Rampage – August 12, 2022: Nope, Try Again

Rampage
Date: August 12, 2022
Location: Target Center, Minneapolis, Minnesota
Commentators: Jim Ross, Bryan Danielson, Taz

It’s still Quake By The Lake week and that means a lot of talking this time, as Bryan Danielson is back after getting beaten up by Daniel Garcia a few weeks back. Other than that, we have Orange Cassidy in action and that can oddly work. Rampage hasn’t been great in recent weeks so maybe they can pick it up tonight. Let’s get to it.

Here is Dynamite if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is Bryan Danielson to get things going. Tony Schiavone asks him about Daniel Garcia calling himself the Dragon Slayer. Danielson talks about how he has been wrestling for 23 years and now he needs to live to the fullest. That means he can never stop wrestling and his career is not ending next Wednesday.

Cue Garcia to interrupt and call Danielson his hero, but it sounds like his hero is ready to lose. Garcia is ready to make Danielson call him the greatest sports entertainer alive. That’s too far for Danielson, who doesn’t like what Chris Jericho is putting in Garcia’s head. Danielson talked about Garcia being a founding member of the Blackpool Combat Club because he remembers seeing Garcia wrestle for 60 minutes in front of 250 people. With a grab of Garcia’s face, Danielson asks if he wants to be a sports entertainer or a wrestler before walking out. Garcia looks a bit shaken.

We look back at CM Punk’s return and showdown with Jon Moxley on Dynamite.

AAA Mixed Tag Team Titles: Tay Melo/Sammy Guevara vs. Dante Martin/Skye Blue

Melo and Guevara, the newlyweds, are defending. It’s a brawl to start with the women brawling on the floor and Martin hammering away on Guevara inside. We settle down to Melo saving Guevara from a whip into the ropes and comes in, complete with a kiss. Said kiss takes too long though and Blue comes in with a high crossbody, setting off a beating. Melo pulls her into…some kind of a stretch on the mat but Blue is back up with a running knee into a spinning kick to the face. Guevara grabs Blue’s foot though and a pump kick drops her as we take a break.

Back with the guys coming back in to start the strike off with Martin sending Guevara outside for a dive. Melo comes back in for a distraction so Martin uses her as a launchpad into a Canadian Destroyer for two more. Back up and Melo plants Martin with a floatover DDT (Tony is WAY too impressed by that) but Skye takes out Guevara with a high crossbody. Not that it matters as the TayKO finishes for Melo at 7:18.

Rating: C+. Guevara’s dives are often worth a look and there is a bit of a history here to keep it somewhat more interesting. More importantly though, it is nice to have Martin walking after that scare a few weeks ago. The match was good enough, but you can imagine Guevara and Melo were still adjusting to their new normal.

The Lucha Bros are excited about Pac being back so the Death Triangle can be at full strength.

Parker Boudreaux vs. Sonny Kiss

Slim J is here with the debuting Boudreaux, better known as Harland in NXT. Boudreaux runs Kiss over to start and slugs away in the corner but gets caught with the handspring slap. A chokeslam drops Kiss and a belly to back slam finishes for Boudreaux at 1:01.

La Faccion Ingobernable yells at Private Party, who aren’t having it. Private Party is ready for Keith Lee/Swerve Strickland next week.

Gunn Club vs. Danhausen/Erick Redbeard

Billy Gunn is here with the Gunn Club. Redbeard shoves Colten down to start so Austin comes in, earning himself a hard shoulder down. Danhausen comes in and gets thrown into the corner as we take a break. Back with Danhausen slipping between Austin’s legs and handing it back to Redbeard for the house cleaning.

Everything breaks down and Redbeard hits a running crossbody to drop the Club on the floor. Back in and a slingshot hilo connects, setting up a spinning kick to the face for two on Austin with Colten making the save. Redbeard suplexes both Gunns but Billy low bridges him to the floor. The Fameasser gives Austin the pin at 7:00.

Rating: C. Well, the regular team beat the makeshift team by pinning someone who is usually cannon fodder, so at least they went with what makes sense. Redbeard is someone who looks good and is fine for an enforcer, but the Gunn Club should be picking up wins so they went with the right decision here.

Post match Billy yells at his kids and says he misses the Acclaimed. They need to toughen up a bit and do what he taught them. They can prove themselves next week on Dynamite, opponents unknown. Billy walks off but Stokely Hathaway pops up in the crowd with his business card, but the Club walks off.

Keith Lee/Swerve Strickland are ready for Private Party, who aren’t even in the top five. They can get a chance anyway.

Here’s Hook for a chat and he actually says something: YEP, when asked if the title is really going to be up in an open challenge on Dynamite. Cue Zack Clayton from Jersey Shore to say he’s taking the title next week.

Ari Daivari is ready for Orange Cassidy, even if Cassidy won’t join the Trustbusters. Cassidy does Mark Henry’s line so Henry cuts him off and does it properly.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

Ari Daivari vs. Orange Cassidy

The Trustbusters and Best Friends are here too. Hold on as Daivari gives Cassidy one more chance to join the Trustbusters and all he has to do is lay down. Cassidy does, but then rolls over before the cover. After a hug from the Best Friends, they go back inside for some grappling, including Cassidy using his hands in the pockets to knock Daivari away. The dropkick and nip up keep Daivari down but he manages a shot of his own. A Trustbusters hug on the floor sends us to an early break.

Back with Daivari holding a sleeper until Cassidy makes the rope…and gets put right back into the sleeper. That’s smarter than most wrestlers. Cassidy gets out again and they collide for a double knockdown. Back up and Cassidy’s spinning DDT is blocked and Daivari hits a running neckbreaker.

Cassidy tries the Orange Punch but gets caught in a Rock Bottom for two. Another spinning DDT works better for Cassidy, followed by the top rope DDT for a rather near fall. Everyone gets in a fight on the floor so Cassidy hits a dive to break it up. Back in and Daivari catches him on top with an Iconoclasm for two, only to get caught with the Orange Punch for the pin at 13:05.

Rating: C. This is one of the places where Cassidy can shine. Cassidy beat someone who didn’t exactly come off as a threat to become a major star and got to do his fun offense at the time. As long as AEW can avoid going too far with Cassidy, he’s one of the more consistently popular and oftentimes entertaining guys around here. Plus he beat the still mostly worthless Daivari and that’s always a good thing.

Post match Boudreaux gets to clean house but Sonny Kiss comes in and jumps Cassidy so Boudreaux can lay him out. Kiss is a Trustbuster to end the show.

So yes, the stable is actually Daivari (not even the best known Daivari in wrestling), Boudreaux (Joe Gacy’s lackey), Slim J (who looks like he would fit in great at any independent show in 2001) and Kiss (who has never won a match on Dynamite/Rampage and until tonight, hasn’t wrestled on either since September 2020). For some reason that lineup is not only in the tournament, but just got half of the matches on this show. What a great week.

Overall Rating: C-. I really wasn’t feeling this one as it continues to seem like AEW has given up on this show. Other than Danielson/Garcia, this was a bunch of lower to midcard stuff at best and that doesn’t make for the most interesting hour. I’m not sure why I’m supposed to be interested in Daivari and company, leaving the Gunn Club and the newlyweds to carry most of the night. The show wasn’t terrible, but it really wasn’t compelling and in a lot of ways that’s worse.

