One of the questions I get a lot is what DVDs do I think are good and which should people watch.  I figured I’d put together a post going over any WWE DVDs that I’ve seen and whether or not they should or shouldn’t be looked at.  This will include both the match listings and the documentaries, although I usually skip some of the matches as I’ve seen most of what is released.

These are in order from the list of WWE Home Videos from Wikipedia.  Remember: if I leave it off, it’s because I haven’t seen it.  Let’s get to it.

Bret Hitman Hart – Best There Is, Best There Was, Best There Ever Will Be

Three hours of Bret goodness.  Do I need to explain this?  If nothing else it has his matches with Owen and Austin from Wrestlemania if you haven’t picked them up on one of the 1000 other DVDs they’re on.  You also get some good matches with Steamboat and Perfect.  Definitely worth checking out.

Brian Pillman – Loose Cannon

I saw this once years ago and I barely remember it.  The documentary was good but the matches are just ok.  It has the Liger match from 1992 and the Canadian Stampede match which are his career highlights, but other than that it’s nothing great.

Hard Knocks – The Chris Benoit Story

This was one of the better DVDs you’ll ever see and was released just after he won the title at Wrestlemania.  It covers every major match of his career and has some absolute gems, including the Owen tribute match (also on Bret’s DVD), his match with Great Sauske from Japan, his WCW and World Title wins, and an awesome documentary about him returning home to Edmonton as world champion.  If you can sit through it (and find it), definitely worth looking up.

Cheating Death, Stealing Live – The Eddie Guerrero Story

This didn’t work as well as the Benoit DVD but it’s still not bad.  The documentary is better than the match selection, as you hear about Eddie’s drug abuse and personal demons leading up to his recovery and title win.  The matches…..I’m not sure about these.  The problem with the matches is it feels like WWE pulled some random matches out of a hat, threw in the Halloween Havoc 97 match and called it a day.  It’s good, but only the documentary is worth checking out, unless you haven’t seen Eddie vs. Rey from Havoc.

Jake the Snake Roberts – Pick Your Poison

I threw this on one Saturday afternoon when there was nothing good on TV and that’s about all it’s good for.  The documentary sounds more like a plea for sympathy than anything else and I heard a few holes in the stories he told which didn’t match up with the timeline of actual events.  The match selection is also pretty weak as when you think about it, Roberts didn’t have a lot of big matches.  If you’re interested in this you can get it for about $5 on Amazon, but I wouldn’t pay more than that (and I don’t think I did actually).

Mick Foley- Hard Knocks and Cheap Pops

This isn’t much actually as it’s more of a documentary than a definitive DVD, but we’ll get to that later on.  The matches here are nothing special other than the Mind Games match which we’ll revisit later on.  As much of a Foley fan as I am, I wouldn’t bother with this as it’s just over an hour and more of a quickie job you might get for like 2 bucks back in the old Blockbuster days.

NWO – Back in Black

If there has ever been a bigger hatchet job of a DVD, I’d love to know what it is.  This has a really good start with the 1996 stuff, then 1997 is covered in about 5 minutes, we hear about a moment in September of 1998, then it’s 2002 and the NWO is in the WWF.  The NWO is a VERY interesting subject which would make for a good 9 hour or so DVD, but this is just two and a half hours and definitely not worth looking for.  I watched it on the internet and actually went around seeing where the other parts were, because I didn’t believe they cut out as much as they did.  Definitely not worth any time or money.

Ric Flair – The Definitive Collection

This was the sequel to the Ultimate Flair Collection and it’s a different look at Naitch.  This is much more about his life than his in ring work, which is a very interesting subject to say the least.  There are some solid matches on it as well though, with stuff like his 94 match with Steamboat, the 89 Bash against Funk and COTC 1 vs. Sting.  If you pick this up though, pick up the Ultimate Collection as well to get the other major stuff that is included there.  Worth seeing though for the documentary alone.

Road Warriors – The Life and Death of the Most Dominant Tag Team in Wrestling History

As a Road Warriors fan, this was a must for me.  Again the documentary is the better part as the Warriors’ matches aren’t the kind of performances that you can make a long DVD about.  The problem is they squashed most of their opponents, so how can you really get excited after seeing the same things time after time?  The good thing here is it’s only two discs, which was the right call.  Good stuff here though and worth checking out if you’re a fan of the team, which you should be.

Born to Controversy – Rowdy Roddy Piper

Now THIS is what I’m talking about.  Piper is one of the most entertaining guys you’ll EVER see and this is a great set about him.  You get every major match in his career and a good documentary, but more than that you get TWENTY FOUR PIPER’S PITS.  If that doesn’t sell you on this, you’re in the wrong place.  You can get this for like 6 bucks online and I highly recommend it.  His book on the other hand, stay FAR away.

The Shawn Michaels Story – Heartbreak and Triumph

Considering there are at least three Shawn DVDs, it’s kind of hard to remember which is which.  I do remember liking this one though as it focuses more on his life than his matches.  That being said, it’s 9 hours of Shawn Michaels.  How could this not be good?  You also get a rarity with the Rockers winning the tag belts and the Shawn vs. Cena match from London in its entirety.  Good stuff here.

The Self-Destruction of the Ultimate Warrior

Then on the other hand there’s this one.  The problem here is that the WWF’s new stance is that Warrior was garbage and a flash in the pan.  Granted they didn’t mind making this flash in the pan the main event of Wrestlemania 6, the second main event on Wrestlemania 7 and th ebig surprise at Wrestlemania 8, but what difference should that make?  This is the DVD where they criticized him for wearing a baseball hat because apparently that made people not want to see him fight Jerry Lawler.  The DVD is nothing special but it’s pathetic hearing the company dump on him after all the money they milked out of him.

McMahon

Now this is a good one.  It’s two hours of praising Vince and how amazing he is.  If you know your history, this is one of the funniest DVDs ever, as Vince talks about backing out of the Georgia Championship Wrestling deal because “they didn’t want to do business” and other gems like that.  THe quality of the set is pretty low, but it’s absolutely hilarious to hear Vince spin things to benefit him.

Greatest Stars of the 80s/90s

These are two different sets but I figured it was easier to just do them together.  The idea is you’ll see a profile of a wrestler for about 10-15 minutes then later on, you get matches from that wrestler.  It’s a good way to show every major name from the generation in one set without getting into too much detail on what’s going on and boring the audience.  These are both fun and there’s a 21st century edition that is probably the same idea.  The 80s and 90s sets are both worth checking out with the 90s being a bit better and faster paced.

Starrcade – The Essential Collection

NOW we’re getting somewhere.  This is one of the few WWE DVDs that I went out and bought as soon as it hit the shelves.  The idea is it’s the top 25 Starrcade matches ever in a countdown format, with each five hosted by someone who was famous at Starrcade.  The match selection is questionable with some headscratchers in there and I still say Tully vs. Magnum should be #1, but it’s a WWE set and we have to praise Flair (even though his best Starrcade match isn’t even #1).  The documentary is…..odd.  Basically they spend 45 minutes talking about the first three shows, then 5 minutes on the next 14 of them and that’s it.  That being said, the first 45 minutes are GREAT and incredibly interesting stuff.  This is worth checking out, but I’d have Youtube open to find some other matches to supplement it.

The Monday Night War

This is one I’ve watched about ten times and it’s still interesting today.  The set mainly focuses on WCW, which is the smart thing to do as it was the dominant force for most of the War.  The problem is once we get past Warrior in WCW, there isn’t much to talk about other than WWF pounding WCW into the ground, so you know they spend a lot of time on it.  It’s a very solid set though and worth seeing if you haven’t before, if nothing else for the matches and extras (such as Cornette’s rants).

The Most Powerful Families in Wrestling

This is a lot like the Best of the 80s and the 90s.  Not much to say here and it’s not much to watch either.  The documentary isn’t bad but it’s not worth going out of your way to find.

Raw DVDs

There are a TON of DVDs on Monday Night Raw and I really can’t remember which I’ve seen and which I haven’t, so pretty much pick and choose.  I remember the 15th anniversary being good and I think I saw the top 100 moments DVD but I can’t remember for sure.

Rise and Fall of ECW

Anyone who follows me knows I do not like ECW.  However, this is one of if not the best DVDs WWE has ever produced.  It covers EVERYTHING about the company and has some fascinating stuff from behind the scenes.  If you haven’t seen this, go find it because I can’t recommend it strongly enough.

Rise and Fall of WCW

This is almost a sequel to Monday Night Wars and it’s not nearly as good.  Some of the logic on here is laughable with Hogan and Nash seemingly being blamed for almost everything that happened to WCW, which is absurd.  This is another version of WWE deciding how history goes, which gets old in a hurry.  Not worth seeing.

Top 50 Superstars of All Time

I think I watched this but I’m not 100% sure.  The list is confusing to say the least but it’s not bad.  Assuming I actually saw it that is.

Hulk Hogan – The Ultimate Anthology

Do I need to explain this?  9 hours of Hogan awesomeness.  Yes this is good.

Macho Madness – The Ultimate Randy Savage Collection

This would be another that I ran out and got when it came out and I’m glad I did.  This is the perfect Savage set with almost every major match in his career plus a solid documentary.  I don’t have much else to say here other than watch this and you’ll see why everyone speaks so highly of Savage.

Mick Foley’s Greatest Hits and Misses

THIS is what we needed to get to.  If there’s a great Foley match you want to see, it’s on this set.  Foley does some commentary on the matches which is very interesting stuff of course.  There’s a special Hardcore Edition of this with a third disc of his mid-2000s stuff which makes it even better.  Between this and his books, you can’t go wrong.  Check it out and read all four of his books as well.  Great set here.

The Ultimate Ric Flair Collection

I mentioned this earlier so I’ll keep this quick.  It’s 9 hours of Flair matches from the 80s and 90s and has some of the highest quality matches on any set you’ll ever find, making it well worth tracking down.

From the Vault: Shawn Michaels

This was one of the first WWE DVD sets and it’s  excellent.  You get the Cell vs. Undertaker, the ladder match against Razor, the Iron Man match, the Mind Games match, the no holds barred match against HHH, and one of my all time favorites in his street fight vs. Diesel, plus some solid extras.  This is one of my personal favorites and AWESOME stuff.

The Rock: The Most Electrifying Man In Sports Entertainment

I don’t remember much of this, but it’s 9 hours of the Rock with a ton of promos.  That enough for you?

Allied Powers

This is a showcase of tag team wrestling and it’s another solid release.  The problem here is it gets repetitive after awhile as you can only sit through so many tag matches in a row.  It’s the “documentary/match” formula again so it works ok, but I’d recommend watching it over a few days instead of at once.

Best of Saturday Night’s Main Event

Another great one, features everything it needs to feature, room for a sequel, great stuff all around.

History of the Intercontinental Championship/WWE Championship

Again it’s two different DVDs but they’re grouped together here.  Both are good enough but with subjects like this, you really can’t hit every highspot (and I would know, as I wrote a book about the WWE Championship.  Details on the front page) in such a long history.  These could both get sequels very easily.

Best of Smackdown: 10th Anniversary

This is a countdown bit with a look at the top 100 moments in the show’s history.  Some are matches and some are moments, but they cover pretty much everything ever on the show.  If you like Smackdown, you’ll like this.  I can’t get much simpler than that.

That’s about it.  As is the case with everything, some are hit and miss and your enjoyment will vary based on personal taste.  The best are Rise and Fall of ECW, Essential Starrcade and Foley’s set with Flair sprinkled in there somewhere.  Anyway, go watch some of these.

This could make for an interesting debate.In short, which means more: the time of Bubba Ray or the time as Bully Ray?  By that, I mean what means more: the TNA world title or all the tag titles and success he had with his brother?  Does beating Jeff Hardy mean more than all the TLC matches and ladder matches and main event spots as a tag wrestler that Bubba had?

