Monday Nitro – June 7, 1999: Sewage, Attempted Murder, and WHAT WAS THAT?

Monday Nitro #191
Date: June 7, 1999
Location: CSU Convocation Center, Cleveland, Ohio
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan, Eric Bischoff

It’s the go home show for the Great American Bash which hopefully means we’re finally getting some new main stories instead of the drek we’ve been sitting through so far. The big old vs. new story needs to get going and hopefully we can get there after this coming Sunday. Or at least to something other than Nash vs. Savage. Let’s get to it.

We open in the back with Savage and the girls getting out of a white limo. He opens the trunk and gets out a bucket full of some very unpleasant looking stuff. Savage is looking for Nash of course.

Hak vs. Prince Iaukea

Just what I always wanted. Hak smoking a cigarette freaks Tony out. JJ comes out and says they can’t have a match until the cigarette is out. That gets him smoke in the face so Bischoff gets off commentary and gets in the ring. Bischoff gets the same treatment as Dillon so he calls off security and smacks Hak himself as the bell rings. Bischoff says let the match start and the Prince hammers away for one.

A Samoan drop is broken up by a fire extinguisher blast from Chastity and it’s table time. Eric: “Hak can’t throw two punches before he gets winded!” Hak puts Prince on the table for a Swanton but the table doesn’t break. He whips Iaukea into the table in the corner but it STILL doesn’t break so he just covers for the pin.

Morrus and Knobs come in for the beatdown on Hak but Kidman makes the save and goes after Hak until Morrus stomps Kidman down. Brian beats Hak with the stick and everyone brawls around the arena. What a waste of nine minutes.

Nitro Girls.

We look at the septic tank stuff from last week.

DJ Ran.

Bischoff: “The guy under the hood’s initials are VM.” This was the night of the Higher Power reveal. This would be more historic if anyone was watching Nitro at this point.

Master P. might be here later.

Lenny Lane vs. Scotty Riggs

Bischoff spends the intros mocking Sable’s lawsuit against the WWF. I’d be shocked if 2% of the audience had any idea what he’s talking about. Riggs gets annoyed at Lane trying to use his mirror and jumps him, allowing Eric to babble about Paul Orndorff using a mirror. Eric: “Be original.” Lane comes back with right hands in the corner and drops Riggs with a bulldog as Lodi comes down the aisle. Riggs gets taken down by an airplane spin, but it makes Lane so dizzy that he does the Sting fall onto the crotch. Dang it WCW you have to tell me when I’m watching a comedy match.

A hot shot gives Riggs control and he throws Lenny out at Lodi’s feet. Back in and Riggs drives a knee into Lane’s ribs before slapping on a chinlock. Riggs stops to look at the mirror and gets rolled up for two but avoids a dropkick to keep himself in control. He ducks an enziguri but gets caught in a reverse powerbomb of all things for two. I’ve always thought that would be an awesome looking move. Not that it matters as Riggs comes right back with a Fameasser for the pin.

Rating: D+. Scotty Riggs is not interesting, no matter how many times WCW tries to push him on their shows. The narcissistic gimmick has taken him about as far as it can, which should tell you everything you need to know. As for Lenny and Lodi, I know what’s coming, and it’s one of those things that we need to just get through as fast as possible.

Flair is in the back, trying to convince Benoit to be a Horseman again. He’s ready to pass the torch to Chris but Benoit isn’t sure. Flair talks about the feud he and Anderson had a few years back (wasn’t that faked?) and Benoit says he’ll think about it. Saturn comes in and says he and Kanyon want their rematch tonight, but Flair says he was going to give himself and Benoit the shot at the titles. Benoit reluctantly agrees and hugs Flair.

Here are Savage and the girls with the bucket. We’ll ignore his bright pink feathery coat. Savage knows Nash isn’t in the building tonight and issues an open challenge to anyone that is man enough to face him. This brings out Sting who says he’s back in black even though Savage is pretty in pink. The match is on for later, even though Sting says Savage is on Viagra. Savage: “NOW YOU’RE GONNA GET IT!” I really don’t want to see that if I can avoid it.

Nitro Girls

Septic truck stuff again.

Here’s Kevin Nash wheeling a bag to the ring. He says Savage isn’t here yet because he can’t smell Macho yet, if you know what he’s spewing. His gear is in the bag (now sitting in a chair) and he’s heard Savage saying he doesn’t like looking ridiculous, but he still comes out here looking like he does. Fair point actually. If Savage wants him, come get him.

Cue Savage with the bucket and the girls. He says he has a present for Nash because no one has ever treated him like that last week. Savage wants Nash to admit that he’s a monkey who made a mistake and isn’t on his level. Nash: “I only brought one bag down and you brought three.”

Nash bails to the floor and says if Savage wants him, put down the bucket. Macho complies but Nash wants the girls to hold open the ropes. Now he asks Savage to get on his knees and beg, which Savage kind of does. With Savage’s back to the ring, the bag starts to move. A girl gets out of the bag and empties the bucket over Savage’s head. It’s a stupid segment, but well done on the surprise with the bag.

Tag Team Titles: Diamond Dallas Page/Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Ric Flair/Chris Benoit

The Jersey boys are defending and Anderson comes out with the challengers. Page and Benoit slug it out to start with the Canadian getting the better of it. He slugs Bigelow to the floor and dives through the ropes to take him down as well. Back in and Flair hammers on Bigelow as well with Benoit snapping Page into the Crossface but it’s right next to the ropes. Off to Flair for the Figure Four and he’s able to avoid a headbutt from Bigelow at the same time.

Everything breaks down with the Horsemen chopping everyone in sight. There’s a low blow to Page and it’s off to Benoit. Page rolls over and tags Bigelow who comes in with some falling headbutts for two. A big suplex gets two on Benoit and Page draws in Flair, allowing the champs to double team. They start going after the knee as Bischoff lists off why he hates Flair and Page. Flair comes in without a tag and slugs it out in the corner with Page but gets dropped with a low blow.

Things settle back down and Page rubs Benoit’s face in the mat. Off to a front facelock as things slow down a bit. Benoit lifts Page up three times in a row but can’t drive him to the corner. A fourth time gets him even closer but Bigelow comes in to block the tag. Bam Bam misses the top rope headbutt and Benoit crawls over…..as Flair walks out. Well of course he does.

Anderson is livid so he takes his shirt off and gets on the apron as a replacement. Bigelow has Benoit in a reverse chinlock as Saturn runs out to get on the apron, kind of making this a handicap match. Benoit dives over and tags in Saturn as house is cleaned. The Death Valley Driver to Page out of nowhere gives Benoit and Saturn the titles.

Rating: C. Of course it’s not going to stand because Benoit and Saturn are young and over but it was a nice moment while it lasted. The match was all about the run-in finish and Flair turning on Benoit after turning towards him about an hour earlier. I can’t stand those kind of stories as they could be stretched out to build up the drama for weeks and instead they do it this fast. Almost every company does it and it gets old fast.

Kanyon runs out post match and nails Saturn with a Flatliner, setting up a three on two beatdown.

DJ Ran.

Ciclope/Damien vs. La Parka/Silver King

Bischoff is off commentary. This is a hardcore match for no apparent reason. It’s a brawl to start with Silver King kicking a chair into Damien’s face. Ciclope nails King with a trashcan and whips La Parka into it for good measure. There’s another can brought in and wrapped around La Parka’s head for Poetry In Motion from Damien. La Parka bails to the floor but gets caught with a baseball slide with a chair to knock him silly. Not that it matters as he picks up a chair and nails a diving Ciclope in the head with the same chair in an awesome visual.

Damien dropkicks La Parka off the chair and goes outside, only to have to throw the chair at a diving Silver King. La Parka puts Damien in the chair and takes him down with another suicide dive before Silver King throws a trashcan out of the ring and over Ciclope’s head. He follows it up with an Asai Moonsault to take everyone out in a cool spot. Damien takes La Parka back inside and takes a chair to the head followed by a trashcan lid for a bonus.

La Parka sets up a chair and tries a superplex on Damien, but has to settle for just throwing him face first onto the chair for two. Ciclope NAILS La Parka with a trashcan lid to break up a top rope hurricanrana attempt, swinging so hard that it flies to the announcers’ table and into Schiavone’s hands.

Ciclope gets backdropped to the floor as Damien is setting up a table. It doesn’t last long though as Silver King tornado DDTs Ciclope through the table for another big crash. Damien’s middle rope hurricanrana is countered into a powerbomb through another table for two. Tony: “He kicked out!” Heenan: “WHY???” La Parka sets up two chairs and powerbombs Damien onto them (with the chairs not giving an inch) for the pin.

Rating: B. WHERE IN THE WORLD DID THIS COME FROM??? This was an outstanding brawl with all four guys hitting each other as hard as they could for some awesome bumps and spots. It’s a seven minute match that had me wanting to see more, even though I’m not a fan of most of the guys involved. I have no idea where this came from or why it wasn’t done more often, but it’s worth checking out. Really good stuff.

More DJ Ran as he talks some trash about Hennig.

Norton yells at the Black and White for his loss last week. They don’t have much to say in response.

Here’s the Cat for another of his open challenges. Miller is in full on James Brown mode now, which is a big upgrade for him and his lame karate character. He brags about shaking up the world until he finally gets an opponent.

Cat vs. Horace Hogan

Horace jumps him from behind but Miller comes back with kicks and dancing. A running clothesline in the corner has Cat in trouble again but an Onoo distraction lets him get in a crowbar shot for the pin.

Cat runs from the Black and White post match.

Nitro Girls.

Here’s Roddy Piper with something to say. He sucks up to the Cleveland fans and thinks it’s time we stir things up, which he’ll do by winning control of the company back on Sunday. Unless I missed it, that’s the first time that stipulation has been mentioned. Piper has been hearing a lot of the young kids in the back saying they should be in the main event. Well he’s tired of all the complaining and wants Buff Bagwell out here right now.

Piper asks how many years Bagwell has been wrestling (eight) and if Buff has ever wrestled in Madison Square Garden. Buff says he hasn’t, so Piper calls him Buffy. Bagwell says it’s not 1975 anymore and his name is Buff. He’d do anything to get to the top, so Piper offers him a match with Flair. They shake hands and that’s that.

We go to the parking lot where the girls are in the limo. They try to get Nash to join them for a night on the town. He reluctantly agrees and gets in….as Savage is revealed as the driver. A white Hummer crushes the car. It rams the car a few more times and leaves as we see Nash’s arm sticking out of the window and falling. That’s a nice callback to Nash’s tremendous role in Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II of course. We never saw who was driving the Hummer.

Bobby Duncum Jr. vs. Rey Mysterio Jr.

Why exactly is Rey Cruiserweight Champion again? Mysterio comes out in a gas mask for no apparent reason. Konnan and Hennig are both on commentary though Konnan is at DJ Ran’s booth instead of ringside. Oh this is going to be a long match. Rey gets right in Duncum’s….well chest but it’s as close as he can get. Bobby slams him out of the corner to take over but Rey comes back by just nailing him in the face over and over.

A springboard moonsault gets two and a headscissors sends Bobby out to the floor. Thankfully he’s down long enough for Rey to stop and tie his shoe. Back in and Rey misses a charge into the corner and gets caught in a shoulder breaker for two. Mysterio slips out of a second attempt and dropkicks Duncum into the corner for the Bronco Buster. Rey is in control but Hennig just gets up and nails him for the DQ.

Rating: D+. The match didn’t have enough time to go anywhere and the ending was stupid. It didn’t help that Konnan was only on commentary so he couldn’t stop Hennig from interfering, which makes the decision all the stranger. This culture clash feud isn’t bad, but the rappers need a better talker. Or at least one that doesn’t make me want to saw off my ears with a cheese grater.

Tony and Heenan talk seriously about Nash getting crushed. The cameramen in the limo aren’t mentioned even though they’re probably dead too.

DJ Ran AGAIN.

The Steiners come out, say catchphrases, imply that Luger is gone, and say they’re at the top of the food chain. Somehow this takes five minutes.

Recap of the girl in the bag. You really can’t talk about a comedy segment after THREE PEOPLE JUST GOT KILLED IN A CAR CRASH.

Here’s Disco to complain about Bagwell. Buff had the chance to look Piper in the eye and say what he really thought of him but Bagwell didn’t go through with it. “No wonder you got thrown out of the Wolfpac.” Actually didn’t he get thrown out for saying what he really thought of Steiner? Anyway, if Buff is really a man, he’ll come out here right now for a match. Buff comes out and says at least he was in the Wolfpac. You know it’s on now.

Buff Bagwell vs. Disco Inferno

Disco jumps him from behind to start but Bagwell fights back with his wide array of punches, clotheslines and slams. A big slam lets Buff pose but Disco nails a running knee lift of his own, followed by a middle rope elbow for two. We come back from a break with Buff fighting out of a chinlock. He gets dropped with a clothesline but this time avoids the middle rope elbow. Buff makes another comeback and they trade swinging neckbreakers, only to have Buff slam him down and hit the Blockbuster for the pin.

Rating: C-. Not bad here as they try yet again to rebuild Buff. Granted this would be a bit easier if he hadn’t lost in his big showdown with Steiner, but we can’t have something crazy like a Steiner losing a match now can we? Disco is an interesting choice for a soldier in the young man army, but I’m not sure how far he can go.

Nitro Girls.

Randy Savage vs. Sting

Sting charges to the ring and Savage runs off. George jumps on Sting’s back to give Savage a shot and Macho hammers away in the corner to start. They head outside with Sting being dropped throat first across the barricade, allowing Madusa to get in a few kicks. Back in and Savage hammers away even more as he still has his sunglasses on.

More choking and punching ensues before it’s back to the floor to continue the brawling. Sting goes into the barricade again before heading back inside for some powder to his face. Madusa distracts the referee but Miss Madness gets shoved off the top. Savage piledrives the referee as this mess is thrown out.

Rating: F. Sting did not get in a single bit of offense, Savage did nothing but brawl and throw powder, and the girls had too much offense again. The main event scene is getting worse all the time, and somehow we have Savage vs. Nash coming up to keep things as low as they can be.

Sting makes his comeback after having no offense during the match. He stomps on Savage in the corner but Rick Steiner comes out to beat Sting down. Scott Steiner comes out with a belt shot to the face but Luger makes the save with the ball bat to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. Some of the wrestling was better tonight, but the stories have gone off a cliff. Stuff like Tank Abbott attacking Sting, Goldberg in general, Piper being fired, Bischoff somehow having authority again and other stuff I’m sure I’ve forgotten are either dropped of just gone with sans explanation. On top of that there’s the old vs. new story, which has been talked about for weeks but somehow hasn’t been started yet. Maybe they’re waiting for the Bash or the night after, but could we get some actual action on it instead of just people saying they’re frustrated?

It’s like this company is being run by different people week to week and no one has told the other what we’re supposed to be seeing. The ideas are the same in general, but no one has ever gone over any details. Either that or no one has any idea how to pace a story. Look at Nash vs. Savage for example. They went from Savage putting makeup on Nash to Nash covering Savage with the stuff in the bucket to ATTEMPTED MURDER in the span of a week. All of this is setting up a match on Sunday where Nash likely won’t even sell these injuries.

Then there’s Bischoff, who can’t shut up long enough to let any points get across. It’s like he’s sitting there trying to riff on the show but no one is getting half the jokes he’s saying. If he wants to make amends, why is he spending two hours a week ripping on most of the talent? The jokes are going over fans’ heads of just confusing them, given how Bischoff doesn’t seem to be on any side. Other than the non-smokers’ side I guess. Bad show here, but check out that hardcore tag match.

 

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Thunder – June 3, 1999: The Wolverine Will Save Us

Thunder
Date: June 3, 1999
Location: North Charleston Coliseum, North Charleston, South Carolina
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Larry Zbyszko

Thing shave to be getting better soon. I mean, I don’t think it’s possible for them to continue being this bad. WCW has been trying this idea of just throwing every boring idea they have out there to bury the good stuff and it’s bombing horribly. The lower card stuff is terribly uninteresting and the main event stuff is awful but there’s a little glimmer in there with all the talent they’ve got. If some of that got a better focus, there’s serious potential in there. Let’s get to it.

The announcers do their intro and the fans want Goldberg. You’ll have to wait until production wraps people.

Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Scotty Riggs

Before we have the match, Riggs has the referee hold the mirror for him. Bigelow, mentioned as a Tag Team Champion but sans belt, hammers away in the corner. Riggs escapes a slam and dropkicks Bigelow into the corner for ten punches, followed by another dropkick and choking. The big man takes him down with a drop toehold of all things and headbutts the leg before going to a chinlock.

