WWE Vault – Fatal Fourway Collection: What A Nice Surprise

Fatal Four Way Collection
Commentators: Jim Ross, Tazz, Joey Styles, Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler, Cyrus, Joey Styles, Byron Saxton, Renee Young, Tom Phillips, Nigel McGuinness, Vic Joseph, Aiden English, Jim Cornette

I have no idea why this is something that was necessary, though if you can run a pay per view about it, you can do this too. In this case, I’m not sure how interesting this is going to be as the concept can get tiring rather quickly. Hopefully the action is enough to keep things moving for over two hours so let’s get to it.

From Rebellion 2000.

WWF Title: Kurt Angle vs. Rikishi vs. The Rock vs. Steve Austin

Angle is defending, no countouts or DQ’s and this is Evil Rikishi. The fact that Angle comes out second tells you about where he’s standing at the moment. The brawl is on to start fast with Rock and Rikishi fighting out to the floor, leaving Austin to hit a spinebuster for two on Angle. Rikishi pulls Austin outside so we can switch off a bit, leaving Rock to Samoan drop Angle for two more.

Back up and Rock sends Angle flying over the top as Rikishi and Austin come back in. That means Rikishi gets caught between the superheroes for a bunch of right hands, followed by some double stomping. Angle tries to leave, which doesn’t work for Rock, even if that’s not the wisest move. Austin Thesz presses Rikishi for the right hands and Rock sends Angle back in for a Thesz press from Austin as well.

Angle and Austin head to the floor again with Austin using a cable to choke on the announcers’ table. Rikishi crushes Rock in the corner but the Stinkface is blocked with a well timed low blow. The People’s Elbow gets two, with Angle having to come in for the save. We slow down a bit as the heels take over in something of a mini tag match. As you might expect, Rock and Austin fight back rather quickly and it’s time for the big staredown.

Austin gets the better of things but Rock punches his way out of the corner. That just earns him a Stunner for two with Angle making another save. Tazz: “I cannot believe that Austin just Stunned the Rock.” As I try to figure out why that would confuse him, Austin stomps Angle down in the corner.

That takes too long though and it’s a Rock Bottom for two, with Rikishi pulling the referee out. Back in and the Angle Slam gets a VERY delayed two on Rock but here are Edge and Christian to help Angle. Austin beats them up and it’s a Rock Bottom to Rikishi, with Edge making the save. Cue the Radicalz as Austin Stuns Rikishi for two, with Saturn making the save. Another Angle Slam pins Rikishi to retain the title at 8:50.

Rating: B-. It was fun while it lasted but it didn’t last very long. Rikishi as a big time heel never worked and he was clearly going to be the one to take the fall the second he was introduced. That’s not a terrible thing though, especially for a special England only pay per view in the first place. The rest of the match was your usual stuff and given the circumstances, that was acceptable enough.

From ECW On Sci Fi, August 28, 2007.

The Miz vs. CM Punk vs. Big Daddy V vs. Boogeyman

For a future shot at the ECW Title. V jumps Boogeyman so Miz and Punk jump V, who shrugs all three of them off at once. We get the Boogeyman vs. V showdown but Miz pulls Boogeyman outside. That leaves Punk to dive on V, who throws him outside for the big crash. V beats on Miz and Punk outside but misses a charge and crashes over the barricade.

Punk gets sent into the steps though and Miz is there to jump Boogeyman back inside. Miz’s running corner clothesline gets two on Punk and we hit the chinlock, which is kind of nutty in a four way. Punk is back up with the running knee and bulldog, followed by the top rope clothesline for two. The GTS finishes Miz at 7:07.

Rating: C. This was a really weird choice as it basically turned into a singles match with about three minutes to go. Boogeyman and V just vanished from the thing and never showed up again. I kept waiting for one of them to do something but instead it was just punk shrugging off Miz’s offense and beating him. That’s a fine way to go, but what a weird way to get there.

Post match V beats up Boogeyman as they magically reappear.

From Capital Carnage.

Steve Austin vs. Mankind vs. vs. Kane vs. Undertaker

Yeah that’s a lineup. Gerald Brisco is guest referee and Big Boss Man is guest enforcer. Kane goes after Mankind before the other two come to the ring but the lights go out for Undertaker’s rather slow paced entrance. The brawl continues throughout the lengthy entrance, with the camera on Undertaker because the wrestling itself is just a detail. They finally stop fighting but Kane knocks Mankind into a chokeslam from Undertaker, leaving the monsters to brawl.

Kane is sent outside and here is Austin as the fight is on again. Undertaker and Austin fight on the ramp and then come back to ringside as Vince McMahon is rather nervous on commentary. With Austin down, Undertaker switches off to Mankind but Austin (still in his vest) is back up and sent inside. Undertaker joins him and gets hit in the face, followed by some choking with the vest.

The jumping clothesline hits Austin (Vince: “YEAH BOY!”) for two as Mankind keeps punching Kane on the floor. Paul Bearer goes JJ Dillon with a shoe to Austin’s head but Austin is back up with a Thesz press to Undertaker. Austin covers and Brisco hurts his knee (doesn’t feel like a screwjob), allowing Kane to make the save. All four finally get inside for the first time a mere seven minutes in and Undertaker and Mankind are outside seven and a half minutes in. The other two go outside and Vince gets mad at Mankind for not attacking Austin.

Back in and Kane chokes Undertaker in the corner while the other two are down. Kane goes after Mankind as JR and Vince get in a spat over Austin. Old School is broken up and Undertaker gets crotched on top, sending the two of them to the floor. Mankind offers Austin a handshake but gets kicked in the ribs, meaning it’s time for the Mandible Claw. Undertaker crotches Mankind against the post and Austin gets double teamed by the giants. We’ll make that triple teamed but Austin fights back, with a chair being brought in.

Mankind breaks up a spoke Tombstone onto the chair but gets his head cracked by Undertaker’s chair shot. Austin covers but Brisco just stops counting. Mankind and Undertaker go outside so Austin hits the Stunner on Kane. Brisco needs to know the time, so Austin decks him down. Undertaker is back in with chokeslams to Austin and Kane, with a regular referee coming in to count as Mankind makes the save. Austin Stuns Kane again for the pin at 16:11.

Rating: B-. This was longer than it needed to be and dragged in the middle, but it felt like a pay per view main event rather than a spruced up house show match. Austin winning is of course the only way to go, though I was expecting Mankind to take the fall. Good enough stuff here, though trimming off three minutes or so would have helped.

From ECW Heat Wave 2000.

Little Guido vs. Psicosis vs. Yoshihiro Tajiri

This doesn’t fit the bill so here is Mikey Whipwreck to make it better.

Little Guido vs. Psicosis vs. Yoshihiro Tajiri vs. Mikey Whipwreck

Yeah that works. They start by kicking each other in the head (shocking I know), with Guido kicking Tajiri out to the floor. Whipwreck hurricanranas Guido and Stuns Tajiri, followed by the running flip dive to the floor. Cue Tony Mamaluke, who gets taken down by Whipwreck. For some reason, Whipwreck dives onto the 500lb Big Sal and is quickly posted. Psicosis hits the guillotine legdrop and Guido pins Whipwreck for the elimination at 1:36.

So that leaves us with the original match, with Tajiri hurricanranaing Psicosis. Guido pulls Psicosis to the floor so Tajiri can hit a nice Asai moonsault onto the two of them. Back in and Tajiri superplexes Guido so Psicosis can hit a somersault legdrop for two (that’s a surprising kickout). An Unprettier hits Psicosis and Tajiri’s bridging German suplex gives Tajiri the pin at 4:28.

We’re down to Guido vs. Tajiri, with the latter kicking him down and getting two off another suplex. The handspring elbow connects and it’s time for a chair (of course). Guido fights back with a Sicilian Slice and kicks Tajiri outside. That lets Guido flip off the fans but the Unprettier is broken up as well. Instead Tajiri kicks him down and hits the brainbuster onto the chair for the pin at 9:18.

Rating: C+. I’m not a huge fan of the “let’s add someone in just so we can eliminate them in a hurry and then get back to the original match”. It just makes me wonder what the point of the addition was in the first place and that was the case here. At least Psicosis was there instead of Super Crazy, as that three way dance had been done to death.

From Insurrextion 2001.

Hardy Boyz vs. X Factor vs. Dudley Boyz vs. Edge And Christian

Elimination rules. Albert is here with X Factor and grabs Bubba’s leg to start, allowing Credible to hammer away. That works in a grand total of no way as Bubba fights back and knocks Credible into the corner. Matt and Christian come in with Christian getting the better of things until Matt neckbreakers his way out of trouble. Jeff comes in to quite the reaction and crossbodies Edge for two.

It’s off to X-Pac to take over on Jeff, who snaps off a headscissors and it’s back to Matt. X-Pac is right back with a crotching against the post, followed by a Bronco Buster. Matt double clotheslines X-Factor down and Jeff comes in to clean house. Everything breaks down and Jeff misses Poetry In Motion. Matt gives X-Pac the Twist Of Fate and, after Albert misses a splash, Jeff drops a Swanton for the elimination at 5:48. X Factor beats up Matt, leaving Christian to Unprettier Jeff for the pin at 6:03.

We’re down to Edge And Christian vs. the Dudleys with the Canadians being whipped into each other. D-Von powerslams Christian for two but gets caught with a backbreaker. It’s off to Edge for a hard whip into the corner but D-Von manages a middle rope clothesline. The referee doesn’t see the tag to Bubba though and Christian is right back with another backbreaker.

The reverse inverted DDT plants Christian though and NOW we get the big tag off to Bubba. House is quickly cleaned, including What’s Up to Edge. It’s time for a table, which knocks Edge And Christian down, only for Rhyno to run in and Gore Bubba. Edge steals the pin at 13:21.

Rating: B-. Speaking of matches that had been done to death, I present you with the tag division from this period. As great as the three main teams were, there comes a point of GET SOMEONE ELSE ALREADY. X-Factor wasn’t much of an addition as they were out in about five minutes, leaving us with the same stuff we’ve seen for WAY too long. The action was fine as usual, but mix it up a bit.

Post match the table is set up but Spike Dudley is here to cut Rhyno off.

From NXT Takeover: Fatal Fourway.

NXT Title: Adrian Neville vs. Tyler Breeze vs. Sami Zayn vs. Tyson Kidd

Neville is defending and it’s one fall to a finish. They’re rather tentative to start with no major contact in the first minute. We pair off with Kidd hammering on Neville and Zayn fighting out of the corner to beat up Breeze. That’s broken up and it’s down to Zayn vs. Neville, which is what people seem rather interested in seeing. The other two come back in to break it up and everyone goes outside for a slugout.

Zayn stops for a quick photo with Breeze’s phone, which he throws inside. Kidd switches off and takes Zayn inside, where Zayn is right back with a Koji Clutch. Breeze breaks that up and a double suplex puts Neville down on the stage. It’s Zayn coming in to cut Kidd off, earning himself a double suplex onto the ramp. Back in and Zayn gets double teamed as we slow down a good bit. Neville tries to make the save and gets kicked outside but Kidd sends Breeze outside as the alliance is done.

Kidd keeps knocking people out to the floor before kicking Zayn in the back for two. A legdrop in the ropes gives Kidd two and Neville gets knocked off the apron as a bonus. Kidd’s running dropkick in the Tree of Woe gets two on Zayn and we hit the chinlock. Neville finally comes back in to break it up (because a chinlock needs to be broken up) but Breeze takes Neville down. Zayn is back up as Neville hits a top rope springboard moonsault to take out the villains.

Neville’s big handspring elbow is countered into…I’m not sure but it’s kind of a backdrop. Kidd catapults Zayn into Neville but can’t get Zayn in the Sharpshooter. He can however kick Zayn in the head, only for Breeze to come back in with some Supermodel Kicks for two each. Breeze takes Neville up top, with Kidd joining Breeze, meaning Zayn can come in to make it a Tower Of Doom.

