Impact Wrestling – May 11, 2023: The Way I Like My Impact

Impact Wrestling
Date: May 11, 2023
Location: Cicero Stadium, Cicero, Illinois
Commentators: Tom Hannifan, Matthew Rehwoldt

We are inching closer to Under Siege and the World Title situation is looking interesting. PCO is scheduled to challenge Steve Maclin for the title and that is not exactly sitting well with the champ. Other than that, we have some matches rapidly being set, with Trinity possibly being added to the card. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

Masha Slamovich vs. Killer Kelly

Kelly crawls around to start and rolls a kicking Slamovich up for two. Back up and Kelly knocks her to the floor without much trouble, setting up the running kick to the chest. Some clotheslines drop Slamovich again, followed by a delayed release fisherman’s suplex for two. Slamovich runs her over and rips at Kelly’s face for a bit.

We hit the reverse chinlock but Kelly powers up and sends her into the corner for the break. Some Al Snow trapping headbutts set up a suplex into the corner, followed by a German suplex for two. Slamovich kicks her in the ribs for her own two, setting up a sunset driver for another near fall. Kelly shrugs it off and hits a Death Valley Driver, setting up the Killer Klutch. Slamovich is up with a rope walk and flips back onto Kelly for the pin at 8:42.

Rating: C+. Good stuff here, as Kelly continues to impress. Slamovich needed the win more here though, as she has fallen mostly through the floor in recent months. The talent is there, but at some point you have to win something. The same is true for Kelly, though she has never had the big opportunities that Slamovich has already earned. Nice opener here, and a change of pace from the usual fast paced starts to the show.

Kenny King gives Sheldon Jean a pep talk before his match.

We look back at Trinity’s debut last week.

Trinity wants the Knockouts Title and has an open contract for Under Siege. Jai Vidal comes in and grabs a quick photo, much to Trinity’s confusion.

Nick Aldis vs. Sheldon Jean

Kenny King is on commentary. Aldis headlocks him down a few times but it’s too early for the King’s Lynn Cloverleaf. They head outside with King offering a distraction so Jean can get in a cheap shot to take over. Back in and a side kick gives Jean two but Aldis fights up without much trouble. A Michinoku Driver gets two on Jean but he catches Aldis on top. With that broken up, Aldis drops the top rope elbow and the King’s Lynn Cloverleaf is good for the tap at 3:30.

Rating: C. Jean is decent enough to be one of the new designated jobbers whose name we know, though that might not have the longest shelf life. This was of course all about Aldis though, who looked fine in his return. That being said, at some point he is going to have to show that he can be more interesting and that has been an issue for him for years.

Dirty Dango and Joe Hendry are talking about who attacked Santino Marella when Johnny Swinger and Zicky Dice come in. Hendry and the two goons accuse each other, setting up Swinger vs. Dango. Well, after they call Santino to make it official. With the villains gone, Dango invites Hendry to his birthday party, where Hendry would be the only guest. Ok then.

We get part three of the Frankie Kazarian interviews, this time talking about his return and quest to become World Champion. Last year he won the X-Division Title again and used Option C but came up short again, though the World Title is still a goal. We talk about the various things he has done, many of which had nothing to do with the title. He is willing to fight anyone around, and now he’s the veteran, which is a spot that he loves to have. This really didn’t tell us much, but getting to know wrestlers a bit more like this is a great idea and that has been the case here.

Decay vs. Good Hands

The Hands introduce themselves and mock the Chicago Cubs like good villains should. Skyler and Steve start things off, with Steve taking him down for a neck crank. Taurus comes in for a modified What’s Up, followed by the running hurricanrana. Steve’s monkey flip is broken up though and a cheap shot (Tom: “Steve was blindsided!” The guy is legally blind so that’s not nice.) lets Hotch take him down again.

Steve’s double finger bite doesn’t work and it’s a belly to back suplex to cut him off. Steve Downward Spirals his way out of trouble, allowing the hot tag to Taurus. With Brian Myers coming out to watch, Taurus cleans house and everything breaks down. Steve dives onto Skyler but gets dropped by Myers. A Stunner over the ropes staggers Taurus into a middle rope G9 (Samoan drop/Blockbuster combination) for the pin at 5:09.

Rating: C+. Kind of a slow match but Myers hooking up with the Good Hands is a better move than having them work for Bully Ray, so they did something smart. Decay losing is a little weird, but it’s a fine enough way to establish the new unit. The Good Hands are, well, good hands, so there should be a place for them for awhile.

Post match Myers poses with the Good Hands.

Flashback Moment of the Week: Sarita/Taylor Wilde b. Beautiful People to win the Knockouts Tag Team Titles.

Steve Maclin is sick of Champagne Singh and Shera screwing up so he fires both of them. Singh and Shera have an idea.

Post break, Singh and Shera jump Heath.

Impact Wrestling World Title: Rhino vs. Steve Maclin

Maclin is defending and we get the Big Match Intros for a nice touch. They hit the stall button for a bit to start before trading arm control. Rhino powers him into the corner and Maclin has to stop for a breather. Some chops into a hiptoss look to set up the Gore but Maclin bails to the floor. That’s fine with Rhino, who crotches him on the barricade, only for a Stunner over the top to cut Rhino off.

Back in and Maclin goes after the leg, with some rams into the apron to make it worse. The middle rope headbutt misses for Maclin though and the slugout is on. Maclin is taken up top for a superplex and a near fall, leaving both of them down. Another Gore is loaded up but Maclin cuts out the leg again in a smart move. Maclin hits his own Gore for the pin to retain at 9:00.

Rating: C+. It was a bit of a slow match but Maclin gets a nice defense under his belt before he has to move on to PCO. Working on the leg was a good enough way to keep the match going and Maclin using the Gore was an even better touch. Maclin might not be the most interesting champion, but he had a perfectly fine title defense here.

Post match Maclin goes after the knee again and takes it out with a chair. Maclin isn’t done though as he wraps the chair around the leg and smashes it with a shovel. That’s FINALLY enough to draw out referees to break it up.

During the break, Rhino was taken out on a stretcher and into an ambulance, with Scott D’Amore there to watch. Maclin pops up and gets in a shouting match with D’Amore, who makes the Under Siege match against PCO No DQ. PCO appeared for the brawl and Maclin ran off.

Here is Joe Hendry for a chat. He was talking to Michael Jordan, who gave him some advice, but Hendry is the expert on wrestling. Hendry is here to hear them say WE BELIEVE and then introduces Dirty Dango.

Dirty Dango vs. Johnny Swinger

Joe Hendry and Zicky Dice are here too. Dango slugs away to start but gets choked on the rope for his efforts. Swinger stops to strut though, allowing Dango to block a stomp to the chest. A Falcon Arrow finishes Swinger at 1:16.

The Design is still mad at Sami Callihan and promises more suffering. The Army Of Violence comes in but Sami is there in disguise and chaos ensues. Much like this horrible story.

Moose isn’t sure what Brian Myers is up to with the Good Hands but doesn’t seem to like the idea. With Moose gone, Myers says he wants the Hands to become a team, so he’ll mold them into champions.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

Knockouts Tag Team Titles: Deonna Purrazzo/Jordynne Grace vs. The Coven

The Coven is defending. Purrazzo and King trade waistlocks to start before Purrazzo’s running hurricanrana takes her down. An armdrag into an armbar has King down and it’s off to Grace for a double hiptoss. An assisted moonsault gets two on King but Grace gets sent into the corner for an elbow to the face.

Grace elbows her way out of trouble but the Grace Driver is blocked. The Vader Bomb connects instead and we take a break with King in trouble. Back with Purrazzo kicking and dodging her way out of the corner, only to get dropped hard onto the apron. The slow beating continues, with Wilde choking in the corner and on the rope. Purrazzo fights out of the front facelock and kicks her way to freedom, allowing the hot tag off to Grace.

House is quickly cleaned until we settle down to Grace jumping over Wilde in the corner. Grace catches her in the corner and hits a MuscleBuster for two, with King making the save. Everything breaks down again and Grace is sent into Purrazzo by mistake, allowing Wilde to get two. With Purrazzo down, a Hart Attack (pump kick instead of clothesline) finishes Grace to retain at 14:29.

Rating: B-. The extra time helped here and the Coven continues to grow into a more respectable team. They already feel like the best team in Impact but given the rather shallow competition, that still leaves them with a lot to cover. For now though, beating two singles stars and keeping the Knockouts Title feud going is a good use of fifteen minutes in the main event.

Post match the Coven goes after Grace but Trinity runs in for the save. A lot of posing ends the show.

Overall Rating: B-. This was the Impact that I like: they had a bunch of stuff they wanted to cover and then did just that. It’s very nice to see them have an efficiently run show like this one which had enough good wrestling to keep me invested and nothing bad to hold it down. Nice work this week, and that is always good to see.

Results
Masha Slamovich b. Killer Kelly – Rollup
Nick Aldis b. Sheldon Jean – King’s Lynn Cloverleaf
Good Hands b. Decay – Samoan drop/middle rope Blockbuster combination to Taurus
Steve Maclin b. Rhino – Gore
Dirty Dango b. Johnny Swinger – Falcon Arrow
The Coven b. Jordynne Grace/Deonna Purrazzo – Pump kick/spinebuster combination to Grace

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – May 4, 2023: Here She Is

Impact Wrestling
Date: May 4, 2023
Location: Cicero Stadium, Cicero, Illinois
Commentators: Tom Hannifan, Matthew Rehwoldt

The road to under Siege continues and we should be in for a fun ride on the way there. With the main event already set up, there are still some spots that need to be filled in and some of those are likely to be covered this week. That should make for an interesting and important show so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

BREAKING NEWS: Trinity (formerly known as Naomi) has signed with Impact Wrestling and will be here with a live mic tonight.

Bhupinder Gujjar/Yuya Uemura vs. Brian Myers/Moose

Gujjar takes over on Myers to start and sends him into the corner. Uemura comes in to take Myers down and a knee drop gets two. It’s off to Moose, who gets knocked outside with Myers being sent into him. Gujjar and Uemura hit stereo dives to the floor to take them both down, followed by a middle rope bulldog to drop Moose back inside.

Moose powers him down and hands it back to Myers. The Roster Cut is countered into a belly to belly though and the double tag brings in Gujjar to plant Moose for two. The Gargoyle Spear misses but so does Moose’s spear. Gujjar hits a Sling Blade for two with Myers making the save. The spear gives Moose the pin on Gujjar at 6:47.

Rating: C+. Moose and Myers are actually turning into a nice heel team and I would not have bet on that being the case. Neither of them have much else to do so putting them together is a fine enough way to go. Gujjar continues to feel like a star in the making and Uemura is as solid of an up and coming hand as they have around here. Nice opener and better than I was expecting.

Steve Maclin/Champagne Singh/Shera are ready for whomever is dumb enough to team with PCO. Singh gives the interviewer money as she leaves (she seems surprised).

Dirty Dango is trying to figure out who attacked Santino Marella (he has a chart with strings attacking pictures, including who looks to be Tony Chimmel, Vladimir Kozlov and Tyler Breeze among several others). Dango summons Joe Hendry, who has a magnifying glass and asks about the hair Dango found at the crime scene last week. Worry not because Dango lost it (the 16 energy drinks in 36 hours might have caused the problem). Dango has a prim suspect though: Mike Tenay. Hendry thinks it might have been Trey Miguel, who doesn’t like Santino. A hug ensues.

Sami Callihan vs. Deaner

The rest of the Design is here with Deaner, who says Sami made a huge mistake by hitting him in the face with the baseball bat (which Sami has here). The fans think Deaner deserved it, which he says is giving Sami a false sense of hope. We’ll change things up instead.

