WWE Vault: Iconic Tag Teams Earliest Appearances Collection: The Prequels

Iconic Tag Teams Earliest Appearances Collection
Commentators: Gordon Solie, Keith Hart, Jim Ross, Mr. Perfect, Vince McMahon, Jim Ross, Michael Hayes, Dean Hill, Jim Cornette, Byron Saxton, Kevin Patrick, Bruno Sammartino, Al Snow

This is part of Tag Team Week on the WWE Vault and in this case it’s a look back at when some famous tag teams first got together. I’m going to assume there is an unseen asterisk that says “on television in a big promotion” but I’ll take what I can get. This has the potential to be rather interesting so let’s get to it.

From a Smackdown dark match, September 16, 2003.

Paul London/Spanky vs. Albert/Sean O’Haire

What a random heel team. Albert shoves Spanky (Brian Kendrick) down to start and unloads on him in the corner. Spanky gets in some right hands of his own but O’Haire comes in for a chop. It’s off to London to strike away but Albert cuts him off, including the catapult into the bottom rope for two.

O’Haire plants him in the corner for two and the slow beating ensues. London manages a double knockdown with O’Haire though and it’s Spanky coming in to pick up the pace. Albert charges into a boot in the corner and Spanky hits a tornado DDT for two. London and O’Haire go outside, leaving Spanky to reverse the Baldo Bomb into a bulldog. O’Haire interrupts though and Albert’s over the shoulder backbreaker finishes Spanky at 7:49.

Rating: C+. That’s quite the interesting tryout, as rather than getting a win over the makeshift team, London and Spanky lose in their first time out. I’m not sure the point of that as it’s not like the masses were going to see it, but you could see the chemistry already coming together. A fast paced young team is something that works almost every time and London/Spanky did it very well.

From Georgia Championship Wrestling TV, June 11, 1983.

Road Warriors vs. Randy Barber/Joe Young

And yes, this actually is their first time teaming together (at least on television). They’re also in matching leather hats and vests, with Paul Ellering wearing a snazzy top hat. The Warriors are also the National Tag Team Champions, winning the titles in a tournament that didn’t actually happen. Hawk drives Barber into the corner and it’s off to Animal to drop a leg. Young comes in and gets forearmed in the corner, followed by a double clothesline. A slingshot splash finishes for Hawk at 2:05. Total squash, as it should have been.

From a WWE house show, October 4, 2014.

Kofi Kingston/Xavier Woods vs. Stardust/Goldust

I’m not sure if Goldust and Stardust’s Raw Tag Team Titles are on the line here or not but Big E. is here with the not yet New Day. Actually Stardust clarifies that this is NOT a title match, which is some nice attention to detail. After confirming that we are in Trenton, New Jersey and arguing about whether or not the town is awful, we’re ready to go with Kingston and Stardust starting tings off.

They fight over a top wristlock and then trade some flips, with Stardust stopping to dance. Kingston sticks the landing on a monkey flip and sends Stardust into the corner for the tag off to Woods. The Honor Roll gets two and it’s time to work on Stardust’s arm. Kingston’s high crossbody gets two but Stardust takes him up against the ropes for a shot from Goldust. Kingston is right back with a jumping back elbow and Woods gets two off a middle rope clothesline as the fans are only somewhat into this.

They fight to the floor for something we can’t see (single stationary camera and all that) and come back inside for Goldust’s chinlock on Woods. That doesn’t last long so it’s the snap powerslam so Stardust can come back in to stomp away. Another chinlock goes on and for a bit longer this time, though Woods is able to shove off the ensuing bulldog attempt. Kingston comes back in to clean house and everything breaks down. The referee tries to get Woods out, leaving a springboard spinning kick to the head Hart Attack to drop Kingston for two. Woods is back up for UpUpDownDown to pin Goldust at 10:43.

Rating: C+. Much like London and Spanky, you could see the foundations from the start here, though they had a long way to go with the details. What mattered the most was Kingston and Woods (with Big E. of course) working well together. They had the athleticism and natural chemistry and those are the kinds of things that are either there or not from the start.

From Stampede Wrestling, July 11, 1983.

Dynamite Kid/Davey Boy Smith vs. Cuban Assassin/Ciclon Negro

As tends to be the case, we’re joined in progress with a brawl on the floor before Assassin takes Kid (bleeding from an attack by Bad News Allen earlier in the night) inside. Smith, who was jumped earlier as well, tries to make a save but gets tossed as well. We settle down to Negro hammering on Kid up against the ropes but he accidentally elbows Assassin. The tag brings Smith back in to clean house, including letting Negro hit Assassin AGAIN.

A dropkick takes Assassin down, followed by a headscissors and headlock takeover at the same time (a big spot in 1983). The villains finally get it together and send Smith into the corner, which lasts all of a few seconds before it’s back to the rather bloody Kid. Some flips and clotheslines have Negro down but he manages a knee to the ribs to cut Kid off. Negro runs into Assassin for the third time in less than five minutes, allowing Kid to drop a knee for the pin at 5:45.

Rating: C. I wasn’t feeling this one as much as it came off more like the villains screwing up more than Kid and Smith winning. They idea of Kid and Smith being in trouble and having to overcome adversity was fine, but it didn’t feel like they were better. The Assassin and Negro seemed to run out of ideas rather quickly and that only helped the good guys so much.

From Superstars, June 1, 1996.

New Rockers vs. Hardy Boyz

The entrances let commentary plug the Ultimate Warrior’s comic book and you can hear Vince hating it. Cassidy and Matt start things off with Cassidy easily taking him down. Jeff is pulled in and the Hardys are sent outside, setting up some dives and….I guess dancing from the Rockers. Commentary isn’t sure what is wrong with Jannetty and that is an essay question we don’t have time to answer.

Jeff’s bandanna is pulled over his eyes to keep up the beating. Cassidy gets in a nasty spinning belly to belly and a double elbow drops Jeff for two. The Rockers get Jeff up for a kind of Alley Oop/top rope bulldog combination (which doesn’t really work for the most part) for the pin at 3:41.

Rating: C+. Total destruction and it’s bizarre to see, but the Hardys would wind up being fine while the New Rockers are a punch line. The Rockers were little more than a running joke and they weren’t going to be a big deal, but they were still decent enough in the ring. This was more of a case of the Hardys being a detail, but you have to start somewhere.

From the Global Wrestling Federation, April 17, 1992.

Ebony Experience vs. Brute Force

This might be interesting as you might not know which is the important team. In this case it would be the Experience, who would show up in WCW the next year as Harlem Heat. If you’ve never heard of Global….well just be lucky actually, as it was not very good. Booker is backed up to the ropes by #1 to start as Gorgeous Gary Young joins commentary to scout. Stevie comes in with a double clothesline to clear the ring. #2 comes in and gets kneed in the face as Young isn’t overly impressed so far.

Booker gets clotheslined down but pops up with the yet to be named Spinarooni, only to get taken into the wrong corner. Commentary remembers that Brute Force are actually Slammer and Jammer (I’m guessing someone gave him a note) as Booker misses a charge into the corner. Jammer (I guess, though I can’t imagine it matters) misses a dropkick but avoids a clothesline. Booker is back up with a clothesline, allowing the tag off to Ray (commentary gets the Experience confused) as everything breaks down. Jammer shoves the referee down and it’s a DQ at 5:54.

Rating: C-. While this wasn’t the team’s debut (they had begun teaming in the late 80s), it was their first spot in a bigger promotion. You could see the team working together well, which makes sense for brothers. Brute Force was….well hey did you see the Experience? They were pretty good.

Post match we get a tease of an interview with BARRY HOROWITZ but we have to go to the next match. Dang it that’s such an unfair tease.

From a Wrestling Challenge dark match, April 5, 1993.

Kip Winchester/Barry vs. Barry Horowitz/Reno Riggins

I’m guessing the ring announcer got confused, as Winchester’s partner is named Brett Colt and the team will eventually be known as the Smoking Gunns (the better known Billy and Bart Gunn names would come with their next dark match). We take a good while for the Gunns to be ready and the women REALLY seem to approve. Or maybe they’re fans of Horowitz’s mullet. Either way, Billy (er, Kip) grabs a headlock, followed by a hiptoss into an armbar. Bart (er…eh I did that joke already) comes in to stay on the arm and an assisted Russian legsweep gets two.

Riggins avoids a crossbody and Bart is taken into the wrong corner so the alternating beatdowns can ensue. Horowitz’s catapult sends him into the bottom rope and a northern lights suplex gets two. The abdominal stretch goes on for a bit, followed by Horowitz’s jawbreaker for two more. The chinlock is broken up and a collision gives us a double down. Billy comes in to clean house with some dropkicks and a powerslam plants Riggins. A spinning side slam plants Riggins again and Billy hits a not great looking top rope bulldog for the pin at 8:41 (and Barry is suddenly Brett Colt).

Rating: C. The Gunns were basically what they would become right out of the gate and that’s fine. The cowboy trope has been done for decades in wrestling and it still works here. Throw in something like the cap guns they fired off before the match and you easily get the idea of the team. It’s not a good or memorable match at all, but it was a case of what you see is what you get, which is fine.

From WCW TV, June 10, 1989.

Steiner Brothers vs. The Raider/Snake Brown

The Steiners had already had some house show matches but close enough. Also, Raider is Randy Barber, who was in the Road Warriors’ first match as well. Rick has a big fan in the crowd and gives her his jacket in a nice moment. Scott powerslams Raider down and gives hands it off to Rick, who runs both of them over. The Steiners clear the ring, allowing Rick to jump onto Scott’s back for a bit. Brown comes in and gets caught with Scott’s spinning belly to belly, followed by Rick’s overhead version. An elbow gives Rick the pin at 1:47.

Post match the Varsity Club comes in and get beaten up in a hurry before their match at the Clash Of Champions the next week.

From OVW TV, April 17, 2004.

Joey Matthews/Johnny Nitro vs. Matt Cappotelli/Maven

Melina is here with Matthews and Nitro. We’re joined in progress with Matthews getting beaten down and sent outside for the introductions and opening bell. Matthews gets elbowed in the face by Maven, allowing Cappotelli to come in for a legdrop. A double clothesline drops Nitro and Matthews with Nitro bailing to the floor. That lets Nitro hide behind Melina and Matthews gets in a cheap shot from behind.

Back in and a bridging northern lights suplex gets two on Cappotelli, allowing Nitro to come in. An uppercut to the back of the neck gets two but Matthews accidentally crashes into Nitro. Cappotelli bulldogs his way over to Maven to clean house, including a missile dropkick for two on Nitro with Matthews making the save. Melina comes in to rake Maven’s eyes and Nitro’s spinning fisherman’s suplex finishes at 4:50.

Rating: C. Now this was a case where the team had a lot of development to go, as MNM was pretty much just there in name only. They were all there, but they didn’t have the look or gimmick whatsoever. That would come in time, but for now it was pretty much Morrison’s athleticism carrying things. As for the match, you’re in a bit of trouble when Maven is your biggest star.

From Main Event, September 16, 2021 (oddly enough the last episode I watched when I was regularly covering Main Event).

Humberto Carrillo/Angel Garza vs. Lucha House Party

Carrillo and Garza (Los Garza) being introduced as “iconic” is more than a bit of a stretch. Carrillo and Metalik trade some armdrags to start before Dorado comes in with a top rope hurricanrana. The pop up dropkick sends Garza outside and the Party hit stereo flip dives as we take a break.

We come back with Metalik hitting a top rope splash for two and grabbing a chinlock on Carrillo. That’s broken up and it’s back to Garza for a backbreaker. Carrillo suplexes Metalik for two more but Metalik is back with a super hurricanrana. Dorado gets the tag and cleans some house, including a running headscissors to Garza. A nice superkick sets up a high crossbody for two, followed by the Golden Rewind. Metalik’s moonsault sets up Dorado’s moonsault for two as Garza makes the save. Garza comes in, TAKES OFF HIS PANTS, and hits the Wing Clipper for the pin at 6:02.

Rating: C+. This was one of the better matches thus far, which shouldn’t be a surprise as it takes a bit more time to get to WWE TV (as low as Main Event might be) than some of the other places these matches have aired. Carrillo and Garza are far from “iconic”, but I guess they needed to fill in some time. The House Party is something that can work at pretty much any time and they were starting to click when they were split up.

From an AWA house show, April 19, 1987.

Tag Team Tournament First Round: Nasty Boys vs. Curt Hennig/Greg Gagne

The Nastys (Brian Knobbs and Jerry Saganowich (his real name), as they were still workshopping the whole thing) are in their second match together, which I think we can call close enough. Hennig and Knobbs start things off with Knobbs ducking a right hand, which hits Gagne instead.

Back up and Hennig stares at Knobbs a bit before Knobbs drops him with a shoulder. Sags comes in and gets caught with a running dropkick into an armdrag as apparently Knobbs is the key to the team. It’s back to Knobbs for a clothesline so Sags comes back in. That’s fine with Hennig, as he and Gagne take turns working on the leg. Gagne sits on the leg and grabs a standing Figure Four.

With that broken up, so Gagne kicks the leg out again and cranks away. More kicks finally draw Knobbs in for the save before he gets in legally, with a headlock takeover to Hennig. Sags distracts the referee so Knobbs can choke away in the corner but Hennig gets in a shoulder for the double down. The stereo tags bring in Gagne and Sags, with the former getting in a double noggin knocker. The dropkick hits Sags and Hennig’s missile dropkick finishes at 10:54.

Rating: C+. The Nasty Boys weren’t really close to what they would become here, as they more or less wrestled a really basic match rather than their traditional brawling style. Putting them in there with a team as experienced as Hennig and Gagne was smart as they can help with anyone, though the Boys had a long way to go. That being said, they picked it up fast, which is all the more impressive.

From (I believe) WWC, October 14, 1987.

Wild Samoans vs. Miguel Ramos/Sabu

It isn’t the famous Samoans, but rather Fatu and Samu, who would become known as the Headshrinkers. It’s also not the famous Sabu, but rather the wrestler who would be better known as Invader #1. Samu takes Sabu back into to the corner to start and gives him an early slam. A spinwheel kick drops Sabu again and it’s off to Fatu for a belly to back suplex/clothesline combination. Ramos comes in and is immediately knocked down for a falling headbutt. With Sabu knocked to the floor, a belly to back superplex sets up a Superfly Splash to give Fatu the pin at 4:09.

Rating: C. This was kind of a weird pick as the team was pretty much nothing like what they would become. This was more the Samoan Gangster Party under a different name and as a longtime Headshrinkers fan, I’m glad they made the change. The top rope splash looked great as usual though, and stuff like that was enough to give the team a chance.

From Championship Wrestling, April 20, 1985.

Hart Foundation vs. Mario Mancini/SD Jones

Jimmy Hart is here with the Foundation. Neidhart powers Jones up against the ropes to start and they trade some shoves. Mancini comes in to work on the arm and is quickly forearmed down. Hart adds a dropkick and rakes Mancini’s eyes over the rope. The Hart Attack finishes at 2:39. Total squash, with the finish looking great of course.

From OVW TV, May 24, 2006.

Southern Tag Team Titles: Cryme Tyme vs. Kasey James/Roadkill

James and Roadkill are defending. James and the Neighborhoodie (JTG) start things off with the latter grabbing some early slams. Neighborhoodie leapfrogs him and stops to dance, only to walk into a slam from James. Roadkill comes in for a World’s Strongest Slam but a Vader Bomb misses. It’s off to Gaspard to kick Roadkill down for two and Neighborhoodie adds a pop up splash in the corner.

Roadkill fights out of the corner without too much trouble though and it’s back to James to pick up the pace. Gaspard is there to cut him off before missing a splash. That’s enough for Roadkill to come back in and clean house, including a Boss Man Slam for two on Neighborhoodie. Everything breaks down with James and then Roadkill hitting some running corner splashes. Roadkill’s top rope splash connects but cue Cherry for a distraction. Deuce N Domino run in with Cherry’s skates to knock Roadkill silly and put Neighborhoodie on top for the pin and the titles at 6:25.

Rating: C. This was a rather odd choice to end on, as Cryme Tyme was more of a product of their time than anything remotely important long term. The Neighborhoodie was basically the same as he would be as JTG, while Gaspard needed some adjustments. The gimmick didn’t seem to be there yet either, but that’s the point of being in developmental.

Overall Rating: C+. The thing to remember here is that these were the teams’ first (or close enough) appearances. They all needed to be fine tuned to become the versions that would work during their heydays. That being said, for what is in essence a bunch of prequels, this was a fun look back, even with some rather odd choices for teams. They could easily do something else like this, and that’s something I could definitely see happening with the way the Vault goes.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter and Bluesky @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




SuperBrawl VI (2025 Redo): Hogan vs. All Y’All (Includes Full Show)

SuperBrawl VI
Date: February 11, 1996
Location: Bayfront Center, St. Petersburg, Florida
Attendance: 7,200
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan, Dusty Rhodes

It’s a double main event here and that should make for a good show. The two main events happen to both be inside a steel cage, with Randy Savage defending the World Title against Ric Flair, plus Hulk Hogan vs. the Giant. Other than that, we have the usual variety of title matches, plus a respect match between Brian Pillman and Kevin Sullivan which I’m sure won’t mean much. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is a very, very generic “here’s a voiceover listing off the matches”, though at least the guy doing the voice is energetic.

Commentary hypes up the cage matches.

Public Enemy vs. Nasty Boys

Thank goodness this is a street fight. It’s a brawl to start with the Nastys being sent outside with the Enemies following them. That means it’s already time for a table, but Sags chairs the heck out of the table wielding Rock. Grunge chairs Sags right back and the table is set up at ringside. Knobbs slams Rock off the apron and through the table for two (as street fight apparently means falls count anywhere) as Sags comes back with a trashcan (actually complete with trash for a change).

Back in and Sags piledrives Grunge through a trashcan, with Grunge getting a foot on the rope for the save. Knobbs suplexes Rock through a table at a merchandise stand which would only be there for this segment as fans wouldn’t be allowed near there. They take turns smashing each other with trashcan lids until Knobbs is laid on a table, with Rock missing a flip dive through the table. Knobbs hits him with a piece of the table for the pin at 7:49.

Rating: B. I can appreciate the idea that the four of them didn’t bother trying to do anything other than beat the fire out of each other. It’s not a good match and barely wrestling, but that’s exactly what they were going with here. That made for an entertaining match and I had a good time with the whole thing as they were certainly putting in the work here.

Gene Okerlund talks about how two former WWF champions could be on their way to WCW. I’m sure that won’t go anywhere. Anyway, Konnan is ready to defend the US Title and won’t let the fans down. He’s beaten the One Man Gang before and he’ll do it again.

TV Title: Johnny B. Badd vs. Diamond Dallas Page

Badd is defending and is putting up the title and the Diamond Doll (Kimberly) and the winner gets her remaining Bingo winnings, which is about six and a half million dollars (1996 WCW was weird). It’s a brawl on the floor to start with Page being whipped into the barricade. Badd flips him over the top, leading into the regular discussion of whether or not that counts as a DQ.

Back in and Badd gets in a snapmare into a backslide for two but Page knocks him down without much trouble. Page wants a TEN from Kimberly, who turns him down, and then talks a lot. Badd’s sunset flip gets two but Page is back with a running tornado DDT. Instead of covering, Page poses and yells even more (Heenan: “Oh no.”) so Kimberly gives him a ZERO.

Page chokes away and grabs the chinlock as things slow down a good bit. Back up and Badd gets two off a rollup, followed by an ax handle. Badd hits him in the ribs, with Schiavone saying it was right in the solar-plexus. Heenan: “That’s just outside of Phoenix. About 20 minutes.” A top rope sunset flip and a sitout powerbomb give Badd two but Page plants him right back down. The sleeper goes on but Badd jawbreaks his way to freedom, setting up a sleeper of his own. That’s broken up so Badd hits a quick Tombstone for the pin at 15:00.

Rating: C+. This was around the time when Badd had gotten rather good at everything he did and figured out his style to the letter. That was on display here, as his high flying stuff worked well and he felt like a star in the making. It’s also weird to see Page as anything less than the polished star he would become, but he was far different at this point.

Harlem Heat is ready to fight Sting and Lex Luger for the Tag Team Titles. Then they’ll move on to face the Road Warriors (who get the winners of Harlem Heat vs. Sting/Luger later tonight).

Tag Team Titles: Sting/Lex Luger vs. Harlem Heat

Sting/Luger are defending. Booker knees Sting into the corner to start so it’s off to Luger. Some forearms have Booker in trouble but he gets up a boot to stop a charge in the corner. It’s already back to Sting, with Booker grinding away on a headlock. Sing suplexes his way out and hands it off to Luger, who misses that big elbow that has missed every time ever, allowing the Heat to take over. The slow beating is on and we hit the nerve hold on Luger, with commentary talking about how hard it’s going to be to wrestle again tonight.

Booker comes back in for a heck of an ax kick and grabs the front facelock. Heenan wonders why Sting won’t come in and Rhodes says that Sting isn’t a dummy. Yes he is. Luger makes the tag but the referee doesn’t see it, but Sting comes in anyway and hammers away. Ray pulls the top rope down to send Sting outside, leaving Luger and Ray inside. Cue the Road Warriors to hit Ray in the ribs with something made of metal to give Luger the pin at 11:49.