Zayn gets two and then erupts on Kidd in the corner. Neville gets a boot up to stop a charging Zayn in the corner, setting up the Red Arrow. Breeze steals the cover for two and the freak out on the near fall is great. Kidd is back up with a Sharpshooter on Breeze, with Neville having to dive in to stop the tap, leaving Zayn to make the save. Zayn exploders Kidd into the corner before sending Neville over the barricade. The diving DDT takes Breeze out on the floor again and the Helluva Kick hits Kidd…but Neville pulls the referee at two. Neville takes Zayn out and the Red Arrow retains the title at 24:12.

Rating: B+. I was kind of expecting this one to be included and I’m glad that it was. This was around the time when NXT was becoming a major force and that made for some interesting matches such as this one. If nothing else, it makes me sad to see how far Tyler Breeze fell, as he should have been a much bigger deal than he was after such a great run on NXT.

From the 2019 Royal Rumble Kickoff Show.

Cruiserweight Title: Kalisto vs. Akira Tozawa vs. Hideo Itami vs. Buddy Murphy

Murphy is defending and they trade the early rollups to start. Tozawa gets a Black Widow on Murphy but Kalisto is in for a rather springboardy hurricanrana. Murphy blocks it with raw power but gets dropkicked outside by Tozawa. Back up and Murphy pulls Kalisto’s dive out of the air for a suplex onto the floor.

That leaves Itami in the ring for the showdown, with Murphy coming in to trade kicks to the back. Itami wins a slugout and stomps him down in the corner, meaning it’s time to scream a lot. Tozawa and Kalisto are back up with some dives to take Murphy down, leaving Itami as the only one standing. Kalisto is back up to catapult Tozawa onto Murphy on the floor for quite the landing.

Back in and Kalisto strikes away for two on Itami as things slow back down a bit. Tozawa and Murphy take their place with Murphy down, only for Itami to break up the top rope backsplash. Tozawa’s hurricanrana driver plants Itami and Tozawa follows with a big dive to the floor. Murphy is back up with a big running flip dive onto everyone else, followed by a nasty sitout powerbomb to Kalisto.

Tozawa makes the save but Murphy rolls through a high crossbody. That’s fine with Tozawa, who poisonranas Murphy for two, with Itami stealing the near fall. The Salida Del Sol gives Kalisto two on Itami, meaning it’s time for the four way slugout. Itami and Murphy are left standing with Murphy getting the better of things, including Murphy’s Law to retain at 12:04.

Rating: B. This was a good choice for the last match before the show started as it was about throwing a bunch of people out there and letting them go nuts. Murphy was feeling it as champion at this point as he didn’t wrestle like a cruiserweight and that made things all the better for him. Tozawa wasn’t a total goof yet either and Kalisto had some chops of his own, making this a nice mixture of talent.

From Monday Night Raw, December 1, 1997.

D’Lo Brown vs. Miguel Perez Jr. vs. Chainz vs. Recon

Elimination rules. This is from Gang Warz so there are all kinds of people at ringside. Brown hammers on Chainz to start but Chainz is back with some elbows. Recon (Bull Buchanan) comes in with a hurricanrana, which has Cornette impressed. Brown comes back in to drop Recon and it’s back to Chainz to hammer away a bit. A big boot staggers Recon and Brown punches him into Chainz’s Death Valley Driver for the pin at 2:09.

Brown comes in and gets clotheslined down so it’s off to Perez, who is knocked down just as fast. A quick rollup gives Perez the pin on Brown at 3:14 and we’re down to one on one. The Death Valley Driver connects but everyone comes in and the match is thrown out at 3:37.

Rating: D+. What in the world was the point of adding this? I was thinking the collection was ending with the cruiserweight match and then some angle but instead we get this tacked on mess which doesn’t even have a winner. It’s such a weird way to go and it’s not like this was anything memorable. It’s certainly out of nowhere though and that’s kind of the fun from something like this.

The big brawl ends the show.

Overall Rating: B-. This was MUCH better than I was expecting, as it was one of the collections that I was dreading and it wound up being a lot of fun. The thing that makes these collections work is how much they mix things up and that’s what you got here, with some stuff from different promotions and a variety of eras. I had fun with this and it was one of the nicer surprises. It’s not my favorite format, but they made this work, even without an entry from the FATAL FOUR WAY pay per view. Even WWE forgot about that mess.

 

 

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Smackdown – September 16, 1999 (2024 Edition): He Actually Did It

Smackdown
Date: September 16, 1999
Location: Thomas And Mack Center, Las Vegas, Nevada
Attendance: 8,219
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

We’re getting closer to Unforgiven and in this case everything is crashing down around HHH. While he survived a title match with Steve Austin on Raw, Vince McMahon is back after HHH went after Linda McMahon. That can’t end well, but we still don’t have a #1 contender to the pay per view in ten days. Let’s get to it.

Here is Raw if you need a recap.

We open with the referees on strike over unsafe working conditions. Why do wrestling promotions think stories about referees are interesting?

Opening sequence.

Here is Steve Austin to get things going. Just because he got disqualified against HHH on Raw doesn’t mean that they’re done with each other by a long shot. When HHH beat him in the knee with a chair, he should have done that much more, because HHH didn’t get the job done. Austin wants a rematch right here tonight and we should make it No Holds Barred.

Or if HHH wants to do this the hard way, Austin can just beat him so badly that he’s going to the hospital. Cue HHH and Chyna, with a bunch of cops backing them up. HHH says that’s not happening because Austin has to go to the back of the line. The title will be defended tonight though, against a main eventer of HHH’s choice. Austin promises to follow HHH all night and it’s going to involve his foot going….well you get the idea.

HHH will officially defend the title in a Six Pack Challenge at Unforgiven after the five way match went to a no contest. That’s a heck of a way to jump from nothing to something.

Here is Shane McMahon, who calls out Joey Abs because of what Joey said about Stephanie McMahon on Raw. Cue the Mean Street Posse, with Terri, so Shane dives onto Joey to start fast.

Shane McMahon vs. Joey Abs

There’s no referee because of the strike, making me wonder why the bell ring if there was no one to call it. The rest of the Posse jumps Shane before going outside as Stephanie and Test are watching in the back. Here is Gerald Brisco to count two off Shane’s rollup and another two off Joey’s suplex.

Shane’s jumping back elbow gets two but Briscoe gets in a fight with Pete Gas on the floor. Rodney comes in to beat on Shane, who fights the off as Pat Patterson, in shorts, comes out to count two on Joey, with Rodney breaking that up as well. Shane hits a corkscrew Swanton (close to a Spinal Tap) for the pin with Shawn Stasiak of all people coming in as the third referee.

Rating: C-. A match between Shane McMahon and a member of the Mean Street Posse, which didn’t even last four minutes, had three referees, two people interfering, and two fights involving some of those referees, who were replacements because the referees are on strike. That’s about as 1999 as you can get and it’s rather exhausting to keep track of all this stuff. That being said, the place was going nuts for Shane, which is one of the reasons he was around so often.

Post match Stephanie comes out and drops Joey again.

Here is Women’s Champion Ivory, who is SO EXCITED that actress/model Cindy Margolis is here. She invites Cindy into the ring and gushes over Cindy’s beauty and star power. Ivory asks Cindy to do one of the poses she gets downloaded on her website but Cindy declines. That doesn’t work for Ivory, who threatens violence if it doesn’t happen. Cindy eventually does it…and here is Jeff Jarrett to put Cindy in the Figure Four, with Cindy kind of begging him not to and then grabbing her knee. Jarrett Figure Fours Ivory for a bonus.

HHH, in trunks but without elbow pads for a weird look, says he won’t be defending against Steve Austin.

European Title: Mark Henry vs. Steve Blackman

Henry is defending after skipping a tag match with Blackman on Raw. Tony Garea is referee as Blackman kicks Henry down without much trouble. Cue Val Venis with a kendo stick to Blackman though, allowing Henry to get the easy pin.

Post match D’Lo Brown comes in and Sky Highs Henry (that wasn’t bad).

Jeff Jarrett yells at Cindy Margolis as she is put in an ambulance. Test comes in for the brawl.

Post break Jarrett challenges Test to a match tonight.

Here is Chris Jericho, with Curtis Hughes, for a chat. Jericho declares himself one bad mamma jamma and says Ken Shamrock has finally admitted defeat. Shamrock has begged him to make sure that they never meet face to face again and then licked the dust off Jericho’s boots in gratitude. He’s also begged Hughes to not rip him limb from limb, but Jericho is allowing Hughes to take his place against Shamrock tonight. That’s not all though, because Jericho has a special guest referee for this match: the masked Mexican legend, El Dopo!

Curtis Hughes vs. Ken Shamrock

Chris Jericho is on commentary as Shamrock takes Hughes down and strikes away. Hughes takes him to the floor for a drop onto the barricade as Cole dares to ask Jericho why he won’t face Shamrock. With that nonsense out of the way, Shamrock fights up and sends Hughes into various steel objects. Jericho offers a distraction though and Hughes cuts Shamrock off so the double teaming can be on. Back in and Hughes drops an elbow for two but Shamrock kneebars him. Hughes grabs the rope so Dopo immediately calls for the DQ.

Post match Shamrock is livid and unmasks Dopo as Howard Finkel, which was fairly obvious as soon as he came into the arena.

Mankind is expecting total mayhem in the five man Royal Rumble, but he and Rock will be working as a team. They’re like an automobile, with Rock being a fine engine and Mankind being the one who holds the bags. Yes he’s the rear end, but he’s the People’s Rear End. And he doesn’t like HHH either!

Remember how the referees were on strike earlier today? They’re still on strike.

Royal Rumble

Five entrants, because we need 1/6 size Royal Rumble with one minute intervals. Rock is in at #1 and talks about how Big Show, Kane or Undertaker need to go play the People’s Slow Machine to land three Brahma Bulls. You’d see Undertaker, with his Mickey Mouse tattoos and his 33lb head jumping around like a girl, Kane doing cartwheels and using his voicebox to say “I won, I won, let’s party”, and Big Show just scaring people in general.

Then the Rock himself would arrive, watch the tears stream down their cheeks, and gather up all the gold coins that they won and…well you know the bit. Anyway, after that whole thing, which I remember reciting with my friends when I was 11 because it was the funniest thing I had ever heard at the time, Big Show is in at #2 and we’re ready to go.

Rock strikes away to start but gets sent face first into the buckle to cut him off. Mankind ins in at #3 and the double teaming has Show in trouble. After what felt like a rather quick minute, Kane is in at #4 so Rock hammers away on him as Show chokes Mankind in the corner. Undertaker, in street clothes, is in at #5 to complete the field but he sits in on commentary rather than getting inside. The other four brawl, with Mankind clotheslining Kane out, only to get thrown out by Rock. Show hits a chokeslam on Rock but can’t throw him out, which is enough for Undertaker to get in the ring and dump them both for the win.

Rating: C-. What is there to say about a match like this? It wasn’t long and ended with something of a screwy finish as Undertaker did one thing and won the match. There was nothing but bragging rights on the line and that doesn’t leave much in the way of interest. Having the star power in there helped, but you need something more interesting for those stars to do.

Post match Mideon and Viscera come in to help Show beat Rock down.

Here are the Hollys to say Chyna has had more than enough time to find a partner. Cue Chyna, who is going to do this on her own.

Hollys vs. Chyna

Chyna forearms Crash (whose gear says HARDCORE HOLLY) to start so it’s quickly off to Hardcore (whose gear also says HARDCORE HOLLY). A shot to the face staggers Hardcore as well and it’s a double low blow to put the cousins down. Hardcore takes Chyna down and here is Billy Gunn to join in as Chyna’s partner. That doesn’t go well to start as a double elbow to the face puts Chyna down and Hardcore adds a suplex. Chyna DDTs her way to freedom though and it’s Gunn coming in to clean house. The Fameasser is good for the fast pin.

Rating: C. Another nothing mach but at least it was long enough to rate for once. In theory Chyna would want to go it alone here and isn’t likely to be happy with Gunn for making the save. The match was just kind of there to give Chyna a reason to get mad, and there are worse options available.

Post match Chyna yells at Gunn, as she didn’t want help, but here is Jeff Jarrett to hit her in the back with a frying pan and cover her with an apron. Jarrett gives her a soup ladle and the frying pan, saying now all she has to do is start fixing him supper.

Big Boss Man, with a bag labeled “DOGGIE BAG” is ready for….the Pepper On A Pole match. Sweet goodness can Russo quit already?