Sami Callihan vs. Kon

The chokeslam plants Callihan and Angels stomps away behind the referee’s back until we get the opening bell. Sami quickly fights back and sends Kon the floor, where Kon trips him down to take back over. Kon runs him over and we take a break. Back with Kon dropping a knee for two and grabbing a bearhug. Callihan fights out and takes over but has to take out Angels. Deaner gets up on the apron with the baseball bat and gives Callihan the thumbs down, allowing the army of violence (the guys in yellow hoodies) to jump Callihan for the DQ at 10:21.

Rating: C-. Yeah I knew this feud wasn’t going to be over yet because I’m not that lucky. I still have no idea what is seen in either the Design of this feud in general but it has been going on for months now with no real end in sight. I’m sure Sami will have to go through all of them one by one before getting to face Deaner in what will be the most thrilling fight ever. Just get away from this stuff already and move on entirely.

Post match Deaner stares at Sami, who calls him a b****. The baseball bat to the face knocks Sami out.

Trey Miguel isn’t happy with being accused of attacking Santino Marella and thinks Dirty Dango had something to do with it. Joe Hendry wants to check Trey’s hair but finds nothing, leaving a confused Miguel to talk away.

Nick Aldis wants the World Title and he’s willing to work to get there. He doesn’t just get handed a title shot around here because the title is more valuable than that. Kenny King comes in to ask if Aldis is on the fast track or the easy train. Aldis thinks King is acting like a gatekeeper so Aldis will knock on that gate on his way to proving a point. King says he isn’t Scott D’Amore but seems interested.

Alisha Edwards vs. Jody Threat

Threat hits her in the face to start and hits some corner clotheslines. Threat misses a charge into the ropes but is right back with a German suplex. The F416 finishes Edwards at 2:56. That’s quite the defeat for someone who was being pushed a bit with Eddie Edwards.

The Motor City Machine Guns are excited that Chris Sabin will be getting an X-Division Title shot at Under Siege. They’ll always be a team but they can be successful on their own as well. Sabin is cool with getting a title shot at Under Siege (Sabin: “Which must be named after my second favorite Steven Segal movie.” Shelly: “What’s your first?” Sabin: “Under Siege II.” Shelley has to cover his face off that one.). With Sabin going after the X-Division Title, Shelly is going to go win the World Title.

We get the second part in the series of sitdown interviews with Frankie Kazarian, who talks about what he did when he left Impact in 2014. He went to Ring Of Honor and had to prove himself again, which was fine with him. Then he went to what would become AEW, but after having some success there as a team, it was time to prove himself back where he started, but on his own. He bet on himself and his future is here. These have been good and this worked too.

Steve Maclin/Champagne Singh/Shera vs. PCO/???/???

PCO is ready to go it alone but here are Heath and Rhino to say they’ll be the partners. Singh tags himself in to save Maclin from having to face PCO, earning a stomping in the corner. Rhino comes in and actually gets punched into the corner, only to chop his way to freedom. It’s off to Heath, who gets sent into the corner by Shera to take over.

Maclin comes in to stomp away but walks into a powerslam. That’s enough for a double tag to bring in PCO to beat up Singh, including a running flip dive through the ropes. Everything breaks down and Rhino Gores Maclin, leaving Heath to Wake Up Call Singh. The PCOsault finishes at 6:57.

Rating: C+. Nice match here and Singh played his role of designated loser rather well. Heath and Rhino are a good choice to put in here as the fans like them and they work well together as a team. Stringing out Maclin vs. PCO is a good idea, as Maclin can be scared of him until the title match and then escape with a win. This was a perfectly fine use of about ten minutes and that’s always nice to see.

The Coven is using magic on Deonna Purrazzo and Jordynne Grace.

The Death Dollz summon James Mitchell, who says the Coven isn’t powerful enough to block their access to the Undead Realm. He’ll fix it but won’t say what it costs. Rosemary, cleaver in hand, gives Jessicka an hourglass, saying they’ll be back before the sand runs out.

Jonathan Gresham vs. Mike Bailey

They shake hands to start but there seems to be some tension. Both catch the other’s kick before Gresham grabs a headscissors on the mat to take over. That’s broken up and they grapple against the ropes as we take a break. Back with Gresham kicking him in the face before snapping off an armdrag on what seems to be a banged up arm.

They go to a test of strength with Gresham getting him to the mat and cranking away on the hands. Bailey’s legs are fine enough to kick away but misses the big one to the head. Bailey goes for the arm as well before hitting the moonsault knees. The rapid fire kicks to the chest rock Gresham to send him outside, setting up the moonsault to the floor.

We take another break and come back again with Bailey kneeing him down for two. Gresham starts back in on the arm but gets kicked in the face for his efforts. They trade forearms until Bailey scores with the tornado kick. The Ultimate Weapon misses and Gresham slaps on the Octopus for the tap at 13:24.

Rating: B. Commentary kept hyping up how good these matches have been and yeah they’re not wrong. There is a chemistry that works here and it is amazing how much better a Bailey match can be when he doesn’t spend half of it not selling a leg injury. Gresham taking him down and getting him into the Octopus for the win worked, though I could go with not seeing these two together again for a bit.

Rich Swann comes up to Sami Callihan in the back, which doesn’t have Sami happy. Sami gets to the point: is Swann going to help him or not?

Steve Maclin complains to Scott D’Amore about Rhino, so he can defend the title against Rhino next week.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

Here is Trinity (formerly Naomi, not the Trinity from the old TNA days) for a debut chat and the fans seem happy to see her. She’s glad to be back and is happy to be in Impact, where she can glow. The reason she chose Impact is the most storied women’s division in wrestling and she wants a piece of it. She’s hear to make an impact and wants the Knockouts Title.

Cue Deonna Purrazzo, who says Trinity invoked her. She knows what it is like to be in a new place, so if Trinity wants a title shot, it isn’t something she can just walk out on. Trinity says facing her will make Purrazzo wish she got fired. Cue Jordynne Grace to say everyone wants to see the two of them fight, but she has the next title shot. Grace and Purrazzo argue but Trinity says she’s waiting on the winner. Trinity leaves them to stare each other down to end the show.

It was a good way to debut, but they treated Trinity like this huge arrival and….she’s just not that big of a star. She’s certainly a name, but this isn’t Becky Lynch showing up. That is one of the good signs for the Knockouts division: it has the depth and history that this isn’t the single most important moment that has ever happened. It’s still a cool moment though, if nothing else because of how she left WWE.

Overall Rating: B-. Another solid show here as they did their thing and started boosting up Under Siege. I’m curious to see where a lot of these stories are going and that makes for a good sign, as things are interesting enough that I want to keep watching. Considering Under Siege is a lower level show, Impact seems to be on something of a roll and the Trinity debut should be a nice boost that will get some extra attention. Good show this week, which is a long running trend.

Results
Moose/Brian Myers b. Bhupinder Gujjar/Yuya Uemura – Spear to Gujjar
Sami Callihan b. Kon via DQ when the Army of Violence interfered
Jody Threat b. Alisha Edwards – F416
PCO/Heath/Rhino b. Steve Maclin/Champagne Singh/Shera – PCOsault to Singh
Jonathan Gresham b. Mike Bailey – Octopus

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – April 27, 2023: This Show Is Darn Nifty

Impact Wrestling
Date: April 27, 2023
Location: Rebel Entertainment Complex, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

The end of last week’s show saw a big announcement as PCO will be getting the first shot at Steve Maclin’s World Title. That alone is going to make for a heck of a showdown at Under Siege, but the card is going to need more than just one match. There are a few options available and we will probably find out some of them tonight so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

Masha Slamovich vs. Jordynne Grace

Grace shoulders her down to start and then does it again, setting up a wristlock. Slamovich tries an armbar but gets powered into the corner, where Grace hits the running Vader Bomb for two. It’s too early for the Grace Driver as Slamovich sends her into the rope for a shot to the throat. Slamovich gets in a shot to the face and rips at said face for a bonus.

There’s a neck snap across the top rope but Grace catches her in the corner and hits a MuscleBuster for two. Slamovich charges into a Michinoku driver for two more before Grace pulls her into a rear naked choke. That’s reversed into Slamovich’s choke, plus a leg trap belly to back suplex for two. They go into a pinfall reversal sequence for a series of ones until Grace stacks her up for the pin at 11:02.

Rating: B-. These two work well together, but it is kind of astounding to see how far Slamovich has fallen. Maybe it is the Russian aspect, but she has gone from what seemed to be the next big thing in the division to just kind of there. While it could still change, I’m not seeing much of a reason to believe that she is going to go further than she is right now. At least not for the time being.

We get a look back at Nick Aldis’ history in Impact, which led to him leading to see if he could be a star without being Magnus. Then he became the NWA World Champion for over 1,000 days and now it is time to see if he can still do it around here.

Joe Hendry has a broke nose. No word on how long he might be out.

Here is Steve Maclin for a chat. Maclin gets to the point: he doesn’t want to wait for Under Siege, so PCO can come out here right now. Cue Champagne Singh and Shera to jump PCO, who fights them both off. Cue Santino Marella and we have a match right now.

PCO vs. Champagne Singh

There are no seconds as PCO sends him to the floor to start. There’s the running flip dive to drop Singh but he’s back with a dropkick and Codebreaker. PCO isn’t happy with Singh bringing out money though and it’s a Backstabber out of the corner. The middle rope flipping splash connects and there’s the DeAnimator to make it worse. A reverse DDT sets up the PCOsault to finish Singh at 5:30.

Rating: C. This was what it needed to be, as PCO ran through someone who shouldn’t give him a problem. PCO has taken out much bigger stars around here and it isn’t like Singh or Shera has any real credibility. Nothing match, but PCO looked good in a pretty dominant win and that’s what they needed to do here.

Flashback Moment of the Week: Magnus b. Christopher Daniels on Impact, February 14, 2013.

The Design is mad at Sami Callihan.

The Coven uses magic to weaken Deonna Purrazzo before Taylor Wilde faces her tonight. They laugh a lot.

Here is Johnny Swinger, with Zicky Dice, to face a luchador that Dice has paid for personally. There’s a language barrier though, so Dice goes to get him.

Johnny Swinger vs. El Dinerico

I have a feeling you know what is going on here. A drop toehold and la majistral finishes Dinerico at 27 seconds.

Post break Swinger and Dice celebrate their win but Santino Marella comes in to say that doesn’t count. Swinger fires Dice, who is so upset he speaks Spanish.

Kenny King won a match on BTI and yelled at commentary.

After mocking the guy he beat, King talked to Sheldon Jean, who has untapped potential. Jean doesn’t seem interested, but King eventually intrigues him.

Design vs. Bullet Club

Non-title and it’s Angels/Kon with Deaner for the Design. Angels slugs away at Bey as commentary thankfully says that a lot of people were expecting Sami Callihan to turn on the team. Bey takes over on Angels so it’s off to Kon, who is quickly kicked in the head. Kon runs them both over though and throws Bey outside in a (possibly ankle injuring) heap. We see Santino Marella down in the back and come back to Kon putting Austin in a nerve hold.

Austin fights out of the corner and avoids a charge, setting up a kick to the face. Bey comes back in with a Code Red to Angels but Kon grabs him, setting up a springboard Russian legsweep (that was cool). With Kon on the floor, the Club take turns diving at him to limited avail. Cue Callihan to go after Deaner, leaving the Club to finally drop Kon with a double dive. Back in and the 1 2 Sweet finishes Angels at 8:26.

Rating: C+. It says a lot about the Bullet Club that they were able to get something decent out of these schmucks. The Design continues to be one of the most worthless acts in wrestling and having Callihan come out there to hurt their leader was almost cathartic in a way. Just get the feud over with so hopefully they can move on to anything else, because this is somehow getting less interesting by the week.

