Impact Wrestling
Date: November 8, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz, Todd Keneley, Jeremy Borash

Last week’s big moment was the unmasking of Luke Gallows who doesn’t actually have a name at this point. Other than that we had Gut Check and the announcement of a three way for the #1 contendership. Odds are tonight is mostly about Aces and 8’s, but that’s pretty much all you can expect to get on Impact anymore. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the announcement of the triple threat. The guy who takes the fall can’t get a title shot until BFG next year, which is a nice idea actually. We also hear about Aries vs. Hardy being a ladder match. Aries: “IT WAS JUST A METAPHOR JEFF!” Those things are just about the world title match though, so now let’s focus on the important thing: ACES AND 8’s! And that guy who we don’t have a name for yet but is more famous as Luke Gallows!

Aces and 8’s are yelling at Gallows, who is now named Doc (Director of Chaos), because he lost his mask before he was even made a full fledged member of the team. Tonight it’s Doc/D-Von vs. Angle/Sting. This sums up the major problem with the reveals so far: how in the world am I supposed to buy D-Von and Luke Gallows as a legitimate threat to beat Sting and Angle, two of the best of all time?

AJ Styles vs. Bobby Roode

Storm is on commentary. They fight for control of a wristlock to start before heading to the mat. Roode appears to have gotten a haircut. He blocks AJ’s drop down/kick sequence but AJ sends him to the floor with ease. Styles sends him into the steps and drops a knee back inside as Storm says he would pin Roode if he had to pick. There are ads on the mat now too, which is fine as it brings in some extra cash.

A big backdrop puts Roode down but Bobby gets in a shot to the back to take over. We take a break and come back with Roode hot shotting AJ on the top rope. A Blockbuster gets two for Roode as does an elbow drop. Storm says he’d work with Roode to beat AJ if necessary. I can see the “BEER MONEY REUNION???” posts already. Roode hooks a chinlock for a bit but AJ fights up and hits an enziguri to put both guys down.

We head to the corner with AJ pounding away but getting guillotined on the top rope to slow him down. The disadvantage lasts about eight seconds as AJ comes back with a top rope rana for two. The Clash is escaped and there’s the spinebuster from Roode for no cover. The spear misses though and AJ rolls him up into a Styles Clash position, but Roode kicks him in the head to escape. Pele misses and the fisherman’s suplex gets two for Bobby. Really good sequence there.

Bobby goes to the floor for a chair but Storm comes down to take it away from him. Styles hits a BIG springboard dive to take Roode out but stops to yell at Storm. Back in, AJ loads up another springboard but Roode knocks him off the ropes and gets a fast pin at 10:50 shown of 14:20.

Rating: B. Solid match here and for a TV match, this was great stuff. AJ and Roode have good chemistry together and when you can beat AJ Styles clean on TV, you’ve got something going for you. As for the PPV, you have to think Roode wins, but PLEASE don’t let Storm get pinned. There’s no reason to keep him out of the title scene for ANOTHER year as he never got a real run with the belt anyway which he’s more than capable of doing.

Aries runs into Hogan in the back. Aries complains about the ladder stipulation so Hulk says that if Aries doesn’t give the belt back by the end of the show, Aries loses his title shot.

We run down the remaining card for the show when the feed starts messing up. The screen says “An Ancient Evil Awakes”. Abyss maybe?

Angle is talking to Wes Brisco about timing when Sting comes up. Sting wants Brisco watching their back in the main event tonight. Are we really supposed to not get that Brisco is a member of the team? It’s obviously him given the hair, but are we supposed to not notice it?

Joseph Park is in the ring and after asking if it’s ok for him to talk, he says his body isn’t meant to go through tables and he loved the feeling of taking off Doc’s mask. His legal partners don’t want him to have a match with Aces and 8’s but he has to be a man. First though we have to make the pilgrimage to Mt. Hogan to beg for the match though, because if Hogan’s ego doesn’t get stroked every other segment, that’s just not cool brother.

Here’s Hogan who says that Park is a great guy but he got lucky last week instead of being good. Before Hogan can say no though, here’s Ray with an interruption. Ray says Park isn’t a fighter but he has a lot of guts and a lot to prove. The Bully believes in Joseph Park and so do the fans. Bully to Hulk: “Why say no when it feels so good to say yes?” It’s that mentality that led to the sex tape issue brother. Hogan says just this one time and shakes Park’s hand.

Tara hits on Jesse, who says that he used shooting star presses and a super double tiger driver last week. ODB comes in to yell at the two of them and wants a handicap match next. Jesse: “We’re going to need A LOT of hand sanitizer.”

AJ rants about Storm when the Cowboy comes in.

ODB vs. Tara/Jesse Godderz

Tara and Jesse actually skip down to the floor. They don’t have to tag here so ODB beats up both of them at once. Jesse gets rammed into ODB’s cleavage and there’s a double noggin knocker. A double elbow puts ODB down before Tara raves over the bicep a bit. ODB slams them both down and avoids a charging Jesse. Tara gets sent into his crotch and it’s a double bronco buster. ODB spears Tara down for the pin at 2:40. I smell a tag match Sunday.

ODB gets beaten down with a flask shot post match. Jesse pours the contents on her body.

Post break, ODB is on the phone with Eric’s voicemail and says the tag match is on.

Apparently on Thanksgiving, all of the Gut Check winners will be there. Oh joy.

The Gut Check judges have a chat. Taz thinks it’s a no brainer but doesn’t say which side he’s on. This goes on for awhile and Snow’s jacket gets made fun of.

Sting/Kurt Angle vs. Doc/D-Von

Before you ask, no I don’t be calling him DOC in all caps. Seriously, it makes zero difference so spare me the arguments that I’m saying it wrong. Tenay and Taz take over on commentary. The brawl starts on the floor with Angle destroying D-Von and Sting doing the same to Doc. Sting and Doc start in the corner and Sting hits a quick DDT for two. A D-Von distraction lets Doc hit a clothesline to take over as things get down to normal.

Off to D-Von who drops an elbow for two before bringing Doc back in. A suplex gets two and it’s off to the chinlock. That goes nowhere so D-Von drops a leg for two. Angle gets punched in the face to break up a tag and D-Von pounds Sting down in the corner. A Doc splash gets two as Angle makes the save. Back to D-Von for the spinning elbow for two as Aces and 8’s are using REALLY basic stuff so far.

Doc and Sting clothesline each other down and there’s the hot tag to Angle. House is cleaned and it’s a German for Doc and the Slam for D-Von. Everything breaks down but as Sting puts Doc in the Deathlock, D-Von hits Sting and Angle with the ball bat for the DQ at 5:41.

Rating: D. Nothing to see here as the match existed to get to the end. Like I said earlier, it’s really hard to buy these guys as threats to a team like Sting and Kurt Angle. The match wasn’t horrible or anything it was was absolutely nothing to get excited or interested about at all. If nothing else, Doc has a good look to him with the size and bald head.

Post match here’s Bully for the save and he loads up a table. D-Von runs as soon as he sees it so Sting comes back to beat up Doc. More members come in with a hammer to save Doc and Sting gets put through the table. Angle gets knocked to the floor and Doc “hits” Sting with the hammer, clearly missing his hand by a good space. Joe, Chavo and Hernandez make the save. You know, because you should be afraid when you have the high ground AND A HAMMER. Sting gets taken out by medics.

This has nothing to do with what just happened, but apparently that Ancient Evil Awakes is a Halo 4 ad. Silly me for thinking an ad during a wrestling show was about wrestling.

Time for Gut Check, because that transition is fine. Taz says yes without a doubt and Prichard says yes as well, giving York the contract. I can’t argue with that one.

Aries is in the back on the phone when he sees Brooke and Ray arguing over something. They see him coming and stop immediately because they don’t want him to hear. We’ve got intrigue!

We recap Hardy vs. Aries.

We run down the Turning Point card. Unless I’m missing it, does Ray not have a match?

Hogan is on the phone asking for updates on Sting when he runs into Joey Ryan. Ryan says Hulk can congratulate him on winning the X Title which he hasn’t gotten a shot at yet. Hogan tells Morgan that Matt isn’t allowed at ringside on Sunday. Morgan says Hulk has no idea who he’s messing with but he’ll find out. I still want Morgan as the Aces and 8’s boss. Morgan and Ryan leave and Hogan says he does know.

Samoa Joe/Chavo Guerrero Jr./Hernandez vs. Christopher Daniels/Kazarian/Magnus

It’s a big brawl to start with Chavo vs. Daniels finally getting things going. Daniels gets beaten around like a pinball before Chavo suplexes him down for two. Daiels hits a knee and tags Kaz but the beating continues very quickly. SuperMex comes in with a splash for two and it’s time for Magnus vs. Joe. The British guy who used to be a gladiator for some reason runs to the floor and upon reentry, the heels gets in a shot to Joe’s back to take over.

Everything breaks down again until it’s Joe hammering away on Daniels in the corner. Daniels drops a knee and brings in Chavo with a slingshot hilo for two. Hernandez hooks a bearhug into an overhead belly to belly before it’s back to Chavo who gets two off a dropkick. Some double teaming FINALLY slows Chavo down and the beatdown begins. A running jumping swinging neckbreaker gets two for Kaz and it’s off to Magnus again.

Daniels acts like he’s riding a horse for some reason before it’s off to Kaz for a bow and arrow hold. Chavo fights up and hooks a headscissors to take Kaz down and make the tag off to Hernandez. House is cleaned and Daniels gets launched with a shoulder block. The Border Toss is broken up but Daniels/Kaz’s double suplex is countered into a suplex on both of them by Hernandez. Off to Joe vs. Magnus with the Samoan taking over. Magnus charges into the Rock Bottom out of the corner.

The two of them head to the floor as does Daniels, so here’s a big dive by Hernandez to take them out. Chavo loads up the Frog Splash on Magnus but Kaz breaks it up. Joe loads up the MuscleBuster on Magnus but Daniels makes the save. There’s the Clutch on Daniels but it’s broken up by a jawbreaker. Daniels and Kaz go High/Low on Joe and a top rope elbow from Magnus gets the pin at 11:00.

Rating: B-. Solid six man tag here with the exactly right ending. This gives you a reason to believe Magnus can in fact win the title from Joe which wasn’t really something that was easy to buy into earlier. That’s basic booking and that’s all you need to do most of the time, yet most companies don’t get it.

Roode says his plan is coming together with AJ fighting Storm.

We recap the attack on Sting.

Here’s Aries to return the belt. There’s a ladder at ringside and another one in the ring. Aries says that Hardy says he’s the best wrestler on the planet. Well Aries is the best wrestler in the universe. Either this universe, or any universe. They’re going hard with the WWE jabs lately. Austin talks about how Hardy has lived and died by the ladder match. Hardy has fallen a lot, but on Sunday the fall is going to be worse than any he’s ever had. The fans keep chanting WHAT so Aries goes off on them a bit.

Aries says he’s going to use Hardy’s belt as a belt buckle, meaning Hardy’s face will be down by his crotch (his words, not mine). If Hardy wants this belt back, come and get it. Here’s Hardy who knocks Aries to the floor and takes the title before climbing up the ladder. He hangs both belts and poses but Aries shoves him off the ladder and stomps him down to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. Good show overall here and pretty good hype for the PPV, but again, we’ve got a lawyer fighting a career enforcer and Kurt Angle vs. D-Von which we’re supposed to pay for. They need to reveal someone big soon or the interest they’ve got left in this story is going to die soon. That’s a problem because it’s ALL OVER the TV shows. The other stuff with the world title related matches is really good though and I’m looking forward to the show. Still though, where is Bully Ray?

Results

Bobby Roode b. AJ Styles – Pin after knocking Styles off the top rope

ODB b. Tara/Jesse Godderz – Spear to Tara

Sting/Kurt Angle b. D-Von/Doc via DQ when D-Von hit Angle with a baseball bat

Magnus/Kazarian/Christopher Daniels b. Samoa Joe/Chavo Guerrero Jr./Hernandez – Top Rope Elbow To Joe

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Impact Wrestling
Date: October 25, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Jeremy Borash, Todd Kenely, Mike Tenay, Taz

It’s Championship Night or whatever the latest gimmick show these guys have going on is called. I’m not a big fan of having I think three title matches less than two weeks after BFG, but since the shows themselves aren’t worth watching, they need a gimmick to draw in fans. There’s a world title match tonight with an opponent for Hardy to be announced. Let’s get to it.

We open with Hogan and Hardy in the back. Hogan is picking Hardy’s first challenger tonight and Hardy is ready for anyone. Hardy leaves and we get a really stupid voiceover from Hardy, talking about all of his potential opponents. He doesn’t care who he faces here.

X-Division Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Zema Ion

We’ve got split announcers tonight, with Kenely (not sure who he is) and JB doing the first hour and the usual boys doing the second. Ion tries a quick rollup for two but it’s a standoff. Rob gets a gorilla press of all thigns and a pair of moonsaults for two. Ion heads to the floor and Rob is sent into the barricade when he follows. Ion charges into a kick in the ring but Rob misses a dive to the floor. Zema hits a flip dive over the top to take the champ out. Back in and Ion misses a majorly flippy dive so Rob kicks him in the face and hits Rolling Thunder for no cover. The Five Star retains the title at 4:33.

Rating: C-. Van Dam is a good pick for the title because you’re going to get at least a watchable match out of him and a win over him will mean something. Thankfully this should get him past Ion who was champion because….I’m not sure why he was champion, but it might be because he’s still around when everyone else from the X-Division revival

As Van Dam celebrates, Matt Morgan takes his head off with the Carbon Footprint. Joey Ryan has the X Title and poses with it. Morgan says this is what Hogan wanted.

Austin Aries is listening to the people trying to get the title match. The options are Angle, Anderson, Storm and Ray. Aries gets a shot anyway so he doesn’t care. We get some good jabs at Hogan’s “acting” and Aries says he’s going to use these guys for his personal amusement once they’re eliminated.

Here are Daniels and Kaz who don’t like the lack of tricks they’ve been getting for all the tricks they’ve been through. Daniels was left alone last week because Hogan screwed with Kaz’s travel. Kaz thinks the new champions are here in this country illegally. Daniels takes the mic from him and says that it’s not really Championship Thursday is it Suburban Commando? It’s a crime that everyone else is getting a shot but not them.

Daniels accuses Dixie of pandering to a Latino audience and says they should wear sombreros and drink tequila. Maybe they should call themselves Dos Stereotipicos. Daniels has a petition to get another title match. Well that’s better than the auto rematch clause. Cue the champions who say they’ll help with the petition. Hernandez has his title wrapped a chain around his neck. The brawl is on and the champs clear the ring in about a second. I think we have a rematch made. Kaz: “GIVE ME THAT CLIPBOARD BACK! THAT’S AN EXPENSIVE PEN!”

