Impact Wrestling – December 10, 2019: Something About This Week’s Show

IMG Credit: Impact Wrestling

Impact Wrestling
Date: December 10, 2019
Location: Melrose Ballroom, New York City, New York
Commentators: Don Callis, Josh Matthews

We are about a month away from Hard To Kill and Tessa Blanchard is still #1 contender. That being said, tonight is about ECW, with an “Old School” rules match between Rob Van Dam and Rhino. I’m not sure how interesting that is going to be but it should make the live crowd happy. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

Rhino vs. Rob Van Dam

Old School rules with Tommy Dreamer as guest referee and Katie Forbes gyrates a lot during Rob’s entrance. Rhino shoulders him to the floor to start and Rob gets dropped onto the apron for his troubles. A chair to the ribs keeps Rob down but he’s fine enough to pop back up with the Cannonball off the apron.

Back in and Rob’s spinning legdrop gets two so Rhino starts choking with a mop. Rhino sends him face first into an open chair but gets crotched against the chair to stop him cold. Rob teases Rolling Thunder but isn’t giving the fans what they want. Instead he tries the monkey flip onto the chair but gets powerbombed onto it for two instead.

Rob kicks him down instead and the apron legdrop connects. A trashcan and a table are brought in with the can and a chair being wedged into corners. Some kicks set up the missed split legged moonsault and Rhino Gores him through the table. Katie pulls the referee though and Rhino goes head first into the trashcan in the corner. The Five Star finishes Rhino at 11:01.

Rating: C-. They hit each other with weapons and they looked old but they didn’t embarrass themselves, which is more than some people would have done in a match like this. Rob is actually working for me as a heel and Rhino is Rhino, but Dreamer could have been any given human here. Assuming there’s no post match deal, this was a rather unnecessary spot.

Post match Katie dances and Rob kicks Dreamer low.

Sami Callihan announces the Crists for the Tag Team Open. As for Tessa Blanchard, she can fight Mad Man Fulton tonight. Sami can deal with Ken Shamrock himself because Shamrock is old.

ODB is now in the Knockouts Title match at Hard To Kill.

Moose vs. Acey Romero

Moose’s running shoulders bounce off the big man, who drops Moose with a single shoulder of his own. Romero throws him around like he’s not even there and it’s time for a breather on the floor. A dive from Romero sends Moose into the barricade and we take a break. Back with Moose hammering away at the head but Romero scores with some chops. A big crossbody crushes Moose and a spinebuster gets two more.

Moose hits a running dropkick in the corner though and for some reason Romero tries to go to the middle rope. That earns him the swinging chokebomb for two and they chop it out again. The discus lariat is cut off and Romero nails a Pounce to put them both down. A clothesline gives Romero two more but he misses a charge into the corner, setting up No Jackhammer Needed to give Moose the pin at 12:48.

Rating: C. Romero is a great example of someone who shouldn’t be able to do some of these things and then just does them. He’s still relatively limited in what he can do in the ring but he knows how to move his weight around and that can make for some entertaining matches. Not great, but a lot of fun with Moose having to break a sweat to get the win.

James Mitchell shows Susie the building but she wanders off and touches a noose, which gives her flashbacks to Jessika Havok hanging her. Mitchell warns her about Rosemary and makes it clear that she can only trust him.

Michael Elgin is tired of smashing through roadblocks and wants his match with Eddie Edwards to be for Eddie’s title shot.

Raj Singh vs. Fallah Bahh

Oh boy. Bahh runs over both Singh and Rohit Raju at the same time before hitting a running splash to crush Singh. A Gama Singh distraction lets Raj hit a jumping Downward Spiral for two and a running backsplash is good for the same. Raj grabs a Hennig necksnap as he is going above his pay grade. For some reason he tries to headbutt Bahh and staggers away in pain so Bahh chops him down. The big crossbody gets two on Raj (not as impressive after we saw Romero do the same big man crossbody in the previous match) and Bahh sends him into the interfering Raju. The Banzai Drop gives Bahh the pin at 4:54.

Rating: D+. Yeah this didn’t work and I don’t know why it was supposed to. The Hit Squad stopped meaning anything a long time ago and while Bahh has improved by leaps and bounds, he still isn’t going to be able to carry something like this. Not a terrible match, but give me something else to get my interest up.

Post match the beatdown is on until TJP makes the save, likely setting up a tag match.

Joey Ryan is told to go see Impact Management, which happens to be in the men’s room. He goes in and finds…..Tommy Dreamer, who sentences him to WRESTLER’S COURT. Ryan is charged with breaking kayfabe, exposing the business and killing towns. Johnny Swinger, the plaintiff, also accuses him of stealing rizzats and wants compensation of two pay envelopes and a handful of pizzills.

The sound guys and camera crew come out of the stalls as Joey points out how ridiculous this whole thing is. Ryan asks about an attorney but since Joseph Park is dead, that’s a no. They move to a different room because of the AXS money and it’s time for the first witness: D’Lo Brown, which also gives us the fact that D’Lo is short for Dee Lorean. Brown was sworn in earlier on a PWI 500 and goes on a rant about how this couldn’t be done in a Fortune 500 company.

We get rapid fire testimonies from Madison Rayne, Brutal Bob Evans (He works here?), Kiera Hogan (“It’s that mustache!”) and Gama Singh, as someone in a weird shirt is dragged out. Joey’s closing statement talks about how old guys with tennis rackets have already gone off on him and he knows wrestling should be fun. Maybe the good old days weren’t so good. Swinger: “BULLS***!” Dreamer: “GUILTY!” Ryan is sentenced to….face Acey Romero next week. Joey: “I don’t even know why I signed with this company.”

I’m sure this was a lot of fun to shoot and the people had a blast putting it together. I’m also not sure why it aired but I guess I’m not young enough to get why Tommy Dreamer and Joey Ryan taking shots at WWE and Jim Cornette and having cameos from career midcarders is funny. I chuckled a few times, but this is the kind of thing that was designed to entertain the locker room, not the fans.

Tag Team Open: Rascalz vs. OVE vs. Rich Swann/Willie Mack vs. Reno Scum

Tornado rules, one fall to a finish, and the winners get the title shot at Hard To Kill. It’s a big brawl to start with the Rascalz (Wentz and Dez here) hitting dives but Mack and Swann clear the ring. A bulldog puts Luster down and the assisted middle rope flip neckbreaker gets two on Thornstowe.

Jake comes back in so Mack can hit the standing moonsault for two more and it’s Dave being backdropped over the top onto various people. Mack comes up with a bad knee and things come to a halt as referees and trainers come out to check on him. Back from a break with Rich getting double teamed by Scum but managing to hit a double Lethal Injection on them anyway.

A kick to the face cuts Swann off and a spike Tombstone gets two as Wentz makes the save. Scum is back in to take over with a German suplex into a double stomp for two on Dave, who is tied into the Tree of Woe. A running Razor’s Edge sends Swann flying into Dave but it’s time for the Rascalz to hit rapid fire kicks on Luster. The Crists come back in and shrug off Swann’s kicks. The All Seeing Eye is loaded up but Swann reverses into a victory roll for the fast pin at 13:43.

Rating: B-. This is the kind of match that you would expect from something like this and it was rather entertaining. I could have gone with something a little more structured but that’s how tag team wrestling tends to go these days. Swann and Mack were the only choice to go forward here though as they have been chasing the titles for months now and need to win the things. The other teams looked good, but this was how it needed to go.

The North is watching from the balcony and doesn’t seem worried.

Taya Valkyrie thinks everyone is against her, which is the only reason the title match is now a triple threat. But it doesn’t matter because she’s Taya.

Flashback Moment of the Week: Gail Kim vs. Brooke vs. ODB from Bound For Glory 2013.

Brian Cage talks about having an up and down year but he’ll be waiting on whoever comes out of Hard To Kill as World Champion. Cage is ready to fight anyone around here but Rob Van Dam and Katie Forbes fall onto the couch with Katie all over him. Rob realizes the cameras are on and says that Cage stole a bunch of his moves. I think you know where this is going.

Tessa Blanchard vs. Mad Man Fulton

We get the ridiculous staredown with Tessa’s forearm having no effect. Fulton takes her into the corner and rams her head into the buckle over and over. He pulls her up and face first into the bottom of the middle buckle but Tessa slugs away anyway. An attempt at a slingshot powerbomb is countered into a hurricanrana to send Fulton outside. The suicide dive works but a middle rope crossbody is pulled out of the air. Back in and Tessa grabs a tornado DDT but here are the Crist Brothers to break up Magnum for the DQ at 3:10.

Rating: D+. They didn’t have time to do anything here but Tessa got in enough offense to make it better than it could have been. It’s one thing to book Tessa against a normal sized guy like Callihan but this was a bit too much to believe. They didn’t go too far with it, but if they hadn’t cut it off when they had, it would have been too much to believe.

Post match Tessa takes the All Seeing Eye but Ken Shamrock comes out for the save. That sets up the (scheduled) main event.

Sami Callihan vs. Ken Shamrock

Non-title. Sami slaps him in the face so Shamrock glares him down into the corner. After begging off a bit, Sami spits at Shamrock and gets kneed in the face for his efforts. That sends Sami outside, with Sami telling Shamrock to give him everything he has. A few shots to the face send Sami staggering into the barricade, but he’s fine enough for the spit chop.

Shamrock is even more annoyed than he was before and he kicks a charging Callihan down. Back in and Callihan gets two off a Death Valley Driver but runs into a powerslam to cut him right back off. Callihan pulls the referee into a charge though, only to get ankle locked a second later. Sami taps to no referee so here’s Fulton again to take out Shamrock. The ankle lock to the unconscious Shamrock gives Sami the win at 5:41.

Rating: C-. I’m not sure how smart it is to have the ancient Shamrock beating up your World Champion for most of the match and then needing help to give the champ the win. That being said, Shamrock has looked WAY better than I would have expected him to since his return. I mean, save for the whole Joey Ryan deal but everyone has to be tormented by something like that.

Post match Fulton stays on Shamrock and sends him outside, where Shamrock seems to hurt his knee. Even Sami tells Fulton to back off to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This was one of those shows that moved things forward only a little bit while also setting up some of the other things that needed to be done for Hard To Kill. Sami is already feeling like a lame duck champion though and that isn’t a good sign for the next month. Tessa getting the title could be a special moment, but it isn’t looking like a great story on the way there. The rest of the show was hit and miss, but that tends to be the case around here. Not too bad of a show, but one or two things going badly could have made it a horrible one.

Results

Rob Van Dam b. Rhino – Five Star Frog Splash

Moose b. Acey Romero – No Jackhammer Needed

Fallah Bahh b. Raj Singh – Banzai Drop

Rich Swann/Willie Mack b. Rascalz, OVE and Reno Scum – Victory roll to Dave Crist

Tessa Blanchard b. Mad Man Fulton via DQ when the Crist Brothers interfered

Sami Callihan b. Ken Shamrock – Ankle lock

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Impact Wrestling – November 5, 2019: They Failed

IMG Credit: Impact Wrestling

Impact Wrestling
Date: November 5, 2019
Location: St. Clair College, Windsor, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Don Callis, Josh Matthews

I don’t know how to say this but the company is on a roll. They had a good Bound For Glory and a rather strong debut on AXS, which seems to actually care about them. That being said, if there is one thing that Impact’s history has taught me it is to never get comfortable with what they are offering as they will instantly make you regret it. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Sami Callihan and OVE (complete with a bunch of unnamed lackeys) are drinking beer because they aren’t cowards who drink bubbly. They started a revolution and they are for Ohio, by Ohio.

