New Year’s Revolution 2005 (2019 Redo): Two Thirds Of A Mess Is Mostly Messy

IMG Credit: WWE

Date: January 9, 2005
Location: Coliseo de Puerto Rico, San Juan, Puerto Rico
Attendance: 15,764
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

The opening video starts by talking about how awesome Puerto Rico is but bleeds into a video on the horrors of the Chamber. It’s a simple idea but what else are they supposed to talk about here?

Tag Team Titles: Christian/Tyson Tomko vs. Eugene/William Regal

Regal and Eugene are defending. Eugene now has a Hulk Hogan inspired bandanna and shirt, making him just a bit more awesome. Regal works on Christian’s arm to start but Christian takes him down with a wristdrag. Some shoulders give Regal two and the basics continue with a hiptoss, allowing the tag off to Eugene. That means Christian’s tights are pulled up rather far and Eugene dances a bit.

Eugene leapfrogs over him and gets on all fours for the headbutts and raising of a leg. Tomko comes in so Eugene bails to the floor to high five some fans. The villains give chase but Eugene sneaks underneath the ring and rams Christian into Tomko for a bit of fun. We settle down to Tomko taking over on Eugene, including some elbows to the face in the corner.

Christian comes in for some shots to the head but it’s time to Hulk Up. The comeback includes a backdrop (not exactly a Hogan specialty) and a tag to Regal, who fires off some dropkicks of all things. Tomko takes him down again though and some elbow drops get two. We hit the chinlock as Regal’s nose is already busted. It’s back to Tomko for some choking as the fans tell him that he sucks. A cheap shot from Christian cuts off Regal’s comeback attempt and it’s off to a front facelock.

Regal starts heading over for the tag but Christian pulls Eugene down, meaning there’s no one to tag. For some reason Eugene doesn’t move two feet forward to tag Regal when he makes the corner and it’s Tomko pulling Regal back into the corner. A missed charge lets Regal make the tag though and the comeback is on. Eugene forearms Tomko down and hits a dropkick….but comes up clutching his knee. It’s clearly bad and the match grinds to a halt as Christian and Tomko are afraid to touch Eugene. Regal takes Christian to the floor and Eugene gets a very messy rollup (fair enough) to retain.

Rating: C-. It was mostly a comedy match in the first place and then the knee injury messed up whatever the ending was supposed to be. That’s certainly not on them though as there isn’t much you can do when one of your wrestlers knees goes out like that. Eugene won’t be back in the ring for about six months.

The doctors come in to check on Eugene and Regal is right there with him.

Here’s a shot of Christy walking around the pool for the most obvious reasons in the world.

Christian and Tomko run into Edge, who has an idea for later in the night. Christian isn’t happy with Edge and sends Tomko after him but Edge says he can make Christian World Champion. Now Christian is intrigued and they’ll be talking some more.

We recap Trish Stratus vs. Lita, which has been going on for months now. Lita took the Women’s Title from Trish in a very good match about a month ago and now it’s time for the rematch.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Lita

Lita is defending. Feeling out process to start with Lita tripping her down and Trish bailing to the ropes. Lita knocks her to the floor and tries a Thesz press, wrecking her own knee in the process. Back in and Trish hammers away on the mostly immobile Lita, followed by some kicks to the injured leg. Lita tries some right hands but can’t stand up. She tries the DDT but falls down again, setting up the Chick Kick to make Trish champion again. I’m not going to rate this as Lita couldn’t move for most of the match. She tore her ACL on that Thesz press and wouldn’t wrestle again for over a year.

Maria is by the pool as well for the same reason as Christy.

Edge tries to give Christian his spot in the Elimination Chamber because he can’t get a fair shot tonight. See, Christian can have the spot and whoever wins can face Edge for the title tomorrow night on Raw. Eric Bischoff: “ARE YOU KIDDING ME?” It’s not happening so Edge leaves in a huff and runs into Shawn, who says he’ll call it right down the line. Unless he’s provoked of course because then he’d retaliate. He’s looking forward to counting Edge out tonight.

Intercontinental Title: Shelton Benjamin vs. Maven

Maven is challenging and hides in the ropes early on. He does it again for a bonus and the fans insult him in Spanish, sending Maven outside for a breather. The fans tell him that he’s awful so Maven gets back on the apron….and then drops down again. Maven doesn’t want the count started yet because he has something to say. He even gets up on a chair to talk about how he’s not sure how many people here speak English. Therefore, he’ll talk very slow so people can understand him.

Maven yells at a fan that he doesn’t know what he’s saying. See, he can’t concentrate if the fans keep yelling at him like this, meaning he can’t win the Intercontinental Title. Maven goes with some Spanish to tell the fans to shut their mouths. Shelton goes after him but Maven says that’s enough and walks out. He changes his mind at nine and dives back in….where Shelton rolls him up for the pin. The match was about six minutes total and Maven spent four and a half of that on the floor.

Rating: F. I get how this could be a nice way to get the fans going and then give them something to cheer for, but after what else has happened on this show, that couldn’t have come at a worse time. We haven’t had a full match without someone getting severely hurt yet and now they do a promo instead of a match? It could have been a good idea at a house show, but how much did fans pay to watch a promo from MAVEN?

Post match Maven says that didn’t count and wants a rematch. He says Shelton is the second Women’s Champion so let’s do this again.

Intercontinental Title: Shelton Benjamin vs. Maven

Shelton is defending and the exploder retains the title in five seconds.

Candice Michelle rubs suntan lotion on Christy’s back. These things are about fifteen seconds long so at least they’re not wasting too much time with them.

We look at the debate from Raw with Muhammad Hassan and Daivari beating up JR and Lawler.

Hassan and Daivari say that was biased footage that didn’t show Lawler insulting him before the fight. Oh and Puerto Rico isn’t even good enough to be a state. They were detained in the airport last night for three hours and their hotel reservations were “mysteriously” lost. Tonight, he’s going to show that just because you’re treated like a second class citizen doesn’t mean that you are one.

Jerry Lawler vs. Muhammad Hassan

JR is in King’s corner so there’s no commentary for this. Hassan slams him to start but Lawler does it right back to him as the feeling out continues. Three more slams put Lawler down again and it’s time for a breather. Back in and Lawler punches him to the floor, where Hassan gets in an argument with JR. That just means more right hands but Hassan takes over again back inside.

Hassan starts in on the shoulder with JR imploring King to kick out. The camel clutch continues the stereotypical checklist as the fans are dying here. More basic offense, including a kick to the head and a suplex, get two and it’s off to the chinlock. A neckbreaker gets two more and Daivari is losing his mind on these kickouts.

The BORING chants begin (and rightfully so) and Lawler gets fired up, meaning it’s time to take down the strap. The dropkick sets up the middle rope fist drop for two, followed by a DDT for the same. Daivari put the foot on the rope so it’s time for the showdown with JR. That’s enough of a distraction for Hassan to hit a Downward Spiral for the pin.

Rating: F. I’m not sure I can think of a good thing to say about this one. Hassan is supposed to be the big new heel and needs help beating Jerry Lawler in his debut? On top of that, the match wasn’t even remotely good with Hassan using the most standard offense you can imagine. This was horrible and Hassan looks to be in trouble early.

Batista promises to be a wrecking machine in the Chamber when Randy Orton comes in. Orton calls Batista a stooge and says HHH only cares about the two of them as long as they’re helping protect the title. He’s been in there before and helped HHH retain. Look where that got Orton in the end. Batista threatens him but says he’s coming for the title.

Coach takes King’s place on commentary for the time being.

We recap Gene Snitsky vs. Kane. Snitsky caused Lita and Kane to lose their baby and then crushed Kane’s throat. Since then, Snitsky has….well pretty much just existed. Now Kane is back for revenge in a story that wasn’t that great in the first place.

Kane vs. Gene Snitsky

JR busts out the Bowling Shoe Ugly line before the opening bell, because after everything else, this match warrants a warning. Kane runs him over to start and drops the jumping leg, followed by some standard choking. A powerslam gets two but Snitsky gets in a sidewalk slam and a clothesline of his own.

It’s time to head outside and peel back the ring mats, which can never end well. Snitsky’s powerbomb is countered into a backdrop, though he’s fine enough to kick Kane out of the air back inside. Kane’s back is bent around the post and Snitsky slams him….so Kane sits up. He does it a second and third time as Snitsky doesn’t seem to learn.

The head back outside with Snitsky grabbing a chair but getting kicked in the face. Back in and Kane hammers away in the corner, setting up a sidewalk slam. The top rope clothesline connects this time around but a hot shot cuts Kane off. The chokeslam is broken up and Snitsky bites the ear. Kane sits up again and this time it’s the Tombstone for the pin.

Rating: D. This is rapidly approaching an all time terrible show with another with another bad match. These two have fought as many times as you can now and there isn’t anything left for the feud. Kane wins and Snitsky….well he’s probably done in this role, thereby wasting what was a pretty good build. This show has been completely awful so far and seeing these two have a pretty bad power match didn’t help things.

Ad for the Rise and Fall of ECW. I need to watch that again.

Stacy Keibler is now by the pool and let’s look at pretty much everything from earlier again. Then Simon Dean showed up and showed someone into the pool, where the Divas and Val Venis messed around. A chicken fight broke out and Christy untied Maria’s top to win. Oh Christy is so wacky and fun.

We recap the World Title being decided in the Elimination Chamber. So HHH lost the title in a triple threat but since the bosses can’t make their mind up, we’re getting the Chamber to crown HHH as the champion again. Like it’s going to be anyone else, even with Shawn Michaels as the guest referee.

The Chamber is lowered.

HHH is with Batista in the back and they agree to take care of each other. Unless HHH is out before Batista gets in that is. If that’s the case, Batista is coming for the title.

Eric Bischoff comes out and explains the Chamber.

Lilian Garcia explains the Chamber.

Raw World Title: Edge vs. Chris Jericho vs. Randy Orton vs. HHH vs. Batista, Chris Benoit

Inside the Chamber, the title is vacant coming in, Batista is coming in last due to winning the Beat The Clock Challenge and Shawn Michaels is guest referee. It’s Chris Benoit vs. Chris Jericho to start things off. Feeling out process to start and they go to the mat with Jericho getting a headlock. Benoit comes back with the skin ripping chops in the corner but Jericho is right back with some of his own. The first German suplex rocks Jericho so he elbows his way out of the second.

That means he has to elbow out of a Crossface attempt instead and the bulldog gets two on Benoit. A top rope superplex puts Jericho down but Benoit can’t follow up as HHH is in third. HHH starts in with the knees, followed by a clothesline to take Jericho down. It’s time to go outside with the steel floor, but first Benoit needs to go into the Chamber wall. That’s good for some blood so HHH punches away at the cut. Another ram into the cage gets two but Jericho breaks up the Pedigree.

A backdrop sends HHH into the steel and you know JR can call that one with some relish. The bulldog gets two on HHH but Benoit is back up go hit a neckbreaker on Jericho. The fans count us down (in Spanish) until it’s Edge in fourth. That means a series of spears in the corner and the Edgecution for two on HHH. Jericho sends Edge over the top but gets catapulted into the wall. It works so well that HHH gets catapulted as well to put both of them down outside.

Edge’s top rope clothesline hits Benoit, who can’t get the Crossface. Jericho’s, who is busted as well, running enziguri drops Edge for two as the announcers mention Shawn, who has done absolutely nothing so far. HHH, also bleeding, comes in for the spinebuster and Pedigree to Jericho as everyone is down. As luck would have it, Orton is in fifth with a high crossbody on HHH. They head out with HHH going into the wall again, followed by an RKO to Jericho. Orton tries one on Benoit but gets pulled into the Crossface, with Benoit on one knee for some reason.

HHH talks trash while the hold is on so Benoit legs go of Orton and grabs the Sharpshooter. That earns him an RKO from Orton but instead of a cover, we get Edge spearing Shawn by mistake. There’s a spear to Orton but there’s no referee. Edge slaps Shawn so it’s Sweet Chin Music, setting up the Lionsault for the first elimination.

With HHH down, Benoit goes all the way up to the top of the pod for the Swan Dive. There’s still no cover though as Jericho slaps on the Walls with Benoit adding the Crossface on HHH at the same time. Somehow THAT isn’t enough to beat HHH as Batista comes in sixth to complete the field and make the save. The fans are very pleased as Batista wrecks people, leaving HHH (who is somehow alive) alone for the staredown.

The other three break that up so Batista clotheslines Orton and Benoit at the same time. That’s not fair to Jericho, who gets gorilla pressed onto a cameraman for the always fun visual. Benoit chop blocks Batista to save Orton from a choke and it’s time to stomp on Batista in the corner. The mostly dead cameraman is helped out of the Chamber and Jericho bulldogs HHH onto the steel. Batista goes in as well and everyone is down again. It’s Batista up first with a spinebuster on Benoit, followed by a spinebuster on Jericho onto Benoit to get rid of the latter and get us down to four.

A powerslam and Batista Bomb get rid of Jericho and it’s down to three. Everyone winds up outside of the ring with Orton being catapulted into the Chamber wall to make everyone bloody. Batista and HHH start double teaming Orton with Batista not looking all that pleased with the boss.

A powerslam gets two on Orton, followed by the hard clothesline for the same. HHH and Batista yell at Shawn, allowing Orton to come back with right hands and kicks to the ribs. A low blow drops Batista and the RKO gets rid of him with HHH letting the pin go down. The RKO hits HHH but Flair comes in, allowing Batista to blast Orton with the clothesline. HHH hits the Pedigree to get the title back.

Rating: B. It’s long, it’s rather good and while annoying, you knew where they were going with the finish. What matters most here though is Batista, who looks like he’s ready to be unleashed at any time. That’s exactly the point of this match and it worked very well in that regard. It felt like an epic fight to get to the win, though HHH winning again is a necessary evil to get through for the time being.