For me it’s Bubba.  At the end of the day, Ray still hasn’t accomplished much on his own.  Yes he’s world champion, but that doesn’t mean he’s going to be a success as one, not with those nitwit bikers working for him.  He and D-Von own the record for most tag titles by so much that it’s unthinkable.  They main evented PPVs, they stole a lot of shows, and they were some of the biggest stars in ECW.  That trumps being champion of a glorified regional promotion.

Living Dangerously 2000
Date: March 12, 2000
Location: O’Neil Center, Danbury, Connecticut
Attendance: 4,000
Commentators: Joey Styles, Cyrus

The main story here is that the TV Title is vacant. Why is it vacant you ask? That would be because no one holds it at the moment. Tonight is about getting it some tender loving care. We’re trying to find someone that will curl up with it and give it the affection that it deserves.  For the less creepy version, RVD broke his leg/ankle so we’re having a TV Title tournament here. Other than that, this is the scaffold show with New Jack and Grimes, so expect a decent sized rant on that. Let’s get to it.

Sinister Minister (Abyss’ former manager) talks about the seven deadly sins of ECW. There’s a great long joke in there but I’ll spare you from it. Oh I forgot there’s a new massive heel stable: the Network, which is more or less a parody of TNN whining at Heyman over what they want. One funny line here is him getting to Wrath and says been there and done that (he managed a guy named Wrath in WCW. It didn’t go well.)

We hear Joey warming up the crowd and telling them to cheer. I know everyone does it, but come on now. Gertner says a few decent jokes but here’s Cyrus. He says excuse me a lot. Someone sue Vickie for trademark infringement. Are we ever going to get like, a fight between these two? Gertner just stands there and takes it of course like an idiot. Every time they say TNN I expect them to say TNA. Actually Gertner goes after him but Cyrus winds up hitting him when he’s not looking. Joey makes the save which is just odd.

Hit the theme song.

And here’s Steve Corino dressed like a cowboy. While he’s talking the audio messes up and we hear part of a Lou E. Dangerously promo. Paul…come on. Corino runs the fans down and in particular Sandman’s wife who is in the front row. Apparently she’s more of a man chase than Missy Hyatt and for you WCW fans, you get the idea.

Allegedly the Raven thing wasn’t an angle according to Corino. Dang his wife isn’t that attractive. She slaps him and he throws her in the ring. That girl wasn’t afraid to mix it up. There’s a table in the corner which I’m sure someone will go through. Sandman comes in to save her. And he gets a piledriver. His wife is gored through the table.

Not that we see it or anything but she’s standing in front of it, the camera jumps to the crowd, and we hear it being broken and they Rhyno is on her and the table is broken. The production values here are awful. Sandman gets his wife out of the ring and is likely going with her to the hospital.

This of course means he’s out of his tournament match, which is another bait and switch by Heyman but whatever. Corino now calls out Dusty Rhodes of all people. Oh that’s right they’re feuding. Also pay no attention to Dusty being everything ECW was supposed to be against.

Steve Corino vs. Dusty Rhodes

Should be noted the bell hasn’t rung yet and we’re 20 minutes into the PPV. This is a bullrope match too and it’s the pinning version thank goodness. There’s the bell at 20:40 of the PPV. Apparently Corino and Jack Victory beat up this referee at a house show. Dusty hits Corino with the cowbell. Know what I think we need now? NEEDS MORE COWBELL! Sorry I had to do that at least once.

And we’re already in the crowd. Steve is bleeding. I know he’s old school, but dang he could give Flair a run for his money in bleeding. Victory helps and it’s all about the cowbell. Is this a Christopher Walken special or something? This has been more in the crowd than in the ring of course. Dusty is bleeding now. Corino bites the cut over Dusty’s eye which I think is bleeding barbecue sauce instead of blood. And now it’s all about the blood.

Also, WHO CAME UP WITH THE STUPID COWBELL IDEA? I know it’s Dusty’s signature thing, but man I can’t stand this thing. Dusty is dominating by the way. Yeah the old guy that is in his mid fifties and hasn’t been a regular competitor in about ten years is beating a guy that is being groomed to be the top heel in the company.

Sure why not. Both guys have bells now. The referee helps Dusty tape a cowbell to the top of Corino’s head. And there’s a chair to the bell to the head. A Bionic Elbow ends it. Yes, the fat man goes over. I hate this company.

Rating: D. This was just stupid. Seriously, why is Dusty going over here? I know Corino isn’t as great as he’s made out to be, but there is ZERO justification here other than Dusty’s ego or position in the past or whatever. Why in the world would he need this win for a run in the company of all of four months? Just a bad match too with far too much cowbell (screw you Walken).

Sandman won’t be in the tournament tonight. Shocking.

Guido says he’ll win the title tonight.

Dangerous Alliance vs. Danny Doring/Roadkill

The Alliance is CW Anderson and Bill Willes. Yeah I don’t know the second guy either. The announcer looks like a mean gerbil apparently. Lou E. Dangerously can do a great Heyman impression but that’s about it. He says…nothing yet since the people are all booing him. Apparently the PPV is named after him. Can we get on with this? The fans won’t shut up to let him do his thing.

He does it and I don’t care at all. The Dangerous Alliance thing was at least a good idea. Elektra was hot if nothing else and Roadkill was always a funny gimmick for some reason. The Alliance is supposed to be a throwback to the original Dangerous Alliance back in 91-92 which had perhaps more pure talent than any other stable ever, and that’s including the Horsemen at their best. This Billy guy is worthless. He’s supposed to be the Bobby Eaton guy of this team? That’s very funny.

Also the non Alliance team has become face since the last show somehow. Anderson works on Doring’s arm so at least he’s got that part of the gimmick down. Anderson is an interesting guy and not bad in the ring. This Billy guy simply isn’t. Doring hits the Stroke but it’s called the G-Spot Sweet here. Oh dear. It all breaks down of course and the heels are in trouble.

Willes takes a Lancaster Lariat of Lust. I can’t make these names up. Roadkill goes up for his top rope splash but Elektra turns heel and crotches him, allowing Anderson to hit the spinebuster for the pin as Elektra joins them.

Rating: C+. I’m not sure why but I liked this. They kept this WAY reeled in and it worked quite well. It’s a basic story and it came off well. Maybe it’s just a basic wrestling match happening and my mind being blown by that. Maybe Elektra’s hips did that. I’m not sure, but this was fine.

The Impact Players promise to get their tag belts back. Dang Dawn was hot.

Simon Diamond vs. Kid Kash

Seriously, a gimmick based on Kid Rock? Could we not get Billy Joel or Englebert Humperdink? And here’s Mike Awesome. No one gets why, but here he is. Oh and he and Raven are the tag champions now to go with the world title. He actually says get out of the ring or die. Diamond and company bail, leaving us with this.

Kid Kash vs. Mike Awesome

Sure why not. Kash kicks out of the splash early. It’s all Mike here as you wouldn’t expect. Shouldn’t Kash get in at least an early flurry? Ah there we go. Kash could do high spots if nothing else. For some reason I liked him when I was 12. It was a very strange time.

Kash hits a modified Pedigree on Awesome’s manager but gets knocked the heck out by Awesome. Kash hits a rana which of course DOES NOTHING because that move is worthless and gets knocked out again. And there’s your table. Powerbomb through it in 3, 2, 1…yeah there it is. Awesome wins of course.

Rating: D. Well Awesome lives up to his name and Kash gets destroyed. Was there a reason to not have the original match or am I just missing something? Apparently this was a world title match too. Pay no attention to the fact that we’re not told this until the very end and by that I mean when they say he’s still champion but whatever.

Post match Jazz comes out to help Kash but Jado and Gedo, two guys from Japan come out with Diamond to beat up Jazz. Here’s Nova and Chetti for the save and of course it’s an impromptu match!

Jado/Gedo vs. Nova/Chris Chetti

I’ve heard incredibly mixed reviews on Jado and Gedo but I think I’ve seen one match of theirs and it was a 6 man. We hear about how great Gedo is and he’s got a decent resume actually with wins over Jericho, Benoit and Malenko. Joey: Nova and Chetti have been together as a team now for a year minus the six months Chetti was out with a back injury.

I think that’s grounds for just saying they’ve been together for awhile. They tag with other people though but it’s all good. The Japanese guys like to mock opponents apparently. Joey can you freaking say who is who? I think Gedo is in the ring but I’m not sure. This show has been such a train wreck I’m not sure. Ah never mind that’s Jado. Gedo has a shirt on. Got it.

Nova gets a NICE superkick to the throat of Jado. That looked great and sounded great too. Chetti tries one and does quite well too. His only missed by six inches or so. Cyrus doesn’t know the referee’s name which means nothing at all but I need to fill in some space here. The Tidal Wave hits Gedo to end it. It’s a combination splash and leg drop but both guys jump from the same rope. It looked pretty cool.

Rating: D+. This was just a mess. It wasn’t bad or anything, but it was just a total mess. I know I said that already but it’s the only way to put it. Why are the Japanese guys here? Why did Nova and Chetti pick this time to run down? How was a contract agreed to and sanctioned so fast? Yes I know I’m nitpicking but dang man. That’s two in a row with nothing but random match to explain it. That’s not good.

Dangerously talks about doing well tonight. Elektra is REALLY, REALLY bad at talking. Good grief SHUT UP ALREADY!

TV Title Tournament Semi–Finals: Little Guido vs. Super Crazy

Hey look: another cruiserweight match but this time there’s something close to meaning! The winner fights Rhyno for the title in the main event. The Network doesn’t like Crazy apparently. Crazy hits a great moonsault to the floor. Again this match is just all over the place and going so fast you can’t tell if anything is working or not.

We’re told that Heenan put vodka in his water cup. That explains a lot. Guido hooks a Fujiwara Armbar on Crazy on the floor to take over. See what I mean? That was decent, but it came and went so fast that it’s hard to tell if it was good or not. And there’s a chair. Wow we went awhile without many weapons tonight. Crazy gets the ten punches in Spanish and then does it again to Big Sal.

You have to give the ECW fans this: they were well rehearsed. During this fight for a belt we get a fight over a belt. See how low I have to sink for jokes here? Guido misses an elbow and goes through a table. A brainbuster and a moonsault gives us our finals.

Rating: C. So? That’s all I can say here. So freaking what? This match or a combination of these two and Tajiri has been on every show for like 8 months now. SO? I mean seriously, why in the world should I care? They had a decent match and then they’ll likely have more later. It’s entertaining and to be fair one is getting a midcard title shot, but I flat out do not see a reason to care one bit here.

Buy this video game! You can wrestle as Joey Styles! Yeah the game completely sucked as it was just War Zone but with ECW characters and blood.

W*ING Kanemura vs. Balls Mahoney

Kinemura is from FMW and is something close to a hardcore legend. THIS gets a big match intro? Joey insists that this will be a hardcore match. Thanks Joey as I never would have guessed that. Kanemura hits a nice senton from the top. Oh and his first name is Kintaro here. He’s more known as W*ING though (and yes that’s the real spelling) so I’ll go with that. Not like it matters though as it’s a 2 minute match with a sitout powerslam ending it with Balls getting the win.

Rating: N/A. Just nothing here but a transitional thing to this.

The Baldies run in and beat up Balls but here’s New Jack and THAT FREAKING SONG. This is a very infamous moment so I’m not going to call this an actual match or anything. Expect a long rant later on. New Jack beats them up with stuff including a Playstation and I don’t care at all.

We fight over a pizza cutter for a bit and this is just wasting my time. Come on I have the Smackdown Pilot waiting on me but I have to do this first. And let’s go into the crowd because that hasn’t been done at all tonight. And now we get to the famous part of this, as we fight to a scaffolding.

There are two tables set on top of each other and they climb up the scaffolding. It should definitely be noted that it’s just that: a scaffold. In scaffold matches there was usually at least something solid to stand on. This is a beam that is only a few inches wide. They’re both clearly scared to death and I can’t blame them.

This is one of the scariest things I’ve ever seen. And there it is. New Jack I guess tries a suplex off the scaffold. It doesn’t work. At all. New Jack completely misses the tables and lands feet first. Grimes on the other hand lands on his head, and I mean both versions of his. Grimes lands head first and his body lands on New Jack’s head. Both guys are of course completely unconscious and we go to a wide shot while medics come in.

