Joey Janela’s Spring Break 8: Can We Go Back To School?

Joey Janela’s Spring Break 8
Date: April 5, 2024
Location: Penns Landing Caterers, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Dave Prazak, Veda Scott

This is one of the bigger independent shows of Wrestlemania Weekend and the biggest GCW show as well. The main event if Joey Janela himself challenging the rather unpopular Black Christian for the GCW World Title. As usual this show could be all over the place and that makes it more fun. Let’s get to it.

I only follow GCW to a certain extent so I apologize in advance for missing details about characters or storylines. I’m basically going based off what commentary or the wrestlers tell me.

Note that I was in the arena for this show, sitting in the sixth row with the entrance on my right.

In Memory of Virgil.

Opening video.

Rina Yamashita/Masha Slamovich vs. Minoru Suzuki/Masato Tanaka

Rina and Tanaka start things off with the former’s running shoulders not getting her very far. Suzuki and Slamovich come in but I can’t stop looking at a rather stupid looking fan. Looks like some overrated wrestling reviewer. Slamovich can’t get very far so it’s back to Tanaka to take her down by the arm. The fight heads out to the floor and we go split screen, which is more than most major promotions can remember to do.

Back in and Suzuki stomps away at Slamovich in the corner before Tanaka just slaps her in the face. It’s back to Suzuki who alternates between cranking on various limbs to keep Slamovich down. Slamovich manages a quick suplex and it’s back to Rina to pick things up. We get the “let’s stand here and exchange forearms”, with Suzuki getting the better of things.

Tanaka comes in for a top rope superplex, which he rolls into another suplex. Rina gets away for the tag back to Slamovich, who strikes both guys down. A double powerbomb gets two on Tanaka and let’s get a door. Splash Mountain through the door is broken up by Suzuki, who is sent outside. Tanaka puts Slamovich (mostly) through the table for two but Slamovich is right back with a crucifix for the pin at 13:48.

Rating: C+. This was a nice start as the fans are always going to react to Suzuki and Tanaka was a big enough deal in ECW for the local fans. Other than that, it didn’t get too violent and that left us with a mostly clean tag match. It’s nice to see something like that on a show that has a tendency to get nuts, though I’m sure that’s coming later.

Rock N Roll Express/Kerry Morton vs. East West Express/Mike Bailey

The Rock N Roll (Ricky Morton and Robert Gibson) are legends (as opposed to the East/West of Jordan Oliver and Nick Wayne) and of course good guys but Kerry (Ricky’s son) is a loudmouthed heel. Before the match, Kerry tells the fans to shut the f*** up and asks who all of these people think they are to get in the ring with the. And then the fans BOO HIM??? Kerry jumps the three of them from behind to no avail and it’s a neckbreaker into Bailey’s shooting star press for two.

Wayne and Oliver start working on the arm before it’s off to Ricky, who gets elbowed in the face. Ricky tells Wayne to run the ropes but Kerry gets in a cheap shot, which doesn’t work for Kerry. The fans sing their disdain for Kerry, who doesn’t take kindly to it but does take Wayne down with a slingshot suplex. Wayne manages a running uppercut for a breather and it’s Bailey coming back in to pick up the pace.

Oliver snaps off a double chop and…bounces up and down a lot. The East/West comes in for their double cutter out of the corner but Kerry shoves the referee into the ropes for the break, earning him a big yelling from Ricky. He even slaps Kerry and I guess that’s enough for Ricky to be Legal. A Canadian Destroyer hits Wayne and he dives onto a bunch of people, including Kerry. The Mortons hit stereo dropkicks for two on Wayne as Bailey makes the save. Oliver and Wayne are back in though and it’s the double cutter for the pin on Ricky at 9:21.

Rating: C+. This was more about Ricky vs. Kerry than anything else while also having the Rock N Roll in there. It made for a good enough story, but the action was only so good. You can only get so much out of the Rock N Roll these days and while that’s fair enough, it was smart to keep this relatively short. And of course with Bailey in there, because he comes complete with every Wrestlemania Weekend show.

Dragon Gate Classic vs. Reiwa New Generation

That would be Dragon Kid/Kzy/Yamato vs. Ben-K/Kota Minoura/Shun Skywalker. Yamato and Ben start things off and they go to the mat for the grappling exchange. With that not working, Kzy and Minoura come in and the latter doesn’t think much of what appears to be dancing. That doesn’t work either, so it’s off to the masked Skywalker and the, uh, also masked Kid.

A Stundog Millionaire drops Skywalker so Ben and Minoura come in for an assisted kick to Kid’s face. Ben does his rotating gutwrench suplex to drop Kid again, followed by Skywalker’s suplex to keep Kid in trouble. Minoura comes back in with a Boston crab, sending Kid straight to the ropes.

Kid finally manages to get in a shot of his own and it’s back to Yamato to pick up the pace. Kzy hits a big dive to the floor, leaving Yamato to suplex Ben for two. Minoura gets super hurricanranaed down and Kzy’s frog splash gets two more. Back up and Skywalker monkey flips Kzy into Kid and Yamato but Kzy forearms the heck out of Skywalker. Minoura is back in and gets caught in a crucifix to give Kid the pin at 13:53.

Rating: B. They were doing the showcase route here and that went rather well. It’s a case where you take a bunch of talented people and let them go out there for a bunch of fun spots for a good while. It worked well here with everyone going nuts until someone got the pin. Rather entertaining stuff here and it went exactly as it should have.

Cole Radrick vs. Aigle Blanc vs. Alec Price vs. Arez vs. Leon Slater vs. Marcus Mathers vs. Mr. Danger vs. Myron Reed

Grab The Brass Ring ladder match, with a Sonic looking ring above the ring, meaning the winner gets a shot at any title on demand. It’s a big brawl to start and everyone heads outside and thankfully we go split screen again. Radrick and Blanc grab chairs and go back inside for a duel, with Radrick knocking him right back to the floor. Mathers comes back in to kick the chair into Radrick’s head before it’s Danger coming in for a springboard legdrop to knock a ladder onto Reed’s face.

Now it’s Arez and Mathers picking up a ladder to clear a few people out, only to have Blanc break it up. We get the required ladder around the head (Price’s in this case) so he can spin around rather quickly to knock a bunch of people down. Price is down as well so it’s Microman, who stands 3’3, in with a tiny ladder of his own. He does his own ladder spin, resulting in a bunch of low blows for even more knockdowns. Microman sends Mathers into a ladder in the corner and there’s a headscissors to Price.

Back up and Price nails a clothesline before going up. Arez breaks that up with a springboard cutter so Radrick grabs the ladder, only to have that broken up as well. Mathers shoves a ladder over to send Danger into another ladder. Blanc misses a Swanton onto the ladder, allowing Slater to hit a Swanton 450 (that looks cool) to crush Blanc again. Mathers powerbombs Blanc onto a bunch of people on the floor but Reed pulls him off the ladder.

A F5 onto the top into a Downward Spiral plants Mathers but Price sends Reed face first into the ladder. There’s the big dive to the pile on the floor, leaving Slater to hit the huge dive over the post. A bunch of people check on Slater until Reed dives over the top for a cutter onto the pile. Danger goes up for the huge moonsault onto a bunch of people, leaving the fans pleased and everyone else down. Back in and Danger goes up but Radrick slows him down. Mathers and Price go up as well before going crashing down, leaving Radrick to knock Danger off and win at 17:06.

Rating: B-. This was the big cluster (ok maybe not the best word on a Joey Janela show) ladder match and it worked rather well. It’s the best way to have this many people on the roster at once as the fans get to see a bunch of stars in one match. It helps that there were stakes with this being similar to the Money In The Bank ladder match. There were a lot of people out there, but at least they kept things moving well enough.

Matt Cardona vs. Blue Pain

Cardona, with Steph de Lander and Jimmy Lloyd, is dressed as Macho King (with Queen Steph) and lets us know how lucky we are to have him. He was on TNA AND AEW recently and this weekend, his best friend Cody Rhodes will finish his story. Pain on the other hand is better known as Blue Kane and he’s kind of the Xanta Claus version of Kane: he wears blue, he controls cold instead of fire, he comes out to Eiffel 65’s Blue song, and he weighs two Cease And Desist Orders.

Cardona strikes away to start and gets scared out to the floor, as the flashbacks to the old US Title days are still real (that’s a weirdly clever idea). Back in and Pain uppercuts Cardona right back to the floor, meaning it’s time to stalk Cardona into the crowd. They fight into the balcony (not that high) and Pain loads up a table, only to get hit in the eyes with…something. Lloyd has to make the save but gets put in a chair and sent through the table (call back to Kane vs. Cardona back in WWE).

They get back in, where a de Lander distraction lets Cardona knock Pain off the top, setting up stereo Broski Boots. An Urn is brought in but Cardona hits de Lander by mistake (she urned that one), allowing Pain to hit the top rope clothesline. A chokeslam gets two, with de Lander pulling the referee out.

Radio Silence connects and another referee, dressed like Zack Ryder and coming out to the Zack Ryder theme, comes in to count two but flips Cardona off and kicks him low. Pain fights up with a chokeslam attempt, only to have Ryder hit him low, as Cardona reveals (and drops to the floor) a cup. That doesn’t work either so chokeslams abound until Lloyd is back. A fireball to the face (oddly appropriate) blinds Pain and Radio Silence lets all four villains pile on for the pin at 9:04.

Rating: B-. We can call this the definition of “stupid, goofy fun” and that is not a bad thing. Cardona is a big deal around here and it’s nice to see him getting to do something as silly as beating up a blue version of a monster who messed with him about ten years ago. Sometimes you need to do something ridiculous to give the fans a good time and that is exactly what happened here.

Gringo Loco vs. Amazing Red

This should be fun. Feeling out process to start with neither being able to get anywhere, including Red offering a clean break. They run the ropes and exchange some near falls until Red pauses on a big kick to the head. Loco isn’t having a handshake and knocks him outside, only to have Red snap off a hurricanrana.

The dive drops Loco again and Red sends him into the chairs before going back inside for the chops. Loco fights up and knocks him to the floor this time, only to let Red get back in due to that pesky respect stuff. Back in and a tornado DDT gives Red two more as they’re going back and forth here. Loco’s sitout powerbomb gives him two of his own but a top rope superplex is broken up.

Instead Red sends him down for a top rope faceplant but Loco hits a standing version for two more. Another powerbomb is countered into a hurricanrana to give Red two so they both go up. This time it’s a super Spanish Fly to give Loco another near fall and they’re both a bit winded. Loco loads up…something but gets kicked in the back, allowing Red to take him up top for a super poisonrana. A top rope double stomp into a frog splash into Code Red is enough to give Red the pin at 15:55.

Rating: B. This was a way more straightforward match and it went rather well. After having all of the goofiness before and the violence that is still scheduled, it is nice to have something like this. Red is way past his prime but can still do some rather nice things. Loco is still more than good enough as well and they had a rather solid match here, at least given the circumstances.

Respect is shown post match.

We recap Mance Warner vs. Effy in an I Quit match. The commentary before the video said they’re former stablemates and now hate each other, but we’re not told why or what happened. Warner is rather violent though and apparently stabbed Effy with a drill to the head. As you do.

Effy vs. Mance Warner

I Quit and the fans do not like Warner whatsoever. We even get the Big Match Intros to really make this feel special. Warner hammers away to start and strikes away, only to charge into a German suplex. Effy hits a running boot in the corner and flips into something like a dragon sleeper. That’s broken up so Effy hits a spear to take Warner down again.

It’s time to bring in some chairs, one of which is thrown over the top and onto Warner’s head. Effy chairs him down and loads up a door, but does stop to chair Warner down again in a smart move. Warner is fine enough to spinebuster him through an open chair and a spinning DDT through the table connects. It’s way too early for Effy to quit so Warner chairs him down again.

Back up and Effy sends him through another door for another no, setting up a piledriver onto the chairs. Effy tries a Rough Ryder but is quickly powerbombed down onto the chairs as well. That’s nowhere near enough so let’s steal the referee’s belt to whip Effy over the back. Effy shrugs that off and grabs the belt, which he wraps around his fist to punch Warner in the face.

Some whipping in the corner makes Warner say no again and it’s time to bridge a door between some chairs. Choking takes too long though and Effy gets sent through the door, which is good for another no. They slug it out on the apron, with Effy snapping off a standing Blockbuster. Another door is loaded up at ringside but Warner grabs a chokeslam to send him through it as the violence continues.

Back in and they trade pieces of door shots to the head. Effy gets the better of things again and they trade low blows to put them both down again. Warner whips out a screwdriver to hit Effy in the head and it’s time to bring out some zip ties. The bloody Effy is tied to the top rope and Warner throws a chair at his head. That’s still a no so here is Allie Katch (Effy’s partner) with the drill…but Warner chairs her down and loads up the drill. Effy quits to save Katch at 21:47.

Rating: B-. This was the match that caught my eye more than anything else on the card and it told a story (unlike the story that we weren’t given about how we got here) but it never really got to that next level. Instead it was just a bunch of hitting people with stuff until they did the ending. It wasn’t bad, but I was expecting more in what felt like it could have been one of the best things on the show.

We recap Nick Gage/Maki Itoh vs. Danhausen/Ram Kaicho. Gage was unhappy with Danhausen for costing him a win so it’s time to bring in a partner each.

Nick Gage/Maki Itoh vs. Danhausen/Ram Kaicho

Kaicho appears to be a bit dead and Gage and Itoh have Discount Dewey Donovan with them (he still has a website, where he brags about how little effort he has put into it and has not updated it in about 18 years). The fans REALLY do not like Danhausen during the Big Match Intros and even he seems a bit surprised.

Danhausen and Gage start things off but Danhausen wants Itoh instead. The curse is blocked with a middle finger so Danhausen grabs a headlock. Itoh gets knocked down and Danhausen drops a falling headbutt, a signature Itoh spot. Back up and Itoh knocks him down so it’s off to Kaicho, who uses her….death dust to blind Itoh? With that shrugged off, Itoh hammers away in the corner and hits a running boot for two. Gage comes in and knocks a crossbodying Itoh down and an elbow makes it worse.

Itoh DDTs her way to freedom and hands it off to Danhausen to slug away at Gage, followed by the flying shoulder. Everything breaks down and Gage pulls Danhausen outside, where it’s time to grab a door. All four get inside and it’s a four way knockdown, with Gage grabbing the pizza cutter.

Kaicho blasts him with the dust though and hits a dropkick to put Gage through the door in the corner. Danhausen pizza cutters Itoh and pours the teeth in her mouth, setting up the running booth. Back up and Gage sends Danhausen through another door as Itoh drops Kaicho. Stereo falling headbutts give Gage and Itoh the stereo pins at 13:01.

Rating: C+. What were you expecting here? It was basically a way to have Gage vs. Danhausen and it wasn’t exactly good. Gage is as big of a star as he can be around here and more or less it gave him a way to get on the card. Danhausen has fallen really hard in recent months and while he’s not done yet, it would be nice to see him getting to do something else to freshen things up a bit.

Post match Gage thanks the fans so the winners can leave.

We recap Blake Christian defending the GCW World Title against Joey Janela. No one likes Christian so it’s time for Janela to save the title from a horrible champion. He’s also standing up to Christian for going after Missy Hyatt, because that is a thing that is happening in 2024.

GCW World Title: Blake Christian vs. Joey Janela

Christian, with Shane Mercer, is defending and Missy Hyatt (with Gucci purse) is here with Janela. We get the Big Match Intros and Janela is in the Lex Luger Summerslam 1993 gear, which can’t go badly whatsoever. The mic goes out during Christian’s entrance because even the electronics don’t like Christian.

