New Column: For Whom The Bell Tolls 25 Times
http://www.wrestlingrumors.net/kbs-review-for-whom-the-bell-tolls-25-times/45760/
I had to talk about Undertaker at some point.
http://www.wrestlingrumors.net/kbs-review-for-whom-the-bell-tolls-25-times/45760/
I had to talk about Undertaker at some point.
http://411mania.com/wrestling/wwe-raw-rating-tanks-to-new-low/
This is a combination of more than one thing.First and foremost, the NFL is killing WWE. I don’t think that’s a bit secret at this point.
Second, the fans seem tired of the same matches over and over. Last night’s main event was Rusev vs. Reigns. That was a cool showdown in the battle royal last year but now, who in the world thinks Rusev is going to beat him? It’s a boring match that is just set up as part of a much longer story. In other words, don’t bother watching now because it’s going to be at least January before something interesting happens.
Third, the fans have gotten so used to having no one to cheer for that seeing ANOTHER heel champion is burning them out. Reigns held the title for five minutes. Unless you count Brock, who was still officially a heel, we haven’t had a face champion since Summerslam 2014. That’s getting into TNA territory. At some point, you have to give the people something to celebrate or they’re going to give up.
Fourth, the injuries are taking a big toll. All those people being gone leaves a BIG chunk of the show needing to be filled in and it’s really hurting things. Without Cena, Orton and Rollins (not to mention the part timers), there’s a lot of time to be filled. Last night we had the New Day doing a (funny) segment that went nowhere and Ryback beating up Heath Slater in another “country music is stupid” segment. Couple that with a nothing Mark Henry vs. Neville match and some midcard tag matches and there was nothing interesting to watch.
Finally, Sheamus is the World Champion. Now Sheamus is a cool guy and capable of doing some good stuff in the ring (see the Big Show matches which gave Big Show his best performances in years), but coming into the title win, he had won one singles match since September. I know WWE disagrees, but fans remember that. They see a guy who stole the title and is likely holding it for a long time. So we have a loser fighting a choker for the title while the Authority sits back and laughs. How is that supposed to be entertaining?
At the end of the day, WWE needs to freshen things up a bit. Aside from major changes like the show running long etc., they need something fresh. I don’t mean giving the Authority new toys to play with. I mean a new idea. The Divas closing the show last week drew the best ratings in weeks. Now the show shouldn’t be about the Divas, but the key thing as that felt fresh. It wasn’t another tag match or another two upper midcard guys fighting on Monday night Maggle.
Freshen things up, get rid of Sheamus, stop having champions lose and BUILD UP SOMETHING FOR NEXT WEEK! That still drives me nuts. Why in the world can they never have a match built up for the following week unless it’s a tournament? “Next week, Dean Ambrose gets his shot at the Intercontinental Title! Ambrose beat Owens at Survivor Series and now he wants the gold! Tune in next Monday!” Maybe that can open the show instead of Stephanie strutting down to the ring and then yelling at someone for fifteen minutes. I don’t know about you, but nothing gets me fired up more than TALKING!
But yeah, these numbers aren’t surprising given how little effort they’re putting in right now.
http://411mania.com/wrestling/solomon-crowe-removed-from-wwes-website/
I can’t say I blame them. Crowe had potential but he never really clicked. That’s definitely not to say he doesn’t have talent, but the little monster gimmick was never going to work. I was really intrigued by the hacker gimmick though and was hoping it was going to go somewhere. Unfortunately HHH allegedly didn’t like the idea, which is a shame because the clips i saw of it had potential.
Monday Night Raw
Date: November 23, 2015
Location: Bridgestone Arena, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Byron Saxton
The end of the year is almost upon us and we’re in another Sheamus era. It seems that they’re heading towards Roman Reigns playing Daniel Bryan this year because that’s totally the same thing. There isn’t much else coming out of Survivor Series but we could be in for a few very long months. Let’s get to it.
We open with a recap of the World Title scene from last night.
Here’s the Authority to open things up with Stephanie strutting down the ramp. Stephanie talks about opportunity striking very rarely and HHH brings up Reigns being stupid with his decision two weeks ago. Here’s someone who seized opportunity when he had the chance: the new WWE World Champion Sheamus. The fans still say Sheamus looks stupid but there’s nothing that is ruining his moment.
Last night he kicked Roman off his mountain because just as he promised, he was one Brogue Kick away. Sheamus holds up the title and asks who looks stupid now. Cue Reigns to say he wants his rematch and the fans chant YES. Stephanie is of course right there to make fun of the fans because she needs their balls for her collection.
There’s no rematch tonight as Stephanie shouts at Roman to get out of her ring. Roman asks if HHH is hiding behind his wife so we get another staredown. HHH says no rematch tonight and leaves. Cue the returning Rusev to superkick Reigns down, followed by a Brogue Kick from Sheamus. Oh yeah he’s the new Bryan. Well at least in WWE’s minds. Everyone leaves and HHH makes Sheamus vs. Reigns in a TLC match at the pay per view. Stephanie adds Rusev vs. Reigns tonight.
Recap of Undertaker and Kane squashing the Wyatts last night.
Dudley Boyz vs. Luke Harper/Bray Wyatt
Harper chops Bubba in the corner to start as the Wyatts are looking more aggressive tonight. Bubba kicks Harper in the face and it’s off to D-Von for the reverse 3D. Bray saves his buddy from the regular version and we take an early break. Back with Bray chinlocking D-Von before switching things up with a nerve hold. D-Von fights up and makes the hot tag as everything breaks down. In the melee, Harper’s discus lariat puts Bubba away at 7:53.
Rating: D+. Barely enough to rate here because of the big commercial break right in the middle. It’s good to see the Wyatts win again, but does anyone believe that they’re going to do anything after this? They’re the biggest chokers in the company and it’s getting harder and harder to buy them as contenders to anything. On the other hand, it’s cool to see the Dudleys out there putting people over like they should be doing.
Post match Rowan and Strowman come in to continue the beatdown.
Video on Undertaker’s career, the same from last night.
Sasha Banks vs. Becky Lynch
This starts after a commercial, the fourth in forty five minutes. Sasha takes over to start and chokes Becky on the ropes as we hear about the Irish dominance of WWE at the moment. Tamina gets in a cheap shot to give Sasha two and we hit the bow and arrow. Back up and Becky grabs a t-bone followed by the Disarm-Her but Tamina’s distraction lets Naomi pull her under the ropes. A quick rollup with trunks gives Sasha the pin at 4:08.
Rating: D+. This is every problem the Divas have had in the last year: no characters, no personalities, no reason to care and no time for the match. The team thing is still annoying and it’s one of the same ideas that the heels have used for the better part of ever in this company. These two can have matches but only Nikki Bella is allowed to have a personality around here.
Cole says Sasha might be in the running for #1 contender but Paige cuts him off and shows a clip of Charlotte’s arm being under the rope in the Figure Eight last night. Charlotte is just a dirty cheater like her old man and Paige is going to prove it tonight.
Here’s the New Day for a country music jamboree to celebrate their first anniversary as a team and to issue an open challenge. They come out on pink stick unicorns with Big E. wearing a cowboy hat. This is already funny by definition but JBL singing the Rawhide theme hurts it a bit. Big E.: “YIPPIE KAY AY MOTHER…..” Kingston: “Shut your mouth!”
They can’t bring themselves to say that they’re in the capital of country music so they make fun of the genres tropes of losing your girlfriend, your truck breaking down and your dog running away. Big E. goes on a rant about tractor songs and says that’s enough country music for a lifetime. Kofi, with a braided horn on his head, sums it up by saying this is the truth and it’s not even coming from his character: country music SUCKS.
The open challenge is on and we’ve got some challengers in the form of the Lucha Dragons. Actually wait as the New Day goes to leave but get cut off by the Usos. Woods: “BAD JIMMY! BAD JEY!” Big E: “SIT! STAY!” The open challenge was just a figure of speech according to Kofi but Cara says let’s make it a triple threat. New Day doesn’t like this spotlight stealing and says no title match because the challenge is canceled. The Dragons and the Usos attack anyway and the champions are cleared out.
Charlotte is ready to defend her title against Paige in a rematch tonight.
Mark Henry vs. Neville
Henry throws him into the corner to start and Mark gets annoyed at Neville for fighting back. A BIG throw sends Neville outside and Henry looks conflicted. Back in and Neville escapes the World’s Strongest Slam before kicking Henry in the head. For some reason we cut to Miz in the back before the Red Arrow pins Henry at 2:22, even though he looked like he kicked out at two.
Henry shakes his hand post match and tells Neville he’s going to be good.
Stardust is raving about Cesaro and Goldust when Titus O’Neil comes in. They talk about science and Titus barks at him. That’s your random segment of the week.
Stardust/Ascension vs. Goldust/Prime Time Players
Byron on Stardust and the Ascension: “They look like they had a big gulp of evil.” The Dusts start things off but it’s off to Konnor before any contact, just like last night. Viktor comes in before any contact as well so Goldust armdrags him down. Darren comes in to stay on the arm before Titus suplexes him onto Viktor as normal.
A belly to belly gets two for Darren and it’s off to Stardust who eats a discus forearm. Viktor comes in off a blind tag to take over and I don’t remember the last time a crowd was this silent. Stardust charges into a boot in the corner and the hot tag brings in Titus. Everything breaks down with Goldust clotheslining his brother to the floor, leaving Titus to hit the Clash on Konnor for the pin at 6:30.
Rating: D. The action wasn’t that bad but there was nothing to care about here and the crowd made that clear. It picked up a bit at the end but there’s only so much I can get out of watching Darren get beaten up for a few minutes. It doesn’t help that neither regular team is going anywhere and Goldust vs. Stardust wasn’t any good.
The winners dance after the match.
Here are Zeb Colter and Alberto Del Rio for the state of the MexAmerican union. MexAmerica was supposed to be a perfect nation but the early growing pains have been turned into fuel for all the haters on social media. Del Rio talks about everyone wanting to see something great but not being entertained enough. Therefore, the borders of MexAmerica are closed forever.
Cue Jack Swagger because he hasn’t lost to anyone recently enough. How many people are there that could stand up for America or just call Colter and Del Rio out for being stupid to get a rub? No instead here’s good old Jack Swagger to get built up and then lose the big match AGAIN because we haven’t done that recently enough. Swagger says Colter used to stand for something but now he’s just complaining all the time. Jack comes to the ring but Del Rio holds up the title and backs off. Swagger does WE THE PEOPLE as they leave.
Divas Title: Charlotte vs. Paige
Charlotte is defending after beating Paige last night. After some big match intros they fight over a lockup, already showing more intensity than they had last night. They slap each other rather hard before Charlotte throws her face first onto the mat. A Fujiwara armbar sends Paige to the ropes and she yells at the fans to blow off some steam. Some knees to the chest get two for the champ and she puts on the figure four neck lock for those flipping slams.
Paige pulls her out of the corner for a crash and puts on a chinlock. That goes as far as a chinlock is going to go so Paige puts on her own figure four neck lock. A low superkick gets two and a suplex into the ropes gets the same. Paige gets tired of the submissions and hits Charlotte in the face a few times for two. After a leg lock from Paige, both of them score with kicks to the face as we take a break.
Back with the match turning more into a brawl until Paige kicks her down and nips back up. Charlotte puts on a rear naked choke of all things before spearing Paige out to the floor. I’m kind of digging this submission battle. At least it’s better than last night. Paige throws her into the barricade but it’s still a double countout at 15:02.
Rating: B-. WAY better than last night as there was some actual intensity and a much better story with Paige trying to do the submissions to match Charlotte because she wanted to prove she was better. It’s amazing what you can do when you actually have personality and character instead of interchangeable people like most of the roster. This was WWE’s way of saying “yeah we know last night sucked.”
Paige sends her into the steps and puts on the PTO on the table.
We recap how the main event was set up.
Here’s Heath Slater with a guitar to show us how real country music goes. He can’t even get a note off before Ryback interrupts. The guitar to the back has no effect and there’s the Shell Shock. I’m hoping Ryback at least mentions pinning the new World Champion last night.
Dean Ambrose/Dolph Ziggler vs. Kevin Owens/Tyler Breeze
Ziggler and Ambrose start things off with Tyler grabbing a wristlock. It’s quickly off to Owens vs. Ambrose but Kevin tags right back out. A quick kick to the face puts Dolph down and the heels take over. The double teaming has Dolph in trouble until he comes back with a dropkick to set up the diving tag. Dean’s suicide dive drops Breeze but he walks into a superkick from Owens. Not that it matters as Dirty Deeds puts Breeze away at 5:30. Owens stood by and watched the pin.
Rating: C. This was fine though I have no idea what it accomplished. In theory Owens vs. Ambrose is set up off last night so they could have found a way to do this without having Breeze lose. Like, Ziggler could have lost instead again, but I guess they need to make sure Tyler doesn’t get too strong or whatever.
Earlier today, JBL and El Torito argues over whether to eat Tex or Mex food. Mark Henry was brought in to decide, leading to a dream sequence where Torito did JBL’s entrance and it turns into a Hardee’s commercial.
We look at the end of last night’s show.
Rusev vs. Roman Reigns
Sheamus is in Rusev’s corner. Cole says Rusev wrestles Reigns to the ground to start and probably gets yelled at as a result. Reigns pops him in the jaw and gets two off a running neckbreaker. Back up and Rusev starts kicking Reigns in the face, only to eat a big boot to send him outside. A whip sends Rusev into the barricade and we take our last break.
Back with Rusev holding a chinlock and throwing Reigns outside for a shot from Sheamus. The champ throws him back inside and Rusev starts setting up for the Accolade. That lasts all of ten seconds before it’s off to a cravate instead. Sheamus trips Reigns again and finally gets ejected. The Samoan drop puts Rusev down but Reigns can’t follow up.
The clotheslines in the corner stagger Rusev but he comes back with a spinwheel kick. A top rope headbutt gets two on Roman and Rusev loads up the Accolade. Reigns doesn’t even bother letting it go on and comes back with a Superman Punch for two. Rusev bails to the floor before the spear can launch and superkicks Reigns to stop a charge.
Roman gets rammed into the announcers’ table a few times but comes back with the knees to the face inside, followed by a Superman Punch to knock Rusev off the apron. A countout doesn’t sound good for Reigns so he goes out to get Rusev, only to have King Barrett jump him for the DQ at 16:16.
Rating: C+. Good brawl and I like the ending with Reigns now having to fight the entire trio instead of just one at a time. It’s a good alliance and makes all three of them look better as a unit. Unfortunately it stills feels like it should be over the Intercontinental Title but they’re making do with what they can due to all of the injuries.
Barrett gets a chair but Reigns fights off Rusev, Barrett and the invading Sheamus to end the show.
Overall Rating: D. You can really see where all the injuries are starting to mount up. The problem here isn’t the lack of star power but the lack of an ability to cover three hours. Rollins may have been failing near the top, but he was taking up A LOT of TV time which has to be filled. Cena, Orton and Cesaro aren’t there to do it either and it’s really starting to show. The stuff like Neville vs. Henry and the Ryback segment were acceptable but nothing that’s going to make me want to keep watching. They need to stir things up a bit and making fun of country music because Vince finds it funny isn’t going to solve that.
Results
Luke Harper/Bray Wyatt b. Dudley Boyz – Discus lariat to Bubba
Sasha Banks b. Becky Lynch – Rollup with a handful of trunks
Neville b. Mark Henry – Red Arrow
Goldust/Prime Time Players b. Stardust/Ascension – Clash of the Titus to Konnor
Paige vs. Charlotte went to a double countout
Dolph Ziggler/Dean Ambrose b. Tyler Breeze/Kevin Owens – Dirty Deeds to Breeze
Roman Reigns b. Rusev via DQ when King Barrett interfered
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of Wrestlemania at Amazon for just $3.99 at:
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Survivor Series 2015
Date: November 22, 2015
Location: Phillips Arena, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield
This is a special show for two reasons. First of all, tonight is twenty five years to the day that the Undertaker debuted. It’s rare to see someone last ten years and Undertaker is still having good matches twenty five years later. That’s one of those statistics that isn’t going to be broken and is really remarkable when you think about it. Other than that, we have the finals of the WWE World Title tournament for the title vacated after Seth Rollins’ knee injury. Let’s get to it.
Pre-Show: Team Miz vs. Team Neville
Miz, Bo Dallas, Stardust, Ascension
Neville, Dudley Boyz, Titus O’Neil, Goldust
Survivor Series match and you have to believe they’re doing another one on the show because there are only six other matches. This is Goldust’s return after a long absence due to a shoulder injury. Goldust and Stardust start and a few right hands send Stardust over for a tag to Viktor….who is put out off a Goldust powerslam at 30 seconds. That sounds like an injury elimination.