Riggs tries to fight back but gets dropped by a knee to the ribs. They head outside with Bam Bam working on the chest and sending Riggs into the barricade. Back in and Bigelow drops a headbutt for two but gets rolled up for the same. Bigelow takes Riggs’ head off with clotheslines but charges into a boot in the corner, followed by a Fameasser for another near fall. Riggs goes up and dives into a punch, setting up Greetings From Asbury Park for the pin.

Rating: C-. Shockingly competitive match here as a new champion had to rbeak a bit of a sweat to beat a narcissistic….Riggs is a heel right? He has a heel character but he was wrestling like a face here. The match wasn’t bad for an opener and it actually entertained me instead of making me look for a pillow and blanket.

We look back at Bigelow and Page winning the Tag Team Titles on Monday. Shouldn’t that have aired before the match?

Clip of Brian Knobs attacking Hak on Monday.

Hugh Morrus vs. Kidman

Morrus hammers away to start but gets caught by a headscissors. A hurricanrana and dropkick put Hugh outside and Kidman nails a nice plancha. Jimmy Hart tries to get in a cheap shot and is stared away in fear. Back in and Hart interferes again to let Morrus take over as the power game begins.

Morrus hammers away on him in the corner and gorilla presses him down for two. He sends Kidman into the corner for a running splash but misses another charge, allowing Kidman to hit a missle dropkick. Morrus comes right back by clotheslining Kidman out to the floor. Back in and Kidman avoids the top rope elbow, setting up a Bodog out of the corner for two. Morrus’ powerbomb is of course countered but Brian Knobs runs out to break up the Shooting Star for the DQ.

Rating: D. Much more basic match here as we’re now using Kidman to push the First Family. Again, we have an example of a guy that could have moved up the card being used to push more dead end older characters that aren’t going to go anywhere but for some reason keep getting the push over someone like Kidman.

Post match the First Family destroys Kidman until Hak makes the save….and beats Kidman down as well. That’s what you get for tearing the house down with Mysterio and Guerrera for months.

Brian Adams vs. Buff Bagwell

Adams, ever the gentleman, offers a handshake but gets posed at instead. Buff hammers away in the corner and they trade atomic drops with Adams’ having no effect for some reason. An armdrag and dropkick send Brian to the floor and us to a commercial. Back with Buff fighting out of a bearhug but walking into a belly to belly suplex. We break away from that to listen to some words of wisdom from Vince. A backbreaker gets two on Buff and Adams throws out him out to the floor. Vince gets in a few more shots because he can talk trash and forearm people in the back.

Back in and Buff avoids a knee drop to start his comeback with the usual stuff: clothesline, neckbreaker, cross body, strut. The referee gets bumped so Vince brings in a chair (he can do THREE things!) and accidentally hits Adams (I didn’t say he could do them well). The referee wakes up to count the pin but says it was two, even though he slapped the mat three times and Buff’s music played. We keep going with Adams nailing a big boot and sending Buff to the floor for a beating from Vince. Bagwell dispatches him pretty easily of course and the Blockbuster gets the pin.

Rating: D. Too long here and the ending made me say “great. We get to keep going.” Adams really isn’t all that good other than being a generic power guy and there are tons of them in WCW. The match went on longer than it should have and Bagwell really doesn’t look all that special from beating up Vince and Adams.

We see Savage vs. the fake Nash from Monday.

This Week In WCW Motorsports.

Recap of Scott Norton vs. Ernest Miller.

Scott Norton vs. Silver King

I don’t see this ending well. King tries to come in with a missile dropkick but it just bounces off of Norton’s chest. The pain begins with Norton just toying with King, blasting him with a hard clothesline and even harder chops in the corner. A pair of headbutts put him down again but Norton finally misses a charge. Silver King’s moonsault press has the same effect as the dropkick and it’s another clothesline followed by the powerbomb to complete the squash.

Rating: D+. See, this is the Scott Norton I could get behind. He was never going to be a big deal in WCW but you could make him look like a monster for someone to beat in a big win. Maybe throw him into the midcard title scene if those belts weren’t locked up by the Steiners for whatever reason.

Recap of rap vs. country.

Curt Hennig vs. Rey Mysterio Jr.

If Hennig tries this could be awesome. He jumps Mysterio during his entrance and sends him face first into the buckle. Rey comes back by sending Hennig head first into the mat and nails a quick springboard legdrop to send Curt outside. Back in and Curt snaps Rey throat first across the top rope and hits a quick atomic drop to seen Mysterio throat first into the buckle. They head right back outside with Mysterio being thrown into the barricade and dropped throat first onto the barricade as we take a break.

After we look at ads for WCW Magazine, we come back with Mysterio headscissoring Hennig down and going after his knee. He dropkicks it down and hammers away in the corner until Curt rakes the eyes. Hennig drops some elbows to the chest and face, followed by the Hennig Neck Snap for two.

We even get a Rick Rude hip swivel as a nice tribute before Curt scores with a dropkick. Back up and Rey goes to the knee again, setting up a split legged moonsault out of the corner for two. Curt counters a standing Lionsault but gets sent chest first into the buckle. It’s right back to the knee to set up a springboard seated senton for two, followed by a low dropkick to the face. There’s the Bronco Buster but Bobby Duncum comes out and breaks it up for the DQ. So Konnan will stop cowboys from beating up his friends but not hardcore freaks?

Rating: C+. Yeah it was good but of course it had to end in a DQ because Heaven forbid we get a pin in anything but a squash. Mysterio looked good out there and the knee work was a nice running idea throughout the match. These two getting PPV time and a finish could be great stuff.

The cowboys double team Mysterio until Kidman and Konnan make the save.

We see the septic tank stuff with Nash and Savage from Nitro.

Chris Benoit vs. Ric Flair

Think this is going to be better? Asya is the only second in the entire match. Ric takes him into the corner to start and they trade some chops until the referee breaks it up. It’s Benoit taking over with more shots in the corner to send Flair out the floor and up the aisle. Back in and Benoit takes him to the mat and puts on a Figure Four to check off a spot on the Flair Bingo card. Ric realizes he’s about six inches from the ropes and the hold is broken.

Flair begs off but gets beaten up in the corner even more. Naitch finally goes to the eyes to get a breather and stomps away on the ropes. Asya plays old school JJ Dillon by getting in some shots but unfortunately doesn’t take off her shoe. Benoit comes back with a bunch of right hands in the corner and a backdrop to put him down again. The veteran begs off and trips Chris up for a rollup with feet on the ropes in the corner for two.

They fight outside for some Canadian chops before Benoit takes him back inside for a snap suplex. Both guys ram heads to put each other down. It’s Benoit up first with a sleeper until Ric counters, only to be sent face first into the buckle again. Chris gets two off an O’Connor Roll and fires off even more chops.

Flair kicks him in the face and tries the Figure Four but gets rolled up for another two. Ric gets in a knee crusher though and now the Figure Four goes on. The hold is turned over and Benoit makes the ropes before nailing an enziguri to put both guys down again. Back up and Benoit nails his running clothesline but Bigelow and Page break up the Swan Dive for the DQ.

Rating: B-. The intensity here alone makes it a better match but it’s not quite a great match. Benoit looked more than capable of hanging in a main event match and should be ready to move up the card. It’s a good match but we’re reaching the point where you know someone is going to run in and that’s ruining a lot of entertaining matches.

Benoit takes an elevated Diamond Cutter and isn’t saved to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. The main event brings this up a lot and it’s certainly one of the better ones, but the DQ’s need to stop. They keep doing the same thing over and over to protect people for the big matches, but then the same thing happens in the big pay per view matches. At least it was better than some of the more recent shows, even though it still wasn’t anything great.

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Monday Nitro – May 31, 1999: Now They’re Screwing Up Cage Matches

Monday Nitro #190
Date: May 31, 1999
Location: Astrodome, Houston, Texas
Commentators: Bobby Heenan, Tony Schiavone

We’re two weeks away from the Great American Bash and the main event is still dominating the card. Thankfully we’re getting some development on the rest of the card and hopefully the rise of Benoit and Malenko up the card as the new young stars of the company. Well Malenko is pushing 40 at this point so he can only be so young but you get the idea. Let’s get to it.

We open with Raven arriving at the arena but getting attacked by Bigelow and Page in the parking lot. They throw him into a dumpster and slam the lid on his head.

Recap of last week with Piper beating up Flair and the Horsemen turning on their leader.

We see Tank Abbott getting into it with Rick Steiner on Thunder.

The announcers do their thing.

DJ Ran.

Here’s Eddie Guerrero for the first time this year after a horrible car wreck. The announcers welcome him back and show us some photos of Eddie’s totaled car. Eddie lists off his injuries and hopes to be back soon. He’ll be doing some commentary to start things off.

Hak vs. Kidman

Hak has to lose the weapons to start and Kidman actually tries to make it a wrestling match. I can’t imagine it staying that way but it’s nice to pretend for a bit. They stay on the mat for a bit with Kidman holding a headscissors…and now let’s hear from Tank Abbott and his goons about how being in a cage is hardcore. He has history being in a cage you see, and he’s going to referee the TV Title match tonight.

We cut back to the match with Kidman taking over again with a dropkick. Chastity gets on the apron with a chair, allowing Hak to send Kidman face first into the steel. It’s weapons time now as I guess this was a hardcore match the whole time. Kidman is whipped into the ladder but avoids a Swanton through the table. He loads up the Shooting Star but here’s Hugh Morrus to shove him off, somehow drawing a no contest in a hardcore match.

Rating: D. There was some decent wrestling to start but then we went to the hardcore stuff and a Tank Abbott promo because we can’t do that at some other point. I don’t know why they insist on wasting Kidman on something like this when he’s capable of having good matches with any talented guy you throw at him.

Brian Knobs comes out to beat up Hak.

Flair is in his office and orders eight women to his room tonight. JJ Dillon says Savage’s elbow is officially banned. So what else can he actually do?

Clip of Steiner and Abbott on Thunder.

Eddie thanks the fans and Bischoff for believing in him.

Here are Bigelow and Page with something to say. Page rips on the fans and says he knew it was wrong to put Hogan out with a knee injury. He tried to apologize but last week Hogan knocked him out with a crutch as he was leaving. Bigelow and Page threaten to put Hogan on the permanent injured list before turning their attention to Raven and Saturn. They took the trash out earlier and now don’t want to wait for the Great American Bash for their title shot.

Kanyon is going to take Raven’s place in the Tag Team Title match tonight.

DJ Ran doesn’t like Curt Hennig not liking hip hop. Oh geez they’re going to have him advance stories now?

Curt Hennig comes out to the commentary desk and insists that rap is crap. Hennig likes country music better and is going to go sing a country song at DJ Ran’s booth. Bobby Duncum Jr. comes out to sing with Curt and they belt out Blame It On Texas. It’s not really singing as much as it is rhythmic talking but they’re trying. Konnan and Mysterio come out in their Astros jerseys for the save. A tag match is made for later.

We look at Hennig and Konnan brawling last week. Wouldn’t this fit better before the previous segment?

Van Hammer vs. Evan Karagias

Evan gets hammered on to start and is quickly put in a Tree of Woe. He avoids a charge though and grabs a headlock, only to be shoved away and shouldered down. A headscissors takes Hammer over but he counters another attempt with a hot shot. Hammer plants him with a backbreaker and Vader clothesline for two before putting on an abdominal stretch. Evan actually hiptosses the big guy over, only to get caught in a delayed vertical suplex. Hammer gets taken down again and a high cross body gets two, but he grabs the cobra clutch slam for a quick pin.

Rating: D. Hammer really needs something besides the cobra clutch slam. That’s a move that almost anyone could do and while it’s decent for a power guy, he needs to do something that looks a lot more devastating. Or we could just not have Hammer on TV and see how well that works for us.

Here’s Piper to say God bless America and talk about the Horsemen breaking up last week. He calls Flair a gelding and asks Malenko to come out here for a chat. Piper praises Dean as the best cruiserweight of all time but Dean doesn’t say anything. He takes the mic and says that Flair walked out on the Horsemen and last week was just them responding.

This brings out Flair and Anderson but Dean cuts them off and says the Horsemen weren’t supposed to be about feeding Flair’s ego. WCW needs to be about passing the torch and letting the younger guys get their chance on top. Flair says he hasn’t met anyone worth passing the torch to yet. Dean goes to Arn and says last week he promised to have Arn’s back anywhere, but that was last week. Piper and Flair get in a fight and Flair runs away. Natrually that’s the focus instead of Anderson and Malenko because it’s Flair and Piper.

Nitro Girls.

Eric Bischoff joins commentary for no apparent reason.

Konnan/Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Curt Hennig/Bobby Duncum Jr.

So much for Rey defending against Kidman, at least for now it seems. Konnan and Rey wear what appear to be prison uniforms. The cowboys try to sing a little bit but get dropkicked in the back to start fast. Mysterio dropkicks Curt’s leg and shouts WEST SIDE on the middle rope. Hennig and Duncum are knocked out to the floor for a breather as Bischoff praises Rey. Back in and Hennig nails Mysterio in the ribs with a right hand before it’s off to Duncum for a shoulder breaker.

Back to Hennig who whips Rey across for the Bret Hart chest first bump to the buckle. The cowboys keep up the fast tagging with Bobby throwing Mysterio around like a rag doll. Mysterio nails a quick dropkick to Hennig and slides between Curt’s legs for the hot tag to Konnan and a genuine eruption from the crowd. There’s the Tequila Sunrise on Hennig but Duncum breaks it up with the cowbell for the DQ.

Rating: D+. It’s another culture clash feud but at least most of the guys in it are worth watching. Duncum had potential to be good but the cowboy thing was only going to take him so far at this point. It’s not a bad match but I groaned at the cowbell ending. WCW was so obsessed with getting rid of the southern identity but they have that around?

Konnan gets hogtied post match.

Here’s Savage on his own with something to say. He talks about Nash being on his way to the arena when Madusa comes out to say Nash is here. Savage calls Nash out for later in another segment that didn’t need to be in the arena.

Page and Bigelow are in the back, standing over an unconscious Kanyon.

David Flair vs. Erik Watts

Holy sweet mother of goodness they can’t be serious. Bischoff just buries both guys, saying Erik got his push because of his dad and that David absolutely sucks. Well he had to be right at some point. He even says that his son would have a winning record if he was in charge. There were warning signs of Garrett Bischoff coming and no one stopped him??? Erik hammers away to start and clotheslines Flair out to the floor. He rams David into the buckle a few times and yells at Papa Flair.

David manages to avoid a dropkick and tries the Figure Four, only to get kicked out to the floor. A suplex brings him back in for two and Watts starts picking him up every time. David is tortured with a Rock Bottom, pumphandle slam and chinlock slam. He loads up another Rock Bottom but Anderson sneaks in for a spinebuster to give David the pin.

Rating: N/A. I can’t rate this because I can’t help but laugh. This is the kind of match that you see on lists of the worst possible matches you could imagine. Like, you say this as a joke instead of something that could actually happen. That’s what we’re dealing with here because WCW actually did it. Raw could be airing a midget Brawl For All against this and it might not be as stupid an idea.

Video on Nash vs. Savage.

Buff tells Flair he wants Savage again tonight but is given a suitable replacement: Bobby Eaton. Buff: “Does he even work here anymore?” Either way, Bagwell promises to hurt him tonight.

Ernest Miller comes out to call out Norton for a fight. Well at least that’s what I think he’s saying as Bischoff keeps talking about how the company in New York is beating them right now and he’s partially to blame. Anyway here’s Norton and we get a bell.

The Cat vs. Scott Norton

Norton immediately nails Cat with a headbutt and knocks him for a loop. He hammers away in the corner as we see the Black and White laughing in the locker room. With Cat down in the corner, Sonny slips him a crowbar to knock Norton silly for the surprise pin.

The Black and White runs out of the locker room.

Here are Savage and the girls again because we haven’t seen enough of them. Well ok that’s true in George’s case. Nothing is said before Nash’s music comes on and here’s…..a tall guy in drag wearing a replica belt. Savage says this is a match so we get a bell, allowing Savage and the girls to get in shots, such as a top rope hurricanrana from Miss Madness and a middle rope elbow from George. Savage drops the banned top rope elbow for a pin before celebrating with the belt. Again, is there a point to this or are we supposed to draw our own conclusions? For some reason Bischoff thinks Miss Madness is a man.

Nitro Girls.

Recap of Bagwell beating Savage by DQ on Thunder. That would be the second time Bagwell beat Savage by DQ on Thunder.