They fight over a lockup to start and that goes a grand total of nowhere. Janela shoulders him out to the floor but Christian is back in to slug away. A backdrop does a bit better for Janela and it’s time for a door. That takes too long so it’s Christian hitting a dive to send the door into Janela for a change. We hit the hair pull, followed by a chinlock, which isn’t a good sign less than ten minutes into the match.

Janela fights up but gets sent outside, where Mercer puts him into the post. Christian sends him face first through a chair and even busts out a cartwheel inside. Back up and Janela manages a quick cutter into a brainbuster for two, meaning frustration is starting to set in. That takes too long so Christian is back up with a springboard elbow for two of his own.

Stereo clotheslines give us a double knockdown, followed by a DDT to plant Christian onto the apron. The door is set up at ringside but Christian slips out of a Death Valley Driver. Back in and Janela snaps off a German suplex, followed by the Death Valley Driver for two. Janela takes too much time going up and gets knocked down, allowing Christian to hit a springboard 450 for two of his own.

Christian sends him outside for the big flip dive into a Nightmare On Helm Street on the floor. A moonsault press is countered back inside and Janela hits a quick jackknife. Janela grabs a chair to knock Christian down and then wraps the chair around his head. Mercer offers a quick distraction though and it’s Christian coming back with a spinebuster through the chair.

A Stomp gives Christian two and the shock sets in quickly. Mercer throws in a mostly broken door and some chairs but Hyatt comes in, meaning Janela has to make the save. Janela knocks Mercer off the top and through another table at ringside, setting up a superplex through that rather lame looking door.

A top rope stomp onto the door onto Christian gets two but he’s back up with a quick DDT. They slug it out from their knees until Hyatt grabs Christian’s leg (only took her two tries). Christian pulls her in so Janela makes the save…and Hyatt hits Janela with the Gucci bag. A stomp onto the bag retains the title at 29:44.

Rating: D+. Janela has a tendency to go long in his matches and that was certainly the case here. This is a match that could have easily had fifteen minutes chopped off as they just didn’t have much going on here. Christian can do the moves well but he isn’t exactly a thrilling star otherwise. Janela did what he could but they couldn’t have telegraphed the ending any harder. Not a good main event, mainly as it went on WAY too long.

The fans throw in trash (the referee is NOT happy) to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This show started off well enough but it went on about four hours in total and the fans were just done by the main event. It’s a show where they needed to cut some time off from more than a few matches. I liked the show well enough and a good chunk of it had some of that strong GCW crowd energy, but the main event was rough. It doesn’t help that there is nothing worth going out of your way to see. Spring Break is supposed to be one of the really fun events and this was more forgettable than anything else.

Results
Rina Yamashita/Masha Slamovich b. Minoru Suzuki/Masato Tanaka – Crucifix to Tanaka
East West Express/Mike Bailey b. Rock N Roll Express/Kerry Morton – Double middle rope cutter to Ricky
Dragon Gate Classic b. Reiwa New Generation – Crucifix to Minoura
Cole Radrick won the Grab The Brass Ring Ladder Match
Matt Cardona b. Blue Pain – Radio Silence
Amazing Red b. Gringo Loco – Code Red
Mance Warner b. Effy when Effy quit
Nick Gage/Maki Itoh b. Danhausen/Ram Kaicho – Stereo falling headbutts
Blake Christian b. Joey Janela – Stomp onto a Gucci bag

 

 

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Joey Janela’s Spring Break 6 Night Two: The Greatest Clusterf……Hey It’s My 8000th Review!

Joey Janela’s Spring Break 6 Night Two
Date: April 1, 2022
Location: Fair Park, Dallas, Texas
Commentators: Dave Prazak, Kevin Gill

It’s the second half of the show and in this case, it needs to get a pretty big upgrade over the first half. Night one was a decent enough show, but it wasn’t memorable, which is the point of a show like this. Now that being being said, this show is built around the Clusterf*** Battle Royal, which could be quite the mess. Let’s get to it.

Here is Night One if you need a recap.

We open with Joey Janela talking about beating Sean Waltman last night and wanting his flowers. He wonders why the fans hate him now but Spring Break needs a lethal dose of poison to turn it back into what it is supposed to be. This year, he is entering the Clusterf*** so he can end it once and for all. Maybe just don’t run it then?

Matt Cardona vs. Chris Dickinson

Chelsea Green is here with Cardona, who is currently the king, meaning yes he does have a Macho King crown. Green gets in an ALL HAIL THE DEATHMATCH KING and the fans are all over Cardona again. Cardona insults GCW and says they are the power couple of wrestling. Six years ago, he won the Intercontinental Title at Wrestlemania, but now he’s in this piece of garbage ring. If he was in WWE, like he should be, he would be celebrating his friend Mark Calaway, who he will see in the Hall of Fame one day.

Dickinson comes out with….MISSY HYATT to even things out, which is one of those names that makes this show feel fun. Both pairs share good luck kisses before the match, with Hyatt’s leaving Dickinson woozy. Dickinson wrestles him to the mat to start but Cardona is up to yell at Hyatt. That doesn’t work well for Dickinson, who grabs a cross armbreaker to send Cardona bailing to the floor.

Back in and Green grabs Dickinson’s foot for a distraction so Cardona can stomp away. After throwing his shirt at Hyatt, Cardona chokes with the wrist tape and then his hand for a bonus. The running forearm drops Dickinson again and a neckbreaker gives Cardona two. It’s already door time but Cardona spends too much time mocking the crowd, allowing Dickinson to backdrop him through the door in the corner.

The slugout is on with Cardona going to the eyes, only to get blasted with a running clothesline. The brainbuster gives Dickinson two but Green offers a distraction, allowing Cardona to nail a spear for two. Missy finally grabs Cardona’s boot and slaps Green, allowing Dickinson to hit a Death Valley Driver for two of his own.

Green offers another distraction so Cardona can hit a low blow into the Rough Ryder for two. Now it’s Green coming in and hitting Cardona with Missy’s loaded purse by mistake, allowing Dickinson to clothesline her down. The toss Razor’s Edge is enough for Dickinson to pin both of them at once at 12:43.

Rating: C+. You really can see why the GCW fans can’t stand Cardona in this run as he is one of the most annoying and obnoxious heels you could want to see. He is playing up the idea of being a big shot and that is one of the best ways to get heat from anyone. Dickinson is a decent power guy and looked good here, though Missy kind of disappeared for large chunks of the match.

Biff Busick vs. Tony Deppen

Feeling out process to start with Deppen trying to go to the mat to little success. Back up and Busick goes to the armbar, which has Deppen bailing to the ropes. Busick chops the heck out of Deppen, whose chops back have no effect. They head outside with Busick uppercutting away but a chop only hits the post. With Busick trying to shake it off, Deppen hits a flip dive off the apron and they head back inside.

Busick is fine enough to knee him down and the figure four necklock sends Deppen to the ropes again. Back up and Busick gets a little more violent by holding Deppen in place for some slaps to the face. Deppen is smart enough to go after Busick’s bad hand but Busick hits a running uppercut to take him down again.

Busick misses a charge though and Deppen hits a suicide flip dive for two back inside. Back up and the slugout goes to Busick until Deppen goes for the hand and grabs a Kimura of all things. With that broken up, Busick wins another strike off but Deppen avoids a charge in the corner. A running knee finishes Busick at 11:40.

Rating: B-. Sometimes you need two people to hit each other really hard and you got at least half of that here with Busick’s beating. Busick might not be a star in the making, but he’s an established hard hitter in the middle of the card and that should be enough to get him quite a few jobs. At the same time, you have Deppen as one of the better heels I’ve seen in a bit, as he is just straight up unlikable. Keep going with that and he’ll be fine.

Post match Deppen thanks Busick for the match but tells anyone who doesn’t believe in him what they can kiss.

Mike Bailey vs. Jordan Oliver

Bailey does his bow and they shake hands to start. Oliver does his pose so Bailey kicks him in the face and strikes away but Oliver is back up with chops of his own. Bailey’s leapfrog is countered into a faceplant and Oliver sends him outside for a big dive. Some kicks send Oliver through some chairs though and Bailey knees him in the chest.

Back in and Bailey kicks him in the chest for two, followed by the YES Kicks to make it worse. Bailey hits a running kick to the face in the corner and they strike it out again. Oliver snaps off a release German suplex and a sitout powerbomb for two but Bailey sends him outside. There’s the springboard moonsault to the floor and they strike it out on the apron.

Bailey gets the better of things and hits the moonsault knees, setting up the bouncing kicks back inside. The big kick to the head looks to set up the Ultimate Weapon but Oliver counters it with a cutter. A handspring cutter gets two so Oliver goes up, only to get pulled down with something like a One Winged Angel for the pin at 10:01.

Rating: C+. As is usually the case with Bailey, the action was good but he continues to have such a punchable face that it is hard to get into his matches. The good thing here was he didn’t have the stupid no selling that drags down every good thing he does, making this slightly easier to watch than most of his matches. Oliver has come a long way but still has a good bit to go before he moves up to the next level.

Effy says he shouldn’t be here but tonight he’ll beat Minoru Suzuki, have his own show tomorrow, and then maybe he’ll come for some gold.

Effy vs. Minoru Suzuki

Allie Katch is here with Effy. They both stick their jaws out with offers of a free shot but Effy’s attempt at a kiss gets him slapped. Suzuki slaps him down and then a kick to the face puts Effy on the floor. They head outside with Effy telling him to chop as hard as he can. That’s fine with Suzuki, who mocks Effy’s return chops.

A big boot sends Effy through the chairs and Suzuki cranks on the arm back inside. Effy tries some forearms but gets dropped with a single one from Suzuki. Then Effy bites Suzuki’s nipple and northern lights suplexes him for two. The big kiss staggers Suzuki but it’s a slap to the face and the Gotch style piledriver to give Suzuki the pin at 9:04.

Rating: C. Effy’s stuff may or may not be your cup of tea but Suzuki more or less squashed him here in a match with little to no doubt about the outcome. Effy was doing little more than comedy here so it isn’t like there was much to get annoyed about. They were going for the “wouldn’t it be funny if these two wrestled” idea here and I’ve seen worse versions.

Greatest Clusterf***

So this is basically a Royal Rumble, but only in the very loosest of terms. There are no set time intervals and I don’t believe there is a set number of entrants. I’m not going to be able to keep track of all of the eliminations, as I’ve never seen a version of this where they are all announced. This is going to be about total chaos and some surprise entrants and nothing more. You can be eliminated by pinfall, submission, over the top, leaving the building and…death?

Joey Janela is in at #1 and Buff Bagwell is in at #2 for your first surprise. Granted Buff is on a crutch but he has the American Males theme so this could be a lot worse. Janela wants to strut with him but it’s a superkick to get rid of Buff very quickly. George Gatton, with an unidentified title, is in at #3 and it’s a superkick into a piledriver to get rid of him too. Judas Judd Cassidy (I think?) is in at #4 and gets thrown over the top just as fast.

Yoya is in at #5 and suplexes Janela but gets caught in a heck of a package piledriver for the pin. Billie Starkz is in at #6 and a Gory Bomb takes Janela down but he raises knees to block her Swanton. That’s it for Starkz and it’s Juicy Finau (a big guy) in at #7. Janela can’t suplex him so Finau does it to Janela instead and it’s the even larger Sam Stackhouse, in Bam Bam Bigelow inspired gear, in at #8.

That leaves Janela to get crushed in the corner by back to back splashes but Stackhouse misses an ugly moonsault. Janela tosses both of them and it’s Rhett Titus in at #9 as Janela keeps up his Brock Lesnar-esque run. Titus wrestles him down and hits the running boot in the corner until it’s the Invisible Man in at #10.

So we have the Invisible Man, Janela and Titus with Titus and the Man slugging it out. The Man gets the better of both of them but an elbow to the face lets Janela and Titus beat him down. A double suplex lets the two of them pose but Man is back with a double low blow. The Man throws out Titus but gets stomped down until Dante Leon is in at #11. They waste no time in the next entrant with Ninja Mack in at #12.

Leon and Mack are long time rivals so they pose at each other before superkicking Janela down. A shooting star piledriver drops Mack and it’s a sick looking Jimmy Lloyd in at #13. Janela and Lloyd put on masks and they rehash their Social Distancing match, meaning they punch from a safe distance. Mack isn’t having that and kicks Lloyd down, setting up the running flip dive to drop Janela on the floor. Back in and Lloyd runs Mack over for the pin and Early Morning Guy Steele is in at #14.

Steele doesn’t seem to know what he is doing and falls off the top as Janela and Lloyd watch from the middle of the ring. Then Steele gives them a running double Blockbuster and a Canadian Destroyer each. Then he goes up top for a 450 to Lloyd, only to get rolled up for the pin from Janela. That was a weird one and it’s Blake Christian in at #15. House is cleaned but the Invisible Man hits Christian low. That earns him a dropkick and it’s Kevin Blackwood in at #16.

Blackwood’s suplex gets two on Leon and stomps on Janela in the corner until Hoodfoot is in at #17. Hoodfoot and Blackwood slug it out until Slade is in at #18. Young Dumb And Broke (Charlie Tiger and Ellis Taylor) are in at #19 and #20, giving us Janela, Invisible Man, Leon, Lloyd, Christian, Blackwood, Hoodfoot, Slade, Tiger and Taylor as this is far more organized than I was expecting. Everyone hits everyone until Deranged is in at #21 to clean house. With that going nowhere, Grim Reefer is in at #22 and has a smoke.

We now pause for everyone to partake, including Janela, who says he isn’t with AEW anymore and can do what he wants. Janela runs to the back (I don’t think he’s been eliminated but who can tell around here?) and Sandra Moone is in at #23. Reefer clotheslines her down and it’s Parrow in at #24. House is cleaned with Deranged and Reefer being eliminated almost immediately.

Big F’N Vin is in at #25 as Janela is having some Cheetos. Vin kicks Parrow out without much trouble as Janela wants to know his next spot. Nate Webb is in at #26 and comes through the crowd, who sings his theme music. Lloyd gets dropped by the Invisible Man, who hammers on Webb in the corner. Janela superkicks the Invisible Man though and tosses him out, much to the fans’ annoyance. Webb misses a charge and gets low bridged to the floor and Hoodfoot is tossed as well.

Shazza McKenzie is in at #27 and goes after Janela to start the beating. Janela gets in a shot to the face though and grabs a door, only to have McKenzie spear him through it. Janai Kai is in at #28 and Jazzy Yang (Jimmy Wang’s daughter) follows her at #29. The four women in the match stare each other down and it’s Edith Surreal in at #30. That gives us Janela, Leon, Lloyd, Christian, Blackwood, Tiger, Ellis, Moone, Vin, McKenzie, Kai, Yang and Surreal, assuming I didn’t miss any random eliminations.

Dark Sheik, another woman, is in at #31 and we have a six woman showdown. Uh make that seven as LuFisto is in at #32. Some of the guys come in to go after the women, with Leon and Taylor being tossed out. The women all beat up Tiger and toss him out with Vin joining him. Then the women get into it, with Kai kicking out LuFisto. Moone is out as well and McKenzie hits a Stunner on Kai for the elimination. Janela comes back in to superkick McKenzie for the pin and it’s Maven of all people in at #33.

Everyone stops to look at him so Maven hits a bunch of dropkicks….and then walks out for an elimination. Fans: “THANK YOU MAVEN!” With everyone else pairing off, Sean Ross Sapp, yes the dirt sheet writer, is in at #34, drawing a WE WANT MELTZER chant. Sapp gets a mic and begs people to subscribe to Fightful Select so they can read about GCW wrestlers getting fired by AEW. Josh Barnett, former UFC Heavyweight Champion, is in at #35 but fellow writer Denise Salcedo (not in the match) comes in to low blow Sapp and toss him out.

