Monday Night Raw
Date: October 2, 2006
Location: Landon Arena, Topeka, Kansas
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

This is the 700th show and since I’m trying to find this, #600 and #800, there’s no way of telling which order I’ll be doing these in. As for this show, the main event is Edge vs. Cena in a cage for the title with Johnny Boy defending. This is the go home show for No Mercy 2006, and believe it or not I haven’t done that one so there’s no link to it at the bottom. I’m not sure if that’s ever happened before. Let’s get to it.

We open with the cage around the ring.

Here’s DX to open the show. This has been the summer of their reunion and the eternally long feud with Vince and Shane. We get some clips of Unforgiven and the Cell match which was more or less the final destruction of Vince and Shane. The cage is up now. Before they can say much else, Coach comes out to yell at them. He makes a match on behalf of the McMahons.

D-Generation X vs. Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch/Highlanders/Viscera/Charlie Haas

This is under Texas Tornado rules. Everyone rushes the ring and are pretty easily dispatched. This is exactly what you would expect: DX dominates and barely breaks a sweat. Top rope elbow hits Charlie, Chin Music, Pedigree, done in about two and a half minutes.

Coach says this isn’t over yet. HHH says they’re throwing him out and taking over.

Intercontinental Title: Johnny Nitro vs. Jeff Hardy

Nitro is defending. JR gives us a factoid about Melina: she likes three way sex. Well you can’t say he beats around the…..never mind. Nitro controls to start but Jeff comes back with a quick Twist attempt. Melina tries to distract Jeff but only gets him to dive on Johnny as we take a break. Back with Nitro holding a reverse chinlock. During the break the slingshot dropkick from Hardy missed to give the champion control.

Jeff fights up but misses the Whisper in the Wind. Nitro stomps away in the corner and Jeff hits the post. Dang Melina can scream. Off to a surfboard submission and Jeff is in trouble. Jeff comes back with a mule kick and then a second one as Nitro is in some trouble very quickly. Whisper in the Wind gets two and Nitro heads to the floor. A baseball slide sets up the railing run and Melina gets taken out too. They both go up, resulting in Jeff backdropping him off the top and hitting the Swanton for the pin and the title.

Rating: C+. Pretty decent match here as both guys were still young and fast. It was clear that Jeff was going to be the bigger deal than his brother and that Nitro was going to be a decent sized star himself and this was a good example of that. Nothing great here but a title change is always cool to see.

Speaking of title changes, here’s a clip of the initial MITB cash-in to pump up the main event tonight.

DX harasses Coach through his locker room door.

Next week is the Raw Family Reunion.

Maria is with Jeff who says everyone is gunning for him. This turns into a discussion of Extreme Strip Poker on ECW. Melina comes in and screams for awhile until Jeff covers her mouth for a big pop.

Coach is on the phone with Vince who wants Coach to go to the ring. He opens his door really carefully and this is coming off like a BAD horror movie. Coach walks for awhile but stops when he sees HHH in front of him. He goes back the way he came and Shawn is waiting on him. I kid you not: a knockoff version of the theme from The Good, The Bad and The Ugly comes on, A FREAKING TUMBLEWEED ROLLS BY, and Coach runs into the women’s locker room. DX goes in with HHH being excited and Shawn covering his eyes.

HHH stops to flirt but Shawn pulls him through a door. Coach runs through another door and finds Big Dick Johnson dancing. Coach runs out and trips over a mop bucket, allowing DX to catch up to him. They stalk him out the door and ram his head into the production truck, because that’s how nice they are. They put him in a rolling trash bin and have a janitor throw garbage on him. This ate up like 6 minutes and was either really funny or REALLY stupid, depending on your tastes.

Clip of Cena winning the title back at the Rumble.

DX comes in to talk to the Spirit Squad and there’s a new dress code in effect, according to HHH, “by the orders of Mr. John Laurinitis,” complete with an imitation of him. They have new outfits for the Squad.

Umaga vs. Snitsky

This is when Umaga is still an unstoppable monster. He has a loser leaves Raw match next week with Kane. Power brawl to start with Snitsky getting a jumping shoulder block, but falling prey to a Samoan Drop. The running hip attack in the corner (IT’S UMAGA’S MOVE JOSH, NOT RIKISHI’S!!!) sets up the Spike for the quick pin. Squash. Umaga wouldn’t lose until January when Cena beat him.

Orton isn’t worried about Carlito. That takes him a minute or two to say.

Video on The Marine. That movie sucked but the girl looked great. Cena did his own stunts apparently.

Randy Orton vs. Carlito

This is a rematch from Unforgiven where Carlito tried a double springboard dive but Orton caught him in an RKO to end it. Carlito was in one of the biggest pushes of his career at this point but it was dying quickly. Orton starts off fast and sends Carlito into the post and out to the floor. Back in he does it again and Carlito is in trouble. Carlito comes back with a rana but Orton hits a single arm DDT for two. The arm work keeps going so Carlito comes back with a jumping back elbow. A springboard spinning senton gets two. Another springboard cross body is rolled through with Orton pulling the tights for the pin.

Rating: D. This was really boring with the arm work going on for awhile but not meaning anything at all. Carlito’s push was more or less done after this as Orton would team up with Edge in two weeks to form Rated RKO. Not the worst match ever, but did anyone care about Carlito? As in like EVER?

Edge cost Cena the world title at One Night Stand.

The Spirit Squad doesn’t want to wear the outfits. DX threatens to strip them of the tag titles because DX has that authority now. HHH: “Those guys are so gay.”

Cryme Tyme video on a cop having a doughnut. JTG slaps the coffee into his face. We get a chase around a fence so it’s agility training. Uh…yeah.

Nicky vs. Sgt. Slaughter

Nicky is more famous as Nick Nemeth, who is more famous as Dolph Ziggler. The Squad is in female cheerleader outfits. One of them has skid marks. Can we get this over with already? Why is Sarge in this? Sarge makes fun of them and the beating begins. He hooks the Cobra Clutch and spanks Nicky. A gutbuster gets two.

Sarge pounds on him in the corner but Nicky whips him in and SARGE DOES HIS OVER THE CORNER BUMP!!! HE’S 58 YEARS OLD HERE!!! That was insane!!! Nicky hooks a sleeper back inside which gets him nowhere. A modified Codebreaker gets two and Nicky works on the arm. DX pops up for a distraction and Sarge rolls him up for the pin. Too short to rate but DANG that bump was impressive.

Edge won the title back on an episode of Raw.

The Marine is premiering at a Marine base.

Women’s Title Tournament First Round: Mickie James vs. Victoria

DX says they have to fight in lingerie. I’m not complaining. Trish retired as champion so we need a new champion. They slug it out in the corner with Victoria taking over. Mickie comes back with right hands and a rana attempt but it gets countered into a Boston Crab. That doesn’t get anywhere so they tumble to the floor. Back in Mickie wins with a sunset flip. This went nowhere.

Cena and Edge fought again on SNME with Lita cheating to keep the belt on Edge.

We get some clips from an interview with Eric Bischoff about his book.

Bischoff and Masters are in the back when DX pops up for a book plug. Their words, not mine. He says DX was an NWO ripoff and that’s that. Eric leaves and HHH asks Masters if he wants to write a book. Masters says he’s thinking about it and HHH says “What are you going to call it? How To Lose 50 Pounds In Four Weeks?” That’s a steroids reference in case you didn’t get it. They laugh afterwards.

Cena and Edge also had a match at Summerslam. You may be noticing a pattern here. Edge won with brass knuckles.

The cage is lowered.

Then Cena won the title in a TLC match at Unforgiven, which gets us here.

Raw World Title: Edge vs. John Cena

In a cage. Just in case the videos they’ve given you all week haven’t been enough of a build, Edge also caused Cena to get beaten up by Booker and his crew. This gets big match intros which is certainly should. You can win by pinfall, submission or escape. Cena has a bad arm so Edge gets in what he can on it. That doesn’t work at all so Cena suplexes him for two. Edge goes back to the arm but walks into a belly to back suplex for two.

Cena whips Edge into the corner where he tries to climb out but Cena slams him off for two. FU is countered into an Edge-O-Matic for two. Off to an armbar which is quickly broken. Cena takes him down and goes up but Edge hits the arm again to knock him off the rope. A spear puts Cena into the cage but Edge can’t follow up. They both go up and Cena bulldogs him off the top as we take a break.

Back with Edge working on the arm but walking into a belly to belly suplex for two. A Canadian spinwheel kick takes Cena down but he can’t follow up. A delayed cover gets two. Edge goes for the door but Cena saves, only to get kicked in his arm. Now the arm goes into the cage and Edge goes for a climb. Cena goes after him and they slug it out while sitting on the top of the cage. John drops to the top rope and pulls Edge back in by the leg.

Edge suplexes Cena off the top rope and they’re both down again. The challenger covers for two and Cena starts his comeback with one arm. He loads up the FU but Edge grabs the cage to counter and rams Cena’s head into it. Cena tries it again and they go up the ropes, only for Edge to drop down and hit an electric chair drop for two. Edge goes for the door but Cena saves him.

Lita throws a chair in through the door to Edge before the cage is shut and gets ejected for it. Time for a slugout, resulting in Edge clotheslining the referee. Edge gets the chair and misses a shot to Cena’s head that would have killed him. Cena responds by killing Edge with an even bigger chair shot. There’s the STFU but there’s no referee. Cade and Murdoch run in for no apparent reason other than for DX to come in for the save. They take Cena out and drag him to the door but yep, here’s DX for the save. Shawn superkicks Murdoch into the door, which rams into Edge’s head. FU keeps the title on Cena.

Rating: B. This was a TV match and that makes the rating go up. The ending is really stupid because it’s all about DX again. Other than that, this was solid enough for a supershow main event. Cena vs. Edge was one of the most played out feuds in forever though and it got pretty dull over time, especially when it was clear Edge was never going to get the clean win over John. Still good though.

Overall Rating: B. Like I said, this was the supershow since there was a two month gap between Raw PPVs. The main event is solid and we got to see the IC Title change hands which is always cool. Not the best supershow they’ve ever done, but it’s certainly a fun Raw and bigger than most of their shows. DX was in full overkill here but thankfully Rated RKO would form soon to give them something to do.

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Victory Road 2012
Date: March 17, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

Welcome to the latest TNA filler PPV, Victory Road. That’s what’s plagued this show’s build: nothing on it is going to mean anything after tonight. It’s just a stop on the way to Lockdown, which has a few benefits actually. First of all, there aren’t any expectations for this show because none of it really matters. Second, sometimes it’s ok to not have a major main event every time as it makes the bigger main events seem more important. This has some potential to be good so let’s get to it.

We open with clips from last week’s Impact of Roode telling Sting that the business has passed him by and then Sting snapping.

Tenay and Taz talk about the show a bit and tell everyone to talk to them on Twitter. How about they just call the show instead?

Here’s Ray to open the show. He had said online that he was going to hold the show hostage. The idiot fans start a We Want D-Von chant. Ray says he’s trending worldwide because he’s taking this show over. The show isn’t continuing unless his match with Storm is a #1 contender match. Send referees, send security, send the police, he doesn’t care. Instead here’s Storm to say Ray has chicken legs. Storm says the #1 contendership is up for grabs RIGHT NOW.

James Storm vs. Bully Ray

So what was the point in having Ray come out there and talk for five minutes? The fans chant chicken legs and Ray beats Storm down into the corner. He goes for the beer, has a drink and walks into the Last Call for the pin at 1:08. Storm had legit ankle surgery this week which I’d bet is why the match wasn’t even a match. Storm only hit one move the entire time.

Aries answers Twitter questions. A fan wants to know when he’ll get to main event a show. Eric Bischoff comes in and tells JB to leave. JB: “Do you have any authority around here anymore?” Eric: “I can take you out so get out of here.” Is this tied into those comments Bischoff made on Twitter this week? Nothing of note is said here other than Aries is the main event no matter when he’s on the show.

Austin Aries vs. Zema Ion

Aries is the longest reigning champion in history and Ion won a match by DQ on Impact recently. James Storm is trending worldwide on Twitter. Geez you can’t escape it in any wrestling company anymore. The fans seem split so they start with a gymnastics routine resulting in Aries stealing the hairspray and laying on the top rope ala Shawn. Brainbuster is escaped and Ion is knocked to the floor off the top.

The suicide dive takes Ion down so Aries grabs a phone and tweets. Oh give me a break. Dropkick to the back gets two for the champ. Ion gets knocked to the apron and manages to guillotine Aries and take over. Tazz reads the tweet from Aries because that’s what you watch wrestling for: Twitter updates. Ion hits a corkscrew crossbody off the middle rope for two.

Zema pounds on him for awhile and tries Aries’ pendulum elbow with no success. Aries comes back with an atomic drop and pounds him into the corner. Ion loads the hairspray into his tights but is knocked down by a spinning forearm smash. Aries hits a knee crusher into a belly to belly followed by the pendulum elbow for two.

Ion gets knocked into the corner and does the old switch move of grabbing the title but as the referee takes it out, he pulls out the hairspray which goes into Aries’ eyes for two. Ion tries a superplex but Aries counters into a sunset bomb to put both guys down. Aries is still mostly blind. Not that it matters as he hits the brainbuster and rolls into the Last Chancery for the tap out at 11:04.

Rating: B-. Aries is a de facto face now due to pure crowd support but it’s going to be interesting to see what they do with him. He’s outgrown the X Division which is why the weight limit addition has been a bad thing for it. He’s going to have to move up soon though because there’s no point to him fighting these low level X guys anymore.

Tazz reads another tweet.

The Motorcity Machineguns are coming back soon.

