Wrestlemania XXXVII Night Two: Feelings

Wrestlemania XXXVII Night Two
Date: April 11, 2021
Location: Raymond James Stadium, Tampa, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Samoa Joe, Byron Saxton
America the Beautiful: Ashland Craft

It’s time for the second half of the show and hopefully it is just as good if not better than last night. This time we have the main event of Roman Reigns defending the Universal Title against Daniel Bryan and Edge, along with four more title matches. That should make this feel more like a complete Wrestlemania, though I’m still not sure on whether I like one or two nights better. Let’s get to it.

Here is Night One if you need a recap.

America the Beautiful, with the roster on the stage.

We get the same opening video from last night, again with the Captain Jack Sparrow impersonator though with some fresh visuals.

Here are Titus O’Neil and Hulk Hogan to get things going….and they’re in pirate costumes. They make pirate jokes and the fans do not seem overly interested as we are thrown to our first match.

Randy Orton vs. The Fiend

Fiend has been tormenting Orton so Orton burned him alive. Now the charred remains of the Fiend are back for revenge. Orton is in white gear in a look I don’t remember seeing before. We see Fiend walking through the hall backstage and he transforms from the burned version into the regular one. Before Fiend appears, here’s Alexa Bliss with a huge jack in the box on the floor (it goes above the top rope). She turns the crank and the Fiend pops out of the box like the boss in a fairly creative game.

Fiend jumps off of the box and clotheslines Orton down as the red lights are back. A release Rock Bottom plants Orton and Fiend shouts what sounds like YOWIE WOWIE. Fiend loads up his own Punt but Orton bails out to the floor. That’s fine with Fiend, who follows him out with the Mandible Claw. Orton rolls inside for the break and there’s the hanging DDT to drop Fiend for all of two seconds.

The RKO is countered so Orton sends him into the side of the box (“box like structure” according to Cole) and there’s another DDT. Fiend is back up with the crossbody and right hands so Orton sends him outside again. That means a third DDT and this time Fiend stays down for a bit. The RKO is countered into the Mandible Claw and Sister Abigail is loaded up….but fire comes out of the posts. Bliss is sitting on top of the box with the black goo all over her. Fiend is distracted enough that the RKO can finish him at 5:54.

Rating: D. And I thought the bugs on the mat were never going to be topped. The Fiend gets to lose to Orton again in another idea that probably sounded great on paper but since this company doesn’t get that there is more to it than that, this is what we get. I don’t know if they’re going with the beauty killed the beast idea or something like that, but good grief man. Is it asking too much for Fiend to be able to get a bit win without doing something stupid? Awful stuff again, and hopefully they get it out of the way here.

Post match Fiend stares at Bliss and the lights go out. When they come back up, both of them are gone.

Bayley comes up to Hulk Hogan, Titus O’Neil and Eric Bischoff as they talk about Sasha Banks and Bianca Belair. She offers Bischoff a spot on her show but Bischoff would rather have Belair on. Hogan and Bischoff leave to talk about Hogan’s new boat, though Titus does give Bayley his pirate hat.

Women’s Tag Team Titles: Natalya/Tamina vs. Nia Jax/Shayna Baszler

Natalya/Tamina are defending after winning Tag Team Turmoil last night. Natalya and Shayna go to the mat to start and it’s an early standoff. Nia comes in and wants Tamina, who gets what I hope are ironic cheers. Tamina’s headbutt sets up an unsuccessful slam attempt so it’s back to Natalya to take Shayna down. A catapult sends Shayna into a superkick from Tamina for two.

Shayna is back up with a knee to Natalya’s face as Jax beats up Tamina on the floor. It’s time to start in on Natalya’s leg, including a nasty stomp to twist the ankle around. Nia comes in to stay on the knee and we get some of the trademark Natalya screaming. A missed charge sends Nia shoulder first into the post but she is back up with a spinebuster with Tamina having to make the save.

The hot tag brings in Tamina (which they miss on the first try because they can’t even SLAP HANDS properly) and the pace picks up. Tamina blocks the Kirifuda Clutch is straight power and Samoan drops Shayna for two. Shayna catches Tamina on top but Natalya breaks up a super Samoan drop from Nia. That sets up a double high crossbody to give Nia two, though she seems to bang up her knee in the process.

Nia shouts at Tamina a lot so Tamina backhands her in the face. A slam (with less rotation than Lex Luger got on Yokozuna) plants (kind of) Jax for two and we get a TAMINA chant because wresting fans are annoying. The Superfly Splash misses and it’s Natalya and Shayna coming back in, with Natalya dropkicking Shayna first. The Sharpshooter has Nia in trouble but Baszler grabs the Kirifuda Clutch on Natalya to retain at 14:21.

Rating: D. What does it say that I’m relieved Nia Jax is still a champion? This went WAY too long as WWE will not give up on the idea of Tamina and Natalya being something. The match was completely uninteresting because of who was in there and it isn’t like the action was very good either. Awful match, as WWE continues to not have the first clue of how to use these titles.

We recap Kevin Owens vs. Sami Zayn. Sami has been going a little bit nuts because he is convinced that there is a huge conspiracy against him. Owens does not seem to buy it but Zayn has even brought in YouTube sensation Logan Paul, who doesn’t quite seem to buy Sami’s conspiracy theory. Paul is here tonight in an undefined role.

Sami Zayn vs. Kevin Owens

It’s pretty awesome that these two are getting to face each other at Wrestlemania. Sami comes out first and introduces Paul, who does not seem that popular. Owens plants him with a Pop Up Powerbomb at the bell so Sami rolls outside. That means Sami has to grab the ropes to avoid an apron powerbomb. Sami gets dropped ribs first across the top rope and there’s the Cannonball to crush him again.

The threat of Owens going to the top sends Sami outside again but this time he catches Owens with a brainbuster on the apron for a big reaction (egads). Back in and the Michinoku Driver (Cole calls it a Blue Thunder Bomb, but Graves “saves him from the internet” by correcting him. Cole: “Thanks Corey. I got enough of that last night.”) gives Sami two so he puts Owens on top.

Some headbutts send Sami flying and the frog splash gives Owens two of his own. A fisherman’s buster onto the knee knocks Zayn silly for two more but ht he’s right back with the exploder suplex into the corner. The Helluva Kick and Stunner both miss so Sami grabs the Blue Thunder Bomb for two. Another exploder sets up a nasty half and half suplex to rock Owens and the brainbuster gets another near fall.

Sami takes him up again and gets countered into the swinging fisherman’s superplex to crush Zayn and have Paul slumped over in his chair. Back up and Sami hits the Helluva Kick but makes the mistake of trying another one, allowing Owens to hit a superkick. Another superkick sets up the Stunner to pin Zayn at 9:17.

Rating: B-. A lot of what made this work was just seeing Owens vs. Zayn at Wrestlemania. These two have one of the deepest histories in modern wrestling and it must be so special to them to get to do this. Good match too, with Owens getting a win like he deserves after having such a great series with Reigns. Also, thanks for getting the show on track after the awful first hour.

Post match Paul checks on Sami as he gets up so Sami yells a lot and reminds Paul that Owens is the enemy. Paul shoves him down and storms off so Paul raises Owens’ hand. The Stunner leaves him laying so Owens can hug his family. Paul is helped out and asks why Owens did that.

Riddle runs into Great Khali and congratulates him on the Hall of Fame. He thinks Khali should open a store for giant sized people and sell giant toilets and scooters. There seems to be a communication issue so Rob Van Dam comes in to act as a translator. Van Dam says Khali says they need to dominate the market share with good marketing ideas, so Van Dam recommends his brand of rolling papers (to a big pop).

US Title: Sheamus vs. Riddle

Riddle is defending after Sheamus attacked him with Riddle’s own scooter a few weeks back. One day someone is going to have to explain the birds on Riddle’s entrance. Sheamus takes him down with a headlock takeover to start and stomps away but Riddle is back up with a choke on Sheamus’ back. That’s broken up and the swinging Rock Bottom plants Riddle again.

The Irish Curse connects but Riddle is back up with some shots to the face. Sheamus knocks him back and goes up so Riddle catches him with a top rope flipping belly to belly superplex. Some running forearms set up the exploder into the Broton into the Jackhammer for two (he can’t let the Goldberg stuff go) on Sheamus and Riddle is stunned. The Bro Derek is broken up and Sheamus sends him to the apron. Riddle flips back in for a knee to the face (looked like it was supposed to be the Brogue Kick, as Cole called it) for two.

An Alabama Slam gets two on Riddle, who is right back up with a suplex to the floor. The Floating Bro drops Sheamus again and they head back inside. Another Floating Bro gets two but Sheamus knocks him back again. Sheamus goes up top so Riddle follows him, only to have Sheamus load up a super White Noise.

That’s a bit too much though as they slip off, leaving Sheamus to hit the regular White Noise. Sheamus adds a top rope knee for two (proving that Riddle is tougher than Bruno Sammartino) so Riddle tries another springboard flip, which is Brogue Kicked out of the air (in some great timing) to give Sheamus the pin and the title at 10:49.

Rating: B-. These guys beat the heck out of each other, though some of the spots didn’t quite connect as planned. The ending made up for a lot of that though and while I’m not wild on Riddle’s short reign, Sheamus absolutely deserves something after his great run run with Drew McIntyre. Solid midcard match between two hard hitting guys, though I’m not sure where Riddle goes from here. Sheamus isn’t likely a long term champion, but him putting someone over will be a good moment.

HHH gives Bad Bunny a golden microphone to start his world tour.

We recap Big E. vs. Apollo Crews for the Intercontinental Title. Big E. won the title on Christmas night and defeated Crews to retain it. Crews thinks there have been shenanigans so he attacked Big E. Then Crews embraced his Nigerian roots and gained an accent, a scarf and a spear. Then Big E. beat Crews to retain it so Crews thought there had been shenanigans so he attacked Big E. Now it’s a Nigerian Drum Fight, which seems to be another hardcore match, in Big E.’s hometown.

Intercontinental Title: Big E. vs. Apollo Crews

Big E. is defending in a Nigerian Drum Fight, meaning anything goes and you can only win by pin or submission. Wale performs Big E.’s entrance live for a bonus. Big E. looks rather emotional and has a Feeding Tampa Bay (charity) logo on his entrance gear. Commentary explains that this has nothing to do with percussion instruments, but rather beating your opponent like a drum, though there is a gong at ringside.

There are also various weapons, including some kendo sticks, with both of them grabbing one to beat on the other. Big E. gets the better of it and they head outside, where there are indeed drums. A superkicks gets Crews a breather and he sends Big E. into the gong. Back in and Big E. spears Crews through the ropes to the floor and it’s time to pick some new weapons. Crews knocks him down and puts Big E. onto the steps. He picks up the other half and goes to the apron to crush Big E. but only hits steps.

Big E. is back up with a release Rock Bottom off the apron and onto the steps for a rather disturbing thud. A table is set up but it takes a bit too long, allowing Crews to hammer away with a kendo stick. The frog splash through the table only hits table though, allowing Big E. to nail the Big Ending. Cue a giant (Dabba Kato of Raw Underground fame) in something like a military uniform to beat Big E. down though, including a chokeslam. The giant puts Crews on top for the pin and the title at 6:50.

Rating: C+. They beat each other up well enough here and the title change was a nice moment, but Big E. being the latest star to have the big moment in his hometown is rather depressing. I’m not sure what WWE’s obsession with that is but it gets a little tiring. Also, for those keeping track, this is the second night in a row where a member of New Day has lost a title in the fourth match of the show thanks to a giant hitting something like a chokeslam.

Video on the first night of Wrestlemania.

Hall of Fame ceremony video.

The Hall of Fame class is presented:

Molly Holly

Great Khali

Ozzy Osbourne (not here)

Eric Bischoff

Rob Van Dam

Rich Hering (Warrior Award)

Kane (gets the headliner entrance)

We recap Asuka vs. Rhea Ripley for the Raw Women’s Title. Asuka has been champion for most of the last year and Ripley debuted to challenge her. Not much more to it than that and it really doesn’t need to.

Raw Women’s Title: Rhea Ripley vs. Asuka

Ripley is challenging and gets played to the ring live by Ash Costello. Asuka starts fast by kicking her into the corner and then counters a charge into a drop toehold into the middle buckle. That’s enough to send Ripley outside for a breather so Asuka follows her out with a knee to the face. Back in and Asuka kicks Ripley in the back as it seems Ripley is a bit shaken up by the pressure to start.

Ripley gets in her own kick and a belly to back faceplant gets two. The fans are split here as Ripley grabs a bodyscissors and shouts about how much she wants this. That’s broken up and Ripley slows the pace for some hard clotheslines. Asuka counters a kick to the chest into a kneebar so Ripley goes with the power to muscle up into a German suplex. Some shoulders in the corner stay on Asuka’s back and Ripley takes her up top.

That can’t go well so Asuka knocks her down and nails a good missile dropkick. Asuka’s German suplex sets up the rapid fire strikes, capped off by the big kick to the head for two. Asuka goes up again but this time Ripley dropkicks her down, setting up a face first drop onto the apron (which thankfully doesn’t smudge Asuka’s eye makeup). They fight to the apron and Asuka grabs a DDT to the floor (GEEZ) with Ripley thudding hard. That gets seven, because dropping four feet from the apron to the floor and landing on your head isn’t worth an eight these days.

Back in and Asuka fires off the Kawada kicks but the sliding knee is countered into some stomps to the head. The Prism Trap is countered into an armbar but Ripley swings her into the corner for the break. A bottom rope superplex (you don’t see that every day) gets two on Asuka so she tries the Asuka Lock. That’s broken up so she misses Ripley’s head, allowing the Riptide to give Ripley the pin and the title at 14:15.

Rating: B-. Perfectly fine match, but there was no story coming in and the ending did kind of come out of nowhere. What matters here though is they got the winner right as Asuka has done just about everything she can with the title. Also, it was kind of nice to not have it be Charlotte giving Asuka a major loss for a change. Good match here, though not exactly a break the door down debut for Ripley.

We recap Fiend beating Randy Orton. That might not be the right thing to recap.

Here are Hulk Hogan and Titus O’Neil to thank the fans and everyone who made this possible but Bayley interrupts. She demands her thank you and pyro because she has been carrying this show on her back for the last two nights…..and here are the Bellas to interrupt. Bayley: “I don’t know what you heard, but John Cena is not here tonight!” Nikki slaps her and Brie gives her a facebuster as the fans are not pleased. Hulk and Titus dance with the Bellas to wrap it up.

Here’s what’s coming to Peacock, with the main focus on the Ruthless Aggression series.

We recap the main event of Roman Reigns defending the Universal Title against Edge and Daniel Bryan. Edge won the Royal Rumble after returning from another long term injury, but wasn’t happy that Daniel Bryan is complaining about not getting his own shot. Bryan won the Elimination Chamber and then had to face Reigns immediately, with Reigns winning in less than two minutes. Bryan wanted another shot and had Reigns tapping at Fastlane but guest referee Edge cost him the match after accidentally getting knocked down. Therefore, it’s a triple threat for the title.

Universal Title: Roman Reigns vs. Edge vs. Daniel Bryan

Reigns is defending and Edge gets a monster pop. Paul Heyman and Jey Uso, with the lei’s, are here with Reigns. We’re ready to go after the Big Match Intros and Reigns decks Bryan at the bell. Edge hammers on Reigns but Bryan is back up, only to be thrown outside. Uso drops Bryan on the floor and then does the same to Edge, leaving Reigns as the only one up. Reigns loads up the announcers’ table but Bryan is back up with the suicide dive.

Uso is right there to take both of them down though, earning himself a whip into the steps from Edge. Reigns gets posted too and Edge is the only one left standing. The Edgecution plants Uso on the steps and medics come in to take him out. That leaves Bryan to hurricanrana Edge off the top but Edge rolls him up for two. Reigns is back up on the apron so Bryan slides between his legs to pull him back to the floor.

Bryan’s missile dropkick hits Edge and he nips up but Reigns counters the suicide dive into an overhead belly to belly. Back in and Edge counters the Superman Punch into the Edgecution but loads up the spear instead f covering. The spear is cut off with a Superman Punch so Reigns loads up his own spear. That’s countered into a sunset flip for two, leaving them to both try spears at the same time and collide.

Bryan comes back in with a Swan Dive each with Reign having to kick out. Edge is knocked outside, leaving Bryan to stomp on Reigns’ head over and over. The YES Lock goes on (and Heyman’s eyes pop up) until Edge makes a save to give us a quick breather. Bryan YES Locks Edge with Reigns making a save this time, setting up a powerbomb to drive Bryan into Edge. Reigns isn’t done though as he takes Bryan outside for a powerbomb off the steps and through the announcers’ table, allowing Edge to spear Reigns off the steps for the three way knockdown.

Edge is up first and grabs a chair to knock Reigns down again. The Crossface, complete with a piece of the chair in Reigns’ mouth, has Reigns in trouble inside but Bryan comes in with a YES Lock to Reigns at the same time. Bryan and Edge headbutt the heck out of each other for the break so Bryan stomps on Edge’s head too. The running knee is countered by Edge’s spear though and another spear gets two on Reigns with Bryan having to pull the referee out.

