Thunder- November 18, 1999: Benoit Does It Again

Thunder
Date: November 18, 1999
Location: Allen County War Memorial, Fort Wayne, Indiana
Attendance: 3,283
Commentators: Scott Hudson, Larry Zbyszko

We’re three days away from Mayhem and the interesting thing this week is can they keep up the wrestling on this show. Thunder has definitely become the wrestling show, with matches getting more time than Nitro gets most of the time, but with less star power and more bad interference. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Jerry Flynn vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

Hardcore so Bigelow brings out some weapons but Flynn takes him away and nails Bigelow with a trashcan. Barbarian is out here with Flynn, despite Jerry beating him in an impromptu boiler room brawl Monday. Norman Smiley comes out but Hart sends Knobbs and Barbarian after him. Without noticing what’s going on outside, Bigelow takes Flynn down with a clothesline. Thankfully he didn’t ruin the mullet.

Time for the cookie sheet shots followed by the can lids crashing around Flynn’s head like cymbals. The flying headbutt misses though and Jerry hits something like a Van Daminator with the trashcan. Barbarian comes in like a schnook and gets beaten down, followed by a chair to Flynn to give Bigelow the three count.

Rating: D. There was nothing to this one other than Hart and Smiley shouting at each other a lot. That was the most entertaining part of the match, which is likely due to the idea of taking two entertaining guys and letting them entertain. This is different than Flynn who is there because he knows karate and Bigelow, who could be entertaining but not in a mess like this.

Disco can’t get anyone to give him action on a bet for a match tonight.

Bagwell is looking for Chris Benoit.

Disco Inferno vs. Prince Iaukea

Non-title and Iaukea has new gear. Not interesting gear of course but it’s new with some trunks and boots. Disco goes to the eyes to start but Iaukea smacks him in the back of the head. I’ll give WCW 1999 this much: their heels had great hair. After begging off, Disco sends him into the corner and takes over with all of his usual stuff. A clothesline and middle rope elbow get two each on the Prince.

Iaukea’s sunset flip doesn’t work and Disco stays on him with elbows and chokes, followed by a chinlock to keep the fans bored. Iaukea comes back with an even less interesting offense (the high spot is a dropkick) until Disco drops him with a DDT. Thankfully for a change, we get silly as a messenger brings Disco a package. Inside is…..a fish? Oh I get it: sleep with the fishes. The distraction lets Iaukea grab a rollup for the pin.

Rating: F. Is it bad that I want to see where the fish story is going? I know it’s the mafia gambling stuff but it’s more entertaining than most other stuff going on with this promotion. What isn’t interesting however is the really dull wrestling in this match as neither guy knows how to keep an audience. Disco is nothing great but at least he has something unique with the dancing. Iaukea…..what in the world do they see in him to keep him on the payroll?

Post match, Disco hits Iaukea with the fish. Remember that he has a title defense three days from now.

Evan Karagias says he’s going to beat Savage for the love of his woman.

Van Hammer asks Curt Hennig to get counted out tonight and a fight breaks out. This story is one of the worst in the company and that covers a lot of ground.

Evan Karagias vs. The Maestro

The bubbles in Maestro’s entrance are always odd to see. Maestro grabs a quick headlock to start and nails a shoulder. Evan comes back with a cross body but rolls outside to kiss Madusa. The delay works for a bit but Maestro comes back by raising a boot in the corner. Some forearms and a belly to back suplex get two on Evan as this is just a step ahead of the previous match.

More uppercuts set up a German suplex but Evan flips over the back and gets two of his own off a snap suplex. Madusa has to play cheerleader despite looking about 20 years older than she really is here. A spinebuster puts Evan down but Madusa gets on the apron and kisses Maestro. Evan kicks him down and checks on Madusa (who didn’t seem to mind), allowing Maestro to roll him up for the pin.

Rating: D-. Boring wrestling, uninteresting characters, Madusa being a focus for reasons not exactly clear and the #1 contender to the Cruiserweight Title losing about ten minutes after the champion lost. The wrestling on this show isn’t great, but the booking continues to be the real problem dragging this down. I guess they’re setting it up that Evan is distracted by Madusa, but when the champion loses earlier in the night and Evan has never really done anything, the story is a huge mess.

The Revolution talks about Torrie being a Barbie doll. Shane wants to see Asya rip her apart, sending Saturn into a rant about taking the limbs off a Barbie. Shane: “Perry, IT WAS A FIGURE OF SPEECH!” Saturn: “My point exactly!”

Disco is panicking on the phone with Tony Marinara.

Benoit heard that Bagwell is looking for him. He leaves a few seconds before Bagwell shows up.

Nitro recap video, complete with Sid’s half the brain line.

La Parka and Kaz Hayashi have another overdubbed interview with Hayashi sounding like he’s from rural Georgia. I think these predated Kaientai’s INDEED promos but they’re around the same time.

Buff and Benoit finally get together with Bagwell asking Benoit not to use the suplexes or the Crossface on the bad neck. Benoit says Buff knew what he was getting into and they brawl.

Kaz Hayashi/La Parka vs. El Dandy/Silver King

Kaz has his own chair and even the announcers have to mention the dubbed voices. Dandy gets flipped around while trying to backslide Kaz so it’s quickly off to La Parka vs. King. La Parka does his dance so King dropkicks him in the face and everything quickly breaks down. King and Dandy are headscissored to the floor and the fans are actually behind Kaz and Parka here. Dandy comes in and tries a right hand but hits his partner by mistake. After the calamity calms down, Kaz gets whipped into a gutbuster as we settle into a more standard formula.

A double slam gets two on Kaz but Dandy lets him walk over for the tag to La Parka. Things speed up with Silver coming in to help Dandy as the heels take over again. La Parka is sent to the floor so Kaz comes in, only to get tripped down a few seconds later. The heels screw up with King hitting Dandy, allowing Kaz to tag La Parka again. Everything breaks down with La Parka hitting a missile dropkick and Kaz adding a high cross body to King. La Parka’s kind of Whisper in the Wind is enough to pin King.

Rating: C-. This got messy in the middle but I like the idea of La Parka and Kaz being these guys who can barely speak English but suddenly have the dubbed voices. I’m fine with these decent nothing matches on Thunder though, as they’re clean enough to not make my head hurt and long enough to quality as a match instead of an angle. It doesn’t mean anything after the match ends but at least it was decent while it lasted.

La Parka chairs King post match.

Bagwell and Hennig get in a fight over something we don’t hear.

Curt Hennig vs. Van Hammer

Larry goes on a rant against the term “Powers That Be”. I kind of agree as WCW has announced that they’re Russo and Ferrara so why not just go with that? Curt knees Hammer on the way in but gets thrown outside for a brawl. To keep up the stupidity of this show, we see a sign saying “I’m only here for the Nitro Girls.” Maybe Russo is on to something about the fans being morons. Back in and Hennig starts in on the leg as Bagwell strolls out to follow up on a five minute old angle. All the oil on Buff’s arms distracts Hennig so Hammer can get in a cheap shot and snap his throat across the top rope.

Curt goes after Buff but catches Hammer trying to jump him from behind with a kick to the ribs. Back in and Hennig slams Hammer’s head against the mat as Buff plays cheerleader for Hammer. Apparently it works as Hammer comes back with a knee in the corner followed by a DDT, only to miss a middle rope flip dive. Curt is sent outside for a brawl with Bagwell, only to have Benoit come out and get sent into the barricade. Back up and Hammer is accidentally whipped into Buff, allowing Curt to hit the HennigPlex for the pin.

Rating: D-. I need a minute here. Let’s try to figure this out. So the Powers That Be want to get rid of Hennig by saying he’s gone as soon as he gets pinned, because a submission isn’t good enough for them for whatever reason. At the same time, they want to screw with Bagwell by making him job all the time because wrestling is scripted, but Bagwell wants to rebel and win his REAL matches.

Now he’s screwing with Hennig to get rid of him, presumably as a favor to the Powers That Be to get them off Bagwell’s back? At the same time, Benoit is involved despite being in the final four of the World Title tournament because they have nothing better to do with him tonight and there’s NO ONE else they could throw into this mess? The fact that I had to write out two paragraphs to understand this story, ignoring the fact that it completely exposes the business, sums up Russo’s booking in a nutshell: A stupid midcard feud took that long to understand and I don’t even care now that I’ve figured it out.

Luger works out as Chavo sells Liz Amway jewelery. THIS story gets to continue but we’re not likely to hear any more about La Parka and Kaz.

Lash Leroux vs. Kenny Kaos

Leroux takes him down to start but Kaos kicks him in the ribs and scores with a butterfly suplex. After a middle rope legdrop gets two, Lash botches a flip over the back but takes over anyway. Why let something like a big mishap screw up your quick match right? Kaos comes back with a boot to the face and a bunch of kicks and punches in the corner.

A gutwrench suplex gets two for Kaos but Lash comes back with a Russian legsweep and stomps of his own. Kaos is sent outside but Lash baseball slides into his leg to really take over. The leg is fine enough to catch a diving Cajun though and drive him back first into the barricade. So he’s generic and doesn’t sell. Back in and Lash escapes a slam and hits Whiplash for the pin.

Rating: D. In the old days, this would be filler on Saturday Night but now it’s one of the later shows on Thunder. It really is apparent that no one cared about this show and they were clearly just filling in time. Again, I’d love to know what someone was high on when they picked Kaos to be a champion a year ago. That stuff could make me a fortune on the streets.

The Animals brag about Torrie being a martial arts expert. I smell an unfunny comedy bit coming up.

Vampiro wraps a chain around his hand.

Chavo Guerrero Jr. vs. Barbarian

Chavo comes out with his order forms for Barbarian, but Barbarian hits him in the back with the briefcase, setting up the Kick of Fear for the pin at 8 seconds.

Post match, Barbarian says he’ll pay Chavo later. Well, at least it’s something for Chavo to do. Stupid yes but something.

Tournament recap.

Liz and Luger watch Meng from a monitor.

Meng vs. Vampiro

Vampiro gets taken down by the hair to start, which you would expect to have been the other way around. Meng loses a kick-off but Vampiro stupidly tries a headbutt. Well no one ever accused him of being smart. Now Meng headbutts the buckle but doesn’t seem to phase it. A bunch of chops stagger Vampiro and Meng nails a decent dropkick. I remember Jesse Ventura freaking out when Haku hit those and I can’t say I disagree.

Vampiro gets piledriven and sent to the floor for a whip into the barricade. Back inside and Meng is finally put down by a top rope spinwheel kick. That’s the extent of Vampiro’s offense though as his hurricanrana is countered with a powerbomb. Jerry Only of the Misfits comes in and takes the Tongan Death Grip and that’s the match, presumably for a no contest.

Rating: D+. Meng is one of those guys that is kind of fun to watch, just due to him no selling almost everything and hurting as many people as he did. Unfortunately he’s being set up with Luger, which is about as dull of a program as you can have. The ending here did nothing for anyone, but that really shouldn’t be surprising.

Liz comes out to apologize to Meng and the monster is nice enough to stop lunging at her with the Death Grip as Luger is late with his cue. He finally shows up and chairs Meng down before crushing his knees with the chair.

Chris Benoit vs. Buff Bagwell

Ever the genius, Buff tries to slide under the ropes and gets stomped down. Chris takes over with a dropkick and a knee to the ribs but gets dropped ribs first onto the top rope. They head outside with Buff dropping Benoit’s throat across the barricade before stomping away. Back inside and Buff keeps up the stomping motif as this is actually one of the more entertaining matches of the night due to the charisma both guys have. Buff wasn’t much in the ring but he had some energy to him.

A neckbreaker sets up a chinlock on Chris as I guess Buff is a heel all of a sudden. They trade punches and chops in the corner before Benoit takes it to the floor to give Bagwell the beating he deserves. Back in and Benoit hits the snap suplex and puts on a surfboard before “accidentally” kicking Buff low. They head outside again with Buff getting whipped into the barricade but Benoit makes the same mistake Buff made at the start and lets Bagwell get in some shops as he comes in.

Buff hammers away but has to grab the ropes to block a German suplex. That’s fine with Benoit as he plows through Buff with a clothesline, only to miss the Swan Dive. Buff goes up for the Blockbuster but here’s Hennig to break it up, allowing Benoit to slap on the Crossface for the win.

Rating: C+. So to recap, Benoit has gotten two of the longest matches of the Russo Era and has put in two of the best performances to date. Aside from Benoit being awesome, a lot of it goes to show that when you give the guys a chance to show what they can do, you more often than not get a good match. You can’t do anything with two minutes and three plot devices at a time.

Benoit stares at Hennig and leaves, allowing Curt and Buff to brawl to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. They had something here with the self contained story of Bagwell/Benoit/Hennig ending with a match but I can’t imagine this is going to be a recurring theme. Other than that though, this was your usual disaster with nonsensical ideas and booking decisions that seem to be more there for the amusement of Russo and Ferrara than anything else. I have no desire to see Mayhem more than I did two hours ago though, so the show was a waste of time.

No show next week due to Thanksgiving.

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Thunder – November 11, 1999: By Jove They’re Getting Better!

Thunder
Date: November 11, 1999
Location: Allen County War Memorial, Fort Wayne, Indiana
Attendance: 3,283
Commentators: Scott Hudson, Larry Zbyszko

We’re closing in on Mayhem and I’m losing my will to fight. Thankfully this is a live show meaning it’s only going to be mostly horrible instead of the scum of the earth that it can be when it’s taped. One of the few good things about Russo TV is the matches are short so the horrors don’t go on as long. Let’s get to it.

One more note: of those 3,283 in attendance, 1,771 were paid. The WWF ran a house show at the same venue about seven months earlier and drew over 7,700 paid. The building’s capacity for a basketball game at the time: 10,240.

Opening sequence.

Lash Leroux vs. Evan Karagias

Disco comes out for commentary, which will be a running theme tonight. For Nitro: Evan vs. referee Johnny Boone, who is working this match. Why? Actually I was hoping you knew. Feeling out process with Evan taking Lash down for a headlock but Leroux uses the ropes for a break. Evan starts arguing with Boone, so here’s Madusa because the opening match on Thunder needs this many storylines. They start some basic wrestling to fill in time before the next story and Lash is clotheslined to the floor.

Cue the story as Disco hits on Madusa. That thankfully goes nowhere and Evan hammers on Lash, only to have Leroux flip out of a belly to back suplex and grab a Russian legsweep for two. Another suplex puts Evan down as Disco says he’s going to seal the deal with Madusa. Evan fights back with some chops and wins a slugout before getting two off a Thesz press. Instead of following up though, he goes after Disco for hitting on Madusa, who slaps Disco as she sees Evan. As he heads back inside, Leroux nails Whiplash for the pin.

Rating: D. This ran 4:34 and managed to fit all that nonsense in there. How in the world do they think this is the best course of action for the opening match? I have no idea who I was supposed to cheer for out there or what I’m supposed to focus on, but I’m pretty sure it’s not the wrestling.

Disco laughs at Evan and says he’ll bet $25,000 that he can beat Karagias at Mayhem. Madusa helps Evan up, whispers in his ear and kisses him. Evan accepts and Disco is given another Whiplash.

Gene asks Berlyn why he stopped dancing, earning him a hand over his mouth and a threat. Were we really not supposed to realize that was Wright until now?

Sid is looking for Rick Steiner.

Berlyn vs. Curly Bill

My goodness. Of all the things in WCW, THIS is the thing that gets a blowoff??? Curly is announced from South Pittsburgh, Texas. Berlyn hammers him in the corner as you would expect but Curly slips out of an attempt at a slam. Cue one of the Misfits to tell Berlyn to come out back for a fight, but the Bodyguard goes instead. Not that it matters as Vampiro comes in to jump Berlyn for the DQ. See, this is one of those things where a simple tweak would have been fine. Why not have Berlyn get a quick pin on Bill and THEN do the angle? Would that have really hurt anything?

Post match, Curly covers Berlyn and counts his own three, so the Bodyguard comes in and throws him out. Thanks for wasting that extra bit of time guys.

Gene talks to La Parka and Silver King. La Parka speaks English here, on orders from the Powers That Be. His English is actually fine, making me wonder why in the world he’s never used it before. The guy was over, he was fine in the ring and apparently he could talk so wh……oh right it’s WCW. Or that wasn’t La Parka under the mask, which is always a possibility.

Chavo tries to sell Amway products to a Villano. OH COME ON. They’re making a throwaway line into an angle?

Rick Steiner rants about Sid dumping him for the Outsiders so Sid nails him. Security breaks it up and I guess that’s our next HUGE match.

La Parka/Silver King vs. Lizmark Jr./Villano V

Before the match, La Parka talks about learning promos but still getting stuck in these lame matches. His lips don’t move so maybe I don’t have to be so annoyed at WCW for not pushing him. Well not really as he was good enough to be pushed harder but at least the talking wasn’t as big of a deal. It sounded like Ed Ferrara this time. Everyone jumps La Parka for what he said and he starts with Lizmark. A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker puts La Parka down and Lizmark taunts King into the ring for a beatdown on the skeleton guy. King gets back at him with a knee to the spine and it’s off to King and Villano.

King slams Villano down and does a dance (he’s no Big Wiggler) before tagging La Parka back in. Villano avoids a dropkick and Lizmark throws La Parka to the floor for a suicide dive. With his partner in trouble, King busts out the yet to be named 619 to taunt Lizmark before sidestepping a charging Villano. Now it’s King diving on everyone before what appeared to be an edit sends La Parka back to the ring. As in he was on the floor and a split second later he was on the mat. Lizmark misses a top rope backsplash and gets caught by La Parka’s corkscrew dive for the pin.