We recap the tag title feud. The idea here is that Morgan and Crimson are champions but they started arguing over who should get the win and it resulted in them losing the titles. They won the right to a rematch here tonight and they’ve promised to put their differences aside.

Tag Titles: Samoa Joe/Magnus vs. Crimson/Matt Morgan

After TNA’s Powerpoint about the match we’re ready to go. Joe’s has a mowhawk now. Morgan and Crimson almost get into a fight over who should start. TWITTER UPDATE: Austin Aries is trending. Crimson and Magnus start and Magnus takes him down with a clothesline. Off to Joe to a big pop and he pounds Crimson down before quickly tagging Magnus back in.

Crimson goes to the corner but won’t tag. Instead he goes to the floor to get a breath and comes back in with a snapmare and clothesline. Off to a chinlock with Magnus in trouble. The idea here is that Crimson wants to do everything himself because he doesn’t need Morgan’s help. The fans chant that they want Morgan. Keep in mind that they wanted D-Von earlier so how much can they be trusted?

Spinebuster plants Magnus for two. Crimson hooks his cravate but Magnus fights out of it. He beats Crimson down well enough to make the tag but Crimson still won’t tag out. Joe snaps off punches so Crimson goes up and dives at Joe, who does the always cool step aside. Joe sends him to the corner and Morgan shoves Crimson out of the way and tags himself in. Morgan cleans house but Crimson tags himself back in after about thirty seconds.

Morgan tags himself back in and Crimson walks out. The champs destroy Morgan with double team combos (including a big boot that missed by about 9 inches to the left). Crimson says he’s the winner of this team so Morgan tries to fight alone. He manages to take the champs down but Crimson spears Morgan, allowing the champions to hit their finisher, resulting in the pin by Magnus at 10:12.

Rating: C. The match was a backdrop for an angle more than anything else which is ok. Crimson turning heel was something they almost had to do because his run could only go so long without focusing more on the winning streak. There isn’t much to say about the match but it wasn’t bad or anything.

During the replays we hear more Tweets.

JB apologizes for the Bischoff incident from earlier and asks Roode a question from Twitter about his main events at tonight’s show and then Lockdown. Sting’s career ends tonight and then at Lockdown….we’re not sure what’s going to happen because Storm pops up. He doesn’t want a match. He wants a fight and he wants it right now.

Taz and Tenay debate hashtags. Seriously, that’s what we’ve gotten to tonight.

TV Title: Robbie E vs. ???

This is another open challenge because we don’t have time to get the TV Title on TV since Garrett Bischoff needs to get his five minutes every week. Robbie says that there’s no open challenge tonight because everyone is afraid of him. The fans want RVD. Oh apparently the invitational is going to happen tonight but now fans can take him up on it. They go around the ring and Robbie makes fun of fans, including three overweight women. He asks Val, but says they’ll be “wrestling” later. Big Rob says she’s not on the list. This goes on forever. The open challenge is officially canceled so they’re going to pose instead. We have a challenger.

TV Title: Robbie E vs. D-Von

Yes, this is what’s on PPV. He comes through the crowd for some reason. Robbie backs off so Brian Hebner says we’re doing this. D-Von is in street clothes. There’s another Tweet. One man flapjack puts Robbie down and a clothesline puts him on the floor. Matt Morgan is trending. Robbie tries to get a chair but BROOKE HOGAN stops him. I kid you not, she’s in the front row and grabbed the chair from him. Back in and D-Von runs him over with clotheslines and shoulder blocks. A splash in the corner sets up a clothesline for two. A spinebuster gives D-Von the title at 3:02. Just retire the title. Now.

Rating: F. D-Von Dudley is a singles champion. Never mind that it’s 2012. D-Von freaking Dudley is a singles champion. That doesn’t need any more explanation. Oh and Brooke Hogan was involved in this. They did fire Russo didn’t they? I mean….D-VON JUST WON A TITLE. With the roster they have, they pick him? Who thinks that’s a good idea?

Dixie says Slammiversary is going to be in Dallas/Fort Worth. She’ll be ringside for the main event tonight.

We recap Gail vs. Madison. They were friends, then they started fighting, then Madison snuck into a battle royal to become #1 contender, then they lost the tag titles and here’s the match.

Knockouts Title: Madison Rayne vs. Gail Kim

Madison’s looking good as always. D-Von is the #1 trend worldwide. It’s true: 2012 is the apocalypse. Very slow match to start with Madison in control. She chokes in the corner as Taz reads tweets. Gail takes the knee out but Madison pops up so they can slug it out. Gail hits a middle rope cross body and a missile dropkick for two each. This is going nowhere. Gail tries to use the tights but gets two. Taz misreads a Twitter handle and Tenay cracks up. It wasn’t funny but then again Twitter handles shouldn’t be read here. Eat Defeat is avoided but the second attempt works at 7:07. I can’t believe I had that little to say in seven minutes.

Rating: D. This was nothing. Madison looked good but that’s about it. This show has been pretty awful so far as the constant Twitter references are really taking me out of the show. This is worse than even WWE with that stuff. The match had no heat at all, probably because everyone was in shock at the previous match.

It’s 9:22 and we have three matches left.

JB is with Daniels and Kaz and asks something he heard about on Twitter recently: why has his attitude changed? Before he can answer, Daniels says he runs the show here. In a nice bit of continuity, Daniels has tape under his eye from the cut Anderson gave him “last week”.

We recap AJ/Anderson vs. Daniels/Kaz. In chapter 19874 of Daniels vs. AJ, Kaz has apparently been coerced or brainwashed into going against AJ. Daniels thinks maybe the problem is with AJ instead of everyone else. Styles says he’s not going to associate with friends anymore, so he brought in Anderson to help him.

Christopher Daniels/Kazarian vs. Mr. Anderson/AJ Styles

As is the custom, we update Twitter before we get the match going. Anderson and Kaz start Anderson throws him around the ring and it’s off to AJ quickly. Daniels comes in to meet him and they fight over a headlock. They run each other over and AJ hooks an armdrag to grab an armbar. Dixie Carter is in the front row with the host of some Spike show called Repo Games. He’ll be at Impact also. Ten points if they bring in Barry Darsow for a showdown.

Anderson and AJ pinball Daniels back and forth with right hands. Everything breaks down and Kaz and Daniels are thrown into each other. Anderson drops elbows on Daniels and it’s AJ vs. Daniels once things calm down. AJ hits a spinning delayed vertical suplex for two. Back to Anderson but Daniels gets in a knee so he can tag. Kaz gets thrown down quickly and Styles comes back in. The tags are very fast.

An elbow puts AJ onto the floor and Daniels takes over. Daniels hooks an abdominal stretch and AJ is in trouble. A boot to the face keeps him down, so LET’S READ TWEETS! This is ridiculous. The show is already bad but this is making it unbearable. Daniels stays on the ribs but when he and Kaz try to double team, AJ manages to clothesline Daniels and Pele Kaz to put them both down. Hot tag to Anderson who cleans house. Mic Check to Kaz is broken up and Daniels hits an STO to take him down. Springboard clothesline takes Kaz down and everything breaks down.

In a SWEET counter, AJ tries the moonsault into the DDT but Daniels drops to his back and puts his feet in the air so that AJ slams his face into them. Daniels and Anderson go to the floor after AJ makes a blind tag. AJ tries a springboard sunset flip but Kaz counters into the Fade to Black, but AJ rolls through into the Styles Clash for the pin at 13:58.

Rating: C+. The decent match made the show better, but this show has really taken its toll on me. AJ vs. Daniels is a feud that I’m tired of. They’ve feuded literally for years on and off and AJ always comes out on top, which makes things pretty boring at the end of the day. Pretty good match though.

Angle is in the back and says hi to his son. Usually he doesn’t let him watch violence, but Angle wants his son Cody to see his son hero get destroyed. He talks about the things he’s going to do to Jeff with a sick happiness in his voice. Tonight, Jeff gets an Extreme Makeover. See, this was what you call a promo. No Twitter questions were needed, and it actually got me thinking about the match. Why is that the first one of these tonight?

We recap Angle vs. Hardy. Angle cost him the world title because his son likes Jeff Hardy too much so he’s going to beat Hardy up for it.

Jeff Hardy vs. Kurt Angle

Hardy goes around the ring to shake hands and hug fans, including hugging Brooke. The fans are somewhat split but Hardy is getting louder chants. Their match a year and a half ago at No Surrender was awesome so maybe this can be good too. Feeling out process to start and Kurt bails to the floor. With that, this is officially longer than Jeff’s Victory Road match last year. Back inside and Jeff runs him out again. They have a lot of time left in the show so they’re probably stalling a bit.

Back in and Kurt takes it to the mat with a chinlock. Jeff counters so Kurt elbows him in the face. Kurt takes a knee to the gut and seemed to land awkwardly. He seems ok though. Hardy comes out of the corner with a headscissors to send Kurt to the outside. Hardy controls out there but back inside Kurt pounds him down in the corner. Twitter stuff. Hardy comes back with the legdrop between the legs and a dropkick for two.

Out to the floor again and Hardy rams Kurt’s head into a chair. Kurt tries to ram him into the steps but Hardy reverses and it’s Kurt that crashes. Jeff sets up the steps for Poetry in Motion but crashes into the barricade. And they wonder why he’s addicted to painkillers. Jeff’s tailbone hit the barricade and Kurt goes after him. He gets two inside and hits a suplex for two. Off to a rear chinlock.

Jeff fights up but walks into a belly to belly to put him right back down. Hardy gets his feet up in the corner and a clothesline to put Kurt down. They get back up and Jeff throws punches to set up the Whisper in the Wind for two. Twist of Fate is countered into Rolling Germans, four in this case. Angle Slam is countered into the Twisting Stunner but Angle runs the corner to counter the Swanton with the belly to belly.

Kurt hooks the ankle lock but Jeff kicks off after a few seconds. Angle misses a charge and hits the post and a Twist of Fate gets two. Angle rolls to the outside and Hardy rams his head into the steps a few times. There goes the shirt and he loads up the Swanton but Kurt gets the knees up. Angle Slam gets two. Kurt has a cut over his left eye. He chokes Jeff with one of the sleeves that Hardy wears but another Slam is countered into Twist #3. Both guys are down. Back up and the mule kick puts Kurt down. Swanton hits but Jeff covers sloppily, allowing Kurt to roll him up and grab the rope for the pin (Jeff’s shoulder was up) at 19:45.

Rating: B. I’ve said this a lot of times but it’s still true: a lot of the time, the solution to your problems is to have a good wrestling match. This started slow but they got into Kurt’s formula which is guaranteed to be at least good. The ending sets up a rematch, likely as captains of the Lethal Lockdown teams next month. Match of the night by far.

We recap the show to fill in more time.

Roode vs. Sting is now falls count anywhere, no DQ.

Jeremy gives us a long Twitter update and asks Sting a question. He says he’s tired of Facebooking and Tweeting so it’s time to wrestle.

We recap the main event, which is Sting tormenting Roode, which Roode says is because Sting is jealous of Roode.

Sting vs. Bobby Roode

Non-title and no holds barred. After some big match intros we’re ready to go. This is just no holds barred, despite them saying falls count anywhere earlier. Do those go together now? Sting starts off fast and beats the champion down pretty easily. He hits a lot of clotheslines and knocks Roode to the floor. They fight up the ramp (which means Sting beats the tar out of him) and then back to ringside to send Roode into the steps.

The fans chant “over here” so Sting beats him up wherever chants the loudest. Roode manages to send him into the post but Sting counters a chair shot. Roode goes into the barricade and Sting knocks him into the crowd. Back to ringside and Sting takes a thumb to the eye. The champ rams Sting’s leg into the post and Sting is in trouble. Roode stays on the knee for a few minutes while Taz reads a Tweet from an 85 year old grandmother.

It’s figure four time but Sting rolls over after about a minute. Roode continues to channel his inner Flair and chops at Sting, which just like Flair’s, don’t work at all on him. Now Sting goes after the knees and after a superplex, it’s Scorpion time. Roode makes the rope and comes back with a spear for two. The champ brings in a chair and sets for either a powerbomb or piledriver but Sting backdrops him to the apron. Sting tries a Death Drop onto the chair but he rams his own head into the chair. Roode wakes up and covers for the pin at 16:50.

Rating: C+. The ending brought this down a bit. Sting matches have a really bad habit of ending out of nowhere. This also really doesn’t help Roode because Roode lucks out again. Roode needed to go over strong here but instead he looks like he got lucky to win the match over a part time wrestler. That’s not good, again. Has he won a major match on his own merits since he’s been champion? Sting is great in this role as part time wrestler and as a special attraction as he can still do well enough out there.

Post match it’s time for the big evil angle. Roode gets the chair and yells at Dixie, then pulls her over the railing and into the ring. Sting makes the save but once he turns to check on Dixie, Roode hits him with the chair. Roode gets some duck tape and ties Sting to the bottom ropes. He goes to hit Sting with the chair but Dixie is untying him. Roode gets in her face and yells at her, rubbing her face for some reason. He yells at her…and that’s it. He doesn’t hit her, he doesn’t shove her, nothing. This would have been more effective, except NO ONE CARES ABOUT DIXIE CARTER!

Overall Rating: D+. The last 50 minutes of the show brought it up A LOT, but earlier on the show was absolutely dreadful. The in ring work earlier was ok to bad, but the point of this show was the Twitter. They went WAY too far with that nonsense where even the wrestlers weren’t answering the questions. It got stupid and was really taking away from the show, which was just ok anyway. On top of that, we had Storm cut short (not their fault) and D-Von winning a title. I still can’t get over that. Anyway, bad show but the last part helped it. They’re probably lucky that non many people were watching tonight though.