Buff Bagwell vs. Bobby Eaton

For some reason Bischoff goes on a rant about how worthless Jesse Ventura was on commentary. Eaton hammers away to start and goes after Bagwell’s face, only to get monkey flipped and dropkicked to slow him down. Two boots in the corner stop a charging Eaton and a clothesline drops him for two. Buff misses a charge and falls to the floor before taking a swinging neckbreaker in the ring. Bischoff keeps up his tirade by ripping on Bagwell for no apparent reason before switching over to Konnan. Buff comes back with a suplex and hiptoss followed by the Blockbuster for the pin.

We look at Raven getting taken out earlier.

Tag Team Titles: Saturn vs. Bam Bam Bigelow/Diamond Dallas Page

Bischoff calls Page one of the biggest mistake he’s made in WCW. Saturn grabs a mic and says he’ll keep the titles by himself tonight. Page calls Saturn stupider than he looks. Bigelow gets things going for the only team in the match and shoves Saturn down with ease. A shoulder block does the same as Bischoff hypes up Tank being in the cage tonight. Saturn comes back with a springboard cross body to Bigelow and a belly to belly to Page. Some clotheslines put the challengers on the floor and we take a break.

Back with Bigelow getting in a knee from the apron, allowing Page to clothesline Saturn down to take over. It’s back to Bigelow for a falling headbutt and a two count before the discus lariat gets two for Page. A Batista Bomb gets two more and things slow down a bit. Page comes back in with a top rope clothesline for another two and we hit the chinlock.

Bam Bam comes in off the top but misses the swan dive. Saturn superkicks both guys down and sends the challengers into each other. The Death Valley Driver gets two on Page and there’s one for Bigelow as well. Cue Kanyon to stand in the wrong corner and get the hot tag, but Page hits him once for the pin and the titles.

Rating: C. Well it’s clear that something is coming with the booking but again with the young and talented teams losing the belts so fast. Did they really have to change the titles in just a few weeks? They couldn’t have waited for the pay per view? Page and Bigelow aren’t even an interesting team as they’re just two guys from Jersey. You wouldn’t see Norton and Hennig as a team because they’re both from Minnesota would you? At least the match was decent though.

Savage and the girls are trying to leave in the limo but it’s blocked by a septic truck. You can see it coming from here. Nash is driving, gets out, puts a hose in the sunroof and the villains gets sprayed. Nash says something about this portion of Nitro has been brought to you by Septic Services, for all your savage septic needs. Ok funny line.

DJ Ran.

The cage is lowered.

TV Title: Rick Steiner vs. Sting

In a cage with a roof, Steiner defending and Tank Abbott as the guest referee. Sting sends Rick head first into the cage to start and stomps away with Steiner not all that interested in selling tonight. The champ comes back with a low blow and hard right hands followed by an elbow drop. A dropkick sends Rick through the ropes and Sting rakes his face on the cage before hitting a Stinger Splash, driving Steiner against the steel.

Rick comes right back with a suplex and a ram into the cage of his own. We hit the chinlock as Tank just kind of walks around and doesn’t do anything of note. Sting fights up again and nails another dropkick as there isn’t a lot of energy for this match. Some clotheslines look to set up a splash but Rick raises his knees.

Sting slips off Steiner’s shoulders but can’t get a backslide. Instead he tries a very modified Gory Stretch, only to have Rick get to the cage to escape. Sting sends him into the corner for the Splash but Abbott pulls Steiner out of the way. Rick tapes Sting to the ropes as Tank leaves, meaning in two weeks, they’ve now ended a cage match and a battle royal in no contests.

Rating: D-. Holy sweet Christmas they’ve managed to screw up a cage match. For one thing, it’s WAY too early in this feud for a big gimmick match. On top of that, the match lasted less than eight minutes and was there to push Tank Abbott than for the match itself. The fact that it’s Rick Steiner refusing to sell ANYTHING makes sitting through this even worse. Horrible match here and even worse storytelling and decision making.

Abbott and his goons walk out to end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. So let me get this straight: we had two and a half hours of Bischoff’s out there commentary, Tank Abbott screwing over Sting for a no contest in a cage match, a no contest in a hardcore match, Curt Hennig singing, more Flair vs. Piper and one of the worst possible matches in the history of wrestling. I know I’ve said this before, but it can’t possibly get any worse than this.

Now to be fair there’s some decent stuff in here, such as the Tag Team Title match and most of the Horsemen segment, but the bad just cripples anything the good can do for the show. The big story needs to actually go somewhere and that doesn’t seem to be happening anytime soon. It’s far more old vs. old with talk of the old vs. new not going anywhere. There’s still time, but we need to get there and actually fire up the company a bit.




Thunder – May 27, 1999: Well…..It Was Better

Thunder
Date: May 27, 1999
Location: North Charleston Coliseum, North Charleston, South Carolina
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Larry Zbyszko

Believe it or not things are looking up just a bit in WCW. The most recent Nitro was just a disaster instead of the worst show ever. There is an interesting story coming up with the old guard not being happy with the lack of respect they’ve been getting from the younger crowd, which led to Benoit and Malenko turning on Flair earlier this week. Let’s get to it.

We open with a video of Savage’s recent path of destruction, even though his girls have done most of the work.

The announcers do their thing. It’s Sting vs. Rick Steiner in a cage on Nitro.

Lash Leroux vs. Kaz Hayashi

Leroux takes him down to start and works on the arm before putting Kaz on the mat again with an armdrag. Back up and Kaz offers a handshake, only to kick Leroux in the ribs instead. A dropkick puts Leroux down again but he avoids a spinwheel kick, only to get caught in a backslide for two. Things slow down a bit as Kaz gets into kick and chop mode before dropping an elbow.

We cut to the back to see Savage and the girls because this is his company now. Savage is looking for Bagwell but beats up Disco Inferno and Scotty Riggs instead. Back to the match happening in the background, Leroux hammers away in the corner with right hands. We get more kicks from Kaz because he’s from Japan, meaning he only knows how to kick you see. He mixes things up by going to the eyes, only to have the fans chant that both guys suck.

Leroux comes back with some very basic offense before a kind of sitout Dominator for two. The Whiplash is countered and Kaz kicks him in the ribs again, followed by a quick hurricanrana. Lash crotches him on top but gets shoved right down, only to dropkick a diving Hayashi out of the air. Now it’s Lash going up but getting superplexed down, setting up a top rope senton splash to give Kaz the pin.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t bad but the Savage thing put a big halt in the middle of it. These are the kind of guys that WCW could use to help flesh out the cruiserweight division a bit and thankfully they were able to have a match without Hugh Morrus interfering and eliminating them both. This is what Thunder should be about: showcasing guys that don’t get time on Nitro.

Van Hammer vs. Prince Iaukea

Time for more of Hammer’s latest push that won’t go anywhere. Iaukea tries to speed things up to start and actually hits an enziguri to stagger the big man before dropping him with a springboard dropkick. Not that it matters as Hammer kicks Iaukea’s head off to put him on the floor. The beating continues outside until Hammer launches him back inside. We cut to UFC fighter Tank Abbott in the front row. UFC wasn’t a huge thing yet as they had only had nineteen shows at this point. Abbott had fought for them as recently as October 1998.

Iaukea gets sent into the apron a few times and goes head first into the steps. Back in and we hit the bearug for a bit with Iaukea saving himself using the power of a hard head. He tries to slam Hammer and gets crushed for two for his efforts. Iaukea goes back up and gets crotched, setting up a superplex (same sequence from the first match) followed by the cobra clutch slam for the pin.

Rating: D. When I was talking about showcasing talent that doesn’t get the spotlight on Nitro, I meant guys that you would want to see getting spotlight like that. Instead here we had two guys who either aren’t interesting or haven’t been interesting in years. Thankfully it was a pretty short match but anytime Iaukea is out there it gets painful.

Video on Nash vs. Savage.

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Video from Nitro of Savage attacking Nash and lipsticking him.

Gene brings out Savage and the girls for a chat. Savage thinks Nash fears him, that Bagwell disrespected him, and that he’ll take the title at the Bash. The girls all think Savage rocks and that’s about it. This really didn’t need to be an in ring segment.

The Cat vs. Vampiro

This is the result of an open challenge after Cat ripped on Scott Norton, calling him Yogi Bearer for some reason. Sonny Onoo offers Vampiro money to leave, allowing Miller to get in some cheap shots from behind. Vampiro comes back with kicks to the ribs and ducks a kick that winds up hitting Sonny. More shots to the face have Miller in trouble but he nails Vampiro low to escape. It doesn’t seem to have a long lasting effect though as Vampiro keeps kicking and nails a Rock Bottom. Onoo knees him in the back though and Miller finishes Vampiro quick with the Feliner.

Benoit goes into Flair’s office to yell at him but Page jumps Chris from behind and beats him down.

Here’s Brian Knobs with something to say. He brags about being hardcore and all that jazz until Jimmy Hart interrupts. Jimmy says he managed Brian in the past and wants him back for the First Family. Brian isn’t sure but will think about it.

Clip from Nitro of Flair and Piper fighting.

Clip from Nitro of Hennig and Konnan fighting.

Konnan vs. Kenny Kaos

We get a bunch of catchphrases from Konnan followed by him praising all of his friends. Feeling out process to start until Kaos’ wristlock is countered with an armdrag. Kaos drops him again with a a clothesline and elbow before we hit the way too early chinlock. Back up and Konnan hits his wrap around bulldog and the low dropkick followed by some right hands in the corner.

A few clotheslines and a suplex get two on Konnan and we hit another chinlock. Kaos shouts at the crowd a lot and gets caught in a DDT for a quick two. We get the usual from Konnan but he charges into a powerslam. Kaos goes up, misses a guillotine legdrop and gets caught in the Tequila Sunrise for the submission.

Rating: D. Gah these matches can be dull. Kaos is a guy that doesn’t have anything going for him and Konnan is suddenly all cool with Nash again despite having issues with him just a few months back. This was just wrestling to fill in space on a card which can be the least interesting things imaginable when there’s no motivation.

This Week In WCW Motorsports.

Video on Nash.

Lenny Lane vs. Evan Karagias

Evan hammers away to start and grabs a hammerlock before dropkicking him down. A clothesline puts Lane on the floor and here’s Lodi to watch they match. Lane sends Evan into the apron and then the steps before they head back inside for an elbow from Lenny. He sees Lodi and….doesn’t seem to mind. Evan jumps over him in the corner and drives in ten right hands. A springboard clothesline gets two on Lenny but he grabs an airplane spin of all things.

Evan gets dropped with a gutbuster as Lodi seems very pleased. Back up and Karagias gets two off a cross body. Lodi: “Looking really, really good.” Evan pops back to his feet and floats around into a faceplant. A cross body gets a delayed two but Lane gets Karagias onto his shoulders for an electric chair slam for two. Not that it matters as Evan slams him down and hits a corkscrew splash for the pin.

Rating: D+. This could have been worse and was somehow a breath of fresh air after all of the boring stuff we’ve sat through for the last hour or so. That being said, I have a bad feeling about where the Lodi stuff is going as it’s likely going to be yet another big embarrassment for the company.

From Nitro: Piper yells about Flair a lot.

Video on Sting/Luger vs. the Steiners.

Gene talks to Tank Abbott at ringside and Tank doesn’t seem to be all that happy with what he’s seen so far. This hardcore division is a joke and the wrestlers all look pathetic. Gene says there’s going to be a “shoot” cage match on Monday between Sting and Rick Steiner, which Tank of course laughs off. This brings out Rick Steiner to yell, start a fight, and get pulled away. He wants Abbott to come to Nitro as Tank is taken out by security.

Recap of Flair giving the Jersey boys the Tag Team Title shot and the Horsemen quitting as a result.

Chris Benoit vs. Diamond Dallas Page

This has potential. Benoit comes out to what used to be Dean’s theme for some reason. They immediately slug it out to start and Benoit has him in the Crossface fifteen seconds in. Page gets to the ropes and bails to the floor, only to have Chris take him out with a dive. He sends Page head first into the post but walks into a knee back inside. A belly to back suplex puts the Canadian down but Benoit just chops him into the corner and stomps him in the chest.

Page gets back up and counters a whip with an elbow to the jaw to put both guys down. They roll outside with Page being sent into various steel objects, only to send Benoit into the barricade as we take a break. Back with Benoit catching Page coming in but his right hands in the corner are countered with a low blow and hot shot. A stomping puts Benoit on the floor before a big gutbuster has him in trouble back inside.

Benoit gets tied up in the Tree of Woe for another stomping. We hit the chinlock, complete with something like a chinlock slam for two. Off to a sleeper on Benoit but he jawbreaks his way to freedom. Some running right hands put Page down and a bridging German suplex gets two. That’s not enough for Benoit so he rolls some more Germans until Page breaks it up with a low blow. A big sitout powerbomb gives Page a near fall but Benoit counters the Cutter and puts on the Crossface in the middle of the ring. Since we can’t have someone lose clean around here though, Bigelow runs out for the DQ.

Rating: B-. This took its time to get going but once they got to the trading big moves section, they really started to cook. The ending was inevitable though as they couldn’t put Benoit over because Page has a title shot coming up and you don’t want to put Page over because Benoit is coming off a big turn. Good match though and a nice pick up after the bad show so far.

Flair, Bigelow and Page beat down Benoit and no one makes the save.

Another video on Nash vs. Savage.

Randy Savage vs. Buff Bagwell

After some jawing from both guys and a few Nash insults from Savage, the girls shove Bagwell to give Macho the early advantage. Savage busts out a wide variety of choking before taking it outside to drop Buff’s throat on the barricade. Back in and Miss Madness nails a top rope missile dropkick to prove her worth. Savage ties Bagwell in the Tree of Woe before choking even more. Off to a neck hold as Patrick yells at two of the girls, allowing George to use her shoe on Buff’s throat. Savage yells at Patrick so he actually gets a chair to defend himself. That’s fine with Randy, who takes the chair away and nails Buff for the DQ.

Rating: D. If this is supposed to get Bagwell over, they’re doing a horrible job of going about it. This was a total squash until Bagwell won on a DQ due to stealing a referee’s weapon. Again, the girls help him out WAY too much as well, even though in this case he could have won on his own pretty easily.

Overall Rating: D. Somehow this was an upgrade over some of the recent shows. Above all else, there was nowhere near as much talking on this show. That being said, it meant that we had a lot more time for wrestling, and that has rarely been Thunder’s strong point. The Benoit vs. Page match was good and a very nice break from the norm, but this old vs. new thing has a big hole to dig them out of.

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Monday Nitro – May 24, 1999: Disaster

Monday Nitro #189
Date: May 24, 1999
Location: BI-LO Center, Greenville, South Carolina
Commentators: Bobby Heenan, Tony Schiavone

The big story tonight is the return of Hulk Hogan, which somehow sounds like a breath of fresh air. Randy Savage has been pushed as a killing machine because he wants the title, but he’s gone back and forth on being good or evil in the last few weeks. He helped the heel Page keep the title for reasons that aren’t clear, then he feuded with Flair as a face, and then just started going after Nash without ever having a big evil moment. Either way he’s dragging the company through the floor, but to be fair almost everyone else is too. Let’s get to it.

We open with an In Memory Of graphic for Owen Hart and a three bell salute.

We recap the Steiners becoming the super evil brothers and squaring off with Sting and Luger last week.

Recap of the main points of last week’s show and Thunder with Savage beating up five guys on his own.

Bigelow is yelling at Raven and Saturn and reminds them about getting a partner. DDP runs up with a 2×4 and the champions get beaten down. Old guys over young guys again.

Nitro Girls.

Tony says his thoughts and prayers are with the Hart Family.

Van Hammer vs. Chavo Guerrero Jr.

Both guys are already in the ring so I don’t see this lasting long. Hammer is now just a basic big man and looks a bit like a biker. He throws Chavo around to start hammers away in the corner. A big boot drops Chavo but he comes back with a dropkick and drop toehold. That earns Chavo a press slam but he slips down the back into a sunset flip for two. A suplex and legdrop get the same for Hammer but Chavo escapes the cobra clutch slam. Chavo tries a Thesz press and gets caught in a bearhug, followed by the Flashback (Alabama Slam) for the pin. Total squash.

Video on Randy Savage.

DJ Ran.

Gene brings out a banged up Disco Inferno who is wearing sunglasses to cover up a black eye. He didn’t care for Savage’s “traveling show of pimps and ho’s” attacking him on Thursday and says he can get Savage in touch with Nash. Savage has been going after the young talent in the company and thinks it’s because Randy is afraid of them.

This brings out Ernest Miller of all people to dance and tell Disco to be a man. Disco wants Cat out of his face (would he prefer DJ Ran all up in his area?) and the fight is on. Nick Patrick comes out but is quickly knocked to the floor so I don’t think this is a match. Miller goes after the eye with a show and other referees come down to get Disco out. We cut to the Black and White locker room for the “Miller is talking about you” bit with Norton, because that’s still a thing. Norton chases Miller off.

