Monday Night Raw – May 30, 2022: In A Word, Frustrating

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 30, 2022
Location: Wells Fargo Arena, Des Moines, Iowa
Commentators: Byron Saxton, Corey Graves, Jimmy Smith

It’s the go home show for Hell In A Cell and there are four matches announced for the card. I’m not sure what they are waiting for with adding on more matches, but you have to think that something takes place this week. However, it is also Memorial Day, meaning there is a good chance that very little is going to happen here. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here is Becky Lynch to get things going. She hasn’t been out here to start things off in a bit and she knows the people here are glad she has lost everything. Lynch doesn’t care what these people think, because she collects enemies. We flash back to Money in the Bank 2020, with Asuka winning the briefcase. Then Lynch handed her the Raw Women’s Title because she had to go become a mother.

That made Asuka a selfish monster….and here is Asuka to interrupt. She mocks Becky for being a baby and promises to win the title on Sunday. Cue Bianca Belair, who isn’t happy with Asuka kicking her last week and isn’t too fond of Becky either. She is sure the title isn’t going anywhere though and the fight is on, with Asuka hip attacking Becky to the floor, leaving the other two in the ring.

Asuka vs. Bianca Belair

Non-title and Becky Lynch is on commentary. They flip and jump over each other to start until Asuka kicks her in the ribs. Back up and Belair gets to the middle rope where she, as always, tells Asuka what she can kiss. After the backflip over Asuka, Belair gets pulled down for a kneebar, followed by a guillotine choke. That’s reversed into a suplex for two but another suplex sends both of them crashing to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Asuka hitting a German suplex into the running hip attack for two. Belair catches her on top though, only to moonsault backwards, allowing Asuka to hit a middle rope dropkick for two. A missed charge in the corner lets Belair try the KOD, but Asuka flips out and lands on her feet. Asuka comes up holding her knee though (Becky is VERY pleased) and needs a breather on the floor. Back in and a quick knee gives Asuka two but the Asuka Lock is countered. Asuka tries a rollup, which is quickly stacked up to give Belair the pin at 13:05.

Rating: C+. This match and the last segment let me figure out what I don’t care for with Belair. Her matches are usually good (this one was) and she can do things no one else can do, but none of her matches feel natural. Every time she does something it feels like it’s “ok, time to do this” or “this is where I do thing #3”. Between the kiss it deal or the moonsault off the ropes or the dance or whatever, it feels like she is walking step by step through a script that was planned in advance. It feels robotic and very rarely does she shake that off.

Post match Becky comes in and lays them both out.

Mysterios/Ezekiel vs. Kevin Owens/Alpha Academy

Gable headlocks Rey to start but can’t hold onto him, allowing Dominik to come in instead. Dominik takes Gable to the corner and runs the ropes for a wristdrag. Everything breaks down and a triple dropkick sends Otis outside. Gable knocks Dominik off the ropes though and a whip sends him into the barricade as we take a break.

Back with Rey dropkicking Owens to break up a Sharpshooter, allowing the tag to Ezekiel. Everything breaks down and Ezekiel cleans house with some Stinger Splashes. A spinning powerbomb gets two on Gable and a hurricanrana sets up a missed 610 on Owens. That leaves Owens to superkick Gable by mistake and it’s a double 619 to rock Gable again. Ezekiel’s spinning suplex finishes Gable at 8:32.

Rating: C+. Pretty nice action here and that shouldn’t be a surprise. Owens losing it more and more over Ezekiel is some nice stuff, even if it makes me want to watch Bobby Heenan trying to find out who Giant Machine really is. I’m still not caring about the Mysterios all that much, but at least it’s better than watching them deal with Veer Mahaan.

Post match Owens is ticked and wrecks the announcers’ table as the Academy isn’t pleased.

We recap Cody Rhodes vs. Seth Rollins.

Here is Cody for a chat. Cody talks about having the potential to do great things and how his father knew how to see that potential in others. His father told him about the potential in Seth Rollins and then one day Cody was facing Rollins at Wrestlemania. That made Cody nervous, because he couldn’t come back with a loss. Cody didn’t lose there and he didn’t lose at Wrestlemania Backlash.

Now they’re going to the Cell and Cody is going to be able to lose all of his self control because Rollins will be locked inside with a man who wants to hurt him. Cue Rollins to interrupt through the crowd to say he just doesn’t like Cody. All Rollins hears in his sleep is CODY CODY CODY and he can’t stand it any longer.

Six years ago, Cody left WWE and found some friends who wanted to tear down everything Rollins built. Now Cody is back, but he doesn’t get to tear down Rollins’ kingdom. You don’t get to take a sledgehammer to Rollins’ throne and then try to take it from him. On Sunday, Rollins is going to end him and we can wake up from this American nightmare. Cody asks what is stopping him from coming after Seth right now.

Rollins seems to have reality set in on him and Cody takes the jacket off. Rollins comes to the barricade but turns away, only to have Cody come a charging. They fight back to ringside with Cody driving him through the barricade. Referees break it up but they keep fighting, then referees break it up but they keep fighting. They’re finally split apart and kept apart as the fans approve. As they should, as this was the kind of personal brawl that they needed. Rollins now has given a reason to hate Cody and that opens things up a lot more. Good stuff.

Doudrop vs. Alexa Bliss

Nikki Ash is here with Doudrop. Bliss gets powered into the corner and taken down for an early two. Back up and Bliss headscissors her into the corner, setting up a some basement dropkicks. Doudrop runs her over again but misses a Vader Bomb, allowing Bliss to go up, take out Ash, and hit Twisted Bliss for the pin at 3:17.

Rating: D+. I can’t get over how ridiculous the Nikki visuals are, as you have Bliss in the standard (or close enough) gear, Doudrop as the monster, and Ash still in the superhero gear. The match itself was your usual big vs. little match, which only kind of works most of the time. I don’t quite buy Bliss pinning Doudrop after a splash but it isn’t like Doudrop has meant anything in months.

Last week, MVP beat Bobby Lashley and made the Lashley vs. Omos match on Sunday into a handicap match.

It’s time for MizTV, because it feels like we have one of these every week. Miz plugs the season premiere of MizTV next week but here are the Street Profits to interrupt. They talk about Hell in a Cell on Sunday and hype up the card but realize they need to ask Miz about the show. Miz is ready to answer but IT DOESN’T MATTER WHAT HE THINKS. Miz puts his hand up and they mock him asking what that means.

Then the 24/7 goons come running in and the Profits get involved as well. It turns into a multi person brawl until Tamina hits a Samoan drop on Dana Brooke to win the title. Tamina picks Akira Tozawa up and kisses him, only to get taken down in a backslide to give Tozawa the pin and the title. So what in the world was the original point of this segment again?

We recap Mustafa Ali’s issues since he came back to WWE as he tries to win the US Title.

Mustafa Ali vs. Ciampa

Theory is on commentary and if Ali wins, he gets a US Title shot. Ali sends him into the corner to start but Ciampa is right back with a knee to the face for two. Ciampa elbows him down and grabs a chinlock before stomping on Ali’s head. The second chinlock doesn’t last as long as Ali is back up with a kick to the face to send Ciampa outside. There’s a suicide dive, with Ali almost going head first into the announcers’ table. Ali goes up but Theory pulls him off the ropes for the DQ at 3:24.

Rating: C-. Well at least Ciampa didn’t get pinned again. I know it’s false hope but my goodness I was hoping he could do SOMETHING on the show. Instead, he might as well be in the corner to my left, because he is little more than a background guy while the real stars are out there. Nothing match, but at least Ali and Theory are getting to do something.

Post match, Theory lays out Ali and says we’ll do the title match right now. Oh and Ciampa disappeared because he means nothing.

US Title: Theory vs. Mustafa Ali

Theory is defending and Ali pulls himself up, only to get thrown back down. A whip into the corner rocks Ali again but he manages a superkick. Ali goes up but gets crotched, setting up the A Town Down to retain the title at 1:43.

Hold on though as here is Adam Pearce to say let’s run it back on Sunday.

Riddle and Shinsuke Nakamura dub themselves the Bronin and Ronin and promise to take the Tag Team Titles.

Usos vs. Shinsuke Nakamura/Riddle

Non-title but a CHAMPIONS CONTENDERS match. Jey gets taken into the wrong corner to start and it’s time for alternating kicks to put him in trouble. That’s broken up and it’s off to Jimmy for a Samoan drop. Jey comes back in to whip Riddle hard into the corner but another kick gets Riddle out of trouble. Nakamura comes back in with Good Vibrations to Jimmy. There’s the sliding German suplex but Jey comes back in to cut Nakamura off. The Superfly Splash gives Jey two and we take a break.

Back with Nakamura getting over to Riddle for the hot tag but the hanging DDT is broken up. Nakamura tags himself back in as Riddle is being suplexed to the floor and it’s Kinshasa to Jey. Jimmy makes a save to leave everyone down but it’s Riddle back in with the snap powerslams. Now the hanging DDT can plant Jey, only to have Jimmy hit Riddle with the scooter for the DQ at 11:35.

Rating: C+. Thirty minutes or so? Is that how long it was since they did THE EXACT SAME ENDING? You have a match for a title shot and someone gets disqualified to earn said title shot and they do it TWICE IN THREE MATCHES??? That is another level of lame booking and I can’t even be shocked that they did it. The match itself was good as you probably expected, but that ending was so dumb that it took away any interest I had in what they were doing.

Post match Nakamura breaks up the double Superfly Splash and Riddle hits the super RKO on Jimmy.

Mustafa Ali is ready for his title match on Sunday. He keeps getting knocked down but he is going keep getting back up and win the US Title in his hometown. Then Theory jumps him again and takes a selfie with the title over Ali. Normally this would set up a big title win for Ali, but I’d hope you aren’t that gullible.

Hell In A Cell rundown, including Judgment Day vs. AJ Styles/Finn Balor/Liv Morgan.

Video on Memorial Day.

Liv Morgan vs. Rhea Ripley

Morgan has been standing in the ring for about ten minutes now, following Ali’s promo, the pay per view rundown, a commercial and the Memorial Day video. Ripley had it better, having only stood there for the commercial and Memorial Day video. Morgan gets knocked into the corner to start but comes back with a choke. Some rams into the corner can’t break it up so Ripley drops backwards onto her for the real break. Ripley takes it to the floor and puts Liv on the apron, only to get caught in a hurricanrana. That isn’t working for Morgan either though as she gets dropped on the floor as we take a break.

Back with Morgan in trouble as Damian Priest and AJ Styles are at ringside. Ripley yells about how Liv dragged her down to her level as I would like to again point out YOU WERE A TEAM FOR A MONTH AND A HALF! STOP ACTING LIKE IT WAS SOMETHING! Morgan fights up and sends her outside for a high crossbody but Priest trips Morgan up. Styles cuts that off and Morgan reverses Riptide into a Backstabber for the pin at 10:08.

Rating: C-. Sure why not. You have Ripley, who is FINALLY getting pushed as the monster that she should be and she loses to perennial loser Liv Morgan to set up a six person tag on Sunday. Morgan even overcomes the interference to win to make it even worse. I’m sure Ripley will be fine, but my goodness stop giving people losses like this and the acting like they mean nothing.

Post match Priest takes out Styles. Cue Finn Balor to take him out, allowing Morgan to dropkick Ripley so our plucky band of heroes can stand tall.

We look at the Cody/Seth brawl again.

And now, a contract signing because yes, this is how we’re ending the show. Bobby Lashley, Omos and MVP all come to the ring with Adam Pearce in charge. MVP promises to destroy Lashley in the Cell and says there is no Almighty Era without him. This Sunday, it ends once and for all. MVP signs and he hands it to Omos to do the same. Lashley says he never needed MVP but MVP says he’s talking too much so sign the contract.

The contract is signed and Pearce goes to wrap it up but MVP says we’re not waiting for Sunday. Security comes in and are cleared out just as fast…and here is Cedric Alexander to help take Lashley down. That’s fine with Lashley, who drops Alexander but gets kicked in the face by Omos. A table is set up in the corner and Omos loads up the powerslam, only to have Lashley slip out and spear him through it to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This is a great example of a show where the wrestling itself worked but everything else dragged it down. Having two matches end in DQ to set up title matches, with a title match squeezed in between, is hardly thought out planning and they kept the dumb rolling by having Morgan beat Ripley. If you want to do something with Morgan, send out ANYONE other than Ripley for her to beat. Were Sonya Deville and Carmella busy?

That being said, there were good parts of the show, including the Cody vs. Seth brawl and a fair few of the matches. The problem, as usual, was most of that last hour, as it is clear that they are front loading the show and ending it with the lamer stuff. That makes for a very long time to wrap things up and that was the case again here. While there was good wrestling, it was surrounded by stuff that was either annoying or just bad, and that makes for a pretty frustrating show.

Results
Bianca Belair b. Asuka – Rollup
Mysterios/Ezekiel b. Kevin Owens/Alpha Academy – Twisting suplex to Gable
Alexa Bliss b. Doudrop – Twisted Bliss
Mustafa Ali b. Ciampa via DQ when Theory interfered
Theory b. Mustafa Ali – A Town Down
Riddle/Shinsuke Nakamura b. Usos via DQ when Jimmy used the scooter
Liv Morgan b. Rhea Ripley – Backstabber

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – May 16, 2022: Plans Change

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 16, 2022
Location: Scope Arena, Norfolk, Virginia
Commentators: Jimmy Smith, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

We’re in for a big grudge match with Omos vs. Bobby Lashley inside a cage. This is the third match between the two of them after they split the first two, though I’m not sure if it’s the best idea with the Cell pay per view a few weeks away. Other than that, we will probably get another push towards the Usos vs. RKBro on Friday, which will totally be the big conclusive ending. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a long recap of Omos vs. Bobby Lashley.

Here’s what’s coming on the rest of the show.

Omos vs. Bobby Lashley

Inside a cage with MVP in Omos’ corner. Before the match, MVP runs down the history and goes over the ways you can win the match (pinfall, submission, escape) before promising a lot of violence. Hold on though as Cedric Alexander jumps Lashley from behind in the aisle and the big brawl is on. We take a break and come back with the opening bell, as Lashley hammers away until MVP gets in a cheap shot from the floor.

Lashley grabs a choke anyway but Omos hits him in the chest to break that up. Another MVP cheap shot lets Omos choke away and then take it into the corner for a running splash. MVP tries to interfere again but Lashley grabs him by the arm for a ram into the cage. The spear takes Omos down for two and Lashley elbows him in the face. Lashley looks ready to finish but has to cut off Cedric Alexander, who is pulled down into the cage. Omos boots Lashley in the face and throws him through the cage, allowing Lashley to step outside and win at 7:32.

Rating: C-. This felt like the last third (or even half) of a cage match but they were so rushed through everything that almost nothing had a chance to make an impact. They had a seven minute match with multiple interferences and a screwy finish. I know they’re a bit rushed, but could you slow down at least a little bit? The ending was a good way to protect Omos, but Lashley was going even with him throughout at worst so I’m not sure how much the protection helps anyway.

Long recap of Mustafa Ali vs. Miz/Theory.

Theory vs. Mustafa Ali

Non-title….and Theory says hang on a second. He thinks we need a special referee for this match, so here is Miz to replace the referee already in the ring. Hold on again though as Theory is using Vince McMahon’s advice of “expect the unexpected”. Therefore, Ali has a different opponent.

Veer Mahaan vs. Mustafa Ali

Miz is guest referee. Ali goes after him to start but gets knocked away. Some superkicks stagger Veer so Theory trips Ali up (Miz doesn’t mind). Veer gets low bridged to the floor and some dropkicks make it worse, but Miz gets in the way of Ali’s dive. Miz shoves Ali and the distraction lets Veer hit the Million Dollar Arm. The Cervical Clutch finishes for Mahaan at 2:47, as Ali’s punishment continues.

Post match the beating continues but the Mysterios run out for the save and knock Mahaan off the apron. The throw everyone else in the pot feud continues.

Becky Lynch has seen Sasha Banks and Naomi leaving the building before the Six Pack Challenge. Lynch is going to just be the new #1 contender and takes the night off, but Adam Pearce makes Lynch vs. Asuka for the #1 contendership tonight instead. So they advertised a Six Pack Challenge and then changed it inside of 50 minutes. That’s a new mark even for them.

Riddle vs. Jimmy Uso

Jey Uso is here with his brother but there is no Randy Orton because of a family commitment. Jimmy starts with the kicks but gets caught in a triangle choke to the floor. A Jey distraction breaks up the apron kick though, meaning Riddle kicks Jey instead. Jimmy gets in a dive and Riddle is sent into the steps as we take a break. Back with Jimmy hitting another enziguri, setting up the running Umaga Attack for two.

The chinlock goes on but Riddle is back up with a few shots of his own. As the Countdown To Cody clock comes up (before his ten o’clock appearance), the pop up Samoan drop gives Jimmy two. Jimmy goes up top but has to break up the super RKO attempt, only to have the Superfly Splash hit knees. A rollup has Riddle in trouble but the referee catches the interference, earning Jey an ejection. Riddle small packages Jimmy for the pin at 10:32.

Rating: C+. I wasn’t all that interested when the match was another tag match preview between two singles wrestlers but at least it wound up being pretty good. Riddle beating the Usos on his own doesn’t exactly make the Usos look great, but maybe they have something better planned for Smackdown. I still don’t buy the titles being unified on TV, though Friday should have the big fight feeling.

Video on AJ Styles/Finn Balor/Liv Morgan’s lack of luck against the Judgment Day.

Earlier today, Morgan was upset about Rhea Ripley when Los Lotharios came in to offer her a spot in the Kiss Cam. That’s a no, but AJ Styles and Finn Balor came in to chase them off. The guys offer her a spot in their corner tonight but she’ll think about it.

The Judgment Day is rather happy with how everything is going but Edge knows that there are some people who want in. They know everyone wants power, so anyone who wants to come in and move to the next level is welcome. It could even be you, AJ Styles. They could use his athleticism, so join him on top of the mountain. Either be by their side or at their feet, because they aren’t stopping.

AJ Styles/Finn Balor vs. Los Lotharios

Liv Morgan is here with Styles and Balor, apparently having made up her mind at some point today, because saying “I’m in” was too much to ask. Humberto actually stomps Styles down into the corner to start and it’s off to Angel to pound on the back. The abdominal stretch goes on, with Humberto getting in a kick to the ribs for a bonus. Styles fights up and brings in Balor to clean house, setting up the double slingshot dives to send us to a break.

Back with Humberto working on a half crab before Angel comes in for a double half crab. Styles powers out and brings in Balor to clean house. Angel actually cuts that off with a superkick and hands it back to Humberto. The moonsault hits raised boots (with Humberto taking a huge bump off the impact) and it’s the shotgun dropkick to Humberto in the corner. AJ Phenomenal Forearms Angel and it’s the Coup de Grace to finish Humberto at 9:15.

Rating: C+. Los Lotharios are a good team most of the time but in this case, they went with the right call of having AJ and Balor take them down. There is almost no way to imagine a midcard team beating a pair of former World Champions so don’t bother going nuts with it. At least it should be good when Balor or Styles joins up with Edge and company.

Too Sweeting ensues after the match.

Kevin Owens, in a Sami Zayn Forever shirt, meets the Alpha Academy, who has the results of Ezekiel’s DNA tests. They open the envelope….but the results have been contaminated by the presence of BARBECUE SAUCE on the sample. Otis is immediately blamed but Gable tries to keep things calm. Next weeks, Gable promises to expose Ezekiel for the fraud that he is. Tonight though, Gable is going to beat it out of him in the ring. Owens: “THAT’S WHAT YOU SAY EVERY WEEK!”

We recap Sonya Deville losing her job as a WWE boss last week, followed by losing to Alexa Bliss in about thirty seconds.

Alexa Bliss vs. Sonya Deville

Deville gets slapped in the face to start as the match has already lasted longer than last week’s. Bliss takes her down with a legsweep but misses the standing moonsault. A running knee gives Deville two and the chinlock goes on. Another running knee blasts Bliss so Deville goes to unhook a turnbuckle pad. The distracted referee misses Deville hitting a clean spinebuster but runs over for a delayed two. Bliss hits a DDT for the pin at 4:01.

Rating: C-. They had a bit of something here with the delayed cover, but it’s hard to get into the idea of Deville being screwed over. She was more interesting when she was serious a few years ago, and the idea of her getting what happened to her over and over again is only going to get so much of my attention. The match itself wasn’t great, but Bliss is still probably shaking off some ring rust.

Post match Deville yells at the referee and then slaps him.

We recap Seth Rollins attacking Cody Rhodes and Stomping him on the announcers’ table.

Here is Cody Rhodes for a chat. He has been told that Seth Rollins is not here tonight but he hopes that Rollins is listening. Last week, Rollins poured gasoline on the fire but the reality is that Rollins is his own biggest threat. Rollins has built his own purgatory and wants to pull Rhodes down in with him. We flash back to 2011, when Rollins arrived with the rest of the Shield, with Rhodes as one of the bitter guys in the back. Rollins went on a rocket to the top by shattering the glass ceiling, which Rhodes never knew was there in the first place.

Rhodes’ story is a little different. He lost a lot and worked his way up, even if he was looking at the lights most nights. Now he has a second chance, and he isn’t taking it for granted. Rollins isn’t denying him a second chance so Rollins will have to kill him. So let’s run it back one more time…..inside the Cell. Rollins, who seems to be backstage, pops up to say Rhodes is nuts because anyone inside that Cell with him is changed. The match is on. I’d again like to point out that Rhodes has looked and sounded like a star since he returned. That makes all the difference in the world.

Asuka is giddy about getting to face Becky Lynch tonight.

Ezekiel vs. Chad Gable

Kevin Owens is on commentary and Otis is in Gable’s corner. Before the match, Owens doesn’t want to see a photo of Ezekiel and Elias together. Gable takes him down by the arm to start but Ezekiel is back up with an armdrag. That doesn’t work for Gable, who wants some SHOOSHING, only to have Ezekiel come back with a Gory Stretch. Gable slips out and gets into the ropes, with Ezekiel being sent outside.

Otis drives Ezekiel into the apron and we take a break. Back with Gable working on the arm but Ezekiel comes up with a clothesline. A spinebuster gets two and the jumping knee gets the same. Gable sends him into the corner for two but Ezekiel comes out with a kick to the chest. Otis’ distraction lets Gable grab a rollup, which is reversed into another rollup to give Ezekiel the pin at 10:59.

