IMG Credit: WWE

Summerslam 2005
Date: August 21, 2005
Location: MCI Center, Washington DC.
Attendance: 18,156
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Tazz, Michael Cole, Jonathan Coachman

It’s a big show here with a card that doesn’t quite live up to the hype. We have a huge main event between Hulk Hogan and Shawn Michaels, but after that it’s kind of a downgrade with Rey Mysterio vs. Eddie Guerrero with a kid (symbolically) above the ring. The World Title matches see John Cena defending against Chris Jericho and JBL challenging Batista in a No Holds Barred match. Maybe they can make it work though so let’s get to it.

Lilian Garcia sings the Star Spangled Banner.

The opening video looks at the big matches, which works a bit better. Granted that might be because it’s set to Remedy by Seether and I always liked that song. Shawn vs. Hogan gets its own section of the video, because nothing on this show comes close to it (fair enough).

US Title: Chris Benoit vs. Orlando Jordan

Jordan is defending and it’s a German suplex into the Crossface to make Benoit champion in 25 seconds. Now THAT is how you wake a crowd up while giving Jordan exactly what he deserved in Honky Tonk Man style.

Vickie Guerrero comes in to see Eddie and asks him to calm down. This isn’t about Dominic because it’s all about Eddie not being able to beat Rey. Eddie wants someone to carry on the Guerrero legacy and Vickie talks about him having a heart of gold. But there’s also an evil inside of him that won’t leave Rey alone. Eddie: “So now you don’t think I can beat Rey?” Eddie throws her out and reassures himself that he’ll win.

We recap Matt Hardy vs. Edge. Lita left Matt for Edge while Matt was hurt and then he was released. Matt invaded Raw a few times to get at Edge but then he was rehired and it was just Matt Hardy again. Tonight is the big fight.

Matt Hardy vs. Edge

Hardy runs to the ring and starts the fight on the floor as it feels like Matt wants to kill him. They get inside with Matt hammering away and a loud HARDY chant. Matt grabs a rear naked choke but Edge gets to the ropes and then back outside. Back in and Edge hits a headbutt to put Matt on the ropes as the fans are all over Lita.

A spear through the ropes puts them back on the floor but Matt hammers away with right hands to the head. More right hands in the corner have Edge in trouble so he drops Matt face first onto the post to knock him silly. Even Lita looks concerned as Matt is busted open. Matt can barely stand so Edge kicks him in the head….and the referee stops it.

Rating: D+. So yeah Matt comes back, gets in a few shots, and then gets busted open for a referee stoppage in five minutes. The first minute or so felt like a war but then it was little more than a hard hitting match with one big spot. This is the kind of thing that needed to go about eighteen minutes with both of them bleeding, but that would suggest that Matt was something important, rather than just a way to get Edge over. I can go with that as Matt is Matt and Edge has been a near main eventer for a long time now, but this was a major disappointment after the setup.

We recap Eddie Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio. Eddie can’t beat Rey and has been driven completely crazy over jealousy and his failures. Therefore, Eddie is going to try something else so he brought up that Rey’s son Dominic was really Eddie’s biological son. Eddie wanted Dominic, but a social worker said they had to settle this, so a ladder match was made instead.

Rey Mysterio vs. Eddie Guerrero

Tony Chimel: “The following contest is a ladder match for the custody of Dominic!” And that’s your most ridiculous ring introduction of all time. Dominic and the social worker are in the front row so Eddie goes over to them for a rather evil smile. Rey comes out and hugs Dominic so Eddie goes over and shakes the social worker’s hand. We’re ready to go and Eddie talks a lot of trash as they stare each other down to start.

Eddie gets in a cheap shot to knock Rey into the corner but Rey monkey flips him out to the floor. A whip sends Rey into the ladder though and he has to springboard in with a dropkick to knock Eddie off. Eddie goes to get another ladder so Rey dropkicks that one into his face, followed by a springboard seated senton to the floor. Back in and Eddie saves Rey’s climb with a sunset bomb but he can’t hold on, making it look rather messy. Eh to be fair that’s a pretty tricky spot.

Eddie hits him in the ribs and face with the ladder before sandwiching Rey between some ladders. The fans know what’s coming and are rather pleased with the slingshot hilo onto a ladder onto Rey onto another ladder. Rey gets up and uses a ladder to bridge his way up top to cut Eddie off, including a backdrop onto the bridged ladder. The crash bangs up Rey’s knee so he climbs rather slowly, allowing Eddie to dropkick the ladder out and hurt the knee even more.

Eddie reverse powerbombs him ribs first into the ladder on the top rope and there’s that evil smile again. That’s enough for another climb but Dominic comes in to shake the ladder. That just annoys Eddie so he yells at Dominic and demands a hug. Eddie: “I’m your new daddy now!” Eddie goes to hit him but Rey makes the save as Dominic is back with the social worker who let him jump the barricade and interfere in a violent match.

Rey sends him into a ladder and then 619s said ladder into Eddie’s face, only to hurt the knee again. The knee is ok enough to Drop The Dime onto a ladder onto Eddie and then load up the ladder again. Eddie climbs up the same side for an electric chair but Rey shows him how to do the sunset bomb for the huge crash. Rey goes up again and grabs the case but Eddie kicks the ladder out and pulls Rey down into a big spinebuster.

With Rey pinned under the ladder, Eddie goes up but stops to talk a lot of trash. He can’t unhook the thing anyway, allowing Rey to wiggle free and kick the ladder over. Apparently Vickie was supposed to run in there and missed the cue, explaining why Eddie couldn’t understand how a hook worked. Eddie is back up with Three Amigos, including the third onto the ladder. That means another climb but this time Vickie comes out for the save as she shoves the ladder over. Vickie pulls Eddie back so Rey can climb p and win.

Rating: B. It’s rather good with some big crashes, but the Vickie/Dominic stuff was too much and brought the match down. Rey vs. Eddie is something you can watch all day, especially if Eddie is all evil, but they could have come up with something better than a ladder match for custody papers. It was too far and became dumb rather than dramatic, which defeats a lot of the purpose.

Post match Vickie is relieved and Rey hits Eddie with a briefcase for a bonus.

Chris Jericho doesn’t like John Cena’s theme music and promises to make him as forgettable as the New Kids On The Block. He beat the Rock and Steve Austin on the same night and Cena isn’t on their level.

Eugene vs. Kurt Angle

For Eugene’s (Or Angle’s?) Gold Medal with no time limit and Christy Hemme is here with Eugene. Angle goes off on him to start and stomps Eugene down into the corner. Eugene comes back with a Faarooq spinebuster but Angle breaks up the People’s Elbow attempt with a hard clothesline. The fans are very pleased with this as they don’t seem all that into Eugene here.

Angle rolls the German suplexes for two and the fans are happy again. Eugene gets sent into the buckle a few times so the comeback is on, including a Rock Bottom for two. The Stunner gets the same and Eugene takes down the non-existent straps. Angle reverses the ankle lock by rolling him into the corner though and it’s the Angle Slam into the ankle lock for the win.

Rating: D. This could have been on Raw as Eugene was completely overwhelmed. The charm is long past gone now and it’s just Eugene doing Austin and Rock moves with almost nothing in between. It was just a squash anyway as Eugene is treated like the glorified jobber that he is. Angle needs to move on to something else and Eugene needs to become something else entirely.

Post match Angle stands on a chair so he can be awarded the medal again.

The Divas, in swimsuits, wash a limo with the Presidential seal on the door. The window goes down to reveal Vince McMahon. Vince: “Hey, why not?” There’s a McMahon For President bumper sticker on the limo for a bonus.

Undertaker vs. Randy Orton

Rematch from Wrestlemania because Orton isn’t happy with his loss. It’s weird to see Undertaker come out first. Orton bails to the floor to start so Undertaker takes a second before shoving him down. A slap gets in Orton’s head a bit but he’s back up to dodge some right hands. Undertaker grabs a headlock (that’s a rare one) but Orton is right back with a hiptoss into a clothesline. That just earns him a big boot to the face and Orton is stunned in a hurry.

Undertaker goes technical with a keylock into Old School but Orton somehow understands what it means when Undertaker stands on the top while holding an arm. Old School is broken up with an armdrag back down but Undertaker LAUNCHES him into the corner to hammer away. The big boot and jumping clothesline give Undertaker two but the big boot in the corner only hits….well corner really and Orton grabs a DDT for his own two with Undertaker putting a foot across the rope.

Flashing back to his Evolution days, Orton cannonballs down onto the leg and then wraps it around the post. The leglock goes on so Undertaker punches his way to freedom, only to earn a knee drop to the ribs. Undertaker limps into the powerslam for two and it’s time to go to Texas with a spinning toehold.

That’s broken up as well and Undertaker starts kicking at Orton’s knee, earning a one off BORING chant. That doesn’t last long either as Orton is right back to the knee as the slow pace continues. Undertaker kicks him out to the floor for a ram into the steps and the apron legdrop as this isn’t exactly hitting a high gear. Old School connects back inside and it’s the Downward Spiral to Orton, who is right back with a dropkick for the double knockdown.

The RKO is blocked so they fight over a Tombstone until Orton gets two off the backbreaker. Orton goes up but Undertaker rolls through the high crossbody and grabs him by the throat. The chokeslam connects but a “fan” comes in. The distraction lets Orton hit the RKO for the fast pin.

Rating: C+. It was a struggle to get this high as there was no sense of urgency or any time until the end where either of them seemed close to going to a finish. At least the Wrestlemania match had an awesome near fall of the RKO but this was a bunch of leg work until they got to the finish. It could have worked if they had gone to a better ending but this never got into a higher gear.

And it’s Cowboy Bob Orton. You can book the rubber match already.

Some members of the Republican National Committee are here.

We recap Chris Jericho vs. John Cena. They’ve been having issues since Cena made his Raw debut on the Highlight Reel. Then they got in an argument over who was the bigger rock star, which turned into Cena’s Steve Austin vs. Eric Bischoff’s Vince McMahon with Jericho and Carlito as the chief lackeys. The former story was better but why do that when you can do the same thing you’ve done so many times before?

Bischoff wishes Jericho’s luck.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Chris Jericho

Cena is defending. They go nose to nose to start and a lockup doesn’t go anywhere. Jericho’s headlock is just as ineffective but he grabs a suplex to take over. There’s the spinwheel kick to drop Cena again but the springboard crossbody only lands on the floor. Back in and Cena hammers away, only to charge into a dropkick in the corner. A suplex gives Jericho two and a basement dropkick to the headsets up the chinlock.

They go outside with Jericho choking away with a cord but Cena is back with right hands. This isn’t exactly blowing the roof off the place so far. The big flying shoulder misses though and Jericho hits the running bulldog. Jericho has to bail out of the Lionsault so he tries the Walls, which is kicked out to the floor in a hurry. Cena drops the middle rope Fameasser over the ropes for two on the way back in but the FU is countered into a DDT for two. It’s time to start in on the back with a backbreaker and some elbows as the fans are loudly split.

The running crotch attack to the back only hits ropes though and they’re both down again. Cena is back up with that hard clothesline into the ProtoBomb. The Shuffle is countered into the Walls in the middle though, sending Cena on the long crawl to the ropes. Jericho pulls him back in but Cena makes the rope on the second attempt to a rather loud reaction. Cena’s back is good enough to try a super AA but Jericho slips out and grabs another suplex for another two. An argument with the referee lets Cena grab the FU to retain.

Rating: B. This took some time to get going but they drew the crowd into it and it turned into a heck of a match by the end. Cena is showing some signs of brilliance in these big matches and Jericho has more than shown that he can hang with anyone so this was a benefit to both of them. Good match here as Cena is becoming a bigger and bigger star every single week.

