WWF House Show
Date: September 22, 1984
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 19,000
Commentators: Gene Okerlund, Gorilla Monsoon

It’s another MSG house show from 1984, meaning Hulkamania is here but not to the level it would ultimately reach. The champ is in the house tonight and defending the title against one of his biggest rivals of the time: Big John Studd. Other than that there isn’t much to see here, but that’s how a lot of house shows were back in the day. Let’s get to it.

Gene and Gorilla welcome us to the show.

Salvatore Bellomo vs. Brutus Beefcake

This is Beefcake’s MSG debut and he’s actually billed from Parts Unknown. We’re also told that Jesse Ventura is in the hospital in San Diego, meaning he won’t be here to face Hogan. Big John Studd will be challenging Hogan instead. After a brief stall to get us going, Beefcake shoves him down and then into the corner for good measure. Bellomo gets nowhere on a headlock so he dropkicks Beefcake down and hooks an armdrag as well.

Beefcake walks around a bit as more stalling ensues. Back to the headlock as we hit the mat early on. Gene wants to know if Beefcake’s mother knows she has a son named Brutus Beefcake. You mean there isn’t a Mama Beefcake? Bellomo speeds things up with a leapfrog and a reverse dropkick to stagger Brutus a bit. Beefcake snaps off a headbutt to send Salvatore down and the slow offense continues. To be fair though this was far more common in 1984.

Off to a neck crank as Gorilla isn’t thrilled with the refereeing job so far. A back body drop puts Sal down again and the ropes look very loose out there. Brutus goes after the back with a slam and some headbutts to the back for two. Some knees to the jaw get two for Brutus as Gorilla is complaining about what looks like metal on Beefcake’s arms. Bellomo fights up with some solid right hands and a dropkick to send Brutus to the floor. Back in and Brutus pounds away very slowly by knocking Bellomo into the corner. A cross body is caught in mid air into a powerslam by Beefcake for the pin.

Rating: D+. I’ve seen WAY worse debuts for people but it didn’t do much for me here. Brutus didn’t look lost but he looked very limited with what he could do out there. You can only watch so many forearms to the back and knee chokes before you get bored you know? Not terrible here but cutting out three or four minutes would have helped a lot.

Chief Jay Strongbow vs. Nikolai Volkoff

Nikolai sings before the match and Jay seems ok with it. The referee tells them the rules which you never see anymore as I guess it’s a waste of time now. I would however pay a good deal of money for an official WWE rule book given how much it changes at times. Strongbow pounds away in the corner to start and we have a standoff. Off to an armbar by Jay and into a hammerlock before he fires off some basic strikes to the ample gut of Volkoff.

Nikolai shoves him into the corner and puts on a nerve hold, as apparently they need a breather after three and a half minutes of “action”. Jay tries to get on the warpath, only to be pulled right back down by the hair. The referee catches it and Gene actually applauds him for getting one right. Back to the nerve hold for a bit longer before Strongbow gets up and goes on the warpath with some knee lifts. The path continues until as Nikolai pounds on the back until it’s off to Strongbow’s sleeper. Volkoff rams him back first into the buckle to escape and drops an elbow for the pin.

Rating: D-. This match wasn’t even seven minutes long and nearly two minutes of it was spent in a nerve hold. Strongbow was long past the point of being worth much here other than a nostalgia pop, which makes for some very dull matches. This wasn’t much to see and Volkoff never would get much better in the ring.

SD Jones vs. Dave Schultz

Schultz is a pretty decent heel who would have his career cut short by being an idiot and attacking a news reporter asking him if wrestling was fake. He backs away from Jones in the corner before taking it to the mat with a headlock. Jones puts on a body vice but gets punched in the face and choked for his efforts. They get back up and Schultz slaps Jones in the face like the villain he is.

Back to the mat with Jones taking over via a headscissors until Schultz makes the ropes. Now Jones slaps Schultz and pounds away, only to have Dave kick him in the face to take over. A clothesline gets two for Schultz and it’s off to a chinlock on SD. Jones fights up and gets two off a headbutt but Schultz sends him and hits…..it was some kind of a kick to the head. Either way it gets the pin in a very awkward count as the referee counted two, stopped, and then counted three. Even Schultz seems annoyed that he won that fast.

Rating: D+. Jones is another guy who wasn’t very good but was popular enough back in the day to warrant keeping a job. Schultz was fine for a quick challenger to Hogan but soon after this he would be gone due to the reasons mentioned above. The match was nothing though and the ending seemed like it wasn’t what was planned.

Greg Valentine vs. Jose Luis Rivera

Rivera jumps Valentine as he’s taking his robe off, sending Greg out to the floor. Back in and Valentine misses a charge into the corner but Jose doesn’t follow him in. Instead it’s a forearm to the face to take Jose down, allowing Greg to stomp on the leg as is his custom. A gutbuster puts Rivera down again and there’s an elbow drop to the thigh. Rivera is thrown to the floor as we’re firmly in squash territory here.

Back in and a shoulder breaker gets two for Valentine and it’s off to an armbar. Another forearm puts Rivera on the floor as Valentine is just toying with him here. Rivera comes back with some right hands, only to be knocked across the ring with a single forearm. Valentine lifts him up and drops Jose ribs first across the top rope before walking around for a bit. Rivera pounds on him in the corner but a single right hand drops him again. A suplex puts Rivera down and there are some of the heavy elbow drops from the Hammer. Figure Four goes on Rivera and we’re done.

Rating: D+. Just an extended squash here but at least it wasn’t all that long. Valentine was still a big deal at this point and he would have one last run with the Intercontinental Title soon after this. Rivera was your traditional ethnic guy who wasn’t all that great but he could fill in a spot on the card like this.

WWF World Title: Big John Studd vs. Hulk Hogan

Here’s your famous debut as Studd has a manager with him: Bobby the Brain Heenan. We get a prerecorded comment from him as he brags about leaving with the title in his first night here. It’s still Eye of the Tiger and the white trunks for Hogan which are always cool to see here. Hogan apparently cut himself on the chest during his entrance. Studd immediately heads to the apron for a meeting with Heenan as Gene warns us about what Bobby is capable of doing.

Studd takes over with a test of strength so Hulk goes with good old fashioned right hands. A running elbow in the corner has Studd on the apron and the match slows back down again. Back in and Hogan hits a big boot to the face but can’t slam Studd, which apparently would get him $10,000. Studd easily slams Hulk down and hits a middle rope forearm to the back. Off to a bearhug but Hogan holds his arm up after two drops, only to be sent into the ropes and knocked down by a big shoulder.

Studd circles the champ and hits a very slow ax handle to the back before we hit another bearhug. Hogan appears to be either dancing or shaking while in the hold but he gets his arm down inside Studd’s grip to break the hold. He can’t follow up though and Studd knocks him out to the floor. The champion is cut open and Studd pounds him from the apron, only to have Hogan come back in and pound away as is his custom. Studd is pounded down but Hogan still can’t slam him. They head to the floor and Hogan still can’t slam him, so Studd shoves him into the post and slides back in for the countout win.

Rating: D+. This was to set up a rematch and nothing more. Obviously you can’t change the title here or anything like that, but the idea of having Hogan not be able to slam him is nothing more than a way to set up a rematch a month later where he can pull the slam off. Other than that though, this was really dull stuff, but that’s par for the course for Studd most of the time.

Heenan and Studd runs off with the belt. Oh yeah it’s a rematch next month.

Ken Patera vs. Rick McGraw

Patera is a strong man with blonde hair here. We stall for over a minute while Patera takes off his warmup gear. Patera shoves him around to start but gets caught in a headlock. It’s about as exciting as it sounds so Ken takes him down with an armbar. McGraw grabs a hammerlock but again we go to the ropes. Very slow paced stuff so far. Off to a leg lock by Patera as this is somehow getting even worse. The leg is wrapped around the post and a big right hand puts McGraw on the floor. Rick pulls him down to the mat and wraps Patera’s leg around the post a few times. Back in and McGraw chokes a lot but gets clotheslined down and sent into the post. The full nelson ends McGraw pretty easily.

Rating: D-. Absolutely horrendous match here as Patera did next to nothing for the eight minutes that this went on. Yeah that whole description filled in just under eight minutes. This was horrible all around but I’d bet it was a filler after intermission for the sake of a concession stand run. Nothing to see here at all.

Adrian Adonis/Dick Murdoch/Lou Albano vs. Sgt. Slaughter/Wild Samoans

Before the match Albano says that this is due to him being accused of being a biased referee against the Samoans and the Sarge. Adonis and Murdoch are tag champions. Albano sneaks in a foreign object because that’s what he does. After a LONG stall we’re ready for the opening bell. We finally start with Afa vs. Murdoch and they trade full nelsons. It must drive Murdoch nuts to be in there against Afa as Murdoch was a member of the KKK.

That goes nowhere so here’s Adonis instead. Everything breaks down and Albano walks out like the coward he is, leaving this as a handicap match. Slaughter chases after him but comes back a few seconds later. The tag champions try to ram the Samoans’ heads together which has as little effect as you would expect it to have. Albano is back at ringside as we’ve barely had any wrestling in the first five minutes.

Adonis and Murdoch double team Sika until Albano comes in for some shots with that foreign object. Sika snaps up and it’s very quickly off to Murdoch again as we’re firmly in a comedy match at this point. Dick tries the elbow to the head and injures himself in the process. The tag champions are rammed together and Murdoch gets caught in the wrong corner. Albano is offered a chance to come in and says no way. He claims to have a bad back and sends Adonis in to face Sika.

Actually make that Sarge to a big pop and a knee drop to Adonis’ head. Murdoch is knocked to the floor as well but Slaughter goes after Albano, allowing the heels to take Slaughter down. Murdoch hits Slaughter with something from the announce table and Gorilla is freaking out. Back in and Adonis puts on a sleeper but the Samoans make the save. Off to more triple teaming in the corner and a back elbow to the face for two for Murdoch.

Adonis comes back in with a top rope elbow for two before Dick comes in to rip at Slaughter’s face. Slaughter finally gets in a shot to the face and it’s off to Sika who is dropped with a double back elbow from the champions. Albano comes in for some cheap shots but once again Sika snaps up and Lou runs away. Sika gets in a headbutt on Murdoch and it’s off to Afa. Not that the tag means much though as he is caught in a front facelock by Murdoch.

Adrian slams Sika down for two and hits a missile dropkick (a high spot in this era) for two. A top rope splash misses Afa but Murdoch breaks up a tag attempt. Afa gets in a big headbutt and it’s off to Slaughter as everything breaks down. Adonis gets tied up in the ropes so Sika and Slaughter pick up Murdoch and harpoons him into Adonis’ chest. A dropkick gets one for Slaughter and there are some headbutts by Sika.

