the best remaining option. There isn’t much heat on the match, but it is a case where they didn’t have another choice and are doing the best they can.

Impact Wrestling World Title: Kushida vs. Steve Maclin

For the vacant title and former World Champion Nick Aldis is here as a surprise guest commentator. Aldis says he is officially back in Impact, which is better than nothing for him. Kushida goes right at him to start fast but it’s way too early for the Hoverboard Lock. Back up and Kushida rides him into a headlock without much trouble as Maclin can’t get anything going here.

Kushida can’t hit the basement dropkick so he takes it over into a wristlock instead. The Hoverboard Lock is blocked again and this time Maclin sends him throat first into the top rope to take over. A backbreaker gives Maclin two and Kushida’s back is sent into the post. They head outside with Maclin grabbing a suplex and dropping an elbow off the apron, though he might have banged up his knee in the process.

We hit the chinlock with a knee in Kushida’s back as Maclin certainly has a target. An Angle Slam is blocked though and Kushida hits a running kick to the arm. A discus forearm sets up the small package driver to give Kushida two but Maclin is fine enough to crotch him on top. They go to the ramp where Kushida hits a running shot to the arm but said arm is fine enough for a German suplex back inside.

A buckle bomb into a sitout powerbomb gives Maclin two and he puts Kushida on top. That is hardly the best idea as Kushida pulls him down into a cross armbreaker. Maclin gets over to the rope for the break and they crash out to the floor again. Back in and Maclin’s spear in the corner sets up the KIA for two, leaving Maclin frustrated.

Maclin goes up top but dives into the Hoverboard Lock, only to break it up with some forearms to the head. Another Hoverboard Lock goes on but Maclin reverses into a Death Valley Driver into the corner. Kushida gets the Hoverboard Lock AGAIN, only to have Maclin reverse into another KIA for the pin and the title at 18:27.

Rating: B. That was about the only way they could go as Kushida was a filler opponent for Maclin. That isn’t something they could really get around given the circumstances and it wound up being a rather good match anyway. Maclin has been built up to be champion for months now and it was the only conclusion they had here. Kushida going for the arm time after time but having Maclin escape it at every turn worked well. They were limited in what they could do and made it work as well as possible.

Post match Maclin insists that Scott D’Amore come out and hand him the title. D’Amore does so and gets hit in the face with the belt. Nick Aldis gets in and glares Maclin off. Aldis works just fine for a first challenger, as Maclin has already run through a lot of the other options.

Here are some upcoming major events. Multiverse United 2 is on August 20.

We recap the Knockouts Title match. Again the champion, Mickie James in this case, was forced to vacate the title due to injury so we have the #1 contender and a former champion fighting for the title.

Knockouts Title: Deonna Purrazzo vs. Jordynne Grace

For the vacant title. They shake hands to start and Grace grinds away on a headlock. Purrazzo cranks away on the arm and has Grace in some early pain. Some armdrags into a running hurricanrana has Grace in more trouble but she sends Purrazzo outside. That means a dropkick through the ropes and a Jackhammer on the floor as Purrazzo is rocked.

A rather stalled suplex gives Grace a slightly delayed two but she has to roll out of a Fujiwara armbar. The Queen’s Gambit on the ramp is broken up so Purrazzo settles for a moonsault to the floor instead. Back in and the Queen’s Gambit is broken up again but Purrazzo is able to grab a Koji Clutch.

Grace powers out and drops her hard with a Vertebreaker for all things for two. The Grace Driver is blocked and she pulls Purrazzo into a rear naked choke. They trade some strikes but Purrazzo pulls her into the Fujiwara armbar. Make that the Venus De Milo but a foot on the rope is good for the break. Back up and Grace’s spinebuster gets two, followed by a Grace Driver for the same (as Rehwoldt is getting into these near falls). Purrazzo counters a superplex into a sunset bomb, setting up the Queen’s Gambit for the pin and the title at 17:06.

Rating: B. This is an interesting way to go as I would have expected Grace to win but Purrazzo is a completely acceptable choice as well. Grace had held the title for a long time until James took it off of her but it has been a bit since Purrazzo. They could go quite an interesting direction with Purrazzo fighting off some challengers and hurting some arms, so this was certainly a smart idea. It was a good match as well, similar to Kushida vs. Maclin actually, but with the submission holds having more success until Purrazzo managed to pull it off.

