Impact Wrestling
Date: April 5, 2016
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Jeremy Borash, Josh Matthews

It’s a night of revenge tonight in what might be (and hopefully is) the last match in the Jeff Hardy vs. Eric Young feud. In this case they’re inside a cage in a match that doesn’t mean much, especially since the King of the Mountain Title isn’t on the line. To be fair the thing is hardly ever defended so this isn’t a big surprise. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the end of last week’s show with Drew Galloway successfully defending the title against Jeff, setting up Matt Hardy challenging for the title tonight, along with Jeff vs. Eric.

Jeff Hardy vs. Eric Young

Non-title and inside six sides of steel. Before the match, Young gets his standard promo time and promises to piledrive Hardy to death. Young has Bram with him so Hardy brings out a table. They start brawling on the floor without a bell and Bram helps Eric send him into the cage wall. A piledriver on the exposed concrete doesn’t work as TNA’s insurance policy doesn’t cover death.

Young tells Bram to get a table as the handicap beating continues. They FINALLY get inside for the opening bell with a table and a bunch of chairs thrown inside for fun. A jawbreaker staggers Young and the whole double beatdown is forgotten. We take a break less than a minute after the bell and come back with Young sending Hardy head first into the cage. Eric wedges a chair into the corner but of course Hardy reverses him into it instead.

They tease putting each other through the table until Jeff gets kicked to the mat. The legdrop between the legs has Young down for two but Jeff takes too much time loading up some chairs in the middle of the ring, allowing Eric to piledrive him through them for two. You know, because of course a piledriver onto open chairs only gets two. Young sets up a table instead, only to have Jeff hit a quick Twist of Fate. That’s not enough either of course as he puts Eric on the table for a heavily edited Swanton off the top of the cage for the pin at 13:19.

Rating: C+. The match was fun but nothing we haven’t seen before. On top of that it’s also a waste of the King of the Mountain Title, which Hardy never mentioned or showed any suggestion of wanting whatsoever. I know the belt already means nothing but it’s not like Jeff has to pretty much acknowledge it throughout the feud. Good match though.

Dixie Carter talks to Maria and Gail over how they can’t just make a #1 contender. The result is a three way for the title tonight because what else were they going to do. Dixie doesn’t want to hear Maria’s ideas either.

Jeff is icing his head and wants the Creatures to stay with him.

Here are Matt Hardy (with the Brand) and Drew Galloway for their final speeches before the title match. Granted they’re also the first speeches but you have to stretch sometimes in TNA. Drew says Matt is going to talk all night long so it’s time for him to shut up. Matt thinks that Drew has his property because he has an entourage like a champion and is the epitome of success in this business.

Tonight he’s going to take the title that belongs to him. Drew talks about how Matt has lost his passion and is now only in it for the money. Matt doesn’t like Drew bringing up his win over Jeff but promises to get the title back. That’s it but Tyrus says he’s coming for the winner. Are we really waiting for Tyrus vs. Galloway or Hardy now? Apparently it’s set up like a Money in the Bank as he implies he might cash it in tonight.

Pope talks about being ready for a fight tonight because it might be the last thing he knows how to do. It’s a lot easier to jump on than it is to jump off daddy.

Post break Ethan Carter III comes up to laugh at Tyrus’ threat. Tyrus: “I hate you.” Ethan: “I hate you more.”

Lashley vs. D’Angelo Dinero

This is a street fight after Pope saved Josh Matthews from a beatdown a few weeks ago. Pope has been active at least down in OVW so he’s certainly not coming out of mothballs. Lashley jumps him from behind to start and the beating is quickly on with Pope in early trouble. The opening bell is late again and it’s all Lashley early.

As you might expect, the announcers ignore the match to talk about Tyrus cashing in, which apparently has to be announced in advance. That’s a bit better at least. Lashley gets in a delayed vertical suplex and loads up a stomp onto the steps, only to get blasted with a trashcan. Some kendo stick shots to the back have Lashley down with Josh being far too happy over the beatdown. Not that it matters as Lashley comes right back with a spear for the pin at 6:48.

Rating: C-. This had a lot of potential on paper but the match really wasn’t much to see. I get the idea of having it be a street fight for the sake of giving Pope a fighting chance but this was just a step above a squash. Pope would be a good addition to the roster as he’s not that old and can cut an energetic promo. I mean, it’s not like they have anyone else to put out there.

Lashley spears him down two more times before Ethan Carter III comes out for a slow save. As Lashley leaves, Mike Bennett sneaks in and jumps Carter from behind.

Post break, Carter offers to fight Bennett right now. Instead he gets Maria who talks about the people. Carter: “OH PUT A SOCK IN IT TOOTS!” Bennett comes out and accuses EC3 as someone who is looking for an excuse, just like everyone else around here. Carter is willing to get rid of Bennett at any time but Mike yells at him for losing the title. It means Carter has nothing left but he’s still making excuse after excuse. Bennett goes on a great rant about how he’s going to be World Champion after beating Carter, leaving everyone to say YES WE DO.

Carter is ready right now but Mike says we’ll do it next week. That’s not enough for Ethan as he goes after Mike and runs Maria over in the process. They go into the parking lot with Bennett getting hit in the back with a chair until he steals a tire iron from a car to knock Carter away, allowing him to steal the car and escape. This was REALLY good stuff and one of the best buildups to a match that I’ve seen TNA do in a long time.

Rockstar Spud has a plan for Tyrus but he crumples it up. Man that’s just rude. Imagine the time and effort he put into that.

Knockouts Title: Jade vs. Madison Rayne vs. Gail Kim

Gail is defending. Jade gets beaten back and forth to start but Gail is sent to the floor, leaving Rayne to get a rollup for two. The champ gets suplexed and it’s the challengers slugging it out until Gail pops back up for a neckbreaker to Madison and a DDT to Jade at the same time. Jade dives through the ropes to take Madison down as the announcers talk about Gail potentially injuring her leg. Well that and the Schitt’s Creek show with a horrible transition. As the challengers fight on the floor, Maria sneaks in with a belt shot to Gail, setting up an STO from Jade for the pin and the title at 3:41.

