Superstars
Date: January 26, 1997
Location: Cajun Dome, Lafayette, Louisiana
Attendance: 6,075
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jim Cornette

This is a random show that popped up on the WWE Vault but it seems to be football themed. In this case we have the Superstar Bowl, which is apparently an elimination tag match. That should make for an interesting show, with the bonus of the Royal Rumble taking place a week earlier. Let’s get to it.

We open with a look back at Shawn Michaels regaining the WWF Title at the Royal Rumble.

Opening sequence.

Commentary runs down the card.

Godwinns vs. Nation Of Domination vs. Doug Furnas/Philip LaFon vs. Owen Hart/British Bulldog

This is the Superstars Bowl (meaning an elimination tag), Bulldog and Hart’s Tag Team Titles aren’t on the line, and Sunny is guest timekeeper. LaFon and Bulldog start things off with LaFon pulling him down into a kneebar, sending Bulldog straight to the rope. Bulldog pulls him out of the air but can’t gets the powerslam.

Furnas comes in to take Hart down but Hart is right back to crank on the leg. A slap brings in LaFon, which means Hart and Bulldog can stomp on Furnas as good heels should. Phineas tags himself in to suplex Hart onto LaFon but Crush breaks up the Slop Drop. A dropkick sends Phineas into a rollup to give LaFon the elimination at 3:53.

We take a break and come back with Bulldog clotheslining Faarooq so Furnas can get a quick two. A missed charge lets Furnas armdrag Crush and let’s go split screen so Hunter Hearst Helmsley (with his butler Curtis, better known as Mr. Hughes) can talk about his match tonight with Ahmed Johnson. They shouldn’t be in the same ring together, but there are proper showers and soap here so it can happen before their title match at In Your House.

Back in the ring, Furnas hurricanranas Hart down but gets his head kicked off with an enziguri for two. Bulldog comes in and throws Furnas into the corner, where Crush comes in to hammer Furnas down. A backbreaker drops Furnas and it’s back to Bulldog for the delayed vertical suplex. Bulldog picks him up again but Faarooq sneaks in with a chop block to give Furnas the fluke pin at 12:22. We cut to Honky Tonk Man trying to recruit Rocky Maivia and we take another break.

We come back with Furnas fighting out of a chinlock and go split screen so Ahmed Johnson can call the Intercontinental Title the “people’s title”. Cornette thanks Johnson for taking time away from his job as a UN interpreter (ha) and come back to Faarooq being punched out of the air (Cornette knew that was a bad idea). LaFon comes in to clean house until Crush belly to back suplexes him out of the corner. Furnas takes Crush out to the floor but Faarooq grabs the Dominator to pin LaFon at 19:06.

Rating: C+. It was perfectly acceptable, but the tag division was hardly in a good place at this point. Bulldog and Hart were good, but Furnas and LaFon just never connected. While they were definitely talented in the ring, they weren’t the kind of team who was going to become a big deal. There wasn’t really anything unique about the match either, though I can go with having something special for a big day.

We look at the controversial ending to the Royal Rumble (with Steve Austin slipping back in and winning), setting up the outstanding Final Four match at In Your House.

On Raw, Bret Hart went on a great rant against Vince McMahon about Steve Austin. Believe it or not, he doesn’t like Shawn Michaels either and since he can’t get an opportunity, he quits.

Later in the night, Austin says Hart hasn’t quit complaining since he got back. He should just go back to Canada because the only man he can beat is his wrinkled old man.

Also later in the night, Gorilla Monsoon set up the four way at Final Four. This brought out Austin to complain about the whole thing and threatened Monsoon as well. Hart returned and brawled with Austin, as was his custom.

The four in the match brawled to end the show.

Here is Hart in person for a chat. He doesn’t want to be remembered as a loser or a quitter but he hates Steve Austin. He’s looking forward to Final Four though because he can beat all three guys at once. This place is kind of like King Of The Hill and he’s almost got his hands on the prize at the top, but there are three people stomping on his fingers. They won’t stop him though, because he will be the WWF Champion for the fourth time. This was Hart trying to say “yeah I’m still my old self, forget that whining on Monday.”.

We look at Savio Vega turning on Ahmed Johnson and joining the Nation Of Domination. Naturally he wasn’t here earlier because of the taping schedule but that’s not something we talk about.

Ahmed Johnson vs. Hunter Hearst Helmsley

Non-title and Curtis is here with Helmsley. Johnson shoves him down with ease to start and then hits a running shoulder. This allows us to do little more than have Johnson stand in one place, which is a good idea. Johnson clotheslines him down and hits a kick to the ribs, followed by an ax kick (with the far leg for some reason). Helmsley knocks him to the floor and we take a break as Goldust and Marlena are watching in the back.

We come back with Helmsley dropping a knee for two as frustration is setting in. Johnson manages a suplex and wins a slugout, which has Helmsley making a hand signal. That’s enough for Curtis to come in with a belt shot but Johnson sends Helmsley outside on the kickout. The spinebuster looks to set up the Pearl River Plunge but Curtis runs in for the DQ at 13:38.

Rating: C-. I was a huge Ahmed Johnson fan back in the day but my goodness that man was a special kind of terrible. He would make the most basic stuff look awkward and was usually at his best when he wasn’t doing much. That’s not exactly a great sign, and the ending didn’t make me want to see these two fight for the title again. It’s no wonder why Johnson got such a huge push, but it’s also no surprise that it really didn’t work for him in the end.

Post match Johnson Hulks Up to take out Curtis as Goldust runs in to brawl with Helmsley to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. It was a nice look back at a time of transition in the WWF, but that doesn’t mean it was a particularly good show. The Superstars Bowl was a bit of a treat but the long Raw recap and the not exactly noteworthy main event didn’t help. I do like seeing a random episode from this time as it’s such a flashback and different from just putting up Raw, though a better show would be nice.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter and Bluesky @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Mega Matches
Commentators: Sean Mooney, Lord Alfred Hayes, Jimmy Hart, Honky Tonk Man, Gorilla Monsoon, Hillbilly Jim, Brother Love
Host: Sean Mooney

It’s another Coliseum Video and that means exactly the usual: likely a bunch of nothing matches with one or two gems in there to spice it up a bit. Most of these tapes aren’t very good, but it’s still fun to revisit them and see just what was going on. This is from early 1991 so let’s get to it.

Sean Mooney, in the studio, welcomes us to the show and promises us some good matches.

Tito Santana is ready to show Earthquake what he can do. Arriba!

From Cape Girardeau, Missouri, October 10, 1990.

Tito Santana vs. Earthquake

Jimmy Hart is here with Earthquake. Santana tries a top wristlock and is shoved down just as fast. Earthquake powers him into the corner but misses a big forearm. That lets Santana work on the arm and actually take him down to one knee. Earthquake isn’t having that and grabs a slam but misses the big elbow.

Santana works on the arm again and is quickly sent into the corner so the slow beating can ensue. A bearhug keeps Santana in trouble, only for him to bite the head for an escape. The dropkick sets up the flying forearm for two, though Earthquake is rocked. Back up and the powerslam sets up the big elbow, followed by….well actually Tugboat coming in to go after Earthquake for the DQ at 7:41.

Rating: C. This could have been a lot worse, which isn’t a surprise as Santana can make almost anything work. Earthquake was the top heel in the company at this point and having him beat up someone like Santana was only going to help him. It might not have been a classic and there was only so much Santana could do, but at least it could have been a lot worse.

Post match the brawl is on until Dino Bravo and Rhythm And Blues run in for the beatdown. Jim Duggan, with his 2×4, makes the save. That’s quite the angle for a Coliseum Video and it worked rather well, with a pretty terrible six man tag being a possibility.

Big Boss Man is really not happy with Bobby Heenan insulting his mother. She’s one of his “prized possessions”, which has quite a few issues. Either way, Boss Man promises to beat some respect into Heenan.

From Chattanooga, Tennessee, January 8, 1991.

Big Boss Man vs. Bobby Heenan

This is a Ball And Chain match, with Boss Man bringing out the object in question. Before the match, Heenan begs for mercy and promises to send Boss Man’s mother a bunch of flowers. The bell rings and Heenan begs for forgiveness, saying he doesn’t know Boss Man’s mother and didn’t mean anything he’s been saying.

The groveling continues, with Heenan saying they both know he can’t fight Boss Man and says Boss Man’s mother is on the phone in the back. He begs for his life and tells Boss Man to go talk to his mother and he’ll wait right here. Boss Man doesn’t fall for that but Heenan hits him with the microphone. That’s the extent of his offense as Boss Man knocks him down and hits an ax handle for the pin at 2:40. Basically just an angle rather than a match.

Post match Boss Man drops the ball onto Heenan but Mr. Perfect runs in for the save. Boss Man dispatches him just as quickly. I still don’t get why Boss Man didn’t win the Intercontinental Title at Wrestlemania.

It’s time for the fan requested match.

From Tampa, Florida, December 11, 1990.

Sgt. Slaughter vs. Jim Duggan

General Adnan is here with Slaughter, who jumps Duggan on the way in. Duggan fights back and slugs away, much to the fans’ delight. An elbow to the face drops Duggan though and Slaughter get sin his assortment of stomps. Some elbows miss though and Duggan hits a backdrop, only for Adnan to break up the three point clothesline. The chase is on and Duggan gets counted out at 3:06.

Rating: D. This was pretty much nothing, which was the point in having Duggan out there to pop the crowd while Slaughter doesn’t get the big win. Slaughter was on his way up, but there was only so much he could do in the ring. At the same time though, Slaughter was getting solid enough heat from the fans. I’m just not sure it was “top heel” level heat, which is why it didn’t go so well.

Post match Duggan clears Slaughter out and does inappropriate things with the Iraqi flag.

From New York City, New York, November 24, 1990.

Bret Hart vs. Barbarian

Hart tries a hiptoss to start but gets knocked down to start the slow beating. Barbarian sends him into the corner for some slow stomping but the middle rope elbow misses. Hart’s right hands in the corner set up the Russian legsweep and middle rope elbow for two. Back up and a quick powerslam gives Barbarian two and he blocks a sunset flip. As usual though, he strikes a double biceps pose and gets rolled up at 4:09 (these two did that finish A LOT).

Rating: C. They didn’t have much time to do anything here but the finish was something that worked rather well for them. I’ve said this a lot Barbarian is someone who can’t do much in the way of variety, but he knows how to do his style rather well. That’s what we got here, and Hart gets to beat a midcard monster. They could do more with extra time, but there was only so much to be done in such a short match.

From Cape Girardeau, Missouri, October 10, 1990.

Bushwhackers vs. Rhythm And Blues

Jimmy Hart is here with the villains, who jump them to start fast. Back up and the villains are sent into each other and we settle down to Valentine getting in a clothesline to cut Luke off. Honky Tonk Man comes in to slowly hammer away and we hit the chinlock. That doesn’t last long as Valentine comes in to knock Butch off the apron, meaning double teaming can ensue. They stomp on Luke even more until Butch grabs the guitar and runs in for the DQ at 4:03.

Rating: D+. Yeah this was about what you would have expected, as neither team was exactly worth seeing on their best day (well at least in the WWF). As usual, the fans were into the Bushwhackers due to their usual wackiness. That only gets you so far though, especially with how little of it they actually did here.

Post match the Bushwhackers wreck the guitars.

From Providence, Rhodes Island, August 8, 1990.

Hulk Hogan vs. Dino Bravo

Earthquake and Jimmy Hart (in the rare no sunglasses look) are here too and yeah Hogan is still over (ignore the whole BIG RETURN at Summerslam later in the month). Big Boss Man comes out to be in Hogan’s corner and that should even things up a bit. Hayes says Boss Man can prevent the planned SKULLDUGGERY from the villains, earning his paycheck for the night.

They circle each other for a good while to start until Hogan shoves him into the corner, about two minutes into the match. Hogan cleans out the villains, showing that the Boss Man really doesn’t need to be here. Bravo works on a wristlock, which is reversed, but Earthquake gets in a cheap shot. That lets Bravo choke on the ropes and he sends Hogan outside, with Earthquake beating Hogan up again. Geez Boss Man is kind of terrible at this job. Back in and we hit the bearhug, which stays on for a good while until we get the two arm drops. Hogan fights out and it’s the usual stuff until the legdrop finishes Bravo at 8:25.

Rating: C-. You know what you’re going to get with a Hogan match around this time, though he did at least have a bit more energy with the stuff before the bell. At the same time, what are you expecting out of a big time match against someone like Bravo? Earthquake was right there as a monster, but Hogan fighting the less than intimidating monster was hardly thrilling.

Post match the villains comes in but Boss Man FINALLY does something by knocking Earthquake to the floor. Posing ensues.

Sean Mooney recaps the beginnings of Hillbilly Jim’s career before sending us to…Mudlick, Kentucky. Oh dear.

We go to Jim’s farm and now it’s time to look at some home movies. It’s the middle of winter and Jim invites us into the house, where Granny is watching an old WWF show. She’s a big Hulk Hogan fan but tells Jim to take his hat off. Jim is VERY excited about his first match so Granny stops for a drink of moonshine. Then Jim stops to play the guitar and sing, including a closeup of the family dog.

Jim goes over to light up a stove and put on his overhauls so he can demonstrate some holds on a tire (in the kitchen, of course). Then he drops an elbow on a stained mattress and goes after the dog, which brings Granny in to break it up. For some reason, I remember this from when I was a kid, even down to the dog.

Jim thanks us for watching and goes back to shoveling.

From New York City, New York, October 19, 1990.

British Bulldog vs. Haku

Joined in progress with Haku fighting up but getting taken back down by the arm. Bulldog misses a charge in the corner though and Haku hammers away. A crossbody and crucifix get Bulldog out of trouble but Haku grabs a hard piledriver for two. The chinlock goes on for a bit, followed by a knee to the ribs to cut off a comeback attempt.

We hit another chinlock before Bulldog is sent outside for a crash. Back in and Haku pulls the braided hair before grabbing another chinlock. Monsoon goes off on Haku’s lazy cover as only he can, with Hayes suggesting that Haku is hurt and Monsoon…thinks that’s a good observation. Bulldog suplexes his way out of trouble for two and they need some time to get up.

With Haku still down, Bulldog grabs a SHARPSHOOTER of all things (which is hard on someone wrestling barefoot) but Haku is in the ribs rather quickly. Haku’s shoulderbreaker gets two but he misses a charge into the corner. The powerslam finishes for Bulldog at 15:55 (out of 19:34 total).

Rating: C-. Sweet goodness that was a long match and that is going to hurt things. At the same time, Bulldog was pretty much brand new as a single star at this point after a stretch away from the company. It made for a dull match, but at least Bulldog won and the fans reacted, so something went right.

Mooney’s clothes are getting messed up due to….well they needed something. Then he picks up a giant crayon. Are his clothes too big because everything is large on MEGA Matches? Geez that’s stretching even for around here.

Randy Savage, with Sensational Sherri, brags about his greatness and is ready to prove what he can do again.

From New York City, New York, October 28, 1989.

Randy Savage vs. Jim Duggan

Macho King’s Crown is on the line so Queen Sherri is with him. Duggan slugs away in the corner to start and drops him with a clothesline, which has Sherri trying to get Savage out. Instead Duggan gives him a big atomic drop but Sherri low bridges Duggan outside. Can you imagine Elizabeth doing that? Of course not, which is why Savage made the right switch. Sherri even gets in a posting and a purse shot as this referee is even worse than usual.

Savage goes after Duggan, which is enough to distract the referee so Sherri can kick Duggan in the face. Monsoon is rightfully losing it as Savage goes out to the apron for another shot to the face. A top rope ax handle hits Duggan for two back inside, followed by the top rope neck snap across the top for the same. The running crotch attack in the ropes misses though and Duggan has a breather.

Duggan is fine enough to knock Savage out of the air and then send him outside as the comeback is on. Savage is sent into various things and Duggan drops him inside again, only for Sherri to distract the referee. Duggan yells at her and runs Savage over again but Savage comes back with a clothesline out of the corner. The top rope elbow misses though and Duggan hits some clotheslines of his own.

