Smackdown – June 25, 2021: C For Depression

Smackdown
Date: June 25, 2021
Location: Yuengling Center, Tampa, Florida
Commentators: Pat McAfee, Michael Cole

We’re done with Hell In A Cell and that means it is time to get ready for Money in the Bank. A bunch of the ladder match spots have already been filled so it is time to start hammering out the rest of the field. Throw in Roman Reigns needing a new challenger and we could be in for a packed show. Let’s get to it.

Here is Hell In A Cell if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Roman Reigns beating Rey Mysterio in the Cell last week.

Paul Heyman tells Roman Reigns that the Mysterios are acknowledging him from their hospital beds. Jimmy Uso comes in so Reigns asks where Jey is. Jimmy called him a hundred times and finally got through to him, but Jey isn’t coming back. Reigns isn’t happy, but Jimmy says he’s got Reigns’ back. He says he can do everything Jey can, but Reigns doesn’t look convinced. Jimmy needs to prove himself.

Here is Bianca Belair to say we are three weeks away from leaving the Thunderdome and coming home. Tonight she gets to beat up Bayley again, because she has worked so hard to be here. She looks at the title and knows the work has been worth it, because she didn’t let a Bayley, or a bully, get to her. Everyone at home who is dealing with their own bully can make it too, but here is Seth Rollins to interrupt. He is VERY happy with beating Zazzaro, and he did better than Belair did against Bayley.

Rollins holds his hand up for a celebrating with Belair now, since she is going to be on the mat after the match. Cue Bayley to say the fans deserve a champion who doesn’t brag, so the staredown is on. Rollins offers a distraction so Bayley can jump Belair but Cesaro comes out to send Rollins flying. Bayley yells at Cesaro but Belair comes in to clear her out too.

Bianca Belair/Cesaro vs. Seth Rollins/Bayley

Cesaro takes Rollins down to start and drives him into the corner to it’s off to Bayley vs. Belair. The beating is on again and it’s already back to Cesaro, who cuts Rollins down with an uppercut. Cesaro gets sent into the middle buckle with a Downward Spiral though and Rollins grabs the chinlock.

Back up and Cesaro hits some uppercuts, only to get snapmared into a kick between the shoulders. A backflip gets Cesaro out of a suplex attempt and it’s back to Belair for a pair of nipups with a dropkick in between. Belair’s standing moonsault gets two but they head outside with Belair getting posted. We take a break and come back with Bayley working on the arm and slamming Belair down for two. Belair powers back up and brings Cesaro in to clean house, including the Swing to Rollins.

The springboard spinning uppercut gives Cesaro two but a Bayley distraction lets Rollins hit Cesaro in the back of the head. Belair makes a save of her own, prompting Rollins to say Belair and Cesaro are what’s wrong with this place. It’s back to the women with Belair’s spinebuster getting two as the guys fight on the floor. The KOD is loaded up but Rollins comes in to break it up. Bayley hits a running knee to set up the Rose Plant for the pin at 12:03.

Rating: C+. SO I guess Hell In A Cell means nothing either as we seem to be on our way to EVEN MORE REMATCHES between these people. That would certainly make sense given how WWE seems to enjoy doing things these day, but that doesn’t make it any more interesting. The match was pretty good, but egads they need to move on to something new.

Jimmy Uso is waiting outside of Roman Reigns’ dressing room when Paul Heyman comes out. Uso wants to know what Reigns means by proving himself, so Paul explains that Jimmy needs to be Main Event Jimmy Uso to help Reigns. Heyman says Reigns understands winning, so Jimmy needs to win a match. Jimmy says he has this, so Heyman goes to get the match made, while offering a threat if Jimmy loses.

We get the official coronation of Shinsuke Nakamura as the new King of WWE. Rick Boogs handles the guitar playing and the introduction. Nakamura receives his crown and we head to the back, where Baron (yes Baron) Corbin can’t talk about this.

Sonya Deville and Adam Pearce are enjoying the guitar playing when Seth Rollins comes in. Rollins thinks he is ready to face Roman Reigns next, as tonight we will be having the State of the Universal Title. He has never been more ready, but Pearce and Deville aren’t ready to make that decision. Rollins: “The time is now.”

Video on Otis’ path of destruction.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Big E. vs. Apollo Crews

Non-title and Commander Azeez is here with Crews. Big E. drives him into the ropes to start and sends Crews outside in a heap. Back in and Big E. charges into a boot in the corner but comes right back with a clothesline. They head to the apron with Crews hitting a Death Valley Driver to send us to a break.

We come back with Big E. fighting out of a chinlock but getting dropkicked down for two. The chinlock goes on again but Big E. powers up, only to have his belly to belly broken up. Big E. gets back up again and this time the Warrior Splash connects. The Rock Bottom out of the corner is countered though and Crews rolls some German suplexes.

That doesn’t last long as Big E. grabs a Stretch Muffler, sending Crews over to the leg for the break. An enziguri rocks Big E. so Crews goes up and gets two off a frog splash. An arm trap German suplex gives Crews two more and Big E. is sent outside. Azeez whips him into the barricade and loads up the Nigerian Nail….but gets caught just in time, meaning it’s an ejection. Back in and the Big Ending finishes Crews at 12:57.

Rating: C. There’s your “champ gets pinned but it doesn’t matter because this is about Money in the Bank instead of the title” box checked off. These two fought for months and now they have done so again in the name of something other than the title that Crews holds. Commentary was trying to make it a big deal that Big E. had never been in Money in the Bank, but it felt like more of a bit of trivia than a selling point.

We look at the banged up Kevin Owens losing to Sami Zayn.

Sami Zayn is VERY happy about his win and talks about how there is order to the chaos of the universe. This might be the greatest moment of his life….until he is told he is facing Kevin Owens in a Money in the Bank qualifying match next week. Sami storms off, declaring this the worst week of his life.

Post break, Sami asks Adam Pearce what is going on here and thinks he should just be in Money in the Bank. That’s a negative, because he has to qualify. Sami asks one more time but it’s off the table, which he describes as playing a very dangerous game.

Here is Sonya Deville to announce the first entrant in the women’s Money in the Bank ladder match: Carmella. Cue Carmella to say she’s happy with this but wants to be introduced as the Most Beautiful Woman In WWE. That brings out Liv Morgan to says he should be in the ladder match instead but Carmella says the match is for the stars. The fight is on but Deville says they can just have a match.

Carmella vs. Liv Morgan

Joined in progress with Carmella in control on the floor as Sonya Deville watches at ringside. Back in and Carmella sends her into the corner for a slow superkick. Morgan is right back with Oblivion for two as Carmella gets a foot on the rope. Carmella grabs a middle rope hurricanrana but Morgan rolls through into a cradle for the pin at 3:15.

Rating: D+. So this wasn’t for the spot in the ladder match and Morgan wins the series 2-1 but Carmella is in the ladder match anyway, despite losing the last two matches. I’m sure Liv will be added to the match as well, which will make the entire three match series completely meaningless. This should not surprise you at all.

Jimmy Uso dedicates his match to Roman Reigns.

Jimmy Uso vs. Dolph Ziggler

Bobby Roode is here with Ziggler. Uso starts fast with an enziguri but gets punched into the corner. Ziggler’s big elbow sets up a chinlock but Jimmy fights up without much trouble. Ziggler is sent outside so Jimmy can dive onto Roode, only to get caught in a Zig Zag onto the steps (egads) as we take a break.

Back with Ziggler hitting another Zig Zag for two and the frustration sets in. They slug it out from their knees with Uso using the headbutts but getting punched into the ropes. The Zig Zag is countered into a powerbomb which is countered into a sunset flip for two. Uso is right back up with a superkick for the pin at 9:43.

Rating: C. This could go a few ways, but it’s kind of hard to bring myself to care about someone beating Ziggler. That is almost the free space on the WWE Bingo card and while it is a new one for Jimmy, it isn’t exactly exciting. What might be interesting is seeing where this goes for Jimmy and Reigns, and ultimately that is what matters the most.

Uso heads to the back where Roman Reigns seems pleased but doesn’t say anything. Reigns heads towards the ring and Jimmy goes to follow him but Paul Heyman cuts him off.

Next week: Kevin Owens vs. Sami Zayn in a Last Man Standing Money In The Bank qualifying match.

Here are Roman Reigns and Paul Heyman for the State Of The Universal Title Address. We see a video on Reigns beating Rey Mysterio in the Cell, plus Reigns beating up Dominik for a bonus. Heyman talks about all of the people that Reigns has beaten up, including the Fiend, Cesaro, Kevin Owens, Braun Strowman, Edge, Daniel Bryan and Rey Mysterio. Reigns has cleaned out the division, so now he needs to make an announcement.

Before he can speak, cue the returning Edge to jump Reigns and the fight is on, with Edge knocking Reigns outside. A clothesline off the apron lets Edge send Reigns face first into the announcers’ table over and over. Back in and Reigns hits a Superman Punch to cut Edge off. Reigns goes for a chair but walks into a spear.

Edge loads up the Conchairto but here is Jimmy Uso to cut him off. That earns Jimmy a spear through the barricade as Reigns and Heyman escape. Edge: “WHERE YOU AT ROMAN???” On the stage dude. Just turn to the right. Posing ends the show. This works well as Edge didn’t get his big singles match, so he’ll do fine for the Money in the Bank challenger. Like Heyman said, who else is there?

Overall Rating: C-. The ending helped a good bit, but this show was really pretty depressing. It’s clear that we’re going to be seeing a lot of rematches (including some tonight) and that isn’t the most inspiring way to get us to Money in the Bank. The action wasn’t bad, but the level of interest took a big hit this week as it became clear that what we have been watching for weeks to get us to the Cell is going to be the same thing that gets us to Money in the Bank. Edge being back does help, but that’s about all the good there was.

 

 

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Smackdown – May 28, 2021: He’s The Head For A Reason

Smackdown
Date: May 28, 2021
Location: Yuengling Center, Tampa, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, Pat McAfee

It’s a tag team show this week as the Usos are reuniting to face the Street Profits, marking their first match as a team in about fifteen months. Other than that, the Mysterios are defending the Tag Team Titles against Dolph Ziggler and Robert Roode because this feud must continue due to reasons. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The Usos are ready for their first match back but here is Roman Reigns to interrupt. Reigns wants to know their endgame, with Jimmy saying the goal is to win. They want the Tag Team Titles next to Reigns’ Universal Title so they’ll have all the gold. Reigns is behind them and says good luck. Jimmy leaves and Jey looks worried, so Reigns asks if Jimmy is doing the talking for Jey now. Jey says he’s with Jimmy tonight but he’s with Reigns too. Reigns says he should go tell Jimmy, so Jey leaves too. You can feel the manipulation here.

Street Profits vs. Usos

Before the match, the Profits talk about how they had some fun with the Usos last week but now it’s time to get a little more serious. They were flattered by the challenge but they have been down since day one too. The Profits remember everything the Usos have been doing over the years, but these are some different Usos tonight. They haven’t been together in a long time and now Roman Reigns is living rent free in Jey’s head. Cue the Usos and we’re ready to go.

Well hold on actually as the Usos brag about their accomplishments and say a win here means they’re a step closer to getting the titles back. Angelo Dawkins doesn’t like the idea of being a stepping stone so they make a bunch of Mario references before we go to a break before the match.

Dawkins runs Jimmy over to start and it’s off to Ford, who wants to face Jey. That takes a little time to get going, so it’s a delay before Ford can armdrag him into an armbar. A double suplex lets Dawkins grab his own armbar but it’s off to Jimmy in a hurry. Jimmy hits a jumping forearm in the corner to take over and there’s a headbutt to keep Dawkins in trouble. Commentary can’t quite get Jey’s timeline with Reigns right (as the two of them have apparently been together for a year despite Reigns only being back about nine months) as Dawkins gets driven into the corner.

Jimmy comes back in and gets armdragged down, allowing the tag off to Ford. A double clothesline puts the Usos on the floor and Jey is sent into the timekeeper’s area. Jimmy goes over the announcers’ table and we take a break. Back with Ford ax handling Jimmy’s arm but Jey makes a blind tag and pulls Ford tot he floor. That means a toss into the barricade and the chinlock back inside as we see Roman Reigns watching in the back. A snap suplex gives Jimmy two and it’s back to Jey for a wishbone.

Ford manages a step up enziguri to send Jey outside so it’s Jimmy grabbing the legs. That’s fine with Ford, who nips up and hits a jumping enziguri to drop Jimmy as well. The diving tag….misses as Jey pulls Dawkins to the floor. Jimmy hits the Samoan drop and we take another break. Back again with Jey’s superplex being broken up and Ford hitting another enziguri. They clothesline each other though and that’s a double knockdown. Dawkins and Jimmy both come in with Dawkins sending him right back to the apron.

This time it’s Jimmy hitting an enziguri of his own but a right hand knocks him onto the top. Ford hits a heck of a running flip dive to drop Jey, leaving Jimmy to superkick Dawkins for two. The running Umaga attack is blocked and Dawkins’ double underhook swinging neckbreaker gets two, leaving him stunned. The spinebuster sets up the Cash Out but Jey pulls Jimmy out of the way. A low superkick finishes Ford at 21:46.

Rating: B+. This took some time to get going and they went a little enziguri happy but it was a heck of a match with the near falls and dives looking good in the end. The Usos are all but destined to get the titles back (or at least challenge for them) and I can certainly go for more of them. Either way, this was an awesome match from two great teams who got a lot of time. Check this out if you get the chance.

Robert Roode and Dolph Ziggler blame their loss on Rey Mysterio going nuts to protect his son at Backlash. Tonight is going to be different because they are a couple of aces.

Natalya/Tamina vs. Riott Squad

Joined in progress with Morgan coming in to….mess up a wheelbarrow toss to send Riott into the corner. Riott sends Natalya face first into the buckle for two and the chinlock goes on, as we see Tamina down on the floor thanks to an attack before the bell. Natalya can’t get a double Sharpshooter but Tamina is back up to break up a cover. The hot tag brings in Tamina, who gets forearmed by Riott. That’s broken up with a shove to send Riott throat first into the bottom rope. Morgan hits a Codebreaker on Natalya on the floor as Riott gets shoved off the top to set up the Superfly Splash for the pin at 3:57.

