Today we look at one of the most well traveled wrestlers of all time: Fit Finlay.

Of course Finlay got his start in Europe, working for his father’s promotion in Ireland. It’s almost impossible to find anything that regional, but there’s some more available stuff from his time in England. Here’s a match against Young David, more famous as the British Bulldog, from March 12, 1982.

Fit Finlay vs. Young David

Finlay is Irish Middleweight Champion. As is traditional with British wrestling, this is under a round system (eight five minute rounds here) and it’s 2/3 falls. The ring is fall smaller than most that you would see in America. David cranks on the arm to start and gets a quick one off a sunset flip. They hit the mat for some arm work until Finlay grabs a wristlock. David spins around and grabs one of his own as we’re firmly in technical mode here.

Finlay comes back with a leg lock as the well dressed crowd looks on intently. David grabs a wristlock but Finlay bridges out and snapmares David down. Off to an arm lock by Finlay as this is being treated as something serious. It’s very interesting to see something as different as we’re getting here. Finlay goes back to the wristlock and even a David slam can’t break the grip. A snapmare puts Finlay down and the first round ends.

The match is clipped to the start of round four (every version I can find of this has the clip) and they stare each other down. Finlay takes over with some elbows to the back of the head before bending David’s leg around Finlay’s neck. David escapes by KICKING HIM IN THE FACE but it’s right back to the hold. Finlay drops a leg on David’s leg and cranks on it even more until the Young one spins out to escape.

Not that it matters as Fit grabs the leg again and we can hear some fans shouting boring. David escapes again and, say it with me, it’s right back to the hold. The round ends and they actually shake hands while going back to their corners. No clipping here so it’s straight to round five. They put their heads together and try to ram the other for a few moments until Finlay grabs a front facelock.

A hard whip across the ring has David in more trouble and Finlay puts him over his shoulder for a backbreaker submission hold. David won’t give up because he’s a good blue eye (British term for face) but Finlay clubs him down and pins him for the first fall. Apparently the sixth round automatically begins after the previous fall.

Finlay cranks on the arm but David falls on top of him in a slam attempt for two. Now it’s David slamming Fit down as the fans get into it a little bit. A cross body out of nowhere is good for a pin on Finlay to tie things up. Due to the fall we automatically start round seven and it’s Finlay tripping David down to the mat. David reverses to a chinlock before hitting his powerslam (impressive as he’s TINY here) for one.

Finlay goes right back to the armbar before David kicks him in the chest to escape. They slug it out and a quick suplex gets two for David. Back to the leg hold by Fit but David reverses into a body scissors. Finlay pushes off the mat but can’t break the hold, even as he’s standing on his feet. He finally flips David down and grabs a standing arm hold, only to be backdropped down for two. Finlay does the same thing to him and the round ends with Finlay throwing David down.

Last round now and both guys are clearly tired. Finlay cranks on the arm again before they slug it out with forearms from their knees. David grabs a headlock and cranks on it so much that Finlay can’t slam him for the break. A piledriver, the high spot of the match, gets two on Finlay but he comes right back with a suplex for the pin and the match.

Rating: C+. This is an entirely different kind of match and I would understand why most fans today would find this boring. That being said, it’s actually entertaining when you get down to the style here. You had two guys working on each other’s bodies for thirty seven minutes until any big move was going to beat the other. Well other than the piledriver but you get the idea. It’s not my style of wrestling but it’s definitely worth checking out if you’re interested in something that is as pure as you’re going to find.

Since he wouldn’t get to WCW for thirteen years and stuff from England is really hard to find, we’ll stop in New Japan for a tag match from April 30, 1992. You should know most of the people involved.

Eddie Guerrero/Negro Casas vs. Fit Finlay/Chris Benoit

Finlay and Casas get things going with Finlay cranking on a headlock before driving Casas down with an armbar. Casas changes it to a leg lock but Finlay quickly makes it to the ropes and takes it to the floor for a quick chop off. Back in and we hit the chinlock on Casas before it’s off to Benoit for a moderate pop. Casas rolls out of an armbar and we get the match that would be the backbone for several WCW shows for years to come.

Eddie charges right at Chris with a dropkick but it’s off to Finlay almost immediately. Casas comes back in as well and slugs it out with Finlay, which is a stupid idea no matter who you are. A few hard shots send Casas flying across the ring but he punches Finlay square in the jaw to get a breather. Eddie comes back in for a double team leg crank, only to miss an elbow drop.

Back to Benoit who drops Eddie with an enziguri but takes too long going up, allowing Eddie to score with a superplex. Eddie’s top rope splash (not the amphibious type yet) hits Benoit’s knees but he comes back with a victory roll for two. Finlay gets the tag and hits a hard shoulder to Eddie’s ribs in the corner and a Vader Bomb for two. Eddie easily makes the tag to Casas who takes Finlay to the floor and sends him into the barricade.

Finlay sends him into something much more painful: a Benoit clothesline. Back inside and it’s Benoit hammering on Casas but getting taken down by a headscissors to pop the crowd. Benoit reverses a crucifix attempt into a slam and hits the Swan Dive for two. Eddie and Casas get in some double teaming on Finlay before taking him to the floor to drop him onto the barricade.

Everything breaks down with Finlay and Benoit sending the opponents together, only to have them reverse into stereo dropkicks. Everyone but Eddie heads over the barricade so Eddie hits a HUGE springboard plancha to take them out. It’s Eddie vs. Benoit in the ring again with Guerrero reversing a tombstone but being reversed back into it for two.

Casas makes the save and launches Eddie into a dropkick on Benoit for two but Finlay makes the save. Everything breaks down again and Benoit accidentally baseball slides Finlay. Back in and Eddie’s springboard missile dropkick hits Casas, allowing Benoit to reverse an Eddie hurricanrana into a sunset flip for the pin.

Rating: C+. Not the best match in the world to start but the last four minutes or so were very exciting. Finlay didn’t look used to this style yet but he was still looking decent out there. Benoit vs. Eddie is a match that you can’t mess up no matter how hard you try and Casas was fine so the match worked quite well.

It was off to America and WCW for Finlay, who was immediately placed in a feud with fellow European tough guy William Regal. The two would meet in a match ahead of its time on August 29, 1996: a parking lot brawl.

Belfast Brawler vs. Steven Regal

This is joined in progress and is in the parking lot with a circle of cars around them. It’s a rematch from Uncensored and they fight over a cinder block. A bumper comes off a car and it goes into Regal’s stomach. Very stiff shots here. It’s so weird to see Regal being all young and flexible. Finlay gets choked by a seatbelt and Regal does as well.

I know this probably sounds commonplace by today’s standards but this was unheard of at the time. It helps that it’s a very stiff fight also and feels more like a street fight than a match called a street fight. Finlay goes through a windshield and the throw punches until Regal grabs a bumper. Tombstone (Finlay’s finisher) on the concrete doesn’t work so Regal tries a Piledriver of his own on the car. They’re on a wide shot here as Regal manages to get the Piledriver on the hood for the pin. Brain: “He’s out of gas!”

Rating: B. Like I said by today’s standards this isn’t a great match but for its time this was awesome stuff. They were pounding on each other out there and it made people want to watch WCW and find out what was going on here. Good stuff overall and a rather fun match which is still talked about today.

After a few months off TV, Finlay would come back and do very little. Eventually he would get a TV Title shot on May 9, 1998.

TV Title: Fit Finlay vs. Booker T

Fit takes him into the corner to start and hits a hard kick to the champion’s back. Finlay cranks on the leg as Tony is thrilled to have Nitro back to three hours next week. Booker fights up with a good looking spin kick to the face before backdropping Finlay to the floor. Back in and Finlay hits a hard clothesline, only to be taken down by a running forearm. The ax kick puts Finlay down and the whip spinebuster does the same. There’s a flapjack from the champion as Benoit saunters down to the ring. The distraction lets Finlay tombstone Booker down for the pin and the title.

Rating: D+. Nothing special here but it furthers the Booker vs. Benoit feud, which has already had developments since the last time we saw them. Over the last week, Booker and Benoit traded the TV Title at some house shows, but neither of Benoit’s two wins were acknowledged tonight. Instead we need Finlay to get the title. That’s not a knock on Finlay, but he hasn’t done anything of note in months and he gets a title?

Finlay would defend the title against random opponents for a month and a half before dropping it back to Booker T. The rest of the year wouldn’t go anywhere for Finlay and he would head into 1999 with nothing going on. Eventually WCW would start doing hardcore stuff and a tough guy like Finlay would be perfect for something like that. The first big hardcore match was a junkyard battle royal at Bash at the Beach 1999.

Junkyard Invitational

Ciclope, Jerry Flynn, Johnny Grunge, Hak, Horace Hogan, Brian Knobbs, Fit Finlay, Hugh Morrus, La Parka, Steven Regal, Rocco Rock, Silver King, David Taylor, Mikey Whipwreck

It should be noted that no one knew who was going to be in this match until it starts and it just starts with no intros or anything. And yes, they’re actually in a junkyard with almost no lighting. This must be THRILLING for the live audience too. Oh and Hak (Sandman) made the invitation. Now remember, we have no idea who is in this, you can’t see anything, and since they’re in a real junkyard it’s all over everywhere. We go to an aerial shot for no apparent reason.

Public Enemy, who are here for one night only, throw a car over off a pile of them. Jimmy is running around with his helmet. We have sparks. No idea how to call this because YOU CAN’T SEE ANYTHING. Ciclope (I think) dives off a car with a swanton that misses, sending him into another car. Steven Regal and Dave Taylor are here and no one can believe it. Seriously this looks like an action scene from a bad movie and since they’re in fighting clothes rather than ring gear, it’s almost impossible to tell who is who.

It’s very clear that most guys are just walking around and not really doing anything. Occasionally they’ll do something but it’s not very much at all. Morrus jumps off a car and misses an elbow to Finlay. Various weapons shots go around and La Parka has a tail pipe. Bobby: “I hit a guy from behind with a transmission once but never a tail pipe.” Some luchador dives off a car onto a bunch of people.

Horace throws Rocco through a windshield. Heenan goes into a used car salesman pitch which is kind of funny. La Parka has a chair. This is just boring anymore. Finlay hits people with various objects. No one has gone for the exit yet. Tony and Bobby suggest ways to escape. Morrus misses a charge at a car. Finlay gets all superheroish and blocks a shot with a garbage can as a shield.

Dave Taylor gets a tire put over him and is stuck on the ground. Rocco and Horace finally try to get out. Rock gets halfway over the gate but Horace makes the save. Finlay rams a bumper into someone’s chest. Taylor finally dances out of the tire. Hak gets smacked in the head with something and just keeps walking. He and Finlay go over by a Chevy and Finlay is put in it. Someone comes over with a forklift and picks up the Chevy. Finlay gets out of it and the car gets crushed, exploding for no apparent reason at all. Finlay kicks over a barrel of fire and climbs out as something else blows up.

Rating: N/A. This wasn’t wrestling. I don’t know what it was but it wasn’t wrestling. I’ve seen a lot of stupid stuff in my time, but this very well may have been the stupidest. I mean seriously, who in the world thought this was a good idea? This apparently cost over $100,000 to put on, no one in the audience would have been able to see the video of this (remember that they more or less had to sit around for fifteen minutes) and about four of them got hurt in the process and were out for a long time. So freaking idiotic. This company deserved to fail

Unfortunately Finlay would be injured later in the month at a house show, putting him out for most of the year. Again in 2000, Finlay would have nothing to do and would be done with the company in November. That was pretty much it for Finlay as an active wrestler for several years as he would spend most of 2001-2005 as a trainer, basically building the Divas division from the ground up. Eventually he would return to the ring in late 2005 and win the US Title shot on the July 14, 2006 episode of Smackdown. He would defend it against old rival William Regal at the 2006 Great American Bash.

US Title: Finlay vs. William Regal

 

Lashley was supposed to get the shot here but was sidelined by legitimate high liver enzymes. JBL goes on a hilarious rant before the match. “LIVER ENZYMES??? AS MUCH AS I’VE DRANK I’M LUCKY TO HAVE A LIVER!!! MY LIVER LOOKS LIKE JAKE ROBERTS’ AND MY LIVER ENZYMES HAVE NEVER BEEN HIGH!” I’m having issues having Cole as a neutral commentator. Regal is worried about Horny (not yet named) interfering. Regal goes a-leprechaun hunting and before the match starts.

 

Regal says he’ll just leave but Finlay tries to roll him up anyway. They lock up and go all the way to the floor without breaking it. They walk around and back up the steps and into the ring without breaking that lockup. Regal grabs a single leg and works the leg but that gets him nowhere. Regal throws him to the floor and here’s Horny! He pops Regal in the leg and JBL freaks out. “I want one for Christmas!”

 

Regal loses track of him and stands on the steps instead of, you know, GETTING IN THE RING. Horny sneaks up on him and Regal nearly jumps out of his skin. Back in Finlay gets a clothesline for two and it’s off to a nerve hold. This heel vs. heel thing is only kind of working so they’re going for comedy. JBL gives us a European soccer lesson as Finlay takes over. Regal gets in some kicks and a butterfly suplex for two.

 

Horny is back! He bites the fingers of Regal and Regal has to rake the eyes of the tiny leprechaun to escape. Back in and Finlay takes over, working on the hand. Regal gets in a shot to the leg to break the momentum. This is a highly technical match to go with the comedy which is an interesting mix. Regal hooks a chinlock but Finlay fights out with some shots to the ribs.

 

Back to the floor and you can hear them hitting each other incredibly hard. This was the same thing they did back at Uncensored 96, although this is a more entertaining match. Now Finlay hooks the chinlock. Regal throws him into the corner and they ram heads. In a great old school heel move, Regal drops to a knee, putting his leg on Finlay’s throat, while he talks to the referee. Exploder suplex puts Finlay down and there’s a knee drop for two.

 

The fans call this boring. I call them uncultured slobs. This is a European style match and it’s entertaining to see a different perspective. Regal runs off the apron and gets crotched on the apron skirt. Finlay hammers him back into the ring and takes Regal’s shoe off. It’s possible Horny stole it. Finlay misses a charge and hits the post. The fans are loudly booing now. Regal gets the Irish club that I can’t spell. Horny slips Finlay Regal’s boot though and a shot with that is enough for the pin to keep the title on Finlay.

 

Rating: C-. I’m going to be in the fairly extreme minority here but I enjoyed this. The technical aspect of it is really good but the comedy stuff is going to be very hit or miss. To be fair though, this was a hard one to work out as the styles really clashed. I was entertained by it though and that’s the point of this.

2006 would continue to be a good year for Finlay as he would get his only PPV main event in a four way for the Smackdown Title at No Mercy.

Smackdown World Title: Booker T vs. Lashley vs. Finlay vs. Batista

No tagging here. Cole talks about the numbers and JBL replies with this gem. JBL: “QUIT WITH THE MATH!!! I count money jackass!” Batista goes after Booker as Finlay throws Lashley to the floor. Finlay hooks up with Booker as Cole keeps talking about percentages. Lashley back in now and he throws Finlay to the floor. Batista is down in the corner. Spinebuster gets two on Booker.

 

Finlay pulls Lashley to the floor and a double teaming begins. Back in and the double team is on Batista until Finlay double crossed Booker. JBL freaking out is great but Cole is just awful at giving him stuff to play off. We’re down to Finlay vs. Booker with the pale one taking over. Lashley tries to get in but Finlay casually knocks him away. Booker is knocked to the floor so Finlay works on Big Dave’s arm.

 

Batista hits a Samoan Drop but Finlay hangs on. Cool. Lashley comes in but Finlay takes him down too. Cole calls Finlay Lashley because they look so much alike. Half crab to Lashley but Booker superkicks Finlay down for two. Booker takes Batista down with another sweet kick for two. Big Dave sideslams him down for two. Their one on one match is over as Lashley clotheslines Booker to the floor.

 

Finlay brings in a chair but Lashley kicks it away. Horny comes in to low blow Lashley and the club to the head gets two for Finlay as Booker saves. Everyone gets in for a bit and Batista hits a Jackhammer to take Finlay out so it’s face vs. face. Batista is like screw fighting and spears him down for two. Lashley comes back and somewhere (even Cole isn’t sure where) Batista gets his head busted open.

 

Batista gets thrown to the floor as does Finlay but Booker comes in with a Bookend for two. Just the two of them in the ring now and Bobby counters a suplex for two. Booker doesn’t know what to do here so he takes his hair down. Finlay breaks up the ax kick and gets two. Batista hits spinebusters on everyone and a Batista Bomb to Finlay. Lashley spears him for no apparent reason, allowing Booker to steal the pin on Finlay.

 

Rating: B-. Not bad here at all with the formula working pretty well. I like the four man matches much better than three man as you get more combinations out of it. Booker winning was obvious but it was still good enough at times. Finlay was really impressive here as he ran most of the match, which is what he’s great for.

A few months later, Finlay would be entered into his biggest storyline ever. Vince McMahon was revealed to have an illegitimate son in the form of Hornswoggle, but this would eventually be retconned to Finlay really being the father but having Vince hide the fact for reasons that were never quite explained. JBL attacked Horny, setting up a Belfast Brawl at Wrestlemania XXIV.

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Finlay

This is a Belfast Brawl which means street fight. Finlay was revealed to be Hornswoggle’s dad and JBL beat up the tiny man as a favor to Vince. Tonight it’s about revenge. Horny comes out with Finlay to appeal to the kids. Finlay charges at the ring and gets drilled by a knee to the head. JBL pounds away on the floor but gets sent shoulder first into the steps. We head inside for the opening bell and Finlay slides right back out to find some trashcans.

As he gets back in though JBL CRACKS him with a can and picks up some cookie sheets. Now the steps are brought in but JBL can’t powerbomb Finlay onto them. Some cookie sheet shots to the head put JBL down for two but a big boot does the same to Finlay. JBL stops to yell at Horny, allowing for the shot with that Irish club that I can’t spell. Since this is a WWE hardcore style match, it’s table time.

The table is set up in the corner but Finlay picks up the steps instead. JBL bails to the floor and beats on Horny, only to be rammed into the announce table by Papa Horny for his efforts. A trashcan lid to the head stops Finlay and gets two back inside, allowing JBL to pick up a trashcan and LAUNCH IT at Horny. That looked great.

Speaking of trashcans, a shot to JBL breaks up the Clothesline and Finlay blasts him with a lid for good measure. JBL is sent through the table for two and the fans are pleased. Finlay picks up the steps but gets blasted in the knee by a kendo stick, allowing JBL to knock him out with the Clothesline for the pin.

Rating: C+. This was fine. The whole point of this was to have a power brawl with some basic weapons which is what we got. I’m really not sure on JBL winning as the fans were solidly behind Horny and Finlay, but at least the match was entertaining and there were some hard shots in there. Good stuff here.

The partnership with Hornswoggle would continue in an actual team at Night of Champions 2008 where the pair actually received a Tag Title match.

Smackdown Tag Titles: John Morrison/Miz vs. Finlay/Hornswoggle

Please make it short. They already did that didn’t they? Do I need to explain to you why this is a dumb match? And the fans pop for the challengers because that’s what Satan told them to do. The tall guy and the Monday Night Delight start us off. Ross and Foley are a weird pairing on commentary. Horny is listed at 4’4. Why did Vince wonder why we didn’t like the company in 08?

We do get a spot that I haven’t seen before as Morrison jumps over the rope and gets crotched on the ring skirt. I’ve never seen that before. Finlay starts throwing Horny into Miz and Morrison as a projectile. This is a comedy match that forgot the comedy. How weird is it to think that two years later Miz could be a potential MITB winner? I wouldn’t be surprised if he won it. Miz and Morrison were really starting to get good here but wouldn’t hit their stride for a few more months.

Horny comes in and beats up Miz, hitting a Stunner and a bulldog. None of these do anything of course since HE IS TINY. The problem becomes clear here very soon: the heels have to either beat up Horny or have him get the hot tag. Finlay beats up everyone after such a tag and the fans care for some reason. Horny goes up for the splash and Morrison finally realizes how stupid this is and more or less chokeslams him to the mat, ending this annoyance.

Rating: D. I mean seriously, it’s a freaking midget and an old man against a good and young team. Was this really the best option they had? They wanted this to make this a serious match and it just completely failed. It was a hybrid comedy match and mess and just didn’t work. They wanted Horny to be something serious and it just didn’t work so of course they kept going with it forever.

It would soon be off to ECW where Finlay would be one of the old guys putting over the youngn’s, including in a Championship Scramble at the Bash in June 2009.

ECW Title: Christian vs. Tommy Dreamer vs. Jack Swagger vs. Mark Henry vs. Finlay

This is a Scramble match which is more or less a gauntlet. Every three minutes someone else comes in and whoever gets the final pin is champion but you have to pin the champion for the pin to count. Uh…sure. Christian and Swagger start us off. Wow it’s weird to see Swagger as champion before Christian. I miss the pushups.

Ok so if Swagger pins Christian he’s IT more or less? I guess that makes sense. I’m assuming that there will be a clock once everyone comes in. Striker implies a heel turn for Christian but nothing ever came for that. The clock begins far before three minutes is up and it’s Finlay. Striker talks about Irishmen from centuries ago as no one cares at all. Swagger pokes Finlay in the eye and rolls him up to become IT.

Christian and Swagger do a nice little sequence that gets two for the Canadian. He beats Christian down as Dreamer is number four. Dreamer beats up everyone with incredibly basic stuff but throws out a Sky High. Ok apparently it’s not Swagger that has to lose the title as it’s just the last pin. Uh…that kind of makes sense I suppose.

They blow a spot where Christian is on the mat and Dreamer gets thrown onto him. It just looked really awkward. Finlay finally comes back to life and hits the Celtic Cross on Swagger to become IT. Finlay and Dreamer don’t work well together to put it mildly. And here’s Henry to suck the life out of the match. Ok so now we have five minutes left and whoever gets the last fall is champion. Got it.

Dreamer takes the World’s Worst Finisher with 4:15 to make Henry IT. Everyone not named Dreamer beats Henry up and the people start booing for some reason. Finlay hits a freaking suicide dive onto Swagger. Have to love old men flying all over the place. Henry teases a top rope dive but for the sake of the gravitational pull, Swagger saves him and gets the pin to become it with about 2:20 to go.

I like knowing how much longer to go at times and this is one of them. Christian hits the Killswitch on Swagger but Dreamer DDTs him at 1:20 to become IT. It becomes a big mess now which makes sense at least. On instinct Dreamer goes for a cover which they don’t point out the stupidity of. Everyone goes for covers but the clock runs out and Dreamer retains. He screams “I WON???” in a funny moment.

Rating: C+. These matches are hard to call but I liked it. Thankfully they haven’t killed them by having them every two weeks or something like that. This still feels fresh though and it comes off as a good way to be different. Also it makes Dreamer look like a competent champion and not a jobber which I can’t complain about. This worked but was still a little bit weird.

We’ll wrap it up with a win from Smackdown on January 22, 2010.

Finlay vs. Batista

Batista, the heel here shoves him into the corner to start but Finlay comes out with some hard right hands before raising a boot to stop Big Dave. Finlay slugs him down and hits the rolling fireman’s carry followed by a running seated senton. They head outside with Batista gouging at the eyes and throwing Finlay over the announce table for the very fast DQ.

Finlay is a guy that was never a focus of an American company but he could work a very physical style and make anyone look interesting. His British and European stuff certainly isn’t for everyone but it’s a very different style and interesting if you can get into the style. Finlay in America was a very tough guy who worked an entertaining style and that’s all a veteran like him was supposed to be. He’s an underrated talent who really has been all around the world.

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It’s another one of those days where I have to stretch because otherwise I’ll be watching Bob Holly matches for three hours. Today it’s Eddie Guerrero, who put on a mask and won the Royal Rumble in 2006 as Rey Mysterio.

Our first match is from Eddie’s days as a jobber, facing none other than Terry Funk on WCW TV, sometime between May and July of 1989.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Terry Funk

The fans chant for Flair who was recently injured by Funk. Terry shoves him around to start but Eddie rolls around to evade. An enziguri sends Funk to the floor but he comes back in, only to have Eddie moonsault over him ala Daniel Bryan. Funk isn’t wanting to play today though and puts Eddie in a giant swing to take over. Eddie hits a dropkick but misses a second and is thrown to the floor which isn’t a DQ for reasons JR doesn’t understand. Eddie avoids a clothesline and hits a nice plancha to take Terry out. Again the second doesn’t hit though (sequels are never as good) and Terry piledrives him on the floor and gets the pin.

