On This Day: September 6, 1986 – Superstars (Debut Episode): That Awkward Period Before Hogan vs. Andre
Superstars of Wrestling
Date: September 6, 1986
Location; Providence Civic Center, Providence, Rhode Island
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jesse Ventura, Bruno Sammartino
So I was going to do the September 13 episode when I found out that it was the second episode of the series. This would be during Hogan vs. Orndorff in what was an absolutely huge feud and indirectly led into Hogan vs. Andre the following year. I’d expect a lot of squash matches here which is what Superstars was known for as it replaced Championship Wrestling. Let’s get to it.
We open with an opening. There’s a good idea.
The announcers run down the people on the card tonight.
Ricky Steamboat/Sivi Afi vs. Roger Kirby/Terry Gibbs
The heels try to jump Steamboat and Afi but are quickly atomic dropped to the floor. Steamboat starts with Gibbs but it’s quickly off to Kirby. Now it’s quickly back to Ricky. Gibbs manages an elbow to take Afi down and the heels pound on Afi in the corner. A headbutt from Kirby puts him down but gets rolled up for two to stop the momentum. There’s the hot tag to Steamboat and house is cleaned. He suplexes Kirby down and Afi hits a top rope splash for the pin. Short but not half bad.
Video on Billy Graham training, set to Bad to the Bone by George Thorogood and the Destroyers. Graham, with a freaking tarantula crawling over his face, says he’s coming for Studd and Bundy.
Hart Foundation vs. Koko B. Ware/Paul Roma
This is Koko’s debut. It’s also Ventura’s first appearance since Wrestlemania too. Neidhart and Koko start things off and Koko armdrags him down. Off to Roma who doesn’t have as much luck because he isn’t that good. Bret, who is that good, comes in and pounds him down with ease. Ventura praises him and we get an inset promo from Koko who has nothing to say. While he’s talking the Hart Attack pins Roma. Vince calls it bad officiating but it seemed fine to me.
Koko saves Roma from a beating post match.
MSG house show ad. The Machines, including Hulk Machine, are ready for Heenan and his boys. Hogan trying to sound Japanese is borderline offensive and I’m not even Japanese.
Honky Tonk Man is coming and he wants to beat up Paul Orndorff. He was a face when he debuted until the fans were actually asked if they would give him a vote of confidence. In other words, the fans decided if he was a face or a heel. Now there’s something different.
Ron Shaw/Pete Doherty vs. Hillbilly Jim/Cousin Luke
Luke isn’t that good but he furthered the hillbilly gimmick for Jim. Jim and Shaw start us off and the Hillbilly throws him around for a bit before it’s off to Luke. Luke doesn’t do that well so Jim comes in and mauls them both, finishing Doherty with the bearhug. Total squash.
Meadowlands house show ad. Heenan isn’t worried about Steamboat because he has Mr. Wonderful ready. Orndorff knows what a monkey wrench is, and just like Steamboat’s martial arts, that won’t mean a thing.
Kamala vs. Tommy Sharpe
This is Kamala’s return apparently. Kamala’s manager King Curtis tells us about how great Kamala is. Sharpe gets in more offense than you would expect here, but at the end of the day he’s a jobber and Kamala is a returning monster. The big splash ends this in about two minutes.
Time for the Flower Shop with Adrian Adonis which replaced Piper’s Pit and set up a great angle between the hosts. Piper is the guest and he’s still on a cane due to the knee injury he suffered earlier in the knee. He says he’s not here tonight to fight (despite implying Adonis is female) but he does have a letter. They’re the ratings for the segments on WWF TV, and apparently the Flower Shop is killing them. He gives Jimmy Hart another letter which says that the Flower Shop will be canceled next week so that Piper’s Pit can return. Adrian freaks and it’s on next week.
Rougeau Brothers vs. Mike Fever/Bob Bradley
Bradley was in the last show I reviewed and it was the only time I had ever heard of him. I love little things like that. The Rougeaus aren’t fabulous yet but they take Bradley apart to get things going. We listen to some French commentary for no apparent reason. Total dominance again with Ray getting the pin after the Cannonball that the Quebecers would use as their finisher years later.
We get a clip from a previous Flower Shop where Heenan tries to prove that one of the Machines is Andre the Giant but they keep switching places to confuse him.
Big John Studd/King Kong Bundy vs. Corporal Kirschner/SD Jones
The Corporal and Studd start us off with the Corporal hitting and moving. He pounds on Studd and goes for a slam but Bundy breaks it up. Bundy comes in and uses fat man offense but it’s back to Studd quickly. Jones comes in and it’s Wrestlemania all over again. The Avalanche gets the quick pin. Literal squash. Even Vince says this match wasn’t that good.
Another MSG ad. Harley Race says that Tito Santana is in way over his head.
Vince tells us what’s coming next week and we’re out.
Overall Rating: D+. For a debut episode this was pretty forgettable, but back then it wouldn’t have been seen as all that bad. The idea here was to pump up the house shows so on that front, it did pretty well. It’s hard to criticize these shows because they’re not meant to be some masterpiece and a show that’s going to get you to watch next week like Raw is today. It wasn’t that bad and at 45 minutes, how can I really complain?
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On This Day: June 13, 2006 – ECW on Sci-Fi: This Isn’t ECW
ECW on Sci-Fi
Date: June 13, 2006
Location: Sovereign Bank Arena, Trenton, New Jersey
Attendance: 5,100
Commentators: Joey Styles, Taz
So this is the debut of ECW on Sci-Fi which I found online out of boredom. Since I’m getting dangerously close to the end of the ECW PPVs, I figured I’d do the first and last shows of ECW on Sci-Fi and TNN just for the heck of it. This show is considered a miserable failure so let’s find out why. The main event is a battle royal to determine who fights Cena at Vengeance. ECW came back officially two days before this so it’s brand new and this is the big debut. Let’s get to it.
We open with a recap of the second One Night Stand which was where the If Cena Wins We Riot sign debuted. Cena says he’ll be on ECW tonight, thereby killing ECW on its opening night. This was supposed to be the real ECW but you could tell that was never going to happen a few seconds after it debuted.
Heyman opens us up here and brings out RVD. They even have the hole in the brick wall entryway. RVD is WWE Champion here, having won it two nights ago. His voice reminds me of a less depressed Vin Diesel for some reason. They keep saying he’s the champion without saying WWE. Heyman declares him the ECW World Champion. Taz says no one knows what RVD is feeling. I think that should say no one knows why RVD never won the title in the original ECW. He says he’s just going to defend both titles. Van Dam wants the other one because it spins.
And here’s the #1 contender: Edge. Edge is ok because he could have made it in the original ECW I think. He cost Cena the title at Vengeance so he’s WAY over. Edge spears him after complimenting him. He goes through the crowd and Cena is behind him. RVD and Cena fight over who gets to beat up Edge. This of course allows Edge to escape. And remember, this is ECW. Pay no attention to the argument going on over the WWE Title with WWE guys.
After a house show ad, Heyman gives a speech to the locker room and says they’re invading Raw on Monday. You know it might work better if you didn’t say it on national TV.