HHH has Batista put him on his shoulders and we get the thumbs up but no turn to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. This is one of the weirder shows I can remember in a long time. The main event is very good and came close to saving the show, the rest of the night was a disaster. The Women’s Title match can be completely written off and the Tag Team Title match was watchable enough until the ending.

Then there’s the middle of the show, which saw everything fall apart. The Intercontinental Title match can really only be written off by an injury (I’d certainly hope so), Hassan’s match was horribly done and Kane vs. Snitsky just wasn’t very good. That leaves you with the main event, but still it’s not enough to make up for the hour and forty five minutes of awful before then. A lot of this wasn’t their fault, but the middle three matches were so bad that there isn’t much of a way around them. Rather bad show, though the main event is worth a glance if you haven’t seen it in awhile.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

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Monday Night Raw – January 3, 2005: Happy New Year Of Big Dave

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: January 3, 2005
Location: Nassau Veterans Memorial Coliseum, New York City, New York
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the first show of a new year and also the go home show for New Year’s Revolution. That doesn’t leave us very long to finalize everything but since so much of the card is tied up in the Elimination Chamber, you can probably guess where things are going this week. Other than that, we probably need some more matches to be added to the card at the last minute. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of last week’s Beat The Clock Challenge which saw Batista earn the right to enter the Chamber last. Oh and Shawn Michaels is going to be guest referee.

Eric Bischoff is in the back with the World Title and makes tonight very simple: three singles matches between the six Chamber participants. Nothing wrong with that, mainly because it’s once.

Batista vs. Chris Benoit

Batista goes with the power to start so Benoit gets in a dragon screw legwhip to take him down. A backbreaker cuts Benoit off but Batista goes for a turnbuckle pad, allowing Benoit to roll some German suplexes. Batista catches him on top and hits a Muscle buster of all things for a delayed two. The half crab with a knee on Benoit’s head has him in more trouble and Batista even picks up Benoit’s hand to make him tap.

The spinebuster gives Batista two more but Benoit scores with an enziguri, followed by the hard German suplex. Benoit hits the Swan Dive (or at least seems to after a quick camera cut) for two more and the Crossface goes on, though Benoit is almost on top of Batista’s back instead of off to the side. Batista powers up without much effort and drives Benoit head first (several times) into the exposed buckle. Now it’s time to get fired up and the Batista Bomb finishes.

Rating: C+. It’s so frustrating watching WWE stumble through the dark as they try to get monsters (or anyone) over these days when it’s this easy. Batista has been protected for months, says things that makes him look smart and then wins big matches. If they have the talent and intelligence to do the rest, which Batista did because he was well trained down in OVW, you’ll have a star on your hands.

Ric Flair is very pleased with what happened when Batista comes in. Flair says all they have to do is have HHH survive until the end when Batista can destroy everyone so HHH can get the title back. Batista says HHH can count on him, but he wants the $100 from last week’s bet. Flair looks terrified at what this could mean and HHH tells him to give Batista $100.

That’s fine with Flair, who wants to keep the peace. Batista wants HHH’s money though so HHH pulls out $100. Batista laughs and tells HHH to get a sense of humor. Again: treat him like someone with a brain to go with his physical dominance and there is no way he won’t be awesome.

We look back at Snitsky Pillmanizing Kane’s neck.

Snitsky is surprised that Kane is coming back and whispers something to Maria, who runs off. He has a surprise for Kane on Sunday.

Edge still doesn’t get why Shawn Michaels is guest referee on Sunday because it won’t be fair. Bischoff says this is because Edge hurt Shawn even worse and cost Raw revenue. He’s trying to make up for some of it on Sunday, but for now Edge needs to worry about his match.

Edge vs. Chris Jericho

They trade waistlocks to start with Jericho taking him to the mat by the leg. Back up and Edge punches him in the face but gets backdropped to the floor. Jericho follows him out and it’s a double clothesline to take us to a break. We come back with Edge working on the arm for a change, including a DDT on the arm for two. It’s off to a different armbar because Edge is good enough to mix up the holds he uses instead of doing the same things over and over.

Jericho fights up and hits a shoulder with the bad arm, which doesn’t seem to do much damage. A hurricanrana sends Edge flying but he’s right back with a heck of a big boot for two. Jericho’s northern lights suplex gets the same so he kicks Edge hard in the ribs. Edge catches him on top and tries a superplex, which is tossed down for a crash. A missed high crossbody misses Edge but he can’t get the spear. Jericho tries a rollup but Edge sits down on it and grabs the rope for the pin.

Rating: C. It wasn’t quite as good as the opener but Edge cheating to win gave him a victory that he needed. Edge is one of the weaker options in the Chamber so having him cheat to win is a good way for him to catch up. It’s not like Jericho losing is going to do any serious damage to him anyway.

Randy Orton is ready for his long awaited one on one match with HHH before he wins the World Title on Sunday.

JR and King thank the British fans for watching the show live but King cuts him off to say Happy Birthday.

Shelton Benjamin vs. Sylvan Grenier

Non-title with Maven coming out to do commentary. The distraction lets Grenier get in a cheap shot before the bell as Maven starts to gloat. Grenier stomps away in the corner as Maven talks about how he wants the Intercontinental Title match on Sunday. The chinlock goes on, followed by a full nelson to mix the holds up a bit.

Shelton fights up and drives him into the corner for the break and the comeback is on. Rob Conway offers a distraction, allowing Shelton to hit the Dragon Whip. The referee just stops counting at two because Grenier doesn’t kick out and the fans are not pleased. The exploder is good for the pin. Too short to rate but that ending hurt what was already a bad match.

Video on the Elimination Chamber.

And now, the debate between Muhammad Hassan/Daivari and Jim Ross/Jerry Lawler. Hassan goes into the same speech he’s had every time about how America is racist and it got even worse since 9/11. Lawler says that there are racists and idiots in every country. Hassan has every right to complain about that but when he called the troops cowards, he took it too far.

The reason people don’t like Hassan and Daivari is they’re loudmouth jerks. Daivari goes into a rant but Hassan calms things down. Hassan doesn’t like most Arab Americans because they don’t showcase their heritage. He doesn’t like JR shaking his head at this because Hassan is as American as Mickey Mantle and the Oklahoma Sooners. JR won’t do anything about it though because he’s just like America: angry behind his back but a coward face to face.

JR says America isn’t a perfect place but Hassan and Daivari can love it or leave it (erg). Hassan turns over the podium and punches JR in the ribs, followed by a double team beatdown of Lawler. JR gets choked with a belt but the bloody Lawler takes off his own belt and chases them off, collapsing in the process. This could have been worse, but not that much worse. The RAH RAH AMERICA stuff is wearing thin and WWE knows how to lay it on very thick.

Coach is now doing commentary for the rest of the show. On his own. HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Trish Stratus vs. Victoria

Trish wastes no time in taking her down for some forearms and knees to the face. A hair pull takedown gets two as Victoria is looking like a full on jobber here. Trish chokes her in the corner and a throat first catapult into the bottom rope makes it even worse. Victoria gets in a side slam and rollup for two, followed by the clothesline comeback. The dancing moonsault hits raised knees though and the Chick Kick gives Trish the pin.

Rating: D. What happened to Victoria? She’s one of the best options they have in the division but she’s losing a match like this in a match that is just a step above a squash. It’s not like these two can’t have a good match if they’re given the chance but Trish might as well have been facing Stacy Keibler.

Post match Trish promises to do the same to Lita, so here’s Lita for the slugout. This brings out Snitsky for the save, allowing Trish to hit the Chick Kick. Snitsky grabs a chair but Kane returns to let her escape. Kane and Lita have a bit of a moment.

Video on the Elimination Chamber match from Summerslam 2003. Egads do I really have to think about that one again?

Coach explains why he’s out here alone.

Hassan vs. Lawler is set for Sunday.

Pay per view rundown.

Christy Hemme is doing a photo shoot when Eugene shows up to sing Lindsay Lohan to her. Believe it or not, this is actually dumber than it sounds. Thankfully William Regal comes in for the save with Christy escorting Eugene to the ring. It turns out Regal likes Lohan as well, meaning singing and dancing ensues. This is instantly more entertaining than anything Eugene just did.

Christian vs. Eugene

Christian/Tomko vs. Eugene/Regal for the titles on Sunday. Eugene shoulders him down to start and even shows off some power with the gorilla press into a Warrior Splash (with rope shake of course). Christian finally gets in a shot of his own and a quick distraction lets Tomko drive Eugene back first into the apron. We hit the required neck crank for a bit before Eugene comes back with a Rock Bottom for a very delayed two. Tomko comes in so Eugene forearms him to the floor, leaving Christian to grab a sunset flip (and a rope, since he must have been watching Edge’s match earlier) for the pin.

Rating: D. It’s not a good sign when you’re using the same finish twice in about an hour. This was a perfectly acceptable way to build towards the Tag Team Title match on Sunday, which was announced earlier in the show so it’s not like they can have any less of a story going on. The match was nothing to see of course, but it did what it was supposed to do as well as it could have been asked to.

Evolution (since we haven’t seen them in awhile) is ready for tonight but HHH wants Batista to stay in the back. He only has to beat four guys on Sunday but tonight it’s one on one. Tonight, he needs to show the world that Orton was just a tag along. Flair is all for this while Batista doesn’t seem convinced. He’ll only come out if Orton starts beating HHH up….but that won’t happen.

HHH vs. Randy Orton

Thank goodness JR rejoins commentary for this one. They stare each other down for a good while until Orton snaps off the dropkick to take over early on. A clothesline gives Orton two and it’s time to slug it out. The backdrops has HHH in trouble again and we take a break. Back with HHH being thrown outside again as he hasn’t had any major offense so far. HHH finally manages to snap Orton’s throat across the top to take over and a running knee nearly knocks Orton over the barricade.

Of course that means Flair can get in some stomping because he knows how to cheat properly. Back in and HHH drives shoulders in the corner, followed by another trip to the floor. Flair even gets inside this time for no apparent reason as HHH doesn’t cheat, but Orton manages to send him into the post.

Back in and the powerslam gives Orton two, followed by the backbreaker for the same. The high crossbody gets two more and it’s time to reverse some sleepers. That’s broken up and the ref gets bumped, allowing Flair to slide in the ring bell. Orton takes it away though and blasts HHH, drawing in Batista to hit the big clothesline. That brings in Benoit to cancel out Batista but here’s Shawn to take over as referee.

Edge comes in as well but Jericho stops him from spearing Shawn in some good pre-match sucking up. Jericho dives onto Edge and Batista so Shawn starts counting HHH and Orton as the match is still going. It’s HHH up first but his yelling at Shawn lets Orton….miss the RKO. The Pedigree is countered into a rollup for two and now the RKO gives Orton the pin.

Rating: C-. It was dull until the insanity began, but they might as well just give HHH (who is up against COMPLETELY insurmountable odds) the title now. As usual, Orton wins the match that doesn’t matter and it only took a ring bell, a second referee and half a dozen people getting involved. But hey, HHH certainly put him over here and that’s what mattered.

Overall Rating: C-. The big story here continues to be Batista, who is about to break through the glass ceiling and become the biggest thing on the show if the indications are correct. This show was all about building to the Elimination Chamber as Sunday is a total one match show. That’s perfectly fine and something that has been done before, though there is only so much you can get out of a two hour and forty five minute show with only the main event mattering. They didn’t hide that here, but what they were focusing on got the right amount of attention.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – December 27, 2004: Save The Best For Last

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 27, 2004
Location: Mississippi Coast Coliseum, Biloxi, Mississippi
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the final show of a year that wasn’t very good in the first place. We’re coming off the Best of 2004 last week so it’s been a little while since we’ve gotten anything new. The big story is still the build towards the Elimination Chamber at New Year’s Revolution. Other than that, things aren’t the most exciting around here. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Eric Bischoff announcing the Elimination Chamber. Flair’s “oh s***” look at Batista when he was announced for the Chamber was a great touch that I missed before. It makes sense that they would start there as it’s not like there is anything else going on at the moment.

Here’s Bischoff in the arena to explain the Elimination Chamber. Makes sense as there have only been two of them and we haven’t seen it in over a year. As for tonight, all six participants will be taking part in singles matches against mystery opponents, with the one who wins in the shortest time getting to enter last. If any of them lose, they’re out of the Chamber and replaced by whoever beats them. We’ll call it the Beat The Clock Challenge and Christy Hemme will be timekeeper. Oh and there will be a guest referee for the Chamber, who will be announced later tonight. Works for me.

Beat The Clock Challenge: Chris Jericho vs. Christian

Christian has Tomko with him. Christian goes with a slap to the face and a slap to start so Jericho tries the fast pins which never work in a match like this. A sunset flip from Christian sets up a pinfall reversal sequence but the Walls are countered into a small package for two more. Some right hands in the corner have Jericho in more trouble and we hit the chinlock, which goes through a few forms.

Jericho gets sent to the apron but he backdrops Christian over, with Christian landing face first on the floor in a nasty crash. We’re not done yet though as Jericho springboards onto both villains as we take a break. Back with Jericho hitting a crossbody for two, followed by Tomko getting in a cheap shot to give Christian the same. Jericho has had it with Tomko and dropkicks him down before reversing Christian’s rollup into the Walls for the win at 10:47.

Rating: C+. Good match here but you have to expect that from the two of them. It was nice to have some stakes in the match though and the idea that Christian could get in made it better. The time thing is something that can work quite well and makes the matches later on mean something, so at least we’re off to a nice start.

Ric Flair tries to calm HHH down while Batista doesn’t care who he’s facing tonight. The question is why HHH isn’t confident. HHH tries to talk his way out of it and bets $100 that he beats Batista’s time. Flair intervenes again and makes it clear that this is all about HHH, though Batista doesn’t seem phased.

Randy Orton is excited to go into the Chamber since he was able to challenge for the World Title. And they wonder why the face turn didn’t work. His New Year’s resolution is to go to New Year’s Revolution and win the title. Tonight though, he’s winning in the fastest time.