Nasty Leroy is in at #36 and Barnett blasts him with a clothesline as Jimmy Wang Yang is in at #37. Yang manages to take him down (not the prettiest but it worked) so Jazzy (remember, Yang’s daughter) comes in to grab the leg, which apparently counts as a submission to get rid of Barnett. Jazzy rolls up Lloyd for an elimination and it’s Alec Price in at #38. Price tosses Yang and dances a bit before getting kicked in the face by Jazzy. That’s enough for Price to toss her as well and it’s Cole Radrick in at #39.

Radrick and Price wind up on the apron and it’s a double elimination. Brandon Kirk is in at #40, giving us Janela, Christian, Blackwood, Slade, Surreal, Sheik, Leroy and Kirk (I think at least). Sheik hits Kirk low as we’re told Slade has left the building. Janela runs the ropes a lot until Lord Adrean (a Wal-Mart Guy) is in at #41. Adrean cleans house and Tombstones Kirk for the elimination, only to get Death Valley Drivered by Janela for another elimination. Kevin Matthews (you might remember him as KM in Impact) is in at #42 and stares it down with Leroy.

A not great looking Rock Bottom plants Matthews and a worse Rock Bottom sets up a leglock for the tap as Janela busts a gut laughing. Then Janela hits Leroy low and pins him and it’s Nick Wayne in at #43 for a brawl on the apron with Janela. Wayne superkicks Janela out for one heck of a pop and here is B-Boy to introduce Team LA Fights, which are six unnamed people. The team (Jai Vidal and Jack Cartwheel are two of them) clean house and something like a Styles Clash into a sitout powerbomb gets rid of Blackwood.

With those six in at #44-49, the Second City Crew (AJ Gray/Mance Warner/Matthew Justice/1 Called Manders and Levi Everett) are in #50-#54. The Crew cleans house with Matt Vandagriff (of LA Fights) being tossed. Damian Drake and Ju Dizz (I think) are both out with Hunter Freeman joining them. Cartwheel gets knocked out but walks on his hands until Manders chairs him down for the elimination. Vidal is tossed out and the Crew is left alone until the others still in the match come in.

Christian and Wayne get together to toss Everett and Manders. Somehow Christian and Wayne are the last two with Christian hitting a quick Downward Spiral for the pin…and never mind as yeah there are some people still left. Sheik comes in off the top with a spinwheel kick and the rest of the Crew pile onto her for the pin. Christian goes after the Crew but gets taken down and superplexed into a top rope legdrop for the pin….and that’s it at 1:23:57 (I guess Surreal was tossed somewhere in there).

Rating: C+. To be clear, this match is not about something coherent or anything more than having one name after another. That being said, this was WAY more coherent than the previous edition and that helped a lot. This felt more like a very indy Royal Rumble and, save for Surreal, no one was getting lost in the whole thing. I had a good time with this and it did fly by with some fun moments. It’s the kind of match that I was expecting from a Spring Break and it went well, especially with all of the insanity that came with it.

Overall Rating: B-. This was more like the Spring Breaks of the past and it worked out pretty well all things considered. It was a collection of some fun matches before we got to the big main event and that wound up working well. Good stuff here and it didn’t feel like a regular GCW show. While those can be fun, it’s not what I came into this wanting. The main event is all that mattered here and the other four matches were a nice bonus so we’ll call this a success.

 

 

 

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Joey Janela’s Spring Break 6 Night 1: Wake Me When It’s Summer

Joey Janela’s Spring Break 6 Night One
Date: March 31, 2022
Location: Fair Park, Dallas, Texas
Commentators: Kevin Gill, Lenny Leonard

This is probably the crown jewel of the indy shows over Wrestlemania Weekend, just because of how insane it can get. Janela’s shows have a tendency to be completely nuts with some incredibly fun stuff and surprises. I’m actually looking forward to this one just for the atmosphere so let’s get to it.

Tag Team Titles: Second Gear Crew vs. Briscoes vs. Nick Gage

Gage is defending on his own as his partner, Matt Tremont, couldn’t make the show. Like him or not, Gage continues to be over like free beer in a frat house. It’s a big brawl to start and the doors are already brought in. The Briscoes bring in some chairs as well but Warner chokeslams Jay through a door for two. Mark is back up and Swantons Warner, sitting in a chair, down for a big crash.

Gage grabs the broken door and drops a twisting Vader Bomb onto Warner before stopping for the MDK chants. A piece of the table is used to carve up Warner’s head….and here is Slade to throw Gage a pizza cutter. Apparently Slade is Gage’s partner and he’ll carve up Warner’s head as well. Then Slade cuts himself because these people are not normal. Jay is back up to clean house, including Redneck Boogie to Slade.

Justice comes in with some chair shots and let’s bridge a door over some open chairs. Gage is up with some chair shots and now it’s time for a staple gun. Warner’s tongue is stapled to the door (good grief) but a piledriver through the door rips it free. Back in and Jay hits a Jay Driller into a Froggy Bow to give Mark two, with Slade making the save. Slade tries to fight off the Briscoes but it’s a Doomsday Device to give Jay the pin and the titles at 11:15.

Rating: C+. The nutty violence aside (hopefully far aside), this was an energetic match with the Briscoes adding some credibility to the whole thing. As much as I can’t stand Gage, he is the biggest star in the world to this audience and starting the show with him is a smart thing to do. Let him go out there and pop the crowd like no one else in GCW and get the show off to a hot start, especially if he is going to lose the titles with an out.

Post match the Briscoes celebrate before leaving Gage to get a hero’s applause.

Allie Katch is sitting in a room with candles around. Tonight she is facing Mickie James, who isn’t her dream match, but rather her fantasy. We get the infamous Mickie finger lick from the Trish Stratus match as this took a sharp turn.

Jeff Jarrett gets in his car, thinks he sees someone behind him, gets out to check, finds nothing, and gets back in.

AR Fox vs. Blake Christian

This should be fun and Fox’s wife Ayla is here with him. The fans are behind Christian as he flips out of a headscissors to start. Fox kicks him away and we get a staredown into a handshake. A dropkick sends Christian into the corner for a running clothesline but Christian picks the pace right back up. Christian’s dropkick into a nipup but Fox sends him outside for a heck of a running dive.

Fox gets a running charge for a boot to the face in the chairs but Christian drops him with a hard shot of his own. Back in and Christian hits a low superkick but can’t get a Border City Stretch. Instead Fox bails to the floor, allowing Christian to take him down with a dive of his own. Fox is fine enough to hit a twisting suplex for two and it’s time to slug it out.

Both of them try a cutter at the same time and we get a double breather. It’s Fox up with a rolling cutter into a rolling cutter for two but Christian hits Three Amigos, because Eddie Guerrero. A frog splash, also because Eddie Guerrero, gives Christian two but Fox is back up with Lo Mein Pain (middle rope Spanish Fly, which I’m guessing is somehow connected to Eddie Guerrero is well). Fox hits a 450 for two but Christian grabs a Spanish Fly into a wind up double arm DDT (that’s different, and called the Golden Trident) for the pin at 12:37.

Rating: B-. Yeah this was a fun one as Fox is about as much of a guaranteed good match as you’ll find on the indies. He’s just smooth in the ring and works well with anyone so this couldn’t have gone much better. Christian has been popping up more and more lately and you can see the talent in him. He’ll need something to make him stand out more but so far so pretty good.

Mickie James vs. Allie Katch

Effy is here with Katch. They fight over a lockup to start as we talk about what James has done so far this year. Katch takes her down but James flips up and we have a standoff. Mickie grabs a snapmare to set up a running kick to the chest but Katch is right back for the chop exchange.

The hurricanrana out of the corner is countered with a (rather enthusiastic) Katch powerbomb for two so Mickie kicks her low. Katch is fine enough to kick her down in the corner for a Cannonball and let’s bring in a door. Instead of, you know, using it, Katch knees her in the face to knock Mickie silly.

That means it’s time to load up two chairs and a door over them but Mickie flapjacks her through it instead. The top rope Thesz press gives Mickie two but the MickieDT is broken up. With neither going anywhere, they trade crotch grabs until a headbutt drops Mickie for two more. Back up and Mickie kisses Katch, kicks her in the face, and grabs the MickieDT for the pin at 11:18.

Rating: C+. Katch is someone who shows her potential every time she’s in there and it’s good for her to work with a legend like James, who can make her that much better. The match was pretty good as well, with the two of them hitting each other rather hard, though the violence was out of place. They also went a bit too far with the callbacks to Mickie vs. Trish Stratus, but the good parts were good enough to carry this far enough.

Post match Katch gets on the fans for booing James, because there is no Katch without James. Oh and that was the first ever women’s match at Spring Break. How is that possible?

Ninja Mack vs. Alec Price vs. Gringo Loco vs. Jack Cartwheel vs. Jimmy Lloyd vs. Jordan Oliver vs. Nick Wayne

One fall to a finish because we need a scramble match. They stare each other down to start and lock knuckles before going into the big series of kicks to the head. Everyone misses some kind of running splash and it’s another seven way staredown a minute in. The dives to the floor take some people down, setting up Loco’s big dive onto everyone else. Back in and Price hits an Alberto double stomp on Loco, followed by Cartwheel sweeping Lloyd’s legs.

Wayne tries to flip back in but gets sent ribs first into the corner by Lloyd. We settle down to Wayne vs. Oliver in a slugout until Oliver blocks a moonsault with raised knees. Cartwheel comes in to clear the ring but gets taken down by Mack for a twisting moonsault. Loco dives onto a bunch of people, leaving Cartwheel to knock Price outside as well. Cartwheel hits his own dive and Wayne is back in with a springboard Ace Cutter for the pin on Lloyd at 8:11.

Rating: C+. This was every scramble match you’ve seen in a long time, as there is little that anyone can do to make themselves stand out in a match like this one. There are seven people in a match that got just over eight minutes. Wayne is someone I’ve heard a good deal about for the last few months and I haven’t seen much of him. After this, I still haven’t as he barely got any time to shine with everyone else in there at the same time.

Joey Janela vs. X-Pac

This should be….something. X-Pac looks great and Janela is in Razor Ramon style gear, as a rather horrible way to get into X-Pac’s head. Janela knocks him into the corner to start and chops away but has to duck a spinning kick to the head. The Bronco Buster misses as well so Janela heads outside, where X-Pac hits a running seated senton off the apron.

Janela is fine enough to post X-Pac seems rather pleased with the fans hating him (makes you wonder why they bought tickets to JOEY JANELA’S Spring Break but oh well). The boos turn into dueling chants as Janela grabs a chair and pulls X-Pac back inside. X-Pac fights out of the chinlock and grabs a tornado DDT for a much needed breather. Now the spinning kick to the head connects and they head to the apron, where Janela is fine enough to grab a Death Valley Driver.

It’s time to set up a door over a pair of chairs but Janela takes too long, allowing X-Pac to come back with a slingshot flip dive to put him through the door instead. The X-Factor gets two back inside but Janela pulls him into a Crossface. With that broken up, Janela pulls in a bunch of other plunder, meaning it’s another door bridged over two chairs, because that worked so well earlier.

Janela takes WAY too long setting that up and going to the top, meaning it’s a super X-Factor through the door….for two as Janela gets a foot on the rope. Back up and Janela hits a super brainbuster for two and a double stomp through the door gets two more. Janela goes up again and gets shoved off the top and through another door at ringside. Back in and X-Pac chairs Janela down but a low blow and superkick lets Janela get the pin at 19:23.

Rating: C. This match just got on my nerves as X-Pac was doing his thing and trying to have a match while Janela was doing every stupid stunt that he could, none of which he bothered to sell. I know Janela is a big deal around here but you could see the difference in quality here and it was annoying seeing this be all about Janela. X-Pac might not be some all time legend (though he was very good), but he deserved better than this.

Post match X-Pac thanks the fans and puts over GCW, which he says is his family today. If you’re not down with X-Pac and GCW, he has two words for you.

GCW World Title: Jon Moxley vs. AJ Gray

Moxley is defending and Gray’s Extreme Title isn’t on the line. They start a bit slowly with Moxley taking him into the corner but getting shoved away. Gray takes the leg out and nails a spinwheel kick to the face to drop the champ (at least the one defending). A slugout goes to Gray and they head outside where Moxley suckers him in and takes the fight into the crowd.

You can’t actually see what they’re doing for a bit until Moxley gets into an open space and poses a bit before being knocked back to ringside by a bloody Gray. Moxley is fine enough to suplex Gray at ringside and it’s time for a barbed wire door. A release suplex drops Gray onto said barbed wire onto said door before Moxley stabs him with some barbed wire sheers. The barbed wire is used for a low blow and then wrapped around Gray’s face to make it worse.

A neckbreaker, with barbed wire, gives Moxley two and it’s off to an STF, complete with more barbed wire. Since that isn’t violent enough, Moxley puts the barbed wire door up in the corner and is speared (or kind of shoved) through it, due to wrestling rule #37. Gray hits a moonsault, mainly on Moxley’s face, for two and it’s ladder time, because of course it is. That’s not enough so here’s a door to go with it, with the ladder set at ringside and the door on some chairs close enough to it.

An STO on the apron rocks Moxley again and Gray elbows him off the ladder through the door. Back in and they get up to slug it out, because that kind of a spot is just there in a match like this. Gray blasts him with a lariat for two and it’s time for some….light tubes wrapped in barbed wire. That’s so stupid it even has Moxley backing up, only to come back with a jumping cutter onto the tubes for two. That and a piledriver get two, followed by a Death Rider onto more light tubes to retain the title at 22:18.

Rating: C. The match felt big, but every time they started to get something going, the violence got to be too much. The bigger thing here though was Moxley’s star power, which was more than enough to carry the match. Gray is someone who has impressed me just about every time I’ve seen him and he was good here, but as usual, the light tubes and doors were too much for it to be that great.

Post match they shake hands and respect is show.

Ultraviolent Title: John Wayne Murdoch vs. Alex Colon

Murdoch is challenging and Colon has beaten him a few times before. Colon has a bunch of belts around his waist and shoulders, most of which aren’t identified. Murdoch isn’t about to wait and hits him in the head with some light tubes during the Big Match Intros so we’re starting fast. Some whips send Colon into a variety of things in the corner and against the ropes before tossing him off the top, through a table covered with more light tubes.

Colon is already busted so Murdoch drives more glass into the head. Back in and Colon whips him through a door in the corner, followed by a running knee to drive light tubes into Murdoch’s chest. Then Colon stabs himself with broken tubes, which he then drives into Murdoch’s head. They headbutt it out on the floor before coming back inside, where Colon hits him with another light tube.

More light tubes do the same thing as the previous light tubes but Murdoch pops up and hits a piledriver. Colon pops back up and sends Murdoch outside, setting up a suicide dive with a light tube. Murdoch avoids a charge into the post and we pause as Colon might be seriously injured. Colon’s bloody arm is covered in a towel so Murdoch suplexes him onto more light tubes for two. A board to the arm sets up a cross armbreaker to give Murdoch the title at 13:48.

Rating: D. I can’t stand this kind of match as it’s the same stuff over and over. How many times are you supposed to hit someone with a light tube before it stops meaning anything? In this case it would be about two out of the thirty or so tubes they probably used before a dumb ending. What is there to say here? You had two guys hit each other with light tubes over and over until someone won. Rather downer of a main event and that’s never a good thing.

Post match Murdoch talks a lot of trash and tells Colon to get out to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The show was actually pretty ok for the most part, save for a terrible main event. Swap in Moxley, who felt like a much bigger star, into that spot and the show is better, but still not great. Spring Break has always been one of the more fun shows over Wrestlemania weekend and that really wasn’t the case here. It’s not an awful show, but there is nothing memorable or overly fun here and that hurt things a lot. Mickie James and X-Pac are cool, but they aren’t enough to make the show feel all that important. Hopefully night two is better though, because this was the least memorable Spring Break show to date.