Off to Konnor vs. Titus with O’Neil chopping away in the corner and slamming Konnor down. What’s Up sends Konnor to the floor and the Dudleyz deposit his partners next to him, setting up Neville’s big dive. Back from a break with Bubba Rock Bottoming Konnor for the elimination at 5:34.
Stardust comes in to take D-Von into the corner as we hear about the Gobbledy Gooker debuting 25 years ago today. Off to Miz who keeps up the beating, only to walk into a spinebuster. Neville comes in to clean house with his variety of kicks and a snap German suplex. A surprise Bodog and the Skull Crushing Finale take Neville out at 8:52, only to have Goldust roll Miz up for the pin at 9:03.
We’re down to Dallas/Stardust vs. Titus/Goldust/Bubba/D-Von. Back from another break with Dallas putting Goldust in a chinlock and Stardust telling the fans that there will NOT be any tables. It’s off to Stardust for a chinlock of his own, followed by another from Dallas. Goldust finally fights up and hits a clothesline, allowing for the hot tag to Titus. Everything breaks down and it’s a quick Clash of the Titus to put Dallas away at 17:13. Stardust tries to walk away but walks into 3D for the final pin at 18:03.
Rating: C-. Totally fine way to kill the pre-show time and give the fans something to watch. Goldust returning is cool and it seems to set up the idea for the show. The wrestling wasn’t anything great but for a match thrown together, it’s hard to really complain about the quality. Good enough here.
We open with Lillian Garcia singing the National Anthem as the middle finger to the ISIS threats.
The opening video focuses on both major stories with Undertaker’s anniversary and match with the Wyatts, followed by a tournament recap. There’s a great line of history being written by the survivors.
WWE World Title Tournament Semifinals: Alberto Del Rio vs. Roman Reigns
Non-title of course and the fans boo Reigns out of the building as soon as his music hits. They slug it out to start with Del Rio scoring with some kicks in the corner. Outside now with Reigns going into the barricade before Del Rio starts in on the arm, which Cesaro worked over Monday. A tilt-a-whirl slam gets a quick two for Roman as he’s hearing the dueling chants.
The bad arm goes into the steps as we see HHH watching in the back. A top rope shot to the head gets two for Alberto and we hit the chinlock. They’re moving here. The bad shoulder is sent into the post but Reigns pops right back up and nails a quick apron boot. The arm is hanging though as Reigns fires off the corner clotheslines. A Superman Punch is countered into the Backstabber for two.
The low superkick (hey he still uses that) is countered into a Samoan drop for the same. Roman tries to go aerial with a superplex but gets caught in the double stomp position (one of the only realistic ways for that to be set up). Of course it misses here though and Reigns nails the Superman Punch. Del Rio takes a long time getting up after landing on his knee but it’s all goldbricking with the spear charging into a superkick for a really close two.
For the first time since he’s been back, Del Rio tries the armbreaker but gets rolled up for another near fall. The armbreaker goes on a few seconds later and the announcers are freaking out. I have no idea why as it’s not the arm Del Rio had been working on. Reigns makes the rope and Alberto goes up for no apparent reason, only to miss some nondescript move, allowing Reigns to spear him down for the pin at 14:22.
Rating: B. Well duh. This was the biggest layup all night long but at least we had a hot match instead of the boring stuff Del Rio has been doing. It’s amazing what happens when he actually tries the logical moves instead of whatever co-operative nonsense he has to do to get the double stomps. Reigns’ arm could come into play later too.
Reigns wishes Ambrose luck and says they’ll fight next. Owens comes in and lists off Reigns being close before but always missing in the end. Tonight Owens is adding his name to the list of people who stop Reigns at the last second. Reigns still picks Dean. I know it’s not likely, but they’ve got me thinking it could be Owens.
WWE World Title Tournament Semifinals: Dean Ambrose vs. Kevin Owens
Non-title again. Dean starts with some headlocks and armdrags (straight out of an old Aiden English song) but Owens crotches him on top. The Cannonball is only good for one but the backsplash gets two. We hit the chinlock (Owens: “CHINLOCK CITY BABY!”) and HHH is shown watching again. Dean suplexes him down and they slowly get up with Owens getting the better of it.
A moonsault (you don’t see him try that one too often) misses Ambrose and the top rope elbow gets two more. They fight over a superplex with Dean running the corner to try it again, only to get caught in the swinging fisherman’s superplex (I love that move) for the nearest fall so far. The rebound lariat staggers Owens but he sends Dean outside for a drop onto the table. Back in and two straight superkicks knock Dean even sillier but he counters the Pop Up Powerbomb and grabs Dirty Deeds for the spot in the finals at 11:20.
Rating: B-. Owens continues to look like a star but that’s the second champion to lose in a row because they didn’t think this thing through that well. Either that or they don’t think anything of the title. Either way, this was the good brawl you would expect from these two with the guys beating each other up for as long as they were allowed, which is the best thing you can ask for. Neither match was great but they were a really good way to spend forty five minutes.
We look back at Undertaker’s debut and the length of his career, mainly comprised of clips of Legends With JBL.
Team Ryback vs. Team New Day
Ryback, Lucha Dragons, Usos
New Day, King Barrett, Sheamus
The hometown boy Xavier Woods has a new haircut (like a pompadour) and Big E. wants us all to cheer for it. New Day rips on the Dragons for being small, the Usos for being injured and Ryback for being bald. Sheamus wants to get jiggy on these posers and you can feel the air go out of the place in a funny bit. Kofi: “I think what he meant to say was NEW DAY ROCKS!”
Woods and Jimmy get things going with the hair being completely off limits. Jimmy of course drags him across the ring by the hair and it’s off to Jey for some chops. Cara comes in to chop Kofi as we hear about the mini Kings back in 1994. Sheamus misses a charge and falls to the floor with his partners joining him. Everyone not named Ryback dives at the same time, leaving Ryback to dive onto all nine of them. Back in and Barrett crotches Jey on top to give Sheamus two.
The Unicorn Stampede means it’s time for some tromboning to start a dance party. Kofi puts on a chinlock but an enziguri allows the tag off to Jimmy. Woods gets thrown into the corner so Barrett comes in and slugs Jimmy in the face. Jimmy superkicks him right back and a swanton from Cara gets rid of Barrett at 7:46. It’s off to Kalisto for the monkey flip splash to Kofi for two before Jimmy comes back in pretty soon after tagging out. That would be too soon as Kofi grabs a backbreaker and Woods adds a top rope knee for the pin at 9:24.
Big E. spears Cara through the ropes but comes up holding his arm, leaving Sheamus to Brogue Kick him for the pin at 10:46. Sheamus and Big E. argue over the blind tag so Sheamus lets him come back in, only to have Ryback run him over. Jey adds a Superfly Splash to get rid of Big E. at 11:38. So we’re down to Jey/Ryback/Kalisto vs. Woods/Kingston/Sheamus. Kofi and Woods walk out with Big E. at 12:30 so it’s 3-1. Sheamus starts pounding on Kalisto until it’s off to Jey for a high cross body.
The Irish Curse gets two and puts Jimmy in trouble but again Sheamus lets him tag. Ryback comes in with the clotheslines and a spinebuster but a tilt-a-whirl slam stops the Meat Hook. The numbers are really getting on Sheamus’ nerves though and it’s a blind tag to bring in Kalisto for a top rope hurricanrana. Sheamus blocks it but Jey tags himself in and superkicks Sheamus, allowing Kalisto to hurricanrana Sheamus into Ryback (who tagged himself in as well) for the Shell Shock at 17:34.
Rating: C. Again this was fine with ten guys barely affiliated having a match for the sake of filling in a spot on the card. New Day walking out was the right call as you don’t want three champions losing in three matches. This was basically a bonus and another good match as we’re waiting on the big stuff.
We recap Paige vs. Charlotte without a single reference to the big issues on Monday. Basically it’s back to being fallout from PCB splitting, which isn’t great but it’s much more in WWE’s wheelhouse.
Divas Title: Paige vs. Charlotte
Charlotte is defending and starts this big rivalry match with a waistlock. Paige takes over with some brawling before taking it outside. The champion is sent ribs first into the announcers’ table, setting up an abdominal stretch back inside. Given that an abdominal stretch hasn’t won a match since about 1972, Charlotte quickly escapes and kicks Paige in the face. There’s the Figure Four (not eight) until Paige makes the rope.
Charlotte takes it outside again and drops Paige face first onto the apron. Back in and we get a figure four neck lock with some rolls to slam Paige into the mat. Charlotte tries to go too fast though and charges into the post. For some reason that means it’s time for Paige to work on the ribs with a bodyscissors.
That doesn’t last either and it’s time to slug it out, followed by Charlotte scoring with the spear. The unnamed Natural Selection sends Paige to the floor but she pops right back up. They get on the barricade for no apparent reason, allowing Charlotte to hit another big spear. Back in and the Figure Eight makes Paige tap at 14:20.
Rating: C-. The story killed this one as I’m really not sure what they were going for. I mean, I get that Paige was trying to get in her head but they don’t just insult Ric instead? It wasn’t bad or anything but some of the psychology was off and took away some of my interest. Watchable but not much more.
Reigns and Ambrose are ready to fight like brothers.
Tyler Breeze vs. Dolph Ziggler
This is trying to salvage something from the Rusev/Ziggler/Lana story. Breeze takes him down to start and lays over the top like he should be doing. A headlock puts Tyler down as well and now it’s time for Ziggler to have a rest on top too. They head outside with Breeze hiding behind Summer, allowing him to send Ziggler into the steps. Back in and Ziggler gets caught in a half crab but it’s quickly off to the ropes.
Ziggler makes his comeback with the normal stuff, including a neckbreaker and the big elbow for two. A nice pinfall reversal sequence gives us a bunch of two counts before Dolph just slams him face first into the mat. Breeze bails to avoid the superkick (like any model would do) and kicks him in the knee, setting up the Unprettier to give Tyler the clean pin at 6:45.
Rating: C-. Ziggler jobbing isn’t a story again but at least Breeze won clean in his big match debut (yeah the tournament wasn’t really a big match as everyone knew what was going to happen there). I don’t think Breeze is ever going to be more than a jobber to the stars but at least he had a good debut.
We recap the Wyatts vs. the Brothers of Destruction. Bray targeted Undertaker at the end of Hell in Cell before kidnapping Undertaker and Kane. He stole their souls (whatever that means), setting up this regular tag instead of what could have been a cool elimination tag).
Bray Wyatt/Luke Harper vs. Undertaker/Kane
Undertaker gets the big entrance for his anniversary, though I’m sure more is coming. Rowan gets chokeslammed before the bell, leaving Harper as the official partner, which hadn’t been announced yet. Kane works on Harper to start before it’s off to Undertaker to really wake the crowd up. Harper has to get out of the Tombstone and it’s off to Bray who eats the jumping clothesline.
That’s it for Bray so Harper takes Old School as the fans tell Undertaker that he still has it. The apron legdrop has Harper in more trouble and Kane goes after Bray, only to have Strowman throw him over the announcers’ table. That’s not a DQ though and the Wyatts take over on Kane. The running cross body takes Kane down but Bray takes too much time mocking Undertaker and gets slammed down for his efforts. It’s already hot tag time (seven minutes in) for Undertaker and house is cleaned again.
Bray and Luke clothesline him to the floor though, only to have Strowman take the double chokeslam through the table. Back in and Sister Abigail out of nowhere gets two on Undertaker and Luke clotheslines Kane. No cover of course as Bray is busy doing the Spider Walk. The Brothers do the stereo sit up and it’s a double chokeslam to the Wyatts. Harper takes the Tombstone for the pin at 10:21.
Rating: D+. At least it wasn’t Bray. This was a post show dark match aired on pay per view and that’s not what they needed to go with here. I get the idea of the big moment for Undertaker but he’s had big moments at the last few pay per views now. Harper getting pinned makes sense and it’s not the worst loss in the world, but Undertaker needs to put Bray over soon.
Nothing special for Undertaker after the match as he and Kane just do their signature pose.
WWE World Title: Roman Reigns vs. Dean Ambrose
Ambrose has already lost his shirt and they go at it right after the big match intros. A clothesline puts Reigns on the floor and Dean follows with the suicide dive. Back in and Dean hammers away until Reigns powerbombs him out of the corner ala Undertaker. Reigns gets two more off a sitout powerbomb but Dean runs him over. The top rope elbow is blocked with a Superman Punch though and both guys are down.
Neither finisher can hit (way too early) but the rebound lariat is countered into a spear for two (shows what I know). There was almost zero hit on that near fall. A second spear hits post and Dirty Deeds gets two on a much hotter cover. Both guys sit up so they slug it out from the mat. Back up and the spear out of nowhere gives Reigns the title at 8:39.
Rating: D. Wait what? Like seriously, what? It’s 10:38 and the main event just ended in less than nine minutes. The fans didn’t react and there’s no reason to care with a win that fast. Reigns getting the belt is a good idea but that’s really the best way they can do it? That really doesn’t work and I’m guessing they’re using the time for an Undertaker celebration but this was a bad, bad move.
Dean hugs his friend and leaves as confetti falls. Cue a smiling and applauding HHH to offer a handshake but Reigns spears him instead. Sheamus comes in for a Brogue Kick and here we go.
WWE World Title: Roman Reigns vs. Sheamus
The Brogue Kick only gets two but a second gives Sheamus the title at 39 seconds. So was Ambrose off checking the Bengals score?
HHH and Sheamus leave together to end the show, but we cut back to the arena as Reigns gets up…..and leaves to add nothing else.
Overall Rating: C-. The wrestling was mostly good but I only started getting excited in the last five minutes because it was a title change. Reigns can rise up again and win the title later, but sweet goodness that match was nothing to see and Reigns is just dying to turn heel. Sheamus is clearly just a placeholder champion and that’s fine, but it was a pretty lackluster ending. The opening two matches are both good though and it was certainly a big ending so I’ll call the show passable but a letdown given what else they could have done.
Results
Roman Reigns b. Alberto Del Rio – Spear
Dean Ambrose b. Kevin Owens – Dirty Deeds
Team Ryback b. Team New Day – Shell Shock to Sheamus
Charlotte b. Paige – Figure Eight
Tyler Breeze b. Dolph Ziggler – Unprettier
Undertaker/Kane b. Bray Wyatt/Luke Harper – Tombstone to Harper
Roman Reigns b. Dean Ambrose – Spear
Sheamus b. Roman Reigns – Brogue Kick
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of Wrestlemania at Amazon for just $3.99 at:
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Survivor Series 2014
Date: November 23, 2014
Location: Scottrade Center, St. Louis, Missouri
Attendance: 12,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler
Now this is going to be an interesting one as the whole show is built around one match and that one match’s big surprise. Last year they made no secret about the show being entirely built around one single match, which wound up making the way to make the whole thing work. That one match is Team Cena vs. Team Authority for Cena and company’s jobs vs. the Authority having power. The jobs were thrown in at the last minute to really hammer home who was going to win but that’s not always the worst thing. Let’s get to it.
Pre-Show: Fandango vs. Justin Gabriel
This is the NEW AND IMPROVED Fandango, meaning he has Rosa Mendes and now wears a white shirt. We’re ready to go after the dance sequence that kills even more time. They slowly punch each other to start with Gabriel, who has skeleton tights for no apparent reason (JBL: “The leftovers from Giant Gonzalez.”), getting knocked to the floor.
Back in and Justin breaks out of a chinlock and gets two off a springboard kick to the face. For someone who flies around as much as Gabriel, the fans are almost totally silent. A suplex slam (as in a suplex where Fandango never left his feet) takes Gabriel down and the guillotine legdrop is good enough to put Justin away at 3:10.
Rating: D-. You know how Fandango still hasn’t done anything since his “rebirth” here? After this match it really surprises me that he still has a job as this was so horribly boring. Naturally they did the same match again the next night on Raw because maybe they just didn’t get the point across here. Really boring match.
Pre-Show: Cesaro vs. Jack Swagger
The battle of the former Real Americans. On the way to the ring, Cesaro talks about the history of Swiss neutrality before picking Team Authority. He proclaims his allegiance in various languages (which is NOTHING that could ever be capitalized in around the world) until Swagger and Colter come in to pick Team Cena. Swagger gets a quick rollup for two to start, earning himself a gutwrench suplex.
The Patriot Lock has Cesaro in early trouble but he’s still able to throw Swagger down with a German suplex. More suplexes set up a chinlock. Back up and Swagger grabs a German of his own, followed by a chop block to stay on the leg. The Vader Bomb is blocked but Swagger grabs the Patriot Lock. That goes nowhere and more Germans are rolled, only to have Swagger counter into the Patriot Lock again for the submission at 5:23.
Rating: C-. They crammed a lot of suplexes into just five minutes. This also shows you how much better a match can be if you have interesting people in there. Swagger isn’t the best in the world but there’s at least a reason to care about him and more than one note to his character. I’ll take Cesaro being all serious and speaking different languages over HE’S A DANCER IN A WHITE SHIRT any day.
