Impact Wrestling – May 12, 2021: There Are Six Of Them

Impact Wrestling
Date: May 13, 2021
Location: Skyway Studios, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: D’Lo Brown, Matt Striker

It is the go home show for Under Siege and we have the lineup for the show’s six way #1 contenders match main event. That leaves tonight as little more than a standard go home show, which means we could be in for a rather fun show. Impact has been holding my interest fairly well lately so hopefully they can keep it up. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

Havok vs. Rosemary

The winner gets a Knockouts Title shot against Deonna Purrazzo at Under Siege and the rest of Decay is here with Rosemary. They shake hands and then yell at each other a lot. Rosemary hammers away with forearms but bounces off of Havok. More shouting sets up stereo running boots before Havok sends her face first into the buckle.

There’s a running boot in the corner for two and Havok grabs the camel clutch. That’s broken up and Rosemary counters a charge into the Upside Down to slow Havok down for a change. Rosemary somehow manages a t-bone suplex for two but Havok pulls her up into the Tombstone for the pin out of nowhere at 6:02.

Rating: C-. Rosemary got to show off some surprising power here but Havok winning is another way to go. I can imagine Rosemary getting a title shot of her own in the near future, but they very well may hold off on that until Slammiversary. Havok will do very well for now and it should be a good power vs. technical title match.

Post match here is Deonna Purrazzo to go after Havok but she gets knocked outside. Rosemary throws her back in and Decay cuts off Kimber Lee and Susan. The Tombstone plants Purrazzo.

Here is what is coming tonight and at Under Siege.

The Good Brothers are ready for tonight and Saturday. Kenny Omega says he is the game changer and the reason why the team is back on track. Violence and success are promised, though Omega having all three belts on didn’t help the seriousness.

Petey Williams vs. Ace Austin vs. Acey Romero vs. TJP vs. Rohit Raju vs. El Phantasmo

One fall and the winner gets the X-Division Title shot at Under Siege. Madman Fulton, Mahabali Shera and Larry D. are all at ringside. Romero gets jumped to start but manages to shove them away so we can get down to the usual insanity that these matches bring. Romero pulls Austin off the apron and sends him into the barricade but TJP nails a slingshot dropkick to finally put the monster down.

That gives us TJP vs. Phantasmo with the former snapping off a great running hurricanrana. Phantasmo is back up for a rope walk….but stops to pick up Austin for a Death Valley Driver off the top and onto the pile, because that’s something he can do. We take a break and come back with TJP sending Raju into the corner for some standing/running kicks to the face.

Romero comes back in to sweep Raju’s legs and hit a splash to the back for two. Phantasmo gets to clean a bit of house but Williams hits a slingshot Codebreaker. The Canadian Destroyer gets two on Phantasmo but Austin is back with a running kick to the head. A short string of dives sets up the brawl between the seconds, leaving TJP to hit the Detonation Kick on Phantasmo. The Mamba Splash misses though and Phantasmo hits a top rope splash of his own to TJP. Williams makes the save but walks into Phantasmo’s arm trap Neutralizer for the pin at 10:15.

Rating: C+. The action was good, but I’m not bit on these wild multi person matches. There is no flow or story to them and they are just a bunch of spots until someone gets the pin. The spots were good and some of the stuff was entertaining, but I can only get so into them. Granted Phantasmo vs. Josh Alexander could be incredible.

Susan and Kimber Lee comes in to show Scott D’Amore a clip of Tenille Dashwood on her phone. The result: Susan/Lee vs. Dashwood/Taylor Wilde at Under Siege.

Flashback Moment of the Week: Havok b. Gail Kim for the Knockouts Title on the October 1, 2014 Impact.

Violent By Design says failure will not be tolerated and must be crushed. Eric Young isn’t sure what caused the problem but then he realized that the sickness is the problem. Nothing is guaranteed and change is the only thing you can trust. You’ll be seeing a lot of them.

We go to Swinger’s Palace where Alisha Edwards is now working, presumably to pay off her debts. Ace Austin and Madman Fulton come in to name themselves #1 contenders to the Tag Team Titles but some other teams come in to disagree. TJP knows he could get a title shot with the right partner, so here is Petey Williams (the amount of dirt he has on this company must be astounding) to tease the Scott Steiner promo on the odds of the title change. That is cut off in a hurry, and a multi team match seems likely.

Sam Beale vs. Willie Mack

Mack starts fast with the swinging slam into the standing moonsault for two before hurting his hand on some shots to the face. Beale gets in a kick to the face, followed by a few knees to the ribs. A pop up right hand drops Beale and the frog splash finishes him off at 3:22.

Rating: D+. Just a quick match here to get Mack some momentum going into the Under Siege match against Morrissey. I’m not sure why Mack hasn’t gone a little bit further around here but at least he has a big enough match set up for the show. This was a squash, but Beale has looked decent in his appearances.

Post match here is W. Morrissey to drop Mack again.

David Finlay, with Juice Robinson and Eddie Edwards, is ready for Karl Anderson tonight. The other two are ready for the Under Siege six man tag too. Eddie has even brought back Kenny the Kendo Stick.

Slammiversary ad, featuring various recently released WWE stars and past Impact names.

It’s time for It’s All About Me with Tenille Dashwood and her guest….Kaleb With A K. Taylor Wilde comes in to have a chat of her own, as she doesn’t like Dashwood cheating last week. They couldn’t really talk about it because she doesn’t have Dashwood’s number as they aren’t friends. Under Siege is a one off because they are not friends or partners. Kaleb With A K: “Hashtag awkward.” Dashwood seems cool with it though.

Karl Anderson vs. David Finlay

Doc Gallows, Kenny Omega, Don Callis, Eddie Edwards and Juice Robinson are all here too. Anderson starts hammering away but Finlay pops him in the jaw a few times. Some of the seconds offer trips but Gallows gets in another trip to take over. Finlay is sent outside for some choking against the barricade so commentary can talk about Japan.

Back in and Anderson hammers away before raking away at the eyes. We hit the chinlock for all of five seconds before Anderson blasts him with a clothesline. Another chinlock is countered into a hard belly to back and Finlay slingshot dives onto Omega and Gallows. An Indian Deathlock goes on back inside but Omega comes in for the DQ at 5:50.

Rating: C-. This was another match that didn’t have the time to go anywhere but it wasn’t supposed to be anything more. They previewed Saturday’s six man and while your mileage might vary on the story, what we got here was certainly good enough. If nothing else, it was another week without Omega talking and that’s a good thing.

Post match the brawl is on and Kenny the Kendo Stick is enough to chase the villains off.

Chris Sabin feels bad for not having James Storm’s back in Storm’s qualifying match. He’ll face Moose tonight in a six man tag and we’ll see what happens.

Video on Under Siege.

Earlier tonight on Before The Impact, Tasha Steelz beat Jordynne Grace.

Grace is upset over the loss but Rachael Ellering tells her to save it for Under Siege.

Brian Myers vs. Crazzy Steve

Steve takes him down for a very quick two and Myers is a bit scared in the corner. He even bails to the floor where Black Taurus scares him again, earning an ejection as we take a break. Back with Myers kicking Steve in the head and grabbing a chinlock. That’s broken up but so is Steve’s tornado DDT. Myers grabs a rollup for the pin with feet on the ropes at 7:17. Not enough shown to rate but it keeps the Myers vs. Decay feud going, as odd as it might be.

Post match Black Taurus comes back in to run Myers over and leaves a death card.

Don Callis doesn’t like how this place is being run but here is Scott D’Amore to interrupt. D’Amore remembers Callis messing with Moose’s head last week, which is why James Storm is out of action with an injury. Maybe Callis needs to figure out if he is an AEW manager or an Impact Wrestling executive.

Under Siege rundown.

Chris Sabin/Matt Cardona/Trey Miguel vs. Moose/Sami Callihan/Chris Bey

Callihan takes Sabin into the corner to start but a crucifix gives Sabin a quick two. Cardona comes in but gets taken down by Bey as we see the Elite watching in the back. It’s off to Miguel, who jumps over Cardona for a backsplash onto Bey. The Pendulum has Bey in more trouble but Bey misses a jumping double stomp. Bey kicks Miguel down without much trouble and we take a break.

We come back with Moose hammering on Miguel and handing it off to Callihan for some chops in the corner. Miguel gets two off a sunset flip, earning himself a dropkick from Bey. Moose is back in with a one handed slam and the two handed version puts him down just as quickly. Now it’s Callihan coming back in for a slam into a chinlock. That’s broken up in a hurry and Miguel kicks him in the head, setting up a double clothesline for the double knockdown.

The hot tag brings in Cardona to clean house, with Sabin tagging himself in for a missile dropkick/Downward Spiral combination. Everything breaks down and Miguel counters Moose’s powerbomb into a hurricanrana into the post. Bey forearms Sabin, who counters the package piledriver. Back in and Miguel missile dropkicks Moose back to the floor but Callihan package piledrives Sabin for the pin at 14:37.

Rating: C+. This was the exactly right idea to build up the Under Siege six way and it gives us an interesting twist with Sami getting some momentum. He might be a wild card in the match and that could be what the match needs. Moose would still seem to be the heavy favorite and was treated like a monster here, but there are a good many options (six I believe).

Moose and Callihan get in a shoving match post match.

Callis looks worried to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The point of this show was to make me want to see Under Siege and they did that well enough. It still isn’t a show that means very much with both main events being matches designed to set up things later but they made it fairly interesting here. That’s a tricky thing to do and they did a nice job here, so well done enough.

Results

Havok b. Rosemary – Tombstone

El Phantasmo b. Ace Austin, TJP, Rohit Raju, Petey Williams and Acey Romero – Arm trap faceplant to Williams

Willie Mack b. Sam Beale – Six Star Frog Splash

David Finlay b. Karl Anderson via DQ when Kenny Omega interfered

Brian Myers b. Crazzy Steve – Rollup with a grab of the rope

Sami Callihan/Chris Bey/Moose b. Chris Sabin/Matt Cardona/Trey Miguel – Package piledriver to Sabin

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – May 6, 2021: The Streamlined Edition

Impact Wrestling
Date: May 6, 2021
Location: Skyway Studios, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Matt Striker, D’Lo Brown

We’re still in the early days of the Kenny Omega era and we are also on the way to Under Siege. Since Omega isn’t working that show, we need his #1 contender, meaning the six way #1 contenders match at Under Siege needs some more qualifiers. That’s what Impact is for at the moment so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

Chris Sabin vs. Rhino

James Storm and Violent By Design are here too. They trade arm control to start until Sabin sends him outside. Back in and Rhino hits him in the face before hammering Sabin down in the corner. The neck crank goes on but Sabin fights up and hits a discus forearm. There’s an enziguri to put Rhino on the floor and a rollup gives Sabin two back inside. Deaner offers a distraction though and Rhino pokes him in the eye to take over. Sabin is fine enough to kick out the knee to block the Gore though and la majistral finishes Rhino at 6:46.

Rating: C-. Just a match here as almost anything involving Violent By Design has almost no interest. The team feels like a bunch of people thrown together to give Eric Young something to do, and since Young is injured, the team does not exactly seem like it matters all that much. They aren’t the worst by any means, but Rhino felt like an obstacle rather than a threat, which only kind of worked.

Here’s what’s coming tonight.

Brian Myers is annoyed at losing to Matt Cardona so he wants another qualifying match. He runs into Rosemary, who says he has no one to blame for his problems but himself. Myers doesn’t buy it, so here is Black Taurus to run him over. Rosemary gives him a card, which seems to suggest that he is having bad luck.

The Elite thinks that was hilarious but Don Callis says they need to focus on winning more matches. That’s why tonight it’s Doc Gallows vs. Juice Robinson.

Susan vs. Taylor Wilde

Kimber Lee is here with Susan. Wilde cartwheels out of a waistlock to start but Susan can’t do the same. Instead Wilde throws her down as Striker talks about all of the styles that Wilde uses. Susan sends her into the corner but misses a legdrop as Tenille Dashwood and Kaleb With A K come out to watch. Wilde’s German suplex sends Susan to the floor, setting up a hurricanrana to take her down again. A quick glare at Dashwood doesn’t change anything, as Wilde hits a bridging German suplex for the pin at 2:28.

Post match Dashwood comes in to pose for a photo with Wilde, who doesn’t seem interested.

Deonna Purrazzo isn’t scared of Taylor Wilde but Susan and Kimber Lee need to earn the right to have her join them at ringside. Decay comes in and, after scaring off the interviewer, seem to threaten Purrazzo. Havok comes in to say she wants a shot as well, so a flustered Purrazzo says they can fight for a title shot.

W. Morrissey says no one knows him but he knows that all of the fans left him as soon as he started to fall apart. Everyone he thought he knew in this business was a phony but now he has risen from the ashes. At Under Siege, he’s starting with Willie Mack.

Rohit Raju vs. Trey Miguel

Under Siege qualifying match and Shera is here with Raju. They lock up to start with Miguel trying to pull him down so Raju bails outside in a hurry. Back in and they go to a test of strength with Raju taking him down, only to have Miguel nip up. That earns him a takedown and Raju is rather pleased as we take a break. Back with Shera getting in a cheap shot but Miguel strikes away at the face to put him up against the ropes.

What looks like a northern lights suplex is blocked so Raju suplexes him down for two. Raju knocks him to the floor and then takes it back inside to start cranking on the arm. A flying armbar makes it worse but Miguel flips over him and hits a jumping stomp to the back. They slug it out from their knees until Miguel suplexes him into a Kimura. That’s broken up as well until Raju crotches him in the corner and hits a hanging DDT. A Falcon Arrow into a Crossface has Miguel in trouble until he rolls out but gets kneed in the face. Miguel kicks him down again though and grabs the Hourglass for the tap at 11:27.

Rating: B-. Good back and forth match here as I continue to try and get my head around the idea of Raju actually being this entertaining. I know I say that rather often, but he was so terrible as part of the Desi Hit Squad. It’s amazing how much better it is to just have him as a guy instead of a guy there to make a legend look good. Miguel gets another boost here and it wouldn’t stun me to see him get the title shot.

Post match here’s Jake Something to knock Shera down and take out Raju as well. Yeah is name is still Jake Something.

We go to Swinger’s Palace and Alisha Edwards seems to have lost all of her money. Trey Miguel comes in and gets in a bit of an argument with the other people who have qualified for Under Siege over betting odds. James Storm insists he’ll be getting in too but Chris Bey gets in Storm and Chris Sabin’s heads over being tag wrestlers getting into singles matches. Storm doesn’t seem interested.