Rating: D-. The ending is the right choice (though you know Gail is going to get the title back in a few months at most because we must praise Gail Kim at every given chance) but the match was a mess with almost no time and all three looking in different libraries instead of on the same page. Nothing to see here but at least we have a fresh champion.

Galloway is ready to defend his title.

Shane Helms wants to hear Eddie Edwards’ answer but it should be obvious from here.

We look back at Al Snow beating up Grado last week.

Snow says Billy Corgan should understand his actions. Apparently Snow is upset that they’re letting anyone in, including people like Grado. Snow is suspended for a week without pay and is expected to publicly apologize.

Here are Helms and Trevor Lee for Edwards’ answer about joining up for a tag team. Eddie comes out and says everything takes time but Helms doesn’t like that word. He’s teamed with people a lot less talented than Eddie and found success so imagine what they could do together. Eddie doesn’t buy it though and thinks Shane just wants the automatic title shot he has coming. That belongs to Davey Richards though, meaning he wants no part of the Helms Dynasty when he’s already part of the Wolves Nation.

Violence is about to erupt when Beer Money comes out for the save. Insults are issued and Beer Money confirms that they are in fact, Beer Money. Storm says line up the teams because they’ll knock them down. Cue Decay with Rosemary saying when you wish on a dying star, you will decay, decay, decay. Abyss wants the titles so Storm says they’re ready to fight right now. The brawl is quickly on but security breaks it up even faster.

Matt talks about being ready to take his title back tonight. As he talks about how it’s time for him to take, Tyrus is slowly seen walking up the hallway behind him for a really cool visual.

Beer Money wants Decay next week.

TNA World Title: Drew Galloway vs. Matt Hardy

Drew is defending. Tyrus stands in the ring for the intros before taking off his gear and….going to the floor. Matt is smart enough to use the distraction to jump Drew from behind for an early advantage. A bulldog and legdrop have Drew in trouble and we take a break. Back with Matt hitting a Side Effect on the apron and going back inside, allowing Spud (called a ring rat by Josh) to get in a few cheap shots. A pair of neckbreakers gets two for Matt but Drew comes back with a good looking belly to belly.

Matt takes him up top for a quick gutwrench superplex but has to stop and take off his boot due to an ankle injury. Apparently it’s just a ruse though (how villainous) as Spud tries to come in for a cheap shot, only to get suplexed as well. Futureshock connects but Tyrus pulls the referee out at two. Cue Jeff to beat up Tyrus as Matt Twists Drew for another near fall. Drew is done with this though and grabs the Iron Maiden for the tap out at 12:10.

Rating: C-. Too many Hardys around of course but it’s good to have Matt and Jeff out of the way so we can get on to some more interesting challengers. You know, like Tyrus apparently. They really need to give him his title shot already so we don’t have to sit around waiting on him to cash in like he’s someone interesting.

Overall Rating: C+. I had a good time with this show as they seem to actually be setting up some stuff for the future. Unfortunately I don’t have much hope for this company to pull stuff off but at least they’re showing some potential here. At long as they stop focusing on the Hardys as the stars of the promotion, things could get better over the next few weeks.

Results

Jeff Hardy b. Eric Young – Swanton Bomb through a table

Lashley b. D’Angelo Dinero – Spear

Jade b. Madison Rayne and Gail Kim – STO to Kim

Drew Galloway b. Matt Hardy – Iron Maiden

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Impact Wrestling
Date: March 15, 2016
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D’Angelo Dinero

This is a special live(ish) episode with some major matches taking place. We have Jeff Hardy returning (as he does every single year after the company gets back from the UK) to go after Eric Young but not for the King of the Mountain Title, as well as Matt Hardy defending his World Title against Ethan Carter III (again). Let’s get to it.

Eric Young vs. Jeff Hardy

Non-title but before the match, Young finds Dixie Carter in the back and yells about how he’s going to destroy the golden boy tonight. The fight starts fast with Jeff trying an early Twist of Fate but Eric bails to the floor. Dixie cuts off the match and says the winner of this is going on to the main event for the World Title. The fans get behind Jeff as Eric pounds away and shoves Jeff off the top for a big crash.

Back in and Eric stomps Hardy in the corner before crotching him again to break up a Whisper in the Wind attempt. A choke out of the corner and a neckbreaker give Eric a near fall but he dives into a raised boot to give Jeff a breather. Another Twist of Fate is broken up as Eric gets crotched, only to shove Eric down and hit the Swanton for the pin at 10:02.

Rating: C-. Just a basic match here but that announcement sealed the ending. You knew they were going to try to get Jeff into the title hunt as soon as possible as they really don’t have anyone else to thrown out there. The match was nothing interesting either but that’s to be expected with these two.

Post match here are Matt Hardy and company with something to say. After the break, Matt says he would have been there to help Jeff but he had to take care of his family. Reby thinks that Jeff is Maxell’s second favorite wrestler and lets him hold the baby. Matt offers his brother a long build towards a Bound For Glory match but Jeff doesn’t buy it. He’ll take that match tonight and counters a Twist of Fate attempt into one on the champ to stand tall.

Earlier today, Eddie Edwards was attacked by the Decay.

Mike Bennett and Maria Kanellis promise to destroy Gail Kim and Drew Galloway.

Eddie Edwards says he’s ready to fight Beer Money on his own but they’re willing to join forces with him to fight Decay tonight.

Mike Bennett/Maria Kanellis vs. Gail Kim/Drew Galloway

The women start but Maria bails to the corner for a tag before anything can happen. Drew comes in and kicks Mike in the face before bringing Gail back in for a few shots of his own. Back to Drew as the announcers talk about the sitcoms airing on POP. Drew tells Bennett to bring it so Maria slaps him in the face.

That just makes Drew chop Mike even faster but he gets pulled off the top for a crash. Maria comes in and tries to keep Drew away from Gail, which goes about as well as you would expect. The tag brings in Gail for Eat Defeat to Bennett followed by a Claymore but Maria grabs a rollup on Gail with a handful of trunks for the pin at 5:07.

Rating: D+. This was a way to get Maria in the ring and at least Gail lost for a change. Of course that doesn’t mean anything because she’s always going to wind up getting the title back for a long reign because TNA thinks she’s the most amazing thing on the planet. The fact that everything Maria says is accurate doesn’t help things either. This division really needs a breath of air and Gail near the top isn’t going to do that any good.

