Impact Wrestling – July 8, 2021: He Needs A Better Bat

Impact Wrestling
Date: July 8, 2021
Location: Skyway Studios, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D’Lo Brown

We’re almost up to Slammiversary and that means it is time for the final push towards the show. The Elite got to stand tall at the end of last week’s show but they are going to have to get what is coming to them sooner rather than later. It wouldn’t surprise me to see them lose a bit of ground here, but you never can tell with them. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Kenny Omega and Don Callis are here for the contract signing between Omega and Sami Callihan, who doesn’t have them worried.

Opening sequence.

Brian Myers vs. Jake Something

The loser has to admit the other is a professional and Sam Beale is here with Myers. Something slugs away to start and they’re on the floor in a hurry with Myers being sent face first into the steps. They head back inside where Myers is clotheslined straight back to the floor in a hurry.

This time Myers gets in a shot of his own, setting up a suplex onto the ramp. Josh: “Jake Something experiencing what it is like to get suplexed onto the ramp. You fans can experience what it is like to see Impact Wrestling live!” Points for a good transition. Beale gets in a cheap shot from the floor but Something is back with a powerbomb. Myers grabs a DDT for two and goes up top for the elbow and a rather near fall. The Roster Cut is countered into the swinging Black Hole Slam to give Something the fast win at 5:19.

Rating: C. Ignoring the stupid Something name, this could have been worse and the ending was clean. It had a personal story behind it and that is about all you can ask for in something like this. They only had about five minutes so they did what they could, which is a little bit more than I was expecting.

Post match Something tells Myers to say it but Myers stalls until Beale can get in a cheap shot. Matt Cardona comes in for the save, likely setting up the tag match.

Here’s what’s coming tonight.

Deonna Purrazzo is ready to keep the Knockouts Title without Kimber Lee and Susan. She is so confident that it’s open challenge time. I still need a moratorium on those things already.

Sami Callihan is ready for the contract signing when he is arrested for assaulting Don Callis. Sami: “I DID NOTHING THIS TIME!!!”

Knockouts Title: Deonna Purrazzo vs. ???

Purrazzo is defending against….the debuting Lady Frost (Dave Penzer: “From somewhere cold!”). Purrazzo doesn’t seem overly intimidated and takes Frost into the corner to stomp away. A roundhouse kick takes Purrazzo down but Frost misses a moonsault, injuring her ankle in the process. With Frost down, the Fujiwara armbar makes her tap at 2:35.

Post match Purrazzo calls Frost another brick in the age of the Virtuosa. She is the greatest Knockouts Champion of all time but here is Gail Kim to interrupt. Kim is here to talk about Slammiversary but she is NOT challenging for the title. Instead, Kim and Scott D’Amore have found a challenger for the title at Slammiversary and Purrazzo isn’t finding out until the show. Be ready for the fight of your life.

Flashback Moment of the Week: Mickie James retains the Knockouts Title over Angelina Love at Slammiversary 2011.

Chris Sabin comes in to the empty Swinger’s Palace but Johnny Swinger isn’t there. Sabin asks one of the Swingerellas about her cat’s surgery but here’s Moose to jump both Sabin and Hernandez.

Chris Bey has made his decision about his side in the X-Division war, but he isn’t friends with anyone on his side.

W. Morrissey vs. Jason Page/Manny Smith/Deontay Evans

Before the match, Morrissey accepts Eddie Edwards’ challenge for Slammiversary and promises to demonstrate what is coming for him. Clotheslines and splashes set up a chokeslam and a powerbomb to put all three down at once. The release F5 lets Morrissey stack them up for the pin at 1:54. Well that was effective.

Video on the Knockouts division and how awesome the whole group is.

Don Callis is rather serious about the assault and isn’t taking this lightly. He even has footage of what happened and we see “Callihan” (mostly from behind and with his face covered) hitting him. Scott D’Amore says the contract signing is taking place tonight anyway.

Susan/Kimber Lee vs. Rosemary/Havok

Susan panics at having to start with Rosemary and it’s off to Havok for a double clothesline. Lee comes in and hammers away to no avail before being screamed down. Havok tosses Lee around with ease so Rosemary comes back in. This time Lee actually manages to do something of her own, with a series of kicks to the head. Susan and Lee start taking turns on Rosemary in the corner, which lasts all of ten seconds before she gets away for the tag off to Havok. Everything breaks down and Havok knocks Lee off the top to the floor. Rosemary spears Susan for the pin at 4:11.

Rating: D+. Remember when Susan was Su Yung, the indestructible monster of the division? Well now she’s losing in a mostly one sided tag match in about four minutes. At least they turned her into some kind of a joke with the pants suit, because that’s what you should do with someone as unique and talented as Yung. As usual, this company makes some really strange choices from time to time.

We go to the locker room for It’s All About Me, with Jazz (in a Shad Gaspard shirt) as this week’s guest. She gets to ask Tenille Dashwood a question, but Dashwood asks her about Rachael Ellering and Jordynne Grace’s instead. With that not working, Kaleb With A K asks what it means for Dashwood, who blames Jazz for everything falling apart. Dashwood thinks that sounds like Jazz’s career before backing away. Jazz gets shoved into the camera to wrap it up.

Post break, Grace and Ellering come in to check on Jazz. Revenge is sworn, with Ellering not being happy with Jazz being treated like this. Seems like a mixed tag is set for next week.

Here are Rich Swann and Willie Mack for a chat. Swann talks about how they like to fight straight up but Violent By Design jumped them last week. The challenge is sent out for the Tag Team Title shot but TJP and Fallah Bahh interrupt instead. The line starts behind them in the same promo you’ve heard a hundred times. Cue Violent By Design for the showdown but the Good Brothers come in as well, with both guys talking about how great they are in a southern preacher style. Cue Tommy Dreamer to announce a four way tag at Slammiversary. Great. Speaking of great, it’s time for a four way.

Deaner vs. Rich Swann vs. TJP vs. Karl Anderson

We start fast after with the partners on the floor and everyone else brawling inside. Swann and TJP are left alone in the ring and it’s time to start running the ropes in a hurry. TJP gets sent outside but Deaner is right there to jump Swann from behind. The chinlock goes on but here is TJP to kick Deaner down in the corner. Deaner reverses and hits a running dropkick to drive TJP’s neck into the corner for two. Back up and TJP sends Deaner and Anderson to the floor, only to be sent outside by Swann. That means a huge flip dive from Swann and we take a break.

Back with Swann running into Deaner’s knee to the ribs as Anderson gets back in. Deaner jumps him rather than agreeing to an alliance before Swann is back in. Everyone knocks each other down until TJP kicks Anderson into the corner for the boot wash. The Detonation Kick is blocked but so is the Gun Stun, leaving TJP to hit the Detonation Kick on Anderson. The Mamba Splash misses though and a Deaner DDT gets two on Swann. TJP is sent outside, leaving Anderson to Gun Stun Deaner for the pin at 13:21.

Rating: C+. The match was as energetic as you would have expected, despite one of the Good Brothers winning to make me roll my eyes. I’m not expecting them to get a title shot but there is always that chance. That alone should be a scary thought and I’m not sure what to expect at Slammiversary.

Post match the Good Brothers have their big staredown with Violent By Design, with everyone else getting involved.

Kimber Lee has a backup plan for Susan, revealing James Mitchell (yeah he’s great but HOW MANY TIMES ARE WE GOING TO DO THIS THING), who is going to help things out.

Slammiversary rundown.

Video on Kenny Omega vs. Sami Callihan.

Scott D’Amore is in the ring for the Omega vs. Callihan contract signing. Since there is no Callihan, here are Omega and Don Callis, with the latter bragging about Callihan not being around. D’Amore says they have nine days to get Callihan to sign so Omega signs. The lights go out though and we see footage of Callis being slapped by the fake Callihan and praising him for doing it well.

Cue the real Callihan with the baseball bat to Omega, who is back up nine seconds later for the brawl. Callihan plants him with the package piledriver and then signs the deal. Omega is put through the table to end the show. This was contract signing 101, but if Callihan can’t keep him down for ten seconds with a baseball bat, why bother with the match?

Overall Rating: C-. They did a few things that make me want to see Slammiversary more and that is what matters the most. The wrestling here wasn’t great but it also wasn’t the point of the show. What mattered here was making me want to see the pay per view and job well done enough. The show still isn’t great, but they have found their rhythm and seem to be sticking with it and that’s a good thing.

Results
Jake Something b. Brian Myers – Swinging Black Hole Slam
Deonna Purrazzo b. Lady Frost – Fujiwara armbar
W. Morrissey b. Jason Page/Manny Smith/Deontay Wilder – Triple pin
Rosemary/Havok b. Susan/Kimber Lee – Spear to Susan
Karl Anderson b. Rich Swann, Deaner and TJP – Gun Stun to Deaner

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania XXVI (2015 Redo): Goodbye And Thank You

Wrestlemania XXVI
Date: March 28, 2010
Location: University of Phoenix Stadium, Glendale, Arizona
Attendance: 72,219
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Matt Striker

Pre-Show: Battle Royal

Mark Henry, Shad Gaspard, JTG, Goldust, Yoshi Tatsu, Santino Marella, Primo, Kung Fu Naki, Slam Master J., Jimmy Wang Yang, Chris Masters, Vladimir Kozlov, Great Khali, Finlay, William Regal, Luke Gallows, Carlito, Tyler Reks, Zack Ryder, Lance Archer, Mike Knox, Caylen Croft, Trent Barretta, Tyson Kidd, David Hart-Smith, Chavo Guerrero

Primo and J. are sent out in the first thirty seconds but the ring is still really full. Henry puts out the Dudebusters and Chavo, only to get dumped by Khali. As you might expect, a bunch of people get together to put Khali out as well. Cryme Tyme gets together to put out Gallows but Shad eliminates JTG. Things settle down for a change but there are still too many people in there.

Rating: D+. This would be the traditional not great battle royal but it was cool to see someone young getting a win for a change. You could see a lot of new names showing up around the company, though a lot of them really never went anywhere. Unfortunately that would include Tatsu, who never went much higher than this, partially due to ECW not being around to take away some of the roster spots.

We open with another fly over.

Fantasia (from American Idol) sings America the Beautiful.

Tag Team Titles: R-Truth/John Morrison vs. The Miz/Big Show

Video on Wrestlemania week in Phoenix.

Randy Orton vs. Ted DiBiase vs. Cody Rhodes

Kofi Kingston vs. MVP vs. Evan Bourne vs. Jack Swagger vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. Matt Hardy vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Drew McIntyre vs. Kane vs. Christian

Extreme Rules ad.

Sheamus vs. HHH

Two straight Irish Curse backbreakers put HHH down as the match slows a lot. An ax handle gets two and some simple right hands to the face get the same. We hit the chinlock because this is the point in a WWE style match where you would put on a chinlock. After a powerslam, Sheamus grabs an armbar. Dude come on. HHH fights up out of the devastating armbar (because nothing else had been done to his arm) and grabs a DDT.

The high knee and facebuster get two but Sheamus counters the Pedigree into the Brogue Kick for two (of course HHH gets to be one of if not the first person to kick out of it). After the spinebuster sends Sheamus to the apron, another Brogue Kick drops HHH. No cover though as HHH pops up and hits the Pedigree for the pin at 12:10.

CM Punk vs. Rey Mysterio

Punk holds him down with a test of strength grip until Rey fights up and springboards to the top for a moonsault into a DDT (that looked way better than I was expecting). Another moonsault is caught in the GTS (Go To Sleep) but Rey grabs the rope to save himself. Rey kicks him down and tries a frog splash but Punk sits up just in time. Back up and Serena saves Punk from a 619, only to have it connect a few seconds later, setting up the springboard splash for the pin at 6:30.

Bret Hart vs. Vince McMahon

Bret punches it out of his hand though and beats on him for a bit, followed by stomping away at the “lower abdomen”. Someone throws Bret a chair so he can have a seat for a bit. Bret beats on him with the chair for a good while and Vince appears to be in shock. The Sharpshooter finally makes Vince tap at 11:09.

Rating: A. This was all it needed to be and exactly what people were expecting. Neither guy is a wrestler anymore so having the Hart Family, especially Kidd and Hart-Smith, helped a good bit. There was never any doubt as to what this was going to be and while it went a bit longer than it needed to, it did everything it needed to.

Wrestlemania XXVII is in Atlanta. Cole promises a great guest host.

The attendance is 72,219, again not announced as a record.

Smackdown World Title: Chris Jericho vs. Edge

Maryse/Michelle McCool/Alicia Fox/Layla/Vickie Guerrero vs. Eve Torres/Beth Phoenix/Mickie James/Kelly Kelly/Gail Kim

Rating: D. Well at least it was quick. The Divas were in a weird place here as they were trying to find a new top name but everyone was kind of getting lost in the shuffle. Laycool (Layla and Michelle) were trying but they needed some top stars. Kelly eventually became the main star, even though she was just a model who could only kind of work a match. Anyway, this was a nothing match that was only there for the Vickie stuff, which was another problem around this time.

Raw World Title: Batista vs. John Cena

Batista gets into his gloating power offense but Cena grabs a quick suplex to get a breather. An early AA attempt is countered into a DDT for two and now Batista gets his real advantage. We hit the chinlock with a body scissors (Striker: “Look at this potential submission hold!” Just stop. Please.) but Cena fights up and wins a slugout, only to get caught in a neckbreaker. Now we get the real Cena comeback with all his usual stuff, including the STF which sends Batista crawling to the ropes. A quick spear gets two for the champ and both guys are down.

Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels

No DQ and no countout. Shawn just walks down but Undertaker makes his big entrance by rising up through the stage. Shawn breaks up the staredown with a throat slit of his own so Undertaker pounds on him in the corner early. Snake Eyes and the big boot set up Old School but Undertaker might have tweaked his knee. Shawn goes right after the knee to break up a chokeslam and starts in on the arm for some reason. Striker: “Shawn Michaels is very adept at submission grappling.” For the love of all things good and holy will someone SHUT HIM UP???

Ratings Comparison

Awesome Truth vs. ShoMiz

Original: D

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo:

Randy Orton vs. Ted DiBiase vs. Cody Rhodes

Original: D+

2013 Redo: C

Christian vs. Matt Hardy vs. Kane vs. Jack Swagger vs. Kofi Kingston vs. Drew McIntyre vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. MVP vs. Evan Bourne

Original: B

2013 Redo: C+

HHH vs. Sheamus

Original: B-

2013 Redo: C+

CM Punk vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: B-

2013 Redo: C

Mr. McMahon vs. Bret Hart

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A+

Edge vs. Chris Jericho

Original: A-

2013 Redo: B

Beth Phoenix/Kevin Kelly/Mickie James/Gail Kim/Eve Torres vs. Vickie Guerrero/Alicia Fox/Laycool/Maryse

Original: F

2013 Redo: D

John Cena vs. Batista

Original: A

2013 Redo: B+

Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A+

Overall Rating

Original: A

2013 Redo: B+

Dang and I liked it even better on the first view. I might have been closer to right a few years back.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/04/03/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-26-john-cena-vs-batista-do-you-need-more/

And the 2013 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/04/04/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-xxvi-goodbye-mr-wrestlemania/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania XXVI (2013 Redo): The Cube Show

Wrestlemania XXVI
Date: March 28, 2010
Location: University of Phoenix Stadium, Glendale, Arizona
Attendance: 72,219
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Matt Striker

The opening video is about how several long careers have led here. Bret Hart is also back tonight in a match with Vince McMahon. This is one of the first times where there was a big push on the idea of making a Wrestlemania moment.

The theme song is I Made It by Kevin Rudolf. This one really grew on me over the years.

Tag Titles: ShoMiz vs. R-Truth/John Morrison

We look at WWE taking over Phoenix.

Cody Rhodes vs. Randy Orton vs. Ted DiBiase

Orton fights them both off to start before bailing to the floor. This is a glorified handicap match in the early going. Orton gets Rhodes down on the floor and stomps away on DiBiase back inside. Cody gets back in though and the two on one beating is on, drawing really solid heat. Lawler says these stomps are like the ones Orton uses. Uh, yeah King. I can clearly see the similarities in kicking somebody.

Legacy goes at it and brawls to the floor and Orton gets back into things. He takes both guys down with his usual finishing sequence but DiBiase breaks up the RKO on Rhodes. Cody tries a dive but Orton sidesteps it, sending Rhodes into DiBiase. They come back in and walk into a double Elevated DDT, sending Orton into “that place.” With DiBiase watching, Orton Punts Rhodes and then counters Dream Street into the RKO for the pin on Ted.

Kofi Kingston vs. MVP vs. Evan Bourne vs. Jack Swagger vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. Matt Hardy vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Drew McIntyre vs. Kane vs. Christian

Christian and Matt go up but Kofi (in the rare white trunks) makes the save. Ziggler hits a kind of Zig Zag off the ladder to Christian but Kane and MVP get back inside. Things are already really congested here. Kane is put into the corner and has a ladder rammed into his ribs. Kofi stumbles up the ladder and falls onto the steel. Shelton comes in with Paydirt to MVP and loads up the big ladder, only to be stabbed with a ladder by Swagger. Jack winds up inside the ladder and gets speared from either side with the tops of ladders between the rungs of the big ladder by Christian and Matt.

Now the ladders Matt and Christian used are bridged across the top rope like a big cross kind of thing. Matt and Christian climb up while Bourne climbs up the side of the ladder. The ladder Matt is standing on falls out and Bourne kicks Christian down, but instead of GETTING THE CASE, Evan hits the Shooting Star on Christian. Now Matt stops Bourne but Swagger comes up and throws Matt onto the other bridged ladder, leaving everyone down.

MVP and Shelton go up but a rana by Benjamin send both guys out to the floor. Kane is the first person back inside but Ziggler makes the stop. He actually climbs over Kane but the big man shoves the ladder over to make the stop. A chokeslam onto the ladder has Dolph in trouble, much like Kane actually slamming the ladder onto Ziggler so hard he BREAKS THE LADDER. In the creative spot of the night, Kofi picks up the two broken pieces and walks on the like stilts.

We get the Hall of Fame video from last night.

We recap HHH vs. Sheamus. Sheamus was the next big thing in late 2009 and won the WWE Title. HHH beat him inside the Elimination Chamber and Sheamus revealed that he had always wanted to be like HHH. This led to Sheamus attacking HHH over and over again, setting up the obvious match.

HHH vs. Sheamus

We hit an armbar of all things on the Game which shows off how different the skin tones of these guys are. HHH comes back with a belly to back suplex to put both guys down and a DDT for the same. Back up and the high knee sets up the facebuster for two but the Pedigree is countered with a leg trip. They fight to the corner but Sheamus slips between the legs to try the High Cross, only to be countered into the Pedigree. That gets countered as well and the yet to be named Brogue Kick gets two.

Rating: C+. Not bad at all here with Sheamus looking more than good in his first Wrestlemania match. This was a good way to make the pale one look good and the win over HHH the next month at Extreme Rules would make that even better. Sheamus was definitely here to stay which would become very clear in the near future.

CM Punk vs. Rey Mysterio

Rey fights up but gets sent to the apron for a seated senton. A springboard seated senton is caught into a belly to belly and another counter into a rollup gets two. Punk counters a rana by flipping Rey onto his feet and hits the high kick for two. They grab a test of strength grip and Rey climbs the ropes and moonsaults into a DDT for two in a cool spot.

We recap Bret vs. Vince. Do you REALLY need an explanation for this one? Bret returned back in January and Vince kicked him low. Bret wanted a fight and pretended to break his leg in order to get Vince to fight him at Wrestlemania. Vince signed, Bret took the cast off, and the match was made.

Bret Hart vs. Vince McMahon

Bret pounds away to start and stomps away in the corner before sending Vince out to the lumberjacks for a beating. Natalya hits a HARD slap (Striker: “Best of luck in your future endeavors.”) and the beating is on. The Hart Dynasty hits a Hart Attack to the floor as Bret looks on approvingly. Back in and Bret goes after the leg which knocks Vince back to the floor. He finds a wrench or something from somewhere which sends the Harts away.

Smackdown World Title: Edge vs. Chris Jericho

The real spear charges into a Codebreaker in an AWESOME counter. Since this is Wrestlemania though it only gets two so Jericho goes after the recently repaired ankle. Now the Walls are put on again but Jericho shifts it over to a half crab which is the smart move here. Edge FINALLY makes a rope and even gets a rollup for two. A Cactus Clothesline puts both guys on the floor and as they head back in we lose the referee, allowing Jericho to hit Edge in the head with the belt for two. Not that it matters as the Codebreaker retains the title a few seconds later.

Post match Jericho tries to go after the ankle even more but Edge fights back and puts Jericho on the announce table. With a running start, Edge runs over two announce tables and spears Jericho off the table and through the barricade.

We look at the dark match battle royal, won by Yoshi Tatsu.

Laycool/Vickie Guerrero/Maryse/Alicia Fox vs. Beth Phoenix/Kelly Kelly/Eve Torres/Mickie James/Gail Kim

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Batista

A backdrop finally puts Batista down and there are the shoulder blocks to keep him down. The ProtoBomb sets up the Shuffle but Batista pops up with his spinebuster to plant Cena. The Batista Bomb is countered into the STF though and Batista is in trouble. He finally makes the rope and comes back with a spear for two before sitting Cena on the top. In a cool spot they have a test of strength on the top with Cena slugging Batista down to the mat. Cena busts out a top rope Shuffle but Batista grabs the rope to block the AA.

Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels

You can only win by pin or submission. They stare each other down and Shawn does the throat slit. Taker charges into some chops in the corner but Shawn is thrown into a Flair Flip in the corner, followed by snake eyes and the big boot. Old School is broken up a few times but the third try hits perfectly. The chokeslam is countered and Shawn goes after the leg. A quick Tombstone attempt is blocked and Shawn tries for the Crossface, only to be grabbed by the throat.

Ratings Comparison

Awesome Truth vs. ShoMiz

Original: D

Redo: D+

Randy Orton vs. Ted DiBiase vs. Cody Rhodes

Original: D+

Redo: C

Christian vs. Matt Hardy vs. Kane vs. Jack Swagger vs. Kofi Kingston vs. Drew McIntyre vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. MVP vs. Evan Bourne

Original: B

Redo: C+

HHH vs. Sheamus

Original: B-

Redo: C+

CM Punk vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: B-

Redo: C

Mr. McMahon vs. Bret Hart

Original: A+

Redo: A+

Edge vs. Chris Jericho

Original: A-

Redo: B

Beth Phoenix/Kevin Kelly/Mickie James/Gail Kim/Eve Torres vs. Vickie Guerrero/Alicia Fox/Laycool/Maryse

Original: F

Redo: D

John Cena vs. Batista

Original: A

Redo: B+

Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: A+

Redo: A+

Overall Rating

Original: A

Redo: B+

Dang and I liked it even better on the first view. I might have been closer to right a few years back.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/04/03/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-26-john-cena-vs-batista-do-you-need-more/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania XXVI (Original): I Never Thought I Would See It

Wrestlemania 26
Date: March 29, 2010
Location: University of Phoenix Stadium, Phoenix, Arizona
Attendance: 72,219
Commentators: Matt Striker, Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler
America The Beautiful: Fantasia

Well, here we are. This has been one of the best hyped Manias in a LONG time and I could not wait for what was coming. Seriously, the card looked perfect and just about everyone that mattered was on it. The two biggest stars are fighting for the WWE Title. The Royal Rumble winner is fighting his former partner who turned on him.

Two legends are fighting in a career vs. streak match. This is old school booking at its finest and it’s worked like a charm. Pay attention Vince: keep things simple. Oh and Bret Hart and Vince are going to FINALLY end the Montreal Screwjob after over 12 years. Nothing major though. Let’s get to it.

Fantasia CANNOT SING. It sounds like an elephant stomping on my mother. The opening video is about everyone wanting to have their Wrestlemania moment. That’s the big thing indeed and that’s what it should be about. This is without a doubt the biggest night of the year and as JBL puts it the lights are on bright and everything is right here. That’s what Wrestlemania is all about: everyone wanting to steal the show.

It’s a beautiful thing and when it hits, there is nothing close to it in wrestling. They kind of run down the card without mentioning anything by name. This is really well done. That song I Made It is growing on me rapidly. It makes sense if nothing else so that’s all you need at times. Apparently this place is called the Toaster. Sure why not?

Unified Tag Titles: John Morrison/R-Truth vs. Big Show/Miz

Sweet GOODNESS there are some pretty ladies there. As X said, where are they the rest of the time? Yes, the pyro is cool in slow motion. Dang Miz’s theme music is awesome. Don’t expect a ton of criticism on this show as I thought it was awesome. The jacket on Miz…might be cool. I’m not sure though. I’d love to be the costume master for a company like this. It’s just awesome to get to pick the tights etc for these guys.

Imagine the memories of all of those various props and clothes in there. The ramp is really long so I have time to fill in here. We have a Spanish announce team. That and King being in a tux are nice things to get thrown out once in awhile. Now if only we had some John Wayne cufflinks. The arena looks awesome by the way. Apparently we’re in Romania for the first time ever tonight. Good show to start with I guess. Miz and Morrison start us off.

Morrison does that breakdancing legdrop of his. He’s athletic if nothing else. Show goes for maybe a Vader Bomb but Morrison kicks him in the head. This nearly kills Truth as Show falls backwards. Whose side is Morrison on here? Starship Pain misses. Show catches Truth’s plancha. That’s freaking insane. I mean Truth is a grown man and was coming down at Show. He just caught him. That’s insane. And Morrison goes for a springboard move and gets punched for the pin. What the heck was that?

Rating: D. This felt like about 4 minutes were edited out or something. It came from nowhere and just felt awkward. To be fair though, no one cared about this and it was just a way to get the tag titles on the show. Also, they knew this would be forgotten by the end of the show so why not just get it out of the way?

We recap the events of Mania week and it looks awesome. There was a golf tournament, an art show, and of course Axxess. Blast it looks awesome. Oh and there was a reading challenge too. Can’t beat that.

Randy Orton vs. Ted DiBiase vs. Cody Rhodes

Remember, this is NOT a handicap match. DiBiase has the look far more than Rhodes does and it’s not even close. That could be due to the white boots he’s wearing that make him look like a freaking moron but that could just be me. Orton is WAY over. Thankfully the next night on Raw Vince got the hint and did the full face turn that he had been dying for the past few months. Remember, this is NOT a handicap match.

Everyone throws dropkicks to start. If nothing else Rhodes is cool for the Triforce. Legacy beats up Orton and you know what’s coming. Hey, did you know there are over 70,000 people there? We’re 20 minutes in and we’ve only mentioned that 8 times or so. Didn’t know if it was clear or not. Orton gets a few punches in and the place POPS. They try a leg sweep/clothesline combo but Rhodes completely misses his leg sweep.

Make that a chopblock as I forgot my move names there for a bit. Legacy EXPLODES! Rhodes channels his former jerk…I mean partner, Hardcore Holly, with an Alabama Slam. While DiBiase throws some bad punches at Rhodes, Orton gets up. In the coolest spot of the first hour or so, Orton hits the double DDT on Legacy. That was great , of which both members of Legacy have decent looking ones. Orton humps the mat as usual, waiting on Rhodes to get up.