Rating: C. Fun match here, especially for a squash. Allegedly Terry brought Eddie into the company and this was his attempt to give Eddie a rub, which would have worked if WCW hadn’t been so stupid at times. Eddie looked great despite being a glorified rookie at this point. Funk was on fire in 1989 with his first of many career resurgences.

Eddie got his big start in Mexico but also performed as Black Tiger in NJPW so we’ll look at his first round match in the Super J Cup 1994 against Taka Michinoku.

Super J Cup First Round: Taka Michinoku vs. Black Tiger

Taka looks very young here and is of course more famous for his WWF run. Black Tiger is Eddie Guerrero under a mask and WAY before he was famous in the US. The winner of this gets Wild Pegasus, more famous as Chris Benoit. Eddie is heel here and takes Taka down fast, hitting the slingshot hilo and a BIG powerbomb for two. Neckbreaker gets two for Eddie and it’s off to an abdominal stretch.

Eddie chops him down and puts on a Sharpshooter, which the announcers call a Scorpion. That’s quickly broken and they collide as this is almost too fast to call. Taka tries a clothesline but it only staggers Eddie, but Eddie’s takes Taka’s head off. Taka headscissors Eddie to the floor and moonsaults off the top back into the ring (Taka is alone in the ring and wasn’t going after Eddie) to pop the crowd.

Back in and Taka moonsaults moonsaults over Eddie so he can suplex him down. Eddie goes to the floor and Taka hits a HUGE dive to take both guys out. Back in again and Michinoku hits a German for two as well as a rana for the same. Another rana attempt is countered into another BIG powerbomb for two. Eddie hits a top rope splash (not the amphibian kind) for two. Taka powerbombs Guerrero down for two and hits a moonsault for the same. Another moonsault hits knees so Eddie hits his brainbuster for two. Eddie is all ticked off now so he KILLS Taka with a tornado DDT for the pin.

Rating: B. This was a very fun and fast paced match. Even though it was just a spotfest, sometimes there’s nothing wrong with that at all and it worked very well here. Eddie was on fire at this point and he would go to AAA soon where he would become a breakout star before heading to ECW and then WCW. Speaking of WCW, the music he left to sounded a lot like what would become the Nitro theme but it was too close to tell.

Guerrero was also a big deal in Mexico of course, being part of a BIG heel group called Los Gringos Locos. One of the most famous matches in lucha libre history was at the AAA/WCW When Worlds Collide show with Eddie teaming with his partner Art Barr to face Octagon and El Hijo Del Santo.

Los Gringos Locos vs. Octagon/El Hijo Del Santo

Oh here it is. THIS is the reason this show is famous and it’s one of the best matches of the 90s according to almost every reviewer. There is all kinds of backstory here. First of all: Los Gringos Locos are Eddie Guerrero and Love Machine Art Barr (just called Love Machine) and they are HATED. Barr makes swimming motions at the crowd as they come in, which is about as racist as you can get.

Both of them (plus their lackey Louis Spicolli) are in clothes so American flagged themed that Jack Swagger and Kurt Angle and the Patriot would tell them to tone it down. There are others in the stable with them including non-Americans like Konnan but you get the idea. The story here is that Eddie was in a team with El Hijo Del Santo but turned on him. This was due to their fathers being a big team (Gory Guerrero and El Santo, El Santo being the undisputed biggest name ever in Mexican wrestling) and Gory being overshaddowed. The idea was Eddie wouldn’t let it happen so he beat up El Hijo to take fame for himself.

On top of that, Los Gringos beat Octagon/El Hijo Del Santo for the AAA tag titles in Chicago a few months before this with the help of a fast count from a paid off referee. This is a mask vs. hair match though, which is the mother of all gimmick matches in Mexico and it’s also 2/3 falls. However since this is Mexico, for a fall to count, both members of a team have to be defeated. I’ll try to keep track of that as we go.

Got all that? Good.

Eddie vs. Santo (his name is El Hijo Del Santo and Santo is a different wrestler, but for the sake of not having to type that every time I’ll be calling him Santo. I’m aware of the difference) starts us off and the fans couldn’t be more behind the masked team. There’s only one referee in here and if you go to the floor it doesn’t mean the other guy can come in so it’s a more traditional tag match.

Off to Barr and Octagon but Eddie cheats like only he can. They set for a Doomsday Rana but Eddie botches slightly, basically dropping Santo on his head. Since he’s practically dead, that’s good for the first pin. Remember that doesn’t count as a fall though, but rather just half a fall. A superplex by Eddie and a frog splash by Barr (he invented it, Eddie copied it) ends Octagon so we’re at 1-0 Gringos very early.

Barr does the swimming thing again during the break between falls. Eddie starts with Santo again and Santo is in trouble. Off to Octagon and he’s an idiot apparently as Eddie begs off and Octagon lets him have a break. Off to Barr who likes to do jumping jacks. Eddie comes back in via a slingshot hilo and Santo is like screw this and pounds on Eddie a bit. Barr takes a senton backsplash and everything breaks down.

Out to the floor and the Mexicans dive onto Los Gringos in a huge crash. Back to Eddie vs. Santo in the ring which is what the original match was going to be. Eddie snaps off a rana off the top and gets a quick pin on Santo but we’re not done yet. Santo can’t interfere here either. The Gringos double team Octagon but he escapes, hooking a rana on Eddie for a quick pin and then a freaky looking neck lock on Barr for the tap and a POP.

Now we get down to the real stuff as those first ten minutes were just a warmup. Back to Eddie vs. Santo to get us started as Barr chants for Proposition 187, which would be a very tough anti-immigration law up for a vote in California. See why he’s so hated? Santo hooks a camel clutch but Barr superkicks him in the head to take over. Octagon comes in to break up a submission hold but stops to kick Barr a little while he’s in there.

Octagon kicks away even more but Eddie saves and tries the Gory Stretch. Eddie goes up but gets caught in an electric chair drop for two. Now Los Gringos try the double suicide dives but Eddie’s foot gets caught on the middle rope so he lands on his head. They head back to the ring where Eddie gets powerbombed to the floor. Barr tombstones Octagon (HUGE thing as that move paralyzed a guy shortly before this) and gets the pin to put them a fall away from winning. The crowd is reaching ONS 06 levels of hate now.

Eddie grabs a German on Santo for two and there’s the PowerPlex again but it only gets two here, drawing an ERUPTION from the crowd. Octagon is being stretchered out and it’s heel miscommunication time. Santo dives onto Eddie and Blue Panther (Santo/Octagon’s second) piledrives Barr to make it 1-1. So in essence it’s Guerrero vs. Santo now and Eddie hits a Batista Bomb for two. A belly to belly superplex gets two for Eddie as does a rana off the top. Dragon suplex gets two as Barr is waking up again. Santo grabs a rollup out of nowhere and keeps the masks as he gets the pin.

Rating: A-. I don’t know if it’s the lack of context but I didn’t see this as being the perfect match that it’s built up as. Then again I almost always rate tag matches lower than most people do so that probably has something to do with it. That being said though the crowd was electric for this and the whole thing worked very well. Great match and worth seeing for history if nothing else.

Octagon is taken into an ambulance. Barr cuts Eddie’s hair and cries over having to do it. Barr gets his cut now and looks like he’s about to cry.

Barr would be dead in 17 days. He had a ton of potential too.

 

Octagon is taken into an ambulance. Barr cuts Eddie’s hair and cries over having to do it. Barr gets his cut now and looks like he’s about to cry.

America came calling in the form of ECW where Eddie would get his biggest exposure yet in a feud over the TV Title with Dean Malenko. Here’s one of those title matches with Dean defending at an outdoors show on August 3, 1995.

TV Title: Eddie Guerrero vs. Dean Malenko

Dean is defending. Feeling out process to start with both guys fighting over a wristlock. You know this is going to be technically heavy. Both guys try to drop to the mat and we get a standoff. A headlock takes Dean to the mat as Joey talks about Chavo Jr. making his debut in Los Angeles. Eddie lands on his feet to counter a monkey flip and he takes Dean down with a nice headscissors. A hiptoss and armdrag put Dean down and they trade headscissors to give Eddie control again.

There’s the hilo from Guerrero for two as Joey compares this to Flair, Gagne and Thesz. Not exactly but Joey didn’t always make sense. An abdominal stretch has Dean in trouble but he fights out of it and grabs a belly to back suplex. There’s a brainbuster for good measure but Guerrero is up at two. Malenko’s gutbuster (not the awesome middle rope variety) has Eddie in even more trouble and having his tornado DDT countered doesn’t help.

A nice tiger bomb gets two for the champion but he gets caught in a quick victory roll for two. Eddie puts him down and hits the frog splash out of nowhere but his ribs are too hurt to cover. Dean is smart enough to lock on an abdominal stretch but Eddie is quickly in the ropes. Malenko tries a rollup but Eddie reverses into one of his own for two, only to be caught in a sunset flip which he reverses as well into a pin on Dean for the title out of nowhere.

Rating: B-. The out of nowhere part is right as this felt like they were completely out of time and had to go to the finish. I’m not a fan of that kind of an ending at all as it takes away from all the rib work and build they had going on. It’s a good match but their Hostile City Showdown 2/3 falls match is better.

Eddie would be brought into WCW in late 1995 as a guy in tights who was good in the ring and little more. Eventually the company decided they wanted to push Diamond Dallas Page and put him with Eddie, thinking Page would get much better working with him on a regular basis. The idea worked (kind of) and here’s a good example of it in the finals of a tournament for the US Title at Starrcade 1996.

US Title Tournament Final: Eddie Guerrero vs. Diamond Dallas Page

 

Ric Flair had been champion but had to vacate the title due to a shoulder injury. The idea of this feud (they had fought over the summer too) was to have Page get better by working with a guy as talented as Guerrero. This is after Page lost his $6 to the Diamond Doll (now named Kimberly) and the TV Title due to a bingo card that she won $13 million on which he bought for her. This era of WCW was weird if I didn’t mention that already.

 

The title is vacant coming in if that wasn’t clear, although the belt isn’t here. It was stolen by the Giant who claimed that he was champion because he wanted to be, so this is for just the name at this point. Feeling out process to start until Eddie takes him into the corner for some chops. Instead of following up Eddie backs off though and lets Page fire off some right hands. A dropkick puts Page on the floor and Eddie rams him into the barricade for good measure.

 

Like a good heel, Page goes to the eyes to take over and sends Eddie into the steps. Back in and Eddie takes him down with a drop toehold and into an armbar. Eddie stays on the arm with a wristlock as Tony implies that he was scalping tickets before the show. Page takes him down by the hair a few times but Eddie nips right back up. Guerrero low bridges Page to the floor and hits a good looking dive to take him down again. Back in and Eddie is dropped chin first on the top turnbuckle and Page takes over for the first time.

 

A Pancake (piledriver position but dropping forward instead of down) puts Guerrero down again and it’s off to a chinlock. A suplex gets two on Eddie and Page yells at the referee a bit. Off to an abdominal stretch by Page and he grabs the ropes for extra leverage. Eddie escapes, only to get caught in a swinging neckbreaker for two. Back to the abdominal stretch but Page finally gets caught and has his hold broken by the referee.

 

Eddie gets another two count off a small package but Page takes his head off with a discus lariat for no cover. Page misses a charge and goes shoulder first into the post, allowing Eddie to take him down with a leg trip. Eddie pounds away and hits a solid European uppercut before ramming Page into the buckle. A suplex gets two on DDP but Eddie’s frog splash (mostly) misses.

 

Page gets two of his own off a belly to belly suplex, only to go up and get crotched down by Guerrero. Eddie is shoved off the top but Page dives into an atomic drop for two. A pair of backslides gets two each for Eddie but Page’s helicopter bomb gets the same. Eddie is sent to the floor, allowing the NWO to come in and lay out DDP. Guerrero didn’t see a thing so he hits the frog splash for the pin and no belt.

 

Rating: C+. This took awhile to get going but it was clear that Page wasn’t ready to be a heel at this level yet. Thankfully he turned face soon after this and became the hottest thing in the company as he fought the NWO. Eddie would slip down to the cruiserweight division and dominate there for awhile, meaning that better days were ahead for both guys.

Next up is Halloween Havoc 1997. That should be all you need to know.

Cruiserweight Title: Eddie Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio

This is mask vs. title with Eddie as champion of course. Great heat on Eddie to start as he’s totally evil here. Rey gets an arm drag and a cross body to send him to the floor almost immediately. Rey flips to the apron but gets caught by Eddie and tripped, sending him to the floor. Eddie rams Rey into the steps and adds a hilo to the back in the ring. Rey fires off a dropkick but tries a cartwheel which gets caught in a belly to back as Eddie continues his dominance.

Tilt-a-whirl backbreaker by Eddie gets two. Eddie goes after the mask but this is part of a bodysuit kind of a thing. Abdominal stretch by Eddie and Rey is in trouble. Tenay says that Rey used to wrestle as Hummingbird which Heenan of course rips into. Rey is on his back in a test of strength position so he uses Eddie as a board to pop up with and jumps to the top rope, backflips over and grabs a DDT out of nowhere to break Eddie’s momentum. AWESOME move.

Rey sends Eddie to the apron and tries a dropkick but Eddie moves and sends Rey to the floor. After sending him into the railing it’s a camel clutch with Eddie ripping at the mask again. Off to the Gory Special and Rey is in trouble. Modified surfboard as Eddie is in total control here. We hear about El Santo which is someone you hardly ever hear about at all.

Rey tries to fire some shots off in the corner but gets sent into the opposite corner and caught in the Tree of Woe. Baseball slide by Eddie misses and he does the Hennig crotch spot against the post. Rey dives off the top onto Eddie on the floor and here comes Rey. Standing rana gets two back in the ring. A headscissors puts Eddie on the floor and in perhaps the most awesome spot I’ve ever seen, Rey gets a running start and dives over the ropes, catches Eddie in a rana and swings him around without touching the floor until he releases the hold.

Back in and a corkscrew moonsault gets two. Split legged moonsault misses and it’s a big powerbomb by Eddie and Rey is in trouble. Crowd is getting into this quickly. Big heat on Eddie now. Rey takes him down with a spinwheel kick but the West Coast Pop is reversed into a backbreaker. Frog Splash misses so Rey goes up top. Eddie tries a crucifix bomb off the top but Rey reverses into a rana out of air and holds Eddie down to get the pin and the title! AWESOME ending!

Rating: A+. This was in the running for match of the year and it’s easy to see why. The problem is when you have Austin vs. Hart in the I Quit match and the original Hell in a Cell in the same year. That kind of slows things down a bit which is a shame as this was a great match indeed. Rey was awesome at this point and moved around here so well that it was almost uncanny. Great match and Eddie played an awesome cocky heel here. Great match and the best I’ve ever seen out of Eddie I think.

 

Eddie’s next major feud was with his nephew Chavo who was forced to work with his uncle after losing to him in a match. Chavo eventually snapped and caused Eddie some problems, like this one from the June 29, 1998 Monday Nitro.

Little Dragon vs. Eddie Guerrero

Dragon is another guy from Dragon Gate who is better known as Dragon Kid. This is his only WCW appearance, meaning the fans aren’t exactly thrilled with him. Eddie quickly takes him down by the arm but Dragon flips out and hits a handspring elbow in the corner. A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker puts Dragon down again and Eddie hits the slingshot hilo to his back.

The fans chant for Chavo so Eddie hits a brainbuster. He looks all over the place for Chavo before going up for the frog splash. Here’s Chavo riding a hobby horse named Pepe and telling Eddie (“Little Trooper”) to keep going. Eddie tries to steal the horse and the distraction lets Dragon roll Eddie up for the pin.

Rating: D+. The match wasn’t bad but was more for the story than the match itself. Chavo is completely insane by this point and the character is getting over as a result. Imagine that: a veteran doing a story with a younger guy and the younger guy getting over. Also notice that Eddie hasn’t lost any of his heat at all and is getting better reactions from the crowd. Why is this such a hard concept to grasp?

Around this time Eddie would want out of his contract with WCW due to not being pushed and would be put in charge of the Latino World Order as a way to calm him down. Unfortunately Eddie was in a bad car wreck on January 1, 1999 and would be out of action for six months, ending the story. Once back he would join the Filthy Animals who would fight some clowns at Fall Brawl 1999. There’s no sarcasm in that at all.

 Eddie Guerrero/Rey Mysterio/Billy Kidman vs. Insane Clown Posse/Vampiro

Oh look: it’s the clowns. For some reason these guys kept getting put on major shows and told they were pro wrestlers so they pretend they are and waste a lot of time. The other team is the Filthy Animals apparently. Rey is unmasked with blonde hair here because that money from his mask sales was just not needed here. LONG stall to start because they’re freaking clowns.

Vampy doesn’t have his face painted which is a very weird look for him. They chill on the floor so we don’t have any of that wrestling stuff. White hot crowd. Ok so it’s Kidman against Shaggy 2 Dope. I hate this already. Kidman lets Shaggy get a shot in to start and Kidman is walking him through everything. A reverse Veg-O-Matic hits Shaggy and it’s off to Eddie.

Off to Rey vs. Violent Jay. He’s the bigger one and the blonde guy so it’s easy to tell them apart. Bronco Buster hits Vampiro and it’s off to Kidman. Since having Vampiro would be the best idea for his team, here’s Jay again. And yes I know it’ssupposed to just be the letter J but screw these idiots. DDT to Kidman and it’s off to Vampiro again. He hits a spinwheel kick off the top for two on Kidman.

The heels double team Kidman as Tony says his hair used to be like Vampiro’s. Vampy chops away and it’s off to Shaggy. You can tell very quickly that the clowns have very limited skill and training. They look like the Tough Enough guys going through spots. Rey’s knee is hurt and if I remember right this is legit.

Vampiro works over Rey for a bit more until it’s off to Eddie. Let the chopping begin! Vampy gets a nice spin kick to take Eddie down as it’s back to the clowns. Shaggy TOTALLY misses a top rope legdrop but gets two anyway. Eddie cleans house but Shaggy and Vampiro hit the absolute worst 3D you will ever see.

Shaggy was doing Bubba’s part and drops Eddie about two feet above the mat, more or less making it a very modified Samoan Drop by Vampiro. GET THESE GUYS OUT OF THE FREAKING RING BEFORE THEY KILL SOMEONE. Everything breaks down and it’s 3-2 due to Rey’s knee injury. The Shooting Star ends Vampiro finally.

Rating: D+. This is one of those matches where you have to praise one set of guys for the good stuff and blame the rest on the others. Point blank: the clowns don’t belong in the ring. They’re not good, they’re not interesting, they’re not wrestlers and they have zero business being out there. That being said, naturally they got time on all four major companies’ shows because someone hates me.

Soon after this it was off to the WWF where Eddie would injure his arm in his first match with the company, putting him out of action for a few weeks. He would win the European Title from Chris Jericho the night after Wrestlemania 2000 and here’s the rematch from a week later.

European Title: Chris Jericho vs. Eddie Guerrero

Eddie is defending in a rematch from last week where Chyna joined Eddie to cost Jericho the title. Jericho says he’s happy with the new couple but he isn’t sure which of them is the man and which of them has the bigger package. Jericho hits a fast backbreaker to start and the champ runs, hiding behind the referee. Eddie might have dropkicked Jericho low and takes over. Jerry makes some very dated Elian Gonzalez jokes, which apparently were old even then.

Eddie works on the knee and hooks a Figure Four, putting it on the correct leg and thereby making him more proficient at the hold than Flair himself is. Jericho makes the rope and doesn’t seem all that interested in selling the knee. Eddie charges into a boot in the corner and gets backdropped down as Jericho makes his comeback. Jericho loads up the Walls but Chyna’s distraction lets Eddie rolls Jericho up for two. Chyna throws Eddie the belt but before Eddie can hit Jericho, Eddie is knocked into the referee. Jericho hits the Lionsault but Chyna takes out Jericho with a DDT, letting Eddie get the pin to retain, just like last week.

Rating: C-. For a Jericho vs. Guerrero match, I was expecting a lot better performance here. This was almost the same match as last week which doesn’t exactly make me care about the feud that much. Chyna and Eddie went on to have a pretty big run together which was pretty entertaining at the same time. Not a great match here and Jericho’s non-selling was annoying.

Eddie wouldn’t do much for the next year other than deal with Chyna and go after the Intercontinental Title. Therefore, here’s a random six man tag from Raw on April 23, 2001.

Raven/Steve Blackman/Grandmaster Sexay vs. Dean Malenko/Eddie Guerrero/Perry Saturn

 

Raven had Saturn beaten on Heat but Eddie made the save, setting up this match. Raven faces Eddie on Sunday for the European Title. The non-Radicalz get separate entrances to waste some time. We have three matches left and about 25 minutes of time left. Saturn jumps Blackman as he gets in the ring. They have a martial arts contest which is fast paced.

 

Off to Dean and Grandmaster who dances a lot. Saturn hammers on him a bit but Grandmaster hits a crossbody off the top to bring in Raven. Raven tries to get to Eddie but gets Saturn instead. There’s the corner clothesline into the bulldog which Punk uses now. Everything breaks down and Eddie grabs La Majistral for the pin on Raven. Way to make me think Raven can get the pin on Sunday.

 

Rating: D+. This was just a basic six man tag and I have no idea what the point in the ending was. Raven needed to get a fluke win out there to set up the title match but now the drama is gone. In a really weird booking move the match wouldn’t take place though as Matt Hardy would win the title on Thursday and defend it against Christian and Eddie in a triple threat. Raven fought Rhyno for the Hardcore Title instead, and to WWF’s credit that’s considered one of if not the best traditional hardcore matches ever. I guess they did know what they were doing.

Soon after this Eddie would get in trouble for drugs and then get released for drunk driving. After about six months in Japan and on the indy circuit (mainly World Wrestling All-Stars and the fledgling ROH), he would come back and quickly win the Intercontinental Title from Rob Van Dam. After losing the title back to RVD, Eddie would go through the motions until hooking back up with his nephew Chavo to go after the newly created Smackdown Tag Titles, including this three way tag match at Survivor Series 2002.

Smackdown Tag Titles: Edge/Rey Mysterio vs. Kurt Angle/Chris Benoit vs. Los Guerreros

Edge and Mysterio are champions and this is under elimination rules. It’s Mysterio vs. Benoit to start which is fine with me. Benoit hits a HARD chop but gets caught in a rana and a flapjack to give Rey what will likely be a short lived advantage. Off to Edge for a double hiptoss before Kurt gets the tag and a big pop. Chavo punches Angle in the back of the head and that’s a tag apparently.

Chavo gets shouldered down but nips up immediately. Off to Mysterio vs. Eddie which is one of those pairings that works no matter what. A headscissors takes Eddie down and it’s off to Kurt to face the masked dude. They’re going very fast paced so far. Angle misses a charge into the post but Rey takes too much time on the top and gets run over by Kurt. The Olympian tags in the psycho who suplexes Rey down for two.

Back to Angle who suplexes Rey down and gets in a cheap shot on Edge. The Angle Slam is countered but Angle clotheslines Rey down instead. Back to Chris as Tazz talks about Los Guerreros not wanting to get in yet. The battling partners tag in again so Angle can put on a front facelock. Rey fights up after about a minute in the hold and kicks Kurt in the face to take him down.

There’s the hot tag to Edge who cleans house with a bunch of suplexes. Eddie comes in and goes to the floor with Rey. Edge misses the spear and gets caught in a Crossface and ankle lock AT THE SAME TIME. Mysterio breaks both parts of the hold up and Chavo pulls Angle to the floor. Rey dives on both of them and Benoit Germans Edge but Eddie comes in off the top to sunset flip Benoit, sending Edge flying in a German for two each. Eddie gets suplexed to the floor with his head smashing into the apron on the way down. FREAKING OW MAN!

Benoit rolls more Germans on Edge (Gee I wonder why he needed neck surgery five months after this) and Eddie hits the Frog Splash on Edge but Benoit hits the Swan Dive on Eddie. Angle Slam and Ankle lock to Eddie while Benoit Crossfaces Edge. Chavo hits Benoit with a belt and throws the belt to Angle. Benoit thinks Angle hit him and Mysterio dropkicks Chris into Angle. Angle and Rey go to the floor and Edge spears Benoit for the elimination. Absolutely amazing sequence there which NEVER STOPPED.

