Impact Wrestling – August 26, 2015: Good Grief This Is Lame
Impact Wrestling Date: August 26, 2015
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: D’Angelo Dinero, Josh Matthews
It’s week three of the GFW era in TNA and there’s a chance that Jeff Jarrett is going to take over as the full time boss. There is no way this could go badly for TNA of course. Other than that we have Eric Young vs. Chris Melendez for Chris’ leg because they need something to keep the feud going. Let’s get to it.
We open with a quick recap of all the GFW stuff so far.
Here are the Hardys to open things up. Jeff says he’s glad to be back and talks about the gold they’ve won everywhere. He knows Matt will be the next World Champion so Matt thanks all of the fans for their support. Matt reiterates that he wants the title so here are Ethan Carter III and Tyrus to respond.
Ethan talks about meeting the men who inspired him to start wrestling in 1999 and being so disappointed. Now he’s beaten Matt in Matt’s own match and Jeff is just a daredevil who can’t stick a landing. Jeff offers to beat him with a chair since he can’t wrestle yet, but instead Ethan just grants Matt his rematch request. However, if Ethan retains, Jeff becomes his personal assistant. Do you really want Jeff doing household chores? I could see this ending with a big fire.
We recap Eric Young vs. Chris Melendez, which has seen Young beating him at every turn but Melendez keeps coming. Now he’s putting up his prosthetic leg for one more match. Sure why not.
Young says he can’t be held responsible for what happens next.
Eric Young vs. Chris Melendez
Young quickly takes over to start and tries to rip the leg off early. Instead he settles for a chinlock but Melendez fights up with some clotheslines. A Bubba Bomb (remember he was trained by Team 3D) puts Eric down but he rakes the eyes to keep Chris in trouble. The piledriver is broken up so Young rolls him up and puts his feet on the ropes for the pin at 3:15.
Rating: D. Now that’s it right? There’s no more reason for these two to fight and they’re never going to again right? The match was nothing due to the time, but the fact that Chris Melendez was in there didn’t do it any favors either. When I’m happier to see Eric Young, you can tell something is bad.
Young demands the leg right now and Melendez hands it over, only after hopping along because Young keeps backing up.
X-Division Title: Tigre Uno vs. DJZ vs. Sonjay Dutt
Tigre is defending and of course there’s no story here. DJZ dropkicks Tigre to the floor to start but walks into a hurricanrana. Sonjay sends him out to the floor and nails a flip dive off the apron to the fans mild boredom. Back in and Tigre misses a corkscrew moonsault, allowing DJZ to come back with a quick gutbuster to the champ. Dutt comes back in for a tornado DDT on the champ but the challengers clothesline each other to put all three guys down. DJZ is up first but gets German suplexed into the corner, setting up Tigre’s springboard splash to retain at 5:03.
Rating: C. Well they had five minutes, no story and some decent spots. Standard X-Division all the way here, but I still have no idea why I’m supposed to care about Tigre. Yeah he’s held the title for a few months, but I don’t know anything about him. Oh wait he loves his hometown and doesn’t like Donald Trump. That’s all they’ve got on him and that’s not enough to overcome some mediocre title defenses with no story.
James Storm demands that Manik and Abyss win the Tag Team Titles and no more dancing from Manik.
Recap of the opening segment.
Tag Team Titles: Wolves vs. Abyss/Manik
Abyss/Manik are challenging. Davey and Abyss get things going and the monster shoves the champ down with ease. It’s off to Eddie to try his luck to little effect as Abyss pounds on him as well. Manik comes in and gets beaten up in the corner. Davey gets dragged into the Revolution’s corner though and Abyss comes back in to choke in and splash. Manik gets two off a belly to back and it’s time to crank on the arms.
A dropkick stops Davey’s comeback as Josh talks about Wolves Nation. How many nations can there possibly be? Davey finally gets over for the tag so Eddie can clean house, only to have Abyss grab both champions by the throat. The Wolves backflip out (that looked cool) and kick Abyss down, setting up a double missile dropkick in the corner. Cue Storm to break up whatever the Wolves had planned but Mahabali Sheera comes out to chase Storm off. The powerbomb into a backstabber is enough to put Manik away and retain the titles at 6:19.
Rating: C+. I liked this match better than I was expecting to as you had the challengers actually feeling like more than just a throw together team, even though they’ve badly had a single match together. Good enough match here though and the Wolves are still fun to see with that precision offense.
Jeff Hardy accepts Ethan’s challenge. This could have been tacked on to the first segment to save some time.
We recap Jeff Jarrett’s return to the company.
Knockouts Title: Velvet Sky vs. Brooke
Brooke is defending in what should be an obvious ending. Feeling out process to start with neither being able to get much of an advantage. A Russian legsweep gets two for the champ and she forearms Velvet down with a hard shot. Velvet comes back with a running neckbreaker for tow but they clothesline each other down. Brooke knocks her to the floor but doesn’t want a countout. Instead she whips Velvet into the steps but here’s the Dollhouse for the DQ at 3:54.
Rating: D+. Yeah whatever. I would get into the Dollhouse again but with Gail Kim around, it’s kind of a waste of time because Gail is going to end the team like a heroine is supposed to do. Another match that didn’t have time to go anywhere either, which gets old in a hurry. At least Velvet didn’t get the title back in a nothing match.
The beatdown is on but here’s Rebel of all people to….join the Dollhouse and help beat Velvet down as Taryn laughs from the back.
Roode says he’ll win.
Anderson says he’ll win tonight.
Drew Galloway gets bad news on the phone.
Mr. Anderson vs. James Storm vs. Bobby Roode vs. Lashley
Winner gets PJ Black for the King of the Mountain Title next week. It’s a brawl to start and all four head outside to fight. Roode can’t suplex Lashley on the ramp so Lashley and Anderson clean house, only to turn it into a standoff as we take a break. Back with Roode and Storm having an old school standoff to a smattering of applause. Dinero: “They’re facing off…..again.”
Roode gets two off a quick neckbreaker but Anderson breaks it up. Lashley is back in as well for a superplex to Storm. Anderson misses a swanton bomb and gets clotheslined by Storm but they both head outside. Lashley turns Roode inside out off a clothesline but Roode knees out of a delayed vertical. The Roode Bomb is blocked by a grab of the ropes, only to have Storm come back in with a Codebreaker.
Anderson’s swinging neckbreaker puts Storm down and the Mic Check gets two on Roode. Lashley spears Anderson to the floor, only to charge into the Last Call. We’re down to Roode vs. Storm again and the Beer Money chant sets up a double suplex on Anderson. They load up the signature taunt but the Roode Bomb plants Storm for the pin at 13:30.
Rating: C+. Fun match here but what’s it for? A shot at a title that doesn’t actually belong to this company? Roode winning is the logical choice and Storm is the perfect one to take the fall since he’s on his way out. They kept this moving fast enough to make the match work and that’s all you can do here.
Velvet Sky, Gail Kim and Brooke are all on the cover of the calendar. So much for the competition.
Ethan is pleased with the Hardys’ decision.
Here’s Dixie for the big announcement about Jarrett being in charge going forward. She says the best times in this company’s history have been when two people are working together on top. Jeff is invited to the ring and thanks Dixie for that surprise phone call a month or so ago. They have something special going with this partnership and Dixie believes they’re unstoppable when they work together. Sweet goodness have you looked into being stopped? This brings out Drew Galloway with news as we go to a break.
Back with Drew going on about the dark cloud of the attacks over TNA. After praising Jeff, Drew thinks it’s weird that there are no clues, but he put his criminology degree to use (that’s a cool idea for a change) and said there’s only one clue: the license plates of the getaway cars. And what do you know: they’re both registered to Jeff Jarrett. You know, the guy he was praising a minute ago.
Jeff says no way but here’s Karen Jarrett to say she did it for her husband, her family and for GFW. She says one little spark can cause a giant inferno. With that, Jeff kicks Drew low and here are the GFW guys to beat Galloway down. Some TNA midcarders run out for an attempt at a save but get beaten down as well. The Wolves take a beating too and GFW poses to end the show. Good night this felt lame. Like wow, JEFF JARRETT turning his back on someone? Who would have seen that coming? And Chris Masters and Justin Gabriel as top villains? This really is the best they can do too, and that’s pathetic.
Overall Rating: C-. Yeah fine. The wrestling was watchable here but there’s so little here as far as storylines go. Jeff Jarrett as the big bad is supposed to be the major story? Another Matt Hardy vs. Ethan Carter III match? I know their TV is running out, but they’re not exactly lighting the world on fire to make me want to see more. The show was decent enough this week, but it’s nothing worth seeing, as is almost always the case around here. By the way, that last segment: longer than any match tonight.
Results
Eric Young b. Chris Melendez – Rollup with feet on the ropes
Tigre Uno b. DJZ and Sonjay Dutt – Springboard splash to DJZ
Wolves b. Manik/Abyss – Powerbomb/backstabber combo to Manik
Brooke b. Velvet Sky via DQ when the Dollhouse interfered
Bobby Roode b. James Storm, Lashley and Mr. Anderson – Roode Bomb to Storm
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Impact Wrestling – August 19, 2015: Give Me A Reason To Care
Impact Wrestling Date: August 19, 2015
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D’Angelo Dinero
We’re at war! Well, sort of. Last week the Global Force roster (well some of it at least) arrived to help out, with GFW boss Jeff Jarrett insisting that it was certainly not an invasion. It’s not clear where things go from here but they’re here for another night and Jarrett is in charge again. Let’s get to it.
We open with a recap of last week with PJ Black winning the King of the Mountain Title.
Tonight is Turning Point, despite it being a pretty standard show.
Here are the Jarretts to get things going. Jeff says everyone is buzzing about last week and Global Force has turned the wrestling world upside down. Uh, yeah that’s one way to put it Jeff. Tonight it’s time to make history though as PJ Black is challenging Ethan Carter III for the TNA World Title. This brings out Ethan, who says he isn’t fighting Black tonight.
Karen Jarrett tells Ethan who Jeff is and reminds him that Jeff still has ownership in this company. Maybe Ethan is upset because his aunt picked Jeff to be in charge instead of him. Then you had Bully Ray and Drew Galloway stand up and get attacked. Where was Ethan when that happened? Ethan goes to leave but Jeff threatens to call the board of directors and have him stripped of the title if he doesn’t defend tonight.
Drew Galloway wants to know what’s going on with the attacks on him and Bully Ray. He thinks it was Eli Drake, who he has in a No DQ match tonight.
Bram vs. Mr. Anderson
This is an Open Mic challenge, meaning the microphone is above the ring and can be used as a weapon. Anderson starts fast with some clotheslines and it’s already table time. Shouldn’t that be a DQ since it’s not the mic? The rules say nothing about tables. The Regal Roll through the table crushes Bram but knocks Anderson silly at the same time. Bram stops Anderson’s climb up the ladder (notice that this is the second ladder based match in a week) and plants him with the Brighter Side of Suffering.
It’s still not enough to let Bram get the mic so he throws in about ten chairs. Another Brighter Side of Suffering is countered and Anderson whips him into the ladder. Anderson takes too long going up though and gets powerbombed onto the chairs, allowing Bram to go get the mic. He takes too long talking trash though, allowing Anderson to Mic Check him onto the chairs. Some mic shots to the head knock Bram silly so Anderson can say he didn’t understand a word Bram just said. One last mic shot to the head is enough to pin Bram at 9:08.
Rating: D+. This was a great example of TNA’s storytelling issues in a nutshell. They’ve been feuding for a few weeks for reasons that aren’t entirely clear, and then they had a gimmick match where the object the match was built around played a tiny role in what happened. I don’t know why they were fighting, I have no reason to care about them fighting, and then Anderson beats the young star in the young star’s kind of match. What did this accomplish?
Jeff Jarrett blows Bobby Roode off.
Ethan doesn’t want to be stripped of the title.
Here’s the Revolution with something to say. Storm says they may not be blood, but their bond to each other makes them family. Some people have said that Storm was too hard on someone, so get out here now Khoya. Here’s Mahabali Sheera (formerly known as Khoya), who Storm admits he might have been too hard on. Storm says he was hard on Sheera to show him the way. Sheera came to this country knowing nothing so Storm took him under his wing and into his home.