Doc Gallows vs. Juice Robinson

Kenny Omega, Karl Anderson and David Finlay are here too. Gallows goes straight to the eye to start and hits an uppercut in the corner. Robinson sends him into the corner to even things up and some left hands have Gallows down. Back up and Gallows big boots him out to the floor, followed by the rights and lefts to the ribs.

The chinlock goes on, though Gallows does give him a breather to drive in the elbows to the chest. Robinson fights out of another chinlock and dropkicks the knee out, setting up a running DDT for two. The big left hand drops Gallows but Robinson has to go after Anderson. A bicycle kick into the chokebomb (and a good one at that) finishes Robinson at 7:19.

Rating: C. Gallows still isn’t nearly as good of a big man as he is given credit for but he worked well enough here. This was about Gallows beating up Robinson, who kept trying to fight from underneath. The numbers game catching up with him made sense and it did a nice job with what they were trying. Also, the lack of Omega talking tends to help a lot.

Post match the beatdown is on so Eddie Edwards runs down for a failed save attempt.

Deonna Purrazzo, Susan and Kimber Lee are leaving when Scott D’Amore comes up. Next week: Havok vs. Rosemary for the Under Siege title shot.

VSK vs. El Phantasmo

VSK is an AEW Dark guy and Phantasmo is from New Japan’s Bullet Club. Phantasmo starts fast by jumping over him but VSK hits a dropkick into a backbreaker. A slam into an immediate splash (that’s a new one) gets two but Phantasmo is right back by putting him on the top. Phantasmo pulls him back down for a crash and a Lionsault gets two. VSK is right back with a rollup for two and a fireman’s carry backbreaker connects for the same. That earns him some kicks to the chest and, after possibly loading up the boot, Phantasmo hits a superkick for the pin at 3:13.

Rating: C+. Phantasmo is awesome, but this seemed to be more about building up VSK than anything else. That being said, it isn’t like Phantasmo needs that much of a build as he is the big guest star. VSK did look good in defeat, though it is kind of hard to say how much of that was him when he was in there with such an established name.

Rachael Ellering vs. Kiera Hogan

Jordynne Grace and Tasha Steelz are here too. An early Steelz distraction lets Kiera hit a superkick and it’s already time to stomp Ellering in the corner. A kick to the ribs has Ellering in more trouble but she avoids a charge in the corner. Ellering counters a neckbreaker but gets caught with a running knee to the head for two. The chinlock goes on but they get up and collide so Ellering can get in a kick to the head. There’s a backsplash for two, only to have Ellering miss a charge of her own in the corner and get kicked in the face again. They miss some shots to the face until Ellering hits a swinging Boss Man Slam for the pin at 4:33.

Rating: C-. They didn’t really have a good way to go here as you don’t want either of them losing, though in this case, it makes more sense to go with the person who is still new to the company (yet is somehow a champion). The action was hardly great, though that has never quite been Hogan’s strong suit. It wasn’t exactly great, but it did what it was supposed to do….I think.

Don Callis comes up to Moose in the back and brings up football coach Jimmy Johnson. Callis talks about Johnson saying stars should be treated like stars, which is what Moose certainly is. Why is he in some qualifying match when he is already a star? Moose tells him to shut up, but Moose might be slightly convinced.

Fire N Flava are annoyed at the loss but Jordynne Grace and Rachael Ellering come up. Trash is talked until Grace vs. Steelz is set for next week.

Here’s what’s coming next week.

James Storm vs. Moose

Final Under Siege qualifying match. Storm’s headlock doesn’t last very long and Moose shoulders him away without much effort. A shot to the face knocks Moose outside though and Storm adds a dropkick through the ropes as we take a break. Back with Storm being sent to the apron, where Moose blocks the enziguri in the corner. Moose dumps him outside without much effort and sends him knee first into the barricade.

The knee is rammed into the floor as well, followed by some stomping back inside. Moose talks a lot of trash but Storm fights up and gets in a few right hands, only to get knocked back down. A running dropkick to the knee connects in the corner and Storm is in even more trouble. The leglock goes on but Moose gets caught holding the rope. That’s fine with Moose, who works on the knee even more with some cranking. Moose misses a charge though and Storm slugs away, including the Thesz press with right hands to the jaw (there’s a Moose Jaw, Saskatchewan joke in there somewhere).

The Codebreaker rocks Moose again and there’s a tornado DDT for two. Moose is back up with a tackle to the knee though and we hit the half crab. That doesn’t last long either so Moose goes up, with Storm pulling him into the Eye of the Storm….but the leg gives out. Storm takes his time getting up but manages a Last Call out of nowhere. The knee is too bad to cover though and Moose hits the spear for the pin at 16:08.

Rating: B. This was close enough to a main event style match to fit in this spot. Moose working on the knee throughout the match and then having it play into the whole thing worked out well. Moose has been primed for the title shot for a long time now and beating Storm feels like something that matters. Good match in the right spot with the right result so that’s a nice job.

Post match Moose Pillmanizes the leg with Chris Sabin running out just a bit too late for the save.

Overall Rating: B-. They had a very streamlined show here to set up a lot of Under Siege in a hurry. It was almost weird having a bunch of singles matches in a row but it was what they needed to do here. The six way could go to multiple people and they set up enough stuff for the coming shows to make this a pretty good use of two hours.

Results

Chris Sabin b. Rhino – La majistral

Taylor Wilde b. Susan – Bridging German suplex

Trey Miguel b. Rohit Raju – Hourglass

Doc Gallows b. Juice Robinson – Chokebomb

El Phantasmo b. VSK – Superkick

Rachael Ellering b. Kiera Hogan – Swinging Boss Man Slam

Moose b. James Storm – Spear

 

 

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Rebellion 2021: Just Like The Cha Cha Championships In 58

Rebellion 2021
Date: April 25, 2021
Location: Skyway Studios, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: D’Lo Brown, Matt Striker

Rich Swann vs. Kenny Omega, title for title. I would talk about the rest of the show but none of it matters in the slightest, which you would know if you have been watching the TV shows. Nothing else has gotten any significant attention in the build, which does make some sense. Hopefully it lives up to the considerable hype. Let’s get to it.

The opening sequence focuses on Omega vs. Swann, with Omega talking about how being the best goes so far beyond being the best in the ring. The rest of the card gets far less attention.

X-Division Title: TJP vs. Ace Austin vs. Josh Alexander

Austin, with Madman Fulton, is defending. Alexander and TJP go after the champ to start with Austin kicking Alexander in the head. TJP gets taken down so Alexander goes for the ankle lock on Austin. That’s broken up so Alexander gets caught in TJP’s Octopus hold. With that not lasting long either, TJP sends them both outside where Austin bails out of a Lionsault. Striker goes into a speech about how Ace Austin isn’t in the new Micro Brawler series while TJP is, which will have Austin wondering why a kid is playing with TJP and not him. Brown: “Actually Austin is in the series too.” And we move on.

With Alexander on the floor, Ace loads up the (special edition) playing card on TJP’s hand but the referee takes it away. Alexander comes back in and captures Austin’s arm for something close to a German suplex as Striker talks about how we don’t need two referees. Everyone is back in and Austin monkey flips TJP into Alexander’s powerbomb but kicks Alexander in the ribs, allowing TJP to snap off a hurricanrana instead.

TJP is back up with a running boot to Austin in the corner, setting up a superplex/Russian legsweep combination to put everyone down at the same time. Back up and Alexander goes for the ankle lock on Austin but gets pulled into TJP’s kneebar. That’s fine with Alexander, who grabs an ankle lock on Austin at the same time.

Everyone escapes as I try to get my head around the odds of holds like that only happening in TJP matches. With that broken up again, we get another triple submission with the same result. The Fold is broken up so Alexander hits Divine Intervention on TJP with Austin making the save. Alexander locks Austin’s ankle but TJP comes in with the Mamba splash. Fulton breaks up the cover, leaving Alexander to hit Divine Intervention to pin Austin at 11:11.

Rating: B. That’s all this should have been and it worked out well. Above all else, they didn’t stop with the action and that is how they set the match up over the last few weeks. I like Alexander winning the title as he has needed to show that he can do something without Ethan Page. Now he can go and have one good match after another with just about anyone so I’m certainly pleased with the result. Now hopefully they can come close to living up to this level.

We run down the card that you already paid to see.

Violent By Design is ready for an eight man tag, even with Eric Young injured. He talks to someone we can’t see and says that they are getting the chance to start something. Whoever it is isn’t ready for the full thing, but they can do something tonight.

We recap Violent By Design vs. Chris Sabin/James Storm/Willie Mack/Eddie Edwards. Violent By Design are all evil and want to hurt people so the other four are standing up to them. Eric Young is hurt though and we are going to need a replacement.

Violent By Design vs. James Storm/Willie Mack/Eddie Edwards/Chris Sabin

The mystery partner is….W. Morrissey, better known as Big Cass (that is a horrible ring name). Sabin kicks at Rhino’s arm to start as Eric Young is sitting on the stage in a chair. It’s off to Storm, who shoves Deaner into the corner so Morrissey can come in. Morrissey looks great as Storm punches him in the face and then catches him on top. A big boot knocks Storm to the floor and Morrissey knocks the rest of the team off the apron.

It’s off to Doering to run Storm over for two but Storm hits a running neckbreaker on Rhino. Mack comes in off the hot tag to clean house as everything breaks down. Deaner and Rhino get caught in the Tree of Woe for some running kicks, followed by Storm’s top rope elbow to Deaner for two. Morrissey tags himself in and starts running people over, including taking out Sabin’s leg on the apron.

Storm cannonballs off the apron to drop Rhino and Sabin catches Deaner on top….for the superplex onto the pile (with Deaner slipping so the landing wasn’t great). Back in and Mack Stunners Doering to the floor but Morrissey is back in for the East River Crossing and the pin on Mack at 10:07.

Rating: C. Morrissey is the story here and he looked good at what he did. The question, as usual though, is what is going on in his head. If he can have the mental side of things down, he could be quite the asset. That and if you don’t bring Enzo Amore in as well, because that comes off as little more than a rehash of something that was only so good in the first place. Good debut here and a fun match, though I’m not sure how far the team can go without Eric Young.

We recap Brian Myers vs. Matt Cardona. Myers seemed to want to reform the team but Cardona wanted to do something on his own for once.

Brian Myers vs. Matt Cardona

Myers slaps him in the face instead of shaking hands so Cardona unloads on him in the corner. The Reboot is loaded up but Myers bails to the floor and takes Cardona out with him. Myers gets sent over the barricade, where he manages to snap Cardona’s back over the steel. Cardona gets hit in the head and they go inside for some elbows to give Myers two. The chinlock with a knee in the back goes on for a bit until Cardona fights up to make the clothesline comeback.

They head outside again with Cardona nailing Radio Silence to put them both down. Myers is up first with a spear and they head back inside with an elbow giving Myers two. Cardona is back with an Unprettier for two and can’t believe the kickout. More Radio Silence is broken up and Cardona’s knee buckles on the landing. The referee calls for help and Myers checks on Cardona….before decking him. The Roster Cut finishes Cardona at 9:48.

Rating: C. I’ve seen worse as they both brought the anger and intensity. Throw in the pretty well done false injury angle at the end and they had some good stuff here. Cardona and Myers need to get away from each other, but the ending seems to suggest that we aren’t done yet. And get Myers a better finisher, because it’s still just a clothesline.

Tony Khan is here and lists off all of his AEW job titles. He has Aubrey Edwards here as his referee for the main event but Scott D’Amore has Brian Hebner. Khan: “What’s your last name again?” They’ll both referee the main event.

We recap Fire N Flava defending the Knockouts Tag Team Titles against Jordynne Grace/Rachael Ellering. Grace needed a partner after Jazz retired so Ellering debuted to get the title shot.

Knockouts Tag Team Titles: Jordynne Grace/Rachael Ellering vs. Fire N Flava

Fire N Flava is defending but here is Jazz to second the challengers, which Striker treats as the biggest thing that he has ever seen. Ellering powers Hogan around to start and lifts her up to block a headlock attempt. Grace comes in to throw Hogan around as well but it is too early for the Grace Driver.

Steelz comes in for a kick to Grace’s face for two before taking her into the corner for the stomping. Hogan comes in to stomp away but Grace powers her way over for the hot tag to Ellering. House is cleaned and everything breaks down, with the champs being sent to the apron for stereo missile dropkicks for stereo near falls.

Grace is back up and backdrops Steelz over the top but she grabs a cutter on Ellering on the way down (while crashing onto the apron). Grace leaves a dive mostly short and Hogan dives onto everyone at once. Steelz and Grace knock each other down on the floor as Ellering forearms Hogan into a fisherman’s suplex swung forward into a spinebuster (that’s a new one) for the pin at 9:24. Jazz added nothing here.

Rating: D+. Sure why not. It’s not like the titles have any meaning or that there are more than a few regular teams to go after them in the first place. Ellering and Grace winning doesn’t change much but you had to take the titles off of Fire N Flava sooner or later so this works as well as anything else. The botches didn’t help things and the ending was flat, but it could have been miles worse.

We recap Sami Callihan vs. Trey Miguel. Trey came back recently and Sami wants him to show more passion. This has involved hurting him over and over so tonight it’s Last Man Standing so Miguel can show his heart.

Trey Miguel vs. Sami Callihan

Last Man Standing. Sami starts fast by sending Miguel outside in a huge crash for a seven count. That works for Callihan, who follows him out but gets caught with Sliced Bread on the floor. Miguel swings into a hurricanrana to send Sami down again but the suicide dive only hits barricade. Brown: “Where is Sami going now?” Striker: “Mentally? Physically? Spiritually?”

They head up to the stage with Miguel being powerbombed onto an anvil case. It’s time to open said case with Sami finding and throwing away a wrench. Instead he pulls out some chains to wrap around his fists to knock Miguel down again. The wrench is put into Miguel’s mouth because we need to do something out there in a Callihan match. They head inside with a bunch of weapons included, including a table being turned upside down with the legs being set up.

Callihan isn’t having any of Miguel’s comeback and slams him onto the open legs for the scary spot of the night. Miguel is sat on top with Sami throwing a chair at him, setting up a super piledriver not through the table, because that table is very sturdy. They both beat the count and head outside as Striker quotes the Bible about never turning back.

Sami sets the steps on their side on the floor and piledrives Miguel onto the side for another nasty crash. The steps are laid on top of Miguel but he slips out the other side, which Striker thinks is like a magic trick because Striker is easily impressed. A huge cutter from the apron through the table is enough to finish Sami at 15:35.

Rating: C+. Yes there were a lot of impressive spots and Miguel showed heart, but if a super piledriver onto a table doesn’t finish you, why in the world should someone try a wrestling move on you? That slam onto the steps looked great though and Sami is going to be at his best in something like this, so I’m not surprised that this wound up working out as well as it did.