Edge is incensed so he chairs Bryan in the back. The chair is taken inside so Edge can chair both of them over and over as the psycho eyes are back at full strength (he was always great at those). With both of them down, Edge loads up a pair of Conchairtos, because covering is a little too basic for him. The first Conchairto hits Bryan but Jey Uso is back in to save Reigns but Edge spears him down. Reigns spears Edge down and gives him a Conchairto for the double pin at 21:49.

Rating: A-. I really liked this and above all else, it came off as a Wrestlemania quality match and main event. I’m rather pleased with the ending as well, even if it seemed like the least likely result. You could feel all three as possible winners more than once and that is a great feeling to have. Awesome main event here and by far the best match of the two nights.

A lot of pyro and replays take us out.

Overall Rating: B-. The first hour really dragged this one down a lot but they did what they could to make up for it. The very good main event helped it a lot and allowed it to overcome a fairly weak middle of the show, but that first hour was the big problem. This one felt more like Wrestlemania than the first night, though the real version is somewhere between the two with some stuff cut out. It still isn’t a great Wrestlemania or even very close, but what we got was very good and I’ll take that after last year’s mostly forgotten show.

Overall Overall Rating: B. Two good halves make for a rather good weekend and it felt like WWE was back to normal, if only for two nights. I know it is time to go back to the Thunderdome (even the new one this time) but it was so nice to have things back to normal for a change. The wrestling was mostly (though not entirely) good and we had some memorable moments, though it is pretty clear that they need to fine tune the Wrestlemania formula again before Dallas. Still though, very enjoyable weekend and it made me smile about wrestling for the first time in a good while.

Results

Randy Orton b. The Fiend – RKO

Nia Jax/Shayna Baszler b. Tamina/Natalya – Kirifuda Clutch to Natalya

Kevin Owens b. Sami Zayn – Stunner

Sheamus b. Riddle – Brogue Kick

Apollo Crews b. Big E. – Chokeslam

Rhea Ripley b. Asuka – Riptide

Roman Reigns b. Daniel Bryan and Edge – Double pin

 

 

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ECW On Sci Fi – November 7, 2006 (2021 Redo): The Gorilla Fallout

ECW on Sci Fi
Date: November 7, 2006
Location:
Mark of the Quad, Moline, Illinois
Commentators: Tazz, Joey Styles

We’re coming up on December To Dismember and that means the Extreme Elimination Chamber is coming. You might consider this a warning, but we need to have some more participants set for the thing. I’m not sure what else we are going to have on the way there, but this place is in need of something fresh. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of last week’s main event with Paul Heyman dressing like a gorilla to attack Rob Van Dam from behind. Heyman can be a weird guy.

Opening sequence.

Extreme Elimination Chamber Qualifying Match: Mike Knox vs. CM Punk

Knox sends Kelly Kelly to the back to make him even more of a heel. They trade shots to the face in the corner to start with Punk kicking him in the head for two. Knox elbows him in the face though and starts stomping away until Punk ties him in the ropes for something close to the Anaconda Vice. The springboard clothesline sends Knox outside and an Oklahoma roll gives Punk two back inside. Knox knees him in the back for two and a backbreaker makes it worse.

We hear about these two being parts of Team Rated RKO and Team DX at Survivor Series as a backbreaker gives Knox two. Punk fights out of a chinlock so Knox powerbombs him down. That doesn’t last long though as Punk is back up with the series of forearms but another backbreaker gives Knox another two. Knox takes him up top but a superplex is broken up, allowing Punk to hit a high crossbody. The Anaconda Vice makes Knox tap.

Rating: C-. This was about all you could have expected, though I can’t imagine this is the end of the feud. Punk is a rising star and Knox could be any muscle headed numskull who is there to stand in his way. The Kelly Kelly factor still needs to be dealt with, but for now this was all it needed to be.

Elijah Burke and Sylvester Terkay are now in ECW. Well they certainly are new.

Here is Paul Heyman, with security and gorilla head, for a chat. He promises announcements tonight but first of all, we take a look at him attacking Rob Van Dam last week. That’s why tonight it’s Van Dam/Hardcore Holly vs. Big Show/Heyman himself. One more thing: we already have four participants in the Extreme Elimination Chamber and a fifth will be named tonight. Therefore, we’ll have the final name announced next week, and it can be anyone from Raw, Smackdown or ECW.

CM Punk will be on Ghost Hunters tonight.

Daivari vs. Little Guido

Great Khali is here with Daivari and Trinity is here with Guido. It’s a brawl to start with Daivari getting the better of things and ripping at Guido’s face on the ropes. A sunset flip doesn’t do much for Guido as Daivari sends him into the buckle for his efforts. Guido gets in a dropkick for two but it’s the hammerlock DDT to give Daivari the fast pin.

Post match Khali lays out Guido again.

Here’s what John Cena has done to promote the Marine.

Extreme Elimination Chamber Qualifying Match: Test vs. Tommy Dreamer

Test elbows him in the face in the corner to start but Dreamer is right back with the Cactus Clothesline. That earns Dreamer some rams into the post to keep him in trouble and we hit the chinlock with a knee in the back. Make it an armbar, followed by a chinlock as Test can’t make his mind up. Dreamer fights up and hits a neckbreaker but the DDT is blocked. The referee misses a low blow from Test and it’s a big boot into the TKO for the pin.

Rating: D+. Another match where there wasn’t a ton of drama coming in but that’s fine. Sometimes you need to just get the job done and that is what they did here. I know Dreamer is the ECW original but is anyone asking to see him in a big time title match? Test might not be much, but he’s higher on the food chain than Dreamer right now.

Rob Van Dam/Hardcore Holly vs. Big Show/Paul Heyman

Heyman is in a track suit and has the security with him. Van Dam goes for Heyman to start but gets knocked down by Show, who takes him into the corner. Heyman is bouncing up and down on the apron as Show hammers away on Van Dam. It’s too early to dive over for the hot tag as Show takes him down again and chokes away on the mat. The fans are actually chanting for Holly, which is about as bizarre as you can get.

Holly goes outside to scare security away from Van Dam, causing Heyman to panic and shout about keeping Holly back. A running clothesline drops Van Dam again and Show holds his arms back so Heyman can get in a few slaps. Van Dam tries slugging away and gets dropped with another clothesline. Show misses a charge though and gets caught with a spinwheel kick in the corner. Van Dam gets over for the tag….and Holly turns on Van Dam because of course he does. The referee throws it out as Holly chairs Van Dam down.

Rating: C. They weren’t really hiding what they were going for here as Holly didn’t do anything physical until the end of the match. The more I think about it, the more I think this might be a better move, as Punk is starting to move up the ladder and can be the second face on the show. I know Holly was getting cheered, but he is going to have a pretty firm ceiling above him no matter what. It might not be the best move in the short term, but it is in the long term.

The Alabama Slam onto the chair leaves Van Dam laying to end the show as Styles thinks Holly is working with Heyman to get into the Chamber.

Overall Rating: C. The wrestling wasn’t the point here, but rather the fact that they have something to build towards. It gives the show a much needed structure and narrative, which have been lacking for most of its run so far. I’m curious as to who is going to be the final entrant, but they could absolutely use another name from outside to build up the roster. Not a great show, but an encouraging one.

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ECW On Sci Fi – October 31, 2006 (2021 Redo): Mediocre Halloween Everyone

ECW on Sci Fi
Date: October 31, 2006
Location: Bradley Center, Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

It’s a holiday show and I’m not sure what that means. We are just over a month away from December To Dismember and the big story at the moment is Rob Van Dam beating Big Show for the second time in a row to guarantee an ECW Title shot. It is not clear when that match is taking place but we might find that out this week. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Rob Van Dam beating Big Show in a ladder match last week to become #1 contender for good.

Paul Heyman, in a rather bright suit, announces that Van Dam has chosen to have his title shot at December To Dismember. That’s fine with Heyman, but he has one more ruling to make: Van Dam and Big Show will be two of six entrants in the first ever EXTREME Elimination Chamber.

Elimination Chamber Qualifying Match: Kevin Thorn vs. Sabu

Ariel is here with Thorn, who is knocked outside in a hurry for the slingshot flip dive. Back in and Sabu’s springboard is countered into a sitout spinebuster (that looked good) for two. Thorn takes him down into an armbar for a bit, or at least until Sabu fights up for a springboard elbow. A springboard clothesline has Thorn in trouble but he clotheslines Sabu out of the air. Back up and Sabu nails a springboard tornado DDT, setting up the slingshot flipping Fameasser. The camel clutch makes Thorn tap.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t the biggest surprise in the world and that is ok in this case. Sabu is still one of the biggest stars in ECW so it makes sense to have him beat up a low level guy like Thorn. It isn’t like Thorn was going to go very far as a vampire in the first place so let him use whatever he has left to put others over instead.

Sandman wants your vote to face Umaga at Cyber Sunday and beats up a well placed clown.

Video on the animals near the set in the Marine.

Tazz gives Joey…..a noose. Ignore the guy in the gorilla suit behind them.

Here are the debuting Daivari and Great Khali and after a lot of ranting in whatever language Daivari speaks, it’s time for a debut.

Shannon Moore vs. Daivari

Moore is distracted by Khali (who was staring him down) and Daivari starts in on the arm. That’s broken up and Moore hits a few shots to the face, only to get caught in a hammerlock DDT for the fast pin.

Khali lays Moore out post match. This is a good move as ECW has been dying for both fresh blood and new main event stars. It’s like they’re trying to improve!

Rob Van Dam isn’t surprised that Paul Heyman is trying a trick, but he is probably going to be pretty good inside an Extreme Elimination Chamber. Hardcore Holly interrupts and blames Van Dam’s extreme style for his injury. They’re partners tonight and this time around, Holly has his back.

And now, a Diva Halloween costume contest. There are three women, all of whom get to disrobe. Trinity has the bottom half of a swimsuit and caution tape around the top. Ariel is in pretty much her usual attire and even Justin Roberts calls her out on it. Kelly Kelly is dressed as Punk, complete with the taped up fists, tattoos (including the Pepsi logo) and STRAIGHT EDGE written on her stomach. Believe it or not, Trinity wins with ease. Cue Mike Knox to yell at Kelly but the real CM Punk makes the save.

Post break, Knox challenges Punk for next week.

Rob Van Dam/Hardcore Holly vs. Big Show/Test

Holly and Test start, though the fans cheer for and receive Van Dam. Some elbows to the face have Rob in trouble but he’s right back out of the corner with a spinning high crossbody. Granted that doesn’t mean much when Test pulls him out of the air, but he does manage to escape and hand it off to Holly. This time it’s Test getting beaten down, allowing Van Dam to come back in for a legdrop in the corner.

Test is back up to send Van Dam into Show’s boot but Rob kicks him out to the floor. A running crossbody over the top knocks Holly to the floor and we take a break. Back with Test elbowing away in the corner and choking Rob with his boot. Rob comes back with a spinning kick to the face but it’s off to Show to blast Holly with a clothesline. Holly’s chops are cut off with a superkick and Test sends him shoulder first into the post.

Show comes back in but misses the Vader Bomb, allowing Rob to come back in. A shot to the knee lets Rob hit a top rope flip attack, followed by Rolling Thunder. Everything breaks down and the referee gets bumped as Holly hits the spinning Alabama Slam on Test. Show runs Holly over but Rob is up with the top rope kick to the face. Rob follows him to the floor….but the gorilla from earlier hits Van Dam with a pipe. The chokeslam finishes Van Dam.

Rating: C+. Not too bad here as Test continues to be the surprise of ECW. He isn’t lighting the world on fire but he is perfectly fine in the monster role and that’s all he needs to be. It’s also not the best sign for Holly’s future that he still hasn’t won anything since his injury, but I can see why pushing Holly might not be the most popular idea in the world.

It’s Heyman in the gorilla suit.

Overall Rating: C. Pretty fast show here but the best thing is bringing in another big star. I know Khali might not be everyone’s favorite, but this show has been dying for another main event name. Hopefully the move breathes some life into the place, though Khali does have a pretty firm ceiling above him. Just having a target like December To Dismember should help a lot, though I have no idea what they are going to be able to put on the card with six names in one match.

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Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania XXIII (2015 Redo): It’s Cena’s World

Wrestlemania XXIII
Date: April 1, 2007
Location: Ford Field, Detroit, Michigan
Attendance: 80,103
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz, John Bradshaw Layfield, Joey Styles

In a word, the show feels bigger this year. The Trump match is of course the real featured attraction but the two World Title matches aren’t bad either. We have John Cena defending the Raw World Title against Shawn Michaels and Royal Rumble winner Undertaker challenging Batista for the Smackdown World Title in a pretty important match. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Carlito/Ric Flair vs. Gregory Helms/Chavo Guerrero

Lumberjack match. Flair and Carlito had been a bit of an oddball mentor/mentee pairing. Helms (formerly Hurricane) and Chavo (Cruiserweight Champion, or Cruiserweight of the World according to ring announcer Lilian Garcia) are just a makeshift team. The lumberjacks really aren’t important enough to list off. The curtain is still down over the entrance, making for a very odd visual.

Flair and Helms get things going with Ric busting out some early chops. It’s off to Carlito as JBL (now a commentator due to a back injury) explains Flair taking Carlito under his wing to light a fire in him. Chavo is thrown to the floor but quickly gets tossed by in by Snitsky. Now it’s Helms knocking Carlito out to the floor for an easy return by the lumberjacks. Carlito gets double suplexed as JBL makes a thinly veiled fat joke about Aretha Franklin.

Helms slowly pounds Carlito down until a botched hurricanrana allows for the tag to Flair. The lumberjacks keep slapping the mat and it sounds like bubble wrap popping. Chops and backdrops abound but Helms saves Chavo from the Figure Four. Everything breaks down and Chavo misses the frog splash, allowing the tag to Carlito for a quick Backstabber to pin Chavo at 6:37.

Rating: C. Nice little tag match here and a refreshing change after the back to back battle royals. Flair is a treat for the fans and he doesn’t take anything away from the rest of the show. If nothing else it gives you a sense of how huge the crowd is as you can feel the energy of that many people in one place. Good choice for a dark match here and it worked just fine.

The opening video again focuses on the history of the show and Wrestlemania III in particular. There’s a good line about the show coming back to Detroit twenty years later with everyone all grown up, which was the tag line and theme of the show. It’s a simple idea but the campaign grew on me more and more every time I saw it.

We go back to Wrestlemania III for Vince’s introduction of Aretha Franklin, which is used to introduce her again for America the Beautiful, this time backed by a gospel choir.

The other opening video follows up on the theme of All Grown Up by showing kids dressed as various wrestlers and then showing them growing up. We also see some clips of people from early in their careers and then newer pictures of them through the years in a really cool concept. The voiceovers talk about people working their lives to get here to prove that they’re the best in a more standard Wrestlemania theme. Outstanding stuff here and they knocked it out of the park.

For the first time in a few years that sea of humanity is back. Sweet goodness that’s a lot of people.

Jeff Hardy vs. King Booker vs. Finlay vs. CM Punk vs. Mr. Kennedy vs. Matt Hardy vs. Randy Orton vs. Edge

Money in the Bank and the match has expanded to what would become the standard field. Booker won King of the Ring last year and started speaking with a British accent, I’m pretty sure you know who Punk is and Kennedy is a loudmouth who introduces himself twice (which was considered a great gimmick for some reason) and would become Mr. Anderson in TNA.

Orton and Kennedy go for the ladder to start as everyone else brawls outside. Finlay dives onto a big pile of people and Matt has to intercept Edge from climbing. That leaves Finlay and Orton to fight on top of the ladder but Kennedy makes the save. Booker goes for another ladder but finds out that it’s three feet tall. His reaction of disgust is good for a chuckle. Edge busts Punk open with a ladder and then bridges it between the apron and the barricade. There is no way that’s going to end well.

Booker beats up a bunch of people with spinebusters and a superkick until the Hardys crush him with a pair of ladders. Finlay saves Edge for reasons that aren’t clear and Matt gets shoved onto an overturned ladder. Kennedy puts Matt on a ladder and loads up the Kenton Bomb (swanton) but only hits ladder, landing square on the back of his head. That was sick. Jeff hits the swanton and it’s the brothers fighting on top of the ladder until Finlay shoves them down.

Edge comes back in and spears almost everyone until Punk leapfrogs him. Punk puts the ladder around his head and spins around, only to have Edge take him down with a spear, knocking the ladder into Orton and Finlay in the process. It’s time for the big ladder (you knew that was coming) but Orton shoves Edge off and out to the floor. Matt lays Edge on the ladder bridged at ringside and Jeff goes climbing. A huge legdrop BREAKS THE LADDER and crushes Edge in the process, leaving both guys dead at ringside.

Edge is taken out on a stretcher as Orton hits a string of RKOs. It’s Punk’s turn to make the save (though Orton wasn’t even under the briefcase) and climb, only to take a super RKO off the ladder for the next big spot. Booker has to block another RKO off the ladder and settles for a Book End (nowhere near as high) to plant Orton. Sharmell pulls Matt down so Booker can climb but the threat of a Twist of Fate brings Booker back down. Nice heroics there Matt.