Results
Tay Melo/Sammy Guevara b. Skye Blue/Dante Martin – TayKO to Blue
Parker Boudreaux b. Sonny Kiss – Belly to back slam
Gunn Club b. Erick Redbeard/Danhausen – Fameasser to Danhausen
Orange Cassidy b. Ari Daivari – Orange Punch

 

 

 

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Revolution 2022: I’ll Settle For A Classic

Revolution 2022
Date: March 6, 2022
Location: Addition Financial Arena, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Excalibur, Jim Ross, Tony Schiavone

We’re back on pay per view and that is usually a pretty good thing for AEW. This is an absolutely packed show with a twelve match (counting the Buy In) card, featuring a double main event of Hangman Page defending the World Title against Adam Cole and a dog collar match between CM Punk and MJF. Let’s get to it.

Buy-In: Leyla Hirsch vs. Kris Statlander

Grudge match. Leyla wastes no time in hammering away and taking Statlander down. They head outside, with Hirsch tying the arm up in the steps and crushing it hard for a nasty visual. Back in and Statlander gets in a shot of her own, only to get tied in the Tree of Woe. The arm is tied in the ropes again and there’s a running dropkick to said arm, knocking Statlander back to the mat.

Statlander avoids a shot though and it’s a bodyscissors to keep Hirsch down. That’s broken up and they slug it out until Statlander grabs a backbreaker for a breather. Hirsch gets sent into the corner for a running kick to the face and it’s time to head to the apron. A running hurricanrana sends Statlander crashing to the floor, though Hirsch’s back is banged up too. Back in and the cross armbreaker has Statlander in trouble until she gets a leg on the rope.

Hirsch changes plans by trying a rollup out of the corner, only to get caught in an electric chair faceplant. Something like a Michinoku Driver gives Statlander two so Hirsch rolls outside. That lets her pull out a spare turnbuckle, which goes upside Statlander’s head, because the referee isn’t very good at his job. The moonsault gives Hirsch the pin at 9:51.

Rating: C. I’m not sure why this needed to be on the card tonight as it felt more like something you put on Dynamite. Hirsch continues to impress as there is always a place for a wrestler/grappler like her. Statlander even got cheated out of the match so they can go to a rematch if they want, which is not the worst idea.

Buy-In: Hook vs. QT Marshall

Hook starts fast and throws him down, setting up something like an STF to send Marshall out to the floor. Marshall tries to get in a few shots but gets sent outside for a suplex (Taz: “POP THOSE HIPS!”) on the floor. Back in and Marshall manages to send him face first into the buckle, setting up a jumping elbow for two. Marshall goes up top but gets suplexed back down for a big crash. Another suplex sets up Redrum to finish Marshall at 5:01.

Rating: C. I believe that is Hook’s longest match to date and he continues to do his thing very well. He doesn’t have the most impressive look but there is something to be said for the idea of having someone with a unique presentation who is a killer once the bell rings. At some point he will have to move up to better competition, but for now, things are working well for him in these short bursts. Plus, who doesn’t love to see Marshall get beaten up?

Buy-In: House of Black vs. Penta Obscuro/Erick Redbeard/Pac

Matthews and Obscuro start things off and stare at each other for a long time. Penta does the CERO MIEDO and gets his fingers bent backwards. Matthews gets taken down but neither can hit a low superkick. A rollup gives Penta two and they both flip up to their feet. King and Redbeard come in to exchange a bunch of shoulders, setting up the slugout. Everything breaks down with the other four brawling on the floor, leaving Redbeard to dropkick King to the floor.

Redbeard follows to take out the rest of the House, including a running crossbody to King. Back in and Black hits a Cannonball in the corner for tow on Penta as we settle down again. Penta gets over for the tag to Pac, who fires off some kicks. Matthews catches him with a hanging DDT though and now it’s Pac being caught in the corner for the rotating beatdown. Black grabs a headscissors to keep Pac in trouble, with Matthews distraction the referee so he doesn’t see Pac make the rope.

The beating continues but Pac finally gets in a shot of his own, allowing the hot tag to Penta. That means house can really be cleaned, including a catapult sending Penta into a Canadian Destroyer to Matthews. A low superkick rocks King and we slow down a bit with Matthews mostly done. Redbeard manages a slingshot hilo to crush Matthews but Black comes in off a blind tag.

Some kicks rock Redbeard but he muscles Black up for the suplex into the corner. Pac comes back in with a springboard missile dropkick and the poisonrana to drop Black on his head. Everything breaks down and it’s Redbeard vs. King in the big forearm slugout. Redbeard kicks him in the face but gets picked up for Death Valley Driver. Redbeard and King head outside, leaving the other four to pull themselves to their feet for the slugout.

The House gets taken down, including a snap German suplex to Black and a big running flip dive to Matthews. Penta can’t hit Made In Japan on the apron as Black slips out and hits his own kick. That earns Penta kicks Black right back, setting up the Fear Factor on the apron. Back in and Matthews stomps Pac and Black kicks Pac in the face (What Fear Factor?), only to have Redbeard come back in for the staredown.

Redbeard grabs Matthews by the throat but Black kicks him in the face. That doesn’t bother Redbeard, who grabs Black by the throat for the chokeslam, only to get misted in the face. A running knee from Matthews sets up the over the shoulder piledriver to give King the pin at 17:22.

Rating: B. This felt like it belonged on a fairly big show, or as a really featured Rampage main event. Redbeard did feel like he was there to take the pin until Fenix gets back for the real showdown and that isn’t a bad idea. This feud has some legs, even if Black’s creepy/evil stuff might start getting a little tiresome. Adding in Matthews helps keep thing fresh too, and the quality of the match makes up for most of the issues from the buildup.

A video from Draft Kings tells us how to gamble on the show and we’re ready to go.

Chris Jericho vs. Eddie Kingston

They’re starting big and Eddie goes right to it with a half and half to rock Jericho early. A neckbreaker gives Kingston two and we’re off to the early chinlock. Jericho breaks that up and takes him to the floor for a rake to the eye to take over. Back in and an enziguri staggers Eddie but he pops up to chop it out. Kingston goes with the Kenta Kobashi chops and then bites Jericho’s head in the corner.

Jericho slips out and hits some corner clotheslines, setting up the top rope hurricanrana for two. With that not working, Jericho unhooks a turnbuckle pad but doesn’t seem to like his decision. They fight to the apron with Jericho suplexing him down to the floor in a big crash. Back in and Jericho hits a German suplex and gives us a big evil grin. The Lionsault (with Eddie having to slide over) sets up a Lionsault without too much spring to Kingston’s face for two. Kingston gets in a desperation lariat but Jericho pulls him into the Walls.

The rope is eventually reached and it’s Kingston coming back with a Saito suplex. The spinning backfist gives Kingston two and he can’t believe the kickout. Kingston’s northern lights bomb is countered into a Codebreaker for two and now Jericho cant believe it. Kingston gets up and gets caught with another suplex, only to pop up. Jericho cuts him off with another Codebreaker but the Judas Effect misses. A pair of spinning backfists drop Jericho and the Stretch Plum makes Jericho tap at 12:19.

Rating: B. This is a good example of how to put someone over and it was long overdue. Kingston has been knocking at the door of success for a long time now and Jericho is the kind of person to put him over. They beat each other up well and Kingston got the win that he has been needing for a very long time now. Hard hitting opener with the feel good ending.