Results
James Storm b. Bully Ray – Last Call
Austin Aries b. Zema Ion – Last Chancery
Samoa Joe/Magnus b. Matt Morgan/Crimson – Middle Rope Elbow To Morgan
D-Von b. Robbie E – Spinebuster
AJ Styles/Mr. Anderson b. Christopher Daniels/Kazarian – Styles Clash to Kazarian
Kurt Angle b. Jeff Hardy – Pin while holding the rope
Robert Roode b. Sting – Pin after Sting hit his head on a chair

I’m fairly optimistic about this show.The good thing about this show is that it has no pressure on it because it’s just a stop on the way to Lockdown.  On the other hand, the bad thing about this show is that nothing on it really matters because it’s just a stop on the road to Lockdown.  What that means is that it has the potential to be something fun in the moment but that it’s probably not going to mean anything past tomorrow night.  That’s probably a good thing though, given that they’ll start the build to Lockdown soon after this.

Roode should and probably will beat Sting.  Roode has been feuding with Sting since winning the title and they need to put this behind them.  A decisive victory over Sting with a clean (as clean as you can get in a no holds barred match that is) pin would do a lot for Roode and would make him look like a bigger deal than he is right now.  Should be fun.

Storm over Ray, duh.  This doesn’t need much of an explanation.

Tag champs to retain as the Morgan vs. Crimson feud goes to Lockdown, hopefully with a turn in there somewhere.

Aries to retain, just due to me not wanting Ion on my TV screen anymore than he has to be.

Hardy over Angle but this is going to Lethal Lockdown.

Uh….Gail and AJ/Anderson win via coin flip.

The TV Title…..nobody cares.

Thoughts/predictions?

Impact Wrestling
Date: March 8, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

If I remember right there’s this show and then another before Victory Road. The majority of the card is already set and we should be getting more of Sting vs. Roode’s build up tonight. I barely remember Impact from last week and that’s probably not a good thing. As for the rest of the PPV the card is also set and I’m looking forward to Storm vs. Ray, which I didn’t expect to happen. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the Garrett/Eric situation.

Garrett arrives earlier today and isn’t worried about what Flair said earlier today.

Immortal (yes they’re really calling them that still) opens us up. It’s Flair, Eric and Gunner if you’re keeping track. There’s going to be a tag match later, presumably Garrett and a partner vs. Flair/Gunner. Eric thanks Flair for threatening Garrett. Garrett is watching in the back. Oh Gunner has to pick a partner too. Here’s Angle who apparently wants to be Gunner’s partner. Eric is very enthusiastic about Angle wanting to be the partner. Angle says he hates Garrett because Garrett disrespects his dad. Hogan is out of the country apparently.

Sting is putting the makeup on in the back and talks to Roode. Eric Young comes in and Sting looks embarrassed. Eric wants to impress ODB so Sting calls him Bobby and gives ODB a shot at the Knockout Tag Titles. Her partner for the women’s tag titles: Eric.

Knockout Tag Titles: Eric Young/ODB vs. Gail Kim/Madison Rayne

Eric starts with Gail but ODB tags herself in. Gail runs and is promptly clotheslined. Off to Madison who looks great in red. The champs work over ODB with some double teaming. Madison takes a clothesline to the ribs which was supposed to be a spear I think. Either way it allows the double tag and Eric locks up with the referee. Eric puts both girls in an airplane spin and ODB clotheslines them both down. There go Eric’s pants and Madison hits Eric with a title, knocking him onto Gail for the pin and the titles at 5:48.

Rating: D. I hate this angle. I’ve made that quite clear over the past few months and I don’t think it really requires a lot of explanation. Eric Young and ODB are supposed to be funny but they aren’t. It’s the most forced comedy I’ve seen in a very long time. It’s like taking the ingredients of a cake and putting them on a table and calling it a cake. It doesn’t quite work.

Eric proposes post match but we cut away before the answer.

Post break he actually asks (he was just on a knee with a ring before) and ODB says nothing. Instead she takes the ring and drops to her knee. Eric says yes.

Mr. Parks, presumably Abyss’ dad (James Mitchell anyone?) arrived earlier. He looks like Penn Jillette.

Ray says Storm isn’t making it to Lockdown.

Aries gets an e-mail from Sting saying Ion gets his title match tonight. “So why should they buy the PPV then?” The second biggest wrestling company in America ladies and gentlemen.

X-Division Title: Austin Aries vs. Zema Ion

Aries takes over to start and puts Ion on the mat, resulting in a lap around the ring. He Stuns Ion on the ropes then adds a hilo and elbow for two. Ion hits a spinning dive out of the corner and takes it to the floor. Ion sets for a dive to the floor but gets caught by a running Aries. He chops Ion to the floor but misses a dive. Back in Ion rakes the eyes and goes for his hairspray. The brainbuster is countered and we almost lose a referee. Ion misses the hairspray and Aries gets the can, spraying it in Ion’s eyes for the DQ at 3:52.

Rating: C. Just ok here but I guess it allows them to have a rematch at the PPV. I mean, we didn’t need to see the match for the first time on PPV or anything so we can just show part of it here right? Anyway, not much of a match due to the time. Also with this win, Aries officially has the longest title reign in the history of the X Title.

Mr. Parks talks to Velvet and apparently he’s Abyss’ brother. The family is looking for Abyss and Velvet thinks it was kind of creepy.

Here’s Ray to say that he’s the guy who knocked Storm’s brains out last week. He demands that Sting come out here and make him the #1 contender. Here’s Sting who asks what Ray wants. Ray keeps saying Bobby Roode so Sting says…..ok and it’s after the break. Ray is stunned but happy.

After a break, Sting says that this isn’t a title match but I don’t think Ray knows that.

Bully Ray vs. Bobby Roode

Ray yells a lot and they lock up. Roode grabs a headlock but a shoulder runs him over. The champ slaps Ray and looks all terrified. He fires off some kicks and elbows but walks into a backdrop and side slam for two. Ray wins a quick slugout but Roode hits something close to his Blockbuster for two. Bully makes a face comeback and hits a Rock Bottom for two. Big boot misses and Roode spears him down for two. Roode goes for the chain but Ray knocks Roode down in the corner. And here’s Storm to chase Ray off. He superkicks Roode and it’s thrown out at roughly 6:30.

Rating: C. Ray’s face comeback in there was kind of weird. He’s one of those heels that is working very well but the Impact Zone is screwing it up by cheering him as they do with everyone else. The match wasn’t much but with about six minutes and no real finish, what else could they really do?

Garrett is confident about his partner.

Abyss’ brother talks to Morgan/Crimson but can’t get any answers. They have the Robs tonight.

Crimson/Matt Morgan vs. Robbie T/Robbie T

They’re in matching pink cardigans. This is for the #1 contendership. Crimson and Big Rob start and Crimson takes over. The referee gets distracted though and the clipboard goes upside Crimson’s head to put him in peril. Big Rob poses too long, allowing Crimson to avoid a shot and bring in Morgan. House is cleaned, Carbon Footprint hits but Crimson tags himself in to steal the pin at 4:00.

Rating: D. Nothing to see here at all but it furthered the big guys having issues which is the issue going into the title match. I’m sure it’ll lead to Morgan vs. Crimson again eventually which isn’t something that I’m going to get behind but it’s logical at least. Nothing here though and it was a formality.

AJ has a surprise for Kaz and Daniels.

Angle and Gunner aren’t worried about Garrett and he’s going to the hospital.

Here’s AJ to a big reaction. He talks about the tenth anniversary coming up and how they’re here because of the people. Daniels cuts him off and says he came back to stand by AJ’s side. However that got him nowhere so he decided to make it about himself. Kaz says that AJ is talking about all of the people that have turned on him so Kaz says that maybe it’s AJ that is the problem. That can’t be though, because he’s the Phenomenal AJ Styles so it COULDN’T be him right? AJ says Kaz is the reason he won’t associate himself with friends anymore. Now he’ll associate with a real….what’s the word he’s thinking of here?

Cue Anderson (now with his catchphrase instead of his name being shouted) to clear the ring. He’s back.

Garrett’s partner is ready.

From what I’ve seen, apparently Joe Parks is Abyss sans mask. I knew he looked familiar.

Gunner/Kurt Angle vs. Garrett Bischoff/???

It’s Jeff Hardy, shocking no one. Garrett is in the main event for the first time. For those of you paying attention, he’s now associated with Hogan, Flair, Sting, Angle and Hardy. Behold the power of nepotism people. Angle and Gunner jump them to start and it’s Hardy vs. Angle to get us going. Hardy takes a beating but manages to get a clothesline to take Angle down for about 20 seconds.

Off to Gunner as Garrett can’t get in yet. Back with Hardy taking a beating from Angle. Gunner comes in for a back elbow for two and it’s off to Angle again. Anderson vs. Daniels next week. Out to the floor and Gunner rams Jeff into the steel. Back in Jeff dives for the corner but gets caught in an ankle lock. He makes the rope and Gunner comes back in with a suplex for two.

Gunner hooks a sleeper as we’re running low on time. Jeff gets up and hits a Whisper in the Wind to put Gunner down but Angle distracts Garrett. It prevents a tag (kind of, as the referee wouldn’t have been there anyway) and Angle pulls Jeff back into the corner. And never mind as Jeff makes the tag a second later anyway. Gunner cleans house and hits a falling Diamond Cutter (Angle lands the same but he would be on Garrett’s back. Garrett fell forward if that makes more sense) on Kurt for two. Everything breaks down and the Swanton pins Kurt clean at 14:31.

Rating: C. Main event tag formula was at work here, but dang man did we really need to have Garrett in this spot on the card? He didn’t really do much at least which is probably a good thing. Jeff vs. Angle was a second story here but it didn’t get the focus that Garrett did. Anyway at least it wasn’t horrible.

Overall Rating: C-. This was a step down for them. We had a show with the world champion in action, two title matches (one with a title change) and a return of a former world champion, but Garrett Bischoff was in the main event. Other than that, the show was just kind of there. Stuff happened (without being advertised in advance of course) but nothing really that huge. Anderson is back and is thrown into AJ vs. Daniels so it doesn’t really mean much. Not a horrible show but it didn’t click like they were shooting for.

Results
Eric Young/ODB b. Gail Kim/Madison Rayne – Eric fell on Gail after being hit with a title belt
Zema Ion b. Austin Aries via DQ when Aries sprayed hairspray in Ion’s eyes
Bully Ray vs. Bobby Roode went to a no contest
Matt Morgan/Crimson b. Robbie E/Robbie T – Carbon Footprint to Robbie E

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Impact Wrestling
Date: February 23, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

The interesting part of this show is that during the week since the last Impact, Sting sent out a tweet that read “I’m Done.” Now while it’s likely that this is just a storyline element for his presumed match with Roode at the PPV, it should be interesting to see where this goes. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of how Roode has cheated to keep the title every time.

Here’s Roode to open the show in an awesome looking suit. Roode talks about the tweet from Sting that says he’s done. Sting will be here tonight though to tell the world that he’s done. He talks about how Sting has been to war with guys like Luger, Flair, Vader and Hogan, but it was Roode that made Sting give up. The only thing he has to say to Sting is don’t let the door hit you on the way out. I liked this promo a lot.

Morgan yells at Crimson about spearing him to lose the titles. Crimson says it’ll be cool tonight.

Tag Titles: Crimson/Matt Morgan vs. Samoa Joe/Magnus

No break before the match which is a plus. The challengers jump the champs before the match and it’s Joe vs. Morgan to start. Off to Crimson vs. Magnus as Tenay plugs the MMA show that debuts after this. A running knee to the chest puts Magnus down and the overly complicated former finisher that he called the Red Alert gets two. Joe pulls Magnus out of the way so that Crimson hits the post as we take a break.

Back with Crimson’s comeback attempt being stopped by a rake to the eyes. A spinebuster puts Joe down though and is enough to bring in Magnus. Discus clothesline puts Joe down and it’s an old school double noggin knocker. Magnus gets a boot up in the corner but jumps into a spinning Rock Bottom for two. The challengers take over but again Crimson accidentally hits Morgan, this time with a clothesline. The champs hit their finishing combo for the pin at 9:00.

Rating: C. Hopefully this ends this feud and we can start up Morgan vs. Crimson so we can get Crimson on to something else. He’s been stuck with Morgan for months now and it’s not doing either of them any favors. It’s good that the tag champs keep the belts here too so they can go on and do something else. Decent match too so I can’t complain much here at all.

Here’s Brandon Jacobs, the running back from the Giants. He talks about being a Super Bowl Champion and being here with his friend James Storm last week. Then Bully Ray jumped him during the celebration. Well tonight he’s back and he wants another shot at Bully. His talking really isn’t that bad. He clearly isn’t used to talking but he gets the point across and doesn’t sound like he’s miserable being here.

Cue Ray who brags about being a 23 time champion as opposed to Jacobs’ one. Jacobs isn’t saying anything but the fans cheer his name. He invites Ray in so Ray yells at the fans some more. Ray teases coming down but stops to make fun of Jacobs’ yards in the Super Bowl. Jacobs says he’ll come get Ray. He gets out of the ring and Ray runs as we go to a break.

Back and Jacobs is still looking for Ray. He runs into Storm and Hardy. Storm whispers something to him and that’s that.

Zema Ion vs. Alex Shelley

Ion jumps Alex to start and sprays hairspray. Aries comes out with popcorn and wine to watch the show. Alex hits a sweet slingshot splash for two. Ion vs. Aries at Victory Road. Missile dropkick knocks Ion to the floor but he rams Shelley’s head into the apron to take over. Back in Alex hits a dragon screw leg whip and then he chops away. A clothesline puts Ion on the floor and Shelley hits a suicide dive. Ion puts the hairspray can into his tights and shoves Shelley almost into the ref. He sprays Alex in the eyes and a double knee Shining Wizard ends this at 3:56.

