NWA Weekly PPV #9
Date: August 14, 2002
Location: Tennessee State Fairgrounds, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Don West, Ed Ferrara

I really need to do these more often. Things have been a total mess around here, which is kind of the trademark of the promotion in its early run. Ron Killings has won the World Title and Don Harris is at war with the New Church because…I have absolutely no idea. Jeff Jarrett is still the star of the whole place while the X-Division guys continue to steal the show week in and week out. Let’s get to it.

Opening recap, looking at last week’s World Title change.

Opening sequence.

Here is new World Champion Ron Killings for a chat. Killings says this is his house, which he dubs the TNA Asylum. He has had to work harder because of the color of his skin. A senior WWF official told him that he couldn’t make the same mistakes as a white man. That’s too far, so from this day forward, he is a legend. Now he’s the World Champion, but here is Jeff Jarrett (teaming with Killings tonight) to say he can’t believe some of this nonsense.

Jarrett claims reverse racism because he has never gotten the same shot. Killings says come get your shot but cue Bill Behrens (with a ridiculous cowboy hat) and security to cut it off. Behrens makes a bunch of sheriff jokes and says Jarrett and Killings fan fight…but it won’t be sanctioned for the World Title. Cue Brian Lawler to go after Jarrett until security breaks it up. Lawler shouts about knowing it was Jarrett. Well of course it was. It’s always Jarrett.

Kid Kash/Shark Boy/Slim J vs. Amazing Red/Spanish Announce Team

Kash and Joel start fast and trade wrist control before exchanging armdrags for a standoff in a quick sequence. Kash flips him off and hits a running shoulder before backdropping him out to the floor. A slingshot hurricanrana takes Joel down again and we hit the parade of dives. J, Red and Kash all one up each other with flip dives and we settle down to Kash suplexing J onto Joel. Back up and everything breaks down, with the SAT’s tying up Boy and J in a Liontamer/camel clutch at the same time.

Red adds a springboard missile dropkick but gets kicked in the face by J. Kash comes back in to drop an elbow on Red and then hits a kind of super powerslam. It’s back to J, who misses a twisting top rope splash. Everything breaks down (shocking I know) and Kash runs the corner for a super hurricanrana. Boy’s Diamond Dust gets two on Red with Jose making the save. The Money Maker (Jay Driller) plants Red with Joel’s top rope legdrop breaking it up. The double super Spanish Fly hits J and Red’s very twisty splash finishes him off at 10:39.

Rating: B. This falls right into the classic formula of “take a bunch of people and let them fly all over the place to pop the crowd”. That’s all this was supposed to be and it was entertaining stuff. Red’s stuff continues to be insane and that was the case here, with Kash’s great looking hurricanranas not being too far behind.

The Dupps have an idea for their own version of Cribs, which is about their house…which is an outhouse. My goodness this is so dumb.

Here is Bruce to say he is more woman than anyone in this arena. All of the married men in this arena, including Mike Tenay, are fantasizing about him. The challenge is on, and he’ll throw in $5000 to any woman who can beat him. A woman from the crowd signs a quick contract and we’re ready to go.

Miss TNA: Bruce vs. ???

Bruce is defending and gets speared down to start, followed by a legdrop. A toss over the top sets up a slam on the floor, followed by another back inside. Then Bruce grabs a small package for the fast pin at 1:50. The woman shrugs it off with an “oh well”, because that’s what you should do here.

Jeff Jarrett wants the World Title and beats up Bill Behrens in the backroom. Then he runs into Low Ki for a staredown, followed by Tito and Bo Dupp bumping into each other. Thankfully for us, this means a match.

Don Harris vs. Malice

Last Man Standing and this is missing from WatchTNA because…well I’m guessing the SS on Harris’ shirt. Malice jumps him to start and gets taken down for his efforts. Harris chairs him in the head but Malice throws powder in Harris’ eyes. More powder blinds Harris again and Malice gets in a chair shot as Harris is busted open. Malice whips him into the barricade a few times and they go up to the stage, with Harris being tossed out to the floor.

That’s a bit too much selling for Harris though, as he comes back with a chain for some choking and a clothesline. It’s time for a table and Harris kicks a chair into Malice’s face. Malice gets in a powerbomb but pulls Harris up for a chokeslam. That’s countered into a DDT but Malice is back up with a belly to back superplex through the table. Naturally only Harris gets up for the win at 7:08.

Rating: D. If you have a Last Man Standing match, maybe A, have it go longer than ten minutes and B, don’t have the SECURITY GUARD beat the former #1 contender to the World Title. The fact that Malice hit the finishing move here and then lost anyway should tell you everything wrong with this match, but there was so much else wrong with the thing that it’s not even covering the biggest issue. Horrible stuff here as Don Harris continues to be far too big of a star.

Post match respect is shown, and if you have the respect of DON HARRIS, you’re going places.

Dupp Cup: Teo vs. Bo Dupp

The first to ten points wins and if you think I’m keeping score, I have no idea what to tell you. Teo starts fast and sends him into a chair, followed by ripping off the pants and hitting him with a stick horse. It doesn’t count for points though because Bo likes it and yes, someone was paid to come up with this nonsense.

Stan Dupp offers a distraction and Bo gets in a big boot as Don West is actually trying to keep track of the points (doing commentary with a solo mic at ringside, reportedly because Mike Tenay didn’t want to be part of this). Stan goes to the ticket window where the woman in charge beats on him with a broom. Bo takes Teo to the outhouse but Puppet is inside with a kendo stick. That’s enough for Bo to be send face first into the hole to give Teo the win at 4:25.

Rating: F-. I…what do you want me to say here? This was every bit as stupid as you could have imagined and then it just kept getting worse. I’m sure the people backstage were roaring with laughter over it, but if your commentator, and one of the most prominent, well respected people you have, is washing your hands so you can do an outhouse joke, it’s way past time to think about what you’re doing.

We recap Monty Brown vs. Elix Skipper, with Skipper turning on him (after they won a match) and Brown wanting revenge.

Monty Brown vs. Elix Skipper

Detroit Street Fight. Before the match, Skipper calls out Brown for the fight and then gets jumped from behind because Skipper is kind of dumb. Brown hammers away to start and chokes him over the ropes with a shirt. Skipper gets in a chain shot to the ribs and chokes away, which is shrugged off without much effort.

Back in and some trashcan/lid shots slow Brown down, with Skipper adding in a Matrix to send Brown crashing. A slingshot dive onto the can onto Brown gets two on the floor but Brown is back up with the Alphalution (kind of a reverse F5). The Alpha Bomb onto a trashcan (onto a stop sign because reasons) finishes Skipper at 5:45.

Rating: C. I can go with pushing Brown as a star as he has more charisma than should be allowed, but this was another violent gimmick match crammed into way too short of a time limit. As is the case so often around here, this stuff needs time to breathe and that isn’t what we’re getting with just about anything. Brown is going to be a force though, as even TNA shouldn’t be able to screw him up.

The Flying Elvises are all ready to challenge for the X-Division Title. They’re fired up because it’s 25 years since Elvis died and Sonny Siaki is going to win the title in his honor. As in his own honor, because he hates Elvis. Hence being in a stable called the FLYING ELVISES. Other than that, I’m trying to figure out why Goldilocks is in her third different outfit in an hour.

X-Division Title: Low Ki vs. Sonny Siaki vs. Jimmy Yang vs. Jorge Estrada

Ki is defending and this is elimination rules. Siaki and Ki start things off as we’re actually tagging here. Ki fights him into the corner early on but gets powerbombed out. Estrada comes in and grabs a Regal Roll but the Lionsault is countered. Some kicks rock Estrada for two, with Siaki having to break up a dragon sleeper.

The Elvises aren’t happy with each other so Yang comes in with a middle rope spinwheel kick. Yang chokes him over the ropes but Ki is quickly out of a sleeper. Estrada comes back in and takes out Yang, including a springboard flip dive on the floor. Back in and Yang hits a dropkick into a Boston crab, which he bends back really fast and Estrada taps immediately for the elimination at 6:41.

Ki comes in so Yang hits him with a missile dropkick for two. Yang Time is loaded up but Siaki crotches him down, setting up the Ki Crusher at 7:56 to get us down to one on one. Siaki comes in with a pop up cutter for two but Ki is back with a springboard kick to the face. Siaki manages a shot to the face, only to get sent into Yang as he’s still on the apron. Ki rolls him up to retain at 9:22.

Rating: B-. They only had so much time here as you had three eliminated to cover in the span of less than ten minutes. At the same time, the Elvises are having issues and that’s likely going to lead to something going south sooner or later. As for Ki, it’s a good move to have him beat all three members of the team to retain, as that’s going to make anyone look strong.

Earlier today, Goldilocks (outfit #4) got in a car with Jerry Lynn, who made a short drive to another building and beat up AJ Styles, knocking him into a bathtub and demanding respect.

Disco Inferno is back with Jive Talking and brings out actor Dean Baldwin (read as Shark Boy without a mask) to talk about his upcoming movie. This leads Disco to asking about Alec Baldwin and Kim Basinger’s bedroom habits. Cue Brian Lawler who rants about Jeff Jarrett doing…something. Baldwin: “Who are you? What are your credentials?” Lawler takes Baldwin out and we still don’t know what Jarrett did. Security throws Lawler out.

Goldilocks (outfit #5) watches the Dupps freak out. Stan is leaving and Goldilocks isn’t sure what Bo should do. Bo: “Thank you for caring.”

Tag Team Titles: Jeff Jarrett/Ron Killings vs. AJ Styles/Jerry Lynn

Styles and Lynn are defending but Styles isn’t here to start. That means Lynn gets beaten down but here is Styles to even things up. House is cleaned and Styles hits Jarrett with the drop down dropkick for an early two. A Lionsault to the floor connects for Styles but he gets dropped onto the barricade. That leaves Lynn to monkey flip Killings inside and a middle rope bulldog gets two.

We settle down to Jarrett stomping away on Lynn and Killings comes in for a wheelbarrow faceplant. The ax kick gets two on Lynn, who is right back with the Figure Four to Jarrett, who turns it over in literally less than two seconds. Since this is TNA, commentary insults Lynn for being dumb for trying a Figure Four on Jeff Jarrett.

Killings puts Lynn on top but gets taken down with a tornado DDT for a needed breather. That’s enough for the tag off to Styles so house can be cleaned. Everything breaks down and Styles flips over Jarrett but the referee gets decked. Lynn’s reverse DDT drops Jarrett and Cradle Piledrives Killings but Jarrett is up for the save. Jarrett gives Lynn the Stroke and Styles his the Spiral Tap on Killings for a double pin at 12:24.