 

 

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Zicky Dice’s Trouble In Paradise 2: It’s Either Fun Or Not Fun

Zicky Dice’s Trouble In Paradise 2
Date: April 1, 2022
Location: Fairmont Hotel, Dallas, Texas
Commentators: Jonny Loquasto, Zick Dicey, Matthew Rehwoldt

This is another of the Wrestlemania Weekend shows and in this case, it is another WrestleCon show. I didn’t actually take this one in as I went to Axxess instead and I’m not sure what this is going include. That can make for some very fun shows as well and hopefully that is the case again. Let’s get to it.

The opening video features Zicky Dice standing on a train track as the Outlandish Paradise Express train comes straight for him. Dice whips out some, uh, dice, and throws them at the train, which explodes.

We meet the commentary team, which includes Zick Dicey, a puppet, who isn’t mic’d well. They aren’t thrilled with waiting so long on ring announcer Chris Van Vliet taking his sweet time getting to the ring.

Van Vliet finally comes to the ring (about eight minutes into the broadcast) to fire up the crowd, including those watching on Twitch (where the original broadcast took place). The opening video plays on the screen and here is Zicky Dice himself. Dice if fired up to be here, partially because it’s a tax write off. He doesn’t have a match tonight so send him Lex Luger or Bret Hart. The open challenge to anyone upstairs at WrestleCon is on to anyone with a broken hip or any old guy.

Cue Matt Cardona, who is mad over Dice crashing the Major Figures Pod last night. Cardona asks who the f*** is paying him to be here, asking if it’s Dice, Twitch, Mike from WrestleCon or whoever else. Dice may be the King of the Internet but he’s the Internet Champion and should be out there. That’s cool with Dice, who references Chelsea Green and a banana before issuing the challenge for an Impact Wrestling Digital Media Title shot. Let’s do a Twitch sub goal and make it falls count anywhere. Game on.

Impact Wrestling Digital Media Title: Matt Cardona vs. Zicky Dice

Dice is challenging and it’s falls count anywhere. Cardona tries Radio Silence to start but gets powerbombed down for an early two. They go to the floor and trade slams until Cardona is whipped hard into the steps. Back in and Cardona spits some water in his face so Dice puts his hands into his own trunks, only to have Cardona shove them into his mouth.

Cardona goes to hammer away in the corner but gets bit in the leg and tossed to the floor. They fight into the crowd with Dice hitting a suplex on the concrete for two. Things move into the lobby (where Chelsea Green can be seen going up the escalator), where Cardona hits a Reboot against the steps to retain at 5:38.

Rating: C. This was a bit of a disappointment as they didn’t do much with the stipulation, but I can understand the idea of not being able to brawl around a rather fancy hotel. At the same time, they were trying to get Dice on the show and Cardona is a pretty big name compared to the rest of the card. Not exactly a great match, but it felt big enough for something like this.

Post match Cardona hits him with a sign, sending Dice riding up the escalator.

The puppet’s mic has been fixed.

Deonn Rusman vs. Jonah Turk

Turk is a rather large man (weighing in at “a metric ton of love”) and apparently someone Dice does not like on his Twitch stream. Rusman shoves Turk into the corner to start and a single shoulder puts Turk down again. Turk manages to run him over for a breather though and goes to the middle rope. That means a powerbomb out of the corner, setting up a spear to give Rusman the pin at 2:49. Turk getting in the ring seemed to be a joke for Dice’s Twitch stream so you can’t get too mad at a nothing match here.

Post match Rusman spears him again for fun.

Jah-C vs. Levi Shapiro vs. Keita Murray vs. Lord Crewe vs. Carlie Bravo vs. Darian Bengston

One fall to a finish because we need a (Sensational Sextuplet) Scramble match. Bengston (“the Shakespeare geek”) gets jumped from behind to start and tossed to the floor, which at least clears the ring for a bit. Keita stands in the corner and warms up while the other four brawl inside. That means a big double middle finger from Keita, earning him a four way boot to the face. We settle down to Shapiro powerslamming Jah-C but Bravo is up to clean house.

Crewe and Bravo slug it out with Crewe dropping him, only to get jumped by Bengston. We settle down to Crewe vs. Shapiro before they start to powerbombing Jah-C and Bravo. The other four get back in for stereo double belly to back suplexes and everyone is down. Jah-C DDTs Keita into the corner but Shapiro pulls him outside. That earns Shapiro a crotching on the top and it’s time for the string of flip dives. Shapiro cuts off the referee’s dive (Loquasto: “I don’t know what is going on here.”) but the second attempt connects to wipe out the pile on the floor.

Back in and Bengston hits a tiger driver 98 on Bravo but the referee gets pulled out. There’s the required Tower of Doom, allowing Bravo to come off the top with a splash for two. Crewe gets to clean house for a bit before we hit a short form version of the parade of secondary (I think?) finishers. Jah-C Finally hits a superkick to finish Bengston at 11:18.

Rating: C+. I have never been a fan of this kind of match as there are a bunch of people flying around and trying their best to get some spotlight while also having to sell for everyone else. That doesn’t make for the best match and that was the case again here. There were some cool spots, as always, but no one got to stand out in the slightest. That can get a bit old and it isn’t like anyone gets much out of something like this other than an appearance.

Everyone but Bengston leaves so here are the New Japan LA Dojo to beat Bengston down. Bengston is out of the Factory and the two schools aren’t getting along. Fair enough.

Lince Dorado vs. Black Taurus

Dorado’s new gimmick seems to be that he is a marijuana enthusiast, though he does stop to say hello to superfan Vladimir (of the unreleased documentary fame). Neither of them can get a hurricanrana to start so Dorado offers Taurus a puff. With that not working, Dorado dropkicks him to the floor but the running flip dive is pulled out of the air. A powerbomb sends Dorado into the barricade, with commentary saying “when you mess with the bull, sometimes you get the horns and sometimes you get powerbombed into the barricade”.

Taurus sends him into the barricade a few times and then hits Dorado square in the mask. Back in and Dorado can’t get a cross armbreaker so he settles for a German suplex and a springboard moonsault press for two each. Taurus is right back with a pop up Samoan drop for two of his own but Dorado grabs the Golden Rewind. A crucifix bomb drops Taurus and Dorado hits a pair of moonsaults to send him outside.

That’s fine with Dorado, who hits a big dive to the floor. Back in and a poisonrana plants Taurus for two more but Taurus hits a powerbomb backbreaker to cut Dorado off fast. They go to the same corner, where Dorado snaps off a super hurricanrana and lands on his feet, because of course he can do that. A shooting star press gives Dorado the pin at 12:04.

Rating: B-. I liked this one more than I was expecting to as the power vs. speed formula works again. The Lucha Lit gimmick for Dorado might not have the longest shelf life but it certainly gets your attention, at least in the short term. Taurus continues to feel like a huge monster and while it is a big weird to see him lose here, he should be fine going forward just by letting him beat people up.

Post match they share some of Dorado’s….stuff.

Mike Bailey vs. Effy

Submission match. Bailey sneaks up behind him to start and hits the big flip dive to the floor. They go into the stands where Effy chokes but gets pulled into a cross armbreaker. An STF, using a chair (that’s a new one), has Effy in trouble for a bit before they head inside for some chops to stagger Effy some more. Back up and Effy ducks a kick to the face and tries a rollup as he forgets the rules.

Instead Effy tries a leg choke in the corner before trying a kneebar…but he doesn’t know what he’s doing so Bailey laughs at him. They slap each other with Bailey getting the better of things so Effy goes with an atomic drop. A backdrop sets up something like a dragon sleeper but Bailey slips out and spins him into a rather nasty Deathlock. With that not working, Effy is sent outside for the big dive as per Bailey’s custom.

Speaking of customs, Bailey misses his moonsault knees onto the apron, allowing Effy to wrap the knee around the post. Back in and Effy bites Bailey’s chest but gets taken down for the moonsault knees. The Ultimate Weapon connects for Bailey so he grabs a rear naked choke, which is reversed into….Effy biting the toe (after removing the boot and licking the sole) and Bailey taps at 13:07.

Rating: D+. I don’t know if I don’t get Effy or if I was missing the joke here but this really didn’t work. It was built around the comedy, but the comedy wasn’t working here. I’ve heard good things about Effy and I’ve seen him do some fun stuff before, though I couldn’t get into this one. Then again it might be due to getting sick of Bailey after so many matches from him this weekend.

Commentary recaps the night so far.

Masha Slamovich vs. The Bear

This was billed as an actual bear but we get….Parrow, who brings out a guy in a bear costume. The Bear is billed as being from Jellystone Park, though the fact that his graphic says Scotty 2 Hotty would suggest otherwise. Granted a previous graphic read “The Bear (Max The Impaler)” kind of killed the mood. The Bear beats up the handlers so Masha throws marshmallows at him, only to have the Bear grab a bearhug (you knew that was coming).

Masha gets thrown around even more but the referee gets a marshmallow in his face. A German suplex gives Masha a breather but she gets thrown down for trying a choke. Therefore, she tries to use the referee to appear bigger, as you do to deal with a bear. More of the Bear costume comes off before Masha chokes again and the Bear is out at 6:38.

Rating: D+. It wasn’t as long as the previous match but this one felt like they had a single joke but didn’t realize that they had to do something with it. The Bear looked good to start but then it was the same stuff over and over until Masha won with the fifth or so choke. This needed more jokes in the ring rather than on commentary and I wasn’t getting into it very well.

Rich Swann vs. Scotty 2 Hotty

Well it’s certainly a unique main event. Swann dances through the crowd on the way to the ring, as he tends to do. After the Big Match Intros, Scotty takes his hat off and throws it to Swann, who puts it on and then throws it over to the referee so we can get going. They take their time touching fingers to start and finally lock up. We hear about their histories and resumes before Rehwoldt talks about Scotty giving him the Worm before he debuted in NXT.

Swann kicks him into the corner to turn things a bit more serious but Scotty hands in the ropes (ala Andrade) to avoid a trip to the floor. A suplex drops Swann and that means the Moonwalk. The armbar keeps Swann in trouble for a bit but he sends Scotty outside for a change. Scotty is sat in a chair so Swann can run around the ring for a kick to the face.

It works so well that he does it again before cranking on both arms back inside. Scotty fights up for the dancing right hand but Swann is right back with the running flip ax kick. That doesn’t do Swann much good though as Scotty hits the bulldog that sets up the Worm. That sets up the Worm to give Scotty a pretty big upset at 9:20.

Rating: C. This is the definition of a fun main event and that’s all it needed to be. Scotty looked good in the ring and certainly didn’t appear to have anything resembling ring rust, which is more than I would have expected. Not a great match or anything, but I can see why this was something people, including me, would want to see.

Respect is shown post match. Swann goes to leave but hang on, because it is time to dance. Rehwoldt: “The options are yes or h*** yes. Take your pick.” The referee gets to play Rikishi for the big moment.

We cut to Zicky Dice in the back where he wants the stream started over as he rapidly thanks the sponsors to wrap it up.

A highlight reel finally ends the show.

Overall Rating: C. This is a show where it was never going to be a classic but it wasn’t supposed to be. Instead, we got about two and a half hours of fun stuff with some pretty decent wrestling included. It isn’t a show I’ll ever need to see again, but if you wanted a nice start to the most packed day of the WrestleCon schedule, this was a good way to go. Not a great or even a very good show, but they figured out how to have some fun without many resources available and that is a nice trick to pull off.

 

 

 

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The WRLD On GCW: They’ve Been Watching Too Much ECW

The Wrld On GCW
Date: January 23, 2022
Location: Hammerstein Ballroom, New York City, New York
Commentators: Dave Prazak, Kendall Gill
Hosts: Lenny Leonard, Pollo del Mar

Every now and then a show catches my attention and I’ll add it to the schedule. That is the case here, as GCW has become the hottest indy around at the moment and I’m going to give it a shot. I am absolutely not a fan of the deathmatch stuff, but apparently that kind of wrestling is not allowed in New York so we get a bit of a reprieve here. Let’s get to it.

Note that I barely follow GCW so I am not going to know much in the way of storylines or characters so please bear with me if I miss something.

Kickoff Show: Blue Ribbon Battle Royal

Psycho Clown, Dark Sheik, Cole Radrick, Parrow, Hoodfoot, Ruckus, Charles Mason, KTB, Juicy Finau, Steve Scott, Nate Webb, Big Vin, Brandon Kirk, Janai Kai, Dustin Thomas, Marcus Mathers, Yoya, B-Boy, Lufisto, Thunder Rosa

Clown jumps Parrow before most of the entrances have taken place and we’re starting fast. The huge Parrow fights him off but Sheik hits a pretty awesome looking jump up to his shoulders into a double stomp to the chest (kind of like Cameron Grimes’ Cave In). Sheik isn’t done and hits a top rope spinwheel kick to drop Radrick. Back up and Radrick runs Sheik over as more people come in (Are these entrances timed? That hasn’t been mentioned.), giving us Parrow vs. Ruckus.

Entrants keep coming in one at a time but with maybe fifteen seconds in between, making me wonder why they started so fast. Scott (I think? Commentary is too busy to say who these people are.) is clotheslined out as Big Vin takes his place. Vin grabs Sheik from the apron and backflips in for a World’s Strongest Slam (that’s a new one) before having a big hug with Finau.

The ring (which isn’t very big in the first place) is WAY too full here as Kirk is tossed. Thomas (the wrestler with no legs) comes in and hits a tornado DDT on KTB. Mathers and Yoya are in as Radrick is out in a hurry (and actually gets named). Mason (in a suit) is in next as this is just a free for all of people hitting one move after another with nothing close to coherence.

Now it’s B-Boy coming in as Clown hits a superbomb on Mason. Mathers (I think) is out with Sheik and KTB following him. Lufisto makes a big surprise return and there go Clown and Thomas. Thunder Rosa is the big surprise and final entrant so we look at her beating up Parrow in the corner while everyone else brawls.

Lufisto gets rid of Webb and B-Boy and we’re down to Lufisto, Parrow, Rosa, Mason and Vin. Rosa hurricanranas Parrow out and the women beat up Mason in the corner. Vin gets beaten down in an opposite corner until Rosa and Lufisto slug it out. Mason sneaks up and tosses Rosa but Lufisto suplexes both of them. Vin puts Lufisto on the apron and Mason drives Vin into her for the elimination. A low bridge sends Vin to the apron but he chokeslams Mason out for the win at 16:04.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t a good start to the night as I’m still not sure who all was in the match. Commentary didn’t do a good job of explaining what was going on and the camera work made it even harder to keep track of the whole thing. I’m not quite thrilled with where things are going from here, but hopefully we get something a little easier to follow going forward.

Kickoff Show: Jack Cartwheel vs. Alex Zayne vs. Grim Reefer vs. Shane Mercer vs. Ninja Mack vs. Dante Leon

No tags and one fall to a finish. Zayne is billed as The Sauce and from the nearest Taco Bell. The fact that he is from Lexington makes it even better. Mercer starts fast with a pop up powerslam on Reefer (that looked good) and there’s a big flip dive to drop some people on the floor. Cartwheel and Mack hit their stereo running flip dives to the floor, followed by dives from Zayne and Leon.

Reefer goes up, lights one up, and hits a big springboard flip dive to drop the pile. Back in and Mack punches away at Reefer before hitting the People’s Moonsault. Leon comes in for a cutter on Mack but gets powerslammed by Mercer. A super fireman’s carry flapjack drops Leon but Zayne clears the ring. Cartwheel takes him down for a slingshot hilo but Mercer is back up with a gorilla press drop.

Reefer kicks Mercer down and spins him into a Crossface with Leon making the save. Leon’s big cutter hits Reefer but Mercer plants Mack with a super backflip World’s Strongest Slam. Zayne is held in the ropes for a shooting star press from Cartwheel, driving Zayne into the apron. A chair is brought in but Reefer counters Mercer’s….something into a DDT onto the chair for the pin at 7:58.