Santino Marella was attacked and is told he needs to take some time off. Dirty Dango resigns as assistant Director of Authority (with Santino reminding him that he never such a thing in the first place) to become DETECTIVE of Authority. Someone has to solve the mystery of who jumped Santino you see.

The Death Dollz don’t have the power to get back to the Undead Realm without the Knockouts Tag Team Titles. Crazzy Steve comes in and, after being amazed by how excited Jessicka is about meeting him, suggests that they talk to James Mitchell. Rosemary doesn’t like it but agrees.

Jody Threat vs. Seleziya Sparx

Jody drives her into the corner to start and grabs the wristlock to keep things on the mat. Back up and Threat gets sent to the apron, only to come back with a top rope seated senton. Some corner clotheslines set up a release German suplex, followed by the F416 to finish Sparx at 4:21.

Rating: C. I still do not get the appeal of Threat, who has yet to show me much of anything in her time around here. She’s not bad or having terrible matches, but rather just coming and going without making any real impression. Then again, I do like the idea of putting in some fresh names so points for at least trying something.

Killer Kelly really liked Hardcore War and wants more violence.

We get the first in a series of sitdown interviews with Frankie Kazarian. He got his break in Impact in 2003 and became a star in the X-Division. It was the tale end of the wild west of wrestling though and he didn’t want to become one of the good old boys who clutched to their spot. Then he left in 2014 after doing all kinds of things here, but management was such a mess (we get a clip of Dixie Carter clutching to Hulk Hogan’s leg, begging him to stay) that he decided to walk away. More next week after a more interesting first part than I was expecting.

Here’s what’s coming on future shows.

Knockouts Title: Taylor Wilde vs. Deonna Purrazzo

Wilde, with KiLynn King, is challenging. They circle each other for a bit to start before Wilde takes out the leg to put them both on the mat. Purrazzo reverses into an armbar but it gets broken up for an early standoff. An armdrag into an armbar has Wilde in more trouble but King offers a distraction for the break. Wilde gets in a cheap shot from behind but takes too long posing, allowing Purrazzo to try for the Fujiwara armbar. With that not working, Wilde consults her cards and we take a break.

Back with Wilde being sent outside, allowing Purrazzo to deck King. That lets Wilde get in another shot to take over, with King even getting in the neck snap of retribution. Wilde steps on the hair and pulls up like a good villain, only to be knocked into the corner. They collide in the middle for a double knockdown and they get a breather. Wilde grabs a German suplex but gets pulled into the Fujiwara armbar for the tap at 12:56.

Rating: B-. Another nice back and forth match here as Purrazzo dispatches an early challenger for the title. Wilde taking the loss doesn’t hurt her title reign with King and it was a pretty competitive match. You can probably pencil in King for a title shot of her own and I’ve heard worse ideas for everyone involved.

Post match the beatdown is on but Jordynne Grace makes the save to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. People who needed to win did so and aside from the Design, there was nothing that felt like a waste of time. In other words, it’s more of the same solid stuff from Impact that we’ve been seeing for months now. What matters is setting up Under Siege and you can see some of those matches coming from here. They still have time to set it up and odds are we’ll be seeing something more next week. For now, it’s a show that did enough good to make me want to see what happens next.

Results
Jordynne Grace b. Masha Slamovich – Rollup
PCO b. Champagne Singh – PCOsault
Johnny Swinger b. El Dinerico – La majistral
Bullet Club b. The Design – 1 2 Sweet to Angels
Jody Threat b. Seleziya Sparx – F416
Deonna Purrazzo b. Taylor Wilde – Fujiwara armbar

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Impact Wrestling – April 20, 2023: Dang This Stuff Works

Impact Wrestling
Date: April 20, 2023
Location: Rebel Entertainment Complex, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

We are done with Rebellion and the biggest story is the new World Champion, having defeated Kushida to win the vacant title. At the same time, Deonna Purrazzo is once again Knockouts Champion, having defeated Jordynne Grace for the vacant title in the show’s main event. Let’s get to it.

Here is Rebellion if you need a recap.

We look at the new champions being crowned at Rebellion.

Mike Bailey/Jonathan Gresham/Trey Miguel vs. Time Machine

Gresham and Shelley go technical to start for a standoff so it’s off to Bailey vs. Sabin. An armbar has Bailey in trouble as commentary points out that everyone but Miguel lost at Rebellion. Kushida comes in and gets sent into the corner, where Miguel rakes his back. That doesn’t last long as Kushida gets over to his own corner, allowing all of Time Machine to crank on Miguel’s arm.

It’s off to Bailey, who gets caught in the Tree of Woe for a triple dropkick as the dominance continues. Shelley starts in on Bailey’s arm before it’s back to Kushida, who kicks Gresham and Miguel off the apron in a smart move. Everything breaks down and Sabin hits a suicide dive onto Gresham and Miguel as we take a break.

Back with Bailey’s arm still in trouble but he kicks his way to freedom. Gresham comes in and gets to face Kushida with Gresham getting a series of near falls. Sabin accidentally kicks Shelley in the chest though and it’s Miguel getting to clean house. Bailey busts out the slingshot springboard moonsault onto the pile on the floor but Kushida Hoverboard Locks Miguel. Time Machine all get submission holds on at once and we take another break.

Back again with Miguel knocking Kushida into the corner. That doesn’t last long as it’s back to Sabin, who gets to slug it out with Shelley. Bailey kicks him down and this the moonsault double knees to the chest. Sabin is back up with a German superplex and Shelley/Kushida break up the tag attempts. Bailey manages the Ultimate Weapon to a standing Sabin’s back as everything breaks down. The parade of strikes to the face leads to Kushida kicking Miguel in the face, setting up Cradle Shock for the pin at 26:35.

Rating: B. Like this wasn’t going to work. They had all six guys getting time and Bailey getting beaten up. What else could you want in a match? The ending even sets up Sabin (though Kushida and Shelley could be right there too) as Miguel’s next challenger, which boosts up the competition a good bit. Very solid opener here as they let six talented people have a long, long TV match and it worked.

Santino Marella is happy with his in-ring return but says he won’t be returning to the ring very often. Alisha Edwards interrupts to to yell about PCO but Santino sends her to the ring for her match. Gia Miller: “Did she have a match tonight?” Santino: “She does now.” Johnny Swinger and Zicky Dice come in to ask about Swinger’s match but Santino says he can’t keep wasting resources on a loser. Dice has found the world’s greatest luchador though, and he’ll even pay for said luchador’s appearance and transportation. Even Santino is down with that.

Video on Deonna Purrazzo, the new Knockouts Champion.

Alisha Edwards vs. Tara Rysing

Alisha takes Tara into the corner to start and sends her flying without much effort. Tara manages a clothesline out of the corner but gets sent outside. Back in and an X Factor finishes Rysing at 2:27.

Post match Edwards stays on Tara but Jody Threat makes the save.

Post break Threat promises to take care of Edwards for Rysing.

Moose vs. Yuya Uemura

Brian Myers and Bhupinder Gujjar are here too. Moose takes him straight into the corner to start but gets pulled into an armbar. With Moose on the floor, Uemura loads up a dive but Myers takes the impact for him. That earns Uemura an apron bomb and Moose shoves him around back inside. Uemura fights up but Myers offers a distraction, allowing Moose to knock him back down.

Back in and Uemura hits a dropkick, followed by a middle rope bulldog for two. Moose suplexes his way out of a suplex but gets caught in a German suplex. Uemura’s high crossbody is broken up so Moose goes up, only to get belly to back superplexed down. Now the high crossbody can connect but Myers offers the distraction. Gujjar goes after him but Moose sends Umeura throat first into the top rope. The spear finishes Uemura at 9:57.

Rating: C+. Power vs. speed with interference mixed in worked well enough here and Uemura is feeling more and more like a player every week. He’s no longer just the guy on excursion but rather someone who might be something around here. Granted that isn’t going to have the longest future, but for now I can settle for a young, talented star giving Moose a nice match.

Nick Aldis is happy to be back and tells us some of his history around here. He’s coming for Steve Maclin and the World Title because he knows what it’s like to be under that pressure. As soon as Maclin’s strong legs start to wobble, Aldis will be right there to take the title from him. As usual, Aldis cuts a good promo, but he’s only so interesting.

Frankie Kazarian vs. Good Hands

Kazarian slugs away to start but gets caught in the wrong corner rather quickly. A dropkick puts both Hands down at once but Skyler low bridges Kazarian to the floor. Back in and Kazarian takes over without much trouble, setting up a Figure Four and small package for two at the same time. The slingshot cutter hits Hotch and the chickenwing finishes Skyler at 3:40.

Rating: C. Just a showcase for Kazarian here, which wasn’t the most thrilling stuff but it wasn’t supposed to be. Kazarian getting a push is a fine way to go as he would be a good choice for a one off World Title shot at Maclin. You aren’t likely to get anything worse than pretty good out of him so warming him up like this could be a rather smart move.

The Coven is coming for Deonna Purrazzo.

Sami Callihan talks about how smart he is and claims to have infiltrated the Design to take them down from within. Was that really supposed to be a surprise?

Digital Media Title: Joe Hendry vs. Sheldon Jean

Hendry is defending and brings up Jean being on Big Brother Canada but having his season cut off by the Coronavirus pandemic. Jean shrugs off an early beatdown and hammers Hendry down on the mat for a bit of a surprise. That’s enough for Hendry, who fights up with some clotheslines. The fall away slam sets up…actually a strike off until Jean gets dropped. The Standing Ovation retains the title at 4:33.

Rating: C. This was a little longer than I expected and Jean got in a nice bit of offense so it might have been a tryout for him. Hendry got to break the smallest bit of a sweat to retain, but the real perk here was the energy that he brings. The motivational stuff is great and I could see Hendry going pretty far around here, as the fans are into him and that’s what matters a lot of the time.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

It’s time for new World Champion Steve Maclin’s Changing Of The Guard ceremony. Maclin walks to the ring under military guard and talks about having to learn who he was when he came back. Now he’s the World Champion and issues the open challenge to any Canadian. Cue Scott D’Amore to say he’s not happy with Maclin being the champion but he earned it. Why did Maclin take so long to go after Josh Alexander during his record title reign?

Maclin laughs him off because he was hoping the old D’Amore would show up. D’Amore says Maclin hit him like a coward and the jacket comes off. If Maclin wants to face a Canadian at Under Siege, he can face the perfect Canadian: Perfect Creation One, PCO! Cue PCO to beat up the guards, with Maclin bailing. Some guards are put through a table to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. I’m running out of ways to say it but Impact continues to be a completely watchable wrestling show every week. You can follow the stories really easily and it isn’t hard to jump into a lot of this stuff. They were at a new starting point with a lot of the stories this week, but there is enough to have more going on next week. Good show here, with a rather nice opener and a surprise first challenger for Maclin makes it even better.

Results
Time Machine b. Trey Miguel/Jonathan Gresham/Mike Bailey – Cradle Shock to Miguel
Alisha Edwards b. Tara Rysing – Facebuster
Moose b. Yuya Uemura – Spear
Frankie Kazarian b. Good Hands – Chickenwing to Skyler
Joe Hendry b. Sheldon Jean – Standing Ovation

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – April 13, 2023: Worth Filing Out For

Impact Wrestling
Date: April 13, 2023
Location: St. Clair College, Windsor, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Tom Hannifan, Matthew Rehwoldt

The road to Rebellion end this week and that means it is time to finish off the build towards the show. In this case it means we are going to be seeing more build towards the new World Title match of Kushida vs. Steve Maclin. This week will also see what happens with Mickie James and the Knockouts Title. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

Kenny King vs. Frankie Kazarian

The winner gets the advantage in the Hardcore War at Rebellion and the other teams are at ringside. They fight over a lockup to start until Kazarian snaps off some chops. King cuts him off though and starts hammering away in the corner to take over. A backbreaker gives King two and we hit the one armed camel clutch. Kazarian breaks it up and makes the clothesline comeback, capped off by a running forearm.