Rating: C-. Rather boring match for the most part here, with a lot of laying around and going in slow motion, which shouldn’t be the biggest surprise as Sting and Luger have another match tonight. Sting and Luger are a big time tag team, even if they have some issues (to put it mildly). Not much of a match here, but there are some extenuating circumstances.

Post match Sting and Luger are happy with their win, though Sting doesn’t know what happened with the Road Warriors, with Luger moving them along before anything can be said.

US Title: Konnan vs. One Man Gang

Konnan is defending after taking the title from the Gang a few weeks ago. Gang hammers him down in the corner to start, which is about all you should expect from him here. Back up and Konnan hits a dropkick to send him into the ropes, where a crossbody sends Gang outside. A running flip dive off the apron drops Gang again but he drops Konnan again without much trouble.

Back in and Gang slowly hammers away, including a side slam, and we look at a WCW Motorsports driver in the crowd. Konnan fights up and hits some dropkicks but misses another, allowing Gang to hit the 747. Gang pulls him up at two and commentary realizes this is stupid. The middle rope 747 misses (ignore that Konnan had moved before Gang jumped) and a top rope flip dive gives Konnan the pin at 7:48.

Rating: D+. There’s just only so much you can do with this kind of a match. The Gang is someone who can do well enough, but that wasn’t the case here as he was just doing the big man offense and then screwed himself over. The interesting note: Gang was only 36 years old here. He’s one of those guys who looked WAY older than he was as I would have guessed he was in his early to mid 40s by this point.

The Road Warriors have no issue with Sting, but they’ll do anything to hurt Luger, which is why they took out Harlem Heat earlier. Tonight, it’s time to take the titles back. Hawk says they’ll be deviating septums and detatching retinas.

Taskmaster vs. Brian Pillman

This is an I Respect You strap match, as they’ll be tied at the wrist with a strap and you only win by making your opponent say “I Respect You”. They go straight to the brawl to start and trade some whips with the strap (which isn’t attached yet). Pillman grabs the mic and says “I RESPECT YOU…..BOOKERMAN” to give Taskmaster the win at 59 seconds.

Ok so what happened here. Basically Pillman was doing his Loose Cannon thing and he and Sullivan (or Eric Bischoff, depending on who you believe) decided to work everyone. This wound up resulting in Bischoff firing Pillman, who was supposed to go to ECW and then come back. The catch was he wound up signing with the WWF instead, which was basically what he wanted all along and needed to get out of his contract with WCW. In theory at least, as it’s one of those stories that has about 14 different versions over the years.

As for here though, Arn Anderson comes out in street clothes and he’ll be doing the match with Sullivan instead.

Arn Anderson vs. Kevin Sullivan

Anderson hammers him down to start and ties up Sullivan’s legs. That’s broken up and Sullivan gets in a low blow before whipping away. Back up and Anderson whips away as well, allowing him to choke Taskmaster in the ropes. That’s not enough yet so Sullivan fights back, only for Ric Flair to come out and call it off, saying it’s time to take out Randy Savage and Hulk Hogan. They seem to agree and we’ll call it a no contest at 3:25.

Rating: C. They didn’t have time to do anything here and that’s the smart move, as there was no reason for these two to be fighting. It’s a fine example of “they did what they could”, which was giving the fans the violence advertised, albeit not with the right people. I can’t bring myself to get mad at them here as it’s not their fault that they were thrown into a rough spot.

Post match they seem to agree, which feels like a way to fill time. Flair yells at some fans too.

The Giant promises to be really, really, extra super mega evil in the cage. Jimmy Hart shouts a lot.

Tag Team Titles: Road Warriors vs. Sting/Lex Luger

The Warriors are challenging. Luger tries to walk out but Sting gets him to come back…eventually, and we’re finally ready to go. Well hang on as Luger runs off again and has to be coaxed back, which finally allows the opening bell. Hawk runs Sting over with a shoulder to start and then hits a dropkick. Sting is sent outside but comes back in for a swinging neckbreaker.

They go down into some awkward grappling until Hawk grabs an STF. Sting makes the rope so Animal comes in for an armbar. That’s broken up and Sting gets over for the tag to Luger, who is tentative at best to come in. Luger kicks away but walks into a big boot from Animal, followed by a powerslam. Animal grabs another armbar before handing it off to Hawk to hit a corner clothesline. Luger is sent outside and into the barricade, which fires him up for some reason.

A clothesline drops Hawk and Sting is back in for a snap suplex. Animal comes back in and gets knocked down as well, only for Sting to do his falling low blow. Now Luger is willing to come in for an atomic drop but the threat of Hawk coming in means it’s back to Sting. The top rope splash hits raised knees and it’s back to Hawk to beat on Luger. The chinlock goes on but Luger hits a quick jawbreaker, allowing Sting to come in for…a lockup.

Animal is sent into the corner for the Stinger Splash but Hawk makes the save with a clothesline. Luger doesn’t seem to mind, prompting Rhodes to ask “WHAT IS HE DOING”. Hawk is right back with a chinlock and bodyscissors, followed by the same thing from Animal. Sting fights up again and hits a suplex but Animal pops up. Animal’s suplex makes Sting pop right back up as well (the fans like that) so Animal hits a dropkick. Everyone brawls to the floor…and the referee throws it out at 13:55.

Rating: C-. They were starting to go somewhere with Luger not wanting to get involved and the four of them brawling around. The problem is they didn’t get very far out of first gear and things were just picking up when they stopped. It was another case where they didn’t want either side to lose so we got this rather lame ending instead. Give it a finish and it’s better, but there was only so much to be gotten out of a match like this.

Ric Flair, with Woman, is ready to make Randy Savage bleed, sweat and cry in the cage, as Flair takes the title back.

The cage is lowered.

Ad for Uncensored. Oh sweet goodness that show.

Randy Savage is glad to have Elizabeth back and says it’s time to expect the unexpected in the cage. The blue and yellow are a cool color combination for Savage.

Commentary hypes up the World Title match.

WCW World Title: Ric Flair vs. Randy Savage

Savage is defending and Woman/Elizabeth are here too. Before the match, Flair gives Elizabeth one more chance to switch sides but that’s not happening so we’re ready to go. Flair is rather tentative about getting in the cage so Savage hammers away, only for Flair to chop his way out of trouble. The big knee connects and Flair slugs away….before knocking the referee down. Savage gets a backslide for no count and the referee is back up as Savage hits a clothesline.

Flair drops him with an elbow and fires off the chops in the corner, followed by another elbow to keep Savage in trouble. Savage catches him up top with the slam down and it’s already time for the Figure Four on Flair. The rope is reached but it doesn’t matter in a cage. Savage eventually lets it go and hits him in the face for two before climbing to the top of the cage (that can’t go well).

Flair punches him out of the air to take over again and a suplex gets two. Savage is sent head first into the cage and Flair just lets him hang there for a bit. The real Figure Four goes on, with Flair grabbing the ropes to no avail. Savage grabs them as well so Flair gets into it with the referee, who grabs Flair by the hair for the break. Savage fights back and sends him into the cage as Woman starts the shrieking.

Flair is busted open so Savage goes for the cut, with a few shots knocking Savage back down. Flair’s attempt at going up means it’s time for the trunks to come down (dang he loved that spot WAY too much). Savage covers for two (ignore the bell ringing) so Flair hits him low. Flair starts going up and we get the trunks pulled down AGAIN (thankfully with some censoring this time).

Savage is knocked down hard but Flair collapses as well for a double breather. Back up and Flair is sent hard into the cage, though he’s able to backdrop Savage into the cage (as we go wide because of the cut). Woman throws powder at Savage but misses, only for Elizabeth to hand Flair her shoe. The big shot to the head gives Flair the pin and the title at 18:56.

Rating: B+. These two were basically incapable of having a bad match so giving them the better part of twenty minutes in a cage with an emotional finish was a guaranteed hit. They worked well together and it’s fun watching them just trying to hurt each other. Savage never really came close to winning either, which wound up not even being an issue, as it was more about the violence and surviving than going for a win.

Post match Elizabeth is rather pleased with what happened and goes to stand next to Woman. Cue Hulk Hogan to chase them off and hit Arn Anderson (here to celebrate) with Flair with a chair. Savage is taken out after being hit in the eye, with Hogan being nice enough to help him.

Hogan (with his eye bandaged after a recent attack) rants about Elizabeth and thinks it might go back to when they officially separated four years ago. He does remember Elizabeth’s shoe coming off pretty fast on Nitro so maybe something was up. There won’t be any Savage having his back tonight so the big man upstairs will cover his blind side.

Hulk Hogan vs. The Giant

In a cage, escape only (note that you have two cage matches with different rules, because WCW), with Taskmaster and Jimmy Hart here too. Hogan sends him into the cage to start and fires down the right hands in the corner. A bite to the head and rake to the back keep Giant in trouble but he forearms Hogan in the back. The knuckle lock keeps Hogan down and Giant kicks him in the ribs a few times for a bonus.

Hogan is sent into the cage and then choked with a shirt, leaving Giant to rattle his neck. Giant misses the big elbow but Hogan isn’t able to slam him so early. The stomping continues and Hogan is sent into the cage for a bonus. It’s too early to go through the door so Giant gives him a backbreaker to stay on the back.

Hogan goes into the cage again and we hit the bearhug (of course). That stays on for a rather long time until Hogan fights out, only to get caught in the chokeslam. It’s 1996 though so Hogan doesn’t have to sell, meaning it’s time to send Giant into the cage over and over. Three legdrops connect and Hogan goes up, only for Giant to catch him on top. That’s fine with Hogan, who knocks him down and climbs out for the win at 15:04.

Rating: C-. You know what you’re going to get in a Hogan cage match and they didn’t deviate from the plan in the slightest. This was every box checked you could ask for, with Hogan surviving everything, including the chokeslam, and then winning. Giant popping up after three legdrops is stupid in its own right, but this was designed to give Giant lose without taking a pin, though it didn’t really protect him that well.

Post match Hogan grabs a chair and throws Taskmaster inside, leaving Giant cowering. Heenan: “Where’s the rest of the Legion Of Doom?” Cue Meng, the Barbarian, Hugh Morrus, Shark, Zodiac and the One Man Gang. That makes it eight on one…..and HOGAN BEATS THEM ALL UP. Even with the chair, that’s totally ridiculous, and here is Loch Ness, the new monster of the team, who is held back by the team and doesn’t actually get in the cage. Hogan poses to end the show.

Roll credits.

Overall Rating: C. This is a rough one, as the good is rather good, but the boring stuff brings it way down. That’s a problem throughout the show, as Savage vs. Flair (and the rather awesome Liz turn) can only make up for so much of the rest of the show. Sting and Luger’s stuff is interesting outside of the ring, but the parts between the bells….not so much. The Hogan stuff is just horrible though and you could see how ridiculous everything was getting at this point. Overall, it was clear that WCW had potential, but it wasn’t going to matter with Hogan choking the life out of the place.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Best Of Reality Of Wrestling: I’ve Seen Much Worse

Best Of Reality Of Wrestling
Commentators: Brad Gilmore, Anthony Pratt, Matt Topolski, Shaul Guerrero

The title kind of says it all here as we have a DVD collection of matches from Booker T.’s promotion in Texas. This is from a bunch of different shows so there is nothing in the way of continuity here. I’ve only seen a bit from this promotion before so I’m going in blind, which can often be fun. Let’s get to it.

From Summer Of Champions 2, August 8, 2015.

Diamonds Title: Miranda vs. Robin vs. Athena

The title is vacant coming in and Athena is better known as Ember Moon or…well, Athena actually. Robin, who is listed as Ivory on the DVD and is apparently named Ivory Robin, is double teamed down to start but Athena clears the ring. Athena hits back to back suicide dives and throws Robin back inside.

Robin grabs a reverse chinlock but Miranda is back in with a running dropkick for two. A spear on the apron drops Athena for two, as Athena gets her boot on the rope. Back up and Athena hits a suplex, followed by what would become the O Face (seemingly debuting it) on Miranda. Robin throws Athena outside though and steals the pin and the title at 5:25.

Rating: C+. This was short and to the point, as the Women’s Revolution was just starting to come together in WWE so things hadn’t picked up everywhere else. Athena was getting to showcase herself here and it worked rather well. The O Face is still a great finisher and it’s no surprise that Athena was on her way to WWE, as you could certainly see the talent shining through there.

Lita of all people comes out to present the title in a surprise.

From Christmas Chaos XII, December 9, 2017.

Reality Of Wrestling Title: Ayden Cristiano vs. Gino

Cristiano, with Reina, is defending in Lucha Extrema (anything goes) and this is title vs. career. Cristiano starts fast and hits a pair of Helluva Kicks as commentary explains that Cristiano was a father figure to Gino when Gino’s father died. Gino gets sent outside and is kicked down again but fights back. An apron 619 misses so Gino settles for a kick to the head. A hurricanrana off the apron drops Cristiano again for two on the floor, with Reina breaking up the cover.

Gino grabs a chair to chase Reina off but Cristiano uses the chair to knock a dive out of the air. Back up and the apron 619 sends the chair into Cristiano’s face but here is Cristiano’s La Familia to jump Gino. The steps are carried up to the stage, where Cristiano rips up Gino’s father’s mask for the personal touch. Gino fights out and hits a running dive off the steps to put La Familia through some tables.

Cristiano is back with something metal to the face and they come back to ringside, where Gino sends him through the barricade. A hammerlock lariat gives Gino two and the fans come back down in a hurry. Cristiano can’t hit a piledriver on the exposed concrete but a backdrop onto the concrete connects. Back in and Cristiano hits a top rope elbow for two so he grabs a wrench. The turnbuckle is taken off and a running shot to the face gives Cristiano another near fall. They chop it out until Cristiano is sent into the corner. Eat Defeat gives Gino the pin and the title at 14:14.

Rating: B+. They were pulling me into this one with a good story as I wanted to see Gino pull this off. It felt like a big moment to see Gino beat Cristiano, who has apparently tormented him for a good while. That’s the kind of thing that makes for a solid performance and I was into what they were doing. Nice stuff here, especially for two people I barely know.

Post match Gino celebrates and gets the mask back for a bonus.

From Christmas Chaos XI, December 10, 2016.

Reality Of Wrestling Title: Gino vs. Evan Snow

Snow is defending in a ladder match, having won the title after it was stripped from Gino. Snow dances a lot and is billed from Hip Hop, USA. They fight over a lockup to start until Gino misses Eat Defeat. The lockup goes on again until they fall over the top rope and crash out to the floor. Gino wins a slugout on the floor but Snow is back up with a flip dive off the apron.

It’s time for a ladder, albeit not a tall one. We’re clipped to Snow knocking the ladder into Gino’s face and then bringing in a bigger ladder. Snow climbs, only to dive at Gino, who knocks him out of the air. Back up and Snow bridges a ladder into the big one but Gino flips him face first onto the bridged one, sending the whole thing down. Gino gets smart by crushing Snow’s leg in between and with the ladder. Snow starts getting up so Gino is smart enough to get down and take out the leg again.

Gino suplexes him onto the ladder and we take a break. Back with Snow hitting a superkick and giving Gino a Gory Bomb onto the ladder in the corner. They both climb until Snow grabs a sunset bomb (What leg injury?) for the big crash back down. Snow knocks him off the ladder again and jumps from the top over the ladder for a Hip Hop Drop (guillotine legdrop). Back up and Gino grabs Eat Defeat off the ladder for the big crash. That’s enough for Gino to go up and pull down the title at 12:29 shown.

Rating: B-. It was your normal ladder match with all of the big bumps and crashes, though I was a little confused about who I was supposed to be cheering. Gino was the big face a year later but this felt like Snow was the big babyface here. Either way, another good match as this Gino guy isn’t bad.

Post match Rey Mysterio shows up as a surprise to present Gino with a new title belt. Welp, he’s definitely a good guy.

From Final Heat, February 21, 2025.

We recap Harlem Heat challenging the Heavenly Bodies for the Tag Team Titles. Booker T. said the titles had been hijacked so he was going to take the titles back himself. He needed a partner, but Stevie Ray showed up to say Booker really needed his brother. The Bodies weren’t impressed but the match was on.

Tag Team Titles: Harlem Heat vs. Heavenly Bodies

The Bodies (Desirable Dustin/Gigolo Justin) are defending and this is Harlem Heat’s first match together in almost fifteen years. Booker backs Justin into the corner to start and the fans are rather happy. Ray comes in to chop and elbow away in the corner as commentary runs down the teams that Harlem Heat has defeated over the years. It’s back to Booker, who gets taken into the corner by Dustin for some shots to the face.

Booker gets in a superkick to cut that off in a hurry and Ray comes in again for a shot to the ribs. We’re clipped to Justin getting in a cheap shot to Booker from the apron. Booker gets knocked to the floor so Justin can hammer away. Back in and Dustin hits a corner clothesline for two, followed by a front facelock. It’s too early for the tag back to Ray though as Booker is pulled into the wrong corner for some stomping.

We hit the chinlock but Booker fights out, only to get clotheslined back down. The abdominal stretch goes on instead, with Booker hiptossing his way to freedom. Raw gets drawn in before the tag though and Booker gets stomped down in the corner. A double clothesline gets Booker out of trouble and the big tag brings in Ray to clean house. Ray powerslams Dustin for two and everything breaks down, with Booker clotheslining Justin out to the floor. The Ax kick gives Booker the pin and the titles at 10:50.

Rating: C. The match was a pretty basic formula, with Ray’s time in the ring being rather limited. That’s not a bad thing for the most part, as Ray was more of a special attraction than anything else. He was only so good in the first place so having him back after this much of a layoff was going to have limited results. That being said, the title win was a nice moment, even if Harlem Heat would vacate the titles a few weeks later, with the Bodies holding the title for the better part of a year after. Still though, nice enough moment here.

From Ladies Night Out, February 17, 2018.

Diamonds Title: Hyan vs. Kylie Rae

Rae is defending but doesn’t have the belt for some reason. Feeling out process to start with the fans being behind Rae, who does in fact smile a lot. Rae takes her down into a front facelock and gets two off a rollup, which leaves Hyan a bit frustrated. A headscissors sends Hyan into the ropes and a running knee knocks her back out. With nothing else working, Hyan grabs the referee for a distraction and hits the ropes to crotch Rae on top. Some elbows in the corner keep Rae in trouble and Hyan grabs a chinlock.

That’s broken up so Rae gets up an elbow in the corner to cut off a charge. A basement superkick misses for Rae and Hyan grabs a rollup for two. Back up and the basement superkick connects for Rae and she can’t believe the kickout. Hyan starts in on the arm and cranks away before slamming it into the mat for two. A Disarm-Her has Rae in more trouble but Hyan lets her go, instead option for a running knee and another near fall.

Rae knocks her off the top though and a missile dropkick connects to leave them both down. They both get up at a count of nine and trade the forearms until Rae pulls her into the crossface. The rope is grabbed for the break and Hyan gets her own crossface (ignore that it’s not on the arm she had been working over). That’s countered into a rollup for two but Hyan is back with a heck of a Glam Slam for the pin and the title at 13:43.

Rating: B-. Nice match here, with Hyan getting to show what she can do and win the title in a pretty good showdown. These two have had quite the rivalry and it felt like a showdown. Rae is someone who has done some good things in a variety of places over the year and it’s no surprise that she had another good performance here. That Glam Slam at the end was very good too, as Rae landed hard and it looked like a knockout blow.

Post match Hyan gets the title, which was on the stage for some reason.

From No Limits 2017, May 31, 2017.

JJ Blake interrupts the introduction and says he’s the champion of all televisions.

TV Title: Terrale Tempo vs. JJ Blake

Blake is defending inside a cage and there are some weapons hanging from the top. Tempo grabs a headlock to start and we get some rather blatant spot calling on the mat. Blake is back up with a dropkick, only to get crossbodied for two. A jumping elbow gets the same and things slow down as we take a break. Back with Tempo hitting a backdrop and going up, where he grabs a chair.

With Blake down again, Tempo grabs a trashcan, with commentary pointing out that he could just leave instead of going for the weapons. The delay lets Blake come back with a steel rod to the ribs for two. A belly to back suplex gets two on Tempo but he’s right back up to put the trashcan in the corner. Blake is sent into the cage a few times and a spinebuster puts him down again.

Tempo hits a dropkick into the cage but Blake is able to crotch him on top. Blake puts him in the trashcan in the corner and hits a step up dropkick to crush him again. The kickout has Blake panicking and we take another break. Back again with Tempo superplexing him off the cage for the THIS IS AWESOME chants and a double down. Tempo gets a very delayed two so Blake fights up only to get caught in a swinging Downward Spiral for two.

That’s still not enough for Tempo to get out as Blake pulls him back in so they can slug it out on top of the cage. Tempo grabs Blake’s black hammer and knocks him off the top but here is a rather large man (Blake’s training partner Tiny) to pull Tempo out of the air. Tiny throws Tempo back inside and gives him a chokebomb so Blake can get the retaining pin at 13:43 shown.

Rating: B-. Not the best ending, but they had a good match where they beat each other up pretty well. That’s the point of putting them in a cage for a grudge match and it made Tempo feel like enough of a star. I was half expecting Tempo to win anyway in a St. Valentine’s Day Massacre ending but Blake retaining so Tempo can come after the two of them again later is fine too.