Big Boss Man vs. Al Snow

Pepper On A Pole, because this is a thing. Snow stops away to start and hits the trapping headbutts (strong grapple plus up plus B) but it’s too early to get the bag. Boss Man catches a diving Snow and then hits him with the nightstick. Cue the rottweilers from Raw with the British Bulldog for a distraction, allowing Boss Man to grab the bag…which doesn’t count as he throws it to the floor, allowing Snow to grab it for the win. The remains of a dog on a pole match involving the British Bulldog leading a team of rottweilers is the match that SETS UP the big gimmick match between these two. For the Hardcore Title.

HHH and Chyna are in the back, with Steve Austin stalking them.

Intercontinental Title: Jeff Jarrett vs. Test

Jarrett, with Miss Kitty and Debra, is defending. Test kicks him in the face to start but Jarrett comes back as the Mean Street Posse comes out. A powerslam plants Jarrett as Stephanie, Shane and the Stooges come out to brawl as everything is thrown out. The fans of course want puppies.

Post match the brawl stays on and Jarrett damages Test’s shoulder. Shane saves Stephanie from Jarrett’s Figure Four.

Here is HHH, with Chyna to defend the WWF Title and there are a bunch of cops on the stage, presumably to cut off an invading Steve Austin. We cut to the back where Stephanie McMahon and Test (with his bad shoulder) are leaving, which writes Test out of the list of possible challengers. HHH says he gets to pick the guest referee, so he would like Shane McMahon to get out here.

With Shane here, HHH says he won’t be facing Undertaker, Big Show or Kane, which leaves the Rock. Since Rock has an obsession with putting things in a certain place on various people, Rock can kiss HHH’s so it’s not him. That leaves one option, and it’s someone with testicles thee size of grapefruits (Lawler: “ME???”).

HHH calls out Vince McMahon and is willing to put the title on the line to get a piece of him. We cut to the back, where Vince doesn’t want to do it but HHH suggests doing, uh, things, with Linda McMahon, which is enough to get Vince out here. Vince still says no but HHH tells him to go hide behind his skirt. HHH throws in that he can keep it up with Linda all night long and that’s enough to start the match.

WWF Title: HHH vs. Vince McMahon

Vince is challenging and hammers away in the corner, only for HHH to stomp him down without much effort. The comeback is cut off again and referee Shane McMahon does not approve. HHH fires off some shoulders in the corner and stomps Vince down even more, allowing Chyna to get in a cheap shot of her own as the beating continues.

They go outside with HHH choking with a camera cable. HHH beats him onto the announcers’ table and drops an elbow through it, with Shane’s pleas to stop not getting him anywhere. Back in and Chyna hands HHH a chair, allowing him to shove Shane down and blast Vince in the head. Shane tackles HHH down and hammers away so Chyna comes in for the save, with HHH chairing Shane in the head as well.

Cue Linda McMahon and the Stooges, with the men getting beaten down too. Chyna holds Linda so she has to watch HHH beat on the bloody Vince. The Pedigree is loaded up and heeeeere’s Austin to beat HHH down. HHH and Chyna get a Stunner each…and Austin puts Vince on top so Shane can count the pin to make Vince champion. As Austin’s music plays.

Rating: C. The match was little more than a squash until Austin came in at the end, making this the second time Austin has caused a title change in such a similar way this year (after the famous Mankind win). Vince barely got in any offense but there is nothing wrong with that kind of a story in small doses. After Vince was around the main event scene for so long, having him win the title isn’t the biggest shock, especially on a fluke like this. It was fun, and that’s what it needed to be.

HHH chases Austin through the crowd as Vince is helped up. Brisco jumps up and down to celebrate as the show ends. This was such goofy fun and Vince was always right in the middle of everything that having him win the title, even on a fluke like this, was rather entertaining.

Overall Rating: C. The ending didn’t save the show but it was good enough to carry it across the finish line. Above all else, there are still too many completely insane things going on (Pepper On A Pole) but things like Chris Jericho and Shane McMahon are bringing things up a bit. Austin is at his usual incredibleness and the show is still working, but dang they could be so much better if they got rid of some of the nonsense.

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Smackdown – September 9, 1999: He Flew

Smackdown
Date: September 9, 1999
Location: Pepsi Arena, Albany, New York
Attendance: 10,183
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

We’re still on the way to Unforgiven and I’m not exactly sure what is going on with the show’s card. The main story seems to be focusing around the Tag Team Titles and maybe HHH vs. The Rock and Mankind, but tonight Rock and Mankind are defending against Big Show and Undertaker in a tag team Buried Alive match, because that’s a thing. Let’s get to it.

Here is Raw if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

We cut to the parking lot, where HHH and Chyna attack Kane (it’s so strange to see him in street clothes) until Big Show makes the save. Show gets dropped with a low blow and everyone leaves.

Here is Big Show to ask who is the top dog now. Yeah he fed Al Snow’s dog to him, because no one is crazier than he is. If he’s that crazy, then he’ll fight any dog in the back who wants the Hardcore Title.

Hardcore Title: Big Boss Man vs. British Bulldog

The Bulldog is challenging in his first appearance in two years and has a terrible remix of Rule Britannia. They immediately fight into the crowd, with Boss Man taking over. Back in the ring and Boss Man’s chair shot is blocked, allowing Bulldog to get in a nightstick shot to win the title.

Post match Al Snow, now as Leif Cassidy (dig that Rockers’ theme) comes to the ring and shoves the paper he wrote on Monday into Boss Man’s mouth. Bulldog hands the title to Snow and leaves as apparently we have another new champion.

Kane pours gasoline on HHH’s car. Post break, HHH and Chyna try to save the car but get covered in gas as well. They thankfully run off, with Kane giving chase.

Edge and Christian vs. New Brood

For some reason Steven Richards, dressed in an old Christian Gothic shirt, is here with Edge and Christian, while Gangrel is here with the New Brood. Matt runs Edge over to start but Edge snaps off a hurricanrana to even things up. Jeff comes in to anklescissors Christian down as commentary talks about how Steve Austin might be around tonight. Edge is sent outside though and Jeff scores with a big dive to take him down.

Back in and Matt hits a top rope Lionsault for no cover, instead opting to hammer away and take his shirt off. The Hardys’ flip splash/fist drop combination gets two but the top rope splash/legdrop combination completely misses. Christian comes back in and everything breaks down, with Poetry In Motion hitting Christian in the corner. Gangrel tries to come in but Richards cuts him off as Jeff accidentally clotheslines Matt on the floor. Back in and a side slam/reverse DDT combination gives Edge the pin on Jeff.

Rating: C+. As has been the case in recent weeks, Edge and Christian are really starting to feel it in the ring. At the same time, I’m not sure who looks at the Hardys and thinks it makes sense to have them be heels. They’re as much of the young stars who could have a gaggle of female fans around them as can be so let’s put him with the evil vampire? Anyway, nice match here, which shouldn’t be a surprise.

Post match the Bloodbath is loaded up but here is Kane to wreck a bunch of people instead. Kane grabs the mic and promises to burn HHH tonight.

British Bulldog won’t talk about what he did tonight and leaves the arena.

X-Pac arrives and is looking for Kane.

HHH promises to make Kane bleed and he’s got the sledgehammer to make it happen. He’s also got the title, and Kane can come get it.

Here is X-Pac for a chat and he gets right to the point by calling Kane to the ring. Tonight, Kane needs to get his mind right because he can be the WWF Champion, but he’s doing it without X-Pac. As we see Big Show and Undertaker watching in the back, X-Pac says Kane interfered last week when asked not to, so the team is over.

Some masked men, who are certainly NOT Chris Jericho and Howard Finkel, arrive while speaking Spanish.

Here are the Hollys, with Hardcore saying he wants a heavyweight fight. He wants some “googly eyed monkey” to come down here and get in this ring, as long as they meet the requirements. Cue Chyna of all people, but Hardcore isn’t sure about this. Even with the extra silicon included, she might make the requirements, but he isn’t facing a woman. Chyna hits him in the back with the scale and it seems that they are indeed fighting.

Hardcore Holly vs. Chyna

Crash Holly is here with Hardcore and gets knocked off the apron to start. Crash’s distraction lets Hardcore get in a shot but Chyna DDTs him down. Cue Jeff Jarrett to jump Chyna for the DQ.

Post match Billy Gunn runs in for the save. Then he gives Chyna the Fameasser. Then the Hollys fight again, as is their custom.

X-Pac leaves.

Kane broods.

The Rock and Mankind arrive, with Mankind seemingly not liking having to ride in the trunk of Rock’s limo. Also, it doesn’t matter what Mankind thinks of his new shirt. Mankind: “I gotta steal that one sometime.”

Bradshaw vs. Bubba Ray Dudley

Faarooq and D-Von Dudley are here too. They start fighting (duh) and go to the floor without much trouble. Bubba sends him into the steps to take over but Bradshaw kicks him in the face back inside. The big clothesline drops Bubba as commentary tries to figure out why he has such a speech impediment. D-Von comes in for the fast DQ.

Big Boss Man is livid at Al Snow.

Here are Test and Stephanie McMahon for a chat. Stephanie calls out Linda McMahon and the Stooges for a special announcement, so here they are post haste. Apparently Stephanie and “Andrew” (still weird to hear) have set their wedding date for October 11, and all of the fans are invited (So do they get a ticket to the show?). Cue the Mean Street Posse and Terri Runnels to interrupt for a staredown, but Stephanie isn’t having that.

Cue Shane McMahon to call off the Posse, because the war with Test is over. With the Posse gone, Shane talks about how he owes Stephanie an apology, because she is a woman and not a baby anymore. He thought everything he was doing was the right thing but he was wrong. Go with his blessing and marry Andrew, but he better always do the right thing and treat her right. Test shakes his hand and Shane hugs Stephanie. Well that was sudden.

The Rock, with Mankind, seems to flirt with Lilian Garcia, before sending her away. They’re ready to bury Big Show and Undertaker tonight. Mankind likes it as well, to the tune of Stayin Alive.

WWF Title: HHH vs. Kane

HHH, with Chyna (with sledgehammer), is defending. Kane (in the swanky inverted red and black gear) comes out with a blowtorch, which can’t end well. HHH and Chyna jump him as he enters but Kane clotheslines his way to freedom. Some right hands put HHH down in the corner and a clothesline lets Kane hammer away even more.

HHH gets in a single shot but dives into a choke, only to have Chyna say she can talk to X-Pac for Kane. The distraction lets HHH get in a low blow, followed by the jumping knee for two. Kane starts fighting up and hits a bulldog of all things, setting up the top rope clothesline. The facebuster cuts Kane off but the Pedigree is countered with a backdrop. The chokeslam connects but Chyna gets in a sledgehammer shot from behind. That’s enough for a Pedigree to retain the title.

Rating: B-. There were some shenanigans here, but some interference from a manager and a sledgehammer shot (which granted does sound rather ridiculous when you say it out loud) is rather minor by comparison. Kane is a star who can be put in a spot like this to make a top villain sweat and that is what he was here. HHH racks up another pin over another former World Champion though and that’s a good idea for his title reigns.

Post match here are Undertaker and Kane to chase off Chyna and HHH, followed by a stare at Kane.

Ken Shamrock is looking for Chris Jericho. You might try the ring as you have a scheduled match.

Ken Shamrock vs. Chris Jericho

Hold on though as there is no Jericho, so Shamrock has to threaten to come to the back and drag him out here. Shamrock goes up the ramp but Jericho’s music starts playing. Cue Jericho in the ring….in a shark cage, which is for Shamrock’s safety. Jericho shows us a photo of him putting Shamrock in the Walls last week but Shamrock takes the baseball bat that Jericho is carrying. Jericho calls for “Harold” to raise the cage, but we see the Fink arguing with Lilian Garcia in the back. Shamrock bends the cage bars open and pulls Jericho out, meaning the beating is on. Referees break it up and Jericho bails as there is no match.

During the break, Jericho fired Finkel and left without him.

