Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania X (2022 Redo): You Don’t Notice The Problems

Wrestlemania X
Date: March 20, 1994
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 18,065
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler

If there is one thing that WWE does well, it is big milestone episodes where they are able to look back on what they have done before and praise themselves for it. The good thing is that this show has a lot going for it on its own, including the legendary ladder match and the two World Title matches, along with a second instant classic. Let’s get to it.

We open with a look back at the first Wrestlemania (egads it’s amazing how far they have come, even in nine years), with some awesome old school clips.

The opening sequence is just a look at the World Title participants without so much as a voiceover.

Little Richard and the Harlem Boys Choir sing America the Beautiful in a great performance.

Vince and Lawler explain the WWF Title situation, which is going to require some backstory. Lex Luger and Bret Hart were co-winners of the Royal Rumble, so both of them are getting title shots (since the triple threat wasn’t a big thing yet). Luger won a coin toss, meaning he will face Yokozuna for the WWF Title first, while Bret will face his brother Owen Hart (had Bret won the coin toss, Luger would have faced Crush). Bret will then face the winner of Luger vs. Yokozuna, no matter what happens in Bret vs. Owen.

We recap Bret vs. Owen, which is all about Owen wanting to get out from his brother’s shadow. Bret is one of the top stars in the WWF but Owen feels he is even better. They tried to win the Tag Team Titles together but the injured Bret wouldn’t tag out, costing them the titles. Owen turned on him as a result, which felt completely justified as Bret wouldn’t listen and tried to do everything himself. This is Owen’s big chance to prove that he’s a star in his own right and back up everything he has said about Bret for months now.

Bret Hart vs. Owen Hart

Dig that entrance where the X in the Wrestlemania logo slides apart, plus the entrance being opposite the hard camera as only MSG can make work. They go straight to the lockup, with Owen celebrating almost immediately. Bret wrestles him down and this time Owen has to go to the ropes for a break. Back up and Owen takes him down but this time Bret sends him outside to escape.

Owen slaps him in the face and then grabs a headlock, only to get reversed into a hammerlock. A rollup out of the corner gives Bret two and he armdrags Owen into an armbar. That’s broken up as well so Bret grabs a monkey flip, followed by a clothesline to the floor as things pick up for the first time. Owen teases leaving so Bret throws him back inside and hits a slap of his own, setting up another arm crank.

That’s broken up as well and Owen hits a spinwheel kick as neither can keep an advantage for that long. They head outside with Owen ramming him back first into the post. A backbreaker stays on the back and we hit a camel clutch as Owen plays Iron Sheik. Bret gets out (I knew he was better than Backlund) but charges into a belly to belly for two. Owen’s middle rope spinning crossbody connects and it’s off to the reverse chinlock with a knee in Bret’s back.

With that not working well enough, Owen tosses him to the floor, followed by a bridging German suplex for two back inside. It’s time to crank things up with a jumping Tombstone but instead of covering, Owen goes up to miss a top rope headbutt. Bret fights up and hits a clothesline, followed by a Russian legsweep for two. The middle rope elbow gets the same but Owen comes back with the enziguri.

Owen tries his own Sharpshooter but Bret counters, only to have his own version countered as well. A cradle gives Owen two with the kickout sending him outside. Lawler freaks out again, as he is glorious in praising Owen while yelling about Bret. A dive to the floor drops Owen again but Bret bangs up his knee on the landing. Back in and Owen goes right for the knee rather than letting Bret have a chance to sucker him in, including wrapping the leg around the post over and over.

Something like an Indian Deathlock has Bret down again so we hit the LET’S GO BRET chant. There’s something so simple about a chant like that but it just feels like wrestling. Owen goes a bit more classic with the Figure Four but Bret turns it over, sending Owen straight to the ropes. Back up and Bret whips him chest first into the buckle, setting up a bulldog for two.

A heck of a piledriver gives Bret two more, though it seems to tweak his knee a bit. Said knee is fine enough to hit a top rope superplex (Bret always made those look good) for another near fall as Bret is getting frustrated. Bret grabs a sleeper so Owen goes for the ropes and kicks him low to escape. Owen slaps on the Sharpshooter, which is reversed into Bret’s version, which sends Owen straight to the ropes. Back up and Bret gets whipped into the corner but gets up a boot to stop a charge. Bret tries a victory roll but Owen sits down on him for the clean pin at 20:22.

Rating: A. Absolute classic here and still probably the best opening match ever. What made this work so well, in addition to the great wrestling, is the story that they were telling. Bret was going as hard as he could but he couldn’t beat the motivated Owen, who had everything riding on this. If Owen lost here, he had nowhere to go and would go even nuttier, which was enough to get him past his brother. I’ve seen this one a ton of times and it is still great every time. Check this out again in case you haven’t seen it in awhile.

In the back, Owen is VERY happy with his win and says he told us all. This is more pride than anything else as Owen is finally validated. He even praises Bret a bit because while he still loves his brother, he had to win. That’s a great little detail and something you don’t see in a lot of matches and stories.

Wrestlemania II was in three cities and had celebrities!

Sy Sperling, the President of the Hair Club for Men, presents Howard Finkel in a toupee.

Doink The Clown/Dink The Clown vs. Luna Vachon/Bam Bam Bigelow

Makes sense to put this here as nothing serious should be following the opener. Bigelow wastes no time in dropkicking Doink down to start but misses a backsplash. Doink avoids a charge and works on an armbar, which lasts as long as you would expect. It’s off to Luna vs. Dink, the latter of whom starts with a quick spank. Luna chokes him on the middle rope, only to miss a charge on the ropes. Dink’s elbow drop gets two so Luna kicks him in the stomach. Dink drives her into the corner but misses something off the top for a crash.

This time it’s Luna going up, where she misses a splash (which got some height) of her own. The double tag brings in Bigelow and Doink, with Bigelow clotheslining him out to the floor in a heap. For some reason Dink is able to knock Bigelow down to his knees but Luna chases him back outside. Back in and Doink tries a sunset flip on Bigelow, which goes about as well as you would expect. Doink is fine enough to hit a jumping DDT on Bigelow, setting a missed top rope Whoopee Cushion. Bigelow knocks Dink off the apron and the top rope headbutt finishes Doink at 6:07.

Rating: D+. What else were you expecting here? There is only so much that you can get out of having a match mostly played for comedy, though having Bigelow and Luna win in such dominant fashion was a bit weird. At least they didn’t give it too much time though and it’s hard to get that annoyed at a match that is pure filler.

Post match Dink goes after Bigelow but gets taken down by Luna. The splash misses though and the clowns stand tall enough.

A Bill Clinton impersonator is here, complete with Jack Tunney next to him and IRS behind him.

Wrestlemania III was a huge show.

Randy Savage vs. Crush

This is billed as Falls Count Anywhere, which is true, but it has a twist to it, in that you get a fall but then your opponent has sixty seconds to get back in the ring. Yokozuna destroyed Crush a few months ago and Crush accused Savage, his former friend, of not checking on him. As a result, Crush beat the heck out of him, sending Savage into a rage, costing him a broadcasting job.

Now it’s time for revenge, so Savage charges at him in the aisle. That earns Savage a throat first drop onto the barricade for a fall on the floor less than a minute after the bell. Savage falls down at ringside but makes it back in with two seconds left. Crush ties him in the Tree of Woe and hammers away before going over to manager Mr. Fuji to get some salt. As you might expect, Savage gets out and knocks it into Crush’s face, setting up a top rope ax handle to the back.

The top rope elbow connects but Savage is smart enough to throw Crush outside for the pin, meaning the sixty second countdown is on again. Crush makes it back in with a second to go (and Fuji pouring water on his face/pushing him inside), meaning that was the most incredible elbow Savage ever hit.

Back in and Crush starts hammering on the back as they go to the floor again. They fight into the back with Crush being sent face first into a door, where they find some scaffolding. Savage gets the pin, but stops to tie Crush upside down in the scaffolding. Apparently never a Boy Scout, the rope slips and Crush falls down on the floor, but Savage gets the win anyway at 9:03.

Rating: C. This was a weird one as they mixed up a couple of stipulations, leaving us with a match that didn’t really work. Waiting for almost a minute after each fall made things drag a lot and that isn’t how such a grudge match should have gone. Savage out for vengeance in a wild weapons brawl should have been easy, but they twisted things around a bit here and it only kind of worked, mainly when they weren’t in the long rest periods. This would be Savage’s last match for the WWE, and it wasn’t a great way to go out.

Todd Pettengill is with the Clinton impersonator, who talks about how he has loved wrestling for years. IRS pops in for some tax jokes.

Video on Fan Fest, the ancestor of Axxess.

Randy Savage celebrates with the fans.

Randy Savage won the WWF Title in a tournament at Wrestlemania IV.

Women’s Title: Lelani Kai vs. Alundra Blayze

Kai, who challenged for the title at the first Wrestlemania, is challenging here as the company decided it cared about the Women’s Title again. The camera stays rather zoomed in to start before zooming out to show Kai running her over. Kai picks Blayze up for some choking and throws her down as Lawler talks about how much better Kai is at everything.

The yet to be named hurricanrana gives Blayze two but Kai tosses her outside. Back in and a butterfly suplex gives Kai two as this is one sided so far. Blayze fights back with some kicks and a snap suplex is good for two. Lawler suggests that Blayze looks like a horse before the German suplex retains the title at 3:27.

Rating: C-. Nothing to see here, though Kai getting in that much offense was quite the surprise. The problem is that the division was Blayze, Bull Nakano and maybe one or two other women, which didn’t leave many options. Blayze was good, but there was only so much they could do in about three minutes with a cold challenger.

The Fabulous Moolah and Nikolai Volkoff are watching.

Roddy Piper used a fire extinguisher at Wrestlemania V.

Shawn Michaels interrupts an interview with Rhonda Shear, a USA TV host, but Burt Reynolds interrupts and gets the girl. Reynolds seems to have no idea why he’s here.

Tag Team Titles: Men on a Mission vs. Quebecers

The Quebecers, with Johnny Polo (better known for his bird themes such as Scotty Flamingo and Raven), are defending but rapping Oscar is here with Men on a Mission. The champs jump the rather large challengers before the bell to start fast. Mo gets knocked outside but Mable runs the champs over with a double clothesline.