Rating: C+. This was slightly easier to follow than the opener but that isn’t saying much. The thing to remember about a match like this is that it is all about getting your stuff in with nothing resembling a story being told. The match may be fun, but this is all about setting things up for the real card. Not exactly good, but a lot of fun and rather exciting, as is kind of the point.

Owner Brett Lauderdale comes out to hype up the crowd and talks about how hard it has been to get here. They were ready to take over the world but then the pandemic hit. He was told that a million GCW’s have come and gone but now they are here with the roster to make it work.

We get the entrances for the opener, which will start when the show goes on the air. This company has some AEW influences.

The opening video, which is rather quiet, shows a bunch of wrestlers in the empty building with their voiceovers talking about how they have no business at this level. Now they’re here to prove that they belong. Right on point here.

AJ Gray vs. PCO vs. Alex Colon vs. G-Raver vs. Tony Deppen vs. Jimmy Lloyd vs. Jordan Oliver

Ladder match, with the winner getting any title match they want at any time. AJ Gray is a surprise entrant as his scheduled opponent, Eddie Kingston, is out with an injury. They start fast (I’m not sure I heard a bell) with Deppen hitting a springboard dropkick to drive the ladder into Lloyd and Oliver.

Gray buckle bombs Deppen into the ladder in the corner and blasts him with a lariat before going up. His ladder is WAY too short though, meaning G-Raver does him a favor by throwing a ladder at Gray’s ladder for the save. PCO comes in, allowing Colon to lift up G-Raver for a Doomsday Device, albeit with a ladder shot instead of a clothesline to make it even worse. Colon hits PCO in the face with the ladder but Oliver dropkicks the ladder down to break up the double climb.

Oliver kicks Lloyd in the face and hits a dive to the floor. PCO hits his own running flip dive through the ropes. Deppen adds a double springboard flip dive to take out everyone, sending them walking up the aisle. As luck would have it, Gray is ready with his own running flip dive off the stage at the exact same time. PCO chairs Gray down and moonsaults off the top onto the big pile again.

That means PCO can climb, but he’s actually smart enough to drop down and beat up anyone trying to make a save. Deppen brings in a bigger ladder and bites PCO on the face but Jordan Oliver is there to cut him off. Lloyd breaks that up too but gets kicked down by Oliver. PCO chokeslams Oliver off of the ladder though and there’s a package piledriver onto the ladder to make it worse.

G-Raver and Colon break that up, with Raven putting Colon onto two chairs with a ladder over his back. Raver goes up, shoves the ring out of the way, and drops down onto the ladder onto Colon. Well that was dumb. Lloyd gives Raver a running Razor’s Edge over the top and onto a big pile of stuff on the floor. Gray goes up on a ladder on the floor and tries to dive into the ring, only to crash hard onto another ladder (the fact that I’m not sure who he was aiming for is a bad sign). Cue John Wayne Murdoch to take out Colon on the floor, leaving Gray to take the ring down at 15:11.

Rating: C-. The spots were good, but this was a very indy style ladder match, which is not meant as a compliment. There was too much going on between all of the people and it didn’t work so well. At the same time, you had a person shoving the ring out of the way to hurt someone else. That’s about as bad of a level of ladder match logic as you’ll find, making this quite the mess.

Gringo Loco/Demonic Flamita/Arez vs. Bandido/ASF/Laredo Kid

Lucha rules (duh) and it’s Arez starting with Kid. The trade early misses until Kid’s hurricanrana is easily blocked. An armdrag sends Kid outside so it’s Bandido coming in for Three Amigos. That means the Eddie dance as it’s a headscissors to send Arez outside. Loco comes in to hammer on Bandido, who is sent outside so ASF can come in. A wristdrag sends ASF outside for a change and it’s Flamita coming in to take his place.

The 619 in the corner looks to set up something off the top but Flamita flips off the crowd and drops down to flip the fans off instead. ASF is left alone in the corner, with Flamita and Arez hitting stereo moonsaults to the floor (that was sweet). Bandido and Kid get caught in stereo surfboards on the floor for the big running flip dive from Loco. ASF is sent outside as well, only to get launched over the top for the crash back inside (cool).

Flamita follows him back in for two, with ASF climbing Flamita to armdrag Loco. Bandido’s team is back in with stereo superkicks into stereo headscissors to the floor. The not quite stereo dives take out Loco and company but ASF and Kid miss missile dropkicks back inside. Flamita and Bandido are left alone for a big staredown, with Flamita kicking him down and hitting a huge frog splash.

ASF hits a 450 but Arez makes a save of his own. A dropkick breaks up Arez’s cover and a Death Valley Driver gets two on Flamita. It’s Bandido vs. Loco for a strike off until Bandido hits a heck of a tornado DDT. Back up and Bandido and Loco grab double electric chairs (as in Arez is on Flamita’s shoulders on Loco’s shoulders while ASF is on Kid’s shoulders on Bandido’s shoulders), leaving ASF and Arez to slug it out rather high in the air.

ASF snaps off a Canadian Destroyer (egads man) while Loco and Bandido hit powerbombs on the other two. Loco catches a charging Bandido in a Spanish Fly and everyone is down. Back up and Bandido LAUNCHES ASF over the top and into a hurricanrana on Loco. Flamita hits a dive, then Bandido hits a dive, then Kid Spanish Flies Arez off the top onto the pile. ASF and Loco seem to load up a super Canadian Destroyer but can’t get the timing right, leaving Loco to hit a regular piledriver for the pin at 14:10.

Rating: A-. The double electric chair was good enough to make this about as fun as it could have been and the rest was a bunch of insanity that you can only get in a match like this one. This kind of a match is designed to have a bunch of people flying around with one crazy spot after another and they made it work like only they can here. Bandido’s awesomeness has long since been established and it was on full display again with this one. Check this out, which you should always do with something involving these people.

Ian Riccaboni joins commentary.

Ring of Honor World Title: Blake Christian vs. Jonathan Gresham

Christian is challenging…or at least he would be if Gresham was here but we need to make a last second change. Worry not though, because we have a replacement.

Blake Christian vs. Lio Rush

Rush offers a handshake but Christian looks at him instead. They do shake left hands though and it’s an armdrag to take Rush down. Back up and Christian offers a handshake, which allows him to sunset flip Rush for two. Rush bails to the floor for a breather before heading back inside to avoid some charges.

Christian heads outside, only to pull Rush outside for a whip into the barricade. Back in and a tilt-a-whirl gutbuster gives Christian two, setting up a roll into a crucifix hold. That’s broken up and Christian misses a charge into the corner, allowing Rush to hit a spear for two. Christian is fine enough to catch him with a kick to the face on top but Rush kicks him down.

A ripcord Spanish fly drops Rush again though and a springboard 450 gives Christian two. Rush is right back with a twisting DDT and the Final Hour gets two more. They go to the apron where Rush can’t hit a German suplex to the floor. Instead they drop down, with Christian hitting a Tombstone. Back in and a 450 double stomp finishes Rush at 12:39.

Rating: B-. Take two guys and let them do their thing for about twelve minutes, which is all you needed to do here. Christian gets the win to keep him strong until he can get his title shot. Gresham being gone is rough to see but having someone like Rush as the backup worked as well as anything else. Good match, but they weren’t about to follow that six man.

We recap Matt Cardona vs. Joey Janela. Cardona married Chelsea Green but Janela faked some pictures of the two of them by a pool together, sending Cardona over the edge. The interesting thing is that Cardona is the huge heel who is mocking all things indy and trying to turn it into WWE. This has been one of the better things going on the independent scene and Cardona has had one awesome stunt after another.

The IF CARDONA WINS WE RIOT sign is a great touch.

Joey Janela vs. Matt Cardona

Chelsea Green is here with Cardona….who comes out to Enter Sandman entrance (or at least a cover), turning the crowd completely upside down in about three seconds. The “IF CARDONA WINS WE RIOT” shirt is an even greater touch. He also has a red flannel shirt with f*** Mick Foley on the back, while Green (with the Internet Title) is in the Zack Ryder half trunks/half tights. Cardona asks what’s up GCW Universe and takes credit for the sellout. Joey Janela didn’t do it, so tonight he’s ending Janela’s career before Tony Khan can fire him.

Cardona jumps him at the bell for two and flips off the fans. The fans get in a “F*** CARDONA/WOO WOO WOO!” chant so Janela hits a Death Valley Driver through the door. The suicide dive takes out Cardona on the floor and it is time for Janela to chair him down. A top rope flip dive sends Janela crashing through the chair though and Cardona gets to chair him down. Green pulls the chair away though and kicks Cardona low for a big surprise.

Janela goes up, only to get crotched by Green because it was a ruse. Cardona shows off the cup he was wearing but Janela is fine enough to hit a superplex to put them both down. Janela grabs the title, but here is Smart Mark Sterling (of AEW fame) to say that if Janela uses the title, he’s disqualified. Commentary: “But it’s GCW!” He brings out someone who is very influential in Cardona’s career, so here is someone in a Vince McMahon mask. It’s Vincent/Virgil though, and the distraction lets Sterling grab Janela.

The belt shot takes Sterling down by mistake though and a Death Valley Driver sends Cardona into the ring frame. Cue Swoggle to post Janela but here is a huge guy named Sam Stackhouse to take Swoggle out. Now it’s Marko Stunt to throw a chair at Swoggle’s head but Cardona takes him down as well. Janela brings in a pair of doors, with Swoggle and Cardona being put through one each.

Green hits Stunt with the belt and gives him a Canadian Destroyer, leaving Cardona to AA Janela through an open chair for a near fall. Cardona loads up two doors, which really does take too long so Janela takes him out. Green’s latest interference earns herself a piledriver so here is a guy in a motorcycle helmet. That would be Brian Myers, who decks Janela and helps Cardona hit a middle rope Radio Silence through the door for the pin at 19:39.

Rating: B-. It was a bit long, but this was a lot of fun with Cardona playing a perfect troll. Cardona knows how to make these people nuts by doing everything they don’t like and now he gets to take out another one of their heroes. The big flaw here is that the match went too long and you could have cut out a good portion in the middle which was more about several other people other than Janela vs. Cardona. This was all about Cardona putting together something else to get people to care about him though, as he continues to be one of the more creative people in wrestling.

Post match Sean Waltman of all people comes in and takes out Cardona before posing with Janela. I’m sold on getting to hear The Kings again.

Here is the injured Mance Warner for a chat. He talks about how awesome GCW’s locker room and entire crew is and thanks the fans for getting them here. Cue Atticus Cougar (pronounced Co-Gar) to say 44OH are the real outlaws around here. Cougar doesn’t like Warner’s Second Gear Crew so Warner is ready to fight.

44OH comes in for the beatdown, with Matthew Justice (Warner’s partner) coming in for the failed save attempt. The lights go off (BECAUSE WRESTLING!) and it’s Bill Alfonso and Sabu making the save. Chairs to the head put 44OH down and we actually get a pin, with Fonzie counting. Pantera’s Walk plays because ECW.

Video on Allie Katch vs. Ruby Soho. Katch talks about divine destiny, meaning that if something is meant to happen, it will happen no matter what. That seems to be the case with this match, as she runs into SOHO painted on a wall. Katch was billed as a big deal during Brett Lauderdale’s pre-show speech so she means something. I don’t remember her being much more than someone who did cat-esque things as Allie Kat but maybe things have changed.

Allie Katch vs. Ruby Soho

They shake hands to start and Soho armdrags her down early on. The threat of the Riott Kick is blocked early on but so is Katch’s piledriver. That’s fine with Allie, who hits a basement dropkick for an early two. Soho is sent into the corner and it’s a running hip attack into a Cannonball for two more.

They trade kicks to the face with Soho getting rocked, only to be able to come back with a German suplex for the double knockdown. Katch takes too long going up top though and gets armdragged back down for a quick two. The Riott Kick connects for two on Katch but she’s right back with a knee into the piledriver for two of her own. With that not working, Katch loads up a super piledriver, which is countered into a Riott Kick from the middle rope to give Soho the pin at 9:31.

Rating: C. I’d hope that Katch can do more than this as it felt like any other match. This came off like a match where a star was making a guest appearance in the territory with the story of the popular star getting a shot. It wasn’t bad, but there was absolutely nothing special to this and it just came and went.

We recap Jeff Jarrett vs. Effy. Jarrett doesn’t like GCW calling themselves outlaws because he is the Last Outlaw. There has to be a huge stable out there of people who have been THE LAST OUTLAW. There have also been guitar shots to show you how serious this has been.

Jeff Jarrett vs. Effy

Effy pulls $20 out of his trunks, which the referee throws to the floor. They go with the basics to start, with Jarrett powering him into the corner. Effy’s spins to get out of a wristlock don’t work so Effy drops to his knee, which freaks Jeff out for a bit. Some shots to the ribs set up a modified Tarantula but Jarrett is back with a clothesline. They head outside with Jarrett whipping him with the belt (which seems to draw a DADDY LIKES IT chant).

Back in and it’s time for more whipping and choking, which seems to make Effy smile. Jarrett uses the belt to tie Effy in the corner, which doesn’t exactly last long. Effy is back with more rights and lefts, setting up a faceplant for two. Now it’s Effy getting to whip away but he misses a Blockbuster. The guitar takes too long for Jarrett though so Effy pulls off his fishnets for some choking. That’s too much for Jarrett, who hits him with the guitar and grabs the Stroke for the pin at 11:15.

Rating: D+. I’ve heard a lot of good things about Effy and I’m going to assume that a lot of it is due to his promos and character work, because he wasn’t doing much in the ring here. All he had was a bunch of punches and a missed Blockbuster, which isn’t exactly stealing the show. That being said, Jarrett winning is a good bit weird, as he is the second outsider in a row to beat a signature GCW name on their biggest night ever. Not a great match, but you can see how much bigger of a star Jarrett is than most of the roster. If nothing else, seeing someone who seems like he knows how to put a match together is almost a rarity around here.

GCW World Title: Homicide vs. Jon Moxley

Homicide is challenging after winning a Rumble last month. The fans chant F*** BULLY RAY to start, which has to make Moxley smile a bit. They forearm/slap it out to start before going face to face. Homicide sends him outside but the dive is cut off with a shot to the face. The fight heads outside with Homicide biting away, only to get sent shoulder first into the post.

Moxley cranks on the fingers and hits a piledriver for two For some reason Moxley goes up but it’s a super cutter to bring him back down. They trade clotheslines until Moxley grabs the Paradigm Shift for two. Moxley hammers away and Homicide seems to lose a tooth. A chair is wedged in the corner but Homicide cuts him off and strikes away. The chair is on the mat and it’s another Paradigm Shift onto said chair to give Moxley two more. Homicide flips him off and bites Moxley’s face, only to get blasted with a lariat. The lifting Paradigm Shift onto the open chair retains Moxley’s title at 11:32.

Rating: C. That’s it? This was so short that I thought I missed part of the match, as I would have bet on it going a good bit longer than Jarrett vs. Effy. Maybe that is the result of ring rust from Moxley, or just time constraints from the pay per view, but this wasn’t exactly great. It worked while it lasted, but it just didn’t last very long.

Video on the Briscoes, who are issuing an open challenge for the Tag Team Titles. Most signs would suggest that this is going to be FTR, but you never know around here.

Tag Team Titles: Briscoes vs. ???/???

The Briscoes are defending against….Nick Gage/Matt Tremont. Well you knew Gage would be on here somehow. Gage puts Nick through the door in the corner to start and it’s time for a duel of the chairs. Mark and Nick trade pieces of door shots to the head but Jay breaks up the pizza cutter. Tremont gets beaten down and the Froggy Bow onto a door gets two on Gage. Back up and Tremont hits a release Rock Bottom to plant Jay and Gage hits a middle rope piledriver on Mark. The chokebreaker gives Gage the pin and the titles at 5:35.