We recap FinJuice vs. the Good Brothers for the Tag Team Titles. FinJuice took the titles from the Brothers and then went back to New Japan, so tonight is the big rematch. The Good Brothers want their titles back and are extra serious this time.

FinJuice vs. Good Brothers

The Brothers are challenging with Doc Gallows looking rather Jesse Venturaish during their entrances. Finlay takes Anderson down to start and Robinson gets dropped onto him for two as the champs take over early. Anderson shrugs off the arm cranking and it’s off to Gallows for the rights and lefts in the corner. A double bulldog gets two on Gallows but he’s back up to power Finlay into the corner.

Gallows hits a kick to the head for two and we hit the chinlock. Some hammer elbows keep Finlay down until Gallows puts him on the middle rope. That’s fine with Finlay, who scores with the middle elbow elbow to the jaw. The hot tag brings in Robinson to clean house, including a backsplash to Gallows. A dive to the floor takes Gallows down again and the jabs put Anderson down as well.

Everything breaks down, with Striker talking about FinJuice being influenced by the Hart Foundation, Demolition and….the Smoking Gunns? Gallows is knocked to the floor so FinJuice can load up a Doomsday Device, only to have Gallows break it up. The belly to back suplex/neckbreaker combination gets two on Robinson but Finlay is back in to break up the Magic Killer. A small package Anderson to retain at 10:32.

Rating: C+. And with that, we have proof of which team is the most Japan of all time. I’m rather surprised at the lack of a title change but it wouldn’t surprise me to see the Young Bucks being brought in to become the bestest tag team ever in the history of ever. Good enough match, but hearing all of the Japan references and having FinJuice leave for a month didn’t help my interest.

Don Callis is ready to see Kenny Omega win the Impact World Title because he is in Rich Swann’s head. Callis and Omega are family but Swann is an orphan who isn’t going home with his toy. Callis has envisioned this for years and tonight it is reality.

We recap Tenille Dashwood vs. Deonna Purrazzo for the Knockouts Title. Purrazzo is the unstoppable champion who cam make anyone submit while Dashwood is obsessed with herself and wants the title to prove her great she is.

Knockouts Title: Deonna Purrazzo vs. Tenille Dashwood

Purrazzo is defending, Susan, Kimber Lee and Kaleb With A K are all here. Purrazzo goes straight for the arm to send Dashwood bailing away in a smart move. A clothesline gives Purrazzo two and it’s time to wrap Dashwood’s arm around her own throat for a chinlock. Back up and they trade shots to the face, setting up the Tarantula on Purrazzo. A high crossbody (warranting a three sentence description from Striker) gives Dashwood two but Purrazzo is right back with the German suplex.

Dashwood is right back with an STF but Lee offers a distraction, drawing Kaleb With A K over. The brawl is on outside and Dashwood hits the Spotlight Kick. Lee pulls Dashwood to the floor to break up the count, allowing Purrazzo to hit an exploder back inside. The Fujiwara armbar is countered with a quick roll so Purrazzo settles for the Queen’s Gambit and the pin at 9:47.

Rating: C-. This didn’t have time to go very far with everything else going on. At the same time, there is only so much that you can do with a heel vs. heel match without the most detailed reason for a feud. Purrazzo is rapidly cleaning out the division but odds are some free agents/the returning Taylor Wilde should give her some fresh opponents.

Post match the beatdown seems imminent but Taylor Wilde returns and cleans house, setting up the staredown with Purrazzo.

We run down the upcoming Impact Plus slate, capped off by a video for Slammiversary in July, featuring Samoa Joe, Chelsea Greene and Mickie James.

We recap Kenny Omega vs. Rich Swann, World Title vs. World Title. Omega came in and was treated like the greatest thing ever so Impact World Champion Swann didn’t think much of it. Then Omega pinned him in a six man tag, setting up the title vs. title match. Swann has as much chance of winning tonight as I do of winning the 1958 Hong Kong Cha Cha Championship so let’s get to the inevitable.

Impact Wrestling World Title/AEW World Title: Rich Swann vs. Kenny Omega

Title or title, Eddie Edwards, Willie Mack and Tony Khan are here, Mauro Ranallo is on commentary, there is a referee from each company and Don Callis does an amazing over the top introduction for Omega, listing off every legend he can think of, all of whom are beneath Omega. Swann gets knocked down to the floor in a hurry but is right back with a dropkick to the floor. There’s the big flip dive to take Omega down again but he is right back with a belly to back suplex onto the apron.

They head back outside with Swann loading up the handspring cutter onto the apron but loses momentum and lance on his head instead. Back in and a buckle bomb rocks Swann again, meaning it’s time to work on Swann’s back injury. Various shots to the back, including some rather big knees, keep Swann in trouble. The Kitaro Crusher is avoided though and Swann kicks him in the head. Ax handles to the back are shrugged off and it’s a hurricanrana to drop Omega again.

A super hurricanrana gets one on Omega and he goes up again. This time Swann follows but has to backdrop his way out of a superbomb (with Omega almost landing on his head). The Phoenix splash gives Swann two but Omega is back with the Dr. Willy Bomb. The V Trigger looks to set up the One Winged Angel, with Swann escaping in a hurry. Another V Trigger connects in the corner, followed by another into the snapdragon. Another snapdragon connects but Swann is back up with the handspring cutter.

Swann tries it again but Omega pulls the Impact referee into it instead. Omega grabs a chair, which the AEW referee takes away. Swann hits the handspring cutter into la majistral for one, with Omega reversing into a cradle of his own for two. Another V Trigger misses and a spinning Michinoku Driver gets two on Omega. The Phoenix splash misses and it’s a V Trigger into an electric chair dropped into a German suplex for two more (ok that was cool).

Omega hits a Jay Driller for another near fall so, after some trash talk to Eddie Edwards, it’s another V Trigger. Swann gets fired up and manages a suplex for a breather but the Phoenix splash misses. Another V Trigger sets up the One Winged Angel to give Omega the pin and the title at 22:57.

Rating: B+. It’s a very good match, even with the ending that you knew was coming. Omega was always winning the title so he can do the belt collector deal, though I could have gone with at least trying for a little more drama. This match was built up as “Swann can’t beat Omega so watch Omega win the title” and that’s exactly what happened. They had some good action and tried, but this was all about getting to the ending that you knew was coming. That being said, points for not going too insane with everyone out there, even including the completely unnecessary ref bump.

Overall Rating: B. You had a rather good opener and an even better main event with nothing too horrible in between. This was actually quite the pay per view, as is usual for Impact. I’m really not sure where this goes for them in the future, but for now at least they had a rather good show. Just find the right way forward with Omega and the title and we’ll see what they can do, but they didn’t have a choice with the ending. Rather good show, book ended by a pair of awesome matches.

Results

Josh Alexander b. TJP and Ace Austin – Divine Intervention to Austin

Violent By Design b. Eddie Edwards/Chris Sabin/Willie Mack/James Storm – East River Crossing to Mack

Brian Myers b. Matt Cardona – Roster Cut

Rachael Ellering/Jordynne Grace b. Fire N Flava – Fisherman’s spinebuster to Hogan

Trey Miguel b. Sami Callihan – Callihan could not beat the ten count

FinJuice b. Good Brothers – Small package to Anderson

Deonna Purrazzo b. Tenille Dashwood – Queen’s Gambit

Kenny Omega b. Rich Swann – One Winged Angel

 

 

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Rebellion 2021 Preview

We haven’t been around for one of these in a little while. Impact Wrestling is back with another of its quarterlyish pay per views with Rebellion, and this time it is al about the guest star. The big main event is AEW World Champion Kenny Omega vs. Impact Wrestling World Champion Rich Swann in a title for title match. Impact has done everything it can to make this interesting and it has gone about as well as you would expect. Maybe the rest of the show can make up for it. Let’s get to it.

Tag Team Titles: FinJuice(c) vs. Good Brothers

Let’s get this out of the way to start: FinJuice is not very interesting. They’re talented in the ring, but their characters in Impact boil down to “we’re from New Japan and like wrestling.” Unless I’ve missed something, there isn’t much more to them than that. I understand why it’s a big deal to have the titles defended in New Japan for Impact but it doesn’t do much for the champs. The Good Brothers aren’t much better, but at least they’re around.

Without much drama, the Good Brothers win the titles back here, ending the quick excursion title reign. That way we can have the titles on Dynamite as well as the Good Brothers get to speak in insider terms and hang out with Omega even more while making young boy jokes. It worked so well the first time so why not let them do it again since they’re having so much fun?

Knockouts Tag Team Titles: Fire N Flava(c) vs. Rachael Ellering/Jordynne Grace

The titles go more and more in the same vein as the WWE Women’s Tag Team Titles as we have another thrown together team getting a title shot. Ellering debuted on Impact as a replacement for the retired Jazz so sure let’s have a title match. These titles have not exactly gone well, though Fire N Flava are rather good as the annoying heels who talk WAY too much.

I’ll go with the champs retaining here, just for the sake of not dealing with someone who wasn’t in the promotion three weeks ago becoming a champion. I’m still not sure how necessary these titles are, but there are enough women on the show that it makes some sense. I just wish they would do a better job setting up teams, especially given how many options they have. But yeah, the champs retain here, as they should.

Trey Miguel vs. Sami Callihan

This is Last Man Standing and hopefully this wraps up their feud before they suddenly become best friends who kind of hate each other but work together anyway. It’s a tired trope and you see it enough today all over the place but you know it’s probably coming. They should be able to have a good match though as Miguel can do anything and Callihan is made for this kind of a brawl.

I’ll take Miguel to win here as it would pay off the idea of him having no heart, especially if he can survive a package piledriver or two. Callihan is already a former World Champion so the loss isn’t going to do much damage. Go with what makes sense here, which hopefully means they go in different directions after the match. Miguel is someone with a lot of potential and he doesn’t need to be bogged down with Callihan as his partner.

Matt Cardona vs. Brian Myers

I’m not sure what to think of this one as they have done a decent enough job of keeping this from being Zack Ryder vs. Curt Hawkins, but what we’re getting still isn’t all that great. These two are just kind of there in the ring, though they do their things well enough. I don’t know if I really need to see the match, but this is the logical way to go for both of them.

I think I’ll go with Cardona winning here, as I don’t think Impact is ready for the devastating power of a guy with a running clothesline as a finisher. Cardona is more interesting than Myers, who can stick around as a gatekeeper for the midcard, which is where he fits in best. The match itself should be fine, though I’m scared about how annoying Matt Striker is going to be.

Knockouts Title: Deonna Purrazzo(c) vs. Tenille Dashwood

Dashwood really is one of the weirdest cases in all of Impact, as she should be the top star given all of the potential she has, but for one reason or another it has never clicked. It feels like it has taken forever to get us to her having a big time title match and I’m really not sure if she is actually going to win the title. This could go either way, but what should be a coronation is feeling more like an obligation.

I’ll go with Purrazzo to win here as she seems like someone who could be champion for a very long time to come. There is not much of a reason to put the title on Dashwood here other than “hey maybe we should make Dashwood champion”. Hopefully they figure that out, because Purrazzo is being turned into quite the champion. I don’t know who takes it off of her, but hopefully they have some time before they need to figure it out.

Violent By Design vs. Chris Sabin/Eddie Edwards/James Storm/Willie Mack

I’m curious as to how this one is going to go as Eric Young has a torn ACL. He is capable of having a decent match even on one leg, but I’m not sure if this match has been taped in advance or not. This is a match that has been set up fairly well so hopefully the match goes as good as it could. The match should be a solid one, assuming they don’t do anything nuts, which they should be able to pull off here.

This could go either way, but with Young hurt and going away for a pretty long time, there is little reason to have Violent By Design here. Therefore, I’ll take the motley crew to win here, which makes sense given the situation. Above all else, they could have a way to write off Young here, which could go in a few different directions. Just have a violent match with the right people going over and everything should be fine.

X-Division Title: Ace Austin(c) vs. TJP vs. Josh Alexander

This is the first Impact match in a good while that I have been looking forward to this much. These guys are all talented and capable of coming up with something awesome. They have been feuding over the title for a little over a month now and this is the logical way to go. As long as they are given time and the chance to have a great match, this is all but destined to steal the show.

I’ll go with a hunch here and say Alexander wins. You really could go in any of the three ways to walk out with the title. Madman Fulton can help Austin out a bit but I think someone winds up tapping to Alexander to give him the title for the first time. The good thing about this match is that you really could go with any of them, meaning that if the match is given the chance to shine, we should be in for an awesome match no matter what happens.

Impact Wrestling World Title/AEW World Title: Rich Swann(c) vs. Kenny Omega(c)

And now we have the match that Impact has treated as the biggest match of all time and AEW casually acknowledges if they have nothing else to do because Lost In Space was a rerun this week. This seems to be part of AEW’s grand plan to make Omega the champion of all things, meaning you should be able to see how this one is going. Granted you should have been able to see that from the second Omega showed up in Impact.

Omega could win this match if he showed up to work without his pants, so of course he is walking out with the titles. This is what AEW thinks is some kind of amazing story and if they just have to make Impact look weak to do so, I’m sure Impact will go along with it because that is what they do. The match will be good, but Swann has as much of a chance at winning as I have of being Miss Nevada 1972.

Overall Thoughts

The more I look at this card, the less interested I am in the show. The main event and Tag Team Title match don’t do much for me as the endings are just about obvious. There are interesting parts on the show, but I’m not sure how many of them are going to live up to the hype. Then again, Impact has a great record of having good shows with bad builds, so maybe they can pull it off again here.

 

 

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Impact Wrestling Hardcore Justice 2021: Call It A Wrestlemania Surprise

Hardcore Justice 2021
Date: April 10, 2021
Location: Skyway Studios, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: D’Lo Brown, Matt Striker

It’s the Impact Wrestling Wrestlemania weekend offering with the hardcore themed show, as operated by Tommy Dreamer. Now for once this actually makes sense, though somehow Dreamer is likely to be main eventing the show as well. The card looks decent and has been built up on Impact as of late, so it feels like an actually pay per view. Let’s get to it.

The opening video features Eric Young talking about how he has a sickness and violence is the only cure. Tommy Dreamer has that same sickness and tonight, Young is willing to provide the cure for him.