The springboard spinning legdrop gives Kazarian two but King is back with a tiger driver for the same. King sends him to the floor but Kazarian comes back in with a slingshot cutter for two. The brawl on the floor finally breaks out as Kazarian gets the chickenwing. Cue Brian Myers for a distraction, allowing Moose to spear Kazarian down for the pin at 8:18.

Rating: B-. These two were having a good match until the screwy ending, which was quite the twist as Myers and Moose haven’t had anything to do with this feud so far. They would be an upgrade over the Good Hands for the match but that might be asking too much. For now though, I’ll settle for talented wrestlers having a good match to open the show, as is the norm around here.

Post match the beatdown is on and Team Dreamer is left laying.

Earlier tonight, Steve Maclin interrupted the Canadian National Anthem. Kushida made the save and cleaned house in a brawl.

Lince Dorado vs. Black Taurus vs. Laredo Kid vs. Rich Swann

Crazzy Steve handles Taurus’ intro. Taurus sends everyone to the floor to start and hits the big dive, only to have a triple superkick send him to the floor. That means the dives can take him out and leave everyone down as we take a break. Back with Taurus launching Dorado onto the top, where he can superplex Kid (while on top of Taurus’ shoulders for a crazy visual).

Back up and Kid hits a springboard armdrag to Swann, followed by a double Golden Rewind from Dorado. Taurus is back in to clean house, including a heck of a pop up Samoan drop to Dorado. That’s not enough as Taurus powerbombs Kid onto Swann at ringside. Taurus cleans house and goes up, only to have Kid catch him with a super Spanish Fly for the pin at 10:44.

Rating: B-. This might not have broken the mold for a match like this but they did their thing well. Kid has felt like he should be the next breakout star in the division almost every time he is around but nothing has ever really clicked. It seems like they’re trying it again and pinning Taurus is certainly a good way to start. Taurus got to show off again here and that power is always worth a look. Fun match, as expected.

Long video on the Bullet Club vs. the Motor City Machine Guns in Ultimate X for the Tag Team Titles.

Jessicka and Rosemary want to go to the Undead Realm to get Taya Valkyrie back but Rosemary says she’s going alone because Jessicka doesn’t know how to do it. She opens the coffin….but it’s just a regular one instead of the portal. The Coven must be behind this!

Jessicka vs. Taylor Wilde

Rosemary and KiLynn King are here too. Hold on as Wilde gives Jessicka a tarot card to start so Jessicka shows it to Rosemary. That lets Wilde jump her from behind so Jessicka says STOP HITTING ME. Jessicka misses a charge and gets choked in the corner before a Backstabber brings Jessicka down again. Back up and some jabs stagger Wilde, setting up a running crossbody for two. Rosemary and King get into it, allowing Wilde to slip out of a Sick Driver and grab a fisherman’s neckbreaker for the pin at 4:28.

Rating: C. The more I see of Wilde, the more amazed I am by the fact that she is the same woman who came back to almost no reaction last year. This is a completely different way to go for her and it is working rather well. The Coven has been a nice breath of air for the division and I could go for them holding the titles that much longer.

Jordynne Grace is ready for the Knockouts Title match at Rebellion but she can’t control what happens with Mickie James. She can control winning though.

Alisha Edwards is glad to have brought Eddie Edwards back to the right path. Now they want to get rid of the monster blocking his path.

Dirty Dango/Joe Hendry vs. Angels/Callihan

Before the match, Hendry confirms our belief in him. The rest of the Design is here too because what would it be like without the rest of them. Callihan suplexes Hendry for a fast two so Angels comes in, only to get suplexed as well. Dango comes in for the Dirtbag Shuffle but Angels takes him down. Callihan is whipped into Angels though and it’s back to Dango to clean house. Kon grabs the leg though and it’s a standing Sliced Bread to drop Hendry. A frog splash gets two, with Hendry making the save. Callihan hits Angels by mistake so Deaner stops to yell, leaving Hendry to hit the Standing Ovation for the pin at 4:39.

Rating: C. Egads I don’t know how much more I can take of this story. It feels like it has been going on forever and the Design somehow gets lamer every single week. Just get to someone turning on someone so they can have their big violent match and we can move on. Dango continues to do fine in his role and it’s nice to see him getting away from the dancing stuff. Hendry continues to be awesome and that’s all he needs to be.

Post match the Design jumps them again, until Santino Marella comes out for the save. This includes the Cobra because….oh my head hurts again.

Video on Steve Maclin vs. Kushida.

PCO promises to bury Eddie Edwards in a Last Rites match at Rebellion.

Bully Ray introduces Moose and Brian Myers as new members of his now seven person army. They’re ready for Rebellion and promise destruction because they’re family. Keep in mind that this is all to destroy TOMMY DREAMER.

Gisele Shaw vs. Tasha Steelz

Jai Vidal and Savannah Evans are here with Shaw. Steelz scares her to the floor to start before Steelz slaps her in the face back inside. That sends Shaw back to the floor and we take a break. Back with Shaw slapping her in the face as the theme continues. Steelz chops away but Shawn knocks her outside, where Evans hits a chokeslam onto the apron.

A snap suplex gives Shaw two more and we hit the reverse chinlock. With that broken up, Shaw hits a double jumping stomp in the corner and we take another break. Back again with Shaw hitting a running jumping uppercut for two more, followed by a swinging suplex for the same.

Steelz fights up and hits an ax handle into an atomic drop into a…completely missed jumping neckbreaker. Shaw’s belly to back toss sets up a running shot to the back of the head for two. The annoyed Shaw stomps away in the corner before they head outside for a slugout. Steelz sends her into the steps but misses a running knee, which only hits said steps. Back in and Steelz kicks the knee out for the pin at 21:23.

Rating: C+. Something tells me we didn’t miss much between those breaks as I have a hard time believing that these two had a pay per view main event length match out of nowhere. It wouldn’t surprise me if this had to be extended due to the Mickie James injury and if that is the case, they did rather well in an area they probably haven’t been in before.

Mickie James tells Santino Marella that the doctor has given her a diagnosis of her rib injury.

The fans leave the arena for Mickie’s announcement. I’m assuming this is to avoid the announcement getting out, but it comes off like some tragedy.

Rebellion rundown. Apparently Brian Myers and Moose are taking the Good Hands’ spots on Team Bully. At least they don’t have to find two more people for Team Dreamer.

Video on Mickie James’ Last Rodeo and path to winning the Knockouts Title again, plus Jordynne Grace and Deonna Purrazzo waiting for their shots.

Here is Mickie for her big announcement. When she started the Last Rodeo, she wanted to show that she still had it and that is what she did. At some point, every champion has to lose and she can handle some of that, but she can’t fight age. There is a difference between her and most of the division, but she feels like she is 20.

The fact that she isn’t makes this even worse and she thanks everyone for this Last Rodeo. She just got off the phone with the doctor though and she isn’t cleared to compete at Rebellion. She is a woman of her word and it is Deonna and Jordynne’s (watching in the back) time now. Mickie leaves the title, and her hat, in the ring and leaves. Grace leaves and Deonna looks on to end the show. This felt a lot like a retirement speech, but retiring over a broken bone feels like quite the stretch. James should be back and probably will, as ending a legendary career over something that will heal in a month or two is nuts.

Overall Rating: B-. The Mickie angle at the end was actually emotional and felt like a huge deal, which should set up the Knockouts Title match that much better. Other than that, the card for Rebellion was already mostly set coming into this show so there only so much that needed to be done. This show did well enough with the little that it had to cover, so nice job on hammering things down on the go home show.

Results
Kenny King b. Frankie Kazarian – Spear from Moose
Laredo Kid b. Black Taurus, Lince Dorado and Rich Swann – Super Spanish Fly to Taurus
Taylor Wilde b. Jessicka – Fisherman’s neckbreaker
Dirty Dango/Joe Hendry b. Callihan/Angels – Standing Ovation to Angels
Tasha Steelz b. Gisele Shaw – Kick to the knee

 

 

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Impact Wrestling/New Japan Multiverse United: By Their Powers Combined

Multiverse United
Date: March 30, 2023
Location: Globe Theater, Los Angeles, California
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan, Ian Riccaboni

This is a special show as we have New Japan vs. Impact Wrestling, quite a bit of which will be built around title matches. The card is pretty stacked but injuries to Josh Alexander and Mickie James are going to slow things down a bit. I’m curious to see where some of these matches go and that is a great feeling. Let’s get to it.

Pre-show: Yuya Uemura vs. Gabriel Kidd

They fight over a lockup to start with Kidd grabbing a headlock. Uemura can’t get away until Kidd flips him into the ropes for the break. Back up and they fight over wrist control until Uemura pulls him into an armbar. That’s broken up too and Kidd shoves him off the top for a crash. Kidd strikes away for two but Uemura bulldogs his way out of trouble. Uemura starts in on the arm until a choke slows him way down. That earns Kidd a shot to the face though, setting up a high crossbody to give Uemura the pin at 7:53.

Rating: C. Not much to see here but this was just a way to get some wrestling in the ring to wake the fans up. It was short and to the point with two guys that have just enough notoriety to have a bit of interest. Uemura has a bigger name though and seems a bit more polished, which is why you’ll probably be hearing more from him sooner.

The opening video talks about how the companies are coming together and only the strong survive.

X-Division Title: Rich Swann vs. Kevin Knight vs. Frankie Kazarian vs. Clark Connors vs. Rocky Romero vs. Trey Miguel

Miguel is defending and this is one fall to a finish. Everyone goes after Miguel to start and we get a six way headlock because scramble. A bunch of armdrags ensue and everyone tries a dropkick at the same time. Miguel snaps off some armdrags but gets quadruple dropkicked out to the floor. Swann and Knight clear the ring with Swann taking him down as well.

Now it’s Kazarian coming in to take over until Knight dropkicks him out of the air for two. Miguel manages to Tower Of Doom everyone but Swann, who comes in with a top rope splash to Miguel for a bonus. Romero is back up with the Forever Lariats until Connors spears a bunch of people. A middle rope spear knocks Knight out of the air but Miguel steals the pin at 7:12.

Rating: C+. This was all about getting a bunch of people in there at once, allowing them to do their thing in fast forward. Miguel stealing the pin fits him well and it isn’t exactly shocking to have him get beaten up after his heel stuff has gone so well. Connors got to show off a bit here and it wouldn’t surprise me to see him become a thing down the line.

Commentary runs down the card.

Eddie Edwards/Tom Lawlor/JR Kratos/Joe Hendry vs. PCO/Fred Rosser/Sami Callihan/Alex Coughlin

Before the match, Hendry says it doesn’t matter which language we speak, because WE BELIEVE. Edwards and PCO slug it out to start before it’s off to Lawlor vs. Rosser (a long feud in New Japan Strong). With Lawlor down, Hendry comes in and gets pounded down. Hendry and Coughlin fight over a suplex before Kratos comes in for the strike off.

Coughlin manages a suplex so PCO comes in to chop away at Kratos. Everything breaks down in a hurry until Callihan is left alone to clothesline Lawlor. PCO’s dive is cut off by Kratos, who hits his own dive. That leaves PCO to hit the big dive off the top onto everyone else at once.

Back in and PCO clotheslines Hendry before Rosser drives Edwards into the corner. A northern lights suplex sets up a chickenwing but Lawlor makes the save. We hit the parade of finishers until PCO is left alone with Kratos. They slug it out until a reverse DDT and PCOsault finishes Kratos at 12:27.

Rating: C+. Much like the opener, this was about getting as many people on the show as they could at once with some feuds mixed together in the middle. PCO as the unstoppable monster makes all the sense in the world, though Rosser got a very nice showcase here too. I’ll be surprised if he doesn’t get a chance to show up on a bigger stage soon.

