Cyber Sunday 2008
Date: October 26, 2008
Location: US Airways Center, Phoenix, Arizona
Attendance: 7,981
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jim Ross, Tazz, Jerry Lawler, Matt Striker, Todd Grisham

It’s time for a weird show, as the point of the show is about the fans choosing the stipulations. That means a lot of the show isn’t really set up, even down to the kinds of matches that we’ll be seeing. The big matches are HHH defending the Smackdown World Title against someone (case in point) and Chris Jericho defending the Raw World Title against Batista, with guest referee to be determined. Let’s get to it.

The set is rather cool, with the entrance looking like a big phone.

Pre-Show: US Title: Shelton Benjamin vs. ???

R-Truth – 59%
Festus – 26%
MVP – 15%

Shockingly, Benjamin is defending against the person who has been coming for his title. Benjamin backs him into the corner to start but R-Truth backflips away and gets in a leg lariat. That’s cut off though and Benjamin grabs a chinlock, which is quickly broken up for some running clotheslines. Benjamin catches him on top though and jumps up, only to get knocked down for a missile dropkick. Back up and a quick Paydirt retains the title in a hurry.

Rating: C. This was a glorified dark match and that was only going to be so good no matter what they did. R-Truth continues to be a good way to start any show, as he is one of the most entertaining people on the roster. It should be time for Benjamin to move on to another challenger, though I’m not sure who that is going to be at the moment. Festus maybe?

The opening video features a bunch of wrestlers saying your vote doesn’t count. They then realize that it absolutely does, so the people better have voted wisely. Kind of an odd shift there, as what would the people have been voting for in the first place if the votes didn’t count?

Kane vs. Rey Mysterio

No Holds Barred – 39%
Falls Count Anywhere – 35%
2/3 Falls – 26%

That’s a lot more like it, as any of those could have conceivably won. Mysterio starts fast and knocks him outside, where a kendo stick shot to the leg has Kane in more trouble. Back in and Mysterio’s stop sign is cut off though and Kane sends him ribs first into the post. Kane drives him into a different post (for some variety you see) for two and the bad back is bent over Kane’s knee. The nerve hold sets up another backbreaker as Mysterio is in quite the level of trouble.

Mysterio finally goes to the eyes and comes out with a bulldog for the needed breather. A 619 attempt is cut off with a big boot so Kane grabs a chair, only to get caught in something like a Destino. An Arabian Facebuster gives Mysterio two but Kane easily uppercuts him out of the air. The steps are loaded up in the corner, with Kane missing a charge and getting drop toeholded into the steps. The springboard seated senton gives Mysterio two and he can’t believe the kickout. Back up and Mysterio slugs away with the air, setting up a quick 619. The springboard splash gives Mysterio the upset pin.

Rating: C+. This could have been a lot worse, though it was kind of weird that Mysterio beat him relatively clean. Mysterio just beat him down and got the pin for the big upset. I like the idea of an underdog coming back and getting the win, but it just didn’t have the most impact. Either way, not a bad opener as Mysterio knows exactly how to wrestle this kind of a match.

It’s time to meet the Divas in their Halloween costume.

Michelle McCool is an army brat.

Katie Lea is a vampire.

Lena Yada is a ninja.

Candice Michelle is Marilyn Monroe.

Chris Jericho runs into Ted DiBiase, Manu and Cody Rhodes to thank them for costing CM Punk the World Title. If they ever want to take it to the next level, do the same thing to Batista. That’s a no, because Rhodes and DiBiase might have a title defense, but DiBiase thinks Jericho’s match will be priceless.

Here are ECW GM Teddy Long and his assistant Tiffany to introduce the one ECW match tonight.

ECW Title: Matt Hardy vs. ???

Evan Bourne – 69%
Finlay – 25%
Mark Henry – 6%

Hardy is defending and dang that’s a pretty horrible result for Henry. Bourne was the pretty obvious pick but you would think the top heel would have done better than that. Hardy hits a running shoulder but gets caught with a dropkick to slow things down. A test of strength goes to Hardy until Bourne is back up with some rollups for two each. Back up and Hardy sends him into the corner and hits a hard clothesline so Bourne switches gears by going after the arm.

The standing moonsault gives Bourne two and he’s right back on the armbar. Bourne sends him to the floor but an Asai moonsault is broken up, allowing Hardy to get in a slam on the floor. The middle rope elbow to the back gives Hardy two more and it’s off to the abdominal stretch. With that broken up, Bourne gets in a quick hurricanrana but walks into a Side Effect for two more.

It works so well that Hardy does it again but Bourne kicks him out of the air. A moonsault press gives Bourne two and the top rope Meteora connects for the same. Hardy catches him up top but gets shoved down, only to avoid the shooting star press. The Twist Of Fate is countered into a backslide for a heck of a near fall but a second Twist connects to retain the title.

Rating: B. Hardy’s great look at Bourne after the match tells you the story, as he knows he survived over a talented but inexperienced challenge. Bourne is getting better and better every time and he’s the kind of young star that ECW needs. The roster is just dying for talent and Bourne is a good, young name who could boost it up rather nicely.

Post match Bourne goes to leave but Hardy shakes his hand to show some respect.

More Halloween costumes:

Beth Phoenix is a Knight Templar. That sword looks horrible.

Jillian Hall is Batgirl (missing on Netflix due to song issues).

Maria is a rabbit.

Kelly Kelly is a ship’s captain.

Next up, you get to pick the tag match we get to see:

John Morrison/The Miz vs. Cryme Tyme – 38%
Raw Tag Team Titles: Kofi Kingston/CM Punk vs. Cody Rhodes/Ted DiBiase Jr. – 35%
Mickie James/Jamie Noble vs. Layla/William Regal – 27%

John Morrison/The Miz vs. Cryme Tyme

Morrison and JTG take turns driving each other into the corner before it’s off to Miz. That’s fine with JTG, who takes him into the corner as well, this time for a running clothesline from Gaspard. A reverse Alabama Slam sends JTG onto Miz for two and it’s back to Morrison, who gets splashed in the corner (popular place in this match).

The villains are sent outside and Gaspard gorilla presses JTG onto them for a nice big crash. Back in and Morrison gets in a shot to Gaspard’s knee and Miz gets to elbow said knee as we slow down. Gaspard powers out of a half crab though and it’s back to JTG for some flipping neckbreakers. Morrison kicks him back down and scores with a running knee to the head for two of his own.

Miz grabs a chinlock for a bit but a catapult is broken up, allowing JTG to…roll Morrison into the wrong corner. With Morrison backing off, the tag brings in Gaspard to start cleaning house. A spinebuster gets two on Morrison so JTG forearms Miz, say it with me, into the corner. Miz gets in a shot to the knee though and the Moonlight Drive gives Morrison the quick pin.

Rating: C. This was a match that could have been on any given episode of Smackdown and it wouldn’t have felt much different. The good thing here though is they did have an actual feud and that made the match more interesting. Unfortunately it wasn’t particularly good and I wasn’t overly engaged for the most par.

Hey look. More costumes.

Tiffany is a nun in some less than standard attire.

Brie Bella is Cleopatra.

Natalya is a cop.

Eve Torres is a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle (Raphael, which likely can’t be used).

Chris Jericho asks Great Khali to make things fair in the main event. No.

Here are Santino Marella and Beth Phoenix for the Intercontinental Title match. According to the Honk-A-Meter, in just one week….and one year….he will be the greatest Intercontinental Champion of all time. After mocking Phoenix for being a place where wrestlers go to retire, like Shaquille O’Neal, Marella is quickly shut up by realizing that O’Neal is in the crowd. On to the others who should retire!

Intercontinental Title: Santino Marella vs. ???

Honky Tonk Man – 35%
Roddy Piper – 34%
Goldust – 31%

Marella, with Beth Phoenix, is defending and Honky Tonk seems rather pleased to be here. Before the match, Honky Tonk says he doesn’t know about cool and cocky, but Marella is BAD. Marella could be Intercontinental Champion for ten years and not be as great as he is. The dance off (you knew it was coming) is on and even Phoenix realizes this isn’t Marella’s thing. Marella hits him in the face and we’re ready to go, with a chase not really working. Honky Tonk gets in a knockdown but Phoenix trips him for the DQ in just over a minute.

Post match Marella screams at Phoenix for causing her to lose and here are the other legends to beat Marella up (thankfully Piper and Goldust have gotten over their 1996 issues). Honky Tonk getting in a Shake Rattle And Roll for old times’ sake is a nice bonus, even if he slips on Goldust’s wig.

Final costumes.

Maryse is a French maid. She previewed this on TV in the buildup

Layla is Princess Layla in a Star Wars joke.

Victoria is a banana who has appeal.

Mickie James is Lara Croft and….yeah she’s easily the best out of these options, mainly because her costume looks a lot more well made and doesn’t feel like she got it at Spirit Halloween.

We recap Big Show vs. Undertaker. Big Show beat him up last month at No Mercy (in a heck of a match) but you know that’s not how Undertaker accepts things. Therefore, it’s time for revenge.

Big Show vs. Undertaker

Last Man Standing – 49%
I Quit – 42%
Knockout – 9%

I’m a bit surprised Knockout was so low, but it did at least feel like all three were viable choices. Undertaker strikes away to start, as is his custom, before being sent over into the timekeeper’s area. That just earns him a heck of a chair shot to the head and Show staggers back inside. Show charges into a boot but just runs Undertaker over without much trouble.

It’s too early for the count so Show kicks him out to the floor with quite qthe impact. The ensuing chair shot only hits post and Undertaker blasts him in the face with a chair of his own for an eight count. The apron legdrop has Show in more trouble but he gets in a clothesline to put them both down. Some big headbutts have Show in trouble so Undertaker slugs away.

Show’s chokeslam attempt is countered into a DDT so he rips a turnbuckle pad off. Undertaker’s running boot in the corner misses and he crashes out to the floor, where Show sends him into various hard objects (sending Matt Striker running away, which at least makes the show better). A monitor to the head and a superkick put Undertaker over the barricade but he comes back with a chair shot.

For some reason Undertaker climbs onto the barricade, earning himself a chokeslam through the announcers’ table for a heck of a crash. It’s also good for a nine count so they go back inside, where Show decides to start punching. Naturally Undertaker gets the better of that and tries Old School, only to get chokeslammed for another near ten. The KO Punch gets another nine as Undertaker sits up, earning a chair to the head. Show goes after him but gets pulled into the Hell’s Gate. Show taps but then passes out, which is enough to give Undertaker the win.

Rating: B-. This was a pretty nice fight as these two can do some things if you don’t ask them to have a regular match. Trim a few minutes off of this and it’s even better but it did feel like Undertaker survived a war against a real monster. Undertaker could still go with this kind of a match and he survived until he caught Show, which worked rather well. Good stuff here and it should blow off the feud.

Chris Jericho complains to Mike Adamle and wants the guest referee stipulation thrown out, with teases of violence. Adamle still won’t change it, so Jericho says they can do this later. Dude there’s less than an hour in the show. How much later do you think you have?

Tazz brings out the Divas for the costume contest and Mickie James wins. And then they all fight. This is a perfect example of “it was what it was”.

We recap HHH defending the Smackdown World Title. This is less a question of “will Jeff Hardy get the shot” and more “can Vladimir Kozlov get less than 0%”. At least triple threat is there to offer the slightest drama.

Smackdown World Title: HHH vs. ???

Jeff Hardy – 57%
Jeff Hardy and Vladimir Kozlov – 38%
Vladimir Kozlov – 5%

HHH is defending and I’m surprised it was that close. HHH backs him into the corner to start (JTG did it better) and tells Hardy that he was that close. To what? They fight over arm control until Hardy snaps off some armdrags into an armbar. That stays on for a bit until Hardy goes up, only to get shoved hard into the barricade (ala Rob Van Dam). Back in and HHH stomps away before sending him arm first into the post.

Now an armbar has Hardy in trouble for a change, followed by a facebuster. Hardy shrugs that off and hits his wrap around clothesline to put them both down. Hardy’s basement dropkick connects, as does a sitout gordbuster for two. The slingshot dropkick is countered into a spinebuster though (that looked good) for two more.

Hardy goes up but dives into a crossface, which stays on for so long that Hardy looks more dismayed than in pain. That’s reversed into a cradle for two but HHH knocks him outside in another heap. Hardy is back up with Poetry In Motion off the steps and a pair of Whispers In The Wind (yes two of them) gets two, leaving them both down.

Now the slingshot dropkick can connect for two more but HHH is right back with a sleeper. That’s broken up rather quickly and a Twist Of Fate gives Hardy two. The Swanton connects but Hardy goes up again, with a second Swanton hitting raised knees. Hardy kicks him outside and connects (barely) with a slingshot dive before loading up another Swanton. This one is cut off a lot faster though, with HHH pulling him into the Pedigree to retain.