The Zombie vs. The Sandman
And this right here is where ECW died completely. Since they could only get on Sci-Fi, they tried to get more sci-fi stuff on the show, hence this. And cue Sandman to not Metallica. Styles and Taz don’t even try to take this seriously. This is like a bad indy show joke or something. Sandman canes the heck out of him to a great pop and the White Russian Leg Sweep ends this in like 10 seconds. Dust flew off of Zombie. No rating obviously.
Kelly is an exhibitionist and wants to take off all of her clothes.
DX is coming back. On ECW. Shoot me. Better yet shoot Heyman as he doesn’t deserve this.
We see the whole Taz destroying King match from the PPV two days ago. It’s a 30 second squash but we see the whole thing, including intros.
Kurt Angle vs. Justin Credible
Angle would be in TNA later this year so what does that tell you about their luck? He had been the big guy sent to ECW to make them credible which to be fair is a good idea since he was in ECW before he was in WWE if you squint really hard when you look at it. Also his personality fits for ECW so it’s not that much of a stretch. Angle of course destroys Justin by throwing him all over the place and treating him like a video game character. Justin shoves him and Angle hits something close to the Tazmission to make him tap in maybe 90 seconds, which is somehow the longest match of the night, tripling the second place offering so far. No rating again obviously. He calls out Orton for a rematch at Vengeance.
Heyman says he’s throwing out everything he had planned and we’re having an extreme battle royal for the shot against Cena at Vengeance.
Read the Rise and Fall of ECW.
An unnamed character (Kevin Thorn) looks up at the ECW sign as Joey and Tazz say he couldn’t be what they think he is (vampire).
Kelly comes out to strip for us. She only has one name so far. She gets down to her underwear and unhooks her bra and puts her hands over her chest and leaves. Was there a point to that at all?
Extreme Battle Royal
Tommy Dreamer, Sabu, Big Guido, Little Guido, Stevie Richards, Big Show, Roadkill, Danny Doring, Al Snow, Tony Mamaluke, Balls Mahoney
So despite Heyman saying 10 there are 11. Sure why not. The weapons are all on the floor which completely goes against the logic of a battle royal. Balls has a bad cover of AC/DC. Show has hair here. That’s not something I’m used to. Wait didn’t he get his head shaved before this? Everyone runs from Show and it’s almost impossible to keep track of who is eliminated and who is just running. Roadkill takes a fallaway slam and we go to a break. No one has been eliminated since they all went through the ropes. We get some token weapons shots and I want this to end.
Taz tries to play this off as being more extreme than anything else and I feel sorry for him. Sabu sets up a table. Everyone jumps Show and it does nothing at all. Show puts out Snow. And Doring. Uh Richards too. Might as well say Roadkill too. Balls Mahoney is number five. This is all in a row so I’m not skipping anything. Dreamer goes after Show with something made of metal and of course it does jack. He goes through a table on the floor. It’s Show, the FBI and Sabu. Show puts all three of the non-fake Arabians out in about 45 seconds and then Sabu hits him while he’s on the ropes to win it.
Rating: F. Oh sweet mama this was bad. Show literally eliminated everyone other than Sabu in less than 4 minutes. There’s domination and then there’s this. One of the worst battle royals ever to fittingly close out one of the worst hours ever.
Overall Rating: G. This is one of those weird shows that actually goes beyond failing and blazes new territory. Other than the main event if you want to call it that, the longest match was less than 100 seconds long. One match had a zombie and one was from a PPV so it wasn’t even new. They had no freaking clue what they were doing with this and it showed badly. They more or less redid the whole thing the next week when this bombed so terribly. Not even worth it for the historical value. Terrible show.
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Thunder – January 8, 1998 (First Episode Redo): When Nitro Is the Better Show, You’re In Trouble
Thunder
Date: January 8, 1998
Location: Ocean Center, Daytona Beach, Florida
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Lee Marshall, Bobby Heenan
Due to the success of 1997, WCW decided to add another show to it’s TV schedule so here’s their new idea. Tonight is a souped up show as debuts often are, as we have a Cruiserweight Title match, an update on the world title situation after the debacle at Starrcade, and the Larry Zbyszko vs. Eric Bischoff match from Starrcade in full, which I’m sure wouldn’t get on the nerves of the fans who paid for the show. Let’s get to it.
The announcers talk about how they’re sure Sting is the world champion.
Randy Savage is supposed to be in the opening match but he isn’t here yet. Instead, here’s a clip from Nitro of the NWO arriving in two different limos. We also get Bischoff saying there are no problems.
Tony shows us a clip of the attorney from Nitro (a week ago according to him, which is Tony speak for three days ago) saying that anyone, either WCW or NWO, who violates a WCW policy will be fined and/or suspended. Nick Patrick was suspended at least until tonight to show us that WCW was serious.
Now we see the end of Nitro with the NWO getting in a fight to end the show.
Chris Adams vs. Randy Savage
Adams is a British guy who trained Steve Austin and brought the superkick to America. That’s more or less the extent of his major accomplishments but he’s in the first match ever on Thunder for some reason. Savage jumps him from behind as we hear about WCW never losing Nitro in the first place. Adams is sent to the outside so Savage can drop him on the barricade. Chris comes back with a whip into the post and gets back in which distracts the referee, allowing Luger to come out and cave in Savage’s head with a chair. Adams gets the pin to open the show with a huge upset.
JJ Dillon comes out but we go to a break before anything can happen.
Here are Hogan and Bischoff with something to say. Something I forgot to mention earlier: the set is a big stone wall that had an opening broken into it by some lightning earlier. Shouldn’t the show be called WCW Lightning then? Actually Thunder is perfect: it’s a bunch of noise with nothing of substance. It’s perfect for WCW at this point.
Hogan and Bischoff take forever to get to the ring where Bischoff introduces Hogan as the world champion. Apparently every good looking woman on the beach said that Hogan was the real world champion and tonight we’ll see the tape proving it. Hollywood is the only heavyweight champion in the world and he’s just too big and too tanned.
Here’s JJ again to say that Randy Savage wins the match because of Luger’s interference. Luger comes out and rants against JJ because only now is WCW doing anything after a year and a half of the NWO doing whatever they want. He says that WCW is going to band together and do whatever they want. Point for keeping continuity at least.
Louis Spicolli vs. Rick Martel
Louis cranks on the arm to start but is quickly sent to the floor with a clothesline. Back in and a few dropkicks send Spicolli right back to the floor. They get back in again and Spicolli pounds him down as the Flock heads to their seats. Martel fires off a cross body for two and a left hand to the ribs to stagger Louis. Another dropkick misses but Martel punches Spicolli down and hooks the Quebec Crab for the win.
Rating: D+. For a guy who hasn’t been around in years, Martel really does look smooth out there. At first I wasn’t wild on him coming back as he was just Rick Martel: guy in leather jacket, but they’re pushing him as someone with ring experience who can beat guys with relative ease, which is actually working for him.
We get a clip from Starrcade of Hall saying Nash wouldn’t be there, earning a beating from Giant in the process. I still don’t get why they didn’t just have Hall be a replacement as he would be more than adequate to fill in.
Tenzan vs. Ohara
Tenzan is a guy from Japan who is apparently part of the NWO. Tenay talks about how Ohara is like Ray Traylor as he was thrown out of the Japanese NWO and is now a freedom fighter. He pounds away on Tenzan to start but gets slammed down. The fans don’t seem pleased as Tenzan hits a spinwheel kick for no cover. Ohara comes back with a clothesline and powerbomb for two but gets caught in a middle rope chop. Tenzan hits a swan dive to end a quick match.