Rating: C-. Totally standard lucha tag with nothing interesting and the clipping being more distracting than anything else. So much for the show being live too. One might think they’re going somewhere with the La Parka stuff, but if he never gets near the title scene, none of it is going to mean much.

Post match La Parka chairs Lizmark and Villano.

Berlyn and the Bodyguard beat up Curly Bill in the back. This thing is continuing???

Hennig says he isn’t losing and going anywhere.

Chavo sells a childless Kaz Hayashi a bunch of diapers. I think this speaks for itself.

Recap of Nitro.

Booker says he and the woman from Nitro go back a long way. More on this later I’m assuming, but we might have to see Chavo selling stuff again.

Sid stares at Rick Steiner on a monitor. Steiner doesn’t seem to know that there’s a camera on him.

Disco is on the phone and says he’ll have their money. Maybe he can get some additional money if he gets rid of Hennig.

TV Title: Rick Steiner vs. Booker T.

Steiner is defending and hammers Booker down in the corner to start. Back up and Booker ducks a Steinerline and hits the flying forearm and a side kick. They have to get all their stuff in though as this match isn’t likely to break five minutes. Steiner comes back with two straight belly to belly suplexes (check those off the list too) and clubbing forearms before we hit the chinlock. Booker quickly fights up with his series of kicks but Steiner shoves the referee in front of the missile dropkick. Cue Sid to shove Steiner off the top and plant him with a powerbomb to give Booker the pin!

Rating: D+. And never mind as this happens.

Other referee Johnny Boone comes out and we’ve got a Dusty Finish. Sid powerbombs both referees and brawls with Steiner. The match was nothing special and your standard angle disguised as a wrestling match.

Curt Hennig vs. Dean Malenko

Douglas is on commentary and Hennig is fired if he gets pinned. I believe this is the third week where we still have no explanation for why that’s the stipulation. They do some of that wrestling nonsense to start with Dean grabbing an armbar before opting to hammer away in the corner. You can see his soul dying with every punch. Curt gets two each off a sunset flip, backslide and rollup as he tries to keep his job.

Malenko bails to the floor before heading back inside, only to get punched in the face to send him back outside. Back in again and Dean grabs a quick belly to back before putting on a chinlock. Curt comes back with his usual but Dean hits a very unusual (for him anyway) low blow but gets small packaged to counter the Cloverleaf. Back up and Malenko misses a charge in the corner, only to have Asya distract the referee so Shane can hit Hennig with the cast.

This brings out Disco Inferno as Malenko covers off a suplex. Disco shoves Malenko off and covers Hennig but Curt gets up and hits Inferno. Dean suplexes Hennig again for two but Benoit runs out for the Swan Dive on Malenko as Disco keeps everyone else at bay, giving Hennig the pin.

Rating: C-. It’s kind of interesting that you have easily the best wrestling match of the night going on when they have a nonsensical run-in followed by a more sensible run-in to end the whole thing. As many people have said before: Russo did not know how a wrestling match was supposed to go so he watered it down into something he did understand and the wrestling fans suffered as a result. It’s so sad to see Dean clearly just there because he has to be and doing things he doesn’t want to do. You can see how miserable he is out there and I completely understand him leaving soon.

Rick Steiner and Sid fight.

Maestro is ready for his match with Brian Knobbs tonight and promises to go heavy metal if necessary. Well he’s already below Van Hammer so it can’t hurt.

Knobbs and Hart aren’t happy with Norman Smiley. I am as he’s one of the funniest things on the shows lately.

Maestro vs. Brian Knobbs

Hardcore. Smiley comes out for commentary with a violin case to distract Knobbs but it doesn’t work so well (imagine, mind games not working on Knobbs) as Brian nails Maestro with a trashcan a few times. It’s cookie sheet time but a chair shot doesn’t work as well as Maestro scores with a dropkick. Maestro gets in some basic weapons shots but Jimmy Hart grabs his leg, allowing Brian to take over again.

Smiley yells at Hart to scare him off and the guys in the ring trade more basic weapons shots. There’s not much to say here other than “Knobbs hits Maestro, Maestro hits Knobbs, Knobbs and Maestro are hitting each other.” They head outside where Smiley goes after Jimmy to distract Knobbs, allowing Norman to hit Brian with a pipe. Maestro rolls Knobbs up for the pin.

Rating: D-. I just sat through five minutes of Maestro to set up a Norman Smiley vs. Brian Knobbs match. This is what I’ve come to in my life. It’s also proof that there’s more to this kind of stuff than just hitting people with weapons. People remember Road Dogg, Al Snow and Crash doing the same weak spots because they did them with some charisma and other creative spots to go with it. Also it helped when they did things outside the ring area but that could go horribly for WCW. Anyway, match was as bad as you would expect it to be.

We look at Malenko beating Mysterio on Nitro.

Tag Team Titles: Kidman/Konnan vs. Barbarian/Jerry Flynn

I’m assuming this is a title match with Kidman and Konnan defending in case you’re really new at this. Torrie is in a backless green top and even Barbarian seems to notice her. After far too many catchphrases and unintelligible gibberish from the Animals, Flynn goes outside to hit on Torrie and gets slapped in the face. She’s not into mullets I guess. Eddie goes after Flynn and gets both himself and Torrie ejected. There goes the interest in the match. As this is going on, Konnan and Kidman double team Barbarian with Kidman getting two off a middle rope Thesz press.

Barbarian shoves him out of the corner though and it’s off to Flynn for a spinwheel kick. Yes Jerry Flynn is throwing kicks people. I’m stunned too. A belly to belly gets two on Kidman before it’s off to Barbarian for a headbutt and a powerbomb, putting him on the same list as Lodi and Sid. Now there are three names you’ll probably never see together again. Barbarian misses a top rope headbutt but catches Kidman on top with a huge belly to belly superplex. Cool move actually. Everything breaks down and Kidman hits a high cross body to pin Barbarian.

Rating: C. This was WAY better than I was expecting but that might be due to it being so simple. The Animals were never in any danger but you have two guys get in some decent looking offense on them and it’s a nice little match. I still stand by my theory that Barbarian is very underrated. The guy kept getting steady work for over ten years and had some good looking power moves. He was a great role player and nothing more but he was good at what he did.

Luger says he meant to mace Goldberg on Monday and promises to make it up to Sting. The fact that these two are in a feud in 1999 tells you almost everything you need to know about where this company is heading.

Video on the Nitro Girls civil war. They really think we remember which of these are which?

The Revolution says they’re not done. Saturn starts talking about the Beatles so Malenko asks him who writes his promos. In an actually funny reply, Saturn pulls out a notebook and says “I do! I’ve got a hundred of them!” That one caught me by surprise. Well done.

Total Package vs. Kaz Hayashi

During the entrances, Norman Smiley vs. Jimmy Hart is announced for Nitro. Yes, that’s a match they want to advertise in advance. Luger comes out with a knee brace and street clothes on, saying he’s wrestled over 3,000 matches in thirteen years and won’t be able to compete on this knee. Kaz is annoyed that Luger mispronounces his name and calls him a chicken so the fight is on. A suplex, choking and a clothesline set up the Rack to end this in less than a minute and a half. Total squash.

Luger holds his knee post match. There’s nothing wrong with a good old fake injury.

Sid Vicious vs. Perry Saturn

Sid shoves him down to start and nails a clothesline as Shane Douglas jumps in on commentary again. Saturn’s cross body is countered into a backbreaker as we seem to already be in squash mode. Malenko offers a distraction but gets stared down, only to have Saturn dive on his stable mate by mistake. So Sid is so insane that he makes the other wrestlers make mistakes?

After being dropped on the barricade, Saturn grabs a quick t-bone suplex back inside, followed by a springboard leg for two. A springboard forearm staggers Sid again but he kicks Saturn in the face to take over. Saturn kicks him low to break up the chokeslam, only to jump into it a second later. Powerbomb is good for the pin.

Rating: D-. Oh sweet mother of goodness they’re turning Sid face aren’t they? I know it’s been hinted at all night but he’s wrestling this match as the good guy. Just…..no people. I know he’s insane and the crowd likes him but I can’t just forget all the matches he messed up, ruining Benoit’s push and EVERYTHING ELSE he’s done in the last few months to accept him as a face now.

I rant and rave about a lot of things WCW does but this actually bugs me. Sid needs to do WAY more than fight Rick Steiner (after turning on Steiner like a heel would. So yes, Rick Steiner should be the face in this feud and good night does that sound wrong to say) to be forgiven for what he’s done in the last few months but this is the new WCW I guess.

Sid teases powerbombs on Malenko and Asya but has to fight off an invading Rick Steiner to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. Somehow this was one of the better shows of the Russo run so far. It’s another meaningless show with no connection to most of the main stories, but now we get a SID face push. I can tolerate these shows a lot more easily than Nitro as it’s shorter and less insane, but it doesn’t mean they’re fun to watch.

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Thunder – October 7, 1999: Benoit’s Limit

Thunder
Date: October 7, 1999
Location: UTC Arena, Chattanooga, Tennessee
Attendance: 2,411
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Larry Zbyszko

Back to this disaster again as it’s we’re still getting close to Halloween Havoc and the question this week is what can Goldberg do to Sid’s car now. Actually the question would be why is this the best they can come up with. Russo and Ferrara aren’t in charge at this point, so this might actually be the last taped event (save for Saturday Night with its insane schedule but who cares about that show at this point?) before they took over. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Dean Malenko vs. Blitzkrieg

Blitzkrieg has new attire. This could be interesting, especially if Malenko stretches him for doing too many ridiculous flips. Malenko easily takes him down to start and they trade some hammerlocks. Dean slaps on a front chancery followed by a quickly broken surfboard. Total wrestling clinic from Malenko so far. Back up again and Blitzkrieg tries to jump over Dean and gets dropped face first onto the mat for his efforts.

Dean stomps away in the corner but Blitzkrieg gets up and does an unnecessary backflip out of the corner, followed by a more necessary running dropkick in the same corner. A moonsault sets up a chinlock on Dean but he pops back up and drives a knee into the masked ribs. Well the ribs of the masked man. No one would put a mask on the ribs, though I have seen a claw onto the ribs.

Dean scores with a suplex for some two counts before cranking on the knee like you would expect from a submission specialist. Can you really call him that when he only uses one hold 95% of the time? He stomps away at the leg before hitting a nice gutbuster for two. Blitzkrieg doesn’t sell the leg so Malenko suplexes him over the top and out to the floor as the announcers talk about the Outsiders on Nitro.

Blitzkrieg sends him into the barricade and hits a big twisting dive over the top for a nice looking crash. Back in and the masked man slips, which is about as good as we’re going to get for selling. Malenko plants him with a top rope belly to back superplex, followed by a quick pinfall reversal sequence. A wicked tiger bomb sets up the Cloverleaf to give Malenko the win.

Rating: C. There’s something so fun about a technician like Malenko throwing around a high flier like Blitzkrieg, especially when it seems like Dean is annoyed at a lot of the no selling of the leg. I mean, the guy can’t even limp a bit before he does the dives? Not a bad match here, but it’s nice to see Dean win whenever he’s not losing to people who don’t deserve the push they’re getting.

We run down the card for Halloween Havoc. That show is going to hurt.

Quick look at Disco Inferno winning the Cruiserweight Title again on Monday.

Cruiserweight Title: Disco Inferno vs. Evan Karagias

Disco’s entrance is edited out because he wasn’t Cruiserweight Champion when this was taped. The champ cranks on the arm to start but Evan trips him up and works on the arm as well. A pair of dropkicks send Disco to the floor before he comes back in for another armbar. We could have had Psychosis doing some nice dives or Malenko using 37 varieties of an armbar, but instead we get Disco who uses a total of one kind.

Disco’s backdrop is countered with a simple shove to the mat because this match can’t get past second gear. Evan rains down right hands in the corner but gets sent out to the floor. More whips into various steel objects get two for the champ. Now we get to the interesting stretch of the match as Disco suplexes Evan, then suplexes him again, then can’t hit the third attempt.

A double clothesline puts both guys down before Evan gets up with some right hands and a slam. Evan goes to the apron for a springboard cross body for two more, followed by a powerslam for the same. His attempt at a headscissors is countered though and Disco hits the Last Dance to retain.

Rating: D+. The match isn’t bad from a technical standpoint but my goodness Disco isn’t going to work in this spot. Yeah he can have some acceptable matches, but after watching Malenko earlier tonight, it’s really hard to sit through Inferno defending the title against someone like Evan Karagias.

Just to show how dense WCW is, they show Disco’s entrance after the match, showing that he doesn’t have the belt and completely defeating the purpose of not showing it in the first place.

Bret Hart is proud of his match with Benoit on Monday.

Clip of Brad Armstrong telling Berlyn to speak English in America. This is making me long for the days of Jim Duggan vs. Boris Zhukov.

Brad Armstrong vs. Chris Adams

England is evil now? This would have been a very fun back in say….1987. The fans chant USA as Adams takes him up against the ropes for a cheap shot. They do it again but Armstrong ducks a second cheap shot. Score one for the United States school system. An armdrag sends Adams to the floor before he comes back in to trade wristlocks. Is there a ban on working ANYTHING other than the arm, or did Blitzkrieg’s no selling scare everyone off?

Adams throws him to the floor and stomps away outside. Back in and Adams hits a top rope clothesline, followed by a variety of suplexes. He misses a top rope knee drop but avoids a charge and hits the superkick for two. Brad avoids a charge of his own and hits the Russian (some American hero) legsweep for the pin.

Rating: D. They expect to put Berlyn vs. Brad Armstrong on pay per view and have people pay for it? That’s really the best lower card match they can find? You know who won’t be on the card at Halloween Havoc? Dean Malenko. Dump Berlyn and let Armstrong have a match against Dean if nothing else. No it won’t be the interesting build in the world, but at least the match will be entertaining. Armstrong is still decent in the ring but my goodness they’re not giving him much to work with at the pay per view. Adams is way past his prime here at 44 years old but he still has a decent superkick.

TV Title: Chris Benoit vs. Brian Knobbs

Benoit is defending because Heaven help us if Knobbs ever got a singles title. Brian talks trash on the floor as Jimmy Hart has to tell him to get in the ring. This is like that angle where Bobby Heenan had to give Terry Taylor specific instructions on everything to make him win but without the angle part. He finally gets in and they shove each other a bit before Benoit just fires off right hands, likely at frustration for having to fight someone like Knobbs, and dropkicks him out to the floor.

After about 45 seconds of stalling and not even a single count from the referee, we actually continue the match. Back in and Benoit blocks a charge by raising his boots but runs into a powerslam. Some right hands send Brian back to the floor but he blocks a baseball slide and throws Benoit into the steps. They head into the crowd as referee Nick Patrick argues with Jimmy Hart.

This show seems to be in a ventriloquist convention as the fans sound like they’re going nuts but they appear to just be sitting there. Amazing how Smackdown and Thunder crowds always go that way. They fight up towards the chairs (minus the fans in them) and we take a break. Back with nothing having changed and no reason to believe the referee has even started counting. If you want to have a hardcore match then have a hardcore match. Just say that’s what it is so the fans don’t get confused by the referee’s lack of actions.

They go back to ringside with Benoit being sent into the steps twice in a row. Knobbs chokes a lot and throws a chair at Benoit but the champ wins a slugout and takes it back inside for a nice change of pace. The Swan Dive misses though and Brian covers for two before using his usual lame offense. Knobbs elbows out of a German suplex attempt but Benoit goes into Wolverine mode and hits back to back Germans. Since WE MUST PROTECT BRIAN KNOBBS, Jimmy Hart breaks it up at two and we have a ref bump. Hart accidentally nails his man with the megaphone though, allowing Benoit to hit the Swan Dive to retain.

Rating: D+. Benoit is great, but there’s a firm limit to what he’s capable of doing and we found it with this match. Who in the world can carry Brian Knobbs to a ten minute match without the use of weapons for a crutch? This is another case where there had to be someone else capable of having a better match. Even Hugh Morrus would have been miles ahead of Knobbs here, but Morrus isn’t friends with the right people. Who was going to stick around with this show to see Brian Knobbs get a title shot?

Lash Leroux vs. Silver King

King grabs him to start but gets taken down in an armbar. Some right hands and a clothesline have King in trouble but he sees Lash duck his head and takes him down with a tornado DDT for two. In a bad looking botch, Silver King moonsaults onto Lash’s head for another near fall. Thankfully Lash doesn’t seem to badly messed up but that looked scary.

Lash comes back with a headscissors but his hurricanrana is countered into a good looking superbomb. We hit the chinlock but King throws in some gnawing at the head to keep it interesting. Lash fights to his feet and goes up top, only to dive into a right hand to the ribs. After an unnecessary trip to the floor, Lash escapes a powerbomb attempt and hits Whiplash for the fast pin.

Rating: C-. Not bad here but this was the lower end of the cruiserweight division. Leroux wasn’t bad but he needed to do something besides just be a Cajun. There wasn’t anything to this one other than Silver King’s powerbomb and biting at Lash’s head. Why didn’t Silver King win here again?

Bret still really liked that match on Monday.

Death of Lex Luger video.

Maestro vs. Dale Torborg

Torborg is…..the love child of Sting and Knuckleball Schwartz. Baseball jersey with MVP written on the chest, baseball pants with pinstripes, and red and black facepaint and gloves. There’s no other way to describe him. Maestro armdrags him down a few times before cranking on the arm. That’s not exactly how you want someone who looks like Torborg to have their first match in a new gimmick. Torborg kicks him in the back and drives in some elbows for good measure, only to get caught in a belly to back suplex.