Rating: B+. These two work very well together and they did it again here, though dang Hardy losing to HHH again is a hard thing to see. The fans love him quite a bit but that is only going to survive so many losses. Hardy keeps getting closer to the title, though he has to actually win it a lot sooner rather than later.

We recap Batista challenging Chris Jericho for the Raw World Title. Batista became #1 contender but there have been issues with referees so let’s have a special guest. Unfortunately that has become the focus of the whole thing, with Batista and Jericho barely having an issue between them.

Raw World Title: Batista vs. Chris Jericho

Steve Austin – 74%
Shawn Michaels – 22%
Randy Orton – 4%

Jericho is defending and they would have been better off just announcing Austin and picking something else for the vote. Jericho slaps him in the face and is promptly shouldered in the corner. That’s enough for Jericho to try and leave, only for Austin to say the title is changing hands on a countout or DQ.

Austin not going after Jericho himself is a bit much to buy, though at least Jericho gets back inside for the beating from Batista. A suplex puts Jericho down again but Jericho pulls him to the floor for a baseball slide. The Triangle Dropkick is swatted away but Batista gets his leg tied in the rope to give Jericho a target. Jericho goes with the standard assortment of knee work, including a running dropkick to the leg.

The chinlock doesn’t do much to Batista and he sends Jericho into the corner, only to be sent face first into the buckle. The Walls are blocked so Jericho goes right back to the knee in a smart move. Batista is able to use the good leg for a big boot and they’re both down for a rather slow count.

Now the Walls can go on, with Jericho switching into a half crab (former partner Lance Storm would be proud). Batista makes the rope and grabs a Boss Man Slam for two, followed by a clothesline out of the air for the same. The spear only hits post but the shoulder is fine enough to hit a flying shoulder. The spinebuster is countered into a DDT to give Jericho two but Austin gets bumped.

Jericho hits a Codebreaker so here is Shawn Michaels for a ridiculously slow count. Batista hits the spear but JBL of all people comes in to break up the count (Why was he in full wrestling gear?), Austin is back up but Randy Orton runs in to knock him down. A belt shot gives Jericho two but Austin is back up and yells at Orton for being an idiot. The Stunner sends Orton outside and Jericho blocks a Stunner attempt. That means it’s a spinebuster into the Batista Bomb to give Batista the title.

Rating: C+. This was a weird one as again, it didn’t feel like Batista was having some personal issue with Jericho. Instead, it came off more like one of those indy show main events over Wrestlemania Weekend where an outsider gets the title shot and that’s the whole story. In this case the title happened to change hands but the focus wound up being on the referees. That’s a really odd way to go and while Batista getting the title is fine, it absolutely doesn’t feel like some big moment.

Beer is consumed to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. I really couldn’t figure out what to think about this overall as it’s so thrown together. We wound up seeing parts of what had been built up in previous weeks because so little was set in stone coming into the show. I didn’t hate it and it’s far from some disaster, but I can also see why they dropped this gimmick after this edition. It’s too hard to build to a show where you don’t know what you’re getting and that took away a lot from this one.

 

 

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ECW On Sci Fi
Date: October 21, 2008
Location: Entertainment Center, Laredo, Texas
Commentators: Todd Grisham, Matt Striker

We’re almost to Cyber Sunday and that means we have a total of one thing happening here. In this case that means a trio of wrestlers are coming after Matt Hardy’s ECW Title at the pay per view. That’s not the easiest way to present an hour long show but it isn’t like they’re inexperienced with this stuff. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is Matt Hardy to get things going. He has a bunch of people coming after his title, including a tough man in Finlay and an incredible athlete in Evan Bourne. Then there’s Mark Henry, who wants one more shot at Hardy. Well Hardy wants one more shot at Henry, who has his vote. This brings out Finlay and Hornswoggle, with the former saying he’s coming for the title in their first singles match on Sunday.

Evan Bourne joins them, with Finlay making short jokes (while standing next to a leprechaun). Mark Henry and Tony Atlas join us as well, with the latter threatening to hurt everyone in the triple threat tonight (as apparently there’s a triple threat tonight). Hardy doesn’t care who he is facing, because he’s keeping the title on Sunday.

Jack Swagger vs. Brett Badery

Badery tries to go after the leg to start and is quickly run over. The Red White And Blue Bomb finishes Badery fast.

Post match Swagger is asked about Tommy Dreamer. Swagger: “Tommy Who?” Something something Pinball Wizard.

Miz and John Morrison want to get voted in to face Cryme Tyme. Miz thinks he would have been a better running mate for John McCain than Sarah Palin.

Shad Gaspard vs. The Miz

JTG and John Morrison are here too. Gaspard backs him into the corner to start but misses a charge to give Miz an opening. A powerslam gets Gaspard out of trouble but he gets low bridged to the floor, with Miz’s baseball slide connecting. Back in and Gaspard fights out of an armbar, meaning it’s time to hit Miz in the face over and over. Morrison’s distraction is cut off by JTG and Gaspard gets in a spinebuster. Morrison kicks Gaspard in the back of the head…and that’s a DQ. I’m not sure if that’s how it was supposed to go as they seem a bit confused.

Rating: C. That’s a weird way to end the match as it seemed to come out of nowhere. Having a simple cheap shot be enough for the DQ was an odd way to go and it’s not like Gaspard gets much out of winning this way. Miz wasn’t good enough to carry a match on his own yet and it was kind of showing here, though at least it didn’t go that long.

John Cena is coming back. People like him.

Cyber Sunday rundown.

Ricky Ortiz is in the back with Tiffany when Hornswoggle and Finlay come trick or treating. The payoff: Teddy Long as Shad. Long: “There goes one bad….” Tiffany: “Shut your mouth.” I’ve seen dumber. Like Ricky Ortiz.

Finlay vs. Evan Bourne vs. Mark Henry

Striker explains the rules, saying all three “entertainers” are in the ring at once. Finlay and Bourne’s early double teaming doesn’t work as Henry fights back. A low bridge puts Henry on the floor so Finlay drops Bourne with a clothesline for two. Back up and Bourne sends Finlay into Henry on the floor but Henry is back in for the save.

We take a break and come back with Henry crushing Bourne in the corner, followed by a neck crank to Finlay. That’s broken up with Henry being sent outside, leaving Finlay to powerbomb Bourne for two. Henry is back in to block Finlay’s crucifix and World’s Strongest Slam Bourne at the same time, because that can be done. Finlay is back up with a DDT for two on Henry but seems to have hurt his pectoral muscle. Tony Atlas goes after Hornswoggle on the floor but the distraction lets Finlay grab the shillelagh to drop both of them. Bourne kicks Finlay down though and Air Bourne finishes Henry.

Rating: B-. Bourne is the best choice for the title match, as Finlay is only so interesting and Henry vs. Hardy has already been done. Hopefully the fans see it the same way, but that’s part of the point of Cyber Sunday: allowing the fans to be sent in the direction WWE wants. It might not work in the end, but at least the setup is working well enough.

Overall Rating: C. The main event was ok enough, but the rest of the show was just stuff filling in the card. It’s more of the same problem from ECW, as almost nothing but the title picture matters. The tag feud is more about Smackdown/Raw and Swagger vs. Dreamer…come on already. As usual, this show is so much easier to watch because it’s short, but that certainly doesn’t make it interesting.

 

 

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ECW On Sci Fi
Date: October 14, 2008
Location: Thomas & Mack Center, Las Vegas, Nevada
Attendance: 6,500
Commentators: Todd Grisham, Matt Striker

We’re coming up on Cyber Sunday and that means Matt Hardy is going to need a challenger for his ECW Title. There are only so many options available, but Mark Henry has to be a top option. The show needs something else to build towards, but that has been the case for a long time around here. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here are Mark Henry and Tony Atlas to get things going. We see Henry smashing through various people last week, with Atlas calling that a message. Henry wants another ECW Title shot against Matt Hardy but gets Teddy Long instead. Long says Henry doesn’t get a title shot just because he jumped Hardy, but he can be one of three options for the fans to pick as challenger at Cyber Sunday. We’ll have two more challengers, with the qualifying matches starting right now. Simple, to the point stuff here, as Long can do well.

Cyber Sunday Qualifying Match: Chavo Guerrero vs. Evan Bourne

Before the match, Bourne offers Henry a handshake and gets as far as you’re probably expecting. They fight over a lockup to start with Guerrero taking him to the mat with a headlock. Back up and Bourne knocks him to the floor and things slow down a bit. Guerrero gets back in to grab a headlock before grinding on an armbar.

Bourne pops up with a middle rope armbar, only to have Guerrero stomp him down in the corner. Back up again and Bourne sends him outside for the big running flip dive and we take a break. We come back with Guerrero working on the leg, including grabbing a Muta Lock. With that broken up, Bourne gets a quick rollup for two, followed by a jumping knee to the face.

Bourne goes up and gets crotched on top (Grisham: “Right in the capital of Thailand!) to give Guerrero two. Guerrero is right back on the leg but Bourne uses the good one for a kick to the side of the head. The super hurricanrana sets up the shooting star press (nice knee injury there) to give Bourne the pin.

Rating: B. This was a heck of a match as Bourne was able to showcase his talents rather well, as he seemed to know he was getting a big chance. At the same time, Guerrero deserves a lot of praise of his own. Guerrero’s job here was to make Bourne look good and that’s exactly what he did, with the result being one of the best matches on ECW in a long time.

Post match Henry comes in to crush Bourne for a World’s Strongest Slam and a mocking handshake.

You know who else has options for Cyber Sunday challengers? HHH.

The Boogeyman is still coming.

We look at Vladimir Kozlov taking out Jeff Hardy last week, setting up their match this week on Smackdown.

Tiffany, dressed as a Las Vegas showgirl, wants Teddy Long to be Elvis (yes she has a costume) for Halloween. Jack Swagger comes in to say he wants a title shot but here is Tommy Dreamer to say the same. Swagger mocks him for saying this isn’t 1996 and says he’s here to make a legacy, unlike Dreamer. I would say ouch, but that’s pretty accurate.

You can pick the referee for the Raw World Title match! This show has quite a bit of filler.

Cyber Sunday Qualifying Match: Finlay vs. John Morrison

Hornswoggle and Miz are here too. Finlay grabs a headlock to start but gets rolled up for a fast two. Naturally Finlay is fine on the mat and works on the leg, with Morrison having to grab a chinlock to escape again. A half crab sends Morrison over to the rope so he knocks Finlay down into an armbar as this is more technical than I was expecting.

Back up and Finlay sends Morrison outside onto Miz, with Hornswoggle getting in a dive as the referee is checking on Finlay’s absolutely damaged eye. We take a break and come back with Morrison staying on the arm and staying on the arm and then staying on the arm a big more.

Finlay is back up and gets kicked back down, meaning it’s more barring of the arm. They ram heads for an actual break and it’s Finlay up with a Regal Roll for two. Morrison’s backbreaker gets the same and draws in Hornswoggle, where he has to play some possum. Cue Mike Knox for a failed distraction but Cryme Tyme sneaks in with a shillelagh for Finlay, who knocks Morrison out for the win.

Rating: C+. If the idea here was to get Morrison over like Guerrero did for Bourne in the opener, it didn’t work. That never ending armbar killed whatever they were doing and the ending was only so interesting. I wasn’t getting into this one and it just dragged on forever, which didn’t work in the slightest.

And then Finlay knocks Cryme Tyme down with the shillelagh (that’s a mixture of rude and mean). As Finlay leaves, Mark Henry pops up for a World’s Strongest Slam.

Overall Rating: B-. That opener more than carried this show but it was clear that they didn’t have much to talk about here. That’s the problem with ECW, as it’s basically the ECW Title and nothing else. Bourne and Guerrero pulled this one up to another level though with a rather good match but the show only being about 45 minutes long was a big break as there just wasn’t much to see.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter and Bluesky @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Money in the Bank 2010
Date: July 18, 2010
Location: Sprint Center, Kansas City, Missouri
Attendance: 8,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, Matt Striker, Jerry Lawler

This was streamed almost a year ago and for me, that’s a pretty fast turnaround. One of the things that often interests me is looking back at a show that I haven’t thought about since maybe two days after it originally aired. This is the inaugural standalone edition of the match, which makes it a bit more interesting as there was already a Money In The Bank match at Wrestlemania. Other than that there’s…well whatever else is on this show. Let’s get to it.

The opening video talks about what you are willing to risk to have your dreams come true. Makes enough sense.

Kofi Kingston vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Christian vs. Cody Rhodes vs. Matt Hardy vs. Drew McIntyre vs. Kane vs. Big Show

For the Smackdown briefcase and Kingston is Intercontinental Champion. Striker talks about how Jack Swagger (6’6) has set the precedent for giants winning the briefcase. Cole immediately points out that size means nothing in these matches, cutting Striker off at the knees in the process. It’s a big brawl to start with Rhodes setting up a ladder and trying to go up. That doesn’t work well at all, as Kane and Show break it up and get in a fight of their own. Show gets the better of things and tries to climb…but breaks the rung.