From Christmas Chaos XII, December 9, 2017.

Texas Title: Mysterious Q vs. Rex Andrews vs. Johnny Impact

Q, a masked man, is defending, Andrews is a former TV Champion and I’m guessing you know Impact. Andrews drops Impact to start and grabs a Kimura on Q, with Impact making the save. Q and Impact team up to take out Andrews, leaving Impact to shoulder Q down. Impact can’t send him into the corner as Q sends him to the floor. Back in and Andrews cuts off the Q Cutter with an armbar attempt.

Andrews kicks him down into a Fujiwara armbar but Impact makes the save for a showdown. They circle each other for a bit until Andrews suplexes Impact for two. Back up and Impact kicks Andrews down but Q breaks up Starship Pain. They all wind up in the corner, with Impact German superplexing both of them down. Back up and Impact gets beaten between the two of them, only to send them both into the corner.

The sliding German suplex hits Andrews but he rolls away from Starship Pain. Q’s springboard elbow gets two and he plants Impact with a spinning slam. Andrews is back in with a knockdown to Q and a Paige Turner for two on Impact. Andrews gets the cross armbreaker on Impact but has to let it go to knock Q off the top. Back in and Impact puts Andrews down, setting up the standing shooting star press for two. Q shoves Impact off the top as well though and a 450 finishes 12:49.

Rating: B. This was pretty much your standard three way match but beating Impact, even without pinning him, was a good way to make Q feel like a bigger deal. That’s why you bring someone like Impact in and Q looked good in his win. Andrews felt like he was just there for the strong style/MMA influenced offense and that doesn’t really stand out.

Bit of a weird note to end the set: Q poses as commentary advertises Gino vs. Cristiano later in the same night, which is listed earlier in the DVD.

Overall Rating: B-. It’s not a great promotion or anything that hasn’t been done better, but I’ve definitely seen far worse than what was offered here. You had seven matches which take up about two and a half hours with nothing close to bad. The worst match on the whole thing is a Harlem Heat reunion, which is a big enough deal to warrant a spot. I’ve liked the little I’ve seen of Reality Of Wrestling and you can see that, at least in this era, they had some talent that stood out. Good, fun watch here and I could go for a bit more from these people.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

 




WCW Saturday Night – August 27, 1994: Open That Vault

WCW Saturday Night
Date: August 27, 1994
Location: Center Stage, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan

So this was posted live on the incredible WWE Vault YouTube channel and we might as well take a look at it. There doesn’t seem to be anything significant to the show other than the star power and I’ve heard worse excuses to watch the show. We’re just done with Clash Of The Champions XXVIII, meaning Hulk Hogan has been attacked and injured by a masked man. Let’s get to it.

Dig that old school robotics intro. Dang this is a strong flashback right out of the box.

We open with a long Clash recap.

Commentary welcomes us to the show, with Bobby Heenan being fine with being in a neck brace because Hulk Hogan is hurt even worse.

Ricky Steamboat vs. Tom Burton

Steamboat’s US Title isn’t on the line and the Blacktop Bully (Barry Darsow as a mean truck driver, because WCW) yells at Steamboat from the crowd before the match. Burton headlocks him to the mat to start but Steamboa-t drop toeholds him into an armbar. That’s reversed into a suplex to give Burton two and he even cuts off Steamboat’s chops. Steamboat chops him down anyway and, after waiting for Burton to get up, hits the high crossbody for the pin at 2:46. Burton got a good bit in here, mainly because it’s Steamboat and that means a lot of selling.

Gene Okerlund shills the Hotline, as tends to be his custom.

Stud Stable vs. Joey Maggs/Todd Morton

That would be Bunkhouse Buck/Terry Funk with Colonel Parker and Meng. It’s a brawl to start and the Stable is whipped into each other, resulting in quite the pratfall. Back up and Morton, who looks a lot like a smaller Bobby Eaton, monkey flips Buck to no avail. Funk comes in and hammers away but Morton, who even has Eaton style tights, flips out of Buck’s backdrop and hands it off to Maggs. That’s fine with Funk, who plants Maggs with a piledriver so Buck can finish with a left hand at 3:36.

Rating: C. I’m convinced that Funk could make a trip to the dentist fun, as he turned this into an entertaining match. Buck was good in his own right, making this a far more engaging match than it should have been. Maggs was around for a long time and Morton…well he certainly looked like Eaton.

Post match the Stud Stable looks at a clip from the Clash, where Meng no sold Dusty Rhodes breaking a wooden chair over his head. This was a complete redo of Rhodes’ angle with Big Bubba Rogers, which turned him into a star. Back in the arena, the Stable, including Cowboy Arn Anderson, is ready for Dusty and Dustin in WarGames at Fall Brawl. Terry Funk even feels sorry for Dusty!

TV Title: Johnny B. Badd vs. Lord Steven Regal

Regal, with Sir William, is defending and there is a ten minute time limit. They lock up to start and Regal gets backed into the corner a few times. That’s reversed into a battle over arm control, meaning Regal needs to bail over to the ropes. The exchange of arm cranking continues until Regal needs a breather (complete with seething) on the floor.

Back in and Regal avoids a charge to send Badd crashing into the ropes, meaning Regal can grab a cobra clutch. Badd fights up but gets elbowed in the face to put him back down. We have less than two minutes left as Regal knocks him back down for two more. Badd fights up with a backdrop and a suplex but time expires at 9:36 (called 10:00) for the draw.

Rating: C. Not the most thrilling match but they weren’t hiding the impending draw most of the way through. It just wasn’t that interesting though, which isn’t exactly out of the norm for Regal around this time. That is only going to get them so far, but I remember BEGGING someone to take the title from Regal so he was certainly doing something right.

Post match Badd jumps Regal and William so Regal says he wants a rematch at Fall Brawl.

Steve Austin vs. Chris Michaels

Michaels works on the arm to start but gets snapmared down. Austin misses an elbow so Michaels grabs a headlock, only to get taken down for a knee to the back. Austin starts in on the leg before That’s A Wrap (standing reverse figure four) makes Michaels tap at 2:31.

Sting vs. John Faulkner

Sting shoulders him down to start and slaps the turnbuckle a few times but Faulkner kicks away in the corner. That’s shrugged off and the Stinger Splash into the Scorpion Deathlock finishes Faulkner at 1:29. Squash.

Cactus Jack says he and Kevin Sullivan are done. Jack talks about how Sullivan started making Jack’s career work but now they’re through because it’s time to become a singles wrestler. Sullivan’s dyslexic brother Evad (just go with it) tries to calm things down and gets DDTed for his efforts. It’s weird seeing Jack use a one armed version.

Commentary isn’t sure who Dusty and Dustin Rhodes could find as partners in WarGames but we see a video of Dusty going to a rather tough bar. Inside he finds the Nasty Boys, who, after having their nastiness questioned, are talked into joining Dusty and Dustin. This was such a weird choice for WarGames.

Harlem Heat vs. Buddy Wayne/Barry Houston

As has been their custom lately, Harlem Heat gets orders from their mysterious manager over their (brick sized) phone. Booker and Houston start things off as Heenan thinks Harlem Heat is on their way to becoming champions. Houston gets two off a rollup so it’s off to Wayne, who gets kicked in the face. An assisted Stun Gun drops Wayne again and the spinning forearm puts him down for a third time. Ray comes in for a running powerslam and the Heat Bomb (powerbomb/top rope elbow combination) finishes at 4;01.

Rating: C. You could see Harlem Heat starting to come into their own as a team and it was a lot of fun to watch them putting things together. The talent was there and it would eventually turn into one of the best tag team runs in a long time. Not uch of a match here but the phone thing was intriguing at the time.

Post match Harlem Heat gets what seems to be a rather positive phone call. They go over to Gene and say they’re here to stay and want the Tag Team Titles. Their manager will get them to the top and you do not need to know who it is. That would wind up being Sister Sherri.

We look back at Hulk Hogan being attacked by a masked man at Clash Of The Champions, which was WCW copying the Tonya Harding/Nancy Kerrigan story. Later in the night, Ric Flair wanted to be named World Champion but Hogan limped back to the arena and lost the title match…via countout. After the match, the Masked Man (clearly Arn Anderson) came in and wrecked Hogan’s knee. The masked man would lead to Brutus Beefcake headlining Starrcade, again, because WCW, when Mr. Perfect fell through.

Nick Bockwinkel announces that Ric Flair is suspended from wrestling throughout North America. He also bans Sherri Martel for being Flair’s associate. Since it’s Nick Bockwinkel, this takes FAR longer than it needs to.

Vader vs. Chris Nelson

Vader has Harley Race with him and slugs Nelson down, followed by more slugging in the corner. The powerbomb is enough for…well not a pin as Vader doesn’t cover but he insists the referee count Nelson out at 2:03.

We go to the Fall Brawl Control Center, with Ric Flair suspended and Ricky Steamboat st to defend the US Title against Steve Austin (not quite). Speaking of Austin, he talks about how Steamboat has inspired him to wan the title back. Steamboat doesn’t care for Austin’s comments and is ready to give Austin a rematch.

CALL THE HOTLINE!

Tag Team Titles: Nasty Boys vs. Pretty Wonderful

Pretty Wonderful is defending. Sags and Orndorff start things off with some circling until Orndorff stomps him down in the corner. Everything breaks down and some clubberin sends the champs outside. Back in and Knobbs cleans house before Sags grabs a headlock. Roma gets in a cheap shot though and Sags is (illegally) thrown over the top.

Roma’s top rope elbow gets two and he sends Sags face first into the mat to keep him in trouble. Sags fights back and grabs a sleeper before slamming Roma down. That doesn’t last long as Roma goes up, only to dive into a slam. Knobbs comes in and cleans house but throws Roma over the top for the DQ at 9:00.

Rating: C. I never got the appeal of Pretty Wonderful but they were fine enough as a team. That was on full display here as they were mostly trying to have a run of the mill match with the less than traditional Nasty Boys. As usual, the over the top rule is dumb, but that was a thing in WCW forever.

Post match the Stud Stable runs in to beat the Nastys down and post break, the team promises to win WarGames. Terry Funk barks a lot because Dusty is an EGG SUCKING DOG to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The matches were all run of the mill at best but the main thing here is they built up the big match for Fall Brawl while also addressing the big Hogan/Flair story. WCW doesn’t have the best reputation around this time but my goodness there is a lot of talent on here. It was a breath of fresh air to watch and it would be great to see more random shows, either from this era or anywhere else. WWE has such a huge archive and it’s great to see something like this every so often. Lot of fun here, and I could go for more.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Hog Wild: They’ve Got Bikes

Hog Wild
Date: August 10, 1996
Location: Sturgis Motorcycle Rally, Sturgis, South Dakota
Attendance: 5,000
Commentators: Dusty Rhodes, Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan

This is one of the more unique shows that you’ll see as we are outside in front of a bunch of bikers. I’m sure they will be a completely acceptable crowd with no problems or distractions whatsoever. We’re also just into the NWO era and Hollywood Hogan is getting the World Title shot against the Giant. Let’s get to it.

Of note: there were EIGHT Saturday Night matches before the pay per view went on the air, so the bikers might be a little bit sick of wrestling already.

We open with a look at the Sturgis Rally, with no matches mentioned whatsoever.

Tony, Dusty and Bobby…..are dressed in biker gear with more jokes available than I can possibly fathom.

Cruiserweight Title: Ultimate Dragon vs. Rey Mysterio

Dragon (it says Ultimate everywhere else so that’s what we’ll go with) is challenging and has Sonny Onoo with him. Tony asks Bobby where his tattoo and dew rag are and I begin to have nightmares. Thankfully Mike Tenay joins commentary to tell us that this is the first ever meeting. Dragon takes him down by the arm to start but gets pulled into a leglock. Back up and Dragon gets in a shot of his own for a breather into a standoff.

A spinwheel kick drops Rey, sending Dusty into one of his funny rants about move names. Neither can hit a headscissors and we have another standoff. A spinning kick to the chest drops Rey again and there’s the handspring elbow in the corner. The running Liger Bomb doesn’t even get a cover as Dragon grabs a Figure Four of all things instead. With that broken up, Dragon hits his spinning torture rack dropped down into a backbreaker, followed by the surfboard.

Heenan makes jokes about Cesar Romero and Desi Arnaz as Rey gets out and hits a springboard dropkick out to the floor. There’s a baseball slide to knock Dragon off the platform into the dirt, with Rey hitting a HUGE springboard dive (with the camera mostly missing it) to take him down again.

Back in and a springboard hurricanrana keeps the crowd popped but another springboard is dropkicked out of the air. Rey is knocked outside so Dragon hits a slingshot dive to take him down again. They head back inside with Dragon hitting a moonsault for two but Rey catches him on top with a super hurricanrana to retain at 11:36.

Rating: B-. It’s a good opener and both of them would go on to be able to do some far better stuff, but this wasn’t exactly the blowaway match I was expecting. They did their high flying stuff but Rey didn’t really go nuts and Dragon was more about striking and grappling than high flying. What they did worked well enough though, including managing to impress a non-wrestling crowd.

Gene Okerlund, also looking like a….well what WCW thinks a biker looks like, shills the Hotline.

We talk about the rally some more.

Ice Train vs. Scott Norton

They used to be partners as Fire & Ice but then split up. I like Ice Train but is there a reason his name sounds like a Mad Lib? Train also has a bad shoulder coming in to give Norton a target. Norton powers him into the corner to start and chops at the bandaged shoulder, showing that he is at least moderately intelligent. The slugout goes to Norton, who cuts him down with another shot to the shoulder. A rake to the eyes and some more shots to the face send Train outside, where the shoulder is sent into the post.

Back in and Train manages a slam with the good arm. Since it’s just a slam though, Norton chops him down again and cranks on the arm. Train gets up and actually drops Norton with some chops but Norton does it a good bit better. The armbar goes on and Norton drops a leg on the arm to make it even worse. Back up and Norton charges into a powerslam for two but he’s fine enough to hit a clothesline. A Fujiwara armbar makes Train give it up at 5:07.

Rating: D. The match made sense but it wasn’t quite the most thrilling thing in the world. Train had a bad shoulder so Norton went after it over and over. That should be an easy way to go, but you can only get so far with a bunch of chops. Not a very good match, though who was expecting much out of the battle of Fire and Ice?

We get a video from Ric Flair, talking about how serious the NWO is now that they took out Arn Anderson. That is Flair’s best friend, and WCW is his other best friend. The NWO is in trouble now because the Horsemen are involved. That should have been the easiest idea in all of WCW and they managed to screw it up.

Hey look: bikers!

You can get Hog Wild merch!

Madusa vs. Bull Nakano

This is Bike vs. Bike, with the winner getting to destroy the loser’s motorcycle. Wouldn’t that make either winner a heel for this crowd? Nakano’s manager Sonny Onoo and Madusa ride in on the motorcycles, leaving Nakano to just look scary. Nakano jumps her fast with a nunchuck and Dusty LOSES IT over the attack.

Madusa gets bent around the middle rope and a double ax handle to the back puts her down. The USA chants start up and Madusa grabs a chair takedown. Nakano is right back with what would become Paige’s Scorpion Crosslock, followed by a hard slam. We hit the chinlock as commentary talks about how strong Nakano is.

Back up and Madusa snaps off a hurricanrana for two and a spinwheel kick to the face gets the same. Another kick misses and Nakano blasts her with a clothesline for two of her own. Madusa’s bridging German suplex gets two more and Nakano hits something similar for the same. A not great looking sunset flip gives Madusa the next near(ish) fall but Nakano grabs the belly to back suplex, with only Madusa getting her shoulder up for the pin at 4:57.

Rating: C. They were bringing the power game here and it was miles ahead of anything else women were doing in America at this point. The problem was the sloppiness in some points (including the ending), but given the atmosphere they were working in, there was only so much you could expect. Still though, rather hard hitting match as you would have expected.

Post match Sonny Onoo grabs the sledgehammer to go after Madusa’s bike. This goes as well as you would expect it to, as Madusa takes it away and destroys Nakano’s bike instead.

The Steiners are chatting on CompuServe. I don’t think Rick Steiner knows what he is doing.

Commentary thinks we’re going to Gene Okerlund. We’re not going to Gene Okerlund.

Chris Benoit vs. Dean Malenko

Jimmy Hart tries to come out with Dean Malenko, who isn’t interested. Benoit on the other hand has Woman and Elizabeth with him. They jaw with each other a bit to start until Malenko takes him down and hammers away. Benoit kicks him in the ribs to take over but Malenko gets in some boots of his own. A suplex gets two and we hit an early chinlock as Heenan goes into some weird analogy about birds. Benoit fights up and chokes on the rope as Tony has to bring commentary back to the match from their NWO discussion.

A back elbow gives Benoit a few near falls and they go to the pinfall reversal sequence. Malenko wins the battle over a backslide for two as Woman screams a lot. The short armscissors has Benoit down but he muscles Malenko up and drops him down for the break. There’s the snap suplex for two as the fans do not exactly seem thrilled. An abdominal stretch goes on but Malenko grabs the foot to escapes and flips him over.

Commentary talks about how we are coming up on a new millennium and these two could be the future. Eh kind of with one of them. Back up and they hit stereo crossbodies for a double knockdown to get a breather. Malenko goes up but gets knocked out of the air, setting up another snap suplex. The Swan Dive gives Benoit a delayed two and it’s time to fight over a Tombstone until Malenko plants him for a few near falls.

Benoit charges into a boot in the corner but is fine enough to counter a Texas Cloverleaf attempt into a small package for two. They fall out to the floor in a double heap with Malenko blocking a posting by hitting one of his own and it’s time to go back inside. Benoit catches him on top with a heck of a superplex and they’re both down again. Malenko hits a release German suplex for two more as the fans (or more like people who happen to be here) just do not care.

A hard clothesline gives Malenko two as Heenan tries to figure out how many holds Malenko knows (Chris Jericho can be seen in the background taking notes). Benoit slams him down and grabs the Liontamer (Chris Jericho can be seen in the background furiously taking notes) but Malenko makes the rope. A victory roll gives Malenko two and another backslide gets another two. Benoit runs him over for two more but Malenko catches him on top for a superplex. There’s a powerbomb to Benoit but time expires at 20:00.

Actually hang on as we’re going to get a five minute overtime, which the bikers DO NOT like. Benoit jumps Malenko at the start of overtime and grabs the Cloverleaf in the middle of the ring. After over a minute, Benoit lets it go, which seems rather unlike him. Malenko’s leg is done so Benoit kicks away and cranks on said leg on the mat. Some Ric Flair Cannonballs onto the leg set up another hold but Malenko reverses into a cradle as overtime expires.

We get ANOTHER five minute overtime and the bikers boo this out the non-existent building. Malenko snaps off a dragon screw legwhip but Benoit is back up with the dragon suplex for two. Benoit misses a dropkick and gets Cloverleafed, with Malenko switching it into an STF. Woman tries to help Benoit make the rope so Malenko goes after her, allowing Benoit to grab a rollup for the pin at 28:13. The replay shows him grabbing the rope for a bonus, because he is in fact a Horseman.

Rating: B+. You can go a few different ways with the thinking here. On the one hand, it’s a great match with two guys going at it for the better part of half an hour in a pretty bad spot. On the other hands, the fans didn’t care and the wrestlers failed to get over. There might be something to the latter, but consider the situation these guys were in.

These bikers didn’t pay to see a wrestling show. They’re here to see Hulk Hogan and Randy Savage and people from the WWF ten years ago. Benoit and Malenko are small guys they’ve never seen before and don’t care about having a pretty long match. You’re supposed to make the fans happy, but I’m not sure if these people qualify as fans as much as they are just people watching the matches because they’re there. This match was great though so I’ll go with the “these bikers are pinheads” and move on.

Tag Team Titles: Steiner Brothers vs. Harlem Heat

Harlem Heat, with Sheri and Colonel Parker, is defending and the fans do not seem thrilled with them. Everyone stalls for a good bit to start as commentary talks about the NWO. Scott and Booker officially start, with the latter being honked at a lot. The bikers go so nuts that Booker bails to the floor before coming back in to shove Scott for the first contact nearly two and a half minutes in.

Scott isn’t having that and hits a butterfly powerbomb, followed by a quick suplex so the Steiners can clear the ring in a hurry. Back in and Scott shoulders Booker down and a gorilla press makes it worse. The ten right hands in the corner rock Booker and he bails to the floor for another breather. This time it’s Stevie coming in to hammer on Scott, which actually works this time.

Scott runs Stevie over with ease, allowing the tag to Rick for a chinlock. Stevie gets up so Rick Steiner Lines him back down as this is totally one sided so far. A rake to the eyes into a side slam drops Scott as Sherri is shouting about having a nervous breakdown. That is only going to get worse as Scott hits a spinning belly to belly for two more. Rick comes back in for a suplex of his own and a “SHUT UP B****” to Sherri. Stevie gets in a cheap shot from the apron to finally slow the Steiners down for a bit.