Eddie looking shocked that he won and even checking with the referee is a great touch. Jericho won’t shake hands, even after he promised to do so.

Here’s the card you already paid to see.

Tag Team Titles: Young Bucks vs. ReDRagon vs. Jurassic Express

The Express is defending and this is one fall to a finish. Jungle Boy gets taken into the Bucks’ corner to start as Bobby Fish will not stop running his mouth. A double slam of some kind is escaped and it’s Luchasaurus coming in to chop away at Matt Jackson. ReDRagon gets chopped down too but all four challengers bail before Luchasaurus can dive. They don’t get away from Jungle Boy’s dive though and the champs are in control early.

Back in and some double teaming puts Luchasaurus down on the floor, meaning the big group beatdown is on. Back in and a running neckbreaker onto a knee puts Jungle Boy down for two, with Fish making a save to annoy Matt. ReDRagon’s double belly to back suplex is escaped and Nick tags himself in. Jungle Boy gets sent outside but blocks Nick’s apron kick, leaving ReDRagon and the Bucks to argue some more.

That’s enough to allow the hot tag to Luchasaurus so house can be cleaned, including some kicks to the Bucks. A moonsault off the apron takes out ReDRagon but the Bucks are back up to kick Luchasaurus down. Luchasaurus is fine enough to plant Matt for two, leaving Matt holding his back. Matt winds up on Luchasaurus’ shoulders, allowing Jungle Boy to run the corner and hit a top rope clothesline for two.

Luchasaurus gets kicked down but O’Reilly is back in to kick away at Matt. Jungle Boy goes to the apron to kick Matt in the back but ReDRagon grabs a DDT, which is kicked into a wheelbarrow suplex for two. O’Reilly hits the top rope knee to Jungle Boy’s leg and the kneebar goes on. That’s broken up as well and Luchasaurus chokeslams Nick off the top. O’Reilly comes in with a front chancery to Luchasaurus but Jungle Boy comes off the top with a shooting star to the two of them for the break.

ReDRagon goes high/low on Jungle Boy for two but it’s Matt coming back in to go after Jungle Boy this time. O’Reilly has to make a save of his own and Matt is annoyed, only to miss More Bang For Your Buck. A hurricanrana into a German suplex takes the Bucks down and it’s Luchasaurus hitting his big dive to the floor. Back in and the Throwassic Express finishes Matt to retain the titles at 18:36.

Rating: B+. This was the wild spotfest that it needed to be, as you know what you are getting with the Bucks in a three way match. The Express needed to win here to give them a fall over the Bucks to establish themselves as more of a dominant team, but it won’t matter if the focus shifts to the Bucks’ issues with ReDRagon. Hopefully that isn’t the case, but there is a bit of a precedent of things going in that direction.

Video on the Face of the Revolution ladder match.

Keith Lee vs. Powerhouse Hobbs vs. Wardlow vs. Ricky Starks vs. Orange Cassidy vs. Christian Cage

Ladder match for a future TNT Title shot. The three monsters clear the ring to start so Cassidy comes back in for the lazy kicks. Cassidy tries to climb up the people to get to the brass ring, only to be sent outside. The others come back in and it’s Starks getting up and climbing the ladder. Cassidy breaks that up and tries the very slow climb, allowing Christian to make the save.

With Cassidy sent outside, Christian puts a ladder in the corner but Lee does his rise up spot and crossbodies Christian and Starks at the same time. Cassidy’s attempt at a hurricanrana is blocked so Lee can swing him into the others. Lee goes for the ladder but Wardlow is here for the staredown. That lets Hobbs run the two of them over with the ladder but here is Starks for the Team Taz double run up the ladder. Cassidy makes the save this time and puts the ladder around his head for the helicopter.

Hobbs and Lee grab the ladder though (giving us a great “uh oh” face from Cassidy) and Cassidy is in trouble. They lift it into the air….so Cassidy skins the cat to land on the raised ladder and stands up to get a hand on the ring, only to get crotched back down (that was one of the most creative ladder match spots I’ve seen in a long time). The ladder is laid in the corner and Hobbs superplexes Cassidy back down for the huge crash.

Christian is back in now but Starks pulls the ladder away and dives through it with a spar to cut Christian down. Wardlow and Hobbs go up the ladder, with Starks and Cassidy climbing on Wardlow’s back…but not being able to stop them. Everyone winds up on the pair of ladders until Christian and Cassidy crash down. Starks and Lee go down too so it’s Hobbs and Wardlow fighting on top until the both fall too, leaving everyone down. The three monsters are back up and Lee Uncle Phil Biels Cassidy to the floor in a nasty crash. Everyone else winds up on the floor too so Wardlow and Hobbs go after a ladder on the stage.

They actually rip it in two with Hobbs knocking him down, as JR suggests they GO BACK TO THE RING. Lee and Hobbs wind up by the announcers’ desk, with Wardlow coming in to shove them both off the stage and through a table. Back in and Starks takes Christian down but it’s Danhausen to curse Starks, allowing Christian to make the save. Christian goes up but Starks makes another save, leaving Wardlow to powerbomb Christian hard. Wardlow powerbombs Starks off the ladder onto a bridged ladder and pulls down the ring for the win at 17:08.

Rating: B. It’s another spot fest with one big crash after another. Sometimes you need a car crash match like this one and the hosses getting to throw people around was a change of pace. Wardlow winning makes sense and we should be in for a good match when he faces (likely) Sammy Guevara. That Cassidy spot was a great bonus and I had another good time here.

Tony Schiavone brings out Shane Strickland to officially sign his AEW contract. Swerve is happy to be here and could tell us about the titles he is going to win, but first he needs to ask: who’s house? The fans say Swerve’s house and he loves them too. This was expected and is still an awesome sight.

TBS Title: Jade Cargill vs. Tay Conti

Cargill, with Mark Sterling, is defending and gets played to the ring. Conti tries to take it the mat to start but Cargill powers her way out. That means it’s time to mock Conti’s martial arts again so Conti sends her into the corner for some running shots to the face. A swinging DDT connects but Cargill’s feet are under the rope. Cargill heads outside so Conti goes up for a big flip dive, which takes Sterling out.

That lets Cargill kick Conti in the face to take over but Conti kicks her down back inside. Jaded and the DDTay are broken up so Cargill grabs a rollup, only to be kicked off into a chair as held up by an appearing Anna Jay. A DDT gives Conti two but Cargill is back with the Eye of the Storm for two of her own. Jade hits a frog splash of all things for two more so Conti comes back with a piledriver for the save. Cargill kicks her off and Conti might hit a camera in the corner. That’s enough to set up Jaded to retain the title at 6:50.

Rating: C+. Cargill continues to wrestle beyond her experience and Conti was a good challenger here. There might not have been the most drama as Conti felt like the challenger of the week, but she got in some good stuff of her own here. Cargill is going to need a big challenger coming up, but Conti did rather well for a spot like this.

Video on CM Punk vs. MJF. They started off with a war of words but MJF keeps getting the better of him, meaning it is time to get bloody and violent in a dog collar match.

