“This is Awesome!” Moment of the Year: Big Show knocks out Triple H
Trending Now (Hashtag of the Year): #BelieveInTheShield
Beard of the Year: Daniel Bryan
The following Slammy Awards were given out on WWE.com today:
“What a Maneuver!” Award: Roman Reigns’ spear
Faction of the Year: The Shield
“You Still Got It!” Award: Goldust
Couple of the Year: Daniel Bryan & Brie Bella
Tag Team of the Year: Cody Rhodes & Goldust
Feat of Strength Award: Mark Henry pulls two trucks with his bare hands
“Say What!?” Quote of the Year: Dustry Rhodes “huckleberry” promo
Best Dance Moves: The Funkadactyls
Favorite Web Show: The JBL & Cole Show
Best Crowd of the Year: Raw after WrestleMania 29 (East Rutherford, NJ)
Catchphrase of the Year: “YES! YES! YES!”
Smackdown – November 29, 2013: Why Smackdown Should Take A Lesson From Impact
Smackdown Date: November 29, 2013
Location: Mohegan Sun Hotel and Casino, Uncasville, Connecticut
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield
The main story coming into tonight is Cena vs. Orton being confirmed for TLC, but I can’t imagine we’ll get much on that at Smackdown. Other than that the big questions are what did the Wyatts do with Daniel Bryan and why did Shield take out Punk on Raw. The show likely won’t answer any questions but we might get a food fight because that’s how wrestling works around a holiday. Let’s get to it.
Theme song.
Here’s Renee Young in the ring to introduce Randy Orton. We look back at the end of Survivor Series where the Authority helped Orton beat Big Show with the Punt. Orton says he begs to differ with Renee’s version of things. First off he was playing possum instead of being knocked out. He didn’t need the Authority to prove he could beat Big Show. All that did was taint his inevitable victory. That brings us to Monday where Cena showed up to challenge Orton to the title unification match at TLC. Renee asks Orton about why he didn’t accept the match himself but Orton walks away.
We go to the back for the Thanksgiving party. Everyone is having a good time so here’s Vickie to let us know that this is a leftover party. She has everything anyone could want, but this will NOT turn into a food fight. There will however be an eating contest between Titus and Khali but we have to wait on the winner.
Curtis Axel vs. Mark Henry
Ryback and Langston are here as seconds. Henry throws Axel around as you would expect to get us going. Ryback gets in a cheap shot on Langston and the distraction lets Axel get in some cheap shots on the knee to take over. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Henry gets to his feet and throws Axel around like a small ferret. The JYD headbutts put Axel on the floor between two large muscular men and Ryback’s interference doesn’t work at all. Henry throws Curtis back inside for the World’s Strongest Slam and the pin at 3:08.
Rating: D. Axel is a guy in desperate need of a repackaging. The talent is there, but he needs something completely different after how badly he’s been crushed. At least he doesn’t have the title anymore. It looks like we’re setting up for Langston vs. Ryback, which is going to hurt someone in the short term when neither guy can really afford that.
Truth and Xavier Woods (in a Power Rangers shirt) are in the back when a ticked off Brodus Clay shows up. He gave them permission to use the music and Funkadactyls, not steal them. Brodus tells the rookie to watch his attitude and slaps him in the face. Truth and Tensai break up the fight as Brodus seems to have turned heel.
Back to the eating contest when AJ and Tamina crash the party. Vickie threatens to turn this into a food fight with the two of them against everyone else. That goes nowhere and we pan over to Khali passing out and Titus winning the contest. The win earns him a match with Antonio Cesaro tonight. Khali is covered in mashed potatoes.
Plymouth Rockers vs. Los Matadores/El Torito
3MB coming out to the Rockers’ music isn’t something I ever expected to see. JBL is WAY too excited to see El Torito. Torito gets things going with Slater as JBL refers to this as an inter-species match. The other Band members try to jump Torito but the Matadores dropkick them to the floor.
Torito dives through the ropes to take them out as the crowd is silent. Fernando gets stomped down in the 3MB corner with Drew draping Fernando’s feet on the ropes and firing off forearms to the back. A hot tag brings in Torito with a top rope hurricanrana followed by a flying headscissors. Off to Diego and the double Angle Slam ends McIntyre at 2:57. Comedy match and not a funny one.
Video on the European shows.
Tons of Funk vs. Xavier Woods/R-Truth
Tensai and Truth get us going with both guys escaping various hold attempts. Truth finally gets slammed down but blocks a charge in the corner with a boot to the face. Off to Woods who pounds on Tensai and kicks him in the jaw to little effect. An enziguri sends Tensai into the corner and it’s off to Brodus for the headbutt to the chest. A middle rope splash crushes Woods for the pin at 2:18. I like the idea of this feud. Stealing music seems like an easy way to start a feud but I don’t remember it being used since…..the late 80s?
Punk is worried that he hasn’t heard from Bryan and that he has bad ribs thanks to Reigns. He thinks Shield is acting on orders from someone.
Bray Wyatt talks about seeing mannequins in his dreams. Everyone is intoxicated in their own vanity but we all see symmetry. Bray insists that no one knows people like he does and that Daniel Bryan will be safe with them.
Titus O’Neal vs. Antonio Cesaro
Titus has a stomach ache which likely means a bad ending to this one. He grabs a headlock on Cesaro but gets dropkicked down, sending Titus into the ropes to hold his stomach. Titus jumps over Cesaro in the corner and kicks him in the face, only to make himself hurt more from the bark. Cesaro knees him in the stomach and puts on the Swing but Young comes in for the DQ at 2:00.
Titus is sick in JBL’s hat (censored of course) for the payoff. Zeb makes fun of Titus so he gets sick on Colter as well. This went on WAY too long.
The Raw ReBound covers the main event.
Tag Titles: Cody Rhodes/Goldust vs. Shield
Reigns and Rollins are challenging and Ambrose is on commentary. We get some big match intros and we’re ready to go. Cody grabs a headlock to start on Rollins as Cole asks if the Authority had anything to do with Shield attacking Punk on Monday. Apparently Cole doesn’t have clearance to get that answer so Ambrose says it’s Shield’s personal business. Cody slams Rollins down and brings in Goldust for a middle rope ax handle to the arm. Back to Cody who gets two off the front suplex and it’s back to the arm.
Reigns comes in and you can feel the match change in a hurry. Goldust bows up to fight him but is easily knocked to the floor. Back in and Reigns scores with an uppercut but gets caught by a dropkick for no cover. Everything breaks down for a bit with the champions clearing the ring as we take a break. Back with Cody working on Seth’s arm but not being able to hit the Alabama Slam out of the corner. Instead Seth sunset flips him down for two and kicks Cody in the head for the same.
The announcers talk about brothers being tag team champions and Ambrose asks a question we need a definitive answer to: are Edge and Christian brothers or not? Reigns comes in for some pounding before it’s quickly back to Rollins who chokes on the ropes. Cody gets caught in a front facelock by Reigns before getting dropped by a back elbow. Rollins comes back in but misses a charge, sending him out to the floor.
The hot tag brings in Goldust who clotheslines Reigns down a few times and a cross body gets one. Reigns breaks up the top rope cross body and sends Goldust to the floor as we take another break. Back with Goldust in trouble and being knocked into the corner by Rollins. We hit the chinlock on Goldust but he grabs a small package for two. A DDT puts Rollins down but Reigns knocks Cody off the apron to break up the hot tag.
Reigns clotheslines Goldust down for two and puts on a headlock. Goldust is taken into the Shield corner but comes out with a double clothesline to put everyone down. Now the hot tag brings in Cody with a missile dropkick and a sunset flip gets two on Rollins. Seth counters the moonsault press and sends Cody face first into the buckle to put him down.
Everything breaks down again and Goldust is sent into the barricade. Cody comes off the top with a nice plancha to take out both Shield members. Back in and Rollins avoids the moonsault press but misses the top rope knee. Cross Rhodes puts Seth out but Ambrose breaks it up for the DQ at 16:03 shown of 23:03.
Rating: B-. Do I really need to explain that a Shield match is good at this point? Yeah they do a lot of the same stuff in a lot of their matches, but they’re some of the most entertaining matches we’ve gotten this year. Cody and Goldust have awesome chemistry with these guys also so this was your usual very good TV match.
Post match here’s Punk with a chair to take out Shield. Vickie pops up on screen and makes it a six man tag.
Shield vs. CM Punk/Cody Rhodes/Goldust
The match is joined in progress as we come back with Punk pounding away on Ambrose in the corner. An elbow to the head gets two for Punk and it’s back to Goldust for a clothesline. That’s enough of the golden one so here’s Cody to pound on Dean in the corner a bit more. A backdrop out of the corner puts Ambrose down and here’s Punk again with a top rope ax handle to the head.
Ambrose avoids a charge in the corner and it’s off to Rollins, who is immediately taken down in a modified Indian deathlock. Back to Goldust to stay on the leg and here’s Cody for more of the same. JBL goes on a rant against Cole for reporting about the locker room, which somehow leads to him accusing Shield of helping Stanley Kubrick stage the moon landing. The tag champions stay on Rollins until Punk comes in with a backbreaker for two. There’s the bridging Indian deathlock with the facelock before it’s off to Cody for a half crab.
Rollins avoids a charge in the corner and brings in Ambrose as we take another break. Back with Dean slamming Cody down but charging into a boot in the corner, allowing for a tag to Punk. CM fires off his usual strikes followed by the swinging neckbreaker. He loads up the GTS….and here are the Wyatts. Punk charges at them but runs into Dean’s elbow and a beating from Reigns ensues. Back to Dean but Punk DDTs him at the same time Rollins is caught in a neckbreaker for a cool double team. Punk goes over to Goldust but the Wyatts pull Goldust to the floor for the DQ at 5:50 shown of 9:20.
Rating: C. This was much less interesting than the previous match. There’s only so much you can do with this much time, especially when Punk didn’t get to extract much revenge here. It wasn’t bad or anything but two tag matches in a row like this with mostly the same cast is a bit of a stretch.
Post match the brawl continues until the Usos and Mysterio head out for the save. Vickie comes out to make it a twelve man tag. Good grief.
Shield/Wyatt Family vs. Usos/Rey Mysterio/CM Punk/Goldust/Cody Rhodes
Back with Ambrose bringing in Harper to work over Jey Uso. Harper runs him over a few times but gets rolled up for two, meaning it’s time for Rollins to come in and stomp away. Seth stomps away in the corner and it’s off to bray for his hard hitting offense. Back to Harper for the Gator Roll into a front facelock but Jimmy gets in a cheap shot from the apron.
Rey comes in off the 495th hot tag of the matches but can’t knock the big man down. Instead it’s a big boot to Rey’s face for two and another tag to Wyatt. Bray hits a running splash in the corner and brings in Rowan for a swinging bearhug. A side slam gets two on Mysterio and it’s back to Ambrose for a front facelock. Rey gets sent into the corner and here’s Rollins, only to accidentally send Ambrose to the floor.
Mysterio gets in a kick to Seth’s head and it’s yet ANOTHER hot tag to Punk. He cleans house again and hits the suicide dive to Rowan on the floor. Back in and Punk hits three straight high knees to Erick in the corner. A neckbreaker sets up the Macho Elbow and everything breaks down. The Usos superkick two monsters and hit their dives on Harper and Rollins. Bray breaks up the GTS attempt on Rollins but Rey breaks up Sister Abigail. The 619 knocks Rowan into the GTS for the pin at 8:47.
Rating: D. Is it over yet? I’m almost afraid to say anything else about the match because it’ll probably turn into a 32 man tag match next. This went WAY too long and almost nothing had any interest to it by the end. We’ve seen these guys fighting so many times over the last few months and the last two parts of this dragged really badly. It wasn’t that it was a bad match but I was sick of watching these guys by the end.
Overall Rating: D. This didn’t work for me. The three tag matches are almost literally half of the show and the rest of the show is a bunch of thrown together nothing. For once, Impact had this show beaten. Last night’s Impact was another throw away show because of the holiday, but it actually had some storyline development. We got NOTHING here other than a tag match that went on twice as long as it should have. It wasn’t so much that the show was bad but it just didn’t matter at all, meaning there was no reason to sit through it.
Results
Mark Henry b. Curtis Axel – World’s Strongest Slam
Los Matadores/El Torito b. Plymouth Rockers – Double Angle Slam to McIntyre
Tons of Funk b. Xavier Woods/R-Truth – Middle rope splash to Woods
Antonio Cesaro b. Titus O’Neal via DQ when Darren Young interfered
Cody Rhodes/Goldust b. Shield via DQ when Dean Ambrose interfered
Cody Rhodes/Goldust/CM Punk b. Shield via DQ when the Wyatt Family interfered
Cody Rhodes/Goldust/CM Punk/Rey Mysterio b. Shield/Wyatt Family – GTS to Rowan
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It’s the fourth biggest show of the year and there’s actually a card for it now!As usual we’ll start on the pre-show. I see absolutely no reason for Miz to lose here. He’s coming off a heel turn and he’s against the jobber to end all jobbers in Kofi, so we’ll take what should e obvious here and say Miz wins.
Continuing the trend of easy picks, Big Show loses to Orton. It’s obvious they’re setting up HHH vs. Big Show at TLC because if there’s one thing this company needs, it’s more Big Show. Orton will be in trouble but come back somehow and cheat to win. I could see a scenario where Big Show wins and HHH goes to take the title from him but I don’t think they’ll go there.
Cena over Del Rio of course, which will likely set up a third match between them at TLC. Why WWE thinks anyone wants to see that is beyond me, but they make some very strange decisions in the main event scene at times.
