IMG Credit: WWE

SuperBrawl III
Date: February 21, 1993
Location: Ashville Civic Center, Ashville, North Carolina
Attendance: 6,500
Commentators: Jesse Ventura, Tony Schiavone

This is a one match show and it is all built around Sting vs. Vader. That’s one of those matches that is going to work no matter what, it’s the White Castle of Fear strap match. In other words, we might be in for some special mini movies, which are always, uh, something. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Vader whipping Sting and abusing him with the strap to set up the main event. This is about as low key of an opening as you can get.

Eric Bischoff and Missy Hyatt welcome us to the show and announce that Maxx Payne is replacing Ron Simmons in the US Title match. Hyatt will be handling interviews tonight but won’t say who she’ll be interviewing. Eric brings out Johnny B. Badd (with the snappy sailor’s hat) to run down the card….and that’s it.

Tony Schiavone and Jesse Ventura run down the card because we might not know what we paid to see.

Maxx Payne plays a rock rendition of the Star Spangled Banner.

Hollywood Blonds vs. Marcus Bagwell/Erik Watts

Bagwell is the Rookie of the Year and it always seemed like he held that title forever. Austin and Bagwell lock up to start and the fans are behind Bagwell for one of the few times in his career. Bagwell armdrags him into an armbar before powering Austin down with a pair of top wristlocks. Back up and Steve punches him down, only to get knocked hard to the floor. That doesn’t last long as Austin is thrown inside for a double backdrop, plus a double clothesline to Pillman.

Watts comes in for an armdrag (which doesn’t work that well) on Pillman and a quickly broken armbar. Bagwell comes in for a crossbody and the headlock takeover puts Austin in trouble. It’s back to Watts and the fans boo him out of the building, including as he puts on an abdominal stretch. The announcers debate the merits of cheating (Jesse: “Always take the easy way out. That’s for all you kids out there.”) as Jesse notes the Watts booing.

A bad looking Boston crab has Austin in trouble so Pillman comes in to kick Watts in the face for the break. Pillman gets pulled down into the STF but he’s in the ropes in a hurry. They head outside with Pillman’s dive off the apron missing to send him crashing into the barricade. Austin is back up to beat Watts down on the floor, with the fans being rather pleased. Back in and Pillman breaks up a sunset flip attempt so Watts can be choked on the rope.

The double teaming is on with Austin luring Bagwell in for some double choking. The Rocket Launcher is blocked with raised knees but Austin is back in with a suplex to break up the tag attempt. Austin misses a running crotch attack on the ropes though and it’s a hot tag to Bagwell to clean house. Everything breaks down and Watts is sent outside but makes the mistake of trying to get back in. That leaves Bagwell to Yellowjacket (fisherman’s) suplex Pillman but Austin comes in off the top to break it up and give Pillman the pin at 16:35.

Rating: C+. It’s rare to see a match with two teams having such different levels of talent in one match. Bagwell was getting better but had a pretty firm ceiling. Watts…..no. I get that he was thrown in WAY over his head, but that doesn’t change the fact that he was WAY over his head. He was so tall, lanky and awkward (not his fault mind you as he had no idea what he was doing at this level) that the fans just did not want to see him.

The Blonds getting cheered like that was awesome to see, mainly because they were one of the best tag teams of the 90s and deserve any cheers they get. Better than expected, but almost all because of the Blonds. They just couldn’t get much more out of these two and it was very obvious.

We get a quick clip of the Sting/Vader White Castle of Fear mini movie, featuring Sting flying to the Rocky Mountain.

Bischoff and Badd confirm that Ric Flair will be here tonight.

Flair arrives but Missy Hyatt is escorted away by security while trying to get an interview.

2 Cold Scorpio vs. Chris Benoit

Well ok then. Jesse picks Benoit for his killer instinct, and I’ll go straight to Benoit elbowing Scorpio in the face to get away from that as fast as I can. Benoit stomps away but Scorpio is back up with a spinning high crossbody. A kick to the face puts Benoit on the floor and it’s an armbar back inside to keep Benoit in trouble. Scorpio goes with the hammerlock with his feet and drops backwards to crank on the arm, which does look rather painful. Back up and a Japanese armdrag sends Benoit outside in a huff.

Benoit gets back in for the test of strength with both using some good looking bridges. Scorpio takes him down by the arm again and drops a leg but misses a dropkick. Benoit misses an elbow though and the armbar goes on again. Back up and Benoit ducks a spinning kick to the face and hits that nasty clothesline of his. The backbreaker lets Benoit bend Scorpio’s back over his knee before we hit the chinlock.

Benoit drapes him ribs first over the top and kicks Scorpio outside. A shoulder to the ribs has Benoit staggered but he’s able to avoid the missile dropkick. The chinlock goes on again and it’s off to something rather close to a Liontamer. For some reason Benoit lets go of the hold and grabs another chinlock as we hit the fifteen minute mark about thirteen and a half minutes in. With the holds not working, Benoit takes him up top for a belly to back superplex.

The very delayed cover gets two and a Russian legsweep gets the same. Benoit powerbombs him for two with three minutes left. An enziguri drops Benoit and Scorpio adds a clothesline to send Benoit into the corner. The spinning splash in the corner connects and the twisting splash (which would today be known as Twisted Bliss) gets two. With forty five seconds left, Benoit blocks a victory roll and drops a middle rope leg for two more. Benoit is getting desperate but Scorpio grabs a rollup for the pin at 18:20 (or 19:59 officially).

Rating: B. The good start to the show continues in a much less surprising result. How were these two not going to have a good match? The timing makes sense here as it adds more drama and given that they were only off by about a minute and forty seconds is a minor miracle. I can always go for some Scorpio and while Benoit wasn’t at his greatness yet, you could see all the tools there, waiting to be developed.

Maxx Payne is replacing the injured Ron Simmons in the US Title match. He and his guitar (Norma Jean) have a song ready for champion Dustin Rhodes and of course we hear a little bit….of Taps.

Bill Irwin vs. British Bulldog

Irwin is an evil cowboy and the Bulldog gets a ROAR on his in-ring debut. Smith shoves him down with ease to start and the fans are behind Smith the whole way. Irwin’s shots against the ropes don’t do much good as Smith runs him down with ease. A hard clothesline puts Irwin on the floor and it’s a gorilla press back inside to make it worse. Back in and Irwin kicks away at the ribs as Tony tries to figure out what Jesse means when he talks about Bulldog’s cornrows.

A cover gets one with Smith pressing launching him on the kickout so the chinlock goes on instead. That’s broken up in a hurry and Smith sends him into the corner for a running shoulder. Jesse: “How come they call it an Irish whip? Is it from Ireland?” Tony: “Uh yeah 1863 in a wrestling match there.” Jesse: “….that’s amazing.” I have no idea if Tony made that up on the spot or not but Jesse had NOTHING in response. Anyway Irwin gets up a boot in the corner but dives into the running powerslam for the pin at 5:43.

Rating: D+. Not much of a match here but it was fine enough for an introduction to Smith. A lot of people already knew who he was but you need to let him come in there and beat someone up. That being said, it wasn’t exactly thrilling and Smith looked like he was already getting old and slow. Go while you have the chance I guess, but it wasn’t exactly good.

Vader is waiting for Sting in the White Castle of Fear.

Smith wants the World Title and is ready to eat Vader up.

Badd and Hyatt are ready for the UK tour.

Paul Orndorff is ready for Cactus Jack….who is right here to start their match in a hurry.

Paul Orndorff vs. Cactus Jack

Falls Count Anywhere and Jack chases Orndorff through the entrance with a shovel. Orndorff chokes with an electric cord but Jack slams him onto the concrete. The mats are pulled back for the elbow off the apron and the super sunset flip to the floor for two. They go inside with Orndorff ripping at Jack’s mouth but that’s enough so they fight outside and over the barricade.

Tony FINALLY explains the story here, as these two fought to team with Vader in a cage match but Vader jumped Jack. That made Jack get the shovel and he’s been swinging it since. Back to ringside with Jack being sent into the barricade, followed by a top rope ax handle to the head back inside. Orndorff starts going after Jack’s bad knee, taking the brace off in the process, and then suplexes him over the top and onto the apron (that’s a new one).

The Figure Four goes on and Orndorff grabs the rope. For some reason the referee yells at him but Jack punches Orndorff in the face for the break instead. Makes sense. They head outside again with Orndorff sending him knee first into the concrete. The knee brace to the head sends Jack to the floor again and Orndorff unloads on the leg with a chair. Orndorff calls for the piledriver but Jack channels his inner Old Man Marley and hits him in the face with the shovel for the pin at 12:17.

Rating: B+. Now that was a lot of fun as these guys beat the living heck out of each other for twelve minutes. It takes something special to hang with Jack in a fight like this for so long and that’s what Orndorff was. He’s grown on me a good bit over the years and they had a really, really good brawl here. Orndorff looked awesome and Jack was crazy over with the fans so what more do you need?

Rock N Roll Express vs. Heavenly Bodies

This is part of the Smoky Mountain Wrestling talent trade with WCW, meaning Jim Cornette is here with the Bodies. The idea is now former WCW boss Bill Watts brought out the Express as the SMW Tag Team Champions but Cornette came out with the Bodies and said not so fast. A feud was set off and it’s time to fight here, with Bobby Eaton out with Cornette and the Bodies.

So yes, Eaton and Stan Lane are against the Express and unfortunately we couldn’t get one last WCW match between the famous teams. The Express of course gets a crazy reaction and the fans can’t stand Cornette, partially because he talks about how ugly the fans are. It really isn’t all that hard you see. Eaton gets ejected before the bell (Cornette hugs him goodbye) and it’s Prichard driving Gibson into the corner to start.

A flying headscissors takes Prichard down though and it’s off to Morton for the hurricanrana. Lane comes in off a hot tag and is immediately armdragged into an armbar as the Bodies can’t get much going early on (because these people know how to book a southern tag match). Morton works on Lane’s arm and sends him into Prichard in the corner and Gibson comes in to do the opposite. Cornette and company need a breather on the floor, with Jesse making a thinly veiled gay joke.

A double backdrop puts Prichard down but he gets Morton into the corner. Morton is out in a hurry though and it’s a four way standoff. Morton and Lane hit the crisscross but Morton drops to the floor to chase Cornette. Back in and the Bodies get caught in a double noggin knocker and a right hand drops Cornette off the apron. Cornette gets a grab of Morton’s foot though and the Bodies FINALLY take over.

A swinging neckbreaker gets two on Morton and the chinlock goes on. The referee catches Lane trying to sneak in and breaks it up but Cornette distracts the referee as Morton grabs a sunset flip. Lane makes the save so Prichard can hit the powerbomb for two. A double DDT gets Morton out of trouble and the hot tag brings in Gibson to clean house.

Everything breaks down and it’s a double dropkick to Prichard but the illegal Lane and Morton distract the referee. Cornette comes in to distract Gibson though and Prichard is up with a bulldog. Morton is back up to take Prichard down for two but Cornette has the referee AGAIN. Cue Eaton, but he hits Prichard by mistake, allowing Gibson to get the fast pin at 12:53.

Rating: B. This is the old southern style tag match with five people who could do this match int heir sleep and then did it rather well indeed. It was a great flashback to a long gone era and that’s the point of something like SMW. Granted that didn’t work long term, but for a one off like this, it was pretty awesome.

Sting isn’t sure what to make of the White Castle of Fear.

US Title: Dustin Rhodes vs. Maxx Payne

Payne is challenging and substituting for an injured Ron Simmons. We even get a quick rule explanation and we’re ready to go. Dustin knocks him to the floor and then clotheslines him outside again. Back in and the armdrag sends Payne outside for a third time in less than two minutes. The armbar slows Payne down but he fights up, only to get caught in a running armdrag into another armbar.

Back up and Payne misses a charge into the corner, meaning we hit the armbar all over again. Payne fights to his feet again, misses a shot, and gets kneed in the arm again. Dustin charges into an elbow but gets up a boot in the corner. With nothing else working, Payne hits Dustin in the face and grabs…his own armbar. Egads can these people do anything else?

The Payne Killer (yes, another armbar) is blocked so Payne puts a knee in the chest instead. Some forearms put Dustin on the floor and a backdrop puts him down back inside. Dustin’s comeback thrills the people who haven’t left their seats and Payne misses an elbow drop. A running clothesline puts Payne down and a suplex gives Dustin two. The abdominal stretch goes on but Payne breaks it up, sending Dustin into the referee for the DQ at 11:29.

Rating: D. Egads what a mess this was. It was a bunch of armbars until they had a sloppy brawl and a bad ending. They really couldn’t come up with anyone better to challenge Dustin than Payne? I know Simmons wasn’t available but come on already. At least find someone who looks like a threat or you could pin.

Vader and Sting finally meet. These clips are less than ten seconds each and that might be for the best.

Here’s the returning Ric Flair to do commentary on the NWA World Title match. Flair is all fired up and reminds us that he never lost the title.

NWA World Title: Barry Windham vs. Great Muta

Windham is challenging and yes, we’re supposed to care about the NWA in 1993. Muta has Hiro Matsuda with him. We get the introductions and the WE WANT FLAIR chants are on again. Oh and the NWA allows you to come off the top, because the NWA and WCW had different rules and fans were supposed to be interested in all of this stuff. Feeling out process to start and Windham easily gets the better of a test of strength.

That’s broken up and Muta headlocks him to the mat, with Windham at least trying to fight up, which is something you don’t see often enough in a situation like this. Windham fights up for a belly to back suplex attempt but can’t escape yet. Back up and Muta scores with a dropkick so the headlock can go on again. Windham still can’t suplex his way out and we’re told it’s ten minutes in, even though it’s been less than seven.

Muta snaps off a suplex and drops the power drive elbow. The headlock stays on, they fight up, the headlock takes them down again. Another dropkick misses though and Windham hits a DDT for no cover. Windham knocks him outside as Jesse talks about Flair’s intimidating security team at ringside. Back in and Windham drops some knees to the head for two before grabbing the sleeper.

That stays on for a good while as the rather slow pace continues. Some feet on the ropes make it clear that Windham is the heel here, though I have a problem believing that the fans are going to be interested in anyone but Flair. Back up and Windham gets two off a gutwrench suplex before sending Muta outside. That lets Muta get fired up and the slugout is on with Windham getting the better of it and grabbing a chinlock. Muta fights up with some shots to the face but can’t get a sunset flip.

Windham’s piledriver attempt is countered with a backdrop so he knocks Muta right back down. The superplex is broken up though and now the comeback is on, including the handspring elbow. Muta misses the moonsault (as pretty as ever) but he’s fine enough to hit a belly to back suplex. Another moonsault attempt hits knees and Windham hits the implant DDT (or close to it as Muta was still on his feet while Windham landed) for the pin and the title at 24:09.

Rating: D. Well that didn’t work and the reason was Ric Flair. Ok so maybe that was part of it, along with Muta apparently having the flu. At the end of the day though, the fans only cared about Flair and were stuck waiting almost five more months before he would win the title. I’m sure there’s a logic to it, but having anything involving the NWA at this point was a waste of time.

Vader and Sting strap up.

The hosts make their main event picks.

Vader vs. Sting

Vader’s World Title isn’t on the line and it’s a strap match (four corners version) with Harley Race in Vader’s corner. They take their sweet time setting up the strap, allowing Jesse to point out how hard it’s going to be for Sting to pull Vader anyway. Vader uses the strap to pull him down to start and then does it again to set up the story of the match in a hurry. Sting is down again so Vader drops an elbow to the ribs as commentary explains the always hazy “broken momentum” rule.

A middle rope splash crushes Sting but he’s back up with those shots to the face that only he could make work. An enziguri of all things puts Vader down but Jesse points out that you can’t drag Vader around when he’s on the mat. The top rope splash makes the problem worse but Vader starts rolling around. Sting starts whipping away, including a shot to knock Race off the apron.

It’s time to go outside with Vader being pulled hard into the post and there’s a slam to put Vader down on the floor. Sting gets two buckles (posts actually) out there but gets sent hard into the barricade to break that up. Vader’s back is bleeding after that whipping so Sting makes it worse with a Samoan drop back inside. The standing body splashes put Sting down but he backdrops his way out of a powerbomb to show off the strength. Sting misses a top rope splash and gets crushed by Vader’s version.

There’s a Samoan drop to Sting to even the score and the Vader Bomb has Race celebrating. Now it’s time to whip Sting, with Jesse saying it’s like Tony whipping his children. A super Samoan drop knocks Sting silly but Vader can only get two buckles. The Vader Bomb misses and the fans are all happy again. The breather lets Sting crotch Vader on top and a slam brings him back down.

Vader is up first again though and hits Sting in the face, only to have Sting do it right back. A superplex takes Sting down again for three buckles but Sting ties his leg around the ropes. Sting drops Vader again and the momentum is broken. You don’t tick Vader off though so he unloads with rights and lefts in the corner. Vader uses the strap to pull him in so Sting uses a Liger kick to get a knockdown.

There’s a DDT but the referee gets bumped. Sting doesn’t seem to mind as he picks Vader up in a fireman’s carry for three, only to trip over the referee. Sting is exhausted so Vader sits on his chest and ties him up for three, but Sting isn’t done. He is however eternally stupid though and kicks Vader into the corner to give him the win at 20:54.

Rating: A-. Like these two could ever do anything wrong. Vader’s back was SCARY out there as he was covered in blood and looked like he had fallen on glass. This was what you would expect out of Vader and Sting, even if the White Castle deal was pure early 90s WCW stupidity. Ignoring that though, it’s a heck of a fight and makes me want to watch them go at it again, which they would do for a long time to come.

Post match Sting whips Vader to the floor.

Barry Windham joins the hosts and promises to win all the titles.

Tony and Jesse wrap us up.

Roll credits.