We look back at Lashley turning heel to end last week’s show.

Here’s Lashley in the ring for an interview about his actions last week. He waited a long time to fight Angle because he’s the best and strongest around this company, which he proved last week. So why does he get overlooked for the Drew Galloways and the Jeff Hardys? Politics maybe? Not that it matters as Lashley came after Kurt to prove he belonged here. Lashley has no friends and wants no friends because he needs no friends. However, Josh Matthews is in his ring right now, so Lashley throws him into the corner. Dang I thought they wanted him to be a heel. Pope comes in for the save and gets beaten down as well, which the fans actually don’t like.

That’s their best idea to make him a heel? Have him beat up the most annoying announcer this side of Cole as a Miz fan? As usual, anytime Lashley talks, things go badly for him as there’s no charisma or any kind of an intimidating voice. The idea here is good but the execution was a disaster of course.

The Decay welcomes us to their black hole and promises a third person to fight against Beer Money and Edwards.

Jeremy Borash has replaced Pope on commentary.

Ethan Carter III congratulates Jeff Hardy for getting into the World Title match but Jeff says he’s winning the title for the Creatures.

Decay vs. Eddie Edwards/Beer Money

The partner is Rosemary, which should make for some interesting action. Steve jumps Storm from behind to start but it’s quickly off to Roode for two off a release gordbuster. Abyss comes in to start cleaning house by slamming Roode down, allowing him to chokeslam Steve onto Roode’s body for two. Rosemary gets the tag and hammers away for a bit before Roode avoids a Cannonball from Steve. The hot tag brings in Storm for his chance to clean house but Steve pulls Rosemary away from the double suplex. Instead Rosemary mists Edwards, allowing Steve to get the pin at 7:17.

Rating: D+. This did nothing for me as it was just two teams doing moves to each other for a few minutes until the ending. Decay is an idea but it’s something we’ve seen enough times before that it’s a bit hard to get behind. They’re definitely entertaining and freaky enough to get noticed but losing that title shot a few weeks back crippled their push.

Billy Corgan (You know him. I mean, you all read the internet so you know he has power here. It’s not like we ever need to TELL YOU THAT or anything.) tells Grado that TNA has come to a decision and will let him know the fate of the Feast or Fired case in the ring.

Matt and Reby accuse Dixie of adding Jeff to the match because she’s jealous. This earns them a new stipulation for the title match: no countout and no DQ. Aren’t all triple threats like that already?

We recap the King of the Mountain Title briefcase issue with TNA finally showing the footage of Eli Drake switching the briefcases. This was released on TNA’s Youtube page so of course TNA assumed we had all seen it. Corgan comes out and says it’s Drake’s case but Grado gets a new contract. Oh but it’s going to be above the ring in a ladder match after the break. BUILD THIS STUFF UP!

Eli Drake vs. Grado

The announcers try to figure out what’s on the line here as Drake hits Grado in the back with the ladder. A hard whip sends Eli into the ladder and Grado starts his comeback, only to have Jesse Godderz come out for the save. Cue Mahabali Shera for a save but the heels hit him in the back with the briefcase. Grado goes up the ladder but dives onto the pile for an unnecessary chance. Another attempt at the case is stopped by Drake so Grado takes him down with a huge electric chair, which is enough for Grado to pull down the contract at 7:07.

Rating: C. Ok and now what? Grado is back on the roster after never really being off and they blew off the thing in a ladder match on five minutes notice. This is the kind of stuff that gets on my nerves about TNA: they have all these matches and stories and they blow them off on the live shows to pop ratings but then they go to eternal rematches afterwards because they have nothing left to air. That’s way too hasty and it gets them in trouble a lot of the time.

Eric Young tells Bram that everyone is out to get him so they have to work together.

TNA World Title: Matt Hardy vs. Jeff Hardy vs. Ethan Carter III

Matt is defending and we don’t even get big match intros. The challengers beat Matt down to start but it’s Ethan grabbing a rollup for two on Jeff. Carter drops both Hardys and sends them both to the floor as we take a break. Back with Ethan down on the floor after a Side Effect and but Jeff blocks a Twist of Fate. The Swanton is loaded up but here are Bram and Eric Young to pull Jeff down and piledrive him on the concrete. Jeff is taken out as Carter gets back in and hits his Stinger Splash, drawing out Spud and Tyrus for another save.

They’re quickly dispatched though, allowing Matt to kick Ethan low. The Twist of Fate is countered into the 1%er but Mike Bennett comes in (ENOUGH ALREADY!) to chair Carter in the back. That’s only good for two and the Twist of Fate gets the same. Bennett throws Carter to the floor and fights into the crowd with Bennett getting in another chair shot. Matt is ready to leave and shouts at the fans that he’s leaving as champion…..but here’s Galloway to cash in his briefcase as the triple threat is a no contest at 18:30.

Rating: D+. The run-ins were driving me insane here as they took away anything this could have gotten going. The major bright spot here though is that Carter didn’t get pinned. That should be a major moment and wasting it in a triple threat would have been a big waste. I’m really not a big fan of having people added to matches to make them a triple threat but TNA is in love with the idea and that’s what we were stuck with here.

TNA World Title: Drew Galloway vs. Matt Hardy

The Claymore and Future Shock give Drew the title at 18 seconds.

Drew celebrates with the title to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This is TNA’s major TV problem showing its head again: there’s WAY too much being burned off in a single show and not enough over the coming weeks. You could have had Grado vs. Drake announced for next week, Jeff vs. Young go on last (assuming Jeff is healthy enough to compete) and the World Title match at a later date. Instead they threw all that together and didn’t even get a good show out of it. It’s not bad but WAY too much in a single night, which isn’t a good thing.