No RKO though as Orton channels his inner Ray Guy (He’s a punter in the Hall of Fame. How weird does that sound?) and Rhodes is out for good. DiBiase goes for Dream Street but Orton gets a sweet little counter into the RKO and the POP! The fans love this guy to say the least. And we get the sweet pose. Love that thing.

Rating: D+. Not much here, but at the same time they did the right thing. Orton needed to beat these two to put them behind him and move on to a feud with a heel. The RKO got a pop so that’s all that matters. This was exactly what it was supposed to be. Oh and to all you morons that say one of Legacy should have gone over, you’re an idiot.

Don’t try this at home. I mean it. Do it at school or at your aunt’s house. Just DO NOT TO IT AT HOME!

Vickie and her heel Divas talk about their match. I don’t pay attention because Michelle looks good. Jillian comes in to sing and Santino shows up. He bites a Slim Jim and Jillian becomes Mae Young who of course kisses him. Another bite and it’s Mean Gene. Ok that makes things better. One more bite and it’s Melina. Dang that hair is hot.

Money in the Bank

Kofi is out first and is more or less the weakest of the three favorites. His hair looks like a buffalo came in it. He’s wearing white trunks here for some reason. He’s only been qualified for 6 days at this point. MVP is in second. No one cares. At least he’s not in red anymore. Bourne is third so we have our high flier. Three Raw guys so far. Fourth is Swagger to a nice reaction. He debuts the Angle look here and those pushups…don’t appear here.

That sucks because they rock. Shelton is 5th and he belong here. Matt gets a nice pop. Ziggler is in next and I legit forgot he both existed and was in this match. McIntyre, one of the other favorites, has the majority of his entrance cut which sucks. He’s IC Champion here in case you forgot. Kane….you need a better push. Yes I know that’s one of the biggest debates here. Get over it. He has a big black eye which might be from Shawn on Monday.

Christian gets a decent pop as the odds on favorite. There are a ton of ladders and there we go. Drew goes for it maybe 30 seconds in so of course it doesn’t work. In a cool sequence, everyone goes up but everyone else pulls them down. Bourne touches the case and FTS wants to cry. Swagger is in front of the turnbuckle, Matt is in front of him, a ladder is in front of them, Kofi is thrown into the ladder.

That…wouldn’t hurt as much as it would seem to. Ziggler almost gets there but we remember he’s Dolph Ziggler so we know it’s not ending yet. Kane powerbombs Kofi onto a ladder. Freaking OW. I’m not sure if I like the ten men or not. On one hand, it keeps things from being all boring and whatnot as you have someone getting hurt and then others coming back and then repeat. On the other hand, yeah right. Striker says some people think Swagger can carry the WWE. HA!

In a cool spot (shocking I know) there’s a ladder in the ring and Swagger is under it. Matt and Christian have a ladder each and ram it through the rungs to spear Swagger with it. I like that. Bourne and Christian fight on the ladder that’s bridged between the rope and the ladder in the middle like a scaffold. Bourne knocks Christian down and like an IDIOT hits a shooting star press onto Christian. Yeah he deserves to get beaten here.

Matt takes a front flip onto the scaffold ladder. Yeah he’s broken SMACK DAB IN HALF! Sorry the Oklahoma guy got me there for a minute. Naturally this is a spotfest, but what did you really expect? Kane gets a BIG pop when he makes a save. He throws a ladder at Ziggler which is freaking cool looking. Dolph gets put between a ladder and gets worn out with it. Yep it’s broken. Trouble in Paradise puts Kane down.

In a BRILLIANT spot, Kofi takes the two pieces of the ladder and walks from the corner to the middle using them as stilts. That’s AWESOME. That is why these matches stay awesome: making new spots like that. Drew makes the save but Matt stops him. I would have bet on that being the ending. Matt stays up there FOREVER but can’t get the thing off. That’s just idiotic but whatever. Seriously, he has like 5 chances to get it and doesn’t do it.

Matt: YOU ARE AN IDIOT! Christian takes him down with the reverse DDT so Cole says it was a Twist of Fate. Yeah, the hint would be that Christian is ok. Swagger is back now and it’s him vs. Christian.

Swagger puts Christian down…and fiddles with the case…and fiddles with it…and writes the great American novel…and WINS THE THING. THAT is your Mania shocker right there. No one, and I mean NO ONE saw this one coming. Match felt short, which you’ll hear a lot more tonight. Had to pause there. Norcal’s explosion is still giving us tremors.

Rating: B. This would start at a B in case you were wondering. These matches are ones that you can’t grade like a normal match based on the amount of people and the gimmick involved in them. While not as good as some of the others, the idea is cool.

Naturally WWE is going to have a PPV about it instead of letting it be a Mania exclusive but that’s their idiocy for you. Swagger winning is a legit shock though so I can complain about that one at all. Solid stuff though but I could have gone for more people in the ring at once and more spots.

Ad for Extreme Rules.

Hall of Fame time, and for once the class is AWESOME. When Mad Dog Vachon is the worst wrestler and smallest star, that’s saying A LOT. Gorgeous George’s wife is awesome. I want to see Uecker’s speech. That could be hilarious. Ted DiBiase is the best heel of all time. End of argument. Yes that includes Hogan and Flair. That laugh is just amazing.

FINK!!! He brings out the Class of 2010. The entire Hart Family represents Stu. I want to punch Bruce in the face.

We recap HHH vs. Sheamus. This was almost the world title match but they woke up and realized it should be a regular match which I can more than live with. Apparently Sheamus is jealous of HHH. That makes sense. I’d be jealous of his wife if nothing else. HHH eliminated him at Elimination Chamber to really set this up. We get Ultimate Warrior clips. That’s saying a lot.

Sheamus vs. HHH

The view from the top of the stadium with the tiny ring in there is awesome looking. They say no one has had a first year in WWE like Sheamis has. That’s true. When Lesnar did three times what Sheamus did in one year, it was WWF still. HHH gets a nice pop but it doesn’t hold up that long. Ok I’m wrong on that one. HHH has made Wrestlemania? Not sure on that one. HHH looks a tad chubby here. Maybe that’s just me. Ok the entrance is still cool.

He looks like a huge star and he’s supposed to. Talk about a contrast of skin tones here. HHH goes for a Pedigree about a minute in. That’s credited to Mania experience. Uh, why? Isn’t that called going for a finisher early? I’d want to do that in any match. Since HHH got big in the Attitude Era, we hit the floor. The figure four goes on and Flair is reference. Does that make AJ and HHH some kind of brothers? Ok, we get it: HHH is a veteran.

Oh and he’s the Ace of Spades now. What the heck does that even mean? Sheamus likes to yell when he kicks people. It’s rather annoying. Stop it. DO YOU HEAR ME YOU MILKY SKINNED IMBECILE??? Hey that actually worked. He channels his inner British Bulldog and hits a running powerslam. Nothing wrong with that. HHH breaks the momentum with a DDT. That might not work due to that hair though.

Striker: Tie your mother down, here comes HHH. So Striker has random shouts of incestuous bondage. Right. We get a nice finisher reversal sequence that ends with Sheamus hitting the bicycle kick. He gets another after HHH kicks out but both guys are down. Isn’t that a witch? HHH falls on his face and Striker says it’s experience. Lawler has some sense and says it might have been dumb luck. Thank you Lawler. And there’s a Pedigree from nowhere for the pin. Ok then.

Rating: B-. This was pretty solid I thought. It came off like a main event level match and that’s what it was supposed to do. Also, there was a big thing here about how Sheamus should have won. Ok, that’s just stupid. HHH is a bigger star and at the big shows, the bigger stars are supposed to win.

This guy debuted a year ago and he’s wrestling a 12 time world champion at Mania. What more do you want? It’s his best match ever by about a mile also, so this worked out fine. Good match, but not a classic like Lawler claims it is.

Slim Jim Ad. OH YEAH!

We recap Rey vs. Punk. This was a cool buildup I thought but it could have been a bit more. Rey sang Happy Birthday to his daughter and Punk interrupted him. Rey cost Punk his spot in MITB. Rey’s son Dominic is taller than he is. That’s the same kid from 05 in the Eddie feud. That’s just amusing.

Rey Mysterio vs. C.M. Punk

Oh sweet Punk has a mic. Punk needs to actually win a match once in awhile to make this gimmick work perfectly though. These promos get better every single time. Rey is dressed like a character from Avatar tonight. Oh just take me now. It can’t get stupider than this. It just can’t. Yep, Rey looks like a moron dressed like that. He truly does. Gallows interferes early and it’s Punk in control. Straightedge prevails again!

Punk’s tights make me think of GI Joe for some reason. Aren’t the Na’vi really tall? See, the costume makes no sense. Punk gets a SICK kick to the side of Rey’s stupid looking head. We get a CM Punk (sucks) chant going and Rey kind of botches a backflip off the top rope into a DDT. It was close though. And Rey manages to tick me off again by doing the Eddie dance before throwing out a Frog Splash. HE IS DEAD. LET IT GO. I freaking hate the 619.

After some botched heel interference, the springboard splash ends this, saving him from joining the Straightedge Society and gaining him…nothing at all. Ok then. Not agreeing with the ending here, but it could be ok I guess. Oh and Cole says you never mess with another man’s family. I don’t see why not. Eddie did it and he gets a dozen tributes a year.

Rating: B-. Pretty good stuff here I thought. These two have decent chemistry together, but like I said I would have preferred Punk to win for a few reasons. If nothing else this could continue though so that’s a perk. Pretty solid stuff here overall.

We recap Bret vs. Vince. No way am I recapping this. If you don’t know this story by now, why are you here? The image of Vince in Bret’s sunglasses is cool.

Bret Hart vs. Vince McMahon

Man that is weird to type. Bret is in street clothes here. That’s the right thing to go with I think, as if nothing else he’s likely not in the shape he was before so why embarrass yourself? Are you listening Flair? Vince comes out and says that he has insurance for this match and it’s going to be a lumberjack match. And of course they’re the Hart Family. Bruce is a douche, period.

When they came out, it couldn’t have been much more obvious what was coming. Oh great Bruce is the referee. And of course the Harts turn on Vince before the match starts. Bret’s first punch gets a pop. Bruce, ever the douche, counts when Vince is on the floor in a match with no countouts. Vince is on the floor and the whole family beats him up including a Hart Attack from the top via the Hart Dynasty. Vince hasn’t landed a single shot.

He does however find a tire iron under the ring. Bret gets about 10 shots in with the tire iron over a few minutes. He goes for the legs and the fans go nuts. Nope not yet. Nice tease there though. He sets for it again but it’s a low blow instead. Good to see some old Bret stuff in there. David slides in a chair…which Bret sits down in. Ok this is a bit awkward. Also it’s amusing that Lawler is behind Bret here when he used to HATE Bret.

SWEET chair shot from Bret. He goes OFF on him with it for a total of TWENTY chairshots, breaking Austin’s record of shots to Rock at X7. And then he puts on the Sharpshooter and kills the Montreal Screwjob forever. Vince literally did not hit anything, not even a punch.

Rating: A+. Now before X jumps down my throat for this, you have to consider what this was about. This wasn’t about a competitive match or storytelling or anything like that. This was about Bret getting revenge on Vince. Vince never should have gotten anything in here and literally he didn’t.

Bret completely destroyed him for ten minutes and then the match ended with Vince giving up to the Sharpshooter. That is all you could have wanted out of this and the most infamous moment in wrestling history can be laid to rest. That alone makes this perfect.

Now can we make Bruce Hart fall into a hole?

Mania 27 will be in Atlanta.

The attendance is announced. That’s always cool. Of course we launch fireworks that few in the arena can see. Ok then.

We recap Edge vs. Jericho, which is a simple revenge story. This year they kept things simple and it worked very well. Jericho was showing some emotion here and it worked very well. Oh and spear, spear, SPEAR!

Smackdown World Title: Chris Jericho vs. Edge

This should be good from an in ring perspective if nothing else. Edge looks to have lost a bit of weight. They start by feeling each other out as you would expect I would assume. It is a bit odd that they try to make their tag title reign sound important when they were together what, maybe a month? Jericho and Edge trained together? I don’t remember that. Jericho is controlling which is what you would expect. Oddly there was no control period by Edge. That’s most odd.

Hey, did you know Jericho beat Austin and Rock in the same night? Edge hits a nice running clothesline from the apron to the floor. It’s the simple moves that work the best sometimes. Edge hits a sunset flip from the middle rope. Ok then. Codebreaker is blocked. Pretty good match so far. Edge, complete with the great looking eyes, goes for a spear but in a SWANK counter, Jericho jumps over and more or less gets a schoolboy into the Walls.

Since Edge is a face though he doesn’t tap. Has that ever beaten a prominent face? The Edgecution hits but of course it’s not called that anymore because the announcers suck. They point out that Jericho never gets hurt. That’s very true actually. Jericho goes for a spear but winds up hitting the Codebreaker for two. Jericho goes for the ankle which makes sense. As someone with very bad ankle problems, it really is smart to go after them if you’re fighting someone.

Walls go on again but Jericho switches to a half crab. Well he did train with Lance Storm. The crowd is having fun with this. He gets to the ropes in case you were wondering. Jericho goes for the belt but that doesn’t work. Ok never mind it does since the referee goes down. A really bad Codebreaker gets the clean pin.

I would not have seen that one coming at all. Post match, Edge gets him on one of the tables and after a running start, spears the living tar out of Jericho into a barrier which clearly will be an injury spot.