That’s why Storm wants him back in the Revolution, but Khoya says his name is Mahabali Sheera and he is his own man who won’t be slapped around like trash. Who slaps trash? Like these people, he likes to have fun and to dance. Everyone here must like to dance, so Sheera goes to the floor and starts to dance as Storm looks like he’s about to explode. By dance I mean cross his arms and move his shoulders back and forth.
Sheera gets back in the ring and punches Storm, earning him a beatdown from Abyss. A chokeslam puts Sheera down and Manik gives him a reluctant frog splash, setting up the Last Call from Storm. So they broke Khoya out of the Revolution and now he’s a dancer. Why am I even slightly surprised by this?
PJ Black says he’s winning the title tonight. Eric Young comes in and says he’s taking what he wants from whoever he wants.
Jade/Marti Belle vs. Gail Kim
In a cage with pins, submissions or escape. Gail rolls around and forearms both girls to start before scoring with a double clothesline. Jade starts choking, which is totally legal because Florida laws are suspended if a cage match is in progress. They send Gail into the cage and it’s time for a break.
Back with Jade breaking up Gail’s armbreaker on Marti and the double teaming begins. It’s time to climb the cage and Gail is able to hurricanrana Marti down, only to get decked by Jade for two. Gail is sat on top but shoves both girls off, only to have Kim climb up and dive onto the Dollhouse. A DDT puts Jade and Marti down for two but Marti is up to stomp away. That’s fine with Gail who suplexes both of them down and Marti cross bodies Jade by mistake, setting up Eat Defeat to pin Marti at 9:46.
Rating: D. So in case you didn’t know it, Gail Kim is the greatest Knockout of all time and her name must be praised forever because she is THE GREATEST KNOCKOUT OF ALL TIME. That’s all this match was about: showcasing Gail, who has been around forever and stopped being interesting about seven years ago. There was no need for this to be in a cage either, making the mess of a match even worse.
Dixie tells Ethan that he’s either defending or he’s stripped. In other words, this segment changes nothing whatsoever and really didn’t need to be included.
Back from a break with Gail, who Josh describes as the greatest Knockout of all time, is looking for Taryn.
Matt Hardy promises to be in Ethan’s face no matter what. This earns him a match with Tyrus.
Eli Drake, with a leather X across his chest (think He-Man), says he’s going to prove that he’s better than Drew Galloway.
Drew Galloway vs. Eli Drake
No DQ. They fight to the floor early on with Drake getting in some chair shots to the ribs. We hit the chinlock on Drew for a bit before Eli throws him to the floor. Back in and Drew goes off with forearms in the corner until Drake kicks him low and nails a DDT onto the chair.
Drew kicks out again and it’s table time (to be fair it had been a whole hour since we saw one), only to have Drake baseball slide it into his face. Drake finds a crutch, because you have to use the same weapon that started a feud, and breaks it over Drew’s back, only to get caught trying to put Drew on the table. Instead, Drew gives him a White Noise through the table for the pin at 9:41.
Rating: C-. The match was fine but as usual, TNA starts something a few weeks ago and I have no real reason to care about yet another hardcore match. We just had something like this earlier tonight with a cage match in the middle. This isn’t even a hardcore themed show but this is how TNA does feuds: you have a match, then you have a gimmick match, then you keep having gimmick matches without much in between to make you care about why the people are fighting. They’re just fighting because they did before and the last match validates a rematch.
Taryn is running from Gail but finds Velvet Sky who won’t let her move. This was a ten second scene that came immediately after Drew got his pin and then it was off to a preview of what’s still to come. This is one of TNA’s biggest problems: they jump from thing to thing so fast that there isn’t time for any of them to sink in. There’s too much stuff going on every week and it makes it hard to care about anything.
Back from a break with Velvet backing Taryn up into Gail. Kim handcuffs her to a post and Velvet says the camera doesn’t need to see this.
Eric Young comes out and says he’s the best in the world and should be in the main event tonight. This brings out Chris Melendez to protest. Good grief why is this still going? Melendez says he never quit, just like he didn’t in Baghdad. Young points out the obvious: he has nothing to gain from Melendez. Chris keeps badgering him and Eric keeps saying no in a scene straight out of Family Matters with Urkel and Carl. Finally Eric agrees if Melendez will put up his leg. The deal is made and Young’s piledriver is countered as Melendez stands tall. For now, until he loses because he sucks.
Dixie has a plan in case Ethan forfeits the title. Jeff wants to talk to her about something else but she wants to get through this first.
Matt Hardy vs. Tyrus
Tyrus slams Matt down and hits a quick Vader Bomb before throwing him outside. A few elbow drops crush Matt’s ribs and this is one sided so far. Back in and two Twists of Fate give Matt the pin at 2:16. Well that happened.
Ethan Carter comes out and hits Matt with the title before ordering Jeff Jarrett to send out his best for the title match.
TNA World Title: Ethan Carter III vs. PJ Black
Ethan is defending and I’ll only refer to him as the champion. Carter goes after Black in the corner and pounds him down before slapping on an early chinlock. Black fights up with some cross bodies in the corner, followed by a top rope cross body for two. It’s already time for the 450 but Carter pulls him down with a superplex for two.
Black kicks him in the face and gets two of his own off a top rope Lionsault. A rollup gets two for the champ and he lifts Black up into a powerbomb for two more. The 1%er is countered into a Blue Thunder Bomb for two and Black wins a slugout. He connects with the springboard 450 and Carter is up at two, pretty much ending Black’s chances of winning. Carter crotches him on the top and the 1%er retains the title at 8:15.
Rating: D+. Not bad but here’s the thing: what do we know about Black other than he’s a high flier, he used to be Justin Gabriel and his finishing move (which is now 0/1) is a 450 splash? Somehow that’s the GFW Champion for all intents and purposes and he just lost clean after hitting his finisher. Boring match too as they had to fly through everything.
Why did they have to fly through everything? For more Dixie of course! Jeff wants to keep the momentum going after two weeks of him being in charge working. Therefore, he wants to be the full time boss. Ever the dumbest person in the history of wrestling (even Sting had to explain things to her), Dixie feels good about it but asks for a week to think about it.
An ad for next week ends the show and they’re off the air at 10:59.
Overall Rating: D. There was not a single thing on this show that I cared about. It was two hours of mostly bad wrestling with stories that are barely explained or are just continuing because the guys have nothing else to do. This is the best they can do for a special episode?
What is supposed to make me want to keep watching? To find out who attacked Bully Ray and Galloway? Well Drew said it was Drake and then beat him, so that story is wrapped up for now. Uh…maybe to find out what else Jeff wanted to talk about? Seriously what else is there? This company is really boring right now and that’s a lot worse than being bad.
Results
Mr. Anderson b. Bram – Mic to the head
Gail Kim b. Jade/Marti Belle – Eat Defeat to Belle
Drew Galloway b. Eli Drake – White Noise through a table
Matt Hardy b. Tyrus – Twist of Fate
Ethan Carter III b. PJ Black – 1%er
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of NXT Reviews: The Full Sail Years Volume I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:
Impact Wrestling Date: August 5, 2015
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: D’Angelo Dinero, Josh Matthews
Tonight is No Surrender as TNA presents another major show as a regular TV episode. The main event will see Matt Hardy challenging for the World Title against Ethan Carter III in a Full Metal Mayhem match, along with Austin Aries vs. Rockstar Spud for the Rockstar moniker. Let’s get to it.
We open with a quick Roddy Piper tribute. That’s nice of them.
Bram vs. Mr. Anderson
This has been a well built match with Anderson worrying about putting his career on the line against a monster like Bram. Bram has the microphone that he used to bust Anderson open a few weeks back. Anderson goes right after Bram to start and knocks him out to the floor with a clothesline. Back in and Anderson clotheslines him out to the floor again. This time Anderson clotheslines him on the floor to mix things up a bit but Bram is able to get in a few shots and take Anderson to the floor on his own terms.
Anderson gets dropped face first into the apron and Bram ties him up in the ring skirt for good measure. They’ve done a good job here of having Anderson try to wrestle and Bram sticking with the brawling. A chinlock has Anderson in more trouble but he fights up with right hands and the Regal Roll for two. Bram gets the same off a superplex as they’ve now switched their styles. An Edge-O-Matic and spinwheel kick get two each for Bram and now it’s his turn to hit some clotheslines. It’s microphone time for Bram but Anderson counters into a small package for the pin at 9:29.
Rating: C. I liked this one a lot more than I was expecting to but it wasn’t the most interesting match in the world. Bram just being violent against midcarders has gotten him about as far as it can and now it’s time for him to have a major feud against someone. They told a decent enough story though and that’s really all that matters.
Bram nails Anderson with the mic and calls him Mr. Pathetic. That’s the best line they can come up with?
The Hardys talk about always defying the odds and promise Matt wins the World Title tonight.
Here’s James Storm to rant about his loss last week. There’s one man to blame for the loss and that’s Khoya. Storm demands that Khoya get out here because Storm got him out of that horrible country and gave him a life. He slaps Khoya in the face and that’s enough to make Khoya snap and lay Storm out. Khoya rants about how he’s proud of his heritage and is a proud Indian man named Mahabali Shera. Now, DO SOMETHING WITH HIM.
We recap Gail Kim vs. the Dollhouse, which sets up a three on one handicap match tonight.
Storm wants Shera tonight.
Gail Kim vs. Dollhouse
One fall to a finish and tags are required so Gail rolls away from Marti Belle to start. Taryn sends the lackeys after Gail to start but a glare sends Taryn running back to the apron. A dropkick to Jade’s back gets two as Pope starts reading tweets from fans. Jade gets two off a German suplex but heel miscommunication lets Gail take over again. A running tornado DDT plants Marti and Taryn runs off, leaving Gail to beat up both other members. The referee won’t count a pin on Jade because she’s not legal, even though all three are in at the same time. Eat Defeat is enough to pin Marti at 5:10.
Rating: D+. Hey, did you know that Gail Kim is like, a serious wrestler and doesn’t tolerate silly gimmicks? She’s basically Lance Storm and that’s not something I’m really all that interested in watching, especially not on and off for the better part of ten years. I don’t need to see her do the same feud she did with the Beautiful People, but that’s how the Knockouts work: someone new gets over and then here’s Gail Kim to remind everyone how great a wrestler she is while putting half the audience to sleep.
Drew Galloway talks about Eli Drake and how he didn’t build the Rising for one man to tear it down.
Drew Galloway vs. Eli Drake
Grudge match after Drake cost Galloway the World Title a few weeks back. It’s a brawl on the outside before the bell with Drew in full control and dropping Drake on the floor. A clothesline off the step drops Eli again before they head inside for the opening bell. The threat of a Future Shock sends Drake running up the ramp but Drew is there with another clothesline.
Eli finally gets in some shots of his own to take over, allowing for some choking in the corner back inside. A release German suplex sends Drake flying into the corner. Drew: “STAND UP!” Like a good villain, Eli goes to the eyes and rolls Drew up with a handful of trunks and a hand on the ropes for the pin at 3:50.
Rating: C. Nothing special here but Galloway and Drake are clearly stars of the future. The fallout of the Rising is already more interesting than the Rising ever was, which says a lot about how lame of a group they really were. I’m sure we’ll see these two fight again before Drew goes on to something bigger.
We recap Aries vs. Spud with Aries shooting his mouth off and putting his career on the line as a result.
Bobby Roode comes in to see Bully Ray (remember him?) and threatens to help Aries win tonight. Ray implies he’ll be at ringside to make sure that doesn’t happen.
Rockstar Spud vs. Austin Aries
The winner gets to keep the Rockstar moniker but Aries’ career is on the line as well. Aries quickly takes Spud to the mat for the Last Chancery but, as almost always, the move doesn’t work. A nice armdrag puts Spud down again and Aries nails a basement dropkick to send Spud into the corner. Aries keeps his full control with an STO, followed by the Pendulum Elbow for two. So are we just not getting Roode and Bully after that segment?
Back up and Aries charges into a boot in the corner, followed by a dropkick to the knee. Spud starts firing off some running forearms but the Underdog is broken up. Aries scores with a belly to back for two and we hit the Last Chancery again. That goes nowhere so it’s brainbuster time, only to have Spud small package his way out for two. This is really starting to pick up.