We recap JBL vs. Batista (hometown boy) for the Smackdown World Title. JBL beat him by DQ last month so now it’s No Holds Barred. Not much more to it than that as JBL isn’t quite the believable challenger.

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

Batista is defending and it’s No Holds Barred. We get the JBL dollars raining from the ceiling during JBL’s entrance. The fight starts at the entrance with Batista ramming him into various things. A fire extinguisher into the face drops Batista though and JBL punches him around the barricade, only to have Batista spear him through said barricade.

They get inside for the first time with JBL kicking him in the head, followed by some whipping with a belt. Back up and Batista charges into a boot in the corner, setting up the Clothesline From JBL for two. JBL slides in the steps and this isn’t going to end well. The powerbomb off the steps is countered into a backdrop off of them and Batista hits the spinebuster. There’s the Batista Bomb but Batista doesn’t cover. Another Batista Bomb onto the steps retains the title.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t much but it was way better than their previous match as it didn’t go on forever, though the stipulation wasn’t exactly used. They went with the definitive ending here as Batista completely beat him, which is all it should have been. JBL was never a threat to Batista and now they can both move on to something else, with both of them going in the proper direction.

We recap Shawn Michaels vs. Hulk Hogan. They teamed a handful of times and then Shawn superkicked him on the Fourth of July. Shawn said he had to know and the match was made. Everything went spiraling out of control after that though, with Shawn turning it into a weird near shoot on Hogan’s career while Hogan just referenced Bret Hart and screwjobs a few times. Shawn has carried this feud on his back and it’s going to be interesting to see how they get to the big boot and legdrop.

Hulk Hogan vs. Shawn Michaels

Hogan has the big flag out for the entrance. It’s a long staredown to start before Hogan shoves him away and shows off the biceps. Hogan shoves him down a few more times and Shawn is already frustrated. A headlock works a bit better for Shawn until a shoulder sends him into a backflip through the ropes as the overselling is already strong. Back in and Shawn knees him in the ribs but gets put on top so Hogan can kick him in the ribs.

Shawn bounces as high into the air as he can for a crotching, before a ram into the buckle gives us a bump that Mr. Perfect would think is too much. A clothesline puts Shawn on the floor where he rolls backwards again, gets up and falls back down. Shawn manages a kick to the face though and starts chopping away in the corner. The slap to the face does not go well so Shawn does it again before chopping even more. A third slap earns Shawn a right hand out to the floor but they both get posted with Hogan staggering around a lot.

Shawn posts him again but still can’t put Hogan down so it’s time for some left hands to the head. Some right hands in the corner get Shawn shoved down again (make it twice), only to have him finally punch Hogan down (you don’t see that too often). Hogan is finally busted open and Shawn grabs the sleeper to follow the Randy Savage formula from Wrestlemania V. Shawn’s arm is covered in blood as Hogan suplexes his way to freedom.

The forearm into the nipup lets Shawn drop the elbow (OH YEAH indeed) but this one misses (leave it to Savage kid). Hogan slugs away but Shawn tries another forearm, which takes out the referee. The fans want Bret (fair enough after the promos building this up) but Shawn is up first and heads to the top, only to come back down for a terrible Sharpshooter (even Rock’s is better than that).

Another referee comes in and Hogan very slowly makes it to the rope. Hogan kicks him into the second referee and everyone is down again. A low blow drops Hogan and a chair to the head finally lets Shawn hit the elbow. Sweet Chin Music connects for two but Hogan kicks out, Hulks Up, punches away and finishes with the big boot and legdrop. So that’s how they got there.

Rating: B-. The match was a weird one (YOU THINK?) as Shawn was doing his over the top selling and turning it into a joke at first but then it settled into a match with a pretty simple formula that hit the high points but didn’t exactly break the mold. Hogan was the definitive winner here and Shawn hit everything he could without being able to finish Hogan off. I liked it well enough and it’s certainly a dream match, but it’s two matches in one and that’s a little distracting.

Post match Hogan poses but Shawn stops him to make everything nice. Shawn says he had to know and, as usual, wrestlers are rather forgiving about the whole situation. It’s more posing to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This show was all over the place with some good wrestling and action but a lot of things that felt like they should have been so much more. It’s an enjoyable show and something I’d watch again down the line, but it felt like they were going for a stacked show and as it is, it’s just pretty good. Fix some of the bigger holes and it’s a great one, but I’ll take what I can get after a build that wasn’t their best work.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also -available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author- page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: August 18, 2005
Location: Air Canada Centre, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 7,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s the go home show for Summerslam and that means we aren’t likely to be getting much in the way of important wrestling tonight. Instead, this week is likely to be focused on promos and building towards the pay per view and that’s what’s best for everyone. Now just find a way to make it interesting. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of the social worker taking Dominic away from the Mysterios because Eddie Guerrero is an evil man.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Eddie Guerrero to sit on a ladder, as the match with Mysterio is now a ladder match “for the custody of Dominic.” Eddie says Teddy Long was right and the ladder match is the only solution. Dominic’s custody papers will be hanging above the ring (alas not Dominic himself) and Eddie will be the one to climb the ladder and claim Dominic for himself.

See, Eddie loves his son and the truth always prevails over lies. On Sunday, he’s going to climb the ladder because for every father that loves his son. Eddie starts climbing and dedicates it to his father, brothers and Dominic, who will be the best Guerrero of them all. So smile son, because as of Sunday, Dominic is coming home with Papi.

This is a weird situation as Eddie’s evil was on full display here and in another circumstance it would be incredible, but he’s hindered pretty badly by the material. You can only get so far when there’s an image of an eight year old boy hanging above the ring and spinning around as a ladder match takes place underneath him.

Melina/Joey Mercury vs. Booker T./Sharmell

Fallout from last week and Jillian Hall handles MNM’s entrance. Melina gives Mercury a kiss on the cheek to start as the men get things going. Booker runs him over and chops in the corner so it’s off to the women for a change. Sharmell beats her up for a bit so Mercury comes in, earning himself a rake to the eyes. It’s back to Booker for two off a kick to Mercury’s face but Mercury is right back with a neckbreaker.

A flapjack gets Booker out of trouble and there’s the ax kick into the Spinarooni. With Mercury mostly done, Booker drags him over to force the tag to Melina and it’s time for Sharmell to get in her beatdown. Melina gets in some choking too, followed by a bodyscissors in the rope with Sharmell’s eyes bugging out. Sharmell punches her in the ribs and gets two off a shove as everything breaks down. Jillian trips Sharmell though and Melina grabs a cover with her feet in the ropes for the pin.

Rating: D. The match wasn’t any good and I can’t put any of that on Sharmell, who isn’t a wrestler and isn’t supposed to be able to do any of this. I’m not sure if they’re going to continue with this but Booker is going to need a partner if he’s going to keep fighting with MNM. It’s either this or Animal/Heidenreich working a longer match so I’ll take what I can get here.

Post break Sharmell yells at Booker for not being there to help her. They’re a team and she’s tired of taking beatings. Has she taken another one before tonight?

Orlando Jordan comes up to Chris Benoit and talks trash about how athletic he is. Benoit: “WOW! That’s impressive!” Benoit promises to make Jordan tap on Sunday.

Animal gives Heidenreich his spikes in a moment that isn’t as emotional as they think it is.

Animal/Heidenreich vs. Rudy Silverstein/JP Arson

Non-title and Candice Michelle is guest ring announcer for the sake of curves. House is cleaned in a hurry with slams, chokes and big boots. The Doomsday Device finishes without much trouble. Keeping these things short is the best thing they could do and they know it.

Funaki interviews JBL and shows us a clip of JBL’s attack on Batista last week. JBL says that Batista letting him pick the stipulation for Summerslam was the dumbest thing he could have done. Maybe he should demonstrate that tonight in a No Holds Barred match against….Funaki.

Randy Orton talks about winning the World Title a year ago today in this arena when he defeated Chris Benoit. Tonight it’s a rematch, and then on Sunday he destroys Undertaker’s legacy.

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Funaki

No Holds Barred. JBL chops away in the corner and drops the elbows as the point is pretty clear in a hurry. The fall away slam makes it worse and JBL steals the timekeeper’s belt to whip away. Funaki gets beaten up on the announcers’ table and a whip into the steps keeps him down. A chair shot to the head draws out Batista for a spinebuster and a chair shot of his own, sending JBL running for the no contest.

Rating: D. Just a build towards Sunday and that’s all it should have been. It’s not like the no contest means anything here as it was all about making us care about the title match. Granted that isn’t exactly the case as JBL is hardly a thrilling challenger, though in this case it’s not like they have many better options.

Post match Batista promises violence on Sunday.

Rey Mysterio vs. Simon Dean

Rey is rather somber here. Before the match, Dean talks about how horrible Rey looks and offers a discount on the Simon System family pack. With Rey’s family shrinking, he can have it half (as he suggests someone Dominic’s size) off, so Rey punches him in the face. Cole says Rey hasn’t talked to his son in weeks after putting him in foster care last week, mainly because Cole isn’t that bright.

Mysterio hammers away in the corner but gets dropped face first onto the buckle. Dean stomps away and grabs a kneeling torture rack of all things. That’s broken up and Rey hits a crossbody into the 619 before Dropping The Dime for the pin. Much like earlier, there was no need to make this longer than it was as the point was proven.

Raw Rebound.

It’s time for the Peep Show and Christian is of course beloved for a change. Christian is happy to be here and has a big time guest for this week: HIMSELF! Hang on though as here are the Mexicools to cut him off. Christian: “You better be delivering me some burritos Speedy Gonzalez!” They mess with the set and even pop the inflatable chair. The fight is finally on and Christian gets beaten down, including a moonsault/guillotine legdrop combination. WWE is doing everything they can to get the Mexicools over and the team is trying but I don’t exactly see this having legs.

Mysterio doesn’t like Dominic being in foster care and it’s all because of Eddie. Violence is promised and Rey is bringing his son home with his real father. Rey: “And that’s me!”

Summerslam rundown.

Randy Orton vs. Chris Benoit

Joined in progress with Orton grinding away at a headlock until Benoit reverses into a top wristlock. Benoit starts in on the wristlock but gets reversed into a headlock takeover as they’re going a bit more technical than I would have bet on. Back up and Benoit armdrags him into an armbar but Orton reverses it into another headlock. Since when did Orton get good at this kind of thing?

Back up again and Orton pokes him in the eye, only to get chopped away. It’s too early for the Sharpshooter as Orton pulls him down by the tights. Benoit tries it again so Orton makes the rope as we take a break. We come back with Benoit finally getting the Sharpshooter so Orton has to make the rope again.

Orton sends him shoulder first into the post and plants him with the hanging DDT for two. The chinlock goes on with Orton cranking on it even more than usual. Benoit fights up and Orton can’t hit his over the shoulder neckbreaker so he switches to a DDT for two. As in more neck stuff to set up the cutter, because Orton knows how to do some psychology.

A hard whip into the corner drops Benoit but his head rams into Orton for the double knockdown. The comeback is on with chops and the rolling German suplexes to put them both down again. The Swan Dive connects but here’s Orlando Jordan for the distraction, allowing Orton to hit the RKO for the pin.

Rating: B. These two work well together and it was cool to see Orton do something different. They made sure to protect Benoit with the interference ending which gives Benoit another reason to take the title from Jordan on Sunday. The match was entertaining and long and it was nice to have something good on this show for a change.