The three point clothesline sends Savage crashing to the floor, where Sherri rakes Duggan’s back. This time Sherri is sent outside for some grabbing, allowing Savage to knee Duggan into the referee in the corner. Duggan small package gets no count as there’s no referee so he clotheslines Savage down again and counts his own three.

Sherri uses the distraction to hand Savage the loaded purse and Duggan is knocked cold for….the…..any day now…..one….two….and Duggan kicks out, thankfully as otherwise he would have been legally dead. Duggan pulls him down in the corner but Savage puts his feet on the ropes, with Sherri holding the legs for ANOTHER ridiculously slow count and the pin at 17:01.

Rating: B-. Duggan winning wasn’t the most likely result here, but dang it’s easy to get behind pretty much anything he’s doing. He’s one of the best good guys from this era, even if he was limited in the ring to say the least. That being said, the ref bump and slow counts at the end were ridiculous and killed the flow they had going. These two did have chemistry though, which shouldn’t be a surprise given how amazing Savage was at this point.

Post match Duggan decks Savage with a 2×4.

Savage and Sherri are on Lifestyles Of The Rich And Famous, with Savage cheating to win at croquet. That’s a very Savage thing to do.

From New York City, New York, January 21, 1991.

Randy Savage vs. Ultimate Warrior

In a cage, Sherri is with Savage, and this is two days after Savage cost Warrior the WWF Title at Wrestlemania. Savage tries to jump Warrior during his entrance and the brawl is on outside. They get inside with Warrior taking over, including an atomic drop and the big right hands. Sherri offers a distraction, which just earns Savage another clothesline. Back up and Savage manages to send him into the cage for a needed breather.

Warriors gets up and they both hit clotheslines to leave them down again. Savage covers for a delayed two (as the referee has to climb in before counting) but Warrior blocks a ram into the cage. Sherri’s distraction lets Savage ram him in though and it’s time to choke. Some more choking on the ropes has Warrior in trouble and the top rope elbow gets two, with Savage FLYING off the kickout.

Warrior makes the big comeback but the splash hits raised knees. Savage tries to escape and gets most of the way there, only to forget about the “jump three feet” option, allowing Warrior to make the save. Sherri decks the referee and goes inside to cut Warrior off. Some choking with her removed top lets Savage get out for the win at 10:34.

Rating: B-. Yeah they beat each other up rather well and it made for a good match, though I was expecting Warrior to be a bit more aggressive and livid after what happened two days ago. That could have been better, but it was nice to see Savage win this kind of a match, even with shenanigans. Otherwise, it was a good, back and forth fight, which felt like a main event.

Post match we’re clipped to Savage going to the top of the cage but getting punched out of the air. Warrior fights back and unloads on Savage, even shoving some referees as a bonus. The Nasty Boys come in to try to hold Warrior back, which doesn’t work either. More referees come in and Sherri gets in a scepter shot to FINALLY allow Savage to get out. So Sherri is tougher than the Nasty Boys. That fits. Warrior catches Sherri alone in the cage though and drops her with the gorilla press. Now that was a lot more like it with the aggression and Warrior looked like a monster.

Mooney’s copy of the tape and comb are now huge too. This was dumb. Again.

Overall Rating: C-. There were a few good matches near the end, but the majority of this tape was far from interesting. The “everything is big” deal made it even worse, as you had that between Bravo vs. Hogan and a heck of a lot of Jim Duggan. Granted that was one of the best matches on the whole thing, which was likely more due to Savage and Sherri. It’s not the worst tape, but you shouldn’t spend two hours hoping that things are going to get better.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter and Bluesky @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: January 29, 1996
Location: Stockton Civic Auditorium, Stockton, California
Attendance: 2,904
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler

We’re on the way to the next In Your House, which means we’ll be getting ready for the last stop on the Road To Wrestlemania. The big story continues to be Shawn Michaels’ quest for the WWF Title, though he seems like he’s going to have a stop over with the other Hart Brother on the way to face Bret for the title. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening preview.

Opening sequence.

British Bulldog vs. Diesel

Jim Cornette is here with Bulldog. Diesel powers him around to start and hits a slam but Bulldog gets in a knockdown of his own. Bulldog wraps the leg around the post and cranks away (because this formula worked so well in their disaster of a pay per view match), including a half crab. Cue Yokozuna to ringside as we take a break.

We come back with Bulldog choking and then doing his weird double step stomps to the leg. Diesel gets sent outside where Yokozuna…throws him back in. Back in and Diesel boots him down but Cornette has the referee, leaving Yokozuna to drop a leg. Granted the leg hits Bulldog so it doesn’t exactly work out well but at least he was trying. Cornette freaks out as Diesel gets the pin at 9:38.

Rating: C+. It’s still not a great match, but what matters is that it wasn’t an all time disaster like their match back in October. Keeping it shorter and not having the match drag on forever certainly helped, though they did something similar with the leg work. Diesel needed the win though, as it’s not like Bulldog had much going on at the moment.

It’s off to the Slam Jam where Bret Hart, with a black eye, still wants Diesel in a steel cage match. We run down the rest of the In Your House car, including the newly added Duke Droese vs. Hunter Hearst Helmsley.

Apparently WCW is threatening legal action over the Billionaire Ted skits. Therefore, here’s another one with Ted at a press conference where he won’t answer any questions about his business practices. This stuff is so beyond dumb and nothing but Vince McMahon whining about competition spending money.

Godwinns vs. Bodydonnas

This is Phineas’ debut and Hillbilly Jim and Sunny are here too. Henry runs Skip over to start but Zip comes in with a cheap shot to take him down. A double suplex drops Henry again and Sunny flirts with Jim, leaving Skip to miss a top rope splash. Phineas comes in and gets to clean house, with the Slop Drop finishing Zip at 2:17.

Post match Sunny runs away from…hillbilly things.

We look at Vader’s path of destruction in his rather short WWF career. This includes attacking Gorilla Monsoon last week, which was quite the moment. Of note: McMahon actually uses the term “stable mate” to describe Yokozuna and Vader.

Clarence Mason and Jim Cornette think the suspension is TOTALLY UNFAIR and there is an injunction against the suspension.

You can send in Get Well Soon letters to Monsoon. And I’m sure this won’t be used to restock the WWF’s mailing list.

Vince McMahon brings out the new acting President of the World Wrestling Federation: RODDY PIPER! The fans seem to approve, with Piper asking if he’s Vince’s boss. Piper lists off some of his accomplishments in the 80s but he knows that the wrestlers today are faster and stronger. The difference though is they’re a little confused, with Piper being here to fix things.

There will be no government shutdown when he is President. He pulls out some papers, which contain rules. Vince: “You’ve never lived by rules in your life!” Piper: “Good point!” And he puts the papers back in his pocket. He promises the fans are in good hands, gives Vince an airplane spin, and wraps it up. I’m not sure I have any idea what Piper was saying, but the GOOD POINT part was funny.

Mankind, with his deformed ear, wants us to have a nice day.

Yokozuna vs. Shawn Michaels

Owen Hart and Jim Cornette are here with Yokozuna. Michaels realizes that locking up with him is a really bad idea so he goes with right hands to knock Yokozuna outside. The villains have a meeting on the floor and we take an early break. We come back with Michaels’ top rope moonsault press getting two but Yokozuna whips him hard into the corner.

That sends Michaels crashing out to the floor, where Hart gets in a posting like a good villain should. Back in and we hit the nerve hold (Yokozuna certainly had his favorites) and we take another break. We come back with Michaels avoiding the legdrop but missing a top rope splash. Michaels slugs away, only to get driven into the corner. Hart tries to come in but kicks Yokozuna down by mistake. The superkick gives Michaels the pin at 11:42.

Rating: C. As usual, you know what you’re going to get with Yokozuna at this point and that’s not a good thing. He’s just so big and there is very little that anyone can do against him. Even Michaels was limited here, with the interference into the superkick being about as good as it was going to get. At least Michaels won by pinfall, as it makes him look like he could beat almost anyone. Or at least really big people who could barely move, which has little to do with either Hart brother, but it’s better than nothing.

Post match the Bulldog has to play peacemaker between Yokozuna and Hart. Michaels is caught 4-1 but Diesel runs in for the save. Cornette says his men are perfectly fine and issues the challenge for a tag match next week. Michaels and Diesel seem in to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The Vader stuff is interesting, mainly because you can see what kind of a monster he really is, but at the same time he’s not going to be around for the time being. You also have Roddy Piper around, and that’s only going to be….I have no idea actually (much like whatever he said). The wrestling was good enough, but this is all about getting to Wrestlemania and you can see some pieces coming together, which is exciting enough.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: January 1, 1996
Location: Bob Carpenter Center, Newark, Delaware
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler

It’s a new year and we have a special edition of the show, featuring the Raw Bowl. That means a football themed tag team elimination match, which should be at least interesting. Other than that, we are less than a month away from the Royal Rumble and Shawn Michaels might be on his way back from injury. Let’s get to it.

The opening video hypes up the Raw Bowl, complete with a marching band, cheerleaders, and Lawler in a Cleveland Browns jersey.

Smoking Gunns vs. Yokozuna/Owen Hart vs. Razor Ramon/Savio Vega vs. Sycho Sid/1-2-3 Kid

The Gunns’ Tag Team Titles aren’t on the line. This is an elimination match and the teams have a time out each. They all have jerseys with special numbers (Vega is Uno, the Kid is 1-2-3, Yokozuna is 641 etc) and the ring has a green mat. As a bonus, commentary is making every football reference they can think of because we have a theme going here. Bart and Hart start in three point stances, with Bart drop toeholding him down.

Billy comes in and, since they have to make contact with each other, Bart tries a hiptoss but Billy sticks the landing. The two of them tag in Hart and Yokozuna, the latter of whom drops him with a shoulder. Vega comes in to face Yokozuna and gets dropped as well, so it’s off to Vega vs. Kid. The running spinwheel kick gives Vega two and Ramon comes in to drop Hart with a right hand. The fast tags continue as Sid and Bart come in for a less than thrilling staredown.

Bart actually takes over and hits a suplex before handing it off to Vega. Hart enziguris Vega and Yokozuna comes in to hammer away as we take a break. We come back with Vega still in trouble as Sid comes in to stomp him down. Vega fights back on the Kid and brings in Ramon, but the Kid calls time out. Since we’ve never actually established what calling time out means, Ramon gives Kid the Razor’s Edge anyway.

Ted DiBiase gets on the apron and gets a flag as a result, which again doesn’t seem to have any meaning. Sid uses the distraction to deck Ramon and put Kid on top for the elimination at 13:25 (as the referee didn’t see Vega calling time out). We take another break and come back with Sid hammering on Bart before Hart gets to do the same. Hart misses a top rope splash though and it’s Billy coming in to clean house.

Everything breaks down and Yokozuna accidentally Banzai Drops Hart, giving Billy the pin at 21:04. Sid stomps away on Billy and Kid adds a running kick in the corner for two. Billy fights out of the chinlock but gets booted in the face. A small package gives Billy two on Sid and the comeback is on with some right hands. Sid cuts that off with a chokeslam (Lawler: “Intentional grounding!”) so Kid goes up, only for Ramon to come back and shove him off the top. Billy steals a rollup pin at 25:33.

Rating: C-. This is a good example of a match that might have been a unique concept but it wasn’t the best execution. At the end of the day, this was quite the mess with too many people running around and the football jokes getting old fast. It’s also not a good sign when one of the rules isn’t really explained, with the timeouts not making a ton of sense. The action was ok, but dang this was an idea that needed another draft.

We get a halftime show, with Michael Hayes saying this is a two minute drill. Jim Ross has a word from (not with) Diesel, who promises to beat up Mabel. Hayes talks about the Royal Rumble and runs down the card, again with the football metaphors.

From In Your House: Season’s Beatings.

Henry Godwinn vs. Hunter Hearst Helmsley

This is a Hog Pen Match, meaning the first to throw the other into a hog pen (with hogs) wins. Hillbilly Jim is the guest referee (that doesn’t seem fair) and Godwinn misses the early throw of the slop. Back in and Godwinn takes over, even tying Helmsley in the ropes for some slop to the face. Helmsley takes over and we take a break, coming back with Godwinn being whipped into the hog pen gate.

Helmsley is backdropped onto the edge of the pen but gets back down and drops Godwinn again. They head back to the ring where Godwinn charges into a boot in the corner. A wheelbarrow faceplant gets Godwinn out of trouble and he whips Helmsley over the corner. We take another break and come back with Godwinn hitting a Slop Drop up near the pen. Helmsley is right back with a backdrop into the pen for the win at 8:58 (the original time, which was heavily extended on this broadcast).

Rating: C-. Yeah do you get the concept here? This was supposed to be Godwinn’s specialty match, despite never seeing it before or after this time. At the end of the day though, this was all about who could backdrop the other one into the mud. The idea of seeing Helmsley get dirty was fun, but I’m going to need a bit more than that. Or a lot more really.

Post match Godwinn throws Helmsley into the pen as well, which can’t be good as Helmsley’s back is cut open.

Diesel vs. King Mabel

Diesel whips him into the ropes, hits a big boot, and gets the pin at 8 seconds. Better than Summerslam!

Post match Diesel Jackknifes Sir Mo and poses for his pyro. Diesel leaves with Miss Raw Bowl.

The Brooklyn Brawler gives the Smoking Gunns….the Lombardi Trophy. Ok that’s funny. The Gunns give him a Lipton ice tea bath.

We run down some Royal Rumble participants, including the debuting Vader.

Here’s what’s coming next week.

We wrap it up with Billionaire Ted’s Wrasslin War Room, with the Huckster and Nacho Man saying they can’t do any of these new moves. They can however, POSE!

Overall Rating: D+. Other than avoiding the threat of having to see another long Diesel vs. Mable match, this was a pretty bad week for Raw. The Royal Rumble is coming up and that should help a lot, but there is only so much that can be done when the feature match was a long football themed mess. They were trying something new here, but that doesn’t mean it was a good idea.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Summerslam 1996
Date: August 18, 1996
Location: Gund Arena, Cleveland, Ohio
Attendance: 17,000
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jim Ross, Mr. Perfect

This is not the best time for the WWF as the company has been dealing with the NWO for the last month and a half. Shawn Michaels is doing as much as he can and is doing it again here as he defends the WWF Title against Vader in the main event. Other than that though, we have a Boiler Room Brawl between the Undertaker and Mankind. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Steve Austin vs. Yokozuna

We’ll throw in a bonus here for a somewhat infamous match. Austin hammers away to start and gets knocked down without much trouble. A Samoan drop and legdrop put Austin down and the Banzai Drop is loaded up….but the ropes break and Yokozuna falls down, allowing Austin to get the fast pin at 1:53. Well that got the point across. Vince: “HE IS SO HEAVY!” Yeah that.

The opening video looks at the two main events, which is about fighting the monsters of Mankind and Vader. Makes sense.

Commentary previews the show and a fan actually comes up asking Perfect for an autograph, which he shoves off without saying a word. Even Vince seems to glare at the guy a bit.

Savio Vega vs. Owen Hart

Hart has a cast on his left wrist, with Vince and JR questioning how slowly it has healed. Feeling out process to start with neither getting very far, though the referee does threaten Hart for using the cast. Vega leapfrogs him and sends the cast into various buckles, followed by an armbar.

We cut to the back where Jim Cornette (Hart’s manager) is helping Vader warm up as Vega stays on the arm. There are some fans loudly chanting for Owen, though Vega taking him down by the arm quiets them down a bit. Hart gets up and manages to send him shoulder first into the corner, allowing the stomping to ensue. Vega gets caught in an armbar for a change before Hart switches into an armbar from a different angle for a change of pace. A bite to the leg of all things gets Vega out so Hart ties the arm up in the ropes and slaps him in the face.

Cue Clarence Mason (Jim Cornette’s lawyer) to watch as Vega misses a spinwheel kick but hits a crossbody for two. Back up and Hart’s enziguri connects as Mason is playing cheerleader. Hart’s rollup with feet on the ropes gets two, as does Vega’s rollup. Vega gets up a spinning kick to the face in the corner and a legdrop gets two.