A clothesline sets up a chinlock but Rick pops up for his weird powerslam. That’s enough to bring Scott back in for an STF of all things before Rick comes back in for his own chinlock. Stevie fights up though and Booker low bridges him down to the floor to really put Rick in trouble for a change. Back in and Booker’s side kick only crotches him on top but Stevie makes the fast save. Stevie comes in to strike and choke away, followed by a big boot to put Rick down again.

It starts getting dark so the lights come on, meaning more engine revving as Booker grabs a chinlock. Rick fights up so it’s a Spinarooni into a side kick for no cover, with Dusty kind of complaining without actually saying anything negative (as Dusty tended to do). Booker misses a middle rope knee though and Rick makes the easy tag to Scott. Everything breaks down and Parker throws powder in Booker’s face by mistake. Since she seems to know Parker is a moron, Sherri is right there to throw it in Scott’s eyes as well. A cane shot to the head is enough to finish Scott at 17:53.

Rating: C. This was a longer match and that was both a good and a bad thing. The Steiners were both getting a bit slower at this point, with Scott being so muscular he looked like a cartoon. That does not make for better long form matches, though a major title match should get the extra time. It also didn’t help that the Steiners dominated for so long, but I could watch the Steiners throw people around for hours at a time, making it a rather enjoyable domination. In other words, I’m all over the place on this one and we’ll go with right in the middle.

Heenan sounds a bit, ahem, out of it on the replays. Wouldn’t surprise me actually.

Here’s a look at wrestlers on motorcycles.

Here’s a look at the rally.

US Title: Eddie Guerrero vs. Ric Flair

Flair, with Woman and Elizabeth, is defending. They fight over a lockup into the corner until Eddie knocks him outside in a hurry. Back in and Eddie grabs a headlock but Flair belly to back suplexes him down with a weird landing, possibly hanging up Eddie’s arm. Eddie comes back in and gets dropped again, only to nip right back up. Flair’s poke to the eye and chop put Eddie down again as the sun is starting to set.

Back up and some rapid fire shots rock Flair in the corner and Eddie rains down some right hands. Flair gets tossed outside and a running clothesline puts him on the floor again. Back in and Woman offers a distraction so Flair can get in a low blow, allowing Heenan to make a chili joke. Eddie’s sunset flip doesn’t work so he grabs a Figure Four to put Flair in some trouble. That’s broken up so Eddie runs up the ropes into a hurricanrana for two more.

Flair goes up and comes crashing back down to give Eddie another near fall. The second sunset flip attempt (thanks to Flair’s trunks coming down and a kick from the referee) is good for two so Eddie goes up top. The frog splash connects but Eddie bangs up his knee, meaning it’s time for the regular Flair selection. Flair grabs the Figure Four and, thanks to Woman grabbing Flair’s hands, Eddie is pinned at 14:29.

Rating: B. Like this wasn’t going to be good. Eddie was nowhere near the star he would become but you could see the abilities in the ring. You could see that Flair was giving him a lot here too in an effort to get over though, which was always one of Flair’s greatest strengths. This was one of the best things on the show so far, and it was nice to see both of them doing their thing so well.

Jimmy Hart (looking weird without glasses) and Giant are ready for Hollywood Hogan tonight. Hogan told the fans to stick it, but Giant is going to stick his hand around Hogan’s neck for a chokeslam. Giant has gotten miles better at promos in the last year.

Outsiders vs. Sting/Lex Luger

For reasons I still don’t quite get, Sting and Luger were champs until June but lost them to Harlem Heat, who traded the titles with the Steiners and Public Enemy (winning the titles three times in just over three months) instead of just having the Outsiders take the titles from Sting and Luger here. If nothing else, it would have given them a heck of a visual to end the show and the Outsiders winning the titles was inevitable anyway.

Anyway Hall (thanks to a game of Rock Paper Scissors) and Luger start things off with Hall working on a top wristlock. That’s broken up with straight power so Hall mocks Luger a bit, as only he can. Nash comes in and, after a bit of a tease, Luger brings Sting in as well. An exchange of shots to the face has Nash rocked a bit but Sting can’t slam him. More rights and lefts stagger Nash though and a poke to the eyes allows the slam.

Since it’s just a slam, Nash is right back up with Snake Eyes to take over and Hall comes back in for the corner clothesline. Heenan continues to sound bombed as he says he doesn’t care who wins here. Hall and Nash start taking turns beating on Sting, with Hall getting in the quality taunting that he does so well. A heck of a clothesline in the corner drops Sting and Nash comes in for the boot choke. Sting starts fighting back with that unique style of striking of his but it isn’t enough to get over for the tag. Instead it’s a collision to put Nash down, allowing Sting to fall down for the low blow.

Hall cuts off the tag, earning a COME ON HALL from Heenan. Tony: “WHAT???” Even Heenan doesn’t seem to get that one, which shouldn’t be that surprising. Sting backdrops his way out of the Outsider’s Edge attempt and the hot tag brings in Luger. Everything breaks down and Sting gets the Scorpion on Nash on the floor. The torture rack attempt knocks down referee Nick Patrick, who staggers right into Luger’s knee. A fast count gives Hall the pin at 14:34.

Rating: C-. The match was a bit dull but what hurts it more than anything else is the lack of stakes. I know it’s a big match for the Outsiders to get the pin over two of the biggest names in WCW, but how much better would this have been if the Outsiders had won the Tag Team Titles here? The match wasn’t exactly bad, though it could have been a lot more all things considered.

Heenan didn’t think the count was fast, as he still isn’t all there (throw in the slurred speech and I don’t think there is much doubt about what is going on).

WCW World Title: The Giant vs. Hollywood Hogan

Giant, with Jimmy Hart is defending, but first we need a long introduction about how amazing the bikers are, because motorcycles are cool or something. Hogan, the biggest heel in the world at the moment, gets the biggest face pop of the night. And they actually came here THREE MORE TIMES because Bischoff really, really loves motorcycles. It’s also fun to see Hogan still doing a lot of his face stuff as he doesn’t have the heel version entirely figured out yet.

Hogan hits the stall button to start and Heenan is loving the fact that he gets to rip on Hogan and have everyone admit that he’s right after all these years. Back in and Hogan hammers away in the corner to no effect so it’s time for more stalling on the floor. Hogan gets inside again and this time gets tossed right back to the floor as they’re firmly in first gear. A headlock is countered into a belly to back suplex to put Hogan on the floor again as it feels like we’ve been here before.

Giant wins a test of strength until Hogan fires off some kicks to the ribs, again earning a huge cheer from the bikers. The comeback is on and Giant gets him down to his knees as we are seven minutes into this thing. A top wristlock drives Hogan down but he grabs the hair to set up an armbar. The double arm crank goes on as it’s bizarre to see Hogan using all of these holds. Giant fights up so Hogan pulls him down by the hair. Back up again and three headbutts put Hogan on the floor.

That’s fine with Hogan, who pulls Giant outside and hammers away but Giant kicks him down back inside. A backbreaker gives Giant two but the big elbow misses. Hogan gets in some right hands…..and Giant Hulks Up, complete with shaking and the finger point. Giant hits a big boot and loads up the chokeslam but has to deal with the invading Outsiders. That’s enough for Hogan to get in a belt shot for the pin and the title at 14:53 in one of the most obvious results you’ll ever see (and that is not a bad thing).

Rating: D. Not only was the crowd all over the place (but the WCW guys got to ride motorcycles so it’s cool) but the match was a lot of Hogan stalling and very slow motion moves. Giant Hulking Up was a nice touch but that was about the only positive here. There was zero doubt about who was winning here and you absolutely had to put the title on Hogan, but it wasn’t an easy path to get there.

Post match the celebration is on, with Booty Man coming out in an NWO shirt with a birthday cake for Hogan (whose birthday was the next day but close enough). We hear about their 22 year friendship and Hogan says they have been like blood. Hogan talks about how he is going to beat Ric Flair at Clash of the Champions, mainly because Flair keeps mixing business with personal.

The NWO doesn’t do that though…..so “get him boys”. The beatdown is on and Hogan asks what he’ll do to Flair if he’ll do that to his brother. With that out of the way, we get the NWO spray painted on the title, which wound up being a pretty big deal. Of note: Giant laid there for about seven plus minutes while the NWO did their thing. Screw the legdrop, as that’s the most amazing belt shot ever.

Commentary is upset and scared of what is coming.

Roll credits, over a shot of a motorcycle of course.

Overall Rating: C+. The atmosphere was certainly unique, even if you discount the annoyance that was the bikers doing their own thing all night. The wrestling itself was pretty good for the most part and the two main event matches did enough of what they were supposed to. It’s not a great show but the post match event deal with the spray paint was certainly a big deal. Thrown in Heenan being bombed live on pay per view and there are worse options out there for a nearly three hour show. Oh and bikers, because motorcycles are the coolest things EVER. Eh Bischoff can explain it better than I can.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Bash At The Beach 1995: Uh….It Looks Nice!

IMG Credit: WWE

Bash at the Beach 1995
Date: July 16, 1995
Location: Huntington Beach, California
Attendance: 9,500
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan

This is a pretty unique show as it is literally on a beach (and bashing is implied). The wrestling might be hit or miss, but it’s one of the coolest visuals you’ll see and that’s the kind of thing that WWE never does these days. Mixing things up a lot can help and when you have a double main event of Ric Flair vs. Randy Savage and Hulk Hogan defending the World Title against Vader in a cage, we should be fine in the first place. Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at the main events, while also serving as a Slim Jim commercial.

Video on Meng, who has quite the match on this show as well. Meng is ready to destroy anyone in front of him to defend his honor.

Sting is all fired up to be in his hometown and his parents are in the front row. That’s a death sentence in the WWF but maybe he can survive here.

US Title: Sting vs. Meng

Sting is defending in a rematch from Great American Bash when he beat Meng in a tournament final to become champion. Meng has Colonel Robert Parker with him. Sting has to avoid the strikes to start and drives him into the corner with a test of strength. With that not working so well, they slug it out until Meng yells at him. Meng powers him into the corner and fires off some shoulders to the ribs. Choking ensues to put Sting down and a legdrop gets two.

Back up and they fight over a suplex as they’re in a cross between first and second gear. A shot to the face just annoys Meng and you can see the reality setting in for Sting. Meng knocks him down again but misses the middle rope splash, meaning it’s time for the early Scorpion Deathlock attempt. Sting actually gets it over but Parker’s distraction breaks it up because, as usual, Sting is really stupid.

The distraction lets Meng hit some backbreakers, followed by a knee in the back while pulling on the legs. That’s switched into the abdominal stretch but Sting fights up and gets two off a sunset flip. A double knockdown gives us a bit of a breather until Meng grabs something like a Boston crab. Heenan: “But we’re not near Boston so it’s just a crab.”

Sting makes the rope and comes back with a belly to back suplex to start the comeback. A chop block into a Thesz press gets two, followed by a middle rope spinning crossbody for the same. The Stinger Splash is kicked out of the air though and Meng hits the middle rope splash for two. Back up and Meng misses a running kick to the face, allowing Sting to grab a quick rollup for the pin at 15:31.

Rating: C. Sting knows how to fight a monster and that’s what he had going on here. It wasn’t exactly a great match and I’m not sure how much drama there was over the idea of Meng winning the title, but Sting slaying a monster is going to work every time. It’s almost weird to see Sting as a midcard guy, but he’s going to bring credibility to the title and that’s a good idea.

Post match Meng jumps him again but here’s Road Warrior Hawk for the save as Tony and Bobby argue about the speed of the count.

Jimmy Hart says every wrestling magazine is talking about the Renegade (No Jimmy, they’re not. For those of you lucky enough to not remember, Renegade was as blatant of a ripoff character as you could get, looking and moving like the Ultimate Warrior, with Hulk Hogan even calling him the ULTIMATE surprise when he debuted. The problem was he made Warrior look like Lou Thesz, turning it into one of the more infamously terrible WCW ideas, if that is possible.), who says Hart has programmed him to terminate on sight. Gene Okerlund thinks the California heat has gotten to them.

TV Title: Paul Orndorff vs. Renegade

Renegade is defending and they start fast with Orndorff knocking him down early. A knee to the ribs sets up a knee to the face but Orndorff stops to yell at Hart. That means Renegade can get a boot up to stop Orndoff coming off the top (with the sole purpose of diving into a raised boot) and hit a clothesline to the floor. Tony says that could get some sand on Orndorff’s skin, with Heenan saying it could also break his ankle. These two have very different perspectives on injury risks.

Renegade pulls him back in by the head and then drops Orndorff face first on the mat. We hit the headlock and even that looks awkward, as Renegade just does not look comfortable out there. A running dropkick sends Orndorff outside again and this time it’s a handful of sand to blind Renegade. Some shots to the face keep Renegade in trouble and Orndorff hits hits own dropkick (Tony: “And that was a good one fans.”).

The piledriver is broken up with a backdrop though and the comeback is on, including another awful dropkick. There’s a powerslam but Renegade isn’t sure what to do next so Orndorff throws him outside instead. Back in and Renegade reverses a belly to back suplex into one of his own for the pin to retain at 6:08. Orndorff’s shoulder may have been up but anything to get out of here is a good idea at this point.

Rating: D-. I’ve liked Orndorff more after I watch him over the years but DANG he was fighting a losing battle here. At the end of the day, there was no reason for Renegade to be here other than he looked like Ultimate Warrior. The match was horrible because Renegade is so bad and there is no way around it. This shouldn’t have been on pay per view, but that has never stopped WCW before.

Post match Orndorff gives him the piledriver but Renegade pops up and hits a high crossbody.

We see how Kamala was introduced to the Dungeon of Doom as Taskmaster’s latest soldier against Hulk Hogan. Apparently he has walked the Sahara and climbed Mt. Kilimanjaro. Yet he still can’t find shoes.

Jim Duggan is ready for Kamala because it’s no more Mr. Nice Guy. Have we flashed back to Mid-South?

Jim Duggan vs. Kamala

Kamala, despite being a savage, knows to hide in the ropes when Duggan swings the 2×4 around. Duggan slugs away to start but can’t get him down. A big shot has Kamala’s arms shaking and a big right hand finally puts him down. The USA chant only works so well this time so Kevin Sullivan points to Duggan and shouts HULKAMANIA, which is enough to send Kamala over the edge.

Choking sets up a bearhug but Duggan uses the power of stomping on bare toes for the break. Kamala goes with the chest claw (as stupid as it sounds) but Duggan is right back with a slam. Duggan goes after Sullivan though, allowing Zodiac to come in with Kamala’s mask to knock Duggan silly and give Kamala the pin at 6:06.

Rating: D. This was a way to introduce Kamala but that makes you realize that you are having to meet Kamala in 1995. I’m not sure how good of an idea that is, but at the same time I’m one of the few who liked the Dungeon of Doom. This stuff felt so out of place and Duggan as one of Hogan’s proxy fighters wasn’t quite enough to make a lot of people care. It would make for a good indy match, but not exactly on a major pay per view.

Randy Savage (I want that Slim Jim shirt) is ready to end things with Ric Flair and wants those lifeguards to keep Ric Flair in person. He’s from Florida and we’re in California but the beach is what matters.

Diamond Dallas Page vs. Dave Sullivan

Page has Max Muscle (I think you can figure him out) and Kimberly (his pretty manager) with him. Dave Sullivan (with Ralph the Rabbit) is Kevin’s nitwit brother and one of the all time worst wrestlers to be on a big stage. A kid gives Kimberly some flowers so Page destroys them, because he’s quite the jealous guy (as he should be because he doesn’t have much going for himself, outside of winning $13 million in a Bingo game, because WCW was weird).

That’s enough to have Sullivan run to the ring and jump Page as the beating is on early. An atomic drop into a running clothesline keeps Page in trouble but Sullivan stops to wave at Kimberly). Page gets in a few cheap shots but charges into the bearhug. That’s broken up as well so Dave hammers away with his right hand/clothesline offense. The inverted bearhug (Dave lifts him up for a piledriver and squeezes, making it an inverted waistlock instead of a bearhug) goes on but Max gets on the apron for a distraction, allowing Page to hit the Diamond Cutter for the pin at 4:22.

Rating: D. Yeah what were you expecting here? Dave Sullivan is one of the worst mainstream performers you’ll see in recorded history and you could see that on display here. It doesn’t help that this was before Page got good, but he was certainly trying and improving, eventually setting up one of the most improbable main event runs of all time. Anyway, horrible match, but when you’re flat out copying George Steele/Randy Savage/Elizabeth, what are you expecting?

Sister Sherri says she and Harlem Heat are ready for the Blue Bloods and the Nasty Boys in the triangle match. Harlem Heat is ready too and rant accordingly. This is back when a triple threat was a pretty rare concept so there is some actual intrigue here.

Tag Team Titles: Blue Bloods vs. Nasty Boys vs. Harlem Heat

Harlem Heat is defending, the Blue Bloods are Robert (Bobby Eaton)/Steven (William) Regal and this has some weird rules. There is a coin toss to determine which teams start and it’s one fall to a finish, but you can be eliminated via DQ and turn it into a regular tag match. In one of the most “because WCW” moments in recent memory, they all flip the coins, but they have to do it again because they’re all heads. So yes, WCW couldn’t manage to rig/lie about A COIN TOSS WHERE YOU DON’T SEE THE COINS without having to try it again.

Booker and Knobbs start but it’s a brawl in just a few seconds because of course it is. Regal takes the Pit Stop and sells it as only he can, falling all the way outside. There’s another to send Eaton outside again and we settle down to Booker kicking Knobbs in the face. Regal tags himself in and stomps on Booker, who takes him down without much effort. The spinning kick to the face keeps Regal in trouble and it’s Eaton coming in, only to get backdropped down.

It’s off to Sags for a legdrop between the legs but Booker is up to forearm Regal as the fast tags continue. Tony points out the lack of logic in tagging another team in as the Nastys hit a double shoulder for two on Booker. Regal comes in to strike away on Stevie but then tags Sags in, causing Heenan to say the Blue Bloods don’t understand the match.

The Blue Bloods start taking turns on Stevie but again Regal tags Knobbs in, completely missing the point. Knobbs hits a splash for two with Regal making the save, earning some rarely deserved praise from Tony. Booker comes back in for a knee to Knobbs and then hands it right back to Stevie for a knee of his own. The Blue Bloods take over on Knobbs again as Heenan gets confused on the rules again.

Stevie gets to choke on Knobbs in the corner but Regal tags himself in to break up the ax kick from Booker. Knobbs sits down on Regal’s chest to break up the sunset flip attempt and everything breaks down again. Booker gets backdropped onto Regal and Knobbs adds a splash to give Sags the pin….on Booker, who is on Regal, meaning Harlem Heat retains at 13:09.

Rating: D+. They were trying something different here but at the end of the day, the teams seemed to get confused by the rules here and it was a big mess as a result. That being said, the ending was creative and I’ll take that over something that is done over and over again. They really needed to tighten up on the execution to make it work, but there was only so much you were going to be able to do with these three teams all at once.

Post match Sherri yells about how great Harlem Heat is and the team agrees. They aren’t worried about Bunkhouse Buck and Dick Slater either.

Commentary talks about the upcoming match while everything is set up.

Ric Flair talks about how Elizabeth left Savage for him (Gene: “Did she go to Space Mountain?”) and now it’s time for Savage to understand what is going on (as we copy another WWF story). Flair is ready to make the girls in California cry again.

Some Baywatch women come to the ring so Heenan gets on his chair for a better look.

Ric Flair vs. Randy Savage

This is a Lifeguard match, meaning Lumberjack. You can tell Savage is serious here because he’s throwing out Slim Jims. Savage punches him down to start and hammers away as commentary keeps talking about Savage’s dad being in attendance. Flair gets sent outside and the lumberjacks are already getting in a fight over throwing him back in. An atomic drop out of the corner lets Flair chop away before sending Savage outside. The same kind of shoving match ensues but Savage sends him into the buckle a few times back inside.

The Flair Flip into the corner is enough for a trip to the floor but Flair is back inside in a hurry. Savage is sent to the apron, where he suplexes Flair over the top and back outside (near the sand for a change, which Tony thinks could be a problem). Back in again and Flair gets in a thumb to the eye, setting up an elbow to the face. The sleeper goes on until Savage sends him into the corner for the break.

Flair sends him outside for a few cheap shots and it’s time to go for the leg. To really mix it up, Flair grabs the leg, goes to the middle rope, and flips forward to snap the leg (never seen him do it before or since). It’s enough to set up the Figure Four with Savage finally managing to turn it over. Flair gets two off a suplex but Savage is right back with right hands in the corner. Savage sends him outside with the lifeguards having to catch Flair from trying to escape.

There’s the top rope ax handle to the head but Savage has to knock Arn Anderson off the apron. Flair gets sent over the top and the referee is distracted, allowing Arn to come in with the DDT. That’s good for two, as is Savage’s backslide. Flair is slammed off the top and there’s another ax handle to the head. Savage heads up top again and does the fingers in the air (with the huge crowd and ocean behind him for a REALLY cool visual) for the elbow and the clean pin at 13:57.

Rating: B-. Savage vs. Flair is always worth a look but this was a pretty paint by numbers version of the match. The lumberjacks didn’t do much of anything aside from the Arn DDT, making it more of a gimmick than anyway else. It felt big because of who was in it, but there are roughly 14 better versions of this match available.