Hogan eliminates Anderson for nothing having enough fire. Aries tries to interview him. “Was it not taking enough vitamins? Not saying enough BROTHERS?” Aries says Anderson would be an easy opponent than him and throws a drink in Anderson’s face. The fight is on and Aries is down off a WICKED PAPER POSTER SHOT TO THE HEAD! A match is made and Anderson laughs. Then, to further the stupidity, we hear the director yell CUT. I mean…..really?

D-Von is with Aces and 8’s. The President has said no masks can come off. There are some women here to entertain them apparently, but first they have to take someone out. A member throws a dart at a bunch of pictures of wrestlers but we don’t see who it hit.

TV Title: Robbie T vs. Samoa Joe

Geez enough with the Robs getting title shots! Joe pounds away in the corner to start but T comes back with a spin kick to take him down. Joe puts on the Clutch and after a meaningless Robbie E distraction, Joe puts the hold on again while jumping on T’s back. Terry falls back on him but in an AWESOME moment, Joe sits up and with an INSANE look on his face, puts the hold back on and gets the tap at 2:28. Look up that ending. It looked great.

We recap Tara taking the title from Tessmacher along with Jesse from Big Brother. Did I mention I can’t stand reality TV?

Back to Hogan’s office and Ray apparently isn’t focused enough. He’s going to find D-Von and take care of him, basically eliminating himself.

Anderson yells at a guy in a headset and apparently it’s Anderson vs. Aries next. I know this because the announcer said it’s Anderson vs. Aries next.

Mr. Anderson vs. Austin Aries

They start immediately and Anderson yells mean things at Austin. Anderson takes his shirt off as Aries chills on the floor. A fireman’s carry goes nowhere and things slow down. Aries puts brass knuckles in Anderson’s tights but the referee takes them away. That was kind of odd. The fans chant cheater and Anderson pounds him into the corner again. Anderson gets sent to the floor and there’s the suicide dive as we take a break.

Back with Aries still in control but the fans are cheering for the cheater now. Anderson tries to fight back with some elbows and a clothesline that spins Aries inside out. Anderson’s spinning neckbreaker takes Aries down but the Regal Roll is countered again. The double rotation kick sends Aries to the floor and Anderson adds a plancha.

The fireman’s carry is loaded up again but Aries takes out the referee. Aries steals the knuckles from Aries and Anderson gets them. The referee takes them away and Aries knocks him cold with another pair. Aries pulls Anderson on top of him to feign a pin attempt before putting on the Last Chancery for the pin at 11:49.

Rating: C-. This was an awkward match, likely because Anderson is so unorthodox in the ring. Not a horrible match but it was missing by a half beat. Aries is doing some cool stuff and I like him way better as a heel. I like Anderson way better off my TV, but I guess he’s better in this role than another, but it’s not like it’s a great improvement.

Brooke and Tara/Jesse do their usual stuff. Brooke tells Jesse that ODB has an eye on him. Isn’t ODB married?

Tenay and Taz take over in what is supposed to be a big deal I think. We recap the show up to this point.

Knockouts Title: Miss Tessmacher vs. Tara

Tara is defending and gets jumped before she can get in the ring. After more of a beating, a Jesse distraction lets Tara take over with some cheap shots. Tara slams Tessmacher’s face into the mat a few times but stops for a kiss. From Jesse unfortunately. More kissing occurs and Tara misses her slingshot somersault legdrop. Tessmacher comes back and hits her Stinkface before hitting an X Factor out of the corner. Tara grabs Terrell and Jesse lowbridges Tessmacher. Widow’s Peak retains the title at 3:57.

Rating: D+. Annoying non-celebrity aside, Tessmacher contines to do nothing at all for me. She’s just there and is exactly the same character she was a year ago. Also she’s just not that good in the ring, period. Her looks are great but mix up the outfits a bit already. Tara continues to be annoying with Jesse so it’s a success on that front. Hopefully this feud is done now.

Post match more making out occurs until Brooke comes out to shake her head. Apparently ODB is calling out Jesse next week on Open Fight Night.

Joseph Park goes in to talk to Hogan about fighting Aces and 8’s. Hogan says Park has had one match (he’s had two) and also he’s worried about Park’s liability. Park has a piece of paper. Hogan: “What’s that?” Park: “It’s a piece of paper.” He goes on to say it’s a letter of indemnification which means if he gets hurt fighting Aces and 8’s, it’s no one’s fault but Park’s and there’s no legal responsibility for anyone else.

Here’s Ray who again thanks Sting for letting him be his partner. Not much shocks Ray anymore, but the D-Von reveal did. Ray wants an explanation from D-Von but gets the whole group instead. They get in the ring and D-Von says they’re not friends or a team or anything anymore. D-Von says this has nothing to do with Ray anymore and it’s all about Hogan. Apparently this is because Hogan said that he wanted D-Von re-signed to the company, but Hogan and Dixie never called. In other words, if you don’t follow TNA online and follow Hogan on Twitter, this whole story makes VERY little sense.

D-Von says it’s over but Ray says it’s over when he says it’s over. Ray says D-Von is lying and he talks about the Guns coming back from 3D like two years ago and how they should have retired as champions. Years ago D-Von said they’re rich so screw the fans. D-Von says yeah he said it, so Ray wants to fight one on one right now. D-Von says it’s on his time but Ray says he’ll call him out next week on Open Fight Night.

Ryan says he wants the X Title and Morgan says Hogan started this.

It’s also Gut Check next week. The wrestler is Christian York. He wrestled on the first TNA show and in ECW.

Hogan says he’s got something big planned for Storm in the future but tonight Angle has the title shot.

TNA World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Jeff Hardy

Jeff has two belts here: the vanity belt around his waist and the real one over his shoulder. We get some big match intros and we’re ready to go. Jeff takes him down with an armbar followed by the slingshot dropkick in the corner. Jeff goes to the corner but gets shoved out to the floor as we take a break. Back with Hardy escaping a chinlock and they clothesline each other.

Hardy starts speeding things up and kicks Angle to the floor. There’s a big clothesline off the apron and back inside for Whisper in the Wind for two. Angle comes back with Rolling Germans for two. The Slam is countered into the Twisting Stunner for no cover. Hardy goes up for the Swanton but Angle throws him off the top for two. Angle busts out a powerbomb for two and puts on a quick ankle lock, but Jeff kicks him off. The same kick puts Angle down but the Swanton misses.

The Angle Slam gets two so Jeff hits two straight Twists and the Swanton for just two. Jeff charges at Kurt and gets backdropped to the floor. Angle is spitting up blood. There go the straps as Hardy is thrown back in. Another Slam is countered into a rollup for the pin at 14:29 to keep the belt on Hardy.

Rating: B. When you need a solid match, call Kurt Angle. He’s great in spots like this where you need a main event and have no one else to throw in there. His resume is good enough to buy as a challenger no matter what he’s been doing lately. Either way, good stuff here and a very solid TV main event.

Post match Aries jumps Hardy and says the rematch is at Turning Point. Aries is so confident he’ll win that he takes the belt with him. The original, not the stupid one.

We cut to the back to see Angle getting destroyed by Aces and 8’s to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. I liked the show, but man alive was it exhausting. There’s WAY too much stuff going on here between all of the title matches and the backstage stuff and the reality show stuff with Hogan and it’s all just too much. TNA is the opposite of WWE in that respect as while WWE has too much time on their hands, TNA doesn’t have enough and you get shows like this where there’s so much stuff going on that you can’t get a chance to breathe.

Still though, this was WAY better than last week and I feel better about where they’re going now. One more note: slow down on the gimmick shows. We’re going from Championship Thursday to Open Fight Night next week. Space them out or cut one. Back to back is too much, and there’s likely another gimmick that I can’t think of.

Results

Rob Van Dam b. Zema Ion – Five Star Frog Splash

Samoa Joe b. Robbie T – Koquina Clutch

Austin Aries b. Mr. Anderson – Last Chancery

Tara b. Miss Tessmacher – Widow’s Peak

Jeff Hardy b. Kurt Angle – Swanton Bomb

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Monday Night Raw
Date: August 26, 2002
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the night after Summerslam and for once a lot has happened. Lesnar is the new world champion and Rock is gone until about February. On top of that, Shawn beat HHH but HHH destroyed Shawn post match, likely ending his career. Naturally that’s not what happened but at this point that’s the working theory. Also tonight we have a big change at the end of the show which set up things to be like that are in modern times. Let’s get to it.

Here’s Bischoff to open the show. He talks about how historic the show is going to be tonight, talking about things like the Hardcore title being unified with the IC Title and the presentation of a lifetime achievement award to someone. But first, here’s the new world champion Brock Lesnar, along with Heyman of course. Heyman is very proud to be in MSG but says that Lesnar is a bigger deal than Sammartino, Graham and Hogan combined. He told us this would happen, but none of us would listen to him.

Heyman lists off all the things he said would happen and says maybe now the fans will listen to him. Brock gets the mic and says that he’s only 25 and he’s already world champion. He says no one can beat him….and here’s Shawn Michaels? Oh wait it’s HHH screwing with us. Ok HHH doing the Shawn dance is funny stuff. HHH insists Shawn is gone forever and will never get in the ring again.

Remembering that Brock is still in the ring, HHH says that he wore down Rock last week for Lesnar, and now HHH wants the title shot that he himself said Lesnar should give him. Brock takes the belt off and HHH asks if Brock is man enough to play the game. Well we know he’s man enough to have a boring match with HHH that main evented Summerslam in 2012 but we’ll get to that later.

Cue Undertaker to get in on this shindig before the boring begins. Taker says he should get the first shot at Lesnar, who doesn’t object at all. HHH jumps Taker and it’s a two on one beatdown for a few seconds before HHH stares at Lesnar some more. Taker jumps them both and knocks HHH to the floor before slapping Lesnar and kicking him out as well. HHH gets back in but bails a few seconds later. Lesnar looked like a total afterthought here.

Eric makes HHH vs. Taker for the main event for the first shot at Lesnar.

Booker T vs. Christian

This is one of those “tag teams are feuding so here’s a member of each in a singles match” deals. Booker takes Christian down to start but the Ax kick misses. The reverse DDT gets two for Christian and the Canadian takes over. We hit the chinlock and there’s the USA chant. Booker comes back with some elbows and a spin kick for no cover. The spinning sunset flip out of the corner gets two but Christian rolls him up for two with his feet on the ropes. Another elbow puts Christian down and Goldust takes out an interfering Storm. Unprettier is countered into the ax kick for the pin for Booker.

Rating: D+. Nothing much here as it was already known that Booker and Goldust were the more entertaining team, but for some reason the title change didn’t happen last night. This was your usual Raw match where not a lot was changed, which would be the case for these guys for awhile. The titles would change hands two more times before Booker and Goldie got them, which caused the crowd to not care when it happened.

We get a video from some political event from earlier in the day.

Christian yells at Storm in the back when Test shows up. He’s got something planned involving an American flag.

Bubba Ray Dudley/Spike Dudley vs. Christopher Nowitski/William Regal

Molly is with Regal and Chris for some reason. Actually we get a video of HORRIBLE acting of Chris asking Molly to come to the ring with him. Apparently Chris wants to get lucky. His words, not mine. Bubba and Chris start things off with Bubba pounding away in the corner. Off to Spike with a top rope double stomp, one of the moves that always makes me cringe. Regal and Molly crotch Spike on the post and it’s almost immediately the hot tag to Bubba who cleans house. Molly tries her Molly Go Round but winds up taking What’s Up instead. Spike throws in a table but before it’s used, the Bubba Bomb pins Regal.

Rating: D. Another nothing match here which appears to be a theme tonight. The new version of the Dudleys never worked at all and the original team would reunite at the Survivor Series, in this same building actually. Nowitski was all character and no substance, which is the same problem someone like Sandow has to overcome today. This is one of those matches where the best thing you can say it as least it was short.

Nowitski keeps Molly from going through a table so Regal goes through it instead via a Bubba powerbomb (since the Dudley Dog didn’t work).

Bischoff talks to a special guest that we can’t see. That’s up next.

Molly thanks Chris in the back and gives him a hug.

The special guest is Jimmy Snuka who is here to receive a lifetime achievement award. We get a highlight video from his career which is pretty cool stuff. Eric presents him with the award but keeps cutting Jimmy off. Bischoff says the magic words: 3 minutes. Snuka’s eyes bug out in a funny visual but here are Jamal and Rosey for the big beatdown on Jimmy.

While Jimmy is being taken out of the ring, here’s Jericho to put him in the Walls of Jericho. Jericho runs his mouth about how he should be receiving the award. Jericho compares Snuka to Ric Flair who he made tap last night. Flair was in the ropes so it didn’t count but why let that get in the way of a good story? Since Flair interrupted the concert last week, Jericho is going to sing New York New York right here acapella. It’s a little modified but what are you going to do? We take a break and come back with Jericho STILL singing. He’s finally interrupted and we get this.

Chris Jericho vs. Jeff Hardy

Jericho takes him down to start with a suplex but Jeff pounds away in the corner to take over. The Canadian misses a dropkick and gets catapulted out to the floor. Jeff hits a HUGE dive to take Jericho out before running the barricade, only to charge right into a powerslam. Back in and Jericho hits a backbreaker before choking Jeff with his hanky. Jericho puts on a bow and arrow to stay on the back, making sure to tell the referee to ASK HIM.

Jericho stays on the back as Jeff isn’t selling as well as he usually does. He’s just kind of laying there instead. Jericho hits a backsplash for two and an uppercut puts Hardy down again. Jeff’s comeback lasts for about two punches before Jericho hits a sleeper drop to take him down for two. Chris goes up for something off the ropes but jumps into a dropkick before we can figure out what it is.

The Whisper in the Wind puts Jericho down and Jeff starts using his standard stuff. Hardy’s sunset flip is almost countered into the Walls but Hardy escapes into a small package for two. The Lionsault hits knees and it’s the Swanton for two as Jericho grabs the rope. Hardy tries a standing rana on Jericho for no apparent reason and there’s the obvious counter into the Walls. Jeff gets the rope but Jericho won’t let go of the hold, drawing a DQ.

Rating: C-. It was clear at this point that Jeff needed to take a break as he was doing nothing but signature stuff and had no fire in him at all. Thankfully that’s what he did soon into the new year, leaving the company for like four years. Jericho was trying here but he had nothing to work with across the ring.

Flair doesn’t make the save.

Heyman and Lesnar don’t care who Brock faces at the PPV.

Test is going to burn an American flag later tonight.

Apparently that’s right now as here are the Un-Americans to burn an American flag. They load up the blowtorch, Kane’s pyro and music hits, Kane doesn’t come out, so Goldust and Booker make the save. They get beaten down, Lawler gets up to save it but now Kane comes out. Gee that first time was pretty stupid wasn’t it? Kane is noticeably slimmer here as he would be for a few more years. JR says that’s an American chokeslam, even though it’s a Spaniard chokeslamming a Canadian. Kane also has the half mask now, meaning he can say he’s going to properly do a Spinarooni, which he actually does. Ok then.