Results

Jeff Hardy b. Eric Young – Swanton Bomb

Maria Kanellis/Mike Bennett b. Drew Galloway/Gail Kim – Rollup with a handful of trunks

Decay b. Eddie Edwards/Beer Money – Steve pinned Edwards after mist from Rosemary

Grado b. Eli Drake – Grado pulled down the contract

Matt Hardy vs. Ethan Carter III vs. Jeff Hardy went to a no contest

Drew Galloway b. Matt Hardy – Future Shock

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Impact Wrestling
Date: February 16, 2016
Location: MEN Arena, Manchester, England
Attendance: 3,000
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D’Angelo Dinero

We’re still in England and Lockdown is in a week (not that TNA has bothered to tell us that just yet of course), likely with the returning Ethan Carter III challenging Matt Hardy in one of the new champ’s first title defenses. Other than that we may have more issues between Matt and Dixie Carter over Jeff Hardy’s future. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the Tag Team Title situation with Decay stealing the Wolves’ belts and daring the champs to come get them in a Monster’s Ball this week.

Another recap shows us the ending of last week’s show with Ethan Carter III returning to chase off Matt Hardy.

Ethan comes up to Dixie in the back and says it’s now his mission to take the title back from Hardy. Dixie tells him that the rematch will be next week in Lockdown inside the steel cage. That’s fine with Ethan, but tonight he has something personal to take care of.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Ethan in the arena with something to say. He walked into this company two and a half years ago with a chip on his shoulder and he’s beaten everyone in front of him save for one name. That one man is all that matter to him right now and that is Matt Hardy. The one word that matters right now is rematch and Matt is going to be locked inside a cage with all of Ethan’s rage and vengeance.

Right now though, Ethan’s fists need to start punching someone and he can’t think of anyone better than Tyrus. Maybe Tyrus is breast feeding Maxel Hardy but get out here right now and fight. Tyrus comes out to say Ethan doesn’t want this. However, Tyrus thinks Ethan is afraid to be alone and he got to a new level with Tyrus. They were close enough for Tyrus to call him boss, but now Tyrus knows everything about him. Ethan asks if Tyrus is done and now the brawl is on.

Tyrus takes over and punches Carter up the aisle, only to be sent into the barricade a few times. This brings out Matt for the double beatdown and it’s time for a chair. Ethan fights both of them off though and cleans house with a chair. Matt issues the challenge for the tag match later tonight.

Here are Eric Young and Bram with something to say. Young asks if there’s anyone in the crowd tough enough to take his King of the Mountain Title from him. One person who certainly won’t be doing it is Jeff Hardy, but this brings out Beer Money. OF COURSE IT BRINGS OUT BEER MONEY because we haven’t had this story go on long enough yet. Storm accepts the challenge and we’re ready to go.

King of the Mountain Title: Eric Young vs. James Storm

Young is defending and gets taken down in a hurry with Storm sending him into the corner. Storm gets sent to the floor though, allowing Eric to take over back inside. An elbow to the face gets two and a neckbreaker gets the same. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Storm fights up with some clotheslines. Roode intercepts Bram and all four guys brawl to the floor for the double countout at 4:07.

Rating: D. Sweet goodness I can’t stand Eric Young. I don’t remember being more miserable when someone comes on my TV. I get that he’s been around for a long time but this feud with Bobby Roode and now Beer Money I guess has been going on for years now. There’s no reason left for them to fight other than “well they’ve been fighting for a while now.” Find something else for them to do or stop putting them on TV because it’s been old for a long time.

All four fight into the crowd.

Drew Galloway offers to be Ethan’s partner. They have common goals but Ethan wants to stand alone tonight.

Back from a break and THEY’RE STILL FIGHTING. Just put them in the cage match like you know you’re going to next week so we can hopefully end this feud already. We cut away as the fighting continues.

Here are Mike Bennett and Maria to discuss the people that have come across Mike so far. Kurt Angle hit him from behind and then ran away. Drew Galloway is stuck with a ticking time bomb called a briefcase. Tonight though, Mike wants to face one of the UK’s own.

Mike Bennett vs. Mandrews

Mandrews takes him down with an early armdrag and we’re already at the first shooting star, only to have Mike raise his knees. We hit the early chinlock for a few moments before Mike flapjacks him for two. Mandrews comes back with a spinning DDT and a standing corkscrew moonsault for two of his own. Bennett crotches him on top and hits a hanging Diamond Cutter, followed by the Miracle in Progress for the pin at 3:46.

Rating: D+. I’m not wild on the Miracle gimmick but at least he looked more dominant for a change. Bennett could go somewhere, assuming he can actually outlive Matt Hardy’s World Title reign. Not much to see here but it’s always fun to watch a pest like Mandrews get beaten down for a bit.

Post match Bennett keeps pounding on Mandrews until Drew Galloway makes the save.

Rosemary talks about leaving the Wolves lying in a pool of their own blood with nothing to wear. Abyss promises that she’ll be the most beautiful woman at the ball. The Decay is in a cage when someone comes up to say he remembers Rosemary. He blows a kiss and says he’ll see them soon. Apparently that would be British wrestler Jimmy Havoc.

Post break and Bennett beats down Galloway and Mandrews in the back.

Odarg the Great (notice the spelling) is coming.

Matt Hardy and Tyrus threaten Rockstar Spud to not be Ethan’s partner later.

We look back at Angle vs. Lashley from last year.

Tag Team Titles: Wolves vs. Decay

Monster’s Ball (street fight) with the Wolves defending. They brawl in the aisle to start and the weapons are quickly brought in as we take an early break. Such a stupid WWE move. Back with the Wolves in control and grabbing a ladder. Abyss’ ankle gets caught in the ladder but Rosemary mists Davey to break up the top rope double stomp, allowing Abyss to pelt a chair at Eddie, knocking him down through a table.

Abyss pulls out Janice and before I can type “and he swings it, only to get it caught in the turnbuckle pad because HE ALWAYS GETS IT CAUGHT IN THE TURNBUCKLE PAD”, he swings it, only to get it caught in the turnbuckle pad because HE ALWAYS GETS IT CAUGHT IN THE TURNBUCKLE PAD. That means more violence as Abyss piles up chairs until Eddie gets up for the save, setting up sunset bomb onto the chairs.

Steve and Davey get back in and the champs hit the clown in the back with a chair, setting up a top rope double stomp. Abyss starts cleaning house and brings out the bag of tacks. Pope: “We always think it’s the tacks but you never know!” Yeah Pope we do know, because it’s always the tacks. Eddie kicks Abyss out to the floor, allowing Davey to suicide dive the monster into the barbed wire board. Steve blasts Eddie with a chair off camera and puts his head inside a chair.