Adonis breaks up a near fall and it’s back to Afa. Adrian gets a tag but walks into a bunch of headbutts to put him right back down. Slaughter rams Murdoch’s head into Sika’s and it’s off to Albano vs. Sarge. The Cobra Clutch is quickly put on but Adonis makes the save. Lou brings in the exhausted Murdoch as Sarge and Albano leave. Everything breaks down and Sarge runs in to slam Murdoch off the top for the pin.

Rating: C. This took awhile to get into but once it got going things improved a lot. The story makes sense as the tag champions can hang with the Samoans in a two on two match but when you give them Slaughter against the worthless Albano, Murdoch and Adonis are outmatched. It’s too long at 20 minutes but it’s not as bad as I was expecting it to be.

Mike Sharpe vs. B. Brian Blair

Before the match, Sharpe complains about not being introduced as Canada’s Greatest Athlete. Blair is still just a guy in trunks at this point. Sharpe bails to the floor right after the bell and hides on the apron when Blair wants to get going. Mike finally pulls him down and rams Blair into the announce table before we get more stalling. Back in and Blair finally gets in a shot on the leg before wrapping it around the post.

Both guys miss elbow drops and Sharpe is still talking trash. Blair puts on a wristlock but Sharpe goes to the eyes to break it up. A sunset flip out of the corner gets two for Blair and it’s back to the wristlock. Make that an armbar as the workrate really goes up. Sharpe puts on a headlock on the mat before running Blair over with some shoulders. Brian comes back with some dropkicks and armdrags to send Mike out to the floor. Back to the armbar as this long match gets even longer.

Sharpe gets up and backdrops him down for two before sending Blair throat first into the top rope. A splash gets two and it’s off to an over the shoulder backbreaker. Mike throws him through the ropes but not even out to the apron. Off to a Boston Crab but Mike isn’t putting anywhere near the amount of pressure on it that he needs to have. Blair finally kicks him off but gets placed in the corner and punched in the face.

Gene and Gorilla complain about how nothing has happened yet as Blair comes back with a running forearm to the head. A missile dropkick puts Sharpe down and some right hands do the same. Sharpe is sent to the floor and we can see the timekeeper touching his nose, meaning to go home. Back in and Sharpe pounds away in the corner before shoving the referee for the DQ.

Rating: F+. This wasn’t a bad match but good freaking grief was it ever dull. It was nearly twenty minutes of two guys that no one cared about doing nothing of note at all. Even Gene and Gorilla were complaining about how dull the match was so apparently it wasn’t just me who thought this match was boring. It’s not the guys’ fault though as they just had no business wrestling a twenty minute match.

We get the card for next month’s show, which I’ll get to eventually. It’s Tito vs. Valentine for the IC Title if nothing else. Before Fink is done though, here’s Bobby Heenan with something to say. He’s never heard of a title not changing hands on a countout, so if Hogan wants a rematch there’s a contract ready right now. However, Heenan wants it to be a countout can change the title and calls Hogan out to sign it. Cue Hogan to sign it in a pencil and that’s about it.

Pat Patterson vs. Kamala

This is your main event people and I believe it’s Patterson’s last match as a regular competitor. Kamala jumps Patterson before Pat gets his jacket off and pounds on him in the corner. Pat finally gets out of it and pokes Kamala in the eyes before stupidly trying a slam. A shot to the face ticks Kamala off but Patterson bails to the floor before pain can be inflicted. Back in and Kamala wants a test of strength but Patterson stomps on his bare feet in a smart move. Kamala shoves him down and pounds away but can’t hit the splash. Scratch that as it hits Patterson on the back for the fast pin.

Rating: D. Another uninteresting match here but at least it makes Kamala look good. Patterson was WAY past his expiration date here but at least the fans still liked him. He was much better in the ring than people remember but soon after this he would move into the backstage position that he’s most famous for.

We go to the back to hear Chief Jay Strongbow say that he isn’t sure how much longer he can do this given how strong all the new guys are. He also thinks Hulk made a big mistake by signing that contract.

Overall Rating: D-. This was insanely boring with almost nothing interesting at all. The matches weren’t even bad for the most part but they were just so freaking dull that it made a two hour and twenty minute show feel about five times that long. There’s nothing worth watching on here but next month’s show should be much better given the card announced.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @Kbreviews and pick up my book on the History of the WWE Championship from Amazon for just $5 at:

The top five is perfect.  The rest…..uh yeah.

1. Roddy Piper
2. Ric Flair and the Four Horsemen
3. Mr. McMahon
4. Ted DiBiase
5. Hollywood Hogan
6. HHH
7. Superstar Billy Graham
8. Bobby Heenan
9. Gorgeous George
10. Jake Roberts
11. Rick Rude
12. JBL
13. The Fabulous Freebirds
14. The Original Sheik
15. Chris Jericho
16. Sherri Martel
17. Mr. Perfect
18. Killer Kowalski
19. Jim Cornette
20. Edge
21. Freddie Blassie
22. Undertaker
23. Sgt. Slaughter
24. Harley Race
25. Vader
26. Nick Bockwinkel
27. Paul Orndorff
28. Fabulous Moolah
29. Raven
30. Jerry Lawler
31. Kevin Sullivan
32. Randy Orton
33. Terry Funk
34. Abdullah the Butcher
35. Paul Heyman
36. Ivan Koloff
37. Ernie Ladd
38. CM Punk
39. Dudley Boyz
40. Don Muraco
41. Kane
42. Brock Lesnar
43. Eddie Guerrero
44. Eric Bischoff
45. Andre the Giant
46. Iron Sheik
47. Mark Henry
48. Vickie Guerrero
49. Randy Savage
50. Batista

Harley Race being 12 spots below JBL is laughable.  Also, where in the world are Jimmy Hart and Shawn Michaels?

Monday Nitro #30
Date: April 1, 1996
Location: CSU Convocation Center, Cleveland, Ohio
Attendance: 7,000
Commentators: Bobby Heenan, Eric Bischoff, Steve McMichael

 

We’re in the eighth month of Nitro and finally into the 30s of the shows. The company moves towards Slamboree which hasn’t been mentioned yet but there’s some stuff to get through first. This is kind of a dead period for a few weeks so there isn’t much to say about this one. Let’s get to it.

 

We open in the ring with Sting and Giant just about to start us off here. Well ok then.

 

Giant vs. Sting

 

This would be the main event of said Slamboree PPV. Giant swings but misses as we’re told that this was supposed to be Sting/Giant (why?) vs. Harlem Heat but Jimmy paid off the actual team. Sting hammers away but can’t get anywhere with him. Cross body just bounces off Giant which always looks cool. Sting manages to send him to the floor but Giant grabs him around the throat for a chokeslam from the apron. Sting manages to get a dropkick to send Giant flying to the floor. Luger runs in to help Sting and it’s thrown out. Too short to rate.

 

Cue the theme song.

 

We see a clip from before the show with Jimmy paying off Harlem Heat to leave their tag title opportunity. Wait why would Giant be Sting’s partner when Sting and Luger are champions?

 

Flair defends against Luger later.

 

Nasty Boys vs. Road Warriors vs. Steiner Brothers

 

Rick vs. Knobbs to start us off in a rare (for this period and company) three way dance. Things quickly break down with Knobbs vs. Animal. I wish they were doing the version of this they were doing later in the history of the company where it would be three guys in the ring at once. Scott gets a pumphandle slam to Hawk for no cover. Hawk rams into the post shoulder first as this is kind of hard to follow.

 

Back in and the shoulder is fine. Hawk takes Scott down with a neckbreaker and a fist drop for two. Animal vs. Scott now and Animal is sent into Rick who drills him and gets two after being tagged. WOW that was a badly written sentence. Sags apparently tags in and the Nastys beat up Scott. They’re tagging in and out insanely fast here. Hawk fights Sags on the floor and now has a choke on Rick in the ring. I have no idea how they keep jumping but they’re not editing it or anything. It’s that big a mess.

 

Knobs hammers away on Rick and we take a break. There’s an explosion of pyro in front of a Nitro logo which probably scares half the crowd to death. Back with Rick vs. Animal. Now Sags just runs in when Animal tags Hawk. Ok so I’m not completely insane here. Knobs covers Hawk for two somehow. I’ve been watching this and I have no idea how we’re getting from point A to point B.

 

Sags and Scott come in and make that Animal vs. Rick. I want this to end very badly as it’s getting very annoying. Now Knobs is in there. You’re supposed to tag I think but it doesn’t seem like they are. Knobs sends Rick HEAD FIRST into the post. That looked sick. Now Public Enemy comes out and hammers everyone. In the insanity Scott pins Knobs to win. What the heck ever man.

 

Rating: F. In a match you’re supposed to be able to tell what’s going on. This was like something out of ECW’s worst nightmares. Terrible match and there was no way to tell what was going on as the rules kept being thrown out. Horrible match so of course it got about 15 minutes. Get on to ANYTHING else.

 

Hulk Hogan/Booty Man vs. Arn Anderson/Kevin Sullivan

 

Gee I wonder who wins here. After the entrances we take a break, complete with an ad for the Power Plant, set to what would become La Parka’s music. Heenan says tonight is his last night on Nitro for some reason. Booty Man vs. Anderson to start us off. They head to the floor with Anderson ramming him into the railing. Hogan (I think debuting the long tights here) takes Anderson’s head off with a clothesline. Scratch that as he had them at the PPV.

 

Off to Booty Man vs. Sullivan now as we’re just waiting on the hot tag to Hogan here. Hogan finally comes in and gets ZERO reaction. Anderson takes him back to the corner as we continue to talk about Heenan leaving. I don’t remember that at all but I doubt anything comes of it. Hogan gets a hot shot of all things and a double noggin knocker to make sure we’re still in the Hogan comfort zone.

 

Back off to Booty Man with Woman SCREECHING for Anderson to come on. Come on who? Uh I mean what. Yeah that’s it. Booty Man hammers on Sullivan on the floor and then goes back in for a sunset flip on Arn for two as Sullivan saves. Woman claws at Booty’s eyes (did I really just say that?) as we hear about how Woman wearing white is supposed to be bad.

 

Booty Man is sent to the floor again and we get into a standard heel formula with Booty Man playing Ricky Morton. And never mind as Hogan is tagged in rather fast. Still no reaction but the human sun is in there now. Liz, looking AWESOME in a leather skirt and thigh high boots, tries to help Anderson. Kimberly gives Hogan a show and it goes into Sullivan’s eye to end this.

 

Rating: D. Another weak main event level tag match here with nothing going on for the most part. It’s more Hogan vs. Horsemen/Dungeon to further prove that the NWO was desperately needing. I think the vast majority of people were just done with this feud but they kept it going anyway. Didn’t like this one at all.

 

Booty Man goes back to get the shoe and gets beaten down a bit.

 

Gene comes in to talk to the winners and Booty Man says he has an idea. Why do I have a feeling it involves bags of cocaine? Apparently it’s a gimmick match of some sort.