Rating: C. The more I see of Ezekiel, the more I like him. It isn’t like Elias was tearing the house down every week in the ring so there isn’t much of a bar to clear. Ezekiel had a perfectly watchable match here and is different enough than Elias to make it a bit more interesting. Not exactly a classic, but Ezekiel is an interesting enough change of pace for the time being.

R-Truth finally serves Akira Tozawa with his divorce papers and then runs off. Dana Brooke comes in to thank Truth for serving Reggie last week, but Truth wants to consummate with the 24/7 Title. Dana runs off and bumps into Carmella. Insults ensue, including Dana saying Carmella hasn’t mattered since the Guy With No Chin was here. Truth runs up and asks Carmella for help getting the title back. Sure, but she wants Dana Brooke when the time is right. As we continue adding people to this thing.

Here is Lacey Evans, who is introduced as a mother, daughter, Marine and more. Evans puts over the military and thanks them for everything they do. She is proud of what she has done and knows she has a long way to go, but no one in the back is any better than she is. I’m still not sure what they’re doing with Evans and I don’t think WWE does either.

Riddle is ready for the Usos.

The Usos are ready for Riddle.

Becky Lynch vs. Asuka

The winner gets a shot at Bianca Belair, at ringside, at Hell In A Cell. Becky starts fast but gets caught with the running hip attack on the apron. They go to the floor, where Becky hits a suplex into the barricade as we take a break. Back with Asuka getting two off a backslide and kicking Becky in the head. A knee to the face sets up a German suplex and a sliding knee gives Asuka two.

Becky gets in a running shot of her own for two and frustration begins to set in. A rollup is countered into the Asuka Lock but Becky flips backwards for the cover to escape. The cross armbreaker sends Becky to the ropes so she heads outside to yell at Belair. Asuka follows her out, earning herself a whip into Belair. That’s enough to bring Belair to the apron, allowing Becky to grab Asuka’s umbrella. That takes a bit too long though and it’s the green mist into a buzzsaw kick to give Asuka the pin at 9:52.

Rating: B-. They didn’t have time to get great here but it was a good win to build Asuka back up and get her ready for the title match next month. Becky’s slide continues, but she is so far and away established as a top star that it doesn’t matter. This felt like a big enough main event, though I could go for the pay per view version again.

The referee doesn’t seem interested in the fact that Lynch is green to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. This wasn’t exactly a strong show but the whole ordeal with Naomi/Sasha Banks walking out kind of turned parts of the show upside down. They started moving towards the Cell, but I still don’t know what the biggest match on the show is supposed to be. That is the problem with the lack of a World Champion, though it is likely to stay that way for a long time to come. For now, this worked well enough, even if nothing was exactly a show stealing classic. They still don’t have the terrible stuff and that is an important level to reach.

Results
Bobby Lashley b. Omos – Lashley escaped the cage
Veer Mahaan b. Mustafa Ali – Cervical Clutch
Riddle b. Jimmy Uso – Small package
AJ Styles/Finn Balor b. Los Lotharios – Coup de Grace to Humberto
Alexa Bliss b. Sonya Deville – DDT
Ezekiel b. Chad Gable – Rollup
Asuka b. Becky Lynch – Kick to the head

 

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – May 9, 2022: Ye Olde Bad Third Hour

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 9, 2022
Location: XL Center, Hartford, Connecticut
Commentators: Jimmy Smith, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

We’re done with Wrestlemania Backlash and now it is time to start getting ready for Hell In A Cell. This means that we are likely in for MORE rematches, as WWE continues to get more time out of their one set of ideas. Not much happened last night on the Raw side, but Cody Rhodes’ rise continues. Let’s get to it.

Here is Wrestlemania Backlash if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of last night’s main event, with Roman Reigns pinning Riddle so the Bloodline could beat RKBro/Drew McIntyre.

Here is RKBro for a chat. Randy Orton talks about how they came up short last night, but that was just a battle and they will win the war. The original plan was for a Tag Team Title unification match, but Roman Reigns cut that off because he knows the Usos can’t beat RKBro. That’s why they’re going to Smackdown this week and DEMANDING that Reigns allow the match. If Reigns doesn’t say yes, it shows how little he believes in his cousins.

Cue the Street Profits, who are scheduled to challenge RKBro later tonight. They are going to be winning the titles tonight and then unifying them against the Usos because they want the titles and the smoke. Riddle: “RKBro 4:20 says we just smoked your a****”. I think that’s a yes. To a match that was already set.

Tag Team Titles: Street Profits vs. RKBro

RKBro is defending and Ford takes Riddle down early to start, setting up Ford’s version of Randy Orton’s pose. Back up and Riddle tries an armbar, allowing Riddle to mock Orton’s pose for a bonus. It’s off to Dawkins, who gets taken into the corner so Orton can come in. The assisted Floating Bro gets two as Riddle comes back in and sends Dawkins outside. The penalty kick is blocked though and Ford hits the big flipping dive to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Riddle fighting out of a chinlock but getting taken back into the corner to keep him in trouble. Riddle flips out of a suplex though and the hot tag brings in Orton to clean house. The hanging DDT plants Dawkins and it’s right back to Riddle, who accidentally dives onto Orton on the floor. Back in and the frog splash gives Ford two on Riddle with Orton making a VERY last second save. Ford goes up again but this time the frog splash is countered into an RKO to give Riddle the pin at 10:15.

Rating: C+. Those RKOs out of nowhere are still great and that was the case for the pin here, as Riddle makes up for mistakenly taken out Orton earlier. This should be enough to set up the Tag Team Title match, likely inside the Cell, in the match that shouldn’t have been initially advertised for last night. Still though, nice enough match here and Orton’s reactions are getting louder and louder.

We get a….my goodness we get an old school platform style interview (platform, edge of the stage, same thing) with Theory. He isn’t worried about defending the US Title against Cody Rhodes later tonight and is the youngest United States Champion for a reason. Is it because every previous champion has been older than him? He is the future and the future is Theory.

Here are Edge (who has hacked his hair off) and company, now including Rhea Ripley, for a chat. Edge talks about how he listened to the fans for years and all it got him is a Hall of Fame ring. He is bigger than the Hall of Fame. You can point at any part of him and he has had surgery on it. Everyone here tries to stand by their principles and then go home like a bunch of keyboard warriors. Edge holds a mirror up to all of them and they see someone ugly and wrong.

Damian Priest says the truth hurts and while he and Edge could destroy everyone’s favorites, but now they have Rhea Ripley by their side. Ripley says this was the easiest decision of her life because she wanted to be like them. She is done signing autographs at the airport and then seeing them sold on eBay.

That brings her to Liv Morgan and tonight it is time for Liv’s destruction. Edge talks about everyone believing that Ripley was holding Liv down and takes credit for slitting Liv and Rhea up. He saw potential in Ripley and wants her to run everything over. This movement isn’t done and they are looking for more….and here is Liv Morgan to interrupt.

Liv Morgan vs. Rhea Ripley

Ripley throws her into the corner to start and hits some shoulders to the ribs but Morgan is back with a springboard hurricanrana. That earns her a kick to the chest and some right hands on the mat, setting up the bodyscissors. Liv fights out of the Riptide and kicks away, setting up the springboard Codebreaker for her own two. Ripley knocks her back down and grabs the Prism Trap for the tap at 5:40.

Rating: C-. Hey remember when These two were partners for like a month and then lost their two title shots and then they split up and it was nowhere near as big a deal as WWE presented it as being? Well this was Ripley winning the singles match between the two of them. I don’t think this goes anywhere else, save for having Liv as the designated woman in mixed tags as a group of guys go after Edge N Pals, assuming that has any value.

Post match Edge tells Ripley to put the hold on again so Liv taps again. Cue Finn Balor, with AJ Styles, because it’s his turn now.

Finn Balor vs. Damian Priest

Priest throws him into the corner to start and seems to be rather pleased with himself to start. Some more striking and pounding has Balor in trouble but he comes back with a dropkick to the knee. Some shoulders to the ribs in the corner have Priest in trouble and Balor counters a chokeslam into a rollup for two. There’s the Sling Blade to send Priest outside but Ripley gets in the way of a dive. That allows Edge to come in with the spear on Balor for the DQ at 4:19.

Rating: C. This didn’t have the time to go anywhere but it makes sense to have Edge want to hurt Balor rather than worry about the win or loss. That’s kind of the point of the team and they will likely get to stand tall after a beatdown. I’m expecting a big tag match next month, but that needs to be it for the feud so Edge and company can move on. To what….I’m not sure.

Post match Styles and Styles get beaten down.

Alpha Academy promises Kevin Owens DNA evidence next week that will prove that Ezekiel is Elias. Owens is happy because his brother Ken Owens is here to compete against Ezek…er, Elias.

It’s time for the VIP Lounge with MVP hyping up Omos’ win over Bobby Lashley last night. MVP starts to explain what happened to Lashley but here is Cedric Alexander to interrupt. Alexander keeps saying THEY DID IT and seems to think that he’s back in the team. That doesn’t seem likely, but here is Lashley to clean house, though MVP escapes. Cedric springboards into the Hurt Lock to really leave him laying.

Sonya Deville isn’t happy with Adam Pearce’s formal investigation but he promises her quality competition later tonight.

Sonya Deville vs. ???

Before the opponent is announced, here is Pearce to say that as a result of the formal investigation, Sonya is FIRED as an official, but she is still an active star, meaning she is having a match with this person.

Sonya Deville vs. Alexa Bliss

DDT and Twisted Bliss finish Deville at 34 seconds.

We look back at Cody Rhodes beating Seth Rollins last night.

Ezekiel vs. Ken Owens

It’s Kevin in a gray wig, because Ken is his older brother. Ken goes on a big rant about how he can’t stand liars like Elias and how stupid the people are here for buying this. The wig eventually comes off (with Ezekiel giving a funny shocked face) and the fight is on, but Alpha Academy runs in to beat Ezekiel down. No match.

We recap the return of Asuka to interrupt Becky Lynch.

Becky interrupts Asuka in the back and doesn’t get why Asuka is getting a title shot. Not so fast as Asuka has to beat Bianca Belair to get a title shot, which has Becky confused about the idea of beating a champion to get the chance to beat the champion (preach it). Becky talks about handing Asuka her last title but Asuka screams that she didn’t need Becky’s help. Asuka shouts about Becky acting like a baby instead of a mom, causing becky to say that Asuka is the one with the weird green tears on her face as she walks away.

Veer Mahaan vs. Frank Lowman

Lowman has a bit of size to him and says he doesn’t want to get taken out on a stretcher. He has a wife though and three triplets to go with her, so he is doing this for his family. Lowman gets in a shot to start but is taken down by a Thesz press (minus the press). A side slam sets up the Million Dollar Arm. The Cervical Clutch makes Lowman tap. Lowman was one of the better looking jobbers in a long time.

Cody Rhodes is proud of his win over one of the best in the world. Now he is seeing someone with limitless potential like Theory, but you have to dig deep to find that potential. Theory better be ready to dig deep.

US Title: Cody Rhodes vs. Theory

Cody is challenging and they lock up to start. Theory takes him down and strikes a quick pose so Cody hits a forearm to the face. That’s fine with Theory, who snaps the arm across the top rope and scores with a rolling dropkick. A dropkick to the knee cuts Cody off again but he’s right back with a springboard kick to the face. Something off the apron is broken up though and they go to the announcers’ table, which sends Theory running back inside.

We take a break and come back with Cody fighting out of a chinlock and they both hit crossbodies for a double knockdown. A powerslam gives Cody two and a moonsault is good for the same, meaning frustration sets in. Back up and Theory elbows him in the face, setting up the fisherman’s buster onto the knee. Cody isn’t having that and hits the Disaster Kick into the Cody Cutter but Seth Rollins comes in for the DQ at 13:08.

Rating: B-. They were starting to cook a bit near the end, but Rollins’ interference might as well have had a big countdown clock running for the entire match. You knew they were going to go to a third match between those two, probably in the Cell, and now they have a reason. At the same time, I like the idea of using a title match to set up one more fight. Cody gets screwed out of something he wants and Rollins keeps him from getting something he wants. Not a bad way to go.

Post match Seth Stomps Cody onto the announcers’ table and screams about Cody never taking anything else from him again.

Doudrop/Nikki Ash vs. Naomi/Sasha Banks

Non-title. Doudrop headbutts Naomi away to start and sits down on her to break up a sunset flip attempt. The cobra clutch goes on for a bit before a running corner splash crushes Naomi. A step up enziguri gets Naomi out of trouble though and it’s Banks coming in with a high crossbody, which is pulled out of the air for a slam. Nikki tags herself in (Doudrop doesn’t approve) and covers for two but Banks fights up and gets over to Naomi. The Codebreaker/Bubba Bomb combination finishes Nikki at 4:10.

Rating: C-. Anytime WWE wants to drop the Doudrop name and the Ash gimmick, I’m certainly cool with it. These are two talented women who could be doing something and are instead left as little more than losers, especially Nikki with that dead end idea. I could see both of them being released soon too and while that is sad, odds are they aren’t going to get to do anything of note anytime soon.

Post match Doudrop yells at Nikki but Miz, guest referee for the next match, comes out to cut them off.

Mustafa Ali vs. Ciampa

Miz is guest referee and neither of the two of them get an entrance. Ali grabs a rollup for no cover to start so Ciampa runs him over and stomps away. A running knee knocks Ali off the apron and a clothesline on the floor makes it worse. That lets Ciampa sit on the announcers’ table for his pat on the back but Ali rolls him up for….a very delayed one back inside. The chinlock goes on but Ali comes back with a hard clothesline. Ali hits a superkick and a tornado DDT for a VERY delayed two. Ciampa uses the distraction to hit a reverse DDT for the very fast pin at 5:33.

Rating: D+. It’s an idea that you have seen time after time and this happened to be the latest instance. I’m glad Ali is back and a feud with Miz isn’t the worst thing, but Ciampa being little more than a pawn who isn’t given as much as a decent introduction is a sad thing to see. You know, because this show is so flush with interesting talent that they can throw Ciampa out there with nothing behind him.

We get what sounds like a mashup of the Lacey Evans Story. Has she just been traded and we’re supposed to forget last week’s Smackdown?

We look at Bobby Lashley attacking Omos/MVP/Cedric Alexander earlier.

Lashley wants Omos in a cage next week.

Dana Brooke and Tamina have talked to R-Truth about getting divorces, but here are Reggie and Akira Tozawa with flowers and candy. Then R-Truth serves them with divorce papers. Well not so much Tozawa, as he runs away without taking them.

Asuka vs. Bianca Belair

Non-title CHAMPIONS CONTENDER match and Becky Lynch is on commentary. Feeling out process to start with Belair flipping over her and telling Asuka to bring it. Belair goes with a leapfrog and runs Asuka over. With Asuka down, Belair loads up the handspring moonsault but Becky pulls her to the floor for a whip into the steps and the DQ at 2:59.

Post match Becky beats Asuka down to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. This show started well and then fell hard, as most of the last hour, plus some more before that, was rather rough. Three disqualifications in nine matches is a lot, but the biggest problem continues to be the lack of a World Title. You have Edge and company as the monsters but with no one to chase, they are only so interesting. Nothing on here feels especially important and it comes off like they’re trying to find a way to get to the next pay per view without having a main story. That can work every now and then, but when it is the feature, there is a big problem.

Results
RKBro b. Street Profits – RKO to Ford
Rhea Ripley b. Liv Morgan – Prism Trap
Finn Balor b. Damian Priest via DQ when Edge interfered
Alexa Bliss b. Sonya Deville – Twisted Bliss
Veer Mahaan b. Frank Lowman – Cervical Clutch
Cody Rhodes b. Theory via DQ when Seth Rollins interfered
Naomi/Sasha Banks b. Doudrop/Nikki Ash – Codebreaker/Bubba Bomb combination to Ash
Ciampa b. Mustafa Ali – Reverse DDT with a fast count
Bianca Belair b. Asuka via DQ when Becky Lynch interfered

 

 

 

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Wrestlemania Backlash 2022: The Low Rent Canadian Stampede

Wrestlemania Backlash 2022
Date: May 8, 2022
Location: Dunkin Donuts Center, Providence, Rhode Island
Commentators: Michael Cole, Pat McAfee, Jimmy Smith, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

it’s time for a pay per view that feels like it has been little more than an obligation as the show is six matches long with a number of title matches. Granted in this case that number is one but take what you can get. The main event is a six man tag for reasons that I’m still not clear on but maybe the in-ring work can make up for it. Let’s get to it.

The opening sequence looks at Wrestlemania and how we got here.

We get a long recap video on Cody Rhodes vs. Seth Rollins. Rhodes returned at Wrestlemania as a surprise opponent and beat Rollins, who isn’t happy about it. Now they are having a rematch with Rollins knowing what he is getting and both guys wanting to prove that they are better.

Cody Rhodes vs. Seth Rollins

Cody starts fast by flipping out of a belly to back but the pop up uppercut is blocked. They take turns taking each other into the corner and Rollins rolls him up for two for a standoff. Cody is sent out to the apron for a knee out to the floor, where Rollins cuts him off with a clothesline. Back in and Cody fights out of a chinlock, setting up the Disaster Kick for two. Rollins knocks him out to the floor again and the crash puts Cody right back in trouble.

The chinlock goes on again but Cody fights up, only to get rolled up for two. Rollins heads up top, where Cody catches him with a delayed superplex for another big crash. They chop it out until the Cody Cutter gives Rhodes two but Rollins kicks him out of the air. They fight over a Pedigree attempt (that gets the fans’ attention) until Rollins grabs a Falcon Arrow for two. The Buckle Bomb into the frog splash gets two on Cody but he rolls away from the Phoenix splash.

A superkick (good one too) rocks Rollins, who is right there to catch him with the superplex but the Falcon Arrow is countered into Cross Rhodes, with Rollins’ foot landing in the rope on the cover. The moonsault misses and Rollins hits the Pedigree for two, leaving them both down. Rollins starts snapping off the Flip Flip And Fly, which Cody reverses into Cross Rhodes. Another is loaded up but Rollins snapmares out, only to have to flip out of a Vertebreaker. Rollins’ rollup with tights is reversed into a rollup with tights to give Cody the pin at 20:47.

Rating: B+. The Cody push continues as he gets another win over a former World Champion and proves that he belongs in the main event scene. These two have some very good chemistry together and I liked what we got here, even if the rest of the show might have some issues living up to this one. Heck of a match here, and Cody getting the title shot at Summerslam feels like a legitimate possibility.

Video on Bobby Lashley.

We recap Bobby Lashley vs. Omos. Lashley beat him at Wrestlemania, but now Omos has MVP in his corner as a guide to make him extra dangerous.

Bobby Lashley vs. Omos

MVP is here with Omos. Lashley slugs away to start and knocks Omos up against the ropes but an MVP distraction lets Omos get in a cheap shot. The slow beating continues as Lashley is knocked into the corner, allowing Omos the chance to make various noises. Lashley is knocked down again, allowing MVP to ask if Lashley is regretting his life choices yet.

A choke slows Omos down though and it’s Lashley tying him in the ropes and hammering away. With Omos tied up, Lashley goes after MVP but has to stop for the Downward Spiral on Omos. The Hurt Lock goes on but Lashley gets driven into the corner for the fast break. Lashley manages a spinebuster and loads up the spear, which is cut off with a knee. MVP gets in a cane shot and the chokebomb gives Omos the pin at 8:52.

Rating: C-. Unfortunately, this is about as good as it’s going to get between these two. You’re just not going to be able to get much out of Omos, who shouldn’t be doing much as far as moving around. This was the way it should have been and they made the match work about as well as expected. Omos had to win here and they even got the MVP interference in there too. Not a good match, but how it should have gone.

We recap Edge vs. AJ Styles. Edge beat him at Wrestlemania with help from Damian Priest, but Priest is barred from ringside. Styles also has a bad arm coming in.

AJ Styles vs. Edge

Styles starts fast and knocks him to the floor for some rams into a few things. A dropkick through the ropes doesn’t seem to connect but a camera cut saves them. AJ hits a moonsault to the floor but the Phenomenal Forearm is cut off with a big boot. Edge sends him into the post and steps a few times as the arm starts getting banged up again. Styles gets pulled down by the arm to set up an armbar to keep Edge in control.

Back up and AJ scores with a Pele but stereo crossbodies give us another double knockdown. A belly to back faceplant gives AJ two but Edge goes up, only to get hurricanranaed back down. The fireman’s carry backbreaker onto the knee gets two and the Calf Crusher goes on. Edge breaks that up with a ram into the mat, but AJ is smart enough to put it right back on. This time Edge goes to the rope for the actual break and loads up the spear, which hits a buckle that got exposed somewhere in there.

The second spear attempt connects but Styles is back up with the Styles Clash for two. The Phenomenal Forearm is loaded up so here is Damian Priest, who comes to the aisle but not to ringside, meaning he’s fine (even commentary calls that out as a lame technicality). Finn Balor comes in to take out Priest so Styles goes up….and we’ve got someone in a mask to pull him off the ropes. Edge grabs a crossface sleeper for the knockout win at 15:28.

Rating: B-. I don’t think there was any doubt that this was going to be pretty good, but it’s basically the exact same finish they had at Wrestlemania. Edge wins off some mysterious interference, likely setting up another match between these two in the Cell, as WWE manages to get a third match out of one idea. At least the mask reveal should be interesting, as they tend to be.

Post match the masked person gets in the ring, kneels to Edge, and unmasks as….Rhea Ripley. That’s not surprising and that isn’t a bad thing.

Video on Bianca Belair, who isn’t on the show but we need something to fill in the Peacock commercial time.

We recap Charlotte vs. Ronda Rousey for Charlotte’s Smackdown Women’s Title. Charlotte beat her via some shenanigans at Wrestlemania so now it’s an I Quit match. Rousey continues to look rather bored with everything she does, but that has been the case since she got back.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Ronda Rousey

Charlotte is defending in an I Quit match. Rousey knees her down to start and goes with the judo throws to stay on the arm. A clothesline gets Charlotte out of trouble but she has to escape Piper’s Pit. Charlotte hits a rather nasty German suplex (with the referee checking on Rousey) before they head outside. The trash talk lets Rousey get in a posting and she whips Charlotte into the timekeeper’s area. Charlotte is back out with a big boot and it’s kendo stick time, because OF COURSE WE HAVE A KENDO STICK.

Rousey takes it away so Charlotte runs off and comes back with two sticks. That’s fine with Rousey, who monkey flips her away and grabs both sticks in the process. The sticks are broken over Charlotte so she grabs a camera and throws it at Rousey’s head. With that missing because it would have wrecked Rousey, they fight into the crowd with Rousey being whipped into the hockey boards.

