The old version was awful so here’s a slightly better look.

Fully Loaded 1999
Date: July 25, 1999
Location: Marine Midland Arena, Buffalo, New York
Attendance: 16,605
Commentators: Jim Ross Jerry Lawler

Earlier tonight, Undertaker attacked Austin and busted him open as the McMahons looked on.

Austin is looked at by a doctor.

The McMahons deny having anything to do with the attack. Vince guarantees Austin loses tonight.

Intercontinental Title: Edge vs. Jeff Jarrett

Edge is actually defending after winning the title the previous night at a house show. Jeff has Debra with him, who comes out in a green bikini with a jacket. Before the match, Jeff says no one is seeing the Puppies because they belong to him, just like that title. Feeling out process to start with Edge taking him to the mat for a half nelson rollup. Edge fakes Jarrett out with a middle rope cross body and gets two more off a sunset flip.

Jarrett grabs the title and teases walking out but uses it to sucker Edge out to the floor for a whip into the steps. Back in and Jeff starts going after the legs in his best Ric Flair impression, minus the charisma of course. Things get even better when Edge goes shoulder first into the post. Jeff switches over to the arm (to be fair he had barely started on the leg) before flapjacking the champ for two.

Tag Team Titles: Acolytes vs. Hardy Boys/Michael Hayes

Al Snow has been even more insane since a spike has been put through Head. Snow talks about how he hears the screams all the time and wants someone to put him out of his misery.

Hardcore Title: Al Snow vs. Big Boss Man

Snow is defending and drops to his knees in front of Boss Man in the aisle, begging to be put down. Instead Snow grabs Head and hits the spike with his nightstick, which finally makes Snow aggressive like his normal (work with me here) self. They fight over to some empty seats before Boss Man hits him back through the entrance to really make this hardcore.

Big Show vs. Kane

X-Pac comes in to drop Holly with a kick, only to have Undertaker come out and help Big Show beat X-Pac and Kane down. This is the kind of thing you should be doing on TV, not pay per view.

Speaking of things you should do on TV, Austin attacks Undertaker as he comes through the curtain and sends him into a wall to bust Undertaker open.

Ken Shamrock vs. Steve Blackman

Undertaker roughs up Terry Taylor for trying to interview him.

Chyna/Billy Gunn vs. Road Dogg/X-Pac

We recap HHH vs. The Rock, which is the rekindling of an old feud. They had an outstanding feud over the course of 1998 with HHH getting the final win in a ladder match. Now the roles are reversed as both guys want to be the WWF World Champion, which Rock has already been multiple times). At one point during this feud, HHH put Rock in a casket and beat on it with a sledgehammer in the first appearance of his signature weapon.

The Rock vs. HHH

Strap match won by pinfall (which counts anywhere) for the #1 contendership at Summerslam. HHH comes out to his awesome My Time theme music. The brawl starts in the aisle with Rock sending him into the post for an early advantage. HHH comes back with a few whips into the barricade and shots to the ribs before taking Rock inside for more of the same.

We recap Austin vs. Undertaker. Austin took the title back from Undertaker on Raw after Undertaker won it 24 hours earlier in the highest rated wrestling match in American cable TV history. Undertaker wanted his rematch to be a first blood match, which is how Austin lost his first WWF World Title, thanks to Undertaker interfering. If Austin wins, Vince is off TV forever. If Undertaker wins, Austin can never have another shot at the title.

WWF World Title: Undertaker vs. Steve Austin

First Blood with Austin defending and Vince on commentary. Austin goes after him in the aisle (a common tactic on this show) and gets sent into the barricade. We even get some common sense as Austin covers his face while Undertaker throws punches. Undertaker beats him up the aisle but neither guy can send the other into the steps. Austin ducks the steps as they fly at his head and they fight into the crowd.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 1997 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/11/20/new-paperback-complete-1997-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Note that this is VERY old and the quality isn’t what it would be today.  It should be good for a laugh if nothing else.

 

Fully Loaded 2000
Date: July 23, 2000
Location: Reunion Arena, Dallas, Texas
Attendance: 16,504
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross

This one is by X’s request so there’s your justification. The company is more or less just waiting for WCW to go under at this point as it’s not even close or funny anymore. Vince, being the nice guy that he is, cranked up the heat just to be himself. Austin is still out here, but he’s getting closer to a return. The good thing about that is you get the following matches: Angle vs. Taker, HHH vs. Jericho and Benoit vs. Rock.

Taker has just returned as the American Bad Ass and is still figuring out the character. Other than that this is really a transitional show as a lot of the Attitude Era guys are being slowly phased out while the new guys are slowly coming in. I vaguely remember this show so this is going to be a lot more of a fresh viewing than a lot of other shows. Let’s do it.

The theme of the intro is that everyone is gambling here and with a single roll of the dice everything can change. The dice are fully loaded though. So in other words, no matter how well you throw the dice or perform, the house has the advantage and you can’t win? That’s a great thing to point out.

Trish Stratus/Test/Albert vs. Hardys/Lita

Trish is a total rookie here and is just there because of her looks. This is something that they need to do with the Divas more often: put them as a manager for a long time before getting them into the ring on their own. That’s the thing: anymore, no Diva is given any kind of chance to get going or get any experience and all of a sudden they’re thrown into the spotlight and they fail.

Here, Trish can get some ring time but not enough to expose her weaknesses. That’s very smart and is a big reason why she’s one of the best ever. That being said, Trish looks incredible as she’s more or less wearing a pink swimsuit. Her abs could rival Orton’s. Lita has injured ribs here because we can’t have Lita vs. Trish in a straight match yet.

I’ve always liked Test and Albert for some reason. See what’s going on here though? We have two tag teams that have been having a moderate feud lately but the titles aren’t involved. See what having a tag division can do for you? You can have matches that don’t have to be for the belts and it can give you a decent match.

Also remember there’s no brand split yet so Raw and Smackdown had the same stories going on. Jeff gets a NICE pop as he comes in. Jeff is ridiculously fast out there. The Hardys, The Dudleys and Edge and Christian were the perfect answer to the cruiserweights in WCW. Their matches were completely insane and had very little story to them but they didn’t need one.

They were so awesome that we could overlook that and it worked every time. Now why couldn’t the cruiserweights get over like that too? Trish and her amazing ass are in for a bit but runs for her life from Lita. There we go again: Trish getting heel heat and a small amount of experience while not actually doing anything. That’s very smart.

In a cool spot, the faces hit a double suplex on Trish and Test then all three take their tops off. That’s nice indeed. I never used to be able to tell the Hardys apart. I finally got it right though: one is an overrated hack that keeps missing ring time and botches half the moves he attempts and the other is named Jeff.

Trish put Lita through a table on Raw which apparently nearly ended her career. So in six days she got injured, had time to find a doctor that decided that her career was in jeopardy, heal enough to be able to get back in shape for this match, and get doctor’s clearance to not only travel but be in the ring for this match as her career apparently isn’t in jeopardy anymore? Don’t you just love wrestling and the stupid lines of commentary that come with it?

Jeff gets destroyed for a good while until Test misses an awesome looking elbow and takes a SWEET looking mule kick to the chin so Matt can get tagged. After a big mess of a brawl, Lita gets in and hits a NICE tornado DDT from the top on Test. She follows that up with a huge dive to the floor onto Albert and then another NICE hurricanrana onto Test.

She was so ridiculously awesome around this time that it’s insane. After some cheating though, Test hits that diving powerbomb that I always marked out for on Lita to stop her cold. I think I liked Lita getting in there against the men more than I did Chyna. Chyna was trying to wrestle like a man and it got boring to me.

Lita got in there and wrestled a lucha style which is far more exciting than Chyna being able to do a handful of solid moves and a bunch of botched moves and be a witch about everything and then bragging about how awesome she was. Trish comes in to the biggest pop of the match. See what huge implants can do for you?

Lita kicks out of the powerbomb from Test though which is awesome. Trish bends over in from of the Hardys and you can easily see them checking her out. I love that. The men run in and the Hardys win that and they hit the floor where Jeff “chokes” Albert with his foot. When I say chokes I mean puts his foot about an inch away from Albert’s head so it’s not anywhere near his throat.

Lita hits the moonsault for the pin. Post match, Albert shows that the choking really didn’t work as he nails Lita (lucky bastard. I guess half the locker room fits that description though) and the heels dominate and Trish whips Lita with a belt.

Rating: B. This was a great opener as it got the crowd into the show and didn’t really do anything of important note. In other words, it was the best possible choice for an opening match. The faces should have won here and did. Trish and Lita would obviously become the biggest women’s rivalry of all time and they would have a bunch of great matches. Here though it was about looks which is fine with me as both of them had some great ones.

Edge comes up to Foley in the back and says that Christian has food poisoning. Foley doesn’t buy it.

Taker is here and chases Angle around the building on the bike. This is cooler than it sounds.

Tazz vs. Al Snow

So Tazz is a heel now for no apparent reason which is pointless as he’s still getting solid face pops. He was supposed to be getting the Benoit push, meaning he was supposed to get the title match tonight I suppose, but due to Hardcore Holly’s freaking idiocy, Tazz got hurt. Since then he’s been going around beating on random faces to prove his toughness. I guess he wanted to prove he was Tough Enough. Snow got choked out on Raw to set this up so there you are.

They say it’s a bicep injury here but I’m not sure on that one. Snow has always thrown a decent superkick. The crowd couldn’t care less about this match. That might be because there’s no point to it at all. Snow hits a moonsault that gets two as the boring chant starts up. It’s not a good sign when a moonsault gets a boring chant.

Snow grabs Head which goes nowhere as Tazz takes over again. Ross plugs the triple main event since there’s nothing going on in the ring. Tazz finally gets the Tazmission for the quick submission to complete this filler match.