Hart is right back with a kick of his own, followed by a missile dropkick for two of his own. It’s time to go up again but this time Hart gets crotched, setting up a belly to back superplex. Vega seems to land on the cast though, allowing Hart to take it off and knock Vega cold. Somehow the referee didn’t see it, despite it being right in front of his face, and the Sharpshooter goes on to give Hart the win at 13:25.

Rating: C+. Fine enough opener as Hart is always worth a look, though Vega was reaching the end of his usefulness by this point. There’s nothing wrong with having two faster paced guys getting out there to start the show, though trimming a few minutes off here wouldn’t have hurt either. The cast shot at the end didn’t do it any favors either, as there was no reason to believe the referee didn’t see it.

Post match here is Justin Hawk Bradshaw to yell about Vega, who Bradshaw wants to send back to “that island”. Bradshaw gets in a cheap shot on Vega in the aisle to leave him laying again.

Todd Pettingill is scared of being in the boiler room, where he runs into Mankind, who insists that there is no place like home. Undertaker can come in, but beware that he will be seeing a fate worse than death. Mankind licks a pipe.

Tag Team Titles: New Rockers vs. Smoking Gunns vs. Godwinns vs. Bodydonnas

The Gunns, with Sunny, are defending with elimination rules. Skip (of the Bodydonnas) has a neck brace due to a fractured vertebrae. Meanwhile, the Godwinns have Hillbilly Jim, a pig and a basset hound, because Vince McMahon had a thing for hillbillies. Billy and Henry start things off with Henry running him over with a shoulder. A clothesline does it as well and Phineas comes in to throw Zip around.

Billy wants the people to sit down and shut up…so Phineas and Zip tag in both Gunns. Sunny panics as commentary talks about how they have to make contact. This is then proven wrong as Bart tags out to Zip without any issue. Zip takes over on Billy but Jannetty trips Zip down for the pin at 4:03 (likely due to Skip’s injury).

It’s back to Henry to work on Billy’s arm but Cassidy (Al Snow) gets in a cheap shot from the apron to cut Henry down. This means a Partridge Family reference, because the New Rockers are big into that 60s music scene. The Rockers and Gunns start double teamming the Godwinns until some heel miscommunication breaks that down. The Godwinns are fine with going after both of them and we get some double noggin knockers. A quick Slop Drop gets rid of the Rockers at 7:21 and we’re down to two.

Bart hammers on Henry, who is back with a heck of a clothesline to leave both of them down. It’s too far for the tag though and Billy comes in to yell a lot, much to Sunny’s appreciation. Henry gets back with an atomic drop and a World’s Strongest Slam, which is enough for the tag back to Phineas. Everything breaks down and Henry Cactus Clotheslines Bart out to the floor. Phineas hits the Slop Drop on Billy but Bart comes off the top with an ax handle, allowing Billy to steal the pin at 12:21.

Rating: D+. The word that comes to mind here is lifeless. This was a bunch of people going out there and doing their moves to each other until one of them got the win. It wasn’t exciting, it wasn’t interesting and the fans didn’t seem to care. The tag division was such a dead zone around this time and this was a perfect example of why. There was just nothing here and it showed very, very badly.

Post match Sunny brags about the Gunns and unveils a huge poster of herself, her favorite subject.

We look at the WWF taking over Cleveland in recent days. This involves a train racing a carriage to show the fastest way to the arena. Believe it or not, the train wins. Then Jerry Lawler went to a Cleveland Indians practice and tried to learn the spitball. One of the players offered to teach him in exchange for a piledriver. Some wrestlers also helped paint over some graffiti in a nice moment. To top it off, Undertaker and Paul Bearer gave away…a funeral?

British Bulldog vs. Sycho Sid

No Cornette for Bulldog either but Mason is here again. In the back, Sid is glad the fans seem to like him since he came back and is ready to fight. As usual, Sid has the weirdest charisma and it carried him so far. Sid starts fairly fast with a slam to send Bulldog outside, leaving the fans to give us a LET’S GO SID chant. Back in and Sid grabs a headlock but Bulldog fights out and hits the rather impressive delayed vertical suplex.

We hit the chinlock for a bit before Cornette clotheslines him to the floor. Cornette is at least watching the match in the back as Vader warms up (he’s been at it for forty minutes now) and Bulldog drapes him ribs first over the top. The chinlock goes on again but Sid is up rather quickly. A charge misses in the corner though and Bulldog nails the running powerslam. Cue Cornette to yell at Mason though and the distraction means no cover. Another powerslam is loaded up but Sid escapes and hits the chokeslam. The powerbomb gives Sid the pin at 6:26.

Rating: C. Sid was always good for an acceptable enough power match and that’s about what we got here. The bigger deal is between Cornette and Mason, which is about as interesting as you would imagine. That’s a big part of why the company was losing to WCW and it would get even worse: yes WCW had the NWO, but look at what the WWF was using to counter. This was fine, but it’s not like it was anything that you would remember in an hour or so.

Goldust vs. Marc Mero

Goldust has Marlena with him but has an eye for Sable, who is here with Mero. Before the match, Mero talks about not liking the attention Mankind has been giving Sable and promises to make Goldust a falling star. Goldust does his crawling thing to start but Mero isn’t having any of that and knocks him into the corner. A drop toehold into an armbar has Goldust in trouble and Marlena doesn’t seem to care in the slightest.

Commentary talks about Ahmed Johnson’s (latest) injury as Mero works on the arm even more. Goldust fights back and knocks him to the apron, followed by into the barricade in a variety of ways. Cue Mankind to call Sable “Mommy”, get fairly close to her, and then leave. Goldust’s chinlock and clothesline get two but Mero fights up and makes the comeback.

An atomic drop and left hands rock Goldust and Mero leverages him outside. Back in and a slingshot legdrop sets up the debuting Wild Thing (shooting star press)…but Marlena has the referee. The delay lets Goldust kick out, which is amazingly stupid given how they just debuted that kind of a move. A powerslam gives Mero two more but Goldust is back with a quick Curtain Call for the win at 11:01.

Rating: C+. This could have been a lot worse, but the kickout of the Wild Thing was ridiculous. Again: if they want someone or something to get over, stop having it be used in the middle of a match to next to no impact. If you want Goldust to win then fine, but don’t cut the legs off of Mero’s awesome new move in the process. That doesn’t help him at all and the result could have been the same without that boneheaded decision.

Post match Goldust goes after Sable but Mero makes the save.

We look at Intercontinental Champion Ahmed Johnson winning a battle royal to earn a title shot the night after Summerslam on Raw but he was already hurt and then got in a fight with Faarooq. He had a ruptured kidney and as a result, his title is vacant. His future isn’t clear, but he’ll be out for a few months at least. There will be a tournament for the Intercontinental Title and a four man battle royal, consisting of the final four eliminated from the original battle royal, for the title shot. Johnson would return to the ring but he never really recovered.

Here are Sunny and Faarooq, still in the blue gladiator period, for a chat. Faarooq does not like the idea of a tournament because he should be handed the title. Sunny can live with it and promises that Faarooq will win the tournament, because what Sunny wants, she gets. There was no need for this to be on pay per view.

We recap Jake Roberts vs. Jerry Lawler. Roberts was trying to reform his drinking and is now a Christian, with Lawler mocking him endlessly and even pouring alcohol down his throat. Therefore, things are personal.

Jerry Lawler vs. Jake Roberts

Newcomer Mark Henry is on commentary and Lawler brings out a bag of his own, ala the one Roberts tends to bring. Lawler reveals a Baltimore Ravens jersey and pennant (the Cleveland Browns left for Baltimore and became the Ravens, which did not sit well with Cleveland fans). He talks about throwing out the first pitch at the Indians game and the team’s manager begging him to sign a contract.

The Ravens’ owners are here too so don’t ask them for an autograph! Lawler goes for the bag and pulls out Roberts’ partners: Jim Beam! He mocks Roberts’ wife and calls out Henry’s lack of Olympic medals. Not that it matters as he would just get his gold medal bronzed. Henry just sits and takes this, as he doesn’t quite get the thinking yet.

Lawler keeps going with his routine until Roberts finally comes out to cut him off. Hold on though as Lawler offers what he has in his bag in exchange for Roberts NOT taking out what he has in his own bag. Lawler offers a huge bottle of booze, which is enough to bring out the big yellow snake to wrap around Lawler and get us going. Lawler heads to the floor and wants the microphone again but Roberts pulls him back inside to start up the beating.

A slam on the floor plants Lawler again and Roberts mocks him over the booze. Back in and Lawler gets in a cheap shot, allowing him to tie Roberts in the ropes. It’s time to get one of the bottles, but Roberts gets out and hits the short arm clothesline. The referee yells at Roberts though and Lawler hits him in the throat with a bottle, allowing him to pull the tights for the pin at 4:09.

Rating: D. Ignoring the fairly off putting subject matter, the match was hardly anything worth seeing either. The ending felt like the same thing as the opener, as again it was hard to believe that the referee didn’t see it. On top of that you had Henry, who had no business being on commentary with that lack of talking ability. How was that not noticed before the match? Just have him come out and do something after if you want to showcase him, but don’t focus on his weaknesses like that.

Post match Roberts points at his throat so Lawler pours Jim Beam down his throat (rumored to have been real whiskey as a rib). Mark Henry makes the save after an all time nothing performance on commentary.

Bob Backlund is in the crowd doing….Bob Backlund things (he’s a weird guy).

We recap Undertaker vs. Mankind. Undertaker was used to facing monsters but the more you beat on Mankind, the more he came back, making him a weird opponent. They’re still fighting though and this time it’s going to be a brawl in the boiler room, also known as a Boiler Room Brawl.

Undertaker vs. Mankind

Boiler Room Brawl, meaning they start in the boiler room and the winner is the first to get to the ring and retrieve the urn from Paul Bearer. Undertaker slowly walks into the boiler room and even he looks a bit nervous. This leads to some slow walking around, as Undertaker isn’t sure where he is, giving us almost a slasher movie feel.

Mankind finally sneaks up on him with what looks like a board for a bit shot to the back. A trashcan lid (or something that looks like one) to the head gets Mankind off of him and Undertaker sends him into a metal locker. Mankind is back up to send him throat first into a saw horse and they brawl around a bit more. We get some “technical difficulties”, which is likely code for “an edit” as this half was taped in advance.

Undertaker is sent into a machine but comes back with a pipe to knock a trashcan out of Mankind’s hands. Mankind turns a valve to spray Undertaker with hot steam and they stagger around some more. Undertaker grabs a wooden pallet but Undertaker hits him low with a pipe to cut him off again. A ram into a steel wall drops Undertaker again, allowing Mankind to punch him in the face.

With Undertaker down, Mankind climbs a ladder and drops an elbow onto Undertaker and concrete because he’s kind of insane. Mankind starts going for the door but Undertaker pulls him down and we get more technical difficulties. We come back with Undertaker down on the floor and Mankind climbing a ladder. Undertaker sits up and grabs the ladder, sending Mankind crashing down onto a box (which almost went VERY wrong and could have ended his career).

They fight up towards the door and slug it out until Undertaker blasts him with a fire extinguisher. Undertaker gets out the door but gets pulled back in, with Mankind getting out and slamming the door on him. Mankind manages to get away and close a door, stacking a bunch of stuff in front of it. That’s fine with Undertaker, who breaks the door down and follows Mankind down a hall (where other wrestlers are cheering them on, with even Steve Austin getting a look).

Mankind throws coffee on him and then crawls through the entrance to come into the arena for the first time. Undertaker follows him and they make it to ringside, where WWE has brought in TV’s on carts like we’re in English class in the 90s. I mean we were in the 90s here but not so much with the English class thing. Anyway, Mankind hits a Texas piledriver on the exposed concrete.

That’s not enough to stop Undertaker of course and he pulls Mankind back down and goes inside….but Bearer won’t give him the urn. Instead Mankind comes back in and puts on the Mandible Claw as Bearer starts shining the urn. Bearer slaps and stomps at Undertaker (JR is INCENSED), who tries to crawl over to him. A huge urn shot to the head (CRACK) knocks Undertaker silly and Mankind gets the urn to win at 26:45.

Rating: B. Well it was different and rather violent, which is all you can ask for out something like this. I can definitely get the appeal of this kind of match between two people with their history, but it was so different than anything else that either company was doing. The brawl itself was good, but this was all about Bearer turning on Undertaker, as that was one of the biggest partnerships of the 90s. It was a new world for Undertaker, and that is something he had been needing for a long, long time.

Post match Mankind and Bearer leave so the druids come out and carry Undertaker away. Do they just follow Undertaker around in case he gets beaten up?

Jim Cornette says Vader has proven he can beat Shawn Michaels and tonight, Michaels is going to grabbed by the throat, making him sound like an electric kazoo in a Peter Frampton song. If you need a bizarre reference, go to Cornette.

WWF Title: Vader vs. Shawn Michaels

Michaels, with Jose Lothario, is defending and Jim Cornette is here with Vader. Michaels tries to move around to start so Vader hits him in the ribs and drops him with a hard clothesline. A big boot is blocked though and Michaels sweeps the leg, setting up a basement dropkick. Some kicks to the face rock Vader and Michaels low bridges him out to the floor. A baseball slide drops Vader again and Michaels hits a big dive, giving us an image which went on a lot of highlight reels.

Back in and a top rope ax handle sets up a hurricanrana to put Vader down again. Something like a victory roll sends Vader outside again but the slingshot hurricanrana is countered with a nasty powerbomb onto the floor. Vader throws him back inside for a hard suplex as Michaels is in a lot of trouble. The slow beating continues and a rather big backdrop stays on the back.

The beating is so intense that it has Perfect changing his mind about returning to the ring. Vader drops him again with a hard clothesline before grabbing a head and arm choke. That’s broken up so Vader tries to sit on him, only to be cut off with a low blow. Michaels knocks him down and goes up but has to pull out of the top rope elbow as Vader didn’t move as planned. This sends Michaels into an infamous rant about how Vader screwed up, because Michaels in 1996 would have that kind of tantrum on live television.

Back up and Michaels crossbodies him out to the floor, where Vader gorilla presses him onto the barricade. That’s enough for a countout at 13:53, but Cornette says no way, because Michaels isn’t getting out of it that easy.

Michaels seems to agree so Vader goes after him, with Lothario getting between them. That lets Cornette get in a tennis racket shot and they get back inside, where a belly to belly gives Vader two. Michaels manages the flying forearm though and tries the superkick but Cornette grabs his foot. Cornette throws the tennis racket inside so Michaels takes it away and unloads on Vader (with some great sound effects for the DQ at 17:50.

Hold on though as Cornette says Michaels got disqualified on purpose so let’s keep this going and have a real winner. We keep it going with Michaels grabbing a sunset flip but having to avoid a sitdown splash. Now the top rope elbow can connect and the superkick gives Michaels two. The referee gets bumped so Vader’s powerbomb only gets a delayed two. The Vader Bomb is loaded up but Cornette wants the moonsault. That’s enough for Michaels to hit a moonsault press for the win at 22:19.

Rating: B. I liked the story they were telling here with the idea that Vader was overwhelming Michaels but kept giving him chance after chance to escape. That’s the idea of Michaels just finding a way to escape and eventually survive Vader when he went too far. That being said, the tantrum in the middle is just dumb and makes Michaels look pathetic, which he did so often by himself. Otherwise, good main event.

Also of note, this was originally going to be Vader winning the title and ultimately losing it back to Michaels at the Royal Rumble, but Michaels didn’t want to work with Vader so Sid got the spot instead (hence the December In Your House being called “It’s Time” when Vader had nothing to do with the main event.).

Overall Rating: C+. The two main events carry the show as far as it is going to go. The rest of the show ranges from forgettable to bad, which sums up so much of this time for the WWF. They had some talent around, but it was going to take time before the new generation could take the ball. Granted getting Bret Hart back in a few months would help, but this was not a good time for the company, save for the top of the card. You could certainly see that in this show and not in a good way whatsoever.