A bloody Finlay shoves Matt off the ladder and a Celtic Cross (White Noise) drops Matt onto it for good measure. Cue Hornswoggle (Finlay’s leprechaun, later revealed as his son) to climb instead of the injured Finlay but Anderson makes the save with a Regal Roll off the ladder for one of the more bizarre spots of the match. Finlay dispatches Kennedy and goes up but Punk dropkicks (and bends) the ladder. Kennedy is right back up with a save though, allowing him to climb up (after moving the ladder around so he can look at the hard camera) for the win at 24:10.

Rating: B-. It was fun but they’re firmly into the standard Money in the Bank formula of having most of the people lay around and disappear after a long stretch of the match is over. If you noticed, there was a LONG stretch near the end where people were just gone for like five minutes each after a single spot. That would become the standard, no matter how repetitive it would get. Again: less people is more in this and WWE never quite remembered that. Kennedy would lose his briefcase to Edge due to a bad triceps injury with Edge winning the title soon after.

Clip of the debut of the Condemned, Steve Austin’s movie. Various wrestlers and audience members (part of 4,500 people at the premiere) all LOVED IT of course.

Kennedy congratulates himself on the win and warns any World Champion that he’s coming for them. Thank God he’s Mr. Money in the Bank. Bank.

Batista is All Grown Up. These videos will be on all night long with different people starting as kids and then becoming what they are today and narrating about what it means to them.

Great Khali vs. Kane

Khali is a 7’7 monster who was brought in as the modern day Giant Gonzalez and was about as talented. Kane is one of the only people who can come close to matching his size but Khali shoves him down with ease to start. A throat snap across the top rope staggers Khali but the even bigger giant slams the smaller giant with ease. JR gets in the bowling shoe reference and it’s very accurate at this point. Kane’s comeback is shrugged away with a flick of the arm and the top rope clothesline doesn’t even put Khali down.

Instead another right hand ties Khali up in the ropes…..and it’s time for a big metal meathook. It’s a prop from Kane’s horror movie See No Evil but Khali knocks it out of his hand and rips open a turnbuckle with one hand. The referee has to go tend to that so Kane hits Khali with the hook, setting up a slam designed to recreate Hogan slamming Andre. It doesn’t quite work the same way (understatement of the year) but it was an impressive visual. Not that it matters though as the Tree Slam (a double chokeslam later called the Punjabi Plunge) is good enough to give Khali the pin at 5:32.

Rating: D. That slam was impressive but this was a squash otherwise. Khali as a monster was a good fit, but Undertaker had already destroyed him in the big gimmick match last year. Therefore he would wind up as the Smackdown World Champion over the summer due to yet another injury in the main event scene. Good idea here but it didn’t work due to Khali’s limitations.

Khali chokes him with the chain post match.

The Divas are All Grown Up.

Cryme Tyme (a street thug tag team who stole a lot of stuff and would probably get the company a bad reprimand today) talks to Eugene and tell him they’re going to hook him up. They head down the hall to find Extreme Expose (Kelly Kelly, Brooke Adams and Layla, three very good looking women who danced all the time) in matching outfits. The crowd greatly approves but Eugene is more intrigued by Moolah and Mae Young in similar outfits.

Reverend Slick comes in to join the party (now with a disco ball) but Dusty Rhodes takes over instead. This brings in Sgt. Slaughter, Jimmy Hart, IRS, Gerald Brisco and finally Ricky Steamboat in karate gear. Ron Simmons comes in for his one word catchphrase (a bad word beginning with D) to cap the whole thing off, as was his custom. Funny stuff here as usual and always entertaining.

US Title: MVP vs. Chris Benoit

Benoit is defending. MVP (Montel Vontaveous Porter) is a very arrogant athlete modeled on Deion Sanders from the 1990s. He gets a big entrance with his own cheerleaders, which really does fit his over the top, self obsessed character. They hit the mat to start with MVP cranking on the leg for a very early advantage. Benoit can’t get in a German and the threat of a Crossface sends Benoit out to the floor.

MVP counters the Sharpshooter but has to crawl backwards to escape another threat of a Crossface. Benoit’s shoulder is draped across the top rope to change momentum. Cole: “Smart move by MVP to go after the arm.” More like common sense Cole. Some German suplexes look to set up the Swan Dive but MVP takes him down with a superplex, only to have Benoit tie up the legs for two on the landing.

The bad arm goes into the post again and we hit the armbar. Benoit’s quick Crossface attempt is blocked by some shots to the arm as JBL goes on about how awesome MVP is, basically guaranteeing his loss. Some Germans give Benoit a reprieve and the Swan Dive gives him the pin to retain at 9:21.

Rating: C-. Not the worst here but they arm stuff was just stopped and Benoit hit another of his multiple finishers to win. MVP had a ton of charisma and a great energy to him but I never got the appeal of him after the bell rang. There’s a decent story here of MVP having the submissions countered but Benoit having the experience to beat him another way but it really didn’t work in the end. MVP would win the title the next month so I guess this was part one?

Undertaker is All Grown Up.

Donald Trump is in his dressing room, annoyed that he and Miss USA have no food or beverages. Boogeyman comes in and Trump doesn’t even get off his phone. He asks for some food and just completely no sells everything from Boogeyman. That was hilarious for some reason, even though it makes Boogeyman look even worse than he is but that’s WAY past saving already.

Hall of Fame recap from last night. The speeches about Mr. Perfect were rough to sit through. Actor William Shatner inducted Jerry Lawler, even though Lawler specifically asked for longtime Memphis announcer Lance Russell to do it. WWE said no because Shatner had more star power. True, but how many people watched the ceremony because William Shatner was making a speech?

Attendance record announcement.

Time for the Hall of Fame presentation (why do the attendance in the middle?): Jim Ross, Mr. Perfect (represented by his father, which is always sad), Jerry Lawler (he had to go in with JR), Nick Bockwinkel (classy as always), Mr. Fuji (who looks about 90), the Wild Samoans, the Original Sheik (represented by his wife) and Dusty Rhodes. No one really got a bigger reaction than anyone else but the acoustics are weird in a place this big.

82% of fans think Undertaker is winning tonight. Dang maybe they’re smarter than they think.

We recap Undertaker vs. Batista. Undertaker won the Royal Rumble and then picked Batista. They had a nothing tag match at No Way Out 2007 and Batista laid him out in retaliation for some attacks by Undertaker. This match really didn’t need a story but they tried to wedge one in there anyway. Thankfully they kept it simple and went with “come watch two big guys beat each other up with power moves.”

Smackdown World Title: Undertaker vs. Batista

Batista is defending and Smackdown GM Teddy Long is announcing for some reason. Both guys are faces coming in so this could be interesting. Of course we have the druids and torches which never get old. Batista spears him down at the bell and the fans instantly boo. Right hands put Batista into the corner but Undertaker stops to glare at the referee, allowing Batista to come back with a big clothesline.

They slug it out on the floor with Undertaker’s knees going hard into the steps. Back in and Batista’s top rope shoulder block gets two and it’s time for a slugout. A big boot to Batista’s face just makes him clothesline Undertaker harder, this time for two. Undertaker slugs back from his knees and it’s Snake Eyes into another big boot, followed by a legdrop for two (brother).

Old School sets up a countered chokeslam so Undertaker runs him over. They’re just beating each other up here and it’s awesome to watch. The apron legdrop has Batista in even more trouble and there’s the Taker Dive for good measure. Batista comes right back by throwing Undertaker through the timekeeper’s area. Not into, but through. A bunch of big right hands have Undertaker in even more trouble but Batista wants tables.

Instead of setting up his own he takes over the Spanish announcers’ table (good Animal), loads Undertaker up for a powerslam, and runs down the two tables to drive Undertaker through the English table. When all else fails (and this is FAR from failing), slam through through furniture. Back in and the Batista Bomb is broken up so Batista belly to belly suplexes him down for two.

Now, say it with me: Batista pounds away in the corner and gets caught in the Last Ride. Man he deserves that crash landing for being so stupid. Batista comes back with a spinebuster but walks into a chokeslam for two. The Tombstone is countered and another spear sets up the Batista Bomb for a VERY close two and a roar from the crowd. Back up and Batista tries a Tombstone (moron!) but Undertaker slips out and hits the real thing to win the title at 15:48.

Rating: A-. 15-0, two World Titles and a win over all four members of Evolution at Wrestlemania. That’s one heck of a career and he’s done it all at Wrestlemania. This was the first match in the feud of the year as the two of them would fight up through December with Batista finally getting the title back.

One of the important things about this match is they didn’t try to be anything else than what it was. The fans wanted to see two big, strong guys beating the tar out of each other for fifteen minutes and that’s exactly what they got. They were going at it as soon as the bell rang and it never stopped. That’s how you make a match work and a World Title match makes it even better.

More importantly than the title though, this is arguably the match where Undertaker started the second phase of his career where he went from featured attraction to having one of the best resurgences anyone has ever seen. A lot of that is due to this match’s spot on the card. The rumor goes that Undertaker and Batista were ticked off over being put on fourth and in the first major match slot so they decided to go out there and steal the show. The thing is, almost everyone says they wanted to do that but the impressive thing is to actually pull it off. Great stuff here and it’s going to take something special to beat this.

Bobby Lashley is All Grown Up.

Vince is admiring himself in the mirror when Stephanie wheels her daughter in. As you might expect, Vince steals the stroller and of course there’s a camera inside so we can look at Vince doing baby talk about fracturing Donald Trump’s skull.

ECW Originals vs. New Breed

Originals: Rob Van Dam, Tommy Dreamer, Sandman, Sabu

New Breed: Elijah Burke, Marcus Cor Von, Matt Striker, Kevin Thorn

The names of the groups alone should explain the idea here. ECW was back but there was a faction that wanted to be the new ECW stars, setting up the first major story. Dreamer is an ECW icon who was considered the heart and soul of the original promotion, Sandman likes to drink a lot and Sabu is crazy. Burke is a loudmouth who leads the group (later known as the Pope D’Angelo Dinero in TNA), Cor Von is a big athletic freak better known as Monty Brown and Thorn is a vampire with a manager named Ariel. One fall to a finish here instead of the tables match they had a few months later.

Sabu and Striker get things going with the former teacher being draped over the top rope so Sandman can drop a leg across his back. Burke comes in to face Dreamer but Sandman stays in to help with a double elbow. It’s off to Cor Von for the power as he throws Dreamer around with a butterfly suplex, followed by the Elijah Express (running double knees to the back in the corner) for two.

Thorn plants him with a powerbomb and it’s back to Cor Von for a chinlock. Dreamer fights up and tries a reverse DDT but grabs a neckbreaker to Burke at the same time. The hot tag brings in Van Dam to clean house, including a big monkey flip to Striker. Dreamer adds the DDT and the Five Star puts Striker away at 6:24.

Rating: D. I know I listed a bunch of moves there but there wasn’t anything else to talk about. There was nothing that made me think these teams hated each other or were even mad at each other, leaving this as just a basic eight man tag. I’m not the biggest ECW fan, but it’s pretty remarkable that they made it all the way to Wrestlemania, even if it’s years after the company folded.

Steve Austin is All Grown Up. A kid who looks like Austin slams milk together to drink it like Austin does beer. Were he and Kurt Angle switched at birth?

Wrestlemania XXIV is in Orlando, somehow the first time the show took place in Florida.

Video on celebrities saying they want to see Trump get his head shaved. Only Rock wants Vince to get shaved.

We recap the Battle of the Billionaires. To sum up the whole thing, Lashley and Umaga are behind the billionaires and Austin as guest referee in the graphic. The story here isn’t really necessary to set up but basically Trump showed up on Fan Appreciation Night and said Vince wasn’t very well liked. Trump came back the next month and set up the match with both guys picking a representatives. Austin is there as referee for more star power.

Bobby Lashley vs. Umaga

Losing billionaire gets their head shaved. Lashley (representing Trump) is ECW Champion and Umaga (Representing McMahon. Umaga is a Samoan monster and managed by Armando Alejandro Estrada) is Intercontinental Champion but this is non-title. To show you how big this is, the barber’s chair, barber’s pole and shaving equipment are put on a cart and taken down to the ring with its own music. Trump comes out with former Miss USA Tara Conner and real money rains down from the ceiling. All the entrances take over ten minutes.

They slug it out to start as this is power vs. power. Lashley takes over to start and drops Estrada with a right hand, followed by low bridging a charging Umaga to the floor. Back in and Lashley misses a charge of his own, setting up a splash from Umaga for two. Trump is WAY into this on the floor, which is all you would expect from him here.

Austin has to pull Umaga off Lashley in the corner and it’s time for the big sta2013 Redown. Umaga starts in on the chest to take away Lashley’s air. A Samoan drop plants Lashley again and Trump is looking very sweaty. Vince gets on the apron and is quickly knocked off, leaving Lashley to slam Umaga off the top. Neither guy can follow up though and Austin gets to a ten count but then says get up and fight because there’s no countout.

Cue Shane McMahon to check on his dad (it wasn’t that hard of a fall off the apron) as Austin pulls Umaga out of the corner. For some reason he goes by the eye, resulting in a Samoan Spike to the neck. Yeah Umaga’s finisher was a thumb to the neck. It never made sense to me either. Shane comes in to try and beat on Lashley but gets suplexed, only to have Umaga knock Lashley down in the corner.

That means it’s time for the Coast to Coast from Shane, driving a garbage can into Lashley’s face. We’re not done though as Shane pulls off his shirt to reveal referee attire (JR: “It’s insider trading!” Huh?). Umaga connects with a top rope splash but Austin pulls Shane out at two. That earns Austin another Samoan Spike so TRUMP CLOTHESLINES VINCE for the big moment of the night. Umaga pushes his luck by trying a third Samoan Spike on Austin but gets a Stunner instead, setting up the spear from Lashley to get rid of Vince’s hair at 13:04.

Rating: C-. Oh come on. Do you really think the wrestling here matted in the slightest? There was no way Vince was winning here and Trump was always going to come out on top, which is pure Vince as he’ll take however many the team needs at the drop of a hat. The match itself was an acceptable power match and Trump did a good job with that clothesline. Well as good as it was going to be from Donald Trump. It’s an acceptable match and drew more money than anything ever had to that point so everybody wins.

Post match Austin Stuns Shane as Vince runs. Lashley chases him down (“TIME TO GET BALD!”) and feeds him to Austin for a Stunner, followed by the big shaving. Lashley and Trump do the honors while Austin holds Vince in place be he had to be involved somehow. This would lead to a long feud between Vince and Lashley with Vince becoming ECW Champion to kill the belt once and for all.

A song called Bald Headed Blues plays and my goodness Vince looks funny bald. Vince slumps away with shaving cream on his head (Lawler: “You ever notice how big Vince McMahon’s ears are?”) while the good guys all drink. Trump takes a Stunner for the real photo op of the show. The worst part: he took it better than most people and his hair is still perfect.

John Cena is All Grown Up.

Clips of the dark match to give them time to clean the ring.

Women’s Title: Ashley Massaro vs. Melina

Melina (MNM’s manager and a very talented wrestler) is defending and this is a lumberjill match. Ashley is the Playboy cover girl this year so that means she should get a title shot. The champ is wearing a HUGE fur coat and JBL thinks she looks ridiculous. It’s a catfight to start with Ashley hammering away and choking in the corner (totally not an excuse for upskirt shots). A giant swing makes Ashley dizzy but she knocks Melina down again, only to miss a middle rope elbow. Back up and Melina reverses an O’Connor roll into a rollup for the pin at 3:14.

Rating: F. Nothing but a cool down match and that’s not something that is going to be very good most of the time. Ashley was another name on a long list of women there for her looks and barely able to walk around a ring without screwing something up. Bad match but that was rarely in double. Pay no attention to the talent on the floor as a meaningless lumberjack while the model gets the match.

The good lumberjills clean house post match.

Shawn Michaels is All Grown Up.

Cena is favored to retain the title 59% to 41%.

We recap Cena vs. Michaels. Shawn came in second in the 2007 Royal Rumble and then won a triple threat to earn the title match. Cena and Michaels then became partners, but Cena was reminded that Michaels would turn on every partner he had no matter what. They wound up winning the Raw Tag Team Titles and hold them coming into this match with Shawn still promising to turn on Cena soon.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Shawn Michaels

Cena is defending. Shawn comes to the ring to DX music (he and HHH, who is injured again, reunited last year) instead of his classic theme. Shawn: “OH I LOVE MY JOB!” It’s Cena’s turn and we see a Ford Mustang speeding through the (empty) streets of Detroit and coming towards the arena. It comes inside and then drives into the arena through a wall of glass with John Cena driving as you might have guessed. Neither guy bothers bringing their Tag Team Title with them.

Shawn ducks a right hand to start and slaps Cena into the corner. Things stay fast as Shawn dodges a string of punches and knocks the champ down again. Shawn works on the arm for a bit until Cena just takes his head off with a clothesline to get his first offense going. The fans are WAY behind Shawn here as he hiptosses Cena to the floor. An enziguri puts Cena on the announcers’ table and Shawn tries an Asai moonsault, only to have the table not give way, leaving Shawn’s knees to crash against the wood.