Here is Jeff Jarrett, with Debra and Miss Kitty, for a chat. Jarrett says he is embarrassed to be in the ring with Chyna at Unforgiven, because women belong in the kitchen. He sees Fabulous Moolah in the front row so let’s have her get in the ring. Jarrett talks about how Moolah knew her place in her career and wouldn’t fight the men, but Moolah says it’s because they were scared of her. That’s good for a guitar shot to the head so Mae Young runs in as well, earning herself a Figure Four.

We get the debut of Val Venis’ latest video, where he talks about how unlike Steve Blackman, he doesn’t use instruments of pain. The woman next to him looks rather confused for most of this.

Tag Team Titles: Mankind/The Rock vs. Big Show/Undertaker

Rock and Mankind are defending in a Buried Alive match. Mankind goes after both of them at once before Rock shows up, as Mankind isn’t all that bright. Here’s the Rock to go after Undertaker, who gets sent face first into the steps. Back in (with Cole’s second “here comes the cavalry” in about a minute) and a double clothesline drops Show, but Undertaker breaks up the People’s Elbow.

That leaves Show to chokeslam Mankind and carry him to the grave as Rock hits Undertaker with a chair. Mankind is almost in the grave when Rock comes up with a low blow to put Show in instead. Undertaker makes the save but gets punched down the mound of dirt. With Rock and Undertaker fighting off, Show LAUNCHES Mankind off the stage and onto the mound, sending him bouncing into the grave (I’ve seen that for years now and it’s still an amazing sight).

Since that’s a huge spot, Mankind comes up with Mr. Socko to knock Show out and put him in the grave instead. Mankind starts pouring in the dirt and we cut to Rock and Undertaker fighting in the back. Cue HHH to jump Rock so Undertaker leaves them to it. Kane comes in to beat up HHH and then shrugs off Chyna’s chair to the back.

Undertaker is back in the arena and there’s a shovel to Mankind’s back to put him in the grave….but he pops right back out. Show smothers him down on the ground and goes to bury him until Rock makes a save this time. Then it’s HHH out with a sledgehammer to….Show, allowing him to bury Mankind. After several shovels full, the referee calls it and Show/Undertaker win the titles.

Rating: B-. This was such a weird match as it felt like a game show more than a fight. The Mankind toss was awesome (he was AIRBORNE) but other than that it was a bunch of saves from putting someone in a grave and covering them with dirt. There is only so much you can get out of that because it is such an insane (and messy) match, but it kept my interest.

Post match HHH buries Mankind even more as an ambulance arrives…..and Steve Austin is in the back. The big beatdown is on and Austin throws HHH in the back of the ambulance. Austin drives it outside and jumps into the cab of a semi truck to ram the ambulance (So that’s where Hogan got the idea for Rock in 2002.) a few times to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. These shows are all over the place with such a big collection of insanity that it can be difficult to remember what happens. That being said, this show had me wanting to see what was next and the insanity was limited. They still need to announce something for Unforgiven already, but you can probably figure out where a lot of this is going. Just come up with a main story already instead of everyone going after HHH, who is going after a bunch of people as well. For now though, nice Smackdown, with Austin being back being a big pickup.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – September 6, 1999: I Remember That One!

Monday Night Raw
Date: September 6, 1999
Location: Hartford Civic Center, Hartford, Connecticut
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We are less than three weeks away from Unforgiven and HHH is still trying to avoid facing various people at the show. This includes the Rock and Mankind, who managed to beat HHH and Shane McMahon to retain the Tag Team Titles last week on Smackdown. Other than that, Chris Jericho has turned Howard Finkel into a nut, with Ken Shamrock not being happy. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Tag Team Titles: The Rock/Mankind vs. Kane/X-Pac

Rock and Mankind are defending but before we get going (and before anyone else can get here), Rock needs to mock Kane for being all excited over being able to speak. We even get an impression of Kane using his voice box, plus a suggestion for where Kane can put it (for easy storage). Mankind comes out, sends out some get well wishes to someone named Brian (that would likely be Brian Hildebrand, who was diagnosed with cancer around this time) and says it’s great to be back in Harvard (he’s trying).

Hold on again though as there’s no X-Pac due to Kane interfering in X-Pac’s match on Smackdown, so Kane is going to do it alone. Hold it yet again though as here is HHH…and he’s going to be Kane’s partner. Cue Chyna with a sledgehammer as Kane hammers on Rock to start.

Rock manages to come back with a Russian legsweep for two and it’s off to Mankind. Kane hammers away in the corner (and says “yeah” to Mankind about something) before clotheslining him in the corner. HHH’s tag request is ignored though, allowing Mankind to grab a Texas piledriver. Kane is fine enough to kick Rock in the face before HHH tags himself in. Then Kane tags himself right back in, only to have HHH hit Kane in the back with the sledgehammer. The Rock Bottom into the People’s Elbow retains the titles.

Rating: C-. Well that was….we’ll go with busy, as they packed in a storyline with the X-Pac absence, Chyna coming out, the sledgehammer, HHH wanting to be Kane’s partner for whatever reason, and a match into the first twelve or so minutes of the show. That’s a lot even for a 1999 Raw, and somehow Kane takes a pin out of the whole ordeal. Granted it was out of a sledgehammer shot and the Rock’s double finishers, but it still feels weird to see Kane getting pinned in about three and a half minutes.

JR: “What kind of human being would hit another man from behind with a sledgehammer?” King: “Uh, HHH?”

Post match Kane sits up but HHH sledgehammers him in the chest a few times. Cue Undertaker and Big Show and HHH leaves as allegiances are questioned. Kane even walks off on his own, making sledgehammer shots all the more worthless by the step.

Jacqueline isn’t worried about Jeff Jarrett wanting to use her as an example tonight. She’ll slap all three dumb blondes tonight (Debra and Miss Kitty being the others).

Jeff Jarrett vs. Jacqueline

Non-title and Miss Kitty (but not Debra) is here with Jarrett. Before the match, Jarrett tells Chyna to watch from the back, because he’s going to show what happens when a woman is in his world. Jacqueline jumps on his back to start with the choking but is quickly flipped and stomped down. The fans want Debra but have to settle for Jarrett sending Jacqueline into the corner for more stomping. A clothesline makes it worse and the Figure Four finishes Jacqueline fast.

Post match Jarrett hits Jacqueline with the guitar. Commentary is AGHAST.

Val Venis isn’t happy with Steve Blackman jumping him from behind last week and threatens revenge.

Edge and Christian vs. Acolytes

For the #1 contendership. The Acolytes start the brawl before the bell and we settle down to Faarooq beating on Christian in the corner. Faarooq misses a headbutt though and it’s quickly off to Bradshaw to beat up Christian. Edge manages a takedown and hands it off to Christian to pick up the pace. Everything breaks down and Bradshaw powerbombs the heck out of Christian. There’s no referee so Bradshaw loads up another, allowing Edge to come in off the top with a missile dropkick to give Christian the pin.

Rating: C. They didn’t have much time here but Edge and Christian continue their rise up the ladder. You can see the talent there and they’re getting more polished every time they’re around. Throw in the Dudleys debuting last week on Smackdown and the new generation of the tag division is starting to come together.

In the back, Edge and Christian are ready for the Rock and Mankind when the Acolytes come in. Cue the Dudley Boyz to jump the Acolytes from behind though and beat them down.

We get GTV where Val Venis and Big Show are in the restroom and Venis wonders why Show is called “big”. Venis is quickly laid out.

Meat is sick of being called Meat and says his real name is Shawn Stasiak. Tonight he is here to carry on the legacy of his father but here is the Mean Street Posse to say his dad sucked. The Posse beats him down (that’s a weird thing to see).

Here is Val Venis to call out Big Show. We see Undertaker telling Big Show to go deal with this so here is Show for the brawl. Venis unloads in the corner and fires off a bunch of right hands but gets shoved away. We have a referee in the ring but there’s no bell as this is just a fight. Show fights back but Venis kicks the leg out, only to get pulled out of the air. The chokeslam is good for the pin as I guess this was a match, minus the start that is.

Post match Steve Blackman runs in to beat on Venis with a kendo stick.

The Dudley Boyz are not worried about attacking the Acolytes. D-Von lists off the commandments but here are the Acolytes to jump them right back.

Lilian Garcia is ready to introduce the next match but here is the Fink to interrupt. Cue Ken Shamrock to chase after the Fink but Chris Jericho (and the crowd ROARS) pops up on screen to say this is a lot more real than the Ultimate Fighting Championships. They can go face to face on Smackdown, which works for Shamrock.

Here are HHH and Chyna for a chat. HHH talks about how great he is and how many things he has done. He put Mankind out of action for three months and beat him for the WWF Title. Then he took the Rock to school, so Linda McMahon needs to stay out of their business. Cue Billy Gunn to interrupt, saying HHH recruited him into DX to avoid the beating Gunn could give him. Gunn calls him an a****** and his music starts playing but cuts off as they’re not done yet. After the main event is set, the music plays again.

Mean Street Posse vs. Test/Pat Patterson/Gerald Brisco

Terri Runnels is here with the Posse and joins commentary. Patterson and Brisco get beaten down before Test comes out but here he comes to wreck the Posse in short order. Powerbombs abound and here is Shawn Stasiak to cut off Rodney from leaving. Another powerbomb and one heck of a top rope elbow finishes for Test. That elbow was nuts as Rodney was over halfway across the ring.

Hollys vs. New Brood

Gangrel is here with the Hardys and Crash has a scale. Hold on though as the Hardys have to be weighed before the match. Hardcore doesn’t think they weigh enough but Jeff dropkicks him down to start fast. We settle down to Matt slamming Crash and dropping the middle rope legdrop for two.

Jeff comes in with a springboard moonsault for two and a double legdrop gives Matt the same. The chinlock goes on for a bit until Crash manages to headscissors Jeff into the corner. Hardcore comes in and gets taken down by the Hardys, with Crash coming in for the save. Everything breaks down and Hardcore hits the Falcon Arrow on Jeff for the pin.

Rating: C. For some reason this match got almost as much time as anything else on the show so far. The Hollys have a little something with their tough guy/goofy guy combination and it is working so far. At the same time the New Brood has me wondering what the point of Gangrel is, as the Hardys seem like they could be just fine on their own.

Post match the Hollys stay on them but the lights go out, meaning Crash gets a blood bath. Hardcore: “Do you know how funny you look right now?” And they fight again.

Undertaker and Big Show challenge Rock and Mankind to a Buried Alive match for the Tag Team Titles on Smackdown.

Here is Al Snow, albeit in his Avatar gear (a masked martial arts guy). Snow: “SHAZAM!” Snow puts the mask on and says he’s here to protect the WWF from evil. Then he wakes up and says he’s in the genie pants. Snow: “The last time I wore this, you could have stuck a magnet up my a** and dragged me through Fort Knox and I still wouldn’t have drawn money.” He drops to his knees and starts barking before running over to the commentary table to write something on a legal pad. Then he runs off, still barking.

Rock promises to take Big Show’s 59lb head and stick it up Undertaker, who has a bunch of Mickey Mouse tattoos. Mankind gets serious and is ready to fight too. I remember this promo from when it aired live and finding it hilarious. Maybe not so much these days.

Another GTV shows Marianna on the phone, begging someone to talk to Chaz.

D’Lo Brown vs. Steve Blackman

European Champion Mark Henry, with a pair of ladies, joins commentary, much to Lawler’s delight. Blackman starts kicking away but gets dropped for the quick legdrop. Some choking on the ropes has Brown in more trouble and we hit the chinlock. Brock fights up and grabs the Sky High but stops to yell at Henry. Cue Val Venis to deck Blackman, allowing Brown to hit the Low Down for the pin.

Rating: C-. Managing to get in a pair of feuds into a three minute match is rather impressive, albeit a bit excessive to put it mildly. Brown vs. Henry is fine enough for a midcard match, though Venis vs. Blackman isn’t quite as interesting. It just wasn’t much of a match here, but Brown is one of the smoother workers around at this point.

Post match Henry wrecks Brown.

Ivory is ready to hurt Tori in the first ever women’s hardcore match. Tori, in a shirt and not much else, jumps her and has to be carried off.