Charlotte ties her into a hand rail and puts on something like a camel clutch (how Sasha Banks beat Charlotte years ago). A chair shot is blocked through and they head back to ringside with Rousey taking over again. Another Piper’s Pit is broken up with a rake to the eyes and Rousey gets posted hard. Rousey manages to get in an armbar in the corner but they fall out to the floor to break it up.

After McAfee asks if that’s the Fiend in the front row (noticing some good cosplay), Charlotte comes back in with Natural Selection onto a chair for a No. The chair is set up with Charlotte saying this is her last chance and Happy Mother’s Day. The armbar in the chair goes on but Charlotte won’t quit. Rousey: “I was hoping you would say that b****.” The arm is cranked even harder and Charlotte quits at 16:23.

Rating: B. What mattered the most here was that this felt like a fight. It came off like two women who wanted to hurt each other and had a brawl (kendo sticks aside). The ending was about Rousey going into full gear to put Charlotte away because she was so angry. I’m not sure what is next for Rousey, but she absolutely had to win this one.

Money in the Bank is coming, complete with Cody Rhodes in the empty Allegiant Stadium, talking about the show. They’re making him one of the faces of the show.

We recap Madcap Moss vs. Happy Corbin. After losing to Drew McIntyre at Wrestlemania, Corbin blamed Moss, which split up the team. Then Corbin stole Moss’ Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal trophy and the match was set to prove themselves.

Madcap Moss vs. Happy Corbin

They start fast with Moss hammering away and yelling about jokes. A hiptoss drops Corbin again but he sends Moss out to the apron. Back in and Corbin hits a chokeslam before they head outside with Moss being rammed into the barricade. The chinlock goes on back inside before Corbin hits a flipping slam. A backsplash of all things (commentary is surprised at that one) gets two but Moss is back up for a nice looking fall away slam.

The Punchline is broken up and countered into a belly to back slam for two. Deep Six gets two more so Corbin does the slide underneath the ropes for the clothesline. Moss ducks and grabs a sunset flip for the pin at 9:42. I don’t remember the last time I saw someone win clean with such a basic move out of nowhere like that.

Rating: C-. This was the match that they put out there for the sake of filling in time between the big matches and it felt like it. Moss vs. Corbin isn’t an interesting feud and it wasn’t going to be well received as a pay per view match. What we got was a passable brawl but the fans weren’t having it. I did like the sudden finish though as that is something you do not see nearly often enough these days.

Video on Drew McIntyre.

Charlotte has a broken radius and is out of action for the time being.

We recap RKBro/Drew McIntyre vs. the Bloodline. The original match was RKBro vs. Usos to unify the Tag Team Titles but then McIntyre and Roman Reigns got involved to make it a six man tag, which is far more interesting. Allegedly.

RKBro/Drew McIntyre vs. Bloodline

Paul Heyman is here with the Bloodline and Orton starts with Jimmy. Riddle comes in for the assisted Floating Bro but Jimmy sends him into the corner to take over. McIntyre comes in and tosses Jimmy into the corner, allowing him to do the dramatic point at Reigns. After thinking about it for a bit, Reigns accepts the tag and then hands it off to Jey (sending McAfee into a fit of laughter).

It’s back to Riddle, who gets taken into the corner as the Usos start the beating. With Riddle down, NOW Reigns is willing to come in and the slow beating is on before it’s back to Jimmy. Orton gets superkicked off the apron so Riddle is a bit more alone. Riddle finally gets in a shot to the face though and the Usos are knocked down, allowing the double tag to McIntyre and Reigns, the latter of whom realizes he screwed up by having no one to tag.

McIntyre wins the slugout and hits a belly to belly, setting up the jumping neckbreaker. The Usos come in for a distraction though and it’s Reigns knocking McIntyre down. Reigns stops to pose with the titles and it’s McIntyre coming in with a Claymore. The hot tag brings in Orton to clean house with RKO’s, meaning Jey needs to save Jimmy. Jey superkicks McIntyre to cut off the Claymore and drags Jimmy over to the corner in a smart move. The double tag brings in Jey and Riddle, with the ladder striking away to put Jey in trouble.

The Floating Bro gets two on Jey, who is right back with a pop up neckbreaker for the same. Everything breaks down and McIntyre loads up the announcers’ table, only to get release Rock Bottomed through it by Reigns. Riddle takes out Jimmy and Reigns but Jey is there with a suicide dive. Back in and Jey and Riddle kick each other down, earning a nice bit of applause. Jey goes up top but gets pulled down with a super RKO, only to have Reigns spear Riddle for the pin at 22:25.

Rating: B+. That would have been a hot fire house show main event and it was a very entertaining match. Then you get to the problem: there is a grand total of nothing to get out of it once the bell rings. Reigns has no challenger set up, the Bloodline wins, there is no Tag Team Title match scheduled for either team, and nothing was set up going forward. That being said, I’ll take a very good main event like this any time, as you had all six of them working hard and the fans were all the way in.

Overall Rating: B+. This was actually a heck of a show, assuming you don’t want it to mean anything going forward (save for Rousey winning the title). It was a bunch of good matches, with the two weakest being watchable, and a hot main event. There was nothing horrible on the card and the fans were into a lot of things on here, so we’ll call this a low rent version of Canadian Stampede (no, it isn’t that good) in what shouldn’t be a surprise. As usual, when WWE gets away from the goofy, the in-ring product is strong and they had another solid three hour show here. Just don’t expect it to mean anything and you’ll be fine.

Results
Cody Rhodes b. Seth Rollins – Rollup with tights
Omos b. Bobby Lashley – Chokebomb
Edge b. AJ Styles – Crossface sleeper
Ronda Rousey b. Charlotte – Armbar
Madcap Moss b. Happy Corbin – Sunset flip
Bloodline b. RKBro/Drew McIntyre – Spear to Riddle

 

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – April 25, 2022: Maybe They’re Learning

Monday Night Raw
Date: April 25, 2022
Location: Thompson Boling Arena, Knoxville, Tennessee
Commentators: Jimmy Smith, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

We are less than two weeks away from Wrestlemania Backlash but we have a special milestone to cover first. This week is twenty years to the day of Randy Orton’s WWE debut and a special tribute is planned. I’m sure nothing will happen to cause that to be derailed in any way. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The ring is surrounded by wrestlers and Riddle introduces us to a rather cool tribute to Randy Orton’s career. There are clips from every major moment of his career (save for that first World Title win of course) and my goodness there have been a lot of them. With that out of the way, Riddle introduces Orton, who talks about how he was actually born right here in Knoxville.

Orton thanks a lot of the people who helped get him here, including a special mention of Mick Foley for turning him into the Legend Killer. There have been a lot of moments over the years, but he has never had more fun than he is having right now, which is good for a hug to Riddle. He thanks the fans for always coming back to him and says there would be no Legend Killer, Apex Predator or Viper without them.

Riddle has a surprise, as a second generation star who looks up to Orton as a mentor wanted to say something. Cue Cody Rhodes for a hug of his own but Seth Rollins says don’t trust Cody. He’s just out here to steal the spotlight like he did to Rollins at Wrestlemania. Rollins says Orton’s best days are behind him so he isn’t the future, meaning a new leader is needed around here.

That would be Rollins, but Ezekiel gets in the ring to interrupt. Ezekiel talks about watching dominate as the Legend Killer (with Rollins checking Ezekiel’s hair for some reason). Kevin Owens pops up to scream that Ezekiel is a liar and he is going to prove it. Now the Usos come out to say they have been watching Orton since they were fifteen. Now they are ready to unify the Tag Team Titles, but here is Adam Pearce to make a big tag match for tonight. The brawl is on, with Orton RKOing Owens to give the fans a nice moment. You could feel the emotion from Orton and it clearly meant a lot to him.

Kane is here and talking with Bianca Belair backstage.

Raw Women’s Title: Bianca Belair vs. Sonya Deville

Belair is defending and they go to the floor, where Belair throws her over the announcers’ table. Deville can’t get back in and that’s a countout at 46 seconds.

Hold on though as Sonya says not so fast because they are going to start the match again with no countouts. They fight on the floor with Belair being sent over the timekeeper’s area. She comes out with a chair shot for the DQ but Deville says restart it AGAIN, no countout and no DQ. Cue Carmella and Zelina Vega (now fine again I guess) and we take a break.

Back with Belair fighting off all three of them and sending Carmella and Vega into the corner. A victory roll sends Belair chest first into the middle buckle (which had a large chunk of hair hanging over the corner) and a DDT onto the chair gets two. Vega loads the chair into the corner but gets knocked out to the floor. Deville goes into the chair and it’s the KOD to retain the title at 8:41.

Rating: D+. What in the world was this? So Deville is the evil boss and apparently can make Carmella and Vega get out of their argument from a week or two ago? Then she just loses in about eight minutes total? This felt like a smoke and mirrors match and outside of an injury or something REALLY bigger coming, this was one of the weaker things on Raw in a pretty good while. Belair winning in her hometown was nice, but could they do it in a better way?

Post break, Zelina Vega and Carmella are arguing about whose fault that was. Deville comes in and slaps them both, saying she is still their boss.

We recap Edge and Damian Priest attacking AJ Styles last week.

Edge and Damian Priest talk about what they have been doing as of late and are ready to take out Finn Balor tonight. After some cheap shots at Knoxville, Edge talks about how AJ Styles isn’t here tonight because of that bad arm. That’s the same arm that AJ hurt in the 2020 Royal Rumble when Edge started his big comeback. Edge isn’t worried about the Phenomenal Forearm because AJ can’t hit it with one arm. As for tonight, Balor’s judgment has already been determined.

Veer Mahaan vs. Sam Smothers

Big boot, Million Dollar Arm, Cervical Clutch for the tap at 40 seconds.

Post match Mahaan sends him outside and puts the hold on again, including another one on the announcers’ table.

It’s time for arm wrestling between Omos and Bobby Lashley, with MVP talking some trash before Lashley comes out. MVP talks about how this started when Lashley went to Wrestlemania without him, which is why MVP has moved on to someone better than Lashley in every possible way.

Cue Lashley to cut him off and we’re ready to go. They don’t waste time here and go straight to it, with Omos taking over early. MVP talks a lot of trash to fire Lashley up though and Lashley eventually wins. Then MVP teases a cane shot so Omos can jump Lashley and beat him down. The arm wrestling table crushes Lashley over and over, much to MVP’s approval.

We look back at last week’s double commitment ceremony, which led to a bunch of 24/7 Title changes.

Earlier today, R-Truth announced that he is a marriage counselor and has set up a mixed tag between them tonight. Oh and he’ll be guest referee (complete with another certificate), which might have been more interesting if this hadn’t aired after he came to the ring in a referee shirt with an announcement of the match.

Akira Tozawa/Tamina vs. Dana Brooke/Reggie

R-Truth is guest referee. The women start with Tamina grabbing her by the hair….and seems to tease a kiss until Tozawa tags himself in. Reggie comes in as well and hits a corkscrew crossbody but Tozawa knocks him down. The top rope backsplash (with an I LOVE YOU to Tamina) finishes Reggie at 1:26.

Post match Tozawa throws Dana down and covers her but Truth breaks it up….and rolls Dana up for two (counting himself). Dana leaves while shouting that she trusted Truth.

Long video on Cody Rhodes vs. Seth Rollins, including last week when Kevin Owens walked out on Rollins during a match with Rhodes.

Here is a very sad looking Becky Lynch for her first appearance since Wrestlemania. It has been three years since she came out here without a title and now she doesn’t recognize herself anymore. She is at rock bottom….but that means it can be the start of an other Becky Lynch comeback. It means she can beat Bianca Belair and win the title back to be the champion again and no one can ever take it from her. Cue ASUKA for a surprise return and Lynch looks like she has seen a ghost. Asuka rants in Japanese before saying she’ll stop Becky. She flicks Becky in the nose so Lynch swings and misses, meaning it’s time to run.

We look back at the Street Profits using the Usos’ theme song to distract and beat RKBro last week.

The Street Profits recap various things taking place around here and want the next shot at whoever leaves Wrestlemania Backlash with the titles.

Finn Balor vs. Damian Priest

Edge is on his throne on the stage and Priest is “representing Judgment Day”. Priest shoulders him down to start but Balor gets in a clothesline to the floor. That’s fine with Priest, who hits a Razor’s Edge onto the apron as we take a break. Back with Balor fighting out of a cravate and hitting the shotgun dropkick into the corner. The Coup de Grace is loaded up but Balor stops to look at Edge for too long and gets knocked back down. A lifting Downward Spiral gives Priest the pin at 7:18.

Rating: C. I like that the new monsters are getting some wins, but it’s yet another instance of Balor going up and then coming right back down a short while later. Priest had to win here to keep the team strong and now they can move on to AJ Styles again. It was nice to see the logical path, but seeing Balor not lose over and over would be nice as well.

It’s time for MizTV, with Miz getting straight to the point by bringing out new United States Champion, Theory, as his guest. After an awkward discussion of first names, Miz says it is nice to see the United States Title having some credibility after twelve years of nothingness. Theory remembers that Miz was US Champion twelve years ago and talks about growing up watching Miz. He promises to become the US Champion but Miz has some advice for him: don’t trust anyone.

People want to win the title and take it from Theory….and Mustafa Ali of all people interrupts. Miz: “You still work here?” Theory: “Aren’t you the guy who took his ball and went home?” Miz: “You’re Mufasa, Mustafa’s younger brother!” Ali says if he wanted to laugh, all he has to do is watch Miz wrestle. He was talking to Adam Pearce and is hoping that Theory is holding an open challenge for that title so he can answer it tonight.

Theory shoots that down so Ali asks if Theory is all biceps and no balls. Ali says Theory is out here running like the Miz, which has Theory praising Miz. A match sounds good to Miz, but he doesn’t have a magic wand. Theory says he does though, because he just texted Vince McMahon and the match is set.

Mustafa Ali vs. Miz

Miz works on the arm to start but Ali flips up, only to get big booted in the face. Another kick to the head gives Miz two and it’s time for the chinlock. With that broken up, Miz chops away in the corner, only to have Ali duck underneath and chop away even more. A hard whip into the corner drops Ali again but he kicks Miz down.

Ali’s rolling neckbreaker gives him a breather but Miz kicks the leg out and hits the DDT for two of his own. Ali sends him to the apron and catches Miz on top with right hands. Miz knocks him down and tries the Figure Four, which is reversed into a rollup to give Ali the pin at 6:35.

Rating: C-. I wasn’t feeling this one, but some of that might be due to my mind being blown at the fact that Ali actually showed up on WWE TV again. I’m glad to see him back, but he was in a pretty lame match here as it felt rather slow and Ali didn’t get to do much. What mattered was that he won though and maybe he could get somewhere this time around.

Post match Tommaso Ciampa jumps Ali and I’m interested.

We look back at Rhea Ripley turning on Liv Morgan.

Ripley talks about how she came here and dominated on her own but then got turned into a tag wrestler. Now she is back on her own and doing everything for herself, but here is Morgan to jump her and start the brawl.

The Alpha Academy is trying to get Kevin Owens to pay up for last week but he wants the full lie detector results first. Seth Rollins comes in and thinks there are more important things to discuss so the Academy leaves. Owens doesn’t think much of Rollins but here are the Usos to say they need to be on the same page or Roman Reigns won’t be happy. Rollins laughs that off and they are all left alone.

We look back at the arm wrestling match.

MVP isn’t worried about Bobby Lashley, because Omos has challenged him to a match at Wrestlemania Backlash. Omos seems ready for some violence.

Cody Rhodes/Ezekiel/RKBro vs. Usos/Seth Rollins/Kevin Owens

Ezekiel jumps Owens to start and the good guys clear the ring before the bell. We’re joined in progress with Ezekiel hitting a delayed vertical suplex on Jimmy. Riddle comes in for a snapmare and hands it off to Orton for the assisted Floating Bro. It’s off to Rhodes, but Rollins offers a distraction so Jey can come in with the Samoan drop. Cody gets caught in the wrong corner, with the Usos getting in some shots each.

Rollins comes in but misses a charge in the corner, allowing the tag back to Ezekiel. A spinebuster plants Rollins for two but he sends Ezekiel into the corner for the tag to Riddle. Rollins catches him up top in a hurry though and a reverse superplex sends us to a break. Back with Riddle hitting Rollins with a Floating Bro but Jey breaks up the hot tag attempt. Riddle fights up and hits a jumping knee but the villains take his partners off the apron.

Owens’ Swanton gets two on Riddle and Jey adds an enziguri…which sends Riddle right into Orton for the tag. House is cleaned but everything breaks down, with Orton dropping the bad guys onto the announcers’ table. There’s the hanging DDT to Jey but Rollins jumps Orton from behind. The Disaster Kick sends Rollins into the RKO and Ezekiel knocks Owens into another RKO. Riddle knees Jimmy into a pop up RKO and Orton RKO’s Jey off the top for the pin at 15:11.

Rating: B. What mattered here was they didn’t do anything screwy. This match wasn’t so much about advancing much of anything in a major way but rather making Orton look like a star on a special night. They made that work here as Orton got to run through everyone at the end with one RKO than another. The match had some good action and was fun, with the ending being a highlight.

Orton and company celebrate for a good while to end the show and nothing bad happens to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. Women’s Title match aside, they got in a nice show this week with two big returns and Orton looking like a star. I liked most of what we got here, but what gave me hope more than everything else is that Belair and Orton didn’t get the hometown punishment. Maybe WWE is starting to get the idea of letting the fans have fun and for the most part, they did that this week.

Results
Bianca Belair b. Sonya Deville – KOD
Veer Mahaan b. Sam Smothers – Cervical Clutch
Akira Tozawa/Tamina b. Dana Brooke/Reggie – Top rope backsplash to Reggie
Damian Priest b. Finn Balor – Top rope Downward Spiral
Mustafa Ali b. Miz – Rollup
RKBro/Ezekiel/Cody Rhodes b. Usos/Kevin Owens/Seth Rollins – RKO to Jimmy

 

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – April 18, 2022: They Didn’t Mess Up

Monday Night Raw
Date: April 18, 2022
Location: KeyBank Center, Buffalo, New York
Commentators: Jimmy Smith, Byron Saxton, Jerry Lawler

We are most of the way to Wrestlemania Backlash and a lot of the card has been set. Last week’s Smackdown saw RKBro vs. the Usos officially announced for the pay per view and at the moment, that is the biggest match on the card. Maybe we can get some more things added this week so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening video looks at Cody Rhodes beating the Miz last week and then setting up his Wrestlemania Backlash rematch with Seth Rollins.

Here is Seth Rollins to get things going. Rollins gets straight to the point by calling out Cody Rhodes, who joins him in the ring. Rhodes thinks Buffalo is Rhodes Country and the fans seem to agree. Before Rollins can get anything in, the fans keep cutting him off. Rollins says he was going to talk about his respect for Rhodes and his family.

After all of those years of hard work to become the American Nightmare, Rollins made him a star in one night at Wrestlemania. Rhodes asks him to get to the point, so Rollins says he wasn’t properly prepared at Wrestlemania, hence his loss. Rollins will be ready at Wrestlemania Backlash and he is ready to win once and for all. Rhodes remembers Rollins being to the top of the mountain four times, but Rhodes was the winner at Wrestlemania.

It’s true that Rhodes has been gone for six years and he spent some time in management. One thing he learned is that sometimes you need a mediator, so how about the good people of Buffalo? A quick audience poll seems to favor Rhodes, but Rollins has an idea of his own: Rhodes vs. an opponent of Rollins’ choice tonight. Rhodes is in as it continues to still work for him.

Women’s Tag Team Titles: Sasha Banks/Naomi vs. Liv Morgan/Rhea Ripley

Banks and Naomi are defending with Banks getting knocked down to start. Ripley wheelbarrows Liv into a splash for two but Banks is back up with a kick to drop Liv. Everything breaks down fast and they all go to the floor, with Banks getting hit with Riptide onto the barricade, leaving her looking very….surprised (Maybe?) as we take a break. Back with an assisted powerbomb setting up Riptide on Naomi but Banks makes the save. The Codebreaker into the Bubba Bomb into a rollup gives Banks the pin at Ripley at 7:26.

Rating: C. The match was pretty short and to the point but Ripley and Morgan lose, again, because the team that was put together all of a month ago needs to have some emotional split. It isn’t like the champs are some legendary pairing either, as this division continues to exist for the sole purpose of giving women a token story.

Post match Morgan and Ripley argue, with Ripley turning on her to end their time together after….about six weeks? Maybe?

We look back at Sonya Deville attacking Bianca Belair to set herself up as Belair’s first challenger.

Rhea Ripley is asked about an explanation but we don’t deserve one.

Here is Sonya Deville for a chat. She talks about how she is a competitor who wants to face the best in WWE. That is why she wanted to face Bianca Belair, because Deville doesn’t want to beat some each champion. Cue Belair to say but Deville threatens her with problems if she touches a WWE official. Belair is ready for the match right now but Deville says we’ll do it next week in Belair’s hometown next week. Deville keeps needling her and gets caught in the KOD, which means Deville has to threaten her with losing the title right now. Belair drops her and leaves.

Veer Mahaan vs. Jeff Brooks

Brooks gets driven into the corner to start and then thrown back out of it. The Million Dollar arm sets up the Cervical Clutch to make Brooks tap at 1:01.

Post match Mahaan does it two more times, despite referees and agents coming in.

In the back, Sonya Deville is ranting to Adam Pearce about Bianca Belair’s conduct and wants a huge fine. Belair comes in and pays her fine: $1.

Here is Kevin Owens for the KO Show and Chad Gable is in the ring to administer a lie detector test. Owens isn’t happy with Elias pretending to be his younger brother Ezekiel needs to get out here right now for the test. Cue Ezekiel, who says he is Elias’ younger brother, sending Gable into a rant about how Gable Steveson is overrated. Owens says focus, because he is getting $150 Canadian for this.

They get to the questions, with Ezekiel being truthful about his identity. Each one sends Owens further and further over the edge but Ezekiel has finally had enough. He has his first match tonight but Owens is tired of all this lying. Threats are made and Ezekiel basically tells him to bring it. Owens leaves so Gable jumps Ezekiel from behind.

Ezekiel vs. Chad Gable

Ezekiel charges at him to start but Gable grabs a dragon screw legwhip out of the corner. It’s time to go after the knee with a spinning toehold of all things before Gable goes up. The moonsault hits a raised boot though and Ezekiel (Ezekiel: “SPEAK WITH ZEKE!”) grabs a one legged Liontamer. Cue Otis to jump Ezekiel for the DQ at 3:28.