They hug to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. They were in a rough place here as the two biggest matches had stories thrown together over the last two weeks. That left the main story of Bully Ray vs. Tommy Dreamer with four friends each. Given what they had, they had put on a rather strong show, which has been the case for their bigger events in recent memory. Good show here, and worth some extra praise all things considered.

Results
Champagne Singh/Shera b. Heath/Rhino – Rollup to Heath
The Coven b. Death Dollz – Swinging fisherman’s neckbreaker to Rosemary
Bullet Club b. Motor City Machine Guns – Bey pulled down the titles
Santino Marella/Dirty Dango/Joe Hendry b. The Design/Callihan – Cobra to Deaner
PCO b. Eddie Edwards – Chokeslam into the casket
Trey Miguel b. Jonathan Gresham and Mike Bailey – Rollup with trunks to Bailey
Team Dreamer b. Team Bully – Splash through a table to Ray
Steve Maclin b. Kushida – KIA
Deonna Purrazzo b. Jordynne Grace – Queen’s Gambit

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – March 23, 2023: Leave The Memories Alone

Impact Wrestling
Date: March 23, 2023
Location: Sam’s Town Live, Las Vegas, Nevada
Commentators: Tom Hannifan, Matthew Rehwoldt

It is the night before Sacrifice and we are eight days away from Multiverse United. That means it is time to build up both shows at the last minute, as there is still some work that needs to be done. The good thing is that both shows already have quite a bit set and now the final touches can be applied. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening recap looks at Steve Maclin vs. Josh Alexander, including Maclin costing Alexander/Rich Swann/Frankie Kazarian a six man tag last week.

Opening sequence.

The Design vs. Time Machine

Callihan is here with the Design. Kushida squares up to Kon to start but Sabin comes in as well, allowing Kon to clothesline both of them down. Deaner comes in and gets struck down by the Guns, only to take Sabin into the wrong corner. It’s off to Angels to trade chops with Sabin before a leg lariat puts Sabin down. Sabin ties Angels up though and Kushida/Shelley kick Angels’ arms out to take over.

There’s a running hesitation dropkick in the corner to hit Angels again and Shelley stays on the bad arm. Kushida snaps the arm across the top and it’s off to a double arm crank. Sabin comes back in but gets taken into the wrong corner so Angels can choke a bit. A sunset flip gets two on Deaner and Sabin dives over to Kushida for the tag. House is quickly cleaned and everything breaks down, with Kushida and Shelley taking over on Deaner’s arm for a change.

The handspring kick knocks Kon off the apron and Kushida hits a big dive to the floor to take out a variety of people. We take a break and come back with Angels (favoring his arm) and Kushida trading their forearms. Deaner kicks Kushida in the head and Kon’s spinebuster sets up Angel’s frog splash for two. A double clothesline Doomsday Device gets two on Kushida as Shelley makes the save.

Everything breaks down again and Angels is left alone, setting up a triple Dream Sequence. A triple kick in the head looks to set up Skull And Bones but Deaner makes the save. Hold on though as Callihan gets in to protect Deaner, leaving Callihan to get taken down as well. Angel’s dive is loaded up but he gets pulled into the Hoverboard Lock. Sabin kicks the arm away from the ropes and Angels taps at 18:50.

Rating: C+. Well that was….long. I’m not sure why anyone thinks there is a need for a Design match to go nearly twenty minutes but thankfully Time Machine was there to balance things out a bit. The action was fine but I can’t understand what is supposed to be interesting about the Design. It would be great to finally get to whatever they’re setting up with Callihan, because there has been almost nothing interesting so far and I have no reason to believe that is going to change.

The Coven is happy to be the new Knockouts Tag Team Champions and like magic.

Raj Singh and Shera are rich and like it in Las Vegas. The former is so rich that he’s now Champagne Singh as we just keep up the stereotypes.

Eddie Edwards is in the back with Kenny King and talks about how he has to get rid of PCO. That’s why he has brought in help, with King talking about how they realized they needed each other at Jay Briscoe’s mama’s house. PCO was never family like them, so King is going to take PCO out at Sacrifice.