Women’s Title: Ivory vs. Tori

Ivory is defending under hardcore rules and this is joined in the bathroom with Tori throwing soap. They go into the shower, where Jacqueline has to grab a towel and run off. Ivory pours shampoo in Tori’s eyes and washes her mouth out with soap. Then they fight into a men’s locker room with Tori sending her over a table. Ivory smashes a mirror over Tori’s head to retain. Lilian Garcia: “The Women’s Wrestling Federation Champion is Ivory!”

Rating: D. This was an excuse to have Tori brawling in very limited clothing with gratuitous camera shots. I get the appeal, but this kind of thing gets old in a hurry, as it’s just there for the most obvious reasons. Granted it doesn’t help that women’s wrestling means absolutely nothing and having this didn’t help things, but can they at least be less obvious with it?

Post match Ivory rips open the back of Tori’s shirt and burns her with an iron.

Chyna is told she’s barred from ringside for the main event, but she’s just going to forget that Earl Hebner told her that.

WWF Title: HHH vs. Billy Gunn

HHH, with Chyna, is defending….or at least in theory, as Chyna is ejected. Gunn comes to the ring and stares at Chyna on the way out. HHH tries to jump him in the aisle and they start fast, with Gunn stomping away at ringside. Gunn takes him inside for the opening bell but HHH scores with the Fameasser. The jumping knee puts Gunn down again and it’s a posting to keep him in trouble.

Back in and HHH cranks on the arm with a variety of armbars. Gunn fights up with the good arm and slugs away, setting up a Jackhammer for two. Cue Shane McMahon as Gunn clotheslines HHH to the floor. The referees get rid of Shane as HHH brings in the title, only to have Gunn take it away and get in his own shot for two.

HHH bumps the referee and the Fameasser (basically an ax kick in this case) connects for no count. Gunn hits him low and gets two after about thirty seconds of laying around. HHH goes up top but dives into a raised boot. Gunn’s Stinger Splash hits…well the general vicinity of the post, setting up the Pedigree to retain the title.

Rating: B-. Pretty much the match of the night by far here, partially due to it getting some time and possibly due to letting them actually wrestle for a bit. Gunn was a crazy athlete but there is only so much that you can get with that name and theme song. For a one off main event here though, he did rather well as the challenger.

Post match Chyna and Shane come back out but here is Kane to chokeslam all three villains to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. There were some nice parts to this one but I’m still not sure what the main story is supposed to be. HHH doesn’t have a top challenger at the moment and the focus seems to be on whatever Rock and Mankind are doing at the moment. I’m sure things will start to come together more before the pay per view, but these shows can be more than a bit exhausting as there are so many things going on that it is hard to figure out what is going on. Just slow down a bit and let us know what we’re supposed to care about.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – August 30, 1999: The Saving Grace?

Monday Night Raw
Date: August 30, 1999
Location: FleetCenter, Boston, Massachusetts
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

As usual, it’s been a minute since we’ve been here and things have been changing a bit. HHH is the new WWF Champion, having defeated Mankind last week. He also successfully defended the title against the Rock last week on the debut of a new show called Smackdown. We’re on the way to Unforgiven and the card needs to get started so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here is the Rock to get things going and yep the people seem to like him. After declaring that he is FINALLY in Boston again, Rock blames a wannabe cowboy commissioner named Shawn Michaels for costing him the WWF Title on Smackdown. Rock is going to take Shawn’s little cowboy hat, spin his six shooter around, and stick it, uh, somewhere. He calls out HHH for a fight but doesn’t get him, which sends Rock to the back to find HHH himself. We cut to the Rock in the back, where HHH, Chyna and Shane McMahon all jump him in a hallway. Mankind makes the save.

Here are Shane McMahon and the Mean Street Posse for a chat. Shane has heard that Rock and Mankind want a WWF Title shot tonight so they can have it….if they can defeat their respective opponents. We’ll start with the Rock, who gets to face the Undertaker in a no holds barred, falls count anywhere match. As for Mankind, Shane beat him last week but first, Mankind attacked the Mean Street Posse. That’s why tonight, Mankind has to beat all of them RIGHT NOW!

Mankind vs. Mean Street Posse

If Mankind wins, he gets a WWF Title shot against HHH tonight. Oh and Shane McMahon will be the guest referee! As expected, it’s a triple teaming to start but Mankind fights back like he’s Mankind and they’re the Mean Street Posse. The beating is on with Mankind hitting the running knee in the corner on Rodney but Joey Abs gets in a chair shot (behind Shane’s back of course) for a breaker.

Back in and Joey (with his foot in a cast) stomps away as Pete throws in a trashcan. Shane misses the beating but does stop to yell at them, allowing a double suplex to get two on Mankind. Joey’s street sign hits Rodney by mistake but Shane has hurt his ankle. A shovel to the head drops Joey but Shane won’t count. That earns Shane the Mandible Claw, which draws in HHH for the brawl. The match is thrown out with Mankind being declared the winner by DQ, but Shane makes the correction (as Lilian Garcia seemed to mess up).

Rating: C-. There was only so much you could get out of this was it wasn’t going to be anything more than a joke. That’s what the Posse was there for, but they didn’t bother trying to do anything more than goofy nonsense. They had to have a way to keep Mankind from getting the title shot and these shenanigans are as good as they could have done, all things considered.

Undertaker, with Big Show and Paul Bearer, isn’t worried about facing the Rock tonight. He’s ready to shove a soup bone down Rock’s throat, as Undertaker isn’t exactly speaking like his normal self here.

Undertaker vs. The Rock

No Holds Barred and Falls Count Anywhere, which is different than hardcore because there’s probably going to be a hardcore match later. Undertaker has Big Show and Paul Bearer with him and Rock gets a WWF Title match later tonight if he wins. Actually never mind, as Undertaker doesn’t think Rock has earned the right to do this so Big Show is doing it instead.

Big Show vs. The Rock

Same everything as before as that’s a lot to type again. Undertaker is on commentary (that’s a WEIRD one) and Rock is in street clothes as he punches away at Show to start. A clothesline puts Show on the floor but he sends Rock into the barricade to slow him down. Rock is fine enough to hit a Russian legsweep on the ramp but Show knocks him down again without too much trouble.

Back in and Show misses a charge into the corner so they head right back to the floor. Rock slips out of a ram into the post though and puts on a headset, offering to slap the dead off Undertaker’s head. A right hand drops Undertaker but the distraction lets Show chokeslam Rock through the announcers’ table for the pin. Lilian: “Your winner, the Undertaker!”

Rating: C. This didn’t have time to go anywhere, but at least they got in a hardcore match in about three and a half minutes. Throw in the fact that they managed to have two of the three biggest heroes in the company lose in the first 40 or so minutes of the show and that’s not too bad. That’s a rather Russo style show for you and I have a feeling it’s going to get even worse.

Post match HHH comes out to go after Rock but Undertaker grabs him by the throat. Cue Mankind to go after Show and Undertaker, allowing HHH to escape.

Al Snow is rather upset about Big Boss Man stealing his dog Pepper. As he pleas for people to help him, we can hear sounds of some rather adult actions taking place off screen.

Here is Big Boss Man for a chat. He asks for and gets Al Snow out here, with Boss Man saying Snow lived up to his end of the bargain on SmackDown. Then Snow was crying on Heat and Boss Man got the feeling. Snow keeps asking where Pepper is and Boss Man tells him to come to his hotel this week on Smackdown and he’ll get Pepper back. They even shake on it.

We look back at Chris Jericho putting Road Dogg through a table on Smackdown and injuring his back, putting Dogg on the shelf for a long time.

X-Pac vs. Taka Michinoku

Funaki is here with Taka. X-Pac hammers away to start but Funaki gets in a cheap shot. Taka knocks him outside and gets in a few shots, only to miss a moonsault back inside. A sitout powerbomb sets up the Bronco Buster and the X Factor for the fast pin on Taka.

Rating: C. X-Pac is in a weird place here as he’s too big to be fighting these smaller guys but not big enough to be in the main event scene. What matters is the fans are behind him though and he is more than good enough in the ring to back it up. They just have to find the right way to use him though and this was just a way to keep him warm.

Post match X-Pac takes out an invading Funaki as well. X-Pac says he wants the big guys.

Edge and Christian vs. The Acolytes vs. The Hollys vs. The Hardys

Elimination rules and the winners get a Tag Team Title match. It’s a brawl to start but Viscera, Mideon, Prince Albert, Droz, Stevie Richards and the Blue Meanie come in for the no contest. In a four way elimination match. In about a minute. The referees breaking it up takes longer than the match.

Here is the Rock to say Undertaker and Big Show didn’t impress anyone so he wants a handicap match tonight. First though, he wants to stick Undertaker’s head inside Big Show. Mickey Mouse tattoos are mentioned as well. Cue Mankind to say he didn’t like the Rock at some point, but now the people want and need him to be the Rock’s partner for a shot at the Tag Team Titles. Mankind even loads up Rock’s catchphrase but Rock cuts him off and says sure. Just DON’T YOU EVER steal his catchphrases again, but Mankind even rips off the IF YOU SMELL, which has Rock annoyed.

Here is Meat, with Terri Runnels, for a chat, but Terri hits on the Rock on the way up the ramp. He isn’t impressed. Hold on though as we get a GTV segment of Meat and Marianna, shall we say enjoying each other behind the interview set earlier. Terri goes after Meat but here are Marianna and Chaz (her boyfriend) for the big brawl.

Miss Kitty helps with Debra’s hair because the hair stylist has no idea what she is doing.

Jeff Jarrett/Mark Henry vs. D’Lo Brown/Billy Gunn

Debra and Miss Kitty are here with Jarrett and here is Chyna to do commentary. Brown clotheslines Jarrett down to start and something like a Sky High gets two. Jeff gets in a shot of his own and it’s Henry coming in for a gorilla press drop. Choking on the rope ensues as Kitty works on Debra’s hair. A clothesline puts Brown down as Chyna promises to get revenge and Jeff Jarrett’s Intercontinental Title. Brown gets in a shot of his own and everything breaks down. The distraction lets Chyna come in with the guitar….which hits Gunn by mistake, giving Jarrett the pin.

Rating: C. It wasn’t even four minutes long but it was nice to have a pretty run of the mill tag match until the screwy ending. There is nothing wrong with putting two potential title matches together, but Chyna seems more likely to get the Intercontinental Title shot (signing a contract helps). That’s more interesting than Gunn, which is the case with just about anything.

Test names Pat Patterson and Gerald Brisco the best men for his wedding to Stephanie McMahon. Whichever has the better memory gets to hold the ring.

Gangrel vs. Ken Shamrock

Gangrel has the Hardys with him, with commentary getting on Lilian Garcia for not calling them the New Brood. The bell rings and you can hear what sounds like a fire extinguisher putting out the Brood’s ring of fire entrance. Shamrock goes for the leg to start and Gangrel heads straight to the floor. Gangrel slugs away outside but the Hardys’ distraction is enough to get them ejected. Back in and Shamrock can’t quite get the ankle lock so Gangrel elbows him in the face. Shamrock kicks away and elbows him in the face, setting up the ankle lock for the tap.

Rating: C. It’s almost weird to see a match from this era getting about five minutes and of all their options, it’s Gangrel vs. Ken Shamrock? Gangrel wasn’t the biggest threat to Shamrock but it was nice to have him doing something other than drinking red liquid. Shamrock was in a weird place at this point and needs something to do, as just beating up Gangrel isn’t the most interesting.

Post match avowed Jericholic Howard Finkel introduces Chris Jericho, who says he isn’t coming out here to fight Shamrock. Instead, Shamrock can show up at Smackdown and clean his boots. Shamrock gives a slow motion chase.

Mankind wants to do the People’s Elbow but Rock tells him to stick with the sock gimmick. Mankind: “Mr. Socko.”

Here is Women’s Champion Ivory for a chat. After yelling at Michael Cole for undressing her with his eyes, she declares that she is not a sl**. Tori on the other hand is, so here is Tori to jump Ivory (and hitting Cole in the process), with Luna Vachon and Jacqueline coming in to join the brawl.

We look at Big Show chokeslamming Rock through the announcers’ table earlier.