We settle down to Mo crossbodying Pierre for two and Mable drops the leg to make it worse. It’s back to Mo, who gets taken into the corner this time so the stomping can begin. Mo gets sent outside for a dive from Pierre for two back inside. A double hot shot gets the same as Lawler thinks Mabel has gone off to find food. Mo finally scores with a running flip attack but the referee doesn’t see the tag to Mabel.

Pierre misses a top rope legdrop though and the hot tag brings in Mabel to wreck the normal sized humans. A missed charge slows him down and the Quebecers manage a double suplex (Polo approves) to drop the giant. The Cannonball gets two but Mabel is back up with a spinwheel…well leg as his foot didn’t come close to Jacques’ face. An assisted splash crushes Jacques so Polo distracts the referee. Oscar breaks that up as Pierre hits Jacques by mistake. Another assisted splash hits Pierre on the floor and that’s a countout at 7:45.

Rating: C. This wasn’t the best match as Mabel is so big that you can only do so much with him and Mo just wasn’t very good. The Quebecers were a good team but they weren’t exactly miracle workers. Men on a Mission was a fun team just because of how bright and colorful they were, but you’re only able to get so far with this kind of a matchup.

Wrestlemania VI was the Ultimate Challenge, which proved that no one was unbeatable. In other words, pay no attention to that loser about to sign with WCW.

Donnie Wahlberg (of New Kids on the Block) and Rhonda Shear are the ring announcer and timekeeper.

WWF Title: Yokozuna vs. Lex Luger

Luger is challenging and Mr. Perfect is the surprise guest referee (in a referee shirt and matching pants for a different, yet still perfect, look). Yokozuna has Jim Cornette and Mr. Fuji with him for quite the numbers advantage. Vince is doing everything that he can to make fans care about Luger, even calling him the embodiment of the spirit of America. Maybe calling him the embodiment of the spirit of someone who won the WWF Title at some point might help.

They glare at each other to start until Luger starts hammering away. The right hands put Yokozuna on the floor but Luger tosses him back inside, actually having learned his lesson from Summerslam. Back in and Luger goes up (Huh?) for a high crossbody (HUH?) for two, setting up the jumping elbow (which actually connects for a change) for two more. Luger tries a slam but Yokozuna falls onto him for the crash, meaning it’s time to start the slow beatdown.

Yokozuna pulls off the turnbuckle pad and we hit the nerve hold, which means putting his hand on Luger’s neck and not even pretending to squeeze. Luger starts fighting up and elbows his way out, only to get knocked down again. Some hard chops to the neck set up another nerve hold, which goes on for another minute plus before Luger is sent outside. Back in and we hit the nerve hold AGAIN, with Luger giving a look of boredom rather than pain, as this match is so far beyond dead that it’s actively turning into a zombie so it can die again.

Luger fights up and gets knocked down again, setting up the fourth nerve hold in a match that is just over eleven minutes long so far. That one is broken up as well but Yokozuna hits a belly to belly suplex. A missed charge sends Yokozuna into the exposed buckle though and Luger makes the clothesline comeback to put Yokozuna down.

Now the slam works (Lawler: “THAT WAS A HIPTOSS! THAT WAS A HIPTOSS!”) and Luger hits the loaded forearm. Mr. Fuji and Cornette come in but get decked, only to have Mr. Perfect not count with the two of them still in the ring. Luger yells at Perfect and shoves him, which is enough for the DQ at 14:38.

Rating: D-. This was absolutely dreadful and one of the worst major Wrestlemania matches of all time. Yokozuna could barely move and had to go to the same lazy hold four times in less than fifteen minutes. I know he’s huge and can’t move much, but maybe that means it is time for him to figure out something else. That didn’t help things, but it also exposed the other issue with Luger’s big push.

In addition to Yokozuna being terrible, Luger looked AWFUL here, as he did almost nothing but right hands and clotheslines. There are things you can do with an opponent the size of Yokozuna but Luger went as basic as possible, just like he did at Summerslam. At the same time, Luger looked bored out there with almost no charisma or anything close to it. Neither guy was putting in much effort here and it showed badly, as the fans calling the whole thing BS at the end being rather telling.

We go to the back where Mr. Perfect says you can’t touch a referee or you get disqualified. Luger comes in to yell at him but referees separate them. This was supposed to be a long term followup on Luger knocking Perfect out cold last year at Wrestlemania but Perfect left the company before it could go anywhere.

Vince and Lawler talk about the match, with Vince having to acknowledge the BS chants.

There was a blindfold match at Wrestlemania VII. THAT’S the match you pick from that show?

Harvey Wippleman yells at Howard Finkel about being a stupid New Yorker who has big ears and fake hair. He doesn’t like Fink’s suit either and rips it up, so Fink fights back. Cue Adam Bomb to go after Fink, but Earthquake of all people makes the save.

Earthquake vs. Adam Bomb

Powerslam and the Earthquake finishes Bomb at 34 seconds. I’m going to assume this was a time issue.

Jim Cornette isn’t happy with how the match with Luger went but all that matters is who has the belt. He loved Mr. Perfect’s officiating and remember that BOTH PARTIES agreed on the referee choice. As for Bret Hart, what matters is whether he makes it through the match with his career intact. Bret already lost to his brother and has a bad knee but he still has to face this monster. Cornette knew how to hype someone up like few others could.

Wrestlemania VIII had an Undertaker….something. No match or opponent is mentioned, but he sure was there.

Intercontinental Title: Razor Ramon vs. Shawn Michaels

Ramon is defending and the title is hanging above the ring, because this is the ladder match. Ring announcer: “There are NO RULES.” He then explains how you win the title, which sounds a lot like rules. This is fallout from Shawn being suspended while still champion and being stripped of the title. Ramon won it, but then Shawn came back and said he was the real champion. Therefore, hang them both above the ring and see who can pull them down. Diesel is here with Shawn, meaning Razor has to keep glancing down at him.

Ramon blocks an early hiptoss attempt and hits a hard chokeslam (Razor was one of the first to really use that around here and it’s never remembered). Shawn comes right back with a running neckbreaker and starts hammering away as the cameraman has to avoid a referee. A charging Razor is sent outside where Diesel gets in a clothesline, which earns him an ejection. The camera stays on Diesel all the way to the entrance and we come back to Shawn getting flipped upside down in the corner.

A hard clothesline puts Shawn on the floor and it’s time to pull back the ring mats. That takes too long though and Shawn is back in with some stomping. Razor isn’t having that and punches him in the face, but the Razor’s Edge over the top is countered with a backdrop to the floor onto the exposed concrete. With Ramon down holding his arm, Shawn goes to get the first ladder, which is baseball slidden into Razor’s ribs.

Back in and Shawn drives the ladder into the ribs and then slams it onto Ramon’s back to keep him in trouble. Shawn makes the first climb so razor pulls his tights down on the way up for the save. Since that’s a bit embarrassing, Shawn kicks him down and drops the elbow to put Ramon back down. Shawn goes up the ladder and dives off with a splash for one of the most famous shots in company history.

Another climb is broken up as Razor goes simple by shoving it over. Back up and they collide for a double knockdown and a much needed breather (at least for Shawn, as Razor has mainly just been getting beaten up). Razor is fine enough to throw Shawn into the ladder in the corner for a crash to the floor, but instead of climbing, Razor drives the ladder into Shawn into the post. It works so well that he does it again and then catapults Shawn into the ladder, sending it crashing back down onto Michaels for a good looking bump.

Back in and Razor BLASTS HIM in the face with the ladder, knocking Michaels outside again. Shawn breaks that up as well but this time the ladder falls down onto him, which is quite the punishment. They both go up so Razor backdrops him over the top, only to fall as well, with the ladder bending underneath him. Shawn dropkicks the ladder to make another save and then gets smart by shoving the ladder onto Razor.

Back up again and Shawn hits a superkick, setting up another hard piledriver. Shawn heads to the top and rides the ladder down onto Razor’s in another famous shot before setting the ladder up again. That takes too long though and Razor shoves it over, with Shawn’s leg getting tied in the ropes. That’s enough for Razor to go up and pull down the titles for the win at 18:51.

Rating: A+. I could go with “it’s the ladder match” as the explanation here and it would be completely covered, but this is again almost all about Shawn, as it should be. When you look back at the whole thing, there are only a few big Razor bumps or spots at all. The rest is Shawn doing things to Razor, who is mainly laying there. Razor got the title, but Shawn got the glory and fame here, which is how it should be. This is the match that really put Shawn on the map and my goodness it is easy to see why, as he was a human pinball who made this look flawless. I would tell you it’s great, but again, it’s the ladder match.

IRS, the Headshrinkers, Rick Martel and Adam Bomb argue about who the captain is going to be in their ten man tag. Somehow, this results in the match being postponed to Raw in a few weeks.

Ted DiBiase meets the Clinton impersonator but Clinton doesn’t want to talk politics.

Wrestlemania IX was outside and Yokozuna cheated to win the WWF Title. And nothing else happened after that.

Video on Bret Hart, set to Making Some Noise by Tom Petty.

Video on Yokozuna.

It’s time for the main event so Jenny Garth is timekeeper and a seemingly hammered Burt Reynolds is guest ring announcer.

WWF Title: Bret Hart vs. Yokozuna

Yokozuna, again with Jim Cornette and Mr. Fuji, is defending and the guest referee this time is….Roddy Piper. Bret even sells the leg from earlier in the night on his way to the ring, with Yokozuna jumping him on the way in. The slow beating is on, with Yokozuna hammering him down and then standing around for a bit. Yokozuna cuts off the comeback attempt and chokes in the ropes, earning a tongue lashing from Piper.

Bret fights back again with a headbutt, which actually puts Yokozuna down, albeit after some staggering. Cornette pulls Piper out at two so Piper drops him with as much effort as you would expect. The delay lets Yokozuna knock Bret over again and the legdrop lands right on his face. Back up and Yokozuna very, very slowly hammers on Bret in the corner, only to miss the big charge.

Bret slugs away and drops the middle rope elbow, setting up the running clothesline for two. A middle rope….something is pulled out of the air to set up the belly to belly and it’s time for the Banzai Drop. That takes a good while to set up though and Yokozuna loses his balance, falling backwards in a big crash. Bret covers and Piper counts rather quickly (so quickly that he doesn’t see Yokozuna’s shoulder being off the mat) for the pin and the title at 10:33.

Rating: C-. It was better than the Luger match because it didn’t go as long, but this was another match where Yokozuna looked like he was gassed after every move. That is the reason you get the title off of him because there isn’t much that can be done with e champion who is virtually immobile after two minutes. Bret didn’t so much win the title as much as he escaped with it, but sometimes that’s all you need to do.