Back in and Shawn punches Cena in the knee for a target and wraps it around the post. Cena has to hop around the ring on one leg so Shawn bends the bad one around the ropes and chop blocks the champ down. It works so well that Shawn wraps it around the ropes again but Cena punches his way out of trouble. When all else fails, hit the other guy in the face. Shawn misses a charge and goes head first into the post to draw some blood. Oh yeah now we should get going.

Cena hammers away at the cut like the vicious man he can become, setting up the Shuffle. The FU (the knee is fine already) is escaped and Sweet Chin Music hits the referee by mistake. Another FU attempt is countered into a DDT and both guys are down. It’s Shawn up first and he starts feeling evil, meaning it’s time for a piledriver onto the steps (THUD). The back of Cena’s head is busted open and a second referee runs in to count two.

Shawn’s forearm and nipup set up the top rope elbow but the superkick is broken up by another huge clothesline. A slugout goes to Cena so he loads up the FU but has to kick out of a sunset flip counter. Shawn’s leapfrog is countered into the FU and both guys are down. A delayed cover gets two (I’m fine with the extra kicking out of finishers if it’s not immediate and therefore doesn’t weaken the move) so the frustrated Cena loads up a middle rope FU.

Shawn would rather not be ended so he elbows out and tries a high cross body, only to have Cena catch him in the FU. Michaels flips out again and tries Sweet Chin Music but gets countered into an STF attempt. That doesn’t go on either as Shawn grabs a small package for two with Cena having to power out.

An enziguri misses and the STFU goes on but Shawn eventually makes the ropes. Back up and Sweet Chin Music connects out of nowhere but he can’t cover. Both guys are up at nine as they have to lean on each other to stand. More Sweet Chin Music misses and Cena grabs the leg to pull Shawn into the STFU for the submission at 28:22.

Rating: A. I don’t know if Shawn or Cena is more deserving of the praise but you can see how much Cena has grown in the last year. There was no way Cena could have had this match just a year ago and they were really testing each other out there. Cena still doesn’t have the selling thing down (the leg) but he knew how to make the drama work at a level he couldn’t even think of the previous year. Shawn deserves a lot of credit too as he can make a match work with anyone. Great stuff here and worthy of the main event, though they might have topped it with their 55 minute classic in London three weeks later.

Cena cries after the match and the highlights end the show.

Overall Rating: B+. The two World Title matches more than delivered and the money match brought in a fortune so it’s hard to call this anything less than good. There’s a great atmosphere as well and the show felt like one of the biggest of all time. It’s a major improvement over last year and a forgotten semi-classic. The focus being on the billionaires make people forget about the rest of the card but there’s a lot of other good stuff on here. It’s not a perfect show by any means but this was much more fun than I remembered. Check it out if you have the time.

Ratings Comparison

CM Punk vs. Mr. Kennedy vs. Finlay vs. Randy Orton vs. King Booker vs. Jeff Hardy vs. Booker T vs. Edge

Original: B+

2013 Redo: B

2015 Redo: B-

Great Khali vs. Kane

Original: D

2013 Redo: D-

2015 Redo: D

Chris Benoit vs. MVP

Original: B

2013 Redo: C

2015 Redo: C-

Undertaker vs. Batista

Original: B+

2013 Redo: A

2015 Redo: A-

ECW Originals vs. New Breed

Original: D+

2013 Redo: D

2015 Redo: D

Bobby Lashley vs. Umaga

Original: C-

2013 Redo: D

2015 Redo: C-

Melina vs. Ashley

Original: F

2013 Redo: M (for Mickie James)

2015 Redo: F

John Cena vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: A

2013 Redo: A-

2015 Redo: A

Overall Rating

Original: B

2013 Redo: B+

2015 Redo: B+

This one is famous for one match and I’m leaving it at that.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/30/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-23-over-80000-people/

And the 2013 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/04/01/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-xxiii-shawn-is-better-than-hhh/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania XXIII (2013 Redo): You Have Angered The Undertaker

Wrestlemania XXIII
Date: April 1, 2007
Location: Ford Field, Detroit, Michigan
Attendance: 80,103
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz, John Bradshaw Layfield, Joey Styles

To say this show was a success is an understatement. Until Rock vs. Cena, this show drew more PPV buys than any show in the history of the company, which says a lot when you consider what came before it. The main event here is Bobby Lashley vs. Umaga, which is the Battle of the Billionaires, as Donald Trump and Vince are backing the two respectively. The losing billionaire gets his head shaved. There’s also Cena vs. Shawn in what should be awesome. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is a montage of Wrestlemania logos which turns into your usual highlight reel.

We get a clip of the opening of Wrestlemania III before transitioning to Ford Field in the same city. Aretha Franklin is here again twenty years later to sing America the Beautiful again. That’s a very nice touch, as are the clips from Tribute to the Troops.

Now we get the video for this year’s show, which is the All Grown Up theme. It’s a bunch of kids dressed like the stars who then turn into their adult selves.

Mr. Kennedy vs. CM Punk vs. Randy Orton vs. Finlay vs. Matt Hardy vs. King Booker vs. Jeff Hardy vs. Edge

With this match, we start the tradition of having too many people in a single MITB match and overcrowding the thing. Everyone looks up at the case until Kennedy goes to get a ladder. Orton heads to the floor to stop him as the big brawl begins. Finlay DIVES on everyone not named Edge, allowing the Canadian to make a climb, only to be stopped by Matt. They head to the floor, allowing Orton and Finlay to head up top for a brawl on the ladder.

They topple to the floor so it’s Jeff going up, only to be shoved down by Kennedy. Booker goes to pull out a ladder but it’s Horny’s, meaning it’s only about two feet tall. Punk takes it away and pounds on people with it, only to have Edge take over again. This is one of those matches that moves too fast to really keep track of things. Punk is bleeding from the forehead as Edge bridges a ladder between the ring and barricade.

Back inside and Booker takes over with kicks and spinebusters for everyone in sight. Before climbing though, here’s a Spinarooni. The distraction lets the Hardys crush Booker with some ladders before Matt and Edge go at it a bit. The Hardys set up a ladder seesaw but Jeff is sent off the top to break up whatever they were going to do to Edge. Instead Edge suplexes Matt onto the ladder, only to be sent to the floor by Kennedy.

Kennedy pounds away on Matt but the Kenton Bomb only hits ladder. Instead it’s Jeff with a Swanton to Mr. before the brothers team up to drop everyone in sight with the ladder. Both Hardys go up and start slugging it out on top of the ladder, only to be shoved into the top rope by Finlay. Edge hits the spear on Finlay and one for Orton and Booker as well. Kennedy and Matt take spears too and there’s one for Jeff to nearly complete the set. Punk jumps over Edge to send him into the corner and become the only man standing.

Punk puts the ladder around his head and spins around a bit to take everyone out until Edge thinks wisely and DUCKS, allowing him to take out Punk’s vulnerable ribs. Edge gets the big ladder and makes a climb, only to gets caught by Orton and shoved down to the floor. Jeff saves that though and climbs up on his own as Matt puts Edge on the ladder between the ring and the barricade. Jeff dives off the ladder THROUGH EDGE AND THROUGH THE LADDER! Needless to say, Edge and Jeff are DONE.

We’re down to six people in the match now and it’s Orton’s turn to take over with RKOs all around. He picks up a regular sized ladder but Punk knocks him down and sets up a second ladder in the middle of the ring. Apparently Jeff is still on the floor despite Edge being taken out. Orton and Punk both climb up and it’s an RKO off the top of the ladder to end Punk. Booker goes up but has to stop an RKO attempt with a Bookend off the ladder.

It’s Matt vs. Booker on the ladder but Matt drops down and threatens to give Sharmell the Twist of Fate, drawing Booker down. There’s the Twist to the King but Finlay (sporting a NASTY cut on the back of his head) shoves the ladder over. The Celtic Cross (White Noise) crushes Matt against the ladder but hurts Finlay’s back in the process. Finlay is barely able to stand so here’s Horny to climb for him.

Instead though Kennedy pops up the ladder….and gets smacked in the face by Horny. There’s a fireman’s carry roll off the ladder for the little guy’s efforts. Finlay destroys Kennedy with the ladder but gets knocked off the ladder by Matt. Now it’s Punk going up but Kennedy meets him on the ladder for a slugout. Punk shoves him off but Kennedy spears him in the ribs with another ladder, allowing Kennedy to climb up and win the case.

Rating: B. This was definitely the weakest of the matches so far as there were too many people in there and no one to have the big spots like Shelton. It’s definitely good but this one lacked the pop that most of these matches had over the years. Kennedy would lose the case to Edge a few weeks later.

Video on the premiere of The Condemned so we can clear the ring out.

Kennedy warns every champion that he’s coming for them and says he’s Mr. Money in the Bank. Bank.

Batista is All Grown Up.

Great Khali vs. Kane

This is when Khali is still a decent monster who could move a little bit. Kane is easily shoved down to start and then shoved to the floor for good measure. Back in and Kane slugs Khali, only to be chopped right back down. Off to the nerve hold before Khali slugs away in the corner. Kane comes back with punches of his own but is easily shoved down and across the ring.

Kane fires back with a right hand and tries the top rope clothesline but it only staggers Khali. Another shot sends Khali into the ropes and Kane has his opening. Kane heads to the floor and grabs a chain with a hook on the end which he used in the horror movie he was in around this time. Khali knocks him back and rips off the turnbuckle pad to distract the referee, allowing Kane to kick him low. In one of the big spots of the show, Kane slams Khali ala Hogan slamming Andre twenty years ago. That only gets two so they both grab chokeslams, but it’s Khali hitting the Punjabi Plunge for the one footed pin.

Rating: D-. The slam was cool and the rest was completely horrible. Khali was nothing good and somehow he would get even worse. Kane was in that weird period for him where he was just kind of there and doing nothing of note. By period, I mean about a five year stretch of course. Terrible match but the slam was good.

Post match Khali chokes him out with the chain and no one makes the save.

The Divas say they’re All Grown Up. The idea of taking them seriously is amusing.

Cryme Tyme tries to cheer up a now bald Eugene with an Extreme Expose dance party. That would be Kelly, Layla and Brooke (now Tessmacher) as a dance troupe. Instead Moolah and Mae Young show up and Eugene wants to dance with them. Cue REVEREND SLICK of all people to show us how it’s done. This brings in Dusty Rhodes who says you can’t have a dance party without him. The music comes back on and here are Sgt. Slaughter, Jimmy Hart and IRS to join in. Ricky Steamboat in full karate attire shows up until we get the Ron Simmons payoff.

Some Detroit Tigers are here.

US Title: MVP vs. Chris Benoit

Benoit is defending and MVP is pretty new here. They head to the mat to start with MVP actually in control. Off to a headlock by the challenger but he has to shove Benoit to the floor to avoid the Crossface. Back in and Benoit can’t hook the Crossface as MVP keeps it on the mat with the headlocks. Back up and MVP pounds Benoit into the corner but charges into an elbow. A superplex attempt is blocked and Benoit’s arm is draped across the top rope to shift momentum again.

Back in and MVP works over the bad arm with some driving shoulder blocks. He misses a spinning kick though and Benoit busts out the Rolling Germans. The Swan Dive is broken up though and MVP goes back to the arm by sending it into the post. Off to an armbar again, followed by a running clothesline for two. Out of nowhere Benoit reverses a slam into a Crossface attempt but the arm is too weak to hook the hold. This time the slam works and there’s the Ballin elbow for two. MVP misses a charge into the corner and it’s time to roll some Germans. After four of those, Benoit hits the Swan Dive to retain.

Rating: C. Yeah that’s it. The match really never got off the ground and could have used another four minutes or so. As always the scariest part is thinking that Benoit only had about two months left so he likely wasn’t sane during this match. The match itself wasn’t bad but as mentioned it never got off the ground. MVP would win the title at Backlash and hold it for almost a year.

Video on Undertaker who is All Grown Up….I think.

Donald Trump is in his dressing room and complaining about the lack of food and drinks backstage. Boogeyman comes in for no apparent reason and Trump doesn’t seem impressed. Trump asks him for a sandwich. This uh…..happened. Yeah we’ll go with that.

Hall of Fame time. Mr. Perfect was one of the headliners here and gets a pretty touching tribute. William Shatner inducted Lawler, which is kind of annoying as Lawler had wanted Lance Russell (announcer of Memphis Wrestling for like forty years) to do it but WWE said no and picked Shatner because of a forgotten segment on Raw back in like 1995. The other headliner was Dusty Rhodes who asked to be made an honorary Horseman. That’s just wrong. No presentation to the crowd here which is weird.

The attendance is over 80,000, which is of course a new record.

Here’s the Fink because what would Wrestlemania be without him? Oh ok he’s doing the Hall of Fame live presentation to the crowd. JR gets easily the biggest pop of the entire class.

82% of the fans think Undertaker will win the title.

We recap Undertaker vs. Batista but there isn’t much to say. Taker won the Rumble and picked Batista for an awesome power match. They had to team up at No Way Out and Batista turned on him to give us a one night only heel, even though that’s not really too far out of Batista’s normal behavior.

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. Undertaker

Teddy Long does the intros here for some reason. We lso get the druids and the torches, which look AWESOME in the huge stadiums like this. The bell rings and Batista spears Taker down before pounding away in the corner. Undertaker fires off right hands of his own but Batista throws him right back into the corner. The fans are totally behind Undertaker here. They head to the floor with Undertaker being sent knees first into the steps as is his custom.

Back in and Batista hits a top rope shoulder for two. If you’re listening to Cole, you would think he had hit a 450. A big clothesline puts Taker down for two but Undertaker comes back with right hands and a running charge in the corner. The Snake Eyes and big boot combo puts Batista down and a legdrop gets two. Old School connects but Big Dave powers out of the chokeslam to huge booing.

The jumping clothesline puts Batista down again but only for two. Taker puts him on the apron for the elbow and legdrops before busting out the Taker Dive as is his custom at Wrestlemania. Taker pounds away even more but Batista counters to throw him through part of the barricade to take over. With Undertaker dazed, Batista loads up a powerslam from one announce table through the other, which actually isn’t countered.

Back in and that only gets two so the champion pounds away more for good measure. Batista loads up the Bomb but Taker plows him into the corner to counter. Dave comes right back with a belly to belly suplex for two. He pounds on Taker in the corner like a schmuck and of course there’s the Last Ride for two. Taker has a breather but walks right into the spinebuster.

Batista doesn’t cover though and gets caught in a chokeslam for a VERY close two. The Tombstone is countered and Batista hits the spear and Batista Bomb for an even closer two, shocking the champion. Batista loads up another Bomb but Taker backdrops out of it and avoids a spear, setting up the Tombstone for the title.

Rating: A. The idea is that these two were annoyed and decided to have an awesome match to show everyone up. These two would go on to have more great matches on shows where Batista actually had a chance to win. This was the feud of the year and it’s hard to argue as they could both work the power game like few others.

Lashley is All Grown Up.

Vince is in the back looking in a mirror when Stephanie comes in with a stroller. Vince goes off on Stephanie before playing with his granddaughter. Naturally there’s a camera from inside the stroller looking up at Vince. He promises to fracture Trump’s skull.

Joey tries to talk about the ECW Originals vs. the New Breed but we need to get this along.

New Breed vs. ECW Originals

It’s Elijah Burke/Matt Striker/Kevin Thron/Marcus Cor Van vs. Rob Van Dam/Tommy Dreamer/Sabu and for no reason whatsoever this is a regular eight man tag instead of the Extreme Rules match we would get on ECW a few days later. Striker starts with Sabu and Matt is in early trouble. It’s quickly off to Sandman vs. Burke but before Sandy does much he brings in Dreamer. Cor Von hits Dreamer in the back and comes in to pound away a bit.

It’s quickly back to Burke (the New Breed’s leader and more famous as D’Angelo Dinero) for the running knees to the back for two. Thorn comes in to crush Dreamer into the corner and put on a chinlock. Back up and a sitout powerbomb gets two for Thorn and here’s Cor Von again. Burke comes in as well but Dreamer takes them down with a simultaneous neckbreaker/reverse DDT combo. The hot tag brings in Van Dam and there’s the top rope kick to Thorn. Rolling Thunder lands on Striker as everything breaks down. With everyone else on the floor, Van Dam Five Stars Striker for the pin.

Rating: D+. Seriously, why wasn’t this the Extreme Rules match? The whole point of ECW is to be extreme but we got a seven minute tag match which went nowhere at all. The theory was to finally let these guys get on Wrestlemania, but Van Dam had been on it before and won a title here. Nothing to see here at all.

Austin is All Grown Up.

Wrestlemania 24 is in Orlando.

We recap the real main event for tonight’s show and the reason why this show was the highest drawing show ever for the next five years. Vince and Donald Trump both agreed to back a guy into a match and the losing billionaire would get their head shaved. This was when Trump was still a big deal and EVERYONE was backing Umaga because they wanted to see Trump bald. Oh except for Rock who actually cut a promo about wanting to see Vince bald.