 

WCW World Title: Lex Luger vs. Ric Flair

 

No show on the 8^th apparently. Debra McMichael is in the front row which would eventually lead to foreshadowing. Luger challenging Flair for the world title just feels right. Flair struts a lot to start as you would expect. Luger overpowers him as you would also expect. Well at least they’re doing things simply to start. Press slam sends Flair down. This is about the same opening of their matches they always had which is fine.

 

Flair gets in a shot and works Luger over in the corner. Luger fires away with clotheslines and Flair takes a break. Back in and it’s a straight thumb to the eye to put Luger on defense again. Luger gets going again as this crowd is DEAD. They’ve been this way all night though so it’s not just the match. Luger chases the girls off and Flair is able to get a knee in to take over for about the fourth time.

 

Bischoff uses the term stomping a mudhole which Austin certainly wasn’t using yet. Heenan talks about taking some time off to relax which I think would set up him being the coach for the Horsemen at the Great American Bash. Figure Four goes on and Luger almost gets pinned in it. Luger gets up and a sunset flip gets two. Superplex to Flair and Luger growls at him. Powerslam hits and Woman pops up with a cup of coffee. Rack goes on but Liz has the referee. Coffee to Luger’s eyes sets up a rollup (and feet on the ropes of course) for Flair to retain.

 

Rating: C-. This was there for the sake of having a main event. That’s not so bad but at the same time it could have been more. These two could have a passable match in their sleep which is a good thing. At least it wasn’t that bad, but it was there for the sake of being there which is never a good thing. Not awful though.

 

Heenan says goodbye to the announcers. He has one more thing to say. APRIL FOOL’S! That was awesome as I totally forgot it was April 1.

 

Overall Rating: D. I wasn’t into this one at all. They were seemingly running around like crazy with no real idea of where they were going with this. It’s not their worst show but it clearly wasn’t one of their better ones. That week off probably helped them a lot as they needed time to recharge. Pretty clear they had no plan for Slamboree other than Lethal Lottery, which sucked. Weak show tonight.

 

Remember: no show for April 8. Next show will be the one dates April 15.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the WWE Championship from Amazon at:

 

Royal Rumble 1992
Date: January 19, 1992
Location: Knickerbocker Arena, Albany, New York
Attendance: 17,000
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

This year’s Rumble is often called the greatest ever, but I wonder how much of that is because of Bobby Heenan’s masterful commentary. The WWF Title is on the line in the Rumble, which to date (2012) is the only time this has ever happened. I could see that being a really good stipulation again, but for some reason it never has again. I remember loving this show so let’s get to it.

We start with the usual listing of most of the people in the Rumble, all of whom are #1 contenders I suppose.

Heenan is betting on Flair for tonight’s Rumble. Also we’ve got a NEW Intercontinental Champion as Mountie has beaten Bret Hart over the weekend. Now there’s something you don’t see everyday.

Orient Express vs. New Foundation

It’s Owen/Neidhart as the Foundation here. Owen and Kato start thing off here. All four guys look like they’re in pajamas here. Owen takes him down to the mat by the arm before climbing up the ropes (not in the corner mind you but just the ropes) to backflip into the ring for an armdrag. A rana puts Kato down and it’s off to Neidhart vs. Tanaka. Tanaka gets run over as well, so here’s Owen to beat him up.

Tanaka gets caught by an enziguri and it’s back to Neidhart. The Express gets clotheslined down by Jim and Owen adds a double cross body for two. A spinwheel kick gets the same for Hart so Kato tries to come in sans tag. The distraction lets Fuji hit Owen with the cane to finally give the Express control. Tanaka hooks a chinlock as this isn’t exactly as fast paced as last year’s opener.

Owen gets to do Bret’s chest to the buckle bump before charging into a superkick in the other corner for two. After Kato comes in and does nothing, here’s Tanaka again for a headbutt to the abdomen. A chinlock goes nowhere but a headbutt gets two on Owen. Neidhart gets the tag but the referee doesn’t see it of course. The distraction allows Fuji to put the cane on the corner and Owen’s shoulder goes through it in a loud crunch.

It only gets two though as Owen gets a leg over the rope. Kato channels his inner Anderson with a hammerlock slam before it’s back to Tanaka. Owen finally escapes and things break down for a bit, resulting in a double clothesline for two on Hart. A superkick to the chest doesn’t put Owen down, but Tanaka jumping over Kato to land on Hart’s back does. Hart comes back with a dropkick to take out both members of the Express at once. There’s the hot tag to Neidhart and house is cleaned. Owen dives onto Kato before a Rocket Launcher gets the pin on Tanaka.

Rating: B-. Decent match here but it felt like they were trying to do the same match that worked so well in 1991. The problem was the Express wasn’t anything that good anymore and the team was gone almost immediately after this. Either way, the match wasn’t bad and it’s fine for an opener. The New Foundation never quite did anything until 1994 when Owen was a heel.

We get a clip from the house show where Mountie won the IC Title from Bret. Post match he kept beating on Bret but Roddy Piper came out for the save.

Jimmy and Mountie brag about winning the title. Mountie is ready for Piper tonight.

Piper is ready for Mountie and tells Mountie to just try to take his manhood.

Intercontinental Title: Roddy Piper vs. The Mountie

Piper slowly removes his kilt and Mountie cracks jokes. When the champ turns his head, Piper shoves the kilt in his face and takes over quickly. We head to the floor with Mountie quickly reeling. Back in the ring and Mountie chokes a bit before getting punched in the face. A very delayed bulldog puts Mountie down and Piper easily wins a slugout. He misses a dropkick though and Mountie puts on a half nelson. A jumping back elbow gets two for Mountie as does a sunset flip for Piper. Piper atomic drops him to the apron but Mountie skins the cat. He also collides with Jimmy Hart and the sleeper gives Piper the title.

Rating: D. The match itself sucked but there was never any doubt about this match at all. Mountie is about as textbook a definition of a transitional champion as you’ll ever see and the place went NUTS when Piper won the title. This would be Piper’s only singles title in the WWF and his only title period (other than those before he got to the WWF in the first place) until he won the US Title in WCW for less than two weeks.

Hogan says he has no friends in the Rumble tonight. He talks to Lord Alfred Hayes about tea because Hayes is British and that’s about it.

The Bushwhackers and Jamison…..oh geez it’s him. This is one of the most annoying characters in wrestling history. He’s supposed to be the ultimate nerd, with a nasal voice, taped up glasses, a suit that doesn’t fit, and every other stereotype you can think of. Oh and he smells like sardines apparently. Let’s get this over with.

Beverly Brothers vs. Bushwhackers

This is more about the managers (Genius and Jamison respectively) more than the teams. Jamison chews on his tie as the Whackers do their arm thing to the audience. The Whackers lick each other and Jamison pulls out a roll for a snack. One of the Beverlies slaps Butch in the head so the Beverlies get chased to the floor. We FINALLY get started with Blake vs. Luke with the blonde (the Beverlies) in control.

The Beverly gets bitten on the tights and the Whackers clear the ring again. Jamison throws bread at Genius as the match stalls again. Now Jamison blows his nose in his sock. The fans don’t care at all here. Beau comes in now to beat on Butch but for the third time in like five minutes the Whackers clear the ring again. The Beverlies try to sneak up on the Whackers but keep getting chased off.

Double teaming to Luke’s back finally gets us down to a match, but let’s keep the camera on Jamison. Jamison keeps chewing on his tie as this keeps up the dullness. A guillotine gets two on Luke as we hit the highlight of the match. No seriously, other than that it’s been “comedy” and punching. Genius slaps Jamison to no reaction from anyone at all. A neckbreaker and legdrop hit Luke for no cover. Luke gets away with a move that I’m too bored to remember and it’s off to Butch. Things break down and Beau hits a top rope ax handle on Butch for the pin.

Rating: T. As in The Worst Match In Rumble History. Literally. Up to this point the Rumble has had some dull matches but this was absolutely horrible. There’s nothing of value here at all and it went on for FIFTEEN MINUTES. The Beverlies weren’t even over so this just kept going and going without ever getting anywhere. Absolutely terrible.

Jamison kicks Genius in the shin post match in another moment that gets no reaction.

The LOD says they’ll still have the belts after tonight and the Disasters’ tongues will be hanging out like dead deer. Did I mention Hawk was pretty insane at this point?

Tag Titles: Legion of Doom vs. Natural Disasters

LOD is defending here. Typhoon (formerly Tugboat) and Hawk start things off. They collide a few times with no one going anywhere so Hawk goes up and takes Typhoon down with a top rope clothesline. Off to Quake who Hawk can’t hurt either. A dropkick doesn’t have any effect so Hawk convinces Quake to try one of his own. Guess how well that one goes. Off to Animal for a slugout which is a draw.

Animal starts hitting the ropes and speeds WAY up before they hit a double clothesline to put both guys down. Animal picks up Quake for a slam but can’t turn him over, giving Quake two. Off to Typhoon who gets kicked in the face and clotheslined down. Back to the Bird Man as we get a lot more of the collisions that went over so well earlier. Typhoon finally takes him down and Hawk is in trouble via a lot of back pain.

It’s time for the hallmark of any power match: the bearhug. Quake comes back in and walks over Hawk a few times. Back to the bearhug for a little more time killing until it’s finally back to Animal. Everybody brawls to the floor and it’s a lame double countout. Oh wait Typhoon got back in so the Disasters win. Sure why not.

Rating: D. I love the LOD but this match sucked. At the end of the day, this was the totally wrong matchup for them as their entire offense revolved around throwing people around. This was around the time when Hawk was literally on the verge of a breakdown every day but Vince couldn’t quite convince then to drop the titles, until they did it on a house show which was never aired because LOD didn’t want to lose their heat. It was a different time to say the least.

The Disasters and Hart yell in the back a lot.

Roddy Piper is all fired up about winning the title and dedicates the win to his son Colt. He wants the world title now.

We get a clip from the Barber Shop incident where Shawn turned heel, igniting his singles push in the greatest team split ever.

Ric Flair says he drew #3 but when your name is Ric Flair, that’s not a problem. This is a Coliseum Video exclusive so Heenan doesn’t know yet.

Time for the interviews from people in the Rumble: Savage, Sid, Repo Man, Bulldog, Roberts, Flair (with Perfect talking with him too. You know, because Flair needs someone to talk for him), Undertaker (Bearer talks for him a bit too) and Hogan.

We get a statement from the biggest waste of oxygen that has ever been a boss in wrestling, Jack Tunney. He basically says the winner of this (he forgets the name of the Rumble) is the world champion. As he’s talking, here’s a recap of the title situation. Taker beat Hogan for the title at Survivor Series but Flair interfered. Hogan got a rematch about a week later but also kind of cheated to win it back. The title was vacated and put up for grabs in this year’s Rumble, making it by far the biggest Rumble of all time up to that point.