Ratings Comparison

Steve Austin vs. Yokozuna

Original: N/A
2013 Redo: N/A
2025 Redo: N/A

Owen Hart vs. Savio Vega

Original: B+
2013 Redo: C
2015 Redo: C+

Smoking Gunns vs. Bodydonnas vs. New Rockers vs. Godwinns

Original: B-
2013 Redo: D-
2025 Redo: D+

British Bulldog vs. Sycho Sid

Original: D
2013 Redo: D+
2025 Redo: C

Marc Mero vs. Goldust

Original: C+
2013 Redo: D
2025 Redo: C+

Jerry Lawler vs. Jake Roberts

Original: C-
2013 Redo: D
2025 Redo: D

Mankind vs. Undertaker

Original: A-
2013 Redo: B
2025 Redo: B

Vader vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: A-
2013 Redo: B+
2025 Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: A
2013 Redo: C
2025 Redo: C+

The other two reviews are a bit all over the place, but that original is as rose colored glasses nostalgia as you can get. My goodness that’s nuts.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Wrestling Challenge
Date: October 25, 1986
Location: War Memorial, Rochester, New York
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

We’re still going with a look back at this show, which makes for some very fun moments. It’s such a simpler time and yet the storylines are being advanced to make you want to see what happens at live events. I get why things have changed so much today, but it still makes for such easy to watch television. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here’s what’s coming on the show.

Bob Orton/Don Muraco vs. Mike Kelly/Nick Kiniski

There’s quite a bit to unpack here actually. Muraco and Orton have Jimmy Hart and Mr. Fuji with them and Orton is in a kilt to mock Roddy Piper, along with coming to the ring to his theme song. Kiniski is the son of Gene, minus anything resembling the talent or interest. Kiniski gets taken into the corner and powered around by Orton, allowing Kelly to come in. Muraco (with an amazing beard) Tombstones Kelly for the pin at 2:11. Kelly would be a bit better when he changed his name to Shane Douglas.

We get a Wrestlers’ Rebuttal from Bobby Heenan and King Harley Race, with Heenan complaining about people not kneeling before royalty. And then the other wrestlers think they belong in the same ring as Race! What rudeness!

Hillbilly Jim vs. Al Navarro

Navarro bounces off of him to start and a hammerlock doesn’t seem to work much better. A big boot and the bearhug finish for Jim at 2:32, a lot of which was spent walking around before they got started.

As Jim leaves, he is given a picture of the new WWF Magazine with Miss Elizabeth, which he kisses. So he’s chosen death.

Jake Roberts says Ricky Steamboat beat him in a fluke and he’s not afraid of anyone. Bring on George Steele, Tito Santana or Koko B. Ware. If you bring Frankie B. Ware around his snake, Frankie B. Gone soon. Roberts isn’t afraid of anyone, and he wants the Intercontinental Title. Once you have that, you can face Hulk Hogan anytime you want. So why not just go after Hogan? Either way, he warns Randy Savage to be ready.

Butch Reed vs. Don Driggers

Slick handles Reed’s introduction and we get an insert promo from Junkyard Dog, who says there is nothing natural about the Natural. Reed shoves Driggers down to start and gets in the posing, which works so well that he does it again. Some forearms put Driggers down again and Reed plants him with a slam. The middle rope clothesline finishes for Reed at 2:41.

The Honky Tonk Man talks about being up for 48 hours and rocking all night. He’s ready to strut n stroll and rock n roll. And his favorite song is Great Balls Of Fire. This was a parody right? It has to be. I would say no one could be that stupid but….yeah.

The Machines tried to buy a compact car but asked about the price in yen. Why they’re in their wrestling gear isn’t clear. Of course they’re not quite able to fit into the car and hilarity…well is teased but it doesn’t ensue.

Dino Bravo vs. Sivi Afi

Bravo, with dark hair, is Johnny V.’s newest star. Bravo takes him down without much trouble and hits a clothesline. A hard chop puts Afi down for a knee to the head as the dominance is on. Afi misses a charge into the corner and a fairly nasty belly to back suplex finishes for Bravo at 2:38.

It’s time for the Snake Pit, with the Honky Tonk Man as the special guest. Roberts asks if he’s a strong and successful man like his mama wanted. Honky Tonk Man isn’t sure what Roberts would know what it means to make a mama happy. Roberts doesn’t see Honky Tonk’s name on any walls so has he ever been this close to a real man? That doesn’t work for Honky Tonk, who thinks anyone who plays with a snake is a sick human being. Honky Tonk isn’t scared of Roberts or the snake but leaves anyway.

Killer Bees vs. Moondog Spot/Jimmy Jack Funk

What a weird heel team. Heenan wants to know why the Bees are introduced in the masks, get their names announced, and then take the masks off. Monsoon brushes it off despite Heenan having a totally fair question. Blair works on Spot’s arm to start as we get an insert interview from Dave Hebner talking about how hard it is to be a referee, which doesn’t make Danny Davis look good.

It’s off to Brunzell, who gets slammed down by Funk as the villains actually take over. A middle rope fist drop gets two as Heenan insists he never makes excuses if his men lose a match. Brunzell’s jumping knee gets two as everything breaks down. An atomic drop/dropkick combination finishes Funk at 3:36.

Rating: C. Not bad here, with the Bees being yet another team added to the already awesome division. It says a lot when the Bees, who would be at the top of almost any tag division, are in the middle of the pack at this point. They’re good at what they do and this was the kind of match that helps them get established as a bigger deal.

Ricky Steamboat, in a sweet Saturday Night’s Main Event hat, says don’t do drugs.

Back in 1984, Kamala, with Freddie Blassie and Kim Chee (called Friday here), was on Tuesday Night Titans with Blassie talking about how brutal Kamala can be. Then Kamala was presented with a live chicken, sending Vince McMahon into quite the rant. Not on THIS show of course. They really couldn’t do something new here and needed to go back two years for such a clip?

Kamala vs. Tony Nando

Kamala, with the Wizard and Kim Chee, chops him down to start and chokes near the apron. A big boot sets up the splash for the pin on Nando at 1:25.

After the match, we see a photo from the previously mentioned Tuesday Night Titans with Kamala looking at the camera with feathers around his face.

Ricky Steamboat is ready for another round with Jake Roberts. When it comes to becoming a champion, just do as Hulk Hogan told you to do and say your prayers, take your vitamins and train hard. Steamboat would love to be the Intercontinental Champion because it makes you a top contender to the WWF Title. Elizabeth is mentioned but George Steele runs in to say Savage is USING Elizabeth. Steele worries about her and Steamboat is going to beat Savage. Maybe Steele will hurt Savage too!

Here’s what’s coming next week.

Roll the highlights.

Overall Rating: C+. I liked this one more than the previous week, as it felt like it was starting to build to some bigger things. You can see wrestlers starting to talk about each other and that should make for a good slate of house shows down the line. That has me wondering what we’re going to see and these shows are the appetizers on the way to the more important stuff.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Wrestlemania III
Date: March 29, 1987
Location: Pontiac Silverdome, Pontiac, Michigan
Attendance: 93,173
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Jesse Ventura
America The Beautiful: Aretha Franklin

Well if you insist. This might be the show that I’ve seen more than any other in history as I regularly put it on to go to sleep, as it’s just such pleasant viewing. It’s one of the biggest shows of all time with the biggest main event in history. Throw in…oh come on. It’s Wrestlemania III. You know what this is all about so let’s get to it.

And in case it needs to be addressed again, the exact attendance of the show is A WHOLE LOT OF PEOPLE. Be it 78,000 or 93,173 or whatever it is in the middle, the WWF packed an NFL stadium and it’s a show that is still talked about going on forty years later. If you’re trying to argue that the attendance being ONLY pushing 80,000, you’re probably reading the wrong thing right now.

We open with the first (of a bunch) iconic shot of the show, with the camera near the top of the stadium and panning across to show all of the people. That’s one of those famous shots in the company’s history and it’s no wonder that it’s been played so many times.

Vince McMahon introduces Aretha Franklin to sing America The Beautiful, with just a hint of the Mr. McMahon voice coming out.

We meet commentary, plus special guests Mary Hart (from Entertainment Tonight) and Bob Uecker (famously not very good baseball player who wound up being a great TV personality and broadcaster).

Can-Am Connection vs. Bob Orton/Magnificent Muraco

Mr. Fuji is here with the villains and the Connection (Tom Zenk/Rick Martel) are basically the prototype for Strike force. Muraco shoves Zenk away to start and actually gets shouldered down. It’s off to Martel, who blind tags his way out of a headlock, setting up a double monkey flip. A double hiptoss drops Orton as well as they’re off to a fast start.

Back up and Orton gets slammed into an armbar from Zenk as Monsoon says Orton has “excellence of execution”. Orton gets a full nelson but Muraco’s cheap shot hits Orton by mistake to give Zenk two. Zenk comes in to work on the arm as well but a quick knee cuts Zenk down. Back up and a collision gives us a double knockdown, allowing the tag back to Martel. Everything breaks down and the villains are sent into each other, with Muraco backdropping Orton. A double dropkick sets up a crossbody (with a trip) to pin Muraco at 5:38.

Rating: C+. This would have been a dark match in more modern times but for this era, it was a great way to start things off. They didn’t waste time and got out of there pretty quickly with the young, pretty boy team beating the villains. Orton and Muraco were never really in control for any extended period of time and it was just shy of a squash. Fun opener here, even if it doesn’t mean much of anything.

We recap Hercules vs. Billy Jack Haynes, which is a battle of the full nelson between two strong guys.

Hercules, with Bobby Heenan, is ready to use his strength to show Haynes that he is the true master of the full nelson. Heenan insists that it is actually Billy “Jerk” Haynes.

Billy Jack Haynes vs. Hercules

Bobby Heenan is here with Hercules and since the teams were in the ring to start the opener, we get the first glimpse of the ring carts here. They go nose to nose to start and Haynes backs him into the corner, where the referee gets between them in something you don’t often see. A cheap shot cuts Haynes off but Hercules has to bail from the threat of a full nelson.

One heck of a clothesline drops Haynes and things slow down. A backdrop and hard whip into the corner have Haynes’ back in more trouble, though Monsoon wonders why he isn’t working on the neck to set up the full nelson. Hercules covers him off a suplex but pulls up at two, which has Gorilla and Ventura mildly freaking out.

Back up and the full nelson, or at least something close to it (the fingers aren’t locked) goes on, with Haynes going down anyway. Two arm drops trigger the comeback so Hercules decks him from behind in a smart move. A double clothesline leaves both of them down before Haynes makes the clothesline comeback. The full nelson goes on but Hercules pulls them through the ropes for a crash outside. Haynes gets the full nelson on again but it’s a double countout at 7:53.

Rating: C-. Not much to this one as it was a fairly slow power match with the result not really giving us anything. It’s still strange to see something like this at Wrestlemania but it’s a rather different era. The good thing though is that they didn’t stay out there very long, which takes away a lot of the issues. Haynes is a guy who had a great look but never went very far in the WWF before bailing (as he did multiple times in various companies).

Post match Heenan knees Haynes in the back so the chase is on, allowing Hercules to get in a chain shot and bust Hayes open (notice Haynes blading on camera). The full nelson goes on as well, likely setting up house show rematches.

King Kong Bundy, with his midgets (that’s what they’re called on this show so we’ll stay with that for now) threatens to crush various people.

Hillbilly Jim promises to protect his smaller friends, who he picks up for a beard pull.

Hillbilly Jim/Little Beaver/Haiti Kid vs. King Kong Bundy/Lord Littlebrook/Little Tokyo

Bob Uecker is on commentary and actually treats it seriously, clarifying that the sizes have to match (not so much the age, as Beaver was 53 here while Tokyo was 58, compared to the 35 year old Jim and the 32 year old Bundy). Tokyo headlocks Kid over to start and it’s a four way criss cross until Beaver and Kid do their rowboat spot. We settle down to Tokyo vs. Beaver as Uecker seems rather happy to be here.

Littlebrook comes in as Ventura wants to see Bundy crush one of the midgets. Beaver runs over to get in a cheap shot on Bundy, who is tagged in from the apron, which isn’t exactly legal. Beaver’s dropkick doesn’t do much to Bundy so it’s off to Jim for a clothesline and jumping elbow. The group pin gets two and Bundy grabs a front facelock on Jim, with Beaver coming in for the save. That’s enough for Bundy, who slams Beaver down and drops the big elbow, which is enough for the DQ at 3:24.

Rating: C. This is one of those matches where there isn’t much to get. It’s designed to be comedy or for the kids in the audience, which is fine when they just do something goofy. At the same time, it’s hard to fathom how far Bundy fell after headlining the show the previous year. In something a lot more serious, unfortunately the big elbow to Beaver led to the end of his in-ring career, as he never wrestled again.

Randy Savage isn’t going to let Elizabeth be interviewed by Mary Hart and offers to take any questions Hart may have. Hart to Elizabeth: “Is it always this way?” Savage rushes Elizabeth out of there but tells Hart that his phone number is on his license plate. Hart: “You are a real charmer.” And an incredible star, as the charisma here was incredible.

We recap Harley Race vs. Junkyard Dog. Race is the King of the WWF and wants the Dog to bow to him but Dog wasn’t interested. Instead, Race, with Bobby Heenan, tried to force him to bow. That’s enough to set up a match, but I’d be more annoyed at the crown having a string to help hold it on. They can’t get something a bit more customized?

Race promises to make Dog bow and the Queen (Fabulous Moolah) is told to keep the crown.

The Dog thinks Race has been on the throne too long.

Junkyard Dog vs. Harley Race

Bob Uecker runs off commentary because he is apparently in love with Moolah. As….someone must have been. Dog slugs away to start and knocks him outside, followed by a headbutt back inside. Race hits a headbutt to the ribs and they go outside, where Race misses a falling headbutt.

A clothesline sends Race over the top and back inside, followed by another to put him outside again, with Race’s face landing on the apron. Back in again and Race fights out of an abdominal stretch and hits a falling headbutt, which huts himself again. Dog whips him over the corner and hits some headbutts on all fours. Heenan offers a distraction though and Race grabs a belly to belly for the pin at 3:19.

Rating: C. This was another short one and somehow might have set a record for the most headbutts attempted in any match. The interesting thing here is that it felt like Race was doing something beneath him, but you could still see how graceful he was with some of his bumping. It made Dog, who wasn’t exactly great on his best day, look that much better here, which is quite the feat.

Post match Race puts on the robe and sits in his chair, which is quite the visual. Dog does bow, then hits Race with the chair and steals the robe and crown, because he’s a sore loser.

Hulk Hogan is not happy with people suggesting that he is ready to take his last ride. At some point you have to face the truth, which is what Andre The Giant will do today. Andre is going to have to face every Hulkamaniac. Hogan: “They say if the dirty air doesn’t get you, the politicians will.” After that line that I have not understood for over thirty seven years, Hogan promises to win.

The Dream Team says don’t worry about Dino Bravo being in their corner.

Rougeau Brothers vs. Dream Team

The Dream Team, with Luscious Johnny V and Dino Bravo, gets an entrance while the Rougeaus are already in the ring. Ventura praises Greg Valentine’s new robe. To be fair, that is a rather snazzy robe. As usual, Ventura can’t remember which Rougeau is which and asks Monsoon in an exchange that illustrates why they sounded like normal people from time to time. Ventura can’t remember which Rougeau he’s seeing, Monsoon says it’s Raymond (the one with the mustache) and Ventura sounds grateful. How often do you see that in wrestling?

Anyway, Raymond takes over on Valentine to start and hands it off to Jacques, who misses a spinning middle rope crossbody, allowing Valentine to drop some elbows, as he is known to do. Beefcake comes in to stomp away and a top rope forearm to the head/backbreaker combination hits Jacques.

Bobby Heenan joins commentary and says he is 2/2 today as Valentine gets the Figure Four, sending Jacques to the rope. Monsoon calls out Heenan for King Kong Bundy’s loss, but Heenan doesn’t “deal with midgets”. Jacques gets over to Raymond for the tag and Le Bombe de Rougeau connects but Bravo gets in a cheap shot, allowing Valentine to steal the pin at 4:05.