Some discus forearms rock the Rockstar and the brainbuster connects for two. Aries is stunned but Spud makes the big hero comeback. The big wind-up punch takes too long but the second attempt knocks Aries outside. A big flip dive takes Aries down again and a high cross body gives Spud a near fall. The Underdog is broken up but Aries sets him on top, only to be countered into a super Underdog to give Spud the pin at 11:20.
Rating: B. This started slowly but got much better as things kept going. Spud is awesome in the underdog role and Aries can make almost any match work. I can’t blame him for leaving though as there’s nothing left for him to do in TNA, especially since they’re not going to put him back in the World Title hunt anytime soon.
Aries raises Spud’s hand post match.
Post break, Aries and Roode say goodbye, saying they know they’ll both land on their feet.
Mahabali Shera vs. James Storm
Shera is in jeans. Storm takes him into the corner to start and shouts in his face. Shera will have nothing to do with these right hands to the face and makes his comeback, only to take the cowbell to the head for the DQ at 1:42.
Bully is down in the back.
Post match Jeff Jarrett comes in to see Dixie Carter, who is worried about Bully. Jeff offers to let Global Force help by offering to run the show for one week. Dixie isn’t sure but it seems to be a deal for next week. I guess this is where the invasion begins and for some reason I’m expecting this to be disappointing.
Ethan Carter III says he’ll retain the title tonight as Tyrus holds up the belt.
TNA World Title: Matt Hardy vs. Ethan Carter III
Carter is defending in Full Metal Mayhem, which is TNA’s version of TLC. The champ takes over early on with a chair to the back before sitting down so he can punch Matt from eye level. That earns him a Side Effect through the chair and it’s already ladder time, which goes upside Ethan’s face. The ladder is laid across the middle corner so Carter can be rammed face first as Matt is in full control.
It’s time to go up but it’s WAY too early on, allowing Ethan to chair Matt in the leg. Why would you ever go up that early on? Back from a break with Matt breaking up Carter’s attempt at the belt by sending Ethan down into the buckle. Matt isn’t done yet as he drives the ladder into Ethan’s crotch to prevent another generation of Carter’s from populating the earth. That’s still not enough for Matt to get the title so he plants Ethan with the Twist of Fate.
A moonsault through the table is broken up with a quick crotching and a powerbomb through the wood but Matt is up again with a powerbomb of his own to break up Carter’s climb. They head outside with Matt bridging a ladder between the steps and the ring, only to get slammed head first onto the ladder. Since we haven’t had enough near climbs yet, Matt makes another save and hits a Side Effect onto the apron.
A guillotine legdrop drives Carter through the table on the floor but Matt takes way too long to climb, allowing Ethan to chair him in the leg. They already have to repeat spots for the saves? Carter climbs up, shoves Matt down and pulls the title off the hook to retain at 20:10.
Rating: B. Fun enough match but there was no reason for this to involve ladders and weapons other than so TNA could have a match involving ladders and weapons. It’s their first match against each other for the title and they used the big gimmick already. Matt became #1 contender for thrown together reasons and that’s not how you want to have a major match like this. It was fun, but I have no desire to watch it again. At least Carter won on his own for a change too.
Overall Rating: B-. As usual, TNA can do the big shows well enough but they’ll likely be back to the same dull stuff in a few weeks. If you believe the reports, none of this really matters as they’ll be off TV in less than two months anyway so at least we still had one good show on the way out. Their midcard continues to be lame, but the wrestling was good enough to carry things for a week.
Results
Mr. Anderson b. Bram – Small package
Gail Kim b. Dollhouse – Eat Defeat to Belle
Eli Drake b. Drew Galloway – Rollup with a handful of trunks
Rockstar Spud b. Austin Aries – Super Underdog
Mahabali Shera b. James Storm via DQ when Storm used a cowbell
Ethan Carter III b. Matt Hardy – Carter pulled down the title
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Impact Wrestling – July 29, 2015: Oh Shut Up Already
Impact Wrestling Date: July 29, 2015
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: D’Angelo Dinero, Josh Matthews
The big story coming out of last week is Matt Hardy earning the #1 contendership in a tables match over Bobby Roode. This was the result of the night’s main story being thrown out due to the Hernandez issue, which is likely going to cause even more problems tonight. Other than changing things up though, we do get Jeff Jarrett’s Hall of Fame induction. Let’s get to it.
We open with a recap of last week’s major events, including Jeff Jarrett being announced as the next Hall of Fame inductee, Serena being announced as James Storm’s partner and Matt Hardy becoming #1 contender.
Here’s Austin Aries with something to say. Aries may not have a title right now, but politics and backstage issues aside, there is no one on the face of this planet who is better than he is. Therefore, why wasn’t he involved in the #1 contenders match last week? Bully Ray may be in charge but he’s already off to a bad start with mistakes like that.
Cue Bully Ray, who says his opinion is the only one that matters. Sure Aries is great. He’s so great that he even beat Bully himself at one point. Aries is going to get another shot at what he deserves. Austin interprets that as a World Title shot but Ray says Aries already lost that chance. In that case, Aries will settle for a Tag Team Title shot with Bobby Roode. That’s a no as well, so Aries can challenge for the X-Division Title later tonight.
Aries isn’t happy because that title is beneath him. The X-Division Title is for people like Rockstar Spud, who comes out in objection. Spud is a big Aries fan, but a statement like he just made hurts. Option C gave people like Spud a chance to be World Heavyweight Champion because it gave them a reason to believe in themselves. Austin laughs this off because Option C was made for people like himself, not Rockstar Spud.
Yeah Angle beat him once, but that would only happen one out of ten times. Spud on the other hand would lost to him every time. Since Aries has nothing to do tonight, why doesn’t he beat Spud up instead? Spud thinks he can beat Aries instead of just hanging with him, which makes Aries say he’ll leave if he loses tonight. Ray accepts that as a contract and the match is on for later tonight. Aries agrees, but wants the Rockstar moniker if he wins.
The Jarretts are here.
Chris Melendez tells Kurt Angle that he has to beat Eric Young to move forward in his career.
Sgt. Chris Melendez vs. Eric Young
Angle is out with Chris. Before the match, Melendez says he’ll keep fighting no matter what, just like he did overseas. Young comes out and says Melendez doesn’t want him coming in there because it will end badly for him. The bell rings and Eric slaps him in the back of the head a few times as we’re suddenly told Aries vs. Spud is next week at No Surrender. Is there even a point to having specials when they’re the same shows we get every week? Young stays on him and drives some elbows into the back of the head before a quick piledriver is good for the pin 3:12. Well that was a waste of time.
Rating: D. TNA, I know Melendez is a cool story, but there is nothing interesting about him. He’s nothing special in the ring, he’s nothing special on the mic and his one legged gimmick is long past its expiration date. What is there about him that is supposed to interest me? Nothing to see here and I have a feeling it’s going to keep going.
Sting Hall of Fame video.
Matt Hardy doesn’t know what stipulation he’s picking for his title match against Ethan Carter III. “We will announce the stipulation later.” JB wants to know who the other half of we is, even though it was already announced next week.
Knockouts Title: Brooke vs. Marti Bell
Brooke is defending yeah this is just the token title defense against the former champion’s lackey. The champ cleans house to start but goes after Taryn (in a tutu), allowing Marti to get in a cheap shot to take over. Brooke comes back with a quick shot to the face for two, only to have a kick to the jaw change control back to Marti. A superplex is broken up though and Brooke nails a middle rope clothesline. Brooke gets two off a Russian legsweep but the Dollhouse tries to interfere, only to have Gail Kim…..play her entrance video for a distraction, allowing Brooke to hit the Butterface Maker on Marti to retain at 4:40.
Rating: D. I’m so sick of this division. They had something interesting in the Dollhouse but they take the title off Taryn for the sake of pushing Brooke, who is there for one thing and one thing only. Oh and we get Gail Kim being all serious because what else is she supposed to do? Lame match too.
Kurt Angle Hall of Fame video.
More from Tigre Uno in Tijuana, this time talking about what TNA has done for his family. He loves lucha libre and thinks it’s better than anything in the world. These aren’t exactly thrilling statements.
Tigre Uno calls Donald Trump a coward.
Ethan Carter III isn’t worried about what stipulation Matt picks.
Here are Carter and Tyrus for Matt’s announcement. Remember when World Title matches were just wrestling matches? After saying Bully sucks eggs, Carter rips on the Hardys for being a couple of North Carolina hillbillies. If this was against Jeff Hardy then maybe Ethan would be worried but Jeff broke his leg on a motocross bike. Ethan says Matt isn’t a World Title contender so here’s Jeff to object.
Jeff admits that he cried from the pain of his broken leg but he conquers fears. Before Carter knows it he’ll be dropping titanium shins on Ethan’s face. Before Carter knows it, Jeff will be the next World Champion. It’s nice to see Jeff admitting that his brother has no chance. This brings out Matt who draws a NEXT WORLD CHAMP chant.
Matt talks about the Hardys being told they can’t do it and always proving people wrong. It’s not a competition between the brothers to see who is best, which is why Jeff is supporting him this week. Jeff gets to make the announcement but instead of saying anything, he asks Matt to pull some stuff out from under the ring. Matt pulls out a table, a chair and a ladder because WHAT ELSE WOULD THE HARDYS PICK??? In case it’s not clear, next week is Full Metal Mayhem. On top of that, no one is allowed at ringside during the match. This took WAY too much time for the only possible conclusion.
Team 3D Hall of Fame video.
Magnus and Mickie James are ready for James Storm and Serena.
James Storm/Serena vs. Mickie James/Magnus
This is a result of Storm being a psycho who tried to get Mickie in the ring for one last match as a way to get inside her head and make her join the Revolution. The guys officially get things going with Magnus in control until Storm gets in a knee from the apron. Storm slaps on a chinlock and we take a break.
Back with Mickie chasing Serena around, only to allow Storm to plant Magnus with a Backstabber. Storm throws his sweat on Mickie and puts Magnus in a quickly broken chinlock. Magnus can’t get anything going though as he charges into Closing Time (Codebreaker) to keep him in trouble. Josh thinks it’s a gutbuster for reasons not entirely clear.
Both guys try cross bodies and it’s off to the girls with Mickie cleaning house. Everything breaks down and Storm goes after Mickie, only to get speared down for his efforts. Serena calls out Khoya, who hits Storm with the stick by mistake. Magnus adds a powerslam to Storm and the MickieDT ends Serena at 12:15.
Rating: D+. I don’t know if it’s been the boring show that led up to it but MY GOODNESS I did not care about this match. Serena could have been any warm body out there and she didn’t add much to the match. It doesn’t help that this feud basically ended a few weeks back but they dragged them out there one more time for the “blowoff”, which really didn’t do anything. Boring match which was mainly about the men while trying to be about the women.
Storm gets a MickieDT for good measure.
Mr. Anderson is worried about facing Bram because of the depths he’ll have to sink to.
Bram suggests Anderson kiss his kids goodnight and tell them goodbye because he isn’t going home.
We run down the No Surrender card.
Video on Jeff Jarrett’s career. I do get a good chuckle of TNA trying to make Jarrett seem like someone on Rock and Austin’s level, especially after they spent so much time ripping on him over the years.
Here’s Dixie Carter to induct Jarrett into the Hall of Fame. She tells a story of meeting Jeff when she lived in Tennessee and compares him to George Bailey from It’s A Wonderful Life. Dixie welcomes the Jarretts to the ring and after a break, it’s time to hear from Jeff. Jeff thanks everyone who has ever bought something from TNA and everyone who has ever worked for TNA. He leaves off people who have done work for them but haven’t actually gotten paid but I’m sure they’re included too.
Jeff lists off a bunch of production guys and office workers in what felt like something special. Mike Tenay gets thanked for holding things in place when they fell apart at times. “Don West not so much.” Then you have the X-Division, Knockouts and tag teams who all work so hard and prove that it can be more than just heavyweights main eventing. The heavyweights get a thank you as well, including AJ Styles.
Jarrett talks about a falling out with his dad (a legendary promoter in his own right) over this company but thanks him so much for getting him here. His children are the reason he’s here and even though they drive him crazy, they keep him going. Last but not least in family is Jeff’s wife Karen, who has been Jeff’s rock. A quick thank you to the fans leads to a THANK YOU JEFF chant and the roster (like 15 people) come out to applaud as the show ends. This was a nice ceremony and speech, but it felt really rushed because of the lack of time.