Angle and Benoit destroy Edge and Rey before leaving. They lay out Los Guerreros too for fun. Eddie vs. Edge keeps the match going and Eddie suplexes the Canadian down before it’s off to Chavo. Chavo pounds away on Edge as Los Guerreros double team. We get down to a much more standard tag team formula with Edge playing Ricky Morton. Edge finally comes back with a double clothesline and it’s off to Rey.

Things speed up again with Rey flying all over the place and hitting a headscissors to put Chavo down. Edge spears both guys down and launches Rey up to rana Eddie off the top. That’s another awesome sequence. There’s the 619 to Eddie but Chavo hits Rey in the back to break up the West Coast Pop. Eddie puts on the Lasso From El Paso (a Boston Crab/Sharpshooter hybrid) for the tap and the titles.

Rating: B+. This was a match that felt like it got hacked to death. If you give these guys another 15 minutes (the match ran 20) and take away the belt shots, the match gets a lot better. The first half, as in before the first elimination, is INCREDIBLE. The stuff after that though is good but standard. Still though, these guys were the future of the company and it was a good sign to see them. Combine that with three guys named Batista, Orton and Cena that had debuted earlier in the year and you’ve got the next five years of WWE.

After a long stretch of time in the tag division, it was time for Eddie to get the one thing he had never held before: the world title. He won a battle royal on Smackdown and got his shot against the monster Brock Lesnar at No Way Out 2004.

Smackdown World Title: Eddie Guerrero vs. Brock Lesnar

Brock comes out first here for some reason. Soon after this the music would change from We Lie, We Cheat, We Steal to I Lie, I Cheat, I Steal which was good I though. Fans are TOTALLY behind Eddie here which is no surprise. We have about 40 minutes left in the tape so this is getting A LOT of time. Eddie can’t do anything to start so like an idiot he keeps charging.

All Brock to start here. A rana is blocked into a powerbomb and then Brock just tosses him away as Eddie’s selling is awesome. Brock gets a big running high knee in the corner. If he had done that to Velasquez he might have the belt still. Eddie gets knocked to the floor and has had NOTHING so far. He finally gets something going as he gets Lesnar’s leg around the post and gets him down, opening a door for him.

So much for that as Brock gets a modified Fisherman’s suplex into a kind of slam for two. Jawbreaker gets him out of a rear naked choke. So I guess Eddie is better than Shane Carwin as he can escape a Lesnar choke. Eddie gets a dropkick and then gets his head taken off by a clothesline. Semi-botched German has Eddie on the brink here. Not really but I like how that sounds.

Brock goes for another knee in the corner but crashes to the floor. Eddie adds a plancha and both guys are a bit weakened now. Brock hits a hot shot to take over AGAIN. It’s been about 95% Brock so far but Eddie is hanging in there. Eddie gets a knee lock out of nowhere. Brock gets caught in a leg hold. I’m shocked too. He shifts into an STF and the fans ERUPT.

Figure four doesn’t work as Brock kicks him away. Eddie keeps him down but can’t do much as Brock just keeps firing him off. BIG belly to belly by Brock has Eddie in trouble again. A headscissors has Brock in trouble and now back to the knee. There’s the figure four and it’s not bad. After nearly a minute in the hold Brock realizes he’s next to the ropes and gets free.

More leg work as Cole speculates that Eddie could actually do this. STF again as Brock is in trouble but not for long as he just rolls out. Brock gets a big old spinebuster to take over again and locks on a bad looking crossface chicken wing. Off to a sleeper/chinlock kind of thing but here comes Eddie again, driving Brock’s face into the buckle to break it up. Missile dropkick misses though as Eddie is in trouble again. Great story being told here.

Brock SELLS THE KNEE by lifting his leg up when he gets a vertical suplex. Little things like that are what I mean by selling. Brock shouting at Eddie to die is rather creepy. He gets a gutwrench hold on the mat and Eddie is in trouble again. The perk of a guy like Brock is that even a basic hold like that looks devastating when he does it. Eddie gets back and hits Three Amigos. Frog Splash misses though as this is an excellent match.

The most ridiculous looking ref bump I can remember in a long time happens as Eddie kicks the referee while taking an F5. It was just bad looking with how obvious it was. Either that or the referee is really, really stupid. Brock hits the floor and grabs the belt but GOLDBERG is back and spears the heck out of Lesnar.

Eddie covers for two and misses a belt shot. I love the way Brock throws boots to the ribs. Eddie counters an F5 into a DDT “onto the belt” which misses by about 6 inches and hits the Frog Splash to blow the roof off the place and win the title and do the unthinkable which I was typing before Taz said it. I’m no Eddie fan, but that is a cool moment.

Rating: A. This was an excellent match that got over thirty minutes. The ending was solid as Eddie cheated a bit but that was what he did. Also it was his Frog Splash that ended it rather than anything else. Eddie isn’t someone I can get into as much as his fans do but this was easily his crowning glory and the match worked very well. Probably Brock’s best non-Angle match and one of Eddie’s best ever which is saying a lot as he’s a great wrestler in his own right.

Eddie would hold the title for four months before losing it to JBL. After a few months of failed attempts to get the title back, Eddie would team up with Rey Mysterio to win the Smackdown Tag Titles. The team would eventually split and Eddie would turn heel and become a bit of a psycho. He would target Rey’s son Dominic and imply that he was the boy’s father. This of course led to a ladder match at Summerslam 2005.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio

Here’s the solution: “The following contest is a ladder match for the custody of Dominic!” That line summed up the entire feud and is a famous line today. Eddie looks at Rey to start before kneeing him in the ribs to get things going. A hard belly to back suplex puts Rey down but he comes back with a monkey flip to send Guerrero to the floor. Rey is sent straight into the steps and then the ladder as Eddie maintains his early control.

Eddie slides in the ladder and goes up but a springboard dropkick takes Guerrero down. Another ladder is brought in but Rey dropkicks it into Eddie, sending both the ladder and Guerrero to the floor. A great looking springboard seated senton takes Eddie down but Rey is too banged up to immediately climb. They slug it out on the ladder with Eddie taking over but they botch the first big spot of the match: Eddie tries a sunset bomb but Rey falls off a second late, meaning he falls on Eddie instead of with him.

Back up and the ladder crushes Rey in the corner before Eddie brings in a second ladder. Rey is sandwiched between the ladders so Eddie can hit a slingshot hilo in a painful looking spot. Guerrero goes up but Rey sets the other ladder up like a ramp to get to the top. Eddie is backdropped onto the ladder ramp, sending both ladders and both wrestlers crashing down to the mat. Rey goes up one more time but has the ladder dropkicked out from under him in the second crash in 90 seconds.

Eddie lays a ladder on the top rope and drops a charging Rey chest first onto the steel. Guerrero goes up but Dominic gets in and shakes the ladder to stop him. Eddie gets in his face and shouts that he’s the new daddy but Rey stops him from punching the kid. Mysterio moves the ladder against the ropes and sends Eddie into it for the 619. Rey Drops the Dime on the ladder onto Eddie and goes up but gets caught in an electric chair. As they’re about to fall, Rey spins around and slips down Guerrero into a powerbomb.

Rey slowly climbs again but Guerrero kicks the ladder away and catches the falling Rey in another powerbomb. In a smart move, Eddie puts the ladder over Rey before climbing up and grabbing the briefcase. Since he’s a heel in a ladder match though, he takes FOREVER to work the simple clip, allowing Rey to kick the ladder over and pull Eddie down. Rey can’t follow up though and gets caught in Three Amigos with the third on the ladder. Eddie goes up again and here’s Vickie, which makes me think the slow climb was a missed spot where she was supposed to come out. She shoves him down and Rey gets up the ladder for the win.

Rating: B-. This was good but the botches hurt it a lot. The other major problem here is the whole thing is so silly. It’s really hard to get into a match with the prize being a custody of a kid. Are we supposed to believe that Eddie is going to win and presumably abuse the world’s stupidest looking eight year old? I’ve seen far worse but this wasn’t a great match by any stretch. Eddie of course would be gone in about two and a half months but he would beat Rey in a cage match in about ten days.

Eddie would pass away in November 2005 when his heart gave out after years of substance abuse and possibly steroid use. He was soon inducted into the WWE Hall of Fame and would become far more revered in death than he was alive. Overall Guerrero is indeed a very talented wrestler though I never saw him as a main event guy. His time on top didn’t do great business but it wasn’t a disaster either. Guerrero could work well with anyone in the ring and had more classics than I have time to list. Great talent to say the least.

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Royal Rumble 2006
Date: January 29, 2006
Location: American Airlines Arena, Miami, Florida
Attendance: 16,178
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Joey Styles, Tazz

Eddie Guerrero. If you honestly believe this show is about anyone but him, you’re completely wrong and missing the point. Tonight’s show is about milking as much as we possibly can out of Eddie’s dead body, because the entirety of the Smackdown main event scene until Wrestlemania (and even glimpses of it for years to come) would be about Rey Mysterio fighting for Eddie’s memory against people like Orton. I never have been comfortable with this but it is what it is. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about Mark Henry vs. Kurt Angle. The Rumble and Edge vs. Cena gets a little time as well.

Cruiserweight Title: Gregory Helms vs. Kid Kash vs. Funaki vs. Jamie Noble vs. Nunzio vs. Paul London

Kid Kash is champion coming in and this is Texas Tornado rules and one fall to a finish. Helms is from Raw but is here because it’s an open invitational. It’s a big brawl to start and everyone gangs up on Helms. I don’t know if there was a delay of some sort or just a really bad sign, but there are dozens if not hundreds of empty seats visible in the lower arena, most of them opposite the hard camera.

Helms gets beaten into the corner but Kash pulls some other people off for no apparent reason. Nunzio slams Kash onto the mat for one Noble gets two on Nunzio off a powerslam as London hits a dropsalt for two on Noble and Nunzio. Wait apparently those red seats are stairs. Those are rather distracting and the seating structure is odd as there’s a group of about eight seats per row then another set of stairs as opposed to most arenas where there are about twice that many in a row. At least the place isn’t as empty as it seemed.

Nunzio hits a slingshot to send Noble into the corner and Funaki adds a bulldog for two. We finally get to the dives with Nunzio diving on a pair of guys, allowing Noble to get two on Kash via a leg lariat. Noble dives on Helms and Nunzio on the floor and Funaki is knocked off the top onto Nunzio and Noble. London kicks Kash to the floor as well and dives on everyone not named Helms with a shooting star off the top.

Back in and London loads up a shooting star press onto Kash but Helms goes up top at the same time and hooks a swinging neckbreaker to bring London down for two. A brainbuster from Kash kills London again but two guys come in for the save. All six guys are back in the ring now and Kash gets two off a Backstabber on Nunzio. Funaki can’t hit a tornado DDT on Noble and gets caught in a gutbuster for trying. Noble gets sent to the floor by Helms and Gregory hits a Shining Wizard out of nowhere for the pin on Funaki and the title.

Rating: C+. What are you expecting to find here? It’s six guys in the ring all at once and going nuts on each other with spots. There isn’t supposed to be any sort of story or flow to it and there certainly wasn’t here. It was the right choice for an opener and the match worked well enough for its purpose. Fine but nothing memorable at all. Helms would hold the title for over a year.

Teddy gushes to Vince about how excited he is over the Rumble. Vince is happy because he has Torrie, Victoria and Candace Michelle doing the drawing. They were a heel Divas stable at the time which didn’t work at all. HHH and Orton come in to draw and only the latter seems pleased with his number. Amazingly enough, these guys got the EXACT SAME NUMBERS that Guerrero and Flair got when they came in to draw last year.

Trish is looking GREAT in a referee outfit when Mickie, currently the psycho lesbian, comes up and says she loves Trish. Ok then.

Mickie James vs. Ashley Massaro

Trish is referee and I didn’t realize she was in some barely there shorts. I miss Mickie wearing those skirts that often flew up above her waist. The problem with Ashley was simple: she wasn’t that good. Mickie cranks on the arm but Ashley counters into a wristlock of her own. Massaro armdrags Mickie down and it’s clearly Mickie flipping while Ashley moves her arm.

James heads to the floor to get a breather but Ashley hits a clothesline off the apron to take her down. Back in and Mickie snaps, basically turning heel mid-match. Mickie hooks a standing half crab to fill in some time as it’s clear Ashley has nothing to do here. We head to the floor where Mickie rams Ashley’s ribs into the post. Back in and Mickie hooks a bow and arrow hold to work on the back even more.

Ashley catches an incoming kick from Mickie and starts her “offense” but can barely hook a crucifix. The only good thing about it was Mickie’s skirt flying up but the rollup only gets two. Massaro shoves Ashley into the corner and the fans are openly booing now. She’s just absolutely horrible and thankfully Mickie kind of powerbombs her out of the corner for the sloppy pin.

Rating: D. Again, anything with Trish looking that hot involved can’t be considered a failure whatsoever. She was likely there because it was clear that the match was going to be horrible and the fans had to have something to be distracted by. Thankfully Trish and Mickie would get to have their excellent Mania match instead of another Ashley mess. Terrible stuff but hot women in tiny outfits make up for it.

Big Show draws his number. Rey comes in to talk about Eddie a bit. Apparently Eddie is joking with Rey by giving him this number.

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Boogeyman

This is part of an ongoing feud, which involved Boogeyman eating a growth off of Jillian Hall’s face. Do yourself a favor and don’t ask. Oh and I forgot to mention the set. It’s themed like a coliseum with guards opening up the doors for the wrestlers to come in. They did that at some of the old King of the Rings and I still like it.

John hides behind Jillian for awhile and then bails to the floor, leaving the blonde chick to get stalked. Boogeyman puts worms in his mouth and spits them into Jillian’s mouth. Boogey gets sent to the floor and into the steps before JBL chokes away a bit more. The Clothesline misses and a pumphandle powerslam ends JBL in less than two minutes. I have no idea what the point of this was.

Mama Benjamin comes in and hits on Vince. Thankfully Shelton comes in to save Vince from a future paternity suit. Melina comes in to hit on Shelton but Mama takes him away quickly. Mama Benjamin was one of those ideas that didn’t make a ton of sense and didn’t accomplish anything but it certainly exists. MNM draws their numbers as well. Vince and hits girls sit on the couch to watch the Rumble.

Video on the Rumble, which says everyone thinks they’ll win. Vince is vindictive against Shawn around this time too. Apparently there will be some returns tonight as well.

Before the Rumble starts, the Spirit Squad comes out to give us a chant.

Royal Rumble

HHH is #1 and Mysterio is #2, naturally coming out in a lowrider and an Eddie shirt. HHH tries to power him down to start but Rey comes back with kicks to the knee. Rey hits a headscissors to take HHH down and into the corner but HHH lifts him to the apron. Rey comes back with a springboard dropkick to the back but HHH ducks the 619. Simon Dean is #3 and goes after Rey to a bunch of boos. Dean sends him to the apron and wants a high five from HHH but gets punched in the face and hit by a seated senton. The elimination is academic.

Rey takes HHH down and hits a Bronco Buster as Psychosis is #4. He immediately goes after Rey before kicking HHH down. Psychosis busts out a freaky move where he hooks a Rock Bottom grip on Rey but lifts him into the air and slams Rey face down. Rey gets put in a Razor’s Edge position but ranas Psychosis out for the elimination. Ric Flair is #5 and goes right for HHH. They slug it out with Flair taking over but ducking his head into the facebuster. Ric comes back with a crotch grab but HHH rakes the eyes and backdrops Flair out.

Big Show, who hates HHH at the moment, is #6. They were feuding at this time, I believe over HHH injuring Big Show’s hand with the hammer. Show chops him in the corner and HHH falls forward onto Show’s chest. A headbutt keeps Rey down and there’s a side slam to HHH. Like an idiot, Big Show picks up HHH and slams him to the mat instead of to the floor. Coach is #7 and makes it about thirty seconds before Show puts him out.

Show does that stupid slam thing to HHH AGAIN. I’m sure that won’t come back to haunt him or anything. The chokeslam takes HHH down again and here’s Lashley at #8. He and Show slug it out with Show getting backdropped to the mat. Kane, Big Show’s tag champion partner at this point, is #9. He and Lashley stare it down and Kane kicks Lashley’s head off.

Lashley immediately comes back with an overhead belly to belly and a third press slam to HHH. Kane takes a Dominator and Sylvan, the “Smackdown fashion consultant” is #10 and lasts about 18 seconds before Lashley throws him out. Unfortunately he turns around and gets caught in a double chokeslam followed by the elimination. The partners quickly turn on each other with Kane getting a boot up to stop a charging Show. They fight to the ropes and HHH runs up to throw them both out, emulating the same thing Shawn did in 1996 with Vader and Yokozuna.

Carlito is #11 and goes for Mysterio as is the theme tonight. There’s a Backstabber to put Rey down in the corner, where he’s been for a lot of the match tonight. Carlito punches HHH down and here’s Benoit at #12. Everyone gets a German and Carlito taps to a Crossface which means nothing here. HHH breaks it up for no apparent reason and whips Benoit hard into the corner.

The Game puts Benoit on the apron and they fight over a suplex with Benoit winding up on the top rope. Benoit headbutts HHH down and hits the Swan Dive before Booker T is #13. He’s US Champion here and in tights, which suggests an injury to me. Oh yeah he’s barely moving out there and just letting Benoit chop him. Benoit dumps him in about 20 seconds so yeah Booker must have been hurt.

Benoit chops on HHH until Joey Mercury is #14. Mercury fires off dropkicks but gets caught in Rolling Germans. Carlito jumps Benoit to break it up and Mercury pounds on Benoit a bit. Freaking Tatanka is #15, giving us a group of Mysterio, HHH, Carlito, Benoit, Mercury and Tatanka. Seriously why did the bring TATANKA back? He fires off chops as the fans do the Seminole chant.

Johnny Nitro is #16 to give us the Smackdown tag champions in the ring at the same time. HHH is upside down as Tatanka chops Nitro down. Nitro is John Morrison if you don’t remember him. Mysterio is finally back to his feet after being down for about half the time he’s been in the match. Trevor Murdoch is #17 and chops away on Tatanka as the match calms down again. Eugene is #18 and immediately Hulks Up, hooking an airplane spin on Murdoch. Mysterio hits a double bulldog to take both guys down to remind us that he’s still there.

Road Warrior Animal is #18 and immediately takes MNM’s heads off with a double clothesline. A powerslam puts Nitro down and we hit another lull. RVD is #20 and is back for the first time in nearly a year. Animal and Benoit have a staredown until Benoit gets kicked in the face. RVD kicks MNM down and backdrops Animal out to finally clear some room out in the ring.

Orlando Jordan is #21 and no one cares. Van Dam hits a kick to Carlito’s face off the top and Chavo Guerrero is #22. Nitro takes Three Amigos but Chavo goes up and is immediately knocked out by HHH. Matt Hardy is #23 and hits the Twist of Fate on Jordan. RVD and Rey combine to get HHH to the apron but they can’t get him out. MNM put out Tatanka and there are way too many people in this match with three letter initials. Super Crazy is #24 and literally flips to the ring.

At the moment we’ve got HHH, Mysterio, Carlito, Benoit, Mercury, Nitro, Murdoch, Eugene, RVD, Jordan, Hardy, Crazy and now Shawn Michaels at #25. Why are there THIRTEEN PEOPLE in the ring at once? Everyone swarms Shawn but he punches them all off until Murdoch gets in some shots on him in the corner. There goes Trevor and Carlito knocks Shawn to the apron but not out.

Chris Masters is #26 and Hardy sends HHH to the apron. Viscera is #27 in his World’s Largest Love Machine period. He sits on Matt and does his anal rape thing as Mercury saves himself from being eliminated. Matt gets some boots up in the corner but is thrown out pretty quickly thereafter. Shelton is #28 and Benoit eliminates Eugene. Goldust returns at #29 and chops a bunch of people to no reaction.

Orton is FINALLY #30, giving us a final group of HHH, Mysterio, Carlito, Benoit, Mercury, Nitro, RVD, Jordan, Crazy, HBK, Masters, Viscera, Benjamin, Goldust and Orton, or HALF THE PEOPLE IN THE MATCH. To give you an idea of how lame the star power is other than like three people in this, the final five were Masters, Viscera, Shelton, Goldust and Orton. Other than Randy that’s like a medium budget indy show, not the last five entrants to the Royal Rumble.

Randy almost immediately puts out Benoit. Seriously? You can’t put out Masters or Jordan? It just HAD TO BE Benoit??? An RKO takes down Viscera so Masters and Carlito can throw him out. Carlito immediately turns on his partner and dumps Masters. Goldie loads up Shattered Dreams on Carlito and gets in a good kick, only to be eliminated by RVD. Orton puts out Jordan and Shawn and HHH finally go at it. MNM double teams Shawn but gets eliminated for their efforts.

Shawn has to skin the cat to stay in and turns into a kick to the head from Shelton. Michaels is cool with that and sends Shelton to the apron followed by a superkick to eliminate him. This brings out Vince who hates Shawn and the distraction lets Shane run in and dump HBK. Shawn is ticked and runs back in and superkicks HHH after escaping a Pedigree attempt. He goes after Vince but a single referee stops him. Ok then.

We’re down to Carlito, Van Dam, HHH, Mysterio and Orton. Van Dam kicks Carlito out and we’re down to four. Van Dam kicks Orton in the head and teams up with Mysterio to beat on the Evolution guys. Rob goes up top but HHH crotches him and sends Rey into the corner to knock Van Dam out, getting us down to three. Evolution teams up on Rey but he knocks them both into the ropes for a double 619. Orton takes the seated senton but HHH clotheslines Rey down.

Orton powerslams HHH down but the RKO is countered into a spinebuster. HHH goes after Rey and gets flipped out to get us down to two. Cole’s voice is almost gone. HHH, ever the nice guy, pulls Rey to the floor and sends him into the steps. Mysterio is basically dead so Orton takes his sweet time. That’s his downfall though, as Rey counters the elimination attempt into a rana and sends Orton out for the win. Naturally he had to be #2 which the WWE considers less than #1 for absolutely no apparent reason, but that’s HHH for you.

Rating: C-. This isn’t a bad match, but man alive is it boring. There are three major problems in this match. First of all, there were WAY too many people in the ring at most given times. Like I said, once Orton got in there we had fifteen people in the ring at once. That’s double what the number should be around and it clutters things up way too much with that many people in there.

Second, as I touched on near the end, the talent pool was pretty shallow here. I mean, MNM aren’t bad but they don’t need to be in the final grouping of the Rumble. Guys like Masters and Carlito should have been eliminated earlier but just stuck in there. That gets old fast and it was begging for someone like Shawn to come in there and eliminate like five guys at once.

Finally, since there were so many people in there at once, it was hard to focus on any single story. You had stuff like HHH trying to go wire to wire but that got lost in the shuffle. Rey was on the mat for long stretches of time so he wasn’t really noticed either. Shawn’s issues with Vince only popped up for the elimination and were only touched on. When you can’t focus on one thing, you can’t focus on anything and that makes for a dull match. One good thing was that Rey wasn’t a guaranteed winner, so there was some drama. It’s not a bad Rumble but it was badly run.

Mickie comes in to hit on Trish as she does an interview on WWE.com.

Rey celebrates when Edge comes in and says don’t even think of challenging him at Mania.

We recap Edge vs. Cena. Edge won MITB back at Mania and waited nine months before cashing in on Cena after Cena survived the Elimination Chamber. Tonight is the rematch three weeks later.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Edge

Cena walks across a catwalk that lowered from the ceiling and hops in over the top. You know, in case it’s wasn’t clear enough that Edge had no chance here. Cena clotheslines him down to start but has to chase Edge back inside, allowing the champion to send Cena into the buckle. We head to the floor again with Cena having to avoid Lita and getting sent into the steps as a result. A baseball slide sends Cena over the barricade and the match stops again.

Edge tries for a countout but Cena DIVES back in at nine. Back in and Cena pounds away but charges into a spinwheel kick for two from the Canadian. Edge punches Cena to the floor again but goes after him instead of going for the countout again. Cena gets sent into the steps and back inside a missile dropkick gets two for the champion. Edge loads up a superplex but gets shoved off, only to avoid a guillotine legdrop from Cena.

Cena grabs a quick FU attempt but Edge counters into a rollup for two. A big boot puts Cena down but he rolls through a top rope cross body for two. Edge tries a rear naked choke of all things which Cena eventually breaks up. The spear misses and there’s a DDT to put both guys down. It’s Cena up first to start his finishing sequence but Lita distracts the referee. Edge misses a charge and is sent into Lita, setting up Cena for the FU and STFU to get the title back.