Royal Rumble

Davey Boy Smith is #1 and DiBiase is #2. The slugout is on quickly with Bulldog pounding away but getting sent to the apron. DiBiase stops paying attention and doesn’t realize that Smith didn’t hit the floor. A clothesline is enough to get rid of DiBiase and leave Bulldog alone in the ring. In at #3: Ric Flair. Heenan: “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!” Gorilla starts listing off stats about how Flair has no chance and Heenan explodes. He says he can’t be objective and you can hear Gorilla roll his eyes.

The gorilla press puts Flair down but he pokes Smith in the eyes to get a breather. It’s only temporary though as Davey clotheslines him down. Jerry Sags is #4 and HE BE CLUBBERIN TONY!!! Smith gets double teamed as Heenan is trying to figure out how long Flair would have to be in the match. Smith comes back with a double clothesline and knocks Sags out. Notice how they’re keeping the ring emptier here, which is a very good change from the 1991 version.

Haku is #5 and he immediately goes after Smith. Flair goes after Haku, sending Heenan into another fit. “HAVE YOU GONE NUTS???” Flair heads to the floor under the rope as Haku hits a piledriver on Smith. Flair goes after Haku again and hits the knee drop. Haku pounds on Ric in the corner but Smith tosses the Tongan. Shawn Michaels is #6 and he starts firing away punches to Flair. A superkick drops Flair and a gorilla press drops Shawn. I’ll let you guess who slammed Michaels.

Flair comes back to drop both guys as Heenan wants a drink. His panic in every line he says is great stuff. Shawn gets caught on the ropes and crotched, followed by Davey throwing him to the apron. Tito Santana is #7 as we get down to a decent tag match, another Rumble tradition. Flair gets Smith to the apron but Tito saves. In far less than two minutes, it’s Barbarian at #8. Heenan: “He doesn’t like anybody. When I managed him he barely liked me!”

Things slow down a bit as Davey keeps getting sent to the apron. Flair tries to dump Tito and Shawn at the same time but can’t get either guy out. Texas Tornado is #9 and Heenan is losing it. “THEY JUST KEEP GETTING BIGGER!” Von Erich goes right after Flair before shifting over to Michaels. Smith slingshots Michaels, who has to jump a LONG way to get to the buckle.

Santana stomps on Flair as Repo Man is #10. Santana hits a cross body on Barbarian and Flair hits Tornado with LOUD chops. Valentine is #11 and he gets in a chopping match with Flair. Shawn is literally hanging on by his feet. Nikolai Volkoff is #12 (Heenan: “A 320lb Lithuanian!” but Repo Man dumps him in about a minute. Apparently he was a sub for Jannetty after the window thing. That makes more sense. While that’s going on, Valentine has Flair in the Figure Four to send Heenan into a new level of panic.

The Boss Man is #13 and he punches everyone in sight. Valentine is out and Shawn starts his goofy selling. Boss Man throws out Repo Man, giving us a current grouping of Von Erich, Michaels, Boss Man, Haku, Santana, Smith and Flair. Flair backdrops Smith out and does the same to Von Erich in just a few seconds. Hercules is #14 as Santana and Shawn eliminate each other.

Barbarian helps Flair with Boss Man, so Flair turns on Barbarian because he, you know, Flair. Hercules dumps Barbarian so Flair dumps Hercules. It’s Boss Man and Flair alone now as Heenan needs oxygen. Boss Man hits a spin kick of all things and a right hand, but misses a charge and eliminates himself. Heenan: “FLAIR WINS!”

Piper is #15 and the crowd is right back into this. We’re clearly into the second stage now and Heenan LOSES IT. Piper backdrops him down and they head to the floor for a bit. Back in and Piper goes old school with an airplane spin, making Bobby want to cry. There’s the sleeper but Jake Roberts is #16. This is when he’s pure evil so the crowd goes into a hush. Jake sits in the corner as Flair is still in the sleeper.

Roberts finally breaks up the hold and works over Piper before hitting the short clothesline o Flair. Piper breaks up the DDT (Heenan: “Oh thank you Piper. It’s not a skirt, it’s a kilt!”) and Flair puts Jake in the Figure Four, only to have Piper stomp away on Ric (Heenan: “YOU NO GOOD DIRTY SKUNK! IT IS A SKIRT!”). Jim Duggan is #17 and he immediately goes after Flair in the corner.

Jake atomic drops Duggan to put all four guys on the mat for a breather. IRS is #18 and he too goes after Flair. Duggan grabs IRS by the tie (Heenan: “He’s got him by the tongue!”) and pounds away. Duggan saves Piper for no apparent reason and Flair gets beaten up some more. Snuka is #19 and for some reason he saves Flair. Snuka headbutts Duggan which has no effect on either guy of course. Flair, ever the grateful guy, pokes Snuka in the eye.

Piper chops Flair half to death in the corner and the Undertaker is #20. At the moment we’ve got Taker, Flair, Piper, Snuka, IRS, Roberts and Duggan in the ring. Taker immediately knocks out Snuka, so Flair goes after the Dead Man. Heenan: “WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU???” Duggan goes over to Taker and is immediately kicked in the balls. We get one of the major clock issues that would happen throughout the match, as Gorilla says Flair has been in there over 42 minutes. The whole match hasn’t even gone 38 yet and Flair didn’t even start. This will get stretched even farther later.

IRS goes to the middle rope for some reason but hops down a few seconds later. Taker grabs Duggan and Flair by the throat as Randy Savage is #21. Roberts immediately hides on the floor until Taker decks Savage. Randy ducks Jake’s short clothesline and ERUPTS on him, eliminating Roberts via a high knee. Savage screws up by jumping over the top to get to Roberts. Taker goes to the floor and throws him back in, but Savage goes after Jake again. The ruling is that Savage wasn’t thrown to the floor so he’s still in. Ignore Andre eliminating himself in 1989 of course.

Flair comes back with a low blow on Taker which has zero effect at all. Berzerker is #22 and we’ve got IRS, Berzerker, Duggan, Savage, Flair, Piper and Undertaker. Berzerker hits a choke bomb on Savage as Virgil is #23. Everyone goes into one corner of the ring for some reason, with Flair chopping at Taker like a schmuck. Colonel Mustafa (Iron Sheik) is #24. Things slow down a bit as we need someone to come in and clear things out. Rick Martel is #25 and he pounds on the other Ric in the corner.

Savage dumps Mustafa and gets chokes by Taker for his efforts. Hogan is #26 (does he EVER get a bad number?) and he goes right for Taker and Flair. Heenan starts bargaining with God as Martel is sent through the ropes to the floor. Hogan clotheslines Taker out and dumps Berzerker as well. Duggan and Virgil put each other out as the ring clears up a lot. Skinner is #27, giving us Skinner, Hogan, Flair, Piper, Savage, Martel and IRS.

Hogan puts Flair on the apron as Heenan wants another drink. A clothesline puts Flair down again and Sgt. Slaughter is #28. Someone dumps Skinner as Flair officially gets the Rumble record. Sure why not. Sid Justice is #29 and he goes for IRS. Flair pounds on Hogan before shifting over to Sid. Flair pulls Sid to the mat but Sid nips up and clotheslines him down. Warlord is #30, giving us a final grouping of Martel, Piper, Hogan, Flair, Savage, Sid, Slaughter, IRS and Warlord.

Hogan and Flair fight on the floor with Flair getting suplexed. Slaughter gets eliminated by Sid and Hogan kicks Flair down. Piper is sent to the apron by IRS but Piper grabs the tie to eliminate the tax dude. Hogan Hulks Up on Flair but stops to eliminate Warlord with Sid’s help. Justice dumps Martel and Piper, giving us a final four of Savage, Flair, Hogan and Sid. That’s quite a group.

Sid tosses Savage and Flair tries to chop Hogan in the corner because that’s what Ric Flair does. In a famous ending, Hogan punches Flair to the apron but as he’s dumping Ric out, Sid comes up from behind to dump Hulk. Hogan grabs Sid’s arm, allowing Flair to come up from behind and dump Justice, giving Flair the title and send Bobby into orgasmic bliss.

Rating: A. This is Ric Flair’s coming out party in the WWF and it worked perfectly. There are a few down parts to it and while the 1990 edition was more consistently exciting and had a better overall structure, this was all about drama. It also helps that the match actually meant something, as the title was officially on the line. Excellent Rumble and a true surprise to see Flair win the title.

Sid and Hogan have a shoving match post match, setting up their match at Wrestlemania.

Jack Tunney presents an exhausted Flair with the title in the back. Flair gives a victory speech, saying this is the greatest moment in his life. He says this is the only title that means you’re the best in the world and Heenan gushes some more.

Overall Rating: B. This is a hard one to grade because the stuff before the Rumble is HORRIBLE. The Rumble however is a masterpiece with Flair and it more than saves the show. There’s nothing else on the card that you would want to watch, other than maybe the Piper title win if you’re a big fan of the guy. Other than that though, there’s nothing to see here other than the Rumble itself.

Ratings Comparison

New Foundation vs. Orient Express

Original: C+

Redo: B-

Roddy Piper vs. Mountie

Original: B

Redo: D

Beverly Brothers vs. Bushwhackers

Original: F-

Redo: T (For The Worst Match In Rumble History)

Natural Disasters vs. Legion of Doom

Original: D

Redo: D

Royal Rumble

Original: A+

Redo: A

Overall Rating

Original: B

Redo: B

Other than Piper, this is almost the same set of ratings.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/11/royal-rumble-count-up-1992/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Watching a Nitro from 1997 and it made me miss something.It’s the night after Bash at the Beach 1997 and Heenan is talking incessantly about how you ABSOLUTELY HAVE TO see the encore.  That’s something you NEVER hear anymore about PPVs.  Anymore today it’s basically “here’s what we’ve got, buy it.  Please?”  Gene Okerlund and Bobby Heenan were masters at sounding like used car salesmen or carnival barkers, where after hearing them talk for 20 minutes you had to buy the PPV, just because you had heard so much about it.

 

Another thing you hardly ever heard said anymore about WWE PPVs: the date of the show.  Watch an old WWF TV show and you’ll hear the date of their next PPV probably 10 times.  That’s done for a reason: you hear the date so often that you start counting down to it in your head and on the day or before it, you snap and order the show because you NEED to see it.  Now it’s always “in just under two weeks” or whatever they say anymore, which is something easier to forget.

 

Don’t beg us to buy a PPV.  Sell it to us.

Survivor Series 1989
Date: November 23, 1989
Location: Rosemont Horizon, Chicago, Illinois
Attendance: 15,294
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Jesse Ventura

We’re at a major changing point with this show, as we now have four man teams and five full matches, instead of the previous years with four matches. The matches are shorter now, but there are some kind of head scratching booking choices here. We do however get the greatest Survivor Series team ever on this show though, so we have that to look forward to. Let’s get to it.

Also stay tuned after the end for a special BONUS MATCH REVIEW!

We open with a video shot from a car going up to the arena, going through the doors, at the souvenir stands (12.99 for a shirt. Today that might get you a sleeve) and now it’s time for opening show promos.