Rating: D. What was the point here? It’s five minutes long and could have easily been done on Smackdown to add on to another match later on. This was stupid and not any good either so yeah. MMA fans might like this more than wrestling fans actually as both guys were using some decent judo stuff.

Christian is still sick.

We go to HHH and Stephanie where she keeps getting flowers and HHH doesn’t know who is sending them. The card says it’s true it’s true. Stephanie denies knowing anything.

European Title: Perry Saturn vs. Eddie Guerrero

Chyna is with Eddie here and looks amazing. Eddie gets a great pop here being the home state guy. Chyna is mad at Eddie for Eddie jumping in the way of Saturn to protect her. Hot but witchy. You can’t win them all. Terri who is with Saturn is terrified of Chyna. She should be as Chyna half killed her when she was Marlena.

Chyna nails Saturn and goes after Terri and we have a four way fight. 45 seconds into the match we get the graphic saying it’s for the European Title. Thanks for that one. Chyna keeps beating up Saturn for some reason. Eddie is wearing a shirt this whole time too which is just odd. Eddie hits a GREAT hurricanrana for two.

Saturn really was solid in the ring. It’s a shame he was completely nuts. Saturn is bleeding slightly from the top of his head. It’s a bit annoying having the graphics for the triple header flashing on the screen the whole time. This is a very fun match that’s reminiscent of a cruiserweight match. No matter what you try to build up or whatever, good wrestling is going to win in the end, always.

After some great high flying stuff, Saturn is knocked to the floor where Chyna beats on him some more. He actually punches her and clotheslines her through a table. Yeah that looked weirder than it sounded. With her down, Terri comes back and hits a low blow to allow Saturn to hit a top rope elbow for the pin and the title.

Rating: B+. I know that’s a high grade but this was a very fun match. They more or less just went out there and did what they wanted and it came out great. These two could work as well as anyone could and the matches showed that. It does make me wonder though: why did Eddie have to keep being in those horrible angles instead of in a big story like he was capable of being? Maybe not the world title, but at least something of note. Either way, this was very fun and I liked it a lot.

Edge and Christian are in the back and say they faked food poisoning. Foley comes in and they say they can’t defend the titles because Christian is sick. This works for about three seconds and involves a bucket. You figure the rest out. They get the APA tonight.

We go to Taker and Cole. Taker says Angle is going to need a doctor to remove his foot from Angle’s ass. We see a monitor next to them where Angle is on Taker’s motorcycle. Taker chases him off and we go back to the arena.

Tag Titles: Edge and Christian vs. APA

I miss Edge and Christian’s old entrance where the camera flies all over the place and looks for them and they’re in the entry way like normal wrestlers. Edge insults Dallas sports teams which makes me hate them quite a bit. They insult the Kennedy assassination before setting up for flash photography but the APA and their awesome music cuts them off. Bradshaw threatens to put his boot in their ears. Ok then.

He actually uses the term cheap heat. That came out of nowhere. He defends Texas by saying how many titles they’ve won. That just makes him sound like a geek. I didn’t know FTS was more commonly known as Bradshaw. Farroq gets a great step shot in on Christian right off the bat.

This starts off as little more than a squash as Bradshaw just freaking murders Christian. Edge and Christian finally get some offense in as they get the advantage on Bradshaw. I like how they use such generic offense to stay in a match for as long as they can until they can hit a much bigger move. That’s a nice little way to do something. It lasts for all of a minute though as the APA dominates again.

We hear for about the 12th time that Bradshaw is from Texas. Seriously, WHAT IS SO GREAT ABOUT TEXAS??? With the Acolytes hitting their finishers, Edge goes to the floor and grabs a belt. He gets the referee’s attention and nails Farrooq with it for the DQ. I kind of like that as it plays them holding the belts even longer. The same time though, it makes them look ridiculously weak and since they were known to keep stealing wins like that, it’s rather stupid also.

Either way it was ok I guess. Post match the champions are beaten down even more which for some reason means we should talk about the Rock? That makes no sense but at least they saved it for after the match ended, unlike WCW who likely wouldn’t have acknowledged the match going on at all.

Rating: C. It was really short and pointless but it was never dull. That’s the best thing here: they kept moving the entire time. That’s always a plus as it kept things interesting and made you want to keep watching. I really don’t like the whole cheating to keep the belts thing as it makes them look quite weak, but that’s fine I guess as it fits them to the letter. However at just over five minutes they didn’t have enough time to get anything going so it’s about as average as you can get overall.

Big Bossman is at WWF New York and asks a fan for his ID.

HHH is ticked off about Angle and the flowers. Stephanie gets tired of HHH freaking and says go get Kurt.

Angle is running from Taker and hits him in the knee with a wrench. Notice that he’s limping BEFORE he gets him but later in the match, he doesn’t limp. That’s Taker’s biggest flaw: his selling was screwed up beyond any and all belief at times.

IC Title: Rikishi vs. Val Venis

We’re in a cage here. Fink makes sure to point that out despite the BIG FREAKING CAGE around the ring. Apparently Tazz cost Rikishi the title a few weeks ago for reasons unexplained. Also Venis beat up Scotty, which apparently justifies this being in a cage.

Trish is Val’s manager here and is dressed in her more traditional attire here, meaning she still looks great. Apparently Rikishi gave Trish a stink face to start this. Lawler says can you imagine someone putting their big ass in her face? There’s a bit of wishful sounding in his voice there. Lawler isn’t sure if this is no holds barred. Seriously? He follows this up by asking what happened to that long hair Val had? Ross: “well King I would assume he got it cut.” I love Ross at times. They’re rare but they exist.

Rikishi, ever the Rhodes Scholar, tries to climb over the top instead of going through the door like anyone with a freaking mind. Why do faces have to have so much stupid pride like that? Val takes over with some bad shots to the cage. To be fair though he’s having to deal with something that has its own gravitational force.

He hits a low blow to block a stink face and then hits a weird looking move that I think was supposed to be a bulldog but turned into more or less a forearm to the back of the head. I think it was a semi botch by one of them but I’m not sure. Rikishi of course does his inside out bump.

Val, also an idiot, goes up the cage as well instead of through the door. My goodness how hard is it to just walk through the freaking thing? They fight on the top rope which Val wins, but with Rikishi down in the position for Val’s finisher, does he go for it? Of course not. Why should he when he can walk the ropes and hit an elbow instead? Val almost gets out but is caught by the ass that blocked out the sun.

They mess up badly though as Rikishi’s head is hurt by ramming it into the cage. He’s a Samoan so therefore his head can’t be hurt. Come on now people don’t you know your stereotypes yet? Val is bleeding and thankfully we don’t go to black and white to hide that. A Banzai Drop gets two as Val gets his foot on the ropes. Great, so in a match with no rules and where anything goes, the ropes are still allowed to break things up. That makes sense.

Thanks to Trish again ignoring all racial stereotypes and slamming the door on Rikishi’s head, the Money Shot gets two. Lita bounces down to the ring and whips Trish with the belt and rips her top off. The beating goes to the back as somehow this is less pointless than modern wrestling. We then get the spot of the night as Rikishi goes up top, and I mean to the top of the cage and dives off, completely crushing Val.

Do Samoans have a fetish for jumping off cages or something? This looked completely amazing and on the replay they mess up worse than I’ve ever seen as the camera totally misses Rikishi. I mean you see no wrestlers and only cage the whole shot. It’s rather funny actually. Since the referee is down from an earlier bump though, there’s no one to count. As Rikishi goes for the door, Tazz comes down and nails him with a camera so Val can pin him.

What the heck man? What’s the point in a huge bump like that unless you change the title with it? That’s just stupid. Oh yeah it’s a Rikishi match so it’s not supposed to make sense. How this guy would become top heel in about 3 months baffles me to no end.

Rating: B-. The match was fine, but seriously, what was the point of the huge spot if Val keeps the title? I know that’s what happened in MSG back in the 80s, but that was legendary whereas this was more or less forgotten a few weeks later. I don’t get it at all. The match was your run of the mill cage match otherwise though as I still hate pins in one of these. It’s not that hard to find a way for one of the guys to get out is it? That bump was INSANE though.

Oh apparently Taker had been attacked earlier on. Ross say that his knee is the size of a basketball. I give up. Taker is looking for Angle again. Apparently he’s walking off the injury.

HHH finds the guy delivering the flowers and takes him to the locker room of the guy sending them. It’s Jericho, who jumps HHH in the locker room and beats him up. That’s very creative actually. The stealing of a catchphrase never is used and it works really well when you think about it.

Shane comes out and looks like he wants to fight. He’s Benoit’s manager at the time by the way. The crowd is all over him and he actually says the word pussy. He calls out Rock who answers and cuts some funny stuff. We get Benoit on the monitor and he breaks all of Rock’s glasses and rips up his clothes.

We recap Angle and Taker where Angle cost Taker and Kane the tag titles by helping Edge and Christian. Angle then kept messing up with stupid lines and etc., including hitting Angle in the head with a sledgehammer. He even covered Taker’s bike with milk. Boy what is wrong with you?

Kurt Angle vs. Undertaker

Angle is still the good American boy here while Taker has just debuted as the bad ass, so the ending here is pretty academic. He’s still got the wrench from earlier. Angle pulls an Eric Young and is afraid of the pyro. Taker comes out before his music plays and jumps Angle and we’re in the crowd. Sadly enough Taker isn’t selling the knee in the slightest. I always liked Taker like this as he’s just freaking awesome with the beatings and the look he has going on.

We’re in the ring now as the bell goes off. Taker pulls him up from a pin which I like here. He pulls up again and drops a clear F bomb to the referee that Ross apologizes for. Angle FINALLY gets some offense in after about three minutes or so with another wrench shot to the knee. Maybe that’ll wake up Taker so he’ll sell the stupid thing for a change.