Remember that Grimes weighs about 400lbs. Sure let’s show replays and keep the freaking song going while the fans cheer. New Jack had brain damage and was at least temporarily blinded by this. It resulted in him attempting to severely injure or even kill Grimes (his words) at another show after ECW closed. This brings the show to a complete halt and lets the fans cheer incessantly.

So again we have violence for the sake of violence and stunts for the sake of stunts. And look what happened: two guys were almost killed because of it. But hey, the people are cheering right? Hey, people are going to buy more New Jack stuff now because he’s hardcore right?

This is another example of having no regard or respect for the lives of workers. Having them stand on a two inch bar 20 feet in the air is just flat out irresponsible, negligent and arguably criminal. Why in the world did we need to do this? Ah yes: we needed to top what we did last month.

Seriously, why do we have to do this? Instead of a regular wrestling match, we had to see a crutch to the balls and a vacuum shot to the back before we dive twenty feet and nearly kill two men. Not only that, but in a promotion called XPW, they had another match and New Jack tried to kill him for revenge.

And these incidents happened on a professional wrestling show. What do these things have to do with professional wrestling? I’ve yet to see any connection between being slammed into the concrete from a scaffold and a wrestling match. This was just flat out not needed and the fact that they didn’t die, which isn’t an exaggeration as allegedly a six inch difference would have killed New Jack, is a perk is just not acceptable.

After Joey and Cyrus stall for time, it’s time for the three way dance.

Tag Titles: Tommy Dreamer/Masato Tanaka vs. Impact Players vs. Mike Awesome/Raven

So the Impact Players were the champions and Tanaka/Dreamer beat them and held the belts for a week. Then Awesome and Raven took the belts and are defending here. They won them 8 days ago so the Impact Players lost the titles just over two weeks ago. Raven and Awesome hit the ring at a sprint and we’re already going. Awesome takes out Justin and Jason in a nice looking dive.

Dreamer gets a nice pop and here are the other former champions who were just thrown together but that makes them a great team of course. We get a Rocky Horror reference and Cyrus points out that the Players are the only real team here. Raven and Dreamer fight in the ring which just feels right.

Awesome goes through a table as it’s just a massive mess rather than anything close to a coherent match. The Roaring Elbow puts Awesome and Raven out in like 4 minutes. Ok then. So get the nameplates ready for the Impact Players again. Oh come on like they’re going to lose to Dreamer and Tanaka. Dreamer is bleeding. Justin botches a spinning DDT to the complete lack of shock from me.

Hey look: TAGGING IN A TAG TEAM MATCH! Dreamer hits some stuff to make the hot tag and Jason comes in to make it 3-2 which is just fine. Tanaka beats them both up just because he can and we’re doing nothing but near falls already. A kendo stick to the head of Dreamer puts him down and at least we get Diamond Dust so I can be somewhat happy.

A belt shot and spike piledriver to Dreamer give the Players the belts back. Cyrus runs down to celebrate. The belts would be vacated in about a month when Justin won the world title and wouldn’t be replaced for about four months, so you won’t see a PPV tag title match for a good while.

Rating: D. Again just a total mess here that nothing came from. Also this lasted 9 more minutes. Everything has flown by here and there has been no substance to anything whatsoever. Also, why drop the belts if you’re just going to get them back in two weeks anyway? Ah right: it’s ECW. I just don’t care again here.

ECW TV Title Tournament Finals: Rhyno vs. Super Crazy

Cyrus just stayed in the ring and introduced this so there was almost no transition at all. Now common sense booking would say Sandman interferes here and costs Rhyno the belt. The fans get this too so they cheer for Sandman the majority of the match, completely taking the focus off of the guys in the match.

Before the match though Paul comes out and cusses out Cyrus, dropping about 5 F Bombs in just over a minute. And here’s Gertner to yell at Cyrus as well. He doesn’t do anything of course, but here’s Super Crazy. I’ll give them points for elevating a midcard guy, but no one cares as neither guy has beaten RVD so there’s no point to this really. The company is completely dead at this point but they kept going for about another 10 months or so.

And Crazy dominates the monster with flips and stuff as the fans chant for Sandman. It’s table time already and Crazy goes through it. Rhyno hits a nice powerbomb for two. The Triple Moonsault hits and down goes the referee. Tajiri comes down and mists Crazy then kicks him. Oh look: ANOTHER table.

Rhyno mocks RVD, which of course brings him out to make whoever wins this look even less important. Scotty freaking Riggs comes in to help and RVD puts Rhyno through a table. Great way to make him look important. Crazy hits a moonsault to win the title.

He would hold it for a month then Tajiri would hold it for two weeks and then Rhyno would hold it for a full year save for a two week reign by Kid Kash in August. Rhyno beats everyone up afterwards and here’s Sandman who breaks the stick over his head. Metallica plays and the faces celebrate to end the show after two hours and twenty minutes. WOW.

Rating: D. I never would have dreamed it possible but this was somehow worse than the previous stuff. It had at least four different people running in and four tables used. What’s the point of having a champion again? This was just bad and RVD beating up Rhyno on one good leg is just idiotic. The Sandman chants didn’t help either. Horrible finish to a horrible PPV.

Overall Rating: F+. Where do I start? For one thing, the longest match of the night is the Bull Rope match at ten minutes and thirteen seconds. After that it’s the tag title match which is in essence a 2/3 falls match at 9 minutes and three seconds. Other than that I don’t think anything broke 8 minutes in length.

SERIOUSLY? You end a PPV at 10:20 which includes a long opening segment and a highlight package at the end and you have DUSTY FREAKING RHODES win the longest match of the night? Like I said throughout this review, it felt like they were in a rush all night. What could they possibly have been rushing to? They could have had another thirty minutes on this show but instead almost everything stays under 9 minutes?

Are you telling me you couldn’t add five more minutes to the tag titles? Or to Guido vs. Crazy? Or geez had ANOTHER MATCH? Dang even add five minutes to the Mahoney/Kanemura match and it would have helped. I get that the botch (which I’ll spare you more complaining about) in the New Jack thing made them run short, but you can’t thrown two guys out there for a squash or something?

Even with the intros and such it would have filled in some time. Or even have some promos and it gets better. Just give us SOMETHING dude. Was there a reason for the Sandman/Rhyno match not happening? Don’t tell me an injury, because it’s not like Sandman matches require a ton of actual wrestling or anything. Just a horrible PPV and the worse ECW show in a LONG time.

Living Dangerously 1998
Date: March 1, 1998
Location: Asbury Park Convention Center, Asbury Park, New Jersey
Attendance: 3,700
Commentator: Joey Styles

It’s been about four to five months since our last outing and only one thing has really changed: Al Snow. He’s risen to prominence now with the Head gimmick and he is having a match tonight with Kronus to showcase himself. Also Storm is feuding with Candido because Storm got thrown out of his spot as a Triple Threat prospect.

Also we have Taz vs. Bigelow for the TV Title in Bigelow’s home town. That could be good. The company has lost its pass now for being a young company since their last two PPVs have looked good and been decent, so it’s now a regular grade and not an ECW adjusted one. Let’s get to a show that I’d guess is named after Heyman’s alter ego. Let’s get to it.

We open with a shot from last night apparently of Taz walking into the empty arena and saying he’s ready. Isn’t that called breaking and entering? I think this is supposed to be based on Rocky but I’m not sure. Oh wait it’s from Philadelphia. Of course it’s a Rocky reference.

Joey opens the actual show and the arena looks really good. It’s well lit and looks very full, which makes me think there were like 8 people on the camera side. We get the intro video and song and we’re ready to go.

Jerry Lynn/Chris Chetti vs. F.B.I.

Chetti was the first graduate of the House of Hardcore, the ECW wrestling school, which I know because Joey says that Chris Chetti was the first graduate of the House of Hardcore, the ECW wrestling school. The F.B.I. are all dancing for some reason. This is Guido and Smothers in case you were wondering.

Lynn had little credibility at this point but he was getting more popular. Chetti is introduced as the first graduate of the House of Hardcore, the ECW wrestling school. The fans don’t like Smothers, like at all. Maybe Lynn has more credibility at this point than I thought. Ok the WOO for chops is getting annoying.

Lynn takes out both guys with a nice looking dive from the top. Rich accidentally nails Chetti. Wait what? That’s what Joey said but it makes no sense. That’s not something I usually have to say about him. He annoys me but to be fair he doesn’t make many huge mistakes. Also to be fair, another guy up there might catch his errors, which are understandable.

Chetti hooks a small package but Lynn messes up and has the referee. Again Chris gets the cover on a rollup but there’s no referee. Chetti gets a nice spot where he runs up the corner and comes back with a reverse leg lariat. That was pretty sweet. He finally gets the hot tag to Lynn who cleans house including a jumping back elbow which makes him awesome. Rick comes in with an Italian flag but the shot misses and hits Guido, giving Lynn a rollup for the win.

Rating: C+. Not bad at all. It was pretty fast paced and formula based so everything went fine there. It got the crowd into the show which is never a problem that this place has so that kind of makes these matches redundant. Even still, this was fine.

Joey says Wing Kanemura isn’t here so of course we get a video package anyway on him. He’s not here. Ok then.

Lance Wright, some jerk in a bad suit that says he works for Vince, says that tonight it’s Doug Furnas vs. Tanaka. This guy is really annoying.

Masato Tanaka vs. Doug Furnas

So I watched the whole match before I started writing about it and the only word to describe it is sloppy beyond all belief. I mean they botch a ton of stuff here and it’s not like they’re little spots. They botch BIG spots. Tanaka tries for a tornado DDT but it turns into them just falling all over each other.

I guess you can chalk some of this up to them having limited time to prepare, but at the same time these are pros and shouldn’t have to deal with things like this. The fans are booing the heck out of this match and I can’t say for a second that I blame them. It’s just amateurish looking to say the least.

A botch here and there is one thing but this is awful. Tanaka ends this nightmare with a roaring elbow. Ok so it wasn’t all botches but still there were FAR too many in here to be acceptable. Post match Wright talks about WWF higher ups and Furnas nails him before putting on an ECW shirt, and I’m assuming defecting or something like that.

Rating: D. The botches just killed it and in a match that doesn’t even go for six minutes that just sucked the life out of this one for me. This just wasn’t worth a PPV time slot but again to be fair they didn’t know that this would be the match. They at least realized the match sucked and ended it before it got out of hand.

Ad for the Hardcore Hotline. Also, you can get a FREE merchandise catalogue. That’s actually smart. Wrestlepalooza, which might be the best name ever, is in two months which is the shortest layoff yet so that’s a good sign.

We can’t air Sandman vs. Sabu because it’s graphic. Keep that in mind.

Nicole Bass, an annoying chick that thought she was a hot Chyna and Jason, an annoying guy, show up and demand that we see a tape. It’s of Dreamer showing up without Beaulah. Yeah that’s it. Tommy has his dog with him. That’s just cool for some reason.

Rob Van Dam vs. 2 Cold Scorpio

Van Dam is still a huge heel here but it’s lightening up a lot. Scorpio is over as free beer in a frat house. He’s Flash Funk at this point but here he’s just the simple 2 Cold Scorpio and therefore much better than he was in WWF. The more I hear the more I think Van Dam is already a face. They start with a long feeling out process which is fine as they do some decent technical stuff.

However, we of course get a botch because it’s ECW. Those things just suck the life out of a lot of matches. I understand that they are going to happen and at least here they covered it up a bit. In the previous match they just assumed no one noticed and thought it would be fine. That’s just freaking dumb. We get a very nice reversal sequence with a lot of monkey flips that ends with a standoff.

Very nice indeed. We hit the floor and Van Dam is in the crowd. Well you knew it was going to happen sooner or later I guess. I think they’re going for the big epic match here but the fans aren’t all happy with it which can’t be a good sign. To be fair though, most of the time not all fans are going to love the thing. The fans want Sandman apparently. That sums up ECW crowds pretty well.

