Monday Night Raw
Date: May 10, 1993
Location: Manhattan Center, New York City, New York
Attendance: 1,000
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Randy Savage, Bobby Heenan

It’s the start of a fresh taping cycle with a rematch for the Intercontinental Title. Jim Duggan wasn’t happy with losing his first shot at Shawn Michaels due to countout so we have a lumberjack match this time around. We’re also getting ready for the King of the Ring, meaning more qualifying matches. Let’s get to it.

Earlier tonight, Shawn Michaels was talking about the title match when Mr. Perfect jumps him, starting a fight that winds up on a car (Howard Finkel’s to be exact).

Opening sequence.

The announcers argue over their favorite lumberjacks.

King of the Ring Tournament Qualifying Match: Typhoon vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

They bounce off each other to start (duh) so Typhoon slams him. Typhoon gets in a few more big shots until he gets sent into the post to really change control. It’s off to the big fat chinlock and we take a break. Back with Bigelow hitting a Samoan drop, followed by the flying headbutt for the pin.

Rating: D-. What else were you expecting here? Bigelow was actually talented and getting a push around this time so it makes a lot more sense to have him go over the waste of a roster spot that is Typhoon. That waste would be over shortly though as Typhoon left and became the Shockmaster very soon after this.

The Smoking Gunns are coming.

Yokozuna vs. P.J. Walker

That’s Justin Credible. Minus the bad hair cut, Walker does have a great look and could have been a Marty Jannetty style guy if he never went to ECW. An early belly to belly suplex sets up the big leg, followed by the Banzai Drop for the easy pin. On Walker if that’s not really clear.

King of the Ring Report focusing on the tournament. It’s so odd to see Gene Okerlund looking somewhat young. Well, younger at least.

Mr. Perfect vs. Iron Mike Sharpe

For some reason Perfect hits on the rather hefty Raw Girl, only to throw his gum in her mouth. She seems to like it so the announcers hit the UNCOOKED, UNCUT, UNCENSORED line. Perfect dropkicks Mike to the floor and rains down some right hands in the corner. Sharpe comes out of the corner and they chop the heck out of each other with Perfect getting the better of it. The fans are doing the wave so Heenan starts watching TV in an odd bit. Heenan is looking for “that movie where the girl goes to Dallas”, and I’m assuming you get that joke for yourself. The PerfectPlex wraps Sharpe up.

Rating: C. This actually wasn’t half bad with Sharpe being the kind of guy with enough experience to make a go of it. I can live with a slightly more energetic squash as it’s a lot better to have something with some effort instead of just having someone get broken in half and then hit with a finisher.

Cannonball Kid vs. Mr. Hughes

That would be Lightning Kid from last week. Hughes brings out Harvey Wippleman as his new manager. A powerslam sets up a two handed chokeslam as this is more dominance. Hughes kicks him in the face and finishes with a Boss Man Slam. The name changes are at least something interesting and might be leading to something.

Intercontinental Title: Jim Duggan vs. Shawn Michaels

Michaels is defending and this is a lumberjack match. During his entrance, Duggan goes outside and drops Yokozuna with one punch. TAKE THAT HOGAN! Shawn comes out on crutches and something seems to be afoot. Er….maybe aknee or aleg. Mr. Perfect doesn’t buy it and throws Shawn inside with the knee looking just fine.

Jim goes right after him and holds Shawn up for a good while before the slam. The fans call Shawn gay as Duggan gets two off a suplex. We hit some choking in the corner and Shawn is getting destroyed so far. Right hands in the corner knock Shawn silly and Duggan tosses him outside as I remember this is a lumberjack match. Shawn is thrown back inside and we take a break.

Back with Duggan missing a knee to FINALLY give Shawn a breather. Shawn removes his boot and knocks Duggan silly (Wouldn’t it make more sense to have a foot inside the boot?) before Jim runs into another boot in the corner. It’s off to the chinlock for a bit before Duggan comes back with more clotheslines and a slam. Duggan’s chinlock doesn’t do much but Shawn knocks him into Bigelow on the apron. Yokozuna adds a huge leg on the floor but Perfect comes in for the DQ.

Rating: D. The problem with these early Raw’s is they try to stretch out matches that have no business being stretched. Counting commercials, this went about twenty minutes. Did ANYONE want to see Duggan go that long at any point past about 1984? It wasn’t the worst match ever but the lumberjacks were only there for the ending, which isn’t the most interesting thing in the world.

The lumberjacks brawl to end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. A five and a half minute Mike Sharpe match isn’t enough to save this one and that really shouldn’t be much of a surprise. These shows are all about the big match and Jim Duggan in a match this long isn’t going to make that work. We need to actually get to something interesting soon because these shows aren’t working at the moment.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: May 3, 1993
Location: Manhattan Center, New York City, New York
Attendance: 1,000
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Randy Savage, Bobby Heenan

It’s another fresh month here as I’m hoping to start doing more of these. This is very early in the show’s run as we’re not even going to hit episode twenty by the end of the month. It’s also coming up on the first King of the Ring but there’s a good chance a lot of the tournament will take place on Superstars, which was still the major show for the most part. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Intercontinental Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Jim Duggan

Duggan is challenging and is in his weird singlet phase here. Shawn bails to the floor to start as the stalling is very obvious here. Back in and we hit some clotheslines before Shawn goes over to mess with Duggan’s board. Duggan won’t let him walk out and we take a break.

Back with Duggan getting his throat snapped across the top rope, followed by a few kneedrops. Some elbows get two and it’s off to the chinlock. Shawn cuts off a comeback with a knee to the ribs as this is in need of some caffeine. What it doesn’t need is a snapmare into another chinlock. Duggan fights up again and hits a few big right hands. A very spinning slam sends Shawn out to the floor and they walk around a lot for the double countout.

Rating: D. Far too much chinlockery here which is so often the case around here. Yeah it was an eleven minute match but that doesn’t mean it’s the right idea. It made for a very long and dull match as Duggan wasn’t about to win the title and his offense was almost all brawling. Shawn is a borderline miracle worker but he needs a little more than this.

Duggan doesn’t think this is fair and wants a rematch so he sits in the ring.

King of the Ring Report with a look at the updated qualifying matches. Not much to see here but I miss these things.

Doink the Clown vs. Kamikaze Kid

Now this is an interesting one as the Kid is making his debut after being one of the hottest indy acts in the country. However he’s been tweaked a bit as he was better known as the Lightning Kid (with his tights saying L. Kid) but now he’s under a new name. You would know him better as the 1-2-3 Kid or X-Pac. Doink runs him over to start and grabs an STF. A few elbow drops set up the Stump Puller (Doink sits on his neck and pulls back on the leg) for the submission.

Apparently Duggan is on the phone with President Jack Tunney. I’m as riveted as you are.

Bob Backlund vs. Dwayne Gill

They slowly circle to start with Backlund tripping him down a few times. That goes nowhere so let’s talk about Duggan getting his rematch against Michaels next week in a lumberjack match. Gill hiptosses him down and grabs the shortarm scissors so Backlund can do the power up spot. A bridging cradle (with two thumbs up) gives Bob the pin.

Rating: D+. Not much you can say here but it could have been worse. I know Backlund has won a lot of matches in his day but he just beat GILLBERG. This was fine enough as a way to kill some time but I don’t think anyone was buying Backlund as anything interesting at this point.

Duggan says he’ll beat Shawn in a fight instead of a match. This leads to an explanation of a lumberjack match for the really slow fans.

The Smoking Gunns are coming and like to shoot things in the desert. These vignettes need to come back, albeit in a slightly less cheesy form.

Headshrinkers vs. Jim Bell/Jay Savage

Lou Albano comes out for commentary as a surprise and goes on a rant about how he doesn’t trust Heenan. Bobby: “I’m not a demented halfwit where you put his brain in a pigeon and he flies upside down!” Sledge gets tossed into the air for a big crash and now we talk about the lumberjacks to ignore the match even more.

A spike piledriver only draws an OH NO and it’s back to Albano bantering. Normally I would make fun of this but what else is there to talk about during a squash? Albano speaks…..whatever language the Headshrinkers speak and tries to get them to follow the rules. The destruction continues and it’s a double Stroke into Fatu’s Superfly Splash for the pin.

Rating: D. This was all about the angle with Albano wanting to turn the Headshrinkers towards the light and there’s nothing wrong with that. I’d much rather they take a squash and turn it into a story instead of just wasting our time like most matches such as this one. Then again it might just be because I’m a Headshrinker fan.

Home improvement with the Bushwhackers from Smack Em Whack Em, which is pretty easily the best Coliseum Video ever.

Kamala vs. Rich Myers

Kamala’s manager Slick isn’t here this week for no apparent reason. The tossing around begins and we hit some choking. A superkick sets up the big splash and the fans remind Kamala to turn the jobber over for the pin.

Shawn is annoyed to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. The chinlocking in the Intercontinental Title match really hurt things here but it could have been a lot worse. 1993 just isn’t that interesting and there’s really not much of a way around that. There isn’t much to say here as there’s over a month before the next pay per view and that doesn’t leave a lot to talk about week to week.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the History of the WWE’s Big Four Pay Per Views, now in PAPERBACK. Check out the information here:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: September 2, 2002
Location: Bradley Center, Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

So uh, we don’t have a World Champion around here anymore because Brock Lesnar is the second latest casualty of the Brand Wars. The latest casualty is the Undertaker, who went back to Smackdown when Stephanie basically just told him to come because that’s how this era works. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Eric Bischoff to open things up and he’s got a briefcase. Bischoff gets right to the point: Raw needs a champion so here’s the REAL #1 contender: HHH. Eric praises HHH by saying WCW would have won the Monday Night Wars with HHH on their side. HHH takes credit for running Lesnar off and says his wife knew what was best for the company (Wouldn’t that be signing HHH?).

It’s time for the briefcase which contains the Big Gold Belt because HHH is the brand new World Heavyweight Champion (Thereby beginning its lineage. I’ve heard people say it’s the same lineage as the WCW and/or NWA World Titles and it’s still nonsense. This belt began here and that’s all there is to it.).

HHH starts in on the big speech and here’s Ric Flair to cut him off. No one ever handed him a title in a briefcase (True. When Kevin Nash literally gave him the title for reign #16, there was no briefcase involved.) so Flair thinks he should get a title shot tonight. Bischoff makes the match and both guys say it’s going to be an honor. Are we in TNA all of a sudden? HHH gets in a cheap shot before leaving.