Opening sequence.

Moose vs. Willie Mack

Moose runs him over with ease to start as we hear about his football career. Again. The discus lariat misses and it’s a headscissors to put Moose down, followed by a hurricanrana to send him outside. That means a running flip dive because some sort of a dive is required in wrestling these days.

Back in and Moose hits some running dropkicks in the corner, followed by a hard whip into another corner. The chokebomb out of the corner gets two but Mack fights up to no sell some forearms to the face. The chop off goes to a stalemate so Moose pokes him in the eye, only to get Stunned for his efforts. Mack’s standing moonsault gets two so he goes up but gets crotched right back down. A superplex drops Mack again and the spear gives Moose the pin at 8:38.

Rating: C. They did their usual stuff here with Mack being a freak of a different nature. Moose is your one of a kind athletic marvel though as he is such a big guy who gets to beat up anyone he wants to in a variety of ways. You don’t get something like that every day and it’s worth giving Moose whatever he wants so he can be around for a long time.

Alisha Edwards is scared about going to dinner with Ace Austin but is told to just enjoy it. She goes through some doors and just so happens to overhear Austin and Reno Scum talking about his rather nefarious plans for her. Alisha is livid.

Hard To Kill is coming to Dallas.

Taya Valkyrie and Madison Rayne trade pop music references to insult their fashion sense. Taya leaves and runs into Jordynne Grace, who wants a title shot. That gets her blown off, as expected.

Watch Turning Point this weekend! I won’t be but the card looks decent.

Michael Elgin vs. Fallah Bahh

They slug it out to start with Bahh no selling some big boots to the face. Elgin tries to jump over him in the corner but gets kicked in the ribs. A running splash in the corner hits Elgin’s raised boots and he falls to the floor for a dropkick through the ropes. Back in and a slingshot double stomp gives Elgin two and he manages a suplex for two as we take a break.

Rating: C. This was a hoss fight but it went on about twice as long as it needed to. You can only do the same power displays so often before the impact stops working. That was what happened here and the match wasn’t all that fun by the end. Elgin winning is the right call and thankfully Impact didn’t do anything zany. Also, well done by Bahh for turning into something other than a comedy goof, which I wouldn’t have bet on happening.

Austin comes up to Alisha, who gives him her hotel key and says they’re skipping dinner.

OVE is drunk and comes in to meet….Tommy Dreamer. They make fun of him for being fat and that’s it.

Flashback Moment of the Week: EC3 vs. Moose for the Grand Championship.

The North tells Naomichi Marufuji to find a partner for a Tag Team Title match next week.

Joey Ryan vs. Ken Shamrock

Just get this over with. Shamrock is in workout shorts and running shoes because he doesn’t think much of Ryan. Ryan gets backed up against the ropes and Ken gives him a clean break before snapping off some armdrags. The ankle lock attempt sends Joey to the rope and a dropkick staggers Shamrock. He offers a handshake so Ryan shoves the hand to his crotch for the YouPorn Plex. Shamrock is scared but manages the ankle lock for the win at 4:52.

Rating: F. You have Shamrock, who is pretty close to a legend in wrestling, willing to come in and help you out a little bit and this is what you use him for? To give a spot to Joey Ryan’s comedy bits? The Ryan stuff is dumb enough on its own for about 184 reasons, but they use Shamrock to do it? And Shamrock agreed???

OVE goes into the locker room and try on Daga’s vest. Daga comes in and a fight is teased until Rich Swann breaks it up to give us a main event.

Taya Valkyrie vs. Madison Rayne

Non-title. Madison tries to point out the LRL logo on the back of her trunks….but it’s not there for some reason. Taya kicks her down and hits a basement dropkick before kicking away. The armbar doesn’t last long so Taya stomps away in the corner, only to get drop toeholded into the middle buckle.

Madison gets in some knees and we take a break. Back with John E. Bravo tripping Madison down so Taya can take over again. Something like a Side Effect plants Madison again but she’s right back with a tornado DDT for two. A wind up cutter gets two with Bravo throwing his stuffed dog into the ring for the save. Taya knees her down and hits the Road to Valhalla for the pin at 11:45.

Rating: C. Taya is doing her thing and it seems pretty clear that we’re building up to the fight with Grace. There is nothing wrong with going there and I could go with Grace taking the title. Rayne is fine as well, but it just isn’t all that interesting of a match here. The Taya stuff has been done to death so far and they need to get to the title shot soon, not wait until January.

Post match Grace comes out and suplexes Bravo as Valkyrie bails.

Gama Singh yells at the Desi Hit Squad and brings in Bhurpinder Singh, who could replace one of them if they keep losing.

Ace goes to the hotel.

Rosemary yells at Susie about killing Allie and doesn’t buy the new act. Rosemary leaves and Susie goes up to Havok, who has no idea what is going on.

Bhurpinder Singh vs. Petey Williams

It wouldn’t be a Canadian show without Williams. For a bit of a detail, the referee has no legs. Williams avoids a charge to start and hammers away to send him outside. The slingshot hurricanrana is countered though and Singh drops a legdrop back inside. A Rock Bottom backbreaker sets up a spinout Rock Bottom for two but Williams is right back with a headscissors. Singh grabs a powerslam for two more, only to get caught with a slingshot….nothing as Singh catches him on the shoulders. That’s fine with Petey who slips down and grabs the Sharpshooter for the win at 3:58.

Rating: D+. This would be the match where we have to get these two into a match and I have no idea why we’re supposed to be interested. The Hit Squad continues to grow despite having all of its interest elsewhere, and then you have Petey who is there because of where the show is taking place. This stuff was old years ago and now it’s just a bad tradition.

Post match Singh goes after the referee but Petey makes the save, allowing the referee to hit a 619 into a 450. This is a thing that happened.

Into the hotel room now, where Alisha tells Ace to take it slow. She goes to change so Ace takes off his clothes and even blindfolds himself. Eddie Edwards, fight on the bed, Alisha canes Ace into the hall and, ahem, reunites with Eddie on the floor.

Johnny Swinger recruits Petey to be his young boy. Petey isn’t carrying his bag but here’s OVE to say they’re bringing the party to the ring.

Turning Point rundown the sequel.

Here’s OVE to celebrate in the ring. After a break, Jake Crist has to introduce Sami Callihan twice so Sami can talk about partying all week long. Cue Tommy Dreamer to talk about how Sami is a bully and a troll. Sami: “Fat Dreamer….can I call you Fat Dreamer?” He offers him a fight but Dreamer wants a referee for an EXTREME celebration.

OVE vs. Tessa Blanchard/Rich Swann/Daga/Tommy Dreamer

Anything goes and they start fighting on the floor. Tessa starts swinging a chair and Dreamer uses it for his baseball slide into Jake’s face. Fulton claw sweeps Dreamer onto the chair but gets tornado DDTed by Daga. It’s Sami vs. Swann for a bit with Rich being sent outside, setting up the showdown with Tessa.

A quick cutter drops Sami and Tessa hits the big flip dive to the floor to take everyone out. Back in and the small form Tower of Doom drops Fulton and Swann hits the double Lethal Injection on Sami and Jake. Sami is right back up with an attempted Cactus Special but gets reversed into a rollup to give Swann the pin at 5:51.

Rating: C-. That is some WWE style booking with the brand new World Champion losing in a random eight person tag a week after winning the title. They can cover up a lot of it by saying Sami was tired/drunk but what’s the point of having lackeys if they can’t take a fall here? Oh and I laughed at the Dreamer inclusion, because it’s a running gag at this point.

Overall Rating: D+. They missed on a lot of points here and it was a big step down from last week. Between the Squad/Petey/Dreamer inclusion to the embarrassment of having Shamrock wasted on Ryan, I was having trouble staying interested in this show. It was one bad Impact Wrestling trope after another and that isn’t a good sign a week after their big debut on their upgraded network.

Results

Moose b. Willie Mack – Spear

Michael Elgin b. Fallah Bahh – Crossface

Ken Shamrock b. Joey Ryan – Ankle lock

Taya Valkyrie b. Madison Rayne – Road to Valhalla

Petey Williams b. Thunderbird Singh – Sharpshooter

Tessa Blanchard/Rich Swann/Daga/Tommy Dreamer b. OVE – Rollup to Callihan

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Impact Wrestling – October 18, 2019: I’m Not Hopeful

IMG Credit: Impact Wrestling

Impact Wrestling
Date: October 18, 2019
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Don Callis

It’s the go home show for Bound For Glory and that means a few good things for this company. For one thing, we are almost to the biggest show of the year but it also means that things can reset a bit. This has been a pretty nice year for the company but getting back to a fresh start can be a good thing at times. Hopefully that is the case around here. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Sami Callihan and OVE recap Brian Cage snapping and being arrested as a result. This led to Callihan piledriving Cage’s wife Melissa Santos while Cage was handcuffed last week.

Michael Elgin vs. Fallah Bahh

TJP is out with Bahh. Elgin grabs a rough headlock to start before forearming away. The slam doesn’t quite work so Bahh kicks him in the chest instead. That earns Elgin a lot of shouting and a big shoulder from Bahh but the charge misses in the corner. Elgin gets two off a t-bone suplex and rams Bahh’s head into the buckle, which would suggest that he isn’t all that bright.

The rather muscular slam doesn’t do much to Bahh so Elgin superkicks him down instead. Bahh connects with the Samoan drop and some forearms, followed by the crossbody for two. Elgin manages to send him into the ropes for a German suplex but the big standing clotheslines don’t do much good. A big running clothesline gives Elgin two but Bahh is right back with another Samoan drop for another two. Bahh goes up, allowing Elgin to hit him in the back and grab the Elgin Bomb for the pin at 8:23.

Rating: C+. This was a case of two monsters hitting each other really hard and thankfully they went with the only logical ending of Elgin slaying the bigger beast. Elgin is a weird case as he’s a powerhouse and could be awesome as a face but that’s Brian Cage’s territory at the moment. Maybe down the line, but for now this is as good as we’re going to get. That’s not a bad place to be either.

Post match Elgin beats up TJP as well, including wrapping a chair around his neck and sending it into the post. An Elgin Bomb wraps it up.

We run down the rest of tonight’s card.

Jake Crist vs. Chris Bey

Non-title and Crist wastes no time in kicking him into the corner, only to get kicked in the head for his efforts. A missile dropkick sends Crist to the floor and that means the running dive. We take an early break and come back with Crist superkicking him out of the air for two and grabbing the chinlock. Bey fights out twice and gets pulled back in both times as the chinlocking is strong around here.

That’s switched over into the reverse Rings of Saturn to keep Bey in trouble and a slam gets two. The chinlock goes on again (come on already) but this time Bey pops back up with some shots to the face. A Fameasser gets two and a DDT out of the corner is good for the same. Crist takes him down out of the corner though and loads up the super cutter to finish Bey at 11:28.

Rating: C-. That super cutter always looks good but at the same time there is only so much you can do with that many chinlocks in a match. Crist is rather good at what he does and Bey got a lot out of this match. That being said, it could have been better had they cut out about two minutes of chinlocks, which is often a way to improve things.

Flashback of the Week: the six man tag from Impact vs. Lucha Underground over last Wrestlemania weekend in New Orleans.

Ace Austin is ready to become X-Division Champion, though Alisha Edwards isn’t convinced. He invites her to the parties that come with being champ but she still doesn’t think so. She finally agrees that she’ll come to the celebration if he wins.