Tag Team Titles: Big Show/Undertaker vs. Mankind/The Rock

Show and Undertaker are defending and Show hammers Mankind down to start as Undertaker doesn’t look overly interested. Undertaker gets in some shots to Mankind on the floor, with Rock having to make a save back inside. The bearhug goes on (showing how big Show really is) until Mankind punches his way to freedom. With that not working, Show punches him outside for another beating from Undertaker.

Mankind gets dropped on what is left of the broken announcers’ table as Paul Bearer comes out. Bearer says something to Undertaker, who walks out as Mankind gets in a shot of his own. The hot tag brings in Rock to clean house, only to have Show plant him with a chokeslam. Mankind’s chair is knocked into his face before Show’s delayed cover gets two on Rock. The referee gets bumped though and Rock BLASTS Show in the head with the chair. A double People’s Elbow gives Rock the pin and the titles.

Rating: C. This was another rare match that got some time and it helps a little bit, but there were so many things going on through the match that you can only get so much out of it. Between the chair shot, the ref bump and the Bearer/Undertaker stuff, it was hard to get into things. Throw in the fact that the Tag Team Titles mean nothing and this is little more than a big pop at the end without much else going on to get there. Kind of like most of the Attitude Era when you think about it.

Overall Rating: C+. It was another show with all kinds of stuff going on at the same time, but the addition of Smackdown can help things out a bit. If nothing else, it is nice to see some of the rapid fire stories siphoned off to Smackdown instead of doing everything on Raw for a change. It was a show with a bit more coherent string of stories throughout and we should be in for some good things on the way towards Unforgiven. Nice stuff here, with Smackdown possibly being the saving grace.

 

 

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – December 10, 2007 (15th Anniversary Special, 2022 Redo): I Love It

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 10, 2007
Location: Arena At Harbor Yard, Bridgeport, Connecticut
Attendance: 7,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s time for a special show this week as it is the fifteenth anniversary celebration of the show. That means not only do we have a bunch of guest stars, but it is an extra large three hour edition. Throw in that it is also the go home show for Armageddon and this is going to be a busy night. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a mash up of Raw intros over the years, though oddly enough they aren’t in chronological order.

Here are the McMahons (minus Linda of course) for a chat. Vince is ready for the McMahon Family Portrait but first, he needs to brag about how great Raw has been over the years. Tonight it is time for a family reunion, though minus Linda McMahon who has some stomach issue. Instead, he has Shane and Stephanie out here and wants the photographer but gets Hornswoggle. That means Hornswoggle grabs the leg, so Shane has to pull him off. Vince says he loves Shane, Stephanie, and the fans.

It’s time for the picture, but here is HHH to interrupt. Vince: “What are you doing here?” HHH: “I’m waiting on that pop to die down.” HHH says he’s here for the family portrait because everyone knows what is going on here. It’s like he could be Vince’s son! HHH: “Sup Steph?” Anyway, HHH wants to bring out some of the Divas, past and present, that Vince has loved before. This includes Melina, Sunny and….Mae Young! Vince: “It was at Moolah’s funeral I had a lot to drink. Steph…..and I was thinking of your mom!”

HHH calls out any WWE employee who has been mistaken for a woman and that Vince has attempted to love, drawing out the Fink, Big Dick Johnson, Bastion Booger, Pat Patterson, Gerald Brisco and Abe “Knuckleball” Schwartz. HHH: “I guess the Brooklyn Brawler was busy tonight.” Stephanie says she’s embarrassed by Vince so it’s time that she embarrassed him. She kisses HHH for the first time in a good many years and leaves. HHH: “I’ll see you at home. Uh, I mean your brother’s a gnome!”

Vince to HHH: “I HATE YOU!” HHH tells Vince to just go away but realizes that Hornswoggle is sad. All he wanted was to be happy, so HHH brings out the Godfather, complete with women. JR: “Even Patterson is happy!” Hornswoggle’s mind is blown and dancing ensues to wrap up a hilarious segment, with HHH getting to do the humor that suits him best.

Intercontinental Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Carlito

Hardy is defending in a ladder match. Carlito kicks him down and sets up the ladder way too early, only to have to stop for a clothesline. Hardy gets in a shot of his own but a slingshot dive only hits ladder. A dropkick knocks Carlito off the apron and into a ladder bridged against the barricade so Hardy goes up. That means Carlito has to springboard in to land on the ladder (Shelton Benjamin style), setting up a sunset bomb to leave them both laying.

We take a break and come back with Jeff missing a legdrop over the ladder to send him crashing down. Carlito crushes the leg in the ladder and then drops a ladder onto it to make Hardy scream even more. Hardy can barely move so Carlito….puts the ladder in the corner instead of climbing, earning himself a backdrop onto said ladder. The Swanton connects but a Backstabber sends Hardy into the ladder. Carlito goes up but this time Hardy shoves him down and retains the title.

Rating: C+. They weren’t going for anything groundbreaking here but Jeff can do this match in his sleep (and probably came close to it at various points). Carlito was just a challenger of the week as Jeff is on his way up, as he isn’t going to be losing less than a week before his pay per view showdown with HHH. They had some big spots here, but it’s just a quick ladder match with as much drama as that can bring.

Shawn Michaels can’t believe it has been fifteen years of Monday Night Raw. He was on the first show and defended the Intercontinental Title against….someone (Max Moon). While Shawn can’t remember fifteen years ago, he can remember Mr. Kennedy bringing in an impostor Marty Jannetty. That’s why he brought in the real one this week to face Kennedy, because he faces MR. HBK……HBK…..this weekend.

We take a look at some classic OMG Raw moments. I know these things are done over and over but there really have been some great ones on this show over the years.

Here are Santino Marella and Maria, with the former being tired of all this….and here’s a surprise.

Santino Marella vs. Rob Van Dam

Kick to the head and the Five Star finish in less than forty five seconds. Very nice cameo as Van Dam is always going to pop the crowd.

Long video on Evolution, which really was a special stable in a lot of ways.

Here are all four members of Evolution (or “original” members according to the introduction, even though there were only ever four of them) for a reunion. Randy Orton comes out last but says he’s going to stay on the stage instead of having the rest of the teams ride his coattails. Orton remembers what happened when HHH turned on him the last time he was champion. HHH: “Yeah that was pretty cool.”

They beat him up because hes was annoying, but Orton would rather be remembered as part of Rated-RKO with Edge, who comes out as well. Edge says he’ll take the World Title from Batista on Sunday, but Ric Flair says find a partner and let’s fight. Orton has already done that so we’re ready to go.

Evolution vs. Umaga/Rated-RKO

Joined in progress with Batista handing it off to Flair to lock up with Edge. As Lawler clarifies that the “Flair retires if he loses” only applies to singles matches, Umaga takes Flair down and grabs a nerve hold. Orton comes in to stomp away and the knee drop gets two. A backdrop gets Flair out of trouble and it’s Batista coming in to clean house. Everything breaks down and Umaga cleans house….but also shoves the referee for the DQ.

Rating: C. This was all about the reunion and I get why they didn’t have one of the #1 contenders lose. That being said, Umaga has lost to HHH on his own how many times now but can’t take a fall to most of Evolution? As has been the case with everything on this show, this is about the moment instead of the match and that’s not a bad thing.

Post match Orton and Edge leave Umaga on his own, meaning it’s big beatdown. Couldn’t they have just done that for the finish to the match?

More classic Raw moments, this time involving vehicles.

Hornswoggle annoys Mickie James and Molly Holly until William Regal breaks that up. Regal talks about Vince McMahon’s tough love, which tonight will be shown in a match against the Great Khali. Oh and as luck would have it: Finlay’s plane ticket from Ireland was canceled so Hornswoggle is on his own.

Hornswoggle vs. Great Khali

The bell rings….and it’s Hulk Hogan (in black) for the save. We get the big staredown and Hogan hammers away, eventually knocking Khali down. That’s enough for Khali to bail as we get a tease for one more Hogan match. Hogan thanks the fans, talks about American Gladiators, does a Randy Savage OH YEAH (ok then), and poses with Hornswoggle for the funny moment.

Here are some classic D-Generation X moments.

Another classic moment: the debut of Mr. Socko, which has to be up there on the “how did they get this stupid thing over”, with the answer being “because Mick Foley is really awesome”. Vince throwing him out and sealing his own fate because he has no protection from Steve Austin a few minutes later makes it all the better.

Legends Battle Royal

Al Snow, Bart Gunn, Doink The Clown, Repo Man, Steve Blackman, Pete Gas, Bob Backlund, Gangrel, The Goon, Skinner, Flash Funk, IRS, Scotty 2 Hotty, Sgt. Slaughter, Jim Neidhart, Gillberg

For some reason there are sixteen people in a fifteen man battle royal but oh well. Gillberg gets the big entrance, but the impressive one here is Blackman, who looks better than he did in his career. Everyone gets together and tosses Gillberg before Backlund is knocked out as well. Snow knocks Doink out with Head and then does the same thing to Gangrel. Head Cheese explodes for a bit but Funk kicks Snow out.

A bunch of people go out in a hurry and suddenly we’re down to IRS, Slaughter, Scotty and Skinner. IRS grabs his briefcase but Scotty knocks it into his face, setting up the Worm. Skinner dumps Scotty but gets caught in the Cobra Clutch. That’s broken up as Slaughter tosses Skinner, only to get dumped by IRS for the win.

Rating: C. This was more or less the poor man’s version of the Gimmick Battle Royal and that is not a bad thing. Again, this was all about the wrestlers having one more moment and the winner wasn’t important in the slightest. Just let the fans have some fun with the “oh I remember him” moments.

Hold on though because here is Ted DiBiase….who pays off IRS to eliminate himself and give DiBiase the win. That’s always great.

People have been slapped over the years.

Here is Eric Bischoff to talk about how things keep changing but always stay the same. At the end of the day, he is here to take your money and people like the McMahons need him to reinvent the business. So now give him a round of applause! Or have Chris Jericho interrupt, and Bischoff knows this isn’t good.

Bischoff: “Didn’t I fire you in this ring a couple of years ago?” Jericho remembers being fired but he thanks Bischoff for reigniting a fire in him. That’s why he’ll be the new WWE Champion on Sunday, which has Bischoff laughing. Jericho laughs at Bischoff for being fat and going bald but Bischoff suggests Jericho just forfeit the match to Orton right now. After some rhyming, Jericho knocks him down and takes out Randy Orton for trying to interfere. This felt like the “oh yeah we should do something about that match” segment.

Tag Team Titles: Cody Rhodes/Hardcore Holly vs. Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch

Rhodes and Holly are challenging and Dusty Rhodes is on commentary in case you needed a hint about the result. Dusty is very excited (believe it or not) as Cody starts with Murdoch, who slams him down for an elbow drop. Cade misses an elbow of his own though and the hot tag brings in Holly to clean house. The dropkick hits Murdoch and Cade hits him by mistake to make it worse. The Alabama Slam gives Holly the pin and the titles. Nothing wrong with a title change to make a show like this feel special, especially with Dusty there too.

Celebrities have been on Raw over the years.

Video on the Divas over the years, which has been up and down to put it mildly.

Here is Jillian Hall, who has a Christmas album out. She starts singing the 12 Days Of Christmas but Trish Stratus interrupts. Trish doesn’t like Jillian’s singing but Jillian doesn’t like Trish’s ego. Cue Lita for the staredown with Trish but they team up in hatred of music. Those two deserve a quick moment on this kind of a show and this was good.

Also on Raw over the years: comedy hijinks! Oftentimes minus the comedy, but Edge and Christian on the kazoos continue to reek of awesomeness. Thankfully Mick Foley getting the Rock with an IT DOESN’T MATTER WHAT YOU THINK and taking a lap around the ring is still one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen.

And now, weddings! They are quite the tradition and they still work, at least most of the time.

Lita watches the wedding video when Kane comes up to her. Awkwardness ensues, with Kane asking if she’s seen any good movies lately and Lita asking about the weather. Ron Simmons gets his cameo.

Armageddon rundown.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Marty Jannetty

Marty goes after the arm to start but Kennedy kicks the knee out and grabs a half crab. Back up and an enziguri gets Marty out of trouble, allowing him to hammer away for two. The right hands in the corner are countered with Kennedy’s atomic drop but Marty is back with the Rocker Dropper. Kennedy breaks up the top rope fist drop though and the Mic Drop gives him the pin.