We get another clip from Nitro of the very good Bret and Flair segment where they argue over who is better and say each others’ catchphrases.
Ric Flair vs. Chris Jericho
Before the match, Jericho apologizes for his recent behavior and to present Penzer with another new suit jacket. Flair takes him into the corner to start and there’s our first WOO. Jericho takes it to the mat with a headlock and a monkey flip sends Flair down. Chris takes too much time though and gets poked in the eye by the master, giving Flair control.
A clothesline puts Flair back down though and there’s the Flair Flip in the corner. Jericho dropkicks him off the apron before Flair can run to the top but the Lionsault misses as Flair gets back in. Flair asks for the time and hits a low blow before stomping away a bit. Jericho hits a quick backdrop and a top rope elbow for two but a missile dropkick misses. Figure Four ends Jericho quick.
Rating: C-. This was a glorified squash for Flair but he looked very smooth out there which is a good thing for Jericho. At this point, Jericho was nowhere near what he would become so a match with Flair was one of the best things that could happen to him. That’s what veterans are supposed to do and Flair did it more than almost anyone.
Jericho freaks out again post match.
Giant vs. Meng
As Meng comes out, Tony announces Flair vs. Bret for Souled Out and yes, he says it might be the biggest announcement in the history of our sport. Meng hits a clothesline but gets caught in a powerslam to put him down. A backdrop puts Meng down and Giant vs. Nash is announced for the PPV as well. Tony basically says that it’ll actually happen this time, which is a pretty pathetic way to push a match. “Remember last time when we said it would happen and it didn’t? Well this is nothing like that and we’ll actually do what we say!” Meng avoids a splash and fires off some strikes, only to be chokeslammed down for the fast pin.
Goldberg vs. Steve McMichael
It’s just Goldberg now. Mongo goes after him on the floor to start and whips Goldberg into the steps before heading in to be stomped. A gorilla press powerslam puts Mongo down and there’s a rolling leg lock for good measure. Mongo gets to the rope and goes after the leg as well before hitting a middle rope clothesline for two. McMichael calls for the tombstone but gets caught in the spear and Jackhammer for the pin. Heenan points out that Goldberg is undefeated.
Tag Titles: Steiner Brothers vs. Buff Bagwell/Konnan
Scott and Buff start things off and it’s time to pose. Buff takes him down with a hiptoss but Scott drills him with some clothesline and a tiger bomb. Konnan is knocked to the floor as well and it’s time to stall. Off to Konnan vs. Rick with Konnan being rammed stomach first into the buckle, only to take Rick down with a clothesline. Back to Buff who jumps right into a belly to belly and it’s a double tag to bring Scott back in. Everything breaks down and Rick loads up the bulldog, but Scott goes to the other corner for the Frankensteiner for the pin to retain.
Rating: D+. Nothing to see here but the main idea is the Steiners having issues. That’s probably the best move as the Steiners had been a big deal for about nine years at this point, so there wasn’t much else that could be done with the team. Scott had been the one WCW wanted to push for years anyway so it really isn’t surprising when you think about it.
Here’s Larry Zbyszko vs. Eric Bischoff from Starrcade to tick off the fans and fill in time, because if there’s one thing WCW doesn’t have, it’s a roster big enough to fill in a full show.
Bret Hart comes out to be guest referee. There’s no pyro, there’s no big entrance, there’s nothing but generic music and Bret casually walking to the ring. The theory is that he’s in the NWO but that’s never been confirmed yet.
Eric Bischoff vs. Larry Zbyszko
This should have been Hall vs. Larry, as those two had been talking trash to each other for months. However, Larry only gets Hall if he beats Eric here tonight. If Eric wins, the NWO controls Nitro. Larry is in good shape here considering he’s 46 and hasn’t wrestled regularly in about five years. Bret checks them for weapons and we’re ready to go. Bischoff has the body of a 15 year old girl. He is however a black belt in karate so you can expect a lot of striking.
Bischoff hits a quick shot to Larry’s head and immediately celebrates. More strikes follow and Eric heads out to the floor for consultation with Hall. Back in and Larry hits some shots of his own and Eric is scared. Larry goes after him again and Eric hits a spin kick to the side of the head that knocks Larry down. That’s enough for Zbyszko and he charges at Eric and takes him down to the mat. Bret admonishes him for pulling Eric’s hair, so Larry puts on a sleeper and a headscissors, both of which are broken up for being chokes.
Off to a standing figure four but Eric quickly makes a rope. The damage is done though and Larry goes after the leg. Makes sense against a karate guy. Bret keeps Larry away from Eric and the announcers PANIC. Imagine that: a referee following the rules. Eric is sent into the steps and takes a brief walk around the ring. Back in and Bret blocks a right hand from Larry, allowing Eric to get in a kick to the head. Bischoff fires more kicks with Larry on the ropes, although Bret is fine with them.
Eric is starting to kick himself out though as the kicks are getting weaker and weaker each time. Now he fires rights and lefts in the corner as Larry is just covering up. Eric can barely move now and Larry shakes everything off. A suplex puts Bischoff down and Larry ties him in the Tree of Woe. Hall pulls something out of his pocket and loads it into Eric’s shoe, WITH BRET LOOKING RIGHT AT THEM. I mean, he knows what’s going on so why not LOOK THE OTHER WAY???
Anyway, Eric kicks him in the head with the loaded foot and the piece of metal goes flying. Bret isn’t supposed to see it, despite watching it fly through the air. Eric celebrates, so Bret hits both Bischoff and Hall before putting Hall in the Sharpshooter, which is Bret’s version of the Scorpion Deathlock. Larry chokes Eric for a bit and is declared the winner, presumably by DQ.
Rating: F. This was in the second to last spot on the biggest show of the year and featured the boss of the company who has no skill whatsoever in the ring. Larry did fine all things considered, but to waste this spot on this match and to waste BRET HART’s in ring debut on this match is absolutely ridiculous in every sense of the word.
Back on Thunder now here’s Larry to talk about his match with Hall at Souled Out. Larry talks about how he understands why Hall hates his guts after Larry took Hall so far ten years ago. Now instead of being a world champion, Hall is on the ship of fools heading towards Larry Land. Larry can still bench press 405lbs, drive to the golf course and shoot a 73 and then beat Hall from one side of the ring to the other. He’s wrestled in front of royalty around the world and just like he did in 1980, he’ll change the NWO at Souled Out. This was actually a pretty decent promo and I remembered it from when I watched this live.
We recap Ray Traylor being thrown out of the NWO and beaten down by Hogan.
Ray Traylor vs. Scott Hall
Traylor shoves him down to start but Hall comes back with the driving shoulder blocks. He slaps Ray in the back of the head and gets sent into the corner and pounding away for his efforts. A corner splash crushes Hall and it’s off to a bearhug to waste some time. The referee takes a shot to the eye so we head to the floor for a bit with Hall hitting Traylor in the face with his NWO tag title belt. That’s only good for two and the middle rope bulldog gets the same for Hall. Scott heads to the floor to grab a chair but Larry comes out to stop him. The distraction lets Traylor hit the Boss Man Slam for the upset pin.