Post break, HHH and Bubba Ray Dudley run into each other and Bubba is declared jealous. HHH talks about how Bubba could be champion one day. Bubba isn’t pleased and calls the belt Raw’s salvation before saying he’ll win the title soon enough. Uh, right.

Bubba Ray Dudley/Trish Stratus vs. Molly Holly/Christopher Nowinski

Tables match. Earlier today, Chris said that after their opponents are put through tables, he’ll burst through something else. I’ll quote the following line: “And by that, I mean Molly’s hymen.” What is with these disturbing stories involving Molly? First she’s fat (not really but whatever), then she’s horrible because she’s a virgin and now it’s about taking her virginity. I know they need characters but this is ridiculous.

The guys start with Nowinski actually taking over before it’s off to Molly. That means a failed powerbomb attempt as Molly grabs a waistlock. King: “What’s that? The hymen maneuver?” It leads to some dancing as Molly’s pointless humiliation continues. I speak too soon as Bully takes her pants down (King: “IS THAT HER HYMEN???”), allowing Trish to get in a few spanks.

A WE WANT PUPPIES chant starts up as Molly gets in a neckbreaker, only to have Trish grab her own to put both women down. Bubba comes in and cleans Nowinski’s clock, giving us the “Chris falls into Molly’s crotch” spot. Chris takes What’s Up and it’s finally table time. The Molly Go Round drops Trish but Bubba saves her from the table. Nowinski misses a splash to drive himself through a table and that counts as an elimination, likely as the referee wants this to end. Molly is sent through to finally end this.

Rating: No. In every possible sense of the word, no. This wasn’t funny, this wasn’t amusing, this wasn’t something that belongs on any wrestling show ever. Just imagine someone saying ANY of these jokes on a wrestling show today and think how long they would last before being fired. This was horrible and I feel so sorry for Molly having to deal with this nonsense.

Christian and Lance Storm don’t think much of American pride or Kane for that matter either. Storm laughs off the idea of such a fat country celebrating Labor Day. Test teases more flag burning.

Bischoff gives Terri and Stacy a lingerie pillow fight. Eric gets a preview of their attire and makes various jokes.

Chris Jericho yells at Flair for getting the title shot but Ric brings up Jericho tapping out at Summerslam. Jericho hopes Flair wins so he can get the title back. These two have good chemistry together.

William Regal vs. Booker T.

Regal slugs away to start but King wants to talk about the pillow fight. Booker’s right hands don’t have much effect as Regal knocks him to the floor. Back in and the Regal Cutter gets two, only to get caught by Booker’s collection of kicks for the pin.

Rating: D+. Well…it could have been worse. The problem here is that there’s no real reason to have the match but at least the right guy won. Regal hasn’t been doing anything of note in recent weeks but Booker is getting more and more over every week. I mean, it would be nice if they went somewhere with that (say, across a few continents, like something INTERCONTINENTAL, but that’s just nonsense of course) but for now it’s just Spinaroonis all around.

Booker does the Spinarooni.

We look back at Shawn Michaels winning at Summerslam but getting attacked by HHH.

Shawn is in a wheelchair and doesn’t know if he’ll ever get his mobility back (though he does have feeling in his legs). What he does know is that it was all worth it and as far as HHH goes, what goes around comes around. Shawn picks up a sledgehammer and stares.

HHH is rubbing the title and smiling way too much.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Ric Flair

HHH is defending of course. Flair quickly takes him down so we can hit the technical sequence. One heck of a chop sends HHH to the floor before it’s time to work on the arm for a bit. The technical, which means boring here, pace continues as HHH stomps in the corner and whips Flair over the corner and out to the floor.

HHH cranks up the speed with a suplex so Flair gives him a belly to back version. The kneedrop misses and HHH very, VERY slowly starts working on it but makes sure to walk around a bit in between. The Figure Four is countered into a small package for two on HHH, followed by an Irish whip into a chop. I’m still waiting on them to top that suplex.

A very basic whip into the corner sets up a way too big bump over the corner to send HHH to the floor. Back in and the shinbreaker sets up the Figure Four but HHH makes the ropes. The referee is sent to the floor, low blow, Pedigree and the title is retained. It’s as sudden as it sounds.

Rating: D-. I can accept the idea of a slower paced match but this felt like two seventy year olds who were on a reunion show. I’m sure HHH had a blast wrestling a rather old school style match against Flair but isn’t one big present enough in one night? HHH can be entertaining but this was taking everything that made him work (as a heel that is) and putting it in slow motion.

Post match Jericho comes out to put Flair in the Walls but Rob Van Dam makes a save.

Big Show yells at Bischoff, demanding to be #1 contender. Bischoff says go impress him and Show leaves. Eric gets a call and yells in his exposition voice that someone is jumping from Raw to join a family member on Smackdown.

Kane vs. Lance Storm/Christian

Kane shrugs off a double team and throws Storm at Christian for the early advantage. The slow (WAY too common of a theme tonight) pace begins again with Kane getting beaten down in the corner, allowing some cheap double teaming to put him down for two. The Unprettier is broken up and an electric chair puts Christian down. Kane’s comeback is cut off by even more double teaming as this is just BORING. How can you have three talented guys putting on such an uninteresting match? Storm superkicks Christian by mistake and it’s a chokeslam for the pin.

Rating: D. The Tag Team Champions, as in the ONLY Tag Team Champions in the company, just got beat clean in less than six minutes by someone who hasn’t had a match in four months. Normally I would call this an issue of the era but champions losing will always be an issue in WWE.

Post match Test tries to burn the flag but Bradshaw returns for the save. Oh. Great.

Big Show vs. Tommy Dreamer

Show throws him around with ease, then throws him around with no effort, followed by throwing him around like he’s nothing. The referee tells him not to use a chair though so Dreamer uses it and Show wins via DQ.

Dreamer beats the heck out of Show because we’re to the point where TOMMY DREAMER might be an option.

HHH wants to fight RVD tonight (HHH? Wanting to have three major segments on one show? You don’t say!) so Bischoff makes a tag with HHH/Jericho vs. Flair/Van Dam. At least Jericho and HHH argue to keep up some continuity.

Jeff Hardy vs. Crash

…..Crash is the one jumping isn’t he? This show has been so bad and so dull that it would be the only possible choice. Bischoff comes out before the bell and accuses Jeff of being the jumper so he sends out 3 Minute Warning for the big beatdown.

Jeff gets destroyed and OF COURSE CRASH IS THE ONE LEAVING. Bischoff is shocked because someone whose last (non-instant Hardcore Title match) win on Raw was in June 2001 is jumping to Raw.

Stacy Keibler vs. Terri

There’s a carpet, bed and pillows in the ring with Jerry Lawler doing running commentary. There’s spanking, stuffed animals, a slam onto a bed, a Bronco Buster and a rollup gives Terri the pin in less than two minutes. Holy sweet goodness END THIS SHOW ALREADY.

Post match Stacy hits her with a loaded pillow and covers her with a bucket of oil, which just happened to be underneath the ring. Feathering ensues. I’m so glad they had Stacy stop being the sexy assistant (as in the role she was born to play) to be….whatever this is.

HHH/Chris Jericho vs. Rob Van Dam/Ric Flair

Van Dam goes after the heels before Flair can come out for no apparent reason, meaning Ric gets to make the save. We settle down to Jericho suplexing Van Dam for two so Lawler starts talking about the hymen again. Flair struts in as we hit the WOO before Jericho easily drops him. HHH gets in some right hands of his own but Jericho crotches himself, allowing the hot tag off to Van Dam.

One heck of a chair shot drops Rob but the fans are too busy chanting FOZZY SUCKS. Van Dam takes every main event tag team beating that you’ve ever seen in about three minutes until HHH throws Flair to the floor. Rob comes back with a few kicks to HHH but Jericho breaks up the Five Star. The Lionsault gives HHH two and Flair puts Jericho in the Figure Four on the outside. That allows HHH to bring in the title and very blatantly hold it up for the Van Daminator. The Five Star puts HHH away.

Rating: D+. See? He puts people over! All it took was a belt shot and Van Dam being fresh while HHH was in his second match. The match wasn’t half bad actually and sets up the title shot, but it’s WAY too late to save this show, especially with a match that wasn’t all that great in the first place.

Overall Rating: F. This was horrible and I have no idea how else to describe it. Between making jokes about taking Molly’s virginity and King going on and on about her various body parts to HHH taking his sweet time getting the World Title to the AWFUL Flair vs. HHH match to the pillow fight to a story about Crash freaking Holly (good thing he was on the show tonight) to the Tag Team Champions doing a clean job, I can’t think of a single good thing on this show. I’ll give Bischoff this much: I feel like I’m watching Nitro more and more every single week.

This show got as close to breaking me as anything has in a good while. It felt like there was no effort being put in here other than to amuse the people who put it together while making HHH into the most boring top star in history. I really could not stand this show and if this is where we’re going for the next several months, they’re in a lot of trouble.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the History of the WWE’s Big Four Pay Per Views, now in PAPERBACK. Check out the information here:

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This actually requires some backstory. 

There are actually two versions of this show but only one ever saw the light of day. The original show was scheduled for Sunday, May 26 in Florence, South Carolina. After the first match aired as scheduled, a bad thunderstorm rolled into the area and knocked out the power to the arena. The PPV feed cut out and the fans missed about an hour of the show. It did come back on in time for the main event, but no one saw the middle four matches. Those matches actually took place in the dark but to the best of my knowledge they weren’t filmed.

Obviously this wasn’t fair to the people who paid for the show, so the company held a second PPV in North Charleston, South Carolina on Tuesday, May 28^th. The show featured the two matches from the original show and three new matches that aired live. The airing of the matches was a little odd as the world title match was aired second on the second PPV while the rest of the matches were aired after, meaning the last thing on the PPV is an Intercontinental Title match instead of the WWF World Title match.

In Your House #8: Beware of Dog
Date: May 26/28, 1998
Location: Florence Civic Center, Florence, South Carolina/North Charleston Coliseum, North Charleston, South Carolina
Attendance: 6,000/4,500
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler/Jim Ross, Mr. Perfect

Other than the Shawn vs. Bulldog match, the biggest match here is probably a Caribbean strap match between Savio Vega and newcomer Steve Austin. Austin isn’t a big star yet but it’s clear that the potential is there and that he could become something very big if he’s given the right amount of time. Vega was his first major feud and tonight is the blowoff between the two of them. Let’s get to it.