Rating: C. Not bad here but they’ve got an issue with the heel vs. heel title match that they’re going to have to do. That being said, it could actually work with Ion as he’s not really friends with Aries so it works out pretty well. It’s not going to be a classic or anything but it should be ok.

We recap Garrett/Hogan vs. Eric/Gunner from the PPV.

Garrett says he isn’t discouraged by what his dad said last week. Hogan questions if Garrett should keep going because Garrett has nothing to prove. It basically turns into Hogan saying your life will suck and Garrett saying he’ll keep going for a few minutes.

Madison says Sting hasn’t been fair to him so she hopes he’s gone. As for Gail, Madison being the #1 contender means nothing for their friendship.

Gail Kim vs. ODB

Eric is here with ODB. Gail implies she’s better looking than ODB and I can’t say I disagree. Eric gets up on the apron for a tag. ODB takes her down with a chest bump and Tenay talks about Chris Brown for some reason. There’s a bronco buster to Gail and a fall away slam. Gail tries to hold onto the ropes for mercy and manages to kick ODB in the head. Eric keeps trying to get in the ring because he’s crazy you see.

Now he’s on the apron and Gail hits kind of a running shoulder to the ribs in the corner for two. Gail hooks the Octopus Hold but ODB counters with a side slam. Madison comes out for no apparent reason as ODB takes a shot from the flask. A corner Thesz Press gets two but the Bam (TKO) is countered into Eat Defeat for the pin at 5:58.

Rating: D+. Not a bad match here but the story of “I love you even though I keep screwing things up” is getting a little boring. Then again they’re still miles ahead of the Divas so I can’t complain. Not to mention ODB didn’t help anything as she and Eric don’t amuse me at all. Hey they’re wacky and different. We get it already and we got it months ago.

AJ wants the world title.

Video on Jesse Sorensen who talks about what it was like when he couldn’t get up. His mom talks about how scared she was.

TV Title: AJ Styles vs. Robbie E

AJ is all serious again. He rams Robbie into the corners and hits a backbreaker to control early. He hooks the bridging Indian Deathlock with the chinlock but lets it go. Robbie crawls to the floor and hides behind Big Rob. Back in Robbie takes over and hits a Russian legsweep for two. Robbie beats on him a little more until AJ makes his comeback. There’s the dropkick and AJ hits the corner clothesline to set up a pumphandle backbreaker for two. Big Rob comes in to break up the Clash but doesn’t touch AJ so we keep going. Pele hits and here are Daniels and Kaz with Kaz interfering for the DQ at 4:52.

Rating: C-. Not bad here but FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THINGS GOOD AND HOLY GET AJ AWAY FROM THESE TWO ALREADY!!! We get it: Daniels hates AJ and always will. I’m even ok with it being AJ vs. Kaz but drop the Daniels aspect. They’ve done that feud so many times and I just do not care anymore.

Daniels looks shocked at what Kaz just did.

Jeff Hardy/James Storm vs. Bully Ray/Kurt Angle

Ray cuts off his big match intro and does it himself. Storm gets the crowd fired up pre match and brings out Jacobs to be in their corner. Storm and Angle start us off and James controls. Ray distracts him though and Angle gets in a shot to take over. Hardy comes in and Angle runs. Back from a break with Hardy gets two on Ray from the Whisper in the Wind. Hardy gets beaten down for awhile and we hear that AJ has demanded a gauntlet match with Kaz and Daniels.

Angle comes in and suplexes Hardy before he can get out. Back to Ray who gets caught by the mule kick and it’s off to Storm. He cleans house for a bit but Ray takes him down. They get a table but it gets kicked into their faces. The good guys try to set up a table but Ray and Angle make the save. Last Call out of nowhere takes Angle down and Jacobs gets in. They get in a three point stance and Storm hits Ray in the face. Jacobs chokeslams him through the table (good one too) and Storm gets the pin at 13:23. The referee is totally cool with this apparently.

Rating: C. I wasn’t wild on this one. I’m not wild on most main event tags though because they don’t really mean anything. Jacobs’ thing is hopefully over now but at least he came off pretty well here. I’m assuming it’ll be Hardy vs. Angle at Victory Road but it hasn’t been announced yet I don’t think.

Jacobs says Storm’s catchphrase to Ray and drinks some beer.

Here’s Sting for the announcement about him being done. He talks about how Roode has pushed him over the edge. Here’s Roode who says that Sting needs to admit to everyone that it was Roode that won the war. Sting says Roode didn’t win any war and there go the glasses. Sting says Roode helped him out and woke him up. He smears some black paint on his face and says that there’s no more half doing it and no more Mr. nice guy. He makes Sting vs. Roode at Victory Road and Roode is panicked. Roode goes to kick him low but Sting catches it and kicks Roode low instead.

Overall Rating: B. I have very few complaints about this show. They set up Sting vs. Roode at Victory Road among a few other matches on that show. Also the Jacobs thing was fine and there wasn’t a bad match on the whole show. This worked pretty well and was one of the better Impacts I can remember in awhile. Gee they got rid of Russo and things got better. Who would have guessed that?

Results
Magnus/Samoa Joe b. Crimson/Matt Morgan – Middle Rope Elbow To Morgan
Zima Ion b. Alex Shelley – Double Knee Shining Wizard
Gail Kim b. ODB – Eat Defeat
AJ Styles b. Robbie E via DQ when Kazarian interfered
James Storm/Jeff Hardy b. Bully Ray/Kurt Angle – Storm pinned Ray after a chokeslam from Brandon Jacobs

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Turning Point 2004
Date: December 5, 2004
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Attendance: 700
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Don West

This is the second ever three hour PPV from TNA so don’t expect much in the way of groundbreaking stuff. That being said, the main event is one of the most famous as well as scariest moments ever in TNA. Also to the best of my knowledge, this is Randy Savage’s last wrestling match ever. Let’s get to it.

Oh and I forgot: this is the DUMB angle where TNA sent guys to a WWE show with a bunch of gifts and filmed the WWE wrestlers talking and chatting with TNA guys. For some reason, this is SCANDALOUS and we see the tape tonight.

The opening video is about the six man main event with Hardy/Styles/Savage saying they love the business and the Kings of Wrestling (Hall/Nash/Jarrett) in Elvis suits saying it’s about them. This goes on way too long and has way too many Elvis jokes.

Vince and HHH impersonators say they’ll never allow the tape to air. Abyss comes up with balloons and Fake HHH runs from him. This could be a really long night.

Tag Titles: Ron Killings/BG James vs. Eric Young/Bobby Roode

3 Live Kru are the champions. They won the titles from the Canadians a month ago, making this a rematch. Young and BG get things going with Young being rammed into all of the buckles. Young tries to steal BG’s gyrating punches so the Kru hits their version of What’s Up. Here’s Roode to face Truth. Truth is a replacement for Konnan who is injured so this is under the Freebird Rule.

Truth hits his usual not-WWE stuff and gets two off a spinning kick. The Canadians double team Truth with a double backbreaker for two. They take over with Roode bringing Young back in. Young stomps on Truth in the corner but Truth won’t even sell it at all. He pulls himself up and hits a missile dropkick. No tag as it’s back to Roode. They try their own What’s Up but Truth escapes and makes the tag.

James knocks Roode to the outside and punches Young down. Roode comes back in and James gets two on him off a forearm. Young goes up but Truth hits the ax kick. Roode hits his spinebuster on James for a VERY close two. Roode sets for maybe a spear but the Kru hits a Hart Attack with a side kick instead of a clothesline. James loads up the pumphandle but Johnny Devine runs in and hits James in the back with a hockey stick so the Canadians can get the titles.

Rating: C-. Not terrible here and it was ok enough for an opener. It wasn’t particularly good and I didn’t care who won by the end. That’s a running problem for this era of TNA: the matches and feuds aren’t really compelling as they’re trying desperately to keep a show on and fill in three hours. There’s some ok stuff in here though so it’s certainly not a failure or anything.

Shane Douglas talks to the Director of Authority (GM/boss) Dusty Rhodes. Dusty says this is a huge night and that the Kings of Wrestling will get what’s coming to them. The fans are talking on the internet about Cookie Gate. Yeah it’s about the tape again.

We recap the X-Division 6 man. This involves Roddy Piper and Jimmy Snuka for some reason. Apparently Kash has been saying that Jimmy’s dive off the cage meant nothing while Sonjay’s team says don’t diss the Superfly. I’ve heard far worse reasons to have a feud.

Matt Bentley/Kazarian/Kid Kash vs. Sonny Siaki/Sonjay Dutt/Hector Garza

The beard doesn’t work on Kaz at all. Sonjay and Kash start us off with some mat wrestling. Hector comes in and it’s Bentley punching him. Garza was a guy that was supposed to get a big push in TNA, even pinning Scott Hall if I remember. Siaki vs. Kaz now as things speed up. Siaki and Sonjay team up for an assisted rana to Kaz. Traci distracts Sonjay so Kaz can hit a one armed DDT to give us our face in peril.

The heels work over Sonjay, mainly focusing on the arm. They do the whole lack of tag thing to bring Bentley in to crank on the arm even more. There’s a Stunner to the arm and the heels work on Dutt’s arm even more. They tag in and out and all take some shots at it. Kash sets for a hammerlock slam but rams the arm into the buckle instead. Dutt tries to fire back with right hands but Bentley takes him down by the arm.

Dutt is pulled back to the corner and Kaz comes in again and more arm work follows. Do any of them know a match ending arm submission? Dutt is sent to the ropes and manages to hit a miracle springboard rana and it’s hot tag to Garza. Garza hits a high moonsault on Kaz and everything breaks down. Garza backdrops Dutt 360 degrees over the top to the floor. Traci’s interference backfires and Garza gets the pin on Bentley with a corkscrew moonsault.

Rating: C+. Pretty fun tag match here with more of a classic story than a spotfest. That’s very nice for a change of pace and it worked well here. Dutt did well selling the arm and Garza looked like a big deal. Then he got busted for steroids (which to be fair were legal in Mexico) and hasn’t really appeared in America since.

Savage talks to Scott Hudson (seriously?) and says nothing of note.

Coach D’Amore says Petey will keep the title.

Video on the Serengeti Survival Match, which means hardcore I think. Monty Brown beat Abyss in a Monster’s Ball Match and then got a world title shot on Impact. Abyss jumped him before the match and the injuries cost him the title. There’s a focus on thumbtacks in this.

Monty Brown vs. Abyss

Abyss is the monster heel here and Brown has bad ribs. Brown wants to start it on the ramp and here we go. You can win by pin, submission or slamming the other person into tacks. Abyss rams him into the apron to work on the back. He pulls off the tape early on and Brown is in trouble. Abyss gets a table set up quickly and the fans want fire. Greedy freaks.

The table is set up in the corner and Abyss grabs a bag. The fans still want fire. Brown comes back with a clothesline and right hands. We’re in trouble now as Brown has used up about 50% of his offense in the first three minutes. Big boot gets two for Abyss. West calls Abyss cunning and very smart. And people wonder why he’s not announcing anymore. Abyss brings in a chair and hits him in the injured ribs with it. Why don’t heels ever have injured ribs? When you turn face do you sacrifice the strength in your ribs?

The chair is placed on Brown’s ribs and Abyss hits an Earthquake onto the chair for two. The fans chant to use the table. All Abyss at this point as he pounds on the ribs. The fans continue to get on my nerves by chanting various annoying things. Abyss sets for another Earthquake but Brown moves the chair to crotch Abyss. A chair to the head puts Abyss down and Brown hits a British Bulldog powerslam onto the chair.

The Pounce is countered into the Black Hole Slam for a delayed two. That’s not a move you often see kicked out of. Abyss wedges a chair between the turnbuckles and of course is rammed into it. The Pounce hits but it knocks Abyss to the floor. The delay results in it only getting a two count. Brown tries another Pounce but Abyss ducks, sending Brown head first into the table for two. Both guys get bags of tacks and OH SWEET MERCIFUL GOODNESS BROWN RIPS ABYSS’ SHIRT OFF!!! THEY’RE JIGGLING!!! Brown hits an Alabama Slam into the tacks and I need to go see a doctor.

Rating: C+. This was a fine lesson in hardcore wrestling. Here’s the idea: if the match is about the guys and the weapons are props, the match is usually better. When the match is about the weapons and the guys are props, the match is usually worse. This was about Abyss vs. Brown and the tacks and other stuff were there too, making for a much more entertaining match.

HHH and Vince break any tape they find, including Best of D-Ray 3000.

Mike and Don run down the rest of the card.

Pat Kenney/Johnny B. Badd vs. Glen Gilbertti/Johnny Swinger

Gilbertti and Swinger are known as the New York Connection. Great: Jacqueline is the referee. Kenney is kind of famous as Simon Diamond from ECW. He and Swinger were a tag team in ECW so there’s history there. There’s no story here that I can find so we’re in filler territory. Kenney and Swinger start as the fans chant Simon Diamond. Simon (screw it) fights off both of the NYC until Gilbertti is sent outside.

Off to Badd who looks really weird with short hair. The NYC double teams Simon to take over. Badd seems content to chill on the apron. It’s not a heel move or anything. He just doesn’t seem to care. Jackie breaks up some double teaming and Swinger gets two off a clothesline. They work on Simon’s back which was injured in the match somewhere. Simon hits a sitout spinebuster on Swinger which allows the tag to Badd. Both heels get knee lfits TKO to Glenn is broken up by Swinger. Gilbertti shoves Jackie and Stuns Badd but Jackie gets involved (of course) and slams Gilbertti. TKO by Badd ends this.