Ace Austin/Madman Fulton vs. TJP/Fallah Bahh vs. Josh Alexander/Petey Williams

Austin, TJP and Alexander are feuding over the X-Division Title and got to pick their own partners. Alexander gets run over by the huge Bahh to start, including getting knocked to the floor. Back in and Bahh strikes away but Alexander takes him down by the leg. Williams comes in but gets knocked into the corner by TJP. A drop toehold lets Williams hit a dropkick to the back, only to get pulled into TJP’s Octopus variation. It’s off to Austin, who is taken down for a nasty arm crank from TJP.

Bahh comes back in and gets caught in the corner for some shoulders from Fulton. Some double teaming sets up a running crossbody to Bahh’s kneeling back for two but Bahh backdrops his way to freedom. Williams tags himself in to take over on Austin and it’s back to Alexander for a quick German suplex. A blind tag brings Fulton back in to side slam Alexander for two and a big boot lets Austin come back in.

Austin’s spinning legdrop gets two but Alexander pops back up with a powerslam. Austin kicks him into the corner for the hot tag to TJP and the pace picks up. There’s a tornado DDT to Austin and everything breaks down. Bahh crossbodies Fulton down and the Mamba Splash hits Austin but Alexander tags himself in to steal the near fall. Williams Sharpshooters Austin and Alexander ankle locks Fulton but TJP grabs a choke on Williams at the same time.

Bahh breaks the whole thing up and it’s Fulton having to save Austin from the Canadian Destroyer. Everything breaks down again and Fulton cleans house with everyone going down. TJP knocks Alexander into the corner for a facewash and the Canadian Destroyer hits TJP. Williams stomps on Bahh’s ankle and Alexander ankle locks him for the tap at 13:41.

Rating: B-. This was exactly what it should have been with a hot opener featuring some talented people. The Canadian Destroyer may have become one of the biggest jokes in wrestling but there is still a little something special about Williams using it. This was all about the main trio though and they could tear the house down at Rebellion. Good stuff here and they’re off to a solid start.

Here’s what’s coming today.

Hernandez vs. Shera

This is a chairs match dubbed Chairly Legal. Dang it why do I have to love puns? The exchange of shoulders goes to Shera and he hammers away in the corner. Hernandez gets in a shot of his own though and the first chair shot goes over Shera’s back. Some chairs are set up at ringside but Hernandez spends too much time on the building, allowing Shera to chair him down. Back in and Hernandez gets in a chair shot of his own and wedges some chairs in the corner.

Shera goes face first into a chair in the middle of the ring for two and the big ax handles keep him down. A quick spinebuster gives Shera two and they head outside with Hernandez taking over again. Some chairs are thrown in and Shera manages to superplex him onto the pile for two. Hernandez is right back up with chair shots of his own but here is Rohit Raju to blast Hernandez with a chair. A confused Shera gets the pin at 9:01.

Rating: C. Another not too bad match here with Shera getting a lot better, mainly due to not having everything focused on some stupid dance. The chairs were the focal point here and they didn’t go outside of that, which made enough sense for a one off match like this. Hernandez is fine in this role and that is all he needs to be. Not a great match but it fit in well on a show like this one.

We go to Swinger’s Palace where Chris Sabin and James Storm aren’t happy with being told to take the night off. XXXL comes in and can’t get a seat so a match is set up for…well actually one isn’t because XXXL gets to sit down. Matt Cardona comes in to ask what the deal is around here. He says Swinger has been in wrestling for 150 years so here is Dreamer to it’s MATCH TIME. This isn’t Wrestle House….but Dreamer is in charge so we’re having Cardona vs. Swinger in a Crate American Bash.

Doc Gallows vs. Black Taurus

Karl Anderson and Crazzy Steve are here too. Taurus hammers away to start but misses a crossbody, allowing Gallows to hit a clothesline to take over. Gallows knocks him down again and hammers away, including an uppercut to cut off a comeback attempt. A suplex sets up a chinlock for a bit before a trip to the floor.

Taurus is sent over the barricade and we head back inside for another chinlock. With that broken up, Gallows hits a bit boot but Taurus fights up with a shot to the ace. A top rope clothesline sets up a 619 into a missile dropkick for two on Gallows. Anderson offers a distraction though and it’s a superkick into a chokebomb to finish Taurus at 9:01.

Rating: D+. This was mostly a squash until Taurus had a nice comeback. I like Taurus a good bit but there is no way he should be beating Gallows here. That being said, there is only so much that can be done when Gallows isn’t exactly giving him much throughout the match. The Brothers are not exactly my favorite people in Impact and this didn’t do much to change that idea.

Violent By Design is ready to cure Tommy Dreamer and company.

Matt Cardona vs. Johnny Swinger

Crate American Bash, meaning there is a crate at every corner with something inside to use. Swinger, with the Swingerellas, gets rolled up to start and lies about the tights being pulled. Back up and Swinger hits a strut but needs to hide in the ropes, allowing Cardona to do his own strut, which will always work. Some forearms to the back set up a Paul Orndorff elbow on Cardona and it’s time to grab the first crate. Inside….is a framed photo of Scott Hall, which is a call back to the WCW version of this match because reasons.

Swinger knocks him off the apron and into the barricade for a breather. Back in and Swinger goes for the second crate but Cardona takes him down with a jawbreaker. Swinger pulls him off the ropes though and opens the second crate to find…a rat trap. Ok that was funny. Cardona gets his knees up in the corner and adds the middle rope dropkick.

Back up and a collision gives us another double knockdown but Cardona is up first. The third crate has….something Cardona likes but he doesn’t pull it out. Swinger gets the other crate and finds some brass knuckles for a big smile. That’s about it for the smiling though as he charges into Radio Silence for the pin at 7:53.

Rating: C-. Total comedy match here and there is nothing wrong with that. Swinger is someone who has gone from a complete groan to one of the more entertaining things about Impact Wrestling, which has been a great surprise. I’m guessing the third crate has some kind of toy or action figure inside, which would be appropriate for the match, though it does make me wonder why Dreamer had these things sitting around. Anyway, this was fine.

Cardona takes the third crate with him.

Flashback Moment of the Week: Rob Van Dam vs. Sabu at Hardcore Justice 2010. You need this on a taped pay per view? This eats up nearly ten minutes.

XXXL is having trouble keeping up with James Storm and Chris Sabin’s drinking.

Here is Sami Callihan to say he tries to help people, including Trey Miguel. It worked last week and under his mentoring, Miguel could reach the next level. Passion is about taking what you want and since Sami wants to be on Hardcore Justice, he is going to be on Hardcore Justice. The open challenge is on.

Sami Callihan vs. Sam Beale

Beale is Miguel’s student and Sami runs him over to start. Sami offers him a free shot and then knocks Beale down again. Beale’s face is rubbed into the mat and Sami bites him a bit before taking it outside. Some right hands have little effect on Sami, who snaps off a t-bone suplex to drop Beale again. Back in and Beale rolls him up for two so Sami nails a hard clothesline. The package piledriver finishes Beale at 4:05.

Rating: D+. This was a storyline advancement rather than a match and while I’m not a fan of the angle, it’s not like they spent a lot of time on it. Sami messing with Trey is either going to result in a big match at Rebellion or them being the Tag Team Champions. Neither is overly appealing but PLEASE DON’T MAKE THEM A REGULAR TEAM! Just let them fight and be done with it already.

We recap Brian Myers damaging Matt Cardona’s eye Jake Something’s eye. Therefore, it’s a hardcore blindfold match.

Brian Myers vs. Jake Something

Striker: “Look up the last time someone named Jake was in a blindfold match.” Good grief. They’re both blindfolded and there are weapons at ringside. Myers gets knocked outside early on and finds a trashcan lid to take Something down. In a smart move, Myers grabs him by the wrist and then finds another weapon to hit him in the head. They head back inside with Myers dropping him again and covering, albeit with Jake on his stomach.

Back up and Jake manages a sitout powerbomb, followed by some Scott Hall style shoulders while holding Myers’ wrist. Myers manages to find the referee and send him into Jake. The knockdown allows Myers to pull up the mask and hit a low superkick, which draws out Cardona with the third crate. Cardona slaps the mat for a distraction and slides Jake the crate. A shot to the head knocks Myers out and opens the crate, revealing a bunch of action figures. Jake hits a Boss Man Slam for the pin at 5:14.

Rating: D+. Another match that wasn’t supposed to be anything more than a fun idea that advanced a bigger story. In that regard it worked out well and it isn’t like this is going to be anything more than that. Cardona vs. Myers is slowly growing on me and as long as it doesn’t get treated as anything overly serious, it should work out well. Now give Jake a new last name and everything gets better.

Tommy Dreamer and his team (Rich Swann/Willie Mack/Eddie Edwards) are ready for Violent By Design.

Rosemary vs. Alisha vs. Havok vs. Jordynne Grace vs. Susan vs. Tenille Dashwood

Weapons match and the winner gets a Knockouts Title shot at Rebellion. Actually hold on as Su Yung comes out to attack Susan and we have a replacement. Yung is too much for Dashwood, who runs off rather than deal with her. Grace hammers on Alisha in the corner while Rosemary and Havok knock Young outside. That team lasts all of three seconds before they knock each other to the floor. Dashwood grabs Grace’s leg so the chase is on, meaning Kaleb With A K almost hits Dashwood with a frying pan by mistake.

It’s time for the staple gun and Kaleb With A K takes the shot to save Dashwood. That leaves Havok to legdrop Alisha for two with Grace making the save. The big staredown goes to Grace, who cuts off Alisha’s try with a trashcan. Grace plants Alisha for two with Yung making the save this time as you can see Susan being taken to the back (only took the referees the better part of ten minutes to help her). Yung beats on Grace until Havok comes in with a noose to take her down. Rosemary gets the Upside Down on Grace and it’s time for little red bag of thumbtacks.

Alisha hits something like a reverse DDT to drive Rosemary into them before whipping out a kendo stick (which is dubbed Kendra). Yung gives Alisha the Mandible Claw to cut that off and drag her away, which can’t end well. Havok and Grace slug it out with Havok knocking her down (allowing Striker to get in the always wrong “they’re all the same height on the mat”) and going up. Cue Nevaeh to throw powder in Havok’s eyes though and Kaleb With A K adds a superkick. Grace is back up with a Vader Bomb to Havok but Dashwood comes in and steals the pin at 9:43.

Rating: C-. This started to drag a bit in the middle but Dashwood winning actually surprised me. It is nice to see her FINALLY moving up as she has every tool imaginable but for some reason nothing has clicked yet. The weapons were a pretty minor part here but hopefully this leads to Yung returning full time. Susan isn’t working so give us what works better for a change. Not much of a match, but the right person won.

XXXL is very drunk but still want their match. James Storm says it’s time…..to play beer pong apparently. Chris Sabin throws the ball at the cup and knocks it off the table, so Larry D. offers to show him how it’s done. This misses completely, with Swinger dubbing him Knuckleball Schwartz. Storm throws a ball at Larry and the fight is on with Storm and Sabin standing tall, allowing Storm to drop a ball in the cup for the win. Swinger panics because he forgot to pay for his insurance.

Deonna Purrazzo talks about how important Jazz is but her time has passed. Tonight Purrazzo will prove that and it is title vs. career.

Knockouts Title: Deonna Purrazzo vs. Jazz

Jazz is challenging with her career on the line. An early spinwheel kick gives Jazz two and she starts in on the arm. That’s fine with Purrazzo, who catches her with an arm snap across the top rope. The armbar is on but Jazz gets in an elbow to the face, only to get pulled into a Downward Spiral for two. Purrazzo stays on the arm and ties Jazz’s limbs around the bottom rope for a change of pace. Some kicks put Jazz on the floor so she has to pull herself back in, allowing Purrazzo to stomp away some more.

They head outside with Purrazzo hammering away until Jazz runs her over. It’s time to throw in some weapons and they head inside again, with Jazz nailing the snap jabs. An X Factor gets two but Purrazzo goes after the arm again to take over. The title is brought in but Purrazzo pulls it away and chairs her down. A DDT onto the chair gives Jazz two and frustration is setting in. Jazz can’t get a double chickenwing so Purrazzo snaps off an exploder suplex. The Queen’s Gambit retains the title at 13:08.

Rating: C+. They were going for the big, emotional moment here and came pretty close to nailing it. Jazz might not be the biggest legend of all time but she has wrestled everywhere and done pretty well for a long time, so it is more than ok to give her something like this. Solid enough match too, making this feel like a good co-main event.

Post match Purrazzo leaves and Jazz gets the big sendoff, with Jordynne Grace coming in to thank her. This would be a lot better if Striker would shut up about Mama calling on the Louisiana wind and her children always waiting. Just….stop talking sometimes man.

Tommy Dreamer has been attacked so the main event will be 4-3.

Eddie Edwards/Willie Mack/Rich Swann vs. Violent By Design

This a Hardcore War, meaning WarGames (minus the cage) with two men starting for three minutes and the team who won a coin toss (Violent By Design) sending in another man after two minutes. Two minutes later, the other team evens things up. Once all eight are in, it is the first fall to win with No DQ of course. Eddie Edwards and Deaner start things off on the floor as Striker wants Dreamer to come out in the Willis Reed or Kirk Gibson moment.

They knock each other around on the floor before heading inside, where Eddie hits a belly to belly suplex. That sends them back outside…and then get back in, with Eddie hammering away to take over. The Backpack Stunner connects as time expires, with Striker, who read the rules earlier, not being sure who has the advantage. Rhino is in to make it 2-1 and the slow beating is on. Brown talks about how Rhino has changed, to the point where Rhino won’t even speak to him.

As I try to imagine Brown and Rhino as a team with Rhino doing the head shake, Willie Mack, with Kenny and a chain (which Striker thinks sounds like a country song) comes in to even things up. The good guys take over with various weapons shots, including a toaster (Brown: “I love French toast.”) until Joe Doering comes in to make it 3-2.

Edwards and Mack jump the monster but he knocks both of them down at once without much trouble. Deaner puts Mack’s hand in the toaster and bends it back until Rich Swann is in to even it up. Swann cleans house, including kicking Doering low, with a handicap parking sign. With Violent By Design down, Swann and Edwards set up a table at ringside as Eric Young comes in to complete the villains.

Young brings in a hockey stick to beat on people in various painful ways until the countdown is on and…..Trey Miguel evens things up with a golf club. Miguel gets in Doering’s face and gets crushed with a crossbody, which has Striker loudly thanking God for Doering. Deaner beats on Mack but gets caught with Swann’s handspring cutter. Rhino Gores Swann through a table in the corner for two, meaning it’s time to go to the corner.

The Tower of Doom plants everyone but Doering, who puts Eddie on a table outside. Miguel gets up with a top rope Meteora to drive Doering through Eddie through the table though, leaving Mack 3-1 inside. Rhino is sent outside and a pop up Downward Spiral gets two on Doering with Young making the save. Young is back up with the piledriver to finish Mack at 20:25.