Hardcore Title/Intercontinental Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Tommy Dreamer

This is a unification match in the series of “let’s get all the titles together so HHH can be CHAMPION OF EVERYTHING” title unifications. This will be under Hardcore rules and is allegedly the final hardcore match ever on Raw. JR says these two have wrestled in “other promotions.” You guys OWN THE COMPANY. I think you can say the name. They take it to the mat to start with neither being able to hit anything. It’s a standoff and the fans chant for ECW.

Van Dam hits some running shoulders to the ribs in the corner and a Russian legsweep gets two. We head to the floor with Dreamer pulling out a ladder. Van Dam superkicks it into Dreamer for two and sets the ladder up like a bridge between the ring and the barricade. Dreamer tries to bulldog Rob off the apron onto the ladder but Van Dam shoves him face first into the ladder. FREAKING OW MAN!!!

Rob puts Dreamer on the barricade and jumps off the ladder to kick him in the face. Van Dam picks up a chair and heads back into the ring to crush Dreamer with the chair for two. The split legged moonsault hits chair but Dreamer’s DDT onto it is countered into a northern lights suplex for two. There’s the DDT but not onto the chair which gets two as well.

The ladder is brought back in and a side slam onto the ladder has Van Dam in trouble. Dreamer’s middle rope elbow hits only ladder and the Rolling Thunder onto the ladder onto Dreamer gets two. Dreamer gets crotched on the ladder, kicked with a chair and Frog Splashed for the pin.

Rating: C+. Entertaining enough but did anyone believe that Van Dam wasn’t winning this? That’s ok I guess but it would have been nice if this had been Jericho or someone like that. As for this, the match didn’t work all that well but it wasn’t terrible I guess. Van Dam would lose the title to I think Jericho soon after this.

Here’s Stacy to say she’s going to keep Trish from interfering in the next match. Howard Finkel says, and I quote, “Right now you’re interfering with something in my trousers.” My childhood is scarred forever.

Lillian Garcia vs. Howard Finkel

This is part of some Fink is a chauvinist deal and it’s a tuxedo vs. evening gown match. The winner is permanent ring announcer for Raw. Howard says she looks good but he thought hookers were banned from this city a long time ago. This goes as well as you would expect. Howard says blondes like her should be on their backs. Stacy and Trish come in and strip Howard down to give Lillian the win.

Some guy named Criss Angel is going to live underwater for 24 hours. Ok then.

HHH vs. Undertaker

The winner gets the shot at Lesnar. Naturally it starts as a big brawl on the floor with HHH taking over. We head inside for the bell and a countered Pedigree. Taker pounds away in the corner and hits the jumping clothesline for two. HHH kicks him in the face and gets glared at. Old School hits for two and Taker pounds away and hits the Snake Eyes but the high knee blocks the big boot. Out to the floor and Taker’s knees go into the steps.

HHH pounds away on Taker’s head against the barricade as this is clearly not going to last long. The Game pounds away even more and it’s off to a sleeper because that’s what HHH wanted to make a big move. This thing goes on FOREVER until Taker suplexes him down. They slug it out with Taker getting the advantage again. The referee gets squished because that’s EXACTLY what this match needed. A big boot puts HHH down and there’s the chokeslam, but here’s Lesnar for a distraction. HHH hits Taker low but the Pedigree is countered. Lesnar knocks out Taker with the belt and HHH steals the pin for the title show.

Rating: F. It went eight and a half minutes and it was so boring I could barely stand it. A minute of this was spent in a sleeper and the rest was either punches or signature stuff. When you have Undertaker and HHH in there, anything worse than a watchable match is a failure. It’s amazing how much better these guys got over the years.

Stephanie is in the back and Eric tries to throw her out, but she’s here to say that Lesnar is exclusively on Smackdown, setting up the need for two world titles. Oh and that last match means NOTHING.

Overall Rating: D. And so it begins. Next week HHH would be handed the title that Sheamus currently holds because the world wants more HHH more than anything else. The problem with that is HHH in 2002 and 2003 was pretty awful, barely being able to pull out a good match if his life depended on it. Anyway, this was a pretty dull show with Lesnar being treated like nothing and the whole show being about HHH. Bad show, making last night an anomaly for the year.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Bound For Glory 2012
Date: October 14, 2012
Location: Grand Canyon University Arena, Phoenix, Arizona
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz

It’s the biggest show of the year for TNA and honestly I’m not all that excited about it. The main event tonight is Aries vs. Hardy for the title, but the REAL main event is Aces and 8’s vs. Sting/Bully Ray. The question is much more about who is going to be the leader of the gang, or if that’s even going to be revealed. I’d look for a fun quality show tonight but nothing that jumps off the page. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about what you would expect: it talks about the history of the company and how big the show is. Most of this has been shown on Impact in the Memories Are Waiting promos.

There’s a ramp to get to the ring which is always cool.

X-Division Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Zema Ion

Ion is defending. Rob came out on Impact when Ion was running his mouth and Van Dam said Hogan said he could have any match he wanted at this show. Zema has been injuring a lot of people lately. Rob takes over to start and knocks Ion to the floor but Ion moves before Rob can dive. Back in and Ion takes out Rob’s leg followed by a corkscrew kick out of the corner for two.

The champ goes up again and gets crotched, followed by a kick to take him down again. Out of nowhere Ion hits a jumping tornado DDT for two and then two more. Rob goes up but gets shoved into the barricade like he’s had done to him a few dozen times over the years. Ion hits a flip dive to keep Van Dam down while also barely avoiding breaking a rib on the barricade.

Back in and a missile dropkick gets two for Ion. As usual with Ion, his in ring stuff isn’t bad but the promos and persona getting there don’t do him much good. Off to an abdominal stretch which is pretty quickly broken. Van Dam makes a very fast comeback, takes Ion down, hits Rolling Thunder and the Five Star and wins the title at 8:00.

Rating: C. I can’t complain about Van Dam winning the title at all as this gives the title some credibility that it hasn’t had in a new champion in awhile. Also this gives the fans something to pop for early on which is the right idea. The match itself was nothing you wouldn’t see on Impact, but the right ending helps.

Magnuis says it’s his time to shine and therefore take the title.

TV Title: Samoa Joe vs. Magnus

They used to be partners and then split. Feeling out process to start with Joe taking him into the corner for the enziguri to take over. The champ pounds away and Magnus has to hide for mercy. Magnus comes back with punches of his own as we have a strike heavy match so far. A big old clothesline takes Joe down and Magnus takes over for the first time so far. Magnus takes him down with a knee and stomps away, followed by a jumping elbow for two. This is pretty decent stuff so far.

Joe fires back with some right hands but charges into something like a Michinoku Driver (sitout slam) for two. Magnus runs into an atomic drop and Joe starts speeding things up, firing up the fans in the process. They’re in Phoenix so you wouldn’t think that would be too hard. The backsplash and snap powerslam get two for Joe. Joe gets all crafty now and counters a leapfrog into a powerbomb to kill Magnus.

In a sequence that is always cool, Joe hooks an STF but once Magnus is getting too close to the ropes, he shifts it into Rings of Saturn. After Magnus gets a foot on the ropes, Joe loads up the MuscleBuster but Magnus goes to the eyes. A kick to the face takes Joe down and Magnus hits a top rope elbow for two and Joe is all fired up. He throws on the choke but Magnus escapes by climbing the corner. A jawbreaker escapes the hold again and Magnus goes for the knee. You don’t try holds on Joe though, and the choke retains the title for Joe at 8:57.

Rating: C+. They’re going with the fast matches tonight and that’s probably a good idea with these less interesting matches. This was a better match than the first one but when you have two talented guys in there instead of one, you’re often going to have a better match. There was no reason for Joe to lose the title yet anyway so no complaints there.

Roode says it ends tonight with Storm.

Video on Roode vs. Storm. Last year Roode lost in the main event of BFG, then Storm won the world title the next week on Impact. Roode used a beer bottle to beat Storm for the title and turn heel, which led to Storm wanting both revenge and the title back. Roode lucked out at Lockdown and then cost Storm the BFG Series, leading to a street fight tonight.

James Storm vs. Bobby Roode

MMA fighter King Mo is guest outside referee for no apparent reason. Storm takes over to start and hits a fast backdrop. We head to the floor with Storm in control. He hits Roode in the back with a chair but Roode sends him into the barricade to counter. Storm leg sweeps him into the barricade as well and Roode is in trouble early. Bobby comes back and sends Storm into the post, busting him open. Well at least they’re not waiting on bringing the violence here.

We get the weapons thrown into the ring and the fans want tables, because what would a street fight be without tables? Oh man Storm’s cut is a gusher. Roode puts a chair between the top and middle ropes, allowing James to come back with some kendo stick shots to the ribs. Storm hits a trashcan into Bobby’s balls using a kendo stick like a golf club to make Roode vibrate on the mat.

They head to the ramp with Storm hitting a DDT on the I guess wood. Storm jabs Roode in the ribs with a fan’s crutch and DESTROYS him with a trashcan. Mo hasn’t been a factor yet. Roode snaps off a spinebuster onto the ramp out of nowhere to give himself a breather. Storm grabs a fan’s beer for a quick refreshment. They head to the announce table and Roode kind of spears Storm through the other table to take over. There is blood EVERYWHERE. That gets two back in the ring and Roode yells at Hebner, which gets him in trouble with Mo.

The distraction lets Storm hit the Codebreaker and Last Call….for two. I’m glad that was only two as it would have been a pretty weak ending. Another superkick is caught and Storm is sent face first into the chair Roode set up in the corner a long time ago. That gets two so Roode puts Storm on the top rope. He gets a chair for a hard shot to the head and busts out the bag of thumbtacks. See, now that it’s been awhile since we’ve done this, it means something again. Roode tries a superplex onto the tacks but gets shoved down into them in a painful looking spot.

Storm drops a top rope elbow for two but Roode hits him low to stop Storm’s comeback. Roode goes to the floor and gets a beer bottle which is what started this whole thing. Storm hits Bobby low, takes a drink of the beer, and cracks the bottle over Roode’s head. Storm stands him up, and with Roode out on his feet, a second Last Call sends Roode into the tacks for the pin at 17:27. King Mo was barely a factor here and didn’t need to be around at all.

Rating: B+. In short, the cage match was better. That’s all this boils down to: the match at Lockdown was one of the best built up matches I can remember in a long time but they extended the feud because that’s what seemed like the right idea. Now don’t get me wrong: this was a great brawl and a good bloodbath and it had the perfect ending to the feud, but the feud didn’t need to be here, or at least not with Storm losing the second match. This is like Rock beating Austin at Wrestlemania 19 with nothing on the line. It’s a very good match, but it doesn’t mean as much.

Joey Ryan talks about says he should be on the roster already. He and Snow are polar opposites and tonight, they’re on the west coast where he has the advantage. He’s bringing sleazy back tonight.

We recap Ryan vs. Snow. Ryan was on Gut Check and got a big percentage of the votes, but the judges said no. Ryan terrorized Gut Check, becoming the only interesting thing about the segment for months, and tonight he faces Snow for a contract.

Al Snow vs. Joey Ryan

Ryan hides in the corner to start and the fans want Head. Snow is in workout clothes instead of wrestling gear. Snow gets down on all fours and lets Ryan get in a free chance to start. That goes about as well as you would expect for Ryan and he hides in the corner again. This is a good choice for putting on after the big street fight that just happened. It’s a way for the fans to calm down a bit.

Ryan keeps trying basic offense and Snow stops him at every turn. A delayed slam puts Joey down and Snow takes him to the mat with a headlock. Ryan gets in a shot to the ribs and a suplex for two. Snow comes back with the trapping headbutts and grabs Joey’s chest hair. Snow takes him down again for two and the fans want Head. And that’s what they get from under the ring. Ryan shoves the referee down and steals the Head for a makeout scene. Snow ties Joey up in the ring skirt….and here’s Matt Morgaon to Carbon Footprint Snow into next week. Ryan gets the easy pin at 8:28.

Rating: D+. This was about what you would expect from Al Snow in 2012. The Morgan twist was fine and a pairing between him and Ryan could be interesting, as if nothing else Ryan could use a bodyguard. This was the ending they had to go with and there’s nothing wrong with that, especially with faces being undefeated in the first hour.

Ryan and Morgan shake hands.

Kaz and Daniels don’t care about Twitter questions and brag about how awesome they are. These two feel totally greasy and evil and they’re GREAT at it.

We recap the tag title match. Basically both challenging teams should be able to maul the champions but they can’t quite get there. AJ and Angle keep arguing and Hernandez and Chavo don’t have the experience yet.

Tag Titles: Kazarian/Christopher Daniels vs. Hernandez/Chavo Guerrero Jr vs. AJ Styles/Kurt Angle

Angle and AJ come out separately. Wes Brisco is in the front row and I’d bet we’ll see him later. Daniels and Kaz are in orange and black to start jokes from Taz. Chavo and AJ start things off and in a strange visual, Angle and Hernandez are standing on the same side of the apron. Daniels and Kaz are chilling on the floor. This starts with the usual technical goodness you would expect from these two.

Off to Angle who stomps Chavo down in the corner and Chavo has some tape on his shoulder. Angle slams Chavo down on said shoulder and Daniels blind tags Kurt to come in and….scratch that as Angle stays in. Off to AJ vs. Hernandez with the big guy throwing AJ around and getting two off a splash. Kaz tags himself in to stomp on AJ but there’s the drop down/kick and it’s back to Kurt.

Chavo comes in to face Kaz and some good basic wrestling takes Kazarian down. Hernandez drops Kaz with a backbreaker and it’s back to Chavo to dropkick the freshly tagged in Daniels. AJ comes back in because we can’t have a PPV without Daniels vs. AJ right? A clothesline puts AJ down and it’s time for some pelvic thrusting. The champs hit a double team move with Daniels hiptossing Kaz into AJ for two.

Kaz puts on a full nelson of all things on Styles but a quick Pele takes Kaz right back down. There’s the hot tag to Kurt who beats up everyone in sight. He snaps off some suplexes and counters a sunset flip into an ankle lock on Daniels. There go the straps but Angle misses a charge in the corner and hits the post. Angle shrugs that off and suplexes Kaz onto Daniels for two.

Kaz comes back in with the slingshot DDT on Angle but Hernandez comes back in and takes out Kaz. Daniels smacks AJ in the face and there’s no one in the ring. Daniels dives onto Angle from the apron and there’s the REAL big dive from Hernandez to take everyone out. Kaz tries a rana off the top to Hernandez off the apron but Hernandez goes the wrong way and Kaz basically crashes on his shoulder in a SICK looking landing.