Mike Tenay goes into Flair’s office.

Video on Nash.

Flair and Anderson are with El Dandy and offer to elevate his status for a loss to David tonight. Buddy Lee Parker comes in and asks for the office and secretary he was promised. Instead he’s given a Gold’s Gym membership and an offer to fight Benoit tonight. Parker takes it and says he won’t lay down again.

Gene brings out Mike Tenay who has an update on the Randy Savage situation: he’s getting the World Title shot at Great American Bash. Ric Flair storms out and talks to a woman in the audience, saying her mom rode Space Mountain twenty years ago and maybe she’ll get to tonight. As for business, Savage has injured Charles Robinson and Flair is thinking about banning the top rope elbow as punishment. He’s the ONLY man in WCW with power so Bischoff and Piper can tell their stories walking. Now it’s time to make some future stars. Flair loses his voice while saying this, maybe realizing how bogus what he’s saying is.

El Dandy vs. David Flair

During the entrances, Tony announces that the Tonight Show match has been canceled, meaning Nash may be here tonight. Dandy gets taken down by a shoulder and clothesline as David can barely even run the ropes properly. He avoids a dropkick though and backdrops Dandy with ease. A nice looking suplex gets two but Dandy smacks him in the face. Anderson sneaks in for a spinebuster, setting up the Figure Four for the win. Again, it really doesn’t look like the guys are throwing the matches, making this story a bit confusing.

Gene brings out Buff Bagwell who agrees that Savage is scared of the younger guys. Savage can come after him anytime, but tonight it’s about getting the TV Title. I could get behind a young vs. old story.

Here’s a five minute package on Eric Bischoff’s rise to power in WCW and joining the NWO. We’re nearly halfway through this show and have seen two matches but we have time for a guy who presumably has no power.

Battle Royal

Ciclope, Kaz Hayashi, Prince Iaukea, Johnny Swinger, Juventud Guerrera, Villano V, Damien, Kidman, Psychosis, Lash Leroux, Blitzkreig, Evan Karagias

The winner gets a shot at Rey next week. Juvy falls down on the way to the ring. I guess he tried to watch the show and started falling asleep. It’s a huge brawl to start with everyone sending everyone else to the ropes for attempted eliminations. Damien slams Blitzkrieg and Villano gets knocked down by something the camera misses. Iaukea works on Kidman near the ropes as Leroux is almost put on by Psychosis.

Ciclope gets taken down but not out by a top rope hurricanrana. Blitzkrieg takes Leroux out with a hurricanrana of his own but falls outside for a double elimination. Good timing too as the ring was too full. They keep slugging it out on the floor as Kidman clotheslines Iaukea out. Since this is WCW though, here’s Hugh Morrus to come in and destroy everyone in sight. Everyone jumps on him but he’s able to throw out Damien, Swinger, Psychosis, Ciclope, Kaz and Evan.

That leaves Juvy and Kidman in the ring, because Heaven forbid anyone other than those two get pushed against Mysterio. Kidman goes after Morrus as Juvy bails, but for once Morrus is able to powerbomb Kidman in half. No Laughing Matter cruses him again and Morrus goes up for a second, but Rey runs out and dropkicks Morrus to the floor. There’s no bell, but since Kidman is the only guy left in I’m assuming he wins. Either that or WCW just managed to have a battle royal end in a no contest.

Rating: F. For failure because there’s no other word to describe it. The cruiserweight division is a disaster right now as no one but Juvy, Rey and Kidman are consistently pushed and now Hugh Morrus, a jobber to the stars, beats up about six guys with ease before another runs away from him? On top of that, we’re now heading towards Kidman vs. Mysterio AGAIN? Assuming Rey even has a challenger that is. What a mess.

Here’s Piper to really get things going. We get some standard cheap heat with mentions of the local baseball team and Piper saying he’s had about fifty fights in this town and two or three of them were in the ring. Piper doesn’t care for Bischoff’s apologies but his real issue is with Randy Savage. Well of course it is. He lays down on the mat and calls out Savage but gets the girls instead.

Piper asks Miss Madness how she won the title before asking George where Savage is. She says he’s being honored and Piper makes Slim Jim jokes. He yells at all of them until Flair comes out for a save, earning him a beating. This brings out Page and Bigelow to lay out Piper for some reason. Page says Flair owes him, so Flair gives him a Tag Team Title shot at Great American Bash. Ric also makes another match between him and Piper for the show because….oh you know the drill by now.

Benoit and Malenko are in the back watching what just happened. Dean wants to know where their title shot is and thinks you have to be over 45 to get a push around here. Dean Malenko: wrestling’s smartest man. Benoit thinks Flair is for Flair and Dean says every man is for himself. That might do it for the Horsemen.

Video on Luger and Sting’s history together, going back a long way.

Piper is getting his ribs taped up and says he wants Flair/Page/Bigelow vs. himself and two partners. Gee I wonder who they’ll be.

Tony says WCW is partnering with Tommy Boy Records to merge wrestling and music. They’re about fifteen years too late but that’s WCW for you.

Curt Hennig comes out and tells Tony to turn him on. His headset you see. Curt doesn’t like rap music but did like beating up Konnan recently.

Video on a Tommy Boy Records wrestling themed party.

Chris Benoit vs. Buddy Lee Parker

Hennig is still on commentary and talks about how young guys like Benoit aren’t respecting the veterans that came before them. A black arm band can be seen on Chris’ arm for Owen. Parker actually gets in a few shots in the corner to start and I don’t see him getting in much more offense.

As you would expect, he charges into a boot in the corner and gets caught in the Rolling Germans. Benoit chops the fire out of him in the corner before hitting a quick belly to back suplex. Parker comes back with a powerslam, only to get drop toeholded into the middle turnbuckle. The Swan Dive sets up the Crossface and Parker taps very quickly.

Rating: D+. It’s always fun to see Benoit run someone over like this. Parker was older than dirt at this point and had been getting beaten up for years now. That’s probably why he was such a jerk down in the Power Plant. The match was just there for Benoit to show how awesome he was, because somehow that wasn’t an established fact to the WCW brass at this point.

TV Title: Rick Steiner vs. Buff Bagwell

Before the match we get a chat from the Steiners. Scott rips on WCW, saying they suck with Heenan saying “good point.” After bragging about the Red and Black, we get a perfect Scott line as he calls himself the US Champion and Rick the United States Television Champion. Bagwell charges the rings and hammers away at both Steiners, actually knocking Scott out to the floor. A quick dropkick puts Rick down but he starts going after Buff’s neck to take over. He ties Buff in the Tree of Woe so Scott can choke away from the floor.

Bagwell comes right back with a neckbreaker of his own, only to have Scott trip him from the floor. Scott gets in a few shots and Rick knocks Bagwell out to the floor with a Steiner Line. The brothers pull the mats back and Rick actually piledrives Buff on the floor. Things are about to get even worse with Scott holding Buff’s neck across the barricade as Rick goes up top…..and we’ve got a Sting monster truck in the aisle. Lex Luger, in a Sting mask for some reason, is driving. We cut back to the ring and Sting is there with his bat as we go to a break.

Rating: D. ANOTHER match ends in a DQ or a no contest because Heaven forbid anyone have to job around here. At least the stuff with Rick was short, though I’m still waiting on Goldberg to come back and fight the Steiners for what happened to him at Slamboree. Instead we’re getting Sting and Luger teaming up until Luger turns heel again and starts yet another feud between them.

Hennig is still on commentary and ripping on rap, so here’s Konnan to start a fight. They brawl into the ring with Konnan beating the tar out of Curt.

Mike Tenay is in the ring and calls out Jimmy Hart and Curt Hennig. Jimmy wants Mysterio out here right now to explain what happened earlier. Morrus complains about the same guys having the same matches for four years now and he wanted to mix it up a bit. Again, they need to stop saying things that the critics are saying. Rey starts brawling with Morrus and uses his usual springboard based offense until Jimmy trips him up. Hugh crushes him in the corner and plants him with a huge powerbomb. They get a chair but Konnan and Kidman come in for the save.

Here’s Hollywood Hogan for his big return from knee surgery. He’s still in a big knee brace and on crutches but is being all heelish anyway. Hogan praises Nash because they’re both part of the Pack and says he’s coming for Page. We get a reference to Raw, called the XXX Wrestling on the other channel. Hogan is the master of politics and has seen the people talking in the back, so he’ll return soon brother.

Nash comes out for a chat because Heaven forbid we get another match. After sucking up to the crowd ala Piper, he gets to the point of Savage running around like a crazy man after the World Title. Nash isn’t hard to find: he’ll be the guy with the big gold belt for a long time to come. This brings out the girls again with George’s leg hurt again. Why she’s wearing high heels while on crutches isn’t clear but at least she looks good.

Nash talks to George, saying he’s seen her wrestle but he’s rather see her box. The girls go after him and break a crutch over Nash’s back but it doesn’t seem to have much effect. Savage coming out and nailing him with the belt does have an effect though. We get the lipstick on the face thing again which is still kind of stupid.

Roddy Piper/???/??? vs. Ric Flair/Diamond Dallas Page/Bam Bam Bigelow

After a break, Malenko (in street clothes) and Benoit come out be Piper’s partners. Piper has his ribs taped up from the attack earlier and thankfully is sporting a black armband of his own. Unless I missed it, that’s the second of the entire show. Page and Malenko get things going but Dean wants Flair instead. Once Flair is in, Benoit wants to fight instead. They take turns chopping each other’s chests off until Benoit backdrops him down.

Benoit cleans house and clotheslines Bigelow out to the floor as everything breaks down. Flair finally gets back in and backs into his own corner, which Heenan calls a bad neighborhood. A thumb to the eye and chop put Benoit down and the Jersey boys come in to take over. Bigelow headbutts him down for two before Flair comes in for a low blow. Page has to break up a backslide but Bigelow misses the top rope headbutt. The hot tag brings in Piper and here are Raven and Saturn to go after the Jersey guys for the DQ.

Rating: D. FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THINGS GOOD AND HOLY STOP WITH THE FREAKING DQ ENDINGS! You can’t get a clean ending to any main event match around here and I’m getting sick of it. Also, why in the world did we need Piper out there? To give former World Tag Team Champions credibility? Heaven forbid Piper isn’t around every two seconds to make things feel big.

It’s a huge brawl post match with the good guys getting the better of it. Piper puts Flair in the Figure Four as Benoit stomps on him. Ric bails and we cut to the back where Hogan is standing over a fallen Page to end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. Oh sweet goodness this got old in a hurry. There were FIVE matches in three hours. Think about that for a minute. Nothing broke ten minutes and they can only give us five matches, one being a battle royal that ended in a no contest? Obviously there were major outside circumstances to it, but the ratings results for this night: Nitro’s 3.1 losing to WWF’s 7.2. Nitro hadn’t been that low for a regular show in over two years and Raw only topped that once in the entirety of the Monday Night Wars. This was a disaster for Nitro and a sign that things had to change.

Luckily for them, there actually was a glimmer of hope here. This idea of old vs. new, albeit the same thing they did with WCW vs. the NWO three years ago, has something to it as you can see the battle lines being drawn. Unfortunately some of those lines are just Piper’s wrinkles BECAUSE HE WON’T JUST GO AWAY, but there’s something there. Granted I have have no confidence in WCW because the old guys won’t lose once in awhile but it’s better than nothing.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Slamboree 1999 (2014 Redo): They’re Making This Up As They Go Along

Slamboree 1999
Date: May 9, 1999
Location: TWA Dome, St. Louis, Missouri
Attendance: 20,516
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan, Mike Tenay

Things are going downhill in a hurry around here and the pay per views can be the biggest disasters they have. The main event here is Page vs. Nash for the title along with a Sting vs. Goldberg match that you had to pay attention to hear about. We also have Piper vs. Crazy Flair for control of the company, even though both have been fired in recent weeks. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is your basic look at the three main events with a bunch of circles coming out of the middle of the screen. The rest of the card gets a quick focus as well.

The announcers do their opening chat.

Gene runs down the card as well and plugs the Hotline.

Tag Team Titles: Chris Benoit/Dean Malenko vs. Saturn/Raven vs. Kidman/Rey Mysterio Jr.

Kidman and Mysterio are defending and this is one fall to a finish with three guys in the ring at once. You can only tag your own partner. Saturn and Kidman drop Malenko with a double clothesline to start before a dropkick puts Dean on the floor. Benoit comes in and gets dropkicked as well before Saturn nails Kidman with a dropkick. A huge belly to belly suplex sends Kidman flying out to the floor as the fans think the Horsemen suck.

Back in and Benoit grabs a German suplex on Kidman for two with Raven making a save. Rey comes in and throws Raven down before taking Chris down with a hurricanrana. Mysterio’s slingshot legdrop hits Benoit by mistake to give Raven two. Kidman and Benoit drop Raven across the top rope but the Canadian turns on his short term partner. This is really fast paced stuff so far.

Kidman misses a top rope splash on Benoit and gets caught in the Crossface until Raven makes a save. Raven hits a front suplex on Kidman so Saturn can nail a top rope splash but Dean makes a save of his own. Malenko throws Rey over his head but Mysterio lands on the top rope and moonsaults back onto Dean for two. Awesome spot. All six guys are in now but it’s quickly down to just Raven and Saturn.

The Horsemen come back in to clean house and double team Saturn. They do the same to the champions until we settle down to Benoit vs. Kidman vs. Saturn. Kidman runs Benoit over but Saturn crotches him on the top and runs him over, sending Kidman to the floor. Benoit runs Saturn over and knocks him out to the floor as well. Back and in and Benoit and Saturn collide to give Chris a two count. Benoit rolls some Germans but Kidman runs in for a last second save.

Saturn counters the Cloverleaf with a small package for two but Kidman makes another save. Dean spits at Rey to tick him off, allowing the Horsemen to run Kidman over. It’s back to the tagging again as the announcers are saying let the guys fight. A snap suplex gets two on Saturn and Benoit stomps away at Kidman. Dean comes back in and throws Kidman in the air, earning him a dropkick to the chest. Saturn tags Raven in for some rolling vertical suplexes on Benoit for two.

Kidman brings in Mysterio for some near falls and everything breaks down. A top rope clothesline drops Benoit and a springboard seated senton does the same to Saturn. There’s a Bronco Buster to Raven before the champs do the launched hurricanrana off the top to take down Benoit. They try it on Saturn but Mysterio gets planted with a super sitout powerbomb.

Kidman reverses a powerbomb from Saturn but Saturn calls for the Death Valley Driver. This brings in Anderson for the spinebuster to Saturn and Dean puts on the Cloverleaf. Someone in a Sting mask, DDP shirt and backwards hat comes in to shove Kidman into the Evenflow to give Raven the pin and the titles.

Rating: B+. This was a really hot opener and I can’t imagine how good it was going to be if they let the guys go nuts like Tony was asking for. Either way it got the crowd into things and was the right way to end this long running feud. Raven and Saturn are the only ones that haven’t had the belts yet, though they didn’t need Kanyon’s help to get them.

The masked man was Kanyon.

Video on Page.

Konnan vs. Stevie Ray

This is due to Ray attacking Konnan a few weeks back. Ray hammers Konnan down in the corner to start but Konnan comes back with right hands and a float around bulldog for two. Back up and Stevie nails a big boot to take over before sending Konnan out to the floor for a beating from the Black and White. Stevie hooks a chinlock back inside before a suplex gets two. Konnan fights up for the rolling clothesline and X-Factor but has to knock Vincent off the apron. Mysterio comes out to try for a save but has to fight off the Black and White. In the confusion, Rey nails a top rope seated senton on Stevie to give Konnan the rollup pin.

Rating: F. A six minute Stevie Ray vs. Konnan match had a referee distraction and three people interfering for a rollup finish. The match was boring and WAY too much chinlock before all of the interference. It doesn’t help that the story was barely there, making the match feel all the more pointless.

Video on Nash.

Rick Steiner says he has a lot to prove.

Video on Sting, mostly with clips from 1997.

Page and Bigelow are in the back and have a conversation we can’t hear.

King of Hardcore: Brian Knobs vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

I think the title is vacant coming in but you can’t really tell with this company. We get a bonus stipulation for the match: falls count anywhere. I guess that’s only standard in WWF hardcore rules. Neither guy has music. They start with the weapons early and Brian nails him with a waiter’s tray and cookie sheet. Bigelow botches raising his feet in the corner by kicking the trashcan when it’s down by Brian’s knees. Bam Bam puts him on his shoulder for something like a backwards suplex into a Diamond Cutter for two.