Rating: C+. This was pretty good but felt a bit like the hold house show versions of WarGames in the NWA days. Yeah it’s a big, violent match but don’t expect anything taken to the next level. Miguel coming in to replace Dreamer was a surprise and Dreamer not getting the spotlight was nice. They did well enough for a main event here, but it’s no classic, at least partially due to Striker’s odd obsession with Doering.

Overall Rating: C. I’m not sure how much more you were expecting from a hardcore themed show over Wrestlemania weekend. It advanced some stories and gave us a few good moments with some talented wrestlers. For $10, that’s about all you can ask for and it worked out as well as could be expected. Nothing worth seeing on here, but if you throw it on, you won’t have the worst time.

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – March 23, 2021: Everyone Else But Him

Impact Wrestling
Date: March 23, 2021
Location: Skyway Studios, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: D’Lo Brown, Matt Striker

We are on the road to Rebellion and that means it is time to start hammering home some of the card. This time around it is going to include an appearance from Kenny Omega and that means things are about to be dropped to focus on him. That makes sense given that he is the biggest star on the show, but it doesn’t do much for anyone around here once he leaves. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Don Callis leads Kenny Omega into the building.

Opening recap.

Deonna Purrazzo vs. Jazz

Non-title with Susan and Jordynne Grace here as well. They go to the mat to start with Jazz switching into a hammerlock. Back up and Jazz hits some snap jabs but a drop toehold puts her into the ropes. Susan gets in some choking and Purrazzo’s clothesline gets two. We hit the chinlock with a knee in Jazz’s back but she jawbreaks her way to freedom. Purrazzo misses a charge into the post, setting up Jazz’s spinning kick to the head for two. A facebuster gives Jazz two, mainly due to Susan putting the foot on the rope. Jazz goes for Susan and gets a shoe upside the head, allowing Purrazzo to get the pin at 6:24.

Rating: C-. Just a match here and odds are the ending sets up a rematch for Hardcore Justice, which may or may not be the best idea. Above all else, Purrazzo could use some fresh competition and Jazz will do fine as a short term challenger. I’m not sure what they are going to do at Rebellion, but at least Jazz should keep them covered for the time being.

The Good Brothers are telling stories to some of the locker room when Eddie Edwards comes in to mock them for suddenly being willing to change with the boys now that they have lost their titles. The Brothers leave and run into Decay, who mock them as well.

Johnny Swinger, a 26 year old male, gives us a commercial for Swinger’s Palace. Alisha Edwards (with an unlit cigarette and a graphic saying she has a problem) talks about how the cards keep moving around here. Lenny Powers, an out of work security guard, has shown his brother he isn’t the black sheep. Completely non disgruntled employee John E. Bravo is glad to be the dealer here. Come try your luck! This was funny.

Rohit Raju runs into Fallah Bahh, who has hit a rough patch and is sleeping in the studio. Raju yells at him and tells him to get it together. Violence is teased.

Here’s what’s coming tonight.

X-Division Title: TJP vs. Ace Austin

Austin, with Madman Fulton, is defending. They go to the exchange of holds to start, which shockingly enough goes to TJP. Austin manages to take him to the mat but TJP kicks him away without much effort. Back up and TJP dropkicks him into the corner, only to have Austin springboard out with a spinning kick to the head.

TJP gets dropped onto the apron and they head up top, with TJP being dropped down hard with a super gordbuster. We take a break and come back with Austin working on a half crab. That’s switched into a double chickenwing to keep TJP in trouble but he manages to reverse into an abdominal stretch. Austin breaks it up so TJP kicks him down, only to get kicked in the face.

Austin’s top rope Fameasser gets two but he misses a charge and gets caught in something like the Octopus in the ropes. That’s broken up so TJP misses the Mamba splash. A double clothesline puts both of them down for a bit, allowing Austin to try the Fold. TJP counters that into the Detonation kick into the Mamba splash but Fulton comes in for the DQ at 13:20.

Rating: C+. This was good while it lasted but you could see the ending coming from the second Fulton came through the curtain. That’s not a bad thing either, as the monster saving the champ who gets in trouble is as simple and effective of a booking trope as you can find. If nothing else, it makes the big title change down the line feel more important.

Josh Alexander runs in for the save.

We get a sitdown interview with Matt Cardona, who is ready to open all of the presents he sees around here. Cardona talks about how social media has meant a lot to his career, which brings him to Brian Myers accusing him of riding his coattails and following him to Impact. That isn’t the case, because Cardona is here for competition. If Myers wants a match, come get it, and then they’re done.

Trey Miguel runs into XXXL and a fight is teased but Tommy Dreamer pops up to say they can have an exploding ring barbed wire deathmatch at Hardcore Justice. XXXL leaves and Miguel wants to fight Romero tonight. Dreamer talks about what happens when someone gets in your head and warns Miguel not to go there.

Rohit Raju vs. Fallah Bahh

Bahh wastes no time in hitting a belly to belly but misses a crossbody. Raju hammers away but Bahh shrugs it off and hits a twisting slam. The Banzai Drop is up and Raju’s double stomp gets two. Bahh charges into the running knee but doesn’t go down. That leaves Raju to try a sunset flip but he has to avoid the sitdown splash, meaning it’s a crucifix with tights to finish Bahh at 3:49.

Rating: D+. Another match that didn’t have time to go anywhere but you could only expect to much out of this. Bahh has come a long way and him being the poor gambling addict is more of a character than he has had before, though I’m not sure how far he can go. Raju continues to be one of the bigger surprises in Impact as he has gone from nothing to a completely watchable star.

Kenny Omega and Don Callis say they will do their talking in the ring.

We get the Tony Schiavone/Tony Khan Dynamite preview, this time featuring Don Callis and Kenny Omega. We run down the card and Omega is not worried about facing Matt Sydal because there is a 0% chance of him earning a title shot.

The Good Brothers can’t get in to see Kenny Omega and aren’t happy about it. The idea that he’s not in his dressing room doesn’t seem to occur to them.

Here are Kenny Omega and Don Callis for a chat. Omega says this is his land and Callis promises that Omega will have the title sooner rather than later. Callis talks about his chat with Rich Swann last week. Swann can have anything he wants and all the success he wants, but he can’t get the One Winged Angel out of his head. We hear about how Omega is the greatest wrestler of all time and Callis is ready to suck all of the talent out of this company if it helps Omega.

Callis has prepared a tribute to the One Winged Angel and Omega talks about how scared everyone is to be around him. The day he arrived in Impact was the greatest day in the history of Impact, but it was Tuesday to Omega. There is no one here who can beat him and until he falls on a banana peel, no one is taking this title from him. They promise to destroy everyone here, including Rich Swann.

Eric Young talks about showing Rhino the truth and the monster inside of him.

Fire N Flava talk trash to Havok and Nevaeh. A match is set, but it’s non-title because the champs want them to earn something. Fire N Flava leave so here are Kaleb With A K and Tenille Dashwood to offer another alliance with Nevaeh. Again, it doesn’t go anywhere.

Acey Romero vs. Trey Miguel

Miguel starts fast but gets knocked out of the corner with a big forearm. After a quick trip to the floor, Miguel charges into a side slam and we take a break. Back with Romero hitting a splash for two and we hit the double arm crank. Miguel fights up with some forearms and a spinning kick to the head gets two. Another springboard is Pounced out of the air to give Romero two but Miguel gets smart by kicking the knee out. A springboard cutter sets up the top rope Meteora for the pin at 8:20.

Rating: C-. Another not so great match here but it worked out well enough. Miguel getting a win is a good thing after last week’s war against Sami Callihan. I’m not sure where Miguel goes from here, but as long as it isn’t another stupid version of “they hate each other and now they’re partners”, I think he’ll be fine.

Post match the beatdown is on but Sami Callihan makes the save. OH COME ON WITH HIS STUPID IDEA AGAIN.

Rich Swann isn’t sweating the One Winged Angel because every time he and Omega have been one on one, Swann has gotten the better of it. So it’s Omega who needs to be ready.

James Storm is ready for his 1000th match around here and he’s ready to face Eric Young in #1000. Scott D’Amore comes in to make the match next week’s main event.

Here’s what’s coming next week.

Eddie Edwards vs. Karl Anderson

Feeling out process to start but Eddie picks up the pace with an overhead belly to belly. A clothesline over the top puts Anderson on the floor and there’s the suicide dive. We take a break and come back with a Doc Gallows distraction letting Anderson shove Eddie off the top and out to the floor. That’s enough for the referee, who makes Gallows…..sit in a chair.

Back in and Anderson cranks on the arm and neck for a bit before whipping Edwards hard into the corner. Commentary talks about the One Winged Angel some more but starts paying attention more during a chinlock. Eddie finally fights up and manages a release gordbuster. The Backpack Stunner gets two and the Blue Thunder Bomb is good for the same. The Gun Stun is broken up so Eddie tries an O’Connor roll, only to have the kickout send him into Gallows’ chair. Anderson hits a spinebuster for the pin at 13:48.

Rating: C+. I know the Good Brothers can be over the top with a lot of their antics but they can wrestle a pretty decent match when they are given the chance. Granted in this case it helps having Eddie Edwards in there because he can wrestle with anyone. Not a great match, but it was perfectly serviceable for a main event.

Post match FinJuice pops up to talk about how they have won all over Japan and talk about various young boy things, because this feud is still about Japan.

Overall Rating: C-. Omega’s promo was the highlight, and that is kind of the problem around here. I do get completely sick of Impact acting like Omega/FinJuice/anyone from any other promotion is like some kind of gift from Heaven but Omega really is a lot better than almost anyone here. Now if they could use that as a way to boost up Impact rather than Omega, we might be onto something. The wrestling and stories were mostly just ok, but this show was all about Omega. As usual.

Results

Deonna Purrazzo b. Jazz – Rollup after a shoe shot from Susan

TJP b. Ace Austin via DQ when Madman Fulton interfered

Rohit Raju b. Fallah Bahh – Crucifix with tights

Trey Miguel b. Acey Romero – Top rope Meteora

Karl Anderson b. Eddie Edwards – Spinebuster

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – March 16, 2021: The Side Show

Impact Wrestling
Date: March 16, 2021
Location: Skyway Studios, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: D’Lo Brown, Matt Striker

We’re done with Sacrifice and that means it is time to start getting ready for the next major pay per view with Rebellion. Rich Swann is now the sole World Champion and gets to move on to face Kenny Omega at the pay per view. By face I mean be sacrificed to, as AEW begins its march to taking over every other promotion not named WWE because….I’m not sure why that’s what we’re doing but it seems likely. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

FinJuice vs. XXXL

Non-title as FinJuice won the Tag Team Titles at Sacrifice. Larry D. drives Robinson into the corner with the straight power but Robinson is back with a dropkick. Finlay comes in off the top with an elbow to the arm but Acey Romero shrugs off a double bulldog attempt. A running crossbody to Robinson’s back crushes him again but everything breaks down in a hurry. Acey gets double dropkicked out to the floor and the Acid Drop finishes Larry at 3:32.

Rating: C-. That’s all this should have been as the new champs shouldn’t have a problem against a team like XXXL. FinJuice works well together and that kind of chemistry is always going to work. It was fun to see them pick apart the monsters because that is something that can be done for quite a while without losing its appeal.

Post match here are the Good Brothers with Anderson blaming Gallows for the loss. Gallows: “You got pinned.” Anderson: “Beside the point.” They have been busy lately so the loss really wasn’t fair. The champs are willing to give them a rematch, but they’ll have to wait until a Japan trip is over. Ok young boys (Japan reference!)? The brawl is on and FinJuice bail in a hurry.

Here’s what’s coming tonight.

Sami Callihan is here to expose Trey Miguel’s lack of passion. Miguel thinks anger is the same thing as passion and it was on display last week when he beat up his student Sam Beale. Tonight, Sami is going to embarrass Miguel over his lack of passion.

The Good Brothers complain about FinJuice taking the titles back to Japan without them but Scott D’Amore gives them their rematch at Rebellion.

The Good Brothers leave and Tommy Dreamer comes in to say that not having Tag Team Titles is a problem. D’Amore goes on a rant about how we can’t just team up with Paul E. and run a company into the ground. Hardcore Justice is next month so Dreamer can book it himself. Dreamer has actually already done that so D’Amore says Dreamer is in charge that night. Great, but at least it makes a bit of sense this time. I’m going to hope that Hardcore Justice is a requirement because having that show the same month as Rebellion seems a bit nuts.

Rhino vs. Jake Something

Violent By Design, Chris Sabin and James Storm are all here too. They slug it out to start with Rhino getting the better of things and slamming Jake down by the hair. The people on the floor get in a brawl and Rhino uses the distraction to hit the Gore for the pin at 2:08.

Post match Violent By Design beats Something/Storm/Sabin down.

Tenille Dashwood and Kaleb With A K fire up their team for a 12 woman Knockouts match later. Most of the rest of the team thinks they should be in charge instead and a lot of bickering ensues.

Rohit Raju vs. Mahabali Shera

Raju knocks him into the corner to start and hammers away, only to get rocked by straight power. A shot to the leg takes Shera down and Raju rakes the eyes before starting in on the arm. That just makes Shera mad but he gets kicked in the face. A jumping knee to the head sets up a Cannonball in the corner but Shera is right back with a chokebreaker. Shera misses a charge into the post though and Raju grabs a rollup with feet on the ropes for the pin at 4:05.

Rating: D+. I’m sorry what now? Impact has been building Shera up as this unstoppable monster for weeks now and then he loses to Raju in four minutes? After being beaten down for most of the match? I have no idea what they were going for here but I was much more confused than anything else. Raju has come a LONG way in the last few months, but what was the point in having him almost squash Shera?

Willie Mack comes up to Rich Swann and congratulates him for his win. They need to celebrate this but Swann has something to do first.

Here’s Rich Swann for a chat, carrying both belts. He can’t hold these titles up because the gold is weighing him down. Last Saturday, he and Moose worked hard and Swann was the one on the higher horse. Now he is a double World Champion and that is unthinkable. Swann has partied every day since then but now he has to get serious about the monkey on his back that is Kenny Omega. Now it all comes back around on April 24 as he gets a chance to make up for January. It’s one on one at Rebellion and we will see who the real World Champion really is.

Cue Don Callis to hug Swann and say something to him that we can’t hear. Callis talks about how much he loves history and wants Swann to stop him if he says anything untrue. He has been a Swann guy for a long time now and has fought for him for years. Callis was the one wanted him to have a chance and made sure he was paid every two weeks while he was recovering from a broken leg. Swann nods to acknowledge that this is all true, including that Callis fought for him to get into the Bound For Glory main event.