Post match Yokozuna goes after Piper so here is Lex Luger to shake Bret’s hands. Piper comes back as well and here is the locker room, plus the celebrities, to join them. Even Vince and Gorilla Monsoon get in there. Bret is carried on their shoulders….and here is Owen to come out and look at him, with a shake of the head to end the show. That’s great storytelling and something so simple because so many people can relate to it, plus it isn’t some long ago call back that requires some big explanation. Nice job.

Overall Rating: B. This show is kind of fascinating really. the show is beloved and considered a classic, but outside of the opener and the ladder match, the wrestling is ok at best and terrible at worst. It’s a two match show and those two matches are both all timers, but the rest of the show is around a D+. There are some long stretches without anything good going on and that makes this a bit of a chore at times.

Then there is the other part of the show that makes it so well regarded: the show felt important. This felt like a celebration of the history of the biggest WWF show and that was something worth bragging about. At the same time, look at how they celebrated it: a quick look at each of the previous editions and Vince hyping up how important the show is. That’s it. No stadium, no LOOK AT US LOOK AT US LOOK AT US and no ridiculous scripted speeches from commentary with words no one would use. It felt natural but still big, which is something that has been completely lost on WWE over the years.

Overall, this is a special show and something that every fan needs to see at least once, just for the two major matches. Both of them are Wrestlemania moments, but they are about all that is worth watching on the show. I don’t know why Lelani Kai and Earthquake are on a major show in 1994, but that isn’t what people remember. Either way, check this one out if you have the chance, because it still feels special.

Ratings Comparison

Owen Hart vs. Bret Hart

Original: A+
2013 Redo: A+
2015 Redo: A+
2022 Redo: A

Bam Bam Bigelow/Luna Vachon vs. Doink the Clown/Dink

Original: F
2013 Redo: D
2015 Redo: D-
2022 Redo: D+

Randy Savage vs. Crush

Original: C+
2013 Redo: C
2015 Redo: C+
2022 Redo: C

Alundra Blayze vs. Lelani Kai

Original: D-
2013 Redo: D
2015 Redo: D-
2022 Redo: C-

Men on a Mission vs. Quebecers

Original: F
2013 Redo: F+
2015 Redo: D
2022 Redo: C

Yokozuna vs. Lex Luger

Original: F
2013 Redo: D+
2015 Redo: F
2022 Redo: D-

Earthquake vs. Adam Bomb

Original: N/A
2013 Redo: N/A
2015 Redo: N/A
2022 Redo: N/A

Razor Ramon vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: A+
2013 Redo: A+
2015 Redo: A+
2022 Redo: A+

Bret Hart vs. Yokozuna

Original: C+
2013 Redo: B-
2015 Redo: D+
2022 Redo: C-

Overall Rating

Original: A
2013 Redo: A-
2015 Redo: B+
2022 Redo: B

This one has actually gone down a bit over the years as the nostalgia might be wearing off a bit.

 

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Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania X (2015 Redo): The Anniversary Special

IMG Credit: WWE

Wrestlemania X
Date: March 20, 1994
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 18,065
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler

We open with a package on the first Wrestlemania as this is going to be a show heavy on celebrating history.

Vince introduces Little Richard and a choir to sing America the Beautiful. Richard sings a very nice solo version to start but the choir joins him for an encore and it picks up even more.

Owen Hart vs. Bret Hart

A monkey flip sends Owen into the ropes and a clothesline puts him on the floor. This has been back and forth so far but Bret is clearly a step ahead. Back in and Bret returns the slap before going back to the arm. Owen fights up and hits a spinwheel kick as Lawler rants about how the Hart parents lied about Bret protecting Owen when they were kids. A backbreaker sets up a camel clutch on Bret, followed by a belly to belly for two. Vince: “YES! NO!”

With nothing else working, Owen kicks him low and puts on the Sharpshooter as Lawler is ecstatic. Bret kicks him over and tries his own Sharpshooter but Owen is right in front of the ropes. Back up and Bret raises a boot in the corner to set up a victory roll but Owen drops forward into a rollup for the completely clean pin at 20:21.

Wrestlemania II was innovative (not really) and had a battle royal.

Bam Bam Bigelow/Luna Vachon vs. Doink the Clown/Dink the Clown

Randy Savage vs. Crush

The brawl is on in the aisle and Crush drops him throat first across the barricade (a move which helped start the feud) for a quick pin. Savage is back inside though (despite Mr. Fuji hitting him in the back with the Japanese flag) and the sixty second clock is already proving to be a bad idea. Crush ties him in the Tree of Woe for some shots to the ribs but stops to get some salt, only to have Savage knock it into his face. An ax handle and the elbow have Crush in trouble but Savage is smart enough to take him to the floor for the pin.

Video on Fan Fest, a precursor to Axxess.

Savage celebrates with some fans and we see his title win at Wrestlemania IV.

Rhonda Shear, the definition of a ditzy blonde, is in the back getting his picture taken with Shawn Michaels when a pretty drunk looking Burt Reynolds comes in to steal her.

Tag Team Titles: Quebecers vs. Men on a Mission

The champs hurt their backs as they try a double suplex but actually make the second attempt work. The Cannonball (assisted swanton bomb) gets two and Mabel does the power kickout. Back up and Mabel spinwheel kicks Pierre down to set up their assisted splash (Mo gets on the middle rope and drives Mabel down). Jacques fails at a save attempt but Mabel splashes Pierre on the floor for a countout at 7:43.

Rhonda Shear is guest timekeeper and Donnie Walhberg of the New Kids on the Block is guest ring announcer.

WWF World Title: Lex Luger vs. Yokozuna

Earthquake vs. Adam Bomb

A powerslam sets up the Earth Splash for the pin on Bomb at 35 seconds. Well that was pointless.

Intercontinental Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Razor Ramon

Shawn dropkicks Ramon off the ladder and wisely shoves the ladder onto Razor. For some reason Ramon is right back up, only to eat a superkick. We get one of the most famous spots of the match as Shawn rides the ladder off the top and down onto Razor for a big crash. Shawn goes up again but Razor shoulders the ladder down, sending Shawn into the ropes, tying his foot up in the process. Razor climbs up and pulls down the belts for the win and the undisputed title at 18:49.

Ted DiBiase tries to bribe Clinton.

Ring announcer Burt Reynolds introduces actress Jennie Garth as guest timekeeper. The special guest referee here: Roddy Piper, who may or may not want revenge on Bret for Wrestlemania VIII.

WWF World Title: Bret Hart vs. Yokozuna

A bunch of people including Savage, Ramon, Monsoon, Vince himself and the celebrities come out to celebrate with Bret but Owen shows up at the entrance to shake his head at Bret. He asks what about him and stares his still limping brother down to end the show.

Ratings Comparison

Owen Hart vs. Bret Hart

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A+

2015 Redo: A+

Bam Bam Bigelow/Luna Vachon vs. Doink the Clown/Dink

Original: F

2013 Redo: D

2015 Redo: D-

Randy Savage vs. Crush

Original: C+

2013 Redo: C

2015 Redo: C+

Alundra Blayze vs. Lelani Kai

Original: D-

2013 Redo: D

2015 Redo: D-

Men on a Mission vs. Quebecers

Original: F

2013 Redo: F+

2015 Redo: D

Yokozuna vs. Lex Luger

Original: F

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo: F

Earthquake vs. Adam Bomb

Original: N/A

2013 Redo: N/A

2015 Redo: N/A

Razor Ramon vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A+

2015 Redo: A+

Bret Hart vs. Yokozuna

Original: C+

2013 Redo: B-

2015 Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: A

2013 Redo: A-

2015 Redo: B+

It’s Wrestlemania X. This is classic viewing whether you’re a huge wrestling fan or some loser on a night shift.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/17/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-10-maybe-the-best-mania-ever/

And the 2013 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/03/19/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-x-how-can-you-not-love-this-show/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania X (2013 Redo): Sorry Bret

Wrestlemania X
Date: March 20, 1994
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 18,065
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler

We open with a clip from the first Wrestlemania. That still holds up to this day.

Little Richard and a choir sing America the Beautiful. The first version is just Richard but the choir kicks in on the second one, making for an awesome performance.

We recap Bret vs. Owen. Expect to hear the words “we recap” a lot tonight, because there is A LOT of backstory to this show. Back in mid to late 1993, Owen was getting annoyed at Bret getting all of the spotlight, but he went along with Bret and two more brothers on a Survivor Series team against Shawn Michaels and the Knights. The Knights were easily dispatched, but late in the match Owen was knocked into Bret, sending the elder brother (Bret) into the barricade. As his family went to check on him, Owen was rolled up and pinned, making him the only Hart to be eliminated.

Owen Hart vs. Bret Hart

We look at the Wrestlemania II battle royal.

Bam Bam Bigelow/Luna Vachon vs. Doink the Clown/Dink

Vachon goes up but misses a BIG splash, allowing the big boys to come back in. Doink pounds away but is clotheslined to the floor with one shot. Dink annoys both heels but Doink comes back in, only to be sat on in a sunset flip attempt. A charges misses the big clown though and a jumping DDT puts Bigelow down. The Whoopee Cushion (top rope seated senton) completely misses and Dink is knocked to the floor. Doink tries a suplex but Bigelow falls on him for two. The top rope headbutt is enough to finish off the clowns.

Bigelow tries to crush Dink but Doink makes the save.

A Bill Clinton impersonator is here. Somehow I.R.S. gets a spot in the presidential box.

Wrestlemania III was awesome!

Randy Savage vs. Crush

Rating: C. Keeping in mind that this was 1994, this was pretty good. Sixty seconds was too long of an interval as it was too long before the guy was in danger. If they cut it doewn to about thirty, this would have been much better. Either way, not bad here and more proof that Savage was still a very valuable asset to Vince, but for whatever reason (not Stephanie), he was let go.

We see videos from Fan Fest, which was the forerunner to Axxess.

Savage celebrates with the fans. He also won a tournament for the world title at Wrestlemania IV.

Kai was at the first Wrestlemania if that tells you anything. Blayze is the new champion after the belt was resurrected for no apparent reason. Kai, a Hawaiian/something else hybrid, runs Blayze over but gets caught in a sunset flip a few seconds later for two. Lelani comes back with a chokebomb for no cover but a bad splash gets two.