Rosemary gets in the ring to break up something like a Conchairto though as she pours the tacks (yeah they were tacks, because they’re always tacks) onto Eddie’s head first. The Conchairto misses though because of course it does, allowing Eddie to use Janice to knock a chair into Steve’s face. Richards kisses Rosemary (there’s some sexual assault for you) but it’s a trick to suck the mist out of her mouth. I’m not sure if that’s brilliant or ridiculous. Whatever they call Chasing the Dragon onto the chairs puts Steve away at 14:33.

Rating: C+. Much like almost everything else on this show, I’ve seen this so many times before. Like I said a few times here, you knew it was going to be tacks because it’s always tacks. You knew Abyss was going into the barbed wire board because he always goes into the barbed wire board. Finally you knew Janice wasn’t hitting anyone because it never does. The match is still entertaining, but they haven’t changed the formula in so long that it’s beyond stale. Oh and thanks for coming Decay. Can we just release Steve now?

Spud offers to be Ethan’s partner but Ethan still wants to do it alone.

Gail Kim/Madison Rayne vs. Jade/Marti Bell

Speaking of things we’ve seen time after time. It’s a brawl to start with Marti scoring off a Samoan Drop to Kim, followed by a running flip neckbreaker for two. Gail gets beaten down a little more until Jade runs into a boot in the corner. The hot tag brings in Madison as everything breaks down. Jade’s dive is broken up by Gail’s forearm, allowing Madison to roll Marti up for the pin at 4:00.

Rating: D. So? The feud is just going to continue because the Dollhouse has the numbers advantage and for some reason they’ll beat everyone down and re-establish dominance that they lose again the next week because they almost never win anything. I’m sure a former Beautiful People member will make the save and set up a six Knockout cage match that only TNA’s hardest of hardcore fans will find interesting because that’s how the Knockouts work.

Post match, the Dollhouse beats down Gail and Madison until Velvet Sky makes the save. Velvet wants Lethal Lockdown next week.

Mahabali Shera is back and has a new friend in Odarg the Great, who says he’s a good guy. It’s clearly Grado as the mask is similar to Vader’s old style.

Eric Young/Bram and Beer Money are still fighting in the back. Pope: “They’ll get tired in a while.” The villains finally start walking away but Beer Money tells the cameraman that they want a cage match next week. So I’m supposed to care about a ten minute match after they just fought for over an hour?

Jesse Godderz/Eli Drake vs. Mahabali Shera/Odarg the Great

Well he was coming an hour ago, then he appeared and now he’s having a match. He even comes out to Grado’s music and doing Grado’s strut, though he’s billed from Parts Unknown. Pope even gets in a Midnight Rider reference as the match begins without a bell that I could hear. Shera drop toeholds Drake down and ties Eli’s arms up to make him do the dance.

Jesse has some better luck by taking Shera to the mat and setting up something like a Demolition Decapitator. Back up and the hot tag brings in Odarg to clean house as everything breaks down. A Sky High gets two on Jesse as Drake goes after the mask. Odarg pulls it off instead and rolls Drake up (looking him right in the face) for the pin at 5:00.

Rating: D+. Maybe it’s how much I’ve disliked this show but I had a good time with this. I can go with comedy much easier when everyone is in on the joke and they’re just having fun with it. I mean, it’s not like the Feast or Fired briefcase has had strict rules before so this is hardly a stretch. If nothing else it’s the most I’ve ever been entertained by Grado and it gives the talented Drake something to do.

Drake’s shocked look post match is great.

Post break Eli wants Grado at Lockdown but Odarg comes up to say he’ll be Drake’s opponent.

Matt Hardy/Tyrus vs. Ethan Carter III

Handicap to start. The fans are doing this awkward wave to Carter’s music and it’s really not working. Tyrus starts for the team but gets knocked back into the corner for an early beating. A t-bone suplex sends Carter flying though and we take a break. Back with Matt dropping a middle rope elbow to Ethan but Rockstar Spud comes out to be Carter’s partner. Ethan scores with a clothesline but stays in to fight Matt as the fans want Spud. A dropkick puts Matt down and the hot tag brings in Spud who actually doesn’t turn on Carter.

There goes the bowtie but Spud beats on Tyrus instead, allowing Matt to take him down with something like Big Show’s Final Cut. The Heart Punch puts Spud down but Tyrus misses a charge in the corner, allowing Spud to grab an Underdog. The real hot tag brings in Carter to face Hardy as everything breaks down. Ethan dives at both guys but they fail to catch him, leaving Carter to crash in an ugly looking landing. Back in and the Side Effect gets two on Ethan, followed by a Twist of Fate to Spud. The 1%er puts Matt away at 12:54.

Rating: C. Just a main event tag match here but I don’t buy the idea of Spud being fine with Carter less than a year after everything that happened. If there’s one thing TNA does well, it’s remember continuity like that so, as predictable as it might be, I’m kind of hoping Spud turns on Carter next week.

Overall Rating: D. This show got better in the second hour but the first hour was one of the least interesting (which is far different than worst) offerings from TNA that I’ve seen in a long time. It showcased so many of their problems: acting like WWE, setting up someone like Decay and then having them lose in their first big match and above all else, a bunch of stuff that we’ve seen before. That’s where TNA loses me: I really have no interest in seeing the same tropes that they’ve covered just a year or so ago. This got better later on, but it really had nowhere to go but up.

Results

James Storm vs. Eric Young went to a double countout

Mike Bennett b. Mandrews – Miracle in Progress

Wolves b. Decay – Brainbuster onto a chair to Steve

Odarg the Great/Mahabali Shera b. Eli Drake/Jesse Godderz – Rollup to Drake

Ethan Carter III/Rockstar Spud b. Tyrus/Matt Hardy – 1%er to Hardy

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Impact Wrestling
Date: February 9, 2016
Location: MEN Arena, Manchester, England
Attendance: 3,000
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D’Angelo Dinero

We’re out of Pennsylvania for a change as the annual Maximum Impact tour begins. That means the return of Ethan Carter III as he goes after Matt Hardy and the World Title, along with the continuation of the Kurt Angle farewell tour. The UK shows are always energetic so let’s get to it.