We’re given a high flying technically mostly sound match, and the fans want weapons and blood and tables. So many times these fans were just ridiculous and stupid and this is one of them. Scorpio hits a SWEET moonsault. The Five Star which isn’t called that yet gets knees or what are called knees I suppose as it looked like it hit pretty well to me. We hit the ramp for awhile and the Van Daminator is more or less no sold. Hint for how to counter: HIT HIM WITH THE CHAIR. Seriously dude, use some freaking intelligence.

A piledriver on the ramp and Van Dam is hurt. And there goes the referee because in a no DQ match we need a referee for…? Van Dam tries to steal the 450 and would have missed completely anyway. Scorpio mostly hits the 450 and here’s Sabu to up the workrate. An Arabian Facebuster gets two. Sandman comes out to chase off Sabu. Van Dam gets a SWEET jumping rollup for the pin. Post match Van Dam acts very cocky and offers a handshake but Scorpio nails him to a big pop.

Sabu comes back with a table so they try to put Scorpio through it. Naturally this doesn’t work as Sandman makes the save. In a stupid moment, as Scorpio is laying on it and Sandman makes the save, he pops up as soon as Sandman is here. Yeah that didn’t look dumb at all. Sandman tries a hurricanrana from the top through the table on Sabu. Guess what happens. Go ahead and guess. Anyway, the two faces share a beer after the match. Sandman dances. This is disturbing.

Rating: B-. This was good, but it suffers from the same problem that it always does: Paul Heyman overbooking it. Can ANYONE explain to me why Sabu and Sandman had to come in there? I know RVD and Sabu are partners, but he had no business coming to ringside at all.

The match was rather good until they went to the floor and it became just another brawl. Why is wrestling so hard to do when you have two guys that are really good at it? I get that it’s a hardcore company, but at the end of the day it’s a wrestling company and should be about wrestling.

Ok so see if you can follow this one. That’s not me talking, that’s how Heyman starts the next video package. Are you freaking kidding me? The idea is that Storm was a Triple Threat (top heel stable) prospect and won the tag titles with Candido who was in Triple Threat.

Sunny showed up and got Candido to go insane and beat up Storm so they’re still champions but hate each other. I didn’t know Russo worked for ECW. Tonight there’s a tag match where they’re on other sides and both get to pick partners. The winners get nothing at all. They would hold the titles another THREE MONTHS before losing them. You think that’s long enough?

Dudley Boys vs. New Jack/Spike Dudley vs. Hardcore Chair Swingin Freaks

It’s elimination rules of course. Gertner’s intro is hilarious for Big Dick Dudley: “The man who last night took such liberties with YOUR mother that he is now legally your father in 17 states.” That is just awesome. About himself: “More tongue in cheek than a lesbian orgy” and “Joel, your girlfriend has me on speed dial because she loves the way I star 69 her, Gertner.” This guy is awesome.

He follows that up with “Currently getting jiggy with it to my left,” seriously, sign this guy now. The intro takes like 8 minutes but it’s hilarious. Balls and Axl come out and the brawl is on early. And after some ok stuff here’s New Jack with his weapons to screw the whole thing up. Oh dang it we have to listen to the freaking song again don’t we. Yep we do.

The music really throws things off as it keeps making me think that something important is happening or that the team who came out to it are winning. And yep it’s all weapons now. Spike keeps jumping all over the place because that’s the only thing he can do to make sense here. And now all six go into the crowd. Ok then. We’re at the merchandise stand now and Spike and New Jack dive like 15 feet to the floor through tables through the Dudleys.

Ok, when Mankind did it, it was cool. This was just mindless violence being substituted for wrestling. Keep in mind that ten minutes into this match the sang song is still playing. An Acid Drop through a table gets two for Spike as Bubba saves it since they want to eliminate Balls and Axl. And a 3D does just that. Twin guitar shots and an Acid Drop and a chair from the top ends this mess.

Rating: D. I hate these things. They’re just complete garbage and more than anything else, I hate that song. Why is this considered interesting or good or anything like that? Anyway, this was just like every other one of these that they did as in it was completely pointless and mindless crap.

We get a big long package about Justin Credible who was pushed to the freaking moon for years. The problem: the fans didn’t care or buy it. Why didn’t they? Simply put: he wasn’t any good. He was average as can be and that’s it.

Justin Credible vs. Tommy Dreamer

Jenna Jameson is the new reporter. Justin Credible comes out and says he has Beaulah so who needs Jenna. I would agree actually. Nicole Bass and Jason are with him and I honestly thought Bass was a man at first. Jenna tries to act tough and it just fails. Dreamer comes out and I have to hear her consistently say Tommy I love you (for those of you that don’t know, that’s my first name).

He kisses her and Joey says Dreamer goes where every man has gone before which made me laugh. Dreamer actually hits a plancha as we have a priest in the front row and we keep hearing about how Justin crossed a line. That amuses me to no end. And hey, what a shock, it’s a brawl. AGAIN Joey talks about the Sandman vs. Sabu match that we can’t show. Let it be made clear: WE CANNOT SHOW IT.

Yeah just remember that. Dreamer hits a running dropkick to the chair while Justin is in the Tree of Woe. We get kind of a Raven spot as Dreamer gets hit with a drop toehold into a chair. Ok, Justin doesn’t deserve to be WOOED on chops. Neither does Tommy to be fair. They use a chair for about ten spots in a row because that just makes things better or whatever. Dreamer hits a DEATH VALLEY Driver (screw that Spicolli nonsense. He was a drug addict and died after taking too many drugs.

He’s not some saint that deserves to be canonized. Let it go already.) which Justin no sells. The spinning, which adds nothing to it that I can see, tombstone hits and here’s Beaulah. She hits Justin low and does the same to Jason before DDTing him. Nicole puts her in a bearhug which she manages to botch.

Bass falls out of her top as Mikey Whipwreck, who feuded with Justin but has no bearing here comes in for the save. He has a bad leg and Justin breaks a crutch over his cast before Dreamer hits a DDT for the pin.

Rating: D+. What was the point of this again? I forgot with all the chair shots and nonsense going on. This was just more mindless fighting that nothing actually came from. I’m not huge on that as it just was stupid. And I like Tommy.

We get the same ad from earlier for the catalogue and PPV which apparently wasn’t supposed to air then.

Now we get what was supposed to air: Bigelow vs. Taz which was because Bigelow was getting beaten up by Triple Threat so he asked Taz to be his partner to fight them. Taz gets a great line: “I’m not gonna be your partner. I’m gonna be your savior.”

Keep in mind that was in his shouting voice. After Taz beats up Shane and says he wants to be world champion (the match didn’t happen for almost another year) Bigelow jumps him and reveals it was all a setup to stop Taz. That makes sense I guess.

TV Title: Taz vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

Remember that Bigelow is the hometown boy. I love how they announce Bigelow’s weight and Joey says a different one during the match. That always amuses me for some reason. Bigelow hits a great powerbomb. He was always great at that move. Shame Diesel was using it in WWF so Bigelow couldn’t do it. This is a long brawl but there’s some wrestling in there to balance it out I guess.

They hit the crowd for awhile and actually Taz gets some solid cheers. And then Bigelow gets suplexed off the ramp and to the floor and both nearly die. Because that’s clearly the big ratings draw here right? We go back to the ring and Bigelow uses power stuff which Taz gets to suplex his way out of. See, THAT is how Taz looks good: when it’s Shane or some small guy that he’s throwing around it just gets repetitive.

The suplexes are leverage moves and now he’s getting to show what he can do with that leverage, making it seem far more important. The tables are brought in as we just have to have those because the wrestling here clearly isn’t good enough. We brawl on the floor AGAIN as I grow to hate Heyman even more. It’s ok to just wrestle in the ring guys. The fans are really restless here as they were popping like cherries for the wrestling stuff.

Case in point: Taz takes a sign to the head, fans are dead/booing. They trade punches, crowd cheers. See? It’s not hard to just have wrestling. Tazmission is locked in and Bigelow drops him through the ring. They climb out and Bigelow pulls Taz up for the easy pin. It looked cool and the fans all freaked out over it, but Bigelow couldn’t win with his shoulder piledriver to give us a standard ending? I hate that.

Rating: D+. The brawling was just too much here. This match wanted so badly to be good but the brawling and the tables and the over the top nature of it just killed the thing. Paul just refused to accept the idea of two good wrestlers just getting out there and wrestling and that’s what wound up killing him off in the end. Sometimes the fans just want wrestling and while Paul tried to do that, he went too far most of the time and it killed things.

Heyman runs up and says the Kronus vs. Snow is cancelled and we’re going to see Sandman vs. Sabu from before the PPV, the PPV that the censors said WE CANNOT SEE. Ok, a few questions here. Number one, there was more adult stuff on PPV yet this is inappropriate? Number two, if this is such a hot feud, which it was I guess, why not have this on the PPV?

If they were upset that it couldn’t be shown, why would you film it and not air it? Everything else is live, so why wasn’t this? I get in something like UFC where they have the prelim fights taped in case something goes like 10 seconds. That makes sense as it’s a legit concern and if something like that does happen, they have something that they can plug in and give the fans a legit PPV.

However, you wouldn’t put St. Pierre in a prelim match that MIGHT make air. This whole thing with Joey constantly saying we can’t air it but there just happens to be full commentary for it anyway makes me shake my head. I guess if you think about it enough it could make sense, but you shouldn’t have to think that hard about it which is the point.

Sabu vs. Sandman

This is dueling canes. Sabu hits the ring second and gives him some fairly weak cane shots. And as Sandman takes over…Sabu runs in for the save? The first guy is RVD in disguise. That’s actually brilliant. Alfonso sends Van Dam to the back despite them destroying Sandman. That makes sense right? Anyway, this is your standard weapons/garbage match because neither can work more than two minutes without them.

Wait, where are the canes? I see no canes. Oh that’s right. It’s freaking ECW, meaning there’s no logic at all. It’s just Sabu beating up Sandman for about 10 minutes before Van Dam comes out to help him. There’s just nothing to talk about here at all as it’s terrible. Sabu beats up Sandman some more and the crooked ref of the week comes out to count the pin. This was awful.

Rating: F. What was the point of the canes match or whatever? What was the point of any of this actually? I just don’t get the point here at all as it wasn’t any good and it was just more mindless brawling which seems to be the theme for the show.

Back in the arena, everyone has Styrofoam Heads. Styles yells at Heyman for showing the match that the censors wanted to keep off the air. Apparently they didn’t fix the ring but the main event is happening anyway. Styles says he quits if this happens again with Paul. It’s convincing if you don’t think about it I guess.

Chris Candido/Shane Douglas vs. Lance Storm/???

Two guesses as to who Storm’s partner is given the heads out there. And the partner is Sunny, and you can see the screwjob from here. Storm and Candido do their usual thing which means its cool. Sunny comes in and we don’t have the catfight with Francine. OF COURSE Sunny makes the swerve that no one bought. The fans chant that they want Head.

For some reason they give Storm a mic while he’s in a camel clutch and as Candido asks what he’s going to give him, Storm says he’s going to give him head. And yep, Snow comes out. However, for no reason at all, they keep spinning the camera upside down at random intervals. It’s REALLY confusing and annoying. So after about a three minute brawl with Snow’s music playing and Shane falling through the hole in the ring, Snow gets the pin with a Snow Plow. The celebration ends the show.

Rating: N/A. This was way too short and way too over the top to grade. With the camera spinning and the lights going out I couldn’t really keep track of it. Seriously though, this was the main event: a four minute brawl that ends with a quick pin. That sums up everything to me.

Overall Rating: D. There was one title match and a 4 minute main event. How in the world does this validate a PPV show? This show had the skeleton of a good show there, but it just failed to deliver one. To be fair though, I think it’s because of Heyman more than anything else.