Rating: D. Imagine that: Jackie messes up a match. To be fair though the match was boring, mainly because there was no real story to this. The NYC were one of the leftovers from the older run of the company so they were brought along for about five minutes. This was nothing of note though and was pretty bad. To be fair though, it was just there to bridge us to the second half of the show.

The Kings of Wrestling (who have no relation to Hero and Castagnoli if you’re curious) put Savage (we couldn’t see him) into a car and send it off, presumably making it a handicap match later.

Recap of Raven vs. DDP. Raven wants to be world champion so DDP came in and hit him with Diamond Cutters to come out of retirement. Erik Watts is in this somehow too but his black hole of caring keeps me from looking up why.

Raven vs. Diamond Dallas Page

Watts sits in on commentary. That’s fine as long as he doesn’t wrestle. Page’s music is a complete ripoff of his WCW song. Page claims Raven has been living somewhere rent free so tonight Page is collecting. Ok then. Discus lariat puts Raven down. Page baseball slides Raven to the floor and they head into the crowd. This is Raven’s Rules apparently.

Page hits him with a trashcan and we head back to ringside. We had a ref bump in there somewhere so a replacement came out. Page tries the Cutter but Raven grabs the rope. He puts on some weird helmet he brought with him and rams it into Page almost like Juggernaut. Raven has a chair brought in and then facewashes DDP in the corner. Drop toehold onto the chair gets two.

Page gets up like it’s nothing and hammers away on Raven. Another discus clothesline sets up a regular clothesline but the Cutter is countered by a low blow. Rollup gets two. Another rollup gets two and we’ve got blood. A horrible bulldog gets two for Raven. Page belly to bellies him for two. Raven superkicks him down for two. There’s no flow to this at all as it’s more of a spotfest than the X match earlier.

Diamond Cutter only gets two and we’ve got druids. DDT kills Page but it only gets two. Raven calls in the druids but Watts comes in to stop them. Both get chokeslams and the druid is revealed to be wearing khaki shorts. Watts turns on Page and clotheslines him down. Cutter to Watts, Cutter to Raven, pin.

Rating: D. Bad match for the most part because these two don’t bother selling anything. And why should they? Raven didn’t have to in ECW because he hardly ever lost and Page didn’t have to because he was over 40 in WCW. The match was really boring as a result and I don’t think anyone cares. Watts’ turn didn’t mean anything either.

Vince and HHH complain about the lack of food. Traci comes in with milk and cookies and Vince yells at her, saying bring him Dusty.

We recap the X Title match. Sabin won an Ultimate X match and has countered the Destroyer a few times to get in Petey’s head.

X-Division Title: Petey Williams vs. Chris Sabin

They trade counters to start and the fans are split. Cradle Shock is countered and Petey is freaked out. They mess up a leapfrog and Petey hits his leg on Chris’ head. Standoff as Petey is getting frustrated. Springboard dropkick sends Petey to the outside again and he almost jumps into the Cradle Shock again. They head to the floor and Petey hits a sweet slingshot rana from the ring to the floor.

Sabin one ups that and release powerbombs Williams into the barricade. Then he heads into the crowd and dives over about three rows of fans to clothesline Petey. Sweet sequence! Petey gets in a shot though and D’Amore chokes Sabin while Petey has the referee. Back inside and Petey does the O Canada bit as he stands on Sabin’s crotch.

Standing tornado DDT gets two as well. Tenay rants about D’Amore as he’s known to do. Petey hits a few suplexes for two. He’s trying to prove that he’s not a one move wonder. The fans are still split. I think the guys are a bit tired as the match has slowed down a good bit. Petey goes up so Sabin runs the corner like Angle to suplex Williams down. So much for things slowing down I guess.

They slug it out and neither guy can do much. Other than the spinning enziguri by Sabin followed by the running powerbomb for two. Sabin gets caught in the Tree of Woe but pulls up to avoid a suicide dive, then hits a BIG plancha to take Williams out. This is REALLY good. Petey flips into a Russian legsweep for two. Destroyer is countered into the Cradle Shock which is countered by Petey into a Sharpshooter!

Sabin gets the rope and they go to the corner. Chris sets for what looks like a superplex but Petey tries a sunset bomb to counter. Sabin counters that and flips Petey backwards so that Petey’s face slams into the mat. That gets rolled through after the contact into a piledriver by Sabin for a VERY close two. Sabin tries the Cradle Shock but D’Amore gets on the apron. That lets Williams get brass knuckles to hit Sabin with for the pin to retain. That ending BLOWS after the match they were having!

Rating: B+. This was AWESOME as they were countering everything and kept the pace going for at least eighty percent of the match. The ending is horrible though as they built up the match forever and then just stop it dead with a cheap ending. This got the crowd going strong for the two main events though and that’s why these guys are out there. Excellent match and if you give it a better ending it’s a classic.

A midget (Demo from Micro Championship Wrestling) beats up Vince for no apparent reason.

Recap of the Kings of Wrestling vs. Hardy/Styles/Savage. The Kings say they’re taking over and that’s about it. The other three guys say they’re fighting for TNA.

Jeff Hardy/AJ Styles/Randy Savage vs. Kings of Wrestling

Savage was kidnapped remember. The Kings come out to Elvis impersonator music and Elvis suits. AJ looks like he’s about 19 here. Jarrett is world champion. Hall looks almost human. AJ and Jarrett start us off. Bah I can’t say Jeff in this. AJ and the champ see who can get the bigger reactions from the crowd then do some technical stuff. A headscissors takes Jarrett down and a dropkick takes him down again.

Off to Hall. He and Nash are wrestling in those Elvis suits. Give me a break. Hall works on the arm so AJ takes the knees out to control. He wants Nash so Hall spits at him and makes the tag. AJ uses the speed again and dropkicks all three Kings down. Hardy is tagged in and dropkicks Hall and Jarrett down as things speed up. Slingshot dropkick by Hardy has Nash in trouble.

Nash gets in a big boot and Hardy is in trouble. Here’s the champ who beat Hardy last month at Victory Road. I always thought that was two or three months before this show. Jarrett hot shots him on the top rope and it’s time to strut. Back to Hall for a discus punch and chokeslam for two. Nash comes in for a sideslam which gets two also. Back to Hall who hooks the abdominal stretch. Nothing but trademark stuff from the Outsiders.

Hall hooks a modified STF but pulls on the hair instead of the neck. That has to hurt. Hardy gets his mule kick (catching Hall squarely in the hand) which is enough for the tag to AJ. Things speed up again and AJ cleans house. Moonsault into the reverse DDT gets two. Styles Clash to Jarrett is avoided and Nash breaks up the springboard forearm. Fallaway slam for two as we’re just waiting on Savage to make the big miracle appearance.

Nash hits the framed elbow (complete with Karate Elvis Action!) for two. Back to Jarrett and they work over the ribs which the Outsiders started on. Naturally this leads to the Figure Four LEG Lock but AJ rolls him up for two. Hall breaks up the tag and Nash hooks a bearhug. See, THAT makes sense. AJ makes the unseen tag and it’s back to Jarrett. They slug it out and both hit cross bodies to put them down.

AJ finally makes the tag to Hardy and house is cleaned. Stroke is countered into a Twist of Stunner and AJ adds a springboard cross body to Hall. Nash takes out the referee though as the numbers are catching up with them. Hardy goes up for the Swanton but Hall hits him with the guitar. Hardy falls forward onto Jarrett for the Swanton anyway but there’s no referee. Here’s Savage with a big old bald spot as is his custom. Naturally with everyone down he wants a tag and fires off right hands. All three of the Kings get caught in sleepers for some reason. Jarrett tries a sunset flip but Savage falls on him for the pin.

Rating: C-. The match was ok but the ending was HORRIBLE (again). Savage might have been out there 90 seconds. He would be gone the next day because he proposed a one month title reign for himself and said he’d drop it back to Jarrett the next month but it was vetoed. That’s his last match, which is a sad note to go out on.

Vince is loaded into an ambulance as HHH doesn’t know what to do without him.

Video on Final Resolution. I remember this video actually.

Here’s the tape that has been talked about all night. Shane Douglash, Traci (with cookies) and Abyss (with balloons) go to see…a bunch of blurry objects. Roadie and Ron Killings are there too. They steal some catering and the only body I recognize is I think Eddie Guerrero. Seriously you can’t see ANYTHING and they don’t say any names. These could be TNA dudes for all we know. That was it? Seriously? WE SPENT TWO AND A HALF HOURS BUILDING TO THAT??? Ok to be fair this was when TNA was nothing so it’s a bigger deal I guess. Rey was there too apparently but you couldn’t see him at all.

We recap XXX vs. AMW. This was the big tag feud in TNA as they’ve fought dozens of times but there hasn’t been a distinct winner to the whole thing. They’ve had cage matches before but they were in the four sided cage. AMW hit an awesome Death Sentence from the top of the cage to win that one. Now they’re having another cage match and the losing team has to split up forever.

America’s Most Wanted vs. Triple X

This is one of the things that TNA did that was indeed different: sometimes something other than the heavyweight title feud ended the show, which is definitely a good idea here. The six man was just ok but this was a great match. This is in a cage remember. AMW brings in handcuffs. That’s a signature thing for them and they’ll come into play later so remember that.

They have to tag here but I’ll give that ten minutes tops. Daniels and Storm start us off. Is there a significance to the tape that Daniels puts on his left shoulder that I’ve never gotten? I’ve always wondered that. Off to Daniels who kicks Storm in the back to take control. It breaks down quickly and AMW double teams Daniels. Off to Harris as Daniels is already busted open.

Skipper (XXX is Daniels/Elix Skipper if you weren’t sure on that one) gets his team the advantage and gives it back over to Daniels. He’s GUSHING already. Harris takes Skipper down and it’s back to Storm. Powerslam puts Daniels down. They load up the Death Sentence on Skipper but Daniels makes the save. Skipper pulls a towel back and handcuffs Harris to the post. West: “Oh what a dirty trick!” Yes, handcuffing your mortal enemy to a cage and making him defenseless is the same sort of thing you would hear on The Brady Bunch Don. Well called.

XXX double teams Storm and Daniels taunts Harris with the key. They drive the key into the head of Storm and hit a double team powerbomb/elbow combination for two. We get some heel miscommunication and Storm spears Daniels. There’s the key and Harris in free. That’s a nice twist on the hot tag because it’s basically the same thing. Harris cleans house and Storm is back up too.

I think everyone but Harris is bleeding. Triple X gets rammed into the cage multiple times but Skipper grabs a belly to belly to Harris. A suplex/cross body combo gets two. Hart Attack gets two on Skipper. Daniels hits a quick Downward Spiral to Storm and Harris goes into the steel. Harris is busted too. Death Sentence (AMW’s finisher) gets two on Harris who kicks out.

Skipper goes to the top of the cage (I don’t think you can win by escape) to Harris POWERBOMBS HIM OFF THE CAGE for two. FOR TWO. Angel’s Wings gets two for Daniels. Daniels goes up but Harris follows him. Now it’s time for the highlight reel moment to end all highlight reel moments in TNA. Skipper is sitting on another corner than Harris and TIGHTROPE WALKS THE EDGE OF THE CAGE AND HURRICANRANAS HARRIS TO THE MAT!!! WOW!

Daniels IMMEDIATELY drops an elbow off the top of the cage BUT IT GETS TWO. Daniels goes back up as we watch replays for a four man Tower of Doom. Daniels overrotates and lands on his face. Harris powerbombed Skipper who electric chaired Storm who suplexed Daniels. Everyone is pretty much dead but Skipper and Harris counter each others’ finishers. Everyone knocks everyone else down and Harris handcuffs Daniels to the cage in a nice play off what happened to him earlier. Last Call to Skipper and AMW pins him with XXX’s PowerPlex to split up XXX.

Rating: A+. What else did you expect me to give this? This match holds up incredibly well with the few moments from the cage walk to the Tower of Doom being as breathtaking as you’ll ever see. Absolutely awesome match and if you’re a fan of bloodbath cage matches that leave your jaw hanging open, find this right now because it’s excellent.

Overall Rating: B. There’s some bad stuff on here, but considering this is their second three hour PPV ever, this was incredible. Things slowed down a bit after this when it became about DDP and Nash and Jarrett, but they would pick it right back up with Lockdown in a few months. Very good show although it’s kind of hard to find. Check out the main event for sure though.

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Impact Wrestling
Date: February 16, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Tazz, Mike Tenay

We’re back in Orlando which means the crowds have gotten a lot worse again. Roode is still the champion after Sting had to count the pin on Sunday in a redo of Summerslam 1997. And before anyone complains, no I’m not saying that’s a bad thing. 14 years is more than enough for an angle to be repeated. Anyway, we start towards Victory Road tonight. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap video of the two main events from the PPV. The other is Garrett vs. Gunner if you’re confused.

Here’s Roode to open the show. He says that the fans are chanting Rooooooooooode so loudly that he needs to hear his introduction again. Roode talks about overcoming everyone, including Jeff Hardy. As for Sting, Sting has been pointing his finger at Roode since Roode won the title. After Sunday, that finger should be pointed at Sting because it was him that counted the pin to keep the belt on Bobby.

Cue Sting who says it was Sting that was selfish on Sunday because he let his anger get the better of him. If hurt the outcome of the match and Jeff got screwed. He’s here tonight to make things right with Hardy. He’s glad Roode is a fighting champion because tonight, it’s Roode vs. Hardy. There’s no time limit and no DQ. Oh and it starts NEXT.

Brandon Jacobs of the New York Giants is here.

TNA World Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Bobby Roode

Jeff charges and attacks Roode before the introductions can be made. Roode catches him in Percy Watson’s Persecution for two. Roode is sent to the floor where Jeff hits a dive and a pair of chair shots. This isn’t falls count anywhere. Roode is rammed into various metal objects and has his suplex countered into one by Hardy. It’s been about 95% Jeff so far. They go towards the ramp and Hardy cracks him in the back with a chair. Hardy whips him into the apron twice and signals to the fans for something. Roode uses the distraction to get in a punch to the ribs.