Langston retains the title in the rematch. I don’t think this really needs an explanation.
I’m going to go with what seems like the logical move and say Punk and Bryan beat the Wyatts. The money to this feud is in Bray vs. the stars and it wouldn’t make sense having the Family get the win. That being said, I wouldn’t be complaining if they did because those two could easily be a nice fixture in the tag division. Punk and Bryan win but it’s a struggle.
Total Divas win because WWE thinks that’s what the people want to see. Then again I’ve said that for months now and haven’t been right yet.
That leaves us with the traditional Survivor Series match which is a hard one to pick. I’m going to go with the good guys here in a tossup. The problem here is Roman Reigns, who just does not lose in WWE. Unless he gets DQ’d or counted out, I can’t imagine him being eliminated. On the other hand, I just can’t see the Real Americans and Shield winning overall. I’ll take the tag champions, Usos and Rey but I wouldn’t be surprised if I’m wrong.
Overall the show looks better than it did a week ago but it doesn’t come off as important. Usually, and as is the case here, a show is only as good as its top match. Big Show vs. Orton is one of the weakest main events I can remember in a long time and that’s a bad sign for the rest of the show. Survivor Series can work as a major show but WWE seems inept at making it one. The show should be decent but it’s not going to wow anyone.
Monday Night Raw – November 18, 2013: The Raw Special
Monday Night Raw Date: November 18, 2013
Location: Bridgestone Arena, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole
Tonight Raw goes country because WWE hates me. The only things we’ve been told about for tonight is the band Florida Georgia Line performing and likely being confronted by 3MB. Other than that we might get a confrontation between Oakland A’s pitcher Jason Reddick and Daniel Bryan because they’ve been having a Twitter feud. This is what life is like on the go home show for Survivor Series in 2013. Let’s get to it.
The opening video recaps last week’s struggle to fill in the power vacuum left due to the Authority being on vacation.
Langston vs. Axel for the Intercontinental Title tonight.
Here’s the Authority to open the show. HHH talks about how things went nuts in the absence of true authority and no one likes chaos. Those who caused things to fall apart last week, such as Brad Maddox and Vickie Guerrero, will be dealt with tonight. This brings out a ticked off Randy Orton who says that the Authority is to blame for a lot of the troubles around here.
They’re the ones that gave Big Show a title match he didn’t deserve and thinks he can’t beat Big Show on his own this Sunday on his own. HHH gets in his face but Stephanie plays peacekeeper. Brad and Vickie interrupt with Vickie saying excuse me in a very timid voice. Brad apologizes but insists it was all Vickie’s fault because that’s the kind of guy he is. Stephanie doesn’t want to hear this and makes individual matches for the GM’s. Vickie gets AJ and Brad gets Randy Orton. The latter of those two is right now. HHH makes it No DQ because he can. Maddox tries to leave but Kane stops him.
Randy Orton vs. Brad Maddox
No DQ. Brad bails to the floor then does it again when Orton goes for him. Maddox gets on a mic and says Orton doesn’t want to do this but gets caught running away again. Orton tries to get him into the ring but Brad hits him with the microphone before sending him into the post. A DDT gets two in the ring and Orton is MAD. He throws Brad over the top rope and then over the announce table. Maddox is sent into the steps and loses his shirt before Orton posts him. The Elevated DDT on the floor knocks Maddox out cold. Back in and Orton hits him about 25 times in the head with the microphone until the referee stops it 3:50.
Rating: N/A. This was a glorified segment rather than a match so I’m not going to bother rating it. They’re going to turn Maddox face at this rate which isn’t a bad idea for the most part. They need someone with authority to stand up to the Authority, even though the Authority would likely just strip him of his job. The fans seem to be into Maddox too, which likely isn’t a good sign for him.
Maddox was take out on a stretcher during the break. As he’s being put in the ambulance, Vickie looks terrified.
Intercontinental Title: Big E. Langston vs. Curtis Axel
They treat this as a big deal with full entrances and the big match intros. Axel, the champion, is officially no longer a Paul Heyman guy. Langston easily takes him to the mat but gets elbowed in the face to give Axel a breather. Big E. easily tosses Axel around and sends him to the floor to start a chase. Back in and Langston clotheslines him down like it’s nothing as this is one sided so far.
A standing backdrop gets two on the champion but he hits a quick hot shot to get a breather. Axel pounds on his back a bit and we take a break. Back with Axel getting two off a dropkick and hooking a front facelock. Langston finally gets up and just throws Curtis off of him before scoring with some clotheslines. A belly to belly puts Axel down and there’s the Warrior Splash for two. The straps come down and the Big Ending gives Langston the title at 8:50.
Rating: C-. This wasn’t bad but it does beg the question: if they want to make Langston into a big deal, why in the world would you job him clean to Del Rio last week in four minutes? Either way, it was definitely the right idea to switch the belt here as Axel is long past the point of mattering. A gimmick change could help him a lot at the moment because the potential is definitely there.
Orton, in a jacket of all things, is with Shield in the back. He tells them that they’ll have his back because that’s what the Authority wants. Reigns is cool with that, as long as Orton has their back as well. Orton doesn’t say yes.
Time for our first country music bit: Divas musical chairs. The song is by Florida Georgia Line and played over the PA system. The girls don’t circle the chairs and it’s Natalya out first. Alicia goes next and a brawl is about to break out. JBL: “This is the dumbest thing I’ve ever seen.” Thankfully it only lasts about two rounds until the fight breaks out. Cole: “Musical chairs has broken down.” JBL: “It always does.” The Total Divas actually clear the ring, likely setting up another Survivor Series match.
Big Show vs. Ryback
They shove each other around to start with Big Show throwing Ryback into the corner for some right hands and a headbutt. A hard chop and a shoulder puts Ryback on the floor for a nine count as things slow down. Back in and Ryback pounds away before taking out the knee. Some forearms to the back and a leg drop get two and we hit the front facelock followed by a chinlock.
The hold stays on for a good while as Ryback calls a lot of spots. Show finally suplexes his way out before scoring with some clotheslines. Ryback comes back with a very nice spinebuster (all things considered) for two but the Meathook is countered into a chokeslam attempt. Ryback kicks out of it and hits the Meathook before actually hitting Shell Shock on Big Show for two. Ryback tries it again but Big Show shoves him away and hits the WMD for the pin at 7:57.
Rating: C. This is a good example of WWE not thinking more than a week in advance. Ryback hitting Shell Shock on Big Show was rumored to be a major spot at Wrestlemania, but here it’s used as a near fall in a warmup match on a gimmick Raw show. Why in the world would you use it here instead of using it to make Ryback look like a big deal? Oh wait: it’s time for Big Show’s latest push that no one cares about. How could I forget?
Post match Orton tries to sneak in but gets speared down.
Zack Ryder is with Florida Georgia Line when 3MB comes in dressed as cowboys. They’re the Rhinestone Cowboys this week and nothing funny occurs.
Orton is having his ribs taped up.
The Miz/Kofi Kingston vs. Real Americans
Real Americans vs. Goldust/Cody Rhodes for the tag titles on Friday. Miz gets caught in a quick wristlock by Cesaro before hitting the corner clothesline and the top rope ax handle for two. Cesaro catches him in a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for no cover before sending Miz to the floor and tagging in Swagger. Jack sends him into the corner for the Vader Bomb followed by the Cesaro double stomp for two.
Off to a quick arm hold, only to have Miz fight up and make the hot tag off to Kofi. House is quickly cleaned with all of Kofi’s jumps and dives, only to be caught in a powerslam for two by Swagger. Kingston spins around Jack’s clothesline into a DDT before going over to Miz for the tag…..but Miz turns on him, allowing Swagger to hook the Patriot Lock for the win at 4:45.
Rating: C-. The match was obvious as soon as they announced the title match on Friday. Miz turning heel is the right move as his face turn just wasn’t working at all. The guy is just a natural heel and wasn’t doing anything as a good guy. If nothing else maybe he’ll stop using the stupid Figure Four which doesn’t work at all for him.
Vickie pretends to have been attacked to get out of her match with AJ.
Stephanie doesn’t buy the injury despite Vickie being loaded onto a stretcher. Could it be because Vickie looked right at the camera before pretending to pass out?
AJ Lee vs. Vickie Guerrero
Vickie is wheeled to the arena, screaming that this can’t happen. I have no idea who the face is supposed to be in this thing but I’m sure I just don’t get what’s going on. Vickie “passes out” again and asks for some water before the bell. She tries to run again and actually gets by Tamina but AJ chases her down. Back in and the Black Widow (the only move of the match) gets the submission at 1:28.
Vickie faints again post match.
There will indeed be a fourteen Diva Survivor Series match on Sunday with the Total Divas against everyone else.
HHH makes a Broadway Brawl between Ziggler and Sandow for tonight. What does that mean? HHH: “I don’t even know.”
Dolph Ziggler vs. Damien Sandow
There are a bunch of musical instruments in the ring, mainly string stuff. Sandow throws him to the floor but misses a shot with an electric guitar. Ziggler dives off the steps to take him down as the announcers reference musical acts from the 70s and earlier. Back in and Damien pounds away before getting caught by a nice dropkick to send him back outside. Ziggler goes up top but dives into a shot from an organ to the ribs as we take a break.
Back with Sandow stomping away on Ziggler in the corner as Cole talks about Lawler meeting Ronnie Milsap. Ziggler comes back but misses a fiddle shot, allowing Sandow to hit him with a guitar for two. Dolph hits a DDT and breaks the fiddle over Sandow’s head before the Fameasser gets two. Sandow goes nuts again and launches Ziggler into the corner before ramming Dolph head first into a chair in the corner for a close two.
Ziggler gets thrown into the drums and hit with a guitar for two. Sandow misses a charge into the post and Ziggler rolls him up for two. A snare drum over Damien’s head and a bass drum does the same, basically tying Sandow up. Ziggler grabs the only remaining guitar, struts over, and blasts Sandow in the head for the pin at 10:17.
Rating: D. Was this supposed to be funny? That’s a genuine question. The announcers were treating it like a comedy match but apparently these two don’t like each other. I say apparently because I don’t remember them having any altercations in recent history, unless I’m forgetting some throwaway segment on Smackdown somewhere. The match was dumb as are most gimmick matches though. We’re also supposed to ignore Sandow’s shoulders being inside the drum and not on the mat.
We look at the opening of Raw and Big Show spearing Orton down again.
Orton goes into the Authority’s office and asks where Shield was earlier. He wants to know if he has the Authority’s confidence but Stephanie says they have to think about it.
Cena talks to Florida Georgia Line.
Here’s Cena with his arm in a sling again, saying he’s had to watch what Del Rio did to his arm on Smackdown every day since it happened. We get a clip of Cena winning the arm wrestling contest, only to have Del Rio put him through a table and lock on the armbreaker in a chair again. Cena says he came back for the fans but thinks maybe he came back too soon and shouldn’t be World Heavyweight Champion. Then he looks around and feels the atmosphere which makes him know he should be champion.
A champion is made of things like determination and toughness instead of cheap shots like Del Rio. Cena says Del Rio doesn’t know what he’s getting into on Sunday and he’ll walk out with the title. This brings out Del Rio who says we have a real superhero in the house. Cena almost made him cry, which Cena says is good because on Sunday he’ll make Del Rio tap.
Del Rio asks Cena to lift up the title with the arm in a sling which Cena can’t do. Alberto gets in the ring while talking about taking advantages of every opportunity. Cena says that’s what champions do and pounds on Alberto before trying the AA, only to have Del Rio escape to the floor.
Rhinestone Cowboys vs. R-Truth/Xavier Woods
3MB remember and it’s Slater on the floor this time. Woods is the former Consequences Creed in TNA and has been in NXT for a good while now. Truth starts with Jinder and we get some hip gyrations. Off to Woods for a dropkick to Mahal followed by a headscissors. McIntyre gets a blind tag but gets caught by a forearm to the face. Woods tries to fight both of them off and gets kicked in the face by Drew to take over.
Woods escapes a slam attempt and tags in Truth who catches Drew with a jumping kick to the head. The sitout front suplex takes McIntyre down again and the suplex into a Stunner sets up the tag to Woods. The Honor Roll (front flip clothesline) sets up the Best in the Woods (Eat Defeat though it’s called Lost in the Woods in NXT) for the pin on McIntyre at 3:15.
Rating: C. This was fine. I kind of like the idea of having Woods just show up in a match instead of some big buildup. I’m not the biggest fan of Xavier but he looked good in the ring and is a good asset to the company since he’s already got a masters degree and is going for his PH.D.
The winners dance post match.
The Authority says they have confidence in Orton but he has no Shield to help him on Sunday. When he wins, he’ll prove to everyone that he’s the face of the WWE. Orton promises to show them confidence.
Florida Georgia Line performs Round Here, the theme song of tonight’s show.
Shield/Wyatt Family vs. Daniel Bryan/CM Punk/Cody Rhodes/Goldust/Usos
There’s a lot of time for this. Jimmy Uso starts against Dean Ambrose with Dean taking him down with a shoulder, only to be clotheslined right back. Off to Jey vs. Reigns with Jey suckering him into the good guy corner where the tag champions work on Roman’s arms. It’s Goldust staying in to backdrop the now legal Rollins before hitting a quick uppercut and atomic drop. A kick to the side of Seth’s head gets two and it’s off to Jey, who charges into an elbow in the corner.