The opening video talks about Shawn while also focusing on the allegations of him breaking up Bulldog’s marriage.

Vince thanks the people that keep us free to be here tonight, which I’d assume is a shout out to the military.

Hunter Hearst Helmsley vs. Marc Mero

Mero is former WCW wrestler Johnny B. Badd who jumped to the WWF at Wrestlemania. These two started feuding that night over the way Helmsley treated his valet Sable and this is their final showdown. It’s a brawl to start before Mero’s theme music is even off. Mero takes him into the corner and pounds away before punching Helmsley out to the floor. A big plancha over the top takes Helmsley down again and we head back inside for a two count.

Helmsley pokes him in the eye to get a breather but gets flipped upside down in the corner for another near fall. Mero misses a charge and goes shoulder first into the post followed by Helmsley throwing him shoulder first into another post to really take over. A DDT on the arm stays on the bad shoulder as Vince warns of potential technical difficulties due to the storm but promising that they won’t last long. Mero gets pounded down and Vince isn’t pleased with the officiating so far.

A jumping knee to the face gets two on Mero and it’s off to another armbar. Mero tries to come back with a backslide but the arm gives out, allowing Helmsley to wrap it around the post again. The arm goes around the post a fourth time and Mero is in big trouble. Helmsley wraps the arm around the ropes and rams it into the buckle before putting on a cross armbreaker of all things.

After nearly a minute in the hold Mero is able to get to a rope, drawing almost no reaction from the crowd. They don’t seem all that interested in what’s going on, even though this is good stuff so far. Helmsley drops a knee onto the arm and puts on an armbar for a few moments. The shoulder is sent into the buckle again but Mero grabs a quick rollup with his feet under Helmsley’s arms for two. Helmsley wraps the arm around the ropes again and drops a top rope ax handle into the shoulder. That arm is being destroyed so far.

A hammerlock slam puts Mero down again but he gets up fast enough to crotch Helmsley on the top rope. Mero is able to snap off a top rope hurricanrana to put both guys down as the arm is too banged up. Helmsley gets taken down with a headscissors and a running knee lift before a top rope sunset flip (one of Mero’s finishers) is good for two.

Mero sends him to the floor and tries a flip dive over the ropes, only for Helmsley to move, injuring Mero’s knee in the process. Back inside and Helmsley loads up the Pedigree but Sable covers her eyes, making Helmsley drop the move. He demands that she watch but the delay lets Mero counter the second attempt into a catapult into the post for the pin out of nowhere.

Rating: B. This was a really nice surprise with both guys looking great out there. I loved seeing Mero wrestle with one arm as so often you’ll see someone have a limb injured and then just hold it while wrestling as usual. Very good showing here and a good example of letting the young guys set up the rest of the show in style.

Camp Cornette has a big surprise for Shawn but for now he’ll just get a smaller one: Owen Hart has a one night only manager license so he’ll be at ringside with the Bulldog.

Remember that the following match happened about an hour after the previous match.

Shawn says that he’s ready for the match but as he’s walking to the ring, Mr. Perfect smirks at him for some reason. They have a history together but haven’t had any issues for years.

WWF World Title: British Bulldog vs. Shawn Michaels

Before the match, attorney Clarence Mason says that Shawn has tried to break up the Smith family so he’ll be filing a lawsuit against Shawn for “attempted alienation of affection.” Shawn is given the subpena, rips it up, and gets jumped from behind to get things going. That’s about the extent of this story and no one remembered it after the show. Shawn slides between the Bulldog’s legs and pounds away, sending Smith to the floor to run away from the kick.

Michaels dives over the top to take Bulldog out and we head back inside so they can circle each other. Shawn grabs a headlock to take him down to the mat with the hold lasting for a good while. Back up and Bulldog grabs a quickly broken bearhug, only to drop down to avoid a charging Shawn and getting caught in a rollup for two. Shawn goes to a short arm scissors but Smith rolls over and lifts Shawn into the air in the same counter he made famous against Shawn back in 1992.

Bulldog stomps Shawn down a bit more and poses for good measure. We hit the chinlock before the Bulldog puts on an over the shoulder backbreaker to stay on the back. The Bulldog slams him down and hits a Samoan drop to keep Shawn in trouble. Off to another chinlock as Owen goes around ringside talking trash about Shawn.

While in the hold, something clearly goes wrong with Shawn. The referee then gets up and goes over to the timekeeper, completely ignoring the hold. Allegedly this was saying that the match’s time had been cut due to the technical issues and Shawn was throwing a fit. Great way to react by the champion there. Anyway Shawn fights up and escapes the hold but misses a charge and falls out to the floor in a heap. Bulldog rams him into the announce table as well as the apron before heading back inside for a breather.

Shawn fights back and scores with a slingshot clothesline from the apron to put both guys down again. Back up and they hit heads to knock both guys down for the third time. Shawn is up first and scores with the flying forearm before nipping up. A top rope ax handle gets two but the Bulldog accidentally runs over the referee, knocking him out to the floor.

Shawn hits the top rope elbow but has to take out Owen instead of superkicking Smith. Another referee comes out as Smith loads up the powerslam but Shawn escapes. The champion hits a belly to back suplex and all four shoulders are down. The second referee gets back in and we have a double pin.

Rating: B-. This was a solid match and set up the rematch well enough. That being said, this would have felt better if it came at the end of the show rather than in the middle, but you can’t blame the company for a bad storm. Good stuff here though with Shawn looking good and Bulldog being a good opponent for him. It also reenforces the idea that Diesel just wasn’t all that good in the ring as Smith has had his second solid title match in a few months.

Post match both guys are announced as winners by different referees. President Gorilla Monsoon comes to the ring and we get a lot of replays which show the same double pin over and over again. Since it’s a tie, Shawn retains the title but there will be a rematch next month.

Everything from this point on is from Tuesday’s show and is airing live on PPV instead of being taped.

Savio Vega vs. Steve Austin

This is a Caribbean strap match, meaning they’re tied at the wrist and the first person to touch all four corners without interruption is the winner. Austin debuted a few months prior and is just the Ringmaster at this point, meaning he’s as generic of a heel as you could ask for. There’s potential there, but the gimmick is crippling him. The idea here is that it’s Savio’s signature match and if he wins, Austin’s manager Ted DiBiase leaves the company forever. DiBiase has a chauffeur’s hat which goes on Savio if he loses.

Austin immediately bails to the floor to start before coming back in to pound away on Vega. Savio comes back with a backdrop and Austin bails to the floor, only to have Savio pull the strap to send him ribs first into the apron. Back in and Vega whips Austin’s back with the strap and Steve just tries to get out of the ring to safety. Savio suplexes Austin back inside and the strap goes across the chest even more. Vega gets two corners but Austin trips him up to stop the streak, thereby erasing the two corners Savio touched.

Now it’s Austin’s turn to whip Vega but Savio pulls him to the mat and they go outside again. Austin gets in a HARD whip to the back before sending him back first into the barricade. Steve pulls him back up onto the apron to try and hang Savio but opts to just whip his chest instead. The strap is wrapped around Savio’s ankle so Austin can drag him around the ring but Vega breaks it up just before the third corner.

Savio starts whipping Austin again but gets backdropped out to the floor before he can get too far. The strap comes back to haunt Austin again though as Vega pulls him to the floor instead of giving Austin a breather. Vega suplexes Austin on the floor and takes him back inside where he ties Austin’s arm and leg together. Austin makes a stop and just goes nuts with the whip to take Savio’s breath away. Vega somehow gets up and crotches Austin down on the top, setting up a great looking superplex.

Savio slaps three corners but Austin makes a last second save with a spinebuster. Both guys are down again and Austin’s back is red from those strap shots. Austin chokes Savio across the ropes and with the strap before blasting him in the back for good measure. Austin gets two corners but Vega pokes him in the eyes before the third. They trade tombstone piledriver attempts but Savio falls over the top and out to the floor before either guy can hit one.

Austin hangs Savio over the ropes yet again before going up top, only to be pulled down onto the barricade. Savio pulls him into the post before taking Austin back inside for a fireman’s carry. Austin puts up a fight after two buckles but it isn’t counted as breaking the momentum so Steve pulls him down after the third. A piledriver lays out Vega again but DiBiase wants another one. Savio counters into a backdrop but Austin comes back with his Million Dollar Dream sleeper.

Vega manages to stay on his feet so Austin jumps on his back. Savio walks around and gets two corners, only to climb up the ropes and drive Austin back first onto the mat for the break. Austin comes right back with more choking, wrapping the strap around Savio’s throat and pulling him across. Steve gets two but Savio slaps both of them as he passes by. Both guys get number three so it’s next buckle wins. In a very interesting ending, they get in a tug of war over the last corner but Austin looks down at DiBiase and catapults Savio into the buckle to lose the match but also intentionally get rid of DiBiase.

Rating: A-. This is by far the best four corners strap match I’ve ever seen. They beat the tar out of each other and the story made it even better. Steve intentionally losing makes him look very smart and all the more evil because he’s willing to throw DiBiase out the door to make himself a bigger star in the future. Really good stuff here.

Savio has the fans sing the Goodbye song to DiBiase.

Vader vs. Yokozuna

Vader broke Yokozuna’s leg a few months ago so tonight is about revenge. They slug it out to start with Vader getting the best of it to start, only to have Yokozuna punch him to the floor. Cornette nearly has a fit as Yokozuna is asking for a sumo challenge. Vader gets down in a three point football stance but steps to the side instead of charging ahead. They set up again and Vader does the exact same thing. The third attempt actually happens and Vader goes down like he’s barely even there before Yokozuna clotheslines him out to the floor.

Back in and Vader pounds away at the side of the head, only to have Yokozuna sweep the leg out and fall down on Vader’s leg. Vader rolls to the floor again, making sure we don’t have more than a few consecutive seconds of action in this match. He gets back inside and just pops Yokozuna in the face with right hands. Yokozuna sweeps the leg again and drops another elbow to complete the same sequence we just saw.

This time Vader doesn’t go to the floor but rather get up and pound away on Yokozuna’s back. He can’t slam him though, allowing Yokozuna to come back with a Rock Bottom for no cover. A Samoan drop puts Vader down again but Yokozuna goes after Cornette instead of hitting the Banzai Drop. Vader saves his manager and hits a pair of Vader Bombs for the pin.