Overall Rating: F+. This was awful. With under twenty minutes combined of actual wrestling (if you count the commercial in the tag as ring time they crack it by less than ten seconds) and a bunch of last second building to a “special” that was announced tonight, what was the point of this show? To show that Jarrett is still a big deal? They did that already with all the packages and Slammiversary main event.
This show felt like it went on forever and built up nothing interesting. No Surrender feels like a show that is there to pop a rating, which TNA has kind of almost sort of done what, once or twice ever? I really didn’t care for this show and I didn’t want to sit through the rest of it, but that’s all we get these days in TNA. The wheels are falling off and the TV is getting worse and worse every single week. GFW getting here is supposed to be their saving grace, but TNA is barely worth saving at this point.
Results
Eric Young b. Sgt. Chris Melendez – Piledriver
Brooke b. Marti Belle – Butterface Maker
Mickie James/Magnus b. James Storm/Serena – MickieDT to Serena
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Impact Wrestling – July 15, 2015: The Champ Has A Point
Impact Wrestling Date: July 15, 2015
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: D’Angelo Dinero, Josh Matthews
There isn’t much to go off from last week, but the big story is the reveal of the new authority figure, hand picked by Dixie Carter to keep her nephew and World Champion Ethan Carter III in line from letting all the power going to his head. Something tells me this won’t be the most thrilling announcement (because there isn’t a thrilling announcement out there) but maybe it’s better than I’m expecting. Let’s get to it.
The opening recap focuses on Ethan defending his title three times last week, followed by Dixie coming out and saying she doesn’t want the power to go to his head like it went to hers, because the segment was all about Dixie.
Dixie is in the ring to start things off with the roster on the outside. At least I don’t have to hear that stupid song all the way through again. She takes responsibility for the actions that led to her being put through a table last year and she’s sorry for what happened. It was a good thing when she went through a table and broke her back because it gave her a new perspective.
Dixie appreciates what the people in the ring go through and she’s sorry for everything she’s done. It’s time for a new chapter in TNA and she needs them to be a team. This feels more and more like a speech when there’s bad news than a promo. Ethan and Tyrus come out to protest but Dixie introduces Bully Ray as the new authority figure. Yeah that guy who tried to put your company out of business and the man who screwed you over at Lockdown a year and a half ago is a GREAT pick for your new boss. That’s of course forgetting the whole driving her through a table and breaking her back part.
Ray shakes everyone’s hand and starts talking about getting a call from Dixie, where she apologized for everything and said she wanted to do it right. Bully says he understood what she said and believed it, so today he’s back in front of real wrestling fans and the best wrestlers in the world. However, he’s back for the people around the ring, who he wants up on the apron right now.
Every single one of them is here to make this the best show around, no matter what Dixie has done to them. So that brings Bully to a decision, but it’s going to be the fans making the decision. The fans agree, so Ray thinks we should have a battle royal for the #1 contendership, which starts now.
So yeah, this was all about Dixie. I have no idea why I would want to care about her big redemption story, but this boils down to one thing: Dixie doesn’t seem to be a regular character again and that’s a good thing. Ignoring the lack of logic or proper storytelling and another heel champion vs. face authority figure story, and you have something good coming out of this. The promos were acceptable enough, but this isn’t going to set the world on fire, which is so often the case in TNA.
Battle Royal
Abyss, Austin Aries, Bram, Chris Melendez, Crazzy Steve, Drew Galloway, Eric Young, Hernandez, James Storm, Jesse Godderz, Kenny King, Khoya, Magnus, Mandrews, Manik, Mica, MVP, Norv Fernum, Robbie E., Shark Boy
This is joined in progress after the break and the winner gets a World Title shot tonight. Storm hides on the apron as Fernum is eliminated. Steve is put out as well with Mandrews quickly following him to the floor. There goes Shark Boy with Manik following. There isn’t much to talk about here, just like in most battle royals.
Magnus clotheslines Abyss out to almost no reaction, meaning Josh can plug the season finale of Barbecue Pit Masters. Melendez is out as the ring is clearing out a bit. Storm and Magnus are put out as we take a break. The lack of caring about two former World Champions being eliminated is striking.
We take a break and come back with only MVP, Galloway and Young remaining, meaning about twelve people were eliminated during the break. Drew gets double teamed for a bit until Young gets smart by eliminating MVP from behind. Eric loads up the piledriver but Drew reverses and kicks him in the chest for the win at 11:00. Josh: “Is Drew Galloway just one win away from being World Heavyweight Champion?” Well that’s how being #1 contender normally works.
Rating: F. Over half of the eliminations were during the break, which is almost guaranteed to be due to the Hernandez issue. The match was another boring battle royal anyway with very little of interest, but a lot of that was due to the people being thrown out off camera. Galloway winning is interesting though and should make him a main event guy, but instead it’s likely going to be a one off match on a one off show because TNA has made their new star for now with Carter.
Sting Hall of Fame video. This year’s inductee is announced next week.
Mr. Anderson talks about being 39 and not needing to risk an injury at the hands of someone like Bram, who doesn’t even care about his own well being. Anderson knows he can get to the dark places Bram likes to stay, but he doesn’t know if he wants to. This was more emotion than Anderson has shown in a long time and I liked it.
A depressed Rockstar Spud comes up to Bully in the back and isn’t sure what to do now. Ray asks him if he’s depressed about losing to Kurt Angle. Ray: “WE’VE ALL LOST TO KURT ANGLE!” Spud gets an X-Division Title shot in five minutes and Ray gets an unwanted hug.
Kurt Angle Hall of Fame video.
Eli Drake congratulates Drew on winning the battle royal. And of course Drake would never stab him in the back and cost him the shot right?
Before the X-Division Title match, here are some comments from Donald Trump on Mexicans, which Tigre Uno will respond to next week.
X-Division Title: Tigre Uno vs. DJZ vs. Rockstar Spud vs. Grado
Tigre is defending in yet another multi-man title match. I can barely remember the last one on one title shot for the belt. Grado uses the power of fat to control early on, prompting him to try to start a BELLY chant. No one can lift Grado either but he finally misses a backsplash so everyone can dropkick him down. That goes nowhere as Grado gets back up and hooks a neckbreaker for two on the champ. This isn’t the most interesting match in the world so far and it’s showing badly.
Grado and Spud take turns punching DJZ in the head but Grado keeps spending too much time winding up before finally elbowing him down. The two of them start fighting until Tigre springboards in with a dropkick, followed by one of the worst misses I’ve ever seen as Tigre’s Phoenix splash barely grazes Grado’s leg (he held his knee) but still gets the pin to retain at 4:05.
Rating: D. So let’s see: Grado is a fat guy who isn’t all that fat and does at least have charisma, has a gimmick that no one can slam him but he has a cult following. That leaves DJZ and Spud who are just kind of there, plus Tigre who had a horribly missed splash to end this wreck. No story, no real characters and no real reason for this to be happening. Well done TNA: you’ve killed what made people care about you.
Taryn promises to beat Brooke tonight as only the Dollhouse can.
Knockouts Title: Taryn Terrell vs. Brooke
Taryn is defending and chokes in the corner to start as Dinero thinks Terrell is the better Knockout because of her attire, despite it pretty much being the same as Brooke’s. Brooke comes back with a forearm but the Dollhouse pulls her to the floor for a beating. Another comeback is stopped with an elbow in the jaw, followed by another Dollhouse distraction to keep the champ in control.
A high cross body gets a pair of twos on Brooke. Taryn misses what looked to be a middle rope dropkick, allowing Brooke to make her third comeback in about six minutes. Some forearms connect but the Dollhouse interferes AGAIN to stop another comeback. There go the lights and here’s Gail Kim to run interference, allowing Brooke to hit a horribly botched Butterface Maker for the pin and the title at 7:35.
Rating: D-. After hearing Josh talk about the longest reign ever and all that jazz, it’s the female Billy Gunn getting the title? Brooke is one of the worst possible options for the title, but it’s becoming clearer and clearer that the division needs some fresh blood. Why is that always the case and why is it always the same batch fighting over the title?
Kurt Angle has given Bully Ray a great idea.
Here’s Angle to praise Ethan Carter III for being as talented as he is. Angle has no problem with the loss, but he has a problem with the way he lost the rematch. That’s why Angle went to Bully Ray with an idea: the rematch never took place, meaning there’s another rematch. However, that’s not going to be anytime soon because Angle has a tumor in his neck and is going to be out for a while.
Angle is ready to go but here’s Eric Young to interrupt. Young takes credit for the neck injury because of all the piledrivers over the last few weeks. Eric wants to be the one to put Angle out and goes all angry with some punches to trigger a brawl. Chris Melendez makes the save to break up a piledriver on the floor, only to take it himself instead. Josh is AGHAST that a Canadian doesn’t care about an American war hero.
Team 3D Hall of Fame video.
Due to Hernandez having to be edited out, here’s TNA’s replacement, from Slammiversary 2015. The clipped version airs here but this is the full review.
James Storm vs. Magnus
Unsanctioned so anything goes. They slug it out at ringside to start before heading into the crowd with Magnus taking over. Storm slams him through a table of food and grabs a beer bottle but stops to spit on the announcers, allowing Magnus to come back with right hands. They get back inside with a table being set up but Storm hits him low.
Magnus doesn’t seem to mind as he catapults Storm’s face into the bottom of the table for a unique spot. It’s off to the back of the arena again as a production guy repeatedly tells them that there’s high voltage back there. Magnus is thrown into a box and the video screen goes to a test pattern. That goes nowhere so they head back to the ring with the Eye of the Storm being countered into a powerbomb through the table for two.
Storm comes back with an Orton hanging DDT but stops to set up another table on the floor. Instead of putting Magnus through the table though, Storm yells at Earl Hebner, allowing Magnus to make a comeback. Magnus misses a top rope elbow through the table and crashes onto the concrete. That’s only good for two of course so Storm pulls out some powder.
Magnus comes back for like the tenth time but the powder goes into Earl’s eyes, meaning there’s no count off the Spine Shaker. Instead the Last Call gets two so it’s cowbell time, but Magnus hits another Spine Shaker for two. END THIS ALREADY! Now the cowbell connects and another Last Call gets another two.
Storm sets up two chairs with a piece of barricade bridged between. Magnus superplexes him through the barricade and, say it with me, it gets two. Both guys get bottles and connect at the same time with Storm falling on top for the pin (despite Magnus being on the barricade and therefore his shoulders not being on the mat) at 16:38.
Rating: C+. The match was trying but they went WAY too far and long out there as it was almost a copy of the Rusev vs. Cena match at Payback. Yeah they beat each other up a lot but I lost interest about halfway through. This felt like it was about four matches packed into one, but at least it was a fun brawl. The start was pretty lame though as they were just kind of walking around and trying to figure out what to do.
We see Storm’s promo on Magnus from after Slammiversary where Storm said he could find a woman to stand beside him against Mickie and Magnus.
Storm says there’s always room for one more in the Revolution. The partner will be someone very, very close to Mickie. Whoever it is calls Storm and he walks off to talk to her.
Carter and Tyrus come to see Ray (Ray: “I’ve got to get a door.”) because Ethan fought three times last week. Therefore, shouldn’t we postpone the match with Galloway for another week? Ray loves the input but shoots it down in less than a second. Carter needs to start acting like a champion.
TNA World Title: Ethan Carter III vs. Drew Galloway
Carter is defending of course. Feeling out process to start with Drew hitting a shoulder for little advantage. Some chops have Carter in a bit more trouble and chops against the barricade make it even worse. Cue the Tyrus interference though, drawing out Eli Drake (still on crutches) to even things up as we take a break.
Back with the champ in control and slapping on a chinlock. Carter’s chest is blood red from those chops. Drew fights up so Ethan grabs a front facelock but trips Drew’s leg for something like a reverse DDT. Not the most effective looking move in the world but at least it was different. A slap to the face just fires Drew up though and a top rope clothesline gets two. There’s a powerslam for the same with Drake cutting Tyrus off from making the save.
White Noise gets two more but this time Tyrus is able to get Carter onto the ropes. Back up and Galloway no sells some chops, only to have his elbow hit the referee in the face. Carter hits him low but here’s Drake to turn on Galloway anyway. Totally shocking swerve of course. Drake leaves and the 1%er retains the title at 14:20.