Rating: D. This was a total mess with spots missing, Tamina being gone for a good chunk of the match and the Codebreaker on the floor just being a detail at the finish. I’m still so glad to see the Riott Squad being fed to Natalya and Tamina, the latest thrown together team, making me wonder what the point is in having regular teams in the first place outside of being cannon fodder.

The Usos come in to see Adan Pearce and get a Tag Team Title shot next week against the winners of tonight’s title match. Jimmy is pleased but Jey looks very unsure.

Bianca Belair vs. Carmella

Non-title. In the back, Carmella says she has this and mocks Kayla Braxton’s dress. She says Bianca won at Wrestlemania in a bit of a shady way but Carmella has won a lot of things over the years. Tonight, it’s time to end Belair’s happily ever after. Hold on again as here is Bayley to join commentary. We get going with Belair driving her into the corner for some shoulders to the ribs. There’s a flying headscissors to put Belair on the floor so Carmella follows, only to get shouldered down.

Bayley keeps talking about Belair’s hair as Carmella is pressed back inside. Carmella gets in a cheap shot to set up an X Factor onto the apron for two. Some elbows in the corner keep Belair in trouble and we hit the chinlock. That’s broken up in a hurry with a backbreaker, followed by a handspring moonsault for two. Bayley rants about Belair’s hair again as a missed charge lets Carmella hit a superkick for two more. The Code of Silence can’t go on so “Belanca” according to Cole (Bayley: “BELANCA??? YOU STUPID IDIOT!”) hits the KOD for the pin at 5:41.

Rating: C-. Bayley was the absolute highlight here as she was firing off one great line after another as we seem to continue the build towards a hair vs. hair match. Belair is an athletic machine but she still needs a lot more polishing in the ring as there were a lot of sloppy sections in here. Carmella is a good choice for an opponent here as she has enough of a resume to matter, but this was all about Bayley.

Post match Belair poses with the title and Bayley laughs hysterically (Bayley: “LAUGH WITH ME!”)

The Mysterios promise to win tonight.

Here is a ticked off Seth Rollins to call out Cesaro for a fight right now. There is no Cesaro but Rollins isn’t going to let that ruin his birthday. We see a clip of Rollins attacking Cesaro last week to make his already banged up arm even worse, including when Cesaro was on a stretcher. Back in the arena, Rollins has exclusive audio from Cesaro’s hospital room (oh boy) and it’s…..I believe some kind of bodily function.

Rollins cracks up but then gets serious to talk about how unfortunate last week was. It was a scary situation and some of the blame has to be placed on the people at home. The fans are the people who made Cesaro believe he could disrespect Rollins, whose hands are clean. Rollins sings himself Happy Birthday to wrap this up.

Kevin Owens vs. Apollo Crews

Non-title and Commander Azeez is here with Crews. Owens sends him into the corner in a hurry and hits the Cannonball into a Swanton for a fast two. A superkick looks to set up the Pop Up Powerbomb but he has to settle for the Stunner instead. Azeez nails Owens for the DQ at 1:14. Were they running long and had to keep this short here?

Commentary makes it clear that Crews is still champion, mainly due to it being non-title. Owens can’t breathe after the Nigerian Nail so referees and agents come down to confirm that he in fact cannot breathe.

Jey Uso comes in to see Reigns, who isn’t happy about the title match. Reigns isn’t pleased as Jimmy is back and the Usos are relegated to the opening match. He doesn’t want Jey to go back to being “which one is he”. Jey seems to like this line of thinking.

Here is Rick Boogs to play play Shinsuke Nakamura to the ring again and McAfee is REALLY happy.

Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Chad Gable

Otis is here with Gable and jumps Nakamura to start, only to have Nakamura kick Gable down. Cue King Corbin to take his crown back as Nakamura can’t hit Kinshasa. Instead it’s a rollup for two and then Kinshasa can connect for the pin at 1:57.

Post match Corbin leaves with the crown but Boogs guitars him in the back and Nakamura gets the crown again.

Kevin Owens can barely talk but manages to tell Adam Pearce that he wants his title shot against Apollo Crews next week. The match is on, with Commander Azeez banned from ringside.

Rey Mysterio is praying before the match.

Post break and Rey has been attacked. You know the real money in wrestling seems to be in being a backstage security guard.

Tag Team Titles: Rey Mysterio/Dominik Mysterio vs. Dolph Ziggler/Robert Roode

Ziggler and Roode are challenging and insist that they had nothing to do with Rey being attacked (which makes sense as they were in the ring when we came back from a break). That should mean a forfeit, but Dominik says he’s going to step up like his dad did at Backlash. Ziggler: “THIS IS CHILD ABUSE!” So Dominik goes it alone and is taken down in a hurry to start.

Roode takes him into the corner to hammer away and Ziggler kicks Dominik down as well. A neckbreaker gives Ziggler two but Dominik manages to dropkick him to the floor. The slingshot dive drops both challengers but Roode breaks up the 619. With Roode knocked down, the 619 misses and Ziggler hits a Fameasser for two. A powerbomb/neckbreaker combination gets two but here is Rey, with the distraction allowing Dominik to roll Roode up for the pin at 6:59.

Rating: C-. As exciting as it was to see Dominik win in a handicap match, I’m rather looking forward to the Usos taking the titles so we can move on from the father/son thing. It hasn’t been very interesting and seeing the champs against any combination of Roode/Ziggler has not exactly made me want to see more of them. Not a terrible match but move on from this stuff already.

Post match here are the Usos for the staredown. Roman Reigns is not happy in the back to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The opening match more than carried this whole thing but that and the Reigns stuff was all that really worked on this show. That story is absolutely carrying Smackdown at the moment and I don’t see that changing anytime soon. Feuds over a crown and Dominik and Rey being father and son champions aren’t quite gathering my attention. Good show though, as the time continues to fly by.

Results

Usos b. Street Profits – Superkick to Ford

Tamina/Natalya b. Riott Squad – Superfly Splash to Riott

Bianca Belair b. Carmella – KOD

Kevin Owens b. Apollo Crews via DQ when Commander Azeez interfered

Dominik Mysterio/Rey Mysterio b. Dolph Ziggler/Robert Roode – Rollup to Roode

 

 

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Wrestlemania Backlash: Right Down The Middle

Wrestlemania Backlash
Date: May 16, 2021
Location: Yuengling Center, Tampa, Florida
Commentators: Adnan Virk, Byron Saxton, Corey Graves, Pat McAfee, Michael Cole

It’s time for the Wrestlemania fallout pay per view and this time WWE isn’t exactly being subtle with the concept. The Raw side is mainly consisting of Wrestlemania rematches with another name added in, while the Smackdown side actually feels like some fresh matches. Hopefully that mixes together for a good show. Let’s get to it.

Here’s Sheamus to issue the open challenge, non-title of course.

Kickoff Show: Sheamus vs. Ricochet

Ricochet hammers away to start but gets taken down with a heck of a clothesline. Sheamus takes him into the corner and pounds him down, setting up the forearms to the chest. The fishhooking (dubbed the Dublin Smile) has Ricochet in even more trouble but Ricochet gets in some kicks to the chest.

The springboard clothesline into the standing shooting star into the Lionsault gives Ricochet two. Sheamus knees the heck out of him though but Ricochet hits a Backstabber into a springboard 450. The 630 misses though and Sheamus blasts him with another knee for the pin at 7:13.

Rating: C+. If nothing else, it was great to see Ricochet on a show outside of Main Event for a change as it makes me wonder if WWE is actually acknowledging the fact that he has been doing good stuff over there. That’s the kind of thing you can use these open challenges for, though the clean pin didn’t do him the most favors. It was better than nothing though, so maybe Ricochet’s fortunes are turning around a bit. I doubt it, but maybe.

Post match Sheamus puts on his hat and coat but Ricochet dropkicks him down and steals both of them.

The opening video, narrated by Batista, talks about how important Wrestlemania is while talking about where everything is going from here. The main matches get their focus as usual, while being interspersed with clips from Batista’s new Netflix film Army of the Dead.

We recap the Raw Women’s Title match, with Rhea Ripley defending against Charlotte and Asuka. Ripley took the title from Asuka at Wrestlemania but then Charlotte returned and was put into the title match. Now it’s time for a triple threat for the title.

Raw Women’s Title: Rhea Ripley vs. Charlotte vs. Asuka

Ripley is defending and Charlotte’s gear is Cruella de Ville/101 Dalmatians inspired. Graves calls Ripley “arguably the one with the most to lose in this match.” Charlotte bails to the floor to start but gets surrounded and the beating begins, including a double superkick to put her on the floor. Asuka rolls Ripley up for two but Charlotte pulls Asuka outside and grabs a suplex. Charlotte and Ripley have the showdown, with Charlotte shouting about being a THIRTEEN TIME CHAMPION.

Asuka is back up but Ripley kicks her down, followed by a dropkick to do the same to Charlotte. Ripley heads to the apron but Charlotte trips her down to take over. Back in and Charlotte talks trash to Asuka, who strikes away in a hurry. Asuka snaps off the armbar but Charlotte gets her feet to the ropes….which don’t count in a triple threat match. Ripley makes the save but Charlotte sends her face first into the middle buckle. Charlotte has to chop Asuka though, allowing Ripley to come back with some clotheslines.

Asuka is back up with the rapid fire strikes and the rolling German suplexes to Charlotte. The missile dropkick hits Ripley and a sliding knee from the apron rocks her again. Charlotte kicks Asuka outside and there’s the moonsault to take both of them down. Back in and a double superplex drops Charlotte to put everyone down. They slug it out from their knees but Charlotte flips out of another double suplex and chop blocks them both.

A double Natural Selection gets a double near fall but Charlotte misses the moonsault. Asuka Codebreakers Charlotte and counters the Riptide, allowing Charlotte to boot Ripley in the face. Charlotte spins out of the Asuka Lock and boots down a charging Asuka. The boot causes Charlotte to fall to the floor though and Ripley Riptides Asuka to retain at 15:22.

Rating: C+. As expected, this was more about Charlotte than anything else, as it seems to be in her contract. Ripley escaped with the title (as commentary put it) and odds are we are going to be seeing the Ripley vs. Charlotte showdown in the near future. Ripley winning is good, but it would be nice to not have to be reminded that Charlotte is the greatest and most amazing thing ever every time she is in a big story (which is about all she does).

We look back at Braun Strowman, Drew McIntyre and Bobby Lashley brawling on Raw.

Miz isn’t scared of Damian Priest but doesn’t know why this is a lumberjack match. Not to worry though as John Morrison is ready to take care of the lumberjacks and make Priest fall into his thirst trap. Miz: “I don’t think you know what thirst trap means.”

We look at Robert Roode and Dolph Ziggler attacking Dominik Mysterio on the Kickoff Show.

Dominik can’t go so Rey Mysterio says he’ll do this himself.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Dolph Ziggler/Robert Roode vs. Rey Mysterio

Mysterio, in Adam West era Batman gear, is challenging on his own and hits them both in the face to start. Ziggler is knocked outside and a baseball slide sends him into the announcers’ table. Mysterio slides through Roode’s legs to splash Ziggler but Roode sends him head first into the apron. Back in and Rey drop toeholds Roode down setting up a victory roll for two.

Roode blasts Rey with a clothesline though and Ziggler comes in to rip at the face. It’s already back to Roode, who sends Rey into the corner to remind him there is no one to tag. Rey avoids a charge and dropkicks Ziggler off the apron but Roode knocks Mysterio into the Tree of Woe. Roode starts working on Rey’s knee and a wheelbarrow Fameasser combination gets two. Ziggler heads outside so Roode can throw Mysterio into a superkick (that was new/cool) for the nine as Ziggler can’t believe he beat the count.

Back in and Rey hits a double DDT, setting up a toss to send Ziggler into the post. Cue the banged up Dominik to get on the apron as Rey sends Roode outside, only to get Zig Zagged. Roode is back in for two off a gutbuster but he takes too long going up, allowing Rey to hit a super bulldog.

Rey gets over to the corner where Dominik tags himself in…and is spinebustered by Roode. Dominik is sent into the post but comes back with a superkick to Ziggler. The hot tag brings in Rey to clean house, including a 619 to Roode in the corner. Rey brings Dominik back in and sunset bombs Ziggler into the apron, setting up Dominik’s frog splash for the pin and the titles at 16:59.

Rating: B-. The action was good and the result is the right way to go, but I’m not sure why they couldn’t have just done the scheduled match without the Dominik injury angle. It was a dull start until Dominik got in and some things started happening though and that’s what mattered. What matters is getting the titles off of Roode and Ziggler though, as their reign was about as useless as you could get.

Post match, the Mysterios are rather pleased.

John Morrison goes to the lumberjacks’ conveniently labeled dressing room and finds….a bunch of zombies.

Jimmy Uso goes in to see Roman Reigns but finds Jey Uso. Jimmy thinks the door needs to say Roman Reigns and Jey Uso, or better yet, “Jimmy and Jey Uso, Tag Team Champions.” Does Jey even do Reigns’ laundry? Jey is ready to fight but here is Roman Reigns to stare Jimmy down. Jimmy wishes him good luck tonight and leaves.

John Morrison reports his zombie findings to Miz, who seems to think Morrison imagined it. The two leave and the zombies stagger after them.

Commentary (with a zombie on one of the screens behind them) explains that the zombies are from Batista’s Army of the Dead movie. Ah. Well that makes up for everything.

Damian Priest vs. Miz

John Morrison is here and there are indeed zombies, who have their own Titantron and theme music. They are everywhere, including underneath the announcers’ table, sending commentary running. Priest hammers away to start but gets knocked outside, where he beats up the zombies. Back inside and Miz gets in a big boot as Graves hits his tenth Walking Dead reference in about two minutes.

Priest sends him outside for a change and hits a clothesline on the way back in. The spinwheel kick sets up the top rope spinwheel kick for two more. Miz is back with the Figure Four until they get over to the ropes for the break. Both of them head outside to beat up the zombies together before diving back inside. Morrison gets on the apron for a distraction, allowing Miz to hit the running knee for two. The zombies pull Morrison behind the barricade and apparently eat him, leaving Priest to Hit The Lights on Miz for the pin at 6:54.