Overall Rating: B+. There are bad things on the show but the stuff that works are more than enough to make up for them. This is an awesome show and a true hidden gem that no one ever talks about. Aside from the White Castle stuff and thinking the NWA still mattered (I’m still surprised it even existed) at this point, they let the wrestling speak for itself here and that is often a very good idea. Make a few changes and this is an all time classic, but as it is, it’s just a heck of a show and worth seeing if you clip some stuff out.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

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IMG Credit: Impact Wrestling

Impact Wrestling
Date: July 12, 2019
Hosts: Don Callis, Josh Matthews

This is a different kind of show as it is a fallout show from Slammiversary, meaning it’s going to be similar to a post Takeover show in NXT. Just like those shows, there was a match taped to fit in here, but the majority of the show is going to be about the pay per view. It was a good show so the extra attention is a good thing. Let’s get to it.

Here are Sunday’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Don and Josh talk about how awesome Slammiversary was and how many people loved it. Fair enough as it was quite good.

Video on Moose vs. Rob Van Dam, which didn’t do Van Dam many favors.

Van Dam says he underestimated Moose. He wants another shot though.

Moose says he used to think Van Dam was the best in the world but the better legend won tonight.

Video on Eddie Edwards vs. Killer Kross. Eddie has gone near the edge and Kross keeps pushing him, setting up their First Blood match at Slammiversary.

Eddie loves the feeling of not knowing what he’s going to do next.

Kross likes Eddie changing and wants to know what he’s going to turn into. Now Eddie is just like him.

Josh and Don are in an office called the Impact War Room where they’re going to talk to some dignitaries throughout the night. First up is Jimmy Jacobs, who liked the chaos in the women’s Monster’s Ball match. Don thought it was the best Monster’s Ball ever and Taya Valkyrie impressed him with her surprise win.

Video on Monster’s Ball with James Mitchell narrating about how the plan was to have Havok win the title. It would have been ok if Su Yung won, but it’s not ok that Taya retained.

Taya says it wasn’t fair that she had to defend against so many people but she did it anyway.

Mitchell snaps about how crazy Su is and wants to know where she is.

D’Lo Brown is now with Impact full time and talks about the Tag Team Title match, which was changed just two days before Slammiversary when the North won the titles. Brown isn’t sure how anyone can deal with the North.

Video on the title match with the North retaining in what might have been LAX’s farewell from the company.

The Rascalz are tired of losing.

The North says LAX has lost the titles four times but they’ve never lost them once.

Santana is injured and had to be helped out. Konnan threatens the North.

From A Night You Can’t Mist.

Tommy Dreamer/Great Muta vs. Johnny Impact/Michael Elgin

Muta and Impact start things off with Josh declaring this to be a moment. Muta isn’t about to be taken down by the leg so he easily reverses on the mat, setting up an early chinlock. Dreamer comes in and gets to do his own power drive elbow, because Tommy Dreamer needs to get to do all of his wrestling wish list things and we have to watch him for some reason.

Impact gets in a shot from behind on Dreamer and it’s off to Elgin to take over. The delayed vertical suplex looks to set up a twisting Swanton but Dreamer moves. Ignore that Elgin would have missed him but three feet even if Dreamer hadn’t moved. Muta comes in and dropkicks Elgin, meaning it’s already back to Dreamer. Tommy has to take out John E. Bravo and we take a break.

Back with Dreamer in trouble in the corner but Muta comes in as everything breaks down. Dreamer grabs the table (of course) but Elgin and Impact beat him up and set the table up himself (it’s a pride thing). Elgin is laid on the table and Dreamer hits an AA (not a Death Valley Driver) to send Impact through him.

Back in and Taya Valkyrie breaks up the Death Valley Driver to Impact but Muta mists Impact. Elgin gets misted as well and there’s the Shining Wizard for a big reaction. Elgin gets one as well, followed by Dreamer misting Taya and giving her a cutter. Another Shining Wizard to Impact is good for the double pin at 16:11 shown (the full match runs 20:10).

Rating: C-. This wasn’t bad with Muta feeling like something special and Dreamer being the guy who just won’t go away and has to get in all of his time with the legends. Impact and Elgin were good foils here and beating them feels important, though this was all about Muta, which is perfectly fine. He isn’t going to be around much longer so enjoy his legendary stuff while you can.

Post match Dreamer talks about how much he loved Muta as a kid (WELL OF COURSE HE DID) and it was an honor to be here tonight.

And now, Dreamer is here with Josh and Don. He wanted to he a Sting/Great Muta hybrid (so he completely failed in that area) and still feels 25 when he walks through the curtain. They switch to talking about Sami Callihan, who is the closest person to an ECW name that they have on their roster (save for ALL THE ECW PEOPLE that is).

Video on Sami Callihan vs. Tessa Blanchard, which main evented the show for reasons I’m still not clear on. Tessa gave it her all but got caught with the Cactus Special, though Sami did show her some respect to end the show.

Tessa says they changed wrestling. How? By having an intergender match main event the show? I’m not entirely sure how much of a game changer that is.

Sami says let’s do it again.

Bound For Glory is in Chicago on October 20.

Petey Williams (YAY CANADA) was impressed by the X-Division Title match. Swann is ready to challenge for the World Title.

Video on Swann vs. Impact, which was a huge milestone for Swann.

Taya blames Bravo for the loss.

Scott D’Amore was worried about Michael Elgin winning the World Title because he doesn’t care about anything but himself. Callis brings up smart marks being worried about the match and laughs, because this is the kind of company that brings up smart marks.

Video on Cage vs. Elgin with Cage retaining the title in a war.

Cage says he told you so.

Elgin says he didn’t fail because he sent Cage to the hospital. Now he wants to hurt Don Callis because Callis sent the masked man after him.

Jordynne Grace vs. Kiera Hogan vs. Madison Rayne

They all take turns missing kicks to the face until grace clotheslines them both down. Rayne’s enziguri hits Kiera but Grace suplexes her right back down. Grace’s suplex to Hogan is broken up so she goes with shoulders in the corner. Rayne breaks up the Grace Driver and everyone is down as we take a break. Back with Rayne hitting a high crossbody for a delayed two on Grace but Kiera breaks it up and yells at her.

That earns Kiera a sliding lariat but Kiera is right back with something close to Zack Ryder’s old Zack Attack. More shouting in the corner ensues as Kiera chokes and forearms Madison in the back. Kiera tries a suicide dive on Grace and gets stopped in a hurry, though Madison kicks them both down. That’s good for two each back inside, followed by a Stunner to Grace.

Kiera kicks Madison down for the same before going back to Grace, who isn’t having any of this. An O’Connor roll gets two on Madison but Grace German suplexes Kiera at the same time for a pretty cool spot. They head into the corner with Grace getting caught in the Tree of Woe for the Alberto top rope stomp from Madison. Grace is back up and sends Madison outside before glaring down at Kiera. The Grace Driver finishes Hogan at 15:58.

Rating: C. Kiera is getting better at being a heel and I want to see someone shut her up so well done on the first front. Madison is still the same perfectly acceptable wrestler that she always has been. Grace on the other hand feels like someone who could be something special and seeing her win the title before the end of the year wouldn’t surprise me whatsoever.

Post match Grace offers Madison a handshake but Madison turns on her and beats her down. Kiera gets up and helps Madison to leave Grace laying to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. I didn’t hate this concept and it’s something that can work well, though less Dreamer getting to act out his childhood fantasies would be an improvement. This would have worked better as an hour long show but the idea is sold and a good way to make people want to see what you have coming soon. Doing it after Bound For Glory wouldn’t be the worst idea either and what we got here was done well enough. Nice little change of pace here.

Results

Jordynne Grace b. Kiera Hogan and Madison Rayne – Grace Driver to Hogan

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

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IMG Credit: House Of Glory

Culture Clash 19
Date: April 6, 2019
Location: NYC Arena, Jamaica, New York
Commentators: Matthew Ryan Shapiro, JD, Ben Venuto

This is Amazing Red’s House of Glory promotion and as usual, I have no idea what to expect from this show as I’ve never seen the promotion before, but that’s the point of the weekend. The card looked good though and that’s enough to get me to check out the show. Hopefully it’s as solid as it looks, but you never can tell. Let’s get to it.

The announcers welcome us to the show. For some reason, almost no commentators have been shown all week.

Smiley vs. Leroy Green

Casket match (Who starts with a casket match?), with Green seemingly wanting to save Smiley from some evil stable. Green starts fast with a reverse hurricanrana and a regular hurricanrana and it’s already time for the casket. The fans chant for Smiley, which one commentator says is the fans being behind Green. Back in and Smiley takes over as the announcers explain a bit more of the backstory with Green going after the House of Gangone stable, of which Smiley seems to be a member.

Smiley whips him into the casket and pulls out a kendo stick for a beating. Green hits a quick superkick and takes the stick away to beat on Smiley instead. A modified Backstabber sends Smiley outside, where he finds a chair to throw at Green’s head. Smiley puts the chair on Green’s face and beats on it with the stick, eventually breaking it in half. Green is right back up and ties him in the ropes, where Smiley spits in his face. A pull of the ropes sends Smiley into the chair but he’s fine enough to hit a brainbuster onto the turnbuckle.

It’s time to set up a door between the ring and the barricade but Green backdrops his way out of trouble. Smiley is fine enough to hit a pair of buckle bombs and a running powerbomb onto the ramp. Green gets back up again and spears him through the doors for the big knockdown. Back in and Green rips off the mask before pulling out Smiley’s old mask (a smiley face mask), which Smiley puts on. Before we can find out the impact, Green knocks him into the casket for the win at 15:16.

Rating: C-. The action was good but they threw you into what seemed like a big story pretty fast. Commentary explained as much of it as they could though and I wasn’t lost so it could have been worse. Smiley wasn’t very good and while Green was better, neither of them exactly came off as anything special.

House of Glory Title: Anthony Gangone vs. Robby Eagles

Gangone, with his left hand in a cast, is defending and seems to be the top heel in the promotion. He has three belts (the House of Glory Title and both CZW Tag Team Titles since his partner Amazing Red suddenly retired) and a bunch of people with him, including two guys to rap his theme song. Gangone’s minions distract Eagles to start and a thumb to the eye has him in early trouble.

The threat of a right hand makes Eagles duck and Gangone gets two off a DDT. Dreams By The Waterfall (something out of a torture rack) is broken up and Eagles knocks him into the corner for his first offense. What appeared to be Sliced Bread is broken up so Eagles goes with a middle rope Downward Spiral instead. A 450 misses but Eagles slips out of a package piledriver and nails an enziguri. Gangone kicks him in the face again and hits a package facebuster for a rather near fall.

Eagles’ low superkick again looks to set up the 450 but Gangone rolls to the ropes. That’s fine with Eagles as he jumps down and puts on a cross between an Indian deathlock and a Figure four. The goons distract the referee though and the tap isn’t seen but the goons do get ejected. As the goons argue, a mystery woman (the announcers don’t know her name) comes in and kicks Eagles low, setting up Dreams By The Waterfall (torture rack flipped forward into a knee to the face) to retain the title at 9:54.

Rating: C+. Pretty nice match here with Gangone as a good cult style leader. You need a bunch of minions to make something like that work and Gangone had it covered with at least five people helping him out. I wasn’t wild on his in-ring work but he was getting the character stuff down and that’s what matters more.

Post match the goons surround Gangone as he sits in the middle of the ring and talks about all of his injuries. The fans still boo him no matter what he does and now Amazing Red has retired due to a serious injury. WWE even put out a video with wrestlers like Ricochet and Sasha Banks thanking him for everything he’s done. Gangone says he’s going to break character (erg) because Red retiring just showed that he was weak of body and mind. Without Gangone, this place wouldn’t exist and even his house needs to learn that. Gangone yells at his goons, saying none of them matter without him.

Cue about ten people in Smiley masks to jump the House of Gangone…but they fight the Smileys off without much trouble. Commentary says they’re as lost as anyone else as the goons leave. One final man comes in and Gangone punches him to no effect. The guy hits a Scorpion Death Drop and beats up the goons, including a piledriver to the woman. Something like a piledriver plants Gangone and the man leaves with the group of Smileys.

That was quite a bit and straight out of the Sting vs. NWO years, complete with a Scorpion Death Drop. It didn’t make a ton of sense but I’m assuming that the story will be addressed on whatever regular shows this promotion does. It’s a lot to throw at you at once and for what is supposed to be a showcase show, I’m not sure it’s the best idea to have commentary saying they don’t get it either.

Juba vs. Ryan Burgandy vs. Evander James vs. Big Daddy Cruise vs. Kai vs. Matt Travis

The winner is the #1 contender to the Crown Jewel (midcard) Title. Burgandy might be five feet tall but his shirt says that he’s really big (and his theme music is a cover of Larger Than Life). Cruise is a big ladies man, because that’s the most original gimmick in the world. Juba, the biggest man in the match, starts slamming people and shoves away everyone trying to get on him at once.

Cruise hits a sitout powerbomb for two on James and Travis hits a heck of a German suplex for two on Cruise with Kai making the save. Travis and Kai go at it for a bit with Kai getting two off a brainbuster. Juba comes back in and starts throwing smaller humans around until Cruise comes in for some better luck. Evander teases a dive but instead just goes to the floor for a right hand to Juba. Travis and Burgandy hit shooting stars off the top to take out everyone else, leaving us with the two of them going inside.

That doesn’t last long as James comes back in with a Meteora to Burgandy in the corner. Kai comes in with a superkick for two but Cruise makes a save. Cruise’s Michinoku Driver gets two with Juba making the save this time. Burgandy manages to German suplex Juba for two and tries a shooting star to a standing Juba….who doesn’t seem to see him coming and they collide. Juba’s spinning fall away slam plants Burgandy but Travis comes in and steals the pin at 8:53.

Rating: C-. Like so many shows this weekend, this was a bunch of people in the ring at once and everyone trying to get in whatever they can in the limited time they have. It’s not a bad match but it could have been better with some more time for the people to shine. Or just less people involved.

Post match a bunch of people from CZW invade and beat down the people from the match. CZW owner DJ Hyde says he’s coming for his Tag Team Titles and if you want a real show, come see their stuff. He’s coming for Gangone and Red as well. Oh and screw the fans. The locker room comes out to chase them off. Ken Broadway, apparently a rather soft spoken guy, swears a lot and says come back and fight. While he has a mic, Broadway asks if he can take Red’s place against Fenix in the main event. That’s an affirmative.

Low Ki/LAX vs. Great Muta/Pentagon Jr./Tajiri

Diamante is here with LAX. Since the curtain doesn’t quite fit in the entrance, you can see LAX walking around before their entrance. Pentagon and Ortiz start things off and the dueling chants are on in a hurry. Pentagon shows him CERO MIEDO and gets sent into the corner for a running elbow. That just means a Sling Blade and the Karate Kid pose, sending Ortiz bailing into the corner.

It’s off to Tajiri vs. Santana for a feeling out process with Santana taking him to the mat. The big kick sends Santana outside and it’s time for Muta vs. Low Ki. Muta takes him down so Low Ki has the legs up to hold him off as the slow pace continues. Muta’s full nelson into a Fujiwara armbar has Low Ki down again and a Kimura sends Low Ki to the rope. The power drive elbow connects and it’s back to Tajiri, who grabs Low Ki by the tie. Well you knew that was coming.

A slap to the back of the bald head ticks Low Ki off enough that he drags Tajiri into the corner as the heat segment begins. It’s a quick heat though as Tajiri kicks at the leg and brings Pentagon back in. Low Ki kicks him down and goes after the mask with Tajiri making the save. LAX goes into their sequence of suplexes and splashes for two, which somehow fires Pentagon up enough for the hot tag to Muta.

A Shining Wizard sends Santana into the corner but Low Ki drops Muta with a springboard kick to the head. Everything breaks down and Low Ki gets triple teamed for a bit and double red mist takes out LAX. Low Ki goes up for the stomp but dives into the green mist, setting up the Shining Wizard for the pin at 16:44.

Rating: C. Oh come on like the quality of the match matters at all here. This was all about Muta and that’s all it needed to be. It’s a great moment as you don’t get to see a legend like that every day. This was a completely acceptable match and the mist at the end made it all the cooler. The rest of the match was fine too, but just seeing Muta was a great treat.

Post match LAX demands their music be played, which goes on for some time.

Crown Jewel Title: Mantequilla vs. Kikutaro

Kikutaro is challenging. Mantequilla (Spanish for butter) has a cape and is called the Lucha Hero. The early exchange of wristlocks (in slow motions) goes to Mantequilla in the form of some armdrags and Kikutaro wants a timeout on the floor. Back in and Kikutaro gets his own armdrags but the third is blocked to give Mantequilla two.

Kikutaro goes with the comedy in the form of a kick and two fingers to the back of the tights. Back in and they trade superhero poses before three armdrags have Kikutaro in trouble. Kikutaro charges into some raised boots in the corner so he throws the referee into the corner for a Stinger Splash on Mantequilla. Another charge into the boot knocks Kikutaro cold so Mantequilla rolls him over, but Kikutaro keeps rolling to stay on his stomach.

Mantequilla finally gets him up into the corner and whips the referee at him for a missed splash. Kikutaro gets two off a sitout AA but he misses a moonsault. The champ misses a Swanton so they trade low blows and rather soft chops. Double eye pokes are both blocked, as are more low blows. A hug is offered and Kikutaro hugs the referee to show his sincerity. Of course he chops Mantequilla, earning himself a crucifix bomb for two. A spinning palm strike retains the title at 16:17.

Rating: D. The World Title match gets less than ten minutes and this breaks sixteen? I’ll give them this much: it actually didn’t feel that long. I don’t think anyone was believing that the title was changing hands here and I could see Mantequilla having a better match against a serious opponent. It wasn’t the worst, but much longer than a comedy match should be going.

Boss Rob Blatt brings out new Women’s Champion Bobbi Tyler for a chat. Rob leaves and Bobbi introduces herself to the crowd, saying she can’t wait to get out of this horrible country. If any of the women in the back want a title shot, they can come to London and get one because she’s never coming back to this disgusting city again. This brings out former champion Sonya Strong, who grabs the title and says Bobbi better understand that no one else is taking the title. A belt shot knocks Bobbi out.