Post match the lights go out and Undertaker is in the ring for a chokeslam. Undertaker leaves and Orton smiles, leaving Undertaker confused to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This was very similar to Raw with little in the way of anything big being added to the show and a lot of bad wrestling to go with it. At least this show had a good main event to build it up a bit, though Summerslam is going to need to be quite good given the last week of pretty lackluster TV shows.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also -available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author- page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: August 11, 2005
Location: Nationwide Arena, Columbus, Ohio
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’re less than two weeks away from Summerslam and the card seems to be set on both sides. This time around we need to build more towards the lower half of the card as Randy Orton vs. Undertaker and the World Title match are mostly set. I’m not sure what that is going to mean for tonight though so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Booker T. vs. Joey Mercury

Fallout from last week where Mercury stole a pin on Booker in a tag match. Sharmell is here with Booker while Melina, Nitro and Jillian Hall are here with Mercury. An early Jillian distraction lets Nitro get in a cheap shot so that’s an early double ejection of both Nitro and Hall. Booker hammers away to start and hits an elbow and kick to the jaw.

Mercury is back with a knee to the ribs and a clothesline to set up the chinlock. That’s broken up in a hurry as Booker strikes away even more, setting up a side slam for two. The flapjack into the Spinarooni into the Book End looks to finish but we need a catfight on the floor. Mercury’s rollup gets two so it’s the ax kick to give Booker the pin.

Rating: D+. Just a match here with Booker not exactly breaking a sweat against Mercury. That being said, it’s not like Mercury is supposed to be much on his own, hence the whole team aspect. Booker is a much bigger star and we might see a Tag Team Title match at some point, assuming Booker and Benoit are still partners.

It’s time for the Peep Show with a rather awesome set, including an inflatable flame chair. Christian wastes no time in bringing out Batista as this week’s guest and the fans are rather pleased. Christian can’t believe that he, the biggest Draft pick, isn’t on Summerslam. Batista certainly is though and we hear about the match with JBL.

That’s not cool with Christian, so he’s going to be beating Batista tonight. Batista: “Are you talking to me?” Christian freaks out so Batista takes the mic and says Christian needs an attitude adjustment. The fans seem interested though and the match is made. Better than more of Batista trying to make me interested in another match against JBL.

Heidenreich/Animal vs. Scotty Sabre/Jason Static

Non-title. Heidenreich and Animal jump them before the bell and the beatdown is on in a hurry. A Boss Man Slam hits Sabre so it’s off to Static, who gets his head knocked off by Animal’s clothesline. The powerslam into the Doomsday Device finishes in a hurry.

The Mysterios arrived earlier.

We recap last week’s announcement of Eddie Guerrero wanting custody of Rey Mysterio’s son Dominic.

Randy Orton is returning to the ring tonight and demands to know his opponent. Theodore Long says Orton can find out in the ring. All Orton can know is that it’s a legendary opponent of the Undertaker.

Randy Orton vs. ???

The opponent is…..Kamala, with Kim Chee. Was Damien Demento not available? Kamala slaps his stomach a lot and chops away, followed by more belly slapping. Orton gets in some right hands and a dropkick puts Kamala down. Kim Chee gets on the apron as Orton cranks on the neck. A knee drop gets two and Orton brings Kim Chee inside for an RKO. That fires Kamala up so Orton pokes him in the eye and hits the RKO…as the lights go out. We’ll say that’s the no contest.

Rating: D. Yeah what else were you expecting here? Kamala was 55 at this point and wasn’t exactly someone you expected to win a big match at this best. It was fine as a way to get to the post match stuff and it worked out just fine. The match itself was nothing of course and the setup with Undertaker was all that mattered.

Post match the blue lights come on and the ring fills with smoke. Nothing is said, but it’s a cool visual.

A woman from child protective services is here to observe Eddie and Dominic to decide what is best for tonight. Eddie says he’ll she her what is going on.

Here are Eddie and the social worker, who looks rather intimidated to be in a big arena. After getting the social worker’s name wrong, Eddie talks about wanting to bring Dominic into a home full of….compassion and…..honesty and truth, all of which aren’t the easiest things for him to say. The Mysterios come out and Eddie drops to his knees as Dominic looks confused (as usual).

Eddie blames the Mysterios as the social worker takes notes. With Dominic not coming to him, Eddie gets in Rey’s face and says no one beats him. Rey doesn’t quite agree but Dominic hasn’t spoken a word since Eddie’s story last week. Eddie has beaten everything, including addiction, but he can’t beat Rey. Even when Eddie gets inducted into the Hall of Fame, his plaque will say he couldn’t beat Rey Mysterio.

So the solution is clear: they need to have a match for the custody of Dominic at Summerslam. Eddie doesn’t think so, but Rey calling him a chicken****. Eddie finally agrees and says Dominic comes home with him tonight. Social worker: “Are you kidding me? You people are a bunch of crazies!” Until Summerslam, Dominic is going into foster care. Rey tells him it’s going to be ok and Eddie promises Dominic that the nightmare ends at Summerslam. This went over twenty minutes but the social’s worker’s response was funny and it gave us one of the most infamous match stipulations ever so I can live with it.

Mexicools vs. William Regal/Scotty 2 Hotty

Earlier today, Regal was disturbed by the idea of Scotty’s Worm. Scotty and Crazy start things off with Scotty running him over. A cheap shot from the floor lets Juvy (not in the match) get in some cheap shots though and it’s Crazy hitting a running dropkick. Psicosis comes in with a legdrop for a delayed cover, though he already made a tag for a rather confusing choice of actions. Scotty fights up but Regal drops to the floor instead of accepting a tag, meaning it’s handicap time. Crazy knocks Scotty down and Psicosis’ guillotine legdrop is good for the pin.

Rating: D. Another match designed to be about the angle instead of the match and….do they think I’m going to be interested in Regal turning on Scotty in a match with the Mexicools? I know you have to have some lower level stories but coming up with some more interesting people shouldn’t be that difficult.

Rey and his wife Angie are in tears.

Jillian Hall challenges Booker and Sharmell to a mixed tag against Mercury and Melina. And don’t look at her blemish.

Here’s John Cena’s new music video.

Chris Benoit vs. Simon Dean

Dean calls Benoit a flabby wolverine and the beating is on in a hurry. A few forearms to the back and a clothesline get Dean out of trouble. The front facelock goes on with Dean firing off some knees to the face so Benoit rolls the German suplexes. Three in a row set up the Crossface for the fast tap. Just a step above a squash.

Christian vs. Batista

Non-title. The trash talk is on in a hurry so Batista tells him to bring it on. Christian tries to shove him away from a lockup and is launched into the ropes for his efforts. Some rams into the corner have Christian’s face in some pain and his sunset flip attempt just annoys Batista. A backdrop puts Christian on the floor and a right hand drops him again. Back in and Batista gets sent shoulder first into the post, meaning it’s time for the armbar. Batista powers out of that as well and hits a super backdrop, setting up the shoulders in the corner. There’s the spinebuster but JBL comes in for the DQ.

Rating: C-. This was too short to mean anything but there could have been a nice match in there if they had some more time. What we got was watchable enough though as Batista is getting into the groove of being the top dog. It’s very good that he’s gotten away from HHH for a change though as that was only going to let him get so far. Christian continues to look like a star in the making and at least he didn’t get pinned when he didn’t have to.

Post match Christian offers a distraction and JBL gets in a chair shot to the head. A bunch of chair shots to the back keep Batista down to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. As was mentioned more than once, this wasn’t a show built around adding anything major to Summerslam. The show is set and all we needed was some finalizing of details (you knew Eddie vs. Rey was coming and this just made it official). The build was mostly good, though that Eddie vs. Rey promo could have been cut down by a good bit. The problem is that while it did some good things, it wasn’t in the most interesting way and that brought it down a lot. Not a very good show, but at least it got some things done in a bit of a different way.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Smackdown
Date: August 4, 2005
Location: Harbor Yard Arena, Bridgeport, Connecticut
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’re two and a half weeks away from Summerslam and things are starting to come together. Last week saw Eddie Guerrero go WAY over the line by telling Rey Mysterio and his son Dominick that Eddie was Dominick’s real father, though he’s not done with his stories. Other than that we’re building towards JBL vs. Batista for the World Title. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of the Eddie/Rey situation from last week. Eddie’s “I LIED” was great.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Rey Mysterio to be the first ever guest on the debut edition of the Peep Show. Christian thinks the appropriate question is who’s your daddy and recaps last week until Rey cuts him off. Rey is here because he wants to fight Eddie right now but Eddie comes up on screen. He has the Eddie’s Bedtime Stories book, plus reading glasses to complete the evil look.

Eddie shows off the new I’M YOUR PAPI shirt and thinks it’s time for Chapter Two. Rey tries to cut him off but Eddie, again being the smartest person on the show, just reads over him. Actually hold on as Eddie changes his mind and decides to finish this later. He’ll finish it by the end of the show. Christian jumps Mysterio from behind and lays him out with the Unprettier.

Jillian Hall explains how much the blemish on her face has hurt her soul. We get a closeup look at it and she asks if it’s oozing. She wants people to look her in the eyes because she has a purpose. Her name is Jillian Hall and she is MNM’s fixer. She walks over to Sharmell and Booker T. (good thing they were standing there) and walks on by, with Booker wanting to make sure he didn’t just see that.

MNM vs. Booker T./Chris Benoit

Booker and Nitro start things off, thankfully cutting off Tazz hammering home the fact that Jillian has a big growth on her face. Nitro’s headlock doesn’t work very well as Booker clotheslines him down for two. Benoit comes in for two off a snap suplex but it’s quickly off to Mercury, who gets chopped down as well. It’s way too early for the Sharpshooter though as Nitro pulls Mercury outside as we take a break.

Back with Booker kicking Nitro in the face for two and a neckbreaker is good for the same. Everything breaks down and Benoit gets to snap off the release German suplexes. A Melina distraction lets Mercury break up a belly to back superplex though and Benoit is in trouble for the first time. Well it’s better than more talking about the blemish, because you might not have gotten the idea just yet.

A running knee in the corner keeps Benoit in trouble and the chinlock goes on. That’s broken up with another German suplex and an enziguri is enough for the hot tag to Booker. The Book End gets two on Nitro with Mercury making the save so Benoit Crossfaces Nitro on the floor as well. Melina breaks up the ax kick so Sharmell starts the catfight, only to have Jillian spear her down. The distraction lets Mercury grab a rollup with ropes for the pin.

Rating: C. The Jillian discussions from Tazz sound like they’re written by a ten year old and they’re getting even worse. It’s a joke that might work once but they’re beating it so far into the ground that it loses whatever impact it might have. MNM getting the next title shot (not official but more than likely) makes the most sense as it’s not like there is a division to speak of at the moment.

Raw Rebound.

Long makes Christian vs. Mysterio for the main event.

We look back at Randy Orton costing Undertaker the #1 contendership last week.

Orton promises to make his intentions clear tonight.

Here’s Long to introduce the contract signing for the World Title match. Batista and JBL come out with the latter saying he’s going to get the title back because he’s the wrestling god. Batista says that’s a wrestling fraud, because JBL keeps taking the easy way out. Long gets them both to sit down for the signing with Batista signing in a hurry. JBL laughs at him for signing without filling in a stipulation. Batista says pick what you want so JBL throws out a bunch of goofy ones before picking No Holds Barred. JBL signs and the match is set.

Animal gives Heidenreich face painting permission.

Summerslam rundown.

Animal/Heidenreich vs. Josh Daniels/Damien Adams

Non-title and Heidenreich now has face paint. Adams’ chops have no effect so it’s the swinging Boss Man Slam and the Doomsday Device for the easy pin.

Here’s Randy Orton for his big explanation. Wrestlemania was supposed to be his night when he beat the Undertaker and killed the ultimate legend. Then fate intervened and stopped him, but last week fate intervened again to stop Undertaker from becoming #1 contender. Now, Orton needs to beat the Undertaker because the Undertaker is a legend in WWE.