Rating: D+. Ezekiel isn’t exactly a top level worker, but I don’t think giving him a pinfall in his first match is the worst idea. If you don’t want Gable getting pinned, don’t put him in the match in the first place. This just left both guys looking weak, as Gable came off like Owens’ lackey and Ezekiel gets a lame DQ win in his debut. Why do it this way when you don’t have to?

Video on RKBro vs. the Usos for Wrestlemania Backlash.

RKBro vs. Street Profits

Non-title. Dawkins powers Orton into the corner to start and Orton isn’t sure what to do here. He settles for taking Dawkins into the RKBro corner and handing it off to Riddle for a headlock. Ford comes in with the dropkick to Riddle and goes up, only to have Riddle run the corner and hit a super Spanish Fly. We take a break and come back with Riddle striking away at Ford so the hot tag can bring in Dawkins to clean house. Everything breaks down and the double hanging DDT plants the Profits. The RKO is loaded up but the Usos’ music plays for a distraction, allowing a Doomsday Blockbuster to finish Riddle at 7:38.

Rating: C. First off, big points for not running ANOTHER singles match between two tag wrestlers. Those things haven’t been interested in forever and WWE has run them into the ground over and over again for the better part of ever. The distraction ending wasn’t exactly good, but at least they set up the Usos vs. RKBro, though they might have set up a short term program with the Profits for the titles too.

Post match the Profits say RKBro needs to be worried about them.

We recap AJ Styles vs. Damian Priest from last week, with Priest kneeling and the match ending.

Damian Priest and Edge, the latter sitting on a throne, says the fans need to know who they are. Edge says these seeds were planted when he was in the Brood and the Ministry of Darkness. They haven’t lived up to their potential, like last year when Priest was playing second fiddle to Bad Bunny. Then he didn’t even have a match at this year’s Wrestlemania!

Edge had to beg someone to face him at Wrestlemania and that was too far. He returned in a great moment but in two years, the fans are treating him like a part timer. The only person to stand in their way is AJ Styles so Edge officially challenges AJ for Wrestlemania Backlash. It will be AJ’s judgment day.

Post break, Styles accepts Edge’s challenge…and the lights start flickering. Edge and Priest appear and the beatdown is on, with Edge slamming a locker door on Styles’ arm over and over.

United States Title: Theory vs. Finn Balor

Theory (egads) is challenging and takes over early on by taking Balor down. We hit a rather early chinlock with Balor having to fight up and jawbreak his way to freedom. Theory takes him down again and hits a hanging neckbreaker out to the floor as we take a break. Back with Theory hitting a swinging side slam but Balor fights back. A suplex doesn’t work but Balor is able to counter a rolling something into a sitout powerbomb for two.

Balor stomps away and hits a Sling Blade into the shotgun dropkick. The Coup de Grace is broken up though and a springboard Spanish Fly (cool) out of the corner gives Theory two. A Town Down is broken up and Balor clotheslines him to the floor, setting up the big running flip dive. Back in and the Coup de Grace misses again, which bangs up the already bad neck, allowing Theory to hit A Town Down for the pin and the title at 11:35. Lawler: “SELFIES FOR EVERYONE!”

Rating: C+. After everything they did with Balor in recent weeks, they didn’t have a choice here but to change the title. Theory has beaten him time after time and it makes sense to give him the title to make him into something. Above all else, Theory gets elevated, even if it means Balor’s up and down WWE career continues.

Post match the villains come out to celebrate with Theory. Cue Vince McMahon to raise his hand and congratulate him as well.

Seth Rollins has an idea on who Cody Rhodes’ opponent will be but won’t say who it is. Now excuse him as he has a phone call from the opponent.

It’s time for the double commitment ceremony (not wedding) between Dana Brooke/Reggie and Tamina/Akira Tozawa, as presided over by R-Truth. During the ceremony, the 24/7 Title is off limits, as per Truth’s orders. Here are the women, with Sasha Banks and Naomi helping carry the bridal train. After Brooke corrects Truth on her name (it isn’t Brookes), it is time for one of the couples to be unified and the other two to get hitched.

Brooke says her vows, though the fans are not exactly interested, giving this quite the WHAT treatment. Reggie gives a to the point speech, talking about how their love has made them stronger. Tamina: “Same.” Tozawa: “What he said.” Truth asks for objections…but Tamina objects and tries to switch grooms. Actually hold on again as Tamina wants to marry Dana…..who is cool with this. Truth: “Y’ALL GONNA GET ME FIRED! I DON’T EVEN KNOW IF THAT’S PG!”

They switch back to the original pairings and the fans still don’t like this. They exchange rings and Truth says they’re committed, so get the smooching on. Smooching ensues….and Reggie pins Brooke to win the 24/7 Title. Then Tamina wins the title. Then Tozawa wins the title. Then Brooke hits a high crossbody off the top and wins the title before jumping on Truth’s back and running off. This could have been far, far worse, even if it didn’t really accomplish anything.

We recap MVP turning on Bobby Lashley to join Omos and set up their Wrestlemania Backlash rematch.

Earlier today, MVP said he has moved on to bigger, meaner and stronger things with Omos. Before Wrestlemania Backlash, they want to let Omos display his strength. Say in an arm wrestling match next week.

Lashley talks about how he has to beat Omos to get to MVP. Is Omos stronger than him? We’ll find out next week because the arm wrestling is on.

Cody Rhodes vs. ???

Seth Rollins brings out Cody’s opponent and it’s….Kevin Owens. They start fast with Cody knocking him outside but the suicide dive is blocked with a right hand. Owens fall away slams him into the barricade and we take a break. Back with Cody hitting a dropkick but the snap powerslam doesn’t work. Owens hits a backsplash to the back for two and starts ripping at Rhodes’ face.

Cody fights back but the Cross Rhodes attempt is blocked and Owens hits a hard DDT for two. They fight outside with Cody knocking him over the announcers’ table, only to have Seth Rollins come back out. We take another break and come back with Owens breaking up a superplex attempt and nailing the frog splash for two.

A Swanton is good for the same and Owens hits the swinging superplex. They head to the apron with Cody reversing an apron powerbomb to send Owens outside. Rollins yells at Owens to get his fat a** back in….but Owens isn’t having this and takes the countout loss at 17:20.

Rating: B-. This felt like a main event and what matters is Rhodes continues his roll. I can get not wanting to have Owens take a pin here as he still has some momentum going, but Rhodes gets to beat his third World Champion in three matches. Good main event match here, and Rollins vs. Owens might be warming up for after the next pay per view.

Rollins shoves Rhodes off the top to end the show, with Rhodes holding his ankle. Notice what Lawler did at the end when he shouted “RHODES IS HURT!” That’s the old school “come back next week to see what happened” mentality that you almost never see in WWE these days. When is the last time a WWE show ended on a cliffhanger or something that made you wonder what happened after the show ended? Do more of that and make this feel more exciting.

Overall Rating: C+. There were some rocky points in here and some of it wasn’t the best, but it also didn’t have some terrible moment or some dagger to the whole show. It wasn’t some classic, but there was enough good action and movement forward, plus the wedding was funny in a bit of a car crash way. Not too bad of a week here and I’m good with that after some of the recent Raws.

Results
Naomi/Sasha Banks b. Rhea Ripley/Liv Morgan – Jackknife rollup to Ripley
Veer Mahaan b. Jeff Brooks – Cervical Clutch
Ezekiel b. Chad Gable via DQ when Otis interfered
Street Profits b. RKBro – Doomsday Blockbuster to Riddle
Theory b. Finn Balor – A Town Down
Cody Rhodes b. Kevin Owens via countout

 

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – April 4, 2022: They Need A New Coat

Monday Night Raw
Date: April 4, 2022
Location: American Airlines Center, Dallas, Texas
Commentators: Jimmy Smith, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

It is the night after Wrestlemania and I’m not even sure if that means anything these days. This show has a long history of being something special but since that isn’t WWE’s deal a lot of the time, we might be in for a show that is closer to normal. That isn’t exactly inspiring but let’s get to it.

Here are Wrestlemania Night One and Night Two if you need a recap.

Note that I was in the arena for this show, sitting in the upper deck and looking down at the edge of the stage, with the ring to my left and the Titantron to my right.

We open with a long recap of Wrestlemania, as you might have seen coming.

Here is Cody Rhodes, rising through the stage again and walking down a short ramp, to get things going. Cody takes his time getting to the ring and the fans seem happy to see him, though it doesn’t come across as well as it did in the arena. Cody: “So….what do you guys want to talk about?” Forty seven days ago, he became a free agent and has kept silent since then. Rhodes made the decision to return to WWE and it was never a hard choice. It’s a great story of the returning star and he is glad to be back.

He is an avid reader and he stumbled upon this quote: “Sometimes a man finds his destiny upon the path to avoid it.” Rhodes puts up a photo of his dad holding the WWWF Title in Madison Square Garden from September 26, 1977. That is the same title that Hulk Hogan (boo), Undertaker (yay), Shawn Michaels (yay) and HHH (also yay) among others have held over the years. Rhodes talks about how this photo was on the mantle in his parents’ bedroom until his father’s last day.

One day when he was a kid, he asked his dad about being a champion like Hulk Hogan. His dad got serious and explained the championship advantage, meaning that since he won by countout, he didn’t take the belt (yes belt) home with him. That made eight year old Cody decide he was going to win the title for his father.

That hasn’t happened yet and that Dream died right in front of him. Now though, he wants to claim his dream again and his intentions are clear. Rhodes is going to do it for his friends, his fans, and for the American Dream. Cue Seth Rollins to interrupt and they shake hands, with Rollins being very happy and mouthing what commentary says is “welcome home”.

This was a big moment for Cody, but the important point here is that it made sense. Cody didn’t go onto any weird tangent and got his point across (with some impressive sounding words). I can go with the idea, though a Rollins rematch might be on tap first. Good stuff here, and the fans were into Cody. I’m not sure if that lasts beyond Wrestlemania weekend, but it’s a good start.

Rhea Ripley/Liv Morgan vs. Naomi/Sasha Banks

Champions Contenders match. Naomi and Ripley start things off with Rhea hitting a rather delayed vertical suplex. That doesn’t get her very far though as Naomi sends her into the corner, setting up a pair of middle rope splashes for two. Banks sends Morgan outside and hits the running knees off the apron, only to have Ripley take Banks down with a flip dive. Naomi dives onto Ripley though and a slingshot legdrop gets two as we take a break.

Of note: during the break, D-Generation X’s music started playing by mistake, confusing all of the wrestlers (the D-Generation X cam was played during a later break, so it wasn’t completely random). Back with Naomi and Ripley making double tags, allowing Banks to hit a top rope Meteora on Morgan. Banks misses a clothesline as Morgan does a Matrix into a rollup for two before kicking Banks in the head. Ripley tosses Banks into Liv’s powerbomb for two but Naomi is back in for the elevated Codebreaker to finish Morgan at 8:57.

Rating: C+. They started picking up the pace near the end and had me believing that the champs were going to lose in their first match after winning the belts. That being said, they don’t exactly have much in the way of challengers going forward and that is a continuing problem for the titles. I can’t imagine it getting much better, but at least Naomi finally had something to do.

Post match Ripley walks out on Liv, with Kevin Owens coming to the ring as she leaves.

Post break, Owens doesn’t seem happy. Maybe he made a mistake on Saturday by challenging Steve Austin to an actual match. He goes over THE PLAN to trick Austin into a match but might have underestimated Austin. Owens admits that Austin is still great, because it takes someone great to beat him. However, it should be noted that he came in with a really serious back injury. Owens: “WATCH THE FOOTAGE! YOU CAN TELL!” He was limping because he was lifting a lot of weird but the WWE Universe needed him out there. Austin’s win should be stricken from the record….and here is someone named Ezekiel.

It isn’t Ezekiel Jackson, but rather someone who looks a lot like Elias, minus his beard. Owens asks Elias what he thinks he’s doing. Ezekiel: “I am not Elias.” Fans: “YES YOU ARE!” Ezekiel says he is Elias’ younger brother and Owens looks like he’s about to lose it. Owens thinks he has beer in his ears because he can’t believe he’s hearing this. Owens hates liars, so Ezekiel thinks Owens hates himself. Ezekiel reminds him of getting stunned, sending Owens into a rant against Enrique or whatever his name is. He has ten seconds to get out of Owens’ ring, but Owens counts down and then leaves instead.

We look back at Miz turning on Logan Paul after the two defeated the Mysterios at Wrestlemania.

Dominik Mysterio vs. Miz

Rey Mysterio is here with Dominik, who gets hit with the Skull Crushing Finale for the pin at 26 seconds. Ok then.

Post match here is Veer Mahaan to lay out the Mysterios, including a cross between the Gargano Escape and a camel clutch to Dominik as Rey crawled over to try and save him.

Here is Bianca Belair for her first chat after winning the Raw Women’s Title. Belair thanks everyone for standing behind her because she never thought she would win the title. She takes off her sunglasses to reveal a black eye before talking about how losing to Becky Lynch at Summerslam made her realize how great she can be. Now she knows just how fast you can lose it all.

After a quick pause, Belair talks about how she never cheated but worked to get this title. Lynch went for her throat, her hair and even her eye. After all that though, she is still standing here because these people deserve better. That’s why she became better and will become the best she can be. She’ll fight everyone back there because no one is ready to take this title from her. Lynch needs to take some time and find out who she is, because Belair is the EST of WWE and is ready for anyone. This was the victory lap speech and Belair deserved it.

Video on Bron Breakker.

NXT Title: Bron Breakker vs. Dolph Ziggler

Ziggler, with Robert Roode in his corner, is defending. Breakker drives him into the corner to start and snaps off an overhead belly to belly. Ziggler manages to Breakker outside though and rakes away at the eyes back inside. That doesn’t work for Breakker, who plants him with a powerslam, only to get crotched on top. We take a break and come back with Breakker fighting out of a chinlock but Ziggler nails a chinlock for two. Breakker’s sitout powerbomb gets two more and the comeback is on, including the overhead belly to belly.

Roode’s distraction breaks up the spear so Breakker takes him out with the big flip dive. Ziggler hits a running knee (might have been a mistimed Fameasser), followed by the Fameasser for two. Breakker blocks a ram into an exposed buckle pad but walks into the superkick (how Ziggler retained at Stand & Deliver) for two. Another superkick is loaded p but Breakker spears him down and hits the gorilla press powerslam for the pin and the title at 10:05.

Rating: C+. This is what you were probably expecting at Stand & Deliver so they did get the ending right. Breakker gets two in the title back in front of a big crowd and a much larger audience while showing that he learned something after his previous loss. I’m not sure if he should have lost on Saturday, but at least they got things right in the end.

Here is MVP for a chat. MVP praises Bobby Lashley for beating Omos on his own and brings out Lashley for his celebration. Lashley brags about beating the biggest and strongest opponent he has ever faced. He knew he had to wait for Omos to make a mistake and that is exactly what happened. Cue Omos to shout that he wants a rematch….and MVP turns on Lashley to help Omos beat him down. There’s a twist and it makes sense, as Lashley is a face anyway and doesn’t need someone to talk for him.

Rhea Ripley and Liv Morgan make up in the back, as Ripley has gotten them a Tag Team Title shot next week. Thank you for rendering a stipulation completely worthless in about an hour and a half.

Carmella/Queen Zelina vs. Natalya/Shayna Baszler

Byron Saxton has a blast reminding Corey Graves that Carmella and Zelina lost their Tag Team Titles at Wrestlemania. Actually hold on, as Zelina says Carmella is obsessed with a man who is a fool for wanting to marry her. Zelina: “However, he is a VERY handsome man!” That’s too far for Carmella, who mocks her for only winning the Queen’s Crown tournament. Zelina was going to be in the wedding as the maid of honor, but now she can be a flower girl. The fight is on, with Carmella running over to Graves as Zelina leaves. Carmella kisses him in relief. No match, as Natalya and Baszler never appeared.

We recap Pat McAfee beating Austin Theory at Wrestlemania, only to love to Vince McMahon. Then Steve Austin came out to do Steve Austin things.

Austin Theory isn’t happy with the loss and tells the Usos he’s ready to take his anger out on RKBro and Finn Balor.

RKBro/Finn Balor vs. Austin Theory/Usos

Balor shoulders Jimmy down to start and stomps away. Riddle comes in to kick at the arm and grab a front facelock. That’s broken up so Theory comes in, only to be backdropped to the floor. Riddle kicks him in the face but the springboard Floating Bro is blocked as we take a break.

Back with Riddle fighting his way out of a chinlock but getting caught with a pop up neckbreaker for two. Riddle manages a jumping knee to the face and the hot tag brings in Orton to clean house. The hanging DDT is loaded up on Jey but Theory makes a blind tag and hits a rolling dropkick. Balor tags himself in as well but misses the Coup de Grace. We hit the parade of finishers, with Riddle being superkicked out of the air. Balor hits Jimmy with the Sling Blade, only to walk into the ATL for the pin at 8:14.

Rating: B-. Pretty easily the best match on the show so far as the star power involved helped a lot. That being said, I believe this is the third time that Theory has pinned Balor in as many weeks and I can’t say I’m surprised in the slightest. The US Title has long since stopped meaning anything and this is another good reason as to why. Just let Theory win the title already because WWE actually seems interested in doing something with him.

Here is Edge for a big chat. Edge says he is an honest man. He knew he would beat AJ Styles but he didn’t know Damian Priest would come out to help him. Edge knew that these people would be sheep just like he said they would. Fans: “WE ARE SHEEP!” Edge: “Very telling idiots.” The fans need to rise for the man who respects Edge’s message and the punishment for the guilty: Damian Priest.

After a handshake, Edge asks what got through to Priest over the last few weeks. The fans say they don’t care, but Priest says that doesn’t bother him anymore. Priest says he spent a long time trying to please everyone else, but that made it so easy to pledge his loyalty to Edge. They came to their new reality at the same time, which leads Edge to AJ Styles. He wanted the pitbull AJ Styles and that’s what he got. The thing with pitbulls is that they pick fight over flight, but AJ needs to think of his family.

Cue Styles for the brawl, including taking out Priest and sending Edge into the post. Styles grabs some chairs but Priest gets up, allowing Edge to take Styles down. The Conchairto is loaded up but referees and agents make the save. I can go with the feud continuing, especially if Priest and Edge bring in some friends to uneven the odds even further.

Street Profits vs. Alpha Academy

The Academy jump them from behind to start and the fight is on. Cue Adam Pearce to say let’s make this a Texas Tornado match, which works for the Profits (and lets Corey Graves say “You want to get nuts? Let’s get nuts.” from Batman for some reason). Ford hits the big flip dive onto the Academy on the floor but it’s Otis coming back in to power away.

Dawkins fires off rights and lefts in the corner, leaving Gable to fisherman’s suplex Ford for two. They pair off and we take a break with the fights continuing. Back with Otis loading up the table but he and Dawkins fall to the floor. Ford goes up top but gets crotched by Gable. A superplex is loaded up but Ford shoves him off and hits the frog splash through the table for the pin at 8:24.

Rating: C. The Texas Tornado stuff felt tagged on but maybe they realized that the crowd needed to be woken up a bit. This was late in the show and the fans weren’t exactly feeling it at this point but at least they got something energized here. If nothing else, watching Ford do his big jumps and dives is fun and that’s what the show needed.

Here is the Bloodline for the big show closing as they take their time getting to the ring. Roman Reigns says he knows why the people are here but wants Paul Heyman to explain the Bloodline’s success. Heyman lists off the team’s accomplishments, with a focus on Reigns’ box office successes of course. Reigns calls himself the last needle mover because he is always operating at the highest level. He isn’t hanging his hat on this weekend because he is constantly moving forward. This Friday on Smackdown, you’ll find out the next step. Until then, acknowledge him. End of show.

That’s an interesting way to go, as they didn’t really say anything. Maybe they have something planned for Smackdown, but this was ten minutes to say “Reigns won, he’s great, see you Friday.” I’m not sure if that means anything, but it’s quite the wait for nothing substantial.

Overall Rating: C. I’m not sure what to think on this one. On one hand, it was an improvement over previous years as SOMETHING happened on the Raw after Wrestlemania. On the other hand, it wasn’t exactly interesting stuff. Elias’ younger brother? Veer Mahaan? Breakker wins a title that isn’t on this show? MVP is now with Omos?

It’s ok, but it isn’t something that is going to have my attention for very long. Maybe something gets better next week, but this wasn’t exactly making me want to see where things are going. Cody felt strong and that’s about it. Not a terrible show, but they need something hot and this wasn’t it in the slightest.

After the show was over, Cody Rhodes beat Kevin Owens with the Cross Rhodes in a dark match. Rhodes thanked the fans and talked about how surreal it was to be back to end the night.

Results
Naomi/Sasha Banks b. Liv Morgan/Rhea Ripley – Elevated Codebreaker to Morgan
Miz b. Dominik Mysterio – Skull Crushing Finale
Bron Breakker b. Dolph Ziggler – Gorilla press powerslam
Usos/Austin Theory b. RKBro/Finn Balor – ATL to Balor
Street Profits b. Alpha Academy – Frog splash to Gable through a table

 

 

 

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Smackdown – April 1, 2022: And That’s Why I Wasn’t There

Smackdown
Date: April 1, 2022
Location: American Airlines Center, Dallas, Texas
Commentators: Michael Cole, Pat McAfee

It’s the go home show for Wrestlemania and that could mean a few things. On one hand, it means we could be in for the last big push before the biggest show of the year, which means an exciting night. On the other hand, it could be WWE putting in as little effort as possible as they have more important things on their minds. Knowing WWE, I’ll go with the latter almost every time. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Commentary welcomes us to the show and gives us a video package on Andre the Giant to hype up his namesake battle royal.

Andre The Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Tommaso Ciampa, Cedric Alexander, Ivar, Erik, Madcap Moss, Drew Gulak, Shelton Benjamin, Mansoor, Shanky, Jinder Mahal, R-Truth, Akira Tozawa, Reggie, Apollo Crews, Commander Azeez, T-Bar, Damian Priest, Dolph Ziggler, Robert Roode, Finn Balor

This field is lame even by this match’s standards. Only Ziggler, Roode and Balor get entrances. It’s a brawl to start with Tozawa being eliminated, followed by Reggie, who makes the dumb choice of flipping around on the apron. There goes R-Truth, followed by Mahal, the latter of whom goes out at the hands of the Vikings. Benjamin knees T-Bar out and it’s time to start brawling near the ropes. Moss knocks Gulak out as I continue not remembering that Gulak works here.