Rating: D. That was a Nick Gage match alright, but this time he had a huge partner to do some really basic stuff too. I know why Gage had to be on the show but it isn’t like his matches are much to see. It’s the feel good moment of the show, though having it come in a five minute match didn’t do the show many favors.

Post match Gage swears a lot and puts over his gang while bragging about how far GCW came. The locker room comes in to celebrate and we’re out.

Overall Rating: D+. One of the shows you are probably going to see this compared to is Barely Legal. While it is nowhere near that important (or good), there is one thing that does stand out. My biggest issue with Barely Legal was the lack of an explanation of why Sabu and Taz hated each other. It was the “Grudge Match of the Century” but we were never told why they were fighting. The ECW fans knew, but Barely Legal wasn’t just a show for the ECW fans.

Now do that for three hours and you have this show. There was barely anything explaining who these people were, what they were doing here, why they were fighting or ANYTHING about them. Cardona vs. Janela had a bit of backstory, but this felt like the game plan was “just keep doing what we’ve been doing (minus the deathmatch stuff, which isn’t their fault)”. It was a show that you either got or didn’t get, with GCW not offering much in the way of guidance.

On top of that, the wrestling was hit and miss at best. Everything felt rushed and very little really stood out. The lucha match was great, but you could get one of those a week on Ring of Honor. Cardona is excellent at riffing on independent wrestling, but then he won, just like Soho over what seems to be the big female star around here. This show didn’t do a thing to make me more interested in GCW and as the big debut on the national stage, it was a pretty hard miss.

 

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




GCW rSpring Break 2021: There’s Something Here

rSpring Break
Date: April 9, 2021
Location: Cuban Club, Tampa, Florida
Commentators: Emil Jay, Kevin Gill

This is arguably the indy weekend main event and the show is hit and miss to say the least. You never know what you are going to see at something like this and that could go multiple ways. I’ve had a good time at these things before, but those were all the Joey Janela versions. Janela is on the card, but his name is no longer on the show. Let’s get to it.

No entrances or anything, as tends to be the case with a show like this.

Dave Penzer is ring announcer. Well that’s an upgrade.

Starboy Charlie vs. Billie Starkz

Charlie just turned 18 and is billed at 145lbs, which commentary says is AFTER he put some size on. Tony Deppen joins commentary because he worked with both of them before and wanted to see the match. Fair enough reason. In your “that’s not normal” stat, Gill says that Billie is closer in age to his four and a half month old son that she is to Gill himself. Feeling out process to start and they go to the mat for the technical off.

Charlie works on a hammerlock but gets leveraged outside without much effort. Back in and Charlie can’t get a Sharpshooter so Billie kicks him in the head. They trade some rollups for two each until Charlie snaps off an armdrag to take over. A dropkick into a standing shooting star press (Deppen: “If I did that, I’d throw my back out.”) gets two on Billie, who blocks the third Amigo.

Billie rolls some German suplexes, giving us the now ultra rare Chris Benoit name drop. Back up and Charlie gets sent into the corner for a kick to the face and an Ocean Cycle suplex (electric chair dropped backwards into something close to a German suplex) gets two. The eternally teased German suplex off the apron continues to be teased but Charlie takes her down in the corner.

The running corkscrew moonsault gets two and Charlie sends her flying with a t-bone suplex. They trade shots to the face for a double knockdown and a breather. Back up again and Charlie suplexes her into the Tree of Woe, setting up the running boot. Billie gets her knees up to block a 450, only to miss a Swanton. They glare at each other a bit until Charlie snaps off a Michinoku Driver (dropping Billie on her head) for the pin at 9:56.

Rating: C. This was action packed but a VERY indy style match. You could feel that they were trying to figure out where to go next after each spot because it didn’t have much of a flow. It was certainly entertaining, but these two need a lot more seasoning (fair enough given their age). That being said, opening a show like this is a good thing for them as the more ring time they get is going to help them out.

Post match 44OH (Bobby Beverly/Eric Ryan) come in for the double beatdown. That means we need a save, and probably a tag match.

44OH vs. Ironbeast

Ironbeast is KTB/Shane Mercer and this feels like a hoss fight. Mercer picks both of them up to start and KTB comes off the top with a high crossbody for the big crash. KTB feeds Beverly back inside for a powerbomb (over the ropes) to plant him down hard. That’s not enough as Only is put on KTB’s shoulders so Mercer can superplex him into the middle. It’s time for the doors but KTB takes too long and gets knocked outside.

Back in and Mercer gets double teamed with forearms to the back and kicks to the face. A tiger driver gets two on KTB but Mercer breaks up the drive through the table. Beverly Cannonballs Mercer against (not through) the table but KTB sends Only through the table without much effort. KTB hits a big dive to take Beverly out on the floor, leaving Mercer to take Only up.

That means a super gorilla press, dropped into a super flipping World’s Strongest Slam (good freaking grief). That’s not it either as KTB adds a powerbomb before throwing Only into a bridging German suplex to give Mercer (ignore his shoulders being down too) for the pin at 6:49.

Rating: C+. Nearly total destruction here, with 44OH (modern names can be really dumb) only getting in a little bit in the middle. Ironbeast is great for a team at this level, as they can do all of their crazy athletic power stuff without giving up much of anything. This was fun and completely different from the opener, which is what you expect on a show like this one.

Penzer says he’s old so Emil Jay can handle the rest of the announcing. Well that’s a downgrade.

Arez/Gringo Loco/Black Taurus vs. Aramis/Dragon Bane/Laredo Kid

Lucha rules of course and yeah I’m going to get lost in a hurry. The latter team comes out to Clint Eastwood by Gorillaz so they can’t be all bad (or they might not be bad at all). Loco drives Laredo into the corner to start and takes him down with a test of strength. Commentary talks about how this could be similar to what used to happen on Monday Nitro as a great introduction to lucha libre. If you’re watching GCW Spring Break, you know lucha libre and probably most of these people.

Loco cartwheels his way out of a headscissors and we get a staredown. A front flip lets Loco flip off his opponents and everyone comes in for the big staredown. Aramis and company snap off a bunch of headscissors to the floor with Arez getting knocked onto Taurus’ shoulders. That’s fine with Kid and Aramais, who hit stereo suicide dives for the double knockdowns.

Back in and a triple 450 has the villains (I think?) in more trouble but Arez scores with three straight tilt-a-whirl backbreakers. Aramis is fine enough to drop Arez onto the turnbuckle but Loco and Taurus are back in to take over with the triple teaming. Kid’s crazy high springboard is speared out of the air and Loco adds a heck of a moonsault for two. Bane’s save doesn’t work either and the triple stomping ensues.

Somehow he’s fine enough to kick Loco in the head and grab a spinning DDT on Taurus for a breather. Taurus isn’t having that and clotheslines a bunch of people but Bane and Aramais save Kid from something on top. That’s fine for the good guys, who hit a crazy stereo triple dive from the top to the floor. Back in and Aramis chops it out with Arez until Bane hits a brainbuster onto the knee.

Taurus kicks Bane in the head and drops him with a torture rack backbreaker, leaving Loco to hit a super Falcon Arrow to plant Aramis. Kid hits back to back moonsaults on Loco but Arez makes the save. A belly to back backbreaker gets two on Kid and it’s a double Old School, until Kid snaps off a springboard hurricanrana to drop Arez because of course they can do that. Loco walks the ropes for a flying cutter, leaving Aramis to hit a poisonrana on Taurus.

Since they haven’t gone insane enough, Loco puts Aramis on his shoulders with Kid on Aramis’ shoulders for a super cutter from Arez, because DANG. Taurus plants Aramis with a pop up Samoan drop and another one plants Bane. Aramis is back up with a very, very, very long spinning torture rack to Bane, which lasts so long that Kid can beat up Loco and go up top for a moonsault frog splash onto Arez and Bane can hit a springboard corkscrew dive onto Taurus. After THIRTY EIGHT SECONDS of spinning, Armais powerbombs Arez for the pin at 13:46.

Rating: B. Yep, what else are you expecting here? These matches are not designed to be anything more than a crazy exchange of spots coming one after another. There is no way to call something like this other than just listing stuff because these matches are not supposed to have any kind of a story. I had a blast with this though as I kept saying “sure why not” because people shouldn’t be able to do this kind of stuff. Awesome fun.

Post match the money is thrown into the ring to keep with tradition.

Joey Janela has sent Jordan Oliver a creepy Lio Rush tape. Then someone slips a note under Oliver’s door with the date of this show written on it.

Jordan Oliver vs. Lio Rush

Oliver is still called Big Breakfast and I still don’t know why. Rush has a very over the top entrance, with some kind of a contortionist moving around a lot to a rather slow song. Then Rush staggers out to what sounds like a rap he is performing himself and is called the Blackheart. The (few) fans are split before the bell and commentary talks about how they’re scared of this version of Rush.

They stare each other down for over a minute before Oliver kicks him out to the floor. Oliver’s suicide cutter drops Rush hard and we need a breather as they both have to get back up. A standing choke doesn’t get Oliver very far as Rush hits him in the face again. Oliver puts him in a chair and gets a running start around the ring, which takes far too long and lets Rush nail a jumping knee to the face. To mix things up, Rush puts him in the chair and hits his own running dive, which actually connects.

Back in and Rush hammers away, including a boot to the face in the corner. An ax kick gives Rush two so let’s bring in a door (which commentary thinks might be FORBIDDEN). Hold on though as Rush needs to stop and yell at a fan, allowing Oliver to strike away. Some kicks to the head rock Oliver but he’s fine enough to suplex Rush hard through the door for two.

It’s time for another door but Oliver takes too long and gets caught with rolling German suplexes. An overhead belly to belly sends Oliver through the door for a slightly delayed two as commentary doesn’t exactly get emotional with these near falls. Back up and the standing C4 cuts off Oliver’s comeback attempt as commentary hypes up Oliver being undefeated in GCW this year.

A superplex to the floor is broken up and a double knockdown puts them outside at the same time. Back in and they go with the big slugout, with commentary bringing up Karate Fighters. Oliver’s tiger driver gets two and a running kick to the face is good for the same. With Rush down, it’s time for more furniture, this time in the form of doors and chairs. Two of the doors are laid over a quartet of chairs at ringside but Rush stares at Oliver to….I guess possess him?

Either way, Oliver forearms him for two with Rush bridging up for the kickout. Rush is right back with some more rolling German suplexes but Oliver rolls through the last one and grabs a German suplex of his own. Oliver sends him to the apron, where Rush (barely) muscles him over for the Falcon Arrow outside through the doors. Back in and Rush takes WAY too long to set up a frog splash (Oliver was half sitting up) and dives into a cutter.

A springboard cutter gets a very close two on Rush and we get the big shocked face. Another cutter (without much impact) drops Rush onto the apron and they’re both down on the floor again. That’s only good for two back inside with Rush bridging up for the kickout again. Oliver loads up a super cutter but gets shoved off, allowing Rush to nail the frog splash. Something close to a Gargano Escape makes Oliver tap at 22:24.

Rating: B-. This was a very indy style big match, with the tables and a bunch of different versions of the same move. Rush is a bigger star, but Oliver has gotten a lot out of this whole weekend. Given that this loss makes him 3-1 on the day, it is pretty clear that he is putting in the ring time to get a good deal of experience. He is a long way from being signed by a big promotion, but this kind of match will get him some needed notice.

Atticus Cougar (great name, though apparently it is pronounced “Co-Gar”) talks about being a Masada fan since he was a kid and now he’s facing Masada in a death (erg) match. This match has been one of his top priorities and now it is time to prove himself. At some point, Cougar used Masada’s signature skewers on Masada’s head, which seems to be an act of war.

Atticus Cougar vs. Masada

Death match with commentary promising a lot of violence. There are weapons, including barbed wire, all around the ring to start. The brawl is on to start with Masada sending Cougar into a skewer board in the corner. Masada finds a piece of a broken door but Cougar kicks him in the face to break it up. A suicide dive is countered into a belly to back drop onto the apron and Masda doors him. Part of the door is raked over Cougar’s head but he is right back with some kendo stick shots.

Masada is back with a bed of toothpicks, which he puts on Cougar’s back and pounds it in. Said board is raked over Cougar’s head to draw the blood and then pulls some toothpicks out of his back. Something that looks like a kendo stick to the head knocks Cougar down again and it’s time for the skewers to the head. Cougar manages to dropkick him into a skewer covered board in the corner, some of which are then pounded into Masada’s head.

They fight outside where Masada can’t hit a powerbomb so Cougar gets in a shot to the face. Back in and the door is set onto two chairs, but first Cougar stabs him in the shoulder with the skewers. Masada is back with some mini skewers into Cougar’s head (where they stick) and now the powerbomb through the door gets two. The skewers go into Cougar’s mouth for another stomping and that means it’s time for a breather (and skewer removal) on the floor. A few fans try an ULTRAVIOLENCE chant as both guys stand around for a bit.

Back in and Masada grabs a powerbomb into the STF but Cougar uses a piece of wood to the hand to break it up. Cougar’s top rope double stomp gives him his own two so he puts Masada on a chair. It takes too long for him to go up top though and Masada is right there, only to get caught with a super headlock driver onto a chair. Say it with me: for two.

Cougar whips out a board with a gusset plate attached but Masada takes it away and hits him in the arm. A Death Valley Driver gets two and Masada drives said plate into the arm. Cougar hits him low and puts more skewers into the head, setting up the headlock driver to drive the skewers even further in, again, for two. A low superkick sets up a third headlock driver to finally finish Masada at 18:40.

Rating: D-. Somehow, this featured more wrestling than usual in these matches, though that didn’t exactly make it better. This was more mindless carnage and violence with all of the blood they could manage, but they used the skewers so it was awesome (allegedly). As usual, they weren’t exactly building to anything here and kept repeating the same weapons over and over. Yeah they used skewers earlier, but now they’re using them AGAIN! More nonsense and thankfully we get to move on.

Rich Swann vs. Lee Moriarty

Ok this could be good. Swann’s entrance has the fans dancing for a cool visual, with commentary talking about how wrestling brings people together and Twitter tears them apart. I guess we’re to ignore him asking fans to get the show trending on Twitter before the match. Moriarty comes in with taped up ribs and they go technical to start, including an exchange of armdrags.

Both of them try dropkicks at the same time and it’s an early standoff. They trade some flips until Swann hits the dropkick to take over for the first time. An armbar brings Moriarty back to his feet and he grabs a Codebreaker onto the arm. Swann needs a breather on the floor so Moriarty goes after him to sent the arm into various things. Back in and the arm is sent into the corner as commentary talks about the (pretty good) For The Culture show late last night.

Swann grabs a neckbreaker for a breather and the rolling splash gets two. Moriarty is right back on the arm and snaps off a heck of a DDT for two of his own. A double underhook tiger driver drops Swann again but he’s back up with a one armed handspring cutter for a very near fall. The frog splash gets two more so it’s time for the big slugout.

An exchange of kicks to the head puts both of them down and the fans are pleased. They go to a pinfall reversal sequence for multiple two’s each until Moriarty grabs a Fujiwara armbar. That’s broken up as well so Moriarty keeps hold of the arm and nails a lariat for another two. Moriarty takes him up top, where Swann bites the bad ribs (that’s a new one) to take him back down. The 450 finishes for Swann at 12:14.

Rating: B-. Oh sure, these two can only get twelve minutes while a fight over skewers to the head gets nearly twenty. Swann winning is completely fine, though Moriarty continues to be one of the real stars of the weekend. He is going to get a good chance somewhere in the future and matches like this one are only going to make it happen faster.