Rating: D+. This was a world title match at the Royal Rumble? Why? Edge never felt like he had Cena in trouble and the match wasn’t anything that you would remember five minutes after it ended. Lita’s cleavage was awesome but when that’s the best thing about a match….well you shouldn’t be surprised because it often was in Edge’s matches, but still, pretty lame match here that made Edge look like a footnote. Obviously that would change, but not a good start for him here.

Edge freaks out on Todd Grisham in the back. Edge storms off and Lita panics a bit. We get a random Hacksaw Jim Duggan cameo (does anyone do those better?) to call her a HO!

We recap Angle vs. Henry. Batista had been scheduled to face henry but tore his triceps and had to vacate the title. Angle won the title in a battle royal and gets to defend here. The idea is that Henry is way too strong for Angle. Seriously, that’s the story. Why this main evented the show isn’t quite clear.

Angle is all I’M THE BEST WRESTLER IN THE WORLD and no one can beat me. He leaves but comes back to tell Mark Henry that he SUCKS. This version of Angle was AWESOME, as he would just go out there and go beast mode on everyone and make them look like fools trying to keep up with him. Also he was perfect for a quick title reign like this as no one would question him popping up out of nowhere and taking the title. Those kind of people are hard to find but Kurt was one of them.

Smackdown World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Mark Henry

Angle gets overpowered to start. That’s about all there is to say for the first two minutes or so, as Kurt keeps getting shoved around and then taken to the floor. Henry whips him into the steps and then stands on Angle’s chest back inside. We hit a bearhug for a bit until Angle hiptosses out of it. He tries a cross body like an imbecile but rolls out of the World’s Strongest Slam. The ankle lock and Angle Slam are no good so Henry clubs him down again.

Instead Angle hits a German (kind of) to put both guys down. The Angle Slam gets two (duh) and the ankle lock is broken up again. The counter causes the referee to get bumped so Angle gets a chair. A low blow and two chair shots take Henry down for two, so Angle takes a buckle off. Kurt drop toeholds him into the buckle and rolls Henry up to retain. Our hero everyone.

Rating: D. Seriously, why was this……

And a gong strikes. That’s why.

As for the match, it sucked pretty terribly. Why would we buy Henry as a potential champion here after him showing no proof of being at that level? The match wasn’t even ten minutes long, making it feel much more like a TV match than a PPV title match. I know they wanted to do the big ending with Taker, but there had to be a better way to do it.

Taker comes out in a freaking horse drawn chariot and motions that he wants the title. Then he shoots lightning from his hands at the stuff over the ring, before slamming his arms down to send lightning at the posts. The ring collapses to end the show. Yeah that happened.

Overall Rating: D. I watched this show over the course of two days, and honestly the only thing that came to my mind other than the last ten minutes of it was how Trish looked in that referee outfit. That’s how completely forgettable this show is. Nothing came out of this show as Cena was champion all over again, making the last three weeks feel like nothing. Nothing to see here and definitely not worth seeing.

Ratings Comparison

Gregory Helms vs. Kid Kash vs. Funaki vs. Jamie Noble vs. Nunzio vs. Paul London

Original: B-

Redo: C+

Mickie James vs. Ashley Massaro

Original: C-

Redo: D

Boogeyman vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

Original: F-

Redo: N/A

Royal Rumble

Original: D

Redo: C-

John Cena vs. Edge

Original: B

Redo: D+

Kurt Angle vs. Mark Henry

Original: D-

Redo: D

Overall Rating

Original: C-

Redo: D

What was I on for that Edge vs. Cena match?

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/25/royal-rumble-count-up-2006-eddie-guerrero-puts-on-a-mask-and-wins-the-rumble/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of In Your House at Amazon for just $4 at:

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for just $4 at:

Royal Rumble 2004
Date: January 25, 2004
Location: Wachovia Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 17,289
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz, Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

This is the show where you can really see the next generation rising up. The main events other than the Rumble are Lesnar vs. Holly and HBK vs. HHH. Ok so maybe the next generation only comes up in the Rumble. Other than that we don’t have much going on here but this show is all about Benoit in the Rumble. Let’s get to it.

The opening video talks about Shawn vs. HHH because that’s what people are watching the ROYAL RUMBLE for right? The theme of the video is that things can change in the blink of an eye.

Raw Tag Titles: Dudley Boys vs. Evolution

Flair and Batista are defending here and this is a tables match. Coach is ticked off at the Dudleys for putting him through a table six nights ago on Raw, because if there’s one man you need to give a reason to be a heel, it’s COACH. Batista makes fun of the Eagles because he hasn’t broken through to the other side of the glass ceiling yet. The fight starts in the aisle as you would expect. This is one table to a finish, meaning only one guy has to go through to end it.

Bubba slides in a table but shoves it hard enough that it slides across the ring and hits Batista in the ribs on the other side of the floor. Flair gets double teamed to start and caught in a powerslam by D-Von. There’s a table set up in the ring but Batista moves it before Flair gets suplexed through it. D-Von hits a Cactus Clothesline on Batista as Flair chops Bubba against a table in the corner.

Big Dave comes back in with some clotheslines to clean house but misses a charge into the post. The belly to back neckbreaker from the Dudleys puts him down and it’s Flair getting double teamed again. According to JR, the Dudleys are the only team to win the (non-vacant) world tag team titles at the Rumble. Coach heads to the ring to distract the Dudleys and prevent a 3D to Flair. Flair saves Coach and Batista hits a spinebuster to put D-Von through a table to retain.

Rating: D. This match fell into the same trap that all bad tables matches fall into: the dull set of spots that fail until one works for the win. You rarely get something that gets around this through sheer carnage such as the match at the 2000 Rumble, but this was just terrible. I have no idea what they were going for here as the fans were disappointed and they only had four and a half minutes to get into it. Also: real smart WWE. This is the right way to start a show in Philadelphia: have some of the most famous ECW guys ever lose.

Cena raps about winning the Rumble when RVD comes in to steal the joke. Weed jokes are made. Josh Matthews looks like the king of all tools here.

There’s an empty seat for Mick Foley in the front row.

Cruiserweight Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Jamie Noble

Rey is defending. This is during the Nidia is Blind phase which didn’t do anything for anyone. They speed things WAY up to start with Jamie avoiding the 619 and launching Rey into the air to take over. The champ gets draped over the top rope for two and a hard kick to the back gets the same.

Jamie hooks a chinlock which shifts into a seated abdominal stretch. Rey fights up and hits a dropkick and a springboard rana followed by the sitout bulldog for two. He springboards into a gutbuster from Noble for two though and momentum shifts again. Nidia accidentally grabs Noble’s foot, allowing Rey to hit the 619 and springboard legdrop…..for the pin? Huh?

Rating: D+. This was fast paced while it lasted, but those three words are the key: while it lasted. This barely broke three minutes which simply isn’t enough for a PPV title match. Unless I was missing it there was no sign of an injury or anything like that, but the match ends that fast. I have no idea what they were going for here but it didn’t work in any way at all. That’s a shame too because they were going well while it lasted.

Noble yells at Nidia post match.

We recap the battle of the Guerreros. Eddie was clearly the bigger star which was fine while they were champions, but once they lost the belts to the Bashams, Chavo blamed Eddie and turned on his uncle for losing his title. The Guerreros almost made up but they lost the rematch, after which Chavo let Eddie get double teamed by the Bashams. This was actually a pretty solid story despite how basic it was. Sometimes less is more. Oh and Kurt Angle was playing peacemaker and Chavo Guerrero Senior is in his son’s corner.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Chavo Guerrero

Chavo bails to the floor before the bell and the fans are totally behind Eddie here. They fight over a lockup to start with no one being able to get an advantage. Chavo slaps Eddie in the face and now we’re ready to go. We hit the mat for a bit before Eddie starts snapping off chops in the corner. Chavo shoulders him down and we have a standoff. They chop it out again and Eddie goes to the eye like a true Guerrero.

Back to the mat with Eddie working on the arm before Chavo nips up and hooks a rana to send them both to the floor. Chavo sends Eddie into the announce table to finally take over and get some of the aggression going. Back in and they get into a kind of MMA style brawl on the mat until Eddie hooks a cross armbreaker of all things. That goes nowhere so Chavo suplexes Eddie down for two, followed by the Three Amigos. Eddie counters a tornado DDT and hits Three Amigos of his own. Chavo is down so Eddie goes up and hits the Frog Splash for the pin. ANOTHER quick ending tonight.

Rating: C+. This was way better than the other matches, but this felt like it was missing fifteen minutes or so. Three matches so far have combined to be about fifteen minutes long which is pretty lame for a modern PPV, even for the Rumble. This could have been a lot more, but the feud was completely done after tonight. Eddie would become #1 contender on the following Smackdown.

Eddie destroys Chavo post match in a pretty heelish display. Chavo gets busted open.

Ad for Mick Foley’s Greatest Hits and Misses. That’s the most entertaining part of the show so far.

Benoit likes his odds even though he’s #1 in the Rumble. Evolution comes up and says Orton is going to win the Rumble. Flair says Benoit may be great, but this is about Evolution tonight.

We recap Hardcore Holly vs. Lesnar. Brock broke Holly’s neck (legit) and Holly gets a world title shot out of it a year later. This is the textbook definition of the Rumble title shot where no one buys the champion as being in any danger whatsoever.

Smackdown World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Hardcore Holly

Holly jumps Lesnar in the aisle and sends him into the post because he wants to break Lesnar’s neck. We get a bell and Holly misses an elbow off the top to give Brock control. They head to the floor where Holly’s back is rammed into the apron and Lesnar hooks a reverse body vice back inside. That goes nowhere so Brock hits a Shell Shock for two and it’s right back to the hold.

We shift to a bearhug and then one of the most wicked overhead belly to belly suplexes you’ll ever see. Off to a kind of rear naked choke by Lesnar to keep things dull. Holly makes his comeback with the dropkick and hits the Alabama Slam but goes for a full nelson and revenge instead of the title. Holly hooks the hold and goes to the floor with it but has to break the count. The F5 hits a few seconds later to complete the inevitable.

Rating: D. This was Brock Lesnar defending the world title against Hardcore Holly on pay per view. If you can’t figure out why this got the rating it got, I can’t help you.

We recap HHH vs. HBK which is allegedly seven years in the making. I’m guessing THIS is supposed to be the FINAL blowoff to their feud instead of the classic in 2002.

Raw World Title: Shawn Michaels vs. HHH

HHH is defending and this is a last man standing match. They chop it out to start and punch each other in the corner a lot. Shawn tries a backslide before realizing that makes no sense here, so it’s back to the chops. Michaels gets caught in a facebuster as things slow down a bit. A HARD whip into the corner has Shawn’s back in trouble and a backbreaker makes it even worse.

Out of nowhere Shawn takes out the leg and hooks a Figure Four, because where would we be without a Flair tribute? That gets a five count so Shawn hits a chop block for a four. HHH low bridges Shawn and we head to the floor for a bit. HHH loads up the announce table but Shawn blocks a Pedigree attempt. They slug it out on the table with HHH getting knocked to the floor, drawing a bunch of booing from the bloodthirsty Philadelphia fans.

Back in and Shawn counters a Pedigree with a backdrop to the floor but he injures his back in the process. Shawn tries a springboard cross body to the floor but crashes through the table instead as only he can. Instead of letting the now busted open Shawn get counted out, HHH throws him back in for the count, which reaches seven. The champ pounds Shawn down a few times for a few counts, most of which don’t get that far.

A fast spinebuster (literally, as Shawn was flying at HHH and it almost looked like a belly to belly instead of a spinebuster) gets about six. That’s the problem with most last man standing matches: it’s a big move then standing around for the count. That makes it very hard to get any kind of flow going to the match. HHH cracks Shawn in the back with a chair but Shawn gets up again. A Pedigree onto the chair is countered into a slingshot into the post, busting HHH open as well.

Now Shawn cracks HHH in the head with a chair, allowing HHH to do his weird “my head hurts and I’m not sure where I am” face. There’s the forearm followed by the nipup from Shawn, followed by an atomic drop and the top rope elbow. That gets about seven so Shawn tunes up the band, only to walk into a low blow to put both guys down. Shawn hooks a sleeper which eventually gets an eight count before walking into a DDT to put both guys down.

That gets a double eight count before we head to the corner. HHH tries a belly to back superplex but Shawn counters into a cross body for another double eight count. The Pedigree hits but it’s only good for a nine. Shawn pops up out of nowhere with some more Sweet Chin Music, putting both guys down for ten which keeps the title on HHH.

Rating: C-. The problem here is exactly what I said earlier: this was a lot of laying around. The last seven minutes or so had about five moves combined, as most of the match was “move, lay down, move, lay down, move, lay down.” The idea is supposed to be a ton of drama, but that didn’t happen here. Shawn would turn into a jerk in the next few weeks and insert himself in the Mania main event because of this ending.

Rumble video with a focus on Benoit.

The Fink is ready to start the Rumble but here’s Bischoff to run his mouth. He says that a Raw guy is going to win the Rumble because he’s respected as a GM. He runs down ECW, which brings out Heyman for a brawl. Cue Austin on his ATV to say that these two are both in violation of the law (he was called Sheriff Austin at this point) and wants to know who started it. Heyman and Bischoff: “HE DID!” Both guys get Stunners and the fans love it.

Goldberg, #30 in the Rumble, doesn’t get to talk because Lesnar comes in to interrupt him. Lesnar is called a coward, which will come into play later.

JR has to admit Foley is a coward because he isn’t here yet.

Royal Rumble

Benoit is #1 and the Intercontinental Champion Randy Orton is #2. Two minute intervals here again. They pound away on each other to start with Benoit taking him to the mat to stomp away. Mark Henry is #3 when he was a fat power guy with no direction at all. Allow me to be more specific: he’s still with Teddy Long. Benoit gets double teamed for awhile until Tajiri is #4. These intervals don’t seem to be two minutes or anywhere close to it.

The handspring elbow takes Orton down but Benoit rolls some Germans on Tajiri to take him down. Tajiri only gets two as I guess Benoit is conserving strength. Henry throws Orton to the apron but stops looking like an idiot. Bradshaw is #5 and he immediately clotheslines down everyone not named Benoit. Benoit takes offense to being left out and puts Bradshaw in the Crossface before pulling Bradshaw out. Eh he would get a nine month title reign stating in the summer so I feel no sympathy for him.

Rhyno is #6 as we’re flying through this so far. He goes after the two starters as Tajiri fires off kicks on Henry. Tajiri gets a half Tarantula on Henry but Henry gets Gored, knocking Tajiri out in the process. Benoit clotheslines Henry out and we’re down to three again. Matt Hardy is #7 and Benoit throws him to the apron almost immediately. In FAR less than two minutes, here’s Scott Steiner at #8. Oh dear it’s Scott Steiner at the Royal Rumble. This could be a disaster.

He starts firing off suplexes immediately but at least this time there are some t-bones to go with the belly to bellies. Benoit rolls some Germans on him as if to say THIS IS HOW YOU SUPLEX SOMEBODY. Things slow down a bit and here’s Matt Morgan at #9. He takes Benoit down with a Batista Bomb takes Benoit down and pounds away on Orton in the corner.

The Hurricane is #10 and comes in off the top with a cross body to Hardy. He goes after Morgan for no apparent reason and is thrown out in less than twenty seconds. Morgan throws Hardy to the apron again but can’t get him out. Booker T, complete with the stupid remix of his theme music with Booker singing, is #11. Booker immediately goes after Steiner in a revisiting of their WCW feud that no one was asking for.

Nothing of note happens until Kane is #12. This is after he buried Taker alive. For the first time. Steiner gets dumped by Booker during Kane’s entrance. Kane starts firing off chokeslams and other various power moves for which he is well known. The clock runs down at #13 and there go the lights. A gong goes off and Kane PANICS. Booker uses the distraction to dump Kane and here’s Spike Dudley at #13. He never makes it to the ring as Kane destroys him for setting off the gong.

Everyone tries to throw each other out while laying on the ropes until Rikishi is #14. Benoit dumps Rhyno to keep us at six people (Benoit, Orton, Rikishi, Booker, Morgan, Hardy) in the ring. Morgan gets a Stinkface and nothing else happens for a bit. Renee Dupree with the French Tickler is #15. In a surprising moment, Dupree actually knocks Matt out, only to be superkicked out by Rikishi a second later.

A-Train is #16 and goes right for Rikishi. Benoit avoids the yet to be named Carbon Footprint and dumps Morgan. I love that they’re keeping the ring from getting full. Orton dumps Rikishi and Booker as Shelton Benjamin is #17. Benoit dumps A-Train during his entrance and Orton dumps Shelton a few seconds later to get us back to two. Orton pounds on him a bit but they crack heads to put both guys down.

Lamont, the announcer for Ernest Miller (complete with the music that would go to Brodus Clay eight years later), runs out to introduce the Cat at #18. After some dancing (and singing by Tazz), Orton dumps him out. Miller would be released in like two weeks. Kurt Angle is #19 and he might be a bit harder to get out. He’s fighting for AMERICA here so the fans tell him he sucks.

Benoit and Angle destroy each other with chops and punches as only they can while Orton is content to chill in the corner. Rico, now in his Adrian Street phase, is #20. He fires off some kicks but lasts about as long as you would expect him to in a match with Orton, Angle and Benoit. The RKO takes care of Rico as Benoit rolls a ton of Germans on Angle. Test is #21…..and is nowhere in sight.

Orton RKO’s Angle and we cut to the back to see Test unconscious. Austin sees someone off camera and says they’re #21. The off camera man and presumable attacker: MICK FREAKING FOLEY! Orton, the guy who spat in Foley’s face and called him a coward, PANICS. The place goes nuts and Foley explodes on Orton, beating him half to death and hitting a Cactus Clothesline to put both of them out. This would lead to some AWESOME matches at Mania and Backlash which put Orton up to the world title in August.

Foley keeps beating on Orton as Christian is #22. Mick picks up the steps and BLASTS a security guy who tries to stop him. Orton comes back with two chair shots and fires back at Mick. They brawl up the ramp and Foley pulls out Socko, only to put it on Nunzio who comes in at #23. We haven’t seen anything of the match for awhile but I can live with that for a hot brawl like this. Orton kicks Foley low and runs as we go back to the ring.

Angle is getting double teamed as Nunzio is down on the floor. Big Show is #24 and apparently that’s Tazz’s pick. Thankfully he’s in the singlet and shorts again instead of the one piece swimsuit. Angle immediately goes after him but Show throws everyone around. Jericho is #25 as he’s in a weird phase of his career. He wasn’t a main event guy anymore but he had feuded with everyone in the midcard already so he just kind of hung around and filled in spots on the card.

All four guys go after Big Show (who has a head like a typewriter according to Tazz) but they can’t get him out. Charlie Haas is #26 but gets double teamed by Jericho and Christian. Currently we have Benoit, Angle, Jericho, Christian, Haas, Big Show and Nunzio who is on the floor. Jericho backdrops Christian out for the second year in a row as Billy Gunn is #27. Apparently this is a return for him. It’s Fameassers all around and then things slow down again.

John Cena is #28 and that pop is growing at an alarming rate. Show stares him down so Cena throws Nunzio in to kill some time. Nunzio goes after Show for some reason but Cena takes over for him to make it fair. RVD is #29 to a big pop of his own. It’s spin kicks all around until things settle down a bit. There’s an FU to Angle and Goldberg is #30. The final group: Benoit, Angle, Big Show, Jericho, Nunzio, Haas, Gunn, Cena, RVD and Goldberg. At least the ring didn’t fill up until the end so that’s not too bad.

Goldie spears a lot of people down to start before Nunzio jumps on his back like an idiot. Haas is put out and Nunzio takes a HUGE spear. Gunn is out as is Nunzio to get us down to seven. Goldberg loads up a Jackhammer on Show but Lesnar runs in with an F5 to break it up. Goldberg stares down Brock, allowing Angle to dump him out. All five remaining guys not named Big Show go after the one named Big Show but it still doesn’t work.

Everyone hits their finishers on Show instead with Cena (Show’s feud at the time) hitting the Shuffle instead of the FU, which I’m assuming they were saving for Mania. They try to dead lift Show and realize they screwed up by knocking a giant unconscious. Show shoves them all off and dumps Cena followed by Van Dam a few seconds later.

So it’s Big Show, Benoit, Angle and Jericho as the final four. Jericho gets sent to the apron twice and manages to hang on before bulldogging Show down. The Walls go on Show and he taps but Angle breaks the hold up for no apparent reason. Show chokeslams Benoit down but chokeslams Jericho even further, sending him to the floor to get us to three. A side slam puts Angle down and there’s another chokeslam to Benoit.

Show breaks up a German attempt from Angle but can’t block an Angle Slam. There’s a Slam to Benoit (it was a belly to back suplex but whatever) and the ankle lock to Show. Show taps again, but again it doesn’t mean anything. The big guy rolls through the hold and eliminates Angle in the process, getting us down to two.

Benoit dropkicks Show but knocks him back into the ring by mistake. A chokeslam is countered into the Crossface and Show taps again, but you know the drill by now. Show shrugs it off and picks Benoit up in a chokeslam. Benoit graps a front chancery though and pulls Show to the apron….then has him teetering on the ropes…..AND BENOIT WINS! The crowd kept getting louder as Benoit pulled further and further. Awesome sequence there.

Rating: A. There were some slow spots but this was ALL about Benoit and I can’t complain about that at all. The ending sequence here with all three submission guys making Show tap was a cool idea and different than the ending to any other Rumble. They didn’t throw a stupid curve here and made Benoit look like a star here, which is exactly what he was supposed to do. Great Rumble.

Overall Rating: B-. The Rumble is really REALLY good but the rest is horrible. Don’t watch the rest of the show, but if you’re a Benoit fan and can still sit through a long match of his, this is absolutely required viewing. Things would change a bit more the next year as two REALLY big names would be the stars of the Rumble, but that’s not for another year. For now, this was all about Benoit and he nailed it.

Ratings Comparison

Evolution vs. Dudley Boys

Original: C

Redo: D

Rey Mysterio vs. Jamie Noble

Original: N/A

Redo: D+

Chavo Guerrero vs. Eddie Guerero

Original: C+

Redo: C+

Brock Lesnar vs. Hardcore Holly

Original: D-

Redo: D

HHH vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: C+

Redo: C-

Royal Rumble

Original: A

Redo: A

Overall Rating

Original: C+

Redo: B-

Just as last time, the Rumble is the only thing worth seeing.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/23/royal-rumble-count-up-2004-he-who-must-not-be-named/

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We stick with the Hispanic names today as we look at Chavo Guerrero Jr. due to it being Chavo Sr.’s birthday.

Of course Chavo is best known as the nephew of Eddie Guerrero and part of the Guerrero Family. He got his start in WCW back in 1996 and in WCW tradition, a career record of 1-1 is enough for a United States Title match, which he received against Ric Flair from August 3, 1996 on WCW Saturday Night.

US Title: Ric Flair vs. Chavo Guerrero Jr.

The announcers spend most of the match talking about the Outsiders attacking WCW guys in the back at Nitro and Giant vs. Hogan at Hog Wild. Flair and Chavo wrestle to the mat with Flair in control, only to have Chavo nip up and take Ric down by the leg. Back up and Chavo gets the fans clapping so Flair throws him to the floor. Woman rakes Chavo’s eyes but they trade chops back inside, only to have Flair atomic drop Guerrero down. There’s the Figure Four and Chavo taps out.

Rating: D+. The match was nothing special but it’s always cool to see someone who would become a bigger deal getting their start. Chavo was just a guy in trunks who had a much better uncle, but that uncle would eventually play a key role in upgrading Chavo’s career. Nothing match here and the announcers weren’t interested in the action at all.

Chavo would continue to be nothing of note for the next two years until he started associating with his heel Uncle Eddie. This eventually led to Chavo losing a match to Eddie and becoming his unwilling follower. Eddie forced Chavo to be evil, only to have Chavo turn the tables and become insane to the point that Eddie had no idea what to do. They would square off again at Bash at the Beach in a hair vs. hair match.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Chavo Guerrero Jr.

Loser gets a haircut. They lock up to start and Eddie leapfrogs him, only to be bitten on the tights, sending him out to the floor. Back in and Eddie asks the referee to look at the injury but Charles Robinson is just fine thank you. Now Chavo wants to dance a bit. A frustrated Eddie kicks the turnbuckle and injures his foot, sending him out to the floor. Eddie throws in a chair but Chavo sits down in it and asks Eddie to come in. Things settle down a bit and Eddie gets on his knees to ask for a handshake. Chavo takes his hand and pulls Eddie into a clothesline as we actually get going.