The opening video recaps the main event, which was set up on Vince’s whim. That’s the problem with so much of what the Authority does: whatever happens can be changed by either the two of them or Vince because they’re the ultimate powers. No matter how the story goes, someone with power can come in and change anything at the drop of a hat. Why hasn’t Vince come back and changed something else on a whim? Eh no real reason other than the plot hasn’t called for it. That’s really bad writing.
Here’s Vince to open things up with talking. Vince talks (see, I told you that’s what he was going to do) about how epic this is really going to be and brings out the Authority because we haven’t heard from them in the first five minutes. The sucking up begins immediately but Vince cuts them off to bring out Cena.
Vince recaps the main event as we’re just burning through pay per view time here. Cena asks if the Authority will leave on their own accord if they lose tonight. HHH says that Cena is going to have a bad holiday because four men’s responsibilities will be on his head after tonight. Those four men are going to be forgotten about because they’re the ones with everything to lose. Cena will keep his job because he’s such a big star, but he’ll have that on his head forever.
Stephanie suggests that someone on Team Cena will turn on him because they have to think of themselves. She says the Authority will still have their jobs at headquarters and run things from afar, but Vince says not so fast. They’ll still have desk jobs and be in charge of different departments but they’ll have no authority on screen.
One more thing: if the Authority does lose tonight, only Cena can bring them back. That’s the moment where they gave away the ending and everyone knew the Authority would be back by the end of the year at the latest. Stephanie goes into full STEPHANIE IS SHOUTING mode but Cena says the Authority will lose tonight.
So to recap the recap (which took us to fifteen minutes into the show): the Authority will still have jobs and huge salaries but they just don’t have to deal with the headaches of running the show. On top of that, Cena can bring them back because FOREVER means until Cena says otherwise. This is all stuff that could have been done on Raw but why not waste pay per view time on it. I know their line is “But it’s a free month on the Network!” That’s not an excuse to do something stupid like this as it’s a really bad way to get the show going when this could have been done in five minutes on any given TV show.
Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Miz/Damien Mizdow vs. Los Matadores vs. Goldust/Stardust
Goldust and Stardust (villains here) are defending and Mizdow is one of the most popular guys on the roster because of how hard he’s been working with the stunt double character. Diego and Stardust start things off as Cole reads Stardust’s latest riddle. A quick rollup gets two on Stardust before it’s off to Miz who is stopped by OLE! Mizdow does his stunt double stuff on the floor as JBL talks about Papa Shango putting a curse on Mizdow years ago. This isn’t a rousing start to the commentary tonight.
Miz won’t tag out, again missing the point of having a stunt double. Jey comes in to chop Diego but Goldust tags himself in and chinlocks the Samoan. The fans continue to want Mizdow but Stardust waves them off and uppercuts Jey instead. This time it’s Miz tagging himself in but Fernando tags Jey and flips off the top and onto Miz.
It’s FINALLY off to Mizdow, only to have Goldust tag himself in ten seconds later to bring the crowd back to silence. Lawler brings up a great point: if Mizdow comes in and Miz is on the apron, shouldn’t Mizdow just stand there? Stardust comes in and stomps Fernando before cranking on both arms to slow things down a bit. Goldust stomps Fernando on the floor (brothers think alike) and we hit the chinlock. Things stay slow as we hear about Grumpy Cat appearing on Raw. I had been trying to forget that guys.
Stardust loads up what looks like a Tombstone but Fernando spins out into a tornado DDT (good one too) and it’s off to Jimmy. Now we pick things up a bit with the Usos cleaning house with Umaga attacks and superkicks (and a shaking camera, which has happened multiple times tonight). Goldust powerslams Jimmy down for two but the double Uso dive takes down a few people.
There’s the Falling Star from Stardust, giving us this brilliant exchange: Cole: “That’s the Falling Star!” “JBL: “I have no idea what that is!” Cole: “It’s the Falling Star!” JBL: “I know!” Torito gets thrown onto the pile and Diego does the same. Back in and a quadruple Tower of Doom takes down Los Matadores and the champs, allowing Mizdow to tag himself in and pin Goldust for the titles at 15:25.
Rating: C. This was a big longer than it needed to be but the payoff was exactly what it needed to be. There was no reason to wait any longer on giving Mizdow something and this opens the door for some new possibilities in the story. The match was fun but they could have cut out a few minutes to make it flow better. It’s fun enough though (annoying commentary aside) and a good way to open the show, after the long talking of course.
Miz takes both titles and Mizdow keeps posing.
Larry the Cable Guy is guest hosting Raw. As usual, WWE is about ten years behind the pop culture times.
Vince will be on the Steve Austin Show. Now that could be entertaining and it kind of was if I remember correctly.
Adam Rose and the Bunny do a toy commercial until Heath Slater and Titus O’Neil come in to set up a match for later. Fans: “NO! NO! NO!” Is it bad that I miss the Bunny and wanted to see more of him?
Team Paige vs. Team Team Fox
Paige, Cameron, Summer Rae, Layla
Alicia Fox, Natalya, Emma, Naomi
Natalya is accompanied by Tyson Kidd, who clearly doesn’t care in a great short run character. Paige and Natalya start things off on the mat and we hit the King’s Court reference which turns into a discussion of Lawler having a foursome. Paige is sent to the floor for a quick spank from Natalya (because of course) before it’s off to Layla vs. Emma, neither of whom are still on the main roster. Lawler: “Emma could trip over cordless phones.” That’s not very hard to do King.
It’s back to Paige for a headbutt and THIS IS MY HOUSE. How can she afford this many houses? Cameron comes in to break up a tag attempt and this could go badly. The fans want Mizdow again and good grief it’s the Daniel Bryan story all over again. You just had him for fifteen minutes when he won a title. Be happy with what you got and shut up already. Emma rolls over and tags Naomi for the big showdown that no one wanted to see. Naomi runs through Cameron and a bad looking wheelbarrow Stunner gets two.
Everything breaks down and Cameron does an awful bulldog, allowing Naomi to roll her up for the elimination at 6:12. Summer kicks Naomi down to take over, only to miss a splash. Fox comes in as the announcers ignore the match to talk about old Survivor Series teams. The heels bail so Fox tries to get a CHICKEN chant started. It’s off to Layla for her bouncy cross body but a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gives Alicia the elimination at 9:29.
Summer comes in and misses a charge, allowing Natalya to dropkick her down. It’s off to Paige who takes over, only to have Summer do Paige’s scream and get decked as a result. Emma comes in for the Dilemma, a forearm to Paige on the apron and the Emma Lock for the submission on Summer at 12:04. So Paige is all alone and starts with Emma, who quickly faceplants her down. Natalya eats a superkick so it’s off to Naomi for the Rear View and the headscissors DDT for the final pin at 14:16.
Rating: D-. Oh sweet goodness the Divas Revolution needed to happen soon. This match felt like it was going on forever with almost none of them looking like they should have been out there this long. Between “CHICKEN! CHICKEN!” and Layla’s face offense under the guise of a heel and Cameron being the disaster that only she can be, this was horrible with Paige and Natalya not being able to hold it together.
Kidd, who didn’t do a thing all match, celebrates more than anyone else in a great touch. That’s the highlight of the last fifteen minutes.
We recap the pre-show, which also included the return of Bad News Barrett. As usual, Cesaro gets left out. The best part: Renee Young with long hair. I had forgotten about that and it says a lot that she’s just as beautiful with her hair hacked off.
The panel talks for a bit.
We recap Bray Wyatt vs. Dean Ambrose, which started when Wyatt targeted Ambrose in October for whatever reason Bray picks his next target. There was something about Dean’s dad being in prison but it was never really explained. Ambrose said he didn’t care why Wyatt did it anyway so it didn’t really matter. Tonight is the first match.
Dean Ambrose vs. Bray Wyatt
They slug it out to start (shocking) before heading outside (even more shocking) where Dean takes over with some clotheslines. Back in and Bray runs Dean over before knocking a dive out of the air with a right hand. I can never get used to Bray’s blood red tattoos as they always fool me. We hit a seated full nelson on Dean (always nice to see them mix up the rest holds) before he fights up for a double cross body.
They go outside for the third time for a double clothesline and both guys are down again. Back in and Dean takes over before doing Bray’s lean upside down out of the corner in a nice touch. Dean ties him in the ropes and kisses Bray on the head before a dropkick and legdrop get two. Bray counters the Rebound Lariat into a release Rock Bottom for two as this match really hasn’t taken off yet.
The middle rope backsplash misses because it would have killed Dean and the top rope elbow gets two for Ambrose. Back up and Bray EXPLODES with a clothesline and he makes it even worse with another Rock Bottom onto the steps. That’s only good for two so Bray grabs a mic and says they could have ruled the world together. Dean has chosen his path though so Bray grabs a chair and drops to his knees like he did with Cena at Wrestlemania. Dean isn’t Cena though and he hits Bray with the chair for the DQ at 14:00.
Rating: C+. Much like the Cena match at Wrestlemania, this felt a lot more like it was designed to set up something else (which it was) instead of being a big showdown. Bray’s babbling gets to the point where you stop caring what he’s talking about and that doesn’t make for the most interesting matches. No matter how you look at it, the whole thing always feels like you’re waiting on the next big thing, which gets repetitive in a hurry. It’s still a fun brawl though and got going after the first few minutes.
Post match Dean lays Bray out and elbows him through a table. That’s not enough for him as he buries Bray under another table and a pile of chairs. That’s only T and C though so why not pull out a ladder? Dean climbs the ladder but is all like “this is the free month so you have to pay to see me dive off.” Referees won’t let him shove the ladder onto the pile either.
The Authority gives their team a long pep talk, including Stephanie crying at the thought of only having a huge salary and working in an office. This is one of the problems of having such a big main event: there’s so much time to fill which certainly couldn’t have been filled with another Survivor Series match. This talk eats up WAY too much time and is summed up as “we’re betting everything we have tonight so win or else.”
Adam Rose/The Bunny vs. Heath Slater/Titus O’Neil
Slater and the Bunny get things going but Rose tags himself in quickly. Heath gets him on the mat before it’s off to Titus for some forearms to the back. Rose dives over and makes the tag. Lawler: “Maybe we should explain why there’s a bunny in the ring.” Cole: “Well it’s actually a man in a bunny suit.” Good grief just start speaking gibberish to us since they clearly think we’re that stupid. The Bunny pins Slater off a middle rope dropkick.
The Rosebuds leave with the Bunny.
More commercials. Counting the opener, the pep talk and all these commercials, there’s probably been seventeen minutes wasted, or about the same amount of time spent on a quick Survivor Series match.
The injured Roman Reigns has a satellite interview where he talks about wanting to be here punching people. We’ll make it nineteen minutes of filler. Reigns will be back in a month.
Team Cena says they’re ready.
Divas Title: Nikki Bella vs. AJ Lee
AJ is defending and Nikki has Brie as her unwilling assistant. After the big match intros and Brie gets on the apron for a distraction, followed by kissing AJ (and launching a thousand fanfics). The Rack Attack gives us a new champion at 38 seconds in the Daniel Bryan vs. Sheamus finish. Allegedly this was the way the match was going the entire time and it wasn’t cut down, making me shake my head even more.
Of course the sisters are back together with an eventual explanation of “we’re sisters.”
Ambrose vs. Wyatt is announced for TLC in the namesake match.
We recap the main event. The Authority is all corrupt so Vince came in and said let’s put their power up against Team Cena. John put together a team of the few people who would fight with him so the Authority made them as miserable as they could. It’s a simple story but they’ve made this feel like a legitimately huge match.
Team Cena vs. Team Authority
John Cena, Big Show, Ryback, Dolph Ziggler, Erick Rowan
Seth Rollins, Kane, Rusev, Mark Henry, Luke Harper
Cena’s partners’ jobs vs. the Authority’s authority. Harper is Intercontinental Champion and Rusev is the undefeated US Champion. The eleven entrances eat up even more time but in a good way this time. They’ve done a really good job at making this feel like a big deal and it’s working well here. Henry and Show start but HHH has to get in one last pep talk, allowing Show to knock him out for the elimination at 50 seconds.
It’s Rollins in next but Show chops him down to the floor. Kane comes in but Show drags him into the corner for the tag off to Cena, who pounds on Kane even more. Now we get a showdown that the fans find bigger than it probably is with Rowan vs. Harper. This was during that short period where Rowan was a genius, which has been completely forgotten since. Rollins tags himself back in before anything can happen and is immediately caught in the wrong corner.
Ryback comes in to join in on the fun but Rollins tags out to Harper. That’s fine with Ryback as he grabs a vertical suplex, only to get punched in the face by Kane. The big bald is beaten down as well so we’ll try Rusev. A spinebuster ends the slugout but Shell Shock is broken up. Everything breaks down and it’s a Curb Stomp from Rollins and the jumping superkick from Rusev to eliminate Ryback and tie us up.
Show comes back in but Rusev escapes a quick chokeslam attempt and brings in Harper. A dropkick of all things puts Show down and it’s back to Kane for some stomping. Kane follows Harper’s suit with a (basement) dropkick, followed by the Gator Roll (he’s stopped using that) from Harper. Show throws Harper away too so it’s off to Ziggler, who Harper beat (through some shenanigans) to win the title.
The heels start taking over on Ziggler with Kane’s sidewalk slam getting two. A comeback is stopped by a boot to the face and it’s off to Rusev for some knees to the ribs. Ziggler tries to punch Rollins in the face but gets caught in a downward spiral into the corner. We hit the chinlock for a bit before the running DDT plants Rusev. Everything breaks down again and we hit the parade of finishers (always a favorite).
Rollins is thrown onto a pile but Rusev throws Ziggler onto that pile. It’s time to load up the announcers’ table but Rusev misses Ziggler and splashes through the table instead, leading to a countout at 21:02 to make it 4-3. Cole: “COUNTOUTS ARE A FACTOR! COUNTOUTS ARE A FACTOR! COME ON DOLPH! COME ON DOLPH! ZIGGLER’S IN! ZIGGLER’S IN! RUSEV IS OUT! RUSEV IS OUT!” Get the parrot a cracker and shut him up already.
Back in and the exhausted Ziggler tags Cena for a quick AA to Kane. Rollins makes the save with a Curb Stomp and everyone is down. A double tag brings in Harper and Rowan with Erick cleaning house. Kane’s chokeslam is broken up but the springboard knee from Rollins sets up Harper’s discus lariat to put Rowan out at 24:14. So it’s Show/Cena/Ziggler vs. Rollins/Kane/Harper and we get a big six man staredown….until Show KO’s Cena, turning heel again to fill his quota for the year. Rollins steals the pin to eliminate Cena at 25:11. Now THAT is a shock.
Show stares down at the Authority and then walks out at 26:30, leaving Ziggler down 3-1. Ziggler can barely stand after the long beating he took but it’s now the Shawn formula in 2005. The fans want Orton (who was put out by Rollins a few weeks ago but why have the hometown boy here to make the save when you can have him on a movie set instead? To make it worse, Stephanie chants “OH YEAH! OH YEAH! OH YEAH!” in what was supposed to be cheerleading.
Kane throws Ziggler into the barricade and Rollins drags him over to the corner for some tags to the eliminated partners. Kane’s superplex is broken up though and a quick superkick and Zig Zag make it 2-1 at 29:35. Harper is right in though and kicks Ziggler’s head off to send him outside, followed by a nice suicide shove. A great sounding superkick gets two on Ziggler and the sitout powerbomb amazingly only gets the same. Ziggler somehow grabs a rollup (and jeans) for a fast elimination at 31:35, leaving us one on one.
Dolph can barely stand but he still grabs a DDT for two. Rollins has way more gas though and hammers Ziggler down, only to miss a top rope knee. The Fameasser gets two out of nowhere as HHH and Stephanie are losing their minds on the outside. Noble and Mercury are dispatched and the Zig Zag connects but HHH pulls the referee out at two.
The J’s are dispatched again and Stephanie is knocked off the apron (onto HHH of course because Heaven forbid she not have a soft landing). Another Curb Stomp misses and there’s a second Zig Zag for two with HHH breaking up the pin one more time. HHH beats on Ziggler for a bit and hits a Pedigree…..and there’s a crow.
In one of the biggest surprises of all time, STING makes his WWE debut (with JBL listing off his resume to make sure you know this was planned in advance) and HHH is in shock. Sting decks HHH’s crooked referee and does the big staredown with HHH, setting up the Death Drop (sold really well too). Sting pulls Ziggler on top of Rollins (who hasn’t moved in over six minutes) for the final pin at 44:07.
Rating: A. I liked this even better knowing what was coming. They did a really good job of setting up the story here as both teams were in enough trouble at different points to keep it interesting with the Cena elimination being the biggest of them all. I was genuinely surprised when that happened and it holds up well enough as a moment today. The near falls near the end were great as well, making this a really great match. This should have been a total star making performance for Ziggler but since WWE is in charge, it was pretty much forgotten in about a month.