AJ gets the attention off Kazarian by hitting a BIG dive on the champs and Hernandez. Kaz is at least sitting up now. Chavo suplexes Angle over the top and back in as he rolls some suplexes. Angle Slam out of nowhere puts Chavo down and a double suplex takes SuperMex down as well. Kaz is back in with a clothesline to take Daniels down and the BME gets a VERY close two on AJ.

Chavo sends Kaz to the floor and hits another big dive to take him out. Angel’s Wings are broken up by Styles and the moonsault into the reverse DDT takes Daniels down. Hernandez actually tags in and hits a slingshot shoulder block followed by the Border Toss. Chavo hits a Frog Splash to give Hernandez (the legal man) the pin on Daniels and the titles.

Rating: B. This was a good match from these six as you would expect, but it didn’t really get close to the other matches that the teams have had before. That has to be expected though and this was certainly entertaining. All the dives were great, but man alive someone is going to get hurt badly from one of them one day. Daniels and Kaz losing makes sense as they’ve done almost all they can with the belts at this point.

Chavo says that was for the fans and for Eddie.

We recap Tessmacher vs. Tara. Tara is the teacher, Tessmacher is the student, Tara snapped, you fill in the rest. Oh and Tara has some Hollywood boyfriend who is likely some reality TV schmuck.

Knockouts Title: Miss Tessmacher vs. Tara

Tess is defending. Tessmacher’s robe/jacket is on the ropes as we start. A quick crucifix gets no count for the champ. Teryn Terrell is referee again because…because…I have no idea why she’s still around actually. Tara gets sent to the floor and we get a chase scene. Tara hides behind the referee and we head right back to the floor where Tess gets dropped on the apron to give Tara the advantage.

Back in and the champ gets one on a sunset flip and it’s off to a chinlock by Tara. Tara whips her into the corner but charges into a boot followed by a DDT from Tessmacher to put both girls down. Tessmacher takes Tara down and nips right back up, followed by a top rope rana (decent one too) but Tara blocks the Tesshocker. Widow’s Peak and Tara gets the completely clean pin at 6:18.

Rating: D. The rana looked good and the girls looked good in their outfits, but thank goodness Tara won here. Tessmacher is just worthless as champion and hasn’t changed a bit since she won the belt the first time. Tara has had the belt before but at least she’s better than Tess, but most people would be.

Tara introduces the boyfriend: Jesse Godderz from Big Brother. To the shock of no one, there is zero reaction. He’s been training in OVW for like a year and has won five tag titles there. Tara and Jesse make out in the ring. Crowd: “WHO ARE YOU?”

We get a video from the Hall of Fame ceremony last night. Lex Luger inducted him, which is way better than Christian. Hogan dressed up in a t-shirt while everyone else was in suits. Sting talked about owning a gym in California and having Hulk Hogan working out there.

Aces and 8’s vs. Sting/Ray is No DQ.

We recap said tag match. Aces and 8’s is a motorcycle gang who has been terrorizing TNA for about four months now and tonight, there’s a match between Sting/Ray vs. two members of the team. If the masked men win, they get full access to the Impact Zone. If they lose, the whole group leaves forever. The whole mystery here is about who their leader is, but in theory we’re going to find out tonight. Anderson was going to be the partner of Sting but Aces and 8’s beat him up, resulting in Ray getting the spot instead.

Aces and 8’s vs. Sting/Bully Ray

Sting and Ray both have facepaint. Aces and 8’s have theme music now. They bring out Joseph Park who looks a bit near death. There are two members here, one in a plaid t-shirt and another in a black one. We’ll call plaid shirt #1 and black shirt #2. This is No DQ and a brawl starts on the floor. Sting fights #1 and Ray has some issues with #2. #2 seems to be the taller of the two.

Sting gets sent into the announce table as the fans chant for Bully. Sting and Ray double team #1 and the fans want tables. The Stinger Splash hits the barricade as it has all but one time that I can ever remember. #2 and Sting start in the ring with Sting in trouble. Off to #1 who hits a clothesline for two. Park is chained to the barricade at ringside. #2 hits another clothesline for another two on Sting.

A bit boot gets another two and Ray is starting to play cheerleader. Sting makes a fast comeback and tries the Scorpion but #1 breaks it up. A suplex is countered by Sting into the Death Drop but Sting doesn’t cover for some reason. Double tag brings in #2 and Ray with Ray cleaning house. A middle rope shoulder takes #2 down and the fans are way behind Ray. Ray double clotheslines them down and a splash gets two on #1.

#1 brings in a chair but Ray hits a big boot to stop the shot. A third Aces and 8’s guy, pretty clearly Wes Brisco, comes in and hits Ray low. Park gets spat on and breaks the chain off the barricade. He comes in and destroys the third guy before beating him up the ramp. The match breaks down and #2 gets caught in a Doomsday Device. Double splashes crush #2 in the corner again and it’s Table Time with Sting playing Bubba’s role. Ray gets the table but #1 pulls Sting to the floor. Another member of Aces and 8’s comes in and spinebusts Ray through the table to give #2 the pin at 10:51.

Rating: C. Not much of a match here but the point is that Aces and 8’s won. How this makes anything any different is beyond me but this story hasn’t made much sense in the entire time it’s been running. Hopefully we’ll get some more to this tonight because if this is it, then it’s going to feel flat. The match was pretty much fine.

The rest of the group comes in and beats down Sting/Ray until Hogan comes in for the save and marches through them all until only the guy that jumped Ray is left. Hogan cleans house and Sting is back up. They go for the mask….and it’s D-Von. Yes, D-VON. Fans: “This is awkward!”

Aries says Hardy needs to win this to complete his comeback. Tonight, Aries is coming in angry and that’s not good for Jeff.

We recap the world title match. Aries is jealous of Hardy, Hardy wants the title to complete his redemption.

TNA World Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Austin Aries

The fans are pretty much split which isn’t what they were hoping for I don’t think. We start with a long feeling out process and we have roughly half an hour for this. They head to the mat and Hardy actually keeps up with the champ (Aries is defending if I didn’t mention that) until they head to the corner for the slingshot dropkick. Aries comes back and puts Hardy on the apron for a slingshot ax handle. He takes a victory lap and then one in reverse.

Back in and Hardy gets two off a suplex. They’re still in first gear here and that’s fine. Jeff knocks Aries to the floor and mocks Aries. The fans don’t seem pleased with Jeff so he jumps off the apron with an ax handle of his own. Jeff charges at Aries but Hardy crashes into the barricade and hits Aries at the same time. Back in and Aries gets two off a top rope splash. Aries charges into a boot in the corner and the crowd is probably 80% pro Aries.

A backbreaker gets two for the champ and it’s off to an abdominal stretch on the mat. Aries takes him down again and hits a corkscrew plancha for two. Hardy blocks the Last Chancery and hits something Big Show used to call the Alley Oop. He sets for a powerbomb but throws Aries backwards instead of forwards. Show’s was a bit slower but it’s the same move. Hardy makes his comeback and hits the low dropkick for two.

Whisper in the Wind gets two and the fans have quieted down a bit. Twist of Fate is countered and Aries is knocked to the floor. Hardy misses a slingshot and there’s the suicide dive to drive Jeff into the barricade. Another dive takes Hardy out again with this one getting two in the ring. Aries is busted but nowhere near what Storm was earlier. There’s the Last Chancery but Jeff escapes quickly.

They head to the ramp and Jeff can’t hit the Twist, but rather gets clotheslined into the ropes. Aries drops him on his head, sending the back of Jeff’s head into the edge of the ramp. And people wonder why he’s a drug addict. A missile dropkick sends Jeff into the corner but he comes out with the Twist for two. Jeff loads up the Swanton but gets crotched and super ranaed down from a double standing position. That looked awesome. Corner dropkick sets up the Brainbuster for two and Aries is STUNNED. Aries puts Jeff on top but gets knocked off and the Swanton gives Jeff the title at 23:04.

Rating: B+. This was a good main event but after the Aces and 8’s stuff, this came off a bit flat. Also, TNA REALLY needs to mix up their main event styles. The kicking out of finishers and then the pin soon thereafter can only take you so far and they’ve done it for years now. Watch a few TNA PPV main events and the formulas are almost always the same. Hardy winning is the right choice but it doesn’t feel like a huge moment at all for the most part. Still though, a quite good match.

Hardy celebrates to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. Was this a great show? No. Was it their best show of the year? No. Was it good enough to be their biggest show of the year? Not really. What it was however was a quite enjoyable show, other than the big surprise which my jaw is still having issues closing over. The ending was the right call as Hardy had to win the title to send the fans home happy. There are a lot of ways they can go now, but unfortunately Impact is going to be ALL about D-Von and that pretty much freaking sucks.

I can’t get over that and if they thought the angle was going nowhere already, they’re in for a big surprise now. I don’t think he’s the leader, but man alive this is BOUND FOR GLORY, not Impact. It’s a good show overall though and it sets up a bunch of stuff for the future, but man alive I don’t know who went with D-Von as the surprise. Even as a regular member, which is what he likely is, who thought that was a good idea for BFG?

Results

Rob Van Dam b. Zema Ion – Frog Splash

Samoa Joe b. Magnus – Koquina Clutch

James Storm b. Bobby Roode – Last Call

Joey Ryan b. Al Snow – Pin after a Carbon Footprint from Matt Morgan

Hernandez/Chavo Guerrero Jr. b. AJ Styles/Kurt Angle and Christopher Daniels/Kazarian – Hernandez pinned Daniels after a Frog Splash from Guerrero

Tara b. Miss Tessmacher – Widow’s Peak

Aces and 8’s b. Sting/Bully Ray – Ray was pinned after a spinebuster through a table

Jeff Hardy b. Austin Aries – Swanton Bomb

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

It’s that time of year again as TNA has their Wrestlemania tomorrow night.  Let’s get to it.We’ll start with the big matches.

Aces and 8’s going over Sting and Ray is pretty obvious.  What is not obvious is how this is going to happen.  The smart money is on Bubba turning on Sting and being a member of the gang, and I think that’s what they’re going to go with.  I’ve heard talk of Ray not turning being the swerve, which would be pretty creative, but I don’t think they’d go with it.

As for the leader, assuming he’s revealed tomorrow, my money would be on Jarrett.  I’ll talk about this more later on.

For the second biggest match on the show, I’ll take Hardy to win and send the fans home happy.  They have to give the winner of the BFG Series the title because if they don’t, the Series starts to look pointless as the winner would be 0-2 at BFG.  Hardy has been good since the debacle of Victory Road 18 months ago, so hopefully he can be good again.  Also it would set up Ray as the challenger for the title down the road, which I can’t believe I’m saying, but he deserves.

I think Chavo and Hernandez get the belts here.  I can’t picture Daniels and Kaz keeping them, but they can cry shenanigans and stay together which is good for everyone.  I don’t see AJ and Angle geting them, which will likely lead to another feud between them.  That leaves Chavo and SuperMex to pick up the belts in the meantime.  I’m not wild on that but I won’t hate it either.  It’s not like the division exists anymore.

Storm has to go over Roode.  He has to.  Storm was looking like the biggest star on the planet back in April (Ok that’s not true but he was the hottest thing in TNA) and they stopped it dead at Lockdown.  Then he loses the BFG Series and both were because of Roode.  This is the blowoff to the feud, but I wish it wasn’t happening.  Storm should have gotten the title at Lockdown and then go from there, because I think Storm would have been better on top than Aries.  Maybe not, but I would have liked to see it.  King Mo can go fall in a hole.  He adds nothing but a distraction to this match and isn’t needed here.

Now on to the stuff that fills in the card.

Ryan over Snow.  No reason for anything else to happen at all.

Tara gets the title.  As for the identity of the boyfriend, the only name I’ve heard that makes sense is Jessie Godderz.  Who is that you ask?  He’s from Big Brother, which is all you need to do to be a celebrity in this world anymore.  He signed with TNA last year and has been in OVW since then.  Godderz is mainly a tag team guy and not a great one at that, but he’s been on mainstream TV before so he’s clearly better suited here than a guy who is talented in the ring right?

Joe keeps the title, even though Magnus had a good promo Thursday.

Give me Ion to keep the title, because I want to see how far he can bring the title down with him.

Overall, this show doesn’t feel nearly as big as 2010 and not as big as last year’s either.  Aces and 8’s has bogged the company way down over the last few months and the world title comes off as a complete afterthought.  They’re running the risk of Wrestlemania 18, which si basically what happened last year also.  The problem with this show is that it doesn’t feel big at all.  It feels like a somewhat big show with a big match on it, and I don’t mean the world title.  The other problem with the tag match is that it feels like another point in the story, not a big conclusion or anything like that.

This brings me back to the leader reveal, which we’re assuming is happening tomorrow.  The problem that I see happening with this is there has been about a dozen people suggested as the leader.  We’ve heard Hogan, Brooke (good lord help us all), Sting, Abyss, Ray, Bischoff, Garrett (give us Brooke please), Jarrett, John Morrison (why?  Good guy to bring in but not in this role), Matt Morgan and others that I’m likely forgetting.  The problem is EVERYONE who could be the leader, barring a big surprise, has been suggested and it’ll likely be someone we’ve heard of.  If it is, that doesn’t mean it’s a bad thing, but that’s how people will perceive it, which is bad.  Just because something was guessed doesn’t mean it’s bad.

Overall, it should be a fun show but I’m not expecting to be blown away.

Predictions/thoughts?

Impact Wrestling
Date: October 11, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz

It’s the final show before BFG and I can’t say I’m chomping at the bit to see the show on Sunday. Bound For Glory is mainly focused on Sting/Ray vs. Aces and 8’s, whoever they are. The world title match is mixed in there somewhere but it’s way beneath the tag match as far as importance. As for tonight, I wouldn’t expect a lot of matches as the focus will likely be on building up what’s already there through a lot of promos. Hopefully there’s less King Mo tonight too. Let’s get to it.

After the recaps, we’re told that it’s Storm vs. Aries and Roode vs. Hardy. Those should be good.

James Storm vs. Austin Aries

We don’t have to wait long to see if they’re good I guess. Non-title here of course. Feeling out process to start and Storm armdrags Aries to the floor. Back in and Storm pounds away before he skins the cat. Aries tries to slide beneath the Cowboy as he pulls himself back in, but Storm dives at the champ. Aries slides back in and hits the suicide dive to take over in a sweet sequence.

After a quick chinlock from the champ, they chop it out in the corner. A dropkick from the middle rope to the back of a seated Storm gets two. James is all fired up now and he pounds away in the corner. Another ten punches hit Aries in the other corner but he comes back with five punches of his own. Storm shoves him off but the Eye of the Storm is escaped and Storm gets guillotined on the top rope.