Something like Steve Austin’s flip off elbow gets two for Maestro but a Rock Bottom gives Torborg the quick pin. What an odd match and I’m assuming Maestro is a good guy after the way he was going out there. Just bizarre though as both guys were making their in ring debut (at least in these characters as Torborg had a match on Nitro earlier in the year) and Maestro went from a grand entrance to easily losing a match.

Road report. These aren’t as good without Lee Marshall, and that’s REALLY not saying much.

Rey Mysterio Jr./Kidman vs. Disorderly Conduct

Disorderly Conduct cheat to start (well that certainly is disorderly) and get dropkicked to the floor where the Animals hit stereo dives to take them down. We settle down to Kidman beating up Mike in the ring. Tom comes in and gets the same treatment, meaning Kidman is running out of tricks. He gets a bit more complicated though by headscissorsing Mike and headlocking Tom at the same time.

Rey comes in with a Lionsault for two on Mike before it’s off to Tom who can’t powerbomb Mysterio. Does being Kidman’s partner mean you get to share his powers? Tom finally hits a kind of reverse powerbomb on Mysterio to take over with a lot of stomping keeping him in trouble. An Earthquake style powerslam plants Rey and we take a break. Back with Tom tilt-a-whirl slamming Mysterio for two as the themed jobbers keep up the double teaming. A top rope ax handle to the head gets two for Tom.

Mike distracts the referee so Rey’s small package only gets two so it’s back to the double teaming, including an ax handle to help Mike’s neckbreaker. Off to the chinlockery portion of the match with Tom hooking two of them in a row. That’s quite the feat. Back to Mike for a slam but he misses a top rope elbow. The hot tag brings in Kidman for a BK Bomb to Tom as everything breaks down. Kidman puts Tom up top and launches Rey into the super hurricanrana (that always looks cool) for the pin with Kidman baseball sliding Mike just in case.

Rating: C. Take two power heels and put them against two high flying good guys and you’re almost always guaranteed to have a passable match. This is a formula as old as professional wrestling itself and it will still work to this day. Power vs. speed is one of the most basic matchups you can see and Kidman and Mysterio were as good of a combination as there was at this point.

From Monday, Bret Hart talks about how special that match with Benoit was. You can see how important this really is to him and it’s always good to see Hart a happy man.

US Title: Stevie Ray vs. Sid Vicious

It’s about time Sid defended that thing. Believe it or not, this actually has a story behind it as Sid and Steiner attacked Stevie a few weeks back so Stevie wants revenge. That’s better continuity than WCW has shown in months. Ray jumps him on the apron and clotheslines Sid out to the floor.

A few whips send the champ into the barricade and Stevie slams him down on the floor. I don’t know what’s gotten into Sid recently but this is the second match in a row where he’s actually sold something. Therefore, here’s Rick Steiner to hammer Stevie from behind as referee Charles Robinson stops to tie his shoes. Back in and Sid only gets two off Steiner’s attack so he beats on Stevie to relieve that tension.

Ray comes back with right hands but Steiner trips him up one more time and a legdrop to the back of the head gets two for Sid. We hit the worst chinlock ever (a record Sid breaks twice a week) as Sid LAYS DOWN while barely cranking on Stevie’s neck. Stevie fights up but eats a forearm from Steiner. Somehow he’s able to backdrop his way out of the powerbomb, but the referee stops to tie his shoe for the second time. The Steiner Bulldog and a double powerbomb is enough to make Sid 128-0, after he was 120-0 on Nitro.

Rating: D+. Maybe it’s the wrestling version of Stockholm Syndrome, but these Sid disasters are starting to turn into something resembling tolerable. No they’re not good matches or anything really resembling such, but they’re at least they get in and get out without making things too stupid. They have an idea now, even though it doesn’t seem likely to go anywhere.

Overall Rating: D. This is a tricky show to grade as the wrestling wasn’t the worst in the world, but the lack of star power REALLY hurt things. I can tolerate low name guys if the matches are really good, but that just wasn’t the case here. You need someone to invest in and Brad Armstrong just doesn’t fill that role for fighting a German who is more annoying than bad.

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Monday Nitro – August 16, 1999: Sid Vicious: Popcorn Killer

Monday Nitro #201
Date: August 16, 1999
Location: World Arena, Colorado Springs, Colorado
Attendance: 7,218
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan

Road Wild has come and gone and thank goodness for that. It was three hours of bad wrestling with nothing happening and a bunch of celebrities not making enough of a splash to validate taking the spots from the other guys. We’re heading towards Fall Brawl now and I can’t imagine that show being any worse than Road Wild. Somehow I have a feeling I’ll be surprised though. Let’s get to it.

Tony is immediately praising Hogan for his glorious win Saturday. He also throws in that Sid is now 55-0 since returning. I’m guessing the idea is parodying Goldberg’s streak going so high so fast, because why shouldn’t they mock something they came up with and got over so strong? Sid gets a World Title shot tonight.

Stills of Sid beating Sting at the PPV, leading into this match.

Juventud Guerrera vs. Lash LeRoux

They trade crowd reactions to start and I don’t think most of them know who LeRoux is. Feeling out process to start with Lash dropping down into the splits and nailing Juvy with a clothesline. As thrilling as this is, the announcers mention that we’re getting Rick Steiner vs. Brian Knobbs for the TV Title tonight. There are no words. Anyway Juvy loads up a hurricanrana but gets countered into a powerbomb which is countered into a pinfall reversal sequence. I won’t bother telling you who gets the last near fall as Sid comes in to chokeslam Juvy and powerbomb Lash twice.

Sid wants a double cheeseburger with onions. Or maybe Goldberg. You never can tell with his interviews.

Steve Regal vs. Scotty Riggs

Regal knocks him back with a European uppercut, Riggs knees him into the corner, Sid comes down for the usual power moves for the no contest.

Hogan vs. Nash video.

Mike Enos vs. Cat

Miller guarantees victory in less than four minutes. I see no computer or Terri to say that’s correct so I don’t buy this stat. Instead of running away to prove Cat wrong, Enos goes right after him with a clothesline and a very nice powerslam. Despite being a heel, he asks if the fans want to see him punch Miller in the face, allowing Cat to nail him in the throat. Now I know this might shock you, but Cat fires off a bunch of kicks and Enos comes back with a series of generic power moves, including a clothesline and press slam. Sonny offers a distraction and Miller hits a big kick for the pin at 3:39.

Rating: D. Sid run-in, Sid run-in, Cat match. That’s their big way to make us care after the mess at Road Wild. Also, no Bagwell for his revenge after Miller attacked him after their match on Saturday. I do however like Enos as a power guy who does a simple job but does it well. He isn’t going anywhere of course, but he’s a good choice for a match like this, which went about as high as it was going to.

Berlyn is coming.

We cut to the back where Sid is beating up Silver King and La Parka, including powerbombing La Parka onto a bag of popcorn.

Cruiserweight Title: Lenny vs. Rey Mysterio Jr.

Mysterio is defending for the first time in months. No contact for the first minute and Lenny keeps dancing at Mysterio to play some mind games. He offers Lodi a hug and the champion nails him with a forearm. A reverse powerbomb gets two for Lenny but Rey sends him to the floor and takes Lodi out, only to have Lenny go up for a big corkscrew dive. The fans are actually shocked as that might be the first time Lenny has ever hit a big move. They’re also stunned that Sid comes in AGAIN to lay out all three guys, giving Rey the DQ win.

Sting comes out for the save with Hogan limping behind him. The superheroes clean house and Hogan says Sting can have a title shot next week if he retains the title tonight.

Public Enemy vs. Insane Clown Posse

We’re officially in ECW. We have to be. No other major company could possibly think this is an acceptable idea to air on national television. Raven (in his last television appearance with WCW before walking out when Bischoff offered anyone a release) wants to know where his pyro is. The Clowns jump Public Enemy while they’re stacking tables but are easily knocked to the floor. It’s Shaggy in trouble first with Grunge elbowing him low before a double tag brings in J. and Rocco.

The Violent Clown elbows the Flyboy (I feel like an idiot typing that) before it’s back to Grunge. Raven grabs Johnny’s foot so J. can…..well Tony called it a clothesline but it looked more like Luger’s running forearm smash. Grunge comes back with a double clothesline and the hot tag brings in Rocco to really clean house. A top rope hurricanrana plants Shaggy and it’s table time. Of course Rocco overshoots the table and barely drives Shaggy through it, almost completely missing the bottom table. Not that it matters as the referee gets taken out, allowing Vampiro to Nail Grunge in his Coffin, giving J. the pin.

Rating: D-. Public Enemy isn’t the best team ever. I don’t think it’s a stretch to call them one of the least technically sound mainstream tag teams of all time. The key thing though is they’re actual wrestlers. They’ve been trained and have some experience, but still aren’t all that great. However, they make the Clowns look like the Steiner Brothers circa 1991 because the Clowns aren’t wrestlers. They’re as qualified to be wrestlers as 7 year olds pretending to be police are qualified to patrol the streets. At least the Filthy Animals could carry a match, but this was horrible.

DJ Ran is back. Joy.

Nitro Girls. A bit more actual joy.

Here’s Harlem Heat in street clothes for a chat. They’re back together after Stevie got tired of being with four “fruit booties who couldn’t get the job done.” An open challenge is issues and Booker promises to “turn this mutha out.” I really think this speaks for itself.

Berlyn is here in two weeks.

We get what’s left of the Black and White for the first time in a good while. Horace accepts the challenge for tonight, which actually makes sense for a change. Norton promises to take care of Stevie Ray. Adams says he and Vincent will challenge Harlem Heat tonight….and the team beats him down for no apparent reason, ripping the t-shirt off his back.

Okerlund brings out Kidman for a chat and calls him a chick magnet. Gene Okerlund should not know what a chick is. Kidman says that he, Konnan, Guerrero and Mysterio are a bunch of filthy animals that love to party and chase the chicks (it sounds better coming from him). In a TOTALLY spontaneous line that is in no way designed to set up the next match, Gene asks if Kidman has seen the Nitro Girls pay per view. Of course he has and Kimberly is his favorite Nitro Girl. Cue DDP to start spelling respect before he slaps Kidman in the face and plants him with a spinning Rock Bottom.

Diamond Dallas Page vs. Kidman

A snapmare sends Kidman across the ring and Page slowly stomps away. An elbow drop with some shouts to the fans (the People if you will) gets two for Page but Kidman snaps off a headscissors. That’s the extent of his offense for now though as Page kicks the knee out to kill the crowd again. The helicopter bomb plants him again but Page pulls up at two. Tony forgets the name of the referee Page laid out at Road Wild and just trails off in the middle of his sentence. That might be better for all of us. Page loads up a fireman’s carry for the Diamond Cutter but Kidman spins out into a rollup for the pin.

Rating: D. This was an angle instead of a match but they still managed to be dull in the process. Kidman was treated like a guy way out of his league here, continuing this stupid idea that cruiserweights are nothing compared to the bigger guys. I’m assuming this leads to the Triad vs. the Animals, which wouldn’t be the worst idea in the world. It’s not a good idea mind you but it could be worse.

Page Diamond Cuts both guys to negate the upset. Kimberly has to come out and call Page off.

Here’s the Disco Inferno to declare himself a superstar, a sex symbol and an icon. The Filthy Animals have been calling him every day because he’s the future of this company. Cue Benoit to say prove it.

US Title: Chris Benoit vs. Disco Inferno

Benoit immediately takes him down with a hard chop and the big belly to back suplex. A dropkick puts Disco down again and Benoit is on a roll. The Crossface sends Disco running to the floor and the fans are all fired up for the first time all night. Back in and Disco nails his swinging neckbreaker and clothesline, followed by the middle rope elbow and Russian legsweep.

They head outside with Benoit going into the steps, but Disco stops to dance. You can’t say he isn’t dedicated. He sends the champ into the barricade and gets in a bit more dancing. Back in and Benoit flips out of a belly to back suplex before planting him with a German suplex. Disco’s Last Dance is countered and the Three Amigos knock Disco sillier (but doesn’t mess with a bit of that hair). Benoit Swan Dives him to retain the title.

Rating: C+. As usual, when you give Disco the right opponent, he can pull off a pretty decent match. I was hoping for one of those jumping piledrivers to really make this close, but what else can you ask for from a five minute match on a show featuring celebrity clowns? It’s also nice to see Benoit survive his first title defense as this company wouldn’t shock me if they jobbed him out immediately.

Goldberg vs. Barry Windham

All of the Rednecks but Hennig are out with Barry. Goldberg beats up all of the seconds and pins Barry in thirty seconds with the usual. Well he’s back.

KISS is still coming. They’re seriously going through with it.

Horace/Vincent/Scott Norton vs. Harlem Heat

Non-title. Stevie throws Vincent around to start but botches a press slam, nearly dropping Vincent on his face. It’s off to Norton vs. Booker with Stevie staying in for a double back elbow. That’s it for Flash as he brings in Horace. You know, I remember about three years ago when Hall, Nash and Hogan were taking over the company and wrestling world. Somehow that’s evolved into this trio fighting in a dull tag match and getting beaten up 3-2. Booker drops Horace with kicks but goes after Vincent to give Horace a breather.

That’s enough of the talent though so it’s back to Stevie who kicks Horace in the face. Why overcomplicate the offense? The cheap excuses for the NWO get in some cheap shots from the apron, allowing Horace to take over with a DDT. A big shoulder sends Stevie down and the NWO starts taking turns. Norton loads up the powerbomb but here’s Brian Adams for the save. The referee, not even distracted, doesn’t do anything about the interference as Adams cleans house. In the melee, Booker missile dropkicks Horace to give Stevie the pin.

Rating: D+. So let me get this straight. Booker T. and Stevie Ray, perhaps the most successful WCW tag team of all time, freshly reunited and the new Tag Team Champions, needed help to beat Horace, Vincent and Norton? Also, we’re supposed to care about Brian Adams all of a sudden? At least this should lead to the end of the Black and White. They just need to be put out to pasture at this point anyway. By this point I mean a year and a half ago of course.

The camera follows Adams as he gets into a limo with a KISS license plate. It’s bad enough that they had to do these stupid celebrity appearances but now we have to give them stories?

TV Title: Brian Knobbs vs. Rick Steiner

Again I say let’s get this over with. It’s a brawl to start with Steiner dropping him with an early Steiner Line. They’re quickly to the choking before the brawl heads outside. Rick upgrades his choking with the dog collar before they head back inside for another Steiner Line. So far, if you count punches and kicks, Steiner is at four moves. Brian slams him down but his middle rope splash hits leg. I’ve always thought that would hurt the leg as much as the guy trying the splash. Hart offers a distraction with the collar but Brian is sent into him, setting up the Steiner Bulldog (hey he hit five!) to avenge Wrestlemania VII and retain.

Rating: D-. Of all the people they have in this company, BRIAN KNOBBS got a TV Title shot? You couldn’t throw some low level schmuck out there who might be able to do a single decent looking move? This may be a stretch, but Brian may be a worse illustration of nepotism than David Flair. At least with Flair there might have been some potential there, but everyone knew what they were getting with Knobbs but his friendship with Hogan kept getting him work.

Nitro Girls. Tony asks why Heenan never applauds them. Heenan: “It’s impossible to clap with one hand.” First, no it isn’t. Second…..I need a minute.

Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Saturn

The big bald guy drops Saturn with some early clotheslines but gets kicked outside, setting up a great looking Asai moonsault. Back in and Bigelow just launches Saturn across the ring because Bigelow is old and therefore doesn’t have to sell. He charges into a boot in the corner though and fires off right hands, only to be shoved into the referee. Saturn nails an AJ Styles style springboard forearm and nails a decent t-bone suplex. Cue Kanyon (why couldn’t this be Kanyon vs. Saturn? Too entertaining a prospect?) to shove Saturn into a bearhug, but Shane Douglas comes out to shove Kanyon onto both of them, giving Saturn a pin.

Rating: D+. I know they’ve taken their time getting here but the Revolution finally seems to be taking hold. Benoit winning the title and getting to defend it in a pretty solid match was a good sign and they even won a match over an older guy. I have zero confidence that it’s going to last, but at least it worked for one night.

Benoit and Malenko come out to save Saturn from a beatdown.

WCW World Title: Sid Vicious vs. Hulk Hogan

No word on what Sid’s record is after after all those beatings but he jumps the champ at the bell. Hearing Heenan suck up to Hogan continues to disgust me. If Hogan can be the same character he was in the 80s, why can’t the Brain? Well other than a complete lack of caring that it. Sid very slowly stomps on Hulk and drops a leg, sending Hogan popping back up to his feet. Ever the lunkhead, Sid stands in the corner with his back to Hulk, allowing the champ to hammer away.

Sid bails to the floor and thankfully doesn’t go off to buy a hot dog and a Coke. Back in and he can’t ram Hogan into the buckle but Hulk can do it to him. This riveting spectacle heads outside with Hogan nailing Sid with a chair and throwing him into the audience. For a change of pace, Sid hits Hogan with the chair and throws him onto the announcers’ table. He even one ups the champ by pouring water over Hulk AND the announcers! Tony: “HE SOAKED US WITH WATER!”

Back in and we hit a nerve hold because Sid worked so hard already. The fans chant Goldberg, but the water in Heenan’s ear makes it sound like Hogan. A clothesline breaks up the comeback and Sid fires off some right hands as Tony tries to explain how Hulking Up works. The chokeslam gets a delayed two and I think you know what’s coming. That’s right: Rick Steiner breaking up the comeback because WCW wants us all to watch Raw.

Rating: F. You know, I grew up a Hulkamaniac. In the twenty five years plus as a Hulk Hogan fan, I’ve sat through a lot of nonsense. Over the years, very few things have made me as embarrassed as this nonsense. It comes off like a Hogan impersonator doing all of Hulk’s greatest hits on a carnival circuit, but instead it’s the real thing on national TV. The matches aren’t any good, the live fans respond to a degree, but the TV audience collectively does not care.