Rating: F. Yeah I’m thinking no on this one. A zombie horde just attacked Miz, Morrison and Priest on pay per view and outside of what is likely a comedy spot tomorrow night for Miz and Morrison, we’re just going to move on. It’s a paid sponsorship and all that jazz, but Priest could be something on Raw (which desperately needs it) and he gets this instead. This was really annoying and as little as I was looking forward to another Miz vs. Priest match, they managed to make it even worse. The wrestling itself was pretty dull, but egads man. Just let Priest be a star already.

Post match the zombies swarm Miz as Priest leaves.

Hell in a Cell is coming on June 20. Normally that’s an October show so that’s interesting.

Jey Uso catches up with Jimmy Uso, who thinks the sign on the door should say “Roman Reigns and his b****.”

We recap Bayley vs. Bianca Belair for the Smackdown Women’s Title. Belair won the title at Wrestlemania and Bayley is ready to prove that it was a fluke, because she is the best ever.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Bayley vs. Bianca Belair

Belair is defending as Miz and Morrison being devoured by zombies about ten minutes ago is already just a memory. They go technical to start but Belair takes her down into a waistlock with ease, seemingly freaking Bayley out. Bayley teases going after the hair so Belair rolls her up for two, with the kickout sending Belair into the corner. A hiptoss brings Bayley back in from the apron and it’s already time for the breather.

Back in and Bayley knees her down, setting up a chinlock to draw Belair back to her feet. A belly to back suplex gets two on Belair but she catches Bayley on top and hits a delayed suplex. They head outside with Bayley dropping her ribs first onto the steps and adding a suplex onto the floor for two. A spinning side slam gives Bayley two more but Belair sends her outside for a change.

That gets on Bayley’s nerves and she comes back in to hammer away. Belair makes the comeback and hits a spinebuster for two. Bayley runs her over again with a clotheslines and drops the top rope elbow for two of her own. With Belair sent outside again, Bayley misses a charge, allowing McAfee to get in MJF’s “better than you and you know it” line.

Back in and a rollup with feet on the ropes gives Bayley two. Bayley even rakes the eyes to keep Belair in trouble, allowing her to use the hair for a ripcord Bayley to Belly and another near fall. With nothing else working, Bayley loads up the Rose Plant with the hair, but Belair rolls her up and uses the hair to hook the leg for the pin to retain at 16:02. The ending might have been a bit botched though as the hair dropped the leg halfway through, making it looked like Bayley kicked out.

Rating: B-. There were some somewhat sloppy moments here but they did a nice job of keeping me into the match. It might not have had a ton of drama, but what mattered here was getting a lot of time on the way to getting Belair her first major title defense out of the way. The ending could set up a rematch, which somehow may already be inside the Cell. That’s a bit of a jump, but I could go for a rematch.

MVP suggests that Braun Strowman isn’t smart enough to accept the business offer he was given and tonight, he is going to lose as a result.

We recap the Raw World Title match. Bobby Lashley won the title in March, beat Drew McIntyre to retain at Wrestlemania, and then both McIntyre and Braun Strowman became #1 contender.

Raw World Title: Drew McIntyre vs. Bobby Lashley vs. Braun Strowman

Lashley, with MVP, is defending. It’s a brawl to start with Strowman getting double teamed as the other two head outside. McIntyre sends Lashley into the post until Strowman dives off the apron to drop both of them. Back in and McIntyre runs Lashley over before hitting a neckbreaker on Strowman. They head outside again with Strowman using the steps to take both of them down but the non-Strowmans double team him down too.

Lashley suplexes McIntyre onto the ramp but another suplex into the ramp is blocked. McIntyre rams Lashley head first into the set over and over before tossing him through it, meaning we get some sparks. That leaves McIntyre alone to scream and…..get taken down by Strowman. There’s the Strowman Express to put McIntyre down at ringside, setting up the backsplash for two back inside. A missed charge sends Strowman into the corner though and McIntyre hits a pretty impressive Michinoku Driver for two.

Strowman backdrops him to the floor and tries the Express again but McIntyre belly to belly suplexes him (with Strowman landing on his head). The Claymore is countered into a powerbomb through the announcers’ table as the canned chants declare this awesome. Commentary declares that Strowman is about to be the new champion because WWE commentary gets extra dumb in triple threat matches. Back in and the running powerslam is countered, with McIntyre hitting the Claymore. The spear to Strowman retains the title at 14:18.

Rating: C+. And then they go on to the Cell with Lashley vs. McIntyre because this feud needs to continue to suit the calendar so Raw doesn’t have to come up with a single new idea ever because that’s not what they do. I did not want to see this match coming in and I don’t want to see any form of a rematch, but that is what we are going to get because Raw doesn’t exist to be entertaining or creative any longer. This was a completely watchable triple threat power match with one of the most overdone endings you’ll get, which shouldn’t surprise you at all.

Hell in a Cell ad.

We recap Cesaro vs Roman Reigns. After dispatching Daniel Bryan, Reigns needed a new challenger so Cesaro stepped up and issued the challenge. Cesaro then beat Seth Rollins to earn the shot, his first ever one on one match at the World Title. Jimmy Uso returning and not being cool with Reigns treating his brother like a servant is being added in as a bonus factor.

Smackdown World Title: Cesaro vs. Roman Reigns

Reigns is defending but before the match, he has Jey stay in the back because he is too worried about Jimmy. They start slowly with Cesaro powering him into the corner. A shoulder doesn’t get anyone anywhere as McAfee’s microphone is breaking up badly. Cesaro rolls him up for two and it’s time for a meeting with Paul Heyman at ringside. Back in and Reigns sends Cesaro face first into the buckle but Cesaro scores with the springboard spinning uppercut.

The Swing is blocked though and Cesaro tweaks his arm, which Reigns sends into the post. Reigns grabs a cravate and suplexes him down for daring to try a comeback. The cravate goes on again and the jumping clothesline gives Reigns two. Reigns loads up the Superman Punch but Cesaro counters it into the pop up uppercut. Some kicks and elbows to the leg set up the Sharpshooter on Reigns, who gets to the ropes in a hurry. Cesaro sends him outside for a corkscrew dive, followed by a high crossbody for two.

Reigns catches him on top though and grabs the arm again for a big boot, meaning the arm gets pulled again. The shotgun dropkick sends Cesaro’s shoulder into the post for two back inside and it’s time to crank on the arm even more. Reigns mocks Cesaro saying wrestling is fun and knees away in the corner, followed by a big boot to drop him again. Some uppercuts give Cesaro a breather and the discus lariat drops Reigns, only to bang up the bad arm even more.

They slug it out from their knees with Cesaro knocking him to the apron, setting up the apron superplex for two more. The arm gives out on the Neutralizer attempt though and Reigns pulls him down into the Fujiwara armbar. That’s reversed into a cradle for two but another springboard uppercut is Superman Punched out of the air for two.

The pop up uppercut doesn’t work again as the arm gives out, allowing Reigns to grab the guillotine. Cesaro powers out and gets the Sharpshooter (pulling back with the hands instead of wrapping the arm around) before switching into a Crossface in the middle of the ring. Reigns powers out of the grip and unloads with forearms to the face, followed by a Batista Bomb for two.

Cesaro flips him over but Reigns is right back with a front facelock into the guillotine. That’s reverses with something close to a powerbomb and Cesaro slips out, only to get pulled into it again. Cesaro tries to power out of the grip but the arm can’t do it and Cesaro is finally out at 27:24.

Rating: B+. Cesaro certainly brought it here and will likely get another title shot at some point. There is zero shame in losing to Reigns at the moment and Cesaro gave it quite the run here. This felt like a main event and Reigns broke a sweat, though I wasn’t quite believing that Cesaro was going to pull it off. Cesaro just getting here was the real accomplishment, making this more like the first Rocky vs. Apollo Creed fight. Very good match here, as Cesaro showed he can go at this level.

Post match here is Jey Uso to acknowledge Reigns with the lei, before jumping Cesaro. Cue Seth Rollins….to go after Cesaro as well. Rollins stomps him to the floor and hits him with a few chair shots. The chair is wrapped around the bad arm and sent into the post, followed by a Stomp on the floor to end the show. That’s probably your Smackdown Cell match.

Overall Rating: C+. This is one of the hardest ratings I’ve ever had to put together because the show is so torn down the middle. The Smackdown stuff was good to very good with matches that had been built up (some better than others) and then executed well enough. Their side did well and it felt like half of a pay per view.

Then there’s Raw and oh my goodness. I watch the show every week and somehow they have managed to get even worse time after time. Not only did the build feel lazy coming into the show (Hey, here are the Wrestlemania matches with one extra person added in as we keep talking about Wrestlemania!), but then you had another Charlotte showcase (#1928 I believe), a three way match where they hit each other over and over and then someone stole the pin and then……that other match.

First of all, I get why they did the zombie tie-in. It’s a check from Netflix and Batista is in the movie and all that good stuff. All fine and good, but there was NOWHERE else on the show to put that? Not as a segment, a backstage deal, or with R-Truth or something? No clearly the best solution was to put it in a match that didn’t need to happen in the first place and make the whole thing into a commercial instead of a way to make Priest look good. The match completely took me out of the rest of the show and I could not bring myself to be interested in anything else they did until the main event got rolling.

Tonight was a perfect summary of Raw in a few hours: the creative is repetitive and lazy and they do not care about building up anyone new because they know people are going to watch anyway. Smackdown is a perfectly fine if not good wrestling show and Raw is whatever garbage Vince and Bruce green light after turning down what are probably much better ideas. So enjoy your three hours of nonsense as the show continues to spin its wheels for years on end because WWE has gotten paid and it isn’t like they would get paid MORE with a bigger audience or anything.

Overall, this show was right down the middle, with the Smackdown stuff feeling good and the Raw stuff feeling like Raw stuff. Outside of the commercial called a match, the Raw matches were far from terrible, but they felt like something that had to be done instead of something with effort put into them. That has been the case from Raw for a long time now and there is nothing to suggest it is going to get any better.

Results

Rhea Ripley b. Asuka and Charlotte – Riptide to Asuka

Rey Mysterio/Dominik Mysterio b. Dolph Ziggler/Robert Roode – Frog splash to Roode

Damian Priest b. Miz – Hit The Lights

Bianca Belair b. Bayley – Rollup

Bobby Lashley b. Braun Strowman and Drew McIntyre – Spear to Strowman

Roman Reigns b. Cesaro – Guillotine
 

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Wrestlemania Backlash Preview

It’s time for the followup to Wrestlemania and this time they are making that as obvious as possible by calling the show Wrestlemania Backlash. WWE has run Backlash for years but this time around, WWE does not exactly seem to be putting much effort into the Raw side of things. Smackdown is a different story, but egads Raw is not exactly inspiring me here. Maybe the show can wind up going a bit better in action. Let’s get to it.

Raw Women’s Title: Rhea Ripley(c) vs. Asuka vs. Charlotte

There is no word on if WWE is going to do what they want to do and bill this as Charlotte vs. the world, as Asuka and Ripley, the champion, have felt like afterthoughts in the whole thing. That is not exactly a shock but unfortunately it is reality, as Ripley already beat Asuka at Wrestlemania so now it is time to bring Charlotte in. Why? Well because it’s always time to bring Charlotte in.

I’ll take Ripley to retain here though, as I think WWE knows they can’t just put the title right back on Charlotte as soon as possible. Ripley absolutely needs the win more, though it isn’t going to matter all that much if Charlotte continues to get all of the focus. Asuka is probably taking the fall here, setting up the rematch from Wrestlemania XXXVI so Charlotte and Ripley can have their showdown. I’m not sure where it goes from there, but Ripley holds onto the title here to keep things moving.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Robert Roode/Dolph Ziggler(c) vs. Rey Mysterio/Dominik Mysterio

The fact that I sighed as soon as I typed that out says a lot about the match. Ziggler and Rey had a match on Smackdown which had me wondering how much longer I could keep my eyes open. The tag format should be a little bit better and the idea of the father and son going after the titles works fine. The problem is Ziggler and Roode have defended the titles twice in four months, which isn’t the right way to make the fans care about them or the titles.

I think the Mysterios get the titles here, though it seems to be a matter of time before the reunited Usos get the belts back. There is zero point to keeping the titles on Ziggler and Roode at the moment, though they have been around for a long time now and them retaining would not stun me. I’ll go with the title change here though, if nothing else for a nice moment.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Bianca Belair(c) vs. Bayley

This is Belair’s first major defense after winning the title at Wrestlemania, which should tell you where this is going. I’m curious to see how Belair does in a slightly less high pressure situation which is still a pretty high level match. Bayley is a good person to put her out there with though, and hopefully everything winds up working well. Belair is the future though and I think you know what that means.

Belair retains here, as we get to find out where she can go as the long term champion. If nothing else, they aren’t taking the title off of her before they get to the big rematch with Sasha Banks. Bayley is the right kind of opponent to boost up Belair’s stock and we could be in for a pretty good match as well. There shouldn’t be much doubt here, so being able to create some is going to be a nice challenge.

Damian Priest vs. The Miz

Yeah this is still going and I’m not sure I get why either. It isn’t a fresh match and it isn’t an interesting one, but above all else it isn’t something that is going to help Priest in the long run. Priest is already in his late 30s and I’m really not sure why he is wasting even more time facing Miz, who he has beaten before. This really needs to be it, but that was the case with Wrestlemania too.

I’ll go with what makes sense here, as there is no reason for Priest to lose or come close to it. They seem to be teasing the idea of splitting up Miz and John Morrison in the near future, which wouldn’t be the greatest thing in the world but right now, Priest needs to win. He doesn’t have the big singles win on his own yet and while Miz isn’t that, a win could be a nice stepping stone to his future.