Swann was the shiny toy but now Callis has moved on to someone else in Kenny Omega. Sure Swann had a great moment at Sacrifice, but maybe he can’t stop thinking about that One Winged Angel at Hard To Kill. Swann is a once in a decade talent, but Omega is a god of professional wrestling. Callis has been there for all of Omega’s greatest moments and he’ll be there shouting ONE WINGED ANGEL on commentary at Rebellion when Omega walks out with both titles. This was great stuff from Callis and he played the mastermind well.

It’s time for Tony Schiavone/Tony Khan to give their weekly Dynamite plug. We run down the card, with Forbidden Door being mentioned three times in the first thirty seconds. There wasn’t much in the way of funny this time.

Eddie Edwards and Matt Cardona are glad to have each others’ backs when Brian Myers comes in. Edwards leaves and Myers says he doesn’t want Cardona here for once. Cardona doesn’t seem phased.

Tenille Dashwood/Fire N Flava/Kimber Lee/Deonna Purrazzo/Susan vs. Jazz/ODB/Jordynne Grace/Havok/Nevaeh/Alisha

Kaleb With A K is here with Dashwood and company. Alisha goes after Dashwood to start but gets dropped with a forearm. Dashwood misses a charge into the corner though and it’s a running hip attack to keep her down. ODB hits the Bronco Buster and it’s off to Susan, who gets caught in the wrong corner by Nevaeh.

Therefore Kimber comes in instead and gets double teamed down by Havok and Nevaeh for an early two. Havok throws Kiera into the corner and we get a Jazz vs. Purrazzo showdown. Everything breaks down in a hurry for the parade of shots to the face until Steelz and Grace slug it out. The two of them hit the big dives and we take a break.

Back with Purrazzo clotheslining Alisha for two but Susan gets dropped with a clothesline. The hot tag brings in Grace to start cleaning house, including a powerslam for a pair of twos on Lee. Everything breaks down again for the parade of secondary finishers until we’re down to Jazz vs. Lee. An STF misses and Jazz pulls her into the STF for the tap at 13:07.

Rating: C. You’re only going to be able to get so much out of twelve people in there at once. It was fine enough while it lasted and Jazz does get a rub out of the pin (Jazz vs. Deonna for the title could work well as an Impact Plus showdown), but nothing really got a chance to shine with so many people in there at the same time.

Ace Austin is rather happy with his win at Sacrifice, even if he told us so. Chris Bey comes in to bring up beating Austin last week, but here is Josh Alexander to say he won at No Surrender. Ace isn’t pleased but here’s TJP, who gets his rematch for the title next week.

Here’s what’s coming next week.

Sami Callihan vs. Trey Miguel

Trey slugs away to start fast but Sami runs him over with a clothesline. They fight to the floor in a hurry and then up to the stage, where Miguel slips out of a powerbomb attempt. Sami gets in a Boston crab on the floor as we take a break. Back with Sami kicking away and sending him outside in another heap. Miguel’s leg is tied around the post and kicked hard, followed by the Junkyard Dog headbutts back inside.

The leg cranking is on but Miguel kicks him away for the breather. Sami goes up top, where he counters a super hurricanrana into a Boston crab while still on the middle rope. That’s broken up so Trey tries a springboard, only to have his leg give out. Trey is fine enough to knock him down for a double stomp and we take another break.

Back with again the chop off until Trey uses the good leg for a Codebreaker. Miguel tries another top rope double stomp and bangs up the knee again, allowing Sami to hit another clothesline. A grab of the leg is broken up by Sami biting Miguel and an STF has Trey in more trouble. Make the a Crossface with Miguel in even more trouble until a rope is grabbed.

Sami chops him up against the barricade but Miguel manages to run the steps for a springboard cutter onto the floor. Back in and Trey gets two off a neckbreaker, with the kickout having Miguel a little screwed up. Trey goes up but the referee gets in the way to check on Callihan, allowing Sami to crotch Trey on top. The package piledriver finishes Miguel at 23:52.

Rating: B. This worked out well with both guys beating on each other for a long time until the screwy finish. I’m not sure where this is going but as long as it doesn’t end up with the two of them as wacky tag team partners, everything should wind up working out. Miguel was working hard here and Sami was a great villain, making this a heck of a match.

Overall Rating: C. Not too bad here but the stories continue to not be the most thrilling in the world. Above all else, it feels like we’re just waiting around while the World Title is kept warm for Kenny Omega, who will….probably not be around here very often. At the same time, you have New Japan holding the Tag Team Titles because we need to show how awesome it is when other companies are here. This leaves Impact with part time World and Tag Team Champions (or probably just one once we get done with Rebellion where the Good Brothers get the titles back) because….uh, guest stars! Not an awful show, but not inspiring.

Results

FinJuice b. XXXL – Acid drop to Larry D.

Rhino b. Jake Something – Gore

Rohit Raju b. Mahabali Shera – Rollup with feet on the ropes

ODB/Jazz/Nevaeh/Havok/Alisha/Jordynne Grace b. Fire N Flava/Kimber Lee/Susan/Deonna Purrazzo/Kimber Lee – STF to Lee

Sami Callihan b. Trey Miguel – Package piledriver

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – March 2, 2021: They Need The Big Stars

Impact Wrestling
Date: March 2, 2021
Location: Skyway Studios, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: D’Lo Brown, Matt Striker

We are most of the way to Sacrifice and now we have a main event as Moose will challenge Rich Swann for the World Title. That would be the Impact World Title, as the TNA World Title now seems to be the official secondary title (at least for now) around here. That should be a heck of a match when they get the chance so hopefully the rest of the card looks as good. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

Black Taurus vs. Ace Austin vs. Chris Bey

The rest of Decay and Madman Fulton are here and the winner gets the X-Division Title shot against TJP at Sacrifice. Taurus gets jumped to start with both fellow villains standing on his chest in the corner. Some running dropkicks keep Taurus down but he pops up and tosses Bey into Austin into another corner. Back up and Bey offers a distraction, allowing Austin to hit a springboard kick to the head.

That’s enough to send Taurus outside for the stereo dives, meaning it’s Austin vs. Bey grappling away back inside. Austin flips out of a headscissors, followed by Bey doing the same. They both catch kicks at the same time so Bey heads to the apron, where Taurus pulls him down. Taurus catches Austin’s dive and slams him onto Bey on the floor to take over. Back in and Taurus strikes away, including a running elbow for two. Bey sends Austin to the floor and kicks Taurus in the head in the corner.

Taurus loads up a suplex on Bey but Austin is back in with a springboard dropkick to put all three down. I’m not sure why Taurus is down as the dropkick hit Bey, but I guess it makes for a better visual. Taurus Pounces Austin to break up the Fold and a heck of a pop up Samoan drop plants Bey. Austin catches Taurus’ charge though and sends him to the floor, where Taurus is holding his knee. Back up and Fulton grabs Bey, leaving Austin to hit the Fold for the pin at 8:07.

Rating: C+. Austin was the right choice to win here as he is on a roll but this was a good performance from everyone. The X-Division has suddenly gotten pretty sweet again and I could go for seeing more of these people doing their thing. Austin vs. TJP should be a heck of a match and Taurus looked like a heck of a monster here.

Jordynne Grace and Jazz are ready for Deonna Purrazzo and company but here are Fire N Flava to mock their losses. They will be at ringside tonight but Grace says let’s just make it a triple threat.

Brian Myers tries to talk to Matt Cardona, who is refereeing his match tonight. Cardona is calling it straight tonight though because he wants to keep it professional.

Commentary runs down the card.

Tenille Dashwood vs. Havok

Kaleb With A K (still in the neck brace) is here with Dashwood. A shot to the back of the head just annoys Havok, who backs her into the corner as a result. Dashwood’s crawl through the legs is caught so she elbows Havok in the head. The Russian legsweep is easily blocked though and Dashwood is sent to the apron. Havok misses a charge and gets kicked in the face, setting up a neckbreaker over the middle rope.

We take a break and come back with Havok caught in the Tarantula to keep her in trouble. The Taste of Tenille gets two and she sends Havok face first into the mat for two more. Dashwood grabs a full nelson but Havok throws her down and gets a boot up in the corner. A backbreaker into a clothesline gives Havok two and there’s a kick to the head to put Dashwood down again. Kaleb gets up to offer a distraction though and the Spotlight Kick (with Havok leaning over for a long time) finishes Havok at 7:49.

Rating: C-. It’s more of the same from Dashwood, as she still lacks that spark. She continues to go from one random match to another with little in between them. That was the case again here, meaning Dashwood was fine but it was far from interesting. I’m not sure if this is supposed to lead to Havok vs. Nevaeh, but is that really something that is supposed to be exciting?

Post match here’s Nevaeh to beat down Dashwood and Kaleb With A K.

Sami Callihan seems to be in Trey Miguel’s trophy room and says Miguel has no passion. He goes into an office and shoves over I guess Trey’s business partner. Now it’s time to go into Trey’s wrestling school and beat up a bunch of people. One of the students gets in his face but Sami doesn’t want to hear it and beats the student down as well. Another wrestler runs in and Sami backs off before offering to be his teacher instead. Sami tells the camera that the kid is in good hands.

It’s off to Swinger’s Palace, where TJP wants to know the odds on his match with Ace Austin. Cue Madman Fulton and Ace Austin, with TJP winning some bets on Austin asking various questions. Chris Bey comes in and gets in Ace’s face, but Johnny Swinger says no fighting until he gets odds on it. TJP wins a bunch of money off of that too.

Flashback Moment of the Week: Sting b. Rob Van Dam at Sacrifice 2011 to retain the World Title.

Eric Young scolds Deaner for losing to Jake Something last week and Joe Doering punishes him with violence. Young is only doing this because he cares. Deaner: “I know.”

It’s time for the Tony Schiavone/Khan announcement of the week, as they promote Dynamite and Revolution. Khan talks about how it is every promotion against THEM, though he won’t say who THEM is (because he can’t say WWE). Now he is the leader and we get multiple Forbidden Door mentions. More Dynamite plugs wrap us up, with Khan shouting a lot. Then Schiavone goes over a lot of the same material again in a quieter manner. This one felt a lot longer than the rest.

Video on Moose, who is now officially a World Champion. He knew he would always get here and now it is time for Rich Swann to be destroyed by Mr. Impact.

Good Brothers/FinJuice vs. XXXL/Reno Scum

Finlay and Luster trade headlocks to start until Finlay dropkicks him into the corner. Anderson comes in to beat on Larry D. before handing it off to FinJuice for a Russian legsweep/big boot combination. Acey comes in and gets the double kicks in the corner from the Brothers. Finn comes back in but gets sent into the corner, allowing the villains (Maybe?) to take turns. That’s broken up and it’s off to Anderson for the Magic Killer…but they take a bit too long and Thornstowe grabs a rollup for two. Now the Magic Killer connects for the pin at 4:01.

Rating: D. Not much to see here as the point was to build towards the Good Brothers vs. FinJuice, which isn’t exactly an interesting feud in the first place. They didn’t get much time here and that is a good thing, mainly because you might not want XXXL/Reno Scum out there very long. Maybe they should build up FinJuice a bit more other than “they’re from Japan”.

Post match, FinJuice and the Good Brothers have a big staredown.

Rich Swann talks about how Moose may be a monster, but he isn’t a World Champion. On paper, Moose is strong, fast and big, but he doesn’t have the heart.

FinJuice and the Good Brothers argue about how they almost lost. The Brothers want them to carry the bags but FinJuice wants to carry the titles. The title match is set for Sacrifice.

Brian Myers vs. Eddie Edwards

Matt Cardona is guest referee. Myers starts fast and goes after the arm, setting up a belly to back suplex. It’s already back to the arm but Edwards sends him outside, meaning Myers needs to grab a chair. That takes too long though and Edwards hits a big running flip dive over Cardona. We take a break and come back with Myers grabbing a chinlock, snapping Edwards’ throat across the top, and putting the chinlock on again.

Edwards fights up with some chops and a bridging suplex gets two. The Blue Thunder Bomb gets the same but Myers is right back with a Downward Spiral for two. Myers goes up, earning himself a Backpack Stunner for two. A reverse neck snap across the top lets Myers load up his elbow pad with a foreign object for the Roster Cut (oh good grief) and….that’s a DQ as Cardona calls for the bell at 11:05.

Rating: C-. This was more about Myers and Cardona, because that’s what you should focus on when you have Eddie Edwards involved. Myers has gotten a bit better around here, but what are you expecting from someone whose character seems to be built entirely around the fact that he’s mad about being cut from WWE. I mean….the Roster Cut?

Deonna Purrazzo isn’t worried about a triple threat match tonight. Or ODB for that matter.

Here’s what’s coming at Sacrifice and next week.

Deonna Purrazzo vs. Kiera Hogan vs. Jordynne Grace

Non-title and there are a bunch of other people at ringside. Purrazzo is sent outside to start and we take a break less than thirty seconds in. Back with Grace getting double teamed in the corner but managing to send Purrazzo outside. Grace hammers away on Kiera, who she has to hold up for a bit. Purrazzo trips Grace down but gets chopped into the corner by Hogan.

The Fujiwara armbar is broken up in a hurry and Grace sends them both into the corner. That earns her a Fujiwara from Purrazzo so a rope has to be grabbed in a hurry. Hogan high crossbodies Purrazzo for two and then gets the same on Grace. Purrazzo takes Hogan down by the leg but pulls Grace down into a failed Fujiwara armbar attempt.

Grace hits a spinebuster on Purrazzo, who manages to block a suplex. A double clothesline sends Purrazzo and Hogan to the floor, meaning it’s time for everyone on the floor to get into a brawl. Grace dives onto everyone and takes Hogan back inside for a beating in the corner. Tasha Steelz saves Hogan from the Vader Bomb though and it’s Purrazzo sneaking in to steal the pin on Grace at 12:24.

Rating: C-. This felt a lot longer than it was and there wasn’t much of a flow to the thing. The ending worked out well enough and I can go for the champ not taking a fall here. It certainly wasn’t terrible or even bad, but this didn’t feel like a main event. Instead it was a bit more flat, which isn’t how you want a main event to go.

Post match Grace and Steelz brawl to the back but here’s ODB to jump Purrazzo. ODB takes her down and poses with the title to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. I’m not sure what to think of this one as they were trying to focus on a lot of things other than the main event scene and it didn’t go well. There wasn’t much worth caring about with this show and that was getting more and more obvious with each match. Just not a very interesting show and that’s one of the worst things you can say about any given episode.