Beat The Clock Challenge: Randy Orton vs. Maven

Christy has changed outfits for the match and the clock is set at 10:47, meaning the countdown clock counts down in a logical move. They lock up to start until Orton hits the dropkick. Maven catches him on top though and sneaks in a poke to the eye, allowing him to shove Orton off the apron. That means a hard ram into the steps and Maven mocks Orton’s pose (with King referring to Orton as the Big O).

The chinlock goes on for a good while until Maven sends him outside. King: “Orton, you cannot win this match out on the floor!” Uh, yeah he can. Orton hits a Russian legsweep into the barricade and the hanging DDT plants Maven back inside. Maven is fine enough to roll through a high crossbody into a rollup for two but it’s the RKO to give Orton the pin at 6:14.

Rating: D+. Not as good of a match as the previous one but Maven isn’t as good as Christian. Orton’s face push still isn’t working, though he’s getting some positive reactions when he’s in the ring. The character just isn’t quite there though and having him not be able to fight for the title for three months was death to the whole thing.

Lita vs. Molly Holly

Non-title. Molly follows Christian’s plan from earlier and slaps Lita in the face. This time works a bit better though as she sends Lita into the corner and grabs a chinlock as JR recaps Lita’s rather up and down year. A monkey flip lets Lita hit some right hands and there’s a headbutt to the ribs for two. Molly misses a charge into the corner and the DDT gives Lita the fast pin.

Post match here’s Snitsky to chase Lita through the crowd and into the back. Lita gets into a room so here’s Bischoff to make Kane vs. Snitsky at New Year’s Revolution.

Simon Dean vs. Rosey

This is fallout from Heat, which either took place last night or two weeks ago depending on if you believe JR or the graphic. Before the match, Simon does the standard YOU’RE ALL FAT stuff. Being called a hog is too much for Rosey, who pulls Simon in to start the beating. For some reason Dean tries a sunset flip, earning himself a big sitdown splash.

Dean gets smart by going after the knee, including wrapping it around the post. The fans don’t like Simon as he works on the knee but Rosey’s comeback gets their attention a bit. It doesn’t go well for Rosey though as the Vader Bomb misses, though Dean decides to go for a slam for some reason. After that falls apart, Rosey grabs Dean’s weightlifting belt and gets rolled up for the pin.

Rating: D. What are you expecting here? Dean is a lower card heel and nothing more than that, which is fine for something short like this. Rosey on the other hand looks like a goof who can’t beat someone like Dean, which doesn’t exactly make me care about either guy. Then again, I don’t know how far they’re expecting Dean to go in the first place.

Beat The Clock Challenge: Edge vs. Eugene

The clock is set at 6:14 so Edge jumps him before the bell to start fast. Eugene fights back without even taking off his ring jacket and gets in a hiptoss. Edge gets sent outside so the jacket can come off but the delay lets Edge snap his throat across the top. The chinlock goes on in a rather dumb move, followed by Edge hitting a dropkick for two. It’s back to the reverse chinlock with less than three minutes to go as Edge keeps wasting time. Eugene fights up and hits an electric chair drop, setting up a crisscross. That’s enough for Eugene to head outside and high five some fans as the clock keeps ticking.

Eugene even hides under the ring as the clock continues to tick away. Back in and Eugene tries a Rock Bottom and Stunner but gets reversed into the spear….which sends Eugene to the floor as time expires. The match keeps going though as Eugene could still win and take the spot. Back in and Eugene hits the Stunner for a very delayed two but a running knee hits the buckle. Edge wraps the knee around the post and debuts (I believe) the Edgecator (the Sharpshooter without stepping over) for the win.

Rating: C-. Not too bad here with the clock playing more of a role this time around. Edge getting frustrated and not making the time was a nice twist, even though there was almost no way the change was coming here. The Beat the Clock thing has worked so far as it’s adding in some drama, which is a lot better than building momentum matches.

Bischoff is on the phone and is glad that someone will make it here tonight. Coach comes in and gives Bischoff his Christmas present: some Coach sunglasses. The call was from the guest referee but Coach doesn’t get to know who it was in advance.

Beat The Clock Challenge: Chris Benoit vs. Viscera

The clock is still at 6:14. Viscera shoves him down without much effort to start as JR and King have no idea how Benoit can pull this off. Benoit gets smart by going after the legs so Viscera runs him over again. That’s fine with Benoit, who tries the chops but walks into a spinwheel kick. Viscera mounts Benoit on the mat for some shots to the face in a rather disturbing image.

A Samoan drop crushes Benoit again and the Crossface attempt is easily countered into a side slam. Benoit somehow manages a belly to back suplex and the Crossface (or Crossthroat here) with Viscera waiting a ridiculous forty seconds before tapping (or moving for that matter) to give Benoit the win at 5:43.

Rating: D. What in the world was that ending? Viscera doing his giant thing for most of the match was fine but did HHH even survive that long in the Crossface at Wrestlemania? I’m hoping it was just a clock thing where they needed the time lower, but at least roll over or fight for the escape or something.

Here’s Stacy Keibler to say he hopes we had a great Christmas. 2004 was a great year and thank you for voting her the Babe of the Year. She’ll bend over backwards and forward to make 2005 that much better. Thankfully Muhammad Hassan and Daivari come out to break up this scintillating promo. Daivari throws Stacy out and Hassan rants about Christmas before going into his same standard speech about how prejudiced we all are.

The fans drown him out with a USA chant so Daivari goes up to commentary to yell at JR and King. Hassan joins them as Lawler gets up and threatens Daivari, meaning the fight is on. JR gets knocked down and Jerry gets in Hassan’s face, meaning a New Year’s Revolution match is likely.

Beat The Clock Challenge: Batista vs. Rhyno

The clock is set at 5:43. Batista tells Rhyno to bring it to start and then elbows him in the face. A shoulder goes well for Batista again as Rhyno’s power game is completely outmatched here. Rhyno gets in a quick Gore for two and Batista is right back up with the Batista Bomb. Batista is so confident that he hits a second one for the pin at 3:02.

Rating: D+. Oh yeah they know what they’re doing with Batista. This was a monster style match with Batista shrugging off an established finisher and nearly cutting Benoit’s time in half. I still don’t think it’s fair to blame Orton’s face push on Orton himself but sweet goodness Batista is nailing every single thing about this push.

Video on Tribute to the Troops.

Coach interrupts Bischoff talking to Candice Michelle to say the special referee is here. Bischoff wants to know how Coach knows he’s here if he doesn’t know the referee. Coach says it has to be him but here’s Hassan to interrupt. He doesn’t like JR and King’s anti-Arab American propaganda so we should have a debate. Bischoff says no because JR isn’t a wrestler, so we’ll have…..a debate. The complete lack of a crowd reaction should tell you all you need to know.

New Year’s Revolution rundown.

HHH complains to Flair about Batista, who doesn’t see the problem. Batista says HHH is starting to tick him off and THAT gets the fans’ attention. Flair plays peacekeeper, again.

Beat The Clock Challenge: Shelton Benjamin vs. HHH

Non-title and the clock is set at 3:02. Everyone else in the Chamber is sitting at ringside. Also, is this a fair match for HHH? Maven, Rhyno, Viscera and the Intercontinental Champion? HHH goes right after him to start and sends Benjamin to the floor, with Lawler again incorrectly saying he can’t win out there. A whip into the steps has Shelton in more trouble and HHH hammers away with right hands. There’s the spinebuster for two and we hit the sleeper to keep HHH in control.

A way too early Pedigree attempt is countered so HHH goes back to the sleeper. HHH gets two arm drops but Shelton gets his foot on the rope as it drops the third time. The celebration is on but time expires to anger HHH all over again. Shelton hits a quick Stinger Splash for two as King starts to panic. There’s the Dragon Whip for two more but HHH gets in a spinebuster for the same. Flair offers a distraction so the exploder doesn’t get a count. Shelton gets rid of Flair and the Pedigree gives HHH the pin.

Rating: C. I liked this more than I should have with HHH being aggressive but not being able to seal the deal. Once the clock expired though, fans got more into things as the possibility that HHH might not make it intrigued them quite a bit. Shelton was even protected in the loss, making this quite a nice little piece of business, especially given the short amount of time.

Post match HHH is relieved but Bischoff brings out Shawn Michaels as guest referee for the Chamber so everyone can freak out to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. They kept things moving this week and it made for a much better show. The matches might not have been masterpieces but the clock deal was a nice touch and it offered something a little different for a change. That’s as good as you’re going to get when so much of the roster is tied up in one match and it wound up being a good show to end the show.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – December 13, 2004: Hurry Up And Wait

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 13, 2004
Location: Von Braun Center, Huntsville, Alabama
Attendance: 4,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

The year is starting to come to a close and Eric Bischoff is back to run things again. This time around that means we need a solution to the World Title being vacated, which should mean some kind of big gimmick match for the January’s pay per view. That would be the regular January show and not the Royal Rumble, because January suddenly needs to pay per views. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here’s Eric Bischoff with the World Title to get things going. Bischoff recaps all the changes since he went on vacation and then gets into the meat of things. Two weeks ago, both Chris Benoit and Edge got a fall at the same time, but traditionally a tie goes to the champion. That would be HHH, so all three are standing in the back watching intently. HHH says no one beat him, clearly not understanding how triple threats work.

That starts an argument with Benoit so Edge says this is how it always goes. Edge has had it with waiting and the fight is on. Bischoff has had it and makes HHH/Batista vs. Chris Jericho/Chris Benoit. As for Edge, he can fight Randy Orton RIGHT NOW. The decision on the title can come later tonight. I think you can guess what it is based on the people put in those two matches, but let’s wait a little longer.

Edge vs. Randy Orton

The fans remind Edge that he tapped out and he’s so shaken up that Orton can shove him into the corner. They go with some amateur stuff in a bit of a surprise, followed by an exchange of missed dropkicks for a standoff. Orton goes with the hard clothesline to put Edge on the floor and we take a break.

Back with Orton grabbing a chinlock (he does love his chinlocks) for a bit until Edge gets a foot on the rope. You don’t see that as a counter to a chinlock very often but you don’t often see a heel in one for that long either. Edge gets up and baseball slides him to the floor, followed by a spear off the apron. Back in and the chinlock with a bodyscissors goes on with Orton taking his sweet time getting up.

A crossbody gives Orton two and they’re both down again (that’s happened a lot in this one). It’s Edge up first but Orton dropkicks him out of the air, followed by the backbreaker for two. The Edge-O-Matic gives Edge two of his own and it’s time to yell at the referee. Orton snaps off the powerslam but misses the high crossbody. The spear misses as well and it’s the RKO to finish Edge.

Rating: C+. Good match, but you could cut off the first ten minutes and not miss anything. These two like to go for the big epic match and it really doesn’t work all that well. Edge losing again doesn’t exactly help his case for the World Title, but we have to keep Orton hot for his title push….whenever that actually happens again.

Ric Flair lists off HHH’s accomplishments so HHH can convince Bischoff to make him champion again. Violence is threatened but here’s Batista to say that’s a bad idea. Batista wants HHH to play the game properly and show Bischoff instead of telling him. When they win tonight, Bischoff will know who the real champion is.

Christy, Melina and Maria are here with a t-shirt gun. After the announcers recap the opening sequence, here’s Gene Snitsky to interrupt, with Melina taking a few extra moments to notice him. Since no one will give him a match around here, he’d rather come out here and play with the t-shirt gun….and dance? Thankfully he reverts to monster form by grabbing Christy by the throat, because he has fun when someone is suffering.

This brings out Lita, who says Snitsky must feel like a big man right now. Despite everything Snitsky did to her, Lita is the Women’s Champion. Uh, he did like one thing to you. Anyway, Kane is coming back to deal with Snitsky. The complete non-reaction to that announcement is rather telling. Snitsky goes after Lita, who escaped behind a wall of fire.

Christian rants about Chris Jericho making him dress like a superhero last week while Candice Michelle does his makeup. Eugene comes up and gets on Christian’s nerves by saying Captain Charisma isn’t as good as Aquaman. He even asks for an autograph but gets broken up by a cameo.

Mick Foley of all people pops up and Eugene freaks out because Foley is tied for his four favorite wrestlers. It’s Foley, the Rock (Foley: “That’s a good choice.”), Papa Shango (Foley: “Ok that’s a weird one.”) and Beautiful Bobby Eaton, because he’s from right here in Huntsville, Alabama. Has Eaton ever been mentioned on Raw before? Foley leaves with Eugene, even though he stole his cheap pop. Eugene tells Christian and Tomko to have a nice day, Bang Bang.

Simon Dean is in Eric Bischoff’s office to sign his official Raw contract when Chris Benoit comes in. Dean leaves and Benoit says he worked so hard to get the title. He wants a rematch of the triple threat match for the title but Bischoff says Benoit is already in a tag match. Benoit isn’t happy and says if Bischoff gives the title back to HHH, he’ll just be showing how spineless he really is.

Chris Benoit/Chris Jericho vs. HHH/Batista

Ric Flair is here with Evolution. Benoit slugs away at HHH to start and the loud chops in the corner follow. HHH gets smart by going with the power to drive Benoit into the corner for the boot choke from Batista. It’s off to Jericho who can’t do anything with Batista either so it’s back to HHH for some more first gear grappling. A shoulder and the jumping knee to the face move things up a bit and take Jericho down, followed by a heck of a whip into the corner from Batista.

The chinlock keeps Jericho in trouble and it’s back to HHH for some choking in the corner. A delayed vertical suplex into the knee drop gives HHH one with Benoit making the save. Flair goes after the referee and gets decked by Jericho, sending him into the trademark rage. HHH calms him down though and we take a break.

Back with Benoit hitting a German suplex on HHH but missing the Swan Dive, even with Batista not being able to grab Benoit’s foot in time. HHH whips Benoit back first into the corner for two and it’s off to the abdominal stretch to cause some screaming. The assist from Batista gets HHH caught so he throws some right hands in the corner while calling spots.