Jeff counters a whip to send Roode’s knees into the steps. He uses said steps to make a platform and hits Poetry in Motion onto the champ against the railing. With both guys down we take a break. Back with Hardy getting two off his front suplex. He loads up the Whisper in the Wind but Roode shoves the referee into the ropes to crotch him. Roode takes it to the floor again and tries a piledriver on the ramp but Jeff counters with a backdrop.

They go up to the stage with Hardy in control again. Hardy throws Roode off the stage but it wasn’t a huge crash as Roode is up pretty quickly. Also the stage isn’t as high. Jeff dives off the ramp with a clothesline. Twist of Fate is countered as Roode shoves Jeff into the stage. Roode’s charge misses and both guys are down.

This is random but they’re near the announce desk so it popped into my head. Tazz isn’t live in the arena and is doing this on a voiceover due to the death in his family. Hardy takes him back to the ring and takes his shirt off. Out of nowhere comes Kurt Angle who whips him into the steps. Roode pops up and hits the spear (of course) for the pin at 16:45.

Rating: C+. Far more of a fight than a match but that’s ok. The match was entertaining enough and it sets up something new for Hardy. He’s been around the title picture enough and hopefully this means they’ll be going towards Storm vs. Roode now. Good match here as Hardy looked great and his stuff with Angle should rock.

Roode says he won when Sting comes in. Sting says he cheated the system and says he’s not done yet. Roode is going to defend against the winner of the #1 contenders match tonight.

Eric Young has a guitar and says that he’ll get ODB back tonight. He also talks about shoot fighting and having his driver’s license taken away.

Sting talks to two people about getting a shot at Roode. He asks if they’re in and the people are revealed as Ray and Storm. They both say they should be world champion and the match is on.

We get a video of the Sorensen injury from Sunday. The current word is that Sorensen will be out for a year at least. He is however moving his arms and I believe legs as well.

Zema Ion/Austin Aries vs. Alex Shelley/Shannon Moore

Aries and Moore start things off. Aries takes him down with a fast headlock takedown and then a dropkick. Ion tags himself in to tick the champ off. Shannon kicks everyone down and Aries is knocked to the floor. There’s a baseball slide and Asai Moonsault which kind of misses as Moore lands on his feet and Aries falls a few seconds later.

Shannon picks up Ion’s hairspray which gets him a dropkick to the back. Shelley knocks Ion to the floor and wants a tag. Here’s Alex who misses a double boot and has Sliced Bread broken up. Aries dropkicks him in the back of the head and loads up the brainbuster but Ion tags himself in. Shelley escapes the brainbuster but falls into a rollup by Ion at 4:10.

Rating: C. The match was fine and I honestly forgot that Ion was #1 contender. That’s probably due to how the match he got the spot ended which is understandable. Also it’s rare to have heel vs. heel http://onhealthy.net/product-category/anti-anxiety/ feuds. Not a bad match or anything and the ending worked pretty well I thought.

Speaking of heel vs. heel, Gail and Madison are coming to the ring and Madison wants to chill things out between then.

Battle Royal

Brooke Tessmacher, Tara, Sarita, Rosita, Winter, Angelina Love, ODB, Mickie James, Velvet Sky, Madison Rayne

Winner gets the shot at Gail at Victory Road. Before the match, Madison praises Gail for giving everyone a chance to win right now. Madison sits at ringside with Gail. Winter and Tessmacther are out quickly. ODB threw both of them out and she tosses Rosita onto them. Mickie goes after her and has some better luck. She tries a headscissors but three other girls knock them both to the apron.

Mickie goes up top and ODB knocks her out. Everyone rams into ODB to knocker her to the floor and we’re down to Tara, Velvet, Angelina, Sarita and Madison who is on the floor. Tara is knocked out by Sarita. Angelina and Sarita team up against Velvet who fights out as well as she can. Velvet fights both of them as well as she can but can’t put Sarita out.

The alliance seems to break down but they hit a double elbow to put Velvet down. Madison hasn’t been in the ring yet so she’s still in this. Botox Injection puts Velvet down and Sarita says now put her out. Angelina goes to do that and Sarita tosses her. Salsa dancing abounds. Sarita charges at her but Velvet ducks to put her out. Madison runs in to throw out Velvet for the win at 6:30.

Rating: D. So apparently Madison was a surprise entrant into this match because when she said Gail was giving anyone in the ring a shot, it entered her into the match. Still though, this was longer than it should be or at least too long with those final three in there. Can’t call it a failure due to the hotness involved though.

Storm is all fired up.

The new tag champs say they proved their greatness by doing what they said they’d do. It’s a rematch next week.

We recap the Garrett vs. Gunner match from the PPV where Garrett fought hard but lost.

Here’s Immortal, who is now Flair, Gunner, Bischoff, and Chelsea if you remember her. She’s hot if nothing else. Eric says Chelsea wanted back in after seeing Garrett’s loss on Sunday. Champagne is brought in along with cigars. Eric says get a dog as a dog catcher, but never come close to wrestling again. He wishes Garrett the best in all of his future endeavors.

The host of some MMA show talks about MMA.

Eric Young talks to ODB who doesn’t want to hear it. He plays a song on his guitar called the Ode To ODB. She laughs at it and spanks him. This isn’t funny, as usual.

James Storm vs. Bully Ray

It’s 10:30 so there’s either something after this or we’re going to have a long match. Ray is way too proud of his calves. Feeling out process to start and Storm armdrags him down. Hebnar trips over him and Ray works on Storm’s knee. Ray even takes the boot off of Storm’s foot to work it over even better. More leg work follows which has been the focus of the match so far. Ray keeps on the leg as we take a break.

Back with Storm trying a comeback but Ray dropkicks the knee out for two. Ray punches the knee and talks trash, which gets him a punch in the face. Codebreaker puts Ray in the corner. He comes out with a big boot but Storm ducks underneath and hits the Last Call for the pin and the #1 contendership at 12:10.

Rating: C. Not the worst match in the world but it wasn’t that interesting either. It gives us Roode vs. Storm which is what we needed more than anything else though. Storm has made the superkick into a big move that can change a match at anytime which is what it needed to be.

Storm has a beer bash post match and gives Brandon Jacobs a beer as well. Ray jumps Storm during the celebration and gets in Jacobs’ face. He takes a drink from the beer and spits it in Jacobs’ face. Jacobs shoves him down and wants to fight. Storm and security pull him back and D’Lo Brown looks like he’s trying to hold back a small bus. Jacobs and Storm get in the ring and celebrate.

Storm and Jacobs say bring it Bully. Jacobs will be back next week.

Sting wants to talk to Roode face to face. Roode comes out and announces Roode vs. Storm in the cage at Lockdown. Roode kicks Sting in the balls for that. He takes Sting’s sunglasses and hits him with the belt to open him up. So….Sting vs. Roode at Victory Road?

Overall Rating: B-. This was a very packed show but nothing came off as excellent. Storm vs. Roode is the match that needs to happen but it’s a very good thing to get Sting vs. Roode out of the way first. That’s been the real main event feud since Roode won the title so getting it out of the way lets Roode vs. Storm feel like the huge match that it is. It wasn’t announced but I’d call it a very safe bet after the ending to that show. Good show but not great.

Results
Bobby Roode b. Jeff Hardy – Spear
Zema Ion/Austin Aries b. Alex Shelley/Shannon Moore – Rollup to Shelley
Madison Rayne won a battle royal last eliminating Velvet Sky
James Storm b. Bully Ray – Last Call

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Monday Night Raw
Date: August 21, 2006
Location: Webster Bank Arena, Bridgeport, Connecticut
Attendance: 5,700
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Another night, another requested show, another with no idea why it’s on this list. Anyway, this is Raw from 2006, meaning Edge is champion….I think. The main event is Flair vs. Orton, in a match that is probably nowhere near as good as it was supposed to be but they didn’t have anyone else to put out there other than Flair since the world champion is in the middle of the card. Let’s get to it.

This is the night after Summerslam where Hogan beat Orton.

Here’s Edge to open the show without the belt. He talks about how he’s been waiting for this night for his entire life. Everyone bought tickets to see Cena here as the new champion but they were ALL WRONG! Hey you, the kid in the front row. YOU WERE WRONG! If he’s champion, where’s his title? And where’s his girlfriend? Lita (with a top cut down to her navel) pops up on the screen with the WWE Title near a harbor. Lita throws it into the water.

Edge says that this is the beginning of a new era. Smoke comes down from the ceiling and when it’s gone, there’s a new title hanging on a hook. It’s a new spinner belt with a Rated R logo on it. Edge says if there’s anyone in the back that wants a shot at the title, bring it on. Cue the returning Jeff Hardy, back on Raw for the first time in about four years. So that’s why this was requested. Edge runs his mouth about Matt so Jeff takes him down and loads up the Swanton but Edge runs.

Ad for the McMahon DVD. That’s one of the funniest DVDs you’ll ever see.

Eugene/Jim Duggan/Highlanders vs. Spirit Squad

This would be the Squad minus Mitch. Eugene and I think Johnny start things off. Mitch is the one on the floor. Got it. Johnny kicks Eugene in the ribs in a battle of OVW legends. There’s an airplane spin from Eugene and here’s Robbie. The Spirit Squad are using a Freebird Rule on steroids to be five man tag team champions. Off to Kenny, the leader of the team who gets two off a clothesline.

Mikey in now with some crossface shots. Mitch and Nick (Dolph Ziggler) cheer Mikey on, meaning they’re playing the gimmick perfectly. Robbie fights off everyone in the corner for a few seconds but there are too many cheerleaders. The fans want Hacksaw. Here’s Nicky and he represents Exhibit A as to never say never about someone. Back to Kenny, the star of the team and the guy that hasn’t been seen in years.

This match is probably getting more time than it needs, especially when we’re waiting on Hacksaw to get the hot tag and destroy everything in sight. Kenny misses his nearly perfect guillotine legdrop and there’s the tag to Rory, meaning the fans don’t care all that much. He hits what we would call the Irish Curse and everything breaks down. Duggan gets a big reaction. The Highlanders get Nick alone and hit the Scot Drop (double team reverse slingshot suplex) for the pin.

Rating: D+. The time hurt it here and Duggan not being in officially killed the crowd. The Highlanders were funny for a little while (and by that I mean for their vignettes) and then they became any other tag team. They never won the titles and then Robbie showed up at Impact in the crowd and got a huge fine or something like that.

Edge wants to find Vince but gets Coach (and an endorsement for the McMahon DVD). Edge vs. Jeff non-title is made for later. The champ leaves just as Vince gets here and he throws Coach out. The McMahons (Shane is with him) say that the illegal man was pinned last night so this isn’t over with DX.

Orton says he had Hogan beaten and Hogan getting his foot on the rope shouldn’t mean anything. Flair is a bigger legend than Hogan too. Carlito pops up and says seeing Hogan win last night was cool. Randy: “At least I was on Summerslam.” Orton yells some more and leaves.

HHH is reading a magazine and then talks to the camera a bit. Last night the McMahons tried everything to beat DX (including male cheerleaders, a leprechaun, a chubby giant, and a cannibal) but DX overcame and won. They were on the way to Bridgeport when they saw Vince’s private plane. Shawn pops up with an overly dramatic plane crash sequence using a toy plane. HHH says they found the private hanger where Vince keeps his 30 million dollar plane and there was a little incident. Shawn scratched the paint but HHH says he doesn’t think Vince will notice. The camera pans over to a giant DX painted on the side.

Vince is very mad and grunts. He shoves the TV he was watching and I think he starts to cry.

Victoria vs. Trish Stratus

They slug it out to start and Trish hits a splash in the corner followed by a dropkick. Trish knocks her to the floor and hits the Thesz Press to the floor. Clothesline gets two back in the ring. Victory roll gets the same and you know Lawler was happy with that. Stratusfaction is countered into a backbreaker and Victoria works on the back a bit. They go to the corner and Trish hits a middle rope hurricanrana but Victoria pops up and tries the Widow’s Peak. Trish escapes and Stratusfaction ends this clean.

Rating: C+. This was FAR better than any Divas match that we’ve had in years. It’s only about three minutes long and they did more good looking stuff than the modern batch of Divas have done in I don’t know how long. Trish was gorgeous but she could also have some great matches. Victoria is no slouch either.

The McMahons come out immediately after the match ends and Vince is mad. He yells at the fans for encouraging DX for their degeneracy. Ok see, there’s a difference between being a jerk and vandalism. Thankfully Vince knows this and has called the cops to have DX arrested. With that, we go to a break.

We come back and the McMahons are still here so let’s go to the airport where the cops are waiting. Instead we cut to DX who aren’t at the airport. So they’re fugitives now. They’re on top of the WWE headquarters and talk about how everyone has left their marks on places they’ve discovered or reached first. HHH talks about the Germans bombing Pearl Harbor but Vince stops him before he gets on a roll. The camera pans way out and there’s a huge DX painted on the side of the building. Vince looks like he’s going to be sick. He starts crying and walks to the back very slowly.

On this day seven years ago, Smackdown debuted.

After a break it’s STILL on the McMahons with Foley popping up. He asks Vince how he’s doing and says he’s not having such a great night himself. Vince says he doesn’t like Foley and to stop calling him Vince. Tonight, since DX isn’t here, Foley can join Vince’s exclusive club. If Foley doesn’t do it, someone gets fired.