The top rope headbutt gets two for Bigelow as the announcers get in a stupid argument over talking when the weapons hit. Knobs misses a chair shot and falls out to the floor to really make it hardcore. Bigelow sends him into the steps and hits Brian with various metal weapons. He uses a pair of trashcan lids like cymbals around Knobs’ head and hits a LOUD cookie sheet to the head.

Both guys are already looking spent. Bigelow is sent into the weapons cart but Brian misses a charge into it as well. Brian gets a mop bucket put on his head and a punch makes things even worse. The fans want tables but get a chair to Knobs’ ribs instead. They fight over to the souvenir stand that is there for them to fight in. Off to backstage (complete with a shot of about 10,000-15,000 empty seats. Remember that this is a football stadium) and swing a ladder at each other. Knobs dives off a ledge onto Bigelow to drive him through a table. Naturally he jumps too far and just crashes because this match is a disaster. Bigelow suplexes him through the table for the win.

Rating: D-. Heenan’s line of “And they do this for a living” sums up the whole thing. The fact that these people make more money than I likely will in years makes me feel very very sad, though that might be due to the last twenty five minutes of whatever it was that I’ve had to sit through. Between Stevie’s lame chinlock and this mess, I need something good to cleanse the pallet.

We recap Rick Steiner vs. Booker T. THAT’S NOT WHAT I MEANT!!! They’re fighting because Booker is champion and Rick Steiner is employed for some reason.

TV Title: Booker T. vs. Rick Steiner

Booker is defending. They circle each other for a minute or so until Rick hammers him with right hands and a belly to belly suplex. Booker bails to the floor for a breather as the crowd is silent. Back in and Booker fires off some kicks with a spinning shot to the face putting Rick on the floor again. Steiner head back inside and gets elbowed in the jaw for two before the champ puts on a chinlock.

They head outside a third time with Rick sending him into the barricade over and over. A release German gets two for Steiner and he hammers away with right hands on the mat. Booker tries to fight back but gets elbowed into the corner to keep him in trouble. Back to the chinlock on the champion before a hard kick to the face drops Steiner again. The sidewalk slam sets up the missile dropkick but Scott Steiner runs out for a distraction. Rick gets two off a Steiner Line but Booker sends the brothers together. The side kick gets two and Booker is fired up, until Scott grabs his foot. The Steiner Bulldog gives Rick the title.

Rating: D. Can anyone explain to me why the Steiners are both champions in 1999? He’s had like two matches back and he gets to pin Booker T. on PPV? It’s getting really frustrating watching Booker have consistently good matches (when he doesn’t have a horrible opponent of course) and have to keep rebuilding himself up because WCW keeps wasting him.

We recap Gorgeous George vs. Charles Robinson. This is a side feud of Savage vs. Flair who are feuding for reasons not quite clear. Robinson is Little Naitch here and has been calling George a bimbo.

Rick looks for Scott in the back and warns Buff Bagwell to be careful tonight.

Charles Robinson vs. Gorgeous George

If George wins, Savage is reinstated. Robinson is doing a perfect Flair impression here, complete with the smirk and strut. The nurse is now named Asya (oh so funny) and Flair is at ringside here. Charles’ fingers are even taped up. Thankfully George isn’t dressed like Savage. Flair says he’s always wanted Madusa to ride Space Mountain and Miss Madness can come with her. George is being left to Little Naitch though and Charles says he’ll let George ride Space Mountain all night. Savage gets on the mic (pop of the night so far) and says George is going to destroy Robinson.

We get started and Charles is now in regular Flair gear. They stall for about a minute and Naitch avoids the lockup and WOOs. Well woos actually since he’s Little Naitch. Robinson gets in Savage’s face so George cranks on his arm. They trade wristlocks with George cranking on a hammerlock followed by a full nelson. She shoves the Nature Boys together and the big guys get in for a staredown.

Robinson and Miss Madness fight over a chair on the floor. Naitch shoves her down and slams her so Savage calls for a medic. The regular referee shoves Robinson down as the match kind of stops for a bit. Back in and Robinson chokes George on the ropes before being sent into the corner for a Flair Flip. He runs the apron and goes up, only to get slammed off the top. George nails a clothesline and the Flair Flop sets up a two count.

Asya trips George up and cranks on her knee but Kung Fu Madusa makes the save with a kick to the head. Robinson goes after the bad leg and NOW WE GO TO SCHOOL! He puts on the Figure Four but George turns it over. Flair sneaks in to save Robinson but Savage slams Robinson, setting up the top rope elbow from George (so much for the leg) for the pin.

Rating: C. Well they tried. That’s more important than anything else here and the match was WAY better than it could have been. This could have been a disaster and it wound up being a fun little match. Robinson nailed the impression and George looked great in her cheerleader outfit. Again, they tried and that’s what matters in something like this.

We recap Steiner vs. Bagwell, which stems from Steiner blaming Buff for losing the TV Title and Buff saying Steiner’s ego was out of control.

US Title: Buff Bagwell vs. Scott Steiner

Buff is challenging and jumps Steiner before he can get to the mic. A swinging neckbreaker drops Scott while he still has the belt on. Steiner drops Buff with a low blow and the muscle clothesline gets two. He plants Buff ribs first against the turnbuckle before tying him up in the Tree of Woe to crank on Bagwell’s neck. Scott chokes and swears a lot before planting Buff with a butterfly powerbomb for two. Total dominance so far.

There’s a belly to belly but Scott goes outside and grabs a chair. Buff clotheslines it into the champ’s face before making his comeback with a dropkick. There’s an atomic drop but Scott pulls the referee in front of a clothesline. Cue Rick Steiner to chair Buff into the Recliner to keep the title on Scott.

Rating: D. Erg this show is trying to drive me crazy. I have no idea why WCW thinks the Steiner Brothers being together (after never having a real match against each other) is a good idea, but this is what they’re going with to combat Austin and Rock vs. the Corporate Ministry. They deserve what they get.

Video on Goldberg.

Video on the two singles matches people might want to see. That would be Sting vs. Goldberg and Nash vs. Page if it’s not clear.

Video on Flair being the crazy president. I’m sure the fans must be loving this.

Roddy Piper vs. Ric Flair

For the Presidency. Charles Robinson comes out to be referee and Johnny Boone is fired for the heck of it. Piper slaps Flair down to start as Tenay tries to make sense of who has been fired. Tony: “Who knows?” Ric is knocked to the floor but Robinson won’t let Roddy go after him. Back in and they trade chops in the corner until Piper punches Flair down. They head outside with Piper throwing more chops against the barricade to keep control.

Back in again and a low blow puts Piper down. Robinson: “You got a stomach ache?” He yells at Piper for choking before turning his back so Anderson and Asya can get in some shots of their own. Another low blow drops Roddy but Flair takes forever to cover, allowing Piper to make his comeback. He can’t follow up after a backdrop though and Anderson chokes him on the ropes. Roddy fights back with chops to Ric’s chest and Flair flips over the corner and out to the floor.

That’s a bit too much work so they head back inside for a collision to fall on the mat. Flair is up first and starts going after the knee as this match just won’t end. A cannonball onto the leg sets up the Figure Four but Piper quickly turns it over. Ric sends him outside again but gets his trunks taken down on a sunset flip attempt.

The worst backslide in history gets no count as Robinson is with Anderson and a small pile of unfastened boxes (there’s no package to it at all) gets the same. Piper puts on the Figure Four and Flair shouts that he gives up but Anderson comes in for the save. Roddy slaps a sleeper on him but has to let it go to put it on Ric. Asya comes in for the save and gets kissed and put in the hold as well. Piper finally nails Robinson but gets hit with a foreign object as Robinson gets up just in time to count the pin.

Rating: F. This was on pay per view in 1999 so it’s a failure on principle alone. On top of that, the match was a disaster with the spots being totally blown and neither guy looking like he had the energy to last three minutes let alone the twelve this got (third longest match on the card). Horrible match, but we’re not done yet.

Eric Bischoff comes out for the first time in months and says he isn’t screwing this up. He declares Piper the winner for reasons that aren’t explained. Why he has the authority to do this (remember that he had his power stripped), why he’s suddenly good (not explained) and why he did this (ok to be fair there are about a million reasons to disqualify Flair. I’ll give him that one) aren’t explained. Piper immediately fires Flair and thanks Bischoff for what he did.

Very quick video on Goldberg vs. Sting in case you didn’t catch the other three of them.

Sting vs. Goldberg

The announcers spend the entrances trying to explain the Bischoff stuff. Feeling out process to start with Sting trying to escape a powerslam but falling out of the air. A powerslam puts Sting down again and Goldberg clotheslines him out to the floor. Back in and Sting ducks a superkick and hits a dropkick to stagger Goldberg. A clothesline puts Goldberg outside as well and it’s a stalemate.

Back in and Goldberg puts on a cross armbreaker but Sting makes the ropes. Sting goes after the knee and drops all of his weight down onto it a few times. There’s a Boston crab but Goldberg powers out of it and sends Sting out to the floor again. Back in and Sting grabs a headlock as this is still in low second gear.

The headlock goes about as well as you would expect and Goldberg hiptosses Sting over. A horrible looking swinging neckbreaker drops Sting for two but he jumps to the top for a clothesline. The Stinger Splash is countered into a spinebuster which the announcers call a spear. Cue Bret Hart to beat up the referee and whack Goldberg with a chair for the no contest.

Rating: D+. This was really dull as they were just filling time until they got to the stupid ending. Sting vs. Goldberg is a match that should have headlined Starrcade at some point but instead it’s used as a plot device to get Bret Hart back on television, because you know WCW is going to use him right after a year and a half of wasting him.

Bret destroys Goldberg’s knee for a bit and leaves. The Steiners come out to beat up Sting and Goldberg because they’re the top villains now I guess.

Yet another Nash vs. Page video because three weren’t enough.

WCW World Title: Diamond Dallas Page vs. Kevin Nash

Nash is challenging. Page tries a fast Diamond Cutter but gets shoved away, only to come back with rights and lefts. A big boot puts the champion on the floor before Nash brings him back inside for some slow right hands. Page fights out of the corner and keeps swinging away until Nash shoves him across the ring. A low blow stops Nash and Page uses the distraction to cut off a turnbuckle pad. That’s just a distraction to let Page hit Nash with the microphone for two.

Nash rolls to the middle of the ring and pulls Page face first into the exposed buckle. A very delayed cover gets two as both guys are still laying on the mat. They slug it out again and a clothesline puts Nash outside again. A Diamond Cutter on the floor lays Nash out, meaning we continue the lack of action. For reasons not quite clear, Page thinks this is falls count anywhere (he says that to the referee and is stunned when it’s not true). Back in and Page gets two with his feet on the ropes.

An elbow drop between Nash’s legs let Page pose even more. He goes to put on the Figure Four around the post but Nash kicks him into the barricade. Back in and Nash still can’t get up. The fans look at something in the crowd as Nash makes his comeback, complete with Snake Eyes onto the exposed buckle. There’s the Jackknife but Savage runs in for the DQ.

Wait scratch that as Bischoff still has some authority and says keep going. They’re just making this nonsense up as they go aren’t they? Tony says this is No DQ even though Bischoff never said that. Page hits a Russian legsweep and a clothesline for two before puttnig on a horrible looking sleeper. Nash reverses into a hold that looks like he’s trying to rip off Page’s ear. The champ grabs a jawbreaker for two and gets a chair. The chair hits the top rope and nails Page in the head for two. Back up and the big boot and Jackknife give Nash the title.

Rating: D-. Another boring match which fits the theme tonight. We still have no explanation as to why Savage and Page are associates now and I can’t imagine we ever will. This was supposed to be about Nash getting revenge for Hogan, but given that it hasn’t been mentioned in weeks, I’m assuming WCW has forgotten about it. Bad match here with neither guy feeling interested in working.

Overall Rating: D. I can’t say a show with an opener that hot is a failure. This period of WCW has the biggest problem a wrestling company can have: it’s really uninteresting. The matches aren’t very good for the most part, but that sort of thing can be fixed. The problem here is the main stories range from really stupid to something that completely falls apart if you think about it for more than five seconds. Things are about to get even worse though and the few good spots are getting rarer and rarer.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Monday Nitro – May 3, 1999: Let The Inmates Run The Asylum

Monday Nitro #187
Date: May 3, 1999
Location: Charlotte Coliseum, Charlotte, North Carolina
Commentators: Bobby Heenan, Tony Schiavone

It’s the go home show for Slamboree and even though a lot of stuff changed last week, we’re right back where we were seven days ago. Flair is still insane but is getting to face Piper for control of the company this Sunday, even though both are fired. On top of that we’re getting ready for Page vs. Nash and in theory Nash won’t give away the title if he wins it again. Let’s get to it.

We open with Flair, Anderson and the nurse in a limo and on his way to the arena. There’s a bus next to them full of the mental patients. A guy that looks a lot like Scott Hall is driving.

Video on last week’s two World Title changes.

DJ Ran.

Nitro Girls.

Gorgeous George workout video.

The Nitro Girls have a website.

Video on Flair being insane.

MORE DJ Ran, now with a Nascar driver.

Kidman/Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Armstrongs

Non-title. Steve and Kidman trade arm holds to get things going before a dropkick sends Steve over to his corner. Both guys tag out and it’s Steve running over Rey with a clothesline. Mysterio comes back with some dropkicks and brings Kidman back in, only to have him sent out to the floor.

That goes nowhere so Kidman comes back in and avoids a charge before taking Steve down with something resembling a Bodog. Rey comes in with a springboard seated senton as everything breaks down. Steve’s powerbomb to Kidman is countered and Kidman puts him on top before launching Rey up for a top rope hurricanrana and the pin.

Rating: D+. The Armstrongs didn’t get to do much here but there was only going to be so much done with a week before a three way Tag Team Title match. Rey and Kidman are a good team but they seem like they’re there to be beaten by a bigger name team and not as a long term thing. Then again most smaller teams usually are.

Post match the Horsemen come in and beat down the champions. Raven and Saturn come out for the save before beating down Kidman and Mysterio. This brings the Horsemen back in to put Raven and Saturn in their holds and stand tall.

Highlight reel of Jackhammers.

The Cat vs. Buff Bagwell

We get the usual insults to the “rednecks” by Miller before he offers Buff the five seconds. Buff poses at him and gets kicked in the face for his efforts. Back up and Buff dropkicks him out to the floor and the stalling begins. Miller gets back in and wants a handshake, only to stall even more by standing around.

Some armdrags put Cat down but Onoo gets in a few shots to take over. Not that it lasts long though as Bagwell comes back with a swinging neckbreaker, only to have Onoo block a sunset flip to really put Miller in control. A chinlock doesn’t last long but Miller rakes the eyes to stop Buff again. Bagwell makes a quick comeback and Onoo’s latest interference backfires, allowing Buff to hit the Blockbuster for the pin.

Rating: D-. This felt like it went on forever and the match never got interesting. Bagwell had a nice string of wins going here as he’s getting ready for the US Title match on Sunday. Granted it’s not like a win over Miller means all that much as he’s about as uninteresting as you can be at this point. Really dull match.

Miller yells at Onoo post match.

DJ Ran the third.

Flair and his large company arrive and immediately go to the ring. Ric yells about wanting Sting, Savage, George and Goldberg out here. Before they come out here, he fires Savage and grants himself a World Title match in Charlotte. This brings out Savage and the girls as we go to a break. Back with Savage and Madusa beating up the security that tries to arrest them.

Flair grabs George as the cops come to the ring and arrest Savage. Robinson talks trash and struts but George breaks free and slaps him down. The nurse chokes George out as Flair insults Goldberg and Sting. This brings out Sting to punch Ric in the face, followed by Goldberg who does the same. Sting and Goldberg brawl, beat up security and brawl some more until a ton of guards break it up. Somehow this whole thing took over fifteen minutes.

After a break, Flair is talking to Stevie Ray of all people and offers Stevie $100,000 to take Nash out tonight. Ray agrees.

Nitro Girls.

Hardcore Hak vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

The winner gets Knobbs on Sunday for the title King of Hardcore. Wasn’t Bigelow the King already? They throw weapons in before the match and trade trashcan shots to start before Bigelow nails him with a pair of lids. A mop to Hak’s face sets up the required Surge container shot. Bigelow puts him into a ladder and through two tables but Hak hits a quick bulldog onto a ladder and actually works the leg a bit. We take a break because this match needs to keep going for some reason. Bigelow superplexes Hak through two tables as Knobbs comes in with a trashcan to beat on both guys and the match is thrown out.

Rating: F. Am I to understand that a hardcore match just ended in either a doublt DQ or a no contest? I had to sit through another of these messes and now I’m probably going to have to sit through a triple threat match on Sunday? Horrible non-match with nothing redeeming whatsoever. Well maybe the Surge was good.