We open with a quick video on the UK tour.

Here are Matt Hardy and company with the champ saying the Matt Hardy brand is far more valuable than the TNA brand. He’s the one who the people should be cheering because he’s taken this company to new heights. Tyrus goes on a rant about how Carter reached the title because of his bodyguard’s efforts. Reby talks about how awesome her husband is because he’s talented, sexy and rich.

That brings us back to Matt who talks about his greatness due to beating Carter, his brother Jeff and Kurt Angle. In that whole time though, there hasn’t been a word from Dixie Carter. Therefore, Matt isn’t leaving this ring until Dixie comes out here to face him. That’s not it though as he wants the cancer known as Ethan Carter fired and that’s what Dixie will do if she wants to keep her mega star happy.

The lighting is rather dim again even though the crowd doesn’t seem that bad.

Lashley vs. Bram

We miss the opening bell because we needed to hear Eric Young bragging about ending Jeff Hardy’s career. They slug it out to start and quickly go outside with Bram getting the better of it, only to have Pope talk about Dumb and Dumber. Back in and Lashley’s leapfrog is telegraphed, allowing Bram to kick him in the ribs for two.

We hit a quick chinlock before Lashley fights up and catches him in a running powerslam (nice touch in England). The spear misses though and Lashley goes into the buckle, setting up the Brighter Side of Suffering. That’s not enough for Young though as he gets inside with the King of the Mountain Title, only to hit Bram by mistake. The spear gives Lashley the pin at 5:52.

Rating: C. I liked this better than I was expecting to but as usual the big story here continues to be how horribly Bram is used. The guy has a good look, can go in the ring and has a solid character. The solution: pair him with Eric Young, who gets all of the focus for whatever reason.

Tyrus gives Matt Hardy security to deal with Carter tonight.

Here’s Kurt Angle with something to say. He talks about being in TNA for ten years (and still being remembered as that guy who used to be awesome in WWE) and is going to be facing Lashley in his final match but here’s Maria to cut him off. After her usual speech, here’s Mike Bennett with something to say.

Bennett grew up watching Angle and beat up his brother with Kurt’s offense. Kurt wants Bennett out of his ring so Bennett says he wants to fight, which earns him a quick dispatch. Angle talks about not wanting to fight anyone that he doesn’t respect, which is why he’s fighting Drew Galloway. This brings out Galloway to point at Angle.

Bobby Roode gives James Storm the Boozer Cruiser back. They might be cashing in the Tag Team Title briefcase tonight.

X-Division Title: Trevor Lee vs. Tigre Uno

Lee is defending and has Gregory Shane Helms in his corner. Tigre sends him outside really quickly for a big flip dive, followed by a tornado DDT back inside. The champ takes over for the first time and stomps on Tigre’s bad shoulder. Some knees to the back keep Tigre in trouble but he pulls Lee to the floor and snaps off a hurricanrana off the apron. Back in and Helms trips Tigre, allowing Lee to knee him in the face and grab the fisherman’s buster to retain at 5:17.

Rating: C. See, I can live with Tigre losing here after Trevor already showed that he can beat Uno clean last week. It isn’t damaging Uno as he’s just not good enough to beat Lee no matter what, which is likely why we’ll see these guys fight two or three more times. Helms as a mentor is interesting but he needs to get in the ring at some point.

Beer Money comes out and says they want to cash in their briefcase but they get the Decay instead of the Wolves. Rosemary talks about her toys (the titles) and speaks in her rhyming style. Roode wants to fight instead of talk so let’s get a referee out here.

Decay vs. Beer Money

It’s a brawl in the aisle to start until Roode drops a knee on Steve’s ribs. Abyss breaks up a Sharpshooter and slowly pounds on Roode, only to have the chokeslam countered into a spinebuster. A double tag brings in Storm to beat on Steve and Roode throws in a Blockbuster. There’s the double suplex for both Decay villains and it’s time to SHOUT THEIR NAMES. DWI plants Steve but Abyss pulls the referee out for the DQ at 5:25.

Rating: D+. I’m really not feeling Decay as they’re really just a team that goes out there and plays the standard “we’re freaky” team role. It doesn’t help that Steve was a comedy guy who hasn’t change enough to make up for his worthless performances and Abyss is the same guy he’s been forever. Nothing to see here and Decay continues to look worthless.

Post match Decay beats on Beer Money until the Wolves come out to save Roode from Janice. The Wolves say they want their belts back so Abyss challenges them to a Monster’s Ball match next week. The champs agree of course.

Reby and Dixie Carter talk about how proud Matt is.

We’re ready for a Knockouts match but here’s Grado, recently fired, to interrupt. He has proof that he was screwed in Feast or Fired but here’s Eli Drake, flanked by security, to interrupt. Security is an inept as ever and Grado gets away while holding an envelope.

Drew Galloway says tonight is about making himself the present by beating Kurt Angle.

Jade vs. Madison Rayne

Time for more faction wars despite the factions barely being a thing at this point. Rayne spears her to the floor to start and dives onto the Dollhouse. Back in and Madison gets a quick rollup for two but Jade kicks her in the face for the same. The heel choking begins but an enziguri breaks up Jade’s double underhook. Madison scores with a running clothesline but Jade knees her in the head. The Package Piledriver puts Madison away at 4:24.

Rating: D. Is there a point coming to these matches ANYTIME soon? These teams have been feuding for weeks and now that Kong is gone, I’m not sure what else these women are supposed to do? They have no real story until Angelina Love likely returns for one more reunion of a team that was a big deal eight years ago.

Gail Kim runs in to save Madison from an attack with a chair.

Grado rants to Billy Corgan about how he was screwed. Corgan says he can’t understand a word Grado says and here’s security to drag Grado off.

Kurt Angle vs. Drew Galloway

Rematch from a few weeks back where Kurt won. Drew cranks on an armbar to start but Angle suplexes him down with ease. Off to a chinlock from Kurt as Pope thinks Angle could have been Knockouts Champion if he wanted to. Back up and a double clothesline puts both guys down and we take a break.