The champ misses a missile dropkick but the Codebreaker is escaped. Brainbuster doesn’t work for Aries and they roll through an O’Connor Roll. Aries flips him over and they hit head to head. Roode runs out and posts Storm which I’m not sure Aries saw. The brainbuster finishes Storm at 7:20.

Rating: B. This was a fast paced opener and it worked really well. Storm has grown up so much in the last year it’s unreal. I really hope they haven’t screwed him up to the point where he can’t get near the world title again. This match could set up a post BFG feud if Aries retains, but if Hardy wins then it’s Bully Ray getting the first feud I’d assume. Still though, very good opener.

Wes Brisco asks Angle if he can go to Phoenix. Angle says ok and that can’t end well. AJ comes in and says Angle needs to get his head in the game and leaves.

Sting’s 4^th or so BFG Moment is the Hogan face turn from last year.

Here are Sting and Hogan to the arena. Hogan and Sting don’t like having to play by Aces and 8’s rules and Hulk says it feels like they made a deal with the devil. This brings out Daniels and Kaz, saying that they’re the angels that can fix this problem. Hogan made the wrong move by picking Ray, because instead of Sting/Ray, it should be the two of them fighting Aces and 8’s.

Kaz: “Listen Thunderlips…” Ok Kaz is awesome. Kaz tries to get out of the title match and suggests that Angle is put in Ray’s place in the tag match. Here’s Ray who says Angle is a great choice for a wrestling match, but this is going to be a fight. Ray says he doesn’t have to be Sting’s friend because he has a unified goal in getting rid of Aces and 8’s. Hogan isn’t convinced and makes the tag champs vs. Ray/Sting. The champs PANIC.

Hernandez vs. AJ Styles

AJ takes him down to start and escapes a choke hold with a Pele. Styles keeps yelling at Chavo instead of following it up, which allows SuperMex to avoid a charge in the corner. Off to a bearhug for a few moments before AJ escapes and speeds things up. The drop down/kick sets up another dropkick to send Hernandez to the floor. Styles yells at Chavo AGAIN and Hernandez gets up again. Back in and Hernandez hits something like a Monty Brown Pounce for the pin at 3:53.

Rating: C. This wasn’t great but they were telling a good story with AJ being distracted by the numbers game but without Angle out there to even the numbers, AJ lost in an upset. They’ve built up the title match very well and I’m really not sure who is going to win, which is the right idea for a match. It should be awesome too.

Aces and 8’s feed Joseph Park and imply that tonight they’ll determine if they’ve been locked out or if everyone else is locked in.

Here’s Zema Ion who complains about not having a title match on Sunday because he’s injured everyone in the division. This brings out…..Rob Van Dam? He says Hogan has told him he can fight anybody he wants at BFG, and instead of picking Aries and Hardy in the world title match, he picks Ion. Rob kicks Zema to the floor and that’s the match setup.

Ray comes in and asks Sting if he’s ready but Hogan isn’t pleased. Ray asks why Hogan doesn’t trust him and they get in an argument. Sting snaps and says Ray can be trusted. If there is anyone you want to trust the instincts of, it’s Sting.

Brooke and Teryn are talking when Tara comes up with a list of stuff she has to do once she’s champion. Brooke rips it up and says no green room for the boyfriend on Sunday.

Christopher Daniels/Kazarian vs. Sting/Bully Ray

Ray and Daniels start with Ray hitting a BIG chop in the corner. Another one has Daniels screaming and Kaz gets scared off the apron. Sting takes over on both champions and it’s off to Ray vs. Kaz. Ray gets two off a belly to back suplex and it’s off to Sting. Off to Ray for another suplex as Sting and Ray are tagging very fast. Sting hits the first splash in the corner but Daniels pulls Kaz away from the second one.

Sting gets crotched on the post and sent into the barricade as the champions take over. Ray chases Daniels off with a chair and it’s off to Kaz for a chinlock on Sting. Back to Daniels who pounds away some more but they clothesline each other, allowing for the double tag to bring in Ray and Kaz.

Bully cleans house and everything breaks down. Daniels tries to hit Sting with a belt but Ray kicks him down. Sting saves Ray from a top rope double ax from Kaz and the unlikely partners shake hands. Sting says Bully Get The Tables. Great way to stop the D-Von chants there guys. Ray powerbombs Daniels throug a table for the DQ at 10:09.

Rating: C. So the tag team champions just got slaughtered by a makeshift team that is likely going to split up due to Ray being himself on Sunday. That’s TNA logic for you, and if a team going into the third biggest match on the card has to be sacrificed along the way so be it. At least it wasn’t a pin.

Video on Aries vs. Hardy with Aries still being jealous of Jeff.

We get a video recapping Aces and 8’s.

Video recapping Snow vs. Ryan.

Joe and Magnus get in an argument in the back about the match on Sunday. Magnus says he’s a businessman and Joe hides behind politics. As Magnus is leaving he says “Bound For Glory….or at least I am.” Good line.

Gail Kim vs. Miss Tessmacher

Non-title of course. Tessmacher takes over to start but Gail avoids the Stinkface. Gail takes over with a guillotine on the top rope and starts choking away before hitting a backbreaker for two. Tessmacher comes back with a slingshot and some shots in the corner followed by that sitout legsweep of hers. Tessmacher goes up and gets crotched before countering a fireman’s carry into a sloppy rollup. Gail counters a rana into a powerbomb for two and Tessmacher hits a bad looking release mat slam which I can’t remember the name of for the pin at 5:31.

Rating: D. This was another uninteresting and pretty sloppy Knockouts match. The move is called the Tesshocker apparently. Good to know. Tessmacher is doing nothing for me as champion as she’s the exact same person she was months ago and that’s not a good sign. Tara is someone that can help her but the whole division is just there anymore.

Tara comes out for a beatdown but Tessmacher beats her down and hits the Tesshocker.

Roode is talking in the back when Storm comes in and says he knows it was Roode that attacked him earlier. Storm chokes Roode and a fight starts before King Mo, the real star of the match Sunday, breaks it up and says save it for Sunday.

Sting’s Hall of Fame video.

We run down the BFG card.

Bobby Roode vs. Jeff Hardy

Roode jumps Hardy as Jeff is slapping hands at ringside. They head inside for the opening bell with Roode in full control. Hardy makes a brief comeback with his seated dropkick and they slug it out in the corner. A clothesline puts Roode on the floor and Hardy hits a big old plancha to take Roode out. Back in and Roode clotheslines him down and we head back to the floor. Hardy hits a suplex on the outside and we take a break.

Back with Roode holding Hardy in a front facelock and keeping control. Hardy fights up but gets put in a sleeper for his efforts. That gets two arm drops but Hardy finally breaks the hold. Hardy rams him into the buckle and hits Whisper in the Wind for no cover as he’s too far down. Hardy fires off right hands and hits a middle rope splash for two.

Roode comes back with a spinebuster for a near fall of his own and Jeff goes up, only to get caught in a superplex attempt. Hardy knocks him off but misses the Swanton. A spear puts Jeff down for two and the fisherman’s suplex is countered into a Twisting Stunner. Another Twist is loaded up but Roode this Hardy low for the DQ at 16:18.

Rating: C. Not bad here but it wasn’t ever going to hit an epic level given the ending they had to do. Hardy is likely going to win the title on Sunday but that doesn’t really make it a huge moment. The title match’s build is only so good at best and it doesn’t really make me care about it or the PPV as a whole. The match will be good but they’re approaching WM 18 area with the Aces and 8’s match as related to the world title. Gee and it’s Hogan again. Shocking.

Anyway post match Hardy runs Roode off and here’s Aries. Aries is tired of being told to the fans and it’s not true that he’s jealous of Hardy. He’s not jealous of the rap sheet Hardy has or of Hardy being so crippled he can barely play with his little girl. He’s tired of Hardy getting special treatment while he can’t even get the new music and the new entrance he wants. Aries says he does his best when it’s him against the world.

The only failure at BFG is Hardy because until Hardy beats Aries, he’s still a failure. Hardy is a lot taller than Aries. Jeff’s response: “Austin, my nuts hurt.” He says he’ll win on Sunday and Aries asks Jeff to leave so he can bask in the fans’ glory. Hardy goes to leave but Aries kicks him low and loads up the brainbuster which lays Hardy out. No Aces and 8’s tonight.

Overall Rating: C-. This didn’t do much for me, but the point of the show wasn’t to blow the doors off the place. The idea of this show was to set up the PPV and they did that for the most part. Adding RVD and the X Title to the card was a good idea as both should be on the biggest show of the year. This wasn’t a thrilling show but they have the PPV ready to go, although I’m not wild on where they’re going with it.

Results

Austin Aries b. James Storm – Brainbuster

Hernandez b. AJ Styles – Running Body Attack

Christopher Daniels/Kazarian b. Sting/Bully Ray via DQ when Ray powerbombed Daniels through a table

Miss Tessmacher b. Gail Kim – Tesshocker

Jeff Hardy b. Bobby Roode via DQ when Roode hit Hardy low

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Bound For Glory 2010
Date: October 10, 2010
Location: Ocean Center, Daytona Beach, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz

So here it is. This is the show that they have spent MONTHS building to. This is their Wrestlemania and by far their biggest show of the year. We get a new champion tonight and find out who THEY are. Even I’m excited and I’ve made no secret that I’m a big critic of this company. Tonight is the final match for Abyss apparently which I don’t buy at all. Let’s get to it.

Main event is no time limit, no count out and no DQ. That makes me nervous.

There’s and entrance ramp as well as three video screens. The production values are rather solid here, especially by TNA standards.

Tag Titles: Motor City Machine Guns vs. Generation Me

Good choice for an opener. Shelley and Max (does it matter?) start us off. Naturally it’s insanely fast paced to start us off. The Guns get all tricky and destroy Max in the corner. A big elbow Poetry in Motion move gets two on Max. The heels are getting dominated here for the most part as we hear a lot about Shelley’s neck.

Double DDT out of the corner to Shelly and he’s in big trouble. Shelley keeps fighting and manages to get out with a big double stomp off the top. Hot tag to Sabin as this isn’t bad at all so far. The Guns and everything else go completely insane and Sabin hits Punk’s springboard clothesline to Jeremy for a close two. Tenay is right that no one has tag wrestling like this.

The Guns are just straight up fun to watch. I’m not sold on making this the opener though as this is something that probably should have been used to fire up the crowd in case they get bored later on. Max gets two and is legit shocked that Sabin kicked out. They go for the DDT again but Shelley makes the save.

Elevated Sliced Bread is blocked and Jeremy takes out Sabin with a big dive. A Piledriver like move is broken up by Sabin at two. Very fast paced match naturally. This is too fast to call. We actually get a tag. Are you kidding me? They set for More Bang For Your Buck but a nice counter sets up a running German off the top by Sabin. Skull and Bones on Max ends this.

Rating: B. Very fast paced and fun match. Do I need to explain this one again? It’s an insanely fast paced tag match to open up a show. That’s PPV 101 but I worry that this might be the high point of the show. We get the awesome Motor City music twice though and the Guns keeping the belts is a good thing so I’m happy.

Tara and Madison go nuts on Christy about hair dye or something. Tara is grateful to Madison for life apparently.

We recap the Knockouts Title situation which I think you all know by now. It’s all about the Beautiful People and that’s about it. This again becomes all about them and nothing else. Keep in mind Mickie James is the referee here.

Knockouts Title: Angelina Love vs. Madison Rayne vs. Velvet Skye vs. Tara

Dang Mickie looks good. I could go without the hardcore country thing though. One fall to a finish here and tags are required. Angelina vs. Madison to start us off. Off to the regular Beautiful People now which is the only match left in that division I suppose. Madison comes in and gets in Mickie’s face but that goes nowhere.

This is another match that is going too fast to really keep track of. Tara vs. Velvet at the moment. How in the world did Hefner think Tara didn’t look good enough for Playboy? Octopus Hold from Velvet to Tara which blows my mind a million ways to Monday. The tagging thing is of course abandoned soon.

Widow’s Peak doesn’t go on as Angelina makes a save. And then she rolls up Velvet with some tights being pulled to give her the title. We get the BROKEN song so I’m very happy. Madison goes off on her and Mickie takes her out. So it’s Tara vs. Mickie now? Ok then.

Rating: D+. Pretty much just a mess here and only a way to get the title on the show. This wasn’t much at all but you had five hot women and you get to add Mickie to the division now which is definitely not a bad thing at all as it was dying for some fresh blood. Nothing very good here but I’ve seen worse.

Eric Young babbles about some code. Yeah I don’t care either.

We recap the “feud”. Yeah I don’t care either. Let’s get this over with.

Eric Young/Orlando Jordan vs. Ink Inc

Eric has the TNA rule book while Orlando is in a white suit with a beekeeper mask. And now Eric has fake tattoos or something. I give up. Jordan and Neal start us off because someone has to. Let the gay jokes begin.

Taz recommends that Shannon avoid the crotch of Orlando. I give up. Total meh match here as it was boring on Impact and it’s boring here. This is really just an outlet for Taz to make gay jokes about Orlando which aren’t incredibly funny. Eric gets crotched on the top rope.

Orlando vs. Shannon at the moment. Eric is fooling with the rule book because it’s been a few seconds without “comedy.” We talk about the German broadcast team for no apparent reason. Eric starts cheating by pretending to tag in and Taz is just like “screw it’. Eric tags himself in to fight Orlando. We get a Midnight Rocker reference which makes Taz laugh. Eric causes Orlando to get caught by Shannon for the pin.

Rating: D. Just move on please. I hate comedy matches, especially when they lack comedy.

Jeff says he’s going to win with the Twist of Fate and Swanton Bomb.

X–Division Title: Douglas Williams vs. Jay Lethal

This is the return match apparently from Impact a few weeks ago when Lethal won it in the first place. Non-British tights for Williams here. What would the Bulldog think? Fast paced start until Williams gets a hold on Lethal to take over. And so much for that. Tenay talks about the new tights because that’s interesting I guess?

Apparently his family crest is on it. No mention of Fourtune here which is kind of odd. Williams takes it to the mat and we stay there for awhile. Williams is getting back into the style of hating the X Division style that worked so well for him in the spring and early summer.

Lethal cranks up the speed to make things work a bit better. Taz likes suplexes and you can hear it in his voice. It changes when Williams uses a few of them. He even throws in some analysis of them for fun. Hey he sounds like an analyst. I thought this was 10/10 not 10/31.

Chaos Theory out of nowhere gets two. Dang I love that move. Williams gets all ticked off and takes him up top and sets for a rana. Lethal gets a SWEET counter where he rolls through it perfectly into a sunset flip for the pin to retain. He celebrates in the crowd which is always a nice touch.

Rating: C+. Nothing special here but the ending was rather good. This felt like a decent Impact match but it was totally tacked on here with no particular rhyme or reason. Blast I need to stop listening to Shinedown. This wasn’t bad but it was just kind of thrown on there to get the match on the card.