We go to knee work for a good while now which makes sense for a bunch of reasons that I think are self explanatory. With Angle having a leg lock on Taker, Lawler makes my all time favorite dumb line: “When Taker is on the mat he’s the same height as Angle.”

Just to make this perfectly clear once and for all, NO HE ISN’T. I mean dang man how hard is it to understand this? They’re still the same freaking height. I’m laying in my bed at the moment and I’m about 5’11-6’0. When I stand up, I’ll still be 5’11-6’0. When I lay down again later, I’ll still be 5’11-6’0. The height advantage that Taker has will still be present when they’re on the ground because his legs will still be longer to reach. I’ve never hated a line more than that one because it’s so stupid.

From nowhere, Taker hits a chokeslam as the crowd is WAY into this. An awesome Last Ride ends this…after seven and a half minutes. Yeah, that’s how long this lasted for. What was the freaking point of that? They couldn’t take five minutes out of the show somewhere else to give to these guys? This felt like a TV match.

Rating: D+. The time here just killed this. Angle was in WAY over his head here and it was played out really well I though. The time thing took everything out of this though as it needed another 3-4 minutes to make it good. The crowd was into it the whole way though which gives it some solid bonus points though. One thing though: Taker, LEARN TO SELL A FREAKING KNEE INJURY. I mean he wasn’t even LIMPING when we started and wasn’t any more when the match ended.

I hate that as it makes things just seem stupid, and especially when this is supposed to be human Taker instead of unhurtable Taker remember? That’s just freaking stupid. Also seriously, Angle would become world champion in about 3 months and he just got his ass handed to him. What’s the point of that? Couldn’t they have pulled Snow vs. Tazz and used this instead?

We recap HHH vs. Jericho. At KOTR, Jericho had kissed Stephanie for no apparent reason. In an amusing bit, we get three separate instances of HHH telling Commissioner Foley that he wants Jericho’s ass. Well ok then. Anyway, Jericho then cost HHH the #1 contendership so HHH isn’t happy at all. He and DX (they’re still around???) beat him up with the hammer, and apparently that’s validation for the 2nd ever last man standing match.

We see Rock going to his locker room to see all his stuff ripped up. Why does he have about eight outfits for one show in Dallas?

HHH vs. Chris Jericho

If you’ve already forgotten the stipulation here, lay off the drugs and fast. They start off immediately and the crowd is still as hot as they were to start the show. See what a great opener and a great crowd can do for you? HHH picks up a piece of the table destroyed earlier and beats on Jericho with it as we’re on the floor 40 seconds into the match. Well at least they’re not wasting time getting to the violent part. Stephanie looks completely delicious here.

This is just a glorified brawl at the moment which is fine. That’s what a match like this is supposed to be like so it’s perfectly fine. HHH pulls the bandages off of Jericho’s ribs and works on the ribs. Why would you wear tape to the ring? It’s a bullseye there. If they weren’t taped, the opponent might work on the knee otherwise or something like that. Ross just sounds like he has latent homosexual feelings towards HHH.

I mean seriously, he’s always going off about him and I just keep thinking he’d love nothing more than to humble him and then get humbled by him. Stephanie beats on Jericho a bit as this is all HHH otherwise. The ribs are at least offering a bit of a story to the match. They’ve been on the floor for the majority of the match here. They mention that the mats are more or less pieces of carpet out there. Don’t tell Bill Watts they exist.

This protecting the wrestlers a bit is just freaking evil and can’t be allowed to ever happen again! HHH hooks an abdominal stretch that would have Monsoon rolling over in his grave. In other words, it’s about as traditional as you could possibly imagine. Jericho gets a shot in and the crowd EXPLODES. This is one of the best crowds I’ve seen in a long time.

Jericho makes a short comeback and goes for the Lionsault but HHH gets the knees up and then hits a DDT for about 8. Again being smart, HHH uses a sleeper. I usually hate that move but here it makes perfect sense to use it. That gets 9 or so and HHH is TICKED. He hits a Pedigree and lays on the top rope like Shawn used to do. After a 9 count that takes about a minute to do, Jericho is up AGAIN. HHH gets a chair and lands a few shots and goes for a Pedigree on it but a low blow saves Jericho. It was thunderous apparently. DANG.

HHH’s head more or less explodes with blood after a chair shot. I mean he’s bleeding BAD. Fans are completely into this too. Jericho cranks it up a bit here by going into his sequence of stuff and ending with the bulldog onto a chair. We’re back on the floor again with Jericho dominating. Just as I say that Jericho goes into the stairs. This is pretty freaking good. And never mind that as Jericho gets a counter.

This back and forth stuff is working quite a bit. Uh oh HHH is getting the announce table ready and they both get a shot with monitors so they’re both down. Both guys get up at nine and back in the ring Jericho hooks the Walls. HHH taps like crazy but it means nothing. Just like in the cage, why should ropes get a break when ropes mean nothing? Oh ok it doesn’t. That makes things a lot better.

Jericho pulls him back to the middle which means nothing really. Stephanie comes in and gets some Walls too which makes her top fly up which isn’t a bad thing at all. We’re on the floor again which is ok in a match like this as that’s the point. HHH swings the newly found hammer at Jericho but it hits the post instead. HHH takes a slingshot into the post which is always a cool bump.

They get on the table and HHH hits a jumping belly to back suplex where his back lands squarely on the edge of the table which means he would be hurt a lot worse, or at least I would think so. HHH gets up just in time to beat the count while Jericho is out. As Ross puts it, he was up at ten and down at eleven. Ok on another look, Jericho doesn’t hit anything but the floor on the last bump so that’s fine.

Rating: A. These two beat each other up something fierce out there. The key to it though, as always in a great match: I didn’t know who was going to win until the very end. The cut on HHH’s head was AWESOME though and the blood helped a lot.

These guys always had good chemistry together, but at some point in their careers, Jericho needs to beat HHH clean in a big match. There were plenty of times where Jericho almost had it, and that’s what made this work. It wasn’t a match where the ending was obvious because it wasn’t, an that’s what made this great.

We recap Benoit vs. Rock. Benoit and Shane had joined forces since both hated Rock for no apparent reason. More or less they played up Benoit being really great at hurting people. Yeah that’s about it.

WWF Title: Rock vs. Chris Benoit

If Rock gets disqualified, Benoit becomes champion. In a great touch, Benoit comes out with one of Rock’s torn shirts and Shane is wearing some of his broken glasses. I love that. Shane tries to jump Rock which fails completely.

They start fast of course as the announcers mention there’s not much left to destroy here which is true. Rock launches Benoit into Shane who goes flying. Rock almost gets a crossface on which he had done before.

There’s a different dynamic here as instead of the match before where there was no clear winner, it’s relatively clear here that Rock is going to win in the end, but at the same time there’s a different aspect to it as it’s not clear how Rock is going to beat Benoit. This is a very intense match as it’s a shame that Rock’s in ring ability was so overshadowed by the other aspects of his character.

He could always go in the ring though and this is proof of it. We’re so used to seeing him do nothing but brawl that it’s almost shocking to see him go with a technician like Benoit. Shane keeps interfering which doesn’t happen so much that it distracts from the rest of the match. That’s a great thing as it adds to the match just enough that it doesn’t distract at all. That’s very hard to do but it’s working here.

Benoit gets the crossface a few times but it doesn’t work obviously. Shane interferes again with a chair and whacks the referee. Rock gets the chair and drops it as the referee is turning over before locking in a crossface on Benoit, who gives up. The crowd pops huge for that and that ends the show.

OR DOES IT???

Fink announces that as a result of a disqualification, BENOIT IS THE NEW WORLD CHAMPION! He blasts Rock in the head with a chair as the smarks have officially dies and gone to heaven.

OR DO THEY???

Yeah here’s Foley to say that it doesn’t count. This actually made me roll my eyes despite knowing it was coming. What in the world is the point of having referees who allegedly have the final say if the Commissioner or whatever constantly overturns decisions and changes things? It’s just overkill and pointless. Of course the match restarts and after surviving the longest crossface in recorded history, Rock hits the Rock Bottom to win it and close the show.

Rating: A-. The stupid overbooking aside, this was great stuff. This right here is what WCW should have done with Benoit. It’s ok if you don’t put the world title on him for a long time, but dang it let him be in the main event! If this was WCW, Benoit would have been fighting in the cage match for a pointless midcard title or fighting Eddie to win the European Title to try to make him seem important while not really doing anything at all because that belt was worthless.

However, getting twenty plus minutes of these two works fine for me, especially in a minor PPV like this. It does a few things: Benoit gets to main event a PPV so he gets some big match experience, AND Rock gets a successful title defense over a guy he should beat.

Now tell me, why can’t they do more of this today? Granted this is being written the day before Sheamus vs. Cena in the tables match so maybe they are. I hope so. Anyway, this was very solid, bad ending aside. I get why Benoit didn’t get the belt here and I’m fine with that.

Overall Rating: B+. This was a really fun show. I don’t know if I’d call it great, but it’s certainly worth seeing. It’s a more laid back PPV in the vein of a good In Your House, which often times is what a PPV needs to be. When you have the drama and build to something like Mania or Summerslam, it’s good but it gives you a lot to live up to. Here, it’s Fully Loaded.

How much expectation do you have here? That helps a lot because if it sucks you’re not disappointed but if it’s good like this was, you get your money’s worth because you didn’t expect a good show. It’s saying a lot when Taker is the worst guy on the show, but that’s the case here. This show worked a lot and I really liked it. Check it out if you get the chance.