Post match Savage hugs one of the Baywatch women, who manages to not be physically ill on camera.

Video on Vader’s Road Kill Tour, which has involved him destroying everyone on the way to a cage match against Hulk Hogan here. More paint by numbers stuff, but it’s Hogan vs. a monster in a cage. Why mess with what works?

Vader breaks various things and promises to show Hogan who the man is, because Vader fears nothing. While Hogan was out there tanning on the beach, Vader was growing up in the toughest parts of Los Angeles and there is nowhere for Hogan to hide. Vader was extra fired up here.

Commentary hypes up the main event, with Tony calling Heenan a blathering idiot.

Video on Collision In Korea, which is almost hard to fathom these days.

Hulk Hogan, with Jimmy Hart and Dennis Rodman, talks about how they were looking for people to beat up last night. Now it’s time to make Woodstock look like a backyard barbecue while he throws Vader over the top of the cage. Uh, you can win by escape here Hulk. Rodman is going to be guarding the cage door.

WCW World Title: Vader vs. Hulk Hogan

Hogan is defending in a cage and I’ll never not be a bit disturbed by Vader’s helmet. It’s pin/submission/escape to win here. Hogan goes right for him to start and the right hands in the corner have Vader in early trouble. The fans are into the counting here as Hogan can’t elbow him down. They both block rams into the cage and slug it out with Vader getting the better of things and sending him into the steel first.

Hogan sends him face first into the big helmet and then puts it on (Blasphemous!) for a disturbing visual. With that nonsense out of the way, Hogan rips at his face, only to be sent into the cage. The Vader Bomb gets no cover so Vader does it again for the near fall. There’s another ram into the cage and a release suplex drops Hogan again. Vader goes for the door but gets sent into the cage, only to knee Hogan in the head. The top rope backsplash (that’s a new one) misses but Hogan falls down on a slam attempt to give Vader two.

The chinlock goes on and Jimmy Hart instantly goes into cheerleader mode, as he is known to do. Hogan fights up and hits the slam, only to hurt his back. Vader’s middle rope splash gets two and it’s time to Hulk Up. Hogan isn’t having any of these forearms to the back or a ram to the cage, as Heenan is all “oh here we go again”. Vader is sent into the cage over and over and it’s a big boot….as Kevin Sullivan and Zodiac come out. Rodman dispatches them in a hurry as Hogan drops a pair of legs. That’s not enough for Hogan to escape (oh come on) so Hogan knocks him off the top and escapes at 13:13.

Rating: C-. This was as by the book of a Hogan cage match as you were going to get and there was absolutely no drama to the whole thing. Hogan beating a giant is one thing but could they at least make you believe the title was in the slightest bit of jeopardy? That being said, there is a reason that this formula worked so well for so long and the match wasn’t horrible, with the unique setting helping a lot.

Heenan is disgusted as the show ends….in theory at least, as Flair comes into the ring to yell at Vader. Tony isn’t sure if we’re still on the air as Arn Anderson has to come int o save Flair. Vader chases them both off without much trouble and shouts that Flair needs to stay out of his business.

Commentary recaps the cage match and post match shenanigans to wrap things up.

Roll credits.

Overall Rating: D. The two main events were upgrades, but there is a reason that this is such a dark period for WCW. The wrestling wasn’t very good, the stories were about as basic as you could get, and nothing is worth seeing. At least the visual was really cool though as going somewhere else for a special show like this does help. It was clear that they needed to change something up here though as this was a really rough one to sit through.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Fall Brawl 1993: I’m As Shocked As You Are

This is a rather old one so I apologize in advance for the quality.

IMG Credit: WWE

 

Fall Brawl 1993
Date: September 19, 1993
Location: Astro Arena, Houston, Texas
Attendance: 6,000
Commentators: Jesse Ventura, Tony Schiavone

This is from the awful period for WCW when they were borderline unwatchable. This is a WarGames show and also has a thirty minute Rude vs. Flair match for the International Title (which is the parody of the NWA Title that I’ve gone over a dozen times and I’m sure I’ll do again here. I really don’t want to do this one so let’s get to it.

The opening video is about Fall and how kids go back to school and all that jazz. Everything isn’t ok though as WCW is invading Houston! There’s really no connection there but whatever.

It’s weird to see a show from WCW in Texas. Tony and Jesse introduce Eric who introduces our first match.

TV Title: Steven Regal vs. Ricky Steamboat

Yes it’s that Regal. I still can’t get over the idea that his butler is Bill Dundee. We have the double ring setup as tonight it’s WarGames of course. They’ll be alternating back and forth. The first match is in ring one. Dragon has the scales and such here which is odd looking but he’s Ricky Steamboat so who can argue?

Buffer introduces Regal as being very dapper. There’s something funny about that name. Oh and I almost forgot: this is the first WCW show when they’re officially out of the NWA and are completely free. Steamboat has bad ribs from a beating last night by Regal on Saturday Night.

Speaking of Saturday Night, this is a very interesting show because the results for all the big matches had been spoiled. This is one of the major reasons why the NWA was mad and ultimately eliminated. WCW would tape MONTHS of shows in advance, giving away storylines to anyone at the tapings. For instance, later on there’s a title change and a new manager debuts. Both were known almost a month prior to them occurring.

Now think about why this is a problem. First and foremost, people know about the storylines months in advance. Second though, think about how the wrestlers are being treated. Look at Miz today as WWE Champion. Apparently his reign was supposed to be shorter but he has impressed management so much that they’re giving him a longer reign. Now look at this version of WCW. With the title changes set in stone for months down the road, why would you work hard, knowing that no matter what you do, the title changes have already happened? What’s the incentive to work harder? See the problems here?

Anyway, on to the match. Apparently Regal hurt Steamboat with an umbrella. Regal tries to go after the ribs so Ricky has to fight defensively for the majority of the opening. Off to the ramp for a bit as they try to defend Steamboat throwing him over the top to the ramp rather than to the floor. Also, shouldn’t throwing someone over the top to the ring also be a DQ?

Regal uses simple psychology here by going after the injured ribs like anyone with a brain would do. That’s the basic definition of ring psychology: why would a person do just what they did? If you were in a real fight and you knew the other guy had an injury, you would go after it right? It makes sense to, which means it’s good psychology here. Steamboat chops away in the corner and we get some reversals on Irish whips resulting in Regal’s arm hitting the buckle.

Steamboat works on the arm, again using psychology. Old guys know basic thoughts. Regal gets what appeared to be a thumb to the eye and we get an unheard of STEAMBOAT SUCKS chant. What the heck??? Steamboat plays possum and gets a leg drag but uses his leg to take Steamboat over. It’s hard to describe but imagine an arm drag by Steamboat but Steamboat uses his leg to get it over.

Back to the arm and shoulder and then up for the cross body. Steamboat’s ribs are hurt by the move though and he can’t cover. You can tell the camera side is empty as they never get close to showing it. It’s a WCW trademark and you can tell why they do it because at I think Beach Blast 93 we saw the other side and it was completely empty. Regal does the same short arm scissors lift that Bulldog famously did to Shawn but he can’t break the hold.

I was right about the crowd as they caught a quick shot of part of it. It must be Halloween because everyone is wearing an empty seat costume. Off to a chinlock by Regal. This has been 98% mat wrestling so far. It’s not incredibly interesting but it’s very technically sound of course. Off to a body vice by Regal which is a perfect move for him to use here. When did Regal start using power moves though?

Modified surfboard by Regal where he leans back with it but leaves Steamboat on the mat for a bit and just pulls on the arms. He pulls back a bit and has Steamboat more or less on his knees to give you a visual. Regal gets a nice butterfly suplex for two as we alter the style a bit. Steamboat counters into a slingshot and gets a one count while he’s setting up for it. I guess that’s a cover of some sort?

Steamboat can’t slam him and Regal falls on him for two. Ventura says Ricky should get himself disqualified. Regal tries a Tombstone but gets reversed into one of the softest Tombstones I’ve ever seen. You can hear the crowd just die on it’s impact. Steamboat counters a belly to back into an O’Connor Roll for two. Steamboat goes up and hits the cross body but hurts his ribs again. PSYCHOLOGY BABY! Ricky skins the cat but Sir William (manager) DRILLS him in the head with the umbrella so a German suplex gives Regal the TV Title.

Rating: B-. This was incredibly technical which makes things rather boring. That being said it’s still very good as both guys worked incredibly well of course. The fans hated it though which is a problem as an opener is supposed to make a crowd get into a show. Good stuff though, but 17 minutes was probably too long here.

Eric talks to the Nasty Boys who say they have a big secret, which also was spoiled weeks if not months ago by the TV tapings. Knobbs says they’ll win the tag titles with a top rope bulldog. That’s different if nothing else, saying how they’ll win it.

Big Sky vs. Charlie Norris

Big Sky is more famous as an actor, most known as being Sabretooth in the first X-Men movie. Norris is an Indian. Also Sky (who looks a bit like Jericho but about a foot taller) played Michael Myers in the Halloween remakes. In case you can’t tell, this match sucks right off the bat due to a lack of talent from both guys. The fans want Flair and I can’t blame them a bit.

Norris, also a big guy, hooks an armbar. The fans shift to a boring chant and again I can’t blame them a bit. Sky gets a chokeslam and won’t cover. A legdrop gets no cover as he chokes away instead. Middle rope knee drop misses and Norris does a war dance and chops away. Bicycle kick ends this to a pop, I’d assume because it’s over.

Rating: D-. Who thought this would be a good match? I want them shot. Boring stuff here with neither guy being any good at all. This is the kind of stuff that WCW in this era would get bashed for and I can’t say I blame them at all. Oh well, at least Sky would have some decent movie roles. Norris just sucked and sucked hard.

A guy named Scott Dunlap, a backstage interviewer with I kid you now, cerebral palsy, talks to Bulldog who talks about his opponents tonight in WarGames. How do you comment on a guy with cerebral palsy?

Paul Orndorff/The Equalizer vs. 2 Cold Scorpio/Marcus Bagwell

Equalizer is better known as Dave “Evad” Sullivan and is horrible. Orndorff looks like he’d rather be shot than be here. Bagwell is rookie of the year for like the 5th year running somehow. This is thrown together match and they say how it’s added on. Ventura talks about being in Demolition Man with Wesley Snipes which is kind of cool. Scorpio’s eyes are bugging out of his head of course. He and Bagwell are coming for the titles apparently.

They have matching tights that are purple and gold here, making them apparently Laker enthusiasts. Bagwell and Equalizer start us off and Bagwell gives him a pelvic thrust. You always kind of wonder about him. Both good guys finally get Equalizer down with a double dropkick. Equalizer almost hits Jesse on his way to the floor. You can hear a director say to keep the other side off camera. That’s too funny.

Scorpio gets beaten down by Orndorff as momentum changes. The best definition I can give you of Scorpio is a Cruiserweight in a nearly heavyweight’s body. He was insane and could move like few others ever but had the size to not look like a joke. Ornforff hammers away on Bagwell but gets caught in a floatover suplex for two. Bagwell hits the ropes but Equalizer pulls the top rope down to send him over, where Marcus might have hurt his knee.

Equalizer slams him on the floor and oddly enough, despite them being maybe two feet (literally) away from Jesse, he watches on the monitor instead of just turning his head. Not saying it’s a bad thing but just odd. We hit the chinlock with Equalizer holding Bagwell for awhile. He gets out and a crucifix gets one. As Orndorff has a bear hug on, Tony says Fall Brawl is underway! You know, 45 minutes into the show!

Cold tag to Scorpio who beats up Equalizer and Orndorff because he’s awesome. Cross body gets two on Equalizer. Everything breaks down and the Laker team…screws up as Bagwell whips in Equalizer but he clotheslines Scorpio. Nice job guys. In a pretty good ending, Orndorff hits Equalizer with a knee but it knocks him right into position for the 450, but it wasn’t contrived for once.

Rating: D. Oh man this was bad. There was ZERO point to this and no one cared. I mean NO ONE cared. I know it was thrown on, but dude can you at least give us a match that is decent? I rarely complain about bonus wrestling but this is a case where I can certainly do that. Awful match but Scorpio keeps it from failing.

Heels beat them down post match.

Regal addresses the crowd, saying he’s better than they are. There’s something about British heels that is perfectly hateable.

Shanghai Pierce vs. Ice Train

Pierce has Tex Slazenger with him. They would move to the WWF in about a year and become the Godwins. Ice Train is more or less Big Zeke but with even less talent. I always liked him for some reason. Oh and Pierce is in a mask. They’re from Texas but are being booed anyway which is appropriate somehow. Power vs. power here with Train being the stronger of the two.

This is one of the least interesting matches I’ve seen in a very long time. Basically imagine every power vs. power cliché you can think of and add in some heel lariats and you more or less have the entire match. The heels try to use a bullrope but he runs right through it and a bad powerslam ends it. This was nothing. No rating as I have nothing to say about it at all. Let that sink in for a bit.

Tag Titles: Nasty Boys vs. Arn Anderson/Paul Roma

Ok let’s clear up a few things here. First of all, Anderson and Roma (Horsemen here) are faces. The Nasty Boys are challenging them and have no manager coming into the match. The next FOUR MONTHS (in other words, giving away the results of the next THREE PPVs) have already been taped. At those tapings, Roma is a heel and not a Horseman, the Nasty Boys are tag team champions and they have Missy Hyatt as a manager. See what WCW was like back in the day?

Naturally Missy comes out with them and NO ONE is surprised. Missy was famous for having a big rack and that’s about it. Naturally, that’s all Tony and Jesse talk about. We even get big match intros here. Roma and Knobbs start us off as Jesse looks at Missy a lot. Roma gets in a right hand and Brian bails. Back in and the fans don’t seem all that interested.

Naturally the announcers talk about Missy and make sex jokes. Roma hits both guys with powerslams and the Horsemen stand tall. There’s money on the floor for some reason. I guess Missy has a good night the previous night? Sags wants Anderson and apparently that’s enough to warrant a Horsemen tag. Anderson works on his knee and then it’s back off to Roma. What did I do to deserve this?

The fans chant take it off which Tony tries to say is them giving Missy a hard time. Just keep telling yourself that dude. Now they think she’s a crack ****e. Dang I didn’t realize ECW had come to Houston yet. Wishbone split to Knobbs as the Horsemen dominate. They work on the knee of Knobbs who has been in there about 90% of the match so far. The fans say take it off.

Hey while we’re in the middle of a submission hold let’s go to the crowd to see a Bevis and Butthead sign. Tony wants to know what Missy can offer as far as a manager. Jesse: “I imagine she can put you in a few holds.” The Nasties take over and it’s a reverse chinlock. Off to Sags who locks in a reverse chinlock of his own. The fans chant Porky Pig. Now let’s talk about Houston sports because we’re bored.

Jesse REALLY doesn’t like Texas or Texicans. Now Brian gets a third straight reverse chinlock. Electric chair is attempted by Roma but he can’t get him up so it’s reverse chinlock #4. They redo the counter and it works this time. Tony tries to tell us that Roma is brand new to wrestling as I guess we’re not supposed to remember his six years in the WWF.

Anderson comes in and gets knocked over the top and out to the floor. With the referee distracted Sags pops Anderson with a chair. Now it’s off to revolving abdominal stretches. We even get a third one as Arn reverses Knobbs. And never mind as Sags drills him to keep control. Other than those few chanting fans the crowd is DEAD. I always see the Walking Dead title when I type dead in all caps.

Front facelock now but Anderson tags. Naturally the referee didn’t see it. The easiest heat move in the world can’t get a bit of heat at all. That says a lot. Bearhug goes on so Anderson bites Knobbs to break it up. I’d recommend some Listerine. Suplex by Sags keeps Anderson down. Ah there’s the bearhug from Sags as well. Good to see him emulating the ring general that is Brian Knobs.

Anderson gets an elbow shot in but STILL can’t make the tag. There’s the Porky chant again. Arn rams both of their heads into the mat which Jesse says causes an eruption. If that’s an eruption then I’d barely be able to hear a pop. Roma in now and Tony says a double noggin knocker is a double coconut.

The Nasties fight back and set for the aforementioned bulldog off the top but Arn breaks it up and a victory roll gets two. Roma hits his Swan Dive finisher but Sags drops an elbow on him from the top and Knobbs gets the pin. I guess when Anderson ran right past his unconscious partner being covered he didn’t think it was worthy of breaking up.

Rating: D. This was TWENTY FOUR MINUTES LONG. Anderson is great and Roma is bad but passable, but dude, the Nasty Boys do not belong in any match going over ten minutes ever. This was also completely predictable due to the tapings that were all well known beforehand. Boring match though.

If you’re interested in the show itself, I’d recommend skipping about two pages or so as it’s all analysis and backstory.

Video on Cactus Jack and his amnesia. Oh boy it’s this angle. Back in April, Cactus had beaten Vader, then world champion, by countout on Saturday Night (the top show at the time). Vader demanded a rematch the next week and got it. In this (awesome, much like the previous one) match, Vader pulled the padding back on the floor and powerbombed Foley on the concrete, legitimately injuring him to the point where his left foot was numb for a few days. Oh and Cactus had a bag that I don’t think was ever explained but he was obsessed with it. It was tiny and couldn’t hold much but he was nuts about it.

WCW decided to make an angle out of his legit concussion (notice how Bischoff seems to like doing that) and had him institutionalized due to insanity/amnesia. He escaped and then disappeared. Yes, we had entered into a comedy angle. WCW dispatched a “reporter” to try to find him as he was “Lost in Cleveland.” They talked to his wife (played by his wife) and his kids (played by actors) and no one knew where he was. This went on for weeks if not months. Harley Race (Vader’s manager) had the bag and said that Jack was gone.

They finally found Jack living on the streets, thinking he was a pirate and having a gang of kids/young adults that followed him around and listened to his “wise teachings.” His wife came up to him and he said he didn’t know her and this was all supposed to be tongue in cheek comedy. The only interesting part of this was seeing Foley clean shaven. Race started getting presents, like a small cactus.

Jack FINALLY returned four months after getting attacked and beat the heck out of Vader. This led to a bounty deal and a very white guy playing a Japanese guy named Yoshi Kwan coming after Jack which is the match tonight. In case you couldn’t guess, this was one of the worst angles in wrestling history and is still occasionally referenced today as a bad idea. In Foley’s first book, he described it as a surefire moneymaking feud (which it was) was a problem that WCW executives had to solve immediately.

We get a promo from Foley, telling us it was all a plan and that he was never really suffering from amnesia and that he’s coming for Vader. He has some real bad intentions for him and it’s time for Vader to face reality. This is all done outside in front of some building promotion a Smashing Pumpkins concert. This is an easy promo to describe: awesome. From late 93 to early 95, Foley was untouchable on the mic. Go find some of his promos from this era and takes notes, because they are some of the best I’ve ever seen.

Since I love Foley and this show is absolutely awful and I don’t want to watch anymore of it, let’s take a look at why this promo was great. First off, this promo is two minutes and two seconds long (we’ll say two minutes as some of that is Foley looking into the camera after saying Bang Bang). He doesn’t have a lot of time to work with here so he has to get things done and in a hurry.

First thing we see is Foley outside holding a piece of wood and throwing it on a pile of scrap, saying he was on a street like this just a week ago. Immediately he ties what he’s saying into him being on the streets for the last few months as a bit of continuity. Behind him is a bunch of fliers for a Smashing Pumpkins concert. This doesn’t add much, but you could say it feels more realistic than being in front of a big sign that says WCW.

In the first 30 seconds he talks about how someone (again, going for realism so he doesn’t say a name) asked him if he really lost his memory, if that was really his wife and if that was really his son. He says no to all of these, but the final question is whether or not anyone believed he lost his mind, to which he shouts YES. He explains the last few months worth of stories, saying they weren’t real and that he had a plan.

Jack says that there were two people that believed it, and they were Big Van Vader and Harley Race. What he tells us with that line is “yes, I know the promos were stupid, but there was a point to them”, thereby saying I’m sorry for how bad they were, but it was intentional and ties it into his enemies. He says you don’t win the world championship by being an idiot. As he says this he points to himself, saying that HE was being an idiot, or at least pretending to be. He also states his ultimate goal here. This has all been done in the span of 40 seconds so far.

He says that they believed it because they wanted to, not because it’s realistic (again, tying things back into the whole everyone knew it was fake, but they’re different). Jack talks about how Vader is a big game hunter and over his wall he has the ribs of Sting, the shoulder of Ron Simmons, the back of Joe Thurman (jobber Vader injured) and the neck of Nikita Koloff. Here he reminds the audience that Vader has a long history of hurting big name stars (and Thurman).

There was a place missing over the fireplace though, which was where he wanted the head of Cactus Jack. Jack identifies himself as the one that got away, which would mean Vader, as a hunter like he mentioned earlier, would want him there no matter what. But Vader can’t have him, even though he believes he captured him by putting him on the shelf. All that did was give Cactus time for thoughts to brew like a bag of tea.

The tea line sounds weird, but Foley immediately ties it together by saying this isn’t sipping tea but rather brutali-tea and a heavy dose of reali-tea. While this is indeed corny, it ties the last line together and the reality part ties on with the concept of Vader wanting to believe something that isn’t real. We’re in the home stretch now so it’s time to play up the anger.