And while he’s in the crowd SHORE attacks him. Like the idiot that he is, he says he’s winning the title and taking it back to Jersey. You know, where Lethal is from.

We recap RVD vs. Abyss which is a bit early on the card I’d think for it. I can’t imagine this is where THEY are revealed. That’s just way too early for it I’d think but who knows? The idea here is RVD isn’t at 100% but he wants revenge no matter what.

Rob Van Dam vs. Abyss

Monster’s Ball here which means anything goes. And remember this is his last match EVER! He brings Janice and Bob, which are the names of Dixie Carter’s parents in what I’d assume is a rib, and puts them on the announce table. Abyss says RVD is done and THEY are coming. And remember this is once a century. You know, like EVERY OTHER DATE.

RVD of course kicks the heck out of him to start to a HUGE RVD chant. Van Dam is in a t-shirt here for some reason. There’s a barbed wire table at ringside. Total dominance so far by Van Dam who is on fire. He gets taken down by an elbow of all things. Given the shirt I’d bet on RVD going into barbed wire.

Chokeslam is countered and of course Abyss eats barbed wire. This would be more effective if we hadn’t seen it just three days ago with bigger stars. And of course he’s up again just a few seconds later, dodging a splash that send RVD into the wire. Abyss busts out a regular table as we talk about THEY.

Trash can to the head of Van Dam as Abyss tries to make a barbed wire platform between the railing and the ring. Oh never mind it’s just a regular table. Abyss winds up on it and RVD hits Rolling Thunder onto it. Cool spot. Too many dead spots here though as we hit a spot and then stop to look for more stuff to use in the next one.

RVD sets up Coast to Coast but gets shoved off and RVD winds up in barbed wire. Sick looking bump. The match more or less stops as the referee is thinking about stopping it. Instead we throw him back into the ring and Abyss gets…nothing. Ok then. Instead we get the Hogan ear taunt.

Van Dam comes back and sends him into the barbed wire board in the corner. Now it’s Abyss in trouble. RVD goes for the Five Star but Abyss moves and RVD has a tummy ache. And now It’s time for Janice. Well of course it is. RVD counters though and gets a pair of shots with Janice to the gut of Abyss and the Five Star. Abyss is bleeding from the mouth.

Rating: B-. Fun hardcore match with everyone beating the tar out of each other. Ok so maybe saying everyone for two people is a stretch but you get the concept. This worked fine for what it was with lots of weapons being used and all that jazz. They’re dragging this angle out for all it’s worth and more though so points for that….I think. Fun match.

Abyss says here WE come. Oh great.

We recap the handicap match with the whole Deception thing. This is the other major angle and Hogan is VERY hurt keep in mind. Yeah I don’t buy it either.

Jeff Jarrett/Samoa Joe vs. D’Angelo Dinero/Kevin Nash/Sting

Joe vs. Pope start us off. Oh and Joe is fighting for Hulk’s honor despite having zero connection to him. Nothing special so far and we hit the floor. It more or less has broken down with Jarrett fighting Pope and the old guys vs. Joe. And so much for that as we get back to Nash vs. Joe.

The entrance ramp really does look good. Pretty basic match so far. Joe gets beaten on for a good while but FINALLY gets a shot in on Nash to get away. He goes for the tag and there goes Jarrett for your swerve. Nash says I told you and Joe is in trouble. Now it really is 3-1. Jackknife to Joe ends it.

Rating: D+. Just the match that no one cared about to build to the swerve. Pay no attention to the fact that we’ve been building up Sting vs. Jeff for months and now it’s all cool. I’ll allow him an explanation but dude, this was supposed to be the explanation, not more questions. Whatever man.

Anderson says he’ll win.

Here’s 3D for their major announcement. Yep they’re retiring, but they want one more match, and of course they want the Guns. They’re retiring either way. Nice. This is solid I think and it’s good that they’ll retire this way.

We recap Fourtune vs. EV 2.0. If there is ANY justice in the world, EV loses here. Naturally it’s more about Flair vs. Foley than anyone else.

Fourtune says exactly what you would expect them to say. Regular vest for AJ thank goodness.

Fourtune vs. EV 2.0

This is a one ring WarGames match. A man from each team starts and after a set amount of time (5 minutes I think) there’s a coin toss and another guy comes in from the winning team. That goes on for two minutes then a guy from the losing team comes in. Two more minutes of that and then the winning team gets the advantage again. Alternate until all 8 are in and then we lower the roof, complete with weapons. No pins or submissions until everyone is in.

EV has Dreamer, Sabu, Rhyno, Richards and Raven. Yeah ten people in there great. Foley is with them. Flair brings out AJ, Storm, Roode, Kaz and Morgan. Fourtune has the advantage so screw the coin flip idea. Flair is in an undershirt. Oh dear.

The old guys go at it before the match starts and we try to figure out who starts the match. Kaz and Richards to start. Again Taz wants to say ECW and can’t do it. Kaz beats the tar out of him to start. And he continues doing so. Well that’s what you get for sending in Richards as your leadoff man.

Stevie gets a Downward Spiral into a modified Koji Clutch but AJ comes in seconds later to make it 2-1. Richards is of course in WAY over his head and gets destroyed. Figure four on Richards and he’s almost dead. Dreamer is in next. How in the world is this guy feuding with AJ Styles?

Dreamer spits mist or something at AJ as Richards gets back into it. All of Fourtune is in blue which is a cool idea I guess. Roode goes in third as this is going to take awhile to just get everyone in. Flair punches Dreamer through the camera hole. I love that thing as it gives you far better shots.

Sabu comes in and hooks a seated crossface chickenwing on AJ which we’ll call a camel clutch for fun I guess. This is REALLY slow now with EV controlling. Dreamer is bleeding fairly badly. Storm is in so it’ll be Morgan and Raven or Rhyno in last. Storm turns the tide and we get BEER MONEY!

With nothing left in the other minute here’s Raven who looks stupid with blonde hair. He cleans some house and shoves a snot rag in someone’s face. Ah ok it was Roode. Dreamer gets his crotch stepped on for fun. Dude seriously, Raven is your hot tag in essence? Roode is busted open.

Sabu is busted too. Morgan comes in as the final member of Fourtune. He drills Richards and drills Sabu back first into the cage. Dreamer takes the elbows in the corner as the advantage does the same thing it’s done the whole time so far. Raven is bleeding too so every member of EV who is in the match is busted.

Big Gore to Storm and here comes the roof. This is where the advantage is supposed to come for EV I guess. Flair and Foley get into it of course as is their custom. EV takes over and there are bigger weapons on top of the cage such as a table, a ladder and something else that I can’t make out.

Raven and Morgan beat the heck out of each other as EV is mostly in control. Morgan goes for the Carbon Footprint and misses, hitting the door which doesn’t move at all. Kaz gets drilled into the door and there it goes. Richards and Kaz go up and we set up the ladder up there. This always scared the living heck out of me.

Sabu dives through the door to take out Morgan and maybe Storm. Richards sets up the table on top of the cage and Kaz goes up the ladder and here’s Kendrick on top of the cage too. Kaz goes through the table and Kendrick appears to be meditating or something. In the ring Dreamer drills AJ in the leg and drops him on a chair, winning the match. Yes, EV won the match and everything seems to be fine with it. WELL OF COURSE THEY ARE.

Rating: D+. Not much here as there were a lot of very slow spots. Also the Kendrick thing just did nothing for it. The weapons were ok but the ending felt kind of tacked on. This never got to the level that they wanted it to get to and that hurt it a lot. This was one of the weaker matches they’ve done with this gimmick and I think a lot of that is due to the participants.

Oh yeah. DID I MENTION EV 2.0 JUST FREAKING BEAT FOURTUNE and that TOMMY DREAMER PINNED AJ FREAKING STYLES??? And people wonder why this company can’t be taken seriously.

Music video about the main event.

TNA World Title: Mr. Anderson vs. Kurt Angle vs. Jeff Hardy

Hardy has new music. Nothing all that special as again you can barely understand it. He’s called challenger #1. Who exactly is he challenging if no one has the title? Anderson is in gray tights which is odd. It’s 10:33 and we’re just starting. Think they’re cutting this close? No big match intros either which is weird also.

Angle is knocked to the floor and Anderson gets a neckbreaker on Hardy for two. Angle pops in and goes for Anderson’s knee. Big old belly to belly as it’s all Angle here. Then Hardy saves and it’s all Hardy. Little theme going on there. Angle Germans Hardy who Germans Anderson to take both of them over in a cool spot.

It gets two on Hardy as we keep going. 10:37 and no sign of THEY which scares the daylights

out of me. Hardy sends Angle up and over and might be hurt. I don’t buy it but whatever. Hardy goes over the top in a dive to take out everyone. Back in and Angle is ok, hooking a chinlock on Hardy after a cover gets two.

Running German to Hardy and he’s up seconds later. Ok then. Hey we went a full two hours and 40 minutes before we got a shot of Dixie. Angle is busted open a bit. Angle busts out some Germans on Anderson as Hardy is down. Hardy gets some of the same. Ankle Lock on the face painted one.

Anderson tries to save and winds up in the ankle lock. Angle locks the ankle lock on BOTH of them at once. That looks awesome. Naturally it doesn’t work but it looked cool while it was on. Anderson gets that rolling fireman’s carry slam from the middle rope on Angle so that Hardy can cover both for two.

10:45 now as this has somehow been going 12 minutes. Angle Slam gets two on Hardy. Top rope Angle Slam on Anderson but Hardy gets the cover for two. The fans think this is awesome and it’s not bad. Twist of Fate to Anderson and the Swanton hits. Angle saves into the ankle lock and Hardy is in trouble.

Jeff kicks off and sends Angle into a Mic Check for a VERY close two. Pinfall reversal sequence gets a lot of two counts. Angle is the only one left and hits the moonsault on Hardy for two again as Anderson is still down. Angle and Anderson go at it and block each others’ finishers.

And there goes the referee. Oh dang it. Everyone is down and here comes Eric with a chair. And here it comes. This is what TNA has spent the last 4 months building to. And what a shock: HULK IS HERE! Or at least his music is here. Yep there he is but on crutches. He needs help getting into the ring which I don’t buy.

Hulk looks ticked at Eric who throws the chair out and wipes his hands. Hardy stumbles to his feet on the floor and gets in. Both Bischoff and Hogan have crutches and Hogan gives Jeff his. Angle is up. Hardy pops Angle with the crutch and Hogan points at Jeff. Yes, it appears that Jeff Hardy, the most popular star in the world, is part of They. Twist of Fate to Anderson, and Hardy is world champion.

Rating: B. Ending aside obviously, this was a solid main event. It felt like a big match, but then again I would prefer a singles match for the title. That’s the traditionalist in me talking but if there is a match to end the biggest show of the year, only on very special occasions (this isn’t one of them) should it not be one on one for the world title.

Here comes Jeff Jarrett and Abyss. The fans throw trash in for no apparent reason. Hogan and Abyss hug, and THEY are revealed. Yes, it was Hogan and Bischoff with Hardy all along. RVD comes down and yells at Jeff and is of course laid out. Massive posing ends the show.

OverallRating: B-. This one took me a very long time to reach as it’s now almost 330 Monday afternoon as I write this. This show, without a doubt, was not boring. The ending was a legit shock and I think lived up to most of the hype, but we’ll get to that later.

As for the rest of the card, there are two important things here. Number one, Lethal vs. Williams was the only standard one on one match. Number two, expect to see a lot less wrestling in the near future. Nothing was incredibly bad, but not a lot really stood out.

What I saw in this card was a great example of an old school WCW card: the opening stuff was great, then the stars come on and things go downhill a bit. For instance, Fourtune loses? Why? I understand the whole heels win at the end so faces have to win something, but dude, Tommy Dreamer beat AJ Styles at the biggest show of the year in 2010. The theory may work fine but when you put it into action that doesn’t mean it works.

And now for the big reason this show has perplexed me so: the main event. The match itself was rather good and considering my disdain for triple threats that’s saying a lot. As for the angle, the best thing I can say about it is that it was shocking. I didn’t see Hardy turning. Hogan and Bischoff I did and I have the LD posts to prove it.

The common issue with the turn is that it makes no sense. It does make sense to a degree but it’s one of those things that you have to suspend a lot of disbelief, think about a lot of things, ignore a lot of things and just accept parts of. That’s rarely good and I don’t think it’s good here.

The big comparison has been to Vince and Austin at Mania 17. Not really as in that it was simple as JR put it: “Steve Austin has sold his soul to the devil himself to win the WWF Title!” There. That’s it. That’s your explanation. There is no conspiracy, there is no hidden meaning, there is nothing but Austin saying he’s not good enough to beat Rock on his own and is taking the shortcut to get what he wants.

This is a huge conspiracy that is going to require a lot of explanation and in which something is going to get fouled up. I’ve said this many times: I don’t want to have to have a pencil and paper and a flow chart to understand an angle. TNA should not be more complicated than Lost.

Now after all that is said, the show was still good I thought. The ending was good. The shock was good. Impact is going to be through the roof for a few weeks. That being said, the real ratings are going to show through in a few weeks. They’ll be most interesting. I was VERY intrigued last night and while I think it came off as a letdown, the PPV has to be viewed as a success, despite Hogan managing to be the focus of the end of ANOTHER major show and angle.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Impact Wrestling
Date: October 4, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz

We’re closing in on Bound For Glory with this show and then one more next week before the biggest show of the year. Last week Hogan and Sting agreed to a tag team match against two Aces and 8’s guys at the PPV and it’ll be Sting and someone else, possibly RVD, to face the bikers. However, the deal is nothing else happens from Aces and 8’s until the PPV, so it’s not likely that’s what we’re going to be discussing tonight. Let’s get to it.

Normal recaps open things up.

Hogan and Sting are in Hogan’s office but Hogan can’t be with Sting at the PPV. Sting is going to watch every match tonight to determine who his partner is going to be at BFG.

Mr. Anderson vs. Gunner

Anderson says he wants to be Sting’s partner and to watch him do his thing here. Gunner immediately jumps Anderson to take over. Anderson knocks him to the floor but Gunner takes over back inside. A quick chinlock doesn’t really get Gunner anywhere so he whips Anderson into the corner only to miss a charge. Mic Check gets the pin at 2:28.

Post match Kid Kash comes in to beat on Anderson but gets Mic Checked as well.

Tara is on the phone with her boyfriend when Gail comes up. They have a tag match later and Tara insults Gail’s cable TV star husband, who is a TV chef I think.

Gail Kim/Tara vs. Miss Tessmacher/ODB

ODB and Gail start things off with the bigger chick throwing Gail into the corner. The beating continues with ODB in complete control. Off to Tess for a Stink Face because that’s what she’s good for. ODB comes back in and misses the Bronco Buster but saves herself before pain hits her crotch. Off to Tara who can’t get out of the way of the Bronco Buster but a Gail distraction allows the heels to take over.