HHH looks like reality sets in while Stephanie shows her horrible acting skills one more time. For once I’m fine with the focus being on them but good grief that screeching is killing it. On top of that, everyone knew they would be back sooner than later and it didn’t even last a month.
Overall Rating: B-. This is the definition of a one match show and thankfully that one match delivered because the rest of this show was pretty horrible. Everything from the end of Ambrose vs. Wyatt to the start of the main event was a waste of time or boring, as was so often the case in WWE at this point. The main event bails the show out, but that’s the ONLY thing worth watching on here.
Ratings Comparison
Fandango vs. Justin Gabriel
Original: D
2015 Redo: D-
Cesaro vs. Jack Swagger
Original: C-
2015 Redo: C-
Usos vs. Miz/Damien Mizdow vs. Goldust/Stardust vs. Los Matadores
Original: C+
2015 Redo: C
Team Paige vs. Team Fox
Original: D-
2015 Redo: D-
Dean Ambrose vs. Bray Wyatt
Original: B-
2015 Redo: C+
Slater Gator vs. Adam Rose/The Bunny
Original: N/A
2015 Redo: N/A
AJ Lee vs. Nikki Bella
Original: N/A
2015 Redo: N/A
Team Cena vs. Team Authority
Original: B+
2015 Redo: A
Overall Rating
Original: C
2015 Redo: B-
Here’s the original review if you’re interested:
http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2014/11/23/survivor-series-2014-i-believe-it/
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of Wrestlemania at Amazon for just $3.99 at:
http://www.amazon.com/dp/B0188BJRGU
And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:
Survivor Series 2009
Date: November 22, 2009
Location: Verizon Center, Washington, D.C.
Attendance: 12,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Matt Striker
By this point a lot of the top mainstays are firmly established on top of the company. Cena is the star that everyone knows him as now, Orton is becoming one of the top heels and Punk is rising up the card. Now that things have stopped shuffling, we can get down to some solid stories and matches. However, the midcard is about to be in a major state of flux. Let’s get to it.
We get clips from every Survivor Series for the opening video. The extended clips stop at 1990 though.
Team Miz vs. Team Morrison
The Miz, Drew McIntyre, Sheamus, Dolph Ziggler, Jack Swagger
John Morrison, Matt Hardy, Evan Bourne, Shelton Benjamin, Finlay
Miz and Morrison used to be partners but have since split and started a feud. Hardy and Benjamin would be gone from WWE in 2010, Finlay would become a trainer and only part time wrestler in the same year, and Morrison wouldn’t make it to 2012. Bourne (a high flier) would stay active but eventually be out over two years with a foot injury. Morrison is Intercontinental Champion.
On the other side you have four World Champions and Drew McIntyre (later known as Drew Galloway in TNA). Miz is US Champion here. McIntyre (a Scottish wrestler with a lot of potential) has only been around for about three months and Sheamus (an Irish brawler) has only been on Raw less than a month.
Bourne and Swagger get things going with Evan grabbing a quick rollup for two. Ziggler comes in for the Hennig neck snap and a modified belly to belly suplex for two. Back to Swagger who pounds on the back of Bourne and brings Dolph back in again, hooking a half crab on Evan. Bourne escapes and comes back with a hurricanrana out of the corner and a jumping knee to the face.
There’s the hot tag to Matt (BIG pop) and a double elbow to the back of Ziggler’s head by Evan and Matt. The Side Effect sets up Air Bourne (great looking shooting star press) for the elimination of Ziggler, but McIntyre comes in immediately and Future Shocks (double arm DDT) Bourne to tie it back up. Finlay charges in to fight McIntyre and hits that Regal Roll of his. Off to Sheamus and Striker goes oooo.
They stare each other down but a Miz distraction allows Sheamus to Brogue Kick Finlay down for the pin. Matt comes in to pound on Sheamus but he walks into a powerslam for two for the pale one. Off to Miz who drops a leg and puts on a reverse chinlock. The Reality Check (backbreaker into a neckbreaker) gets two and it’s off to a front facelock.
Hardy reverses but Swagger comes in and drops ax handles on his back to keep Matt in. Jack hooks a chinlock but Matt counters into a sleeper, from which he drops Swagger onto the back of his head in a kind of neckbreaker. Hot tag brings in Morrison to speed thing up. Morrison gets sent into the post but avoids the Vader Bomb. After taking out Miz, the Flying Chuck (Disaster kick) kills Jack for two as everything breaks down. The referee gets run over and once things calm down, Morrison hits a knee to Swagger’s chest and Starship Pain (twisting split legged moonsault) ties things up by eliminating Swagger.
Miz comes in and hits his running corner clothesline followed by a top rope double ax for two. Off to a quickly broken chinlock and it’s back to Shelton, now with gold hair in an idea that never did work. A Stinger Splash and a northern lights suplex gets two and Benjamin keeps knocking Miz away whenever Miz comes at him. A bridging German suplex gets two for Shelton as the original referee is being checked for a concussion. Sheamus breaks up a neckbreaker from Shelton and Miz hits the Skull Crushing Finale to take out Benjamin.
Off to Matt vs. Drew as things slow down a bit. They send each other into opposite corners with Matt taking over via a neckbreaker and the yelling legdrop for two. Another neckbreaker puts McIntyre down but Matt goes up and misses a moonsault press. A second Future Shock (called a Kobashi DDT by Striker) gets a second elimination for Drew, leaving us with Morrison vs. Sheamus/Miz/McIntyre.
Morrison starts with McIntyre and pounds away in the corner as Striker quotes Jim Morrison lyrics. Drew sends him into the corner and it’s off to Sheamus for some double stomping. Miz comes back in for some trash talk followed by a slugout. Morrison takes over but it’s quickly off to Sheamus to run John over. Morrison kicks all three heels down but the Flying Chuck is caught by a Brogue Kick out of the air, followed by the High Cross (Razor’s Edge) for the final elimination.
Rating: C+. This was your typical Survivor Series match and hopefully it gives us the definitive ending to the feud between the captains. Morrison was the more athletically gifted guy but Miz would go on to much better things. I’m not sure if it was more his talent or the complete lack of expectations for him but Miz went miles ahead of Morrison soon after this. Sheamus would get the Raw World Title in less than a month.
Team Kofi talks strategy but Christian feels awkward among four people not like him. His partners are MVP, Kofi Kingston, R-Truth and Mark Henry. Christian says he’s the only one that’s….you know…..from ECW. The awkward responses ensue and Christian thinks they thought it was because he’s Canadian. Christian “raps” and mentions the race thing, drawing stares. Everyone eventually cracks up.
We recap Batista vs. Rey Mysterio. They had been tag partners but Rey got pinned a few times. At Bragging Rights, Batista snapped and turned heel on Rey in one of the best heel turns in years. I loved this turn because it’s so simple: Batista got tired of losing over and over and then, very calmly, he said he was going to rip Rey’s head off, and then he DID. Rey begged for mercy, but Batista kept beating on him and hurting him, turning him into a big, muscle headed bully, which is one of the best kinds.
Rey Mysterio vs. Batista
Rey takes the leg out quickly and tries the 619 but Batista bails. Rey follows and is immediately slammed against the apron and Big Dave takes over. Mysterio tries to fire off some kicks but Batista clotheslines his head off to stop Rey cold. The Batista Bomb is escaped as is a powerslam and Rey goes after the knee.
Rey kicks Batista into 619 position but Batista grabs the legs out of the air but can’t hit the Bomb yet. Mysterio sends him to the floor for a seated senton but Batista shrugs it off. Back in and Rey hits a pair of 619’s to the back and the ribs and a third to the face. Another springboard seated senton puts Batista down and Rey goes up for the Eddie Guerrero dance, only to dive onto knees. Batista kills Rey with a spear and there’s the spinebuster. The Batista Bomb kills Rey but Dave won’t cover. There’s another Bomb and a third so the referee stops the match.
Rating: C+. I liked this for the story it was telling and the match wasn’t all that important. This was cool to see as Batista let out some of his anger and didn’t have to get pinned by some stupid rollup or anything like that. Sometimes you need some violence and the destruction of someone instead of them being able to stand tall. Let the bad guy win once in awhile and let him look strong. Then when someone stands up to him and beats him, they’re a hero. For some reason, this never happens anymore.
Post match Batista brings in a chair and picks up a begging Rey. He hits a spinebuster onto the chair, but the key here is the look on his face. There is no emotion on it at all and it’s like he has to do this because it’s who he is. Awesome all around. Rey is taken out on a stretcher.
Orton doesn’t like his team. Punk doesn’t really want to hear it.
We recap Team Kofi vs. Team Orton. Orton was all evil and psycho so Kofi stood up to him. This resulted in what looked to be one of the best face pushes in a long time, as Kofi showed some AWESOME emotion and looking like a serious threat to take Orton down. He destroyed an Orton racecar and then got in a BIG brawl with Orton all over Madison Square Garden, capped off by a Boom Drop through a table.
Unfortunately, the beginning of this saw Kofi miss his cue and make Orton look stupid, so guess what happened to Kofi’s push at the end of this program. Since, you know, months of awesome promos and buildup and crowd reactions should be thrown away for the sake of a three second error that no one remembers. The package easily edits it out here, but hey, EVERYONE remembers EVERYTHING that happens on Raw right? That’s why everything is recapped: so EVERYONE that remember EVERYTHING can remember it even better.
Team Randy Orton vs. Team Kofi Kingston
Kofi Kingston, MVP, Mark Henry, R-Truth, Christian
Randy Orton, Cody Rhodes, Ted DiBiase, CM Punk, William Regal
Christian is ECW Champion and is feuding with Regal. Mark Henry and MVP are a team and feuding with Legacy (Rhodes and DiBiase. That’s DiBiase Jr. of course. He never did much but he had potential.). Orton is pleased that he gets to fight Kofi but Henry starts instead. Henry throws Randy into Orton’s corner where Henry beats up all four of them. There’s a bearhug as Striker says being a Rumble winner might help Orton with strategy here. What does a battle royal have to do with an elimination tag match? Anyway, Legacy helps their boss out and it’s an RKO to eliminate Henry in less than a minute.
MVP comes in and Team Orton all bails to the floor. After the quick huddle outside, here’s Orton again to face MVP but Rhodes makes a blind tag to stomp away on him. It’s quickly off to DiBiase then Regal then Punk to stomp away until Punk hooks a chinlock. MVP fights up and hits a suplex that looked like it lacked contact before bringing Truth in. Truth does his backflip into the splits but Rhodes’ distraction lets Punk hit the GTS to eliminate the rapper.
Christian comes in next to face Punk and they trade basic stuff to start. Punk gets in a knee to the ribs and it’s off to DiBiase for a middle rope elbow which gets two. Christian tries the Killswitch but walks into a powerslam instead. Dream Street (cobra clutch slam) and the Killswitch are both countered so Christian kicks DiBiase in the ribs and hits the spinning sunset flip out of the corner to make it 4-3.
Regal comes in immediately and gets all fired up but gets dropkicked down. There’s the tag to Kofi and things speed way up. Kofi fires off punches in the corner and but Regal fires off some punches to slow Kofi down. Off to Rhodes for more punches and kicks before Regal comes in again. MVP gets the tag and hits the Drive By (running boot to the head) to take Regal out and tie us up at three each (Kofi/MVP/Christian vs. Orton/Rhodes/Punk).
Cody comes in with a top rope cross body but MVP rolls through it for two. Rhodes gets caught in the good guy corner and it’s Canadian time as Christian pounds him into another corner. Tornado DDT is broken up and Christian is in trouble already. Cody wraps his legs around Christian as things slow down again. Off to Randy again who hits a gorgeous dropkick for two. Off to Rhodes who misses a knee drop so it’s back to MVP. It’s more basic punches and the Ballin Elbow for no cover. MVP has to knock Orton down and gets caught in Cross Rhodes to make it 3-2.
Kofi comes in and rolls up Cody for a VERY hot two count before it’s back to Christian. The Canadian works on the arm before it’s back to Kofi with a springboard shot to the arm as well. Christian and Kofi take turns on Cody until the Killswitch takes him out. This was simple yet effective. It’s down to Punk/Orton vs. Christian/Kofi which is a spiffy little tag match.
Orton comes in to face Christian and a right hand takes Captain Charisma down. Christian has to take Punk down off the apron but still manages to avoid the RKO and hit the Killswitch for two as Punk saves. Punk distracts Christian and it’s an RKO to make it 2-1. Kofi wants Orton but Randy tags out when he sees Kingston there. Punk and Kofi stare at each other a bit before slugging it out with Kofi taking over with some HARD forearms.
The GTS and Trouble in Paradise both miss and we’ve got a stalemate. Kofi hits a big dropkick and the SOS for two. Orton is walking around on the floor as Punk takes over. Off to a leg choke which shifts to a body vice with the legs as some time is killed. Kofi fights up but a splash hits Punk’s knees.
A falcon’s arrow gets two for CM but the bulldog out of the corner is countered with a belly to back suplex. Kofi goes up and after blocking a superplex twice, a top rope cross body gets a close two. An Orton distraction prevents the Boom Drop but Kofi reverses a rollup into the pin on Punk and immediately kicks Orton’s head off for the final pin and a BIG pop.
Rating: B. This took a bit more time than it needed but the ending was perfect. It made Kofi look like a STAR….and then he lost the next month to Orton and was back in the midcard immediately after, but this was AWESOME. The other eliminations didn’t mean much and this would have been better as a 4-4 match with about three less minutes, but great ending and I was totally into the Kofi push at this point.
Smackdown World Title: Undertaker vs. Chris Jericho vs. Big Show
Jericho’s team won at Bragging Rights and Big Show turned on Raw at the same show to get this spot. Undertaker is defending and he’s the only person I’ll call champion in this match even though Jericho and Big Show have the Smackdown Tag Team Titles here. The challengers pound Undertaker into the corner with Show headbutting the champion a bit for good measure.
Undertaker comes back with a clothesline to send Show to the floor and goes after him instead of fighting Jericho in the ring. Odd decision but Undertaker is an odd guy most of the time. Undertaker fires away punches on the floor but Jericho pops up from out of nowhere and takes out the champ’s legs. Undertaker is stuck in the timekeeper’s area so the challengers lift him out of it to throw him back inside to hammer away.
Jericho misses a charge and Undertaker pounds away on Show before clotheslining him down. Show heads to the floor and Jericho gets beaten up for awhile but the big bald guy pulls the champ to the floor. Undertaker is all cool with that though and posts Show before getting crotched when attempting Old School on Jericho. Chris superplexes him down but Undertaker gets the knees up to block the Lionsault. Jericho counters the counter and puts on the Walls, but Show breaks it up with a chokeslam.
A chokeslam to Undertaker is countered into a DDT and all three guys are down. Jericho tries to cover both guys but can only get two before being launched to the floor by Big Show. Undertaker wins a slugout with Big Show and they both grab chokeslam grips, but it’s Jericho with a belt shot to take Show down, possibly by mistake. Undertaker loads up the Last Ride on Jericho but another belt shot to the head knocks out the champion for a good two seconds.
Jericho mocks the Undertaker for some reason and tries a Tombstone. Since he isn’t Kane at the moment, Undertaker easily counters, only to have Big Show knock him out. Jericho saves the pin and tries a Codebreaker on Big Show, who is like boy please. A knock out punch puts Jericho down as Undertaker is getting back to his feet. Show calls for the chokeslam but Show pulls him down into the Hell’s Gate for the submission to retain.
Rating: C+. This is one of those matches that went fine but you could have called most of the match the entire way through. Was there any doubt that Undertaker was going to keep the belt here and that the partners would turn on each other? That’s the problem with these kind of matches: they never take risks on the endings so it’s the same stuff over and over again.
The survivors of Team Miz (Miz, McIntyre and Sheamus) brag a bit and claim to be the future. Eh kind of.
Team Mickie James vs. Team Michelle McCool
Michelle McCool, Layla, Beth Phoenix, Jillian Hall, Alicia Fox
Mickie James, Kelly Kelly, Melina, Gail Kim, Eve Torres
Elimination rules. Michelle is Women’s Champion and Melina is Divas Champion. Layla and McCool are now an evil team called Laycool, Fox is a Diva with an attitude, Torres is a smart and polished woman and Gail is back from TNA but not doing much. Kelly and Layla get things going and it’s not pretty from the start. They are but the wrestling isn’t quite so smooth. Layla hits some dropkicks to the back but Kelly comes back with a legdrop to the back of the head to get the quick elimination.
Off to Gail vs. Michelle and it’s a quick Faithbreaker (Styles Clash) to eliminate Kim. Seriously it’s that fast. It’s time for Eve vs. Jillian with the singer taking over with a cartwheel splash. After some uninspired stuff, Eve pins Jillian with a top rope sunset flip and is immediately pinned herself after the Glam Slam. A second Glam Slam pins Kelly and it’s down to Mickie/Melina vs. Beth/Michelle/Alicia. Mickie comes in to fight Beth and after some forearms, a crucifix gets rid of Phoenix.