Sonya Strong/Violette vs. Kris Stadtlander/Nikki Adams

Sonya and Violette don’t have the best history together and Kris is an alien. Sonya headscissors Kris down to start and it’s already off to the partners. Violette slaps Nikki in the face and gets pulled down into a choke. Commentary compares Nikki to the crazy people you see muttering to themselves in the frozen food section. That’s certainly some unique character analysis. Sonya stomps away in the corner and blocks a powerbomb out of said corner before handing it back to Violette for some shoulders to the ribs.

We hit the chinlock for a few moments until Adams fights up and gets over for the tag in a hurry. A Blue Thunder Bomb gets two on Sonya and something like Eat Defeat (knee instead of foot) is good for the same. Adams hits a cutter on Violette as everything breaks down. Sonya German suplexes Kris to send her outside but kicks Violette by mistake, leaving Sonya vs. Adams. With Adams tied in the Tree of Woe, here’s Bobbi to distract Sonya again. It’s enough for Kris to kick Sonya in the back of the head, allowing Adams to steal the pin at 8:45.

Rating: D+. This was fairly messy, though it’s a lot better than some matches you’ll see on a show like this. The women were far more polished than others and Kris stood out, even with the rather bizarre ALIEN gimmick. I know this isn’t the most down to earth (no pun intended) promotion in the world, but an alien? Really? It’s certainly unique but it doesn’t exactly fit.

Ken Broadway vs. Rey Fenix

After the wrong music plays, we’re ready to do. Broadway gets rapped to the ring live and makes it rain in the ring. Fenix shakes his hand but doesn’t seem all that impressed so he starts firing off the kicks. A headscissors is countered but Fenix sends him outside for an early breather. Back in and Broadway slams him down for another trip to the floor, this time capped off by a suicide dive.

A missile dropkick gives Ken two (somewhat impressive as Broadway has some size) and a suplex is good for the same. Fenix misses a charge in the corner but spins to the apron, setting up a springboard missile dropkick for two. Broadway gets knocked outside and it’s a suicide dive to send him into the barricade for the big crash. Back in and Fenix hits his several springboards wristdrag but Broadway is right back with a gutbuster.

The Backstabber gets two more but Fenix ties him in the ropes and goes up. In your HE SHOULDN’T BE ABLE TO DO THAT move, Fenix walks the ropes and kicks Broadway in the face, setting up a running Canadian Destroyer. Broadway is on his feet before Fenix though and hits the Currency (Penalty) Kick for the very fast pin at 8:21.

Rating: C+. Well ok then. The ending was as sudden as anything I can remember in a long time as Fenix was making his big comeback and then a single kick to the chest puts him away. That’s not exactly the kind of finisher you would expect from someone called the Self Made Savage or someone of his size. Either way, it’s quite a win for Broadway and Fenix got to be his usually impressive self.

Post match they shake hands and Broadway thanks Fenix for the match. Fenix says Broadway won with honor and thanks the fans. This has been a crazy weekend for Fenix but the fans are a great reason to come here and fight like he did tonight. He’ll be back and he wants a rematch, which gets a handshake from Broadway. After Fenix leaves, Broadway calls out Gangone because the World Title is his.

Private Party vs. Juicy Product

That would be Isaiah Kassidy/Marq Quen vs. JT Dunn/David Starr because DAVID STARR MUST APPEAR ON EVERY WRESTLEMANIA WEEKEND SHOW EVER (not a bad thing as I like the guy)! Private Party has a very energetic entrance and the fans seem to like them. Before the match, Private Party has everyone involved say YEAH very loudly. Starr works on Quen’s arm to a standoff to start. Quen gets taken down by the leg into a rollup for two and gets his lip busted open somewhere in there. Fans: “SAY YOU’RE SORRY!”

Instead, Quen dropkicks Starr in the face and back for one and it’s off to Dunn for some double teaming. A double elbow drops an invading Kassidy and it’s time for the Party to take a breather on the floor. The breather seems to work as they come back in with a camel clutch/stomp combination to Starr, sending Starr and Dunn to the floor. That means a big flip dive to the floor….and Never Gonna Give You Up (the Rick Roll song) starts playing. As everyone dances, Starr and Dunn jump the Party to take over.

The song starts again so Dunn can dance while Starr keeps stomping. Actually make that both Starr and Dunn dancing together, complete with a kiss. And now, with that out of the way, we get back to a normal tag match with Quen being worked over in the corner (Yes, we’re just supposed to go back to a normal match. Why does this surprise you?).

A double dropkick gets two but it’s Quen fighting back with forearms and a double dropkick of his own. The hot tag brings in Kassidy and everything breaks down. A heck of a Swanton gets two on Starr but Dunn comes back in with a top rope double stomp to Kassidy’s back. Kassidy gets powerbombed onto Dunn’s knees but Quen is back up with a bunch of kicks to the head.

Starr blasts Kassidy with a clothesline but a shooting star onto his back puts everyone down. The Party is up first with a pop up Codebreaker on Dunn and another shooting star to the back gets two as Starr makes a save. Starr gets in a knee to Quen’s face to set up an RKO from Dunn for two as frustration sets in. The Party gets back up and Dunn is sat on top for a hurricanrana into a cutter to give Quen the pin at 18:00.

Rating: B. Completely and utterly WHAT THE CENSORED moment in the middle aside, I liked this match more than anything else on the show. Starr continues to live up to his name and Dunn was quite the performer as well. Private Party is a fun team and I could see them going somewhere with some more seasoning. The announcers mentioned that they had wrestled a host of top level teams so there’s clearly something there.

Overall Rating: C. This show was a hard one to rate as you have some good action and VERY deep stories, but that second part is the problem: for newcomers, you’re going to be very lost if you don’t pay very close attention, and even then there’s a lot you’re going to miss. The House of Gangone seems to be connected to everything on the show and there’s a lot of moving parts.

The show itself was a nice mixture of stuff, though they could have trimmed some of the time down by not having so many angles and lost post match sequences. It didn’t feel like a show designed to draw in new viewers, which is kind of a weird choice for a show on this big of a stage. I liked it well enough, but I could use a history lesson to know how all of this ties together.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Another request and again, if you’re interested in Starrcade, check out my e-book of Complete Starrcade reviews at Amazon right here:

https://www.amazon.com/KBs-History-Starrcade-Thomas-Hall-ebook/dp/B00D2UKOG0

Starrcade 1990
Date: December 16, 1990
Location: Kiel Auditorium, St. Louis, Missouri
Attendance: 7,200
Commentators: Jim Ross, Paul E. Dangerously

This is a double concept show and that’s not a good thing.  First of all, we have Sting vs. the Black Scorpion, a magician who claims to be Sting’s former partner and makes children disappear.  There’s also a major tag team tournament, which will dominate most of the show.  In addition to those things, this show has a very different look to it and I mean that literally. The arena is lit much better than the old arenas you would see in the 80s and it’s a massive improvement. The show looks much more modern as a result and it would stay that way for years to come. Let’s get to it.

The show is being sent to the troops in the Gulf War so we have a big presentation of the National Anthem.

Before I forget, the tag tournament is called the Pat O’Connor Memorial Tag Team Tournament. O’Connor was a former NWA Champion and a famous tag wrestler who had passed away about three months before this show. The tournament is being held in his honor.

Bobby Eaton vs. Z-Man

The Z-Man is somewhat more famous as Tom Zenk and is allegedly on a thirty five match winning streak. This is Eaton’s major solo debut after Cornette and Lane left to make their own company in Smoky Mountain Wrestling. Soon after the match begins we’re informed that Ric Flair is out of the world tag team title street fight against Doom and will be replaced by Barry Windham.

Feeling out process to start with both guys going for the arm until Z-Man jumps from the mat to the top rope and hits a spinning cross body for two. For 1990, that’s a HUGE spot. Z-Man takes him down into a hammerlock as Dangerously talks about Eaton breaking up the Midnight Express because Eaton’s partner was dating Yoko Ono. Point for a funny line if nothing else.

Eaton comes back with some hard right hands but he lets Z-Man get up instead of following in on him. A quick dropkick gets two for Z-Man and it’s back to the armbar. Eaton reverses into one of his own as they take a breather. Bobby puts him on the ramp (there’s now a ramp leading from the entrance down to the ring) but Z-Man suplexes Eaton out of the ring and onto the ramp. A BIG dive from the ring onto Bobby fires up the crowd again but Z-Man can’t pin him out there.

Back in and Ross says that Dangerously is a “psychoceramic. You know, a crackpot.” Eaton hits a quick bulldog to set up a top rope legdrop but doesn’t cover for some reason. Instead he misses a charge into the corner and gets caught by a dropkick for two. Eaton comes back with a neckbreaker but he jumps into a kick to the chest. Now Z-Man goes up, only to miss the missile dropkick, allowing Eaton to roll him up for the pin.

Rating: C+. See, THIS is the kind of match you should open things up with. It was fast paced, it was exciting, and the fans are into the show now. Eaton and Z-Man both looked good out there and the fans were way into it. St. Louis has always been a good wrestling town and they responded well to the opener which is always a good sign.

Pat O’Connor Memorial Tag Team Tournament Quarter-Finals: Steiner Brothers vs. Colonel DeKlerk/Sgt. Krueger

DeKlerk is much more famous as Rocco Rock from Public Enemy. Krueger may or may not be Matt Borne, who is more famous as the original Doink the Clown in the WWF. Their team has a military theme obviously. The Steiners are the US Tag Team Champions here and this is USA (#1 seed) vs. South Africa (#8 seed) with four Americans in there I believe. The Steiners come out to the Star Spangled Banner for good measure.

Krueger and Rick start things off with the Sergeant taking it down to the mat. Rick, a former collegiate champion, has no problem hanging with him down there and comes back with a HARD Steiner Line. Off to DeKlerk who hits a quick leg lariat to send Rick to the floor. The Colonel hits a HUGE flip dive over the top which again was unheard of in 1990. Off to Scott who by this point was a monster and was considered as a future world champion. After running over DeKlerk with a clothesline, the Frankensteiner ends DeKlerk with ease. This was barely two minutes long but the flips by DeKlerk were awesome.

Pat O’Connor Memorial Tag Team Tournament Quarter-Finals: Chris Adams/Norman Smiley vs. Konnan/Rey Mysterio

Adams and Smiley are British and the #5 seed while Konnan and Mysterio are from Mexico and the #4 seed. There’s a lot to talk about here. First of all, Adams is most famous as a trainer, having taught Steve Austin to wrestle, as well as popularizing the superkick as a finishing move in North America. Smiley would be much more famous as a comedy character later on in WCW. Konnan was nothing of note at this point but soon would become the biggest star in Mexico. Mysterio isn’t the famous version but rather the original here and the uncle of the more famous one.

Mysterio and Smiley start things off but Konnan comes in as well, only to get caught in a double armdrag. Adams comes in as well and things get very fast paced in a hurry with the Mexican team being dropkicked out to the floor. Mysterio comes back in to pop Adams in the face with a right hand, only to be superkicked HARD out to the floor. Rey tries to remember what planet he’s on so he brings in Konnan instead. Konnan climbs the top rope with a wristlock on Smiley to send him flying, only to get caught in a rolling cradle for two.

This is going too fast to be able to keep up with. Konnan gets caught in the British corner and jumped by Adams who puts on a chinlock. Mysterio comes in sans tag for an attempted double team but Smiley dropkicks both of them down. A superkick sends Konnan into a German suplex by Smiley but it’s Mysterio making the save again.

Adams comes back in to crank on Konnan’s arm some more before clotheslining him down for no cover. Back to Smiley but Mysterio comes in again without a tag to elbow Chris down. Konnan takes Adams into the corner and sits him on the top rope facing the crowd before hitting a kind of reverse suplex down for the pin to advance.

Rating: B-. This was a very fast paced and exciting match with all four guys moving faster than anyone else would have at this point. Konnan would go on to become a huge star in Mexico while Mysterio’s nephew would become one of the biggest stars in the world. Good match here though which would have had the crowds going nuts six years later or so.

Mysterio dives over the top to take down Adams post match for no apparent reason.

Pat O’Connor Memorial Tag Team Tournament Quarter-Finals: Royal Family vs. Mr. Saito/Great Muta

Muta and Saito are the #2 team and obviously are from Japan. The Royal Family are the #7 seed, from New Zealand, and comprised of Rip Morgan and Jack Victory. Morgan actually is from New Zealand while Victory is most famous for his time in Texas and ECW. Muta and Victory start things off with no one being able to get an advantage. Victory gets a shoulder block to take Muta down, only to be sent to the ramp and hit with a big dive over the top by Muta.

We head back inside and it’s off to Saito vs. Morgan with Saito taking over with a clothesline and snap suplex. Back to Victory as the fans are silent for this yet again, other than when Muta is in there. Saito cranks on the arm until it’s back to Muta vs. Morgan with Muta hitting a big spin kick to take Rip down before working on the leg. Saito comes back in and loads up a Scorpion Deathlock of all things before Victory makes the save.

Jack kicks Saito in the back and the New Zealanders take over. Once on the floor, Saito is sent into the post but doesn’t seem to mind it too bad. Back inside and Morgan misses a middle rope legdrop and here’s Muta again for the handspring elbow. Everything breaks down and Morgan accidentally knocks Victory into a German suplex by Muta to send the Japanese team to the next round.

Rating: C-. The crowd reaction here explains the problem with the entire tournament: other than the Americans and Muta, the fans have almost no idea who these people are, and therefore they don’t care. Look at the match before this. The fans have no reason to care about any of these guys so they sit on their hands for five minutes while the guys have their matches. It makes for an odd show with decent to pretty good matches, which again isn’t what you want to see at Starrcade.

Pat O’Connor Memorial Tag Team Tournament Quarter-Finals: Victor Zanigev/Salman Hashimikov vs. Troy Montour/Danny Johnson

Montour and Johnson are the #6 seeded Canadians. I’ve never heard of either of them outside of this match, which makes me think that the rankings are even more bogus than I initially thought. The Soviets are the #3 seed and neither of them ever did anything of note in the United States. Hashimikov was the IWGP (New Japan’s top title) Heavyweight Champion earlier on in his career but that’s about it. Johnson is nicknamed Bull and is dressed like an American Indian. The Soviets are both very hairy men.

Victor and Johnson start things off with Victor (like I’m going to try to type their last names over and over again) easily taking him to the mat and putting him in a bow and arrow hold. Troy breaks it up and Danny tries a headscissors, only to have Victor spin around like a madman to escape. A belly to belly suplex gets two on Bull as it’s clear the Canadians have no chance in this. Off to Troy vs. Salman with the latter easily suplexing him down and putting on an armbar, to which Troy has no idea how to react. The match ends in a submission win for the Soviets but Troy doesn’t seem to get that.

Rating: D. Blame this one entirely on the Canadians. The Soviets needed to be in there with guys like the Steiners instead of two fat schmucks that are glorified jobbers. The Soviets were fun to watch out there, but they might as well have been wrestling cardboard boxes, which is a shame.

Here are the brackets after the first round:

Steiner Brothers

Konnan/Rey Mysterio

Great Muta/Mr. Saito

Victor Zanigev/Salman Hashimikov

Terry Taylor vs. Michael Wallstreet

Wallstreet is Mike Rotundo in a gimmick where he was managed by Alexandra York. The idea was she would use a computer to figure out the perfect strategy for Wallstreet to use and figure out how much time it should take Wallstreet to win. York has said that Wallstreet should need 8:32 or less to win the match so we have a clock counting down on the screen. Taylor starts out fast and knocks Wallstreet out to the floor, causing York to bring over papers for him to look at.

Back in and Taylor puts on a headlock to slow things down as we have seven minutes left on the clock. They get up again but Taylor hits a quick clothesline for a two count. Wallstreet puts on an armbar to slow things down again before catching a charging Taylor in a backbreaker for no cover. A vertical suplex gets no cover again but a legdrop does get two. Wallstreet puts on an abdominal stretch with an illegal grab of the ropes with four minutes to go.

The referee finally catches him and breaks the hold, followed by Wallstreet missing a dropkick. A backdrop puts Michael down again and there’s a knee drop to the face for two. Taylor gets another two off a belly to back suplex before hitting his Five Arm (get it?) but York puts Wallstreet’s feet in the ropes to break up the pin. Back up and Wallstreet hits a stun gun (flapjack into a clothesline on the top rope) and the Stock Market Crash (Samoan Drop) for the pin with 1:40 remaining on the clock.

Rating: D+. Again not much to see here, but Wallstreet’s gimmick was at least original. Fortunately for him it would only be around for a few more months as he would bail to the WWF and become IRS, a tax agent. Interestingly enough, it would be Taylor who would take his place in the York Foundation which would eventually add more members.

Motor City Madman/Big Cat vs. Skyscrapers

The Skyscrapers are Sid Vicious, a Horseman at the moment, and Dan Spivey, who are two monsters who liked to destroy people. The Madman and Big Cat went after Sid on a recent Clash of the Champions, so tonight it’s a reunion with Spivey to hurt the annoying guys. It’s a big brawl to start with the Madman being sent to the apron. A double backdrop puts Cat down and a double powerbomb ends the Madman after about a minute. Total and complete domination here.

The Skyscrapers don’t want to talk to Dangerously.

Sting says he’s ready for the Black Scorpion to be unmasked.

Ricky Morton/Tommy Rich vs. Fabulous Freebirds

The Birds are Michael Hayes and Jimmy Garvin and claim to be the greatest rock and roll band in the world, meaning they come complete with a roadie named Little Richard Marley. Morton is tagging with Rich here because Gibson has a bad knee injury. Morton and Garvin get things going and it’s Morton hitting dropkicks all around, knocking both Freebirds and Marley to the floor.