Fully Loaded 1999
Date: July 25, 1999
Location: Marine Midland Arena, Buffalo, New York
Attendance: 16,605
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

So with 5 WWF PPVs left in the 1990s, I figured I might as well start getting that number whittled down. Not to mention that one of the 5 was a request so why not just get them all done? The main event is Austin vs. Taker in a first blood match where Austin can lose not only the title but also he would never be allowed to fight for the title again. If he wins he keeps the title and Vince can’t appear on TV ever aga. Other than that we have HHH vs. Rock in a strap match. The card is you standard 99 awesomeness so let’s get to it.

The opening video is about one of us has to go which is the basic theme of the show so there we are. There’s also a picture of a train. Sure why not. We get a clip from Heat where Taker jumps Austin and busts him open. Why that dastardly villain! Austin might need stitches. Vince denies being behind it.

Intercontinental Title: Edge vs. Jeff Jarrett

Edge is actually champion here having won the title at a house show like two days prior to this. Apparently Edge got the shot because it was supposed to be Ken Shamrock but Ken couldn’t get to the show for unspecified reasons, so this is a total shock to the fans. Debra is wearing a bikini and a jacket over it. She’s really not that hot either.

Edge looks really young to say the least. The fans want puppies as we start off very fast. I keep trying to get what the one thing that the Attitude Era has that today doesn’t and I think it’s the unexpectedness of things. I mean who would believe that Edge would win the belt at a house show the night before a PPV?

Look at what happened before the show: Taker jumped Austin. It’s something that adds to the main event and stacks the odds against Austin. Jarrett works on the knee which is smart if nothing else. Granted it also could be having guys like this get 15 minutes on PPV and time on Raw to show off. And now Jarrett goes to the arm. Why? Jarrett hooks a sleeper and of course it doesn’t work. Edge was REALLY good before he messed up his neck. He throws in the Sting headbutt to the balls.

Lawler refuses to acknowledge Edge as champion for some reason. Edge kind of hits a tornado DDT. He had the spear back then? I didn’t know that. He goes to the floor and someone attacks him in the dark. The lights come back on and there’s a big pool of “blood” and Gangrel is out next to Edge. Well that was rather shall we say pointless? The spear hits and Debra is up of course. Gangrel interferes and Jarrett hits the Stroke for the pin to get the title back.

Rating: B. Very solid match here. Again, Jarrett is great in the midcard. Edge got to showcase himself very well here so what more can you ask for? This got the time that it needed and it worked rather well I thought. Granted I really like Edge.

As Jarrett is getting the belt we cut to Austin getting taped up and he leaves. He runs out and stuns Jarrett and yells at Taker. He says Taker is going to bleed before the match starts. Again, it felt unpredictable, which makes it more exciting. Jarrett couldn’t even get out of the ring. That’s saying a lot as far as the rapid pace of the show.

Tag Titles: Acolytes vs. Hardy Boys/Michael Hayes

Yep it’s a handicap match. At this point I had zero clue which was Matt and which was Jeff. We start in the aisle where they just leave the belts. Who would have thought two of these four would win world titles? I don’t think this has started yet. According to Ross it has. Ah there’s the bell so Ross was wrong.

We have Farrooq and Jeff in there to start while Bradshaw beats up both guys on the floor. Matt takes out everyone with a top rope moonsault. They really were great fliers back in the day. Hayes is pretty freaking worthless here but what did you really expect? The APA takes over with just power. Matt picks to tag Hayes. Why in the world would you do that? We get a Freebird reference so I’m good for the night. There’s Jeff. Crowd is DEAD for this.

I think Lita helped them a good bit to say the least. The Hardys simply aren’t that good at this point. Bradshaw gets a nice belly to back suplex off the top. Not bad. Jeff clocks him with Hayes’ cane over the head. Poetry in Motion is still very much a work in progress here. Hayes comes in and a double powerbomb gives the APA their titles back. Edge, Christian and a ladder would be coming soon.

Rating: D+. I didn’t like it at all. Hayes was just in the way here as he’s old and most of the people here don’t know what he used to be nor do they care more than likely. The Hardys would dump him maybe the next night. Either way, the APA would lose the belts to Kane and X-Pac two weeks later so this was just to get Hayes out of the Hardy picture.

Austin is looking for Taker.

D’lo says he wants the European Title back. He’s rather good on the mic.

European Title: Mideon vs. D’lo Brown

Mideon literally found the belt in the back and said he was champion. Ok so not everything in this era was a great idea. Well it’s different I guess. WCW would do the exact same thing with Jim Duggan and the TV Title in about 6 months but even fewer people cared.

D’lo is a guy that’s actually pretty sweet in the ring but he never got a push of note. I always liked him though. Mideon was a guy that had some of the weirdest gimmicks ever but he kept his job anyway so if nothing else he was good enough to keep around. Nothing bad about that at all. Mideon shouts loudly and I think he’s not supposed to be heard.

This is about as basic of a match as you can ask for. Definitely something that belongs on Raw. Smackdown didn’t exist as a regular show yet. Brown botches a tornado DDT for two. Mideon turns around and walks into the Sky High. Low Down gives him the title back to a surprisingly NICE pop.

Rating: C-. I like Brown so there’s your justification. This should have been on Raw though as there is nothing special at all about this match to warrant a PPV spot. To be fair though they kept it short so it’s not like this was eating up PPV time and it wasn’t really bad or anything. Just no need to put it on the PPV.

Three title matches, three new champions.

Austin is doing the same thing.

Snow is with Cole. Snow insisted that Boss Man beat him up. Head has had a spike driven through it and Snow is hearing the screams from it. This was OUT THERE.

Hardcore Title: Al Snow vs. Big Boss Man

Obviously this is hardcore rules. Snow meets him in the aisle and throws down Head and the belt. Boss Man picks up the Head and beats on the spike with the nightstick, bringing Snow to his knees in agony. Ah now the fight is on. Snow is in an anvil case now. That doesn’t last long as he nails Boss Man with a sandbag.

We haven’t even gotten close to the ring yet. Snow keeps telling Boss Man to hit him. We’re in the back now and there goes the cameraman. I’ve always loved Snow’s striking. Hot coffee to Boss Man. We have a first down marker. Sure why not? Boss Man tries to run Snow over with a golf cart but can’t start it. Much funnier than it sounds. Snow rips a potted plant up by its roots and hits Boss Man with it. Ok then. We’re outside now and a bulldog hits on the concrete for two.

Snow keeps yelling to make the voices stop and beats up Boss Man for not doing it. The people outside must be most confused. Yep let’s stop traffic for this fight. Snow is smiling now. I’m cracking up at this for some reason. Snow is handcuffed to a fence and beaten with a rod for the pin I guess. Boss Man runs back into the arena to get his title.

Rating: C. I’m going with average here as it was a crap match but for some reason it was entertaining to me. Snow was NUTS and played that character better than anyone else ever could. I loved it, most won’t.

We recap Show vs. Kane which started as them one upping each other until Taker and Kane reunited. That didn’t last long as they started fighting again. Hardcore Holly is the referee here. Uh, WHY? Oh it’s the superheavyweight thing.

Big Show vs. Kane

I want to see the bullet Holly took for Vince as it must have been freaking huge for him to keep getting pushes, even small ones like this. This was when Show was face and was just going from feud to feud with zero direction. He would get the title in about 5 months. Kane is face too as this is just for bragging rights I guess.

Show hits a gorilla press on Kane. Show leads by one apparently. The big punch misses and we’re in straight big boy brawl mode here. The replay of Show throwing Kane over the top off the press slam has a great sound effect as he hits the ground. Even on Kane’s outfit the chop sounds good. DANG Show is scary strong.

How much of an explanation do you need for these two fighting? Show gets a sweet powerslam on Kane after saying I’m going to powerslam him. This match is an Ezekiel Jackson special: this right here is domination.

Kane makes his comeback and when he goes for the chokeslam he chop blocks Kane and Show hits his chokeslam and gets a fast count. X-Pac comes out and beats up Holly. Taker comes out and beats up X-Pac. Taker and Show join forces in the eternally changing polyamorous trio of big man bromances.

Rating: B-. That’s mainly for Show being freaking SCARY strong. What in the world was the need for Holly though? That makes no sense at all but it’s 1999 so there you are. Show vs. Kane is hard to get wrong other than at KOTR so this was fine. Show was very impressive.

Austin jumps Taker coming through the curtain and busts him open.

We recap Blackman vs. Shamrock, which can be called the Battle of Overrated Shoot Fighters. Seriously, neither guy ever lived up to their potential. Definitely not Shamrock.

Ken Shamrock vs. Steve Blackman

Of course it’s not traditional. We’re in the parking lot and they’re in a ring of cars. Various people are sitting on the hoods and smacking them in rhythm and I’m getting images of Freaks. Maybe 5 people will get that. They get their own entrance music for this. Think of Cena vs. Eddie from Smackdown one night.

Again, it’s unsanctioned but they use WWF music and a WWF referee. Should be noted that the newest of these cars might be ten years old. And they’re already outside the circle. I feel like I’m in kindergarten or something. Yep it’s boring already.

Blackman gets a chain from nowhere. Mabel and Slaughter are there in case you’re wondering for some odd reason. STOP THE FREAKING HONKING! Garbage can is brought in. Shamrock wraps the chain around his fist and a punch or 8 ends this. Oh ok the choke with the chain ends it.

Rating: N/A. Not a match or anything like that. Very short though so nothing unbearable or anything like that.

Terry Taylor, called Rooster, is with Taker. Taker beats him up!

Chyna and Billy Gunn say they’ll win.

Chyna/Billy Gunnvs. Road Dogg/X–Pac

The winner gets to call themselves DX. Ok then. Seriously, how did we never get the big Gunn vs. Dogg feud? They had a few matches but nothing big or long. Remember Pac got beaten up by Show and Taker so he’s not at full speed. Billy and Chyna have matching tights, including thongs.