Ray tells the Black and White that Flair gave him $50,000 to take out Nash. The mental patient AAA was in the bathroom because….I really don’t think I want to know why.

Video on Piper.

AAA warns Nash about the Black and White’s plans.

Konnan vs. Horace Hogan

Konnan threatens the Black and White with unidentified backup. Horace gets dropped with a bulldog to start and they head to the floor for some brawling. Back in and Horace takes over with a few clotheslines and puts on a chinlock. A big boot and splash get two for Horace before we’re back to the chinlock. Horace goes up and dives into a boot, setting up Konnan’s usual offense. The Sunrise goes on but the Black and White runs in for the DQ.

Kevin Nash runs out for the save and cleans house with Konnan. So much for them fighting a few months ago.

Some more of Flair’s friends from the hospital are in the production truck.

Flair, Anderson and Robinson are in the back when David Flair and Samantha come in. Ric thanks his son for helping him and puts him in the main event tonight. David is happy and leaves with Samantha but Ric is smiling. He tells Robinson to book David vs. Meng and also wants Robinson to tell Meng that David thinks Meng can’t go in the ring anymore. Anderson shakes his head.

Piper arrives in a limo because WCW doesn’t understand wrestling fans. He charges into Flair’s office and beats him up as cops come in for the save. Piper slaps one of them as well and puts a Reality Check shirt on Flair.

After a break, Flair sends Scott Steiner after Nash.

More DJ Ran and Nitro Girls.

We go to a press conference with Lex Luger and Liz but the signal goes out before anything can be said.

Scott Steiner asks Mysterio where Nash is. Rey points him to a dressing room and Steiner goes in, only to get beaten down by Buff Bagwell. That might be the worst segment I have ever seen on so many levels.

DJ Ran and the Nitro Girls, maybe two minutes after the previous time.

David Flair vs. Meng

Samantha has officially been named Torrie for no apparent reason. No that it matters as David sends her to the back, making this match far less appealing. Flair tries some chops and gets about as far as you would expect. A big headbutt puts him on the floor but Meng throws him back in so he can no sell even more of David’s offense. Meng actually does sell a few shots to the ribs but he rakes David’s back to slow him down again. A suplex sets up the Tongan Death Grip to mercifully end this quick.

Ric comes out and laughs at David as he’s taken out on a stretcher. He tells his son to never try to get rid of him again.

Video on Diamond Dallas Page.

Gorgeous George workout video again.

Here’s DDP with something to say. It’s his standard promo now: he’s come a long way, he doesn’t care what the people think, he’s old but new while Flair is old and old.

Nitro Girls AGAIN.

TV Title: Curt Hennig vs. Booker T.

Booker is defending in this rematch from Thunder. Hennig takes him down with a shoulder and busts out a cartwheel of all things. The champ’s throat gets snapped across the top rope and Hennig starts on the leg by wrapping it around the post. This brings out Stevie Ray but he misses the slap jack shot. Rick Steiner comes out and attacks Booker for the DQ.

Cops are told to go get the inmates.

WCW World Title: Ric Flair vs. Diamond Dallas Page

Page is defending and Robinson is referee. Feeling out process to start with Page shoving Flair into the corner and stomping away. Some choking has Flair in trouble but he comes back with chops and right hands in the corner. A hiptoss sends the champ out to the floor and Ric chops away against the barricade. Both guys are sent into the barricade and Flair chops him up the aisle.

What looked like a low blow gets Page out of trouble and they head back inside. A swinging neckbreaker gets two on Flair and we hit the chinlock for a few seconds. Page fires off elbows to the head in the corner but Ric snapmares him down and drops a knee for two. More choking lets Page send Flair out to the floor. Back in and Flair gets slammed off the top for another near fall and there’s a Figure Four on Flair. Robinson is freaking out but he and Ric start whispering to each other.

Ric finally makes a rope but Page puts it right back on. You don’t see that too often. Flair lifts Page’s leg off of his to break the hold, which you don’t see that often either. Back up and Page’s discus lariat gets two before we hit the chinlock. Flair pops up and elbows Page in the jaw before going up. Oh come on Flair you would think……HE ACTUALLY HIT THE AX HANDLE! Savage and George come to the ring as Flair hooks the Figure Four. Robinson goes after George as Savage slips Page a foreign object for a shot to the head. Another referee comes out to count the pin.

Rating: C-. The match wasn’t bad but it was a bit too messy. It also didn’t help that we had a heel vs. a heel in a city where one of the heel was going to be a face but the heel that is a face has been acting especially heelish all night long. To be fair though there were so many other problems with this show that this was bearable.

Overall Rating: F. Other than Gorgeous George’s outfit, this was one of the most worthless shows I can remember in a very long time. Without the awesome cruiserweight matches or Page and Sting stealing the show, this is a bunch of stories starting and stopping in one night (we can also add another entry to the list of World Title matches with no hype) with either no logic or continuity.

Then you have the pay per view coming up. Flair was attacked by Piper and never mentioned it. You would think Page was defending against Flair and Nash was facing Stevie Ray on Sunday. Page getting another title win is fine but at least have him be on camera with Nash instead of having Flair try to take Nash out, which Nash didn’t address either. You had Steiner and the Black and White trying to take out Nash, which was used to build up Bagwell vs. Steiner and Konnan vs. Ray. That’s good, but Nash doesn’t have a single word for Flair? That’s the other problem: why wasn’t Page doing that?

Finally, what was up with Flair? He was supposed to be insane but he still seems perfectly rational and had two plans tonight (hiring people to go after Nash and the stuff with David) plus wrestled like he has for years. The story seemed like a way to get us to Piper vs. Flair, which is happening in 1999 because WCW thinks that’s enough to combat whatever Raw was running at this point. By the way, this show was up against a main event of Steve Austin vs. The Rock. Maybe they were lucky this disaster happened this week.

There was no thinking put into this show and it really showed. They kind of put the focus on Slamboree but it felt like the TV show was the much bigger priority here. There’s a thought to that, but when the TV show is a disaster like this with everything going all over the place, the strategy doesn’t work. It was a mess this week and Slamboree looks ok at best.

One last note: Nitro is preempted on May 10 by the NBA Playoffs so there won’t be another Nitro review up for two weeks.

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Thunder – April 29, 1999: I’ll See Your Smackdown And Raise You…..Whatever This Was

Thunder
Date: April 29, 1999
Location: Bryce Jordan Center, State College, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Larry Zbyszko

The question coming out of Monday is will anything that happens tonight actually mean anything. Nitro saw two World Title changes resulting in Diamond Dallas Page winning and losing the title on the same show. We’re still on the way to Slamboree with Nash vs. Page for the title and Flair vs. Piper (both of whom may be fired) for control of the company. Let’s get to it.

After the opening sequence, we get some clips of Flair in the hospital on Monday. Thankfully Scott Hall’s bizarre cameo is omitted.

TV Title: Booker T. vs. Curt Hennig

Curt is challenging. Booker shoves him into the corner to start as the announcers talk about the second World Title change on Monday. A hiptoss sends Curt out to the floor and we take an early break. Back with Hennig hammering Booker down and kicking him in the ribs. They switch to boxing for a bit until Booker nails him with a forearm to the head for two.

Some right hands in the corner have Booker in trouble but Curt steps forward for a hot shot into the buckle. A low blow has Booker in even more trouble and Curt chops away in the corner. Curt puts on a sleeper for a good while before hitting a piledriver for two. Booker pops back up and hits the super, ax and side kicks. He goes up for the missile dropkick but Stevie Ray comes in with the slapjack to Hennig for the DQ.

Rating: D+. That sleeper just crippled anything the match had going for it. This Booker vs. Stevie stuff isn’t the most interesting story in the world but maybe they’ll actually have a match as a result unlike Rick and Scott. Hennig was coming back from an injury here and he didn’t look like his usual self.

Hotline plug

The Nitro Girls are getting their own site.

Video on Nash.

Here are Hak and Chastity with something to say. Hak talks about how awesome his hardcore matches have been and calls the three way with Bigelow and Raven the most extreme match ever. Chastity gets to pick his opponent for tonight and the schoolgirl chick selects Kevin Nash. Great. The hardcore mess is invading the main event.

Booker and Rick Steiner are fighting backstage. Why WCW thinks anyone cares about Rick Steiner in 1999 is beyond me.

WCW will be on QVC soon.

Video on Goldberg.

Here’s Buff…..dressed like Scott Steiner. Oh this could be good. Tenay: “I would say that’s a Buff Bagwell imitation of Big Papa Pump.” You can’t buy analysis like this people! Buff talks about partying at Penn State and how much it made him realize Michigan really sucks. He’s nailing the screech in Steiner’s voice. Buff tells us to close our eyes and picture the Big Bad Doodoo Daddy.

He was at Motel 6 watching BET last night to find more lines to steal and came up with this one: “I’m not a player. I’m just on parole a lot.” If Bagwell wants a US Title shot at Slamboree, that’s what Buff is going to get. He’ll show Bagwell that there’s no bigger liar than Scott Steiner. Flush him if you hear him. This really wasn’t as funny as it could have been but the voice was awesome.

Jerry Flynn vs. Stevie Ray

Ray hammers on him in the corner to start but gets caught by some kicks. Jerry catches one of Stevie’s kicks and turns it into an ankle lock. That goes nowhere so Jerry tries an armdrag into a cross armbreaker. Vincent offers a distraction and Horace comes in to break it up because the Black and White are a bunch of inept morons. After a beatdown on the floor, Stevie slams him down and drops a leg for two. Jerry pops up and nails a spinkick, only to get distracted by Horace so Ray can hit a bad looking Slapjack for the pin.

Rating: D-. Does anyone else find it sad that the Wolfpac is basically done but we have the Black and White stooges around, taking the whole group to beat up Jerry Flynn? Stevie just isn’t any good in the ring and it’s showing here. He’s one of those wrestlers whose offense consists of forearms to the back and a lot of shouting. Granted that’s better than Flynn who can’t even talk.

Hardcore Hak vs. Kevin Nash

Hak loads up a ladder and table before Nash’s music hits. He charges at Nash to start but Big Kev grabs a kendo stick to send Hak into the corner. Nash picks him up for a suplex onto the ladder before driving it into Hak’s ribs over and over. The table is set up in the corner but Hak reverses a whip to send Kev through it.

Some kendo stick shots put Nash down and puts the ladder on top of him for the slingshot legdrop. Nash is sent hands first into the ladder but he grabs the stick to blast Hak in the ribs. He can’t follow up though and Hak nails him a few more times to put Nash back down. A top rope swanton onto the ladder onto Nash gets two. Chastity comes in with a fire extinguisher but Nash takes it away and blasts Hak. The Jackknife through the table is enough for the pin.

Rating: D. This was a few steps ahead of the usual hardcore stuff and it’s mainly due to having less weapons than the other matches. There were only a few in this one as opposed to the dozen or so that we usually get. It also helped that there was some actual wrestling in between the spots instead of weapon shot after weapon shot. It’s still bad but it at least resembled a match.

Bam Bam Bigelow comes out and wants to keep Hardcore Night going by getting a shot at the World Title. He issues the challenge to Page “from one homey to another.” Sure why not.

This Week In WCW Motorsports.

Goldberg vs. Meng

We get a very loud Goldberg chant out of nowhere. That’s as obvious of a piped in chant as I’ve ever heard. They trade slams to start and Meng bails to the outside. Back in and Meng rakes the eyes to take over before planting Goldberg with a backbreaker for two. Goldberg pops up with a kick to the face and a powerslam of his own, only to get his eyes raked again. Meng hammers away with various chops, kicks and punches before superkicking Goldberg down for two. More punches have very little effect and Goldberg pops up with a superkick, setting up the spear and Jackhammer for the pin.

Rating: D+. Basically a longer version of the standarg Goldberg match. He had to try a bit here but Meng has gone from unstoppable killing machine to standard power heel. They did such a great job of setting him up as a one off challenger last year but now this is the best we can get. It’s a sign of the times for WCW.

Page comes out to talk about what happened on Monday and thanks people like the Masked Assassin, Jake Roberts and Dusty Rhodes for helping him out. He doesn’t think much of the fans though and tells those who got on the bandwagon to “no not suck it. Jump off!” We get some good old fashioned cheap heat when Page asks what town we’re in. He’ll give Bigelow the shot tonight, even though the fans don’t deserve it.

QVC promo.

Slamboree ad.

Randy Savage vs. Disciple

Savage has Miss Madness, Madusa and Gorgeous George with him here. Why he’s playing a face here after helping the heel Page out on Monday isn’t clear. Randy grabs an armbar to start before they shove each other around a lot. Disciple gets taken down and chinlocked before it’s back to the armbar, followed by another chinlock for a change of pace. Choking ensues and Savage drills him with an elbow to the jaw for two.

Disciple fights back with his wide range of punches, kicks and choking before dropping an elbow for two. We hit a chinlock on Savage as this isn’t quite the same level I’m used two with Macho. More punching and choking from Disciple before Savage throws him to the floor out of boredom. Savage is sent into the barricade and Disciple puts on the sleeper on the floor. Madusa makes a save and sends Disciple into the post before Savage sends him back in for the big elbow and the pin.

Rating: D-. Of all the people on WCW’s roster for Savage’s first real match back, they pick Disciple? The match was horrible and most of it was due to Savage having nothing to work with. Disciple’s entire offense was built around punching and choking which really doesn’t make for a well done match. Also, Savage needed help from the girls to beat the Disciple? Really?

WCW World Title: Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Diamond Dallas Page

Hardcore and Page is defending of course. Page slugs away to start but gets knocked out to the floor with a big right hand. Back in and Bigelow drops him throat first across the top rope, sending Page back outside for another breather. It’s time to bring in some weapons but Page dives over the top to take Bigelow back.

We take a break and come back with Bigelow knocking him down the aisle before taking Page over to the announcers’ table. He loads up a regular table but Page rolls away, sending Bigelow crashing down onto the concrete. Page sends him into the barricade a few times and they come back towards the ring with the champion in control. More weapons are brought in though and a trashcan to Page’s back gets two on the floor.

They head back inside for the top rope headbutt from Bam Bam but Page is up at two. A side slam gets the same but Page comes back with a discus lariat for a near fall of his own. The floatover DDT drops Bigelow but the referee gets bumped. Bigelow gets two off a suplex but Page low blows him for the same. Greetings From Asbury Park is countered into the Diamond Cutter….and Savage comes out to drop a big elbow on Bigelow for good measure. Page gets the easy pin.

Rating: D. I really don’t see the need for this to be a hardcore match. The Savage thing didn’t need to be there as Bigelow was out cold before Macho came out. I like Page winning matches on TV, but he needs to do something different in the ring as he’s basically having the same matches he was before save for the occasional low blow.

Overall Rating: D+. This show tried for a change and I’m sure it has nothing to do with WWF having a pilot for some show called Smackdown at the same time. It was another show that didn’t need to exist, but I definitely prefer a show with a bunch of people I kind of care about over a show with a bunch of people I barely recognize. The hardcore matches for the guys in the main event were annoying but bareable, which is more than I can usually say for this show.

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Monday Nitro – April 26, 1999: I Guess They Could Be This Crazy

Monday Nitro #186
Date: April 26, 1999
Location: Fargodome, Fargo, North Dakota
Attendance: 11,482
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tony Schiavone

Things are shaking up with less than two weeks to go before Slamboree. The two people in the upcoming World Title match have flipped sides and allegedly Flair has flipped his lid, even though he really hasn’t done much to back that up. I have a bad feeling about some of the stuff we’re going to have to sit through tonight. Let’s get to it.

In Memory of Rick Rude, which they actually spell using his real name.

We open with a recap of the major points of last week’s show with a focus on the Piper/Flair stuff and the ending with what I guess you would call a double turn.

Now we’re at the mental hospital and this can’t end well. A doctor and nurse have the most painfully scripted conversation you can imagine, talking about how Flair is treating this place like a hotel. The nurse tells the patients that there will be no Nitro tonight when Flair’s music comes on. He struts in wearing his robe and University of Florida boxers, talking about how this is his hotel. Flair watches the TV, meaning he’s watching himself in theory. He dances with the nurse who eventually walks away disgusted. I can’t say I disagree.

Opening sequence.

JJ Dillon is with Charles Robinson and says that Robinson is Vice President of WCW. Since Flair is out of action, Robinson is in charge and above the Commissioner. This is going to be a LONG night.

Nitro Girls.

Tenay is filling in for a sick Heenan. He and Tony are fine after weeks of bickering before the announce teams were split.