He just can’t let things stay the way they should be and it’s killing him. There just doesn’t need to be a chair or a big angle all the time and it weakened the show badly here. I wanted to like this show but I just couldn’t do it. They tried but they were running with an anchor. Only for ECW fans.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Cyberslam 1998
Date: February 21, 1998
Location: ECW Arena, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentator: Joey Styles

I downloaded this like three months ago and never got around to reviewing it. I also have the 99 version and November to Remember 1995 which is allegedly the best ECW show ever and I’ll be getting to those this week I hope. Anyway, this is the internet convention or whatever and it’s basically just a really big house show. As you all know I’m not that fond of ECW’s PPV years so let’s get to it.

Don’t like the company, still dig that freaking theme song.

We start with the ring filling up for a ten bell salute to Louie Spicolli who died 6 days before this show. Whoa wait: DROZ worked for ECW? Heyman talks about how there’s a group that talks about being a member of it for life. It’s a nice marketing line but in ECW that’s reality. This show is dedicated to Louie Spicolli and there’s a Louie chant. Ten bell salute goes off.

Danny Doring vs. Jerry Lynn

Lynn is “Dynamic” here. Was he ever not old? Even here he’s 35. Technical stuff to start and Doring struts a bit, which is called the Dastardly Shuffle by Joey. Dang those fans are loud. Lynn makes fun of the Shuffle and we get into some technical stuff. Roadkill trips Lynn but Doring misses a bottom rope (yes bottom rope) elbow. Rather back and forth stuff here as Lynn takes over again.

Suplex gets two and a headbutt misses to let Doring take over again. On the floor Roadkill and Doring mess up and the heels go into the crowd. Lynn is like cool dude and gets a running start off the apron and dives over the railing with a flip dive to take them both out. Lynn misses a middle rope leg drop and Doring takes over again. Tiger Bomb gets two for Doring but he might have hurt his elbow.

The distraction lets Roadie come in and hit a walk the top rope (AmishTaker according to Joey) elbow which the referee misses somehow. Doring of course has to be a jerk and wastes time so it’s only a two count. Doring puts him on top and Lynn hits a sunset bomb for the pin out of nowhere. Oh apparently Doring is afraid of heights. Got it. Makes limited sense but got it.

Rating: C. Meh match here but it wasn’t bad. Lynn is solid in the ring but Doring is just a wrestler and not that interesting in the slightest. Nothing match here but that doesn’t mean it was bad. They needed more to work with and Doring needs WAY more charisma, which he wouldn’t really get. Decent enough opener though.

Al Snow vs. Tracy Smothers

Al is in the middle of the push of a lifetime which would ultimately fail because Shane Douglas HAD to lose the title to Taz and NO ONE ELSE so Al’s push was wasted but whatever. Tracy is part of the FBI and is more or less a comedy character. The fans do the mannequin head rave thing. The entrance is taking forever. The ring is full of the heads now.

And now let’s keep the rave thing going and START THE SONG AGAIN. Snow clears the ring and shakes the head a lot. Somehow there’s a chair in the ring and we go through the introductions. All of Smothers’ entourage get introductions also. And let’s stall some more now. The bell has already rung by the way. The FBI leaves and Snow stays in the ring. And now there are birds chirping. Snow’s entrance started 8 minutes ago.

The bell rings again and we still haven’t had any contact here. AND THEY STALL AGAIN. They haven’t even touched each other yet, nor have they been in the ring alone more than 5 seconds in a row. Now the fans want pizza. Even free pizza couldn’t make this interesting. Hey they’re in the ring at the same time. HE LOCKED UP WITH HIM! There’s a Guido’s Polish chant.

Snow grabs the head again and I want a grilled cheese. I’d rather listen to the music video called Grilled Cheese from the new Looney Tunes Show than keep watching this “match.” Don’t ask why I know it’s on or anything. Just forget I said that actually. Smothers is on the floor again as we’re well over fifteen minutes into this segment now counting intros. Joey is making fun of the Godfather to kill time. Not the wrestler. The movie. We’ve sunk that low.

Snow stops to touch the mannequin again as the ring is filled with smoke for some reason. Did Van Dam get lost under the ring or something? Guido pulls the top rope down and we go to the floor to waste some time. The fans want to know where the fire is. We actually GET SOME WRESTLING and as average as it is, this is a breath of freaking air. Tommy Rich comes in with an Italian flag shot to change the momentum again.

Out to the floor and the FBI double teams Snow. You know if I told you Al Snow vs. Tracy Smothers was going to get twenty minutes in a segment with no signs of stopping, I might be tempted to say that show is going to suck. Double team in the ring now but it’s ECW so that’s all cool. Oh sweet merciful toothpaste it’s a chinlock. The Italian hits a…no screw that. I’m not wasting one of my signature lines on a twenty three minute (so far) Tracy Smothers match.

Sitout powerbomb gets two for Snow. Guido interferes AGAIN and a leg lariat gets two for Smothers. Snow starts his comeback and hits a moonsault for two. He sends Smothers to the outside and this a top rope moonsault onto all three Italians. Chair to the head slows him down a bit. Oh good night now the referee is bumped. EVERYTHING IS NO DISQUALIFICATION! WHY DO YOU NEED TO BUMP THE REFEREE???

The crooked referee Jeff Jones comes out and is in a WWF referee shirt and hat. Everyone beats on Al as Jones is like this is cool with me. Naturally four grown men and a flag stick beating on you for a minute is nothing though as Snow grabs the head and blasts everyone with it. Tommy Rich is bleeding. Snow Plow for all the heels and a top rope head shot to Tracy’s balls ends this.

Rating: I. As in if you don’t know what I thought of this match, go play in traffic. Like immediately. Let me put this in perspective. This match/segment got 32 minutes in total. The original Hell in a Cell match, as in probably the best match the Undertaker has ever had and one of the most violent matches ever, got thirty from bell to bell. Just let that sink in for a bit.

Doug Furnas vs. Chris Chetti

Furnas is “from the WWF”, complete with a manager dressed like Vince carrying a big WWF flag. That being said, he comes out to Sad But True which was one of the first rock songs I ever got into so I can’t say he’s not making me smile a bit. Actually I can say that, but it’s a figure of speech. You get the idea I’m sure. They go to the mat almost immediately and the fans applaud. Gee that’s nice of them.

Chetti gets some clotheslines but a rana is blocked by a powerbomb. Furnas starts in on the back and yells at the fans some. Into a Liontamer and Chetti takes a beating for awhile. Belly to belly superplex gets two. The fans chant boring so Chetti hits a DDT and a double jump moonsault for the pin. Even Joey sounds shocked.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here. Chetti wasn’t anything until he hooked up with Nova a few years later. This was just there to get Chetti on the card I guess. It kind of sucks that he wasn’t interesting in the slightest. Furnas had a good look but no one cared about it. The WWF invader thing didn’t help him either.

The Vince look-a-like says Furnas is property of the WWF and he’s not thrilled with that. Furnas raises Chetti’s hand and almost kills the manager (Mr. Wright).

Joey welcomes us to the show…an hour into it. He talks about a dream partner tag match on Sunday where the tag champions will both pick mystery partners and face each other. Chris Candido is picking Shane Douglas but Storm won’t say who he’s picking. Joey brings out the Triple Threat (ECW’s version of the Horsemen but with better looking women) to try to get some answers.

This incarnation is Douglas, Candido and Bigelow. They even have hand signals. Shane…just get over it dude. Sunny is hotter than it should be legal to be. This was during Shane’s RIDICULOUS title reign that I still say is what killed the promotion. Shane won the title and him dropping it to Taz was more or less set in stone. Then Shane got hurt and he kept the title an extra SIX MONTHS so he could drop it to Taz. The problem was that by the time he finally did it, Taz’s heat was gone and the title change meant nothing. Shane held the title for all of 1998 so him talking about Taz here wouldn’t be paid off for nearly a year.

Shane talks down to Taz about his TV Title as apparently the Triple Threat hasn’t been around long. Well at least this incarnation hasn’t. Shane wants to know who Storm’s partner is but Candido says it doesn’t matter. Sunny knows who the partner is but won’t tell anyone. Apparently there are a lot of secrets she has from Candido and they get in an argument. This of course was a fake fight and they would be reunited at the PPV when Sunny was the partner for about a minute. The REAL partner (I think) was AL Snow.

Lance Storm vs. Chris Candido

They’re tag champions and they HATE each other. For no apparent reason Candido does a full entrance here. All Storm to start and a baseball slide puts Chris in the fans. Big plancha takes Candido out further. DOWN GOES SIGN GUY!!! The fans of course like Sunny more than anyone else and can you blame them? Candido fires off some chops to get some WOOs going.

Storm misses Candido and almost hits his face on the buckle. Close enough I guess as he sells it anyway. Delayed vertical is countered but Candido gets a neckbreaker for no cover. He’d rather pose a bit instead. Off to a chinlock which doesn’t last long. Storm tries to make his comeback but gets caught in a release powerslam. Storm comes back with chops as there are fans dressed as Bigelow and Sabu.

Big spinwheel kick puts Chris down again as does a dropkick which gets two. Storm misses a jump though and gets crotched on the top. Belly to back superplex gets two for Candido. Northern lights suplex gets two. Powerbomb doesn’t work and Storm gets a kick to take over. Candido fires off a super rana but he delays in covering again so it’s only two. They go the top again and Storm fights back and hits the Blonde Bombshell (top rope powerbomb and Candido’s finisher) for the pin.

Rating: C. Eh not bad and WAY better than anything else tonight, but just kind of there. These two feuded forever and had much better matches but this was ok. I’d rather have just looked at Sunny for the ten minutes they had for the match though. Not much and the whole Candido/Sunny issues went nowhere.

TV Title: Brakkus vs. Taz

Brakkus is more or less an American version of Rob Terry and is also “a WWF guy”. Actually he was in WWF for awhile and did nothing at all. Taz takes him down almost immediately and hits the crossface punches. Brakkus hits a powerbomb and his manager Droz sets up a table. Another powerbomb hits but the powerslam through the table is countered into a suplex through it. Gorilla press is countered into a Tazplex and the Tazmission ends this quick. Taz would lose the title Sunday to Bigelow in the match where they broke the ring.

Justin Credible vs. Tommy Dreamer

First blood here. Dreamer in a gimmick match that makes things more violent? Who would have seen that coming? Justin has been talking about Tommy’s family apparently. Oh and they’re having a regular match Sunday. Of course they are. One great thing about these old ECW shows: Beaulah. She is freaking gorgeous on all levels. Dreamer brings a trashcan lid with him because that’s how he rolls.

Out to the floor almost immediately as the fans make fun of Nicole Bass. She’s Justin’s bodyguard if that clears anything up. Dreamer hits a slingshot into a chair into the post. So what was the point of the chair if the post was already back there? Cactus Clothesline over the railing by Dreamer puts them both into the crowd. Time to walk around the arena like in every big ECW brawl.

We’re already on our third chant that implies Bass is a male. Jason, Justin’s uh…..friend I guess, interferes and a reverse DDT puts Dreamer down. The chair gets wedged between the top two ropes and Dreamer goes head first into it. Justin suplexes him onto the chair which doesn’t really hurt the head. Then again no one accused Justin of being all that intelligent.

A second suplex is countered and here comes Dreamer. Neckbreaker out of the corner still doesn’t work on the head at all. Beaulah and Jason have a quick argument in the ring which results in the referee taking a road sign shot to the head. Death Valley Driver puts Justin down as the fans chant Louie. DDT onto the chair but still no blood.

Time for the barbed wire and Tommy wraps it around himself. Seriously, does no one in ECW think these things through? A splash off the top hits Justin and Dreamer is in agony. And here’s RVD with a top rope kick to put a trashcan into the head of Dreamer. Barbed wire into his head plus a trashcan to the barbed wire wrapped around Dreamer’s head busts him open. A tombstone kills Beaulah and the referee wakes up in time to see Dreamer’s blood to end this.

Rating: D+. Just a weak match here that for the most part had no psychology at all. The run in made no sense but I guess it’s something that you need to watch the TV show to get. Also, what’s the point in having a gimmick match a week before a regular match? Either way, nothing of note here and just your usual brawl in ECW.

Jason gets beaten up with barbed wire post match and Dreamer chokes him with it for a bit.