Rating: D-. This was nine minutes of the same sequences going over and over until we got to the ending. These battles of huge men rarely go anywhere because there’s only so much they can do. Yokozuna would fade away pretty quickly after this due to his immense weight. He would try for years to get back into the company but he just couldn’t get his weight under control.

Intercontinental Title: Goldust vs. Undertaker

This is a casket match. The video before the match show us the setup of Goldust vs. Ahmed Johnson from last night instead of telling us about Undertaker vs. Goldust. Goldust had given an unconscious Ahmed mouth to mouth, thereby infuriating Johnson. The lights go out (JR: “On purpose this time.”) and Undertaker appears behind Goldust in the ring. Undertaker throws the champion around on the floor before taking him inside for more of the same.

They head back outside again with Goldust being sent into steps. Back inside again as the destruction continues. A legdrop keeps Goldust in trouble and Undertaker hits what would become known as Old School. Goldust comes back with a quick slam and a tombstone of his own but Undertaker sits up almost immediately. The champion puts him in the casket but can’t get the lid shut as Undertaker comes back with right hands. Instead Goldust sends him out to the floor and into the steps before choking with an electrical cord.

Back in and Undertaker gets caught in a bad looking sleeper hold to drag the match down even more. Goldust still can’t get him in the closed casket though as Undertaker blocks two attempts. They head back inside with Undertaker clotheslining both guys out to the floor, only to head back inside where the champion powerslams him down. A middle rope clothesline puts Undertaker down and Goldust goes for a cover out of instinct.

Goldust tries Old School of his own, only to be slammed down with ease. There’s the real Tombstone but Undertaker opens the casket and finds the recently debuted monster Mankind waiting on him. Mankind puts Undertaker in his Mandible Claw submission hold before putting Undertaker inside the casket and closing the lid for the win.

Rating: D. This feud was just a holding pattern for Undertaker until the real feud with Mankind could get going. No one bought Undertaker as a guy who would be in the Intercontinental Title picture for more than a few weeks and that’s exactly what happened. Nothing to see here and not a good way to end the show.

Post match Mankind locks Undertaker inside the casket but as Mankind leaves, smoke starts coming out of the casket. Paul Bearer opens the casket and there’s no one inside. The lights go out again to end the show.

Overall Rating: B+. This is a really solid show with three awesome matches to open things up followed by two that weren’t so good. If you stop the show after the strap match though, you have an awesome PPV with storyline development and awesome action. Really good stuff here….for the first hour or so.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the History of the WWE’s Big Four Pay Per Views, now in PAPERBACK. Check out the information here:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: May 20, 1996
Location: Sioux City Auditorium, Sioux City, Iowa
Attendance: 4,000

Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler

This is going to be the last show of an era as the Curtain Call happened over the weekend but this was taped WAY in advance so the political issues haven’t come up yet. The big story, for whatever reason, continues to be Shawn Michaels vs. British Bulldog over allegations that Shawn went after Bulldog’s wife. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Steve Austin vs. Marc Mero

During the entrances, we’re told about the Godwinns winning the Tag Team Titles over the weekend. How odd is it for that to be a line just thrown in like that? They trade some arm cranking to start with Mero getting the better of it and shrugging off some right hands to the jaw.

An elbow works a bit better and Austin hits a release Snake Eyes to really take over. Austin sends him outside and we take a break as this is really dull stuff so far. It really is amazing how much more exciting Austin would get because this is dreadful at the moment. Back with Austin getting two off the middle rope elbow and grabbing a chinlock.

Mero fights up but gets caught in a jawbreaker, which is totally different from a Stunner (yes, TOTALLY). It’s back to the chinlock for a bit before Mero makes his real comeback with the usual, including right hands in the corner. Austin shoves him out of the corner and goes up, only to have Savio Vega run in to go after Austin for the DQ.

Rating: D-. Sweet goodness what a boring match. Austin was desperate for a change here and thankfully he would get rid of Ted DiBiase very soon after this. The Vega feud was his first good stuff but it would take a lot longer for Mero to really get anywhere. The match was really just long and that doesn’t make it interesting.

Mero and Vega stare at each other.

Video on Ahmed Johnson on the Kuwait tour where he won a tournament.

Video on Ultimate Warrior’s comic book debuting, meaning we get to hear Vince say “destrucity”.

Savio Vega vs. 1-2-3 Kid

Ted DiBiase sits in on commentary and can’t wait to see Savio turned into his chauffeur when Austin beats him on Sunday. Vega hammers away to start as the announcers ignore what’s in the ring to recap Austin vs. Vega on Sunday. A hiptoss puts Kid down and a running spinwheel kick in the corner puts Kid on the floor.

We hit the chinlock back inside until DiBiase offers a distraction with the hat. Apparently that’s enough for Kid to come back, including a clothesline and top rope splash for two. Kid gets two off a spinning kick of his own and they slowly slug it out as this just won’t end. Savio’s belly to back gets two but he gets kicked down yet again. A top rope splash misses though and Savio grabs a rollup for the pin.

Rating: D. Just horrible here again as this is the last show of a taping and that makes for some of the worst wrestling you can see on a weekly basis. There’s no energy here and I’m not even sure how to criticize it. The match was terribly dull but somehow it might have been better than the first one.

Post match Austin comes in and lays out Vega before tying him up so DiBiase can put the chauffeur’s hat on. I can always go for some goof humiliation involving forced clothing.

We recap the Tag Team Title change and the worthless Phineas Loves Sunny story. If nothing else it’s a way to look at Sunny in the white top and skirt. Sunny did however get Phineas to sign a contract to make her the manager, which set up a match against the Smoking Gunns on this Sunday’s pre-show.

Undertaker comes out of a casket for a chat, saying Goldust will be in the casket on Sunday. Cue Mankind to lock Undertaker in the casket as Goldust goes after Paul Bearer. The casket is turned over and beaten with a pole.

British Bulldog vs. Jake Roberts

Before we’re ready to go, Jim Cornette busts out a restraining order against Shawn Michaels on behalf of Diana Smith. This brings out Gorilla Monsoon (King: “You know what they mean: Gorilla Monsoon happens.”) to eject Diana, making the whole thing a waste of time. That means Shawn can come out and watch because Michaels vs. Bulldog needs all the help it can get.

We take an early break and come back with Jake working on the arm as Shawn denies all the allegations against him. Bulldog slowly stomps away as the announcers try to sell this stupid story. It’s off to a leglock because this match needs to be even slower than it’s been so far. The slow leg stomping continues and BACK TO THE LEGLOCK. Jake fights up and tries a DDT but Bulldog reverses into a half crab.

Lawler talks about Shawn being in Playgirl Magazine as we hit the leglock for the third straight time. King: “Did you show as much as you did to Diana?” It’s off to the half crab AGAIN and here’s Diana. We actually take a freaking break and come back with Diana yelling at Shawn. Water is thrown (hitting Shawn in the shoulder) so Michaels punches Cornette and gets jumped from behind and we’re off with no finish. The post break stuff was about thirty seconds long.

Rating: F. Holy cheese steaks served on a book of New York Times crossword puzzles this was a horrible match. This went on and on with that stupid leglock and somehow I’m supposed to want to pay to see Bulldog on Sunday? Terrible stuff here and Jake looked like he has no desire to be out there whatsoever.

Overall Rating: Agoobwa. This would have been better if a massive electrical storm went through the city and knocked out all the power, forcing them to wrestle in the dark. The worst part about this is that there are a lot of talented people on this show. Every one of the six people who actually wrestled are incredibly talented and should be able to put on a great match. The three who appeared but didn’t wrestle were Undertaker, Mankind and Shawn Michaels. That is inexcusable and this show was nothing short of a disaster. No exaggeration: this might actually be the worst episode of Raw I’ve ever seen.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the History of the WWE’s Big Four Pay Per Views, now in PAPERBACK. Check out the information here:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: May 13, 1996
Location: Sioux City Auditorium, Sioux City, Iowa
Attendance: 4,000
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler

Maybe this one can pick things up a bit. Last week’s show was about as uninteresting as you can get as we head towards In Your House VIII and the showdown of Shawn Michaels vs. British Bulldog. The story behind the match is Shawn allegedly sleeping with Bulldog’s wife, which is hardly something that’s going to make me want to pay for a show. Let’s get to it.

Zip vs. Ahmed Johnson

Before the match, Sunny rubs oil on Ahmed’s chest until he calls her trash. Ahmed flips him over to start and scores with some clotheslines but has to stop and yell at Sunny. The BodyDonnas switch places despite THE FACT THAT THEY DON’T LOOK THAT MUCH ALIKE! An electric chair plants Skip and the second switch is caught, allowing Ahmed to finish Skip with the Pearl River Plunge. So Ahmed just basically squashed the Tag Team Champions without blinking an eye.

The Ultimate Warrior, without face paint and talking in a normal voice, shills Warrior University. No, this isn’t an angle and no, no one ever graduated from the school.

Duke Droese vs. Vader

Jim Cornette is on commentary as Vader swats at Duke’s head. Duke actually comes back with a big boot and a crossbody to put both guys on the floor. Back from a break with Vader running him over to restore balance to the universe. A splash sets up a chinlock of all things as this is going WAY longer than it should. Vader gets caught in a jawbreaker for the escape, followed by some clotheslines and a dropkick to put Vader down. A top rope splash misses though and it’s the Vader Bomb to give, well, Vader of course, the pin.

Rating: D. Who in the world thought Vader needed to give up that much offense? Just like last week’s tag match, it’s very clear that this company’s talent pool is just gone right now. Other than the top of the card, the whole company feels like whoever they can throw out there for the sake of filling in the card.

Here are Paul Bearer and Undertaker with the gold casket. See what I mean? The best they can do is Goldust vs. Undertaker. How thrilling is that really supposed to be? Bearer talks about Goldust loving the spotlight so one will shine on the casket after In Your House. Cue Goldust and Marlena to interrupt so Undertaker removes his hat. Goldust hits on Undertaker (“What is that scent? Embalming fluid #5?”) and quotes movie lines to suggest he’d enjoy being in a casket with Undertaker.

Mankind comes in and Claws Undertaker, allowing Goldust to grind on Undertaker’s body and then lick his face. That means choking from the Dead Man as this is just WAY over the top and horrible, meaning Goldust was almost forced to change. He’s not bizarre anymore but rather molesting people against their will.

