Dynamite – April 5, 2023: How To Be Happy
Dynamite
Date: April 5, 2023
Location: UBS Arena, Long Island, New York
Commentators: Taz, Tony Schiavone, Excalibur
We’re back in Long Island and this should be a heck of a show as the card is stacked. We have more than a few interesting things in the lineup this week, including MJF Day, FTR vs. the Gunns in a career vs. Tag Team Title match and Tony Khan making his latest huge announcement. Let’s get to it.
Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.
Opening sequence.
Ricky Starks vs. Juice Robinson
And never mind as Robinson comes in from behind, with Jay White coming in through the entrance to jump Starks. The beating is on and Starks is left laying. No match.
We look back at Adam Cole returning to the ring last week and Chris Jericho coming out for the quick stare post match.
Jericho talks about Cole being back and getting the win….and here is Keith Lee to interrupt. Lee talks about facing Cole before and not liking Jericho’s disrespect. A challenge is laid out for next week. Lee doing something other than feuding with Swerve Strickland is a nice change of pace.
Trios Titles: House Of Black vs. Orange Cassidy/Best Friends
The House, with Julia Hart, is defending. Trent strikes away at Black to start before handing it off to Chuck for an enziguri to King. Cassidy and Buddy come in to complete the three sets of pairings. The sunglasses are thrown at Matthews and everything breaks down. Cassidy clears the ring but Trent is launched into King, who knocks him out of the air as we take a break.
Back with King accidentally suicide diving onto his partners, allowing Cassidy to be tossed onto all three champions. A triple powerbomb plants Matthews and Cassidy gives Black the lazy kicks. Cassidy Orange Punches King into Trent’s piledriver for two. Chuck rolls Matthews up for two more but gets Stomped by Matthews for the pin to retain at 11:34.
Rating: C+. This was what you would expect from a Trios Title match as the House gets another win. It’s a little strange to have one of the other popular teams fall to the champs again, as they’re running through challengers fairly quickly. There are some more challengers out there, but the big ones are going away in a hurry. For not though, Chuck taking a fall to the champs is a fine way to go and builds the House up a bit more.
Christian Cage is back….and so is Luchasaurus, though they don’t say anything.
Women’s Title: Jamie Hayter vs. Riho
Hayter, with Britt Baker, is defending. Riho snaps off a hurricanrana to start and they go to the pinfall reversal sequence for two each. Hayter is sent outside for a big dive to the floor but Hayter pulls another one out of the air back inside. They fight to the apron with Riho’s suplex being countered into a Rock Bottom as we take a break.
Back with Riho hitting a 619 and snapping off a dragon suplex for two. The hard sliding lariat gives Hayter two of her own but Riho counters a suplex into a DDT. Riho knocks her off the top and hits the running knees in the corner for two as Hayter has to put her foot on the rope. Hayter plants her down for two more and the Hayterade retains the title at 12:12.
Rating: B-. Hayter is back (after visa issues kept her out so the absence isn’t on AEW) and gets a win over someone with some status so the champ gets a nice boost. It’s better than dealing with the Outcasts again, but that’s probably coming sooner rather than later as it’s the biggest deal in the women’s division at the moment. For now though, Hayter looking strong is what matters.
The Outcasts mock Hayter retaining and want the title, even though there are three of them.
Here is the Jericho Appreciation Society to get the Acclaimed’s response. Cue the Acclaimed, with the rap not being the most positive towards the Society. Before we can get the response though, Angelo Parker announces that the four of them will be having an eight man tag on Rampage. Scissoring, without the Society, ensues. So that’s two advertised things they’ve punted on tonight.
We see MJF getting the key to the city of his hometown on Long Island. That’s pretty awesome.
A swing band play MJF, in a white tuxedo jacket, to start the MJF Show. MJF sings (about sunshine and ravioli) and seems rather happy to be here before dancing down to the ring. We have a CONGRATS MJF podium, a stand for the title, and a rather large key to Long Island on its own stand.
MJF introduces the Town Supervisor of Oyster Bay, who talks about how great MJF really is. MJF takes the podium and insults Jungle Boy before talking about how he has ADD. There was a teacher who would get on him over and over and laugh at him for not knowing an answer. On the last day of school, she asked where his brain went every day. That would be to professional wrestling, because he wants to be World Champion. She didn’t see it happening but her math seems to be a bit off.
If you’re a Long Island kid, and he’s only talking to them, just know that if you work hard, you can be anything you want….except MJF, because he’s better than you. MJF heads up the ramp and asks if we want an encore….but Jungle Boy has taken over the cymbals and the fight is on. Security breaks it up so here is Sammy Guevara (for his scheduled match) to hold up the World Title. This was one of the most bizarre things I’ve seen in wrestling in years and it worked….I think?