Results

Ace Austin b. Chris Bey and Black Taurus – The Fold to Bey

Tenille Dashwood b. Havok – Spotlight Kick

FinJuice/Good Brothers b. XXXL/Reno Scum – Magic Killer to Thornstowe

Eddie Edwards b. Brian Myers via DQ when Myers used a foreign object

Deonna Purrazzo b. Jordynne Grace and Kiera Hogan – Rollup to Grace

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Hard To Kill 2021: He Got Worse

Hard To Kill 2021
Date: January 16, 2021
Location: Skyway Studios, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Matt Striker, D’Lo Brown

We’re back on pay per view with this one and that means it is time to step things up. This time around, the big story is AEW’s Kenny Omega coming in to team with the Good Brothers against Rich Swann/Moose/Chris Sabin (as Alex Shelley is out due to some personal circumstances). The card isn’t looking great but Impact can do some good pay per views. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Josh Alexander vs. Brian Myers

Alexander takes him down by the leg to start and then spins out of a wristlock to put Myers down again. They head outside with Myers being driven back first into the apron but Myers shoves him hard off the top. We take a break and come back with Myers grabbing a quickly broken chinlock. Myers trips him down to cut off the comeback and the chinlock goes on again. That’s broken up as well so Myers hits a Downward Spiral for two, sending us to another break.

Back again with a discus forearm putting Myers on the floor. Alexander can’t get a German suplex but he can get the ankle lock, followed by the German suplex for two. Myers catches him with an enziguri on top, setting up the superplex with Alexander tying the legs up into a small package for two more.

A quick Michinoku Driver gives Myers two so Alexander backslides him for the same (with Striker throwing in a Kerry Von Erich vs. Ric Flair reference because he tries way too hard). The ankle lock goes on and Myers can’t roll out, so instead he pulls the headgear around to blind Alexander. That’s enough for the running clothesline to finish Alexander at 10:54.

Rating: C-. Are they kidding? Who in the world looks at Myers and Alexander (especially including their histories and thinks that Myers, as “The Most Professional Wrestler”, is the more interesting choice? I don’t get this one, but I’m hoping they have a better idea than just pushing him because he used to be in WWE. Baffling decision here, and it came after a just ok match.

The opening video looks at how people had to survive a lot over the year but they are hard to kill. This includes a good bit of AEW footage, plus Alex Shelley announcing that he will not be able to be here tonight. Moose is taking his place, which could be a bit better.

Decay vs. Tenille Dashwood/Kaleb With A K

That would be Rosemary/Crazy Steve. The men start things off with Steve headlocking him down and then tripping the leg. Rosemary comes in to crank on the arm and then hands it back to Steve. Kaleb sends him outside but thinks twice about the dive, instead bringing Dashwood in to elbow Rosemary in the face. Some shots to the back have Rosemary in more trouble and we hit the chinlock, complete with Dashwood rubbing Rosemary’s head.

Kaleb takes too much time going up though and Dashwood gets kicked into him for the crotching. Rosemary kicks Dashwood away again and the hot tag brings in Steve to start cleaning house. A rollup out of the corner brings Dashwood in for the save so Steve glares her out to the floor. Kaleb takes over on Steve’s arm, setting up a Russian legsweep for no cover.

Instead Kaleb stops for a photo, meaning Steve can avoid the moonsault. That’s enough for Rosemary to come in and clean house as everything breaks down. Rosemary hits a spear but walks into Kaleb’s superkick. The green mist hits Dashwood and Kaleb backfists Steve down. More mist blinds Kaleb and Steve hits a tornado DDT for the pin at 8:55.

Rating: C. Kind of a weird choice for an opener as the match wasn’t really a big part of the build (I’m not even sure I remember it being mentioned on TV) and it was just ok anyway. Rosemary and Steve work well together and while it’s nice to see Kaleb take the fall, it’s another miss for Dashwood. Not terrible by any means, but not a great match with a weird placement.

We run down the card. Still makes little sense on a pay per view.

We recap (with the video starting before Striker was done talking) Eric Young and company attacking various people around here. That means it’s time for Tommy Dreamer to defend his latest wrestling home, meaning we have a six man Old School tag.

Violent By Design vs. Tommy Dreamer/Rhino/Cousin Jake

Old School (extreme) rules. That would be the name for Eric Young/Deaner/Joe Doering, because every team needs a name now. Striker: “I don’t think there is anyone who has done what Tommy Dreamer has done over the last thirty years at such a high level.” I think we can write that off as the first stupid Striker line of the night and move on. The ring is mostly cleared to start and it’s Jake vs. Deaner n the big showdown.

They’re out on the floor in a hurry as we go to a triple screen (THANK YOU!) until everyone winds up on the same side at ringside. The wild brawling continues until Dreamer brings in the cookie sheet to knock Young down. Back inside and a cutter drops Young again so it’s time for Rhino, Dreamer and Deaner to chair Doering down. That isn’t enough to keep him down as Doering gets up and bites Dreamer’s head.

Deaner throws Jake off the top onto two open chairs….and exactly thirty seconds later, Jake is back up with a suicide dive onto Doering and Young. That leaves Dreamer to crotch Deaner on top and it’s something like a Tower of Doom, with Dreamer getting kicked in the face in the process. Rhino posts Doering on the floor and it’s time for the thumbtacks. Young is backdropped onto said tacks and there’s the Gore to drop Doering. Jake’s Black Hole Slam gets two on Deaner with Young making the save with the hockey mask. The piledriver finishes Deaner at 9:51.

Rating: D+. They brawled, they did the same violent spots they always do, they tried to make Dreamer some kind of legend and Young was treated as the big evil. This was almost everything I don’t like about Impact rolled into one match and I have a bad feeling that it is going to be continuing for a good while to come. Throw in Doering being the latest monster without much of a reason to care about him other than who he associates with, we could be in for a long run with these guys.

Rich Swann fires up Chris Sabin when Moose comes in. Swann doesn’t trust Moose because Willie Mack would be here if Moose hadn’t taken him out. Moose talks about playing football with people he didn’t like but he would die for them once a game began. Tonight, Omega and the Brothers are getting beaten down all night long.

Video on the Knockouts Tag Team Title Tournament.

Knockouts Tag Team Title Tournament: Fire And Flava vs. Havok/Nevaeh

For the vacant titles and that would be Tasha Steelz/Kiera Hogan, because, again, every team needs a name these days. Steelz and Hogan jump them to start with little avail, meaning it’s Steelz and Nevaeh to officially get things going. Havok comes in so Steelz bails out to Hogan, who is promptly backbreakered. A sliding clothesline gives Nevaeh two and it’s back to Havok to wreck both of them.

Havok misses a legdrop so some kicks to the face put her down for two. More running kicks in the corner give Hogan two but Havok drives Steelz into the corner. Havok tosses both of them down at the same time, allowing the tag off to Nevaeh. Steelz DDTs Hogan by mistake (yep still stupid) but Nevaeh gets caught on top.

That’s fine with Havok, who powerbombs both of them out of the corner (after walking a bit to show off). Hogan is back up with a neckbreaker on Havok and a Stunner rocks her again. Havok gets taken to the floor, leaving Hogan to hit a fisherman’s neckbreaker to Nevaeh for the pin and the titles at 8:48.

Rating: C. They aren’t exactly in the mood to give the wrestlers time tonight. This was a fairly rushed match but it’s nice to have one of the established teams win rather than a makeshift pair becoming the champions. I’m not sure what kind of a future the titles have, but it was an acceptable enough start.

Madison Rayne and Gail Kim come out to present the new titles.

Decay comes up to Taya Valkyrie but she, politely says she has this tonight. The women leave and Acey Romero sneaks into the Knockouts locker room.

Here are the unscheduled Ace Austin and Madman Fulton for a chat. Austin does not like being relegated to the pre-show panel because he won the Super X Cup. That means he should be #1 contender to the X-Division Title. So come on Scott D’Amore. Get out here and make the match. Cue D’Amore who agrees Austin needs a match so here is his opponent.

Ace Austin vs. Matt Cardona

Striker: “This is a mark out moment and I’m marking out bro!” Cardona starts fast with a running faceplant to send Austin to the apron. That means Austin can do his gymnastics on the apron until Cardona trips him face first. As Striker talks about “popping the internet”, a swinging neckbreaker drops Austin onto the floor. Fulton’s distraction lets Austin get in a cheap shot but it’s a flapjack to put him down back inside. The running corner clothesline sets up the Reboot (Broski Boot) but Fulton comes in for the DQ at 2:33.

Post match Cardona clears the ring in a hurry.

We recap the X-Division Title match. TJP couldn’t get another title shot so he put on a mask as Manik and won the title. Rohit Raju and Chris Bey want to unmask him and prove everything so we’re having a triple threat title match.

X-Division Title: Chris Bey vs. Rohit Raju vs. Manik

Manik is defending and it’s one fall to a finish. Manik dropkicks Bey to the floor to start and runs the ropes with Raju. Bey is back in and that means a three way standoff. Raju gets knocked down again and Bey uses him as a launchpad to dropkick Manik to the floor this time. That doesn’t last long as Manik and Bey switch places, allowing Raju to counter a headscissors into a reverse sitout powerbomb for two on Manik.

Bey comes back in and Raju misses a charge to the floor, allowing Manik to tie up Bey’s legs. Raju rejoins them for a standing armbar on Manik at the same time as Brown and Striker over if that is TJP or not. The double holds are broken up and Manik sends Raju outside, leaving Bey to hit a springboard kick to the head to catch Manik in the ropes. Bey misses a dive and gets apron bombed down for the mistake. Back in and Raju gets Manik’s mask off to reveal…a painted face.

Manik goes up top for a frog splash but dives into a cutter from Bey. A double Art of Finesse lets Bey cover Manik for two and everyone is down for a second. Raju is up first and ties Bey in the Tree of Woe, meaning Manik can come in with a springboard hurricanrana. The Detonation Kick connects with Bey making the save so he and Manik fight over a Tombstone.

Manik finally plants him but walks into a jumping knee from Raju. A kick to the face gives Raju two on Manik and everyone is down again. Raju is sent to the floor, leaving Manik to hit a springboard DDT on Bey. The frog splash hits Bey and Raju slides back in for two in a callback to what set this up. Raju throws Manik off the top but gets kicked in the head by Bey.

They go up top with Bey getting tied in the Tree of Woe again. Raju pulls Manik into a Crossface (which Striker says is a variation on the Regal Stretch, because, again, Striker tries too hard) until Bey makes the save. Manik rolls to the floor so Raju unloads with shots to Bey’s head, only to have Manik roll Raju up to retain at 13:52.

Rating: B. Now this was good as they were doing all of their spots in a hurry while making the match feel like a frenzy. That’s the kind of match you would want for a pay per view X-Division Title match and the show needed it pretty badly. Manik continues to be one of the best in-ring stars on the roster, but the painted face under the mask is a pretty weak way to keep things going.

Post match, Manik taunts Raju with the win.

Eddie Edwards tells Alisha that she can’t be involved in the Barbed Wire Massacre. She can’t be at risk because Eddie doesn’t know what is happening to him. Alisha promises not to go out there.

We recap Deonna Purrazzo vs. Taya Valkyrie. Purrazzo is the amazing champion, Valkyrie used to be the amazing champion, the title match is on.

Knockouts Title: Deonna Purrazzo vs. Taya Valkyrie

Purrazzo is defending and has Kimber Lee and Susan with her, while Taya has Decay. Taya knocks her into the corner to start and hammers away against the ropes. Purrazzo is knocked outside where Lee gets in a cheap shot and Susan starts recording Steve. The referee gets knocked down so it’s a big group ejection to leave us one on one. Striker is confused about whether the bell rang or not, because he was probably too busy making some reference to Georgia Championship Wrestling in 1983.

Back in and Purrazzo starts on the arm, including a Russian legsweep and a roll through into a Tequila Sunrise. Now it’s off to a kneebar so Taya has to go to the rope again. A DDT on the knee gets two but Taya is back up with chops and a spear for two. Purrazzo dropkicks the knee out but Taya runs her over again without much effort.

There’s a Curb Stomp into something like an STF, which Striker….actually doesn’t screw up (even a bad announcer finds the right move once a match). Back up and Taya can’t hit a tilt-a-whirl slam as Purrazzo takes her down into the Fujiwara Armbar. That’s switches into Cosa Nostra to retain the title at 11:35.

Rating: B-. I can go for watching these two doing their thing for a good while and that is what we got here. Purrazzo being able to pull someone into whatever painful hold she has at the moment and Taya can make almost anything work. This was exactly what it was supposed to be and I had a good time with it throughout. Above all else, it felt like a match that belonged on pay per view, which hasn’t been the case with everything else on the card so far.

Acey Romero comes up to John E. Bravo, who insists that Larry D. shot him. He calls Acey crazy but Acey found some of Larry’s Ring Rust cologne in a Knockouts bag. Bravo is intrigued. Sweet goodness WHY IS THIS STILL GOING???

We recap the fall of Ethan Page, who has gone rather insane and is feuding with his own alter ego, the Karate Man. Now it’s time for Page to fight himself.

Ethan Page vs. Karate Man

We go cinematic (duh) and they fight in front of a green screen, Mortal Kombat style. Page punches and Karate Man kicks as the background keeps changing. Then Karate Man pulls out Page’s heart to end it at we’ll say 2:30. So Page was REALLY unhappy about this online and if this is what they cobbled together after what seems like a lot of work went into it, I can completely get that. This was a waste of time from what could have been an entertaining idea and Page deserved a better way to go out than a segment which is getting as much time as the Wrestle House fallout.

Don Callis comes up to Moose in the back and reminds him that he has a two year contract. Callis suggests that if Moose hurts Kenny Omega, the contract may be ruined. Moose doesn’t want to hear it and says he’s coming for the Impact World Title. And maybe Omega’s too. Callis: “S***.”

We recap Sami Callihan vs. Eddie Edwards in Barbed Wire Massacre. They have feuded on and off for years now and this is the FINAL match, with Callihan having Ken Shamrock in his back pocket. Eddie has no one, as he has ordered his wife to stay away for her own safety.

Eddie Edwards vs. Sami Callihan

There are various barbed wire instruments around the ring, including one side of a cage with barbed wire on top/wrapped around it and various barbed wire weapons hanging from a wire above the top rope. Eddie avoids being driven into a barbed wire board in the corner, which falls over as they lock up. Sami is sent into the barbed wire in the ropes so Eddie whips out a barbed wire ring to press down onto Sami’s head. The board is on the mat but Sami is smart enough to push it out to the floor before he goes face first.