Jack goes on to say that if they can arrest him for the thoughts that are going through his mind then get a rope and hang him right here. He has some sick thoughts and they all center around him changing Vader’s world like Vader changed him. Cactus finishes by saying he’s worse than any specter, ghoul or ghost (remember the match is at Halloween Havoc) than Vader can imagine. BANG BANG!

To summarize, in two minutes Jack has told us what happened the last few months, why he did it, how it ties into Vader and Race, his ultimate goal, and what his next step is. He ties this together with the tea thing and it accomplishes all these things, all while in front of a unique backdrop and in only two minutes. Couple this with great emotion and just the right volume by Jack on every word and you have a great promo.

Yoshi Kwan vs. Cactus Jack

I’m not expecting this to go long. Kwan is an indy guy named Chris Champion that is very white but is allegedly from Japan here to the point where it’s just stupid looking. Crowd pops fairly well for Jack all things considered. Cactus destroys him to start and it’s a Cactus Clothesline to take us to the floor. Cactus keeps trying to get the bag back from Race and it ultimately gets him in trouble.

They change rings a few times with Kwan controlling for the most part here. Kwan unleashes the kicks which are as generic as you could ask them to be. Bicycle kick is caught and it’s forearms for Jack. Race tries to get involved but gets drilled by Kwan by accident. Double Arm DDT beats Kwan without really breaking a sweat. Jack gets the bag back post match.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t about winning or anything and I’m really not sure what the point of Kwan was. He more or less just showed up one day and was Race’s bounty dude. I’m pretty sure he was gone after this. The point of this was that it set up Vader vs. Cactus which was a great match indeed.

We recap Rude vs. Flair which started on Flair’s interview segment A Flair for the Gold. Rude kissed Flair’s maid Fifi and she wasn’t thrilled. Rude drilled him with the big gold belt and gave him the Rude Awakening to set this up.

WCW International Title: Rick Rude vs. Ric Flair

Without going into the story AGAIN, it’s the NWA Title without the NWA name or lineage and it’s more or less a parody of the NWA and it would be merged with the WCW Title the following year. Read up about it in one of the other 29 times I’ve explained it. If you haven’t seen Rude in WCW and only know of his initial WWF run, it’s COMPLETELY different as Rude was a killer here instead of a comedy joke.

Having a personal maid is just awesome. Rude says when he leaves he’ll have Flair’s reputation, his title, and his woman, revealing Fifi on his tights. I love that bit. Ventura starts off on his anti-women rants, saying the housework Fifi does is what women should be doing everywhere. They fight over a top wristlock which Rude of course loses. Tony warns Jesse that the sound woman might cut his mic off. That would be hilarious actually.

Flair goes for the knee early and the Figure Four is on maybe two minutes in! Rude gets to the ropes but dang that was surprising. To shock me some more, Flair comes off the top AND HITS THE PUNCH! Yes, he actually didn’t get slammed off! Where’s my medicine when I need it? Flair hooks a wristlock and Jesse thinks women should be barefoot and pregnant. THEY CUT HIS MIC OFF!!!!! Jesse steals Tony’s and says no one cuts him off. That was awesome!

He’s back on and goes on a rant about Sara Lee (the name of the sound director) about how he’s switching to Betty Crocker now. That was hilarious and has breathed some much needed life into this show. Tony references a European tour and a show in Germany, which is where Cactus infamously lost his ear. Also there was a world title trade between Sting and Vader where Sting held the title for about three days.

Flair uncharacteristically works on Rude’s arm instead of the leg, but I guess the idea is take away the power game which is logical. Rude takes over for a bit but rams his shoulder into the buckle by mistake and it’s back to the arm. Rude can’t slam Flair to tell you how bad the arm is. Somewhere about the 8th arm hold they go over the top and out to the floor. Tony: “There’s Fifi, trying to help Flair get up.” Jesse: “No way I’m touching that one.” I love those not very subtle lines.

Rude rams Flair into the apron and gets a suplex for two. He’s starting to get the arm back now. And now it’s a reverse chinlock by Rude as I’m guessing he was watching that Nasty Boys match earlier. This match has been going about 13 minutes so far and probably 8 or 9 has been in holds. Rude lets him up and gets a clothesline off the top and a press slam. Out to the floor again and Rude poses in the ring for a bit.

Hey let’s go with a bearhug instead of doing something interesting! It goes to the mat and Flair rolls over and actually gets a cover while in a bearhug. Aren’t Rude’s shoulders up? Flair charges at Rude but gets caught in a Hot Shot to set up the Flair Flop. A fist from the top by Rude gets some yelling at Fifi. Another shot has Flair reeling. Fifi’s nose looks like Voldermort’s.

Rude goes for a third shot from the top but Flair is playing possum. Belly to back suplex gives Flair the momentum. Butterfly suplex gets two. Flair goes off on Rude in the corner and it’s all Naitch. And never mind that as he eats knees in the corner. Rude gets a DDT for two. Flair counters the Rude Awakening into one of his own for two. Flair grabs the leg and….goes up with it? He flips forward to snap the leg even more. I’ve never seen him do that before.

Flair sets for the Figure Four but Rude kicks him off. More leg work but Rude gets a rollup to counter the hold again. That only gets two though. Flair sends him to the floor and we get a quick shot of the camera side. There are maybe 8 rows of fans and that’s it. Wow that almost ROH levels of attendance. Not saying it’s bad for ROH but for the second biggest company in the world on PPV, that’s anemic.

Flair goes up and hits the shot from the top to the floor as he controls again. As good as this may sound, it’s nowhere near that entertaining actually. Rude counters and we get a Flair Flip and Ric can’t hit a third shot off the top. Rude gets a top rope punch for a long two. Fifi finally slaps Rude so he kisses her. He brings her into the ring and Flair destroys him. You can see security telling fans to sit down. Odd. Figure Four goes on but Rude gets a foreign object shot in to take Flair out as Fifi is being put out of the ring to win the title. Thank goodness it’s over.

Rating: D. This was half an hour long which more or less sums up the major issue with it. This went on WAY too long and it got very boring after awhile. Half of the match was rest holds which is incredibly boring. If you cut the first half of this off then this is decent but other than that this was horrible. The arm and back work went nowhere and the ending came out of nowhere. Terribly boring match.

We talk about WarGames a bit.

Sting/Shockmaster/Davey Boy Smith/Dustin Rhodes vs. Vader/Harlem Heat/Sid Vicious

WarGames again. This is the mother of all gimmick matches in WCW and something that a lot of people with they would bring back in WWE, me being one of them. The idea is it’s 4 on 4 in a double cage match. Two people start us off, one from each team. They go at it for five minutes and then we have a coin toss (the heels will win). The winning team gets to send in another man for a 2-1 advantage. That last two minutes and then the losing team gets to send in its second man. After two more minutes the winning team gets to send in its third. You alternate until everyone is in and it’s first submission wins.

Harlem Heat are Kane and Kole here but I’ll be calling them by their more famous names. Vader is the other world champion here, the WCW World Champion. Animal is advising the faces here for no apparent reason. Dustin has really bad ribs here. Shockmaster is the hilariously infamous falling man that is more famous as Typhoon/Tugboat. Dustin starts without his partners wanting him to and gets Vader.

Dustin hammers Vader down surprisingly enough and pulls his boot off to beat on Vader even more. Well it’s resourceful if nothing else. Dustin is able to fight Vader off as well as anyone else has been able to do in a very long time. His ribs end that run though and there’s the Vader Bomb. Remember that you can’t end the match until after everyone is in the ring. That’s a great rule that makes sure there’s additional violence.

Rhodes fights back AGAIN and puts Vader down. That could be a heck of a Clash of the Champions main event actually. More boot shots (with the boot itself mind you, not a foot in it) to the head of Vader and Dustin is surprisingly in control. The heels win the coin toss which I literally think was a perfect record for them over the years. Dustin counters a dive off the top by Vader into a powerslam in a nice move.

Kane (Stevie Ray) comes in second. Dustin tries to fight them off but Vader gets a shot in to the ribs to take him down almost immediately. A minute in (remember everything now is just two minutes) and Dustin is in trouble. I’m not entirely sure why they sent in Vader so soon but whatever. Sting comes in but Vader and Stevie wait on him by the door like smart people would do.

2-1 is nothing for Sting though as he fights both guys off. I could watch Sting vs. Vader all day. Dustin is back up but is bleeding badly. His grandma is here tonight. Dusty’s mom is here. Let that sink in for a bit. Vader is sent into the cage and stumbles into the cameraman in a funny moment. Sid comes in to fight Sting in an old rivalry. Chokeslam takes Sting down and it’s all Sid.

The pops Sting gets for even the most basic moves are amazing. Vader and Sid ram Sting into the top of the cage for fun. With thirty seconds left it’s going to be the Bulldog in next. Yes Tugboat is batting cleanup. Davey comes in and Sid jumps him immediately. He fights off Sid and Vader by himself. He was a straight up tough guy in WCW if you haven’t seen any of his stuff there. In a nice touch Sting and Bulldog do to Sid what Vader and Sid did to Sting moments ago.

Kole (Booker T) comes in so there’s just Shocky left to come. Everyone is in one ring so that ring is completely overcrowded. The announcers make fun of Shockmaster falling which is funny stuff. They finally split up a bit and the match gets more interesting as a result. Sting takes down Stevie but hurts himself in the process. Sid gets caught in a Figure Four but here’s Shockmaster to even us up. Tony: Hey he made it through!

He’s bigger than Vader which isn’t something you often see. He beats up everyone in sight and after just over a minute and a half he throws Booker in a bearhug and it’s over. Wow so Typhoon beat a multiple time multiple time multiple time multiple time multiple time world champion? Sweet goodness man.

Rating: C. That’s bad for a WarGames match mind you. It’s ok, but the lack of starpower kind of hurts this here. Sid is an afterthought and Vader got beaten down like a fat jobber. Dustin Rhodes looked the most impressive out there which is odd. This was kind of weak and did nothing to set up the next shows or anything. Shockmaster was gone almost immediately after this and no one cared.

Cactus vs. Vader is announced for Spin the Wheel Make the Deal for Halloween Havoc.

Overall Rating: F+. This show was terrible. I finished watching it a few seconds ago and it occurs to me that I have no idea why the teams in Wargames were actually in WarGames. The matches were WAY too long with four matches going over 16 minutes and two going over 20 minutes. The problem is that long matches don’t always mean good matches, with this show being the proof of such a theory.

A lot of the matches already are forgotten to me despite watching the show earlier today. This isn’t an entertaining show at all with FAR too much time going to boring matches. This is a show where you need 11 matches or so instead of like six or however many there were here. 1993 wasn’t kind to WCW at all and this is no exception whatsoever. Terrible show and I’m just glad it’s over.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Halloween Havoc 1996: It Scares Me Too

IMG Credit: WWE

Someone requested this, but I do warn you that it’s rather old and not up to my current standards.

Halloween Havoc 1996
Date: October 27, 1996
Location: MGM Grand Garden Arena, Las Vegas, Nevada
Attendance: 10,000
Commentators: Bobby Heenan, Dusty Rhodes, Tony Schiavone

The main things here are of course the NWO matches, which tonight are Hogan vs. Savage for the title and the Outsiders vs. Harlem Heat for the tag titles. Other than that there isn’t a ton here as this is a relatively unimportant show. Sting is the mystery guy now do he’s not here I don’t think. The card looks fairly good though so let’s get to it.

The opening video is about how the NWO has destroyed everyone and tonight it’s Savage’s chance. No reason is given for why he should be different or anything but then again he’s a face so it’s not like it really means anything here.

Cruiserweight Title: Dean Malenko vs. Rey Mysterio

These two have been trading the title back and forth a bit lately. Rey is champion here and Dean has one of his old masks that he ripped off of him. Song angles never get old. Dean jumps him early and we have Mike Tenay here on commentary for the sake of sanity. Mike says that without the mask Rey is done. Nah he won two world titles after that so I’d think Mike is wrong here.

Rey’s knees are both in one piece here so he’s flying all over the place and is the most exciting thing most of the fans have ever seen in their lives. We kind of stop things for a bit here so Rey can put the old mask that Dean brought with him back on. Ok then. These two had some great matches as they did the whole technician vs. high flier thing and it almost always worked. This would be one of those times that it worked.

Dean grounding him here is the right thing to do as it fits into the psychology of the match here. I can live with it when it makes sense I guess. There’s a lot of this in Doug Williams vs. Kendrick at the moment. I love that spinning backbreaker that Dean can snap off like that. They’re doing a nice slow build here and it’s working very well as Rey is going to make his comeback and it’ll be awesome more than likely.

Ah here it comes. He starts busting out all of his big flips and cool moves and they start to work, playing into the idea that as long as Dean keeps it on the mat he can beat Rey. They hit insane speed for a reversal sequence that is just awesome. Rey starts busting out the ranas so you know he’s serious now. Dean counters West Coast Pop into a powerbomb which looks great. A gutwrench powerbomb off the top gives Dean the belt back in a cool ending. He got a BIG face pop despite being a heel here. That’s odd, but ok then.

Rating: B. Solid opener here as the crowd is very awake now. They’ve had better ones but the psychology was here more than it usually is but this worked out well. Rey did his thing and Dean did his. You combine that with good chemistry and this is what you get. Good match and great opener.

Jarrett is replacing Flair in the match vs. the Giant tonight. Any guesses on how this is going to go? Jarrett cuts a decent enough promo on Giant. Again, the guy is talented and no one is questioning that. He’s just not a main event guy, period. He’s just filling in for Flair tonight so there’s no real point to the match. Flair is here too for moral support. He hurt his shoulder so he had to drop the US Title too.

Lord of the Ring: Diamond Dallas Page vs. Eddie Guerrero

Yes, AGAIN they’re fighting over a ring that was won in a battle royal that is worthless at this point. Eddie won the ring at Clash of the Champions and DDP stole it back and now says he doesn’t know where it is. Nick Patrick is refereeing in a neckbrace. This was a feud that went on for a good while but no one remembers it because it meant nothing and went nowhere. They would be in the finals of the US Title Tournament at Starrcade and that’s about it.

Dusty thinks DDP is in the NWO. I think he’s the only big name that didn’t go NWO at some point. Page is still a heel but the pops are beginning to come. He calls Eddie girlfriend for no apparent reason. I’m not entirely sure if this is supposed to be interesting or not. It kind of is but I don’t think that’s what they’re going for here. I don’t know what I mean by that either so don’t try to make sense out of it.

The referee shoves DDP down and gets two for it somehow. DDP was getting better at this time but he still had a lot of moments where he did stuff that just looked awful. We just got one of them. He would have it smoothed out in about 8 months or so for his feud with Savage which was awesome. It’s oddly surprising how boring this match is though. They’re both good workers but this just isn’t interesting me at all. After a lot more of nothing, DDP grabs Eddie’s head and hits the Diamond Cutter to get the pin. Oh and Patrick had the ring apparently. Moving on.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t bad I guess but I just couldn’t get into it at all. It just wasn’t a very interesting match at all but I’ve seen far worse. There’s a severe lack of chemistry here which is odd because they’re both good workers. Just didn’t do it for me here at all.

Savage says this is the calm before the storm. When has Savage EVER been calm? He’s going to snap into Hogan. Wow that makes me want a Slim Jim. Oh and look who the sponsor is!

We literally go straight to Dean Malenko who says he’ll fight anybody that wants a shot, including Rey. Tenay towers over him which is a weird visual.

Ted DiBiase and the Giant are in the crowd for an NWO interview. The Giant has the US Title, even though he isn’t champion. Apparently Jarrett was offered a spot and turned it down. That’s fine enough for a story. Giant tries to talk and he’s a mile ahead of his debut last year, but it’s still pretty bad.

The Giant vs. Jeff Jarrett

Dusty says some people call Jeff Jarrett the giant killer. Who in the world has ever said that? Jarrett is a country guy here but he’s not singing at least. Again, the guy is fine for stuff like this. Just don’t put him much higher. Flair is here for support and comes out to his own entrance just because he feels like it I guess. The problem was that Jarrett had two things going against him: he was a heel in WWF, and he absolutely sucks as a face. Jarrett uses hit and run tactics and has strutted three times in 60 seconds.

Heenan says this is the NEW WCW. Oh that’s funny. And now Jarrett proves why he’s an idiot by putting on a headlock. When Tony Schiavone says you’re doing something stupid, you know you’re an idiot. And then he tries a hip toss. So basically Jarrett looked smart for about 45 seconds and since then he’s looked like an idiot. We get a MASSIVE NWO chant as that’s how much Jarrett is disliked. The NWO was still pretty evil at this point and they’re getting cheered somehow.

Giant balances out the stupidity of JJ by using basic, non-power moves. Flair grabs a mic and gives Jeff a pep talk. Giant does some backbreakers. That’s about the extent of their description. Did someone think this was a good idea for a match? Jarrett was a good worker but against guys the size of the Giant there’s only so many guys that can do much with him. Jarrett hits two PERFECT dropkicks and then tries to slam him.

The problem here is apparent and to be fair this isn’t Jarrett’s fault: he can’t do much to Giant due to the size. He punches a lot and throws dropkicks but how much of a match can you have based on that? Also in a match like this it’s heavily based around building up momentum for the big face comeback. When the face is booed every time he does something though it just doesn’t work that well. Now keep in mind this was supposed to be Flair but he got hurt so they did the best they could.

Jarrett knocks him down with a high cross body but gets the strong toss off. Figure four doesn’t work and we hit the floor. Figure four out there results in Jarrett getting his throat grabbed so Flair just hits him low for the DQ. The Horsemen come out for protection. Remember Jarrett wasn’t a Horseman at this point and was just a friend of Flair’s.

Rating: D. Just not a good match here but like I said, what did you really want them to do out here? The size was just too much to deal with and the crowd HATING Jarrett didn’t help either. Also Giant was still fairly inexperienced against guys that weren’t power guys that could help carry him, so I can give him a break on that. Still just a bad match though.

DiBiase is with Vincent (Virgil) and Syxx (X-Pac/Sean Waltman). They talk way too nicely about Jericho and how they’re coming for the Cruiserweight Title.

Chris Jericho vs. Syxx

The commentators having to ignore the NWO being cheered is always funny. Patrick is the referee again which has to be leading somewhere. This is before the neck injury for Waltman so he’s incredibly fast here. The Dungeon of Doom is at ringside. This is a very fast paced match as we talk about Jericho’s dad for no apparent reason.

This is one of those matches that is hard to comment on as it’s pretty good. Waltman could go against small guys and this is no exception. It wasn’t until he because X-Pac and became the giant killer or whatever that he became so annoying. We crank it up after a good deal of Syxx dominance.

Tony and Heenan get in an argument over whether or not Nick Patrick made a fast count. Oh that’s funny. Allegedly he’s counting slow for Jericho and there may be something to that. Dusty wants him arrested. Even Heenan gets on him for being slow. Ok now you know it’s serious. Jericho gets what should have been a five or so and yells at Patrick about it. He walks into a spinkick for the regular speed pin.

Rating: B-. This was about Jericho vs. Patrick which would happen at WW3 and would be the first match where an NWO guy would lose on PPV since their inception. This was very fast paced and fun though, but the referee thing was just annoying by the end of things. Other than that it was good though.

Luger, looking like he has Dolph Ziggler’s poofy hair, says he’ll get back at Arn for something. Oh ok Arn blamed Lex for tapping at War Games and more or less said he’s a coward, setting this up.

Lex Luger vs. Arn Anderson

Is there anything sweeter than that Horsemen theme song? It’s just flat out awesome sounding. Luger is in all black here which never really looked right on him. Sting has been offered a spot in the NWO. Anderson has hurt Lex’s back recently so he’s not at 100%. This is just not interesting at all. Luger’s back is fine it seems and we’re totally just killing time here. I love Dusty’s ridiculous faith in WCW. It’s always very amusing.

The Dungeon is cheering for Luger. And now Arn’s back is hurt. Sure why not. This match is the epitome of average. Lex does some stuff then Arn does some stuff and then we switch off. It’s just two guys doing moves on each other with a bit of a flow to it. It’s not interesting in the slightest either as there’s barely a reason for them to be fighting but we’re seeing it anyway. Luger works on the back which makes sense for him so that’s fine.

A spinebuster from Arn gets us back to even to an extent as I’m just waiting on this match to end. The back injury for Luger flares up all of a sudden of course so at least the continuity of lack of continuity is there. DDT doesn’t hit as this is just nothing. I know I’ve said that a lot but it’s true. And there goes the referee of course. Arn nails Luger and knocks him into Mark Curtis in case you’re interested for some reason.

We’ll throw in a chair that does nothing as we pad this match out a bit more. The worst catapult in recorded history puts Arn kind of into the post. Lex hits some chair shots on Arn and the Rack ends it. Luger doesn’t let him go. Arn takes forever to get up and the Horsemen come out to help him. He leaves on a stretcher. I think this was what explained him being more or less retired other than the occasional match afterwards.

Rating: D. This wasn’t a particularly bad match, but it is perhaps the least interesting match I’ve seen in a good many months. It’s a good example of a match that’s just there. Two guys wrestled, nothing special happened, one guy used his finishing move to get the win. That’s all there is to it and there’s nothing special about it at all.

Harlem Heat call out the Outsiders.