Rating: A-. That’s likely too high but I really liked this match. It was entertaining the whole time through but it needed a few more minutes. I really like the surprise ending where Edge loses when he was more or less seen as a lock. That’s risky booking but here I think it came off very well. Very good match and definitely the best of the night so far.

We talk about the battle royal before Mania which Tatsu won. Good for him.

Face Divas vs. Heel Divas

Seriously do the rosters matter here? It’s 5 on 5. That’s all you need to know. Vickie is one of the heels so of course she’ll be the focus of the whole match. Beth looks great in white. That is all. So everyone beats up Vickie until Michelle makes a save. They alternate back and forth with everyone coming in and hitting someone with a finisher until we’re left with Beth and Vickie. Michelle puts Beth down and Vickie hits a “Hog Splash” on Kelly for the win. She managed to botch a cover. That’s hard to do. This was like 3 minutes long.

Rating: F. Seriously, what the heck was this? Eddie, I never thought you were anywhere near what people made you out to be, but you deserve better than this.

Time for Cena vs. Batista. I know you know the story so I’ll spare you the details. The crowd exploded for the graphic coming onscreen.

WWE Championship: John Cena vs. Batista

Love them or hate them, this is THE money match right here. Period and end of story. There is no other combination that is a selling point like this is right here. This is what Mania is supposed to be about: the biggest stars in the world squaring off for the world championship. I’ve loved the buildup for this and it was what I was looking forward to more than anything. Oh and Cena’s thing this year is a group of Air Force drill people spinning rifles until Cena runs through them.

Far better than last year if nothing else. We start with the feeling out period as the announcers argue over who is stronger. That’s an interesting argument actually. The idea is Cena’s neck injury from about a year and a half ago is still bothering him. Sure why not? Batista counters the FU into a DDT that was PAINFUL looking. Apparently if your opponent’s arms and legs go limp, he’s in trouble. Ladies and gentlemen, the insights of Matt Striker!

If your opponent is losing the ability to support their own weight, THEY COULD BE IN TROUBLE! And the fans have already turned on Cena with the Boo/Yay thing. And then there’s a very face pop for the Five Knuckle Shuffle which is countered into a spinebuster. You would think there would be a shift to booing there but not really. STFU is hooked and we’ve cranked it into a higher gear. In a cool spot, we hit a test of strength on the top rope. That’s new if nothing else.

Five Knuckle Shuffle from the top as he channels his inner Jannetty. Yes, a Marty Jannetty move landed in a Mania main event. Batista Bomb gets two and a mouth from Batista that could swallow Molly Holly alive. Jannetty and Molly Holly got mentioned in this match. Wow. Cena gets a SWEET counter into the FU out of a reversed Batista Bomb. He rolled from slipping over the shoulders to what looked like a tombstone to the FU.

Amazing and he threw Batista about a mile but it only got two. In almost the same spot that his neck got hurt in, Batista catches Cena in a spinebuster from the top. ANOTHER Batista Bomb is countered into the STFU for the tap. It looked like a weak version but the shot of Batista’s leg made up for it. Cena being named a 9 time champion just makes it seem a bit weak though as it always does.

Post match, Cena celebrates with the crowd and we see a guy saying Cena sucks and Cena acknowledges him. That right there is something I freaking LOVE about Cena. Guys like Hogan got a mixed reaction like that and acted like they were still the most over thing ever. I’ve always hated that as it’s just idiotic.

It’s like when WCW said there isn’t a seat to be found as we scan over the crowd seeing all the tarped off areas and empty seats. Cena talks about the booing. It makes him seem more down to Earth which I like for a change.

Rating: A. Sweet match here as these two continue to be the Austin/Rock of their generation. Like I said this is the money match of this generation. The chemistry here is undeniable as Cena is one of the few guys that brings out the best in Batista. This is what a Wrestlemania main event match should be about and it delivered in a big way.

Another Extreme Rules ad.

And now, it is time. This had to be the last match, period. Flair vs. Shawn should have been as well but that’s another story. I’m again not bothering to explain this one as it’s Career vs. Streak. End of explanation. They call it the most anticipated match in Mania history. Not sure on that one.

The Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels

Well here we go. This is one of two matches this show was sold on so you know it’s going to be good considering who’s in it. This many years after he debuted, Taker’s entrance is still awesome. Taker is rocking something that makes him look a bit like a boxer which works. We hit the staredown and Shawn does Taker’s throat slit. Keep that in mind. Taker dominates early, hitting Snake Eyes and Old School in the first minute or so.

He tweeks his knee on Old School though and Shawn goes for it. Old guys know psychology. Shawn goes for the arm which makes sense as it takes away the Tombstone and Last Ride. Oh and remember there are no count outs or DQs. Both finishers miss and the crowd is liking this a lot. And now back to the knee. The arm work was brief so that’s fine. Taker teases the rope dive but Shawn slides in and takes out the knee again. Good after what happened with that move last year.

Shawn busts out a figure four and much like Flair, PUTS IT ON THE WRONG LEG. The straight leg gets hurt. How hard is that to get? Nip Up is caught in a chokeslam. I like how he just launches him with those at times. An ankle lock is on as Shawn is fine maybe 8 seconds later. He gets the heel hook out of it and Taker is in trouble. He gets out though because Shawn isn’t an American hero. Shawn gets tombstoned on the floor. Ok then.

Shawn is dead apparently. Someone comes out to check on him and of course the match keeps going. Striker, CALM DOWN! The Last Ride hits but Shawn kind of counters into an X Factor so the impact is lessened. I can forgive him for being up quickly for that. Shawn gets out of Hell’s Gate with a nifty counter where he jumps over into a rollup. That was ni…SWEET CHIN MUSIC! Of course it gets two but that came from nowhere. The camera missed most of it.

I love stuff like that as it makes things feel more shocking. Taker blocks another kick and hits the biggest Last Ride ever for two. Shawn was at least 11 feet in the air. Awesome looking. Taker looks furious.

And now, we go to the floor. This might not end well. Why do they take such care of the monitors? I’ve never gotten that. And I mean in kayfabe before you freak out on me. Taker goes for a Last Ride through the table but Shawn counters and hits Sweet Chin Music to put Taker on it. He slowly climbs up to the top rope and launches a picture perfect moonsault.

Now if only he had hit Taker’s chest and not his leg. I legit thought his leg was seriously hurt for a bit until he got up on it a bit later. Back in the ring Shawn hits the THIRD superkick and IT gets two. This isn’t quite last year’s match but it’s VERY close. Another kick is blocked into a chokeslam but his knee is out. Tombstone also gets two and the crowd is losing it over these twos. Taker is LIVID. There go the straps. Shawn hasn’t moved yet.

Taker starts the throat slit but can’t finish it. Just like he did for Jeff Hardy, he can’t bring himself to hurt him anymore. After he shouts at Shawn to stay down, Shawn does his own throat slit, admitting he just can’t do it. He then does the unthinkable and slaps Taker. This was four days ago and 3000 miles from me and the look on Taker’s face scared the heck out of me. Taker is livid and picks up Michaels for a JUMPING TOMBSTONE.

Shawn is of course legally dead now and the career ends. No music plays at first, which is a very nice touch. The crowd isn’t sure what to do. I collapsed when he got the pin on my first viewing and it’s still a tiring match to watch. Taker staggers up and does his pose as 18-0 flashes up on the screen.

That, to say the least, is mind blowing. More on that later. Taker gets him to his feet and they shake hands like they should do. It’s Shawn’s moment as Mr. Wrestlemania gets a standing ovation. He walks up the ramp, and Jerry Lawler puts is perfectly: Shawn, it’s over. Good-bye. Thank you.

Rating: A+. It’s not as good as last year’s was, but this was an epic match to say the least. We knew who was going to win, but that’s ok here to me. The ending was perfect as Shawn gave up and was defiant until the end. If someone is going to end it, Taker is a fine choice and the angle was perfect.

It’s a very emotional match, but that takes nothing away from the quality of it. The best word I can think of for this is satisfying. Everything you could want is in here and it’s a fitting end to the show. Shawn, I was never a big fan of your’s, but your career was remarkable to put it as low as I can. I’ll miss you.

Overall Rating: A. GREAT Mania. Nothing at all feels slow on here at all. Even the Divas match is at least fast paced and at three and a half minutes with hot women, how much can you really complain? This had it all as there is history, title changes, surprised, tons of emotion and a perfect card. Shocky made a comment that it’s in the top three Manias ever and he might be on to something actually.

It’s behind 17 for me and off the top of my head that’s it from a quality standpoint but I haven’t thought about it much. This was a great show though with the big matches all being great and the others being very good as well. Nothing was truly bad other than the Divas match which is totally overlookable. Great Mania and ABSOLUTELY worth seeing. I loved it.

And now for three bonus sections. Of course I’m going to do more for a Mania review. It’s the biggest show of the year and I started my reviews with Mania.

To begin with, this Mania set up the upcoming year rather well. As always, Mania marks both the beginning and the end of the year. Cena is back on top which is fine as he should be there. Jericho was a shocker to retain for me and maybe they’re showing confidence in him.

Swagger, Sheamus, Punk, Christian, Kofi and others are ready to take this company over while the current generation of stars in Cena, Batsita, Orton and HHH can more than hold down the fort and bring those guys up. That’s how you have a good company: a well rounded new generation that is ready to take over. I have high hopes for the company as the roster is clicking and the stories have been great thanks to them slowing things down and going with basic angles.

The older generation is dying away as Montreal is finally laid to rest and Shawn is retired now. That’s how things should be as guys from 8 years ago like Cena and Orton are the top guys now and they have been groomed for these spots. I have high hopes for this company as this is the best its looked in many a year.

Item number two is the Streak. This my friends, is the most amazing achievement in wrestling history. “But KB, all it means is he’s been booked strong at one point a year.” Yeah that’s nonsense. To begin with, the Streak didn’t mean anything until 2001. I don’t think it was even mentioned until around that time. Second, think of this. Shawn Michaels is called Mr. Wrestlemania. He’s wrestled at that show 17 times.

Mr. Wrestlemania has not competed at Wrestlemania as many times as Taker has won there. Let that sink in for a moment. The Streak is an angle in and of itself. What was the argument between Shawn and Taker over both times? Nothing other than beating Taker at Wrestlemania.

There is no equivalent to it in all of wrestling and there never will be. To even be around for 18 years is an accomplishment. The thing is just amazing and hopefully it will never die. It’s my favorite part of the show and it never fails to deliver.

And now we move to the white elephant in the room. Shawn Michaels, arguably the best performer ever, has retired. Like I said I was never the biggest Shawn fan, but to deny his talent or the impact he had on wrestling would be ridiculously unfair to him and his legacy. He changed the way a lot of wrestlers perform and there are many reasons why, all of which you can see by watching him.

He stole the show so many times and retired as better than probably 95% of the wrestlers in the world. He went out on top on his own terms which is all you can want. He was one of the best ever and maybe the best ever, but that’s an argument for another time. I’m sad to see him go, but glad that he went out like this. In his speech the next night on Raw he more or less said he wasn’t going to TNA which is great as he would likely wind up jobbing to people beneath him.

Also, if he ever wants to, Vince would welcome him back with open arms. His exit was classy and perfectly done and to me it would be a shame if he came back, but I could live with it. It’s sad to see him go, but nice at the same time as he can go in peace. Have a good retirement Shawn. You’ve earned it.

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – January 4, 2020 (Best Of 2019 Part 2): They’re Almost There

IMG Credit: Impact Wrestling

Impact Wrestling
Date: January 4, 2020
Hosts: Josh Matthews, Scott D’Amore

We continue our trip through the year here with the second half of the Best Of 2019. Given that Hard To Kill is in eight days, I would bet on a high concentration of Tessa Blanchard here, which isn’t the worst thing in the world. Last week’s show flew by in a good way so hopefully that continues here. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

As usual, the matches are going to be clipped on the show but I’ll be putting in the full versions.

Josh and Scott welcome us to the show and are rather happy to have a new year, even if Madison Rayne has said they can’t drink.

From Impact, November 19.

Gauntlet Match

Six people, the winner is the #1 contender. Moose is in at #1 and Daga is in at #2 to get things started. Daga picks up the pace to start and dropkicks the leg, setting up the running Downward Spiral. They head to the floor with Daga hitting a moonsault off the apron, only to have Moose throw him around with ease back inside. The Dominator gives Moose one but Daga sends him back into the corner for a running basement dropkick. The spear cuts Daga in half though and Moose moves on at 5:10.

Rich Swann is in at #3 and looks rather nervous about facing the monster. A running hurricanrana has Moose in trouble but he’s right back with a dropkick to send Swann outside. They switch places with Swann’s running hurricanrana off the apron earning himself a bit of a breather. Moose throws him down again though and Swann has to beat the count back in. This time Swann manages a DDT but gets lawn darted face first into the middle buckle for two.

Swann slips out of a powerbomb though and kicks Moose in the head, setting up the Lethal Injection for a VERY close two (good near fall there). The middle rope 450 hits Moose’s knees though and the middle rope chokebomb gives Moose two of his own. A hot shot makes it even worse but Swann jumps into a crucifix to finish Moose at 15:14.

Michael Elgin is in at #4 and Swann knows he’s in trouble. Elgin hits a slingshot elbow to the face and we take a quick break. Back with Swann hitting a dive and sending Elgin back inside for a low superkick. A whip sitout spinebuster gives Elgin two and Swann gets sent hard into the corner to rock him again. Swann gets caught in the Crossface but a foot on the ropes lets Swann get out to the apron.