Here are the Dudleys who aren’t the tag champions at the moment. We do get the always funny Joel Gertner entrance. Apparently the Dudleys just got back from Japan and they’re now the United States Intercontinental TV Western States Heritage Tag Team Champions. Gertner does the entrances, saying that he delivers more package than UPS. Apparently Big Dick Dudley has damaged more hotels than the entire US Hockey Team.

D-Von is getting jiggy with it before your very eyes and is very muscular apparently and is the Super Cruiserweight Champion of the World. Ok then. Bubba is the chairman of the Dudleyville Olympic Committee. These things take forever but they’re always funny. Joel says this is the gold, now send in the silver and the bronze. Good line.

Dudley Boys vs. Balls Mahoney/Axl Rotten/Sandman

Rotten and Mahoney come out in like a minute. Sandman’s should take roughly four….except he’s coming through the entrance like a normal wrestler. I’m not sure what to make of that. Somehow the entrance still takes nearly five minutes. Bubba is still a country hick and he talks down to Sandman a bit. He wants to wrestle so he gets caned in the head.

The brawl begins of course and Big Dick (the third Dudley) can’t be hurt by kendo stick shots. Instead he hits a chokeslam to Sandman and pounds away a bit. This is one of those matches where it’s just a wild brawl with no real coherence or anything like that. The Dudleys are in control here other than D-Von who is having issues with Axl. Balls hammers on Bubba as well as Sandman crashes to the floor. Oh that was an “elbow drop”. Got it.

Bubba vs. Balls in the ring at the moment. Superkick puts the future Bully down but Bubba manages a superplex of all things. We’ve got a cheese grater to the head of Rotten and he’s busted now. D-Von is beating on him now. There’s no tagging or semblance of order if for some reason you’re confused and were expecting some.

Mahoney is thrown into the crowd for a bit. All three Dudleys put him on a table while his partners are in the ring and down. Bubba goes up on some stage to dive off…and here’s New Jack. He clocks Bubba with a chair and dives onto Balls instead. Spike Dudley and Kronus are in the ring now and it’s a 9 man triple threat tag team match now. Sure, why not?

Dudley Boys vs. Balls Mahoney/Axl Rotten/Sandman vs. Spike Dudley/John Kronus/New Jack

New Jack’s song plays throughout the match even though Spike and Sandman are the only guys in the ring. Spike gets a bunch of two counts off various small person offense. Sandman goes to the floor but Spike misses a baseball slide. Kronus is busted. Balls is busted. You can make your own jokes there. A standing version of the move that would become known as What’s Up hits New Jack.

The most famous combination of the Dudley Boys sets for the 3D on New Jack but Jack falls down. The big brawl is still going here but it’s far slower. Granted they’ve been fighting for over ten minutes, but why are the new guys so tired? Kronus and Sandman both work on Big Dick. Lucky. It’s table time but it’s not set up. Pretty much just random punches with an occasional weapon being used.

Mahoney gets a belly to back suplex on Spike and sets for a moonsault through the table. Spike pops up and gets something like a tornado DDT through the table to Balls. Axl hits a REALLY inverted reverse DDT to eliminate Spike’s team. Yes this is elimination now. Bubba calls for the 3D on Sandman but the partners interfere. Something resembling a Stun Gun onto a chair is enough for Sandman to pin Bubba and end this.

Rating: D+. I still don’t like these things but at the same time this wasn’t as bad as some of these got. The biggest issue of all is the time, as this ran nearly 20 minutes. Far too long but they kept it mostly entertaining. The extra three guys coming in helped as it energized things a bit. Not horrible but nothing we haven’t seen a few million times already.

Shane Douglas/Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Rob Van Dam/Sabu

Main event here and at least Francine is looking good. The entrances take a good while. And now we stall. Shane is starting for his team. Not sure on an opponent at the moment but Fonzie blows the whistle a lot. Ok so it’s Rob. He has his own whistle and gets into a whistling contest. Whistling while stalling? Larry would be proud (double rep to the first person to get this reference. It’s about Larry Zbyszko, but what makes this one special?)

Rob fires off strikes but Shane avoids all of them. Van Dam tries his split legged move but gets stomped on to give Shane a brief advantage. Rob takes over with a kick and it’s time to work on the arm. Now Shane works on the arm. Off to Sabu who throws on the one arm camel clutch. Both non Triple Threat guys hit slingshot legdrops which gets a total of two on Shane.

Back to the Clutch and let’s WHISTLE BABY! Or since it’s Fonzie let’s WHISTLE DADDY! Total domination of the champion so far. Rob suplexes him back into the ring after a quick trip to the apron which gets two. More Clutching and Rob adds a spin kick to the back. Rob struts and says WOO but his split legged moonsault eats knees. Hot tag to Bigelow and Van Dam is in trouble.

DDT gets two as Sabu has to save. Double underhook release powerbomb and a headbutt by Bigelow and it’s back to Douglas. You know because he did so well in the first five minutes right? His hair is untied now so he looks a bit more ticked off. Time for the chinlock but Rob escapes and brings in Sabu. Time for the weapons to come in as Shane is sent to the floor and popped with a chair to the back.

Back in the ring a butterfly suplex puts Sabu down and we get a pair of tags. Bigelow mauls Van Dam but Greetings From Asbury Park is broken up. Sabu kind of hits a dive to the floor to Shane as this is breaking down quickly. Van Dam manages a decent rana on Bigelow all things considered. Everyone is on the floor now and Bigelow rams Rob into the post. Shane crotches Sabu on it as well and the Triple Threat is in control.

Bigelow and Van Dam are in the crowd now with Bigelow dominating him. Rob fights out and hits something that the cameras mostly miss. Sabu and Van Dam hit what would be called Poetry in Motion but Sabu botches it and hits Shane in the balls instead of the chest. Top rope….something takes Bigelow down as the tagging has been completely forgotten by this point.

Shane ducks a kick to send Rob into the ropes. Bigelow throws Shane over the top into the other two guys to take them both down. Apparently there was a table in there but you couldn’t see it. They’re walking around now because they’ve used most of their spots now. Table is brought in by Bigelow but according to hardcore wrestling law #1, he goes through it. Van Daminator takes Shane down for two.

Everything slows down now as another table is brought in and they have to take their time to make sure their plan goes perfectly well. Sabu puts Shane on the table and he goes through it. I don’t mean Sabu did anything to put him through it. I mean the table couldn’t hold his weight. What do you think the fans think of that? Shane goes through another table head first (it was in the corner) but Bigelow saves again. Fonzie gets involved and Bigelow tosses him away. Greetings From Asbury Park out of nowhere to RVD ends this.

Rating: D+. The first half of this when it was a regular tag match was pretty decent but after that it just fell apart. These guys getting 23 minutes just wasn’t a good idea at all. If you cut off about 8 minutes of the brawling, this would be a pretty good match. Shane is so out of his element in brawls it’s unreal. I mean, he’s just a decent in ring wrestler. What place could he possibly have in a wrestling company?

Sabu and Van Dam tease brawling post match but that wouldn’t be for awhile if I remember correctly.

Overall Rating: D. Well this could have been a lot worse. It’s really not a horrible show but with a lot of the matches just being bizarre choices (I mean seriously, Snow vs. Smothers for HALF AN HOUR???) and some matches seemingly running out of ideas halfway through, it’s hard to get into this. Not horrible, but really just a big house show. Nothing wrong with that, but not very inspiring.

It can be any WWE DVD ever.  These are going to take a bit longer to get through so it won’t be airing for awhile.  It can be anything and first to three votes wins.

ECW on TNN
Date: January 28, 2000
Location: Lakefront Arena, New Orleans, Louisiana
Attendance: 3,000
Commentators: Joey Styles, Joel Gertner

We’re getting closer to Living Dangerously and the showdown between Mike Awesome and Rob Van Dam. You might not have heard about that match and we’ll get to the reason why at the end of this. Other than that the Impact Players are still feuding with Raven and Dreamer who still have problems of course. Other than that it’s hard to say where you’re going to get from ECW. Let’s get to it.

Francine marches into Raven’s locker room but he’s sitting on the floor. He doesn’t want to be in his match tonight because it’s not for him. Raven complains about losing everything when he does stuff for other people. Dreamer comes in and calls him Scotty but Raven won’t go.

Joel and Joey do their in ring intro. Joel goes into his poetry about Cyrus and various sexual acts but we cut to Cyrus in the control room. He says that there are five wrestlers who will walk if Gertner doesn’t step down as commentator.

We cut to the end of last week’s show with Awesome and RVD which was interrupted by Sabu and resulted in a beatdown of Van Dam and Spike Dudley who tried to save. We get the whole segment because there’s nothing new to air instead.

Opening sequence. We’re over ten minutes in so far and that’s all we’ve seen.

Living Dangerously ad.

Buy our action figures! Including Taz who has already debuted in WWF!

Little Guido comes out for a match but first let’s have more non wrestling with Judge Jeff Jones and Mike Awesome talking about Spike Dudley.

Little Guido vs. Tajiri

Before the bell we take ANOTHER commercial, putting us about twenty minutes into an hour long show before the first bell. They speed things up to start with Tajiri escaping a sleeper and firing a kick to the ribs. Tajiri loads up a powerbomb…..AND WE TAKE ANOTHER BREAK??? Are you kidding me? Either way we come back with Guido getting slammed down before he heads to the floor.

A big moonsault takes out both Guido and Big Sal and we head back inside. There’s the Tarantula to Guido and the Buzzsaw Kick for no cover. Little tries a Fujiwara Armbar but Tajiri makes it to the rope. The handspring elbow takes Guido down and the double feet to the face.

Guido immediately comes back with a top rope Fameasser for two. Apparently a starting tight end for the Saints is replacing Raven as Dreamer’s partner. There’s a random pairing for you. A baseball slide into a chair crushes Guido’s face and a dropkick puts Sal on the floor. Tajiri kicks Guido in the face and hits a brainbuster for the pin.

Rating: C. Decent stuff here but it was basically a squash by Tajiri. Luckily for me Tajiri is one of my favorite ECW guys so I was hardly bored by this. Guido barely got in anything here and Tajiri beat up both him and his lackey with ease. As usual, neither guy is going anywhere though.

RVD is ready for Mike Awesome but wants Sabu first. Rob looks more stoned than usual here. This goes on for like two and a half minutes.

Rhyno/Steve Corino vs. Tommy Dreamer/Josh Wilcox

We start with Corino and Wilcox in three point stances but Corino gets called for offsides. Off to Rhyno who charges into the corner and it’s off to Dreamer. Dreamer gets beaten down immediately and pounded on the floor for a bit. A spinebuster and spear in the corner from Rhyno get two and it’s back to Corino. Tommy punches him in the ribs so it’s right back to Rhyno for more power stuff. A top rope splash misses and Dreamer Gores Rhyno down. There’s the tag to Wilcox who immediately turns on Dreamer, allowing Rhyno to piledrive him for the pin.

Rating: D. So we have a handicap match with a football player making a one off appearance and turning on his partner so the comedy heel’s team can win. This is after we spent twenty minutes on recaps and a feud involving an announcer. Yet people wonder why this show fell apart.

Wilcox rips into his hometown fans because of reasons that I don’t care enough about to remember. Something about fans booing the team or something. Corino calls out Dusty Rhodes who sneaks up on them and pounds away.

ECW World Title: Mike Awesome vs. Little Spike Dudley

Spike jumps Awesome to start and is immediately slammed down to the floor. Spike fires back but gets whipped into the barricade to keep the champion in control. After a quick brawl in the crowd we head back inside for Awesome to charge into a boot to the face. The champion hits a release German suplex for two and a lifting powerbomb for the same. A table is set up on the floor but Spike manages to bulldog Awesome through it instead.

Spike hits a top rope chair shot to Awesome but the champion is down on the floor. The Acid Drop is countered so Spike hits Awesome in the head with a chair instead. The fourth chair shot to the head in a row gets two but Awesome gets his foot up in the corner to block a charge. A BIG Awesome Bomb puts Spike down but the Awesome Splash gets two. Another table is set up in the corner and a running Awesome Bomb through said table retains the title.