After beating some people up, Show throws the ladder over the top and down onto Kane. Show goes outside to get a different ladder and is promptly beaten down. McIntyre loads up another ladder and sends Christian into it, meaning it’s time to set up the ladder inside. Hardy cuts him off but has to trade saves with Christian. Ziggler goes up top and slugs it out with Christian, who shoves him down.

Hardy breaks that up as well but the two of them have to double DDT Kane. Christian drops Hardy onto a bridged ladder but Hardy fights back and goes up again. That’s broken up as McIntyre pulls him down and sends various people into the post. Kane is back again and loads up the announcers’ table (Lawler makes sure to get his WWE Slurpee out of the way) but opts to grab a ladder instead.

Kingston (hey he’s still in this match) dropkicks the ladder into Kane’s face and then hits Trouble In Paradise to knock McIntyre onto the announcers’ table. The Boom Drop off the ladder drives McIntyre through the table (Striker: “That’s a Money In The Bank moment for Kofi Kingston!” Shut up Striker.) and they’re both down. Ziggler goes up and gets chokeslammed by Show, who then gets in a fight with Kane.

Show knocks him outside and then crushes Hardy and Christian underneath another ladder. That’s enough for Show to go outside and grab a huge, extra thick ladder. The ladder apparently weighs 350lbs so Show….can’t pull it over the top. He finally wakes up and shifts it underneath the top rope to get it inside. That takes way too long though and Rhodes makes the save with a ladder shot to the knee.

Ziggler pulls Rhodes down and goes in the direction of the giant ladder, with Show having none of that. Kingston springboards onto the ladder and tornado DDTs Show down. Rhodes dropkicks Kingston but gets sent crashing into the ladder to leave everyone down. It’s Show up next and climbing the big ladder, with Kane shoving him off and out to the floor. That means it’s time to bury Show underneath a pile of ladders, which is quite the visual.

A bunch of people go up the big ladder (which is big enough for two people to go up one side at a time), with Kane wrecking almost everyone. Ziggler jumps up behind him and grabs a sleeper, earning him a crash onto the pile of ladders (and Show underneath). Kingston is chokeslammed onto the same pile before Kane chases Rhodes up the ramp.

Rhodes is rammed into one of the armored trucks, allowing Kane to go up the ladder again. That’s cut off by Hardy and Christian’s double powerbomb, who get in a fight on top of the ladder. Both of them go crashing down…and McIntyre crawls back inside. He makes the slow climb, only to get chokeslammed by Kane, who gets the briefcase to win at 26:19.

Rating: B. There was a great match in there somewhere but it went on a bit too long and that hurt the whole things a bit. As a result, it was more just a good one, with all kinds of carnage and some big crashes. Show being buried was cool and Kane felt like an unstoppable monster who finally won the thing. I liked it quite a bit, but shave about five to eight minutes off and it’s that much better.

Raw World Champion Sheamus doesn’t want to hear about John Cena and the Nexus. Sheamus has been watching Nexus’ random attacks but he believed he was untouchable. Then on Raw he stared into their eyes and it was like looking at a soulless great white shark. He knows you have to worry about the Nexus, but no, of course he doesn’t respect Cena. Tonight, he’ll give Cena a worse beating than the Nexus did because he’s a bigger threat.

Raw Women’s Title: Eve Torres vs. Alicia Fox

Fox is defending. They fight over a lockup to start until Torres gets some rollups for two each. Torres’ running knee in the corner connects but a tornado DDT is blocked. Fox sends her back first into the apron and then bends said back over her knee. The double arm crank is on to stay on the back but Torres monkey flips her way out. Torres’ back gives out a bit but she’s able to put Fox down, setting up the standing moonsault for two. A kick to the head looks to set up a middle rope Swanton, which hits Fox’s raised knees. The ax kick retains the title at 5:53.

Rating: C+. This wasn’t a particularly great match but they had an easy story to follow and it made perfectly simple sense. You could see things going a bit better for the division around this point as the women were certainly getting at least a bit better. We were a long way off from it being great, but this is definitely a better result.

We look at Jack Swagger attacking Kane on Smackdown, with Rey Mysterio making the save and beating up Papa Swagger (as played by Bunkhouse Buck).

Swagger is on the phone with his mom, who isn’t happy with what he did. He finally tells her to shut up and seems to blame his father for what happened. Swagger says his dad got what he deserved for trying to steal the spotlight. He couldn’t risk Kane hurting him and his dad would have done the same thing. Tonight his dad can bask in his glory when he wins the World Title.

Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Hart Dynasty

The Usos, challenging and with Tamina (while Natalya is with the champs) have only been around for about two months and this is their first feud. Smith and Jey trade waistlocks to start with Smith getting the better of things. Kidd comes in for a hurricanrana but Jey goes with the more classic method of hitting Hart in the face. It’s off to Jimmy (thank goodness for different tights) to stomp away in the corner, followed by Jey’s running Umaga Attack for two.

The chinlock goes on but Smith is up with a backdrop to get out of trouble. Jimmy is right there to cut off the tag though and some stomping gets two. We’re already back to the chinlock, which is broken up just as fast for the tag to Kidd. House is cleaned but Kidd misses a blind tag and gets tossed into a Samoan drop for two. The Superfly Splash hits raised knees and it’s back to Smith for the big shoulder. Tamina’s distraction breaks up the Sharpshooter so Natalya takes her down, meaning the Sharpshooter can retain the titles at 5:53.

Rating: C+. This was a Raw match and pretty much nothing more, making it another case of filler. That’s kind of what happens when you have a pair of eight person matches as you don’t have much else to fill in the card. Unfortunately this isn’t the kind of a match that can be stretched out much longer, as 2010 wasn’t the best time for the tag division (granted that could be said about most of the time for….decades really).

We recap Rey Mysterio defending the Smackdown World Title against Jack Swagger. Mysterio won the title in a four way last month but now he has a torn ligament in his ankle. That’s quite the target for Swagger.

Smackdown World Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Jack Swagger

Mysterio is defending and badly limping on the way to the ring. Swagger goes right for the ankle to start, with Mysterio bailing straight to the ropes every time. An ankle lock attempt is cut off by some kicks to the head but it’s way too early for a 619. Instead Swagger powerslams him into the corner and ties him in the Tree Of Woe. The running shoulder misses though and Swagger bails outside, with Mysterio hitting a top rope seated senton

Back in and Mysterio gets caught on top, setting up a release belly to belly superplex. They head back outside, with Mysterio being sent into the announcers’ table for two back inside. Swagger starts in on the leg but Mysterio gets up, only to dive into…something like a Samoan drop. The running Vader Bomb misses though and Mysterio sends him into the corner for a split legged moonsault and a near fall. The sitout bulldog is countered into a wheelbarrow suplex to drop Mysterio again and a gutwrench powerbomb gets two.

A hurricanrana sends Swagger into the post but Swagger picks him up for a super powerslam. That’s reversed into a tornado DDT for a rather near fall and now the 619 connects. The West Coast Pop is blocked though and the Vader Bomb crushed Mysterio. Another Vader Bomb hits but Swagger would rather go after the leg than cover. The ankle lock goes on but Mysterio loses his boot and grabs a hurricanrana to retain at 10:46.

Rating: C+. So Swagger is done as a main eventer right? His whole thing is working on the ankle and he was fighting a much smaller opponent who had a bad ankle. Not only did he look like an idiot for not covering after hitting his other finisher twice, he then loses at all. The match was fine as a midcard fight, but this really didn’t feel like a World Title match.

Post match Swagger jumps him again and grabs the ankle lock. Cue Kane for the save and he chases Swagger to the back. Mysterio gets back up…and Kane is back with the briefcase. Eh points for a nice fake out.

Smackdown World Title: Kane vs. Rey Mysterio

Mysterio is defending and tries to limp away but gets caught with a chokeslam. A Tombstone gives Kane the pin and the title at 53 seconds.  It’s LONG past the point where Kane got another title so I’ll take it.

Edge is watching in the back when Chris Jericho interrupts. Edge tells him he has eyes in the back of his head and they bicker over Money In The Bank in hushed tones.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Layla vs. Kelly Kelly

Layla is defending and Michelle McCool and Tiffany are here too. To give you an idea of where the title was at this point, Layla’s big issue with Kelly is….she thinks Kelly smells bad. Kelly slaps her into the corner to start but misses a handspring elbow. Layla can’t get very far and is kicked outside, where she ties Kelly’s knee up in the ring skirt. That means Layla can start in on the leg, with McCool getting to laugh at her.

Layla baseball slides Kelly into McCool, who sits on the barricade to pose a bit. Kelly shoves her down and hits the K2 back inside, with McCool putting the foot on the rope. That earns McCool a double clothesline on the floor so Kelly tries a middle rope sunset flip, which is (badly) reversed into a rollup to retain at 3:53.

Rating: D+. This was quite the mess, with the interference either not doing much or feeling like it was just a way to fill in time. That’s on top of Kelly losing clean in the end, which is hardly a way to make her look like important. And again: a title match was set up over someone smelling bad. What more do you need to know here?

We look back at the Smackdown Money In The Bank ladder match and Kane cashing in.

Randy Orton vs. The Miz vs. Mark Henry vs. Ted DiBiase vs. John Morrison vs. Chris Jericho vs. Evan Bourne vs. Edge

Raw Money In The Bank, Miz is US Champion, and DiBiase’s theme music starts with “IT’S A NEW DAY!” Like that would ever catch on in wrestling. Edge throws in a ladder and gets inside for the opening bell before bailing out to the floor. The other seven clear the ring so Edge goes up the ladder with Orton making the save. DiBiase drops Morrison onto a ladder but Bourne cuts him off with a ladder shot.

Miz and Jericho get in a fight, with Miz actually getting the better of things until Henry throws a ladder at both of them. Henry gets knocked outside so Bourne goes up, with Orton making a save this time. The hanging DDT drops Bourne off the ladder but Morrison is back up with a Flying Chuck to Orton. Miz and DiBiase get sent into a ladder bridged in the corner so it’s time for a bunch of people to go up. Henry makes the save and clears out a pair of ladders but gets knocked down as well. With everyone on the floor, Maryse (here with DiBiase) takes off her heels and goes up but Morrison pulls her down.

The distraction lets DiBiase get most of the way up until Morrison makes another save. Miz leans a ladder against the post on the floor as Cole starts singing his praises. Morrison is right there again and uses the ladder to climb up top, where he then rides another ladder to the main ladder to stop Edge.

Unfortunately that lets Edge trap Morrison in the ladder and put another ladder over him but DiBiase is back in. A ladder winds up upside down and we’ve got a big old contraption. For some reason DiBiase dives at Henry, who plants him with a World’s Strongest Slam. Miz gets dropped onto a ladder onto Jericho but Edge and Orton cut Henry off from the climb. Henry is sent outside, where he gives Bourne a World’s Strongest Slam of his own. Edge spears Henry and a bunch of people climb up at once.

DiBiase is laid on a bridged ladder and shoved down to the floor for a heck of a nasty crash. An RKO hits Edge, leaving Edge and Morrison to go up top. Jericho winds up hanging upside down and Bourne hits Air Bourne on Orton. Bourne touches the briefcase but Jericho pulls himself up for the save. Jericho shoves Bourne down for a heck of a crash of his own so Edge goes up at the same time. Edge knocks Jericho into an RKO but gets shoved into the upside down ladder (OUCH). Orton goes up but gets shoved down by Miz, who gets the briefcase for the win at 20:38.

Rating: B. This was a bit shorter than the opener, though it didn’t have quite the same huge feeling as the other either. At the same time, I can absolutely go for Miz winning as you have to give someone new the chance. Despite not being the most popular star, Miz absolutely earned this and he elevated himself through the roster for years to get to this point. It’s a heck of an earned moment and I still love it. Other than that, this had some big, hard hitting spots but it was a pretty run of the mill Money In The Bank ladder match, which isn’t the best result when it’s the third of the year.

Post match Miz grabs the mic and rants about how this validates him because he is a future WWE Champion. This is a heck of a promo and you can tell Miz is happy with showing that he is on this level.

We recap Sheamus defending the Raw World Title against John Cena. Sheamus won the title last month in a four way thanks to the Nexus’ interference. Cena wants Sheamus to help him fight the Nexus, which Sheamus FINALLY did (after running away from them, which may have been smarter). Instead they’ll be fighting for the title in a cage to keep things more even. Sheamus beating Cena to win his first World Title, over Cena, has been mentioned a few times as well.

Raw World Title: Sheamus vs. John Cena

Cena is challenging in a cage. Sheamus wins the battle over a lockup to start and takes Cena into the corner to stomp away. That’s broken up as Cena takes him down to hammer away but charges into an elbow. Sheamus takes him outside the ropes for a face rake against the cage. Back up and Cena tries the shoulders, only to go flying into the cage. Sheamus tries to go up and gets caught in a superplex for his efforts.