Off to Hayes as the fans are all over the Birds. Michael is immediately caught in an atomic drop and we go to the floor where Gibson hits Hayes in the back, allowing Morton to ram him into the post. Back in and Hayes misses a knee drop, allowing Morton to put on a Figure Four. The Birds break up the hold and bail to the floor as the stalling continues. Garvin wants to fight Rich, but Jimmy is quickly taken down.

Marley is brought in as the Birds get beaten up again. Back in and Hayes hits his great left hand on Rich, only to have his DDT blocked. Back to Morton vs. Garvin and Ricky starts cleaning house. Everything breaks down and Marley tries to come in off the top to break Morton’s leg, only to have Gibson shove him into Garvin instead. Jimmy goes after Marley, allowing Ricky to roll up Garvin for the pin.

Rating: D. This was a glorified comedy match and not much more. Apparently the Birds were the guys that injured Gibson’s leg in the first place so there was a story behind it. The problem is that the Freebirds are almost all talk and little substance, so their matches tended to be absolutely terrible. Not much to see here but it gave the fans a breather.

Post match the Freebirds beat up Marley until Morton and Rich make the save. The problem is that allows the Freebirds to clothesline Gibson down on the ramp.

Pat O’Connor Memorial Tag Team Tournament Semi-Finals: Steiner Brothers vs. Konnan/Rey Mysterio

Everyone here is a good guy. Rick and Konnan start with Konnan trying to take it to the mat for some reason. He manages to hook a modified Indian Deathlock but Rick easily escapes and brings in Scott. The younger Steiner (Scott) wants nothing to do with this wrestling stuff and powerslams Konnan half to death. Scott puts Konnan on his shoulders so Rick can bulldog him off the top for two, bringing in Mysterio while Konnan tries to remember what his name is. Scott easily takes Mysterio down as well before it’s back to Rick, who easily counters a rana into a powerbomb to pin Mysterio. Short and dominant.

Pat O’Connor Memorial Tag Team Tournament Semi-Finals: Victor Zanigev/Salman Hashimikov vs. Great Muta/Mr. Saito

Victor and Muta start things off and they do a fast paced technical sequence with neither being able to get an advantage. Victor grabs a quick German suplex for two and it’s off to the much larger Saito. The Russian immediately takes him down in an armbar but Saito pulls him up and brings in Salman for a power vs. power match.

Salman takes Saito down and puts on a Boston Crab but Muta kicks him in the back to break it up. Back to Victor and Saito immediately puts him in a Scorpion Deathlock but he lets it go very quickly. Salman suplexes Muta down a few times so it’s back to Saito vs. Victor with the former hitting a quick belly to back suplex to eliminate the Russians and go on to the finals.

Rating: D+. This show is filled with very short matches and it’s almost impossible to care about the majority of them since there’s almost no time for the matches to develop. This is another good example as the fans don’t care about most of the people in there (because the wrestlers are total strangers) and the match is only three minutes long, so why should the fans care at all?

Doom is ready for the Horsemen.

US Title: Lex Luger vs. Stan Hansen

Hansen is a crazy Texan who took the title from Luger in October in a big upset, ending Luger year and a half reign. This is a Texas lariat match, meaning you’re attached to your opponent by the wrist and you have to touch all four buckles. Hansen jumps Luger to start and hiptosses him down but Luger comes back with right hands of his own. Stan is fine with that and beats on Luger with the rope before choking away in the corner. Lex fires off more right hands and we head to the floor for choking with the rope.

Stan gets in a chair to Luger’s back before they head back inside to slug it out even more. This is much more of a fight than a match. A clothesline puts Hansen down and Luger goes for a cover out of instinct. Instead Luger goes to two straight corners but gets suplexed down before he can get to a third. Hansen wraps the rope around Luger’s neck and drags him around to touch some buckles before Lex breaks the momentum, ending the streak.

Tired of wrestling, Hansen throws the rope around Luger’s neck and tosses him over the top rope to hang him. Well when nothing else works, go for the murder I guess. Back in and Hansen drops an elbow before touching three buckles, only to have Luger pop up with a clothesline. Stan chokes away but they go back outside with Hansen being clotheslined down and sent into the post.

Back in and Luger starts dragging Hansen around but Stan holds back after the third buckle. Lex finally pulls away and gets the fourth buckle but the referee goes down at the same time. Another referee comes out as Hansen starts touching buckles with Luger tied around the throat again. Hansen gets a third buckle as the original referee is waking up. Stan knocks Luger out and touches the fourth buckle to retain the title.

Rating: D+. As usual, these matches become the same thing over and over again: one guy gets close and then momentum is stopped, meaning we have to keep going. Hansen being completely insane helped the match a lot and Luger was still insanely popular, so the crowd was into it. That didn’t stop the match from being rather dull though.

Scratch that result actually as the original referee says Luger got the fourth buckle and is the new champion.

Tag Titles: Doom vs. Arn Anderson/Barry Windham

Doom is defending (the WCW tag titles, which are newly formed as the NWA Tag Titles are a thing of the past) and this is a street fight, meaning anything goes. The champions have unmasked since last year and now have former referee Teddy Long as their manager. It’s a big brawl to start with Simmons slamming Windham on the ramp. Arn makes the save and whips Ron with a belt as I’m barely going to be able to keep track of what’s going on here. Windham suplexes Reed in the ring for two as Simmons whips Anderson with a belt.

Reed hits Barry in the face as Anderson hits Simmons in the knee with a chair. Now Barry goes face first into the post and is busted open. Windham comes back with a belly to back suplex on the floor as Anderson is whipping Ron back near the ring. At least they’re all near each other now. Everyone but Reed gets in the ring now with Windham pounding on Simmons with a belt around his fist. Now Barry gets a chair to blast Simmons in the shoulder as Ron is taking a beating.

On the floor, Reed sends Arn into the barricade as Simmons hits a BIG spinebuster on Windham for two. Reed is back in now to pound on Windham as everyone is finally in the ring at the same time. Simmons gorilla presses Anderson down but Barry hits Ron low as he goes up top. There’s Barry’s superplex finisher but Simmons kicks out at two. Now Butch goes up top for a shoulder block on Anderson, only to get caught in a DDT by Windham.

Anderson brings the chair back in but gets it shoved down onto his own head by Simmons for two. Reed chokes on Barry with the chair but Anderson makes the save and sends Reed to the floor. Anderson goes to the middle rope but Reed saves Simmons, allowing Ron to clothesline him out of the air. Windham blasts Reed and it’s a double pin as Barry pins Butch and Ron pins Anderson at the same time, which means Doom retains the belts.

Rating: A-. Great brawl here with a bad ending. This would lead to another rematch between the two teams with Doom retaining the titles once and for all. Still though, after everything else we’ve sat through tonight, this was a big breath of fresh air and a great fight. Doom would drop the titles in a few months and split up in March.

Both teams brawl up the ramp as the fight still isn’t over.

Pat O’Connor Memorial Tag Team Tournament Finals: Great Muta/Mr. Saito vs. Steiner Brothers

There’s a special guest Japanese referee. Dangerously picks the Japanese guys because they make better cars. Scott and Muta get things going with Muta firing off the kicks to take Scotty down. Scott comes right back with a rolling leg lock into a half crab which I didn’t think he was capable of doing. Off to Rick and the fans bark (I believe I’ve neglected to mention that his nickname was the Dog Faced Gremlin) on cue. Rick Steiner Lines Muta down and it’s off to Saito for a brawl.

Rick gets pounded down so he busts out a dropkick of all things followed by a HARD Steiner Line. Muta goes up top and gets crotched as he tries to come in, keeping the advantage in America. Saito bows in respect to Rick so he kicks Saito in the face. A BIG USA chant breaks out as Scotty gets the tag to face Muta. The Great one knocks Scott back into the corner and hits the handspring elbow but an attempt at a second one results in Muta’s face hitting Scott’s boot.

A belly to belly suplex gets two on Muta so it’s back to Saito. Scott fires off some hard right hands and a back elbow to the face before it’s off to Rick, who walks into a suplex. Saito and Rick collide to put both guys down (Ross: “That was like a Ford hitting a Honda.”) but it’s Muta in off the tag. Rick is sent to the floor where Saito can ram him into the post before Muta blasts Rick in the head with a bell.

Saito whips Rick into a hard clothesline from Rick as the Japanese are playing full on heels in this match, despite being gentlemen all night. Back in and Saito comes in off the middle rope with a shot to the ribs before it’s off to a choke. Saito keeps choking long enough for Muta to come in off the top with an elbow to Rick’s back. It’s back to Muta who walks into a Steiner Line and there’s the hot tag to Scott.

A tiger driver gets two on Muta as everything breaks down. Saito hits the Saito Suplex (modified belly to back) on Scott for two and the Japanese guys hit a spike piledriver for good measure. Rick breaks up the count but Muta is already posing. A blind tag brings in Rick, who comes in off the top with a sunset flip on Saito for the pin and the tournament championship.

Rating: B-. This wasn’t terrible but at the same time it didn’t work all that well. They were going with pure American patriotism to carry the match which worked well enough given the crowd reaction, but the wrestling was only decent. The Steiners winning was the right move, unless you wanted to have the Japanese guys cheat like nuts to win and set up a future title match between the teams. Still though, not bad.

The Steiners are presented with a very tall trophy and the O’Connor family is recognized. Rick and Scott dedicate the win to the troops in Saudi Arabia. This speech allows the cage to be constructed.

NWA World Title: Sting vs. Black Scorpion

Dick the Bruiser, a famously tough guy is guest referee. The Scorpion is just a guy in black pants, a black shirt and a black mask. Behind him are two more Black Scorpions in identical attire. There’s a fourth one is in a singlet instead of a black shirt. Now what looks like a spaceship/big pod lowers from the ceiling and the Scorpion’s voice comes over the speakers, saying this is the REAL Black Scorpion. The pod opens up and we see another Scorpion in the same attire with a silver cape. He’s average size and is a white man. If he loses tonight, the Scorpion must unmask.

Both guys are in the cage now and the Scorpion is a rather spry one. There’s the bell and we’re ready to go. They lock up with the four other Scorpions at ringside watching. Sting grabs a headlock but gets suplexed out of it with ease. An elbow drop misses and the fans start chanting the name of the man who is under the mask. I’ll save it for later in case you don’t know who it actually is. The Scorpion gets in a right hand to the ribs and pounds Sting down but Sting comes back with a hip toss. Pedestrian stuff so far.

A clothesline puts Sting down and a gutwrench suplex gets two. Fans are shouting the Scorpion’s name now. Off to a triangle choke by the Scorpion followed by some choking but the Bruiser won’t allow it. Back up and a hard whip into the corner has Sting in big trouble. An atomic drop sets up a clothesline in the corner on Sting and we hit a chinlock. The Scorpion has to wrestle a very basic style to hide his identity and it makes for a very boring match as a result.

Back up again and the Scorpion pounds on Sting’s face with lefts and rights but the champion fires back. The comeback is short lived though as Sting misses a cross body and hits the cage (first time it’s been a factor) to give the Scorpion two. They get back up and the Scorpion rakes Sting’s eyes to slow him down before ramming the champion into the cage. Sting is rammed into the cage a few more times before a piledriver gets two for the challenger.

Sting starts his comeback and pounds the Scorpion down, only to be rammed into the cage one more time. A bulldog out of nowhere puts the Scorpion down and the fans pop very loudly for their hero. There’s the Stinger Splash in the corner and the Scorpion goes down. The Scorpion Deathlock goes on but the Scorpion goes into the cage.

Sting rams him into the cage and rips the mask off to reveal….a silver mask. Sting pounds away even more and whips the Scorpion into the cage a few times before gorilla pressing him into the wall yet again. A jumping clothesline puts the Scorpion down and a top rope cross body retains the title.

Rating: D. This just did not work. As mentioned, the Scorpion had to wrestle a very generic style and it’s hard to buy a generic masked guy as having a real chance against the world champion. It was nearly fifteen minutes of choking and a few shots to Sting’s back before Sting’s comeback and win. The feud sucked leading up to the match though so why should I be surprised that the match sucked too?

Post match the other Scorpions come in but Sting and the Bruiser fight them off. They rip the Scorpions’ masks off (revealing various wrestlers from the international tag teams) but the real Scorpion is trying to escape. Arn Anderson and Barry Windham run out to beat up Sting as well while the other Scorpions hold the Bruiser back. The Scorpion beats on Sting with a chair but here are Z-Man and Ricky Morton to try to make the save. The Steiners come out with bolt cutters to cut the lock on the cage and make the save for Sting. Sting comes back and rips the mask off to reveal….Ric Flair of course. Who else could it have been?

Overall Rating: D. This show comes off like an engine that has a short in it. It keeps trying to start but then sputters and dies without ever getting going. The tournament matches just cripple everything here, as they last like five minutes at most until you get to the finals and then it’s nothing special. This was a terrible year for WCW and the booker (Ole Anderson) was fired literally about five minutes after the show went off the air. Nothing to see here other than the street fight, which unfortunately is rather short.

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Monday Nitro #253
Date: August 14, 2000
Location: Skyreach Place, Kelowna, British Columbia, Canada
Commentators: Scott Hudson, Tony Schiavone, Mark Madden

We’ve gotten through New Blood Rising and now it’s time to get ready for another of WCW’s grand pay per views in Fall Brawl. Booker T. is still World Champion and now gets to defend against Kevin Nash, who survived the totally real triple threat last night. I’m not sure why but I have a feeling this show is going to be bad. Let’s get to it.

We open with Russo and Tank Abbott in the ring with Vince in full on heel mode, ranting about getting rid of someone a month ago. That piece of censored has been gone ever since and now Russo is going to make another example out of another piece of censored on live TV. Russo is here tonight to fire Goldberg on live TV.

However, Brad Siegel won’t let him do that because the fans love him. Well screw the fans and screw Goldberg. Hudson: “He doesn’t need the practice.” Tank is here to beat Goldberg up once and for all and Russo yells at some more fans. Apparently Goldberg doesn’t know the script or the storyline because he doesn’t come out. Since no one comes out, Russo tells production to go to a break. Good grief. I mean….good grief man. This is how they open the show? That’s their best idea?

We come back with a camera on the announcers and Russo demanding that they show the clip. That sends up to a video of Goldberg coming out to fight Tank during the break. Wait or is this live? Goldberg easily gets the better of it and threatens to break Tank’s arm as Russo freaks out AGAIN and demands that we go to a second break inside of twelve minutes.

Apparently Russo has booked Nash vs. Steiner tonight because last night’s match didn’t count. Again I say: whatever. Oh and Booker vs. Jarrett again.

Shane Douglas/Reno vs. Big Vito/Kidman

Before the match, Shane promises to hurt Kidman again. It’s a brawl to start of course with all four fighting on the floor and Madden freaking out over the chance of someone attacking the table. Vito easily fights out of a double team because Reno and Shane aren’t the best fighters in the world. Kidman finally stops chasing Torrie around and cross bodies both of them down. As usual we have no tagging as Vito clotheslines Shane out to the floor. Kidman gets crotched on top but Vito is able to drop a top rope elbow for the pin on Reno.

Rating: D. Total mess here as is almost the case when WCW tries to put together a match. The idea of having two feuds put together into one match is usually a good idea but the Shane vs. Kidman feud is getting tiresome and Reno vs. Vito isn’t really a feud yet. It might be nice if we were told why they were fighting in the first place but I doubt WCW knows yet.

Shane pulls out some handcuffs but gets tied to the turnbuckle for his efforts. This brings out Jindrak, O’Haire and the Perfect Event to beat down Kidman and Vito. Reno leaves with them.

The Filthy Animals want to keep up their relationship with the Cat and offer him a personal assistant named Miss Jones. I think you get the implication here.

David Flair is still covered in mud from last night. Major Gunns comes up to ask if Miss Hancock is ok but David just walks away without saying anything.

We look back at the mud match from last night as David is in the ring. He rambles about what happened last night and how scared he is. Gunns is freaking out in the back while the Misfits play cards. As David keeps going on about being scared, Gunns comes out crying, saying it’s her fault because she kicked Hancock in the stomach. David really should know that already shouldn’t he? He yells at Gunns a lot until Hancock comes out, apparently just fine after last night. Again, shouldn’t David know that Hancock is here and fine? Hancock of course says she’s pregnant and Davis is so thrilled that he struts.

Here’s Lance Storm for a match but first up he gets to address his home country. Storm says it’s good to be home and wrestling in front of some real wrestling fans. WCW has thrown people at him left and right but he keeps making them tap out to the Maple Leaf. Cue the Cat to insult the Canadian fans quite a bit. It seems that a lot of the people in WCW really don’t like Canada. Cat rips on Storm for using the Canadian rule book last night and grants Mike Awesome a rematch tonight with himself as guest referee.

US Title: Mike Awesome vs. Lance Storm

Storm is defending and Cat is referee in the first rematch from last night. Awesome charges to the ring and gets dropkicked down in the first ten seconds for a very delayed two count. A splash gets two for Mike as the fans are all over the USA. Mike drops a slingshot splash to the back for two more as this is one of the most all over the places face/heel dynamic I’ve ever seen. Storm dropkicks him down again but stops to argue with Cat, allowing Awesome to grab a German suplex.

The Awesome bomb plants Storm but Jacques Rougeau comes in to attack Cat. Mike goes to beat him up too but Carl Ouellet, as in Quebecer Pierre, comes in to double team Awesome. The Cannonball (their old team finisher) sets up the Maple Leaf. Cat gets back up but here’s Elix Skipper of all people comes out and lays him out. Ouellet grabs Mike’s unconscious hand to make him tap out with Rougeau calling for the bell.

Rating: D. So the people who are usually heels cheated to beat the cheating faces who are acting as heels with the help of a bunch of guys who may or may not be Canadian after cheating like crazy to face reactions last night. All this happened during a mostly lame match which featured a newly formed heel stable. You can add Storm to the list of things completely overbooked in Russo’s world.

Post break Storm officially forms Team Canada and hands Ouellet the Hardcore Title. Skipper gets the Cruiserweight Title, which is actually a clever way to get the titles off Storm without jobbing him (again). Cat runs in with a ball bat and says the new champions are defending their titles tonight.