Rollins sends him to the floor but Harper tags himself in to get a piece. The two three man teams argue on the floor as we take a break. Back with Goldust working on Seth’s arm before bringing his brother back in for some right hands. Seth sends Cody into the buckle and the heels take over. Reigns comes in to pound Cody down before it’s back to Seth. Shield is intentionally not tagging in the Wyatts.
Ambrose comes in and pounds away in the corner before clotheslining Cody down for two. Rollins comes back in but has to stop Cody from making a hot tag. Shield finally brings in Rollins who gets taken down by Cody, allowing the hot tag to Bryan. It’s kicks a go-go with Bryan taking down everyone in sight. Harper is sent to the corner but Bryan has to go after Rollins, taking him down with a release German suplex instead of going after Luke. Bryan finally goes after the monster but gets caught in a running sitout powerbomb out of the corner.
The tag brings in Bray Wyatt for some hard elbow drops to Bryan. Bray looks over at Shield and asks if he can trust them before tagging in Reigns. Shield takes their turns beating on Bryan with Ambrose coming in for a modified STF. Bryan gets out and clotheslines Ambrose down but all five of Dean’s partners knock Bryan’s partners off the country as we take another break.
Back with Reigns pounding away on Bryan but getting caught in a DDT. The fans beg him to make the tag and get their wish as Punk comes in for the first time to clean whatever is still dirty in the house. He takes out every heel in sight, including Rollins and Ambrose with a DDT and neckbreaker at the same time. Punk hits the Macho Elbow on Ambrose but Bray distracts him from hitting the GTS.
Instead Punk slaps the Anaconda Vice on Dean, allowing the Family to break it up. Everything breaks down with the Usos hitting their stereo dives on the Family and Ambrose escaping the GTS into the bulldog driver for two. We hit the parade of finishers which goes too fast to keep up with. Punk and Bryan hit a Hart Attack on Rollins because they’re old school like that. The GTS to Ambrose is good for the pin at 24:04.
Rating: C+. This was more long than it was good but the ending sequence was awesome, as almost all parades of finishers are. Again though, why does Ambrose have to take the pin? There are five other guys out there but the only champion on the team has to get pinned? Really? Still though, good stuff.
Post match the Real Americans and other heels come in for the beatdown but REY MYSTERIO returns for the save, apparently as the fifth man on the team at Survivor Series.
Overall Rating: C-. I’m thinking about officially naming this kind of show the Raw Special: it would have been a solid two hour show but the third hour dragged it back to earth. There was some interesting stuff on here like Langston winning the title and Miz turning heel like he should have been all along, but then there’s the other half. Some of the stuff on here was horrid, such as the Cena/Del Rio promo, the AJ vs. Vickie “match” and Ziggler vs. Sandow. At least we fleshed out some of the Survivor Series card, but that doesn’t make this any kind of a good go home show.
Results
Randy Orton b. Brad Maddox via referee stoppage
Big E. Langston b. Curtis Axel – Big Ending
Big Show b. Ryback – WMD
Real Americans b. The Miz/Kofi Kingston – Patriot Lock to Kingston
AJ Lee b. Vickie Guerrero – Black Widow
Dolph Ziggler b. Damien Sandow – Guitar shot to the head
R-Truth/Xavier Woods b. Rhinestone Cowboys – Best in the Woods to McIntyre
CM Punk/Daniel Bryan/Usos/Cody Rhodes/Goldust b. Shield/Wyatt Family – GTS to Ambrose
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Monday Night Raw – November 11, 2013: Handicapped By Too Much Authority
Monday Night Raw Date: November 11, 2013
Location: Phones4u Arena, Manchester, England
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield
It’s a rare taped show tonight as the company is over in England. The main story coming in is Big Show being the new guy to stand up to the regime, having forced his way back into a job. Kane has also joined the bad guys and is now the director of operations, a position which hasn’t exactly been defined yet. Let’s get to it.
We open with a video honoring American’s military veterans narrated by John Cena. Classy as always.
We recap the angle at the end of last week’s show with Big Show getting his job back as well as a title shot at Survivor Series. The video also includes the handicap match and Big Show being put through a table.
The Authority (the official name for HHH and Stephanie) isn’t here tonight so it’s not clear who is in charge.
Here’s Orton to open the show. He thinks he’s going to win at Survivor Series and says that since the Authority isn’t here, he’s in charge tonight. This brings out Brad Maddox to say he’s the GM and therefore in charge, but here’s Kane before he can make his first match. Kane says that he’s in charge in the absence of the Authority.
Maddox says he’s actually in charge, so the opening match is Randy Orton vs. Cody Rhodes. Kane says no, because it’s Orton vs. Goldust. Maddox says not so fast and Orton says pick an opponent because he can’t fight them both.. Here’s Vickie to suck up to the Authority a bit before saying she’s confident in Orton’s authority. The crowd shouts her down so much that you can barely hear her, but she makes Orton vs. Goldust and Rhodes in a handicap match.
Goldust/Cody Rhodes vs. Randy Orton
Goldust gets things going and quickly hiptosses and armdrags Orton down for two. Off to Cody to stay on the arm as the fans are all behind the Golden One. The release gordbuster gets two and it’s back to Goldust who is stomped down in the corner. The fans chant Randy’s Boring before starting what I believe was a JBL chant. Now it’s a Jerry chant. Orton runs into a boot in the corner but kicks Goldust off the middle rope as we take a break.
Back with Goldust fighting out of a chinlock and catching Orton in a powerslam. A double clothesline puts both guys down and there’s the hot tag to Cody who comes in with a missile dropkick. A spinning sunset flip out of the corner gets two for Rhodes and the moonsault press gets the same. Everything breaks down and Cody fights out of the RKO before a double clothesline puts Orton on the floor. Orton takes the countout at 8:50.
Rating: C-. This was ok but the ending was obvious. I’m glad they didn’t have either side do the job as it would mess up too much momentum that has been built over the last few months. It’s interesting to see Vickie act like something resembling a face, but she’s not exactly the right choice for it.
Post match here’s Big Show (said to not be here in a story that lasted 20 minutes) to destroy Orton and chokeslam him through the announce table.
Big Show left during a break to go get a pint.
Los Matadores/Santino Marella vs. Union Jacks
The Union Jacks are 3MB (no masks or anything) in British flag attire. Santino has bull horns on his head. Slater and Diego get us going but Mahal makes a blind tag and gets two off a knee to the head. A 3MB triple team takes Diego down and it’s McIntyre with a stomp to the head.
Santino tags himself in and pounds away on Mahal but his headbutt hits knees. Torito distracts Slater and chases him around, allowing Santino to gore Slater from behind. McIntyre finally catches the bull but Los Matadores dive through the ropes for the save. Torito goes up top and dives onto Slater, allowing Santino to hit the Cobra (with horns) on Mahal for the pin at 2:55.
Brad Maddox apologizes to Orton when Vickie comes up to apologize as well. Orton doesn’t want to hear it but Kane comes in and tells Orton to quit mouthing off. Randy sends them all off because his shoulder is messed up.
Damien Sandow vs. Kofi Kingston
Damien is still very aggressive and pounds Kingston down to start. He puts on a chinlock before dropping a knee for two. The Wind-Up Elbow gets two more but Kofi avoids a legdrop. Kofi fights back with some right hands and a kick to the head but gets knocked off the top and walks into You’re Welcome for the pin at 3:50.
Rating: D+. This was just an extended squash but that’s what Kofi is good for. He’s probably never going to get past this level but he’s capable of putting on a good match with just about anyone and can make anybody look better. Sandow being aggressive is a decent idea and having a new finisher is the best thing that could happen to him.
Intercontinental Title: Curtis Axel vs. Dolph Ziggler
Cole goes into his Hall of Fame stat sheet as Axel grabs a headlock to start. An elbow to the jaw puts Ziggler into the corner and Axel stomps him down. They trade dropkicks for two each and Ziggler swivels his hips a bit. Ziggler takes him down again and drops the ten elbows for two. Curtis sends him to the floor and slaps him around back inside but Ziggler scores with a jumping DDT to put both guys down.
Ziggler avoids a charge and sends Axel shoulder first into the post before another elbow gets two. Axel comes back with a nice catapult into the buckle for two but Ziggler hits a Fameasser for the same. A Saito Suplex gets two for the champion but he takes too much time going up, allowing Ziggler to hit a middle rope X Factor for two. The Zig Zag is countered into a kind of release flapjack, allowing Axel to hit the neckbreaker into a faceplant for the pin at 9:09.
Rating: C+. This was MUCH better than I was expecting here with both guys hitting a lot of big spots for some nice near falls. Axel is a guy who can have good matches but he’s such damaged goods at this point that it’s almost impossible to take him seriously. Ziggler is clearly not going back to the main event scene anytime soon so having him do stuff like this is the right call.
Kane demands respect from Brad Maddox so Brad makes the Real Americans vs. John Cena in another handicap match. Kane one ups him by making Shield vs. Daniel Bryan and CM Punk. No handshake is given.
Zack Ryder is the WWE merchandise schiller of the night.
Tamina Snuka vs. Nikki Bella
Nikki gets thrown around as the announcers plug Total Divas. Tamina bends Nikki over her knee in the most awkward backbreaker you’ll see in a long time. We get more choking and chinlockery before Nikki makes a comeback with a backdrop from her knees and a headscissors where Tamina flipped over when Nikki wasn’t touching her. AJ gets in a cheap shot to put Nikki down, allowing Tamina to hit the Superfly Splash for the pin at 4:18.
Rating: D-. This division sucks but Nikki looks great so it’s not a failure. That is all.
Brie cleans house post match.
WWE 2K14 stuff.
Shield comes in to see Orton, who yells at them for not saving him from Big Show. They say it’s none of his business where they were during Big Show’s attack because they don’t work for anyone.
Fandango vs. Tyson Kidd
This is set up from a clip of a Total Divas episode that hasn’t aired yet. Fandango is in Union Jack tights for no apparent reason. Feeling out process to start until Fandango throws Kidd out of the corner and out to the floor. Back in and Kidd hurricanranas Fandango into the middle buckle. A springboard dropkick sends Fandango to the floor and a bad looking hurricanrana off the apron takes him down again. Back in and a springboard sunset flip is countered into a Fandango rollup for the pin at 2:59.
John Cena vs. Real Americans
Colter runs down England to start, saying that there are some bad people over here, ranging from monarchs to soccer hooligans to, dare he say it, Mr. Bean fans. Swagger goes after the bad arm to start as Cena’s underwear is sticking out. Here’s Del Rio with the Mexican flag as Cesaro throws Cena to the floor. Back from a break with Del Rio on commentary and Cesaro bringing in Swagger for a chinlock.
The running Vader Bomb hits Cena’s knees and John shoulder blocks both guys down, only to run into a European uppercut from Cesaro. The Swing is countered into an STF attempt but Antonio makes the tag off to Swagger. Jack can’t get the Patriot Lock but Cesaro goes up top, only to have his cross body rolled into an AA attempt. Swagger makes the save with a chop block to the leg but Cena backdrops out of a Neutralizer attempt.
Cena hits his finishing sequence on Swagger but the AA is countered into the Patriot Lock. John rolls out and hits the AA but Cesaro breaks up the pin at two. A powerbomb gets two on Cesaro but he comes back with Swiss Death for the same result. Cesaro loads up what looked to be a top rope huricanrana but Cena shoves him into a tag to Swagger. Jack’s running suplex is countered into a top rope cross body from Cena and the STF makes Jack tap at 12:56.
Rating: B-. This was good but was there ever any doubt as to how this was going to end? That’s one of the big problems with matches like this and how far down the Americans have been pushed: no one believed the team had a chance and even though there were some good spots, the ending was never in doubt.
Post match Del Rio goes after Cena and puts him in the armbreaker with a chair around the arm. Big E. Langston makes the save and gets a nice chant from the audience.
Del Rio complains to the bosses about Langston and a match is made for later tonight.
R-Truth vs. Ryback
Truth does an unfunny rap about Ryback on the way to the ring, talking about how Ryback is a bully with bad breath. Truth grabs a headlock to start and kicks Ryback in the face, only to be driven into a few corners. Ryback keeps pounding away with his power stuff, but the Meathook misses, allowing Truth to grab a quick rollup for the pin at 4:00.
Rating: D. And yet they wonder why Ryback isn’t over. He jobs to Punk over and over again, gets a win last week where he gets to show off, and now loses to R-Truth. The match was junk though with no one caring and mostly dominance until the quick ending. I’m assuming Ryback eventually gets his win back though, meaning we’ll be right back where we started.
Big E. Langston vs. Alberto Del Rio
Langston pounds on Alberto but Del Rio comes back with some shots to the head and a chinlock. The fans sound like they’re at a funeral for this match. Langston fights out with suplex and the Warrior Splash as the Wave has begun in the crowd. Del Rio hits the enziguri in the corner but Langston runs him over with ease. The Big Ending is countered into the armbreaker for the submission at 4:04.
Rating: D. GAH WHY DO THEY KEEP DOING THIS NONSENSE??? They want to push Langston as a big deal so their solution is to put him in match after match that he isn’t allowed to win because it would hurt the other guy. SO STOP PUTTING HIM IN MATCHES AGAINST THAT KIND OF COMPETITION ALREADY!!! Why is that so freaking complicated???
Veterans video again.
Axel is with a very damaged Heyman in the ring. Paul is in a neck brace, a cast on his leg and his arm is in a sling while sitting in a wheelchair. He blames Ryback for this beating because Ryback messed up by not being there to save him. Ryback bit off more than he could chew and Punk used the chance to destroy Heyman. However, the real blame is on every fan in the audience for cheering Punk on as he climbed the Cell.