Cue Happy Corbin to praise Moss but almost low bridges him out by mistake when Balor reverses a whip into the ropes. Ciampa sends Moss to the floor but this time Corbin makes the save. Corbin leaves so it’s time to settle down again. Crews knocks out Alexander and Azeez gets rid of Benjamin. Mansoor’s slingshot neckbreaker is blocked and Ciampa knees him out. The Vikings eliminate Crews but get tossed by Shanky and Azeez, leaving them with the giant showdown.

They fight near the ropes and both get tossed out, leaving us with Priest, Balor, Roode, Moss, Ciampa and Ziggler. Balor and Priest remember that they had a feud for a bit and slug it out until Balor tosses him out. Roode puts Ciampa on the apron and Ziggler hits the superkick for the elimination to get us down to four. That leaves Balor to clean house but he can’t get rid of Roode. Ziggler goes to help Roode but Moss tosses Ziggler and Roode. Balor charges at Moss and gets sent out to give Moss the win at 7:11.

Rating: C-. This was every lame battle royal you’ve seen and that is what the Andre battle royal seems to be. It’s everyone without stuff going on at Wrestlemania being added in to a match on TV, which doesn’t make it feel special. Instead, this feels like a match that WWE has to do and picks a random person to win. Moss is part of a bad angle with Corbin vs. Drew McIntyre, but it isn’t like the match has any history or importance for the most part.

Post match Moss celebrates his win but asks what you should call a battle royal with the smartest Texans. A CATTLE royal!

Intercontinental Title: Ricochet vs. Humberto vs. Angel

Ricochet is defending because this is what the title has become these days. Angel and Humberto share an entrance and their chyron says Los Lotharios, which is a bit of a weird way to set up a triple threat. Ricochet gets knocked into the corner to start, with Angel biting his finger. The obvious double teaming begins and Ricochet gets caught with a running knee to the face. Ricochet fights up and manages a double hurricanrana, because that’s something people can do. Angel catches him on top with a super armdrag though and we take a break.

Back with Ricochet having to fight off the numbers game again, which allows the double teaming to take him down. Humberto nails a spinwheel kick for two, which doesn’t sit well with Angel. The Wing Clipper is loaded up but Humberto rolls Angel up for another near fall as greed enters the equation.

Ricochet uses the distraction to crossbody them down, setting up a rolling dropkick to Angel. The standing shooting star press gets two on Humberto with Angel making the save. Humberto gets backdropped to the floor and an enziguri drops Angel. Ricochet drops Humberto onto Angel, setting up the 630. That’s not enough so Ricochet goes straight to Humberto with the Recoil for the pin to retain at 11:15.

Rating: C+. The action was ok, but the fact that it was a relief to see Ricochet beat a tag team to retain the Intercontinental Title tells you everything you need to know. Ricochet at least comes off as a winner to save the slightest bit of face, but he needs a lot more to make up some of the last few weeks. Now he can move on to a singles challenger, but him sitting on the sidelines might be best for both himself and the title at the moment, as WWE doesn’t seem to know any better.

Long video on Kevin Owens vs. Steve Austin. Owens wanted a way to Wrestlemania so he challenged Austin to come on the KO Show. One day Owens remembered that he hated Texas and started insulting it so he wants the embodiment of Texas to show up. Austin responded from what looked to be some road out in the wilderness, which sends us into the Austin highlight reel set to Bawitaba by Kid Rock because 90s.

Naomi/Sasha Banks vs. Queen Zelina/Carmella

Non-title with Liv Morgan/Rhea Ripley and Natalya/Shayna Baszler at ringside. Carmella kicks Banks to the floor to start, allowing her to get in some dancing. Zelina hits some running knees in the corner and Carmella is back in for a chinlock. That’s broken up and Banks gets in a shot to the face, allowing her to get over to Naomi for the tag. With Carmella dispatched, a Vader Bomb hits Zelina and Naomi adds the split legged moonsault for the pin at 3:26.

Rating: C-. This was about as filler of a match as you can get as they were thrown out there to set up a match that isn’t going to have much interest no matter what they do. The Women’s Tag Team Titles continue to be absolutely nothing and I can’t even get annoyed at the champs losing two days before their Wrestlemania title defense. Nothing match with nothing teams getting ready for a nothing match. Why is this a surprise these days?

Ronda Rousey was training earlier today (appeared to be with Shayna Baszler) and insisted that she was controlling her anger. She’ll be seeing her baby before the show, where she’ll rip off Charlotte’s arm.

Video on Charlotte vs. Ronda Rousey, looking at their respective in-ring/cage careers. Both dominated their sports and now it is a clash of the two titans, which would have been a bit better had they not already had a Wrestlemania match. It is also presented as a battle of holds, with the armbar/ankle lock vs. the Figure Eight. In other words, this sounds better in theory than it has been in reality.

Here is Charlotte for a chat. She praises the video and says it was more dramatic than Coda. She is going to destroy Rousey and, after mocking the WHAT chants by suggesting they are saying WOO, Charlotte declares herself cool. Every woman wants to be like her and every man just wants her. Having people want her autograph and pictures is cool, just like leaving Wrestlemania as the Smackdown Women’s Champion.

Video on Roman reigns vs. Brock Lesnar. I believe they’re fighting soon or something.

Rick Boogs plays Shinsuke Nakamura to the ring so Pat McAfee gets on the announcers’ table….but Austin Theory trips him up. McAfee gives chase to the back, where Theory runs into Vince McMahon’s office. That slows McAfee down but he kicks the door open, with Vince coming out and threatening to fire him. McAfee seems worried and goes back to commentary.

Rick Boogs vs. Jimmy Uso

Shinsuke Nakamura and Jey Uso are here too and McAfee is back on commentary. Boogs curls Uso to start before throwing him down. Jimmy is right back up with a whip to send Boogs into the post to cut him down but Boogs manages to gorilla press Jimmy….from his knees. Boogs stands up and drops him into a fall away slam, because that’s something a person can do. Cue Theory to grab a cup of ice from a fan and throw it at McAfee, who manages to keep his cool. Cue Finn Balor to go after Theory so all six get in the ring for the double DQ at 3:08.

Rating: D+. That gorilla press alone was worth seeing but that’s all they had in such a short match. Normally I would have an issue with WWE doing so many things in one match, but this is a bit of a weird situation. Balor vs. Theory is a feud that has been going on in recent weeks, though Balor isn’t even on Wrestlemania. I’m not sure why they are building feuds for beyond Wrestlemania, but we seem to be ready for a six man tag here to keep it going even further.

Usos/Austin Theory vs. Finn Balor/Shinsuke Nakamura/Rick Boogs

Joined in progress with Nakamura getting two on Jey. The running knee to the ribs in the corner gets one but a quick shot allows Jey to get over to Theory. Nakamura knees Theory in the ribs as McAfee is VERY pleased with the fans not liking Theory. Boogs comes in and grabs the rotating back and forth gutwrench suplex for two.

It’s off to Balor, who gets sent outside for a cheap shot from Jey to put him down. The villains glare down at McAfee and we take a break. Back with Jimmy missing a splash in the corner but Jey knocks Boogs off the apron to cut off a tag attempt. Balor hits the basement dropkick to rock Jimmy though and it’s a double diving tag to Nakamura and Theory. Nakamura gets to clean house, including a kick to Theory’s head and the sliding German suplex.

Everything breaks down and Boogs is sent hard into the steps. Balor comes in to clothesline Theory to the floor, setting up the big running flip dive. The Sling Blade connects back inside and it’s the shotgun dropkick to knock him down again. A distraction lets Theory break up the Coup de Grace though and the ATL finishes Balor at 11:29.

Rating: C. I knew this was coming and I still cringed at the pinfall. For the life of me I don’t get why WWE feels the need to do this, but if Theory isn’t US Champion by the end of the next pay per view (at the VERY latest), this is another entry on the long list of stupid things WWE has done. The US Champion shouldn’t be losing most of the time, but this is what, three or so falls he has taken to set up a match he isn’t even in? It’s another case of WWE feeling like they are trying to make things worse for someone they seem interested in pushing. Only WWE, thank goodness.

Post match McAfee gets on the apron to stare Theory down but he manages to keep his composure.

Here are Happy Corbin and Madcap Moss for Happy Talk, complete with a table to hold Angela the sword. Moss brags about winning the Andre the Giant battle royal earlier, but Corbin says he was supposed to do that. Corbin is euphoric and thinks that could be his new name. We look at how he got the sword and Corbin brags about everything he has done at Wrestlemania over the years.

The sword is more of an insurance policy and he could decapitate someone with the thing. How depressing is it to name the sword after McIntyre’s dead mother? Corbin: “What does Drew McIntyre’s sword and his mother have in common? He lost them both.” Cue McIntyre, who knocks Moss out with one shot on the way to the ring. McIntyre grabs a chair and throws it at Corbin’s head (that was smart), causing the sword to fall down. The set is cleared out and McIntyre cuts the table in half.

Wrestlemania rundown.

Back in the ring, McIntyre stable the mat a few times to make fire and pyro go off to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. Oh they didn’t care. It was clear that this was designed to be a way to have a show before Wrestlemania and nothing more. None of the matches were good and a lot of this was about hyping things up. This has been the case for a pretty long time now and that reputation is why I was at other shows on Friday night and the only part I saw that night was at a restaurant between other events. It wasn’t that the show was bad, but rather that it was unimportant and WWE didn’t care. That’s as bad of a feeling that you can have and it was on in full display this week.

Results
Madcap Moss won the Andre The Giant Memorial Battle Royal last eliminating Finn Balor
Ricochet b. Angel and Humberto – Recoil to Humberto
Naomi/Sasha Banks b. Carmella/Queen Zelina – Split legged moonsault to Zelina
Rick Boogs vs. Jimmy Uso went to a double DQ when Jey Uso and Shinsuke Nakamura interfered
Austin Theory/Usos b. Shinsuke Nakamura/Rick Boogs/Finn Balor – ATL to Balor

 

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Wrestlemania Count-Up – XXXV (2019 Redo): All The Happy Endings

Wrestlemania XXXV
Date: April 7, 2019
Location: MetLife Stadium, East Rutherford, New Jersey
Attendance: 82,265
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Renee Young, Byron Saxton, Tom Phillips
America the Beautiful: Yolanda Adams

We’re back to this show after a year away and I’m not sure what to think about this one. I wasn’t in the stadium for this one and for once that is making me remember the show a little bit better. This whole thing is centered around a few matches, as Wrestlemania always tends to be. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Cruiserweight Title: Buddy Murphy vs. Tony Nese

Murphy is defending and this is during Nese’s (who won a tournament to get here) not so great face run. First good thing: there are a bunch of people in their seats already so the place doesn’t look ridiculous. Murphy misses a running knee at the bell so Nese hammers away in the corner and tells the fans that this is his Wrestlemania moment. A cartwheel off the apron lets Nese hit him in the jaw but Murphy grabs a fireman’s carry drop onto the corner (Colt Cabana’s Chicago Skyline) as we take a break.

Back with Murphy holding a chinlock but getting suplexed into the corner to cut things off. Some running elbows to the face rock Murphy and the Lionsault, with Murphy hanging in the ropes, gets two. Nese catches him on the ropes with a palm strike, only to get pulled into a Cheeky Nandos kick. A powerbomb into a spinning faceplant gives Murphy two as we get the “still filing in line” from commentary. Murphy’s Law is countered and Nese hits a reverse hurricanrana to put them both down again.

Murphy wins a strike off but Nese is right back with a sunset driver for his own near fall as the fans are finally getting into this. The running Nese doesn’t get to launch so Nese hits the Fosbury Flop instead. Back in and the 450 gets two in a surprising near fall. The jumping knee connects out of nowhere and Murphy’s Law gets two as Nese gets a foot on the rope. Ever the villain, Murphy tries his own running Nese, which is cut off by a superkick. The real running Nese finishes Murphy at 10:44.

Rating: C. The 205 Live guys had several matches that would blow this one away but at least they had a nice moment in the end with the fans getting into things. Nese as a face didn’t exactly click but beating Murphy felt like a bit deal. It’s a nice mini feel good moment to start what is going to be a long night.

Kickoff Show: Wrestlemania Women’s Battle Royal

Zelina Vega, Kairi Sane, Ember Moon, Liv Morgan, Sarah Logan, Ruby Riott, Mandy Rose, Carmella, Maria Kanellis, Asuka, Sonya Deville, Candice LeRae, Naomi, Nikki Cross, Lana, Dana Brooke, Mickie James

Only Naomi and Asuka get entrances. Nikki goes nuts to start and it’s a big brawl, as a battle royal should be. Maria is out in a hurry and Asuka knocks out Candice and Nikki back to back. Ember and Naomi trade hurricanranas until the former hits a quick springboard Eclipse on Lana. Another Eclipse gets rid of Naomi and there’s the real version to Mandy. Ember goes up again but Lana (the one in the designated Captain Marvel attire) shoves her out.

Sane hits an Alabama Slam on Lana and goes up like a schnook, only to get shoved to the apron by Logan. Even the bigger schnook, Logan doesn’t eliminate her but rather joins the rest of the Riott Squad to go after Lana. The elimination doesn’t take long but Sane drops Logan. The Insane Elbow connects, only t have the Squad get together and eliminate Sane without much trouble. An assisted flipping Stunner rocks Vega but AGAIN Logan doesn’t get the elimination.

Instead the Squad goes after Asuka and again they don’t eliminate her. Brooke gets to fight off all three of them and manages a slow motion Thesz press on Morgan. Riott goes after Brooke and gets tossed, with Morgan following her out. Brooke’s handspring elbow hits Vega’s knees though and the running knees in the corner make it worse. Rose and Deville get rid of Vega and Brooke, meaning we can get a big hug.

We’re down to Rose, Deville, Asuka, James, Logan and Carmella, the latter of whom seems to be on the floor because that’s something you have to have in battle royals these days. James hurricanranas Rose to the apron and superkicks her out, only to get dropped by Deville. Asuka beats up Logan and Deville at once but she manages to toss Deville. Logan gets rid of Asuka but, say it with me, Carmella is still in and superkicks Logan out for the win at 10:33.

Rating: D. Holy sweet goodness I can’t stand that finish and yet we seem to get it in every few battle royals (including last year’s women’s battle royal). I know Carmella getting the win is for the sake of the New York fans but egads this feels like a waste of a match, which tends to be the case with so many of these pre-show battle royals. In other words: more of the same stuff that wasn’t good in the first place.

Kickoff Show: Raw Tag Team Titles: Revival vs. Curt Hawkins/Zack Ryder

Revival is defending and picked the match because they thought it would be an easy win. See, Hawkins hasn’t won a match in two and a half years so of course he gets a Wrestlemania title shot (you have to keep the New York crowd happy you see). Dawson shoves Hawkins down to start and then pats him on the cheek in the corner. We get a recap of the Edgeheads as Dawson headlocks Hawkins down.

Ryder comes in as we hear about how the show in “the shadow of New York”, which is acknowledged as New Jersey, likely for one of the only times tonight. A middle rope missile dropkick puts Wilder down but Dawson low bridges him out to the floor. Something close to a top rope Demolition Decapitator gets two and the armbar goes on. Dawson comes back in and rips at the face before working on his own armbar.

That’s enough of that so Wilder grabs another armbar (he’s up 2-1 on Dawson) to keep Ryder down. Ryder fights up again but neckbreakers his way out of a double suplex. With Hawkins being distracted, the champs cheat to set up a hard clothesline for two more. The assisted legdrop gives Wilder two and we hit the chinlock as this keeps going. Ryder finally suplexes his way to freedom and there’s the hot tag to Hawkins.

House is cleaned until it’s a double clothesline to put Hawkins and Dawson down at the same time. The middle rope Rough Ryder hits Dawson but Ryder and Wilder crash out to the floor. Wilder saves Dawson at two and tornado DDTs Ryder on the floor. A brainbuster drops Hawkins outside as well and they’re all down for a bit. Back in and Hawkins is dead but manages a small package for the pin and the titles at 13:20. Hawkins slowly realizing that not only is the match over but that they won is kind of awesome.

Rating: D+. This went on too long but the ending was fine after setting everything up for so long with the losing streak. Hawkins and Ryder are a likable team so it’s not like them winning the titles is a bad idea. Besides, WWE has already taken away anything that the Revival could offer (and yet it would still get worse) so the loss doesn’t do a ton of damage to them anyway.

Kickoff Show: Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Otis, Karl Anderson, Andrade, Gran Metalik, Chad Gable, Heath Slater, Bo Dallas, Colin Jost Jeff Hardy, No Way Jose, Lince Dorado, Bobby Roode, Konnor, Tyler Breeze, Viktor, Luke Harper, Ali, Apollo Crews, Michael Che, Titus O’Neil, Tucker, Braun Strowman, Shelton Benjamin, Jinder Mahal, Matt Hardy, Curtis Axel, Rhyno, Luke Gallows, EC3, Kalisto

So the big deal here is Jost and Che are from Saturday Night Live and Strowman doesn’t like them. The two of them bail to the floor and hide under the ring as Axel is out in about ten seconds. Dorado takes a SCARY bump to the floor with Breeze, EC3 and Benjamin following him out. There goes Dallas as well but it’s time for a staredown with Strowman and Harper.

That’s broken up in a hurry and Titus gets rid of Slater. As expected, Titus is out a few seconds later off a missed charge and Ali gets rid of Jose. Ascension sends Strowman shoulder first into the post for a crash to the floor (through the ropes so no elimination). Anderson isn’t so lucky as he gets tossed and the Hardys do the same to Rhyno. Roode and Metalik are out next as the ring is starting to empty a bit.

Andrade tosses Kalisto onto Metalik but Gable rolls Andrade with German suplexes. Since it’s Gable though, Andrade throws him out in a hurry, leaving Otis to hit a double Caterpillar on the Ascension. They’re both out as well but Strowman is back in to get rid of Gallows, Tucker and Otis in a row. There goes Mahal as Harper tries to suplex Ali over the top. With Ali hanging upside down, Strowman kicks Harper out, nearly dropping Ali on his head in a very near miss.

We’re down to Strowman, Andrade, Matt, Jeff and Crews in the ring with Che and Jost still underneath the ring. Andrade and Crews go to the apron and Andrade tries a hurricanrana for no intelligent reason in a double elimination. Strowman puts the Hardys on the apron in the battle of North Carolina as Che and Jost get back inside. They can’t get rid of Strowman, who dumps the Hardys and is ready for the destruction.

Jost grabs a mic though and says this doesn’t need to end in violence. He presents his personal therapist, whose breathing exercises earn him a chokeslam. Che tries to eliminate himself but Strowman punches himself out instead. Strowman misses a charge and almost gets eliminated but powers through it and tosses Jost for the win at 10:27.

Rating: D+. Yeah it’s stupid and the SNL guys added nothing to the whole thing but Strowman won in the end and there were some nice spots (granted they went with some scary ones) throughout. It isn’t anything better or worse than your usual “get them all in there” battle royal and it could have been worse. That’s high praise for something like this anymore.

And with that Smackdown length Kickoff Show out of the way, we can get on with the real show. Isn’t modern WWE great?

Yolanda Adams sings America the Beautiful and we get the big helicopter flyover.

The opening video, complete with a WWE Presents, features the wrestlers talking about how Shakespeare said all the world’s a stage. Tonight, this is their stage and they are the players. We get the classic moments of course because this show is built around history. They do a good job of starting this slowly and then building it up into a big feeling. As usual, WWE’s promo videos are nothing short of incredible and somehow they manage to get better a lot of the time. That being said, wrestlers calling themselves storytellers doesn’t sound right.

Maybe it’s how many times I’ve heard the song on highlight packages since then, but that Love Runs Out theme song is really catchy.

Here’s Alexa Bliss, the host for the evening, to open things up. Bliss talks about how this show needs a goddess and if she snaps her fingers, she can make a Wrestlemania moment. A snap of her fingers produces Hulk Hogan, who is happy to be back here in the Silverdome. That gets a chuckle so then he calls it the MetLife Center in a joke that doesn’t go over as well. Hogan and Bliss pose together in a cute moment.

Hold on though as Paul Heyman storms out and says we’re doing the Universal Title match RIGHT NOW. The faster Lesnar wins, the faster he can go to Las Vegas where he is ULTIMATELY appreciated.

Raw World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Seth Rollins

Rollins is defending after winning the Royal Rumble and gets a big BEAST SLAYER intro. At least BURN IT DOWN gets a big reaction so they’re doing something right. Lesnar jumps him before the bell and knees Rollins off the apron. An F5 plants Rollins on the floor and a hard whip into the barricade makes it even worse. Rollins gets tossed over the announcers’ table as the beating is on in a big way. That’s not enough for Lesnar so he throws Rollins over another table before throwing Rollins inside.

Heyman and Lesnar talk the angry trash but it’s back to the floor before the opening bell. Cole: “Seth Rollins never had a chance!” And there’s your usual WWE line that gives away the ending. Brock throws Rollins over the announcers’ table for a third time and then through the cover of the announcers’ table. They go back in for the opening bell and there’s the first German suplex. Lesnar: “SUPLEX CITY B******!” Give him his t-shirt money.

The second suplex sends him flying again as Cole brings up the Wrestlemania XXXI cash-in. The F5 is countered though and Rollins gets in a low blow. That means a low superkick and three straight Stomps make Rollins champion at 2:30. It was an exciting start and the whole thing from Lesnar’s first attack ran about 7:00. They had to get the title onto Rollins here (though more importantly off of Lesnar) and this was certainly a memorable way to do it. Certainly more so than when they did it again in a longer form four and a half months later.

AJ Styles vs. Randy Orton

This is your “here are two big names without much else to do” match. Orton eliminated him from the Elimination Chamber and they got in an argument about who built Smackdown. Orton’s big CGI snakes really don’t look great but those things are hit and miss for everyone. AJ headlocks him to start and is promptly driven into the corner. A very early threat of an RKO sends AJ bailing to the corner and it’s another standoff.

Orton pokes him in the eye and hits a dropkick to take over, including a boot across the eye to make it even worse. AJ gets in his own dropkick though as they’re pretty even in the early minutes. With Orton taking a breather on the floor, AJ scores with the slingshot forearm, only to get knocked off the apron and hard into the barricade. Back in and the chinlock goes on as the fans start chanting something I can’t understand.

That’s broken up so AJ hits the sliding forearm, setting up the fireman’s carry backbreaker for two. An early Styles Clash attempt is countered into a powerslam to give Orton his own near fall as the slow pace continues. The Calf Crusher attempt is countered without much trouble but the second attempt is slapped on in the middle of the ring. Not that the fans are exactly interested but AJ did get it on. That’s broken up in a hurry so AJ heads to the apron for the Phenomenal Forearm.