Trump picked the ECW World Champion Bobby Lashley. Steve Austin was brought in to referee because this is Wrestlemania. The best part of the build was Lashley in a cage with Umaga on the floor. To escape, Lashley shoulder blocked the cage wall, knocking it down to the floor and nearly crushing Umaga in the process.

Bobby Lashley vs. Umaga

The barber’s chair gets its own entrance complete with some snappy music. Oh and Umaga is IC Champion. Trump coming out to a song with the only word being MONEY is perfect. Real money rains down from the ceiling, including $100 bills. To be fair this show brought in like 50 million dollars in PPV alone so they can afford a bit. They collide to start and slug it out with Lashley pounding him into the corner. Austin pulls Lashley off of Umaga since they’re in the ropes and Umaga gets in some shots of him own. Lashley goes up to the middle rope for a shoulder for two.

Umaga’s manager Armando Estrada is dragged in by Lashley and powerslammed down with ease. Lashley throws him out to the floor and low bridges Umaga to send him to the floor as well. Back in and Lashley misses a spear, sending him out to the floor this time. We head inside again and Umaga chokes away, only to be pulled off at four and a half by Austin. Austin has to do it again, this time by the hair for good measure.

A BIG clothesline puts Lashley down again and Umaga cannonballs down onto his chest for good measure. The Samoan drop puts Lashley down again as does a failed slam attempt. Vince gets up on the apron and gets dropped down by an elbow from Lashley, only to walk into a shot from Umaga to take over again. Umaga goes up and gets slammed down before being clotheslined down. Both guys down and Austin gets to nine before stopping so it doesn’t end in a draw.

Shane McMahon comes out to check on Vince as Umaga hits an uppercut to drop Lashley again. Austin has to pull Umaga out of the corner, earning him a Samoan Spike. Shane comes in and pounds away on Lashley until Umaga is back into things. The running hip attack crushes Bobby’s face and Vince throws in some trashcans. Shane hits the Coast to Coast to drive the can into Lashley’s face. A top rope splash from Umaga crushes Lashley and Shane has a referee’s shirt on now.

Austin breaks up the pin and beats up Shane for good measure, only to walk into another Samoan Spike. Trump isn’t sure what to do and shows off those great acting skills of his. Vince comes over to taunt him and TRUMP CLOTHESLINES VINCE! Umaga tries another Spike on Austin but gets countered into the Stunner. The spear from Lashley connects and it’s time for Vince to be bald.

Rating: D. This match sucked for the most part until Austin got going. The problem at the end of the day was no one on the planet with any idea what was going on here thought Vince was going to win. It also didn’t help that no one cared about Lashley because no one had ever given us a reason to. He was just kind of there for the most part and there was nothing more to him than he used to be a college wrestler and he’s muscular. Seriously, that’s Lashley’s story almost in full.

Post match they take FOREVER to Stun Vince and cut his hair. Austin Stuns him because that’s what Austin does to Vince. To their credit though, they SHAVE his head, not just trim it. Vince’s face during this whole thing is great as he goes from shock to the patented Vince rage in a few seconds. This led to three months of Vince/Shane/Umaga vs. Lashley which didn’t work for the most part. Austin, Lashley and Trump share beers and Trump gets Stunned. I’ll give the guy this: he has a soft spot for wrestling. He hosted two Wrestlemanias, was in the crowd for two more and did this.

John Cena is All Grown Up.

For no apparent reason other than we have nothing else to talk about, we look at the dark match with Flair/Carlito vs. Gregory Helms/Chavo Guerrero in a lumberjack match.

Womens Title: Melina vs. Ashley

It’s a lumberjill match and all of the other Divas are introduced. Melina is defending here because thank goodness Ashley never got the title. Ashley, who isn’t a wrestler, takes Melina down and pounds away. The crowd is audibly quiet for this match and can you blame them? Ashley pounds away in the corner and does some bad choking but Melina comes back by SCREAMING. Off to a bow and arrow for a bit as I have no interest in watching this match at all. Ashley misses an elbow and thankfully Melina reverses a rollup into one of her own to retain.

Rating: M. As in Mickie James, who was on the floor during this match instead of in the ring. Point blank, Ashley cannot wrestle. She was decent looking, but other than that she had nothing going for her at all. This was a popcorn break match and thankfully it was barely three minutes long as I couldn’t sit through much longer.

Shawn Michaels is All Grown Up.

We recap Michaels vs. Cena. Shawn won a triple threat to set this up and then won the tag titles with Cena. The idea is Shawn has turned on every one of his partners in his career and he’ll do it again here. No music video here for some reason.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Shawn Michaels

Remember that they’re tag champions here but neither guy wears the belt. I can’t say I blame them of course. Cena’s special entrance this year is driving a muscle car from “the parking lot” into the arena due to being in Detroit. They circle each other to start before Shawn slaps him in the face. A quick headlock doesn’t do much for Shawn so he uses his speed advantage to pop John with some right hands. Back to the headlock and it works a bit better this time as Shawn takes Cena down to the mat.

Cena has had enough of this defense thing and rings Shawn’s bell with a clothesline. Shawn is sent to the apron but he tosses Cena from the ring and out to the floor. A BIG chop staggers Cena but Shawn’s Asai Moonsault hits mostly table and Shawn is hurt. Luckily for him though Cena is even more hurt as they head back inside. Shawn chops away in the corner before going after Cena’s knee. The leg is wrapped around the post and Cena is in trouble. The referee asks Cena if he can continue and of course Cena says yes.

Shawn keeps kicking at the leg before wrapping it around the ring rope. With Cena down in the corner, Shawn stares straight at him to play even more mind games. Back up and John hits a big right hand to send Shawn flying across the ring. Shawn charges straight back at him with a shoulder into the ribs in the corner to keep control. Michaels charges again but Cena’s leg gives out and Shawn goes head first into the post, busting him open.

Cena has had enough of getting beaten up so he punches Shawn down before firing off some mounted right hands. The ProtoBomb and Shuffle hit but Shawn punches his way out of the FU. Cena is sent into the corner but manages to duck Sweet Chin Music. The referee isn’t so lucky though and is knocked senseless. Cena tries the FU but is countered into a DDT to put both guys down.

With no referee in sight, Shawn rolls to the floor and hits a sick piledriver onto the steps. The THUD when Cena’s head hit was a little scary. The back of Cena’s head is cut open BAD on top of that. Back in and here’s a second referee but the count only gets two. There are the forearm and nip-up as the blood flows down Shawn’s face. The top rope elbow connects but Cena blocks Chin Music with a big clothesline to put both guys down again.

They slug it out in the middle of the ring but the FU is countered again into a sunset flip for two. Shawn’s leap frog is caught in the FU but Cena is too banged up to cover. The very delayed cover gets two and the champ is getting frustrated. With nothing else to do he tries an FU off the top, only to be shoved off by Shawn. Michaels dives at Cena but gets caught in the FU position. He counters that as well though by landing on his feet, only to miss the superkick and have Cena try for the STFU. Cena keeps trying for it but gets small packaged down for two instead.

Shawn misses an enziguri attempt and now the STFU is on. Cena cranks back on it but Shawn is only a few inches away from the rope. As Shawn starts to black out he grabs the rope and Cena has to break. He takes a bit too long though and gets in an argument with the referee, allowing Shawn to kick Cena’s head off. Another delayed cover gets two and both guys are down. In a cool spot, both guys have to lean on the other to get up. The FU is countered again but Shawn can’t avoid the STFU again. Cena cranks back on it and Shawn has no choice but to tap out.

Rating: A-. This was a much better match than the HHH match from the year before for a few reasons. First of all, there was a story behind the match. As simple as it was, Shawn being Cena’s partner gave them a bond and seeing them fight was something interesting to see. Second, the drama was better here. Cena felt like he was in real trouble and that the title was in danger, which I never felt last year. It’s a better match overall and they would have even better ones in the future.

A highlight package ends the show.

Overall Rating: B+. This is a show where the stuff that is bad is really bad but the stuff that is good is REALLY good. There are only eight matches on the card and three of them are very good to great. The best part about that though is the bad matches (other than one) were all short and pretty easy to get through. The show is completely forgettable other than Trump vs. Vince and maybe Undertaker vs. Batista, but it’s worth seeing. I would however recommend fast forwarding through some of the weaker parts.

Ratings Comparison

CM Punk vs. Mr. Kennedy vs. Finlay vs. Randy Orton vs. King Booker vs. Jeff Hardy vs. Booker T vs. Edge

Original: B+

Redo: B

Great Khali vs. Kane

Original: D

Redo: D-

Chris Benoit vs. MVP

Original: B

Redo: C

Undertaker vs. Batista

Original: B+

Redo: A

ECW Originals vs. New Breed

Original: D+

Redo: D

Bobby Lashley vs. Umaga

Original: C-

Redo: D

Melina vs. Ashley

Original: F

Redo: M (for Mickie James)

John Cena vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: A

Redo: A-

Overall Rating

Original: B

Redo: B+

Almost everything goes down and the rating goes up. I’m a complex guy sometimes.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/30/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-23-over-80000-people/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania XXIII (Original): That Just Looks Cool

Wrestlemania 23
Date: April 1, 2007
Location: Ford Field, Detroit, Michigan
Attendance: 80,103
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield
America The Beautiful: Aretha Franklin

After reading the card, the idea that I get is there are a lot of similarities between this year’s show and last year’s. The show is pretty packed, there’s adequate filler, the titles are defended, it’s got a huge crowd (second biggest ever) and it looks like a big show. However, as I remember it, it just doesn’t feel like a great Mania. I have reasons for thinking that which I’ll get into at the end, but for now let’s just see how this goes. Your main difference here is that ECW is now a part of the WWE.

After the standard Mania opening video package which is well done here, complete with someone is a dead ringer for James Earl Jones’ voice, JR and Lawler welcome us and the Smackdown commentators to the show. JBL really does have talent at the announce table. Aretha Franklin must weigh nearly 300lbs. As we should start off with, our first match is this.

Money in the Bank: Matt Hardy vs. Finlay vs. Randy Orton vs. Edge vs. Jeff Hardy vs. Mr. Kennedy vs. CM Punk vs. King Booker

I never got why they put so many people in these things. Having six or even four would make it MUCH better and you could spare some people for midcard matches. The arena looks incredible. The entrances take forever to get through so we’re going to be at about 12 minutes into the show when the first match starts. Kennedy does the Mic Drop. Big reactions for both Hardys.Everyone kind of stands around to start until Kennedy finally goes for a ladder. I never would have pegged him as the smart one.

Finlay of all people does the big dive to start the match. Edge almost gets up the ladder 90 seconds in but Matt makes the save. Orton and Finlay both go up but Jeff makes the save. You can’t say they’re not flying through this.Kennedy stops Hardy as Booker pulls out a stepladder by mistake in a funny bit. Edge picks up said stepladder and PELTS THAT THING at Punk’s head. Edge sets up the ladder as a bridge between the apron and the railing as I think I know what’s coming. Orton vs. Booker in the ring at the moment. Booker clears the ring and stops for a Spinarooni, allowing Edge and the Hardys to come in and stop him.

Edge suplexes Matt onto a ladder which I think breaks another one underneath it. In a SICK looking spot, Kennedy goes up for the Kenton Bomb onto Matt on the ladder but misses and the back of his head smacks the ladder. FREAKING OW MAN! Jeff throws in a Swanton as punishment for move infringement. Matt and Jeff go up and hammer on each other for a bit but Finlay shoves them both off.

Edge cleans house with about seven spears in a row but Punk makes the stop. Unfortunately there’s no ladder. Once he finds one though he busts out the Terry Funk Ladder Spin in a nice ECW homage (he was ECW at this point mind you). Edge busts out the BIG LADDER but Orton is shoved down. He walks into a Gordbuster by Jeff as we set up the huge spot of the match.Matt puts Edge on the ladder between the ring and the apron as Jeff goes up the big one. Instead of grabbing the case (JBL: GRAB THE CASE YOU CRAZY FREAK!) he dives off the ladder onto Edge, snapping the ladder right down the middle. INSANE spot and Edge is stretchered out which makes the flow of the match far better.

Everything more or less stops for a bit to take Edge out which is certainly understandable. Orton RKOs everyone in sight but Punk makes the save. RKO off the ladder ends Punk though as they just left Hardy laying there which is kind of funny in a sick way. Booker gets a Bookend off the ladder to Orton as everyone is down again.

Booker and Matt go up but Sharmell grabs Matt’s leg. Matt fights her off and threatens the Twist of Fate on her if Booker grabs the case in a creative move. Finlay’s head is busted BAD. Matt takes a Celtic Cross onto the ladder. Finlay’s back is too messed up to climb so here’s Horny to climb up and get the case for Finlay. Kennedy goes up and we get a Green Bay Plunge off the ladder on the midget.

Finlay is all like screw that and blasts Kennedy in the face with a ladder. In the words of Heenan: I told him not to touch that midget. Punk dropkicks the ladder to stop Finlay from going up. Kennedy vs. Punk on the ladder and down goes the blonde. Kennedy grabs a ladder and uses it like a javelin to mostly kill Punk and climbs up to get the ladder and end this.

Rating: B+. It’s not as good as the first MITB but it’s better than last year. The extra time helps a lot here but the ending is still relatively weak. Kennedy just climbs up the ladder to win the match. It’s fun, but it’s not mind blowing. It’s really a mess, and there’s nothing wrong with that as it got the crowd going like almost nothing else was going to.

Kennedy would of course get hurt and lose this shot to Edge who would use it to steal the title from the Undertaker. The Hardy/Edge ladder spot is absolutely insane and one of the sickest things I’ve ever seen. Kennedy says that he’s coming for the title. This makes me laugh.

Kane vs. Great Khali

Here’s your backstory: Khali was dominating Smackdown and said he wanted better competition. Kane accepted his offer and here we are. Kane looks absolutely tiny compared to Khali here and it’s almost scary. This is the big man battle and something tells me it’s not going to be very good. Oh and it’s inter-promotional.

I think you get the idea of what’s coming here. King says Khali is scarier than Andre which is again an eye rolling line. Lillian is looking AMAZING in a little blue dress. Khali dominates to start and continues to do so for awhile. Kane hammers away but it isn’t enough to get him anywhere. They’re using the big on big formula which isn’t very effective but what else can they do here?

And we hit the nerve hold as apparently a minute and a half is too long before we need a rest hold. King goes on about how awesome Khali is. He really is scary in person but he’s got nothing on Andre. JR calls Khali’s offense bowling shoe ugly. Preach it brother. Lawler calls him ugly in general.

Kane never can really get going here including not even putting Khali down with the clothesline. Khali gets tied up in the ropes and the beating is on. Kane is in trouble but he uses the meathook from his movie to get an advantage before slamming Khali which is the only thing here that actually gets the crowd awake.

The whole place is dead until then but soon thereafter Kane looks for a chokeslam but Khali counters with his two handed chokeslam to win. Afterwards he chokes Kane out with the rope from his hook. Nice thing to see there: attempted manslaughter with a deadly weapon. All hail the PG Era!

Rating: D. Short and bad usually makes a match better, but this was just flat out boring to me. The slam is all that’s keeping it from an F as neither of them were able to really get anything going here. Not a great match at all, but it did have one very cool moment in it. They went for a recreation of the Andre Slam but it just didn’t work at all.

Eugene is sad about being bald so Cryme Tyme helps him out by finding Kelly, Layla and Brooke. This leads to a dance party with a ton of HOFers and Legends. Ricky Steamboat, in full karate gear, pops up to stare everyone down but dances too resulting in the Ron Simmons catchphrase. Fun stuff of course.

United States Title: Chris Benoit vs. MVP

MVP comes out with cheerleaders as he’s the full on jerk here. I could get behind that, not the nice guy he turned into though. It never worked for me in the slightest which this was rather entertaining more often than not. He’s the brash young rookie and Benoit is, well he’s Chris Benoit and the US Champion. I think that sums this up pretty well. Basic story is MVP wanted a shot and Benoit said ok.

Benoit takes it to the match but MVP actually counters him in a nice move. MVP puts Benoit down and shouts FIRST DOWN in a cool bit. Benoit goes for the Sharpshooter but puts the leg in the wrong way for some reason. Crossface is countered and Benoit’s lip is busted. MVP works on the arm which takes away the Crossface which makes sense.

The referee says six minutes rather loudly which always makes me chuckle for some reason. Benoit busts out the Germans but MVP gets up to stop the headbutt from coming off the top. Superplex has Benoit in trouble as it gets two. Benoit’s arm hits the post and MVP pounces like a crazed Benoit. Wait that’s an oxymoron. He pounces like a Benoit and works the arm hard.

In a nice sequence, Benoit holds the rope to avoid a big boot but when he comes in MVP hits the boot anyway. I liked that. Crossface is attempted but MVP hammers the arm and Benoit can’t hook it. Pretty good stuff so far. Ballin, which is called Count It here gets two. Big boot in the corner misses and here come the Germans again.