The comeback takes too long though and Sheamus hits a DDT for two. The fans are of course behind Cena (they’re good about that) but a running ax handle to the head cuts them off. It works so well that Sheamus does it again and grabs a sleeper. Cena powers up but Sheamus jumps up for a bodyscissors of all things (Striker: “Nice.”) to bring him back down. They get up again and Cena climbs the corner with Sheamus on his back, only for Sheamus to drop down and sweep the leg.

Sheamus’ climb is cut off with a crash onto the ropes and they’re both down again. Now the running shoulders work a bit better for Cena and they go up top again. Sheamus is sent crashing down…but Cena would rather try, and miss, a super Five Knuckle Shuffle than climb out. We switch things up a bit as Cena is tied up in the ropes and Sheamus climbs over to him. Naturally Cena escapes and makes the save, with a super bulldog getting two. Back up and Sheamus grabs the Irish Curse and they’re both down again.

The Brogue Kick knocks Cena silly but Sheamus makes the brilliant move of climbing then stopping to pick Cena back up. The quick AA gives Cena two and here they come. Cue the Nexus with some bolt cutters to open the cage…but the referee manages to take them away. Another referee pulls the key out of his pocket and throws it into the crowd.

As this is going on, the referee inside gets bumped, meaning Cena’s STF makes Sheamus tap to no one. For reasons of “good guys in wrestling are stupid”, Cena lets go and climbs over the top, where Nexus is waiting on him. That’s enough interference for Sheamus to climb out and retain at 23:01.

Rating: C. This was pretty slow and the problem of Nexus is you’re just sitting there waiting around for them to show up. That doesn’t make for the best match and Sheamus was far from the better star that he would become. It’s not a bad match, but that was a long wait for Nexus to FINALLY get there.

Post match Sheamus sprints into the crowd and runs off. Cena is livid and beats up Michael Tarver before promising to take out every member of the Nexus before storming off to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. If you’ve been around long enough, you know how Money In The Bank shows work. You have two matches getting most of the focus and ring time, with maybe one other match feeling important. The cage match was big enough while Mysterio vs. Swagger was just…nothing. I liked the ladder matches and Kane cashing in was cool, but the ending felt more like a way to set up something for later. Good enough show, but it needed more than just the ladder matches.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter and Bluesky @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Wrestlemania XXVI
Date: March 28, 2010
Location: University of Phoenix Stadium, Glendale, Arizona
Attendance: 72,219
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Matt Striker
America The Beautiful: Fantasia

So last year at Wrestlemania XXV, Shawn Michaels and the Undertaker had one of the best matches ever. That means it’s time for a rematch, with Michaels career on the line. That is more than big enough for a special match, to the point where it makes John Cena vs. Batista for the WWE Title feel that less important. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Battle Royal

Mark Henry, Shad Gaspard, JTG, Goldust, Yoshi Tatsu, Santino Marella, Primo, Kung Fu Naki, Slam Master J., Jimmy Wang Yang, Chris Masters, Vladimir Kozlov, Great Khali, Finlay, William Regal, Luke Gallows, Carlito, Tyler Reks, Zack Ryder, Lance Archer, Mike Knox, Caylen Croft, Trent Beretta, Tyson Kidd, David Hart-Smith, Chavo Guerrero

Prime is out within seconds, followed by Beretta and Croft at the same time. Henry launches Chavo out but then gets tossed by Khali. A bunch of people get together to toss Khali before Cryme Tyme gets rid of Gallows. Then Shad tosses JTG because that’s how battle royals work. Regal and Finlay slug it out for old times’ sake before everyone breaks off for fights of their own.

Masters keeps putting people in the Masterlock and is eliminated for not being that bright. Kozlov eliminates Kidd and Hart-Smith before being tossed out as well. Funaki, Goldust, Regal and Shad are out in a row, with Reks following them. Santino starts using the Cobra and thankfully is tossed out by Finlay.

Archer gets rid of Yang and is quickly dropkicked out by Tatsu (Striker continues to try and get “The Poison Fist Of The Pacific Rim” over as a nickname for Tatsu. This is because Striker is really annoying.). Knox gets to clean house for a bit but cue Hornswoggle for a distraction, allowing Finlay to get in a shillelagh shot. The Tadpole Splash hits Knox and Finlay tosses Carlito. Ryder eliminates Finlay and Knox at the same time, leaving Tatsu to kick Ryder out at 8:43.

Rating: C. It’s a battle royal to get a bunch of people on the show. They didn’t waste time here and it gave the fans something to see during the pre-show, which is about all you can ask for here. Tatsu was someone who seemed like he was ready to move forward more than once but it just never came together. It’s not like this was some big win but he was as good of a winner as you could have had.

Fantasia sings America The Beautiful. Not well but she does sing it.

The opening video talks about what it means to be at Wrestlemania and how important it is to be here. This is the big chance and the stars will seize it.

The set has something of an ancient pyramid theme with another over the ring, both of which look cool. If nothing else, I’ve always liked I Made It.

Tag Team Titles: ShoMiz vs. R-Truth/John Morrison

ShoMiz is defending and there isn’t much of a story here, save for Truth and Morrison winning a triple threat match to get the title shot. Miz and Morrison start things off with Morrison getting the better of things. Truth comes in with a top rope legdrop for two into a WHAT’S UP. It’s off to Show, who sends Truth flying with a fall away slam. What looks to be a Vader Bomb is broken up via a Morrison kick to the head, followed by Morrison’s knee to Miz’s head. Show breaks up Starship Pain though, leaving Truth’s dive to Show to fail miserably. Back in and Show KO Punches Morrison for the pin to retain at 3:25.

Rating: C-. Not much to this one and it really would have been better off as a pre-show match. They didn’t even get four minutes and there is only so much you can do with the amount of time you might get on a regular TV show. ShoMiz was a fairly forgettable team and while it was nice to have the titles on the card, it’s not like this was anything remotely memorable.

Video on Wrestlemania Week, which always looks cool.

Randy Orton vs. Ted DiBiase vs. Cody Rhodes

Legacy implodes as Orton has had it with the two of them screwing up and turned on them, setting up this for some revenge. DiBiase and Rhodes go after him to start and it doesn’t go well early on. Orton gets smart by dividing and conquering but walks into a dropkick from DiBiase. The double teaming is on with both of them taking turns to punch Orton while the other holds him back. There’s a double suplex to put Orton down but he fights out of the corner (the fans approve).

The comeback doesn’t last long though as DiBiase hits a clothesline, setting up a High/Low to put Orton down again. Rhodes snaps off an Alabama Slam for two and the save from DiBiase means it’s time for the young hooligans to fight. Orton fights up and sends DiBiase to the floor, followed by a snap powerslam back inside. There’s the backbreaker to Rhodes but DiBiase pulls Orton outside. Rhodes’ dive only hits DiBiase so Orton hits the double hanging DDT. With DiBiase down on the floor, Orton Punts Rhodes and then RKO’s an invading DiBiase for the pin at 9:02.

Rating: C+. There wasn’t much in the way of drama here once DiBiase and Rhodes got in their offense. Orton looked like he was toying with them at the end, which was part of the reason why he was turning into a popular star all over again. This was about Orton smashing through his former lackeys and showing them who the real star was, which he did in quite the destruction by the end.

Vickie Guerrero and company are ready for their ten woman tag. Jillian Hall comes in for a song and whole thing turns into a Slim Jim commercial, with Santino Marella having a bite to change Jillian. First she’s Mae Young, then Gene Okerlund (yes in the same dress) and finally Melina. Wacky….I guess you could call it fun? This isn’t on the Network due to the music.

Money In The Bank

Christian, Dolph Ziggler, Drew McIntyre, Jack Swagger, Evan Bourne, Kane, Kofi Kingston, Matt Hardy, MVP, Shelton Benjamin

This is the last Wrestlemania MITB match before it would go on to get its own show this same year. It’s the usual melee to start with almost everyone going outside. The first ladder is sent inside about thirty seconds in but a bunch of people stop to go after McIntyre rather than climbing. Almost everyone tries to go up but gets stopped, with Kane chokeslamming Bourne over the top for a crash onto more people.

Swagger and Hardy get trapped behind a ladder in the corner and Christian monkey flips Kingston into the ladder onto them. Ziggler breaks it up and makes the climb but MVP pulls him right back down. Kingston hammers on Kane in the corner, earning himself a powerbomb onto a ladder. Benjamin goes up this time so it’s Swagger spearing him with another ladder to break it up.

Swagger gets caught under a ladder so Hardy and Christian hit him with a ladder each. One of the ladders is bridged into another, with Bourne kicking Christian off the bridged version. Air Bourne hits Christian and Bourne goes up, only to be cut off by Hardy. Swagger cuts Hardy off though and shoves him onto the bridged ladder for the huge crash. Shelton and MVP go up but come crashing down, leaving everyone on the floor for a bit.

Kane goes up but has to cut off Ziggler, including a chokeslam onto the ladder. With Kane distracted, Kofi comes back in to kick him in the head but the only ladder available is broken. Kofi gets crazy creative by using the pieces like stilts and jumping up the rungs, only to have McIntyre make the save.

McIntyre goes up but Hardy shoves the ladder over for the big crotching on top. It’s Matt going up this time until Christian is there as well but they both have to knock Kane down. That’s not enough for Christian, who hits the reverse DDT off the ladder to plant Matt again. Christian goes up again, only to have Swagger make the save and pull the case down for the win at 13:29.

Rating: B-. It was a wild match as usual but there is only so much you can do with ten people in a match trying to get in as much time as possible. The stilts spot was very unique and stood out more than anything else, though the rest was little more than the usual big spots and crashes. Swagger winning is a surprise, but WWE was trying something new and that’s often a good idea.

We look back at last night’s Hall Of Fame ceremony.

The Class of 2010 is introduced:

Stu Hart (represented by eight relatives)
Wendi Richter (seems very happy to be there)
Mad Dog Vachon (sadly in a wheelchair)
Antonio Inoki (not the strongest reaction)
Bob Uecker (nice reception)
Gorgeous George (represented by his former wife)
Ted DiBiase (by far the strongest reaction)

Sweet goodness that Hall of Fame theme is always awesome.

We recap HHH vs. Sheamus. After debuting on Raw and winning the WWE Title within a few weeks, Sheamus was knocked out of the Elimination Chamber by HHH, costing him the title. Sheamus then went on to talk about how much he loved watching HHH while growing up. Then Sheamus laid him out, which HHH liked because it’s what he did when he went after the Ultimate Warrior in 1996 (and yes they explained how badly it went). That plus a need for revenge makes for a Wrestlemania match.

HHH vs. Sheamus

HHH’s entrance goes on for a good while, as you might have expected. Sheamus drives him into the corner to start but HHH hits him in the face. It’s way too early for the Pedigree though as Sheamus bails out to the floor. Back in and a suplex drops Sheamus again, setting up the knee drop for one.

HHH goes old school (shocking I know) as we hit the Figure Four, with Sheamus going straight to the ropes. The fight goes outside with HHH being whipped into the steps, followed by the (yet to be named) Irish Curse back inside. An ax handle to the head cuts HHH off again and Sheamus grabs the armbar.

We’ll make that a chinlock but HHH suplexes his way to freedom, sending Striker into a FAR too long….whatever you call what he does. HHH grabs a DDT and they’re both down, followed by the expected slugout. There’s the running knee into the facebuster for two and a neckbreaker drops Sheamus for the same.

The yet to be named Brogue Kick misses so HHH tries the Pedigree, only to be reversed into the Brogue Kick for two. The fans are rather behind HHH, who fights out of the High Cross (Razor’s Edge) and gets two more off a spinebuster. Sheamus rolls out to the apron and manages another Brogue Kick…but takes too long and gets Pedigreed out of nowhere for the pin at 11:47.

Rating: B-. This is the type of match that will work almost every single time as you had two big strong guys beating the fire out of each other until the ending. That’s the kind of brawl that both of them know how to do (though Sheamus would get WAY better later on) and it worked here. That being said, Sheamus is the up and comer and loses to HHH, which seems to be a bit counterproductive, but this would hardly be the first time that happened.

We recap CM Punk vs. Rey Mysterio. After Mysterio cost Punk a spot in Money In The Bank, Punk scared the heck out of Mysterio’s daughter Aliyah. They then traded various attacks before Punk creepily sang Happy Birthday to Aliyah, which was too far. Now it’s time for their fight, with Mysterio having to join the Straight Edge Society if he loses.

CM Punk vs. Rey Mysterio

Punk has the Straight Edge Society (Luke Gallows and Serena) with him and talks about how these 70,000 people here are going to drink or try pills to make their problems go away. He can be their savior and lead them to a better place because he chooses to be drug free and better than everyone here. Mysterio is one of the Na’vi from Avatar, which isn’t quite the same as the superhero gear he tends to use.