HHH’s jump off the middle rope that is designed to land on a raised boot lands on a raised boot, meaning Jericho can come in. Jericho rolls Batista up for two and slips out of the Batista Bomb, setting up an enziguri. The Lionsault connects and HHH is sent to the floor, leaving Benoit to hit the Swan Dive. The Sharpshooter goes on and the saving HHH is pulled into the Crossface. That’s enough of a distraction for Batista to hit the spinebuster for the pin on Benoit.

Rating: B. This was working the formula rather well and Batista is getting better and better every week. His star power is rising as well as he gets sick of HHH, which is only going to mean great things for him. Giving him the pin like that makes things look even better, as HHH isn’t going to be happy.

Here’s Mick Foley for a chat. After all, what would Christmastime be without a Mick Foley book plug? He’s not telling you to buy it or that it’s a great Christmas gift idea though. Actually he’s here to mention that he’s going to be on Smackdown next week, because he’s going to Iraq for the Tribute to the Troops. We get a look at last week’s show and Foley mentions that he still has some John Kerry bumper stickers in his garage. The fans boo and Foley remembers that this is a red state.

Supporting the troops goes beyond political affiliation though and he’s honored to be going over there and entertain the troops. This brings out Muhammad Hassan and Daivari for something that is going to go very badly in a hurry. Hassan talks about blindly supporting the troops and the country, but then 9/11 happened.

People like the two of them are the real victims of the war and none of the people here are real patriots. Why would they support a war that causes the unfair treatment of Arab Americans? Hassan feels the “patriotism” around every airport and right now, though Foley disagrees with almost every word. Foley puts over America as the place where you can say any stupid views you want so Hassan calls Americans infidels. That’s too far for Foley, who lists off various people who were hurt or killed defending his rights. Hassan: “YOU SUPPORT AN EVIL AND UNJUST WAR!” Foley: “I SUPPORT AMERICA!”

Those rights don’t apply in the ring (Foley Island) though and if Hassan comes inside, he’ll get a fist in his mouth. Hassan and Daivari walk away again. I know it was a different time, but this stuff is as heavy handed as it gets these days, with the Love It Or Leave It stuff being a lot to take. I get where these debates have an audience, but it’s not the most interesting thing on a wrestling show.

We look back at Lita winning the Women’s Title last week.

Trish Stratus doesn’t care what the interviewer’s name is because she isn’t happy with what happened. She’ll get her title back.

Rochelle (egads another random woman on the roster) is in Bischoff’s office when Edge comes in to say he deserves the title. We hear his usual list of times where he got cheated and is told that the decision is coming tonight.

Christian/Tyson Tomko/Maven vs. Eugene/William Regal/Shelton Benjamin

Eugene backdrops Christian to start and pulls out his own version of Mr. Socko as Lawler insists that Christian could beat Aquaman. Maven and Christian both take airplane spins but Tomko takes Eugene’s head off with a clothesline. The chinlock keeps Eugene in trouble (Regal: “Come on Eug!”) and it’s back to Maven for an elbow to the head. Regal’s overly loud shouting continues as JR sucks up to the troops all over again. Eugene gets two each off a backslide and small package so Christian rips at his face.

Shelton and Regal are knocked off the apron as the announcers talk about Simon Dean. Come on the match isn’t THAT bad. Maven puts on a chinlock of his own with a knee in Eugene’s back until a Stunner breaks things up. Shelton finally comes in to start taking over and an exploder getting two on Maven as Christian makes the save. Christian gets Socko from Eugene but Maven rolls Shelton up and grabs the rope for the upset.

Rating: D. This felt a lot longer than the seven minutes it lasted. Maven’s continued push isn’t helping anything, but at least having it be in the midcard instead of the main event is a little more believable. The match wasn’t even very good as it was Eugene getting beaten until the last minute when Shelton got pinned.

HHH glares at Bischoff and then nearly begs him to return the title. He seems near tears as he talks about how important the title is to him as this is getting WAY too deep into HHH’s psyche than I’m comfortable with being. See, HHH needs to be champion so people can recognize him. Oh and it’s good for business.

Next week: the Best of 2004. Pick your favorite “that’s going to be a short show” joke.

Bischoff comes to the ring and calls for HHH, Edge and Benoit to join him. The three of them do, with Flair and Batista joining HHH. All the team does is win and the World Heavyweight Champion should be a winner. Bischoff liked the idea of another triple threat match but that’s not what he wants to do. Or maybe he could hand the belt to Edge, but that’s not a good move since Edge has never been champion before.

With that WCW philosophical line out of the way, Bischoff gets to his idea: the Elimination Chamber at New Year’s Revolution, which was the pretty clear pick the entire time. In addition to the three of them, Jericho, Batista and Orton will be involved as well. Only Batista seems to be happy as Bischoff leaves. Benoit gets beaten down so here are Jericho and Orton for the big six way brawl. Orton RKO’s Batista to stand tall to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. The longer wrestling was nice for a change, but the bigger problem here was how we spent weeks waiting to find out what is going on with the title and the answer is we wait another month. That’s going to make for some very long shows before we get to the title change, but it means they can do very little until we get to the Royal Rumble where things can actually happen. Not a terrible show, but another case of filling time until we get to what really matters.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – December 6, 2004 (2019 Redo): One Large Step For Women

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 6, 2004
Location: Cricket Arena, Charlotte, North Carolina
Attendance: 4,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the final night of the guest host series for Raw and that means Chris Jericho is in charge. He has a big plate in front of him tonight with the controversial finish to last week’s World Title match where Chris Benoit and Edge both laid claim to the title. In a bigger deal though, Trish Stratus is defending the Women’s Title against Lita in a major showdown. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with the Highlight Reel (of course) with Jericho promising a big party tonight. Since it’s a party, everyone gets laid tonight, so the leis fall from the ceiling, allowing Jericho to make some jokes about a few fans. Not wanting to be left out, he goes out and gets one himself (Jericho: “Everybody gets laid! You won’t get arrested!”). They’re imported from Hawaii, a tropical paradise, and what makes you think of the tropical paradise than Charlotte, North Carolina in December?

That’s not all though because tonight the Divas will be taking part in the Chris Jericho Rock and Roll Limbo A Go-Go, complete with music from Fozzy. With the announcements out of the way, we look at the end of last week’s show with Edge tapping just as Benoit got pinned. There’s nothing clear after several angles so Jericho needs some help. This brings out Vince McMahon, carrying the title in a better than expected visual. Vince didn’t see anything definitive either so that makes it a tie. He doesn’t like that either….so here’s a smug HHH to interrupt.

Post break, HHH isn’t exactly happy and yells at Batista for not being angry enough. Batista yells back this time, saying he was out there last week and saving HHH last week. There would be no controversy if it wasn’t for him and Benoit would be the champion. YOU’RE WELCOME! HHH turns over the coffee while shouting THANK YOU.

Jericho has a party in his office, with paint and balloons on the walls and various woman carousing. Christian comes in to rant about what looks like a superhero costume Jericho wants him to wear. Jericho loves the idea of Captain Charisma joining various other great captains, like Hook, Crunch and James T. Kirk. If Christian wants another Intercontinental Title shot, get in the costume. Christian leaves and Benoit comes in instead. He’s not happy with the situation so Jericho makes himself and Benoit against Batista/HHH, which does please Benoit.

We look at Trish tormenting Lita back in May. These segments were gold as Trish is so awesome in this role.

Eugene vs. Maven

William Regal is here with Eugene and doesn’t think much of Maven wanting a handshake. Eugene wrestles him down to start and strikes a bit of a dance as Maven certainly doesn’t seem pleased. A takedown sets up a bodyscissors with Eugene rolling him around and shaking the knees some more. Back up and Maven falls down but claims Regal tripped him, meaning an ejection. Eugene gets a northern lights suplex for two and Maven compliments him before kicking the knee out. The knee gets tied in the corner and Maven chokes until it’s a DQ.

Rating: D. Now this is more Maven’s speed and I didn’t get nearly as annoyed as I did before. Maven against someone like Eugene is something I can buy, unlike watching him against main event level talent. The heel turn isn’t likely to revitalize his career but at least he’s not in way over his head.

Post match Regal comes back in but gets decked by a title belt.

And now, a limbo contest with the Divas. Fozzy plays music, the girls limbo, Christy wins, and Jericho starts singing with Fozzy as we have a dance off. The lights go out though and it’s Muhammad Hassan and Daivari coming up on the screen. Hassan goes on about how great things can be before a single instance can change everything. Like on 9/11. He’ll be here next week and the party will stop. Better than limbo at least.

Simon Dean vs. Hurricane

This is Dean’s in-ring debut but first he needs to talk about the Fit-No-Powder. Hurricane cuts him off, but Dean is smart enough to just talk over the music. Dean offers him an amateur position and gets rolled up for an early two. A front facelock has Dean in the corner but he comes out with a right hand. Lawler: “Well you know what they say.” JR: “What do they say?” Lawler: “Uh…..”

Dean takes him down and a pendulum elbow sets up a pushup choke. We hit the chinlock with a knee in Hurricane’s back as Lawler compares him to the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. He wishes. Hurricane comes back with a clothesline and headscissors, followed by the reverse Unprettier. The Shining Wizard misses though and Dean grabs a rollup with tights for the pin.

Rating: D+. Just a match here as Dean’s run continues to die before our eyes. It’s not working and a feud with Hurricane and Rosey isn’t going to fix things. They tried something and it isn’t clicking, but at least they’re keeping him down low on the card and giving him a win. I wouldn’t get my hopes up though.

We see Trish’s bridal shower for Lita as the gold continues.

Randy Orton is happy with the World Title situation and laughs at Coach for not being able to get laid.

Here’s an angry Edge for a chat. He’s here to defend his World Title and now it’s vacant. The fans tell him that he tapped out as he explains what happened last week, albeit with a bit of a twist that puts him in a pretty positive light. Even Lawler can’t give him the benefit of the doubt on this one as Edge talks about how great it felt to have the World Title in his hands.

This is all Randy Orton’s fault because Orton didn’t do the right thing last week. It’s not his fault that Orton’s title reign was a failure so Orton needs to get out here right now. Cue Orton with the shirt coming off on the way down the ramp. He could have made it a singles match last week with Benoit vs. HHH instead so Edge should be grateful. They’ve been here before and Edge only has himself to blame. Edge is the only failure around here but Edge can’t remember all the times he’s beaten Orton. Edge declares Orton his b**** and the fight is on with agents breaking it up.

Intercontinental Title: Shelton Benjamin vs. Captain Charisma

The Captain (Christian in a superhero costume if you aren’t paying attention) looks a bit like Daredevil with yellow trim. Shelton starts laughing at him and holds his hand out to stop a charge. Tyson Tomko gets on the apron for a distraction, even though it doesn’t seem to change anything as Christian takes over anyway. Shelton is right back with the top rope clothesline but Tomko forearms him in the back to really take over.

An abdominal stretch stays on the ribs but Christian lets it go and misses a charge into the corner. Christian gets punched out of the air and a middle rope sunset flip gets two. The Stinger Splash misses but Shelton lands on the ropes, only to get powerbombed down for two. Tomko gets involved again by throwing in the title, allowing him to boot Shelton in the face for two more. Shelton kicks Christian in the head to mess up the mask, setting up the exploder to retain.

Rating: D+. This could have been worse and it’s not like Shelton is going to run out of challengers. Christian has already been beaten a few times so this was hardly some big waste of a chance. The idea was funny enough, but with the Hurricane and Rosey already on the show, the superhero deal isn’t exactly an original idea.

Post match Jericho comes out and makes Orton vs. Edge for next week. As a bonus, he sings the Goodbye Song to Christian. For some reason, this isn’t included on the Network. With all the music stuff they do, that’s a copyright issue?

Smackdown Rebound (also not on the Network).

Next up: Trish interrupts Lita’s wedding. That outfit makes this roughly 14 times better.

Snitsky cuts Lita off in the back and takes credit for ruining Kane’s career. Tonight is Lita’s big night and it’s a shame her baby isn’t here to cheer her on.

We recap the World Title being vacated.

HHH calls Bischoff but gets the answering machine. The message turns into a plug for the book and Raw Magazine with Flair acting as pitchman. Batista comes in and hangs up the phone, pointing out how it’s kind of stupid to threaten the guy who handles the World Title situation. There is only one World Champion but Batista doesn’t say who that is. Flair: “He’s talking about you!”

HHH/Batista vs. Chris Benoit/Chris Jericho

Lilian Garcia introduces HHH as the former World Champion so he chases her into the crowd. Benoit chops at Batista to start as they ride out the WE WANT FLAIR chants. It’s off to HHH, who gets chopped by both Canadians and suplexed by Benoit for two. The Crossface is broken up due to feet in the ropes and Batista adds a save. The fans still want Flair but settle for Jericho punching HHH down.

A whip over the corner puts HHH on the floor and a double dropkick sends Batista out next to him. Back from a break with Batista putting Jericho in a camel clutch after hitting a spinebuster during the break. Evolution takes turns stomping Jericho in the corner with Batista adding a boot choke. Jericho dropkicks the knee out to send Batista face first into the middle buckle and it’s the hot tag to Benoit.

Everything breaks down and Benoit decks Flair from the apron, which the fans don’t exactly like. Batista gets knocked off the apron though and Benoit rolls the German suplexes on HHH, which the fans like a lot more. The Lionsault sets up the Swan Dive into the Walls/Crossface combination but Batista makes the save. Another spinebuster drops Benoit but HHH hits him with a chair for the rather dumb DQ.

Rating: C+. The energy was there and HHH snapping is a good enough story. This is part of the bigger story though, even if it’s all but destined to end with HHH as champion again. Batista’s frustrations are starting to grow though and that is a good sign for the future. They’re taking the slow burn path and that’s best for everyone.

Post match HHH chairs Benoit (who is gushing blood) again and loads up one on Jericho, only to hit Batista by mistake. Jericho takes a shot of his own and HHH checks on Batista. Flair holds Batista’s head and HHH leaves, ranting about the title.