Elgin snaps off a half nelson suplex to drop Swann on his head and knock him silly. A twisting Swanton misses back inside though and Swann starts kicking away. Elgin dragon suplexes him though and nails a hard clothesline to drop him on his head. A top rope superplex hits Swann but he pops right back up with a reverse hurricanrana for two. That’s quite the recovery time there. Elgin is back up with an apron superplex into a Falcon Arrow for another near fall. Another clothesline takes Elgin down again and it’s time to hammer away in the corner….before shoving the referee for the DQ to send Swann forward at 31:23.

Elgin isn’t done though and hits the Elgin Bomb, drawing out some more referees to get rid of him. We take a break and it’s Brian Cage in at #5 to continue the destruction. Swann can barely stand but manages to kick Cage in the head anyway. That’s only good for one though and Cage throws him down with ease. Swann’s superkicks set up another kick to the head and a running step onto the head puts Cage down again. The 450 gets two and it’s a cutter into Lethal Injection for a delayed two. The Phoenix Splash misses though and it’s Weapon X to get rid of Swann at 41:14.

Tessa Blanchard is in at #6 to complete the field and, after a break with a house show ad, we’re ready to go. Tessa isn’t scared of the monster so he shoves her into the corner. A powerbomb doesn’t work for Cage so Tessa springboard dropkicks him to the floor. Cage hits the F5 onto the apron though and we take another break. Back again with Tessa dropkicking the leg out and scoring with a tornado DDT for two. Another Cage powerbomb attempt is countered with a hurricanrana into the corner.

A top rope splash gives Tessa two but Cage, bleeding from the lip, knocks her away without much effort. Tessa is rocked but hits a superkick into a cutter, setting up the hammerlock DDT for the big near fall. Another hurricanrana sets up Magnum for a rather close two and Tessa can’t believe the kickout. The second Magnum is countered into a buckle bomb but Weapon X is countered into Code Red for the pin and the title shot at 55:17.

Rating: B. This was the Rich Swann Show as he got to stay out there for a long time and get the fans behind him all over again after getting beaten down time after time. The other big deal here is of course Tessa, which you knew was going to be the ending but it doesn’t make things any less special. This match worked on a variety of levels and never felt long, which is pretty impressive for a nearly hour long match. Good stuff here, with the right people doing the right things.

Wrestlers talk about how 2019 went for themselves and Impact.

Wrestlers talk about their favorite match of the year.

Scott says he wants to treat Josh better in 2020. This includes a kiss on the cheek and Josh announces the North as the Tag Team of the Year.

From Impact, November 12.

Tag Team Titles: Eddie Edwards/Naomichi Marufuji vs. The North

North is defending. Eddie and Alexander lock up to start with Eddie taking him down in a headlock. Marufuji comes in but gets headlocked takeovered for his efforts but it’s off to Eddie to work on Page’s arm in a hurry. Some double chops put Page down until Alexander comes back in to send Marufuji into the corner. Everything breaks down though and Eddie hits a dive onto the champs as we take a break.

Back with Page getting chopped some more but he gets in a cheap shot so Alexander can knock Eddie to the floor. A catapult sends Eddie’s throat into the bottom rope and it’s a Rock Bottom backbreaker into a regular backbreaker from Page. Eddie finally gets in a suplex to take Alexander down and it’s Marufuji coming in to clean some house. A kick to Page’s head gets two but he’s back up to strike it out with Marufuji.

The assisted spinebuster doesn’t work so it’s Eddie hitting a Blue Thunder Bomb for two on Alexander. Everything breaks down again until Eddie clotheslines Page for a four way knockdown. Eddie tiger bombs Alexander for two more and the shock on the kickout is real. Page grabs Eddie’s leg so the Boston Knee Party can’t launch. Marufuji gets sent outside and it’s the double Neutralizer for two on Eddie. The assisted spinebuster gives Alexander the retaining pin at 16:43.

Rating: B. This worked, as the North continues to be one of the best things going in Impact, if not the absolute best in the whole company. I don’t remember they didn’t have a very good match, though the problem is they may start running out of opponents. Other than maybe Mack and Swann, who is supposed to challenge them? Maybe we can get a new team eventually, but for now it’s going to be the North for a long time to come.

Scott likes the North.

Wrestlers talk about who had a breakout year.

Tessa Blanchard is the Wrestler of the Year.

Tessa, at home, is very proud to win it and promises to win the World Title.

From Rebellion.

Gail Kim vs. Tessa Blanchard

They stare each other down until Tessa starts slugging, earning herself a stomping in the corner. Tessa is right back with a running hurricanrana to send Gail outside, setting up the big dive. Gail pulls her into the post but gets caught with a Codebreaker out of the corner for two. A powerslam gives Gail two of her own but the Black Widow is countered into a backbreaker.

The trash talk starts rolling, with Tessa even yelling down at Gail’s husband in the crowd. Gail misses a charge and falls out to the floor, setting up a double posting for a double knockdown. Tessa takes her time getting up and gets caught in the Hartbreaker around the post, which still doesn’t make a ton of sense. Back in and Gail fires off forearms to set up a spinning high crossbody.

With the required YOU STILL GOT IT chant going, Tessa shoves Gail to the ramp, where a spinning full nelson faceplant sends her crashing down to the floor. That’s not quite enough for the countout and Tessa is stunned. The slingshot suplex is countered into Eat Defeat for two so Gail goes up. With Tessa following up, she gets caught in a dragon sleeper so it’s a bite to the elbow for the break.

You don’t see that one everyday, which is also the case with the super gorilla press drop to send Gail right back down. Magnum gets two so it’s off to a cobra clutch Crossface for something new. Gail gets her foot on the ropes but that doesn’t count this time as Tessa rolls into the middle of the ring for the clean tap at 16:03.

Rating: B+. Match of the night here with Tessa getting the signature win and continuing to look like the best female wrestler in the world (and one of the best anywhere). They beat each other up here and thankfully they went with the right ending. Tessa is looking like the next megastar though and hopefully Impact knows it.

Post match they hug, as Tessa might be on her way to a face turn. Gail gets the big sign of respect.

Wrestlers on what to expect in 2020.

Wrestlers pick Tessa Blanchard to beat Sami Callihan at Hard To Kill 6-4.

From Slammiversary in the Match of the Year.

Sami Callihan vs. Tessa Blanchard

They both have their own baseball bats. They stare each other down for over a minute before Tessa fires off the forearms to the face. A headscissors puts Sami on the apron and a dropkick sends him to the floor. The suicide dive is countered into a powerbomb though and Sami swings her into the barricade for a thud that made me cringe. A Death Valley Driver on the floor should knock Tessa cold but Sami slams her down instead.

That’s good for an eight count with Sami not even looking at the ring. Back in and Tessa hits a running neckbreaker but Sami runs her over. Tessa rolls up the ramp but she escapes a powerbomb into the crowd. The jumping cutter drops Sami on the ramp and a tornado DDT gives Tessa two back inside.

Sami scores with Get Outta Here and a knee to the face, setting up an STF. Tessa grabs the rope for the break and escapes a super powerbomb, meaning it’s a running Codebreaker out of the corner. The referee gets shoved away though and Sami hits her in the face with the bat for two.

The replacement referee gets knocked down as well and Tessa gets in her own bat shot. Magnum gets two so Tessa switches into a Crossface in the middle of the ring (Callis: “BREAK HIS NECK!”). That’s reversed into a kneeling Tombstone to give Sami two, allowing Tessa to give him thumbs up, thumbs down. The Cactus Special finishes Tessa at 15:01.

Rating: C+. I’m not sure what to think of this one. Tessa didn’t look overwhelmed and her offense was believable against Sami, which was the most important thing. That being said, this wasn’t exactly as epic as the build would have had you believe and it felt weird seeing this in the main event. Tessa fighting men going forward is fine, though they’re going to have to do this carefully to make sure it doesn’t go too far into the unbelievable.

Post match Sami bangs both bats together and hands Tessa hers before leaving.

Tessa promises to win the title at Hard To Kill.

Overall Rating: B+. There’s something interesting about the Match of the Year being the weakest on the show. Anyway, this was almost all about Tessa and that’s what it should have been. The wrestling was the entire point here and that’s what it needed to be. I had a good time watching this and if they can have one awesome go home show, we could be in for a heck of a pay per view next week. Good stuff here as Impact gets to show its better parts, of which there were several last year.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Rebellion 2019: The Pattern Holds

IMG Credit: Impact Wrestling

Rebellion
Date: April 28, 2019
Location: Rebel Sports Complex, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Don Callis, Josh Matthews

It’s back to pay per view for these people after some rather uninspiring television (though the go home show was good). The wrestling has been more than adequate but there’s very little that makes me want to watch this show. Now, that doesn’t mean this show will be bad, but rather than I haven’t been thrilled getting here. Let’s get to it.

The opening video asks what a rebellion is and how important it is to fight, all over clips of the feuds on the card. Not bad at all, as the recap videos have gotten better as of late.

Petey Williams vs. Jake Crist vs. Aiden Prince vs. Ace Austin vs. Cousin Jake vs. Eddie Edwards

Bonus match because a six match card wasn’t going to work. One fall to a finish and Jake is one of the Deaners. The brawling is on to start with Eddie hitting a suicide dive on Jake but getting taken down by a slingshot hurricanrana from Petey. Prince gets a running charge for a dive but Crist cutters him out of the air and onto the pile for the massive crash that would have taken Prince out even without the cutter. Petey Russian legsweeps Crist into the Sharpshooter with Deaner making the save.

That allows Austin to start his handspring into a kick on the apron but Crist is right there with another cutter from the top. A suicide DDT drops Deaner but it’s Petey up with a slingshot Codebreaker to Crist as he lands on Eddie for a cool crash. Prince’s 450 gets two on Crist with Prince making the save, earning himself a kick in the head from Austin. Eddie is back in with a tiger driver for two on Austin with Deaner making the save. That earns him a Canadian Destroyer from Williams but Austin dives in for the rollup pin at 4:59.

Rating: C+. It felt like an Impact match but I like keeping something like this short. There’s no need to have them go through spot after spot when you can just do the crazy spot fest until someone gets the pin. Austin has needed a win and this is a good star for him. I could see him going somewhere and anytime I could see more magic, I’m rather pleased.

The announcers preview the rest of the card that you already bought.

Impact Plus is coming as a replacement for the Global Wrestling Network. Good, as the thing was a mess from the start so a relaunch is a good idea.

Sami Callihan is sick of Rich Swann smiling at him and not meaning any of it. Tonight the Death Machine is coming for Swann in an OVE Rules match. He’s going to break Swann’s legs because he loves him like a brother.

Rohit Raju vs. Scarlett Bordeaux

This was set up earlier today as a replacement for the live Smoke Show. Raju has both Gama and Raj Singh with him like Scarlett has Fallah Bahh. Scarlett starts fast and takes over in the corner until a trip puts her down. That earns Raju a walk over his back so he takes Scarlett outside for a Russian legsweep into the barricade.

Back in and Scarlett is fine enough to chop away, setting up a headscissors into a Crossface to put Raju in even more trouble. That’s broken up so Scarlett snaps off a German suplex to send Raju to the floor, meaning a big dive follows him out. Back up and Raj crotches her on top, allowing Raju to load up a Stinkface. Since you don’t do that to Scarlett, it’s a low blow into the belly to back kneeling piledriver to give Scarlett the pin at 5:03.

Rating: D. I love Scarlett’s character for a variety of reasons, but having her do the same match over and over again is going to take away the appeal in a hurry. This was Raju being a cocky jerk who got in trouble for being stupid. The problem is that’s how most of her matches are likely to go and you can only do that for so long. It didn’t help that the match wasn’t very good and was another bonus match, which kind of goes to show you how thin the card is so far.

We recap Moose/The North vs. the Rascalz. The Rascalz made fun of Moose for his bad luck with women, meaning it was time for Moose to destroy all of them. The numbers got the better of him though and Dezmond Xavier stole a win. Therefore, it’s time to bring in some help.

Moose/The North vs. Rascalz

The Rascalz gets smart by rapid firing in and out against Moose with kicks to the legs and slingshot hilos. Moose pops to his feet though and hands it off to Josh Alexander to suplex Dezmond for two. A backbreaker gets two and Ethan Page adds a swinging version for his own. Dezmond sends the North into each other but Page is fine enough to run him over and prevent the hot tag.

Everything breaks down and it’s the big shoving moonsault to the floor so Wentz can take out Page. Miguel’s running flip dive is pulled out of the air by raw Moose power, meaning a swing into the barricade. Dezmond isn’t done though and uses Josh’s back as a launchpad to take Moose out. Back in and Alexander puts Miguel and Dezmond on the same shoulder at the same time in an impressive power display.

That’s broken up and it’s a 619 into a top rope Meteora into a Swanton into the Final Flash from Dezmond onto Alexander. Thinking quickly though, Page Border Tosses Miguel onto both of them for an impressive looking save. Wentz gets thrown over the top onto Miguel, leaving Dezmond to take a series of kicks to the face. The Burning Hammer into the whip spinebuster sets up No Jackhammer Needed to finish Dezmond at 9:22.

Rating: B. This was a lot of fun, though they were kind of in trouble with the booking. You don’t want the new team in the North losing and Moose can’t take another fall, but the Rascalz really need to stop losing. It’s the lesser of two evils, and thankfully it came at the end of an entertaining, fast paced match. More of the usual from the Rascalz in other words.

Johnny Impact and Taya Valkyrie aren’t worried about their title defenses.

We recap Taya Valkyrie vs. Jordynne Grace. Taya is the confident champion but Grace pinned her in a non-title match and then cost her a match against Madison Rayne. Grace is a monster but Taya doesn’t seem scared.