The champ comes back with a hurricanrana before there was a name for such a thing in America. Either way it gets two and we head to the floor. That goes nowhere so Kai hits a butterfly suplex for two. Blayze comes back with some basic strikes and some hair drags for two each. Alundra hits her bridging German suplex to retain a few seconds later.

Roddy Piper sprayed a non-celebrity with a fire extinguisher at Mania V.

Tag Titles: Men on a Mission vs. Quebecers

Wrestlemania VI had the Ultimate Challenge.

WWF World Title: Lex Luger vs. Yokozuna

Luger and Perfect yell at each in the back.

At Wrestlemania VII, Savage and Liz reunited. The moment given here is the Blindfold match but screw that.

Adam Bomb vs. Earthquake

Cornette goes on a rant against Lex Luger and cats while also calling Todd Pettingill “Petting Zoo” before yelling about Bret Hart. Then he talks about fish and Bret starting a feeding frenzy of sharks. I could listen to Cornette ramble while still staying on point for HOURS.

Intercontinental Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Razor Ramon

Ted DiBiase tries to bribe Mr. President.

Videos on Bret and Yoko set up the main event.

Burt Reynolds is guest ring announcer and my goodness he makes Scott Hall look like a poster boy for AA. Oh and Jennie Garth from Beverly Hills 90210 is timekeeper. The guest referee: Roddy Piper (pause for the huge ovation) who may or may not hate Bret because of what happened at Mania 8. Nice touch.

WWF World Title: Bret Hart vs. Yokozuna

The locker room empties out to celebrate with Bret but Owen stands in the aisle and stares down his brother to end the show.

Ratings Comparison

Owen Hart vs. Bret Hart

Original: A+

Redo: A+

Bam Bam Bigelow/Luna Vachon vs. Doink the Clown/Dink

Original: F

Redo: D

Randy Savage vs. Crush

Original: C+

Redo: C

Alundra Blayze vs. Lelani Kai

Original: D-

Redo: D

Men on a Mission vs. Quebecers

Original: F

Redo: F+

Yokozuna vs. Lex Luger

Original: F

Redo: D+

Earthquake vs. Adam Bomb

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Razor Ramon vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: A+

Redo: A+

Bret Hart vs. Yokozuna

Original: C+

Redo: B-

Overall Rating

Original: A

Redo: A-

I was a bit too nice to the middle part of the show last time.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/17/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-10-maybe-the-best-mania-ever/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania X (Original): The Feel Good One

Wrestlemania 10
Date: March 20, 1994
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 18,065
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler
America the Beautiful: Little Richard and the Harlem Boys Choir

This show is ALL backstory so get used to that word. Yokozuna had won the title back from Hogan at the first King of the Ring PPV after a Japanese photographer’s camera blew up in Hogan’s face. Hogan left the WWF and wasn’t seen there again for almost 9 years.

On the 4th of July in the previous year, Yokozuna held a huge thing on a US ship, challenging anyone to bodyslam him. There were a ton of people showing up to do it but no one could. Finally a helicopter landed on the ship and out walks the former heel Lex Luger.

He nails Yoko with the forearm and kind of slammed him, although you could argue it was a hiptoss. This launched Luger into one of the biggest face pushes of all time, resulting in his title shot at Summerslam. Luger knocked Yoko unconscious but he knocked him out of the ring as well.

Luger wanted another title shot but was told he would have to win the Rumble to get it. Bret Hart also wanted his rematch at Mania but was told HE had to win the Rumble. Low and behold they’re the final two. They go out at the same time, and we have a tie. The WWF President Jack Tunney decrees that there will be a coin toss deciding who gets the match first.

The loser will have to have a match before getting their title shot and no matter what, whoever comes out of the first match with the title would have to face the loser of the title match. If Bret lost the toss he would have to face Owen and if Lex lost he would have to face Crush. Lex wins the toss so Bret would be the one to close out Mania. I hope that made sense.

This Mania was a new beginning for the company as there was no more Hulk Hogan to carry the load. With him gone, it was time for the young guns to step up and take over. Following last year’s awful Mania, something big had to happen here and it went about as well as it could have given the ridiculous story that I just listed off to you.

There was also a thing called a ladder match that I’m sure will bomb completely. Anyway, after Little Richard rocks the house, it’s time for what is still likely the best opening contest of all time. Also our own NSL was in attendance.

We open with a highlight reel of the first Mania which really is a cool thing. The first one was absolutely amazing from a mainstream perspective.

We recap Bret vs. Owen. Bret had been feuding with HBK all of the previous year which resulted in a Survivor Series match between Shawn’s team and Bret’s team of him and his three brothers. Owen was accidentally knocked off the apron and into the railing leading to his elimination.

Later Bret attempted to help his brother get his first title by teaming with him to go for the tag titles. Bret was injured during the match and it wound up costing them the match. After the match, Owen kicked Bret’s leg out from under him, fully turning heel. This was the showdown that had been building for awhile.

Bret Hart vs. Owen Hart

Ok so this is considered the best opener ever, so let’s see if it’s still that good. Remember Bret has to be in the main event later tonight against the winner of Lex vs. Yoko for the title. There’s the bell and it’s game on. It’s MSG so the entrance is behind the ring rather than off to either side. Owen keeps celebrating every tiny victory which is funny stuff.

Naturally it’s a technical style to start which is exactly what you would expect it to be. A little leverage sends Owen to the floor so Owen slaps him in the face. Almost all Bret to start as Owen can’t get much going but it’s being destroyed at all. Rollup gets two for Bret and it’s to the mat with Owen. Bret speeds it up again and sends Owen to the floor where he’s very frustrated.

Now it’s Bret with a slap and a rollup for two again. Crucifix gets two and to my shock and awe, Lawler says Bret is the better wrestler. You’ll likely never hear that again. There’s that spinwheel kick and Owen takes over for real for the first time in the match. Bret’s back meets post on the floor and Owen SCREAMS at him. Camel clutch goes on and Owen yells some more as you have to wonder how legit that is.

Belly to belly puts Bret down for two. Of course it’s only two. It’s not like Owen could ever beat him or something. Give me a break. Owen tries to suplex Bret back in but Bret reverses but Owen reverses that into a BIG German for a long two. Bret grabs a small package for two as Owen continues his dominance. Owen gets a Tombstone out of nowhere and Bret is in trouble.

No cover though as Owen goes up for a splash which hits. Too bad it hit the canvas and not Bret, but it did indeed hit something. Russian Leg Sweep gets two for Bret. The middle rope elbow gets the same. Owen gets an enziguri “out of nowhere” and goes for the Sharpshooter. Bret reverses into an attempt of his own but can’t get that either.

Bret with a Pescado but hurts his knee and amazingly enough isn’t goldbricking. Owen goes after it and Vince is surprised for some reason. That reason would be that Vince from this era is a very stupid man. The leg goes around the post and Bret is in trouble. Owen’s mocking of Bret is great as for him it’s personal. Well granted it has to be personal as it’s between two people but you get the idea.

The blonde Hart gets a leg lock which gets two as Bret’s shoulders are down. Lawler points out that it would be smart for Bret to give up so he has a better chance in the title match later. That’s actually very true. Figure Four by Owen and WOO Bret is in trouble. Bret rolls out but Owen grabs a rope as we keep going. Bret comes back with an enziguri as for once Vince’s WHAT A MATCHUP isn’t overkill.

Owen’s selling is awesome as every time he gets hit he stays in one place like he’s been shot. Bret gets a Piledriver to probably tick off Jerry a bit. A superplex gets two as Bret can’t finish him. A sleeper from Bret is countered by a low blow as Owen takes over again. Owen gets the Sharpshooter as Bret is in trouble again after the back and knee work from earlier. Ladies and gentlemen, PSYCHOLOGY! Oh how I love it.

Bret counters into his own but Owen is right in front of the ropes so it’s not like it means anything. Bret finally starts throwing punches but they’re to the ribs which Vince makes sure to point out. Owen reverses a whip-in but Bret gets his feet up. Bret goes for a Victory Roll but Owen rolls into it and gets a rollup for the pin to silence the entire arena. Awesome finish to an awesome match.

Rating: A+. This match had been viewed as one of the best matches of all time and it holds up today. The psychology here is off the charts here as both wanted the submission but Owen goes for the pinfall and uses Bret’s own wrestling technique against him.

The best thing about this match is simple though: Owen pinned him perfectly clean. The better man won and that’s what makes the match so much better and one of the best ever. This was proof that a match could work on basic wrestling and the buildup for it. Classic all the way.

We get a post match promo in the back from Owen talking about how great his victory was and everything he says is absolutely right. He even gives credit to Bret for putting on such a great match. Love this promo. Excellent start to the show so far.

WM Moment: WM 2 Battle Royal.

The president of the hair club for men has a toupee for the Fink. Humorous if nothing else. Is there any reason why some dude named Bill Dunn is doing the announcing here and not the Fink?

Bam Bam Bigelow/Luna Vachon vs. Doink/Dink

This is what gets to follow that opener. These guys feuded forever for no apparent reason and no one cared. This has the distinct look of a comedy match here and I don’t it’s going to end well. Thankfully Howard does the announcing here. Doink is played by some dude from Puerto Rico here I believe.

Bigelow jumps the big clown and we’re off. A dropkick puts him down and hopefully this is dominance. Vince’s overall conclusion about Lawler: he’s not a nice person. Off to Dink and Luna as I search for a reason to have this at Wrestlemania. Get on with this already.

Luna misses a top rope splash and it’s back off to the big guys. You know, the future pyromaniac and the full grown wrestling clown. This is after a classic match and before one of the best gimmick matches of all time. And we get to the “comedy”, and I use that term loosely, of the match. Bigelow sits on a sunset flip attempt and the beating is on. After some time is wasted, a top rope headbutt ends Doink finally.

Rating: F. This was a complete waste of time. Thankfully this is the end of the feud and it was never mentioned again. Bigelow went from potential IC Champion to this in six years. There’s your explanation as to what a knee injury can do for you. Get on to something else.

Post match Luna and Dink do a stupid segment that just extends this longer with nothing coming from it.

There’s a Bill Clinton impersonator here for some reason.

WM Moment: Attendance record at WM 3.

Randy Savage vs. Crush

No backstory here but that’s what I’m here for. Crush had challenged Yokozuna for the WWF title and got beaten pretty badly. Yoko hit some banzai drops on him and put him out of action. Savage came in at the very end to help Crush, after he got hurt. Savage was about to be reinstated as a wrestler when he and Crush got into a fight at ringside. Savage was suspended from commentating but came out of retirement to wrestle. They had been feuding since November but this was their big match.