Justin Hawk Bradshaw vs. Aldo Montoya

Of note during the opening: Vince plugs a house show in Madison Square Garden, which would wind up being the Curtain Call. Aldo tries his jobber offense to start as Bradshaw’s manager Uncle Zebekiah (Zeb Colter) gets on commentary to ask why Bradshaw isn’t getting a shot at Shawn Michaels. A good looking gutwrench powerbomb plants Aldo and it’s off to the bearhug. Aldo makes his quick comeback with a missile dropkick but the Clothesline puts Montoya away without too much effort.

Rating: D. Bradshaw of course had talent (why he’s not in the Hall of Fame isn’t clear) but the evil cowboy thing would have been old five years prior to this. There’s nothing wrong with getting your foot in the door though and the potential was there, which is more important than anything else.

We get a serious video from Vince, basically saying that the tour of Kuwait was this big show of freedom. During the trip, British Bulldog attacked Shawn Michaels on a beach and tried to drown him. Ok then.

Shawn Michaels vs. Hunter Hearst Helmsley

Non-title and I believe for the first time ever. If nothing else the first time on TV. An early armdrag lets HHH pose a bit and Shawn is already somewhat frustrated. We take a break and come back with Shawn tripping him down and walking over HHH’s back to get some of the heat back. HHH is down on the floor so Shawn takes a quick jog over to the announcers’ table to stare at Lawler and HHH’s latest valet.

A headlock brings HHH back in over the top (think Orton’s DDT) so the referee demands a clean break. Ever the good guy, Shawn lets HHH drop face first onto the mat in a funny bit. HHH ducks a charge and sends Shawn onto the top, setting up a punt out to the floor. Cue Mr. Perfect to watch as we take a second break.

Back again with HHH in control and hammering away in the corner with a fire he’s never shown to this point. We hit the chinlock as Lawler accidentally refers to Mr. Perfect as Hennig. A clothesline cuts off Shawn’s comeback bid and HHH unloads on him in the corner. We take a ridiculous third break and come back with Shawn in a pretty lazy looking chinlock.

The champ fights up with some right hands in the corner, followed by a catapult into the corner for a big crash. Shawn’s top rope elbow gets two so HHH actually tries a powerbomb, which is countered into a hurricanrana into a sunset flip for two on Michaels in a hot sequence. The Pedigree is countered and the superkick finishes clean.

Rating: B. Well of course these two are awesome together. Unfortunately this would be it for HHH’s time near the top of the card for a LONG time due to the Curtain Call this coming weekend. Shawn might not have been the biggest ratings draw in the world but sweet goodness he could wrestle a heck of a match.

British Bulldog isn’t worried about Shawn being on commentary for his match next week.

Overall Rating: C. The main event pretty easily bails this one out as Shawn did so often around this time. What brings it right back down again is the idea of watching British Bulldog vs. Shawn for the title on pay per view as it just sucks the energy and excitement out of me. The rest of the show was your usual 1996 mess but that main event was solid.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the History of the WWE’s Big Four Pay Per Views, now in PAPERBACK. Check out the information here:

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Summerslam 2002
Date: August 25, 2002
Location: Nassau Veterans Memorial, Uniondale, New York
Attendance: 14,797
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Tazz, Jim Ross

It’s very rare that a Summerslam is the biggest show of the year but that might be the case in 2002. Wrestlemania XVIII was in a much bigger venue and had a much bigger top match but as far as a whole card goes from top to bottom, this might have it beaten. The big matches here are Brock Lesnar challenging the Rock for the Undisputed Title and HHH vs. Shawn Michaels in a grudge match with Shawn making his first in-ring appearance since 1998. Let’s get to it.

Not much of an opening video other than the theme song over shots of the crowd.

Opening sequence.

Kurt Angle vs. Rey Mysterio

Rey showed Angle up recently and Kurt wants to prove that it’s just a fluke. Angle’s singlet looks like a barber pole and Rey sneaks in from behind with a springboard ankle scissors. The ankle lock goes on in less than thirty seconds but Rey sends him into the ropes with Kurt having to duck the 619.

A hard wheelbarrow suplex sends Rey hard onto the mat and one heck of a clothesline gives Angle two. Rey’s back is bent around the middle rope and Angle is getting a bit too cocky. A one legged Liontamer has Mysterio in even more trouble but a rollup gives him a fast two. Rey is certainly sticking around well enough so far.

That just ticks Angle off though and he throws Rey with a belly to belly. Kurt misses a charge though and goes sailing over the top but the referee won’t let Mysterio fly. That’s fine with Rey who flips OVER THE REFEREE to take Kurt down. The fans are losing their mind and Rey Dropping the Dime (springboard legdrop) for two makes them even worse. Now the 619 connects and the West Coast Pop is good for a VERY near fall. Rey puts him on top for a super hurricanrana but Angle slips out and grabs the ankle lock for the submission at 9:20.

Rating: A-. What a match. This is one of the best opening matches in company history as they just do not stop for the better part of ten minutes. It’s an outstanding performance with Rey getting his big breakout performance and Angle showing that he’s still one of the best in the world.

Stephanie McMahon brags about that match and tells a production guy to tell Eric Bischoff about it. She goes into her office and….there’s Eric, who seems to be sharing the office with her. I’m sure comedy and drama will ensue.

Ric Flair vs. Chris Jericho

Standard “you’re old and it’s my time so get out” feud with the required broken guitars to ruin a mid-show concert segment as well. This is actually Flair’s in-ring debut at Summerslam. Feeling out process to start and we hear about Jericho becoming the first ever Undisputed Champion. JR: “Not too many people can claim that.” Yeah Jim. I think it’s like, one or so.

Jericho misses an elbow drop and the chops start flying. They head outside with Jericho sending him into the barricade, followed by a middle rope dropkick for two back inside. Some suplexes stay on Flair’s back so you certainly can’t fault Jericho’s psychology. This time it’s Jericho taking too much time going up though and Flair slams him right back down.

The Walls are countered into a small package for two but Jericho goes extra evil by grabbing the Figure Four (I said evil, not original). In a creative save, Flair grabs the rope and then taps out, which means the hold is broken and the submission doesn’t count. The referee gets bumped and it’s a low blow into the Figure Four to make Jericho tap at 10:23.

Rating: C+. This was fine and while I’m not wild on having Flair go over Jericho, at least he lost in a good match to a dirty finish. If nothing else it could mean a whiny Jericho and that’s nothing but entertainment. Oh and Flair low blows are always worth checking out, just for how hard he hits those things.

Ad for a Hogan DVD.

Paul Heyman loves the idea of the Hogan DVD because it looks like they’re trying to squeeze out the final few dollars from his body after Lesnar destroyed him. Tonight, Lesnar destroys the Rock.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Edge

Apparently Eddie is mad that Edge fancies himself a sex symbol. I don’t really remember that being brought up on TV leading up to this match but maybe it was subtext. Eddie snaps the back of Edge’s neck across the top rope and takes over, only to get thrown across the ring.

Edge ties him up in the ropes and hits a spear but a second attempt misses to send the Canadian outside. That might mean a bad shoulder so Eddie sends him into the steps. Back to back DDT’s on the arm including one from the top get two on Edge and we hit a Kimura of all things.

It’s off to a crossface chickenwing and then a top wristlock which is a very good idea. I get so bored watching matches where we get the same hold over and over. There are so many holds that can be used on the same body part so mixing it up like this helps so much. Edge fights back with a one armed slam and a faceplant to send Eddie outside.

It doesn’t take two good arms to dive out to the floor so Edge takes Eddie out all over again. Back in and a super sitout gordbuster gives Edge two more, followed by the Edgecution for the same. Eddie goes right back to the shoulder but walks into the spear (more on that in a second) at 11:47.

Rating: B-. This was going to be much higher until that completely ridiculous ending. Eddie spent eleven minutes working on the arm and then Edge just uses the shoulder for the spear to end the match with nothing more than a flinch? There’s no excuse for that and Edge should know better.

The Un-Americans are ready to give the greedy Americans more. More of the Un-Americans that is.

Tag Team Titles: Goldust/Booker T. vs. Un-Americans

Lance Storm and Christian are defending. Goldust cleans house to start before it’s off to Booker, who JR describes as being “as Americana as Americana can be.” The Canadians are still reeling so Storm throws Goldust over the corner to take over, setting up some of those weird hopping stomps.

Christian gets two on a backbreaker, which JR says works on the back. Something like a Boss Man Slam gets Goldust out of trouble but Christian grabs a front facelock. As you might expect, that means a missed tag so Goldust has to catapult the champions into each other.

That’s STILL not enough for the tag though as the champs knock Booker off the apron, only to miss a Conchairto. The USA chant starts up and there’s the hot tag to Booker who scores with a missile dropkick on Christian. Storm hits the referee by mistake and both champions take the same ax kick. Cue Test to kick Booker’s head off, giving Christian the pin at 9:35.

Rating: C. The match was fine but the ending brought it down a good bit with the standard WWE style finish hurting things a lot. At least we had a good match to get there and the Un-Americans are still fine for heel champions. The Test stuff gets annoying but you had to know it was coming as soon as the ref went down.

There’s a Make Out with Nidia Contest at the World. We’re moving on before that sinks in.

Stephanie and Bischoff debate women’s place in wrestling. McMahon: “It’s like mine: ON TOP!” This turns into a discussion of the Intercontinental Title match and GOOD GRIEF Stephanie’s acting is somehow worse here.

Intercontinental Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Chris Benoit

This is Raw vs. Smackdown and Benoit is defending. A kick to the leg sends Benoit outside but he comes back in and easily takes Van Dam down until Rob starts spinning around to escape. The release German suplex drops him again though and Benoit starts in on the neck to set up for the Crossface later on.

A Dynamite Kid snap suplex gets two on Van Dam but he avoids the Swan Dive. Chris does the same to the Five Star though and it’s time for the Crossface. The long legs get Van Dam over to the ropes so Benoit shoves him off the top and down onto the barricade for a crash. Benoit cranks on the arms for a bit and slams him head first into the mat to keep Van Dam in trouble.

It’s right back to the Crossface with Van Dam quickly breaking free, only to be sent shoulder first into the post. Some suplexes onto the arm make me realize that Eddie probably should have worked something other than the arm if Benoit, whose finisher is an arm hold, was going to do this.

Another Crossface is about to be broken so Benoit switches into a dragon sleeper of all things. That’s escaped as well and Van Dam’s hair is down in a very rare sight. Rolling Thunder gets two on Benoit but he’s able to crotch Rob on top. You don’t try a belly to back superplex on a high flier though as Rob crossbodies his way out, setting up the Five Star for the pin and the title at 16:22.