Undertaker took away his chance at immortality at Wrestlemania so Orton will take away everything he can from Undertaker, including his chance to be World Champion. Orton’s legacy was formed by every veteran that he dropped with an RKO and by becoming the youngest World Champion last year at Summerslam. Therefore, at this year’s Summerslam, he’ll get what he needs when he beats Undertaker. Orton demands an answer right now and then panics when the gong strikes (that never gets old). Undertaker’s voice comes on and says Orton will rest in peace at Summerslam, with RIP appearing on the Titantron.

The Boogeyman is still coming.

An unidentified woman with an envelope arrives to see Eddie. We get some flirting and Eddie promises things will get hotter in the arena.

Christian vs. Rey Mysterio

Rey slugs away to start and hits the slingshot dive to the floor. They get inside for the opening bell and Christian sends him hard into the corner to take over. Rey is back with a kick to the face and some right hands as he’s being more brawlerish here. The springboard seated senton gets two as Eddie and the woman come to the stage.

Back from a break with Christian hammering away and then choking on the ropes. A fireman’s carry gutbuster gets two on Rey and we hit the abdominal stretch. Christian drops some headbutts to the ribs for a change of pace and it’s off to a waistlock. Rey gets dropped ribs first across the top rope and a knee puts him on the floor, much to Eddie’s delight.

A quick throat snap across the top gives Rey a breather but Christian dropkicks him out of the air to put him right back down. Now it’s the seated abdominal stretch as you can’t question Christian’s focus. Christian keeps mixing things up (well done) with a bearhug but Rey slips out and snaps off a hurricanrana for two. We take a break and come back with Rey hitting a DDT for a delayed two more. Rey is right back up with the 619 into Dropping The Dime for the surprise pin.

Rating: C. The back work went on for a good while but it wasn’t bad or anything. Rey’s comeback seemed to mainly take place during the break so it was a little lackluster, but Rey can get sympathy like few others in history. Christian continues to be stuck in the blocks on Smackdown, even though he still feels like a star ready to break out.

Post match Rey wants Eddie to come to the ring but Eddie calls that rude. Instead he introduces the woman as Anna, and asks her to take the Bedtime Stories book to Rey. Either Rey can read Chapter Two or Eddie will do it for him. Rey can’t do it so Eddie says Chapter Two is custody papers.

A court has said that Dominick belongs to Eddie so next week, Rey is bringing him to Eddie. Or maybe not if Rey is nice enough about it though. Rey talks about how he and his wife have raised Dominick and the first word Dominick said was dad. He taught Dominick to ride a bicycle and he took Dominick to the hospital when he broke his arm. They were going to tell Dominick the truth about Eddie but Eddie had to do everything on his own and ruin Dominick’s life.

Rey asks Eddie man to man to not hurt Dominick any more. He even drops to a knee but Eddie says that Anna is his attorney. She just reminded Eddie that Eddie is the real father and he’d never lie to his kids. Dominick is the son that Eddie has longed for and he’ll carry out the Guerrero legacy. Next week, Dominick is Eddie’s son so all Rey has to do is stay tuned for Chapter Three: Dominick Comes Home To His Papi. Cole doesn’t seem all that upset or stunned to end the show. This was rather long, but it’s now getting into that ridiculous territory and that’s a strange place to be given the material of the whole thing.

Overall Rating: C-. The wrestling was mostly fine here, but some of the angles didn’t do much for me. The Eddie vs. Rey stuff continues, but it’s getting to the point of uncomfortable and there is a good chance that we’re going to get into ridiculous. Orton vs. Undertaker II should be good and JBL vs. Batista….well someone has to fight for the title. Summerslam is going to need someone to step up big because I’m not sure if Hogan vs. Michaels is going to be able to carry it. Maybe they’ll surprise us, but they are going to have their work cut out for them.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: July 28, 2005
Location: Blue Cross Arena, Rochester, New York
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

With the Great American Bash out of the way, the only thing left to do is head towards Summerslam. Raw is already out in front though, meaning Smackdown will need to start adding in some matches sooner rather than later. They still have a lot of time to do so and a lot of that can start here. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Theodore Long in the ring to thank us for watching the Great American Bash. I didn’t know Long was into torture. He recaps some of the bigger events from the show, including the Undertaker becoming the new #1 contender. Therefore, at Summerslam, it will be….something that is cut off by JBL. He isn’t happy because Long is forgetting the main event of the Great American Bash where he defeated Batista.

JBL did everything he promised to do but Batista getting himself disqualified prevented him from becoming World Champion. Therefore, Long needs to name him #1 contender again. Long agrees, but the title match isn’t coming at Summerslam. Hang on though as there was a clause in the contract saying that if JBL won, which he did, he would get the first shot at Batista. Long doesn’t like the threats of lawsuits so tonight it’s JBL vs. Undertaker for the Summerslam title shot. Better than a triple threat at least.

Christian/Orlando Jordan vs. Booker T./Chris Benoit

Combination of two Bash matches and Jordan’s shoulder is taped up. It’s a brawl to start with the villains being knocked out to the floor in short order. Booker throws Jordan back inside and Christian has to break up a Crossface attempt. We settle down to Benoit chopping the other Canadian and then grabbing a headlock takeover.

Back up and more chops have Christian rocked so Jordan grabs the boot to bring Benoit down. Jordan comes in for an elbow to the face and a Christian distraction lets Jordan go to work on the turnbuckle pad. The Anaconda Vice has Benoit in more trouble and Christian’s neckbreaker gets two. A chinlock keeps Benoit in trouble until he suplexes his way to freedom and brings in Booker.

The Book End gets two on Christian with Jordan making the save, earning himself a knock to the floor. Back from a break with Booker getting two on Christian and hitting some chops. After ignoring a Benoit tag request, Booker hits the spinebuster and Spinaroonis up. Jordan comes back in for a rake to the eyes so Christian can get two off a reverse DDT.

We hit another chinlock but Christian dives into a kick to the face for the double knockdown. That’s enough for the hot tag to Benoit to snap off the suplexes, including sending Jordan onto Christian. A bunch of German suplexes put the villains down again and it’s the Swan Dive to Jordan’s bad shoulder for two. The Crossface makes Jordan tap.

Rating: C+. The ending is what mattered here as it gives us a reason to set up Benoit vs. Jordan in a rematch where Benoit should certainly win the title. Other than that we have Christian vs. Booker continuing, though I’m not sure how much more of that needs to take place. The match was a rather nice formula tag and didn’t feel as long as it was, which is always a plus.

Heidenreich isn’t sure if he can be the next Hawk but Animal says be yourself. He then gives him a haircut to look more like Hawk.

Video on Eddie Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio from Sunday.

Heidenreich/Animal vs. Chris Hamrick/Chuck Sealy

Non-title, Heidenreich has Hawk’s haircut and it’s Doomsday Device for the pin in about thirty seconds.

MNM want their titles back but Melina say they need to worry about putting a positive spin on things. They have a new publicist and are going to be on the cover of next month’s Smackdown Magazine. For now though, they need to have a fixer, who fixes things. They’ll meet her later tonight. That would be the debuting Jillian Hall, who announces Melina vs. Torrie II with Jillian there to counter Candice Michelle. Oh and Jillian has huge and disgusting growth on her face. After the women leave, Mercury: “Would you?”

Rey Mysterio is in the back with Dominick, who asks what the big secret was. Rey will tell him when he’s older.

The Boogeyman is still coming.

Here are Mysterio and Dominick for a chat. Rey thanks us for the support but here’s Eddie, carrying a book. Rey says this is over and tells Eddie to stay away from his son. Eddie: “Don’t worry Rey. I’m not going to get anywhere near your son.” Eddie insists that he never loses because he’s the law. Yes he agreed to be quiet if he lost at the Great American Bash….but he lied. Now he feels like telling a bedtime story so Rey goes after him, so Eddie is smart enough to drop the bombshell in a hurry: he’s Dominick’s real father. Eddie: “I’m your papi.”

Dominick asks Rey if it’s true and Rey has to admit that it is, sending Dominick running through the crowd. Rey goes after him so Eddie gets in the ring to say the people here don’t smell so good. Now he sits down in a chair and asks for the lights to be dimmed because it’s time for Eddie’s Bedtime Stories. There was a time when Eddie and his wife were separated and Eddie had an affair. Then the woman came to Eddie to tell him that she was pregnant (with her eighth child).

At the same time though, Rey and his wife couldn’t have a child so Eddie had an idea. Instead of being the father, he became Uncle Eddie, even though there were never any official adoption papers. Eddie says that’s a big weight off his shoulders, but just wait until next week’s chapter two. This story just took a hard turn and it is now a lot more uncomfortable than intriguing. Maybe it’s having Dominick there in person or that the feud has been going too long, but this new part isn’t working.

Cole and Tazz do their serious voices, but the show must go on so here’s what’s next.

Melina vs. Torrie Wilson

Jillian (with growth) and Candice at ringside. As Tazz talks about the growth on Jillian’s face (Cole: “ENOUGH WITH THE PUS!”), Melina chokes in the corner and on the mat to start. Torrie gets two off a rollup but Melina hammers away with forearms. We hit the neck crank and get a closeup on the growth because YOU MIGHT NOT GET THE JOKE OTHERWISE. Torrie fights out but gets ax handled in the back. Melina goes to the middle rope for the dive into the boot spot but Torrie can’t get her leg up in time, meaning it hits slightly raised knees instead. Not that it matters as Melina grabs a rollup with feet on the ropes for the pin.

Rating: D-. The match was terrible, but the point here was introducing Jillian and the big joke about her. I get the idea of not having just another good looking blonde out there but they couldn’t think of ANYTHING else? This year, we’ve seen OVW talents with a gimmick of a stutter and a growth on her face, among other bad ideas. Just….come on already people.

Post match, Jillian lays Torrie out.

The Mexicools are in the backstage concessions area and apparently are supposed to be selling them tonight. The boss says get to work and leaves, but the Mexicools think it’s a good idea.

Summerslam is coming. This includes the Divas in a swimsuit car wash.

William Regal vs. Scotty 2 Hotty

Hold on as here are the Mexicools with the concessions for a segment that would get WWE thrown into a fire these days. The referee gets a drink thrown on him, followed by a beatdown for Scotty and Regal. Popcorn and nachos are included. I’m almost scared to know who came up with this idea.

Raw Rebound.

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Undertaker

The winner gets Batista at Summerslam and Jordan is at ringside. Joined in progress after a break with Undertaker shouldering JBL (and his bad ribs) down. Undertaker hammers away at the ribs in the corner and a big boot gets two. More shots to the ribs let Undertaker knock him to the floor, followed by a ram into the barricade. There’s the apron legdrop for two more but JBL finally gets in a shot of his own and hammers away in the corner. The ribs are fine enough for a slam and JBL goes up, only to get superplexed right back down for two more.

Back from a break with Undertaker bouncing off the announcers’ table as Cole freaks out over Jordan’s cheating during the commercial. Undertaker fights back up without much effort and the Downward Spiral gets another near fall. JBL gets in a low blow for two, only to have Undertaker come back with the jumping clothesline. Snake Eyes into the big boot into the legdrop gets two but the referee gets bumped.

Undertaker deals with the invading Jordan by kicking a chair into his face. That lets JBL get in the big boot and a chair to the head for two, with the kickout sending JBL into a panic. There’s a chokeslam to JBL and a right hand to Jordan, the latter of which sends the referee outside. The Tombstone connects but it’s Randy Orton running in with the RKO to give JBL the cheating pin.