Knockouts Title: Jordynne Grace vs. Taya Valkyrie

Jordynne is challenging and charges straight at the champ to start. They head outside with Taya being powerbombed onto the apron. Back inside and a middle rope backsplash gives Grace two. Taya snaps the arm across the top rope though and starts wrapping it around the steel. That’s only good for a one so Taya hits a Bubba Bomb to set up a cross armbreaker. Grace is in the ropes in a hurry so Taya pulls her back down into a hanging DDT for two.

Taya grabs something like a cousin of the Rings of Saturn but gets driven hard into the corner for the break. One heck of a clothesline gives Jordynne two and a Michinoku Driver gets the same with the arm not holding up enough for the pin. Taya goes up and is quickly caught in a Muscle Buster for a pair of very close twos. A pinfall reversal sequence gives us more near falls but the arm is too bad for the Grace Driver. Taya pulls on the arm again and it’s the Road To Valhalla to retain the title at 8:59.

Rating: C. The story was there but the ending felt rather flat with Taya just winning clean after the arm work. It makes sense, but I was expecting more from the monster Grace. The match was fine enough, though I’m not sure who is supposed to challenge Taya now. Madison Rayne? Is that where we’re going now? Or maybe a face Tessa? I’m not sure how that would go but it would be different.

Gail Kim is ready for Tessa Blanchard tonight.

We recap Sami Callihan vs. Rich Swann. Callihan’s family took Swann in as a kid and Swann considered Sami family. Then Sami went nuts and they split, with Swann declining an invitation to join OVE. You don’t do that to Sami, so he’s coming for the X-Division Title.

X-Division Title: Sami Callihan vs. Rich Swann

Sami is challenging and anything goes. No dancing from Swann here so you know he’s taking this one seriously. An exchange of shots to the face goes to the champ and it’s already time to head to the floor. Swann staple guns him in the head and the weapons are thrown inside. Back in and Swann’s sunset flip is broken up by a staple gun to the mouth.

A Broski Boot makes it even worse for Swann and his suicide dive is knocked out of the air with a metal shot to the head. The Cactus Special on the apron should be the pin but here’s it’s not even enough for a cover. Instead Sami puts a piece of barricade between the ramp and the steps, which we’ll get back to later. Back in and Swann gets out of a Razor’s Edge, only to be suplexed through an open chair for two.

Swann again isn’t dead and swings away with a cookie sheet. That earns him a spit to the face, which Swann licks off and drops Sami for two more. Wet floor signs to the head have Sami down on the ramp and a Lethal Injection makes it even worse. The fans chant HOLY S*** at that, but not at the suplex through the chair earlier? Those are some weird standards. Now it’s time for the bridged barricade, with Sami going with a groin claw into a Cactus Special onto said barricade….for two.

With that out of the way, it’s time for a big bucket of Legos. A super hurricanrana brings Sami down onto those but since they don’t mean much more than pain, he’s right back up with powder into Swann’s face. That means a super Cactus Special onto the Legos for two and now it’s a barbed wire baseball bat. Swann spits at him, hits Sami low, and, after an I Love You from Sami, hits him in the head with the wire. A Crossface with the barbed wire bat makes Sami tap at 16:03.

Rating: C+. They lost me hard here with one big spot after another that not only didn’t finish the match but didn’t really seem to cause that much damage. A super piledriver should finish someone off and here it just gets two? After a piledriver on a barricade? The other problem was the Legos, which seem like something you would see in a comedy match, but then a few seconds later it’s a barbed wire baseball bat. You can’t jump from one tone to another like that so fast and it didn’t work.

Tessa Blanchard talks about how much respect she has for Gail Kim, who was here before the Revolution. Then Gail made it personal and tonight Tessa is finishing it. TULLY BLANCHARD comes in and says make him proud.

We recap Tessa vs. Gail. Kim cost her the Knockouts Title in January because Tessa wouldn’t respect her as guest referee, sending Tessa into a legal battle to get rid of Gail. It worked to a degree, but Gail came out of retirement for this match. It’s a good build, though I’m more than a little worried about Tessa losing.

Gail Kim vs. Tessa Blanchard

They stare each other down until Tessa starts slugging, earning herself a stomping in the corner. Tessa is right back with a running hurricanrana to send Gail outside, setting up the big dive. Gail pulls her into the post but gets caught with a Codebreaker out of the corner for two. A powerslam gives Gail two of her own but the Black Widow is countered into a backbreaker.

The trash talk starts rolling, with Tessa even yelling down at Gail’s husband in the crowd. Gail misses a charge and falls out to the floor, setting up a double posting for a double knockdown. Tessa takes her time getting up and gets caught in the Hartbreaker around the post, which still doesn’t make a ton of sense. Back in and Gail fires off forearms to set up a spinning high crossbody.

With the required YOU STILL GOT IT chant going, Tessa shoves Gail to the ramp, where a spinning full nelson faceplant sends her crashing down to the floor. That’s not quite enough for the countout and Tessa is stunned. The slingshot suplex is countered into Eat Defeat for two so Gail goes up. With Tessa following up, she gets caught in a dragon sleeper so it’s a bite to the elbow for the break.

You don’t see that one everyday, which is also the case with the super gorilla press drop to send Gail right back down. Magnum gets two so it’s off to a cobra clutch Crossface for something new. Gail gets her foot on the ropes but that doesn’t count this time as Tessa rolls into the middle of the ring for the clean tap at 16:03.

Rating: B+. Match of the night here with Tessa getting the signature win and continuing to look like the best female wrestler in the world (and one of the best anywhere). They beat each other up here and thankfully they went with the right ending. Tessa is looking like the next megastar though and hopefully Impact knows it.

Post match they hug, as Tessa might be on her way to a face turn. Gail gets the big sign of respect.

An angry Brian Cage promises to rip Johnny Impact’s head off tonight.

We recap Johnny Impact vs. Brian Cage. Johnny barely survived at Homecoming and kept dodging giving Cage a rematch, eventually turning heel because he’s tired of the fans thinking they know everything. He then got senior referee Johnny Bravo in his pocket, so tonight it’s Lance Storm as guest referee. That’s going to be fine because Storm is Canadian, meaning he has values. And he hosts a podcast with the company’s boss.

Impact Wrestling World Title: Brian Cage vs. Johnny Impact

Impact, with Taya and Bravo, is defending and Lance Storm is guest referee. Cage comes out with the Terminator gear, which didn’t do so well for him last time. They continue a trend tonight by starting fast with Impact being driven into the corner and walking into a German suplex. The F5 gets two less than a minute in and it’s the apron superplex for two more as Cage is on fire to start.

Another apron superplex is countered into a German suplex from the champ and some knees to the face have Cage in trouble. The standing shooting star is countered with raw power and Cage shows off the standing moonsault for another two. Johnny rolls to the ramp and comes back with a Spanish Fly to the floor (which caused Cage to go to the emergency room after the show).

A running knee to the face busts Cage open and we hit the chinlock as he tries to get some feeling in his back again. Cage Hulks Up and shrugs off an enziguri but a springboard spear gives Johnny two. Taya and Bravo set up a table at ringside as Johnny gets two off the Moonlight Drive. They head outside with Johnny putting him on the table and calling a very loud spot.

Cage pops up and powerbombs him through the table but has to go after Bravo. The distraction lets Impact hit Cage with the belt (right in front of Storm, who “didn’t see it”). Instead Taya pulls Storm to the floor so Johnny can baseball slide him from behind for the expected ref bump.

Back in and Johnny throws the title to Taya and plays dead, leaving Taya to take a powerbomb from Cage. After that rather unnecessary portion, Impact hits Cage with the title and misses Starship Pain (as always) so Bravo can run in for two. Storm superkicks Bravo and Cage does the same to Johnny, setting up a Falcon Arrow called the Drill Claw for the pin and the title at 13:17.

Rating: B-. Oh yeah that injury sucked the life out of Cage, who spent most of the rest of the match stumbling around and taking right hands to the face. What we got was still good, but the weakened Cage was hard to ignore. They did get the ending right though, as Cage had to win the title after being screwed out of it so many times.

Post match Cage celebrates….and Michael Elgin debuts (good thing they have his Twitter handle ready for his name graphic). Elgin powerbombs Cage and counts his own pin before walking away. I’m surprised Elgin was brought back into a major promotion but maybe things have blown over.

Slammiversary is in Dallas on July 7.

Konnan fires LAX up for their title match in the main event. He didn’t want it to come to this but now that it has, they’re coming out guns blazing. Konnan can still cut a fired up promo.

We recap the Lucha Bros vs. LAX, which started as a dream feud with the Bros winning the titles in Mexico. LAX turned on them and tonight it’s Full Metal Mayhem (TLC) to blow everything off once and for all (or as close to Impact can get to doing that).

Tag Team Titles: LAX vs. Lucha Bros

The Bros are defending and it’s TLC but you win by pinfall or submission. The champs try some dives to start but get knocked out of the air as LAX starts fast. Some tables are set up against the barricade and the Bros are right back with running flip dives through said tables to take over. They get inside for the first time with kicks to Ortiz’s face setting up the wheelbarrow splash for two.

Santana comes in and gets caught in a trashcan with a double superkick. A table is set up in the corner but Ortiz rolls Santana up, sending him into a cutter on Pentagon. The top rope Codebreaker from Ortiz sets up the double belly to back faceplant but Fenix dives in for the save. Santana is back up and stomps Fenix down in the corner. Two chairs are set up in the corner and Fenix gets caught in a hanging cutter/top rope double stomp combination for the latest near fall (no save this time).

Santana kicks Pentagon over the barricade and it’s time for the ladder. Everyone gets back in for the slugout before sitting down in four chairs. They slug it out again, though this time in a little more comfort. LAX gets the better of it and bust out the forks. The Bros get back up so some chairs are pelted at their heads, only to have LAX collapse as well. LAX gets up again and put Fenix on top before setting up six chairs in front of the corner.

Pentagon makes the save and it’s the spike Fear Factor onto the chairs….for two. My goodness it’s bleeding over from the X-Division Title match. The Bros load up a regular spike Fear Factor (If the one onto a chair doesn’t work, the regular one certainly will!) but Fenix makes the save, allowing Santana to drive Pentagon through the chair. The fans want and receive a ladder, plus a table on the ramp.

Fenix pops up though and grabs a Spanish Fly off the ladder through the table to make Ortiz vibrate. Back in and it’s a Pentagon Driver to put Santana through a chair for two more so Pentagon loads up two more tables. That’s not enough so we’ll add thumbtacks but since that takes WAY TOO LONG, Santana is awake enough to slug it out with him on top of the ladder. Ortiz gets back up and grabs Pentagon, allowing Santana to stab him in the head with fork. That’s enough for the powerbomb through the tables and the tacks to give LAX the titles back at 20:51.

Rating: A-. While a lot of the stuff has been done before, they went with the right idea here: let two talented teams and four talented guys go nuts with whatever they can find. Sometimes you don’t need to go for the storytelling and need to just shoot for the carnage, which is what they did here. I can overlook some of the near falls as this was a heck of a fight, though they need to go do something else as they’re not topping this anytime soon.

Post match everyone pulls themselves up and Konnan orders them to hug. The big show of respect, including some minor members of the locker room (and Taylor Wilde) coming out to celebrate) ends the show.

Overall Rating: B. As is almost always the case, this promotion is much, much better when there’s less focus on the stories. The action was good (well mostly good) and they made the right call with the Tag Team Titles main eventing. It’s a solid show up and down with two very good matches, though they need to have the TV to back it up, which is always the issue. For now though, a very good show that is worth seeing, if you fast forward a little here and there.

Results

Ace Austin b. Cousin Jake, Eddie Edward, Aiden Prince, Jake Crist and Petey Williams – Rollup to Jake

Scarlett Bordeaux b. Rohit Raju – Belly to back kneeling piledriver

Moose/The North b. Rascalz – No Jackhammer Needed to Xavier

Taya Valkyrie b. Jordynne Grace – Road To Valhalla

Rich Swann b. Sami Callihan – Crossface with a barbed wire baseball bat

Tessa Blanchard b. Gail Kim – Cobra clutch Crossface

Brian Cage b. Johnny Impact – Drill Claw

LAX b. Lucha Bros – Powerbomb through two tables to Pentagon

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Impact Wrestling Rebellion Preview

IMG Credit: Impact Wrestling

I feel like I always need to confirm that Impact Wrestling still does pay per views. This is their spring offering, though it isn’t clear who is rebelling against what. Lately the company has been rebelling against the idea of going with anything fresh and it has become a bit of a chore to watch. That being said, their pay per views tend to be much better than television because it’s all about the in-ring product, which is usually an improvement. Let’s get to it.

Knockouts Title: Taya Valkyrie(c) vs. Jordynne Grace

We’ll start off with a match that could go either way as Valkyrie seems like someone they want as a long term champion but Grace is a monster who no one has been able to slow down yet. Now the problem with that is that once she loses, a lot of that momentum goes sailing out the window. I’m also thinking that the show taking place in Canada isn’t going to do Grace’s chances any favors as Valkyrie is of course Canadian.

I’ll take Grace winning though, as it might be a bad night for Valkyrie and her husband. The division has been needing some fresh blood for a long time now and Grace could be it. Let her run some people over for a few weeks or months before losing it back to someone else. Like the best female in the world not working for WWE (or perhaps including that batch) in Tessa Blanchard. But yeah, Grace wins here, as she should.

X-Division Title: Rich Swann(c) vs. Sami Callihan

This story has been more interesting than I would have guessed as Callihan oddly grows on me more and more. Swann is a good choice for the title as he can wrestle that X-Division style, but there comes a point where Callihan has to win something and that hasn’t been the case yet. He’s been chasing the title for a few months now and this might be the night he gets there.