Sid doesn’t make things any better either. I know he never was exactly a ring general, but this is setting a new standard for him too. He clearly doesn’t care anymore and is just out there for a check, but some of the stuff he does makes you wonder if he’s trying to make the matches even worse. This was two old guys (even though Sid is in his late 30s here) embarrassing themselves for a check and the company letting themselves die for whatever stupid reasons they come up with this week to validate it.

Trash fills the ring as Hogan is beaten down until Sting makes the save. Hulk covers Steiner for a three count and bell before handing Sting the belt to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. This was the Sid Vicious show and for the life of me I don’t know why. I get that they’re setting up Sid vs. Goldberg for the battle of the streaks, but my goodness do they have to have him mess up that many matches to get to the point? He wouldn’t break up Enos vs. Miller but he can break up Regal getting to hurt Scotty Riggs? Then to cap it off they have him lose the main event via DQ? It’s like they’re parodying the Streak and wrecking the midcard to get there.

While this show was bad, it was a different kind of bad than recently. Lately the shows have been bad because of how horrible things were, but in this case it felt like there were a good many bright spots being dragged down by the bad. The Revolution is starting to take hold and getting rid of the Black and White is a good thing. However, we’re looking towards the old guys dominating the main event for what feels like months to come and KISS next week. As usual, this company could be good if they would get out of their own way, but it just seems to keep getting worse.

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Thunder – June 17, 1999: The Texas Civil War

Thunder
Date: June 17, 1999
Location: Onecenter, Syracuse, New York
Commentators: Larry Zbyezko, Mike Tenay

Oh goodie it’s a taped show from before the pay per view. Thankfully they’ve done a better job of having the commentary actually be up to date with the most recent shows. The problem with that is the most recent shows have been terrible so it doesn’t make things any better. Let’s get to it.

Opening video.

Texas Hangmen vs. Curt Hennig/Bobby Duncum Jr.

They’re masked men who carry bullropes. I’ve never been to Texas but when I go there, I better see about 18 million bullropes and bullrope matches in the street or my heart will be broken. Hennig and we’ll say #1 get things going with a technical sequence. Neither guy gets anywhere with hammerlocks so #1 drops him with a shoulder and chops away. Curt comes back with chops and brings in Bobby so #1 can get double teamed for a bit.

Off to #2 as the Hangmen get some double teaming of their own as Hennig is held back by the referee. Bobby nails #2 with a clothesline and makes the tag off to Hennig as house is cleaned. The necksnap sets up choking with the Hangmen’s bullrope and it’s back to Duncum for a powerslam. Hennig comes back in with a knee lift followed by the HennigPlex to pin #1.

Rating: D+. So was this the Texas civil war? Either way, the Hangmen were the old school masked jobbers who looked intimidating but didn’t do anything in the ring. The good thing is you can take any two guys on the roster and give them the gimmick for the night and save the cost of bringing people in. Knowing WCW, they brought in a dozen guys to see who fit the costumes best and paid them all handsomely.

Post match Duncum hogties #1 until Konnan and Mysterio come out to beat up the cowboys. The unmasked cowboys that is.

Video on Flair and Piper because Roddy is still featured for reasons I don’t understand.

Scotty Riggs vs. Disco Inferno

Before we can get going, Riggs has referee Johnny Boone hold the mirror for a few moments. Disco’s headlock doesn’t get him anywhere so he shoulders Riggs down. Scotty comes back with a dropkick (still nice) and some hip swivels. They feel each other out some more until Disco armdrags him down and stomps away in the corner. The middle rope ax handle connects and Riggs crawls over to check the mirror.

Riggs is goldbricking though and uses the distraction to send Disco into the buckle and take over. He throws Disco outside, only to have Inferno come back in with a sunset flip for two. A clothesline and elbow get two on Disco but it’s mirror time again. Now it’s Disco rolling Riggs up for two but getting punched into a chinlock. Disco fights up and tries the Last Dance, only to get sent into the buckle. They crisscross and try cross bodies at the same time with Riggs landing on top for two. Riggs goes up but dives into a punch to the ribs, setting up the Last Dance for the pin.

Rating: D. Scotty Riggs’ employment continues to astound me. Yeah he has a great dropkick but is that really enough to warrant him having a job for this long? What’s even worse is that he somehow got a job in ECW and a PPV match against Rob Van Dam after this run. Dull match but at least Disco won clean.

Clips from the Master P. press conference.

Clips from Konnan/Mysterio vs. La Parka/Psychosis from Nitro.

Evan Karagias vs. Prince Iaukea

Feeling out process to start until Iaukea looks at the ground. Evan looks down as well and gets nailed in the face because he isn’t that bright. Prince gets clotheslined in the corner but he jumps up in the corner to avoid a charge. It looked good, but it would have been better if Evan actually charged. Instead Evan dropkicks him in the back and slides out to the apron for a springboard clothesline as we take a break.

Back with Iaukea snapmaring Evan down for a kick to the back for two. Evan tries a sunset flip but Prince grabs the referee to stay up. Prince kicks him down and puts on a surfboard for a bit as the fans just do not care here. They head back outside with Karagias being sent into various objects. Back in and Iaukea puts on a chinlock to kill time. Evan fights up and flips out of a belly to back suplex before planting him with a powerslam for two. Prince tries a fireman’s carry but gets rolled up for the pin.

Rating: D. Much like Riggs, I have no idea why Iaukea continues to have a job. How can a wrestling company watch his matches and think that he’s the best option for this spot? The match was long and dull with neither guy doing anything special and just killing time until they got to the finish. At least someone new is getting a win for a change.

This Week In WCW Motorsports.

La Parka/Silver King vs. Brian Knobbs/Hugh Morrus

The luchadores are thrown out to the floor until it’s Silver and Knobbs in the ring. Brian nails a running clothesline in the corner and it’s quickly off to Morrus. Hugh destroys everyone in sight with a forearm to La Parka and a release gorilla press slam to Silver King. He misses a top rope elbow though and the skeleton man comes in off the tag. A missile dropkick puts Hugh down again and King comes back in for some kicks of his own. He nails a middle rope moonsault and goes outside to get a chair, allowing La Parka to dropkick Morrus into the steel.

Back in for some double teaming but La Parka clotheslines the wrong guy, allowing for the hot tag to Knobbs. Brian takes over with some clotheslines and a legdrop but gets kicked in the head to put him right back down. It’s off to King vs. Morrus but Brian sneaks in a chair shot of his own. A gutwrench suplex sets up No Laughing Matter on Silver and we’re done.

Rating: C. I don’t know what’s gotten into La Parka and Silver King lately but I wish it got into more people. The match wasn’t great or anything but it was a minor miracle given who was in there. Knobbs and Morrus aren’t interesting though and I keep rolling my eyes when they get wins as a team.

The main event pyro goes off with well over half an hour to go in the show. Awesome main event?

Booker T. vs. Barbarian

No not quite. This is Booker’s first match in about a month after an injury. Booker grabs a hold but gets nailed by a shoulder. To mix things up a bit, Booker grabs a hold but gets nailed by a back elbow. With holds not really working, Booker nails the flying forearm to put Barbarian outside. Back in and we grab an armbar because Booker is overly confident in his submission skills. Barbarian kicks him down (I’m as shocked as you are) but eats a superkick, sending him outside next to Jimmy.

Back in and Booker hammers away, only to walk into an overhead belly to belly. They head outside together and Booker takes a chair shot as we go to a break. We come back with Barbarian using his standard heel offense (kick, strike, choke, distract the referee so Hart can choke, etc), capped off by an atomic drop. It’s chinlock time but Booker elbows up, only to get choked right back down.

Back to the chinlock for a bit until Booker elbows up again (he needs to get over this repetitive stuff) and starts his finishing sequence. The forearm and side slam set up the sidekick but Jimmy grabs Booker’s foot. The Kick of Fear sends Booker outside but Barbarian takes too much time, allowing Booker to hook a rollup out of the corner for the pin.

Rating: C-. Nothing to see here for the most part as it was just a way to make Booker look good. Barbarian continues to be a guy that you can depend on for a decent match like this and he had that same match for the better part of ever. There has to be something to someone who can stay employed without changing anything in that many years.

Stills of Savage vs. Nash. Haven’t I suffered enough from that match yet?

We see Nash accepting Sid’s challenge on Nitro.

Bash at the Beach ad.

And now, here’s the ENTIRE eight man tag from Nitro to close things out. Here it is, just so this isn’t the shortest Thunder review ever.

Ric Flair/Roddy Piper/Kanyon/Diamond Dallas Page vs. Saturn/Chris Benoit/Dean Malenko/Buff Bagwell

That’s quite the tag match. The old guys run away to start until we get down to Flair vs. Benoit. We get the required chop off until Benoit backdrops him into the heel corner. Off to Page who has to be saved from a Crossface attempt. Piper comes in and gets his wish to face Bagwell, only to get punched out to the floor a few seconds later. An atomic drop to Piper sends us to a break.

Back with Benoit escaping a belly to back suplex and rolling up Flair for two. We get the pinfall reversal sequence with Benoit coming out on the bad end of it. Flair tries the Figure Four but gets rolled up again, only to have Benoit nail him with an enziguri and put him in the Figure Four instead. Everyone comes in and the good guys put on Figure Fours in a cool spot (Malenko screwed up at first). Bigelow makes the save with a legdrop though and it’s off to Kanyon to work on Chris. A middle rope Fameasser drops Benoit and Kanyon brings in Page as the heels have him in trouble.

Flair comes back in for chops before it’s back to Kanyon, who sends Benoit into the discus lariat from Page. Piper gets the tag for his lame punches before it’s back to Page for a stomping. We get the required missed tag to Saturn, allowing the Jersey boys to suplex Benoit down. Page goes up for the middle rope jump that is clearly designed to jump into a raised boot and nothing else, allowing for the hot tag to Bagwell. Everything breaks down until it’s only Malenko and Flair left in the ring. Ric knocks him out to the floor but turns around and takes the Blockbuster for the surprise pin.

Rating: C+. Not bad here with the young guys FINALLY getting a big win. However, this brings up the important question: how can Flair possibly come back from this devastating loss to a fluke move from a former champion that has been rising up the card for years? I mean, clearly such a loss completely cripples Flair’s career and ends any potential he’s ever going to have right?

Overall Rating: D-. I know the eight man wasn’t bad, but the fact that it was the second time I’ve seen the match inside of a week is ridiculous. It’s very rare that a match is important or good enough to air it again on the next TV show and the eight man isn’t at that level. Other than that there’s nothing worth seeing here and the show was far more dull than anything else. Not being able to fill nearly half an hour of a show is pitiful though.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Wrestler of the Day – November 3: Lash Leroux

Today is the Ragin Cajun Lash Leroux.

Leroux got started in late 1998 after graduating from the Power Plant and we’ll start on Nitro, February 1, 1999.

Cruiserweight Title: Lash LeRoux vs. Kidman

For some reason Heenan isn’t here so Larry stays on commentary. Lash has been jobbing on Saturday Night a bit but this is his big show debut. A quick headscissors puts LeRoux down but he comes back with one of his own to put Kidman on the floor. Lash follows up with a hurricanrana off the apron before diving off the steps to drive the champion into the barricade. Kidman nails a charge of his own and they head into the crowd.

That only lasts a few seconds before it’s back into the ring with Kidman hitting a crossbody for two. A kind of powerbomb puts Kidman down but he comes back with right hands to the head. Lash does the splits to avoid Kidman before pulling him down into a chinlock. Kidman comes back with a slam but misses a top rope splash.

Off to a double arm crank followed by a belly to belly for two. They trade near falls until Leroux hits something resembling a Michinoku Driver for two more. Kidman comes back with a bulldog out of the corner but Lash slams him to the mat. He takes too long posing though and misses a legdrop, allowing Kidman to hit the Shooting Star to retain.

Rating: C. This was a nice back and forth match, even though LeRoux never was anything special in the ring. He would be around for the remainder of WCW’s time but I always liked him for some reason. Kidman was his usual good self, but we need to get to the showdown with Mysterio already.

Another early match on Thunder, February 18, 1999.

Chavo Guerrero Jr. vs. Lash Leroux

They start fast with Chavo running Lash down with a shoulder but gets caught in an armbar. We cut to the back to see a limousine arriving but Rey Mysterio is waiting to greet it. Lex and Liz are in the limo and as they get out, Rey slams the door on Luger’s hand and shouts THUG LIFE. Not quite as good as Barry Windham and Dustin Rhodes and it makes Mysterio look like a criminal. I’m assuming Luger is injured and has to be taken out of the tag match at SuperBrawl.

Back to the arena with Chavo hitting a baseball slide to send Leroux into the barricade. Chavo nails a belly to back suplex in the ring and we hit the chinlock followed by an armbar. Leroux fights up and drops into the splits before nailing a clothesline. A northern lights suplex gets two on Guerrero but he crotches Lash on the top. Leroux gets tied up on the top rope and choked by Chavo’s boot, earning a DQ.

Rating: D+. This would have been better had we gotten to see the whole match, but at least we get to see Kanyon and Raven’s Excellent Adventure again. Leroux isn’t much to see in the ring but a Cajun guy is at least something we haven’t seen before. Chavo getting to be more aggressive as a serious heel is something nice to see as well.

We’ll jump ahead a bit to Halloween Havoc 1999 with a title shot.

Cruiserweight Title: Disco Inferno vs. Lash Leroux

Disco is champion coming in. The massive demon holding the massive pumpkin is always cool to see for the set. It’s shaking here (intentionally) which makes it look even better. Disco takes over to start and Lash isn’t really able to fight back. The ring is really big looking by comparison to the modern WWE one. Out to the floor and Lash goes into the post. He finally gets something going with a combination belly to belly/powerslam for two.

Lash grabs a sleeper and this match is really nothing special. Disco sends him over the top but Lash hangs on. Disco gets the first shot in anyway but the Last Dance (Stunner) misses. A neckbreaker, a middle rope axe handle and a piledriver all get two for the champion. Lash grabs a blue thunder driver (his move according to Tony) for two. They botch…something involving a clothesline and the Last Dance keeps the title on Disco.

Rating: D. It’s passable but this probably belonged on Nitro more than anything else. They weren’t clicking at all and it was really hurting things. Lash wasn’t anything special but he got a lot better once they put him into the MIA. Disco was always around and had a much better career than he’s remembered for. Pretty sloppy match though.

Lash and Disco formed a short lived tag team and opened Starrcade 1999.

Disco Inferno/Lash Leroux vs. Mamalukes

Leroux is a pretty generic cruiserweight from Louisiana. The Mamalukes are two Italian guys named Johnny the Bull and Big Vito who are your basic mafia gimmick. Vito and Lash start after a quick brawl. The Cajun guy is pounded into the corner as Vito does every Mafia stereotype you can think of. Lash takes a side kick to the face and it’s off to Johnny for some double stomping. Leroux takes him down with a hiptoss and it’s to Disco. Inferno gets two on the Bull via a clothesline and two off a clothesline and Russian legsweep.

As Disco stomps away in the corner, we get the story behind this: apparently Disco owes the Italians’ manager Tony Marinara (just go with it) $25,000 and the makeshift team is together because they used to not like each other but now respect one another. Disco has also tarred and feathered Marinara before pouring meat sauce on Vito and the Bull. I’ve heard stupider angles. I can’t think of many but I’ve heard of them.

The Mamalukes take over and it’s off to Vito who hits a neckbreaker to give Johnny a two count. After a quick chinlock by the Bull and some double teaming including a wishbone split for Disco’s legs, a double powerbomb gets no cover on Inferno. Instead Vito misses a middle rope splash and it’s off to Lash.

Leroux speeds things up and takes Vito down with a spin kick before making the heels hit each other by mistake. Everything breaks down and the Italians hit a double clothesline to take over. Disco and Vito go to the floor as Johnny misses a guillotine legdrop, allowing Disco to hit a splash for two. Everyone is back in again and Disco tries his Chartbuster (Stunner) but Vito breaks it up, sending Disco into Lash for a Chartbuster to his partner for no apparent reason. That and a spinning inverted DDT to Disco are enough for the pin by Vito.

Rating: C-. Very basic tag match here but I’ve seen worse. Again though, the idea of this story being based around a guy named Tony Marinara does it no favors and makes for a rather stupid story all around. Disco continues to be impressive though as he was nothing but a comedy character who lasted for many years with the company. He also wasn’t half bad in the ring, but his career was hindered by the character.

Another title shot at SuperBrawl 2000.

Cruiserweight Title: TAFKAPI vs. Lash Leroux

It’s Prince Iaukea doing a Prince (singer) gimmick. The title is vacant and this is a tournament final due to Oklahoma (a parody of Jim Ross) winning it and weighing about 300lbs. The audio is rather bad here as it keeps cutting in and out. Artist’s chick Paisley does a stupid intro but gets a nice little slap on the moneymaker by Lash. Prince goes insane and the ring is LOUD tonight.

Artist takes over to start and pounds away with right hands. Lash fights back but tries a discus punch, allowing Prince to kick him in the face. Sweet counter there. The fans are trying to care but it’s not really happening. Lash hits a nice dive to take Prince down again but walks into a SICK dragon screw to give Artist the advantage again. Tree of Woe is used and Lash buries his face in the Snickers logo.

Lash tries a sunset flip and Artist grabs the crotch of the referee to avoid going down. This is getting way too close to a Goldust character here. Out to the floor and Lash goes into the steps. Apparently it’s cool for Paisley to chill on the apron. They go a bit more back and forth and it’s the living definition of mediocre stuff. Paisley keeps Lash from taking him off the top and the jumping DDT off the middle rope gives Artist the title.