Orton jumps up to RKO him out of the air (as he had done last week) but AJ holds back, leaving Orton to crash. The springboard 450 gets two but Orton is right back with the backbreaker. Orton’s rather good looking top rope superplex has AJ crashing down for two and an uppercut gets a crazy loud pop (that had to be for something else). The hanging DDT gets no reaction but Orton walking around does, as I’m almost scared to imagine what had the fans’ attention.

AJ hits an enziguri to block the RKO, only to walk into it on the second attempt. That’s only good for two as well and Orton is shocked. With nothing else working, Orton loads up a super RKO, which is escaped without a lot of effort. A Pele sends Orton to the floor and the Phenomenal Forearm knock him even sillier. Back in and Orton still can’t hit the RKO, meaning it’s another Phenomenal Forearm to give AJ the pin at 16:12.

Rating: C-. Things got a bit better by the end but it never got going at any intense level. These two are capable of a lot but it was rather slow paced for the most part and when the match is going that long, it can get pretty tiresome in a hurry. It’s not bad in any sense but it wasn’t exciting and you know these two could do a lot better. That makes it more frustrating than anything else, as I kept waiting for them to get going and they never really did.

Here’s Lacey Evans to continue doing her thing of walking around, smiling, and then walking back.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Rusev/Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Bar vs. Ricochet/Aleister Black

The Usos are defending and it’s one fall to a finish. There is something so awesome about seeing the look on Ricochet’s face as he walks onto the stage. You can see what it means to him and there is no faking that kind of a feeling. This also marks Ricochet and Black’s third shot at different titles this week, after Raw and NXT title shots earlier in the week. Jimmy and Black start things off with a feeling out process until Sheamus tags himself in to face Black.

The armbar doesn’t last long as Rusev tags Sheamus and runs Black over. Nakamura comes in for a kick to the back but the rapid fire tags continue, with Jimmy coming in to Samoa drop Black. Nakamura kicks Jimmy into a tag to Ricochet, who does a very spinny headscissors on Cesaro. Since it’s just a headscissors though, Cesaro uppercuts Ricochet down and starts swinging him, as Sheamus forearms everyone else.

After a nearly 40 second swing (geez), the Sharpshooter goes on in the middle of the ring. Black makes the save and strikes away, setting up a springboard moonsault for two on Rusev. Nakamura is back in with some running knees to Black, meaning Ricochet has to make a save of his own. That earns him a swinging Rock Bottom from Rusev and it’s time for the nine man Tower of Doom. Just to show off, Ricochet flips out and lands safely in the corner, setting up the 630 for two on Sheamus. We hit the parade of kicks to the face with the Usos superkicking Sheamus down. The Double Us retains the titles at 10:05.

Rating: B. This was almost all action from bell to bell and that’s all you can do with a match like this one. Let them do whatever they want and get in spot after spot for a little while. They didn’t overstay their welcome either, as this match got in the right amount of time. Good stuff here and one of the more entertaining things all night so far.

Hall of Fame recap. Thankfully Bret being attacked isn’t mentioned whatsoever.

Here’s the class being presented in the stadium:

Honky Tonk Man (How was he not in yet?)

Harlem Heat (Perfectly fine.)

Torrie Wilson (The new low benchmark.)

Brutus Beefcake (Again, how was he not in yet?)

Hart Foundation (Should have been earlier so Neidhart could be there but long overdue as well.)

Sue Aitchison (Warrior Award.)

D-Generation X (I’m sure they had to twist their arms to get here. Deserved of course.)

We recap Miz vs. Shane McMahon. Somehow Shane won the World Cup despite not being in the tournament and Miz, the man he replaced in the finals, was jealous. Miz’s dad thought they should team together so they won the Tag Team Titles. The reign didn’t last long though and they split up, with Shane turning on Miz. Tonight, it’s Falls Count Anywhere. This was in the middle of Shane’s RIDICULOUS run near the top of Smackdown where he was all over the show and beating main eventers, including that Tag Team Title win. Of course he gets a big Wrestlemania match, because that’s what makes sense for such a star.

Shane McMahon vs. The Miz

Falls Count Anywhere, but hang on as Shane needs to hear his introduction three times in a row. With that out of the way, Shane bails to the floor at the bell so the chase is on, with Shane hitting his horrible punches. In a smart move, Shane grabs Miz’s dad (in the front row) and again, the chase goes badly for Miz as Shane hammers away. They head outside again with Shane loading up the announcers’ table.

A monitor shot to the head puts Miz on the table but Miz’s dad blocks the big elbow. Shane gets down so Miz’s dad gets inside for the showdown, with Miz’s dad doing the pose that launched a subplot on the upcoming season of Miz and Mrs. Shane takes him into the corner and stomps away, drawing Miz back in for the beating. They fight to to the floor with Shane falling over the barricade but hold on as Miz wants someone to check on his dad.

With the medics doing their job, Miz dives over the barricade to take Shane down again. They fight over towards one of the big pillars that holds up the canopy over the ring but Shane fights out of the Skull Crushing Finale. Instead Shane grabs a DDT for two but Miz kicks him down off the stage. Shane is sent knee first into a barricade and Miz beats on him with a chair to blow off some more steam.

They wreck announcers’ row with Miz throwing him over every chair he can find, plus throwing some chairs around. Shane gets sent through a table for two, followed by a monitor shot to knock him over a barricade and onto the top of a well placed golf cart. That gives Miz a delayed two so he punches Shane up towards a production tower. A Skull Crushing Finale onto the platform gets two, because he’s Shane and Miz is just a former World Champion.

Shane fights back (of course) and climbs up to the top of the tower. Miz pursues so Shane begs off, even dropping to one knee. That earns him some left hands to the head and Miz superplexes him all the way down (after asking if Shane is ready) onto a crash pad. Worry not though as Shane lands on top for the pin at 15:25.

Rating: D-. I knew the ending was coming here and I still shake my head at the ending. Shane is the boss’ son but my goodness how hard can you push him? The worst part is that it is only going to get worse as the summer goes on, but this was a punch to the gut as Shane wins AGAIN, meaning he isn’t going away anytime soon. The superplex was a nice idea but showing the landing on the pad (which just happened to be there) took away all of the impact that it had. That is, whatever was left before Shane won of course.

Paige joins commentary.

Women’s Tag Team Titles: IIconics vs. Beth Phoenix/Natalya vs. Nia Jax/Tamina vs. Sasha Banks/Bayley

Banks and Bayley are defending and it’s one fall to a finish. Bret Hart is here with Beth and Natalya (who really feel like fill ins for Trish Stratus/Lita), though he doesn’t go beyond the stage. Tamina shoves Bayley down to start and superkicks Natalya for a bonus. Everything breaks down in a hurry with Nia being sent outside for a ram into the steps. Back in and Peyton rolls Sasha up for two and it’s a double kick to put drop Sasha again.

The Hardys’ Spin Cycle gets two on Banks but she’s right back with a backslide for the same. It’s back to Bayley for a sliding clothesline for two on Beth but Billie tags herself in. The IIconics take over on Beth, who is right back with a suplex to both of them at once. Natalya comes in for two but Bayley makes a fast save. The champs get in a fight with Beth and Natalya and it’s a Bank Statement to Phoenix. That’s broken up but the Glam Slam is countered into a rollup into the corner.

Natalya drops Sasha onto Bayley and they get the always fairly dumb looking double Sharpshooter treatment. This time it’s Tamina making the save and Nia comes back in to wreck everyone else. The IIconics get crushed with stereo Samoan drops but Beth shoves Nia off the top to break up a splash. Sasha takes Beth down as well and Bayley drops the top rope elbow, followed by Banks’ frog splash. The Tower of Doom is broken up so Beth hits a super Glam Slam on Bayley, with Kay making a blind tag. With Beth sent outside, Kay steals the pin and the titles at 10:47.

Rating: D. This went on too long and wasn’t all that interesting in the first place. The titles were brand new at this point and they already seemed pretty worthless, which would be proven over the next year. The fallout here is more interesting than the match itself, as you Nia would go away for about a year with double ACL surgery and Sasha (allegedly) threw a fit over losing and took the summer off.

The pilots from the Kickoff Show flyover are in the crowd. That’s always cool.

We recap Kofi Kingston vs. Daniel Bryan for the Smackdown World Title. Kofi replaced the injured Ali in the Elimination Chamber and got down to the final two. That set up one of the most dramatic things that WWE has ever done, as Kofi got inches away from winning the title and the fans ate it up. It was clear that Kofi had to get the title at Wrestlemania or he never would, which sent Kofi and New Day into a crusade to finally get the title shot that had eluded him for eleven years.

After jumping through all kinds of hoops set by Vince McMahon, it took New Day winning a gauntlet match to get the shot, with their longtime rivals the Usos stepping aside in a great show of respect for Kofi. At the same time, Bryan said that Kofi was a B+ player in an awesome role reversal from his legendary run five years earlier.

The match was finally set and it was a heck of a story, as Kofi had put in so many years of building credibility to get here and was finally cashing in. This wasn’t JBL jumping up to the main event scene, as Kofi had pretty much won every title other than the World Title. That’s not a big jump, but it was hard to believe that they would actually pull the trigger here. In other words, this was EXCELLENT and would have headlined any other year.

Smackdown World Title: Kofi Kingston vs. Daniel Bryan

Kofi is challenging and has New Day in his corner, while Bryan has Rowan. Big E. has a gift for Kofi and promises it for after the match. I had forgotten how nice of a touch Bryan’s eco-friendly belt really was. They stare each other down to start and the fans are behind Kofi, which is almost hard to fathom until you realize that Bryan might be a better heel than face. Kofi’s headlock doesn’t get anywhere so they fight over a backslide. Bryan monkey flips him so Kofi lands on his feet, setting up a dropkick to the floor.

The big dive takes Bryan down again and the roster is behind Kofi in the back. Things slow down a bit as Bryan needs a breather with Rowan. Back in and Bryan uppercuts him a few times to set up the surfboard, which always looks awesome. That’s broken up in a hurry as usual, allowing Kofi to kick away in the corner. Bryan’s moonsault into the running clothesline is countered into something resembling the standing double stomp (almost a Thesz press as Kofi can’t hit it properly) for two.

Kofi’s jumping clothesline works a bit better and the Boom Drop connects. Bryan heads outside again so Kofi tries a springboard dive, which lands ribs first on the announcers’ table. You don’t have to ask Bryan twice to go after the ribs like that so he drops Kofi ribs first across the top rope. The ribs get sent into the corner and it’s off to a waistlock, which works a lot better this time around. Kofi fights up and elbows in the corner but a very quick Trouble in Paradise is countered into a Boston crab.

Bryan’s belly to back superplex is broken up with elbows to the face and Kofi hits a top rope splash to the back for two. They slug it out but Trouble in Paradise is countered again, only to countered into a small package to give Kofi two more. Kofi’s crossbody is rolled through though and Bryan pulls him into a failed LeBell Lock attempt so they’re both down for a second. The running knee is countered into the SOS but Bryan reverses into the LeBell Lock, with Bryan letting go for some more elbows to the ribs.

Kofi finally gets his foot on the rope and you can hear the sigh of relief. Bryan YES Kicks at the ribs even more but Kofi fires up and tells Bryan to kick him even harder. As Bryan backs away, Kofi throws his own kicks and busts out a reverse suplex for two. They head outside again so Rowan can go after New Day, earning himself Trouble in Paradise. The Midnight Hour on the floor takes care of Rowan and Kofi blocks Bryan’s suicide dive.

Back in and Bryan hits the running knee…..for two and a big pop on the kickout. Bryan has had it and unloads with stomps to the head to set up the LeBell Lock. Kofi breaks out again and blasts Bryan with forearms to the face with more aggression than you usually see from him. Bryan won’t let go of the wrist so Kofi stomps him right back, knocking Bryan silly. Trouble in Paradise gives Kofi the clean pin and the title at 23:45.

Rating: A. That is the definition of the Wrestlemania moment and it holds up to perfection a year later. The fans completely bought into the idea of Kofi fighting through everything and winning the title in the end and that’s all it should have been. Kofi is the kind of guy who has been around forever and built up so much good will that when he finally went after the title, everyone was on his side. That made for a special moment and it was amazing throughout as it’s something that I never thought I would see, but here it is. That’s a great thing to see as rare as it can be.

On top of that, this was an awesome match with both guys giving it everything they had. The story here was perfect with Kofi not being the wrestler Bryan was but knowing that this was his one shot and giving everything he had to achieve his dream when he could. The fans believed in him and there was no way he could lose in this spot. Outstanding stuff and if not for the historic main event, this would have headlined in a landslide. Watch this again and smile a lot.

Post match Woods and Big E. pull out the classic WWE Championship and hand it to Kofi for the first time (Kofi kneeling in the ring and waiting to have it presented to him is a great visual). The pyro goes off and Kofi’s sons get in the ring to celebrate with him and one of them holds up the title, which is almost bigger than he is. We’re not done yet though as Big E. brings in the present from earlier. It’s the first New Day shirt featuring Kofi as champion and his kids get to hold them up for a perfect visual. Woods: “THEY SAID WE COULDN’T MAKE IT! WE MADE IT TO THE TOP!” Outstanding.

Che and Jost are banged up so Bliss introduces them to Dr. Scott Hall and Dr. Kevin Nash. Ok then.

Booker T. is the next guest commentator.

US Title: Samoa Joe vs. Rey Mysterio

Mysterio is challenging and this year’s comic gear is…..well Mysterio appropriately enough. Now how did he never do that one before? Joe kicks him in the face but Rey is right back with the springboard hurricanrana. The 619 connects but Joe pulls him out of the air into the Koquina Clutch and Rey is out at 1:00, which may have something to do with Rey injuring his ankle on Monday. Booker being annoyed at wasting all the time on prep work is good for a chuckle.

Sneak peak of Batista’s new movie Stuber.

We recap Roman Reigns vs. Drew McIntyre. Reigns returned from leukemia after a four month absence and he needs a first victim. Drew has run through the rest of the Shield as a bonus. This is your likely layup result of the show and that’s fine.

Roman Reigns vs. Drew McIntyre

Drew gets played to the ring by the New York Bagpipe Band. They trade shots to the face to start so Reigns snaps off a Samoan drop for an early two. McIntyre is right back with a spinebuster into a jackknife cover for two of his own. The Glasgow Kiss knocks Reigns down again and McIntyre throws him into the corner for two. The chinlock/armbar goes on until Reigns powers out and knocks him to the floor. Reigns’ running kick to the face is blocked though and McIntyre suplexes him down.

Back in and the reverse Alabama slam gives McIntyre two so he takes Reigns up top. That earns him a crotching, only to have Drew pull himself up from the Tree of Woe to send Reigns flying with a belly to belly superplex. Reasons of general heelishness cause McIntyre to slap him in the face, meaning the comeback is on. McIntyre gets knocked outside again for the Samoan drop on the floor, followed by the Superman Punch back inside. The spear finishes McIntyre at 10:06.

Rating: D. The fans didn’t care and why should they have? As usual, it was clear that Reigns was going to win and that happens far too often at Wrestlemania. It’s amazing that Reigns got to come back here but it’s Reigns, who almost always wins, winning again in a match where the ending was obvious throughout. Nothing to see here, and the fans were silent throughout.

Post match Reigns gets to pose in a rather emotional moment.

Here’s Elias for his self described greatest performance ever. He’s on screen playing drums, with a second Elias joining him on piano and the real thing in the ring playing guitar. They jam for a bit and guitar Elias says the other two deserve a standing ovation. Elias teases more members of the band and gets in his catchphrase before loading up the song….but here’s a SPECIAL BULLETIN on Babe Ruth calling his shot in the 1932 World Series.

Cue John Cena in Dr. of Thuganomics gear and the fans seem rather pleased. Cena raps about how he’s about to turn heel and how bad his own movies are. WWE doesn’t stand for Walk With Elias because it really means Wasted Wrestling Experiment. We get a nuts joke, followed by the FU to leave Elias laying. They have history together so this was as good as you were going to get. This was funny for a change if nothing else and that’s a cool Wrestlemania feeling.

We recap Batista vs. HHH. Back at Smackdown 1000, Batista had mentioned that HHH never beat him but laughed it off. Then in February, Ric Flair was having a 70th birthday celebration but Batista attacked him, while asking HHH if he had his attention. This set up the match, with Batista demanding that HHH give him what he wanted (over and over and over). HHH has put up his career just in case the ending was in the slightest bit of doubt.

Shawn Michaels is guest commentator.

Batista vs. HHH

No holds barred with HHH’s career on the line. Batista goes out to glare at Shawn but here’s HHH, riding in a Mad Max style cart because of course he is. Batista drives him straight into the corner to start so HHH is back with some right hands to the face. A backdrop sends Batista outside but he throws HHH over the announcers’ table in a crash. HHH is right back up with a ram into the barricade and busts out a chain to whip Batista over the back.

The chain is pulled into Batista’s mouth (Shawn: “That’s not going to help his movie career.”) and HHH whips him into the steps. To ramp up the pain, HHH busts out some pliers to bend Batista’s fingers around a bit. HHH isn’t done with the toolbox so he grabs some needle nose pliers and ribs Batista’s nose ring out. To be fair, that thing looked horrible. Cole: “HHH just ripped a nose ring out of the nose of Batista.” So the nose ring in his ear is still intact.

Batista’s nose is good enough to drop HHH onto the announcers’ table and then he does it again onto a different one. A chair to the back sets up the shoulders in the corner for two as things have slowed way down. Batista slams him down for two more and let’s go outside again. The steps are set on the table and another table is cleared off as this is taking quite a long time for one big spot.

The huge Batista Bomb through the table is countered with a backdrop onto (not through) the other table and they’re both down again. HHH gets up, spinebusters him through the table, and we get another breather. HHH pulls out the sledgehammer but it’s a spear to cut him down for two. This time it’s HHH knocking the sledgehammer away from Batista, earning himself a spinebuster in the process. The Batista Bomb, which makes HHH drop the sledgehammer again, connects for two.

With nothing else working, Batista brings in the steps but goes up top for some reason. That reason would be so HHH can powerbomb him onto the steps, setting up a Pedigree for two (Because this MUST KEEP GOING!). They’re both down again so here’s Flair to slip HHH the sledgehammer. HHH gets up and uses the steps as a launchpad to hammer Batista in the head. Since that’s not enough to pin him (or KILL HIM as it probably should have), Batista pops up to take the Pedigree for the pin at 25:45.

Rating: D. Why does HHH do this? They could have had the same match with at least ten minutes chopped off but for some reason we needed to get HHH’s latest big epic match, no matter how much people aren’t interested in seeing it. This was terrible with Batista looking like a shell of his glory days (fair enough) and the match going WAY longer than it should have. Horrible match, and did you expect anything else given this style of match’s history?

The B Team model Daniel Bryan WWE Champion shirts but here’s Ron Simmons for the joke.

JBL is your next guest commentator.

Baron Corbin vs. Kurt Angle

This is Angle’s retirement match as he can barely get in the ring without injuring himself these days and needs to limp away for good. Corbin is here because we all did something horrible in a past life. Angle goes after him to start but gets knocked into the corner to put him in early trouble. Corbin takes it to the corner and pounds away before mocking Angle’s family a bit. A missed middle rope ax handle sends Corbin throat first into the rope so Angle snaps off some suplexes for two.

Angle walks into a big boot but is fine enough to grab a quickly broken ankle lock. Deep Six gives Corbin two more but he misses a charge, allowing the Angle Slam to connect for two. The straps come down and the ankle lock goes on until Corbin rolls him into the corner for the break. Corbin throws in a You Can’t See Me so Angle punches him into more rolling German suplexes. The moonsault misses though and the End of Days finishes Kurt’s career at 5:59.

Rating: D. Angle does seem fine with putting Corbin over on the way out but this was another step in the seemingly eternal nonsense that was/is the Corbin push. It’s a lot to take and while I can live with Angle going out on his back, it’s a lot to take because Corbin really is going way above his pay grade every time he’s in a match like this.

Post match Angle thanks the fans and asks for one more YOU SUCK chant for the road.

Intercontinental Title: Bobby Lashley vs. Finn Balor

Lashley, with Lio Rush, is defending and they’ve traded the title, so tonight it’s the Demon to make the match feel big. Balor gets a special entrance by coming down off a raised platform, though it’s not as creepy as his NXT entrances. Lashley has very bright green contacts in for some reason. Some early dropkicks put Lashley on the floor and Balor takes him out with a dive for a bonus.

A hard drive into the apron cuts Balor off though and there’s a suplex to make it worse. Lashley clotheslines him hard to the floor but a Sling Blade gets Balor out of trouble. Rush’s distraction lets Lashley hit a HARD spear through the ropes though and a regular one gets two back inside. Balor fights out of a powerbomb and hits one of his own, setting up the Coup de Grace for the pin and the title at 4:01.

Rating: C. The match was entertaining enough for something that was going so fast but at the same time, the booking still doesn’t make a ton of sense. Balor has already shown that he can beat Lashley so now he needs to bring up the powers to win? And the extraordinary thing was just a powerbomb? I’m glad to see the Demon again but this wasn’t exactly the most logical thing in the world.

Here’s Alexa Bliss to announce the attendance record of 82,265. Cue R-Truth and Carmella for the Wrestlemania Dance Break (Remember those?).

We recap the main event of Raw Women’s Champion Ronda Rousey and Smackdown Women’s Champion Charlotte defending against Becky Lynch in a winner take all match. Rousey is the unstoppable force, Charlotte is Charlotte and Becky is here because she’s the hottest name in wrestling at the moment and won the Royal Rumble. Tonight the winner leaves with both titles and it’s the biggest women’s match in history.

Raw Women’s Title/Smackdown Women’s Title: Ronda Rousey vs. Charlotte vs. Becky Lynch

Lynch is challenging both. In a nod to her father and the Four Horsemen, Charlotte lance in a helicopter outside and walks into the stadium. Already inside, Joan Jett and the Blackhearts play Rousey to the ring. There is something so cool about watching Becky walk down the ramp in a wide shot as Cole talks about how she has started a movement. I’m not sure if that is the right term but it looked awesome. The bell rings and even a year later I still can’t believe this happened. The women’s division was a joke just a few years ago and now it’s the biggest match of the year. That’s hard to believe and it’s very cool.