Here’s Piper to get things going in the arena. Piper thinks he’s in charge now with Flair gone so Randy Savage is reinstated and getting a US Title shot tonight. He mentions Page which brings out the champion to a loud chorus of boos. Piper wants Page to defend against Sting tonight but Page doesn’t seem to thrilled with the idea. Roddy goes to leave and then makes the match for 9pm sharp.

DJ Ran.

Konnan vs. Brian Adams

This is fallout from the Black and White attacking Konnan last week. After some catchphrases, Konnan quickly takes Adams into the corner for ten punches, only to get caught by an atomic drop and clothesline. An elbow to the back of the head has Konnan in trouble and a gorilla press gutbuster gets two. We hit a bad looking reverse chinlock on Konnan. Dude at least crank on it or flex a bit. Adams crotches himself while trying to jump on Konnan’s back but stops the comeback with a powerslam. Konnan comes right back with the usual and hooks the Sunrise but the NWO runs in for the DQ.

Rating: D-. What else were you expecting from something like this? Neither guy was exactly a ring general and the moves they were using ranged from sloppy to just bad looking. I guess the Black and White was trying to prove a point but this was a rather dull way to go about it.

Video on Sting.

The announcers talk about Page vs. Sting.

The Horsemen have attacked Kidman and Saturn, making the next match a handicap match.

Scott Armstrong/Steve Armstrong vs. Raven

After ranting about fat women in operas, Raven quickly escapes a double team attempt in the corner and bulldogs the brothers down. It’s already chair time with both Armstrongs taking the drop toehold onto the steel. Steve finally gets in a shot on Raven but winds up hitting his brother a few seconds later. Both guys take ten right hands in the corner but Scott finally nails a superkick to get a breather. The breather is short lived though as his second superkick hits his brother, allowing Raven to DDT Scott for two. Scott pops up and nails Raven with the chair though and actually gets the upset pin.

Rating: D+. This was short and energetic, but was there any real need to have Raven lose here? The Armstrongs are about as low level of a tag team as you can have in this company but they get a pin over a guy getting a title shot in a few weeks? This is more of the odd booking this company has been using lately.

Raven beats up the Armstrongs again post match, making the booking even more head scratching.

Flair calls Robinson to yell about Piper having power. He wants the National Guard called in to deal with this and yells at other patients to stop touching his robe. Flair hangs up and walks off with a very muscular nurse.

We look at the same package that opened the show.

Gene brings out Charles Robinson for a chat. He says that Piper has no authority here but we’ll still get Sting vs. Page tonight. This brings out Piper to call him a leprechaun, causing Robinson to slap him in the face. Security comes down to arrest Piper and Robinson fires him for good measure. The match with Flair is still on at Slamboree of course.

WCW World Title: Diamond Dallas Page vs. Sting

Page is defending. Sting is wearing white wraps on his feet and a necklace of all things. The champion is quickly shoved down to start but he comes back with a big right hand. Sting easily wins a slugout and knocks Page back to the floor for a breather. Back in and Page drives in the shoulders but Sting sends him outside again. This time Sting goes after him and rams Page face first into the announcers’ table.

Back in and the Stinger Splash connects but Page makes the ropes to avoid the Scorpion. Page bails again and gets some water before heading back inside where Sting hammers away. The champ slows things down with a hammerlock and a big clothesline. They head outside and up the aisle with Sting dropping him throat first across the barricade. A slam in the aisle has Page in trouble but the referee reminds Sting that he can only win the title in the ring.

Sting takes him back inside for some right hands in the corner but a low blow and hot shot stops Sting cold. A belly to back suplex drops Sting again but he comes back with the shoulder block and falling low blow. Page is up first though and rakes the paint off Sting’s face. Some slaps fire Sting up again but Page grabs a swinging neckbreaker for two. The champ hits a low blow of his own and chokes away in the corner.

Page wraps the knee around the post but Sting kicks him into the barricade. Now things speed up with Sting’s shots to the face and bulldog followed by the top rope splash for two. They head outside again with Sting being sent into the barricade. Page grabs something like a Diamond Cutter across the top rope but Sting comes back with ten face rams into the buckle and the last one onto the mat.

A sitout powerbomb gets two for the champion and a big lariat drops Sting again. Back up and Sting grabs a piledriver but kneels down like a tombstone for two. Now he tries a regular tombstone and finally plants him for a VERY close two. The fans are totally behind Sting here. Page comes back with a jumping floatover DDT for two more but Sting blocks the Diamond Cutter out of the corner and grabs the Death Drop for the pin and the title.

Rating: B+. This took awhile to get going but the last few minutes of this were awesome. As is almost always the case, there’s no substitute for a long, good match and that’s what we got here. This is actually a bit ahead of the Goldberg match for Page which is quite the accomplishment. Really good stuff here and the best main event style match WCW has had in forever. Also, how nice was it to not have any commercials in this?

More Flair yelling at Robinson with Ric telling him to make Sting vs. Goldberg for Slamboree. One of the inmates is now called AAA.

Cruiserweight Title: Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Psychosis

Psychosis is defending for a change. The champ grabs a headlock to start and takes Rey down to the mat, only to miss a Stinger Splash in the corner. Psychosis counters a headscissors by dropping Rey throat first across the top rope. He lifts Rey up for a powerbomb and drops his face onto the top turnbuckle in a vicious looking crash. A reversal suplex drops Rey over the top rope again and a dropkick sends him to the apron.

Psychosis charges at him but they both fall to the floor with Rey taking over for the first time. Rey’s superplex is countered into something like a falcon’s arrow. The Horsemen come out to grab the Tag Team Titles but Rey dives on both of them. Psychosis gets in a cheap shot to take over but Rey comes back with a tornado DDT out of nowhere for the pin and the title.

Rating: C-. What in the world was the point of this? Rey is now a five time Cruiserweight Champion and Psychosis’ seven days as champion is the only break from Mysterio, Kidman and Guerrera as champion since August. It’s ok to let someone else in there for a change and I don’t see why Psychosis had to lose the belt this fast. Let him beat a few low level guys to give the division a chance to breathe a bit.

The Horsemen destroy Rey post match.

Nash comes out and says he’s been told his title shot at Slamboree has been turned into Goldberg vs. Sting. That’s not cool with him but he’d like a four way tonight with Page, Goldberg and Sting, winner takes all.

Flair calls Robinson and says make the four way. He hits on the nurse a bit more and they try some amateur wrestling stuff until the nurse from earlier comes up to glare at them.

Erik Watts vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

Please make it quick. Thankfully there aren’t any weapons in sight for this one. Bigelow misses a charge in the corner and gets caught in a springboard bulldog. Erik tries a hurricanrana but winds up backdropping Bigelow instead. It’s somehow worse than it sounds. Bigelow pops up with a big clothesline followed by the Swan Dive and Greetings From Asbury Park for the pin. At least it was short.

Sting comes out sans belt but with fresh paint. He’s up for a four way tonight.

TV Title: Booker T. vs. Meng

Booker is defending. A hard shoulder puts the champ down but he comes back with a forearm and dropkick. Booker shrugs off some forearms and slams Meng a few times, only to walk into a powerslam for two. That gets Meng nowhere as Booker nails his pair of kicks but the side kick sends Meng into the referee. This brings out Stevie Ray as the ax kick takes out Meng. Booker crotches himself on the ropes after missing another kick. There’s the Tongan Death Grip but Stevie nails Meng with the slap jack, giving Booker the pin.

Rating: C-. This didn’t have enough time to go anywhere but Meng was just there to give Booker someone to beat up to retain the title. The Stevie Ray and Booker T stuff needs to go away. The team is done and Booker is on his way to becoming something big in the singles division. Stevie is just kind of dragging Booker down at this point and that’s not good.

Post match Rick Steiner of all people comes out and beats on Stevie until Booker pulls him off. Booker and Steiner yell at each other, likely setting up Booker’s next challenger.

Video on Nash.

We get a special look at Hogan’s knee surgery. Bischoff had to talk him into getting it done because Hogan wants to beat up Page.

Video on Goldberg.

Back to the hospital where Flair tells Robinson to make Steiner vs. Booker T. for Slamboree and make the main event tonight No DQ. Flair teaches some patient to dance….and here’s Scott Hall in patient clothes to throw a toothpick at Ric. Naturally, no one talks about this or ever brings it up again.

Brian Knobbs vs. Hardcore Hak vs. Horace vs. Mikey Whipwreck

This is hardcore and the winner of this gets Bigelow at the PPV. Everyone has a kendo stick and Hak stays on the floor to start. He finally gets in and all three guys beat him down with the sticks. Knobbs brings in a ladder to splash onto Hak for two. We actually take a break in this match and come back to see Horace hitting Knobbs with a Surge barrel.

Brian nails Hak with a ladder but Hak knocks him to the floor. A table is set up on the floor but Knobbs uses the weapons cart on Hak. Back in the ring and Horace kicks Mikey in the face as Knobbs chairs Hak. Mikey drops a leg onto a chair onto Brian’s head as the table has been bridged between the apron and barricade.

The Surge container comes back in and Hak slides in another table. Horace beats on Hak with the weightlifting belt on the floor as Chastity sprays someone with the fire extinguisher. Hak dives over the top but only hits table but pops right up to nail Knobbs with a stick. Not that it matters as Knobbs sends Hak to the floor and drops the ladder on Mikey for the pin.

Rating: F. When half of the people in your match have jobs because of Hulk Hogan, you can tell it’s not going to be much to see. This was the usual hardcore mess with nothing interesting save for some product placement from Surge. These are getting less and less interesting and it’s going to get even worse in the future.

US Title: Randy Savage vs. Scott Steiner

Steiner is defending and has something to say before the match. He doesn’t like a lot of what Piper does but he does like this match with Savage. Randy comes out with an unnamed woman in a gown wearing a sash like a beauty pageant contestant. Steiner wants one more stipulation though: if he wins, he gets to spend some time with George. Robinson is refereeing in most of a suit. They circle each other and do a lot of pointing for a minute or so before finally locking up. Steiner shoves him into Robinson….and that’s a DQ.

Post match the three girls strip Robinson down to his University of Florida boxers, just like Flair.

Video on George training. This is exactly what you would expect.

WCW World Title: Sting vs. Diamond Dallas Page vs. Goldberg vs. Kevin Nash

Sting is defending after having won the title earlier tonight. The match begins after a break with Page off in the crowd, leaving Goldberg and Sting to beat on Nash in the corner. Now it’s Goldberg getting double teamed before the champion has to fight off both monsters. Goldberg suplexes Nash but Sting breaks up the cover. Page is back at ringside as Goldberg has knocked both guys down. A powerslam drops Sting for two as Page still hasn’t come in.

Goldberg loads up the spear but Page breaks it up from the apron and comes in with a neckbreaker for two. Nash DIVES to break up the pin and thankfully there isn’t a quad laying on the mat as a result. Sting gets jumped from behind by Nash but comes back with right hands to the jaw. Goldberg and Page are both down until Page goes to the corner, earning himself a Stinger Splash. The other two get Splashes of their own and Sting is the only man standing.

Nash pops back to his feet and cleans house by booting them all in the face. Goldberg breaks up a Jackknife on Page before choking Page on the mat. He sends Page to the floor but gets taken down by Sting. The champ hammers away on Nash in the corner until Page comes back in with a low blow for the save. Now it’s Goldberg slamming Page but taking a Stinger Splash. Nash keeps trying to steal pins in a smart move.

There’s a side slam to Sting for two and Goldberg superkicks Page down to give Nash the same. Goldberg dives at Page but rams his head into Page’s knee to scramble his brains. Nash chokes Sting in the corner but misses a big boot. He gets caught in the Scorpion but Sting lets go, only to get speared down by Goldberg. The Jackhammer plants Sting but Savage breaks it up for no apparent reason. Savage throws Page some knuckles to knock Nash out before a Diamond Cutter (Nash turned to the side so it was half Cutter and half neckbreaker) gives Page the belt back.

Rating: C+. Dang it’s a good thing Savage joined up with Page. We almost had more than two top good guys in the whole company (I don’t think Piper counts when seemingly no one can stand him). This was energetic with Nash doing more work than I’ve seen him do in years. Page winning the title back is odd but it’s pretty tame given some of the stuff WCW has done in recent weeks.

Page runs through the crowd to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. Much like last week, the wrestling is more than good enough to make this a watchable show. However, the stories are so out there that they drags things back down. Basically we’re right back where we were when Nitro came on the air last week, other than Flair being in a mental hospital with Scott Hall. Mysterio has the title back, Page is still champion, and we’re still looking at Page vs. Nash for the title at Slamboree.

That’s why these title changes make me shake my head at WCW. They had an idea that could have drawn a good rating with Page vs. Sting and it makes sense to put it on right when Raw starts. What doesn’t make sense is giving that match about fifty minutes of build. That could have easily headlined a big PPV but instead they decided to give it less than an hour?

If that’s not enough, we have a big gimmick match for the title which also could have headlined a PPV, so it gets about ninety minutes of build and most people probably didn’t hear about it. This impatience is maddening when you could build this stuff up for weeks instead of minutes. They’re pouring away what could be millions of dollars in PPV money for the sake of maybe beating Raw for one night. The fact that this show had a bigger gap than the week before or the week after should have been a hint but WCW never seemed to learn.

Let’s go back to something mentioned earlier: Ric Flair is currently in a mental hospital and happened to run into Scott Hall. Nothing is mentioned of this again, Scott didn’t say a word, and I highly doubt we’ll see Scott again for several months. That’s not something you should be able to just see and walk past, but WCW apparently doesn’t feel the need to address this and thinks we’ll just kind of go along with it. It comes off like a joke and that’s not the kind of thing you should be seeing on national TV in a segment that is stupid already.

Overall this was a good show, but the stupid stuff is REALLY stupid and drags down the rest of the show. This also needs to be an hour less which is standard for almost all wrestling shows. They just do not need to be three hours and the extra hour always hurts things. You make this two hours and have Flair at the arena in a suit instead of being in a hospital and the show is about twice as good.

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Monday Nitro – April 19, 1999: WCW Goes Off The Cliff

Monday Nitro #185
Date: April 19, 1999
Location: O’Connell Center, Gainsville, Florida
Attendance: 8,567
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan

We’re getting closer to Slamboree and the main event is set with Page defending against Nash. Other than that we have the further exploits of the NWO as things fall apart with Hogan nowhere in sight. Savage and Sting are still running around and feuding with Flair so it’s hard to say what’s coming tonight. Let’s get to it.

We open with Goldberg arriving and carrying a briefcase. He says it’s him vs. Page for the title tonight.

Ricki Rachman and DJ Ran do their thing.

Nitro Girls.

Scott Armstrong/Steve Armstrong vs. Dean Malenko/Chris Benoit

This should be good. Benoit and Scott get things going and of course Charles Robinson is referee. They speed things up to start with Scott ducking a chop but getting taken down with a very crisp armdrag. A quick tag brings in Steve who cleans house and stomps away on Benoit. The Horsemen get Steve out to the floor though and the triple teaming is on. Back in and Malenko nails a low dropkick to the side of Steve’s head and the stomping continues.

Benoit takes his head off with a clothesline for two as a LOUD Goldberg chant starts up. Malenko comes back in and hammers away in the corner before Anderson helps with even more cheating. Robinson allows the Horsemen to change without a tag to Arn’s approval. Benoit finally charges into a boot but still won’t allow the tag off to Scott. Dean comes back in but walks into a double clothesline, finally setting up the hot tag. Scott comes in and everything breaks down. Dean jumps over Scott in the corner and powerbombs him down into the Cloverleaf for the submission.

Rating: C+. This was the best opening match they’ve had in a good while. The Armstrongs are guys that can wrestle with anyone so if you give them a pair of technicians like Malenko and Benoit it’s bound to be good. More importantly than that though, the brothers kept working the whole time they were getting squashed. It’s so annoying to see someone just laying on the mat instead of trying to get the tag or doing anything other than just laying around.

Georgia, the woman that gave Flair papers that he signed without looking at them on Thunder, gives them to Piper. Roddy looks very pleased.

Opening sequence.

Savage and Gorgeous George arrive but Doug Dillinger won’t let them in. Piper comes up and says he’s the Commissioner so they need to be let in. Dillinger reluctantly agrees.

Gene brings out DDP for a chat. Page starts by wishing Hogan the best with his knee surgery. The fans are already chanting for Goldberg. Page says Goldberg needs to get focused like he’s been. Both guys know what it’s like to grab the brass ring because Page is World Champion right now.

Page sees a lot of Goldberg in himself and there’s nothing he would like more than to put the title on the line tonight….but that’s not going to happen. This brings out Goldberg who gets right in Page’s face. Apparently Page agrees to put the title on the line tonight. Goldberg’s music hit and he was out of the ring in less than a minute. So why did Page say no in the first place if he would agree that fast?