Video on Ken Shamrock vs. Moose. Shamrock wants to be better every day and doesn’t like Moose calling him out. Moose has been training to prove that he is a naturally superior athlete. This could be a very bad idea if things go even the slightest bit wrong. Various media personalities are talking about the match because it’s sport vs. sport. Moose seems to be the favorite. They’re both training hard but Shamrock just looks ancient.

Taya Valkyrie talks to someone we can’t see about how they have been there for her the entire time. She talks about her career and how the person has gotten her here. That person would be….her of course. She’ll still be champion after Sunday.

Rich Swann vs. Josh Alexander vs. Rhino

All three partners are here too. Rhino clotheslines Alexander over to start as Swann is knocked out to the floor. Swann is back in with a dropkick but Alexander snaps off a spinebuster to send him outside again. Rhino gets beaten down as well as Alexander is dominant so far. The chinlock doesn’t last long so Swann comes back in, meaning it’s the required Tower of Doom with Swann getting the worst of it.

Swann is fine enough for a super hurricanrana to Alexander as the three seconds get in an argument on the floor. That’s fine with Alexander, who backdrops Swann onto all of them. The Gore hits Alexander but Rhino goes outside to deal with everyone else, allowing Swann to 450 Alexander for the pin at 6:25.

Rating: C. Perfectly watchable match here and a way to set things up for Sunday. If nothing else, we’ll go with something positive here because it isn’t going to lead to the other partners having the same match. Just do the thing once and let it speak for itself. Swann winning is fine, though it wouldn’t shock me to see he and Mack lose on Sunday as a result.

Sami Callihan talks about debuting two years ago and starting his era. Now it’s time for him to become World Champion. He isn’t worried about what he did to Cage and Santos because it was all about mind games. Sami starts crying and talks about how he wanted to be the best but last week was the Sami Callihan that the people created. On Sunday, you’ll have to imagine that he’s the best.

X-Division Title Qualifying Match: Rohit Raju vs. Sabu

Let’s get this over with. No DQ because it’s a Sabu match. Raju mocks Sabu’s point and hammers away to start so Super Genie throws in a chair. Air Sabu is broken up as Raju kicks the chair away, only to have Sabu come back with a tornado DDT. The one armed camel clutch doesn’t last long so Sabu takes it outside and loads up the table. A chair is pelted at Raju’s head and Sabu hits the top rope legdrop through the table for the double countout at 4:14.

Rating: D-. I’m not sure what kind of audience still needs to see Sabu doing this kind of thing and I don’t really want to know. Thankfully they didn’t have him qualify here as it could be a complete disaster to see him in a ladder match. They kept it short here and that’s the second best thing they could have done, aside from not having the match of course, but we must milk that ECW thing for all it is worth. I mean, it only ended eighteen years ago.

Tessa Blanchard is ready for the ladder match and has trained to get here. After becoming X-Division Champion, Sami Callihan is next.

Bound For Glory rundown.

Battle Royal

Eddie Edwards, Jordynne Grace, Havok, Cody Deaner, Cousin Jake, Rosemary, Johnny Swinger, Mahabali Shera, Raj Singh, Luster The Legend, Adam Thornstowe, Kiera Hogan

The winner is the last entrant in the Call Your Shot gauntlet while the last person eliminated is the first entrant. Swinger hits on the women to start and gets tossed out for his efforts. Kiera Hogan dropkicks Jordynne Grace out next and it’s time for Shera to clean house. Back from a break with Cousin Jake having been eliminated so Cody hammers on Shera. Hogan is tossed and Havok gets rid of Singh and Deaner at the same time.

Havok and Rosemary get rid of each other so we’re down to Reno Scum, Shera and Edwards. The obvious triple teaming is on but Thornstowe clotheslines Luster out by mistake. Eddie low bridges Thornstowe out and we’re down to two. Both guys tease an elimination but it’s Thornstowe distracting Eddie so Shera can get the win at 11:25.

Rating: D. Hey, did you know that Shera is awesome and totally from India, which gives Impact a lot of money? This was ever lame battle royal that you can remember with a pretty bad ending. It wasn’t a good match and Shera winning made me roll my eyes because the obvious reason for the push isn’t exactly interesting.

One more Bound For Glory video ends the show.

Overall Rating: D. Those last two matches really hurt this show and took away a lot of the energy that they had built up over the last few weeks. This show was built on highlight packages and while those can be useful, I need a little something more to get me ready for the biggest show of the year. There was no big angle here and nothing on here felt important. Bound For Glory may be good but the way they set it up really put them in a bad spot going into Sunday.

Results

Michael Elgin b. Fallah Bahh – Elgin Bomb

Jake Crist b. Chris Bey – Supper cutter

Rich Swann b. Josh Alexander and Rhino – 450 to Alexander

Rohit Raju vs. Sabu went to a double countout

Mahabali Shera won a battle royal last eliminating Eddie Edwards

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Impact Wrestling – September 6, 2019: The Champ Is Actually Here!

IMG Credit: Impact Wrestling

Impact Wrestling
Date: September 6, 2019
Location: Fronton Mexico, Mexico City, Mexico
Commentators: Don Callis, Josh Matthews

We’re still down in Mexico and hopefully things are better this week. Last time around, the show wasn’t worth watching with a bunch of matches featuring guest stars from Mexico and little in the way of major storyline developments. Hopefully things get better this time around as we’re getting closer to the build to Bound For Glory. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

Havok vs. Su Yung

Yung goes straight to the jabs to start (that’s more aggressive than I would have expected) but Havok sends her into the corner to start the pummeling. Some head first rams into the buckle knock Yung silly but the big leg misses. A running knee to the face gives Yung two, which just annoys Havok again. That means a chokebomb into a Boston crab with Yung having to bail to the ropes.

An anklescissors sends Havok face first into the middle buckle and the Mandible Claw goes on. Havok powers out but gets low bridged to the floor so Yung can flip dive off the apron. Since Havok is a monster, she’s right back up to drop Yung face first into the apron. With nothing else working, Su mists her for the DQ at 6:03.

Rating: C+. I don’t remember seeing Yung this aggressive in a long time and the match worked well as a result. It felt like Yung was in a fight and Havok was trying to destroy her. Their feud seems to be one based on who is more of a monster/evil, so the matches being more violent makes sense. You can all but guarantee some kind of gimmick match at Bound For Glory.

The North’s game plan for tonight: be the best tag team in the world and get rid of LAX.

Sami Callihan and OVE can’t wait to find out what happens to the World Title because it’s coming to Sami soon. Oh and Mad Man Fulton is going to finish Rob Van Dam and Sami has a nice jacket.

Moose vs. Fallah Bahh

Rubber match. Bahh is ticked off and splashes him in the corner at the bell to start fast. Moose misses a big chop and gets punched in the face, followed by a toss across the ring. Another shot to the face drops Moose but he goes to the eyes to cut him off. Just because he can, Moose runs up the corner for a spinning crossbody to drop Bahh. That lasts all of a second as Bahh pops up and turns Moose inside out with a clothesline. The Banzai Drop gets two and it’s No Jackhammer Needed to finish Bahh at 4:06.

Rating: C. You would think that a monster like Bahh losing weight would hurt him but he’s actually improved in the ring. Maybe it’s the weight loss adding speed but his matches have gotten better, possibly because he doesn’t have to rely on his size for everything anymore. If nothing else, the weight loss has turned into a bit of a story for him. Call that a nice little surprise, which is always appreciated.

Post match Moose puts Bahh in an ankle lock (he needs work) and screams about Ken Shamrock.

Tessa Blanchard yells at Tommy Dreamer, who she needs to help her get rid of OVE. Tommy tells her to calm down but she wants to know if he’s in or out. Tommy Dreamer is always in. Everywhere.

Alisha Edwards tells Eddie Edwards that she would never cheat on him but an unidentified female wrestler comes up to hit on him. Ace Austin comes up to check on Alisha but she leaves.

TJP vs. Golden Magic

Fallout from last week where Magic won a four way also involving TJP. They fight over wrist control to start until TJP gets in his headscissor takeovers. Magic snaps the throat across the top rope and hits the springboard flip dive to the floor as we take a break. Back with Magic being put in the Tree of Woe for a running dropkick, followed by the slingshot hilo for two. A front chancery doesn’t get TJP anywhere as Magic is right back up with something close to a Disaster Kick, only to have TJP roll some suplexes. A Swanton misses though and Magic hits a cool springboard twisting cutter to put TJP outside again.

That means a slingshot splash to the floor, which you won’t see very often. Back in and Magic is fine enough to hit the same Big Ending spun into a DDT that he used last week for two here. TJP’s brainbuster gets the same but Magic is right back with a springboard hurricanrana out of the corner. A dropkick to the leg takes Magic down but Magic follows him up top for a moonsault World’s Strongest Slam. The 450 misses though and TJP kneebars him for the tap at 10:09.

Rating: B-. This was your battle of the high fliers doing a bunch of big spots to each other, but TJP is the kind of guy who can pull throw in enough other stuff to add a different dimension to the match. I liked this one a good bit and could go for more TJP, who just looks like he gets it so much more than a lot of people.

Austin is about to pay off the mystery woman from earlier but Alisha shows up and he changes his tune in a hurry, saying he won’t pay for her services.

Flashback Moment of the Week: AJ Styles beats Sting at Bound For Glory 2009.

Taya Valkyrie is annoyed that things aren’t all about her and now Tenille Dashwood is coming to take her spotlight.

Johnny Swinger vignette, bragging about the size of his arms. This is really happening.

Dashwood is glad to be here when Madison Rayne and Kiera Hogan show up and tell her to go to the back of the line. She’s willing to fight anyone in the line right now so Madison makes Dashwood vs. Hogan for next week.

Mad Man Fulton vs. Rob Van Dam

Sami Callihan fires Fulton up before the bell so Van Dam starts slowly kicking at the leg. Fulton gets a hand around the throat so more kicks are required to save Van Dam. A dropkick to the knee and a spinwheel kick put Fulton on the floor so it’s the flip dive from the apron to put him down again. Fulton is fine enough to send him into the apron though and the beatdown is on. The swinging Rock Bottom is countered into a rollup to give Van Dam two and he kicks Fulton in the face again. Rolling Thunder connects but Dave Crist breaks up the Five Star for the DQ at 6:26.

Rating: D+. This didn’t have the time to go anywhere as a long stretch at the beginning was spent circling each other. Fulton can be a good monster so having Van Dam put him in this kind of trouble doesn’t exactly make him seem like a threat. At least it’s a star like Van Dam instead of someone much lower on the food chain, but Fulton shouldn’t be selling this much.

Post match Van Dam fights them both off and hits the Five Star on Dave.

Melissa Santos promiss answers on the future of the World Title tonight.

The Rascalz get in a fight in the clubhouse when Rich Swann and Willie Mack come in. Highness ensues and they’ll watch the LAX vs. North match together.

The Deaners are impressed with what the Desi Hit Squad have done on the farm. Now it’s time to go into the lake, with Raju being sent into the water.

Jordynne Grace goes to see Rosemary, who needs to stay out of her way. Rosemary says the Shadow told her to save Grace so get over it.

Konnan gives LAX a final pep talk.

Tag Team Titles: The North vs. LAX

LAX is challenging and this is titles vs. careers. Alexander drives Santana into the corner to start so Santana takes him down by the arm. Ortiz comes in for his falling splash and we take an early break. Back with everything breaking down and Ortiz chopping away at Page on the floor while Alexander works on Santana’s knee. Things settle back down with Santana getting beaten down in the corner but rolling over for the hot tag to Ortiz just a few seconds later.