They stare at each other for a good bit to start until Becky goes after Rousey’s arm. Rousey kicks her to the floor without much trouble and that means a Samoan drop into the barricade. Charlotte follows and takes Piper’s Pit but pops right back up for a fall away slam to send Rousey into the barricade for a change. That sets up the required Charlotte vs. Becky fight with Becky getting the better of things but can’t get the Figure Four, allowing Rousey to come and hammer away.

Charlotte breaks up an armbar attempt but gets pulled into a triangle choke over the ropes. Becky hits a running dropkick though and Rousey falls HARD onto the floor in a nasty crash. That leaves Charlotte to knee Becky in the head as the fans get behind Becky in a big way. Charlotte’s moonsault hits knees and Becky gets the Disarm-Her but Rousey make the save in a hurry. A double Natural Selection gives Charlotte two each and it’s Becky going outside this time.

For some reason Charlotte tries to slug it out with Rousey, earning herself a knee to the head. Charlotte pulls her into a Boston crab, drawing Becky in for her own save. Becky and Charlotte slug it out again until Charlotte is sent to the apron. Charlotte gets caught up top with a super Bexploder for two but Rousey drops both of them with a high crossbody for a double near fall. The double armbar goes on so Becky and Charlotte powerbomb her for the break. It took three attempts but they finally got out.

Everyone is down for a bit until Becky hits a Rock Bottom for two on Charlotte. Rousey goes after Becky and gets pulled straight into the Disarm-Her so she uses the ropes to power up in the corner. That’s fine with Becky, who puts it on again in the corner until Charlotte boots her in the face. Charlotte’s super Spanish Fly gets two but she might have banged up her knee. Rousey’s knee is banged up as well so Charlotte stomps away and grabs the Figure Four around the post.

After sending Becky into the barricade, Charlotte grabs the Figure Eight but Becky dives in off the top for another save. Just because, let’s bring in a table but Charlotte decks Becky for taking too long to set it up. Rousey shoves Charlotte off the top and turns the table over because she doesn’t need it. A double spear takes down Becky and Rousey so Charlotte sets up the table in the corner.

Charlotte sends Rousey face first into the table and spears Becky for two more. Back up and Charlotte gets hiptossed through the table, leaving Becky and Rousey to have the slugout we’ve been waiting for. They throw some serious hands but Piper’s Pit is countered into a crucifix (with Rousey’s shoulder a good six inches off the mat in a bad botch) to give Becky both titles at 21:28.

Rating: B. I don’t know if it’s because I didn’t watch it in one sitting this time around but I liked the match a good bit better on a second viewing. These three beat each other up and while Becky winning was the presumed finish, it wasn’t entirely a lock given who she was in there against. It was a heck of a fight and the three of them all came out looking great. This is much more historic than good, but it’s really rather good and that’s always a positive way to go out.

Rousey is ticked as Becky celebrates to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The positives are better than the negatives but not by much. There are some flat out bad matches on here but they are overcome by some great feelings with the faces winning all of the big matches for a change. That felt like an old school style as for the first time in what felt like forever, they didn’t cut the fans off for the sake of dragging things out until later. For once it felt like a season finale and that’s what Wrestlemania should be when it gets the chance. Good show, but it could have been a lot better.

How you ask? CUT THE SHOW DOWN! Look at how long this show is and tell me that it’s well put together. There is no need for a sixteen match card, especially with some of the matches that feel tacked on. All three Tag Team Title matches feel like they’re here for the sake of being here and some of the matches just need to be shortened. Either that or find a way to get people to the ring faster. I know it seems simple but how much of these shows are spent on ring entrances alone? Just find a way to shorten things, please.

Overall there are more good things than bad, but this isn’t a show that you need to watch in one sitting. As soon as you get to the point where the show is five hours plus an episode of Smackdown before it starts (and a Smackdown with more wrestling than usual at that), you’re hitting a firm ceiling of how much you can enjoy this. I know you can’t cut out big chunks, but find a way to get this under six hours. Do that and it’s a lot better, but that has been the case for years now and it keeps getting longer. Either way, at least we had enough nice stuff on here, but don’t watch it all at once.

Ratings Comparison

Tony Nese vs. Buddy Murphy

Original: C+

Redo: C

Women’s Battle Royal

Original: D

Redo: D

Revival vs. Zack Ryder/Curt Hawkins

Original: C

Redo: D+

Men’s Battle Royal

Original: D

Redo: D+

Brock Lesnar vs. Seth Rollins

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

AJ Styles vs. Randy Orton

Original: B-

Redo: C-

Usos vs. Shinsuke Nakamura/Rusev vs. The Bar vs. Aleister Black/Ricochet

Original: C+

Redo: B

Shane McMahon vs. The Miz

Original: C-

Redo: D-

Boss N Hug Connection vs. Natalya/Beth Phoenix vs. IIconics vs. Nia Jax/Tamina

Original: D

Redo: D

Kofi Kingston vs. Daniel Bryan

Original: A-

Redo: A

Samoa Joe vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Drew McIntyre vs. Roman Reigns

Original: C-

Redo: D

Batista vs. HHH

Original: D+

Redo: D

Baron Corbin vs. Kurt Angle

Original: F

Redo: D

Finn Balor vs. Bobby Lashley

Original: C

Redo: C

Ronda Rousey vs. Becky Lynch vs. Charlotte

Original: B

Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: C+

About the same all around, but some of those earlier ones are a good bit off. Still though, too long, despite some of the very good parts.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

https://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/04/08/wrestlemania-xxxv-so-much-for-no-happy-endings/

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Wrestlemania Count-Up – XXXIV (2019 Redo): Round Two

Wrestlemania XXXIV
Date: April 8, 2018
Location: Mercedes-Benz Superdome, New Orleans, Louisiana
Attendance: 78,133
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Jonathan Coachman, Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton
America the Beautiful: Chloe x Hallie

I’m not sure if it’s because I was in the stadium last year or something else, but this show was actually a bit more memorable than the previous few editions. Hopefully it’s just as good watching it back but you never can tell with these things. Brock Lesnar is defending the Universal Title against Roman Reigns in the main event because of course he is so let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Andre The Giant Memorial Battle Royal

JR and Jerry Lawler come out for commentary with Byron Saxton for a bit of a feel good moment. It’s a brawl to start with English getting backdropped out, much to the fans’ annoyance. Anderson dumps Konnor and Ziggler starts his tradition of hanging on to avoid elimination. There goes Hawkins as we still need to clear out a lot of the ring. Former partners R-Truth and Goldust shake hands with Goldust eliminating him, cutting off JR’s Bearcat Wright’s references.

Primo is out next as there’s almost nothing between these eliminations. Kanellis gets tossed and Ziggler hangs on again. Things settle down a bit unto Apollo knees Breeze as JR mocks Ziggler for always having to save himself. Viktor is gone too and the Revival beats on Ryder but he’s right back up. The Broski Boot is loaded up on Ziggler (JR: “Ziggler in trouble. Again.”) but Rawley Pounces Ryder out in a nice touch. A Liger kick from Gable eliminates Anderson and Titus gets rid of Gallows as we take a break.

Apollo getting backdropped out and Benjamin follows him…and let’s look at the announcers. We come back with Rhyno and the Revival gone and Kane eliminating Axel and Dallas. And now, we look at John Cena in the crowd as a fan, because I had forgotten about that stupid story. Back with Sin Cara eliminated by Corbin and Fandango dancing at Kane, earning himself an elimination off a single uppercut.

Corbin gets rid of Slater and Kane eliminates Gable, leaving us with the big power showdown. Everyone else jumps the monsters and it’s a superkick to Titus, setting a clothesline to get rid of him. We’re down to Corbin, Dillinger, Goldust, Rawley, Ziggler, Hardy and Kane as Goldust loads up Shattered Dreams on Dillinger. That’s broken up by Ziggler so Goldust ties him up for Shattered Dreams as well. Dillinger takes the kick but Ziggler eliminates Goldust.

That leaves us with a TEN vs. DELETE battle with a Twist of Fate and Dillinger is gone. Kane tosses Ziggler but gets eliminated by Corbin to get us down to Corbin, Hardy and Rawley. A fireman’s carry faceplant drops Hardy and the villains go for the elimination….but here’s the returning Bray Wyatt for Sister Abigail into an elimination for Rawley. Corbin drops Wyatt but gets backdropped out to give Matt the win at 16:36.

Rating: D+. It was a battle royal that got a lot of time and wasn’t all that interesting. The ending was a cool moment and it’s the best way to get everyone on the card, even if most of these people mean a grand total of nothing. It’s not a good match or even anything memorable, but at least it got the crowd warmed up….with an hour to go before the show itself starts.

Post match Matt thanks Bray and we get a hug, which JR deems a Wrestlemania moment.

Cruiserweight Title: Cedric Alexander vs. Mustafa Ali

Tournament final to crown a new champion after Enzo Amore was finally banished. Ali debuts his SubZero look, which he still uses a year later. They’re both very happy to be there and slaps hands before getting started. Cedric scores with a shoulder block but gets headscissored down as the announcers are right there to play up the power vs. speed idea, though you don’t exactly think of power when it comes to Alexander.

Now the 054 connects for two, the first time the move has ever only gotten a near fall. Another 054 misses and it’s a pair of spinning back elbows to Ali’s face. A third turns Ali inside out and the Lumbar Check makes Cedric champion at 12:21. Cedric immediately hugs the unconscious Ali in a nice show of sportsmanship.

Rating: B. I was pulling for Ali but it felt like a title match between two guys fighting with everything they had. Cedric was the favorite in the entire tournament but Ali came off looking like a star the whole way through. This was rather good stuff and should have been the Kickoff Show main event, though I’ll take a good match when I can.

Kickoff Show: Women’s Battle Royal

Dana Brooke, Becky Lynch, Sarah Logan, Lana, Bianca Belair, Naomi, Sonya Deville, Mandy Rose, Carmella, Peyton Royce, Natalya, Dakota Kai, Mickie James, Taynara Conti, Ruby Riott, Kairi Sane, Sasha Banks, Liv Morgan, Kavita Devi, Bayley

This was going to be the Fabulous Moolah Memorial Battle Royal but history intervened and it’s just a regular battle royal this time around. Paige and Beth Phoenix are on commentary and the former has some advice: don’t get thrown over the top rope. Becky comes out first, everyone else comes out, followed by Sasha and Bayley to fill out the field. Miss Money in the Bank Carmella (erg) poses with the briefcase to start and everyone gangs up on her for the easy elimination.

Deville, who got the elimination, poses in the big circle of women but Dana gets thrown in the middle instead. That means trash talk from Brooke and the big beatdown is on with Mandy tossing Dana. The NXT women team up to send the main roster women outside (through the ropes rather than over, which I can’t stand in battle royals) so we can get the WE ARE NXT pose.

Becky yells at Devi about orange being HER COLOR as some of the main roster women get back in. Kai eliminates Mandy as Paige declares Deville her favorite member of Absolution. We stop for the NXT women to triple team Deville, setting up Belair’s 450, because THAT MAKES SENSE IN A BATTLE ROYAL! Deville is out and we take a break, coming back with Sane being tossed after hitting the Insane Elbow thanks to more ganging up on Riott during the break.

Lana and Devi are tossed and Conti gets kicked out by the Squad. Becky and Belair have a less than thrilling slugout and the hair whip is incredibly loud. Belair misses a charge though and gets kicked out, followed by Kai kicking Naomi in the face. Banks gets rid of Kai without much effort and there goes Becky to a chorus of boos (I think Becky will be fine). Ruby knocks Mickie out and it’s Royce’s turn to kick people in the face.

Logan powerbombs her out as well though and we’re down to Morgan, Logan, Riott, Bayley, Banks, Natalya and Naomi, who is out on the floor (oh dear). For some reason Natalya decides to pose with her back turned to the Squad but manages to suplex Ruby and Sarah at the same time.

Bayley saves Sasha from a suplex and helps get rid of Natalya. Morgan is out as well and there goes Ruby. Banks sends Logan to the apron and Bayley knocks her out, leaving us with Banks and Bayley. The fans actually get on their feet to cheer for this one and the handshake…lets Bayley throw Banks out to a big reaction but Naomi gets back in for the Rear View. That’s enough for the win at 9:39.

Rating: F+. I had forgotten how annoying that ending was but it makes you realize just how stupid this whole thing was. Bayley and Banks would go on to have their weird semi-feud and then partnership over the year while Naomi has done NOTHING important since this match. You have something here with Bayley and the bright idea is to do the HAHA WE TRICKED YOU ending? That’s been done to death in battle royals and it’s not like this was anything more than a surprise ending, which was really stupid given how Bayley had been searching for anything important for the last year. This actually ticked me off again so well done.

Jojo introduces Chloe and Hallie to sing America the Beautiful, describing them as the “future of music”. Well if Jojo says it then it must be true.

The opening video shows shots of parties in New Orleans and, just like in 2014, features a tagline of Let The Good Times Roll. They couldn’t come up with anything else in four years? And the theme song is still Celebrate by Kid Rock. Ok it’s a catchy song, but is there nothing else (or no one else) that they could use?

Yay pyro! And cool set with the Mardi Gras mask, which looked awesome all night long.

I was in the stadium for this show, sitting in the lower bowl and looking not quite directly at the far post on the right side opposite the hard camera.

Intercontinental Title: Seth Rollins vs. Finn Balor vs. The Miz

Miz is defending and we get the new idea this year: 3D graphics for some of the entrances, including Miz who gets the Miz logo and various words to describe him, including MOVIE STAR. Miz sends the Miztourage to the back because he wants to do this himself for his newborn daughter. The weird part is you couldn’t see those in the stadium (obviously) but you could see them on the screens around the building, which made your head snap around a few times.

Balor isn’t the Demon here, but instead comes out with a bunch of LGBT people in rainbow Balor Club shirts labeled FOR EVERYONE. If nothing else, it’s awesome to see the stadium doing the Balor pose at once. This was set up with both guys beating Miz in one night, because Balor beating Miz after Miz had a long match with Rollins is totally the same thing.

They all go for the way too early rollups to start with Miz being sent outside. That means Rollins can miss a Stomp on Balor but a superkick to the ribs works just fine. Balor sends Rollins outside though and it’s the big running flip dive onto both of them for the first major pop of the night. Back in and basement dropkick gives Balor two on Miz but Rollins is back in with a high crossbody.

Miz finally gets to do something other than get beaten up as we look at Cena in the crowd again. Rollins grabs a double Blockbuster for two on Miz but he’s right back up with a knee to the ribs (not face Cole). The chinlock goes on, which shouldn’t be the case less than four minutes into a triple threat. Back up and a neckbreaker gets two on Miz as they’re just trading moves until we get to the big stuff. Another chinlock seems to annoy Balor so he gets up again and hits the double stomp to Miz’s ribs.

Rollins is back in for a Sling Blade to Balor, setting up a suicide dive to Balor and Miz. A superkick drops Balor again but Miz comes in with a DDT for two. Miz goes with the strategy by bending Balor’s knee around the ropes and slapping on the Figure Four. The frog splash from Rollins (from out of nowhere for an awesome visual) breaks it up and all three of them head outside.

Balor escapes the barricade powerbomb and dropkicks them both into the barricade instead. Back in again and 1916 gets two on Rollins but Miz breaks up the Coup de Grace. Instead of the Tower of Doom though it’s the buckle bomb to Miz and a superplex into the Falcon Arrow to Balor. The Skull Crushing Finale gives Miz two on Rollins and they’re all down again.

Balor does his hop over the ropes in the corner but gets crotched for trying the Coup de Grace again. It’s just not working this time dude. Miz goes up top with Balor and catches a springboarding Rollins with something close to a super Skull Crushing Finale. Balor breaks it up with a Coup de Grace and hits a second on Miz but the Stomp breaks that up too. Another Stomp hits Miz to give Rollins the pin and the title at 15:37.

Rating: B-. This might have been a few minutes too long but Rollins winning was a fine call as he’s more than over enough and kind of fits the Workrate Champion idea to perfection. Miz can come back and break the all time days record later and Balor is over no matter what. Not a great match, but a very hot opener and the fans were into everything here.

We recap the Smackdown Women’s Title match, which is billed as the BIGGEST WOMEN’S MATCH IN WRESTLEMANIA HISTORY. My how times change. Anyway Charlotte is the queen of everything and Asuka won the Royal Rumble to earn this shot. It’s absolutely a dream match with Charlotte being Charlotte and Asuka still being undefeated.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Asuka

Charlotte is defending and gets the full Ric Flair theme song, complete with a HHH from Wrestlemania XXX inspired entrance, meaning soldiers to help her off a throne and take her robe. Asuka on the other hand gets the CGI masks with rainbow colored lines surrounding them, which look cool on screen but live….not so much. They lock up to start and take turns flipping out of wristlocks for an early standoff.

Charlotte loads up a monkey flip but instead trips the leg for a failed Figure Eight attempt. You can feel the intensity here and it’s working well so far. Some chops to the chest (and one to the face) have Asuka in trouble but she’s right back with a hip attack to knock Charlotte outside. Back in and it’s time to start in on the arm but Charlotte gets in a backbreaker into an STO. Charlotte uses a Backpack Stunner to get out of a sleeper and a knee to the back of the head keeps Asuka in trouble.

It’s enough trouble for Charlotte to go up top for the moonsault….which is countered into a triangle for a sweet escape. Charlotte reverses into a Boston crab until Asuka makes the rope. A sliding kick to the face knocks Charlotte backwards and it’s back to the arm as Asuka continues to follow her game plan. They head to the apron with Asuka suplexing her out to the floor in a good looking crash. Sometimes you need to just go with a big spot like that and it worked very well.

Back in and they stare each other down until Asuka just erupts with strikes to the face. A missile dropkick gets two and Asuka stomps on the back. Charlotte is fine enough for the chops to catch Asuka on top and it’s a super Spanish Fly for two with the fans getting much more into things in a hurry. Natural Selection is countered into something like an Octopus Hold from Asuka’s back for a cool change of pace.

Charlotte tries to flip out and into the Figure Eight but Asuka kicks her in the head for a block. Well that’s certainly to the point. The Asuka Lock is blocked and Charlotte hits a very good spear for two more as the fans are WAY into this. With nothing else working, Charlotte goes to the Figure Eight and bridges up with one arm….and Asuka taps at 13:05 in a shocker.

Rating: A-. I don’t get shocked by results very often but I was actually stunned to see how this went. I would have bet money on Asuka walking out as champion here but Charlotte winning was far from a ridiculous result. Now the problem is what this did to Asuka, as she only started to recover from the loss nearly a year later. Charlotte would lose the title to Carmella two days later, bringing some dark days to the belt. This however was anything but dark, with an outstanding match between two stars.

Post match Asuka gets the mic and says Charlotte was ready for her in the ultimate sign of respect.

With Charlotte on the ramp and Asuka in the ring, a referee tells Cena something that makes him get out of his seat and run up the ramp. You really couldn’t wait until the women were gone so they could have the full moment?

US Title: Bobby Roode vs. Jinder Mahal vs. Randy Orton vs. Rusev

Orton is defending and it’s one fall to a finish. Aiden English (now bald, meaning he shaved his head since the end of the battle royal when he had hair) handles Rusev’s entrance and we get my favorite shot every year: a closeup of someone with the camera swinging around to show the stadium crowd in front of them. There’s something so cool about seeing just how big of a stage they’re really on. Anyway, Rusev is crazy over and easily the crowd favorite. Does anyone else see an issue with Orton’s music saying “I hear voices in my head” while his Titantron says IN MY VEINS?

While you think about that, Orton and Mahal are sent outside, leaving Rusev to dropkick (yes dropkick) Roode to the floor. A RUSEV DAY Cannonball off the apron takes Orton and Mahal down again but Roode is back in with a Blockbuster for two on Rusev. The other two get back in and it’s Mahal getting beaten up by Orton and Roode before being tossed right back to the floor. Orton hits the top rope superplex on Roode with Rusev and Mahal diving back in for the save.

That’s enough for Mahal to ask Rusev for a partnership but Rusev doesn’t even bother waiting before hitting Mahal with a spinning belly to back suplex for two. Roode makes it worse by busting Mahal’s spine and hitting the GLORIOUS pose, only to have Orton make a save this time.

That leaves Orton alone in the ring and it’s the hanging DDT on Rusev. The RKO hits English, Rusev and Mahal so it’s Roode making a save of his own. Roode blocks the RKO and plants Orton with the Glorious DDT as Mahal saves. The Machka Kick drops Mahal but Sunil Singh offers a distraction, letting Mahal hit the Khallas for the pin on Rusev at 8:14. You could literally feel the energy go out of the crowd.

Rating: D+. There was some hard work in there but this was the definition of Vince saying screw the audience because it’s all about what I want. Rusev was one of the most popular guys in the company and had been for months but instead we get Mahal, who was an all time bomb as WWE Champion getting to pin Rusev.

It’s not like there was even a long term plan as Mahal would lose the title a mere eight days later. Rusev would indeed get the title nearly nine months later, after his popularity had fallen way down, meaning it was acceptable to give the fans what they want. This really hurt the show and it’s going to be hard to recover.

We recap Ronda Rousey/Kurt Angle vs. HHH/Stephanie McMahon and yeah I think this might help the recovery process. After being at Wrestlemania XXXI and attacking Stephanie, Rousey made her official WWE debut at the Royal Rumble earlier in the year. She wanted to go to Wrestlemania and since she was (at the time) the most dominant female UFC fighter of all time, Stephanie wanted to mold her into a WWE star.

Angle, who had been screwed over by Stephanie and HHH before, warned Ronda that they would mess with her too. That didn’t sit well with Rousey, who beat both of them up on the way to this mixed tag match. Naturally we got a lot of Stephanie workout videos because she’s STEPHANIE and that makes her some wrestling legend. It’s sickening, and I was waiting on her to survive the armbar in the match. It was clear that this was going to be full of smoke and mirrors, but the question is how well Rousey is going to do in her debut. This is one of the main events of the show and something a lot of people really wanted to see.

Ronda Rousey/Kurt Angle vs. HHH/Stephanie McMahon

HHH and Stephanie come out on matching motorcycles (flanked by four women on their own motorcycles), with Stephanie’s biker look (including the leather pants) making me a lot less annoyed at her. Cole: “Even though Stephanie is a former Women’s Champion, this is her Wrestlemania in-ring debut!” WWE pretending that Stephanie was a wrestler is one of their more interesting character tweaks. Rousey gets a huge reaction and of course smiles at the crowd, as is her custom. Cole talks about two people starting in UFC and coming to WWE: Ken Shamrock and now Rousey. So they’re not Dan Severn fans either?