Maxwell Jacob Friedman vs. CM Punk

MJF wears a robe to the ring but Punk comes out to Misaria Cantare, his old Ring of Honor theme. They pull each other closer by the chain with Punk missing a big swing. Punk chokes in the ropes before raining down rights and lefts. A big chain shot is broken up and MJF gets two off a Cheeky Nandos kick. Punk is back up with a running knee in the corner but the bulldog is countered with a pull of the chain. Punk’s back already has chain marks across it and there’s a chain shot to the head.

That leaves Punk VERY busted open so MJF asks for a censored mic. He tells Punk to quit on the people like Punk quick on him but Punk tell him what he can eat. Punk uses the chain to pull MJF off the middle rope and there’s a Russian legsweep with the chain. MJF is back up with a sleeper using the chain but Punk slips out, only to get caught in the Salt of the Earth. That’s broken up as well and Punk grabs the Anaconda Vice, which is escaped as well.

MJF sends him to the apron but the Heatseeker is countered to leave them both down again. A chained knee shot to MJF’s face busts him open too and it’s time to wrap the chain around said bleeding face. They head outside with Punk pounding away against the barricade. A crash into the steps bangs up Punk’s leg though and they’re both down. Back in and Punk loads up the GTS but the leg gives out to give MJF a breather.

MJF hits the knee with a chained fist and they go to the apron, where Punk hits a Tombstone piledriver to knock MJF silly. Punk’s knee is further banged up though and they’re both down again. MJF gets in another shot of his own and it’s time to bring in the thumbtacks. The running knee in the corner hits Punk this time but he bites the hand to get out of the bulldog.

Punk’s suplex onto the tacks is blocked and the Pepsi Plunge is as well so MJF superplexes him near the tacks (fair enough as they’re on the other side of the ring) for two. MJF has come unhooked from the chain so he calls Wardlow in as the chain is linked up again. Wardlow comes down but can’t find the ring, allowing Punk to hit the GTS, with MJF falling into the tacks. Punk looks at Wardlow, who puts the ring (which was in the other pocket) down on the apron and walks off. Punk pulls MJF up so MJF spits at him, earning a ring shot to the face for the pin at 26:22.

Rating: A-. In the words of Stu Nahan from Rocky, “they look like they’ve been in a war, these two.” That’s the feeling I got from Punk as he was sitting there after the win and that is how it was supposed to feel. I don’t know if they are going to have another match out of this as it felt like a blowoff, but one more time could be rather great. Above all else, this felt like two people out to hut each other and Punk survived in the end, which is all you could ask for. Awesome match and almost as great as it was hyped up as being.

Punk motions he wants the title.

We recap Thunder Rosa vs. Britt Baker for the Women’s Title. Baker says she is the women’s division and Rosa says she wants to be champion.

Women’s Title: Britt Baker vs. Thunder Rosa

Baker, with Jamie Hayter and Rebel, is defending. They fight over a lockup to start and go to the mat before fighting into the corner. Baker grabs a hammerlock but Rosa fights up, only to be driven up against the ropes. A neckbreaker drops Rosa and Jamie/Rebel mock her from the floor.

Rosa fights up again but Baker hammers her down into a rather appropriate hammerlock. Back up and Rosa hits a running kick into a northern lights suplex for two as the fans are trying to get into this. Rosa fights up with some elbows in the corner but gets butterfly suplexed for two. A superplex drops Baker again but Rosa holds on and lifts her up into a fireman’s carry swung into a faceplant.

The sliding lariat gets two on Baker but she’s back with a knockdown of her own. Lockjaw doesn’t work though and Baker goes to the corner, where a super Air Raid Crash gets two more. Rosa is back up with a Tombstone but Rebel has the referee to prevent a count. That means a choke to make Baker tap, but Rebel has the referee again. This time Rosa spears Rebel through the ropes, allowing Baker to hit the Stomp on the way back in for the pin to retain at 17:19.

Rating: C+. These two were in a terrible spot as there was no way to follow that dog collar match. It also doesn’t help that this was a pretty straight match as the followup to their all time brawl last year. It’s a weirdly built feud and this felt like a big time TV match instead of some major pay per view war. Not bad, but the fans weren’t into it and the ending was flat.

We recap Jon Moxley vs. Bryan Danielson. Moxley is back after rehab and Danielson wants the two of them to join forces and raise up the next generation. That’s a possibility, but Moxley can’t stand next to someone until he bleeds with them.

Jon Moxley vs. Bryan Danielson

Danielson wrestles him down to start so Moxley gets up for a breather. Then it’s Moxley driving him to the ropes so Danielson goes to the apron for a breather of his own. Moxley wins a slugout and drops Danielson with an elbow before firing off some YES Kicks. Danielson reverses one of them into a dragon screw legwhip though and now it’s time for the REAL YES Kicks.

More kicks have Moxley bailing to the floor before he comes back in and gets kicked in the corner. A shot to the ribs slows Moxley down and the running kick in the corner makes it worse. Danielson: “HOW’S THAT MOX?” We hit the guillotine but Moxley gets out and sends him outside for the suicide dive. Danielson is ready though and goes back inside, leaving Moxley to stick the landing.

That means Danielson can try a dive but Moxley blocks that too, setting up the slugout on the floor. The exchange of elbows busts Moxley open hard and Danielson starts striking away at the body. Moxley fights up and gets in a shot of his own though to put them both down. Danielson takes him to the corner and rakes the back, setting up a big superplex for two. Moxley is back up with a sleeper but Danielson backflips into a dragon sleeper, which is reversed into some elbows to the head.

A cross armbreaker has Danielson in trouble but he reverses into an armbar of his own, sending Moxley to the ropes. Danielson’s stomps are loaded up but Moxley ties up the legs so they can kick each other in the face. Moxley gets the better of it and puts on the bulldog choke, only to have Danielson roll out for a change.

The running knee gives Danielson two so he stomps on Moxley’s head. Now it’s a triangle choke to Moxley, complete with elbows to the head. Moxley gets creative by grabbing the beard but Danielson punches him in the face over and over. Somehow Moxley manages to flip over into a cradle though and Danielson is pinned at 21:02.

Rating: B. This was another bloody, violent fight with those shots to Moxley’s eyes being a nearly scary visual. What mattered here was letting both guys beat on each other until Moxley stole the win, as this was almost all about Danielson. Heck of a fight, but it was the secondary bloody war of the night.

Post match the fight stays on so referees come out. William Regal of all people debuts and gets in between them, but Moxley goes after Danielson again. Regal headbutts Moxley and slaps Danielson, which is enough to get them to shake hands. Well yeah that certainly worked.

Here’s what’s coming on Dynamite.

Darby Allin/Sting/Sammy Guevara vs. Andrade El Idolo/Isiah Kassidy/Matt Hardy

Texas Tornado match in Florida. Allin gets in another mini movie, showing the AHFO’s funeral and asking if he is crazy. It’s a brawl to start with Sting and Allin putting Andrade’s manager Jose in a trashcan so Allin can take him out with a suicide dive. Andrade makes the save though and hits a running suplex drop to send Sammy ribs first onto the barricade.

House is cleaned and Andrade rolls Allin up before tossing him into the corner in a kind of one armed buckle bomb. Sting and Hardy fight on the floor and Andrade misses a charge into the barricade. Cue Marq Quen to uneven the odds, setting up Silly String to plant Sammy on the floor. The fight heads into the crowd with Sting sending Hardy into the barricade. Butcher and Blade run in to jump Sting as Sammy fights Private Party on the stage.