Rating: B. Sometimes you just need to have two talented guys go out there and have a match. The shoulder didn’t quite play into the finish but at least Van Dam’s finisher isn’t done with his arm. I liked this more than I was expecting to and that’s always a positive, especially on a show this stacked.

Bischoff gloats so Stephanie laughs at him. WELL OF COURSE SHE DOES! How dare we suggest that Stephanie not have some kind of ace up her sleeve? That’s why people get tired of Stephanie: she almost NEVER has to give up anything and it gets old in a hurry. I’m sure she’s stolen some other talent and Bischoff will be crushed while Stephanie gets to dance around and talk about how great Smackdown and its fans really are.

Video on the Un-Americans to set up Test vs. Undertaker.

Undertaker vs. Test

JR says Undertaker has a big home field advantage. I get what he’s going for but we’re MUCH closer to Canada and Toronto in general than we are to Houston. But then again, never underestimate how hard an American announcer is going to push his countryman in a feud like this. Undertaker starts with a hiptoss of all things but a knee to the ribs cuts off some driving shoulders.

Test shoves the referee into the ropes to break up Old School and since this isn’t Raw, that’s not a DQ. After a quick trip to the floor, Test very slowly hammers away in the corner and drops a knee on the ribs. It’s off to an armbar of all things until Undertaker fights up and suplexes his way to freedom. AMERICAN freedom that is.

The pumphandle slam doesn’t work so Undertaker plants him with a chokeslam for a delayed two. Cue Storm and Christian for a distraction so Test can get in the big boot for two of his own. Test grabs a chair and shoves the referee down, allowing Undertaker to kick the chair straight back into his face. The Tombstone ends Test at 8:20.

Rating: D. This was fine for a long Raw match but on a show with this much talent around, it’s only going to go so far. Undertaker winning is fine enough as it’s really hard to buy Test beating someone who was in the main event of last month’s pay per view going toe to toe to toe with Rock and Kurt Angle.

Undertaker goes into the crowd and grabs an American flag for some posing.

We get a long and very good recap of HHH vs. Shawn Michaels. They used to be friends and Shawn came back as part of the NWO. After the team was disbanded, Shawn came back again and was made into HHH’s manager. That wasn’t cool with Shawn and his Texas pride so HHH beat him up twice in a row, including putting Shawn through a car window. Shawn is willing to have one more fight (not match, but fight) here tonight.

HHH vs. Shawn Michaels

Anything goes and unsanctioned with Shawn in jeans. Shawn hammers away to start and spears HHH down for more right hands. They’re quickly on the floor with Shawn ramming him head first into the post. It’s time for some toys, including a trashcan to HHH’s head and a top rope right hand for the same.

Sweet Chin Music misses less than three minutes in and Shawn walks into a spinebuster for the first real shot to his bad back. Like a smart villain, HHH starts in on the back but Shawn says bring it, earning himself a kick to the chest. One heck of a chair shot to the back has Shawn’s face in agony, which is where so much of this match’s strength comes from. Michaels could tell such a story with his face and it really does bring you deeper into the story they’re trying to tell.

Shawn gets in a desperation rollup for two but walks into the facebuster to cut him off again. A DDT on the chair gets two and we’ve got some blood. HHH steals Shawn’s belt for a good old fashioned whipping followed by a few buckle shots to the cut head. With Shawn pulling himself to his feet, it’s sledgehammer time. As is his custom though, Shawn cuts HHH off at the exactly right time, earning himself an abdominal stretch.

HHH goes for the hammer again but Earl Hebner calls him off and yells a lot. A superplex is broken up so HHH blasts him in the back with the chair again. There’s a side slam through an open chair and Shawn looks dead. You can feel the fans getting more and more into this and JR wants the referee to do a fast count. Shawn kicks out and now HHH is getting frustrated because Michaels won’t stay down.

Another side slam onto a closed chair gets the same and HHH covers three times in a row. The Pedigree is broken up by a low blow and you can feel the crowd coming back to life. HHH grabs the chair but a desperation superkick knocks it into HHH’s face to draw blood as well. Shawn hits the forearm into the nipup and the fans actually come to their feet as it’s the old Shawn one more time. A great chair shot to the head drops HHH and Shawn picks up the belt to even things up a bit from earlier.

Shawn bulldogs the very bloody HHH onto the steps to knock him even sillier. Since that’s not enough, let’s bring in a ladder too. Said ladder is thrown inside but HHH baseball slides it into Shawn’s ribs for a breather. HHH goes up top for some reason and it’s a superplex to bring him back down for two. Now the steps are brought in but Shawn drop toeholds HHH into them before knocking him outside again.

With nothing else left, here’s a table too with Shawn splashing HHH off the top through the wood. HHH very slowly rolls back in and Shawn brings the ladder inside again. The big elbow off the ladder crushes HHH and Shawn pops right back up. It’s superkick time but HHH counters into the Pedigree which is countered into a jackknife rollup for the pin at 27:19.

Rating: A+. My goodness what a performance. That’s the only way to put it as Shawn basically started all over again and had this kind of an amazing match. This was some outstanding storytelling with Michaels taking us to the very brink but fighting back until there was an actual way to believe he could pull it off. HHH was at his most dastardly here and that makes for one heck of a match. This is one of the best matches of both of their careers and the circumstances make it even more amazing. Shawn timed that comeback as well as anything I’ve ever seen and I got swept up in the match all over again. Just excellent.

Post match, HHH hits a celebrating Shawn in the back with a sledgehammer to go biggest heel ever. Shawn does a stretcher job, seemingly putting him out of action for a long time. Oh and one more thing: for some reason HHH has tried to claim that this match was forty five minutes long. Even if you count the entrances and the post match stuff, it’s less than thirty six minutes total. That’s a big stretch even in wrestling, which is covering a lot of ground.

Here’s Howard Finkel of all people to talk about how he hasn’t been here since Wrestlemania II but you’ll always have him because of loyalty. Cue Trish Stratus (who has been feuding with a sexist Finkel) but the Fink doesn’t want to hear from someone who thinks she’s hot stuff because of her looks. Trish hits on him and Finkel makes sex jokes until Lillian Garcia (who is having the real issues with him) to slap Howard in the face and kick him low. This was just a way to calm things down after the previous match but it was still stupid.

We recap Brock Lesnar vs. The Rock. Lesnar won the King of the Ring tournament to earn this show and Rock won the title at Vengeance. Brock has run through the company but this is by far his biggest test to date.

Undisputed Title: Brock Lesnar vs. The Rock

Lesnar is challenging and has Paul Heyman in his corner. The fans are ALL OVER Rock as he charges right into a belly to belly, further banging up his already injured ribs. Some backbreakers have the fans cheering for Rock though and Brock takes him outside for a beating in the crowd.

Back in and another belly to belly sends Rock flying for two. Heyman even gets in a little choking as Rock’s right hands are cut off by a powerslam. Brock charges into the post and three straight clotheslines finally put him down for two. It’s off to a bad Sharpshooter with Rock nowhere near sitting on Brock’s back.

Heyman finally gets on the apron for a distraction but Lesnar saves his agent from a Rock Bottom. The distraction lets a chair go into Rock’s ribs, setting up a bearhug into a waistlock on the mat. This stays on WAY too long but to be fair, Lesnar isn’t really capable of having a long match on his own just yet.

Rock punches his way out but takes one heck of a running shoulder to the ribs in the corner. Lesnar gets punched (you might notice a pattern emerging here) outside again and it’s announcers’ table time. Instead though Brock gets catapulted into the table and Heyman takes a very slow motion Rock Bottom through the table.

Back in and the Rock Bottom only gets two but Lesnar grabs one of his own (JR: “Brock Bottom?”) for another near fall. The spinebuster looks to set up the People’s Elbow but Brock jumps up for a BIG clothesline. Brock can’t hit the F5 but reverses the Rock Bottom into the F5 for the pin and the title at 16:02.

Rating: B. It’s not a classic but the key thing here is that Brock reversed Rock’s finisher into his own for the completely clean pin. Heyman hadn’t been a factor for about five minutes so the pinfall is WAY more important. Lesnar won because he was better here (ignoring the rib injuries but that was hardly cheating). This was a good match but it’s important and well done which is all that matters.

Overall Rating: A. This is one of the best pay per views the company has ever put on and pretty easily the best Summerslam ever. The worst match of the night was Undertaker vs. Test and even that was watchable. Throw in a masterpiece like HHH vs. Michaels and this is an instant classic, which isn’t often the case at Summerslam.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQKDV5O

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Ratings Comparison

Kurt Angle vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A-

2017 Redo: A-

Chris Jericho vs. Ric Flair

Original: B

2013 Redo: C

2017 Redo: C+

Eddie Guerrero vs. Edge

Original: C+

2013 Redo: B-

2017 Redo: B-

Un-Americans vs. Booker T/Goldust

Original: C-

2013 Redo: D+

2017 Redo: C

Rob Van Dam vs. Chris Benoit

Original: B

2013 Redo: B

2017 Redo: B

Undertaker vs. Test

Original: D

2013 Redo: D

2017 Redo: D

Shawn Michaels vs. HHH

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A+

2017 Redo: A+

The Rock vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: C+

2013 Redo: B-

2017 Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A+

2017 Redo: A

Still a masterpiece.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/05/history-of-summerslam-count-up-summerslam-2002-best-summerslam-ever/

And the 2013 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/08/07/summerslam-count-up-2002-the-performance-of-a-lifetime/

Monday Night Raw
Date: August 5, 2002
Location: Baltimore Arena, Baltimore, Maryland
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Summerslam continues to approach and that means we’re in need of some major matches. The big story around here though is someone attacking Shawn Michaels, sending HHH right back into caring about his former best friend who he just happens to beat up every now and then. Let’s get to it.

The opening recap looks at Shawn Michaels being attacked and everyone being a suspect, set to Rey Mysterio’s old WCW music for some reason.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Chris Jericho to get things going. This is his show now and only a certified genius like Eric Bischoff would bring him to Raw. After calling the fans losers (you’re better than that Chris), he says Bischoff gets the difference in talent between Jericho and Ric Flair. JR: “I just totally disagree with that.” HHH cuts him off because we haven’t seen these two fight enough this year. HHH suggests that Jericho had something to do with Shawn’s attack as a way to get back at HHH for the loss at Wrestlemania. That…..really doesn’t make sense but neither does most of what HHH says.