Gallows offers an early distraction and Punk gets to stomp away in the corner before tying Mysterio in the Tree of Woe. A missed charge results in a crotching against the post though and they head to the floor…where Punk drops him face first onto the steps. Back in and Punk hammers away for two and we’re already in the chinlock. Mysterio fights out like he’s a top star who was in a chinlock and hits the springboard seated senton.

Punk snaps off a powerslam for two before hitting one heck of a kick to the head for the same. Four more near falls have Punk rather frustrated until Mysterio is up with a springboard moonsault DDT for two of his own. Mysterio’s frog splash misses to give Punk two more, meaning it’s time for even more frustration. Back up and Mysterio loads him up for the 619 but has to take out the Society. Not that it matters as the 619 into the springboard splash finishes Punk at 6:30.

Rating: C+. Another match that was good but they didn’t have the time to do very much. It had the stakes and they work well together, but there is only so much they can do when they have less than seven minutes. It makes perfect sense to have the loudmouth holier than thou heel get what’s coming to him and who better to do that than one of the resident superheroes?

We recap Bret Hart vs. Vince McMahon. Hart returned after thirteen years of bitterness after the Montreal Screwjob and of course Vince McMahon couldn’t let it to. Hart wanted to fight Vince at Wrestlemania but got turned down, only to have his leg broken in a car wreck in the parking lot. Then Vince agreed to fight him….and then Hart revealed he was gold bricking, because that’s just what Hart does.

Vince McMahon vs. Bret Hart

No Holds Barred. Hold on though as Vince grabs a mic and says he’s hired a bunch of lumberjacks, in the form of various members of the Hart Family. As a bonus, Bret’s brother Bruce can be guest referee! Bret isn’t overly shocked and says what’s done is done. If there is one thing about the Harts though, it’s that they got paid up front and the money is already in the bank.

If there is one thing he’s learned from the Montreal Screwjob, it’s there’s nothing better than a good double cross. The Harts, including Bret, are united, and tonight is the night that Bret screws Vince. The bell rings and Bret punches him down and chokes in the corner, with Vince bailing to the floor. That means the Harts can make it even worse, including a slap from Natalya (Striker: “Best luck in your future endeavors Natalya.”).

The Hart Dynasty hits a top rope Hart Attack to the floor and it’s time to throw Vince back inside. Bret works on the leg, which sends Vince outside again. This time he comes back in with tire iron but Bret knocks it away again and takes it away. Bret hammers away with the tire iron…and then does it some more…and more, to the point where unless Bret has the strength of a two year old, Vince should be in a coma.

The Sharpshooter is teased but Bret lets it go so he can use the tire iron again. Some low blows have Vince down again and let’s get a chair in there too. Bret sits down and then hits some hard chair shots to Vince’s back. The chair is bent up so Bret finally (and I do mean finally) grabs the Sharpshooter for the win at 11:08.

Rating: C. Ok so I’ve called this an A+ before because I love what they did with Vince being absolutely destroyed and not getting in a single bit of offense. This was never supposed to be anything but a massacre until the Sharpshooter…but my goodness how long did they go with the tire iron/chair shots? The thing here is that this is really only a match in name only so I’m not going to call it bad, but Bret couldn’t have mixed it up with some different stuff other than hitting him over and over with the same stuff?

A big Hart celebration ensues.

Wrestlemania XXVII is coming to Atlanta, Georgia.

Official attendance: 72,219.

We recap Chris Jericho vs. Edge for the Smackdown World Title. They were partners last year but Edge tore his Achilles. Edge came back at the Royal Rumble (at #29 in a great surprise) and won, setting up his title shot here. For some reason the build for this match involved Edge saying “spear” over and over until it lost all meaning.

Smackdown World Title: Edge vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho is defending. They start slowly with Jericho grabbing a headlock (Jericho: “Ask him!”) but Edge is right back with some running shoulders. Jericho is back with some stompings in the corner before sending Edge outside. That’s good for a long count before Edge comes back in and gets chinlocked. Jericho slowly stomps and slaps away, which takes long enough that Edge manages to send him shoulder first into the post.

A running shoulder sends Jericho into the announcers’ table and there’s a clothesline off the apron. They head back inside and hopefully pick up the energy a bit here. Back in and Edge gets two off a super gordbuster, followed by a middle rope sunset flip for the same. Jericho goes simple by kicking him in the head but the Codebreaker is blocked. The spear is countered into a quick Walls but Edge slips out.

The Lionsault misses and Edge is right back up with the Edge O Matic for two. Jericho’s enziguri gets two more but so does the Impaler as things slow back down a bit. Jericho mixes things up a bit with a middle rope forearm to the back of the head (Edge was nice enough to look over his shoulder before Jericho jumped), only to have his own spear cut off by a big boot.

The real spear is countered into a Codebreaker for a rather delayed two. Jericho starts going after the ankle before switching to the Walls. We’ll make that a half Walls to stay on the bad ankle but the rope is grabbed. Edge’s rollup for two is also grabbed and they crash out to the floor for a breather. The frustrated Jericho grabs the belt and the referee gets distracted, allowing Jericho’s belt shot to get two. The Codebreaker to a limping Edge retains the title at 15:47.

Rating: B. This was good but it never hit that next level and it made things kind of disappointing. Edge only teased the spear once and never got a big near fall. I was expecting something a lot more epic than we got here and that just didn’t happen. There were some shenanigans due to the belt shot but this needed to be more intense and violent given what Edge was saying coming in.

Post match Jericho goes after Edge again but Edge hits a spear off the announcers’ table and through the barricade as the feud must continue.

We look at the pre-show battle royal.

Alicia Fox/Laycool/Maryse/Vickie Guerrero vs. Beth Phoenix/Eve Torres/Gail Kim/Kelly Kelly/Mickie James

Get the women on the show special. Vickie bumps Gail to start and turns around to pose, only to run into Phoenix. The non-Vickie team takes turns beating on Vickie in the corner, who asks if Kelly knows who she is. That earns Vickie a kick to the ribs with McCool making the save. Everything breaks down and we hit the parade of finishers, leaving Vickie crying in the corner as Beth comes up behind her. McCool makes another save and the Hog Splash (Cole’s name) finishes Kelly at 3:29.

Rating: D. Oh what else were you expecting here? A bunch of the people barely did anything, there were a bunch of Vickie fat jokes, Lawler drooled over most of them and Striker continues to try to make everything sound like the most important moment ever because it gets people paying attention to him. Terrible match and little more than a way for Vickie to keep her heat.

We recap John Cena challenging Batista for the Raw World Title. Cena got the title back in the Elimination Chamber but Vince McMahon allowed Batista an immediate title shot. Now it’s time for the fair rematch, with Batista talking about being tired of Cena being the star when they got big at the same time. You can pretty much ignore all of those details though and just go with “It’s John Cena vs. Batista for the WWE Title at Wrestlemania.”

Raw World Title: Batista vs. John Cena

Batista is defending and Cena’s big entrance is from the United States Air Force Honor Guard Drill Team. We get the Big Match Intros before they fight over a lockup. Batista grabs a headlock before running Cena over, only to have Cena come back with a headlock of his own. That’s broken up and Batista sends him hard into the corner for the running clothesline to the back of the head.

Some cranking on the neck has Cena down but he manages a release suplex (that didn’t look great) and the bulldog connects for two. It’s way too early for the AA though as Batista reverses into a DDT for two of his own. A chinlock with a bodyscissors keeps Cena down for a bit, only to have him power up and start slugging away. Batista sticks with what has been working by grabbing a neckbreaker for two more.

The front chancery keeps Cena in trouble until he powers up again. The STF goes on out of nowhere but Batista grabs the rope like a bad villain should. Batista is fine enough to hit a spear for two before loading Cena up top. The superplex attempt is blocked and Cena hits a super Five Knuckle Shuffle of all things.

Batista gets back up and hits his namesake Bomb for two, giving us a great shocked face. Back up Cena counters another Batista Bomb into the AA (toss variation) for two, leaving them both down. Cena goes up but dives into a spinebuster (how Batista injured Cena’s neck a few years ago), only to have the Batista Bomb reversed into the STF (with Cena giving him a LONG talk) for the tap at 13:29.

Rating: B. It’s good and they were getting to the big stuff but I was expecting longer than just shy of fourteen minutes. Cena getting the title back is the right way to go for him though as he can put someone else over rather soon. Batista was not quite what he used to be but these two instantly make for an epic feel. Not a classic match, though they didn’t do anything wrong with the setup and finish going rather well.

Cena poses with a guy in a WE HATE CENA shirt for a funny moment.

We recap Shawn Michaels vs. Undertaker. Shawn lost to him the previous year before, leaving Shawn obsessed with having to get the win. It is so big that Shawn is willing to put his career on the line against the Streak, saying he doesn’t have a career if he can’t beat the Undertaker. Not that it matters as this feels absolutely huge and you know it’s going to go well.

Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels

No DQ. The entrances are absolutely epic and you know that you’re about to see something special. They also take their sweet time getting to the ring and it builds up even more, with Shawn staring at Undertaker the entire way to the ring. Undertaker charges at him to start but Shawn is right there with the chops. Shawn gets flipped into the corner, setting up Snake Eyes into the big boot.

Old School connects but Undertaker comes up limping a bit. The chokeslam is loaded up but the knee gives out, with Shawn wisely kicking away at the leg. The Tombstone is broken up as well so Shawn starts in on the shoulder, which is a bit of an odd choice given UNDERTAKER IS LIMPING.

Undertaker slips out but has to block a quick superkick attempt as things reset a bit. The logic kicks in as Shawn starts going after the knee in the corner but Undertaker clotheslines him to the floor. The Taker Dive is loaded up but Shawn comes back in to take out the knee in a rather smart move. It’s too early for the Figure Four and they head outside, where Shawn is rammed back first into the post. The apron legdrop connects but Shawn goes after the leg again to take over.

Now the Figure Four goes on until Undertaker sits up. Shawn: “No.” And Undertaker goes back down. Well that was polite of him. Undertaker turns it over so Shawn wisely lets go and they take a breather. Back up and they strike it out until Undertaker grabs a quick chokeslam for two. The Tombstone is escaped again though and Shawn grabs the ankle lock, complete with a grapevine.

Undertaker finally uses the good leg to kick his way to freedom so Shawn sends him outside. A springboard spinning crossbody is pulled out of the air so Undertaker hit the Tombstone on the floor to knock Shawn silly. Medics come out to check on Shawn but Undertaker isn’t having that and throws him back inside for two, meaning frustration is setting in. This might have more of an impact if MATT STRIKER WOULD SHUT UP for once, but instead he needs to keep shouting what he thinks sound like highlight reel worthy lines.

The Last Ride is loaded up but Undertaker’s knee gives out and they crash down, with Shawn getting two off a faceplant. Shawn’s top rope elbow only hits raised knees, which have Undertaker in even more pain. Hell’s Gate goes on but Shawn flips over into a rollup for two. Shawn hits a quick Sweet Chin Music out of nowhere for two but another attempt is countered into a heck of a Last Ride for two more.

They go outside and it’s time to load up the announcers’ table. That takes too long though and it’s a superkick to knock Undertaker onto the table instead. In something that couldn’t possibly go wrong, Shawn goes up and moonsaults down onto Undertaker, mostly hitting his feet/lower legs, which does tie into everything so far. Shawn realizes he has a chance and throws Undertaker inside and hits a clean Sweet Chin Music (that has to be the fourth or fifth) for two, with Cole telegraphing the kickout by screaming that Streak was over.

Another superkick is countered into a chokeslam but Undertaker can barely move, let alone cover. Instead it’s a Tombstone (with tongue) for two and we get another stunned face. Shawn can’t get up so Undertaker loads up the throat slit….but stops. Undertaker tells him to stay down as Shawn pulls himself up and then slaps Undertaker in the face, admitting that he can’t do it and basically telling Undertaker to finish him off. The jumping Tombstone does just that at 24:00.

Rating: A+. What do you want me to say here? This is an absolute masterpiece and one of the best matches either of them have ever had if not their best ever. The leg stuff played a role throughout until Shawn gave it everything he had but just couldn’t do it in the end. It told an amazing story with some great action, including multiple near falls where you could buy it being over. It’s better than I remember it being and one of the best main events in Wrestlemania history.

Undertaker needs the ropes to get to his feet and Shawn finally gets up. Undertaker says something to him we can’t see and they hug before Undertaker leaves him alone in the ring. Shawn gets to soak in the THANK YOU SHAWN chants before doing the long walk up the ramp. Shawn: “I’m gonna drive my kids crazy in three weeks!” He looks back again and walks off to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. This is a weird show as there isn’t much that is Wrestlemania worthy. Edge vs. Jericho is just good, Money in the Bank is its usual ok self, HHH vs. Sheamus is a slightly above average power brawl and Batista vs. Cena wasn’t even fifteen minutes long. Those are the high points though, as the rest of the show is pretty much mediocre/forgettable to bad. That doesn’t make for a great Wrestlemania, but this show is usually pretty well remembered.