Rating: C-. Just a quick match here that ties into something that happened last week. Marty wasn’t bad, but what are you supposed to get out of a four minute match that didn’t have a ton of drama? Not an awful match or anything close to it, but Marty felt like a relic from the past instead of a threat.

Post match Kennedy stays on Marty but Shawn Michaels runs in Kennedy gets on him too, drawing out HHH for the save and (another) DX reunion.

Here is Vince McMahon to name the Greatest Superstar In Raw History. There are maybe three realistic options for that pick, but Vince announces……HIMSELF as the winner. Cue Mankind for the Mandible Claw to leave Vince laying for a nice reaction. Then the lights go out and a gong strikes, meaning it’s the Undertaker (coming to the ring…..slowly…..methodically…..at his own pace) for a chokeslam. As you might imagine, with Vince down and mostly done, the glass shatters and here’s Steve Austin, who still seems rather popular.

Austin thinks fifteen years of Raw is impressive and deserves a toast so he’ll drink to that. Vince needs to get up, but Austin lays down next to him for the toast, only to realize that this isn’t going to work. Austin gets him up and Vince tries to drink, only to get cut off by the Stunner.

With Vince done, Austin says the card Vince had didn’t matter, because the greatest star in the history of Raw is the fans. It doesn’t matter if you’re at home watching on TV or in this arena in the cheap seats or front row, you’re the reason this show has worked for so long. Austin calls out the locker room for a beer bash (William Regal and CM Punk seem to have something else in hand) and one more punch to Vince wraps us up, as only it could.

Overall Rating: A. This is a great example of a show that was not about the wrestling whatsoever and that is not a bad thing. This show was all about nostalgia, with Armageddon being something that was kind of in the background. I had a blast with the nostalgia between the clips and the appearances, and the big ending at the end was great. WWE knows how to do reunion shows well and this is one of the better ones they’ve ever done.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – January 4, 1999: He Did It

Monday Night Raw
Date: January 4, 1999
Location: DCU Center, Worcester, Massachusetts
Attendance: 10,668
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

This is the Raw from the same night as the Fingerpoke of Doom and of course features Mankind winning his first world title. The rest of the show is more or less forgotten and since this is my favorite moment in the history of wrestling I just wanted to do this show. Let’s get to it.

A video about the career of HBK opens the show. He had recently been fired as Commissioner by Vince so this is kind of a goodbye thing. Vince yells to cut the video, so we cut to the arena to see the Corporation coming to the ring. There is a lot of talent in there to put it mildly. Oh and Test is there too. Vince talks about how Shawn humiliated his son and if anyone does that again, they have to deal with Vince.

A live shot of Shawn coming to the arena is shown on the screen, and there’s the music. Not sure what the point of the video was since he was there seconds later. He has the cavalry with him, and it’s DX. And by that, I mean the REAL DX: HHH, X-Pac, Chyna and the Outlaws. This team with Shawn is a weird visual but cool at the same time.

According to Shawn he’s still the Commissioner because the contract is iron clad and Vince said the Commissioner answered to no one, including Vince. Shawn says the only way he leaves is if he resigns, which more or less set up the Vince makes Shawn’s life a living nightmare angle. We see a clip of Vince drawing his number for the Rumble and he wanted #2. Shawn therefore grants his wish, setting up one of the worst Rumbles of all time. He also promises Vince a surprise for later in the night, which will drive him Stone Cold Crazy.

By the way, Cole is somehow more of an annoying douche here than he is now.

Ken Shamrock vs. Steve Blackman

Shamrock is the IC and a tag champion here but this is nontitle. Ken was in the ring for the opening segment but had a regular entrance for no apparent reason. It’s a striking contest to start with Blackman taking over. We hear about Billy Gunn feuding with Shamrock, more or less giving away the ending.

Dan Severn, in a neck brace, comes down. He used to be both UFC Champion and NWA Champion at the same time. It’s so weird hearing about UFC on WWF TV. His mustache on his own could probably win the IC Title. It’s that awesome. Dan and Shamrock were big rivals in UFC so there’s the reason. Shamrock hits his belly to belly which is more of a throw than anything else. Severn pops up on the apron and Billy Gunn runs down for a Fameasser to Shamrock, giving Blackman the pin. Predictable but fine.

Rating: N/A. Not about the match or anything as this was just for the angle. That’s perfectly fine and is a common practice in wrestling today still. Blackman was just boring to put it mildly, but he was trying at least. The Attitude Era was known for having a point to everything, and this had about three angles going at once, which is average for the time.

Gunn and Shamrock are fighting in the back.

Here comes Mankind for no apparent reason. He doesn’t have his far more famous music yet either. Foley beat up Shane last week apparently. Foley: “I swear that was the first time I’ve ever grabbed another man’s testicles.” He’s just awesome at this point with his promos as he’s a clueless putz that seems to find himself in the top feuds in the company but everyone loves him and he can back it up. It was just out there all the time, but it worked like a charm.

He wants a shot at the Rock and the Title at the Rumble. We get an I Love Lucy reference as he says that’s what the fans want. He corrects the fans by saying he’s not God but he’s good. Foley beat Rock at Rock Bottom but Vince changed the decision. Vince comes out and blames Foley for blaming the fans. He says Foley hasn’t paid his dues and no more title shots for him.

Vince makes HHH vs. Foley tonight with the winner getting a spot in the Rumble. We see a clip of Foley beating up Shane, and Shane is announced as the guest referee. I knew that before it was said. There was a hardon for guest refs around this time so it was pretty clear that was coming.

Chyna and her friend Sammy are here.

Mark Henry vs. Goldust

Henry is sexual chocolate here and wants Chyna. How weird is it that these two are still employed? Goldie is still a bit insane here unlike now when there is nothing special about his character in the slightest. Goldust goes to the legs because that’s what you do against every big man you ever fight. Just as always, it doesn’t work.

Henry more or less dominates, hitting a big elbow drop. A press slam drop ends Goldie’s comeback and here are Chyna and Sammy on the stage. This allows Goldust to hit Shattered Dreams, which is of course a DQ.

Rating: D. This was just a waste of time and did nothing but set up the angle that’s about to happen. Goldust didn’t really mean much at all and Henry was in this whole thing with Chyna. You got a lot more pointless matches like these at this time, but it was a far more angle heavy period of time.

Sammy and Chyna get in and Chyna has something to say. The other night with him was incredible, but she’s not enough woman for him. She introduces him to her friend Sammy. Chyna makes the inevitable offer, and Henry faints. I’m not sure if this ends tonight, but the payoff for this is BAD. Apparently it doesn’t but Sammy is a transvestite. Gotta love Russo!

Jesse Ventura is governor of Minnesota. That’s still insane. His line at the inauguration: “We shocked the world.” Amen. Also for you REALLY old school fans, Terry, Tyrell and Jade are here, more commonly known as his wife, son and daughter. Just in case you never got those references.

Dennis Knight (soon to be Mideon) is in a dungeon, chained to the ceiling with various metal objects hanging around and laying on the floor. Sure why not?

Godfather vs. Test

Test is in the Corporation, which would change later. He had just debuted recently before this as a hired gun. Ho Train hits and Test is in trouble. Val Venis comes out as Test hits a big boot. Godfather and Test fight on the floor and the referee just throws it out for no apparent reason. Val runs down and brawls with Test. This whole thing took like 2 minutes.

DX is talking.

Mankind vs. HHH

Winner goes to the Rumble. Shane is guest referee. HHH works on the arm as Cole is REALLY annoying already. This is going to be short. Foley hits a baseball slide to put HHH down. HHH gets a sunset flip but Foley grabs the ropes. Shane kicks his arm and makes a fast count to end it. Like I said it was short, as in like 2 minutes.

HHH apologizes but says business is business and a win is a win. To avoid thoughts of a heel turn he gives Shane a Pedigree before saying to Foley that Shane is all his. Mankind says this is something my high school coach taught me. He more or less puts Shane in an abdominal stretch while sitting down. Foley says he’ll break Shane’s shoulder if Vince and the Stooges, who have just come out (ok not in Patterson’s case but 2/3 isn’t bad), come any closer. He wants a title shot TONIGHT and makes Shane screams. Vince agrees but Foley wants No Disqualifications. It’s on, and Rock comes out to yell at Vince.

Slam of the Week is X-Pac getting kicked in the head by Bossman.

We recap what just happened.

Edge vs. D’Lo Brown

Edge has only been around about 6 months at this point and still comes through the crowd. I LOVED this guy back in the day and did for a long time. Brown and Henry have been having issues with PMS, so expect a run in here. No bell here as we just get going. Big plancha to the floor by Edge which has no effect for some reason.

Liger Bomb to Edge doesn’t get a cover as D’Lo has to play to the crowd. Very nice top rope cross body from Edge gets two. Here’s PMS as has been a theme tonight. Terri is pregnant but won’t say who the father is. D’lo accidentally knocks her to the floor and she holds her stomach. This would result in Brown being their slave more or less. I hated this stable, as did most people. The match just ends.

Rating: C+. This was a fun match as Brown was always solid in the ring and Edge was AWESOME when he debuted. This was a great pairing and I’d love to see them go at it again. And then we have to do a lost baby angle which was one of Russo’s favorites. It turned out that Terri was never pregnant of course.

Kane comes out with Shane, Bearer and the Stooges. He’s in the Corporation as well but doesn’t seem happy about it. Kane has a sign on his back for the Brisco Brothers’ Body Shop. Shane says this is a handicap match against the Stooges. Wait what?

Gerald Brisco/Pat Patterson vs. Kane

Vince comes out again and says this is because the Stooges were partially responsible for Shane getting hurt last week. Patterson tries to bribe Kane with what he has in his pocket: a cigarette and a condom. Would anyone else like to just watch Patterson go about his daily life? Chokeslam for Brisco. Patterson gets a chair but Kane sees him. Shane is in the ring with a mic and egging Kane on which is funny stuff. Kane PUNTS the chair off the mat and over the top. That was rather impressive looking actually. Kane grabs Shane by the throat but Vince says Kane will go back, meaning to an insane asylum. Not even a match.

Dennis Knight is still in the dungeon. The Acolytes come in and say “he’s ready for you.” Knight is more scared by this. The he is Undertaker and Knight would become Mideon in a FREAKY ceremony the next week.

Hardcore Title: Al Snow vs. Road Dogg

Snow is the challenger and wearing a shirt covered in “blood” from a bloodbath from the Brood. Snow hides behind the curtain and we fight on the stage. The Hardcore Title was actually a coveted title at this point and not a joke. It’s very violent very early as Snow is dominating. He hits a moonsault off the barricade but Road Dogg moves, sending Snow through a table.

Big old cookie sheet (why are those under wrestling rings or in arenas ever?) gets two. They head up the ramp and off to the side towards the back. Dogg goes up a set of steps and does a flying leap to take Snow down with a double axehandle. We’re in a supply closet now or something and various stupid things are used as weapons.

They find a cart of potted plants to throw at each other. This is more intense than it sounds. Snow gets a steel pole and does some nice spinning and flipping (there’s a proper term for it but I can’t think of it. Think of a drill team) with it before driving it into Roadie. They go outside into the snow. Keep in mind this is Massachusetts in early January so it’s FREEZING.

Snow gets put in a wheelbarrow or something and shoved into a wall. The referee can’t stand up in the snow which is kind of funny. A piledriver on a wooden pallet pins Snow so Road Dogg retains (Cole of course says he won the title because Michael Cole is an idiotic douche).

Rating: B. Keep in mind this was a hardcore match and not a regular match when thinking about that grade. This was actually quite good and worked rather well. Road Dogg was cleaning up his real life a lot around this time and got off of drugs and stopped drinking for the most part and his in ring work went WAY up as a result. The push was kind of a reward for it and he would get the IC Title in two months. This was one of the better Hardcore Title matches I remember actually.

Dennis Knight is thrown through a door.

The Corporation jumps Shawn and beats the living tar out of him, throwing him into the window of a car. That’s all in theory that is as the cameraman was knocked down and we heard glass breaking. When we come back Shawn is bloody and in the windshield.