Eddie hides in the corner at the referee’s knees but gets bitten again as the comedy continues. Eddie finally dropkicks the knee out and sends Chavo into the corner to take over. Some shoulders to Chavo’s back in the corner have him in even more trouble and a gutbuster puts him down again. A low dropkick sets up a slingshot hilo to stay on Chavo’s back and the nephew is in trouble. There’s the Gory Special in the middle of the ring but Chavo gets his legs free, only to be clotheslined right back down.

We hit a camel clutch on Chavo for a bit before Eddie fires off some chops against the ropes. Chavo avoids a dropkick and scores with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker to put Eddie down. Eddie pulls the trunks to send Chavo to the floor and pulls back the mats. The brainbuster is countered though and Chavo suplexes him down onto the exposed concrete. Back in and Chavo goes up again but gets crotched down, setting up an Eddie superplex to put both guys down.

Back up and Chavo launches Eddie over his head and face first into the turnbuckle but Chavo’s frog splash hits knees. Eddie’s tornado DDT (Chavo’s finisher) puts Chavo down and Eddie goes for the scissors. That’s not cool with Little Naitch so Eddie tries the frog splash to a similar result. Now Chavo goes for the scissors but the referee takes them away, allowing Eddie to get a rollup for the pin.

Rating: B-. To no surprise, this was a good match. Chavo has grown up a lot in this feud and the matches are getting better and better every time. I’m digging Chavo being crazy yet brilliant with stuff like the handshake submission earlier. He’s gone from nothing to an interesting character which was the idea all along.

Post match Chavo grabs the electric clippers and shaves his own hair off. He offers to cut Eddie’s as well so they can be twins. Chavo: “You don’t want to cut my hair? What a psycho!” Chavo cuts his own hair and shaves the whole thing off.

Not a lot would happen to Chavo for the next few years other than fighting various cruiserweights. Eventually Vince Russo would become head of creative in WCW and if there’s one thing Russo can do, it’s ensure that everyone has something to do. Therefore, Chavo was turned into Lieutenant Loco and put into a military style group called the Misfits in Action. Chavo would win the Cruiserweight Title on Thunder and defend it at the 2000 Great American Bash against the Disco Inferno.

Cruiserweight Title: Disco Inferno vs. Lieutenant Loco

 

Loco is Chavo Guerrero and is champion here. Chavo says he has a surprise for Disco: and it’s something that the announcers aren’t thrilled with him having. I don’t particularly care since they’re not sure either but apparently it’s something they would have gotten in trouble for having. Disco is part of the Filthy Animals here. Can we just look at Major Gunns and Tygress?

 

Everyone is chilling at ringside so it looks like a lumberjack match for the most part. Disco is in a Lakers jersey and Chavo is in blue camouflage so this is a rather weird looking match to say the least. Chavo takes over to start but Disco gets a hot shot to take over. And never mind as he gets sent to the floor for the quick beatdown by the Misfits. Scott dubs Disco the Hip Hop Inferno.

 

Big dive off the top by Chavo takes out Disco as this match is dragging badly. It’s not that bad but it’s just a bit boring to say the least. Back in the rind and Disco gets a slam and dances a bit. Some old dude in a helmet wanders out to hit on Tygress. Apparently he’s General Rection’s grandfather so Konnan shoves him down. While that’s going on Juvy comes in and beats up Loco but Lash Leroux takes out Disco and puts Chavo on top for the pin.

 

Rating: D. What a freaking mess. You have Chavo who was incredible at this point and Disco who was……well Chavo was incredible at this point so he more than could have carried a five minute match by himself. Instead this was a total wreck with no flow at all to it and barely any wrestling at all. Why do I have a feeling that this is going to be a running theme tonight?

Chavo would stick around the Cruiserweight Title scene until the demise of WCW. He would head over to the WWF and be stuck in the same scene until the tag division on Smackdown started to roll. Yet again Chavo’s career picked up due to being paired with his Uncle Eddie, as he was here at Survivor Series 2002 in an elimination tag match for the Tag Team Titles.

Smackdown Tag Titles: Edge/Rey Mysterio vs. Kurt Angle/Chris Benoit vs. Los Guerreros

Edge and Mysterio are champions and this is under elimination rules. It’s Mysterio vs. Benoit to start which is fine with me. Benoit hits a HARD chop but gets caught in a rana and a flapjack to give Rey what will likely be a short lived advantage. Off to Edge for a double hiptoss before Kurt gets the tag and a big pop. Chavo punches Angle in the back of the head and that’s a tag apparently.

Chavo gets shouldered down but nips up immediately. Off to Mysterio vs. Eddie which is one of those pairings that works no matter what. A headscissors takes Eddie down and it’s off to Kurt to face the masked dude. They’re going very fast paced so far. Angle misses a charge into the post but Rey takes too much time on the top and gets run over by Kurt. The Olympian tags in the psycho who suplexes Rey down for two.

Back to Angle who suplexes Rey down and gets in a cheap shot on Edge. The Angle Slam is countered but Angle clotheslines Rey down instead. Back to Chris as Tazz talks about Los Guerreros not wanting to get in yet. The battling partners tag in again so Angle can put on a front facelock. Rey fights up after about a minute in the hold and kicks Kurt in the face to take him down.

There’s the hot tag to Edge who cleans house with a bunch of suplexes. Eddie comes in and goes to the floor with Rey. Edge misses the spear and gets caught in a Crossface and ankle lock AT THE SAME TIME. Mysterio breaks both parts of the hold up and Chavo pulls Angle to the floor. Rey dives on both of them and Benoit Germans Edge but Eddie comes in off the top to sunset flip Benoit, sending Edge flying in a German for two each. Eddie gets suplexed to the floor with his head smashing into the apron on the way down. FREAKING OW MAN!

Benoit rolls more Germans on Edge (Gee I wonder why he needed neck surgery five months after this) and Eddie hits the Frog Splash on Edge but Benoit hits the Swan Dive on Eddie. Angle Slam and Ankle lock to Eddie while Benoit Crossfaces Edge. Chavo hits Benoit with a belt and throws the belt to Angle. Benoit thinks Angle hit him and Mysterio dropkicks Chris into Angle. Angle and Rey go to the floor and Edge spears Benoit for the elimination. Absolutely amazing sequence there which NEVER STOPPED.

Angle and Benoit destroy Edge and Rey before leaving. They lay out Los Guerreros too for fun. Eddie vs. Edge keeps the match going and Eddie suplexes the Canadian down before it’s off to Chavo. Chavo pounds away on Edge as Los Guerreros double team. We get down to a much more standard tag team formula with Edge playing Ricky Morton. Edge finally comes back with a double clothesline and it’s off to Rey.

Things speed up again with Rey flying all over the place and hitting a headscissors to put Chavo down. Edge spears both guys down and launches Rey up to rana Eddie off the top. That’s another awesome sequence. There’s the 619 to Eddie but Chavo hits Rey in the back to break up the West Coast Pop. Eddie puts on the Lasso From El Paso (a Boston Crab/Sharpshooter hybrid) for the tap and the titles.

Rating: B+. This was a match that felt like it got hacked to death. If you give these guys another 15 minutes (the match ran 20) and take away the belt shots, the match gets a lot better. The first half, as in before the first elimination, is INCREDIBLE. The stuff after that though is good but standard. Still though, these guys were the future of the company and it was a good sign to see them. Combine that with three guys named Batista, Orton and Cena that had debuted earlier in the year and you’ve got the next five years of WWE.

The next few years would not be kind to Chavo as he would stick around the lower midcard in the Cruiserweight Title scene again until he got another new gimmick. Chavo would become Kerwin White, a man very proud of being a middle class white guy. If you don’t get why this bombed, you’re not paying close enough attention. Here’s a rare Kerwin White match from Unforgiven 2005 against Shelton Benjamin.

Shelton Benjamin vs. Kerwin White

 

White is Chavo Guerrero who is a golfer and I kid you not, a guy that is very proud of being a middle class white guy. His theme song is about picket fences and soccer moms. He would soon get a caddy named Nick Nemeth who is currently known as Dolph Ziggler. Kerwin’s catchphrase during this period: “If it’s not White, it’s not right.” I mean….WOW. Also, I kid you not, he’s fighting Shelton because Shelton isn’t white. Are you starting to get why people weren’t thrilled with this era?

 

Shelton rips the sweater off White and the beating is on for the blonde Guerrero. Yes he’s blonde here. Nothing going on to start until Shelton misses a shot and White goes after the knee. Kerwin hooks what we would call the Brock Lock and we intentionally cut to Spanish commentary for some reason. More leg work gets a two count and a Chavo Sucks chant. White charges into a Samoan Drop and both guys are down.

 

A slugout is won by Shelton who gets two on a backbreaker. Shelton’s leg is ok enough to go up now but he gets crotched. Even the announcers point out how stupid going up there was. Kerwin hits a superplex for two. There’s a half crab to eat up a few seconds. Shelton rolls through into a catapult and White grabs the golf club (wasn’t this a PG show?) but walks into Shelton’s T-Bone Exploder suplex for the pin.

 

Rating: C-. Shelton was awesome at this point and was probably on the roll of his life but would get lazy and stuck in the midcard forever. Not bad here but the White gimmick was just freaking horrible. I have no idea who thought it was a good idea but they need to be dragged outside and put into that gimmick themselves. That’ll teach them.

The gimmick would be short lived as Eddie would pass away in November of 2005, sending Chavo back to his basic gimmick of just being himself. Eventually Chavo would get into a LONG feud with Rey Mysterio with the two fighting on and off for years. Here’s one of their final matches from Summerslam 2007.

Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero

For some reason Rey’s torso is covered in silver paint. The fans are all over Chavo to start as you would expect. The heel goes right after the knee of course but Rey slips away before the damage can be done. They do the gymnastics routine out of a test of strength as the fans chant for Eddie. Rey’s paint is already coming off, making him look really stupid. Chavo tries to bend the knee around the ropes but is sent to the floor for a big dive from Mysterio.

Back in and Rey goes up but gets caught in the Tree of Woe which is similar to what hurt his knee in the first place. Guerrero goes right for the knee and asks him if he quits. Off to the Brock Lock (Chavo bends the knee around his neck) but Rey counters into a headscissors. Chavo stays on him though and hooks another leg lock until Rey FINALLY gets out with a kick to the head.

He tries for 619 but the leg gives out, allowing Chavo to put on a half crab. Mysterio finally gets to the ropes but the knee is still too hurt to follow up. This time it’s Chavo going up but getting pulled down into the Tree of Woe so Rey can go after the knee. The paint is entirely off Rey’s chest now, making it look like he’s been fixing up his house.

Rey hits a seated senton off the apron before hitting a hard kick to the head for two. Chavo catches a springboard moonsault press but gets countered into a tornado DDT for two. Chavo comes right back with a Gory Bomb for two followed by two of the Three Amigos. Rey spins out of the third and takes Chavo into the ropes for the 619 and the springboard splash for the pin.

Rating: C-. The match was ok but at the end of the day there was no doubt that Rey was winning at all. It wasn’t boring but I liked last year’s action more. The story this year was better, but the paint and the obvious ending didn’t do it any favors. Chavo doesn’t work that well as a heel whatsoever.

That’s about it as far as important stuff for Chavo in WWE. He has a run with the ECW Title while being part of La Familia, both of which went nowhere before having one of the worst feuds of all time against Hornswoggle. Chavo was little more than a lower card act and a jobber to the stars for the rest of his WWE run, lasting a few more years. He would join Indian promotion Ring Ka King and Lucha Libre USA which didn’t last long. Eventually he wound up in TNA in a tag team with Hernandez, who received a tag title shot at Bound For Glory 2012.

Tag Titles: Kazarian/Christopher Daniels vs. Hernandez/Chavo Guerrero Jr vs. AJ Styles/Kurt Angle

Angle and AJ come out separately. Wes Brisco is in the front row and I’d bet we’ll see him later. Daniels and Kaz are in orange and black to start jokes from Taz. Chavo and AJ start things off and in a strange visual, Angle and Hernandez are standing on the same side of the apron. Daniels and Kaz are chilling on the floor. This starts with the usual technical goodness you would expect from these two.

Off to Angle who stomps Chavo down in the corner and Chavo has some tape on his shoulder. Angle slams Chavo down on said shoulder and Daniels blind tags Kurt to come in and….scratch that as Angle stays in. Off to AJ vs. Hernandez with the big guy throwing AJ around and getting two off a splash. Kaz tags himself in to stomp on AJ but there’s the drop down/kick and it’s back to Kurt.

Chavo comes in to face Kaz and some good basic wrestling takes Kazarian down. Hernandez drops Kaz with a backbreaker and it’s back to Chavo to dropkick the freshly tagged in Daniels. AJ comes back in because we can’t have a PPV without Daniels vs. AJ right? A clothesline puts AJ down and it’s time for some pelvic thrusting. The champs hit a double team move with Daniels hiptossing Kaz into AJ for two.

Kaz puts on a full nelson of all things on Styles but a quick Pele takes Kaz right back down. There’s the hot tag to Kurt who beats up everyone in sight. He snaps off some suplexes and counters a sunset flip into an ankle lock on Daniels. There go the straps but Angle misses a charge in the corner and hits the post. Angle shrugs that off and suplexes Kaz onto Daniels for two.

Kaz comes back in with the slingshot DDT on Angle but Hernandez comes back in and takes out Kaz. Daniels smacks AJ in the face and there’s no one in the ring. Daniels dives onto Angle from the apron and there’s the REAL big dive from Hernandez to take everyone out. Kaz tries a rana off the top to Hernandez off the apron but Hernandez goes the wrong way and Kaz basically crashes on his shoulder in a SICK looking landing.

AJ gets the attention off Kazarian by hitting a BIG dive on the champs and Hernandez. Kaz is at least sitting up now. Chavo suplexes Angle over the top and back in as he rolls some suplexes. Angle Slam out of nowhere puts Chavo down and a double suplex takes SuperMex down as well. Kaz is back in with a clothesline to take Daniels down and the BME gets a VERY close two on AJ.

Chavo sends Kaz to the floor and hits another big dive to take him out. Angel’s Wings are broken up by Styles and the moonsault into the reverse DDT takes Daniels down. Hernandez actually tags in and hits a slingshot shoulder block followed by the Border Toss. Chavo hits a Frog Splash to give Hernandez (the legal man) the pin on Daniels and the titles.

Rating: B. This was a good match from these six as you would expect, but it didn’t really get close to the other matches that the teams have had before. That has to be expected though and this was certainly entertaining. All the dives were great, but man alive someone is going to get hurt badly from one of them one day. Daniels and Kaz losing makes sense as they’ve done almost all they can with the belts at this point.

Overall, Chavo is a guy who has talent but people are only going to be interested in his opponents instead of Chavo himself. Most of his career was spent working with either Eddie Guerrero or Rey Mysterio and more often than not, the feuds didn’t spark a lot of interest. Chavo’s matches were far better than his stories but he was never going to be a top star. While not in a major promotion at the moment, he’d be a valuable name for any indy company that needs a veteran.

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Thunder
Date: July 16, 1998
Location: Oakland Arena, Oakland, California
Attendance: 13,393
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Lee Marshall, Bobby Heenan, Tony Schiavone

I can’t believe I’m saying this but Hogan is one of the best things about WCW right now. He was evil again on Monday instead of being the guy who takes nothing seriously. That being said, he really doesn’t seem to mind that he’s lost the world title. His reaction on Monday was basically “Eh, I’ll get back to that when I have time.” That doesn’t do anything for the title but that never seemed to be a priority in WCW. Let’s get to it.

Apparently this is a three hour show. Oh freaking joy.

Speaking of three hours, weren’t we supposed to see Hogan vs. Goldberg in its entirety again on Monday? I guess not being able to remember a promise you made five days earlier is a universal problem in wrestling.

We open with a Nash interview from after Nitro went off the air Monday. He says he isn’t pleased with what Hall did and calls it strike two. It’s all Hogan’s fault of course, but Nash is going to have to knock some sense into Hall. Tenay is conducting the interview and spends most of it sucking up to the Outsiders because WCW now supports the Wolfpack I guess.

Konnan vs. El Dandy

Konnan raps on the way to the ring and sucks up to the Oakland crowd. Dandy is quickly taken down and stomped on a bit before he comes back with a clothesline. An abdominal stretch has Konnan in trouble but he dares to doubt El Dandy. Konnan flapjacks him down and it’s the 187 into the Tequila Sunrise for the easy win.

Road Wild ad.

Ultimo Dragon vs. Lizmark Jr.

This is going to be a long three hours. Dragon fires off the kicks to start and does his headstand in the corner before kicking Lizmark in the chest. Lizmark chops him a bit and gets a nice belly to back suplex to set up an abdominal stretch on the mat. Back up and a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gets two for Lizmark. The nitwit fans are booing this. A rollup and fallaway slam get two each on Dragon as this has almost been one sided. Lizmark’s Lionsault hits legs though and both guys are down. Back up and Lizmark tries a Samoan drop of all things, only to have Dragon land on his feet and hook the Dragon Sleeper for the win.

Rating: C. Better match than I expected here as Lizmark got to show off. Dragon is on his way out of the company at this point so maybe that’s why he was on defense so long out there. It wasn’t anything that was going to set the world on fire but I can think of worse ways to spend four and a half minutes.

The announcers talk about DDP and Hennig not happening last week but they’ll try to do it tonight instead.

Here’s Page to talk about how much he hates Hogan and his ego. He’s right here if Hogan wants to jump him, but tonight it’s Hennig that will feel the BANG. Short stuff from Page tonight.

The next Thunder isn’t for three weeks. I think that’s a Christmas miracle.

Public Enemy vs. Alex Wright/Disco Inferno

Rock cranks on Wright’s arm to start but gets backdropped out to the floor. He doesn’t seem all that hurt but Wright sends him back inside anyway. Rocco’s superplex attempt is countered into a front suplex off the top for two as Rocco still doesn’t seem that bothered. Off to Disco vs. Grunge with Inferno getting punched all over the ring. Wright walks into a tilt-a-whirl slam as Public Enemy throws in a table. Tokyo Magnum tries to come in for a save but gets crushed against the table. Alex uses the distraction to grab a neckbreaker on Grunge for the pin.

Rating: D+. Believe it or not this hasn’t been a horrible feud. There’s a nice idea with the goofy guys facing the brawlers and it’s actually working. The matches haven’t been anything of note but I haven’t been bored when watching them. That’s more than I can say about a lot of WCW matches and feuds.

Post match Meng comes out and destroys everyone in sight. Barbarian comes out to try and stop Meng but gets a Death Grip for his efforts. Meng destroys even more people.

Dean Malenko vows to get his hands on Jericho soon enough. Tony asks him about Arn Anderson helping him out at Bash at the Beach. Dean says he’ll talk to Arn before he leaves tonight.

Jim Duggan vs. Roadblock

A quick (work with me here) clothesline put the 400lb+ Roadblock on the floor but he elbows Duggan in the jaw back inside. The big man hits some forearms to the back like any good clubbing monster would before Duggan clotheslines him out again. Back in and the ten right hands in the corner have Roadblock in trouble but he grabs a bearhug to slow Duggan down. Jim breaks free, hits the Three Point Clothesline and drops Old Glory (knee drop) for the pin.

Rating: D. Shockingly watchable match but again, why did they need to have this match? Was there no one on the roster that needed a TV win? It’s like they just pick these names out of a hat like at Lethal Lottery. The match wasn’t even bad but it doesn’t need to exist given some of the people on this roster.

Bret Hart says he doesn’t mind if the fans don’t like him. They don’t matter and he’s already taken care of Flair, Benoit and Booker (complete with making fun of the way Booker speaks). No one is safe around here and he’ll take out anyone he wants.

Saturn vs. Kanyon

This should be good. Kanyon grabs two quick rollups for two each but Saturn grabs a quick belly to back suplex. Schiavone of course brags about the basketball match instead of talking about ANYTHING going on during the match. Lee Marshall of all people gets him back on track. Saturn fires off some kicks in the corner but gets caught in a neckbreaker to put both guys down.

We hit the chinlock from Kanyon followed by a hotshot for two more. A PerfectPlex gets two for Kanyon as does a slingshot elbow drop from the apron. Kanyon drives shoulders into Saturn’s ribs in the corner but misses a charging shoulder and gets rolled up for two. The fans want Arn and go WOO a lot. Saturn scores with a great looking superkick for two but walks into the Flatliner for the same result. The Moss Covered Three Handled Family Credenza gets yet another two for Kanyon but Saturn pops up and hits the Death Valley Driver for the pin.

Rating: C. This was more of a spot fest with both guys hitting one big move after another. As usual the story hasn’t gone anywhere yet but it was still entertaining stuff which is what this dull show has needed. Why couldn’t these guys get another five minutes and Roadblock’s match been cut?

Eddie Guerrero vs. Psychosis

The Chavo chants before the match already get on Eddie’s nerves and Psychosis uses the distraction to get a quick rollup for two. They trade rollups and counters to start until Eddie grabs a quick suplex to take over. Psychosis pops back up and kicks Guerrero in the head to send him outside. A nice plancha from the top takes Eddie out again and he’s kind enough to just stand there and wait on Psychosis to go up. Back in and Eddie grabs a quick shoulder breaker and starts in on the arm.

We get an actual hammerlock in a cruiserweight match. I don’t remember the last time I saw that. Eddie stays on the arm but misses a charge in the corner. Psychosis goes up and here’s Chavo, dressed like the Lone Ranger. Psychosis dives on him for no apparent reason before Eddie dives on both of them for a slightly more adequately explored reason. Back in and Psychosis hits a top rope hurricanrana and a gordbuster, only to have Chavo hit him with the stick horse. Eddie’s frog splash is good for the pin.

Rating: C. Chavo continues to entertain but I’m not sure where they’re going with the story at this point. They’ve kind of hit a wall as Eddie has taken his hair but Chavo doesn’t seem to mind. At least it’s fun stuff though which is more than Chavo had been doing before this whole thing started. Eddie is getting a nice push out of it too.

We get the Nash interview from earlier which leads us into Scott Hall with something to say. No survey since California is clearly Black and White country, so on to Nash. Apparently Nash is a big goof who wouldn’t help Hall when he had money troubles, so Hall turned to Hogan and Bischoff. Hall declares himself Medium Sexy the Nash Killer and that he’s sexier than ten movie stars. Again, not much here.

Scott Norton vs. Ciclope

Norton, officially in black and white, powerbombs him for the pin in 15 seconds.

Stevie Ray is here to explain why he has the TV Title. Apparently Booker was in his hospital bed and looked up at Stevie (“With those big brown eyes”) and told Stevie how great of a champion he was. Booker gave Stevie power of attorney and Ray has a hand written note to prove it. Booker even picked the opponent tonight.

TV Title: Stevie Ray vs. Damien

Another total squash with Ray just mauling him. A powerslam gets no cover and Damien makes the jobber comeback with chops and a dropkick. Stevie clotheslines him down and the Slap Jack retains the title.

Here are Hennig, Rude and Hall with something to say. Rude thinks Page is nothing more than a flash in the pan. Hennig things DDP stands for Dirtball Dallas Punk and complains that his bird is too sick to relieve himself on a picture of DDP. Konnan comes out for Wolfpack reasons, calls Hall a mark, slaps Hennig, and runs.

Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Juventud Guerrera

In a funny bit, Tenay talks about some Oakland A’s being here. Heenan: “Gehrig is here.” Tony: “Lou?” Heenan: “Al. He parks cars.” Feeling out process to start with Rey taking control of the arm and ducking an enziguri. Juvy chops away until Rey goes for a springboard dropkick but gets dropkicked out of the air. A suplex gets two for Guerrera and we hit the chinlock.

Back up and Mysterio gets two off a rollup before kicking Juvy in the back to take over. Now it’s Juvy heading to the apron and connecting with his springboard missile dropkick for two. They head up top with Juvy being punched out to the floor, setting up a BIG dive from Mysterio. Back in and Rey hits the ropes, only to get caught in the Juvy Driver for a very close two. The 450 is broken up and Rey sets for the West Coast Pop, only to have Bret Hart of all people come out with a chair for the DQ.