Some production guys check out Trish as she bends over for a stretch. After they’re scared off, Lita comes in and Trish asks whose career she’s ending tonight. Lita says yours and kisses Trish. Lawler’s reaction is much more subdued than you would expect.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Lita

Trish is defending and Lita looks very happy to be in her hometown. They lock up to start and fall to the floor as JR gets on Lawler for worrying about Trish’s nose. JR: “We’ll have a parade for her next week.” Back in and Lita knocks her to the floor, setting up the suicide dive with Lita landing on her head and thankfully not dying. A shot with the mask gives Trish two and JR goes off on Lawler again, this time for being glad to see Trish’s face. Trish pulls her up for the choke in the corner until Lita snapmares her way out.

The sleeper is broken up though and we hit the seated full nelson. Lita fights up and catches Trish on top, meaning it’s a top rope superplex for the double knockdown. The delayed cover gets two and Trish is right back with a kick to the head. Right hands in the corner are countered with a powerbomb but Trish grabs the rope to block the snap DDT. Stratusfaction is countered into the reverse Twist of Fate and the moonsault gives Lita the pin and the title for her first reign in four years.

Rating: B. There was a great energy here and the fans wanted to see Lita FINALLY beat Trish and take the title. That’s because they spent time setting this story up and it made the payoff that much better. It’s a big deal and felt like an important moment because WWE treated it like an important moment. This was the main event of the show and that’s not something you saw very often at this point.

Overall Rating: C-. The last half hour nearly saved the show with a hot angle and a very good main event. Other than that though, it was another week of waiting for another show as we still don’t get the big moment. They’ll wait for January to actually give us anything in the annual December Doesn’t Matter push and that’s something you knew was coming.

The main event is what really matters here as it would be the benchmark for the women’s division for over ten years. This match was the main event of Monday Night Raw and treated like the biggest thing on the show, which just did not happen at this point. I know they’ve been surpassed and lapped several times, but Lita and Trish really did take the division to a place it hadn’t been in the modern era here and that’s worthy of some praise.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – November 29, 2004: You Were Expecting Something Clear?

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 29, 2004
Location: 1st Mariner Arena, Baltimore, Maryland
Attendance: 5,300
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re in week three of Team Orton running the show and in this case it’s Randy Orton himself in charge. His first order of business: HHH defending the World Title in a battle royal, which should all but guarantee a new champion. Now let’s see how our beloved champion gets to outsmart everyone this week. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Raw World Title: Battle Royal

Edge, Gene Snitsky, Ric Flair, Steven Richards, Tyson Tomko, Rob Conway, Sylvan Grenier, Jonathan Coachman, Christian, Shelton Benjamin, Viscera, Rhyno, Eugene, Chris Benoit, Maven, Tajiri, Rosey, William Regal, Batista, Chris Jericho, Val Venis, HHH

The fight starts before Batista comes out, so we watch that in full and come back to everyone standing still again. Hold on though as here’s Vince McMahon to say that this isn’t happening due to reasons of anyone can win. Can you imagine someone like Steven Richards as the World Champion? It’s a #1 contenders match instead, but the winner will get their shot tonight so you’re still getting a title match.

Battle Royal

Edge, Gene Snitsky, Ric Flair, Steven Richards, Tyson Tomko, Rob Conway, Sylvan Grenier, Jonathan Coachman, Christian, Shelton Benjamin, Viscera, Rhyno, Eugene, Chris Benoit, Maven, Tajiri, Rosey, William Regal, Batista, Chris Jericho, Val Venis

Everyone starts fighting as Edge chills on the steps without ever having gotten in. Hurricane dives at Viscera for some reason but since Viscera isn’t that bright, he can’t throw him out just yet. A bunch of people get together and toss Viscera, followed by Tajiri eliminating his own partner Rhyno. Tomko is out next and Maven gets rid of Grenier, only to get tossed by Eugene. Back from a break with Benoit and Edge chopping it out in the middle of the ring and Coach having eliminated himself rather than be chopped by Benoit again.

Regal and Rosey both go out at Snitsky’s hands, followed by Batista tossing Hurricane. That means a Snitsky vs. Batista showdown until everyone else breaks it up due to reasons of wrestling stupidity. Batista starts cleaning house, including tossing Eugene, Tajiri, Christian, Venis and Flair in just a few seconds. The fans are WAY into that as we take a break. Back again with Jericho dropkicking Snitsky out, leaving us with Jericho, Benoit, Richards, Edge, Benjamin and Batista.

Richards starts celebrating and gets beaten down to leave us with five. Shelton unloads on Edge in the corner as JR is on fire with the over the top call here. The stomping goes on a bit too long though and Edge sends Benjamin to the apron, setting up a spear for the elimination. Jericho charges at Batista and gets tossed, leaving Benoit to German suplex Edge. Benoit low bridges Batista out though and we’re down to the two Canadians. They both wind up on the apron and fall to the floor for the double elimination.

Rating: D+. So there’s the latest version of the double winner battle royal as we set up a likely triple threat match tonight. The match was far longer than it needed to be, though they got us down to a good collection of talent at the end. Having it come after a bait and switch certainly didn’t help either.

In the back, two referees both tell Randy Orton what they think they saw, which of course is a split decision. The referees leave and Vince comes in to tell Orton that it’s his call. Edge comes in to plead his case, offering Orton a title shot if he gets to face HHH tonight. Orton says he’ll think about it, which isn’t good enough for Edge. The boss leaves and Edge is furious.

Maven is annoyed that he hasn’t won anything in the last few weeks. Eugene comes in and asks for help putting his Tag Team Title on. That’s too far for Maven and Shelton Benjamin has to get between them. After four years of work, Maven doesn’t have anything and Eugene can’t even spell title. Eugene spells title so Maven goes after him, with William Regal breaking it up. Maven sits back down.

Candice Michelle stops Orton to ask if her new dress is appropriate. Orton approves, but here’s Benoit to demand the title shot tonight. Benoit would win the title if he had the chance and so he wants his chance. Orton promises to fix things.

Here’s Orton to fix things. Well in a minute as first he announces Regal/Eugene vs. La Resistance for the Tag Team Titles and Jerry Lawler (the birthday King) vs. Ric Flair. Other than that, we can have a triple threat match with Benoit and Edge challenging HHH for the title. I’ve heard worse ideas, though not many less interesting.

Lawler goes to get ready so Jonathan Coachman takes his place.

Lita/Victoria vs. Molly Holly/Trish Stratus

The villains jump them from behind and it’s Victoria getting suplexed down. Trish comes in to start kicking at the arm as the announcers go over HHH’s odds to retain the title. It’s back to Molly for a swinging neckbreaker as the back of Victoria’s trunks has torn, which is made even worse given how small they were in the first place. Molly cuts off the comeback with a kick to the ribs and it’s a stomping down in the corner.

The running seated dropkick gets two and a running elbow keeps Victoria away from Lita again. The Chick Kick is blocked and now it’s off to Lita, meaning Trish gets to panic. Lita can’t quite hit a running splash in the corner so it’s a snap suplex instead. A sleeper has Trish in trouble but Molly makes the save and sends Victoria outside. Molly gets knocked out as well though and it’s the snap DDT to finish Trish.

Rating: D+. This could have been a lot worse and the fans are wanting to see Lita take Trish’s head off when she gets the chance. It was a smart move to keep things short at Survivor Series, because the build wasn’t quite done just yet. That was some smart storytelling and they could get some extra mileage out of this story for a better result.

Muhammad Hassan and Daivari montage, with clips of their previous rants.

Ric Flair vs. Jerry Lawler

This is billed as a Legends Match. JR mentions Lawler’s resume and major title wins, which is a good thing to bring up every now and then. How many younger fans see Lawler as an old guy and not a wrestler? Lawler mocks the strut to start and gets shoved, so it’s a slap to Flair’s face. Flair gets knocked down and that’s another strut from Lawler. A slugout goes to Lawler and we get the required Flair Flop.

Flair gets in a cheap shot out of the corner and the comeback is on, including the knee drop. The comeback takes all of two seconds as Lawler elbows him in the face and hits the middle rope fist drop. As you probably saw coming though, Lawler bangs up his knee on the way down though and Flair is rather pleased. A chop block sets up the Figure Four with a grab of the ropes to make Lawler tap.

Rating: D+. There wasn’t much to it but these two know how to do a paint by numbers match in their sleep. The fans are always going to react to Lawler because he’s one of the all time great performers and has forgotten more about working a crowd than most of the modern roster will ever know. Yeah they’re both old and the match was just a quick filler, but you can see the knowledge and talent on full display.

Melina has been signed as the newest Raw Diva and she hugs Orton for giving her the chance. Melina: “If there’s anything I can do to thank you for the favor, let me know.” Maria comes in as well and Orton has an idea. They won’t be wrestling, but they’ll be in the ring doing something.

Wrestlemania Recall: Benoit wins the title.

We get another Shelton Benjamin video, this time talking about all of the drug issues in his hometown. He was in the middle of firefights and got out as soon as he could. Eventually he found his way out through sports, which got him to college.

With the emotional story out of the way, here is Orton, flanked by Maria, Candice and Melina. Orton thinks we need more hot women though so here are Christy Hemme and Stacy Keibler. So why are they here? Lingerie fashion show. There isn’t much to say here as they all strip, they all look good, they dance rather close to Orton and they all get cheered. A group hug wraps it up.

Is this supposed to make us want to like Orton? The tall, handsome wrestler who gets to hit on the gorgeous women that he probably could get regularly? Orton added nothing to this segment and it could have been anyone running the thing to the same result. This was over ten minutes long, or longer than anything but the battle royal tonight. I get the appeal, but could you be a little more subtle with this stuff?

Tag Team Titles: La Resistance vs. William Regal/Eugene

Regal and Eugene are defending. Eugene shoulders Conway down to start as we hear about the lingerie from the previous segment being auctioned off on WWE.com. As I shake my head, it’s Regal coming in and getting taken to the mat in a bit of a surprise. Eugene gets knocked off the apron and it’s time to Hulk Up, after a legal tag of course. House is cleaned but the crowd is dead after the previous segment. The airplane spin has Conway in trouble and the top rope ax handle gets two. Au Revoir is broken up and it’s a Stunner to finish Grenier.

Rating: D+. The wrestling was watchable for such a short match but the lack of a reaction was really noticeable. There’s only so much you can do when your crowd is dead after a segment like the previous one and there was nothing these guys could do. It’s almost like the fans came to a wrestling show to see wrestling and not a long segment that didn’t add anything to the show.

Post match Eugene brings the kids in to celebrate but Maven runs out and sends him into the steps.

Trish thinks Chris Jericho finds the face mask funny but Jericho thinks she looks great. He also finds it funny that she called Lita the walking Kiss of Death but tonight, the walking KOD beat the walking STD. Next week, Lita gets her title shot.

How to bid on lingerie!

Flair and Batista yell at each other over the battle royal. Good thing they waited an hour and a half to have this talk. HHH comes in to rant about the triple threat but both of them calm him down. Batista sounds a little tentative when he says he has HHH’s back.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Chris Benoit vs. Edge

HHH is defending. Benoit goes after Edge as the champ chills in the corner, watching as Edge knocks Benoit to the floor. Back in and HHH knocks Edge to the floor and whips Benoit chest first into the corner for a pair of twos. Edge comes in again and it’s time for Benoit to take over with some alternating chops. A double clothesline puts Edge and HHH on the floor, setting up a double dive to take them both down again as we take a break.

We come back with HHH down on the floor and Benoit putting Edge in the Sharpshooter. HHH’s save attempt is countered into the Crossface but here are Flair and Batista to make the save. Orton comes out to eject both of them, leaving HHH to hit a spinebuster for two on Edge. Benoit comes back in for the suplexes, setting up the Sharpshooter to Edge’s already banged up back.

Instead of immediately saving, HHH posts Orton first and then breaks things up. HHH gets taken down again and it’s more rolling German suplexes on Edge. Benoit goes up top but has to knock Edge away, giving us a ref bump. The chair is brought in but Orton takes it away from HHH and chairs him over the barricade. Edge is back up for the spear, which is countered into a Crossface with another referee running in. That’s reversed with a rollup that doesn’t break the hold, meaning he taps out at the same time the referee counts three for the double finish.

Rating: C+. There was good action but I rolled my eyes a bit at the match having the same kind of ending as the opener, even with the same people. I’m sure this will set up something else down the line, because that’s what this whole story has been since Survivor Series: a bunch of stuff that makes you wait until next time without giving you anything concrete.

The two referees and the two Canadians argue over who wins to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. A bunch of mostly bad wrestling with Orton offering nothing as the boss for the night makes this another weak show. At least something kind of happened in the main event, but we’re sorry because your definitive deal is on another episode. Benoit vs. Edge for the title is what makes sense and if you think that’s what we’re getting, you haven’t been paying enough attention.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – November 22, 2004: One Of The Funniest Things WWE Has Ever Done

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 22, 2004
Location: HSBC Arena, Buffalo, New York
Attendance: 6,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s time to continue the Survivor Series fallout, this time with someone else running the show. Last week’s Maven Show is going to be hard to beat as Maven challenging for the title wasn’t fooling anyone. At least that’s out of the way now and we can stop pretending that Maven is anywhere near that level. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open in the locker room with Shelton getting ready for his match when Trish Stratus comes in wearing a towel. She asks where he’s off to looking so pretty. That would be a six man tag because William Regal and Tajiri need him. Trish asks about her needs but Shelton thinks she’ll find someone else. An aghast Vince McMahon comes in and freaks out because it’s a woman in a towel. It’s scandalous because the moral fabric of America is being pulled apart by the sexual and racial overtones. Shelton: “EXCUSE ME?”