Tonight though, Heyman is here to have every member of the audience as a witness to this statement. He’ll be back with a vengeance and hang over CM Punk like the sword of Damocles. Heyman talks about driving the sword into Punk when Punk’s music hits. Heyman: “OH NO!” Punk charges to the ring and beats up Axel, laying him out with the GTS. CM stares at Heyman and pulls a kendo stick out from under the ring. Heyman is spun around in the chair and then dumped onto the mat so Punk can destroy him with the stick even more. Heyman is also in a back brace to complete the list of injuries.
CM Punk/Daniel Bryan vs. Shield
Punk clotheslines Ambrose down to start before bringing Bryan in for a double suplex for two. Rollins comes in and is almost immediately caught in the surfboard. Punk gets the tag and kicks Seth in the chest for two but the GTS is escaped. Off to Reigns for a staredown but Bryan comes in for some stereo kicks to the legs. Reigns shrugs them off and clotheslines both guys down before taking Bryan into the Shield corner.
Rollins comes in but gets caught in a release German suplex and a top rope hurricanrana gets two. A kick to the head puts Bryan down again and we take our last break. Back with Ambrose working on Bryan in the corner before handing it over to Reigns for a headbutt. Back to Rollins as the slow attack but fast tags continue. A slam puts Bryan down and we hit the chinlock. Bryan fights up and sends Rollins into Reigns, allowing for the hot tag off to Punk.
Everything breaks down and the Macho Elbow gets two on Ambrose. Bryan’s top rope knee takes down Rollins and the FLYING GOAT drops Ambrose. Reigns takes out Bryan but Punk hits a suicide dive to take out Roman. Punk and Ambrose trade some insanely fast counters until Punk hooks the Anaconda Vice. Ambrose is about to tap when we’ve got Wyatts. We’ll say the match was thrown out at about 13:00.
Rating: C+. This took awhile to get going but the last few minutes were hot. Not a great match or anything though as the fans were entirely burnt out by the end. Also it didn’t help that everyone was waiting on the big appearance by the Wyatts but at least they waited until the last possible second.
Punk and Bryan wisely bail to the floor, leaving Shield to argue with the freaky dudes. Bray and Reigns get in an argument on the floor before fighting into the ring. Both teams get in a huge brawl but Bray eventually separates them, saying Punk and Bryan are the common enemies. Punk and Bryan get in the ring for a brawl and get beaten down until the Usos, Goldust and Cody make the save to end the show.
Overall Rating: D+. This really didn’t do it for me. The constant handicap matches got old in a hurry and the show felt like it didn’t matter at all for the most part. I’m not sure where they’re going with the Shield due to their actions with Orton but turning all three at them at once isn’t the best idea. Nothing at all on here felt important though and that can make for a very long three hours.
Results
Cody Rhodes/Goldust b. Randy Orton via countout
Santino Marella/Los Matadores b. Union Jacks – Cobra to Mahal
Damien Sandow b. Kofi Kingston – You’re Welcome
Curtis Axel b. Dolph Ziggler – Neckbreaker into a faceplant
Tamina Snuka b. Nikki Bella – Superfly Splash
Fandango b. Tyson Kidd – Countered sunset flip
John Cena b. Real Americans – STF to Swagger
R-Truth b. Ryback – Rollup
Alberto Del Rio b. Big E. Langston – Cross armbreaker
Daniel Bryan/CM Punk vs. Shield went to a no contest
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Survivor Series Count-Up – 1996: The Rise Of Steve Austin And The Debut Of The Future
Survivor Series 1996
Date: November 17, 1996
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 18,647
Commentators: Jim Ross, Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler
To MSG we go as we’re in a very different era here. Shawn is world champion but is also burned out and needing some time away from the ring. He’s defending against Sid tonight, but that’s not the important thing tonight. There’s a major debut, but aside from that, we’ve got Bret Hart returning for the first time since losing the title to Shawn to face a bald headed Texan who is tired of hearing how great guys like Hart are and wants to prove how great he is. His name is Stone Cold Steve Austin and tonight is his coming out party. Let’s get to it.
After a quick look at what’s been going on in MSG to hype the show we’re ready to go.
Team Furnas and Lafon vs. Team Owen Hart/British Bulldog
Doug Furnas, Phillip Lafon, Godwinns
Owen Hart, British Bulldog, New Rockers
The New Rockers are Leif Cassidy (Al Snow) and Marty Jannetty. Furnas and Lafon are feuding with Hart and Bulldog for Smith and Hart’s tag titles. Furnas and Lafon were a team who mainly worked in AJPW in Japan who were better than they’re given credit for. Apparently Furnas is the one with the long hair. Got it. I can never remember which is which. Lafon vs. Marty starts things off and they trade arm holds, but Lafon avoids a monkey flip. The Rockers are heels here if that’s not clear.
Off to Cassidy who is a better technical guy. Lafon goes after the leg but Cassidy comes back with a leg drag. Off to Phineas who spits into the air, catches it, and rubs it in his hair. Cassidy messes with Phineas and hides in the ropes as a result. A clothesline puts Godwin down and it’s off to Owen for some stomping. Off to Bulldog for more beating but I keep getting distracted by the agents and other people coming in and out of the door to the backstage area at the top of the aisle.
Eventually we get down to Marty vs. Phineas with Jannetty taking over with a jumping back elbow. Marty loads up his Superbomb but gets crotched. Phineas loads up a superplex (JR: “How stupid was that of him?”) but gets shoved down. Marty misses an elbow and there’s the hot tag minus the heat to bring in Henry vs. Marty. Phineas dives into the corner to stop Henry from hitting the buckle and it’s the Slop Drop (reverse DDT) to eliminate Jannetty. Owen immediately spinwheel kicks Henry to tie it up.
Phineas goes into one of his fits and beats up everyone, but Bulldog gets a blind tag and powerslams Phineas to make it 3-2. All three of those eliminations were in less than a minute so I didn’t skip anything. It’s Furnas/Lafon vs. Cassidy/Hart/Bulldog. Furnas and Bulldog start things off and Furnas is in trouble. Off to Cassidy for a spinning Rock Bottom for two. Furnas speeds things up but Owen gets a blind tag in and hits a sweet missile dropkick for two.
A fisherman’s suplex gets two for Owen and some heel triple teaming has Furnas in trouble. JR goes on another rant about how the two referees are making no difference here. This is during the time when JR had gone heel for the first time but it wouldn’t last much longer. Back to Cassidy who hits a gutbuster but doesn’t cover for some reason. Cassidy misses a charge and there’s the tag to Lafon, who hits a quick reverse superplex to eliminate Leif and get us down to the main two tag teams.
It’s Lafon vs. Bulldog with Davey being dropped on his face. Owen comes in with a cross body for two. A neckbreaker and a legdrop get two on Lafon as does an enziguri. Back to Bulldog who kicks Lafon low to keep control. Things break down a bit and Lafon hits a quick sunset flip on Smith for the elimination. It’s Owen vs. Furnas and Lafon with Lafon in the ring to start the last part.
Owen goes after the leg including an Indian Deathlock and the Sharpshooter but Furnas makes the save. Lafon hits a spin kick to take Hart down and there’s the hot tag to Furnas (pun intended). Doug destroys Owen with suplexes and a release German gets the final pin. Furnas beat him in about thirty seconds.
Rating: C+. This didn’t suck but it didn’t hit a level they were reaching for. Furnas and Lafon didn’t look right here and the crowd didn’t really know who they were yet, so the place was hardly rocking. It’s not a bad match but it didn’t quite work like it was supposed to. Things will pick up soon on this show though.
Kevin Kelly is in the boiler room with Mankind, who he abandoned Undertaker for at Summerslam. Tonight the huge rivalry continues with Bearer locked in a small cage above the ring. This is when Mankind was still relatively new (he debuted about six and a half months before this) and no one knew what to make of him yet. All anyone knew was he could beat up Undertaker which was unheard of at the time.
Mankind vs. Undertaker
Bearer has to be locked in the small cage. This is a Cornette Special. Taker lowers down from the rafters in what can only be called a Batman costume minus the mask. Taker also has on a new attire for this, which is basically a biker vest and leather pants. That would become his standard look for the next three years or so. Mankind rams him into the small cage to start and they head to the floor very quickly.
Back in and Taker gets all fired up before busting out a drop toehold. He goes after Mankind’s right arm to take away the Mandible Claw, which is the only hold that can stop Undertaker. Taker puts on a cross armbreaker of all things, which is something he would occasionally bust out when he was MMA Cowboy Of Death mode but I didn’t think he did it back here. Apparently if Taker wins he gets five minutes with Mankind. We head back to the floor with Taker ramming the arm into the barricade again. Back in and Taker misses an elbow but he sits up immediately.
We head to the floor for the third time via a Cactus Clothesline and they head into the crowd. Mankind charges at Taker but gets backdropped over the barricade and onto the concrete. A low blow puts Taker down on the apron and down onto the floor, where Mankind hits the elbow off the apron. Taker gets sent into the buckle but comes back with an elbow to the face.
Taker headbutts him halfway out of the ring as this continues to be a total brawl so far. Undertaker bites on the Claw hand but he lowers his head and gets piledriven down for two. Mankind loads up the Claw but Taker blocks the hands. The Tombstone is countered and there’s the Claw. Taker sends him out to the floor which is one of the first times that hold has been broken.
Old School hits but Mankind pops up and hits a double arm DDT to put Taker down. Mankind goes up but jumps into a chokeslam. The Claw goes on but Taker chokeslams him anyway. Cool spot. Taker tries a cross body but he crashes over the top and out to the floor. Mankind tries a flip dive off the apron but crashes just as badly as Taker did. Back in and Mankind tries a quick sleeper, only to be suplexed down by Taker.
Even JR is talking about how much more wrestling Undertaker is doing here which is indeed a strange sight. Mankind pulls out a foreign object to stab at Taker with. Unlike Lawler’s style, there’s an actual object here for Mankind to hit him with. Mankind climbs on his back in the corner but Taker pulls Mankind down and KILLS HIM with the Tombstone for the pin.
Rating: B. Foley said in his book that this is his least favorite of the series with Taker, which is saying a lot because this is a very solid brawl. It’s physical for the full fifteen minutes it runs with two large guys beating the tar out of each other. On top of that, it’s cool to see Taker work a new style while in an entirely new attire as well. Good stuff here.
Bearer’s cage is lowered to Taker but the Executioner (Terry Gordy in a hood) makes the save. Taker beats him up but Bearer escapes.
Sunny (still smoking hot and not smoking crack here) comes out for commentary.
Team HHH, with the IC Champion as captain, is ready for Marc Mero. Mark Henry was supposed to be on HHH’s team but he’s injured. I’m shocked too.
Team Hunter Hearst Helmsley vs. Team Marc Mero
Hunter Hearst Helmsley, Jerry Lawler, Goldust, Crush
Marc Mero, Jake Roberts, The Stalker, Rocky Maivia
I think you know everyone here. Stalker is Barry Windham as a kind of military guerrilla warfare character. This is Rocky’s debut, so who do you think the focus is going to be on? Lawler and Roberts are feuding as well. Mero has Sable with him here. Sunny immediately freaks out on JR for suggesting Sable is hotter. She yells about being natural while Sable is about to melt near the fireworks. Rocky’s outfit looks ridiculous with kind of a cape but made of streamers that goes over his chest as well. Apparently Roberts was a surprise partner and the replacement for Henry.
Jake comes out with the big yellow snake sans bag and chases the team off with it. Goldust and Mero get things going with Marc cranking on the arm. They both block hiptosses so Mero rolls him up for two. Off to Stalker who is now just a guy in camo pants and a WWF t-shirt. Back to Mero to fire off a bunch of hiptosses to Goldie who is a bit calmer than he was last year. Rollup gets two for Mero and it’s back to the arm. Stalker pounds away at Goldie’s ribs before it’s off to HHH. Off to Mero to face Crush as HHH wanted nothing to do with Wildman (Mero).
Mero grabs the arm and for you trivia guys out there, Rocky’s first official time in a WWF ring is against Crush. It lasts all of six seconds before it’s off to Lawler who is immediately punched, kicked in the face, and knocked to the floor. You know Lawler is going to go insane with the selling too. Lawler wants nothing to do with Rocky so it’s off to HHH. Vince explains that Rocky’s name is Dwayne Johnson and that he took the name of his father and grandfather to come up with Rocky Maivia.
In the first of many matches, HHH stomps away in the corner and JR is in football mode. Goldust comes in and drops an elbow followed by some rights to the head. Crush comes in and works on the back for a bit before it’s off to Lawler. Back to HHH as Sunny makes fun of Vince for allegedly having a toupee. Rocky pounds away and backdrops HHH before it’s off to Roberts.
Jake beats up everyone but tries to get to Lawler instead of going after the legal HHH. The shortarm clothesline takes HHH down but the DDT doesn’t work. Off to Lawler who makes fun of Roberts for being an alcoholic. Lawler keeps doing it and there’s the DDT for the first elimination. Goldust comes in next as JR makes fun of the lack of tan on Roberts. We hit the chinlock for a bit until jawbreaker gets Jake out of it. Off to Stalker as JR and Sunny talk about Barry wearing lucky boots. Crush hits Stalker in the back and the Curtain Call (reverse suplex drop) gets the pin for Goldust to tie things up.
Mero comes in immediately to hit a knee lift to take over. Goldie gets in a shot and HHH finally comes in to beat on the other captain. A backbreaker puts Mero down and it’s back to Crush. This is during Crush’s gang member phase and he couldn’t look more out of place with his partners at this point. A legdrop gets two for Crush and it’s off to Goldie. Back to Crush for another backbreaker for two. Things are slowing down a bit here.