After the usual intro from Roadie, we’re on. Something tells me the beating earlier was due to some slight to acute intoxication. Pretty sure the all male team is heel here but I’m not sure. Ok maybe it’s the opposite. God bless Russo. They argue over who started DX. Only Chyna can have a claim to that. The Outlaws finally explode and yep, Chyna and Gunn are heels. Chyna is rather sluggish here. Crowd isn’t really caring.

Why in the world do she and Pac need to be there? Gunn vs. Roadie is the MONEY feud here but they never pulled the trigger on it. Gunn hits a Jackhammer. Pac finally gets the tag and cleans ring for a bit and then that ends as he has to be beaten on to be worth anything apparently. This is a rather boring match to say the least. Ross makes gay jokes about Gunn’s tights. Pumphandle on Billy ends it.

Rating: D. Total misfire here as I was so bored on this whole match. Nothing of note here other than Chyna looking good of course. The angle was ok but there was zero point to this being a tag and not some form of the Outlaws going one on one.

Austin is ready.

We recap HHH vs. Rock. Oh come on like this needs an explanation. More or less it’s NOD vs. DX but at this point the face/heel dynamic has been flipped. If nothing else clips of the ladder match are always awesome. This was when HHH was going insane and turning into the Game. Rock accused HHH of sucking up to Vince. He hadn’t married Stephanie at this point.

HHH vs. The Rock

It’s a strap match and the winner gets the title shot at Summerslam. After HHH’s entrance Rock makes fun of Cole which is always great. Who would believe Cole would be employed longer than Rock? Rock thinks HHH was held down not because of politics but because he absolutely sucked.

Sweet goodness this would light the world on fire in a year. And it’s immediately on. Rock isn’t tied on yet. Like I said this was the main push for HHH to the level he’s at today as he rose to the title, winning it the night after Summerslam. Oh you win by pinfall here. Oh and I still hate this gimmick. We’re in the crowd now so I’m guessing this is No DQ? Apparently it’s falls count anywhere. Ok then.

We’re in the crowd for the better part of ever but at least the match can end there so it’s not pointless. A clothesline gets two for HHH as we discuss the MSG Curtain Call. Ross says the dirt sheets and internet made that up. Reality would suggest otherwise I’d say. We’ve been fighting 10 minutes and they were in the ring maybe 20 seconds. Hey we’re in there again! Here’s Chyna who was told to stay out by HHH. Rock Bottom hits but she’s on the apron.

To be fair though she caused HHH to lose his focus to allow the move to connect in the first place. HHH chokes Rock with the strap. HHH removes the strap after beating on Rock a lot. The problem with this is that he has given Rock a free weapon to use. And here’s Billy with a club to blast Rock to give HHH two. The elbow gets two as Billy grabs the strap, allowing the Pedigree to hit and send HHH to Summerslam.

Rating: B-. Not bad I guess but nothing compared to what these two would do. The interference was annoying but I liked the whole falls count anywhere thing which kept the crowd fighting relevant. Not a bad match but by comparison to the rest of their series, this was pretty weak.

We recap the epic feud with Austin vs. Taker/Vince which I’ve gone through time and time again. Basically Austin beat Taker for the title on Raw the night after KOTR and then Taker busted him open. He wanted the rematch to be first blood. Austin loses and can never challenge for the title again and if Taker loses Vince is off TV forever.

WWF Title: Steve Austin vs. Undertaker

Vince is on commentary here. He’s also on crutches due to a legit car wreck. Taker’s music at this time was awesome. The entrances take the better part of ever and they brawl in the aisle to start of course. Austin uses psychology and covers his head. See how much something like that aides things?

The idea here is more or less nothing but head shots which makes sense here so I can’t complain. And now it’s your standard brawl. These two had some serious lack of chemistry together and never had that great match you would think they would have. Austin goes for the knee, which makes sense if you think way too hard about it. Hard to punch someone hard when you’re on your back I guess.

After a lot of brawling and heads being looked at, we hit our climax (I wonder if it was good for them too) as Taker does the Andre spot of being tied in the ropes and Austin has a chair. Shane runs out and slides in but before his head is even up Austin drills him in a cool looking spot. Vince’s face is PRICELESS.

Taker unhooks the buckle but Austin hits the Stunner. This was back when Austin had abs if you can believe that. Austin takes a chair to the back from Taker after beating up Vince. X-Pac is here and more or less hits a Van Terminator on Taker. A TV camera to the head and then a quick cutaway for blading purposes keeps the title on Austin. Austin beats up Vince and fights Taker to end the show.

Rating: C-. Didn’t like it but it could have been far worse. It’s kind of a weak gimmick but it fit the angle so there we are. Austin would fight HHH at Mania but lose the title to Foley before going off for neck surgery and missing a year. Not a bad match but it was missing a spark definitely.

We get exclusive home video footage of HHH saying he’s ready for Austin and Vince being carried out.

Overall Rating: B-. Solid stuff here but at the same time there are some boring parts. One of the key things here is a TON of in ring time. There are very few backstage segments or moments that are just wasted. That’s the perk here. You have four new champions and five title matches. Every match has at least a decent angle behind it.

The wrestling isn’t great but it’s certainly not bad at all. Nothing jumps off the page, but the wrestling talent would be coming soon with Benoit, Angle, Jericho and Guerrero being there in less than 6 months. Good show overall but not great. Steady is a good word for it if that makes sense.

 

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Monday Night Raw
Date: July 20, 1998
Location: Broome County Arena, Binghamton, New York
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the go home show for Fully Loaded and that means we’re six weeks from Summerslam. That’s really all that matters at the end of the day, because this PPV certainly didn’t. There are two more Brawl For All matches because someone hates me. We also have a title match and a title change which I have a story about. Let’s get to it.

Here’s Vince to open the show. He says he wants to talk about what happened when Taker became #1 contender. We get a clip of Undertaker dressing up as Kane, which makes Vince wonder where Kane was and where Undertaker got that outfit. Last week he asked and was given no answer. Now we get a clip of the ending of last week’s show where Undertaker saves the pinfall on Kane. We also get clips of the brawl to end the show.

Vince calls Taker out and wants to know what’s going on. He blasts the dead man for thinking he can do everything on his own and that he won’t take the disrespect anymore. Undertaker still won’t answer if he’s with Kane or not. Since he won’t answer, Vince makes it him vs. Kane/Mankind tonight. Before Taker leaves, Vince tries to tell Taker where to go but it’s a chokeslam instead. The Stooges come out and are beaten up too.

European Title: D’Lo Brown vs. HHH

Brown takes over early on but HHH takes him down with a quick clothesline. Rock is watching from ringside. Trips ducks his head and takes a kick to the face. Pedigree is countered but HHH clotheslines Brown to the outside. He gets in Chyna’s face and has his blocked knocked off. Back in D’Lo takes over for a few moments but HHH hits the jumping knee to the face to take over. Suplex by the Game looks to set up the knee drop but Rock trips Trips. Chyna takes care of Rock as HHH hits a powerslam. Henry comes out and Chyna meets him with a chair. Rock comes in with a Rock Bottom and D’Lo wins the title.

Rating: C-. Quick story about this match. This show was taped on the 14th. Sometime over the weekend I went to a house show where Brown was already acknowledged as champion. Based on that, I already knew that HHH was going to lose the title when this show aired. That’s probably my first experience with a spoiler. The match was nothing of note at all but it advanced the DX vs. Nation feud.

The Nation celebrates the title win.

Sunday Night Heat is coming.

Brawl For All First Round: Quebecer Pierre vs. Steve Williams

Doc destroys him and the referee calls it with seven seconds to go.

We get a clip from Val’s movie last week with Yamaguchi-san’s wife.

In the arena, Yamaguchi says that his wife is going to be punished. He treats his wife like a slave and she has to crawl through his legs and get paddled. Val runs in to make the save and leaves with Yamaguchi’s wife.

Animal vs. Skull

Oh dear. There’s no Hawk. Animal won’t get in the ring when it’s 3-1 but the DOA comes after him. Animal goes into the steps and beaten down. No match. Ellering tries to run over Animal with the motorcycle but Hawk makes the save. He gets beaten down also and the DOA stand tall as well as bald.

Jeff Jarrett vs. Steve Blackman

Blackman sees that he’s up against four guys so he goes to the back and comes back with Shamrock and Severn. Blackman takes him down quickly and hits a backbreaker for two. Shoulder block gets the same. A middle rope headbutt misses so Jarrett goes for the leg. Blackman kicks it off and the bicycle kick ends this. Basically a squash.

Owen runs out and sends Shamrock into the steps then runs back into the crowd.

Taker has his stuff with him and is walking out.

Cole says Taker has left. He said he’ll see us Sunday.

Here’s Austin for an interview with JR. Austin throws JR out quickly and says he wants to know which side Undertaker is on this Sunday. Vince comes out and talks about screwing, so it’s Austin taking Vince’s place tonight. Austin says there’s no point to it so he’s not fighting. Vince says if Austin doesn’t do it then Taker gets the title without a match. Austin says after he beats the monsters, Vince is next.

We get a clip from last week of Jason Sensation. That Shawn impression is scary good.

Owen Hart vs. Farrooq

Farrooq tries a quick backbreaker but Owen slips down the back and speeds things up to take control. Owen hooks a Boston Crab as this has been much closer to a squash than you would expect. Owen beats him down and grabs a mic to tell the fans he is not a nugget. Enziguri gets two. A powerslam by Farrooq gets two but Owen comes back with a missile dropkick. Farrooq actually goes up but gets crotched, setting up the Sharpshooter for the quick tap.

Rating: D+. I didn’t exactly expect a squash here. It’s not a terrible match but it being a squash was very surprising. Farrooq wouldn’t do much until forming the Acolytes (called Hell’s Henchmen at the time) with Bradshaw later in the year. Owen looked good here and would have a Dungeon Match on Sunday with Shamrock.