A superkick/sitout powerbomb combination gets two on Alexander but an assisted implant DDT drops Ortiz right back. The double Neuralizer only gets two so the champs try their own Street Sweeper. That’s broken up as everything breaks down again but this time time the real Street Sweeper is blocked. The assisted spinebuster gets rid of LAX for good at 9:13.

Rating: B-. The lack of time hurt here as this felt like the kind of match that needed to be twenty minutes instead of less than half of that. LAX going to AEW is a good move for them as there is nothing left for them here, but at the same time they deserve a big sendoff here. The North had to beat them for their big definitive moment so it all makes sense, but it’s sad to see LAX go after they’ve been so good for the last year plus.

LAX and Konnan get a quick pose and that’s it for them.

Here are Brian Cage and Melissa Santos to address the World Title situation. Cage talks about how he spent fourteen years trying to become World Champion but he never expected how things went. He should be back in about six weeks to defend the title against Sami Callihan at Bound For Glory. The one positive to being injured has been that he has been able to spend more time with Melissa, which brings him to his most important thing. That would be a proposal, with Melissa saying yes to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. MUCH better show this week and one of the better ones they’ve done in a few weeks. The wrestling was mostly good up and down the card with only the Van Dam vs. Fulton match not being good to rather good. The only problem here was the timing of the Tag Team Title match, especially when the big closing angle was Cage announcing the Bound For Glory main event and proposing. That’s something that can be done later while LAX gets more time. Anyway, good show here and hopefully they can continue that roll.

Results

Havok b. Su Yung via DQ when Yung misted her

Moose b. Fallah Bahh – No Jackhammer Needed

TJP b. Golden Magic – Kneebar

Rob Van Dam b. Mad Man Fulton via DQ when Dave Crist interfered

The North b. LAX – Assisted spinebuster to Santana

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Impact Wrestling – June 28, 2019: They Need To Work On Their Emotional Impact

IMG Credit: Impact Wrestling

Impact Wrestling
Date: June 28, 2019
Location: Melrose Ballroom, New York City, New York
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Don Callis

It’s the next to last show before Slammiversary and that means things are getting interesting around here. They’ve done a rather nice job of making Rich Swann look like a star and hopefully that continues this week. At the same time they have to build up Sami Callihan vs. Tessa Blanchard some more, which could be anywhere from a train wreck to a big success. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

The North vs. Deaners

Well it’s better than the Desi Hit Squad….I think. Alexander and Jake start things off with Alexander’s headlocks and shoulders not working well. Jake’s works a bit better and it’s off to Cody, who gets two off Jake’s clothesline. Everything breaks down for a bit and Page gets knocked into a gutbuster for two. Jake comes back in and gets stomped down in the North corner for all of a few seconds before it’s back to Cody. A full nelson backbreaker gets two on Cody and Page stops to yell at a fan.

Alexander’s suplex keeps Cody in trouble and Page grabs a chinlock. Cody fights up and neckbreakers his way to freedom so Jake can come back in and clean house. A splash in the corner brings Cody back in rather soon but what looked to be a Magic Killer is broken up. Jake and Alexander slug it out with Jake no selling a German suplex. Some double teaming puts Jake on the floor and it’s Cody getting thrown off the top. The double Neuralizer gives Page the pin at 10:02.

Rating: D+. I’m still not getting the appeal of either of these teams and neither of them are helping the shows for the most part. The North are the better options and thankfully they haven’t been focusing on being from Canada for the most part. The Deaners….my goodness how long did they put into this idea? Maybe eighteen seconds?

Taya Valkyrie and Rosemary have a meeting in the back about the Monster’s Ball but Rosemary would rather talk about her upcoming title shot. They have a tag match tonight but Taya is worried about their outfits not matching. Rosemary says it’ll be fine. Rosemary: “Trust us.” Taya: “Us?”

Brian Cage is not cleared to compete.

We look at Moose attacking Tommy Dreamer at a House of Hardcore event. Forgive me for not feeling the emotional impact of Tommy Dreamer getting beaten up.

Slammiversary/the rest of the night rundown.

Su Yung/Havok vs. Rosemary/Taya Valkyrie

Taya and Rosemary argue over who is going to start until Havok takes Taya into the corner for some choking. Havok switches it up a bit with choking in another corner before handing it off to Yung. Since Yung is kind of all over the place, her best offense is to let Havok kick Taya in the head. The bloody glove comes out but it’s already back to Havok, who Taya climbs over and makes the tag off to Rosemary. A quickly broken Last Chancery causes everything to break down and it’s Havok vs. Rosemary on the floor. Rosemary kicks a chair into Havok’s face and it’s a double countout at 5:02.

Rating: D+. At least the characters are more interesting here. I’m also glad they didn’t have a pin for a change as you want to keep everyone strong heading into Monster’s Ball. I don’t know why that’s so complicated as countouts and disqualifications can be your friend in a situation like this. A little short, but at least the ending was right.

Post match the brawl continues with Rosemary busting out the tacks. Havok saves Su from going into them but Su hits Havok by mistake. James Mitchell has to come in and keep the peace.

Ace Austin isn’t happy with losing to TJP last week but it wasn’t fair because he didn’t know TJP worked here. TJP comes in, makes fun of his time in WWE, and a rematch is set for next week.

The Deaners drink the loss away when the Desi Hit Squad comes in to mock them. More beer is consumed.

Slammiversary rundown.

Flashback Moment Of The Week: X-Division Title ladder match at Slammiversary 2014.

Eddie Edwards goes to church to confess about his love of violence. The priest turns into Killer Kross, who talks about Eddie trying to find himself. Eddie will wait for Slammiversary while Kross stays and threatens the priest.

John E. Bravo talks to the other referees and says Johnny Bravo completes him. Rich Swann comes in to go after Bravo but Impact and Willie Mack come in. A tag match is made for later.

Sami Callihan vs. Fallah Bahh

Madman Fulton and Scarlett Bordeaux are the seconds here. Bahh glares Sami down for daring to chop him but a Fulton distraction works a bit better. That’s good for an ejection so we’re down to one on two. Sami gets in a clothesline and grabs a chinlock, which works so well that they do it again. Bahh gets back up and hits a running splash, followed by the running hip attack. It’s too early for the Banzai drop so Sami bites the arm. A few kicks to the face set up a hanging Cactus Special for the pin on Bahh at 6:43.

Rating: D. This was back to the old style for Bahh and that isn’t the best thing in the world. He’s not the most interesting guy in the world at his best and this was worse than the previous few times he’s been out there. I’m not sure how bad it’s going to be with Scarlett gone, but it’s not like she did anything here.

Post match Sami says that’s how you get over as only a man can do. Sami wants to say something to Tessa but wants to do it to her face so get out here. Tessa comes out and jumps over the ropes, despite Sami holding the ropes open for her. Sami says Tessa wants to be treated as an equal so he bicycle kicks her. She pops back up and hammers away until the Crists run out, allowing Sami to get in a baseball bat shot to the ribs. Tessa spits in his face so it’s a Cactus Special to leave her laying.

Rascalz vs. Laredo Kid/LAX

Konnan is out with LAX/Kid. It’s a staredown to start but Kid springboard dives onto the Rascalz and we start fast. The ring is cleared out until it’s Kid springboard crossbodying Miguel and then moonsaulting off the top onto everyone else. Back from a break with Miguel getting caught in a reverse powerbomb for a series of splashes for two. Miguel flips out of a belly to back suplex from Santana and makes the tag to Wentz for a breather.

Everything breaks down and Santana sends Miguel into Xavier for a spear. A Batista Bomb plants Wentz so Xavier grabs a running Spanish Fly. Miguel’s enziguri to Kid gives us the big knockdown for a much needed breather. Everyone gets up for the big slugout with the Rascalz getting punched down and stacked up. Kid’s 450 onto all three gets two but the Rascalz are back up to send Kid outside. Santana follows him out and it’s a series of kicks to take Ortiz down. The top rope Meteora gives Miguel the pin at 10:15.

Rating: B. This was pure action from start to finish and that’s all you could ask for out of such a match. The Rascalz have been rolling as of late and Laredo Kid has been a great surprise whenever he shows up. Rascalz vs. LAX is likely going to steal the show at Slammiversary, but then someone is bound to steal LAX because they’re too good to keep around.

Madison Rayne thinks Jordynne Grace deserves a rematch but Kiera Hogan comes in to say this isn’t a sisterhood. She’s a selfish b**** just like all of them, but Kiera is the only one to admit it. Rayne isn’t going to let her bring the ugliness out of the locker room so they’ll fight at some point.

The Rascalz argue over which of the three of them will fight at Slammiversary. They’ll figure it out in a Rascals Extravaganza next week.

Slammiversary card. Again.

Brian Cage arrives and comes in even though he isn’t cleared.

Here’s Cage in the ring for a chat. Cage calls out Michael Elgin, who sent him to the hospital and put him on the shelf. Now Cage is back though and he’s ready for Slammiversary. Cue the doctor, who gets beaten up before he can say anything. Elgin comes in and hits a buckle bomb, followed by an Elgin Bomb.

Elgin holds up the title as Cage pulls himself up, only to get Elgin Bombed right back down. It’s table time and Elgin powerbombs him through it again, which is enough to draw Callis up from commentary. He yells at Elgin and gets dropped, setting up a teased Elgin Bomb but cage is back up. The brawl is on to finish the show. Good segment, though attacking Callis might not have the impact that they were hoping for.

Overall Rating: C-. The main event was the best thing about the show but it wasn’t quite enough to save the whole thing. What worked well here was the direction towards Slammiversary as you can see the build on every match. That’s a good sign as a lot of cards these days barely get any build beyond the bare minimum. It’s well done here though and while the weekly wrestling is up and down, the build has been solid and that’s the more important thing.

Results

The North b. Deaners – Double Neutralizer to Cody

Rosemary/Taya Valkyrie vs. Havok/Su Yung went to a double countout

Sami Callihan b. Fallah Bahh – Hanging Cactus Special

Rascalz b. LAX/Laredo Kid – Top rope Meteora to Ortiz

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Impact Wrestling – June 7, 2019: It’s Down There, Buried Beneath The Old

IMG Credit: Impact Wrestling

Impact Wrestling
Date: June 7, 2019
Location: 2300 Arena, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Don Callis, Josh Matthews

We’re still in Philadelphia and unfortunately that probably means more ECW guys taking up a huge part of the show. That being said, I’m almost scared to see what they might come up with next. Why they need to come up with anything new is beyond me as they have a lot of talent who can have some awesome matches when they actually put in the effort. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We recap last week’s show, which was quite the all over the place show.

Opening sequence.

Cousin Jake vs. Ace Austin

Jake’s cousin Cody is in his corner. Austin gets in some pushups before we start but he can’t get in a drop toehold. Some kicks to Jake’s back work a bit better and a hurricanrana takes Jake down. Austin low bridges him to the floor and, after the handstand on the apron, kicks Jake in the face. A running flip dive is blocked though and a running crossbody against the apron gives Jake two. Back in and Austin gets body blocked out of the air but Ace avoids a charge in the corner.

That means a paper cut with the Ace of spades and a top rope Fameasser gets two on Jake. It’s time to start on Jake’s arm with a variety of pulling. Some chops just annoy Jake so Austin kicks him in the head instead. Jake blasts him with a clothesline for a double knockdown as Cody cheers Jake from ringside. A Michinoku Driver gives Jake two and there’s a running shoulder n the corner. Cue the Desi Hit Squad to go after Cody though, allowing Ace to hit the Fold for the pin at 8:54.