Rating: D+. They went into this with an actual doubt of how it was going to go and while the idea that I have to watch JBL vs. Batista again makes my head hurt, I do like Undertaker vs. Orton II. The match was the usual slow Undertaker vs. JBL fight but that’s really all you can expect from JBL at this point.

Overall Rating: D+. There are times where I look at this show in awe. I’m not sure how WWE comes up with all of these bad ideas but they just keep piling on over and over again. Maybe they need some time after all of the new names showing up but egads man, it shouldn’t be this hard. Just stop doing stupid stuff and it should be a better show.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Great American Bash 2005
Date: July 24, 2005
Location: HSBC Arena, Buffalo, New York
Attendance: 8,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s their patriotic show, which isn’t likely to mean much in regards to anything more than the name. The official main event is Batista defending the World Title against JBL but the real main event is Eddie Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio over the secret that Guerrero wants to tell Rey’s son Dominic. I’m not seeing a great show here, but it could be lot worse. Let’s get to it.

The opening video talks about America being a land of opportunity, with each match being tied into the theme. Actually not too bad of an idea.

Tag Team Titles: MNM vs. Animal/Heidenreich

Animal/Heidenreich are challenging. Heidenreich and Mercury start things off with the latter being shoved outside in a hurry. Mercury gets thrown down again and let’s make it a third time for good measure. Animal throws him back inside and then comes in legally for a good reaction. A charge hits raised boot but Animal is fine enough to suplex both champs at the same time.

Nitro gets backdropped onto his shoulder and it’s off to Heidenreich. That means the champs can take him down by the knee with both of them getting a chance to pull on it. A missed charge in the corner allows the tag to Animal so house can be cleaned. Animal runs into a belt shot in the corner but Heidenreich breaks up the Snap Shot. The Doomsday Device is good for the pin and the titles.

Rating: D. It wasn’t very good and it was annoying to see the hot new act lose to a half nostalgia/half garbage team but the fans reacted well and this isn’t likely to be a long term deal. The biggest problem here is having MNM lose, but they’ll probably get the titles back sooner rather than later. At least the crowd got a nice pop to open the show.

Post match, Animal dedicates the win to Hawk.

Eddie Guerrero is happy to be addicted to manipulation. Tonight’s manipulation is that Dominick will be watching from ringside. After the match is over, Dominick can hear a bedtime story.

Christian vs. Booker T.

Sharmell is here with Booker. Christian gets chased to the floor to start so Booker throws him back inside and elbows away. That means the chase continues up the ramp with Booker getting the better of it again. A catapult into the corner gets two but Christian is right back with a reverse DDT for two. The DDT on the arm sets up a chinlock, followed by what would become the Anaconda Vice.

That’s broken up with a foot on the rope and Booker grabs a side slam. Christian sends him into the corner again so Sharmell gets on the apron and slaps Christian in the face. The Book End gets two and a spinebuster plants Christian again. Booker Spinaroonis up and hammers away in the corner, only to get rolled up with a foot on the rope for two. They go outside with Booker sending him into the barricade and post. Back in and Booker hits a super ax kick for the pin. Yeah it’s that quick.

Rating: C-. I don’t know what it was but this was rather boring. It was two guys doing moves to each other until Booker got the win in the end. Uh, great, now he has his revenge. What do they do now? This was a rather nothing match and while it was technically fine, I was never interested in anything they did.

Melina is upset about the loss so she’ll make up for it by beating Torrie Wilson.

US Title: Orlando Jordan vs. Chris Benoit

Jordan is defending and got punched down by Benoit earlier today. They lock up to start with Benoit getting the better of it and kneeing away in the corner. Some kicks to the knee get Jordan out of some of the trouble so Benoit dropkicks him in the knee to show him how it’s done. Benoit sends him outside but misses a baseball slide, allowing Jordan to get in a ram to the barricade.

Back in and Jordan tries to unhook a turnbuckle pad, only to get suplexed a few times in a row. Jordan starts working on the arm with a bunch of cranking and an armbar, but does have time to spell OJ in the air. Benoit gets a double leg takedown and hammers away but Jordan goes right back to the arm by wrapping it around the leg. A seated armbar makes it worse and Jordan’s swinging neckbreaker (Cole: “That works on the neck!”) gets two.

After more arm cranking, Jordan goes up top but gets crotched, setting up Benoit’s top rope superplex. Benoit suplexes him down again and hits the Swanton for two. Jordan gets sent into the corner again and gets the pad off, allowing him to send Benoit face first to retain the title.

Rating: C. And so yes the reign continues, but they set up a rematch if need be. Jordan has held the title for months now and for some reason he still has it, presumably because we need to have the title change on the big stage. The one good thing is they aren’t Jordan as some great champion just because he’s held the title for a few months. Benoit got cheated here and that should set up a title change sooner rather than later. Just get rid of Jordan as soon as possible, for everyone’s sake.

Post match Benoit gets the big hero’s ovation. It’s just an Orlando Jordan match people.

We recap the Undertaker vs. Muhammad Hassan. Muhammad claimed that he was being discriminated against because he couldn’t get a fair shake. He was put in the six way elimination match for the Smackdown Title but Undertaker chased him off. Then Undertaker beat up Daivari, only to have Hassan bring in some men in masks to attack Undertaker (the word terrorist was never said but that’s what they were going for). Since this took place on the day of the London bombings. It did not sit well with a lot of people. Hassan was basically blackballed from UPN, putting his future in jeopardy.

Undertaker vs. Muhammad Hassan

For the #1 contendership and Hassan is carried to the ring by the masked men on a sedan. Before the match, Hassan talks about how unfair everything is and how he’ll prove himself tonight. The masked men surround the ring after Undertaker shows up and the dodging is on in a hurry. Undertaker finally grabs him by the throat and throws Hassan into the corner for the right hands.

A clothesline drops Hassan for two and a Downward Spiral is good for two. Daivari shouts a lot so Undertaker stares down at him, followed by another glare to put the referee on the floor. The distraction lets Daivari pull Hassan away from a big boot and one of the masked men gets in some shots on the floor.

Back in and Hassan gets two off a DDT and we hit the chinlock. That’s broken up in a hurry and a single right hand puts Hassan down. Undertaker stops to go after some masked men though and gets beaten down again as they desperately try to give Hassan a chance. The camel clutch is broken up in a hurry but one of the masked men comes in and gets beaten up as well. Snake Eyes drops Hassan, Undertaker beats up all of the masked men and the chokeslam is good for the pin.

Rating: D. At this point, I’d take anything that was even pretty good or had anything resembling life. Another bad and dull match here with Undertaker beating up six people with no real trouble. Hassan was dead in the water as soon as the terrorist angle took place and this was just a matter of time. At least they kept it short enough, but I still feel horrible for Hassan. He did his job and had his career derailed because of all of these things out of his control.

Post match Undertaker beats up the masked men, Daivari and Hassan. With that out of the way (after a long time), it’s a Last Ride through the stage to write Hassan off for good. I know he wasn’t great, but he should have had a chance to fail on his own instead of being thrown out for the company’s bad idea. They do show Hassan laying on the concrete and convulsing a bit, just for some bonus effect.

Torrie Wilson promises to give the troops something special tonight.

As Hassan is taken out on a stretcher, it’s time for the next match.

Blue World Order vs. Mexicools

It’s the big wheels vs. the lawnmowers, though the Mexicools have rakes so they…..win? I think? Juvy dances away from Nova to start and everything breaks down early on. The blue guys clear the ring and pose, until Juvy hits a springboard spinwheel kick to the back of Nova’s head. Crazy knocks Nova down for two and it’s back to Juvy for a seated abdominal stretch. Nova finally kicks him away and brings in Stevie to the silence you might have expected. Everything breaks down and Stevie misses a charge in the corner, setting up Psicosis’ guillotine legdrop for the pin.

Rating: D-. Were you expecting anything else? The match was thrown onto the card to give the fans a breather after seeing Hassan murdered on television. The wrestling was basically non-existent and the right team won, but this would have felt out of place on Smackdown, let alone on a pay per view.

We recap Eddie Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio, which is all about the fact that Eddie can’t beat Rey. Therefore, Eddie has snapped and gone insane with jealousy, eventually dragging Rey’s family into the whole thing. He has some kind of secret over Rey’s head and if he wins tonight, the secret is out. If Rey wins though, the secret is locked away forever. Or until next week in wrestling logic.

Rey tells his son Dominick that it’ll be ok.

Rey Mysterio vs. Eddie Guerrero

Rey’s son Dominick is at ringside. Before the bell, Eddie demands a handshake to show Dominick what kind of a man Rey is. The bell rings and the beating is on in a hurry with Rey hitting a clothesline but getting knocked down without much effort. Rey gets two off a backslide and stops a charging Eddie with an elbow to the jaw. An atomic drop cuts Rey off and Dominick is looking nervous.

Rey evens things up with a crotching on top, setting up a super hurricanrana for two. Another hurricanrana sets up a 619 to the ribs and the springboard seated senton gets two more. Eddie has a breather on the floor and hides behind Dominick, which goes as well with Rey as you might expect. Even Tazz thinks that’s too far as Eddie gets in a cheap shot and a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker plants Rey back inside.

Eddie goes back to ringside to glare at Dominick some more, followed by a hard whip into the corner to work on Rey’s back again. Another backbreaker gives Eddie three straight near falls and the frustration is on in a hurry. Rey counters another backbreaker into a rollup for two so Eddie grabs the Gory Stretch. With Rey down, Eddie goes to check on Dominick again, allowing Rey to kick him in the face for some near falls.

A tornado DDT gives Rey a delayed two and the comeback is on. The 619 connects to set up the West Coast Pop but Eddie powerbombs him out of the air. Rey rolls out of frog splash range but he can’t do anything else. Two Amigos into a brainbuster let Eddie look down at Rey again and the frog splash connects….but Rey reverses into a crucifix for the pin out of nowhere.

Rating: B-. Dominick destroyed whatever they had going here as you can only cut back to him so many times before I never want to see him again. We reached that point about five minutes into the match so they kept doing it over and over again. It’s the best match of the night so far, but given the low bar that has to clear, it isn’t exactly an accomplishment. The story took a bad turn here and I don’t know if they’re going to be able to get anything back.

Post match, Eddie is stunned and looks to swear more revenge.

JBL isn’t happy with Batista embarrassing him so many times lately and promises to teach Batista a lesson like never before.

Melina vs. Torrie Wilson

Bra and panties match with Candice Michelle as guest referee for reasons of three instead of two. They brawl to start and Torrie grabs an abdominal stretch to pull off Melina’s shirt. A try for the pants gets Torrie kicked to the floor so Melina throws her back in and evens the score. Candice yells at Melina for choking so Melina drops an elbow instead. Torrie makes the comeback with some clotheslines but still can’t get the pants. A hot shot lets Melina get the rather easy win.

Rating: F. Yeah we get it. These matches just do not work in a world where Torrie has already been in Playboy so it’s not like this has any reason to exist other than to hook teenagers without good internet access. This was everything you would expect it to be and then even less.

Post match Melina jumps Candice so it’s a stripping for Melina as well. Oh and Candice strips as well.

We recap Batista vs. JBL. John Cena and the WWE Championship went to Raw in the Draft so we needed a new champ. JBL won the inaugural Smackdown Championship but Batista moved over, meaning JBL was just a #1 contender. That wasn’t cool with JBL, who yelled at Batista a lot and bragged about being a real American. It’s a feud where they have done everything well enough but the lack of drama has hurt things a lot.

Smackdown World Title: John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Batista

Batista is defending. They circle each other to start until JBL gets shoved away off a lockup. Another shove lets Batista pose as they’re not exactly starting fast. JBL knocks him into the corner and hits a right hand, only to get clotheslined outside in a hurry. Back in and Batista’s side slam gets two but JBL runs him down with a shoulder out of the corner.