More Germans come in as you would think this is happening in France. There’s the headbutt…and it gets the pin? They didn’t even use the full six minutes. The ending kind of came out of nowhere but it worked for the most part as the Crossface would have been a headscratcher here.

Rating: B. The ending is what ruins this for me. It’s like they were cut off mid match and it really hurt them. Other than that, this was great stuff. MVP surprised me here and would go on to beat Benoit in two straight falls to win the title at Backlash. Give this another three minutes or so and it’s great stuff indeed.

Trump runs into the Boogeyman and seemingly couldn’t care less.

Hall of Fame class is presented. This one was kind of weak as the main people were JR, the King and Dusty Rhodes. Not terrible at all but there wasn’t a big name in it, much like the first of the new round of classes.

Recap of Batista vs. Taker. The idea here is simple: Taker won the Rumble and picked Batista. This was a pretty big buildup at the time and it worked quite well I thought. The best part about this match is it marked the end of the really annoying tag team main events at No Way Out.

All it would be was the Smackdown main event teaming up with the Raw main event in a tag match with one “turning” but not getting booed. This year, Batista made the “turn” and once again, no one cared. Also, this should have been the main event. Taker in a title match at Mania is something special.

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. Undertaker

Taker gets the full on entrance here complete with lightning, thunder, smoke and druids holding fire. A poll says that there’s an 80% fan vote that Taker wins the title here. And people say WWE fans aren’t smart. The entrances and buildup took nearly 15 minutes in total for this. Spear by Batista IMMEDIATELY but Taker throws him into the corner as we’re on hard and fast.

They slug it out on the floor and Taker eats steps with his knees. That must be incredibly awkward at dinner. Batista goes up top and comes off with a shoulder block for two. They’re going all big and hard here and it’s awesome so far. Taker punches up from his knees and it’s Boo/Yay time. Snake Eyes and the big boot combination put Batista down for two.

Old School connects but Batista blocks the chokeslam to HUGE heat. Taker beats him back and hits the apron legdrop for a nice reaction. BIG Taker Dive has Batista reeling. We stay on the floor and Batista reverses to send Taker into the timekeeper’s table. We enter Spanish Land with JBL and Cole having to get out of the way as Batista gets a powerslam through the table.

White heat on Batista as he rolls Taker in for two. Batista Bomb is blocked to a sweet reaction. Belly to belly by Batista gets two. We go Mania X-7 as Taker gets the Last Ride out of the corner to counter the ten punches. It’s really just a powerbomb but it worked fine. Naturally that only gets two as this is pretty solid stuff so far.

Spinebuster hits but Taker is like forget that and sits up. Chokeslam gets two as the fans are COMPLETELY behind Taker. Bad spear by Batista shifts momentum again. Batista Bomb gets two as the fans are scared to death at this point. Another Bomb is blocked and because Batista is STUPID he goes for a Tombstone. Taker is all like boy please and the REAL Tombstone makes Taker 15-0.

Rating: B+. This match was solid to me. There’s no real botches other than arguably the Last Ride which you can attribute to a few things: Batista’s size, Taker being spent, the speed he pulls it off in etc. Although to be fair, it wasn’t like it looked terrible. It was just a regular powerbomb.

This is probably Batista’s best match ever. Taker put on quite a performance as well, just like he does every year here. The only thing I didn’t like was the ending, which while it wasn’t as bad as Benoit/MVP, it wasn’t the best. Either way, definitely a good match and I was entertained the whole time.

This was two guys out there throwing bombs at each other and while it’s not quite as good as some of their later matches, this was a war with both guys working hard the whole time. The crowd was awesome the whole time too as they let Batista know they didn’t like him at all and there’s not a thing wrong with that. Good stuff indeed.

Stephanie and the next generation of McMahon are in the back with Vince. Nothing of note, although there’s a camera in the stroller of course.

Sandman/Rob Van Dam/Tommy Dreamer/Sabu vs. Elijah Burke/Marcus Cor Von/Matt Striker/Kevin Thorn

This one really makes me scratch my head. Why in the world is this not a No DQ match? They had that next month at Backlash, so why not here? It would make so much more sense for this to be one of those, rather than just an 8 man tag. That ECW song never gets old to me. Standard old vs. new thing here. ECW guys are wrestling at Wrestlemania. How weird does that sound?

Burke is now more commonly known as D’Angelo Dinero and collectively they’re known as the New Breed. Striker as a wrestler is just odd indeed. Striker vs. Sabu starts us off here. Sabu totally misses a springboard clothesline for two anyway. Sandman goes up and hits a legdrop across the back of Striker as he’s laid out over the top rope.

Cor Von (Monty Brown) in now as they’re tagging in and out very fast. Dreamer plays the face in peril and gets the tar beaten out of him of course. Big back drop by Burke and Cor Von sets up the double knees in the back of Dreamer by Burke. Sitout powerbomb by Thorn gets two as Sabu makes the save.

Double tags, one to RVD and the other to Striker. That’s just amusing given what we know now. Sabu dives over the top to take out Cor Von and lands on his head. Dreamer plants Striker and with everyone else down, the Five Star ends Striker with ease.

Rating: D+. This was there and that’s about all I can say about it. Again, why in the world was this not a hardcore match or a weapons match? Joey freaks about the ECW guys winning at Mania, which is so against what they stood for originally that it’s not even funny. Kind of a cool moment though I guess.

Recap of the Battle of the Millionaires. This is your real main event but it’s not for the wrestling. The reason this show got the ratings that it got was Donald Trump possibly getting his head shaved. As I’ve mentioned before, Trump must really like wrestling given this is his 4th appearance at Mania.

There’s a big problem with this match: Lashley was as big of a lock to win as anyone could ever believe. He was being pushed to the moon, Umaga never won a really big match yet and there was no way Trump was getting shaved, which no one actually thought would happen.

Austin is your guest referee as he has to be at Mania. This is what he should be. He gets the big pop and is still viewed as a tough guy. I like these appearances but few others do. Anyway, the idea is that each billionaire picks a guy and they have a match. The losing rich guy gets his head shaved.

Bobby Lashley vs. Umaga

The entrances literally take over ten minutes as Vince, Umaga, Trump, Lashley and Austin all have their own entrances. Right off the bat, this match looks boring. Shockingly enough, I’m right. Trump has real $100 bills rain from the ceiling which is pretty awesome. Lashley is ECW Champion here and Umaga is IC Champion here but that doesn’t mean anything.

Ross points out that Umaga has no amateur background. Gee you think? Austin breaks something up for Lashley and the darker skinned dude doesn’t take kindly to it at all. Middle rope shoulder block puts the Samoan down. Umaga gets a foot under the rope and Lashley isn’t thrilled with it being broken up. He kills Estrada to vent some frustration.

Umaga misses a charge and hits the floor with a big old thud. Ross and Lawler calling wrestling is just…right. A few seconds after Umaga hits the floor, Lashley does the exact same thing, crashing out on the outside which I’d assume will set up Umaga’s dominance which I’d assume will include a nerve hold. Big splash gets two for Umaga.

Points to Trump for being INTO this. He’s cheering for Lashley and is clearly interested in what’s going on. Have to give him that: the guy is at least acting like he wants to be there which is a lot more than you can say about some celebrities at Mania. Umaga chokes on the ropes and Austin pulls him away by the hair. Can’t beat a tough referee. Ok you can but you get the idea.

Samoan Drop hits as it’s all Umaga here. Vince’s eyes are sparkling. Lashley gets some punches in but can’t slam Umaga. I guess he’s no Hogan. Lashley sends Vince down by mistake. No wonder he got fired. Bobby manages to slam Umaga off the top and both guys are down. Austin counts but gets to 9 and just doesn’t count them out.

Shane comes out to help Vince up and hangs out at ringside. Austin pulls Umaga off again, this time by the eye. Samoan Spike to Austin and the evil smile on Vince’s face for that is just awesome to see. Shane gets in and hammers on Bobby for a little bit. Vince busts out some garbage cans because what’s wrestling without garbage cans?

The garbage can is set up in front of Lashley’s face and the Van Terminator hits. Shane pulls his shirt off and has a referee’s shirt on underneath of it. A top rope splash kills Lashley but Austin makes the save. Umaga puts him down again and Trump isn’t sure what to do. Vince yells at Austin and TRUMP CLOTHESLINES VINCE! HOKEY FREAKING SMOKE! Umaga goes after Austin again but a Stunner takes him down and a spear from Lashley ends Vince’s hair.

Rating: C-. This was just a match really with nothing at all special going on in it. Make no mistake about it though: this is why Mania 23 was a success. This was HUGE and having Austin thrown in there helped a lot. Austin screwing over Vince is just right. This wasn’t anything great but it was fun and that’s what matters.

We get the head shaving thing which goes on for a good ten minutes. Vince glaring at Austin the whole time is just great. They really do shave the whole thing off too and Vince is bald. Austin stuns Trump as again this guy earns respect from fans.

Ad for Backlash.

Ready for your pointless filler?

We look at the dark match of all things which was a lumberjack tag match with Flair/Carlito vs. Chavo/Gregory Helms with Carlito pinning Chavo off the Backstabber. Is there a reason we’re watching this?

Women’s Title: Melina vs. Ashley

It’s a lumberjill match. Well at least we can look at the girls. You can tell they’re trying to fill time as they list off every one of the girls. Ashley is the Playboy chick of the year which is the only reason she’s here. Let the sloppiness begin. You can tell the fans are mostly not caring here.

Melina gets a surfboard as the crowd is just DEAD. When you can’t get fans excited over a ton of hot women you know you’re in trouble. Ashley is just horrid in the ring and everyone knows it. She misses a horrible looking elbow off the top and is covered for two and ZERO heat at all. A rollup keeps the title on Melina.

Rating: F. This was terrible and a waste of match time.

There’s a big brawl with all the girls post match.

The fans favor Cena 59-41.

We recap Cena vs. Shawn which is happening because Shawn won a triple threat match against Orton and Edge. They play up the old vs. new thing here which is fine. The start of the video is music playing very lightly in the background with no lyrics against video of the two of them. They change that at the end and switch it up to a more traditional package but it worked rather well for a big buildup video.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Shawn Michaels

This should be awesome. Shawn comes out to the DX music which isn’t right for the main event of Wrestlemania, period. Oh Shawn and Cena are tag champions here. I forgot about that and it means jack here. Thankfully Shawn doesn’t wear the title belt to the ring as it would look so painfully out of place. The fans boo Cena as soon as Shawn’s music ends so you know what to expect.

Cena’s awesome entrance this time: a Mustang is shown driving around Detroit and into the arena. The booing when Cena’s music hits as he gets out is epic. Shawn sits on the top rope all calm and cool which is very Shawn of him. Shawn offers a handshake but slaps Cena instead and it’s on. Crotch chop for Cena.

Shawn wins the opening strike off and puts Cena down with a chop. Shawn controls for the most part and speeds things up so Cena takes his head off with a clothesline. Can’t beat that at times. Shawn is starting to get all ticked off here which means this is about to start getting good. A hiptoss sends Cena to the floor and it’s almost all Shawn.

Enziguri has Cena reeling. Shawn hits the ring and lands an Asai Moonsault onto Cena and onto the table which is AMERICAN so it doesn’t break. I think this legitimately hurt Michaels’ ribs but I’ve heard different stories on that. Cena gets the skin peeled off his chest with chops. A shot to Cena’s knee has another part of the champion hurting.

Things slow down a bit here as Shawn talks to Cena in a way we’re supposed to see I think. Cena gets a big punch in but Shawn throws a shoulder to keep Cena in the corner. Shawn charges again but his head eats turnbuckle (George Steele did it better) and he’s busted open. Ah ok the replay shows that it was the post which makes more sense.

Cena gets some mounted shots to SOLID heat. Superkick misses and down goes the referee. He has a bad habit of doing that at Mania. There is blood all over Cena’s shoulder. FU is countered into a DDT for no cover since the referee is out cold still. Shawn hits the floor and unhooks the steps. How are we just barely over halfway through with this?

Somehow that only gets two as another referee comes out. Shawn busts out the forearm, the nipup and the elbow. It’s time to tune up the band but Cena gets a clothesline out of desperation to make the stop. FU is reversed. Might have worked better if Cena hadn’t stopped to turn to the camera. I wonder if that’s Shawn’s blood or Cena’s blood on the top of John’s head.

FU hits on the second attempt and Shawn is in big trouble. That only gets two but you would think the Lions just made the Super Bowl. The only difference is that this was possible. Cena sets for the FU off the middle rope but Shawn fights him off and gets a cross body. Cena catches him and rolls through into the FU but Shawn counters and looks for Chin Music. Cena ducks with a drop toe hold but Shawn counters THAT into a small package for two. Great sequence.

Enziguri misses and STFU is locked on. A rope is grabbed and Cena yells at the referee. BIGGEST CHIN MUSIC EVER takes Cena’s head off but Shawn can’t cover in time and it only gets two. Double count gets us to nine and Shawn swings away but the champ counters into the STFU again and Shawn can’t get out this time and Detroit all wants to cry as Cena retains.

Rating: A. Great match. Cena can turn it on in the big matches like few others can. Shawn is one of those few that can turn it on even better though and he certainly did here. They beat the tar out of each other with both guys working incredibly hard out there to show off for the huge crowd. Cena has made both members of DX tap in consecutive Manias. How many people can say that? The leg injury disappearing holds this back a bit, but great match either way.

Overall Rating: B. This is a solid show but it’s not great for some reason. There’s just a little something stopping it and I’m not sure what it is. I think that part of it is the main event. It’s a great match, but the problem is that once it’s done things are exactly as they were before.

The Battle of the Billionaires was good but it could have been so much more. The show is worth seeing but there are far better ones out there. See the main event for sure and Batista vs. Taker is worth seeing too. Good show overall, but just a step behind the great ones.

 

 

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Smackdown – August 18, 2006: How Bamboozling

Smackdown
Date: August 18, 2006
Location: Verizon Center, Washington DC
Attendance: 8,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the go home show for Summerslam and that means it’s time to take one of the biggest matches from that show and move it here. This time around it’s Great Khali vs. Undertaker in a Last Man Standing match, as Khali might not be trustworthy to put in the ring on live television for more than about two minutes flat. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening recap looks at Undertaker vs. Great Khali, which does not exactly scream all time great and original feud.

Opening sequence.

Batista vs. Sylvan

Batista is the hometown boy and finishes with his namesake Bomb in less than a minute.

Video on the Diva Search finals from earlier this week in New York City, where Layla won. Given that she clearly had more charisma than anyone else in the competition, this shouldn’t be surprising.

MVP, surrounded by a group of women, are watching from a sky box.

Scotty 2 Hotty vs. Sylvester Terkay

Terkay has Elijah Burke with him and sends Scotty to the apron to start. A big boot knocks Scotty to the floor and Burke throws him back inside. Back in and Terkay grabs a standing head and arm choke, setting up a belly to belly. Hold on though as we need to pause for some water for Terkay. It seems to help as a Muscle Buster finishes Scotty.

Rating: C-. I’m never sure what to say about something like this as Terkay looked like a monster, though the match itself was a complete squash. Terkay is looking like a monster, though he isn’t the most charismatic guy in the world. Hopefully Burke can help move that forward and they are off to a pretty decent start.

We get a video on the history between Rey Mysterio and Eddie Guerrero, at least the good part of it.

Paul London and Brian Kendrick love the idea of competition but get jumped by KC James and Idol Stevens, the team who beat them last week.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Tatanka

Kennedy talks trash to start (duh) so Tatanka starts cranking on the arm. Said arm is sent into the corner and a chop puts Kennedy on the floor. Back in and Tatanka takes out the knee, followed by a hard clothesline. Kennedy is back up with some stomps in the corner before working on Tatanka’s leg, complete with mocking the war cry like a real villain. Tatanka fights up and sends him into the corner, followed by a clothesline but the knee gives out. The Papoose To Go is loaded up but Kennedy rakes the eyes for the break and rolls him up with trunks for the pin.

Rating: D+. Tatanka continues to be one of the least interesting people in WWE but at least he isn’t winning anything of note. Kennedy continues to gain some momentum, which he is going to need after that long hiatus completely derailed everything. If he can step it up in the ring, they have a potential breakout star on their hands.

Video on Chavo Guerrero’s relationship with Eddie.

Vickie Guerrero begs Teddy Long to cancel Chavo vs. Rey at Summerslam but Teddy can’t do it.

Great Khali vs. Undertaker

Last Man Standing and Khali has Daivari in his corner. Khali chokes him into the corner to start and hits a clothesline (with an awkward camera cut, likely the first of several in this match). Undertaker strikes away but gets kicked out to the floor, with Khali sending him into the steps. Some right hands from the floor rock Khali though and a Stunner over the ropes make it worse.

There’s the apron legdrop into a triangle choke (from the side) but Undertaker lets go with Khali still moving. Daivari’s chair shot just annoys Undertaker, who stalks Daivari to the stage. Khali follows and the distraction lets Daivari hit a low blow. Undertaker fights out of a chokeslam but has to boot Daivari down, allowing Khali to throw Undertaker off the stage. That’s good for a nine and we take a break.