Rating: C. Actually a nice little match here but then again I’ve liked Ace since he first showed up. Jake is fine for a powerhouse in the ring when you get rid of the ridiculous gimmick. As usual, Impact does a lot better when it comes to the wrestling parts rather than the talking and character stuff, but that goes for a lot of companies these days.

Taya Valkyrie doesn’t want to hear about Rosemary again and it’s not Taya’s fault that Rosemary is obsessed with her.

The announcers chat about the show.

Taya Valkyrie vs. Rosemary

Non-title and Rosemary still has Su Yung on the chain. Taya takes her down and hammers away to start, followed by some kicks in the corner. The fans certainly seem to like Taya strutting around the ring and hitting a Meteora in the corner. Rosemary is right back with the Upside Down but a missile dropkick misses. Something like a Sling Blade takes Taya right back down and a reverse DDT gets two. It’s off to a Koji Clutch of all things….and here are James Mitchell and Havok (a monster who used to be part of the Knockouts division) with the latter taking out Rosemary for the DQ at 4:28.

Rating: D+. This was a storyline match instead of something worthwhile and that’s ok. What might not be ok is this Mitchell vs. Rosemary story continuing, as it seems to just keep going for months on end. That being said, having Havok in there at least offers a fresh direction and it might actually be able to go somewhere for a change.

Post match Havok lays out Taya and Rosemary as Mitchell certainly approves. Havok lets Yung free.

The Rascalz are ready for their Tag Team Title shot and talk about the Pet Shop Boys. Trey drinks a bit.

Flashback Moment of the Week: Great Muta vs. Mr. Anderson from TNA vs. the World in 2015.

Eddie Edwards comes up to Sandman in the back because he can’t accept the new kendo stick. Eddie: “It wouldn’t be fair to Kenny.” Sandman writes KENNY on the stick and Eddie is happy.

Video on Brian Cage vs. Michael Elgin at Slammiversary.

Elgin has showed that he’s better than Cage and the path he’s clearing leads straight to the World Title. Next week, Elgin will see Cage across the ring from him instead of Willie Mack.

Madman Fulton vs. Fox Vinier/Michael Emineo

Sami Callihan slaps Fulton in the face to start and Fulton starts beating both of them up at once. Vinier is slammed onto Emineo and they’re both run over again. A chokeslam to each sets up a double chokeslam but Sami isn’t happy. He slaps Fulton a few times and says to kill them, setting up a swinging Downward Spiral to send Vinier onto Emineo for the pin at 3:23.

Rating: D. Well that worked. This was the kind of destruction that you have to have with a monster like Fulton and it’s been rather effective. Sami having a bit of a cult thing going on is a good story for him and something that could go somewhere. Just keep him away from doing goofy stuff and see where it can go from here. If nothing else, tie it back into him being the first man to beat Cage and set up a World Title feud.

Post match Sami says he’s sick of the Knockout nonsense and people like Scarlett Bordeaux and Fallah Bahh embarrassing them. Actually get the Crists out here right now because we’re having the tag match right now.

Crist Brothers vs. Fallah Bahh/Scarlett Bordeaux

I certainly don’t mind Scarlett being out here, but what is up with the intergender obsession lately? Bahh suplexes Jake to start but Sami grabs his foot. That’s enough for a double ejection of Callihan and Fulton, leaving Bahh to slam Dave. A missed charge sends Bahh shoulder first into the post though and the Brothers take over. Bahh shouts a lot as the two of them beat him up, including Jake ripping at Bahh’s mouth.

One heck of a crossbody crushes Dave but Jake prevents the hot tag, which might not be the brightest idea in the world. Dave gets sent to the floor but manages to pull Scarlett off the apron before Bahh can get to her. For some reason Jake tries a sunset flip and gets crushed, allowing the tag to Scarlett. Some headscissors have the Brothers in trouble and a double high crossbody sets up Bahh’s double suicide dive.

Scarlett’s top rope flip dive takes both of them down again as the fans deem this awesome. Back in and Jake slams Scarlett, sending Callis through the roof. You mean someone is mad because they got beaten up? Scarlett is right back with a reverse hurricanrana and it’s a Doomsday Device for two on Dave (she’s from Chicago). The double Banzai Drop misses though and Scarlett is rocked, allowing Jake to hit Bahh with a roll of quarters for the pin at 10:24.

Rating: C-. I’m really not sure about this one, but the negatives outweigh the positives. First of all, Scarlett did not embarrass herself in the slightest out there. She’s clearly a well trained and experienced worker so this is far from Sable back in the day. At the same time though, I have a hard time buying that Scarlett and Bahh are a real threat to former Tag Team Champions.

There comes a point where it’s hard to believe what is being presented and while they did not go past that, they walked the line as close as you can. What took me out of it was how fast Scarlett was taken down by basic offense. A slam and a missed Banzai Drop stun her? That doesn’t bode well for the future and suggests a lot of suspension of disbelief in these matches. Intergender matches can work and Scarlett has the talent to make them believable, but they have to be done right.

Post match the Crists go after Scarlett again but Tessa Blanchard makes the save, including Magnum to Jake. So is man vs. woman Tessa’s thing now? I get that she’s better than the rest of the Knockouts, but I’m not sure how well this is going to go.

Willie Mack doesn’t like the idea of Elgin taking food off his plate so it’s time to stop Elgin. Rich Swann says he has his back. Johnny Impact comes in to say that bad times are coming. Rich is about to be on the Johnny Impact diet because after Slammiversary, he’ll be ten pounds lighter.

Callihan yells at the Crists and promises to take care of the Knockouts.

Kiera Hogan vs. Jordynne Grace

Hogan hits her in the face a few times and scores with a dropkick but charges into a boot in the corner. A middle rope backsplash gives Grace two and the one armed delayed Jackhammer gets two. Kiera is smart enough to hide in the corner to sucker Grace in and choke away, followed by a basement dropkick for two of her own.

There’s something like a one knee Codebreaker for two more, but Grace is right back with a spinebuster. Some running knees in the corner have Hogan in more trouble and her attempt at a super sunset bomb goes rather badly. A kick to the head misses Grace and the Grace Driver finishes Hogan at 7:58.

Rating: C-. Hogan’s heel turn isn’t all that interesting yet as the division already has enough top heels, but Grace needed a win to get some more momentum. It’s not a good match or anything, but Grace got to show off the power and it’s not like losing to her is some devastating moment.

Konnan yells at LAX for not taking the Rascalz seriously. Santana: “They’re from Toledo!”

Moose doesn’t like ECW legends being around here twenty years past their prime and wants Rob Van Dam at Slammiversary. And he’s the heel in this?

Tag Team Titles: LAX vs. Rascalz

Zachary Wentz/Dezmond Xavier for the challenging Rascalz here with Konnan and Trey Miguel at ringside. Wentz and Ortiz feel things out to start as Konnan tells commentary to talk nicely about him. Dez comes in and kicks Ortiz to the floor, followed by a running double stomp to Santana’s back. That means the back to back dives to the floor as the champs are in early trouble. Back in and a Swanton into the Final Flash gets two on Santana as we take a break.

We come back with Ortiz hitting a middle rope DDT on Wentz, followed by a German suplex to give Santana two. The champs’ double teaming starts until a missed charge allows the hot tag to Dez. That means the pace picks up with a suicide dive from Dez and a tag back to Wentz. A sunset flip sends Santana across the ring but he rolls into a cutter on Dez, leaving Wentz to get rolled up for two.

Everyone is down for a bit until Dez breaks up the champs’ double belly to back faceplant. Instead Wentz gets powerslammed but Ortiz gets annoyed at Miguel for stealing his flask. The contents of said flask are spat in the referee’s face so Wentz hits a springboard cutter on Santana. Miguel comes in with a top rope Meteora with another referee (one who doesn’t seem to have been paying attention) to count the pin for the titles at 14:25.

Rating: B. The ending seems to be setting up another match but I’m not sure how far they can go with a story of the third member of the team stealing a pin. That being said, I’d like to see these teams again, but that’s partially because the Rascalz have been rather awesome since their debut. A good rematch at Slammiversary could be pretty entertaining. As for the match itself, it was the usual awesome, fast paced match you would expect from these teams.

Or not as the first referee wakes up to say it’s a DQ so LAX retains.

Overall Rating: C. This wasn’t the best show in the world, but the lack of the ECW stars helped a lot. Throw in a good main event and an effective Fulton squash and the good was just enough to even out the bad. Tweak a few things that aren’t going so well and you could have a fine show here. The stories are interesting and, again, when they ignore the cheap nostalgia stories, they’re quite fun to watch. There was some stuff in here that could have been better, but what they had was enough to keep me interested and not get on my nerves, so they’re heading in the right direction.

Oh and because Impact: Pursuit aired last week’s episode so the only way to see this was if you watched on Twitch. They can’t even go too weeks without some kind of gaffe, but who else is going to take them?

Results

Ace Austin b. Cousin Jake – The Fold

Rosemary b. Taya Valkyrie via DQ when Havok interfered

Madman Fulton b. Fox Vinier/Michael Emineo – Swinging Downward Spiral to Vinier

Crists b. Fallah Bahh/Scarlett Bordeaux – Jake hit Bahh with a roll of quarters

Jordynne Grace b. Kiera Hogan – Grace Driver

LAX b. Rascalz when Trey Miguel interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Impact Wrestling – May 24, 2019: Just Do It If You Have To

IMG Credit: Impact Wrestling

Impact Wrestling
Date: May 24, 2019
Location: 2300 Arena, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Don Callis

You knew this was coming at some point and there was no way around it. This week’s show is headlined by an ECW tribute match between Rob Van Dam and Tommy Dreamer. They’re both somewhat regulars around here, but I still can’t stand it when the promotion stops what they’re doing to praise a promotion that went out of business nearly twenty years ago. How many times have they done this over the years? Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap of last week’s pretty good show.

Opening sequence.

Sami Callihan vs. Fallah Bahh

Sami is on his own but Bahh has Scarlett Bordeaux. Callihan goes straight at him in the corner so Bahh is back with a clothesline and running splash. Some running clotheslines don’t do much to Bahh, who slams Callihan with little effort. Bahh’s spinning elbow gets two and the toe goes into Sami’s mouth.

That earns Bahh a bite and Callihan is knocked outside. They head outside with the spit chop having Bahh in even more trouble. A middle rope clothesline knocks Bahh down again and it’s back to the toe. Some shots to the head anger Bahh, but he gets taken right back down into a chinlock. Bahh fights up again and screams his name a lot, meaning it’s time for some chops and a belly to belly.

The Banzai Drop is loaded up too early and Sami knees him down for two. The Samoan drop (he likes drops) plants Sami to set up the Banzai Drop but here are the Crists for the save. Jake superkicks Dave by mistake so Scarlett takes Jake down, leaving Bahh to plant Sami. Bahh hits the suicide dive onto the Crists but a hanging Cactus Special finishes Bahh (with feet on the ropes) at 10:47.

Rating: C-. Not too bad here with a lot of stuff going on to make it a little better. Scarlett and Bahh’s Beauty and the Beast thing is an easy way to go, though Scarlett seems to be destined for something a lot bigger. Bahh has been putting in the effort recently though and has slimmed down a bit. I still see potential in OVE, but they never really break through to the other side for some reason.

Tommy Dreamer talks about wrestling Rob Van Dam in this building in 1996 (first match I can find for them there was in 1997). Then they headlined Madison Square Garden to unify the Hardcore and Intercontinental Titles (that match didn’t headline the show) and then Hardcore Justice (Dreamer and Van Dam were never involved in a match together, either working with or against each other, at any Hardcore Justice event, nor did Dreamer ever main event one of those shows). They’ll bring it against each other and make it extreme one more time. Or for the first time since he isn’t the most accurate narrator.