Rating: C+. Surprising ending aside, what else were you expecting from Guerrera vs. Mysterio? It’s good to see Rey getting to test his knee out against someone who can give him a run for his money. Juvy continues to be awesome but never seems to go anywhere as a result. Some things never change around here.

Both small guys are beaten down with the chair. Juvy gets a Sharpshooter and Mysterio is put in the figure four around the post. This is really the best thing they can come up with for Bret Hart?

Hugh Morrus/Barbarian vs. Marty Jannetty/Chris Adams

Oh you have got to be kidding me. Adams pounds on Morrus to start before bringing Marty in for a superkick. The crowd is clearly heading to the concourse during this. Everything quickly breaks down and Adams is sent to the floor, allowing Morrus to moonsault Jannetty for the pin. Another nothing match.

Post match Meng comes out and destroys people. They’re so strapped for ideas that they did the same low level angle twice in one night.

Here’s Dean Malenko who demands to see Arn Anderson face to face. Here’s Arn to the awesome Horsemen music but Mongo comes out before Dean can say anything. A LOUD We Want Flair starts up as Dean talks about Benoit being a close friend. Malenko talks about being in New Japan and getting to talk to Arn while he was on a tour. They got to know each other pretty well back then and they have a common work ethic. Anderson got Dean a job in WCW and Malenko never got a chance to thank him.

Dean says Benoit and Mongo believe in Anderson and Dean thinks Arn’s guidance could be what they all need. Malenko holds up the four fingers and that’s enough for Arn. He’s told them this once before and now he’s going to do it with some bass in his voice. You don’t just join the Horsemen. It’s a team you’re chosen for. Being a Horseman means wrestling all the time even when you don’t want to. It means wrestling when you bury your grandmother in the morning and when your son has burned a hole in his foot that you can fit your thumb in.

Dean hasn’t earned the right to hold up four fingers because he doesn’t understand it. Nobody has the fire in them like Arn does and he takes off his shirt. He wants to be out here but his neck won’t let him do it anymore. The Horsemen are over, so let them be over. Amazing stuff here from Anderson, even by his standards.

Curt Hennig vs. Diamond Dallas Page

Hall, Rude and Vincent come out with Hennig. Page goes into the crowd as usual but here’s Konnan before Page gets to the ring. We take a break and indeed it’s a tag match.

Diamond Dallas Page/Konnan vs. Curt Hennig/Scott Hall

Hennig starts with Konnan but it’s off to Page before any contact. They lock up and fight to the floor where Hennig slaps him in the back of the head. Back in and Page grabs a swinging neckbreaker. A second attempt sends Hennig running to the floor and it’s off to Hall vs. Konnan. Hall grabs the arm for the driving shoulders before slapping Konnan in the back of the head. That must be an AWA move.

Konnan fights up and shoves Hall down to slow the pace. Back up and Konnan grabs a quick X Factor before Hall gets punched back and forth like a pinball. Page comes in but can’t hit the Diamond Cutter but clotheslines Hall down to set up a Konnan chinlock. They get up again and Hall can’t catch a cross body. Instead he lifts Konnan up for a fallaway slam to take over. Off to Hennig for a knee lift before he suckers Page in.

Hall breaks up a hot tag attempt with an elbow to the back and puts on a reverse chinlock. Scott lets go of the hold and lets Konnan up before a double clothesline puts both guys down. Now it’s the hot tag to Page who punches both Hall and Hennig from corner to corner. Hall gets in a cheap shot though and Hennig drops Page with a right hand for two. A great dropkick and right hand both get the same and we take a break.

Back with Page pounding on Hennig in the corner before Hall sneaks in behind him for the fall away slam. Off to the abdominal stretch on Page’s bad ribs before it’s back to Hennig for more stomping. Hall comes back in for a clothesline and sleeper but Page counters into one of his own. Scott suplexes his way to freedom and both guys are down again. The double tag brings in Konnan vs. Hennig as everything breaks down. Rude gets in a cheap shot on Konnan and it’s a PerfectPlex for the pin as Page Diamond Cuts Hall on the floor.

Rating: C+. The match was fine but it was at the end of a very long show. They did the formula stuff here and that’s a good idea for old school guys like Hall and Hennig. It doesn’t really advance anything but it’s nice to see the factions at war actually in a match for a change. Decent enough stuff.

Overall Rating: D. This had its moments but it’s just WAY too long. Like I said, they had two Meng vs. Barbarian segments in the same show. Let that sink in for a minute. The show wasn’t completely horrible but there was no reason for this to be a three hour episode. It would have been much better had they given some of the matches more time, but for some reason they flew through everything instead of letting anything other than the main event develop.

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World War 3 1997
Date: November 23, 1998
Location: The Palace of Auburn Hills, Detroit, Michigan
Attendance: 17,128
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan, Mike Tenay

Last show in this series here but not the last chronologically. It’s the final show before Starrcade 97 and the bullet that killed WCW. Anyway, the feature match here is of course the battle royal with the winner getting a shot at SuperBrawl which would later be changed to Uncensored (why Souled Out wasn’t an option is anyone’s guess). This is from when this was the hottest company in the world so I’d expect a lot more energy here than the next year. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is of a pilot/soldier in a decimated war zone with a destroyed ring in it. This is interspersed with clips of the show from the previous two years. Bet that cost more than some wrestlers’ salaries.

After the announcers talk for awhile we’re ready to go.

Glacier/Ernest Miller vs. Faces of Fear

Miller and Glacier aren’t total jokes yet and the Faces of Fear (Meng/Haku and Barbarian) are monsters at this point of course. We brawl to start and Meng vs. Glacier opens us up officially. Glacier moves around as much as he can but his shots don’t mean much at all. Standing armbar goes on and it’s off to Miller. It’s so weird to see Miller all serious like this instead of the James Brown thing.

Miller hammers on Barbarian but the three time world karate champion can’t put down the Tongan. Back off to Glacier as we’re up to speed vs. power here, making this mostly awesome. Miller dives on Barbarian on the floor, using Meng as a springboard. That looked rather awesome indeed. Jimmy Hart distracts Glacier and Barbarian runs him over.

Back in the ring Meng backdrops Glacier into a powerbomb by Barbarian for two in a sweet spot. We get into a basic face in peril sequence with Glacier getting beaten down. Powerslam by Meng gets two. Off to Barbarian in the corner and since Dusty isn’t here, I’ll say it: THEY BE CLUBBERIN TONY!!! THEY BE CLUBBERIN!!!

Apparently Barbarian used to play rugby on the Isle of Tonga. Why in the world would Tenay know that? I get that he’s the Professor but dude, does Barbarian even speak English? Another powerslam by Meng gets two. Time for the nerve hold which is an old Tongan/Samoan/Savage standard. We hear a cool story about Meng being a bodyguard for the Emperor of Japan as this needs to end rather soon.

Elbow drop misses and Miller still can’t get tagged in. We finally get to the hot tag and Miller cleans house. He kind of reminds me of Tajiri actually but a bit taller. Kicks all around, including one to Jimmy Hart. It’s not like it matters though as the Tongan Death Grip ends Miller cold.

Rating: C-. I’ve seen far worse actually. Not particularly good but it was light years better than the 10 minute squash that we got the next year with Glacier in there. This wasn’t anything I’ll remember in about five minutes but it was still decent enough for an opener and that double powerbomb spot was cool. Not terrible.

TV Title: Disco Inferno vs. Perry Saturn

Saturn had won the title in his debut off of Disco so this is his rematch. There’s your backstory. Oh and Saturn is in the Flock. Disco is being serious at the moment and he got the TV Title because of it. Raven comes to the ring with Saturn despite sitting in the front row pre match. Raven says let the stretching begin. Saturn immediately takes Disco down and the Inferno is frustrated.

Tenay vaguely references ECW by calling it an other organization. Saturn runs over Disco with power. So he can’t hang with him on the mat or power and Tenay said Saturn can fly. What chance does Disco have here exactly? Disco sends him to the floor as we hear about how during his six week reign with the title he never got a clean pin. Wait are we supposed to buy him as a credible guy or not?

Heenan might have picked Saturn for the battle royal but it’s not entirely clear. Disco makes Saturn take a break and then gets his head knocked off by a boot and clothesline. Atomic drop puts Saturn back down as this is a weird kind of back and forth. Disco hammers away with a back elbow and fist drop for two.

You may not believe this, but Disco does something incredibly intelligent here. You know that spot where a guy comes off the middle rope and jumps into a boot with no possible move they could have had other than jumping into the boot? Disco does it here but avoids the boot. Granted the elbow he attempted missed but I like what I saw there. T-Bone suplex to Disco has Saturn in control again.

Saturn covers him time after time but can’t get the pin. Second rope moonsault misses and Disco, who doesn’t have a finisher, tries a bunch of stuff for two. Saturn gets a backslide but sits down with it so that it’s like a sunset flip/backslide hybrid. Never seen that before. Disco is crotched on the top rope and Saturn hits a middle rope clothesline to send both guys to the floor.

They more or less fell onto the apron with that so it wasn’t the best looking move in the world. Disco yells at the Flock and hits Chartbusters (Stunners) on various members over the railing, including one on the debuting Lodi. He can’t hit one on Van Hammer and Saturn uses his chance to drill Disco and take over. Back to the middle ring and Disco gets a neckbreaker for two. Top rope cross body hits but Saturn rolls though into the Rings of Saturn (double arm hook submission) for the submission to retain.

Rating: C-. Not bad here but there were some bad spots. Also I still don’t know if we’re supposed to take Disco seriously even in his more serious persona or not. They didn’t seem to have much of a plan out there but that was somewhat typical of a Saturn match. Not bad though.

Yuji Nagata vs. Ultimo Dragon

Nagata has Sonny Onoo with him and if Dragaon, Onoo’s former protégé, loses then he gets five minutes with Sonny. Dragon has a bad arm thanks to Nagata. Dragon is fresh off one of the least interesting feuds over a title you’ll ever see, trading it twice with Alex Wright. Nagata is a much bigger star in Japan and takes over early by going after the arm, but Dragon fights his way out of it.

Nagata heads to the floor and Dragon follows. Sonny fires in some kicks so Dragon tries a suplex which Nagata breaks up to take over. Dragon grabs a headlock and gets suplexed. Nagata is one of the least interesting guys I’ve ever seen. Whenever his matches are on I can’t get interested in him at all. Piledriver gets two for Nagata. He grabs a chinlock and shifts it into a sleeper. Then he makes it even more interesting by going BACK to the chinlock! WOW!!!

Another Piledriver gets two. So is the BIG FREAKING BANDAGE on his arm not a big enough target that you should work on the arm? Nagata kicks him and heads to the camel clutch, shifting over to the back now. After that gets broken up he FINALLY works on the arm with a Fujiwara Armbar. Let’s hit that chinlock/sleeper again because that arm work can’t last that long.

Belly to belly overhead suplex gets two. Dragon avoids a backdrop and kicks the tar out of Nagata. Some Facewashes in the corner have Nagata in big trouble. Pescado is almost caught by a kick but Dragon catches the kick and hits a Dragon Screw Leg Whip to take Nagata down on the floor. Top rope cross body to the floor puts Nagata down again.

Back in and Dragon goes up again. Suplex off the top by Nagata is blocked and Dragon adds a moonsault for two. Dragon tries a suplex but Nagata reverses. That reversal is reversed into the Dragon Sleeper but Sonny distracts. Dragon Rana gets two but Sonny puts Nagata’s foot on the rope. We then get one of the sloppiest finishes I’ve EVER seen. Dragon tries a belly to back suplex but seems to fall towards the ropes. Nagata’s foot hits Sonny and Nagata falls on top. Dragon’s shoulder was up and he was in the ropes but the referee counted to four (yes four) anyway. That had to be at least one botch.

Rating: D+. I’m not a fan of Nagata at all and this didn’t help my opinion of him. Terribly boring match with a bad finish and a total lack of psychology. Once Dragon got going in there towards the end it was an improvement but it didn’t make up for the previous eight minutes or so. Nagata continues to bore me.

 

Tag Titles: Blue Bloods vs. Steiner Brothers

The Blue Bloods are Dave Taylor (old English dude) and Steve Regal (yes that Regal). This was when the Steiners were tag champions but the Outsiders had their own belts. This would result in the temporary “Unified” tag titles. Ted DiBiase is managing them here. Scott vs. Taylor to start us off here. Scott isn’t that far away from turning heel and breaking up the team.

We hear about how awesome the Steiners are, including their two tag title reigns from another promotion (WWF) and how dominant they are. The Dudleys would more or less destroy every record they had but until they came along it was all Steiners. The British dudes get thrown around with ease and are sent to the floor to hide a bit. Rick vs. Regal now and it’s a USA chant.

Regal tries to use his technical stuff so Rick grabs his hand and cranks on it to take over. Well no one ever accused Rick of being a mental giant. Regal takes over for a bit but gets cocky and Rick gets a Fujiwara Armbar of all things to take him down. Off to Scott who gets that sweet belly to belly for two. STF goes on for all of two seconds and it’s back off to Rick.

He goes for the arm of Regal again but as Dave has the referee, Regal gets a finger to the eye to take over. And never mind as Rick gets a shoulder block and powerslam to take over again. Regal gets a knee to the back of Scott and pulls the rope down to send Scott outside. Taylor goes for the arm and it’s back to Regal. He hooks Scott in a leg lock and brings Taylor back in.

The Brits have used a lot of European uppercuts and every time they’ve put the Steiners down. Regal tries to speed things up and walks into a belly to belly by Scott, allowing for a tag to Rick. Down goes everyone and it all breaks down. Scott backdrops Taylor onto Regal and the Steiner Bulldog ends Regal to retain.

Rating: C-. Just an extended squash here. I don’t get why the vast majority of these matches have been on this show so far. I guess because we can’t have a battle royal go on for three hours. Either way this was more or less exactly what you would expect here. The Blue Bloods were more or less tag team jobbers so this didn’t have any heat on it at all.

JJ Dillon says Raven has 24 hours to sign a contract or he’s gone.

Raven vs. Scotty Riggs

Riggs is in an eyepatch due to Raven hurting him. Kidman, a member of the Flock, insists on Raven’s Rules, meaning No DQ. Raven has been trying to get Riggs to join the Flock, so what do you think is coming at the end here? Riggs jumps him and beats on Raven for awhile in the kind of offense you would expect from a guy that has no chance at all. Riggs gets a rollup for two as Raven can’t get much going.

Heenan makes blind jokes which are kind of funny. First of all he suggests moving the patch to the other eye. That’s actually rather smart when you think about it. Raven uses the shirt around his waist to choke away and we head to the floor. Riggs reverses and sends him into the steps and chokes with a cord. Tony says Raven is helpless, just as he pops up with a jawbreaker. I love it when Tony looks like an idiot, which means I love a lot in WCW.

The announcers say Scotty has done nothing since Bagwell and he broke up which makes me laugh for some reason. Raven gets a chair and hits him in the back with it a few times for some weak shots. Riggs gets the drop toehold into the chair as a reversal to break Raven’s momentum. Modified Van Daminator by Riggs gets two.

Riggs manages a bulldog onto the chair which looked either awesome or awful and I’m not sure which. Either way it gets two. And never mind as there’s the Evenflow DDT to kill Riggs dead. Raven wants a microphone instead though. There’s a second DDT as he says he feels Riggs’ pain and that it hurts Raven more than Riggs. Heenan: I don’t think so. Raven shouts about feeling the pain again and a third DDT has Riggs unconscious. The referee counts him out and it’s over.

Rating: D+. What was the point of this being on PPV again? For the big blowoff for Raven vs. Riggs? Weak match all around and Raven looked completely dominant even though he got beaten up. I think he would sign the next night but I’m not sure. Either way he would have Riggs in the Flock then and that’s about it.

Steve McMichael vs. Bill Goldberg

This is over Mongo’s Super Bowl ring that Goldberg stole at the previous PPV. Mongo comes out with a pipe Goldberg’s music hits and there’s no Goldberg. Mongo says this isn’t happening and says he can sneak up on people too. We go to the back and Goldberg is out cold. So no one noticed the big man in his underwear out cold on the concrete just behind the entry way? Mongo more or less gives an open challenge, resulting in this.

Steve McMichael vs. Alex Wright

Wright isn’t here because he wants to be but because Debra, Mongo’s estranged wife, brings him out and more or less makes his fight. Wright whips him with his jacket to start. Wright is from Germany so wouldn’t that be a foreign object? Mongo is like screw this and hammers away, sending Wright to the floor. He tries to leave but Debra more or less makes him come back.

Alex tries to fight and gets slammed down to the mat with ease. Mongo is barely breaking a sweat in this. Was there a reason they didn’t have Goldberg in this that I’m not getting? Debra’s voice is irritating to put it mildly. Wright takes over for a very little bit with chops but McMichael takes out the knee. Side slam sets up the Tombstone to end it. Total and complete squash squash and no rating here. Heenan asks Who’s Next for Mongo. Nah that’ll never catch on.

Cruiserweight Title: Eddie Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio

They’re coming off an absolute classic the previous month at Halloween Havoc. Eddie (not Eddy blast it!) is champion here. Also what is with the total lack of promos here? I think JJ had the only one so far. They start off with speed stuff to the shock of no one. Eddie is in gold tights and they’re really not working on him here. Rey gets that elevated snap mare to take Eddie down and it’s a stalemate.

The fans are all over Eddie here and his reaction is quite funny. Eddie ripped the mask off partially last time so we talk about that a bit here. Guerrero hits a German suplex and busts out some suplexes to take over. The problem here seems that they’re trying to have the match of the year rather than having a great match.

They fight towards the ropes and neither guy can take over. Hilo misses and Rey hits the floor. Both guys try dives but neither can hit them. Rey can’t get a sunset bomb so Eddie hits a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. Back in and Eddie goes up, only to get blocked by Rey. Superplex by Eddie takes Rey down but the Frog Splash misses. Eddie rolls through and Rey gets a rana for two.

Flapjack puts Rey down but Eddie can’t get up either. After some shots by Eddie he drops Rey over the top rope and spanks himself a bit. Eddie tries a sunset bomb which is reversed into a rana by Rey. Rey adds a front flip over the ropes to end Eddie. That and a moonsault gets in the ring. Eddie charges and is sent into the post but powerbombs Rey out of a rana to take over again.

Gory Special goes on by Eddie and Rey is in trouble. Rey counters that into a sunset flip for two. Leg lariat puts Eddie down again but Rey doesn’t cover for no apparent reason. They try something from the top and Rey falls off in what looked like a mild botch. Moonsault press gets two for the guy in the mask. Dropping the Dime gets no cover as Rey wants to go up again. West Coast Pop with a flip gets two as Eddie grabs the rope. Awesome looking move. Rey tries to run at Eddie who is on the corner but Eddie gets a hot shot to block it. Frog Splash ends it.

Rating: B. Good match but their match the previous month gave them WAY too much to live up to. Naturally this was still great as their matches always would be. Not a classic but worth watching if you like these two. There were some botches in there and they were trying to live up to the previous month which never works at all.

Ad for Starrcade. Remarkable that they managed to screw that up, it truly is.

US Title: Ric Flair vs. Curt Hennig

Hennig had turned on Flair and the Horsemen at Fall Brawl, slamming Flair’s head in the door. He won the US Title soon thereafter and more or less hasn’t looked back since. This is Flair’s revenge match rather than for the title. It’s also No DQ and Hennig brings a chair with him. The referee gets rid of the chair which is kind of pointless but whatever. Hennig is wearing a Syxx shirt for no apparent reason.

Curt stalls like a Memphis man but gets caught on the floor and Ric hammers away. This is the last match before the battle royal too. We hit the crowd with Flair dominating. This is your usual brawl in the crowd with various punches and eye rakes along with people being rammed into objects. Flair is rammed into the railing as Curt dominates for awhile.

Back into the ring and Hennig chokes away with a cord and we go back to the floor. We hear about Flair playing football at the University of Minnesota which isn’t something you often hear about. Flair goes up top and drops a double axe onto Hennig into the railing by the throat but he might have hurt his ankle. Flair chops away as we talk about the battle royal with the various countries etc that are going to be here for the match. Good to know that a bunch of people we don’t know will be competing here.

Back into the ring (again) and the referee got poked in the eye by Hennig apparently instead of letting him count three. Hennig was covering Flair which means it was even stupider. He works on the leg with Flair losing his mind as usual of course. Heenan says you can forget the Figure Four now. Why do I not believe that in the slightest?

He drops a leg between Flair’s legs as Flair’s ankle is still hurt. Modified Indian Deathlock goes on by Hennig and he gets two on it as Flair is laying there. Ric fights out of it and gets a chopblock as the crowd is way into him, or at least his wooing. Snap mare puts Hennig down and drops the knee. After some right hands Flair goes up. Take a guess as to how this goes. Just take a guess.

They chop it out with Hennig easily getting the best of it, resulting in a Flair Flop for two. We slug it out in the corner a bit more with Flair tossing Hennig into the corner where Curt is crotched on the post as is his custom. Hennig drops low to avoid a chop as it’s Flair in control again. They ram heads though and both go down for a bit. Belly to back gets two for Flair.

To change the pace a bit, Hennig chops away in the corner. They’re in a different ring now also. Flair Flip in the corner and we go outside again. Scratch that as just Flair does as Hennig chills in the ring a bit which is probably pretty smart. They fight a bit on the floor with Hennig in control again. Flair sends him into the railing and both guys are down again.

Flair suplexes him back into the ring but that also only gets two. This is at about 15 minutes now and probably needs to end very soon. Flair gets a chair as I had forgotten this was a No DQ match. It gets set up in the ring and Flair crotches him on it and kicks the chair into the knee. Flair rams the knee with the chair and brings the belt into the ring. Figure Four goes on but the belt that is RIGHT NEXT TO HENNIG goes into Flair’s head and it’s over. Weak ending to say the least.

Rating: D+. This was WAY too long. This is nearly 18 minutes long and I legitimately forgot about the No DQ aspect of it for a very long time. I’m not sure what they were going for here as Flair is made to look like a guy that can’t get revenge in a match where he’s supposed to be dirty. Not a great match at all and very boring and repetitive as can be here.

World War 3

Chris Adams, Brad Armstrong, Marcus Bagwell, The Barbarian, Chris Benoit, Bobby Blaze, Booker T, Ciclope, Damien, El Dandy, Barry Darsow, Disco Inferno, Jim Duggan, Fit Finlay, Héctor Garza, The Giant, Glacier, Johnny Grunge, Juventud Guerrera, Chavo Guerrero, Jr., Eddy Guerrero, Scott Hall, Curt Hennig, Prince Iaukea, Chris Jericho, Lizmark, Jr., Lex Luger

Dean Malenko, Steve McMichael, Meng, Ernest Miller, Rey Misterio, Jr., Hugh Morrus, Mortis, Yuji Nagata, John Nord, Diamond Dallas Page, La Parka, Stevie Ray, Lord Steve Regal, The Renegade, Rocco Rock, Randy Savage, Silver King, Norman Smiley, Louie Spicolli, Rick Steiner, Scott Steiner, Super Calo, Squire David Taylor, Ray Traylor, Último Dragón, Greg Valentine, Villaño IV, Villaño V, Vincent, Kendall Windham, Wrath and Alex Wright

What you might notice is that there are only 59 names there, so yes it’s time for shenanigans. As far as people you might not know, the only one that pops off the page to me is John Nord, who is more famous as the Berzerker. The introductions are odd as they say the wrestlers can go from ring to ring. What sense does that make?? Also once we get down to five people per ring we go to the middle. So if they get down to five in a ring and the other rings aren’t yet we just stop? See why this match tended to suck? The rules rarely made sense. Just have a freaking battle royal. How hard is that to accomplish?

As usual the entrances take about 5 minutes. They seem to be a bit faster this year though, mainly due to some people coming out in groups. The Giant is the defending champion and has a broken hand here. There’s an NWO member missing let the confusion begin. The missing one is apparently Kevin Nash who might be out with a knee injury.

The bell rings and we immediately go split screen, meaning YOU CAN’T SEE ANYTHING!!! WCW didn’t get this through their heads until the final year when they just didn’t film everything in every ring, like the intelligent people would suggest. Let’s get this over with. Lizmark Jr. and Disco Inferno plus anyone else Giant touches are gone. He must have gotten four people at a time. Louie Spicolli and a Villano are out.