Shamrock runs out post match and chases Owen through the crowd.

Bearer won’t quite say whose side Taker is on. Mankind says kicking Austin in the teeth gives him pleasure.

Here are Mero and Jackie. Jackie trash talks Sable and offers her a chance to come out here and forfeit the bikini contest. Sable comes out in a maternity dress. She takes it off to reveal a bikini. Since she’s been in Playboy, this doesn’t do much. Edge comes in through the crowd and hits Mero with a Downward Spiral.

HBK comes out for commentary again.

They finally come to their senses and just show highlights of 8-Ball and Scorpio’s Brawl For All. Scorpio wins by decision.

The Nations says Rock will keep the title.

Intercontinental Title: The Rock vs. X-Pac

DX runs in and a big brawl starts. We take a break and come back with the bell ringing. Chyna comes out as the only person at ringside. It’s power vs. speed here which isn’t something you often see with Rock. He’s a big guy but he’s never been one to use power to excess. Rock takes X-Pac down but Pac comes back with right hands. He speeds things up but Rock LAUNCHES him in a release hot shot which sends Pac to the floor.

Samoan Drop gets two as does a swinging neckbreaker. A quick chinlock sets up the People’s Elbow which only gets two. Pac grabs an X-Factor out of nowhere but he’s too spent to cover immediately. Bronco Buster hits but Pac charges into a powerslam for two. X-Pac throws him to the floor and grabs his knee to distract the referee. Chyna hits Rock with the title which gets a VERY close two. Rock’s clothesline misses and down goes the referee. A spin kick sends Rock down but here are D-Lo and HHH. HHH Pedigrees Rock after crotching Rock but a second referee runs out to say what he saw and it’s a DQ.

Rating: B-. This was a pretty rocking match before the overbooked ending. These Nation vs. DX brawls happened every week and it was cool to see a feud like this getting time, but I was hoping to see an ending to that match. Rock is a guy that isn’t big enough to make Pac’s offense look ridiculous, which means the match is a lot better. Fun stuff.

DX and the Nation get pulled apart again. The Nation is pulled to the floor and HHH gets a hot girl in the crowd to flash him. In other news, Jerry Lawler has volunteered to serve HHH for the rest of his life.

Kane/Mankind vs. Steve Austin

Austin hits Mankind with the title on the way to the ring. The tag champions don’t have to tag. Vince is watching in the back and is pleased. Austin manages to clothesline Kane to the floor and sends him into the steps. Back in a clothesline gets two on Mankind. He gets caught in the Claw though and they stumble to the floor.

Austin rams Mankind into the post but Kane is back up again. Back in and Austin hits the Thesz Press but Mankind pulls him to the floor. Back in again and a Stunner to Kane is countered. Here comes Undertaker with a chair. Mankind is now on the apron in a corner so maybe they do have to tag? Taker is in Austin’s corner and it’s back to Mankind. Foley hits Austin with a chair on the outside but his running knee in the corner misses. Austin grabs a Stunner to Mankind but Kane makes the save.

Kane tries the chokeslam but Austin kicks him low to escape. Taker pulls the chair up and swings it down but it hits Kane. Taker looks annoyed but it’s hard to say. Austin hits them all with the chair to end the show. If it wasn’t announced already, the match on Sunday is for the titles.

Rating: C+. All things considered, this was pretty entertaining stuff. The idea of Austin having to fight everyone on the planet at once was a good idea because that’s what he was best at: wild brawls that resulted in him being able to hang in there. The ending adds even more questions to the title match on Sunday, which is what the whole thing is built around.

Overall Rating: C+. I liked this one better than last week’s as the idea here was to have the PPV pushed even harder, which they certainly did. If you add that to one of the Brawl for All matches being clipped to highlights, there wasn’t much wrong on this show at all. It’s not great, but it did what it needed to do which is all you can ask for most of the time.

Here’s Fully Loaded if you’re interested:

In Your House 23: Fully Loaded
Date: July 26, 1998
Location: Selland Arena, Fresno, California
Attendance: 9,855
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross

So King of the Ring has come and gone and as I’ve gone over, we know what the double main event was and I’m sure you all know what happened in those matches so I’ll spare you the details. Ken Shamrock is your new king and that went absolutely nowhere. Not a lot really happened other than the main events but the Raws were the big deal for your buildup here. The main thing going on at the time was Austin feuding with just about everyone with Taker slowly becoming a tweener.

Your main event is Austin and Taker trying to get the tag titles from the new champions Kane and mankind. It was all leading up to the big feud with Taker and Kane against Austin, eventually being revealed as being masterminded by Vince himself. In reality, this show was more of a catalyst than a big show, but that doesn’t mean it’s bad. Let’s see if it is or not.

Oh I almost forgot: a guy that walked the streets and subways, screaming because he was bordering on being completely psychotic and beating up random people had debuted about a month before this. His name was a strange one: Edge.

The intro more or less just talks about how Austin has been facing everyone and somehow still has the title. Nothing special here at all but it gets the job done I suppose.

Val Venis vs. Jeff Jarrett

Jarrett now has the Godwinns, now known as Southern Justice, as his bodyguards. Venis was controversial to say the least as he is likely the most envelope pushing character in company history as he jumped WAY over the line many times. However, he was a very  good wrestler that is often overlooked. Kaientai of all people come to the ring with their boss doing commentary and clearly doing an impression of a Japanese accent.

Their feud was over his wife sleeping with Val and appearing in one of his “videos.” This would end up with Val allegedly being castrated on Raw which was freaking creepy at the time and actually ended the show which was odd indeed. It also involved Taka turning heel and completely killing the division. Jarrett hits a DDT and the comments are great from both guys.

Ross says that anyone would go limp from that, which Lawler says he planted him like a geranium. What kind of a comparison is that? Venis really was underrated in the ring. He’s got a nice variety of offense which is a rare thing to see and he rarely made any noticeable mistakes. Apparently Austin thinks Taker is going to turn on him and that it’ll be 3-1 in the main event.

Val eventually wins it with a roll up as Yamaguchi continues to say that he’ll never be the same after Raw tomorrow. He’s really short so he gets a lot of jokes for that. Val gets on the mic and says that Yamaguchi is small and his wife says so.

Rating: B. This was a very decent match as both guys can really go in the ring when they’re given the chance. Val was the hot shot rookie and he showed why he was here. He had a nice variety of offense, a very unique gimmick a good look, size, strength and agility. Put him in there with a good technician like Jarrett and how could this be bad?

We see a shot of the Hart Family Dungeon where there will be a match tonight.

D’lo Brown vs. X-Pac

This is just a continuation of the DX/NOD feud but the real match would have been later tonight between Rock and HHH in an Iron Man match. Brown beat HHH for the European Title on Monday for no apparent reason as the Iron Man was supposed to be title vs. title. I was at a house show the Friday before that Raw so 10 days before this where D’lo was already billed as champion despite not winning the title until three days later.

Kama is now the Godfather of the Nation and is dressing like a pimp. This is non title for no good reason. There’s a bikini contest tonight with Sable and Jackie so King simply will not shut up about it. Other than that, this match is painfully boring. I can’t stand X-Pac but this is just bad no matter who is in it. The crowd is completely dead and in a ten minute match you should not need three rest holds. Godfather interferes and D’Lo hits the Sky High for the pin.

Rating: D. This was a very boring match. It wasn’t any good at all and while I can’t put the blame on either guy more than the other, I’m going to blame X-Pac because I hate that little bastard. This really was just a bad match and the non-title didn’t help it. It just gave us even less of a reason to care here so why should this be any good at all?

Apparently the Undertaker isn’t here yet.

Farrooq/Scorpio vs. Terry Funk/Bradshaw

Anyone that can find the point to this match will receive a free ham sandwich. As the other team heads to the ring, Funk says that this will be his last match in the WWF for at least six months, thereby ticking off Bradshaw. From what I can find, this wasn’t actually told to Bradshaw until just then so his reaction was legit. It pretty much left him without anything to do but he and Farrooq would join up around November.

The amazing part is that Funk actually did leave after this and wasn’t seen on a mainstream show until he showed up in WCW about two years later. The main thing here is all about Taker not showing up yet and Funk leaving soon. Other than that, this match is bad. The fans agree apparently as they start the boring chant which is actually acknowledged.

It’s just nothing of note at all here with a powerslam by Farrooq when Bradshaw jumps from the ropes being the only thing decent at all. Funk won’t tag out and in the big brawl Scorpio pins him after a 450. Bradshaw then beats all three of them up as he turns heel.

Rating: D. This was just bland as heck and no one was interested at all. It would have been fine on Raw I guess, but this had no business being on a PPV. The wrestling wasn’t that good, there was no story or build and no one really seemed to care that a 54 year old man was leaving. Can you blame them really?

Vader vs. Mark Henry

Apparently they had a tug of war or something on Shotgun Saturday Night which is a show I should review in a lot more detail someday. I just do not get what Vince’s problem is. Mark Henry is described by JR as still being raw and a rookie when he’s been in the company and a professional for over two years at this point. Vader has been a three time world champion in WCW.

The crowd is chanting VADER for the majority of the match. So how does the booking go of course? Henry gets his head handed to him for the majority of the match and hits two moves to win it. He kicks out of a move that more or less is the Vader Bomb, hits a bad powerslam and a splash to win it. WHAT THE HECK IS YOUR PROBLEM VINCE MCMAHON???

Why in the world would you not push a guy like Vader but have Mark freaking Henry still be a big deal? It’s been 13 years and he’s the same worker he was back then. Why in the world was he kept around when he gets hurt every five minutes while Vader is getting cheers but can’t keep a job?

Vader is clearly getting in better shape too as he’s visibly not as fat but more muscular and maybe a hair faster, while Henry’s chest looks rather horrible. Seriously, Vince needs to get his head some fresh air.