Savage is a full blown legend at this point, along the lines of what HBK is at this point. Needless to say, he was mad over in this match. The rules here are you get a pinfall but then the person has sixty seconds to get back into the ring. Therefore you could get a ton of pinfalls in this. Savage charges at him in the aisle and the fight is on.

Crush gets Snake Eyes on the railing and the first pin is in less than a minute. Fuji blasts him with the flag and Savage makes it back in with seconds to spare. Crush is dominating and gets him in the Tree of Woe. Fuji hands him some salt but Savage is like boy I wrestled in Memphis and throws it back in Crush’s face. That and a slam sets up the elbow but no cover. Oh ok he throws him to the floor and THEN gets the pin. That was smart.

Fuji has to grab some water to throw on Crush to kep the match going which is kind of funny. They hit the floor for awhile and it’s all Savage for the most part here. Savage reverses a backdrop in the aisle and we head to the back. Savage slams him on the concrete and then in an incredibly creative finish, Savage uses a rope and ties Crush upside down from a scaffold to get the guaranteed win. Awesome ending to a fun match and also the extent of Savage meaning anything as a WWF wrestler.

Rating: C+. This match was a real grudge match and you could see the emotions coming out. This was the precursor to what would become hardcore and the last man standing match. The falls having to be outside of the ring was just a bad idea though and holds it back. Savage as the legend is something that really works well for him. I’ve always liked this match for some reason, partially because Savage was still awesome at this point and was clearly having fun out there.

Todd talks to the fake Clinton again. It’s pointless. To be fair though, he’s a pro imitator and it’s made to look legit so this is a huge improvement over what we usually get. IRS is there with him and congratulates him for raising the taxes. I’ll spare you a long rant on that one.

We recap fan fest which is the precursor to Axxess.

Savage goes into the crowd to celebrate as we see another WM moment with Savage winning the belt.

Women’s Title: Alundra Blayze vs. Lelani Kai

For some reason, Kai’s music here is the same that Harley Race came to the ring to during Flair’s retirement ceremony last year. Very odd indeed as there’s absolutely no connection between the two that I know of. Kai was the Women’s Champion going into the first Mania, 9 years before this. She was the best option they had? Seriously?

Blayze is more common known as Madusa in WCW. Sunset flip out of the corner gets two for the champion. This isn’t going to be anything special at all is it? Another sunset flip is the high point of it so far. The crowd is DEAD. A slam gets two as I think you can get what’s going on here. All Blayze does is leverage stuff although I’d bet a lot of this ending with a German suplex. This needs to end badly and the German finally does it. Moolah, Mae and Nikolai Volkoff are sitting together for some reason.

Rating: D-. The match itself isn’t bad, but this is at Wrestlemania and it’s clear that this match was thrown onto the card. There’s no story, no build, no time given to it, and no one cares. Blazye was solid, and in case you can’t place here she’s far more famous as Madusa in WCW. The problem she had though was there was no competition for her anywhere at all. She was the woman that dropped the Women’s Title in the trash on Nitro which allegedly triggered Montreal.

WM moment: Roddy sprays Morton Downey Jr. at WM 5. Funny actually.

Tag Titles: Men on a Mission vs. The Quebecers

Zero transition between the previous moment and this. Oh my I had forgotten about M.O.M. This very well may be the worst gimmick of all time. The idea behind the team was that they would help young kids improve their lives in the inner cities by preaching positive values to them.

Of course there’s one thing they need to get over. What’s the one thing that every young kid is into? What does everybody love? No not head you sick freaks. Get your minds out of the gutters. They love RAP of course. Therefore, the team had a rapping manager named Oscar.

The team was therefore Mabel (more commonly known as Viscera or Big Daddy V), Oscar, (more commonly known as annoying) and Mo (more commonly known as Felix, the bum that washes your windows in exchange for a non-urine soaked blanket and a bag of Funions). Mabel, Oscar, Mo. M.O.M.

Now after that description, what’s coming next is absolute proof that Satan himself is a wrestling fan: THEY GOT OVER. Yes, somehow this team was wildly popular to the point that they were regular tag title contenders, even winning the belts at a house show literally by mistake. Mabel fell on one of the Quebecers and he couldn’t kick out in time because of the weight.

Anyway, this is for the tag titles so let’s get it over with. It’s a basic formula for MOM: Mo does all the work until Mabel comes in to clean house. For some reason that no one knows, we cut to the back for an interview with some annoying blonde tv show host? Before she can talk though, HBK interrupts for some reason but the girl doesn’t mind.

They pose for a picture until Burt Reynolds interrupts. He says Shawn should shave his chest before Shawn leaves. Can someone pick Bex up off the floor? Apparently the girl’s show is called Up All Night and Burt makes a joke saying she keeps him up all night and they both wish there was something they could do about that as the dirty jokes of Mania continue their hallowed tradition.

We go back to the arena after that totally random moment for the Quebecers entrance. They’re accompanied by Johnny Polo, a.k.a. Raven in a gimmick that astounds me to this day. Considering what he would become in less than two years, to be Polo here is amazing.

Oh I forgot to mention: MOM’s outfits are shiny purple and gold with the writing on Mabel’s chest saying whomp there it is. Let’s get this over with. The champions jump the apparent Laker fans and double team Mabel. Mo gets a cross body on Pierre and a big old legdrop from Mabel to the back of Pierre’s head nearly kills him.

The Quebecers do a sneaky switch and Mo, of course, is in trouble. Jacques backdrops Pierre onto Mo for two. I want this to end very soon. Mo hits the ropes and kind of rolls forward to take down Pierre. False tag to Mabel sets up a missed guillotine legdrop and the tag to Mabel to ZERO reaction.

Mabel misses a charge into what must be a hard buckle as it somehow gets through the layer of flab known as Mabel’s gut. On their second attempt the Quebecers actually get a suplex on the fat one. A Cannonball gets two on Mabel as this is DRAGGING. Mabel hits his spin kick and the double splash from him and Mo for no count. After another double splash the champions take a walk for the countout. Well at least it’s over.

Rating: F. This was dull stuff and the ending was completely awful. Mabel was so fat that he fell on a Quebecer at a house show and it was enough to accidentally switch the titles. Mo was totally worthless to the point that Mabel was the better one. What does that tell you?

Another Mania moment is the Ultimate Challenge from Mania 6 which is awesome.

We bring in the celebrities which are a bit weak this year. Some chick from USA and some actor named Donny Wahlberg are here. OH! That isn’t a TV station they’re saying. It’s NKOTB: New Kids on the Block. WOW this is even worse than I thought it was.

WWF Title: Yokozuna vs. Lex Luger

Here we have the first of two WWF Title matches tonight. Due to Lex Luger winning the coin toss he gets the first crack here. The winner of this match faces Bret Hart in the main event, which is stupid as Bret already lost but that’s logic and therefore doesn’t belong in wrestling. This is a rematch from Summerslam and the theory is that Luger has Yoko’s number.

First though we have a guest referee: Mr. Perfect, who hadn’t been seen in forever. This Donny dude isn’t a bad announcer actually. The fans chant USA almost immediately. Perfect is in a referee shirt and matching pants, making it look like he’s in pajamas. Manly pajamas mind you but still pajamas. They stare it down in the middle and Luger hammers away.

Clothesline hits but Yoko doesn’t move. Yoko hits one of his own and Luger certainly does move. To the floor and Yoko eats steps so we go back into the ring. This isn’t looking good early on. Luger goes aerial and gets a cross body for two. Lex goes for a slam but can’t get the fatness up again so Yoko gets going again. Granted he didn’t get going in the first place but it sounds better that way I guess.

Yoko tries to get the buckle off a corner but Lex stops him with punches. We hit a nerve hold which is a nice way to say Yoko is tired and needs to lean on someone to rest for awhile. Two minutes have passed and nothing has changed. Literally, ALL nerve hold for that stretch. It’s broken up, Luger fights him off, gets knocked down again and we hit the nerve hold again. We’re seven minutes into this match and over half has been nerve holding.

Luger is sent to the floor and Fuji trips him which is somehow the most interesting thing we’ve had going on so far. Oh look: MORE NERVE HOLDING! I get that Yoko isn’t able to move that well and needs to conserve energy for later, but maybe, just maybe, THAT MEANS THIS WAS A BAD IDEA! Luger gets some clotheslines and slams Yoko before the forearm hits.

Cornette and Fuji are brought into the ring which gets them nowhere. Luger covers Yoko who is out cold but Perfect won’t count due to the loaded arm. It’s a heel move but it’s perfectly legal which is my favorite kind. Perfect won’t count, Luger isn’t happy because he thinks Perfect has better hair, Luger shoves him and it’s a DQ. At least it’s over.

Rating: F. Sweet merciful crap this was dull. Luger’s offense consisted of various clotheslines and punches. Aside from that there was probably 1/3 nerve hold. The fans have one of the loudest BULL chants I’ve ever heard. This was an awful match to put it mildly and the ending kills it even worse. Just awful all around.

While it’s a ridiculous finish, allegedly it was Lex’s own fault. There’s a fairly popular theory in wrestling that Luger was supposed to leave WM with the title but went out to a bar and got drunk before telling a bunch of the people that he was going to win it. WWF found out and changed the plans, leading to this finish. Whether that’s true or not, I wouldn’t be surprised. Luger’s push was monumental at this point and him getting the title would have made sense.

Luger screams at Perfect in the back over what happened.

WM moment: from WM 7, the awful blindfolded match. Even Vince says “yet another WM moment” as he’s getting sick of them too.

Harvey Whipleman and the Fink get into an argument. Adam Bomb runs out to protect Harvey from the horrible terror that is the Fink and his slaps of death. Earthquake runs out for this.

Earthquake vs. Adam Bomb

Seriously? Quake still had a job in 19 freaking 94??? This is literally three moves long. Belly to belly, powerslam, Earthquake, pinfall. What in the world was the point of this? No rating of course.
Jim Cornette cuts another of his great fast talking promos that so many people should study. Really, this guy is gold. You can just hear the passion flowing out of him whenever he speaks.

Another Mania Moment is Taker appearing at Mania 8. There was nothing to it and I have no clue why this was listed here.