Vince: “Well Shelton, you may not realize this but you’re an African American. And everyone knows that African Americans are attracted to attractive white Canadian women with broken noses!” Vince goes on a rant about how this isn’t the NFL or the NBA where such actions could send Shelton into the audience in a violent rage. Shelton tells Vince to lighten up and the towel comes down as the Monday Night Football theme plays. Vince can’t kiss her because of the nose guard so he looks to the camera and asks if we’re ready for some wrestling.

So for those of you who weren’t watching American television in 2004, there was a Desperate Housewives vignette that aired before a Monday Night Football game, featuring Nicolette Sheridan and Terrell Owens doing the same thing. This was treated as the biggest disgrace in the history of television with people freaking out over a WOMAN IN A TOWEL (ok it was more her dropping the towel). It was stupid and completely overblown, though this opening has always been one of my favorites. Vince informing Shelton that he’s African American cracks me up every time as Shelton just looks lost.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Chris Benoit, who is in charge this week. He loves the idea of more wrestling and wants to simplify things tonight. There is a contract on his door and anyone who wanted a match tonight just had to sign up. Some people have already signed up so tonight it’s Maven vs. Gene Snitsky, Batista vs. Chris Jericho, Trish Stratus defending the Women’s Title against Lita and Molly Holly, and Jonathan Coachman against JR. We need a main event though and as luck would have it, there’s a steel cage above the ring. As you might have guessed, Benoit himself will be challenging HHH for the World Title inside that cage.

Maven vs. Gene Snitsky

Maven is still banged up but is fine enough to snap Snitsky’s throat across the top rope on his way in. A dropkick sends Snitsky out to the floor and seems to annoy him more than anything else. Snitsky pulls him down and crushes Maven’s head against the post for two as the announcers talk about how Maven should have joined Evolution last week (egads people let it go).

A half crab keeps Maven down and Snitsky slides him across the mat into the post. Maven can barely do that right as the slide is in slow motion. Snitsky misses a charge and Maven hits a high crossbody for two, followed by the top rope bulldog for the same. A big boot cuts Maven down though and it’s the pumphandle slam to give Snitsky the pin.

Rating: D. What else were you expecting? Neither of these two are worth much in the ring, though at least Snitsky beat him pretty decisively. It’s not working with Maven and WWE is right to move him back down the card where he belongs. Snitsky doesn’t have the highest ceiling in the world, but it’s a lot higher than Maven’s, at least right now.

HHH is panicking over the cage match but Batista says they have his back. That doesn’t work well because Batista has been screwing up left and right lately. Ric Flair tries to calm things down but HHH says the point of this team is to keep the title on him. HHH bets that Batista is losing tonight. They separate and things aren’t good.

Here’s Stacy Keibler to shoot t-shirts into the crowd. She pulls out a copy of the Rise and Fall of ECW DVD but that brings out Simon Dean to interrupt. He thinks the people need a DVD that they could actually use. It’s a Simon System DVD, which the people need to protect themselves around Thanksgiving. Women like Stacy are interested in men like him, because he’s actually in shape. Stacy says no because he looks in the mirror more than she does, which doesn’t sit well with him. Threats are made so here’s Hurricane for the save. Simon beats him down with the weightlifting belt so Rosey makes the real save.

Two women (Candace Michelle and Melina) are in the back talking about Batista and HHH when Batista and Flair (Flair: “Maybe later ladies.”) come by with Batista ranting about how he can beat Jericho and he’ll prove it tonight.

Batista vs. Chris Jericho

Rating: D+. This was starting to get somewhere but they were smart to end it that way. Batista looks like the monster who was out to prove himself at all cost, which is exactly what they should have done. Jericho didn’t get squashed, but the point here was to make Batista look like the Animal and that’s what they did.

Post match Batista lays Jericho out with the big clothesline to the back of the head.

Post break, HHH sarcastically claps for Batista and asks for his $100. Batista doesn’t want to hear it because he walked out while HHH got carried out. HHH doesn’t like it because he wanted Batista to win. Batista has a million dollar body and a ten cent brain and if HHH needs to find a replacement, he’ll have no problem getting one. Flair is sent to talk to the livid Batista, but he tells HHH to back off.

Edge looks at a clip of him attacking Christian last week while shouting that it wasn’t his fault. He’s a lone wolf now and deserves a shot at the World Title, but Benoit is getting his own shot. Everyone knows he’s earned a shot so let’s take a poll of people in the back about whether Edge should get a shot at the title. Christy Hemme says no so Edge tells her to apologize to her mirror every morning. A production guy says no because he voted for Shawn Michaels at Taboo Tuesday. Edge is about to kill him so here’s Benoit to break it up. Edge storms off instead.

Jonathan Coachman vs. Jim Ross

Hang on though as Benoit pops up on screen to say that there has been a misunderstanding. See, Coach wrote JR on the signup sheet, which Benoit thought meant Just Rhyno.

Jonathan Coachman vs. Rhyno

Coach gets in a microphone shot and some right hands before the Gore finishes him in less than thirty seconds.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Lita vs. Molly Holly

Trish is defending in fallout from Lita getting beaten down by the two of them. The heel alliance starts early and they take turns choking Lita on the ropes. Lita slips out of a double suplex and grabs Trish’s mask. A double clothesline in the corner has Molly and Trish in more trouble but Trish is right back with a middle rope clothesline.

Lita gets in a quick rollup for two before hammering on the champ in the corner. Trish’s face is slammed into the mat but Molly throws Lita outside. The Molly Go Round connects with Lita diving back in for the save, followed by the hard DDT to Molly. Trish makes her own save and steals the pin to retain.

Rating: C. The match might have been a little sloppy and short, but they were showing an extra fire that you don’t often get from the women’s division of this era. Trish vs. Lita is building up rather well and as soon as Lita can keep her head on straight, she should be running through Trish for the title in a nice moment.

Post match Lita chokes Trish out and grabs at the mask again.

Flair tries to calm Batista down again as Batista gets his arm wrapped up, saying everyone goes through something like this. When HHH is ready to leave, Batista is ready to be the man. That’s not worth it to Batista, who is tired of waiting his turn. Flair: “I’VE BEEN TIRED FOR THIRTY TWO YEARS!” Flair doesn’t want this to turn into another Orton situation, but Batista says he wouldn’t regret it.

Video on Shelton Benjamin’s hometown, which included a lot of drug dealings and violence. Shelton got into trouble when he was in high school and was even a shoplifter who carried a gun with him to school. He got expelled, but he’s not proud of it. Rather random video, but these are effective most of the time, which was the case here.

Shelton Benjamin/William Regal/Eugene vs. La Resistance/Christian

Tyson Tomko is here with the villains. Regal gets taken into the wrong corner to start but Grenier is right back with a snapmare to take over. It’s off to Eugene for a headlock but he’s taken into the corner as well, allowing Christian to snap the back of his neck across the top rope. The choking begins and Conway makes it even worse by grabbing Eugene in a reverse chinlock (like a neckbreaker but with pulling instead of dropping).

Since it’s another chinlock, Eugene gets out without much effort and brings Shelton in to clean house. The top rope clothesline gets two on Conway with Tomko breaking up the cover. La Resistance hits a Hart Attack for two on Benjamin but Regal wrecks both of them. Eugene Stuns Conway into the exploder to give Benjamin the pin

Rating: C-. Completely watchable match here with the two feuds (Are these feuds?) being thrown into a single match for the sake of simplicity. Regal and Eugene are a fun team and while they’re not going to hold the titles very long, they’re a nice pickup every week. Benjamin on the other hand is looking like a star every time he’s out there.

Eugene brings the kids in for the post match dance.

Muhammad Hassan and Daivari complain about travel and threaten to beat respect into anyone who gets in his way.

Smackdown Rebound.

The cage is lowered.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Chris Benoit

Chris Benoit vs. Edge

Inside a cage. Benoit starts swinging right away and takes Edge into the corner for the chops. A hard whip takes Benoit down though and Edge gets a chance to hammer away for a change. Edge starts going after the back so Benoit sends him face first into the cage. There’s a baseball slide to drive Edge into the cage as this is more about the violence so far than the win. Edge slips out of a Crossface attempt and sends Benoit shoulder first into the post.

Benoit is right back with a catapult into the buckle for two as JR compares this to being trained in the Dungeon. Something tells me there weren’t a lot of catapults into buckles in there. A good crotching slows Benoit down and Edge kicks away in the Tree of Woe. They collide in the corner as Batista is shown watching in the back. We come back from a break with Edge chinlocking a bloody Benoit.

With that not working so well, Edge hammers away with right hands and sends him into the cage again. It’s still too early to escape though as Benoit pulls him back down, sending Edge face first into the buckle. The rolling Germans are on with Benoit hitting five in a row this time. Now it’s Benoit’s chance to go up but Edge makes a save of his own.

Rating: B-. Nice cage match but going from what was supposed to be a World Title match to this didn’t do it any favors. Edge messing up again and costing himself the big win will fuel his rage all the more, but does this really change anything? There’s no storyline advancement for this and Benoit winning is just a consolation prize.

Batista tells Flair he’s going to the ring and wants to see HHH out there. Flair needs to decide whose side he’s on.

They even pay off the doctor, who HHH says was worth every penny. HHH wasn’t going to fight in a cage because Benoit was running the shoe. He explains the entire play (which doesn’t have that many steps) and gives the MVP award to Batista. That was a performance worthy of an Academy Award (IT’S AN EMMY BECAUSE IT’S ON TELEVISION!!! STOP GETTING THAT WRONG!!!). HHH: “Or at least a Slammy!”

After posing with the title, HHH calls out the women but gets Randy Orton instead. He’s in charge next week, which doesn’t scare HHH because Orton can’t get a title match. Orton has two options for HHH: they face off one on one next week and if Orton wins, that stipulation is gone. HHH cuts him off before the second option is read and says no, so Orton goes with option #2: HHH defends the title in a battle royal. The roster comes out to the stage so the champ can panic to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. The matches did get better as the show went on, but there is no hiding the fact that nothing is happening at the moment. We’ve literally gone two weeks and the biggest development is Regal and Eugene winning the Tag Team Titles. HHH has had to defend the title against Maven and tonight he gets to be the genius who keeps the title again. You know there are going to be shenanigans next week as well, because that’s what this show is all about anymore. Nothing happened on this show, and that seems to be by design.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – November 15, 2004: Eyebrows Huffman

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 15, 2004
Location: Conseco Fieldhouse, Indianapolis, Indiana
Attendance: 5,500
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the night after Survivor Series and that means it’s time for Team Orton to take over the show for the next four weeks. Assuming it’s not Randy Orton’s week to be in charge, you can all but guarantee the boss for the week getting a World Title shot against HHH. Then repeat that for two of the next three weeks. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

La Resistance is in the ring to open the show but here’s the still bandaged Maven to cut them off. He’s in charge tonight (at least they’re getting it out of the way) and has a few matches in mind. Edge and Christian will be teaming up to face Chris Benoit and Shelton Benjamin, JR will be facing Jonathan Coachman, and in a match close to Maven’s heart, Christy Hemme will face Stacy Keibler in a lingerie pillow fight. Oh and for the main event: Maven gets a World Title shot. As for La Resistance, they have a title defense right now.

Tag Team Titles: La Resistance vs. Rhyno/Tajiri vs. William Regal/Eugene

La Resistance is defending and this is under elimination rules. Rhyno hiptosses Conway to start but gets forearmed in the face for his efforts. A suplex gets Rhyno out of trouble and it’s off to Tajiri for the first time. Eugene gets to come in to snapmare Tajiri down for one but the airplane spin is countered into a rolling sunset flip. Another exchange of rollups gets two each but Lawler would rather talk about the pillow fight.

Back from a quick break with Eugene riding Tajiri around like a horse before running around in a circle. Conway tags himself back in so Tajiri fires off some kicks to the champs. Grenier’s suplex gets two and let’s talk about that pillow fight some more. Rhyno comes back in for some shoulders but the Gore misses in the corner, allowing Conway to grab a rollup with Grenier holding the foot from the floor for the elimination.

We’re down to two and Eugene’s ram into the corner just wakes him up. The power of French Canadians bring him back down though as Lawler thinks Regal is named Steven. A Rock Bottom drops Grenier and the hot tag brings in Regal to elbow the champs in the face. Everything breaks down and Conway hits Grenier with the flag by mistake. The knee trembler from Regal sets up the People’s Elbow from Eugene for the pin and the titles.

Rating: C-. Pretty dull match for the most part but the feel good moment at the end was nice. The problem is that Eugene has lost so much fire over the last few months that it doesn’t have quite the same spark. This should have been the big finale for Eugene and then have Regal lose the fall when they drop the titles. As it is it’s fun, but otherwise it could have been a great moment.

Post match Eugene brings in some fans for some fun, with Regal being more than willing to get involved.

Post break Regal dedicates the win to his father and says they’ll bring prestige back to the titles. Cue Eugene to pour chocolate milk over Regal and Maria. Regal seems to like it on her and Eugene comes back in, seemingly impressed as well. Regal: “STOP IT! YOU’LL GO BLIND! I on the other hand don’t mind losing one eye.” And he leaves with Maria.

Maven hits on Candice Michelle (Has she debuted yet?) before going into his office where HHH is waiting. He offers Maven a spot on the team if he’ll drop the match but Maven turns him down. Maven has to be banged up tonight but he’s willing to fight anyway. That’s why HHH wants him on the team, because that beatdown from Snitsky never would have happened if he was part of Evolution.

Everyone around here hates HHH because he tells the truth. Tonight, it’s a long shot for Maven but he could take the sure thing. Maven isn’t sure this time to end this after nearly five minutes. That’s four and a half minutes more than HHH should spend worrying about Maven. Seriously: it’s just Maven. Why is HHH sweating him?

Lita vs. Molly Holly

Lita goes aggressive with some knees to the ribs to start and follows them up with some stomping. A snap suplex gets Molly out of trouble and she pulls at Lita’s face. Lita’s Russian legsweep gets two as Lawler talks about her being a rather unscrupulous woman. Lita has had it with the covers and grabs a sleeper….for a submission. You don’t see that too often.