Rating: C. Vader of course does all the work and makes Henry’s level of suck reach only that of a vacuum and not a tornado. Henry botched a slam at the beginning of this match. Do you realize how difficult it is to botch a slam? It’s the most basic move there is after a punch. The sad thing is he could still botch it today and likely has. This just had me shaking my head and making me a bit angry. There was no sense at all to do this to Vader.

The Outlaws say they’ll be watching this next match closely.

LOD vs. DOA

Dang was there a spelling bee coming up with all of these abbreviations or something? Anyway, this is the convergence of two storylines in one as Paul Ellering, LOD’s mentor and the only person that’s ever been able to control them left them for the DOA a few weeks ago.

This was combined with the beginning of Hawk’s alcoholism storyline which evolved into a drug problem which evolved into him falling off of the top of the big screen one night which evolved into a storyline that a lot of people got a bad taste in their mouths because of. It just never felt right. Once again, Vince runs down another very over team in exchange for a copy of them, in this case the DOA. Anyway, this one is short and we don’t really see any effect of Hawk’s “condition.”

It’s fast for the most part with a standard tag team formula of faces dominate, heels take over, hot tag, finish. There’s nothing wrong with that and it works pretty well here. Animal even uses a dropkick and a pretty good one at that. He always was the more polished of the two. Anyway, the finish here is fairly simple: switch after the Doomsday Device leads to the pin. The main thing here was DOA’s manager being crazy according to Ross, but he really just acts like a normal heel manager. There’s nothing really all that crazy about him when you watch this match, so I guess there was a promo or something like that where his craziness was more explained. Either way, this was what you would expect from two teams like this.

Rating: B. Not bad but given the four guys out there, this was as good as it was going to get. Hawk gets beat up, tags Animal who cleans house, and then since the LOD was dominant in the 80s, Vince says screw you to the fans and pushes another team to the moon who never did anything in the company.

Dungeon Match: Owen Hart vs. Ken Shamrock

This is in the famous Hart Family Dungeon for absolutely no reason at all. In something else that there’s no point to, Dan Severn, Shamrock’s UFC rival is the referee. He wrestled as the NWA Champion forever and has a four year reign to his credit, but it was during the time when the company was completely dead. He was at an MMA tournament in Japan when he was called on to defend the title at a PPV called TNA.

He had to forfeit and Shamrock became the first TNA Champion. Anyway, Owen and Shamrock are apparently feuding so we’re having a match in Owen’s basement. This seriously looks like a homemade wrestling project that would be thrown on YouTube or something. Severn just leaning against the window when Shamrock makes his entrance amuses me for some reason. Anyway, this is submission only.

This looks dangerously close to a shoot with how hard they’re hitting each other in there. You get some very stiff shots into the wooden walls and they use the water pipe to get in the air. I’m really not sure if this is terrible or awesome. Anyway, they beat on each other for a bit until Owen, and I wish I was making this up, lifts Shamrock into the air and his head goes through the ceiling.

Anyone else thing that just sounds funny? Anyway, they brawl a bit more but Shamrock kicks Severn in the head, allowing Owen to grab a dumbbell and smash Shamrock in the head. He locks on a crossface and then taps Shamrock for him as Severn is waking up to declare Owen the winner. Owen goes through the dungeon (which is one room) and into the garage to leave. This didn’t last five minutes.

Rating: C. I gave it a C because I have no idea what to say about this. It was a cross between wrestling, UFC and backyard fighting. The whole thing was meant I think as just a way to have a novelty but it was somewhere in between sweet and terrible. Really just a weird thing.

In the back, Vince says that he has a replacement partner in case Taker doesn’t show up: Brooklyn Brawler.

Recap of HHH vs. Rock, which was supposed to be title for title as previously mentioned.

IC Title: HHH vs. Rock

This is two out of three falls. One thing I’ve never liked about 2/3 falls: pretty much whoever wins the first fall should be the champion shouldn’t they, at least if it’s by pin or submission? I mean, they beat the champion in a title match in a way by which the title can change hands. Also, for some reason I love HHH’s tights here.

This is yet again a match where DX and the Nation are there and have no real point of being there other than to act as a bunch of seconds. After the 37 other people clear out of the ring it’s time to get going. Slaughter sends off a bunch of people and only lets Chyna stay out there because she has a legit manager’s license. I’d love to take that test.

Crotch chop by HHH and it’s on. We have a thirty minute time limit which is likely going to come into play here. Chyna drills Rock behind the referee’s back as you can tell they’re in for a long one here. We brawl up the aisle a bit and HHH controls. Jerry asks an interesting question: if they’re both counted out is that one fall apiece or just the first fall?

Game gets sent into the steps and Rock starts dominating. The fans think Rocky Sucks. Back in the ring the momentum changes again. These two are far better at emitting emotion in a match than most guys are today. You get the feeling that this could end at anytime rather than just killing time until the finish.

With Rock distracting the referee Mark Henry comes down and splashes HHH. Billy Gunn comes out for the save and Henry heads to the back. Rock gets a belt shot for two. We hit a chinlock as Rock gets to run some time off. All Rock at this point. Dang Rock looks like he’s roided up something huge here. I mean he’s always been a big guy but he looks muscular here.

Back to that chinlock as we’re probably about 15 minutes into this. HHH gets some comeback offense in and hits the knee to the face. Rock grabs him and throws him at the top rope for a hot shot. Here comes Godfather but the Outlaws run out before he can even make it to the mats at ringside.

Rock keeps shoving the referee but it’s a distraction so that D’Lo can come in with the European Title but HHH stops him. He walks into a Rock Bottom to make it 1-0 Rock though. We have a one minute rest period now. Rock beats him up for awhile but gets sent into the railing. He pops off of that and KILLS Rock with a clothesline.

People’s Elbow hits as Brown is getting back up for two. HHH gets a big clothesline and both guys are down. We’re under 10 minutes to go here and Brown is getting back up. Chyna takes him out and while she’s being reprimanded, X-Pac runs down for an X Factor for two. Rock brings in a chair but accidentally pops the referee with it.

With no referee Chyna runs in for a low blow and a DDT on a chair. You might notice the high level of the term RUN-IN here. That evens us at one fall with about 5 minutes to go. After the rest period other referees have come out to help their fallen official so there’s no referee there. We only have two minutes left.

HHH gets all fired up as Hebner is here now. Facebuster sets up the 6th crotch chop and a big clothesline for two at a minute left. Samoan Drop puts HHH down for two as they were moving there for a bit.

They slug it out and Rock sets for the Rock Bottom but HHH counters into a SWEET Pedigree as the time is up. Oh man the fans are not happy. The Nation and DX come out for the big beatdown. HHH would get one last shot at the title in August at Summerslam and to say it blows this away is an understatement.

Rating: C+. I HATE the ending here. Who in the world books a 2/3 falls match to end in a time limit? That makes absolutely no sense at all to me. They’re getting close to the big blowoff to this match next month which is light years ahead of this, so this was fine I guess. It kept us from having a definitive end to the feud and it makes HHH’s win next month all the sweeter because we now know he can beat the Rock.

The main issue here is the amount of run-ins. Everybody comes in and the announcement of the time limit at the start more or less gave it away. This feud was the one that made both of these guys stars but it is NOTHING compared to what they would do two years later. I can’t wait to get to that iron man match.

Bikini Contest: Sable vs. Jackie

See, I told you Sable would be back. Before this starts, Dustin Rhodes comes out and leads us in a prayer, asking for forgiveness for those that watch what’s coming. This was a really weird period in his career that he was more or less a preacher. He would eventually start saying He is coming back, inferring Jesus but of course meaning Goldust.

Lawler is your moderator of this. Jackie is the annoying woman that allegedly is hot but no one else has ever seemed to see that in her. She’s with Mero now and no one could care less. She’s in a robe, Sable is in a t-shirt. Jackie goes first and has a red one piece on that’s more or less a pair of suspenders. Definite nip slip here as it’s easily visible and she covers it up after she’s done dancing badly.

Sable takes hers off and has on a half shirt and a thong. She says that Vince, who apparently is the way she got back into the company, said she should wear something more conservative. I think that was supposed to be a kind of sleeping with the boss story or at least an implied one but nothing ever came of it.

Anyway, she says it’s live TV and there’s nothing Vince can do so she pulls her half shirt off to reveal painted handprints with pasties over the nipples. Of course she wins and of course Vince comes and covers her up with his coat. The next night they reversed it, saying that wasn’t a bikini because we have to waste some time on all Raws.

Rating: F. This was freaking stupid and not even a decent contest. This was just bad.

Recap of the main event feud that is complicated to say the least. It was Russo’s magnum opus as it was a year long storyline that culminated with the swerve to end all swerves as Vince goes so far as to terrorize his own family due to his obsession with making Austin’s life a nightmare.

That would come later though as at the moment the main story was that Vince, Taker and Kane were part of a conspiracy against Austin. This started because Austin hit Taker with a chair by mistake when Taker was trying to help Austin against Kane and Mankind. After that Taker was seen going into his own locker room with Kane standing in it. That led to the theory that Taker was in on it.

Tag Titles: Taker/Austin vs. Mankind/Kane

The heels won the titles from the Outlaws on Raw a few weeks ago. Taker comes out to new music after getting there twenty minutes ago apparently. This is exactly what you would expect from a main event tag match with these four, but it’s given nearly half an hour. All four guys beat on each other and the tension between Austin and Taker is clear. They brawl on the floor, in the ring and all over the place.

It’s very hard to comment on a match like this because the first 15-20 minutes or so are just what you would expect in a match like this with very little of note. Austin keeps hitting stunners but there are kickouts every time or someone interferes. It’s a good match, but I really don’t get why the titles had to be involved.