Rating: D+. Not bad but it’s clear that Carter can only do so much in the ring. That being said, it fits his character perfectly as he’s getting close to channeling the Honky Tonk Man mantra of “sometimes it’s better to be lucky than good.” The match wasn’t horrible but as Carter said earlier: if this is supposed to be a big match, shouldn’t there be more than about an hour and a half to build it up?
Overall Rating: D. This was one of their weaker episodes in a long time. Between the two horribly botched endings and the Slammiversary match eating up a lot of time, there really wasn’t anything to see here. Drew vs. Ethan could have been something interesting but instead it’s a one off match on a nothing show to set up Galloway vs. Drake, which should at least be entertaining. This really didn’t work with lame wrestling and very little set up for the future outside of Ray as the new authority figure. It could have been a lot worse, but this was a bad show.
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of NXT Reviews: The Full Sail Years Volume I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:
Impact Wrestling Moving Back To Wednesdays Starting June 3
According to Dixie, though I’m sure you all know this as EVERYONE follows her on Twitter right? I’d much rather have three hours to do on Wednesdays (counting NXT) and have Friday night off. There’s no way around the Friday night death slot, though I’m always curious to see TNA diehards’ latest explanation for why the ratings still aren’t great.
Wrestling Wars Podcast #3
The show gets WAY more streamlined this week as we have our first pay per view preview with a look at Extreme Rules 2015, complete with a little fantasy booking, Dixie Carter’s face on chocolates and of course a fire on a life raft. Come check us out as we run down the post Wrestlemania pay per view offering.
Also keep in mind that we’ll be back with an Extreme Rules fallout show the same night.
Let me know what you think.
KB
Impact Wrestling – December 24, 2014: Business As Usual
Impact Wrestling Date: December 24, 2014
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz, Don West
Hosts: Christy Hemme, Jeremy Borash
This is the final episode of Impact Wrestling on SpikeTV before they head over to Destination America early in the new year. It’s also the second half of the Top Twenty Moments countdown, which hopefully is capped off by someone who still works for this company. Let’s get to it.
#10. Impact – February 19, 2009
Kurt Angle vs. Sting
Empty arena match for control of the Main Event Mafia. With no one there, of course they come out to their music. Sting throws Angle outside to start and they hit that wall that they always hit in brawls. Angle goes nuts with right hands and you can hear the grunting. They go up into the empty seats as this is one of those “let’s walk around and not really do much” matches. Angle walks him back up into the seats and somehow the cameras can’t follow them, despite there being no one to get around.
Sting dumps Angle over a balcony but Kurt comes back with a metal trashcan. Kurt: “I HATE YOU!” We see some fans watching in the concourse as I realize there’s no reason given for this to be an empty arena match. A low blow puts Sting down and Angle swears a bit. Sting pops up with a chair to the back but Angle begs off a beating from a chair. He swears that he’s sorry and says he has kids, only to change his mind and tell Sting to hit him. Nash and Steiner finally come in to break it up with Nash shouting to MAKE IT RIGHT. They shake hands but start fighting again, shouting how much they hate each other.
Rating: D-. Again, why was this an empty arena match? It didn’t make a ton of sense when it was Rock vs. Mankind and it really doesn’t make a ton of sense here. As usual, it felt like Russo trying to do something to make a splash instead of making sense, which is eventually going to be exposed for the shock TV that it is.
#9. Impact – October 8, 2014.
Tag Team Titles: Hardys vs. Team 3D vs. Wolves
The Wolves are defending and this is Full Metal Mayhem, meaning TLC. Richards has a somewhat bad leg coming into this but he seems to be fine. It’s a big brawl to start of course with Matt hitting what looked like the Side Effect to Eddie on the apron. Bully hammers on Jeff on the floor as weapons are being sets up on the floor. Matt goes for a climb but Ray comes in for a save with a Rock Bottom.
Davey breaks up Ray’s attempt and DDTs him, only to have D-Von nail Richards a second later. Matt gets enziguried into a German suplex onto a pair of open chairs. Eddie throws Jeff into the air and Ray catches him in a Cutter for a 3D. They chop it out but Matt is back up to take both guys down. We get the Tower of Doom with Ray electric chairing Matt who superplexes Edwards. D-Von bridges a piece of barricade between the apron and some overturned steps but Davey headbutts him onto the barricade.
Ray saves his partner from a dive and powerbombs Richards down, only to miss a middle rope backsplash. He comes right back with another powerbomb to send Richards onto the barricade, giving Richards one of the most shocked looks I’ve ever seen. Back with Jeff taking a ladder to the face and D-Von cleans house with a chair.
Richards comes back with a chair of his own but this time it’s Jeff popping up to take over. The Whisper in the Wind and Swanton have Ray in trouble but he pops right back up for a brawl with Jeff on the floor. The Twisting Stunner has Ray in trouble and Jeff brings out another table. He bridges it between the turned over steps and the apron with the legs up. Jeff misses the legdrop though and crashes through the table, leaving him in a huge heap on the floor.
Back in and Ray goes up, only to have Edwards set up a ladder of his own next to it. Bully kicks him down but Matt comes in with a ladder of his own. All three go up and slug it out with Edwards getting slammed off the top. Mat and Ray grab for the belts but send them swinging around before knocking each other off with Matt flying into a ladder.
Davey and Matt slug it out with Hardy getting the better of it and bringing in another table. Everyone heads outside again with Matt climbing about halfway up a huge ladder to legdrop Davey through a table. Richards has taken one heck of a beating here. D-Von cleans house with the ladder and brings in the big ladder to make thing even more fun. Team 3D loads up What’s Up but Edwards shoves D-Von to the floor.
Davey goes up the big ladder but gets shoved onto the floor and head first into the barricade. The Hardys make another save with chairs and put Ray on two tables. Jeff goes up top of the big ladder but Davey shoves it over, sending Hardy into a HUGE splash onto Ray for a horrible looking crash. Davey and Matt slug it out on top of the ladder but Edwards makes a save and powerbombs Matt through a table, allowing Davey to take down the belts for the win at 23:52.
Rating: A. I came into this show thinking this match wasn’t going to be able to live up to its hype and they got me. This was an AWESOME match with a ton of high spots and some insane looking bumps. The fact that they didn’t save this for Bound For Glory shows you just how much they don’t care about that show this year. Excellent match and one of the best things TNA has done in years.
#8. Slammiversary 2013.
Taryn Terrell vs. Gail Kim
Last Knockout standing. Gail attacks in the corner to start but Taryn comes back with clotheslines to take over. Gail puts on an octopus hold but lets it go early and only gets a six count. Kim goes to the floor for a chair but has it kicked out of her hands. Some hair drags keep Gail down for a few moments but she manages to get the chair up to block a high cross body. Gail is up first and goes after the knee for a bit before wedging the chair between the ropes. Taryn blocks a ram into the chair but gets caught in the Figure Four around the post.
Terrell is up at 8 and dodges Gail’s charge into the corner, sending her head first into the chair in a SICK looking crash. That only gets eight so Taryn puts her in the Figure Four around the post for eight more. Taryn misses a charge and lands on the ramp for nine, only to be caught in a legsweep onto the ramp for nine more. Gail tries a piledriver but gets reversed into a bulldog off the ramp to put both girls down. Taryn beats the count for the win at 9:18.
Rating: B-. This was the best Knockouts match in YEARS. The bulldog off the stage was a bigger spot but the missed charge into the chair should have been the finish. It looked MUCH more painful and I thought Gail was out cold. Still though, very entertaining match and I was really impressed with Taryn here. I’d bet on her vs. Mickie at BFG for the title in a veteran vs. underdog title match.
#7. Impact – January 4, 2010.
It’s 9pm so here’s Hulk in black. Brooke is of course in the front row. Hogan immediately puts over the roster and the locker room for working as hard as they have. Now we get the infamous line from this promo: “I’ve been in the back all day.” Remember that this is after AN HOUR OF WATCHING HIM DRIVE TO THE BUILDING. That line was edited out of the rebroadcast of the show and it’s painful to hear all over again.
Hogan talks about how many new and familiar faces there are here. As he’s talking, Hall and Waltman try to get to the ring. Hogan says give them a mic and let them get in the ring. Hall and Hogan do the Wolfpack sign and Hall says the party is back. The boss tells him that’s not how it works anymore. Waltman thinks it’s the same people so it’s the same party, but Hogan shoots him down too. In a laughable line, Hogan says it’s time to grow up.
Hall says everything is changing, with or without Hogan. Wait so is everything changing or is everything the same? Nash comes out and wants to know what’s going on, but Hulk insists he’s not playing a role. Hogan says they need to do this FOR REAL because it’s a different time. Hall and Waltman are ready to fight but Eric Bischoff debuts and says they reinvented this business. Dixie Carter is shown watching from the crowd.
Bischoff says this is all about communication and that has broken down recently. Everyone has to earn their position in this company, which Nash hears loud and clear. Nash, Hall and Waltman leave and Bischoff again claims that they can change the business again. Hogan says they’ve shuffled the deck as Dixie cautiously applauds. Bischoff rips up the format sheet to show how different things are going to be. He hands the producer a new format because they’re turning this company upside down. So this basically boiled down to the same “this is new” promo that every indy company starts with.
In storyline development, Shera makes it to the top of a hill where Sotrm is waiting with a jug of water. Storm pours it on top of him and welcomes Shera to the Revolution.
#6. Impact – January 9, 2014.
TNA World Title: AJ Styles vs. Magnus
No DQ and both guys are champion coming in. Magnus immediately goes to the floor and does it again for a second time in less than ninety seconds. No contact yet. Magnus gets back in but here are Ethan Carter and Spud to jump AJ before any contact is made. AJ fights them off and superkicks Magnus in the ribs but Carter breaks up a Styles Clash attempt. Sting finally comes out for the save but doesn’t do anything as AJ saves himself. Magnus bails to the floor and we take a break.
Back with the two champions still not making contact as the Bro Mans and Zema Ion come out to jump Sting and AJ and giving us six run-ins in less than eight minutes. Zema DDTs AJ and the Bro Down gets a delayed two on Styles. Sting comes back in as Magnus just chills at ringside. The Brit finally comes back in and AJ quickly loads up the Clash, only to have Bad Influence make the save and lay him out with a powerbomb/neckbreaker combo.
Earl Hebner refuses to count so Dixie and Brian Hebner get us to ELEVEN people coming out for this match. Bad Influence goes High/Low on AJ for two and Brian gets yelled at. Sting lays out the Bro Mans with a double Death Drop on the floor before putting Ion in the Deathlock. AJ fights back against Bad Influence as Sting comes in to help even more. We’re down to Magnus vs. AJ with Styles getting the Calf Killer, only to have Kazarian take out the referee.
Kazarian monkey flips AJ into Daniels but AJ clotheslines him down and Peles Kaz. Now the Styles Clash takes out Magnus but there’s no referee. Earl Hebner hobbles back out (we’ll call that #12) to count two before AJ dives over the top to take out Bad Influence yet again. AJ goes up top but Bobby Roode makes it #13 by shoving Styles into the ropes. Three AA/DVDs lay AJ out for about the fifth time, giving Magnus the pin (thanks to referee #3 and the fourteenth person added to the match) and the undisputed title at 15:47. Sting was being held back by most of the heels in case you were wondering.
Rating: D. So they spent all night hyping up the match before going full Russo on it. That’s what we spent months and months building to? The match was definitely energetic but we really had to spend all this time setting up Dixie with her corporate champion? Assuming AJ leaving isn’t a HUGE swerve, this was one of the biggest wastes of time I can remember in years.
#5. Impact Wrestling – January 17, 2013.
Are they kidding???
It’s wedding time. Ray is in a tux which is weird to say the least. The groomsmen come out with the bridesmaids (looking GOOD tonight) and here’s Brooke. Hulk finally comes out (setting a record in getting into a tuxedo) to a big ovation. The fans tell Hulk to shake Bully’s hand. They get through a LONG intro from the minister and saying how much they care about each other.
No one objects, they both say I do, and Tazz takes the mic from the minister. Tazz asks if Bully is sure, then says it’s too hot in here. He takes off his jacket, and reveals an Aces and 8’s vest. The big brawl ends the ceremony and show. Brooke gets kidnapped again as Ray takes a pedestal to the face to end the show.
So quick recap here. There are four moments left and we have the following to go off the top of my head:
Kurt Angle debuts
AJ Styles wins the World Title at No Surrender 2009
Unbreakable triple threat
Elix Skipper walks the cage
Angle vs. Joe from Genesis 2006
ANYTHING from before October 2007
Somehow they’re going to screw up something as simple as “hey, does anyone remember any great matches from the last twelve years?”
#4. Impact – November 3, 2011.
TNA World Title: James Storm vs. Bobby Roode
Feeling out process to start as they’re playing up the idea that they know each other very well. Off to a test of strength which doesn’t last long. Neither guy has an advantage as we go to a break. Back with Storm ramming shoulders into Roode in the corner. They keep countering each other and Roode can’t get much of an advantage. Storm stays ahead with a superplex but both guys are down.
They slug it out and Storm takes over with some running shots. Blockbuster gets two for Roode. Backstabber gets two for the champ. Eye of the Storm is countered into a spinebuster for two. They head to the floor and both guys barely get back inside in time. Storm tries an Orton DDT but gets countered into a Crossface. Storm makes a rope and Roode is frustrated. Roode tries a superplex but Storm counters into a top rope elbow for two.
This is getting good. Last Call misses as Roode grabs the fisherman’s suplex. Storm counters that and is almost sent into the referee. The referee avoids the contact but twists his knee in the process as Roode is sent to the floor. Roode succumbs to the demons inside and grabs the beer bottle which he breaks over Storm’s head to BIG heat. It gives him the world title at 17:40.
Rating: B. This was a very solid match that could have easily main evented a PPV with about five minutes extra. Still though, good stuff here and that’s what they needed to do. I’m really not sure I like the ending but it’s TNA after all so how good can it get? The heel turn was needed, but Roode is going to have to step up his emotions as a heel to deserve this spot. Good match though.
#3. Unbreakable
X-Division Title: Samoa Joe vs. AJ Styles vs. Christopher Daniels
Daniels is the longest reigning champion ever at this point, AJ is a four time champion and Joe is undefeated. This is TNA’s greatest match ever so let’s see if it holds up. AJ and Joe team up to beat down Daniels to start which is kind of a surprising move. Joe kicks him HARD in the back and AJ does the same thing. It turns into a contest and I think Joe wins by a hair. Daniels gets up but Joe kicks him in the face. Cool sequence.
AJ grabs a fast rollup on Joe and we’re ready to get going. They trade pinfall attempts so fast that I can’t type them until Joe hooks a modified Rings of Saturn. Daniels breaks it up and kicks AJ down for no cover. Joe chops the champ and hits a standing enziguri to knock him to the floor. AJ takes Joe down but Daniels is back in to take over on Styles, getting two. Joe chops them both in the corner but Daniels fires back with chops of his own.
Styles headscissors both guys down into opposite corners and fires off kicks at Joe. Joe is like screw that and suplexes him down overhead style. There’s the Facewash to Styles but Daniels breaks up the running kick to the face. Daniels hits a springboard moonsault onto Joe on the floor but you know AJ has to top him, so he hits a springboard shooting star to take both guys down. He rolls Joe back in for two and things slow down a tiny bit.
Actually scratch that as Styles hits the drop down/dropkick combo for two. Daniels comes back in again and monkey flips AJ at Joe but AJ twists in mid air into a rana on the fat man. Daniels O’Connor rolls Styles for two and then launches him over the top and out to the floor. A flying knee sends Joe into the corner and Daniels slaps him in the face. Joe will have none of that and slaps Daniels back but Daniels rolls him up for two.
Joe counters the rollup into the Clutch so Styles busts out Spiral Tap to break up the hold. That gets two on both guys and Daniels sends Styles back to the floor. An STO puts Joe down but AJ breaks up the BME. I feel like I’m talking to a 3 year old after that last exchange with all the spelling. Daniels gets caught in the Tree of Woe and AJ kicks away, but Joe splashes AJ into Daniels. A running dropkick to the face breaks the Tree and Daniels is out.
The running big boot that Joe does knocks AJ’s head into Tallahassee somewhere and the backsplash gets two. Daniels comes back out of nowhere and hits the Death Valley Driver on Joe. Everyone is down until Daniels covers Joe for two. AJ gets sent to the floor and both he and Daniels miss moonsaults. They slug it out so Joe hits a corkscrew plancha to take both guys down. The fans are losing their minds over this stuff. Back in and Daniels breaks up the MuscleBuster but Styles goes up too. AJ and Daniels fight on the top so Joe backdrops both of them down at the same time.
Joe gets up first and he looks MAD. He and AJ slug it out with AJ taking over but Joe slugs him right back and hits a big old German release suplex to take over. There’s the MuscleBuster but Daniels comes in with the belt. He charges at Joe but the Samoan hits a snap powerslam to cut that off. Joe picks the belt up but Daniels kicks it into his face. Daniels and AJ slug it out and that just feels appropriate. A blue thunder bomb out of nowhere gets two on Styles.
Release Rock Bottom puts AJ down and the BME gets two as Joe makes the save. Daniels puts a Dragon Sleeper on Joe and hooks the Last Rites (rolling cutter which he didn’t use that often) to send Joe to the floor again. AJ bounces back up and hits the moonsault into the reverse DDT for two. Styles goes up but Daniels hits a palm strike to stop him. Daniels superplexes him down but he can’t cover. Joe comes in and covers both guys for two.
Joe focuses on Daniels and hits his powerbomb into the Boston Crab into the STF sequence so he can call a LONG spot to Daniels. Daniels (wearing a wedding ring) gets the rope so Joe beats up AJ a bit more. He fires off forearms but AJ snaps off the Pele to take over again. The Rack into a neckbreaker gets two for Styles but Daniels is back up. AJ hits a sunset flip into the Clash but Joe makes the save at two. Daniels ducks a charging Joe to send him tot he floor. AJ and Daniels slug it out and Daniels tries the Angel’s Wings. AJ counters into a bridging backdrop and stays on top for the pin and the title.
Rating: A+. Yeah that’s the easy answer but there’s no real other option to go with here. This was about twenty three minutes long and the longest they go without action is maybe 20 seconds. These three have incredible chemistry together and it was a great example of what smaller guys can do. It’s not the best match in TNA history by a mile but it’s the best match by a few feet. Great match.
#2. Bound For Glory 2010.
TNA World Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Kurt Angle vs. Mr. Anderson
Anderson beat D’Angelo Dinero and Hardy and Angle went to a time limit draw, forcing the three way. Hardy debuts new music which should tell you a lot. Anderson gets double teamed to start but Kurt is sent out to the floor. Angle comes back in and throws Jeff to the floor so he can kick at Anderson’s knee in the corner. A release overhead belly to belly gets two on Mr. with Hardy making a save. Jeff gets back into it and picks up Anderson, so Angle Germans both guys at the same time.
Anderson goes outside for the first time but Jeff backdrops Angle up and over the top for a bad landing. Thankfully he’s ok enough to pull Anderson out to the floor for a brawl, but Hardy dives over the top to put everyone down. Back in and Kurt puts Anderson in a chinlock until Jeff makes a save. He goes up top very slowly though, allowing Angle to run the corner for the belly to belly. Jeff pops back up, only to miss the Swanton on Anderson and give Kurt a near fall. Dixie Carter is watching at ringside.
Angle loads up a superplex but Andeson turns it into a Tower of Doom for two on both guys. It’s Angle up first to roll some Germans on Anderson before doing the same on Hardy. He wants to keep things together so there’s an ankle lock to both guys at the same time. Angle goes up top but Anderson’s ankle is fine enough for the rolling fireman’s carry for two. Hardy breaks it up with a Swanton for two on both guys.
Back up and Anderson goes up, only to get caught in a belly to back superplex to give Kurt a near fall. Whisper in the Wind puts Angle down and there’s a Twist of Fate to Anderson. The Swanton crushes Mr. but Angle grabs Jeff’s ankle. Anderson breaks it up with the Mic Check for two on Kurt and everyone gets two off a rollup. Kurt actually hits the moonsault for two on Hardy, who falls out of the ring. Angle escapes the Mic Check but accidentally clotheslines the referee. Everyone knows the big THEY reveal is coming.
Anderson hits the Mic Check on Angle but can’t follow up. This brings out Eric Bischoff with a chair but Hogan comes out (I’m as shocked as you are) before he can swing it. Hulk is on crutches and moving pretty slowly as we have to wait even longer. Bischoff throws the chair down but takes away a crutch. Hardy gets back in to calm things down but Hogan hands him his crutch.
Jeff squares off with Bischoff….and breaks the crutch over Angle’s back. Hogan smiles and Bischoff says that was awesome. Hogan points at Hardy and hugs Eric as they watch Hardy break the other crutch over Anderson’s back. The Twist of Fate is enough to pin Anderson and give Hardy the title.
Rating: B-. The match is good but this was ALL about the booking and big swerve at the end. Hogan and Bischoff weren’t really surprises so it was all down to who was going to side with the new mega heel faction. Hardy winning the title is fine and the best option given who was in there.
Bischoff introduces Jeff as the new World Champion and a smiling Jeff Jarrett comes out. Abyss follows them out and hugs Hogan. Fans throw trash in the ring ala the NWO debut (there were rumors this was planted) as RVD comes out to ask Jeff what he’s doing. Hardy lays him out with a belt shot and poses with THEY to end the show.
Quick recap of the top ten.
And now, I kid you not, this is considered the #1 moment all time in TNA wrestling history.
#1. Impact – August 7, 2014
Here’s all of Dixie’s team but she fires Stephens and Snitsky like the maniac she is. Cue Team 3D and Dreamer with a table but Dixie hides behind everyone she’s paid off. Ray promises to put Dixie through a table and Dreamer says Dixie is everything that’s wrong with this business. Mo nails Dreamer and the brawl is on with the ECW guys taking over. Suddenly Dixie is alone in the ring with 3D but runs when she’s about to take 3D.
Spud swears it’s never going to happen but the entire locker room comes out to throw Dixie to the wolves (Team 3D, not Richards/Edwards). D-Von loads her up (and grabs her in a rather personal spot) and Bully powerbombs Dixie off the middle rope through the table, in what I believe was Dixie’s first bump ever. We even get Bully’s old euphoric look and the announcers are WAY too happy to see this.
I’m not sure how I feel about this. I have no problem with a heel, male or female, taking a big bump to end a story. What I’m not wild on is how everything was announced in advance. This is going to cause some issues in the mainstream media given how violent it was, but that’s the nature of pro wrestling. It felt very scripted though and that’s not a good thing, but the ending was exactly what it should have been.
Here’s the entire top 20 in case you didn’t catch last week.
20. Angle vs. Joe – Lockdown 2008
19. Aries vs. Roode – Destination X 2012
18. Motor City Machine Guns vs. Beer Money – Victory Road 2010
17. WOO Off – Impact – July 7, 2010
16. Ultimate X – Bound For Glory 2009
15. Bully Ray vs. Jeff Hardy – Lockdown 2013
14. Knockouts Title Gauntlet Match – Bound For Glory 2007
13. Karen Angle marries Jeff Jarrett – Impact – March 3, 2011
12. Lashley vs. Roode II – October 29, 2014
11. Sting vs. Hogan – Bound For Glory 2011
10. Sting vs. Angle – Impact – February 19, 2009 (Empty Arena Match)
9. Impact – October 8, 2014 – Team 3D vs. Wolves vs. Hardys (Full Metal Mayhem)
8. Gail Kim vs. Taryn Terrell – Slammiversary 2013 (Last Knockout Standing)
7. Hogan and Bischoff Debut – Impact – January 4, 2010
6. AJ Styles vs. Magnus – Impact – January 9, 2014
5. Bully Ray marries Brooke Hogan – Impact Wrestling – January 17, 2013
4. James Storm vs. Bobby Roode – Impact – November 3, 2011
3. Styles vs. Joe vs. Daniels – Unbreakable
2. Jeff Hardy vs. Kurt Angle vs. Mr. Anderson – Bound For Glory 2010
1. Dixie Carter Goes Through A Table – Impact – August 7, 2014
Overall Rating: C-. I’m just talking about the top ten this week. While last week’s had some funny moments that felt more like honorable mentions than anything else, this week had some incredibly bizarre picks. First off though, let’s knock out the ones that make sense and that I have no issue with. #9 is fine and was pretty easily one of TNA’s best matches of the year. #8 might be the best Knockouts match ever. #7 is indeed huge for TNA. #4, #3 and #2 are all fine either for importance, quality and hype respectfully.
Then on the other side, what in the world is the empty arena match doing on here? Yeah it’s Sting vs. Angle, but those two headlined Bound For Glory together and traded the World Title. Instead though we get probably their least memorable match ever which is only there because it had a lame gimmick attacked. What an odd choice that sounds like someone saw the names on a page and picked the match without looking. #6….eh yeah it was a big moment but it didn’t lead anywhere and is FAR too high up. #5 is a joke.
That leaves us with #1. Yeah it’s a big moment, but the top moment in the history of the company? Really? Not signing Kurt Angle five months after he was defending the World Title at Wrestlemania? Not Elix Skipper walking the cage in an outstanding match that was on every TNA highlight reel until Hogan and Bischoff rebooted the company? On top of that, nothing from Raven’s great run back in 2003? Abyss’ only mention is a cameo at the end of Bound For Glory 2010? He had a great match against Styles at Lockdown 2005, but apparently only Unbreakable happened in the first five years of TNA history.
Overall this list feels like it was thrown together by a slightly more than casual fan of TNA. Some of these are obvious, but for the most part this comes off like a list from the last six years instead of the best ever from TNA. Having stuff in there like the two weddings or the WOO Off (funny moment, but they showed it in the package before they aired the full thing) takes up another spot that could go to something more important. It did hit some spots though including most of the important ones, save for the top one that is.
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2014 Awards – Worst Angle of the Year
Stop me if you’ve heard this one before.
Anyone who has followed me this year should be able to figure this one out.
We’ll start with the weaker ones.
Dixie Carter going through a table. The fact that TNA showed this one a week before it took place hurt me a bit, but not as much as her back hurt after the bump broke two bones in it. The problem here is it came WAY too late and I really didn’t care by the end.
Daniel Bryan cheating on Brie. Thankfully this lasted like five days before they just pulled the plug on Claire Lynch Mach II.
Batista is a face. Seriously, that might be the biggest bomb of the year. See what I did there?
That leaves us with the thing I probably complained about more than anything else all year: the freaking Bella Twins. We had to go through MONTHS of these two running their mouths, having bad matches, the NEVER ENDING PROMOS and “I’ve never told anyone about this” before they just freaking reunited like nothing ever happened because they’re sisters. On top of that there’s Nikki trying to be all serious despite being an appetizer for most of the former big name Divas. I mean, can’t you picture Trish smiling at them and then just kicking them both in the face? These two drove me crazy all year and nothing about them worked.
Bound For Glory 2013 (2014 Redo): It’s Sad In A Way
Bound For Glory 2013 Date: October 20, 2013
Location: Viejas Arena, San Diego, California
Attendance: 3,000
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz
We’ll wrap up the redos here with a show that really doesn’t feel like the biggest deal of the year. The main event is AJ Styles, who has spent most of the year channeling 1997 Sting as the loner who barely talks, challenging Aces and 8’s President Bully Ray. This doesn’t feel like as big a deal as it should due to Ray only having won the title back about two months ago following a meaningless reign by Chris Sabin. Let’s get to it.
There was a pre-show match in 2013.
Pre-Show: Gauntlet Match
This is a four team gauntlet match with the winners getting a Tag Team Title shot on the regular pay per view. We start with Bad Influence vs. Chavo Guerrero/Hernandez. Guerrero and Kaz get things going but it’s quickly off to Hernandez who hits the over the shoulder backbreaker to both guys at the same time. SuperMex heads to the ramp and gets a running start to take out Bad Influence with a huge running double clothesline.
We take a break and come back with Hernandez hitting a kind of powerbomb on Kaz for no cover. Both guys crawl over to make tags so Chavo can speed things up with shoulders to Daniels. Everything quickly breaks down and Hernandez is back up to clean house with clotheslines. Chavo hits Three Amigos on Daniels because he’s an Eddie Guerrero tribute wrestler. Speaking of Eddie, Chavo goes up for the Frog Splash but Kaz shoves him off the top to give Daniels a rollup pin.
Joseph Park and Eric Young are the third team and drop Kaz with a double back elbow. Park’s big splash gets no cover but he does slam Kaz down again. Park tries another slam but gets dropped on his head to change control. Bad Influence changes without a tag because they’re, well, bad, allowing Daniels to send Park face first into Kaz’s boot. A slingshot elbow followed by a slingshot legdrop gets two as Young teases interfering.
Kaz’s sunset flip is countered but Park only hits mat when trying to sit down. We take another break and come back with Eric getting the hot tag and cleaning house with elbows and right hands. A belly to belly gets two on Daniels but he comes back with a release Rock Bottom. He misses the BME though and Park’s Samoan drop gives Young the pin.
Before the fourth team comes out though, Kaz lays out Young with Fade to Black and send Park into the Ultimate X structure. The BroMans are the final team (due to winning a match on Impact and come out with Mr. Olympia Phil Heath. Park is carried to the back and we’re starting with a handicap match. Robbie starts for the team but it’s quickly off to Jesse for a shot to the ribs. Young comes back with a double clothesline and some right hands to both Bros. The top rope elbow gets two as Jesse makes a save and the yet to be named BroDown (Hart Attack) gives the BroMans the title shot.
Rating: C. This match got a good deal of time, running about twenty two minutes. That’s far more than you usually get in a gauntlet match and it’s really nice for a change. I always have trouble with gauntlets as most of the falls take no time, which makes me wonder why that never happens in regular matches. This was a free match so it’s hard to complain when compared to the rest of the card.
The opening video is almost all about AJ with his voiceovers talking about how tired he is of doing the right thing all the time. Now he’s back to fight for himself instead of TNA, even though it makes him the same guy he used to be when he got ticked off. One other note: Dixie Carter is now evil and has sided with Bully Ray, who is still trying to take over her company. It was around this time that people were sick of hearing from her, so of course she became a bigger and bigger focal point of TV.
Taz is now part of Aces and 8’s so we have a heel commentator.
X-Division Title: Samoa Joe vs. Manik vs. Jeff Hardy vs. Chris Sabin vs. Austin Aries
Ultimate X with Manik defending against an all-star lineup. Joe is part of the reformed Main Event Mafia which is around to fight Aces and 8’s. Sabin quickly goes to the corner but gets glared down by everyone else in the match. Instead he bails to the floor and pulls Aries outside with him, only to be rammed into the tress. Back inside and Manik is put in the Tree of Woe so Sabin can stand on his crotch.
Tenay says this is the 32nd time Ultimate X has been held, which is pretty frequent considering the company isn’t even twelve years old at this point. Joe snapmares Chris down for a loud chop to the back, making Sabin’s girlfriend Velvet Sky scream. Manik takes Joe down with a springboard dropkick as Hardy and Aries start going up the tress. Jeff pulls Austin down before Manik hurricanranas Hardy and Sabin down.
Aries is left alone in the ring and goes up, only to have Hardy pull him right back down before hitting the reverse powerbomb from last year. Since it’s a Jeff Hardy match, it’s ladder time until Joe hits a suicide elbow to take Jeff out. Sabin baseball slides the ladder into Joe but Manik dropkicks Joe down. Aries dives onto Joe and Manik but Manik gets back up and hurricanranas Sabin out to the floor.
Joe hammers away on Aries in the corner but the MuscleBuster is countered. Hardy comes back in but eats the running dropkick, followed by Joe getting the same. The brainbuster is countered into a swinging Koquina Clutch to send Aries outside. The champ goes up but gets pulled down into a low blow. Joe hits a running backsplash on Manik before getting dropkicked out to the floor by Sabin.
The Whisper in the Wind drops Sabin and now the ladder is brought in. Manik and Aries climb the ladder and fight over the belt but Sabin knocks it over. He goes after Hardy instead of climbing, earning himself a Twist of Fate. Sabin tells Velvet Sky to stop Hardy from climbing and throws her in the ring against her will. The distraction of Velvet in that tight of a dress lets Sabin run up the ladder to win the title.
Rating: C+. This was a good idea to freshen up the match but at the same time they’ve killed the concept. Why in the world would someone use the hard method of crawling along the ropes now instead of just climbing a ladder? It’s a nice followup to Sabin’s World Title run and heel turn, but it’s not like the title means anything outside of Destination X season.
It’s time for our theme of the night: great AJ Styles moments, starting with Styles becoming the first X-Division Champion back in 2002.
Here’s Bad Influence to fill some time since this is a seven match card. Kaz says no men have been screwed more than them since Brokeback Mountain. It’s an embarrassment that they’re not on the card tonight since Bad Influence IS TNA. They beat Chavo Guerrero and Hernandez and then had to face a lawyer and a fisherman so that shouldn’t even count. TNA loves to mess with things so let’s make it a three way for the Tag Team Titles.
This brings out Eric Young who says he’s here on scientific business. Earlier tonight, Bad Influence created a monster and everyone knows they should run. They beat him down but here’s Abyss to save his partner and clean house. Both Bad Influences take Black Hole Slams and Abyss helps Young up.
Gunner and James Storm tell the BroMans to not worry about their hair and girls because the champions are ready for them. JB’s hair looks funny for some reason.
Tag Team Titles: BroMans vs. James Storm/Gunner
Storm had a spot in a four way Tag Team Title match at Slammiversary and Gunner impressed him enough to get on the team. They won the belts and haven’t had much competition since. Mr. Olympia Phil Heath is with the challengers again. It’s a brawl to start with the champions cleaning house and Storm being backdropped over the top onto the BroMans. Back in and Storm throws Jesse across the ring before bringing in Gunner for some right hands to the head.
Gunner takes Jesse into the corner for some chops but a Robbie distraction lets Jesse pull him off the middle rope to take over. Robbie comes in legally and hammers away before giving it back to Jesse for two. E. quickly comes back in for a chinlock before Jesse breaks up a backslide attempt with a dropkick. The Bros break up a hot tag attempt and Jesse poses a lot. He gets crotched on the top though, allowing Gunner to hit a fall away slam to take Jesse down.
There’s the hot tag to Storm and house is cleaned again. James gets two off a top rope elbow and is sporting a big cut on his leg. Everything breaks down and Robbie escapes the Eye of the Storm before nailing an implant DDT for two. Gunner plants Robbie with an Irish Curse but Jesse breaks up the Gun Rack. A powerbomb/Backstabber combo gets a VERY close two on Robbie. The Last Call plants Jesse but Robbie throws in a title belt for a distraction, setting up the BroDown for the pin and the titles.
Rating: C-. I remember this being a bit better but the match wasn’t that bad. The near fall was really good and having new champions was a big surprise, but it was still missing something. I have no idea why Heath was out there as he didn’t add a thing to this match. Not bad but the new champs wouldn’t have anyone to feud with for awhile.
Video on Angle’s Hall of Fame induction.
Sting comes out to officially induct Angle into the Hall of Fame. Kurt comes out and thanks the fans but says he can’t accept this induction. This wound up being a story and Angle would eventually accept, which makes the Hall of Fame seem like a prop for angles rather than something special. It’s not a horrible thing but I still don’t like this. My guess however is it had something to do with Angle’s DUI in early August.
Clip of AJ wining the World title at No Surrender 2009.
Dixie Carter puts all of AJ’s merchandise on sale. Her nephew Ethan comes up and we get the new catchphrase: “The world needs us. We’re the Carters.” Well he’s easy to hate.
Knockouts Title: Gail Kim vs. Brooke vs. ODB
ODB is defending and Aces and 8’s member Brooke is Miss Tessmacher. Brooke is quickly run over and Gail gets sent to the floor by the champion. Back up and Brooke stomps away in the corner before giving ODB a Stinkface. That’s fine with ODB who pops up and chest bumps Brooke into the corner for a Bronco Buster. Gail gets back in and is quickly knocked right back to the floor. Brooke faceplants ODB for two as Gail is holding her arm.