Sammy goes onto a piece of the set with Kassidy, setting up a super Spanish Fly onto a pair of tables (with only one breaking). Butcher and Blade set up a bunch of tables but Sting fights up and hammers on the two of them. Sting takes Andrade back to the tables and hits a splash off the balcony to drive Andrade through all four of them in the HE’S 62 YEARS OLD spot of the match. Back in and Matt beats on Allin with a chair, only to have Sting make the save with a Scorpion Death Drop. Allin goes up and misses the Coffin Drop but gets the pin anyway at 13:12.

Rating: C+. I’m not big on the wild brawls and that was the case again here. Sting can still do all of those big dives, though I cringe a bit more every time he does one. Throw in Sammy and Kassidy’s scary landing on the stage and this felt like hoping no one was injured rather than an entertaining match, which is not a good sign. The action was fun and it was a crazy fight, but I could have done without it.

We recap Hangman Page vs. Adam Cole for the World Title. Page is champion, Cole wants to be World Champion. They came up in wrestling together and now Cole wants to be where Page is.

AEW World Title: Hangman Page vs. Adam Cole

Cole is challenging and comes out in Halo themed gear, though JR one ups him by not recognizing the AEW World Title (JR: “Is that a new title belt?”). Fans: “LET’S GO ADAM/ADAM SUCKS!” Ok that’s a great one. Page chops him up against the ropes as the fans want Adam to f*** him up. More chops in the corner set up a short arm lariat to put Cole down and Page adds a running boot to the head from the floor.

Cole manages to send him into the steps a few times though and it’s time to start on Page’s arm. Back in and we hit the arm crank before Cole starts talking about how Page will never be him. Page slaps him in the face and blocks a Panama Sunrise to put them both down. Cole gets sent to the apron so Page clotheslines him down, only to hurt the arm again. An apron powerbomb sets up a moonsault to the floor but the Buckshot doesn’t work for Page.

Instead Cole hits a Liger Bomb (with JR testing Excalibur about the difference between a powerbomb and a Liger Bomb and sounding defeated when Excalibur got it right) and goes up, only to get shoved back. Cole superkicks him out of the air but Page is back with the Deadeye for two. Fans: “THIS IS ADAM!” That’s somehow even better than the first. Back up and they trade shots to the face until Cole pulls him into a crossface. Page is right there for the rope so Cole slams him arm first onto the apron.

Back in and a Tombstone gets two (and JR is NOT happy with the kickout) but Page is back up with some shots to the face. Cole reverses a suplex into the brainbuster onto the knee for two and is frustrated at the kickout. Fans: “FIGHT FOR ADAM!” The go up top again with Page hitting a backflip World’s Strongest Slam for two more but here is ReDRagon to break up the Buckshot. Cole superkicks Page to the floor and it’s a Panama Sunrise on the floor, drawing what sounded like a HOLY ADAM chant.

Back in and Cole can’t believe another kickout so ReDRagon offers a distraction, allowing Cole to kick Page low. Another Panama Sunrise sets up the Boom for two but Page is back up again. The Buckshot is countered with a superkick but Page drops down to avoid another Boom. ReDRagon puts a table at ringside, only to have Page hit the Deadeye off the apron to put Cole through it instead.

Cue the Dark Order to check on Page and brawl off with ReDRagon, leaving Page to hit the Buckshot for two, as Cole gets his hand on the ropes. With nothing else working, Page uses his belt to tie Cole to the rope and fires off some superkicks (with Cole losing a tooth). Cole gets loose but Page knocks him down again, setting up his own Boom. Another Buckshot retains the title at 25:41.

Rating: B-. This was a pay per view main event, but it was a pay per view main event at the end of a VERY long show. The crowd chants were great and it certainly wasn’t bad, but this wasn’t exactly going out on a high note. Page does get a good win though and moves on to something bigger, though I wasn’t jazzed with this match coming in and they didn’t do anything to make it better here.

Page shows respect and celebrates to end the show.

Overall Rating: A-. Another excellent AEW show, but the crowd was starting to get worn down in the middle. I can absolutely sympathize with them on that as counting the Buy-In, this was about five hours with very few chances to breathe in the middle. AEW really could use a lesson in less is more, as there was a lot that could have been cut, or at least trimmed, on here to get done at least half an hour earlier.

Now that being said, this was another great AEW pay per view, with no bad matches, an instant classic in the dog collar match and an awesome moment with Regal debuting. AEW knows how to put together the action on these big shows, but they do need to learn how to present them a bit better. Fix some of those problems and this is a masterpiece, but for now I’ll settle for just a classic.

Results
Leyla Hirsch b. Kris Statlander – Moonsault
Hook b. QT Marshall – Redrum
House Of Black b. Erick Redbeard/Penta Obscuro/Pac – Over the shoulder piledriver to Redbeard
Eddie Kingston b. Chris Jericho – Stretch Plum
Jurassic Express b. Young Bucks and ReDRagon – Throwassic Express to Matt Jackson
Wardlow won the Face of the Revolution ladder match
Jade Cargill b. Tay Conti – Jaded
CM Punk b. Maxwell Jacob Friedman – Punch with the Dynamite Diamond Ring
Britt Baker b. Thunder Rosa – Curb stomp
Jon Moxley b Bryan Danielson – Rollup
Sting/Darby Allin/Sammy Guevara b. Matt Hardy/Isiah Kassidy/Andrade El Idolo – Coffin Drop to Hardy
Hangman Page b. Adam Cole – Buckshot Lariat

 

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Revolution 2022 Preview

It’s back to the pay per view schedule for AEW and that is a great thing to hear. AEW has a pretty awesome track record for pay per views and there is a good chance that it will do the same here. This time is a bit different though as there is a staggering twelve match card with three matches taking place on the Buy In. The positive thing is that the matches look good, but dang that is a lot. Let’s get to it.

Buy-In: QT Marshall vs. Hook

We’ll start off with one of the fun ones here as Hook has taken AEW by storm in his still short career. What seemed to start off as little more than a big joke has turned into a pretty great run from Hook, who has smashed a variety of people without overstaying his welcome once. I believe this will be his first live match though and that could make for a new challenge.

I mean, I say challenge as seriously as it can be meant as it’s Marshall across the ring from him, meaning Hook wins this in a walk. There is no reason to expect this match to go longer than about four minutes, with Hook grabbing Redrum for the win. Marshall should be good for helping Hook get to an ok match, but that’s about the extent of his usefulness in this spot.

Buy-In: Leyla Hirsch vs. Kris Statlander

This one is already more interesting as you have two such different styles. Statlander has taken the gloves off to insult her former friend while Hirsch continues to look ready to maul various humans at any given time. That should make for a showdown, though I’m not entirely sure how well these two are going to work together. Statlander can do well, but there are also times where she doesn’t quite click.

I’ll take Hirsch here, as she is rather perfect in her role as the tiny killing machine who could pull Statlander into a variety of knots. Statlander has promised a new version of herself, but that does not necessarily mean she is going to win. Neither would seem likely for a future title shot, but a Hirsch push sounds like the better option of the two. Either way I would expect at least one rematch, but Hirsch takes the first one.

Buy-In: House of Black vs. Pac/Penta Obscuro/Erick Redbeard

I’m not sure why this match is on the Buy-in, as it feels like it could headline either a Dynamite or Rampage and get more attention. Redbeard is substituting for the injured Rey Fenix, so while I can understand wanting to keep the feud warm until Fenix is back, it would seem that there are some better options than going this way. Still though, it should be a heck of a fight.