Hogan is thankful for time with his family and to be the strongest force in the universe. And for his team.

DiBiase is glad he’s rich.

Jake likes his snake and the DDT.

Demolition is glad they don’t have to fight each other.

Savage is glad he’s the Macho King.

Duggan is proud to be an American.

Bravo is glad Earthquake is on his side.

Dusty is thankful for his polka dots.

Beefcake for cutting hair.

Martel for his looks.

Rude for his body.

Piper because he’s not Ricky Rude. Burn.

Genius for being the smartest man in the world.

Perfect for being his name.

The Bushwackers for sardine stuffing.

Heenan for being surrounded by the Heenan Family.

Warrior should be thankful that Ritalin is soon to be available.

We run down the cards with those nifty squares.

Dream Team vs. Enforcers

Dusty Rhodes, Brutus Beefcake, Tito Santana, Red Rooster

Big Bossman, Bad News Brown, Rick Martel, Honky Tonk Man

This is mainly over Dusty vs. Bossman which is Dusty’s first big feud in the company. Dusty stole the nightstick and the hat which has ticked Bossman off. The rest of the guys are there because it’s Survivor Series and we need six more guys. Brutus’ music was awesome, just like the names for the teams. Tito and Honky start things off and for the third straight year Honky and Brutus are in the opening match on this show. I’m not sure what that means.

Tito takes over quickly but Honky gets in one kick before RUNNING over to make a tag to Martel. Rick dropkicks Tito down as Jesse talks about the now broken up Strike Force. Tito atomic drops Martel for two and everyone but Bad News gets in the ring at once. Nothing happens but it’s cool to see. Brown not getting in is perfect for his character too. Off to the Boss Man who is immediately armdragged down by Tito.

Off to Dusty who pounds away as the fans go nuts. Chicago was a big NWA town so it’s easy to see why he’s popular. Brutus comes in to another pop but Boss Man takes him down with a few shots to the back. Honky comes in but misses a fist drop. Beefcake hammers away but Martel makes a blind tag and takes over on Brutus. Rooster comes in and the place goes quiet. When you can’t get a reaction in Chicago, things aren’t that good for you.

Martel hits some knees to the face and it’s off to Honky who dances a lot. Boss Man comes in and they slug it out with the big man taking over with ease. Martel comes back in and drops some knees but gets rolled up for two. Back to Honky as Rooster is in trouble. I’m digging these four man versions already as the match seems less crowded and the guys can stay in the ring a little longer. Rooster and Honky collide and it’s a double tag to give us another battle of Strike Force.

Tito goes loco on Martel and beats him down, but Martel breaks the figure four. Santana tries an O’Connor Roll but Martel rolls through and grabs the trunks for the first elimination. Dusty comes in next and hits a dropkick (and a decent one) followed by the big elbow…for two? We must be in the WWF. Brutus comes in to work on the arm and stomp on Martel’s face when he tries a reverse monkey flip.

Rooster comes in and can’t seem to figure out what to do with a headlock. Martel is like screw you you nitwit and backbreaks him down. Off to Boss Man who slaps on a bearhug. Gorilla keeps calling Brutus the team captain but the team is called the Dream Team and Dusty came out last. Rooster bites out of the hold and Boss Man tags Bad News who isn’t interested in coming in.

After Bad News gets pulled in he takes over because he’s fighting a freaking rooster. Just like last year though, Bad News accidentally gets hit by his partner and he walks out. It’s three on three now and we have Boss Man vs. Brutus. After the Barber gets beaten on some more it’s off to Honky for a belly to back suplex. Out of nowhere Brutus hits a high knee to Honky for the fast pin, making it 3-2 (Brutus, Dusty and Rooster vs. Boss Man and Martel).

Martel immediately comes in and puts a chinlock on Brutus which doesn’t last long. The second version of it does though as the match slows down a lot. A backbreaker puts Brutus down and he goes into the buckle a few times. Brutus grabs a sunset flip again out of nowhere to eliminate Martel and it’s 3-1. Brutus tags in Rooster to throw a bone to Boss Man and after some punches from Rooster, the Boss Man Slam gets the fast pin and it’s 2-1.

Dusty is in next but it’s quickly off to Brutus for some knees to the chest. Back to Dusty as the good guys are using some intelligence (yes, Dusty and Brutus are using intelligence) with the fast tags. Boss Man gets whipped into the ropes and Dusty takes him down with a cross body, likely rupturing at least three vital organs of Boss Man and getting the final pin. I may have been right about those organs.

Rating: C+. Nothing special here but it was fine for an opener. The fans liked most of the good guys and other than Rooster, that was a solid set of guys. The match wasn’t competitive or anything for the most part after the first five minutes but there was nothing particularly bad about it I guess.

Boss Man destroys Dusty with the nightstick and cuffs him to the ropes to keep up the beating. Brutus makes the save with the clippers.

Boss Man brags about what he just did.

The King’s Court, Savage’s team, is read.

The 4x4s say the same thing but much louder.

4x4s vs. King’s Court

Jim Duggan, Ronnie Garvin, Bret Hart, Hercules

Randy Savage, Earthquake, Dino Bravo, Greg Valentine

The 4x4s all jog to the ring with boards in their hands. This would be the second or third time that Bret was teased as a singles guy but it wouldn’t click for another year and a half. The only major feud here is Savage vs. Duggan over the crown but that’s about it. The board carriers clear the ring and stand in the ring for awhile. It looks like we start with Garvin vs. Savage but Duggan chases Savage to the floor before it’s Hercules who actually starts for the 4x4s.

Herc pounds away and slams Savage down, but right into the King’s corner and it’s off to Valentine. Greg gets atomic dropped and it’s off to Bret. Bret works on the arm for a bit and it’s off to Duggan for some right hands. Garvin comes in and I forgot about this feud. That’s likely due to me trying to block anything Garvin related from my mind. Garvin gets taken into the heel corner and it’s off to Bravo for some power.

Hercules comes back in to make it power vs. power with the dark haired guy (Hercules for you young’uns) taking over. And never mind as Earthquake comes in, kills Hercules with a shot to the head and hits the Earthquake for the elimination. Duggan comes in and collides with Quake (he’s still Canadian Earthquake here but that didn’t last long at all) but can’t do anything to him. Bret, being the smart guy that he is, sneaks up on Earthquake and school boys him so Duggan can take him down.

Off to Garvin who pounds away but Earthquake is like boy I’m gonna make you my pizza toppings. Bravo comes in to pound away on Garvin as does Valentine. The Figure Four is countered and Garvin rolls Hammer (Valentine) up for two. Savage drops a knee and it’s back to Bravo to work Garvin over a bit more. A backslide gets two for Ronnie and it’s back to Savage very quickly.

It’s back to Valentine even faster and they chop it out but Garvin makes a blind tag to Duggan who hits the three point clothesline to eliminate Valentine and tie things up. Bravo comes in again and is quickly followed by Savage and then Earthquake. Quake misses a big elbow and there’s the tag to Garvin. He beats on whomever he can and headbutts Bravo down. Here’s the still stupid Garvin Stomp (Orton does it now) and he tries the Sharpshooter (Garvin used it before Bret) but Dino breaks it up.

NOW we get somewhere with a double tag to Savage vs. Hart. These two had an awesome match on SNME a year or so before this and Bret takes over with an atomic drop. Bret loads up something on the legs but Savage dives away and tags in Bravo again. The middle rope elbow gets two for Bret and it’s back to Garvin who immediately walks into a side suplex to make it 3-2.

It’s Duggan vs. Earthquake again with Jim pounding away in the corner. Bret gets the tag and a double clothesline puts the big man down. Savage comes in and Bret is all like BRING IT ON. Well maybe not that loud but you get the idea. Savage gets tied up in the ropes and Duggan chokes away like the hero he is. Randy gets Bret down and misses a knee drop, allowing Hart to hit a backbreaker for two.

A small package gets two for Bret and Savage charges into a boot. Bret misses a middle rope elbow and it’s off to Bravo again. Dino puts on a bearhug because this match hasn’t dragged enough already. Off to Earthquake for some high powered choking followed by an elbow drop for two. The crowd popped a bit for the kickout which is more than can be said for most of this match.

Bret finally breaks free and tags Hacksaw in again so he can slam Savage. And never mind as Bret tags back in about 15 seconds later. Bravo works over the mostly beaten Bret and Hart misses a charge, going shoulder first into the post. A shoulder breaker sets up the Savage Elbow to make it 3-1.

It’s off to Quake to beat on Duggan in the corner but he misses a charge and everyone comes in. Duggan throws everyone into the corner into Earthquake and the Court all bails to the floor. Savage and Bravo get clotheslined down but Quake jumps Duggan to take him down. A big elbow gets two on Duggan and it’s back to Bravo. Duggan avoids a charging Savage but Sherri lowbridges him and it eventually draws a countout.

Rating: D+. For the life of me I don’t get why Duggan didn’t get pinned here. The ending is rather lame and it doesn’t help a match that ran WAY too long anyway. You could easily cut ten minutes out of this and no one would have missed anything at all. The match was dull outside of the moments when Bret was in there, which is something we’ll touch on more later.

Duggan chases them off with the board.

The Million Dollar Team is ready for a Thanksgiving feast in the form of the Hulkamaniacs.

Dusty Rhodes is hurt badly.

The Genius reads a poem about Thanksgiving.

Hulkamaniacs vs. Million Dollar Team

Hulk Hogan, Demolition, Jake Roberts

Ted DiBiase, Zeus, Powers of Pain

My goodness that’s an amazing face team. Ok, so now I get to explain Zeus. A month or two ago, WWE released No Holds Barred, a movie Hogan made in the late 80s, on DVD. The villain in the movie is named Zeus and you may notice he’s here. Zeus is played by an actor (not a wrestler mind you) named Tom Lister and the idea is that he’s living his character and is coming to beat Hogan up “in real life” because he lost in the movie. This would be like the guy who played Goldfinger trying to get revenge on Sean Connery. To make things even better, this was originally going to be the main event of Wrestlemania 6.

I’m sure you can see the problems mounting up already, with the main one being that Zeus doesn’t know how to wrestle. Other than that, there’s the idea that the movie barely broke even so a lot of people didn’t get the idea of the story. A positive twist to this is that a lot of people didn’t get the idea of the story, which probably kept the company from being laughed at more than they already were. Zeus wrestled like four matches ever, most of which were short or tag matches so he wasn’t in the ring long. WCW, the geniuses that they are, brought him back seven years later and put him in the main event of another PPV.

Anyway back to the match. The Million Dollar Team won’t let them get inside until Jake fires in the snake to chase them all away. Hogan and Demolition are the champions that you would expect them to be at this point. Zeus wants to fight Hogan one on one but their respective partners hold them both back. Jake starts with Zeus but the actor wants Hogan. They stare each other down and Hogan bounces off Zeus. Hogan pounds away but nothing hurts Zeus at all.