Edge vs. Jeff Hardy

Non-title and clearly this needs to be in the middle of the show instead of in the main event spot right? The version of the video I have speeds up a lot here which makes JR sound like William Shattner as Captain Kirk. Jeff starts with a baseball slide and the fight starts on the floor. Edge takes over by sending him into the steps and gets two in the ring. He bends Jeff around the post to work on the back.

Jeff sends him into the buckle and goes up but Edge moves. DDT gets two. Edge hits a quick Edge-O-Matic to take over and get two at the same time. Whisper in the Wind out of nowhere gets two also. Twist of Fate sets up the Swanton and Edge is in big trouble. Lita has to make the save…and here’s Cena for the DQ.

Rating: C+. These two know each other so well that it’s almost impossible for them to have a bad match together. Jeff was being put back into things carefully because he hadn’t been around the WWE style for a long time. He would get into the IC Title picture very soon and would get the title in a few months/weeks.

Cena knocks Edge into the back and they fight to a break. Back and the fight continues. Edge is knocked into various objects but he manages to get in a right hand. Cena throws Edge into the water where Lita threw the belt earlier.

Foley is in the back when Melina comes up to encourage him.

Intercontinental Title: Kane vs. Johnny Nitro

Kane beat Shelton to get this shot. Nitro runs as much as he can and gets in a few shots here and there. Melina won’t stop screaming. Kane hammers him down and hits the top rope clothesline and Umaga runs in for the DQ.

Umaga beats Kane down and hits a bunch of Samoan Spikes on him.

Layla won the Divas Search.

Marine trailer debuts.

Randy Orton vs. Ric Flair

Flair is covered in bandages and has a black eye after the I Quit match with Foley last night. All Orton to start as he beats Flair into the ground with basic offense. Back to the floor and Flair is sent into the steps. Orton stomps around Flair’s body and the RKO finishes this clean. Total squash.

Orton beats on him even more post match until the decision is reversed. Carlito makes the save.

Here’s Foley for the Vince kissing segment club. Foley says he won’t do it because he doesn’t need this job. “I’ve saved a bunch of money over the years on apparel and haircuts.” Vince says if he doesn’t do it, Melina is fired. She says don’t do it but Foley says Melina will be a big star (really?) so he’ll get it over with. In a funny moment, Foley freaks out on Vince and demands he take his pants down.

Foley does it and Melina hits him low. Vince fires Foley. The McMahons and Melina leave and Vince talks trash. He and Shane get outside and Vince says he thinks DX has broken him. Vince gets in his limo, drives away…..and there’s a chain attached to the axle which rips it and the wheels off. DX is painted on the side of it and Vince starts to cry.

Overall Rating: D. This show sums up most of the problems of this era: the whole summer was about Vince and eventually Shane vs. DX, and it wasn’t funny. DX never really broke a sweat against them because at the end of the day, it’s Shawn Michaels and HHH vs. 5 cheerleader jobbers and the McMahons. The stuff to “break” Vince isn’t funny in the slightest and the whole thing was a mess. Also, why in the world was the return of a big name fighting probably his biggest rival who is world champion on in the middle of the show? To see Flair for 2 minutes? Really? Bad show.

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Against All Odds 2012
Date: February 12, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Jeremy Borash

We’re back stateside again and I’m genuinely excited for the main event. With Russo officially out of creative now, things are looking up in TNA and it only took them ten years to get this far. The main event is Roode defending against Ray, Hardy and Storm in a four way which could actually go to any of them. That’s not something I’m used to in multi-man matches as you can almost always write off someone. Let’s get to it.

Hardy arrives to open the show.

We get a video of Hogan talking about how awesome TNA is. It’s followed by a video about the fourway.

Borash is in Tazz’s place. I can’t complain there.

Zema Ion vs. Jesse Sorensen

This is a #1 contenders match for the X-Title. Tazz has had a death in his family apparently. I’m sorry to hear that. Ion walks into a northern lights suplex and gets clotheslined outside. Sorensen ranas him to the floor to start and Ion steals the football that Jesse gave a fan. What a villain! Sorensen misses a baseball slide and Ion puts the football by the steps. Back in and a missile dropkick puts Jesse down.

Ion fires off a moonsault to the floor and his knees hit Sorensen right in the head. That gets a nine count but Ion breaks up the count for no apparent reason. The referee throws up an X and the match is over at 3:36. I’m not going to rate it because they only just got going when the injury occurred and I don’t think it’s fair to grade part of the opening to a match. It was ok though.

There’s a different ring announcer here also.

Christy is in the back with Roode who says that he always get things done and is still the champion. Hardy has had a bunch of chances but has always failed. Roode has beaten Storm time after time. He doesn’t get what Ray’s problem is. Roode can’t wait to laugh at Sting after he wins.

Here’s Robbie E who issued an open challenge earlier today. He has Big Rob with him and talks about the challenge. Anyone that wants a shot (not mentioned if the title is on the line or not) can come get it.

TV Title: Robbie E vs. Shannon Moore

…..REALLY? They have all these people on their roster that can’t get on TV at all and they pick Shannon Moore? Well at least it’s not Eric Young. Shannon armdrags Robbie around and Rob tries to take a walk. Robbie uses his usual basic offense as Moore tries to speed things up. JB talks about going clubbing with Robbie in Topeka, Kansas. Robbie knocks him through the ropes and into the barricade to take over. Back inside we hit the chinlock which is quickly broken.

Shannon keeps trying to go up but Robbie stays on him. Moore makes his comeback and a bulldog gets two. Out to the floor and an Asai Moonsault puts the champion down. Back in and I think Moore spits at Big Rob. Moonsault press misses and a clothesline gets two for the champ. Robbie goes up but gets crotched and a top rope rana gets a near fall. O’Connor Roll gets two but Robbie kicks out, sending Shannon into a right hand from Big Rob. An inverted DDT keeps the title on Robbie at 9:25.

Rating: C. This got a lot better as things sped up, but I could pop in a Best of Robbie E DVD if I ever need help sleeping. He’s so boring on offense and I have no idea why this was given ten minutes. I’d assume it has something to do with the time being short, but if not then they need help. This did improve as it went along though.

We recap the Knockouts Title feud. Tara won a triple threat and that’s about it.

Knockouts Title: Gail Kim vs. Tara

Tara takes over quickly to start with some snapmares by the hair. Gail gets sent to the apron but she pulls Tara down by the hair to take over. Big boot gets two. Gail hits a missile dropkick and Madison walks out on her. They’ve been having problems lately. Kim works on the knee which has been bothering Tara lately according to JB. There’s an Octopus Hold by Gail but Tara stumbles into the ropes.

Top rope rana puts Tara down but Gail doesn’t cover. That allows Tara to snap off a powerslam and both girls are down. Gail gets up first and tries another top rope rana but Tara backdrops her off and a moonsault off the top hits Gail. The landing hurt Tara’s knee again though. She loads up Widow’s Peak anyway but the knee gives out and Gail hits a knee crusher and Eat Defeat for the pin at approximately 7:00.

Rating: C. This was a decent match with a story being told in the knee injury of Tara. That’s far better than what I’m used to in women’s wrestling anymore so I’ll give this the benefit of the doubt. Also it had an Octopus Hold in it and that makes any match instantly better.

James Storm says he’s ready for Roode and it’ll be a big party when he wins the title.

Recap of the tag title match. Crimson/Morgan beat Magnus/Joe after the latter won the Wild Card tournament. The challengers won a kind of handicap match in England and then got beaten up in England, meaning the only time they’ve had success against the champions is in a two on one situation.

Tag Titles: Magnus/Samoa Joe vs. Crimson/Matt Morgan

Morgan and Joe start things off. Morgan shrugs off some shoulders to start and hits a shoulder of his own for two. Off to Crimson and Magnus with the power guy taking over. Back to Morgan and the champs double team a bit. Suplex gets two for Morgan and it’s Red Boy again. Magnus hits a clothesline to bring Joe back in as the challengers take over. A big boot to the shoulder by Magnus sets up a Joe backsplash for two.

There’s a chinlock by Magnus to Crimson as things slow down and we enter into a traditional formula. Crimson misses a right hand and Magnus suplexes him for two. Back to Joe who peppers Crimson in the corner with right hands. A big boot out of desperation put Joe down and there’s the double tag to give us Morgan vs. Magnus. The big man cleans house with knee lifts and a double clothesline.

He charges into a Magnus boot though, but it doesn’t seem to matter as a spinning slam into a Rock Bottom (I think Chris Harris called it the Catatonic) gets two. Magnus and Joe can’t hit their double team finisher but Crimson accidentally spears Morgan. Crimson is sent to the outside and the snapmare and elbow combination gives us new champions at 10:00.

Rating: C+. Pretty good tag match here and I’ll overlook the questionable booking for the sake of giving me something to like on this show. Nothing has been bad but this first hour has come and gone with nothing significantly above average at all. Joe getting a title is a nice sight though.

Bully Ray tells the feeble woman called Christy to go home. He has the number of all three guys and is in the best shape of his career.

X-Division Title: Austin Aries vs. Alex Shelley

Feeling out process to start as things begin quickly. Shelley pounds away with chops and strikes. The fans are split here as Shelley’s Sliced Bread attempt is countered with a shove. A clothesline puts Aries outside and he hides under the ring. He comes out from the other side and shoves Alex to the floor so he can hit the suicide dive. Back in now and the champ is in control.

Aries works on the shoulder of Alex. A kick to the shoulder gets two and we go to a neck crank. Pendulum Elbow misses and Shelley comes back with a clothesline. Sliced Bread is blocked again but Aries is rammed head first into the buckle. Aries heads to the floor to hide under the ring again but as he comes out, Shelley is waiting on him with a suicide dive. Back in Finlay’s Celtic Cross hits for two for the challenger.

Aries takes out the knee and hits the Pendulum Elbow. Not playing to the crowd and wasting time makes your offense more efficient. Who knew? He loads up the Brainbuster but Alex knees his way out of it. They fight to the apron and a Death Valley Driver to the apron nearly kills Shelley. That and a double ax from the apron gets two. 450 misses and Shelley hits Sliced Bread #2 for a VERY close two.

Aries fires off a bunch of knees to the face and hits the Brainbuster for another close two. Shelley fires off some kicks but can’t hit Sliced Bread again. The fans think this is awesome and I can’t really argue with them. Aries counters and hits another Brainbuster which sets up the Last Chancery to finally gets him the win via tap out at 15:11.

Rating: B. This is what the opener should have been a shorter version of. Having this match in the middle of the card is a good idea because the crowd was getting bored and needed something to fire them up. When all else fails, have two small guys go out there and fly everywhere with near falls. It’s tried and true and almost always works.

Hardy says his back is still hurt but he’ll be fine. Creatures, mount up.

We recap AJ vs. Kaz and the Daniels factor in a video that I think was used on Impact.

AJ Styles vs. Kazarian

Kaz is in a shirt which he tries to remove but Daniels says no. AJ controls with a headlock and rips the shirt off himself. They fight over the arm as the fans are all over Daniels. Kaz gets sent to the floor and AJ is in control. Backbreaker puts Kaz down as Styles is working on the back. A flying forearm puts Kaz on the floor for a minute but AJ gets it back inside to avoid Daniels.

A bridging Indian Deathlock with a facelock cranks on Kaz’s back even more. Kaz comes back and slams AJ down so that the spinning springboard legdrop (Wave of the Future maybe?) can get two. Spinwheel kick gets two. Now Kaz works on AJ’s back with a hard whip in and a jumping Russian Legsweep for two. Leg lariat gets the same. Kazarian hooks a double chicken wing on the mat but AJ fights up to his feet.

They slug it out and AJ takes over with a pair of clotheslines and an enziguri. Styles sets for an atomic drop but slams Kaz face first instead, getting two. Styles Clash and Fade to Black are both countered and Kaz hits a dropkick to regain control. AJ grabs a jawbreaker but can’t hit the Clash. Kaz kicks him to the apron and hits a slingshot DDT onto said apron as we hit the floor. Slingshot cutter gets two back in. This is getting good.

AJ is sat up on the top and Kaz hits a running superkick to almost send him to the floor. Kaz goes up for the Flux Capacitor (C4) but AJ knocks him down with a headbutt. Moonsault into the reverse DDT gets a very close two. AJ tries a suplex into a neckbreaker but Kaz reverses into a hard Downward Spiral to put everyone down. They go into a pinfall reversal sequence which gets two for both guys and ends with a Pele to put Kaz down. AJ is sent to the apron and loads up a springboard forearm but instead hits a gorgeous Asai Moonsault to take out Daniels. He tries to springboard at Kaz but jumps into Fade To Black for the pin at 18:37.

Rating: B. Can’t argue with this one either. AJ is always awesome to see when he has time and the ability to be himself. Kaz can do great stuff too, but I could do without Daniels ever being near AJ Styles again. At the end of the day, AJ is going to win the feud with him again, just as he has every time they’ve feuded.

Gunner and Bischoff are in the back and they have a towel for Hogan to throw in to save Garrett.

We recap Garrett vs. Gunner. Gunner was a killer for awhile until Garrett Bischoff beat him with the Nepotism Driver. Garrett got DDTed on the floor but came back with a new trainer: Hulk Hogan. Tonight it’s basically Hogan vs. Eric with Gunner and Garrett as their surrogates.

Gunner vs. Garrett Bischoff

Garrett comes out to Hulk’s music. Garrett controls to start with his usual stuff. He’s in the workout pants still. Gunner takes over for a few moments until Garrett hooks a backslide and front facelock. At this point he has less of a moveset than Andy from Tough Enough. Gunner pulls him into the middle buckle and takes over again.

The beating goes on for several minutes and there’s nothing to say. It’s a guy with experience and some ring skills beating on a guy who knows a total of about 5 moves. This is getting ten minutes on PPV in the second to last match on the card, making it longer than the tag team title match. Gunner works over the neck for the most part.