There is no reason for the newly expanded House of Black to lose here so we’ll say they make up for their loss in the recent tag match. If nothing else, Redbeard can be there to take a fall while keeping Pac and Obscuro strong on the way to Fenix’s return. This should be a wild brawl if they stick to what works best for them, but hopefully it gets the time that it needs and deserves.

TBS Title: Jade Cargill(c) vs. Tay Conti

The Cargill express continues as she mows down one challenger after another. That is going to make for a special moment when someone finally dethrones her and the question becomes who gets be the giant slayer. Conti is certainly a popular star and needs to win something big at some point, but I’m not sure if this is the spot where she finally breaks through.

I’ll take Cargill to retain here, as that is the more logical result. While I could see Conti being the one, Cargill seems more destined to eventually win the Women’s Title. I don’t know if she drops this title first, but she needs to be kept strong on the way there. At this point that means defeating Conti, who continues to be able to stay crazy popular despite rarely wining anything important.

Face Of The Revolution Ladder Match

Well of course it’s a ladder match and this time the winner gets a shot at the TNT Title. The appeal here is the amount of hosses involved in the thing, which should serve for some interesting options. For once I don’t think there are any names who can be immediately eliminated, which makes this all the more interesting. It’s the sign of a well put together match and AEW has set this up well.

I think I’ll take…Christian Cage to win here actually, as he really needs something to do. Keith Lee is a viable option as well as he came in with such fanfare, but he hasn’t exactly done much since his big debut toss of Isiah Kassidy. Neither of the Team Taz members make the most sense and Wardlow already has a story with MJF. Orange Cassidy….please no, so that leaves Cage in a prediction that is likely to go wrong.

AHFO vs. Sting/Darby Allin/Sammy Guevara

There is something very telling about this match. Earlier tonight I watched Andrade El Idolo, Sammy Guevara and Darby Allin tear the house down in an amazing triple threat that served as the main final push towards this match. That was great, but the idea of Matt Hardy being involved drags the rest of it down. His recent Jeff Hardy teases make it even worse and I’m not exactly interested in seeing the match.

The good thing is that it shouldn’t be a hard pick as I’ll take Sting and company for the win. You don’t have someone like Kassidy involved here to have his team win, so I’ll go with Allin pinning Kassidy so Sting can celebrate his first match in Orlando in however many years it is since he left Impact. This is another match that feels like it could be on Dynamite though and that isn’t a good sign for the show.

Jon Moxley vs. Bryan Danielson

This was all but set for Full Gear last year when Moxley had to step away for rehab. That was far more important, but I still want to see what these two can do. Moxley may be a brawler most of the time, but he knows how to make a match feel big. They have done that here, as there is almost a will they or won’t they vibe to the whole thing. The question is can Danielson get Moxley to join up with him, and we probably find that out here.

I think they do get to that point eventually, so we’ll go with Danielson winning here, likely through cheating. I’m not sure if they are going to be able to come up with a way to get the fans to boo Moxley, but it might work out if he gets to cut the right kind of promo. As much as I don’t want some new heel power alliance, it might be the best thing for everyone with Danielson having already run through his World Title shots and Moxley needing something to do.

Women’s Title: Britt Baker(c) vs. Thunder Rosa

We’ve been waiting for this one for about a year now, as these two went to war against each other back at St. Patrick’s Slam. Rosa won there, which should mean that she is able to do it again and get the title that she never picked up before. This is the match that has been set up for so long now that it has kind of hurt Baker’s reign, as you knew the rematch with Rosa was hanging over everything.

Despite an instinct to say otherwise, I’ll go with Rosa winning the title here. It’s kind of interesting that the match feels like it is coming in cold despite the history, as Rosa hasn’t done much lately. Other than pinning Baker this week on Dynamite, I can’t think of any major win that she has had in recent weeks. Then again I’ve never quite gotten how the rankings work, but Rosa’s 4-0 is better than Hirsch’s and Deeb’s because…well because she’s Rosa and is winning the title here.

Tag Team Titles: Jurassic Express(c) vs. Young Bucks vs. ReDRagon

I’m not sure what to think of this one but the Bucks getting another title shot is one of those things that shouldn’t be a big surprise. At the same time, it doesn’t feel like it is soon enough to put the titles back on them, making them more of a possible spoiler or road block than anything else. That leaves you with two potential winners, either of whom could leave with the titles.

I think I’m going to go with Jurassic Express retaining here, as they just haven’t held the titles for very long yet. If they lost here, they would have the shortest reign in the history of the titles to date and that is not something you want to see. ReDRagon will probably get the championships one day, but for now I think Jurassic Express retains. They can even do so with the Bucks costing ReDRagon the fall to continue the Bucks’ emotional issues that are oh so interesting.

Chris Jericho vs. Eddie Kingston

Here we have another grudge match for Jericho, who thankfully has turned heel after so many weeks of seemingly being ready to make the jump. That should make for an interesting showdown, as Kingston can bring it on the mic and does well enough in the ring to back it up. At some point he has to win something though, and that seems to be the point we are reaching now.

I’ll go out on a limb here and say they give Kingston the win here, as it is LONG overdue to give him a big victory, which has even been the story of the feud. At the end of the day, Jericho does not need to win another match in his career and will not lose a step, so have him put Kingston over and give him his big win merit badge. It needs to happen and this is as good of a time as any.

World Title: Hangman Page(c) vs. Adam Cole

I know the tradition is that the World Title headlines the show, but come on in this case. There are only so many ways you can present Page vs. Cole as the biggest match on the card and it seems to be the case. This just does not feel like a main event match, as Cole has felt like just the next challenger instead of some big moment. Maybe it was having him lose to Orange Cassidy and then moving into the title feud?

Page retains here and I don’t think there is all that much drama. There is almost no reason to believe that Cole is taking the title here as Page gets to retain the title on pay per view. The match is probably going to be a good one, assuming they don’t go all the way with one of Cole’s ridiculous long matches. I really hope this doesn’t headline, because there is something that is just flat out better.

CM Punk vs. Maxwell Jacob Friedman

Like this could have been anything else. This has been one of the best feuds AEW has presented yet (if not its best in history) and I want to see these two get so violence that they cannot go much further. Some of the angles that have taken place have been nothing short of amazing and now they need to stick the landing (or at least this part of the landing) to set up the big blowoff match. That means this needs to have a winner and I’m not sure where to go.

I’ll flip a coin here and go with Punk, as his win sets up the big blowoff, unless they have some other way for MJF to cheat and steal another win. What matters here is the violence and blood that need to come with a dog collar match and we should be in for a great one. Every important step in this feud has been pure gold and if they can find that again on the big stage, we are in for a treat.

Overall Thoughts

There is a lot of potential on this card, but it might be a hair too long. AEW has a tendency to try and cram in too much and that might be the case again here. That being said, the top part of this show is looking pretty awesome and there are several matches that could be nothing short of great. The dog collar match seems to be the big feature attraction, and if that works out, this show is going to be the latest on AEW’s incredible list.