WCW World Title: Jeff Jarrett vs. Booker T.

Booker is defending in another rematch from last night despite there being no real reason for Jarrett to get another title shot. No hype or anything here of course, making it feel less important than a house show main event. Booker starts fast with a clothesline but Jeff kicks him low to break up a sleeper. Jeff’s high cross body is rolled through for two, only to have him kick Booker right in the face.

We hit the chinlock on the champ for a bit before the clotheslines have Jeff in trouble. Booker’s side kick doesn’t hurt the knee (not a factor so far) so he picks up the guitar, only to hit the referee by mistake. Here’s another referee so Booker can hit the ax kick but Jeff hits him in the knee. The Stroke knocks Booker silly but here’s Goldberg to go after Jeff for the DQ.

Rating: C-. Well done on making the champion look like a loser in a match that didn’t mean anything because it didn’t need to be here on a nothing show. This could have been anyone against Jeff, or at least could have come later in the show after a few quick promos from both guys. Why do that though when you can fly through it as fast as you can?

Goldberg says that’s one down and two to go, implying Russo and……who actually?

Scott Steiner literally puts his finger in Pamela’s mouth and threatens to destroy Goldberg tonight.

Hardcore Title: Carl Ouellet vs. Norman Smiley

Carl is defending and Norman wants nothing to do with hardcore anymore. They quickly head outside with Ouellet doing as much stuff as you can do in a hardcore match. Hudson actually tries to keep track of the hardcore rules as Norman stops Carl from setting up a table. Tony one ups him by bringing up Storm’s hardcore rules from last week.

A trashcan to the head puts Norman down again and the table is set up in the corner. Norman’s comeback is quickly stopped as the announcers actually suggest that Goldberg might come out during this match. That’s so stupid I can’t even make fun of it. The table is pulled out of the corner but Norman avoids the cannonball and falls on Carl for the pin and the title.

Rating: F+. Well so much for the false hope of Norman having something new. Instead we now get to see him as the reluctant champion because it’s going to lead to comedy. Heaven forbid someone talented and over gets to move on to something important because he can still get to do something “funny” instead. At least Carl, who looked like he was in sweats sitting around the house, didn’t keep the title that long.

Nash says there’s no second chance for Steiner until Scott Hall gets his second chance.

Tag Team Titles: Filthy Animals vs. Dark Carnival

Muta and Vampiro are defending after winning the titles in an impromptu match last night. Konnan challenges Kronik for no apparent reason so here they are to do commentary. Great now we can almost guarantee a Harris Brothers appearance. It’s Juvy and Rey challenging for the titles here. The Twins jump Kronik during the champs’ entrance so we lose commentary.

Rey gets beaten down to start as the Animals take Kronik’s place, allowing Konnan to ramble on about Mexican strategy. Muta kicks Rey into the corner before it’s back to Vampiro so we can keep things dull. A Muta cheap shot stops Rey’s comeback bid and it’s Disqo trying to fire him up. They head outside with Rey staying in trouble until Vampiro kicks Muta by mistake.

The hot tag brings in Juvy to clean house as everything breaks down. Juvy gets misted and there’s the dragon screw legwhip to put him down. We’re not done with the interference though as Sting comes out (Tony to Konnan: “Was this part of your strategy?” Konnan: “Let’s see if it works and then I’ll tell you.”) and destroys Vampiro and Muta, allowing Disqo to put Juvy on Muta for the pin and the titles.

Rating: D. This was actually one of the better matches tonight until the screwy finish. That’s the story of the night: something that could be interesting is ruined by whatever overbooked nonsense that Russo has for us. At least it might mean we’re done with Vampiro and Muta as anything important, at least for the time being. That being said, was there any reason to not have the Animals win the titles last night and cut out a bunch of extra stuff?

Post break Demon wants Sting in a four corners match along with Muta and Vampiro. Cat: “Aren’t you supposed to say trick or treat?”

Cruiserweight Title: Elix Skipper vs. Kwee Wee

Skipper is defending and grabs some early rollups for two as Madden promises to deal with Gene Okerlund later tonight. Kwee Wee grabs a nice belly to back and stomps away as he’s already going angry. A suplex into the corner sends Skipper back first into the buckle (that looked good) but he’s still able to sidestep a charge and send Kwee Wee crashing out to the floor. Hudson makes sex jokes about Madden as Skipper does the Matrix move to a big reaction.

The champ gets two each off a dragon suplex and a middle rope cross body as the fans are way into Skipper here. Kwee Wee tries a suplex but Skipper kicks his feet to fall backwards, rolling into a DDT. With the referee conveniently looking away, Skipper loads up a ring, only to get caught in a Blue Thunder bomb for two. Elix finally gets in a ring shot to knock Kwee Wee cold and retain the title.

Rating: B-. Well that was a surprise. Sometimes you find a pairing that just has a good match and that’s exactly what you got here. Kwee Wee is much more character than anything else but at least he had one good match to his name here. Skipper is a great option as a high flier, especially after the division has completely died in the last few months. Match of the night by far here.

Post match Kwee Wee beats up the referee before settling back down into his normal self.

Sting vs. Demon vs. Vampiro vs. Great Muta

Officially a four corners match. During the entrances, Madden issues a challenge to Okerlund for a one on one match. Vampiro and Muta wait on the apron to start as Sting beats on the Demon. Sting takes Demon down so the other two come in with Vampiro stomping the mat, only to have Sting actually sell it. As in there was at least a foot between Vampiro and Sting but he sold it anyway. Sting fights back, gives Muta a Stinger splash and puts on the Deathlock. Demon offers to make the save but hits Vampiro with a kendo stick instead, leaving Muta no choice but to tap. Nothing match but it was more shenanigans.

Vampiro cleans house with the stick and take Sting away.

Post break Vampiro is about to stab Sting because we haven’t ripped off Undertaker’s embalming stuff yet.

Kevin Nash vs. Scott Steiner

This is yet another rematch but Nash brings out something in a box. We’ve got less than five minutes to go in the show as Nash grabs a mic. He’s seen a lot of Scott Hall signs around here lately and stops for a mostly non-existent Hall chant. Everywhere he goes, Nash has been asked what Hall is up to.

That brings him to the box, which contains a Hall cardboard cutout which says “hey yo.” Nash makes fun of it for wearing an NWO shirt and does a survey about wanting Hall back. Enough of that though as it’s time to call out Booker T. Cue the champ but Steiner runs out and blasts Booker with a pipe. Goldberg pops up on screen, holding Midajah by the hair. He loads her up for a Jackhammer through a table but the screen cuts off. Steiner runs to the back to find Midajah through the table to end the show in another bait and switch.

Overall Rating: F+. So we had a bunch of nothing matches, five title matches, four title changes (two of which actually took place in a match), the setup for Goldberg vs. Steiner and a big SHOOT out to open the show. This was another week with way too much going on because the idea of just letting stories advance as they would naturally is unthinkable around here. I’m running out of names to call the same Russo problems here and I have a feeling that’s going to become an even bigger problems as we get to even dumber stuff.

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New Blood Rising
Date: August 13, 2000
Location: Pacific Coliseum, Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada
Attendance: 6,614
Commentators: Scott Hudson, Tony Schiavone, Mark Madden

I’m really not sure what to say about this one. It’s borderline legendary in how horrible it is due to the levels of Russo pumped into it with one match in particular. I’ve seen this show a few times before and every time I watch it I can’t believe what I’m seeing. There’s no way around this so let’s get to it.

First and foremost: is there a reason this show is named after the New Blood when they haven’t been a thing in about a month at least?

As I load this up on the Network, I keep expecting some warning to pop up telling me it’s not worth it.

The opening video shows Jeff Jarrett breaking a bunch of guitars over various people. Then we cover the real main event of Goldberg vs. Kevin Nash vs. Scott Steiner in what is being teased as a shoot. As opposed to all the other matches which are worked shoots you see. This one is going to be a REAL shoot.

In an odd camera shot, we see the New Blood Rising logo in the corner of the arena but it’s quickly covered by pyro from one of the ring corners. Who shoots from there?

3 Count vs. Jung Dragons

This is a double ladder match for 3 Count’s recording contract as well as their gold record. Tank Abbott is with 3 Count and has a shirt with the nipple areas cut out for no apparent reason. So 3 Count wants the record because it’s theirs and the Dragons want the contract so 3 Count can never record again. I’m not even going to try to make sense out of this mess. Oh and you have to tag in a ladder match.

Jamie and Shane get things going but everyone realizes that this is a ladder match so they sprint up to the entrance to make this interesting. Shannon makes a quick save on Yang as Tony thinks he’s going for the gold record because the ladder is hung underneath it. Ignore the fact that the contract is on top of the record so he’s under both of them. Yang gets crotched on a ladder in the corner as the fans are way more quiet than they should be for a six man ladder match.

Shannon splashes Yang and covers for a second because no one understands the rules of this mess. Three straight splashes crush Yang against a ladder in the corner as Scott asks the stupid question of what label is on the contract. Yang gets up again, only to be down onto the top rope. This hasn’t been his night so far.

3 Count goes outside so Jamie can hit a huge dive for a good reaction. We get a second ladder so Shannon can pull Yang off with a sleeper drop. Shane neckbreakers Jamie off as well, leaving Evan to suplex Kaz down to put all six on the mat in a heap. Yang gets a ladder superkicked into his face but the Dragons come back with a pair of spinwheel kicks to get one of their only advantages.

Kaz charges into a powerslam on the ladder as Evan seems to have a bad ankle. Shannon does a springboard over the top to catapult the end of the ladder into Jamie and Shane’s faces. That always looks sick. Shannon is thrown back in and gets splashed by two Dragons, allowing Jamie to grab the gold record. Not that it matters as Tank knocks him out and steals it back, earning himself some homophobic chants.

Evan gets crushed between a ladder as Tony yells at Madden for not understanding the logic behind this match. Jamie powerbombs Shannon off the ladder but Tank shoves over both ladders to take out a member of each team. Evan climbs up and gets the contract for the win (I guess?).

Rating: B. Enjoy this one people because it’s the last good match you’re going to see for about two hours. These six guys would give the fans everything they could and then be asked to do it again week after week because WCW didn’t care about any of them. I know Russo’s mantra continued to be about pushing the young guys, but giving them the same matches over and over again without letting them get anywhere isn’t a push. Still though, fun stuff here, even if it was nothing compared to what Edge and Christian and company were doing at the time.

Tank leaves with the record and the contract.

The Filthy Animals want to referee the Tag Team Title match. As in four referees in an eight man match. On top of that, they want a shot tomorrow night. Rey promises to make sure Cat beats Great Muta as an incentive.

Great Muta vs. The Cat

Cat talks some trash and hits Muta in the head with the mic to get things going. Some kicks set up a dancing elbow (I love Rock but good night I wish the People’s Elbow wasn’t copied so much) but Muta grabs the arm as Hudson talks about the “legitimate heat” between these two. Tony goes on about how lame “the marquee says wrestling” line is as the fans want Bret. Cat fires off some strikes but is mesmerized by the power of Muta’s bald spot, allowing Muta to kick him back down.

Cue Tygress (fans: “WE WANT PUPPIES!”) as Cat kicks Muta out to the floor. Back in and they hit each other a few more times until Muta snaps off a dragon screw leg whip to take over. Muta misses the moonsault but sprays green mist at Cat. This isn’t a DQ for whatever reason, allowing Tygress to hit Muta with a chair for two. Instead Cat fires off a bunch of kicks for the pin.

Rating: D-. Standard Nitro match here (yeah a D- is pretty standard these days) with Cat showing why he should almost never be in the ring. He’s a great talker but that doesn’t mean he’s anything more than a guy who kicks a lot. Muta continues to look bored and I still don’t know why they brought him back in.

So we’re just under half an hour into the show and it’s been quite watchable to this point. That’s about to fall apart.

Buff Bagwell can’t find his mom.

Buff Bagwell vs. Positively Kanyon

This is Judy Bagwell on a pole, which means Kanyon drives her in on a forklift. See because she’s a bit overweight. For reasons that I’ll never understand, Kanyon wanted Judy to be his Kimberly. Kanyon calls her a battleax a few times until Buff finally figures out that his mom is on a freaking forklift in the arena.

Buff runs out to throw Kanyon over the barricade to start the fight in the crowd. I’m assuming you win by pin here but I doubt Russo ever got past “so we put her on a forklift.” They get back to the ring for the opening bell and Kanyon grabs a middle rope Russian legsweep for two. Kanyon cuts off the turnbuckle pad because this doesn’t have enough going on yet.

Buff jumps into a sitout Alabama slam for two and we hit the chinlock. The Kanyon Cutter is broken up and Buff drops him forehead first onto the exposed buckle for two. Now the Kanyon Cutter connects for two…..and here’s David Arquette, who hits Buff with a hard hat for two. A double Blockbuster is enough for the pin on Kanyon, winning Judy back for Buff…..I think?

Rating: F. The match itself was watchable at times but they brought David Arquette back for a two minute cameo. This was like watching a movie with a gorilla in a top hat and tails standing in the corner doing nothing. Judy on the forklift was such a distraction and really didn’t change anything, making the match a combination of boring and WHAT AM I WATCHING. In other words, the Russo Special.

Arquette gets a Kanyon Cutter post match.

Lance Storm arrives with a police escort. You would expect Storm to arrive on time.

Goldberg isn’t here due to a motorcycle accident. And so it begins.

Tag Team Titles: Kronik vs. Perfect Event vs. Misfits in Action vs. Sean O’Haire/Mark Jindrak

Kronik is defending, Rection and Cajun are representing the Misfits and the Filthy Animals (as in Mysterio/Disqo/Tygress/Juvy are ALL guest referees). Konnan sits in on commentary to give us a ridiculous thirteen people involved with one match. Before the match Disqo threatens everyone, saying he has the authority to have them wrestling polar bears in Nome, Alaska if they step out of line.

Palumbo and Adams start things off as Disqo is the in ring referee. Chuck is quickly sent to the floor so it’s off to Stasiak, who walks into a full nelson slam. Cajun vs. Jindrak now with Mark taking over via some technical stomping as the fans loudly chant…..something. O’Haire comes in to punch Clark, followed by a nice spinning kick to the head for two. A hard slam drops O’Haire but Disqo counts slow.

Rection comes in and gets a slow count as well as there are far too many empty seats opposite the hard camera. Tygress gives Rection a Bronco Buster but the General raises his boot to block Rey’s attempt. We get the Sting falling headbutt/low blow spot on Stasiak before it’s back to Cajun for the dancing punches. That means another slow count as the announcers have no idea whose side the Animals are on.

Rection comes in and starts cleaning house as everything breaks down. Palumbo’s great right hands stagger Rection and it’s off to a sleeper. Disqo checks the arm twice and slaps Rection in the face to wake him up. Palumbo superkicks Rection back down as the fans want Bret again. It’s off to Cajun who is quickly sent outside as everything breaks down again.

The Seanton bomb nails Clark but here’s the Dark Carnival to break up High Times to Palumbo. Clark gives Palumbo the Meltdown for the slowest two count yet so he yells at Disqo. High Times plants Palumbo again but here’s Lieutenant Loco to steal Disqo’s shirt and count the pin, thereby screwing over the Misfits in the process to keep the titles on Kronik.

Rating: D-. What in the world did I just watch? Instead of anything resembling a regular match, this was a bunch of quick segments with Disqo tying everything together (work with me here) until Chavo ran in for the completely illogical ending. I get the idea that Disqo wanted to give the Animals the easiest match possible tomorrow night but this was just WAY too much for what they were going for.

Jeff Jarrett accuses Pamela of wearing Okerlund out last night. He’s been looking for Booker all day long and the champ better have eyes in the back of his head.

Shane Douglas vs. Kidman

Strap match with wins via pinfall. Before the match, Shane says Kidman isn’t man enough to keep up with Torrie all night long (which is nothing like the story of X-Pac vs. Kane with X-Pac using the exact same line about Kane and Tori in a storyline that aired earlier in the year). Kidman ties up the legs to start and Shane is rather irritated. A legdrop gets one for Kidman as Madden goes over the benefits of having a shirt on here.

In one of the funniest and at the same time saddest moments of the show, the announcers try to make fat jokes about Torrie based on that video from Monday. How do you even keep a straight face on a line like that? Shane crotches him with the strap and chokes a bit, followed by the reverse Hennig neck snap (which is actually a cool move). Torrie gets in some choking of his own and it’s off to a knuckle lock of all things.

Since it’s just a knuckle lock, Kidman comes back with a hurricanrana out of the corner and the Low Down gets two. Kidman finally gets smart and takes Shane’s shirt off, meaning they can actually start using the strap for a change. Torrie accidentally hits Shane in the face with a shoe for a near fall, followed by the Pittsburgh Plunge to Kidman for the same. A quick Kid Crusher (Killswitch) gives Kidman the pin.

Rating: D. Another match where there was no need for a gimmick because Russo doesn’t get how to actually run matches. Kidman getting the win was good but the Torrie factor is really starting to drag. The stuff where she used to be with Kidman was fine but I’m supposed to care that she used to be overweight? It doesn’t quite work when she’s a bombshell and one of the best looking women ever in wrestling.

Kidman spanks her with the strap so Shane hangs him in the corner, drawing Vito out for the save. Reno sneaks in from behind and gets beaten up by Vito as well.

Booker arrives and Jarrett attacks him by slamming Booker’s knee in the car door.

Miss Hancock vs. Major Gunns

Rip off the Camouflage and of course there’s mud. An early slap starts the catfight and Hancock does a Muta handspring elbow. Madden gets right to the point and says he wants to see these two lose their clothes. Gunns gets a jackknife cover for two in the ring because the rules are still all over the place. Hancock rips off the top to reveal more camouflage and I’m sure you get the idea here.

After a facebuster gives us the upskirt shot, Hancock loses the bottom half of her dress to reveal camouflage shorts. A cross body gets two for Hancock but she charges into a foot to the stomach. Hancock misses a cross body and goes to the floor holding her stomach. Oh here we go.