Rating: D+. The match was barely anything but it did advance the Larry vs. Hall feud so I can’t complain all that much. I’m not sure how many people wanted to see Zbyszko vs. Hall but at least it was a feud that had the time to build up for a few months. Speaking of having the time, can we get a match to last five minutes tonight?
Cruiserweight Title: Juventud Guerrera vs. Ultimo Dragon
Dragon is defending. Apparently Scott Steiner has been fined $5000 for hitting the referee during the tag match. The announcers didn’t even notice it so it’s likely a bit extreme. Feeling out process to start with both guys hitting some quick strikes until Juvy hits a springboard spinwheel kick for two. Guerrera misses a splash in the corner and gets stomped down as we actually talk about the match for a bit. Actually scratch that as it’s time to talk about Starrcade a bit more.
Dragon misses a handspring elbow in the corner as the fans think this is boring. Juvy loads up a top rope rana but gets crotched to the floor instead. Dragon hits a moonsault to the floor but injures his knee in the process. They head back in and Dragon hits a release German suplex for two but the top rope rana is countered again. Juvy knocks him to the mat but dives into a dropkick fro Dragon, only to come back with a quick DDT. The Juvy Driver sets up the 450 for the pin and a new champion.
Rating: C. Pretty slow paced stuff here as their high spots weren’t connecting all that well. Dragon only held the belt for about eight days here so it’s kind of hard to care about the title changing this fast. It’s not a bad match but again at just under five minutes we didn’t have time to get invested in it at all.
Here’s Bret Hart for a chat. Bret says that he’s called himself the best there is, was and ever will be and he means it and he’s meant it every time. He’s accomplished a lot over his career but now he has to prove himself all over again. Bret isn’t going to stop calling himself the best ever….and here’s Flair with a rebuttal. Ric talks about how he’s heard from a thousand people since last week (what’s with that? It was three days ago, not last week but people have been saying it all show long) that they want to hear Bret say his catchphrase to Flair’s face.
Bret does just that, sending Flair into a rant about how Bret used to sit in the front row with a box of popcorn wanting to be like Ric Flair. Bret has been a five time WWF Champion, but while he was doing that, Flair was wrestling Brody in Singapore for an hour. Not exactly but Flair is on a roll so I can forgive him. Flair yells about how he’s been around the world but Bret says he’ll have to beat the man to prove that he’s the man. Ric says it’s not just beating the man, but it’s staying the man. More good stuff here, questionable history aside.
Lex Luger vs. Scott Norton
Norton jumps him on the floor to start before heading inside for a clothesline. A backbreaker puts Luger down but a splash misses in the corner. Luger vs. Savage is announced for the PPV and here’s Buff for a distraction. Norton hits the shoulder breaker for two but Luger comes back with the forearm. The Rack ends Norton quick in a rare loss for him.
Bagwell gets Racked too as Savage comes in, only to be chased off by Luger as well.
We get the video from Starrcade of the “fast count” and it’s just not fast no matter how they look at it.
We get the long awaited footage from Nitro, which shows the referee going down and being replaced by Nick Patrick (who was suspended earlier on Nitro), who counts three on Sting as Hogan rolls him up with a handful of tights. Hogan and Sting keep fighting because that’s just what they do, so Sting makes Hogan give up in the Scorpion, which counts now because the original referee never called for the bell, which is the exact same thing that happened at Starrcade but this is almost over so I’m not going to think about it that hard. JJ comes out and gets decked by Bischoff, causing a huge brawl between WCW and the NWO.
Back live again with JJ in the ring for his decision. Before the decision is announced we need Hogan in the ring. Naturally he brings out about five guys (to no music for some reason) for the big meeting. JJ also asks Sting to come to the ring and bring the belt. The official decision is that the title is vacant until they can make an official decision. Sting says JJ has no guts and that Hogan is a dead man, which is the first thing he’s said in a year (ignoring what he said at Starrcade of course). Heenan swears this is a victory for the NWO because that’s what you do when anything happens in WCW.
US Title: Diamond Dallas Page vs. Kevin Nash
Hogan comes out with Nash (despite both guys being in the ring for the previous segment) as Tony swears that we’ll stay with the show no matter what, a mere ten minutes after we saw footage from a match that ended after Nitro went off the air. Page cranks on the arm to start but Nash elbows him down. The champ gets two off a swinging neckbreaker but Nash goes to Page’s eternally injured ribs to take over.
A clothesline in the corner has Page down again and the side slam gets two. Nash pounds on him in the corner and sends Page outside for more very slow pounding. Page is sent into the steps as Hogan tells him to give up. Back in and Nash hits Snake Eyes and an elbow drop for two. Page fights out of another Snake Eyes attempt and loads up the Diamond Cutter but Hogan hits him in the ribs for the DQ.
Rating: D+. We were clearly just killing time until the DQ here which is the case in almost all WCW main events anymore. Hogan being out there was kind of surprising as it could have been any WCW goon for the same ending. Also any bets on there being no mention of a fine to Hogan for doing the same thing Luger did earlier?
Post match Giant comes out to break up a Jackknife and brawls with Nash to end the show.
Overall Rating: D+. Take everything that was good about Nitro from this week and throw it out the window. Let’s see: short and mostly meaningless matches, the title situation is a mess (and will get messier) and the NWO’s problems aren’t even mentioned. In other words, the focus is all back on the NWO being some kind of a threat and WCW needing to pull together, which is exactly what it’s been since like March. This show wasn’t terrible, but man was it frustrating.
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Thunder
Date: January 8, 1998
Location: Ocean Center, Daytona Beach, Florida
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Lee Marshall, Bobby Heenan
Due to the success of 1997, WCW decided to add another show to it’s TV schedule so here’s their new idea. Tonight is a souped up show as debuts often are, as we have a Cruiserweight Title match, an update on the world title situation after the debacle at Starrcade, and the Larry Zbyszko vs. Eric Bischoff match from Starrcade in full, which I’m sure wouldn’t get on the nerves of the fans who paid for the show. Let’s get to it.
The announcers talk about how they’re sure Sting is the world champion.
Randy Savage is supposed to be in the opening match but he isn’t here yet. Instead, here’s a clip from Nitro of the NWO arriving in two different limos. We also get Bischoff saying there are no problems.
Tony shows us a clip of the attorney from Nitro (a week ago according to him, which is Tony speak for three days ago) saying that anyone, either WCW or NWO, who violates a WCW policy will be fined and/or suspended. Nick Patrick was suspended at least until tonight to show us that WCW was serious.
Now we see the end of Nitro with the NWO getting in a fight to end the show.
Chris Adams vs. Randy Savage
Adams is a British guy who trained Steve Austin and brought the superkick to America. That’s more or less the extent of his major accomplishments but he’s in the first match ever on Thunder for some reason. Savage jumps him from behind as we hear about WCW never losing Nitro in the first place. Adams is sent to the outside so Savage can drop him on the barricade. Chris comes back with a whip into the post and gets back in which distracts the referee, allowing Luger to come out and cave in Savage’s head with a chair. Adams gets the pin to open the show with a huge upset.
JJ Dillon comes out but we go to a break before anything can happen.