We recap Moose vs. Jeff Cobb. They’re both big and strong so it’s hoss fight time.

Moose vs. Jeff Cobb

The much taller Moose can’t get anywhere with a headlock but Cobb’s shoulders don’t do much either. Moose shoves him away for a bit and they take turns chopping away in the corner. Cobb takes over and stands on Moose’s back to mock the Moose pose. Moose knocks him into the corner for a hesitation dropkick and the corner chokebomb gets two.

That’s fine with Cobb, who catches him with an apron superplex for a double knockdown. The slugout sets up a double clothesline into a double nipup before they knock each other to the floor. Back in and Moose catches him on top and jumps up for the superplex. The spear misses so Moose jumps up to the top for a high crossbody. Cobb shrugs that off though and muscles him up for the Tour of the Islands and the pin at 11:52.

Rating: B-. Sometimes you need two big guys to beat on each other for a little while until one of them can’t get up. This was exactly what you got here and Moose putting Cobb over is a bit surprising. Cobb is a heck of a monster and it was cool to see him throwing Moose around. Fun match here and it was exactly what was advertised as being.

Deonna Purrazzo vs. Masha Slamovich vs. Gisele Shaw vs. Miyu Yamashita

The winner is in the Knockouts Title match at Rebellion with Mickie James, on commentary, possibly being in as well if her ribs heals in time. They stare at each other to start with Shaw bailing out to the floor. Slamovich goes out with her so it’s down to Purrazzo vs. Miyu. The big kick doesn’t work for Miyu but Shaw pulls Purrazzo to the floor.

Back in and Shaw loses a strike off with Miyu and Slamovich is there for a dive. Shawn dives onto them as well (Mickie: “I legit screamed, I am so sorry.”) but Slamovich runs her over inside. Miyu is back in to run people over and slug it out with Purrazzo. Everyone is down and goes to a corner before coming out for a pair of slugouts.

Purrazzo’s Fujiwara armbar is broken up and Slamovich hits a middle rope Canadian Destroyer to plant Shaw. Purrazzo rolls some German suplexes on Slamovich but the Queen’s Gambit is countered into the Skull Kick. Shaw makes a save but the Queen’s Gambit gives Purrazzo a title shot at Rebellion.

Rating: B-. This was another match with everyone working well together and Purrazzo, by far the most accomplished regular around here, getting the win. Miyu didn’t get to do much in here but Slamovich had the power and Shaw held her own, making for a nice combination here. Now can we please have some more singles matches instead of a bunch of people in the ring at once?

The Bullet Club (Ace Austin/Chris Bey) say they have lost a few matches, but they’re a different team now.

Tag Team Titles: TMDK vs. Motor City Machine Guns vs. Aussie Open vs. Chris Bey/Ace Austin

Austin and Bey (of the Bullet Club) are defending, this is one fall to a finish and the Guns’ Strong Tag Team Titles aren’t on the line. Haste (of TMDK, along with Bad Dude Tito) starts things off with Alex Shelley. The Guns and TMDK all come in and everything breaks down in a hurry. Back in and Haste has to slip out of Skull & Bones and it’s Tito stomping on Shelley.

Haste comes back in and kicks/dances before handing it back to Tito for the missed top rope splash. Bey gets the tag and Code Reds Haste for two, only to get chopped down by the Aussies. A suplex drops Bey but he ducks the Aussies’ double clothesline, allowing the tag off to Austin.

Sabin comes back in to start striking away at Fletcher and we hit the parade of dives to the floor. Back in and Davis saves Fletcher, setting up an assisted standing Iconoclasm for two. Coriolis is broken up and the Dream Sequence hits Fletcher. Tito plants Bey for two but the Club is back up with 1-2-Sweet to Haste to retain at 13:26.

Rating: B-. The Club gets to retain to prove that they are a different team than they were when they first got together. They are a great example of a team who was put together and then made something of it so well done all around. The Guns are the Guns and the Aussies will have their day, but Tito and Haste showed themselves well here and should have a nice future as well.

Mick Foley wants you to come to Dresselmania III (a charity dress/story show).

Kushida vs. Lio Rush

Rush is replacing an injured Josh Alexander. Kushida goes to the mat and Rush bails into the corner before doing his running and dodging. The handspring kick to the head sends Rush outside and a dropkick through the ropes hits him again. Kushida follows and gets caught in a hurricanrana but a kick to Rush’s arm cuts him off again back inside. Said arm is snapped around the bottom rope and cranked on in various ways, setting up a weird standing hammerlock.

Rush manages to send him outside though and that means a suicide dive. Back in and the Final Hour misses, meaning it’s a double strike to put both of them down. They get up and Rush has to power out of the Hoverboard Lock before kicking Kushida’s head off. A poisonrana into the springboard Stunner gets two on Kushida, who is right back for the Hoverboard Lock for the tap at 12:43.

Rating: B. Kushida has long been my favorite New Japan star and he was able to work well with Rush here. Rush may not have the best attitude and there will often be drama with everything he does but he can move around the ring like almost no one else. Heck of a match here as Kushida kept slowing him down and reeled him in until he got the tap.

We recap Kenta defending the Strong Openweight Title against Minoru Suzuki. Kenta lost to him in the New Japan Cup and Suzuki wants revenge for being disrespected a few years ago.

Strong Openweight Title: Kenta vs. Minoru Suzuki

Kenta is defending and you can lose the title by DQ (as is normally the rule for the title). Feeling out process to start with Kenta bailing into the ropes. Some kicks stagger Kenta and Suzuki gets in a leg choke on the ropes. They brawl on the floor with Suzuki getting posted a few times and kicked up against the barricade.

Kenta gets the better of things and takes it back inside for the strike off. Suzuki gets knocked down and we hit the chinlock. The comeback earns Suzuki some kicks to the chest but Suzuki starts going after the ankle. Kenta cuts that off with a DDT and they forearm it out again.

They kick it out with Kenta getting the better of things, setting up the hesitation dropkick in the corner. The top rope double stomp gets two on Suzuki but the GTS is countered into a sleeper. With that broken up and nothing else working, Kenta shoves the referee down, goes low, and grabs a rollup with feet on the ropes for the pin to retain the title at 15:27.

Rating: B-. They beat on each other for a good while here but the ending didn’t exactly click. It felt like they were told to go home out of nowhere and did the most basic, quick ending that they could. Kenta is a great weasel heel though and it was nice to see Suzuki hit him, but Kenta keeping the title makes more sense.

Post match Suzuki has to be kept away from Kenta again.

We recap the main event, with Mike Bailey challenging Hiroshi Tanahashi because Tanahashi is still the best.

Hiroshi Tanahashi vs. Mike Bailey

They shake hands to start and Tanahashi backs him into the corner for a shot to the ribs. That lets Tanahashi get in the air guitar but Bailey is back up with the bouncing kicks. Tanahashi goes after the knee (I think this might be a waste of time) with a chop block and some kicks to said knee in the corner.

Bailey is fine enough to knock him away and hit a missile dropkick, setting up the running shooting star press for two. Tanahashi is back with a knockdown and a flipping splash for two of his own. A dragon screw legwhip over the ropes slows Bailey down a bit so Tanahashi does it again.

Bailey avoids a charge and hits an Asai moonsault (oh here we go) to knock them both down. They barely beat the count back in and Bailey hits the moonsault knees to the chest. The tornado kick is countered with the Sling Blade but Bailey hits some kicks (including his spinning kick in the corner). The Ultimate Weapon only hits mat so Tanahashi grabs some Twist And Shouts. The High Fly Flow finishes Bailey at 15:17.

Rating: B-. I am completely over Bailey and his horrible lack of selling. It’s like someone working over his knee makes him want to sell less and less each time and it gets very annoying. What’s the point of Tanahashi doing one of his signature moves if Bailey is going to just pop up, do his big flip or kick and the go “ow my leg” after he got in his spot? Anyway, Tanahashi looked very good here and Bailey continues to be annoying.

Respect is shown to end the show.

Overall Rating: B+. There’s nothing close to bad on here and the matches all worked well. While I could have gone with fewer multi-person matches and had some more regular one on ones, it’s hard to argue with a show featuring that much good stuff up and down. Nothing blew the roof off, but I will absolutely take a show where almost everything was above average by a pretty nice margin.

Results
Yuya Uemura b. Gabriel Kidd – High crossbody
Trey Miguel b. Rich Swann, Kevin Knight, Frankie Kazarian, Clark Connors and Rocky Romero – Spear to Knight
PCO/Fred Rosser/Sami Callihan/Alex Coughlin b. Eddie Edwards/Tom Lawlor/JR Kratos/Joe Hendry – PCOsault to Kratos
Deonna Purrazzo b. Masha Slamovich, Miyu Yamashita and Gisele Shaw – Queen’s Gambit to Shaw
Chris Bey/Ace Austin b. TMDK, Motor City Machine Guns and Aussie Open – 1-2-Sweet to Haste
Kushida b. Lio Rush – Hoverboard Lock
Kenta b. Minoru Suzuki – Rollup with feet on the ropes
Hiroshi Tanahashi b. Mike Bailey – High Fly Flow

 

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Impact Wrestling – March 23, 2023: Leave The Memories Alone

Impact Wrestling
Date: March 23, 2023
Location: Sam’s Town Live, Las Vegas, Nevada
Commentators: Tom Hannifan, Matthew Rehwoldt

It is the night before Sacrifice and we are eight days away from Multiverse United. That means it is time to build up both shows at the last minute, as there is still some work that needs to be done. The good thing is that both shows already have quite a bit set and now the final touches can be applied. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening recap looks at Steve Maclin vs. Josh Alexander, including Maclin costing Alexander/Rich Swann/Frankie Kazarian a six man tag last week.

Opening sequence.

The Design vs. Time Machine

Callihan is here with the Design. Kushida squares up to Kon to start but Sabin comes in as well, allowing Kon to clothesline both of them down. Deaner comes in and gets struck down by the Guns, only to take Sabin into the wrong corner. It’s off to Angels to trade chops with Sabin before a leg lariat puts Sabin down. Sabin ties Angels up though and Kushida/Shelley kick Angels’ arms out to take over.

There’s a running hesitation dropkick in the corner to hit Angels again and Shelley stays on the bad arm. Kushida snaps the arm across the top and it’s off to a double arm crank. Sabin comes back in but gets taken into the wrong corner so Angels can choke a bit. A sunset flip gets two on Deaner and Sabin dives over to Kushida for the tag. House is quickly cleaned and everything breaks down, with Kushida and Shelley taking over on Deaner’s arm for a change.

The handspring kick knocks Kon off the apron and Kushida hits a big dive to the floor to take out a variety of people. We take a break and come back with Angels (favoring his arm) and Kushida trading their forearms. Deaner kicks Kushida in the head and Kon’s spinebuster sets up Angel’s frog splash for two. A double clothesline Doomsday Device gets two on Kushida as Shelley makes the save.

Everything breaks down again and Angels is left alone, setting up a triple Dream Sequence. A triple kick in the head looks to set up Skull And Bones but Deaner makes the save. Hold on though as Callihan gets in to protect Deaner, leaving Callihan to get taken down as well. Angel’s dive is loaded up but he gets pulled into the Hoverboard Lock. Sabin kicks the arm away from the ropes and Angels taps at 18:50.

Rating: C+. Well that was….long. I’m not sure why anyone thinks there is a need for a Design match to go nearly twenty minutes but thankfully Time Machine was there to balance things out a bit. The action was fine but I can’t understand what is supposed to be interesting about the Design. It would be great to finally get to whatever they’re setting up with Callihan, because there has been almost nothing interesting so far and I have no reason to believe that is going to change.

The Coven is happy to be the new Knockouts Tag Team Champions and like magic.