Johnny Impact has the red X from United We Stand that makes him #1 contender to the X-Division Title. He insults Michael Elgin, who is right behind him. Impact backpedals and suggests that they team up against Rich Swann and Willie Mack.

Knockouts Title: Madison Rayne vs. Taya Valkyrie

Taya is defending after losing to Madison in a series of non-title matches. Madison chases her outside and then back inside so the punching can begin. A middle rope crossbody gives Madison two and we take a break. Back with Madison getting two off a cutter to send Taya outside. Taya suckers her to the floor and gets in a kick to the leg to take over. With Don making some subtle references to Josh being Madison’s husband, Taya starts in on the leg. That means we stop for some posing before it’s off to the half crab.

The rope break gets Madison out of trouble so it’s the swinging Rock Bottom to take her down again. The limping Madison forearms back, only to walk into a spear. Madison is right back with her own half crab (which she used to win last time). Taya evens up the rope grabbing score and grabs the referee for a distraction, setting up the Road to Valhalla to retain the title at 14:07.

Rating: C. This was a good way to wrap up the story which didn’t overstay its welcome. Madison might not be the most interesting talent in the world but she’s more than capable of having a match like this. Taya winning when she had to makes her seem especially dangerous, though you can feel the showdown with Tessa coming from here, as should be the case.

Post match here’s Rosemary with the chained up Su Yung so Taya bails in a hurry.

The Deaners eat and talk about getting in shape. Their solution: beers and cheese steaks.

Rosemary and Yung run into James Mitchell, who isn’t happy with them. He wants Yung back but Rosemary tells him to go back and cower at his father’s boots. Rosemary wants the title now and Yung is going to die.

Flashback Moment Of The Week: Sami Callihan vs. Pentagon from last year’s Slammiversary.

Eddie Edwards talks about his highs and lows with Kenny by his side. Next week, he’s getting back at Killer Kross for breaking Kenny in half.

The Rascalz hate training and argue with each other so the smoke starts up again and everything is calm. We get a fresh training montage, which goes far better than last week.

The North vs. LAX

Non-title. Santana works on Alexander’s arm to start and it’s quickly off to Ortiz for a rollup. Page comes in and takes LAX’s rapid fire double teaming, setting up a suicide dive onto Alexander. Back in and Alexander takes Ortiz down for a top rope elbow from Page as the villains take over. A suplex out of the corner gives Alexander two and Page grabs the chinlock.

That’s broken up in short order and Santana comes in off the hot tag to clean house. A dropkick through the ropes sends Page up the ramp and it’s time for some kicks to Alexander’s head. Page comes back in for a knee to Santana’s head to give Alexander two of his own and a double Neutralizer is good for the same on Ortiz. LAX has had it though and their rapid fire kicks into the double belly to back faceplant finishes Alexander at 8:19.

Rating: C+. Nice match here, despite the North being one of the least interesting teams this side of the Desi Hit Squad. I know Don Callis is booking but is that really the best idea they have? They’re the tag team version of Petey Williams with the main sticking point of their characters being that they’re from Canada. At least the match was pretty good though, which does help a lot.

Here’s Glenn Gilbertti for a special exhibition. He hates women’s wrestling and wants to prove how worthless women are so here’s Ashley Vox to challenge him. Gilbertti asks which of the boys she’s dating because she must have been fired from Hooters.

Glenn Gilbertti vs. Ashley Vox

Gilbertti shoves her down to start and talks trash on the mic while sending her into the buckle and grabbing a hard headlock on the mat. Gilbertti: “I know this isn’t a five star match but it’s not my fault!” More trash talk lets Vox get in a rollup and some dropkicks so Gilbertti hits the Chartbuster. That’s good for two with Gilbertti pulling her up and shouting that Vox kicked out of his finish. Cue Tessa Blanchard to chase Gilbertti off for the no contest at about 3:30.

Rating: F. I get what they’re going for (it’s not exactly subtle) and Gilbertti is good at what he’s doing, but this feels like it’s out of 1984. This was going to be Eli Drake and that would have helped with the blowoff, because there is no reason to believe that this is going to end with anything other than Tessa beating him in ten seconds. They spent months building up Tessa for Gail Kim and this is the best they have for her? You can’t just have her slaughter some jobbers for a few weeks until she has something else to do? It’s not the worst, but it certainly feels like a bottom of the barrel storyline.

Rohit Raju vs. Petey Williams vs. Ace Austin vs. Dezmond Xavier

They start fast with Austin hitting a springboard spinning kick to Raju’s jaw. Petey’s slingshot Codebreaker staggers Austin and a running bulldog drops him onto Raju. Austin breaks up a very early Canadian Destroyer attempt and it’s time to cut Raju’s finger with the playing card. Dez comes in and fires off the strikes, plus a suicide dive onto Raju. Austin adds his own dive and kicks some people in the head. Petey comes back in with a Canadian Destroyer to Austin but Raju stomps on his back to break up one on Dez. The backflip kick to Raju’s head gives Dez the pin at 3:49.

Rating: C-. Was there really a need to not even give them four minutes? This was entertaining while it lasted but it felt like the first third of a fun match that never got the chance to get going. The X-Division could use some fresh blood and there are some viable challengers in here, with the Rascalz being great candidates along with Austin.

Next week: Impact/Elgin vs. Mack/Swann, Eddie Edwards vs. Killer Kross in a street fight and Gilbertti vs. Blanchard.

Tommy Dreamer vs. Rob Van Dam

Rob grabs the chair instead and skateboards it into Dreamer’s face in the corner. Dreamer is right back by putting Rob in the Tree of Woe for the running dropkick (after the ECW chant of course). Rolling Thunder misses and Dreamer hits the DDT on the chair for two more. The fans want the table but settle for Rob’s spinning legdrop on the chair. Dreamer is right back up with the piledriver and a flipping sell from Rob. An elbow hits the chair and Rob is right back with a drop toehold into the chair ala Raven. The Five Star finishes Dreamer at 9:23.

Rating: D. It wasn’t terrible and they didn’t embarrass themselves, but is there a reason that these two are getting almost ten minutes and the X-Division guys, who are going to be here in a few years and could be stars of the future, are stuck cramming in everything they can into less than four minutes? Are Van Dam and Dreamer really the best this company can do for a draw to a TV taping? The guys were trying, but it just makes you realize that their heyday was twenty years ago. That’s the best you have?

Post match the North runs in to beat down Van Dam and Dreamer with Moose coming in to make it even worse. The lights go out and freaking Sabu is here with the chairs for the save. A Van Daminator lets the ECW guys pose to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. There are two big issues sticking out in this show and it hurts everything else. The booking goes from fine to “we’re really doing this?” far too often and that’s going to become an issue. It’s still a watchable show, but they seem to force these things in for the sake of some short term booking which could be used on much more valuable stuff. I don’t need to see Gilbertti, Van Dam and Dreamer (though he’s on every show anymore) in 2019, though Impact seems to think they’re the best options. What does that say about how they view their own talent?

Results

Sami Callihan b. Fallah Bahh – Hanging Cactus Special with feet on the ropes

Taya Valkyrie b. Madison Rayne – Road to Valhalla

LAX b. The North – Double belly to back faceplant to Alexander

Glenn Gilbertti vs. Ashley Vox went to a no contest when Tessa Blanchard interfered

Dez b. Rohit Raju, Petey Williams and Ace Austin – Backflip kick to Raju’s head

Rob Van Dam b. Tommy Dreamer – Five Star Frog Splash

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Impact Wrestling – May 10, 2019: The Problem With The Entire Company

IMG Credit: Impact Wrestling

Impact Wrestling
Date: May 10, 2019
Location: Rebel Sports Entertainment Complex, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Don Callis, Josh Matthews

We’re still in Canada and we still don’t have a World Champion around at the moment due to Brian Cage’s back injury. What we do have though is a new #1 contender in the form of Michael Elgin, who seems rather content with waiting around until Cage gets back. I’m not sure what that means for this week so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap, with the World Title situation getting some extra time, as it should.

Opening sequence.

Josh: “We sit just fifty eight days away from Slammiversary!” You might want to wait a bit on that countdown.

Moose/Josh Alexander vs. LAX

Non-title and no Konnan with LAX. Alexander and Santana start things off with an exchange of wristlocks until Ortiz comes in for the running splash. It’s off to Moose, who puts Ortiz on top and dropkicks him to the floor. That leaves Callus enough time to list off Moose’s athletic stats and then say they’re off the charts. Hence why they have been charted you see. Back to Alexander for some forearms in the corner and the required chinlock.

Ortiz fights up and suplexes Alexander into a Stunner for the tag off to Santana. Moose gets sent outside and it’s a double flapjack into a facebuster combination to drop Alexander again. It’s already back to Moose for the power, including a powerbomb to Ortiz onto Santana. The chokebomb gets two on Santana but Moose hits Alexander by mistake, allowing LAX to hit a double enziguri. With Moose down on the ground, LAX hits their usual flurry into the double faceplant to finish Alexander at 7:38.

Rating: C. LAX can do no wrong at this point and that was the case again here, with another entertaining performance against a team that didn’t have the best chemistry. If nothing else though, hearing “their opponents, Moose and Josh Alexander” sounds a lot better than The North. That’s such a bad name for a team and while their work is good, it sounds like the most indy of names.

Madison Rayne is ready for her third non-title match against Taya Valkyrie, even if Taya doesn’t have to defend the title for thirty days. I get the story they’re going for here, but Madison is another shining example of what is wrong with a lot of the roster: she’s perfectly adequate. She’s going to give you a fine match, a fine promo and a fine everything, but there’s no reaching for the next level. Madison, along with so many others on the roster, are a safe bet and that’s a big reason why Impact never goes any higher than they already are.

Tommy Dreamer gives his partners a big pep talk about how they’re all a bunch of misfits. He knows about that, because he used to work for ECW. I actually yelled at my screen OH MY GOODNESS SHUT UP ABOUT ECW. Dreamer promises that the team will fight tonight, because this is the kind of company he wants to fight for.

Announcers’ preview.

Madison Rayne vs. Taya Valkyrie

Non-title again and Tessa Blanchard comes out for commentary, definitely acting a lot more faceish. Taya heads straight outside for the stalling so Madison chases her back inside, where the champ gets in a dropkick to the head. That means the always annoying break less than a minute in and we come back with Madison hitting a running shoulder in the corner.

Taya throws her down again and we have an inset window showing Tessa on commentary. I don’t really need to watch commentary talking, but EGADS is that better than cutting to Gail every ten seconds. Taya cuts off a springboard with a faceplant and it’s a Jeff Hardy legdrop between the legs. A little dance sets up Taya bending Madison’s ribs around the post as the announcers talk almost non-stop about Gail vs. Tessa.

Back in and Madison gets in a tornado DDT, followed by a few forearms for two. A windup cutter gives Madison two as Tessa forgets that this is non-title. Taya stops for more trash talk and slow kicks to the back/chest. A big kick is countered into a half crab and Taya taps immediately at 12:08.

Rating: C-. The story is fine and they can do a title match before Slammiversary, but I’m still not buying Madison as a top challenger. She hasn’t missed a step since her previous run, but that doesn’t make her all that inspiring. Taya tapping so fast makes sense and it’s very nice that they’re doing a story with the champion losing over and over again rather than just doing it and rarely going anywhere other than “here’s a title shot to make it 50/50”.

This week’s Flashback Moment of the Week: Rob Van Dam beats Abyss at Bound For Glory.