So yeah I think Callihan gets the title here as there’s little reason to not give it to him. You can even go somewhere with the issues between Swann and Willie Mack. It’s a good idea to give Callihan something as he’s going to have suitors and putting a title on him could make him happier. I wouldn’t be surprised to see him move towards the World Title scene sooner rather than later either. For now though, the X-Division Title will do.

Tag Team Titles: Lucha Bros(c) vs. LAX

This is Full Metal Mayhem, which loosely translates to TLC With Pins. These teams have been feuding for months now with LAX dropping the titles and then turning heel, meaning it’s time for a major gimmick match to blow it off. LAX has looked like stars over the last year and getting them against a team like this, one of the best in the world (maybe even the best), has done nothing but good things for them.

I’m basically flipping a coin here but I’ll take the Lucha Bros to retain. We can worry about no one but LAX being on their level later, because this match is going to rock. These four work so well together and the Lucha Bros can turn anything they do into a classic. I’ve been nearly drooling over this match since I first heard about it and that’s not going to change now. It should be great and could go either way but I’ll take the Bros to retain.

Gail Kim vs. Tessa Blanchard

I’ll spare you another rant about Impact’s obsession with Kim and go with how well this match has been built up. The story started months ago but thankfully they’ve waited until the pay per view to actually set it up. As worried as I am about where this match is going to go, the story has been well done and I’m hoping that the match itself is as good as the buildup has been.

As for the winner, I’m going to do something probably not that bright and give Impact Wrestling the benefit of the doubt. I’ll take Blanchard for the win, because there is no reason whatsoever to go with Kim. She’s retired and not likely to wrestle again and Blanchard could be one of the biggest stars in the company very soon. Go with what makes sense instead of giving Kim another tribute that she doesn’t need.

Impact Wrestling World Title: Johnny Impact(c) vs. Brian Cage

Somehow this feud feels like the third (or arguably fourth) biggest match on the show and that’s not a good sign. I haven’t been a fan of this one since it started nearly four months ago and it hasn’t gotten much better. For some reason it just isn’t interesting and I don’t know how much better this match is going to make things. Their match at Homecoming was good, but I need something more to make me care than Impact suddenly turning heel.

I’ll go with Cage winning, because he’s been built up so much that he has to win the title at some point or there’s nowhere for him to go. Now hopefully that means that the story is done between these two, because there is no need for it to stretch on into the summer. The feud hasn’t been very interesting in months and Lance Storm as guest referee isn’t the cure. Cage wins, and I’ll try to make myself care.

Overall Thoughts

And that’s it. Seriously the show has five matches announced and we’re less than forty eight hours away. They’ve also announced a live Smoke Show from Scarlett Bordeaux which will likely set up a sixth match but egads man. How do you only have five matches set up when you had more than two months to get the show ready? I’m sure it will be fine (Impact pay per views always are) but we’re in for a mystery box show and that’s not the most thrilling.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Impact Wrestling – April 12, 2019: The One Two Combination Of Impact Troubles

IMG Credit: Impact Wrestling

Impact Wrestling
Date: April 12, 2019
Location: St. Clair’s College, Windsor, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Don Callis, Josh Matthews

We’re about two weeks away from Rebellion and you can see most of the card from here. That’s a good sign as you should be able to know what you’re getting this close to the pay per view and it’s looking pretty solid on paper. The problem is they rarely get beyond solid and it would be nice to move forward for a change. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

Moose vs. Zachary Wentz

Wentz goes for a wristlock to start and Moose throws him around for the easy escape. A lot bridge puts Moose on the floor for an apron superkick and Wentz is actually able to muscle him back in. That’s not a good idea as it’s a running corner dropkick to put him down again and Moose sends Wentz flying. The referee does at least yell at Moose before he chokes away on the ropes a bit more.

The other Rascalz can only watch as it’s an apron bomb to knock Wentz even sillier. Moose throws him back in but stops to pose, allowing Wentz to hit a dive. Back in and some running knees in the corner rock Moose, setting up a springboard crossbody for two. A high crossbody (minus the springboard) is countered into a gorilla press toss over the top onto the other Rascalz. The spear finishes Wentz at 8:36.

Rating: C. This mini feud has been far more entertaining than it should be, though I’m not sure where it goes. Does Moose just beat all three of them and then move on to something else? That’s not the best usage of a rather talented team, though maybe they can come up with something else before Moose runs through them all.

Rob Van Dam is back full time.

Rob is glad to be back and hopes his magnetic waist still has it.

Madison Rayne isn’t letting her loss to Jordynne Grace get to her because the goal is the Knockouts Title. Tessa Blanchard comes in to say that the glory days are over. Madison brings up beating Tessa twice and is fine with doing it a third time.

Rosemary vs. Su Yung

Yung has her usual army of bridesmaids with her. Rosemary charges straight at her and hammers away as she continues to blame Su for the loss of Allie. The upside down triangle choke over the ropes has Yung in more trouble but she gets out and starts in on the knee. A dragon screw legwhip sends Rosemary down and it’s time to bring out the bloody glove.

That takes too long though and a reverse DDT puts both of them down. A German suplex doesn’t work on Yung so Rosemary spears her, drawing the bridesmaids up to the apron. Cue Kiera Hogan to go after them but Rosemary doesn’t want to hear it. The Bridesmaids jump her for the DQ at 5:30.

Rating: D+. This was more storyline based than anything else and that’s ok for the most part. It’s interesting that Yung is now being pushed at a stronger level than where she was when Allie was in her corner. The story can continue, though you could argue that it should have ended a long time ago.

Post match Hogan is forced to watch as Rosemary gets beaten down. Hogan gets a Panic Switch of her own.

Video on United We Stand. Tommy Dreamer thinks it feels like ECW. I know it’s not the same thing, but Impact surpassed the initial success of ECW a long time ago. That’s not the greatest compliment in the world. The wrestlers are fired up over making it such a success. I’d have to see a failure.

Ace Austin isn’t happy with Aiden Prince costing him the six way scramble last week and wants revenge.

GWN Flashback of the Week: Taylor Wilde vs. Angelina Love, I believe from No Surrender 2008.

Killer Kross talks to Willie Mack about….jazz music? Speaking of jazz, Rich Swann likes jazz and is playing Swann for a fool. Wouldn’t be shocking actually.

The Deaners are still coming.

North vs. Sheldon Jean/El Reverso

That would be Josh Alexander/Ethan Page. Alexander and Reverso start things off and it’s quickly off to Jean, who gets his arm cranked. Reverso comes back in and gets caught in an assisted spinning sitout DDT from Page. A spinning backbreaker keeps Reverso in trouble and a powerbomb backbreaker from Alexander makes it even worse. Reverso gets over for the tag to Sheldon, who comes in with a springboard clothesline. Alexander cuts him off at the knees though and it’s a series of strikes to Reverso’s head, setting up a reverse AA into a whip spinebuster for the pin at 5:25.

Rating: D+. The North (not a good name) looked nice enough together and some of their double teaming was rather impressive. That being said, they shouldn’t give up so much offense in their debut, let alone to two unknowns. I mean, his name is El Reverso. How much should he be getting in?

Gail Kim doesn’t want to hear Tessa talk.

The North is here to stay.

Madison Rayne vs. Tessa Blanchard

Gail is on commentary. Madison doesn’t like Tessa shoving her in the face to start so she gets in a kick to the ribs. A rope walk hurricanrana sends Tessa outside for a few seconds but she’s right back in for some dropkicks to the back. Tessa’s suplex makes it even worse and we hit the chinlock….as we look at Gail for the fourth time in less than three minutes. Madison gets caught in the corner for a Codebreaker and we take a break.

Back with Madison hitting some forearms and a dropkick as we look at Gail AGAIN. Tessa’s spinning full nelson faceplant gets two and a double slingshot suplex is good for the same. The frustration sets in as we look at Gail for the eighth time in about ten minutes. Tessa grabs a chair but Gail takes it away, allowing Madison to get a rollup pin at 13:57.

Rating: C. I knew the Gail Kim love would be strong and that’s what we got here with the ridiculous amount of cutting over to her. The story is good and has been well built up, but I’m scared that they’re going to give Gail the win instead of going with the move that makes sense. Madison was her usual self here, which is exactly the kind of thing they brought her back in to do.

Post match Tessa yells at commentary.

Eddie Edwards and Eli Drake ask the Lucha Bros for a Tag Team Title shot but LAX comes in for the double beatdown.

The Deaners are still coming.

Johnny Impact says someone as dumb as Brian Cage only comes around once every thousand years. Now he has a fan club in Jordynne Grace that he can do food prep with. Taya Valkyrie implies that Grace and Cage are sleeping together to get under Melissa Santos’ skin.

OVE calls Rich Swann a walking dumpster fire. Swann stabbed them in the back and at Rebellion, they’re taking the X-Division Title.

Tessa promises to make it personal with Gail.

Rob Van Dam is back soon.

Fallah Bahh can’t find KM so he goes into the women’s dressing room and finds Scarlett Bordeaux. She doesn’t mind and agrees to team with him next week.

Johnny Impact/Taya Valkyrie vs. Jordynne Grace/Brian Cage

Taya is willing to start with Cage but she gets run over by Grace to start instead. They trade whips into the corner with Grace hitting a Cannonball, sending Taya over for a tag. Johnny is good though and bails to the floor to avoid having to face Cage. We take a break and come back with Johnny backing off from Cage, who shrugs off a superkick.

The fall away slam sends Johnny down but the springboard corkscrew crossbody staggers Cage just a bit. One heck of a clothesline blasts Impact and a backdrop gets way more height than it should be able to. Johnny finally slides between the legs and dives over to Taya. A trip to Grace lets Taya take over with a Jeff Hardy legdrop between the legs for two. Taya cranks on the arm and a running hip attack keeps Grace in trouble. That just means a sitout powerbomb out of the corner to plant Taya and a roll into the corner allows the tag to Cage.

Rating: D+. It’s like they’ve run out of good ideas to keep this feud going so they’re going to the most basic booking tropes they can think of. The crooked referee isn’t one of my favorite stories and while it’s better than watching them have the same matches over and over, this feud needed to end about two months ago and it’s just going on and on.

Post match Cage gets beaten down so Impact and Taya can pose with the referee. Johnny kisses Taya to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Not their best show here as they’ve spent way too long on a lot of these stories and need something fresh. Impact has always had issues with making their main event stories seem epic and knowing when to end a feud, both of which are on full display here. It’s not a bad show by any stretch but it didn’t make me want to see Rebellion, which I’m often forgetting about in general. Just get to something fresh and make it more interesting.

Results

Moose b. Zachary Wentz – Spear

Rosemary b. Su Yung via DQ when the Undead Bridesmaids interfered

The North b. Sheldon Gene/El Reverso – Assisted whip spinebuster to Reverso

Madison Rayne b. Tessa Blanchard – Rollup

Johnny Impact/Taya Valkyrie b. Brian Cage/Jordynne Grace – Knee to Cage’s head

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Impact Wrestling – December 28, 2017 (Best of 2017 Part 2): Get Your Priorities Straight

Impact Wrestling
Date: December 28, 2017
Host: Josh Matthews

It’s the second half of the Best of 2017 show and that means a lot more copying and pasting. There are several options that they could choose to air here but the Bound For Glory main event has already been announced. Next week is the show that really matters though so let’s get to it.

We open with a quick video from Slammiversary.

Speaking of Slammiversary.

Unification match and Gail Kim is at ringside. Rosemary has an army of freaks with her. Rosemary goes right after her and here are Laurel Van Ness and KM for the nearly immediate distraction. Sienna gets thrown out onto them and orders them to the back, leaving us one on one again.

From Slammiversary again. This was joined in progress but here’s the full thing.

Jeremy Borash/Joseph Park vs. Josh Matthews/Scott Steiner

From August 24, we see the final five entrants in Gauntlet for the Gold. The match ran over fifty five minutes but we only see about five minutes.

Videos on the international partnerships, including long videos on Eddie Edwards as the GHC World Champion and Johnny Impact as the triple champion of AAA.

Video on Taya Valkyrie.

From September 14, joined in progress again.

X-Division Title: Sonjay Dutt vs. Trevor Lee

Dutt is defending and this is falls count anywhere. Lee gets two on the floor off a baseball slide but Dutt sends him into the barricade for a breather. They head inside for the first time with Lee kicking him in the face, only to get dropped again. Dutt throws in a chair but Lee throws it right back out.

They hit kicks to the head at the same time for a double knockdown. Why there’s no count when Dutt’s leg is over Lee isn’t clear, but I’d guess it’s because that’s not in the script and the referee doesn’t know any better. Dutt’s tornado DDT plants Lee but a superplex plants Dutt just as fast. They head outside again with Lee throwing a chair at his head before fighting into the crowd.

We take a break (of course we do) and come back with the fight heading into the back. Caleb Konley jumps Dutt, because falls count anywhere now means No DQ. A trashcan to the head gives Lee two but heel miscommunication lets him get a breather. Dutt is busted open and it’s time to hit Lee in the head with a trashcan lid. A tornado DDT off the wall is countered with a crotching onto a barricade and Lee rolls him up (with tights) for the pin and the title at 13:57.

Rating: C+. It never ceases to amaze me how much they’ve sucked the soul out of this division. This was a fast paced match and I couldn’t bring myself to care about it no matter how hard I tried. It’s just not interesting no matter how hard they try (and the wrestlers are trying) and so much of that is due to how worthless the X-Division is now. They’re treated like an afterthought and have been for years now. Why would I care if the company doesn’t?

From Bound For Glory.