Alicia comes in next and things slow WAY down as Beth was the only girl in there that was going to be able to beat Mickie. A northern lights suplex with a GREAT bridge from Alicia (she could always do that so well) gets two but Mickie backflips up from the mat into a front chancery. It’s quickly broken up but it looked awesome. Mickie comes off the middle rope with a Thesz Press for the pin to make it 2-1.
Michelle comes in and stomps on Mickie before hooking a chinlock. Mickie comes back with a forearm to the face and both chicks are down. James can’t quite make the tag so Michelle slams her down for two. There’s the hot tag to Melina who goes nuts but gets no response. Michelle suplexes her down but she puts Melina over her shoulders and gets caught in a sunset flip for the final pin.
Rating: D-. This was worthless. As in there was no value to this whatsoever. The sex appeal is going down too as most of the girls are more covered up than they were in the previous years, and when you have bad wrestling with a lack of sex appeal, the Divas matches go way down in value. The crowd didn’t care at all here either.
Batista liked hurting Rey.
No recap video for the main event, but there’s no need for one. It’s the same story as the other World Title match minus the Bragging Rights parts.
Raw World Title: HHH vs. Shawn Michaels vs. John Cena
Cena is defending of course. The bell rings and Shawn superkicks HHH to the floor for a big surprise. Cena’s reaction is great as he never saw that coming and I don’t think most people did either. The replay screws it up by showing a good three inches between Shawn’s boot and HHH’s face, but that’s normal anymore. Cena tries a fast clothesline on Shawn but gets caught in a neckbreaker instead.
John comes back with a release fisherman’s suplex but Shawn chops away in the corner. Shawn gets kicked onto the top rope where Cena tries the AA but Shawn counters into something that most resembled a DDT for two. Shawn goes for the knee and the fans think Cena sucks. There’s a Figure Four on Cena but John turns it over to escape.
Back to their feet we go and Cena’s leg seems perfectly fine. He hits a pair of shoulder blocks but a third misses and he falls to the floor. Shawn loads up the announce table as HHH is still out cold apparently. Cena pops up to try an AA through the table but HHH saves, only to hit a big spinebuster to send Shawn through the table. Back inside we have HHH pounding away on Cena as Striker won’t stop talking. He goes on about how HHH is the ace of spades and all kinds of other terms that either go over most peoples’ heads or make little sense because he thinks he’s smarter than everyone else watching.
HHH hits a neckbreaker for two on Cena but a Pedigree attempt is countered into a slingshot into the corner. They slug it out with Cena taking over and hitting a shoulder to take over. There’s the ProtoBomb but Shawn sends him into the post to break up the Shuffle. It’s time for DX to explode and Shawn takes over early with an atomic drop followed by some chops. HHH comes back with a knee to the face but Shawn hits the forearms and nips up.
It doesn’t do much good though as he is immediately caught in the spinebuster, but like Cena he escapes the Pedigree. Shawn goes up but gets crotched by Cena who goes up as well, only to miss the top rope Fameasser. Shawn hits the top rope elbow on Cena but HHH sends Shawn to the floor. There’s the STF on HHH as Cena doesn’t seem interested in selling at all in this match. As HHH is about to tap, Shawn comes in and hooks the Crossface on Cena to break the hold.
Cena pulls up from that into an AA attempt but Michaels slips down the back, only to get caught in the STF. Shawn FINALLY gets the rope and pops up to superkick Cena. HHH charges in and takes another superkick, only to fall on Cena for a VERY close two. Cena hits an AA on HHH as Shawn gets back in after falling out after the two kicks. They both crawl for the cover and both get a two at the same time. All three guys try finishers on each other (including a piledriver attempt from Shawn) before Shawn superkicks HHH again but gets AA’d onto HHH for the pin to retain Cena’s title.
Rating: B. Good solid match here and WAY better than the previous one. Cena’s selling here was really surprising though as he’s not one to pull something like that. Other than that the finishers being used so often got a bit annoying, but the match felt like a big battle where anyone could have won, which couldn’t really be said about Show vs. Jericho vs. Undertaker. Good stuff here.
Cena signs some autographs for National Guard members to end the show.
Overall Rating: B-. This is a pretty good show but overall, it’s kind of underwhelming. The show mostly felt like it came and went and if the show happened that’s fine but if it didn’t exist that would be fine too. The triple threats didn’t work either although the main event was definitely a solid match. No need to see this, although it was good show if that makes sense.
Ratings Comparison
Team Miz vs. Team Morrison
Original: B
Redo: C+
Batista vs. Rey Mysterio
Original: C+
Redo: C+
Team Kingston vs. Team Orton
Original: B+
Redo: B
Undertaker vs. Chris Jericho vs. Big Show
Original: C+
Redo: C+
Team Mickie James vs. Team Michelle McCool
Original: D
Redo: D-
John Cena vs. HHH vs. Shawn Michaels
Original: C+
Redo: B
Overall Rating
Original: B-
Redo: B-
That’s probably about as close as this is going to get.
Here’s the original review if you’re interested:
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Survivor Series 2008
Date: November 23, 2008
Location: TD Banknorth Garden, Boston, Massachusetts
Attendance: 12,498
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Todd Grisham, Matt Striker, Jim Ross, Tazz
The other major story on the show is Team Orton vs. Team Batista. Randy Orton vs. Batista had always been a match WWE wanted to push on a big stage but this is about as high as they ever got. They would face each other at various other pay per views in singles matches, but none as high profile as this one. Let’s get to it.
The opening video is the exact same thing it’s been for two years. Literally, they’re the same clips before we get to the stuff about the main events.
JR and Taz talk about the Hardy issue and say that ABC and TMZ picked up the story. I seem to remember that being a lie.
Team HBK vs. Team JBL
Shawn Michaels, Rey Mysterio, Cryme Tyme, Great Khali
John Bradshaw Layfield, The Miz, John Morrison, Kane, MVP
Shawn and JBL are feuding over Shawn being broke and needing money form JBL, Cryme Tyme (Shad Gaspard and JTG, two thug characters) are feuding with Miz and Morrison, Kane has been hunting Mysterio and Khali and MVP (in the middle of a massive losing streak that would result in a face turn and the US Title) are there to fill out the lineups. MVP and Mysterio get things going as all of the commentators are talking at once.
Rey hits a quick hurricanrana and a clothesline for two before it’s off to JTG for a double dropkick. JTG hits a HARD right hand but MVP gets in a shot to the ribs and hits the Drive-By (running kick to the side of the head) for the elimination. Khali immediately comes in and chops MVP in the head for the elimination to tie things up.
Kane comes in for the staredown of the giants and Khali clotheslines him down with ease. Khali slugs him down and easily breaks up a chokeslam attempt. There’s the chop to the head and Rey climbs on Khali’s shoulders for the splash and another elimination. Off to Morrison who speeds things up. Mysterio hits a quick kick to the head and it’s time for Shad.
Now Cryme Tyme vs. Miz/Morrison was a feud ahead of its time: their internet shows got in an argument and a wrestling feud followed. Shad misses a charge into the corner and it’s off to Miz. Since Miz isn’t quite the worker he is at this point, it’s back to Morrison very quickly. Shad runs over both members of the tag team and powerslams Miz down before hitting another overhyped elbow. Miz pops back up and hits the Reality Check (backbreaker/neckbreaker combo) to eliminate Shad.
It’s off to Shawn who comes in via a slow, dramatic step. He gets to face the Miz, meaning that entrance was wasted. To the shock of almost everyone, Miz takes over and double teams with Morrison to work over Shawn’s back. JBL, the slimmed down version, comes in to pound away and drop an elbow for two. Back to Miz who pounds away at Shawn’s bad eye, busting it open again.
Morrison comes in again to crank on a headlock and send Shawn over the top. Naturally Shawn skins the cat to come back in, as he has for years. At least Morrison jumps him when Shawn gets back inside. A forearm puts Shawn down and Morrison nips up in a little jab at HBK. Morrison misses the top rope elbow and it’s a double tag to bring in Miz vs. Mysterio. Rey hits a springboard hurricanrana into the 619 and the top rope splash puts Miz out.
JBL comes in and hits a hard shoulder to take Mysterio down. The crowd is WAY into Rey here. The fans think JBL can’t wrestle. Off to Morrison with a European uppercut followed by a backbreaker. Rey gets in a kick to the face but it’s off to JBL to hook an abdominal stretch with the leg being cranked on at the same time. Once Rey escapes, JBL uses something you don’t often see: a big boot to the back of the head. Rey blocks a belly to back superplex and hits a moonsault press to put JBL down and bust open his lip. There’s the tag to Shawn who hits the forearm and nip up of his own to send Bradshaw to the floor.
Shawn dives out to take Bradshaw out and loads up the superkick to send JBL running away. With JBL running away from the kick, Shawn slides back in and beats the count by one second, meaning JBL is gone via a countout. Morrison tries to superkick Shawn but Shawn is like boy these boots are older than you and kicks Morrison’s head off for the final pin and 3-0 victory.
Rating: C. This was fine but the ending was kind of anti-climatic. They were trying to save the Shawn pin over JBL which was a good idea as they would have a solid feud in the next few months which resulted in Shawn being JBL’s lackey because Shawn was poor. The guys other than the captains in this didn’t do much of note but that’s kind of the idea behind a match like this. Not bad but nothing great either.
HHH doesn’t think he needs to give his opinion on the Jeff Hardy situation. Either way, Hardy will be back. Tonight it’s going to be him vs. Kozlov and HHH promises to give the Russian his first defeat.
Team Raw vs. Team Smackdown
Raw: Beth Phoenix, Mickie James, Kelly Kelly, Candice Michelle, Jillian Hall
Smackdown: Michelle McCool, Victoria, Maria, Maryse, Natalya
Candice is a model who wasn’t horrible in the ring, Maryse is a French Canadian bombshell and Natalya is a member of the Hart Family. Beth is the captain of Team Raw (and is dating Santino Marella) and McCool is captain of Team Smackdown. They’re also Women’s and Divas Champions respectively. For the sake of simplicity, only Michelle McCool will be referred to as Michelle. Beth and Michelle start things off with Beth controlling via a top wristlock. Michelle uses some decent chain wrestling to set up a dropkick to send Beth backwards a bit.
Maryse tags herself in and gets in a brawl with her own partner Michelle. Team Raw: “LET THEM FIGHT!” Good thinking. After the brawl is broken up, it’s Beth vs. Maria with Maria avoiding a charge and hitting a slow motion headscissors. Off to Kelly vs. Maria and hopefully this doesn’t last long. Victoria tags herself in and gets caught in a hurricanrana by Kelly for the pin. Kelly tries the same thing on Maryse for two so Maryse hits a backbreaker and gets the pin as well.
It’s 4-4 now and Mickie comes in while swearing a bit. A Thesz Press puts Maryse down and it’s off to Michelle again. They try to bridge into a backslide, fail miserably, and try again to a standoff. McCool hits a Russian legsweep for two and Mickie hits a clothesline for the same. Maria’s save hits McCool by mistake, allowing Mickie to hit the jumping DDT and pin Michelle. Mickie gets in an argument with Beth and gets rolled up by Maryse to tie it right back up.
Off to Candice vs. Natalya and they trade some rollups for two. Natalya busts out a Sharpshooter (it is the Survivor Series after all) but Jillian makes the save. Candice hits a spear for a quick pin on Natalya and it’s 3-2 with Jillian, Beth and Candice vs. Maria and Maryse.
It’s Jillian vs. Maria with Jillian getting two off a Samoan Drop. Maria grabs a quick victory roll to eliminate Jillian and ten seconds later, Candice hits a northern lights suplex to put Maria out. Maryse hooks an inverted figure four on Candice and we’re down to one on one. Maryse gets in a few shots and a rollup but the Glam Slam (double chickenwing slam) gives Beth the final pin very quickly.
Rating: D. As decent as last year’s was, this felt like your traditional Divas match. You had some decent workers but most of the girls are models who are there because of how they look in swimsuits. I’ve seen worse matches and the right choice was the survivor, but this just didn’t work for the most part.
Matt Hardy says that Jeff was hit in the back of the head with a blunt object, ending any drug speculation.
We recap Undertaker vs. Big Show. Show isn’t scared of Undertaker so he’ll win the casket match tonight.
Undertaker vs. Big Show
Casket match and the casket gets the full druid entrance. I wonder if those guys hang out at catering after this. They have a nice casket this year too instead of the normally generic ones. Show took all of 2007 off and lost a ton of weight so he’s still kind of slim here. Well slim for him that is. I don’t think the bell rang but Show starts throwing punches anyway. One misses though and Undertaker tries to dump him into the casket to no avail.
They head to the floor and Undertaker’s headbutt has no effect. Show pounds away at the ribs and rams Undertaker face first into the announce table to daze the smaller giant. The announce table gets loaded up but Show headbutts him instead of putting Undertaker on the table. Undertaker grabs one of those big monitors WWE uses and bashes Show’s head in a few times with it. A BIG leg to put Show through the table in the huge spot of the match.
They slowly start heading back to the casket but take a detour into the ring instead. Old School is countered and things slow down again. There’s a side slam from Show as the crowd is a lot less interested than they were when Undertaker was on offense. The casket it opened and Undertaker is put inside but Show has to close the casket himself.
Since Show won’t close the lid, Undertaker comes back with a bunch of punches and the jumping clothesline. Show hits a big elbow in the corner to slow down Undertaker (and the crowd) again. For some reason Show loads up a Vader Bomb when Undertaker is half up and gets chokeslammed down.
The casket is opened again and a big boot to the side of Show’s head knocks him inside, but Show blocks the lid from being shut again. Back in and Show hits the chokeslam….then destroys the casket. Show starts walking away and there’s a wall of fire to stop him from leaving. Well of course there is. Undertaker goes after him and gets punched down again, but here are more druids with another casket.
Show punches Undertaker a bit more and stands the casket up so he can ram Undertaker into it and knock both of them down. The casket is stood up again but it’s open this time. Undertaker punches Show to the edge of the stage before whipping Show into the casket, causing it to fall and shut to give Undertaker the win.
Rating: D. This is considered a horrible casket match by some people but it’s really not that bad. It’s certainly a bad match but the ending was kind of creative and what are you expecting from Undertaker vs. Big Show? They’re going to hit each other a lot and it’s going to be slow, so why do people act surprised when any match with either of these two or Kane is the same formula? Not a good match but it’s definitely not terrible.
Carlito and Primo (cousins) hit on the Bellas but can’t tell them apart. In something I never thought I’d have to say again, the Gobbledygooker pops up and the Colons think it’s Charlie Haas, but of course he pops up in the room and the Gooker is played by the Boogeyman. This would be another pointless segment.
Randy Orton doesn’t want to be team captain but his team will win anyway. He implies Cody is the weak link of the team. Cody says that if Randy is eliminated first, it’s addition by subtraction. The team has to hold them apart.
Team Orton vs. Team Batista
Randy Orton, Mark Henry, William Regal, Cody Rhodes, Shelton Benjamin
Batista, Kofi Kingston, CM Punk, R-Truth, Matt Hardy
Cody is being mentored by Orton in a group called Legacy, Shelton is US Champion, Matt is ECW Champion and Punk/Kofi are Raw Tag Team Champions. Orton cost Punk the Raw World Title back in October, Hardy and Henry are feuding over the ECW Title, Truth is chasing Shelton’s Title and Regal has been helping Orton against Batista. This is quite the intricate match for a change.
Punk immediately charges at Regal and hits the GTS for the elimination in about ten seconds. Shelton gets a very fast two on Punk before pounding away on his back. Off to Kofi who grabs a front facelock. Kofi is even more over here than usual as he went to college in Boston. Kofi tries a monkey flip but Shelton lands on his feet and brings in Henry to pound away slowly.
Henry apparently gets tired after a few seconds so here’s Cody. Matt comes in, does nothing of note, and tags in Truth who pounds away. Striker talks about what a killing Truth is making as we can hear a lot of spots being called here tonight. I don’t know if the ring is mic’d loudly or what but you can hear all kinds of stuff here. Batista comes in and everybody runs until it’s only Cody left to face him. Rhodes quickly tags out to Shelton but Batista takes him down with ease and gets two via a powerslam. Off to Matt vs. Randy as things speed up. A bulldog gets two for Matt but a moonsault misses.
It’s off to Henry who lost the ECW Title to Hardy a few months ago. Cody comes in and chokes a bit but there’s the double tag to Truth vs. Shelton. A victory roll gets two for Truth and he does his backflip into the splits spot. The spinning forearm misses completely and Paydirt (a jumping downward spiral) gets the pin for Shelton. Kofi immediately comes in with a springboard cross body for two and a dropkick to put Shelton down.