Rating: C+. Oh there it is. That’s the big ending that Russo loves as not only do we have the two teams who don’t get along, but now they have a screwy finish to hold up the titles. Odds are we’ll either get a rematch, a ladder match or a tournament of some kind because it gets the titles off of Lynn and Styles without having them lose. It’s not a bad match, but dang it feels like a lame way to end the title reign.

Post match Bob Armstrong comes out to say the titles are held up. Next week, it’s Killings for Monty Brown for the World Title and Lynn vs. Styles for a future X-Division Title shot match. Lynn wants falls count anywhere. Styles wants anything goes. Armstrong says sure, and it’s going to be 2/3 falls, with the third fall being a ten minute iron man match. As for Jarrett, he gets a special opponent next week.

Don West does the big push for next week’s show.

Brian Lawler attacks Jeff Jarrett in the back and shouts about wanting to kill him. Geez what did he do? Make him watch Jeff Jarrett matches?

Overall Rating: D. As usual, the matches where it’s played a lot straighter are far easier to watch. Case in point, we had something as simple as a six man tag as the opener and it was by far the best thing on the show. After that, it was man vs. woman, a Last Man Standing match, the Dupp Cup nonsense, a street fight and then a four way before a screwy tag match to wrap up the show. That’s WAY too much going on at once (including ANYTHING involving the Dupps) and some of it is absolutely horrible. There are fun parts to the show but as usual, they’re all so bogged down and it’s killing the positives. As per Russo.

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NWA TNA Weekly PPV #8
Date: August 7, 2002
Location: Tennessee State Fairgrounds, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Ed Ferrara, Don West

I keep thinking that these shows might get a bit better and that seems to be my problem. Most of the time, wrestling companies start to figure things out and the booking gets better, but this is Vince Russo’s TNA and things don’t get better around here. The big story this week is Ron Killings getting a World Title shot against Ken Shamrock so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Apollo and the Dupps are outside Ricky Steamboat’s office.

Amazing Red/Spanish Announce Team vs. Flying Elvises

It’s a brawl to start until Siaki is left alone to clothesline Red. Jose Maximo (brother of Joel) gets triple powerbombed and the Elvises get to pose and dance. For some reason Yang and Estrada go to commentary, leaving Siaki to get triple teamed in the corner. Then they sing a little Elvis as a surfboard/dragon sleeper combination sets up a top rope double stomp for two on Siaki.

Back up and Siaki fights back but he doesn’t want a tag from Yang. Red kicks Siaki down on top and it’s a double super Spanish Fly for two. Yang and Estrada come back in and take out the Maximos but Estrada gets caught in Code Red for two more. Estrada counters a double super Spanish Fly into a double super DDT to the Maximos. A top rope legdrop/splash combination hits Red but the other Elvises pose, allowing Siaki to steal the pin at 11:46.

Rating: B-. Oh that’s a Russo trait if I’ve ever seen one. You have the team who doesn’t get along but wins anyway, making the other team look that much worse. If Red and the SAT’s can’t beat Siaki when they have him 3-1, why should I believe they can beat pretty much anyone? It’s a bad idea and something that Russo absolutely loved, which shouldn’t be all that surprising.

We run down tonight’s card.

Apollo is mad at being left out of the World Title picture because it’s a show of disrespect. Why is Ron Killings getting the shot over him? Apollo accuses Ricky Steamboat of being corrupt (Mike Tenay is STUNNED) and promises to do something about it.

AJ Styles leaves Steamboat’s office and Apollo confronts Steamboat, who will talk to him on his own time. With that done, Jerry Lynn jumps Styles and a big fight breaks out before their match tonight.

Steamboat comes to the ring but the Dupps interrupt him. Steamboat isn’t having this and sends them to the back, telling them to do whatever they wanted. Oh that does not sound smart Dragon.

NWA World Title: Ron Killings vs. Ken Shamrock

Shamrock is defending and Steamboat is on commentary. Shamrock goes for the leg and Killings goes straight to the rope. A kick to the chest takes Killings down again as Steamboat talks about “them” holding him away from the WWF Title in 1987. Killings takes him down into a chinlock but gets pulled into a quickly broken kneebar. Back up and they collide for a double knockdown before Shamrock grabs a slow motion hurricanrana.

The ankle lock is broken up again as the Disciples Of The New Church are watching from the stage. Monty Brown comes out to watch as well as Shamrock hammers away and grabs a cross armbreaker (with Killings just laying there). They fight to the floor and (deep breath), Apollo, the Disciples Of The New Church, Don Harris, Monty Brown and Ricky Steamboat get into it with them. Apollo superkicks Shamrock by mistake and Steamboat throws him inside, where Killings hits a cutter for the pin and the title at 9:20.

Rating: D+. The match was a mess (believe it or not with that many people interfering) but it’s also the right move. Killings has at least been featured somewhat regularly while Shamrock has been this guy kind of off to the side who happened to be World Champion. Shifting the title to someone who is a lot more active and important is a good thing, even if it was as messy of a way to get the title off of him as possible. It didn’t help that the match was bad too, with the two of them having completely different styles which did not click whatsoever.

Post match Steamboat gets in the ring to call out Apollo, because THE WORLD TITLE CHANGING HANDS (and Killings becoming the first Black man to win the title) isn’t important enough to warrant a few moments to breathe. Steamboat grants Apollo a title shot, but, say it with me, Jeff Jarrett comes out to complain. Jarrett says he’s not getting the title shot because he’s white, because a Black man is champion and a Puerto Rican is getting the title shot (oh dear). Steamboat is tired of this (preach it) and makes a #1 contenders match with himself as guest referee for tonight.

And now, Jive Talkin with Disco Inferno but someone has stolen his set. Cue the Dupps to announce the Dupp Cup Invitational, which is for a family cup that they have used for moonshine over the years. This is the new hardcore division and they’re doing it because Ricky Steamboat said do whatever they want. They bring out a chalkboard with rules on it, saying you have to score ten points to win the match (this is going to be really, really stupid). We even have scoring options (and yes, they go over EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM):

Put an opponent through a table: 2.5 points
Put an opponent through a burning “tabel” (that’s how it’s spelled: 5 points
Put an opponent’s head in a toilet: 2.5 points
Put an opponent’s head in a toilet with waste in it: 3.5 points
Goose a woman: 2.5 points
Goose a man: 3.5 points
Hit Jeremy Borash: 2.5 points
Hit the ticket lady: 2.5 points
Use a farm animal of any kind in any way: 2.5 points

Note that at this point we cut to a fan with her hand over her mouth and a horrified look on her face. This is about as appropriate as anything you will ever see in wrestling.

Spank an opponent’s bare a** with “Horsey Poo” (a stick horse): 2.5 points
If the opponent likes it: -2.5 points
Introduce an opponent to Jai: 2.5 points (no, they do not specify who or what Jai is)
Cry like a pu**y: – 5 points
Put your opponent’s head in a cotton candy machine for one full rotation: 10 points, automatic win

In case that’s not enough, Disco starts suggesting his own scoring idea, such as using a weapon from a fan for 5 points, but the Dupps say that’s just 1. We’re going to even have the first match, with Bo Dupp defending the honor of his “girlfriend” Goldilocks. They offer 64 cents but then add in a night with Fluff Dupp…which is enough for Ed Ferrara to accept. He even gets a 2 point head start by decking Jeremy Borash. Then he jumps West and gets in a fight with Borash, which somehow makes it 6-0 as I guess this is a match.

Dupp Cup: Bo Dupp vs. Ed Ferrara

First to ten points wins and Ferrara is up 6-0. The Dupps chair him down a few times to make it 6-2 and more weapon shots make it 6-5 in a hurry. A blowup doll is brought in as this somehow gets dumber. Stan goes after the ticket lady, who comes out of her office with a broom to beat him up.

Paulina From Tough Enough (yes that is her official name) uses the chalk board to beat up Stan as Ferrara spears Bo at ringside. Somehow it’s 8 to 6.5 so Ferrara uses Horsey Poo…which Bo likes so it’s tied (I think, as this is somehow even dumber and messier than it sounds). The table is brought in but Bo chokeslams Ferrara through it to win at 6:45.

Rating: N/A. This wasn’t wrestling.

By the way: this whole thing, from the start of Disco’s segment to moving on to the next thing was over seventeen minutes. That’s longer than the main events of multiple Wrestlemanias. On this mess. The next time you’re at some low level, badly paying job, just remember that someone was paid to come up with this. See how much worse that makes you feel. Absolutely horrible and one of the dumbest things I have ever sat through in wrestling.

Earlier today, Mike Tenay sat down with Monty Brown. We hear about his career in football as part of the Buffalo Bills and now he’s wrestling. He had to fight to get a contract as an undrafted free agent so he knows about the politics that he’ll have to face in wrestling. As for Ron Killings, he’s tired of hearing about about “them” holding him back. Cue Elix Skipper with a bunch of yellow paint to cover Brown.

Don Harris vs. Malice

First Blood. They brawl around ringside to start as James Mitchell is on commentary. The fight goes into the crowd as we hear about the weird symbolism of the blood from last week. It’s BLOOD. This doesn’t require an explanation. Harris hits him with a chair and they walk around the building with Malice taking over.

They go to the ramp where Harris reverses a powerbomb into a backdrop but here is Slash to jump him as well. Harris takes a spike from Slash and busts him open but Malice jumps him again. Mitchell gets the ceremonial blood poured on him, followed by Harris hitting a Boss Man Slam. Somehow this busts Harris open (yep) and Malice wins at 6:28.

Rating: D. Somehow, this was miles better than the previous match and it was a terrible brawl. The first blood thing is something that fits into what they did last week, but Malice won while Harris, as in one of the HARRIS TWINS, was beating him up. You can’t have one of the Harris Twins take a pinfall against the person who was supposed to be the big monster? It’s no wonder this promotion is such a mess if that’s their mentality out here.

Post match the Disciples beat him up and leave him laying.

Sonny Siaki is looking for Ricky Steamboat. Taylor Vaughn comes in to jump Bruce (who is here too) and challenges him for tonight. Bruce is in, for an evening gown match. Then AJ Styles and Low Ki start brawling.

Apollo vs. Jeff Jarrett

#1 contenders match with Ricky Steamboat as guest referee. Apollo hammers away to start but Steamboat cuts him off, allowing Jarrett to get in a shot of his own. The fight heads outside but Apollo grabs a sitout powerbomb for two back inside. They go back outside where Apollo (already bleeding) is dropped onto the announcers’ table but Steamboat cuts off a chair shot.

Back in and Jarrett knocks him down for two before tying him in the Tree of Woe. Steamboat breaks that up so Jarrett goes with the Figure Four instead. Apollo is up at two arm drops and the comeback is on, including a DDT for a double down. The right hands in the corner have Jarrett in more trouble and the superkick connects but Jarrett gets a foot on the rope. Apollo grabs a German suplex but Jarrett gets his shoulder up for the (delayed) three count at 10:05.