Intercontinental Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Razor Ramon

No backstory again, so here I am to save the day! The idea here is Shawn was the IC Champion but was fired/released from the company for testing positive for steroids. He was the IC Champion at the time and was stripped for not defending it often enough. However he was rehired a few months later and still had the title belt. He said he was the real IC Champion, despite Razor Ramon having won it in his absence. The solution: this match. Put both belts above the ring and the first person to go get them wins both.

The announcer says there are no rules in this match, then lists off how you win. That sounds like a set of rules to me. Dang if you can’t trust wrestling what can you trust? I can’t really overstate the importance of this one enough as it made both guys’ careers and changed wrestling forever, as now instead of being about power and muscle guys, younger and more athletic guys were stealing the show with high flying and innovative stuff. Huge stuff to say the least.

Also for a bit of known trivia, Shawn vs. Bret was the first ladder match nearly two years before this. Razor stares at Diesel as we get going. Shawn tries to move around and use his speed so Razor grabs him by the throat and hits a chokeslam. The cameraman runs into the referee on the floor as it’s been far too long since I watched this match.

Diesel hits a clothesline to Razor on the floor and is thrown out almost immediately. NOW we get to the good stuff. Razor hits a HUGE clothesline to send Shawn to the floor as this is incredibly hard hitting already. Razor peels back some mats on the floor but the fight goes back to the ring. Shawn backdrops his way out of the Razor’s Edge and Razor crashes onto the concrete.

IT’S LADDER TIME as this is about to get awesome. Shawn gets the baseball slide into the ladder into Razor’s ribs and the Bad Guy is in trouble now. The ladder is fully in the ring now and Shawn begins his dominance. The ribs take a big old pounding now as Shawn literally drops the ladder on his back.

Shawn goes up but Razor grabs a foot. Oh great it’s Shawn’s back again. And do we really need to zoom in on it? We get the famous spot of the match as Shawn jumps off the ladder with a splash onto Razor which has aired in about 1000 highlight reels. Shawn goes up again but Razor shoves the ladder over, sending Shawn into the ropes to put both guys down.

We get the always cool Wile E. Coyote shot from above which is cool to see as Razor looks a bit dead. Shawn goes into the ladder in the corner and crashes to the floor. So far all of the big bumps involving the ladder have been done by Shawn as the biggest Razor has done was being thrown over the top before the ladder came into play.

Slingshot into the ladder and Shawn hangs on so it falls backwards and crushes him against the floor. Razor is alone in the ring now with the ladder and goes up but Shawn dives in off the top for the last second save. Both guys climb and the slug out is on. Razor slams him off the ladder and takes a rather slow fall down onto the ropes to the point where he doesn’t actually hit the ground.

Shawn dropkicks him off the ladder and Razor takes a decent enough bump this time. Razor is still down so Shawn just shoves the ladder on top of him. Why mess with the simple stuff? Big Piledriver to Razor has his down for a good while now. Shawn gets in another famous spot as he rides the ladder down onto Razor and both guys are in pain again.

And alas it has to end as Shawn puts the ladder over top of Razor which doesn’t really do much. Razor gets up, shoves the ladder and along with it Shawn over. His leg gets caught in the ropes and Razor climbs unhindered to the top to become the undisputed Intercontinental Champion. Shawn did the majority of the bumping here but the idea of Shawn doing everything in this is absurd.

Rating: A+. The best gimmick match of all time at that point by a long shot. This is one of the handful of WWF matches give five stars by Meltzer and for once I agree with him. These two beat the tar out of each other and it still more than holds up over fifteen years later. This is what made Shawn and Razor, which is rare to see for two guys.

There was a scheduled ten man tag scheduled that had to be cut for time reasons. It was held on Raw a few weeks later. Nothing special.

DiBiase tries to buy the President who brushes him off.

We get a pretty sweet video package on Bret, further cementing his title win tonight. A similar package airs on Yoko but it’s far worse, and it leads us to the main event.

WWF Title: Yokozuna vs. Bret Hart

This is the first time ever that we get a rematch in the main event of Mania. A bunch of mid 90s celebrities introduce themselves and maybe 10 people care. Seriously, this NEVER works as they’re outdated in two years 99% of the time. However, the guest referee is introduced: HOT ROD HIMSELF, Rowdy Roddy Piper! Holy goodness, this makes absolutely no sense but who cares??? Burt Reynolds is the drunk ring announcer for the evening.

Yoko is out first, as if Bret needed anymore guarantees that he’ll be winning here. This is a year after their first match and Bret has come a LONG way since then and here it actually seems that he’s got a chance to pull it off. If you watch WM 9’s main event and then this one back to back, you’ll see exactly what I’m talking about. A very subtle difference also is Bret’s music. Last year he was using the Hart Foundation’s old music, whereas this time it’s his own song.

This match also truly feels like a main event. You really get the feeling that this is truly it. The more I see the finish the more I like it. Oh yeah we have an actual match here.

Yokozuna jumps Bret to start as Bret’s knee is still messed up from earlier in the night which is the kind of continuity you rarely get anymore. Yoko misses what can only be described as a running Frog Splash and both guys are down. Piper counts a bit fast for my taste. Bret gets a headbutt and hurts himself.

Down goes Yoko off a solid shot as the crowd is clearly pretty tired. Bret knocks him back down with just strikes which isn’t considered a huge deal this year. Huge difference there which helps a lot. Piper drills Cornette for interfering. Legdrop hits Bret and he’s in big trouble. He fights back and gets a bulldog for a long two. You can’t blame Piper as he DOVE to get the hand down.

Bret gets up and limps ever so slightly. NICE. A clothesline puts Yoko down for two again. Bret comes off the middle rope and jumps into a belly to belly and the Canadian is in trouble. Yoko takes him to the corner to set up the Banzai Drop but he literally slips and falls off the ropes and Bret climbs on for the pin to get the title back. It sounds corny but this surprisingly worked.

Rating: C+. The main reason this match is miles ahead of last year’s is it gets a little more time. With Yoko you can’t go much longer than 15 minutes as he gets tired as well as he starts to run out of moves that he can use. This match clocks in at about 11 minutes, which doesn’t sound like much when compared to the nine and a half that it got the year before, but the time really does help.

There’s far less of the match dedicated to Bret trying to find a way around Yoko’s size and he just goes for it from bell to bell and it’s a huge improvement. He comes off as a challenger and not an underdog the entire time which helps it out a lot. Rather than having Bret doing whatever he can to survive, Bret looks like a guy looking for a way to win, which is a subtle but key difference. FAR better than last year.

Luger comes down to congratulate him as the locker room empties for the big celebration. Owen won’t get in there though and we have the feud for the rest of the year.

Overall Rating: A. You have a 9 match card with two all time classics and do I really need to go on? This show is all about that and the rest is just kind of there, but all the bad stuff is pretty short. When you have two A+ matches on one show, it’s kind of hard to say it’s anything but great. The one criticism I have: why wasn’t Luger vs. Bret the main event? Either way, this was a great show as it feels epic on all levels and it comes off that way too. Definitely worth seeing.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – September 12, 1994: They Don’t Get Irony Do They?

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: September 12, 1994
Location: Lowell Memorial Auditorium, Lowell, Massachusetts
Attendance: 2,300
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Randy Savage

It’s another month here and this time around we’re starting in the middle, as the US Open Tennis Tournament took away the first week of September. We’re a long way off from Survivor Series so we don’t have much to build towards at the moment, but that tends to be the case in 1994 anyway. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Undertaker vs. Kwang

This is Undertaker’s first match on Raw since January and Kwang is Savio Vega under a mask with Harvey Wippleman as a manager. They stare at each other a lot and Kwang makes the mistake of going after him, meaning the beating can start in a hurry. Kwang hits him in the back and gets stared down, followed by a slam for a bonus. The Stunner over the top sets up Old School back inside as we take a break.

Back with Kwang hammering away before Undertaker pretty easily wins a slugout. Kwang scores with a superkick and clothesline to the floor….but Undertaker lands on his feet because that’s what he does. Back in and Kwang spits mist at him, only to have Undertaker spit it right back at him. The chokeslam is good for the pin.

Rating: D+. This was your “welcome home” return match and that’s all well and good. Undertaker looked pretty dominant and that’s what they need from him after such a long absence. Kwang is fine for a midcard villain and I don’t think there is anyone who believed he was ever going to be anything more than that. 1994 wasn’t a great time for midcarders and that wasn’t going to get any better for a long time.

Highlights of Bret Hart vs. Owen Hart in a cage at Summerslam, plus the post match fracas.

Jim Neidhart vs. Tim McNeaney

Owen Hart is here with Jim. Neidhart throws him around with ease and then tosses him outside. A forearm to the chest brings McNeaney back in and Owen tells Neidhart to hurt him a little more. Another slam sets up the camel clutch to give Neidhart the easy win.

Rating: D. The whole Neidhart vs. Bret feud is a good example of how chemistry means so much. Neidhart is not all that interesting on his own but he has a history with Bret and that makes things all the better. It makes things that much better and saves us from boring squashes like this one.

Post match the hold goes on again and Owen puts some Bret glasses on McNeaney.

We look at Jerry Lawler popping Dink’s balloons. Doink looked furious and you never want a crowd swearing vengeance.

It’s time for the King’s Court. After Lawler insults some fans, he holds up a letter from Jack Tunney demanding that he apologize to Doink and Dink. Therefore, Lawler will be the bigger man than Dink, so the clowns can come out here. This includes Dink in a Burger King crown, which is not going to end well. Doink and Lawler make fun of each other’s clothes before Lawler gets in some more short jokes about Dink.

The clowns just want to make things right so they have a present for him. Vince thinks it’s a box of WWF Magazines with Doink and Dink on the cover, because that’s a heck of a gift. Lawler is scared of what’s in there so Doink opens it for him. It’s….a trashcan, because Lawler is facing Duke the Dumpster Droese next week. Lawler kicks the trashcan, which just happens to have metal weights inside. I hate that I laughed at that one.

Come to the Hart Attack Tour!

Diesel/Shawn Michaels vs. Tony Devito/Paul Van Dale

The fans chant for Diesel as Shawn slaps Devito in the face early on. A Diesel distraction lets Shawn knock him outside and it’s off to Diesel for a hard forearm to the face. It’s already back to Shawn for a chinlock but he lets it up in a hurry so Van Dam can come in. That’s fine with Diesel, who plants him with a big boot. The Jackknife sets up Shawn’s splash from on top of Diesel’s shoulder for the easy pin.