The Boom Drop gets another two for Kofi but Henry blasts Kofi in the back of the head. Henry comes in legally now for more quick pounding and it’s finally off to Orton. Orton does his really slow stomp but the knee drop misses. Randy drapes him over the top rope and hits the hanging DDT for the elimination. Punk is immediately waiting on Orton, who gets beaten up for a few moments but gets in a rake to the eyes and tags out to Cody.
Rhodes works on the arm for a bit but gets caught by the knee and bulldog combo for two. Punk goes up but Manu (the other member of Legacy who didn’t last long) distracts him long enough for Cody to shove him off the top. A DDT eliminates Punk quickly and we’re down to 4-2 with Batista/Matt vs. Orton/Cody/Henry/Benjamin. Matt comes in and hits a quick Side Effect for two on Rhodes but it’s quickly back to Henry. Matt hits an elbow to the back of Henry’s head and manages to pull off the Side Effect for two. That’s about it for Hardy as the World’s Strongest Slam takes him out, leaving Batista all alone.
Batista immediately spears down Henry to make it 3-1 as Shelton comes in. Benjamin gets caught in a spinebuster almost immediately and the Batista Bomb gets is down to 2-1. Cody comes in and peppers Batista with some right hands before charging into a boot. Batista powerslams Rhodes down and says Orton is next. Batista hits the Bomb on Rhodes but Randy made a blind tag while Cody was in the air. The RKO gets the elimination and win for Rhodes and Orton.
Rating: B. This was a kind of throwback to the old school Survivor Series matches where the numbers finally caught up with the big face and he got beat. Orton vs. Batista was one of the big matches that WWE never really got to do on the scale I think they were hoping for. They would have a long match next month at Armageddon but that’s hardly the second main event at Wrestlemania which they were capable of having. Still though, good stuff here and the best match of the night by far.
Kozlov says he’ll win.
Hardy is officially out of the title match tonight.
The recap video is pretty pointless now because the video is mostly about Jeff. Kozlov is here because HHH wanted to have some big epic match with him that no one but him was interested in. Jeff is here because he keeps getting so close to winning the title so EVIL Vickie wouldn’t let him in the match. Jeff invaded the contract signing and beat up a lot of people until he was put in the match.
Smackdown World Title: Vladimir Kozlov vs. HHH
HHH is defending. After the big match intros we’re ready to go. The fans chant USA of course and for once it’s actually appropriate. Kozlov, the amateur wrestler/combat sports expert, takes it to the mat with amateur stuff. Now remember that, because it’ll become important later. HHH gets on the mat with him and hooks a headlock. The fans now chant boring as we hit a standoff. Now they want Hardy.
They trade arm holds on the mat and then trade even more arm holds on the same mat. Back up and HHH hits the high knee and a facebuster followed by the DDT for no cover. The fans chant for TNA before HHH hits the spinebuster. Kozlov counters the Pedigree and hits the headbutt to the chest to take HHH down. Vladimir sends HHH into the corner and out to the floor where very little happens.
Back in and a fall away slam gets two for the challenger and he fires some shoulders to the ribs. A powerslam gets another two and it’s off to a body grip to slow things down even more. Kozlov hits a pair of backbreakers for two and it’s back to that grip. HHH comes back with some right hands but gets powerslammed down for another two. A comeback by HHH is countered into a belly to belly as Taz says Kozlov is going to win, further dooming him to lose. HHH hits a Pedigree out of nowhere and here’s Smackdown GM Vickie Guerrero.
She says he’s here and makes it a triple threat, with the third man being the returning Edge. Edge does the psycho eyes on the way to the ring and I think a cameraman fell off the ramp as he was filming. Edge spears down HHH and here’s Jeff Hardy to destroy the Canadian. His chair shot hits HHH though, allowing Edge to steal the pin and the title.
Rating: D. There’s a lot to say here. First and foremost, as usual I disagree with anyone who said this was the worst match of the year. It’s arguably not even the worst match of the show, but think about this for a minute: are you telling me there isn’t some terrible Divas match somewhere in the year worse than this? Or that Honky Tonk Man vs. Santino Marella at Cyber Sunday was indeed better?
This match was indeed bad, but let’s think about this for a minute. Kozlov is supposed to be a combat sports expert and an amateur wrestler. So what did he do? He wrestled like his character was supposed to. Now was it boring? Absolutely. Was it a REALLY stupid move to put him in a World Title match? Absolutely. Were the fans interested? Not at all. If you want proof, back at Cyber Sunday the options for the title match were HHH vs. either guy, or a triple threat. The results were as follows:
Hardy – 57%
Triple Threat – 38%
Kozlov – 5%
Based on that alone, it’s clear that almost no one wanted to see HHH vs. Kozlov one on one. The interest just wasn’t there, so they booked a triple threat instead which there was interest in. Then they screw the fans out of their money by taking Jeff out of the match because of whatever their reasoning was. Then they flip the fans off AGAIN by having Hardy run in at the end. Hardy would pin Edge in another triple threat the next month to win the title in a shocker. Why this match didn’t happen here is beyond me, but again it’s screwing the fans out of what was advertised until the night before the show.
At the end of the day though, no one bought Kozlov as a real threat to the title. The guy just wasn’t going to be WWE Champion with the response he got, which is why Hardy was the interesting factor in this match. Without him, you have twelve minutes of your time being wasted until the ending, which should have been Hardy. Anyway, nothing to see here but it’s not the worst match of the year.
We recap Jericho vs. Cena. Jericho snuck into the Championship Scramble match last month at Unforgiven and stole the World Title while Cena was on the shelf. Tonight, Cena returns from a neck injury to try and get his title back. In his hometown. Against a guy that has literally only beaten him once. And we’re supposed to expect Jericho to have a chance because we’re supposed to ignore all that stuff.
Raw World Title: Chris Jericho vs. John Cena
Jericho is defending of course. Cena almost immediately tries the FU but Jericho bails to the apron. Jericho comes back with a headlock which works on the neck followed by a shoulder block to take Cena to the floor. John holds his neck a lot and looks shaken. Back in and Cena pounds away in the corner as they’re hitting hard but the pace of the match is pretty slow if that makes sense. Jericho takes over and things continue to go slowly.
Cena comes back with the Throwback and goes up for the Fameasser, only to come down because that’s the move that hurt his neck in the first place. Jericho takes over again and things go slowly. A kick to the side of Cena’s head puts him on the floor for a nine count. Back in and Cena slugs away but gets sent right back to the floor. Jericho throws him into the steps and heads back in for a neck crank.
After the hold is broken, it’s time for more choking followed by a full nelson. The hold lasts almost a minute and a half but Cena blocks the bulldog. A shoulder puts Jericho down but the second shoulder connects. Jericho misses the Lionsault but the Shuffle is countered into the Liontamer (kneeling Walls of Jericho)! He hasn’t used that in years but it looks awesome. Cena escapes the hold so Jericho puts on the regular Boston Crab instead. Cena, after being in the hold over a minute straight, grabs the rope to escape. Back up and Cena hits an FU out of nowhere but can’t follow up.
Both guys head up to the top with Cena slamming him to the mat, followed up by the top rope Fameasser. Cena is all fired up now but Jericho breaks up the FU and hits a Codebreaker for a delayed two. Jericho takes over and hits a clothesline followed by an EVIL smirk. He smirks a bit too much though and Cena grabs the STFU. Cena has to try to pull the hold back to the middle of the ring and Jericho kicks him away. The champ tries a small package but Cena pulls him up into the FU for the pin and the title.
Rating: C+. The match itself was fine but there was less drama in this than in a Donald Duck cartoon. At the end of the day, Cena does not lose to Jericho and he does not tap out no matter what. The wrestling was fine and it told a story and all that jazz, but I’d rather have a main event where I wasn’t sure what was going to happen than a match being designed for Cena to have everything come together and win and then everything coming together to win.
Cena celebrates to end the show.
Overall Rating: D+. I don’t know if it’s because I’ve been doing so many of these lately, but this wasn’t the most interesting show in the world. It was dull at times and almost felt like a chore to sit through. The first hour or so is WAY worse than the rest of the show, but even the last two thirds aren’t all that great. This didn’t work that well and it’s not something I want to see again.
Ratings Comparison
Team HBK vs. Team JBL
Original: B+
Redo: C
Team Raw vs. Team Smackdown
Original: D-
Redo: D
Undertaker vs. Big Show
Original: D+
Redo: D
Team Orton vs. Team Batista
Original: C-
Redo: B
Edge vs. HHH vs. Vladimir Kozlov
Original: D+
Redo: D
John Cena vs. Chris Jericho
Original: B
Redo: C+
Overall Rating
Original: C-
Redo: D+
I’ve flipped on the two male Survivor Series matches but other than that it’s about the same.
Here’s the original review if you’re interested:
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Survivor Series 2007
Date: November 18, 2007
Location: American Airlines Arena, Miami, Florida
Attendance: 12,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross, Tazz, Joey Styles
The company has finally settled down to the point where major changes are mostly done. The three rosters are working well enough and talent is moving from show to show fast enough to keep things interesting. There has however been one change, though it’s more the end of an experiment: all pay per views are now done by all brands, meaning there are no more Raw or Smackdown pay per views. Let’s get to it.
The opening video talks about how this started twenty years ago, as you would expect it to. It also talks about the main event matches tonight, as you would expect it to as well.
ECW Title: CM Punk vs. John Morrison vs. The Miz
Punk is defending and Miz (a reality TV star turned wrestler) and Morrison (formerly Johnny Nitro) are Smackdown Tag Team Champions. The team of course jumps CM at the same time because one on one, neither have a chance to beat Punk. Punk kicks the tar out of Miz’s head and gets a quick two on Morrison. Both challengers are sent to the floor where Punk takes both of them out with a suicide dive. Back in and Punk gets caught in a double suplex after the springboard clothesline fails.
Miz and Morrison double team Punk but Miz is the first of the heels to go extra heel, dumping Morrison out to the floor. He hooks a chinlock on Punk but has to let go to knock Morrison back to the outside. Punk kicks Miz in the head but Morrison comes back in with a backbreaker to CM followed by a cobra clutch (called a Japanese sleeper by Joey Styles).
Miz pulls Punk to the floor and rams him into the concrete to get us down to the challengers fighting. Morrison sends him into the corner chest first and hits the yet to be named Starship Pain for two. Punk comes back in and hurricanranas Morrison off the top into a powerbomb from Miz in a SWEET looking move. That only gets two but it got a BIG reaction from the crowd.
With Morrison pretty much dead, Punk kicks Miz in the face for two and hits the knee/bulldog combo for the same. Punk hits a backbreaker on Miz but Morrison grabs a rollup and trunks on the champ for two. Morrison escapes the GTS but gets knocked to the floor, allowing Punk to hit the GTS on Miz for the pin to retain.
Rating: C. Other than that hurricanrana/powerbomb spot, this was only ok. Punk had to carry the whole thing but you could see something special in Miz. It’s a little easier to see it now, but some people thought Miz would be the bigger deal because of this match. I’m not sure if I’d agree based on this match, but Miz did indeed look better than Morrison here. This was a pretty good choice for an opener, but the execution wasn’t great because Punk didn’t have enough to work with.
We recap MVP turning on Matt Hardy and taking out his knee. They had been partners for a long while before this but everyone thought MVP was evil the whole time, and this was the not very shocking turn.
MVP says that Matt won’t be competing tonight because he needs crutches to get by. That doesn’t surprise MVP, because Matt has always needed a crutch, be it either Jeff or MVP. Oh and he’s better than Matt.
Mickie James/Maria/Torrie Wilson/Michelle McCool/Kelly Kelly vs. Beth Phoenix/Melina/Jillian Hall/Victoria/Layla
One fall to a finish here and Beth is Women’s Champion. Maria is a gorgeous ditzy redhead, Torrie is a bombshell, McCool is a pretty blonde, Phoenix is a very strong woman, Jillian is ditzy as well and Layla is a British woman who dances a lot. The Divas Title doesn’t exist yet which is how things should have stayed. Melina falls off the apron during her splits entrance which is worth a chuckle. The second attempt works and thankfully she’s smiling after screwing it up.
Victoria and Michelle start things off with Michelle taking over with a headlock. A big boot puts Victoria (later Tara in TNA) down and it’s off to Torrie who isn’t very good in the ring. Victoria kills her mostly dead with a side slam and it’s off to Layla who is so bad here that she can’t even beat up Torrie. Kelly and Jillian come in and Jillian tries to scream a bit, only to get rolled up for two.
Thankfully Beth comes in to flatten Maria before handing it right back to Layla. Actually make that Melina, who misses a charge at Maria and crotches herself, allowing for the hot tag to Mickie. James beats up everyone in sight, has her partners take out Beth, and hits the Long Kiss Goodnight (spinning kick to the face after a kiss) on Melina for the pin.
Rating: D. Yes, the match sucked. Yes, most of the women in this are horrible wrestlers. Yes, if you’re complaining about these things, you’re missing the point. This was pure fan service as you had ten girls in either tight or barely there outfits and one hot woman kicking another hot woman in the head. If you’re looking for a wrestling match here, you’re in the wrong place.
Coach and Regal are in the back looking smug. Hornswoggle, who is Vince’s son at this point, is pacing very nervously. Remember that he faces Khali tonight.
Orton says history isn’t going to be made tonight. He’s going to beat Shawn because if Shawn uses the superkick, Shawn loses the match.
Shawn is here for revenge tonight because Orton has tried to hurt him and take his livelihood. Therefore tonight, Shawn is going to take the title.
Raw Tag Team Titles: Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch vs. Hardcore Holly/Cody Rhodes
Cade and Murdoch (two rednecks) are defending. Rhodes (Dusty’s son) is brand new at this point and spent weeks getting beaten up by Holly before Holly respected him enough to team with him. Cody and Cade start things off with the rookie getting hiptossed down. The crowd pretty much died as soon as the bell rang, which should tell you about the tag team situation at the time as these are the best Raw had for their belts.
Off to the very redneck Murdoch who chops away but gets caught in a headlock. Yeah Cody didn’t quite get anywhere as a worker for a long time. Holly comes in and is immediately beaten down by Cade. The crowd is reacting a bit so it’s not totally dead but it’s nothing special. The heels are sent into each other and fall out to the floor as Holly takes over. We actually get a HOLLY chant for the only time I can ever remember.
A rollup gets two for Hardcore and it’s off to Murdoch via a blind tag. Holly gets his head kicked off and things slow back down again. The champs tag in and out a lot before Cade picks up Murdoch to drop him down with a legdrop for two. We hit the chinlock on Holly which goes nowhere so Holly suplexes Trevor down. Cade misses an elbow drop but Holly still can’t tag out.
Cade tries that dropping Murdoch into a legdrop move again but as almost always is the case, it doesn’t work this time. Warm tag brings in Cody who hits a missile dropkick on Lance for two. Holly and Cade fall to the floor and Murdoch hits something resembling a Canadian Destroyer (flip piledriver, though this was much more like a sunset flip than a piledriver) to retain.
Rating: C-. Another so-so match here but at the end of the day, it’s Hardcore Holly and a rookie Cody Rhodes vs. Lance Cade and Trevor Murdoch. That’s only going to take you so far as the fans aren’t going to care about it for the most part. I don’t get why they didn’t change the titles here as Holly and Rhodes would get the belts in a month (and hold them for SIX MONTHS) anyway.
The announcers explain the concept of a Survivor Series match to the uninitiated. That’s something you hardly ever see anymore: a basic explanation of WHAT IS GOING ON. Sometimes you need to slow things down a bit and tell people how things work. If you’re flipping through the channels and see something flashy like wrestling, you’re likely to stop but if you have no idea what’s going on, you’re not likely to stay. Gorilla Monsoon was a master at doing this.
Team HHH isn’t worried about being down 5-4 coming into the match (Matt Hardy was hurt) but Kane says he isn’t an underdog. We recap the Katie Vick angle (HHH: “Uh…..yeah sorry about that.” If you don’t know what this is, be glad and keep it that way.) and Jeff reminds HHH that he put him in the hospital. HHH is sorry about that too and says tonight they can unite in the idea of doing something terrible to someone else.
Team HHH vs. Team Umaga
HHH, Kane, Jeff Hardy, Rey Mysterio
Umaga, Mr. Kennedy, MVP, Finlay, Big Daddy V
Big Daddy V is a much fatter Mabel. Kennedy’s mic doesn’t work for the live intro at first so we can only hear the ending. Jeff is Intercontinental Champion and MVP is US Champion. Remember that we’re starting at 5-4 because Matt is gone. Rey and Kennedy get things going with Kennedy using a rare power advantage to take over. Kennedy pounds in the corner but gets caught in a sunset bomb before it’s off to Jeff for a BIG pop. Rey and Jeff combine for some Poetry in Motion and Kennedy is in trouble.