Van Dam thinks he’s facing Diamond Dallas Page tonight instead of Ethan Page. He’s not worried about Rob Van Dam.

Rosemary wants a Demon Collar match against Su Yung, winner take all. That would be all the souls/people I presume?

Jordynne Grace vs. Alexia Nicole

Grace shrugs off the kicks to the leg and hits a one armed delayed vertical suplex. Nicole’s sleeper doesn’t work at all and it’s a giant swing to make it even worse. A clothesline goes even worse for Nicole and Grave hits a torture rack into a spinning powerbomb. The Grace Driver is good for the pin at 3:03.

Rating: D. Grace continues to look dominant and at some point they’ll make her the monster champion that she should be. Sometimes you need a nice squash like this as it’s one of the best ways to keep someone over. She doesn’t have anything going on right now but keeping her dominant on TV like this works just fine.

Josh Alexander gives Ethan Page a pep talk for his match with Van Dam tonight.

Kiera Hogan walked away from Rosemary last week because that’s what Rosemary wanted. She has tried to be friends with everyone around here and it hasn’t worked. Grace comes in to say they are friends but Kiera doesn’t care about her. Grace can die like Allie did.

Ethan Page vs. Rob Van Dam

Alexander is here with Page and the announcers talk about Van Dam’s marijuana enthusiasm as both villains yell at Rob. They’re knocked to the floor as the discussion moves over to ECW and all the great moments Rob had there. An Alexander distraction breaks up the spinning kick to Page’s back and it’s Page taking over in the corner.

A backbreaker and suplex have Van Dam in trouble but he’s back with kicks to the face. Rolling Thunder looks to set up the Five Star but Alexander’s distraction lets Page get up. There’s a bicycle kick to Rob, who is right back with a spinwheel kick. The Five Star (with very little elevation) finishes Page at 6:10.

Rating: D+. It wasn’t terrible or even bad, but it was a 48 year old Van Dam playing the hits while the announcers tried to treat it as anything other than nostalgia/a way to draw a crowd for Philadelphia next week. There’s nothing wrong with Van Dam not being able to do it as well as he used to, but treating him like he’s still the same athlete is hard to take. Bringing Rob back in makes sense as he has star power, but I’m worried about how hard they’re going to push him at this point.

Brian Cage is still injured and starting rehab on his back soon.

Johnny Impact comes up to Michael Elgin and they argue over who injured Cage. Elgin will send him to the hospital to prove he’s right.

Deaners vs. Desi Hit Squad vs. Brent Banks/Aiden Prince vs. Rascalz

Banks flips a lot and dropkicks Raju into the corner so it’s off to Singh as we’re already in the rapid fire offense as no one is going to have time to really showcase themselves. The Squad takes over on Prince with a boot to the face giving Raju two. Prince gets in a kick of his own and the fans want the Deaners, showing that Canadian fans don’t have the best taste. The Deaners come in a few seconds later as everything breaks down with the Rascalz taking over. Wentz hits a big dive onto a bunch of people and Dezmond hits a cartwheel corkscrew dive but Raju uses the distraction to roll Cousin Jake up for the pin at 5:05.

Rating: D+. What am I supposed to say here? The Desi Hit Squad wins (because the Rascalz aren’t allowed to build any momentum) in a match with eight people trying to get stuff in over the course of about five minutes. It’s too much in one match and the Squad winning took away a lot of the energy that the match could have build up.

Killer Kross talks about stealing Kenny the Kendo Stick last week, which he did to prove a point. Now he wants to hear from Eddie Edwards. Tick tock.

LAX is in the Rascalz clubhouse and they talk about lions protecting the stash. Ortiz wants to fight the Rockers, the Eliminators, Bert and Ernie and Tango and Cash. Shots are consumed.

The announcers talk about going to the 2300 Arena next week and say EXTREME about half a dozen times.

Tommy Dreamer/Fallah Bahh/Rich Swann/Willie Mack vs. OVE

OVE Rules, meaning anything goes and Scarlett Bordeaux is here with the non-Ohioans. Joined in progress after a break with Bahh splashing Dave Crist in the corner. It’s time for some chairs with Dave being slammed onto the steel, leaving everyone to head outside. Mack comes back in and slams Sami, setting up a standing moonsault onto Dave. The big flip dive lets Mack knock everyone down, followed by Dave moonsaulting off the top onto everyone else. Jake dives, then Tommy dives as we get in the required exchange of dives out of the way. Dreamer heads to the back to get something as we take a break.

Back with the weapons abounding, including a big ladder that Dreamer pulled out. Dreamer wraps the ladder around his head and does the spinning knockdowns until Fulton gets in a shot to take over. Fulton sets the ladder up on the ramp as Sami and Dave beat on Fallah with a chair. That leaves Mack to pile a bunch of stuff up in the ring, only to take a cutter from Jake for two.

Bahh’s belly to belly onto a trashcan gets two but he’s fine enough to set up some chairs. A superplex to Dave is broken up with Fulton powerbombing Bahh through some chairs. The chair wrapped in barbed wire is sat on Bahh’s chest for a top rope double stomp into a near fall. Swann comes back in (Was he in at all?) and goes to the ladder but Fulton makes the save, allowing Dave to hit a super cutter off the ladder.

Fulton dives off the ladder into a Samoan drop to give Bahh two. Dreamer busts out the Legos and DDTs Sami and Dave onto them for no cover. That leaves the barefooted Bahh to walk onto the Legos but Fulton plants him with a chokeslam. Mack Stuns Fulton onto a chair but Sami blasts Mack with a stop sign. The Cactus Special onto the Legos gives Sami the pin at 16:29.

Rating: C+. It’s a garbage brawl that I’ve seen done a million times but they were putting in some effort and got the time to make it feel more violent. I’m not sure why you would have Mack take the fall when you have Dreamer in there, but they do seem to be teasing a Mack vs. Swann feud. This wasn’t bad, and thank goodness they didn’t put it in the ECW Arena instead.

Overall Rating: D+. I really wasn’t feeling this one as it seems that they’re building up to both Slammiversary but more importantly the 2300 Arena shows. It’s not the worst thing in the world, but I’m worried about how big of an ECW tribute we’ll have to sit through for the next few weeks. This wasn’t terrible, though they’ve lost some momentum from Rebellion.

Results

LAX b. Moose/Josh Alexander – Double faceplant to Alexander

Madison Rayne b. Taya Valkyrie – Half crab

Jordynne Grace b. Alexia Nicole – Grace Driver

Rob Van Dam b. Ethan Page – Five Star Frog Splash

Desi Hit Squad b. Rascalz, Brent Banks/Aiden Prince and Deaners – Rollup to Jake

OVE b. Tommy Dreamer/Fallah Bahh/Rich Swann/Willie Mack – Cactus Special to Mack

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Impact Wrestling – February 15, 2019: Mexico Suits These Guys

IMG Credit: Impact Wrestling

Impact Wrestling
Date: February 15, 2019
Location: Fronton Mexico, Mexico City, Mexico
Commentators: Don Callis, Josh Matthews

We’re still in Mexico City and the big story coming out of last week saw the Lucha Bros become the new Tag Team Champions with about 184 piledrivers. The big question now is where things go from here, though tonight being the Uncaged special should help a lot. That means a stacked card, including the World Cup match (meaning a company vs. company tag) and a four way for the World Title. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening video looks at tonight’s big matches, mainly focusing on the World Cup and the World Title. Makes sense.

Opening sequence.

Knockouts Title: Tessa Blanchard vs. Taya Valkyrie

Street fight with Tessa challenging while wearing jeans and a shirt that her dad wore back in the 80s. Tessa charges up the ramp with a chair but gets taken down for some right hands. They get inside with a table already set up in the corner as Tessa loads up a chair in the corner. Taya runs her over and sends things outside but takes too long posing, allowing Tessa to blast her in the head. A running dropkick drives a chair into Taya’s head into the barricade but the champ is back with a sign shot.

Tessa takes a beer to the face but she wraps a chair around Taya’s neck and drives it into the post. Since this is modern wrestling, Taya is up without much damage done. Back in and we hit the choke with a cable cord and it’s time to rip off Taya’s shirt. Taya finally manages to send her into the chair in the corner, followed by a chair driving a metal sheet between Tessa’s legs. Tessa is right back up and throws in a bunch of chairs, one of which is pelted at her head.

Taya gets thrown onto a pile of chairs though and we take a break. Back with the two of them sitting in the chairs for a slap off until Taya kicks a chair into Tessa’s face for two. A spear drives Taya into the table in the corner but they bounce off for a good visual. It works so well that they do it again and the thing still doesn’t break. Tessa loads up a regular table but gets shoved outside for a big plancha from the top. Back in and Taya hits a top rope double stomp through the table to retain at 17:56.

Rating: B-. They beat each other up here and it felt like a fight, which is exactly the point. Taya needs a fresh challenger and while Tessa is still the best in the whole division, it’s time for someone to take her place. She can be back later on with no issues as she’s that good, though they had a good match here to wrap up the feud.

The announcers preview the show.

GWN Flashback of the Week: Team Impact vs. Team AAA from Bound For Glory 2017. At least it ties into later tonight.

Team Impact is ready to win tonight but they’re not sure on the team captain. Sami Callihan goes to take care of something so Eli Drake takes charge and gives them a pep talk.

Ethan Page vs. Willie Mack

Mack is now Hot Chocolate. Page slugs away to start but Mack does a dancing handstand in the corner because he can. A double nipple twist has Page in more trouble so he grabs a running DDT to take him down. Mack’s suplex puts Page down but a middle rope enziguri of all things (that’s a new one) gives Page two. Mack hits his running strikes in the corner, including the reverse Cannonball. A standing moonsault gets two so Page kicks him in the head a few times. Those have limited effect on Mack’s hard head and the Stunner finishes Page at 5:03.

Rating: C-. Didn’t have time to go anywhere but Mack is ready to break into the next level. That’s the case with every promotion he’s in and for some reason it just never happens. This might be the place though as Mack is getting pushed well enough around here and stays on TV, even in a quick match like this one.

Killer Kross says tonight is like a 3-1 handicap match for Johnny. Everyone pays the toll.

The Crist Brothers follow Mack and seem to jump him.

Team AAA speaks Spanish.

Here’s Sami Callihan for a chat. Everyone knows he and Rich Swann are brothers and what Swann said last week is fake news. Sami has given him multiple chances to join OVE so tonight is the final offer. A serious Swann comes out and throws the shirt away again so the fight is on. Sami gets the better of it and piledrives Swann on the stage, followed by a toss through a table.

World Cup: Team Impact vs. Team AAA

Impact: Fallah Bahh, Eli Drake, Eddie Edwards, Sami Callihan

AAA: Hijo Del Vikingo, Aerostar, Puma King, Psycho Clown

Elimination rules and thankfully we get a mention of Callihan vs. Drake from last year. Clown and Callihan slug it out to start as Callis wonders if Callihan can be traded to Mexico. A middle rope crossbody takes Callihan down and it’s off to Aerostar for a top rope corkscrew crossbody, followed by a Codebreaker in the corner. Drake comes in and hammers away but Aerostar quickly brings in Vikingo.

The pace pics up and the fast tags begin, capped off by King brainbustering Edwards for two. That’s enough to bring Bahh in for the first time with a belly to belly suplex planting King. Everyone comes in for the big staredown but wind up on the floor just as fast. Back in and King snaps off a running hurricanrana to Edwards.

Aerostar hits the first running dive (How did we not get to one of those yet?) and Bahh dives off the apron for a bonus. Vikingo adds a crazy springboard inverted moonsault before going up again, only to get powerslammed down by Drake. It’s time for the kendo stick but Edwards doesn’t like it, allowing King to roll Drake up for the elimination at 9:01.