Chris Dickinson talks about how Joey Janela has been living off of his reputation for years now. He isn’t going to stand for Janela turning wrestling into a circus and now it is time to knock some sense into Janela. The snake’s head is coming off and Janela better come ready to go. Dickinson loves him though.

Chris Dickinson vs. Joey Janela

Janela is in Bam Bam Bigelow inspired gear and they go straight at it with the slugout. Dickinson grabs a powerbomb and then throws in a second to make it worse. Commentary recaps the feud here: they were stablemates and Janela agreed to put up the naming rights for the show for a World Title shot, where Dickinson turned on him, presumably for being too goofy. I’ve heard worse ideas. Dickinson throws in a door, which he breaks in some smaller pieces to go after Janela’s head.

With Janela busted open, Dickinson drives the wood into his head even more, as a proper monster should. The rest of the door goes onto Janela’s head and a running basement dropkick drives the door into him again. A half nelson suplex plants Janela for two so Dickinson takes him up top. It’s desperation time though and Janela grabs a top rope superplex for the much needed breather. Janela stomps away in the corner but Dickinson is back with some hard rolling German suplexes.

Somehow Janela pops back up with a roaring elbow for two of his own, setting up a broken door over the head. Dickinson suplexes him down again as commentary talks about Dickinson getting annoyed at putting in the effort while Janela gets everything handed to him. Dickinson heads outside and asks for a chair so the fans throw in a few dozen, with commentary being VERY against this, as they should be.

A chair to the head in the corner rocks Janela but he comes back with a superkick and DDT (yep, it’s an indy match). Dickinson clotheslines the heck out of him and they’re both down for a double breather. They head up top again, with Janela fighting out of another superplex attempt and hits a tornado DDT onto the pile of chairs. Dickinson rolls outside though, as this needs to keep going. A suicide dive sends the now bleeding Dickinson down again (Commentary: “Dickinson is F*****!”) and a top rope double stomp onto the chest gives Janela two back inside.

Janela blasts him in the head with a chair but Dickinson wants more. The delay lets Dickinson go low, setting up Death Valley Driver onto a chair for one (of course). They slug it out until Janela grabs his own Death Valley Driver for two. Dickinson catches him on top with a super Razor’s Edge toss for two more. Therefore, let’s bring in a ladder and a door, though Dickinson is smart enough to pause for a running boot to Janela’s head.

The really big ladder is set up in the corner and Dickinson bridges the door over four chairs. Janela comes back with a low blow and chair shot before climbing up. Dickinson meets him on top though and it’s a super Death Valley Driver through the door, say it with me, for two. The fans chant for JOEY KICKOUT as Dickinson is favoring his knee. The knee is good enough for some dragon screw legwhips to drop Janela, who shrugs it off to grab a Figure Four. Dickinson almost turns it over but finally taps at 21:57.

Rating: C. It was violent (with the blood thankfully only being a focus at the beginning) and it did tell a story of Janela fighting back against the powerhouse, but EGADS the kickouts were insane. That seems to be Janela’s thing and it works with this audience, though that doesn’t quite make it the easiest thing to watch. The action and high spots were good, but the eye rolling over the kickouts brought it right back down, as tends to be the case with these matches.

Post match Dickinson pulls himself up so Janela offers a handshake, only to have Dickinson spit in his hands and walk away. Janela says he’s back in GCW and gets a rather limited reaction. Some of the fans do seem to like him though, with commentary saying it means the internet doesn’t matter. They then tell us to go get GCW merch online.

Effy vs. Gregory Iron

Iron is a wrestler with cerebral palsy and has Virgil of all people (you knew he would pop up somewhere) with him. Ring announcer: “Being accompanied to the ring by……VIRGIL???”. Iron gives Virgil a big introduction, dubbing him a Spring Break Hall of Famer and the newest member of 44OH. This is billed as Brunch vs. B****, with Effy putting up the naming rights to his Big Gay Brunch (the actual title). Effy’s entrance lets commentary talk about how little Effy cares about what anyone thinks of him and how he is for everyone. He gets in Virgil’s face to start but Virgil has a bottle of vodka.

The distraction lets Iron get in some chair shots to take over in a hurry as commentary wonders how Virgil got that bottle (which is apparently for drinking, not product placement). Effy comes back with some chops in the corner as commentary wonders what Iron would serve at his brunch. Iron is back with a Thesz press and shots to the face as we talk about Iron appearing on Steve Austin’s podcast.

Something like a reverse Fameasser out of the corner gives Effy two, which has Virgil fairly disinterested (as he stands on the apron instead of the floor). A Codebreaker gets Iron out of trouble but Effy grabs a sunset flip and pulls Iron’s trunks down in the process. There’s a backsplash for two on Iron, whose trunks are still down so Effy gives it some spanks.

Virgil comes in for a distraction so Iron can get in a low blow, only to have Virgil hit him in the head with the vodka bottle by mistake (with Virgil flinching before hitting him to make it look pretty awful). Hold on though as Effy grabs some scissors to cut off Virgil’s 44OH shirt to reveal an Effy shirt. The fans are pleased as Iron (still with the trunks down) gets powerbombed for the pin at 5:59.

Rating: D+. I’m not sure how much drama there was here and the match was more about comedy with some action thrown in. Effy seems to be a fan favorite and Iron seems to be quite the nasty heel, so the story worked out well enough. The problem is that it wasn’t very good and felt like a low level TV main event more than anything else. Granted I can appreciate that as we are almost at three hours on this show.

Post match Effy pulls Iron’s trunks back up, making him even more of a face.

A scafflold has to be built for the main event so here are some commercials.

Video on Rickey Shane Page vs. Nick Gage, with Page saying he came here, stole Gage’s manhood and title, so now it’s time to do it one more time.

We pause for a good while to put up enough light tubes to make half of a cage.

GCW World Title: Rickey Shane Page vs. Nick Gage

Page (apparently the leader of 44OH) is defending and it’s a deathmatch with nearly an hour to go in the show (oh boy). The entrances take the better part of ever as commentary REALLY hypes up the war between Gage and 44OH. Gage gets his Big Match Intro and then jumps Page with a light tube during his own, because Gage isn’t that nice. Page is whipped into a wall of light tubes and it’s time for Gage to stab him in the back with a piece of broken tube.

Another whip into the corner sends Page through a sheet of glass and Gage shrugs off a whip into tubes. The Facewash into the light tubes hits Page in the corner as Page is already busted badly. Gage can’t quite get out of the ring but eventually manages a springboard backsplash to drive him through a barbed wire/glass board. Some fans hold up chairs so Gage can send him face first into them as commentary talks about the glory that is Nick Gage. Page is finally able to score with a light tube of his own (my goodness it feels dumb to say things like this) and it’s time to gouge Gage’s forehead.

That’s a bit more than Gage is willing to sell though and Page is whipped through another glass panel. Back in and another light tube goes over Page’s head and Gage does it again for good measure. Gage gets whipped hard into the other wall of light tubes and Page breaks another one over Gage’s face. A comeback is countered with a backdrop over the top and through another sheet of glass, with Gage nearly landing on his head.

Page starts going after Gage’s injured ankle (which has been a problem for months) before taking him to the apron for a toss suplex through a bed of light tubes. That’s only good for two back inside, because it’s only been about 50 light tubes so far. Gage is a bit blinded from….well everything really, and hits the referee by mistake (BECAUSE A REFEREE MATTERS SO MUCH IN THIS THING) setting up a DDT and spinebuster. Another light tube connects with Page’s head and then Gage uses a jagged piece of tube to start carving MDK into Page’s back.

Page climbs the scaffold and here is Gregory Iron to slow Gage down. That earns him a piledriver onto various pieces of glass as Effy comes out to take care of Iron. Cue more 44OH members to go after Gage, with Page directing traffic while down on the scaffold. A table is loaded up and here’s a big package of light tubes wrapped around whatever is inside the thing.

44OH takes forever to load up more glass so here are Joey Janela and some more guys (to Walk by Pantera, making me think that that we were getting a Rob Van Dam cameo) to even things up. Gage gets up and points at Page on top of the scaffold, with Gage following (as we hear a production worker talking about having Gage’s music ready).

Page is tossed through the glass and most of the tubes, completely missing the table they are on. The rest of the tubs are smashed over Page’s back as we have a new referee. Gage finishes carving the M into Page’s back but gets hit low, setting up a chokebreaker for two. The referee gets a chokebreaker as well so here is Atticus Cougar to load up ANOTHER sheet of glass over some chairs.

Some skewers go into Gage’s head and now it’s time to put more chairs and another sheet of glass onto the first sheet of glass. Cue promoter Brett Lauderdale to hit Cougar with some tubes, allowing Gage to powerbomb himself through the two sheets (with Page landing on the mat and Gage going through everything) for two. A chokebreaker gives Gage the title back at 24:37.

Rating: D-. Ignoring the rather sickening worship of Gage by commentary, the insane blood, all of the interference and the ridiculous amount of missed spots, this was full of a lot of the same problems you often have from a deathmatch: it was so repetitive that none of it had any impact. See, they used a light tube, but then they used like A HUNDRED light tubes. They put him through a sheet of glass? Well how awesome would it be if they did it five times??? This was a big story for this audience, but dang these things are not for me and the actual content of the matches is one of the least problems.

Post match Lauderdale hands Gage some spray paint so he can paint MDK on the old belt (which had been painted by Page). Hold on though as some music plays and we have Jon Moxley for the big staredown with Gage. They go nose to nose, with some of Gage’s blood getting on Moxley’s face. Moxley goes to leave but Gage shouts some expletives and now the fight is on (like Donkey Kong, according to commentary).

Moxley lays him out with the Paradigm Shift and then hits another onto the light tubes. Gage is down so Moxley gets to pose a lot and leaves, with Gage popping back up because he doesn’t stay down. Gage asks where his motherf****** gang is and calls Moxley a variety of bad names. He thanks the fans for having his back and worrying about him while he was out with an injury.

What matters is that he is the best deathmatch wrestler in the world and he and Moxley will have a REAL deathmatch. Everything around here is real and none of these weapons are fake so we’ll see who is really tough. Gage hits the catchphrase, wants one of his friends let out of prison, and hits the catchphrase again to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. The thing that needs to be understood here is that there are a lot of good matches on here. A lot of this stuff had nothing to do with the violence or the hardcore and was just about having some solid action. They had a good mixture of action with various kinds of wrestling and a lot of it is watchable at best and very entertaining at worst.

Then you have the deathmatch stuff and simply put, you’re either into it or you’re not and there isn’t much of a middle ground. One thing that does help is that (possible quality aside), there is certainly a main story going on through GCW, with 44OH seemingly feuding with most of the promotion. That’s fine for a story to have going on and it does seem like the deathmatches were set up, but they’re absolutely not my thing and it brings the rest of the show down. If you’re into some rather watchable indy stuff, this is absolutely worth a look, but you might want to have the fast forward ready for two of the longer matches.

 

 

 

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Party Hard Wrestling Partymania III: Turn Out The Lights

IMG Credit: Party Hard Wrestling

Partymania III
Date: January 25, 2019
Location: The Nile, Mesa, Arizona

So here’s one you’ve probably never heard of, though somehow it’s the second show I’ve done from this same venue this year. This is from Party Hard Wrestling, which is one of the roughly 438 indy promotions with shows available on Independentwrestling.TV. I got a twenty day free trial so I thought I’d try some very random ones and see what they had. Let’s get to it.

Believe it or not, I have no idea what to expect, what’s going on or who these people are.

Opening sequence, with a song saying I WANT TO PARTY WITH YOU over and over.

Pizza Party Battle Royal

Jody Summers, Gourdin, Bradley Banister, Lucha Starr, Tank Engine Thomas, Macho Mouse, Thugnificent, Josh Carey, Ana May, Pete The Heat, Esgrima Gomez, JB2

It’s a battle royal but after each person is eliminated, they go to a table and get a pizza box containing further instructions. The prize to the winner: a golden fanny pack. Well what else were you expecting? As is the case with most low level indies, I can barely understand the entrances (thank goodness for lists of wrestlers on the title screen). There are a lot of masked men in this and I’m not sure which is which, save for some quick words from the announcer when he comes in clearly enough.

Thugnificent has a title on a chain around his neck. Gomez is in fencing gear for some reason and JB2 is Slater from Saved By The Bell, down to being billed from Bayside. And….there is no commentary on this show so I’m going to be even more lost than usual. Everyone gangs up on Thomas (the biggest guy in the match) to get rid of him, meaning we can get to the traditional fighting on the ropes.

Hang on though as Thomas’ further instructions are to GO BACK IN. Thomas: “THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID!” Thugnificent grabs May (the only woman in the match) by the hair and tells her to say something else. Instead she hits him in the face as the regular battle royal brawling goes on around them. May punches Thugnificent out, with him shouting that she is on steroids. Hang on though as Thugnificent’s box also says go back in. We could be here for a long time at this rate.

Thugnificent gets put out again and I’m assuming this one is for good. Macho Mouse is tossed with Ana following him a few seconds later. Gourdin is out and Ana’s pizza box says she’s out. Gomez is tossed and both his and Gourdin’s boxes say they’re out. Summers and Banister are out but both get to go back in, as does Starr. Carey is tossed and he’s out for good. JB2 gets tossed with Banister following him out, as I’m trying as hard as I can to keep track of who is left.

Pete is out as JB2 is back in and Thomas eliminates Gomez, leaving us with Thomas, JB2 and Summers (I think that’s it at least.). All boxes have been delivered so it’s now just a regular battle royal. Thomas tosses JB2 and the rather tall Summers’ forearms have no effect. Naturally he leverages Thomas out a few seconds later for the win at 10:06.

Rating: D. Oh I’m in for a long one here. The camera work is a near nightmare as everything seems to be filmed on a handheld camera with nothing but closeups for the whole match. The lack of commentary isn’t helping either as I could barely keep track of who was in and who was going back in. This might have worked with a lot more structure, but what we had was so all over the place that it didn’t work.

Summers can’t believe he won and JB2 celebrates with him.

EJ Sparks vs. Spyder

EJ dances to the ring and seems to be the fun character. Spyder, with some weird triangle shaped sunglasses that he’ll be wrestling in, jumps him before the bell. The fans respond with a HEY! WE WANT SOME EJ chants as Spyder kicks him in the back. They get inside for the opening bell and EJ hits a jumping middle rope kick to the ribs to take over. The referee wants things to settle down and Spyder hits a Backstabber.

An uppercut to the back gets two and you can hear what sounds like a three year old with the WE WANT SOME EJ chant for a rather adorable moment. Spyder’s suplex gets two and he yells at the referee before hitting a running basement dropkick in the corner. Spyder says it’s time to go to sleep but EJ hits a jumping enziguri. A belly to back faceplant gets two but Spyder grabs the referee to get in a low blow. Spyder Rolls the Dice for the pin at 5:42.

Rating: D+. Neither of these two were even somewhat impressive as the only thing that stood out was Spyder’s glasses. Sparks seems fine for a fun character and the fans like him but it’s not like he’s doing anything that hasn’t been done better elsewhere. Spyder can swear a lot but neither of them were impressive in the ring. This show isn’t getting off to a good start and I don’t think I see it getting better.

Lethal Injection vs. Arrow Club vs. Team AF vs. Lunar Patrol

Elimination rules for the #1 contendership to the Tag Team Titles. This show really doesn’t need another multi person match right now. Since the audio isn’t great, I have no idea what their individual names are and it’s going to be hard enough to remember which team is which. Lethal Injection seem to be the only heels here. Since there are no individual names, we’ll go with Lethal 1 and AF 1 start things off, with AF 1 dancing a lot and giving Lethal 1 a quick spank.