Raj Singh and Shera are rich and like it in Las Vegas. The former is so rich that he’s now Champagne Singh as we just keep up the stereotypes.

Eddie Edwards is in the back with Kenny King and talks about how he has to get rid of PCO. That’s why he has brought in help, with King talking about how they realized they needed each other at Jay Briscoe’s mama’s house. PCO was never family like them, so King is going to take PCO out at Sacrifice.

Savannah Evans vs. Deonna Purrazzo

Gisele Shaw and Jai Vidal are here with Evans. Purrazzo slugs away to start but gets shoved down without much effort. There’s a running splash to crush Purrazzo in the corner and Evans throws her right back out. Purrazzo manages to snap off a running hurricanrana though and Evans crashes out to the floor. The baseball slide drops Evans again but a Shaw distraction lets Evans send Purrazzo into various things.

We take a break and come back with Purrazzo still in trouble as Shaw is rather pleased. A running shoulder in the corner sets up a butterfly suplex as Purrazzo is getting crushed here. The chinlock goes on as Shaw’s slapping the mat over and over again sounds like someone knocking on a door.

Purrazzo fights up and gets a boot up in the corner before going after the arm. That doesn’t work so Purrazzo hits a running knee into a Russian legsweep. Now the Fujiwara armbar can go on, with Evans making it over to the rope. Back up and Evans snaps off a suplex but gets kicked in the head. Evans is sent to the apron but the distractions are on. Evans accidentally kicks Vidal down and Purrazzo gets rid of Shaw, setting up a crucifix to pin Evans at 13:51.

Rating: C. This was another long match and mostly a squash until Purrazzo beat up two people at once to beat Evans. Purrazzo is geared up for her match with Shaw at Sacrifice and now we should be in for a showdown tomorrow night. Evans continues to look like a monster for most of her matches but then comes up short in the end, which could go somewhere in the future.

Post match Evans lays Purrazzo out and Shaw helps out with the beating. This goes on for a bit and no one saves Purrazzo.

Flashback Moment Of The Week (They still do these?): The Motor City Machine Guns b. Team 3D and Beer Money at Sacrifice 2010.

The Death Dollz are mad at losing the Knockouts Tag Team Titles with Taya Valkyrie trying to calm the other two down. They need a new plan! Jessika isn’t having that and goes after the Coven right now, only to find….a casket. Jessika opens it up and finds….well we’re not sure as Taya slams it shut. A hand reaches out of the casket and pulls Taya in. Where to you ask? AEW.

Bully Ray/Masha Slamovich vs. Tommy Dreamer/Mickie James

For those of you who needed a preview of Dreamer vs. Ray. The men start things off with Ray going after Mickie instead. Ray wants Mickie to come in and she does exactly that after about a minute of staring. Slamovich comes in for the slugout about two minutes in but Mickie plants her with a flapjack. It’s off to Dreamer for some arm cranking before Mickie comes back in, only to have Ray pull her down by the hair.

Ray comes in for a slam as commentary is quiet for a lot of long stretches. Mickie slips away though and hands it back to Dreamer for right hands in the corner. A cutter gives Dreamer two with Slamovich making the save. The top rope seated senton drops Slamovich and Mickie plays D-Von with a WHAT’S UP (ax handle version). Everything breaks down and Ray loads up a table as Mickie dives onto Slamovich. The distraction lets Ray hit Dreamer low, setting up a piledriver for the pin at 9:26.

Rating: C. This worked when Mickie and Masha were in there, with Ray being ok enough. I’m completely with caring about anything Dreamer does, but at least his stuff was kept short. What mattered here was having the two matches set up, as strange as it is that seeing Ray pin Dreamer before they have a first blood match. Then again having them in what is very possibly the main event of a show in 2023 is strange enough.

Post match Ray loads up a powerbomb on James but here is Jordynne Grace to break it up. Grace and Ray stare each other down and Grace spears….Mickie by mistake as Ray moves.

Rich Swann and Frankie Kazarian are in the back with Swann being upset about last week. Kazarian wants him to go find Josh Alexander and settle this now. Post break Swann goes into Alexander’s locker room and finds Steve Maclin. Swann yells, with Maclin saying maybe Alexander wanted him here. Swann is confused.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

Dirty Dango/Joe Hendry vs. Moose/Brian Myers

Before the match, Dango insists that we believe in Hendry and the fans seem pleased. Hendry headlocks Myers to start and then runs him over with a shoulder. A delayed suplex drops Myers and Dango comes in as Myers rolls into the corner. Moose comes in and takes Dango into the corner but Hendry comes in to clear the ring. Hendry and Dango have two words for us….but Dango has to be reminded that they aren’t SUCK IT.

We take a break and come back with Moose sending Dango into the corner and knocking Hendry off the apron. Myers drops Dango as the alternating beatdowns continue. Moose charges into a boot in the corner though and a middle rope corkscrew uppercut gives Dango a breather. The tag brings in Hendry to clean house and a pop up powerbomb gets two on Myers. Everything breaks down and Moose spears Hendry down. Myers’ Roster Cut finishes Hendry at 13:44.

Rating: C+. Nice tag match here which set up the title match on Friday. Hendry continues to feel like a star and someone who could be a big deal if he is given the chance at some point down the line. Seeing him get pinned in a tag match is kind of a big deal as Hendry has been such a star, but he’ll be fine if he retains the title at Sacrifice.

Josh Alexander goes into his locker room and finds Rich Swann, who wants to know why Steve Maclin was here. Alexander, who is remarkably calm about two people apparently having been in his locker room, is off to find out what is going on here.

Here is Josh Alexander to talk about Steve Maclin. Alexander has seen Maclin leave a trail of bodies around here and he can respect that. What he can’t respect is the allegation that he is ducking Maclin. All that makes Maclin is someone complaining and a…..forgotten son. Cue Maclin to say that yes he is afraid to fail because he doesn’t want to go all the way back to the bottom.

He is obsessed with winning the Impact World Title and we see clips of Maclin watching Alexander’s matches from the shadows during his title reign. Alexander says he respects Maclin so bring it on right now. Maclin says nah, because he’s going to do it in Alexander’s hometown at Rebellion.

Overall Rating: C+. The wrestling wasn’t great here but it did a nice enough job of building up Sacrifice. That is trickier than it seems though, as the show isn’t the biggest in the world. The main event very well may be Dreamer vs. Ray, as the only other real option is Mickie vs. Grace. Once that is out of the way though, we’re on to Rebellion and that should work well.

So……you might need to forget a good bit of this show, as both Josh Alexander (torn tricep) and Mickie James (undisclosed) are injured and have been forced to vacate their titles. The Knockouts Title will be determined at Sacrifice and the World Title at Rebellion, with Steve Maclin facing Kushida. No word on what happens to the Multiverse United card. Egads that’s horrible, as they might have just lost their two top stars at once.

Results
Time Machine b. The Design – Hoverboard Lock to Angels
Deonna Purrazzo b. Savannah Evans – Crucifix
Bully Ray/Masha Slamovich b. Mickie James/Tommy Dreamer – Piledriver to Dreamer
Moose/Brian Myers b. Dirty Dango/Joe Hendry – Roster Cut to Hendry

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – March 16, 2023: The Balancing Act

Impact Wrestling
Date: March 16, 2023
Location: Sam’s town Live, Las Vegas, Nevada
Commentators: Tom Hannifan, Matthew Rehwoldt

Sacrifice is next week and the card, while is looking a bit stacked, is coming together. That means we are likely to get some more build towards Tommy Dreamer vs. Bully Ray this week, as that is likely headlining the show. Otherwise, the six man tag featuring Time Machine should see some more setup as well. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

In the desert, PCO screams for Eddie Edwards to come fight him.

Opening sequence.

Mike Bailey/Jonathan Gresham vs. Decay

Steve has to bail to the ropes to escape Gresham to start but a bite of the hand has Gresham in trouble. Bailey comes in and is sent outside just as fast, leaving Decay to double team Gresham down in the corner. Gresham gets sent into the corner but forearms/dropkicks his way to freedom. Bailey comes in to backflip a bit and kicks Steve down. There’s the running shooting star for two on Steve…who bites on Bailey’s boot.

The boot is fine enough for the bouncing kicks but Steve hits a clothesline for the double knockdown. Taurus comes in for his huge backbreaker into a pop up Samoan drop for two on Bailey. Everything breaks down and Gresham sends Steve outside, leaving Bailey to kick Taurus in the head for one. Steve and Gresham fight on the floor as Bailey hits the spinning kick, setting up the Ultimate Weapon for the pin on Taurus at 6:19.

Rating: C+. This was shorter than I was expecting but Bailey didn’t managed to no sell a bad knee so he is doing better than usual. Other than that, it was the partners who don’t quite like each other teaming together to beat a midcard team, which isn’t a horrible stretch. Bailey is a popular enough star to carry the opener, and the Ultimate Weapon does look painful so had a nice start here.

Post match Gresham and Bailey seem a bit testy with each other but respect is shown.

Josh Alexander, Frankie Kazarian and Rich Swann are ready for the Bullet Club tonight. They’ve been successful on their own and now it’s time to succeed together. They trust each other, but here is Steve Maclin to interrupt, with Swann not seeming pleased.

Gisele Shaw says she didn’t lost last week and blames Deonna Purrazzo. Revenge is coming at Sacrifice. Johnny Swinger and Zicky Dice come in and suggest Swinger faces….interviewer Gia Miller? Instead, he’ll face Jai Vidal.

Steve Maclin vs. Heath

Heath starts fast with some running forearms but gets sent into the corner to cut him off. Maclin runs him over with a good shot to the face until a backdrop sends him to the floor. We take a break and come back with Maclin beating him up at ringside and choking on the rope. A backbreaker gives Maclin two and we hit the abdominal stretch. Heath fights out and slugs away, including the jumping knee and powerslam for two. Maclin cuts off a bulldog though and ties him in the Tree of Woe, setting up the spear. KIA finishes Heath at 12:04.

Rating: C+. I’m still kind of amazed at what Heath has been doing in Impact as he has turned into a rather reliable in-ring star without doing much of the comedy. Granted he never really got the chance to show what he could do so maybe this has been there all along. That being said, this was all about getting Maclin another win on his path to the World Title shot and that went well.

The Death Dollz are ready to retain the Knockout Tag Team Titles but Taya says Jessika might be too much of a liability. Taya and Rosemary can handle this themselves, which (after Jessika leaves), seems to be because they think Jessika could be swayed.

PCO has walked from the desert to Las Vegas, shouting or Eddie on the way.

Jonathan Gresham calls Mike Bailey his sidekick but Bailey says he isn’t forgetting Gresham beating him. They’ll run it back at Sacrifice.

Johnny Swinger vs. Jai Vidal

Zicky Dice, Savannah and Gisele Shaw are all here too. Swinger doesn’t think much of Vidal to start and his offer of a test of strength is answered with a dropkick. Vidal drops an elbow to send Swinger into the corner but a charge misses. Dice grabs Vidal’s leg and gets ejected, with the distraction letting Swinger choke on the rope. Evans breaks up the camel clutch and gets ejected, along with Shaw. Cue Deonna Purrazzo to jump Shaw, leaving Vidal to hit a running dropkick to finish Swinger at 3:22.

Rating: C. Total comedy match here and yeah it worked well, as does almost everything that Swinger does. Having him lose over and over is a funny idea, as he is still trying to find someone he can beat. Vidal was fine enough in the ring, but this was all about Swinger (and Purrazzo in the end) and he delivered.

Deaner talks about Callihan’s sixth step when Callihan storms in to yell about last week. Callihan’s sixth step is about taking punishment, which he’ll do. Deaner seems to have an idea. Here’s an idea: WRAP THIS STORY UP ALREADY!