Another clothesline puts JBL on the floor though as this has been mostly Batista so far. JBL tries to dive off the apron and gets rammed back first into said apron for his efforts. Back in and Batista gets sent shoulder first, followed by a big boot right back to the floor. They go over the announcers’ table in a heap and JBL hits a jumping right hand off the table for a knock down.

That’s good for two back inside, followed by choking and an elbow for two more. Batista’s comeback is countered into a long form sleeper until Batista suplexes his way to freedom. They head outside for about the 14^th time and Batista is sent knees first into the steps. The big running clothesline puts both of them over the barricade though and Batista hammers away again.

Back in and the ref gets bumped, because that’s what this match needed. The spinebuster plants JBL but Orlando Jordan comes in with a chair to Batista’s back. That and a big boot give JBL a very delayed two and the Clothesline From JBL gets….nothing as that referee really can’t take a hit. Batista grabs another spinebuster, backdrops Jordan to the floor, and hits the shoulders in the corner. Jordan tries to come in again so Batista grabs a chair and blasts them both for the DQ, because THIS needs a rematch.

Rating: D-. Another lifeless match with Batista being better than JBL at everything JBL does. Then I had to put up with Jordan in another match and more JBL promos are coming as we probably take this to Summerslam. Batista didn’t even look that dominant and the match was long, sluggish and felt way too similar to the same story of Batista vs. HHH/Ric Flair.

Post match Batista doesn’t like the decision so he Batista Bombs JBL to end the show. Oh wait as Cole has to thank the troops. If this is their gift, it would seem that WWE hates them very much.

Overall Rating: F. This seems appropriate as I’m rather tempted to say various words that start with an F over and over after watching this show. This was HORRIBLE and one of the worst shows I’ve seen in a very long time with nothing showing any energy, some complete wastes of time, some questionable booking decisions and a terrible main event that dares to suggest we might want to see it again. It’s a complete disaster on almost every front and I can’t imagine it actually going worse. Horrible stuff here.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: July 21, 2005
Location: First Mariner Arena, Baltimore, Maryland
Attendance: 3,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s the go home show for the Great American Bash and that means things are mostly set in stone. There are a lot of things that can be built up a bit better though and Sunday’s show could use a bit of that. The show isn’t looking too bad aside from the main event, which is little more than a way for Batista to get his first title defense as Smackdown Champion. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening video is paid for by Friends Of JBL. Everything started for him last year and now it’s time for him to get the title back. Tonight, we get his victory celebration for Sunday’s title victory.

Opening sequence.

Rey Mysterio vs. Super Crazy

The other Mexicools are at ringside too. Rey starts fast with an armdrag and it’s off to a test of strength, which always looks strange from smaller guys. Rey grabs a headscissors but gets dropkicked right back down for two. The threat of a 619 puts Crazy on the floor so he comes back in refreshed and grabs a spinebuster. Crazy stomps away in the corner until Rey manages to send him shoulder first into the post…and here’s Eddie Guerrero.

Back from a break with Eddie on commentary and Rey hammering away in the corner. Eddie uses the time to explain that he’s just doing all this because he loves Rey. Crazy sends Rey out of the corner and the waistlock goes on. As Eddie gets angrier and angrier, Crazy grabs the Rocking Horse to work on all the limbs. That’s broken up so Crazy puts on a seated abdominal stretch.

With that not lasting long, they chop it out as Eddie talks about being the man of the house. The springboard spinning crossbody gives Rey two and a headscissors into the corner is good for the same. Another springboard is broken up though and Crazy gets two off a springboard moonsault. Rey is right back with a headscissors into 619 position, drawing Eddie in with a rake (stolen from Psicosis) to Rey’s back for the DQ.

Rating: C. This was long but they did the smart thing by not having either of them take a fall. They seem to have plans for the Mexicools so having them lose this early would be a bad idea. Eddie was going even crazier on commentary and it makes the heel turn work that much more. He can be all sinister in his regular promos but now he’s breaking down into just pure obsession and madness.

Post break Eddie is going to leave but Theodore Long says not so fast. Eddie is wrestling tonight against a mystery opponent.

Christian brags about beating Booker T. last week and promises to beat him again on Sunday. If Josh Matthews doesn’t like it, go back to his parent’s house and his basement room and complain about it on the internet. Booker is going to be a two time two time loser.

Heidenreich reads Animal a poem about feeling Hawk’s presence and how big of a chance this is. Animal says Heidenreich is more like Hawk than he thought. Heidenreich: “What a rush.” Oh give me a break.

JBL is a Great American. Like Neil Armstrong.

Animal/Heidenreich vs. Nick Berk/Julio Dinero

Powerslam and Doomsday Device finish in thirty seconds. MNM is shown panicking in the back.

Raw Rebound.

Eddie Guerrero vs. ???

It’s…..Chris Benoit, because that’s as much of a guaranteed good match as you can get. Before the match, Eddie tries to run so Benoit calls him in, saying they’ve been close friends for years. Eddie gets back in and decks Benoit to start in a hurry. A chair is brought in but the referee takes it away, only to have Eddie kick Benoit low for an early two. Eddie’s boot rake over the face but Benoit snaps off a German suplex as we take a break.

Back with Eddie wrapping the knee around the post and sending him face first into the announcers’ table. Eddie cranks on the leg and puts on a leglock, sending Benoit rolling over to the ropes. Benoit fights up and tries the Sharpshooter but the knee gives out. That means the leglock goes right back on so Benoit makes it to the ropes again, though a bit more slowly this time.

Eddie goes up but gets headbutted and superplexed back down, with Benoit busted open after the headbutts. Being the smart villain, Eddie kicks at the cut but Benoit snaps off the rolling German suplex for a double knockdown. The Swan Dive gets a delayed two with Eddie getting a boot on the rope. Back up and Eddie tries the Three Amigos, only to get reversed into the Crossface. Eddie is in the ropes within about two seconds….and takes the countout.

Rating: B. That’s about the standard for these two as they don’t know how to have a bad match. They’re one of the best pairings you can find and it was no exception here. This was the second match in a row where you don’t want either of them taking a fall so it was the right way to go. I could get used to this thinking things through concept.

Post match Rey jumps Eddie and beats him up on the stage.

We look back at Undertaker beating up Muhammad Hassan’s attorney last week.

Here’s Candice Michelle for a special announcement: the Great American Bash will be available for free to the military. Yeah we already knew that. Cue Melina, who isn’t happy that Candice is guest referee for Melina vs. Torrie Wilson on Sunday. Melina doesn’t like Candice and goes for her clothes, only to have Torrie run in for the save. Candice is so humiliated that she dances a bit.

Video on the Great American Bash press conference.

Booker T. vs. Simon Dean

Simon says Sharmell goes to the buffet line five times, five times, five times, five times, five times and the beating is on in a hurry. Booker doesn’t waste time and punches, kicks and kicks some more, setting up the ax kick for the pin in a hurry.

Post match Booker says Christian is just like that Richard Simmons Tae Bo wannabe.

JBL is a Great American. Like Ronald Reagan.

The Boogeyman is coming.

Long video on Guerrero vs. Mysterio.

Great American Bash rundown, with the Blue World Order vs. the Mexicools added.

It’s time for JBL’s victory celebration, meaning the ring is covered in red, white and blue. Orlando Jordan handles the introduction and the confetti cannons go off. JBL looks like Uncle Sam/Apollo Creed and comes to the ring in an open topped Cadillac just to complete the visual. He talks about some great Americans and brags about how awesome America is.

We take over countries because we can and because we should, since might has always been right. We do give to the poor nations who need a handout, but some Americans are weak. Like Batista, who ran away from JBL at Wrestlemania like a coward. JBL isn’t happy about Batista being on the cover of Smackdown Magazine. This is his show, but don’t worry because next month, there will be a new issue on the newsstand.

We see a new cover, with JBL holding the title over a fallen Batista. On Sunday, Batista is getting put down because there are legends and Hall of Famers, but there is only one wrestling god. Cue Batista to call JBL out for looking like an idiot. Batista calls him a phony and a bully so on Sunday, JBL is getting exposed. The fight is on and Batista cleans house, including putting on the Uncle Sam hat and jacket to end the show. They’re trying to do something with this, but JBL is little more than target practice for Batista and Guerrero vs. Mysterio is the real main event and they aren’t trying to hide it.

Overall Rating: C-. This show ran into the problem of not being able to do anything else with Mysterio vs. Guerrero. The story has been set up for a few weeks now and there isn’t anything left for them to do with it. Batista vs. JBL isn’t doing anything for me, but Christian vs. Booker should be good and…..yeah two matches are enough to carry a show, right? Not a great show here, but Eddie vs Benoit got us far enough.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: July 14, 2005
Location: DCU Center, Worcester, Massachusetts
Attendance: 3,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

Things got a lot more interesting/controversial last week with the whole Muhammad Hassan/Undertaker situation. I’m not sure how they can follow up on that given all of the fallout that comes from it but it should be interesting. We are also ten days away from the Great American Bash, which doesn’t have much of a card yet. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Batista vs. JBL, which doesn’t exactly make me think the title is in jeopardy. This also means another look at the Blue Meanie beating JBL, which somehow wasn’t the most interesting thing that happened last week.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Eddie Guerrero to get things going. After taking a few minutes to soak in some hatred, Eddie says Rey Mysterio isn’t here tonight. See, Rey thought that he was going to be able to avoid being humiliated tonight by not being here, but that’s not how it works. All that matters is that Eddie knows something Rey wants to keep from everyone from knowing. We see a clip of Eddie making Rey beg him for mercy last week. Eddie: “You should have seen what I planned out for this week!” Eddie isn’t done yet though because he wants to talk to Rey’s son Dominick.

After ordering Tony Chimmel to give up his chair, Eddie has a seat and talks about a boy named Dominick who lived a long time ago and far away. Then one day, Dominick went out into the woods to play….but here are Eddie’s wife Vickie and their kids. Eddie goes to the floor and introduces his family to the crowd before screaming at them to go to the back. Vickie says this is getting out of hand and this secret, whatever it is, needs to be kept quiet because it could hurt a lot of people, including Rey. Eddie grabs her by the neck and forces her to the back in an uncomfortable moment.

Post break, Eddie yells about how this is what he does and Vickie needs to worry about the girls like she is supposed to. Hardcore Holly of all people tries to intervene and gets shoved away. Vickie is put into the card and, despite protesting the whole time, drives away with the kids.

Mexicools vs. Scotty 2 Hotty/Paul London/Funaki

Super Crazy stars with London and gets chopped up against the ropes, only to have Juvy get in a knee to the back from the apron to take over. Juvy comes in to work on the armbar and it’s Super Crazy coming in as well for a double basement dropkick to Scotty’s head. Scotty tries to fight out of the corner as Cole freaks out over not knowing what THE JUICE means.

Juvy gets knocked down and the diving tag brings London back in. Some dropkicks take the Mexicools down and it’s a belly to back suplex to drop Juvy again. Psicosis and Crazy break up the 450 though, allowing Crazy to hit his own moonsault. Juvy’s 450 is enough to put London away.

Rating: C-. So the Mexicools have finally debuted and….yeah it’s three good luchadors in a trios match. I’m not sure what this was supposed to accomplish other than getting their foot in the door because they weren’t all that impressive. At the same time though, how far has London fallen since winning the title? I know it doesn’t mean anything but good grief. Drop the title if that’s how worthless they see it being.

Christian hits on Candice Michelle by offering any help she may need but Booker T. and Sharmell interrupt. Booker isn’t impressed so Christian tells him to back off. A match is set for later.