Instead Hulk finds the one weak spot on Zeus by raking the eyes. He slams Zeus down and amazingly enough, IT DOESN’T REALLY DO MUCH. Barbarian hits Hogan in the back of the head and Zeus twists Hogan’s neck around. He starts choking away and it’s a DQ for Zeus who is only pulled off by DiBiase and the promise of money. Just to clarify, we’re giving the Hulkamaniacs, an 80s dream team, a man advantage. Also why would DiBiase get Zeus off Hogan? Wouldn’t Hogan’s pain and agony make DiBiase happy?

It’s DiBiase vs. Hogan now and Hulk is in big trouble. DiBiase hammers away in the corner but Hulk gets a boot up in the corner and there’s the tag to Jake. A clothesline puts DiBiase on the floor and it’s off to Ax who demolishes DiBiase with ease. Smash comes in and they both pound Ted down. Back to Hogan who triple teams DiBiase along with Demolition. Back to Ax with a clothesline but DiBiase elbows him down out of desperation.

Off to Warlord as these two teams are still feuding even a year later. Come to think of it there wasn’t much else in between for those guys either. Dang did the division fall that fast in just a year? A shoulder breaker puts Ax down but Barbarian misses a middle rope elbow. Off to Warlord again but he gets clotheslined down. Fuji trips Ax up and a basic elbow drop is enough to tie the score.

It’s Smash vs. Warlord now but it’s quickly off to Hogan. Hulk softens him up to bring in Jake, which Jesse calls a mismatch. That’s likely based on power but I’m pretty sure Jake is taller than Warlord. Off to Smash but Warlord pokes him in the eye to take over. Back to Barbarian whose big boot is caught but Smash misses the elbow. DiBiase comes back in with those falling punches of his which get two.

It’s chinlock time with a knee in Smash’s back. DiBiase misses a middle rope back elbow of all things but Smash won’t tag for some reason. Barbarian makes a blind tag so the hot shot Smash hits on DiBiase doesn’t count and Barbarian takes his head off with a top rope clothesline for the pin. Jake comes in next but he can’t DDT Barbarian. Barbie whips Jake into the corner with authority although I’m not sure who’s authority it was.

Back to Warlord as things slow down a lot due to exhaustion. Jake dives for a tag but DiBiase slaps Hogan to draw him in instead. DiBiase piledrives Jake but Roberts gets a foot on the ropes to Jesse’s annoyance. Barbarian misses a headbutt and there’s the hot tag to Barbarian. He cleans house and gets two on Barbarian off a big boot. A suplex gets the same and my goodness how rare is it to see Hogan get a two count? Hogan fights off both Powers of Pain but they catch him in a spike piledriver which is good for a DQ for both of them, making it Hogan/Roberts vs. DiBiase.

Dibiase drops knees on Hogan before slapping on the Million Dollar Dream. That eventually gets two arm drops and Jake makes the save. That’s actually a nice touch as it makes the hold look stronger by needing a save instead of Hogan saving himself. Hogan finally breaks the hold and punches a jumping DiBiase. Hot tag brings in the Snake who cleans house. Jake drives in knees on DiBiase’s head as Hogan is dying in the corner.

Here’s Virgil to interfere and take the DDT. DiBiase drops a fist on Jake and puts his feet on the ropes to steal the pin. Ted pounds on Hogan who is still reeling from the long Million Dollar Dream. I’ll give him credit as that’s some great selling of a hold like that. Off to a chinlock and Hogan taps, which wouldn’t mean a thing for years. Hogan breaks the hold but they clothesline each other. DiBiase belly to back suplexes him and it’s Hulk Up time. You know the rest and there’s the legdrop.

Rating: C. There’s one major problem with this match: the first four minutes of this match give away the ending almost immediately. How can you give Hogan, Roberts and Demolitio a man advantage that fast? I’m not saying Hogan should have lost, but the Zeus stuff could have come later in the match and worked much better. Have Zeus stand on the apron most of the match and it would have worked fine. The fans finally reacted though.

Savage and Zeus are ready for their tag team cage match on PPV two days after Christmas. More on that later.

Hogan and Brutus do the same. They’re facing Savage and Zeus in case that wasn’t clear. Sherri shows up and throws powder in their faces so that Savage and Zeus can jump them.

Jesse and Gorilla talk about the tag match and Jesse mentions that there’s trouble in the Heenan Family, which is code for Arn Anderson about to go back to the NWA and Tully got busted for cocaine.

The Rude Brood is ready for Roddy’s Rowdies. These promos are pretty much the same all around.

This one however isn’t. Roddy is talking to Gene when the Bushwhackers and Snuka come up and are all holding turkey legs. Roddy says after the match they can have lunch. Then they all scream about breaking big bones.

Rude Brood vs. Roddy’s Rowdies

Rick Rude, Fabulous Rougeau Brothers, Mr. Perfect

Roddy Piper, Bushwhackers, Jimmy Snuka

If nothing else we get to hear All American Boys, perhaps the best theme song in wrestling history. There’s no Heenan with Rude, which is part of the issues the Family is having. Luke and Perfect get things going but after a single slam it’s off to Butch who bites on Perfect’s thigh. Luke comes in and does the same and Snuka matches suit. Butch bites as well and it’s off to Snuka.

Jacques comes in as well and they stall a lot. Jacques poses a lot so Snuka headbutts him down and follows up with a big chop. A slam puts Jacques down and it’s a Superfly Splash for a quick elimination. Rude comes in next and swivels his hips, only to get headbutted into a tag from Perfect. Rude accidentally low bridges Perfect so Snuka rams them together and the Brood is in trouble.

Off to Piper vs. Perfect and the Brood’s luck continues to go bad. Luke comes in and drops a knee before it’s off to Snuka for more shots to the head. Back to Luke for more biting and Butch beats on him a bit more. Piper comes in to face Raymond and for some reason Rougeau tries to slug it out with Piper. A superkick puts Piper down for two but he piledrives Raymond for the easy pin and it’s 4-2.

Perfect comes in with his neck snap for two and for the first time, Piper’s team is in trouble. Piper comes back with a slingshot to send Perfect into the post. Butch comes in for some basic stuff but it’s quickly back to Luke. Piper comes back in for some rapid fire punches and Perfect is in trouble. Back to Butch for more biting but he poses too long and Perfect rolls him up for the elimination.

Piper tries to steal a pin on a rollup to Perfect but it only gets two. Off to Snuka before Luke headbutts Perfect in the stomach. Rude makes a blind tag but jumps into a punch to the gut. Luke ducks his head and the Rude Awakening ties us up at two each. It’s Piper/Snuka vs. Rude/Perfect which is a heck of a midcard tag match.

Rude vs. Snuka starts the final four off and Rude swivels a bit more. Perfect comes in and taunts Piper, drawing him in so Snuka can get double teamed. Snuka finally gets in a shot to break Perfect’s momentum but Rude gets the tag before Piper can come in. Snuka grabs a quick small package for two before taking Perfect down with a flying headbutt. They hit head to head and both guys go down, followed by a double tag.

We finally get Piper vs. Rude which is what this whole match is based on. Piper easily wins a slugout and backdrops Rude down. They fight to the floor and it’s a double countout, getting us down to Snuka vs. Perfect. Perfect hits a great looking dropkick to put Snuka on the floor which eventually gets two. Snuka gets in a chop in the corner and a cross body for two. The Perfectplex out of nowhere gives Perfect the win.

Rating: C-. They did the right thing by having the tag teams get knocked out quick because they didn’t mean anything in this at all. Other than that though there was nothing of note here. Piper and Rude were both counted out to make sure they stayed strong and Snuka didn’t mean anything at this point. Nothing to see here but it wasn’t bad or anything.

The Rude Brood celebrates and Rude says don’t worry about Heenan being gone.

The Ultimate Warriors are very fired (and likely coked) up. Warrior’s topic of the night: orga donor cards.

Ultimate Warriors vs. Heenan Family

Ultimate Warrior, Jim Neidhart, Rockers

Andre the Giant, Arn Anderson, Haku, Bobby Heenan

Andre can barely move and it’s sad to see. Neidhart and the Rockers start before anything happens and Jim is in trouble early. Here’s Warrior without any music (he’s IC Champion here) and a big clothesline puts Andre on the floor, which draws a countout because when the bell rang, Andre was the only Heenan Family member in the ring. We’ve already got the same problem the Hogan match had.

Warrior and Haku get things started for all intents and purposes but it’s quickly off to Anvil vs. Arn. Andre (in blue instead of black) yells incoherently at the Warrior as he leaves. It’s Haku vs. Anvil now with Haku in control. A superkick puts Neidhart down and eliminates him like it’s a squash match. Off to Shawn to make Haku miss him and now it’s off to Jannetty.

Haku tries a double clothesline but only hits Shawn. He picks up Marty but Shawn dropkicks Marty down onto Haku for a near fall. Off to Arn who tries a double suplex with Haku on Jannetty, but Shawn catches his partner in a nice move. Double superkicks put the wrestlers on the other team down and it’s off to Marty vs. Haku. Warrior gets a tag in a few seconds later and Haku immediately goes for the eyes.

Haku backs Warrior into the corner and Heenan points to Arn for the tag in a funny bit. Arn immediately gets taken down and Marty hooks an armbar. Anderson brings Marty to the corner and brings in Heenan for a single punch before it’s back to Haku. Arn knees Marty in the back and Haku superkicks him down so Heenan can drop a knee on Jannetty for the pin. You could loudly hear them calling spots on that sequence for some reason.

Warrior comes in so here’s Anderson again. There’s a bearhug by the Champ and Haku gets one as well. Off to Shawn who gets knocked to the floor with a few shots. Shawn moonsaults out of the corner over Arn and Anderson is in trouble. Warrior and Michaels both punch Anderson at the same time and Arn backs away from Warrior. A splash from Shawn gets two and it’s off to Haku.

That doesn’t last long at all as a cross body eliminates Haku to get us down to Warrior/Shawn vs. Heenan/Anderson. Heenan tries to get in some cheap shots on Shawn which draws in Warrior. Why? Was he that afraid for Shawn’s safety? Arn dumps Shawn to the floor and Heenan goes up….and then regains his sanity and climbs back down. Arn keeps asking for help from Heenan because he’s getting tired so it’s finally back to Bobby who runs at the first sign of trouble.

Shawn rams his head into the back of Arn’s head and both guys are down. They slug it out but Shawn walks into the spinebuster (called the Anderson Drop) for the elimination. Warrior fires off some shoulders but Arn ducks and sends him to the floor. Heenan goes up again but thinks better of it again. Off to Heenan but Warrior quickly Hulks up so we see some more Anderson. Warrior fights him off as well and whips Arn into Heenan to knock Bobby to the floor. The gorilla press and splash get us down to one on one. Warrior sneaks up on Heenan and what do you think happens here? A shoulder block and splash ends this.