Rating: D. Well let’s see. The match wasn’t anything remotely decent, the ending was typical/predictable and the fans didn’t care at all. What other grade did you expect me to give this? Artist was a worthless guy because his in ring stuff was just boring so let’s push him to ANOTHER singles title. They never got that he just wasn’t very good but tried with him anyway, which I guess is the Eric Young approach.

Back to the ranks on Thunder, April 12, 2000.

Chris Candido/Juventud Guerrera/The Artist vs. Lash LeRoux/Crowbar/Shannon Moore

These are the six men in the Cruiserweight Title match on Sunday. The Artist is somewhat more famous as Prince Iaukea. Artist gets beaten down to start before getting things going with Shannon. Things almost break down until we get Lash vs. Candido. Someone throws in a beach ball and here’s David Flair to dance with Artist’s chick Paisley (Booker T’s real life wife Sharmell). Juvy pounds on Shannon as the match continues to be all over the place.

Moore hits a Fameasser to put Guerrera down and it’s off to Crowbar. A quick northern lights suplex gets two for Crowbar but a headscissors sends him out to the floor. Crowbar and Flair get in a fight on the floor but Candido dives on both of them to take them out. Artist and Candido start fighting on the floor so Lash dives on everyone. Juvy sends Moore to the apron before diving onto everyone not named Shannon.

Moore hits a BIG Asai Moonsault onto all five guys as everyone is down. Shane Helms, Moore’s partner, interferes but here’s Daffney, Crowbar’s chick, to take Shane down with a hurricanrana. Back inside and Juvy hits the Juvy Driver (scoop piledriver) on Crowbar but Candido and Artist hit a double DDT on Crowbar for two. Candido adds a top rope headbutt for one on Crowbar before Artist hits his jumping middle rope DDT on Candido (his own partner) to let Crowbar hit a front suplex for the pin on Chris.

Rating: C+. Well it wasn’t boring. It wasn’t really a tag match and I completely lost track of who was on what team more than once, but it wasn’t boring. To be fair though that’s the entire idea here and the point of the match was to set up the big match on Sunday where it’s going to be every man for himself. A pair of triple threats would have been the better idea here but it was all over the place and not boring, so at least there’s that.

Lash was in a six way for the Cruiserweight Title at Spring Stampede 2000.

Cruiserweight Title: Artist vs. Chris Candido vs. Juventud Guerrera vs. Shannon Moore vs. Lash Leroux vs. Crowbar

No Evan Karagis for 3 Count here. I think they would split soon after this. The two 3 Count guys do their thing before the match. It’s a Suicide Sixway. The other guys run out and the big fight is on. Shane is on the outside and not in the match. Candido vs. Moore at the moment and I don’t think tags are required. Ok so yes they are. Crowbar escapes a DDT and gets a northern lights suplex for two.

One fall to a finish here. If DQ rules have been relaxed why not allow everyone to run in all the time? Lash vs. Juvy now as this is going to be one of those insane matches. Juvy Driver gets two as Artist saves. Daffney accidently hits a Frankenscreamer on her man crowbar and then screams her way out of trouble. We bust out the dives by everyone and everybody is down.

David Flair comes in and beats up Helms and Candido is crotched by Artist. Candido misses a swan dive and Artist hits an Angle Slam (called a Samoan Drop) and Tammy debuts with a chair to give Candido the title. I can’t complain about her in a see through nightgown and a nice thong shot.

Rating: C. This was your usual insane Cruiserweight spot fest but I could have gone for it being longer than 5 minutes. The non-high flying power brawler as champion is the usual bit for them and that’s fine. The title hadn’t meant anything in years so throwing this together is fine. Nothing great but it did its job I guess and we have a new champion now and he’s New Blood.

Lash would join up with the Misfits in Action, a military themed group of people who didn’t have anything else to do. Here they are in a huge mess on Nitro, July 24, 2000.

Filthy Animals vs. Misfits in Action vs. Perfect Event vs. Natural Born Thrillers

The teams are Rey Mysterio/Juventud Guerrera, Hugh Morrus/Lash Leroux (Captain Rection and Corporal Cajun, which I won’t be calling them), Shawn Stasiak/Chuck Palumbo and Sean O’Haire/Mark Jindrak respectfully. This is in the Caged Heat cage, which is WCW’s name for Hell in a Cell. It’s escape only and the last team in the cage is out of the four way title match at New Blood Rising. Palumbo immediately goes for the door but gets caught and beaten down just as fast. Konnan is on commentary here.

This is more like a battle royal than a cage match to start, as everyone is beating on everyone at once. O’Haire hits the first big spot of the match, firing off the Seanton (Swanton) Bomb on Morrus. There are no covers in this as it’s escape only remember. The fighting continues as we see Rey and Juvi hiding in the corner of the cage. That’s pretty smart when you think about it.

Palumbo hits a jumping back elbow on Morrus and in the chaos, the Thrillers both walk out and advance to the PPV. Rey goes up for a cross body onto Stasiak but Stasiak catches him in mid air. That’s more power than he usually shows. Juvy dropkicks Rey onto Stasiak, sending Shawn to the floor, where he and Palumbo make their escape. We’re down to the Filthy Animals vs. the Misfits.

Morrus loads up the No Laughing Matter moonsault but Juvy makes the save. The Bronco Buster keeps Morrus down….and then things stop making sense as the Perfect Event lock the cage. No explanation is given for this but I guess it makes sense in Russo’s mind. Mark Madden pulls out some bolt cutters for Konnan who doesn’t use them immediately. The match basically stops as Disco Inferno of the Animals goes up top and opens a door on top of the cage.

Back in the ring the Animals set up a ladder because this match isn’t overbooked enough yet. They beat down the Misfits so they can climb the ladder and dive on them again. You know, because going through the opening in the roof would make too much sense. Everyone is down after the dive and for a second we actually get a breather. Morrus is up first and climbs the ladder to escape, only to be stomped on by Disco who is still on top of the cage.

Rey climbs up and it’s Juvi vs. Lash, the latter of which has done next to nothing in this match. Konnan finally cuts the lock off the door as Morrus fights off Rey and Disco (Rey is a heel here, if that gives you any idea how stupid this company was) as the other two walk out the door. So now there’s no one in the cage but the match continues. Tony: “We’re completely lost.”

There’s a table set up on the floor and Morrus teases diving off the top through Juvi through said table, but Rey stops him from killing himself. Juvy gets up and stands the table against the cage before sending Lash through it. Morrus and Rey go back through the roof and down into the ring again because….well why not? It doesn’t last long though as Morrus counters a rana into a powerbomb to escape and…..win I guess?

Rating: W. As in WHAT? Where in the world do I begin? First of all, why would you have a big match like this to qualify for another match? Second, why would you have a match like this to eliminate someone? Third, why didn’t the match end when everyone was out of the cage? Fourth, if they could go through the door only, WHY WOULD THEY GO ON THE FREAKING ROOF?

Fifth, why would this match be on Nitro instead of on the PPV? Sixth, why did it take Konnan so long to open the door? Seventh, why did Madden have bolt cutters? Eighth, why were the first two teams in this in the first place? Ninth, who thought Rey as a heel was a good idea? Finally, WHAT DID I JUST WATCH???

Another mess at New Blood Rising.

Tag Titles: Misfits and Action vs. Mark Jindrak/Sean O’Haire vs. Perfect Event vs. Kronik

The Filthy Animals are all referees here so we have four referees and 8 wrestlers, plus Konnan on commentary. Rey and Juvy have the tag title belts here. Perfect Event is Stasiak and Palumbo. Kronik are the actual champions coming into this. Something tells me this is going to be horrible. MIA is Hugh Morrus and Corporal Cajun (Lash Leroux). Disco grabs a mic and says he’s the in ring referee and the other guys and Tygress are enforces. If they touch Disco or any of the others they’ll be suspended I guess.

The referees were added like 30 minutes ago so it’s not like this was advertised. I think I know why. One fall to a finish here. Adams and Palumbo start us off. Konnan at least is funny. Stasiak goes to the floor and the “referees” beat him up. Leroux vs. Jimdrak at the moment as Konnan makes incest jokes. The wrestling is ok but at the same time there are FAR too many people in there at once. The fans chant ECW for some reason.

O’Haire kicks the hell out of Clark’s head and it looks great. He was talented for sure. The referees do Bronco Busters on Morrus. End this NOW. This match is such a joke that it’s painful to watch. What’s annoying is that if you made this a regular tag match it could have been pretty decent. Disco counts slowly for Cajun. He does the same for Stasiak. It’s weird to think that three of these guys worked for WrestleZone for awhile.

Everybody, including the referees beat up on Morrus. Stasiak hits a NICE jumping back elbow. This is just a total mess again as we get a Tommy Young reference. Sean hits a PERFECT Swanton. Palumbo is set in High Time but Muta and Vampiro run out to give us FOURTEEN PEOPLE in this thing.

Apparently everyone else got bored as it’s just Kronik and Palumbo in the ring. Disco won’t count the three off a pumphandle slam. Chavo Guerrero runs down and steals the referee’s shirt and counts the pin as the sixteenth person involved in this match (8 wrestlers, 5 filthy animals, Chavo, Vampiro, Muta). Konnan is ticked that they have to fight Kronik the next night.

Rating: F. A tournament has 16 people, not a single match. I don’t think anything else needs to be said here. Also, why did Chavo count the pin for Kronik when members of his own stable are in this match?

Time for a six man tag at Fall Brawl 2000.

3 Count vs. Misfits in Action

The Misfits here are Sgt. AWOL (The Wall who most of you likely don’t remember) Lieutenant Loco (Chavo) and Corporal Cajun (Lash Leroux). The band has a new song here that likely could have been a decent hit if sung by a “legit” band, which is either great or scary. The idea of the Misfits was that they were guys that were thrown out of storylines by Russo so they banded together as their only way to have a chance. That works well enough.

And yes, 3 Count gets a match against someone not named the Jung Dragons. Two of the boy band members are Shannon Moore and Shane (Gregory) Helms. The third sucks. We hear about Duggan giving the flag and board to General Rection (Hugh Morrus) and will be in his corner tonight. Yeah I’m sure this isn’t going to go badly at all for Rection.

This is a pretty basic match but it’s not bad. They’re just kind of filling in time as these matches aren’t going to mean anything past tonight anyway. The idea here is that the band is scared to death of AWOL so they’re going to try to keep him out. Simple story but it works. Leroux was a lot better than he was given credit for. I might even stretch to say he was pretty good.

He hits a springboard X Factor to get the hot tag to AWOL who cleans house. Moore hits a nice flip to put Cajun down and we let the high spots loose. AWOL gets knocked through a table (his signature thing) but not before holding Moore up off the ground purely by his hair. Everything goes insane and Leroux hits Helms with what we would more or less call Cradle Shock for the pin. They get a standing ovation for it and that’s what they deserved.

Rating: B. I REALLY liked this. There was no interference, there was nothing completely insane, the effort was there and the wrestling was there. What a shock that when you put all this together, you get a good match. Worst thing is I can more or less guarantee this is the high point of the show.

Here’s a thrown together match at Halloween Havoc 2000.

Perfect Event vs. Misfits in Action

Shawn Stasiak/Chuck Palumbo vs. Lieutenant Loco (Chavo)/Corporal Cajun (Lash Leroux) for those of you unfamiliar. This was signed seconds ago. Well of course it was. Stasiak has been a problem in the group apparently so expect that to cause the loss for them. Chavo and Stasiak start us off here as this is just a basic tag team match.

Chavo plays Ricky Morton as I could not be less interested in this match while still writing about it. We get the second release date for Backstage Assault in the last ten minutes. One thing says Halloween and one thing says not until December. The game sucked anyway so it’s not like it really mattered. According to Tony there used to be a limit to the amount of saves a partner could make in a match. I’ve heard of that before actually so it’s not as insane as it sounds.

NICE overhead belly to belly by Palumbo to Chavo as it’s all Perfect Event. Hot tag to Cajun who was underrated I think. A bad sleeper from Palumbo has Cajun in trouble for bad acting. The referee is Scott Armstrong, as in the blonde guy that used to be in WWE with the hitch in his count.

If you’re going to use the sleeper, at least do something other than having an arm in front of the throat Palumbo. Soon afterwards everything goes nuts and like I said before heel miscommunication leads to Palumbo kicking Stasiak and a tornado DDT from Chavo ends it.

Rating: D+. This was just there. It’s about ten minutes long and nothing at all of note happens in it. Two teams had a wrestling match on a show for the company they work for. That’s all that happened here. It was just ok and this was once again one of the issues with WCW: matches on PPV had no point at all, much like this one.

Lash would be sent to Heartland Wrestling Association in developmental. Here he is an an HWA show as part of a WCW invasion in November 2001.

Lash Leroux vs. Tony D.

Tony is the Ice Cream Man and gives some out to fans before the match. Leroux takes him down to the mat and makes noises to the crowd. A backdrop puts Lash down but he comes right back with a missile dropkick for two. Leroux works on the back and grabs a cravate but D. suplexes his way out. A German suplex gets two on Lash and Whiplash is countered into a powerslam for two more. D. yells at the referee for some reason and gets rolled up with Lash’s feet on the ropes for the pin.

Rating: D. A WCW invasion of developmental is an interesting idea and something I would have liked to see more of. Leroux as a heel didn’t do much for me though and didn’t make sense given how natural of a face he was. The Ice Cream Man was nothing interesting and I can’t imagine him getting anywhere.

We’ll wrap it up with Lash making a one off TNA appearance at their first PPV.


NWA World Title: Gauntlet for the Gold

Royal Rumble with 90 second clocks and then a singles match at the end. Jarrett is first and second is Buff Bagwell. Bagwell hits the Blockbuster and then is thrown out. Before the 90 seconds are up they have the next guy come in to avoid the clock just ticking away. I like that. Lash Leroux of all people is second. Just end this now. He’s out in about 45 seconds and Norman Smiley is 4th of 20.

There goes Norman after about a minute. This is just pointless. Apollo, a Puerto Rican wrestler with a great look is 5th. K-Krush is 6th and he saves Jarrett. Actually he doesn’t but the announcers say he does. This is just mindless stuff as nothing of note is happening and it’s just random stuff to fill in time, which is how you could describe the whole show to be fair. Oh hey let’s make fun of Toby Keith even more.

Tenay is TICKED that the heels are working together for no apparent reason. Slash, with James Mitchell who has a stable that we haven’t heard from until now, is 7th. He’s one half of PG-13 who was a big deal in Memphis and nowhere else. Jarrett saves him for no apparent reason. Must be a Tennessee thing. Del Rios who is another big guy is next. He’s a former USWA (Memphis) champion. He’s a Scott Steiner lookalike and they even point that out.

He’s better known as Phantasio, which is a guy that Monkey is a mark for. He was a wrestling magician of all things which somehow evolved into Papa Shango but was given to the guy that played him instead. Oh come on he’s even got the Superman S on his ass. Some guy from NWA Wildside, a former WCW farm territory, is 9th. The clock is off the screen now and the times are getting longer. Konnan is 10th.

Every guy has their resume read with as many WCW, WWF and ECW references as we can get in there. He beats up everyone and is over as hell. We really need some eliminations. Joel Gertner who has lost about 100lbs brings out Bruce from a team called the Rainbow Express. Yes it’s a gay tag team and Billy and Chuck are a big deal at the moment. No coincidence there at all.

He’s Kwee Wee from WCW if you’re wondering. He’s the guy that wins the battle royal next week. MAYBE 15 seconds later, Rick Steiner comes out. Slash is out. There goes Justice who looks like a combination of Rhyno and one of the Pitbulls and now Rick goes after Jarrett. Malice (The Wall from WCW) is 13th. He chokeslams everyone in sight. Ok with Konnan it’s more like a chokeshove.

Truth makes up for it though by going WAY into the air. There goes Bruce, Truth, Del Rios, Konnan and Steiner are gone, leaving us with Malice, Apollo and Jarrett. Scott Hall is 14th to a huge pop and they actually give him a resume too, like he needs it. He’s the Outlaw now for no apparent reason. Hall hits a Razor’s Edge on Jarrett and here’s Toby Keith to suplex Jarrett and throw him out.

Oh how I hate singers trying to be wrestlers and failing so badly at getting people to care. Hall actually throws Jarrett out to make it count for the ridiculous NWA. Chris Harris is 15th and no one cares as no one knows who he is. Vampire Warrior (Gangrel) runs out early and beats up Harris. Ferrara will not shut up about Jarrett and I’m sick of him in ways I didn’t think were humanly possible.

Devon Storm, more commonly known as Crowbar from WCW, is next. The second biggest star in this match is Gangrel. That says the whole thing. Steve Cornio is 18th as I can’t believe this made it 5 weeks. Ken Shamrock is the penultimate entrant and he suplexes a lot of people. Brian Christopher, who should give his father 20% of every dollar he ever makes in wrestling because he never would have made a dime otherwise. A ton of people go out in succession and all by Christopher. Yes, they had him be a force.

The final five are Shamrock who is almost unrecognizable, Christopher (out before I finish his name), Malice, Apollo and Hall. Malice puts out everyone not named Shamrock, so it’s Ken Shamrock vs. the Wall for the world title. You read that right. This is just garbage as he survives the ankle lock for about 40 seconds before walking around just fine. A belly to belly ends a five minute nightmare.

Rating: F+. This was just a trainwreck. We had Brian Christopher, Gangrel, Lash Leroux and Norman Smiley in the main event. Let that sink in for a bit. Also, Shamrock beats the Wall for the title. Why not Hall, who people at least know? This was just a mess, much like the whole show. I have no idea what the point here was but it was bad. This was ¼ of the show, and that’s just unacceptable. The booking was off the wall as SHAMROCK, who hadn’t been seen in about two years and looked awful, gets the belt.