Komander vs. Sammy Guevara
Guevara sends him outside fast and hits the top rope moonsault. Back in and Komander superkicks him out of the air, setting up a rope walk shooting star press. Guevara goes outside so Komander walks the ropes again, only to get kicked out of the air as we take a break. Back with Komander having to bail out of another rope walk shooting star press before flipping onto raised knees. The GTH is countered into a small package but Guevara kicks him into the corner. Cue Darby Allin to watch as Komander walks the ropes again, only to get pulled out of the air with a cutter. The GTH finishes Komander at 8:13.
Rating: B-. Komander is obviously very talented, but walking the ropes so many times in a match kind of takes away the ooh/ahh factor. Guevara gets another win over an impressive opponent (that’s the theme of the night so far) and should be in line for the Double Or Nothing title shot. They still have some work to get there, but you can see the path they’re taking.
Post match Guevara says that’s something a World Champion doesn’t do: wrestle. Guevara talks about how MJF hasn’t beaten him, because it took Shawn Spears and a chair to beat him. We hear about all the people MJF has used to get here, as he has been people’s friends and parts of different groups. Guevara isn’t using this place to get anywhere, because he met his wife here and has won championships. So screw the other pillars, because he’s Sammy Guevara. If that was supposed to make the fans in attendance dislike MJF, it didn’t work.
FTW Title: Hook vs. Ethan Page
Hook is defending and Matt Hardy/Isiah Kassidy are in Page’s corner. Hook suplexes him to start and they head outside, with Page sending him into the steps. Page tries a Twist of Fate but Hook hits his own. Kassidy offers a distraction so Hardy hits Page with the belt, setting up Redrum to retain the title at 1:59.
We go to Nigel McGuinness (debuted at Ring Of Honor Supercard of Honor, announced as All Elite earlier today), who introduces Tony Khan. Five years ago, All In took the wrestling world by storm and now they’re doing it again, with AEW All In on August 27 in London. Adam Cole comes in to announce that the event will be in Wembley Stadium. That’s certainly an announcement, and they’ll have by far the biggest crowd they’ve ever had.
Blackpool Combat Club vs. ???/???/???
Bryan Danielson is here with the Club as the other three aren’t even introduced. The destruction is on, including a spike piledriver on the floor. Back in and Yuta grabs something like a crossface to win at 1:07.
Post match Danielson talks about how he was at home with his family, who he loves very much. He also loves the members of the team and professional wrestling. Danielson only sees a few professionals around here and they just beat up these people. Cue Hangman Page to get beaten down, with Danielson calling him an amateur against some professionals. Danielson whips out a screwdriver and says it’s time to fix things up from all of these amateurs (which he says over and over). Then he gouges the screwdriver into Page’s face and screaming ensues. Danielson continues to be great as a villain.
Tag Team Titles: FTR vs. Gunns
The Gunns are defending and it’s titles vs. careers. Colten runs Wheeler over to start and they head to the floor. Wheeler takes over but an Austin distraction lets Colten hit a dropkick to take over. Some right hands don’t get Wheeler very far and it’s a full nelson slam for two as we take a break.
Back with Harwood coming in off the hot tag to clean house, including a double DDT to Austin. The spike piledriver gives Harwood two and the Shatter Machine gets the same as the referee is pulled out. That’s not a DQ because the referee is smarter than that, so Wheeler is posted to put him down. Harwood and Austin trade rollups for two each until Austin hits him low, right in front of the referee.
The DQ is loaded up but Wheeler begs him to not do it. 3:10 To Yuma connects but Harwood makes the save. A title is slid in behind the referee’s back and Harwood’s diving headbutt hits the belt for two. Harwood spits at both of them but another 3:10 To Yuma is broken up. Wheeler comes in off the top with a super sunset flip for the pin and the titles at 13:58.
Rating: B. This started kind of slowly (which was strange as they didn’t have the amount of time you would expect from a match like this) but they went with the right ending. FTR winning with wrestling after all of the shenanigans fit perfectly and it made for the feel good moment to close the show. The title win was long (long, long) overdue and seeing FTR get the titles back feels right.
Streamers and Mark Briscoe are here to celebrate to end the show.
Overall Rating: B. They hit the high points here and had some good matches to go with them. This show was about setting things up for the future, plus getting in a cool moment at the end of the night. I had a good time with this one and now they can start getting ready for Double Or Nothing, which is already starting to take shape. Nice feel good show here, which is great after the debacle that was Raw and the downer ending of Wrestlemania.
Results
House Of Black b. Best Friends/Orange Cassidy – Stomp to Chuck
Jamie Hayter b. Riho – Hayterade
Sammy Guevara b. Komander – GTH
Hook b. Ethan Page – Redrum
Blackpool Combat Club b. ???/???/??? – Hammerlock Crossface
FTR b. Gunns – Double pin
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