Tag Team Titles: OVE vs. LAX

LAX is defending and this is a street fight. There’s no Homicide, suggesting that he was the one down in the back. Santana and Ortiz dive onto the champs to start in a hurry. The brawl splits in two with Jake kicking a trashcan wrapped around Ortiz as Dave and Santana fight in the crowd. Ortiz fights back and grabs a running Liger Bomb off the ramp through a table to basically kill Jake.

Santana climbs the scaffolding as the fans chant about how they can’t see anything. A big splash from near the roof crushes Dave through a table and thankfully they’re both alive. Back at ringside, Jake fights off a table and pelts a chair at Ortiz’s head to save himself. Some chairs are set up in the ring and it’s Jake superplexing Ortiz through them, banging up his own back pretty badly in the process.

Santana is back inside and the Street Sweeper onto a pile of chairs plants Jake, only to have Dave come back in for the save. Four strikes to the face give us a quadruple knockdown with LAX getting the better of it. Some ladders and tables are set up at ringside but here’s Callihan to throw powder in Konnan’s face. He throws Ortiz onto a ladder and piledrives Santana through a table, giving OVE a double pin to retain at 10:21.

Rating: B-. Fun brawl, though they didn’t exactly hide the ending. It also doesn’t help that OVE was losing a fair fight when Sami came in. That should be a heel turn and given how this company goes, it really wouldn’t surprise me in the slightest. Good match though, with the violence being the focus, as it should have been.

Video on Gail Kim. Now you knew they were getting this in there somewhere.

From November 16. As in we’re skipping the title win, because that might put some focus on ANYONE other than Gail.

Gail comes out for her speech and Allie comes out as an invited guest. Kim talks about wanting to wrestle eighteen years ago and finding a wrestling school so she could do just that. We get the required YOU DESERVE IT chants, even though no one deserves as much praise as Gail gets around here. She thanks the women who helped pave the way to get her here (Trish Stratus, Lita, Molly Holly, Awesome Kong) and she’s at peace with her decision.

She’s vacating the title and can’t wait to see where things go from here. No interruption, nothing for anyone else and just Gail. I’m so glad she got this one last moment to add to her collection of other moments. There’s no denying that Gail is great but this company seems to think she’s Austin and Rock combined. Did I miss it when she became the biggest star the company has ever had?

Video on Moose/Stephan Bonnar vs. American Top Team.

Video on Johnny Impact vs. Eli Drake.

And we’ll close it out at Bound For Glory. Joined in progress again, but at least we got to talk about Gail Kim and TripleMania.

Impact Wrestling World Title: Eli Drake vs. Johnny Impact

Drake is defending and has Chris Adonis in his corner. Impact avoids a pre-bell jumping and starts fast with a clothesline. The champ bails to the floor so Johnny is right on him with a slingshot dive. A running flip kick off the apron has Drake in more trouble and a backdrop makes things even worse. Johnny adds a sliding German suplex as Josh says this is the first real test for Drake as champion. Keep in mind that Impact already had a title shot, making Josh sound dumber than usual.

Adonis gets in a cheap shot though and Drake takes over with an elbow off the apron. Drake keeps him outside and throws him into the barricade before choking with a boot. Back in and Drake gets two off a powerslam, followed by some elbow drops. They head outside again with Johnny kicking him in the face, knocking the champ into the post. Johnny’s leg hits post though and Drake takes it back inside.

That’s fine with Impact, who kicks him down and tries a moonsault, only to get elbowed for his efforts. A belly to back superplex drops Drake and another moonsault gets two. The standing shooting star gets the same as that leg seems just fine after hitting the post. Countdown to Impact misses as we’re just waiting on the ref bump/Alberto. Johnny kicks him in the head and goes up again, only to have Adonis offer a distraction.

This time it’s Drake running the corner for a superplex and another near fall. They head up at the same time this time around with Johnny scoring with a super Spanish Fly. That’s not enough either so Adonis throws Drake the belt. Johnny takes it away though and takes Adonis down, followed by Countdown to Impact for two. The Gravy Train is countered into a Shining Wizard but Drake sends him shoulder first into the post.

They head up again (fourth time) but Johnny kicks him down, setting up Starship Pain for two as Alberto pulls the referee out. That’s not a DQ for no logical reason so Johnny dives over the top at Alberto, hitting the referee by mistake. Alberto hits Drake with the belt before breaking a chair over Johnny’s head (Who needs PG?). Drake is pulled onto Johnny to retain the title at 19:49.

Rating: B-. Well Alberto looks like a big deal, Johnny looks like a choker and Drake and the title are now somewhere in the top seven or eight most important things in this company. This sets up Johnny vs. Alberto, but we have no one to challenge for the title. I mean, assuming we don’t get a triple threat out of this, which would be one of the least interesting things they could do. Alberto is clearly the focus of the promotion whether you like it or not, but he should be better now that he’s away from the horrible LAX feud. The match was good, but it was a long exercise in waiting for Alberto.

Josh wraps things up.

Overall Rating: D+. All this show did was show me how messed up Impact’s priorities really are. To recap: we can fit in the entire Gail Kim retirement ceremony and most of a match featuring Shark Boy and Scott Steiner, but we need to clip the main event of the biggest show of the year. Oh and make sure to have that big, long package on the main event of AAA’s biggest show of the year because of course. The lack of ANY kind of hype for next week’s huge show (a graphic or quick announcement wouldn’t have been hard) didn’t help either, making this the mess that I was expecting the Best of TNA to be.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume VI: July – December 1999 in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/11/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-and-thunder-reviews-volume-vi/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Impact Wrestling – November 16, 2017: Hey, He’s Canadian

Impact Wrestling
Date: November 16, 2017
Location: Aberdeen Pavilion, Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Jeremy Borash, Josh Matthews

We’re still in Ottawa, as will be the case for several more weeks. Tonight is about some followups to Bound For Glory as Gail Kim will be in the house for her first comments after winning the Knockouts Title, plus the return of American Top Team. I’m sure these won’t be bad segments that accomplish nothing and get us nowhere. Let’s get to it.

Gail Kim and American Top Team arrived earlier today.

Johnny Impact and Alberto El Patron have been banned from the building.

Eli Drake is ready to face Petey Williams, who should stick with the X-Division.

Taiji Ishimori/Caleb Konley/Trevor Lee vs. Sonjay Dutt/Dezmond Xavier/Garza Jr.

Lee uppercuts Dutt to start and Ishimori comes in to spin out of a wristlock. Dutt dropkicks Konley down so it’s back to Lee for the heel dominance. That goes nowhere so it’s off to Garza who cleans house and TAKES OFF HIS PANTS! Xavier hits a dive of his own but Ishimori hits running knees in the corner. Konley gets kicked in the ribs and Xavier’s Final Flash gives him the pin at 6:45.

Rating: C-. I’m running out of ways to say the X-Division guys aren’t interesting. This was your run of the mill match with some dives and nothing much else. I still have no reason to care about any of these people and Lee continues to be champion for no adequately explored reason. It’s good to start the show with a match though, especially something a little more entertaining than the other options.

OVE is ready to continue the fight against LAX.

Grand Championship: Fallah Bahh vs. Ethan Carter III

Carter is defending as I try to remember that the Grand Championship is a thing. Ethan tries some technical stuff to start before slapping Bahh in the back of the head. The huge Bahh sends him into the corner before easily shouldering him down. For some reason Carter tries a slam and gets slammed down for his efforts. A really bad rolling splash (as in Bahh gets a jogging start, drops, and rolls over Carter) puts Carter in the corner to end the first round. Bahh wins round one and runs Carter over to start the second.

A second charge only hits post though and Carter kicks him in the head. While Bahh regains his senses, Josh says you can go back sixteen years on the Global Wrestling Network. No Josh, you can’t. We hit a chinlock for a bit before a Stinger Splash has Bahh in more trouble. Another chinlock keeps Bahh down to end the round, which is won by Carter.

The third round starts after a break with Bahh winning a slugout until Carter hits a clothesline. It can’t take the big guy down but Bahh is barely standing. The required Samoan drop is enough for Josh to give the first minute of the round to Bahh. A belly to belly gets two on the champ, followed by a crossbody for no cover. Bahh goes to the middle rope but gets pulled down, allowing Carter to grab a rollup with his feet on the ropes to retain at 15:14.

Rating: D+. As usual, there is no reason whatsoever to have the rounds save for fake drama. Bahh is every fat monster who can’t do anything out of the ordinary while Carter is stuck waiting around for a better story. I’d be thrilled if they just turned the title back into the TV belt, assuming they’ll actually do anything with it. The specifics mean nothing if you can’t get anyone wanting the thing, which has always been the problem around here.

OVE/Sami Callihan vs. LAX

It’s a brawl to start with Ortiz hitting a cutter on Callihan and a backbreaker on Dave Crist, only to have Sami come back in to send Ortiz outside. That means a suicide dive and the brawl continues on the floor. Back in and Homicide can’t hit the Gringo Killer on Callihan, who kicks him low for a breather. Jake actually bothers with a tag as we take a break.

Back with Santana getting pummeled in the corner but fighting over for the hot tag to Ortiz. Everything breaks down again with LAX making the face comeback, including a Tower of London out of the corner to Dave. Callihan comes back in to help with a Stunner on Santana, followed by Jake’s tombstone for two. Ortiz comes back in for the Street Sweeper and the pin on Dave at 13:16.

Rating: C. So they can get rid of the Veterans of War (another team with a three letter nickname) because the tag division is just so deep at the moment. It certainly feels like LAX has turned face but without much of a moment to get them there. It also isn’t much of a face group when they have the numbers advantage, though why bother making sense when you can do a double turn for the sake of a double turn?

Here’s Dan Lambert with an envelope. He brags about how awesome MMA fighters are and how pathetic wrestlers are before going into a rant about the company moving to Canada. See, Canada has weak currency and Impact Wrestling wants some of that lame money. As for the point, Lashley was granted a release but for some reason the company never signed onto it.

Lambert has drafted a new release and just needs an executive to come sign off on it, otherwise the destruction will continue. Cue Moose to call Lambert dumb for giving his boys the night off, leaving him all alone here. Lashley comes out for the save, along with American Top Team, who you would have thought Moose would have noticed in the back. Cue James Storm to clean house without much effort, including a beer bottle over the head of one of the MMA fighters.

Storm grabs a mic to say he’s been training since 1996 and was told he would never be here. His mama told him to never give up and that’s what professional wrestling is. He mentions some of the tag teams he’s been in and that’s what wrestling is too. Storm talks about how awesome this place is to wrap it up.

Post break, KM wants to be part of American Top Team. Lashley tells him to prove himself.

Chris Adonis and Eli Drake tell Williams to try to make himself a Canadian hero. If Petey can last three minutes with the champ, he’ll be a Canadian hero. He won’t be World Champion though and that’s just a fact of life.

Allie thanks Gail Kim for being awesome.

Long video on Kim’s career. They’re really going to just send her out there, have her give a speech, and get no one else over aren’t they?

Gail comes out for her speech and Allie comes out as an invited guest. Kim talks about wanting to wrestle eighteen years ago and finding a wrestling school so she could do just that. We get the required YOU DESERVE IT chants, even though no one deserves as much praise as Gail gets around here. She thanks the women who helped pave the way to get her here (Trish Stratus, Lita, Molly Holly, Awesome Kong) and she’s at peace with her decision.

She’s vacating the title and can’t wait to see where things go from here. No interruption, nothing for anyone else and just Gail. I’m so glad she got this one last moment to add to her collection of other moments. There’s no denying that Gail is great but this company seems to think she’s Austin and Rock combined. Did I miss it when she became the biggest star the company has ever had?

Joseph Park comes up to catering and scares everyone off, save for Grado. Park begs forgiveness and blames Abyss. He gives Grado his visa because TNA doesn’t understand the idea of immigration either. A Mountie comes up to say Grado’s visa only counts in America so he’s being deported. Well that happened.

JB is in the ring to announce the main event so Jimmy Jacobs pops up on commentary. He takes a selfie with Josh and says he’ll stay as long as he feels welcome.

Impact Wrestling World Title: Petey Williams vs. Eli Drake

Drake is defending. Feeling out process to start with Drake bailing from the threat of a Canadian Destroyer. Back in and a headscissors takes the champ down, followed by the O Canada spot in the corner. We come back from a break with Drake getting two off a belly to back suplex and Adonis choking on the ropes.

A tilt-a-whirl powerslam and a jumping elbow get two on Petey and we hit the reverse chinlock. Drake cuts off a comeback with a clothesline, only to miss a middle rope knee drop. The slingshot Codebreaker gives Petey two and a running knee to the face drops Drake again. The Canadian Destroyer doesn’t work so we hit the Sharpshooter in the middle of the ring instead.

Rating: B. Good match, albeit one without much drama. As soon as Drake kicked out of the one weapon Petey had, any doubt went flying out the window. I’m fine with Williams getting a one off title match but I really don’t need him getting a spot in the main event scene because “hey, he’s Canadian”.

Overall Rating: C+. There were some problems here and there but this was one of their best shows in a long time. First of all, everything was about Impact, as in there was no footage from other promotions to pad things out. Couple that with a good main event and some angle advancement (Storm as Moose’s partner is completely acceptable) and Grado being gone and it’s a good night. Unfortunately I have no reason to believe this will last but I’ll enjoy it while I can.

Results

Sonjay Dutt/Dezmond Xavier/Garza Jr. b. Taiji Ishimori/Caleb Konley/Trevor Lee – Final Flash to Konley

Ethan Carter III b. Fallah Bahh – Rollup with feet on the ropes

LAX b. OVE/Sami Callihan – Street Sweeper to Dave

Eli Drake b. Petey Williams – Gravy Train

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

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