Here are Hogan and Bischoff with something to say. Something I forgot to mention earlier: the set is a big stone wall that had an opening broken into it by some lightning earlier. Shouldn’t the show be called WCW Lightning then? Actually Thunder is perfect: it’s a bunch of noise with nothing of substance. It’s perfect for WCW at this point.
Hogan and Bischoff take forever to get to the ring where Bischoff introduces Hogan as the world champion. Apparently every good looking woman on the beach said that Hogan was the real world champion and tonight we’ll see the tape proving it. Hollywood is the only heavyweight champion in the world and he’s just too big and too tanned.
Here’s JJ again to say that Randy Savage wins the match because of Luger’s interference. Luger comes out and rants against JJ because only now is WCW doing anything after a year and a half of the NWO doing whatever they want. He says that WCW is going to band together and do whatever they want. Point for keeping continuity at least.
Louis Spicolli vs. Rick Martel
Louis cranks on the arm to start but is quickly sent to the floor with a clothesline. Back in and a few dropkicks send Spicolli right back to the floor. They get back in again and Spicolli pounds him down as the Flock heads to their seats. Martel fires off a cross body for two and a left hand to the ribs to stagger Louis. Another dropkick misses but Martel punches Spicolli down and hooks the Quebec Crab for the win.
Rating: D+. For a guy who hasn’t been around in years, Martel really does look smooth out there. At first I wasn’t wild on him coming back as he was just Rick Martel: guy in leather jacket, but they’re pushing him as someone with ring experience who can beat guys with relative ease, which is actually working for him.
We get a clip from Starrcade of Hall saying Nash wouldn’t be there, earning a beating from Giant in the process. I still don’t get why they didn’t just have Hall be a replacement as he would be more than adequate to fill in.
Tenzan vs. Ohara
Tenzan is a guy from Japan who is apparently part of the NWO. Tenay talks about how Ohara is like Ray Traylor as he was thrown out of the Japanese NWO and is now a freedom fighter. He pounds away on Tenzan to start but gets slammed down. The fans don’t seem pleased as Tenzan hits a spinwheel kick for no cover. Ohara comes back with a clothesline and powerbomb for two but gets caught in a middle rope chop. Tenzan hits a swan dive to end a quick match.
We get another clip from Nitro of the very good Bret and Flair segment where they argue over who is better and say each others’ catchphrases.
Ric Flair vs. Chris Jericho
Before the match, Jericho apologizes for his recent behavior and to present Penzer with another new suit jacket. Flair takes him into the corner to start and there’s our first WOO. Jericho takes it to the mat with a headlock and a monkey flip sends Flair down. Chris takes too much time though and gets poked in the eye by the master, giving Flair control.
A clothesline puts Flair back down though and there’s the Flair Flip in the corner. Jericho dropkicks him off the apron before Flair can run to the top but the Lionsault misses as Flair gets back in. Flair asks for the time and hits a low blow before stomping away a bit. Jericho hits a quick backdrop and a top rope elbow for two but a missile dropkick misses. Figure Four ends Jericho quick.
Rating: C-. This was a glorified squash for Flair but he looked very smooth out there which is a good thing for Jericho. At this point, Jericho was nowhere near what he would become so a match with Flair was one of the best things that could happen to him. That’s what veterans are supposed to do and Flair did it more than almost anyone.
Jericho freaks out again post match.
Giant vs. Meng
As Meng comes out, Tony announces Flair vs. Bret for Souled Out and yes, he says it might be the biggest announcement in the history of our sport. Meng hits a clothesline but gets caught in a powerslam to put him down. A backdrop puts Meng down and Giant vs. Nash is announced for the PPV as well. Tony basically says that it’ll actually happen this time, which is a pretty pathetic way to push a match. “Remember last time when we said it would happen and it didn’t? Well this is nothing like that and we’ll actually do what we say!” Meng avoids a splash and fires off some strikes, only to be chokeslammed down for the fast pin.
Goldberg vs. Steve McMichael
It’s just Goldberg now. Mongo goes after him on the floor to start and whips Goldberg into the steps before heading in to be stomped. A gorilla press powerslam puts Mongo down and there’s a rolling leg lock for good measure. Mongo gets to the rope and goes after the leg as well before hitting a middle rope clothesline for two. McMichael calls for the tombstone but gets caught in the spear and Jackhammer for the pin. Heenan points out that Goldberg is undefeated.
Tag Titles: Steiner Brothers vs. Buff Bagwell/Konnan
Scott and Buff start things off and it’s time to pose. Buff takes him down with a hiptoss but Scott drills him with some clothesline and a tiger bomb. Konnan is knocked to the floor as well and it’s time to stall. Off to Konnan vs. Rick with Konnan being rammed stomach first into the buckle, only to take Rick down with a clothesline. Back to Buff who jumps right into a belly to belly and it’s a double tag to bring Scott back in. Everything breaks down and Rick loads up the bulldog, but Scott goes to the other corner for the Frankensteiner for the pin to retain.
Rating: D+. Nothing to see here but the main idea is the Steiners having issues. That’s probably the best move as the Steiners had been a big deal for about nine years at this point, so there wasn’t much else that could be done with the team. Scott had been the one WCW wanted to push for years anyway so it really isn’t surprising when you think about it.
Here’s Larry Zbyszko vs. Eric Bischoff from Starrcade to tick off the fans and fill in time, because if there’s one thing WCW doesn’t have, it’s a roster big enough to fill in a full show.
Bret Hart comes out to be guest referee. There’s no pyro, there’s no big entrance, there’s nothing but generic music and Bret casually walking to the ring. The theory is that he’s in the NWO but that’s never been confirmed yet.
Eric Bischoff vs. Larry Zbyszko
This should have been Hall vs. Larry, as those two had been talking trash to each other for months. However, Larry only gets Hall if he beats Eric here tonight. If Eric wins, the NWO controls Nitro. Larry is in good shape here considering he’s 46 and hasn’t wrestled regularly in about five years. Bret checks them for weapons and we’re ready to go. Bischoff has the body of a 15 year old girl. He is however a black belt in karate so you can expect a lot of striking.
Bischoff hits a quick shot to Larry’s head and immediately celebrates. More strikes follow and Eric heads out to the floor for consultation with Hall. Back in and Larry hits some shots of his own and Eric is scared. Larry goes after him again and Eric hits a spin kick to the side of the head that knocks Larry down. That’s enough for Zbyszko and he charges at Eric and takes him down to the mat. Bret admonishes him for pulling Eric’s hair, so Larry puts on a sleeper and a headscissors, both of which are broken up for being chokes.
Off to a standing figure four but Eric quickly makes a rope. The damage is done though and Larry goes after the leg. Makes sense against a karate guy. Bret keeps Larry away from Eric and the announcers PANIC. Imagine that: a referee following the rules. Eric is sent into the steps and takes a brief walk around the ring. Back in and Bret blocks a right hand from Larry, allowing Eric to get in a kick to the head. Bischoff fires more kicks with Larry on the ropes, although Bret is fine with them.
Eric is starting to kick himself out though as the kicks are getting weaker and weaker each time. Now he fires rights and lefts in the corner as Larry is just covering up. Eric can barely move now and Larry shakes everything off. A suplex puts Bischoff down and Larry ties him in the Tree of Woe. Hall pulls something out of his pocket and loads it into Eric’s shoe, WITH BRET LOOKING RIGHT AT THEM. I mean, he knows what’s going on so why not LOOK THE OTHER WAY???
Anyway, Eric kicks him in the head with the loaded foot and the piece of metal goes flying. Bret isn’t supposed to see it, despite watching it fly through the air. Eric celebrates, so Bret hits both Bischoff and Hall before putting Hall in the Sharpshooter, which is Bret’s version of the Scorpion Deathlock. Larry chokes Eric for a bit and is declared the winner, presumably by DQ.
Rating: F. This was in the second to last spot on the biggest show of the year and featured the boss of the company who has no skill whatsoever in the ring. Larry did fine all things considered, but to waste this spot on this match and to waste BRET HART’s in ring debut on this match is absolutely ridiculous in every sense of the word.
Back on Thunder now here’s Larry to talk about his match with Hall at Souled Out. Larry talks about how he understands why Hall hates his guts after Larry took Hall so far ten years ago. Now instead of being a world champion, Hall is on the ship of fools heading towards Larry Land. Larry can still bench press 405lbs, drive to the golf course and shoot a 73 and then beat Hall from one side of the ring to the other. He’s wrestled in front of royalty around the world and just like he did in 1980, he’ll change the NWO at Souled Out. This was actually a pretty decent promo and I remembered it from when I watched this live.
We recap Ray Traylor being thrown out of the NWO and beaten down by Hogan.
Ray Traylor vs. Scott Hall
Traylor shoves him down to start but Hall comes back with the driving shoulder blocks. He slaps Ray in the back of the head and gets sent into the corner and pounding away for his efforts. A corner splash crushes Hall and it’s off to a bearhug to waste some time. The referee takes a shot to the eye so we head to the floor for a bit with Hall hitting Traylor in the face with his NWO tag title belt. That’s only good for two and the middle rope bulldog gets the same for Hall. Scott heads to the floor to grab a chair but Larry comes out to stop him. The distraction lets Traylor hit the Boss Man Slam for the upset pin.
Rating: D+. The match was barely anything but it did advance the Larry vs. Hall feud so I can’t complain all that much. I’m not sure how many people wanted to see Zbyszko vs. Hall but at least it was a feud that had the time to build up for a few months. Speaking of having the time, can we get a match to last five minutes tonight?
Cruiserweight Title: Juventud Guerrera vs. Ultimo Dragon
Dragon is defending. Apparently Scott Steiner has been fined $5000 for hitting the referee during the tag match. The announcers didn’t even notice it so it’s likely a bit extreme. Feeling out process to start with both guys hitting some quick strikes until Juvy hits a springboard spinwheel kick for two. Guerrera misses a splash in the corner and gets stomped down as we actually talk about the match for a bit. Actually scratch that as it’s time to talk about Starrcade a bit more.
Dragon misses a handspring elbow in the corner as the fans think this is boring. Juvy loads up a top rope rana but gets crotched to the floor instead. Dragon hits a moonsault to the floor but injures his knee in the process. They head back in and Dragon hits a release German suplex for two but the top rope rana is countered again. Juvy knocks him to the mat but dives into a dropkick fro Dragon, only to come back with a quick DDT. The Juvy Driver sets up the 450 for the pin and a new champion.
Rating: C. Pretty slow paced stuff here as their high spots weren’t connecting all that well. Dragon only held the belt for about eight days here so it’s kind of hard to care about the title changing this fast. It’s not a bad match but again at just under five minutes we didn’t have time to get invested in it at all.
Here’s Bret Hart for a chat. Bret says that he’s called himself the best there is, was and ever will be and he means it and he’s meant it every time. He’s accomplished a lot over his career but now he has to prove himself all over again. Bret isn’t going to stop calling himself the best ever….and here’s Flair with a rebuttal. Ric talks about how he’s heard from a thousand people since last week (what’s with that? It was three days ago, not last week but people have been saying it all show long) that they want to hear Bret say his catchphrase to Flair’s face.
Bret does just that, sending Flair into a rant about how Bret used to sit in the front row with a box of popcorn wanting to be like Ric Flair. Bret has been a five time WWF Champion, but while he was doing that, Flair was wrestling Brody in Singapore for an hour. Not exactly but Flair is on a roll so I can forgive him. Flair yells about how he’s been around the world but Bret says he’ll have to beat the man to prove that he’s the man. Ric says it’s not just beating the man, but it’s staying the man. More good stuff here, questionable history aside.
Lex Luger vs. Scott Norton
Norton jumps him on the floor to start before heading inside for a clothesline. A backbreaker puts Luger down but a splash misses in the corner. Luger vs. Savage is announced for the PPV and here’s Buff for a distraction. Norton hits the shoulder breaker for two but Luger comes back with the forearm. The Rack ends Norton quick in a rare loss for him.
Bagwell gets Racked too as Savage comes in, only to be chased off by Luger as well.
We get the video from Starrcade of the “fast count” and it’s just not fast no matter how they look at it.
We get the long awaited footage from Nitro, which shows the referee going down and being replaced by Nick Patrick (who was suspended earlier on Nitro), who counts three on Sting as Hogan rolls him up with a handful of tights. Hogan and Sting keep fighting because that’s just what they do, so Sting makes Hogan give up in the Scorpion, which counts now because the original referee never called for the bell, which is the exact same thing that happened at Starrcade but this is almost over so I’m not going to think about it that hard. JJ comes out and gets decked by Bischoff, causing a huge brawl between WCW and the NWO.
Back live again with JJ in the ring for his decision. Before the decision is announced we need Hogan in the ring. Naturally he brings out about five guys (to no music for some reason) for the big meeting. JJ also asks Sting to come to the ring and bring the belt. The official decision is that the title is vacant until they can make an official decision. Sting says JJ has no guts and that Hogan is a dead man, which is the first thing he’s said in a year (ignoring what he said at Starrcade of course). Heenan swears this is a victory for the NWO because that’s what you do when anything happens in WCW.
US Title: Diamond Dallas Page vs. Kevin Nash
Hogan comes out with Nash (despite both guys being in the ring for the previous segment) as Tony swears that we’ll stay with the show no matter what, a mere ten minutes after we saw footage from a match that ended after Nitro went off the air. Page cranks on the arm to start but Nash elbows him down. The champ gets two off a swinging neckbreaker but Nash goes to Page’s eternally injured ribs to take over.
A clothesline in the corner has Page down again and the side slam gets two. Nash pounds on him in the corner and sends Page outside for more very slow pounding. Page is sent into the steps as Hogan tells him to give up. Back in and Nash hits Snake Eyes and an elbow drop for two. Page fights out of another Snake Eyes attempt and loads up the Diamond Cutter but Hogan hits him in the ribs for the DQ.
Rating: D+. We were clearly just killing time until the DQ here which is the case in almost all WCW main events anymore. Hogan being out there was kind of surprising as it could have been any WCW goon for the same ending. Also any bets on there being no mention of a fine to Hogan for doing the same thing Luger did earlier?
Post match Giant comes out to break up a Jackknife and brawls with Nash to end the show.
Overall Rating: D+. Take everything that was good about Nitro from this week and throw it out the window. Let’s see: short and mostly meaningless matches, the title situation is a mess (and will get messier) and the NWO’s problems aren’t even mentioned. In other words, the focus is all back on the NWO being some kind of a threat and WCW needing to pull together, which is exactly what it’s been since like March. This show wasn’t terrible, but man was it frustrating.
On This Day: January 11, 1993 – Monday Night Raw: Raw Debuts
Monday Night Raw
Date: January 11, 1993
Location: Manhattan Center, Manhattan, New York
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Rob Bartlett, Randy Savage
Well since it’s the anniversary of this, why not do it? Raw more or less ended SNME which I’ll do that last original episode soon enough, as in about an hour from now. This is the show that completely revolutionized wrestling as it was the first show to be aired weekly on prime time cable. The production values were WAY up also as the lighting and the effects were stuff that was unheard of. We’re gearing up for the 93 Rumble which kind of sucked but whatever. Let’s get to it.
Sean Mooney who I didn’t think had a job at this point welcomes us to the show and keeps Heenan from coming in. This would become a running joke on the first few shows until Monsoon threw him out of the company. The arena looks small but cool. Rob Bartlett was a comedian from the Don Imus show and he is easily the worst announcer of all time but to be fair, I’ve read some comments from him since and he completely admits that he was awful, so at least he’s not delusional.
Koko B. Ware vs. Yokozuna
Koko comes out to what would become Owen’s music which makes sense as they were partners around this time. I wonder what’s going to happen here. They swear on the air which might be a first. The tag line was uncooked, uncut and uncensored. I never got the uncooked part. How is that appealing? Bartlett just makes fat jokes about Yoko which makes sense. Vince is about as excited as humanly possible to be here. Bartlett makes jokes implying that Koko is Gary Coleman which is kind of funny but just out of place here. After Koko gets in no offense for about 4 minutes, the Banzai Drop ends this.
Rating: N/A. It was a glorified squash which is fine. I’m not sure how good this was for the first match in history but that’s fine I guess. This was just to push Yoko so that certainly accomplished its job. A lot of the earlier shows were almost all squashes so get used to it.
Ad for the Rumble.
We get a prerecorded interview from Heenan who talks about Perfect being scared of Narcissus, who was more commonly known as Luger. Heenan is WAY too excited about Luger.
Steiner Brothers vs. Executioners
The Executioners are masked jobbers as if it matters. That goofy clown as Vince calls him is at ringside and gets too much attention. Apparently his name is Doink. As for the match, are you really expecting anything other than total destruction? Apparently Mitch Ferhat, a former Buffalo Bill, is coming to the WWF. He never got there. The Steiner Bulldog ends it.
Rating: N/A. It was more or less the same thing as we got a match earlier, but with two guys instead of one. This is fine as it establishes two dominant forces for new fans which is a good idea.
A woman says that she’s Bartlett’s aunt. Naturally it’s Heenan in drag. This simply does not get old.
Razor Ramon comes out for a “special” interview. He’s fighting Bret for the title at the Rumble in case you didn’t know. It’s exactly what you would expect it to be as it’s just Ramon talking about Bret and how he’ll win the title and we see a clip of him beating up Owen on Superstars, which is why Owen isn’t here tonight.
Ad for Headlock on Hunger, which was a charity thing they were doing at the time to feed hungry people in Somalia.
Tatanka likes the Headlock on Hunger.
Intercontinental Title: Max Moon vs. Shawn Michaels
Max Moon may or may not have been Konnan. Shawn is just getting used to being a midcard deal so don’t expect much here. I don’t think it’s him here as it might be Paul Diamond, who was one of the Orient Express. We get more and more New York jokes from Bartlett that only a handful of people would get. He was great on a morning talk show but WAY off on a wrestling show.
They get the three un line here twice in one match as they try so hard to get that over as a tagline before they realized it sucked. Bartlett, in something that blows my mind, does an impression of Mike Tyson calling into the show from prison. This goes on over two minutes. Make that three. THEY’RE STILL DOING IT.
Seriously they did this for half of the match. Is this supposed to be funny or something? Am I supposed to be amused? After what felt like forever, Shawn hits the kick and that stupid suplex that he was using as his finisher at the time for the pin.
Rating: C+. It was an average match, but it had the DUMBEST commentary in recorded history. The match gets bonus points for being ok with those voices going though so there we are.
Ad for WWF Mania, a Saturday morning show.
Gene does the control center for the Rumble, which more or less is him talking about the major matches and we get promos from some of the guys in said matches, in this case Shawn and Marty. This is short but it was very effective at summarizing the entire show into a 3 minute video. Well done. We run down some people in the Rumble and get comments from Perfect. Ok now this needs to end as it’s about five minutes now. This was the first winner gets a title shot and it’s at 4pm. That’s just odd.
We have an Amish man trying to get inside. Guess who it is. He asks if anyone knows how to get onto the roof. I feel like I’m watching a Trix Cereal commercial. Also, WHERE DOES HE GET THESE COSTUMES???
Kamala exists and that’s about it.
Damien Demento vs. Undertaker
Who else would you get to main event the first show? Bartlett makes fun of Taker and I’m already tired of him. Demento is the guy that freaked out on youtube recently and freaked out about modern wrestling. He’s annoying and this is his career highlight. We go over the matches for next week and that’s about all that happens in this match. The Tombstone ends this quickly.
Rating: N/A. It’s like 3 minutes long and it’s more or less a squash. That’s not that interesting.
Doink sprays Crush with water to end the show.
Overall Rating: D+. This started off ok but it felt like there was no flow to it at all. It just wasn’t that good of a show as far as establishing people like it was supposed to do. This show definitely assumed that most people were long time fans of the show and that’s not a good idea to do on a brand new main show.
Still though, this is one of those shows everyone should see at least once as it truly did completely revolutionize wrestling. Definitely take a look at it if you never have before or just to compare it to modern wrestling and see how much things have changed.
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews
Ring of Honor – September 24, 2011 – ECW On SyFy’s Debut Might Be Off The Hook Now
Ring of Honor
Date: September 24, 2011
Location: Frontier Fieldhouse, Chicago Ridge, Illinois
Commentators: Kevin Kelly, Nigel McGuinness
This is the debut episode under the new owners of Sinclair Broadcasting and since I get the channel that it airs on, I’ll be reviewing it weekly now. I won’t be doing it live but it’ll be up by the end of Saturday. This should be interesting as I’ve heard nothing but how great ROH is and now I can watch it. I’m not sure how great it’ll be but maybe it’s worth seeing. Anyway, I don’t watch a ton of ROH but I know of it and follow it to a certain degree. Let’s get to it.
Please keep in mind I haven’t watched an ROH show in about a year so if I don’t get a reference or miss something big, please bear with me.
The arena looks kind of small and it’s dark like the old WCW arenas were but with better production values obviously.
Kevin Kelly welcomes us to the show and announces the main event of the show as being for the tag titles with Wrestling’s Greatest Tag Team (Haas/Benjamin) defending against the Kings of Wrestling (both in WWE now). He also brings out the returning Nigel McGuinness (Desmond Wolfe) as the analyst. Nigel talks about how he’s here for the boys in the back and how he wanted to be a part of this.
Adam Cole and Kyle O’Riley (Futureshock) says they’re going to take over the tag division.
The Bravados (didn’t catch their first names) say they’re going to destroy Futureshock and parents shouldn’t let their kids watch. These teams had a match before and one of the Bravados was injured so there’s a story to this.
Futureshock vs. The Bravados
Both teams appear to be faces and the Bravados are Cherokees. Their names are Harlem and Lance and Kevin Kelly says their win/loss record isn’t great. They’re shaking hands to follow the Code of Honor (not defined here) and it’s Adam vs. Harlem to start. Ok so Adam has the long hair. Got it. Futureshock uses some speed moves to take out Harlem and it breaks down quickly as Lance doesn’t have much more success. They hook a weird move where the Bravados’ legs are intertwined and both Futureshock guys hook armbars.
The Bravados make a blind tag (Kelly: He didn’t see that one.) and take over on Cole. I have no idea which Bravado is which but one gets a Justin Bieber chant. Yeah he does look a bit like him and the pin spotted trunks and boots don’t help. Ok Harlem looks like Bieber and Lance has long hair. Got it also. There’s a Tweet of the Week which makes fun of Russo’s booking by saying “You should watch ROH because it’s not 1997.”
The Bravados hit a double team superkick/German suplex combo called Gentlemen’s Choice for two. Adam tries to fight out of the corner and eventually rolls through to O’Riley. He’s part of Team Richards, meaning he trains with Davey Richards, meaning I’m probably not going to like him at all. He uses a double dragon screw leg whip (he whips one Bravado and that Bravado whips his partner because letting go is too much of a stretch I guess) and a double dropkick takes the Bravados down for two.
Futureshock does a bunch of combo suplexes and Adam hits a suicide dive to take both Bravados out. A missile dropkick off the apron puts a Bravado down and top rope cross body gets two for both guys. They take out Harlem with something that has a name but I couldn’t understand Kelly. It’s Total Elimination but with a clothesline rather than a spin kick and it gets the pin at 7:20.
Rating: B-. I think I can sum up this entire series in the following statement: if you like the ROH style, you’ll like this and if you don’t, you’re not going to be that impressed. There’s some good stuff here but a lot of the moves are ones where the other team clearly had to work with them for it to work and that drives me crazy. It was entertaining but I wouldn’t call it great. That can be good but it’s not going to get to a higher level than that with this style, at least not with me.
We get a report from Best in the World, a show back in I think June. Uh yeah….shouldn’t we be seeing new stuff instead of clips from old shows? It focuses on a four team elimination match won by Haas/Benjamin and followed by a post match beatdown by the Briscos. Now we talk about the world title match where Davey Richards finally won the title by beating Eddie Edwards. Never been a fan of Richards and I don’t think I’ll start now. This eats up like 6 minutes, or 10% of the show.
Here’s a segment called Inside Ring of Honor which explains the Code of Honor. Jim Cornette says that it’s a self imposed code. The idea is you shake hands pre and post match as a show of respect etc. It’s not mandatory but the guys that don’t use it aren’t that popular. In other words, take away the aspect of hatred for the sake of a Code and respect. That’s the same issue that TNA has far too often and it gets old.
Jay Lethal vs. El Generico for the TV Title next week. Lethal says he tried to be someone else for years (Savage) but here it’s about competition and not politics. He’s taking the TV Title so he can get the respect of the fans.
Since it’s been long enough since we’ve had an actual match, here’s a second look at the elimination tag match. Is there a point to this? I mean, it’s like an ad for the website/DVD instead of talking about the show itself. I don’t get this. WE SAW THIS TEN MINUTES AGO. This is eating up like 5 more minutes. They do know they only have an hour a week right???
Nigel interviews a fan who says the champs will retain.
Tag Titles: Kings of Wrestling vs. Wrestling’s Greatest Tag Team
Each time someone comes to the ring they get streamers thrown at them. It’s annoying but I guess it’s something to get used to. The Kings are Chris Hero and Claudio Castagnoli. The champs (Haas/Benjamin) took the belts from them after the Kings held them forever. This is the first match in 24 minutes, meaning 40% of this show had zero wrestling on it due to highlight packages. That would be like 48 minutes without wrestling on Raw. Oh wait WE HAVE A COMMERCIAL BEFORE THE BELL.
There’s the bell and it’s been 27 minutes since the last match ended, or 54 minutes in Raw time. Haas vs. Hero to start us off. How did a guy like Haas get Jackie Gayda? Off to Nigel quickly so maybe he started and I wasn’t paying enough attention. Haas counters a few hip tosses and takes Claudio down with arm drags. This is match #4 in their series and the champs are 2-1 so far.
Blind tag brings in Benjamin and he hits a top rope clothesline to take over. Off to hero who gets caught in a small package for two. Hero sells a lot and things start to break down. Benjamin can’t hit the dragon whip and the Kings take over with nefarious means. Benjamin is thrown outside and Hero hits a baseball slide to take him out again. We take a break and come back with Claudio holding a headlock and hitting a powerslam for two.
Benjamin tries the tag and hits Dragon Whip this time but Hero pulls Haas off the apron. Charlie comes in and lets Hero hit an elbow to the back of the head for two. Off to Hero (Claudio got the two) and Hero hits a senton backsplash for two. Benjamin counters a double suplex into a double neckbreaker and there’s a leaping hot tag. Roaring Elbow by Hero is countered into a German and Claudio takes a T-Bone for two.
A rana and a big boot gets the same. Haas gets taken down and another elbow called the KTFO (you figure it out) gets two for Hero. Was there a tag there? The third spinning forearm/elbow (WE GET IT ALREADY) sets up a giant swing by Claudio as we go back to the 70s. The Kings set for their finisher (KRS 1) but it’s broken up by Benjamin. A hot shot sets up the thing where Shelton jumps over Charlie to land on the other dude’s back and a Hart Attack ends this at 16:48.
Rating: B-. Not bad here but dude, this was the best they could do? This is supposed to be the big and epic tag team division that is the best in the world? It’s not bad but it’s certainly not a classic or anything at all. I’ve definitely seen better stuff on Raw or Smackdown this year. I saw a match live that was better than this and I can’t even remember who were partnering with Orton and Christian.
They’re off the air at 2:58. We didn’t even get the whole hour. WOW.
Overall Rating: D+. And that’s a stretch. This was one of the least inspiring debuts I’ve seen in a very long time. On a 58 minute show (whatsupwitdat?) we had 22 minutes of wrestling and 36 minutes of talking/highlight packages. Now I could understand that if you’re introducing characters etc, but that isn’t what they did. We got two packages OF THE EXACT SAME THING, a quick promo for a TV Title match next week and a video on Richards who won’t be here for two weeks.
If this is the debut, you need to bring out the champ for it, not the tag champs. Wrestling fans see the world champion as the top guy in any company. I don’t care if it’s different in ROH, it’s not different for fans. This was their coming out party and it didn’t work for the most part. Not a fan so far, but this was their first show so we’ll see how it goes next time. Bad show.
Results
Futureshock b. The Bravados – Ride the Lightning to Harlem
Wrestling’s Greatest Tag Team b. The Kings of Wrestling – Wrestling’s Greatest Finisher to Hero