Rating: C-. I think it was watching the whole show before this but this was another dull match. Warrior was never in any danger and I think everyone knew it. To be fair, this would have been better with Tully out there and you can’t fault the guys for that. Heenan being in there had to turn it into a comedy match and I can’t hold that against them. Still though, another dull match in a series of them tonight.

Warrior sprints up the aisle and clotheslines Heenan as he leaves to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. There are multiple problems associated with this show. First of all, nothing here is what you would call good. The matches are all ok at best and nothing beyond that. I guess the best match would be the opener, but even that was just ok. This was a really weak time in the company as they had Hogan but he had beaten everyone already so there’s nothing for him to do really.

However there’s a bigger problem with Survivor Series overall. In short, what’s the point of any of this stuff? No stories are advanced here, other than the first match there was no clean fall between the people the feuding people, and there’s nothing to build off here. Look at Hogan. If you have Hogan lose in that match with DiBiase putting him to sleep after that much of a beating, you have a new opponent for him.

Instead, we have Hogan standing tall again which is nothing new at all. That’s the problem with the first few shows other than the first one. Survivor Series went nowhere and the appeal died very quickly. That wouldn’t change until 1991 so 1990 was somehow even more boring to sit through.

Wait I’m not done.

So as I mentioned, there was another match talked about inside a cage between Hogan/Beefcake and Zeus/Savage. This was a dark match at a TV taping in I believe Nashville. It was released as a PPV special called No Holds Barred: The Movie and The Match. Let’s get to it.

Hulk Hogan/Brutus Beefcake vs. Zeus/Randy Savage

This is one of like three matches Zeus ever had. Both guys have to escape to win. Vince and Jesse are on commentary. Beefcake gets in first but Sherri slams the door on Hogan to keep him out of the cage. Savage chokes Hogan through the cage as Zeus destroys Beefcake. Sherri locks the cage as Hulk punches Savage through the bars. The crowd is on fire for this. Hogan comes in over the top and makes the save as it’s time for the big showdown with Zeus.

Hogan slams Zeus into the cage a few times and down goes the monster. Savage gets whipped HARD into the cage by Brutus and both heels eat Hogan boots in the corner. Zeus gets double teamed but he sends both Hogan and Beefcake into the cage to take over. Savage tries to climb out but Beefcake stops him. Sherri tries to help Savage but Beefcake rams their heads together to keep Savage in the match.

Savage and Zeus ram both guys into the cage over and over which is a very basic yet very smart strategy for a match like this. Beefcake comes back and rams Zeus and Savage into the cage and all four guys are down. The referee unlocks the door to see what he should do, but Sherri rams the cage onto Hebner’s head and slides Savage the cage.

We load up the big spot of the match as Savage climbs the cage. Vince is freaking out. Jesse: “Well who’s going to stop it McMahon? You can’t do nothing about it.” Savage goes up to the top of the cage and wraps the chain around his hand. He dives at Beefcake but Brutus hits him in the ribs on the way down.

Beefcake gets the chain and pounds on Savage as Hogan can’t slam Zeus. Savage and Beefcake climb at the same time and it’s Hulk Up time. Beefcake gets over the top as Savage goes through the door and it’s one on one. Hogan slams Zeus, rams him into the cage about four times, slams him again, drops an insane THREE LEGS and Zeus is DEAD. The pin is academic.

Rating: B. That’s likely high, but this was absolutely perfect for what it was supposed to be. This was a TV taping main event and the fans got to see Hogan DESTROY his biggest rival at the time. The match was a ton of fun with Hogan in his late 80s goodness. Hogan vs. Zeus was actually going to be the Mania 6 main event for awhile until Vince woke up and put Warrior in there instead.

Ratings Comparison:

Dream Team vs. Enforcers

Original: B-

Redo: C+

King’s Court vs. 4x4s

Original: B+

Redo: D+

Hulkamaniacs vs. Million Dollar Team

Original: D-

Redo: C

Rude Brood vs. Roddy’s Rowdies

Original: D

Redo: C-

Ultimate Warriors vs. Heenan Family

Original: C+

Redo: C-

Overall Rating

Original: D+

Redo: D

Bonus Match

Original: B-

Redo: B

I think the difference here is that with the original I didn’t like it at all but with the new one I got bored by it because it just keeps going and going.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/11/08/history-of-survivor-series-count-up-1989-includes-a-bonus-review/

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WWF Wrestling Challenge
Date: February 7, 1988
Location: Wicomico Youth and Civic Center, Salisbury, Maryland
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Bobby Heenan

What a name for a venue. We’re past the Rumble and the Main Event, but only the Rumble had aired when this show was taped. We won’t be into a post Main Event set of tapings until the end of the month so for now all you’re going to hear about is the Rumble (in theory). We’re getting into some very interesting times now though so let’s get to it.

We hear from the arena manager who welcomes us to the arena.

Vince says that the announcers aren’t allowed to talk about the ending of The Main Event. That’s pretty clever actually.

Opening sequence.

Ultimate Warrior vs. Hercules

Hercules gets fired up before the match. Heenan is at ringside for this so Vince is alone on commentary. It’s a pre-match posedown because the chain is still in the ring. We’re going to get a tug of war to start. There’s been no contact yet. They keep moving their hands closer and Herc kicks him in the ribs. They keep pulling on the chain and it breaks in half. Herc hits him with half of the chain and the thing is thrown out before it officially starts.

Herc has to be pulled off of Warrior allowing the painted one to come back and choke Hercules to the back. This would result in a Wrestlemania rematch.

Mania is officially announced for Atlantic City at 4pm. We hear about some people who are going to be in the city although not exactly at the show.

Jerry Gray/Rex King vs. The Bolsheviks

Slick is with the Russians here. Heenan is back on commentary here. After the Russian anthem Nikolai goes after Gray. Heenan wants to talk about Indianapolis but he’s not allowed to. Off to Boris who gets pounded in the corner which gets him sent to the floor. Nikolai and King come in and Boris hits King in the back of the head. A double ax to the chest gets the pin. Squash.

Demolition says that Billy Jack Haynes and Ken Patera can’t stop them. They want whoever they can get their hands on, but they especially want the new champions, Strike Force.

Bad News is back next week.

Gino Carabella/Brian Costello vs Young Stallions

Roma and I think Costello start things off. Powers comes in with a sunset flip and it’s back to Roma. Heenan talks about hanging out with Donald Trump. The jobbers double team Roma but the Stallions make a blind tag. Roma (I think the illegal man) pins Costello with a belly to belly suplex.

Slick and the One Man Gang say that the Gang will win the world title this coming year.

The Bulldogs say thank you for your get well wishes to Matilda.

Rick Rude vs. Brady Boone

These two went to high school together actually. Boone jumps over Rude in the corner and does it again. His momentum is short lived as he walks into a powerslam for two. Rude Awakening ends this quick.

Jim Duggan talks about winning the Rumble. He’s always got the board in case he needs it.

Butch Reed vs. Dave Stoudemire

Heenan comes back into the booth and talks about The Main Event but it’s censored. There’s nothing to say here. It runs about two and a half minutes and Reed wins with a top rope shoulder block.

We get clips from the Rumble with Dino Bravo trying for a world bench press record. They only show about two minutes here but the whole thing ran about twenty and ended with Jesse helping.

We also get a clip of the end of the Women’s Tag Title match.

Demolition vs. Rick Hunter/Omar Atlas

Atlas starts and gets beaten down very quickly. Off to Hunter who is taken down even faster. Hunter gets demolished and the Decapitator ends this quick.

Ron Bass thinks all the top talent is hiding from him.

Heenan gets censored again and Vince leans his head in front of Bobby’s mouth so no one can read his lip. That’s a pretty good idea.

Overall Rating: C. The show was just ok but the story was clearly coming strong here and it would only be a matter of time before the whole thing finally got to be talked about. Once that happens, the road to Mania will begin and we’re only about seven weeks away from that show anyway. The wrestling wasn’t great here, but the story was.

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WWF Wrestling Challenge
Date: January 17, 1988
Location: Municipal Auditorium, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

Back to the early 1988 B shows from the boys up north. We’re still getting close to the Rumble which probably won’t be mentioned more than in passing. Expect some more talk about the upcoming Hogan vs. Andre II match, assuming that’s been advertised already. This is going to be very similar to the Superstars shows that I’ve already done so I’ll know a lot of it before I watch it. Let’s get to it.

We get a message from Bill Boner, the mayor of Nashville, welcoming us to the city.

Gorilla and Bobby are hosts. Gorilla: “Gorilla Monsoon here with this miserable individual.” He’s coming out swinging this week.

They run down the card and Duggan is called a policeman. I haven’t heard that one before.

Jake Roberts vs. Gino Carabello

Gino can barely make it onto the bottom rope to hold his arms up. Gino gets in a single shot before Jake knees him in the ribs to take over. Jake grabs the arm as the fans chant for the DDT. Short clothesline and a slam set up the DDT for the quick squash win.

Gino gets the snake treatment.

Dino Bravo is going to attempt to break a world bench press record at the Rumble and he speaks French about that for a bit.

Jimmy Hart’s Glamor Girls defend the Women’s Tag Titles against the Jumping Bomb Angels. Look those challengers up if you want to see some cool women wrestlers. They get a quick word in Japanese here.

Demolition vs. Omar Atlas/Rex King

Ax and let’s say King start us off and it’s time to pound on the back. Smash comes in for some slams and throws King to the outside. Ax slams him on the concrete and it’s time for more pain. A HARD chop puts King in the ropes and it’s off to Omar. He gets smashed (see? The name makes sense) down as Gorilla and Heenan have some funny exchanges about Heenan’s standing in the company. Fuji says that’s enough and the Decapitator ends Omar.

Rating: D. This wasn’t much other than a long squash, but the tag matches were almost always longer. Demolition was straight up awesome and they dominated for so long that there was no one capable of hanging with them. The match was boring but at least the music was cool.

Gene keeps telling us about the Rumble Royal coming up next Sunday in Ontario. Ron Bass likes his chances and explains the rules one more time.

Bad News Brown is coming.

Jim Duggan vs. Joe Mirto

Harley Race says he’s the real king. Heenan bails to go take care of something else as Duggan pounds away. Mirto is a big guy too so this is even more impressive. Three Point Clothesline ends this.

Van Van Horne vs. Rick Rude

Gorilla thinks Rude vs. Warrior would be a classic. Well I wouldn’t say classic but it was certainly good so chalk up most of one for Monsoon. Rude offers a free shot at the ribs which does nothing of course so he snap suplexes Van Horne after shrugging it off. Rude keeps beating him down but Heenan won’t let him end it. Oh ok now he can so Rude hits a NICE dropkick. I’ve never seen him do that before but it worked perfectly. Rude Awakening ends this.

More Rumble stuff. The Gang and Reed aren’t wanting to go to Canada but they’ll go for the money.