HHH comes in again and puts on an abdominal stretch. He gets caught holding the ropes and hiptossed out as is his custom with referees. A sunset flip can’t get HHH down before he makes the tag to Goldust. HHH is back in about five seconds later and let’s look at Sunny! Ok I can’t complain about that one as much. Jake is pulled in sans tag, allowing Mero to hit a moonsault press on HHH for the elimination. That was a very messy sequence with all the tags with nothing happening between them and the non-tag to Jake. Either that or I missed a tag and Mero was totally illegal when he pinned HHH.
It’s Mero/Rocky/Roberts vs. Crush/HHH. Crush comes in next and is almost immediately dropkicked out to the floor. Mero loads up a dive but Goldust makes a save and shoves Crush out of the way. Back inside, Crush’s Heart Punch (exactly what it sounds like) pins Mero. We were looking at a replay when it happened though so that’s hearsay. Roberts comes in, misses the short clothesline and is Heart Punched out as well.
We’re left with Rocky (who actually gets a face chant in MSG at this point) vs. Goldust and Crush. He starts with the one not painted like an Academy Award and accepts a Test of Strength for some reason. A small package out of nowhere gets two for Maivia and here’s Goldust again. Rocky cross bodies Crush for no count as both bad guys are in the ring at once. Goldust hits Rocky low which isn’t illegal apparently but Crush Heart Punches Goldie. Cross body pins Crush and about thirty seconds later, a shoulder breaker (Rocky’s original finisher) gets the final pin.
Rating: C+. This dragged a bit in the middle, but it accomplished three goals: Roberts got to knock Lawler out cold, Mero got to pin HHH to continue their feud, and Rocky got to debut strongly. The problem is the rest of the match wasn’t much to see. Maivia winning over guys like Crush and Goldust is a good thing because it’s unrealistic to have him beat the IC Champion and beating Lawler doesn’t mean anything because Lawler is a career jobber in the WWF. Crush is a big imposing guy who is also a jobber, but at least he looks intimidating. Goldust has credentials too and a loss isn’t going to hurt him. Smart booking.
We recap Bret vs. Austin in arguably the real main event of the night. Austin has spent weeks or months talking about how what Hart did means nothing. Bret hasn’t been seen since Wrestlemania when he lost to Shawn. Tonight we have to see if Austin can back up what he’s saying against a rusty Hitman. The hype on this was excellent and still works to this day.
Bret says MSG is holy ground for him.
Steve Austin vs. Bret Hart
They stare each other down in the middle of the ring and Austin flips Hart off. This feels like a huge fight which is exactly what it’s supposed to do. Austin takes Bret into the corner and gives a clean break. Bret goes for Austin’s leg and they go into the corner as well for another clean break. I love matches where the guys mirror each other. JR says neither of these guys have ever submitted in the WWF. That’s not actually true but we’ll go with it for the sake of simplicity.
Austin actually wins a technical battle and cranks on the arm. Bret does the same and adds a hammerlock. They fight for wristlocks and Bret takes it to the mat, working on the arm. Austin fights up and takes his head off with an elbow. Bret stays technical, Austin turns it into a brawl. This is going to have some good psychology in it I’d assume. Bret takes it right back to the mat and cranks on the arm again.
Back up and Austin drops Bret with a Stun Gun and immediately chokes. Hit the neck, work on the neck. It’s not complicated. Austin stomps on the neck and throat before slingshotting Bret’s throat into the bottom rope. An elbow to the neck/chest sends Bret to the floor and Austin is starting to roll. Back in and Austin hooks a chinlock before dropping knees to the chest/throat for two.
They slug it out with Austin knocking Bret into the corner. Bret comes back with an atomic drop (which Vince calls a reverse piledriver because he’s Vince McMahon and isn’t a very good announcer) and a clothesline followed by a Russian legsweep for two. A bulldog attempt by Hart is countered by sending him chest first into the buckle. Austin loads up a superplex but Bret slams him down and hits a top rope elbow for a delayed two.
Austin escapes a backbreaker with a rake of the eyes as momentum shifts again. Bret gets sent to the floor and Austin just pounds on him with forearms and punches. Austin rams him back first into the post as the attacks shifts to the back. Bret comes back by sending him into the barricade, breaking the thing apart. They head into the front row and knock the barricade over. Austin is in trouble again and Bret chases him to the other side of the ring.
Steve is like screw this defense thing and sling shots Bret onto the Spanish announce table. They fight underneath the table with Austin pounding away. Austin was a smart heel in that instead of standing around, he wanted to beat on Bret even more when he had Bret down. Back in and Austin drops a middle rope elbow for two. A running crotch attack to Bret’s back gets another two and Austin is getting frustrated.
Off to an abdominal stretch and of course Austin grabs the rope. Back up and Bret wins a slugout before Stun Gunning Austin right back to take over again. A piledriver puts Steve down for two and Bret is exhausted. Bret hits a backbreaker and goes up, only to get crotched and superplexed down. Austin has that look in his eye where you know he’s feeling it. Bret hooks Austin’s feet after the superplex but only gets two.
Bret goes after Austin and walks into a Stunner but it only gets two. It gets another two and make that four. Austin is all ticked off now and pounds away at Bret before getting two more. He puts Bret in a solid Texas Cloverleaf but Bret still won’t quit. He makes the rope and the fans breathe a sigh of relief. Austin sends him into the corner but Bret’s knee gives out and Bret’s back hits the post.
That gets two and Austin goes back to the Cloverleaf. Scratch that as he makes it a bow and arrow instead. It’s amazing how much different that broken neck made Austin. He’s a completely different guy here and it works really well too. Austin grabs the ropes to block a Sharpshooter and there’s a sleeper but Austin hits a jawbreaker to escape. Austin slaps on the Million Dollar Dream but Bret climbs up the buckles and backflips onto Austin for the surprise pin. Steve is stunned, no pun intended. Apparently this was a #1 contenders match. Ok then.
Rating: A+. It’s Austin vs. Hart for 25 minutes. Were you expecting anything but a masterpiece? This match isn’t remembered for one reason: they had a rematch which is one of the greatest matches of all time. This however is liked better by a lot of people and I can easily get that. This is a pure, hard hitting wrestling match which ends with a wrestling counter. The psychology here is incredible with Austin wanting to prove he can go move for move with Bret before finally getting outsmarted when Austin was frustrated and trying one of his old moves. This is one of the best pairings of all time.
Sid is ready for Shawn tonight.
Team Farrooq vs. Team Yokozuna
Farrooq, Vader, Razor Ramon, Diesel
Yokozuna, Flash Funk, Savio Vega, Jimmy Snuka
Snuka is a mystery partner, Yoko literally must weigh 700lbs, and these are the fake Ramon and Diesel. Diesel here is more famous as Kane. Cornette is on commentary here and freaks out because of Snuka, who was inducted into the Hall of Fame last night. This is when the HOF was even more of a joke than it is today. Funk and Vader get things going as this match couldn’t be more filler if it tried.
Vader pummels him in the corner but Funk comes back with a kick that misses by so much that even Vince has to say it didn’t hit. Vader goes down anyway. Vader is sent to the floor and Funk hits a moonsault to take him out and send Cornette into heart attack mode. Back in and Vader powerbombs him down but it’s off to Yoko. That goes nowhere so it’s off to Farrooq vs. Savio. This is Farrooq’s debut with the Nation of Domination which is just him at this point.
Razor comes in and JR, the guy that brought them in, wants nothing to do with them. JR says he’d be a better manager than Cornette would. Cornette: “You couldn’t manage a Wendy’s!” JR: “I could if you were in town.” Razor can’t do the fallaway slam so it’s off to Diesel. Remember that this is New York City so guess how well this is received. Diesel pounds on Funk, Funk fires back, Diesel knocks him down, CAN WE GET THIS OVER WITH ALREADY???
Funk tries a sunset flip but gets chokebombed for his efforts. Off to Farrooq who gets flipped around by Funk but Flash walks into a snap spinebuster. Here’s Vader for some mauling before Savio gets the tag. Off to Snuka who charges into a Diesel knee. Vader vs. Snuka now and Superfly actually slams him.
Off to Savio who gets beaten up by Farrooq on the floor. Back in and Diesel Jackknifes Snuka for the first elimination. Off to Snuka vs. Ramon now with Snuka slamming him down and hitting the Superfly Splash for the elimination. Then everyone brawls in the ring and EVERYONE IS FREAKING DQ’ED TO END THE MATCH.
Rating: F. There was no reason for this match to happen, Ramon and Diesel were STUPID, Yoko was disgustingly fat, Farrooq was a waste of a debut, Snuka isn’t a good surprise at all. There’s nothing to see here and it was one of the worst matches I can remember in a long time. Also it’s less than ten minutes long, making it the shortest Survivor Series match ever.
We recap Sid vs. Shawn. They used to be partners and now they’re fighting over the title. Sid is nuts and that’s about it.
WWF World Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Sycho Sid
Sid’s name in pyro was always cool. The fans aren’t all that thrilled with Shawn but it’s not booing. Shawn charges at Sid and is immediately knocked down with right hands. The champ (Shawn) stands in one place and punches even faster which apparently is ok. Off to a headlock on the mat but Sid NIPS UP and pounds away. There’s a gorilla press attempt but Shawn lands on his feet. Sid tries the powerbomb (POP) but Shawn bails to the floor.
Back in and Shawn takes out the knee before hitting a Robinsdale Crunch (it’s a leg lock with Shawn jumping to crush the knee). The fans chant for Sid. Off to a Figure Four for awhile before Sid rolls it over. Shawn goes for the hold again but Sid kicks him shoulder first into the post. Sid slows things down and starts firing off some kicks to the head and ribs.
Shawn avoids a charge into the corner and goes after the knee some more. Sid kicks him into the ropes and Shawn skins the cat, but Sid clotheslines him right to the floor. Shawn gets dropped on the barricade which gets two back inside. Sid hits a few running kicks to the head in the corner as things slow down again. Michaels avoids a charge in the corner and goes up, with the fans openly booing him now.
The champ dives into a backbreaker for two and Shawn can barely get up. Shawn fights up and turns it into a slugout with Sid going down. We get the always stupid looking jump into the boot spot and Sid puts on a cobra clutch. Shawn fights up and walks into a chokeslam. The place is exploding for Sid here. The powerbomb is countered into a small package for two but Sid gets the same off a powerslam.
Shawn nips up and is immediately clotheslined down to a BIG pop. Sid grabs a camera and blasts Jose Lithario (Shawn’s manager) in the chest with it for no apparent reason. Shawn superkicks Sid down but stops to look at Jose instead of covering. The referee goes down somewhere in there and Shawn gets hit with the camera as well. Back inside Sid powerbombs Shawn down for the pin and the title. Girl in the front row: “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
Rating: B. Shawn’s heart wasn’t in this at all and that was clear throughout the match. His eyes didn’t have it in there anymore and it’s really no surprise that after February he would take time off to find his smile. This was good stuff for the most part but the ending seemed overdone. Little trivia for you: this is Sid’s first title in the WWF or WCW. You would have thought he would have gotten something before then, given the PPVs he main evented.
Shawn scrambles to the back to check on Jose.
Overall Rating: B+. There’s some awesome stuff on here with a lot of historical stuff in there too. There’s one really bad match but it only lasts ten minutes or so. Other than that, this show is pretty much golden. Solid show overall but the company was entering a dark age with the NWO destroying them. That being said, the Austin vs. Bret feud would continue for most of a year and would keep the promotion alive once they hit the double turn in the spring. Good show here and much better than I remember.
Ratings Comparison
Team Furnas and Lafon vs. Team Owen Hart and British Bulldog
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Smackdown – November 1, 2013: John Cena Is Awesome
Smackdown Date: November 1, 2013
Location: Tampa Bay Times Forum, Tampa, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield
It’s the first Smackdown after what I thought was one of the best Raws in a long time. We’re also coming off an eventful PPV which saw Cena and Orton win the titles, meaning there’s a good chance that Cena is here tonight. Tonight will probably have a lot more action rather than the mainly story driven show we got on Monday. That’s exactly how Raw and Smackdown should work if they’re going to have a single roster. Let’s get to it.
We recap Cena winning the title on Sunday.
Here’s Johnny for his first Smackdown appearance in a good while. During the entrance we look at Sandow’s cash in from Monday where he actually had me believing he would win. Cena talks about winning the title on Sunday and says that he and Smackdown are going to get real close very soon. He sucks up to the Tampa crowd and says the World Heavyweight Champion is here.
This brings out the Real Americans of all people with Colter thanking Cena for taking the world title from Alberto Del Rio. He says Cena has a lot in common with the Real Americans such as being a real American hero and supporting the troops, so Cena should join the Real Americans. Colter asks Cena to do the WE THE PEOPLE but instead Cena says you can’t see me. Cena says he sees three dumb people.
Swagger looks like Biff from Back to the Future so he should make like a tree and get out of here. Then there’s Cesaro with his giant swing but all Cena can see are his giant nipples. That leaves Colter, but Cena doesn’t have enough time to make all the jokes he needs. Colter looks like a cross between a drunk Yosemite Sam and the guys from Duck Dynasty. Cena says the Real Americans are the people in the crowd because this is the land of the free and the home of the brave, so everyone can look and sound like anything they want.