Rating: C+. Yeah Jarrett won, but my goodness it was nice to see a match actually go clean around here. It wasn’t a great match or even a particularly good one, but what matters is that it was actually wrestling. After everything else tonight, I’ll absolutely take this, even if it was just ok for the most part.

Post match Apollo yells at Steamboat, who says he has no problem with Apollo but Jarrett won. With Apollo gone, Steamboat says Jarrett gets Killings….just not in a World Title match. Instead, it’s Jarrett and Killings against AJ Styles and Jerry Lynn in a Tag Team Title match. So yeah, there’s the screwy twist that they just have to do. The fans even boo, because not only were they screwed out of a title shot, but Jarrett is screwed over as well as he won that match 100% clean and is getting ripped off. Again: this booking is horrible.

Miss TNA: Bruce vs. Taylor Vaughn

Bruce is defending in an Evening Gown match so Bruce is indeed in a dress. Bruce immediately takes her down and hits a suplex before adding a faceplant. Then he takes Vaughn’s dress off for the win in a total squash. This stuff is still so dumb.

Post match Bruce strips to make the fans happy and we get a lot of pixelation.

Don West gives us a preview of next week’s show and shills merchandise. To be fair, this is his specialty and he’s awesome at this kind of thing.

X-Division Title: Low Ki vs. AJ Styles vs. Jerry Lynn

Styles is defending and gets double teamed to start, including a faceplant. A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gives Lynn two on Ki but Styles is back up with a powerslam. Ki is back up with a dropkick and elbows but Styles pulls the referee in and kicks Ki low (there’s a joke there somewhere). Ki and Lynn strike it out until Lynn sends him to the apron for a legdrop over the rope.

The dragon sleeper has Styles and Lynn in trouble but Lynn takes Ki down. A top rope hanging DDT gets two on Styles with Ki making the save. Ki butterfly suplexes Styles for two and Styles puts Ki down for the same with Lynn making the save. Styles and Ki go up top and it’s a super sunset bomb to turn it into a Tower Of Doom. Ki gets back to back dragon sleepers for back to back saves.

Styles brainbusters Lynn for two but Lynn is back with a Ki Crusher 99 for two on Ki. Back up and Ki accidentally takes out the referee (ERG) but gets launched out to the floor. Styles chairs Lynn down so Ki covers for two, only for Styles to hit the Styles Clash to break it up….but Ki falls back on Lynn for the three (as in the third count, with the break apparently not mattering, which isn’t how it works in wrestling) for the title at 16:18.

Rating: A-. Rough ending aside, this was great. They were all going nuts and doing their thing as fast as they could and it made for an awesome match. As usual, the X-Division stuff is stealing the show and that shouldn’t be a surprise given what else we’re seeing. Excellent match here as they were doing everything they could for all of the time they had.

Jeff Jarrett and Ron Killings argue in the back as Styles beats up Lynn. Jarrett comes out to yell because OF COURSE he’s the last thing we see.

Overall Rating: C-. I’m not sure what it says when a show with that awesome of a main event, plus a good opener and a fine Apollo vs. Jarrett match is still so weak. The bad parts on this are just so bad that they drag down the good things. As usual with a Russo booked show, everything is just so all over the place and at times idiotic that you forget how good some of the wrestling really is. It’s an improvement over last week, and that’s all because of the X-Division carrying everything they can.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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NWA TNA Weekly PPV #5
Date: July 17, 2002
Location: Nashville Auditorium, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Ed Ferrara, Don West

We’re back for another batch of these things and the promotion is not in good shape. Save for the X-Division, the shows are just not very good and there isn’t much of a way around it. Ken Shamrock isn’t an interesting World Champion and Brian Christopher is still getting a lot of attention for whatever reason. Then there’s Jeff Jarrett, and I mean a lot of Jeff Jarrett, on top of everything else. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Jeff Jarrett going all nuts and attacking Ken Shamrock with a chair last week.

Shamrock doesn’t have any comment but he’s ready to show how mad he is.

Opening sequence.

Scott Hall and Jeff Jarrett, the latter of whom is ready to be in a ladder match for the #1 contendership to the World Title, brawl in the back and fight outside. The fight is broken up and executive Bill Behrens says Jarrett has forfeited his spot in the match.

Here is Malice (Jarrett’s scheduled opponent) with Father James Mitchell, so it’s open challenge time for the #1 contenders ladder match. The lights go out and….let’s get this over with as fast as we can.

Malice vs. Sabu

Ladder match for the #1 contenders match and Sabu starts fast with a tornado DDT. Malice isn’t having that and chokes him down before grabbing a chair. A backbreaker plants Sabu again and Malice sends him face first into a chair in the corner. It’s time to get the ladder, which Sabu dropkicks into Malice’s face. The triple jump dive to the floor drops Malice again before bridging the ladder between the apron and the barricade.

That takes way too long though and Malice drops him onto the ladder, followed by a World’s Strongest Slam onto it as well. Naturally Sabu is right back up with a springboard leg lariat into the ladder into Malice for another knockdown. It’s way too early to get the contract though as Malice powerbombs him down, followed by a nasty overhead belly to belly into the ladder.

Malice goes up but Sabu dropkicks the ladder out and chairs him in the head. Sabu kind of bulldogs the ladder down onto Malice, who is right back with a spinebuster. Malice’s climb up the ladder is cut off with a shove through a table, allowing Sabu to pull down the contract and win at 13:29.

Rating: C+. This could have been worse, as Sabu could still move and fits in far better with this kind of carnage than a regular match. If nothing else it adds a bit of a spark, as Sabu is a big enough name to be slotted into the World Title scene, even if it is for the short term. Besides, Malice’s time in the title scene has already been wrapped up so it is time to see someone new get a shot.

Post match the Disciples of the New Church come in to beat on Sabu and a super chokeslam puts him through a table.

Jeff Jarrett and Scott Hall are still being held apart and Jarrett is ejected.

Here’s AJ Styles for an unscheduled chat. Styles calls out Jerry Lynn, who storms to the ring and says Styles must want to know why Lynn jumped him last week. Lynn says he’s been wrestling for fourteen years and done more in this business than Styles has done in his lifetime.

Styles hasn’t done anything or even had to sleep in his car eating peanut butter sandwiches. Lynn gave him a chance when they teamed up and he isn’t going to stand for the disrespect. Styles lays him out and hits the Styles Clash. This was fine and to the point, but commentary responding to EVERYTHING either of them said took away a lot of the impact.

We look back at Jasmin St. Clair stripping for Jeremy Borash and Ed Ferrara making sure it happened in a funny bit.

Francine jumps St. Clair in the back and throws her in the shower.

K-Krush vs. Norman Smiley

Before the match, Krush brags about star power (he even SMELLS like a star). Why did the NWA put him in the ring with a NASCAR driver? They were afraid he was going to become something they couldn’t control and then they would have to sell his t-shirts. He’s been treated as a second class citizen despite being better than everyone. It’s because he’s a Black man, and he’s the truth.

With that out of the way, Krush knocks Smiley down into the corner but Smiley is back with the swinging slam. The Big Wiggle into a faceplant plants Krush again but he hits a spinning forearm to cut that off. Back up and a Russian legsweep gets Smiley out of trouble but Krush plants him with a sitout gordbuster for the win at 3:25.

Rating: C-. This really didn’t work, mainly because they went from a rather serious promo from Krush into something totally goofy, which is all Smiley did at this point. Smiley did have some status, but you probably shouldn’t be having the Big Wiggle after someone went on a rant about how he was being held back because of his face. Krush should have squashed him, but maybe don’t let Smiley get in that much goofy stuff.

Post match Krush takes off his belt and whips Smiley before hanging him over the top. Smiley’s wife comes out for the save and gets choked as well. This isn’t going to go well and it wasn’t exactly comfortable stuff anyway.

Puppet is in a trashcan and all annoyed about his match with Meatball. It’s implied that he is, uh, doing something rather personal with his hand.

The Dupps are all weird and make inappropriate comments about Goldilocks.

Flying Elvises vs. Christopher Daniels/Elix Skipper

Estrada is sent outside to start and Skipper hits a quick dive. Back in and Siaki takes over on Skipper before it’s back to Estrada for a butterfly suplex. Siaki joins commentary for a second to brag about how awesome he is before stomping away back inside. Estrada comes in with a double springboard moonsault but Skipper gets over for the tag to Daniels.

A Blue Thunder Bomb gets two on Estrada but Siaki’s cheap shot from the floor lets Estrada get in a quick knockdown. Skipper comes back in as everything breaks down, with Estrada hitting a springboard moonsault. Daniels hits a much less springboardy but far better moonsault for two of his own. Siaki and Daniels fight to the floor, meaning there’s no count off Skipper’s Play Of The Day. Instead Siaki comes back in for a rolling cutter to finish Skipper at 9:50.

Rating: C+. This was a fast paced tag match with the Elvises stealing the win over the rather talented Daniels/Skipper team. The tag division is still coming together and it is kind of hard to make that work. Putting teams together work though and this is the kind of match you have to use to make that work.

Post match the Dupps run in to take out the Elvises.

Scott Hall jumps K-Krush and leaves him laying without much trouble.

Meatball vs. Puppet

Hardcore match and Puppet jumps him to start, setting up a ram into a trashcan. Meatball knocks him to the floor though and it’s an ax handle from the apron. The fight heads up towards the entrance, where Meatball pulls some food from a shopping cart to mess Puppet up a bit. A dropkick sends a chair into Meatball’s face and a DDT gives Puppet two. Puppet hits a middle rope Fameasser onto a chair and a Vader Bomb onto a chair onto Meatball is good for the pin at 6:16.

Rating: D-. Oh come on. This was stupid, it wasn’t funny, the whole thing went on too long and this whole deal feels like such a waste of time. I’m sure someone gets a kick out of this but it’s just not working, with the gag of Puppet being a hardcore wrestler having lost the charm which barely existed in the first place. Just find something else to fill in the time.

Here is a damaged Jasmin St. Clair to call out Francine.

Francine vs. Jasmin St. Clair

It’s a brawl to start, they both lose clothes, Blue Meanie comes in to DDT Francine for the DQ at 1:25. This was all about the clothes and nothing more.

Meanie carries St. Clair off and Francine is taken out on a stretcher.

We look at some of Low Ki’s and AJ Styles’ signature moves.

X-Division Title: AJ Styles vs. Low Ki

Ki is challenging and they wrestle to the mat to start. Back up and they chop it out to a standoff until Ki takes him down. Ki strikes away as fans look at someone holding a sign, with security seemingly going after him. Styles gets in a slam and a flipping splash but Ki knees him to the apron.