That’s because of the main event and my goodness does it deserve the praise it receives. I’ve seen it a few times now and it pulled me in again with how epic of a showdown they were having here. It felt like a Wrestlemania main event match and you do not get those very often. That match alone makes this Wrestlemania worth seeing, though I would definitely recommend fast forwarding a good bit of the midcard, as it was quite the miss in multiple places.

Ratings Comparison

Battle Royal

Original: N/A
2013 Redo: N/A
2015 Redo: D+
2024 Redo: C

Awesome Truth vs. ShoMiz

Original: D
2013 Redo: D+
2015 Redo: D
2024 Redo: C-

Randy Orton vs. Ted DiBiase vs. Cody Rhodes

Original: D+
2013 Redo: C
2015 Redo: C
2024 Redo: C+

Christian vs. Matt Hardy vs. Kane vs. Jack Swagger vs. Kofi Kingston vs. Drew McIntyre vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. MVP vs. Evan Bourne

Original: B
2013 Redo: C+
2015 Redo: C+
2024 Redo: B-

HHH vs. Sheamus

Original: B-
2013 Redo: C+
2015 Redo: C+
2024 Redo: B-

CM Punk vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: B-
2013 Redo: C
2015 Redo: C
2024 Redo: C+

Mr. McMahon vs. Bret Hart

Original: A+
2013 Redo: A+
2015 Redo: A
2024 Redo: C

Edge vs. Chris Jericho

Original: A-
2013 Redo: B
2015 Redo: B-
2024 Redo: B

Beth Phoenix/Kevin Kelly/Mickie James/Gail Kim/Eve Torres vs. Vickie Guerrero/Alicia Fox/Laycool/Maryse

Original: F
2013 Redo: D
2015 Redo: D
2024 Redo: D

John Cena vs. Batista

Original: A
2013 Redo: B+
2015 Redo: B+
2024 Redo: B

Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: A+
2013 Redo: A+
2015 Redo: A
2024 Redo: A+

Overall Rating

Original: A
2013 Redo: B+
2015 Redo: A-
2024 Redo: B-

That’s quite a drop for the overall rating but some of the lower matches just don’t hold up as well.

 

 

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ECW On Sci Fi
Date: October 7, 2008
Location: Spokane Arena, Spokane, Washington
Commentators: Todd Grisham, Matt Striker

We’re done with No Mercy and Matt Hardy is still the ECW Champion, having survived Mark Henry. The following night didn’t go so well for Hardy, who was pinned by Kane in a tag match on Raw. That could open up a few different options and we could be seeing more of Kane around here. Or it means nothing. Let’s get to it.

Here is No Mercy if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Finlay/Tommy Dreamer vs. Mike Knox/Jack Swagger

Hornswoggle is here too. Finlay and Knox start things off with Finlay going straight to the elbow to the head. The running seated senton allows the tag off to Dreamer and a bulldog drops Knox again. Swagger gets knocked to the floor for a clothesline from the apron but Knox is back up with a pump kick.

We take a break and come back with Knox’s suplex getting two on Dreamer and a cheap shot knocking Finlay off the apron. Swagger comes in and misses the Vader Bomb, meaning Dreamer can come in to clean house. Everything breaks down and it’s a Tadpole Splash into a shillelagh shot to give Finlay the pin on Knox.

Rating: C+. Totally standard tag match here and that’s a fine way to go. Well, as far as you could get with Knox involved. He’s just turned into such a nothing name around here but the show is in such a need for bodies that he has to stick around. Finlay is also fine for a midcard name and that’s all he needs to be, making him a fine example of how to use a veteran of his status.

It’s October so Tiffany is a devil and Teddy Long is a vampire (I think). Jamie Noble comes in and says he’s dressed as the greatest wrestler of all time. Tiffany: “You’re dressed as Shawn Michaels!” Anyway Tony Atlas and Mark Henry interrupt, with Noble making the mistake of standing up to Henry. A match is made.

The Boogeyman is coming back. Uh…good? I think? They need people, but I’m not sure how far he’ll get them.

Mark Henry vs. Jamie Noble

Henry runs him over to start and steps on his back for some loud screaming. Another knockdown has Noble in more trouble but he avoids a charge in the corner. The right hands in the corner look to set up a high crossbody, which is pulled into the World’s Strongest Slam to give Henry the pin.

Rating: C. Just a squash here as we establish that Henry is in fact still a monster. That was pretty much covered last night on Raw but they needed to do it here as well. Thankfully it didn’t last long, as there was no reason for it to go more than a few minutes. Henry knows how to smash through people and he did it well here.

Post match the beatdown stays on so Matt Hardy runs in with a Twist Of Fate. Unfortunately it’s to Tony Atlas, leaving Henry to wreck Hardy.

Raw Rebound.

CM Punk/Ricky Ortiz/Kofi Kingston/Evan Bourne vs. Miz/John Morrison/Cody Rhodes/Ted DiBiase Jr.

Manu is here with the villains. Rhodes and Bourne start things going as Striker actually explains the rules of an eight man tag. I…sure why not, as it’s not hurting anything. Bourne starts in on the arm and it’s quickly off to Punk to stay on said arm. Morrison comes in and gets taken into the corner, where Ortiz drops a leg. It’s back to Bourne for a running hurricanrana and the villains are cleared out as we take a break.

We come back with DiBiase chinlocking Bourne, apparently thanks to Manu interfering during the break (he has to do something). A big clothesline cuts off Bourne’s comeback and Morrison comes in for the armbar. Miz grabs a cravate and the rapid fire tags continue with Rhodes hammering away.

It’s already back to Miz for a front facelock, with Bourne reversing into a small package for two. Bourne is up without much trouble though and Punk comes back in to strike away. Everything breaks down (yep) and it’s time for the series of dives. Manu’s distraction saves Morrison from the GTS though and DiBiase knocks Punk into the Moonlight Drive to give Morrison the pin.

Rating: B-. The rapid fire tags helped a bit here as it let the people get in there rather than waiting around as much. At the same time, the less Ortiz does the better, as there is just nothing there. I know he has the big hair and the towel and all that, but that’s not enough to carry him. Hopefully WWE realizes that soon, as it’s getting harder to put up with him. Finally, my goodness Punk has fallen rather quickly after losing the World Title, which tends to be the case too often with MITB title winners.

Overall Rating: C+. ECW continues to exist, with the title feud kind of on hold this week and guest stars being there to fill in the gaps. As usual, I’m not sure how much this needs to be a regular hour long show, but WWE has done dumber things before. The main event was ok, though it’s not worth going out of your way to see. Just wait for Smackdown, as is often the case around here.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw
Date: January 11, 2010
Location: Target Center, Minneapolis, Minnesota
Attendance: 8,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

The previous week’s show is the famous one with the return of Bret Hart but someone wanted to see how the follow up went. That’s a rather interesting way to go and I’m curious to look back at what happened. In this case we have the build to the Royal Rumble, with only a few weeks left before the show. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence. Let’s burn it to the ground.

Here is guest host (oh yeah that’s a thing) Mike Tyson to get things going. Tyson is glad to be back and of course we flash back to the legendary moment with Steve Austin in 1998. Back in the arena, here is World Champion Sheamus to interrupt. Sheamus doesn’t like all the praise that Tyson is getting and calls him a washed up former champion. Tyson teases getting physical and Sheamus backs up.

Cue Randy Orton to interrupt, saying he isn’t interested in making a SportsCenter moment, but he does want the WWE Championship. He wants to face Sheamus at the Royal Rumble, but here is John Cena to interrupt. Sheamus asks why Cena is here and it’s…well he wants to meet Mike Tyson! Cena talks about having beaten everyone here, including Tyson…..in Punch Out! And yes we get a King Hippo reference.

Cena wants a title shot but here is Kofi Kingston to interrupt. Orton isn’t sure why he’s here, as he beat Kingston last week. Kingston points out that he has never gotten a title shot (somehow true) and he won’t take no for an answer. Sheamus says Tyson got long stretches between his title defenses so he wants the Royal Rumble off.

Tyson says unlike Sheamus, he never ducked a fight in his life. Instead Tyson makes a triple threat for the title shot later tonight, with Cena saying it’s him against Bald Bull and Von Kaiser for a shot at Soda Popinski. The fact that he didn’t refer to Orton, who is BALD, as Bald Bull, takes some points away but the Punch Out references were funny.

Divas Title Tournament First Round: Alicia Fox vs. Kelly Kelly

Melina is injured so the title is vacant. Fox knees her in the chest to start and we’re already in the chinlock. Kelly gets up and knocks her out to the floor for a clothesline from the apron. The rather screamy headscissors drops Fox but she counters the hurricanrana into a powerbomb (nasty one too) for the pin to advance. This was a good example of women not getting the chance to do anything other than a few quick moves.

John Cena was the Grand Marshall of the Fiesta Bowl.  Apparently he’s a great guy.

Here is Legacy for a chat before their match. Last year they were in the final four of the Royal Rumble and Cody Rhodes thinks it’s his turn to win the Royal Rumble. DiBiase talks about being a movie star with the Marine 2 being better than the original in every way. Rhodes says a video of him in fifth grade is better than the Marine so it doesn’t prove much. They both think they’re going to win the Royal Rumble. The fact that Rhodes would is kind of astounding.

Legacy vs. Mark Henry/Evan Bourne

Bourne hurricanranas DiBiase to start fast but gets sent crashing out to the floor. Rhodes gets in a cheap shot by sending him into the barricade and the chinlock goes on back inside. It’s off to Rhodes for a knee drop as commentary ignores the boring match to talk about the Rumble, with Lawler actually giving some straight insight for a change. Bourne fights up and brings in Henry (who is huge here, even by his standards). DiBiase breaks up Air Bourne and Henry gets low bridged to the floor, meaning it’s Cross Rhodes to finish Bourne.

Rating: C. This was a bad time for Henry’s career as he was just doing nothing for such a long stretch. He was given random partners like Bourne and it was clear that there was no long term plan for him. It didn’t help that he was so big, but once he slimmed down a bit and started being a monster (which took some time), it was a lot better. As for the match, it was little more than a squash, with Bourne not being able to do much against the rapidly improving Legacy.

D-Generation X is in the back, with Shawn Michaels saying he’s ok with making peace with Bret Hart last week, but Mike Tyson is a different story. That being said, he’s seen Tyson’s documentary and he thinks Tyson is a changed man. Now he’s going to prove it.

Post break, Michaels goes to see Tyson and forgives him for the WrestleMania XIV knockout. Tyson doesn’t need his forgiveness and is willing to do it again. Chris Jericho comes in and apparently he and Tyson are friends so tonight it’s Jericho/Tyson vs. DX and if Jericho wins, he can stay on Raw (or anywhere he likes). Michaels is ready for revenge. Right.

We look back at Bret Hart’s return to Raw last week, with Hart’s “Well, I guess h*** froze over” summing it up perfectly. He and Vince McMahon are still having issues though, including McMahon kicking him low.

Here is Jack Swagger, who says he’s going to win the Royal Rumble. Tonight, he wants an Over The Top match and it’s open challenge time.

Jack Swagger vs. Santino Marella

You throw your opponent over the top to win and Marella is ready to drop Swagger like a bicycle with no kickstand. Marella strikes away and gets driven into the corner, followed by a takedown. Swagger goes to toss him but of course gets eliminated in less than a minute.

Randy Orton vs. Kofi Kingston vs. John Cena

For the Royal Rumble title shot against Sheamus. Cena and Kingston form a slightly awkward alliance to start, with a double suplex dropping Orton. A release fisherman’s suplex does it again and a double back elbow drops Orton as well. That leaves us with Cena vs. Kingston (who somehow never had a singles match) as Sheamus comes out to watch. Orton sneaks back in to break that up and we take a break.

We come back with Orton chinlocking Kingston (shocking I know) before switching over to Cena for the hanging DDT. Orton gives Kingston the backbreaker but gets bulldogged by Cena, which Cole says is him “rolling”. The STF has Kingston in trouble until Orton makes a quick save. Trouble In Paradise sends Cena outside, where Cody Rhodes runs out to send him into the steps. The distraction lets Ted DiBiase deck Kingston and the RKO sends Orton to the Rumble.

Rating: B-. Pretty standard match here and that’s a perfectly fine way to go. If nothing else, it was interesting to see Cena vs. Kingston, though Orton winning makes the most sense. Sheamus needs some wins to establish himself as champion and beating Orton is almost a merit badge. You certainly don’t want to do the Edge thing from 2006 again so this makes sense.

Mike Tyson is asked about his match against DX, when DX member Hornswoggle interrupts. Tyson threatens to do various violent things to Hornswoggle, including reaching into his head, pulling out his brain, putting it into a newspaper and smashing it like Silly Putty. Well that sounds uncalled for.

We look back at MVP wanting the Miz’s US Title.