Cena tells them to get out of Tampa before violence starts, but here’s a ticked off Sandow before the Americans can respond. John gets ready to fight but Sandow calls him a hypocrite. He says you make your own way in America like he did when he stabbed his best friend in the back to win Money in the Bank. Cena has been handed everything since he got back which makes him a false champion. Sandow is still the uncrowned world champion and his purpose in life is to end the Cena era in the WWE. The heels get ready to swarm but Cody and Goldust come in to even the odds. Vickie, tag match, main event.
We get a Shield promo talking about how the Usos aren’t contenders and how they can beat any team on the planet. Roman is about to talk but Ambrose cuts him off, saying the US Champion and Rollins will prove Shield dominance tonight. The slow burn split has begun.
Shield vs. Usos
Rollins and Ambrose here. This is a result of the Usos helping make the save on Monday night. Jimmy and Dean get us going but Ambrose is quickly dragged to the Uso corner for a double back elbow to the jaw. Dean makes a tag off to Rollins but is easily taken down for a knee drop. Rollins trips Jimmy down though and stomps away as Shield takes over. Seth charges into a backdrop over the top and out to the floor, only to have Ambrose tag him on the way down.
Jey is sent to the floor as well so Roman goes after him. Cue Big E. Langston to stare him down as we take a break. Back with Ambrose holding a chinlock on Jimmy before it’s back to Rollins for a running forearm in the corner. Seth goes to the middle rope but dives into a right hand, allowing for the double tag off to Dean and Jey.
The running Umaga attack in the corner gets a quick two and a jumping kick to the face gets the same. Rollins comes back in and gets caught in a spinebuster. A double superkick knocks Reigns off the apron and as JBL puts it, “WE GOT A FLYING SAMOAN!” Back inside and Jey dives over Amborse into a rollup for the pin at 6:44 shown of 10:14.
Rating: C+. As usual the Usos are good for a solid performance in a tag match. Shield continues to have problems but it could still be awhile before they split. The good thing about them is you can mix up the combinations to keep the story going even longer like they did here. Nice match to open things up.
Post match Shield goes after the Usos but Langston makes the save. Reigns wants to fight all three of them but Rollins and Ambrose hold him back.
We recap the Shawn/Bryan segment from Raw. I still don’t think Shawn is coming back for another match but it’s possible. We also look at the Wyatts attacking Punk and Bryan.
Prime Time Players vs. Wyatt Family
Before the match, Bray appears on screen and says we live in a world of false heroism and he has the cure in the palm of his hand. Ashes, ashes, we all fall down. He stops talking and the Family is in the ring with Bray in his usual place. Rowan throws Darren around with ease before standing on his throat and removing the mask.
Off to Harper for a big boot and a front facelock while rolling around on the mat. Back to Rowan for a neck crank. Harper comes back in to knock Titus to the floor and puts on the front facelock again. Darren finally lunges forward for the tag off to O’Neil who cleans house. Young and Rowan fight to the floor but Harper scores with the discus lariat for the pin on Titus at 3:46.
Rating: D+. Just a squash here with the Wyatts getting to look strong before they head into their big feud with Punk and Bryan. The Players are fine in this role and can move up to challenge for the titles in a low level program if needed. Imagine that: actual tiers in the tag team division.
Darren takes Sister Abigail’s Kiss post match.
We look back at Kane joining the new regime and surrendering his mask to Stephanie on Monday.
Here’s Miz for MizTV which was supposed to have Shawn Michaels as a guest but we get WWE Champion Randy Orton instead. Orton says Shawn isn’t here because Miz is irrelevant and no one cares about his show. He wants to know why this isn’t a celebration of his 11th WWE Championship because Big Show violated the previous one. Due to that knockout, Big Show has been banned from WWE for life. Orton asks Miz how that makes him feel but hits the RKO before Miz can answer. As always, Cole makes it sound like Orton asked for more water at dinner.
Dolph Ziggler shills WWE merchandise.
Bella Twins/Natalya vs. AJ Lee/Alicia Fox/Tamina Snuka
Nikki starts with Alicia and quickly takes her down before bringing in Brie for a Poetry In Motion clothesline. Alicia brings in Tamina for a nice clothesline to take Brie down as the heels take over. Off to AJ for a modified dragon sleeper followed by a guillotine choke. Brie fights out and makes the hot tag off to Natalya who cleans house. AJ comes back with a quick rollup for two as everything breaks down. Natalya grabs a quick Sharpshooter for the submission from AJ at 3:37.
Rating: D+. I guess we’ve moved past the Bellas and onto Natalya now. This is probably going to be the season finale when someone takes the title from AJ because we need to make sure book the wrestling show around a reality show. That being said, I’d take Natalya any day over one of the Bellas.
The Raw ReBound covers the end of the show with Orton’s celebration and Big Show knocking Randy out cold.
We get part of a sitdown interview with HHH where Cole reads from David Otunga’s opinion of Big Show’s lawsuit. HHH gets tired of hearing about it and bans Big Show from the WWE for life. This would be more interesting if Cole hadn’t told us this earlier.
John Cena/Goldust/Cody Rhodes vs. Real Americans/Damien Sandow
Swagger and Cesaro running to the ring like they’re on a battlefield is great stuff. Cody and Cesaro get us going with Rhodes taking over off a shoulder block. Off to Goldust with an elbow drop before it’s quickly back to Cody for a jumping knee to the face. That gets two as well and everything breaks down. We take a break and come back with Sandow working on Cena’s arm before handing it off to Cesaro for the same.
John hurricanranas his way out of what looked like a powerbomb, allowing for the tag off to Goldust. Swagger gets caught by clotheslines and something resembling Stratusfaction before being backdropped out to the floor. Back in and Jack hits a shoulder to the knee and Goldust is in trouble. Cesaro comes in and pounds away before sending Goldie to the floor for a clothesline by Swagger. Off to Sandow for some knees to the chest and a near fall. Back to Swagger for a front facelock as the fans get behind the gold one.
There’s a hard clothesline to take Goldust down and it’s back to Cesaro for a reverse chinlock. A gutwrench suplex gets two for Antonio and it’s back to Swagger as we take another break. Back with Cesaro getting two on Goldust via a suplex and we’re back to another chinlock. Goldust fights up and drives into the corner for the tag to Cena but the referee didn’t see it. I love that spot.
The Real Americans do their Vader Bomb into the double stomp spot for another two count. Goldust finally comes back with a quick DDT to Cesaro but Damien breaks up the hot tag attempt. Sandow’s chinlock is broken up and Goldust heads to the corner for a jumping back elbow which mostly misses. The drop to the knees and uppercut staggers Sandow but he still knocks Cody and Cena to the floor. A powerslam puts Damien down again and NOW we get the hot tag to Rhodes.
Cody comes in with a springboard dropkick to Sandow followed by the moonsault press (he’s gotten much better at that move) for two. Damien counters Cross Rhodes and makes a tag to Cesaro but there Cross Rhodes takes Sandow out anyway. The distraction lets Antonio come in for a 31 second Cesaro Swing to Rhodes for two. During the Swing Cena speared Swagger on the floor so there’s no one for Cesaro to tag.
The second hot tag brings in Cena who initiates his finishing sequence on Cesaro but the AA is countered into the gutwrench suplex. Cesaro loads up the Swing on Cena but Cena counters into an STF attempt. Antonio rolls through and hits Swiss Death, only to have Cody score with a Disaster Kick to the European. Sandow hits You’re Welcome on Cody but gets bulldogged down by Goldust. Swagger gets the tag and suplexes Goldust down before putting Cena in the Patriot Lock. Cena rolls out and hits a quick AA for the pin at 16:58 shown of 23:58.
Rating: A-. If you’re looking for an old school tag team formula match with a hot ending, go find this match immediately. Awesome stuff here with everyone looking good and a great heat segment on Goldust. If there’s anyone out there that can make someone look like a million bucks better than Cena, I’d love to see them, as he gave Sandow his best match ever and now made the Real Americans look competent. Great main event.
Overall Rating: B. Not a lot happened here but after Monday there wasn’t much left to do tonight. This show is reminiscent of some old In Your House shows: nothing special for the first parts but them an awesome main event takes up the last fourth of the show to save most of it. The opening tag match was decent enough and the other tags weren’t that bad so overall this was good stuff.
Results
Usos b. Shield – Rollup to Ambrose
Wyatt Family b. Prime Time Players – Discus lariat to O’Neil
Bella Twins/Natalya b. AJ Lee/Tamina Snuka/Alicia Fox – Sharpshooter to Lee
Goldust/John Cena/Cody Rhodes b. Real Americans/Damien Sandow – AA to Swagger
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Smackdown – October 25, 2013: The Main Event Needs Five
Smackdown Date: October 25, 2013
Location: Birmingham-Jefferson Civic Center, Birmingham, Alabama
Commentators: John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole
We’re finally at the last show before the Cell PPV which technically has been built up for about two months now, depending on how you look at it. The main story coming out of Monday is that Big Show is indeed still around despite being in a bunch of lawsuits both for and against him which is riveting television if I’ve ever heard of it. This company is in desperate need of a new top story but I wouldn’t look for that to change anytime soon. Let’s get to it.
The opening video recaps the HHH/Big Show stuff from Raw including the Bryan vs. Orton contract signing.
We open with Cole in the ring for a sitdown interview with HHH. Hasn’t he had two or three of these already recently? Cole asks HHH about Big Show’s actions on Monday which HHH say caused six technical employees to be fired. There’s yet another lawsuit against Big Show on charges not important enough to specify so HHH can’t comment. Big Show is however fired, period. Cole asks about Big Show showing up either Sunday or tonight but HHH says he can’t comment.
Cole gives up on the point and asks about Cena vs. Del Rio with HHH saying he can’t wait for Cena’s return. He knows what it’s like to come back from a devastating injury and he can’t wait to see Cena come back. That’s enough Cena talk so Cole asks about the other world title, drawing a YES chant. When asked about the Shawn Michaels element, HHH says he’s thrilled because Shawn is indeed his friend and will make sure the job gets done. Shawn will do the right thing at the end of the day so HHH isn’t worried. Cole asks what the right thing is but here’s Bryan before he can answer.
Cole heads to the floor as Bryan asks HHH the same question: what is the right thing? Bryan thinks it’s to let himself and Orton settle everything once and for all. You lock both of them in the Cell and no one gets out until there’s a winner. Bryan says Shawn may be HHH’s best friend but he’s also his own man, so he’ll do what’s best for business. When everything is fair and even, Bryan is going to prove HHH wrong. A loud YES chant takes us out.
Usos vs. Wyatt Family
Miz is on commentary. We get the full Siva Tao from the Usos which as usual gets a huge response. Miz sums up Bray’s look quite well: “He looks like Charles Manson fell asleep at a Jimmy Buffet concert.” Jimmy avoids a shot from the back by Harper but gets run over by Rowan just after the bell. A big boot from Harper puts him down as well and a Michinoku Driver of all things gets two.
Jimmy crawls over to make the tag to Jey and Harper is immediately caught in a Samoan drop. Everything breaks down and the Family is sent to the floor so Jimmy can hit a suicide dive but Harper breaks up Jey’s with a forearm. Bray and Miz both stand up with Miz decking Wyatt in the face. Rowan chases Miz to the back, allowing the Usos to hit a double superkick to Harper for the pin at 2:35.
AJ Lee vs. Nikki Bella
I believe this is Nikki’s first singles match back since her leg injury. AJ bails to the floor to start to hide behind Tamina. The not so bright Nikki goes after her and gets her neck snapped across the top rope. A neckbreaker puts Nikki down for two and we’re already in the chinlock. Nikki fights up with some clotheslines as Tamina throws Brie into the steps. The distraction lets AJ hook the Black Widow for the submission at 2:31.
We see Cena vs. Alberto Del Rio as per WWE ’14.
Here’s the Cena career retrospective from Raw. Based on these videos, you would think Cena had been gone for about two years instead of nine weeks.
We go to the back where Bray Wyatt wants us to follow him. He steps aside and shows us a chained up and unconscious Miz with the sheep mask on his face and the word “liar” written on his chest. This is the kind of creepy stuff they need to get back to with the Wyatts.
3MB vs. Los Matadores
In case the first four or five times didn’t fulfill your needs for this pairing. During the entrances we see the HILARIOUS goring of Zeb Colter again. I know it’s hilarious because Cole tells us that it is over and over. Before the match the Real Americans come out to watch. Mahal is the one on the floor this time.
McIntyre jumps Diego to start before it’s quickly off to Slater who gets two off a knee lift. A double slingshot suplex gets two more on Diego and we hit the armbar from Drew. Diego fights up and makes the tag off to Fernando who cleans house and tags in Diego for a downward spiral/bulldog combo for the pin on Drew at 2:06.
Post match Mahal gets gored and taken down by a top rope Asai moonsault. Colter says he didn’t lay face down in Cambodia so deviant men can kidnap a small person and force him into a bull costume. Apparently there’s a tag match on Sunday.
Ryback/Paul Heyman vs. CM Skunk
You read the name right. This is No DQ as a preview for Sunday. Heyman says this will be a demonstration of the teamwork you’ll see inside the Cell on Sunday. Skunk comes out to Punk’s music and in a black hoodie but the fans quickly catch on to the joke. He has a skunk stripe painted into his hair. Ryback destroys him with the ease you would expect and hits two powerbombs in a row. Heyman pulls a kendo stick out from under the ring and hits about twenty shots to Skunk’s back. Shell Shock ends Skunk with Heyman getting the pin at 2:42.
Heyman says that Skunk may have been a parody, but the same thing is going to happen on Sunday. Punk’s face will be raked across the Cell and he’ll be beaten badly enough that Heyman can get the pin again.