Back with Khali beating on Undertaker near the stage before taking it inside again. Khali strikes away and ties his arms in the ropes, setting up the big chop to knock Undertaker silly. Granted it takes a bit to get his arms out of the ropes so the count can begin, but Undertaker sits up at nine anyway. A running clothesline puts Khali on the floor, where he whips Undertaker into the steps.

Back in again and Undertaker hits him in the face with the steps, followed by a chair to the back to drive Khali face first into the steps. Khali is busted open and another chair shot knocks him down again. Undertaker starts going after the knee and some chairs to the head sets up the chokeslam (there’s that edit again) and Khali is done.

Rating: D+. The match wasn’t great or even very good by any means, but this could have been miles worse. Granted I’m sure there was a ton of editing to make it work as well as it did, but they could have done far worse. Undertaker winning in the end was the right move as Khali got his big win at Judgment Day and will be fine going forward. Plus it completes the same formula from the Giant Gonzalez feud in 1993.

Boogeyman is back and JBL panics.

Summerslam rundown.

Vito vs. Scott Fowler

Vito puts the dress over Fowler’s head to start, dances, and drops a leg. The headlock on the mat goes on, followed by Vito flipping the dress up and down. JBL screams and it’s the Implant DDT into the armbar for the win. JBL: “AND THE LOSER IS ME!!! HIS NIPPLES ARE SHOWING!!!”

US Title: Bobby Lashley vs. Finlay

Finlay is defending. Feeling out process to start with Lashley backing him into the ropes and knocking the champ out to the floor. Back in and Lashley hammers away but Finlay claims a poke to the eye. That’s just faking of course, allowing Finlay to hammer away. Lashley can’t see but he’s fine enough to hit a gorilla press gutbuster for two. Cue William Regal to ringside for a distraction, allowing Finlay to post Lashley and we take a break.

Back with Finlay holding a chinlock and then posting Lashley again. Finlay works on an armbar but Lashley powers up and hits a belly to belly. The one armed delayed vertical suplex (JBL: “Haven’t seen that since Rick Rude.”) but Regal gets up for a distraction. Cue the Leprechaun so Finlay picks him up, only to have Lashley spear them both down (JBL: “YOU CAN’T SPEAR A LEPRECHAUN!”). The running powerslam hits Lashley but Regal pulls the referee for the DQ.

Rating: C. They were getting to the next level by the end and there was so much going on that you felt they could do a title change. I get why they didn’t want to go there with the ending though and odds are we get the big blowoff match between some combination of these three on a special Smackdown. Lashley needs something else to do though and I don’t think the US Title is going to mean much to him at this point. He’s in a weird place where he needs to move up but there isn’t much room for him with Batista back.

Lashley cleans house post match.

Here are King Booker and Queen Sharmell in the throne on the ring for the big close. Booker knows that Batista is coming for the title that he lost when he forfeited the title due to a small injury. Batista has no heart, passion or intestinal fortitude though, nor does he have any idea what King Booker is all about. Batista has BAMBOOZLED you people and now he has run amuck.

Now Booker has to beat Batista to a pulp, but there is an option B, which Batista can find out if he comes to the ring right now. Cue Batista, with Booker saying that option B is Batista kneel down and kiss the royal feet. Booker even has a royal foot pillow for the occasion. The shoe comes off and Batista leans forward before stepping on the bare toes. Batista puts on the robe to end the show. This was perfectly acceptable for a quick final push toward the World Title match.

Overall Rating: C-. This was a weird one as they had a Summerslam level match on the Summerslam go home show, but they also did their usual lower card drek along with the Summerslam push. What we got here wasn’t the worst, but it was a strange mixture of a lot of things. As usual, the top level stuff is good enough, but the stuff underneath is just hard to sit through most weeks. It’s not an awful show and Summerslam looks ok enough. The problem is that was the case coming into this show and much like Raw, it didn’t make me want to see the pay per view any more than I already did.

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Great American Bash 2006 (2020 Redo): The Night Of The Evil Enzymes

Great American Bash 2006
Location: Conseco Fieldhouse, Indianapolis, Indiana
Attendance: 9,750
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s time for a Smackdown pay per view and the card is actually pretty stacked. This time around the main event is Rey Mysterio defending the World Title against King Booker, but we also have a Punjabi Prison match between Undertaker and Great Khali, plus the big Batista pay per view return. Let’s get to it.

The opening video talks about how everyone has freedom because of America before switching into a look at the show’s biggest matches. Standard but safe theme.

Tag Team Titles: Brian Kendrick/Paul London vs. Pit Bulls

The Pit Bulls are challenging as JBL goes on a rant about having to sit next to the Spanish commentary team. Kash and London brawl to the mat to start and it’s an early standoff. The rather rough lockup goes on as commentary talks about the famous teams to wrestle at the Great American Bash over the years. Kendrick comes in off the top but gets caught n the corner, with Noble sending him face first into the buckle.

An armbar takes Noble down though and the champs take turns coming off the top and onto Noble’s arm. Noble manages to send London hard into the buckle but London and Kendrick are right back up with stereo suicide dives to the floor. Back in and a double shoulder gets two on Kendrick, meaning it’s time to rake his face. Noble misses a charge though and gets caught in the ropes, setting up the hot tag to London to clean house.

London gets sent over the ropes though and Skinning The Cat is broken up with a hard dropkick to the floor. Back in again and we hit the chinlock with London not even bothering to stay down very long this time. Kash comes in to choke on the ropes but has to dive at London’s legs to cut off the tag.

London kicks him into Noble for the knockdown though, allowing the hot tag to Kendrick. The pace picks up in a hurry as everything breaks down. Kendrick hits some running dropkicks and the big dive to the floor takes Noble out. Back in and Kash can’t hit the Dead Level, allowing Kendrick to try a top rope sunset flip. He can’t get Kash over, so London adds the Dropsault to knock Kash down, giving Kendrick the cradle pin to retain.

Rating: B. This was as good of a choice of an opener as they had with both teams looking pretty awesome and flying all over the ring, which is a great way to start the show. London and Kendrick can do that style all day and the Pit Bulls are able to hang in there just as well. Heck of an opener here, and hopefully something can hang with it tonight.

Great Khali wants to do something but Daivari wants to know why it has to be now. Daivari is promptly lifted up into the air, leaving his feet flailing away.

Here’s Teddy Long to say that Bobby Lashley can’t compete tonight because he has elevated liver enzymes. Cue Lashley to say to say he’s fine and wants to fight tonight. Teddy says he can’t do that because they have to take a long term view of Lashley’s health. When Lashley is healthy though, he can have a title shot.

Lashley walks to the back so here are William Regal and Finlay, who walk around him in a great visual, to talk to Long. Finlay asks Long to lay some skin on him and Regal has a rather wacky handshake. With the hip part out of the way, Finlay doesn’t buy the liver enzymes theory but wants Teddy to name him the winner by forfeit. Not so fast though because Long has another idea.

US Title: Finlay vs. William Regal

Finlay is defending and JBL goes into a great rant about how he and Ron Simmons drank forever but they never had bad livers. Hold on as wants to check underneath the ring for the Leprechaun. Finlay goes after him and gets hit in the face to start fast. They lock up and head to the floor without letting go before walking up the steps and back inside, again without letting go.

Back in and Regal takes him down by the leg but Finlay flips his way to freedom. A hard toss to the floor has Finlay in trouble but cue the Leprechaun to hit Regal in the leg with the Shillelagh. Regal backs into him and runs away screaming, allowing Finlay to start the exchange of uppercuts. Regal gets the better of things but goes after the Leprechaun again, allowing him to bite Regal’s fingers.

Finlay goes for the leg but gets taken down into a chinlock for his efforts. That’s broken up in a hurry so Finlay sits on his ribs, followed by a chinlock of his own. That doesn’t last long either so they run into each other for a double knockdown. It’s Regal up first with a dropkick of all things for two, followed by a knee drop for the same.

The fans call it boring, with Cole trying his darndest to say it’s because they want to see Lashley. Regal gets tied up in the ring skirt and comes up minus a boot, meaning it’s time for Finlay to stomp on his toes like a villain should. The referee is confused so Regal grabs the Shillelagh, only to have the Leprechaun slip in the boot. A shot to the head and a rollup (with feet on the ropes because of course) retains Finlay’s title.

Rating: C+. It wasn’t a classic but calling this boring is quite a bit too extreme. It was a different style and I can understand the fans not getting into it, but boring was too far. These two have probably had a match like this a hundred times (ok maybe minus the Leprechaun) and you could see how much fun they were having.

Post match the Leprechaun steals the title so Finlay has to kick him back underneath the ring.

Chavo Guerrero gives Rey Mysterio a pep talk and brings up Eddie Guerrero a few times. I think you know where this is going.

Gregory Helms vs. Matt Hardy

Non-title and Hardy is replacing Super Crazy, who was also enzymed (Crazy was never announced for the title match but they weren’t hiding it on Smackdown). Matt drives him into the corner and then armdrags him back out as the fans are behind Hardy here. There’s a headlock takeover to the mat but Helms is right back up, only to have Hardy strike the Hurricane pose. Helms gets sent outside and taken out for a dive, which is good for two back inside.

A quick neck snap across the top rope sets up a running neckbreaker for two on Hardy, followed by a regular neckbreaker for the same. The chinlock goes on but Hardy is back up, meaning Helms has to clothesline him right back down. Helms goes up to mock Matt’s yelling elbow, allowing Matt to punch him out of the air (I wonder what gave Matt the hint). Matt hits a Russian legsweep but takes too long loading up a superplex.

The delay lets Helms nail a super swinging neckbreaker for two, as Matt has to put his foot on the rope. Helms changes things up a bit with a double underhook on the mat with some knees to the face, but Matt fights up again with the Side Effect. There’s the running bulldog out of the corner for two but the Twist of Fate is countered into another hard takedown.

Helms’ running enziguri gets two so he takes Matt up top. The superplex is broken up though and Matt nails a moonsault press, followed by the top rope elbow to the head for his own two. With nothing else working, Matt hammers away in the corner but gets dropped face first onto the turnbuckle. Helms grabs the rollup with tights for the pin.

Rating: C+. This worked out well, which isn’t surprising given how well they know each other. Matt wasn’t the most logical replacement, but he’s a lot more interesting than Super Crazy or Psicosis. It would be nice to have had the title on the line, but it’s not like the thing has meant anything in….years really.

Khali is heading towards the ring and doesn’t want to hear from Daivari. Cue Undertaker to throw Daivari aside and go after Khali, only to have Big Show pop up to jump Undertaker. The beatdown is on until referees come in to get rid of the giants.

We recap Great Khali vs. Undertaker. Khali destroyed Undertaker at Judgment Day but now Undertaker is back to fight him in the huge rematch. We’ll throw it in the Punjabi Prison, which hasn’t actually been explained coming into the match. On the way here, Undertaker has had to deal with Big Show and Khali, who have beaten him up more than once.

Daivari, Big Show and Khali run into Teddy Long, who puts Show into the Punjabi Prison instead. Why? No reason given, meaning JBL’s rant about how unfair this is makes sense. And yes, Khali was enzymed as well.

Big Show vs. Undertaker

Non-title and inside the Punjabi Prison. The ring is surrounded by a bamboo cage, but then there is another around the ring to keep them locked up even more than usual. The inner cage has four doors which can be opened, but only for one minute each for the entire match. Once they are locked back, they cannot be opened again, though you can still climb over. There are spikes over the top of the outer wall to prevent anyone from escaping. However, you have to escape that one as well, with the first one escaping to the outside winning.

Show goes after him to start and pounds Undertaker down in the corner, meaning the TAKER chants start up in a hurry. Undertaker strikes away but gets knocked into the cage wall for his efforts. Show charges into a boot though and it’s time to start kicking away at the leg. That’s enough to let Undertaker climb but he gets cut off by the spikes. The delay lets Show catch him on top and drive him into the corner, followed by a hard running clothesline.

Back up and Undertaker sends him into the wall, setting up the running hip attack to knock Show into the cage again. Show grabs a chokeslam attempt, only to get DDTed down. Undertaker asks for the first door to be opened but Show beats him down until the clock runs out. With Undertaker down, Show pulls one of the straps off of the wall (because there are leather straps on the wall). Instead of using it though, Show pulls the turnbuckle pad off, allowing Undertaker to strike away.

The jumping clothesline drops Show and Old School connects, only to have Show knock him down again. The second door is opened, with Undertaker cutting Show off just like Show did to him. That’s enough for the clock to run out so Show hits Undertaker in the face to draw some blood. Show pounds away at the cut before going up, only to get caught with a low blow. The superplex brings Show back down and Undertaker is able to get through the third door.

That door closes so Show goes out of the fourth and catches Undertaker climbing the outer cage. For some reason JBL calls this Undertaker being done and seeing his legend end. I’d guess because he’s kind of into hyperbole. Show gets smart (oh dear) by throwing Undertaker back inside the inner cage before time expires. Undertaker is fine enough to climb the inner cage and step over to the outer one, making that whole RAZOR SHARP SPIKE deal seem pretty stupid.

Show pulls him back down, so Undertaker lays him out again and drops a leg. Now Show is busted open as well and appears to be near tears. Cue Daivari and Khali through the crowd as Undertaker climbs the inner structure and dives onto Show, sending them through the cage. Undertaker falls outside first and that’s enough for the win, meaning JBL suddenly remembers Undertaker is AWESOME.

Rating: D. They were held down by the last minute change here as this would have been better suited for Khali, but sweet goodness imagine how bad he would have been in this thing. The problem is that Undertaker and Big Show do not have the best matches under normal circumstances and this was a messy version of the cage match. I don’t dislike the idea, but they got too complicated for their own good here and it hurt things a lot. That and there is only so much you can do in a rather crazy match like this one.

Sharmell says Booker can become King of the World if he wins tonight. Booker’s accent gets stronger and stronger every week.

Kristal vs. Michelle McCool vs. Ashley vs. Jillian Hall

Bra and panties and the first woman to strip someone else wins. The double catfight is on to start with Jillian chasing Michelle around the ring. That leaves Kristal to take Ashley top off but Michelle comes in. Jillian jumps her but Kristal ties Jillian in the Tree of Woe. That lets Michelle rip the top off as JBL laughs at Cole for talking about the athletic ability. Ashley and Jillian rip the skirts off of Michelle and Kristal but Michelle has a second skirt on for protection. Jillian is back up and jiggles a lot before shoving Kristal’s face into her chest. With Jillian grabbing Kristal’s legs, Ashley rips Kristal’s top off for the win.

Rating: D. I think you get the idea here and they served their purpose well. There was almost nothing resembling wrestling in the whole thing and that is completely understandable. Watching this was a lot easier than watching them try to have a match, but it was pure eye candy and filler after the big match. Just more of the same from the Smackdown women.

Post match Ashley and Jillian de-pants each other. JBL: “WHERE’S THE HOT TUB??? SOMEBODY GET MISS TEXAS AND MY BLACK AMERICAN EXPRESS!”

Miz interviews Mr. Kennedy, who thinks it’s impressive that Batista is getting in the ring with him. Mark Henry didn’t get to beat Batista but Kennedy will. Miz loves the double “KENNEDY” line. It’s hard to fathom that Miz would blow away Kennedy’s accomplishments but that’s wrestling for you.

Batista vs. Mr. Kennedy

This was billed as a #1 contenders match on Smackdown but there is no mention of it here. Batista jumps him from behind so Kennedy pokes him in the eye to get away. That just makes Batista knock him to the floor, with Kennedy being busted open early off a ram into the steps. Some right hands don’t do much to Batista but his right hands send Kennedy (who is rather bloody) bailing.

The head fake doesn’t work though as Batista spears him down, only to have Kennedy get in another cheap shot. Some shots to the face and a clothesline put Batista down and there’s a running boot in the corner. Kennedy takes it outside for a ram into the steps and puts on an armbar back inside. Since it’s an armbar, Batista is right back up to send Kennedy shoulder first into the post. Batista chokes in the corner long enough for the DQ.

Rating: D+. They started well (that blood looked good) but then it turned into Kennedy having nothing to hang with Batista. This felt like the kind of match you put Batista in to make it clear that he was on the show and nothing more. The match didn’t make Batista look good and Kennedy was busted open and beaten down by the end, leaving this as just ok at best. That being said, it’s another case where they had no reason to be fighting so they did what they could here.

We recap King Booker vs. Rey Mysterio. Booker won the King of the Ring to gain the crown and went a bit nuts as a result. He has the King’s Court helping him though and won a battle royal to become #1 contender. Mysterio’s title reign is still a complete mess and it seems to be a matter of time before he finally drops the thing to anyone else. This gets the music video treatment.

Smackdown World Title: King Booker vs. Rey Mysterio

Mysterio is defending and Booker, with Sharmell, rides out on a throne. They take their sweet time with the entrances here and it feels like they’re filling in time. Cole calls Mysterio a great American and JBL is just done with him, going into a crazed rant about how horrible Mysterio is. Feeling out process to start with Booker kicking him down and unloading with chops in the corner. Rey is right back with a knockdown of his own and a running legdrop gets one.