Faces of Fear vs. Chris Benoit/Steve McMichael

Mongo has barely any experience at all so expect a heavy dose of Benoit here which is hardly a bad thing. If nothing else we get the music again for the Horsemen. This feud went on forever and there was never really a blowoff for it other than it just stopping. Meng and Mongo start and McMichael hides from a kick. Oh that looked bad. It’s always cool seeing Benoit’s mix of wrestling and brawling. Not a lot of people were as good at it as he was.

Mongo loses a sumo match to Meng. Is there a reason this is happening? Mongo wakes up and uses football moves to get Meng down. This works so well that Meng kicks him in the face. I love that. Whenever someone does something stupid, KICK THEM IN THE FACE. McMichael tries some dropkicks. This is a very sad sight. The match is only watchable when Benoit is in there so the tag can’t come fast enough.

In a NICE move, Meng backdrops Benoit into a powerbomb from Barbarian. It’s an awesome move, so Dusty starts talking about the Outsiders. Why you ask? It’s Dusty so this is normal for him. A double headbutt from the top hits Benoit as it’s a good thing that he’s in. Tony talks about an old rule called the One Save Rule, which says that if you save your partner more than once it’s a DQ. This rule isn’t in effect anymore and I’ve never heard of it.

Mongo pops Meng with the briefcase, thereby completely ignoring all stereotypes, and the top rope headbutt ends it. The Dungeon runs in and since the Horsemen are with Anderson at the hospital it’s Benoit vs. everyone. That only works for so long though as the Dungeon stands tall. At least there’s a feud here to explain this. Sullivan goes up to Woman and says let me show you why I’m still the man and does what we would call a punt on Benoit.

Rating: D. I know I gave the previous match the same grade but this is somewhat better. There’s a feud here which makes sense so that’s definitely a good thing. This was really bad when Mongo was in and decent when Benoit was in. Mongo always looked like he was trying, but he just didn’t ever get the hang of it. This is a great example of it.

DiBiase introduces the Outsiders.

Tag Titles: The Outsiders vs. Harlem Heat

That original NWO music is still awesome. Then again so is Harlem Heat’s. The Heat had recently lost and regained the titles from Public Enemy for a pointless reign that lasted like two weeks. The Outsiders grab the belts and hold them up to a pop. Seeing the whole rebellion against the angles is very interesting. It was clear that the fans wanted something new. WWF realized that and made Austin, the rebel character, the top guy in the company and a face. Moral: listen to the audience. They’ll never let you down.

Apparently Sherri is the quarterback of Harlem Heat. Well I wouldn’t mind seeing her in the pants I guess. Stevie knocks Hall over the top rope which they immediately explain is NOT a DQ here. Why didn’t they just drop that stupid rule? I never got a straight answer to that. Anyway, Heenan says this is the first real test for the Outsiders, because clearly fighting Luger and Sting at Hog Wild wasn’t a test right? Or Savage, Luger and Sting or any other big combination they had. I love idiotic lines like that.

The fans loudly boo Harlem Heat taking over. I feel sorry for the announcers at times and then they say something stupid enough to make me lose any and all sympathy I have for them. The Heat dominate early on which is different than what you would expect. Crowd is totally behind the Outsiders here. Hall uses a chokeslam which he used back in like 93 I think. It’s weird to think he’s been using that since Giant was in high school.

Hall kisses Sherri. Can we get a sexual harassment lawsuit from the congregation? Booker hooks a sleeper and gets booed out of the building for it. Stevie gets the hot tag and cleans house, setting up the Harlem Hangover on Hall. Parker comes in for no apparent reason at all and swings the cane at Nash. This of course doesn’t work and two cane shots from Nash to Booker give the Outsiders the tag titles.

Rating: C-. Eh nothing great here but not that bad. This is far more important for the historical aspect than anything else. The ending made sense at least and the cheating was minimal, but the heels won with nefarious activities so that’s all fine. This wasn’t terrible, but the crowd told a lot of the story here as the heels got cheered and few liked the faces.

Hogan is in the crowd where DiBiase was when he did the promos earlier and talks about his new movies. He has a blonde wig on that looks like Sting’s haircut from the old WCW days.

WCW World Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Randy Savage

So basically Savage has zero chance here and everyone on the planet knows it. The Outsiders have been escorted from the building allegedly, even though Giant was also and he’s with Hogan here. They must be a bit rushed as Savage’s music starts up while Hogan’s intro is going on and they have to stop it. Savage has a massive monster truck, complete with cowboy hat on it of all things.

Savage went on a big winning streak to get the title shot and then since he was getting over again in a feud against Hogan, he stopped winning for about a month leading up to this match, hence what I said about zero chance. Savage gets a mic and wants everyone else out other than himself and Hogan. Why do I have a bad feeling that the wig is going to play a long role in this match? Giant is thrown out so it’s no longer a reenactment of Mania IV.

Hogan stalls. I mean stalls a LOT. Savage comes at him and he runs for the ropes. Hey! A headlock! Hogan looks SMALL here, maybe weighing 260. And he stalls again, heading to the floor even longer. That headlock is all we’ve had in over four minutes so far. It’s just Hogan hiding in the ropes or in the corner or on the floor the whole time. We’re entering Zbyszko land here. So Liz, who isn’t here, is signed to the NWO but loves Savage still. Got it. Well that actually is a bit intriguing at least.

Savage takes over and steals Hogan’s sunglasses. Yeah Hogan was in sunglasses and a wig for the first seven minutes or so of the match. And there goes the wig. WOW! Hogan is BALD! Why was this supposed to be a big deal? He didn’t have hair in Rocky 3 so why is this a surprise? Savage puts the wig on and this is just bad so far. Hogan busts out a chair, marking the ONLY decent thing in the whole ten minutes so far. Seriously, THIS is the main event of one of the biggest shows of the year.

Hogan kisses Savage on the top of his head and here’s Liz. Someone actually shouts GET EM LIZ! That’s very amusing. And there go Hogan’s tights ecause we all want to see that. Hogan does nothing but punch and kick and choke. Savage does those things but throws in some clotheslines too. This is one of the worst main events I can ever remember. Liz comes in to check on Savage as Hogan is going for the legdrop. Of course we can hear every word Hogan says to her as he’s on a mic.

There goes the referee and here’s Nick Patrick and then another referee at the same time. The elbow hits and Patrick gets to two before his neck starts to hurt. Savage steals an object from Hogan and nails him. Giant is back as this is beyond a mess. Chokeslam on the floor and Savage is more or less dead. Hogan is put on top and gets the pin and a face pop.

Rating: F. This was supposed to be some kind of epic showdown and it was overbooked and a comedy match that wasn’t funny. Let’s see: 5 minutes of stalling, three run-ins, a foreign object, a cheating referee, a ref bump, another ref bump, chair shots and some punching sprinkled in. Yep it’s WCW all right.

Giant brings out a bowl of ice water to wake up Hogan which is amusing for some reason. Hogan grabs a mic and says he’s the king of Hollywood and I have a bad feeling I know where this is going. Ok I do know where this is going but you get the idea. Yep, we have bagpipes. The look on Hogan’s face when Piper shows up is great.

Piper and Hogan say hi to each other and for no apparent reason Hogan and Giant are alone with Piper and do nothing but talk to him. Hogan says he and Piper used to be neck and neck for the biggest star in wrestling. Not really but this is WCW so why use facts? Piper says he’s as big an icon in wrestling as Hogan is. No, not really. He says he’s as big a movie star as Hogan is. Ok that’s true. Piper says he’s shooting here. Yes, this is Starrcade’s main event by the way.

Piper FINALLY says something very true: At Wrestlemania, they wouldn’t have been cheering for Hogan so much if they hadn’t hated Piper so much. I didn’t buy that at first but the more I’ve thought about it the more I think there’s truth in it. Piper was despised by the fans and Hogan was the guy opposing him. I know Hogan was a big deal, but it was Piper fighting Mr. T and doing the mainstream stuff. Hogan was just a wrestler fighting him. I don’t think Piper was a bigger deal, but I think equal is fine, at least for Wrestlemania and the stuff leading up to it.

Piper wants Hogan to admit that he would be nothing without the fans behind him. He also points out that Hogan has never beaten him. Piper starts to leave and Hogan makes a skirt joke. He picks up the belt as Hogan leaves and they actually keep arguing as the show goes off the air. That’s funny for some reason.

Overall Rating
: D. This was bad. The opener is good but seriously did you expect anything less? Far from their best match too. Other than that there’s more or less nothing. None of the matches other than the main event are overly bad but they all have been done better or just aren’t interesting at all. Hogan vs. Piper was a cool segment to an extent, but knowing what was coming would just suck the life out of it. Oh and World War 3 is next. Great. Avoid this one.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of the WWE Grab Bag (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/03/23/new-paperback-kbs-grab-bag/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Thunder – July 19, 2000: They’re On A Roll

Thunder
Date: July 19, 2000
Location: Breslin Students Events Center, East Lansing, Michigan
Attendance: 5,738
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan, Mike Tenay

This is a rare live Thunder though I can’t imagine it’s going to make the show any better than it usually is. The big story at the moment is Scott Steiner being all insane and breaking various things, only to get beaten down by Kevin Nash, like so many people before him have been. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap from Nitro. As usual, that was the kind of show that flew by so fast that I could barely remember half of it anyway so for once this was helpful.

Harlem Heat arrives. I know I ask this a lot but what is Russo’s obsession with showing people getting out of cars?

Jeff Jarrett is doing commentary tonight. Oh geez. He gets in two slappy’s before he even sits down.

Crowbar vs. Mike Sanders

Sanders is Above Average and had been on Saturday Night all the way back in 1998. Crowbar looks out at the crowd for some reason, allowing Sanders to get in some forearms to the back for an early two. A German suplex sends Sanders flying as the announcers point out Lenny Lane’s huge USE ME sign. Hopefully that makes him put the thing down because it’s really distracting.

They head outside with Sanders stopping a charge with a superkick, followed by a dancing knee drop back inside. We hit the chinlock for a bit as the USE ME sign is back. I’m sure the handful of fans that paid for seats behind him (as he goes up and down the row) are thrilled to have their view blocked by a lame angle that isn’t going to go anywhere.

Crowbar gets two off a Lionsault and Daffney adds a Frankenscreamer (is she immune to the no interference policy?) to send Sanders outside. Mike is sat in a chair for a plancha from Crowbar (Jarrett: “What kind of rasslin is that?”) but Daffney’s distraction allows Sanders to steal Jeff’s guitar and knock Crowbar out for the pin. Jarrett: “He won the match with Slapnuts.” So is Slapnuts the guitar?

Rating: C. Sanders will soon find his calling as a talker but this was much more about establishing someone new on the roster. There’s definitely a push of some new talent around this time but it’s so far past too late at this point that it’s only more false hope. Still though, it’s always cool to see someone fresh instead of the same horrible acts that have choked the life out of this company.

Lenny Lane is escorted off by security. Thank goodness.

Here’s Booker T. with something to say but Rick Steiner jumps him from behind before anything can be said. Stevie Ray comes out for the save and Jeff joins in on the brawl until security breaks it up.

Daffney screams a lot and runs off with a chair to find Mike Sanders. For some reason I want to see where this goes.

Lane is being taken away when he runs into the Cat. All the Laniacs (I believe they meet in the same room as the Jericholics) want is their leader back. Cat: “You’re not a leader. You’re a jobber.” For some reason Cat has a pebble in his pocket and says Lane can have a match if he can take it from his hand. Lane takes it away easily so Cat shouts that he didn’t say go. The result: a tables match vs. the Wall.

Here’s new US Champion Lance Storm. After the full Canadian national anthem, Storm gets right to the point by listing off some great US Champions. However, that title is dead because he’s renaming the US Title the Canadian Heavyweight Championship and puts a Maple Leaf sticker on the front.

As the announcers freak out (save for Heenan because he’s Bobby Heenan), Storm demands respect from the fans and asks security to bring in a typical American fan. This means an overweight woman, who Storm rips on for not being in shape. Cue Mike Awesome for the save but Kanyon runs out to try a Kanyon Cutter on the woman. This brings in Buff Bagwell and I’m guessing it’s a tag match later.

Jarrett offers to teach Sanders how to swing a guitar and knocks him cold. So much for Sanders meaning anything.

Miss Hancock has gotten David Flair a Cruiserweight Title shot tonight and promises, ahem, some fun to him if he wins.

Lenny Lane vs. The Wall

Tables match because that’s what Wall does. Wall powerslams him to start and throws Lane across the ring with ease. Lane breaks up a superplex attempt and pounds away in the corner, only to charge into something like a backdrop/hot shot, sending him throat first into the middle turnbuckle. They go outside with Lane going throat first across the barricade before Wall sets up the first table. He takes too long though and gets knocked off the apron and through the table to give Lane his job back…..in his last match with the promotion. Only in WCW.

The Misfits are given their assignments.

Mike Sanders is still getting up (that’s quite the guitar shot) when Daffney comes in and hits him with a chair. “How do you like that rookie?”

Lenny Lane is happy in his locker room (because if you show up with no job, you have a locker room) when Wall comes in. It’s implied that Wall took a dive.

The Filthy Animals sneak into Kronik’s locker room.

Cruiserweight Title: David Flair vs. Lieutenant Loco

David is challenging and wearing a suit here. Loco jumps him from behind and gets two off an early side slam. Hancock distracts Loco because……well because she’s Miss Hancock and it’s not that difficult for her to distract someone, allowing David to take over off a suplex. Loco comes right back with basic stuff, including a bunch of chops after ripping off David’s shirt. Hancock tries to bring in a chair but David gets caught in a sunset flip instead. Some cheating backfires as the referee catches Hancock holding David’s hands. Cue Major Gunns to chase Hancock off, leaving Loco to tornado DDT David onto a chair to retain.

Gunns goes to give David mouth to mouth but Hancock starts a catfight. Yep it’s time for this feud.

Cat reinstates Lane and fires Wall for taking a dive. That earns Cat a beating from the big man. Security breaks it up and I’m pretty sure Chris Harris and James Storm could be seen.

Sanders is getting up again when Kanyon runs in for a Cutter. Well if they’re going to treat the guy like a goon, at least it’s funny.

The Jung Dragons beat up the Cat because they finally have an open shot.

Tank Abbott vs. Great Muta

Mike Tenay has had to leave commentary due to some throat issues. Tank forearms a few times but gets kicked down to set up the Power Drive elbow. Cue the Dragons to help with a beatdown so here’s the Cat to help Tank. That earns him some mist to the face, allowing Tank to knock Muta out for the pin. Was Muta REALLY that bored in Japan that he called up WCW and agreed to put over Tank Abbott on live TV?

Major Gunns challenges Miss Hancock to a Rip off the Camouflage (ROTC) match at New Blood Rising. Gene is WAY too happy about this.

Kronik’s locker room has been trashed so they tell a crew member to keep an eye on the door. As soon as they leave, it’s another Kanyon Cutter. He’s getting really good at those things.

Jarrett and Rick Steiner are making plans for the match when Midajah comes in to say she’ll do anything tonight.

Kronik vs. Filthy Animals

Disco/Juvy/Rey here in a handicap match with Juvy and Rey coming out in Kronik’s vest coats. Juvy tries to jump Clark from behind as Konnan babbles in whatever language he uses on commentary. I know it’s not English and I know it’s not Spanish but it involves cherries and potatoes. Kronik gets annoyed at the Animals for getting in their way and chases them out to the apron.

Rey comes in and gets to face Adams, which is one of the most backwards face vs. heel dynamics I’ve ever seen. Mysterio springboards into a full nelson slam and Adams throws Disco into him for good measure. The Animals finally take over on Clark with a Bronco Buster but Clark throws Juvy away with ease. Everything breaks down and High Times plants Disco for two (called three by Tony), followed by the powerbomb/top rope clothesline for the pin a few seconds later.

Rating: D+. Some of Kronik’s offense looked cool here but the commentary from Konnan took away any of the good this match had going for it. Thankfully the Animals aren’t in the Tag Team Title match at the pay per view because it would have been really stupid to have them lose like this. Don’t worry though because I’m sure WCW will find far more stupid things to do in the coming weeks.

Here are Shane Douglas, carrying a bag, and Torrie, with the latter wearing a dress tighter than should be physically possible. Shane pulls out the Stuff Magazine with Torrie inside and asks about her turn-ons listed in the magazine. Apparently she likes seeing her man work out so Shane pulls out a dumb bell and starts lifting, causing Torrie to rub his chest. This brings out Kidman to dropkick Shane but a Torrie distraction lets Shane hit him in the neck with the dumb bell, likely breaking his neck in the process.

We get the Road Report but the guy doesn’t have his phone. Perfect Event comes up to suggest that he use 1-800-CALL-ATT. Problem solved until it’s another KANYON CUTTER for the best fake commercial I’ve seen in a very long time.

The Artist, who can talk now, issues an open challenge to any champion. I think you know what’s coming.

Hardcore Title: The Artist vs. Big Vito

Vito is defending in case you’re a bit slow. They quickly go into a room with Paisley and Kwee Wee watching……I’m guessing a monitor or something. Artist hits him with an ironing board before doing the same to Kwee Wee for no apparent reason. Pink hater. Vito takes over again and brings him down to ringside, only to get hit with a chair a few times. Artist goes with a low blow because good guys are just less bad in WCW.

The Mafia kick and a suplex set up a top rope elbow from the champ and it’s already table time. Vito sets it up in the middle of the ring for the implant DDT…..and the table breaks as they’re standing on it. The fans boo it out of the building as Vito hits him with a trashcan, followed by the DDT to retain.

Rating: D-. So we’re using the lame Hardcore Title match to set up what’s going to be an even worse Kwee Wee vs. the Artist feud. I can kind of understand Russo’s obsession with Jeff Jarrett but I will never get WCW’s love of Artist. The guy just isn’t that good and it shows worse and worse every time he’s in the ring.

Awesome wants to bring one of his women to the ring but Bagwell doesn’t think that’s the best idea.

Positively Kanyon/Lance Storm vs. Buff Bagwell/Mike Awesome

Kanyon during his entrance: “BUY MY BOOK!” We get the Canadian national anthem again until Awesome runs down to clean house. A clothesline puts Lance on the floor and Awesome nails a nice dive to take him down again. Back in and Bagwell beats Kanyon up as Tony recaps Judy Bagwell’s recent problems. It’s off to Awesome vs. Kanyon with Mike coming in via the slingshot shoulder. A nice suplex plants Kanyon again and it’s back to Storm, who walks into an Awesome Bomb.

The Awesome Splash gets two on Kanyon with Storm making the save and everything breaks down. Storm gets the Maple Leaf on Awesome but Buff breaks it up with the Blockbuster. Kanyon makes a quick save though and pulls the ref in the way of a baseball slide. He hits Bagwell with the book (which I’m assuming he reloaded with a fresh brick) and does the same to Awesome, setting up a Kanyon Cutter for the pin.

Rating: C. Not a bad little match here but we had to speed through things because we needed to see stuff like the Cat earlier in the night. Storm has somehow been a breath of fresh air for the company despite his character being one of the most boring guys in the history of wrestling. Maybe it’s just that he’s a fresh name or something but he’s working very well here.

Rick Steiner and Jarrett say nothing of note. Jarrett uses the acronym NOFYB.

Cat doesn’t know what that means but is sick of Steiner and Jarrett.

Harlem Heat is ready. Well that’s good for them but it’s time for the real star power.

We get a sitdown interview with Kevin Nash. He thinks the people behind the scenes of WCW are trying to keep Hall out. The only time WCW ever had a spark was when the two of them came down from New York to make the company go somewhere. Hall has been healthy for months now but he’s sitting around because WCW doesn’t want him around.

Nash has seventeen months left on his contract and he’ll honor that deal, but then who knows because it’s not about money anymore. As for Goldberg, WCW gave him too much power too soon. Nash has to keep him in check because he’s never paid his dues and won’t have nine years from now. It’s nice to see guys like Booker make it and he was glad that “they put the strap on him.”

Hudson asks about the three way at New Blood Rising (Nash: “It won’t be a dance.”) which is now a #1 contenders match. Apparently there’s a problem with who is going to come out on top. Nash says he’s coming out on top no matter how the match is booked and he’s not going to lobby for a finish. He’s going over (his words) because he says so and it’s time for him to get his.

These are the kinds of segments that I never know what to say. Nash talking about someone not wanting Hall around was fine because you can pin that on Russo and Bischoff (Is he even still around anymore? I don’t remember seeing him after Bash at the Beach.). Hinting at going to the WWF was even fine, but then you get to him talking about how a match is going to be booked or who is going to go over in a big match because of how the finish was lobbied. I have no idea what this was supposed to accomplish but I’m sure the internet will be talking about it tomorrow, right Russo?

Jeff Jarrett/Rick Steiner vs. Harlem Heat

This is the closest we’re going to get to Harlem Heat vs. the Steiners. Cat is out here to make sure things are fair. Booker and Rick start things off with the champ taking over. This brings out Midajah to try to come off the top but Cat calls her down and handcuffs himself to her. Well what did she thing was going to happen with the boss out there and her in bright pink pants?