Rating: C. This was an entertaining little squash and that’s all it needed to be. Shawn and Diesel are cited as the best big man/little man combination for a reason: they’re really good at what they do and that’s what we saw here. Van Dale wasn’t much, but his daughter was a little more fabulous. You probably know her as Carmella.

We look at Ted DiBiase trying to buy Adam Bomb but Bomb got in a fight with Bam Bam Bigelow instead.

Adam Bomb vs. Dwayne Gill

Bomb is now in blue and yellow for a change of pace. Gill gets shoved down to start and then bounces off of Bomb’s shoulder. Some kicks out of the corner and something like a bulldog onto the top turnbuckle have Bomb in trouble for all of a second before he’s back with a dropkick. A side slam connects and Gill’s missed crossbody sends him outside. Back in and the slingshot clothesline into the pumphandle slam finishes Gill with ease.

Rating: D+. I’ve always had a soft spot for Bomb so this was a fun match. Bomb was someone with the size and athleticism to make it work but it’s not like he had that high of a ceiling. His southern hick voice didn’t help things but I thought he could have been fine as a midcard star and maybe even an Intercontinental Title challenger. Or maybe he could go nowhere while the WWF came up with one horrible idea after another.

A man goes to confession but his priest is watching wrestling. Dig the New Generation. Voiceover: “Put your faith in us.”

Bushwhackers vs. Barry Hardy/Burt Centino

Now you know as well as I do that the WWF doesn’t get the irony of going from a New Generation ad to THE BUSHWHACKERS in 1994. Butch and Hardy start things off and the latter is already in trouble. A bite of the trunks connects as Knuckleball Schwartz is on strike in the crowd. Centino and Luke come in with the latter hitting a clothesline for no count as Hardy comes in. Butch shoves Hardy onto Centino and counts two, which is too far for the referee. A chop staggers Centino and the Battering Ram is good for the pin.

Rating: D. The Bushwhackers in the last match on the show in 1994? For the life of me I don’t get why this took place but that’s what you get around this time. It wasn’t even a good squash as it was mainly comedy, but what else could be expected here? At least it was short, and that’s the signature line about any horrible match.

We end with a preview of next week’s show, with Duke Droese vs. Jerry Lawler listed twice for some reason.

Overall Rating: D. As usual, Shawn and Diesel were the highlights here and they weren’t exactly thrilling. This is a horrible time for the company and the New Generation still wasn’t taking off yet. They needed something to get them a breath of fresh air and that would wind up being Diesel. Based on the reaction he got here, you can’t blame them. You can blame them for the rest of the show though, which was pretty horrible.

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Wham Bam Bodyslam – Worst Tape Ever? It’s Close At Least

Wham Bam Bodyslam
Host: Ted DiBiase
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Stan Lane

Another Coliseum Video here that has no particular reason at all to be done here. Since it’s a pointless tape with nothing special that I recall about it at all, that means it’s time for a review! Let’s get to it.

Looks to be from 94-95. Ted promises us a special feature with Doink and Dink. What did I do to deserve this?

Tatanka vs. Lex Luger

Tatanka is part of the Million Dollar Team so this is after Summerslam 94. We’re in Albany it seems. The racial stereotype tries to talk but gets cut off by the music of the Renegade Lex Luger. Luger goes right after Tatanka and we’re on in a hurry. The Indian hides on the floor as we stall a lot. Luger wants to kill him it seems. Literally all we have here is Luger chasing Tatanka and Tatanka running away.

FINALLY the referee gets in Luger’s way and we get going. Luger hammers away and after about a minute I have a bad feeling about this tape. Out to the floor and it’s Tatanka in control. We’re maybe four minutes into this and I want to go watch some Sandman vs. Sabu. Three elbows get two for Tatanka.

Ah there’s a chinlock. Wow this is riveting. Luger’s face is pathetic here as he might as well be ordering dinner. He fights up and Tatanka gets a knee to put him back down. Back to the chinlock again. To tell you how pathetic the Million Dollar Team was, King Kong Bundy was considered their best chance at getting a title. Lex fights up again and AGAIN it’s the chinlock. This is one of the most boring matches I’ve ever seen, which is covering a lot of ground.

Luger knocks Tatanka to the floor which seems to be a common theme tonight. Lex goes out after him and the beating continues. At least this is finally picking up a bit. It’s about time after that big long boring match. And there’s a double countout to end this. Oh no. Oh no they didn’t just give us THAT finish after watching these two for almost fifteen minutes. Dang it yes they did.

Rating: F. This was AWFUL. Nothing happened in this and it was the epitome of filling in time without having to do a thing. This was a feud I always liked and then we get this nonsense. Totally boring match that is mostly chinlock and running. I know this era was bad but this isn’t making me feel any better about this tape.

Post match we get a tease of more fighting and Luger gives Tatanka the Rack. Oh I’m sorry: the REBEL Rack.

Bret Hart/British Bulldog vs. Owen Hart/Jim Neidhart

Ok, this HAS to be good right? Bret is world champion here so this is probably around August of 94 as that was the top feud around that time. Still in Albany and likely at the same show. Apparently this was October 19, 1994. I’ve always wondered which shows they picked to film and how they were chosen. Bret and Owen start so we’re guaranteed a good start at least. Granted after that last match anything sounds great.

I love Owen celebrating while doing absolutely nothing. Lots of chain wrestling to start as you would expect. Bret works on the arm and gets a crucifix for two. They speed it up a bit and Bret gets a clothesline to put Owen on the floor. Back in and Bret taunts Neidhart, saying he wants the Anvil.

Now here’s a match I don’t think I’ve ever seen. Bret tries his usual stuff but Anvil catches him in a bear hug. Hart bites Anvil’s head to escape and it’s time for power vs. power. Ok never mind as it’s time for Owen vs. Bulldog. They’re getting in and out of there rather fast. Stan Lane continues to be underrated at the announce table. Owen gets caught in the semi-delayed vertical for two.

We hit the chinlock again even though I thought we had hit the quota of chinlocks in the first match. Spinwheel kick puts Bulldog down for two and it’s back to Anvil who puts on a chinlock of his own. The fans are chanting for Owen actually. Owen comes in again and drills Bulldog with some European uppercuts in a nice bit of irony. Shawn Killer Kick makes Smith flip forward and the double teaming commences.

Neidhart back in there now as the heels are working well together here. Bret chases Owen but the referee stops him. This stopping though allows the New Foundation (Owen and Neidhart of course) to hit a Hart Attack on Bulldog for two. Neckbreaker by Owen gets two and we hit the chinlock one more time. This is very much a stop and go kind of match as they’ll get going and then stop for a chinlock etc.

Bulldog fights up and they hit head to head. There’s a tag to Hart but Neidhart had the referee distracted. Heel miscommunication puts Anvil down and there’s the tag to the champion. He beats up both guys while Bulldog just watches on. What a nice partner he is. Russian Leg Sweep gets two on Owen and it’s Five Moves of Doom time. He actually gets the Sharpshooter but Neidhart makes the save. Off to the Bulldog again and everything breaks down. Bulldog gets a small package, Neidhart turns it over, Bret turns it over again and Bulldog pins Owen to end it.

Rating: B-. If you cut out a lot of the rest holds and give it a bit better ending then this would be a much better match. Still though not a bad match at all and I thought it was pretty good. With these four it’s hard not to have a good match. Neidhart was the worst of these four but he’s certainly watchable in the ring. Decent match but could have been much better.

And now, it’s time for Doink and Dink. This isn’t looking like a great tape so far. They run around the WWF Studios playing pranks on people. I hate my life. Oh sweet goodness they’re going to do more of this later.

Intercontinental Title: Jeff Jarrett vs. Razor Ramon

Same show again and Razor is champion. Razor has some fat guy with him that I don’t recognize. Ah apparently that’s his guest manager for this match. Shouldn’t he be like, a kid? Razor gives his necklaces to the ring attendant: Anthony Chimmel. I had no idea he was around back at this point. Jarrett takes a toothpick to the eye and complains about it to kill time.

Armdrag takes Razor down to start. We’re starting very, very slowly here. Jarrett does the lay on the turnbuckle thing that Shawn did better. They exchange slaps as this is dragging pretty badly. Razor gets the fallaway slam for two as Jeff gets his foot on the ropes. He works on the arm but gets caught by a pair of dropkicks. Make it three of them for Jarrett to take over. He always had a gorgeous dropkick.

Top rope cross body is rolled through though but Jarrett takes back over easily. Hey look it’s a chinlock. Glad to see that they’re keeping things different throughout these three matches they’ve had at this show so far. Razor gets a backslide for two as even Gorilla says he’s not going to get him here. Apparently the fat guy is named Ranger Danger. Belly to back suplex by Razor puts both guys down. Crowd is pretty dead here but not entirely dead.

Back up and a discus punch puts Jeff down. Razor is sent to the floor and looks to be cut open a bit. Wait maybe he isn’t. Ok yes he is. His hair was covering up the cut the second time. Back in and there’s ANOTHER countout. They did that at I think the 95 Rumble which hadn’t happened yet so I guess this is practice.

Rating: D. Another one of these stop and go matches that wasn’t interesting in the slightest. I still don’t get the ranger dude being out there but it was a much more confusing era back then. These two could have a great match when they tried to but this wasn’t the case here. Not much at all and really bad to say the least.

Jeff wants to keep going and Razor says sure. And there’s the Razor’s Edge maybe 8 seconds later. They couldn’t have done this without the countout??? I give up.

Bushwhackers vs. Well Dunn

Well Dunn was a jobbing heel tag team that no one cared about but for some reason they were given a moderate push around this time. Also, the Whackers had jobs at this point? Really? The Bushwhackers were doing this weird nose rub thing around this time that was stupider than what they would usually do if you can imagine that. They stall forever before we actually get going.

Butch bites one of them and they do the do-see-do. A gymnastic comedy routine gets us nowhere. Apparently one is named Timothy Well. We haven’t even had a bell yet so we’re just having a big brawl here. We’re not in Albany anymore. The heels get run out of the ring and it’s time for some whacking. We get a reference to Tie Me Kangaroo Down, which was the theme song of Outback Jack. How did I not get him for OCW?

Believe it or not this match is clipped, meaning it was originally longer than it is here. The heels beat on Luck for awhile with some fast leg drops. This match is about as uninteresting as you could ask for if you didn’t get that already. Flying forearm takes Luke down for one. More double teaming follows. Well Dunn is managed by Harvey Whippleman. Butch (called Miller which I’ve never heard) comes in. Dunn’s first name is Stephen. Battering Ram, heel reversal, face reversal, pin, same ending as the other tag match.