Commentary is in an argument over socialism as Booker elbows him in the face and grabbing a hammerlock. A flying mare gets Rey out of trouble but Booker takes him back into the corner for some right hands. Booker misses a charge into the post though and the top rope seated senton to the floor puts him down. Back in and the springboard splash gets two on Booker, who is right back with a sidekick for a near fall of his own. Sharmell even gets in a rake to the eyes to keep Rey in trouble and Booker adds another kick to the face.

The armbar still doesn’t work though and Booker has to send him into the corner to cut off a comeback attempt. Booker goes evil with the Three Amigos but misses the ax kick. It’s too early for a 619 so Rey tries it again, only to be tripped by Sharmell. That’s enough for an ejection so Booker hits a clothesline for two. Booker goes to the middle rope to dive into the raised boots and they’re both down, with Booker holding his knee.

A pop up hurricanrana sets up the springboard spinning crossbody for two on Booker. Rey hits a DDT for the same but the referee gets bumped. The springboard seated senton sets up the 619 into the frog splash but there is no referee. Booker uses the chance to hit a blow blow and the Book End, allowing him to grab a chair. Rey dropkicks it into his face so here’s Chavo Guerrero with his own chair….to knock Mysterio silly. The referee is back in and Booker steals the title.

Rating: C+. It was a good midcard match but this didn’t feel like a World Title pay per view main event. That being said, there was zero reason to consider keeping the title on Mysterio at this point and Booker was the best choice to take the title. Granted I would hope that they could come up with something more interesting than Chavo Guerrero to get rid of him, but the ending was the right call.

A lot of ALL HAIL KING BOOKER’s and some tears take us out.

Overall Rating: C-. This show started off well and then collapsed in a hurry. As usual, it’s a brand exclusive B show so there is only so much that you can get out of the whole thing. Then when you factor in the amount of changes that had to be made due to the enzymes, the show was running with a big anchor. It could have been a lot worse, but thank goodness those early matches were as solid as they were or this could have been in serious trouble.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Saturday Night’s Main Event #33 (2020 Redo): And It’s Over

Saturday Night’s Main Event #33
Date: July 15, 2006
Location: American Airlines Center, Dallas, Texas
Attendance: 17,343
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s time for another special, which is really code for a commercial for the Great American Bash and ultimately Summerslam. These shows don’t mean much in the days of Raw and Smackdown, but there is something about that name that makes it feel special. It helps that the card is fairly stacked so hopefully it works out. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Here are Hulk Hogan and his daughter Brooke (Lawler approves) to open things up. Brooke says it has always been her dream to be here with her dad. Hulk says thank goodness she looks like her mom and talks about being on the first ever Saturday Night’s Main Event. Cue Randy, with a rose, to interrupt. He says Hulk is the biggest legend anywhere and says Brooke is beautiful, even presenting her with the rose. Randy is a Hulkamaniac as well, so he would like to respectively challenge Hulk to a match at Summerslam. Hulk respectively accepts, but doesn’t seem to like how Randy is looking at Brooke. Short and to the point.

Video on Batista.

King Booker/Finlay/Mark Henry vs. Rey Mysterio/Bobby Lashley/Batista

Lashley sends Finlay into the corner to start and it’s a six man standoff as we take an early break. Back with Finlay slapping a chinlock on Rey before it’s quickly off to Booker. Various things start breaking down, allowing the Leprechaun to slip Finlay the shillelagh to deck Rey for two. Rey is fine enough to kick Henry down (oh dear) but the referee doesn’t see the hot tag to Batista. Booker comes in but Rey dives between their legs and NOW the hot tag brings in Batista. House is cleaned and it’s a 619 to Booker, setting up the Batista Bomb for the pin.

Rating: C-. And that’s going to be Henry’s last televised match for about ten months as Henry completely destroyed his knee (the patella was split completely in two) so forget about Batista’s big revenge. The injury shook things up a lot as you can only get so much out of the good guys being up 3-2, but they did what they could. They did what they could, and it could have been a lot worse.

Vince McMahon gives the Spirit Squad a pep talk but DX takes over the audio, turning it into Vince giving the team spanking instructions.

We see highlights of the first round of Diva Bull Riding from earlier today. Victoria and Michelle McCool made the finals.

Melina/Johnny Nitro vs. Carlito/Trish Stratus

The men start but Nitro tags Melina in, meaning Trish has to do the same (come in, not tag Melina). Nitro trips Trish down early on and Melina adds a thumb to the eye (JR: “You wouldn’t see Meredith Vieira doing something like that.”), setting up a double hair takedown. That bangs up Melina as well so it’s a double tag to the men as everything breaks down. The women fight to the floor and the Backstabber gives Carlito the fast pin. This was really rushed so it didn’t have the chance to go anywhere.

Earlier today, Kevin Von Erich got to make a quick appearance. Nothing wrong with the local legend.

Spirit Squad vs. D-Generation X

Non-title elimination tag and there is a cell on either side of the ring for eliminated members. Shawn says the following thrashing of five male cheerleaders is brought to you by DX, and if you’re not down with that, catchphrase. Shawn gets taken into the corner to start but he manages to grab the megaphone and clean some house. The Squad bails to the floor for a huddle, which HHH breaks up with an air horn. Back in and Shawn superkicks Mitch for the first elimination.

Back from a break with HHH getting rid of Johnny with a spinebuster. Shawn chases Kenny up to the stage, where Vince gets in a chair shot to put Shawn in trouble. They head back to the ring where Shawn suplexes his way out of a sleeper. It’s off to HHH to clean house, including another spinebuster. A double clothesline sets up the Pedigree to get rid of Nicky and it’s 2-2. The superkick gets rid of Mikey and it’s a top rope elbow, followed by Sweet Chin Music into the Pedigree to complete the shutout.

Rating: D. You could say this about any match involving these two sides, but what were you expecting? It’s a pair of the best of all time against five goons. It’s almost a miracle that the Squad lasted this long and it isn’t hard to believe that Shawn and HHH could dispatch them this fast. There was no reason to believe this would be a competitive match and it wasn’t but it also wasn’t anything more than a DX workout session.

Post match Vince tries to unlock the cage but Shawn superkicks him inside with the rest of the Squad.

Video on Sabu.

Here are Great Khali and Daivari for a chat. Daivari talks about how awesome Khali is….and here are Big Show and Paul Heyman to interrupt. Show lists off his size and resume and says one day they’ll have to see who the real giant is. That’s for later though, as he wants to put Khali over tonight. He brings up the Punjabi Prison match but here’s Undertaker to interrupt. Undertaker goes after Khali and clotheslines him to the floor before going after Show. Khali gets back in and a double chokeslam leaves Undertaker laying.

Post break, Big Show says Undertaker can come face him on ECW if he has the guts.

Stevie Richards vs. Sabu

Extreme Rules. Sabu wastes no time in throwing a chair at Richards, setting up the Triple Jump Moonsault for two. Richards misses a charge in the corner and gets laid on a table, setting up the….flying something with a chair kind of in the same area to drive Richards through an already broken table for the pin. This was vintage WWECW: take away any story, feud, reason for these two for fighting and the character that made Richards work and have a match with weapons for the sake of having weapons, because that’s all ECW was about.

We get Brooke Hogan’s About Us music video.

Randy Orton is talking to Brooke Hogan in the parking lot but Hulk comes in to break that up. The Hogans go to leave but Orton runs back in with an RKO onto the trunk to leave Hulk laying.

Michelle McCool wins the Diva Bull Riding contest. Much like the Diva Search, it’s an excuse to have the Divas in various outfits doing various things that involve a lot of shaking.

Video on John Cena losing the Raw World Title to Rob Van Dam, who lost it to Edge, setting up tonight’s title match (which isn’t a triple threat for Van Dam’s title because Van Dam screwed up).

Raw World Title: Edge vs. John Cena

Edge is defending and has Lita with him. We get the Big Match Intros and Edge drops straight to the floor, only to have Cena cut him off in a hurry. Edge low bridges him to the floor though and we take an early break. Back with Edge hammering away in the corner and loading up a superplex, only to slip off the ropes and crash down hard. The referee makes sure they’re both alive and Edge gets two off a big boot. Cena pops up and initiates the finishing sequence but Lita pulls the referee out. The referee is down and Edge misses a spear, setting up the STFU. Lita slaps the referee to send him back inside to call the DQ.

Rating: D+. This was nothing with barely five minutes factoring out the commercial. The biggest problem was the time, which only gave them a chance for one memorable deal, which wound up being Edge nearly killing both of them (it was just a slip). They’re destined for the real match at Summerslam so for now, this worked out fine for the “we’re out of time but here’s what we promised” main event.

Cena celebrates but thankfully understands what the word DISQUALIFICATION means and immediately knows he didn’t win the title. That’s not cool with Cena, who hits a pretty good looking FU off the steps and through the announcers’ table.

Overall Rating: D. Completely skippable show here and you can see how unimportant this series has become. There is no need for some big special when you have the same thing done every Monday and Friday night. The wrestling wasn’t important, the Undertaker appearance was to set up a guest star spot on ECW and there was a bull riding contest for obvious reasons. Nothing to see here, and thankfully WWE/NBC seemed to understand that, as the next one wasn’t for almost a year.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – July 14, 2006: Nice And Average

Smackdown
Date: July 14, 2006
Location: Target Center, Minneapolis, Minnesota
Attendance: 3,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We are rapidly approaching the Great American Bash and now we have a main event. This time around it’s going to be King Booker challenging the weakest World Champion of modern times in Rey Mysterio. Other than that, Batista is back and that could shake things up a lot. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Batista returning and beating up Mark Henry last week.

Opening sequence.

Here are King Booker, Queen Sharmell and William Regal to get things going. Regal reads a proclamation from a scroll, saying that Booker is ready to take his rightful place. Dropping to a knee, Regal promises to destroy Mysterio tonight, all for the glory of Queen Sharmell. JBL: “She’s the queen goddess of HOT!” Booker promises to win the title and talks about Batista returning last week.

We see a clip of Batista destroying Henry, but at the same time, Booker jumped Mysterio in the back for the real beatdown. Booker promises to win the title but here’s Rey. Regal goes to the aisle so Rey can sneak in from the crowd to jump Booker. Perfectly fine opening segment to move forward on the title match.

Matt Hardy vs. Mr. Kennedy

Matt jumps him during the entrance and JBL is not pleased with the lack of the introduction. A belly to back suplex gives Matt two but Kennedy sends him shoulder first into the post. The arm is sent into the buckle for a bonus and Kennedy wraps it around the rope. We hit the armbar for a bit before Kennedy heads up top. That’s fine with Matt, who crotches him down and grabs a superplex.

The Side Effect gets two but the Twist of Fate is countered into a neckbreaker to give Kennedy two of his own. Kennedy tries his own Twist of Fate but Hardy reverses into the real thing, only to have Kennedy grab the rope. The cover takes a bit too long though and Hardy rolls him up for the fast pin.

Rating: C. It’s weird seeing Kennedy pinned and having Matt Hardy be the one to do it is all the more confusing. The match itself was average at best, putting it fairly high up on the Kennedy scale. Matt wasn’t great in the ring at this point but you could pencil him in for a pretty watchable match, which is what you got here.

Raw Rebound.

Michelle McCool and Kristal talk trash about Ashley, who pops up with Jillian Hall for the big catfight. JBL is rather pleased.

Here are Great Khali and Daivari on the stage for a chat. Daivari asks if Undertaker is scared of Khali since he didn’t even show up last week. If Undertaker is this phenom, show yourself. Then the gong sounds and Undertaker pops up in the ring, with Daivari insisting that Khali isn’t afraid. Undertaker shoots lightning at Daivari, who falls down while Khali doesn’t move. Daivari has to beg Khali to not go to the ring and eventually he backs up.

Paul London vs. Jamie Noble

Brian Kendrick and Kid Kash are at ringside as JBL talks about the Pit Bulls’ politics to start. Noble is aggressive early on and hammers away on the ropes. An elbow to the face puts Noble down but he grounds London and grabs a rear naked choke. London breaks it up with a ram into the corner and he starts to kick Noble down. A belly to belly sets up a dropkick to the back for two but Noble’s powerslam gets the same. Kash goes after Kendrick on the floor though and the chase lets Kash get in a cheap shot on London. The fireman’s carry gutbuster gives Noble the cheating pin.

Rating: C. These two are both very talented and it makes sense to put them in the ring together to draw some interest for the pay per view title match. Just don’t do the same thing with the partners swapped in and you’re onto something. We got the idea here so why waste time by doing the same thing again?

Miz is VERY excited about the Diva Search girls in their bikinis for Boot Camp.

Sylvan thinks the Diva Search girls are beautiful, but not as beautiful as Quebec. Come see it. JBL: “I’d rather go to Rwanda. I hate this guy.”

Here’s Teddy Long for the contract signing between Batista and Mark Henry. The match is taking place at the Great American Bash, but we’ll make it a little bigger: the winner gets the World Title shot at Summerslam. As for tonight though, if either of them touches the other, they forfeit the match.

Batista is out first and talks about how good it is to be back. Coming through that curtain is a natural high that he cannot explain and, while getting a little choked up, Batista talks about how much he loves being here. Last year was the best year of his life but then Mark Henry took it all away. The jacket comes off as Batista talks about sitting at home for six months while Henry dominated Smackdown. If Henry thinks last week was payback, he has no idea what is coming for him at the Great American Bash.

Now it’s Henry, with a bandage on his head, coming out to say that Batista must feel good about himself. That was the worst beating he ever received and all it took was the World Champion and Batista jumping him from behind. If it didn’t cost him the Summerslam match, Henry would detach Batista’s head right now. Teddy calms things down and they both sign. The table is turned over but Henry leaves without getting physical.

United States Title: Finlay vs. Bobby Lashley

Lashley is defending and drives Finlay into the corner to start. That earns him a shot to the face and we hit the chinlock early on. That’s fine with Lashley, who is right back with a delayed vertical suplex as we take a break. Back with Finlay dropping him with a clothesline for two and sending Lashley shoulder first into the post. A drop toehold sets up the Crossface but Lashley fights up again.

Clotheslines and a belly to belly have Finlay bailing to the floor, where he throws a chair inside. With that not working, Finlay grabs the Shillelagh but Lashley hits a backdrop and tosses it up to the stage. They fight to the floor where Finlay misses a chair shot so the referee has to take them away. Cue the Leprechaun to throw Finlay another Shillelagh so he can knock Lashley cold for the pin and the title.

Rating: C+. They had a pretty nice physical match here and there’s nothing wrong with putting the title on Finlay. Lashley already got a nice rub out of it and Finlay is tied into the show’s top heel. It wasn’t even a clean loss so Lashley gets to save fast. Good enough power brawl here and the title change is a fine switch.

Earlier today, Vito went shopping at the Mall of America.

Here’s Miz to introduce the Diva Search girls for Divas Boot Camp, as hosted by Sgt. Slaughter. It’s an obstacle course and the winner gets immunity.

Jen goes first and finishes in 42 seconds.

Layla, finishing with the splits gets 37 seconds.

Erica at 48 seconds.

Maryse at 41 seconds.

Milena, who loses her hat, at 49 seconds.

Rebecca, whose hair gets caught in the jump rope, at 49 seconds.

JT, who drops the jump rope, at 43 seconds.

Amy at 46 seconds.

Layla wins immunity, and more importantly, Sgt. Slaughter’s hat. I got that at a house show when I was a kid so I have to smile. This was exactly as advertised: good looking women in swimsuits running and jumping a lot. Throw in Move Along by All American Rejects as the song throughout and I’d call it a success.

Great American Bash rundown.

William Regal vs. Rey Mysterio

Non-title with King Booker and Sharmell on commentary. Joined in progress with Regal holding a chinlock as the EDDIE chants don’t work as well here. Regal elbows him in the face for three straight twos. Rey is back up with a headscissors out of the corner and a basement dropkick for two of his own. Sharmell offers a quick distraction though, allowing Regal to crotch Rey on top. Regal drops a knee and puts on a chinlock as those chants start up again.

Cole gets so annoyed at Booker that he stands up for a bit as Rey is sent to the apron. You don’t do that to Rey, who is right back with a springboard seated senton. Booker gets up for a distraction this time, allowing Rey to hit a baseball slide low blow in the corner. The split legged moonsault gets two and Rey knocks Booker off the apron. The 619 into the top rope splash finishes Regal.

Rating: C. Another run of the mill match but it’s nice to see Mysterio getting a win, even if it’s over someone not quite in the main event. This is why a villain has lackeys though, as Rey beating one of Regal’s associates is a fine way to set him up for the pay per view title match. The match was all about Rey overcoming the odds and it worked out well enough, with Rey FINALLY not looking like a loser.

Rey hits a 619 on Booker to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The wrestling was completely acceptable throughout and it’s hard to complain about the Diva Search stuff, as you can see exactly what they are going for with the whole thing. At the same time, if that cuts down on the stupid stuff like Vito having fun out there, it’s not the worst replacement imaginable. The Bash isn’t looking like the best show ever, but there are enough things on the show that I want to see, so at least it’s feeling better than Vengeance.

 

 

 

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