Miz is standing outside of the locker room and talks about being thrown out when he ate some chicken over a wrestler’s bag. For six months he had to change and shower elsewhere while people like JBL made fun of him. Now he has his own locker room, while people like MVP have to dress with everyone else. He heads into the arena and says MVP doesn’t deserve to be in this ring, because MVP should be in jail.

Miz would rather the fans boo him for being something he is than cheer him for something he isn’t. MVP comes out here with his diamonds but even if you put diamonds on a dog, it’s still a mutt. Or it’s Diamond Dog from Con Air. Miz hits the catchphrase but here is MVP to say he has never hidden from his past, but rather he embraces it. Yes he is proud of his ability to earn the finer things in life, just like he is proud to win the respect of these fans. He is no mutt but asks Miz to stand there for a moment and suck.

The jacket comes off and MVP talks about his time in a Florida prison. Their real worlds are worlds apart so open up his cage and see how tame this tiger really is. Miz teases swinging and gets beaten down in a hurry. Pretty awesome stuff here, with Miz’s promo being great but MVP brought the fire when he got his chance.

We look at last year’s Hall Of Fame induction ceremony, headlined by Steve Austin.

We look back at Mike Tyson knocking out Shawn Michaels at WrestleMania XIV.

Divas Title Tournament First Round: Eve Torres vs. Katie Lea Burchill

Maryse (facing the winner in the second round) is on commentary and thinks Miz is in love with her (she’s smart). Burchill grabs an early chinlock and a backbreaker but Lawler would rather talk about how nice Maryse smells. Another backbreaker gets two on Torres…and she rolls Burchill up for the pin. This was nothing.

Carlito hits on Gail Kim but they’re shut down by a ticked off Vince McMahon.

Royal Rumble rundown. All one match.

Here is Vince McMahon for a chat. Apparently Bret Hart isn’t here due to fear, because McMahon never gives up. Hart is never going to be seen here again because he isn’t getting closure. The end. Lawler: “Is that it?”

D-Generation X vs. Mike Tyson/Chris Jericho

DX’s Tag Team Titles aren’t on the line. Before the match, Michaels says he wants an answer from Undertaker about the Wrestlemania rematch. Tyson and Michaels start things off with Tyson hitting a shoulder, meaning it’s off to HHH. They trade some shoves, with Tyson sending him into the corner and it’s off to Jericho to stomp away.

The jumping knee gets HHH out of trouble and it’s back to Michaels for two off a sunset flip. Jericho is back with the jumping enziguri and Tyson comes back in…as we have Hornswoggle in boxing gear. That brings Jericho back in…and Tyson reveals the DX shirt that you knew was coming. Tyson knocks Jericho out and Michaels gets the pin.

Rating: C. This was harmless fun and that’s not a bad thing. Jericho getting caught when he thought he was all brilliant and ahead of DX was a great moment and it all worked well. I had fun with this one and the whole thing wound up being rather entertaining. It was barely a match, but it wasn’t supposed to be anything else.

A lot of posing ends the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The promos carried this show as there certainly wasn’t much in the way of wrestling. Honestly there wasn’t much in the way of anything and that made for a pretty mediocre show. I liked the Tyson “swerve” at the end and the Miz/MVP promo was good, but there’s a reason this isn’t the most fondly remembered time in company history. The show was ok, but that’s about it.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter and Bluesky @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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ECW On Sci Fi
Date: September 30, 2008
Location: Resch Center, Green Bay, Wisconsin
Commentators: Todd Grisham, Matt Striker

It’s the last show before No Mercy and that means we’re coming up on the Matt Hardy vs. Mark Henry ECW Title match. That’s the biggest story around here, as tends to be the case, though thankfully some of the other stories have gotten a bit of time. Hopefully it’s enough to get through the show so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Tiffany and Teddy Long are in the ring to start us off with the former bringing in ECW Champion Matt Hardy and Mark Henry (with Tony Atlas) for a chat. Henry says Hardy has a bad week coming up, as he has Henry on Sunday and a triple threat match with HHH and Chris Jericho.

Hardy says he’ll do just fine in that match, but Henry says Hardy shouldn’t be in it in the first place. No one ever beat Henry for the title, but Hardy says the title is about the fans and representing ECW as the best it has to offer. A fight is teased but here are Miz and John Morrison to interrupt. They want a match with Evan Bourne and Ricky Ortiz, but instead Long puts them with Henry against Hardy, Bourne and Ortiz. That’s….not a very good main event.

Jack Swagger vs. Lenny Lane

That would be the Lenny Lane from WCW and my goodness he’s almost unrecognizable here, as he’s put on quite a bit of weight. Swagger wrestles him down to start and hits a gutbuster. The gutwrench powerbomb finishes Lane in a hurry.

Post match the beatdown stays on but Tommy Dreamer runs in for the save.

Tommy Dreamer vs. Mike Knox

Knox knocks (hey…) him into the corner to start but charges into an elbow in the corner. Dreamer gets knocked out of the air though and a suplex puts him down again. Grisham: “These two are almost mirror images of each other.” I have no idea what he’s talking about so we’ll go with Striker explaining the physics of a chinlock. A drop toehold sends Knox face first into the buckle but Dreamer gets sent into the post as well. The spinning Downward Spiral finishes Dreamer off.

Rating: C-. This was in fact Knox beating up Dreamer and then pinning him with his finisher. In theory Dreamer is next for Jack Swagger and I have no idea why I would want to see him face Swagger after this loss. What are we measuring? Whether Swagger or Knox can beat him up worse?

Post match Swagger comes back out and gives Dreamer the gutwrench powerbomb. Again: just after he lost a match. Why is this interesting?

Video on the special broadcast edition of Wrestlemania XXIV. Saliva’s Ladies And Gentlemen is surprisingly left in as we look at the history of Wrestlemania. I know it’s for something airing that week, but this feels so out of place in September.

No Mercy rundown.

Miz/John Morrison/Mark Henry vs. Evan Bourne/Ricky Ortiz/Matt Hardy

Miz knocks Bourne down to start, only to get caught with a spinwheel kick. Ortiz comes in and suplexes Miz, who manages to take him into the corner as Striker goes on some rant about inflation at Starbucks. Morrison comes in and gets sent into the corner, where Ortiz pulls him head over heels for a faceplant and a near fall. It’s back to Bourne, who gets knocked down again and we hit the chinlock.

Morrison kicks him in the face again and it’s back to Miz to choke on the ropes. Bourne fights out of trouble without much difficulty and brings Hardy in to pick up the pace. Henry comes in and stares down all three of them as we take a break. We come back with Hardy working on Morrison’s arm before Ortiz gets to do the same. Bourne comes in and goes after the arm as well but Morrison is able to get over to Henry. Destruction ensues quickly, with Henry running Ortiz over and pounding him on the ropes.

It’s already back to Miz for a cravate, which Ortiz reverses into a sunset flip for two. Morrison is back in with a headscissors, which is finally reversed into an electric chair. The tag attempt is cut off by Miz but Ortiz gets over to Bourne, who grabs a slingshot hurricanrana. Bourne’s top rope Meteora gets two on Morrison as everything breaks down. Bourne kicks at Henry but gets caught in the World’s Strongest Slam for the pin.

Rating: C-. The match didn’t sound interesting when it was announced and then it was just as dull as it sounded it was going to be. A lot of that comes down to Ortiz, who has felt wedged into just about everything he’s done. He’s not interesting or particularly good and having him in the main event, even as part of a six man tag, is going to drag it down. The rest of the match wasn’t much better, but at least they felt like they belonged there.

Overall Rating: D. It’s a bad sign when the best thing on the show was a Swagger squash which only went about a minute and a half. Other than that you had the rather insane booking with Dreamer and then the dull main event. This isn’t a one story show, but when the main story is almost all that matters and nothing is particularly good, it makes for a rough sit, which was the case here. Bad show here, and I’m scared of how much worse it’s going to get.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw
Date: September 29, 2008
Location: Target Center, Minneapolis, Minnesota
Attendance: 7,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

It’s the last Raw before No Mercy and hopefully that means a lot more from Chris Jericho and Shawn Michaels. The two of them have done some great stuff lately and are carrying the show on their backs. That’s about all there is going on around here and that can make for a tedious watch. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Batista vs. Santino Marella

Non-title and Beth Phoenix is here with Marella. Before the match, Marella wants the Honk-A-Meter, which shows that he’s 58 weeks behind Honky Tonk Man’s record. He also has the Brain Barometer, which shows he has ten trillion brain cells compared to Batista’s 12. Shoulders in the corner, spinebuster, Batista Bomb finish in less than a minute.

Post match Batista yells at Phoenix but JBL runs in to give him the Clothesline.

Shawn Michaels, who is teaming with a mystery partner tonight, says Chris Jericho has six days left to be World Heavyweight Champion. As for tonight, how about he teams up with a Real American? A Texas Rattlesnake? Or the Best There Is, The Best There Was And The Best There Ever Will Be? Ok Michaels knows that last one is too far so he’ll settle for someone who likes him.

Miz vs. JTG

Their respective partners are here too. After a quick look at the Dirt Sheet, which featured an interview with Cryme Tyme’s “parents”, Miz drives JTG into the corner to start but gets cut off by a flying shoulder. An uppercut staggers Miz again but he’s back with the running corner clothesline. A regular clothesline drops JTG again, though he’s right back with a jumping over the back Fameasser for two. John Morrison offers a distraction so Shad Gaspard cuts him off, which allows Miz to grab the Reality Check for the pin.

Rating: C. Miz is at the point where he just needs reps, as he’s so young in his career. The good thing is that you can see the development coming along each week, as he’s having competent matches. That’s a long way to come in such a short amount of time and his chemistry with Morrison makes it even better.

Jamie Noble goes up to Jillian Hall and insults her singing before asking “sweet cheeks” to be his partner tonight. She sings a no but gets to meet Dolph Ziggler, who doesn’t impress her.

Paul Burchill/Katie Lea vs. Jamie Noble/???

William Regal and Layla come out to watch and Noble actually has a partner in the form of….Mickie James. Yeah that works. Burchill hammers Noble down to start and hands it off to Katie, who can beat on Noble as well as this is an intergender match. That doesn’t last long as James comes in and gets caught with a double arm crank. James fights up just as quickly and hands it back to Noble, who shouts at Regal before missile dropkicking Burchill. A cross armbreaker gives Noble the fast submission.

Rating: C. The ending was a nice surprise as Noble seems to be turning to the good side. Granted he needs to work on his ability to speak to others but at least the stuff in the ring is working. The cross armbreaker is a good addition, as it certainly looks devastating enough. I can’t imagine he survives the showdown with Regal, but at least Noble is doing something well.

Cody Rhodes, Ted DiBiase and Manu find Kane (their partner tonight), with Rhodes saying that since Kane is Paul Bearer’s son, he’s basically a second generation star. That means they can work together, but Kane would rather massacre Rey Mysterio no matter who is on his side. Stay out of his way or he’ll end all of them.

We look back at last week, when Lance Cade beat Shawn Michaels, albeit thanks to a Chris Jericho distraction.

Here is Cade to brag about his win and say that Jericho is just better than Michaels. He doesn’t care who Michaels has as a partner tonight either.

Cody Rhodes/Ted DiBiase/Manu/Kane vs. CM Punk/Kofi Kingston/Rey Mysterio/Evan Bourne

Manu elbows Bourne in the face to start but Bourne slips out of a suplex attempt and brings in Mysterio. Everything breaks down early, with Punk and Kingston hitting stereo dives, followed by another dive from Mysterio as we take an early break. We come back with Bourne fighting out of Rhodes’ chinlock but Manu is in to keep Bourne down. That doesn’t last long though as Bourne is up for the tag off to Punk, who comes in with a clothesline.

Rhodes takes him down to start in on the knee though, with Kane coming in to just stomp on him. DiBiase, who seems to get the idea of a game plan, is back on the leg, followed by Rhodes doing the same. Kane comes in and gets enziguried but boots Mysterio off the apron. It doesn’t make much of a difference though as it’s Kingston getting the tag to start cleaning house. Kingston dives at Kane though and gets caught in the chokeslam for the fast pin.

Rating: C+. Pretty basic match here but it’s nice to see Kane going into monster mode to win in the end. He knows how to do that style well enough and Kingston is expendable enough to take a loss. That’s the point in putting so many people in this match as it gave them some options for taking the fall and it went well enough.

Here is Mike Adamle for a chat. Earlier tonight, Kane requested something from him and since he won, he gets his request: if Kane wins at No Mercy, Rey Mysterio will have to unmask. This brings out Randy Orton of all people to interrupt and he mocks Adamle for being Shane McMahon’s lackey. Adamle needs to re-suspend CM Punk right now because the reality is Adamle needs Orton on his side. He’s going to wreck everyone when he gets back but here is JBL to interrupt.