Putting two guys that are big singles stars as tag champions rarely if ever works and it didn’t here, as the faces win but lost them back I think either the next night or 8 days later. Taker wins it with a tombstone on Kane.

Rating: B+. This was fine, but it made no sense to change the titles back so fast. It was Russo 101 to make them just a prop, which I’ve always hated deeply. Seriously, what’s the point in just making the belts a thing to advance a storyline? They should be on the top tag team, which they did about two weeks later when the Outlaws got them back. The wrestling was top quality with four great workers in there at the top of their game. Great match, but I’m not wild on the storyline.

Overall Rating: D+. This show is bad. There are two matches on it worth anything and one is a horrible ending. The main event is solid but it certainly can’t save the show. Aside from that and the opening match, the show is just a waste. Nothing of note happens and the two good matches certainly can’t save it.

The rest of the card is just random filler that few cared about. It would get a lot better soon though as the real glory days of the Attitude Era were on the horizon. Skip this for sure though and go grab Summerslam which is light years better and a very solid show.

 

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Monday Night Raw
Date: July 6, 1998
Location: Bryce Jordan Center, State College, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Another day another Raw. With three weeks to go before Fully Loaded we have more conspiracy stuff to get to. Austin won the title back last week so there’s also likely to be fallout from that. Also we’ll of course have more DX vs. the Nation stuff as that feud is going to take awhile to get through. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap video of last week’s events.

Here’s Undertaker to open the show. He says he wants a title shot and he wants it right now. We cut to the back where Cole is looking for Austin. JR says Austin is here somewhere. There he is and he doesn’t want to talk. Here’s Austin who gets in the ring. Taker gets ready but Vince cuts them off. He says that he picks the opponents and times when Austin defends the title. However since they both want it, he’ll make it happen, but at Fully Loaded. It won’t be a one on one match though. It’ll be them teaming up against Kane/Mankind. The #1 contender will be named tonight as well. Vince flips Austin off.

Brawl For All First Round: Brakkus vs. Savio Vega

Brakkus is a big German muscle man. Savio gets in some good shots in the first round but it’s tied up because of a takedown. Brakkus is totally gassed after round two. Savio wins via points or decision or however you win these things. Brakkus has a broken nose.

Jeff Jarrett vs. Ken Shamrock

Shamrock easily sends him to the floor to start. Jarrett comes back in with a top rope cross body but Shamrock rolls through it for two. Edge is in the crowd. Out to the floor and Jarrett throws him into the steps. Jeff takes over and hooks a sleeper. Belly to back breaks whatever momentum Shamrock was getting going. Shamrock starts his comeback and hits a powerslam. A belly to back suplex gets two when King Mabel of all people runs in and splashes Shamrock.

Rating: D. Boring match but it was only here for the ending. Mabel would be here for one night only and would face Shamrock later in the night, which is why things were so short. I don’t think anyone wanted to see Mabel and I don’t think most people remembered him, but either way it’s just one night and the King of the Ring angle was something for Shamrock to do for awhile.

Vader vs. Bradshaw

Outlaws vs. Kane/Mankind for the titles next week. What exactly are you expecting here? They’re big, they’re strong, they hit each other a lot. Vader fires off headbutts in the corner and goes up but jumps into a powerslam. And here are Kane and Mankind to beat them both up for the double DQ. The big guys leave the lesser big guys laying.

Disciples of Apocalypse vs. Headbangers

Please be a squash. The Headbangers pour hot candle wax on themselves on the way to the ring. Ellering is with the DOA here and sends them right after the Headbangers. Mosh vs. let’s say 8-Ball to start. Ellering says the wind was blowing towards the DOA so he went with them. The LOD took their talent and became prisoners of their own memories. Thrasher gets two on a cross body. Off to Skull and Mosh and the Headbangers do their…whatever that is that they do. Stage Dive is broken up and the DOA hits something like a spike belly to back suplex to pin Thrasher.

Rating: D. This was basically a squash but at least it wasn’t against the LOD. Those matches were simply awful so of course they would go on for months. Not much here and the Headbangers weren’t going to be anything pretty much ever again. Not horrible, but there’s only so much this could be.

D-Lo Brown vs. Terry Funk

Brown has the chest protector. Terry takes him to the mat easily but D-Lo gets him into the corner and splashes him with the chest protector. Terry tries to chop him but can’t due to the protector. Instead he punches Brown in the face and piledrives him. A Downward Spiral takes Brown down and they go to the floor. Terry tries an Asai Moonsault but partially hits the railing. Back in and Terry thinks enough to put Brown on his stomach for the moonsault so that it hurts. Brown goes to the apron and Godfather hits Funk with some jewelery. The Low Down ends it.

Rating: D+. I love Terry Funk more and more every time I see him. He does crazy stuff but he has some of the most entertaining matches on Raw every week. Good stuff here and the beginning of one of Brown’s long running gimmicks. That nagging injury angle could work today if someone would think to use it.

Undertaker comes out and chokeslams everyone, including Terry, basically becoming a tweener.

Here’s Vince to announce the #1 contender. We’ll get to the announcement in a bit but first let’s bring some people out. First up, Mankind. Now Kane. Finally it’s Undertaker. Vince talks about everyone and why they could be #1 contender. Mankind took a horrible beating at King of the Ring, Kane was a great champion but was also a very stupid person, and Taker Vince isn’t sure on.

Is it because he’s done evil things to the other candidates? Is it because he thinks he’s as good as Austin? Or is it something else? Either way, we’ll find out who the #1 contender is tonight in a triple threat match.

Brawl For All First Round: Hawk vs. Darren Drozdov

Hawk looks very stupid in wrestling gear and boxing gloves. They lumber around for the first round and this needs to end already. I mean the whole competition mind you. Hawk gets knocked backwards in the second. Nothing happens in the third round and it’s a draw. Droz would advance because Hawk was hurt.

Here are Mero and Jackie. The fans chant for Sable and Jackie says she’s here to talk. She blames herself for Mero losing the fight because she wore him out. Apparently Sable couldn’t satisfy him. Here’s Sable who says Marc couldn’t do anything. Sable implies Jackie is a rather loose woman, so Jackie wants a bikini contest. Ok then.

Val Venis vs. Dustin Runnels

Val’s pre match thing is about Joe Paterno. Dustin prays a bit. Val takes over quickly and hits a running knee in the corner. He goes up for punches but gyrates in Dustin’s face, resulting in an atomic drop. Val takes over again and hooks a full nelson with his legs on Dustin. Dustin comes back with a Russian legsweep but here’s Kai En Tai for the DQ.

Yamaguchi gets on the mike and threatens Val. His wife can’t stop looking at Venis.

And now for the famous part of the show: the DX parody of the Nation. We have HHH as the Crock, Road Dogg as B-Lo, X-Pac as Mizark, Billy as Godfather and a guy named Jason Sensation as Owen. Billy says random things and hands the mic to HHH. He has an eyebrow painted on his forehead and talks about what he was cooking in the bathroom. Roadie repeats everything and then shakes his head. Crock sets for a People’s Elbow on B-Lo but stops mid-leg turn to talk about how when he hits Rock Bottom with the ladies, he has to lay the Smackdown on himself.

B-Lo of course runs to the corner and shakes his head after repeating everything Crock said. Jason Sensation (in a PERFECT Owen voice) says that he looks like a road sign. He wanted to be tough, but he couldn’t grow his beard in. He’s a black Hart, a winner and a soul survivor WOO! And if anyone smells what the Rock is cooking, it’s him. Look how big his nose is. What is he, an aardvark. WOO!

Mizark wants to know what Rock is cooking, because hey hey hey, it smells like crap. B-Lo is finally told to shut up. Now shut your mouths and know your roles, because Nation, we got two words for you: WATCH THIS. This is still absolutely hilarious and had me cracking up. It’s on a WWE DVD somewhere I’m sure.

Mabel vs. Ken Shamrock

Mabel goes after the ribs and hits a backbreaker. Shamrock hammers on him but a corner splash misses. A middle rope elbow can’t drop the monster and neither can a leg lariat. World’s Strongest Slam puts Ken down but a middle rope clothesline misses and the ankle lock ends this quick. Not long enough to rate but this was no surprise at all.

Shamrock won’t let go of the hold and snaps again.

Here are Vince and Bearer to watch the triple threat. Austin joins them. It’s Austin and Vince on commentary.

Undertaker vs. Mankind vs. Kane

Winner is #1 contender. And there’s no Undertaker. The arena has Kane’s red lights in it. Vince gets off commentary and says it’s now one on one and no holds barred. We’ll throw in falls count anywhere in the building too. Mankind sits on the floor in front of the steps. He says he’s given enough and he’s not giving for Vince anymore. Mankind isn’t going to fight his friend Kane. Vince says ring the bell and we have like 2 minutes left. Kane stands in the ring as Vince yells to get going. Kane goes to the floor, cracks Mankind in the head with the chair and becomes #1 contender.

Kane rips off the mask to reveal the Undertaker, who is now #1 contender, end of show. This was done perfectly. Kane had been wearing the two sleeved outfit for a few weeks so it wasn’t out of the ordinary to see him in that. The red light keeps you from being able to see details of Taker, and therefore it probably fooled a lot of people. Very well done and I was shocked when I was ten.

Overall Rating: C. This show is very indicative of what the Attitude Era’s problem is: it doesn’t age well at all. The problem is that when you have a show that is totally built around drama and who knows what and who is really with who, it’s very entertaining to watch week to week. Watching it later, you realize that it’s not the best TV. The difference between this and Nitro is on Nitro, there was a ton of drama, but it resulted in stuff in the ring week to week. Now Raw did that too, but it resulted in great stuff in the ring on the PPVs, which means the TV can be kind of boring to sit through.

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