Jericho says it wasn’t him and brings up the problem with HHH’s theory: he just beat up Shawn a few weeks ago and now it would hurt HHH to have someone else attack Michaels? Jericho accuses HHH of being the attacker but HHH says he was in the ring when it happened. That’s not exactly beyond a reasonable doubt but I’ll take what I can get.

Anyway, HHH is going to find out who did it because he Pedigreed Shawn for his own good. HHH leaves and is quickly replaced by Rob Van Dam, whose chants annoy Jericho all over again. Rob is here for the official welcome to Raw and to ask Jericho what he’s been smoking. A match is set up due to Jericho getting annoyed at the RVD chants.

Big Show vs. Bubba Ray Dudley

Tables match. Show has slightly altered gear this week as the one piece swimsuit look now ends in shorts. So he’s wearing a woman’s one piece swimsuit but is self-conscious about his thighs. Bubba slugs away to start but gets caught in a good looking belly to belly. Some shots on the floor stagger Show for a few seconds until Show beats him down again. There’s a side slam to Bubba and it’s already time for a table.

Show kicks the table in half by mistake so Bubba folds it up and hits him in the head. That goes nowhere so here’s Trish to distract Show (the leather skirt helps with that), allowing Spike to come in and hit the big man with a football helmet. Show staggers into a flapjack through the table to give Bubba the win.

Rating: D-. As you might expect, Trish’s outfit was the only good thing about this one. I have no idea why Show is jobbing to Bubba Ray Dudley and a football helmet but I’m sure it’s going to result in Bubba getting a push because THAT’S what the world is waiting for. There’s something to be said for trying something new but there’s no real logic behind picking someone whose push is guaranteed to be a failure.

The Un-Americans run down America and the Undertaker. This involves talking about slaughtering innocent people in response to 9/11 and yeah, that’s too far. Like, way too far. Sgt. Slaughter comes in and offers to show them some real American aggression. This is going to be a very, very long night.

We look back at Moolah and Mae Young getting beaten down last week.

Hardcore Title: Tommy Dreamer vs. Bradshaw

Dreamer is defending and this seems to take JR by surprise as he says this was coming later in the show. They actually start fighting in the back, which is an interesting idea for the division for a change. Therefore, they’re almost immediately in the arena to make sure this is your run of the mill hardcore match. JR calls this a Raw exclusive and I wouldn’t brag about that.

Bradshaw beats him around the arena for a few near falls until Dreamer pulls him into the post. After some more weapons shots, Dreamer gets tossed with a middle rope fall away slam. A powerbomb gets two for Bradshaw and Dreamer gets the same off a shot to the head. Dreamer DDTs him on the floor for the pin and the title.

Rating: F. Nothing interesting and nothing new here, save for JR bragging about the division. It says a lot about the show when the announcers don’t seem to know what’s going on with the format. The division is so far beyond a waste of time at this point and I have no idea why so many of these people are still employed.

William Regal and Christopher Nowinski are talking about their tag match later when they run into Molly Holly and her new friend Victoria. Nowinski likes the idea of de-virginizing Molly and has to read the back of Victoria’s trunks to remember her name. Funny, but still rather disturbing.

Goldust complains to Booker T. about Mike Myers stealing his idea for Goldmember. As retaliation, Goldust introduces Minidust, who promptly enjoys Booker’s leg. Thankfully HHH (What am I saying?) comes in and accuses Booker of attacking Shawn. Booker isn’t happy.

Howard Finkel asks Bischoff if he can challenge Lillian Garcia to be the official ring announcer. Bischoff actually agrees because WE’RE HAVING A STORY ABOUT BATTLING RING ANNOUNCERS! Were the referees busy this week? Fink has a letter to deliver to Bischoff and it turns out to be from Stephanie, listing off various talents appearing on this week’s show. If nothing else we get to hear Fink do his big introductions voice which I’ll never get tired of hearing.

Kane is coming back. Oh yeah. He’s been gone.

Test vs. Sgt. Slaughter

Test kicks him in the face before the bell and there’s no match. Seriously that’s the whole thing.

Booker T./Goldust vs. William Regal/Christopher Nowinski

Goldust punches Nowinski in the face to start and follows up with a running hip attack because that’s how Goldust’s offense works. The bad guys start working on Goldust’s arm to take over as the fans tells Chris that Harvard sucks. Lawler starts talking about Molly wanting to sleep with Nowinski and those old awkward feelings start up again. Regal is finally sent into the corner for the hot tag off to Booker so house can be cleaned. Everything breaks down with both teams getting near falls off secondary finishers. An atomic drop into the ax kick puts Regal away.

Rating: C. This was your standard tag team formula match, making it by far and away the best thing on the show thus far. Booker and Goldust are a legitimately entertaining tag team and therefore they’re stuck spinning their wheels while HHH accuses Booker of attacking Shawn for his weekly table scraps.

HHH accuses the Un-Americans of attacking Shawn and hits a table with the hammer.

Trish Stratus vs. Victoria

Molly is on commentary and oh my this is going to get rough in a hurry. Twenty seconds into the match, Lawler flat out asks Molly if she’s a virgin. Lawler: “Do you have a fondness for cherries?” The match starts slowly and Victoria hurts her knee as the cherry jokes continue. Naturally it’s a ruse so Victoria can kick Trish in the face, which greatly pleases Molly. JR says it makes her sound “multi-orgasmic”. Trish chops away and now let’s talk about how far Spike got with Molly. A sunset flip is reversed and Victoria grabs the ropes for the pin.

Rating: F. This has nothing to do with the match. Lawler was as disturbing as I’ve ever heard him here and JR didn’t even do much to stop him. There’s no excuse for this story to exist and it’s absolutely disgusting. I know Katie Vick is still coming up this year but this might be even worse as it’s about a real person and is supposed to be from a face.

Show is annoyed at HHH accusing him too.

Tag Team Titles: Hardy Boys vs. Un-Americans

Storm and Christian are defending. Matt and Christian slug it out to start before it’s off to Jeff for the high pitch pop. The heels take over with some double teaming but Jeff scores with the Whisper in the Wind. The hot tag brings in Matt for the Twist of Fate but Christian gets in a cheap shot to give Storm two. Jeff dives off the barricade to take Christian down again and the Swanton connects, only to have Christian pull the referee out for the DQ.

Rating: D. Another horribly uninteresting match here with the Hardys not exactly putting in a ton of effort. The Un-Americans are fine for a basic heel team and they can wrestle a good enough match but you need more than four minutes against an unmotivated team. Nothing to see here but at least Jeff is getting a response.

Test goes after the Hardys until Undertaker makes the save. The Un-Americans bail so Undertaker steals a police motorcycle and gives chase.

Here’s Bischoff to deal with the Howard and Lillian issue, which the fans didn’t seem to know existed. First of all though, Eric promises a surprise for HHH later on. I’m so thrilled. Anyway, the announcers take turns plugging the new movie XXX and of course we see a trailer. Finkel implies that Lillian enjoys servicing multiple sailors and this time he’s the heel, unlike ANYONE who makes fun of Molly for being a virgin. Bischoff sends out 3 Minute Warning to destroy Lillian because this is supposed to be entertaining.

Chris Jericho vs. Rob Van Dam

Jericho starts fast and hammers away in the corner but gets monkey flipped for two. Seriously who goes for a cover after a monkey flip? A slingshot flip dive puts Jericho down again until he grabs a release German suplex to really take over. Jericho goes for the turnbuckle pad but settles for a spinning kick to the face instead. The Lionsault hits knees and Van Dam’s Rolling Thunder is good for two. Rob reverses the Walls attempt into a small package for two and there’s the ref bump. Chris chairs him down but Flair comes in with a chair to Jericho’s head, setting up the Five Star for the pin.

Rating: B-. Match of the night by far here and that’s something that this show was dying for at this point. Flair vs. Jericho should be a lot of fun and Van Dam can do….something for Summerslam. The match was pretty good but this show is just so far beyond saving that it doesn’t matter at this point.

Bischoff is on his way to the ring with a surprise for HHH. This is perhaps the most unnecessary scene I can remember in wrestling this year.

Here’s Bischoff to introduce HHH for his big surprise. The surprise is a live feed from San Antonio so HHH can talk to Shawn. They’re cool at the moment and it seems that the Pedigree is forgotten. We get to hear them make up on air until HHH finally gets to the point by asking if Shawn remembers anything.

That’s a big negative so HHH promises to find out who did it. We have a break in the case though: the Greensboro police have sent Shawn some security footage, which he hasn’t actually watched yet. We see the video, it’s really blurry, Shawn enhances it, and it’s HHH. I mean, you could see that before it was enhanced but let’s stretch this out even longer. HHH admits it (well he kind of had to) and apparently his motive was to show that Shawn needed HHH’s protection. From HHH you mean?

Anyway the doctors have told Shawn that he’ll make a 100% recovery. Say by….Summerslam? HHH: “What are you going to do? Talk me to death?” Shawn wants to fight at Summerslam, even though HHH asks what happens if Shawn can’t take care of his family anymore. Michaels doesn’t really care and the fight is set for Summerslam to end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. This is a rather interesting case where I remember the ending very differently. At the time, I LOVED the idea of Shawn coming back to face HHH in a fight at Summerslam but that’s all I remember about about the segment and really the show in general. While the announcement was a good idea and came off well, almost EVERYTHING else was a mess and really kept everything from having a chance.

Before we get to the rest of this mess, let’s look at the big angle. Now keep in mind that HHH knew the whole idea throughout the show. I get the idea of wanting to put up a front but what in the world was the point of doing that if you’re going to do the big reveal just a week later? Set this up, wait a few weeks and THEN do the HHH reveal. Either that or just cut out the whole Pedigree thing from a few weeks ago. What’s the point of having HHH run around for a week and waste our time? Did he really think he was going to get away with it? I know he has delusions of grandeur but this was a stretch even for him.

That leaves us with the rest of the show, which included a battle of the ring announcers, a horrible table match, an even worse hardcore match, Minidust and finally, an absolutely unnecessary and deplorable batch of commentary during the Trish vs. Victoria match. There’s a difference between bad wrestling and a ridiculous waste of time with this one being far more of the latter than the former.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQKDV5O

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: July 29, 2002
Location: Greensboro Coliseum, Greensboro, North Carolina
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re officially in the HHH Era on Raw but unfortunately he doesn’t really have a lot to do yet. Last week HHH debuted on the show and turned heel by beating up Shawn Michaels, but there’s absolutely no way that’s going to lead to a match anytime soon of course. With about a month left before Summerslam, the card is in need of some matches in a hurry. Let’s get to it.