Gunns gets posted and Hancock rips off the shorts to reveal a swimsuit bottom. They head up the aisle with Hancock losing her top. Gunns gets sent into the mud and drags Hancock with her as Madden is calling himself daddy. Hancock gyrates a bit and goes down holding her stomach again, allowing Gunns to get an easy pin.

Rating: F. Do I really need to explain this one? The women looked good in their outfits but they’re horrible in the ring and the ending made it even worse. This stuff stopped being interesting a long time ago because EVERYTHING is an angle. You get numb to this stuff after a while and we passed that point nearly eight months ago with Russo.

David Flair dives into the mud to check on Hancock. To get this over with as quickly as we can: yes she was supposed to be pregnant and yes Russo was probably going to be revealed as the father because in Vince Russo’s WCW, he gets to sleep with Miss Hancock. Of course this is treated in the serious voices and made to be something real. Yes really real.

The Dark Carnival wants Demon to prove himself.

The announcers are all serious again and use Hancock’s real name to make sure this is as shooty as possible.

Sting vs. The Demon

Sting repels in from the ceiling and wins with the Death Drop in less than a minute, which included a brawl in the aisle.

Vampiro and Muta come in to beat down Sting. Kronik comes in for the save as Demon walks by the brawl. For no logical reason, Kronik offers to put the titles on the line tonight.

Booker’s knee is being worked on.

US Title: Mike Awesome vs. Lance Storm

Storm, with a bit of a mouse under his eye, is defending and gets the big Goldberg entrance. You can see that Storm is really proud to be here as he talks about getting to wrestle in the greatest country in the world tonight. The extra security is due to his hatred in America and he’s worried about a terrorist attack in the back. It’s not his fault that he threatens the American illusion and he defeats another American hero tonight. As for this match, he’s using rule 32B of the Canadian rule book to appoint a special referee: Jacques Rougeau! As in the Mountie! And not Bret Hart!

After a full rendition of O Canada (which is a big deal here and “not a work” according to Tony), we’re ready to go with Madden in tears. Rougeau will be the outside referee as Awesome hammers away, only to be sent shoulder first into the post. They head outside and Awesome loads up a table, drawing the required ECW chants.

Storm drives him into the barricade for a break but Awesome snaps off a belly to belly back inside. Mike slips off the top to a lot of jeering but quiets the fans down with a wicked sitout Awesome bomb for the pin and the title. That was a VERY close pin and Rougeau says no, which actually seems fair in this case.

We’re not done yet though as Rougeau has the Canadian rule book, which says you need a FIVE count. I didn’t know King Kong Bundy was Canadian. Tony: “Did this happen when we were in Toronto last year?” Awesome slams him for three before grabbing a dragon sleeper of all things for the tap out. I think you know where we’re going here.

The book says a title match is pinfall only so the match continues. Mike throws him down with a release German suplex and a slingshot shoulder gets four. You can imagine how screwy this must be for everyone involved. The Awesome splash gets give to give Awesome the pin (and Storm’s third job in about eight minutes) but this is Texas Death rules (in Canada?) so after a pin, Storm has until ten to get to his feet.

Mike throws a table in but gets chaired in the back for four. In theory wouldn’t you want the five count so you can have another eight or nine seconds to get up? Both guys go up and something like a belly to belly superplex puts both of them through the table. Rougeau rules that the first person to their feet by ten (huh?) wins. Mike is almost up first so Rougeau punches him out at seven to keep the title on Storm.

Rating: C-. I actually didn’t hate this as you could clearly see the idea they were going for. Now it was stupid to have Rougeau as the referee (Heidi would have actually made more sense) and to have the champ job that many times in one night, but there was at least an idea here. The bigger problem here of course is that Awesome didn’t cheat so Storm keeps losing over and over, but the live crowd was going to eat it up anyway. It’s over thinking as always, though it’s nowhere near as bad as it could have been. The action itself worked too so this was actually easy to watch.

Oh and here’s Bret Hart after the match for the Canadian pride moment. You know, because BRET HART would totally go for something like this. I’ve always thought that’s why he didn’t do the referee job here. Can you imagine Bret standing for something this stupid?

Nash doesn’t buy Goldberg’s motorcycle story and says he’s going over Steiner and getting the title back.

Tag Team Titles: Kronik vs. Dark Carnival

Kronik is defending in case you didn’t see them enough earlier tonight. Tony brings up Canadian rules and Madden slips up by saying Vampiro is from Canada, making the whole thing even screwier. Clark shoulders Vampiro for two to start and a big powerbomb gets the same. Muta gets choked in the corner and it’s back to Vampiro to get powerslammed for two.

It’s off to Adams and the villains start in on the leg….which goes nowhere as it’s quickly back to Clark for the Meltdown. For some reason there’s no cover so Muta mists the referee by mistake. Vampiro breaks up High Times but the Harris Twins of all people return to give Clark an H Bomb, setting up the moonsault for the pin and the titles.

Rating: D-. Good grief I can’t stand Vampiro. Every time I see him in a match, cutting a promo or just being there in general I can’t stand him. Now he gets a title, though given how insane this division has been lately, I can’t imagine him holding onto it for that long. The worst part here is the Harris Twins vs. Kronik, which could set a new standard for horrible.

Booker says Jarrett will have to kill him to take the title. Don’t hate the player, hate the game. As usual, this is a feud that is totally fine and has told a completely acceptable story of the old champion getting annoyed as the new star. The knee injury is find for a plot point to advance the story as well. However, almost no one remembers this because of how ridiculous the rest of this show is, which is really a shame.

Quick recap of the triple threat match, which is designed to look like a SHOOT. Not a “shoot”, but a SHOOT. They’ve been arguing over who has to do the job (using that term) and it’s going over the heads of 99% of the audience who just wants to see people fight.

Kevin Nash vs. Scott Steiner vs. Goldberg

The winner gets the title shot next month. No Goldberg to start due to the motorcycle accident. Tony tells us to pay extra attention to see if there’s anything out of the ordinary. Nash takes him outside to start and sends Steiner hard into the barricade. Here’s a taped up Goldberg about a minute in to go after Nash with a chair. With Nash down on the floor, Steiner clotheslines Goldberg and drops an elbow for two.

Goldberg comes back with a flying shoulder and the Bret Killer kick, drawing Nash up from the apron for a big staredown. Hudson tells stories about Starrcade 1988 (yes 1988) when Nash was on the booking committee and put himself over Goldberg. Steiner comes back in to save Goldberg and gets two off a belly to belly. Tony interprets Steiner yelling at the referee as him not being on the same page with everyone else.

Goldberg suplexes Steiner down but Nash clotheslines them both. A big boot drops Goldberg but the Jackknife is broken up. It looked like a simple counter but IT’S A SWERVE because it’s really him not following the script. Russo, in his MANLY sleeveless shirt, tells Goldberg to get back in but Goldberg walks to the back.

The announcers freak out that this is Goldberg not following the script, even though it looked like a pretty basic counter to the powerbomb. I love how we’re supposed to buy Kevin Nash and SCOTT STEINER as the professionals here. Tony: “What are they going to do now? Improvise?” This is just so bizarre to hear because it’s clear that they’re trying to sound like they’re shooting. There are shows where you can hear the raw audio and it sounds NOTHING like this, mainly because the announcers aren’t very good actors.

Midajah comes out as Steiner takes Snake Eyes. The referee goes down and Midajah hits Nash low to give Scott two. Nash fails at a DDT and goes after Midajah so Steiner grabs a sleeper. That goes nowhere so Nash kicks him in the face and the Jackknife is good for the pin. And that’s a shoot of course.

Rating: F. I can’t get mad at this. I’m trying and I just can’t do it. Stuff like the Hogan stuff last month and the Russo destroying Flair nonsense makes me angry but this was just……dumb. This felt like seeing a kid do something he wasn’t supposed to do and then listening to the ridiculous explanation that they come up with to try and get out of it. Instead of getting mad at them, it’s almost amusing to see them trying so hard to be clever and leaving so many holes in the story along the way.

I don’t think I have to explain why this was stupid and why it completely defeats the point of professional wrestling in the first place, but I really can’t get mad at it. Maybe it’s the shoot interviews that set it up or maybe I’ve just reached the point where Russo isn’t worth getting annoyed at anymore. It’s one thing to yell and rave about something stupid when it’s clearly for one person’s (namely Russo) benefit. Instead, this felt like Russo actually thought he had a good idea but he’s too stupid to realize how bad it was.

After sitting through the first two hours of this show, there are so many other things to get mad at. Like Judy Bagwell on a pole for instance. That felt much more cruel and low brow than this because it was all about Judy’s looks. The Hancock stuff is stupid because it’s not something I’m ever going to believe. This on the other hand felt like they were trying for something interesting and just failed, which is a lot harder to get mad about. It’s still stupid, but Judy Bagwell on a Pole is the far more infamous moment for a reason: that was lame and stupid whereas this was more a failure, which I can live with much easier.

Finally, this is a rare occasion where watching the TV leading up to it helps a lot. They basically said “yeah we’re going to do something stupid” for the last three weeks and then this is what we got. With the Hogan vs. Jarrett mess last month they treated it seriously and then did the stupid shoot. This time they basically advertised a screwy finish and you were watching to see how bad it was. On top of that, as lame as it was, you actually got a match. Steiner vs. Nash isn’t great but it’s better than “pin me, pay me.” It was a lame idea and didn’t work for most of the fans, but this could have been WAY worse.

Tony throws us to the recap video for the World Tag Team Title match, meaning Booker vs. Jarrett. I guess it’s the Andre the Giant coming out in him. We’ve covered this already: Booker won the title last month so Jeff is trying to get it back by injuring Booker’s knee in advance.

WCW World Title: Booker T. vs. Jeff Jarrett

Jarrett is challenging and Booker’s knee is in horrible shape coming in. Booker fights out of the corner to start and quickly takes it to the floor to send Jeff into the barricade. Back in and the champ crotches him against the post (Madden: “That’s a walk down Slapnuts Boulevard.”) but the missile dropkick hurts his knee again. You know you don’t have to ask Jeff to work on a limb twice so he wraps the knee around the post.

A chair shot crushes the knee even more and Booker gets caught in a half crab. That goes as far as a half crab is going to go so Booker grabs the spinning sunset flip out of the corner for two. A double clothesline puts both guys down and the knee is suddenly fine enough for an ax kick and Spinarooni. There goes the referee and Jeff blasts the knee with the guitar. Jeff grabs a bad looking Figure Four for WAY too long until Booker grabs the rope. The referee breaking the hold ticks Jeff off so we get a second ref bump.

Booker’s knee is fine again and they set up a table at ringside, only to have Booker do something like a Book End off the apron through said table. Jeff hits the new referee with a chair and then Strokes Booker onto the chair for two from a fresh ref. Booker tries a neckbreaker which turns into a Diamond Cutter (to be fair how often do you see a main event swinging neckbreaker?) onto the chair for two. The Book End retains the title.

Rating: C. This was fine, albeit overbooked. Booker vs. Jarrett is a good example of a pairing that really doesn’t need a lot of extras on the side and they would have been better just having a wrestling match. The ref bumps got annoying in a hurry but that’s the main event style of the time. Not a great match or anything, but it really needed to be something more simple.

The fans bail out immediately and pelt trash into the ring to end this mess.

Overall Rating: F+. I’ve heard this called one of the worst shows of all time, maybe even THE worst of all time and it just isn’t that bad. I wouldn’t even call it the worse show of the summer as Great American Bash offered NOTHING of value. This show had an entertaining opener and a totally fine main event which more than make this a better show than some of the others of this era.

Now that being said, this is another disaster on Russo’s watch because he can’t just leave well enough alone and let the show work. It’s not a good show but for the most part everything goes by fast enough (longest match is the main event at just under fifteen minutes) that it doesn’t really infuriate me. Stuff like the Judy Bagwell match and the Canadian Rules match (which at least got a really good reaction) are really more things you just roll your eyes at and move on to the next match.

The show is really bad, but its reputation is far worse than it actually is. At least with this one you have some entertaining matches and a feeling that they’re trying to do something positive instead of flipping the fans off and laughing at them for not getting behind the ideas. There are still WAY more problems here that need to be fixed and this show was horrible, but somehow it’s an improvement over some of the other stuff they’ve done this year.

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Thunder
Date: August 2, 2000
Location: Hulman Center, Terre Haute, Indiana
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Stevie Ray, Mike Tenay

New Blood Rising is almost here and these shows just get worse and worse. Monday was another show where it felt like WCW was mad at us for watching them and were trying to get rid of as many remaining fans as they could. I don’t want to imagine how bad Thunder could get. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Lance Storm to open things up. Just like he did with the other titles, he’s renaming the Cruiserweight Title to the Canadian 100 Kilograms and Under Championship. That brings out the Cat to say that Storm is defending a title tonight. Storm: “Which one Cat? I’ve got a bunch of them.” Cat thinks the fans want to see title matches so tonight Storm is defending the Cruiserweight Title against Juventud Guerrera, the Hardcore Title against Norman Smiley and the US Title against the Cat himself. It’s time for the first title defense because why not have it now when you could build it up for later?

Cruiserweight Title: Lance Storm vs. Juventud Guerrera

Storm is defending and Cat dances to the Filthy Animals’ music before leaving. We’re still not ready to go though because Storm has a rule booklet saying that this has to be under Scientific Rules. Therefore, the rest of the Animals have to head to the back. On a side note, shouldn’t this be Chavo getting his rematch instead of Juvy? Storm jumps Juvy to start but gets caught in a bad looking hurricanrana to send him outside. A big flip dive over the top takes Storm down again but he avoids a high cross body back inside.

Not that it matters as Juvy drops him again and gets two off a falling springboard splash. He loads Storm up on top for a hurricanrana, which Stevie describes as “setting up a move here.” Storm stops a charge with a boot in the corner, only to walk into a bulldog for no cover. Instead it’s something like White Noise for two on Storm but he quickly counters a hurricanrana into the Maple Leaf to retain.

Rating: B-. Storm really can do no wrong at this point but I haven’t seen Juvy going this hard in a long time. This was a really fun fast paced match with some good looking high flying and a solid ending as Storm continues to be the best thing going in WCW at this point. How he avoided being screwed up for so long is beyond me but he pulled it off.

The announcers show us a clip from after Nitro with Kronik running in to save Booker and Sting. As in the Sting WHO WAS LIT ON FIRE and seems to be fine.

General Rection yells at MIA as he always does.

Booker arrives and Tony is shocked to see him limping.

Smooth the limo decides Skip Over needs a better name.

Here are Miss Hancock and David Flair with something to say. Hancock asks if she’s the kind of woman who would roll around in mud for a dollar. She thinks the mud might make Major Gunns look better, so here are the Misfits to interrupt.

David Flair vs. Sgt. A-Wall

Wall starts fast with a powerslam and some stomps. David tries chops and stops to strut with the expected result of being launched out to the floor. A chair doesn’t make things any better as Wall punches it into David’s face. Back in and a chokeslam through the table ends David quick.

The Nitro Girls are here (because of course they are) when an unnamed man (soon to be named Reno) comes in to yell at Siren. She says she was with the girls on Monday but here’s Shane Douglas to tell him where she really was. We can’t hear what he says but Reno isn’t happy. See, if you insist on using the Nitro Girls in stories, this is the better way: have them as plot devices to advance stories instead of having them be the story.

Skip Over gives Terry Taylor a piece of paper and Terry says he’ll make it happen.

Jeff Jarrett wants to talk to Vampiro about their elimination tag tonight but Vampiro isn’t all that interested.

Tank Abbott has written a new song for 3 Count. Freaking sweat!

Kidman vs. Elix Skipper

Apparently the paper was the new name, which also includes the moniker “Prime Time Player.” Kidman isn’t a fan and baseball slides him out to the floor. Back in and Kidman sends him into the turnbuckle but Skipper debuts the Matrix move to avoid a cross body. A headscissors puts Kidman down, only to have him come back with a dropkick to the face. Cue Shane and Torrie as Kidman grabs the BK Bomb, only to have Reno come in and lay him out with a rolling cutter (Cross Rhodes). Skipper adds the Rocker Dropper for the academic pin.

Cat promises Mike Awesome a title shot at New Blood Rising if he wins the title tonight. Point for tying up a potential loose end at least.

Shane is in the back again and calls Judy Bagwell a redneck. Bagwell attacks and they’re pulled apart.

Sean O’Haire vs. Shawn Stasiak

Chuck Palumbo sits in on commentary and we look at him as the match starts in the ring. We finally start watching as O’Haire nails a superkick, only to miss a charge in the corner. That means it’s time for generic heel offense a go-go from Stasiak as he chokes and elbows while Stevie talks about ballet for some reason. Stasiak’s Death Valley Driver is countered into a DDT but his comeback is cut short as he’s sent out to the floor.

Palumbo loads up the exercise bar but Stevie pulls him back into his seat. Stasiak gets two off a PerfectPlex (northern lights suplex according to Tony because he’s too distracted arguing with Tenay over Stevie’s level of coolness) as Jindrak and Palumbo fight at ringside. O’Haire pops back up with a spinwheel kick and the Seanton Bomb for the pin.

Rating: D+. O’Haire has talent but he’s certainly still best as part of a team at this point. Stasiak on the other hand would be better off as a driver’s education teacher somewhere in Oklahoma. The guy simply does not have it in the ring and it’s getting more and more annoying to watch him every time he gets in the ring.

Gene Okerlund is in a neck brace while talking to the Bagwells. Buff wants Shane tonight and makes jokes about his performance issues from last week. Judy swears a lot because it’s funny.

Hardcore Title: Lance Storm vs. Norman Smiley

Storm is defending and Big Vito comes out for commentary. The Canadian flag comes down again but the music stops halfway through, allowing Norman to come out with the American flag. We’re not ready yet though as the Canadian rulebook says the title has to be defended with no weapons and the match can only end via submission. Storm isn’t pleased with his dancing challenger so they trade wristlocks instead. A pinfall reversal sequence doesn’t go anywhere so Norman elbows him in the face.