Raw World Title: Bobby Lashley(c) vs. Braun Strowman vs. Drew McIntyre

Egads I don’t care. I really just do not care. Strowman is being added to the whole thing to keep this from being a rematch from Wrestlemania/this week’s Raw and….my goodness I don’t know why that is supposed to be interesting. Strowman has not been interesting in a long time and adding him in isn’t going to make fans care about this match any more than they already do. That’s what we’re getting here though and hopefully we are done soon thereafter.

In theory, Lashley should retain here as there is almost no reason for anything else to happen. Strowman getting the title back is not going going to happen and McIntyre doesn’t need it again. The match is going to be the hoss fight and should be entertaining enough, but my goodness it has been a rough build, and that is not the kind of thing that makes me want to see the match.

Smackdown World Title: Roman Reigns(c) vs. Cesaro

We’ve finally gotten to Cesaro’s title shot, though honestly that might be what qualifies as making it for him. Reigns is on another planet at this point and no one should be taking the title from him for a LONG time, so Cesaro just getting to this spot after all these years is pretty impressive. It would be an amazing match to see with fans in person, especially if Cesaro gets to Swing him, but I think you know how this is ending.

Of course Reigns retains here, because there is no reason for anything else to happen. There might be a rematch set up and they might do it again at Money in the Bank, but Reigns could lose a pair of limbs and still wind up retaining the title here. Cesaro might win the title one day, but that day is not going to be Sunday, because Reigns is going to be champion for a long time to come.

Overall Thoughts

This feels more and more like the May pay per view that is taking place because we have to have a May pay per view, which isn’t exactly keeping my interest up. That being said, the six match card probably means they are likely to be out in less than three hours. That’s quite the relief, as this does not feel like anything resembling a major pay per view. If they can get in, get out and be done, this could be a lot worse. I’m not overly thrilled to see the show, but I’ve seen worse cards.

 

 

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Smackdown – May 14, 2021: It Couldn’t Last Forever

Smackdown
Date: May 14, 2021
Location: Yuengling Center, Tampa, Florida
Commentators: Pat McAfee, Michael Cole

It’s the go home show for Wrestlemania Backlash and the show is mostly set. It seems like we could be in for another of the shorter edition pay per views, meaning there might not be anything else added. That could work out in the end, as some of the matches need a little more seasoning. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here is Jey Uso, who wants an explanation from Jimmy Uso for last week’s disrespect. For now though, Jey brings out Roman Reigns, but first we get a long recap of Jimmy’s return and worries about whose side he was on. Reigns talks about how he respects Cesaro, just like a lot of the boys in the back do. Cesaro is one of the best wrestlers in the world, but Reigns is so much more than a wrestler. Does WWE want Cesaro in his role? Does FOX want that?

We hear about how many World Title matches Reigns has had….and here is Jimmy Uso, in a shirt saying “Nobody’s B****”, to interrupt. Jimmy says Jey is out here acting like Reigns’ b**** but he has a shirt waiting for him in the back whenever Jey gets his head on straight. Yeah Reigns is the head of the table, but he isn’t the whole family. Reigns asks if Jimmy thinks he (as in Reigns) can beat Cesaro, but Jimmy doesn’t think so.

Jimmy says he and Jey could be the head of the table if they won the Tag Team Titles and Reigns lost the Universal Title. That sends Reigns into a mixture of anger and laughter before asking if Jimmy can beat Cesaro. Jimmy calls Cesaro out as Reigns chuckles behind him. As Jimmy asks Reigns if that was good, here is Cesaro to interrupt. Cesaro keeps it simple by saying he accepts the challenge and promises to take the title on Sunday. Reigns was great here, as his little mannerisms and attitude are great.

Women’s Tag Team Titles: Nia Jax/Shayna Baszler vs. Tamina/Natalya

Jax and Baszler are defending and have Reginald in their corner. Jax hammers on Tamina to start so it’s off to Baszler, who gets headbutted across the ring. A catapult into the Samoan drop plants Tamina but Reginald’s distraction means no count. That’s enough for the ejection, allowing Nia to Samoan drop Tamina into the barricade. Back from a break with Tamina down and Jax ramming Natalya head first into the mat.

The running hip attack in the corner crushes Natalya again but she avoids a charge, allowing the hot tag to Tamina. House is cleaned in a hurry until Shayna twists Tamina’s ankle around. Tamina shoves Jax off the ropes and Natalya takes Baszler outside for a German suplex into the barricade. Back in and Jax hits Natalya with the Samoan drop….and then just lays there so Tamina can hit the Superfly Splash for the pin and the titles at 9:28.

Rating: C-. That ending was rather awful and Nia could not have made it look much worse. The rest of the match worked about as well as expected as they have built up Tamina winning her first title. I’m not sure the reign is going to last long, but at least the champions are a fresh pairing for once.

Post match Natalya and Tamina talk about fighting for their dreams and never giving up. Pyro goes off as I’m not sure if this is as big of a deal as WWE thinks it is.

Here is Apollo Crews to present a medal of honor to Commander Azeez, who is standing on some steps in the ring. Crews praises Azeez but here is Big E. on the screen to interrupt. He wants the Intercontinental Title, but here is Sami Zayn, to say he wants the Intercontinental Title. Cue Kevin Owens to go after Zayn and the big brawl is on, with Big E. being left standing tall as Crews and Azeez run.

Rey Mysterio vs. Dolph Ziggler

Dominick and Robert Roode are here too. Feeling out process to start with Mysterio picking up the pace. Ziggler shoulders him down and starts the trash talk, including saying Rey doesn’t have it anymore. Mysterio manages to send him outside though and there is the big dive to take us to a break.

Back with Rey missing a springboard crossbody so Ziggler can take over again. There’s a reverse powerslam for two on Rey and we hit the chinlock with the arm cranked back. The bow and arrow stays on the back but Rey fights up and knocks him away. Rey gets caught on top but manages to knock Ziggler down again, only to miss the 619. Ziggler is back with the Fameasser for two and tries a slam, which is reversed into a small package to give Rey the pin at 13:20.

Rating: C-. Maybe it’s that these two have been around for the better part of ever but I could not bring myself to get interested in this. You know what you’re getting from both of them and they didn’t stray from that whatsoever here. It was a technically fine match, but not something I could get into, much like the upcoming title match.

Cesaro talks about knowing he could be World Champion for so long now and has been telling himself that he knows he can. He isn’t bred for this business like Reigns, but he knows he can beat Reigns.

Rey and Dominick Mysterio promise to win the Tag Team Titles. Dolph Ziggler and Robert Roode come in to call Dominick a baby, but Dominick says they’ll be calling him baby champ. No they won’t because no one outside of the WWE writers’ room would ever actually say that.

Here is Bianca Belair to talk about how everyone has doubted her for her entire life but she doesn’t listen to them. We see her brawls with Bayley, who pops up on the screen to laugh at Belair. Bayley isn’t here in the building because of Belair attacking her last week, but she’ll take the title on Sunday. Belair promises to be the EST and Bayley laughs a lot so Belair brings up the Bellas throwing Bayley down the ramp at Wrestlemania. You know, the night where Belair was in the main event and winning the title. Bayley promises to take the title and glaring ensues.

King Corbin vs. Shinsuke Nakamura

Nakamura promises to be the only king who survives. Corbin says he can beat Nakamura in a suit and watch, so imagine what he can do now. Nakamura takes him into the corner to start but gets choked on the ropes for the effort. The rapid fire kicks, including one to the head, put Corbin down. Back up and End of Days is countered, allowing Nakamura to grab the triangle choke. Corbin can’t powerbomb his way to freedom but he can stack Nakamura up for the pin at 3:04.

Rating: D+. Another mostly nothing match as the uninspired stretch of the show continues. I have long since given up on the possibility of Nakamura being a long term top star around here so this was hardly some career killer. Instead it was Corbin getting another win, as WWE continues to reheat him over and over due to reasons that I do not quite understand.

Post match Corbin puts the crown on but gets taken down by Kinshasa. Nakamura steals the crown, despite losing clean a few seconds ago.

Apollo Crews and Commander Azeez come in to interrupt Adam Pearce and Sonya Deville. He isn’t happy with the interruptions earlier but Sonya says be nice or Pearce might make him face everyone at once. Pearce says we’ll do that next week, with Crews defending against Big E., Sami Zayn and Kevin Owens.

Aleister Black talks about how his father taught him about the cruelties of life, which takes us to Chapter Three: The Lesson. His father taught Black that he is a cruel man but he needed to fight through it. Black could teach us that, but we are spectators instead of participants.

Jimmy Uso thinks the Usos are the hottest tag team ever, or at least they can be if Roman Reigns will stay out of it. Now he’s going to get it against Cesaro.

Backlash rundown.

Jimmy Uso vs. Cesaro

Jimmy goes for the arm to start and gets dropkicked down (Cesaro: “WELCOME BACK UCE!”). Back up and Jimmy teases a knee injury, allowing him to kick Cesaro in the ribs and take over. We hit the chinlock for a bit, with Cesaro powering up and hitting a suplex. Cesaro’s charge goes shoulder first into the post though and Jimmy clotheslines him to the floor. There’s the suicide dive but Jimmy grabs his knee as we take a break.

Back with Jimmy superkicking Cesaro out of the air for two. Jimmy goes up top but Cesaro catches him with an uppercut, setting up the top rope superplex. That’s enough for Cesaro to go out to the floor, with Cesaro following with a running flip dive. Cesaro throws him back in but here is Roman Reigns to jump Cesaro for the DQ at 9:33.

Rating: C. Jimmy needed to get his feet wet again and Cesaro can do that with almost anyone. The ending was the right way to go as you don’t want Jimmy taking a fall, yet you also want Reigns to see worried about Cesaro. They couldn’t keep Jimmy out there that long either so this was about as good as it was going to get.

Post match Jimmy yells at Reigns for making it all about himself. Jimmy walks away from Reigns and Jey Uso but Reigns follows him, saying no one cares about this. It’s all about the big money matches, but Cesaro jumps Jey in the ring. Reigns goes in and the Usos have to make the save, leaving Cesaro to Neutralize Jey twice in a row to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This was the first major miss from Smackdown in a long time as the show completely hit a wall at about the halfway mark. Maybe it is just how long some of these people have been around, but I had no interest in the Mysterio and Corbin matches. They felt like matches being put out there to fill in the space on the card and that isn’t a good way to go. It was far from a terrible show, but it was very dull and in a lot of ways, that is worse.

Results

Tamina/Natalya b. Nia Jax/Shayna Baszler – Superfly Splash to Jax

Rey Mysterio b. Dolph Ziggler – Small package

King Corbin b. Shinsuke Nakamura – Rollup

Cesaro b. Jimmy Uso via DQ when Roman Reigns interfered

 

 

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Smackdown – May 7, 2021: Throw It Back

Smackdown
Date: May 7, 2021
Location: Yuengling Center, Tampa, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, Pat McAfee

It’s time for a special show with a Throwback edition of Smackdown. I’m not sure what that is going to entail but we are going to be seeing at least the old logo. I can’t imagine we’ll be seeing the big fist just due to logistics, but a few cameos should be in order as well. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a Rock montage talking about Smackdown.

The opening video is a collection of all kinds of old school stuff, including Gorilla Monsoon on pay per views.

The (modern version of the) old WWF logo is back and McAfee is in a Vince McMahon blue blazer, while Cole is in the denim shirt.

THE FIST IS BACK! Ok so it’s a digital one but it’s there!

We look at the main event of the first (non-pilot) Smackdown, with guest referee Shawn Michaels cheating the Rock out of the WWF Title.

Here are Roman Reigns, Paul Heyman and Jey Uso for a chat. After a look back at last week’s war against Daniel Bryan and Cesaro making the save from a post match beatdown, Heyman says he is here to eulogize the career of Daniel Bryan. We get a ten bell salute, with Heyman making the sounds instead of waiting on “Mr. Schmucky Timekeeper.” Reigns says he is a man of his word so you should acknowledge him. He gives everyone what they want, from the fans to FOX to Daniel Bryan.

Last week he smashed Bryan, pinned him (not quite) and got rid of him. If Bryan wanted to be here, all he had to do was acknowledge Reigns. They have replaced Bryan with someone who will acknowledge him….and here is the returning Jimmy Uso. Celebrating ensues but here is Cesaro to interrupt. Cesaro says you cannot replace Daniel Bryan but he doesn’t have time to worry about Reigns when he is facing Seth Rollins tonight.

Cue Rollins to jump Cesaro from behind the brawl is on outside. Referees break it up, but here is Teddy Long, to say that he has been granted the authority to make a decision. Therefore, if Cesaro wins tonight, he will get his shot at Roman Reigns for the Universal Title at Wrestlemania Backlash. Reigns jumps Cesaro from behind so Rollins can send him into the steps. They go inside and take a break as I try to figure out why Cesaro came out in the first place.

Promotional consideration, paid for by the following: ICO-PRO.

Cesaro vs. Seth Rollins

The Usos are at ringside. Cesaro, favoring his shoulder, pulls himself up and says ring the bell so Cesaro knocks him to the floor in a hurry. Back in and Cesaro hammers away but Rollins slips out of a gorilla press and kicks the knee out. Cesaro reverses a suplex into one of his own but the Swing is blocked. Instead Cesaro rolls him up for two but the Neutralizer is countered into a backdrop to the apron. Jey Uso offers a distraction so Rollins can hit the top rope superplex into the Falcon Arrow for two more.

Back with Rollins getting to the rope to avoid the Sharpshooter and Crossface but Cesaro puts him on top instead. Rollins comes right back with a buckle bomb but Cesaro comes out of the corner with a hard clothesline. Rollins gets sent outside where Jey checks on him, but Rollins doesn’t want the help and shoves him down. That earns Rollins a superkick so Cesaro dives onto Jimmy. Back in and the Neutralizer sends Cesaro to Backlash at 12:42.

Rating: C+. It wasn’t quite their Wrestlemania match but it wasn’t supposed to be. This was about getting Cesaro to the pay per view and they did that quite well, with the Uso screwup probably getting them in trouble with Reigns. Cesaro is on a roll and it makes a lot of sense to give him the title shot at the pay per view. Good stuff here, and Rollins teasing a bit of a different side could be very good for him.

Post break, we look at what we just saw.

Rollins comes in to see Roman Reigns and asks who he should be mad at. Reigns doesn’t want Rollins dealing with his family, because that’s Reigns’ job. Rollins says fix it or he will.

Classic Smackdown Moment: Steve Austin beats up Booker T. in the grocery store.

Teddy Long and Sonya Deville are in the back when Sami Zayn comes in to say that since Teddy is unbiased, he can give Sami the match that he needs. Teddy: “Tonight you can go one on one with the Undertaker!” Actually, we’ll have a tag match with Zayn/Apollo Crews vs. Big E./Kevin Owens/Street Profits/Shinsuke Nakamura. Zayn complains about the numbers being wrong, so Sonya suggests adding Otis and Chad Gable. Long likes that, and throws in King Booker. Sonya corrects that to King Corbin…..and now Long wants to dance as Sami leaves. Long is either senile or way funnier than I thought. I’ll go with the latter.

Roman Reigns yells at Jimmy Uso for screwing up after only being back for an hour. Jimmy isn’t going to be talked to like that and leaves, with Jey trying to calm things down.

Carmella vs. Ruby Riott

Liv Morgan is here too. Carmella takes Ruby into the corner and dances out but gets shouldered back down. A hair pull takes Riott back down but she headscissors Carmella face first into the middle buckle. An STO gets two on Carmella and they go into a pinfall reversal sequence until Carmella gets in the Cone of Silence for the tap at 2:18. This was just a way to get Carmella back with a win.

Classic Smackdown Moment: Edge and Hulk Hogan win the Tag Team Titles. It still looks weird to see Hogan with that belt.

Classic Smackdown Moment: Big Show and Brock Lesnar break the ring.

Here is Bayley for a chat. She is here to celebrate the great women’s champions of WWE, because they are the women who put their bodies on the line for you. We see shots of Alundra Blayze (Bayley: “She’s no Bayley.”), Jacqueline (who held the title twice, but not as long as Bayley), Lita (Bayley’s childhood hero), Trish Stratus, Ivory, Beth Phoenix, Molly Holly and of course Bianca Belair.

Bayley calls Belair young and excited but naive, because she isn’t on Bayley’s level. She sees insecurity in Belair’s eyes because Bayley is going to be the first and last challenger for the title. Cue Belair who says she is champion whether Bayley likes it or not. The brawl is on with Bayley sending her into the corner and even pulling on Belair’s earring. Bayley says listen to her and hits the bulldog driver.

Jey catches up to Jimmy (who was about three seconds ahead of him and apparently has not stopped walking for the last ten minutes) and asks if Jimmy really meant all of that. Jey explains that Reigns is family but Jimmy doesn’t like Reigns talking to them like that. Jimmy says Reigns would say he doesn’t need them but Jimmy needs Jey. They need to get their Tag Team Titles back and be champions with Reigns if they want to represent the family. It would be weird to have the Usos on the show and not at least going after the titles so it makes sense.

Classic Smackdown Moment: John Cena debuts.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Rey Mysterio

Robert Roode and Dominik Mysterio are ringside. Before the match, Ziggler says Dominik is just famous for being Rey’s son so get out of the ring and let the adults handle this. Dominik wants to have the match instead so here we go.

Dominik Mysterio vs. Dolph Ziggler

Dolph talks trash to start so Dominik slaps him in the face. Ziggler shoves him up against the ropes and shouts that Dominik doesn’t belong here. Dominik sends him to the floor but gets tripped down, setting up a slam on the outside. Back in and a neckbreaker gives Ziggler a posing two count but Dominik small packages him for the pin at 2:15. Keeping Dominik’s matches short is probably not the worst idea here.

Reginald talks about how Tamina disrespected him last week. Next week, Nia Jax and Shayna Baszler are going to retain the Tag Team Titles over Tamina and Natalya. For tonight though, it is time to cleanse the bad taste from Nia’s mouth. Nia: “Aw Reggie.”

Promotional consideration paid for by the following: WWF Ice Cream Bars!

Classic Smackdown Moment: Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Roman Reigns tells Paul Heyman to bring him his cousin. Heyman: “Which one?” A glare makes Heyman understand. That was great.

Tamina vs. Reginald

This feels like a random match made by a glitching copy of WWE2K20. Natalya, Nia Jax and Shayna Baszler are here too. Reginald bails into the ropes to start and then heads outside to continue the stalling. A running clothesline is countered with a standing moonsault and he flips out of a grab of the hair. Tamina puts him on the top so Reginald flips away to land on his feet. That earns him a superkick and the Superfly Splash is loaded up but Baszler shoves Tamina off the top for the DQ at 2:15.

Post match Natalya and Tamina get beaten down, including Tamina being Samoan dropped into the barricade.

Team Apollo Crews is ready, though Sami Zayn seems to be the odd man out.

Team Big E. is ready and Shinsuke Nakamura wants the smoke.

Alpha Academy/Sami Zayn/King Corbin/Apollo Crews vs. Street Profits/Big E./Kevin Owens/Shinsuke Nakamura

Commander Azeez is here with the villains. Dawkins armdrags Gable down a few times and hands it off to Ford. That’s fine with Crews, who comes in and hammers away before mocking the NEW DAY ROCKS clap. Zayn comes in to work on Ford’s arms but Ford backflips away and hits the great dropkick. It’s off to Big E. to headlock Corbin, who drives him into the corner for some cheap shots from Zayn. Owens isn’t having this and the big brawl breaks down on the floor. The bullfrog splash from the apron crushes Zayn and we take a break.

Back with Otis cranking on Owens’ neck and hitting a splash in the corner. Crews comes in but gets enziguried down for a breather. Owens adds a spinwheel kick and the hot tag brings in Nakamura to start cleaning house with kicks all around. Everything breaks down and we hit the parade of secondary finishers. Gable German suplexes Owens on the floor but gets Pounced by Dawkins. Ford adds a big flip dive to the floor, leaving Nakamura to hit Kinshasa on Zayn. Corbin tags himself in though and hits End of Days to finish Nakamura at 10:43.

Rating: C+. This could have been worse, even if Corbin getting a win made me roll my eyes. To be fair though, Corbin hasn’t been doing much as of late so reheating him a bit might not be the worst idea. You’re only ever going to get so much out of such a big match like this so it was about as much as you could have asked to see.

Roman Reigns is not pleased with Jey Uso but wants to give Jimmy another chance. Jimmy is going to get a chance to show where he stands right now.

Classic Smackdown Moment: Vince McMahon experiences Eddie Guerrero’s low rider.

Here are Roman Reigns, Paul Heyman and Jey Uso to wrap things up. Reigns starts recapping things but here’s Jimmy to interrupt. Jimmy recaps Jey vs. Roman Reigns in the I Quit match in the Cell, where Jimmy ran in for the save and got choked out, with Jey quitting to save his brother.

After that tape that they just happened to have laying around, Jimmy says he never would have quit. Reigns can’t believe that’s what this is about because he and Jey have moved forward. He isn’t going back and forth with Jimmy, who needs to fall in line and stand with them. Either that, or go home and watch Reigns and the Uso (singular) with his kids.

Jimmy goes to leave, gets conflicted, and then keeps walking. Jey goes to the floor to talk to him but here is Cesaro to jump Reigns. Despite Jimmy trying to hold him back, Jey runs in for the save but gets beaten down. Jimmy hesitates but comes in to go after Cesaro as well, earning himself the pop up European uppercut. A nearly botched Neutralizer plants Jey and there’s a better one to Reigns to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This show mainly focused on the Reigns/Usos stuff, which worked out well enough, including the cliffhanger at the end. It isn’t exactly revolutionary and feels a bit like the Young Bucks’ recent issues in AEW, but it’s nice to see the Usos back in some form. The rest of the show was the usual hit and miss variety pack, though the idea of Reginald vs. Tamina still makes my head hurt quite a bit.

As for the big Throwback theme…..well the logos were certainly there. Given that it was a FOX deal that they are doing over the weekend, I can’t get too mad at WWE for not having the biggest enthusiasm for this one. The clips were nice to see (despite having seen them quite a few times now) and the digital fist was better than nothing….I think. WWE can do these things well, but this was more of a bonus feature for some window dressing than an overall theme, so it’s not like there was much of a grand expectation.

Results

Cesaro b. Seth Rollins – Neutralizer

Carmella b. Ruby Riott – Cone of Silence

Dominik Mysterio b. Dolph Ziggler – Small package

Tamina b. Reginald via DQ when Nia Jax interfered

Alpha Academy/King Corbin/Sami Zayn/Apollo Crews b. Street Profits/Big E./Kevin Owens/Shinsuke Nakamura – End of Days to Nakamura

 

 

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Smackdown – April 30, 2021: Spades, Hearts, Clubs And Diamonds

Smackdown
Date: April 30, 2021
Location: Yuengling Center, Tampa, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, Pat McAfee

We are rapidly approaching Wrestlemania Backlash and that means it is time to start hammering the card home. However, that is going to have to wait this week as there is a major main event. In this case, that means Roman Reigns defending the Universal Title against Daniel Bryan, who has to leave Smackdown if he loses. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening (and narrated) video sets up tonight’s Universal Title match.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Bianca Belair to get things going. After a quick Belair highlight package, she welcomes us to the show but here are Dolph Ziggler and Robert Roode of all people to interrupt. Before they can say much, here are the Street Profits to interrupt. Before they can say much, here is Bayley to interrupt. Bayley laughs at her and gets dropped, meaning the big brawl is on before the scheduled six person tag.

Bianca Belair/Street Profits vs. Bayley/Dolph Ziggler/Robert Roode

Joined in progress with Belair crucifixing Bayley for two. Belair hits a dropkick into a nipup so it’s Ziggler coming in to face Dawkins, even though Belair was ready to do it herself. Everything breaks down in a hurry and Ford hits a big flip dive to take out Roode and Ziggler. Bayley drives Belair into the steps on the floor though and the distraction lets Ziggler superkick Ford.

Roode comes in to plant Ford with a swinging Rock Bottom for two. Bayley gets in a cheap shot from the apron and Ziggler slaps on the sleeper to the avail of the average sleeper. With that broken up, Ford beats Ziggler to the superkick and the hot tag brings in Dawkins to clean house. Belair gets an airplane spin on Ziggler and there’s the KOD to Bayley. Roode kicks Dawkins in the face though and an O’Connor roll with tights…is broken up by the hair whip. The Anointment into the Cash Out finishes Roode at 6:44.

Rating: C+. This was energetic in the time that it had and that’s how a six person tag should go, especially with a heck of a finish. Belair is already set to defend against Bayley at Backlash and it would make sense to have the Profits get the title shot as well. At the moment, is there anyone else worth having a shot anyway?

Daniel Bryan is excited for the main event because he finally has a fair fight for the title. He has made Roman Reigns tap before and he is going to do it again. If he wins, his first title defense is going to be against someone who has waited a long time for his shot: Cesaro.

A laughing Seth Rollins prediction for the title match is….Bryan winning in a huge upset. As far as Cesaro is concerned, he isn’t making it past next week.

Natalya and Tamina jump Nia Jax and Shayna Baszler in the back before their match.

Natalya/Tamina vs. Nia Jax/Shayna Baszler

Non-title and Reginald is here with Jax and Baszler. Tamina takes Nia down to start but a splash hits knees. Nia gets her into the corner and Baszler adds a running knee to the face. A slam doesn’t work for Jax and Tamina slips over for the hot tag to bring in Natalya. House is cleaned for a bit until Baszler strikes her down. Jax comes in off the blind tag and drops an elbow for two as everything breaks down. Tamina gets caught on top but headbutts Baszler down, setting up the Superfly Splash for the pin at 4:53.

Rating: C-. Just in case the three stories that Nia Jax already has aren’t enough, here’s another feud for her to stay on TV. I’m trying to get my head around the idea of Tamina being pushed as a face, especially when there are quite a few more interesting women on the roster with nothing to do. Not a terrible match, but the idea of being interested in these teams in a title match makes my head hurt.

Booker T. picks Roman Reigns.

Next week: Old School Smackdown. Cool.

Shinsuke Nakamura picks Daniel Bryan.

Rey and Dominik Mysterio think it would be cool to win the Tag Team Titles.

Aleister Black talks about people looking at him and judging him because this is the nature of man. We go to the animation again, with Black talking about walking the halls in high school and having everyone think something about him. People cared about building their own lives on a foundation of lies. Imagine thinking that is real or falling for that. His father never fed him those dreams, because the truth is that there is something horribly wrong with all of that and all of you. He could give us the keys, but he won’t. The animation is a different way to go and these are intriguing so far.

We look at Apollo Crews winning the Intercontinental Title from Big E. at Wrestlemania with the help of Commander Azeez.

Big E. says he has been around the world and everyone is asking him what he is going to do to overcome Azeez. Tonight, Big E. is getting his baby back and putting it in the passenger seat, with the buckle fastened because safety first of course.

Xavier Woods picks Daniel Bryan.

Kofi Kingston picks Roman Reigns.

Intercontinental Title: Big E. vs. Apollo Crews

Crews is defending and has Azeez with him. An early hiptoss puts Crews down and we hit the abdominal stretch. With that broken up, Big E. sends him to the apron for the splash and an early two. Back in and a hot shot staggers Big E. and a clothesline puts him down. Big E. rolls outside so Crews drops him again and we take a break. We come back with Big E. throwing some suplexes to get out of trouble.

Crews avoids a charge to send him outside and the apron moonsault drops Big E. again. Back in and Big E. runs him over, setting up the Warrior Splash for two. Crews nails a pimp kick for the same but charges into the Rock Bottom out of the corner for another near fall. They head to the apron with Crews hitting the Death Valley Driver, setting up the frog splash for two. Big E. is right back up with the Big Ending but Azeez pulls him outside for the DQ at 10:06.

Rating: C. They couldn’t have telegraphed the ending harder but that isn’t the worst thing in the world at times. I’m really not sure where Big E. goes once he is done with Crews, as I don’t think he is going to get the title back. The good thing about these matches is Crews is getting rather comfortable in his new role and it is working a lot better than I would have expected.

Post match the beatdown is on bug Kevin Owens comes in for the save. Big E. and Owens can’t quite stop Azeez but here is Sami Zayn with the Helluva Kick to Owens. Zayn orders Azeez to beat down Big E., who is sent outside. Sami hands the title to Crews….and gets dropped with the Nigerian Nail.

Miz picks Reigns, naturally.

After accepting Seth Rollins’ challenge for a match next week, Cesaro picks Bryan, so he can win the title at Backlash.

Here’s how the title match was set up.

Paul Heyman is sick of hearing about Daniel Bryan, who never should have been broken into this business. Now, has Bryan had a Hall of Fame career? Yes yes yes. Is he always the ultimate underdog? Yes yes yes. Did he dominate the minor leagues? Yes yes yes. Did he graduate to the big leagues and win the title in the main event of Wrestlemania? Yes yes yes. Now did he do it one more time and defy everyone’s expectations? Yes yes yes. Does everyone believe that he can do it one more time? YES! YES! YES! And will he do it??? NO! Bryan is done on Smackdown after tonight. Heyman’s intensity here was outstanding.

We get a clip from Wrestlemania XXX of the Miracle On Bourbon Street.

King Corbin doesn’t care who wins but wants Bryan gone.

Universal Title: Roman Reigns vs. Daniel Bryan

Reigns, with Paul Heyman and some rather epic new music, is defending. Bryan dropkicks him into the corner to start and fires off the kicks but Reigns drops him with a single shot. A headlock is countered into a failed YES Lock attempt with Reigns bailing to the floor. That means a dropkick through the ropes into a running knee from the apron as we take a break. Back with Reigns turning him inside out off of a clothesline and grabbing a snap suplex.

The chinlock goes on to keep Bryan in trouble, followed by a right hand to the head to put Bryan down again. Bryan fights back with some kicks and puts Reigns on top, but the super hurricanrana is countered into a superbomb for two as we take a break. Back again with Reigns firing off some knees in the corner. Bryan gets in a shot of his own and puts Reigns on top for a belly to back superplex.

The cover is delayed so Reigns gets out, meaning they’re both down again for a bit. Bryan is up first and gets smart by kicking at the arm a bit more, followed by some snaps over his shoulder. Reigns misses a charge and falls to the floor, setting up the suicide dive. That’s pulled out of the air and Reigns snaps off a belly to belly. The spear only hits barricade though and we take another break.

Back again with Bryan hitting the Swan Dive for two but Reigns hits the Superman Punch for the same. The running knee connects but Reigns gets a foot on the rope. Bryan slaps on the YES Lock, which is quickly reversed into a cradle for the break. Reigns hits the spear for a near fall and Reigns is stunned. The guillotine can’t go on in full as Bryan reverses into the YES Lock again but Reigns powers out. The heavy forearms knock Bryan silly and a heck of a powerbomb plants him again. Reigns goes to pick him up and puts on the guillotine, this time with the healthy arm and Bryan is out at 27:18.

Rating: A-. This was just a step behind their Fastlane classic and that’s more than great on a free TV match. There is something great about Bryan using the technical abilities to cut Reigns down but Reigns kept coming back with straight power. Then Reigns switched to the intelligence by switching to the good arm for the win and that was just too much. Awesome match here, and one of the better TV matches in recent memory. Also: McAfee was outstanding here and sounded like the best and most polished WWE broadcaster in a very long time. He really is awesome at this and I’m impressed.

Post match Reigns grabs some chairs but here is Cesaro for the save. Cesaro knocks Reigns to the floor but Jey Uso jumps him from behind. Uso ties Cesaro in the ropes and Reigns gives Bryan the Conchairto to end the show.

Overall Rating: B+. This show was all about the main event and that delivered in spades, hearts, diamonds and clubs. You don’t get a TV match like that very often and it made a pretty good show into a very good one. Most of the Backlash card is pretty clear and the ending of this show should set up the other main event. Check out the main event though, as it really is a heck of a struggle with a great story being told.

Results

Bianca Belair/Street Profits b. Dolph Ziggler/Robert Roode/Bayley – Cash Out to Roode

Tamina/Natalya b. Nia Jax/Shayna Baszler – Superfly Splash to Baszler

Big E. b. Apollo Crews via DQ when Commander Azeez interfered

Roman Reigns b. Daniel Bryan – Guillotine

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Smackdown – April 23, 2021: The Kind Of Show I Like

Smackdown
Date: April 23, 2021
Location: Yuengling Center, Tampa, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, Pat McAfee

We’re less than a month away from Wrestlemania Backlash and it looks like we might be coming up on a big Cesaro match. The question now though is who that will be against, as the options seem to be Roman Reigns, who Cesaro challenged, and Seth Rollins, who interrupted that challenge last week. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Cesaro calling out Roman Reigns last week, plus WWE’s obsession with Cesaro’s UFO move to Rollins. Cesaro called out Roman Reigns but Seth Rollins interrupted instead, picking things up where they left off at Wrestlemania.

Here is Cesaro to open things up, but Seth Rollins interrupts him in a hurry. He can’t believe what happened last week because Cesaro is still very good at what he does. Rollins brought Cesaro up because Seth is the modern day Mr. Wrestlemania. Cesaro seems ready to fight now but here is Jey Uso to join Rollins. They surround him, which brings out Daniel Bryan for the save.

Bryan can’t believe he is seeing this because someone like Rollins is defending his spot. Bryan grabs his mic and praises Cesaro for working harder than anyone, including Rollins and Bryan himself. Now that Cesaro is here, maybe Roman Reigns can accept the challenge. Or maybe Reigns can come out here and jump them from behind because Reigns really doesn’t like to fight.

Cue Reigns, who finds this amusing after he destroyed Edge and Daniel Bryan at Wrestlemania. Reigns even has a picture of the double pin on his shirt. That makes Bryan a loser, and Cesaro following him makes Cesaro a loser too. Reigns finds it interesting that Cesaro and Bryan are talking this much when they are surrounded by people who want to hurt them.

Cesaro/Daniel Bryan vs. Seth Rollins/Jey Uso

Bryan kicks away at Uso to start and a double slam gives Cesaro two. Cesaro hits his delayed vertical suplex for the same but Uso gets over for a tag to Rollins to take over. This time it’s Cesaro being knocked into the corner, setting up Uso’s running Umaga attack. The chinlock goes on but Cesaro powers his way up and grabs a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. That’s enough for the hot tag to Bryan, who starts firing off the kicks.

Rollins’ Pele is countered into an ankle lock into a bridging German suplex for two. Rollins is right back with the Buckle Bomb, allowing Uso to nail the Superfly Splash for two more. Cesaro is taken outside for a double suplex on the floor and we take a break. Back with Bryan in trouble this time, including Rollins hitting a running kick to the side of the head. Uso stomps away, including a few kicks to put Bryan down in the corner. Bryan kicks Rollins in the face but walks into Uso’s Samoan drop for two.

Rollins comes back in to yell at Bryan for daring to suggest that Cesaro works harder. Bryan manages a kick of his own and stereo crossbodies allowing the hot tag to Cesaro. House is cleaned in a hurry but the Swing is blocked. Instead Cesaro has to hammer Uso down but the Neutralizer is countered with a backdrop. Bryan is back in to clean house again, including a suicide dive to Rollins.

That leaves Cesaro to cut off Jey’s dive and take him back inside. Cesaro’s top rope something is knocked out of the air and we take a rare second break. Back again with Cesaro fighting out of trouble but the Swing is countered with a superkick. Apparently that’s enough for Rollins, who walks out as Cesaro crotches Uso on top, setting up the apron superplex. Bryan is back in and the running knee is good for the pin at 19:07.

Rating: B. Long and rather good match here, with the second break being a surprise. The amount of talent involved here carried the whole thing as it is almost impossible for people at this level to have a bad match. Bryan as the advocate for Cesaro is interesting, though I would be almost disappointed if we didn’t see them have a match on the big stage at some point. What we got here is working for now though and that’s all it needed to do.

Post match, Bryan grabs the mic and calls out Roman Reigns again but Uso tries to jump them. That earns a long form Cesaro Swing, allowing Bryan to mock Reigns for not coming out here to help his family. Bryan thinks Cesaro should swing Uso again, with Cesaro doing it even longer this time as Bryan talks about how this is disrespectful to Reigns’ family and to the Head of the Table. Still no Reigns, which Bryan thinks means Reigns is scared of losing the title to Cesaro, who seems rather pleased.

Apollo Crews and Commander Azeez interrupt Adam Pearce and Sonya Deville because Crews has to defend the Intercontinental Title tonight. Pearce says it’s true that he does, and while it won’t be against Big E., he will get his shot one day. For tonight though, Crews can defend against Kevin Owens.

Jey Uso is stick of the disrespect and is ready to stop Cesaro tonight.

Nia Jax vs. Tamina

Shayna Baszler, Natalya and the returning Reginald are all at ringside. Nia drives her into the corner to start as Cole tries to say that the only thing people were talking about at Wrestlemania was the Women’s Tag Team Title match. Nia shouts a lot so Tamina fights up and hits a Thesz press with some right hands.

Shayna’s distraction doesn’t work and Tamina knocks Jax to the floor. Tamina drives her into the barricade and then back inside,, where Reginald offers a distraction. That lets Tamina kick Shayna down and….I think she was supposed to go into Reginald but she gets up to stalk him instead. The distraction lets Tamina hit a superkick into a rollup for the pin at 2:40.

Kevin Owens wasn’t expecting an Intercontinental Title shot tonight but he’ll certainly take it. He can’t wait to take Crews off his perch, but here is Big E. to interrupt, saying this should be his title shot. Owens says he’s getting the match, and then after his opportunity, it’s his title. Laughing ensues but Big E. doesn’t seem happy.

Daniel Bryan asks Adam Pearce to make Cesaro vs. Roman Reigns and even gets a little intimidating.

Intercontinental Title: Kevin Owens vs. Apollo Crews

Crews, with Commander Azeez, is defending. Owens drives him into the corner to start and takes Crews down by the leg for some surprising technicality. That is switched into a headlock on the mat so Crews fights up, only to get headlocked again. Crews fights up so Owens snaps off a dropkick to put him down again. A running elbow sets up the backsplash to crush Crews a second time.

There’s a clothesline to the floor but Azeez cuts that off in a hurry. Crews gets in a shot off the distraction and a snap suplex gets two. The corner stomping is on as we hear about the President of Nigeria possibly wanting to have dinner with Crews. A moonsault to the floor misses so Owens snaps off a superkick, setting up the Swanton for two. Cue Sami Zayn to strut to ringside as we take a break.

Back with Sami on commentary and Crews headbutting his way out of a superplex attempt. Owens superkicks him down two but Crews is back with a hot slot. A clothesline turns Owens inside out for two more, followed by an enziguri into the rolling German suplexes. Zayn and McAfee are about to get in a fight of their own as Owens avoids a charge in the corner and snaps off his own German suplex.

Back to back Cannonballs get two (Sami: “FAST COUNT! FAST COUNT!”) but the Stunner is blocked. Instead Owens settles for another superkick into a pop up sitout powerbomb for two. The threat of the frog splash sends Crews outside so Owens hits it from there instead. Back in and an Azeez distraction lets Crews grab a rollup for the pin at 14:47. Sami: “Oh no Owens didn’t win!”

Rating: C. Crews winning, even by shenanigans, is a good thing for him as he needs to establish himself as a bigger deal. Even as a former US Champion, Crews does not have the longest list of accomplishments in WWE. There is still time to rebuild him though, and pinning a former World Champion is a good way to start.

Post match Owens hits Crews with the Stunner but Azeez comes in with the Nigerian Nail to leave Owens….liquiding from the mouth. Sami comes in and dances over Owens.

Paul Heyman praises Cesaro, even saying he loves him in a professional way. Cesaro made a name for himself with just one name. Cesaro is Heyman’s favorite Cesaro, but when it comes to the challenge, here’s a spoiler: Reigns will give you his answer himself tonight.

Apollo Crews says if you listen, you can hear his royal ancestors celebrating him beating Kevin Owens. Let that sound stop anyone from thinking they can take the title from him. Big E. jumps him and shouts about how he isn’t done. Commander Azeez runs in to say he only left Crews for one second.

Believe it or not we get an Aleister Black vignette, with Black, wearing glasses, sitting on in a dark room on a throne, reading from a book called Tales Of The Dark Father. The first tale is about the dragon, featuring animation of the a woman being taken away from the narrator. Black talks about the people watching at home being the monsters and he is nothing like them. The people at home transform their children into even worse monsters. They should be scorched from the earth to make room for better things. This was certainly different, though I’m just shocked to see Black for the first time since October.

Dolph Ziggler and Robert Roode are split on who wins between the Alpha Academy and the Mysterios. The Street Profits come in for the staredown but here is Bayley to mock the tension. The guys leave and Bayley talks about her title shot against Bianca Belair at Wrestlemania Backlash.

Belair trained with her but now she thinks she doesn’t need Bayley. There was no thank you either, because Belair is selfish and spoiled. At Wrestlemania Backlash, Bayley is taking back the title and the top spot in the division. Montez Ford pops back in with his phone, including Belair on the other end. She heard what Bayley said and is on her way. That seems cool with Bayley.

Post break, Belair is in the back with Bayley, who gives her a nice congratulations on winning the title. Bayley has faced Sasha Banks many times before and knows how tough she is. Belair is stunned at how nice that was as Bayley leaves, only to come back and crack up laughing. This has been a very simple way to build the title match: Belair is the new champion and Bayley wants the title back. It doesn’t need to be anything more than that in this situation.

Rey Mysterio/Dominick Mysterio vs. Alpha Academy

Dominick starts with Otis and is run over in a hurry with the big shoulder. Otis throws him outside and takes out Rey as well to send us to an early break. Back with Gable working on Dominik’s arm and handing it back to Otis to run him over again. A little mocking of Rey sets up a running splash in the corner for two on Dominik. Gable grabs an armbar to make Dominik scream and even moves around with the hold on to keep things a little more interesting.

Some rolling suplexes have Dominik in more trouble but he flips out of the last one and brings Rey back in to clean house. Rey’s Code Red gets two on Gable, who is sent shoulder first into the post. They head to the corner where Gable’s super gutbuster is countered into a super hurricanrana (cool) for two. Dominik sends Gable into the barricade with a sliding sunset bomb (cool as well) and avoids an Otis charge to send him into the announcers’ table. The 619 into the frog splash finishes Gable at 10:18.

Rating: C. This is what the tag team division has been needing for a long time now: a new team being built up by winning some matches. You can all but guarantee the Mysterios will be the next challengers, likely at Backlash, and that is a fresh match with some interest. It really is that simple, but the tag division gets so little attention that it is easy to forget how it works.

Post match here are Cesaro and Daniel Bryan, who show some respect to the Mysterios and head to the ring to for Roman Reigns’ answer. Post break, Cesaro and Bryan call Reigns out for his answer. No Reigns, so they threaten to go to the back and get an answer. Cue a ticked off Reigns, who says the champ issues the challenges around here. That challenge is to Daniel Bryan for one more title shot next week. Cesaro says Bryan has to take it but Reigns has one more deal: if Bryan loses, he is done on Smackdown. Bryan accepts and Michael Cole gets in the big hype statements to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. I love a show that has a focus and then builds on that focus throughout the night. This show was ALL about Cesaro and Bryan trying to get an answer from Reigns but then we got a nice side trip on the road to Cesaro vs. Reigns. The storytelling was good and the wrestling backs it up, leaving you not lacking much. The rest of the show worked well too, with all of the other title pictures developing a bit. This show felt like it was well thought out and executed, which I can always appreciate. Pretty good show this week and they got a lot done.

Results

Daniel Bryan/Cesaro b. Jey Uso/Seth Rollins – Running knee to Uso

Tamina b. Nia Jax – Superkick

Apollo Crews b. Kevin Owens – Rollup

Rey Mysterio/Dominik Mysterio b. Alpha Academy – Frog splash to Gable

 

 

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Smackdown – April 16, 2021: Sometimes That’s Just As Important

Smackdown
Date: April 16, 2021
Location: Yuengling Center, Tampa, Florida
Commentators: Pat McAfee, Michael Cole

It’s the post Wrestlemania show and that means it could be time for a lot of things to take place. This show can be full of great stuff like NXT or it can be a complete waste of time like Raw. I’m not sure what to expect from the show but Smackdown has a good enough history to give me some hope. Let’s get to it.

Here are both nights of Wrestlemania if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of the Wrestlemania main event, with Roman Reigns defending the Universal Title against Edge and Daniel Bryan.

Here is Roman Reigns, flanked by Jey Uso and Paul Heyman. After looking around for a bit, Reigns has Heyman explain the kind of competition he had to face. Heyman explains who Daniel Bryan and Edge are, allowing Reigns to talk about how no one is on his level. He has done everything he was asked to do and stacked up the competition to pin them both at once. With that out of the way, cut the check and fire up the jet. Reigns goes to leave but here’s Cesaro to interrupt, which gets Reigns’ attention. He leaves anyway as Cesaro stares him all the way to Wrestlemania: Backlash.

Post break Cesaro comes up to Adam Pearce and Sonya Deville in the back to call Roman Reigns a son of a b****. Cesaro wants Reigns tonight, even if it means non-title. Sonya will get back to him.

We look at Cesaro busting out the UFO against Seth Rollins at Wrestlemania.

Otis vs. Rey Mysterio

Chad Gable and Dominik Mysterio are here too. Otis runs him over to start and tosses Rey down without much trouble. Rey gets sent outside but comes back in, where he is tied in the Tree of Woe. A missed charge gives Rey a breather and it’s a pair of running seated sentons for two. The springboard crossbody is countered into a World’s Strongest Slam but Otis misses the middle rope splash. The 619 sets up a middle rope crucifix (that’s a new one) for the pin on Otis at 2:58, assuming you ignore the space between Otis’ shoulder and the mat).

Heyman accepts Cesaro’s challenge on Reigns’ behalf. There was a rain delay at Wrestlemania but it wasn’t the rain. No instead it was the tears of God, weeping at what he had to see. You had Cesaro coming after the talented Seth Rollins and embarrassing him, so tonight let’s take care of all this for once and for all…..with Cesaro facing Jey Uso tonight.

We look at Cesaro beating Seth Rollins at Wrestlemania.

Here is Sami Zayn to rant about being screwed at Wrestlemania all over again. Logan Paul was supposed to be there to help with the documentary and expose everything but that isn’t how it happened. Instead, Paul’s mind was poisoned by everyone from management to the fans to Michael Cole, the corporate mouthpiece. Now he wants to face Kevin Owens again because there is nothing to distract him this time. Cue Owens and we take a break.

Kevin Owens vs. Sami Zayn

Sami bails to the floor to start so Owens follows him out for a ram into the announcers’ table. Back in and Sami snaps his throat across the top rope to take over. Right hands to the head have Owens in trouble and Sami gets to shout a lot, as he tends to do. Choking ensues in the corner and a jawbreaker cuts off Owens’ rather brief comeback attempt. Owens hits a clothesline to start the real comeback though and he puts Sami on top for some chops.

Sami is sat up top but comes back with a sunset bomb for two, which has McAfee VERY impressed. We take a break and come back with Sami charging into a superkick, setting up Owens’s Swanton for two. Owens can’t hit the Pop Up Powerbomb but he can block the half and half suplex. Owens’ fisherman’s buster onto the knee gets two and Sami has had enough opting for the countout at 9:38.

Rating: C. These two could fight in their sleep and have a decent match so this was good enough. The ending should keep things moving for them and that will be a fine way for both of them to go. I’m not sure where they are going next, though you can all but guarantee a special rematch at Backlash.

Post match Owens throws him back in for the Stunner to keep things going.

Apollo Crews brags about winning the Intercontinental Title and would give Big E. a rematch tonight….but Big E. isn’t here. On Sunday, Big E. ran into Commander Azeez and more violence is teased, with Crews dubbing the team the Nigerian Nail.

Here are the Street Profits to take part in Bianca Belair’s championship celebration. Back from a break with the Profits talking about how Wrestlemania was a night to remember but there was one match that stood out about the others. We get a video on Belair beating Sasha Banks to win the SmackDown Women’s Title, including the media attention that followed. Montez Ford talks about how special that was and brings out Belair to for the big presentation as champion.

Belair takes her time soaking in a loud EST chant and says she can’t believe she got here. If you told her she would be here with this title….well she probably would have said yes, because that is who she is. You should never apologize for being the b-e-s-t because if you can dream it, you can do it. Then there is Sasha Banks, who pushed her like no one ever has and both of them made history. They both did, but Belair is the champ. The title is for everyone who believed in her and they are just getting started creating history. They all hug but Belair tells Ford to get back to business, because it’s time to get some more gold.

In the back, Sasha Banks can’t say anything.

We look at Cesaro’s UFO to Seth Rollins again.

Bayley talks about how she was busy hosting the show while Belair was crying before the match. Is that the kind of role model you want? Of course not, so Bayley challenges Belair for a future title shot.

Tag Team Titles: Dolph Ziggler/Robert Roode vs. Street Profits

The Profits are challenging and Ziggler hits a dropkick on Dawkins to start. Ford comes in for a better dropkick and it’s time to start in on Ziggler’s arm. Everything breaks down and the Profits take over again, including a running bulldog to Roode. A lot of shouting into the camera takes us to a break. Back with Dawkins hitting a jumping back elbow to Roode’s face but Roode gets over to Ziggler.

The champs take over for a change, only to have Dawkins catapult Ziggler into the corner. The double tag brings in Ford and Roode as everything breaks down. Ford hits a standing moonsault for two on Roode, followed by the flip dive on the floor. Back in and the spinebuster sets up the frog splash for two with Ziggler making the diving save. The blind tag brings Ziggler back in and the Zig Zag to Ford retains the titles at 10:42.

Rating: C+. These guys work well together and they did that again here. This should end the Profits’ run at the titles for the moment, but I’m not sure who goes after the titles next. The Mysterios are about the only team left and that should be ok, though it isn’t exactly interesting. At least the titles are being defended a bit more frequently than the not at all from January until last week.

We look at the UFO to Rollins again.

Cesaro says Paul Heyman is right: he isn’t the biggest or the smartest, but he’s ready to go tonight.

Natalya vs. Shayna Baszler

Tamina and Nia Jax are here as well. They go to the floor to start with Shayna taking over and sending it back inside to work on Natalya’s arm. Natalya gets up and hits the discus clothesline with the good arm so Jax gets on the apron for a distraction. That fails for Baszler though as Natalya rolls her up for the pin at 2:30. So yes, not only did we have to sit through it at Wrestlemania but now we’re supposed to cheer for Natalya and Tamina as they are likely getting ANOTHER title shot at Backlash. While the IIconics are looking for their next gig. Because WWE. And the IIconics didn’t have the right parents or something.

Cesaro vs. Jey Uso

Uso sends him into the ropes to start but Cesaro gets in a quick slam to take over. Cesaro takes him to the apron and goes after Cesaro’s hand but gets knocked to the floor. The dive off of the apron drops Uso and we take a break. We come back with Uso work working on the arm to try and keep Cesaro down. Uso goes up but gets caught with a dropkick.

A gutwrench superplex gives Cesaro two and he cartwheels out of an armdrag. Cesaro nails a springboard uppercut and McAfee is rather impressed. Uso is back with a pop up neckbreaker for two but Cesaro nails a discus lariat. The Swing goes on but here is Seth Rollins to jump Cesaro for the DQ at 11:10.

Rating: C+. Good enough while it lasted but they telegraphed the ending the entire night with the UFO clip. That isn’t a terrible thing, but it also didn’t give us the most drama. Cesaro is looking primed for a one off shot against Reigns, but it also might be better to have him beat Rollins again first. Reigns isn’t going to lose to Cesaro, so building him up a bit more first is a good way to make Wrestlemania not seem like a fluke.

Post match Rollins lays him out and shouts that Cesaro got lucky. The sooner Cesaro figures that out, the better it is for him.

Overall Rating: C. This show was not their best and didn’t include any major post Wrestlemania moments, but it also stayed focused on a few stories and built them up. More importantly though there was also nothing terrible (save for the idea of Natalya and Tamina continuing to chase the titles), and that makes all the difference from Raw. Sometimes not being bad is enough and that was the case here, as you can see the setup for Wrestlemania Night Three coming together already. Not a great show, but an efficient enough one.

Results

Rey Mysterio b. Otis – Crucifix

Kevin Owens b. Sami Zayn via countout

Dolph Ziggler/Robert Roode b. Street Profits – Zig Zag to Ford

Natalya b. Shayna Baszler – Rollup

Cesaro b. Jey Uso via DQ when Seth Rollins interfered

 

 

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Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania XXXVI Night Two (Original): They Did It Fast

Wrestlemania XXXVI Night Two
Date: April 5, 2020
Location: WWE Performance Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton, Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re back for more of the same and that might not be the worst thing in the world. Last night’s part one wasn’t half bad but they are going to have a hard time surpassing that main event. There are eight more matches, plus the required Kickoff Show match, tonight so hopefully they can have another good one. Let’s get to it.

Here are last night’s results if you need a recap.

Kickoff Show: Liv Morgan vs. Natalya

Morgan rolls her up for two to start so Natalya does the same for a standoff. Some more rollups get some more near falls until Morgan sends her into the corner. A running hip attack hits Natalya but she’s right back with her basement dropkick for two more. Natalya clotheslines her to the floor, followed by the surfboard back inside. Natalya: “ASK HER!!!!” That’s broken up and Liv’s Codebreaker gets two. The sitout wheelbarrow faceplant gives Natalya the same and they pinfall reversal sequence with Liv getting the pin at 6:33.

Rating: D+. Imagine that: a Natalya match being technically fine but completely emotionless. That’s been the definition of her career for years now and I don’t see it changing anytime soon. Liv getting a win is fine but there is no way that she is getting anywhere near the top of the division, leaving this as little more than a way to fill time.

Stephanie McMahon welcomes us to the show in a new message.

Same opening video as last night.

Rob Gronkowski welcomes us to the show and throws us to the first match.

NXT Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Rhea Ripley

Ripley is defending. The feel each other out to start with Charlotte going straight to the leg. That doesn’t work so Rhea gets in her face, earning some chops into the corner. Ripley is right back with Riptide for two and it’s time for a quick breather. They fight to the floor with Charlotte hitting a double chop but Rhea sends her into the steps. Back in and Rhea hits a dropkick before kicking away at the ribs.

A bodyscissors keeps Charlotte down but Rhea misses a running big boot and hurts her leg on the rope. Charlotte works on the leg, shrugs off a shot to the head, and bends the leg around on the mat. Rhea won’t quit so Charlotte works on the leg again. Back up and Rhea nails a basement dropkick, followed by some shouting at her own knee. The leg is fine enough for an electric chair faceplant for two, followed by a missile dropkick for the same, albeit after a delay because of the knee.

Charlotte chop blocks the knee though and Rhea is down again. The Figure Four doesn’t work again and Rhea reverses into the standing Cloverleaf. That’s broken up as well and Charlott knocks her down with another hard shot. The Figure Four is broken up again so Charlotte goes with a Boston crab instead.

Ripley gets out again and hits a quick big boot (thanks to some editing) for the double knockdown. Rhea takes her up top but gets slammed back down, though she’s able to raise her boots to block the moonsault. A horrible looking spear gives Charlotte two but the Figure Four finally goes on. The Figure Eight makes Ripley tap at 20:26.

Rating: C+. CHARLOTTE! WINS!! AGAIN!!! I have no idea why they needed to have her beat Rhea clean in their first match but I’m sure it has something to do with some kind of tribute to Ric Flair, who hasn’t had one in a while. I’m sick of seeing Charlotte with a title and it almost scares me to imagine how many titles she’s going to wind up with in the end.

We recap last night.