Piper is in the back with David Flair and says Ric needs help. They talk about him being put under observation for 72 hours and David agrees before signing the papers Piper was given earlier.

Page comes up to Gene in the back and confirms the title is on the line. Gene isn’t done yet though and shows us the clip from Spring Stampede of Page injuring Hogan. We don’t actually see Page’s reaction to it or anything, but why would that be interesting?

Cruiserweight Title: Psychosis vs. Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Kidman vs. Blitzkrieg

Mysterio is defending and this is one fall to a finish. The fans really odn’t seem to like Psychosis or Blitzkrieg. We cut to the front row and see a man all in black with a mohawk hair cut and jewelery on his fingers that look like claws. Tony recognizes him as Alex Wright, which is very impressive detective work on his part as Wright looks completely different and is wearing big sunglasses.

It’s a big brawl to start with only Juvy and Psychosis left standing. Blitzkrieg avoids a charge to send Psychosis hard into the post. Juvy loads up a powerbomb on Psychosis for a springboard seated senton from Rey. Guerrera backdrops Mysterio out to the floor and holds up Blitzkrieg for a missile dropkick from Psychosis. Blitzkrieg escapes another powerbomb attempt and causes Juvy to accidentally hit a top rope Fameasser on Psychosis.

Rey is back in with a split legged moonsault to Juvy but Psychosis takes over and throw Guerrera into the air for a big crash. Blitzkrieg and Rey knock the other two to the floor before hitting a pair of Asai moonsaults. Back in and Blitzkrieg hits some standing flips onto Rey for two as Juvy and Psychosis are trying to get back in. Guerrera is back up first with a springboard missile dropkick to Blitzkrieg’s back, leaving him alone with Rey.

A quick hurricanrana puts Guerrera down and a slingshot splash gets two. Psychosis and Rey take turns breaking up pins by hitting each other in the face. Things settle down with Juvy bulldogging Rey for two before calling for the Juvy Driver. Instead it’s a kind of reverse DDT but Psychosis comes in with a top rope splash for two on the champion. Mysterio’s top rope bulldog puts Psychosis down and we have to take a break.

Back with Juvy hitting a huge dive onto Blitzkrieg and Psychosis. Rey goes outside as well but Psychosis pops up and dives onto all three of them. Back in and Rey powerbombs Juvy for two but Psychosis makes a save. Blitzkrieg busts out a very quick Figure Four to Psychosis, only to have Juvy make the save and drop a guillotine legdrop on Psychosis for two. Juvy powerbombs Blitzkrieg but Rey gets the cover for two. Mysterio hurricanranas Juvy off the top and Psychosis steals two of his own.

Blitzkrieg can’t get a jawbreaker on Juvy so Rey dropkicks Guerrera to the floor instead. Rey makes the mistake of posing instead of covering, allowing Juvy to try a powerbomb out of the corner. That’s fine with Rey as he hurricanranas Guerrera again. Juvy pops back up and snaps Mysterio across the top for two more. Psychosis clotheslines Juvy to the floor but Blitzkrieg kicks him in the face.

A slam sets up the Phoenix Splash for two on Psychosis but this time it’s Juvy making the save and Juvy Drivering Blitzkrieg for two. Rey comes back in and hurricanranas Guerrera out to the floor. Psychosis breaks up a Blitzkrieg superplex attempt and drops the guillotine legdrop for the pin and the title in a shocker.

Rating: B+. WHAT A MATCH! I don’t ever remember a cruiserweight match going this long (over twenty one minutes) and there is something going on for the entirety of the time. Usually there’s the period where things cool down but they never reached that point here. Psychosis winning is a big surprise and the match was very entertaining. Great stuff.

Gene brings out Flair for a chat. Ric, in a University of Florida shirt, seems very happy to be in Gainesville. He talks about students thinking they can out drink him and offers to buy each one of them a drink. Before he can get any further he’s interrupted by Roddy Piper. Ric wants to know why Piper always has to ruin his good time but Piper cuts him off and says Flair is becoming the Dennis Rodman of WCW.

He brings up Flair signing papers and offering to buy kids drinks. Somehow this makes him insane and unfit to be President of WCW. Piper is treating this like something serious instead of over the top like it should be. Flair starts dancing and throws his shoes into the crowd. Roddy brings up Flair handcuffing himself to the ropes to fight Bischoff from a few months back so Flair strips off his clothes to reveal Florida boxers.

Ric says his first crazy thing and says he’s President of the United States. Robinson brings out Flair’s robe as Piper has Gene read the papers. Basically they say Flair is nuts and that he’s out of office pending a review of his competence. Flair fires Piper and gives Florida the National Championship from Tennessee.

It’s time for more dancing so Piper says that the paper Flair signed last week made Flair vs. Nash (who went to the University of Tennessee in a nice touch) tonight. So he’s crazy but allowed to wrestle? Anderson faints in the corner for a few seconds but Flair makes himself vs. Piper for the Presidency at Slamboree and if Piper loses he’s fired.

This segment was a mess and really doesn’t make sense. The problem comes down to Flair not being insane until just now, and it’s a stretch even at this point. Anderson and Heenan made it clear that Flair taking off his clothes and spending a fortune is Flair being himself. That’s very true and we’ve seen him do exactly that for well over ten years.

Yeah Flair has been a bit out there with stuff like signing papers without looking, but going from that to having him committed in four days is a really big jump for this story. It makes the whole thing seem stupid and they could have gotten to the Piper vs. Flair match for control without it. The fact that this is setting up Roddy Piper vs. Ric Flair in a major match on PPV makes things even worse as you can almost hear the fans groan when Piper is mentioned anymore.

The Black and White tells Konnan they’re looking for Nash but Konnan says he has nothing to do with Nash anymore. This earns him a beatdown. Konnan was scheduled to fight for the US Title later in the night.

DJ Ran and Nitro Girls.

The announcers hype up the World Title match and they actually have a graphic for it. The shot of the belt on Page’s shoulder looks horrible as he’s not even touching it.

Brian Knobbs vs. Hardcore Hak

This is a garbage can match or something like that. Brian hammers Hak with a can as he comes in but Chastity slides in some extra weapons for them to use. We get a Pit Stop for old times’ sake and Hak is sent out to the floor. Hak sends him into the post and a cameraman goes down. It’s already table time but Knobbs nails him in the back with a chair.

Hak comes back with a ladder as you can barely see the mat at this point. There’s no wrestling in between these spots. Hak bulldogs him onto the ladder and sets up the table in the middle of the ring. He misses a Swanton though and mostly breaks the table to give Brian a two count. We get the Terry Funk spinning ladder spot to put Hak down but Chasitity takes Knobbs’ kendo stick away. Not that it matters as a pair of trashcan shots is enough to pin Hak.

Rating: D-. Remember the good tag match and the really good four way? This was nothing like those matches. As is usually the case with these things, the best part of it was it only ran about seven minutes. On the other hand, I could have spent those seven minutes doing something more constructive, like ripping my fingernails out with rusty pliers.

More DJ Ran because WCW doesn’t understand wrestling fans.

Nitro Girls.

Randy Savage has a present for Gorgeous George: Madusa, who is here to train her for Slamboree.

Nash comes in to see the Black and White and ask about what happened with Konnan. Stevie says they know what Nash has been doing and won’t be taking it anymore. Nash leaves, saying the team doesn’t want this. They’re going to send Norton to take care of Steiner tonight.

Buff Bagwell vs. Disco Inferno

Buff talks about how bad Scott Steiner thinks he is and rips off his catchphrases. Disco stomps him down in the corner to start but gets caught by a clothesline. Bagwell chokes Disco with his own shirt before working on a wristlock. A dropkick puts Inferno on the floor and Buff does his strut.

Disco comes back in and is quickly hiptossed right back to the floor. He tries to get back in again and actually shows some intelligence by snapping Buff’s throat across the top rope. Disco starts going after the neck as we stop to look at Alex Wright again. Bagwell avoids a middle rope elbow and makes his quick comeback, only to get crotched on the top. The Last Dance is countered and Buff tries (and fails) a running Blockbuster for the pin.

Rating: D+. This was another good win for Bagwell as they actually seem to be building up a young guy for a change. I can’t imagine it’s for anything more than feeding him to Steiner but it’s nice while it lasts. Bagwell really needs to stick with the middle rope version of the Blockbuster though as it looks about 8000% better.

Here’s Scott Steiner with a group of women because Godfather was a hot act around this time. After some catchphrases, Steiner gets right to it with talking down Bagwell and mentioning Buff’s history as a male stripper. He goes on about it for awhile and says the NWO made Bagwell. The fans chant steroids and there’s no Norton as promised by the Black and White. Not only are the boring and losers, but they can’t tell the truth about their sneak attacks announced on national TV. What is the world coming to?

Video on Gorgeous George vs. Charles Robinson.

Nitro Girls.

DJ Ran for the third or so time tonight.

Recap of the Flair/Piper stuff from earlier.

Kidman vs. Raven

Raven starts off aggressively but gets taken down by a headscissors. He pops back up and suddenly feels like trying a powerbomb. Kidman is lucky that his opponents always want to use that move even though they never do otherwise. After the faceplant, Raven sends Kidman out to the floor and throws in a chair. The drop toehold sends Kidman face first into the steel and Raven drops a leg onto the chair onto Kidman’s head for good measure. Kidman shoves Raven off the top but the Shooting Star hits the chair. The Horsemen come in for the DQ, even though Raven matches are supposed to be non-title.

Mysterio makes the save for his partner and the Horsemen run. Saturn decks Mysterio but gets sent down with a headscissors. Rey gets superkicked but Kidman powerbombs Saturn down. Raven Evenflows Kidman but the Horsemen run back in for the big beatdown.

More of Piper/Flair.

US Title: Scott Steiner vs. Scott Norton

So apparently the Black and White can just make US Title matches at their whim. Steiner is defending of course. After the champion finishes posing, the battle of clubbing forearms begin. Norton runs the champ down with some shoulders and a big clothesline sends him outside. More stalling ensues until Norton drags him back into the ring for some right hands in the corner. Steiner finally sends him to the floor and then into the barricade.

Back in and Steiner gets his required steroids chant. Steiner charges into a boot in the corner and Norton hammers away before getting two off a side slam. Norton loads up the shoulder breaker but the referee gets bumped. A low blow and belly to belly suplex retain Steiner’s title. Steiner’s feet on the ropes helped too.

Rating: D. I had a feeling this wasn’t going to be much of a power brawl. Norton was wrestling like a face here and it worked on a kind of weird level. Steiner’s mega push continues as his in ring ability continues to deteriorate every single week. Granted putting him in there with a one dimensional guy like Norton wasn’t the best idea.

DJ Ran AGAIN. We get it already.

Kevin Nash vs. Ric Flair

Before the match, Nash promises to get revenge on Page for Hogan. Naturally Robinson, with what looks like a Horsemen sticker on his shirt, is refereeing. Nash shoves Flair down before the bell and Flair is ready to go. Flair tries some shoulder blocks to as much success as you would expect. Back up and Nash knees him into the corner and nails the backdrop. Nash even mocks Flair slicking back his hair as Ric bails to the floor.

Naitch slows things down a bit so Nash busts out a headlock of all things. They trade shots in the corner and there’s another backdrop to Flair. A big shot in the corner gives us the Flair Flop and there’s the framed elbow. Anderson finally gets involved by tripping up Nash and helping Flair crotch him against the post. Back in and Anderson just gets in the ring to help Flair double team. We get the old “how much time” bit from Flair and Nash goes down to a low blow.

Flair hammers away in the corner while calling Nash Tennessee. Anderson interferes again but Nash comes back with a right hand and the side slam. Flair heads to the apron and gets clotheslined out to the floor. For some reason he tries to come back in off the top and you know what’s coming. Anderson tries to come in but gets kicked in the face for his efforts. There go the straps and Flair gets powerbombed, sending Robinson to the floor instead of counting. Gorgeous George comes out and takes his referee shirt to count the pin on Flair. Because that’s how WCW works anymore.

Rating: C-. It was Flair vs. Nash so you knew it was going to be at least watchable. The overbooking made sense here and Robinson just walking out was a nice touch. The ending on the other hand was stupid but exactly what you would expect from WCW at this point: someone just deciding they’re a referee and having their pin count. I mean, people can make US Title matches so why not this?

Post match Flair is taken out on a stretcher by people in white coats. Yep, they’re really doing this. Piper shows up to talk some trash as Flair is loaded into the van. Somehow Anderson doesn’t get what’s going on.

Dusty Rhodes joins commentary for no apparent reason.

WCW World Title: Diamond Dallas Page vs. Goldberg

Page is defending of course. The referee gets shoved down and we’re ready to go. Page charges at Goldberg and gets shoved down as well. Back up and Page is thrown to the floor where he stops to take a breather. He gets back in and tries the Diamond Cutter but is quickly sent back to the floor. A leg trip doesn’t even get one on Goldberg who hits a kind of AA into a cross armbreaker, sending Page into the ropes.

Page’s shoulder block has no effect and the spear connects out of nowhere. He goes to pick Page up for the Jackhammer but the champ sends him face first into the middle buckle instead. A swinging neckbreaker gets two for Page and a belly to belly suplex gets the same. Goldberg gets caught in a front facelock but he powers up into a kind of powerslam for two. Another Diamond Cutter attempt is countered into another powerslam and Goldberg is getting frustrated.

Page neckbreakers him for two but misses the discus lariat. A superkick puts Page into the corner and Goldberg loads up the spear but the champ is smart enough to just stay right where he is. Goldberg tries the spear anyway and hits the buckle. The Diamond Cutter connects but Goldberg kicks him off hard enough to send him onto the referee. Page loads up a foreign object but stops to use the referee as a shield for the spear.

The Jackhammer connects but there’s no referee. Page gets up and nails Goldberg with the foreign object to knock him out to the floor. He loads up the steps next to Goldberg and crushes the ankle with a chair. The referee wakes up and tries to stop Page, earning him a right hand to the face. Page loads up the Figure Four around the post but Nash makes the save for no apparent reason other than the script says so. He helps Goldberg into the ring but Page nails Nash with the belt to end the show.

Rating: C+. This was actually a good match until the screwy ending. These two have some solid chemistry together and can put on a good match with the right amount of time. Goldberg kicking out of the Diamond Cutter as strong as he did was a surprise and the ending was…..well I’ll get back to that. The match was good though.

Overall Rating: C+. You know if you just go by the wrestling, this was one of the best Nitros in a very long time. The Cruiserweight Title match was outstanding and the main event was solid too. You couple that with some other good to watchable stuff in between and write off the non-wrestling that was Hak vs. Knobbs and you have one heck of a show.

Unfortunately this heck of a show has an 800lb gorilla right in the middle of it and a 300lb orangutan at the end. We’ll start with the slightly better one first. Page and Nash’s double turn is acceptable as Nash has basically been a face for months now and Page….yeah it really doesn’t work. Much like the Flair stuff, it was just setting down its roots when they jumped it forward to the end goal.

One of WCW’s biggest problems at the moment is its lack of top faces. There’s Sting, Nash, Piper (oh joy) and in theory Savage, though he’s just a glorified manager right now. Nash becoming the top guy is fine enough, but it brings up the obvious question: if he wins the title, why should I believe he’s going to hang onto it? It may sound like a stupid question but the Fingerpoke was less than four months prior to this. It’s not out of the question.

That leaves us with the big problem with this show: Ric Flair, the fourteen time World Heavyweight Champion and the President of WCW was put in a white van and taken away to a mental hospital after apparently thinking he was President of the United States due to what could easily be written off as a slip of the tongue. Aside from what was just mentioned, the fact that it sets up Piper vs. Flair in 1999, how out of character it is for Flair and how much of a stretch this is, it’s not even a well told story.

From what we can tell, David Flair and Piper decided to have Flair institutionalized because he signed a single contract for a match without looking at it. Yeah it’s stupid but it’s not really grounds for being institutionalized. Just writing that and reading it back makes me realize it’s even worse. Ric Flair is being put in a mental hospital. Let it sink in for a second. This is a really bad idea and unfortunately it’s the first step off a cliff for WCW. Things were getting stupid before, but now they’re flying into the abyss.

Somehow though, the show was actually good for the most part. The Flair/Piper stuff is horrible but it’s only a part of what is otherwise a really good show. That’s what makes WCW so frustrating: they have the tools and ability to have a good product, but they do things like have a DJ in the arena (because I guess a professional wrestling show just isn’t entertaining enough) and the hardcore nonsense drags all the good stuff down.

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