The opening recap looks at Shawn and HHH from last week, which is almost the only thing worth talking about. At least it wasn’t Stephanie vs. Eric again.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Bischoff to get things going and he’s already talking about Stephanie. She stole Lesnar last week and this week he’s got a knockout of his own. Here are the newest members of the Raw roster: Christian, Lance Storm and Test, the Un-Americans. So….what about that whole building up tag teams over on Smackdown? Total waste of time for the sake of Stephanie vs. Bischoff? Good to know.

Storm points to the upside flag Test is carrying, which stands for America being in distress. Let’s look at some of those American icons, such as Elvis Presley, a fat drug addict who died on the toilet. We hear similar complaints about Marilyn Monroe, Babe Ruth and John Wayne (JR: “NOW WAIT A MINUTE!”). The champs don’t think much of America, save for Bischoff of course.

A fired up Shawn Michaels of all people cuts them off and says he wants to exercise his rights as an American citizen to beat HHH from one side of this arena to the other. Shawn doesn’t want to hear from some Canucks who are still mad that he beat up Bret Hart. If Bischoff doesn’t bring HHH to him, he’ll go find HHH himself. Storm says Shawn will get what’s coming to him. Did Shawn really need to come out here at this point? It’s not like these segments couldn’t be split up.

Bischoff is talking to Eddie Guerrero when a messenger comes up and says a woman in a limo has sent for him. Eric isn’t interested and says she can wait. I’m thinking…..Linda?

Booker T. vs. Eddie Guerrero

Booker starts fast with a flapjack for an early near fall as Lawler wants to know what happened to Booker’s bad back. Fair question actually. Eddie remembers it as well and forearms Booker in the back to take over. A one armed camel clutch keeps Booker in trouble and it’s time for some Spanish trash talk.

Eddie unhooks the turnbuckle pad and it’s time for the comeback, including a clothesline for two. As expected, Booker sends Eddie pretty close to the buckle (it wasn’t clear if he knew about the pad being gone) and hits an ax kick to the side of the head (Eddie wasn’t bent over) for the pin.

Rating: C. The ending was a bit off but the match got a little more time than usual and let Booker get a win instead of losing all over again. There’s quite the midcard being built around here and they actually have a title to fight over. If one of them could, I don’t know, head towards the main event, things might get interesting for a change.

Moolah and Mae Young are in the limo.

Shawn goes HHH hunting but finds Booker and Goldust instead. Booker isn’t cool with Shawn throwing him out of the NWO but Shawn says it was business. That sounds like an invitation to a fight and Goldust can dig that. Sucka.

Trish Stratus/Bubba Ray Dudley vs. William Regal/Molly Holly

Rematch from last week but Regal is injured, meaning we have a replacement.

Trish Stratus/Bubba Ray Dudley vs. Big Show/Molly Holly

Lawler slips up and implies that Molly is good looking before remembering to be a face and pretend she’s overweight. Molly takes Trish down to start but Big Show misses an elbow, meaning we get the Show vs. Bubba match that we were all waiting for. Bubba’s bad arm gives him away though and it’s Show taking over without too much trouble.

The women come in again with Trish getting two off the Chick Kick, allowing JR to mention that Molly doesn’t spend too much time on her back. Molly tries to go after Bubba, earning her a quick dance. Show saves What’s Up but takes some steps to the head, leaving Molly to get caught in a Doomsday Device for the pin.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here, aside from some bad jokes at Molly’s expense. I’m still not sure where we’re going with Trish/Bubba but they’ve managed to come up with worse ideas before. I’m also looking forward o getting away from Trish vs. Molly because even Lawler is having issues remembering his stupid motivations here.

Show cleans house and sets up a table but Trish saves Bubba with some distracting chair shots.

Post break, Show yells at Shawn and mild threats are issued.

Ric Flair gives Jeff Hardy a pep talk when Bischoff comes in. Flair doesn’t think Jeff should risk his life for ratings every week, including in a hardcore match tonight with Bradshaw. On top of that, Ric has an announcement for later tonight. Moolah and Mae Young come in for a book plug and generally unfunny shenanigans. Bischoff will let them plug the book in the ring.

Hardcore Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Bradshaw

Jeff is challenging and now billed from just North Carolina for the cheap pop. Bradshaw knocks him around to start and gets two off a very hardcore elbow drop. A trashcan shot to the back looks to set up a powerbomb off the steps but Jeff backdrops his way out instead. It’s ladder time because that’s all Jeff knows how to do anymore. The ref gets bumped to keep this going and Bradshaw is knocked off the ladder. A Swanton in Bradshaw’s general area gives Jeff the pin and the title.

Rating: D. I hit you, you hit me, the finish sucks and does nothing for anyone. Hardy wins another meaningless title to go with his recent European Title win, meaning he’s likely losing this one by the end of the month at the latest. If nothing else I hope he does so we don’t have to see Jeff’s personalized title with his “artwork” included.

Johnny the Bull and Tommy Dreamer win the title.

Regal was faking his injury and goes off to get a massage. Benoit comes out of the green room and says he doesn’t need luck.

Intercontinental Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Chris Benoit

Benoit is challenging. A fight over a wristlock goes nowhere as the announcers talk about Flair having a big announcement for later tonight. Benoit gets tired of the posing and kicks Van Dam in the ribs as the conversation moves on to a Shawn/HHH discussion. Rob kicks him in the face to set up a big dive over the top to really wake the crowd up.

Back in and Rob does his splits to set up a monkey flip, only to have Benoit score with a basement dropkick to the head. Van Dam goes shoulder first into the post as it’s time to set up for the Crossface. Benoit cranks on the arm and cuts off the champ’s comeback by sending him hard back to the mat.

The stepover kick to the face drops Benoit though and Rolling Thunder is good for two. Rob misses the Five Star and that means it’s time for the Crossface. A rope is reached but Benoit grabs the hold all over again. Van Dam rolls away but Benoit throws his feet on the ropes for the pin and the title.

Rating: B. Good stuff here and it’s a positive sign to have Benoit already with a title again so soon after his return. Van Dam will be back and you can almost guarantee a rematch from here. The wrestling was solid too with the story making sense all the way through. The arm work even played into the ending with Benoit going from the Crossface to the pin.

Shawn tells the door attendant to let HHH know that he’s waiting in the parking lot. Big Show is watching.

Moolah and Mae Young are in the ring with Bischoff saying they have three minutes. Bischoff actually dozes off as Moolah talks about some stories. Mae almost gets in a fight with Moolah….and here comes 3 Minute Warning. The women take a beating and NO ONE COMES OUT TO HELP THEM. Bischoff names the monsters as Jamal and Rosey.

After a break, with Mae being carted out, Bischoff says that when he snaps his fingers, things happen. Cue Undertaker to say this finger snapping thing could be interesting. Christopher Nowinski interrupts and makes the mistake of insulting the Undertaker. Let’s have a match.

Undertaker vs. Christopher Nowinski

Chris tries to talk his way out of this but gets sent into the corner. Undertaker charges into an elbow in the corner and Chris Harvard (JR’s name) hammers away, only to get caught with Old School. The Last Ride wraps it up quick.

Post match the Un-Americans come out for the beatdown, including a mostly messed up Conchairto. It’s so bad that they have to try a second time and still only barely graze him. How hard can it be to hit someone in the head?

After a break, the Un-Americans say they have one more piece of business.

Rock implies Coach slept with a cow and Coach makes the mistake of going down the rabbit hole. This prompts Rock to go into the full story, capped off sound effects and saying Coach likes to stick microphones up cows’ rectums. Coach: “Rock it was just one night.” Rock: “WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA! THE ROCK WAS KIDDING! Hey is that a cow over there?” Coach: “Where???”

Anyway, Rock is ready to give Brock Lesnar the beating he deserves but first, he’s facing Ric Flair in Flair Country. Rock talks about how big it’s going to be, says IF YA SMELL, waits for JR to talk about the match, struts on and off screen, and then says IS COOKIN. This was great in the way that only Rock can make something great.

Here’s HHH to address Shawn. It was HHH’s idea to have Shawn as his manager so they could take over the WWE together. Shawn doesn’t understand that his time is over and it’s not about him anymore. All the injuries have caught up with him and last Monday was a slap of reality in Shawn’s face. Shawn’s career is over and he needs to just accept it and be HHH’s manager. A producer gets up on the apron and tells HHH something, which sends him running to the back.

We come back from a break with wrestlers around an unconscious and bloody Shawn. HHH demands help for his buddy and Shawn is taken away in an ambulance. Bischoff suggests that HHH was behind it and we get a censored F Bomb.

Ric Flair vs. The Rock

Non-title and Rock requested the match. They trade armdrags to start with Flair actually sending the champ out to the floor. Back in and Rock sends him into the corner before copying the strut, earning himself some Flair chops. Rock is put on the floor again as this is almost one sided so far.

It’s WAY too early for the Figure Four though and Rock is soundly booed by the North Carolina crowd. The spinebuster looks to set up the People’s Elbow but Flair grabs the leg, only to have the Figure Four countered into the Sharpshooter. A poke to the eye cuts Rock off and NOW the Figure Four goes on in the middle of the ring. Rock is in the ropes quickly enough and the Rock Bottom puts Flair away.

Rating: C-. Perfectly fine match here with Rock letting Flair get to show off in his home state. It’s not like anyone is expecting anything great out of Flair at this point and he certainly didn’t look bad. This was all it needed to be and the fans were into it, though it’s pretty clearly just there to set up whatever Flair’s announcement is going to be.

We get the handshake and the hand raise so Rock can leave Flair to make his announcement. Flair can barely get a word out though before Chris Jericho of all people comes out. A chair shot to the head drops Flair as I’m wondering how Rock didn’t hear Jericho’s very loud music setting this up. Jericho says Raw is Jericho to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. It’s amazing what some structure and goals can do for a show. Well that and having a far better built midcard with some matches and acts actually getting some time. It’s far from perfect and there’s still a lot of work that needs to be done, but this is so much better than the disaster that Raw used to be that it’s kind of amazing. Totally watchable show this week, which I couldn’t imagine saying just two months ago.

 

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There are a lot of these.In no particular order but each should have a caption.