ODB powers up to break a reverse chinlock but gets dropped by a running forearm. A spinning neckbreaker puts the champion down for two but Gail pulls Brooke down for a Figure Four around the post. ODB takes Gail down but Brooke gets two off a rollup. Off to a half crab on Brooke and Gail has to run in to break up a tap out. Both challengers go to the top so ODB tries to superplex them both, only to be shoved down. Gail missile dropkicks ODB and Brooke drops a top rope elbow on Kim to put all three on the mat.
ODB is up first to run everyone over but the referee gets crushed in the corner. Another shot knocks him out to the floor and we get the double fireman’s carry to show off ODB’s strength. Brooke falls off so ODB gives Gail the Bam onto Brooke’s body. Cue Lei’D Tapa to fight with ODB and knock the champion to the floor. A powerbomb plants Brooke and Tapa puts Gail on top for the pin and the title.
Rating: D+. Giving Gail a new monster bodyguard doesn’t make her any more interesting. Tapa had a different kind of look but at the end of the day, she was nothing compared to Ivelisse from Gut Check. The match was nothing we haven’t seen on Impact a bunch of times and just restarts the circle of Knockouts with the title all over again.
New broadcaster Gil Corsey (he didn’t last) is with the BroMans and Mr. Olympia. Protein shakes are poured and that’s about it.
Bobby Roode says he’ll prove he’s a better man than Kurt.
We recap Roode vs. Angle. Roode didn’t like Angle going into the Hall of Fame so he and Bad Influence (the Extraordinary Gentlemen’s Organization) inducted Bobby into the EGO Hall of Fame.
Kurt Angle vs. Bobby Roode
This is Angle’s first match back from rehab. Feeling out process to start with Roode actually taking him down to the mat. Kurt is a bit more hesitant to go after Roode this time but gets caught in a headlock anyway. A quick Crossface attempt sends Angle running but his ankle lock does the same to Roode. Back in and Roode hammers away in the corner until Kurt suplexes him out to the floor.
The fight heads out to the floor where another suplex drops Bobby. Angle tries one too many times though and gets his neck snapped across the top rope. Back in and Roode stomps away before getting two off a suplex. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Angle fights up with right hands. The Rolling Germans have Roode in trouble but he gets a shoulder up at two. The Angle Slam is countered with an armdrag and Roode gets two off a spinebuster.
Kurt escapes a Roode Bomb and puts on the ankle lock as we’re into the trading finishers section. The counter sends Angle arm first into the post and a DDT on the arm sets up the Crossface from Roode. A foot on the rope breaks the hold and Roode is getting frustrated. He walks into another suplex but avoids the moonsault. Roode slaps on the Crossface again but Kurt grabs the ankle lock to break the hold. I love that counter. Bobby pulls him down and puts on the Crossface again until Angle rolls over for two.
That gets rolled over for two more and Angle’s clothesline is countered into yet another Crossface. Kurt reverses THAT into another Angle Slam for two but he can’t follow it up. They slug it out from their knees and Kurt starts rolling more Germans. Bobby can’t take more of those though so he grabs the referee, allowing a low blow to Angle. The yet to be named Roode Bomb gets a very close two. He loads up another one but Kurt rolls down into the ankle lock.
Angle gets the grapevine for good measure and Roode starts to black out, but he’s being crafty. Channeling his inner Bret Hart, Roode is goldbricking and uses the referee checking his arm to grab the rope. Kurt is frustrated but takes Roode to the top for a Super Angle Slam. Both guys are down but Roode gets to his feet long enough to fall on Angle for a surprise pin. Angle never moved after hitting the Slam.
Rating: A-. This was the great match of the show with both guys showing off some awesome stuff. I like that they went with the Austin vs. HHH finish from No Way Out where they hit each other but HHH fell on top for a pin. It’s also the right call as Angle didn’t need the win and Roode gets the (unmentioned) win back from Bound For Glory 2011.
Angle is taken out on medics but wakes up when they try to put a neck brace on him, allowing him to walk out on his own.
AJ beat Sting at Bound For Glory 2009.
Styles is getting ready.
Bully Ray is in the back with a bunch of people we can’t see. A lot of the Aces and 8’s had left at this point so it’s implied they’re back tonight. Ray says the team is reborn tonight and says it’s all about the colors. We never saw who he was talking to.
Ethan Carter III vs. Norv Fernum
Fernum is a jobber who might weigh 150lbs and both guys are debuting tonight. Carter throws him around to start as you would expect before dropping him with a forearm. A high collar t-bone suplex makes Taz smile and Ethan rubs his face in the mat. Fernum scores with some dropkicks and a high cross body for two. Not that it matters as the yet to be named 1%er gives Ethan the easy pin.
Rating: C. Of course it’s not much of a match but this was exactly what you want from a debut for a guy like Carter. He’s become such an awesome heel and this was the kind of start they should have gone with. They played up the idea of Carter getting a handpicked opponent, which is something a rich guy would get. Smart and effective debut.
Magnus says he’s going to get his big win tonight and become the star he’s destined to be, even if it’s at Sting’s expense.
We recap Magnus vs. Sting. Magnus was in the finals of the Bound For Glory Series and lost, destroying his confidence. Sting said Magnus, his Main Event Mafia brother, was going to be a star and Sting was going to give him the chance to do just that.
Magnus vs. Sting
Both guys are good here and this is about making Magnus a star instead of a rivalry. They trade headlocks to start until Sting clotheslines Magnus down. A shoulder puts him on the floor and we’re in a slow start. Sting holds the ropes to let Magnus back in before getting knocked out to the apron with a European uppercut. The Brit holds the ropes open for Sting before leveling him with a clothesline to take over.
Off to a bodyscissors from Magnus for awhile until Sting finally grabs the ropes. Some ax handles have Sting in more trouble and Magnus stays on the ribs and back. Sting comes right back with a backdrop and the Stinger Splash followed by the Deathlock with very little torque on it. Magnus powers out of it and a double clothesline puts both guys down.
Back up and Magnus starts no selling shots to the face ala Sting vs. Flair back in 1987 before hitting a Stinger Splash of his own. A Michinoku Driver gets two but Sting shrugs off a Cloverleaf attempt. Now Sting starts no selling and hits his own Stinger Splash and another Deathlock with so little torque that the fans are barely interested. I guess Sting’s knees just won’t let him sit down anymore.
Magnus finally makes the rope and stops another Splash with a European uppercut. The Scorpion Death Drop puts Sting down and the top rope elbow gets two. A second elbow misses but Magnus fights out of some Death Drop attempts with HARD elbows to the face. Sting says Magnus to come on so Magnus takes him down and puts on the Cloverleaf for the very surprising submission.
Rating: D+. The fans are really not pleased with the ending and I can’t say I blame them. One of the biggest problems with Sting’s later TNA stuff is how fast his matches end. There’s no buildup to them and they just stop out of nowhere. This wasn’t a very good match either but that’s the case with almost all passing the torch matches. Without any hatred between them, there’s no reason for them to be fighting and it makes for a dull match.
They shake hands post match but Magnus doesn’t seem too interested.
AJ beat Magnus to get the title shot tonight.
Bully quotes Welcome to the Jungle to tell AJ that he’s going to die tonight. He doesn’t want AJ to die though. Ray wants AJ to have to live with himself and go back to Gainesville, Georgia and go into that trailer park so he can look at his kids and tell them he’s a failure. That will kill AJ and tonight, he’s in Bully’s jungle.
We recap AJ Styles vs. Bully Ray, which is almost all about AJ vs. Dixie. AJ won the title shot in the BFG Series but the main story is about Dixie Carter not wanting a hick like AJ as the world champion. She’s promised tonight is his last night in the company and has made the main event basically a street fight.
TNA World Title: AJ Styles vs. Bully Ray
Bully is defending and has the gorgeous Brooke with him. Ray powers him into the corner to start and says he can see the fear in AJ’s eyes. Styles tells him to bring it and gets taken down by the wrist. He finally rolls out but takes AJ down with a big boot to the face. Bully knocks him down again and tells AJ he’ll take care of the wife and kids. That just ticks AJ off and the drop down into a dropkick puts Ray down.
AJ’s Calf Killer goes on out of nowhere but Aces and 8’s member Garrett Bischoff comes out for a distraction. Ray picks up a hammer but AJ kicks it out of his hands and swings it himself. Bully prevents a bad case of death by chopping Styles a few times to Taz’s delight. He mocks Hogan with the hand to the ear before chopping AJ again. AJ asks him for another and Ray backs up into the corner out of fear. Styles goes off on him in the corner but gets nailed by a clothesline.
Ray’s next chop leaves a handprint on AJ’s chest but he comes back with kicks to the leg. Cue Aces and 8’s member Knux for a chokeslam on Styles, giving Bully two. Ray is ticked off at the near fall so he pokes Hebner in the chest, only to get shouted down. A big running clothesline hits Knux by mistake and AJ grabs a rollup for two. Ray kicks AJ right in the face to knock him out to the floor as this is picking up again.
They head outside and Ray picks up the hammer but gets Peled onto the announcers’ table. Styles loads up the springboard 450 but Ray moves, sending AJ crashing through the table for a huge wreck. Taz hands Ray a boxcutter so the champ can start cutting up the ring. He peels back the mat and then the padding underneath, leaving only the wooden boards.
With AJ still down, Ray calls the boys to the ring. Instead he gets Dixie because where would we be without her? She hands Ray a chair but AJ comes in with the springboard forearm to drive the chair into Bully’s face. The springboard 450 connects but Dixie tells Hebner not to count the pin. The hesitation lets Ray kick out at what should have been about 15. AJ’s Clash is countered with a backdrop onto the wood and Ray actually hits the middle rope backsplash. It’s only good for two though so Ray nails him in the back with a chair. AJ escapes the piledriver and nails a Pele, followed by Spiral Tap for the pin and the title.
Rating: B-. The match was good but it felt like a long segment at times instead of a match. The missed splash looked great and ripping up the ring was interesting, but man alive does Dixie Carter drag down segments she’s in. It’s not due to being a bad character as she’s easy to hate. It’s that I just do not want to see her involved because she’s going to get way more focus than she deserves and make things a lot more annoying than interesting.
As for AJ’s character, it’s questionable at best. We spent months on him as the loner who didn’t want anything to do with TNA and teased being a part of Aces and 8’s, but now he’s TNA’s conquering hero? That’s a stretch to say the least and the match felt more about Dixie vs. AJ by the end. They could save that for later on TV, which they would do again because TNA does some questionable things.
A bunch of recaps and a celebration end the show.
Overall Rating: C+. This show tried and had its moments but there’s not enough here to make the show great. That being said, not having to sit through the bad TV shows setting up this show made things a lot easier. It’s just the wrestling and the main event and Roode vs. Angle matches make it worth sitting through. Not a great show or anything and the booking continues to be AWFUL but the wrestling isn’t bad.
Ratings Comparison
Chavo Guerrero/Hernandez vs. BroMans vs. Eric Young/Joseph Park vs. Bad Influence
Original: C
Redo: C-
Chris Sabin vs. Austin Aries vs. Samoa Joe vs. Jeff Hardy vs. Manik
Original: C+
Redo: C+
Gunner/James Storm vs. BroMans
Original: C
Redo: C-
Brooke vs. ODB vs. Gail Kim
Original: D+
Redo: D+
Bobby Roode vs. Kurt Angle
Original: B+
Redo: A-
Ethan Carter III vs. Norv Fernum
Original: D-
Redo: C
Sting vs. Magnus
Original: C
Redo: D+
AJ Styles vs. Bully Ray
Original: C
Redo: B-
Overall Rating
Original: D+
Redo: C+
As usual, the lack of sitting through the build is a good thing. When TNA cuts out the nonsense of TV, they’re much easier to sit through.
So that’s Bound For Glory so far. Overall, the show is very endemic of TNA in general: they have good stuff, but the lack of creating top stars kills them. Four of the first five shows are more about Sting than anything else and the latter ones are mainly about Angle or Hogan. I get the idea of making them look strong so putting someone over them means something, but that only happened once at the biggest show of the year. Other than that, it’s almost all about making the old guys look good and that’s missing the point.
The show is worth checking out most of the time, but you can see TNA going downhill after about 2007. There’s almost always value to the show and none of them are horrible, but man alive they can be frustrating to sit through at times. Again, that’s true of so many things TNA does and they make it hard to be a fan for more than a little while at a time. Check out some of the better matches, but I wouldn’t recommend putting yourself through the full shows most of the time.