La Parka is out. Expect a lot of “so and so” is out, just like Norman Smiley. Public Enemy goes after Meng and Grunge is put out. Ring 2, the Giant’s ring, is emptying quickly. DDP just walks into another ring. Scott Hall puts out El Dandy. I guess Hall didn’t doubt him. The NWO is in ring 1. Bobby Blaze is gone. Ring 2 has like 30 people in it. Or is that 3? The announcers say 2 and the graphic says 3. Whatever man. It’s in the middle.

Graphic now says 2. Flair isn’t here either apparently. Who replaced him I wonder since they made it clear he was an entrant during his match. Stevie Ray hangs on with a rake to the eyes. We’ve more or less stopped checking the other rings. Brad Armstrong is gone. Silver King is gone. Damien, a luchador, is thrown out. DDP and Wrath go at it but Wrath hangs on.

DDP tosses Prince Iaukea. Nagata is out so the match is less boring now. Wrath and Renegade are gone and fight up the aisle. No idea how many people are left at the moment. Ring 1 is rather empty now with maybe 7 people left and all of the NWO in still. Jericho is out. Hall winds up hanging on by one hand but the NWO runs in for the save to keep him in.

Greg Valentine is gone. Giant’s hand is killing him so Mortis and Duggan double team him. The people keep switching rings so you can’t tell who is where and who is left as you think they’re eliminated but they’re in a different ring. Most annoying indeed. Ring 3 is mostly empty now while ring 1 is a lot more full now. Harlem Heat beats on Chris Adams. Adams is gone but tries to sneak back in ala his most famous student: Steve Austin.

Ray Traylor (Big Boss Man) chokes Savage as Finlay is gone. Page and Benoit fight to the apron but both get back in. We’re roughly halfway done here as Dave Taylor is gone. Page and Malenko put I think Benoit out. Yep that was him. Miller puts Malenko out. Ring 3 seems to have Meng, Giant, Alex Wright and Mortis. Duggan is out to some booing. Miller is gone.

Leave it to the WCW cameras to focus on Giant’s hand. That’s all you see in the entire ring. Barbarian goes out and McMichael is also in ring 3. Rey puts Eddie out and gets ganged up on by the NWO who finally gets him out. Traylor is gone as is Darsow. Wait Mysterio pulled a John Morrison/Shawn Michaels and is hanging on to the apron! Mongo is out as are Wright and Mortis. Giant and Meng are the only ones left in that ring. Luger, Harlem Heat, DDP and Rick Steiner are in another ring and the NWO remain in the other.

Stevie Ray is out so we have ten left I think. Giant DROPKICKS Meng out. That was incredible and he wins the ring. Ok so it’s Vincent, Hall, Savage, Bagwell, Hennig, DDP, Rick Steiner, Luger and Booker T. The NWO won’t change rings and say come over here. They beat up the referee who says go to the other ring. Giant chills in the ring while the other four change to the NWO ring.

Ah there’s Giant so they’re all in the ring closest to the entrance because clearly the most fans can see them there right? Diamond Cutter to Vincent and a HUGE pop. Giant rolls Vincent out to get our first NWO guy out. Booker is out via someone we didn’t see as is Rick Steiner. Bagwell talks to the camera so Giant rams Bagwell and Savage’s heads together.

Luger hammers on Hennig on the second rope and doesn’t get tossed. Luger wakes up and hammers on people but gets jumped by the NWO. Giant comes over and puts out Bagwell, Hennig and Luger, leaving us with Savage, Giant, Hall and DDP. There’s a decent midcard tag match in there somewhere. Savage fights Page while Hall gets beaten up by the Giant. Giant slams Hall instead of throwing him out.

Savage wants an elbow to DDP but Giant stands in front of him. Savage, the crazy man that he is, jumps anyway and gets caught. He doesn’t get tossed though but takes a Diamond Cutter. Giant won’t let him get tossed though because he wants to chokeslam him. Savage is more or less dead and is tossed with ease to get us to three. The next year it would be the same three but with Nash instead of Giant.

More or less it’s a handicap match with Hall vs. Giant/DDP. Hall heads to another ring which is pretty smart actually. He does the point and here comes….no one as the NWO music starts and ends. Hogan’s music kicks on and is here now instead. So apparently Hogan, the WORLD CHAMPION, is #60, being allowed to skip 25 minutes of the match to potentially win a title shot against….himself? There are 7 minutes left so let’s just go with it.

We get a tag match now with Hogan fighting Giant and Hall vs. DDP. Ok so during Hogan’s two minute or so long intro, did Giant and DDP just stand there instead of going after Hall? Six minutes left so I don’t particularly care here. The fans want Sting as the NWO starts dominating. Hogan slams Giant to a big pop. Hall is sat on the top rope by Giant as DDP is crotched on the top rope.

Bear hug to Hall as Sting rappels from the ceiling, somehow about 10 inches taller and with darker hair. Hogan eliminates himself to run from Not-Sting and Not-Sting hits Giant with the bat to eliminate him as I guess DDP went out somewhere. Not-Sting points the bat at Hall as the fans chant Nash, having basic intelligence. The NWO celebrates to end this stupid, stupid match. Hogan gives DDP a Diamond Cutter to take us to the credits. Yes WCW had credits.

Rating: F+. Where do I even begin? Awful in every sense of the word with nothing making sense and the whole thing being a disaster. The switching of the rings thing made it virtually impossible to know who was where. The ending was just idiotic as Hogan apparently can just walk into a match he’s not a part of and has no business being involved in as he’s competing for a shot at something he already has. Nash made things look stupid and the whole thing was just a mess from start to finish. Also the triple camera didn’t help either.

Overall Rating: D-. Just a terribly dull show with nothing going on at all that was worth seeing. Rey vs. Eddie is good but it’s got nothing on the previous match they had at the last show. This was a very boring show overall as it was clear that Starrcade was all set in stone already. Not a good show in any sense of the word and boring beyond belief. BIG pass here.

 

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Thunder
Date: July 2, 1998
Location: Columbus Civic Center, Columbus, Georgia
Commentators: Lee Marshall, Bobby Heenan, Tony Schiavone

We’re getting closer to Bash at the Beach and the card is starting to fill out a bit more. The hype machine around the NBA match calmed down a bit on Nitro and hopefully that follows through tonight. On another note though, a major announcement is happening tonight which is going to change a lot of things in WCW very soon. Let’s get to it.

The announcers welcome us to the show and talk about how amazing Bash at the Beach will be while recapping the ending to Monday’s show.

Here’s Jericho with a sign saying Conspiracy Victim. Jericho asks ring announcer Dave Penzer what town we’re in and still gets it wrong anyway. He knows everyone is here tos ee their role model and their paragon of virtue and here he is. The WCW offices wanted to put him on last tonight but he couldn’t make his fans wait that long.

Jericho has to face Dean Malenko at Bash at the Beach, but is he really someone you want to see with a belt around his waist? Dean Malenko isn’t the man you think he is. Ultimo Dragon has a concussion due to Dean attacking him on Monday, so tonight Jericho is going to face someone we haven’t seen in six months. It’s going to be a five star classic that all the sheet readers can go crazy over (his words) in the vein of Moby Dick vs. Captain Ahab. If this guy wins he’ll get a title shot at Bash at the Beach: Rey Mysterio Jr!

Chris Jericho vs. Rey Mysterio Jr.

If you’re familiar with Jericho, you should know what’s coming already. It’s a guy that stands about 4’8 and must weigh 200lbs. Jericho easily shoves him down as the fans are all over Jericho for this. Mysterio comes back with a dropkick but gets suplexed down for a cover, only to have Jericho intentionally roll Mysterio on top of him for the pin and the title shot.

Jericho is stunned, yes STUNNED I say, that he lost and declares Mysterio Jr. the #1 contender. He continues to be the most entertaining thing in the entire company.

Here’s Giant, now complete with Kane style pyro from the four corners of the ring, with something to say. He asks for a moment of silence while he delivers words from the almighty Hollywood Hogan. Hollywood asked Giant to come out here to let them know that he (Giant) is on the warpath. Goldberg and Kevin Greene need to get ready for the beating of their lives at Bash at the Beach. That brings him to the Red and Black, who are all cocky backstage. If they’re that arrogant, why not send out Lex Luger to face Giant tonight? Very simple promo here but it did everything it needed to do.

Doc Dean vs. Stevie Ray

Dean is a small British guy who never did anything in America. Stevie pounds him into the corner and hits a World’s Strongest Slam for two. Dean is sent to the floor for a few moments before Stevie hits the Slap Jack (lifting Pedigree) for the easy pin.

Post match here’s Chavo on his horse to talk to Stevie about his family problems. Chavo: “Do you know how to play Monopoly?” Before Stevie can answer, Chavo talks about how similar they are but apologizes to grandma for all of Eddie’s losses as of late. Chavo says Stevie is sorry to grandma for Booker as well but Stevie shoves Guerrero down. That’s fine with him as long as Stevie doesn’t take his horse. It’s good to see Chavo branching out.

British Bulldog/Jim Neidhart vs. Public Enemy

Before either team comes out, Disco Inferno and Alex Wright dance down the aisle. Disco says everyone is here to see them dance but Public Enemy interrupts. Rocco says they’re not here for a fight but thinks the people here might like to see a dance party. Am I watching Raw from 2012 or Thunder? The dance contest is on but Wright and Disco quickly bail and we take a break.

Back with Neidhart and Bulldog coming out for the actual match. Rocco and Neidhart get us going with Anvil hiptossing him down and quickly tagging in the Bulldog. Rock is sent to the floor for a breather and comes back in to take Neidhart into the Public Enemy corner. Off to Grunge As the scrapping style offense begins. A double elbow gets two on Neidhart but he fights over for the tag to Bulldog. Everything breaks down and here are Wright and Disco to beat down Grunge and Neidhart. They pick up the table in the ring as Bulldog is powerslamming Rocco, only to drive him through the raised table for the double DQ.

Rating: D-. This was an angle instead of a match but it didn’t work for the most part. It’s the most interesting thing Neidhart and Bulldog have done in a long time but that doesn’t make it anything special. Wright and Disco might be the best thing that could happen to these guys though as there’s nothing interesting about the same styles fighting each other over and over.

It’s time for the big announcement. JJ Dillon comes out and says he loves his job on days like this. After meeting with the executive committee all day, it has been determined that Hollywood Hogan will defend his title against GOLDBERG on Nitro in Goldberg’s hometown of Atlanta.

To this day I do not understand why this wasn’t on pay per view. Yes it was going to be in front of the biggest Nitro crowd ever, yes a lot of executives were going to be there, yes it was a huge match, but Goldberg vs. Hogan could have headlined Starrcade. The best guess I can come up with is they were that desperate to win a night in the ratings, but if they threw away millions and millions of dollars for a one night win, they deserve to go out of business.

If nothing else, hype the match up for a month or more instead of the four days they gave it. That might even be worse than putting it on Nitro. They can spend the better part of a month hyping up a one off tag match but the future of the company’s passing of the torch moment gets four days? I know the NBA match made a ton of money, but I find it hard to believe it made as much as Goldberg’s entire title run combined. It’s a very questionable way of getting to the match and I still don’t get it entirely.

Raven talks about making all of the Flock members feel worthwhile.

Kidman vs. Saturn

Fast start with Saturn flipping Kidman to the mat and taking him down with a spinwheel kick. The announcers ignore the match but it’s understandable this soon after an actual major announcement. An overhead belly to belly suplex puts Kidman over the top and Saturn chases Lodi for fun. A clothesline puts Kidman down again but Saturn’s suicide dive hits a chair instead of Kidman to change momentum.

After a quick chinlock Kidman gets two off a facebuster. Saturn comes back with a clothesline and a small package for two, only to be dropkicked right back down. Off to another chinlock by Kidman which is quickly let go so he can stomp on Saturn again. Saturn avoids a charge in the corner and the announcers speculate what a title change would mean for the PPV.

Kidman comes right back with a sitout spinebuster but gets crotched while going up for the Seven Year Itch. A superplex brings Kidman down again but Saturn has to superkick Lodi down. Kidman walks the corner for a bulldog but Saturn sweeps his legs out for another near fall. The Death Valley Driver is enough to pin Kidman a few seconds later.

Rating: C+. Nice match here as Saturn continues to look awesome in the ring. At this point it would have been easy to see him as someone with potential in the future for WCW. He’s having consistently good matches and promos complete with a good look. What more can you ask for out of a guy? Kidman was quite good here as well, mixing up the high flying with some basic stuff to keep him from being one dimensional.

Saturn challenges Raven for a match.

We look back at Benoit and Anderson’s talk last week with Anderson saying the Horsemen are done.

Mongo talks about wanting the Horsemen back. We get some clips from NFL Hall of Fame coach Mike Ditka talking about how awesome Mongo is. McMichael tells Anderson to put the team together again and watch what happens.

We see Giant chokeslamming Luger from last week.

Brian Adams vs. Bobby Blaze

Blaze tries a quick hiptoss but gets taken down by a big suplex instead. Naturally the announcers focus on this match but ignored the good Saturn vs. Kidman match. A knee to the head puts Blaze down for two but he comes back with a spinwheel kick. Not that it matters as Adams catches him in a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker and an over the shoulder backbreaker gets the pin. Total squash.

Raven comes out almost immediately and accepts Saturn’s challenge. He talks about giving Saturn a bloody nose in sixth grade and how he never thought Saturn would turn on him. Also, Kanyon is officially getting a break while Raven deals with Saturn.

TV Title: Fit Finlay vs. Booker T

Booker is defending. Finlay jumps him before the bell like any good heel would do by firing off a series of European uppercuts. They head outside with Booker being rammed into various objects as this has been one sided so far. Booker is dropped throat first across the barricade for a two count inside. Finlay keeps pounding away on him and sends Booker into the corner but the champion comes out with him spinning sunset flip for two.

Finlay will have none of this offense from Booker and stomps him down again, only to have Booker come up with the Harlem sidekick to get a breather. The running forearm and a side slam get two each for the champion but Finlay uppercuts him down again. After some choking from the floor, Finlay kicks him in the face, only to get caught in a belly to back suplex. The announcers are actually into the match surprisingly enough. Booker is tossed outside and Finlay calls for the tombstone, only to turn around and get caught by the missile dropkick for the pin.

Rating: C. Not bad but this is another match we’ve seen a few times already. Finlay deserved a rematch for the title though so it’s understandable that we saw this again. The match wasn’t bad at all and was what Booker needs to get back to: having solid matches and winning from behind to keep the title.

Post match Booker says he’s coming for Bret until Stevie Ray says Booker needs to take care of business. triggering an argument between the brothers.

Here’s Chavo with a cardboard box. He sets the box up in the ring on a stick with a piece of twine around the stick. The words Acme Eddie Trap are written on the side and Chavo puts what looks like a burrito under the box. Chavo: “Be very very quiet. I’m hunting Eddies.” He pulls out a toy bow and arrow and says “here Eddie Eddie Eddie.”

Eddie comes out and moves the stick before hiding. Chavo looks under the box but doesn’t find Eddie. “I think I need a bigger box.” Eddie grabs Chavo and gives him a brainbuster on the floor before beating him with the burrito. For some reason there are scissors at ringside and Eddie cuts off some of his nephew’s hair until security takes him away. This was uh…..interesting shall we say.

Konnan vs. Kanyon

Konnan pounds away to start but Kanyon shoves him back and sweeps Konnan’s legs to get us to an early stalemate. Here’s the Flock on the ramp to watch the match, even though Raven says he was giving Kanyon a break. Kanyon grabs the Moss Covered Three Handled Family Credenza and a fallaway slam for two each as the Flock watches from ringside. They trade rollups for a few two counts each until Konnan botches a headscissors attempt.

The Flock finally gets Konnan’s attention, allowing Raven to sneak in for an Evenflow to Kanyon. Man, if you can’t trust drugged out cult leaders who speak in nothing but poetry, who can you trust? Konnan doesn’t see this and puts the unconscious Kanyon in the Tequila Sunrise for the win.

Rating: D+. This was a rather sloppy match with several botches throughout. It wasn’t quite clear who was to blame for most of them but given how crisp Kanyon usually, putting the blame on Konnan would seem to be a safe bet. The Flock getting the better of Kanyon is something new for a change so at least they’re moving forward a bit.

Post match the Flock goes after Kanyon and Konnan comes back to try for a save, only to get beaten down as well. Luger comes out for the real save and clears the Flock out before calling out the Giant for the main event.

Lex Luger vs. Giant

Luger pounds away with right hands but Giant shoves him away and clotheslines Luger down. A splash gets two on Luger and Giant slows things down with his big man offense. Maybe all the cigarettes are taking their toll? Giant hits a LOUD chop in the corner and pounds away on his back. We hit the chinlock for a bit but Luger comes back with a jawbreaker to stun the big man. Luger hits his clotheslines and the forearm to set up the Rack but the Black and White comes in for the DQ. Nothing match.

Konnan gets beaten down as well until the Flock comes back in to go after Luger, triggering a three way brawl to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This didn’t work for me for the most part with the entertaining parts being overshadowed by the uninspired stuff later in the night. It was nice to have something new for the announcers to harp on for most of the show and it’s even nicer that it’s something that will matter after Bash at the Beach. This show was mostly about the midcard though, which is something that’s been needed lately.

 

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Survivor Series 2004
Date: November 14, 2004
Location: Gund Arena, Cleveland, Ohio
Attendance: 7,500
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s another year and the main thing that has changed is a few people rising up the card. For instance, Cena and Batista are about six months away from taking over the company while Orton is currently the top face on Raw, feuding with who else but HHH. Other than that we’ve got JBL as world champion which was pretty dreadful stuff. Hopefully this is more inspired than last year. Let’s get to it.

We open with a video about the seventeen years this show has run already.

The set looks cool here as it’s made of six screens which I guess will act like the Tron tonight. That’s the annoying thing about WWE today: all of the shows look the same.

Cruiserweight Title: Spike Dudley vs. Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero vs. Billy Kidman

Spike is defending and is a heel here. This is one fall to a finish. Kidman hurt Chavo on a Shooting Star Press and seemed to be proud of it, which resulted in a heel turn for him. The other good thing here is that they don’t have to tag. That’s always a waste of time in these things as you just wait for things to break down. Kidman and Spike form a quick alliance, only to have Kidman dropkick the champ out to the floor.

Rey sends Kidman to the floor and it’s off to Rey vs. Chavo who are apparently friends at this point. Oh please, like these two could EVER get along. Rey spins Chavo around with a headscissors before Spike sends Rey into the corner and stomps away while screaming. Chavo comes back in and a double clothesline puts himself and Spike down. With Kidman on the apron, Rey hits a rana to send him out to the floor in a cool looking spot.

Back in and Rey tries the sitout bulldog on Chavo but Guerrero throws him onto Kidman in a seated senton. Chavo dives on both of them, leaving Spike standing ta….short actually. Anyway the champ dives on all of them but they step aside to let him crash. Chavo finally gets his hands on Billy back in the ring but Spike comes back in to break up a pinfall attempt.

Rey misses a moonsault over Spike’s head and gets thrown to the floor as a result. We get a Tower of Doom with everyone minus Rey involved, so Rey comes in and tries to steal a pin. Rey charges at Kidman but gets caught in a BK Bomb (Sky High) for two but Chavo breaks up the Shooting Star. Spike hits a running headbutt to Rey’s ribs but the Dudley Dog is broken up. 619 hits Spike but Billy breaks up the West Coast Pop. Chavo hits the Gory Bomb on Spike but Kidman hits a slingshot legdrop on Chavo. Rey takes out Kidman and Spike steals the pin on Chavo to retain.

Rating: B-. Not a great match or anything here but it was fine for an opener. Rey was insanely popular still but Spike keeping the title was a great way to tick off the fans. There’s nothing wrong with a heel winning, as long as the opener fires up the crowd, which this did. Good choice.

Heidenreich is getting fired up by Heyman when Paul goes to get his jacket. Snitsky, another creepy heel of the day, comes in. He says he likes Heidenreich’s poetry and Heidenreich likes what Snitsky does to babies. There’s WAY too much deep breathing here. By the way, this was almost who Taker and Kane fought at Mania before the company woke up and stuck Orton against Taker instead.

Intercontinental Title: Shelton Benjamin vs. Christian

Shelton is defending but the Waterproof Blonde version of Christian’s theme makes him far more awesome. Shelton is at the point in his career when he’s about to get on one of the biggest rolls in years but it never went anywhere past the IC Title. The champ cranks on the arm to start before they head to the mat. Keeping in mind that Shelton was a legit All-American wrestler, he’s just fine being on the mat with Christian.

Christian cranks on the arm but Shelton drops to the mat and immediately nips up which looked great. It didn’t do anything but it looked great. Christian talks trash and gets punched in the face for his efforts. Shelton skins the cat before hitting a great looking springboard clothesline for two. A HARD chop slows Benjamin down and Christian talks some more trash. Shelton counters a monkey flip by casually landing on his feet and grabs an Oklahoma Roll for two.

We head to the floor for a quick distraction by Tomko but Christian gets punched in the face instead. Tomko tries to cheat again and this time the distraction is enough to let Christian get in a shot. Why that creepy little bas…..never mind. A cross body gets two for Shelton but Christian immediately puts him back down with a neckbreaker. Off to a chinlock (Tomko: “BREAK HIS NECK!”) by Christian and he launches Benjamin to the floor as he tries to break the hold.

Shelton comes back with a hard whip into the corner to put Christian down. A Russian legsweep gets two for the champ as does a slingshot reverse suplex (called a reverse fisherman’s suplex by JR for some reason). Benjamin misses a Stinger Splash and gets caught in a reverse DDT for two. Tomko slides the belt in (hitting the referee in the foot in the process) but Shelton kicks Christian in the face.

The referee sees Christian holding the belt, which lets Benjamin hit a top rope clothesline for two. As the belt is being put out, Tomko kicks Benjamin in the face for two. The Exploder Suplex (a snap floatover T-Bone suplex which is Benjamin’s finisher) is countered but Benjamin kicks Tomko down. The Unprettier is countered into the Exploder for the pin to keep the title on Benjamin.

Rating: B. I really got into this match at the end even though Christian didn’t have much of a chance at winning. The Tomko and belt stuff didn’t help anything but they had to try to slow Shelton down a bit. Benjamin was in the beginning of a very long run with the belt that would last until June, which I think was the longest reign in about six years.

Really good match here as Christian put Shelton over strong. There’s a reason this guy basically had the world title waiting for him on a plate whenever he stepped up enough to take it, but that never happened for various reasons. Namely he just stopped trying and coasted on his reputation, but that’s another story.

Angle complains to Edge about something Edge wrote in his book about Angle. Kurt makes fun of Edge for never winning the world title. Just wait another fifteen months or so Kurtski. They trade some insults before Kurt leaves and runs into Eugene. Eugene lists off (slowly) some of Angle’s accomplishments before singing the You Suck version of his theme song.

Team Angle vs. Team Guerrero

Kurt Angle, Carlito Caribbean Cool, Luther Reigns, Mark Jindrak

Eddie Guerrer, John Cena, Rob Van Dam, Big Show

Eddie and Angle have been feuding since Wrestlemania, Carlito debuted and beat Cena for the US Title before injuring Cena in a nightclub (or having someone do it. The attacker was never revealed I don’t think but it might have been Carlito’s buddy Jesus. Make your own jokes because Cena destroyed Jesus at Armageddon), Show is feuding with Reigns and Jindrak and Angle for shaving his head, and Van Dam is there as a warm body.

Before the bell, Cena chases Carlito and Jesus to the back and gets in a brawl with them. Carlito and Jesus steal a car and speed away, which is an elimination apparently. Back at ringside there’s a big brawl until Show (on a bad ankle) pulls Jindrak into the ring. Here’s Cena back to the ring to make it 4-3. Off to Van Dam who hits a spin kick before it’s off to Eddie for the slingshot hilo, followed by Rolling Thunder from Van Dam.

Eddie suplexes Jindrak down and armdrags Reigns as he headscissors Jindrak in a cool move. Angle comes in to stop his team’s bleeding but it’s quickly back to Reigns for a bunch of backbreakers for two. Off to Jindrak for a full nelson but Eddie sends him into the buckle. Eddie dives for the corner but Angle literally tackles Guerrero to break it up. Kurt hits a belly to belly before bringing in Reigns for more stomping.

Off to a chinlock from Jindrak but Eddie eventually grabs a jawbreaker to escape. Angle again blocks the tag and puts on a front facelock. One thing to note here: the entire time the hold is on, Cena is reaching out for a tag and encouraging Eddie. It doesn’t mean much, but it helps things from getting really boring. Little things like that can make a big difference. Watch guys like Rock and Hogan when they’re on the apron in tag matches. They’re ALWAYS doing something, even if it’s minor like clapping. It can make a difference.