Rating: C. Another short match which didn’t mean much but hearing Monsoon and Heenan arguing is always worth a look. It’s another match where they don’t have much of a story and it’s just two teams doing things, which is acceptable enough. Anytime you can get Le Bombe de Rougeau, it’s a pretty good day. Well maybe not for the Rougeaus, but at least it was entertaining while it lasted.

Post match Beefcake gets left in the ring for some reason with the other villains leaving. No one exactly gets what’s going on with Beefcake and…yeah it doesn’t make a ton of sense. Unless he’s just having a sudden crisis of conscience, it comes out of nowhere, at least with what we’re seeing here.

We recap Roddy Piper vs. Adrian Adonis in Piper’s farewell match, which is hair vs. hair. Adonis had paid off Piper’s bodyguard Bob Orton and Piper was livid, even more so when Piper’s Pit was turned into the Flower Shop when Piper was gone making a movie. Piper came back and wrecked the place, earning a beating from Adonis and Orton. On top of that, Adonis sprayed perfume in Piper’s face, with Ventura thinking it was due to a bad case of halitosis. This was a heck of a hot feud, as Piper looked like he wanted to kill Adonis.

Piper says he’s not going out like a coward. No defeat and no surrender. Piper was bringing the fire here.

Adonis, with Jimmy Hart, is ready to cut Piper’s hair.

Roddy Piper vs. Adrian Adonis

Adonis has Jimmy Hart with him. Piper has to walk to the ring (as his cart stalled), which just feels appropriate. They start fast with Piper whipping him with a belt but Adonis takes it away and unloads on Piper as well. A clothesline sends Adonis to the floor so Piper drags him, and Hart, inside for a double noggin knocker. Hart gets whipped into Adonis for a crash out to the floor. Ventura: “THIS IS TERRIBLE! THIS IS HORRIBLE!”

Back in and Piper unloads on Adonis before throwing Hart onto him again. Adonis rakes away at the chest and drops him with a shot to the face as Hart is barely able to stand on the floor. An elbow sends Piper to the floor and Adonis sends him into a table so Hart gets in a cheap shot of his own. Adonis hammers away so Piper tells him to bring it, only for Hart to spray him with perfume.

Good Night Irene (sleeper) goes on and Piper can’t shake it off or break it with some rams into the corner. The arm drops twice and Adonis just lets go, with the arm not going down yet. Cue Brutus Beefcake (whose hair Adonis had accidentally cut earlier in the year) to wake Piper up so Adonis swings his hedge clippers, which bounce off the ropes and hit himself in the head. Piper grabs his own sleeper for the win at 6:55.

Rating: B. No it might not be good, but this is an absolute blast of a match with Piper being so over the top and having such a good time with Hart and Adonis that it’s just so much fun. Piper was on his way out and gets to do one more entertaining match because he earned the whole thing. It would have been interesting to see him as a good guy for a longer time in his prime but going out on a high note like this is good too.

Post match Beefcake cuts a bunch of Adonis’ hair, with Piper throwing it around. Adonis wakes up and is shown his haircut, which sends Adonis into a frenzy. It doesn’t really get him very far as Piper keeps skipping away, leaving Adonis to crash out to the floor. Piper celebrates and a fan runs into the ring, gets a hug, and is promptly handcuffed while Piper leaves in a funny moment. Of note: the hedge clippers that Adonis used would become Beefcake’s trademark as he became the Barber after the match. Throw in Adonis being the one to give Piper his trademark leather jacket and it’s quite the influential feud.

Jesse Ventura has left commentary to be presented to the crowd, with Bob Uecker accusing him of going to be with Fabulous Moolah.

Ventura is indeed presented to the crowd before the next match, which he would do for the next two Wrestlemanias for some reason.

The Hart Foundation and Jimmy Hart are ready for war with DANNY DAVIS as their new member.

Hart Foundation/Danny Davis vs. British Bulldogs/Tito Santana

Bob Uecker and Mary Hart are on commentary. So this is ALL about Davis, who was a referee who cost the Bulldogs and Santana their titles through being all evil. He was promptly suspended “for life plus ten years” (he refereed again later on because wrestling) so Jimmy Hart has turned him into a wrestler, making his debut here.

The fans are desperate to see Davis get absolutely massacred here and he has absolutely insane heat. The good guys get to do their entrance and Uecker AGAIN does a great job of setting up Monsoon to recap the story, treating this totally seriously (in his own fun way) and being as good of a celebrity broadcaster as you’ll ever find in wrestling. Matilda (the bulldog mascot) chases the villains to the floor and Santana jumps Neidhart before we officially get going.

Ventura takes Matilda to the back as Bret is dropped face first out of the corner. Neidhart comes in as Mary Hart goes on a rather annoying rant about how she is NOT related to Jimmy. Santana leapfrogs Neidhart and hands it off to Smith to hammer away. Smith avoids Bret’s elbow and hands it off to Dynamite, who gets headbutted down. Dynamite gets punched in the corner and Neidhart adds a cheap shot as Monsoon says that Bret, just like Bob Orton, has Excellence Of Execution.

Something close to a Demolition Decapitator hits Dynamite and it’s off to Davis for a few stomps. He immediately hands it off to Bret with the biggest grin, because he knows how to be a heel. Unfortunately Mary is asking what Dynamite has to do to get out of the ring in this TAG match. Davis comes back in for two more stomps and gets out again with his big grin. Bret tries a slingshot but Davis lands on raised knees, allowing Santana to come in and hammer on Davis, with the fans going NUTS.

A backdrop sets up the flying forearm before Santana just unloads on him with some right hands. Neidhart breaks up the Figure Four so Smith comes in for a heck of a clothesline and a jumping Tombstone. That’s not enough for the cover so Smith grabs a suplex to drop Davis again. The running powerslam gets two with Neidhart making the save. Everything breaks down and Jimmy slips in the megaphone so Davis can knock Smith out for the win at 8:53.

Rating: B. While it might be stretching the idea of having Davis escape one more time, sweet goodness the crowd reactions here were incredible. Davis was getting absolutely molten heat here and the fans were dying to see him get crushed. I could have gone for seeing the good guys win, but stretching it out wasn’t the worst idea.

Bobby Heenan (now in the famous white tuxedo) promises that Hulkamania is over tonight because Andre The Giant will be the new World Champion. Heenan’s confidence here is even higher than usual as he really feels like this is the be all and end all for him.

Koko B. Ware vs. Butch Reed

Slick is here with Reed as we have a bit of a Mid-South reunion here. Ware tries to pick up the pace to start by running over Reed and then dropkicks him out to the floor. Back in and Reed drops Ware to take over and we look at Frankie the parrot trying to eat the camera. Ware comes back with some right hands and a dropkick before a small package gets two. Back up and Ware tries a crossbody but Reed rolls through and grabs the tights for the pin at 3:38.

Rating: D+. Not much to see here with the two of them just having a quick match without going very far. Reed felt like he could have been something bigger in the company but it never quite panned out. Having him around here was fine, but there is only so much you can do in a match this short with nothing going on.

Post match Slick goes after Ware but Tito Santana pops up to rip off Slick’s suit as he and Ware have been having issues lately. Santana and Ware clear out Reed too.

We recap Ricky Steamboat vs. Randy Savage for the Intercontinental Title. Savage injured Steamboat with an ax handle to send Steamboat throat first into the barricade and then crushed his throat with the ring bell. Steamboat returned anyway and wanted revenge while teaming up with George Steele, who had been feuding with Savage for several months.

Savage is ready to beat Steamboat and get him out of the ring because he is the lord and master. “History beckons the Macho Man.” What an amazing line.

Steamboat says they are going to meet like titans and the Dragon is going to scorch Savage’s back.

Intercontinental Title: Randy Savage vs. Ricky Steamboat

Steamboat, with George Steele, is challenging and Miss Elizabeth is with Savage, who gets a face pop so big that even commentary has to acknowledge it. They lock up to start and Steamboat shoves him to the floor as Ventura says Steamboat was able to come back because he has a lot of throat. The armdrags have Savage in trouble and Steamboat lifts him up with a choke.

Back in and Savage gets in a kick of his own as even Monsoon has to admit that Savage is pretty incredible. Steamboat comes back with a crank on the arm and snaps it over the top but Savage elbows him in the face. Savage drops a knee for two but gets sent face first into the buckle. A crossbody gives Steamboat two and it’s another armdrag into some shoulder blocks. Savage comes back with a jumping knee to the back but Steamboat is fine enough to skin the cat.

That just earns him a clothesline over the top because as good as Steamboat is, Savage is incredibly smart in his own right. Another running knee sends Steamboat crashing over the barricade, with Steele having to help him back over while the referee yells at Savage. Ventura gets on Monsoon, who wanted managers to be less hands on. Monsoon: “That’s not a manager. That’s a friend.” I feel terrible for this one but screw off with that nonsense Monsoon.

The top rope ax handle drills Steamboat and an atomic drop gets two back inside. Steamboat flips out of a belly to back suplex and backdrops Savage over the top for a heck of a bump to the floor. Back in and Steamboat dives off the top and over the referee to chop Savage in the head (I love that shot). Steamboat starts firing off the chops and Savage is knocked outside again. A sunset flip and some rollups get two each on Savage as even Ventura has to admit that this match is incredible.

Steamboat catapults him face first into the post for two but Savage pulls the tights to send Steamboat shoulder first into the post. Back up and a reversed whip takes out the referee and Savage hits his signature clothesline (where he lands on his back for some reason). The top rope elbow connects….and there’s no referee. Savage goes to grab the bell but Steele shoves him off the top, with Savage crashing down onto said bell (close enough). Back up and Steamboat small packages him for the pin and the title at 14:31 in one of the most famous finishes in history.

Rating: A+. I mean…what do you want me to say? Yeah it might be a cliche to say this is one of the best matches ever but that’s exactly what it is. You have two of the best of all time in a match that was way ahead of its time with the fast pace and near falls. There’s nothing close to bad in the whole thing and it feels like it is one of the biggest showdowns you’ll ever see. In short, this is a classic for a reason, or in this case, multiple reasons.

Savage goes back in the card with his head in his hands, completely destroyed.

Jake Roberts, with Alice Cooper, is ready to get revenge on Honky Tonk Man for hitting him with a guitar.

Honky Tonk Man thinks the fans want to hear his song rather than something by Alice Cooper.

Honky Tonk Man vs. Jake Roberts

Jimmy Hart and Alice Cooper are here too. Roberts jumps him to start and knocks him outside before the Elvis suit can come off. The beating goes to the floor, with Roberts getting in a slam as the beating is on in a hurry. Back in and Roberts charges into a knee in the corner but he’s right back with the short arm clothesline. The threat of a DDT sends Honky Tonk bailing to the floor, where he manages to post Roberts for a breather.

Back in and the middle rope fist drop hits Roberts, followed by an elbow to the face (by “Honk” according to Monsoon). The Shake Rattle And Roll (he couldn’t get past the Shake) is broken up and Roberts is back with an atomic drop. There’s a backdrop to Honky Tonk and he gets tied in the ropes for some right hands. The DDT is teased but Hart grabs the leg, allowing Honky Tonk to get a rollup (with a grab of the rope) for the pin at 7:05.

Rating: C. There was only so much to get out of this one as Honky Tonk wasn’t going to have the best matches and this was more about Roberts’ revenge. That’s not what he got anyway, but it’s not like Roberts was ever going to win many big matches. Honky Tonk Man had something much bigger coming, but you wouldn’t have bet on it here…which is kind of the entire point.

Post match Hart and Cooper get in the ring, with Roberts holding Hart back so Cooper can throw Damien on him. This show has been very full of sore losers.

Gene Okerlund announces the attendance record.

Iron Sheik/Nikolai Volkoff vs. Killer Bees

Slick is with the villains and is still in his torn suit. Volkoff sings the Soviet national anthem, which draws out newcomer Jim Duggan (yes the 2×4 has an American flag) to break it up because THIS IS AMERICA. The villains jump them from behind to get started but are sent into the corners to cut them off. Blair comes in to work on Sheik’s arm and the Bees take turns working on said arm. Everything breaks down as the ring is full of trash from the anthem.

Sheik elbows Brunzell down and it’s back to Volkoff for a bearhug (which has Brunzell looking like he’s being tortured to death). A suplex (almost a Jackhammer) gives Sheik two but Brunzell knees him down. The referee misses the tag thanks to a distraction though and everything breaks down. Sheik camel clutches Brunzell so Duggan blasts him in the back with the 2×4 for the DQ at 5:51.

Rating: D. This is a good example of a match that did not need to be here and served little more than to stretch things out until the main event was ready to go. It really didn’t need to happen and it’s not like there was much going on anyway. If nothing else, it continues to amaze me that Sheik and Volkoff were a team for so long. They won the Tag Team Titles two years ago at the first Wrestlemania and they’re still here.

Post match Duggan says he’ll do that every time Volkoff tries to disgrace America. As Ventura puts it: why are the Bees ok with Duggan costing them a match? Shouldn’t they be mad?

Andre The Giant is ready to be the World Champion and Bobby Heenan agrees.

We recap Hulk Hogan vs. Andre The Giant. They had been friends for years but then Bobby Heenan got in Andre’s head and asked why he never got a title shot from Hogan. Andre snapped (well as much as he’s ever going to snap) and tore the shirt off of Hogan’s back (ripping his cross off by mistake in the process), challenging him for the title at “the Wrestlemania.” Hogan agreed and it’s time for the biggest match of all time.

Hogan is ready and poses.

Bob Uecker, the guest ring announcer and Mary Hart, the guest timekeeper, are brought out.

WWF Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Andre The Giant

Andre, with Bobby Heenan, is challenging. Hogan’s entrance is rather incredible, with him getting the big spotlight and walking all the way to the ring as Ventura does the tale of the tape (and even admits that Hogan’s biceps are “phenomenal”). Ventura: “This is the biggest match in the history of professional wrestling.” That’s pretty accurate, yep. The bell rings and we get the staredown, which is your next iconic shot of the show.

Hogan wastes no time in Hulking Up before hammering away and trying a slam, only for Andre to fall onto him. This gives us a VERY close two, which was controversial enough that it enough for the feud to continue for another year. Andre slowly starts in on the back and hits a pair of slams before stepping over Hogan to keep him down. Some whips into the corner make it worse as Andre is barely having to do much here, mainly because he couldn’t. Andre misses a headbutt and hits the corner, allowing Hogan to hammer away for the hope spot.

Ten straight rams into the buckle have Andre staggered but he gets the boot up to cut off the charge. The bearhug goes on for awhile (I still don’t get the criticism that this kills the match as it’s really not that long) but Hogan slugs away for the break. A running shoulder has Andre staggered again until he hits a big chop. Andre boots him out to the floor but accidentally headbutts the post.

Hogan, ever the hero, pulls back the floor mats and tries a piledriver, which is easily blocked with a backdrop. Back in (I can give you the commentary word for word from here on) and Andre misses a big boot, allowing Hogan to drop him with a clothesline. Heenan is beside himself as Hogan Hulks Up and slams Andre (there’s your other iconic shot) to drop the leg and retain the title at 11:32. Ventura: “UNBELIEVABLE!” If you could sway Jesse, you could get anyone.

Rating: B-. No it isn’t particularly good, no it isn’t anything that hasn’t been done better and no it was never going to much better than that. What mattered here was giving Hogan the win against the biggest (non-Sammartino) name of the previous generation. It’s a VERY simple story (Hogan gets hurt, he gets beaten down, he survives long enough to Hulk Up and uses the power of Hulkamania to slay the Giant) but it was a good enough stadium match to get by. That and the whole “it’s the biggest match ever” kind of helps.

Andre and Heenan leave in the card, with Heenan’s head in his hands as he realizes he’s lost everything. Hogan poses a lot and gets in his cat, which is elevated so more people can see him in a smart move.

Ventura and Gorilla wrap up the show and we get a stills package to end the show, set to Aretha Franklin.

Overall Rating: B. I’ve watched this show more times than I can count for over thirty years and that’s because it just works. It’s a perfect example of a show that flows so well, with only a few spots that drag. The show has twelve matches and two of them break nine minutes. Even the worst matches on the card are out of there quickly enough that they don’t do much damage, which is part of the reason why the show is just over three hours.