Post match here’s Trish Stratus, with a nose guard, after having it broken last night. She wants to fight right now with an assist from Molly, who gets DDT’d before Trish can get to Lita. That earns Trish a shove in the mask and Lita smiles as Trish panics.

Jonathan Coachman vs. Jim Ross

Coach is rather pleased with this but here’s Maven, who has made a mistake. Here’s the real match.

Jonathan Coachman vs. Randy Orton

Coach tries to run (JR tripping him didn’t help) and gets caught hiding behind the barricade. Orton tosses him back in for a crotching on the rope, setting up a poke to the eye and an RKO for the pin. Short and harmless.

Edge isn’t happy that he has to team with Christian again because he should be facing HHH for the World Title. Christian doesn’t like that so Edge flips off the camera, which sends us to a graphic of the tag match. Middle fingers aren’t allowed?

Orton talks to Maven about the World Title shot, but Maven isn’t sure about joining the team. That’s not cool with Orton, who explains how bad it can be. Maven brings up all of the success Orton had on the team and that sounds good.

Edge/Christian vs. Shelton Benjamin/Chris Benoit

Tomko is out with the Canadians. Christian jumps Benoit who is right back with the knee to the ribs as we cut to Edge for some reason. What’s with the cuts involving anything he does tonight? A double tag lets Edge hammer on Shelton and a clothesline keeps Benjamin down. Christian comes back in and makes the mistake of trying a monkey flip, allowing Shelton to stick the landing and snap off a powerslam.

It’s off to Benoit, who sends Edge running to the floor. Christian and Edge argue so it’s a double baseball slide to send them into the barricade and us to a break. It’s so strange to see Edge and Christian arguing. Brothers/friends/probably cousins at some point shouldn’t fight like that. Back with Edge working on Shelton’s arm with a cross armbreaker of all things, followed by a double hiptoss for two.

Christian stays on the arm for a bit until Edge’s assisted charge in the corner only hits the buckle. The Dragon Whip drops Edge and it’s off to Benoit as everything breaks down. Benoit German suplexes Christian and Edge spears Tomko by mistake. That means more German suplexes to Edge and an exploder from Shelton to Christian. The Swan Dive into the Crossface gives Benoit the tap.

Rating: B. Good action and the right finish here with Edge being protected and Benoit getting a win to keep him hot before he (likely) gets a World Title shot in a few weeks. If Raw has one strength right now, it’s being able to throw a wide range of people together for good tag matches and that’s what they did right here.

Post match Edge snaps again and beats up Christian.

Ric Flair comes in to see Maven and offers him a few ladies to help him with his decision. Maven doesn’t look sure.

Lawler and JR pitch aftershave.

Christy Hemme vs. Stacy Keibler

Lingerie pillow fight. They’re in lingerie, they hit each other with pillows and Christy wins. Why a bed was necessary in the ring isn’t clear. Why WWE had a bed on hand isn’t clear.

HHH and Batista admire the women and HHH makes fun of him for thinking. Batista doesn’t get the offer to Maven but thinks HHH might be scared. You don’t suggest that to HHH but he has a plan: who would you rather face for the World Title? If Maven wrestles for the title, the locker room will empty out to make him champion because he would be easy pickings. Makes sense actually. HHH makes fun of Batista’s intelligence again and there’s a future in that glare back.

Here’s Simon Dean, who thankfully has his customer in the ring this time. The customer is morbidly obese and in failing health (Dean’s words) so let’s start the Simon System. That begins with helping his nutrition, but he doesn’t like the Simon Bars. Dean is crushed, but here’s Rosey to interrupt. Dean doesn’t waste time here and calls Rosey fat so Rosey shoves a protein bar in Dean’s mouth. The customer gets pulled in and Dean hits Rosey in the head with a bottle of protein powder. We’ve spent three weeks on this to set up a feud with ROSEY?

Smackdown Rebound.

Jericho and Benoit come in to see Maven, making the girls leave. Maven still can’t make up his mind so Benoit asks how long he’s been wrestling. That would be three and a half years, which is a lot shorter than the eighteen years it took Benoit to get to the World Title. It’s not about the cars and the women because it can be about being World Champion.

Wrestlemania Recall: The Boyhood Dream has come true.

Muhammad Hassan introduces us to his uncle, who owns a store. Since 9/11, everything has changed and now he has to close up because no one will give him a chance. That won’t happen to Hassan, because he’ll beat the prejudice out of him. If necessary, he will lead a revolt against his own country. This is already going south and he hasn’t even debuted.

Here are Evolution to ask Maven for his decision. Maven has been thinking about it all night but has made up his mind.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Maven

Maven is challenging in case you’re a little slow this week. Batista and Flair get on the apron at the bell so here are Benoit and Jericho to even things up. A hiptoss and dropkick put HHH on the floor, thereby spending about half of Maven’s offense. Back in and Maven grabs the headlock so HHH drives him into the corner without much effort. Maven goes up, only to have Batista knock him off the ropes.

That’s an ejection so Flair shoves the referee and gets ejected as well. The jumping knee to the face kills Maven’s run and the spinebuster gets two, with Benoit and Jericho pulling the referee out. HHH glares at the Canadians, allowing Benoit to send him into the steps. The biased referee won’t eject Benoit and it’s a flying shoulder to take HHH down. A middle rope Blockbuster bulldog gets two so Benoit offers a distraction, allowing Jericho to hit a Lionsault.

That means a very delayed two and HHH has had it, setting up the Pedigree. Jericho puts Maven’s foot on the rope, which is FINALLY enough for an ejection. Benoit uses that distraction for a German suplex into the Swan Dive for another delayed two. Cue Edge to spear the referee by mistake so Jericho and Benoit beat down their fellow Canadian. It’s Batista and Flair coming in to clean house with Flair handing HHH the belt, but Orton runs in to knock HHH silly. Flair pulls the referee out at two though, drawing in Snitsky to beat up Orton. Snitsky kicks Maven in the face and another Pedigree retains the title.

Rating: D+. They did the only thing they could to make HHH vs. Maven watchable: they didn’t let us watch HHH vs. Maven. This was one puff of smoke and a mirror after another and that’s the exact way to go if the match has to take place. Now the good thing is that they didn’t try to make this anything serious. All night long they acted as if Maven was going to get his head handed to him and that’s what makes sense. They would have been nuts to try to make Maven a threat on his own and they didn’t try to, thank goodness.

Overall Rating: C-. Aside from helping Benoit and Jericho, I can’t picture Maven doing anything else in the main event scene and that’s the only call. He isn’t ready for this level and that’s become clear, so just let him go back to the lower midcard where he belongs. The Tag Team Title switch was cool, as was the tag match in the middle, but the rest of the show was just waiting to get Maven’s stuff done. Not bad, but just kind of a thing they did.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – November 8, 2004: “Survivor Series Doesn’t Matter” – WWE, In Not So Many Words

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 8, 2004
Location: Frank Erwin Center, Austin, Texas
Attendance: 4,300
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the go home show for Survivor Series and that means we’ll probably be seeing a bunch of singles matches between the people involved in the Win Eric Bischoff’s Job Match on Sunday. HHH still doesn’t have anyone chasing the title and that’s probably by design. HHH’s design that is. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with HHH in mid-promo in the ring, ranting about how he stayed home last week in an effort to teach people a lesson. All he found out was that there are a bunch of thickheaded people around here because they took the chance to attack Evolution. That attack put Ric Flair on the shelf and angered Batista. You won’t like him when he’s angry. That all happened under Bischoff’s watch, with Bischoff cutting him off and coming to the ring.

Bischoff explains the Survivor Series stipulation again but HHH grabs him by the jacket. That’s not a good idea as if HHH doesn’t let go, he might be losing the title. With his jacket now released, Bischoff explains things again so HHH gets in his face, saying a loss would mean a bunch of title defenses. Bischoff thinks it won’t be a problem so let’s have a match.

Batista vs. Randy Orton

Joined in progress after a break with Batista charging into an elbow but blocking the RKO. That’s enough to send Batista outside so he comes back in with the forearms and kicks in the corner. This time Orton takes him outside and sends Batista into the barricade, followed by his own right hands back inside. A thumb to the eye (shoutout to Naitch) lets Orton shoulder Batista to the floor but he’s right back in with a shoulder of his own.

The chinlock has Orton in trouble as Lawler freaks out over the possible handicaps at Survivor Series. Orton finally fights up and runs Batista over but HHH grabs the foot to block the RKO. That means the big clothesline from Batista but the referee ejects HHH. We take a break and come back with Batista getting two each off a neckbreaker and a suplex.

The chinlock goes on again as Batista doesn’t seem to quite know how to work a match this long yet (fair enough as he mainly does short matches or tags). This one doesn’t last as long though as Orton fights up but gets sent shoulder first into the post with a fall onto the steps making it even worse.

Now it’s a chinlock with a bodyscissors (now that’s better because it’s a somewhat different hold) until Batista fights up and hits a dropkick. A Cactus Clothesline puts them both on the floor and a DDT on the floor gets two back inside. The annoyed Orton stomps away and Batista is busted open. The RKO is countered into a spinebuster but Batista misses a charge into the corner, letting Orton get the rollup pin.

Rating: B-. Not bad here and they gave it a lot of time (about twenty minutes with commercials) with Orton winning clean. Batista got in a lot though and a loss to a bigger star like this, especially when he blocked the RKO over and over, isn’t going to hurt him. Orton needed a win to get him back on track too, though I’m not sure where that track can lead at the moment.

Post break Orton gives his team a pep talk but an enraged Batista runs in to go after all four of them. The whole team can barely stop him but Arn Anderson comes in and drives Batista away single handedly because he enforces order these days.

We recap Edge vs. Chris Benoit, with Edge snapping over having to team with him instead of getting the World Title shot. They lost the Tag Team Titles and Edge put a bloodied Benoit in the Crossface in a good segment.

Benoit promises to take care of Edge tonight with violence instead of catchphrases. Why yes, this is completely missing from the Network.

Tyson Tomko vs. Shelton Benjamin

Non-title and Christian is in Tomko’s corner. Tomko jumps him from behind to start but Shelton is right back with a knee to the face for two. A gorilla press into a fall away slam takes Shelton right back down and it’s time for a trip to the floor for a cheap shot from Christian. Back in and Shelton grabs a Russian legsweep but the Dragon Whip is countered into something like a chokeslam for two. The missed Stinger Splash makes it even worse but Shelton slips out of a powerslam, superkicks Christian, and hits the exploder to put Tomko away.

Rating: C. It didn’t have much time but it was similar to the first match: a talented guy against a monster (albeit a much less talented monster) with Shelton having to overcome the odds. Tomko looked downright competent here and it was probably the best match he’s had to date. Take it with the bag of salt required but it’s better than nothing.

Smackdown Rebound.

It’s time for the Highlight Reel with Trish Stratus and Lita as guests. Since Jericho seems a little intimidated by them, he has a referee here to keep them apart. With the referee holding them back, Trish calls Lita the Walking Kiss of Death and says that since Lita is here now, this show is getting canceled like Dark Angel. Jericho doesn’t like the sound of that but he’ll cancel his solution to Better Sl**s and Gardens because Trish brought the real thing right here. Trish brushes that off and says Lita has been out of action for too long (action in the ring that is).

While she’s been getting fat, Trish has been making history. Lita snaps and talks about wanting to get her hands on Trish for seven months. If she’s the Kiss of Death, Trish can pucker up on Sunday. This brings out Snitsky and he’s he’s got a baby in his arms. The baby is crying and Snitsky offers him to Lita, but pulls it back because he’s going to do whatever he wants to it….like PUNTING IT INTO THE CROWD. Avowed non-baby punter Jericho knocks Snitsky outside but gets kicked in the face for his efforts. A posting leaves Jericho down and Lita is terrified.

Here’s Simon Dean for a new life commercial. Just like last week, he’s bringing in a fan to try the system in person. The fan is picked, but Simon knows she’s not in great health because she’s so fat that she can’t take a shower. She’s so appalled that he picks someone else on the other side of the ring. This one isn’t happy with having Simon suggest that he needs help cleaning himself so we’ll move on to someone else.

The third fan finally agrees to get in the ring for a test of the Simon System. As Lawler makes jokes about her size, she introduces herself with Simon saying that everything must be bigger in Texas. Simon asks how long it’s been since she’s had sexual relations and knows that her friends just hang out with her because it makes them feel better.

She actually agrees to try the System and takes one of his drinks, which seems to taste pretty good. It helps you lose weight, and for someone her size, it should only take about twenty gallons a day. That means the drink goes onto Simon, who pours the rest onto her to end a long and not very funny segment. They’re trying to push someone but…..yeah I don’t see this one working.

HHH vs. Tajiri

Non-title. Hang on as here’s Snitsky to jump Tajiri in the aisle and kick him in the face. HHH is pleased and offers a handshake, but Snitsky says if they win, he’s coming for the title. You can hear the gulp from here.

Muhammad Hassan and Daivari are in a normal suburb with Hassan talking about growing up in a place like this. He was just like any other American and treated the same….until 9/11. All he wants is a chance. Daivari speaks Arabic

Pay per view rundown with Michael Cole and Tazz joining in for the Smackdown side.

Lawler starts up an OU SUCKS chant to annoy JR.

Edge talks about making his debut in this arena and how he wants to get his old feeling back by hurting Benoit. HHH comes in and downs some water to recover from his match. He’s looking forward to having Edge next to him instead of across from him on Sunday. HHH is worried about Snitsky but Edge says they’ll win because of him….and then he’ll come after the title himself. HHH having reality set in on him is always worth a look.

Here’s Edge vs. Benoit in Smackdown vs. Raw 2004. I played the heck out of that.

HHH rants to Batista about Edge and Snitsky, who Batista needs to set straight. He leaves the title behind and Batista takes a nice look at it.

Christy Hemme does the ring announcing for the main event. We spent how many months to get a new ring announcer?