Scratch that trouble as Jeff runs into an elbow (JBL: “That’ll knock the purple out of your hair!”) and it’s off to MVP. MVP limps a bit which apparently is a fake injury. Or maybe he’s making fun of Matt Hardy. Off to the 550lb Big Daddy V who uses his big fat man offense on Jeff, before stupidly throwing Jeff to the corner for a tag to Kane.
V almost immediately belly to belly suplexes Kane down for two but Kane comes back with some clotheslines in the corner. A top rope clothesline puts V down again but Kane has to chokeslam Finlay. V hits a Samoan Drop and a big elbow on Kane for the upset elimination. HHH comes in and hits the facebuster on the monster but gets caught by a clothesline to shift the momentum right back.
We get the match that everyone is looking forward to in HHH vs. Umaga and the fans don’t react at all. Umaga takes him down with a belly to belly of his own and a headbutt has HHH in trouble. Umaga misses a middle rope headbutt and there’s the hot tag to Rey. Rey pounds away but almost immediately gets knocked down by the other monster. Mysterio goes after the leg but a hurricanrana is just a bad idea. Actually it isn’t as he swings Umaga into the 619, followed by a springboard seated senton for two. Umaga unleashes a BIG SAMOAN SCREAM and hits a spinning release Rock Bottom and the Spike to eliminate Rey.
So it’s all five villains vs. Jeff and HHH, and it’s not that the two superheroes are likely to run through all five and win or anything like that of course. Jeff vs. Kennedy starts things off and Hardy is in trouble quickly. I don’t think Jeff really gets going until he looks like he’s been thrown out of a building though. Jeff comes back with a dropkick but the slingshot dropkick in the corner misses due to an MVP assist. Cole talks about how that’s the second time MVP has caused that move to miss in three days. JBL: “Maybe MVP is just smarter than the Hardys.”
Off to MVP who hooks a chinlock on Jeff which goes on for a while. Jeff fights up but gets gets caught in a fireman’s carry drop. MVP starts talking trash to the fans and walks into a Twist of Fate to make it 4-2. Kennedy is in next and walks into an enziguri, which allows for the tag off to HHH. A high knee sets up a clothesline for two for HHH followed by a spinebuster. HHH sees the human whale known as Big Daddy V coming and avoids an elbow which crushes Kennedy and allows HHH to make it 3-2.
V gets both superheroes on the floor and crushes Hardy against the post to put him down for awhile. Back in the ring HHH and Hardy avoid a charge in the corner and hit a double DDT on V for the elimination. I’ve always wondered how basic moves when a monster is fresh is enough to eliminate them. These guys have no stamina at all.
It’s HHH/Jeff vs. Finlay/Umaga if you’re keeping track. Finlay comes in and pounds away on HHH while JBL talks about how great Finlay is. Finlay goes to the middle rope and jumps into HHH’s boot to put both guys down. Hot tag brings in Jeff for a hard Irish whip into the corner and the slingshot dropkick for two. Jeff goes to the apron and is immediately drilled by Umaga to give the evil foreigners control again. Finlay whips Jeff into the corner but gets caught by a Whisper in the Wind. A mule kick staggers Umaga and there’s the hot tag to HHH to meet Finlay. The high knee puts Finlay down and there’s a spinebuster to follow it up.
The Pedigree is loaded up but Umaga kicks HHH’s head off to break it up. The Celtic Cross (White Noise) is escaped and there’s the Pedigree to make it 2-1. Umaga DESTROYS HHH in the corner but the running attack misses by a mile. The Pedigree and Swanton Bomb connect and we’re done.
Rating: B-. The match was pretty fun stuff but once we got down to 5-2, it was a matter of guessing what order the five were going out in rather than who was going to win. That being said, it’s probably the right move as HHH would move on from Umaga after this and take to feud with Orton. That feud would follow Hardy vs. Orton at the Rumble, so this was definitely a launching pad for the two survivors back to the main event.
Shaquille O’Neal is here.
Hornswoggle is still nervous in the back. Tonight’s match is another of those tough love things from Vince. Speaking of the boss, he comes in and Hornswoggle immediately hugs his leg. This is one of those things that I think WWE missed about Hornswoggle: he acts like a child.
Allow me to lose control for a second. HE HAS A FULL BEARD! THE GUY IS IN HIS TWENTIES! HORNSWOGGLE IS NOT A CHIL……why am I annoyed by this? It’s Hornswoggle. Vince says he made this match because Hornswoggle is a McMahon and therefore has to rise to the occasion. He compares this to his battles with Turner and the US government. Vince gives him a pep talk and Hornswoggle is ready.
Here’s Shane McMahon to the arena, rocking a suit. Shane introduces Vince and apparently they’ll be in the corner of Hornswoggle tonight. Well that’s nice of them. JBL says this is going to be Biblical. Cole: “This isn’t the Bible.”
Hornswoggle vs. Great Khali
Runjin Singh, Khali’s manager, says we should have the wrestlers get together for the reading of the rules. This results in Singh talking over the referee as he translates. The fans want Shaq (Shaquille O’Neal) but they get the bell instead. The fans realize Shaq is here and Vince tells him to sit down. Vince tells the fans he doesn’t care what they want.
Hornswoggle takes off his jacket and hat and kicks Singh in the face. He kicks at the legs of Khali…and wisely runs away. Singh runs his mouth some more and gets GREEN MIST IN THE FACE! Hornswoggle dives on Singh and pounds away before hiding from Khali under the ring. The small guy finds that Irish club and calls Khali in but the stick is of course caught. Khali kicks him down but before the Vice Grip can go on, Finlay runs in for the save and face turn.
Rating: D-. Well, there was at least a purpose so it’s not a total failure. It should have been on Raw though and the whole story really wasn’t the most entertaining. At the end of the day, this is a big comedy angle designed to get……actually I’m not sure who this is designed to get over. Not that it worked anyway but some clarification would be nice.
Finlay beats up Singh and Khali with the club. It would eventually be revealed that Finlay was Hornswoggle’s father, but I’m not quite sure why Vince agreed to the whole thing in storyline.
Alfonso Soriano, a baseball player, is here.
We recap Shawn vs. Orton. Shawn had the title won in a previous match but Orton intentionally got himself disqualified and then punted Shawn to the shelf for a few months. Shawn admitted he wanted revenge but Vince banned the superkick for no apparent reason other than being evil.
Raw World Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Randy Orton
Orton is defending, if Orton gets DQ’ed the title changes, Shawn can get no more shots if he loses, and if Shawn attempts to use the Superkick, he loses the match. Shawn almost immediately goes to the cravate and Orton spends nearly two minutes trying to fight out of it. Now that’s a (European) headlock. Orton escapes in the corner and Shawn raises his leg for the kick but the referee says that wasn’t an attempt. It’s going to be one of those referees I guess.
Orton drops down as Shawn runs the ropes so Shawn gets on Randy’s back and chokes away. The hold switches to a front facelock as they’re spending a lot of time in holds so far. Randy finally gets to the floor where Shawn fakes diving over the top so he can dropkick him through the ropes before faking ANOTHER dive and hitting an Asai moonsault in a good sequence. Back in and Orton rolls through a crossbody for two before hitting an uppercut to take over.
Shawn fights up and throws on the required Sharpshooter until Orton finally makes the rope. Orton comes back with a thumb to the eye and snaps Shawn across the top rope to take over. The Elevated DDT hits for two. It’s off to a chinlock by Orton as the hold marathon continues. It’s not boring or bad but it’s a very different way of going about a match.
Shawn fights back but walks into a dropkick for two. He catches another dropkick in mid air and slams Randy down a few times before hitting the top rope elbow for two. By instinct, Shawn tunes up the band but he fakes Orton out by making him duck and grabs a rollup for two. Brilliant psychology there.
In a move I was shocked to see at the time, Shawn puts on a Crossface. Remember that this is just five months after Benoit so that’s not a move you would have expected to see here. Orton finally gets a leg over the rope and Shawn looks spent from that not working. He tries the hold again but Randy clotheslines his head off for two. Orton hits the backbreaker and loads up the same Punt which kept Shawn out for five months.
Randy gets a running start but Shawn grabs an ankle lock with a grapevine to make Orton scream. Orton uses the good leg to kick Shawn away and break the hold. Why don’t more people do that to Angle? Michaels tries the Figure Four but Orton kicks him into the post. Shawn pulls up the foot for the kick but since he has to stop, Orton hits the RKO for the pin to retain the title.
Rating: B. I was digging the psychology here as Shawn had to come up with all kinds of ways to beat Orton instead of the superkick. It says a lot about Shawn that the only way they could have Orton be able to hang in a fight with him was to take away Shawn’s big move. Orton would hold the title for another five months or so until HHH (of course) took it away from him.
Orton demands that Shawn say Orton is the future but Shawn is pretty out of it. Not out of it enough though as there’s the superkick we were waiting on.
Cole is talking about the main event and SAVE US. For those of you unfamiliar, this was a series of videos that popped up at random on shows with what looked like the Matrix announcing that someone was coming to SAVE US. It would be revealed the next night that it was the return of Chris Jericho.
The Cell is lowered.
We recap Batista vs. Undertaker. Batista lost the belt to Undertaker at Wrestlemania and they feuded for the title on a few PPVs. After a cage match on Smackdown, Edge cashed in the MITB contract and won the title from Undertaker. Later, Edge was hurt and had to vacate the belt, which was won by Khali. Batista eventually beat Khali for the belt and Undertaker came back to challenge him for it.
They fought at Cyber Sunday with Batista winning, which made them 1-1 with a few draws. Undertaker wanted one more match and Batista was perfectly cool with that, but Undertaker wanted it in the Cell. See how that worked? It was a natural progression with the Cell being the FINAL match between them (one on one at least). That’s a logical progression that you rarely get anymore.
Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. Undertaker
Batista is defending. Undertaker charges to start and is caught in a headlock before getting run over by Big Dave. Undertaker shrugs it off and tries an early chokeslam but Batista fights out of it. This is one of those feuds where you don’t bother with the basic stuff and go with the big power moves because that’s all that’s going to have any effect. Undertaker clotheslines him down and pounds away in the corner. We’re still in the early going here so this doesn’t mean a lot yet.
The Snake Eyes and big boot get two for Undertaker and it’s already chair time. Batista hits a BIG spear to take Undertaker down and gets the chair. That goes badly for the champ as Undertaker kicks the chair back into his face and gets two off a clothesline. They head outside and Undertaker keeps control with a solid shot into the steps. Batista gets raked against the Cell and there’s the legdrop on the apron.
To stay on the throat, Undertaker puts the chair over Batista’s throat and slams the bottom of the chair into the steps. The champ is bleeding from the mouth now. Back in and Undertaker covers by driving a forearm into the throat. Undertaker is kind of the heel in this match, which says A LOT about how over Batista was here. Back in, Undertaker loads up Old School but Batista catches him in the spinebuster in a cool counter.
They slug it out and Batista takes over with a clothesline that gets two. Batista hits a powerslam and takes it back to the floor. They’ve done a solid job here of having both guys dominate for a long stretch which usually works well for a big time match. Undertaker whips Batista into the Cell to take over again so maybe what I just said is nonsense. Batista gets rammed head first into the steel and things are starting to pick up.
A chair shot keeps Batista down and the champ is cut open on the forehead. Batista blocks Old School again and hits a superplex to put both guys down. As Batista is crawling over to him, the Dead Man tries the Hell’s Gate (triangle choke) but it’s not on full. Batista makes the rope and heads to the floor for a breather, setting up the Undertaker Dive over the top rope.
Undertaker picks up the steps and tries to ram Batista with them, but the champ pulls himself up using the cage and kicks them back into Undertaker’s face. Batista picks up the steps and just rams Undertaker in the head with them four or five times to draw blood. Back in and Batista does the stupid thing of punching Undertaker in the corner and gets a Last Ride for his efforts. That only gets two and the pop isn’t huge from the crowd. They know we’re getting A LOT of finishers before a pin here.
There’s a chokeslam but it only gets two. The Tombstone is countered into a spinebuster for two and there’s another spinebuster for good measure. It’s table time and Batista easily powerbombs him through it….for two. There’s the pop from the crowd on the kickout that we were looking for. Now the Animal loads up the steps but Undertaker backdrops him onto said steps for two. The Tombstone hits….for two again, making Batista one of a handful of people to survive the Last Ride, Tombstone and a chokeslam.
Undertaker KILLS Batista with a Tombstone on the steps but someone pulls the referee out of the ring at two. It’s the returning Edge, who I presume was hiding under the ring the whole time. He steals a camera and clocks Undertaker with it before hitting a Conchairto on the steps. Batista has no idea this is going on after the Tombstone. Edge pulls the champ on top and the pin is pretty much academic.
Rating: B+. This was very good but it never quite got to that level that they were hoping for it to I don’t think. The problem is this was match was based on respect instead of hatred which takes a lot out of a match like this. Edge would win the title in a triple threat next month and eventually lose it to Undertaker at Wrestlemania.
After the Cell is raised, Edge beats on Undertaker some more to end the show.
Overall Rating: B. This was a nice surprise. The Tag Team Title match is some uninspired stuff but other than that (ignoring the non-match between Khali and Hornswoggle) there’s nothing bad on here at all. The Divas match is what it is and if the worst thing I have to do is look at Kelly Kelly and Maria in barely there shorts for five minutes, I’ve got a good show on my hands. The big matches delivered and the other matches aren’t bad so this is a solid show all around and worth checking out.
Ratings Comparison
CM Punk vs. John Morrison vs. The Miz
Original: B-
Redo: C
Mickie James/Maria/Torrie Wilson/Michelle McCool/Kelly Kelly vs. Beth Phoenix/Melina/Jillian Hall/Victoria/Layla
Original: D
Redo: D
Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch vs. Hardcore Holly/Cody Rhodes
Original: D
Redo: C-
Team HHH vs. Team Umaga
Original: C-
Redo: B-
Great Khali vs. Hornswoggle
Original: N/A
Redo: N/A
Randy Orton vs. Shawn Michaels
Original: D+
Redo: B
Batista vs. Undertaker
Original: A-
Redo: B+
Overall Rating
Original: B-
Redo: B
The main thing I’ve learned about myself from these redos is that I was a lot looser with my grades back then. The redo grades here are a lot more toned down and it’s a bit harder to please me now.
Here’s the original review if you’re interested:
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete 1997 Monday Night Raw Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:
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Survivor Series 2006
Date: November 26, 2006
Location: Wachovia Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 15,400
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler
Another match of note on the show is Mickie James challenging Lita for the Women’s Championship in what would be Lita’s final match. Combining this with Trish Stratus leaving just a few months earlier, the Divas division was in a huge state of flux with the two biggest stars it ever had leaving in the span of a few months. Let’s get to it.
This is the 20th show so we talk about tradition and all that jazz. Then it turns into a regular video about a PPV, but a good one.
Team Legends vs. Spirit Squad
Legends: Ric Flair, Sgt. Slaughter, Ron Simmons, Dusty Rhodes
Spirit Squad: Kenny, Johnny, Nicky, Mikey
Slaughter is replacing a cancer ridden Roddy Piper. Actually he got very lucky as he got a concussion because of a Conchairto from Edge, and on the tests the cancer was found. Arn Anderson is here with the Legends and we get the awesome Horsemen music. The only member of the Squad (a group of male cheerleaders) still around is Nicky, more famous as Dolph Ziggler, so I’ll spare you from an explanation. Kenny is the only other one that stuck around after the team split up anyway.
Simmons and Mikey start things off and guess who wins the slugout. Ron beats up all of them but Mitch, the fifth member of the squad not in the match, interferes and gets Ron on the floor. Mitch’s distraction leads to Simmons getting counted out. Mitch (the other cheerleader) gets ejected but Simmons beats him up first. Anderson gets ejected as well for no apparent reason. The Philly fans are TICKED. Nicky comes in to face Sarge and he mocks the salute. Fan: “PUNCH HIM IN THE FACE!”
Sarge beats him up with ease and it’s off to Dusty for some gyrating and elbows to the arm. It’s Flair time and you know the Philly fans are all for that one. A chop later and it’s right back to Slaughter who hooks the Cobra Clutch, but Dusty and Kenny come in to fight, allowing Johnny to kick Sarge in the head to give Nicky a pin. Off to Dusty who hits the bionic elbow on Nicky for the immediate elimination, making it 3-2. Dusty gets caught in the corner but he gyrates it off.
The Flip Flop and Fly takes Kenny down but another elbow misses, giving Kenny a rollup (with a handful of jeans) pin. It’s Kenny/Johnny/Mikey vs. Flair now with Mikey starting first. Flair chops him into the corner but Mikey starts punching away. Ric hits a quick atomic drop and gets a rollup with feet on the ropes (now THAT is vintage Flair) for the elimination. Kenny gets in some shots but ducks his head and gets cradled for the pin, leaving Flair vs. Johnny. Less than a minute later it’s a Figure Four to give Flair the win.