Vickie thinks CM Skunk is hilarious and spells out the joke for us by telling us that it sounds like CM Punk. Langston comes in and says he’s ready for the main event since Miz is out. Vickie doesn’t think so but Langston says he didn’t realize he was talking to Brad Maddox. That’s enough to get him Miz’s spot in the eight man tag tonight.
Here’s Alberto Del Rio for his final speech before facing Cena on Sunday. People have been telling him he’s crazy but people have been building monuments to him in Mexico. Babies are being named after him because he’s so amazing. On the other hand you have Americans who only have John Cena to cheer for. Alberto promises to put Cena in the cross armbreaker and never let it go no matter what the fans think of him.
R-Truth shills merchandise again but Santino comes in to try his luck. The (up to) 20% off sale is still on WWE.com if you enter the promo code COBRA.
Great Khali vs. Fandango
Fandango chops away to start and is immediately thrown down. Khali hits his big overhand chop in the corner but Fandango hits a jumping enziguri to put Khali down in the corner. The announcers are talking about Big Show and JBL references Copernicus just like he did on NXT, saying the world clearly revolves around Big Show instead of the sun. Summer Rae and Natalya get in a fight on the floor which stumbles into the ring for the DQ at 1:45. Can we get a match longer than three minutes tonight?
Randy Orton/Shield vs. Daniel Bryan/Big E. Langston/Goldust/Cody Rhodes
That’s quite the main event. Cody and Dean get things going with Rhodes taking the US Champion into the good corner for a tag off to Goldust. Goldie sends Ambrose out to the floor and we take an early break. Back with Rollins chopping away at Langston, only to be taken down with a belly to belly suplex. Cody comes back in and gets two off a sunset flip out of the corner, only to have Seth send him face first into the middle turnbuckle.
The fast Shield tags begin with Reigns coming in to chop away, only to have Cody pull him over to the corner for a tag off to Bryan. Daniel takes Roman down by the leg and does the double knee stomp out of the surfboard. Off to Langston for some shoulders in the corner and a tag off to Goldust. Reigns misses a charge into the corner and Goldust gets two off a top rope spinning cross body. The fans aren’t exactly thrilled with the match so far.
Back to Cody who gets taken into the Shield corner for a pounding from Ambrose and an eye rake across the top rope. Orton gets his first tag and pounds away on his former Legacy teammate, only to have Cody come back with a clothesline for two. A suplex gets the same and it’s back to Goldust for a few seconds before Cody comes in again and slugs on Randy some more. Randy comes back by dropping Cody ribs first over the top rope and makes the tag off to Ambrose.
Dean takes Cody to the outside and rams him into the barricade. It’s quickly back to Orton who misses a knee drop but catches Cody in the backbreaker out of the corner for two. We take another break and come back with Reigns slamming Cody down for two. Back to Rollins who grabs Cody’s leg to break up a hot tag attempt. Dean runs into a boot in the corner but he makes a blind tag to Seth, only to have Cody catch him diving off the top. The hot tag brings in Goldust to wake up the crowd and he backdrops Rollins down with ease.
Reigns makes another blind tag and takes Goldust down with a clothesline. Shield takes over on Goldust in the corner with the rapid tags continuing. Orton comes back in to stomp Goldie down into the corner before Reigns and Rollins come in within about 8 seconds of each other. Goldust comes back with a double bulldog and there’s the hot tag to Bryan. Daniel cleans house and sends Rollins to the outside. Reigns gets the same treatment, leaving Daniel alone with Dean.
Bryan backflips over Ambrose in the corner but instead of clotheslining Dean down it’s the FLYING GOAT to take out Orton. The missile dropkicks takes Dean down and here come the YES kicks. Reigns breaks up the YES Lock but Langston runs Roman over. Rollins escapes the Big Ending but a Disaster Kick takes Seth to the floor. Cody dives off the top to take out Rollins and Reigns but Bryan misses the running dropkick in the corner. Back to Orton for the Elevated DDT but Langston distracts him, allowing Bryan to hit the running knee for the pin at 15:58 shown of 22:58.
Rating: B. Nice main event here which got the time it needed to build up. Bryan pinning Orton to end things probably isn’t a good sign leading into the PPV but at this point I’ll take anything to get us to a new main event program. Everyone looked good here and I like the idea of Langston in the main event scene.
Celebrating ends the show.
Overall Rating: C. This is a tricky one to rate. The main event is solid and takes up about ¼ of the show, but the rest of it was pure filler the entire way through. I did like the Wyatts kidnapping and labeling Miz for lack of a better term. There’s potential in those guys and a win over a former world champion isn’t going to hurt Bray at all. The show went by quickly which is a good idea and the whole thing did a decent enough job of building up the PPV on Sunday. Not bad here but nothing really worth seeing, other than maybe the main event if you’re bored.
Results
Usos b. Wyatt Family – Double superkick to Harper
AJ Lee b. Nikki Bella – Black Widow
Los Matadores b. 3MB – Downward spiral/bulldog combination to McIntyre
Paul Heyman/Ryback b. CM Skunk – Heyman pinned Skunk after a Shell Shock from Ryback
Fandango vs. Great Khali went to a no contest when Natalya and Summer Rae interfered
Daniel Bryan/Goldust/Cody Rhodes/Big E. Langston b. Randy Orton/Shield – Running knee to Orton
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On This Day: October 21, 2002 – Monday Night Raw: There’s No Easy Way Here. It’s Katie Vick.
Monday Night Raw
Date: October 21, 2002
Location: Bridgestone Arena, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler
Oh look: a Raw from 2002. This is I think the twelfth episode I’ve done from this show, and you would think it would be something fun. Instead, it’s the KATIE VICK EPISODE! Yep, this is the show where HHH climbs in a casket and rapes a mannequin, because this is a wrestling show baby! I think that about covers it. It’s the night after No Mercy and HHH is the champion of all that is Raw as the IC Title has been knocked out for the next eight months or so. Let’s get to it.
We open with a recap of the Katie Vick story. HHH claims Kane is a murderer, but Kane says it was an accident. This is the night after HHH beat Kane to unify the IC and World Titles but the feud must continue for some reason.
Here’s HHH along with Flair to open the show. HHH talks about how he’s proven the writers wrong when they said he didn’t deserve to be handed the title. He ended the IC Title last night and there’s no one that can do anything about it. HHH calls himself unstoppable and says that he might be the greatest world champion ever. Flair has a video that explains the Katie Vick ordeal. Oh boy. Kane isn’t here yet, but apparently tonight it’s Kane/RVD vs. HHH/Flair. This brings out Hurricane, Kane’s other partner, to beat up HHH and take the tape, but HHH beats Hurricane down and takes it back.
Jeff Hardy vs. Christopher Nowitski
Chris takes him down to start and Jeff is getting frustrated, which would be a recurring theme for him for the next few weeks. Jeff sends him to the floor and hits a big flipping dive to take over. Nowitski gets in a shot back inside and gets a few two counts. Hardy comes back with a Thesz Press and actually uses it as a pinning combination. Nowitski chokes away in the corner and gets two off a rolling side cradle.
A gutbuster gets another two on Hardy and this match isn’t going anywhere. Jeff fires away but walks into a hot shot for two. A spinning double underhook slam gets two for Chris and here comes Jeff’s real comeback. He fires away with right hands and a jawbreaker but Chris moves before the Swanton launches. Chris brings in a chair but Al Snow comes in to break it up. The chair winds up hitting Chris in the head but Snow pulls Nowitski away from the Swanton. It hits the chair and Chris steals the pin.
Rating: D. This just kept going. Nowitski was a great base for a character but he never got off the ground. The guy just wasn’t that good. He wasn’t especially bad but he just wasn’t that good. This match didn’t work well for the most part and Hardy would start turning heel soon after this, which didn’t work at all.
Eric Bischoff, the GM, is watching Big Show intimidate him recently. Stacy comes in to ask to referee a match tonight. Eric says yeah whatever but not the main event. Stacy leaves and here’s Show. Eric gives Show Jamal, Rico and Rosey tonight.
Snow talks to Dreamer about costing Dreamer a match recently. They have a Singapore cane match tonight. Dreamer leaves and Nowitski comes up. Nowitski doesn’t want/need Al’s help. Ok then.
Lance Storm/William Regal vs. Bubba Ray Dudley/Spike Dudley
The winners get a title shot against whoever the champions are now. Apparently it’s Christian/Jericho. Storm runs down American before the match. Spike vs. Storm to start things off with the smaller dude taking over quickly. The fans want tables but other than that things are mostly silent. We’ve lost commentary for some reason and by the time that sentence is finished JR is back.
Off to Bubba who takes Lance down with a neckbreaker but Regal hits Bubba in the back of his recently concussed head to give Storm the advantage. Regal comes in as Kane arrives in the back. Everything breaks down and Spike ranas Storm off the top. Bubba catches the superkick from Storm and hits the Bubba Bomb. Spoke hits the Dudley Dog on Regal for the win and the title shot.
Rating: C-. This was one of those matches that was too short to go anywhere of note. Regal and Storm as the Unamericans were a solid team but the gimmick was only going to go so far, especially with Test weighing them down as their third man. Nothing to see here and thankfully D-Von would reunite with Bubba the next month.
Storm kicks Bubba in the head post match and Spike gets hit in the ribs over and over by Regal’s brass knuckles.
Trish is having her picture taken and has to talk to the photographer about her match with Victoria from last night. Jericho and Christian pop up and call Trish a w****. Apparently Jericho thinks Trish wants him. Geez is this some extreme foreshadowing? I really doubt it.
Here’s Eric with something to say. He praises last night’s HIAC match with Brock vs. Taker (it really was good) but he’s going to top it. How is he going to do that? Something called the Elimination Chamber. No word on what that is yet.
Test vs. D’Lo Brown
Stacy is referee so she can wear a revealing outfit. Test looks like an idiot with long hair and short tights. Stacy slaps Brown and rings the bell. Test launches him over with a big backdrop and pounds away in the corner. Brown gets his feet up to block a charge followed by a flying forearm. Brown drops a leg but Stacy interferes again. The Sky High hits but Stacy is tying her shoe instead of counting. The big boot from Test and a fast count give the Canadian the win. Stacy jumps in Test’s arms post match.
Victoria says that she isn’t lying about Trish sleeping her way to the top. Victoria is still insane here. Goldust pops up behind her to make fun of her in a Dustyesque voice. Booker shows up as well to do the same, minus the American Dream part.
Trish Stratus/Booker T/Goldust vs. Victoria/Chris Jericho/Christian
Trish has her full entrance and look down now. Jericho and Christian are tag champions which I think I mentioned earlier. The girls brawl to start and Trish fires off her kicks in the corner. Victoria drop toeholds her onto the bottom rope and it’s off to Christian vs. Trish as the genders don’t have to match here. Booker comes in to make this a bit more fair for Christian. A forearm puts Christian down and a side kick gets two. Victoria and her awesome rack distracts Booker and the Canadians take over.
Off to Jericho who pounds away but gets caught in the spinning sunset flip out of the corner. The fans are way into Booker which is a good sign. It means HHH has someone to beat at Wrestlemania for no other reason than HHH wants to win at Wrestlemania. Back to Christian who takes Booker down so Jericho can hit a top rope knee drop.
A spinebuster takes Jericho down and it’s off to Goldust. He cleans the lower level of the house, hitting a middle rope bulldog for two on Jericho. Trish comes in with a cross body to Jericho and Goldust kisses Victoria. Booker and Christian take each other out and Jericho takes Trish down and finishes her with the Walls of Jericho.
Rating: D+. This started off as ok but boring and evolved into a messy comedy (I think?) match. There was nothing of note going on here which is the problem with Raw at this point: it isn’t terrible but there’s no interest in it at all. The tag titles meant nothing at all at this point and wouldn’t for a very long time. Thankfully we had the Smackdow tag titles established last night and they tore the house down for a long time.
Booker saves Jericho post match.
Terri is at Kane’s door and we cut to HHH who says roll the footage. I’m sure you’ve at least heard of this before. It’s of a funeral home with a date of 1992. Kane (clearly HHH in a Kane mask and t-shirt that wouldn’t be released for another 9 years) comes up to the casket and talks to the dead “body” of Katie Vick. It’s a mannequin if that’s not coming through. Kane (it’s HHH the entire segment so don’t get confused. I know this segment can make you stupid but hang with me here) says that if Katie had let him touch her in the car, this wouldn’t have happened.
The idea is that Kane was driving and crashed, killing Katie. Katie “talks” to Kane, saying that apparently now that she’s dead she wants Kane. Kane talks about getting excited watching Katie cheerlead and he fondles her chest which is mosaiced. This is supposed to be something like a hidden video of a sex tape. Kane takes his shirt off and starts undressing the mannequin. He takes off her underwear and says he loves the smell of formaldehyde in the morning. Kane takes his jeans off and gets in the casket. Sounds are heard and we cut to shots of candles and flowers.
Usually I would give a long winded explanation of how awful this is for wrestling and how terrible it is, but I think the segment speaks for itself: it’s simulated necrophilia. I think that sums it up. When you look at the unemployment figures in this country, remember that someone came up with this idea and was paid to do so.
Al Snow vs. Tommy Dreamer
Singapore Cane match. We start with a cane duel and Snow gets in the first connecting shots to the legs. Out to the floor and Dreamer fires away more cane shots but Snow headbutts him down. Back in and Dreamer kicks Al low, followed by a missed cane shot from an interfering Nowitski to give Dreamer the pin. Nothing to see here.