Norman stops to dance though, allowing Lance to come back with a nice dropkick. Vito sounds annoyed that Norman is wrestling in a shirt but Smiley’s splash hits knees. The swinging slam sets up the Big Wiggle but the referee gets bumped, allowing Storm to hit Smiley with the American flag. The Maple Leaf retains Storm’s title.

Rating: C-. See, this is a story that makes sense and is being played out logically. Storm is a guy capable of winning any single match on his own but he needs to cheat when he has so much to do. That’s a logical, well written character and it makes for a good story. As I said before, Storm is one of the best things going today and the simple storytelling is a big reason why.

Vito comes in to break up the hold.

Torrie threatens to sue Judy if she gets in her face tonight.

Shane Douglas vs. Buff Bagwell

Bagwell starts fast by hammering away in the corner and grabbing a swinging neckbreaker. A Vader bomb gets two on Shane so Torrie trips Buff, allowing Shane to get in an atomic drop. Shane snaps (work with me here) off Three Amigos and a powerslam, followed by the Pittsburgh Plunge for two. Torrie throws in a chair so here’s Judy to start a catfight. Kidman runs in and dropkicks the chair into Shane’s face, setting up the Blockbuster to give Buff the pin.

Rating: D. These two just do not have very good chemistry together, though there’s far worse out there. The Kidman and Torrie stuff helps but Shane really isn’t the most interesting guy in the world. It doesn’t help that Buff is almost even less interesting and it’s probably about time to turn him heel again because he’s been a face long enough now.

Post match Torrie goes after Judy again but here’s Kanyon to help beat down Mama Bagwell. Buff makes the save but walks into a Kanyon Cutter onto the chair. Mike Awesome makes the real save.

After a break, Buff gets off the stretcher and says he wants to fight Kanyon tonight. Awesome says he’ll do it himself. Apparently Mike thinks Judy is good looking.

Sting tells Booker that he doesn’t have to fight on that bad leg but Booker wants to take out that sucka.

The Vince Russo interview will not air tonight because “WCW management” won’t allow it. One of the few things they actually build up and then oh forget about it because we’ve changed our mind.

Mike Awesome vs. Positively Kanyon

Awesome has one of his women with him. More interestingly though, Tony says that tickets are going on sale for Nitro on August 28 two days from now. They’re only starting to sell tickets 24 days in advance? Tickets sold for that event: about 4,600 out of about 13,000 seats. I’m sure there’s no connection there. Before the match, Mike reiterates that Judy is good looking.

Kanyon actually charges in so Awesome runs him over with a clothesline. Commentary goes silent for a bit and comes back talking about the three way at New Blood Rising. Stevie actually brings it back to focus as Kanyon hits Awesome low to slam him out of the corner. A sitout spinebuster gets two for Kanyon and a neckbreaker out of the Tree of Woe (not a Kanyon Cutter Tony) gets two more.

Kanyon lays out the referee for no apparent reason and gives a photographer (As in a guy holding a camera and taking pictures. Stevie: “Is that a photographer?”) a Kanyon Cutter. Some more production guys get the same but here’s Judy with a loaded purse to knock Kanyon silly, setting up the Awesome Bomb to give Mike the pin.

Rating: D+. Not the worst match here but Awesome’s gimmick is killing him. Kanyon’s cutters all over the place continue to be entertaining but they need to have Page come back and Diamond Cut him in half at some point. Given that this is WCW, I’d bet on them joining forces because Page respects him now or something.

US Title: Lance Storm vs. The Cat

Storm is defending one more time. Cat interrupts the national anthem one more time and kicks Storm in the face. Back in and they slug it out with Cat taking over before taking Storm down with a low blow. That’s rather lame of him. Storm’s sunset flip is broken up by dancing, a crotch chop, and a shot to the face. You can’t say Cat is just going through the motions out there.

They head outside with Storm superkicking him to take over, followed by the springboard missile dropkick (looks great as always) back inside. Cat comes back with a Feliner to knock Storm into the referee, allowing Great Muta to run in and give Cat one of the best looking dragon screw legwhips I’ve ever seen. The Maple Leaf gives Storm the easy submission.

Rating: C-. It was clear that Cat hadn’t wrestled that often and that he really shouldn’t be very often these days. He wasn’t going to be able to last much longer and that really shouldn’t be the case just four minutes into a match. Storm wrestled three matches tonight and was in better condition than Cat who wrestled once. That really shouldn’t happen but Cat didn’t wrestle much at this point so it’s a bit more understandable.

The good guys in the main event promise to win because the other four guys are player haters.

WAY too long video on Gunns vs. Hancock.

Vampiro tells Demon he’s on his own at New Blood Rising and that he wants nothing to do with Jarrett after tonight.

Jarrett calls Gene a broke neck slapnut.

Booker T./Sting/Kronik vs. Great Muta/Vampiro/Demon/Jeff Jarrett

Elimination tag. Booker is limping badly on the way to the ring. It’s a brawl to start with the good guys cleaning house and Booker’s knee being strong enough for a side kick to the face. Muta sneaks in and goes after Booker as we hear about Sting being on Vampiro with a chair. Of course we can’t see that but we do get to see Adams cleaning house inside.

High Times eliminates Muta in just over a minute. Again: why did he bother to come back? Cue Cat to go after Muta as the referee breaks up High Times to Jarrett through the table. That’s fine with Kronik as they chokeslam the referee instead, earning themselves a double elimination. Sting gets triple teamed by Jarrett, Demon and Vampiro as the match actually settles down.

Jarrett lures Booker in so they can…..not cheat in the slightest. It’s off to Vampiro to stay on Sting until a double clothesline puts both of them down. Booker comes in to pound on everyone, including an ax kick to Demon. Jarrett bails and gets counted out, followed by double finishers to give Sting and Booker the double pin to wrap it up.

Rating: D-. Leave it to WCW to give us a six minute Survivor Series match with one person walking out, two people getting disqualified and three pins. As usual, the match went by so fast that it didn’t have time to mean anything and the action that we got was mainly chaos with a quick wrestling portion at the end. Of course they couldn’t cut ANYTHING else out to give this more time either.

Overall Rating: D+. This wasn’t their worst show ever and amazingly enough it was a show centered around a wrestler wrestling. It also helps that the Russo interview didn’t air, which was false advertising but probably a lot better than whatever nonsense Russo would have gone on about in his talk. The less said about the upcoming triple threat the better and it made for a much easier show this week. Not good mind you, but easier.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of Wrestlemania at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Monday Nitro #251
Date: July 31, 2000
Location: FirstStar Center, Cincinnati, Ohio
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Mark Madden, Scott Hudson

I made the mistake of believing that things might be turning around and this is what I get for it. The whole place has gone nuts again with Russo’s ideas turning it into more of a circus than a wrestling show and no one seeming to know the difference anymore. The main event tonight is Sting challenging Booker T. for the World Title. Let’s get to it.

We open with an In Memory Of graphic and a ten bell salute for Gordon Solie. That’s always a bit sobering.

Video on Booker becoming champion and having to fight all comers. Jeff Jarrett has injured Booker’s knee and beat him in a hardcore match on Thunder because WCW does stupid things like running the World Title match on Thunder before the pay per view. Or pushing Jeff Jarrett as a World Title contender.

Earlier today, Booker came to work.

Pyro.

Here’s a limping Booker to open things up. He talks about his wife being here and she doesn’t seem to like him saying that he’ll die before he gives up the title. The people here are the reason he got the title shot because they would not be silenced. Last week the fans voted for Sting vs. Booker T. but Bill Goldberg interrupted. Tonight however, the fans are getting what they wanted to see. That’s what they’re getting tonight because it’s time for war. Actually I’m pretty sure it’s because Cat booked it on Thunder but no one watches that show.

This brings out Jeff Jarrett because we haven’t been bored enough yet. Jarrett: “Let me drop the bomb on your mom!” Jeff doesn’t think there’s going to be a title match tonight so Booker corrects the catchphrase and starts the fight in the aisle. They get in the ring and Jeff gets in a shot to the bad knee and a chair shot to the head. We get a JARRETT SUCKS chant from what sounds like a crowd roughly three times the size of the audience here as Jeff puts on the Figure Four over the apron.

Sting comes in for the save with the ski mask on, which he thankfully pulls off after throwing Jarrett out. He helps Booker up and says he’ll take that title shot if Booker is still ready later in the night. Jeff says we’ll have Slapnuts Theater and blasts Booker’s wife with the guitar. Again: THE MATCH WAS ALREADY BOOKED! Stop acting like this is some spontaneous thing.

Post break Sting tells Booker to go to the hospital while he deals with Jeff.

Buff Bagwell vs. Big Vito

Judy comes out with Buff as they continue to set up the Judy Bagwell on a Pole match, which has been officially set. I keep wanting to think that’s a bad dream that I’ll wake up from one day but it’s really happening. Judy is even sitting in on commentary here to make things even better. Buff starts fast with his normal offense, including a dropkick and swinging neckbreaker.

Vito gets in a cheap shot as Buff looks at his mother because Buff is dumb enough to keep bringing her out here. They head outside for a bit and Buff thinks a production guy is Kanyon in disguise. That just earns him a Mafia kick back inside but Buff pops back up with the double arm DDT for two. An innocent cameraman goes to get a shot of Judy so Buff goes for the save, allowing Vito to get a breather. Back in and Buff’s sunset flip is countered to give Vito the pin.

Rating: D. This is another Russo trope: stories that don’t work unless one of the people involved is just plain stupid. There is no reason for Judy Bagwell to be out there as she could just stay at home but in order for this story to work, she has to be here every week. Nothing match here but it’s nice to see Vito do something other than hardcore nonsense.

Kwee Wee asks Cat for the match but completely snaps when he gets turned down. Cat gives him the match to get rid of him, calming Kwee Wee right back down.

Kanyon wants Judy Bagwell as his valet so she can be his Kimberly. If she’s good, she can be a Nitro Girl. He loads up a Kanyon Cutter on Pamela but Gene Okerlund of all people tries to make the save, only to take the cutter himself (off camera of course).

After a break, Buff runs in and finds Kanyon, giving him a double arm DDT on the floor. For once, a wrestling move actually makes sense.

The Artist vs. Kwee Wee

Artist is in a t-shirt and jeans to prove his manliness to Paisley. It’s a brawl in the aisle to start as Madden makes unfunny jokes about Kwee Wee’s non-existent wife. Artist pounds him down to start but Kwee Thesz presses him down and fires away. A nice dropkick and backdrop put Artist down and it turns into a slugout. Artist lifts him up by the hair and drops him back down, only to have Kwee pound away again. Madden: “This Kwee Wee is like a flamboyant Lou Thesz!” A tilt-a-whirl into a sitout faceplant is enough to put Artist away.

Rating: D. That’s it for Artist in the ring and I don’t think many people are going to miss him. The story never worked and the wrestling wasn’t much better, making him one of the lamer people WCW had on its roster for a long time. Kwee Wee ranges somewhere between stupid and offensive (much closer to the former) but this was a very different time and in Russo’s mind, this was comedy.

Post match Kwee Wee, in a much deeper and more serious voice, says people won’t like him when he’s angry.

A ticked off Scott Steiner breaks into Cat’s office with a pipe. Cat clears off his own desk before Cat can do it. Steiner doesn’t want to hear that Booker isn’t here so he makes a pipe match with Booker in the back for later.

Norman Smiley actually hits on Midajah and gets destroyed by Steiner. This was a five second segment.

The MIA declare war on Team Canada. Rection isn’t pleased with Loco’s war face.

Cruiserweight Title: Lieutenant Loco vs. Lance Storm

Before the match, Storm talks about hardcore wrestling being garbage. Therefore, he’s renamed the Hardcore Title as the Saskatchewan Hardcore International Title. On top of that, he wants this company to be named World Canadian Wrestling. This time O Canada is cut off by the Misfits’ theme and we’re ready to go in a hurry.

Storm snaps Loco’s throat across the top rope as Rection and Cajun join commentary. Back in and Loco grabs a quick spinning DDT (Cajun: “MISFIT STYLE!”) but tries to flip out of the corner and twists his ankle. Storm loads up a powerbomb and Loco tries to counter, only to get pulled down into the Maple Leaf to give Storm his third title.

Rating: C-. No time to go anywhere of course but the idea of giving Storm a third title is interesting. They’ve certainly made him feel like something special, but now comes the obvious problem of how to get them off him without making him look like a loser. Loco needs to get back in the title hunt though as I was digging his title reign with the safe and well done matches after months of Artist putting everyone to sleep.

Since Storm is young and successful, here’s Kevin Nash to interrupt. Storm gets in his face so Nash drops him with a big boot. Back from a break and Nash is still in the ring, making that attack completely pointless. Nash talks about two people working themselves into a shoot and brings up Goldberg’s comments about him last week. There’s only been one time in this business where he hasn’t been professional and it was the night after someone refused to lose to him in Montreal.

Yeah he played basketball and then he was a bouncer. There were some nights on the job where the NFL players came in and had to be beaten into place. When they get to Vancouver, there’s no guarantee that he’s going to be a professional. Finally, he’s going to get Scott Hall back here no matter what. Cue Scott Steiner to say he doesn’t care about Goldberg or Nash. The fight is on already and security quickly hits the ring.

Post break, Nash demands a match with Steiner. Cat just happens to have a straitjacket so go have a straitjacket match.

Jeff Jarrett vs. Sting

This is called impromptu even though they’ve been talking about it all night. Sting wins an early slugout but misses the Stinger Splash. That’s not a major problem though as he clotheslines Jeff out to the floor and follows him up the ramp with a chair. Much like all the criticism and snores from the audience during his matches, promos, appearances and everything else, Jarrett shrugs the shots off and crushes Sting’s knee against the post with the chair.

We hit the Figure Four over the apron until the referee does his job and breaks it up. Here’s Sting’s comeback until Jeff kicks the referee low and hits Sting in the head with a chair. The referee, having just been kicked low, actually counts the cover for two. Why have referees at this point? Sting flips out of a reverse suplex and grabs the Death Drop “onto” the chair for the pin.

Rating: D+. Horrific refereeing aside, that’s a loss for the World Champion and a loss for the #1 contender in the span of five days. Of course we now get even more weeks of Jarrett challenging for the title because he was hand picked as the challenger whether we’re interested in it or not. Lame match because as usual, WCW does a bunch of stupid stuff instead of letting them have a match.

Booker is back and isn’t happy that Jarrett was sent out in an ambulance.

Tag Team Titles: Kronik vs. Vampiro/Great Muta vs. Mark Jindrak/Sean O’Haire

Kronik is defending and comes out first while Perfect Event is on commentary. Jindrak and O’Haire are smart enough to let everyone else fight. The painted ones are knocked to the floor and it’s Clark vs. Jindrak to get things going. The champ takes over with a hard clothesline until Mark nails a high dropkick. Clark plants him with a Rock Bottom but Vampiro breaks up the pin and takes Jindrak’s place.

A top rope clothesline puts Clark down, leaving Muta and Vampiro to pound away at the same time for no logical reason. Clark fights them off again and makes the hot tag to Adams so house can be cleaned. Muta goes after Adams knee but Clark hits him in the back with a chair to break it up. Everything breaks down and O’Haire drops the Swanton on Vampiro, only to have Adams get in a quick pin on Muta a half second before, keeping the titles on Kronik.

Rating: D+. It’s another mess of a match as is so often the case in WCW but at least the ending was pretty hot. There are way too many teams going after the belts at this point though and it’s getting to be too much to take. Just let them fight one at a time and put the titles on whoever you want to put them on.

Muta and Vampiro mist the champs and take the belts.

Cat gives Shane Douglas a Viagra on a pole match against Kidman tonight.

Jindrak and O’Haire say this isn’t over.

Kidman vs. Shane Douglas

Viagra on a pole. Seriously. Before the match, Shane thinks this is stupid. Well at least he still gets the obvious. Shane goes after Kidman to start but gets backdropped out to the floor, followed by a baseball slide into the steps. Back in and Shane kicks him down as Madden talks about Viagra on a pole matches from years past.

Shane rolls some suplex and puts on a chinlock as we’re waiting on the first attempt to go up. The Pittsburgh Plunge drops Kidman and Madden stays on the sex jokes. Kidman gets up though and hits a quick Kid Crusher (Killswitch), allowing him to get the bottle. Torrie offers a distraction though and Shane grabs a Franchiser, allowing him to steal the bottle for the win. I’m assuming that means he also deals with the legal issues of handing out what were probably prescribed pills.

Rating: D. As usual, this was a big mess with the pole only being an excuse to let them have a lame match. I still don’t know why I’d want to see these two fight again but the match was pretty generic stuff. These two could have a good match if you just, you know, let them, but that’s out of the question.

Booker asks Sting if they’re still on. Sting is ready and Booker says this is for the people.

Miss Hancock and Major Gunns get in a food fight in the back to start their “hardcore match”. In the ring, A-Wall beats up David Flair until the women come in. I guess this is a match now.

Major Gunns vs. Miss Hancock

Hancock throws her into the table Wall set up for a pin. I have no idea how long this actually was and I really don’t think anyone cares. Well Russo does as I’m sure this is another fantasy of his for whatever reason.

The Nitro Girls like Kidman after the Viagra match.

Scott Steiner vs. Kevin Nash

Straitjacket match meaning you put your opponent in a straitjacket and beat on them until you get tired of it. Those are Cat’s official rules. Nash gets in a quick side slam for a cover but there’s no referee as there are no covers. Instead Nash goes with the boot choke but Midajah gets on the apron, allowing Steiner to hit Nash low. The belly to belly sets up the pushups as the announcers plug an interview with VINCE RUSSO on Thunder.