Tara and Gail keep having issues as Tara wants to come in and get the glory after Gail does the work. Tara’s standing moonsault hits ODB’s knee and it’s off to Tessmacher to very little reaction. A headscissors takes Tara down as does a faceplant out of the corner. ODB gets a shot from the flask and spears Gail down but Gail comes back in and is shoved by Tara into Tessmacher. The Widow’s Peak pins Tessmacher at 4:44.

Rating: C. The Knockouts are a shell of what they used to be but there’s an angle here which is tried and true over time (teacher vs. student) and it’s hard to screw up. On top of that we have the mystery of Tara’s boyfriend which could wind up being something interesting. Either that or it’s Jason Hervey which would just be stupid.

Bruce Pritchard is showing Al Snow something on a contract and Snow says he’ll get it done.

We recap Al Snow vs. Joey Ryan over the months.

Here’s Snow and he brings out Joey Ryan with something to say to him. Snow says that several months ago he did something he shouldn’t have and put himself and TNA in a bad position. He offers an apology to Ryan but that’s not good enough for Joey, who wants it more personalized. Ryan says tonight he’s in control and wants to hear about the other legal agreement they’ve come to. Snow pulls out a contract for Ryan but Joey wants to sign it on Snow’s back. There’s a catch though: Ryan has a match with Snow for BFG and it’s win and get a full time contract.

Angle wants to pull a double at BFG but Sting will only think about it. Kaz and Daniels are seen in the back hoping that Sting says yes. Angle leaves but Ray steps in and says he should be in the world title match, but he’ll take a spot on Sting’s team instead. Sting says go be a bully and prove your worth.

TV Title: Samoa Joe vs. Rob Van Dam

Joe won the title last week and it’s his first defense. That’s a different belt than the one he held last week too. Joe takes him down to start but Van Dam comes back with a few forearms. Those get him nowhere as Joe clotheslines him down and hits an enziguri in the corner. Van Dam tries his rolling roll up but Joe catches the leg and puts on an STF. They head to the floor and Van Dam dropkicks the leg out before trying to drape the wide load over the barricade.

That fails due to the laws of gravity and RVD gets rammed into the steps for his efforts. Back inside and Van Dam hits a middle rope cross body to put Joe down but he goes up top WAY too fast. Joe pulls him off the top and the MuscleBuster is enough to retain the title at 4:27. I miss that move.

Rating: C+. This didn’t have any time to get going but it worked while it lasted. Joe being all dominant and tough again is a good thing as he’s one of the guys that is hard to screw up when he’s booked right. RVD continues to be kind of there in TNA. He doesn’t really do anything but he’s a big enough deal that he can be thrown into whatever story and fit. Match was short but it was decent while it lasted.

Everyone in the tag team triple threat but Angle gets in an argument about last week and Chavo losing the match because of interference.

Dixie talks about her BFG memories.

Aries talked to Hardy earlier today about their tag match last week where Hardy stole the pin after Aries did the work. Ray comes up and says he’s not going to punch either of them right now, but he’ll punch one of them later. It’s to prove himself to Sting by beating Hardy. Aries takes offense to this and wants to fight Ray instead. They argue so Hardy suggests a triple threat. Ray is cool with that.

Chavo Guerrero vs. Kurt Angle

No Kazarian? I would have thought it would be another triple threat like last week but this is a nice surprise. Feeling out process to start with Chavo hooking a headlock that can’t be broken by an Angle suplex. That’s quite the headlock. Angle takes him into the corner and stomps away but Chavo comes back with some uppercuts. Angle finally gets Chavo on the mat with a go behind grip and a kind of slam gets two.

Back up and Chavo dropkicks Kurt down and literally rolls onto him for two. A release belly to belly puts Chavo down but he escapes the Angle Slam and hits a quick rana for two. It’s time for Three Amigos but Angle blocks the third and rolls some Germans. The ankle lock is countered and there are the Three Amigos in full. The Frog Splash misses and there’s the Angle Slam. Hernandez looks at Angle and the distraction is enough for Chavo to roll up Kurt for the pin at 6:42.

Rating: B-. Another pretty good but short match here. I don’t know what the deal is with that unless Angle is still hurt and can’t go at full speed yet. His thigh is taped up so maybe there’s something not quite healed yet. They’ve done a good job with the three way feud and I’m digging the idea of the match at the PPV. Pretty good stuff here.

Hernandez and AJ get in for a staredown as the tag champs stand on the stage.

X-Division Title: Douglas Williams vs. Zema Ion

Williams starts out fast and clotheslines Ion to the floor. Ion is defending in case you had forgotten this title existed. Back in and Ion cranks on the arm with a hold and Williams taps almost immediately at 1:19.

Ion won’t let go and the decision is reversed. He says he’s on the top of Sting’s list but he wants off it, because his looks aren’t worth the risk.

We look at King Mo, an MMA guy who is coming to TNA and will be guest referee for Storm vs. Roode because that match needs a guest referee for some reason.

Pritchard and Brown are looking at a video of Matt Morgan running in at a house show and beating up a referee. Pritchard yells at Brown for letting this happen.

Here’s Storm to talk about the match with Roode a bit more. Ten days from now this war with Roode started and at BFG, it’s not about proving that Storm is a better fighter or a better wrestler. It’s about being a better man. Hogan doesn’t like the referees being pushed around so he’s brought in King Mo to be the guest referee. Cue Roode for the interruption.

Roode accuses Storm of riding his coattails and being jealous of Roode for years. Bobby promises that this isn’t just a match, but it’s going to be a fight. He’s not going to stop at BFG until he knows Storm’s career is over. It’s going to be a bloodbath and Roode doesn’t care about King Mo, because no one is going to stop him at the PPV. If Mo were here, Roode would say it to his face. Mo comes out in a glittery silver robe, MMA gloves, a big freaking medallion and a crown and shoves Roode down. Mo gets in the ring in Storm’s face and they share a beer.

Hogan has picked his guy and has it written down, because he can’t say it to Sting who is right next to him. Sting likes the idea but wants to see Bully first.

Aces and 8’s tortures Joseph Park a bit more. He’s been kidnapped for three weeks now. WHY HAS NO ONE CALLED THE COPS??? They tear Park’s shirt off and apparently are going to attack car battery clamps to his nipples. We’re going to find out who their two guys are tonight to face Sting and whoever it is.

Joe vs. Magnus at BFG. That was obvious and that’s the right call for sure.

Bully Ray vs. Jeff Hardy vs. Austin Aries

Non-title here. This is joined in progress after a break with Ray knocking down Hardy in the ring. Aries is on the floor I presume but he pops back in as Hardy is sent to the floor. Aries and Hardy start working together with some Poetry in Motion with Aries playing Matt. The legdrop between the legs and a low dropkick set up a Twisting Stunner to Ray and Jeff goes up. There’s the Swanton but Aries makes the save. Aries hooks the Last Chancery but Hardy makes the save this time.

Hardy is sent to the floor and Ray backdrops Aries onto Jeff in a good looking crash. Back in and Aries says he doesn’t need anyone, which is pretty solidly heel of him. He hits the running dropkick to Ray but Bully blocks the brainbuster. He goes to look for his chain but settles for the title belt instead. Hardy back in now and Ray sends Jeff into the champ. Bubba Bomb to Hardy gets the pin at 4:10 shown. Yeah less than five minutes.

Rating: C. This is the night of the short matches. Ray winning is one way they could have gone although I’m not sure it’s the right one. It’s also not the wrong move but they put themselves in an awkward place here. Ray winning is probably the best possible outcome they could have gone with, but this likely wasn’t the best match for them to pick.

Here are Hogan and Sting to announce Sting’s partner for the match. Hogan talks about how Aces and 8’s are running wild around here and now it’s getting personal. Really? Just NOW it’s getting personal? Hogan says he needs a real partner for Sting and it’s going to be….Anderson. Yes, apparently beating Gunner is more impressive than beating the world champion and the number 1 contender. And never mind as Anderson is beaten down by Aces and 8’s in the back.

Ray runs out and says it should be him now for sure. He gives a great speech about going to war (ruined by the fans chanting for D-Von) and sticks his hand out to Hogan. Sting likes the idea and Hogan waits before shaking his hands. The fans boo of course because nothing makes these people happy. Ray is ready to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This show was…..understandable. It certainly isn’t a good show but they built up the PPV. This is the funky period before a major PPV where the card is mostly set and now you’re filling in the stories before you get there. It happens every year before Wrestlemania and it happens every year before BFG. It’s not fun but it has to happen. Nothing on here was terrible, but nothing on it was great either. They’re not even trying to hide that Aces and 8’s is the real main event and I’m actually hoping it goes on last so we don’t get the same thing Roode and Angle got last year where no one cared. Slow, but not awful show.

Results

Mr. Anderson b. Gunner – Mic Check

Gail Kim/Tara b. ODB/Miss Tessmacher – Widow’s Peak to Tessmacher

Samoa Joe b. Rob Van Dam – MuscleBuster

Chavo Guerrero b. Kurt Angle – Rollup

Douglas Williams b. Zema Ion via DQ when Ion wouldn’t release his hold

Bully Ray b. Jeff Hardy and Austin Aries – Bully Bomb to Hardy

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Impact Wrestling
Date: September 27, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

It’s another pretty big show tonight in that we have Hogan going to Aces and 8’s clubhouse which hopefully means we can move to something of substance instead of teasing everything anymore. Other than that we’re going to have a new TV Champion tonight in the form of either Magnus, Samoa Joe, Mr. Anderson or Garrett freaking Bischoff. Let’s get to it.

We open with the usual recaps from last week.

Aries and Hardy are teaming up tonight against opponents to be named later.

Here’s Hogan to open the show. He talks about how tonight is a turning point for the company, but first and foremost he needs to address the TV Title. Tonight there are going to be four people trying to convince him that they deserve a shot at the title and there will be a new champion tonight. As for Storm and Roode, there’s going to be a street fight at Bound For Glory and there’s going to be a special enforcer in the form of King Mo, the MMA fighter who is coming to TNA for awhile and try to do both sports at once.

That brings us to Aces and 8’s. Tonight he’s going to their clubhouse and he explains the story so far in case you missed the opening five minutes ago. He’ll go alone if he has to, and this brings out Sting. Sting says he promised to have Hogan’s back and he’s backing that up tonight.

Anderson’s BFG moment is being in the main event of BFG 2012.

Kurt Angle vs. Chavo Guerrero vs. Christopher Daniels

BFG preview here. Daniels immediately heads to the floor and tells the other guys to fight it out. That goes about as well as you would expect a diabolical plan to work, with Chavo and Angle taking over on him very easily. Angle gets sent shoulder first into the post so it’s time for Daniels to fight Chavo on his own. The referee checks on Angle for a while and Kaz trips up Chavo, leading to a fight between the face teams on the floor. All six get in the ring for a staredown as we take a break.

During the break the three non-wrestlers got ejected and we come back with Angle caught in a top wristlock from Daniels. Chavo is nowhere to be seen. Angle snaps off a German to Daniels and one to a charging Chavo. The Angle Slam is countered by Guerrero and he knocks Angle to the floor. Chavo starts speeding things up on Daniels but Angle comes back in to suplex him down very quickly.

A big German takes Daniels down but Chavo rolls Kurt up to break up the ankle lock. Chavo loads up the Three Amigos on Angle but has to settle for them on Daniels instead. Chavo goes up but Angle puts the ankle lock on Daniels, who counters and sends Angle into Chavo, crotching him. An STO out of nowhere on Chavo is enough to get the pin for Daniels at 9:06.

Rating: C+. This was the usual fast paced match that you would expect from these three. Angle is great at running three way matches and this worked like the rest of his matches with two opponents do. Daniels winning is a good way to keep the chances up that the champions could retain at the PPV, which is something they’ve been missing lately. Good match.

Time for the first round of voting from Hogan regarding the TV Title. He asks the four of them why they should get the shot. Garrett says he’s worked since day one and D-Von saw something in him, which is why he should be here. Magnus and Joe get in an argument and Anderson says he’s action and not talk. Joe says none of them deserve to be in the ring with him. Based on resumes, that’s mostly true. Magnus talks about how great he’s been all around the world and how he knows how TV works, which is what a TV Champion should do. Hogan throws Magnus out to keep Magnus and Joe apart.

Brooke Hogan goes to see Tara and Tara takes a call from her boyfriend. Make that two. Apparently she has to earn a title shot. Brooke takes the phone and leaves with it. She still isn’t interesting.

Tara vs. ODB

Winner gets the shot at Tessmacher at the PPV. Eric does his stupid schtick before the match starts. ODB pounds away to start and chases Tara around the ring for a few seconds. Eric gets on the apron like a tag partner and gets down before he does anything of note. ODB hits a splash in the corner followed by a Bronco Buster. Tara is sent to the floor and gets in an argument with Eric, allowing ODB to hit a baseball slide to keep control.

ODB hits her fallaway slam and knocks Tara out to the floor where she’s holding her knee. Tara seems to hit on Eric, who insists to his wife (yeah they’re married. Remember that?) that his pants are still up. Tara takes her knee brace off but she’s goldbricking and pins ODB with a small package at 4:44.

Rating: D. I don’t remember a less interesting or less surprising match in years. Gee, ODB and Eric do goofy stuff, Tara wins to set up the obvious title match at the PPV, and the match was nothing of note. The Knockouts have falled through the floor as of late and they’re not going to get better anytime soon it doesn’t seem. At least they look good. Well, other than ODB that is.

Gut Check is next.

Time for Gut Check and Snow is in trouble due to the Joey Ryan stuff. Now the judges talk about Markopoulous or however you spell that.

Bully Ray is on his Twitter Machine and won’t talk about who his partner is tonight against Hardy/Aries.

Joe is in the title match and Hogan has to pick between Anderson and Garrett. Garrett says he can hang with Joe. Thankfully Anderson gets picked because it’s not Joe’s time. Garrett stares down Hogan with a look that says something more is coming from him. Just what the world needs.

Roode goes in to see Aries and implies he’s going to be Ray’s partner tonight. Roode can’t stand the idea of Aries being champion because he can’t get a title shot while Aries is still champion. He tries to get into Aries’ head about Hardy, presumably to mess him up at the PPV.

TV Title: Mr. Anderson vs. Samoa Joe

Both guys try for their finishers very fast but neither can get them to work. Joe hits his back elbow and enziguri in the corner for two and he takes over. He stomps away a bit and hits a chop to the back but gets rolled up for two. A swinging neckbreaker gets two for Anderson as well and he pounds away. Anderson hits a jawbreaker and a Regal Roll but Joe rolls it through into a crucifix for two.