WWF Title: Mankind vs. The Rock

This is No DQ remember. This is the match that Tony Schiavone gave the ending away to on their show, shifting the ratings for the night because of it. DX comes out to back up Foley, because they couldn’t go to the hospital with Shawn or help defend him right? Rock of course has the Corporation with him.

Rock jumps him immediately and knocks him to the floor. He won’t let the Corporation beat them up because he wants to do it himself. How noble of our heel champion. Foley does his first sick bump of the match as he goes knee first into the steps and flies over them in a painful looking shot. These two always had mad chemistry together, which is something that could be said about most guys with Rock actually.

Rock does commentary during the match, which always cracked me up. He talks a bit too much though so Foley takes over. Foley does a promo of his own and we cut to a shot of Vince and Shane, but we hear a bell ring. Foley is down and Rock has the bell. Subtle. Rock Bottom through a table and Foley is in trouble. This has all taken less than three minutes so I’m not leaving much out at all.

To play up the spontaneous nature here Rock is in street clothes, as in the kind you would work out in. Corporate Elbow (debuted 5 minutes from my house) hits for two as this is ALL Rock. Foley with a spinning neckbreaker out of nowhere to get both guys down. Bossman throws the belt in and a shot to the head (sounded SICK) gets two as well. Double arm DDT onto the belt and Rock is in big trouble.

There’s Mr. Socko as the crowd has lost it. Mandible Claw goes on but Shamrock pops Foley with a chair. Billy Gunn takes him down and the brawl begins. Everything goes crazy and CUE GLASS SHATTER! Austin comes out and everyone loses it. He caves Rock’s head in with a chair and pulls Mick on top for the pin and the world title as the roof is blown off the arena.

Rating: A+. This was about a shocking moment and excitement and a feel good story and they NAILED it. This is very personal bias heavy, but they’re my reviews so who cares?

DX puts Foley on their shoulders as the Corporation carries Rock out. Cole gets in the famous line of “Mick Foley has achieved his dream and the dream of everyone else who has been told you can’t do it!” This is one of the best feel good moment in WWF history as Foley was considered one of the best to never be world champion as he worked as hard as anyone else but was never given a serious shot at it.

He got the shot tonight and he won the title. Road Dogg does the big announcement of Mankind being the new champion to a HUGE ovation. Foley dedicates the win to his kids and takes a lap around the ring with the belt to end the show. This is my favorite moment in wrestling history, bar none.

Overall Rating
: B-. I hate to use that grade as the show is far from average given the ending but the rest of the show is pretty bad. The last half hour is great stuff though which pushes the rating higher.

There was a very clear and predictable pattern for everything that wasn’t the main event and it got annoying after awhile. The ending more than makes up for it though as this was just perfect all around. Great moment and 100% worth seeing. If you even remotely like Foley I defy you to not smile a bit while you watch this.

 

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Wrestler of the Day – January 20: Pat Patterson

Next up we have Pat Patterson, who has a nice variety of stuff.

I was hoping to talk about his match from Rio to win the Intercontinental Title but my copy of the tape doesn’t work. Instead here’s a match from Australia in 1968 against Antonio Pugliesi, who was often billed as Bruno Sammartino’s cousin.

Antonio Pugliesi vs. Pat Patterson

It’s a crisscross to start until Patterson is armdragged down a few times. Pat is the heel here I believe and stalls on the floor to prove me right. Back in and Patterson grabs a headlock but is shoved to the apron for more stalling. Patterson heads back inside and immediately runs from a charging Pugliese. They slug it out in the ring with Antonio slamming Patterson down and putting on a chinlock. Back up and Antonio hooks something that might be a relative of a hurricanrana and since this is 1968 in Australia, the fans are in awe.

We go back to normal for this era with an armbar on Patterson who pulls at the hair in a failed escaped attempt. The hold lasts nearly two minutes before Patterson fights up, only to be armdragged back into the armbar. Back up again and they trade dropkicks, only to have Patterson get caught in armbar #3. Pat fights to his feet and sends Antonio into the ropes they ram heads to put both guys down. Patterson misses a splash but avoids an elbow drop to keep both guys down again.

Antonio is sent to the floor and punches in the head a few times before dragging him back in for some ramming into the buckle. They slug it out from their knees until Antonio slugs Patterson out to the floor. He kicks Pat in the head and Patterson uses the breather to pull out a foreign object. A shot to the head has Antonio in trouble but the time runs out before we get a pin.

Rating: C-. The match wasn’t bad but the armbars make it clear that they were killing time until we got to the draw. Patterson was such a natural heel that he could have the fans ready to kill him like it was nothing. This match would be filed under “it was a very different era”, even though the stuff was similar to what you would see today.

It was off to the WWF for Patterson where he would get a world title shot on September 24, 1979 in a cage against Bob Backlund.

WWFTitle: BobBacklundvs. PatPatterson

This is from September of 79 apparently. Patterson is the IC Champion here and is a cage match expert but Backlund has never been in one. Patterson was more or less the top heel in the company by default here. They start off fast as Backlund is all fired up here. Patterson tries to get out early and that goes nowhere.

Both guys get incredibly close but can’t get all the way out. Patterson almost gets out with Backlund literally dragging him back over the top by a single leg. They keep fighting to try to get out as this is definitely more about winning than violence which is fine. We clip the match to them being on the mat and Patterson hammers away on a cut on Backlund’s head. From what I can find only about three minutes out of 16 total were clipped so we get the vast majority here.

Patterson is busted too. Vince calls the WWF Champion a gallant lad. That’s sweet. Patterson goes into the cage and Backlund goes for the kill. He winds up going into the cage though so forget about that I guess. Backlund gets the atomic drop which was one of his signature moves at the time. I guess Lombardi will have to be gentle tonight.

Patterson finds some brass knuckles and they go up. Pat can’t get a shot with them and both guys go down. And then Backlund kicks Patterson in the head and the force of the kick launches Backlund backwards through the cage door and out to the floor. Patterson FREAKS in the ring after that even though he did nothing but lose cleanly. I guess that’s why he’s a heel.

Rating: B. Very solid match here with both guys beating the tar out of each other. Backlund was at this best at the end of a feud where he had to go off to beat someone and that’s what he did here. This was either their fourth or fifth match against each other and Patterson had beaten him before. This was fun stuff though and it worked very well.

Patterson is of course most famous for being the first Intercontinental Champion so here’s a title defense from January 21, 1980.

Intercontinental Title: Pat Patterson vs. Lou Albano

Patterson goes right after him to start and Lou bails. He stays gone far longer than a ten count but is allowed back in anyway. Albano kicks Patterson in the knees and tries a foreign object which is taken away. Patterson scoops the leg and starts choking away. He chokes with some tape and Albano hits the floor. Back in Lou gets in a shot with the object but Patterson pounds him down again. Albano walks out and takes the countout.

Rating: D. This was just for fun as Patterson was still very popular and Albano was only an occasional wrestler. There wasn’t much to it and that’s just fine as it got the fans fired up despite there being like 15 minutes left in the show counting another break. Patterson is a guy who isn’t remembered as well as he should be.

This brings us to Patterson’s most famous match in the WWF: the Alley Fight against Sgt. Slaughter on May 4, 1981 in Madison Square Garden. These two had feuded for months and months and it’s time to blow it off in Meltzer’s match of the year for 1981.

Pat Patterson vs. Sgt. Slaughter

Patterson is in street clothes and the brawl is on as soon as Slaughter gets inside. A series of kicks puts Sarge down and Patterson chokes him in the corner. Slaughter misses a big right hand and hits the post, sending him to the apron. Back in and it’s time for a whipping from Patterson with Slaughter selling it like he’s been shot. Slaughter finally sends him through the ropes and onto the apron to get a breather but Pat is right back with belt shots to the back.

Sarge finally gets in a blow to the ribs and takes the belt before sending Patterson throat first into the top rope. He wraps the belt across Pat’s mouth and rips Patterson’s shirt off for good measure. More choking ensues but Pat charges at the ropes to send Slaughter out to the floor. Slaughter tries to come back in off the top but only hits the mat to put both guys down.

Patterson slams him down and drops a middle rope knee before hitting the same sequence again. He bites Slaughter’s forehead but Sarge kicks him in the gut and drops a few knees of his own to take over again. A kick to the head with the combat boot puts Patterson down again and Slaughter launches him to the floor. Back in and Pat punches at the ribs before catapulting Slaughter into the post, causing his forehead to burst open. It looks like he was stabbed to draw that much blood.

Pat goes after the cut but a low blow puts him back down. Slaughter pulls out brass knuckles but can’t see Pat after knocking him out. His face looks like Ultimate Warrior’s paint job. Patterson is back up and wins a slugout before hitting him in the head with a cowboy boot. Slaughter still has the knuckles on his hand. Another boot shot has Slaughter reeling and a third puts him down. Sarge is knocked into the post and onto the floor where he takes out a cameraman. The crowd is LOVING this. Pat just unloads with the boot until the Grand Wizard (Slaughter’s manager) throws in a towel to stop it. Sarge wanted to keep fighting.

Rating: A. Great great fight here with Slaughter’s blade job being one for the books. This was as brutal as you’re going to get for this era and the fans ate it up. One of the key things here is that Slaughter got to save face at the end with the Wizard throwing in the towel to stop it. Patterson rose up to fight the evil guy, which is what a hero is supposed to do. Great stuff here.

After that war, we’re going to do some goofy stuff for the rest of the day. First up is from the May 10, 1999 episode of Monday Night Raw when Patterson teamed up with Gerald Brisco to face the Mean Street Posse in a loser leaves the WWF match. This is old school vs. new school and respect vs. young punks and couldn’t be more fun.

The Stooges vs. Mean Street Posse

It’s Rodney and Pete Gas here. The Stooges come out to Real American and rip off their black shirts to reveal a Brisco Brothers Body Shop shirt and an IC Champ in Rio de Janeiro shirt. Both guys are in riot gear helmets as the fans aren’t sure what to make of this. Patterson is taken down on the floor but Brisco comes back with amateur stuff on the punks.

Lawler and Ross keep saying BROTHER to keep up the joke. A double clothesline puts Brisco down but Patterson saves him from a belt whipping. Brisco comes back with a suplex on Pete as Patterson crotches Rodney. Gerald hooks a Figure Four and Patterson puts on a Boston crab to wake the crowd up for the double submission to get rid of the Posse.

Rating: A+. Seriously, this is just fun.

Pat takes off his shirt to do the Hogan poses. JR gets the infamous line of “AND HE’S SINGLE FELLAS!”

We’ll close it out with a very disturbing match: Pat Patterson defending his Hardcore Title against Gerald Brisco in an evening gown match. Just go with it.

Hardcore Title: Pat Patterson vs. Gerald Brisco

This is the result of a weeks long story of Brisco pinning a sleeping Crash Holly for the title, only to have Patterson pour champagne in his eyes and blast him in the head with a bottle to steal the title. Pat wanted to keep the title so he dressed in drag to hide in the women’s locker room. Brisco found out and did the same to chase Patterson because…..well because he’s a Stooge.

Brisco comes out with a 2×4 while Patterson has a stuffed dress, a big blonde wig and a shopping cart full of pillows and teddy bears. Pat grabs the mic and says they’re friends and should Gerald should just take the title to save their friendship. Gerald goes for it but gets hit low and spanked, revealing pantyhose. Patterson shoves a banana in his face and stomps the wig off Gerald’s head.

A Stinkface is blocked with a low blow as the fans are booing this out of the building. Brisco sends him into the corner for a bronco buster and chokes him with a blonde wig. We see bras from both guys until Crash comes in and beats up both guys, including a trashcan shot to Patterson for the pin and the title. This was named worst match of the year and I can’t say I disagree. They fight up the aisle and indeed, Brisco is wearing a thong.

Rating: Y. As in yeah…..moving on.

Pat Patterson is a guy who didn’t have the best skill set but he knew how to work a crowd like few others. That’s in the same vein as Jerry Lawler and you can see how long of a career those two have had. A lot of Patterson’s best work was in the territories so unfortunately we can’t see most of it. What we got though was good and it’s clear that he had a lot of talent. Check out some of his stuff online if you can as he’s worth a look for an education in making the most of what you have.

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