PCO arrives at the arena, still screaming for Eddie Edwards.

Mickie James comes up to Tommy Dreamer, who has requested that they have a mixed tag against Bully Ray and Masha Slamovich next week. Jordynne Grace comes in to say this is a bad idea and promises that she’s still coming for the title.

Here is Eddie Edwards for a chat. He has been thinking a lot and is ready to let the past be in the past. Everything that has happened before is over and it is time for him to focus on himself and his future in Impact. We look at someone in a car saving Eddie from PCO last week and…here is PCO. Before he can make it to the ring though, Kenny King comes up from behind and hits him with a shovel, allowing Edwards to come up for the double team.

Commentary speculates that King was driving Edwards’ getaway car last week before PCO sits up on the ramp. The brawl is on and PCO gets crushed between the steps and post. That’s broken up and PCO (bleeding from the back of the head) cleans house, only to have King grab a Blockbuster. The chair is put over PCO’s head and Edwards crushes it with a kendo stick. This isn’t going to end well for them is it?

Santino Marella is in the back with….Vladimir Kozlov of all people. They’re happy to be back together and then Kozlov leaves. Dirty Dango comes in and can’t say Kozlov’s name. That’s enough for SAY HIS NAME AND HE APPEARS, so here is Joe Hendry, who wants Brian Myers. Santino makes the match so Dango can gush over what a Hendry fan he is. It’s such a big deal that Santino makes Hendry and Dango against Myers and Moose.

Knockouts Tag Team Titles: The Coven vs. Death Dollz

The Dollz (Rosemary/Taya Valkyrie) are defending and Jessika is here with them. Taya crossbodies King down to start and hands it off to Rosemary for a suplex. Wilde comes in to slug away, earning a bite to the hear from Rosemary. Everything breaks down and the Coven is clotheslined to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Rosemary fighting out of a chinlock but getting pulled down by the hair. Wilde chokes in the corner but Rosemary manages a quick Upside Down. King is knocked away and the hot tag brings in Taya to clean house. The running hip attack and running knees in the corner hit King for two but Wilde hits a Fameasser over the ropes. Everything breaks down but King breaks up the Road To Valhalla. Instead Wilde hits a kick to the head and King’s pumphandle flipping faceplant connects for the pin and the titles at 11:32.

Rating: C+. Taya appearing on this week’s Dynamite didn’t exactly help with the result but well done on trying to make some new stars out of nowhere. Wilde has been trying to find her way back to prominent since her return and King has only been around for a few weeks. Nice match too, without Jessika playing into the finish as they seemed to telegraph.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

Josh Alexander/Rich Swann/Frankie Kazarian vs. Bullet Club

Kazarian flips out of Bey’s wristlock to start but Bey kicks him into the corner. There’s a running chop and it’s Austin coming in. That’s fine with Kazarian, who sends Bey outside and grabs Austin’s arm. Swann comes in and is quickly dropped with a springboard dropkick, allowing Austin to grab a headlock (as is the customary followup to a springboard missile dropkick). That’s broken up as well and it’s off to Kenta vs. Alexander, which has the fans’ approval. They slowly slug it out until everything breaks down, with Bullet Club being sent to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Bey kicking Swann in the head and motioning that Swann is asleep. Austin and Bey use some precision kicks to put Swann down for two but Bey misses a legdrop. Kenta isn’t having any of this tagging stuff though and kicks Swann right back down. Swann manages a kick though and it’s Kazarian coming back in to really clean house.

Everything breaks down and Alexander comes in to strike on Bey. The hurricanrana is countered into a powerbomb on Bey and Swann adds the middle rope 450. Austin makes the save and it’s time for the exchange of kicks to the head. Swann flips off the apron onto Swann but gets taken down by Bey.

The slingshot dive is loaded up but Kazarian pulls bey out of the air into a cutter onto the pile (that was great). Back in and Swann hits an ax kick to Bey and Kazarian adds the slingshot DDT to Austin. Kenta knees Swann down but gets dropped by Alexander. Cue Steve Maclin for a distraction though and Alexander gets kicked down. The Art of Finesse into the Fold finishes Swann at 17:57.

Rating: B. This was rolling by the end and the Maclin distraction was about all they could have done to get out of this without something rather screwy. You don’t want the new champs winning and Kenta probably isn’t getting pinned, so having Maclin there was the best way out. Rather good match too, with talented wrestlers getting time to do what they can.

Overall Rating: B-. Impact is somehow managing to build towards three shows (granted one of them is in name only for the most part) at once and thankfully they didn’t bother with that much about Tommy Dreamer vs. Bully Ray. That feud doesn’t need any more time and hopefully they can have their match and move on (yeah I know there’s no way that’s it). Other than that, you had some build towards Sacrifice, which is looking rather strong. Good show this week, as we should be in for a nice few weeks coming up.

Results
Mike Bailey/Jonathan Gresham b. Decay – Ultimate Weapon to Black Taurus
Steve Maclin b. Heath – KIA
Jai Vidal b. Johnny Swinger – Running dropkick
The Coven b. Death Dollz – Pumphandle flipping faceplant to Valkyrie
Bullet Club b. Josh Alexander/Rich Swann/Frankie Kazarian – Fold to Swann

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Impact Wrestling – March 9, 2023: There’s Good And Bad

Impact Wrestling
Date: March 9, 2023
Location: Sam’s Town Live, Las Vegas, Nevada
Commentators: Tom Hannifan, Matthew Rehwoldt

We are on our way to a trio of shows with Sacrifice, Multiverse United and Rebellion, which makes for quite the packed series of builds. That got started last week with a little something for each show getting time, but they are going to have to do it again for the next few weeks. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Here is Bully Ray to get things going. At No Surrender, Tommy Dreamer used the words “someone like me” (meaning Ray). What did he mean when he said that? Did he mean a two time Hall of Famer or half of the greatest tag team ever? Maybe a two time World Champion?

Ray wishes he knew what Dreamer meant, because he threw hot coffee into Dreamer’s face. Dreamer wants a Busted Open match at Sacrifice but there is no way Dreamer is making it there. Cue Santino Marella to call Bully “Bobby Ray” and say that Dreamer will be at Sacrifice. It was only a minor burn to his balls….er, eyeball so he’ll be fine.

Cue Bhupinder Gujjar to speak Hindi and issue a challenge for right now. Santino makes the match and we’re on. This Santino stuff is getting REALLY old as he’s still doing the same “gee I sure do talk funny” shtick, which can be charming for all of 12 seconds before you realize that he’s making the crowd chuckle over what was supposed to be a serious angle.

Bhupinder Gujjar vs. Bully Ray

Ray’s chain shot doesn’t work to start so he clotheslines Gujjar down instead. Gujjar gets up and yells a lot, seemingly inviting Ray to hit him. Ray’s right hands are shrugged off and Gujjar dropkicks him down. Ray catches him on top though and loads up the chain, which takes too long as well, allowing Gujjar to get in a shot of his own. Gujjar loads up the chain but gets low blowed for the DQ at 3:31.

Rating: D+. Remember when Gujjar was looking like he could be something? Well now he’s cannon fodder in the star making feud between Bully Ray and Tommy Dreamer. This was hardly a high energy match and was much more about Ray trying to get out of having the actual match. Nothing to see here, but thank goodness Ray got his time in.

Post match Ray chains Gujjar in the back but Tommy Dreamer comes in for the save (Why didn’t he come out earlier?). Cue Masha Slamovich to hit Dreamer low but Mickie James makes the save. The women brawl until Dreamer gets up to chase Ray off with a chair.

PCO is next to a grave with a shovel and screams for Eddie Edwards to come fight him.

Josh Alexander comes up to Rich Swann and gets him on his team for a six man at Sacrifice. Steve Maclin comes in but Swann says this isn’t about him. Frankie Kazarian comes in and Maclin leaves, with Kazarian seemingly joining Swann and Alexander at Sacrifice.

Callihan vs. Rhino

The Design and Heath are here too. They trade shoulders to start and neither goes anywhere. The fight heads outside with Callihan raking the eyes and posting him to take over. A Russian legsweep on the ramp puts Rhino down again and the seconds get in an argument. We take a break and come back with Rhino hitting a TKO for two, followed by a belly to belly. A hard clothesline out of the corner cuts Rhino off but it’s too early for the Cactus Driver 97. Angels grabs Callihan’s foot though and Khan adds a chair to the face, allowing Rhino to hit the Gore for the pin at 10:11.

Rating: C. This was as good as a ten minute Rhino vs. Callihan match was going to be as there is only so much the two of them are going to pull off. Rhino is still able to have a watchable enough match and it is nice to see him get a win here. At the same time, the Callihan/Design stuff is still pretty horrible and it needs to wrap up soon. It won’t, but it needs to.

Trey Miguel interrupts Dirty Dango and Santino Marella in the back, asking what they’re going to do for him. That works for Santino, who makes Miguel vs. a handpicked opponent at Sacrifice, plus a six way match for the X-Division Title at Multiverse United. Johnny Swinger and Zicky Dice come in to see if Miguel is as tall as Sky Low Low. With Miguel gone, Swinger asks about facing Dango, who says he’s the assistant Director of Authority. Swinger and Dice leave, so Marella says that isn’t Dango’s job. Dango: “It’s not a job. It’s a way of life.”

During the break, Callihan was mad at the Design but was told that was step #6.

Jordynne Grace vs. Alex Gracia

Grace powers her into the corner to start as we hear about Grace competing as a bodybuilder. A German suplex out of the corner gets two on Gracia but the Grace Driver is blocked. Instead Grace grabs a torture rack spin into a powerbomb. Now the Grace Driver finishes Gracia off at 2:26.

Moose comes up to Joe Hendry, who is telling jokes to a bunch of fans. Brian Myers jumps Hendry from behind and the big beatdown is on.

The Bullet Club, complete with Kenta, come in to mock Josh Alexander/Frankie Kazarian/Rich Swann. The six man is set for next week. Alexander mocks Ace Austin and Chris Bey for being overly excited about being the Tag Team Champions, which doesn’t sit well with the champs.

Jonathan Gresham vs. Kushida

They go technical to start (yes really) with neither being able to get very far. Instead they shake hands and spin around a lot while fighting over arm control. Neither gets very far so Kushida takes it to the mat and rides him a bit. Gresham reverses into a hammerlock on the mat but Kushida gets to his feet, with Gresham still cranking away. It’s finally broken up and Kushida stomps on Gresham’s hand but Gresham is right back with another armbar.

Kushida’s armbar sends Gresham to the rope so Kushida dropkicks the arm to keep him in trouble. Gresham is right back with la majistral for two so he tries it again, only to get reversed into a cradle to give Kushida two of his own. Back up and Kushida sends him into the ropes, which bangs up Gresham’s arm again. The Hoverboard Lock makes Gresham tap at 10:04.

Rating: B-. This was the technical match that you knew it would be and it made Kushida look that much better because he beat someone on his level. Both of them are established names but Kushida is on his way to the World Title shot at Multiverse United so he needed the win here. Good match, and different from everything else on the show.

Eddie Edwards goes to the grave where PCO called him out. That sounds like a very bad idea.

Here is Killer Kelly to sit in a chair and call out Taylor Wilde. Cue Wilde, who says this isn’t about Kelly but rather the future. Kelly doesn’t think much of Wilde telling the future with cards, because she controls her own destiny. Taylor pulls out the tower card and it’s KiLynn King coming in from behind to chair Kelly down. A Death Valley Driver plants Kelly again. I’ve liked King in the past so this is interesting.

Still at the grave, PCO swings his shovel at a rock.

The Death Dollz teleport in to console Killer Kelly, with Rosemary telling her that she needs to grasp the darker realm. Kelly doesn’t seem convinced but says she can handle a 2-1 situation herself. With Kelly gone, KiLynn King and Taylor Wilde come in to make the Knockouts Tag Team Titles challenge. Rosemary is in, if King and Wilde agree to give up the dark arts if they lose. Deal.