It’s off to Stevie vs. Jarrett with Jeff getting kicked out to the floor. Back in and Steiner clotheslines Stevie for two and we hit the chinlock after all that grueling work. A belly to back puts Steiner down and the hot tag brings in Booker as house is cleaned. Jeff breaks up the missile dropkick and nails a superplex, only to have Booker tie their legs up for a small package and the pin.

Rating: D+. The Booker comeback was good but Rick Steiner is just killing anything he’s doing at this point. The guy isn’t any good and hasn’t been for a very long time yet for some reason they just won’t get rid of him. Jarrett was Jarrett and Stevie was more energetic than usual but there’s only so much you can do in a five minute main event.

Booker gets beaten down to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Dang they’re on a roll lately. These last few shows have taken out a lot of the nonsense and just let them have their dull wrestling shows. The point though is you can see the stories they’re telling and for the most part, they’re working fine. There’s still a lot of stuff they need to fix but at least there’s some good stuff going here and far less bad, which is the most important thing. Enjoy it while it lasts though because you know this is going to go bad soon enough.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of Wrestlemania at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B0188BJRGU

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Uncensored 2000 (2015 Redo): Very Bad Things

Uncensored 2000
Date: March 19, 2000
Location: American Airlines Arena, Miami, Florida
Attendance: 5,000
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Mark Madden, Tony Schiavone

We had to get here eventually. This is one of the lamest sounding shows I’ve seen in a very long time and it’s not something I want to sit through again. The main event is Jeff Jarrett vs. Sid for the World Title, but the real big match is Hogan vs. Flair, because we only did that last year at this same show so it’s high time to do it again. Let’s get to it.

The opening video recaps the triple main event of Hogan vs. Flair, Sid vs. Jarrett and Luger vs. Sting. Two of those men are under 40 and that number would go down to one in about two and a half months.

Hogan and Sid have a chat in the back where they say to watch each other’s back.

Jarrett tells the Harris Twins that he has an insurance policy.

A limo is here.

The opening pyro doesn’t get much of a reaction from the people. There’s a shot of the crowd and they look like they’re about to watch an instructional film on how to properly wash their hands.

Cruiserweight Title: The Artist vs. Psychosis

Artist is defending after Psychosis beat Kaz Hayashi to earn this shot on Thunder. Their video to set this up shows Hayashi pinning Psychosis a few weeks back, but somehow that didn’t earn him a title shot. The announcers talk about the Artist dominating the division for the last few months, despite him not even having the belt for a month yet. To be fair, I doubt anyone remembers the last few months of the cruiserweights at this point. Paisley and Juventud Guerrera are the seconds here.

Before we can get going, we get more music and it’s….the debuting Chris Candido to do commentary. After a minute of no contact so Candido can come out, the Artist (and his slimming purple vertical striped shirt) charges into the corner, allowing Psychosis to hurricanrana the champ down. Artist ties him in the Tree of Woe for some lame kicks to the ribs before a superkick gets two. The ring mic seems a bit low tonight as there isn’t a ton of sound when people hit the mat.

Psychosis is sent into the steps before Artist nails a running clothesline in the corner. Instead of a chinlock, Artist pulls on Psychosis’ hair with a knee in his back. That’s rather effective. A clothesline (to the middle of the chest) doesn’t have much effect on Psychosis so he comes back with a top rope hurricanrana for two.

Psychosis plants him with a sitout gordbuster (hopefully knocking some skills into Artist’s head) and Juvy goes after an interfering Paisley, who beats him up and takes off his shirt. There’s the guillotine legdrop but Psychosis pulls away at two to yell at Paisley. Or maybe he’s asking where she got her catsuit. Artist’s middle rope DDT (with Psychosis jumping into it) retains the title.

Rating: D. I feel like I have to say this every single time he’s out there, but Artist just isn’t very good. He’s such a generic wrestler and his finisher, while cool in theory, is almost never executed properly as the other guy has to jump up to give their head to Iaukea. Bad choice for an opener here as this did nothing to fire me up for the rest of the show.

Tony throws it to Gene. “That’s how you fill some time.” Just……yeah.

Bam Bam Bigelow regrets bringing the Wall into this business because he’s going about it all wrong. Tonight, he’s finishing the Wall and showing him how to do it right. Again, this is one of the better done stories in WCW at this point.

XS vs. Norman Smiley/The Demon

Somehow this ties into Miss Hancock as she comes down to do commentary before Norman and Demon make their entrances. I’m still not sure what the story is here other than XS being jerks and messing with Demon and Hancock being annoyed at XS for dumping her. Hancock thinks XS stands for extra small.

Demon’s casket appears and Norman comes out in full Demon garb. Demon throws Rave (is that his name this week?) around to start but gets knocked outside, leaving Norman to take over in the ring. Lane takes the spanking dance (not the Big Wiggle. You don’t come back from that) and things settle down again. Hancock says she has a new tag team in Los Fabulosos: Silver King and El Dandy. Tony: “If there was ever a time to be El Dandy, it’s right now.” Demon gets double teamed as the fans LOUDLY chant for Norman. That says a lot given how small the crowd is in such a big building.

XS tries a double clothesline on Demon, but it winds up putting Rave and Demon down as Lane stays on his feet….and falls down a few seconds later. Do these people just not get physics? The hot tag brings in Norman to clean house with right hands and the swinging slam to Lane. A school boy gets two on Norman and everything breaks down as the announcers start spouting off KISS lyrics. Demon and Lane go outside, leaving Norman to put Rave in the Norman’s Conquest for the win. That was sudden.

Rating: D. Other than Miss Hancock, I have no idea what the appeal was supposed to be here. This was a lame Nitro level match with Norman being OH SO FUNNY as the Demon, even though he wrestled like he always does. Tragically for him though, the fans seem to love him so he’s dead where he stands. This didn’t need to be on pay per view but at least it killed a few minutes.

Post match XS blames Hancock for the loss and tries to kidnap her but the Screamin Demons make the save. Hancock dances with Norman. Now that deserves to be on pay per view.

Kidman and Booker argue again.

Quick recap of Wall destroying everything in his path over the last few weeks, which has mainly been David Flair and Crowbar.

Bam Bam Bigelow vs. The Wall

They slug it out to start with Bigelow getting the better of it until he charges into a clothesline. Bigelow slams Wall down and hits the top rope headbutt for two. A pair of boots to the face gets the same thing on Bigelow but he grabs a running DDT for his second two. Wall comes back with a Cactus Clothesline and they fight to the back where Wall chokeslams Bigelow through a table for the DQ.

Rating: D. Well that happened. This was looking like a decent brawl until the lame ending in less than three and a half minutes. The story makes sense here and it’s good to see Wall get the better of it (this is one of those cases where leaving Bigelow laying is better than getting a win) but I don’t see this getting him anywhere because WCW.

Post match David Flair and Crowbar go after Wall with Crowbar getting in some good shots. Bigelow is loaded onto a stretcher, likely due to shock of how lame the table spot was. Crowbar and Wall wind up on the metal set and, of course, Crowbar gets chokeslammed through the wooden part of the set. Wall has a euphoric look on his face, which is totally and completely different than Bubba Ray Dudley’s euphoric look when he puts people through tables. Fans: “JUMP! JUMP! JUMP!”

Crowbar is taken out on a stretcher and this takes forever. The announcers get serious, so let’s go to Brian Knobbs, who dedicates his next match to David Flair and Crowbar. David wasn’t really hurt but let’s dedicate it to him anyway.

Hardcore Title: Brian Knobbs vs. 3 Count

3 Count is defending as a unit and this is elimination rules. Before the match, it’s time for some singing and dancing, which is more entertaining than the previous match but Knobbs interrupts. Tony actually asks how they can call this match when they aren’t sure if Crowbar is ever going to walk again and think they should stop the show. OH SCREW OFF. This comes off as trying to play off of Owen Hart’s death and Vince not stopping the show. As in a real life death being compared to a scripted bump. If that’s what they were doing, then WCW deserves to go under on this night instead of a year later.

Anyway, Knobbs brings some weapons down and shrugs off 3 Count using them against him. Shannon gets a Pit Stop but Shane (in a mask to protect his broken nose) blasts Brian in the face with a chair. They whip him into a ladder and all three dive off the top of it with splashes/a Swanton. The champs stop for some dancing but eat a big blast from a fire extinguisher, followed by a chair to Shane’s broken nose for the first elimination.

Knobbs spends a minute setting up a table before powerbombing Evan through it to get this down to one on one. Helms is back up despite being eliminated but Knobbs easily beats him down as well. Brian falls over a table with Shannon on top for three but Knobbs is in the ropes, which apparently saves you in a hardcore match. So falls count anywhere, as long as you’re not in the ropes? I felt stupid just typing something like that. Knobbs beats up Evan and Shane again before a middle rope trashcan shot to Shannon gives him the title back. Tenay: “Respectability just came back to the hardcore division!”

Rating: D-. A foot on the ropes in a hardcore match. Not only does WCW not get why the WWF’s hardcore division worked, but they also don’t get what hardcore is supposed to be about. 3 Count as champions had potential but why go with something interesting when you can go with one of Hogan’s friends?

Harlem Heat is ready.

The limo is still sitting there.

Vampiro says he’s ashamed by the things he sees and the violent things he thinks about doing. He wants to be a good person but Fit Finlay keeps pushing him to do very bad things. Tony: “You could subtitle Uncensored very bad things.”

Kidman/Booker vs. Harlem Heat

J. Biggs sits in on commentary because we haven’t had a guest commentator in a few matches now. Booker slugs away at Stevie to start as you can see five very empty seats about ten rows off the floor. You would think they would send someone out there to hide how bad that looks. Kidman comes in and loses the team’s advantage, allowing for the tag off to Big T. It’s back to Booker to clean about half the house but Harlem Heat double teams Kidman down again.

Torrie gets on the apron for no apparent reason and Biggs calls her a yak. Kidman gets thrown outside where Big T. can dive over the barricade to take him down again, causing a small earthquake in the process. Booker breaks up a cover and Biggs keeps jabbering away, only to finally shut up when Kidman DDT’s Stevie for a breather. The hot tag brings in Booker to clean the rest of the house.

The Rock Bottom gets two on T. and a second one drops Ray. Stevie isn’t the legal man though so it’s a double side slam instead, with Kidman making a fast save. Tony: “TEAMWORK!” Kidman shoves Stevie into Cash and comes in for a sunset flip on T. with Booker kicking him over to give Kidman the pin.

Rating: C-. Not terrible here and the right team won, but I don’t buy for a second that they’re going to be used properly, at least not with the Harris Twins around to suck the life out of anything that’s going on in the tag division. Kidman and Booker work well together and we got to see Torrie so this is pretty easily the best thing of the night so far.

We look at Crowbar being chokeslammed through the stage again.

Recap of Finlay vs. Vampiro, which has really just been Finlay attacking him backstage. This comes after Vampiro was getting some cups of coffee in the main event. Now he’s here.

Vampiro vs. Fit Finlay

Oh and let’s make it falls count anywhere because Heaven forbid we have more than one or two wrestling matches tonight. Finlay puts him down to start and we’re on a nerve hold thirty seconds in. Vampiro fights up and nails a top rope spinwheel kick before slowly stomping away. That’s fine with Finlay who gets a chair, but Little Naitch takes it away because this is falls count anywhere and not a No DQ match.

Instead they head outside with Finlay dropping him throat first across the barricade, meaning it’s time to fight into the crowd. It gets all the way to the concourse as they do the “grab hair and walk with me” formula. They hit the women’s room as I’m still trying to figure out why these two are even fighting like this. It goes to the men’s room for the sake of taste and Vampiro climbs onto a stall but dives into a trashcan shot. They leave again and the lights turn red before both guys head outside. Never mind as they head back inside where Vampiro sends him into a wall and The Nail in the Coffin on the concrete ends Finlay.

Rating: D. BUT WHY WERE THEY FIGHTING??? I’ve been watching the TV shows lately and I still have no idea why these two are even mad at each other. I know they’ve had issues in the back but what started it all? Vampiro is stuck back down on the card instead of doing something important because he was on the verge of mattering and WCW will not stand for that.

Vampiro walks through the crowd. Roman Reigns he is not.

The Mamalukes are ready for their title defense.

Tag Team Titles: Harris Brothers vs. Mamalukes

The Mamalukes (Big Vito/Johnny the Bull) are defending against Ron and Don. We’ll make it No DQ just so things don’t stay boring. Disco jumps in on commentary too so we can keep up the trend. Vito hammers on Don to start and the Twins take a breather on the floor. Back in and Johnny powerslams Don for two before it’s right back to Vito.

Don doesn’t know how to sell a double elbow to the jaw (hint: FALL DOWN!) and instead hits Vito low to take over. The champs take over on the now legal Ron (does it matter if he’s legal in a No DQ match?) and hit something like the H Bomb for two. Don can’t even hit Johnny from the apron properly (it looked like he was messing with his hair) but it’s enough for Ron to take over for the first time.

Don side slams Johnny for two but the Bull is able to make the tag so Vito can fire off his good looking kicks. A top rope elbow gets two on Ron and a Hart Attack gets the same. Back in and the H Bomb gets two on Vito with Johnny making the save. Disco sneaks in with a belt shot to Ron for two but Don lays everyone out with the belt and the H Bomb to Vito gives the Twins the titles. Lucky us.

Rating: D. So the boring team just beat the ok team to win the titles. Like I said, lucky us. It was a watchable match but there was no need for this to be No DQ. The Twins are one of the least interesting teams that I’ve seen in a long time and I have no idea who decided they should be in the main event scene.

Finlay admits that the better man won tonight and wants Vampiro to keep that fire burning.

Ric Flair praises Lex Luger again because that’s all he knows how to do anymore.

We recap Dustin Rhodes vs. Terry Funk, which is over how tough Dustin is compared to his daddy and then something about beating him over the head with a chicken.

Dustin says tonight is Funk’s retirement match and he’ll admit that Dustin is the American Nightmare.

Dustin Rhodes vs. Terry Funk

Bullrope match, which is TOTALLY different than the strap match later. Terry comes out with the chicken as this feud built around someone who doesn’t even work for the company continues. Funk says he has Dustin’s baby brother here and it’s a guy in a chicken suit. Even Tony seems to find this stupid. Dustin chases the chicken and walks into a left hand from the chicken in Terry’s hand.

They’re not attached yet so Terry whips him with the rope. A cowbell to the head gets two for Terry but Dustin hits him low to take over. They’re still not tied together so Dustin just hits Terry in the head over and over with the bell. They finally tie it up and Dustin gets two off a DDT. A bulldog onto the cowbell gets two for Dustin and here’s the guy in the chicken suit again. Dustin quickly lays him out for the sake of good taste but Terry crotches him on the top rope to slow Rhodes down.

There’s a low blow with the cowbell (Madden: “That’ll hurt your ding a ling.”) Funk grabs the mic and says he’s making this an I Quit match. The referee says no and gets a cowbell to the head. Dustin takes a bunch of cowbells to the head and Dustin quits. However, that doesn’t count because this is pinfall or submission only and quitting doesn’t count. I mean just……no wait, I don’t know what I mean because THAT MAKES NO SENSE. Anyway, Terry argues with the referee, allowing Dustin to hit Terry in the head with a cowbell before a piledriver onto the bell is enough to give Rhodes the pin.

Rating: D-. Good night just end this show already. I have no idea why I was supposed to care about this but I guess these families feuded like twenty years ago and since Terry Funk doesn’t know how to retire, the thing is still going. This wasn’t interesting and was all about the whole TEXAS IS AWESOME theme, which is really annoying if you’re not from Texas.

They keep fighting post match until they just stop.

Sid is ready for Jarrett.

Recap of Sting vs. Luger, which is over Luger breaking everyone’s arm, starting with Sting.

Total Package vs. Sting

This is a lumberjack match with everyone whose arm Luger has broken surrounding the ring, plus anyone Luger could find who was willing to wear a cast as well. Tony: “Mark Madden is not wearing pants.” It took you an hour and forty five minutes to notice that???Before the match, Luger tries to calm the situation down by apologizing to everyone whose arm has been broken recently.

Luger jumps Sting before he can get the trench coat (it’s not a cape Tony) off. Sting slugs him out to the floor but it’s right in front of the heel lumberjacks. Back in and Sting goes into his greatest hits catalog but the big jumping elbow ACTUALLY CONNECTS. Madden thinks Sting’s acting career is taking off to the point that he could be the next Alicia Silverstone. Luger is sent outside and the good guys, including Doug Dillinger, stomps him down. Madden: “CALL SECURITY!”

Back in and Luger sends Sting to the heel side for the same treatment. Cue Tank Abbott to punch out Dillinger, causing the lumberjacks to finally give up and brawl to the back. Luger slaps on a chinlock as only Vampiro is left at ringside. This brings out Flair to fight Vampiro as Sting makes his comeback.

Flair comes in to rake Sting’s eyes but gets splashed in the corner. Liz sneaks in with a ball bat shot to Sting’s shoulder but Jimmy Hart runs in to take Liz away. Sting kicks out at two, with the referee having to pause a bit because Sting wasn’t kicking out in time. There’s the Torture Rack but Vampiro hits Luger in the back with the bat, setting up the Death Drop for the pin.

Rating: F. How in the world are these two considered legends if this is as good as they can do? This was a HUGE mess with way too much interference and Sting looks like a loser who needed a save to make the win, even though it’s been treated like a huge victory for Sting. For some reason though, Luger is going to keep getting pushed and Flair is going to continue to be his lackey because WCW.

Vampiro and Sting hug post match. This could be a big rub for Vampiro.

Tank Abbott is asked why he hit Doug Dillinger. Tank: “Because he’s in the computer.”

We recap Jarrett vs. Sid, which is all about Jarrett hitting Sid with a lot of guitars.

The limo is opened as we’re told that the last two matches have been swapped.

Sid is surprised that he’s up next and runs off to fight. This was a totally unnecessary ten second segment.

WCW World Title: Jeff Jarrett vs. Sid Vicious

Sid is defending. Before the match, Jeff says the girls will strip if he wins the title. Sid clotheslines him down to start and hits ten horrible right hands in the corner. Another clothesline puts Jeff on the floor and it’s already time to brawl. They head into the crowd and then up by the entrance with Sid in full control. Cue the Harris Twins to beat Sid down and give Jeff control.

Back in and Jarrett slugs away, earning himself a warning for clinched fists. The sleeper has Sid in trouble but he fights out and punches Jarrett out of the air. A big boot puts Jeff down but one of the Twins offers a distraction. The other Twin gets on the apron with the belt, only to have Jeff go face first into the gold for two. Another distraction lets Jeff get in a guitar shot as crooked referee Slick Johnson comes in to count. Hogan makes the save at two and cleans house to give Sid the easy pin to retain. Much like Sting, some hero.

Rating: D-. I guess this was their way of trying to keep the fans awake during the most boring title match in recorded history but it really didn’t do the trick. Instead this was messy and a borderline disaster, only saved by the fact that this was less than eight minutes long. Thankfully that’s it for Sid vs. Jeff but unfortunately it’s about a month too late.

Hogan and Sid get beaten down so here’s Flair to start the main event in a hurry.

Hulk Hogan vs. Ric Flair

This is a Yappapi strap match, which means strap match plus all the racist overtones you can find. It’s the four corners variety to make sure no one has to actually do a job (and by no one of course I mean Flair because Hogan isn’t losing to Flair as a face). Flair beats on him for a bit before they get tied up and it’s to the outside where Hogan takes over. Back in and Hulk chokes a bit as we hear about Flair still being upset over Bash at the Beach 1994. Flair chokes a lot but Hogan kicks him low.

The chops have no effect (Flair: “OH GOD I’M SORRY!”) and Hogan chokes even more. Now it’s time for punching and biting in the corner before Flair rakes the eyes. Using his new found advantage, Flair goes up top and gets slammed down. Jimmy Hart gets in some strap shots of his own and Ric is busted open.

They fight up to the ramp and here’s Luger to blast Hogan with a chair. Now Hulk is busted open too and a low blow stops his latest comeback attempt. Back in and Flair punches and chokes until Jimmy’s latest rescue attempt fails. The camera pans over and, I kid you not, the bottom section of chairs, as in the first probably twenty rows, is about 75% empty. Even TNA doesn’t have that kind of issues today.

Flair busts out the brass knuckles to knock Hogan out for two. Not two buckles or anything, but a two count, because even the wrestlers and referee don’t get the rules. Hulk makes his comeback, touches three buckles, beats up Luger again (with a boot to the hand), drops a leg on Flair for a pin, and touches the fourth corner after the bell to make it clear that he wins.

Rating: F. In the year 2000, the wrestlers and referees couldn’t figure out the rules, there was a ton of interference and Hogan somehow beat Flair twice in the same one fall match. This main evented a pay per view just two weeks before Wrestlemania. Horrible main event and a perfect ending to such an awful pay per view.

Overall Rating: F-. This was one of the worst shows I can remember and that’s what I fully expected coming in. I don’t think this one requires a long winded explanation, but here’s one of the major issues: this show runs 2:34 with 11 matches. Only two matches break nine minutes. How can WCW look at this and actually think this is the best they can do? I know the reboot is coming soon and after this, there’s almost no way they could keep going in this direction.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of NXT Reviews: The Full Sail Years Volume I at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B011T13PV4

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6