Rating: D+. There was some drama here with the near falls but man alive could you have Spike do ONE SINGLE WRESTLING MOVE? I know he can do them because I’ve seen them use them before, but instead it was nothing but chair shots here. That’s a major reason I don’t like ECW: they thought swinging a chair in a wrestling ring meant wrestling.

Awesome calls out RVD but before he can get to the ring, Sabu jumps him from behind. Mike dives on both guys but only hits Sabu. Van Dam hits a big flip dive to take them both out to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Terrible opening third aside, the main event stuff is really taking off at the moment. The match at Living Dangerously looks to be great….and then the next night RVD broke his leg and would be out for three and a half months. That was pretty much the final straw for ECW as they were counting on RVD vs. Awesome to bring in some cash but it never happened due to the injury.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

I like the title if nothing else.

Disc 1
A Happy Story
Idyllic Childhood
Huge Fan
Training School
Working the Road
WCW
Sting
Vader
ECW & Japan
Mankind
Dude Love
Hell in a Cell
Mr. Socko
The Rock
Author
Triple H
Commissioner
Going Away
Randy Orton
Making a Difference
Edge
Retirement
Stand Up Comic
A Complete One-Off
Disc 2
Jack Foley / Les Thornton vs. The British Bulldogs
Superstars September 1986
Alternate Commentary: Mick Foley & Joey Styles

Cactus Jack / Gary Young vs. Scott Steiner / Billy Travis
AWA All Star Wrestling October 1988

Cactus Jack Manson vs. Brickhouse Brown
Wild West Wrestling April 1989

Cactus Jack vs. Keith Hart
Power Hour March 1990
Submit or Surrender Match

Cactus Jack vs. Sting
Power Hour November 1991

Falls Count Anywhere Match
Cactus Jack vs. Van Hammer
Clash of the Champions XVIII 21st January, 1992

Barbed Wire Match
Cactus Jack vs. Sandman
Ft. Lauderdale, FL May 1995

Cactus Jack vs. Shane Douglas
CyberSlam February 1996
Alternate Commentary: Mick Foley & Joey Styles

Mankind vs. Rocky Maivia
IYH: Cold Day in Hell 11th May, 1997

Mankind vs. Hunter Hearst Helmsley
IYH: Canadian Stampede 6th July, 1997
 
Disc 3
Dude Love vs. Rocky Maivia
RAW 17th November, 1997

Hell in a Cell
Mankind vs. Undertaker King of the Ring 28th June, 1998
Alternate Commentary: Mick Foley & Joey Styles

WWE Tag Team Championship Match
Mankind / Kane vs. New Age Outlaws
RAW 13th July, 1998

WWE Championship Match
Mankind vs. The Rock
IYH: Rock Bottom 13th December, 1998

WWE Tag Team Championship
Mankind / The Rock vs. Triple H / Shane McMahon
SmackDown 2nd September, 1999

Mankind vs. Al Snow
SmackDown 16th December, 1999

Hell In A Cell – Retirement Match
Cactus Jack vs. Triple H
No Way Out 27th February, 2000
 
Blu-ray Exclusives
Promos:

Sting’s Birthday Cake
WCW World Championship Wrestling 5th October, 1991

No Ear Surgery
WCW Saturday Night 10th September, 1994

Barbie
RAW 5th April, 2004

Cutting Edge
SmackDown 1st August, 2008

Relevancy with CM Punk
RAW 24th September, 2012

Stories:
Frank Foley
Snowed In
DeNucci Training School
Arrested in Italy?
Cactus Jack – The Name
Africa
Birth of Bang Bang
Losing Teeth
On the Spot
Wanted T-Shirt
Smoking Flight?
Anti-Hardcore ECW
Farewell in ECW
Vicious Suplex
Kevin Sullivan – Mentor
Rock ‘n Sock Jacket
Disneyland
Loogie Heard ‘Round the World
Commentator
Mr. Socko vs. The Cobra
Comedy Show
Favourite Mick Foley Persona
Sheamus Meets Mick
Christmas Cheer
Wardrobe
Thrifty Mick

Other than the Taker Cell match I don’t see any repeats unless the other Cell match is available somewhere.

ECW on TNN
Date: January 21, 2000
Location: ECW Arena, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 1,850
Commentators: Joel Gertner, Joey Styles

It’s been so long since I did one of these that I had to look up the stories that were going on. Apparently there are no stories because the previous episode was taped before the PPV so nothing new was added after that. We’re less than two months away from Living Dangerously now which focused on something we haven’t gotten to yet. Let’s get to it.

Joel and Joey do their entrance with Joel mocking Cyrus. This brings out Cyrus to talk about how the office is mad about the fans for some reason but they’re far madder about Joel and Joey. Cyrus goes off on Joel for having heat with the boys and having a stupid name joke to start the show. The next time Gertner defies Cyrus, it won’t end well for Joel. Joey has to hold Joel back as we go to the opening theme.

That opening theme lasts WAY too long.

Here are the Impact Players to open things up as Joel and Joey are still in the ring. Justin says they told us they would win the titles and that’s what they did. The higher ups want them to defend the titles tonight but that’s not happening. This brings out Danny Doring and Roadkill apparently to protest. They demand a title shot tonight but Storm calls them a couple of midcard jobbers. If they can beat a midcard team, they can get the title shot. The team in question is Dreamer/Raven who immediately charge the ring and the match is on.

Raven/Tommy Dreamer vs. Danny Doring/Roadkill

The match is joined in progress after a break with Roadkill getting crotched when taking too long on the top rope. A superplex puts Roadie down and there’s the tag to Raven. Bird Boy cleans house with knee lifts and covers Doring’s face with the snot rag. The drop toehold onto the chair gets two on Roadkill and the Evenflow gets the same on Doring. Everything breaks down and Roadkill is sent out to the floor. Dreamer and Francine set up a table which Dreamer pescados Roadkill through moments later.

Elektra and Francine tease a catfight but Dawn Marie blasts Francine instead. Raven carries Francine to the back, making this a handicap match. Dreamer steps on Doring’s crotch and hits a Death Valley Driver for two. There are a lot of saves in this match so far. A Roadkill powerslam gets two on Dreamer but Tommy hits a Russian legsweep on Doring and a DDT on Roadie at the same time. This brings out Corino, Victory and Rhyno who lay out Dreamer, allowing Doring to hit a top rope elbow drop for the pin.

Rating: C. This was your usual overdone ECW match but at least it was entertaining at some points. This was a combination of wrestling and storyline with Raven walking out on his partner which is similar to Hogan leaving with Liz at Main Event II in 1989. Then again though it wasn’t quite the same level of quality but you get the idea. As usual, this was overbooked though.

The post match beatdown continues with Victory and Corino working over Dreamer. Dusty Rhodes finally comes out (I don’t think this is his debut) and it’s elbows all around. Rhyno comes in and beats Dusty down until Sandman comes through the entrance for the final save. Sandman pours beer into Dreamer’s mouth to revive him.

Super Crazy vs. Tajiri

This is a Mexican death match and we go to a break about 15 seconds in. Back with Tajiri throwing in two more chairs to go with one that was already in the ring. Apparently Crazy is busted open as Tajiri throws in a table. Tajiri tries to slide the chairs along the table to hit Crazy in the head but Crazy keeps ducking to avoid death. With Crazy on the table, Tajiri hits a double stomp onto Crazy but the table doesn’t break. A second attempt finally works and Tajiri follows it up with a HARD kick to the face.

Since this is ECW, Crazy is back up in roughly 8 seconds and hits a top rope Lionsault. We head to the floor and into the crowd for a chair shot to the Japanese head. A moonsault off the bleachers puts Tajiri through another table and we head back to the ring. Tajiri is busted open but comes back with the handspring elbow. Crazy of course no sells it and hits a clothesline to take over again.

Tajiri gets put on the top rope (as in on the rope itself, not in the corner) where Crazy hits a springboard spinwheel kick to knock him down for two. Tajiri pops back up and hits a German suplex for two before going back to the floor. Crazy is sent into the crowd for an Asai moonsault. Back in and Super throws in two tables again, because goodness knows he isn’t going to stay on the mat. Tajiri hits the Mist but FIVE SECONDS LATER Crazy is fine enough to catch a rana attempt out of the corner into a powerbomb through the table for the pin.

Rating: C. This was fun again but MAN ALIVE Crazy brought it down. He pops up from an Asai Moonsault, two top rope double stomps AND Mist to the face? That’s another ECW problem in a nutshell: the wrestling going on isn’t of a very high quality. The no selling was really distracting here and makes Tajiri’s solid offense look lame.

Call the Hotline and hear about the Radicalz leaving ECW. That actually happened.

Living Dangerously is coming!

Here’s Awesome to talk about how he’s going to crush Spike Dudley again. The fans chant for RVD but Awesome says that only his world title matters in ECW. Since he’s the world champion, he’s the Whole F’N Show. This brings out TV Champion RVD who praises Awesome but says that Mike is still just part of the show, but Van Dam IS the show.

Awesome issues a challenge and we get a bell! We also get a blackout and here’s Sabu. Since he’s supposed to help Van Dam, he turns on RVD and it’s a double beatdown. RVD’s manager Fonzie gets put through a table. Spike Dudley tries to come in and gets laid out as well. A top rope splash/legdrop combination puts RVD through a table to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. This was one of the better shows they’ve had yet. We had major stories advanced and a BIG match set up at the end. That’s how a TV show after a PPV should work but ECW doesn’t often get that right. The wrestling wasn’t much at all but that goes without saying most of the time in ECW. Good stuff here though.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Guilty As Charged 1999
Date: January 10, 1999
Location: Millennium Theater, Kissimmee, Florida
Attendance: 2,600
Commentator: Joey Styles

So tonight after about eight months of waiting too long, it’s FINALLY time for Shane vs. Taz. The main problem here is simple: until this point, no one bought for a second that anyone but Taz was going to take the belt off of Shane, so there was no point in caring about any other challenger.

The other issue was Taz wasn’t nearly as hot anymore. RVD was arguably the hottest guy on the roster but after the WAY long build for Taz, he had to have the belt at least 3-4 months. Other than that there’s not a lot here. Dreamer vs. Credible in a Stairway to Hell ladder match and that’s about it. Let’s get to 1999 in ECW.

Heyman thanks us for buying the event. He says the card has to be changed and Tanaka and Lynn won’t be working tonight, so instead of Tanaka vs. RVD and Lynn vs. Storm and Spike we get Storm vs. Van Dam. I like them just flat out telling us. It’s a nice little touch as the reality is simple: bad stuff happens sometimes and you have to deal with it at times. Good for Paul to just flat out say it.

Joey says ECW is Guilty as Charged. Doesn’t say what they’re guilty of but whatever.

Cue theme song.

Danny Doring/Roadkill vs. Full Blooded Italians

Doring and Roadkill don’t even get an entrance on PPV. That’s saying a lot about them I’d say. It’s Smothers and Guido in case you were wondering. Not a terrible choice for an opener I guess. Joey goes silent for a long time for no apparent reason. The arena setup is really weird as the ramp is coming from the bottom as opposed to the side. And here are Rotten and Mahoney.

Apparently this is now a three way dance. Ah there’s Joey. I wonder if Rotten ever got annoyed with the music always being about Mahoney. Rotten says he hates this dancing stuff so now it’s a three way dance, meaning elimination rules. Well sure why not. Yep it’s chair shot time. There’s no one in the ring at all. Ah ok we have Mahoney and Smothers in there. The commentary is really quiet as it’s hard to hear Joey.

Of course there’s nothing resembling tagging or wrestling at all here so it’s ECW. Ok that’s not fair or true but you get the point. Apparently Roadkill screws sheep. The ring is REALLY loud. He puts Smothers down and in a move that literally has my mouth hanging open, Roadkill hits a top rope splash ¾ across the ring. That was IMPRESSIVE.