No Peace Underground: Shallow Graves: I Bring This On Myself

Shallow Graves
Date: April 10, 2021
Location: Cuban Club, Tampa, Florida
Commentators: Drenen, Kid Osborne

This is another one from Wrestlemania Weekend and I’m not sure what to expect. I have a bad feeling that I’m getting into another hardcore/deathmatch/no rules kind of show and that is not going to be my cup of orange juice. Hopefully they surprise me and there are some talented names on the roster. Let’s get to it.

I know nothing about what is going on here so forgive me if I don’t know some storylines or characters.

After six minutes of a logo to start things off, James Mitchell joins us to say that we should beware of the pale horse called death.

The opening video looks at various death like things, including vultures and someone being buried, with the horror movie style credits running down the card (that’s clever).

Ryan Fox welcomes us to the show and talks about how this show is a year in the making. I’m assuming he’s the promoter, as he hypes up the opener.

So apparently this promotion doesn’t have a ring, but rather an open space with a bunch of weapons provided. Oh dear indeed.

The End vs. The Hustle and the Muscle

The End is Parrow/Odinson, a pair of hosses while Hustle/Muscle is Rohit Raju/Jake Something. Announcer: “Coming to the floor!” That’s going to take some getting used to. Hold on though as Raju needs a mic. Raju congratulates the fans for making it to the final show of the Collective and says how lucky they are to see some real wrestlers. He goes on a rant about how stupid Twitter is and now many fans pretend bad wrestlers are good.

It’s time to start and the brawl is on, sans bell (mainly because having a ring bell sans ring doesn’t make sense). They split up and fight around the….I guess the term is arena, as you probably saw coming. The cameras keep cutting back and forth between brawls as Osborne talks about how he could jump in there if he wanted to. Odinson swings Raju into a wall over and over as Parrow chairs Something in the back.

Something is sandwiched between some chairs, with Odinson hitting an AA onto the chairs (or a fireman’s carry into a backsplash according to Drenen). The fights split up again with Odinson kicking Raju in the face and Something planting Parrow onto a chair. Raju knees Odinson down some steps and a running knee knocks Odinson silly again. Some chairs are loaded up and Something throws Raju at Odinson, who counters into a spinebuster onto those chairs.

Something takes Odinson right back down though and sets up two chairs, with a door layed onto it like a ramp. Parrow is back up to throw Raju through a door as Osborne will not shut up about how great he was son other shows. Something is powerbombed against a wall and a chokeslam puts Raju through another door bridged over some chairs.

Jake breaks some lighttubes over Parrow’s head and gets glared at so all four grab chairs for the double duel. Parrow, with a very bloody back, gets the best of things but can’t follow up, leaving everyone down. Osborne: “I would have been the first one up. They were swinging those chairs like b******.” They’re all back up so the End can hit a Super Collider and the pin at 10:08.

Rating: C. What are you supposed to say about something like this? It isn’t a wrestling match and the weapons were there to make it even worse, but the End feel like a good power team. It’s going to take some time to get used to this stuff, but hopefully they tone the violence down a bit. I mean, I don’t think they will, but it gives me some hope for the next two hours.

Bam Sullivan, the Trash With The Stache, who looks to be an old western guy, is ready for Bobby Beverly. I’m not sure why he has a slice of pizza on his vest.

Ryan Fox hypes up the next match, as I’m assuming he’ll be doing for every match.

Bobby Beverly vs. Bam Sullivan

Actually never mind as both of them are injured. Worry not though as Osborne is right there to say he’s still a better promo than Sullivan anyway.

AJ Gray vs. Hardway Heeter

This is a replacement match and there is an inflatable alligator in the middle of the floor. Before the match, Gray isn’t happy with not being on the show in the first place and swears a lot. Heeter comes out with a bunch of red lights flashing and hits Gray with some lighttubes. Gray is back with some chair and lighttube shots of his own and it’s time to carve Heeter’s head open.

Heeter is back with more lighttubes, because five lighttubes are more impressive than one. Some chair shots each put them both down for a bit, with Heeter getting the better of things. They both grab lighttubes and break them over the other’s head, setting up a suplex to drop Heeter on the inflatable alligator. Gray has some goons load up a sheet of glass as Osborne complains about his lack of a title shot. Heeter fights back so he gets hit with a bunch of lighttubes, setting up a suplex off a platform and through the glass to finish Heeter at 4:30.

Rating: D. Yeah this was the bad one that I was expecting, as it was all about the lighttubes and glass because that’s the gold standard in a match like this. I wasn’t big on this whatsoever and Heeter looked like every indy guy in this kind of a promotion. Gray can do good stuff in regular matches, and the only good thing about this was that it was short.

Wolfe Taylor is tired of being buried around here in favor of all of the indy darlings. He’s never being buried again. At least they put a name with a face here.

And now, an intermission. I can go with the classic campy horror movie footage instead of just a graphic.

Said intermission is about a minute long, making me wonder what the point was. Did they run out of vignettes?

JJ Garrett vs. Cole Radrick vs. Wolfe Taylor vs. Jimmy Lloyd vs. Jordan Oliver

Everyone is brawling at once and it’s one fall to a finish. Garrett looks like a young Scott Steiner (including dressing like him and his intro mentioned Steiner) and Rardick is a small but talented guy. Hold on though as we have some replacements, with Oliver not actually here for whatever reason.

JJ Garrett vs. Cole Radrick vs. Wolfe Taylor vs. Jimmy Lloyd vs. Kevin Blackwood vs. Devon Monroe

Everyone is brawling at once and it’s one fall to a finish. Monroe is basically Sonny Kiss and is billed as Black Sexcellence. Lloyd is in a Hurt Business shirt and commentary references some kind of appearance he made involving the team. Blackwood is another surprise entrant and there is no mention of Oliver not being included. Everyone gets in a circle and Blackwood sits down in the middle because he’s a little odd.

That goes nowhere so it’s time to exchange strikes, with Blackwood getting the better of things. Taylor and Garrett exchange for a bit until Radrick interrupts to take Garrett down with a headscissors. Monroe knees Radrick in the face as people start pairing off. Blackwood sends Taylor into a metal hand rail and Lloyd hits Monroe in the face. That leaves us with the Blackwood vs. Lloyd showdown (the world has been waiting), which switches into Blackwood vs. Radrick for a more positive reaction.

They slap each other in the face over and over with Radrick getting the better of things, at least until a double kick to the face puts them both down. Wolfe gives Lloyd a tornado DDT onto the floor but grabs a chair instead of covering (Gorilla Monsoon would not approve). With the wrestling getting boring, it’s time to grab a door/frame/lighttube contraption. Lloyd Rock Bottoms Wolfe through it for two, because that isn’t a big enough spot yet.

Radrick puts Lloyd on a door bridged over chairs (Commentary: “WHEN WAS THAT SET UP???”) for a running cannonball off some steps. With that not even breaking the door, Radrick drops Blackwood onto an open chair. Blackwood pops up and Death Valley Drivers Radrick through the door but here’s Monroe to go after Blackwood instead. A discus forearm knocks Blackwood silly so here is Garrett to jump Monroe. Wolfe is back up for a fireman’s carry backbreaker to Garrett, followed by some face ripping….which is enough for the tap at 8:30.

Rating: C. Again, what are you expecting from something like this? It’s a bunch of people running around doing everything they can and no one got to stand out as a result. That’s how a match like this is always going to work, no matter how annoying it might be. I’ve never been a fan of these things, but you know you’re going to get one on a big indy show.