Eddie’s suicide dive (with a bit of a spin) sends him back first through the barbed wire board and Sami drops the Cactus Jack elbow for a bonus. Sami messes with some more barbed wire on the floor and takes it back inside for the slugout. Eddie gets dropped ribs first onto the wire and Sami whips him with a…..Nintendo 64 controller wrapped in barbed wire? I think I can go with this. Sami goes up but Eddie comes out with a backpack Stunner for the breather.

The Blue Thunder Bomb onto a barbed wire chair gets two on Sami but Eddie’s missed charge hits the cage wall. They hit each other in the head with barbed wire for a double knockdown so it’s time for a barbed wire kendo stick vs. the barbed wire bat. It’s better because they have the other’s signature weapon and it’s Sami dropping him onto the barbed wire board. Another barbed wire board is thrown in and Sami (mostly) bridges it between two chairs.

A super piledriver through the barbed wire board only gets two and there wasn’t even any drama on the kickout. I know it’s just a spot these days but can you at least try to have some drama in there? Sami loads up the bat to the chair on the face but Eddie kicks him away and hits the Boston Knee Party into a chair. The Emerald Flosion onto the barbed wire finishes Sami at 18:53.

Rating: B-. This is one where your individual tastes are certainly going to vary and that isn’t a big surprise. There were some completely ridiculous moments here but it felt like two people who hated each other wanting to hurt each other. The piledriver kickout was pretty ridiculous and I’m not a big fan of this kind of match in the first place, but it could have been a lot worse than what we got.

Rebellion is on April 24.

We recap the main event. Impact executive Don Callis brought in AEW World Champion Kenny Omega as part of some big elaborate plan which isn’t quite as epic as they think it is. Impact World Champion Rich Swann didn’t like it so Kenny hooked up with the Good Brothers against Swann and the Motor City Machine Guns. Alex Shelley is out for the six man though and Moose, Swann’s #1 contender and the man who hurt his best friend, is taking his place.

Kenny Omega/Good Brothers vs. Rich Swann/Moose/Chris Sabin

Don Callis is here too and handles Omega’s entrance (which Striker says is a moment fans will be telling their children about). Omega has a Bullet Club shirt (the Halloween edition for some reason) on, because we need to know New Japan history to understand the AEW World Champion’s reference in Impact Wrestling. Anderson drives Sabin into the corner to start and a shot to the face has Sabin in some trouble. An armdrag gets him right back out though and we have a standoff.

Moose and Gallows get in for the big man showdown with Moose knocking him around. Omega comes in, with Striker making both a hockey reference and saying that the Bullet Club reunion on Dynamite reminded us why we all love wrestling. It’s off to Anderson vs. Swann in a hurry with the latter snapping off a headscissors. Gallows and Omega are knocked to the floor and it’s a double dropkick to Anderson.

Moose adds a standing moonsault, with Striker saying that Moose now is the sport, a few seconds after talking about how amazing it was that the two World Champions are in a match together. Sabin gets taken into the corner so the villains can take over, including Omega hitting a backbreaker for two. Striker asks Brown if Omega is the best in the world and Brown seems to think so. There is NO MENTION AT ALL of the Impact Wrestling WORLD CHAMPION, who is in this same match, in case you needed an illustration of why Impact’s benefit from this Omega deal is rather limited.

Anderson grabs a chinlock on Sabin but the comeback sets up a double clothesline, allowing the tag to Omega and Swann (thankfully with Striker bringing Swann’s name in for the best wrestler in the world discussion). Everything breaks down and some assisted DDTs send the Brothers outside. Swann dives onto Omega but the frog splash is blocked back inside. Anderson adds a slam (with Sabin flipping him off), allowing Striker to talk about wrestling being a universal language.

The Kitaro Crusher gets two and a triple splash gets two on Swann. Back up and Swann manages a Pele to Omega and the hot tag brings in Moose. House is cleaned and the Omega BANG is mocked, setting up a triple boot to Omega in the corner. The discus lariat gets two on Omega (Striker: “HISTORY MADE TONIGHT!”) and now it’s Sabin in trouble in the corner for a change. Omega hits a Doctor Bomb for two on Sabin, who is right back up with a missile dropkick to Anderson.

Omega is up with the V Trigger to Swann but Moose catches him on top with a super Spanish Fly. Everyone is down again until Omega gets over for the hot tag to Gallows. The Boot of Doom gets two on Sabin with Swann making the save. Swann and Omega get the double tag for the big slugout with Omega getting the better of it. The other four fight outside until Moose pulls Omega off the top and into an electric chair.

Something close to a Doomsday Device gets two on Omega, with Callis teasing the save. Striker: “Some people think Callis has betrayed Impact Wrestling.” I actually had to sigh at how stupid that was so we’ll move on to Omega hitting the V Trigger on Swann. Some kicks put Omega down and the 450 gets two. The Magic Killer plants Swann and Moose has to make the save. Another V Trigger hits Moose and another V Trigger hits Swann, setting up the One Winged Angel for the pin at 20:26.

Rating: B. The wrestling itself was good, as expected, but it’s rather difficult to care about Impact when their World Champion is being presented as someone lucky enough to have Kenny Omega knee him in the face. Commentary here was a big love letter to AEW, which is being treated as the greatest thing ever as it reaches down to the unwashed masses of Impact. That may be true from a business standpoint, but why in the world is IMPACT acting like that is the case? It’s a good match and I think you know where this is heading, but could we act like Swann is close to Omega’s level? For five minutes maybe?

Omega and pals celebrate to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This show started off rather badly but then it picked up a lot of steam just before the halfway point. The big matches worked rather well and completely saved the show, which is often how a show like this tends to go. They had a nice show, but there were some things that hurt it a bit, aside from the completely lackluster first hour or so.

First and foremost, the Omega worship was out of hand to start and is just getting worse. The main event didn’t make me want to see Swann vs. Omega. It made me think that Omega is treating Swann like a practice dummy, which is completely fitting for Omega. What it ISN’T fitting for is the commentary team, who seem to be in awe of Omega and treat their World Champion like a guy who won a contest. I know Omega is a bigger deal, but can we at least act like he might have trouble against the company’s World Champion?

Then you have Striker himself and…..I can’t believe it but he has gotten more annoying. Between acting like everything you see is the greatest thing that has ever happened, trying to turn every move into some brilliant strategy that ties back into some other move and name dropping EVERY SINGLE WRESTLER HE CAN THINK OF, Striker is one of the most irritating things I have ever seen on a wrestling show. It’s great to have someone who knows history, but there is a world of difference between sounding smart and being a distraction, which he was all night long.

Overall, the show did work well, but I’m worried about where this company is going in the future. They didn’t make some of their biggest stars look good in the main event and Striker is going to be as annoying as I could have ever imagined. There are some good things happening here, but if AEW is going to be a bigger presence, I’m going to be having flashbacks to New Japan coming in to Ring of Honor and leaving it as a near wasteland. They had a good show for the most part, but the future isn’t looking so bright.

Results

Decay b. Tenille Dashwood/Kaleb With A K – Tornado DDT to Kaleb With A K

Violent By Design b. Tommy Dreamer/Cousin Jake/Rhino – Piledriver to Deaner

Fire And Flava b. Havok/Nevaeh – Fisherman’s neckbreaker to Nevaeh

Matt Cardona b. Ace Austin via DQ when Madman Fulton interfered

Manik b. Rohit Raju and Chris Bey – Rollup to Raju

Deonna Purrazzo b. Taya Valkyrie – Cosa Nostra

Karate Man b. Ethan Page – Fatality

Eddie Edwards b. Sami Callihan – Emerald Flosion onto a barbed wire board

Kenny Omega/Good Brothers b. Rich Swann/Chris Sabin/Moose – One Winged Angel to Swann

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

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Hard To Kill 2021 Preview

We’re back with another Impact pay per view, even though the point seems to be to make another company’s World Champion look good. This time around the focal point is the invading Kenny Omega, will will team with the Good Brothers against Impact World Champion Rich Swann, Chris Sabin and Moose, after Alex Shelley was forced out of the show for unclear reasons. The rest of the card looks ok so let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Brian Myers vs. Josh Alexander

This was thrown in this week on Impact since every pay per view needs a pre-show match these days. Myers beat Alexander via DQ and bragged about it so we’re having this for the sake of shutting him up. I’m not sure what Impact sees in Myers but there are far worse places he could be than in the pre-show match. Alexander is going to need a boost soon so we could have something going here.

I’m going to take Alexander here as there is no reason for this to drag on for another match. As much as he has been featured, Myers isn’t being pushed to the moon so they aren’t likely to give him anything here. The match will likely be on about the same level as a regular TV match and that’s all it needs to be given where they are here. It probably didn’t need to be here, but Alexander can get your attention well enough.

Eric Young/Deaner/Joe Doering vs. Tommy Dreamer/Rhino/Cousin Jake

It isn’t a good sign when my first reaction to a match is “at least they’re keeping it all here” but that’s about as good as I can go with this. We have Dreamer being Dreamer, the epic Deaners split, Doering (he was big in Japan, right up there with Jesse and the Rippers) and Young as some kind of mastermind because this company loves him very much. It’s also Old School rules, because they can’t say Extreme and Dreamer can’t do much else.

I’ll go with Young and company as for some reason this seems to be one of the upcoming big things. Young is tolerable enough in some spots, though the love affair with Doering isn’t exactly doing much for me. Adding in the turned Deaner isn’t going to make things better, but if they can keep all of this stuff crammed into one match, it could be a lot worse than what we’re getting.

Eddie Edwards vs. Sami Callihan

This feud MUST continue and this time it’s Barbed Wire Massacre because when you think Edwards, you need something like this thrown in. I know this is viewed as some legendary rivalry but it feels like they are just warming it up because neither has anything to do. Edwards is able to carry almost anything to at least watchable, but as soon as I heard the barbed wire deal, I could hear Josh Matthews with his machine gun delivery taking away any impact it might have.

Give me Callihan to win, likely thanks to Ken Shamrock because we need another evil alliance to triumph. Shamrock and Callihan are somewhat intriguing, but I don’t need a Barbed Wire Massacre to make it work. The match should be good enough and odds are Alisha will get involved, but I’ve been over this feud for a good while now because it ran out of steam years ago.

Ethan Page vs. Karate Man

We continue with the “why is this a thing” section, but in this case Page has so much charisma that he can manage to face himself and make it work. I’m going to assume this is a cinematic match and Page’s way out of the promotion, but you never know with something like this. The Karate Man stuff alone is always worth a look, but I’m almost scared of what to see here.

Since they’re facing each other, I’ll go with Karate Man to win and get rid of Page once and for all, which should make your head spin at least a little bit. There is a chance that we could be in for some good jokes here and under the right circumstances, this could be one of the best things on the entire show. Page is awesome at his goofy stuff, and hopefully he gets to showcase himself well on the way out.

X-Division Title: Manik(c) vs. Chris Bey vs. Rohit Raju

This is part of one of those stories that works out well almost every time because it’s a classic. Bey and Raju are convinced that Manik is TJP (because Manik is TJP) but can’t beat him or prove it, meaning their frustration factor has increased about 17 fold. Now it’s a free for all for the title, which opens up a few interesting doors as they could go in a few different directions.

I think they’ll play it safe here and have Manik retain the title because there are more places to go with something like this. Manik is someone who can have a good match with anyone and Bey is one of the better young stars around here. Raju has been rather nice as well lately, so we could be in for something good. This might be the match with the most promise on the whole show and I can’t say I’m surprised.

Knockouts Tag Team Titles: Nevaeh/Havok vs. Kiera Hogan/Tasha Steelz

Who would have thought that a tournament for the vacant titles would come down to two of the only regular teams who happened to be feuding for weeks before the tournament started? Hogan and Steelz have done a nice job of being the most annoying heels imaginable, which made Havok and Nevaeh grabbing them by their throats that much better. This was almost a guarantee for the final, so at least they’re doing the logical thing.

I’ll take Havok and Nevaeh to win here as you need some faces to win on this show. It isn’t the most intriguing match on the show but it was the only way to go to get to the tournament finals. I’m not sure how far these titles can go as WWE hasn’t been able to make theirs work for years now. The match will be the same thing that we’ve seen several times between them now but….yay belts?

Rosemary/Crazzy Steve vs. Tenille Dashwood/Kaleb With A K

This seems to have been added near the last minute and I’m still trying to make myself care about Dashwood. The Instagram deal is fine, but it feels like something you would see at a tiny independent promotion because it’s that easy of a story. There is no doubt that the talent is there, but for some reason it isn’t clicking. You can only get so far with something like this though and I think we’ve reached her current limit.

I don’t see a reason for Kaleb With A K and Dashwood to win here, even though they need it a lot more. Rosemary seems to be building up something with Susan, so unless she interferes and costs them the match, I don’t see a reason to have Rosemary and Steve lose here. The match itself should be another TV level match, which is quite the trend for most of this show.

Knockouts Title: Deonna Purrazzo(c) vs. Taya Valkyrie

The Knockouts singles division has done well enough for itself in recent months and Purrazzo is awesome as the technical wizard champion. Valkyrie is almost the old guard in a way, despite her title reign not even feeling all that long ago. While her big reign is over, Valkyrie can go in the ring with anyone and Purrazzo is one of the best things going in the company today.

Purrazzo being one of the best things going today is more than enough to keep the title on her here. Beating Valkyrie is more along the lines of beating a challenger of the month, but she just happens to be a really successful challenger of the month. It means something to beat her though and Purrazzo can continue her reign with another rather nice win added to her list.

Kenny Omega/Good Brothers vs. Rich Swann/Chris Sabin/Moose

This whole invasion (if that’s what you call Omega and Omega alone showing up from AEW) is making me think of Lando Calrissian saying “this deal is getting worse all the time”. So far, the highlight of the feud for Impact is their World Champion escaping with a pin over their Tag Team Champion. Omega and Don Callis have been treated as stars who are gracing Impact with their presence. I know it gives Impact exposure, but this is feeling more like New Japan coming to Ring of Honor every day (and that’s not a good thing).

Of course Omega and the Good Brothers win here, because why would they lose here? I know this is probably heading towards Omega taking the Impact World Title, as that is the best way to continue making Impact look like they don’t compare to AEW in any way. Yes AEW is more important and Omega is a bigger star, but sweet goodness could Impact look much worse so far?

Overall Thoughts

This show looks pretty dreadful on paper as there is nothing of note to look forward to. I’m sure some of the matches will work as Impact tends to shine when they just go to the ring and focus on the wrestling, but nothing on here really jumps out. Hopefully the show winds up working, because this feels like they have almost no reason to do this show other than they have to. It will likely be good enough, but they need to work on spicing things up.

 

 

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