Young Stallions vs. Los Conquistadors

Powers starts with let’s say #1 and armdrags him down. Off to #2 who gets caught as well. The Stallions double team #2 as Heenan is back with facts about Los Conquistadors. They’re from South America and one of them is not named Raoul. One of them, the one we’ll presume isn’t named Raoul, comes off the top with a shot to the back of Powers and more double teaming commences. #1 misses a dive off the top and it’s off to Roma. No one in the crowd seems to care as Powers hits a powerslam on #2 for the pin.

Rating: C-. Not the worst match in the world but the Stallions weren’t interesting at all. They were both your run of the mill muscle guys that were nothing different than any other guys with their builds would have been. There’s just nothing there and that’s why no one cared about them. Even in a less crowded tag team scene they wouldn’t have meant anything.

We get our “live” interview segment with Andre and DiBiase. They talk about the Main Event and Andre says he’ll win the title for DiBiase.

Ultimate Warrior vs. Brian Costello

Warrior immediately clotheslines him over the top to the floor before suplexing him back in. Someone gives Heenan an envelope. Gorilla press and splash get the pin.

Bolsheviks/Butch Reed/One Man Gang vs. Killer Bees/Lanny Poffo/Rick Hunter

This is the closest thing you’ll get to a big match on this show for all intents and purposes. The Bees break up the Soviet anthem and we start with Blair vs. Boris. Off to Brunzell quickly as Heenan shows Gorilla a letter from Tunney reinstating the Islanders. O’Connor Roll gets two on Nikolai, who locks in a bearhug on Brunzell. Reed comes in and runs over Lanny with an elbow and Hunter comes in. Reed runs him over and the Gang hits whatever he called the gordbuster for the pin. Not enough to rate but it was a squash.

Beefcake has his own small bullhorns which he’ll give to the fans to counteract the Megaphone. Then it’ll be him vs. Valentine, which is what he wants.

Gorilla and Bobby wrap it up.

Overall Rating: D+. Nothing of note here but it wasn’t bad. The idea was to talk about the Main Event and it’s pretty clear that no one intended the Rumble to be a major event. I’m more curious about what they’re doing with the name, as it was Rumble Royal a week before the show but the Royal Rumble when it aired. Anyway, pretty weak show, but things would pick up soon.

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WWF Wrestling Challenge
Date: January 10, 1988
Location: Civic Center, Fort Meyers, Florida
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

Hopefully this week is a normal episode in this series. From what I can tell this is a series of squashes plus some highlights from a SNME match with Bundy and Hogan which is really there for the post match stuff. Other than that there’s not much going on as the stuff for Mania wouldn’t get rolling until February. Let’s get to it.

British Bulldogs vs. Steve Lombardi/Terry Gibbs

Gibbs and Smith start things off as Heenan is saying the Islanders are innocent in the Matilda theft. Off to Lombardi and the Kid. There’s the snap suplex and it’s off to Gibbs. We get an inset interview from the Islanders with an empty leash which apparently explains that they don’t have Matilda. Lombadri gets in some offense on Dynamite but a clothesline puts Steve down. Back to Smith for some suplexes. Powerslam puts him down but Gibbs saves. The gorilla press headbutt combo ends this.

Rating: D+. Just a squash here but the Bulldogs continue to be awesome. It was a backdrop for the feud with the Islanders which is fine. Heenan’s crazy laughter is pretty creepy in its own right. Nothing to see here as a match but the Bulldogs were totally awesome and made up for the squash aspects of the match.

We get a clip of Matilda being dognapped which is a couple of minutes long. Basically there was a Bulldogs vs. Islanders match and Matilda went after Heenan. The Islanders got knocked to the floor so they stole Matilda.

Jack Tunney says that until Matilda is back, the Islanders are suspended without pay.

Ron Bass vs. Omar Atlas

Atlas tries to use speed which works for about thirty seconds. Heenan spends the match ranting about Tunney and the banning. Bass gives a quick inset interview about how tough he is. A modified Pedigree (no arm trap) gets the pin easily for Bass.

Dino Bravo has a new manager: Frenchy Martin. Bravo says he’ll be coming after Hogan and the title this year.

Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Dusty Wolfe

No name for the jobber here. Total dominance by Bigelow who shows off with some nice jumping stuff. Bigelow misses a charge in the corner and Gorilla names the jobber: Dusty Wolfe. Bigelow brushes off the offense and hits a suplex followed by a slingshot splash to literally squash Wolfe.

We go to Gene for an explanation about the Rumble Royal. Yes that’s what he said. He explains the concept and brings in the Killer Bees who are excited to be in it.

Danny Davis/Hart Foundation vs. Doug Wellington/???/???

Davis starts with let’s say Wellington. Clothesline gets two for Wellington and it’s off to Jobber #1. Bret comes in to run him over and drop an elbow before bringing in Neidhart. Here’s Jobber #2 and I don’t think Gorilla knows their names either. Hart Attack and we’re done quick.

Here are the highlights from Hogan vs. Bundy which runs like 10 seconds and is Hogan whipping Bundy into the corner and dropping the leg for the pin. Post match Andre comes in and chokes him out. The British Bulldogs come in but can’t do a thing. An army of guys come in and Duggan hits Andre with the 2×4 to break it up.

We go to DiBiase and Virgil who bring out Andre and Heenan as his latest purchase. This was a common thing back in the day: this promo aired “in the arena” on both Superstars and Wrestling Challenge. It’s the same thing and it ends with Andre saying he’ll get the belt for DiBiase.

Jerry Gray vs. Sam Houston

This is actually joined in progress for some reason. There’s nothing to see here. Gray hammers on him for a bit, Houston hammers back, a back elbow puts Jerry down and the bulldog wins it.

Greg Valentine vs. Pete Sanchez

Total domination with a lot of slams from Valentine. He sends Sanchez to the floor and puts him down inside with a belly to back. Elbow drop and figure four end this quickly.

Koko B. Ware vs. Rick Renslow

Renslow is a very hairy man. He jumps Koko to start but gets knocked down with a variety of dropkicks. Ghostbuster (brainbuster) ends this. It was barely a minute long.

Steamboat is looking forward to a good year in 1988. He has another mouth to feed now because he has a son. Steamboat wants the IC Title back and he wouldn’t mind getting his hands on Rick Rude either.

Gorilla gives us a preview of next week and we’re out.

Overall Rating: D. I really wasn’t that into this one. The longest match was about three minutes long and the matches were somehow more boring than on Superstars. It’s not terrible I guess but it’s nothing that you’re going to want to watch on a regular basis. Naturally that’s what I’ll be doing, but I have an unhealthy obsession with this time period in WWF history. Bad show, but it was about what you would expect on this show.

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Superstars of Wrestling
Date: January 23, 1988
Location: Von Braun Civic Center, Huntsville, Alabama
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jesse Ventura, Bruno Sammartino

Smackdown is still loading and probably will be for awhile so let’s take a look at the show the day before the inaugural Royal Rumble. I’d be shocked if that show is actually discussed though, as this show was likely taped weeks in advance. Also we’re getting closer and closer to the Hogan title loss which should be interesting. Let’s get to it.

Usual intro.

Randy Savage vs. Barry Horowitz

Vince goes into his usual I LOVE LIZ stuff. Given his well known female exploits, thank goodness this is when Vince was just a commentator. Savage hits the ax from the top both inside the ring and out to the floor. Peggy Sue (Sherri as Honky’s girl) says stay away from her man. Knee drop gets two. The big elbow ends this.

Update on Matilda who is back. The Islanders are reinstated but everyone hates them now. We get some clips of the announcement that Matilda is back. The Islanders and Heenan aren’t worried about Matilda’s condition. The Bulldogs say Matilda is in bad shape and won’t eat, meaning she’s lost a lot of weight.

Ricky Hunter/W.D. Wellington vs. Butch Reed/One Man Gang

Vince talks about an address that you can send get well cards to Matilda at. Vince: “I’m sure the British Bulldogs read the cards to Matilda.” Jesse: “I’d bet she has to read them to the Bulldogs.” Muraco wants the Gang and Reed. Reed runs over Hunter to start and it’s off to Gang for some pounding. An elbow nearly kills Hunter so it’s off to Wellington. Back to Reed who uses Nikolai’s gorilla press into a backbreaker. Gang hits a gordbuster for the pin. Total domination.

We talk about a New Haven show with a cage match. It’ll be a six man tag in there. We hear about the rest of the card and Jimmy Hart comes in to talk about the six man tag (Savage/Strike Force vs. Honky/Harts).

Joe Mirto/Iron Mike Sharpe vs. Ken Patrea/Billy Jack Haynes

Haynes and Sharpe start us off and Sharpe gets in some offense. Off to Patera vs. Mirto and we hear from Demolition, who is having a small feud with Haynes and Patera. Jesse talks about Hogan vs. Andre II on February 5. Kind of strange that we hear about that but not the Rumble. A quick full nelson to Mirto gets the submission for Haynes.

More house show stuff, this time with Bravo and Frenchy Martin saying they’re ready for Hillbilly Jim. Rude comes in and says he’s beat Koko B. Ware.

Hart Foundation/Danny Davis vs. Rex King/Van Van Horne/Sam Houston

Houston and Davis start us off and Davis is in trouble early. Off to Horne and then King, who is taken down by Davis. What does it mean when Danny Davis is beating you up? Anvil comes in and the power moves begin. Bret does a few things and it’s back to Davis. Houston makes a small comeback but Bret trips him up. The Hart Attack kills Houston and Davis gets the easy pin. This was nothing, although Jesse called referee Joey Marella she for some reason.

We get a clip of Greg Valentine attacking Koko after beating him until Beefcake made the save. Jimmy got a haircut with the big hedge clippers.

Andre and DiBiase are in the arena to talk about February 5. DiBiase says he warned everyone that he would find a way to buy the world title and Andre is that way. Andre says he’ll break Hogan apart and choke him down. DiBiase says the fans won’t mean anything to Hulk then. Maniacal laugh, maniacal laugh, maniacal laugh.

Jim Duggan vs. Steve Lombardi

Duggan pounds on him and Lombardi’s shots to the head do nothing. Duggan has a hard head and is stupid you see. A kneedrop and slam set up the three point clothesline for the pin.

Bad News Brown says he’s the only news.

Harley Race/Hercules/Rick Rude vs. Jerry Allen/Lanny Poffo/Scott Casey

Poffo does a quick poem about the Slammys. Casey and Herc start but it’s quickly off to Rude. Ok make that Race. Everyone on the jobber team gets beaten up by all of the Heenan team. Hercules racks Allen for the tap out. Total squash.

Savage and Strike Force say they’re ready for the cage match.

Vince previews next week’s show to end this.

Overall Rating: D+. Pretty boring show this week but again they’re like 40 minutes long so they’re easy to do. We’re on the verge of hitting it huge with these angles too so it’s worth sitting through this part to get to the big stuff. Ton of squashes here as you would expect, but the talk of Hogan vs. Andre makes me drool.

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