Ki misses an Asai moonsault but he’s able to kick Styles in the face to cut off a dive. They slug it out on the apron until Ki gets a dragon sleeper in the ropes. Styles uses said ropes to escape and grabs a brainbuster for two. The Spiral Tap misses but Styles reverses a fireman’s carry into a Death Valley Driver for a needed breather. It’s Ki going up but he dives into the Styles Clash to retain Styles’ title at 10:36.

Rating: B-. These two work well together and that shouldn’t be a surprise given how well they have done in previous matches. It wasn’t exactly an epic showdown or a classic match, but they were working hard and it didn’t feel like two old rejects from WCW. Styles continues to be the breakout star around here and that is likely to continue if he’s going to keep doing this well.

Post match Jerry Lynn spears Styles down and gives him he piledriver. A ladder is brought in and Lynn suplexes him into it for the nasty crash.

Scott Hall vs. Brian Lawler

Before the match, Lawler rants about how stupid people have to be to be Jerry Lawler fans. The challenge is issued again and Brian throws in some Jim Ross insults for a bonus. Hall sneaks up behind him and after even more ranting from Brian, Hall finally punches him down to get going. Some right hands send Brian outside and even more knock him off th announcers’ table.

The beating goes around ringside until Brian gets in a shot of his own to take over. Back in and Brian hammers away as there are an awful lot of empty seats on camera. A suplex gives Brian two and, after insulting the fans some more, he goes up but gets slammed off the top. Hall’s belly to back superplex connects and, after taking out K-Krush, the Outsider’s Edge finishes Brian at 8:43.

Rating: C-. At the end of the day, these matches just aren’t very good. They’re a bunch of punching, a few other moves, and then the finish. It doesn’t help when Brian is doing basic heel stuff straight out of the Memphis playbook, but that is only going to do so much to get him around the fact that he’s Brian Lawler and won’t shut up about his dad. Hall didn’t do much more than his signature stuff, which is only so good at this point.

Post match Brian and Krush beat Hall down and hang him over the ropes.  Hall goes out on a stretcher but Jeff Jarrett runs in with a chair and wrecks Hall and pretty much everyone not named Lawler or Krush.

Overall Rating: C. There is some passable stuff on here but the bad is dragging it all the way down. Other than that, the good stuff, which is mainly centered around the less goofy people, is watchable enough. In other words, as has been the case, there is a decent show here if you get rid of the terrible parts. The problem is there is quite a bit of terrible and a lot of it is getting the focus. Fix that and this goes up in value, but it isn’t looking likely anytime soon. Ultimately, the biggest issue is that I have no idea what the biggest story is supposed to be around here and I don’t think the company does either.

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NWA-TNA Weekly PPV #4
Date: July 10, 2002
Location: Nashville Auditorium, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Ed Ferrara, Don West

The promotion is still getting started and still in search of a top story. We have Brian Christopher turning on Scott Hall so Jeff Jarrett could b a bigger villain, Ken Shamrock doing whatever he has going on and AJ Styles and Jerry Lynn being partners who can’t stand each other. That makes for a bit of a mixed bag around here, but odds are we’ll be seeing a bunch of dumb ideas to go with those. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

We recap how AJ Styles and Jerry Lynn won the Tag Team Titles in their first match as a team (minus Low Ki that is).

Tag Team Titles: AJ Styles/Jerry Lynn vs. Disciples Of The New Church

The Disciples (Slash/Tempest, with James Mitchell) are challenging. Slash shoulders Lynn down to start but a powerslam is escaped. Lynn runs the corner for a bulldog and Styles comes in for a running flipping splash to the back. Tempest (better known as Crowbar) comes in and gets his arm cranked, followed by a kick to the face for a bonus. Back up and Tempest runs him over, only to be sent outside. That doesn’t last long as Tempest is back in to take over, including an anklescissors out of the corner.

Styles gets backdropped to the apron but comes back in with a springboard missile dropkick, allowing the tag back to Lynn. Everything breaks down and the Disciples pull a diving Styles out of the air. Lynn makes a quick save and Styles adds a Lionsault for two on Tempest. Back up and Tempest’s Death Valley Driver gets two on Styles so Slash can come back in for some rams into the buckle.

What would become James Storm’s Eye of the Storm sends Styles flying but he’s fine enough to catapult Slash into the corner. Lynn comes back in to start the comeback, including a sitout bulldog for two on Tempest. Another Death Valley Driver is broken up and Lynn hits the cradle piledriver, only for Slash to kick him in the face. Styles tags himself back in and (kind of) hits the Spiral Tap to retain at 10:37.

Rating: C+. This was a way to show that the champions who don’t quite get along can get along well enough to retain the titles, even if they were still having issues. It’s still probably the top story in the promotion at the moment, or at least the most interesting, though I’m not sure how much ground that is covering. The New Church is already looking like a bunch of losers and odds are that is going to continue without much to make it better.

Post match a bunch of pyro goes off, which seems like quite the celebration for a title defense. Lynn isn’t pleased with Styles’ celebration and walks out.

Commentary shows us the end of last week’s show, with Brian Christopher turning on Scott Hall, leading to a big Jeff Jarrett beatdown. Hall calls in and swears vengeance, with the audio from the replay drowning out his interview, because this promotion doesn’t know what it’s doing.

Here is Christopher to say it’s time for his to transition from a child to a man. For his entire life, he has been known as Jerry Lawler’s son and now, screw Jerry. His dad was a terrible father and last week, Christopher took Hall out. He tells Jerry to go to h*** and goes on a rant about how Jerry was never there so now it’s time to be his own man. From now on, it’s all about Brian LAWLER. So Jerry shows up soon for a fight right? Otherwise, that would be a pretty big waste of a promo.

Brian Lawler vs. Norman Smiley

Lawler jumps him to start but Smiley gets in a shot of his own and stops to dance. The Big Wiggle ensues so Lawler plants him down to cut that off. A running shoulder in the corner has Smiley in more trouble but he avoids another one, with Lawler going shoulder first into the post. Smiley hammers away in the corner, only for Lawler to get in a low blow. The Hip Hop Drop (he does at least take off the goggles) finishes Smiley at 4:48.

Rating: C. It’s a heel turn, but unfortunately it’s a heel turn for Brian Lawler. You’re just only going to get so much out of that and I’m thinking we’ve already seen the peak of the whole thing. The Jerry promo was just weird and the match itself was just ok.

Post match Lawler calls out Scott Hall, who is next on his list.

Jeff Jarrett is told that he doesn’t have a World Title shot. He shoves Bill Behrens (How many authority figures does this show need?) and gets suspended before storming off. As this goes on, we can hear James Mitchell yelling at the New Church but the door is shut before we see anything.

K-Krush vs. Hermie Sadler

Before the match, Krush threatens the fans for liking NASCAR too much. They yell at each other to start before Krush hammers away, only to be sent outside. Sadler gets in a few shots and then rains down some right hands inside for two but Krush is back with the ax kick for an arrogant near fall of his own. A suplex gives Krush two more and a powerslam gets the same (with one finger). The Figure Four goes on but Sadler turns it over for the break, because he knows how to do that. Krush dives into a sitout powerbomb but Krush rolls him up with feet on the ropes for the pin at 5:06.

Rating: D+. What is there to say about this? It’s been one of the worst parts of the company for the first four weeks and it was bad again here. Sadler isn’t a wrestler and isn’t interesting but he’s the closest thing to a celebrity that they have who can get in the ring. The match was pretty bad even by celebrity standards and the Krush just cheated to beat him. Nothing to this one and hopefully it’s over.

Then Krush hits Sadler after the match and the decision is reversed. Victory?

Takao Omori, the #1 contender to the World Title, pays Alicia off.

Hot Shots vs. Briscoes

That would be Cassidy O’Reilly/Chase Stevens vs. those Briscoes, the latter of whom don’t get entrances. Jay headscissors Stevens down to start and it’s off to Mark, who gets spinebustered down. Mark comes back in with a springboard missile dropkick to the back but gets backdropped hard to the floor. The Hot Shots hit stereo dives….and cue Malice of the New Church to jump Stevens for the DQ at 2:10. This was rather fast paced but just a bunch of moves until the quick ending.

Post match Malice wrecks everyone as James Mitchell and the New Church approve. Mitchell says they aren’t leaving until Ken Shamrock’s blood is on Malice’s hands. There is no Shamrock, so Mitchell has the Disciples beat up the timekeeper. Now Shamrock runs in but gets beaten down, with Takao Omori running in for the save before their title match later.

The Dupps are rather disgusting but are ready to beat up the Flying Elvises. If the shoe fits, it’s probably the right size.

We’re ready for a tag match but adult film star Jasmin St. Clair interrupts instead. She knows what the letters TNA really stand for so who wants to see the real thing tonight? A chair is thrown in and ring announcer Jeremy Borash (described as her “little sex toy”) is sat down for a dance (with his eyes bugging out in a hilarious visual. Bill Behrens comes in with a towel and Ed Ferrara runs in to spear him down (ok points for a funny bit). St. Clair is taken out with the towel anyway to end an unintentionally funny but stupid segment.

Flying Elvises vs. Dupps

Fluff is here with the Dupps. It’s a brawl to start and Siaki is put down with a spinebuster as Mortimer Plumtree comes out, because something has to happen in every single match. Estrada gets sent into the corner as Plumtree says the Johnsons needed discipline after last week. Stan’s Alabama Slam out of the corner doesn’t even get one due to a foot on the rope but Siaki fakes a tag and takes over on Bo. The split legged moonsault gives Siaki two but Bo plants him back down. Stan comes in as everything breaks down, with Estrada hitting a springboard spinning Swanton for the pin on Stan at 5:03.

Rating: C. I’m not sure if you could have Vince Russo’s fingerprints on a match more than this one. Not only do you have a lowest common denominator gimmick like the Dupps, but you have another goofy thing in the Elvises, plus someone walking out without having much to do with the match, which is not exactly great in the first place. It’s a case of too much going on and the stuff that is going on not being very good anyway. Much like a lot of this show.

Jerry Lynn and AJ Styles are brawling throughout the back, with Lynn sending him into the barricade and hitting a cradle piledriver onto an anvil case.

NWA World Title: Takao Omori vs. Ken Shamrock

Shamrock is defending and fires off some knees to the ribs to start. A figure four headscissors has Omori in more trouble as Harley Race is watching at ringside. That’s broken up and the bigger Omori fights out of the corner and hits a running spinwheel kick. The chinlock doesn’t last long so Omori whips him into the corner, where the spinwheel kick misses.

Shamrock chokes on the rope but Omori grabs a running neckbreaker (though he seemed to come in from the wrong direction for a weird visual). Omori shrugs off some kicks to the bad leg (as injured by the missed kick) and hits a clothesline for two. A kneebar has Omori in more trouble so he makes the rope, meaning the ankle lock goes on…and here is Jeff Jarrett to chair Shamrock for the DQ at 7:53.

Rating: C. Of course that’s how it ends. This was another good example of what’s going wrong with a lot of this show: who is Omori, why should I care about him, and is this going to lead anywhere for him? Omori was named (not shown) last week and suddenly gets a World Title shot based on his reputation in Japan. You could have had him do a squash match or something last week to show us even a glimpse, but instead he’s debuted and loses his focus in less than eight minutes. That doesn’t make me want to see more, but rather wondering why I’m supposed to be interested.

Post match Jarrett beats up both of them, plus security.

Jerry Lynn won’t talk about what he did to AJ Styles. James Mitchell and the Disciples of the New Church come in, looking for Jeff Jarrett and the sin he just committed. Did he try the ring? As in where Jarrett just was? Anyway, we cut over to Bill Behrens, having been bound and gagged with FU written on his stomach, just like Jim Miller last week.

Low Ki vs. Elix Skipper vs. Kid Romeo vs. Christopher Daniels vs. Jerry Lynn vs. Tony Mamaluke

This is an elimination match to establish the X-Division rankings (the first wrestler eliminated is #6, the next is #5 and so on) and thank goodness there are tags. Romeo and Daniels start things off with Romeo working on the arm before switching to a headlock. A dropkick puts Daniels down again so it’s off to Skipper to kick him in the face. Mamaluke comes in to help double team Skipper down as commentary goes over some WCW history.

Skipper gets his leg dropkicked out to cut him off again but he hands it off to Lynn for a monkey flip. Ki comes in and kicks Mamaluke’s head off for two (that should have been an elimination) but Mamaluke is back with a suplex. It’s back to Romeo to chop away at Daniels until Lynn comes back in and sunset flips Romeo for two. A middle rope tornado DDT gives Lynn two more but Daniels monkey flips Lynn outside.

The Arabian moonsault drops Lynn again, setting up a big dive from Romeo. Ki and Skipper hit stereo flip dives of their own and everyone is down. Back in and Lynn hits his slingshot Fameasser over the ropes to Daniels, only to get crotched on top. Actually that’s it for Lynn, who is eliminated via….countout at about 10:15? That’s quite the stretch after EVERYONE WAS ON THE FLOOR JUST A FEW SECONDS AGO.

Anyway, Mamaluke gordbusters Daniels and grabs a Koji Clutch but Skipper comes back in with a running clothesline. The Play Of The Day gets rid of Mamaluke at 11:29 and we’re down to four. Ki comes in and stomps away on Skipper before sending him hard out to the floor. Back in and a Ki Crusher into the corner knocks Skipper silly for two, as these kickouts on Ki are a bit ridiculous. Skipper is back up with a backbreaker and a missile dropkick but it’s back to Daniels to slug away. Matt Hardy’s Ricochet drops Daniels and the Last Rites (something like Cross Rhodes) gets rid of Skipper at 14:54.

Romeo faceplants Daniels for two and dropkicks Ki off the apron, leaving Ki holding his arm. Daniels takes Romeo up top, only to get pulled into a super Air Raid Crash (that looked good) for the…not pin as Daniels’ foot was on the rope. Ki comes back in with the dragon sleeper to make Romeo tap at 17:03 and now we’re down to Ki vs. Daniels.

They trade chops in the corner until Daniels grabs a Downward Spiral for the double knockdown. The Best Moonsault Ever gives Daniels a delayed near fall and they trade cradles for two each. The dragon sleeper has Daniels in trouble again but he flips out in time. Daniels grabs an Iconoclasm (Fall From Grace) out of the corner for two more but a quick Ki Crusher gives Ki the win at 21:41.

Rating: B. Shockingly enough, this was the most entertaining match of the night, which probably comes from it getting more time and allowing the people involved to do their thing for a good while. I like the idea of having rankings in the division, but that isn’t going to matter if they don’t stick. It would not shock me at all to see Ki getting a shot and then Lynn jumping into a title match because of personal reasons, making most of the concept pointless, but at least they had a very fast paced match on the way there.

Post match the Flying Elvises run in to clean house because they wanted in the match (fair point). Tony Mamaluke and Kid Romeo run in for the save.

Commentary previews next week’s show….and here is Jeff Jarrett, who was suspended earlier tonight and it means nothing. He wants the World Title shot next week and yells at fans until going after some Tennessee Titans, who jump the barricade for the brawl. Cue the Disciples of the New Church, with Malice brawling with Jarrett into the crowd to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. Believe it or not, the X-Division is carrying this show, but at the end of the day, there is only so much that you can get out of them when the rest of the show is pretty horrible. As has been the case, it doesn’t feel like there is much in the way of focus around here and the show feels all over the place as a result. There are stories going on, but they’re not exactly things that I want to keep watching. The Lawler stuff feels like it could get stupid in a hurry and Jarrett whining about wanting a title shot has already lost its appeal. There’s good stuff in there, but there is a lot of bad to sit through to find it.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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NWA-TNA Weekly PPV #2
Date: June 26, 2002
Location: Von Braun Center, Huntsville, Alabama
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Ed Ferrara, Don West

So after last week’s not so great debut, we have the followup here, which was taped after the first show. The big story is Jeff Jarrett (shocking I know) vs. Scott Hall, which was set up at the end of last week’s show. In addition, we’re crowning the first ever X Champion, which should be quite a fun way to go. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a long recap of last week. Dang that’s a lot of Jeff Jarrett.

Opening sequence.

Commentary previews the show.

Scott Hall vs. Jeff Jarrett

Jackie Fargo and Toby Keith (yes the singer) are here with Hall, who knocks Jarrett down to start. That means an early standoff, which lets Jarrett yell at the referee. Hall slugs Jarrett down and sends him flying with the fall away slam, as he tends to do. Back up and Jarrett snaps off some dropkicks before grabbing the sleeper.

Hall reverses into one of his own but gets suplexed down (they LOVED that sequence) for a delayed two. The discus punch and some clotheslines have Jarrett in trouble but cue K-Krush to break up the Razor’s Edge. Jackie Fargo goes after K-Krush so Keith comes in to hit Jarrett low. A double faceplant finishes Jarrett at 6:58. Ignore that the referee would have seen everything Keith did.

Rating: C+. This was a match that wasn’t exactly lighting the mat on fire but what mattered was the star power. This might not exactly be a top level match on the biggest stage, but it is a pair of big, established names. That is how you get people watching and hopefully they stick around for everything else, though that is quite the tricky situation to make work.

We look at the various women in the lingerie battle royal, including the fight between Francine and Elektra last week.

Cheex vs. Frank Parker

Cheex, who probably weighs over 500lbs, has the Brown Eyed Girl with him. Parker’s clotheslines have no effect so Cheex slams him down and hits the running hip attacks. Parker gets in a cheap shot though and hammers away as Alicia is here to talk to Jeremy Borash. Not that it matters as Cheex fights back and hits the big splash for the pin at 2:10. This was exactly what you would think it would be.

Post match, Borash pays Alicia off.

Next week: Tag Team Titles.

We look back at K-Krush arguing with the NASCAR drivers last week, with Brian Christopher making the save.

K-Krush vs. Brian Christopher

Christopher has Sterling Marlin and Hermie Sadler (the aforementioned drivers) with him. Krush jumps him to start and hits an elbow in the corner but Christopher fights back in a hurry. A running bulldog gives Christopher two but Krush is right back with a suplex. We hit the chinlock for all of a few seconds before Christopher fights up and hits an enziguri. Christopher goes to hammer away in the corner but gets atomic dropped back down. Krush goes to the apron and gets crotched by the drivers. The Hip Hop Drop finishes Krush off at 5:07.

Rating: C. Something tells me Christopher is going to be getting a lot of TV time in the near future and that is only so interesting. There’s a reason he is best known for his time either as part of a team or with his dad and that is likely going to be on display here. The match was little more than an excuse for the drivers to hurt Krush and that is hardly interesting in the first place.

Miss TNA: Lingerie Battle Royal

Joanie, Francine, Shannon, Alexis Laree, Elektra, Taylor, Erin, Sasha, Tyler

This is bra and panties rules and the winner gets a contract. The fact that commentary doesn’t bother mentioning most of the entrants during their individual entrances isn’t the best sign of things to come. It’s a brawl to start as Ferrara talks about wanting to see skin pop out.

Various clothing is removed and Tyler and Sasha are out rather quickly. Erin is gone and a bunch of women get together to eliminate Francine. Joanie is out too and we’re quickly down to four. Ferrara goes over to hit on Francine and gets whipped for her efforts. Shannon and Laree eliminated in the melee, leaving Taylor to eliminate Elektra for the win at 4:48.

Rating: D. This was barely a match as it was more about everyone running all over the place and getting eliminated. There’s only so much you can get out of something like this and they weren’t hiding the point. That being said, this was bad even under this style’s standards, which says a lot as it doesn’t exactly have standards in the first place.

Post match Francine comes back in, takes out Taylor, and whips her with the belt.

Goldilocks is interviewing Apollo when Bobcat, with David Young, interrupts. Bobcat wants to know why she isn’t getting attention and yells at Goldilocks, who isn’t having it.

Apollo vs. David Young

Bobcat is in Young’s corner. Young’s running shoulders have no effect and a double arm trap belly to belly sends Young flying again. Back up and Apollo misses a charge into the corner as Bobcat hits on Jeremy Borash. A chinlock doesn’t last long so Young grabs a suplex for two, setting up another chinlock. Apollo is back up with a tornado DDT but Young snaps off a spinebuster. Instead of covering though, Apollo yells at Bobcat for being on Borash’s lap. The distraction lets Apollo hit a superkick into a TKO for the pin at 5:27.

Rating: C. This was a nice enough showcase for Apollo, who was treated as a pretty big deal in last week’s Gauntlet For The Gold. The company is going to need to build up some names that aren’t all WWF/WCW castoffs and Apollo could be a nice place to start. He certainly has a good look and that is more than a nice foundation, with the col finisher helping too.

Post match Bobcat gets in the ring with Young and celebrates, leaving Young to walk off.

Here is Joel Gertner to limerick about various things and then talk about the joys of alternative lifestyles. That’s enough to bring out the Rainbow Express and we’re ready to go.

Rainbow Express vs. The Dupps

Hold on though as we cut to the back where the Dupps aren’t going to wrestle. Executive Bill Behrens panics but runs into Chris Harris and James Storm, who he sends to wrestle the match instead.

Rainbow Express vs. Chris Harris/James Storm

The Express jumps them during their entrance but Storm kicks away at Lenny. A tornado DDT puts Storm down and Lenny kisses Bruce’s hand for a tag. Bruce’s sunset flip gets two and everything breaks down for a bit. The Express uses the distracted referee to get in a cheap shot on Storm, allowing Lane to grab the Tiger (Lion) Tamer. Harris isn’t having that and breaks it up with a clothesline, meaning it’s a hot tag to bring in Harris to clean house. Everything breaks down and the Express is rammed together, with Harris grabbing a rollup for the pin at 4:48.

Rating: C-. The right team won, which is at least somewhat due to how terrible the Express is presented. The wrestlers are fine, but it’s playing up every stereotype and treating them as heels, which is hardly a great way to go. Harris and Storm fall into the category of “they’re new and young so maybe try something”, which is something that has to happen in a big way around here.

Here is Ricky Steamboat, in a referee shirt, to bring out World Champion Ken Shamrock for a chat. Steamboat puts over the title as important and Shamrock promises to defend the title with honor. Cue James Mitchell to interrupt, saying he is on a mission from God (his, not yours) and that is why the Disciples of the New Church will control the NWA World Title. Mitchell issues a title challenge for next week against Slash. Shamrock says let’s do it tonight but here is Malice from behind to lay him out. Apparently Malice is getting the title shot instead. Makes more sense.

We look at last week’s six man tag with the Flying Elvises beating AJ Styles, Low Ki and Jerry Lynn. The three losers and Psicosis are in the X-Division Title tournament, leaving Ferrara to ask the logical question: why aren’t the WINNERS fighting for the title?

X Title: Jerry Lynn vs. AJ Styles vs. Psicosis vs. Low Ki

For the vacant title and it’s double elimination, meaning it’s a string of singles matches and you have to lose two falls to be eliminated, with the last man standing being the champion. That’s a unique idea and I could go for seeing it used again. Styles chops at Psicosis to start but gets faceplanted down for his efforts. A superkick gives Styles two but Psicosis knocks him down and hits the guillotine legdrop for two. Back up and a hurricanrana is countered into the Styles Clash to give Psicosis his first loss at 2:01.

Psicosis – 1 loss
Styles – 0 losses
Ki – 0 losses
Lynn – 0 losses

Low Ki comes in to kick away at Styles, including an enziguri. Another Styles Clash is broken up and they go to the corner, where Ki reverse superplexes him into a dragon sleeper. Styles makes the rope so Ki kicks him in the face, only to miss a Phoenix splash. A hard clothesline takes Ki down again and a belly to back faceplant gives Ki his first loss at 4:21 total.

Psicosis – 1 loss
Ki – 1 loss
Styles – 0 losses
Lynn – 0 losses

Lynn is in next and immediately hits the cradle piledriver to pin Styles at 4:41 total.

Psicosis – 1 loss
Ki – 1 loss
Styles – 1 loss
Lynn – 0 losses

Psicosis comes in to dropkick Lynn down but he’s back up with a middle rope bulldog for two. A headscissors sends Lynn outside and there’s the big flip dive to drop him again. Back in and a top rope spinwheel kick gives Psicosis two but he gets dropkicked out of the air. Another cradle piledriver pins Psicosis to officially eliminate him at 7:42 total.

Ki – 1 loss
Styles – 1 loss
Lynn – 0 losses
Psicosis – Eliminated

Ki is back in to kick Lynn down for two and a power drive elbow gets the same. A super hurricanrana connects but Lynn rolls through into a sunset flip for two of his own. There’s an enziguri to stagger Ki again and Lynn hits a jumping Fameasser from the apron. Ki tries a triangle choke but gets powerbombed down for a VERY near fall, with the fans not exactly seeming convinced by the kickout. Ki’s fisherman’s buster is countered into a DDT (nicely done) and the cradle piledriver gives Lynn the pin at 12:02 total.

Styles – 1 loss
Lynn – 0 losses
Psicosis – Eliminated
Ki – Eliminated

So it’s down to Styles vs. Lynn, with Styles needing to beat him twice in a row to win the title. Styles is right back in with a discus lariat and a spinwheel kick gets two. A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gives Lynn two of his own but Styles blocks a sunset flip and hits a slingshot splash for two. Lynn’s tornado DDT gets two more and they’re both down for a breather. Back up and Styles’ neckbreaker gets two, followed by Lynn’s rather snappy Liger Bomb out of the corner getting the same. Styles is right back with a Styles Clash for the pin at 16:05 total.

Styles – 1 loss
Lynn – 1 loss
Psicosis – Eliminated
Ki – Eliminated

It’s one fall to a finish for the title and Ricky Steamboat comes in to referee. They trade pinfall reversal sequences to start until Lynn knocks him to the floor. There’s a whip into the barricade to drop Styles but he’s right back with a shot of his own. Back in and Lynn hits a reverse suplex to drape Styles over the top before reversing a hurricanrana into a flipping faceplant for two.

Back up and Styles hits the fireman’s carry backbreaker for two of his own but Lynn’s brainbuster gets two more. The sleeper goes on, with Styles jawbreaking his way to freedom. Styles goes up and gets superplexed back down for two and Lynn is getting frustrated. Lynn takes him up again but gets shoved down, setting up the Spiral Tap to give Styles the pin and the title at 25:59.

Rating: B. This was a really cool idea and something I could go for seeing again. The double elimination stipulation made it feel like the best person won and helped cover the idea of the last person entering having a huge advantage. Styles is someone who has already stood out and beating someone with the status of Lynn is only going to help move him along.

We look at all of the falls in the title match.

Commentary previews next week to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. Good enough show here, though the promotion is firmly still in the “getting its feet wet” stage. They have only presented about three and a half hours of content and are still getting their initial champions set. That should make for some good enough shows, but they are still having some of the freak show aspects with things like Cheex. The main event is rather good though, as they are trying to find a mixture of established names and young up and comers, which seems to be working well enough, at least so far. It’s way too early to tell though and that is going to be the case for a long time.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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NWA-TNA Weekly PPV #1
Date: June 19, 2002
Location: Von Braun Center, Huntsville, Alabama
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Don West, Ed Ferrara

I’ve tried to do this series more than once and it has never quite worked but I might as well try it again. I’ve done the first 18 before but since it’s been so many years and I can’t even remember what happened, we’ll just start from the beginning. This is of course the new Jerry Jarrett promotion that was designed to fill in the gap left by WCW and it went…well yeah. Let’s get to it.

Commentary gets their entrances and we get an intro to the company, as well as the rules for tonight’s Gauntlet For The Gold (basically a Royal Rumble with a singles match at the end) for the World Title.

We open with an in-ring legends ceremony, with some big names included:

Harley Race
Dory Funk Jr.
Jackie Fargo
Bob Armstrong
Corsica Joe
Bill Behrens
Ricky Steamboat

Steamboat has the World Title and talks about how important the belt is to him and everyone else in the ring. Tonight you will see the Gauntlet For The Gold for the title and Steamboat will be the guest referee when it gets down to two. Cue Jeff Jarrett to interrupt and he hates the whole idea. Fargo doesn’t want to hear it and puts Jarrett in the Gauntlet at #1. Cue Ken Shamrock to say he doesn’t like this either, but Jarrett isn’t beating him up. Cue Scott Hall through the crowd (fresh off being thrown out of WWE) to say quit crying about the match because that’s how it’s going to go.

Puppet the Psycho Dwarf thinks his match should start the show because he’s the real star.

AJ Styles/Low Ki/Jerry Lynn vs. Flying Elvises

The Elvises would be Sonny Siaki/Jorge Estrada/Jimmy Yang and they jump the other three to start. Lynn is right up for a dive onto Siaki as Styles powerslams Yang. Lynn comes in with a backbreaker for two on Yang as this is all action to start. Back up and Yang sends Lynn into the corner for the step up moonsault kick too the chest. It’s off to Siaki, who gets sent into the corner so Ki can come in to strike away. An over the shoulder backbreaker plants Ki before a Samoan drop into a moonsault gets two.

A neckbreaker out of the corner into a running shooting star press gets two on Ki but he’s back with a heck of a kick to the head. It’s back to Styles for the springboard moonsault into the reverse DDT for two as everything breaks down. Lynn Cradle Piledrives Estrada but walks into a fisherman’s neckbreaker from Siaki. Ki kicks Styles by mistake though and Yang Time (twisting moonsault) is good for the pin on Styles at 6:27.

Rating: B-. And that’s how TNA starts. They weren’t kidding with the “total nonstop action” part as they had all six people going nuts out there and cramming in as much stuff as they could in about six and a half minutes. That isn’t much time to work with but Styles looked like a star and Lynn looked like the established veteran while Ki was the hard striker. Throw in a kind of awesome gimmick like the Flying Elvises and how can you go wrong?

Teo vs. Hollywood

It’s a midget match and Teo, the World’s Smallest Extreme Athlete, jumps him to start and hammers away in the corner. Tenay talks about how Rey Mysterio was asked to be a midget wrestler when he started. Ferrara: “And what happened?” Tenay: “Obviously he didn’t.” Thanks for that Mike. They trade rollups for two each until Hollywood knocks him down and hits a top rope splash for two. Teo comes back with a Russian legsweep into a top rope twisting Swanton for the pin at 2:49. Short and pretty much what you would expect here.

Apparently Teo stands for Totally (Totally E) Outstanding.  That’s….eh it’s kind of clever.

Ferrara gets in the ring and announces next week’s lingerie battle royal, with Ferrara and West bringing out various women who will be included, such as Francine, Shannon (Daphne), Alexis Laree (Mickie James), Elektra (from ECW) and more. Francine says none of these women can compare to her but Elektra doesn’t want to hear about extreme. The brawl is on and clothes are ripped off.  This was what you would think it would be.

Mortimer Plumtree, a rather nerdy manager who carries a paddle, brags about the force of his rather obedient tag team: the Johnsons.

Johnsons vs. Psicosis/James Storm

That’s quite a team to face off against the guys in flesh colored outfits meant to resemble a certain body part. Storm is a cowboy of course but looks more like a flasher in a cowboy hat. He does at least have some cap guns to make it more authentic. Richard sends Psicosis hard into the corner to start and snaps off a suplex for two. The Johnsons are sent into each other though and Storm dropkicks Rod down.

Cue Alicia (Ryan Shamrock) to watch, with commentary being glad for the camera to pan out and show the rest of her. Psicosis comes back in for a basement dropkick but the Johnsons plant him with a double flapjack. A t-bone suplex drops Psicosis again as commentary makes rather lame jokes. Psicosis faceplants his way out of a powerbomb attempt but the Johnsons snap off stereo suplexes. Everything breaks down and a sloppy TKO finishes Storm at 4:54.

Rating: C-. For a match that was all about making various awful jokes over one idea as many times as possible, this was surprisingly dull. Psicosis and Storm are as thrown together as you can find and while the Johnsons were a decent power team, they couldn’t be more one joke if they tried. It’s designed to make the writers laugh and if they have to go for a joke on the first show, so it be I guess.

Post match Alicia talks to the referee, who pays her.

The Dupps (Stan, better known as Trevor Murdoch, and Bo) go to have beers with their cousin Fluff but they aren’t allowed to wrestle.

Here are NASCAR drivers Hermie Sadler and Sterling Marlin for a chat. Marlin is the current season points leader and is ready to go race in California this week. Cue K-Krush (R-Truth) who is sick of hearing about race car drivers. He’s a real athlete instead of someone who drives around in a circle.

Sadler mocks Krush’s look and says this place is full of NASCAR fans. Krush isn’t interested but Brian Lawler (Grandmaster Sexay) runs in for the save. The drivers get to beat Krush up and Lawler issues the challenge for next week. Seems to be on. Commentary going back and forth between Brian Christopher and Brian Lawler isn’t a good sign.

Jeff Jarrett is choking Jackie Fargo.

Christian York/Joey Matthews vs. Dupps

The Dupps, with Fluff (the cousin AND girlfriend), are as stereotypical of a hillbilly team as you could get. York gets dropped to start but Matthews comes in with a double springboard dropkick. Bo strikes away on Matthews and hits a standing splash for two. Back up and Matthews clotheslines his way to freedom, allowing York to come in and clean house. Everything breaks down and York hits a tornado DDT but Fluff breaks up something off the top, allowing Stan to get the pin at 3:42.

Rating: C. York and Matthews are a good team for a pair of young, athletic stars but there is only so much you can get when you have a one note comedy act. The Dupps are about as dumb of a team as you can get, save for the team that we saw in the previous match. One team showed potential while the other was awful, so guess which team won.

Here’s the video for Toby Keith’s How Do You Like Me Now. He’s no Hardcore Holly.

Here is Keith to sing Courtesy Of The Red White And Blue live and, after quite a lengthy performance, Jeff Jarrett interrupts. Jarrett: “How do you like ME now?” Keith is held back.

NWA World Title: Gauntlet For The Gold

The title is vacant coming in (as Dan Severn was stripped of the title due to not defending it here), there are twenty entrants with ninety second intervals and it’s a battle royal until the final two entrants. Jeff Jarrett is in at #1 and Buff Bagwell is in at #2 to slug away and hit the running neckbreaker. The Blockbuster connects but a charging Bagwell is sent out with a backdrop. Lash Leroux is in at #3 And they both head outside (not eliminated) to slug it out.

Back in and the Stroke connects, with Leroux being easily tossed. Norman Smiley is in at #4 as the remaining time is skipped if there is only one person in the ring. Good for fans, totally unfair to the lone wrestler. Jarrett blocks the Big Wiggle and tosses Smiley without much trouble. Apollo (a rather big and muscular wrestler from Puerto Rico) is in at #5 and manages to send Jarrett to the apron for some stomping but can’t get him out. K-Krush is in at #6 and saves Jarrett from a gorilla press, setting up an ax kick to Apollo. Slash, with James Mitchell, is in at #7 as Apollo fights up.

Jarrett saves Slash for no logical reason and the villains hammer on Apollo again. Del Rios is in at #8 as the ring is starting to fill up. The rather large Justice (soon to be known as Abyss) is in at #9 and hits the yet to be named Black Hole Slam on Del Rios. Slash adds a reverse DDT to Del Rios and it’s Konnan in at #10 to pick up the pace.

That gives us a grouping of Jarrett, Apollo, K-Krush, Slash, Del Rios, Justice and Konnan, which is quite the collection. Here is Joel Gertner to limerick Bruce (better known as Kwee Wee in WCW) at #11. The entrance takes so long that almost nothing can happen before Rick Steiner is in at #12. Slash is eliminated and Justice follows him as Rick clears some of the ring. Malice (formerly known as The Wall in WCW and Slash’s partner in the Disciples Of The New Church) is in at #13 and throws out Bruce, K-Krush, Del Rios and Konnan before low bridging Steiner out. Apollo skins the cat to stay alive and it’s Scott Hall in at #14.

A superkick drops Malice and Hall hits the Razor’s Edge to plant Jarrett. Toby Keith is in at #15 (oh dear) and suplexes Jarrett (who can’t hide that he’s doing the work) before tossing him out. Keith walks out, seemingly eliminating himself, leaving us with Hall, Apollo and Malice. Chris Harris is in at #16 to pick up the pace but the Vampire Warrior (Gangrel) follows him and seems to be in as well. Devon Storm (formerly known as Crowbar) is in at #17 (I think?) and gets to hit some people but no one is tossed.

Steve Corino is in at #18 and seems rather happy to be here. Mitchell gets in a cheap shot to cut Corino off as Ken Shamrock is in at #19. Some rather hard striking abounds until Malice catches him with a chokeslam. Harris is sent to the apron but comes back in to hammer on the Warrior. Brian Christopher is in at #20, giving us a final grouping of Hall, Apollo, Malice, Harris, Warrior, Storm, Corino, Shamrock and Christopher.

Harris, Storm and the Warrior are out in a hurry and Christopher knocks Corino out as well. Shamrock kicks Christopher down and throws him out before Malice does the same to Apollo. Hall is tossed as well and it’s Shamrock vs. Malice for the title, with Ricky Steamboat as referee.

Malice puts him down rather quickly and gets two off a side slam. Shamrock’s sunset flip is blocked but the chokeslam is countered into a cross armbreaker. Malice grabs the rope so Shamrock grabs the ankle lock, with Malice going to the rope again. For some reason Shamrock just pulls him back and doesn’t let go, so another rope has to be grabbed for the real break. Shamrock even yells at Steamboat (no one yells at Ricky Steamboat) before countering a chokeslam into a belly to belly suplex for the pin and the title at 37:37.

Rating: C+. There were definitely names involved here and it made the match feel more prestigious. A match like this is about setting the standard for the main event scene going forward and Shamrock is a good choice to start things off. Malice felt like a monster but there is only so much you can get out of that monsterness when Shamrock beats him in a few minutes. For now though, this is the right call and you know that Jarrett is going to have something to complain about.

Commentary talks about the night but here is Jeff Jarrett to yell at Dory Funk Jr., Harley Race and Bob Armstrong over how a World Title shouldn’t be decided in a battle royal. Jarrett drops Funk and Armstrong so here are Jackie Fargo and Toby Keith to yell. Fargo says he’ll get Scott Hall to fight Jarrett next week. Hall runs in and brawls with Jarrett to end the show. They’re the biggest stars in the company but it’s not a great idea to put them out there just after crowning a new World Champion.

Overall Rating: C-. Oh this was a rough start, with only a few bright spots. The main event was good enough and the opener worked, but the obsession with the country/southern stuff and the dumb “comedy” tag teams were just bad. It’s not a show I’d want to keep watching, but in theory they were going for the idea of having no alternatives to WWE. Call it a case of anything being better than nothing, but egads they have a lot of work to do.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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TNA Weekly PPV #9
Date: August 14, 2002
Location: Tennessee State Fairgrounds Arena, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Don West, Ed Ferrara

It’s the first show in a somewhat new era for TNA as the Truth is now champion and tonight is challenging for the tag titles with Jarrett. Other than that we have nothing scheduled but I’m sure we’ll have something that makes me angry because of how stupid it is, but then again this is Tennessee so it has to be a bit stupid. Let’s get to it.

Here’s Truth to open the show. We get a somewhat milestone moment for TNA as Truth calls this place the TNA Asylum. He’s a legend now that he’s champion apparently. When he was in the WWF, he couldn’t break certain rules because he’s black. This can’t end well. I mean it can’t. He insists that he isn’t playing the race card, but the line of “and that’s the truth” isn’t invented yet.

Cue Jarrett who calls Truth Walt Disney. Jarrett complains about reverse discrimination (wouldn’t it be discrimination in general?) and wants a shot TONIGHT. Truth says bring it but here’s Bill Behrens looks like a schmuck in a cowboy hat. He says he’s the new sheriff in town and any match between these two at the moment won’t be for the title. Jeff goes after Behrens but Brian Lawler jumps Jeff. He tries to get a fan’s chair but the fan won’t let him have it. Memphis this is not. Lawler shouts that he knew it was Jeff and that’s about it.

The announcers do their welcoming stuff.

Kid Kash/Slim J/Shark Boy vs. Spanish Announce Team

This should be fun. J is 17 years old and is dressed like Eminem. The SAT is comprised of the Maximos (Jose and Joel) and Amazing Red. Kash and I think that’s Jose start things off. They fight over a hammerlock to start before things speed up in a hurry. They trade a bunch of armdrags and it’s a standoff. Jose offers a handshake but Kash flips him off. Joel comes in and they kind of botch a reverse monkey flip.

Joel gets sent up and over to the floor and then out onto the barricade. Kash hits a sweet slingshot rana to the floor and everyone heads to the floor. J and Red are still in the ring and J looks like a 17 year old in over his head. He sends Red to the floor and tries a moonsault press to take out all three guys, nearly smacking his head on the apron in the process. Red hits a much better dive to take out everyone at once. Kash takes out everyone with an even bigger dive than that.

It’s Joel vs. Kash in the ring now but it’s quickly off t J. J keeps grabbing his crotch which can’t be a good thing. He misses a standing corkscrew shooting star and things break down a bit. Jose puts J on his back and Red uses J as a springboard to rana Kash. The rana doesn’t work and it looked badly botched but it was a cool idea. Another cool yet overly complicated idea sees Shark Boy and J having their limbs interlocked while having J put in a camel clutch and Sharky put in a Boston Crab at the same time. Red adds a dropkick to J’s face to end the move.

J charges into a boot, ducks a dive, and hits a kind of flipping kick off the middle rope for two. Kash hooks a freaky standing Boston Crab on Red before they both go up. Kid hits something like a release powerslam off the top which lands with a big crash. J comes in and after shaking his balls again (stop doing that!) he misses a Phoenix Splash.

Shark Boy comes in and everything breaks down again. Shark boy hits Diamond Dust (Dead Sea Drop) on Red followed by the Moneymaker (double underhook piledriver) from Kash for two. J botches another rana and settles for a neckbreaker instead. The double C4 off the top (Spanish Fly) sets up the Infrared (big spinning legdrop) from Red to pin J. Dude deserved the beating.

Rating: C. If I never see Slim J again I’ll be perfectly happy. The guy is your stereotypical indy guy who does a lot of flips and thinks that makes him a wrestler. He botched almost everything he did and STOP GRABBING YOUR CROTCH ALREADY! This had its moments but going nearly 11 minutes is too long to have a match like this, especially with the amount of botches they had in here. Good idea, bad execution.

Dang it it’s the Dupps again. Stan tries to get Goldilocks to touch his crotch (do we have a recurring theme here?) so she does, with a solid right hand. We have an outhouse joke too.

Here’s Bruce to issue an open challenge for the Miss TNA crown. A plant signs a release and we have a match.

Miss TNA: Bruce vs. Tina Hamilton

The fan doesn’t say her name but that’s the name I found for her when I looked it up. Yes, I actually looked it up. The chick takes Bruce down with a spear and some more basic stuff before sending him to the floor. Back in she tries to slam him and gets small packaged for the pin. This gimmick is already old.

Jarrett says he didn’t do anything to Lawler but he’ll play whatever games he needs to in order to win the title. He goes to the men’s room to find Behrens sitting down. Jarrett yells at him and we pan over to Bo Dupp who runs into the midget Teo. Great it’s another hardcore match tonight.

Malice vs. Don Harris

Speaking of matches I don’t care to see, this is last man standing. The New Church is barred from ringside and clearly the words of the authority figures in this company mean SO much right? Harris immediately cracks Malice in the head with a chair for about a six count. Another chair shot puts Malice down again but as Harris loads up a third, Malice throws powder in Harris’ face.

They head to the floor and Malice gets in some more chair shots. Malice is busted open off one of those chair shots. West: “IF THIS HAD BEEN LAST WEEK THE MATCH WOULD BE OVER!” Ferrara: “…..but it’s not last week.” They head up to the stage and Malice throws him off the stage and into the barricade. Malice has a chain but Harris kicks him in the face to take Malice down. Harris chokes him with the chain and loads up a table.

Back in and another big boot puts a chair into Malice’s face. Harris loads up the table in front of the corner but Malice powerbombs Harris down. Harris comes back with a DDT but Malice belly to back superplexes Harris through the table. Don gets up first but Malice falls down at 9, giving Harris the win.

Rating: D+. The only word that comes to my head here is so. As in so what. Why am I supposed to care about this? I have no idea why these guys are fighting other than they were fighting last week and even then I have no idea why they were fighting before that. Also, if you’re going to have first blood and then last man standing, why have the wrestler win the first blood and then the security guy win last man standing? That’s backwards booking.

They pound fists in respect post match. Ok then.

Stan Dupp is afraid of midgets so Bo is fighting tonight.

Dupp Cup: Teo vs. Bo Dupp

Teo is a midget and it’s that stupid points thing again from last week. JB is beaten up, weapons are used, Stan screams which somehow loses points for Bo, weapons are used, and Bo is flushed in a toilet for Teo to win. Somehow that took four minutes and since I rate wrestling, this gets nothing. Thankfully this is the last appearance of the Dupps under this inane gimmick.

We recap Monty Brown vs. Elix Skipper which involved Brown being painted yellow.

Skipper calls Brown a chicken in some very colorful language.

Elix Skipper vs. Monty Brown

This is a street fight because two hardcore based matches in an hour isn’t enough. Skipper tries to jump Brown as he comes out but Brown sneaks up on him in a funny bit. Monty pounds him down to the ring as I guess the match has already started. They head to the ring and Brown chokes Skipper out with a shirt. I’m not entirely sure why these two started fighting in the first place but I think it was something racial.

Brown keeps fiddling with the shirt and the break lets Skipper use the Matrix to avoid a charge and get in some offense. Skipper is a smaller guy and he can’t go toe to toe with Brown so he sticks and moves, which is pretty stupid in a street fight where you can use weapons. Elix brings in a garbage can and blasts away with it, knocking Brown to the floor. Skipper hits the big spot of the match with a slingshot splash onto the can onto Brown which gets two as apparently this is now a hardcore match. Back in and Brown shrugs most of that off, beats on Skipper for a bit, and Alpha Bombs him on a trashcan for the pin.

Rating: D+. What was the point of this? To make Skipper look like a guy that has no chance against someone bigger than he is? Was it to make Brown look like a monster? If it’s either one of those things they didn’t do that at all. I have no idea what the point of this was and it didn’t work for the most part.

The Flying Elvises talk in the back. Well Yang and Estrada talk while Siaki looks away. Siaki turns around and insults Elvis before saying the other two should look up to him rather than Elvis. I think they’re trying to turn Estrada and Yang face but it’s not really working.

X-Division Title: Low Ki vs. Jorge Estrada vs. Sonny Siaki vs. Jimmy Yang

Four corners elimination here. Yang and Estrada have armbands on because it’s been 25 years since Elvis died. There are tags required here so it’s Low Ki vs. Siaki to start. Siaki LAUNCHES Low Ki out of the corner but Low Ki comes back with kicks of course. Siaki takes him down but Estrada tags himself in and hits a running shooting star press for two. Low Ki escapes a suplex and fires away kicks at Estrada including a BIG one to the head.

Tenay says the kicks break your opponents spirits. Estrada gets put in a dragon sleeper, as does Siaki who came in sans tag. Off to Yang who hits what we would call a Rough Ryder to take Low Ki down followed by a middle rope spinwheel kick for no cover. Siaki isn’t even paying attention to the match and Yang escapes the Ki Crusher. Yang is placed on the top rope and chokes Low Ki over the ropes in a Tarantula kind of move.

Low Ki kicks him down and Estrada tags himself in to face Yang. Things speed up with Yang being knocked to the floor. There’s a BIG dive by Estrada and Yang is in trouble. Back in and Estrada hits a tornado DDT which Yang “blocks” (I didn’t see a block) it and dropkicks Estrada down. Yang puts on a Boston Crab and Estrada taps before the referee is even down to check him. That looked odd.

Low Ki sneaks in on Yang and kicks him a bit as is his custom. Yang gets his foot up in the corner to stop a charging champion. A missile dropkick gets two for Yang as Siaki is still not paying attention. Yang goes up but Siaki intentionally crotches him down. Ki Crusher gets us down to one on one. Siaki immediately charges in and pounds away on Low Ki but the clothesline each other down. Low Ki gets up first and hits a springboard spin kick followed by even more kicks to the chest. Siaki hits some kind of freaky looking punch. Yang comes back and decks Siaki, knocking him into a rollup to keep the belt on the kicking dude.

Rating: C. This was more about the angle than the match and I don’t think anyone thought Low Ki was in danger of losing the title. Siaki needs to get away from the other Elvises so he can become a bigger star, which he only kind of did in the future. Not much of a match but there were some good parts to it.

Earlier today, Jerry Lynn left the arena, went to a gas station, and beat up AJ Styles before demanding respect. Ok then.

It’s time for Jive Talking. Tonight’s guest: Dean Baldwin, more famous as Shark Boy but minus the mask here. Disco asks lame jokes about the other Baldwin brothers and does so for awhile. Brian Lawler comes out and yells about Jarrett some more before jumping Disco and getting taken away by security.

Stan Dupp says he’s leaving and Bo is confused/scared.

Tag Titles: AJ Styles/Jerry Lynn vs. Ron Killings/Jeff Jarrett

Truth is world champion and is challenging here so I’ll only refer to Styles and Lynn as champions for the sake of clarity. AJ isn’t here to start so Lynn gets double teamed early on. A double suplex puts Lynn down and here’s AJ for the save. Jarrett takes the drop down/kick sequence from AJ for two. All four are on the floor now with Styles hitting an Asai Moonsault onto Jeff.

Back in and Killings misses a side kick to Lynn and Styles gets dropped face first onto the steps. Lynn monkey flips Killings down and Jarrett is whipped into the barricade. Lynn hits a middle rope bulldog for two as Jarrett saves. All four are in the ring again and Styles misses a moonsault that would have hit Lynn anyway. Jarrett is the first person on the apron but he gets tagged in before he has a single opponent to face.

Ok so it’s Jeff vs. Jerry to start with Jarrett hitting the running hip attack to Lynn who is in 619 position. That and a sitout slam gets two for Jeff and it’s back to Truth. Lynn gets in a shot but a low blow from the Truth takes him right back down. An ax kick gets two for Truth but Jeff’s Stroke is countered. Jeff hooks a sleeper and Jerry is in trouble again. Lynn escapes that as well and puts Jarrett in a figure four which is quickly countered.

Back to Truth who slugs it out with Jerry and does his backflip out of the corner into the splits into the side kick sequence. That gets two but Lynn comes back with a tornado DDT to put both guys down. Off to AJ vs. Jeff with Styles firing off kicks to take over. Jeff tries a sunset flip which AJ rolls through into a Styles Clash attempt and everything breaks down. The champs double team Jarrett for two and load up a springboard Hart Attack, but AJ slips and hits Lynn in the back instead.

AJ accidentally spears the referee down as Lynn hits a reverse DDT on Jarrett. There’s no count because of the referee being down so Lynn cradle piledrives Truth instead but there’s STILL no referee. Jeff hits the Stroke on Lynn as AJ hits Spiral Tap on Truth. A second referee slides in and we’ve got a double pin.

Rating: C. The match was a standard tag match but man alive after two hours of this show I don’t care anymore. The ending sets up the titles being stripped from both teams and eventually a new team would win them. Other than that, there was nothing to see here but some notable botches from AJ.

Bob Armstrong, ANOTHER NWA representative, comes out here and says the titles are held up. Next week it’s Truth vs. Monty Brown for the title. Also next week it’s Styles vs. Lynn in a #1 contenders match for the X Title and Lynn says it should be falls count anywhere. AJ wants it No DQ on top of that, but THAT’S NOT ENOUGH, so Armstrong makes the third fall a ten minute Iron Man match. That’s an official NWA decision, so did Armstrong have that in his pocket just in case two other stipulations were suggested by the wrestlers? Jarrett whines and gets a mystery opponent next week.

Jarrett leaves with the tag titles and runs into Brian Lawler who chokes him and promises to kill Jarrett to end the show. In case you’re curious, Jarrett wouldn’t wrestle next week because these authority figures have no actual authority.

Overall Rating: F. I’m in awe of this show. I didn’t think they could get worse than last week, but that looks like 2000 Raw by comparison. Where do I begin? We had FOUR different Dupp appearances tonight. FOUR TIMES! On top of that we had Ricky Steamboat in charge last week, Cowboy Behrens in charge to start the show and Bob Armstrong in charge to end the show. On top of THAT, other than the main event and Lynn vs. AJ and something about Jarrett, there is nothing interesting or thought out at all here. Horrible show and after this one, the financial backers pulled out. Can you blame them?

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