At the same time, this was the show that set the standard for what Wrestlemania would become. Rather than a big house show or whatever the second edition was, it was “here’s a huge main event with enough on the undercard to fill a stadium”. That would become the standard for Wrestlemania down the line and it started here, making it one of the most important shows of all time.

Overall, Wrestlemania III is a show that changed the way the wrestling world worked and it still works to this day. You could tell that everyone was wanting it to go as well as it could and for once they actually pulled it off. No the matches aren’t all great, but it has that huge feeling that you cannot fake. It’s a show that will always work and I was enjoying it all over again here, which isn’t something you see very often. Check it out again if you haven’t in awhile, or even if you have really, as it’s always worth the time.

Ratings Comparison

Can-Am Connection vs. Bob Orton/Don Muraco

Original: B+
2013 Redo: B-
2015 Redo: C+
2025 Redo: C+

Billy Jack Haynes vs. Hercules

Original: C-
2013 Redo: D+
2015 Redo: C
2025 Redo: C-

Hillbilly Jim/Haiti Kid/Little Beaver vs. King Kong Bundy/Little Tokyo/Lord Littlebrook

Original: F
2013 Redo: D+
2015 Redo: D
2025 Redo: C

Harley Race vs. Junkyard Dog

Original: D+
2013 Redo: D
2015 Redo: D
2025 Redo: C

Rougeau Brothers vs. Dream Team

Original: D+
2013 Redo: C-
2015 Redo: D+
2025 Redo: C

Roddy Piper vs. Adrian Adonis

Original: C+
2013 Redo: C+
2015 Redo: C+
2025 Redo: B

Hart Foundation/Danny Davis vs. British Bulldogs/Tito Santana

Original: C
2013 Redo: C-
2015 Redo: D+
2025 Redo: B

Koko B. Ware vs. Butch Reed

Original: N/A
2013 Redo: D
2015 Redo: D
2025 Redo: D+

Randy Savage vs. Ricky Steamboat

Original: A+
2013 Redo: A+
2015 Redo: A+
2025 Redo: A+

Jake Roberts vs. Honky Tonk Man

Original: C
2013 Redo: C
2015 Redo: C-
2025 Redo: C

Killer Bees vs. Iron Sheik/Nikolai Volkoff

Original: D
2013 Redo: C-
2015 Redo: D+
2025 Redo: D

Hulk Hogan vs. Andre the Giant

Original: A
2013 Redo: B
2015 Redo: D+
2025 Redo: B-

Overall Rating

Original: B+
2013 Redo: A+
2015 Redo: C+
2025 Redo: B

Sweet goodness I’ve been all over the place with this show over the years.

 

 

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All American Wrestling
Date: April 8, 1990
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jesse Ventura, Bobby Heenan, Gorilla Monsoon, Hillbilly Jim
Hosts: Gene Okerlund, Hillbilly Jim

This popped on my YouTube recommendations and I can always go for some 1990 WWF. We are a week removed from Wrestlemania but it’s hard to say how much of this was taped in advance. If there is a studio portion, I’m sure we’ll hear all about it between a parade of squashes. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Gene Okerlund and Hillbilly Jim welcome us to the show and tell us about the Ultimate Warrior winning the WWF Title. Jim insists that Hulkamania will live forever though. They run down the card and we’re ready to go.

Dusty Rhodes vs. Don Stevens

Commentary goes over Dusty’s various careers, with Vince mentioning that Dusty was a “son of a plumber.” A dropkick and suplex set up a chinlock, followed by the big elbow to finish Stevens at 2:08.

The hosts talk about Wrestlemania VI and Hillbilly Jim’s hair. Because reasons.

House show ads, which are always cool to see.

SPECIAL REPORT!

Ultimate Warrior beat Hulk Hogan to win the WWF Title at Wrestlemania VI and we see some still shots. They make sure to clarify that Hogan is STILL awesome. Of note: we’re told that Jack Tunney will NOT sanction a rematch because it would be too physically grueling on both of them. That’s quite a nice way to cover up why Hogan never got a rematch, though you would think it would have been mentioned more often.

Orient Express vs. Omar Atlas/Paul Roma

Mr. Fuji is here with the Express, who clear the ring rather quickly. We settle down to Atlas in trouble as we get an insert promo from Fuji about how the Express will destroy anyone. Kato strikes away and Tanaka comes back in for a spinning forearm. A backbreaker/top rope ax handle combination finishes Atlas at 3:17.

Rating: C-. Total destruction here and it’s kind of interesting that Roma was in this spot just a few months before Power & Glory started up. The Express was a weird situation as they had all kinds of talent and could have a nice match with anyone (their stuff with the Rockers was great) but they never got above the midcard. It’s a shame as they could have been better, but they never got the chance.

Wrestlemania VII will (not) be at the Los Angeles Memorial Coliseum!

Warlord vs. Ricky Ataki

Warlord debuts Slick as his new manager and drops Ataki with a flying shoulder. A clothesline puts Ataki on the floor and there’s a suplex to drop him again. We get a quick Slick/Warlord inset interview with Slick being happy about his new acquisition. Warlord finishes with a running powerslam at 2:34. Nice squash.

We go to Madison Square Garden, seemingly on October 28, 1989.

Dino Bravo vs. Bret Hart

We’re joined in progress with Bret in trouble on the floor and having his already banged up chest knocked into the barricade. Back in and Bravo grabs the reverse chinlock before sending Bret right back to the floor. A sunset flip gives Bret two and but Bravo is right back with the bearhug.

They even drop to their knees for a bit in a weird spot before Bret bites his way to freedom. The bearhug goes right back on though and this time it’s a series of elbows to break it up. A suplex drops Bravo and Bret starts the comeback, including dropping an elbow for two. The backbreaker sets up the middle rope elbow but the time expires at 8:46 shown for the 20:00 draw (which was actually about 18:40).

Rating: C-. That wasn’t exactly great as it was mainly spent on the bearhug and Hart having to fight out of trouble. Then the ending came out of nowhere, which granted might have had something to do with showing about nine minutes of the match. These two fought quite a bit but I’m not sure I’ve ever seen them have a good one, so this wasn’t a surprise.

We go to the Brother Love Show, with the Bushwhackers as this week’s guests. Love laughs at them about Rhythm and Blues attacking them recently, sending Butch into a rant about how IT’S NOT FUNNY WHEN SOMEONE GETS HIT WITH A GUITAR. Butch threatens Love, who runs off to end a rather nothing segment, save for butch losing his mind.

Earthquake vs. Jim Gorman

Earthquake has Jimmy Hart with him and promises to hurt Hulk Hogan. The powerslam, a top rope chop to the head, and the Earthquake finishes Gorman at 1:37.

Post match Earthquake crushes him two more times and Gorman leaves on a stretcher.

House show ads.

Jim Duggan vs. Black Bart

Duggan works on the arm to start and sends him into the corner for a clothesline. The three point clothesline finishes Bart at 2:34. Duggan continues to be goofy fun and that would be the case forever.

Barbarian, with Bobby Heenan, says this is his year. Heenan says they’re coming for the good guys.

Jimmy Snuka says his mind is clean and he loves competition.

Gene thinks there are animals in Jim’s beard to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. There’s nothing much to the show but that’s kind of the point. This was about getting people on the show and mentioning some of the things they were doing. Granted in this case you had Wrestlemania fallout so there was quite a bit to cover from the biggest show of the year. I could go for some more like this, as it’s quick and easy while showcasing a lot of the talent of the era.

 

 

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Wrestling Challenge
Date: September 13, 1986
Location: Civic Center, Hartford, Connecticut
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Ernie Ladd, Johnny V

It’s the second episode and there is one simple question: how many times can Ernie Ladd use the terms “without a doubt” or “without a shadow of a doubt”? Last time was roughly 47 each in a show that didn’t even last an hour so he could get in his two statements dozens more time if he puts his mind to trying. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Quick host intro.

Opening sequence.

Here’s what’s coming this week.

Funks vs. George Steele/Junkyard Dog

Unfortunately it’s Jimmy Jack instead of Terry (with Jimmy Hart). Slightly more fortunately, Steele and Dog have Lou Albano with them. After Steele stops to eat a turnbuckle, Dog fires off some headbutts to clear out the Funks again. We actually start with Hoss (Dory) being rammed into the corner as Albano gives us an inset interview to talk about Steele and Dog working together well because they’re so different. He goes on so long that the inset window goes away mid sentence, which might be the best idea.

Steele gets taken into the corner as commentary bickers incessantly. It’s off to Dog for an awkward collision with Jimmy Jack in the corner and let’s try some hogtying! Steele makes the save with a chair and it’s a belly to back suplex to finish Jimmy Jack at 2:19. Somehow this was bad even in such a short amount of time.

Post match Jimmy Jack gets hogtied for fun. Then the winners, including Albano, dance as we get a referee (ignore the one count coming before Dog had the cover).

This week’s Wrestler’s Rebuttal is from the Hart Foundation, who don’t like being called nasty boys. They’ve been called Beer Belly and Greaseball but Bret says they’re the best there is, the best there was and the best there ever will be. Dang he got that one in earlier than I thought.

Kamala vs. Mario Mancini

Kamala (or Kamalee according to Lord Alfred Hayes) has Wizard and Kim Chee with him. After taking a good bit of time to get rid of his stuff, Kamala chops away on Mancini, even after he’s already down. The inset promo from the Wizard (identified as Curtis Iaukea by Monsoon) talks about getting a monster in Singapore as the squash continues. A kick to the ribs sets up more chops and the splash finishes Mancini at 1:59.

Captain Lou Albano talks about his psychologists/gynecologists (right) working with George Steele. Intelligence aside, he has the heart of a lion and knows every move. He may not use them, but he knows them you see. Steele grew up with a lisp but had a steel plate put over his tongue in a failed attempt to cure his speech impediment. Now he’s fighting….multiple sclerosis? Well that got serious quickly. Steele says he was told to be vicious, so he’ll do be vicious to Randy Savage.

Hillbilly Jim/Cousin Luke vs. Jack Kruger/Joe Mirto

The Hillbillies get jumped from behind to start but get cleared out without much trouble. Jim beats on Mirto as we hear from Jimmy Hart, who is sending his boys after the Hillbillies because he doesn’t like country music. Luke slams Mirto but misses an elbow, allowing Kruger to come in. Ladd says Luke’s tennis shoes are called “burglar boots” where he’s from as Luke fights up and brings Jim back in. A double slam sets up a bearhug to finish Kruger at 2:37. Hillbilly Jim was fun but adding in his relatives dragged the act down fast.

Interviewer Ken Resnick talks about how many great teams there are here and brings in the undefeated Rougeaus. They want to face every team to get their hands on the British Bulldogs for the Tag Team Titles. They inspire each other and while they respect the Bulldogs, they like the titles more. Both of them are a bit chatty but they were a fine team.

Honky Tonk Man is coming soon and talks about going out dancing last night with the 57 Chevy top down. He wants Paul Orndorff too. This gimmick as a face is an all time WHAT WERE THEY THINKING moment.

Ricky Steamboat vs. Roger Kirby

Steamboat leapfrogs him a few times to start but gets hiptossed for his efforts. The armdrags into an armbar put Kirby down and that works so well that Steamboat does it again. An atomic drop gets Kirby out of trouble and he kind of awkwardly kicks at Steamboat in what might have been a bit of miscommunication. Steamboat can’t chop out of the corner but he can ram Kirby into the buckle. Kirby is fine enough to knock him into the ropes though and Steamboat’s leg gets tied up. Back in and Steamboat slides between the legs, hits a slam, and finishes with the high crossbody at 4:23.

Rating: C-. This was a bit of a weird one as Steamboat was beaten up more than you would have expected him to be. That being said, I could watch Steamboat all day as there are very few people who can make wrestling look so smooth. That slide through the legs and high crossbody looked great and Steamboat is one of the only few who can pull that off.

We go to the Snake Pit with Hillbilly Jim as this week’s guest. Jake talks about putting together one of his mom’s recipes but Jim isn’t impressed. Instead, Jake tells him to stomp twice if he doesn’t understand him. Jim says he’ll stay quiet and let the fools talk. They trade witty expressions (Jake’s is about a bird and Jim says sometimes the lights are on but no one is home). This was a weird one even by Jake standards.

King Kong Bundy/Big John Studd vs. Billy Jack Hayes/Paul Roma

Hayes can’t get anywhere with Studd so we’ll go with an insert promo from Harley Race, who brags about being a king. Studd has to block some slam attempts and hands it off to Bundy for an elbow to the face. The splash misses in the corner though and Roma comes in to clean house. That must last for a full seven seconds before Bundy hits the Avalanche in the corner for the pin at 2:34.

Corporal Kirchner/Jim Powers/Salvatore Bellomo vs. Hercules/Iron Sheik/Nikolai Volkoff

Slick and Freddie Blassie are here with the villains. It’s a big brawl to start as the Americans break up the Russian national anthem (which earned some trash in the ring). We settle down to Sheik suplexing Bellomo and Hercules coming in to knee Powers in the ribs. As commentary suggests that Slick has an army of ladies of the evening in his employment, Sheik hits a running crotch attack to the back of the neck. We get an insert promo from Billy Graham, talking about his chimney being made of human skulls. With that out of the way, Hercules torture racks Powers for the win at 2:54.

Jimmy Hart and the Hart Foundation don’t like being called nasty boys. They’ve been accused of cheating and insist it is their skill/muscle that make them great. They’re coming for the British Bulldogs.

Here’s who’s coming next week.

Here is your musical review to wrap it up.

Overall Rating: C. They keep this show moving and that is a lot of fun every time. It is great to see the show have so much packed into about 45 minutes as opposed to one thing dominating the show. This was another easy to watch show and we’re inching closer to some of the biggest stuff the WWF will ever do, so it’s just getting started.

 

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Wrestlemania XVII
Date: April 1, 2001
Location: Astrodome, Houston, Texas
Attendance: 67,925
Commentators: Jim Ross, Paul Heyman

Do I even need to explain this one? It’s one of the all time legendary classics if not THE all time legendary classic and maybe the greatest show in wrestling history. I’ve seen this show more times than I can count thanks to a VHS that a buddy of mine made for me of the original broadcast. As for the card, it’s Austin vs. Rock II and that’s all you need to know. Let’s get to it.

Sunday Night Heat: Grandmaster Sexay/Steve Blackman vs. X-Pac/Justin Credible

It’s so strange to hear these theme songs at this show. It feels like something that belongs in a video game only. Believe it or not there’s actually a bit of a setup for this as Sexay recruited Blackman to team with him earlier today because those feet could be great for dancing. X-Pac and Credible are part of X-Factor, and have Albert (A-Train/Prince Albert/whatever else you want to call him) in their corner.

The good guys clean house to start and X-Pac misses a Bronco Buster in the corner. Albert gets in a clothesline from the apron so X-Pac can take over, including stealing the goggles. Some right hands don’t get Grandmaster very far as X-Pac kicks him in the face. A double clothesline works a bit better and the hot (?) tag brings in Blackman. Everything breaks down and Albert pulls Grandmaster to the floor, leaving Blackman to take a double superkick for the pin at 2:45. It’s nothing to see of course but this was a perfectly nice tag match that did its job just fine.

The opening video is still one of the strangest things I’ve ever seen, with a bunch of clips of people watching Wrestlemania over the years, including a man in a barn with a trumpet, a farm couple outside their house, a man carrying hay, an Asian man on the streets of what appears to be a city in China, two teenagers watching through a TV store window, a twenty something couple in the backseat of a car and a clown. This is interspersed with what appears to be some kind of nuns dancing in a field. The one thing I always wonder: how do you get pay per view on these portable TVs with no apparent cables coming into them?

The stadium looks incredible with the wide shots showing just how massive the whole thing is. There’s something so cool about those visuals where you can see the tens of thousands of people. It’s the first stadium show since….geez 1992?

Intercontinental Title: Chris Jericho vs. William Regal

Jericho, with a bad shoulder, is defending and has been tormenting Commissioner Regal for weeks due to Regal being an insufferable bore. This includes relieving himself in Regal’s teapot and dressing up like Doink for reasons that still aren’t clear (I’m sure Shawn Michaels is still mad about it too.). Regal responded by torturing Jericho with a series of handicap matches, setting up this showdown for revenge and the title. Notice that I can snap off those details without even seeing the highlight video while I could barely tell you how the main events of the last five Wrestlemanias were set up.