Eric gets in Garrett’s face so Hogan decks him. Gunner hits probably his fourth neckbreaker but on the next attempt Garrett grabs the rope. Hogan picks up the towel but Garrett says no. And then Gunner DDTs him for the pin at 11:57. Yes, it actually got that much time. Why does this surprise me?

Rating: F. There is no justification for this match to get this much time on a PPV. None. I can’t stand this story because it’s not about Garrett or Gunner. It’s about Hogan, just like it always is. Hogan isn’t putting anyone over, because that would make him look weak and Impact Wrestling is all about him and Bischoff. I know I sound like some whiny fan boy here but this has been old since it started and it’s just going to keep going. How many people can’t get time on a PPV so that Eric’s son can be out there and bore everyone to death?

Sting, in blue and white facepaint, says he’s the enforcer so that everyone is on their best behavior. It’s SHOWTIME!

Video on the main event. The idea is that Roode will do whatever it takes to keep the title and tonight he’s up against huge odds. Everyone talks about how much winning means to them.

TNA World Title: Bobby Roode vs. James Storm vs. Jeff Hardy vs. Bully Ray

Sting is the guest enforcer. This is the match I’ve really wanted to see and I don’t think there’s a wrong answer for a winner here. The match will be judged on how well it goes to get to the ending, which is a very rare situation. There’s a ton of time here too. Even after spending ten minutes on the intros, we have almost half an hour if needed. Ray cuts off Christy and does his own intro. Somehow he’s lost an inch from when he talked about himself earlier in the night. Hardy gets a CRAZY pop. I’m pretty sure this is one fall to a finish.

Roode wants to work with Ray but Ray just glares at him. Yeah it’s one fall. Roode keeps pitching his tag team idea but Ray walks to the floor and folds his arms. Hardy and Storm team up and play ping pong with Roode’s jaw. Sitout front suplex by Hardy sets up a neckbreaker by Storm for no cover. They invite Ray into the ring but he’s cool to chill on the floor. We get word that Sorensen has a neck injury and will undergo further tests.

Storm tries to steal a pin on Hardy but only gets two. Beer Money reunites for a bit for a double suplex on Hardy but there’s no union there. Ray comes in and beats on Hardy as Roode and Storm are on the floor. The fans chant D-Von’s Better at Ray. Superplex gets two on Hardy. Storm rams Roode into the steps but Ray kicks James through the ropes. Ray talks to Roode, saying he wants a spike piledriver. Hardy counters though and Storm is back in.

Hardy and Storm try a double superplex but Ray comes back and adds a powerbomb to make it a Tower of Doom with Roode taking the brunt of it. Ray tries to pin everyone and gets a bunch of twos. Bubba Bomb to Hardy is countered into the Twist to send Ray to the outside. Roode plants Hardy but Ray breaks up a spear attempt for some reason. Ray fires off a corner splash at Jeff but takes the referee out instead.

Bubba Bomb hits Hardy but there’s no referee. Sting tries to wake up Hebner as Ray FREAKS. Ray walks into the Twist but there’s still no referee. Roode spears Hardy down because main event guys have to use a minimum of two spears a year. The referee is back and the Last Call (perfect one) kills Roode. Ray makes the save by pulling the referee out. Storm dives to the floor and hits the poor referee again. Hardy hits the Twist on Roode in the ring and loads up the Swanton but Roode rolls away.

Roode brings the belt in but Sting pulls it away. They get in each others’ faces and Roode shoves him. Roode says hit me but Sting won’t do it. He spits at the Stinger and Sting accidentally hits Hardy with the belt. It’s Summerslam 97 all over again! Roode insists that Sting count but Sting takes forever…and he counts three for the pin at 15:14.

Rating: B-. Good match but it came off as a little underwhelming. The Against All Odds theme was a good idea, but Storm and Ray stayed down forever off moves that weren’t really anything of note. This also illustrates the main problem in the main event: it’s been focused on Sting vs. Roode rather than Roode vs. anyone else. That’s ok at times, but it’s going to have to end in a match between them and hopefully not in another Sting title reign.

Roode laughs a lot to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. There was more good than bad here, but the bad parts were pretty bad. The second half minus Garrett vs. Gunner is a very solid effort and a good sign of what this company is capable of. The first hour looks like a total mess but I have to wonder how much their timing was thrown off by the injury. It’s a good show, but with some pretty decent sized adjustments it could have been very good.

Results
Zema Ion b. Jesse Sorensen via countout
Robbie E b. Shannon Moore – Inverted DDT
Gail Kim b. Tara – Eat Defeat
Samoa Joe/Magnus b. Matt Morgan/Crimson – Middle Rope Elbow To Morgan
Austin Aries b. Alex Shelley – Last Chancery
Kazarian b. AJ Styles – Fade To Black
Gunner b. Garrett Bischoff – DDT
Bobby Roode b. Bully Ray, Jeff Hardy and James Storm – Roode pinned Hardy after a belt shot from Sting

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Impact Wrestling
Date: January 26, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

Back to Orlando for another week of shows, but after this (next week I believe) they’re off to England. Anyway, we now don’t have a number one contender because of the interference last week. This is probably setting up a triple threat or a fatal fourway at the PPV, which isn’t what I’m wanting but it’s probably going to happen and that’s ok. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the whole issue from last week and how we have no #1 contender.

Jeff is beating up Ray in the back and rams him into a table a few times. Jeff chokes him with a broom and the fight keeps going. The cameraman chases after him and Ray gets in some weak shots. They go through a door and Hardy keeps beating him up. A white truck pulls up with Roode in it and he saves Ray by ramming Jeff into a sign. Ray gets a wooden pallet but opts for some metal thing instead. He drops the pallet on Jeff’s leg and then does it again. They throw him in the truck but Storm comes in for the save but is beaten down as well. Sting eventually chases everyone off. The sight of him sans paint scared them.

Velvet Sky vs. Mickie James vs. Tara

The winner gets Gail at Against All Odds. Tara uses the Matrish to avoid a clothesline so it hits Velvet. We get into the standard formula of two fight while the third is down. Tara and Mickie do most of the fighting as we take a break. Back with Velvet monkey flipping Tara but Mickie breaks up whatever she was trying with a neckbreaker on Sky. Velvet knocks them both down, then Mickie knocks them both down. Thesz Press gets two on Velvet and a spinning kick gets the same on Tara. Velvet breaks up the jumping DDT and Tara hits the spinning side slam on Velvet onto Mickie (as in Sky landed on Mickie) for the pin at 9:37.

Rating: D. I think I’m getting very biased against women’s wrestling, but I just do not care at all about it. It’s whoever is hot at the moment and that’s about it. It’s not like people really care about it but they get a ton of time anyway. I don’t get it but there’s no way around it. Either way, weak match here but Tara vs. Gail could be good.

Gail says bring it.

We see highlights of the opening brawl earlier.

Here are Sting, Storm and Hardy to no music. He asks for Roode and Ray to get out here and the fight continues. Sting holds the good guys back with the bat and tries to calm things down. He gets them apart and says stay on one side. They fight again and eventually it’s made into a tag team tables match for later. That would be better if it wasn’t announced in the clip before the show started.

Shelley is facing Zema Ion and if he wins he gets the shot at Aries at Against All Odds.

Eric Young is getting ready and thinks a stagehand is Sammy Davis Jr. Angelina and Winter come up and imply sex. And they Love hits him low but he’s wearing a cup.

Zema Ion vs. Alex Shelley

Shelley takes over to start and gets a rollup for two. Zema beats him into the corner and doesn’t want this on cameras. He comes out of the corner with a spinning body press for two. Reverse powerbomb by Shelley and a powerbomb puts Ion on the floor. They fly around a bit and Ion sets for the 450 but Shelley moves and Sliced Bread ends this at 4:26.

Rating: C. This was a standard cruiserweight match and that’s about it. Shelley is fun to watch but ever since they’ve changed the weight limit, the title feels very secondary and the matches and feuds have felt like filler instead of something that I should care about. Such is life in a company run by Bischoff and Hogan.

AJ says that this business has changed everyone and tonight, he’s finding out why Kaz is Daniels’ puppet.

Tara says she’ll be training harder than ever and can beat Gail.

Earlier today, Eric went to Garrett’s gym to find out who the trainer is. Eric goes in and sees who it is but sends the trainer away. He was freaked out by it.

Winter/Angelina Love vs. ODB/Eric Young

Eric locks up with the referee who winds up on the apron and is then brought in. Now he tags in Eric and gets locked up with. Mike calls this the Harlem Globetrotters of wrestling. I’ve seen the Harlem Globetrotters. Eric Young is no Globetrotter. Over two minutes in and no contact yet. Winter finally hits him so Eric strips. ODB finally comes in and I’ve never been happier to see her in my life.

A Bronco Buster is messed up and Angelina takes over a few seconds later. Off to Winter who puts her in the Tree of Woe which is an image I don’t need. ODB gets in a shot and Eric throws in the flask for….another shot I guess. There’s the fallaway slam and nip up. Far too much of this match has been spent showing her underwear. Eric comes in and we get stereo airplane spins. TKO ends Angelina at 7:00.

Rating: F. I know Eric Young is popular. I get that, but my goodness I’m not a fan of him at all. This got seven minutes which is a lot of time that could have been used for someone else. Also, there was far too much of ODB taking her clothes off.

Ray and Roode fire each other up for the match later.

Video on the tag title feud with Joe/Magnus challenging the champs.

Samoa Joe vs. Matt Morgan

Joe strikes him into the corner to start but Morgan uses the power of choking and chopping to come back. Morgan plays to the crowd with the elbows but gets caught in the choke. He breaks it quickly and beats on Joe even more. Clothesline gets two. Joe gets a boot up in the corner and a middle rope leg lariat gives him control.

A running charge in the corner and a kick to the head get two. Morgan takes over again and hits some clotheslines. A side slam gets two. Hellevator takes too long to set up so Joe kicks him down and a backsplash gets two. Morgan gets back up and hits a discus clothesline for….three? Mike sounds just as surprised as I am but it got the pin at 4:48.

Rating: C-. This was just ok. It still amazes me how far Joe has fallen in just a few years. He’s floated from random feud to random feud for years now and I still am not clear as to why that’s happened. This feud continues the theory that tag wrestling is done in this country, at least for the time being.

The champs get beaten down with Morgan taking the double team finisher from Magnus and Joe.

Hardy and Storm say they’ll win with a boom.

AJ wants to get to the bottom of this with Kaz and knows Daniels is pulling the strings. Here are Daniels and Kaz and the latter can’t talk to AJ. Daniels talks about how AJ is always throwing a tantrum about something or other. He says Kaz doesn’t owe AJ a thing. AJ goes to the floor but Daniels and Kaz backpedal. Daniels calls AJ a thug so AJ says he’ll turn around and let Kaz take his head off.

Kaz goes to leave but Daniels directs him to go do it. He goes to the apron and can’t do it. Daniels goes in and AJ knocks him to the floor with ease. AJ says Kaz can get in here right now and shake his hand and we’ll forget all this. The idiots at the Impact Zone count for some reason as Kaz gets in. AJ sticks out his hand but Daniels says Kaz isn’t going to do that so he gets out. Daniels says he’s had it and says he’s going to propose AJ vs. Kaz.

Jeff Hardy/James Storm vs. Bobby Roode/Bully Ray

Tables match. They manage to stay calm during the big match intros. SO Sting with a ball bat isn’t enough to keep them apart but Jeremy Borash is? Weird company man. Beer Money explodes on a table as Ray tries to suplex Hardy through one, only for Jeff to hang onto the ropes with his feet. This is all on the floor. Storm spits beer in Roode’s face. Ray takes over on Hardy but Storm makes the save. We take a break with Ray taking a water bottle to the head.

Back with Ray hitting Hardy with a chair. Hardy slingshots Ray into a post and a table is sent into the ring. Storm and Hardy try to suplex Roode through the table but Ray moves the table then takes them both down. It’s one person going through the table to end it. Roode comes back and stomps Storm to the floor so it’s Roode and Hardy in the ring now.

A table is set up in the corner and Hardy is almost able to send Roode through it but Ray makes the save. Ray tries a big boot through Hardy through the table but Jeff moves, leaving a hole in the table. Codebreaker takes Ray out but a spinebuster takes out Storm. Ray puts Hardy’s head against the post and punches it for awhile.

Storm goes into the steps and Hardy is put on the table in the ring. Ray goes up but Storm kicks him down. Now Storm goes up and Roode loads up a superplex through the table but Jeff moves. Hardy pulls Roode down and hits a Twist so he can put Roode on the table. Storm elbows Roode through it to win at 14:00.

Rating: C+. Not a bad table match and it was pretty fun on top of that. I’d assume this will wind up being a fourway for the title which is fine and would be a good way to shift it over to Hardy. This was a fun way to end the show as table matches are always popular for some reason that I’ve never quite gotten.

Post match, Ray destroys the winners with a chair and Hardy is powerbombed through a table.

Overall Rating: C-. I’m not a fan of TNA lately. The stories are all there and mostly make sense, but nothing they’re doing is grabbing me. Pretty much it’s “this happens then this happens which leads us to this.” That’s fine, but it’s not going to get people excited about things. It’s not a bad show at all but it really isn’t all that interesting. I couldn’t get into it all night and was just wanting it to end, which isn’t a good thing.

Results
Tara b. Mickie James and Velvet Sky – Pinned James after a spinning side slam to Sky
Alex Shelley b. Zema Ion – Sliced Bread #2
ODB/Eric Young b. Angelina Love/Winter – TKO to Love
Matt Morgan b. Samoa Joe – Discus Clothesline
Jeff Hardy/James Storm b. Robert Roode/Bully Ray – Storm put Roode through a table

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