We come back with Drew getting out of the ankle lock and getting two off a Future Shock. They head outside with Drew walking into an Angle Slam onto the steps for two, only to have Galloway grab a reverse Alabama Slam (not Jam Pope) for the same. Drew takes him up for a super Celtic Cross for two more but he has to escape the Angle Slam. A pair of Claymores drop Kurt but he avoids a middle rope Claymore, setting up the rolling Germans.

The top rope splash gets two on Galloway, who comes right back with the third Claymore for two (so much for that move). There’s a Crossface (with Drew wrapping Kurt’s arm around his neck instead of between his legs) but as you would expect, Kurt reverses into an ankle lock, only to have Drew kick him in the knee. The crossface goes on again and Kurt taps at 15:16.

Rating: B. This is what they needed to do as Galloway can use this win a lot more than Angle. They were totally into the trading finishers style here and it worked well, mainly due to the time they were given. Angle tapping is the right ending and Galloway looks awesome (unlike the Claymore at this point), which is exactly what it needed to be.

Post match Drew bows to Kurt.

Here are Matt and company to demand Ethan’s firing. Dixie comes out but Matt cuts her off and says they’re having this discussion here. If anyone knows how to make this a success, it’s Matt Hardy, because he’s the superstar and the World Champion. The one thing he wants is Ethan Carter III gone because Ethan is the source of every problem around here. Then Matt won the title at Bound For Glory and caused the World Title Series to start up.

This brings out Rockstar Spud who is immediately the victim of short jokes. Matt still wants someone fired but Spud cuts him off to demand that Matt not disrespect Dixie like that. Hardy just wants Ethan fired but Spud won’t insult Ethan to Dixie. As bad as Ethan is, he backs up what he says. Spud thinks Matt is scared so Tyrus lays him out as Matt looks on. Matt screams at Dixie to fire Ethan but here he is for his big return. House is quickly cleaned and we’re really supposed to care about Carter vs. Tyrus.

Overall Rating: C+. It’s a good show, but the last ten minutes are built around Matt Hardy vs. Dixie Carter with Ethan Carter III vs. Tyrus as the bonus. I know Matt is doing a lot better than people were expecting him to, but it’s Matt Hardy. I really can’t get around that no matter how much I try. At the end of the day, it’s Matt Hardy getting this push that so many others could do just as well. We’ve seen the matches (they’re ok) and we’ve heard the promos (they’re not that ok) and I have no desire to see Matt Hardy in this spot. The rest of the show was good, but Matt Hardy as the centerpiece needs to wrap up soon.

Results

Lashley b. Bram – Spear

Trevor Lee b. Tigre Uno – Fisherman’s Buster

Beer Money b. Decay via DQ when Abyss pulled the referee to the floor

Jade b. Madison Rayne – Package Piledriver

Drew Galloway b. Kurt Angle – Crossface

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Impact Wrestling
Date: February 2, 2016
Location: Sands Bethlehem Events Center, Bethlehem, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D’Angelo Dinero

We’re wrapping up the Bethlehem tapings here and the big story is Matt Hardy allowing his brother Jeff to be put out of action thanks to a piledriver through a table at the hands of Eric Young. We’ll also be hearing from Ethan Carter III for the first time since he lost the title as well as Tyrus. Let’s get to it.

Ethan tells the camera crew to be at a specific place at 4pm for their interview.

Here are Matt Hardy and company to open things up. Matt talks about working with people you hate and says it was karma that sent Jeff through that table. How dare Jeff accuse Matt of tarnishing the World Title? Reby and Matt never believed that Matt wasn’t living in Jeff’s shadow but it was Jeff’ jealousy that caused his injury. This brings out Eric Young and Bram with the former shouting about how he took out Jeff and now the World Title goes through him.

Now it’s Kurt Angle coming out to get straight to the point: he gets Hardy tonight for the title. A brawl is teased but here’s Beer Money to back Angle up. Cue Abyss/Crazzy Steve/the Wolves for a big brawl with the good guys clearing the ring. Roode announces a four on four hardcore fight. Why hardcore? No reason given, but that’s the case with almost everything in the TNA main event scene.

I don’t even know what to say about these things anymore. Matt Hardy is just out there no matter what anyone thinks of him, we’re clearly just waiting around on Jeff Hardy because he’s THE STAR and someone we all care about and Eric Young is just there because he’s Eric Young and is in the main event scene because of whatever residual fallout there is from that Daniel Bryan run nearly two years ago. I have no interest in any of these people but this is what we’re getting because TNA has decided that Matt Hardy and Eric Young are stars because they’ve been around for a long time and TNA cannot make new talent.

We recap the Feast or Fired reveals from last week, including Bennett and Maria’s interruption.

Drew feels like he’s won the lottery. Tyrus comes up and tells him to walk away with the briefcase because it’s a target on his chest. That sounds like a challenge.

Lashley vs. Aiden O’Shea

O’Shea pounds him down to start and here’s that woman from a few weeks ago, now known as Raquel. How the announcers know that isn’t clear but I’m sure I’m an idiot internet fan for wondering about that. A clothesline puts Aiden on the floor but Lashley goes over to ask Raquel who she is. Back in and Aiden’s chinlock doesn’t do much as Lashley hits a quick spear for the pin at 4:48.

Rating: D. It’s nice that they’re doing something with Lashley, but the same issue persists: why in the world are they using Lashley for something like this instead of having him in the main event, or at least somewhere higher up? I do like that there’s an actual story there though instead of “Here’s Lashley. He’s really strong.”

Post match Raquel says she can bring Lashley pain or pleasure.

Here’s Maria to talk about women’s wrestling. Women’s wrestling may not need a savior but it needs a leader to point it in the right direction. She is the first lady of professional wrestling and she is the arrow and leader. The Knockouts division needs to be saved so out with the old and in with the new. This brings out Gail Kim to proclaim her respect for Maria, as is the custom throughout TNA. Maria says Gail is just a wrestler but that’s not all she can be. Gail is even more serious because this division is about wrestling and nothing more. They can fight right now but Maria leaves.

The Wolves know Beer Money is coming for the titles at some point. Storm shows off the Feast or Fired briefcase but they agree to worry about that later.