Jericho starts fast with a clothesline and spinwheel kick to send Regal outside as Heyman is in full on analysis mode. You can tell how excited he is to be here. Back in and a top rope back elbow gives Jericho two but Regal forearms his way out of the Walls attempt. Jericho’s bad shoulder goes into the post twice in a row and it’s time for some British limb punishment. An elbow to the face gives Jericho a breather but the Lionsault hits knees. The turnbuckle pad comes off and Regal sends the shoulder into the exposed steel so Jericho kicks him in the head.

A middle rope dropkick gets two but Regal goes right back to the shoulder. In something rather un-Regal, he takes Jericho up top for a butterfly superplex and another near fall. The Regal Stretch goes on until Jericho makes a rope. Right handed chops work a bit better for Jericho but a kick to the arm cuts him off again. The bulldog takes Regal down and the Lionsault out of nowhere retains the title at 7:08.

Rating: B-. This would have been a Kickoff match today so it’s a nice relief to have it actually get some attention rather than being background noise while the announcers previewed the more important stuff. These two beat the heck out of each other with Regal doing vile things to the shoulder. The ending came very suddenly but we got good stuff until we got there.

Shane McMahon arrives in the WCW-1 limo.

The APA and Jackie want to know where Tazz is, sending Bradshaw into an awesome speech about how important it is to be in the Astrodome because of all the sports traditions in the building and IT’S WRESTLEMANIA. I’ve always really liked this one.

APA/Tazz vs. Right to Censor

It’s Val Venis/Goodfather/Bull Buchanan for the RTC here and Tazz’s entrance cuts off Steven Richards’ rant. It’s a brawl to start with Jackie DDTing Richards until Tazz and Buchanan get things going. A big boot drops Tazz and it’s Venis coming in for two off a Russian legsweep. Goodfather gets a chance as well and whips Tazz into the ropes so hard that Tazz can’t even turn around in time.

The former Ho Train sets up a slow motion Vader Bomb with Tazz moving without much effort. It’s off to Bradshaw for a backdrop that barely gets Goodfather over and a better fall away slam to Venis. Everything breaks down and it’s the double spinebuster to Buchanan. A top rope belly to back superplex (with the cool looking ceiling making for an awesome visual) drops Venis, leaving Goodfather to miss the Ho Train so the Clothesline From Bradshaw can finish at 3:55.

Rating: D+. And that’s the worst match on the card. This could have been on Raw but it was a quick way to get the Texans on the card, which is hardly a bad idea. There was no reason for this to be any longer or any more evenly matches and for something like this, that’s all it needed to be. Sometimes you need a fun match instead of a long struggle and that’s what they had here.

Trish Stratus (currently Vince’s mistress) wheels in the catatonic Linda McMahon) but gets yelled at by Stephanie (in a much more compassionate way) for being late. Also, Trish needs to crack the ice for the champagne by hand.

Hardcore Title: Raven vs. Big Show vs. Kane

Raven, with a shopping cart full of toys, is defending so Heyman has some advice for him: “Run like h***.” Big Show comes out late so Raven this Kane with a plastic sign to no effect. Show (in his bad looking singlet phase) finally comes out so Kane throws Raven at him and comes off the top to the floor with the clothesline for two. They waste no time in fighting into the crowd and take their sweet time getting up to the stage (mainly because they’re in a freaking stadium) with Raven popping back up, only to be thrown partially through a wooden wall.

Show slams Kane onto a pile of wooden pallets and chases Raven into a caged storage area. The door is locked so Kane breaks it open and hits Show in the back with a broom. Raven chokes Kane with a garden hose but gets driven through the chain link wall. Kane isn’t finished and throws Raven through a glass window for a scary crash.

Not to be outdone, Show throws Kane through a regular door….so Kane shoves him through a wall. Raven pops in and grabs a golf cart, with Show jumping on the back for a crash (which according to Raven nearly knocked out the power to the entire building). Kane steals another golf cart and the referee hitches a ride, with Raven nearly being run over. This was supposed to start off some kind of a chase but for some reason it didn’t happen, probably time. Or Raven making the story up because he’s goofy like that.

They fight down the hallway and Raven goes through the drink table. That’s enough backstage as they head up some steps to the stage, with Kane winning a slugout with Show. A clothesline takes Kane down and Show gorilla presses Raven but they both get kicked off the stage and through part of the set. Kane drops an elbow/leg to pin Show for the title at 9:18.

Rating: C+. Completely different kind of match of course but I had a good time with it because they went with the full on goofy style instead of trying anything serious. The Hardcore Title was WAY past its usefulness at this point but at least they had some fun here. It didn’t need to be on the show, but would you rather watch another battle of the giants?

Kurt Angle obsessively watches footage of Chris Benoit making him tap out. Edge and Christian come in and say it’s going to be a big night for all three of them, though Angle only talks about how he didn’t officially tap.

Jimmy Snuka is at WWF New York. Cool enough.

An Australian fan is here. This was before the international feel really became a thing for Wrestlemania so this was a little different.

Rock arrives, forty minutes into the show. Are we really supposed to believe that people are just getting here after three matches? This has always bugged me for one reason or another.

European Title: Eddie Guerrero vs. Test

Eddie is challenging and has Perry Saturn, in a big fuzzy hat, with him. Test starts with a layout powerbomb for an early two and a gorilla press drop sends Eddie face first onto the top turnbuckle. Eddie catches him on top but a super hurricanrana attempt is easily blocked with a simple grab of the rope. A top rope back elbow to the jaw (must be a Canadian thing) rocks Eddie but Test misses a charge….and gets his boot caught in the rope like a goon.

Thankfully Eddie is smart enough to distract the referee so Saturn can get in some right hands so Test doesn’t look incredibly stupid. The leg gets undone (with Eddie’s help) and Eddie starts in on the knee as he should be doing. With Heyman getting in the still annoying lines of “they’re the same size on the mat”, Eddie grabs a sleeper but gets taken down with a tilt-a-whirl slam. A tilt-a-whirl powerbomb gets two but Eddie kicks him low, allowing Saturn to come in with the Moss Covered Three Handled Family Credenza.

JR: “HEY REF! THERE’S A THIRD MAN IN THE RING!” There has been a third man in the ring for the whole match Jim. Saturn was the fourth. Anyway, Eddie has to roll through the frog splash and gets caught with the pumphandle powerslam. That’s good for two after Test dispatches Saturn, followed by a big boot that so clearly misses Saturn that you can hear the fans’ non-reaction. Another big boot drops Eddie so Dean Malenko can run in for the save (seemed like he missed his spot, possibly because the aisle is so long). Test goes after him and it’s a belt shot to give Eddie the pin and the title at 8:03.

Rating: C-. Another match that could have been on Raw but was perfectly watchable for the most part. Eddie getting the title makes a lot more sense as Test wasn’t exactly a thrilling choice, though they took care of him a bit with all the interference that it took to get the title off of him. Not a good match or anything, but it’s not like it was anything atrocious.

Mick Foley promises to call the Vince vs. Shane street fight right down the line. Right here in Houston, Texas!

Austin arrives.

Ok so for those of you unfamiliar with this show, it might not have seemed great so far. The real show starts now.

Kurt Angle vs. Chris Benoit

This has kind of an infamous build as they’re fighting because neither of them had anything else to do, as mentioned on Raw. In other words, “go out there and do your awesome stuff”. Angle insults the fans on the way to the ring, insisting that he has NEVER tapped out to Benoit. Oh and adults wearing cowboy hats look stupid. Amen brother. Heyman: “This is as excited as a man can get with his clothes on.” Thankfully the match starts so I can get that image out of my head.

Angle takes him down to start but Benoit gets on top before rolling away for a standoff, much to the fans’ appreciation. They go to the mat again with Angle trying to get to the leg but rolling into the ropes instead. The threat of a Crossface sends Angle bailing to the floor as it’s an even match so far. Back in and Angle takes him down again but the Crossface sends him straight back to the rope.

That’s enough for Angle, who forearms Benoit in the face and it’s time for a fight on the floor. Makes sense and that’s a great way to make Benoit look awesome. A very hard whip sends Benoit into the steps and a suplex gets two back inside. Since he’s rather good at analysis, Heyman points out that Angle is now cool with a pin instead of a submission, which is a bit of a concession to Benoit.

Angle snaps off some overhead belly to belly suplexes but eats a clothesline as JR and Heyman argue over the best amateur wrestlers ever. A snap suplex gives Benoit two and a superplex gets a delayed version of the same. You know Benoit can’t just two suplexes so we hit the rolling German suplexes, only to have the third reversed into the ankle lock (BIG reaction for that). Benoit reverses that into an ankle lock of his own so Angle kicks him in the head.

Now the Crossface goes on but Angle rolls into his own Crossface. After a foot on the rope is good for the save, Benoit grabs his own Crossface to make Angle tap but there’s no one to see it. The Angle Slam gets two and Kurt can’t believe it. Angle’s moonsault hits knees so Benoit connects with the Swan Dive for two more. You can feel the energy from the crowd on these near falls. Back up and Angle gets in a low blow, setting up a rollup with tights to pin Benoit at 14:04.

Rating: B+. That would be the first show stealing classic of the night with a sweet story of Angle wanting to prove that he’s the better wrestler but resulting to cheating while still being able to brag about the win. That’s also the kind of ending that can keep a feud going, which I guess I can survive if I absolutely have to. Great match, yet somehow not even close to their best.

William Regal goes into his office and finds Kamala, rubbing a picture of Queen Elizabeth on his stomach. I think this speaks for itself.

Clip of the Wrestlemania pep rally in Fort Hood, with various wrestlers getting plaques (Lita looks completely miserable), though Angle would rather have a medal. There was a parade and the boss got a WWF chair.

Angle insists that he was the better man tonight. Benoit comes in to make him tap again.

We recap Chyna vs. Ivory. The Right to Censor wasn’t happy with Chyna posing for Playboy and tried to censor her, which included a spike piledriver to hurt Chyna’s neck. Chyna came back but got hurt again, only to come back again and come for the title here.

Women’s Title: Chyna vs. Ivory

Chyna is defending and fires off a pyro gun from the stage for a cool entrance. Ivory gets in a belt shot to knock Chyna down and rains down forearms but a kick to the ribs is blocked and that’s about it. The champ gets thrown across the ring like she’s nothing and Chyna unloads in the corner. Some hard clotheslines (JR: “I guess we could call that a Chyna Line. Or maybe not.”) and a powerbomb have Ivory out cold but Chyna pulls her up at two. A gorilla press drop finishes Ivory instead, giving Chyna the title at 2:38. That’s exactly what this should have been and nothing more. Chyna would leave the company before losing the title.

Trish ensures Vince that she has doubled up Linda’s medication and will only bring her down when Shane is at his most vulnerable. Michael Cole, still the annoying interviewer, comes in and asks about the shocking development of Shane buying WCW. Vince: “You want shocking? Tonight, you’ll get shocking.” That’s a guarantee.

We recap Vince vs. Shane and egads there’s a lot to this one. So Vince was having a public affair with Trish and said that he wanted to divorce Linda, who had a nervous breakdown as a result. Vince put her in an institution and had her heavily medicated, basically leaving her as a vegetable (make your own jokes). Shane came back to stand up for his mom but Vince had him beaten down, getting in a great line with “I will never ever forgive your mother for giving birth to you”.

A street fight was set up with former Commissioner Mick Foley (as fired by Vince) pulling out a contract that he signed before being fired saying that he could referee the match. Then Shane bought WCW on Monday, making this the first battle in what should have been a years long promotional war. Got all that?

Shane McMahon vs. Vince McMahon

Street fight as required with Mick Foley refereeing. Shane comes out first and introduces the WCW stars in the skybox (Lance Storm, Stacy Keibler, Shawn Stasiak and Chavo Guerrero are visual). Apparently they were scheduled to do a run-in during the match but Stasiak spoiled the plans in an interview so this is all you get of them. Stephanie in a Daddy’s Girl jumpsuit, is here with Vince.

A slap to Shane’s face gets us going, even though Foley didn’t call for the bell. Vince chokes in the corner but Shane nails a clothesline and something close to a spear. Some elbows to the back draw Stephanie in for the save, plus a slap to Shane. Shane is smart enough to baseball slide Vince and hammer away instead of going after her, plus nailing a few shots to the back with a KEEP OFF sign. A clothesline from the barricade has Vince in trouble and Stephanie begging him to get up.

Shane hits him in the back with a kendo stick and follows with the punches, which look a lot better when Shane isn’t middle aged. A monitor to Vince’s head knocks him silly and Shane loads up the elbow off the top. One great looking dive and a Stephanie pull later leaves Shane crashing in a good landing. That’s enough for Trish to wheel Linda down, just as Vince instructed. Trish helps Vince up and then slaps him in the face, triggering the catfight with Stephanie (with the fans eating this up with a spoon).

Foley tries to break it up (like a gentleman….I think) so Stephanie slaps him too. Trish chases Stephanie up the aisle, with Stephanie doing the most overblown fall I can remember, with her arms flying into the air before she starts going down. She can’t look natural no matter what she does. The two of them leave and we cut back to Vince getting up and calling Linda a b****. Foley breaks that up so Vince chairs him down and puts Linda in the ring, sitting her in a chair in the corner.

Vince isn’t done and throws Shane inside, followed by a bunch of garbage cans. Some can shots to the head have the still near dead Shane in even more trouble. Vince loads up another shot…..and Linda stands up. The place actually goes nuts and the fans are literally on their feet, which you almost never see in wrestling. Shane points behind Vince, who turns around and gets kicked low. Foley comes back in and unloads on Vince, setting up the debut of Coast to Coast to give Shane the pin at 14:23.

Rating: C+. I’ve seen this show literally 100 or so times and I still smile at Linda kicking Vince. This was about five stories all coming together in the soap opera story of the show. It works really, really well with Linda of all people getting a crazy reaction. When the McMahons are on their game, they’re some of the most entertaining people in wrestling and that was the case here. It’s nothing from a quality standpoint, but from a soap opera car crash perspective, this was a blast and incredibly fun.

Yesterday at Axxess (which is rather dark and looks like nothing you would see today), the Hardys talked about how their feud with the Dudleys and Edge and Christian has to end with TLC II because it’s the most dangerous match in wrestling.

Tag Team Titles: Dudley Boyz vs. Hardy Boyz vs. Edge and Christian

The Dudleys are defending and it’s TLC II. I would recap the story, but it’s more or less “let them go nuts”. The entrances take some time and it’s a rare instance where you just know this is going to be incredible. Both sets of Boyz waste no time in jumping the Canadians as the fight is on in a hurry. Edge and Christian are sent outside, leaving the Hardys to take over with a double Poetry in Motion.

Not wanting to waste time, Edge and Christian bring in a ladder to drop everyone. Just to make it a little personal, they also stand on Matt’s crotch in the corner. Jeff gets drop toeholded face first into an open chair but it’s way too early for Edge to climb the ladder. A clothesline takes Matt off the ladder (which falls as well), leaving Jeff to dropkick Edge down as well. The Hardys set up a pair of ladders and drop Christian, setting up a legdrop/splash combination off said ladders for the first high spot.

The Dudleys come back in for What’s Up on Edge and let’s get some tables. Bubba powerbombs Jeff through Edge through a table and it’s time to set up four tables (two on top of two) outside. There’s no way that’s going to end well. Back in and Bubba SMACKS Matt in the head with a ladder, drawing a well deserved gasp from the crowd.

Three ladders are set up and all six climb, with Christian and Matt falling to one side (Christian just vanishes over the top and down onto the floor in an underrated bump), Jeff and D-Von falling to the other (and hitting the ropes) and Bubba and Edge knocking each other off to fall backwards. With all six down and one ladder left, here’s Spike Dudley (returning from injury) for a Dudley Dog to Edge off said ladder. Another one off the apron sends Christian through a table at ringside but here’s Rhyno (also taken out recently) to stop Jeff from going up.