Chris Benoit vs. Edge

Benoit isn’t wasting time and starts fast, knocking Edge outside and then throwing him back inside for a failed Crossface attempt. A belly to back suplex is more of a success as the announcers talk about all the people wanting a shot at HHH. Edge pulls him to the floor to get something going for the first time but a clothesline takes care of that in a hurry. That’s enough for Edge who tries to walk out, though he’s just suckering Benoit in for a smart move. Benoit goes back first into the apron and we take a break.

Back with Edge holding a chinlock and adding some right hands to the face for a bonus. With Benoit in trouble, here are Batista and HHH for a closer look. Now it’s Maven, Jericho and Orton to stare at the two of them because they’re bullies who need a numbers advantage. We actually focus on the match for a bit with Benoit walking into a spinebuster for more right hands to the head.

Edge takes too long going up and gets headbutted into a top rope superplex for a rather nice crash. Benoit gets the better of a slugout and knocks Edge off the apron, giving us another staredown from everyone outside. Not being one to wait, Benoit goes after Edge and catapults him into the steps. The Sharpshooter goes on until Edge makes the ropes so Benoit rolls the German suplexes. Edge is busted open as Benoit’s Swan Dive gets two, meaning the Crossface goes on. Everyone comes in and it’s a no contest.

Rating: B-. These two have always had good chemistry together and that was on display here, even with all the distractions going on around them. The ending didn’t help things but it does make sense with the main story. These two had a reason to be fighting other than just being on different teams on Sunday. That’s so much better than “here’s a preview for Sunday” with nothing else between the two of them.

Post match Snitsky cleans house and Team HHH gets in the ring for a staredown. The other four come back in and take care of the villains to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. The wrestling was good, but outside of the opener and main event, there wasn’t much of it to be seen. The problem at the moment is that the entire show is built around one match on Sunday, which is setting up the next month’s worth of shows. There’s something to everyone coming for HHH’s title, but this show made it clear that I need to watch the upcoming Raw’s instead of Survivor Series. That’s a rather backwards way of doing things and while this show was certainly watchable, I don’t really care to see the Raw half of the pay per view.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – November 1, 2004 (2019 Redo): Wrestling For Your Corporate Future

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 1, 2004
Location: Peoria Civic Center, Peoria, Illinois
Attendance: 6,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

The big story this week is the locker room rising up against Evolution, who ran roughshod last week because Eric Bischoff was gone and they just decided they were in charge. Randy Orton isn’t allowed to challenge HHH for the World Title anymore, making me wonder who in the world is supposed to go after the belt. Odds are no one at the moment, meaning more HHH bragging time. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a look back at the locker room fighting back against Evolution last week, with a focus on Orton not getting to challenge HHH again because he lost to Ric Flair. No worries though as he hit HHH with an RKO to end the show.

Opening sequence.

Eugene vs. Gene Snitsky

Hardcore match with Snitsky wheeling out a baby carriage. In the back, William Regal explains a hardcore match to Eugene, who says he has to do this himself and stand on his own two feet. I don’t see this going well. The fans are behind Eugene as he slugs away with a broom handle to as much success as you would expect.

Snitsky is fine enough to hit him with a chain and pulls out a NO BABIES sign to blast Eugene again. A slam onto a sign keeps Eugene in trouble but he gets in a shot with the chair for a breather. Some leather strap shots to the back put Snitsky down as the fans are WAY into this. Snitsky shrugs it off though and it’s pumphandle slam onto a street sign for the pin.

Rating: D+. They’re keeping Snitsky short here and that’s the right idea. Let him be a monster and beat up the popular guys without overexposing him, which has worked for years and it’s working here. Eventually someone can slay the monster, but the longer they build him up, the better this is going to be.

Post match Snitsky loads up the chair around Eugene’s neck but Regal runs in with the brass knuckles for the save. The father figure role is working well for Regal, because you know he can back it up if he has to.

HHH says everyone attacked him last week because they’re jealous of him. They attacked the biggest star in WWE today and the guy bringing the people into those arenas (3,500 out of 18,000 in Milwaukee for Taboo Tuesday anyone?). He won’t be there tonight so let’s see how things go without the franchise player. There better be a hero’s welcome for him when he gets back next week.

New interviewer Maria Kanellis talks to Tajiri, who is glad HHH is gone because the locker room is sick of him. Batista and Ric Flair come in for the beatdown.

Here are Batista and Flair in the arena with Flair saying what happened to HHH last week was unacceptable. Like him or not, the fans all need to respect HHH because he is the World Champion. If you don’t treat him with respect, Batista has no problem with destroying the entire locker room.

This brings out Bischoff, who doesn’t want to hear anymore. He gets right to the point, annoying three matches for Survivor Series: Christian vs. Shelton Benjamin for the Intercontinental Title, Trish Stratus defending the Women’s Title against Lita and Team HHH (HHH, Batista, Edge, Gene Snitsky) vs. Team Randy Orton (Randy Orton, Chris Jericho, Chris Benoit, Maven). Flair doesn’t like his name being left off that team but Bischoff says it’s because of what happened last week. He wants to see the inmates run the asylum even more because he’s tired of having Flair try to boss people around.

Evolution didn’t come to his rescue at Taboo Tuesday so what has he gained by sucking up to them for two and a half years (as usual, Bischoff isn’t great on details). Therefore, he has an idea: he’s going on vacation for a month after Survivor Series and the winning team is going to get Raw for that time, with each member getting to be in charge for a week. Batista doesn’t find that to be fair because Benoit and Jericho would just give themselves title matches. That sounds like a threat so Bischoff says they better win at Survivor Series. So there’s your next six weeks and while it could be worse, I don’t buy Bischoff’s new style lasting.

Christian vs. Hurricane

Christian grabs a headlock takeover but here’s Edge less than ten seconds in. He’s back on Raw and has his book, which apparently includes a lot of material on Christian. The book is available tomorrow and you can read about his likes and dislikes, such as Peoria. The only problem is he wanted the last chapter to focus on his winning the vote at Taboo Tuesday and won the World Title. Don’t worry: he can have an epilogue in the paperback.

Edge goes to leave but sees the angry JR, who must want an autographed copy. We get to the match for once with Hurricane hitting a running neckbreaker for two. Hurricane gets the same off a high crossbody but gets sent into the post, setting up the Unprettier to give Christian the pin. More than half of the match was on Edge, which is a really questionable decision during a match featuring the #1 contender to the Intercontinental Title.

Post match Shelton Benjamin runs in to chase Christian off. Christian yells at Shelton for costing him the vote at Taboo Tuesday. He knows Shelton wants to fight but since Tomko is hurt, here’s a one night only problem solver: Viscera, giving Shelton a great “are you serious?” look. The double beatdown is on with Shelton taking a World’s Strongest Slam. Note that this is the same day that Test and A-Train were released. They see Viscera with more upside than A-Train?

Edge is happy to be back because he’s ready to defend the Tag Team Titles tonight. Since Benoit beat La Resistance on his own, tonight should be an easy title defense. Benoit comes up and Edge takes a title (with Sylvan Grenier’s nameplate still front and center), saying Benoit better watch his attitude or it’ll be another solo defense tonight.

Maven goes in to see Evolution because he didn’t like what happened to Tajiri earlier. Flair gets rather serious but Orton and Jericho come in as well and Evolution backs down.

Here’s Simon Dean live in person to give away a year’s supply of products. After insulting a woman, he calls in a fan with limited teeth….and that is the future Beer City Bruiser of Ring of Honor fame. I had no idea he had been around that long. Anyway Dean makes fun of his weight and the fan loses it, earning himself a beatdown.

Lawler has a thing called a Juicebox, a portable device that lets you watch video clips, look at photos and listen to MP3s. Oh those wacky 2004 flashes in the pans.

Tag Team Titles: La Resistance vs. Chris Benoit/Edge

Edge and Benoit are defending but there’s no Edge to start so Benoit has to go it alone again, though he’s fine enough to hit a backbreaker on Grenier. Conway gets in a neckbreaker to take over though and Benoit is in trouble. Cue Edge, with a full entrance, to distract Benoit even more and the beating continues. Benoit finally gets in a suplex for a breather but Edge walks out as we take a break.

Back with Edge on commentary and showing him the new book. Grenier cranks on a cravate as JR snaps as only he can at this level of disrespect. The comeback is on as we discuss Edge’s high school yearbook and neck surgery. Benoit snaps off a bunch of suplexes, including a few German versions to Conway. The Swan Dive connects and the Crossface goes on as Edge gets in to distract the referee, leaving Benoit to take Au Revoir to give La Resistance the titles back.

Rating: D. The wrestling wasn’t the point here of course, though Edge was hilarious on commentary as he’s kind of perfect for this role. It also makes sense to have him not care about the Tag Team Titles because, as he mentioned at Taboo Tuesday, he’s held them ten times before and it’s time for him to step up to the next level. We really, really need some new champions though as it feels like La Resistance has held the titles for years.

Post match Edge hits him with the belt (blood) and a spear, plus a Crossface to make Benoit tap. That was better than anything in the match.

Evolution comes in to Bischoff’s office and yells about the Survivor Series stipulation. He demands that Bischoff change things but that’s a no (you don’t have to ask Bischoff twice to screw Flair over). Bischoff doesn’t get why people want him to have so much power but he’ll use some of it tonight. We’re going to have a six man tag: Evolution vs. Jericho/Maven/Orton. HHH isn’t here but if he doesn’t show up, it can just be a handicap match.

Here’s the debuting Muhammad Hassan, who says he’s an Arab American and born right here in the United States. Since 9/11, he’s been stereotyped as a terrorist who blows things up. Now, please be respectful to him. He praises Allah and Khosrow Daivari, his manager, translates to Arabic. Right now, someone needs to pop up with a sign telling them to GO BACK! YOU’RE NOT SMART ENOUGH TO DO THIS!

Survivor Series rundown.

We look back at Viscera and Christian attacking Shelton Benjamin.

Shelton Benjamin vs. Viscera

Non-title and Benjamin has taped up ribs. Viscera goes straight for the ribs and takes the tape off, setting up the big fat splashes in the corner. The belly to belly suplex crushes the ribs again and a big elbow makes it even worse. Viscera tries a charge (work with me here) into the corner but gets drop toeholded into the middle buckle instead. For some reason Shelton tries the exploder and gets crushed for another near fall. With Christian cheering Viscera on from the stage, Shelton grabs a handful of face and hits the Dragon Whip for the fast pin.

Rating: F. They went with this over A-Train??? I know A-Train isn’t great but he’s a heck of a lot more mobile and versatile than Viscera, whose entire offense revolves around being 500lbs. The match was nothing with Benjamin hitting the finisher and Viscera looking like a turtle on his back.

Post match Christian comes in for the stomping and takes the exploder.

Smackdown Rebound.

Here’s Trish Stratus for a chat. She’s here to calm down her friends and family who have been panicking since they found out she’s facing Lita at Survivor Series. We see a video of Lita’s managing over the years, including her time with Essa Rios (Me when I was about twelve: “Rios is awesome. If he can get rid of that annoying redhead, he’ll be a lot better.”) who disappeared, the Hardys….who are gone as well (Trish, narrating: “TL-C you later.”) and the time with Kane where he got his throat crushed (Trish: “Ding dong the freak is dead!”) because Lita is the kiss of death.

Back in the arena, Trish talks about Lita being more than a walking kiss of death. She’s a loser too and at Survivor Series, she’ll lose the match just like she lost her baby. Cue Lita and Trish knows she’s screwed up. The beating is on in a hurry with Lita bouncing Trish’s head off the mat. Gail Kim comes in for the save and the beatdown is on, capped off by a Chick Kick to leave Lita laying. Trish is on fire at the moment and I want to see Lita take her head off so well done all around.

More voter registration stuff.

Maven/Randy Orton/Chris Jericho vs. Evolution

There’s no HHH but Maven is on the other team so is it really a handicap? Orton and Batista start things off with Batista charging into a boot in the corner and getting rolled up for two. Flair comes in and gets punched down as well, setting up the backdrop so Flair can get in the trademark screaming. It’s off to Jericho for the Walls, which he releases so we can have a three on one staredown of Batista before he can interfere.

We settle back down to Maven hitting a missile dropkick on Flair and it’s time to stare at Batista again. Jericho comes in to beat up Flair some more and even draws Batista in to distract the referee, meaning it’s a low blow to Ric. Batista finally gets smart by coming in and decking Jericho so he can drag Flair to the corner for the tag. The spinebuster gets two on Jericho and Flair is fine enough to start the chopping.

The running enziguri drops Flair to get Jericho out of trouble so it’s back to Orton vs. Batista. Yet another backdrop has Flair in trouble and there’s the powerslam to Batista for two. A double dropkick sends Batista outside so it’s time for Evolution to leave. HHH’s music hits though….and it’s Tajiri, spitting mist instead of water (which the camera misses). Batista gets thrown back inside and with Flair dropkicked to the floor, the parade of finishers begins. The RKO is enough to put Batista away for good.

Rating: D+. Well that certainly happened. It’s fairly clear that Batista and Flair aren’t as good as two former World Champions plus Maven with an assist from Tajiri. In case you were ever wondering about that, you now have your answer. Other than that, the only thing this match made me do is wonder why we never had a HHH vs. Jericho title match around this time. They had a lumberjack match a few weeks ago that barely lasted five minutes and was more about other things than their match. A one off title match, even on a low level pay per view, wouldn’t have been out of the question.

The good guys pose on the stage and Batista shoves Flair down to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This was a weird one, but it’s a weird time in the company. It’s like they’re trying to change things up a little bit and see what else they can do, which is certainly a welcome move after all the weeks and months of repetitive material. There are new characters and stories, but they’re not particularly good character or stories so far.

Maven being there because of the Tough Enough show being on is I guess supposed to serve as proof that the winners go somewhere, but that’s not exactly helping the fans. I’ll take the new stuff over more of the old though, so we’ll call this an improvement without much of a shelf life.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

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