Leroux is a guy that had a decent look and a nice backstory but there wasn’t enough there to get ahead. The thick accent hurt him a lot and while he was in shape, he really wasn’t anything all that special. He was just kind of there and WCW had a few dozen guys that fit that billing. It caught up with him eventually but he certainly wasn’t bad.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Thunder – May 20, 1999: The Conqueror of the Cruisers

Thunder
Date: May 20, 1999
Location: Kansas Coliseum, Wichita, Kansas
Commentators: Larry Zbyszko, Mike Tenay

After a week off for the NBA Playoffs, we’re back for a show taped before the latest Nitro, meaning we’re not likely to get any storyline developments here. The main story is the start of Savage vs. Nash for the title and the ongoing drama around who is in charge. One question to tie the stories together: if Bischoff didn’t have the power to overturn the ending of Piper vs. Flair, why did he have the power to restart Page vs. Nash? Let’s get to it.

We open with Gene bringing out Buff Bagwell for a chat. After some sucking up to the Kansas crowd, Buff says Scott turning on him wasn’t a surprise but Rick was. There’s no loyalty in the NWO, though I’m not sure there’s even an NWO anymore. Buff randomly challenges Randy Savage for a fight later on so that’s likely the main event.

Clips from the main events at Slamboree.

Clips of the Steiners teaming up again at Slamboree.

Clips of Booker T. calling out Scott and getting beaten down off camera from Nitro.

TV Title: Rick Steiner vs. Scott Putski

Rick is defending in case you weren’t paying attention and comes out in a Red and Black shirt. He hammers on Putski to start and drops an elbow before already putting on a chinlock. Seriously. Steiner drops some forearms to the head as Tenay incorrectly says Steiner won the TV Title at Starrcade 1989.

More pummeling ensues as Rick puts him upside down stomach first into the top turnbuckle for two. Choking and some face rubs into the mat set up elbow drops for two, which just seems to tick Steiner off. Putski’s comeback goes as badly as you would expect and he gets dropped by a knee. The Steiner Bulldog and a weird looking arm lock retain the title.

Rating: D-. Of all the things WCW did badly over this year, putting Rick Steiner in this spot for so long might be the worst. He wasn’t over, he hadn’t meant anything without his brother in about nine years, and his matches looked to be bordering on dangerous rather than just stuff. Look at the roster that could use the TV Title and see how stupid it is to keep it on Rick Steiner this long.

Flair and the Horsemen convince Barry Horowitz to lay down for David Flair tonight.

Juventud Guerrera vs. Kidman

The fans are behind Kidman here even though Guerrera slaps hands on the way to the ring. We immediately get the focus off the match as Tenay tells us that Hogan will be back on Monday. Must be time to panic about the ratings. They lock up to start and Juvy heads to the corner to dance a bit. Juvy gets shoved down again and walks into a dropkick as they’re taking their time to start. Kidman’s German suplex is escaped with a backflip and Juvy kicks him in the face to block a backdrop.

We finally start getting some high flying in with Juvy going up but getting crotched, sending him down to the floor. Kidman nails him with a plancha and we take a break. Back with Kidman slamming him down and putting on a chinlock for a bit before Juvy nails a bulldog and talks a lot of trash. Some right hands in the corner stagger Kidman but he powerbombs Juvy down to escape. Not that it matters as Kidman misses something like a Stinger Splash and falls out to the floor. The announcers’ response? To talk more about Hart vs. Nash on the Tonight Show.

Back in and Kidman counters a powerbomb in the sequence that won’t die but can’t follow up. Juvy heads up top and dives onto Kidman’s raised boots. They trade suplex counters until Juvy headscissors Kidman out to the floor for another plancha. Back in and Kidman dropkicks him out of the air for two two.

Juvy knocks him off the top but gets crotched and superplexed for his efforts as this is finally hitting a higher gear. In a nice bit of poetic justice, Kidman’s powerbomb is countered into a sunset flip for two and a missile dropkick gets the same. The BK Bomb gets the same before Juvy loads up the Juvy Driver, only to get rolled up for a quick pin.

Rating: C-. The problem here is that we’ve seen these guys blow the roof off the place so many times that there’s almost no way they can top it. It wasn’t a bad match but it’s been done so many times that it’s hard to care. Still though, not bad and I have a feeling it’s going to be the best thing on the show.

Cruiserweight Title: Rey Mysteiro Jr. vs. Kaz Hayashi

Mysterio is defending of course. Kaz takes him into the corner to start and slaps him in the face to tick the champion off a bit. A hard elbow to the head puts Rey down and Kaz slaps him a little more. Hayashi rakes the eyes and hooks a bulldog but misses a charge into the corner. The champ takes him down with a headscissors, only to get dropped throat first onto the top rope.

With Mysterio down, we get an OH YEAH as Savage and the girls come out for some reason. He welcomes us to the house of madness and says Mysterio is a fine wrestler. Buff may be the stuff but Rey is the man, despite being caught in a reverse chinlock at the moment. Savage keeps praising Mysterio and brings up Rey beating Kevin Nash before offering Rey a spot on Team Madness.

As he says this, Rey’s hurricanrana attempt is countered into a powerbomb. Savage: “HE’S FANTASTIC!” Miss Madness 1999 (called Mona here) says Mysterio is their man and we take a break. Back with Mysterio getting a pin off a top rope hurricanrana. It’s the only move we saw after the break.

Rating: D+. I was tempted to not rate this as a big chunk of the match was spent looking at Savage and the girls. Apparently just taking over Nitro and boring me to death there wasn’t enough for Savage as he’s now taking over title matches. Hayashi was dominating Rey for the most part here as the champ only hit a few moves of his own. What we saw wasn’t bad but there wasn’t much to see.

Post match Savage offers Rey the spot on the team again and says all four members have already voted yes. Mysterio says he’s honored but has other plans for himself. Savage: “OUCH!” He offers again and gets the same response so Savage nails him in the back of the head. Rey actually fights back with a springboard missile dropkick but the girls get in a few shots, setitng up a piledriver from Savage. Kidman comes out for a save and has the same luck. Now Konnan tries Savage but gets hit low, allowing Savage to slam him down and drop the big elbow.

This Week In WCW Motorsports.

We see clips of the almost show saving Tag Team Title match from Monday.

Tag Team Titles: Raven/Saturn vs. Horace/Vince

Raven and Horace brawl before the bell but Saturn breaks it up with a superkick. Saturn cranks on Vince’s arm as we get the opening bell, followed by an easy suplex for two. Raven comes in for the mock Total Elimination and a front suplex into a swan dive from Saturn. Off to Horace as Kanyon has replaced Raven on the apron. I guess we’ve got a Freebird Rule now. Anyway Horace misses a charge and gets forearmed in the jaw. Kanyon comes in for a swinging neckbreaker and it’s already back to Saturn. Well they’re faster than the Freebirds at least.

A double sidekick puts Horace down again but Vince earns his pay with a shot from the apron. Saturn gets beaten for a few moments as Raven switches back with Kanyon. Horace gets in a few shots such as a clothesline and elbow drop followed by a backrake. And yet he still puts in more effort than his uncle. Vince comes back in with a top rope ax handle and a wide variety of fists before it’s back to Horace for another clothesline.

Saturn is sent outside for some cheap shots as this just keeps going. Back in and Horace puts on a sleeper but Saturn reverses into one of his own. Horace breaks it up and the double tag brings in Raven and Vince. There’s the drop toehold onto the chair followed by some heel miscommunication, setting up the Death Valley Driver to pin Vincent.

Rating: D. You know, I can live with bad matches and stupid segments, but these matches that are just borderline ok and go on for what seems like ever are almost impossible to take. We know it’s going to be a squash with the champs barely breaking a sweat, so why in the world do I have to sit through eight minutes of Horace and Vince boring everyone to tears? At least get someone out there who could have a decent match.

Clips of the Hart vs. Nash Tonight Show stuff. Owen’s accident derailed whatever plans they had for this.

We see part of Parker vs. Flair from Monday.

David Flair vs. Barry Horowitz

After a handshake, Barry pats himself on the back and we’re ready to go. He takes David down and we’ve got Horsemen. Some very basic offense has David reeling but the Horsemen get on the apron to remind Barry of the deal. Horowitz chokes in the corner but misses a knee drop, allowing David to hook the Figure Four for the win. So wait, did Barry miss on purpose or did David just avoid a move and capitalize for the win? The same thing happened in the Parker match: he was supposed to be throwing the match but didn’t show any signs of doing so. Again, WCW can’t even keep its own stories straight.

Another side note: Charles Robinson was fine here but the announcers talked about Savage injuring him on Nitro. Since this was taped in advance, Robinson was in perfect health, making WCW look confused again.

Clips of Savage challenging Nash from Nitro.

Main event fireworks.

Curt Hennig vs. Disco Inferno

Hennig takes him into the corner to start and runs him over with a shoulder followed by a dropkick. Back to the corner for some chops from Curt but Disco hiptosses him down. Curt hammers away again and here come Savage and the girls because it’s been thirty minutes since we saw them. Disco goes after him for no apparent reason and the match is thrown out.

The girls help take Disco down and peel back the mats so Savage can rub his face in the concrete. Buff comes out for the save and it’s main event time.

Buff Bagwell vs. Randy Savage

Bagwell hammers away to start and actually does pretty well, nailing ten right hands in the corner, an elbow to the jaw and a dropkick for two. He kicks Savage in the face and puts on a chinlock but gets sent to the floor to stop him cold. Back in and Bagwell gets two more off a small package but gets nailed by an ax handle. They trade elbows until Madusa slaps Buff from the apron (referee? What referee?), which is enough of a distraction for Savage to send him outside. Savage chokes on the barricade and with a chair, finally drawing a DQ.

Rating: D. For DEAR GOODNESS ENOUGH RANDY SAVAGE! The match was just there for Savage to beat up someone else on his path of boring to the World Title match at Great American Bash. Buff was trying but his push was crippled by the loss to Steiner at the pay per view. There’s just nothing there now.

Savage nails Buff in the neck with a chair until security comes out to end the show.

Rating: F. In the span of two hours, Randy Savage beat up the greatest cruiserweight of all time, one of the biggest starts in Mexican wrestling history, a multiple time Cruiserweight Champion, a former TV Champion and a former multiple time Tag Team Champion. So we’re setting up Nash vs. Savage, which they have to know is going to be a disaster, by having Savage destroy half of the roster? I agree it makes him look strong, but you can’t space it out a little bit?

The best match on this show was an underwhelming Kidman vs. Guerrera match and that’s nowhere near enough to bring this up. This was one of the worst yet and that covers a lot of ground. WCW is floundering right now and I really don’t see anything being able to turn it around, at least not for a few months.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Thunder – April 22, 1999: Let Them Be Awesome

Thunder
Date: April 22, 1999
Location: Orlando Arena, Orlando, Florida
Attendance: 9,429
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Larry Zbyszko

Welcome to the bottom of the cliff for WCW. On Nitro earlier this week we saw DDP turn heel for no apparent reason, Nash turn face after being one forever but then save Goldberg for no apparent reason and then Flair committed to a mental hospital for reasons of WCW being stupid. Hopefully a taped Thunder picks things up a bit. Let’s get to it.

The announcers run down the card, which actually doesn’t sound too bad. A six man between Benoit/Malenko/Kidman vs. Mysterio/Raven/Saturn sounds very appealing.

Hardcore Hak vs. Hugh Morrus

Morrus takes the kendo stick away and nails Hak to start as Larry is already ripping on the hardcore stuff. Now it’s trashcan lid time followed by a mop to Hak’s head. Hak comes back with a trashcan shot as Chastity starts handing in even more weapons. They head outside where Morrus reverses a whip into the barricade and nails Hak with another stick. Back in and Hak sends him face first into a chair because he doesn’t know how to do many regular wrestling moves. He draps Morrus over the top rope and drops a leg over his back before bringing in a table.

That’s not enough so he brings in a ladder but Morrus grabs a powerslam. No Laughing Matter connects for no cover. Hart comes in to set up two tables but Chastity sprays him with a fire extinguisher. The guys actually in the match climb the ladder with Morrus being shoved through the tables. Hak’s White Russian legsweep through the pieces of the table is enough for the pin.

Rating: N/A. That’s going to be my standard grade for this stuff going forward for the simple reason of this isn’t wrestling. Hak got over because of his entrance in ECW and that’s about the extent of his usefulness. This was a disaster and I believe Morrus was injured and out for a few weeks as a result of this. It doesn’t even have the stupid charm that ECW has half the time.

Video on Nash vs. Page.

We look at the Black and White attacking Konnan on Nitro.

Konnan vs. Scotty Riggs

Konnan hammers away at Riggs, sending him looking for his mirror. The bulldog and low dropkick have Riggs in even more trouble and Konnan fires off more punches in the corner. Back in and Scotty fires off punches of his own followed by an actually awesome dropkick. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Riggs elbows Konnan down to stop his comeback bid. After a Rick Rude hip swivel, Riggs suplexes him down but misses a top rope ax handle. Konnan kicks him in the ribs, hits the X Factor and hooks the Tequila Sunrise for the win.

Rating: D. Riggs’ continued employment astounds me but I’m assuming that dropkick has something to do with it. Konnan was his usual self here, even though he’s fallen through the floor ever since getting thrown out of the NWO. He’s just there anymore and doesn’t do anything but get on my nerves with his odd language.

Video on Flair vs. Piper.

Video on the awesome fourway from Monday.

Vampiro vs. Al Greene

They trade armbars to start until Vampiro grabs a full nelson. That goes nowhere either so Greene shoves him off and nails a shoulder. Greene takes him down but Vampiro rides him on the mat to send Al out to the floor. Vampiro hits a plancha and takes him back inside for some chops. This is already going nowhere. A suplex puts Vampiro down but he comes back up with a superkick and a high cross body. Instead of covering off that, Vampiro grabs a rollup for the pin.

Rating: D+. The high spots helped a bit but this was only a step or two above the previous match. Vampiro really doesn’t hold up but at least he’s somewhat better as a face. On the other hand, it’s hard to hate someone named Big Al. Seriously, try it sometime. Anyway this was about what you would expect from this kind of match.

Hotline shill.

TV Title: Booker T. vs. Bobby Duncum Jr.

Booker is defending. Tenay offers condolences to Rick Rude’s family as Rick passed away two days earlier. They trade some headlocks and Booker gets taken into the corner for some kicks to the ribs. Booker fights back with some kicks and a clothesline to send Bobby out to the floor. Duncum pulls him to the floor though and ties Booker’s feet with his bullrope. Because he’s a cowboy you see, because WCW loves cowboys.

We take a break and come back with Bobby holding a chinlock. A big boot and belly to belly get two on Booker and we’re in the chinlock all over again. They head outside with Bobby having a pair of chairs taken away from him. Serves the cheater right. Back in and a top rope clothesline gets two for Duncum and we’re back to the chinlock. A clothesline puts Booker down for two more and it’s time for the bullrope again. Booker ducks a big swing and hits the ax kick and missile dropkick to retain.

Rating: C-. Duncum had a good look but being a cowboy is only going to take him so far. It gets dull watching a guy just carrying a rope and wearing a hat as the entirety of his gimmick. Booker is still doing well but he’s back in the same rut he’s been in for years with just having random matches that don’t lead anywhere.

Video on Bagwell calling out Steiner.

Buff Bagwell vs. Fit Finlay

After starting a USA chant, Buff takes him down with a quick armdrag to send Finlay out to the floor. Back in and Finlay nails him in the face with a European uppercut and slams Buff face first onto the apron. He tries to bring in a chair ala Duncum and has it taken away just like Bobby. Back in and Finlay pulls on Buff’s nose (seriously) but Buff fights up with a jawbreaker. They trade slams and Buff nails a headbutt but walks into a knee to the ribs. Another European uppercut staggers Buff and the rolling fireman’s carry gets two. Buff stops a charging Finlay in the corner with a boot and nails the Blockbuster for the pin.

Rating: D+. They’re firmly in the “here’s wrestling” mode tonight with no real emotion or energy to anything. Buff’s face run continues to work well enough, but he’s only a little bit ahead of Scotty Riggs as far as in ring abilities. Finlay was his usual good self but he didn’t have much to work with here.

This Week in WCW Motorsports.

We look at Flair being committed on Monday.

Disco Inferno vs. Rick Steiner

After a commercial for some reason, Rick quickly kicks Disco out to the floor before choking him down in the corner. More punching and choking ensues as this is all Steiner so far. Some kicks send Disco running out to the floor out of fear for this boring match. Back in and Disco nails the swinging neckbreaker and a middle rope elbow. He goes up again but dives into a belly to belly suplex. A regular suplex sets up the Steiner Bulldog followed by a kind of STF to make Disco tap.

Rating: D-. Total squash here and the rise of Rick Steiner begins. This is another one of those things in 1999 that really makes me shake my head as Rick would get worse and worse in the ring and get higher and higher on the card as a result. Disco got in almost nothing here and might as well have been from In The Corner To My Left.

We look at Page embracing the dark side to end Nitro.

Goldberg vs. Ernest Miller

Miller offers him the five count but kicks Goldberg at two. Some kicks have Goldberg staggered but he just punches Miller in the face. Sonny Onoo tries to interfere but Goldberg gorilla presses him at Miller and immediately spears both of them down in a cool looking spot. Jackhammer ends this quick.