Wolves/Beer Money vs. Decay/Bram/Eric Young

This is a Hardcore War, meaning two people (Crazzy Steve and Davey Richards) start and fight for two minutes before someone else comes down to make it two on one. Everyone brings a weapon of their choice and it’s one fall to a finish. Davey’s chair is easily dispatched by Steve’s ball bat wrapped in chains but Richards uses the bat to knock the chair into Steve’s face.

Bram is in third with a turnbuckle rod and the heels take over on the floor. It’s James Storm in fourth with a beer keg that he takes forever to get to the ring. Eventually he puts it between Bram’s legs and crushes it with a chair, which the fans implore him to do one more time. Eric Young is in fifth and cleans house with a kendo stick as we take a break.

Back with Eddie in as well and the good guys in control. Bram and Young take over until it’s Abyss to complete the villains’ team with Janice. Eddie dives on the monster before he can get anywhere but Storm is holding his leg. Pope wants to know how you win this match, which really should have been established before we were fifteen minutes in. Abyss cleans house as he is known to do and it’s Bobby Roode to complete the field, though I wonder why there are such strict rules in a HARDCORE WAR.

Roode’s hockey stick gives the good guys control again and we start the parade of secondary finishers. A seven man team suplex lets all four heroes do the BEER MONEY shout but that much time being wasted allows Abyss to get us and clothesline everyone. Davey takes a Black Hole Slam as Eddie and Bram fight to the back. Steve mists Davey, allowing Abyss to hit him with a title, allowing Steve to get the pin at 19:30.

Rating: D+. So it’s Lethal Lockdown without the cage. The match was your usual example of a way to kill time on a show with no real substance to anything as control would change every time someone new came in. It’s not horrible or a total waste of time but this was way too long and lost any of its interest early on. At least the Wolves have some fresh challengers.

Angle and Galloway suck up to each other as only TNA upper midcarders can do.

Drew Galloway vs. Tyrus

Neither guy gets an entrance. Tyrus gets in a cheap shot to start but Drew hammers away in the corner. We’re already in the nerve hold for a bit before Tyrus misses a charge into the post. Drew chops away and drops him with a top rope shot to the head. That earns him a Heart Punch from Tyrus and some BORING chants from the crowd, only to have Drew powerbomb the big man out of the corner. The lights go out and here’s Mike Bennett with the briefcase to knock out Galloway for the DQ at 5:41.

Rating: D. The fans were right about that BORING chant. The problem here is how can you get something interesting out of a guy Tyrus’ size when he wrestles such a big power style offense? Drew vs. Bennett should be fun enough but I could have gone for something more interesting to get us there.

Post match Bennett looks down at Drew and does his usual “do you believe in miracles” speech.

Angle talks about possibly retiring as champion when Lashley comes up to say how awesome it would be to win the title back from Angle in the same place Kurt took the title from him last year.

X-Division Title: Tigre Uno vs. Gregory Shane Helms

Not so fast actually as Helms never said the match was against him. Here’s what we get instead.

X-Division Title: Tigre Uno vs. Trevor Lee

Lee is challenging of course and thank goodness it’s someone fresh. Tigre is in early trouble but a dropkick sends Lee to the floor. A running clothesline drops the champ for two and it’s time for some mask ripping. Tigre comes back with a dropkick and dive over the top but that cool standing double stomp puts Uno down again. The fisherman’s buster into a small packages gives Lee the title at 4:50.

Rating: C-. So after all that time with Tigre winning match after match, he loses clean in five minutes? I can actually live with that as the division has been dying for some fresh blood for years now. Also it’s not like any of this matters until the main event guys remember the X-Divison is a thing at Destination X anyway so this doesn’t mean a ton. Lee is rather different too so this is a bit better.

Up next is the World Title match. Or maybe Ethan’s interview as they both say “up next”.

The big interview with Ethan is a promo about being undefeated for two years and then realizing that he’s kind of been a jerk. The winning got to him until Matt Hardy took everything to put him down. It took the thing he loved the most, the TNA World Title, to finally keep him down. He’s coming back to be Matt’s shadow and take back what belongs to him. Good stuff here as usual, but unfortunately we’re likely stuck waiting for Jeff to be the big conquering hero because of reasons.

TNA World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Matt Hardy

Hardy is defending and an early Reby distraction lets the champ get in a bulldog for two. Tyrus rakes the eyes to slow Kurt down again and Matt grabs a chinlock. Angle fights up and scores with an Angle Slam for two we as take a break. Back with the straps coming down and the ankle lock going on until Matt flips him out to the floor. Tyrus runs Kurt over and goes over to mess with Pope for some reason. Both finishers are countered and it’s right back to the ankle lock until Matt rolls through into a cradle for two.

The Side Effect gets the same, followed by the Angle Slam for two more. It’s time to roll some Germans, drawing the required SUPLEX CITY chant. Matt finally pulls the referee’s shirt over his eyes, allowing a low blow to set up the Twist of Fate for two. More German suplexes allow Angle to go up, only to have Reby offer a distraction. A Twist of Fate (Diamond Cutter really) off the ropes allows Matt to retain at 14:00.

Rating: C+. It was good and a solid way to make Matt look like a bigger deal but there’s a limit to how far he can go because, at the end of the day, it’s Matt Hardy. To be fair, the wrestling is much better than the talking and thankfully this was a good enough match to make up for a lot of bad stuff earlier tonight.

Overall Rating: D+. The second hour was indeed much better but the first really made this a rough sit. Listening to Matt talk about how iconic he is and hearing about how Eric Young is such an important World Title player again and again is rapidly becoming some of the most ridiculous stuff I’ve heard in a long time.

As was my problem last year, there are so many people that TNA could use in their World Title scene but we’re getting these guys who are “names” instead of people who might be interesting. It doesn’t help that TNA is incapable of getting through something quickly so this is what we’re likely stuck with for a few more very long months. Carter will help, but there’s only so much he can do as a filler challenger.

Results

Lashley b. Aiden O’Shea – Spear

Decay/Bram/Eric Young b. Beer Money/Wolves – Title belt to Richards

Drew Galloway b. Tyrus via DQ when Mike Bennett interfered

Trevor Lee b. Tigre Uno – Fisherman’s Buster

Matt Hardy b. Kurt Angle – Super Twist of Fate

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01AXP08DK

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6