Batista talks about watching Smackdown while he was on Raw, where he saw JBL as a loudmouthed bully. At the Great American Bash, the bully is getting beaten up and getting an attitude adjustment.

Melina tells MNM that she’ll catch up with them in the ring. She goes over to Torrie Wilson and isn’t happy with a fan asking Torrie for an autograph. Whatever Torrie can do, Melina can do it better. They’ll fight at the Bash and let’s make it a bra and panties match.

Heidenreich comes out for a match but gets jumped by MNM. Heidenreich gets posted so Melina asks where his friends are now. Cue Road Warrior Animal of all people for the save, because the Legion of Doom has a new DVD out and we need to promote it somehow. To be fair though, the fans do go nuts for him.

MNM bails so Animal grabs the mic and plugs the DVD before saying he doesn’t like MNM declaring themselves the best team of all time. Mercury calls Animal old and gives the Road Warriors a title shot at the Bash. Nitro: “We can’t do that. His partner is dead!” Animal is ready to snap but Heidenreich calms him down and offers to team with him at the pay per view. The match is made.

We look back at the opening segment with Eddie getting creepier than usual.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Hardcore Holly

They start with the shoving again until Eddie chops him in the corner. More chops against the ropes have Holly in trouble but another corner version misses. Holly knocks him to the floor and we take a break. Back with Eddie chopping away some more until Holly armdrags him into an armbar.

A drop toehold sends Holly face first into the buckle so it’s time to step on Holly’s face. Eddie’s figure four necklock is powered up into an electric chair and they’re both down. Holly hits a backdrop and dropkick for two, followed by a full nelson slam for the same. A top rope clothesline gets the third two in a row but the Alabama Slam out of the corner is blocked.

That’s fine with Holly, who hits his kick to the very low ribs. They head outside with Holly going shoulder first into the post and back first into the apron. The referee gets poked in the eye, probably not by mistake, and Eddie hits Holly in the knee with a pipe. A Texas Cloverleaf makes Holly tap.

Rating: C. I know Holly gets some eye rolls at times but he can wrestle a fine match like he did here. Granted it’s against Eddie Guerrero so it’s almost guaranteed to be at least decent, but Holly held up his end as well. It’s also a nice sign to have Eddie’s jealous madness getting to other people as well, which it really should at this point.

Post match Eddie apologizes to Vickie and says she knows he would never hurt her or the kids. Now, he’s going to prove how much he loves Vickie by giving Rey a chance. They can fight again at the Bash (they’re booking this show in a hurry tonight) and if Rey beats him, the secret will never be told. If Eddie wins though, the secret is coming out.

Muhammad Hassan is not here tonight, but we will have a prepared statement from Hassan’s attorney.

Post break here is the attorney for the statement. You can tell he’s an attorney because he wears a suit, has a briefcase, and the announcer tells us that he is an attorney. Oh and he stops to put on reading glasses before clearing his throat. His name is Thomas Whitney Esq. and the statement talks about Hassan taking a break from Smackdown due to everything that has happened in the last week.

Hassan has American rights and it is a sad day when he has to retain an attorney to protect those rights. Hassan will not be back until after he defeats the Undertaker at the Great American Bash….and there’s the gong. One long entrance and a beating later and we’re done. Whitney wouldn’t be done in wrestling, though it helped a lot when he shaved his head and changed his name to Tommaso Ciampa.

Christian vs. Booker T.

Hold on though as Christian jumps him from behind in the aisle. Booker is sent into various steel objects (steps, post) but the referee lets the match start anyway. Therefore, the Unprettier finishes Booker in about fifteen seconds.

The Boogeyman is coming.

Great American Bash rundown, with Christian vs. Booker T. as the fourth match added during this show.

Here’s Orlando Jordan with JBL for the main event, but first JBL needs to rant about last week. That was a humiliating night for him as he was beaten up by someone who should have bought a ticket to see him. The Great American Bash is his pay per view and we will see what the Wrestlemania main event should have been. There are all time greats, but there is only one wrestling god.

Batista vs. Orlando Jordan

Non-title. Batista starts with the shoulders in the corner before hitting another one in the middle of the ring. Jordan gets back in but JBL offers a quick trip to pull Batista outside. That means a whip into the steps (popular weapon tonight) so Jordan can start working on the knee to take over. An argument with the referee lets JBL wrap the leg around the post to keep Batista down.

Jordan lays on the leg but Batista pops up for the shoulders in the corner. A powerslam plants Jordan but JBL has to be knocked off the apron. With JBL dispatched and the referee bumped, the spinebuster into the Batista Bomb….is broken up by a JBL chair shot. That gets a close two so JBL tries the Clothesline, only to get knocked away without much effort. Now the Batista Bomb can finish Jordan.

Rating: D+. It wasn’t a very good match but it also set up some things for the future. This was about setting up Batista vs. JBL at the Great American Bash, which may not be sounding like the most thrilling match but it is something that gives Batista his first win as Smackdown Champion. There wasn’t much of a sweat over Jordan, but was there really supposed to be one?

Post match JBL kicks Batista in the bad knee and hits the Clothesline. Posing with the title ends the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This was a show that illustrated how weak things could be. Other than Eddie/Rey, there isn’t much on here that I really want to see. There did set up a lot of stuff for the Bash, but it includes what will be a nacho break match and Animal getting a title shot (the LOD was great but Animal and Heidenreich…..not exactly). The top half of Smackdown is going to be very good but outside of that, I’m really not sure how the rest of the show is going to go. One or two strong angles can carry a show, but if one of those doesn’t work, they’re in big trouble. Not a terrible show, but the lack of depth is showing.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: July 7, 2005
Location: ARCO Arena, Sacramento, California
Attendance: 10,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’re coming up on the Great American Bash but more importantly we are finally set as far as the roster moves go. The roster may not look as strong as it did before but Smackdown has Batista now and that is the only logical followup to losing John Cena over to Raw. Now we get to see where things go. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Cena moving over to Monday, meaning a champion was needed. That looked to be JBL but Batista showed up instead. That’s a rather cruel way to treat JBL actually, as he won that match on his own last week.

Here’s a sneering JBL to open things up. Last week’s screwjob makes what happened to Bret Hart in Montreal look like a parking ticket. He should be Smackdown Champion but now we have Batista on Smackdown instead. JBL is #1 contender though and he isn’t scared of the Animal, because tick tock. The time is ticking on Batista’s time as World Heavyweight Champion and it’s time for the man who looks like Tarzan to fight like Jane.

JBL’s music starts and here’s the limo….containing the Blue World Order, with Stevie Richards as Orlando Jordan, the Blue Meanie as JBL and Nova as the combined forces of the Bashams. Richards introduces us to JBL: John Blue Lamefield, and Ash Me (Ash Me?). Richards dubs himself Bluewheat to some rather weak responses. JBL is really not impressed and orders them out of here before they embarrass him.

Richards says JBL embarrassed himself at One Night Stand because he disrespected ECW and everything they stood for. JBL rants about how Richards wasn’t good enough to flip burgers and Meanie took the beating he deserved. Meanie wants JBL in a match tonight and that’s agreed to in a hurry. We’re not done yet though as the BWO spray paint the limo. That happens a lot around here.

Chris Benoit vs. Booker T.

For the #1 contendership to the US Title. They go technical to start as you might have expected with Benoit shrugging off a hammerlock and grabbing a hiptoss. That’s good for a standoff so Benoit starts in with the chops to take over. Booker manages to snap him throat first across the top rope, followed by a superkick for two. The armbar goes on, followed by a quick ax kick for two.

That means more armbarring, as it certainly seems to be working so far. This time it’s Benoit fighting back and snapping off the German suplexes but the Swan Dive is blocked. Booker nails a superplex for a very delayed two before trying a cross armbreaker of all things, sending Benoit to the ropes. The arm is fine enough to slap on the Crossface and make Booker tap.

Rating: C+. These two could have a passable match in their sleep and that is more or less what they did here. Benoit is going to be fine going into the US Title match at the Bash, even if it is going to take something incredible to make a match with Jordan work. I’m not sure where this leaves Booker, but he’s going to do well enough against anyone, which is a good way to build up someone new.

Sharmell is disappointed at the loss but Jordan scares her off and takes her place in front of the monitor.

We recap Eddie Guerrero going nuts last week and making Rey Mysterio beg him not to tell Rey’s son Dominick the truth. The emotion in this stuff is rather awesome and they’re both selling it incredibly well.

Mysterio comes up to Eddie in the back and asks him to rethink things. Eddie feigns ignorance so Rey lays it out for him. He begs Eddie not to do this, but Eddie needs a partner tonight to face MNM. That’s a no, but Eddie’s feelings are hurt. Instead, he’ll just go to the ring by himself and tell everyone the truth about their little secret. Rey: “Wait…Eddie.” Eddie: “We having a change of heart here or something?” Eddie says he loves Rey and the only thing he wants is the best for Rey and Dominick. See you out there, partner.

Muhammad Hassan and Daivari rant about the six man match last week. Hassan was never eliminated and should be the #1 contender to Batista. Instead, Theodore Long puts him in a #1 contenders match with the Undertaker. Oh dear it’s time to get here. As for tonight, it’s Daivari vs. Undertaker.

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Blue Meanie

No DQ. During the intros, we hear about JBL and Meanie’s issues, including at One Night Stand, but without any specifics as to what JBL did. JBL boots him in the face before the bell and stomps away in the corner before taking him outside to continue the beating. Meanie goes into various hard objects and his comeback attempt goes as well as you would expect.

JBL beats up the rest of the BWO and it’s time for a chair, plus Richards for a bonus. Richards gets in a scary chair shot to the head and Meanie adds a DDT. The Meaniesault gets two and here’s Jordan to distract Meanie. The Clothesline From JBL connects but Batista comes in and gives JBL the spinebuster so Meanie can steal the pin.

Rating: D-. This has been Avoiding Lawsuits With WWE as the BWO guys were just some annoyances to JBL who stole a win to help advance Batista vs. JBL. They kept it short and Meanie got in almost no offense without major help so it’s not like this hurts JBL or anything. Just get it over with and move on so Meanie won’t sue. I get why it had to happen and it wasn’t the worst thing ever or even close. Just a quick thing that we had to get through.

Tag Team Titles: MNM vs. Rey Mysterio/Eddie Guerrero

MNM is defending and Eddie forces Rey to smile in a funny moment. Eddie takes over on Mercury’s arm to start and demands a tag for the sake of Dominick. Rey reluctantly comes in and hits a basement dropkick for two on Mercury. It’s back to Eddie for Three Amigos but Eddie stops to throw Nitro to the floor instead of covering. The frog splash connects for two anyway, with Eddie pulling off of the pin.

Rey comes in for two instead and Eddie blasts him from behind. Eddie goes to sit down at ringside as Rey takes a double gutbuster to set up the chinlock. Rey fights up and hurricanranas Nitro into the 619 as the comeback is on. The springboard legdrop gets two….as Eddie jumps Rey and beats him up. Eddie chills on the top rope as Rey takes the Snapshot to retain the titles.

Rating: C. It’s a hard one to grade as this was an angle instead of a match. That makes things more interesting too, as we’ve done the Eddie/Rey Tag Team Titles run before. Eddie is completely out there at this point and that makes things a lot different. I’ve loved this story so far and this is a rather nice new twist on things.

Post match Eddie asks Rey if he wants to hit him, but it would cost Rey their little secret. Rey wants to leave but Eddie shoves him in the face and makes Rey hold the ropes open for him. Eddie: “Dominick would LOVE to open the ropes for Uncle Eddie.” Rey reluctantly agrees as the mind games continue.

Raw Rebound.

Christian talks about how awesome he is and how he’s ready for Batista tonight. That’s how he rolls.