JBL complains about losing money on his stock market this week but he has a lot to lose. Then he’ll become #1 contender at No Mercy and move on to win the World Title. Orton is always living in the past because he’s the hottest commodity since ethanol. Cue Batista behind JBL, who realizes what’s waiting on him and turns around to eat the spear (well that was dumb). Batista promises to make JBL’s week worse at No Mercy.

Santino Marella is on the phone and gets nervous when he runs into Beth Phoenix. Apparently it was a sick kid named uh, Frankie! Phoenix doesn’t want him out there with her this week because she’s bad luck. Marella says it’s a good thing he doesn’t have a Moolah Meter, because Phoenix is trailing Moolah by about twenty two years. Phoenix is annoyed and leaves, with Marella thinking it was a “female problem”.

Kelly Kelly/Candice Michelle vs. Beth Phoenix/Jillian Hall

Phoenix and Michelle start things off but Kelly quickly comes in for a double dropkick. It’s off to Hall, who manages to pull Michelle face first down in the corner. Phoenix’s backbreaker gets two and we hit the chinlock for a bit. Hall comes back in and takes too long cartwheeling, allowing Michelle to get her boots up in the corner. It’s back to Kelly for the screaming headscissors as everything breaks down. Kelly’s rollup (how she won last week) is countered into the Glam Slam for the dominant pin.

Rating: C+. They did well enough here as you can tell the women are working hard to improve. It’s still not exactly great, but they’re looking confident in the stuff they’re doing. Phoenix is of course still miles ahead of the other three, but at least she’s getting something a bit better to work with over time. Nice quick match here.

Deuce vs. Great Charli

Runjin Singh is here with Charli, who yells in some mock Punjab about the greatness of…curry. Charli tells Deuce to come at him but the chop doesn’t do much. Instead Deuce knocks him down but dives into a raised boot. Charlie’s wig comes off and a top rope clothesline finishes Deuce quick.

Post match the real Great Khali comes out to wreck Charli.

We hype up the Smackdown move to MyNetworkTV.

No Mercy rundown.

Chris Jericho/Lance Cade vs. Shawn Michaels/???

Before the reveal, Jericho complains about being wished good luck in his match against Michaels at No Mercy because he’s better than Michaels could ever be. We hear about various things Jericho plans on doing to Michaels with the ladder, with Cade using a ladder to demonstrate. After a break, the partner is….HHH. Well who else was it going to be? Funny bit as Michaels runs to the back and comes back out in a DX shirt and hat because he knows his merchandise.

HHH and Jericho start things off with Jericho getting taken down, meaning it’s already off to Cade. That’s fine with HHH, who takes him down in a hurry, allowing the tag to Michaels to go after Jericho. Michaels gets caught in the wrong corner though and Jericho pulls him down into a chinlock. With that not getting him anywhere, Jericho tries and misses the Lionsault, allowing the double tags to HHH and Cade. The spinebuster puts Cade down but Jericho is in with the Codebreaker to HHH. Jericho and Cade beat on Michaels so much that it’s a DQ.

Rating: C+. Well it was going to be this or Cade losing so they didn’t have a ton of options. It’s not like HHH or one of the World Title participants are going to lose less than a week before the pay per view. At least they didn’t let this go long, as there wasn’t much of a point to doing anything beyond what they did here.

Post match Jericho grabs the ladder but HHH is back in with the sledgehammer to Cade so Michaels can splash him off the ladder. DX stands tall to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This show was about getting ready for No Mercy, which, at least on the Raw side, is a one match show. Does anyone really care about Batista vs. JBL for a future title shot? Or pretty much anything else that Raw is offering? There isn’t much you can do to build towards a one match half show but they managed to make it work well enough here. Not a great show, but Jericho and Michaels should be great.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw
Date: September 22, 2008
Location: US Bank Arena, Cincinnati, Ohio
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

We’re coming up on No Mercy, and as has been the case in recent months, Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho is absolutely carrying the show. Now we’re coming up on a ladder match for Jericho’s World Title at the pay per view, which should be a great way to go. As a bonus, this is the 800th episode so expect some celebration. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here is Chris Jericho to get things going, with the World Title above the ring and a ladder between them. Jericho climbs the ladder and sits on top with a smirk before saying Shawn Michaels is trying to rewrite history. Michaels has convinced Mike Adamle to make their match at No Mercy a ladder match. The dumb fans are going along with Michaels’ claims of revolutionizing the ladder match, even though Michaels can lie.

The truth is that Jericho has won a lot more titles and high profile ladder matches than Michaels could ever hope to. At No Mercy, all you’ll see is this, and he pulls the title down. Jericho is going to leave as champion because he’s just too good. Cue Randy Orton of all people to interrupt, saying it doesn’t matter who wins at No Mercy, because they’ll be champion on borrowed time. Jericho threatens to hit him in the mouth, but Orton isn’t worried because he’s still protected, meaning anyone who touches him is suspended. Orton says he gets what he wants, but Jericho says he gets the same and tells Orton to get well soon.

With Jericho done, Orton says he’ll be champion soon and throws the ladder into the aisle. Cue a ticked off CM Punk to go nose to nose with Orton and then hit him in the face. Mike Adamle runs out and suspends him…which brings out Shane McMahon of all people. After the usual dancing, McMahon says Punk gave Orton “a receipt” but he’s here for something else. Punk’s suspension is lifted, though no one can touch Orton going forward. As for tonight, we’ll also have Michaels/Batista vs. JBL/Jericho. For now though, Punk can have a match of his own.

CM Punk vs. Cody Rhodes

They fight over a lockup to start with Rhodes grabbing a headlock, only to get hit in the face and dropped. Rhodes manages to send him outside so Punk fires off a hard kick to the chest. Back in and Punk rolls through a high crossbody for two but gets whipped hard into the corner. Rhodes has to bail out from a GTS attempt though and we take a quick break. We come back with Rhodes working on Punk’s leg, which is reversed into an ankle lock. Rhodes makes the rope so Punk strikes away, followed by the running knee in the corner. The GTS finishes Rhodes off.

Rating: C+. Rhodes is still figuring out the being a top level guy and he has almost no experience in being a singles star either. That being said, it helps to be out there against someone like Punk, who can work well with anyone. That’s what we got here and it made for a nice match as Punk is on his revenge tour against Orton and company.

Post match Ted DiBiase and Manu run in for the beatdown but Kofi Kingston makes the save.

Smackdown Rebound.

Shane McMahon is in Mike Adamle’s office when Kane comes in. Kane wants Rey Mysterio and gets him at No Mercy. That makes Kane laugh, and he tells Shane to say hi to his mom. Adamle doesn’t know the story so Shane explains the whole thing in one of those “this only works in wrestling” moments.

Beth Phoenix, with Santino Marella, yells at Kelly Kelly about laughing at the injured Marella. For some reason Marella mocks Batista, who pops up to scare him off. Phoenix warns Kane not to interfere, or Marella will beat him up.

Here is Santino Marella to announce that he is only 59 weeks behind the Honky Tonk Man’s record…and he’s interrupted by a surprise name.

Santino Marella vs. Deuce

Non-title. Marella says this is what he’ll do to Batista, so watch what he does to Fonzie over here. Deuce hammers away at Marella’s masked face and knocks him down for a quick two. Marella is back up with an accidental headbutt to stagger Deuce and a sunset flip gets the fast pin.

Post match Beth Phoenix comes out to check on Marella.

Rey Mysterio wishes Evan Bourne good luck.

Evan Bourne vs. Kane

Yeah Bourne might need it. Bourne fires off some forearms to start but can only get so far as Kane hits him in the face. A crucifix attempt is cut off with a punch to the face (there’s always something about keeping it that simple) but Bourne avoids a big boot. Bourne sends him outside for a moonsault so Kane drops him with a pop up uppercut. An Oklahoma Stampede of all things drops Bourne and the chokeslam finishes him off.

Rating: C+. That’s all this needed to be as Bourne was able to do his thing for a bit, only to get destroyed by Kane, as he should have been. Kane is warming up by destroying another cruiserweight, but Mysterio is different enough to make it interesting. They were also smart enough to keep it short, which makes this a rather nice piece of business.

Post match Kane stays on Bourne but Mysterio comes out for the save. That means Kane gets to beat him down as well, as a monster tends to do. Kane says Mysterio is just like everyone else.

Jamie Noble asks Shane McMahon for a rematch against William Regal but Dolph Ziggler comes in to introduce himself again. Randy Orton comes in and doesn’t like CM Punk’s suspension being lifted and they compare family histories.

Beth Phoenix vs. Kelly Kelly

Non-title and Santino Marella is here with Phoenix. Kelly gets powered into the corner but comes out working on the arm. A bouncy armdrag out of the corner drops Phoenix, who buckle bombs her right back into the corner. Phoenix works on the arm a bit but Kelly is right back with the clothesline into the middle rope crossbody. Marella’s distraction doesn’t exactly work though as Kelly gets the rollup pin for the upset.

Rating: C. It was more of an angle than a match but what matters is Kelly is feeling like someone who is a bit more than the usual Diva. Both the Raw and Smackdown women have made some strides in recent weeks and it’s nice to see the efforts paying off. We’ll have to see how it goes, but at least they’re actually having serious matches for once. That’s so nice to see after the drek that they had been doing for so long.

Post match the villains go after Kelly but Batista comes out for the save. Marella ACTUALLY HITS him and…well you can probably guess.

We recap the Dirt Sheet (Miz/John Morrison) vs. Word Up (Cryme Tyme) in a battle of web series. Naturally this resulted in Miz and Morrison doing a rap video, because what else could it result in? Morrison: “You’re not street Shad. I met your dad. He wears a sweater vest.” The Dirt Sheet was absolutely hysterical at times and it won here hands down.

Miz/John Morrison vs. Cryme Tyme

Morrison and JTG start things off, with Morrison mocking JTG’s dancing, which is really not that nice. That earns him a right hand, which allows JTG to dance a bit more (as you might have expected). Morrison comes in and gets hit in the face as well, allowing Gaspard to come in and clean house. A big boot drops Miz and JTG drops both villains on the floor as we take a break. We come back with JTG fighting out of an armbar and getting two off a rollup.

Miz is right back with the corner clothesline into the chinlock before pulling JTG into the corner. Morrison takes him down and grabs the chinlock, allowing Cole to talk about how many pyro displays the show has had throughout its history. Is that really supposed to be impressive? I know it’s one of those factoid things, but come on. JTG fights up and dives over for the tag, allowing Gaspard to come in with a powerslam. Everything breaks down and Morrison pulls JTG outside, leaving Miz to roll Gaspard up for two. Gaspard gets two off a suplex, but Morrison kicks him in the back of the head to give Miz the cheating pin.

Rating: C+. They could only do so much here, but at the end of the day, the only thing that mattered here was the pre-match stuff. This is the kind of feud that is going to get over based on everything with the microphones and the wrestling is secondary. That’s a fine way to go and thankfully the match was good enough, even with a kind of weak finish.

Chris Jericho, with Lance Cade, comes in to see Mike Adamle and suggests that Shane McMahon has ulterior motives. He has an idea for the main event, which we don’t get to hear.

No Mercy rundown.

Earlier today, Charlie Haas was at Dave And Busters and did some less than successful versions of Perfect’s sports bits. Ok that’s clever. Oh and get the new Mr. Perfect DVD.

Chris Jericho/John Bradshaw Layfield/Lance Cade vs. Batista/Shawn Michaels

So there’s the idea. Cade and Michaels start things off with Michaels yelling a lot before hammering away in the corner. Michaels pounds him down again but JBL gets in a cheap shot from behind so Jericho can come in to hammer away. A belly to back suplex sets up a chinlock, followed by an enziguri. JBL adds a neckbreaker and we hit the abdominal stretch to keep Michaels in trouble.

Cade comes in to choke in the corner before it’s right back to JBL for a big boot. The fall away slam is countered into a DDT though and they’re both down. The tag brings in Batista to clean house, including a powerslam to Jericho. Michaels comes back in but has to break out of a Walls attempt. Batista spears JBL down on the floor to even things up a bit. Jericho bulldogs Michaels but misses the Lionsault, allowing Michaels to beat on Cade. The threat of the superkick sends Jericho outside but Cade hits a sitout Rock Bottom to pin Michaels.

Rating: B-. This was a pretty standard match and that worked well enough, as it boosts up both matches for No Mercy. There’s something rather nice about putting two stories together into one, especially when they’re pretty much the only things going on with this show. It’s not a good sign when most of the show is in one match, but it got the job done.

Overall Rating: C. The main event summarized the whole show, as Michaels vs. Jericho is the only thing that really matters, with Batista vs. JBL a rather distant second. Shane McMahon being back is a good thing though, as Adamle being around is just so dull. I get that’s the point, but it’s only going to work for so long. Other than that, the only interesting part was the Dirt Sheet, which isn’t even part of the show. Not great stuff overall, but Michaels vs. Jericho certainly is.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter and Bluesky @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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