Aleister Black vs. Bobby Lashley

Lana is here with Lashley. Black gets tossed around to start and Lashley hammers away, only to get low bridged to the floor. A running big boot puts Lashley on the floor but Black misses the moonsault. Lashley snaps off the overhead belly to belly but can’t get a suplex back inside. Instead Black kicks him in the chest, only to walk into a snap powerslam for two. Another suplex gets another two and Lashley loads up the Dominator, but Lana tells him to do the spear. That earns him Black Mass for the sudden pin at 7:14.

Rating: D+. This was a way to get Black on the show, and by that I mean a way for him to get beaten up until Lana and Lana alone cost Lashley the match. I’m glad Black won but if you want him to look good, just have him kick Lashley’s head off and win. It’s not like Lashley has anything going on at the moment, but now I’m sure we can get the big fallout with Lana now, because we need another part to that story.

Bayley complains about the elimination match and knows Sasha Banks won’t turn on her. With Bayley gone, Sasha is asked how much she wants to win the title. You’ll have to watch and see.

Money in the Bank ad.

Gronk would like to win the 24/7 Title.

We recap Otis vs. Dolph Ziggler. Otis was going to go on a Valentine’s Day date with Mandy Rose but Ziggler crashed it when Otis was late. Mandy wanted nothing else to do with Otis after that but it turns out that Sonya Deville stole Mandy’s phone and told Otis she would be late (and deleted the texts) so it would fall apart.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Otis

Sonya Deville is here with Ziggler. Otis misses a charge to start and gets superkicked outside in a hurry. That gets one back inside so Ziggler grabs a neckbreaker into the jumping elbow for two. The chinlock goes on but Otis is back up with a catapult. A hard whip sends Ziggler into the corner and a pop up World’s Strongest Slam plants him again. Sonya gets on the apron for a distraction though and Ziggler gets in a low blow. Cue Mandy to take out Sonya and hit Ziggler low, setting up the Caterpillar for the pin at 8:23.

Rating: D+. I was wrong on this one as I didn’t think they would let Otis pin Dolph. I’m rather please by the result and even though it wasn’t much of a match, at least they pulled the trigger on something. You can pencil in the mixed tag coming up and that’s all well and good, though I’m not sure where they can go after that.

Post match Otis picks Mandy up and they get the first kiss.

We recap Edge vs. Randy Orton. Edge came back at the Royal Rumble but Orton attacked him the next night and put him back on the shelf. Orton said Edge was an adrenaline junkie and he attacked him so Edge wouldn’t ruin his life like Orton did. To make it worse, Orton RKOed Edge’s wife (who is a Hall of Famer who wrestled earlier this year so we needed to act like he shot her). Now it’s a Last Man Standing match as this is very personal.

Edge vs. Randy Orton

Last Man Standing. Edge comes out first and glares at the stage for Orton….who is disguised as a cameraman and runs in for an RKO before the bell. The bell rings and it’s another RKO but Edge falls to the floor at nine. They fight back backstage with Orton knocking Edge through some doors. It goes onto the gym with Orton knocking him down again, setting up some choking with a rope on a machine.

Edge gets out and hits a dropkick through some machines before choking away at Orton. Some forearms put Orton in a chair and Edge pulls himself up on a bar for a seated senton of all things. Back up and they slug it out into another room with a red light. Both guys are sent face first into a garage door and it’s back into the arena. Orton shoves him off a platform and into the barricade before they stumble backstage again.

Edge’s head gets bounced off of another wall for a six count and it’s time to go into the office area. This time it’s Orton being sent into a wall but Edge kicks him in the ribs at nine. Orton gets thrown onto the big table so Edge pulls himself up onto part of the ceiling to drop an elbow. The cameraman gets knocked down but another one catches them up in the big storage facility in the back.

Both of them bounce off of various things until Orton knocks him onto a storage crate. Edge gets sent into some steps and Orton starts looking around. That’s good for another nine so they wind up in what looks like the promo area. Edge throws something at Orton’s leg to take him down and some more shots to the face do it again. Orton is placed on a table and drops a huge elbow.

They go to a truck with a cover on the bed and Orton hits the hanging DDT for nine. Edge climbs onto some crates and then on top of an NXT semi truck. Orton and the referee follow them up and it’s a spear to drop Orton. That’s good for nine but another spear is countered into an RKO.

Edge is up at nine as well but Orton has dropped down to the floor next to the biggest ladder I’ve ever seen in WWE (it’s on the floor and is WAY higher than the top of the semi truck). Instead Orton takes some chairs up to the top of the truck to load up the Conchairto. Edge grabs a head and arm choke though and Orton is out. Hold on though as Edge waves off the count so he can hit the Conchairto. Orton is finally done at 36:39.

Rating: B. This one is going to be divisive and I can understand that. If my math is right, this was the longest non-Iron Man match in Wrestlemania history, though it didn’t feel that long. It felt like two guys who wanted to hurt each other and were doing whatever they could to accomplish that. I liked the unique atmosphere and some of the spot, with the Conchairto making for a good finish.

After a quick breather, here’s Mojo Rawley with the Mob chasing him. Gronk shows up and dives off a platform to take out the pile, allowing him to pin Rawley for the title.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Street Profits vs. Austin Theory/Angel Garza

The Profits are defending. Dawkins shoulders Theory down to start and the champs start working on the arm. That’s fine with Theory, who sends Dawkins to the floor, allowing Theory to mock the dancing. Garza gets in a superkick on the floor, TAKES OFF HIS PANTS, and misses a clothesline so Dawkins can tag Ford in.

A DDT gets two on Ford and Garza hits the moonsault onto both champs on the floor. The Lionsault gets two more on Ford back inside but Ford pops up with an enziguri. Dawkins comes in and runs Garza over, only to get caught in Theory’s TKO. Ford frog splashes his way in for the save though and Dawkins gets the cover to retain at 6:23.

Rating: D+. If ever there was a match to cut for the sake of time. This was a weird one as there was no reason to believe the title change was taking place and then the finish felt like something the heels would do to win. There are no teams to challenge the Profits at the moment and I don’t see Theory and Garza changing that anytime soon.

Post match Garza and Theory stay on Ford but Bianca Belair runs in for the save. That means a KOD on Zelina.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Lacey Evans vs. Tamina vs. Naomi vs. Sasha Banks vs. Bayley

Bayley is defending and this is under elimination rules. Tamina shrugs off the gang attack to start so Lacey chop blocks her down. The other four slug it out with Bayley and Sasha double teaming Lacey. Naomi makes a quick save as a mini tag match breaks out. Tamina comes back in to run everyone over and we actually get a Team Bad reunion. That lasts for all of three seconds as everyone goes after Tamina, including something off the top each. A dog pile pin gets rid of Tamina at 6:23.

Naomi dives onto Sasha but Lacey misses a dive onto Bayley, earning a ram into the steps. A sunset flip gives Naomi two on Bayley and Sasha at the same time, followed by a sliding slip to both. The Rear View hits Sasha and a Bubba Bomb into the reverse Rings of Saturn….is broken up by Bayley. The Bank Statement gets rid of Naomi (Bayley: “DANCE TO THE BACK!”) at 10:36 and we’re down to three.

Bayley shouts about Lacey’s daughter though, allowing Lacey to avoid the running knee. Sasha is knocked silly instead so Lacey small packages Bayley for two. Back in and Sasha yells at Bayley, who shoves Sasha out of the way of the Woman’s Right. Lacey hits the second attempt though and Banks is done at 13:23.

After a replay where you can hear Cole shouting commentary, Bayley mocks Lacey with a salute and shoves her face against the rope. Lacey gets posted for two so Bayley ties her arm to the corner with the tag rope. Since that’s kind of a stupid plan, Lacey kicks her way out and hits the slingshot Bronco Busters in the corner. After a slow motion salute, Lacey’s double jump moonsault gets two. Cue Sasha with a Backstabber to Lacey though and Bayley’s weird bulldog driver retains at 19:15.

Rating: D. Well that was long and served little purpose. Bayley has held the title since last May (save for a four day Charlotte reign) and I’m not sure what else there is for her to do. Unless they do Bayley vs. Becky (unlikely), what is the point in keeping it on her much longer? I’m sure we’ll get to Bayley vs. Banks again eventually, but dang that sounds as appealing as watching this match all over again.

Titus O’Neil takes Gronk’s place as host.

Wrestlemania XXXVII is in Los Angeles.

We recap The Fiend vs. John Cena in the Firefly Fun House. After Cena said that he didn’t want to wrestle at this year’s show, Fiend popped up to challenge him. Cena accepted, and then Bray Wyatt went on to say that he blamed Cena for the rise of the Fiend. See, Cena beat him at Wrestlemania XXX and messed with Bray’s mind, leading to the creation of the Fiend. Therefore, tonight Cena goes to the Fun House.

John Cena vs. The Fiend

Cena makes his entrance but the Firefly Fun House pops up, with Bray saying that Cena is about to face himself. Then Cena is teleported to the Fun House (apparently the same way Seth Rollins got there back in October), where Ramblin Rabbit sends him through a door after the Fiend. Cena follows and finds the Vince puppet, asking if Cena has the ruthless aggression to make it in this company.

We see Wyatt copying the Kurt Angle promo to challenge Cena from 2002 and here’s 2020 Cena in 2002 Cena attire. Cena keeps saying RUTHLESS AGGRESSION but misses a bunch of shots. Bray: “You can look but you can’t touch!” And now it’s the Saturday Night’s Main Event opening, with Bray standing behind a cage and imitating Hulk Hogan. Cena (Johnny Largemeat) comes up and starts rapidly lifting weights, apparently destroying his arms in the process.

Vince and the Mercy the Buzzard are on commentary as Bray asks what happens when Cena realizes that Ego Mania has been running wild on him. Bray sends him off camera to the Smackdown Fist where Cena is the Dr. of Thugnomics, with Bray dancing to Basic Thuganomics. They’re back in the ring and Cena finds out that he can only speak in rhymes, including a Husky Harris reference.

Bray calls Cena a bully and a horrible person who takes the weaknesses of others and turns them into jokes. With that, Bray gives him the floor so Cena throws him Deez Nuts. Cena, in the Babe Ruth jersey from last year, misses a charge and gets knocked out by a chain. Now it’s Bray back in the Wyatt Family gear and sitting in the rocking chair as we see clips of Wrestlemania XXX.

The fans wanted and needed him that night and now it’s time to rewrite his own story. They’re back in the ring now with Bray dancing with the unconscious Cena and loading up Sister Abigail. He lets Cena go though and drops down, handing Cena a chair in a recreation of Wrestlemania XXX. Bray tells Cena to fix his mistake from last year but Bray disappears away from Cena’s swing.

And now it’s…..NWO MONDAY NITRO??? Bray is Eric Bischoff (with the jacket and a Wolfpac shirt) and introduces Cena as Hollywood Hogan. Cena takes Bray down and unloads as we see clips of Cena’s past. He wakes up as himself and sees that he’s beating up Huskus the Pig. The Fiend appears behind him and gives him the Mandible Claw to knock Cena out. We hear Cena’s promo about ending the most overrated overhyped superstar ever and the Claw goes back on with Bray counting the pin. Cena teleports away and the Fiend stands alone.

No rating as this wasn’t a match but I got into this. It’s a rather interesting character study of Cena and you can get what they’re going with in Fiend making him face his fears. Back in the day, CM Punk said that Cena had become the New York Yankees: the big bad who held people down and used money to get what he wants (or going from the Real American Hogan to Hollywood Hogan as they used here).

That’s what Fiend is showing Cena here and it scared Cena that he had changed so much and become what he fought against for so many years. Now granted, if you haven’t been glued to WWE for the last….oh eight years or so, this made no sense, but the effort and thought was ALL there and I got most of what they were going for, plus some of the complete insanity that went along with it. Not a match, but kind of a fascinating weird look into the WWE psyche.

We cut to Titus O’Neil. Titus: “I don’t know what I just saw.”

We recap Brock Lesnar vs. Drew McIntyre. Lesnar is World Champion but Drew eliminated him from the Royal Rumble and then won the whole thing, earning him this spot. Drew has kicked his head off a few times since then to show he can hang with Brock.

Raw World Title: Drew McIntyre vs. Brock Lesnar

Lesnar is defending and gets Claymored for two after about ten seconds. Another Claymore misses and it’s time to go to Suplex City. The F5 gets one and Brock isn’t happy. Another F5 gets two and there’s the third for another two. Another F5 is countered and McIntyre hits two more Claymores. A fourth gives Drew the pin and the title at 4:28.

Rating: D. I’m happy that McIntyre won but GOOD GRIEF STOP DOING THAT SAME MATCH OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER! It’s a cool idea one time and then don’t do it again for years. This is all Lesnar does anymore and now it’s creeping over into other main events too. It loses its impact when they keep doing it again and again and now you’ve grown to expect it every time. Anyway, great moment to end the show and McIntyre as champion is awesome, assuming they don’t have Lesnar win it back in two months again.

Overall Rating: C-. I didn’t like this one as much as last night’s but it still wasn’t terrible. This one definitely felt like the bigger show and had the more intriguing matches (for the most part). I’m not wild on some of the booking decisions but it felt more like a Wrestlemania and that’s what matters. The crowd being gone didn’t bother me as much either, but the wrestling itself just wasn’t as good. Overall, not bad but last night’s felt tighter and more enjoyable.

Overall Overall Rating: C. With something like this, it’s almost impossible to give the thing a fair rating. When you factor in the day in between and the weird atmosphere, the show was pretty much just ok. There were some very good matches but some that made me wonder why I was wasting my time. Overall it’s an enjoyable one off, but I’m still not behind the idea of a two night Wrestlemania going forward. Until WWE can cut these things WAY down and trim off so much of the unnecessary stuff, it needs to be one night and one night only, just for the sake of sanity if nothing else.

Results

Charlotte b. Rhea Ripley – Figure Eight

Aleister Black b. Bobby Lashley – Black Mass

Otis b. Dolph Ziggler – Caterpillar

Edge b. Randy Orton when Orton couldn’t answer the ten count

Street Profits b. Angel Garza/Austin Theory – Frog splash to Theory

Bayley b. Sasha Banks, Naomi, Tamina and Lacey Evans – Bulldog driver to Evans

Drew McIntyre b. Brock Lesnar – Claymore

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