Back to back Gores put Bubba and Matt down and Rhyno points Edge up a ladder. Now it’s Lita (Gored by Rhyno last week) coming in and “jerking Edge off” according to JR to bring him down from a ladder. There’s a hurricanrana to Rhyno and Spike chairs him into a ladder to knock Edge off. A Doomsday Device hits Rhyno and Lita cracks Spike in the head with a chair. Lita takes her top off but walks into the 3D, leaving Edge and Christian to chair the Dudleys down.

Edge sends Christian outside to get the big ladder, but you can’t have one of those with Jeff around. Jeff takes out Christian and climbs up the ladder (which is standing on the floor and equally as tall as the ones in the ring) for a huge Swanton onto Spike and Rhyno through a pair of tables. Well actually entirely through Spike as Rhyno was just grazed and his table didn’t even break. Edge brings the big ladder in and sets it up in front of three regular sized ladders.

Christian and D-Von go up the big one but Matt (“HERE WE GO!”) moves it from underneath them, leaving them hanging from the ring. They both fall so Jeff climbs up onto the regular ladders and tries to walk a tightrope to get to the titles but one of the ladders comes down. Instead he climbs a regular ladder and grabs the belt but Bubba takes the ladder away, leaving Edge to climb the big ladder for the highlight reel spear that made him look like even more of a star than he already did.

Two things about that spot: first of all, Jeff’s feet were caught in the ladder that Bubba moved so he swung forward into the spear to make it look even better. Second: a fan asked Edge if he was scared doing that in rehearsal. Edge: “YOU THINK WE DID THAT MORE THAN ONCE???”

As soon as we’re done with the replay, Rhyno shoves Bubba and Matt off the big ladder and through the four tables at ringside for the amazing crash. D-Von and Christian go up this time but Edge grabs D-Von and Rhyno gives Christian a boost to pull down the titles at 15:42. Edge and Christian clutching the titles and looking shell shocked is a great bonus.

Rating: A+. This was magnificent and it really does amaze me how structured they make this feel. They built things up over the course of this match with the fighting to start and then a few big spots, followed by the interference and then the sequence of show stealing spots (Jeff’s Swanton, the spear and the huge crash) to wrap it up. They managed to tell a story with what should just be a car crash match and that’s one of the most impressive things about this whole series. This is incredible and the best team ladder match ever, bar absolutely none.

Video on Axxess. This video was a big reason that I wanted to go to Wrestlemania, though this version looks WAY more fun than what you actually get, mainly due to the crazy long lines.

Heyman applauds TLC II. As he should.

Howard Finkel announces the new attendance record of 67,925.

Gimmick Battle Royal

Luke, Butch, Duke Droese, Iron Sheik, Earthquake, The Goon, Doink the Clown, Kamala, Kim Chee, Repo Man, Jim Cornette, Nikolai Volkoff, Michael Hayes, One Man Gang, Tugboat, Hillbilly Jim, Brother Love, Sgt. Slaughter

Gene Okerlund and Bobby Heenan are out for commentary, which is suddenly a lot sadder. If nothing else, it’s so satisfying to hear Heenan’s healthy voice before the cancer took away its greatness. This is one of the first nostalgia matches the company did n this kind of a stage and my goodness it still feels amazing. It also comes at the right time on the show as they needed to take a little breather after what we just saw.

Doink gets a nice reaction while Hillbilly Jim (who looks like he hasn’t aged a day) gets a VERY nice reaction, mainly because it’s such a fun gimmick. Hayes gets a big reaction, both from the fans and Heenan. Gang was supposed to be Akeem but couldn’t fit in the costume. Gene sounds like he has a nightmare about the Gooker, and yes we get the video of his debut. Repo Man is thrown out almost immediately and the Gooker is out second. Heenan: “This looks like a riot at Let’s Make A Deal!”

Tugboat is tossed as well and Kamala tosses Earthquake, who Gene almost calls by his real name. Kamala eliminates Kim Chee (what loyalty) and Luke is out next. Cornette is out (he and Love had agreed to stay in the corner and lightly hit each other but kept messing up and wound up injuring each other in mistakes straight out of the Three Stooges) and Droese follows him as you might be able to tell that this isn’t about the actual wrestling.

Goon and Volkoff go out next and Doink eliminates Butch. Kamala tosses Doink (and gets booed out of the building), with Hayes, Gang and Kamala going out as well. We’re down to Love, Sheik, Hillbilly and Slaughter but before I can even write those names, Sheik dumps Hillbilly to win at 3:05, mainly because he was too frail to be tossed out.

Rating: A. Consider the reason for the match and you’ll get why the rating makes sense. The match itself lasted just over three minutes while the entrances took 10:28. The entire point of this was to let these guys have one last entrance on the big stage and give the fans a nostalgia trip, which worked perfectly well. I had a good time here and it’s great way to let things lighten up a bit before we get to the last two matches.

Post match Slaughter comes in and gives Sheik the Cobra Clutch to stand tall one more time.

We recap Undertaker vs. HHH. After beating Austin two straight falls at No Way Out, HHH said he had beaten everyone there was to beat. Undertaker came out and said HHH had never beaten him. HHH jumped Undertaker and choked him with a chair (HHH: “You’re the guy that makes people famous. I’m already famous. I’m famous for crippling people.”) so Undertaker beat up his limo with a pipe.

HHH came back with a restraining order keeping Undertaker from Stephanie, so Undertaker had Kane kidnap Stephanie and threaten to throw her off a balcony until the match was made. Not yet done, HHH even destroyed Undertaker’s motorcycle with a sledgehammer. You can feel the hatred here and that’s the kind of video where WWE excels.

HHH vs. Undertaker

Motorhead plays HHH to the ring in one of the all time great entrances, especially with a wide shot of the entrance and a shadowed HHH stepping out and posing to show just how grand the stage really is. Undertaker rides the motorcycle down the long ramp with more speed than you’ll ever see on a wrestling show for a nowhere near as cool (yet still cool) visual. Oh and as a Network bonus: Rollin is still used as the theme rather than the bizarre times where they dub in the Ministry theme.

The fight is on in a hurry on the floor and HHH is knocked through the makeshift Spanish announcers’ table. They get in for the opening bell, with JR mentioning Undertaker being 8-0 at Wrestlemania. The fact that we weren’t even halfway to the first loss is really incredible and makes the already other worldly Streak all the more impressive. A big backdrop has HHH in trouble and a running clothesline in the corner rocks him again. There’s a running powerslam (which I don’t ever remember Undertaker using otherwise) but an elbow misses.

Old School (Is it Old School all the way back in 2001?) is broken up with a pull off the top, which is fair enough as Undertaker was just standing there. HHH elbows him in the back of the head and gets in another to the chest, setting up a neckbreaker for three straight two’s. The yelling at the referee lets Undertaker fire off the punches to the ribs but walks into the facebuster. The sledgehammer is brought in but the referee takes it away. Undertaker has to counter the Pedigree and the referee gets bumped in the corner.

A chokeslam gives HHH two and he’s not happy with the slow count, meaning it’s a beatdown on the referee. Well a kick and elbow drop to the back but for a referee that’s a heck of a beating. Undertaker throws HHH over the corner and takes it outside with HHH being backdropped over the barricade. They fight up to the technical area with Undertaker hammering away and tossing HHH up to a higher level.

HHH finds a chair though and destroys Undertaker with about nine shots about the head and knee. Too much posing takes too much time though and Undertaker is back up with a chokeslam off the tower for an awesome visual (I miss flashbulbs in wrestling). Undertaker isn’t done though as he climbs onto the barricade and drops a very big elbow onto HHH (revealing that he landed on a crash pad, taking away a lot of the impressiveness).

The medics get beaten up and they head back to the ring, where the referee is still down, about seven minutes after he was kicked and elbowed. Back in the ring and Undertaker grabs the sledgehammer but gets low blowed to save HHH’s life. Undertaker kicks the hammer out of HHH’s hands and the slugout is on. HHH tries a Tombstone but gets reversed into the real thing for no count, because the referee hasn’t moved in TEN MINUTES.

Undertaker finally goes over and shakes him before calling for the Last Ride. It’s not well placed though as HHH grabs the hammer and nails Undertaker in the head to counter….for two, in a great near fall (these two are great at those). Undertaker is busted open so HHH hammers away in the corner and it’s the Last Ride (I believe the debut of that counter so it’s not even a cliché yet) for the pin at 18:19.

Rating: A. Sweet goodness I love this match as they beat the heck out of each other because they wanted revenge. That’s how you do a match like this and there was nothing overly cowardly from HHH for a change. They were testing each other throughout the match and that made for a heck of a fight, which is all you could ask for. Well that and some better medical care for the referee. This one holds up very, very well and I like it better than their second Wrestlemania match at XXVII. Check this one out if you haven’t seen it in a long time, or even if you have because it’s that good.

And in case we haven’t had enough greatness on this show, there’s this left.

We recap Steve Austin vs. the Rock with the legendary My Way video. Austin was out for about a year with neck surgery and Rock became the biggest star in the world in his absence. Austin is back and won the Royal Rumble, with Rock winning the WWF Title the next month to set up the showdown of showdowns.

This turned into a game of oneupsmanship with the two of them using their own moves against each other and beating the heck out of each other over and over. You knew this was going to be special because the energy was right there in front of your eyes. The final exchange is perfect too. Rock: “You are going to get the absolute best of the Rock at Wrestlemania.” Austin: “I need to beat you Rock. I need it more than anything that you can ever imagine. There can be only one World Wrestling Federation Champion, and that will be Rock, Stone Cold Steve Austin.” Do you need anything else?

Well you certainly didn’t need the ridiculous Debra involvement (Austin’s wife, who Vince had managing the Rock), which thankfully isn’t brought up or referenced in any significant way outside of the video because it was a bad idea that didn’t help anything. It would have dragged things down, and thankfully it’s just not here.

WWF World Title: Steve Austin vs. The Rock

Austin is challenging and it’s No DQ, announced just before the entrances. Austin’s entrance still gives me chills as it’s one of the best of all time as he’s reached a level of popularity in Texas (or anywhere for that matter) that is unmatched anywhere. Throw in JR’s incredible commentary (as only he could do) and a camera shot of Austin walking up to the second rope for the pose with all the flashbulbs going off and the camera zooming out to show all the people) and it’s hard to ever top. Rock….isn’t that popular here, but you had to know that was coming.

Austin’s “are you kidding me” look up at Rock as he poses is great and the fight is on as soon as Rock comes down. An early belt shot misses Rock so it’s the Thesz press and middle finger elbow as they start fast. Rock grabs a swinging neckbreaker but it’s too early for the Rock Bottom. The Stunner can’t hit for either of them so Austin throws him over the top rope as we’re not even a minute in yet. They head into the crowd with Rock getting the better of it and bringing it back to ringside. A clothesline takes Rock down but Austin has to adjust his knee brace.

The running crotch attack to the back gets two and a superplex keeps Rock in trouble. The turnbuckle pad is taken off but Rock nails a clothesline and they fight outside again. Austin gets sent into the ring bell but comes right back up with a bell shot for a knockdown. The bloody Rock is sent through the announcers’ table (a running theme tonight) and it’s back inside for more right hands. Rock’s comeback is booed so Austin gets in his own swinging neckbreaker to get the fans back, plus a two count as a bonus.

Stomping and choking in the corner has Rock in even more trouble but Austin stops to yell at the referee, allowing Rock to charge out of the corner with the hard clothesline. There’s a middle finger to Austin and he goes face first into the buckle. Instead of covering, Rock brings in the bell and clocks Austin (more booing) to bust him open for two. Right hands knock Austin outside but he drops Rock onto the barricade.

The catapult sends Rock into the post for that always awesome bump where he spins sideways. A monitor to the head gives Austin two but the Stunner is countered into the Sharpshooter for a Wrestlemania XIII callback. The hold is finally broken, though Austin comes up holding his knee. A rake to the eyes gets Austin out of a second attempt and he slaps on a Sharpshooter of his own.

Rock powers out as well so Austin puts it on again (makes sense) but a rope is grabbed. It’s not clear why Austin lets go, or why the referee makes him let go, but that’s been a problem for years. With nothing else working, Austin slaps on the Million Dollar Dream. Rock climbs the rope and flips back into a cradle for two, forcing the break in a callback to Survivor Series 1996. Rock’s Stunner drops Austin for a very delayed near fall…and here’s Vince McMahon.

Austin’s whip spinebuster gives him two more and frustration sets in even deeper. Rock gets a spinebuster of his own and there’s the People’s Elbow but Vince breaks up the cover. Shockingly enough Rock isn’t happy and chases the rather spry Vince, right into a Rock Bottom from Austin for two more. The ref gets bumped (not sure why it’s necessary in a No DQ match) and Austin hits Rock low. Austin tells Vince to bring in a chair and the boss gets in a shot to Rock’s head, with Vince throwing the referee in for the two count.

A quick Rock Bottom gets Rock a breather but he has to drag Vince inside instead of covering. Another Stunner gets another two so Vince hands him a chair for a heck of a shot to the head. That’s another two and the fans are cheering for the kickouts. Austin has had it and DESTROYS Rock with an insane sixteen straight chair shots for the pin and the title at 28:06 to a monster pop.

Post match Vince and Austin shake hands, officially ending the Attitude Era. Of note: Vince told Austin before the match that if he wasn’t feeling it, he could Stun Vince and they would figure it out the next day. That’s some incredible control to give a wrestler but Austin didn’t go with it. He did however say this was a bad idea in retrospect. Austin and Vince share a beer over Rock’s body and it’s one more belt shot to Rock to wrap things up as JR wants answers.

The long highlight package ends the show with My Way playing us out. Oh and one more thing. The song talks about how someone wants one more fight and then he’ll do things someone’s way. So, after three years, Vince could say to Austin that’s finally doing things…..“my way.” If that’s what they were going for, I need to buy a hat and take it off for them because that’s outstanding.

Overall Rating: A+. As Bradshaw said in his speech: “It’s Wrestlemania.” Throw in a XVII and you really don’t need to say much else about this show. There’s a reason it’s so revered, with the incredible combination of TLC II and Austin Rock II, somehow leaving instant classics like Benoit vs. Angle and Undertaker HHH as distant thirds and fourths. It’s pretty easily the best show ever with the energy off the charts, a can’t miss cards and the historic ending. I mean…it’s X7. I think that sums it up as well as anything else I can say so stop reading this and go watch it again.

Ratings Comparison

Chris Jericho vs. William Regal

Original: B

2013 Redo: B-

2015 Redo: B-

2019 Redo: B-

Right to Censor vs. Tazz/A.P.A.

Original: C-

2013 Redo: C-

2015 Redo: D+

2019 Redo: D+

Raven vs. Kane vs. Big Show

Original: C+

2013 Redo: C+

2015 Redo: C+

2019 Redo: C+

Eddie Guerrero vs. Test

Original: C-

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo: D+

2019 Redo: C-

Kurt Angle vs. Chris Benoit

Original: B+

2013 Redo: B+

2015 Redo: A-

2019 Redo: B+

Chyna vs. Ivory

Original: N/A

2013 Redo: N/A

2015 Redo: N/A

2019 Redo: N/A

Vince McMahon vs. Shane McMahon

Original: B

2013 Redo: B

2015 Redo: C+

2019 Redo: C+

Edge and Christian vs. Hardy Boyz vs. Dudley Boyz

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A+

2015 Redo: A+

2019 Redo: A+

Gimmick Battle Royal

Original: N/A

2013 Redo: N/A

2015 Redo: A

2019 Redo: A

Undertaker vs. HHH

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A

2015 Redo: A

2019 Redo: A

Steve Austin vs. The Rock

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A+

2015 Redo: A+

2019 Redo: A+

Overall Rating

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A++

2015 Redo: A+

2019 Redo: A+

I think I’m done with this one as the ratings are barely changing every time.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/24/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-17-oh-yes/

And the 2013 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/03/26/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-xvii-the-greatest-show-of-all-time/

And the 2015 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/03/23/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-xvii-2015-redo-see-the-previous-comment/

 

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