Big Show vs. Rosey/Jamal/Rico
The big guys jump Show to start but he shoves all of them away with ease. The heavies are clotheslined to the floor and Show goes after Rico’s sideburns of doom. JR makes gay references about Rico and Show destroys more people. There’s a chokeslam to Jamal (Umaga) for the pin. Total squash for Show.
Post break Eric announces that Big Show has been traded to Smackdown. He would get the world title the next month over there. After Show leaves, Hurricane arrives (did he leave?) and stands in front of his own car. Ok then.
We get some clips of Shawn getting destroyed after his match with HHH at Summerslam. Shawn is in a wheelchair at The World (WWF New York) and says his rehab is going slowly. The final match he had with HHH can stand on its own merit as not only a great match but a tribute to God. HHH did indeed put him in a wheelchair like he said he would but Shawn vows vengeance and stands up. He’s coming for HHH again.
HHH/Ric Flair vs. Rob Van Dam/Kane
The good guys pound away on their respective feud partners (Van Dam beat Flair last night) in the corner and both heels get kicked in the face. Van Dam and Flair start and it’s the cartwheel moonsault to Naitch. A middle rope kick to the face puts him down again as HHH knocks Kane off the apron and it’s the barricade. Van Dan kicks the Game down but Flair breaks up the Five Star.
Van Dam gets sent into the post and seems to have hut his ankle. That gets two back inside as we’re finally into a normal tag team match. JR and King debate necrophilia, which isn’t something I expected I’d have to write. Off to Flair as JR is sounding ticked off. Flair and Van Dam slug it out but it’s off to HHH with the knee to the face. King tries to convince JR that necrophilia is funny but Captain Oklahoma isn’t convinced. HHH puts on the sleeper and Van Dam is in trouble.
The hold is broken and it’s off to Flair. Van Dam superkicks him down and Flair goes up and with JR verbally rolling his eyes, Flair gets slammed down. HHH comes in and beats on Van Dam, but Rob escapes and tags Kane. Never mind as the tag isn’t seen so it’s time to go back to the not interesting match.
Back in and Van Dam takes Flair down and makes the real tag. Kane cleans house as the announcers debate if necrophiliac and Hulkamaniac rhyme. This is what Raw has sunk to people. Van Dam goes up and gets crotched as Kane and HHH fight on the floor. They head up the ramp with HHH being rammed into the set. Van Dam kicks Flair in the face, hits Rolling Thunder and adds the Five Star for the pin.
Rating: C-. Not only was the match not that good, but it was based on necrophilia. I can’t emphasize that enough: this feud is continuing because HHH dressed up like Kane and pretended to have sex with a mannequin representing a corpse. JR sounded legitimately angry in this match and can you blame him at all?
In the back Kane destroys HHH in the back and throws him into various metal objects. Hurricane is standing next to his car with the trunk open. HHH tries a Pedigree but gets catapulted onto the hood of the car. There’s a chokeslam onto the hood and Kane throws HHH into the trunk and slams it shut. Kane sends Hurricane away and says to the trunk, and I quote, “Now I’m going to screw you. The only question is will you still be alive, or will I just wait until you’re dead.” Kane drives away with HHH in the trunk to end the show.
Overall Rating: D. Ignoring the white elephant on this show, it wasn’t a good episode. There weren’t any good matches and a lot of the stuff felt like it was there to fill in two hours. The Elimination Chamber was mentioned but after the announcement it was barely mentioned again. This show was based around one of the stupidest stories of all time and it’s even worse than it seemed at the time. It’s in poor taste, it’s not funny, and it makes you embarrassed to be a wrestling fan. Terrible show.
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Smackdown – October 18, 2013: Action Over Storytelling
Smackdown Date: October 18, 2013
Location: Spring Center, Kansas City, Missouri
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield
We’re practically at a standstill here with the Cell PPV a little over a week away. Orton is still feuding with Bryan, Big Show is still a vigilante and no one cares about the Bellas as the new saviors of the Divas. However Goldust and Cody Rhodes are the new tag team champions after a great match on Monday night. We need to get to the PPV already to get us on to anything new. Let’s get to it.
We open with a recap of the main event from Raw with Big Show costing Shield the titles.
Theme song.
After the theme song we open with Brad Maddox and Vickie Guerrero in the ring. Vickie screeches about running a tight ship here on Smackdown and guarantees that Big Show will not be causing havoc here tonight. There will be order and discipline and Brad is here to assist her in achieving those goals. Brad says he’ll be keeping Big Show out of here tonight and Vickie praises the regime for their guidance. Cue Daniel Bryan who says he’s glad these two are doing what’s best for business.
What’s best for business though is Bryan beating Randy Orton inside the Cell with guest referee Shawn Michaels. As for tonight however, there’s a rumor that a 7’0 monster has gotten through security and here he is. Actually it’s just Big Show’s music and there is no giant. Bryan says he’s just messing with the two of them, drawing a laugh from the crowd. Big Show isn’t here yet but Cody Rhodes and Goldust are. Vickie yells about wanting discipline and makes Bryan/Cody/Goldust vs. Shield for tonight before cackling a lot.
Wyatt Family vs. The Miz/Kofi Kingston
Miz jumps Rowan to start and hits a quick corner clothesline to knock him into the corner. Off to Kofi to attack the arm before Harper comes in and sends Kingston into the corner. A quick cross body gets two on Luke but he dives into a big boot for two. Back to Rowan for a slam before Harper comes in for a chinlock. Kofi avoids a charge in the corner and goes to tag Miz, only to have Erick pull him off the apron. Harper sneaks in and takes Kofi’s head off with the discus lariat for the pin at 4:05.
Rating: D+. No time to go anywhere here but it furthers the Miz vs. Wyatt feud. With Bray on the shelf we’re going to have to build it up on promos but luckily that’s where Bray shines more than anything else. Kofi was his usual jobbing self here but he never loses any popularity. It’s also good to see the Wyatts get a win to make up for their loss last week.
Post match the Wyatts circle Kofi but Bray calls them off. It’s ok that Miz is afraid because Bray is the hammer that everyone fears. Miz should enjoy his world as long as he can because the Wyatts are going to take it all away.
Brie Bella vs. AJ Lee
Brie has a banged up shoulder. AJ immediately bails to the floor a few times but Tamina blocks Brie from going after her. Tamina finally moves and Brie gets in a right hand before sending it back inside. AJ absorbs everything Brie throws at her and snaps the bad arm over the top rope to take over. Off to an armbar as Brie screams a lot. Brie’s arm is wrapped around the middle rope and it’s already back to another armbar. The twin comes back with an elbow in the corner and a middle rope missile dropkick for two. Nikki throws Tamina into the steps, allowing Brie to grab a TERRIBLE looking Bella Buster for the pin at 3:55.
Rating: D. If this is supposed to make me sympathize with or care about the Bellas, it’s not quite working. I have a hard time caring about two beautiful women on a reality show who happen to be sleeping with two of the three top guys in the company. The whole feud started because AJ said she was a wrestler and Brie is a reality TV personality but we’re supposed to like the reality TV star on the wrestling show. Yet WWE is surprised it’s not working.
Lillian is introducing a match when Big Show comes through the crowd. He gets in the ring and holds up a ticket given to him by Daniel Bryan. Big Show thanks the fans for all the support he’s given to him through social media and it seems the fans want Big Show to get his job back. He holds up his fist but here are the GM’s (Hanzel and Gretel according to Show) to try to throw him out. Brad says Show has nothing to lose which Show says is the worst thing you can say. There’s the KO punch and Show leaves through the crowd.
CM Punk vs. Big E. Langston
Langston easily breaks Punk’s grip and pounds him down before running Punk over with a shoulder block. A big knee lift puts Punk down again but CM fights up and slugs away at Langston before low bridging him out to the floor. Punk’s slingshot plancha is caught in midair and Punk is rammed back first into the post as we go to a break. Back with Langston caught in a half crab but powering out, only to have his hurricanrana caught in another half crab.
Langston lets him go but a Warrior splash only hits knees. Punk comes back with the leg lariat to the face but the swinging neckbreaker is countered. Langston misses a charge into the post and falls out to the floor, setting up a nice suicide dive from Punk. Back in and a high cross body gets a close two. The fans are liking this. The top rope elbow gets another two count but Langston escapes the GTS and runs Punk over. Warrior Splash gets two but Punk slips out of the Big Ending and it’s high kick/GTS for the pin at 7:38 shown of 11:08.
Rating: B-. Fun match here with Punk playing a good David to Langston’s Goliath. I’m a fan of Big E. and it’s annoying to see him fall through the cracks like he has in the last few months. He’s more than capable of talking and his look is enough to keep him around for years. Good match here.
Post match here are Heyman and company to congratulate Punk on his win over a marginally talented rookie. However Punk has to face a professional inside the Cell and he wants no part of that man. Punk says that makes Heyman an idiot rather than the best in the world. There are two words that Heyman needs to focus on.
The first is Cell, as in what they’re going to be locked inside of. The second word is Hell, which is what Heyman and Ryback are going to go through. Heyman quotes AC/DC and threatens to come explain what he means personally. The Heyman guys head to the ring to beat down Punk but Langston makes the save. Looks like a face turn which could be intriguing.
After a break Del Rio is in the ring waving a Mexican flag. Josh introduces us to the Cena video from Raw. Alberto says that he was waving that flag because he’s the champion of Mexico. Unlike himself, the people here have no passion or soul at all. John Cena is the ultimate gringo representing these people and Del Rio can’t stand him.
Who does Cena think he is by coming back and being handed a world title shot? Cena has only been gone two months but his ego keeps growing day by day. After he loses to Del Rio, he’ll be just like all these people: a nobody. Josh gets put in the armbreaker as an example of what’s happening at the PPV.
We recap Big Show knocking out Maddox. Brad sold the heck out of that punch.
Real Americans vs. Usos
Colter is on commentary. Cesaro gets elbowed down by Jimmy to start as Colter rants about Los Matadores. Off to Swagger to run over Jimmy in the corner and Colter is blaming the government shutdown for the arrival of Los Matadores. Cesaro does a remarkable 27 rotation giant swing to Jimmy to one of the biggest reactions of the night.
Back to Swagger for some stomping and a double chickenwing. Colter wants to know what kind of people kidnap a little person and make them dress like a bull. Maybe they owe child support and have been passing bad checks. Cue Los Matadores so Torito can gore Colter a few times. Jey comes back with a NASTY looking superkick to set up the Superfly Splash on Swagger for the pin at 5:45.
Rating: D. This was a squash with a screwy ending. It’s very annoying to see Cesaro get more and more over because of a great display of physical strength, only to be used to put over a worthless tag team like Los Matadores. The Usos need to get the tag titles eventually and there’s a chance they can take them from the Rhodes Brothers, perhaps in a three way match.
Swagger gets beaten up post match.
Raw ReBound shows Shawn and Orton’s showdown.
Shield vs. Daniel Bryan/Cody Rhodes/Goldust
Orton comes out after Bryan and says that Bryan can’t beat him and that he’s in way over his head. Goldust and Reigns get things going with the power man taking Goldie into the corner and the fast Shield tags start. Rollins stomps Goldust down and it’s quickly back to Roman who gets caught in a Russian legsweep. A kick to the side of Roman’s head is good for two and it’s off to Cody for a springboard missile dropkick.
Rhodes gets caught in the wrong corner as well with Roman sending him into the post as we go to a break. Back with Ambrose raking Cody’s eyes on the top rope before it’s back to Rollins for a modified chinlock. Reigns comes back in for a splash and a chinlock of his own before elbowing Cody down for two. Back to Rollins for some kicks to the back before Roman comes in again for a standing chinlock. There’s a distinct lack of Ambrose int his match so far.
Cody sidesteps a charging Roman and sends him out to the floor. Back in and a dropkick puts Roman down again but Rollins dropkicks Goldust off the apron. Seth gets kneed in the face for his troubles and it’s a double tag off to Ambrose vs. Bryan. Daniel responds to the YES chants and hits all his favorites including the moonsault out of the corner, the corner dropkick and the kick to the head. Everything breaks down and a Disaster Kick drops Rollins.
Ambrose and Bryan hit double clotheslines but Reigns’ spear hits the steps instead of Goldust. A running knee to Dean’s ribs puts him down but Bryan can’t launch the headbutt. Dean gets two off a butterfly superplex as Cody makes a save. Cody loads up a sunset flip from the apron but Rollins counters into a powerbomb throw onto Goldust onto the announce table. Back in and Bryan almost gets the YES Lock but has to go after Rollins. The FLYING GOAT takes out Seth and Dean and the running knee is enough to pin Ambrose at 9:48 shown of 13:18.
Rating: B. This took time to get going but the last five minutes or so were such complete insanity that it’s hard not to love. They kind of booked themselves into a corner here though as you can’t have the tag champions lose four days after getting the belts and you can’t have Bryan lose this close to a world title match so Shield had to go down. Still though, fun stuff.
Overall Rating: B-. This is what Smackdown needs to be: focused more on action than the storytelling. The main event as well as Punk vs. Langston were good matches and the rest of the matches other than the Divas weren’t terrible. I liked this so much better than Raw as we didn’t waste time on recapping everything and actually did stuff. Nice show tonight.
Results
Wyatt Family b. Kofi Kingston/The Miz – Discus lariat to Kingston
Brie Bella b. AJ Lee – Bella Buster
CM Punk b. Big E. Langston – GTS
Usos b. Real Americans – Superfly Splash to Swagger
Daniel Bryan/Cody Rhodes/Goldust b. Shield – Running knee to Ambrose
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume I at Amazon for just $4 at:
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