Matt Morgan vs. William Regal

This is Regal’s Smackdown debut, or at least it would be if the Mexicools didn’t come out and jump Morgan. Regal looks impressed as the beatdown goes on. Juvy talks about how they’re going to keep making an impact week after week. Psicosis: “Your a** is grass and we are the lawnmowers!”

And that’s it for Matt Morgan, because WWE saw no value in someone who looks like that with that kind of size and felt the need to give him a bad stutter as his only gimmick. Instead, we’re getting the continuing adventures of three guys riding a lawnmower and talking about being cool. Wrestling can be a stupid place at times.

Daivari panics about facing Undertaker but Hassan says that the sacrifice has a reward. He has a plan.

Daivari vs. Undertaker

Daivari bails to the floor before the smoke clears from around ringside but Hassan throws him back in. The chokeslam and Tombstone finish Daivari in a hurry.

And then it happens. Hassan drops to his knees and begins to pray. Five men in ski masks and camo pants, one with a club, run in and beat Undertaker down. One of them pull out a steel wire and choke him out, allowing Hassan to put on the camel clutch. The masked men carry Daivari out like a martyr as Hassan glares at Undertaker.

The announcers do their serious talk about what they just saw.

I’m not sure what to say about this other than I still feel sorry for what happened to Hassan here. The angle itself was always going to be controversial. Now that’s fine on its own and I could see how something like this could have worked if WWE had been capable of pulling it off. However, the problem was this show aired the night of the London Underground bombings. WWE aired a statement saying that the segment would be controversial, but they really needed to just cut the segment entirely. It was a situation where real life was more important than wrestling and there was no way this would go over.

This was more or less it for Hassan, as UPN decided they didn’t want him on their network anymore (the character, not the person) and there was nothing WWE could do. Hassan would wrestle one more time, as the Great American Bash, and then never be seen again. Hence why I’ve always felt sorry for Hassan, whose career was basically ended because of an angle that took place and aired the day of a horrible incident.

WWE could have done something else (air an interview, a clip from Raw or SOMETHING else, even something from last week) but instead they put a disclaimer on there and let Hassan’s career be ended. WWE didn’t know how bad it could have gone, but I would have hoped they would know better than to let this air the day of something that bad. Hassan was going to be a big deal (apparently taking the title from Batista at Summerslam) and while I’m not sure how well he would have done, he never got the chance because of something that wasn’t his fault, and that isn’t fair.

Christian vs. Batista

Non-title. Batista throws him around to start and Christian isn’t sure what to do. A hard running shoulder puts Christian on the floor and we take a break. Back with Christian getting punched out of the air and it’s time to head outside. Christian posts him and then sends him face first into the steps for the first breather he’s had.

Back in and Christian gets two each off a DDT and neckbreaker, followed by the required chinlock. A middle dropkick and some ax handles to the back set up another chinlock to keep Batista down. Batista powers up into an electric chair drop and there’s a World’s Strongest Slam. The spinebuster and Batista Bomb finish Christian.

Rating: C-. Christian was little more than a sacrificial lamb here and that’s all well and good. Batista is going on to bigger things on Smackdown so throwing Christian out there was a fine way to give him a first win. The match went as it should have and Batista looked dominant in a watchable match with little drama.

Post match JBL and Orlando Jordan run in to go after Batista, meaning it’s a beating for Jordan to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. Well it was certainly eventful. This was as all over the place of a show as you could ask for with the JBL/Meanie shenanigans, a build to the Great American Bash main event, another direction in Eddie vs. Rey and that whole controversy deal which ended Hassan’s career. It was one of the most eventful shows I’ve ever seen but there is one thing that anyone is going to talk about coming out of this show. That’s understandable as well, but dang it’s a shame when so much else happened here.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: June 30, 2005
Location: Arrowhead Pond, Anaheim, California
Attendance: 15,449
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s a big night for Smackdown with the first ever Smackdown Champion being crowned in a huge elimination match. That could change things up a good bit around here, but so could the final two Draft picks, who will be making their debuts tonight. I’m sure those stories won’t intertwine at all. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of the setup of the elimination match, featuring JBL, Undertaker, Booker T., Chris Benoit and Muhammad Hassan. Big Show was originally in the match but got sent to Raw so the match has been downsized a bit.

Opening sequence.

Here are Hassan and Daivari to open things up. Hassan hates how he is treated in America because they don’t feel free. Everyone judges them everywhere they go but it ends tonight as he becomes Smackdown Champion. Hassan brags about beating Big Show last week and promises to win again tonight. He declares the day of the Dead Man over and there’s the gong. Hassan starts backpedaling by talking about how legendary Undertaker is. Undertaker may have beaten a lot of people but he has never beaten Hassan. Daivari’s chair shot completely fails and it’s a chokeslam for the lackey as Hassan bails.

Cruiserweight Title: Chavo Guerrero vs. Paul London

London is defending in what feels like the 197^th match between these two. Chavo gets taken over with a headlock to start and it’s time to bail into the ropes. The chase is on until Chavo gets in a cheap shot to take over. The stomping and choking are on and a clothesline gets two. London dropkicks him out of the air…and here are the Mexicools. They surround the ring and charge in for the double DQ because this feud MUST CONTINUE.

Rating: D+. It was nice enough while it lasted and then turned into the same thing they did last week. The cruiserweights feel as unimportant as they have ever been and these matches without a finish are not helping anything. Normally I would say change the title, but it’s not like anyone is going to be able to do any better.

Post match the beatdown is on, including Psychosis knocking out timekeeper Mark Yeaton. Juvy talks about hoe gringos don’t like Mexicans and wants them to rise against said gringos. We get the formal introduction of the team and Juvy wants us to join a revolution. Yeah it’s bad and someone will be upset at the racial aspect, but it’s still way more interesting than anything else in the division for a long time.

We get some graphics from Wrestlemania 21 with a preview for tonight’s main event. Hassan is absent, with Cole saying he wasn’t at Wrestlemania 21. It was less than three months ago. No one could check that line?

Video on last week’s great Eddie Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio match.

Eddie says he was smiling last week because he knows the truth. Tonight, Rey is going to beg him to tell the truth.

Melina is stretching and Nitro/Mercury are admiring the view. She name drops a lot of celebrities coming to watch her in-ring debut tonight. She’s got this one on her own too.

Video on the European tour.

Melina vs. Michelle McCool

Melina is putting her makeup on during Michelle’s entrance. Michelle spears her down to start and throws a running Melina back inside. A basement dropkick gets two as Tazz brings up the rather small size of Michelle’s gear. Melina gets in a cheap shot and powerbombs Michelle out of the corner for the pin, albeit with a grab of the rope. It was short, but they were both trying and it was nowhere near as bad as some similar matches have been.

Post match Nitro and Mercury come in to give Michelle the Snapshot. Heidenreich makes the far too late save.

Here’s Eddie for a chat. Last week people thought he was a loser, but the only loser was Rey Mysterio. Eddie is a winner in life because he has overcome obstacles people can only dream about. He has gone on a journey and just for fun, he filmed the whole thing. The journey involves one of Rey’s family members so here’s the footage.

We see Eddie at a playground, which happens to be at Rey’s son Dominick’s daycare. Eddie wonders if Dominick likes secrets and bedtime stories. He gives Dominick some candy and promises him a bedtime story he’ll never forget. The creepy smiling continues but Eddie makes it work very well.

Back in the arena, Eddie asks Rey if he should tell everyone their little secret. Cue a serious Rey with no music to ask Eddie not to go there. Eddie shoves him down and asks what happened to the fire in Rey’s eyes. Eddie demands that Rey get on his knees and beg him not to tell the truth. Rey does drop to a knee so Eddie pulls out….licorice, asking if Rey want some candy. It gets shoved into Rey’s face and Eddie says chew on that. More good stuff from these two with awesome delivery, but I’m scared of where this could go.

We recap the setup of the elimination match.

Smackdown Title: John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Booker T. vs. Undertaker vs. Muhammad Hassan vs. Chris Benoit

For the inaugural title under elimination rules and you have to tag. It is made clear that ANY form of contact counts as a tag. Also, you can be eliminated by countout or DQ. Hang on though because here’s Theodore Long to make this a six man match again, thanks to the newest Draft pick.

Smackdown Title: John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Booker T. vs. Undertaker vs. Muhammad Hassan vs. Chris Benoit vs. Christian

No Tomko in sight. For the sake of time, Undertaker just appears in the ring without doing the full entrance and stares Christian down as everyone else bails. Undertaker throws him into the corner and we settle down to Undertaker beating Christian up with ease. Hassan gets tagged in and fear ensues as we take a break.

Back with Undertaker beating up Hassan some more and there’s Old School for a bonus. JBL tags himself in and gets punched off the apron, meaning there’s a delay before he can come in and get chopped by Benoit. A flying shoulder knocks JBL down and it’s a German suplex for two, sending JBL over for a tag to Hassan. An exchange of suplexes goes to Benoit (duh) so Hassan forearms him in the back instead. That just earns him another suplex and Hassan lands in front of Undertaker.

For some reasons Hassan punches him in the face, which counts as a tag, so Undertaker unloads on him. This includes a chair to the back….and that’s a DQ to get rid of Undertaker. We take a break and come back with Hassan having been eliminated due to getting massacred, leaving us with Booker vs. Benoit at the moment. Booker kicks him in the face for two but Benoit grabs a German suplex for his own near fall. The abdominal stretch goes on, albeit with Benoit down on a knee.

Some forearms to the back have Booker down until he suplexes his way to a breather. An enziguri puts Booker down but he fights off the Sharpshooter. The second attempt works just fine though with Booker having to roll away. Benoit tries to switch to the Crossface but JBL tags himself in for some neckbreakers. Benoit tags himself right back in and hits a superplex on Booker, but JBL tags himself and DDTs Benoit for the elimination. JBL smiles down at the banged up Booker and we take a break.

Back with Booker kicking JBL in the face so Christian tags himself back in to hammer on Booker. The chinlock goes on, followed by the neck crank to mix it up a bit. It’s back to the chinlock for some rather blatant spot calling. Christian walks into the flapjack and the comeback is on with some right hands. JBL tags himself back in to kick Booker in the face for two but it’s Christian with another blind tag.

A top rope clothesline gets two on JBL and a tornado DDT is good for the same as the fans are into Christian. Another JBL neckbreaker gets two on Christian and we hit the chinlock. That’s broken up as well and it’s back to Booker for the chops in the corner. A sidekick (more like a knee) to the jaw sets up the missile dropkick for two more as these near falls are getting strong reactions.

The Book End gets a very close two and we take another break. Back again with JBL getting powerslammed out of the air for two but Christian tags himself back in and rolls Booker up for the elimination. It’s Christian vs. JBL for the title and the Clothesline From JBL is good for the pin and the title a few seconds later.

Rating: C. This was more long than good with all of the blind tags seeming like they would have made more sense in a one fall match. That being said, they were smart to not have Hassan take another fall and no one came out of it looking weak. It was a well booked match and going over half an hour prevented it from a bunch of lame exits, but it still wasn’t all that great and dragged multiple times.

Post match here’s Long to say that JBL won the match….but he’s only going to be #1 contender because the Smackdown title isn’t needed. See, we have one more Draft pick: the World Heavyweight Champion Batista. That was the logical switch and it gets Batista away from HHH so it’s a bunch of positives in one.

Overall Rating: C-. This whole show was built around one match and that’s a good thing, as there wasn’t exactly much else going on. Eddie and Rey had their usual good segment but Melina vs. Michelle was pretty bad and the Mexicools aren’t exactly looking like the next big thing. Next week is going to be the big start of the real new era and it should be interesting to see how the fans take to all of the new stars and stories that come with them.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6