Jindrak comes in but Eddie knocks him away and it’s off to Van Dam. Rob goes off (Cole: “He’s supple!”) and hits an enziguri on Angle to set up the Five Star but Jindrak pulls him away. The Splash hits Jindrak, allowing Angle to roll up Rob (using the ropes) for the pin. Angle heads to the floor so Eddie rolls up the illegal Jindrak, using the ropes as well, for an elimination to make it 3-2 (Eddie/Show/Cena vs. Reigns/Angle).

Eddie tells Angle to bring it on and there go the straps. Eddie tags in Show, making Angle tag in Reigns. Reigns gets in one or two shots but a chokeslam beats him quickly. Kurt rolls through a chokeslam into the ankle lock but Show sends him through the ropes to escape. Angle starts to walk up the aisle but Van Dam is waiting on him. Kurt backs up while still looking at RVD, and backs into Show. He reaches up to see how tall what he backed into is and shakes his head. Show throws Kurt back in to face Cena (in for the first time legally) and it’s an FU and Frog Splash for the final elimination.

Rating: C+. This wasn’t a good match but it was entertaining, which is more than you got from almost all of last year’s show. I’m guessing Cena and Carlito were injured as they didn’t do anything for the most part. Angle was great here and the look on his face when he backed into Big Show always makes me chuckle. Fun match here which is what you need sometimes.

Maven, who for some reason likely related to drug intoxication is in the main event tonight, offers to demonstrate his skills to Coach (the West Virginia accent was a killer for him) but Snitsky jumps Maven and Maven is badly busted open. This would be how they would keep Maven out of a PPV main event for most of the match when they realized OH SNAP WE PUT MAVEN IN A MAIN EVENT!

Video on Heidenreich vs. Undertaker, where Heidenreich is the latest guy to try to kill Taker at Paul Heyman’s direction. This was one of those matches where they were trying to make it seem like Undertaker was in trouble but Heidenreich comes off like the villain in the fifth direct to video sequel in a horror series that has overstayed its welcome by two movies.

Heidenreich vs. Undertaker

Heidenreich comes out in a straightjacket because he might attack more plants. Taker does the big long entrance as is his custom. Taker stares at Heidenreich for awhile before the beating begins. A charge in the corner runs into a Heidenreich elbow but the Dead Man will have none of this being on defense stuff. Taker works on the arm but a Heyman distraction lets Heidenreich crotch Undertaker to break up Old School. He crotches Taker against the post again and we head to the floor.

Heidenreich pounds away on Taker against the barricade while shouting that he can beat Undertaker. Taker again shrugs that off and hits the legdrop on the apron for two back in the ring. Old School hits the second time followed by a modified Downward Spiral for two. A big boot misses Heidenreich in the corner and it’s time for more punching on the floor. This isn’t one of those matches where the fans are worried about Undertaker as I don’t think anyone believes Heidenreich is a real threat.

A kick to Taker’s face sets up a chinlock and a clothesline for two. Another clothesline stops Taker’s comeback but a suplex stops the stopping of the comeback. Heidenreich sends him to the apron but Taker stuns him on the top rope. Taker channels his inner Kane (he had the name first) and hits a top rope clothesline for two. Back in and Snake Eyes/the big boot takes Heidenreich down again.

The chokeslam is broken up and Heidenreich gets two off a Boss Man Slam. Then like an idiot, Heidenreich punches away in the corner while Taker’s arms are down. The obvious Last Ride only gets two though as Heidenreich grabs the rope. Heidenreich tries a sleeper but Taker is like boy please and suplexes out of it almost immediately. Chokeslam and Tombstone finish this quick.

Rating: D. Like I said at the end of the day, did ANYONE buy Heidenreich as a real threat to Taker? The guy just wasn’t that good and he came off as more silly than a serious threat. Not much to see here and Heidenreich never got higher than he did in this match. Taker would move on to a much better feud with Orton soon enough.

Bischoff says Maven is out of the main event and if he allows Orton to add a replacement, HHH will complain and Eric will lose his vacation, which is the point of the main event.

We recap Trish vs. Lita, which is happening because….well who else are they going to fight? Lita got pregnant with Baby Kane but lost it because of Snitsky. Trish made fun of Lita for being a sl**, having a dead baby, and for being fat.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Lita

Trish is defending. Lita is all ticked off and punches Trish as soon as she gets in. Trish gets pounded even more and they head to the floor where Trish goes into a table and gets cracked with a chair 80 seconds into the match. Trish apparently has a broken nose. This wasn’t much, but these two would main event Raw in a few weeks. I don’t mean a match that went on last and then they had the promo that closed the show. I mean they spent the whole show hyping up Trish Stratus vs. Lita as the main event and Lita won the title and celebrated to end the show. It was actually pretty awesome.

Teddy comes in to congratulate Team Guerrero while Show is in a towel. Show hands the towel to Teddy and walks off. Cena: “THAT’S DISGUSTING!” Teddy makes Cena vs. Carlito for the title on Thursday. Why is Cena in his underwear?

We recap Booker T vs. JBL. Booker pinned JBL in a tag match but JBL says Booker isn’t in his league. Booker beat up Orlando Jordan and pinned him to earn the title shot. There really isn’t much to this one.

Smackdown World Title: John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Booker T

Booker’s big yellow gloves don’t really do him any favors. Feeling out process to start as they trade really basic stuff for the first minute and a half or so. Booker knocks him to the floor and JBL gets the advantage coming back in. Back to the floor and Booker gets sent over the announce table. As they head back in, Jordan gets in a cheap shot to give JBL two. Still in first gear at best.

JBL hooks in a cobra clutch followed by an elbow drop and a chinlock. After that VICIOUS offense, Booker easily fights back and hits a superplex to put both guys down. Orlando gets in some more cheap shots on the floor but JBL walks into a Book End out there to give Booker his first real advantage. Back in and a missile dropkick gets two for Booker. They’re into second gear now but it’s just not an interesting match.

Booker goes up but another Jordan distraction lets JBL avoid a Houston Hangover (flip legdrop). Another sleeper by JBL is escaped but Jordan breaks up the ax kick. JBL hits a quick DDT for two and there goes the referee. Jordan comes in and pounds on Booker but Josh Matthews comes out to help Booker for reasons that aren’t important enough to explain. JBL destroys Josh but there’s the side kick to JBL. The ax kick takes him down as well but Jordan takes out the referee. Booker hits the Book End on Jordan but JBL clocks Booker with the belt to retain.

Rating: D. This just didn’t work. Basically they were redoing the HHH/Flair run from 2003 with Jordan interfering every ten seconds and the matches sucking and the crowd groaning when JBL retains the title. JBL is a hilarious commentator and a solid main event jobber, but as champion the guy was painfully boring.

Batista and HHH are ready for the main event.

We recap the main event which is Team HHH vs. Team Orton. Team Orton has united to oppose HHH’s tyranny and the winning team gets to run Raw for a week each. Snitsky has said that when Team HHH wins, he’s coming for HHH’s world title, as has Edge. Batista has been looking at the title too. This gets the music video treatment for the night. Maven and Snitsky stick out like two shattered thumbs in this video.

Team HHH vs. Team Orton

HHH, Edge, Batista, Gene Snitsky

Randy Orton, Chris Jericho, Chris Benoit, Maven

HHH is world champion. Maven isn’t here due to the earlier attack. It’s interesting to think that it would be Batista rather than Orton that would rise up out of this match as the real star. Not that Orton isn’t a star, but Batista was without a doubt the biggest star in the company in 2005 and part of 2006. For some reason Edge comes out last. Benoit vs. Edge to start which is fine with me. Benoit destroys Edge and knocks him to the floor to start but it’s off to Orton vs. Snitsky.

Orton pounds him down with ease before it’s Jericho in off the tag. HHH comes in but Jericho immediately elbows him down and brings in Orton to no response. Orton can’t challenge for the world title because of some stipulation due to losing to Flair. Great way to make sure the fans get behind him there right? Make it clear that no matter how awesome he is, he’s not getting the title shot.

Batista comes in and has some better luck with Randy, firing off shoulders into the corner. Edge is in now and he mocks Orton’s pose in an often done bit. Edge draws in Jericho for no apparent reason, but it allows Orton to clothesline Edge back down. Off to Benoit as the fans are dead for this match for some reason. Benoit cleans house and suplexes everyone in sight. Edge prevents a Swan Dive onto HHH, so HHH suplexes Edge onto HHH and Swan Dives both of them for two.

Everything breaks down even more and HHH gets caught in the Sharpshooter by Benoit. Snitsky makes the save and Edge gets put in the Crossface. This time Batista saves, allowing HHH to Pedigree Benoit and give Edge the pin for the elimination. Jericho comes in to pound away on Edge but HHH and Snitsky get in an argument. Batista comes to HHH’s defense but has to break up the Walls on HHH instead.

Flair trips up Jericho and gets ejected for his efforts. Flair walks up the aisle but comes back a second later to allow Batista to kill Orton and Jericho. There’s the spinebuster to Jericho but Orton hits Big Dave with the belt, allowing Jericho to hit the enziguri on Batista for the pin. Jericho hits the springboard dropkick to knock Snitsky onto HHH on the floor but Batista kills Jericho with the clothesline before leaving.

It’s Snitsky vs. Jericho at the moment with Snitsky choking away. Edge comes in and pounds on his fellow Canadian but gets caught in the sleeper drop to put both guys down. Orton gets shoved to the floor and Edge and HHH double team him for a bit. Jericho DDTs Snitsky down….and here comes Maven. He goes right after Snitsky and takes him down with a forearm as things seem to go into slow motion.

Maven bulldogs HHH down and is all fired up, but Snitsky kills him with a chair shot for a DQ. HHH covers the dead Maven for the easy elimination. Edge keeps covering Jericho but can’t get more than a bunch of two’s. It’s Orton/Jericho vs. HHH/Edge if you’re keeping score. A spear puts Jericho out and it’s 2-1 with Orton in trouble. Orton says bring it on and is promptly beaten down in the corner.

Edge suplexes Orton down and holds him while HHH pounds away. Orton punches away at HHH but gets DDT’d down for two. Edge comes back in and gets slammed down before getting dropkicked into HHH on the apron. That gets two off a rollup from Orton but he walks into a HHH spinebuster. We get the required heel miscommunication as Edge spears HHH down and walks into an RKO for the pin. It’s down to Orton vs. HHH with the Game hitting Orton low as Edge leaves. The Pedigree is countered into the RKO for the final pin.

Rating: B. The match was good stuff but as I said earlier, Orton pinning HHH doesn’t mean anything. Somehow Orton would get a title match at the Rumble through means I don’t remember where HHH would destroy Orton once and for all. I think I’m the only person on the planet that liked Orton’s first main event face run so when I watched this I was digging it at the time. It turned out they got lucky with Batista, but the Orton face run could have been more if HHH hadn’t hacked the legs out from under it.

Overall Rating: B-. There’s some dull stuff here, but the good stuff really is solid as you can see the new generation ready to burst through. The main event was entertaining stuff and the fans did react to Orton pinning HHH clean. The Smackdown side of things was pretty lame but other than that, this was a solid show and I was digging it at the end. Good show.

Ratings Comparison

Spike Dudley vs. Billy Kidman vs. Chavo Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: C+

Redo: B-

Shelton Benjamin vs. Christian

Original: B

Redo: B

Team Guerrero vs. Team Angle

Original: D

Redo: C+

Undertaker vs. Heidenreich

Original: D

Redo: D

Trish Stratus vs. Lita

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Booker T

Original: F

Redo: D

Team Orton vs. Team HHH

Original: B-

Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: C-

Redo: B-

In a rare instance, I liked this a lot better the second time around.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/11/13/history-of-survivor-series-count-up-2004-eyebrows-huffman-main-events/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

 

 

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Monday Night Raw
Date: November 14, 2005
Location: Target Center, Minneapolis, Minnesota
Attendance: 6,000
Commentators: Jonathan Coachman, Jerry Lawler, Joey Styles

This is the Eddie Guerrero Tribute Show. Eddie passed away I think the previous day in his hotel room, making this obviously not a normal show. It’s an often requested show so I more or less had to do it at some point. The matches mean nothing of course and it’s not like the guys’ heads are on straight. I’ve heard it’s good, so let’s get to it.

Before I get started, I probably should give my thoughts on Eddie as a whole. I never was huge on him. I think he’s a great wrestler and had exceptional talent, but he wasn’t the guy that I saw as this legend that so many people claim him to be. It also strikes me as very ironic that after he passed away he was all of a sudden this tragic figure that was so inspirational to everyone, despite no one seeming to say that while he was alive.

I do not like the way his legacy was exploited in storylines later. I stand by what I say that Eddie Guerrero won the 06 Rumble and beat Orton and Angle in the world title match at Wrestlemania. Rey got his push off the back of Eddie and I can’t stand that at all. I’m not saying it was Rey’s fault, but I’ve never been able to stand the push that he got as well as the constant referencing Eddie when he has nothing to do with the stories. Anyway in short he’s a great wrestler, but not one of the greats. Let’s get to it.

We open with the entire roster standing on the stage to a big Eddie chant. Vince stands in front of them and says that he passed away so tonight we’re going to celebrate his life and career. Everyone is clearly sad but they’re not as shaken up as they probably had been before. Vince asks everyone to stand in silence as they ring the bell ten times which is kind of hard to watch.

There’s a video tribute to Eddie, set to Johnny Cash’s Hurt. Good stuff. Back in the arena Vince says Viva La Raza. BIG Thank You Eddie chant.

We begin the sitting down tributes from the guys, the first being Cena. He talks about how passionate Eddie was and how he mentored Cena as he started here.

First clip is Eddie spraying Big Show with sewage on Smackdown.

Big Show/Kane vs. MNM

The difference in Show’s weight then as compared to now is striking. He is FAT here. He’s still big today but he doesn’t look like he’s retaining water. I probably shouldn’t notice this here but Lillian is smoking in that little black dress. Both teams are tag champions on their respective shows with Show/Kane being on Raw. Show vs. Nitro starts us off and we unleash the chops.

Kane goes up for the clothesline but the two M’s take care of the big friend freak and Nitro gets a shot in to Kane with a belt to get two. MNM can’t suplex Kane so he throws them around instead. Off to Show and the beating begins again. Show massacres them as Melina gets up on the apron. She gets a kiss and Mercury gets the Kane clothesline. Double chokeslam ENDS Nitro for the pin.

Rating: C-. If I didn’t mention this before, the ratings here aren’t ones that should be taken seriously. The guys aren’t really thinking clearly probably and the matches aren’t going to mean anything in the long run. MNM would get better but their successors, Miz and Morrison would work better. This was ok for a semi-squash though.

Lillian tells a story about being in Eddie’s group in Iraq last year. She speaks some Spanish, saying she’ll see him again someday.

We get a clip of Eddie talking about auctioning off a bunch of Kurt’s stuff which is similar to the way Cryme Tyme would sell stuff off. Funny bit.

Shelton Benjamin vs. Kurt Angle

This works. Angle is in the black tonight so you can tell he’s being serious. Angle takes a quick knee to pray a bit before we start. Angle takes him to the mat almost immediately so Shelton starts using the ropes to his advantage and we have a standoff. I love watching Angle hit belly to bellies. Angle gets a chinlock and calls some spots a bit too loudly.

Benjamin counters a suplex and hooks a DDT to put both guys down. It’s so odd to hear Joey talking about Kurt Angle for some reason. We crank it up a bit but Shelton breaks out a Samoan Drop of all things but he can’t get the T-Bone. Dragon Whip works instead for a close two. Running corner suplex is blocked and Benjamin gets a HUGE clothesline off the top for two.

Angle is like boy I’m Kurt Angle and busts out the Germans and the Angle Slam for only two of course. Shelton blocks a moonsault and hits a release German off the top! SICK bump there. Somehow it only gets two and as Shelton complains about the count Angle grabs the ankle and gets the grapevine. Since Shelton isn’t the Undertaker, that ends this solid match.

Rating: B-. I really liked this actually. Shelton was the MAN in 2005, more than holding his own by just showing off how awesome he was against far better wrestlers than himself. This was another good match where his inexperience caught up with him but was still pretty freaking sweet. Good match and a lot of fun on a hard show to get through.

I wasn’t kidding on the hard to get through part as this has taken me nearly two days to get this far. Angle holds up the armband with EG on it and is having trouble holding it together.

Shawn talks about how he never wrestled Eddie but has a connection with Eddie as both men were born again Christians. Good little speech here and rather touching. Unless you’re Gregory Helms I guess.

Clips from the Lie Cheat and Steal vignettes which were absolutely hilarious and were actually the parts of Smackdown I was looking forward to most for a few months. It’s so weird to see Vickie as a decent looking woman with red/blonde hair.

Chavo does what is probably the hardest talk of his life as he talks about growing up with Eddie as a brother rather than as his uncle. They were only three years apart so they grew up more or less as brothers. We get a cool story of them wrestling in Chavo Sr.’s promotion in El Paso when they were kids. This is clipped as I’d definitely assume he talked about this for a long time and you know they wouldn’t tell him to wrap it up. This was again hard to sit through.

Shawn Michaels vs. Rey Mysterio

This should be awesome as well. This is the older version of Rey’s song which is kind of weird to hear now. The new one is way better. Of course they speed things WAY up and neither guy can get an advantage. Coach talks about how tonight the titles and rivalries and brands have been put aside which for once isn’t cheesy as this stuff really does come off as they want to perform in Eddie’s name which is cool to see.

Joey makes a good point: how often do you see Shawn as the bigger and slower guy in a match? Shawn catapults Rey over the top but he hangs on and gets a springboard seated senton for two which Joey calls a Thesz Press for some reason. Shawn avoids a pair of 619s but gets caught with a Pescado as we take a break.

Back with Shawn holding a sleeper. We see a clip of him hitting a spinning neckbreaker during the break. I always like when guys break out random basic moves like those. It’s not like everyone knows five moves and that’s it. Heck even Cena knows six. Shawn controls for the most part here which is weird to see. Shawn beats on him a bit and works Rey’s back.

Rey speeds things up a bit and kicks Shawn in the legs and gets some dropkicks for two. Shawn hits the flying forearm and both guys are down. Coach predicts a nip up. Hey what do you know as he was right. 619 is avoided and a clothesline gets two for Shawn. He liked it I guess so he hits another and Rey is down again. The elbow hits but the Chin Music does not. In a VERY surprising twist, Rey gets a headscissors, hits the 619 and drops the dime on Shawn for the clean pin. WOW.

Rating: B-. Keep in mind that Rey wasn’t a world champion guy at this point so this would be like Kingston pinning Edge clean. It would be a huge win for him which wouldn’t be remembered soon after this due to it being a special night. Still though, this would be a good match either way and the whole thing worked. Something similar would happen the next night as Chavo beat JBL which there wasn’t a thing wrong with at all.

Batista talks about Eddie helping him through a lot of problems including some personal problems. Eddie was in a lot of pain but would go out there every night for the fans and entertain them as well as he could.

Another Eddie video to Hurt which might be the same one from earlier. Yeah it’s the same one.

Diva Battle Royal

Ashley, Maria, Christy, Victoria, Melina, Jillian Hall, Mickie James, Candace Michelle, Trish Stratus

Mickie was still psycho at this point and didn’t have her usual personality here. Trish is Women’s Champion here and they’re all in Eddie shirts. All the shirts come off at once in one of the best parts of the night. Everyone pairs off except for I think that’s Maria. Sweet goodness how hot was Christy?

Mickie gets a sweet headscissors to show off her sweeter thong but goes out as a result. As does Jillian. Maria is kind of standing off to the side and stealing shots when she can. Ashley goes out by Victoria and Candace. Victoria and Melina try to take out Trish but runs into the Matrish which is awesome. Candace punches Christy to the floor.

We’re down to Victoria, Trish, Maria, Melina and Candace. Trish gets the headscissors to put Candace out. Maria sneaks up on Victoria to put her out. She’s the ditzy chick here so this is surprising. Melina and Trish look at her and throw her out with ease. Stratusfaction is blocked and Melina shoves her out for the surprising win.

Rating: C. Hard to grade again but the girls were rather hot and this was the only storyline thing they did all night which I can certainly live with. They were trying to find someone for Trish to feud with while Mickie got ready so there wasn’t much going on here at all. Hot girls though so no complaints on that end.

Rey talks about missing Eddie as he is clearly not sure what to say at first but it starts coming out. His is clipped a bit also as there’s also the possibility that they said something personal that they don’t want airing on national TV. Totally understandable if that’s the case. He stops talking for awhile and says that everyone is going to miss Eddie and his presence. Rey has to keep pausing during this as he can’t keep talking.

We see one of Eddie’s biggest moments as he and Benoit hugged with both of them as world champions to end Wrestlemania 20. That was a huge moment in retrospect as the smaller and “less marketable” stars were at the top of the company and were completely accepted as the top guys on the roster. Really an amazing moments and the peaks of both of their careers.

Simon Dean vs. Eugene

Dean is the fitness guy played by Nova. This is a comedy match if you didn’t get that. They get in a pushup contest and Eugene does his JYD headbutts. Back in the ring after a brief skirmish on the floor. Dean hits a chinlock and Eugene Hulks Up and hits an Airplane Spin. Dean accidentally slingshots himself into the buckle with his stretch bands and a Rock Bottom ends this. No rating but this was rather funny at times and you can’t complain for a second about a match like this on a show like this.

Chris Benoit talks and this is the big one here for the most part as these two were more or less inseparable throughout their mainstream careers. Benoit talks about being able to pour his heart out to Eddie and get help whenever he needed it from him. Benoit talks directly to Eddie and breaks down in tears that are bordering on wailing. The emotion here is real as allegedly the diaries found at Benoit’s murder scene were filled with writing about how he missed Eddie so much. It’s so….so…..I’m not sure what the right word is to think that you might have just seen the moment that sent Benoit beyond the point of return.

HHH talks about how great Eddie was in the ring and how great of a performer he was. He talks about how Eddie overcame his demons and beat every single one of them which from what I’ve heard was completely true and that he had been clean and sober for four years when he passed away which is a very good thing to hear.

Ric Flair vs. William Regal

Flair is the Intercontinental Champion here but this is of course non-title. This is a very old school style match with Flair hooking an abdominal stretch and cheating. This is less of a match and more of a how to have a Ric Flair match. Regal unlaces Flair’s boot which is a new one for me I think. Regal hammers away for a bit and sends Flair to the floor. And never mind as Flair gets some chops and goes for the knee as the Figure Four ends it with relative ease. No rating here as it was little more than a long practice for Flair.

Stephanie talks about first meeting Eddie when Eddie was thinking about making the jump to WWF. Eddie was apparently very humble which is a recurring line tonight. She talks about talking to Eddie on Friday where he talked about winning the title again. Allegedly, and I’ve never heard this confirmed for sure, Eddie was supposed to win the title on the upcoming Smackdown as Batista was injured. Supposedly Stephanie confirmed that here but I didn’t hear that from her here.

We get some more Eddie stuff including him accidentally winning the IC Title (in Lexington) which was one of the oddest title changes ever but it worked perfectly in a weird wrestling way.

John Cena vs. Randy Orton

Cena is world champion. Orton actually wears his own shirt here which is a first tonight I think. Cena wrestles in the shirt which is a nice little touch. Since there is zero point to this being a real match it’s an extended highlight reel from these two. It doesn’t even break four minutes as Cena cranks things up and then Bob Orton runs in for the DQ to break up the FU. No rating again as about ¼ was chinlock. Cena gets the FU anyway. In a classy move Cena takes off his shirt and leaves it and the title on the mat to end the show.

Overall Rating: A. This was a very fine show tribute aside. There were some very good matches, but again that’s not something that mattered here. This was about a show in memory of a great wrestler that suddenly passed away. I do have issues with Eddie’s death as it was brought on by years of substance abuse, but the fact that he got clean means a lot and is a great story indeed.

This was a very good show, but again it’s hard to sit through until I just rammed through it one night. It got to me, which isn’t something that happens often. The wrestling was good and having the comedy match on there was a nice touch as comedy was a big part of Eddie’s style at various times. He was indeed great and this was a very well done tribute to him as it felt genuine rather than something thrown together. Well done and a very good show, but I wouldn’t recommend watching it unless you can take some hard emotions along with it.

 

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