The fans are WAY behind Rousey as they stare each other down in the middle. Stephanie shoves Rousey in the face because Stephanie just never learns. A hair pull doesn’t prove to be the brightest idea either so Stephanie bails to the apron so the guys can start us off. Angle (very badly) punches at HHH and the beating is on in the corner. A hammerlock keeps HHH does as we’re just waiting for this to explode as it should be doing.

Stephanie manages to lure Rousey in though and Angle gets low bridged to the floor. Cole calls this “that McMahon instinct” as the worship is already a lot to take. Angle gets sent into the steps and Rousey is about to lose it because she can’t intervene. Some more cheap shots from Stephanie keep Rousey angry and a spinebuster gives HHH two. A front facelock keeps Angle down but he gets a boot up in the corner.

Stephanie chokes Angle and HHH nearly hits her by mistake but it’s still too early for the hot tag. A suplex drops HHH again but Stephanie runs around and pulls Rousey off the apron. HHH gets whipped over the corner for the real crash and you can see the panic in Stephanie. The hot tag brings in Rousey (Graves: “CALL THE COPS!!!”) who SPRINTS over to Stephanie and throws her down with a suplex. After the required tug of the shorts, Rousey unloads with rights and lefts in the corner as the fans are already losing it. The release throw sends Stephanie back into the corner and Graves is terrified.

The fans want and receive the armbar….but Stephanie blocks it. Yes the hold that UFC fighters were powerless again is a simple block for Stephanie as the crowd’s soul is slapped down again. Stephanie blocks it a second time and rakes the eyes (Cole: “Complete manipulation of the rules!” Ignore the complete manipulation of reality and focus on those rules man.”), setting up a double arm crank as the fans try to process that they’re really doing this.

Stephanie even mocks Rousey, who grabs her by the throat and hits the swinging Samoan drop for two with HHH pulling the referee. Rousey: “I’m going to continue beating up your wife ok?” HHH pulls her out as well, apparently not a fan of such chatty opponents. Angle is back up and sends HHH over the announcers’ table but gets thrown onto the Spanish table. After a slow crawl, HHH is back in and sees Rousey, who is ready to fight. HHH puts the referee in the corner and sizes Rousey up and the beating is on in the corner.

A legsweep looks to set up the swinging Samoan drop but Stephanie makes a save. I know I’m not a big HHH fan a lot of the time but he just made Rousey look like the biggest star in the history of the division. Rousey chases Stephanie outside though and has to adjust the gear again, allowing Stephanie to post her. Angle is back in for some belly to belly suplexes and the rolling Germans but the ankle lock is countered. The Pedigree is countered as well and HHH gets catapulted into the corner, setting up the Angle Slam for two with no one making a save.

Stephanie breaks up the ankle lock and yells at Angle, who catches the boot to the ribs. HHH has to save his wife and Pedigrees Angle for two with Rousey making her own save this time. With Angle down, HHH loads Rousey up for a powerbomb but gets hurricanranaed (!) into the armbar on HHH (I completely bought that as the finish live) until Stephanie grabs a choke.

That’s reversed into an armbar and Stephanie has the gall to block it AGAIN. Angle ankle locks HHH, who rolls Angle into Rousey for the real save. Rousey and Angle get posted and it’s time for stereo Pedigrees, both of which are broken up. The armbar is slapped on again and this time Rousey uses the leverage to pull back and Stephanie finally taps at 20:37.

Rating: A. That’s not even on a sliding scale because Rousey knocked that out harder than she knocked out Alexis Davis. She looked like she’s been doing this for ten years and had one of the best debut matches I’ve ever seen. Everyone else was nailing it too and I got completely sucked into it both live and watching it back because all of the stuff was that good. Don’t have Stephanie block the armbar so often and this is an A+ easy.

That was the only downgrade, even though you knew full well it was coming. To be fair though, Stephanie did tap out clean in the end so it wasn’t the most ridiculous thing ever. Well the first part was but not the finish. After this, how can you now see Rousey as the star that she already was?

Stephanie has to be helped out, as she should. She would get armbarred again the next night for a bonus.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: New Day vs. Bludgeon Brothers vs. Usos

Kofi wastes no time in hitting Trouble in Paradise on Jey but Harper pulls him outside before the count. Jimmy gets sent into the steps and Harper crashes against Big E. against the barricade. With no one else to beat up, Woods gets powerbombed against the post, leaving Rowan to splash Kofi and Jey back inside. The mostly done Jey is thrown outside and Big E. gets knocked off the apron. Jimmy comes back in for a pair of superkicks and Jey is back up for stereo kicks to Harper’s head in the corner.

A jumping enziguri hits Harper and a superkick knocks Rowan to the floor, setting up a double suplex on the outside. Harper catches Kofi with a swinging release Boss Man Slam but gets caught with a double superkick on top. Rowan breaks up the Tower of Doom so Kofi charges at Harper, only to get powerbombed by Rowan. An assisted super sitout powerbomb finishes Kofi to give Harper and Rowan the titles at 5:55.

Rating: C-. The time cuts aside, this wasn’t the worst match in the world with the Usos and the New Day giving it all they had against the monsters but not being able to stop them. The Bludgeon Brothers were the first time a team other than the Usos or New Day had held the belts in over a year so this was long, long overdue and the right call.

Here’s what’s coming to the Network, most of which actually happened for a change.

Here’s a fired up John Cena for his match with Undertaker. This comes after weeks of Cena calling out Undertaker for Wrestlemania because Undertaker seemingly retired after last year’s show. Cena came off as the biggest jerk in this feud and acting like Undertaker owed him something. There was no confirmation that Undertaker was going to be here, hence him sitting in the crowd earlier.

That’s the other stupid part of the whole thing: Cena kept talking about how he had no path to Wrestlemania, because JOHN CENA couldn’t get a match. He gave some lame excuse about how this was the only match that mattered and it didn’t do a thing to make up for the consistently annoying lines from commentary about Cena possibly being left out of Wrestlemania. I get what they were going for, but come on already.

Anyway Cena is ready to go but here’s a referee to say not so fast. Cena is disappointed and the lights go out. It’s only Elias though and Cena heads back to his seat as Elias sings about it being his night. That’s enough for Cena who runs in and beats Elias up before looking disappointed again. Cole: “I guess that would be a Wrestlemania moment right?” He goes up the ramp but stops….and the lights go out again. A spotlight hits the ring with Undertaker’s hat, coat and boots, which are hit by lighting (looks awful on the Network, looked great when you didn’t see it coming in the stadium. They’re gone, and the gong strikes.

Undertaker vs. John Cena

I know he’s been old for ten years, but that entrance live, especially in the stadium, is chilling. Cole of course can’t SHUT UP, saying everything he can think of, including calling them the two greatest performers of all time. Undertaker goes straight at him in the corner to start and hits the jumping clothesline. Old School connects and Undertaker hits some running clotheslines in the corner. Snake Eyes into the big boot into the big leg have Cena rocked but the chokeslam is escaped.

Cena’s belly to back connects but Undertaker sits up before the Shuffle, making Cena fall down in fear. The chokeslam into the Tombstone finishes Cena at 2:48. The more I think of this one, the more I like it. Cena ran his mouth for so long and Undertaker annihilated him here, just as he should have. While a lot of people will be annoyed at not getting a full form match between these two, I’d rather they do this than have Undertaker look back in a fifteen minute match.

Video on the Hall of Fame ceremony.

Here’s the Hall of Fame Class, which really doesn’t need to air on the show. They already get a whole evening to themselves. Do we really need ten minutes on Wrestlemania too?

Jeff Jarrett (eh sure, though it’s still weird to see him here)

Mark Henry (still not sure on him, though his documentary was great)

Hillbilly Jim (I’m a Kentucky boy but come on)

Ivory (she looks better now than she did during her career)

Jarius JJ Robertson (Warrior Award)

Dudley Boyz (yep)

Goldberg (yep, though I’d call the Dudleys more appropriate headliners)

Oh and Kid Rock, this year’s celebrity inductee, wasn’t there because he had a concert.

We recap Daniel Bryan/Shane McMahon vs. Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens. Bryan somehow overcame his injuries and returned to the ring in something I still can barely believe. Owens and Zayn had tormented Smackdown boss Shane for months and then attacked Bryan for firing them the night he was announced as being cleared. Therefore it’s a tag match with Owens and Zayn fighting for their jobs. Yeah that’s all well and good. The point here is Bryan actually getting back in the ring, which is almost impossible to imagine.

Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens vs. Daniel Bryan/Shane McMahon

Owens and Zayn beat McMahon up on Smackdown to cover for Shane’s legitimate medical issues. Chris Jericho was apparently on red phone alert for this show with a plan to have him fly in from a Fozzy show on the corporate jet in case Shane couldn’t make the show. Bryan gets a special entrance with a weird military/Terminator themed video showing a target on the Superdome before looking at the YES Movement spreading throughout the world in a cool moment. You can feel the emotions in Bryan as he comes down the aisle and it’s an amazing sight to behold.

Owens and Zayn jump the good guys from behind and Shane gets thrown over the barricade. Bryan takes a Helluva kick and the apron powerbomb to leave him laying. Medics come out to check on Bryan as yes, they actually are trying to stretch this out even further. Shane is willing to fight on his own and unloads with the really bad punches to Owens in the corner.

There’s the jumping back elbow but Shane grabs his stomach due to the diverticulitis (the same thing that ruined Lesnar’s UFC career). A DDT drops Sami but Owens gets in a shot to the stomach to cut Shane off. We settle down into a regular match with Sami elbowing the ribs and going for one cover after another. Owens steps on the ribs and applauds Bryan for such a great return. A t-bone suplex gives Sami two and a superkick into the Blue Thunder Bomb is good for the same. The fans don’t care about this whatsoever and there’s no reason for them to.

With Bryan STILL being tended to at ringside, it’s just a big waiting game until Bryan gets back up and makes the hot tag. The Helluva Kick misses in the corner and Sami gets tied in the Tree of Woe. Coast to Coast hits but Shane can’t follow up because of the stomach. Owens drops the frog splash on Shane but Bryan dives in for the save to bring the fans back to life. The hot tag is cut off though and we hit the chinlock to make the fans wait a little longer. A belly to back suplex gets Shane out of trouble though and there’s the tag, with Bryan taking his time before getting in for an awesome moment.

House is cleaned and it’s the moonsault over Sami into the running clothesline. Owens comes back in and Bryan gets them in opposite corners for alternating running dropkicks. Sami is back with a Helluva Kick for two on Bryan and Owens superkicks Shane to the floor. The Pop Up Powerbomb gets two more and Owens is shocked at the kickout. Shane dives onto Owens, leaving Sami to yell at Bryan for coming back and punch him in the face. That’s enough for Bryan and the fight is on, including the YES Kicks. The running knee sets up the YES Lock to make Sami tap at 15:24.

Rating: C+. This was two matches in one with the rather boring beatdown of Shane for the first half before Bryan came in and gave the fans exactly what they wanted for the second half. It was all about Bryan and that’s all it was supposed to be. The idea that he actually made it back to the ring is amazing and one of the most surprising stories you’ll ever see in wrestling. He deserved a big moment like this and that’s what we got here, albeit after Shane got in his own time of course.

Attendance announcement, with pyro because it’s Wrestlemania.

We recap Nia Jax vs. Alexa Bliss. They were friends, but Jax found out that Bliss was making fun of her behind her back. Jax went into monster mode and chased after Bliss and her friend Mickie James, setting up this match. Now there’s no reason this shouldn’t be about thirty seconds long, but it’s Wrestlemania and what matters is getting on the card and having a long match instead of doing what makes sense.

Raw Women’s Title: Alexa Bliss vs. Nia Jax

Bliss, with James in her corner, is defending and is lowered down to the stage on a platform for a nice touch. We get the Big Match Intros and Bliss immediately backs up as she should. Jax gets smart and runs Mickie over before the bell rings to send her outside for a heck of a beatdown. Bliss tries to intervene and gets glared back to the ring, leaving James to take a Samoan drop on the floor.

We get back inside for the opening bell and Bliss slaps her in the face. That earns a scream from Nia so Bliss screams back in true scream queen fashion. A gorilla press slam has Bliss bailing to the floor and it’s time to leave, only to have Nia run her over again. Back in and Bliss pokes her in the eye before going after the knee in a smart move.

What’s not a smart move is this match already going nearly three minutes with Bliss getting in any significant offense. A basement dropkick keeps Jax in trouble but a guillotine choke is easily countered via an overhead belly to belly suplex. Jax goes shoulder first into the post as the fans are quiet all over again. Twisted Bliss to a standing Nia on the floor gives Bliss another knockdown, setting up the short DDT for two back inside.

Bliss yells at her so Nia tells her to shut up already and the destruction begins. Another poke to the eye is no sold and Bliss gets whipped hard into the buckles. Bliss goes to the eye again to get out of the Samoan drop but Jax drives her into the corner and then drops her. That’s not enough as it’s a super Samoan drop to give Jax the pin and the title at 9:02.

Rating: D-. What were they thinking here? The whole story was that Bliss was all talk and survived because of Nia but then she hangs with Nia for the better part of ten minutes? This should have been thirty seconds long with Bliss getting the title back later on (as she did in June) after coming back from getting squashed. Just a bad idea all around here, save for Jax FINALLY winning the title.

We recap AJ Styles defending the Smackdown World Title against Shinsuke Nakamura. They had a classic match in Japan and a lot of fans wanted to see it again in WWE. Nakamura won the Royal Rumble and the match was on, with both guys trying to get in the other’s head on the way to New Orleans. So yeah, they’re just going with “it’s a dream match” for the build, which works just fine.

Smackdown World Title: AJ Styles vs. Shinsuke Nakamura

Nakamura is challenging and gets played to the ring by Nita Strauss (awesome guitar player and rather gorgeous at the same time). The army of violinists and drummers help too. Since WWE can’t go more than five minutes without making some kind of a mistake, AJ is billed as Universal Champion. They lock up to start with Nakamura getting the better of it with some knees to the ribs.

Good Vibrations is blocked and AJ gets in his own knee before starting in on the back. Styles grabs a chinlock for a bit before dropkicking him to the floor. That’s not the best idea though as it’s a kick to the head to stagger Styles and the champ is in trouble for the first time. Nakamura’s middle rope kick to the face gets two and that’s a COME ON to set up the strikes to the face.

The running knee to the ribs in the corner gets two but AJ is right back with a belly to back faceplant. A sliding forearm into the pumphandle gutbuster gets two on Nakamura as they’re trading big spots. AJ’s springboard is countered into the Landslide (Samoan driver) for two but Nakamura needs a minute before following up. With nothing else working, Nakamura goes with the kicks, which are countered into the Calf Crusher.

Since it’s Nakamura, that’s reversed into a triangle choke, which AJ powers into something like a fisherman’s buster for another double knockdown. It’s Nakamura up first and trying a running knee in the corner but the bad knee hit the buckle instead. AJ is right back with a Phenomenal Forearm for two in the required kickout of the first finisher.

The springboard 450 hits knees and Nakamura grabs a small package for two of his own. They slug it out until AJ nails the Pele but can’t follow up, allowing Nakamura to knee him in the back of the head for a much nearer fall. The reverse exploder looks to set up the Kinshasa but AJ rolls through into the Styles Clash for the pin to retain at 20:21.

Rating: B+. This was close to being a classic but it’s really just a very good match instead. Part of the problem here is how late the match came in the show. The fans were starting to get worn down and there was only so much energy left in the people. Also it never quite got to the epic level that they were shooting for with Nakamura never really getting the close near falls that he needed to take it to another level. Still that, very good and worthy of a Wrestlemania title match.

We recap the Kickoff Show. This is another few minutes that could be cut off.

Raw Tag Team Titles: The Bar vs. Braun Strowman/???

The Bar is defending after Strowman won a battle royal to become #1 contenders despite not having a partner. Therefore the big question for over a month is who would the partner be. The Bar comes out on a Mardi Gras float, complete with people in large headed costumes for a cool visual. There’s no partner for Strowman, who breaks up the float before coming to the ring.

Strowman and the kid get in the ring where the kid is introduced as Nicholas (the son of referee John Cone). Cole: “This is really happening.” He’s never been more right. Oh and the search for a partner and introduction took about four and a half minutes, again because this show can just keep going. Strowman takes Sheamus into the corner with no problem to start before beating up Cesaro as well.

Nicholas is terrified (as he should be) as Cesaro dropkicks Strowman in the knee. A double suplex lets Sheamus drop a top rope knee, setting up an assisted swanton from Sheamus’ shoulders. Strowman comes back with a double crossbody and backdrops Sheamus over the top, bouncing him off the post in the process. To cap it off, Strowman tags Nicholas in. The kid is terrified and tags Strowman back in for the powerslam to Cesaro for the pin and the titles at 3:58.

Rating: F. I….what do you want from me here? This was an idea that completely failed because WWE had no idea what to do here and this is all they could do. Put Heath Slater or someone in there, or have Strowman do a rendition of Me And My Shadow and have him win it by himself. It was a joke that was literally forgotten the next night and stretched the show out even more because they couldn’t just cut this and put Strowman ANYWHERE else. I’m sure Matt Hardy had to win the battle royal right?

Wrestlemania 35 is in New York/Jersey. You don’t hear New Jersey mentioned here, but I guess it’s just implied.

We recap Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns for the Universal Title. It’s the latest attempt to make Reigns feel like the mega star because the first few times didn’t take. Therefore he won the Elimination Chamber (beating Strowman after Strowman eliminated everyone else), THIS TIME FOR SURE! Lesnar has been champion for a year and barely ever defends the title, because that was so successful the first few times. Their fights over the last few weeks get the music video treatment.

Raw World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns

Reigns is challenging and WOW the fans are not happy to see him. To make it a little better, Brock drives him into the corner for the shoulders to the ribs, followed by the German suplexes. Reigns pops up with a Superman Punch to send Brock to the floor as they’re starting fast again. Back in and a clothesline knocks Lesnar over the top and out to the floor as the fans chant things to amuse themselves.

Lesnar catches him with a belly to belly on the floor and another one drops Reigns on his head. There’s the required CM PUNK chant and a third belly to belly sends Reigns face first into the announcers’ table because Brock didn’t realize how much room he had. Back in and Lesnar throws another German suplex, declaring it SUPLEX CITY B****. More suplexes ensue because that’s what Lesnar does in a big time match. Brock gets tired of that and loads up the announcers’ table but Reigns posts him for a much needed breather.

A spear puts Lesnar onto (not through) another table as the fans boo the heck out of this. Or maybe they’re mad about losing a beach ball. The Superman Punch into a pair of spears gets two and now the fans are definitely happy with a beach ball. Brock blocks a spear with a knee to the face that brings Graves out of his chair.

The first F5 gets two and virtually no reaction from the crowd. Another F5 gets another two and Lesnar seems to be getting angrier. To switch it up, another F5 gets another two and Lesnar seems to be getting angrier. The fans declare it boring so Lesnar takes him outside for the fourth F5 through the announcers’ table. Lesnar takes it back inside and stands there as the fans do something else in the crowd that goes from cheering to booing during the same closeup.

The fifth F5 gets two so Lesnar takes the gloves off at Heyman’s orders. The fans call it awful as Lesnar hammers away to bust Reigns open. It’s quite the gusher but Reigns slips out of the F5 and hits a pair of spears for two. Another spear is countered into the sixth F5 to retain the title at 15:51.

Rating: D+. Well of course he does. The problem here is that there is good action in the match but it’s too much of the same stuff and the fans having none of it that took away its value. Couple that with knowing that we’re just waiting on even more Reigns title shots and promos about needing to be champion and there was no way this was going to work. The fans (including myself) were done with this WAY before the match started and that’s all there was to it.

Reigns gets cleaned up and we get the long video package. Back in the stadium, Reigns leaves and the show ends. I stood around for a long time while this was going on because the video doesn’t play in the stadium and it wasn’t clear if the show was over or not.

Overall Rating: C-. I know I (and a lot of other people) say it over and over but it’s just too long. There is a limit to how long you can sit watching wrestling in person or at home and Wrestlemania has blown past that for years now. At some point you just stop caring and there’s very little that can be done to fix such a problem. They need to do something because this isn’t going to work no matter what they do. Cut out a lot of stuff and it’s a great show, but the whole package didn’t work.

There’s a lot of good stuff in here, such as the opener, AJ vs. Nakamura, Charlotte vs. Asuka, the mixed tag and a few other moments here and there. The problem is there’s so much other stuff that either doesn’t work (the main event, the Raw Women’s Title match and the Raw Tag Team Titles are great places to start) that it really doesn’t work. Get rid of some of that and the show is that much better.

Overall, it comes down to the problem of WWE not listening to the fans. They can throw out as much good content as they want, but if you do it to annoy the fans (the US Title match) or to stretch things out even further past its expiration point (the Universal Title), it’s going to come back to mess things up. There is so much on here that fans don’t want to see and WWE just won’t fix it.

That doesn’t help the length either. If you have a show where the final match is something the fans do not want to see, you’re going to have them sitting there, already annoyed at other things in the show, for hours waiting to see something that only WWE seems interested in. How is that supposed to be appealing for over seven hours? Cut it down, give us something else to cheer for, and remember that Wrestlemania is supposed to be about the best of the best, not everyone on the roster.

Ratings Comparison

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Original: D-

Redo: D+

Mustafa Ali vs. Cedric Alexander

Original: B-

Redo: B

Wrestlemania Women’s Battle Royal

Original: D+

Redo: F+

Seth Rollins vs. The Miz vs. Finn Balor

Original: B

Redo: B-

Charlotte vs. Asuka

Original: A-

Redo: A

Jinder Mahal vs. Rusev vs. Randy Orton vs. Bobby Roode

Original: D

Redo: D+

Stephanie McMahon/HHH vs. Kurt Angle/Ronda Rousey

Original: A-

Redo: A

New Day vs. Bludgeon Brothers vs. Usos

Original: D+

Redo: C-

Undertaker vs. John Cena

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Daniel Bryan/Shane McMahon vs. Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens

Original: C+

Redo: C+

Nia Jax vs. Alexa Bliss

Original: D+

Redo: D-

Shinsuke Nakamura vs. AJ Styles

Original: B

Redo: B+

Braun Strowman/Nicholas vs. The Bar

Original: F

Redo: F

Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: D

Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: C-

This is an interesting one as most of the matches are within the same ballpark but I liked the show a lot better the first time around. Maybe the good was more fun just after the show, but this really didn’t do it for me nearly as well on another viewing. It’s watchable, but definitely not a very good show.

Here’s the original if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/04/14/wrestlemania-xxxiv-the-same-old-story/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

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