After a lot of dancing, Lethal 1 grabs a wristlock but gets pulled into a waistlock for more dancing. Let’s do a quick summary of the next few seconds: headlock, dancing, shoulder, dancing, hiptoss, dancing, more dancing, neckbreaker, two. It’s off to AF 2 vs. the male member of the Lunar Patrol, the latter of whom seems to be wrestling at half speed. I’m not sure if it’s intentional and supposed to tie into the different gravity on the moon, but it’s really annoying.

Arrow 1 (the woman) and the female Patrol comes in with Arrow 1 grabbing a quick bearhug. That’s broken up so Lunar woman hits a headscissors. Lethal 2 tags himself in and shoves Arrow 1, who shoves him right back. AF 1 finds this HILARIOUS and it’s off to Arrow 2, who loudly shouts to suck his tomahawk. That earns him a hard chop but he’s right back with an even harder one, followed by a double hand chop for good measure. This is HIS reservation you see, though Lethal has some reservations about that and clotheslines him to the floor.

Almost everyone gets sent outside and AF 1 hits a suicide dive. Lunar 2 dives off the top onto everyone as well, leaving AF 2 to load up a dive of his own. Lethal Force double elbows him down though and we settle back into a regular (as regular as a four way can be) structure. A double back elbow sets up an assisted splash for two but AF 2 jawbreaks his way to freedom. Arrow 1 comes in off the hot tag but gets dropped with a double Regal Cutter.

The Lethals stop to flip off the crowd, allowing Arrow 1 to suplex both of them down. Lunar Patrol comes in and sends the Lethals into each other, setting up the female Luna with a rollup to get rid of them at 12:44. The Arrows hit a Russian legsweep/big boot combination for two on the female Lunar with the male Lunar making the save. That just gets him stomped down into the corner but the Lunars double bulldog Arrow 1 for two.

The Lunars get the Arrows into quickly broken stereo Rings of Saturn….as the female Lunar seems to go into a fit in the corner. She shouts that IT WON’T STOP as the Arrows launch the male Lunar into a German suplex for the double pin at 15:15. We’re down to AF vs. Arrow Club for the title shot, with the female Lunar screaming as she leaves. She yells at her partner and stomps him before leaving on her own as we seem to have a bit of insanity.

AF 2 and Arrow 1 slug it out with Arrow’s delayed vertical suplex being broken up with a knee to the head. Arrow 2 comes in for a wheelbarrow suplex into a cutter, followed by a spinning powerbomb for two. It’s off to AF 1 for some superkicks though, setting up a pumphandle powerslam on Arrow 2. AF hits a top rope splash for the pin and the title shot at 18:08.

Rating: C. Match of the night here, despite having no idea who any of these people were. The teams had unique enough gimmicks but they didn’t exactly do anything to make them stand out, save for the cringe inducing tomahawk line. The wrestling was nothing that hadn’t been done better before, but given the circumstances, this was perfectly watchable and didn’t feel long.

We go to the female Lunar’s apartment where the male Lunar comes in to check on her. She screams at him that they keep losing and it’s all his fault as the screen cuts to black. Could be interesting.

LJ Ramos vs. Starlos

Falls Count Anywhere. Ramos (who thankfully has an LJ hat on) comes to the ring in a half clown mask. Starlos is a bit bigger (with 305 on his vest) and the fight starts on the floor in a hurry, as should be the case in a gimmick match like this. They fight over by the merch tables and bar with Starlos stopping for a drink. I believe we get the opening bell as the fans want to know where the referee is. Did anyone check the bar?

Starlos throws him into and then hits him with some chairs before it’s into the ring for the first time. Ramos gets in a few right hands but Starlos crushes him with a splash. The near fall is enough for Starlos to yell at the referee for not being out in the crowd earlier. Some more right hands gives Ramos two as the pace slows down a lot. A running hip attack in the corner hits Starlos and it’s time to go outside again.

Starlos gets posted but avoids a chair shot, only to have Ramos slug away back inside. A sitout powerbomb gets two and a slam Starlos slams him onto a chair. The big elbow only hits chair though and Ramos grabs a double arm DDT onto the chair for a big crash. Ramos can’t cover though and Starlos rolls outside to save himself. With the chair not working, Ramos grabs a bat, only to get a chair pelted at his head. Cue Tank Engine Thomas to beat Starlos down though and a bat shot to the head gives Ramos the pin at 10:41.

Rating: D. I wasn’t feeling this one as it was a low motion fight with the Falls Count Anywhere part not adding much. It would have been fine as a street fight perhaps but I was expecting more from the gimmick. This is also a situation where commentary would have helped as we could have heard why Thomas interfered. I don’t know if it was expected or a surprise and that takes away whatever impact it could have had.

Tag Team Titles: Johnny Savoi/??? vs. Uninvited

The Uninvited (Oliver Grimsley Alex something I can’t make out) are challenging and Alex spits beer in Savoi’s face during the entrances. Savoi doesn’t have a partner to start so the beatdown is on with one VERY excited Alex fan cheering him on. They get inside for the opening bell and it’s a Backstabber into a Codebreaker for a double one finger cover. Cue someone named Jack Jameson to I’LL MAKE A MAN OUT OF YOU from Mulan, making him the most awesome thing on the show so far.

Jameson cleans house and we even go old school with a double noggin knocker. Savoi is back up as well and posts Alex as Jameson works on a wristlock inside. We settle down to Savoi dropping an elbow for two on Grimsley but it’s quickly off to Alex. That means Savoi’s fingers are bent backwards and Grimsley’s elbow to the back of the head gets two. An enziguri hits Grimsley and a Falcon Arrow gives Savoi two of his own.

Jameson shouts for a tag, even giving Savoi some directions to get to the corner. It’s better than most places you try to get to. The tag goes through but the referee doesn’t see it for one of the classic tag tropes. Alex is right back in with the stomping and the suplex gets two. Like a true heel, Alex reaches Johnny’s hand over for a tag to taunt Jameson rather well. A bit too much trash talking (“Get up you Instagram w****!”) lets Johnny get in a right hand but Alex knocks him right back down.

Alex even yells at the referee in the corner but the power of rhythmic clapping starts Johnny’s comeback. An enziguri drops Alex but Grimsley is back in to knock Jack off the apron just in time. Another enziguri is enough for the hot tag to Jameson and house is cleaned in a hurry. Alex offers a quick low bridge though and it’s Jameson in trouble again. They must have a thing against face comebacks.

Jameson slugs away at Alex until it’s a quick tag off to Grimsley. Savoi low bridges Alex to the floor though and Jameson small packages Grimsley to retain out of nowhere at 12:10. The announcer isn’t sure if that means new champions or the champions retain but Savoi came in with a belt so we’ll say retaining.

Rating: C+. This was more like it as the company seems to be better at tag matches than singles. They told a story here with Savoi needing help and Jameson coming to his rescue, though the very sudden ending wasn’t the best thing they could have done. I’ve seen Grimsley before and he can do more than he did here. Alex was good at cutting off the ring and yelling here and he made me want to see the champs make a comeback. Rather nice match here, at least on a sliding scale.

Post match Alex yells at Grimsley for spending too much time painting his face and the brawl is on. Cue Ramos and Thomas to beat Grimsley down though and a lot of screaming ensues. Alex calls Grimsley selfish and lays him out with a quiet right hand. Grimsley is OFFICIALLY uninvited.

The trio leaves and Grimsley grabs the mic, saying that Alex isn’t Han Solo so he isn’t shooting first. He compares Thomas to Chewbacca and LJ to “Little Jar Jar” and the fans aren’t impressed. Grimsley started the Uninvited and promises to succeed without them. Where was Alex while Grimsley was fighting 2 Cold Scorpio and Adam Cole? Next month he wants Alex in a Loser Leaves Town match with the loser being permanently UNINVITED. The Star Wars stuff was horrible but he picked it up at the end.

Chairizona State Title: Ray Basura vs. Zicky Dice

Basura is defending and has an entourage including two masked men. He also wears a crown and looks like he’s the king of trash (which is what Rey Basura would mean in Spanish) so it’s certainly a unique gimmick. Zicky on the other hand is introduced as the Best Midcard Wrestler In The World. Indeed Basura is billed as the Trash King and I’m oddly fascinated by this guy. He’s even covered in dirt and mud for a nice bonus.

Basura gives him a chance to bow instead of fight but Dice invites him to his crotch. The forearms to Dice’s head start things off as the bespectacled (awesome word) referee can’t handle the stench from Basura. Dice pulls…..some tape out of his mouth? I think? Either way he knocks Basura outside and flip dives onto everyone. They fight up the merch area with Basura slamming him on the floor but Dice gets in a trashcan shot. Shouldn’t that make Basura feel better?

The trashcan goes over Basura’s head and gets hit with a chair as a fan shouts that this is No DQ. I mean, maybe that comes with the CHAIRizona part of the title but they might want to clarify things. Back in and Basura chokes on the ropes and hits some alternating back elbows in the corner. A missed charge lets Zicky get two off a German suplex but Basura gives him a slingshot wheelbarrow suplex for two of his own.

Dice is right back with a bridging northern lights suplex for two more. I never would have guessed that the King of Trash vs. a guy named Zicky Dice would turn into an exchange of suplexes but wrestling can surprise you that way. A powerslam gives Basura another two but he gets caught on top for a superplex.

The minions come in so Dice deals with them in a hurry, sending Basura into the corner to crush them. A triple Cannonball gets two on Basura but he rakes the eyes to slow Dice down. Basura’s chokeslam is broken up (Fan: “YOU AIN’T UNDERTAKER!”) and Zicky plants him for two. Zicky heads up top but gets shoved off by a minion, allowing Basura to hit White Noise to retain at 10:17.

Rating: C-. The gimmicks helped this a lot as Basura is a heck of a unique character and Dice has enough charisma to carry up the fact that he’s overweight and has a rather terrible look. That’s the kind of thing I love to get from a promotion like this as where else can you find a guy named TRASH KING? There’s something cool about that and it’s kind of awesome to see.

Post match the minions crown Basura again.

Mikey vs. Effy vs. Suede Thompson

Dang it with the multi person matches. Mikey runs around the ring and dives into some fans’ arms during his entrance. The fans seem split between Mikey and Suede (who I think I’ve seen before) here and it takes some time to get to the bell. Mikey bails to the floor to get a kiss on the cheek from a fan so Suede goes outside to get one of his own.

Effy goes outside to get is own, but instead pulls a dollar out of his trunks and tells the woman to go get him a Diet Coke. She puts the dollar back in the trunks but Suede shouts that we’re starting. Hold on again though as Suede goes outside and steals a fan’s Smoking Skull Title. That’s going to be on the line and the referee even holds it up….so we can have a second bell. There was no contact in the first three minutes so why not.

Smoking Skull Title: Mikey vs. Effy vs. Suede Thompson

The title is vacant coming in….I guess? It’s a three way test of strength to start, which is the first contact between any of them. That’s broken up and Suede kisses Effy to freak him out. Suede: “Is there a problem?” Mikey and Effy kick him in the ribs and tell him that they respect kisses before kissing him on the cheek. It’s a triple knockdown but none of them can do a nip up, at least not without the referee’s help.

Effy demands that Mikey chop him as hard as he can so Mikey obliges as Suede chills on the floor. Mikey hammers away in the corner and offers a spank when Effy tries a headscissors out of the corner. The referee gets headscissored instead, with Effy’s crotch rubbing against his face for a long time. Suede is back in for the big exchange of rollups and a bunch of near falls. Then the referee gets rolled up for two, with Suede getting two and thinking he won for some reason.

We take an informal crowd poll to determine if it was two or three as this is going WAY too long. Mikey finally starts punching the two of them but misses a top rope splash which took a long time to set up. The fans keep calling Effy “daddy” as he suplexes Mikey for two. Suede is back up with a clothesline for each of them before putting Mikey on top for some back raking. The referee says you can’t do that and it turns into the Thriller Dance as he explains what can’t be done.

In the next convoluted spot, Mikey gets tied in the Tree of Woe with Effy pulling Suede from the floor, meaning their faces wind up in each others’ crotches. Effy’s belly to back gets two on Mikey and a Rough Ryder gets the same on Suede. Mikey goes up top with Effy in front of him, so Suede runs at the corner and climbs onto Effy’s back for a superplex.

It’s Effy back up with a Fameasser for two on Mikey and a reverse Fameasser out of the corner gets the same on Suede. Good grief just END THIS THING already! Suede hits a hanging piledriver on Effy but gets small packaged by Mikey for the pin at 11:00 (or 14:01 if you count the first part).

Rating: D-. This was the kind of match where they might as well have had a big sign over their heads that said COMEDY in bright letters. It was funny in small doses but it went on far too long and just wasn’t funny for the most part. You can do comedy in certain doses but “HAHA THAT LOOKED GAY” gets old in a hurry. It was comedy but not good comedy, which is often a really bad idea, like it was here.

Party Hard Multiverse Title: Shane Marvel vs. Party Ranger

Marvel is defending and the Ranger is in a knockoff Power Ranger costume. Ranger tries to do a standing backflip during the Big Match Intros but Marvel jumps him from behind and the fight is on in a hurry. A dropkick puts Marvel on the floor and that means a big flip dive. Ranger hits a spinning kick to the head and they head back inside but Marvel rolls back outside to avoid a dive.

Therefore, Ranger flips over the top to take him down again as Marvel doesn’t seem too bright. Ranger has a bunch of fans clear out of their chairs so he can throw Marvel through them. Now that’s just being messy dude. A running shooting star off the balcony makes some glancing contact as the fans chant PARTY HARD. Back in and Marvel kicks the leg out, meaning the target is acquired.

That means some kicks to the leg and a leglock, with Marvel telling a fan to shut their f’ing mouth. Fan: “DON’T YOU TALK TO ME LIKE THAT!” The leg gets crushed on the ropes but Ranger uses the good leg to hit an enziguri. Marvel is right back up and starts tearing at Ranger’s gear (dude that’s probably not cheap), including the mask. A shinbreaker takes Ranger right back down for two and it’s more of the gear being ripped up. With the leg stuff played out, Marvel takes him up top for the superplex and a double knockdown. That one crash, the lesser of the two, shouldn’t get them this close to even.

The mask is torn as Ranger wins a slugout and hits a German suplex. A Pele connects and it’s an ax handle to give Ranger two. What looks to be a reverse fisherman’s buster, the Party Foul, doesn’t work as the knee gives out so Ranger hits him in the face instead. Marvel is back up with a running White Noise for two and a neckbreaker for some trash talking.

Ranger slips out of a curb stomp attempt and sends Marvel into the corner. A shooting star press takes WAY too long to set up (with Marvel nearly standing up before it even launches) and Marvel catches it in a cutter for two. The curb stomp gets the same and the yelling at the referee lets Ranger get his own two off a rollup. Marvel goes right back to the knee though and another curb stomp retains the title at 16:17.

Rating: C+. I got into this one a lot more than I was expecting to as Marvel is a bigger (taller, not overweight) guy and played well against the smaller Ranger. Marvel isn’t a great heel or anything but he played his role here and made the match work. The ripping up different parts of the costume was a change of pace too as everyone goes for the mask most of the time. Good match here and it felt like a bigger deal.

Post match Marvel takes the mask as a trophy. Marvel grabs the mic and tells us to come to the pancake breakfast tomorrow when he massacres someone else. He doesn’t like people who like pancakes so he’ll destroy Mikey tomorrow. That sounds like a train wreck.

We see some clips of the pancake breakfast and…..yeah I’m good.

Overall Rating: D+. This was a VERY indy show and you have to keep something like that in mind for such a show. It’s not the worst I’ve ever seen or really close to it, but the lack of commentary and characters who only stand out at times made it a pretty long watch. The party aspect was rather light here too and the name didn’t do the show much good. This wasn’t a terrible show, but it’s nothing I’m going to want to come back to later.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

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