They head outside with Nash being sent into the barricade (I think they’re shooting here!), only to pop up and fire off right hands back inside. Steiner takes a chokeslam and a Midajah chair shot has no effect on Nash. That earns Midajah a Jackknife (Madden: “Her head is between his legs!”) but Nash has to kick Rick Steiner in the face. Scott hits Nash with the chair and the straitjacket goes on. Scott puts on the Recliner for the win.

Rating: D-. What do you expect from Scott Steiner vs. Kevin Nash in a gimmick match with Rick interfering? They kept it short but that doesn’t mean it’s something interesting. I’m still annoyed at Nash for beating Storm down earlier tonight though so I approve of him taking a beating.

WCW World Title: Booker T. vs. Sting

Booker is defending and limps to the ring as the announcers plug Russo’s interview again. Note that Goldberg and Nash’s interviews weren’t plugged but they’re just not as important. They trade shoulders and hiptosses to start and Sting can’t get either early Deathlock attempt. It’s time to go outside with Sting sending him into the barricade, only to have his top rope splash hit knees. Thankfully Booker sells the knee, only to pop up for an ax kick for two.

They hit heads and Sting falls to the floor, only to have someone pull him under the ring. Someone who appears to be Demon (Sting’s opponent at New Blood Rising) shoves a bloody Sting back out and he elbows Booker in the face a few times. Sting gets two off a DDT but the Death Drop is countered into the Bookend to retain Booker’s title.

Rating: C. Imagine that: you give two of the most talented guys in the company a few minutes and they have one of the better matches of the night. They’re doing a really good job of building Booker up as a main event star as he’s pinned Goldberg and Sting in back to back weeks. Of course he lost to Jarrett in the middle but you can’t win them all, even if you’re World Champion.

Post match Sting goes after Demon but Vampiro makes a save. Jarrett comes out to blast Booker with a guitar before tying a rope around the knee to hang Booker upside down. At the same time, Sting is put in a coffin which Demon sets on fire with a torch. Jarrett cracks another guitar over the knee to end the show WHILE STING IS BEING BURNED ALIVE. Yeah that’s just background noise now. In WWE it sets up a Wrestlemania showdown. In WCW it sets up Jeff Jarrett attacking Booker T.’s bad knee.

Overall Rating: D. If Sting being burned alive not closing the show isn’t enough to sum this show up, I don’t think anything is going to. You couple that with the Viagra on a pole match and a food fight between the women and it’s clear that Russo is back at his Russoiest. There’s just too much stuff going on here and little of it is worth seeing. One of the few things that was worth seeing was Lance Storm but Nash literally threw him out of the way so we could set up a straitjacket match as part of the reality angle that the world is clamoring for. There’s your latest reason why WCW has less than eight months to go.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of Wrestlemania at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Thunder
Date: July 12, 2000
Location: North Charleston Coliseum, North Charleston, South Carolina
Commentators: Bobby Heenan, Tony Schiavone

It still feels weird to say that Booker T. is the World Champion but it’s a nice feeling to have. For once things feel fresh and with the addition of the newcomers in the tag division, there’s an actual youth movement going on around here. Now unfortunately there’s no reason to think this is going to last but at least we can enjoy it while it’s around. Let’s get to it.

On a side note, at some point around this time, Ed Ferrara took over Thunder’s booking. Therefore, Russo isn’t to blame in case this is awful, though Ferrara was Russo’s right hand man.

Opening sequence.

We open with the usual clips from Nitro.

Smooth gives Kanyon advice about something we aren’t privy to.

Apparently Scott Steiner beat up and injured Mike Tenay so it’s a two man booth tonight.

Here are Tank Abbott and 3 Count to say they’re going to dance and the Dragons aren’t going to do anything. That’s an official warning and you know what’s coming. Tank heads outside to dance and here are the Dragons for a surprise attack. Muta jumps Tank and we’ve got a match.

3 Count/Tank Abbott vs. Jung Dragons/Great Muta

Yang tries to pound on Tank but gets thrown across the ring. A wheelbarrow slam into a double facebuster has Yang in even more trouble but Muta makes a save and cleans house. Tank uses the circle to block the mist and the big right hand knocks Yang silly to give Evan the fast pin. So they bring Muta in for a two minute match where his team loses?

Kanyon gives Cat a copy of his book in an attempt to get Jarrett tonight. That’s fine with Cat as Jarrett’s original opponent, Buff Bagwell, is late. Cat gives him the match in exchange for an autograph.

The Perfect Event attacks the Misfits in the back. For reasons unclear, they hand Major Gunns their exercise bar and she hits Palumbo low. Stasiak laughs, so Gunns kicks him low for good measure. So they’re bad wrestlers and stupid?

Stevie Ray is joining commentary. This could be good.

The Demon vs. Major Stash

Stevie thinks Vampiro and Demon are bizarre and doesn’t get why they’re together. In other words, Stevie either doesn’t watch or doesn’t understand the stories either. Stash starts with a big boot but charges into a boot in the corner. You would think he would have learned something like that. Demon gets thrown off the middle rope but comes back with a wristlock. Yeah a wristlock from a guy named DEMON. Stash avoids a clothesline and hits a quick ax handle, only to walk into the Love Gun for another quick pin.

Post match Sting (right) appears and points the bat at Vampiro and Demon.

Kidman asks Lance Storm about being serious. Storm says he’s always serious and walks off. After Kidman leaves, Kanyon takes out a cameraman with a Kanyon Cutter.

David Flair tells Hancock that he’ll do anything for her. Hancock knows that already.

Kidman/Lance Storm vs. Mark Jindrak/Sean O’Haire

The Canadian national anthem plays so Kidman reads the paper and dances behind him. Lance finally catches on but doesn’t seem to mind as he and Kidman try stereo baseball slides to the floor. That goes as badly as Kidman’s dancing as Jindrak and O’Haire press them over the top and back inside. Kidman tags himself in for a Bodog to Jindrak so it’s off to Sean for some right hands. Everything breaks down and O’Haire superkicks Storm, leaving Jindrak to plant Kidman with a tilt-a-whirl slam. The Seanton Bomb gives Sean the pin, making me wonder why they got pinned by Morrus and Leroux a few weeks back.

Storm nails Kidman post match, I’m assuming to cement his heel turn.

Vampiro promises to rip off Sting’s ski mask. I’d like to see who is actually under there.

Vito talks about how awesome he is.

Hancock tells David to go win her some gold so he attacks Vito and it’s time for a title match.

Hardcore Title: Big Vito vs. David Flair

Vito is defending of course and David is in a suit minus the jacket. He pounds Vito into the arena with whatever he can find as this is one sided so far. Vito remembers that he’s fighting David Flair and takes over with right hands, only to get suplexed into the ring for no cover. Cue Hancock (with blue trim instead of white this time) as Vito comes back again with a suplex and top rope elbow. He stops to kiss Hancock though (perk of being a champion), followed by the safety cone to the crotch. The impaler DDT through the table retains Vito’s title.

Rating: D. I’m assuming these are supposed to be serious matches, which continues to prove that the people running WCW don’t understand how wrestling works. They’re certainly not funny matches but there’s nothing setting them aside that makes them entertaining. That black hole of charisma Steve Blackman is Hardcore Champion in the WWF right now and he’s a dozen times more interesting than this. Vito isn’t bad or anything but there’s nowhere to go with this division.

Jarrett tells Cat that if he’s not fighting his scheduled opponent, he’s not wrestling. Cat says oh yes you are.

Perfect Event was posing in the ring earlier today (as in before the fans were here) when Kanyon attacked another production guy. It’s still funny, but is this going anywhere anytime soon?

Perfect Event vs. General Rection/Corporal Cajun

Palumbo and Rection get things going with the General scoring off some splashes in the corner. Cajun comes in and gets beaten down due to reasons of not being very good. Things slow down with Stasiak doing one of his only moves (a slam) before stopping to pose. Palumbo’s top rope shoulder drops Cajun for two again as Stevie is being the voice of reason against all of Perfect Event’s stalling. A gorilla press doesn’t work though and the hot tag brings in Rection to clean most of the house until the Jungle Kick slows him down again.

Stasiak gets two off a sitout powerbomb and the fans are actually getting into this. It could be due to it being the longest match of the night, even though we’re not five minutes in yet. Cajun comes in for his dancing punches and a clothesline for two. Whiplash gets two more and everything breaks down. Rection hits his moonsault but Stasiak nails the referee with the exercise bar. He throws it off to Cajun though and the referee sees him holding it for the DQ. Yeah he said Rection had the match won but Cajun broke up the pin for no apparent reason. Egads this company is stupid at times.

Rating: D. The match wasn’t bad until the ridiculous ending. Rection and Cajun aren’t the best tag team in the world but then again this isn’t the best tag division in the world either. Palumbo is the most interesting out of all these people and he’s just ok at best. The ending hurts this even more though as it comes off again like someone doesn’t know how wrestling works.

Here’s Booker T. with something to say. Booker talks about how great Jeff Jarrett is in the ring but he fails as a man. This title can be defended anywhere anytime and he’ll take on anyone that wants to come after it. As for Scott Steiner, save the drama for your mama. This brings out Rick Steiner to congratulate Booker but it’s a ruse (does it could if everyone knows it’s coming?) and Rick beats him down. Cue Stevie to get up from the table for the save but Rick beats him down, grabs the title and puts it on. Good night what a horrifying visual. Mike Awesome runs out and makes the save before handing the title back to Booker.

Daffney asks Crowbar if she looks fat in her gear. Crowbar says she’s pretty and clearly has a thing for her.

Shane Douglas assures Torrie that she won’t have to do anything in the mixed tag.

Cat tells Kidman that if he doesn’t interfere in the upcoming match, he can have Lance Storm later tonight.

Torrie Wilson/Shane Douglas vs. Crowbar/Daffney

Before the match, Shane says Torrie isn’t a wrestler and has no business in this match. Torrie apologizes to everyone in the back but she LOVES being franchised. Crowbar quickly dropkicks Shane to the floor, leaving Daffney to go after Torrie. We get the catfight for all of ten seconds before it’s back to the guys. That goes nowhere so it’s back to Torrie who gets caught by Crowbar. Back to Daffney for some lame hair drags (read as Torrie rolls while Daffney touches her hair) and a jawbreaker to Shane.

Crowbar comes back in to beat on Shane even more, including a nice bite to the head. Shane avoids a moonsault and grabs a powerbomb, but just stops as he’s got Crowbar in the air. It looked closer to a jackknife but Shane stopped moving instead of letting him go. In other words, it looked awful. Shane loads up another and Crowbar lands on his feet (there’s your answer), only to walk into the Franchiser (landing on his feet instead of his knees) for the pin.

Rating: D-. Instead of a match, this was much more like a series of quick segments cobbled together. As usual, the women have little business being in a ring and it shows even worse each time. Daffney is a great character but not very good in the ring here and certainly not good enough to carry Torrie. Shane……I still don’t get it. Not at the actual wrestling at least.

Daffney takes a Franchiser (and takes it better) after the match.

Cat gives Awesome Rick Steiner tonight, even though Booker wanted the match.

Here’s a sitdown interview with Scott Steiner. He doesn’t want to talk about Bash at the Beach but Tenay keeps at it until Steiner says Nash isn’t his friend. What Scott did felt right at the time and he doesn’t care about Scott Hall’s family or the fans out there. Steiner goes on a rant about Booker getting the title and then about Tenay calling the Frankensteiner the hurricanrana. Scott doesn’t like Goldberg either and would have beaten him up if Goldberg was smart enough to get into the University of Michigan.

Tenay says Steiner has a lot of hatred bottled up and asks if it dates back to his childhood. That’s enough for Steiner and he chokes Tenay out. Tenay deserved that as he was flat out badgering Steiner here and trying to sound all tough. Then you bring up the guy’s childhood? You earned that beating.

The Dragons try to go after Cat again but this time he ducks and lets them hit each other. Kaz gets put in a fireman’s carry and spun around so he hits his partners. Funny but just like the Kanyon Cutters: is this going anywhere or is it another joke for Russo and Ferrara’s amusement?

Lance Storm vs. Kidman

Kidman jumps him in the aisle but gets caught in the corner with some dropkicks. Heenan: “You know a lot of people are talking about this Lance Storm.” Stevie: “I haven’t heard them.” Storm loads up a chair in the corner but gets small packaged for two instead. A hurricanrana staggers Storm but he backdrops Kidman out to the floor. Storm’s northern lights suplex gets two and a superplex gets the same. Kidman tries a rollup but gets kicked into the chair for his efforts. Like most of the schnooks in this company, Storm tries a powerbomb and eats a faceplant for the pin out of nowhere.

Rating: C-. The match was fine but really uninteresting as you had two guys doing moves to each other and then one guy won. Certainly not bad or anything but I never cared about what happened. Then again I’ll take not caring over wanting to jump off a bridge any day on this show.

On a side note, one of the people that could actually powerbomb Kidman was La Parka. I know he’s been gone for awhile, but that powerbomb got me thinking about the people who aren’t around at this point. You can really see the cost cutting coming into play as a lot of names who had been around for a long time have just disappeared.

Buff Bagwell and his mom Judy finally arrive. Buff leaves her in the car (dude come on) and here’s Kanyon to volunteer to show her around. You can see a look in his eye.

Back from a break and Judy is in a neck brace and being taken away in an ambulance. Oh I would have loved to see her take that move.

Rick Steiner vs. Mike Awesome

Awesome elbows him off the middle rope to start and there’s a BIG section of empty seats opposite the camera. As in like twenty of them. That’s just horrible. After a quick trip to the floor, Rick kicks him low (which the referee could clearly see) and shouts a lot. Steiner loads him onto his shoulder and rams him into the buckle, followed by a German suplex for two. Mike grabs an Alabama Slam for two and the camera reveals even more empty seats in the corner. A belly to belly superplex gets two for Rick and he yells at the referee a lot, allowing Mike to grab a rollup for the pin.

Rating: D. Awesome was trying and Rick looked better than he had in a long time but he’s still a horrible excuse for a wrestler who can barely do anything without looking like he has no idea what he’s doing. I’m hoping Rick isn’t in for a full time return here as I was just getting over watching him help screw this company up last year.

Rick stays on him post match until Booker makes the save.

Positively Kanyon vs. Jeff Jarrett

Booker is on commentary and this is now the #1 contenders match all over again. Jeff gets an early two off a backslide and Kanyon gets the same off a small package. Kanyon is annoyed at the pace of the count (a very common complaint tonight) and has to settle for a top rope Fameasser. Jeff bails to the floor so Kanyon points at Booker, allowing Jarrett to get in a suplex on the outside. Both guys are whipped into a variety of metal objects with Kanyon getting the better of it.

The sitout Alabama slam gets two but the swinging book misses, allowing Jeff to DDT him onto the book (Heenan: “I’ve seen the book kill a lot of guys.”) for two. The referee won’t let Jeff use the guitar and a book shot gets two with Jeff going to the ropes for the break. Now it’s Jeff’s turn to go after Stevie and Booker, triggering a brawl. Bagwell comes out to attack Kanyon but security pulls him away, allowing the Stroke to put Kanyon away and send him to New Blood Rising (again).

Rating: C. As usual when you let talented guys have a match, it usually winds up being entertaining stuff. This was one of the better matches of the night (again due to having some time) and the ending made enough sense, but it’s still nothing that I’ve going to remember in a few minutes, which is another one of the major problems with this era.

Jeff and Booker yell at each other a lot to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. This was a weird one with a lot of the Russo tropes coming out but at a much slower pace. That leaves you with a very odd show that isn’t really interesting but feels more like a collection of bad matches. I’d put this above the Russo shows due to more coherence…..and that’s about the end of its positives. Neither guy knows what they’re doing and it gets more and more clear every time I watch one of their shows. I’ll take Ferrara over Russo for now, but Terry Taylor and Kevin Sullivan are sounding a lot better every single day.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of Wrestlemania at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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This might be the easiest all year.

2014 was actually a really good year for pay per view for the most part. I couldn’t think of a show that I didn’t like at least to a degree. I know a lot of people didn’t like Battleground but the Usos vs. Wyatt Family was a GREAT match and the four way main event really picked up by the end. Things got far worse later in the year, but most of 2014 was a solid effort on pay per view.

And then there’s Bound For Glory. Now here’s the thing: TNA tried something here. I can certainly give them credit for trying SOMETHING new, but to call this experiment a disaster is the nicest thing I can say about it. The matches ranged from forgettable to WHY AM I WATCHING THIS with the opener being the best match on the card. I don’t actually remember what the opener was, but I remember it being watchable. I can tell you the brackets for the Wrestling Classic in 1986, but I can’t tell you who was in a match I saw two months ago.

Most of the show felt like a tribute to Team 3D, who were inducted into the TNA Hall of Fame. Now Team 3D had been involved in a great three way feud with the Hardys and the Wolves, giving us more than one Match of the Year candidates. Therefore, the solution was to give them a tag match against the random pairing of Tommy Dreamer and Abyss in a run of the mill brawl. Why bother having a great match when you can have an average one?

Great Muta, who had appeared once or twice in TNA, was the star of the main event and got to pin Sanada before Team 3D made the save to end the show. Of course that ended the show. Not the World Champion (not on the show), the guy he beat for the World Title (also not on the show) or the guy he was feuding with (you get the picture by now).

On top of that, there were two title matches on this show, which cost you $50. Those would be the X-Division Title and the Knockouts Title, the latter of which was defended in a glorified squash match. Now flash back with me to the 4^th of July and Global Impact Japan, a One Night Only event (which weren’t considered for this because I think I’m the only person that watched them). That show had three title defenses and two title changes for $15. When a filler show has a better card, more title matches, more significance and nearly four times the attendance than the biggest show of the year, you can tell something is off.

Bound For Glory was an attempt at something, but it was a halfhearted attempt. It became very clear that the show was for the Japanese fans instead of the American fans, but I can’t imagine how this show did them much good in Japan. It wasn’t entertaining, it didn’t mean anything, and it messed with one of the few good things TNA has going for it. Bound For Glory was, by far, the Worst Pay Per View of the year.