Rating: F+. Again, this was CLIPPED. It was originally supposed to be even longer than it already was. We saw about five minutes of it and the match was boring beyond belief based on that. This is one of the worst tapes I’ve ever seen so far and we have a full 54 minutes to go at this point. Shoot me, please?

The next match is one that was on Shawn’s tape so I’m copying and pasting this.

Shawn Michaels/Diesel/Tatanka vs. Smoking Guns/Lex Luger

This has to be after Summerslam 94 but before Survivor Series 94 as Tatanka is a heel and in the Million Dollar Corporation here but Diesel and Shawn are still tag champions. Luger is the Rebel here, meaning he means absolutely nothing here because his main push is long since over. DiBiase isn’t here for some reason.

Gorilla is all over Tatanka for selling out to DiBiase. Shawn vs. Luger to start us off. I don’t remember any feud with the champions and the Guns but there likely was one. Luger destroys Shawn to start and the good guys clear the ring in a hurry. It’s so strange to see Billy Gunn as a worthless cowboy. Off to Bart vs. Diesel now which is rather amusing indeed. Why is it amusing? I’m not sure but it just is.

Diesel thankfully destroys that mullet wearing twerp and brings in Tatanka. Bart fights back but kind of messes up a dropkick as Tatanka is too close to him. The Guns hit a modified Sidewinder (side slam mixed with a top rope leg drop) to Tatanka and we go back to Shawn vs. Lex again. Luger still wants the stereotype but can’t get him since that’s the big segment of the match probably.

Luger stays in for all of 6 seconds before bringing the tired Bart back in. Did he tick someone off to deserve this? Bad armdrag brings Shawn down but Diesel pulls the top rope down to give the evildoers the advantage. Bart gets beaten down for awhile as we’re just waiting on the big brawl segment to end the match.

Shawn comes back in and we hit the chinlock. Stan Lane is blowing Gorilla away on commentary here. Shawn calls spots to Gorilla so Gorilla covers for him by saying he’s taunting. That makes sense if nothing else. A mat slam gets Bart out of trouble and the FEARSOME Billy comes in and Shawn cowers in fear which I think is a cover for wanting to laugh.

Billy gets the Texas Special (bulldog) off the top on Shawn for two and here’s the big brawl. The feuds (I guess) split off with Luger and Tatanka on the floor. Shawn gets tied in the ropes so Diesel hits the Jackknife on Billy (serves his annoying ass right) and Shawn covers for the academic pin.

Rating: C-. Pretty boring for the most part but nothing too bad. It’s about what you would expect for the main event of a comp tape as Shawn steals another pin. Decent little match for the most part with not a ton of people caring but it wasn’t supposed to be anything epic. Not bad.

Well that killed off ten minutes so there’s that at least.

WWF World Title: Bret Hart vs. Owen Hart

Lumberjack match here. Come on Harts: SAVE US! The lumberjacks are as usual the medium names on the roster and the majority of the upper midcard. Gorilla can’t tell if the kid that got the glasses was a boy or a girl. That amuses me for some reason. Atomic drop and a DDT for Bret as they’re starting very fast. This is before Summerslam and their cage match apparently.

Owen is sent to the floor but takes over soon thereafter. He locks on a camel clutch despite not being Middle Eastern. Doesn’t he know his stereotypes? We shift to a chinlock since it’s been a full five minutes since one of those. Jarrett gets involved and the lumberjacks get involved. Sharpshooter goes on Owen but Neidhart drills Bret. Owen covers Bret….AND PINS HIM??? He’s announced as the new champion and the heels celebrate! WHAT THE HECK???

And never mind as the referees come down to tell what happened and I think you all know what’s coming here. We actually go to instant replay here and the referee sees what happened. Bah I wanted to see the mystery Owen title reign! Naturally the match is restarted even though Owen looks good with the title on his shoulder.

We restart things and Bret sends him shoulder first into the post to take over. Oh look: IT’S A CHINLOCK! Bret, you too? Cross body gets two for the champion. Wait is Owen officially champion at this point? I’m not really sure. Either way it’s back to the chinlock. Headbutt to the ribs gives Owen control and stomps away a bit. Oh and his arm is fine now.

Bret gets sent to the floor and the heels mess with him a bit. Dropkick sends Bret to the floor again and the beating is on again. Suplex gets two. How can Bret vs. Owen be boring like this? Bret fights back but gets caught by a tombstone for two. A top rope headbutt/splash misses for Owen and both guys are down.

Owen is sent into the corner and Bret adds a legdrop for two. Russian Leg Sweep gets two. Gorilla doesn’t know why he’s not going for the Sharpshooter yet. Gorilla, he’s done two of the Five Moves of Doom. If he went for it already he might destroy the universe. Gorilla Monsoon wants to destroy the universe. Elbow gets two. Anvil gets on the apron and Owen accidentally drills him so Bret can roll him up for the pin to retain.

Rating: B-. The match is ok but compared to their other stuff this is pretty weak. The title switch was indeed a nice shock and I’m glad they went with it at the beginning rather than at the end. Not a bad match but dude, it’s Bret vs. Owen. How is that not a guaranteed classic? Whatever I guess, as it’s easily the best match on the tape so far.

Women’s Title: Bull Nakano vs. Alundra Blayze

Nakano was more or less the Kong of her day. These two had a very long running feud that actually gave us some good matches. Blayze speeds it up a bit and fires away with kicks so Nakano grabs her by the hair and spins her around in a single throw. FREAKING OW MAN! Leg drop gets one. After a short beating Blayze gets a clothesline using the top rope. That’s the extent of her offense as she gets slammed off the top and a Piledriver gets two for the challenger.

Off to a half crab/ankle lock as Nakano shouts ASK HER! It’s a reverse figure four now with Blayze facing down but Nakanko facing up. I’ve seen that before but it’s rare. Nakano is destroying her with all kinds of holds here. Suplex gets two as the crowd is SILENT. Blayze bridges up and holds said bridge despite the huge Nakano jumping down onto her ribs. That’s impressive indeed.

This has more or less been a squash so far so I’d bet a lot on Nakano losing to a German suplex. A cross body takes Nakano down but Luna Vachon, Nakano’s friend I guess, distracts her and a DDT gets two for Bull. Crucifix gets two for Alundra. Sunset flip is countered by the power of a large ass for two. Powerbomb gets two as they’ve sped this way up. Superplex is blocked by Bull (called Dumbo by Gorilla) but her guillotine legdrop finisher misses. Three dropkicks by the champions get two. And yep there’s the German out of nowhere to end it.

Rating: C+. Hey what do you know about that? Blayze got her ass handed to her for 10 minutes and then hit one move to get the win. Never at all been a fan of this style of booking as it makes the champion look really weak. The pin was clean though so points for that. Also, Bull was doing some insane stuff out there so I have to give this a good grade.

Battle Royal

20 people in this and I’d assume it’s the main event. Let’s see how many I can name: Bigelow, Yokozuna, Mabel, Typhoon…yeah this is a waste of my time. I’ll let you know as they go out. Immediately, as in less than 15 seconds after we start, they gang up on Yoko and he’s gone. IRS, the Heavenly Bodies, Backlund (pre-crazy), Headshrinkers, Smoking Gunns, 1-2-3 Kid, Adam Bomb and Jeff Jarrett are all in there. Yoko pulled out Fatu (Headshrinker) with him.

Kwang (Savio Vega in a Japanese monster gimmick) is in there too. Sparky Plugg (Hardcore Holly) is in there. I think that’s everyone. Oh and Diesel is in it too. Duke Droese is in it. I’m missing one guy. Blast it I hate when that happens. Oh it’s Nikolai Volkoff. That’s much better. Yes Volkoff made things better. That’ll never happen again.

Standard battle royal so far with the guys kicking and punching on the ropes. There goes Typhoon as we’re down to 17 I think. Diesel and Mabel go at it in a preview of the worst PPV main event of all time. Backlund puts Tom Pritchard (Heavenly Bodies) out. That leaves us with sixteen I believe. Bigelow misses a clothesline to put us down to 15. Backlund puts out another one, this time Bart Gunn.

Kid slips back under the ropes and tries to put out Kwang but this is pre-99 so he can’t beat giants yet. We hit another time freeze and as I type that Kwang and Adam Bomb go out to thin the ranks out a bit. I think we have 12 yet but that’s just a head count. I don’t see Nikolai. Diesel puts Mabel out and I think we have ten left. The fans chant for Diesel. There’s a reason he would be world champion in less than 3 months.

And just like that everyone gangs up on Diesel and he’s gone. I count 9 at this point: IRS, Holly, Droese, Backlund, Samu, Billy Gunn, Del Ray (Heavenly Body), Jarrett and the Kid. Just after I unpause the video to count them, Lane lists them off. Blast it. Oh well the tape is almost over so I can’t complain. Jarrett throws Holly out. He and IRS team up a bit and get rid of Droese.

Del Ray goes over but doesn’t hit the floor in a nice save. Irwin is out as is Del Ray, leaving us with Kid, Gunn, Backlund, Samu and Jarrett. Everyone other than Kid is on the ropes and then all four others put Samu out. The final four are Jarrett, Backlund, Billy and Kid. Sorry if I missed some eliminations but they weren’t mentioned and the camera missed them too.

Jarrett dumps Billy to get us down to three. Kid goes up top but lands on the apron and sends Jarrett out to get us down to the 1-2-3 Kid and Bob Backlund. PLEASE let Backlund win! He gets the Crossface Chickenwing on as he’s snapping again. Yep there goes the Kid and Backlund gets the win. He’s SCARY with those insane eyes.

Rating: D. I wasn’t too thrilled with this. Backlund winning wasn’t that bad but getting there indeed was. This was just incredibly boring the entire time with nothing interesting happening at all. With all the missed eliminations and the lack of star power (for the time at least) this really didn’t do anything for me in the slightest. Pretty bad match.

Overall Rating: F. Oh thank goodness this is finally over. This is easily one of the worst tapes I’ve ever sat through, which is saying a lot given that there are two Bret matches on here. I even gave some matches some ok grades, but that’s not saying much. Even the good matches are just barely ok at best with even Bret vs. Owen being dull. Boring tape that I had to pause about three dozen times to watch something more interesting. I think it was called Wrestlemania 11? Anyway, terrible, and I mean TERRIBLE, tape.