And the Italians put out Roadkill and Doring with a double fisherman’s suplex. Rotten has been nowhere to be seen for a LONG time now. Oh there he is on the apron. Both freaky looking guys hit their finishers on the Italians to end it. They add a pair of SICK chair shots for the heck of it.

Rating: D+. Just way too short to mean anything here. It was beat up one guy, go for a finisher, counter finisher, hit finisher, pin. The adding in of the Freaks helped too I think as it’s not like this was anything remotely resembling interesting otherwise so there’s nothing wrong with that. Still though just something to get the crowd going and it worked pretty well in that sense. Match was awful though.

Terry Funk is here to complain about Tommy Dreamer. Apparently this is about Jake Roberts for some reason. Yes I know the story behind it.

Yoshihiro Tajiri vs. Super Crazy

Tajiri is in regular tights here and he looks weird like that. He looks YOUNG too. This should be fun if nothing else. Joey sums up Tajiri by saying he loves to kick. Yep that’s accurate. DANG they are freaking moving out there. That was awesome looking right there. Not huge on Tajiri completely no selling that spinning DDT but whatever. There’s that handspring elbow. I love that move.

Picture perfect Asai moonsault follows that up. SICK kick to Crazy’s head and a Tarantula follow that up. Awesome stuff. I always cringe whenever someone is put in a surfboard. That move is just freaking painful looking. This is awesome to say the least. They trade rollups but both guys just get two. It’s followed up by some insane strikes and counters that I can’t keep up with. Tajiri ends it with a Dragon Suplex (full nelson into a suplex pin).

Rating: A-. OH YES. Ok, now if this was what ECW meant by the best of the rest of the world, I get it. This was AMAZINGLY fun to watch. It’s about 11 minutes long which is perfect as both guys were starting to get a bit tired at the end so instead of sucking the life out of the place at the end they wrapped it up. This was awesome and fun. It was a spotfest and there isn’t a thing wrong with that. Incredibly entertaining match.

Come see us!

John Kronus vs. ???

Kronus has completely outlived his usefulness at this point and no one cares. Judge Jeff Jones debuts as the Judge instead of being the crooked referee that he had been for months prior to this. Considering Bill Clinton had a heart issue last night, his jokes about him are a bit touchy. He declares a bunch of people Guilty as Charged.

Apparently Kronus beat Jones up at a live show. He brings out Sid Vicious to beat the tar out of Kronus. Sid throws him through a table which more or less explodes. There’s a massive POWERBOMB chant. For the life of me I never got why Sid was so over but he always was to be fair. This might have lasted two minutes at most.

Rating: N/A. Well he’s a bigger deal than Jake Roberts if nothing else. Never been that big on him but he got a pop and a freaking half so there we go.

We recap Shane vs. Taz, including Taz vs. Sabu. Oh and Shane offered him Francine. She was hotter than given credit for. Sabu got his neck broken…again, by Taz. I guess this made more sense in context. Oh ok it was a plot by Taz to get into the ECW Title picture and drop the FTW belt. Got it.

Gertner and the Dudleys show up unannounced for no apparent reason. Clean shaven Bubba is odd looking. They’re only five time champions here. That’s odd indeed. Big Dick just growls at the camera. Nicely done. Gertner makes these shows, period. He’s the bacon in her eggs, the man for whom she begs and the face between her legs. He’s talking about Daisy Duck of all….well actually non people in this case.

I have a new favorite line from Gertner. When talking about Sign Guy: he’s pretty fly for a sign guy. Apparently Big Dick split open YOUR 42 year old mother and then gave it to her like a pair of 21 year old twins. Yep, I love Gertner. They call out anyone and they get a pretty bad answer.

Dudley Boys vs. New Jack/Spike Dudley

Oh great. IT’S THAT STUPID SONG!!! Spike is dressed like a gangsta. I hate my life. Two guesses as to what the primary focus of this match is. Go ahead and guess. BOY TAKE A FREAKING GUESS! Spike almost gets his head taken off by a shot with something made of metal. D-Von just unloads on New Jack. Spike is launched into the crowd and they body surf him back to the ring. You know ECW: always doing new stuff. And let’s just do it again!

The faces both have guitars and the heels both have chairs. Big Dick winds up taking both guitars. And New jack is freaking cheered for this stuff. They botch a 3D on the ramp so it looks like Jack splashes Bubba. He never even touches the ramp. Ok wait so a guitar being broken over the head of Dick does nothing but an Acid Drop puts him down. A good 3D ends Spike and thankfully that song too.

Post match the Dudleys just freaking kill New Jack with chair shots. They then talk about how they’ve destroyed every team in ECW history. He calls out Public Enemy for a match in six days. They actually did show up despite working for WCW at the time.

Rating: F-. I hate these things and I always have. Call it bias or whatever but guys like New Jack are a disgrace to the sport of pro wrestling and anything he’s involved in is a failure on the part of the booker for putting him on the card. He has no business in wrestling and should be in jail for attempted murder with the Grimes incident.

Big long RVD video package set to Walk. Nothing wrong with that. So instead of Tanaka it’s Storm vs. Van Dam. That could work quite well.

TV Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Lance Storm

Dawn Marie isn’t human. She can’t be. Storm gets in a great line: he’s not the whole F’ing show but he’s the best part of it. Now Paul make sure you pay attention to the reaction that Van Dam gets, because you won’t be hearing anything like it in the main event. We get a LONG feeling out process that actually isn’t boring at all. I’ve always liked the way Storm threw punches for some reason. Storm gets the half crab which doesn’t mean anything yet.

Fonzie and Dawn (Tammy Lynn Bytch at the time but not a lot of people would get that name) go at it on the floor which lets Van Dam take over. SWEET superkick by Storm. Has to be the second best guy at that ever. We’re in the crowd now and in probably one of the five sickest bumps I’ve ever seen, Van Dam gets a reverse DDT onto the floor. No protection at all and he just slams into it.

Storm is WAY underrated in the ring. This has been solid stuff so far, but I’d like more in ring stuff. Storm is a Canadian bad boy apparently. Van Dam more or less cuts a promo in the middle of the match. That’s just awesome. Ah there we go. We’re back in the ring. I don’t mind the insane stuff as long as it winds up being about wrestling. Van Dam goes for the Van Daminator (why can’t he go for coffee or lunch instead?) but Storm jumps away. WHAT A BRILLIANT IDEA!!!

It connects the second time and Storm is out cold. Oh ok he was faking. The referee takes a SWEET looking Van Daminator. After Fonzie interferes, a Van Daminator from the top gets two. The quick taunts from Van Dam are what set him apart I think. Like I’ve said before, the playing to the crowd is a signature of the all time greats like Austin, Rock, Sting, Hogan and Flair. In a very surprising finish, we get a wrestling sequence and Van Dam gets the CLEAN pin with a nice German suplex. I greatly approve.

Rating: B. Good stuff here but the overbooking and interference hurt it a bit. This was one of those matches where both guys could definitely bring it and they did here. The ending worked very well too as Van Dam beat him with his own game. What more can you ask for? Solid stuff.

We recap Dreamer vs. Credible which is because of Funk apparently taking Credible under his wing. So yeah, it’s about Funk vs. Dreamer again, which never had the blowoff because Funk headed to WCW.

Justin Credible vs. Tommy Dreamer

You know if you cut Nicole Bass’ head off she’d look good. Jazz, who doesn’t have a name yet, is also with Credible. This is a Stairway to Hell match, meaning there is barbed wire hanging over the ring and you need a ladder to get to it. I love Man in the Box. I just do. What in the world is the appeal of Justin? I have never gotten that at all. We get a weird shot from across where the cameras would be to see the ladder. I don’t think I’ve ever seen that before.

Tommy finally brings the ladder into play as this has been all brawling anyway. The fans want Funk apparently. For a good while it’s all Dreamer and that’s over already. Do you think four people with Justin is enough? Dreamer has a bad arm now too. All of Justin’s entourage helps him out and down goes Tommy. I JUST SAID THAT JOEY!!! I didn’t think it was possible but Jazz is somehow more annoying than she would be in WWE.

It’s all Justin at this point as he just beats the living tar out of Tommy with all kinds of stuff. Tommy makes his comeback and of course here’s Funk because according to Heyman, Credible isn’t allowed to lose. That’s Incredible, which in this case is a powerslam, onto a ladder ends it. I know this is supposed to be an epic storyline and whatnot but I just couldn’t care less at all.

Rating: D. This whole thing was so that Funk could screw over Tommy. I didn’t need a 20 minute beating and Jazz/Nicole screaming to get to that point. Just a waste of time that I wanted to end after about five minutes or so.

Some guy named Stephen Prazak (has to be related to Dave in ROH somehow) interviews Taz. This reaches Rock and Coach levels of insulting. How did Taz go from this to the raving idiot he is now.

Shane says he’s not ready to lose the belt. That’s so funny because it’s supposed to be in character.

ECW World Title: Shane Douglas vs. Taz

Oh and to be clear: Shane has a broken wrist so Taz won’t win deservingly no matter what he does. Ok, before we get into this, let’s get this out of the way. In my eyes, it was this feud that officially killed ECW. Shane should have dropped the belt at least six months ago to Taz who would then be able to drop it to RVD who was the hottest thing in the company and also the best wrestler in the company.

For those of you that don’t know, Taz wins the belt here and holds it until September when he goes to WWF. The problem was that by this time, no one cared about Taz at all. RVD was the popular guy but instead of putting the belt on him like the money would have been in, as that by this time, no one cared about Taz at all.

RVD was the popular guy but instead of putting the belt on him like the money would have been in, he belt more or less had to go to Taz since he had chased it for a year now. Shane should have dropped it in like August and this should be Van Dam vs. Taz for it, but instead by the time Taz dropped it, ECW was dead in the water anyway.

Overall Rat….oh that’s right we still have a match to go. They’re trying to make this seem epic but both guys are more or less done as far as meaning anything in the ring at this point. Taz is ok but the people are just rather apathetic to him at this point. We get a conversation with either production or security guys which is always interesting.

They’re out in the crowd now, meaning more time that the inevitable can’t happen. No one on the planet thinks Shane has a chance here but I guess it has to be made out to be epic right? We’re still in the crowd, which is a very annoying one this time. OH GOOD NIGHT JUST GO TO THE FREAKING RING!!! This is so freaking stupid. We can barely see them as they’re just brawling.

This has been going on for nearly 10 minutes. Shane is bleeding and we’re BACK IN THE RING! Oh look, it’s a table. Taz goes through it as I think watching a test pattern might be more interesting. Shane goes through a table. This is just dull. And now we have no lights. Sabu appears, complete with pyro (in ECW?). He beats up both guys for not apparent reason other than Taz breaking his neck and Shane putting Taz up to it. At least it makes sense.

Pretty impressive that a guy with a broken neck can beat up two professional wrestlers. Shane calls for the Triple Threat and here’s Tammy (Sunny). You know what that means. Candido is here and he turns on Shane, I guess going face? That sets up the Tazmission which of course Shane is allowed to escape for a second before it’s locked on again and Shane passes out. Was that supposed to be Austin/Hart again or something?

Rating: D+. And that’s being VERY generous. This match was 22 minutes long. Of that, 12 were brawling in the crowd, three were Sabu doing his thing, two were Candido running in and 5 were actual wrestling. That’s the EPIC match though right? This could have been good, but seriously, there was enough time spent just “brawling” in the crowd to have the main event of Mania 9. Steamboat beat Savage in about as much time as they brawled in the crowd. See what I mean?

Overall Rating: C-. This show tried. I can’t take that away from it at all. This show had some thought and effort put into it and that helps a lot. However, some of the stuff here was just flat out bad. There is some very good stuff in here, but there’s too much brawling to make it great. A problem with ECW is that they tried to substitute brawling and violence for storytelling and wrestling and that can’t work long term.

Two of the last three matches were brawling and a moment at the end with nothing else going on. This is indeed better than most of the shows that ECW has had lately, but still the last hour of this show just bored me to tears. Check it out, but have a remote in hand to fast forward it.

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