The Mic Check is countered but Joe counters a rollup into most of the Clutch but he doesn’t have the bodyscissors. Now the scissors is on and Joe gets the back too. He traps Anderson’s arm before Anderson can make the rope. This hold has been on for like 90 seconds now and Anderson is still conscious. Anderson passes out to give Joe the title and the Grand Slam at 5:21.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t much of a match for the TV Title if they were going for something special. The ending was pretty absurd with Anderson holding on in a choke for two minutes. Wouldn’t the guy be dead after that? Anyway, the match was dull as it pretty much just came and went, which isn’t what you want in a title match.

That wasn’t the red TV Title. It looked like the world title that was around before Jeff won the title for the first time.

Hogan and Sting are talking when a chick shows up saying there are documents that have to be signed. Before they can, the chick maces them and Aces and 8’s pop up and put hoods on Hogan and Sting’s heads before throwing them into a van which pops up out of nowhere.

Gut Check time. Taz thinks Evan has a ton of potential and says yes. Bruce says he’s too young. We go to the kickout and he talks about Snow trying to get into ECW and SMW when he was under 18. Snow says Evan is the epitome of what this is about and that he has all of the things that he needs. But he’s 18 so it’s a no.

We get a preview of TMNT’s new series. As a TMNT fan, this scares me to death.

We get a clip from the clubhouse and the big boss is on his way. Hogan looks….scared?

Douglas Williams won a tag title at BFG one year in a ladder match.

Back at the clubhouse Hogan and Sting are at the card table with presumably the big boss sitting across from them. He says his identity doesn’t matter and he has a business off for Hulk. Hulk wants to fight right now. The boss wants to be allowed to come and go from the Impact Zone. Joseph Park is brought out on a table. The boss offers a tag match at BFG and Hogan immediately says himself and Sting.

Boss: “Hulk, for the first time in your adult life, THIS ISN’T ABOUT YOU.” The Boss says that at the PPV, if Aces and 8’s win, they get full access to the Impact Zone but if they lose, Aces and 8’s go away. It can’t be Hogan and Sting in the ring though. Parks (apparently he gained an s on his name somewhere) is held until after the match.

Storm is happy with having a street fight with Roode at BFG.

Bully Ray/Bobby Roode vs. Jeff Hardy/Austin Aries

Hardy and Ray start things off with Hardy immediately speeding things up to send Ray into the corner. Off to Aries vs. Roode with Bobby looking a bit nervous. Hardy comes in sans tag and cleans house while Hardy clears the ring. We take a break and come back with Hardy getting knocked off the top to give Ray and Roode the advantage.

Ray is in so the fans of course have to chant about D-Von because THEY CAN’T SHUT UP AND ENJOY THE FREAKING MATCH FOR FIVE MINUTES. Off to Roode and Hardy grabs a Twist of Fate out of nowhere to take Roode down. Aries and Ray get tags but Roode distracts the champ and Ray knocks him to the floor. Aries gets sent into the steps and it’s off to a bearhug from Ray back in the ring.

The champ bites his way out of it but won’t tag in Hardy and it’s Ray running wild. Hardy gets kicked in the face and Aries has to fight off both guys by himself. Jeff seems content to just look up into the ring and let this happen. Aries hits the suicide dive on Roode and a missile dropkick takes Ray down. Aries talks trash to Hardy but hits the Brainbuster on Roode anyway. Hardy tags himself in and hits the Swanton for the pin on Roode at 14:00.

Rating: C. Standard main event tag match here to further the idea that the champ wants respect and admiration that Hardy has. It doesn’t look like they’re going anywhere with the idea of Ray being added to make it a threeway but to be fair that never really was mentioned on TV. The match was fine for what it was.

Hogan and Sting are returned to the Impact Zone. Sting is untied and doesn’t do anything because of a threat to Park. Aces and 8’s leave in their van and apparently Sting is going to be one half of the tag match.

Overall Rating: C. This didn’t do it for me for the most part. This show was mainly about Aces and 8’s and that story isn’t getting my interest up at all. It’s been dragging on WAY too long and it looks like the boss is going to be revealed at the PPV, which makes sense. The problem with that though is that it looks like we’re heading for a faction war, which is TNA’s bread and butter. That doesn’t do anything at all for me though and it seems like it’s going to dominate the show.

As for the rest of the show, nothing really happened other than Joe winning the TV Title which means nothing for the most part. Just nothing going on here outside of Hogan, which really fill me with confidence for the next two weeks. The tag title match is going to be fun, but the world title match is on the back burner and that’s the last place it needs to be.

Results

Christopher Daniels b. Chavo Guerrero and Kurt Angle – STO to Guerrero

Tara b. ODB – Small Package

Samoa Joe b. Mr. Anderson – Koquina Clutch

Austin Aries/Jeff Hardy b. Bobby Roode/Bully Ray – Swanton Bomb to Ray

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Imapct Wrestling
Date: September 20, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz

It’s Open Fight Night again and based on the history that this concept has, not a lot is going to happen. We’re on the road to Bound For Glory and with four shows left, the main story is who is the mole in TNA that is helping Aces and 8’s. We might get some answers to that tonight as Joseph Park has promised to give us a major piece of evidence tonight in his investigation of the case. Let’s get to it.

After the usual intro, we open with Hulk and Shaquille O’Neal in the back. Shaq says he’s got Hulk’s back tonight. He’s leaving now but he’ll be back later.

We open with Angle and Styles in the ring. Angle talks about the history he and AJ have with the tag champs and how they earned a tag title shot last week. However, Hernandez and Chavo got one as well. Since it’s Open Fight Night, let’s see which contenders are better. Angle sounded like he was slurring his speech here a bit.

Hernandez/Chavo Guerrero vs. AJ Styles/Kurt Angle

AJ and Chavo get things going and they immediately take it to the mat with AJ getting only a tiny advantage before they get back to their feet. Off to Angle vs. SuperMex with Hernandez easily taking Angle into the corner. He slams Kurt down and it’s off to Chavo to speed things up. Chavo takes it to the mat for some reason and hooks a headlock. Angle easily suplexes him down to take over followed by a release overhead belly to belly. The tag champs are on the stage as we take a break.

Back with AJ holding Chavo in a chinlock on the mat. Apparently AJ hit the drop down/kick during the break to take over. Chavo fights up and brings in Hernandez again to start throwing around people like small villagers. Angle saves AJ from the Border Toss but Chavo takes out both his opponents with a single dropkick off the top. Chavo can’t suplex AJ so Styles kicks him in the face and brings in Angle for a bunch of suplexes. Hernandez breaks up the ankle lock on Chavo but AJ kicks Hernandez’s head off.

There’s the ankle lock on Chavo again but he kicks Angle off. AJ comes in with the springboard forearm but Hernandez comes in with a kind of over the shoulder slam. Angle Slam takes Hernandez out but Chavo hits Three Amigos on Angle. AJ breaks up the third but takes three suplexes from Chavo instead. Chavo loads up the Frog Splash but Angle breaks it up. Hernandez breaks up the breaking up and the Frog Splash misses AJ. Pele takes Chavo down but the tag champs run in for the DQ to break up the Styles Clash at 12:22.

Rating: B. That was the only possible ending to this match as well as the only one that makes sense. When it’s clear they’re heading towards a triple threat at BFG, the right move is to not have one of the challenging teams go over the other. Good stuff here and the triple threat is going to tear the roof off the place.

Hogan comes out (quoting Jay Z of all people) and makes the triple threat for the PPV.

Al Snow talks about the Gut Check guy tonight but doesn’t says he didn’t cross the line with Joey Ryan.

Hogan is on the phone with somebody who is apparently Joseph Park. Park is five cars back but will be here with the evidence tonight.

Samoa Joe talks about BFG 08 and diving out of the sky box onto Sting.

Evan Markopolis (screw trying to spell that one right) talks about wrestling since he was 13.

Dixie yells at Bruce Pritchard about Aces and 8’s being in the place they want to be. Al Snow comes in and Dixie changes the subject. Ok then.

Gut Check: Evan Markopolis vs. Douglas Williams

The fans are behind Evan even though he’s taken down almost immediately. Apparently there are going to be Gut Checks at live events. Sure why not. Williams controls with ease and makes Markopolis look like he has no idea what he’s doing. Evan tries a sunset flip but Williams knees him in the face. When all else fails, HIT HIM IN THE FACE! Evan hits a quick dropkick and crossbody but Williams doesn’t even let him get a one count. A delayed vertical suplex puts Evan down and Doug gets ticked off. He throws Evan down and puts on an arm trap headlock for the tap out at 4:04.

Rating: D. What is the point of these things anymore? They’re just squashes with guys who would be jobbers any other day of the week getting their name on TV and getting mauled by some former champion. What does this prove? These guys never get close to winning and they all have the same backstory, so why would I want to see it?

We recap the latest issues with Roode vs. Storm, these being from No Surrender.

Here’s Storm to the ring to call out Bobby Roode. Storm says this is going to be a fight instead of a match and he wants the coward to come out right now. Here’s Roode in a suit. Roode says that he’s overdressed for a fight tonight, but it doesn’t matter because Roode isn’t fighting. Storm is never going to be a world champion again and Roode walks away, saying Storm can fight somebody else.

Roode goes to the back and runs into Hogan. Hogan yells about Roode bailing and says that if Roode doesn’t go fight in three minutes, he’s sitting home for the rest of the year.

Post break (three minutes and forty three seconds later. Hulk Hogan is a liar) Storm calls Roode out again and Bobby comes out very slowly. Storm charges up the ramp and beats on Roode with a shoe. He also chokes with a shirt as there’s a referee here for some reason. They head up to the stage with Roode being rammed into the set. Storm jumps off the stage but Roode catches him with a punch to the ribs.

They head to the ring and we actually get a bell.

Bobby Roode vs. James Storm

Roode is almost immediately clotheslined to the floor but he comes back with a shot to the head. Storm sends him into the steps but Roode sends Storm into the barricade. Roode finds a beer but Storm blocks the shot to the head. They’ve been in the ring for about eight seconds in total so far. Roode sends him into the post but misses a chair shot. Storm sends him (you may be noticing a pattern emerging) into the boot of a fan but Roode sends him into the barricade. They’re actually rolling into the ring to break counts. Storm rams him into various steel objects but has a suplex reversed onto the floor.

They FINALLY get in the ring for more than a few seconds with Roode hitting a big clothesline to take over. He shoves the referee and throws Storm right back to the floor. Storm shoves the referee away again and that’s enough to throw it out at 6:24. I’m not even going to bother rating this as it wasn’t anything resembling a match.

They keep fighting up to the set again and then into the back. Storm rams him into various objects and they head out the door.

Hogan talks to some guy who was sent to find Joseph Park but it hasn’t worked. Hogan gets a phone call from Aces and 8’s who apparently have a corporate lawyer now. Hogan says they’ll play tonight and hangs up. He says he knows where Park is.

Aries goes to see Jeff Hardy about Bound For Glory. Hardy has had a Hall of Fame career and Aries wants that. He wants a bunch of sheep to follow him and he gets that by winning at BFG. Tonight, Aries is going to prove that anything Hardy can do, Aries can do better. I’d guess that means Aries vs. Ray tonight.

Here’s Tara to explain why she did what she did last week. She says Tessmacher used her to get on TV and make her own career. Tara’s new boyfriend, some Hollywood star who she doesn’t name, opened her eyes. Tara calls out Christy for some reason. Christy very slowly gets in and Tara accuses her of babying Tessmacher. Tara demands that Christy say who her favorite Knockout is. Christy says Tessmacher, which gets her a beating until Tessmacher makes the save.

Brooke Hogan promises consequences for Tara next week.

RVD talks about his BFG matches against Jerry Lynn and Abyss at BFG.

The TV Title is decided next week. No word on who is in the match.

Here’s Hogan…..again. He doesn’t like hearing about Aces and 8’s kidnapping Park but apparently has given up something in exchange for him. Apparently Hogan will go to Aces and 8’s clubhouse or whatever that is. The boss pops up on screen and says that next week it’s Clubhouse Rules. They have Park’s computer and break it because he figured it out. Park is in a cage and says he has the information in his head. They hit him in the head with a hammer and Hogan’s jaw is shaking as we cut to a break.

Video on Hardy and how much BFG means to him.

Here’s the world champ who says he’s the hunter rather than the hunted at BFG. He calls out Ray to prove he can beat Ray better than Hardy did last week. Ray comes out and runs his mouth as per usual, including yelling at a fan. If the fan touches Ray again, Ray is going to hit him in the face. Aries says he’ll hit the fan also, which is a pretty heelish thing to say. Ray says his catchphrase but Aries dives over the top to take him out.

Austin Aries vs. Bully Ray

After some punching on the floor by the champ, we head into the ring with Aries in control. Ray kicks Aries off the apron and into the barricade as we take a break. Back with Ray pulling on Aries’ face followed by a splash for two. Ray keeps pounding away with the big and hard shots to Aries while yelling at Earl Hebner at the same time. Earl argues back as you would expect him to and Aries gets in some offense to come back.

They keep slugging it out with Aries going down every time, only to make his comeback every single time. Ray rakes the eyes to finally stop him for a bit, only to run into a discus forearm. Aries guillotines him on the top rope and hits a missile dropkick for two. Aries can’t hit the brainbuster but Ray misses his drop down attempt. Ray whips him into the referee and Aries puts on the Last Chancery for the tap but there’s no one to see it. Ray loads up the chain and KO’s Aries with it in the corner for the pin at 12:21.

Rating: C+. This was their usual good match and I’m really hoping it sets up a threeway at the PPV (yes I just said that) as Ray has more than earned a major match at the biggest show of the year. The ending wasn’t clean and there’s nothing wrong with that. Ray’s reaction to winning the match makes this even better.

Post match Ray hugs Hebner in a funny bit. Ray holds up the title and goes to clock Aries with it but Hardy makes the save. Hardy holds up the title, causing Aries to freak out on him to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. I wasn’t that wild on this show. There was WAY too much Hogan on here and the Gut Check thing continues to be stupid. The focus was of course on Aces and 8’s again and we’ve reached the point where it’s almost impossible to buy this anymore. The group has been around for months now and NO ONE CAN FIND THE ROOM THEY’RE IN???

Now we’ve got another big deal set up with the Clubhouse thing, but again it focuses on Hogan. The problem is that it’s dragged on for so long now and they’re running out of places to go with it. We need a reveal of some sort soon and they’re running out of time before BFG. Not a great show tonight at all.

Results

AJ Styles/Kurt Angle vs. Chavo Guerrero/Hernandez went to a no contest when Daniels and Kazarian interfered

Douglas Williams b. Evan Markopolis – Arm Trap Headlock

James Storm vs. Bobby Roode went to a no contest

Bully Ray b. Austin Aries – Pin after a shot with a chain

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