James Mitchell misquotes the Bible.

Matthew Justice vs. Erick Redbeard

Redbeard is of course better known as Erick Rowan and this is fallout from Redbeard jumping Justice at the end of a previous show. They throw trashcans at each other to start and then get to the more effective slugout. Justice gets in some chair shots but Redbeard hits him in the back and then throws a chair, setting up something like a Van Daminator. More chair shots have Justice down as commentary is convinced that all hope is lost. A table is set up but first Redbeard needs to kick Justice in the face.

That just wakes Justice up enough to send him into a door against a wall to start the comeback. Some chair shots keep Redbeard in trouble but he’s back with a trashcan over Justice’s head. Said trashcan is thrown (Fan: “THAT TRASHCAN HAS A FAMILY!!!”) but Redbeard is sent face first into a support beam. Redbeard BLASTS HIM In the face with a door and then hits the ground next to Justice with the door for a rather miserable visual. It’s time for the belt to come off for some whipping and choking, followed by a hanging from the stands.

Justice gets sent into a wall but avoids a charge to send Redbeard into it as well. A flip dive off the steps finally puts Redbeard down and now it’s time to whip him for a change. Justice chokes with the belt and throws a chair at his back to make it worse. A splash out of the stands drives Redbeard through a door for two so Justice tries it again, only to get trashcanned out of the air. Redbeard loads up a bunch of chairs and, after smacking Justice in the face, hits a claw slam off the stage onto the broken door and chairs for the pin at 11:47.

Rating: C-. This was a watchable enough back and forth big guy vs. little guy match and it worked out well enough. It’s nice to see Redbeard winning and that slap to the face was a great shot. I’m surprised Redbeard hasn’t gotten a deal with a bigger promotion yet, but he looked good as a monster here.

Respect is shown post match, which kind of defeats the purpose of a grudge.

Fox’s explanation for the next match: two guys beating on each other.

Mance Warner vs. Conor Claxton

This is a No Win Deathmatch, which I guess is different than the previous matches in….some way that isn’t important enough to explain. Warner coming out to Simple Man is rather great, while Claxton pulling out a cigarette, not so much. Joey Janela jumps in on commentary to make it more, ahem, interesting.

Warner throws him a lighttube and we’re going to be starting with a duel. That means hitting each other with the lighttubes, followed by a chain whip to Claxton’s back. The eye poke has Balor staggering off and Warner hits him with various other weapons. The bloody Claxton gets in a few shots of his own and sends Warner head first into a street sign on the floor. Warner is right back with the Bionic low blow as Claxton is favoring a previous shoulder injury.

There’s a lighttube shot over Claxton’s head and it is time to walk around some more. Claxton whips him through a door and stomps away though, meaning it’s time to wrap a chain around his hand. Janela shouts even more, going on about what he has been doing today. That’s it for Janela, who is off to do something else as Warner makes a comeback.

A DDT onto the floor isn’t even good enough to make Warner cover, with Osborne (accurately for once) yelling about how stupid that was. Some fan hands Warner more lighttubes (because he had those) and Warner finds a staple gun to make it worse. Warner steals the syringes that Claxton brought with him and stabs him in the mouth, because that’s how things go around here. A running knee drives the lighttubes into Claxton’s head (good thing he held them in place) for the pin at 8:41.

Rating: D-. Yeah this was bad, as it was nothing but a bunch of walking around with one spot after another. They threw in some lighttubes to try and make it more violent but this felt like it just came and went. I like Warner’s work from MLW, but this wasn’t working as it was the bad kind of deathmatch nonsense and didn’t do anything.

G-Raver is a monster but Su Yung has sent him an evil rose and James Mitchell is ready for her to end G-Raver for good.

Another intermission, featuring a funeral home documentary.

A woman named Jamie Senegal (I think?) says this show needs a diva so she’ll be a guest referee.

G-Raver vs. Su Yung

Senegal is guest referee and doesn’t seem that popular. Yung chases Jamie off to start and then stops to yell at the stairs. They go to opposite ends of the room and we’re ready to go, with the referee calling for a bell for the first time tonight. Raver throws her into a wall to start but Yung is back with a whip into the steps. A chair is tossed at Raver’s head but he shrugs it off and hammers away.

Raver knocks her down and gets in a stomp to the back but Yung hits him in the face. The spear sends Raver through a door for a delayed two and Yung needs a breather. Raver hits a kendo stick shot to the back but Yung gets in a few stick shots of her own. Cue a parade of undead brides and they’ve got glass. This takes so long that Raver is able to hit a knee to the face for his own delayed two.

Raver busts out some tattoo needles (I remember Race and Brisco doing that back in 74) and stabs them into Yung’s head (Race vs. Brisco in 75) but Yung mists him. Yung takes some time getting up and a double clothesline puts both of them down again. A palm strike knocks Raver down again and they get over to the glass stretched out on the chairs.

Both escape finishers until the Panic Switch sends Raver through the glass for two (with commentary freaking out). Cue the undead brides again as Yung puts on Raver’s mask. She also grabs the….whatever the Grim Reaper carries with him but can’t quite stab him. Instead, Raver powerbombs her onto the brides for the pin, despite the referee implying Yung kicked out.

Rating: D+. At least there was something of a story here, even if it wasn’t good for the most part. Yung is one of the better evil/dead characters you’ll see and she plays the part rather well. Raver is someone I’ve heard of before but he didn’t show me much here. The ending being messed up didn’t help either, but pinning someone on a pile of people can’t be easy.

Post match Yung is back up with a Mandible Claw and a bag of thumbtacks. Said tacks are put in Raver’s mouth for a palm strike, but he’s right back with a brainbuster onto a chair so he can leave. The undead brides carry Yung away, as is their custom.

Fox says all good things must come to an end, but he isn’t sure if he would call everything tonight good. Preach it brother.

Alex Colon vs. Masada

Deathmatch dream match or something. They go straight to the brawling with Colon punching away. Masada is back up trade various hard shots to the head, with Masada missing a bunch of chair shots. Colon gets a trashcan put over his head as they fight up into the crowd. The bloody Masada gets the better of things as they fight back down to the floor with Colon in trouble. Some chairs are set up with a big skewer board being sat on top of it.

Masada puts some of the skewers in Colon’s head and adds some sign shots. Colon puts some skewers back into Masada’s head, allowing him to walk around for the horrible visual. They slug it out with Masada hitting him low and busting out more skewers. It’s time for a barbed wire door to be laid over some chairs but Colon fights back. Two low blows cut that off and it’s the Death Valley Driver off the platform through the door to give Masada the pin at 7:57.

Rating: D. This was your freak show match with the skewers and all that garbage to wrap up the night. Colon got beaten up pretty badly here and Masada continues to be some kind of a deathmatch legend. It was all about the blood and violence with a not exactly huge spot to wrap it up. At least it’s over though.

We actually roll credits to wrap things up.

Overall Rating: D-. I don’t think there’s any secret to the fact that this is not for me and I would not have gotten into this if I knew what it was beforehand. I’m not sure how you can call it a wrestling show when they don’t actually have a ring but I guess that’s the point of something like this. It has its audience and that’s all bad and worse, but egads this is hard to watch at times. The only good thing is that it was barely two hours when you favor out all of the delays. Just more violence and brawling throughout, albeit with a few talented people sprinkled throughout.

 

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