Back from a break with Callihan chinlocking King until Bahh slams Callihan onto him for a near fall. Since Bahh isn’t very good, a single shot slows him down and it’s off to Vikingo to springboard Codebreak Callihan. Vikingo gets to clean house and kicks Bahh into the corner without much effort. A dive is countered into a powerslam though and Vikingo is out at 15:49. Aerostar comes in for a variety of dropkicks before avoiding a Banzai Drop to pin Bahh at 16:40.

It’s Edwards in now and a rolling cutter takes him down, only to have the Boston Knee Party take care of Aerostar at 17:39. We’re down to King/Clown vs. Callihan/Edwards and King powerbombs Callihan for two. Not to be outdone, Callihan piledrives King for the elimination at 18:39 to continue the rapid fire eliminations. Clown says bring it on and beats both of them up in a hurry until a Boston Knee Party takes him down.

Not so fast though as Sami wants the pin and gets rolled up to make it one on one at 20:06. They slug it out with Eddie being sent outside for a suicide dive. Back in and Clown gets two off Sliced Bread #2 but here’s Drake to hit Edwards with the kendo stick. Clown grabs la majistral for the final pin at 23:12.

Rating: C+. The best thing I can give this one is that it didn’t feel long and the right team won, though it’s not like this means anything long term. To be fair though, it’s not like it was supposed to and the whole World Cup thing is just a nice bit of marketing. All in all, it’s perfectly watchable and that’s not a bad thing to have going for you.

Reno Scumm is coming back. Dang it why?

We look back at the Lucha Bros taking the Tag Team Titles from LAX.

Konnan is going to get LAX one more shot but that’s it.

Allie and Su Yung are panicking about Rosemary, who seems to hack the feed.

Scarlett Bordeaux is in bed in lingerie and promises to make her in-ring debut in Las Vegas.

Next week: Edwards vs. Drake.

Impact Wrestling World Title: Johnny Impact vs. Brian Cage vs. Killer Kross vs. Moose

Impact is defending and it’s one fall to a finish. Moose gets low bridged outside early on and it’s time to kick people in the head. Cage sends the champ outside though and it’s the big flip dive onto all three of them. Back in and it’s a double powerbomb to plant Impact but Moose and Kross fight over the pin. I’m as shocked as you are but the alliance actually continues, this time with a double teaming on Cage.

Shockingly enough, Moose rolls Kross up for two and there’s the first suplex to Moose. Impact gets back up and starts cleaning house until Moose kicks him in the head. The chokebomb out of the corner gets two on Impact but Cage German suplexes both other monsters at the same time. Everyone hits everyone in the face until Impact’s springboard spear hits Cage for a four way knockdown.

It’s Impact up first and they all heads to the corner for the required Tower of Doom. Instead of covering, Kross switches gears a bit with a cross armbreaker on Impact but Cage makes the save with a dragon sleeper to Kross. It’s Kross up again with some suplexes all around but Impact kicks him in the face for two more. A pop up powerbomb into a backsplash gives Moose two, only to walk into the Drill Claw from Cage. Impact is right up with Starship Pain for the pin on Moose at 10:37, just as Cage had Kross pinned off the Drill Claw.

Rating: B-. It was entertaining while it lasted and the more I think about it, the more I think it should have been a bit shorter like this. The problem is that it’s still not a great story and Cage has no reason to be annoyed here because he lost the match completely clean. I’m not sure why this is going to keep going, even though it feels like it has been forever already.

Overall Rating: B+. This was one of the action shows and that’s where Impact works best. The worst match was the short Mack vs. Page match and even that was perfectly watchable. What we got here was almost all wrestling and there’s nothing wrong with that, especially when Impact isn’t the best storytelling company in the world. I had a very good time here and it worked quite well with one of their better shows in a long time.

Results

Taya Valkyrie b. Tessa Blanchard – Top rope double stomp through a table

Willie Mack b. Ethan Page – Stunner

Team AAA b. Team Impact – La majistral to Edwards

Johnny Impact b. Moose, Killer Kross and Brian Cage – Starship Pain to Moose

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 1997 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/11/20/new-paperback-complete-1997-monday-night-raw-reviews/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Impact Wrestling – November 22, 2018: The Discount Version Of NXT

IMG Credit: Impact Wrestling

Impact Wrestling
Date: November 22, 2018
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Don Callis

It’s time for a holiday show and in this case, that might not be the best thing in the world. The biggest story tonight is going to be the turkey suit match, which is one of those traditions that has been around here for years despite not many people seeming to be a fan of the thing. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Team Edwards vs. Team Adonis

Eddie Edwards, Garza Jr., Allie, Fallah Bahh, Richard Justice

Chris Adonis, Caleb Konley, Laurel Van Ness, KM, El Hijo Del Fantasma

The loser of the fall wears a turkey suit and there’s food at ringside, along with Eli Drake. We’re not ready yet though as the teams sit down at the food tables as Drake insists that everyone has to put on the suit if they lose. He has a statement for JB to read, which pretty much just says everyone play nice.

Justice sticks his finger in Konley’s mouth to start and gets two off a rollup. Laurel comes in and jumps on Justice’s back so it’s off to the women for a change. KM and Bahh are up next with some shots to Bahh’s head taking us to a break. Back with Bahh crossbodying KM and bringing in Garza….WHO TAKES OFF HIS PANTS! I’m rather thankful.

Garza gets punched down though and it’s time for the heel beatdown. Adonis comes in for two off a legdrop and it’s time for a bearhug (on a guy with a bad shoulder). That goes nowhere and the hot tag brings in Eddie to clean house. Everything breaks down in a hurry and KM gets crushed between Justice and Bahh.

We get the big crash to the floor and Justice falls off the apron, only to be caught without much effort. Allie dives onto everyone to break up the pile and everyone is down. Back in and Adonis can’t grab the Adonis Lock, allowing Eddie to roll him up for the pin at 16:04, meaning Adonis gets to wear the suit.

Rating: C-. Oh what were you expecting here? This was all in good fun and nothing more than a comedy match. The match was just there for the sake of having a one off match for a holiday special and as a result, it’s really hard to be harsh on it. Adonis having to wear the suit is fine and it continues a (rather goofy) tradition. It wasn’t anything good, but it’s perfectly harmless.

Post break, Adonis refuses to wear the suit. Security actually stops him as the referee holds up the suit like an executioner’s ax. After a lot of persuading and a GOBBLE GOBBLE (One of us?) chant, Adonis finally puts it on and walks around a bit. Adonis isn’t cool with the chants though and the required food fight, with Adonis hitting Drake in the face with a pie, ends the show. This was actually entertaining as they just went with the simple comedy and it worked perfectly well.

Back in the present, Bahh selects his first name, and it’s KM. As you might have guessed, KM comes in to talk about Thanksgiving dinner.

Drake wants the interviewer to say Spin the Wheel, Make the Deal as the tumbler is spun. He gets….Katarina, who is there too. Her great grandfather was a pilgrim so Drake should be rather happy.

We see about five minutes of the 2007 edition, which ended in AJ Styles wearing the suit. See, WWE makes him a year long World Champion and Impact….makes him look like an idiot. Totally the same thing.

Video on Brian Cage cashing in Option C to challenge for the World Title at Homecoming.

Bahh, after being convinced that he can’t get Katarina flowers, draws Japanese comedy wrestler Kikutaro, who wears a pink mask and shouts a lot.

Here’s Scarlett Bordeaux to dance with a rather fetching burlesque troupe.

More Scarlett fan submissions, including one from Shark Boy.

Drake picks a name, doesn’t like it and picks another one, drawing Jake Crist. OVE comes in and Drake tells them to get this right. Sami tells Jake to not screw this up, or he has to eat the entire Thanksgiving dinner.

Some wrestlers and personalities give their favorite Thanksgiving memories.

Same Cage/Impact video.


Drake says Bahh is thankful to OVE for helping with his English (Now he can say EVERY BAHH.) and draws Rohit Raju. Geez we can’t even escape these guys on a holiday show. The Desi Hit Squad comes in to say if you get one, you get them both. That’s a positive thing?

More Thanksgiving memories.

Video on Tessa Blanchard vs. Taya Valkyrie.

Bahh’s final pick is Alisha Edwards. She comes in and doesn’t like Bahh’s joke.

Drake’s final pick is Glenn Gilbertti, the Disco Inferno. He wants to impress Scarlett with CGI: class, good looks and intelligence. Then the two of them will get married so Drake can be the best man.

Ultimate X is back at Homecoming.

Gilbertti takes credit for inventing Ultimate X after being told that he couldn’t throw X-Division wrestlers off the building.

Video on the history of Option C.

Team Drake (with Gilbertti looking a bit like a middle aged Terry Funk) promises to win. Scarlett comes in to say she’s scouting talent. She likes stuffing over turkey.

Tessa vs. Taya video.

Team Bahh gets a pep talk, featuring the word BAHH over and over again. KM translates, which doesn’t make it much better.

Team Drake vs. Team Bahh

Eli Drake, Jake Crist, Katarina, Rohit Raju, Glenn Gilbertti

Fallah Bahh, KM, Dezmond Xavier, Alisha Edwards, Kikutaro

Before the match, we get a pledge to wear the turkey suit if you get pinned. Whatever keeps the match from happening I guess. Katarina throws Alisha down to start and getting two off a Samoan drop. Alisha fights up and brings in Jake to face Kikutaro, who armdrags him down and hands it off to Dezmond. Drake comes in for his pop up reverse powerslam and hands it off to Raju as the fast tags continue. Rohit gets beaten up as well so Gama Singh gets in to give him a pep talk.

This time it’s Bahh getting beaten down in the corner, including a few right hands from Gilbertti. A double crossbody crushes Gilbertti and Drake so it’s off to KM and Raju. Everything breaks down and we get the Human Centipede of figure four neck locks, capped off by Bahh turning them all over in a Boston crab. Cue Scarlett in a pilgrim hat to stop the proceedings and we take a break.

Back with Scarlett sitting on a chair on the stage and Kikutaro charging into Drake’s raised boot in the corner. Drake throws on Scarlett’s pilgrim hat and it’s time for the rotating stomps to Kikutaro. An enziguri to Raju allows the hot tag to Dezmond (though you couldn’t tell by the crowd reactions). The villains are sent to the floor for a big flip dive from Xavier and Bahh knocks Drake onto the pile.

Rating: D. What else were you expecting here? This was harmless and stupid, but it’s not like it’s worth getting angry about. Gilbertti wearing the suit is fine for a funny ending and Bahh, the biggest star on the face team, gets an easy win. There’s nothing worth complaining about here and I think everyone knows it.

Post match Gilbertti’s partners leave and he continues the tradition of refusing to wear the suit. Scarlett comes to ringside and says she finds a man who doesn’t take himself seriously rather sexy. The suit goes on and she says he looks like an idiot as Gilbertti is greeted with a GOBBLE GOBBLE chant to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. Getting annoyed at this show would be like getting annoyed at the post-Takeover episodes of NXT. This isn’t meant to be anything more than a filler show for the holiday and they didn’t present it as anything other than that. It’s not like anyone is going to be watching so why bother wasting storylines? Just a simple comedy show here and there’s nothing wrong with that. It’s back to serious next week and the audience will be back then too so this was the right call.

Results

Team Bahh b. Team Drake – Banzai Drop to Gilbertti

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 1997 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/11/20/new-paperback-complete-1997-monday-night-raw-reviews/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6