Savannah Evans vs. Deonna Purrazzo

Gisele Shaw and Jai Vidal are here with Evans. Purrazzo slugs away to start but gets shoved down without much effort. There’s a running splash to crush Purrazzo in the corner and Evans throws her right back out. Purrazzo manages to snap off a running hurricanrana though and Evans crashes out to the floor. The baseball slide drops Evans again but a Shaw distraction lets Evans send Purrazzo into various things.

We take a break and come back with Purrazzo still in trouble as Shaw is rather pleased. A running shoulder in the corner sets up a butterfly suplex as Purrazzo is getting crushed here. The chinlock goes on as Shaw’s slapping the mat over and over again sounds like someone knocking on a door.

Purrazzo fights up and gets a boot up in the corner before going after the arm. That doesn’t work so Purrazzo hits a running knee into a Russian legsweep. Now the Fujiwara armbar can go on, with Evans making it over to the rope. Back up and Evans snaps off a suplex but gets kicked in the head. Evans is sent to the apron but the distractions are on. Evans accidentally kicks Vidal down and Purrazzo gets rid of Shaw, setting up a crucifix to pin Evans at 13:51.

Rating: C. This was another long match and mostly a squash until Purrazzo beat up two people at once to beat Evans. Purrazzo is geared up for her match with Shaw at Sacrifice and now we should be in for a showdown tomorrow night. Evans continues to look like a monster for most of her matches but then comes up short in the end, which could go somewhere in the future.

Post match Evans lays Purrazzo out and Shaw helps out with the beating. This goes on for a bit and no one saves Purrazzo.

Flashback Moment Of The Week (They still do these?): The Motor City Machine Guns b. Team 3D and Beer Money at Sacrifice 2010.

The Death Dollz are mad at losing the Knockouts Tag Team Titles with Taya Valkyrie trying to calm the other two down. They need a new plan! Jessika isn’t having that and goes after the Coven right now, only to find….a casket. Jessika opens it up and finds….well we’re not sure as Taya slams it shut. A hand reaches out of the casket and pulls Taya in. Where to you ask? AEW.

Bully Ray/Masha Slamovich vs. Tommy Dreamer/Mickie James

For those of you who needed a preview of Dreamer vs. Ray. The men start things off with Ray going after Mickie instead. Ray wants Mickie to come in and she does exactly that after about a minute of staring. Slamovich comes in for the slugout about two minutes in but Mickie plants her with a flapjack. It’s off to Dreamer for some arm cranking before Mickie comes back in, only to have Ray pull her down by the hair.

Ray comes in for a slam as commentary is quiet for a lot of long stretches. Mickie slips away though and hands it back to Dreamer for right hands in the corner. A cutter gives Dreamer two with Slamovich making the save. The top rope seated senton drops Slamovich and Mickie plays D-Von with a WHAT’S UP (ax handle version). Everything breaks down and Ray loads up a table as Mickie dives onto Slamovich. The distraction lets Ray hit Dreamer low, setting up a piledriver for the pin at 9:26.

Rating: C. This worked when Mickie and Masha were in there, with Ray being ok enough. I’m completely with caring about anything Dreamer does, but at least his stuff was kept short. What mattered here was having the two matches set up, as strange as it is that seeing Ray pin Dreamer before they have a first blood match. Then again having them in what is very possibly the main event of a show in 2023 is strange enough.

Post match Ray loads up a powerbomb on James but here is Jordynne Grace to break it up. Grace and Ray stare each other down and Grace spears….Mickie by mistake as Ray moves.

Rich Swann and Frankie Kazarian are in the back with Swann being upset about last week. Kazarian wants him to go find Josh Alexander and settle this now. Post break Swann goes into Alexander’s locker room and finds Steve Maclin. Swann yells, with Maclin saying maybe Alexander wanted him here. Swann is confused.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

Dirty Dango/Joe Hendry vs. Moose/Brian Myers

Before the match, Dango insists that we believe in Hendry and the fans seem pleased. Hendry headlocks Myers to start and then runs him over with a shoulder. A delayed suplex drops Myers and Dango comes in as Myers rolls into the corner. Moose comes in and takes Dango into the corner but Hendry comes in to clear the ring. Hendry and Dango have two words for us….but Dango has to be reminded that they aren’t SUCK IT.

We take a break and come back with Moose sending Dango into the corner and knocking Hendry off the apron. Myers drops Dango as the alternating beatdowns continue. Moose charges into a boot in the corner though and a middle rope corkscrew uppercut gives Dango a breather. The tag brings in Hendry to clean house and a pop up powerbomb gets two on Myers. Everything breaks down and Moose spears Hendry down. Myers’ Roster Cut finishes Hendry at 13:44.

Rating: C+. Nice tag match here which set up the title match on Friday. Hendry continues to feel like a star and someone who could be a big deal if he is given the chance at some point down the line. Seeing him get pinned in a tag match is kind of a big deal as Hendry has been such a star, but he’ll be fine if he retains the title at Sacrifice.

Josh Alexander goes into his locker room and finds Rich Swann, who wants to know why Steve Maclin was here. Alexander, who is remarkably calm about two people apparently having been in his locker room, is off to find out what is going on here.

Here is Josh Alexander to talk about Steve Maclin. Alexander has seen Maclin leave a trail of bodies around here and he can respect that. What he can’t respect is the allegation that he is ducking Maclin. All that makes Maclin is someone complaining and a…..forgotten son. Cue Maclin to say that yes he is afraid to fail because he doesn’t want to go all the way back to the bottom.

He is obsessed with winning the Impact World Title and we see clips of Maclin watching Alexander’s matches from the shadows during his title reign. Alexander says he respects Maclin so bring it on right now. Maclin says nah, because he’s going to do it in Alexander’s hometown at Rebellion.

Overall Rating: C+. The wrestling wasn’t great here but it did a nice enough job of building up Sacrifice. That is trickier than it seems though, as the show isn’t the biggest in the world. The main event very well may be Dreamer vs. Ray, as the only other real option is Mickie vs. Grace. Once that is out of the way though, we’re on to Rebellion and that should work well.

So……you might need to forget a good bit of this show, as both Josh Alexander (torn tricep) and Mickie James (undisclosed) are injured and have been forced to vacate their titles. The Knockouts Title will be determined at Sacrifice and the World Title at Rebellion, with Steve Maclin facing Kushida. No word on what happens to the Multiverse United card. Egads that’s horrible, as they might have just lost their two top stars at once.

Results
Time Machine b. The Design – Hoverboard Lock to Angels
Deonna Purrazzo b. Savannah Evans – Crucifix
Bully Ray/Masha Slamovich b. Mickie James/Tommy Dreamer – Piledriver to Dreamer
Moose/Brian Myers b. Dirty Dango/Joe Hendry – Roster Cut to Hendry

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – March 16, 2023: The Balancing Act

Impact Wrestling
Date: March 16, 2023
Location: Sam’s town Live, Las Vegas, Nevada
Commentators: Tom Hannifan, Matthew Rehwoldt

Sacrifice is next week and the card, while is looking a bit stacked, is coming together. That means we are likely to get some more build towards Tommy Dreamer vs. Bully Ray this week, as that is likely headlining the show. Otherwise, the six man tag featuring Time Machine should see some more setup as well. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

In the desert, PCO screams for Eddie Edwards to come fight him.

Opening sequence.

Mike Bailey/Jonathan Gresham vs. Decay

Steve has to bail to the ropes to escape Gresham to start but a bite of the hand has Gresham in trouble. Bailey comes in and is sent outside just as fast, leaving Decay to double team Gresham down in the corner. Gresham gets sent into the corner but forearms/dropkicks his way to freedom. Bailey comes in to backflip a bit and kicks Steve down. There’s the running shooting star for two on Steve…who bites on Bailey’s boot.

The boot is fine enough for the bouncing kicks but Steve hits a clothesline for the double knockdown. Taurus comes in for his huge backbreaker into a pop up Samoan drop for two on Bailey. Everything breaks down and Gresham sends Steve outside, leaving Bailey to kick Taurus in the head for one. Steve and Gresham fight on the floor as Bailey hits the spinning kick, setting up the Ultimate Weapon for the pin on Taurus at 6:19.

Rating: C+. This was shorter than I was expecting but Bailey didn’t managed to no sell a bad knee so he is doing better than usual. Other than that, it was the partners who don’t quite like each other teaming together to beat a midcard team, which isn’t a horrible stretch. Bailey is a popular enough star to carry the opener, and the Ultimate Weapon does look painful so had a nice start here.

Post match Gresham and Bailey seem a bit testy with each other but respect is shown.

Josh Alexander, Frankie Kazarian and Rich Swann are ready for the Bullet Club tonight. They’ve been successful on their own and now it’s time to succeed together. They trust each other, but here is Steve Maclin to interrupt, with Swann not seeming pleased.

Gisele Shaw says she didn’t lost last week and blames Deonna Purrazzo. Revenge is coming at Sacrifice. Johnny Swinger and Zicky Dice come in and suggest Swinger faces….interviewer Gia Miller? Instead, he’ll face Jai Vidal.

Steve Maclin vs. Heath

Heath starts fast with some running forearms but gets sent into the corner to cut him off. Maclin runs him over with a good shot to the face until a backdrop sends him to the floor. We take a break and come back with Maclin beating him up at ringside and choking on the rope. A backbreaker gives Maclin two and we hit the abdominal stretch. Heath fights out and slugs away, including the jumping knee and powerslam for two. Maclin cuts off a bulldog though and ties him in the Tree of Woe, setting up the spear. KIA finishes Heath at 12:04.

Rating: C+. I’m still kind of amazed at what Heath has been doing in Impact as he has turned into a rather reliable in-ring star without doing much of the comedy. Granted he never really got the chance to show what he could do so maybe this has been there all along. That being said, this was all about getting Maclin another win on his path to the World Title shot and that went well.

The Death Dollz are ready to retain the Knockout Tag Team Titles but Taya says Jessika might be too much of a liability. Taya and Rosemary can handle this themselves, which (after Jessika leaves), seems to be because they think Jessika could be swayed.

PCO has walked from the desert to Las Vegas, shouting or Eddie on the way.

Jonathan Gresham calls Mike Bailey his sidekick but Bailey says he isn’t forgetting Gresham beating him. They’ll run it back at Sacrifice.

Johnny Swinger vs. Jai Vidal

Zicky Dice, Savannah and Gisele Shaw are all here too. Swinger doesn’t think much of Vidal to start and his offer of a test of strength is answered with a dropkick. Vidal drops an elbow to send Swinger into the corner but a charge misses. Dice grabs Vidal’s leg and gets ejected, with the distraction letting Swinger choke on the rope. Evans breaks up the camel clutch and gets ejected, along with Shaw. Cue Deonna Purrazzo to jump Shaw, leaving Vidal to hit a running dropkick to finish Swinger at 3:22.

Rating: C. Total comedy match here and yeah it worked well, as does almost everything that Swinger does. Having him lose over and over is a funny idea, as he is still trying to find someone he can beat. Vidal was fine enough in the ring, but this was all about Swinger (and Purrazzo in the end) and he delivered.

Deaner talks about Callihan’s sixth step when Callihan storms in to yell about last week. Callihan’s sixth step is about taking punishment, which he’ll do. Deaner seems to have an idea. Here’s an idea: WRAP THIS STORY UP ALREADY!

PCO arrives at the arena, still screaming for Eddie Edwards.

Mickie James comes up to Tommy Dreamer, who has requested that they have a mixed tag against Bully Ray and Masha Slamovich next week. Jordynne Grace comes in to say this is a bad idea and promises that she’s still coming for the title.

Here is Eddie Edwards for a chat. He has been thinking a lot and is ready to let the past be in the past. Everything that has happened before is over and it is time for him to focus on himself and his future in Impact. We look at someone in a car saving Eddie from PCO last week and…here is PCO. Before he can make it to the ring though, Kenny King comes up from behind and hits him with a shovel, allowing Edwards to come up for the double team.

Commentary speculates that King was driving Edwards’ getaway car last week before PCO sits up on the ramp. The brawl is on and PCO gets crushed between the steps and post. That’s broken up and PCO (bleeding from the back of the head) cleans house, only to have King grab a Blockbuster. The chair is put over PCO’s head and Edwards crushes it with a kendo stick. This isn’t going to end well for them is it?

Santino Marella is in the back with….Vladimir Kozlov of all people. They’re happy to be back together and then Kozlov leaves. Dirty Dango comes in and can’t say Kozlov’s name. That’s enough for SAY HIS NAME AND HE APPEARS, so here is Joe Hendry, who wants Brian Myers. Santino makes the match so Dango can gush over what a Hendry fan he is. It’s such a big deal that Santino makes Hendry and Dango against Myers and Moose.

Knockouts Tag Team Titles: The Coven vs. Death Dollz

The Dollz (Rosemary/Taya Valkyrie) are defending and Jessika is here with them. Taya crossbodies King down to start and hands it off to Rosemary for a suplex. Wilde comes in to slug away, earning a bite to the hear from Rosemary. Everything breaks down and the Coven is clotheslined to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Rosemary fighting out of a chinlock but getting pulled down by the hair. Wilde chokes in the corner but Rosemary manages a quick Upside Down. King is knocked away and the hot tag brings in Taya to clean house. The running hip attack and running knees in the corner hit King for two but Wilde hits a Fameasser over the ropes. Everything breaks down but King breaks up the Road To Valhalla. Instead Wilde hits a kick to the head and King’s pumphandle flipping faceplant connects for the pin and the titles at 11:32.

Rating: C+. Taya appearing on this week’s Dynamite didn’t exactly help with the result but well done on trying to make some new stars out of nowhere. Wilde has been trying to find her way back to prominent since her return and King has only been around for a few weeks. Nice match too, without Jessika playing into the finish as they seemed to telegraph.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

Josh Alexander/Rich Swann/Frankie Kazarian vs. Bullet Club

Kazarian flips out of Bey’s wristlock to start but Bey kicks him into the corner. There’s a running chop and it’s Austin coming in. That’s fine with Kazarian, who sends Bey outside and grabs Austin’s arm. Swann comes in and is quickly dropped with a springboard dropkick, allowing Austin to grab a headlock (as is the customary followup to a springboard missile dropkick). That’s broken up as well and it’s off to Kenta vs. Alexander, which has the fans’ approval. They slowly slug it out until everything breaks down, with Bullet Club being sent to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Bey kicking Swann in the head and motioning that Swann is asleep. Austin and Bey use some precision kicks to put Swann down for two but Bey misses a legdrop. Kenta isn’t having any of this tagging stuff though and kicks Swann right back down. Swann manages a kick though and it’s Kazarian coming back in to really clean house.

Everything breaks down and Alexander comes in to strike on Bey. The hurricanrana is countered into a powerbomb on Bey and Swann adds the middle rope 450. Austin makes the save and it’s time for the exchange of kicks to the head. Swann flips off the apron onto Swann but gets taken down by Bey.

The slingshot dive is loaded up but Kazarian pulls bey out of the air into a cutter onto the pile (that was great). Back in and Swann hits an ax kick to Bey and Kazarian adds the slingshot DDT to Austin. Kenta knees Swann down but gets dropped by Alexander. Cue Steve Maclin for a distraction though and Alexander gets kicked down. The Art of Finesse into the Fold finishes Swann at 17:57.

Rating: B. This was rolling by the end and the Maclin distraction was about all they could have done to get out of this without something rather screwy. You don’t want the new champs winning and Kenta probably isn’t getting pinned, so having Maclin there was the best way out. Rather good match too, with talented wrestlers getting time to do what they can.

Overall Rating: B-. Impact is somehow managing to build towards three shows (granted one of them is in name only for the most part) at once and thankfully they didn’t bother with that much about Tommy Dreamer vs. Bully Ray. That feud doesn’t need any more time and hopefully they can have their match and move on (yeah I know there’s no way that’s it). Other than that, you had some build towards Sacrifice, which is looking rather strong. Good show this week, as we should be in for a nice few weeks coming up.

Results
Mike Bailey/Jonathan Gresham b. Decay – Ultimate Weapon to Black Taurus
Steve Maclin b. Heath – KIA
Jai Vidal b. Johnny Swinger – Running dropkick
The Coven b. Death Dollz – Pumphandle flipping faceplant to Valkyrie
Bullet Club b. Josh Alexander/Rich Swann/Frankie Kazarian – Fold to Swann

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – February 23, 2023: Dang They’re Good

Impact Wrestling
Date: February 23, 2023
Location: Osceola Heritage Park, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

It’s the go home show for No Surrender and the card is set up. There is one thing though that we need to cover, which involves who gets to talk first in a live edition of Busted Open Radio. Therefore, we have a Beat The Clock Challenge between Bully Ray and Tommy Dreamer. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Motor City Machine Guns vs. Jonathan Gresham/Mike Bailey

Non-title and Gresham takes Shelley down by the leg to start. Bailey comes in and kicks away at said leg, with Gresham and Bailey taking turns on it. Shelley manages to knock Bailey outside though and it’s the Guns taking over for a change. Back in and the limping Shelley strikes away at Bailey, who comes right back with the bouncing kicks to Sabin.

Gresham and Sabin slug it out until Gresham does one of those stupid looking deals where he sends the Guns together and kicks Sabin, making him dragon screw legwhip Shelley. The Guns are back up with a Death Valley Driver/neckbreaker combination, followed by a Magic Killer for two on Gresham. Gresham suplexes Sabin and brings Bailey back in for the kicks, plus an Indian Deathlock to Shelley.

With that broken up, Shelley escapes Skull And Bones, leaving Gresham to Figure Four Shelley. That’s broken up as well and the Guns are sent outside for the double dive. Back in and Gresham gets the Figure Four again, with Bailey hitting the moonsault knees to Sabin. Bailey gets knocked down though and Sabin powerbombs him onto Gresham for the save. Gresham hits Bailey by mistake and the Guns strike away (gee Shelley’s knee healed up fast), setting up the Dirt Bomb for the pin on Gresham at 12:56.

Rating: B. This was the fast paced and all action match, though Bailey’s horrendous selling issues were spreading around here. The Guns did their thing and won as they should have, with Gresham and Bailey continuing to have their issues. It was the kind of fast paced match that you should open a show with, but my goodness sell the leg already.

Video on Rich Swann vs. Josh Alexander, with Swann wanting to get back to the top of the mountain. Alexander isn’t so sure, but does want Swann to get a title shot.

We look at Gisele Shaw and Jai Vidal getting chilied by Deonna Purrazzo on Before The Impact.

Deonna Purrazzo mocks Gisele Shaw for being bad luck and promises to break her arm at No Surrender. B****.

Beat The Clock Challenge: Tommy Dreamer vs. Jason Hotch

John Skyler is here with Hotch and promises that Dreamer is going down to one good hand. Dreamer misses a charge into the corner to start and a neckbreaker gives Hotch two. Hotch goes up top but gets caught in a super Death Valley Driver for the pin at 1:15. Well that was quick.

Joe Hendry had a meet and greet earlier today and the fans are behind him against Moose at No Surrender.

Taya Valkyrie vs. Allysin Kay

Jessika, Rosemary and Marti Belle are here too. They fight into the corner to start with Valkyrie getting the better of things and grabbing something like a reverse Koji Clutch on the mat. With that broken up, Valkyrie hits a spear for two as Kay can’t get much going so far. Kay gets kicked down in the corner to set up the running knees for two.

We take a break and come back with Kay whipping Valkyrie into the corner for a change, only to miss a charge. Valkyrie hits her hip attack, earning herself one heck of a right hand. A not so great blue Thunder Bomb gives Valkyrie two and we hit something like an STF. The rope gets Kay out of trouble and she reverses a sunset flip into a sunset driver for two. Belle offers a distraction so Kay can nail a kick to the head. With Rosemary dealing with Belle, the AK47 finishes Valkyrie at 10:34.

Rating: C. It’s good to give Kay, who is already a former Knockouts Champion, a reheating as she hasn’t been around in a long time. You need to have her built back up to make the Hex a reasonable threat to the Death Dollz and they made that work here. Valkyrie was working here and dominated most of the match too, making Kay look better in the process.

Santino Marella emcees a contract signing between Josh Alexander and Rich Swann. Alexander says Swann doesn’t have it in him, sending Swann into a speech about how he was hurt before but came back through all of his injuries. He’ll win the title tomorrow, but here is Steve Maclin to say he’s getting it anyway. Referees break up the ensuing fight.

Deaner/Callihan vs. Yuya Uemura/Frankie Kazarian

The rest of the Design is here too. Deaner has Callihan start with Kazarian and tells him to do the right thing. Callihan decks Kazarian to start so now Deaner is willing to fight for himself. Kazarian strikes his way out of trouble and brings Uemura in for an armbar. Callihan comes back in and Deaner gets in a cheap shot from the apron to take over. With the chinlock broken up, Kon pulls Kazarian off the apron to prevent the tag but Deaner misses a Swan Dive.

That’s enough for the tag to Kazarian as the pace picks way up. The springboard spinning legdrop hits Deaner but Callihan is back in with a suplex. Kazarian rolls between them and brings Uemura back in as everything breaks down. With Deaner down in the corner, Callihan tags himself back in and sends Uemura outside. A spinebuster drops Kazarian but Deaner tells Callihan to stop the Cactus Driver. The distraction lets Kazarian grab the chickenwing for the win at 9:43.

Rating: C+. Fast paced match here but egads the Callihan/Design stuff is falling flat. It feels like something we have seen so many times and there is no reason to care about whatever they do. Callihan still feels like something of a star, but the Design is as much of a dollar store version of the evil cult as you can get. Just get on with Callihan turning on them and move on already.

Video on Mickie James defending against Masha Slamovich at No Surrender, with Jordynne Grace looming over the whole thing.

Callihan wants to know how that was Deaner’s step #5, with Deaner saying it was about loyalty. Callihan is still in this, and tomorrow night, he can prove himself at No Surrender. Just remember: the Design chooses him, not the other way around.

Beat The Clock Challenge: Bully Ray vs. Bhupinder Gujjar

The clock is set at 1:15 and Ray hasn’t even bothered to put his knee pads on properly. The Good Hands immediately come in for a distraction so Ray can hit Gujjar with a chain for the pin at 30 seconds to win the challenge. I’ll take something short from Ray and Dreamer as this sets up the two of them talking at No Surrender.

Post break Tommy Dreamer gives Gujjar a pep talk.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

X-Division Title: Trey Miguel vs. Crazzy Steve

Steve, with Black Taurus, is challenging in Monster’s Ball and they’ve both been held without food, water or light for twenty four hours. There are weapons at ringside because we need to ramp up the violence. Steve chops away to start and takes him to the floor for the hard right hands.

We take a break less than a minute in (as that has now swept through wrestling) and come back with Steve being sent face first into some chairs on the floor. A big chair shot only hits post though and Steve sends him into the chairs instead. Back in and Miguel hits a fast running dropkick to take over again, meaning it’s time for a chain. More weapons are thrown in but Steve staple guns Miguel low for a breather. Steve Cannonballs into Miguel, in a trashcan, in the corner as we take another break.

Back again with Miguel grabbing a swinging neckbreaker for a breather of his own. A fork (yes a fork) to Steve’s face is blocked but Steve is busted open anyway. It’s time for the bag of tacks (of course) but Steve blocks the Lightning Spiral. The Black Hole Slam onto the tacks gets two on Miguel, with Steve pulling him up at two. That takes too long though and Miguel kicks away, setting up a stomp to the back to send Steve into the tacks.

It’s table time (because of course) but instead a double clothesline puts them both into the tacks again. With nothing else working, Miguel pulls out a metal spike, only for Steve to pull out Janice (a 2×4 with nails sticking out). With Miguel terrified, Steve Death Valley Drivers him through the table in the corner for two.

Steve gets caught on top though and a chair to the head puts him in more trouble. A quick Canadian Destroyer onto the tacks rocks Miguel again though and a delayed cover gets two. Janice to the forehead busts Miguel open even more but he gets in a low blow. A Roll of the Dice through a barbed wire table (with Miguel hitting back first) knocks Steve silly and retains the title at 22:31.

Rating: B. Your taste in hardcore/violent wrestling is going to determine everything here. There wasn’t much of anything new here but they did beat each other up and it felt like the big finish to the feud. Miguel gets to prove he can go in a different direction and looks stronger as champion as a result. The ending left a good bit to be desired, but they had a very violent match on the way there.

Overall Rating: B. The middle left a good bit to be desired, but with a pair of solid matches, Dreamer vs. Ray being kept under two minutes combined and a nice push towards No Surrender, this was another very nice use of two hours. I don’t even know why I’m surprised anymore, but Impact is rapidly approaching being the best weekly wrestling show. They have put in the work and made their show that much better, so well done on all sides with another quality show this week.

Results
Motor City Machine Guns b. Jonathan Gresham/Mike Bailey – Dirt Bomb to Gresham
Tommy Dreamer b. Jason Hotch – Super Death Valley Driver
Allysin Kay b. Taya Valkyrie – AK47
Frankie Kazarian/Yuya Uemura b. Callihan/Deaner – Chickenwing to Callihan
Bully Ray b. Bhupinder Gujjar – Right hand with a chain
Trey Miguel b. Crazy Steve – Roll of the Dice through a barbed wire table

 

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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