Kidman/Chris Benoit/Dean Malenko vs. Rey Mysterio Jr./Raven/Saturn

Main event time and Kidman doesn’t look thrilled with his partners. The three teams are scheduled for a triangle match at Slamboree which sounds awesome. Robinson is guest referee of course. Mysterio and Malenko get things going with Rey hammering away in the corner. An armdrag takes Malenko down and we get a standoff. Off to Raven vs. Kidman with the bird enthusiast driving shoulders in the corner.

Raven crotches him on the top rope and Saturn nails a missile dropkick to put Kidman on the floor. A plancha nails Kidman on the floor as Mysterio protests. The argument allows Kidman to tag in Malenko for a dropkick to Saturn’s knee. Dean chokes away and Kidman is hesitant to come in under such circumstances. Saturn’s powerbomb attempt is countered but Raven breaks up a Shooting Star attempt.

That’s fine with Saturn as he belly to belly superplexes the crotched Kidman across the ring. Off to Raven for an atomic drop but Kidman sends him into the corner and tags out to Dean. Raven and Saturn take over on Malenko just as easily before tagging in Mysterio for a dropkick. Malenko suplexes Rey down and we take a break.

Back with everyone in the same spot due to the wonders of taped shows. Saturn has a red headdress for no apparent reason. Benoit goes after Rey’s knee, drawing in Saturn for an attempted save. That’s exactly what the Horsemen want as they switch behind the referee’s back to keep control. Dean gets two off a suplex and brings in Kidman who tries to help Rey up.

Benoit will have none of this compassion stuff and tags himself so he can throw Kidman to the floor. A superplex drops Rey again as the Horsemen keep control. Dean throws Mysterio outside and everything breaks down. That goes nowhere as Malenko takes Rey back inside and bends Mysterio’s back over his knee.

Rey finally takes Malenko down with the sitout bulldog and makes the tag to Saturn. Everything breaks down again with Rey tagging himself back in after a few seconds. Kidman clotheslines Malenko “by mistake” but Anderson crotches Rey on the top. The spinebuster plants Rey and Kidman protests, but Dean dropkicks Kidman onto Mysterio for a fast count pin.

Rating: B-. Take six guys and give them about fifteen minutes to be awesome. It wasn’t a classic but it blew away everything else on this show. This likely sets up some tension between the Tag Team Champions as we head into Slamboree. That match is going to rock given the talent in the ring. Good main event here.

Overall Rating: D+. The main event brings this up a good bit as everything else was basic, boring stuff that didn’t need to exist. At the end of the day though, I’ll take dull, generic wrestling over stuff that insults my intelligence, making this show a bit more tolerable than the worst of Nitro. It’s also a step up over some of the worst Thunders they’ve had over the last few months.

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Thunder – April 15, 1999: DDP Is A WHAT?

Thunder
Date: April 15, 1999
Location: Orlando Arena, Orlando, Florida
Attendance: 9,429
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Larry Zbyszko

WCW is on a nice mini roll but they’ve long since lost me on believing this is going to last. The main story coming out of Nitro is Page vs. Nash being set up for Slamboree due to Flair making the match as well as Nash wanting to get back at Page for injuring Hogan. We don’t have much else on the horizon for the show yet but maybe we’ll get something tonight. Let’s get to it.

The announcers welcome us to the show and tell us about Mysterio vs. Guerrera for the Cruiserweight Title tonight. Works for me.

Vampiro vs. Buff Bagwell

The fans are into Buff so he does the Karate Kid pose and dances a bit to start. An armdrag puts Vampiro down and it’s time to dance some more. Buff blocks a right hand in the corner and nails Vampiro in the jaw. Vampiro comes back with a kick, headbutt and chop followed by even more strikes to Buff’s chest. Buff nails a quick dropkick and some punches in the corner, only to get hot shotted onto the top rope.

A middle rope spinwheel kick sets up a cross armbreaker on Buff. That goes nowhere so Vampiro goes back to the kicks to the chest to maintain control. Even more kicks, including one that looked rather low, sets upa chinlock on Bagwell. The fans really don’t seem all that interested in this kick-a-thon.

Buff’s quick comeback is stopped by a kick (of course) and Vampiro hooks an ankle lock. Bagwell fights up again but gets dropped by even more kicks. Vampiro finally tries something else with a suplex but Buff counters into a slingshot suplex. Maybe Vampiro should stick with the kicks. Buff goes to the middle rope but dives into a Rock Bottom. Vampiro tries a top rope hurricanrana, only to get shoved down, setting up the Blockbuster for the pin.

Rating: D. Egads this match was dull. Vampiro continues to be nothing in the ring and puts me closer to a coma every time I have to see him. When you remind me of Ernest Miller before he got funny, something is very wrong. Nothing to see here and not a good choice to open the show.

Jerry Flynn vs. Wrath

Wrath easily throws him around to start before nailing a middle rope shoulder. Flynn is whipped out to the floor as we appear to be in total squash mode. A hard whip sends Jerry into the barricade but he sends Wrath into the barricade to come back. Back in and Wrath scores with a clothesline before choking a lot as something seems wrong. They head back outside for some brawling and Flynn is sent into the barricade for a double countout. I’m not going to rate this as Wrath shredded his knee somewhere in there and the finish had to be rushed. He would be out for nearly a year.

Horace vs. Meng

It’s a brawl to start (of course) with Meng pounding away but Horace takes him into the corner. Meng pounds his own head into the corner because he’s not all there and Horace looks scared. A superkick puts Horace down and Meng chokes a lot. They head outside with Horace being whipped into the steel but he gets up a boot to stop a charging monster. Horace channels his inner Sting though and splashes the barricade by mistake.

Back in and Horace pounds away to almost no effect as Meng comes back with a powerslam. Meng busts out a dropkick of all things and they slug it out again until Horace hits a spinebuster that the announcers claim was an atomic drop. Horace clotheslines him out to the floor and nails an actually decent suicide dive. They head back in with Meng countering a slam into a small package of all things. Horace nails some clotheslines and a Hogan legdrop for two. Then, like the nitwit he is, he tries a sunset flip and gets Death Gripped for the submission.

Rating: D. They surprised me with some of the stuff they did in there but the match was six minutes of Meng vs. Horace. There was no way this was going to be interesting no matter what they did. That suicide dive wasn’t bad though and it at least gave me a break from the barrage of punches and clotheslines.

Flair, Anderson and Robinson are in the back with Charles pouring champagne. A woman brings in some papers for Flair to sign, which he does without reading them. Arn points out how stupid this is but Flair tells him to calm down.

Disco Inferno vs. Mikey Whipwreck

They trade headlocks to start until Mikey takes him down with a pair of armdrags into an armbar. Back up and we get armdrags number three and four with Mikey still in control. Disco comes back with a shoulder and clothesline followed by a middle rope elbow for two. These guys certainly aren’t cranking up the variety tonight. Whipwreck is sent outside as we go to a break.

Back with Disco being sent into the barricade and Mikey legsweeping him into it again. They head back inside with Mikey snapping Disco across the top, dropping a springboard legdrop and forearming him in the face for two each. He misses a top rope splash though, setting up Disco’s piledriver for another near fall thanks to Mikey’s foot touching the rope. Back up and a swinging neckbreaker sets up a chinlock on Whipwreck.

Mikey fights up but gets elbowed right back down. Disco misses another middle rope elbow and gets dropkicked a few times, only to come right back with a clothesline. A Fameasser puts Disco down but Mikey takes too much time going up. Disco pulls him down for a reverse DDT, only to spin Mikey around into the Last Dance for the pin.

Rating: C-. Why was Mikey Whipwreck hired? Was it really just to screw with ECW? He hasn’t done anything special in his few months with the company and I don’t think he’s won a match yet. This wasn’t terrible, but when Disco is the one carrying your match, you can tell there’s something wrong.

Gene brings out the Black and White for a chat. Stevie says they’re the police of the WCW and wants a World Title shot tonight against “that no good beatnik fruit booty.” And so it begins.

This Week In WCW Motorsports.

Disorderly Conduct vs. Saturn/Raven

Saturn wants to accessorize his dress with a Tag Team Title. Raven and Mike get things going with Mike quickly running into a boot. Off to Saturn for a side kick before the stars start tagging quickly. A kick to the ribs sets up a knee lift from Raven who then allows the tag off to Tom. Raven takes Tom down for a top rope knee drop from Saturn for two.

Mike gets in a cheap shot from the apron and Disorderly Conduct starts making their own tags. Saturn is laid across the ropes for an ax handle from Tom. He fights back but runs into Mike’s knee and a jawbreaker gets two. Mike grabs Saturn’s arms but Tom hits his partner by mistake, allowing Saturn to suplex Tom and tag Raven. The drop toehold spot to Tom causes everything to break down and the Evenflow ends Tom.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t the worst squash in the world and at least Disorderly Conduct got to control for awhile. I miss having teams like them who are there for no reason other than to job but people might buy them as a threat because they have a team name. It’s better than Slater Gator if nothing else.

We look at Mysterio getting beaten down on Monday.

Cruiserweight Title: Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Juventud Guerrera

Rey is defending. They pose to start with Juvy shaking his hips on the middle rope. Juvy runs him over with a shoulder and stops to pose even more. They try a quick pinfall reversal sequence but Guerrera stops to try a powerbomb instead of a backslide. Rey sends Juvy out to the floor but he comes right back in with a tilt-a-whirl slam. A hurricanrana takes Juvy out to the floor and we take a break.

Back with Juvy missing a splash in the corner and getting faceplanted on the mat. There’s the Bronco Buster from Rey but he takes too much time to pose. Juvy tries to take him down into a powerbomb but gets countered into a sunset flip. Back up and Rey catches him in a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker but Juvy pops up with a dropkick.

Mysterio’s throat gets snapped over the top rope and Juvy busts out a People’s Elbow for two. Rey sends him into the corner but Juvy backflips over him and grabs the Juvy Driver. He’s too spent to cover though so the trip up top for the 450 takes too long. Mysterio crotches him down and runs the corner for a top rope hurricanrana to retain.

Rating: C+. The match was a total spotfest but the spots worked well enough. Juvy as a Rock impersonator was a bizarre choice but it would get even worse later on. Mysterio continues to be the top guy in the division and it’s hard to argue with him being the champion for as long as he was.

Robinson keeps sucking up to Flair, calling his match on Monday as good as his series with Steamboat. Anderson comes in and complains about not being able to find the woman from earlier. Robinson is sent off to find her.

WCW World Title: Diamond Dallas Page vs. Stevie Ray

Stevie yells at Kimberly to start and gets punched in the jaw by the champion. A hard forearm puts Ray on the floor and Page dives onto both Stevie and Vincent. They brawl in the aisle and then into the crowd before coming out by the set. Vincent gets punched as well before the guys actually in the match head back inside.

Stevie gets in a shot to the throat followed by a clothesline for two. We hit the bearhug for a bit before Page grabs a swinging neckbreaker to get a breather. The discus lariat puts Ray down but a Vincent distraction lets Stevie take over again. The Slapjack is countered and Page spins around Ray’s shoulders for the Diamond Cutter to retain.

Rating: D. Nothing to see here but what else were you expecting? It’s Stevie Ray getting a World Title match on the B show where they’re not really trying in the first place. I have no problem with them handing Page midcarders to build up his credibility a bit more and the Black and White isn’t going to get hurt by losing a match.

Vincent, Horace and Adams come in and get beaten up as well to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This wasn’t the worst show in the world but it’s more meaningless TV. I’m not sure what the Flair/Anderson/Robinson stuff accomplished but it’s the only thing resembling storyline advancement that we got all night. The wrestling was passable enough and that’s about all that matters on Thunder. Worthless but not a terrible show.

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Wrestler of the Day – September 5: Disco Inferno

Get your dancing shoes on because today is the Disco Inferno.

After a few years in the indies, Disco would head over to WCW. Here’s one of his first matches from Nitro on October 30, 1995.

Sabu vs. Disco Inferno

Here’s a strange pairing. Next week it’s viewer’s choice somehow. There will be two groups of wrestlers and you pick the matches. That’s kind of cool I guess. Heenan is back now and talks about the Braves being the world champions. We also hear about the Olympics coming soon. I think this is Disco’s TV debut. All Sabu to start with random off the top stuff. When he didn’t have the tables and ladders etc he was very watchable and enjoyable at times.

Disco comes back with really basic stuff as he was even more of a joke at this point than he was later on. The fans chant for Sabu as I think this was an ECW town, so that makes sense. Disco’s offense lasts like a minute as Sabu is like boy please and the somersault legdrop ends it. Sabu puts him through a table afterwards. Well he tries to since the table doesn’t break.

Rating: C+. Not bad at all as Sabu was still something totally freaky at the time and no one was like him. Rey wouldn’t debut for like 9 months so Sabu was very cool and new still. This went nowhere but it was a fun little squash. It’s interesting to think where Sabu could have gone in WCW had they not thrown him out.

Disco wouldn’t do much to start but would get a Cruiserweight Title shot at Bash at the Beach 1996.

Cruiserweight Title: Disco Inferno vs. Dean Malenko

I hate to say it, but that song is very catchy. He says everyone is here to see him dance and once he wins the title he’ll dance. The guy had charisma and energy. You can’t take that away from him. And let’s talk about the main event more. Ok to be fair, this was a huge match for a change rather than the usual run of the mill main events so I can’t complain that much.

They talk about how awesome the cruiserweights are even though a lot of the really great ones aren’t there yet. This is all Malenko so far. Malenko’s in ring work is really underrated as far as the flying stuff goes. He actually was ranked as the best in the world in the PWI 500 in 97. I was surprised by that. Maybe six minutes in, Disco hits his first offense which is a punch. And now he just goes off in the longest string of offense he’s ever been on I think.

It lasts all of a minute. Heenan says pincovers. I thought only Taz used that term. Most odd. Disco hits his Stunner which was his finisher but checks his hair first. Dean starts busting out springboards of all things. He really could do just about all of it. Dean just goes off and hooks the Cloverleaf for the tap out. Malenko just going off like that made it work for me.

Rating: C+. This wasn’t bad, but the ending was never really in doubt. Inferno looked pretty decent if nothing else, but it’s not like it meant much as Rey would beat Dean the next night in the opener to win the title. Disco would get better but he was nowhere near there yet. Decent little filler match though.

Back to Nitro on December 30, 1996.

Disco Inferno vs. Glacier

There’s a big black spot all over the ring from the stuff that Jacques threw at Stevie in the previous match. After the bell, Disco says drop out of the match or face the wrath of his new leg lock. Glacier flips him over and we’re ready to go. Disco gets kicked a lot so he hides behind the referee and comes back with a clothesline. He sets for his new leg hold but can’t remember how to do it. Instead he hits a pretty good neckbreaker but Glacier pops up and hits a superkick to end it.

Rating: D+. Ice > Fire I guess. The match was, again, pointless and nothing interesting. Glacier would stay undefeated until roughly July while Disco would stay a joke for years to come. At the end of the day though, he took a stupid gimmick and kept a job out of it for how many years? That proves something, although it might be that WCW is stupid enough to keep him around.

Disco would miss a lot of time due to an injury so we’ll come back on Nitro, September 22, 1997 with Disco getting a title shot.

TV Title: Alex Wright vs. Disco Inferno

Wright is defending. Disco shoves him into the corner and gets slapped which fires him up. The fans don’t like Wright at all which is a good sign for him. Wright gets sent to the floor and walks in front of Raven before going back inside to crank on Disco’s arm. We take a break and come back with the champion hitting a spinwheel kick before stomping on Disco in the corner.

You would think the champion would follow up there but instead it’s time to dance. A belly to back suplex puts Wright down but he comes back with a back elbow for two. Wright hits a top rope stomp for no cover because it’s time to dance even more. Disco dodges a charge in the corner and pounds away before crotching Wright on the top rope. A swinging neckbreaker gets two for Disco but he misses a middle rope elbow. They both miss a few moves before both trying cross bodies at the same time. They collide in the air and Disco falls on top for the pin and the title in a shocker.

Rating: D+. The match itself wasn’t much but to say this was a surprise is an understatement. On the other hand though, I have almost no idea what the point is in having Disco win the title when Wright has been on fire lately and has the crowd HATING him. Disco on the other hand was just a comedy guy who hadn’t done anything in his entire WCW run until this point.

Disco would quickly drop the title to Saturn but get another chance on Nitro, December 8, 1997.

TV Title: Saturn vs. Disco Inferno

The announcers say we have to take a break because they’re scared for their lives. Back with Saturn throwing Disco around as Tony spends the first few minutes talking about how they need to not ignore the match. Saturn is knocked to the floor and Disco sends him into the steps, only to have Saturn drop him onto the top rope back inside. The champ cranks on Disco’s arms before hitting a high angle suplex for no cover.

A top rope elbow misses and we head back to the floor again with Saturn sending him into the barricade. Disco Stuns Lodi over the barricade before pounding away on Saturn in the corner. Saturn hits a neckbreaker to take over again, followed by a big suplex for two. Disco counters a powerbomb out of nowhere and Stuns Saturn for the pin and the title.

Rating: C. I have no idea what the point of this was. We spend two months making fun of Disco for losing to Jackie and then give him a clean pin over a killer like Saturn? That’s supposed to make us forget about everything he’s done for the last few months? The match wasn’t bad but the booking makes you wonder what WCW was thinking at this point. I guess the idea was that Raven wasn’t there to guide him, but……Disco Inferno?

After losing the title, Disco would go back to his midcard self including this match on Nitro, March 30, 1998.

Disco Inferno vs. Billy Kidman

Disco throws him into the air and gets two off a clothesline to start. He stomps a mudhole in Kidman in the corner and throws him out tot he floor. Kidman comes back in with a slingshot headscissors and the announcers finally stop talking about how awesome Randy Savage is and wondering who Nash’s partner will be.

A slingshot legdrop gets two for Kidman and Disco gets a near fall of his own off a sunset flip. Kidman dropkicks him down and hits a quick backbreaker, only to miss a top rope splash. Disco gets two off an elbow drop and a neckbreaker but charges into a sitout spinebuster for two. Kidman makes the mistake of lowering his head though and Disco hits a great piledriver for the pin.

Rating: C+. Much better match than I was expecting here with Disco actually going move for move with Kidman. I don’t remember him using the piledriver that often but it’s a good finishing move for him, especially if the Chartbuster is being taken by Disciple. Really nice match here with both guys looking good.

Disco would get back on PPV at Bash at the Beach 1998.


Konnan vs. Disco Inferno

This is an added bonus match. It’s a Wrestlezone special I guess. Disco is billed from Funkytown of all places. Alex Wright is with Disco here and tries to speak some Spanish. Thankfully Mike and Tony are here to tell us they can’t speak Spanish. Where would we be without them to explain jokes to us? Nash and Luger are with Konnan. Gee I wonder what’s going to happen. Nash talks for awhile to eat up more time.

Disco gets beaten down quickly which shouldn’t surprise anyone. We hear about Disco’s legit good resume in wrestling which is often forgotten. Disco gets in some jobber offense as it’s pretty clear what we’ve got on our hands here. Wright gets in some shots while Luger/Nash aren’t thrilled with it. There’s a Rack for Wright and a powerbomb for Disco. Tequila Sunrise ends this squash.

Things would get a bit better when Disco hooked up with Alex Wright to form the Dancing Fools. Here’s a match from Road Wild 1998.

Disco Inferno/Alex Wright vs. Public Enemy

Tokyo Magnum is here with the dancers. Wright rolls away from Rocco to start before hiptossing him down and dancing. They fight over a wristlock until Alex dropkicks him down and tags in Disco. He’s not quite ready to fight yet though and drops to the floor for a three way high five with the other dancers. Back in and Disco takes Grunge down with a clothesline before bringing Wright back in for a missile dropkick. Alex stops for some dancing and turns around into a Rocco clothesline.

A double flapjack puts Inferno down and Tokyo throws in a trashcan out of nowhere. Grunge gets cracked over the back as the referee is cool with all of this. Rocco brings in a ladder and that’s too much for the dancers who go for a walk. Tokyo doesn’t want to leave but his partners come back with a table. Disco grabs a mic and says let’s make this a street fight. Tony states the obvious: “Haven’t we already made it one already?”

The referee is fine with that so Public Enemy goes to the back to find a toilet seat and a kitchen sink. Grunge pounds on Disco on the floor as Tony hypes up a cookie sheet. Wright suplexes Rocco through a trashcan but Grunge blasts Alex with the sheet for the save. Rocco loads up the flip dive through the table but Disco makes a save to prevent Wright’s demise. The kitchen sink is brought in and nearly broken over Grunge’s back. The fans want to see the table but they get Tokyo Magnum thrown inside instead.

Public Enemy throws the dancers into each other and give them stereo atomic drops, only to have Wright come back with a leg lariat to Grunge. Tokyo hits Magnum by mistake as Grunge blasts Disco in the face with the ladder. Alex walks away as Rocco see-saws a ladder into Disco’s hair. Now Tokyo walks away, leaving Public Enemy to set up three tables on top of each other next to the platform. Grunge climbs a ladder to put Disco on the top table, allowing Rocco to climb the scaffolding for a huge elbow drop. Grunge has to throw Disco back inside, avoid a top rope splash from a returning Magnum, and get the pin.

Rating: D+. The match was fun and the spot at the end was good (though also odd looking with a delay before each table broke) but it took over fifteen minutes to get there. The wrestling stuff at the beginning was a waste of time and they should have just gone to the street fight stuff from the beginning. Not horrid though.

Disco would get on a roll late in the year and had a #1 contenders match for a shot at the Cruiserweight Title at Halloween Havoc 1998.

Disco Inferno vs. Juventud Guerrera

Winner gets a Cruiserweight Title shot against Kidman later tonight. Disco stomps away in the corner to start but grabs a side slam for two. Juvy lands a LOUD chop to take over and does some quick dancing of his own. Guerrero tries the backflip out of a Fameasser position but just falls to the side. A second attempt at a Fameasser works a bit better and Disco gets monkey flipped over the top. Juyy baseball slides into a headscissors and both guys go down for a few seconds.

Back in and Disco takes over with an atomic drop and clothesline before stopping to dance instead of cover. We hit the chinlock with no cranking on it at all before Juvy slides to the apron to take Disco down with a Stunner. Disco heads outside again and turns his back on Guerrera, allowing him to be taken out by a nice plancha. They head inside again and Disco grabs a swinging neckbreaker but lays on the mat instead of covering.

Disco counters a sunset flip with a right hand but stops for a Macarena. He busts out a giant swing of all things but dizzies himself. It doesn’t turn out all that badly though as he falls head first onto Juvy’s groin. Referee: “Juvy are you ok?” All three announcers: “NO HE’S NOT OK!” Disco takes forever to get up top so Juvy can nip up and grab a top rope hurricanrana. Now it’s Juvy on top with a spinwheel kick (his hip hit Disco so Tony’s “flying body attack” description is more accurate) for two and the sitout bulldog gets the same. Juvy loads up a victory roll but Disco shoves him off and nails the jumping piledriver for the pin.

Rating: B-. Shockingly good match here with Disco wrestling a normal style against the high flier in Guerrera. I’ll give Disco this: he turned a ridiculous gimmick into a successful career and had some solid matches throughout. That jumping piledriver looked great as well and made things even better.

He had to fight a monster on Nitro, January 19, 1999.

Disco Inferno vs. Wrath

The dancer has the Wolfpack shirt and is wearing red and black tights. Wrath shoves him around to start and hits some hard chops. Tony talks about Alex Wright not showing up to be in Disco’s corner for reasons not explained. Hall sneaks out with the tazer as Wrath drives knees into the ribs. Disco comes back with the swinging neckbreaker and dancing elbow for two before we hit the chinlock.

Some shots to the knees have Wrath in more trouble but he backdrops Disco with ease. A hard dropkick puts Disco on the floor and Wrath follows up with a slingshot elbow to the jaw back inside. The Death Penalty looks to set up the Meltdown but Hall uses the Tazer to distract Wrath, allowing Disco to hit the Chartbuster for the upset.

Rating: D+. And that’s it for Wrath meaning anything at all. As soon as the first loss happened you could tell his career was going down, but this is a big fall down for him. This isn’t one that you can say he’s going to bounce back from either. Wrath’s push is officially dead in the water and he’s another talent wasted in WCW.

We’ll jump ahead to Halloween Havoc 1999 with Disco defending his Cruiserweight Title.

Cruiserweight Title: Disco Inferno vs. Lash Leroux

Disco is champion coming in. The massive demon holding the massive pumpkin is always cool to see for the set. It’s shaking here (intentionally) which makes it look even better. Disco takes over to start and Lash isn’t really able to fight back. The ring is really big looking by comparison to the modern WWE one. Out to the floor and Lash goes into the post. He finally gets something going with a combination belly to belly/powerslam for two.

Lash grabs a sleeper and this match is really nothing special. Disco sends him over the top but Lash hangs on. Disco gets the first shot in anyway but the Last Dance (Stunner) misses. A neckbreaker, a middle rope axe handle and a piledriver all get two for the champion. Lash grabs a blue thunder driver (his move according to Tony) for two. They botch…something involving a clothesline and the Last Dance keeps the title on Disco.

Rating: D. It’s passable but this probably belonged on Nitro more than anything else. They weren’t clicking at all and it was really hurting things. Lash wasn’t anything special but he got a lot better once they put him into the MIA. Disco was always around and had a much better career than he’s remembered for. Pretty sloppy match though.

We’ll jump ahead again to Fall Brawl 2000.

Filthy Animals/Big Vito/Paul Orndorff vs. Natural Born Thrillers

Filthy Animals: Konnan, Rey Mysterio, Disco Inferno, Juventud Guerrera, Tygress (female manager)

Natural Born Thrillers: Mark Jindrak, Sean O’Haire, Mike Sanders, Chuck Palumbo, Shawn Stasiak, Reno, Johnny the Bull

This is elimination style. Yes it’s that Paul Orndorff. He trained most of the Thrillers in the Power Plant (the same place that said one Dave Bautista had no future in wrestling) and he drew about 15 years ago so he’s PERFECT here. Orndorff is a mystery partner here. He SHOCKS the Thrillers. OH NO! IT’S ON OVER THE HILL OVERRATED GUY THAT HASN’T MEANT A THING SINCE WE WERE IN 5TH GRADE! Wait….this is WCW and he’s over fifty…..WE’RE SCREWED!!!

Stasiak goes on commentary for no apparent reason. Konnan makes gay jokes and introduced Orndorff. Wow this is so completely overhyped. No one cheers either. They just kind of breathe. Also, we get to see a 51 year old man that looks about twice that old in lime green tights. Rock on brother man.

This was billed as 6-6 but there are so many people that a lot have to drop to the floor, making it look like 4-4. Rey and Juvy are tag champions as I try to fill space. Ok apparently they aren’t….they just have the belts for the second straight PPV in a row. Rey tags in Juvy to absolutely NO reaction. I wasn’t looking at the screen and didn’t even notice it. Normally you get a sound from the crowd to let you know that something happened but there was NOTHING here.

O’Haire hits a Falcon’s Arrow to take down Juvy who of course is fine like 4 seconds later. Vito, the big guy on the team I guess, beats up Jindrak and is only there for Johnny. And here’s Disco to again complete silence. Oh never mind they think that he, a face, sucks. Jimdrak, a guy about 6’5, can’t get a dropkick past the ribs of Disco who is about 6’0. Ok Konnan is in the match despite sitting on the floor so far.

Konnan crashes into Disco so Disco accidently hits him with the Last Dance (Stunner) to eliminate him. Shawn says five to go, implying 6-6 to start. Disco can’t get anyone to tag him in so Vito punches him and Reno Rolls the Dice to end him and make it 6-4 I guess. Vito hits an Edgecution on Palumbo for two. Bull hits Vito in the head with a kendo stick and a Roll of the Dice (rolling cutter, Cross Roads) ends him.

That leaves it as Juvy, Rey and Orndorff left, so Madden suggests that Tygress is on the team too. So then Tony says it’s 6-2 as Orndorff is there for…..oh screw it let’s just get this over with. Guerrera hits a flying…..something to Reno. Tony calls it a body attack which sounds like something from Mortal Kombat. Juvy Driver and WHAT’S UP on Reno makes it however many vs. however many. Oh and over ten minutes in and I think there are 4 people that haven’t even been in yet.

Rey and Juy apparently ARE the tag champions here. Tony said they weren’t 8 minutes ago and now they are. My goodness I know WCW at this time is called insane but I’ve always thought it was overhyped. In this match alone, about ten minutes long at this point, we can’t establish how many original participants there were in this match, we’ve gotten three different answers as to how many people are left on one of the teams at this point, and we don’t even know if two guys are tag team champions? Ok according to Wikipedia they are the champions but are forced to forfeit them tomorrow for no given reason. Now why can I establish that and the paid announcers can’t?

The fans hate Tygress all of a sudden as Juvy’s plancha is just caught. And then HOKEY SMOKE O’Haire and Jindrak LAUNCH Juvy from the floor into the ring off a double hip toss. That looked incredible. A Swanton Bomb ends Juvy…..and here’s Orndorff. Of course he beats up all the young guys but a kendo stick takes care of him. He hits a bad piledriver to get rid of Johnny the Bull.

Rey and Tygress (now on the apron) just let Orndorff get double teamed and do all the work. Sanders hasn’t been in yet. He of course beats up Jindrak and O’Haire on his own, making them look completely weak in the process. He goes to piledrive Jindrak and of course gets hurt coming down, giving himself a stinger (same thing that happened to Austin in 97 off the Owen piledriver) and O’Haire quickly covers him for the pin because of the injury.

Rey and Tygress I guess don’t get that he’s really hurt and keep going on Jindrak. After a pair of Bronco Busters we get the idea so they beat up Sanders and Palumbo to keep the crowd into it I guess. Pay no attention to the fact that they’re landing around Paul’s legs or anything like that. And they stop the match because of the injury. They would conclude it the next night where Rey and Tygress would beat five guys on their own.

Rating: F. There should be two ratings here. The match itself was entertaining and was about a B/B-, but to let a guy in there that was 51 years old and had retired because of a neck injury and then, shocking no one with a brain, hurts his neck in his first match back in like 5 years is simply irresponsible. I don’t care if he swears up and down that he’ll be ok or whatever. You don’t let him into the ring with his neck hurt like that, and this is why.

He wasn’t even taking a bump and he got hurt. Imagine what would have happened if he had been taking am ove and got hurt like this. There is just no way you can validate letting Orndorff go out there. It didn’t sell any more shows because he wasn’t even announced, so this comes off as just irresponsible by WCW and there’s no way that is ok in my mind.

Off to Germany for a show not many people have ever heard of called Millennium Final.

Tag Titles: Boogie Knights vs. Mark Jindrak/Sean O’Haire

So the non dancers are the champions here, but Disco Inferno is hurt. Since we need to have a German win the belts though, we have Alex Wright teaming with General Rection for no apparent reason at all and he’s wearing a sweatshirt despite wearing tights in the previous match. Rection isn’t US Champion here as you saw a little bit ago but he’s announced as it and holds up a German flag. He and Jindrak start us off.

We hear that Wright has been inserted into the Triangle Match later on to qualify for the Europe Cup with Awesome and Nash. It’s weird but slowly and surely you get to understand German to an extent. Wright hits a sweet double nip up to get back up. That was awesome. They mention the Dancing Fools and Berlin but say tonight it’s just Alex Wright. Now why couldn’t we get this Alex Wright in America? This guy is freaking awesome.

The heels take over on Rection to set up the insanely hot tag that’s coming soon. The General looks like a fat Jeff Hardy. And we hit an arm bar ten minutes into the match. That fails to make sense but it’s WCW so whatever. The Seanton Bomb misses and there’s the hot one. Actually make that a slight fever one.

There was a tiny pop at best. And he’s getting beaten up now. This is already making my head hurt badly. I think Alex forgets to kick out of a rollup meaning that Mark has to just kind of let it go which looks completely stupid. Wright hits a missile dropkick from the top for the pin and the titles for him and Disco and a huge pop.

Rating: C-. Odd booking aside, this was all so that Wright could get a huge pop and that’s fine. He’s the hometown boy and he deserves a moment like this. I think it was mentioned on TV as a European match but Rection was never mentioned so there we are. This wasn’t bad but it wasn’t anything worth watching either. It’s your standard TV match which is fine. Not a great match but a cool moment.

After WCW went under, Disco would head to the WWA promotion and appear at their Revolution event.

Disco Inferno vs. Scott Steiner

Total dominance by Steiner that ends with the Steiner Recliner in about two minutes. Disco got in as much offense as a career comedy character would on a big name power guy.

He would appear in TNA a few times, including this match at Turning Point 2004.

Pat Kenney/Johnny B. Badd vs. Glen Gilbertti/Johnny Swinger

Gilbertti and Swinger are known as the New York Connection. Great: Jacqueline is the referee. Kenney is kind of famous as Simon Diamond from ECW. He and Swinger were a tag team in ECW so theres history there. Theres no story here that I can find so were in filler territory. Kenney and Swinger start as the fans chant Simon Diamond. Simon (screw it) fights off both of the NYC until Gilbertti is sent outside.

Off to Badd who looks really weird with short hair. The NYC double teams Simon to take over. Badd seems content to chill on the apron. Its not a heel move or anything. He just doesnt seem to care. Jackie breaks up some double teaming and Swinger gets two off a clothesline. They work on Simons back which was injured in the match somewhere. Simon hits a sitout spinebuster on Swinger which allows the tag to Badd. Both heels get knee lfits TKO to Glenn is broken up by Swinger. Gilbertti shoves Jackie and Stuns Badd but Jackie gets involved (of course) and slams Gilbertti. TKO by Badd ends this.

Rating: D. Imagine that: Jackie messes up a match. To be fair though the match was boring, mainly because there was no real story to this. The NYC were one of the leftovers from the older run of the company so they were brought along for about five minutes. This was nothing of note though and was pretty bad. To be fair though, it was just there to bridge us to the second half of the show.

One more match from the World Wrestling Legends reunion show.

Disco Inferno vs. Koko B. Ware

Disco is doing even more of his gimmicky stuff than ever. Koko doesn’t have a bird with him. Frankie died a few years ago so there’s a possible explanation. Koko is fat again. Disco jumps him and thankfully they’re in shirts here. Disco is the heel here too. Koko has green hair so the announcers are trying to figure out what it might be.

Pretty much nothing but punches and kicks here. Chinlock sequence to Koko who gets to make the big face comeback. Disco is more concerned with his hair than with the match which is something kind of funny. He misses an elbow and here comes the Bird Man. Last Dance is countered into a bulldog for the pin. Longest match of the night so far at 4 minutes.

Rating: F+. Yeah it was just punching and kicking here but they didn’t try for anything special. This whole show is like that: it’s not about the wrestling but rather just being there and getting to come out to in front of the crowd one more time. That’s perfectly fine and they’re not trying to make this all serious like they did with Heroes of Wrestling. The result: this is fun.

Disco Inferno is actually an interesting story. He isn’t the most talented guy in the world and he was given a horrible character, but he turned it into a long and successful career. Disco won the TV, Cruiserweight and Tag Team Titles which is a better run than a lot of other wrestlers could hope to do. I was lucky enough to talk to him a few times when he worked for WrestleZone and he’s actually a nice guy. The guy was goofy but he made it work and that’s very commendable.

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