Eddie Edwards arrives at the grave but there is no PCO. Then PCO pops up behind him but misses the big swing with the shovel. They fight a bit and PCO sends him into a rock. Eddie manages to grab the shovel but PCO drops him with a reverse DDT (as you do in a fight by a grave). PCO sends him into the grave but here’s a car to run PCO over. Eddie gets in the car and rides away but we never see who is driving.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

Knockouts Title: Gisele Shaw vs. Mickie James

Shaw, with Jai Vidal and Savannah Evans, is challenging and Deonna Purrazzo is on commentary. Mickie takes her down with a headlock to start but gets reversed into a headscissors. Back up and they fight over wrist control until Mickie sends her outside for a crash to send us to a break.

We come back with Shaw sending her into the corner to take over. Mickie’s Thesz press gives her a breather though and they slowly slug it out. Shaw gets the better of things and grabs a reverse chinlock to keep James down. Back up and Shaw charges into a boot in the corner, allowing Mickie to hurricanrana her out. The comeback is on but Mickie has to dive onto the goons on the floor.

Shaw gets in a cheap shot to take over again though and the chops have Mickie in trouble in the corner. A pull of the hair drops Mickie again but she explodes out of the corner for the double knockdown. Mickie strikes away and hits a flapjack as the referee seems to tell her how much time is left. The top rope Thesz press gets two on Shaw but Vidal’s distraction breaks up the MickieDT. Purrazzo breaks that up so Shaw grabs a rollup, only to have Purrazzo turn it back over so Mickie can retain at 17:00.

Rating: B-. This match got a lot of time and the ending seems to bring Purrazzo either into the title picture or in line for a showdown with Shaw (or perhaps both). For now though, these two had a good match, with Shaw holding up her end and James being her usual awesome self. It felt like a big time main event and that is a hard trick to pull off a lot of the time.

Overall Rating: C+. This show got better as it went on but there were definitely some rocky points. There are some parts here which just aren’t very good and give me no reason to want to see what happens in them from week to week. Stuff such as Ray vs. Dreamer and the Design/Callihan stuff is just there with few positives to either of them and it hurts to watch them. Then on the other hand you have the solid Knockouts division and the main event feuds, though a lot of that seems to be on hold until we get closer to the build to Rebellion. For now though, the bad stuff gets bailed out, as the positives are quite positive.

Results
Bhupinder Gujjar b. Bully Ray via DQ when Ray hit him low
Rhino b. Callihan – Gore
Jordynne Grace b. Alex Gracia – Grace Driver
Kushida b. Jonathan Gresham – Hoverboard Lock
Mickie James b. Gisele Shaw – Rollup

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – February 23, 2023: Dang They’re Good

Impact Wrestling
Date: February 23, 2023
Location: Osceola Heritage Park, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

It’s the go home show for No Surrender and the card is set up. There is one thing though that we need to cover, which involves who gets to talk first in a live edition of Busted Open Radio. Therefore, we have a Beat The Clock Challenge between Bully Ray and Tommy Dreamer. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Motor City Machine Guns vs. Jonathan Gresham/Mike Bailey

Non-title and Gresham takes Shelley down by the leg to start. Bailey comes in and kicks away at said leg, with Gresham and Bailey taking turns on it. Shelley manages to knock Bailey outside though and it’s the Guns taking over for a change. Back in and the limping Shelley strikes away at Bailey, who comes right back with the bouncing kicks to Sabin.

Gresham and Sabin slug it out until Gresham does one of those stupid looking deals where he sends the Guns together and kicks Sabin, making him dragon screw legwhip Shelley. The Guns are back up with a Death Valley Driver/neckbreaker combination, followed by a Magic Killer for two on Gresham. Gresham suplexes Sabin and brings Bailey back in for the kicks, plus an Indian Deathlock to Shelley.

With that broken up, Shelley escapes Skull And Bones, leaving Gresham to Figure Four Shelley. That’s broken up as well and the Guns are sent outside for the double dive. Back in and Gresham gets the Figure Four again, with Bailey hitting the moonsault knees to Sabin. Bailey gets knocked down though and Sabin powerbombs him onto Gresham for the save. Gresham hits Bailey by mistake and the Guns strike away (gee Shelley’s knee healed up fast), setting up the Dirt Bomb for the pin on Gresham at 12:56.

Rating: B. This was the fast paced and all action match, though Bailey’s horrendous selling issues were spreading around here. The Guns did their thing and won as they should have, with Gresham and Bailey continuing to have their issues. It was the kind of fast paced match that you should open a show with, but my goodness sell the leg already.

Video on Rich Swann vs. Josh Alexander, with Swann wanting to get back to the top of the mountain. Alexander isn’t so sure, but does want Swann to get a title shot.

We look at Gisele Shaw and Jai Vidal getting chilied by Deonna Purrazzo on Before The Impact.

Deonna Purrazzo mocks Gisele Shaw for being bad luck and promises to break her arm at No Surrender. B****.

Beat The Clock Challenge: Tommy Dreamer vs. Jason Hotch

John Skyler is here with Hotch and promises that Dreamer is going down to one good hand. Dreamer misses a charge into the corner to start and a neckbreaker gives Hotch two. Hotch goes up top but gets caught in a super Death Valley Driver for the pin at 1:15. Well that was quick.

Joe Hendry had a meet and greet earlier today and the fans are behind him against Moose at No Surrender.

Taya Valkyrie vs. Allysin Kay

Jessika, Rosemary and Marti Belle are here too. They fight into the corner to start with Valkyrie getting the better of things and grabbing something like a reverse Koji Clutch on the mat. With that broken up, Valkyrie hits a spear for two as Kay can’t get much going so far. Kay gets kicked down in the corner to set up the running knees for two.

We take a break and come back with Kay whipping Valkyrie into the corner for a change, only to miss a charge. Valkyrie hits her hip attack, earning herself one heck of a right hand. A not so great blue Thunder Bomb gives Valkyrie two and we hit something like an STF. The rope gets Kay out of trouble and she reverses a sunset flip into a sunset driver for two. Belle offers a distraction so Kay can nail a kick to the head. With Rosemary dealing with Belle, the AK47 finishes Valkyrie at 10:34.

Rating: C. It’s good to give Kay, who is already a former Knockouts Champion, a reheating as she hasn’t been around in a long time. You need to have her built back up to make the Hex a reasonable threat to the Death Dollz and they made that work here. Valkyrie was working here and dominated most of the match too, making Kay look better in the process.

Santino Marella emcees a contract signing between Josh Alexander and Rich Swann. Alexander says Swann doesn’t have it in him, sending Swann into a speech about how he was hurt before but came back through all of his injuries. He’ll win the title tomorrow, but here is Steve Maclin to say he’s getting it anyway. Referees break up the ensuing fight.

Deaner/Callihan vs. Yuya Uemura/Frankie Kazarian

The rest of the Design is here too. Deaner has Callihan start with Kazarian and tells him to do the right thing. Callihan decks Kazarian to start so now Deaner is willing to fight for himself. Kazarian strikes his way out of trouble and brings Uemura in for an armbar. Callihan comes back in and Deaner gets in a cheap shot from the apron to take over. With the chinlock broken up, Kon pulls Kazarian off the apron to prevent the tag but Deaner misses a Swan Dive.

That’s enough for the tag to Kazarian as the pace picks way up. The springboard spinning legdrop hits Deaner but Callihan is back in with a suplex. Kazarian rolls between them and brings Uemura back in as everything breaks down. With Deaner down in the corner, Callihan tags himself back in and sends Uemura outside. A spinebuster drops Kazarian but Deaner tells Callihan to stop the Cactus Driver. The distraction lets Kazarian grab the chickenwing for the win at 9:43.

Rating: C+. Fast paced match here but egads the Callihan/Design stuff is falling flat. It feels like something we have seen so many times and there is no reason to care about whatever they do. Callihan still feels like something of a star, but the Design is as much of a dollar store version of the evil cult as you can get. Just get on with Callihan turning on them and move on already.

Video on Mickie James defending against Masha Slamovich at No Surrender, with Jordynne Grace looming over the whole thing.

Callihan wants to know how that was Deaner’s step #5, with Deaner saying it was about loyalty. Callihan is still in this, and tomorrow night, he can prove himself at No Surrender. Just remember: the Design chooses him, not the other way around.

Beat The Clock Challenge: Bully Ray vs. Bhupinder Gujjar

The clock is set at 1:15 and Ray hasn’t even bothered to put his knee pads on properly. The Good Hands immediately come in for a distraction so Ray can hit Gujjar with a chain for the pin at 30 seconds to win the challenge. I’ll take something short from Ray and Dreamer as this sets up the two of them talking at No Surrender.

Post break Tommy Dreamer gives Gujjar a pep talk.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

X-Division Title: Trey Miguel vs. Crazzy Steve

Steve, with Black Taurus, is challenging in Monster’s Ball and they’ve both been held without food, water or light for twenty four hours. There are weapons at ringside because we need to ramp up the violence. Steve chops away to start and takes him to the floor for the hard right hands.

We take a break less than a minute in (as that has now swept through wrestling) and come back with Steve being sent face first into some chairs on the floor. A big chair shot only hits post though and Steve sends him into the chairs instead. Back in and Miguel hits a fast running dropkick to take over again, meaning it’s time for a chain. More weapons are thrown in but Steve staple guns Miguel low for a breather. Steve Cannonballs into Miguel, in a trashcan, in the corner as we take another break.

Back again with Miguel grabbing a swinging neckbreaker for a breather of his own. A fork (yes a fork) to Steve’s face is blocked but Steve is busted open anyway. It’s time for the bag of tacks (of course) but Steve blocks the Lightning Spiral. The Black Hole Slam onto the tacks gets two on Miguel, with Steve pulling him up at two. That takes too long though and Miguel kicks away, setting up a stomp to the back to send Steve into the tacks.

It’s table time (because of course) but instead a double clothesline puts them both into the tacks again. With nothing else working, Miguel pulls out a metal spike, only for Steve to pull out Janice (a 2×4 with nails sticking out). With Miguel terrified, Steve Death Valley Drivers him through the table in the corner for two.

Steve gets caught on top though and a chair to the head puts him in more trouble. A quick Canadian Destroyer onto the tacks rocks Miguel again though and a delayed cover gets two. Janice to the forehead busts Miguel open even more but he gets in a low blow. A Roll of the Dice through a barbed wire table (with Miguel hitting back first) knocks Steve silly and retains the title at 22:31.

Rating: B. Your taste in hardcore/violent wrestling is going to determine everything here. There wasn’t much of anything new here but they did beat each other up and it felt like the big finish to the feud. Miguel gets to prove he can go in a different direction and looks stronger as champion as a result. The ending left a good bit to be desired, but they had a very violent match on the way there.

Overall Rating: B. The middle left a good bit to be desired, but with a pair of solid matches, Dreamer vs. Ray being kept under two minutes combined and a nice push towards No Surrender, this was another very nice use of two hours. I don’t even know why I’m surprised anymore, but Impact is rapidly approaching being the best weekly wrestling show. They have put in the work and made their show that much better, so well done on all sides with another quality show this week.

Results
Motor City Machine Guns b. Jonathan Gresham/Mike Bailey – Dirt Bomb to Gresham
Tommy Dreamer b. Jason Hotch – Super Death Valley Driver
Allysin Kay b. Taya Valkyrie – AK47
Frankie Kazarian/Yuya Uemura b. Callihan/Deaner – Chickenwing to Callihan
Bully Ray b. Bhupinder Gujjar – Right hand with a chain
Trey Miguel b. Crazy Steve – Roll of the Dice through a barbed wire table

 

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.