Rating: C-. This was exactly what it was expected to be and that’s all it should have been. The legends were there to have a feel good nostalgia moment and get eliminated so Flair, the only one who had been active in the last three years or so, could knock out all of the Squad and give the fans a feel good moment. Also it’s only about ten minutes long so it’s not like this was anything major. It’s not a good technical match, but if that’s what you’re expecting here, you missed the point entirely. Besides, the Squad was gone literally the next night.
Post match the Squad beats down Flair and the Legends….are nowhere in sight. Kind of a downer.
We recap Benoit vs. Chavo. Benoit came back from an injury and won the US Title but Vickie and Chavo, his former friends, wanted nothing to do with him. Chavo and Vickie didn’t like Rey making his name off Eddie’s legacy, which is true but I don’t blame Rey for it. Chavo injured Rey’s knee (Mysterio needed time off for surgery) but when Benoit tried to make the save, the Guerreros weren’t happy. There was also some nonsense about Eddie’s estate which didn’t going anywhere.
US Title: Chris Benoit vs. Chavo Guerrero
Benoit, the champion, pounds away to start and hits a quick backbreaker for one. Some knees to the ribs set up a snap suplex for another two. Chavo comes back with a bunch of forearms and stomps in the corner, only to get caught in the Crossface. Vickie makes the save by putting Chavo’s boot on the rope. Chavo hits a pair of suplexes for two and it’s off to a chinlock.
Benoit comes out of it with a Samoan drop of all things but gets dropkicked right back down for two. Another suplex is countered and Benoit rolls some Germans to set up the swan dive. Vickie grabs Benoit’s foot and the distraction makes the dive miss, sending Chris’ head crashing into the mat again. Chavo suplexes him down (again) but the frog splash only gets two. Benoit loads up the Sharpshooter but gets kicked off into Vickie who is on the apron. There’s the Crossface and Chavo taps out.
Rating: D+. That’s likely a bit low but this was a dull match. Chavo came off as more of an annoyance than a challenge here and that never makes for an entertaining match. I still shudder whenever I see Benoit take a head shot like he did off the swan dive as I always wonder which shot was the point of no return for him.
Lita says that she’s done after tonight’s match (that’s actually true) and she’s glad it’s in front of these horrible fans in Philadelphia. Edge makes some Donovan McNabb jokes and says his team is going to take out Team DX. After he leaves, Cryme Tyme leaves Lita’s locker room with a box of her stuff.
Women’s Title: Lita vs. Mickie James
Lita is defending and slaps Mickie in the face to start, causing Mickie to choke away in the corner. The champ comes back by literally throwing Mickie around which is a bit less than what you would expect from someone as talented as Lita. Mickie goes up and gets slammed off the top as this is one sided so far. The fans think Lita is a crack w****. Their words, not mine.
A quick snap suplex gets two for Lita as this continues to be slow. Off to a sleeper from Lita which is the last thing this match needed. Mickie gets in the ropes and avoids a charge in the corner. She goes up and is immediately suplexed down for two. Now the fans think Lita has herpes. Again, their words not mine. Mickie hits a SWEET spinning kick to take Lita’s head off followed by a fisherman’s suplex for two. Moonsault gets two for Lita but the Edgecution is countered, giving Mickie two. They trade rollups and Mickie hits the jumping DDT to retire Lita and win the title.
Rating: D. Most of that is for the ending with Lita’s head bouncing off the mat. Other than that, this was some pretty uninspired stuff. Lita left when she should have as she had nothing left to accomplish and no one like Trish to work with. Pretty terrible match here but it passed the torch to Mickie who was indeed the future of the division.
Lita asks for a microphone and makes Lillian tell the crowd to cheer for her. She doesn’t like being booed and is glad to get to leave in front of Philly because its fans suck. Here’s Cryme Tyme with the box of Lita’s stuff they stole earlier. They’re having a HO Sale and it’s cash only. The first item sold: Lita’s yeast infection medicine for one dollar.
Cryme Tyme realizes JBL is at the announce table and offer the goods to him. He says he’s the only person in America who doesn’t have some of Lita’s underwear so he gives them $100. The next item: Lita’s massager. That goes for 25 bucks and there’s only one thing left. It’s cheap, it’s wide, you can put your head in it: it’s Lita’s box. That goes for 20 bucks to end a hilarious segment.
Batista has nothing to say about the title match tonight. Booker attacked Batista at the contract signing and hit him in the throat with a scepter. After seeing a clip of it, Batista says he’s leaving tonight with the title.
Team DX vs. Team Rated-RKO
Team DX: Shawn Michaels, HHH, Hardy Boys, CM Punk
Team Rated-RKO: Edge, Randy Orton, Johnny Nitro, Mike Knox, Gregory Helms
This is Punk’s first major match and Jeff is Intercontinental Champion. DX plays to the crowd for a LONG time before the heel entrances. The fans of course LOVE Punk, so he gets to ask if the fans are ready. Helms, the current Cruiserweight Champion, is feuding with Matt Hardy at this point. Knox, a big power guy with a beard, has a chick named Kelly Kelly with him at the moment and she’s an exhibitionist. Rated-RKO are the Raw Tag Team Champions too so most of the gold in the company is in this match.
HHH asks Kelly to flash him and has Shawn cover his eyes. Knox comes in to stop it but Shawn kicks him in the face to eliminate him. Shawn to HHH: “Who was that guy?” Points for a funny bit if nothing else. Nitro comes in to speed things up but Shawn slides to the floor and puts his arm around Melina. We’ve got a comedy match here people. Off to Jeff who works on Nitro’s arm to continue their recent feud.
Off to Matt so the Hardys can hit some nice double team stuff. Nitro finally gets in a shot to the face and it’s off to Helms. Matt is slammed off the top and it’s off to Edge to stomp on Matt. Well that’s appropriate. Back to Helms for a suplex and it’s immediately off to Orton. After some very basic stuff, here’s Nitro again so Melina can SCREECH. Matt hooks the Side Effect and there’s the tag to Punk. Punk immediately starts his strikes and hits the knee/bulldog in the corner.
Nitro blocks the Rock Bottom but the second attempt (with an assist from Matt) sets up the Vice for the tap out. Edge comes in to face Punk and the fans are very pleased. Punk pounds on him in the corner but Orton guillotines Punk on the top rope to give the heels their first advantage. Randy comes in and hits a dropkick for two before it’s back to Helms. After some knees to the face, Helms hits a one knee Codebreaker to put Punk down.
Back to Orton for a slugout with Punk, resulting in the RKO taking Punk down. Why Randy can’t cover immediately isn’t quite clear but Shawn makes the save anyway. Edge gets the tag but spears the buckle. JR: “That middle turnbuckle isn’t in the match!” Hot tag brings in HHH to face Helms and the beating is on fast. A facebuster puts Helms down but the Edge-O-Matic breaks up the Pedigree. Everything breaks down and Jeff and Shawn dive on Rated-RKO.
Matt comes in with the Twist on Helms followed by a Swanton to make it 5-2. The heels take their belts and walk but the Hardys will have none of that. Team DX take turns beating up both members and it’s Sweet Chin Music to eliminate Edge. So it’s Orton vs. five guys now and Randy tries to run, but the Hardys and Punk stop him. Back in and it’s Chin Music and the Pedigree to complete the sweep.
Rating: C-. This was entertaining but it’s kind of a questionable ending when you consider the captains were in a pretty big feud. The guy that gets the big rub here is Punk, as he goes from a guy on the C show to rubbing elbows with two of the biggest stars ever and one of the best tag teams ever. Fun match here but it didn’t really accomplish much.
We recap Kennedy vs. Undertaker. Kennedy is a very loud guy that likes to challenge legends and would become Mr. Anderson in TNA. Basically Kennedy wants to break the legend of Undertaker, or about the same thing as about half the feuds Undertaker has had in years. It’s a first blood match tonight because Kennedy busted Undertaker open on Smackdown recently. Kennedy got a blood bath from Undertaker’s magic powers.
Kennedy isn’t worried but MVP (think Deion Sanders) comes up and notices the Vaseline on Kennedy’s forehead. I guess the referee isn’t watching the interview.
Mr. Kennedy vs. Undertaker
Kennedy immediately drops to the floor to try to get an early advantage, but Undertaker punches him down as soon as they get back inside. We head back to the floor and Kennedy gets punched over the announcers’ table with Undertaker in total control. We head to the crowd and Undertaker hits a pair of headbutts. Back to ringside and Kennedy gets in his first big move by sending Undertaker into the steps.
Kennedy tries to dive off the apron but gets caught and rammed into the post. This has been almost all Undertaker so far. We head back in and Undertaker busts out a superplex to put Kennedy down. The offense looks good but shouldn’t Undertaker be going for the head? I don’t know if internal bleeding counts but it hasn’t been mentioned in any first blood match I’ve ever seen. Kennedy hits Undertaker low but Undertaker immediately comes back with a kick to the face.
A buckle was taken off somewhere in there by Kennedy but Undertaker sends him into it twice in a row. Kennedy kicks Undertaker low again and Kennedy is bleeding from the mouth. He rolls to the floor before the referee can see it and here’s MVP with a towel to clean up the blood. They start to walk away, but MVP throws Kennedy back in the ring which is payback for Kennedy doing the same thing to MVP on Smackdown.
Undertaker pounds away in the corner but Kennedy drops him face first on the exposed buckle. Kennedy starts pounding away but MVP brings in a chair to hit….someone. It winds up hitting Undertaker and busts him open to give Kennedy the upset win. The fans boo that out of the building because Undertaker is such a legend at this point.
Rating: C. This was a decent brawl but the ending, which was to advance Undertaker/Kane vs. MVP/Kennedy, kind of sucks. The feud just never worked because at the end of the day, it’s two guys who are career midcarders at this point against two former World Champions who can beat up anyone. Kennedy never got to the point where they wanted him to be due to various reasons, but this is the fifth former World Champion he had beaten.
Kennedy beats up Undertaker post match but Undertaker snaps up and pounds him down as well. Undertaker WHACKS him with the chair to get a gasp from the crowd. JBL LOSES IT as Kennedy gets beaten up even more and tombstoned.
Sharmell tells Booker to be excited because tonight is Batista’s last chance.
Team Cena vs. Team Big Show
John Cena, Kane, Bobby Lashley, Sabu, Rob Van Dam
Big Show, Test, MVP, Finlay, Umaga
It’s Philadelphia and we’ve got Sabu and RVD on one team so I think you can guess the crowd reactions. Cena is Raw World Champion and Big Show is ECW Champion. Umaga, a Samoan and formerly Jamal of 3 Minute Warning is still undefeated and a monster. Finlay is an Irish brawler.
Naturally Cena is booed out of the building by the hardcore crowd. Cena and Umaga start things off with Cena getting knocked to the floor. Everything breaks down and Umaga gets a monitor to knock out RVD for a DQ. Umaga also destroys the rest of Team Cena because that’s what savages do.
We finally get down to Finlay vs. RVD but it’s quickly off to Test for some bland big man power stuff. Back to Irishman for some stomping and then to really mix things up, MVP comes in and stomps as well. Van Dam is bleeding from the mouth as MVP puts on a chinlock. Rob comes back with a cradle for two and a spin kick to take MVP down. Van Dam kicks all of the heels including a LOUD one to Finlay. Test tries to ram RVD into the post but since he’s big and dumb, Test’s head goes into it instead. Kane chokeslams MVP and the Five Star gets the pin for Rob.
While Van Dam is getting up, Test immediately comes in and kicks his head off to make it 4-3. Test gets sent to the floor and Lashley spears him down, followed by a tornado DDT from Sabu back inside for the pin. Show immediately chokeslams Sabu to make it 3-2 and it’s time for the giants to fight. They both grabs chokeslam grips but here’s Hornswoggle (the Little Bastard at the moment) for a distraction. Finlay clocks Kane with his club so Show can pin Kane after a chokeslam. Starting with MVP’s pin, those five eliminations all came within less than two minutes. I didn’t skip anything in between.
To recap, it’s Show/Finlay vs. Cena/Lashley. Cena comes in to face the monster but is immediately taken down. Off to Finlay for a clothesline and some good old fashioned cheating. Show sends Cena flying off a headbutt and it’s back to the heel corner. After more of a beating, Cena fights them both off and makes the hot tag to Lashley. Powerslam is escaped but a spear puts Finlay down for two.
A double clothesline from Show puts Cena and Lashley down and here’s Hornswoggle again. Cena loads him up in the FU and in the distraction, Lashley spears Finlay down to make it 2-1. Both good guys take their turns on Show including stuff like double DDTs and double suplexes. JR calls Cena cock strong and I don’t want to know what that one means. Lashley breaks up the chokeslam with a spear and the FU gets the final pin.
Rating: D. As I was writing that, it felt like I was just saying what was happening and nothing special was going on. The reason it felt like nothing was going on was because nothing was going on. This match was as paint by numbers as you could ever ask for and that makes for a VERY dull match. Cena hitting the FU on Show is always worth seeing, but this didn’t work at all.
JR says that Lashley is debuting at Survivor Series tonight which is flat out wrong. To be a bit fair though, JR wasn’t on commentary for that match last year.
The Extreme Elimination Chamber is coming.
We recap Booker T vs. Batista. Booker won the King of the Ring and became a king with a bad British accent before winning the title off Rey Mysterio. He kept cheating to beat Batista and tonight is Batista’s last shot at the title unless he wins. Batista never lost the title in the first place and had to drop it due to injury, so tonight is his last chance to regain what he believes is still his.
Before the match, Teddy comes out and says that if Booker gets counted out or DQ’ed, he loses the title.
Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. Booker T
Booker is defending of course. Batista jumps him in the aisle and the referee says you have to get it in the ring. Why? Batista can win the title via DQ so no he doesn’t need to get it in the ring. Also the ruling said Booker loses if he gets counted out. It said nothing about him losing by countout so would a draw give Batista the title? Booker fires off some chops in the corner and is immediately punched in the face for his efforts. A suplex puts Booker down but he escapes an early Batista Bomb attempt.
After Booker gets back in, Batista hits a clothesline for two. This isn’t really working so far. Booker finally comes back with a hot shot to take over before sling shotting Batista’s throat into the bottom rope. Batista comes back with some right hands but Booker pokes him in the eye. We’re about five minutes into this and it’s not clicking at all. Big Dave comes out of nowhere with a side slam for two followed by a Jackhammer.
A Boss Man Slam gets two for Batista and they head to the apron to slug it out. Cole brings up a good question: what happens if there’s a double countout or double DQ? Egads now I’m thinking like Michael Cole. Presumably it would be a draw and Booker keeps the title but it’s not clear. A Sharmell distraction lets Booker take over as JBL goes on a tirade about Teddy Long being racist. Side kick puts Batista down for two. We hit a chinlock to fill in some time which is probably the last thing they should do right now. Batista comes back with some right hands and a belly to belly suplex for two.
Batista cranks things up and knocks Booker to the floor before sending him into the steps. Back in and a top rope shoulder gets two. The spinebuster gets the same but Booker grabs the Bookend for two. Batista comes back with the Batista Bomb but the champ grabs the rope. Sharmell gives Booker the title, Batista takes it from him and clocks Booker with it, new champion. That’s how the show ends: not with a Batista Bomb, but with Batista cheating.
Rating: D-. A horrible match to end a horrible show is always appropriate. Batista getting the title back was probably the right move as he was insanely over and hadn’t been champion since January. This match didn’t work at all though and it was the last time Booker would be near the World Title, which is probably a good thing if he’s as bad as he looked here.
Overall Rating: D-. When the second best match of your show is a group of guys in their late fifties or early sixties beating up male cheerleaders for ten minutes, your show is in trouble. There’s NOTHING worth seeing here at all and this show sucked. The other odd thing here is where the time went.
This show runs about two hours and forty minutes and the longest match (main event) doesn’t break fourteen minutes. There’s no big segment on it either so I have no idea where the time went. Other than the main event nothing is awful but there’s nothing worth watching. Either way, this is an awful show and probably the worst since the 90s.
Ratings Comparison
Team Legends vs. Spirit Squad
Original: C+
Redo: C-
Chris Benoit vs. Chavo Guerrero
Original: B
Redo: D+
Mickie James vs. Lita
Original: B
Redo: D
Team DX vs. Team Rated-RKO
Original: B
Redo: C-
Mr. Kennedy vs. Undertaker
Original: C+
Redo: C
Team Cena vs. Team Big Show
Original: D+
Redo: D
Batista vs. Booker T
Original: D-
Redo: D-
Overall Rating
Original: C-
Redo: D-
WHAT WAS I THINKING ON THOSE EARLIER MATCHES???
Here’s the original review if you’re interested:
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete 1997 Monday Night Raw Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:
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And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at: