Impact – March 24, 2011 – #1 Contender Match….Again

Impact
Date: March 24, 2011
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz
Episode Title: Do the Math

It’s another week in the Impact Zone after last week’s pretty awful show.  For some reason I have a better feeling about this show tonight.  I hope we don’t have another #1 contenders match tonight as there seems to be one on every show.  Other than that we continue on the Road to Lockdown.  Let’s get to it.

We open with clips of Anderson wanting a title shot last week and the segments with Hogan.  Oh and they swear a lot.  This has various editing in it so they have the same thing said multiple times and with different voice effects.

In the arena it’s Anderson and some guy in a suit.  There’s what appears to be a dry erase board in the ring.  Into the ring and there’s a bunch of math and formulas on the board.  This guy is apparently a professor from the University of Wisconsin-Green Bay and is a mathematician.  He talks about how Hogan and Bischoff are trying to mess this up for him.  Last week there was a double pin last week which he draws on the board.

Anderson never got a rematch and when you add up everything, WHERE IS HIS FREAKING REMATCH???  The professor says he does deserve a rematch and that’s it from him.  Oh wait Anderson wants to talk about some chick he wants to sleep with back in college.  Anderson implies the professor wanted to sleep with her too which the professor admits to.

The girl told Anderson that the professor told her that Anderson was gay.  The professor admits to it and Anderson says that’s cool.  Say it with me: Mic Check to the professor.  Nothing for Mary Ann?  Cue Hogan and Bischoff.  The professor is out cold under the board.  Bischoff doesn’t see what Hogan sees in Anderson and that the Network won’t like this.  Eric says that this is all Hogan’s deal.

Hogan likes what Anderson did to the professor, saying that he thought it was entertaining.  Anderson has been running amuck recently and Hogan doesn’t like it.  Hogan doesn’t like the idea of Anderson not doing things his way, the Immortal way.  There won’t be a rematch unless Anderson earns it.  The rematch contract doesn’t count because it’s signed by Dixie.  That does cover why his win in the triple threat back in February is worthless so points for that.  It’s RVD vs. Anderson tonight for the shot at Sting.  Anderson says RVD isn’t in his league.

Cue RVD as we take a break.  Back with RVD saying say what you were saying right now to Anderson.  Anderson says he’ll say it in the ring and calls Hogan a douchebag.  Hogan likes that and talks about playing in a sandbox with a perverted professor.  RVD isn’t sure why he signed with TNA in the first place.  He’s tired of being held back by Hogan and Bischoff and this needs to be RVDTV.

Sweet goodness it’s Sting now as I guess 20 minutes of talking isn’t enough to open a show.  I wasn’t huge on Sting’s new look at first but it’s growing on me.  He got a call from the Network also and they want Sting to be the enforcer in the main event tonight.  Dang the Network called him fast.  Granted they might have known about the match in advance I guess.

We get an update on AJ who has a bruiser spinal cord and he’ll be out indefinitely.

Tara vs. Mickie next.

Mickie James vs. Tara

 

What in the world happened to the Knockouts division?  This should be a great match but it’s been done into the ground.  Madison tells Tara to take Mickie down tonight no matter what it takes.  Naturally there’s a Charlie Sheen reference because everyone loves him still right?  We do get the Broken song though so I’m happy there.  Mickie dominates to start us off with a Thesz Press and a flapjack.
Tara is more or less in a bikini with a slightly longer top.  Can’t say I’m complaining.  Tara counters a rana attempt by Mickie into a powerbomb.  Tara goes up and gets crotched but fights Mickie off.  In a rather awesome looking move Tara does something that is kind of similar to a Styles Clash but instead of the ending to the Clash she landed in a Boston Crab position.  That was pretty cool looking.  Didn’t get the submission but the setup was cool.  Widow’s Peak attempt doesn’t work and a HUGE jumping DDT ends Tara at 3:20.

Rating: C+. These two fight a lot and I think I can see why.  First of all they’re both gorgeous and second of all they have good matches.  That DDT was awesome looking and is far better than whatever she uses usually.  I know she’s used it before but that was the first time I’ve seen it in awhile.  Good match here despite it being pretty short.

Anderson and Sting argue a bit in the back and Anderson wants to know a name at the Network.  There’s no name apparently and it’s just The Network.  That makes no sense so it’s probably a very important plot point for a major storyline.

We recap the borderline sexual assault on Okato last week by Pope.

Joe talks to Okato who has a match tonight.  Okato says something in Japanese.

Okato vs. D’Angelo Dinero

 

The announcer calls him Okada while the screen says Okato.  Okato jumps him immediately and is wrestling in that Jimmy Jack Funk mask.  After a quick attack to start he misses a dropkick off the top and here comes Pope.  The ropes are making loud noises whenever they’re hit tonight.  Pope vs. Joe at Lockdown.

Pope rams a bunch of knees into Okato’s head as he’s hanging over the apron.  He takes the boot off and drills Okato in the head with it, then takes the glove off to reveal a bunch of rings.  An uppercut with that is enough for a DQ at 2:28.  Barely even a match here as other than about 8 seconds at the beginning it was all Pope.  Pope pops the referee also and beats up Okato a bit more until Joe makes the save.  BIG reaction for Joe.

Video on Sting that we’ve seen like three times now which is about how he got into wrestling and loves TNA now.  TNA needed a hero so he came back.  Lots of Hardy mentions in this video which I’m not sure what to think of.

Now we get a video on Angle vs. Jarrett.  Is there a reason why we’re seeing a promo video for Lockdown in the middle of a show?  They’re good videos but I’m a bit confused as to why they’re airing here.

All show we’ve heard about Flair issuing a challenge to Fourtune.  That’s up next.

Back with RVD talking to Hogan.  Hogan thinks RVD is the guy and that he doesn’t get what Bischoff sees in Anderson.  He wants RVD to give it his all tonight and Van Dam leaves.  Hogan laughs and says what an idiot.

Here are Flair, Ray and Matt Hardy.  Flair talks about being God and how he’s going to hand the mic off to two great tag team wrestlers who are the best thing going today.  Wow indeed.  Matt looks so high it’s unreal.  He talks about being told they were the future 10 years ago but being stabbed in the back.  They’re going to stab Fourtune in the back but doing it straight ahead.

Bubba takes the mic and the fans chant for D-Von.  He talks about AJ not being here and how it’s because of Ray.  Apparently his Uncle Vito taught him to make people an offer they can’t refuse.  Ray asks for a 4-3 match at Lockdown.  Aren’t there only three of each?  Cue Fourtune minus AJ of course.

Kaz leads the charge and the fight is on.  Why are Flair’s clothes always ripped off in fights?  DWI attempt on Flair but the lights go red.  And Abyss is back and is the 4th man.  There’s a chain brought in from somewhere and the big beating is on.  We take a break with Immortal standing tall.

Back with Abyss saying he’s stronger now and all that jazz.  He’s a monster don’t you know.

Here are Hernandez and his Mexican team, in this case the guy that ran in last week and Sarita/Rosita.  The guy is named El Anarchia.  The stable is called Mexican America apparently.  They’re taking our jobs, our women and our money because they’re the superior race.  Hernandez puts a Mexican flag over the American flag.  That flag is huge.  They call out Morgan who comes out with….he comes out with D-Von.

D-Von/Matt Morgan vs. Hernandez/Anarchia

This is a street fight.  There’s the massive Mexican flag above the ring and a British flag in the stands.  Holy international show!  Moregan and Hernandez in the ring with a fallaway slam taking Hernandez down.  The elbows in the corner set up a clothesline to send Supermex to the floor.  Velvet Sky runs down because this isn’t making enough sense already and she fights with the girls.

Angelina Love (blast that Jersey Shore chick so I now have to explain things) walks out very slowly but doesn’t do anything.  Winter comes out and screams ANGELINA.  Isn’t there like a MATCH going on right now?  Angelina leaves and we go back to the mach.  Anarchia hits D-Von with some object to end this at 3:40.  I know that’s long enough to grade but considering we saw maybe 90 seconds of the actual match and the rest was on the girls, no rating.

Scott Steiner/Crimson vs. Ink Inc

 

Glad to see Crimson actually getting some camera time.  Neal looks like he’s in boxers.  Total squash to start with Neal getting destroyed by both guys.  Moore comes in and gets beaten down also.  He gets the first offense of the match for his team in the form of a moonsault press.  Shannon goes to tag Jesse but Jesse is still hurt.  Instead he jumps into the Red Alert to end it 3:05.

Rating: D+. Just a squash here as I guess they’re splitting up Ink Inc now too.  Other than Beer Money who in the world is left for this division?  Unless we’re going to go back to the Guns vs. Beer Money again, I have no idea where else they’re going with it.  Total squash here with Ink Inc getting in a combined 2 moves.

Neal shows respect post match but Moore takes the head gear of Steiner and wipes himself with it and throws it at Steiner.  Neal yells at him for it.

Video of the Anderson vs. RVD match at Victory Road.

Rob Van Dam vs. Mr. Anderson

 

This match is happening because Earl Hebner never got to declare a winner.  So, in the last week, no one like, asked him who won?  Basic stuff to start us off as Anderson gets a neckbreaker for two.  Sting is the outside referee so they might as well stamp “Screwy finish” on this right now.  Backbreaker gets two.  Totally going through the motions here until we get to the ref bump.

And there it is as Anderson clotheslines the referee.  Chinlock by Anderson as Sting comes in as referee now.  Split legged moonsault gets two for RVD.  Rolling Thunder is avoided so RVD dives to the floor to take out Anderson.  Anderson fires a chair into the ring and Sting throws it out.  Mic Check into the post and RVD is done.  Anderson drills Sting and it’s a DQ at 6:43.  Ok, so RVD is #1 contender!  There is no way that there could be any other logical conclusion.

Rating: C-. The whole going through the motions thing got really annoying as they made it very clear that something was coming.  The ending just had to be screwy because that’s what they’re doing here to set up Lockdown, but now they’ve picked RVD.  Ok, that’s what I was hoping.  Just a winner.  I feel all at peace now.  I’m sure TNA will never find a way to change this.  Not them.  Not even a little bit.

Big pull apart brawl post match and we take a break.

Back with interviews with everyone involved in the match.  RVD doesn’t remember the match and thinks he has a title match tonight with Sting out of all this.  The interviewer corrects him and RVD is gone after the Mic Check into the post.  So another head injury angle?  Original guys, original.

Anderson wants to know why Sting is afraid of him.

Sting says he didn’t ring the bell.  Oh dear.  Oh dear indeed.  Anderson goes after Sting and they brawl again.  After they’re pulled apart Anderson wants to know who rang the bell.

Overall Rating: C. Far better than last week but I’m not sure what that’s really saying.  The ending likely is going to get changed because they’re dead set on that triple threat ending.  The pacing this week was WAY better with the wrestling being more spaced out.  Still not a great show really but it’s far better than last week.  I didn’t get annoyed during this one as I usually do, which is a good sign.  Much better show here.

Results

Mickie James b. Tara – Jumping DDT

Okato b. D’Angelo Dinero via DQ when Dinero hit Okato with rings on his hand

Hernandez/Anarchia b. D-Von/Matt Morgan – Anarchia pinned D-Von after hitting him with brass knuckles

Scott Steiner/Crimson b. Ink Inc – Red Alert to Moore

Rob Van Dam b. Mr. Anderson via DQ when Anderson hit the referee




History of Wrestlemania with KB – Wrestlemania 8: Hogan? Who Needs The Bald Man?

Wrestlemania 8
Date: April 5, 1992
Location: Hoosierdome, Indianapolis, Indiana
Attendance: 62,167
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

Star Spangled Banner: Reba McEntireThis was an interesting entry in the series as well. You could clearly see things beginning to change in the WWF at this point. Ric Flair had arrived and was the reigning WWF Champion, Hulk Hogan was talking about retirement, Bret Hart and Shawn Michaels were singles wrestlers, and a lot of the goofiness was gone. This show was billed as possibly Hogan’s farewell match which was a really strange thing to hear no matter who you were.

Hogan had been the face of the company for nearly ten years and the possibility of him leaving was a scary though. This show also was different in that it cut down the number of matches from 12-14 to 9, which cut out a lot of the mindless filler and gave more important matches more time. It was held under a dome, just like WM 3 and had a very large crowd.The WWF Title wasn’t on the line in the last match of the show but rather in the middle, which was another rarity. Anyway, on with the show! A running joke of the show is that Elizabeth allegedly dated Ric and posed for special photographs for him which Flair promised to show. To the best of my knowledge, nothing ever came of this.

We open with Reba McEntire singing the National Anthem which is a nice thing to hear again. She is eventually helped out of the ring by Tito “El Matador” Santana.

Tito Santana vs. Shawn Michaels

Shawn is finally full heel after the legendary barber shop window incident. You can tell Heenan is rolling tonight as he gets in a great line almost immediately by saying he things Tito and Reba are siblings. “Sure. That’s Arriba McEntire.” I love listening to Heenan when he’s on his game and he certainly is here. We get the old school orgasm sounding music with Sherri “singing.”Shawn has challenged the winner of the IC Title match apparently. We waste some time as Sherri de-jackets Shawn. They imply there are some heel shenanigans coming. We get started and naturally it’s fast paced. A headlock keeps Tito in control and we have a special 900 number. There is some demon child shouting in an EVIL voice at Shawn and it’s kind of creepy.

Back in and Tito is dominating for the most part. We get a LONG headlock by Tito but they somehow keep it entertaining. That’s the difference between talented guys and generic guys: talented guys keep things moving even during things like these. They’re trying to get rollups and fight out of the hold and move around. They make it a contest which gives the fans something to keep their interest. That’s very important and separates the greats from the regulars.

Tito gets knocked over the top and is all dizzy headed. Where’s Jesse to say it’s because of a bad taco? Now Shawn hits the chinlock and has Tito in trouble. Tito gets up and walks into what would evolve into Sweet Chin Music. I guess here it’s Sour Jaw Humming? The Tear Drop Suplex, Shawn’s finisher, is blocked and the forearm connects to send Shawn to the floor.

Tito beats the tar out of him on the floor and gets a slingshot forearm/shoulder to have Shawn in real trouble. Shawn’s bumping like a madman because it’s Wrestlemania. The forearm hits and Shawn goes outside again. And then we get what has to be a botched ending as Tito goes to suplex him back in but Shawn falls on him for the pin. I guess Sherri was supposed to cheat but they messed it up somehow. That’s all I can come up with for that ending.

Rating: B-. Rather solid stuff here with both guys knowing exactly what to do out there. The scary thing is that Shawn would get about ten times better in about two or three years. This was fine for an opener and it worked well for what it was supposed to do. Good stuff from two good workers.

The Legion of Doom are tired of being off center. They bring back Paul Ellering. Who’s Paul Ellering you ask? That’s the same question most of the people have. What they fail to mention is Ellering was their manager during their hottest period in the NWA. Without knowing that, this interview makes little sense.

The Legion of Doom are tired of being off center. They bring back Paul Ellering. Who’s Paul Ellering you ask? That’s the same question most of the people have. What they fail to mention is Ellering was their manager during their hottest period in the NWA. Without knowing that, this interview makes little sense.

Jake Roberts isn’t afraid of the Undertaker. This feud goes back a long way actually. Roberts and Taker had both been heels and had crashed Savage’s and Liz’s wedding. Jake and Savage had a match, after which Jake was waiting backstage to hit Liz with a chair. Taker stopped this, turning face in the process.

Jake had been a guest on Taker’s show, The Funeral Parlor. He had locked Taker’s hand in a casket and DDTed Paul Bearer before attacking Taker with a chair. This did absolutely nothing though. Taker says Jake needs to be ready to meet his maker. It’s Jake’s last match as he would go to WCW and fight Sting for awhile in a totally forgotten feud.

Undertaker vs. Jake Roberts

Talk about a contrast between the previous match and this one. This likely isn’t going to be anything special at all to put it mildly. Bobby suggests Jake has a chance here. That’s so cute. We hit the floor almost immediately with Taker dominating. He’s the face here if I didn’t mention that.

Pure dominance here as we get Munsters and Addams Family references from Heenan, who feels like he has two brilliant minds on occasion. This match is meandering pretty badly here. DDT out of NOWHERE and the crowd is stunned. Could the Streak be over at one??? Taker sits up before Jake gets to his feet which is unthinkable.

Short arm clothesline and Taker is up again. Jake PLANTS him with another DDT and goes after Paul. Taker sits up again. If those had been KB DDTs he would have stayed down. Taker goes after Jake and a Tombstone on the floor ends Jake’s WWF run in emphatic style. The pin is of course academic.

Rating: D+. Nothing that great here but I’ve seen worse. They were still going for ways to make Taker look awesome as they had no idea what to do with him. They knew he was something special and he’s a former WWF Champion but at the same time, what do you do with him? It was a problem they had until a guy named Mankind showed up.

Brutus Beefcake is here for some reason.

We see a double interview with IC Champion Roddy Piper and challenger Bret Hart. Bret is serious and Roddy isn’t. This doesn’t sit well with Bret and we’re ready to go. There are peanut butter and jelly sandwiches mentioned, making me hungry.

Intercontinental Title: Bret Hart vs. Roddy Piper

Staredown to start as this should be awesome to put it mildly. Arm drag by Piper to start which surprises Bret to put it mildly. Bret does the same and down goes Piper. This is shaping up well. Gorilla gives his strategy for the match from both perspectives. Heenan: I’d nail them out back with a tire iron.

After some nice amateur stuff Piper spits at Bret to make sure everyone knows he’s the heel. Test of Strength which is odd to see from guys like this. Bret grabs the arm and Piper can’t fight out of it. Gorilla lists off some of the countries that are watching Mania which is always cool to hear.

Bret hurts his shoulder on an armdrag and of course was faking as Heenan predicted. It results in a small package for two and Piper is hot. Bret gets a cross body and we hit the floor. Back in and Hart adjusts his boot, allowing Piper to lay in an uppercut to be the definite heel in this. That’s certainly the right choice at least. STIFF punch to the face follows.

Bulldog puts Bret down and he’s in trouble. Bret is busted BAD which was an unauthorized blade job but Bret lied and said it was hardway to avoid a fine or suspension. Flair bladed later on and nearly got fired over it. Bret gets a sunset flip out of nowhere to break Piper’s momentum but it just ticks him off and the beating continues.

Heenan again suggests going to get a chair and blast Bret with it. Bret gets a forearm out of nowhere to send Piper to the floor as the demon child from the Shawn match is at it again, this time in the pink corner. Both guys go down and Piper’s head is on Bret’s stomach but it’s not classified as a cover for no apparent reason. Heenan counts anyway but it doesn’t count of course because that’s not the finish.

Piper goes up so Bret drags him down by the hair. FREAKING…..nah it wasn’t that bad. Snap suplex gets two. Bret unleashes the Five Moves of Doom but the Sharpshooter is blocked. Well of course it was as he didn’t go for the elbow yet. He tries it out of order and gets caught by a boot. They slug it out from their knees and Bret takes control again.

Down goes the referee as we set up the ending. Bret eats steps and it’s all Piper here. Piper grabs the bell but can’t bring himself to swing it, thus preserving his face status. Heenan: “USE THE BELL! HIT HIM! WAFFLE HIM WITH IT! GIVE IT TO ME I’LL HIT HIM WITH IT!” Piper opts for a sleeper instead but Bret climbs up the ropes and backflips onto Piper for the pin to regain the title.

Rating: A. This match is as solid as they come. There’s very little that I find wrong with it aside from possibly the ending. Piper not using the bell was perfect, but after that it’s like they were told they had to end it immediately, which to me wasn’t good. Aside from that brief moment though, this was an excellent match.

Piper gives Bret the belt post match.

Bobby Heenan has a surprise, and he introduces via satellite, Lex Luger. Lex is a totally arrogant bastard here and he does it perfectly. This takes far longer than it should have.

Duggan, Slaughter, Virgil and Bossman make generic insults to their opponents.

The Nasties, Repo Man and Mountie counter with even weaker promos.

Jim Duggan/Sgt. Slaughter/Virgil/Big Bossman vs. Nasty Boys/Repo Man/The Mountie

Good night who picked these teams? It’s like a great melting pot of the undercard. This match is introduced by Ray Combs who was a popular game show host at the time. He makes some bad jokes at the expense of the heels. One decent line: “Repo Man was an unwanted child. His parents were hoping for a boy.”

My goodness how far have these guys fallen since last year? Nastys were tag champions, Mountie had been the IC Champion earlier that year, Bossman was in the IC Title match last year and Virgil had a fairly high profile match. Quadruple clothesline takes down everyone not named Repo Man. There are going to be WWF guys on Family Feud against World Bodybuilding guys.

Duggan vs. Sags starts us off officially. It’s a huge trainwreck of course with no real reason for anyone to be in there against anyone as none of these people were feuding at all. Everyone fights everyone for a little bit and nothing stands out whatsoever. Everything goes insane of course and the Nasties screw up, allowing Virgil to pin Knobbs.

Rating: F. No one cared and the match was a mess. This has to be a sold out crowd now with as much filler as we just saw. Awful match and at least it was short.

We recap Flair vs. Savage. Flair had arrived in November with the WCW Title, which is one of the most complicated stories in wrestling history so I’ll stay out of why he was allowed to have it, and claimed he was the REAL world champion. Due to him helping Taker beat Hogan for the WWF Title and the controversial way that Hogan won it back, the title was declared vacant. The winner of the 92 Rumble would be the new champion. Flair wins after Sid eliminated Hogan and Hogan pulls out Sid.

Flair and Perfect have a picture that is allegedly Liz from photos that she gave him before she met Macho. They had threatened to put these up on the big screen for everyone to see. This had been built up for months as the main feud in the company with neither one really having a clear advantage.

Flair had all these stories about he and Liz and some clearly doctored photos of the two, but nothing ever concrete. Macho Man won’t talk to Gene. However he will talk for a Coliseum Video exclusive. He says nothing of note.

This was supposed to be Hogan vs. Flair. Why that match never took place has never really been answered for sure, but the common answer is that the WWF started a real steroid policy and Hogan knew he was in trouble. After this show he took a near 8 month hiatus from the company, which even furthers that theory.

WWF World Title: Ric Flair vs. Randy Savage

What makes this match work even better is Heenan’s completely biased announcing. He doesn’t even pretend to be fair and it’s great. Savage jumps him in the aisle but Perfect makes the save. Totally personal feud here and even more proof that Hogan wasn’t needed to have a dramatic and great storyline for the world title. Savage no sells an atomic drop and hits a clothesline to take over.

Savage is even more insane here than usual if you can imagine that. Flair manages to backdrop Savage over the top to break his momentum though as Heenan cheers him on. There’s no Liz in sight at the moment. Flair chops away and Savage is in some trouble. Heenan is drooling over the thought of seeing the centerfolds of Liz that Flair promised.

Flair sends him to the floor and keeps working on the back. Total dominance here as Savage is sent back in. Savage gets a punch in and the fans pop huge just for that. A neckbreaker out of nowhere puts Flair down. Heenan needs a drink. He must have never been thirsty in WCW. Flair is slammed off the top with Savage stepping onto the bottom rope which isn’t something I’ve ever seen before.

Savage unleashes the clotheslines and even gets one as Flair is coming off the top for a long two. Heenan nearly had a heart attack off of that one. Savage sends him to the floor and hits the double axe to send Flair into the railing. He CLEARLY blades on camera which was a huge ordeal backstage as it wasn’t authorized at all and they nearly fired him over it. It’s a good one too.

Double axe off the top gets two. Crowd is WAY into this. The elbow hits but Perfect dives in for the save at the last possible second. Hebner doesn’t throw it out though and all three of the heels are furious. Perfect throws Flair an illegal object and Savage is knocked out cold….FOR TWO! The place erupts on the kickout and Heenan is beside himself.

Perfect grabs a chair and drills Savage in the knee (although it looked like he hit the knee that Savage isn’t holding) and the challenger is in trouble. Here comes Liz! A group of suits try to stop her, and one of them looks like a big dollar sign. As he’s coming down the aisle, he looks like money. You would be able to say HERE COMES THE MONEY. (It’s Shane McMahon if you have no idea what I’m going on aboug).

Flair goes after the knee like a shark smelling a big pile of Shark Chow and the Figure Four goes on. Like an IDIOT, Flair slaps Savage for not staying down. After literally being in the hold for over a minute Savage turns him over as Perfect cheats for the second time in the hold. Flair goes for a slam but Savage grabs a small package for two as the crowd is losing their collective mind.

Flair WOOs at Liz and hammers away even more. Knee Crusher (to the wrong leg) but Savage spins around and grabs a rollup with a handful of trunks (as we see Flair’s back AGAIN) to win the title again and blow the roof off. Post match Flair hits on Liz and she slaps the heck out of him. Perfect and Flair beat the tar out of Savage post match.

Rating: A+. I don’t love it as much as IC does, but this was amazing stuff. It went on forever and never got boring. The main big thing about this match is simple: there was a huge feud and title match, without Hulk Hogan. That hadn’t happened in almost 10 years and it proved that the WWF could live without him.

That being said, this is a totally underrated classic with both guys going insane and Savage fighting through impossible odds to win the title that he deserved. This was great stuff and of course it goes on halfway through the show as a world title change pales in comparison to Hogan vs. a monster right? Go watch this match as it’s awesome on a ton of levels.

Post match we get two of the best promos I’ve ever seen. You need to see these.

This feud was absolutely amazing on a ton of levels and the matches being great only pushed that further.

We see a clip from the Wrestlemania “press conference” where the #1 contender to the world title was named. Hogan was named the challenger and Sid was furious. He turned on Hogan in a tag match on SNME in a bad match where Hogan managed to beat Flair and Taker on his own afterwards.

Sid destroyed the Barber Shop set and got shampoo all over his face in a typically bad Sid bit. He destroyed a bunch of jobbers to bad 80s music apparently. And that of course transitions us to this.

Tatanka vs. Rick Martel

We get a pure filler here. Heenan’s commentary here is great as he’s trying to be deadly serious but any mention of Flair sets him off. Tatanka has Native Americans with him, despite no one caring at all. Martel just doesn’t care at all here and I can’t say I blame him at all.

If you ever want a textbook example of going through the motions, look right here. Neither care and while they’re not being lazy per se, there’s no story or spark in this match. It’s literally two guys performing moves on each other. Tatanka gets a roll up for the pin. I know that’s short but seriously, NOTHING happened here and there was no point to it being here.

Rating: D. They were kind of trying, but it kind of sucked. Nothing great here at all and just a filler after the title changing hands. Boring match and no one could have cared less. Well ok they probably could but it wouldn’t have been by much.

We see Money Inc. saying that they’re ready for the Natural Disasters. DiBiase is completely different than he was just a year ago, but it works just fine all the same.

The Natural Disasters are coming for the belts.

Tag Titles: Natural Disasters vs. Money Inc.

Heenan is still ticked and it’s still funny. Gorilla singes the praises of the challengers (the big fat guys) which more or less secures their loss here. Quake and IRS start but DiBiase comes in soon afterwards. The challengers overpower DiBiase who runs of course like a scared little girly man.

The big guys dominate as you would expect them to with Quake shoving DiBiase all over the place and then doing the same to IRS for awhile. Typhoon comes in and due to his high level of suck the champions beat him down pretty easily. This isn’t really going anywhere at all.

False hot tag to Earthquake gets us nowhere as we’re waiting to get to the ending so we can get to the “main event” because Hogan has to close out Mania right? Not much of a match going on here with a totally dead crowd. Finally we get the tag to Earthquake, the fat guys dominate and the champions leave to take the countout loss.

Rating: D-. Bad, bad match that no one wanted to see. The whole thing felt like it was weighed down by more weight than half of the Disasters weight multiplied by two. This went nowhere at all. The Disasters would get the titles eventually at a house show.

Brutus Beefcake reaffirms Hogan’s divineness.

Owen Hart vs. Skinner

This might last 90 seconds. Skinner hits a reverse DDT that does nothing. Hart rolls him up using the ropes and pins him. This was nothing.

Rating: N/A. Nothing at all here and a waste of time that could have gone to a real match.

Want to join the WWF Fan Club? Actually it does look pretty sweet.

Sid Justice is just hilarious. Anyone that calls Gene a fat blubbering stupid oaf is nothing but sweet.

We see an interview with Hogan and Vince from a week ago as Hulk teases that he’s retiring soon.  Sid isn’t pleased.

The point of this match is simple: Sid threw Hogan out of the Rumble and Hogan then pulled Sid out of the Rumble, giving Flair the belt. On a SNME, they teamed up to face Flair and Taker. Sid bailed on Hogan, who somehow still won the match. That brings us here. Hogan has talked about retiring, so this could be his last match. Sid jumps Hogan while his music is still playing. Hogan comes back to his music which is really pretty sweet.

Hulk Hogan vs. Sid Justice

The match is about what you would expect from these two. Hogan jumps Sid to start and beats him up while the music is playing. We finally slow things down with Sid taking over using, you guessed it, power moves. It’s all either guy can do so that’s what they went with of course.

We go back and forth to start, Sid takes over for awhile, and then Hogan comes back. Test of Strength gets us nowhere. Sid lands a move that I don’t think anyone had seen before in the WWF. It’s like a slam while he’s choking him. I can’t think of a name to use for it though. Anyone have any ideas?

Sid pounds away on Hogan for a good while as you would expect him to. We head to the floor for a bit and nothing happens at all. Now we hit the EVIL nerve hold that doesn’t really do anything. Hogan has had that put on him by people far more useless than Sid though so this gets Sid nowhere at all. Sidewalk Slam gets Sid out of trouble.

Hogan kicks out of Sid’s powerbomb, which was also a very rare move at the time. Hogan makes his standard comeback leading to the boot and slam. Sid kicks out of the legdrop! Sid’s manager Harvey WHipleman interferes causing the DQ, when all of a sudden Papa freaking Shango comes out for the double team.

As they beat on him, for absolutely no good reason the Warrior returns for the first time since about June for the save. This was a legitimate shock as no one believed that he was coming back. It definitely worked though and is a great surprise to end Mania, but it set up no more contact between Hogan and Warrior as far as I can remember. Double pose down to end the show.

Rating: D. It’s Hogan at Mania so it’s at least watchable. The original ending was Hogan has Sid beaten and Shango breaks up the pin for the DQ, but Shango missed his cue. Sid wasn’t being a jerk when he kicked out. He simply didn’t have another option. The ending made little sense though. It led to Warrior vs. Shango (which I was at the blowoff match), yet why Shango attacked was never explained.

As for the match, this was pretty freaking bad. No one bought this as the real main event but it’s Hogan so he has to go on last. The Warrior returning was a great thing but at the end of the day it should have been overshadowed by Savage and the title change. I’m not surprised though. After all it is Hogan.

Overall Rating
: B-. It’s certainly not bad, but it’s nothing epic. Why, in Hogan’s last match, wouldn’t he go over clean? The Warrior returning meant nothing at all either. However, the rest of the show has some absolute gems in it. Make sure you see the IC and World Title matches as both are classics.

This show led to Savage holding the title over the Summer yet rarely defending it. Flair would win it back in the Fall before dropping it to Bret Hart just under a year later. Shawn’s singles debut is obviously a big deal and the fillers go by quick. Of the 9 matches, 6 are pretty good if not great so this is an obvious recommendation




History of Wrestlemania with KB – Wrestlemania 6: Epitome of a One Match Show

Wrestlemania 6
Date: April 1, 1990
Location: SkyDome, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 67,678
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Jesse Ventura
O Canada: Robert Goulet

If you remember what I said in the last review about WM 5 being the first standard WM, this one is the first standard blockbuster Wrestlemania. This Mania has the truly huge show atmosphere to it and there are two main reasons for it. Number one is the crowd is massive. At over 67,000 people, this would be the second biggest crowd for a Wrestlemania for the next 11 years.

Second, you had the second biggest Wrestlemania Main event of all time which was title for title. Absolutely no one knew who to pick in this match. That to me is what makes a match at least a notch higher up. Also the actual look of the show changed. If you watch 4 and 5, you see the older look to it.

I’m not sure how to put it into words but if you watch either of them and then 6 one after another you’ll see what I mean. 6 simply looks much newer. I know that it’s a year later, but the jump is a huge difference. The card is long and while there’s some filler, it’s good filler. I’m a sucker for this show but I’ll try to be objective.

To begin with, one of the most memorable things about this show is the opening. It shows the night sky and talks about the constellations in it. Eventually we get to constellations of Hogan and Warrior. Vince’s booming voice over this scene makes the show and the match just seem epic.

Koko B. Ware vs. Rick Martel

Ok so not every match can be great. The newest WWE HOF member still makes me shake my head. Martel is a better choice than he is but that’s a topic for another thread. This is the WM debut of Martel’s Model gimmick. For this show the ring carts from WM 3 are back. For those that haven’t seen them, they’re small motorized carts that the wrestlers ride to the ring in. Kind of a cool idea.

I assume they’re used to prevent people from having to make the very long walk to the ring. You can tell how great Koko is. Gorilla’s line talking about how good he is: “He’s proven he can take anybody to the limit.” Read as, he can’t beat anyone. Koko only stands 5’8. Never knew how short he was. Martel is only 6’0 but it looks pretty funny to see the tiny face like that.

They actually thought this was the best possible opening match for Wrestle-freaking-Mania? Really? Frankie was always kind of cool. Martel jumps him to start and Koko is in trouble early on. Koko had a decent dropkick and that’s about it. Yet he’s in the Hall of Fame and Randy Savage isn’t. Amazing.

Martel sends him to the floor and Koko is in trouble. Ha I said that just as Gorilla did. The crowd starts a small boring chant and I can’t say I blame them. Boston Crab is blocked early. In the clipped version the first Boston Crab attempt is shown going on as Martel turns him towards the ropes and he winds up in the middle of the ring with it. Odd indeed.

Koko hits a pair of flying headbutts that just look awful. On the third one in one of the dumbest spots I’ve ever seen, he fakes the headbutt and after a second, Martel falls anyway. I could get that he was bracing himself and fell or something, but Koko gets a long two out of it. WOW. Missed cross body leads to the Boston Crab for the submission.

Rating: D. This was a squash and a bad one. Koko truly is bad in the ring. He’s bland and for whatever reason was popular. Bad way to start a show. Koko was one of those guys in the 80s that wasn’t any good but was pushed on occasion as a midcard threat anyway and more or less was a jobber to the stars. Weak opening match.

Andre and Haku, the Colossal Connection, are called the Colostomy Connection by Gene. Heenan says if you want to talk about evacuation…Wow again. They say they’re going to eliminate Demolition. Gene, as they leave: “The Colossal Connection, they’re anything but regular guys.” My goodness.

Demolition wants to destroy and demolish the Connection and take the belts back.

Tag Titles: Demolition vs. The Colossal Connection

This is Demolition’s rematch from when the Connection beat them in I believe December. It was also their chance to become three time tag champions. The crowd chants Weasel at Heenan which sounds great in this huge arena. This match is absolutely nothing but power all around. In something that I never realized before and someone correct me if I’m wrong but this was Andre’s last televised WWF match.

Andre jumps them to start and the challengers are in trouble early. Apparently the Harts want a shot at the winners. Smash and Haku officially start us off. I have a feeling we’ll be seeing the Islander a lot. Those big screens in the back are rather cool.

Andre only pops in every once in awhile to throw punches and choke. The perk of him being so freaking huge is that a simple move like one of those is enough to take a guy down and have it look very realistic.

This whole thing is pretty much just ok at best. Haku vs. Demolition isn’t a match I particularly care to see but it’s all they could do. I would kind of question putting the titles on the Connection simply to give Andre a title run in his career but it’s better than ignoring him I suppose. Axe gets beaten down for the majority of the match.

Haku wrestles almost all of the match here as Andre was in bad shape at this point. Haku accidentally superkicks Andre into the ropes and Demolition lands their finisher to pick up the titles. Post match, Heenan goes nuts on Andre in the corner, at one point clearly saying he’s the freaking boss. Then in something that boggles even my smark mind, Bobby slaps him. The look on Andre’s face is nothing short of great.

He grabs Bobby by the throat and slaps him a few times and punches him. He catches Haku’s thrust kick and beats the tar out of him too. Heenan and Haku get thrown off the cart as Andre leaves on his own to the crowd losing their minds. The sad part though is how hunched over Andre is. Truly a sad sight.

Rating: C-. This was a fun little match that wasn’t entirely predictable. The post match stuff is even better than the match. Ticked off giants are just plain fun. It’s more or less just a way to give the fans something to cheer for which works fine I guess. Nothing special at all but fun.

In the back we see Earthquake and Jimmy Hart who says that there’s going to be an earthquake and Earthquake says Hercules will crumble.

Hercules vs. Earthquake

Do I have to watch this? Seriously, what are you expecting here? Quake is undefeated here and is putting people in the hospital left and right. He tries to jump Hercules to start and Herc pounds away with punches.

We get a test of strength and being a heel, Earthquake cheats after getting in trouble. He pounds away with fat man moves before Herc gets a shot in. After a bunch of big power shots he can’t take Earthquake off his feet.

And then like an IDIOT, Hercules tries for the backbreaker (torture rack) and gets drilled. You freaking deserve that for being stupid. A few shots put him down and the Earthquake Splash ends it. He deserves pain like that too.

Rating: D-. I liked Hercules, but this was just bad. It wasn’t quite a squash but it might as well have been. He beats Hercules up more afterwards and he deserves it for being stupid enough to try the Rack like that. Earthquake would be top heel by August.

Some old lady named Rona Barrett talks to Liz who is going to be more active in wrestling.

Brutus Beefcake is going to end Mr. Perfect’s “perfect” record. He shows off how sharp his scissors are by snipping at the paper the record is on and the paper doesn’t cut. Amazing indeed.

Brutus Beefcake vs. Mr. Perfect.

Perfect beat the tar out of Beefcake at the Rumble so this is little more than a grudge match. Can’t beat that. That Brutus music is downright awesome. Gorilla STEALS Jesse’s line about Brutus looking like a hand grenade went off in his pocket. Wouldn’t that result in a bad leg injury?

They start off hard and fast again which is a tradition so far tonight. Brutus dominates to start, sending Perfect flying. He might still be undefeated here but I’m not sure. Things slow down a lot as we talk about conditioning.

Gorilla isn’t sure what the weak spot is on Hennig. I’d recommend hitting him in the face. Brutus goes for the sleeper as Mary Tyler Moore is here. This Mania is officially awesome. Genius slips the scroll to Perfect which gets two. I love that neck snap Perfect does. Beefcake makes his comeback and hits a slingshot into the post for the pin out of NOWHERE.

Rating: C. Compared to what’s come before it, this match is Steamboat and Savage. Brutus, for all his faults, wasn’t that bad in the ring. Having a guy with him like Hennig helped a lot, and this might be Brutus’ biggest win ever. The postmatch beatdown is very old school pink on pink action fun as well.

Post match the Genius gets a haircut for his troubles.

To say this match is interesting would be an understatement. We see a video recapping the buildup. This match came about because Piper eliminated Bad News from the Rumble and Bad News came back in and eliminated him. They fought to the back. For those that don’t know, Brown was legit. He is the only American heavyweight to win a medal in Olympic Judo, and also made Andre the Giant back down in a real fight in Japan after Andre made a racist joke. Anyway, 3 weeks after the Rumble, Bad News made a joke about Piper’s kilt which is just too far.

In a promo that would never be allowed to air today, Piper is in the back and says he’s the Hot Rod, but at other times he’s the Hot Scot. At that point, he turns around and you see that half of his body is painted back right down the middle. After a brief karaoke of Billy Jean, Piper insults Brown’s looks in a funny promo and says he’s going to shut Bad News’ big mouth, but Brown doesn’t know if it’ll be Hot Rod or Hot Scot that does it.

I’m still not sure what the point of the whole painting thing was.

Roddy Piper vs. Bad News Brown

I think this is no DQ but I’m not sure. This isn’t so much a match as it is a fight. Very few wrestling moves and mainly punches and kicks but it was designed to be that way. The fighting is fun because it’s what these two are best at. Surprisingly Piper is ripped here in by far the best shape he’s ever been in.

Allegedly that paint took weeks to get off due to a rib from Andre and someone else. Not sure how true that is. Yeah there’s no wrestling at all here. Sometimes that’s a great thing though and here that’s exactly what this should be like.

The way Brown beats up Roddy and then Roddy just casually pokes him in the eye is great. Brown gets sent into exposed steel and is down. Piper pulls out a white glove as we continue the Michael Jackson theme night which I suppose is what the black and white thing is about. Match ends in a double count out and it means nothing. They continue brawling all the way up the ramp and into the back.

Rating: A. This match was nonstop fighting and was insanely fun. There was next to no wrestling in it but that that’s what made it great. I loved this match the first time I saw it and it’s still great. And yes that’s highly biased.

Steve Allen, the former Tonight Show host, is in a bathroom with a piano with the Bolsheviks practicing the Russian National Anthem. He makes a few jokes but finally says he’ll do the real Russian Anthem. He opens his mouth and a toilet flushes. Steve runs to save his own life.

Hart Foundation vs. The Bolsheviks

The Harts want Demolition. This match literally lasts 19 seconds. Harts knock the Bolsheviks down during their singing, land the Hart Attack and it’s over.

Rating: N/A. What can I say about 19 seconds? Funny if nothing else. The pop for Hart is coming too. It’s not there yet but you can see the star in him. Granted that might be the Canada thing

Wrestlemania 7 is coming to the Los Angeles Memorial Coliseum and there will be over 100,000 fans there!

Edit from the future: no there won’t be. Ticket sales bombed and they moved it to the Sports Arena in the same town which held about 16,000 people.

Barbarian vs. Tito Santana

Tito does a promo that I literally couldn’t pay attention to. This match screamed HOUSE SHOW to me. It’s two guys in a ring doing moves on each other. There’s little psychology and less meaning to most of it. It’s not bad wrestling, but there’s no spark to it at all. Santana is a great worker, but this match just did nothing for me.

Yeah this isn’t much at all. Santana does a bit, Barbarian hits the floor to hide a bit with Heenan, Jesse makes enchilada jokes, Barbarian comes back in, and we let the destruction begins. It’s not bad but at the same time this isn’t much at all.  It’s not boring, but I wonder why this is on Wrestlemania.  Barbarian wins with a clothesline off the top that was sweet looking.

Rating: D. Like I said, it’s not bad at all, but it just did nothing for me. I don’t get the need for this being on here though as Tito was destroyed both here and at Summerslam by the Powers of Pain. I guess I get the idea of having them get good matches (in theory) but really? This needed to be on Mania?

Next up is a recap of the upcoming mixed tag which I believe was a first at the time. Sapphire, as worthless of a person as there ever has been in wrestling, is shown beating up Sherri which just infuriates me, and Macho King feuding with the Common Man Dusty Rhodes. Fairly cool concept for a feud really, even though Dusty boarders on Communism in his promo. He also talks about having the Crown Jewel but no one knows what they mean.

Macho King and Queen Sherri vs. Dusty Rhodes and Sapphire

The King having people carry him to the ring on the throne was always just insanely cool to me for some reason. The fun part of this for some reason was figuring out the women’s weight based on the male’s weights. Sherri at about 130-140 and Sapphire at 180-190, which Jesse says is impossible and I think I agree with him. The more Dusty promos I hear the more I like him. His mic work is great.

Dusty says that they have something Macho doesn’t have, which is the Crown Jewel. The Crown Jewel is none other than Elizabeth. For the first time in way too long, Savage absolutely loses it. The crowd pops louder than they’ve done all night as she goes to Dusty and Sapphire’s corner.

Liz is definitely good looking in blue. The genders have to match up here so that’s good. Sapphire is just horrible. One of her attacks is a hip into the other chick’s hips. I can’t believe I’m going to say this but GET BACK TO DUSTY!

Dusty does what he can here and it’s just not working for the most part. A lot of this is the girls doing what they can which isn’t much for the most part as they’re just not very good. Well Sherri is but she can’t work miracles. Savage destroys Dusty until the required big comeback makes the save.

This match is all over the place the entire match and it’s incredibly fun. Rhodes is at his best when he can just go crazy in a match and that’s what this is. Dusty is in the ring the entire time almost which is the best thing possible. Dusty is just on fire the whole time and Savage is his usual great self. Sapphire finally gets in the ring and proves my theory: she is awful. Sadly enough, she pins Sherri in a dark day for wrestling. Liz actually dances with Dusty and Sapphire to Common Man after the match.

Rating: D-. Sapphire literally drops this about a full letter grade. She was flat out awful and there is no reason she should have pinned Sherri at all. Dusty and Savage carry this to a decent grade though. It’s a sad day that Dusty Rhodes is the workhorse of his team but that was the case here.

Hey, did you know WM 7 will be in Los Angeles? Don’t know if the promo that aired earlier would get the message across or not.

Heenan is upset. Okerlund is all over the place tonight as he says, “Bobby Heenan where do you have the ba…guts to insult Andre the Giant?” You can clearly see Bobby almost lose it after that. He declares war on Andre and says he’ll be getting a new Heenan Family together.

That old woman from earlier is with Gorilla and Jesse in the back and yet again, I couldn’t care less. Allegedly there’s a clip of Jesse in an adult movie out there somewhere. Never heard anything about that and I don’t think it’s true.

Macho Man cuts a promo that makes literally no sense. I think it’s about Dusty Rhodes.

Demolition is glad to have won the titles in the fifth promo in a row. They say the Harts can bring it on.

In promo #6, Hogan cuts one of his most famous promos ever, telling Warrior that the power lies in the palm of his hand. He also says that he can save all of the Little Warriors with the training, the prayers and the vitamins. Hogan goes on to say that his Hulkamaniacs want to help them. Rewatching this, it’s clear that Hogan would lose. He mentions that the winner or the loser doesn’t matter, but what kind of winner or loser you are.

At the end of the show, he hands the belt to Warrior and holds up his hand, being a “good loser.” Wow it’s fun to see these in a different light. Also starting to wonder if “take your vitamins” is a tongue in cheek reference to taking steroids, but that might be a stretch.

Guess what’s next? Go on, guess. If you said Promo #7, I’ll get you a ham sandwich. In an equally famous promo, Warrior says that Hogan’s life can be lived through the Warrior, but it will be in the darkness. Everything is about accepting challenges, but Hogan has never met a challenge like him. He’s going to bring the Warriors and the Hulkamaniacs together as one.

Rockers vs. Orient Express

See, this is what I loved about the 80s and early 90s: the tag division was AWESOME. There were at least 8 distinctly gimmicked teams fighting all over the place. There were jobber teams, midcard teams and main event tag teams. These teams almost always had great matches together. They had a great one at the 91 Rumble so hopefully this holds up.

Tanaka vs. Jannetty opens us up. Surprisingly enough this is pretty fast paced to start. Fuji interferes with the cane to set up Marty as the Ricky Morton for this match. And never mind as Shawn is already back in. Tanaka takes him down with a cross body for no cover.

The fans are into this which is always a good sign. It’s actually Shawn as the face in peril here which is the custom of the Rockers. It’s weird to see the Rockers getting outworked. Marty comes in to more or less no pop which is odd.

The double teaming by the good guys begins and Tanaka takes a big old flipping flip off a double back drop. Fuji trips Janetty and salt goes into his eyes as he falls into the crowd. Are we sure he’s not just drunk? He gets counted out to let evil win the day.

Rating: C. Semi-filler, but that doesn’t mean it has to be bad. This is definitely the weakest of their feud which is saying a lot as this was sitll fine. Not a bad match but not great really. The ending more or less sucked but that isn’t incredibly bad. It set up a future match I guess but I wasn’t big on it.

Steve Allen is with Rhythm and Blues. Allen says he hasn’t been so excited since he heard Pee Wee Herman was straight. Good grief this show was pushing things for 1990.

Jim Duggan vs. Dino Bravo

Duggan waves the American flag in Canada. Well no one ever said he was intelligent. Jesse is impressed by the crowd as he should be. It’s huge. This is your standard power brawl and with Duggan in there, it’s likely not going to be that great. Surprising no one, it’s pretty dull.

The crowd is into it though so that’s good. Here’s some punching. And some kicking. Plus some more punching. Ooo it’s a back breaker. Yeah it’s one of those matches. Never been a fan of these matches but they’re trying…..ok not really but it sounds good.

Earthquake and Hart interfere of course. We get an argument about manager’s licenses and all that jazz which goes nowhere. Eventually the referee yells at him leading to a 2×4 to Bravo’s back and a pin. Post match Quake beats the heck out of Duggan.

Rating: D+. It was bad but they kept it short which was very smart. These two were thrown out there on a ton of Superstars shows which went nowhere. This was too short and it never went anywhere at all which doesn’t surprise me at all. Weak match and filler. It’s just not a good sign when there’s nothing to bring the crowd down from. You can tell they’re here for one match only.

Video package showing Jake Roberts stealing DiBiase’s Million Dollar Belt which happened over the course of about a year for some reason. Jake is in the back and cuts what might be one of the best promos I’ve ever seen. He starts by saying this is the biggest match in DiBiase’s career. At that moment I thought this was going to suck because 2 years ago he was main eventing WM for the World Title.

But then Jake started talking about DiBiase’s values and his life, and something impressive happened: I believed him. That my friends, is why Jake Roberts is considered great. He was able to make you believe something that wasn’t true. That is what psychology in wrestling is. He did something that made you believe in what he was trying to sell to you. Greatness indeed.

Ted DiBiase vs. Jake Roberts

If there are two better 80s performers that never got a real chance in the main event, I’d like to see them. Jake dominates at first and goes to town on DiBiase’s arm but as DiBiase pretends to bail, Jake gets caught by him. I hope this is a Canadian tradition and not a sign of boredom but the Wave begins in the SkyDome which really is an impressive sight in a crowd that big. I kind of see it as disrespectful though.

A wide shot shows that the ring is on a pedestal/platform kind of thing which really is cool. Jake immediately goes for the DDT but can’t get anywhere with it. This is your standard match between these guys with a LONG chinlock. These two fought time and time again, usually for the Million Dollar Belt, and it never went anywhere.

Jake makes his usual comeback and then gets taken down again. And there’s the chinlock again. Was Ted afraid to do much other than something like that? Apparently it’s to get through the Wave. Well that makes sense. Jake makes his comeback and still I will say that no one bumps as well as DiBiase does for his size. They go outside and DiBiase locks in the Dream again but goes into the post.

Virgil him back in before the 10 though and DiBiase gets the win. Post match Jake comes back and beats both men up, sending money flying everywhere. Virgil gets away with the money but Jake gets a picture perfect DDT on DiBiase and the fans explode. You can see the head slam off the mat and it looks great. Jake then hands out the real $100 bills that DiBiase dropped, including one to Hollywood legend Mary Tyler Moore.

Rating: C. Well they tried but the whole Wave = chinlock thing messed up a lot of their stuff. They tried as hard as they could but the crowd was against them here. This was a huge feud and DIBiase gets the title back via countout but whatever. The number of matches is hurting the show again.

In the back, we hear Slick talk about why Bossman turned face, which was because he wouldn’t be paid off by DiBiase to do his bidding, saying that he was a fair law enforcer. That split up the team of Bossman and Akeem so we get this match. Bossman, which is really a great gimmick, another great feature of the 80s, says that he’s proud to be an American. Great way to be a face buddy.

Akeem vs. Big Boss Man

Bossman’s eyes are sweet looking on the way to the ring. Before the match, DiBiase, the guy that tried to buy off Bossman in the fall, comes from under the ring and beats up Bossman so Akeem dominates to begin with. Bossman lands a great boot to the face though to break the momentum.

He’s down and trying to get his breath but then just snaps up like absolutely nothing is wrong with him. It looked REALLY bad. He goes off on Akeem and a few seconds later an amazing Bossman Slam considering Akeem’s size gets the pin. Post match, Bossman punches Slick.

Rating:N/A. Just another quickie and it gets nowhere at all.

Sean Mooney is in the crowd and asks if people are looking forward the Rhythm And Blues singing. Mary Tyler Moore is apparently a wrestling fan and I now love her even more than I did before.

Now we get the famous scene from this show: the Pink Cadillac carrying Rhythm And Blues. The reason this is famous? The owner and driver of the car is none other than future two time, two time WCW World Heavyweight Champion, Diamond Dallas Page. He was just about to debut in WCW at the time. He actually might have already but if he had he had been there all of a month.

They perform their new song, Hunka Hunka Hunka Honkey Love (Word wants to murder me for that) and it’s bad. You can see Jimmy Hart is the only one that has a clue what he’s doing which makes sense.

For those of you that don’t know, Jimmy Hart was the main person responsible for all of the mind blowing songs used in the WWF in the 80s and early 90s. Back in the 60s he was lead singer for a band called the Gentrys that had a big hit called Keep On Dancing. They went on tour with the Beach Boys so apparently they had something going for them. Hart brought that legit talent to wrestling music and it worked really well.

For God knows what reason, the Bushwackers appear selling programs at ringside. Realizing that these are the worst disguises of all time, they pull them off and run off Rhythm and Blues before destroying their guitars. Kind of funny, more stupid though. The funniest part of this is Jesse referencing a CD and Gorilla doesn’t sound that sure as to what it is.

Yet again, WM 7 in Los Angeles. The sad thing is I remember the real commercials that had the ticket number in it that’s been edited out since. I could literally quote the ticket number in this if I wanted to. That’s kind of sad.

New SkyDome attendance record of 67,678 people. These announcements are always kind of cool to me. However, the fans seem completely uncaring about this.

Rick Rude vs. Jimmy Snuka

This match is pure filler before the main event. Steve Allen is on commentary here. Standard match here for these two. Back and forth which makes it a decent match. Snuka doing the hip swivel is funny if nothing else. Rude wins with a Rude Awakening. Steve Allen has some very funny lines in this and it boosted the match a lot. For those that may have forgotten, Allen was kind of like the Jay Leno of his time, just not quite as famous but very close to it.

Rating: C-. Funny and that’s it. No one cares as it’s time for Hogan vs. Warrior.

And now it’s time for the main event. First up of course is a recap though. It stated with the two of them saying nice things about each other in their promos and then they wound up being alone together in the Rumble. They do a nicely choreographed routine ending in a double clothesline, but DANG was it exciting to see it at the time. This would be like Hogan and Austin today.

A week later they were in a tag match with Mr. Perfect and his manager/partner the Genius. Hogan and Warrior win but afterwards the brawl continues. Hogan gets nailed by mistake with a Warrior clothesline. A month later Warrior is in trouble against Earthquake and Hogan makes the save after the match for Mania had been announced. Two weeks after that, same scenario, just switch Hogan and Warrior.

In other words, Earthquake was a very scary man. Hogan tries to get up and Warrior runs back and forth. Hogan has his back to him and Warrior raises his arm for a clothesline but stops dead. Then Hogan turns and puts his fists up. Warrior hits the ropes again, hops to the floor and runs away. Seriously, this guy was messed up at times.

Intercontinental Title/WWF Title: Hulk Hogan vs. The Ultimate Warrior

This was dubbed The Ultimate Challenge and both belts were on the line. Warrior’s music hits and I don’t ever recall a crowd going from dead to insane so quickly, at least not until Austin and the glass shattering began. Everything about this match is absolutely epic. Even the entrances just feel big if that makes sense. This is what Wrestlemania was supposed to end with and it works perfectly here.

Absolutely great job in building this up as face vs. face was very risky and still is hard to do today. Hogan’s ovation is clearly louder, but not by much. In one of the coolest scenes ever, Hogan’s music plays and as we pan from the crowd to the entry way, Warrior is seen standing on the middle rope doing his press slam motion. I marked out beyond belief just for the entrances.

It’s hard to do, but they awakened the inner young fan in me, the Hulkamaniac that lurks inside my soul. One thing I’ve always wondered: when Warrior comes to the ring, he clearly has his symbol painted on his chest, yet 5 minutes into the match it’s gone without a trace. That’s too fast to have been knocked off and wouldn’t there be traces if it was sweated off?

Crowd is white hot for this. Both guys shove each other away. And now for the iconic moment of the match: the test of strength. Warrior puts Hogan down but Hogan comes back and puts Warrior down. Hogan gets a slam and Warrior pops up. Warrior gets a slam and Hogan doesn’t pop up.

Hogan goes to the floor and holds his knee. This will NEVER be mentioned again after it gets better. The key thing here though: it lets Hogan be able to say that Warrior didn’t beat him at his best. The referee keeps trying to protect Hogan and Warrior is like screw you short man.

Naturally Hogan is fine now so the knee thing is completely forgotten, never to be mentioned again. Hogan gets the worst chinlock ever to take over for awhile. He puts Warrior down and waits awhile before covering after a clothesline. Ok then.

Back to the chinlock now as this is going more or less nowhere at all. A belly to back suplex fills in the wrestling quota for tonight. He gets his fourth chinlock to fill in time. Double clothesline and both go down after Hogan has taken next to no punishment this whole time.

Warrior does an Undertaker sit up before Taker was around. Warrior Warriors Up and the bald man is in trouble. Bear hug goes on Hogan. There are FAR more rest holds in this than I remember. This one goes on for like two and a half minutes.

And down goes the referee. Hogan gets what would be a three count. Warrior gets what would be a three count. Warrior hammers away and manages to get the press slam and the splash for two as the fans are in shock.

He Hulks Up as Warrior pounds away on him. Three punches and a big boot set up the leg drop. The leg drop amazingly misses and Warrior hits a big splash and wins the title in one of the biggest shockers of all time.

Rating: A+. This match lived up to the amazing hype that it got and showed that Hogan could work a long match that wasn’t in his normal formula. It also showed that Warrior did indeed have the capabilities to wrestle well if given the right opponent, which he had also done with Rude. While I think Hogan should have kept the title, that doesn’t mean that it was a bad match, because it was great.

The finish made sense and didn’t make Hogan look weak but made Warrior look strong. That’s hard to do. I don’t know what I can say about this match that hasn’t already been said. For both men, it’s likely the match of their lives. They have nearly 68,000 people in the palms of their hands for nearly 23 minutes and it never lets up once. Everything is a small war and the crowd knows it. Every little thing in this match is done well and that makes it a classic.

Both men do their signature no pain things, and you literally didn’t know who was going to win. When Hogan hulked up, I truly believed for a split second he was going to win. That’s great work. The finish to this epic struggle came when Hogan missed the leg drop and Warrior splashed him for the pin, and wrestling changed forever. Jesse’s shout of THE WARRIOR’S WON THE TITLE is absolutely perfect.

After Hogan hands him the belt and steals a bit of the spotlight, the arena goes a bit darker and pyro goes off all over the place. The big screens show Warrior shaking the ropes with the belt in hand and it’s just amazing to look at. A great ending to a great match and show.

Overall Rating: C+. This was a really hard decision for me because based on the main event, the Brown/Piper match and a few others, this show is really great to watch. However, there’s some flaws that keep it from being perfect. For one thing and I didn’t really touch on this, the time it took to get to the ring was just way too long. I know there’s not much they could do about that, but it really slowed things down at times.

Also, there were too many short matches. The card doesn’t need to have everyone on the card. Take the opener for example. That was a waste of nearly 10 minutes counting introductions. Finally, WAY too many backstage promos. We don’t need an interview before every match. It’s just overkill at that point. However, those are simply keeping a great show from being legendary.

This show had the real Wrestlemania feel to it and it shows. It was supposed to be an epic show and it lived up to it. The matches were for the most part good, stories were advanced, things were memorable, and it was fun. Definite recommendation here as so far, it’s the second best Mania and arguably the best along with 3. Los Angeles, here we come!




History of Wrestlemania with KB – Wrestlemania 4: One Big Tournament And That’s It

Wrestlemania 4
Date: March 27, 1988
Location: Trump Plaza, Atlantic City, New Jersey
Attendance: 18,165
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Jesse Ventura
America The Beautiful: Gladys Knight

This show was in a way a turning point and in a way a step backwards for the WWF. There was no way that Wrestlemania 3 was going to be topped. The problem was, after Hogan had beaten Andre the previous year, there was no one left to challenge him that would be seen as a legitimate contender. The only option was a rematch with Hogan and Andre, but Andre was hurting badly here and would need time off after the match.

Also, the title had to be taken off of Hogan for awhile to refresh his character. Now this whole show is based around one incident that took place two days after I was born on a live broadcast called The Main Event. After everyone had seen Hogan allegedly get pinned the previous year, we all needed a rematch. In between there was a new PPV developed called the Survivor Series that was established solely to continue Hogan and Andre’s feud. Now that is a sign of a huge feud.

So, on February 5, 1988, we got one. Hulk Hogan against Andre the Giant for the World’s Heavyweight Championship on free television. You may hear about Raw getting a 4.3 and it being huge. This show got a 15.8. That is a record that has never even been remotely approached and never will be. Anyway, this time around Andre had Ted DiBiase in his corner. Hogan knocks Andre down and leg drops him, but there’s no referee because of Virgil, DiBiase’s body guard.

Hogan goes after Virgil as Andre gets up. Andre headbutts Hogan a few times and lands a butterfly suplex and covers him. Hogan clearly gets his shoulder up at two but the referee doesn’t stop his count. Andre is declared the champion and immediately hands the belt to DiBiase, who had spent months trying to buy the title from Hogan. Immediately after this, another referee comes down that is literally identical to the referee that just called the match.

It’s the Hebners, that no one ever knew were identical twins. On Sunday, the President of the WWF Jack Tunney declares the title vacant and announces a one night, single elimination, 14 man tournament to determine the undisputed champion. Hogan and Andre both get byes into the second round as they were the two that started all this.

If you can handle anymore history about this show, this was also one of the first true battles in what would become WCW vs. WWF. WCW (the NWA but for the sake of sanity we’ll call it what it would become), had a PPV in November called Bunkhouse Stampede. Vince had come up with the Survivor Series and wanted to force WCW out of the spot.

He threatened to not allow the PPV companies to air Wrestlemania if they didn’t air the Survivor Series instead of Bunkhouse Stampede. The PPV companies gave in and a huge majority aired Survivor Series while only a handful aired WCW’s show, which they had initially agreed to show. Fast forward five months and it’s time for Wrestlemania 4. WCW is still ticked off about November.

One thing you have to factor in is PPV was a VERY different thing back then. In 1986 there was 1 WWF PPV which was Wrestlemania 2. In 87 there were two, 88 had 3 with the introduction of Summerslam and 89 had 4 which I believe was the standard until 1991 or 1992. It wasn’t until about 1996 that the PPV schedule became what it is today. But anyway, WCW had to retaliate so they came up with what was called the Clash of the Champions.

What this was more or less was a PPV on free television. Beginning at the same time as WM 4 but ending almost two hours earlier, COTC clearly pulled away a lot of viewers. It was headlined by Sting vs. Ric Flair for the World Title in what just about everyone agrees was the night Sting established himself as a legitimate superstar. The war was on and it would heat up soon but we’ll get to that later. Let’s get to it.

20 Man Battle Royal

Boris Zhukov, Brian Blair, Danny Davis, George Steele, Harley Race, Hillbilly Jim, Jacques Rougeau, Jim Brunzell, Jim Neidhart, Jim Powers, Junkyard Dog, Ken Patera, Nikolai Volkoff, Paul Roma, Bad News Brown, Raymond Rougeau, Ron Bass, Sam Houston, and Sika.

After that long winded explanation, the show is underway in a completely unrelated 20 man battle royal. There’s a huge trophy for the winner which just looks out of place in a wrestling match. Before the match Bob Uecker joins up with Gorilla and Jesse for the first match. Also on the show is Vanna White but she won’t be seen until later. Anyway back to the match.

Big names in this include Bret Hart, Bad News Brown who I always was a mark for, JYD and Harley Race. It’s really a who’s who of the midcard and not much more. This is the first of 16 matches on the card so this is going to be a LONG night. A subplot in this match is George Steel who is in the match but never actually gets in the ring. Pretty standard battle royal with various people punching and kicking each other as people are randomly eliminated.

The final three are the JYD, Bad News Brown and Bret Hart. The heels team up on JYD and eventually eliminate him. The pair agree to split the winnings but Bad News hits an enziguri on Bret and throws him out. Post match, Bret comes in and beats up Brown before destroying the trophy.

Rating: C. It’s hard to rate battle royals as it’s really just waiting until the end. Not much here but the post match stuff is fun to see. It’s time for the first match of the tournament which has time limits of 15 minutes. Robin Leech reads a proclamation that no one cares about to kick us off.

First Round Match: Jim Duggan vs. Ted DiBiase

Before the match, Jesse explains that only winners advance and that in the case of a draw both are eliminated. First round matches have 15 minute time limits, second are 20 minutes, third are 30 minutes, and the final has no limit.

DiBiase has Andre and Virgil with him for this match. Pretty simple match as we have a power brawler against a technician. Pretty back and forth which is fun but you knew the way this was ending before it starts. Duggan goes for his finisher and Andre grabs his foot and punches him as DiBiase hits him with a knee and pins him to advance.

Rating: C-. Fine for what it was, but predictable. Duggan was more or less a walking definition of cannon fodder here as DiBiase was destined to go on to the finals here and continue to be the top heel in the company. This was a decent enough match but it really wasn’t anything special at all.

Beefcake talks about winning the IC title tonight.

First Round Match: Don Muraco vs. Dino Bravo

Bravo has Frenchy Martin with him who was a pointless manager that was around for a year or two. Muraco has Billy Graham who has him wearing tye dye. This leads to Jesse continuing one of his running jokes that Graham stole the idea from him. Gorilla counters with “Graham was world champion once too.”

Jesse says that he never went for it that hard and Graham beat a weak champion. Funny antics always. Anyway, this is power vs. power here and not incredibly great. They trade power moves and holds for awhile until Muraco starts to get the advantage. End comes when Muraco hits the ropes and Bravo pulls the referee in leading to the DQ.

Rating: D+. Nothing of note here in a rather boring match. Muraco was again just filling in space and not really worth much. Bravo was floundering around for the vast majority of his WWF career and this was certainly no exception. Pretty boring match and it never went anywhere at all.

Bob Uecker is with the Honky Tonk Man who says Brutus isn’t going to cut any hair tonight.

First Round Match: Ricky Steamboat vs. Greg Valentine

Now this match is a match that changed Steamboat’s career. Allegedly he asked for some time off to be with his newborn son and Vince said no way. Dragon was gone a few months later and was in the NWA again, although he would up as a world champion there, so take it however you want it.

What are you expecting here? Of course the match is solid. It’s back and forth all match with Dragon chopping the tar out of Valentine and then bumping like a madman. We see a shot of Donald Trump at ringside. Dragon and Valentine go back and forth and put on a solid match with Dragon pulling away at the end. He goes up for a high cross body but Valentine rolls through it and uses the tights for a pin.

Rating:C. Not bad but not great, could have been very good with another 7-8 minutes. These two are the epitome of old school and the match more or less was as well. Valentine could have been something very special if not for Hogan coming in and changing wrestling for all time. Steamboat was gone very soon after this.

Bulldogs and Koko have trained Matilda to be a weasel dog. Heenan’s nickname was Weasel in case that made no sense at all.

First Round Match: Randy Savage vs. Butch Reed

Reed has a great chance for the upset here don’t you think?

*steps on all the crickets*

Reed was supposed to be a big deal but that never came to pass. He was even scheduled to be a Horseman but again it didn’t happen. I never got the appeal of him but that’s just me. Liz looks GREAT in blue. Reed struts to start and Savage can’t get anything going for the most part. Again I ask those that say Savage was a power guy: when was this ever the case? I’ve never seen it.

Jesse and Gorilla agree that Steamboat losing to Valentine is an upset. That’s rather odd indeed. This is rather boring to put it mildly. Reed hits a fist drop off the middle rope for no cover as it’s all Reed here. Savage gets some punches in but gets his head taken off with a clothesline. Reed goes up to the top like an idiot and talks FOREVER before getting slammed off. Elbow sends Savage to the semis.

Rating: D. Too short to get anything going but the elbow is always sweet. Reed’s jawing was just kind of stupid and I don’t get the point in having him dominate the vast majority of this one only to have a pair of moves end this. It wasn’t horrible but it needed more going on than what it had if that makes sense.

Heenan and the Islanders say that they’re not worried about Matilda or the Bulldogs.

First Round Match: One Man Gang vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

I can feel Irish’s jaw hitting the floor from here. Bigelow has Oliver Humperdink with him while Gang has Slick. Those might be the best manager names ever. Gang continues to be one of the worst big men of all time. Bammer is impressing me here, even throwing up a cross body block. For a guy weighing 393, that’s very impressive. Bam Bam dominates and is going for something but Slick pulls the rope down sending him to the floor for a count out in a cheap finish.

Rating: N/A. Decent clash of titans but the ending was just awful. Bigelow was supposed to get a huge push soon after this and it just never came, which I believe was due to a knee injury. Again though with less than three minutes, how into it can I get when almost a minute of that is brawling on the floor?

Hulk Hogan then says that he’s going to slam Andre in one of the most insane promos I’ve ever seen. He talks about the fault line breaking off and everyone falling into the ocean and how Donald Trump would be smart enough to let go of his materialistic possessions and dog paddle with his wife and kids to safety.

Then Hogan talks about taking all of the Hulkamaniacs on the largest back in the world and dog paddling and backstroking all the way to safety. If they’re on his back and he backstrokes, wouldn’t they kind of drown? God bless cocaine.

First Round Match: Rick Rude vs. Jake Roberts

Rude is about as perfectly evil as you can be and he plays it beautifully. Jake’s music was just awesome always. This match is solid but a tad boring. One of the great things about it though was you had no idea at all who was going to win it which to me is what makes a match better. What’s the point in watching a predictable match barring being a diehard fan of either person in it?

There was a red hot feud between these two a few months before this and it didn’t ever get the proper blowoff that it should. This match is about fifteen minutes long and maybe 5 minutes or more is chinlock. Jake escapes and goes for the DDT but can’t get it and then back to the chinlock. The draw is clearer than any draw should possibly be. They might as well just have a big sign advertising it.

These two go back and forth but the pace is just too slow. Crowd breaks out a boring chant more than once. Jake keeps wanting the DDT the whole match and Rude keeps trying to get out of it. Finally we get down late in the match and the draw looms over us. After a much better ending, we get to that point and the One Man Gang is in the semifinals.

Rating: D. Solid ending but getting there was a bit painful. I think this match is 40% chinlock. Don’t like the draw either. There were stretches of probably five minutes where I had ZERO to talk about due to it being nothing but bare basics and chinlocks. The crowd is officially dead now so hopefully we get something to perk them up again.

We go to a big bracket to see Vanna White give her limited thought on the tournament. Nothing special here. Vanna looks better with straight hair.

In case you got lost, here’s the updated brackets

Hogan vs. Andre

Dibiase vs. Murago

Savage vs. Valentine

Gang gets a bye and is into the third round already

Ultimate Warrior vs. Hercules

Nothing special to this feud at all as they’re simply fighting over who is stronger than who. Nothing more to it than that. No entrance for Herc here. Warrior is nothing special at all here and is just a guy that destroys jobbers and runs to the ring. They ram into each other which gets them nowhere and then lock up.

Three clotheslines from Hercules take down Warrior which stuns Jesse. This is a lot of striking and the occasional power move. In short, it’s very boring indeed. They fight on the floor and tease a countout but get back in in time.

Warrior gets the punches in the corner but Herc gets an atomic drop out of the corner. Full nelson goes on mostly but Hercules can’t get the fingers locked so Warrior can walk up the turnbuckle and drop backwards before shooting a shoulder up for the pin. Warrior clears the ring with the chain post match.

Rating: D. Oh man this was bad. Neither guy was worth anything but at least it was short. This was a rather boring match and somehow Warrior would be in the big undercard match the following year and the main event the year after that. This was pretty bad though but like I said it was only about five minutes long.

REALLY long recap of the Hogan Andre feud.

Second Round Match: Hulk Hogan vs. Andre the Giant

Andre has DiBiase and Virgil with him for this. Much faster pace than last year’s match which to me is an improvement. Andre just goes off to start this match. Hogan breaks it up with some running punches/forearms but DiBiase gets on the apron. Hogan rams them together with the all time best name move: the Double Noggin Knocker. Andre’s offense here is just so simple that it’s great.

This is one of those matches where you can tell Andre just has nothing left so they’re going with REALLY basic stuff to make it look like he’s still awesome when he can barely move. It says a lot that he wrestled at two more Manias and appeared at #7.

Hogan gets in control, Andre chokes him. Hogan gets knocked down, Andre sits on him. Hogan starts running, Andre turns his back to him and Hogan falls down. It’s so simple yet so effective. Hogan comes back and signals for a slam but DiBiase cracks him with a chair as the ref is distracted. Hogan nails Andre with the chair, Andre hits Hogan with it in one of the worst chair shots I’ve ever seen. Not because of how Andre swung but Hogan just looks awful taking it.

Someone with Hogan swinging first it’s a double DQ and both men are eliminated, meaning the winner of DiBiase and Muraco is in the finals. Hogan hits a running chair shot to knock Andre down then chases off Virgil and DiBiase before going back to slam Andre and pose.

Rating: C. These two getting together is always awesome and the faster pace made it a lot better this time. That being said, the match wasn’t much at all. Andre was DONE at this point and everyone knew it. He was trying though so I’ll give him a ton of credit for that. The ending was the only real way to get rid of both of them to set up a new champion so that’s fine too. Just not long enough to be a great match though.

Randy Savage says good things about Hogan but says one of the Mega Powers will win the title.

Second Round Match: Ted DiBiase vs. Don Muraco

Winner goes to the finals. Muraco tries hard here but absolutely no one thinks he has a chance in this match. This is one of those matches that you could easily have cut out and no one would have really cared at all. It’s ok and Muraco used to be awesome. The problem is that now he’s nothing special at all and everyone knows it.

DiBiase gets dominated early on but catches Muraco in the corner with a slingshot kind of move to break the momentum. Matches like this show me just how good DiBiase is in the ring. He’s simply a master out there. His bumping is just amazing. I wish he would have gotten a run with the title around this time as he certainly was at the top of his game as a heel.

I’m still trying to figure out why this match is getting PPV time. Do we need five minutes for this match? It’s Don Muraco for crying out loud. Muraco charges at him but is picked up and lands a great stun gun to get the three count. Good finish.

Rating: C+. As short as it was I liked this match. It showed what DiBiase could do when he was on his own and that he really was indeed a solid wrestler. Muraco is a great foil for him as he’s trying hard but is just outmatched. Fun little match all around and very few if any mistakes in it. Really liked it.

Mr. Fuji and Demolition don’t like Uecker or Strike Force. Demolition was just awesome in all regards. Their promos were no exceptions at all.

The Fink reminds us that because Snake and Rude went to a draw that the Gang is in the semifinals already.

Second Round Match: Greg Valentine vs. Randy Savage

Same idea here as in Steamboat and Valentine. Do you really expect a bad match from these two? The battle of the elbows begins and it’s pretty solid the whole way though. There’s almost no wasted movement in this match which is just awesome. As expected, it’s all Valentine to start.

Hammer was a guy that could have been a lot better and something really special if not for the whole Hogan changes wrestling forever deal. He was that good back in the day and a world title contender. Time passed him by though and it showed badly.

He works over all of Savage without much of an emphasis on the knee. Valentine was the resident Figure Four dude at this time so it would make sense for him to go after. I guess that’s why he’s going to lose here.

Savage just starts going off on him from out of nowhere which is just kind of cool for some reason. It’s finally broken up when Savage goes for an axe handle from the top and gets punched in the stomach. Savage reverses the figure four into a small package even with Valentine’s should clearly up.

Rating: C+. Seriously, what did you expect here? Of course it’s a solid match. Fast paced with a good ending means a good grade. It was a bit too short to get anything going but they tried at least. Savage would obviously go onto bigger things but Valentine’s career had pretty much peaked by this point.

Vanna White is back again. She’s still annoying.

Intercontinental Title: Brutus Beefcake vs. Honky Tonk Man

Standard Honky Tonk match with him just getting beaten to death as the face looks like there’s no way he can lose. Here’s a few reasons why Honky is miles ahead of Santino. The commentators talk about how he’s the luckiest wrestler alive. He also gets some offense in. A big reason is because Santino tries to be funny. Honky tries to be serious and comes off as funny. Subtle, yet a key difference that made Honky better.

Finally, Honky had a signature move that won him matches. Honky was just much more believable as IC champion and this is a prime example of it. Brutus runs Honky around to start and nothing comes out of it. Jimmy gets involved and Honky takes over. His offense was shall we say limited? This goes on for far longer than it’s possible to stay interested for. Gorilla and Jesse crack jokes to fight the boredom.

Brutus puts on the sleeper but Hart hits the ref with the megaphone. Peggy Sue, Honky’s girlfriend (played amazingly by Sherri Martel) pours water on Honky to wake him up after Brutus chases Jimmy Hart under the ring and is seriously looks as if he’s trying to rape Hart. Just a bad image. He pins him down to the stairs and cuts his hair. Honky wakes up and runs with Hart.

Rating: D+. Decent match, but standard for Honky. He never really got away from that one formula of his which is kind of good actually. It worked, so why change it? When you blow the roof off the Garden like they did when he finally lost the title you must be doing something right. Match was nothing you wouldn’t expect from a Honky IC Title defense.

In for some reason one of the most famous promos of all time, Andre runs into Bob Uecker and reveals that DiBiase’s master plan centered around Andre eliminating Hogan. Uecker tries to mention something and Andre chokes him in what I believe was an unplanned spot.

Islanders and Heenan against Koko B. Ware and the British Bulldogs

Backstory-the Islanders had dog napped Matilda a few weeks ago for no good reason. This is the Bulldogs’ chance to get revenge. Koko is there because they needed a third face that could fill up a spot. Heenan comes out in an attack dog handler’s outfit which looks like an untied straight jacket. Cool idea actually.

This is more or less seven and a half minutes of this: the heels beat down a face, Heenan gets in like two kicks, the face gets up because Heenan only got in like two kicks, Heenan runs and tags out, we repeat that.

Pretty bland match here that is a filler. Heenan does a little but nothing of significance. Islanders launch Heenan into the air to slam him down onto Koko for the pin. Exact same thing they did last year with the Bulldogs.

Rating: D+. Filler that was the same match that happened in the previous year’s six man. Did they really think that little of the Bulldogs? Can you tell I’m getting bored with this show? This is another great example of a match that had no business being on this show. It wasn’t any good anyway and the dog did nothing between the beginning and ending.

Jesse Ventura poses for the crowd. DiBiase is announced as having a bye into the finals.

Semi-Final Match: Randy Savage vs. One Man Gang

You know the drill by now. Savage gets beaten up, comes back, gets beaten up a little more, Slick throws in the cane, ref sees it, DQ.

Rating: D. This match was more or less nothing. We knew almost as soon as Hogan and Andre got eliminated what the finals would be. Why should I care about this match when there’s not even an elbow?

For some reason we see Vanna White talking about the tournament AGAIN and still no one cares.

Tag Titles: Strike Force vs. Demolition

Strike Force had been champions for six months at this point but are somehow still considered transitional champions. Demolition had been around a little over a year at this point but were just now the dominant force that they became famous for being. Martel and Smash start us off. Jesse thinks that the Boston Crab, the move that won the titles for Strike Force, won’t work on Demolition because they’re too big. The hold beat Jim Neidhart though. That’s kind of an odd statement to make Mr. Governor.

Jesse can’t tell Demolition apart. We get a big brawl seconds in and finally get back to the starters. Does that make Tito the first guy off the bench? Strike Force hits double teaming to start which causes Jesse and Gorilla to fight a bit. Tito plays Ricky Morton for a bit as the big guys pound on him.

Tito gets the forearm out of nowhere to put Axe down. Jesse says he learned that in the MFL: the Mexican Football League. I give up. Off to Martel who cleans house. He manages to get the Boston Crab on Smash who is screaming. Fuji gets up to distract the referee and drops the cane, which promptly is wrapped around Martel’s cranium. Smash crawls on top to win the titles.

Rating: C-. This was about as formula based as you could get but the pop at the end sends it over the peak a bit. Demolition looked awesome here and would go on to hold the titles for a mind blowing year and a half which is never going to be touched. Strike Force was more or less done here as they lost the rematch and Martel was out for about 8 months and he turned heel in his first match back with Santana. Nothing great here, but certainly historic.

WWF World Title: Randy Savage vs. Ted DiBiase

This was a very interesting match at the time because no one knew who was going to win it. That to me will always make a match better. From what I’ve heard the original plan was to have Hogan get to the finals with DiBiase and lose thanks to Andre, eventually getting the title back at Summerslam while Savage would win the IC title from Honky either here or at Summerslam. However, Honky refused to do it and they made this the plan. I like the first one better I think.

Anyway, Andre and DiBiase are here against Savage and Liz. Andre keeps cheating so Savage whispers to Liz and everyone knows what’s coming as for about two minutes no one is watching the ring. This is about as simple of an explanation as you could ask for regarding the problems that would plague Savage’s reign.

What possible reason do we need Hogan out there for? Rather than having him out there and taking part of the spotlight, why not have Savage make the Superman comeback and get the title on a rollup when Andre can’t make the save? Instead we have Hogan coming out there, making himself the focus or at least half of it. This right away makes Savage look like a weak champion because Hogan made the save and Savage would have lost without him.

This is the kind of stuff that Savage would be paranoid about and have big delusions over over time. They’re proven right as Hogan comes through the curtain to even the odds. Savage looks dead in the ring which is what he’s supposed to do. The fans are all looking at him now because he’s the new thing they see out there. Anyway, DiBiase mostly destroys Savage with nothing too special as Savage is just dead.

Great false finish as Savage goes for the elbow and the place goes nuts but he misses it. Million Dollar Dream and Savage tries to get to the ropes but Andre pulls it back. Ref warns him and Hogan comes in and nails DiBiase with a chair leading to the elbow and a new champion! Post match sees something very interesting as Hogan, Savage and Liz celebrate. For those that can read lips, you can see Savage say to Hogan, “Please let me have my moment.” Hogan doesn’t leave, and that my friends, started the real life feud between these two.

Rating: B. We had seen these guys WAY too much tonight which is the problem with tournaments. We just get sick of these guys. Savage had 4 matches at this show. He’s one of the best ever but four times in a show is just too much.

Overall Rating: D+. The big problem is how predictable it is once Andre and Hogan are gone. After that you knew it would be Savage or DiBiase. Overall, this Mania is just too long. Ringing in at about 4 hours, there just isn’t enough here to warrant such a time. Savage winning was indeed mind blowing at the time and this show sets up a year’s worth of feuds including the first ever Summerslam where Hogan and Savage faced DiBiase and Andre.

The main issue here is that there were sixteen matches on this. Think about that for a minute. SIXTEEN MATCHES. That’s the vast problem here. Did we really need to see guys like Muraco and Bravo in the tournament? Or did we need to have the six man? This show really could have used 30-60 minutes cut out of it and then it would have been far more watchable.

The other thing this leads to is Hogan and Savage trying to share the spotlight as the Mega Powers which ultimately leads to their split and the main event of next year’s Wrestlemania. Other than that, not a lot really comes out of this show. It’s a decent PPV if you want to see just about every 80s wrestler alive perform but if you’re looking for solid matches, just watch a handful of them or you’ll be asleep by the middle of the show.




History of Wrestlemania with KB – Wrestlemania 3: The First Real Mania

Wrestlemania 3
Date: March 29, 1987
Location: Pontiac Silverdome, Pontiac (Detroit), Michigan
Attendance: 93,173
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Jesse Ventura
America The Beautiful: Aretha Franklin

Now we hit the big time. This is the first time when Wrestlemania was built up as the mega event and also it’s the first time we get a few Mania traditions. For one thing, it’s the first time we get the huge main event. While the tag match and Hogan/Bundy were big matches, to say they were nothing compared to Hulk Hogan vs. Andre the Giant is the understatement of the century.

It was also the first time we had a Mania that featured a really big midcard match in the form of what might be the greatest wrestling match of all time. There was far more backstory to these matches this time which is always a good thing as it causes far less filler. It can easily be argued that this right here is the true birth of Wrestlemania as we know it.

Can-Am Connection vs. Bob Orton/Don Muraco

That being said, let’s get to the first contest! Shockingly enough, it’s kind of a filler, but at the same time it really doesn’t feel like one. We have the short lived tag team known as the Can-Am Connection (Tom “Z-Man” Zenk and Rick Martel) against Bob Orton and Don Muraco, managed by Mr. Fuji. Now the CAC was an interesting team. They were kind of the Rockers before the Rockers.

Both were young, in shape, handsome, and fast paced workers. They were in line to be the face challengers to the Hart Foundation but Zenk left after a strange argument that we’re still unclear on and Martel was paired up with Tito Santana to form one of my all time favorite tag teams in Strike Force, who went on to beat the Harts for the belts.

But anyway onto the match. Yet again, about as basic a tag match as you can get with speed against power and that’s a combination that rarely fails. This is tag team wrestling 101 and it’s done about as well as you could ask for in a situation like this.

CAC plays the role of the young kids that aren’t that experienced against two veterans getting their first shot on the big stage to perfection. Orton gets his arm worked on and completely no sells it less than a minute later which just made me shake my head. This match boarders on a squash as the CAC are really never in trouble at all and win with a cross body on Muraco.

Rating: B+. The lack of selling by Orton and the absolute dominance by the CAC keep this from being a great match but for a warm up match for Wrestlemania that was designed to get the crowd into the show, this was done perfectly. I think I voted for this as best Mania opener ever, which I still think isn’t a stretch.

Hercules vs. Billy Jack Haynes

Next up we have Hercules against Billy Jack Haynes in a battle of the full nelsons. Simple story here: two powerhouses that both use the full nelson. A few weeks prior to this, Haynes had offered to let Hercules put the hold on him to see if he could break it. Hercules, a heel, attacked him and knocked him out with the hold, leading to this match at Mania.

The match starts off pretty fast with some hard hitting shots. Hercules takes over and all this seems to be about is getting the full nelson on the other. It’s really just a brawl which is fine as they keep it relatively short here. It’s always fun to see two big strong guys hammering on each other. Hercules has the pin and pulls him up which leads to the comeback.

Hercules gets the hold on first but it’s not on full which lets Haynes get up. Haynes eventually gets his nelson on but Hercules launches both of them to the floor where Haynes gets the hold again but we get a double count out. Haynes chases Heenan and Hercules blasts Haynes with the chain and Haynes is busted open really deep sending blood everywhere.

Rating: C-. Decent match between two brawlers that was given the right amount of time. It wasn’t supposed to be a classic and it wasn’t. This match was all about a single hold and that’s what ended the match. Went as well as it could have so it gets a decent grade.

King Kong Bundy/Lord Littlebrook/Little Tokyo vs. Hillbilly Jim/Little Beaver/Haiti Kid

There’s little story to this if any and why midget wrestlers are involved is beyond me. Bob Uecker is on commentary which is good as he’s fairly funny for someone that has no wrestling experience. The rules are simple here: big vs. big and small vs. small.

This match if nothing else proves that Bundy against Hogan was thrown together because there was nothing left. He goes from main eventing Wrestlemania to this? WOW. This is pretty short with the midgets doing most of the work. I get the idea here is that they’re supposed to be professionals and interesting but how can you argue that they’re anything but a novelty?

They go back and forth with Uecker giving some funny commentary. I’m not a fan of these kind of matches at all. They fill time here which isn’t saying much until Bundy is tagged in. Hillbilly gets beaten down by him and then Bundy slams and elbows one of the midgets causing a DQ. Hillbilly carries him to the back in what is a far cry from Superman carrying Supergirl but I’ll take what I can get I guess.

Rating: F. Seriously, what were they thinking here? This match managed to get a few minutes on the biggest show of all time. I guess you could call this the final remnant of the old days when midget matches were popular, but I’m still not getting the point of this. Nothing match and a total filler if there ever was one. And again, how did Bundy fall so far in a year?

Elizabeth Promo. This doesn’t happen as Macho comes in and says he’ll answer any questions the interviewer has. The interview never happens as Macho sends Liz away.

Junkyard Dog vs. Harley Race

Limited story here. Race was the King of the WWF at the time and on a SNME he had faced the JYD. JYD had said he wouldn’t bow to anyone and after Race had knocked him down he tried to force JYD’s head down to bow. The loser here has to bow to the winner. Race stalls like the true old school master that he is. Heenan gets involved and there goes Dog after him.

Naturally this fails him completely but since Dog has a very hard head most of Race’s shots have little to no effect. Race goes for a headbutt on the floor and Dog moves so Race rams his face into the floor. That can’t be nice at all. Gorilla and Jesse argue about managers which is always entertaining. You could tell there was a lot of respect between them.

Abdominal stretch goes on and Gorilla of course complains about it. Did he ever not complain about that hold? Race goes for a headbutt and nearly knocks himself unconscious in the process. Nice job there champ. On all fours now, which Gorilla says is Dog’s favorite position. Heenan gets up on the apron and allows Race to recover and catch a belly to belly to win it.

Rating: D+. Nothing special at all here as it was another four minute match. The right guy won though as Race was far better as far as wrestling talent went but it was surprising to see a guy like Dog, who was very popular, losing like this mostly clean. This was fine I guess.

Post match Dog bows but then pops Race with the chair and steals the crown and robe like a true jerk.

We hear from Hulk Hogan in one of the best cocaine induced promos ever. Seriously, if anyone believes that these Hogan promos aren’t drug induced then they’re far beyond what I can help. Hulk apparently thinks today is a big deal.

Rougeau Brothers vs. The Dream Team

Before we get a really weird promo from Johnny V and Dino Bravo on the Rougeaus. Johnny V is nuts but I like him. On with the match. The Dream Team is Greg Valentine and Brutus Beefcake if you were wondering. The key to this match is the Dream Team arguing for the entire match for no good reason.

Brutus tried to break up a sleeper but hit Valentine by mistake. Rougeaus hit their finisher but Bravo comes in, hits one of them and puts Valentine on Rougeau. The other three then leave Brutus in the ring, signaling the start of his face turn that lasted until 1994.

Rating: D+. Didn’t do much as it was more for the angle than the match obviously. Not a bad match at all, but nothing mind blowing. This was another way too quick match that I couldn’t get into due to simply being too short. Also the Dream Team is worthy of a major blowoff like this? Really? Pretty weak little match but technically pretty ok.

Adrian Adonis vs. Roddy Piper

Now we get to another of the famous matches here in Roddy Piper’s retirement match which has become a running joke in wrestling. The idea is that Piper went down with an injury and when he came back, Adonis had taken over Piper’s Pit and turned it into the Flower Shop.

They beat on each other for awhile until Piper thought he was an actor because of They Live so he decided to retire. Since then he’s wrestled on and off for over 20 years. A key to this match is both men use the sleeper hold as their finisher. The loser is going to get a haircut apparently.

Adrian is in his most famous gimmick here so Piper, being the MAN’S MAN that he is, hated him. There was a lot more homophobia in wrestling back then, at least in kayfabe. Well not really as any character like that is treated oddly. Those ring carts are still sweet stuff. Adonis says he’ll win. Piper busts out a belt and wipes out Adrian with it before taking a few shots of his own.

Hart gets involved a few times as this is little more than a comedy match for the most part. He finally gets something right though as he pulls Piper’s leg to give Adonis the advantage. Piper gets sent into the table and it’s all Adonis here. Back in the ring now with Piper saying bring it on.

Jimmy sprays perfume in Piper’s eyes and Adrian gets Good Night Irene, his sleeper finisher, and Piper goes down fast. He drops twice but Adrian lets go before the third drop, thinking he’s won. Brutus Beefcake runs down to wake Piper up (Adrian had accidentally cut Beefcake’s hair recently so it makes sense) and Piper gets his own sleeper to end this.

Rating: C+. It’s a standard Piper match which is always fun. This was just a comedy match but at the end of the day piper’s career was never about what he did in the ring so how can I really complain here? This was no classic or anything but it was fine and the fans cheered a lot because of it. PIper didn’t wrestle again for over two years so Piper lived up to his word for a good while at least.

Post match Beefcake cuts Adonis’ hair. A fan runs in as he leaves.

Hart Foundation/Danny Davis vs. Tito Santana/British Bulldogs

This match is pretty much all backstory. Danny Davis used to be a referee but he would cheat for the heels. He cheated Tito out of the IC Title and gave it to Macho Man and cheated the Bulldogs out of the tag titles and handed them to the Harts. He was banned “for life plus ten years”, which lasted about a year or so and he was back again as a referee. The idea here is that he’s completely inept at wrestling and all of his opponents want to kill him and Jimmy Hart, including the Bulldogs’ bulldog Matilda.

Davis will run in and kick someone maybe twice and then bail, more or less making this a 3 on 2 handicap. Hearing the commentators sing Bret’s praises is nothing but amazing as his singles push wasn’t coming for at least another year and a half and his real singles push was almost 3 years away. The kid really had talent and you can see it here.

Before the match Jesse went down to ringside to be introduced to the crowd so we have Gorilla, Bob Uecker and the host of Entertainment Tonight so the commentary is just bad right now. Uecker has some good one liners but the woman is just mindblowingly annoying. Davis misses a splash letting Tito get tagged in and he nearly kills Davis. The faces alternate with just beating the living tar out of him including a tombstone from Davey which was just odd to see for some reason.

The ending of the match was just awful though. Davis gets the stripes beaten off of him taking all three of the faces’ finishers with the last being the powerslam. Bret breaks up the pin, and less than 10 seconds after getting powerslammed, Davis gets the megaphone tossed to him and drills Davey with it for the pin.

Rating: C. The ending was just horrible to me as Davis, a referee, no sells a tombstone, the forearm and the powerslam? With guys like the Bulldogs, Santana and Hart in there, this should have been great. At best it was ok and the ending lost that for them.

Heenan and Andre do a promo here with Andre looking absolutely creepy by not moving an inch. Weirdest part of this interview: Heenan is at least 4 inches taller than Okerlund.

Butch Reed vs. Koko B. Ware

Remember how I said there was less filler on this show? This is some of that filler. There’s no reason at all here for this match other than to let Reed get a squash here and then the post match attack. The best part of the pre match stuff is a shot of Jesse and Gorilla in the broadcast booth which is at least a few hundred feet away from the ring with Jesse showing off his Wrestlemania 3 t-shirt.

As he shows it off he starts showing off his bicep and the way he talks about it is just funny. Anyway, on with this waste of time. If there has ever been a match of a weird combination this is it. Koko is the epitome of a jobber. What did he ever win in his whole career? Reed on the other hand is a great example of someone that had it all but never could put it together. He was even lined up to be a member of the Horsemen.

He had the look, the name, the power, everything you could want but he never could put it all together and I’ve never been sure why. Anyway, this is a pretty bland match as Reed reverses a bad cross body and uses the tights to win. After the match Slick beats up Koko with the cane until Tito runs out and beats up Slick for some reason and rips up his suit.

Rating: N/A. This match was a bad squash. It had no point and the match was just boring. Easily the worst match on the show.

Savage rants about how he’s going to end this tonight.

Steamboat says the Dragon is going to scorch Savage’s back.

Intercontinental Title: Randy Savage vs. Ricky Steamboat

I think I now know why the previous match was in the place it was. There’s nothing I can really say about this match that hasn’t already been said. In case you don’t know the backstory, here it is. About 3 months before Savage had been defending the title against Steamboat and during the match had put Steamboat’s throat over the guard rail, went up top and landed a double axe handle, driving him throat first into the rail.

Steamboat had a crushed larynx and allegedly his career was over. Savage had a match on Superstars and Steamboat’s music hit and the crowd went insane. Epic staredown ensues and the match was made for Mania. Between then and Mania, George Steele kidnaps Liz to continue their year long feud so Steele was in Steamboat’s corner.

Savage can’t keep up with him to start and Steamboat dominates with armdrags and then a big old choke. Steamboat works the arm and Savage is in trouble early. Savage throws him to the floor though and now it’s Ricky in trouble. Very nice back and forth stuff to start. Savage goes for the throat which is the part of Steamboat that he hurt earlier so there’s your reasoning.

They keep going back and forth with Steamboat hammering away to get Savage caught in the ropes. They’re moving rather fast out there and Dragon keeps throwing out that armdrag. Ton of near falls in a row for both guys. Dragon Skins the Cat but gets knocked back to the floor. Savage hits a knee to the back of Steamboat to send him over the table and into the crowd.

Jesse yells at Gorilla for saying Steele helping Steamboat back in is cheating and calls Gorilla out of being hypocritical when another heel manager helped his guy back in early. Double axe to the back of the head of Steamboat on the floor and the count is on. Gorilla wants Savage disqualified for some weird clothesline thing. That was odd.

Savage gets a gutwrench suplex for two. Here comes Steamboat again though and he sends Savage over the top with a beautiful bump to the floor. He jumps OVER the referee to hit a big chop on Savage for two. They crank it up again for more near falls all over the place. Savage eats post on a slingshot and that only gets two. He manages to grab Steamboat and send him into the post shoulder first.

And there goes the referee. Savage gets the elbow but there’s no referee for the count. Randy goes out to get his trust bell but Steele shoves him off the top and his head cracks into the bell. Both guys are down though. Savage picks him up and in the famous ending, Steamboat rolls through into a small package for the pin and the title to blow the roof off the place.

Rating: A+. As I said before, likely the greatest match of all time. Nothing but an A+ the whole way with these two beating the living heck out of each other and never slowing down a bit. Apparently all of these spots were planned out months in advance in Savage’s house in Florida which worked very well as there are zero bad spots here that I can think of. Excellent match and something everyone should see at least once if not more than once.

Jake Roberts vs. The Honky Tonk Man

This all started on Jake’s interview segment the Snake Pit where Honky hit him with a real guitar. See today, the guitars Jeff Jarrett uses are fake. They’re made to explode the way they do. The one Honky used was a real one and didn’t break.

Some of the material legitimately got stuck in Jake’s neck and allegedly that’s what got him addicted to alcohol and drugs to alleviate the pain. Believe that if you want to. Anyway, that more or less started Jake’s face turn and for God knows what reason, rocker Alice Cooper is in Jake’s corner. Also factor in that Jimmy Hart is deathly afraid of snakes.

There’s really not much here. It’s about 7 minutes long so it gets some time but Honky really hadn’t established the character that made him legendary yet, so this isn’t what you’d expect. It’s a very slow paced match that was I think designed to give the people a breather after the IC Title match. They go back and forth for awhile but Jake goes for the DDT and Jimmy grabs his foot. Honky rolls him up and grabs the rope for the pin. After the match, Jake and Alice torment Jimmy with the snake to end things.

Rating: C. It’s nothing special and is little more than a breather for the fans between the two mega matches. This was allegedly a double turn according to some people but that is just stupid as both guys already were in their more famous roles. This was a pretty ok match but dude, they’re following Savage vs. Steamboat. Like anyone cares about what happened here.

We get Gene Okerlund to announce the world attendance record of 93,173. No matter what you think of the show, that’s freaking amazing. This also gets you the beginning of the long running joke with Jesse and Gorilla of Jesse wondering whether or not he and Gorilla are counted in that.

Iron Sheik and Nikolai Volkoff vs. Killer Bees

More or less the same review of the previous match but in tag team version. This is another filler to bridge the gap between the two big matches. As Volkoff is singing, Jim Duggan runs out with the 2×4 and stops the song. This is a really dull match with the Bees using fast moves against both big guys but eventually getting caught.

Duggan is on the floor playing cheerleader throughout the whole thing. Duggan starts chasing Volkoff for some reason while Sheik has one of the Bees in the camel clutch. They go into the ring and Duggan looks at Sheik and for no reason at all, blasts him over the back with the board. Even the commentators are at a loss for why he hit him. It just made absolutely no sense at all.

Rating: D. This match was boring and the ending made less sense than an Iron Sheik promo. Again this was just filler and a way to get the crowd all fired up for that whole biggest match of all time thing coming after it. There was very little thought in this one as the buildup was weak on Superstars. All that being said though as I said in the previous rating, dude they’re right before Hogan vs. Andre.

World Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Andre the Giant

This match has been called the biggest match in the history of professional wrestling and that very well may be true. It was the first true super main event in Wrestlemania history. Here’s the story: Hogan and Andre used to be friends and even tag partners. They celebrated together when Hogan won the belt over 3 years ago. Hogan ran in to save Andre a few times from being beaten up by Bundy and Studd.

Fast forward a year and Hogan is being given a trophy for being World Champion for three years. Andre is given a slightly smaller trophy for not losing a match in 15 years. He looks at the trophies and just walks away. A few weeks later, they have a face to face interview on Piper’s Pit. Andre tilts Hogan’s head up at him and says “Look at me when I’m talking to you. I’m here for one reason: to challenge you for a world championship match at Wrestlemania.”

Hogan is stunned and says he can’t do it. Andre grabs Hogan’s shirt and the cross he wears and rips them off, stunning Hogan. Piper asks him if he’ll fight him and Hogan screams YES!!! You really have to understand how big this was at the time. Andre was like Taker as far as mystique goes, but 10x moreso. This would be like Hulk Hogan coming back today and challenging John Cena to a match.

Hogan cuts one of the most famous promos of his career before the match, saying that the world is going to fall at his feet after the match. Hogan always had that little hint at implying he was God in his promos but never flat out said it.

Andre comes out and the booing is mindblowing. In something that I find funny, he waves to the fans on the way down to ringside. Jesse gives the tale of the tape, which is all of Andre and Hogan’s measurements, showing that as big as Hogan is, Andre is so much bigger. Bob Uecker is the guest announcer and after introducing Andre, says three simple words: and, his opponent. After that, the fans just lose it. Hogan’s music hits and nothing else matters at all.

Gorilla puts it best by saying “The roof of the Silverdome is about to explode here!” In a great camera shot, you get a wide angle shot of the arena with the spotlight on Hogan which really shows how this whole show has been building to this one moment. Hogan gets in the ring and it’s on. I won’t go into detail here either as I’m sure you’ve all seen this at one time or another. Every word of commentary is famous here as I can almost quote the whole match to you.

Within 15 seconds, Hogan goes for a slam and we nearly get a pin. That is a point that is used for over a year as Hogan might not have gotten his shoulder up in time. The way the camera is set up you really can’t tell if he did or not. This was something that a lot of people, Hulk included, were worried about going into this match. See, today in wrestling, no one would ever change the ending to a match. In this case, Andre had agreed to lose.

The problem that Hogan had was if he did a single thing during the match to offend Andre, Andre would pin him and there wasn’t a thing Hogan could do if Andre chose to do that. That’s how big and strong Andre truly was. There wasn’t a man in wrestling that could legitimately beat him in a real fight at the time.

He easily could have turned it into a shoot and annihilated Hogan. That’s where the controversy came from: when Andre landed on Hogan, Hogan literally couldn’t kick out. Andre shifted his weight at the last second and Hogan got a shoulder up just in time, but it was so close that it looked like the match lasted 15 seconds.

The in ring work here is really pretty bad, but no one cared. This match was all about the meaning of what was going on and the truly epic nature of the match. No one really knew who was going to win here and it was a legitimate possibility that Hogan would lose. Andre more or less beats the living tar out of Hogan the whole match until the very end. Hogan gets some shots in here and there that do some damage and Andre is clearly worn out at the end of it.

The crowd is almost stunned that Hogan is being dominated. They brawl on the floor for a bit and then head back into the ring. Andre misses a boot and Hogan clotheslines him, knocking him down. The fans go insane at the sight of this. Hulk Hulks Up and he has the crowd in the palm of his hand at this point. In what might be the most mous scene in the history of wrestling, Hogan slams Andre in a completely unplanned spot.

Even the commentators are in awe at this point as Hogan drops the leg and wins the match. Andre was so bit at the time that Hogan ripped his ab muscles to pieces slamming him and was out for a few months. The music plays and Heenan and Andre get into the cart that takes them to the back as Heenan has his head in his hands, wondering what just happened. Hogan poses as we close the show with the fans absolutely going nuts.

Rating: A. The match itself is pretty bad but the historical significance is second to absolutely nothing. Now I’ve seen a lot of people (including his majesty Mr. Meltzer) say this was a horrible match and all that jazz. In short: SCREW YOU ALL. Get the sticks out of your head and have some fun for once. If you don’t get chills watching the staredown and the slam, then go watch something else.

You have Hogan and Andre who can barely move at all. What are they supposed to do out there? The entire idea here was to have a major showdown and that’s exactly what they did. THis match was epic, still is epic and will always be epic. Anyone that says this wasn’t a great match that did exactly what it was supposed to do is a fool, and i don’t care who I have to argue this with.

Overall Rating: B+. I went back and forth between B+ and A- here. This is the first truly historic Wrestlemania and the first to truly be the spectacle that is has become today. Easily the two biggest matches are the singles title matches that are still incredibly famous today. There’s far less filler than before and the matches have much more solid stories to them.

This show is more famous for its historical aspect than the in ring stuff and that’s just fine. It’s not the best Mania of all time, but it’s up there. Definite recommendation to see this if you never have, or if you just haven’t watched it in awhile, if nothing else just for the history lesson




History of Wrestlemania with KB: Wrestlemania 2 – What the Heck Were They Thinking?

Wrestlemania 2
Date: April 7, 1986
Location: Nassau Coliseum-New York, Rosemont Horizon-Chicago, Illinois, Sports Arena-Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 40,085 combined for all three venues
Commentators: New York – Vince McMahon, Susan St. James. Chicago – Gorilla Monsoon, Gene Okerlund, Cathy Lee Crosby, Ernie Ladd. Los Angeles – Jesse Ventura, Alfred Hayes, Elvira
America The Beautiful: Ray Charles

This show is the classic what the heck were thinking moment from the WWF. They had made Wrestlemania the year before and they hit it so far out of the park that by the time it was Wrestlemania 2 the ball hadn’t come down yet. This was a problem though. Since the inaugural show had been such a success, Vince felt they had to do something to top it. This was his idea: what if we did Wrestlemania from 3 different places??? Think about that for a minute. How weird would that be?

Not to mention, Vince had another idea: let’s put it on a Monday! Again, just awkward sounding. The format used was three locations, each with an undercard and then a featured match, which were a boxing match, a battle royal, and the true main event, Hulk Hogan against King Kong Bundy in a steel cage.

The idea was odd on paper and worse in reality as it felt like watching three shows instead of one. There’s no rhythm and because it was in three locations, announcers were a rare commodity. Due to this, Vince’s last idea was to put a real commentator together with celebrities to do the commentary. What followed might be the biggest mess in company history.

Paul Orndorff vs. Don Muraco

We begin the show in New York City with Paul Orndorff against Don Muraco. Why are they fighting? I don’t have a freaking clue but they are so here we go. As they begin we hear comments from both and neither have anything to say of meaning.

Orndorff is easily the face here so if he never accomplished anything else in his career, the face turn between Manias one and two was effective. As was predicted, the celebrity commentator is atrocious, with such gems like “I think he’s winning!” Orndorff controls the early part of the match but Muraco breaks it up with some power. They roll outside and we get a double count out as the crowd clearly can be heard chanting bull.

Rating: D+. Fine for what it was, but the fans got it right with their chants. This is the opening match to Wrestlemania? Seriously? That’s the best they could come up with? This feud more or less never went anywhere at all as Orndorff was about to get the biggest push of his career by far, resulting in him making about $20,000 a week for awhile. This was just an odd choice for an opening match but then again this was an odd choice for a show so I guess it fits.

Intercontinental Title: George Steele vs. Randy Savage

Next up the intercontinental title is on the line as Randy Savage defends against George Steele. This is a match that I can’t find a standalone version of so I can’t put this one in here. However, this was another chapter in the over year long feud between these two. Savage had been allegedly mistreating Liz and Steele had developed a crush on her. That led to, what else, Savage being jealous and a 15 month feud began.

Mega stall from Savage to start as he seems afraid of Steele. Savage runs again and finally on the third time Steele goes after him. They finally lock up and Steele beats Savage up for a while with power moves and biting but Steele keeps going to talk to Liz. This was a weird period for Savage as they knew they had a gem with him but they didn’t know what to do with him. Yeah he was the IC champion, but where did they go with him from there?

This was all they had until the next year when he and Steamboat stole the show and Savage was launched into the main event. For some reason Savage has a bouquet of flowers that he and Steele try to beat each other up with. After ripping apart a turnbuckle and eating the stuffing (not making that up) Steele gets slammed and elbowed, but he kicks out?

Yes, George Steele is the first man to kick out of the elbow, and he pops up, beats on Savage some more and then gets rolled up and Savage uses the ropes to pin him. Steele eats more stuffing.

Rating: C-. This was a comedy match I think with wrestling mixed in. Savage is the highlight here as he sells like crazy for Steele and it helps a lot. These two had this freaky chemistry that no one has ever been able to really figure out. They would feud on and off for the next year before FINALLY ending it with the return of Ricky Steamboat for that whole greatest match of all time thing he and Savage would have next year.

Jake Roberts vs. George Wells

We follow up that strange match with another somewhat strange match as Jake Roberts, still a rookie here, takes on some guy named George Wells. This match is little more than a glorified squash. Wells dominates early but doesn’t go for a pin when he has the chance. Jake recovers and DDTs him to win the match. Afterwards he unleashes Damien who causes Wells to look like he’s foaming at the mouth.

Rating: D+. Talk about a weird choice to have on Wrestlemania. Jake was brand new at this point so they needed someone to make him look good and they pick….George Wells? There was a squash on Mania for the first two years and both times they were the least interesting match on the card. I don’t get the selection here for the most part and it’s pretty bad all things considered.

Boxing Match: Mr. T vs. Roddy Piper

We now move onto the main event of the New York portion of the show: a boxing match with Roddy Piper and Mr. T. This was built up on SNME about 2 months before hand with Mr. T. beating Piper’s friend Bob Orton in a boxing match before being beaten down by both of them. That came on from what started over a year ago in the main event of the first Wrestlemania, so this truly was a showdown that had been built up for ages.

Factor in that T had been the World Boxing Champion in Rocky 3 just a few years ago and was on a top rated TV show where he was a tough guy. Both men have famous trainers in their corners to make it look more legit.  For no apparent reason Joan Rivers does the ring announcing.  This is ten three minute rounds.  She introduces Orton as the Ace Comedy Bob Orvin.  Nice job of handling the reading thing honey.

They actually got Smoking Joe Frazier to be in T’s corner.  One of the biggest stars in Hollywood has in his corner a former world heavyweight champion who had three of the best boxing matches in history with Muhammad Ali.  He also has a midget.  Well of course he does.  They treat this like a real boxing match.  Oh dear.

T goes for the ribs which doesn’t work all that well for him.  Piper hits him on the break which is illegal of course.  There has been no mention of judges or anything like that so I guess this is destined to not go the distance.  The referee has broken them up about four times now.  I think these are three minute rounds.  For the most part these punches aren’t landing at all but they sell them anyway of course.

It’s not so much boxing but rather glorified grappling with the occasional punch thrown.  The fans are more or less dead if you didn’t guess that.  After the first round nothing has really happened.  Piper has a bunch of grease on his face for the second round which is keeping the punches from T from being effective.

This is painfully boring if I didn’t make that clear so far.  Piper knocks the heck out of T with some big roundhouses and finally drops him to huge cheers because something HAPPENED for a change.  The knockdown gets a count of 8.  Piper keeps pounding on him as round two ends.  They brawl a bit during the break and Orton throws water at T.

Piper does the Ali Shuffle to start the third round.  T gets him into the corner and pounds away with more or less open hand shots to the head and Piper is in trouble.  That gets a count of 7.  T gets a huge punch that I think hit so of course Piper is knocked to the floor.  He gets up at 9 and then holds onto T for the last 25 seconds of the fight.

They just trade big bombs to start the fourth round.  And then he punches the referee and slams T for the DQ about a minute into the fourth round.  It’s a bit brawl and T of course gets the win.  Was there a reason for both that ending and also having Piper dominate a round like that?  This was awful.

Rating: F. On WRESTLEmania they had a long boxing match.  This was just boring beyond belief and the boxing looked awful.  They tried to make this seem legit and it failed on more than all levels.  T was never seen again and Piper turned face relatively soon after taking time off for knee surgery.  Boring match and awful beyond belief.

Chicago

Women’s Title: Fabulous Moolah vs. Velvet McIntyre

We start with the Women’s Title on the line as Moolah defends against Velvet McIntyre. This match is just weird. Moolah dominates, Velvet comes back and then misses a splash allowing Moolah to pin her. It screams botched finish to me as even the announcers seem surprised.

Rating: N/A. Just was nothing at all and might have gone a minute. Little to rate here so I won’t even try to.

Nikolai Volkoff vs. Corporal Kirschner

Now we have a flag match with Nikolai Volkoff against the forgotten Corporal Kirschner. Yeah I don’t remember him either. The winner gets to have their flag waved. Other than that it’s a standard one on one match. As usual, Nikolai sings the Russian National Anthem before the match starts. Nikolai dominates early on, ramming Kirschner into the post twice and busting him open. I kid you not, Kirschner lands 7 right hands, catches Freddy Blassie’s cane and hits Nikolai with it to win the match.

Rating: D-. This was supposed to be a brawl but it was a bad match. 7 punches and a cane shot? Give me a break. Kirschner is apparently one of the most legit tough guys in the history of the business and got thrown out of most major companies for being too rough. Based on this and his match at the Wrestling Classic I’d assume it’s due to a high level of suck but that’s just me. This was just barely long enough to warrant a rating and it wasn’t any good at all.

Battle Royal

Now we get the most famous match from this show: a 20 man battle royal with ten pro football players and 10 wrestlers. This is going to go GREAT. Since most of you won’t know half the people in this I’m not going to list them all until the end. The big names are a still rookie Bret Hart, Andre the Giant, Big John Studd and Bruno Sammartino. For the most part this is a run of the mill battle royal.

It’s little more than a bunch of punching and kicking against the ropes as we get down to the big names. Oddly enough the celebrity commentator is the only one that gets anything right. Gorilla says stuff like Studd has this guy in the corner when they’re almost in the middle of the ring, or Ernie Ladd who was a wrestler saying no one wants Andre when he’s beating someone up. Amazing.

The only really famous thing in this match is a football player named William the Refrigerator Perry getting eliminated by Studd but then offering a handshake and eliminating him. The Iron Sheik eliminates Hillbilly Jim just as he would in the gimmick battle royal 15 years later at WM 17. The final four are the Hart Foundation, a football player and Andre. Do I need to really give the details on this? Andre beats up the Harts to win the match after launching Bret out in a press slam.

Rating: B. It’s a bunch of football players and 80s wrestlers with a few great workers. Nothing special, but considering what they had to work with this is just fine. The football stuff didn’t lead anywhere which is kind of surprising as they set up a Fridge vs. Studd thing that never happened at all that I know of. This was just ok and at least the right guy won it. Andre would of course be in the biggest match of all time the next year.

Tag Titles: British Bulldogs vs. The Dream Team

Now we have what is likely the best match of the whole show. It’s a classic 80s tag match with the British Bulldogs, and Ozzy Osbourne in their corner for God alone knows why to face the tag team champions of the Dream Team Brutus Beefcake and Greg Valentine. You can tell they’re serious here as this has a sixty minute time limit.

The ring looks small here for some reason.  Gorilla asks why Ozzy is there too which means he’s confused like I am.  There are two referees here which I doubt will mean anything for the most part.  Smith vs. Valentine to get up.  The ring is all loud here still.

The Bulldogs were so fast with those tags and this is no exception at all.  Valentine won’t tag out for no apparent reason.  He counters a backdrop though and here’s Beefcake.  Small package by Dynamite get two.  Fisherman’s suplex by Davey gets two.  I guess he’s not perfect.  After Davey gets beaten on for a bit Dynamite comes in and slugs it out with Valentine.

The champions cheat a bit and they still can’t take over.  I never got the appeal of the Dream Team but to be fair it might be that Brutus was just awful at this point.  Valentine gets a Piledriver on Dynamite but falls forward so it kind of looks like a tombstone but with Dynamite’s stomach facing out.  That was kind of cool looking.

Bulldogs clear the ring as things speed up a bit.  Davey gets the powerslam for two as it wasn’t a finisher but just a signature move at the time.  The champions work over Davey as momentum changes hands a lot here tonight.  They work over the arm, including with a shoulderbreaker from Valentine.

However he shows his idiocy by pulling Davey up at two.  Nice job you lunkhead.  And there’s the idiocy coming through as for no apparent reason Dynamite gets on the middle rope and Davey rams Valentine’s head into Kid’s for the knockout shot and falls on Valentine for the pin and the titles.  That ending came from NOWHERE and Dynamite is out cold from the shot which is kind of amusing for some reason.  That’s Albano’s 16th title win as a manager.  Hokey smoke.

Rating: B-. Fun stuff but the ending was just so freaking random.  I don’t get the ending as it was like they looked at the clock and realized they had no time left and were like oh crap we need to finish this.  The Bulldogs were a good team and were a huge step up from the Dream Team.  They would lose them to the Harts in about 8-9 months so the tag division was starting to roll at this point.

Los Angeles

Ricky Steamboat vs. Hercules Hernandez

We move to the final and by far the worst of the three locations as we’re now in LA, beginning with Ricky Steamboat against Hercules Hernandez. This was supposed to be Bret vs. Ricky in the big showdown match for Mania. I’m not sure what the showdown would be for since for all intents and purposes they had no feud that I know of but a little face on face action never hurt anyone, even though Bret wasn’t a face at the time so scratch that line.

They start off kind of fast but not fast enough for anything to mean much. This was a different era so matches like these were really commonplace. There’s no feud or anything here and Hercules is just a big power guy that had been given a fairly decent push so he’s getting to fight one of the best guys in the company at one of the biggest shows of the year.

There is almost nothing to say here though as I’ve been watching for a few minutes and nothing has happened at all. Well at least nothing worth talking about that is. Hercules goes for the backbreaker as this is before the Full Nelson made him the original Chris Masters. Relatively standard Steamboat match which means it’s at least passable. Herc is the big powerhouse that beats the tar out of Ricky, makes one mistake and the Dragon makes his comeback. The flying body press ends things as always.

Rating: C-. And that’s almost all for Steamboat. I liked Hercules for some reason but for the life of me I don’t get the point in having him be considered a better prospect than Bret was. This was the epitome of a throwaway match with nothing special at all going on in it and nothing of note to talk about really. I sat there for minutes at a time with nothing of note so I apologize for the most history based match here.

Adrian Adonis vs. Uncle Elmer

Now for the odd match of the night, we have Adrian Adonis, playing a controversial gay gimmick at the time, against Uncle Elmer, a fat hillbilly character. The crowd chants a certain homosexual slur at Adonis to start the match which he prances around the ring to.

This match is slow and mostly painful as the smaller man in the match weighs about 350lbs. When he’s your agile guy, you know this isn’t going anywhere. Elmer punches him and literally falls off his feet from it. Quite sad actually. Adonis has his dress, yes dress ripped off and it’s just hideous. Elmer beats on him some more but misses a leg drop. Adonis hits a top rope headbutt and gets the pin.

Rating: N/A. I never got the appeal of either of these characters and thankfully Elmer wasn’t around much longer. Naturally he got a tape mainly about him and his family because that’s the way the 80s went.

Junkyard Dog/Tito Santana vs. The Funks

In the next to last match of the night, we have the Funks against JYD and Tito Santana. This is another filler match that had no point at all other than two faces against a heel team. This is a much slower paced match as they do more old school stuff in there. Terry vs. Tito starts us off so we’re certainly getting things started off on the right foot here.

You have three guys that belong in the Hall of Fame and JYD who is in there because he was popular in the 80s making him a LEGEND. I still don’t like him but he’s more bearable than some people I can’t stand. This is definitely a different style than most are used to. I’d like a bit more explanation as to why they’re fighting but I think It’s 1986 is about as close as we’re going to get. Tito dominates for the most part here, hammering away on both Funks. He was completely awesome at this point if you didn’t get that.

Off to the Dog now and we get some boxing. A Texas man lost a fight to a dog. Don’t bother going back to Amarillo I guess Terry. Someone please explain the appeal to me of the Dog as I just don’t get it at all and never have. Dory plays Ricky Morton which just sounds wrong and gets beaten on in the corner for a bit. The forearm gets two as I guess Tito didn’t have it perfected yet.

Control shifts over to the crazy men and they beat down Tito for awhile as he’s really playing Ricky Morton. That still sounds wrong. After a few minutes of basic offense from the Funks JYD comes back in and everything goes nuts. Terry is thrown to the floor where there are no mats. He might have legitimately hurt his knee or ankle there and I’m not surprised at all. With the referee not looking, Terry clocks the Dog with the Megaphone (Jimmy was managing them which I forgot to mention) and the heels steal one.

Rating: B-. Pretty fun match here with the Funks being all evil and the thrown together face team doing whatever they could to get the win. Granted that didn’t happen but at least they tried. This was a better match than I remember it being and while it’s still mainly formula stuff it worked rather well. I liked it and granted three of the guys being all time greats helps a bit.

WWF World Title: Hulk Hogan vs. King Kong Bundy

This is a cage match and the only one in Mania history if you don’t count the Cell match at Mania 15 which most people don’t. The story behind this is Bundy jumped Hogan at a SNME and hurt his ribs, which hadn’t healed yet. Hogan wrestled against doctor’s orders with tape all over his ribs. Simple but effective but kind of too simple as this was more or less thrown together about a month ago.

This is a very not surprising match with Bundy going for the ribs and Hogan having to fight through the pain. It’s solid because it’s Hogan doing what he does best but the total and complete lack of drama or anyone really caring for the most part is hurting it. Also having Jesse as lead announcer is a very odd choice.

Bundy rips the tape off of Hogan’s ribs like a good heel and Hogan messes up as always by trying to pick Bundy up and of course he can’t do it. There’s nothing special going on here at all but it’s working for the most part. Ah there’s the Hulk Up. Very surprisingly we get a power slam here and not the traditional slam. Maybe his ribs really were hurt. He ties up Bundy and goes over the top to retain and end the show.

Rating: B-. It’s Hogan against a monster heel not named Andre. What are you expecting here? This was his bread and butter and the fans popped for the end (only) so I guess you can call this a success. I’m a sucker for Hogan matches in the 80s so I’d say there’s probably some bias in the rating but who cares? Fairly solid match but nothing unique about it at all other than the cage aspect.

Overall rating: C+. While certainly better in the ring than the first Mania and including some storylines this time, the three venues thing is just a mess. There’s really only two or three very good matches here and I’d call maybe the tag title match Mania worthy. Other than that there’s a lot of filler and it’s more or less 1-2 big matches per location with the rest being all filler.

This show suffers from trying to do something that had never been done before, and while they did indeed do that the overlooked one major point: the new thing they did wasn’t a good idea. It’s really not that good of a show overall. Watch the highlights if you want to, but don’t waste three hours watching it from start to end.




Monday Nitro – September 4, 1995: Let The First Shot Be Fired!

Monday Nitro #1
Date: September 4, 1995
Location: Mall of America, Minneapolis, Minnesota
Commentators: Eric Bischoff, Steve McMichael, Bobby Heenan

So nearly three years after Raw got going, WCW woke up and realized that being on Saturday nights at 6:05 for your flagship show was freaking STUPID so they decided to go head to head with Raw by debuting Monday Nitro. Their first episode aired when Raw wasn’t on that week which really was the right thing to do when you think about it.

It’s just one hour tonight for no apparent reason, but they manage to pack a good bit in here, including a very important thing that I’ll get to later on. This is a show I’ve seen at least 5 or 6 times so I remember it being not bad. Let’s see how it was.

I always liked the intro video for Nitro as it was a street more or less blowing up with pictures of wrestlers and a great song. It really was cool and I liked it better than Raw’s for a long time. I don’t think anyone knew who McMichael was outside of Chicago, but when did that really bother WCW?

Jushin Thunder Liger vs. Brian Pillman

I can’t wait to do SuperBrawl 2 as their match there could rival Bret vs. Owen for beat PPV opener ever. Liger is just coming back from a broken leg so he might be a bit rusty, meaning he’ll be better than 95% of the wrestlers in the world. Naturally, they start off hot. This is another one of those pairings where it’s hard to mess it up. We’re two minutes in and Mongo and Heenan are already calling each other names.

This could be a really long night. Eric is pitching the company like no other which is fine here as it might be the first show for a lot of viewers. We get the surfboard which is a move that I always mark for. Bobby has a great line: “I never go surfing. I always have people do it for me.” I love that. McMichael is trying but he’s just lost out there. For the life of me I have no idea why they thought he was a good idea.

Liger gets a hurricanrana from the top rope which was a move that no one had seen for the most part. And no, the Frankensteiner doesn’t count as it’s nowhere near as fast or as crisp. These two were WAY ahead of their time out here as the Cruiserweights wouldn’t rise to prominence for over a year. Out of nowhere, Pillman hooks a rollup for the pin.

Rating: B. This is based on being the first match in the new era of the company. They set the pace for the show as they had a fast paced and exciting match. What else can you ask for from a debut match? These two simply didn’t have bad matches, which makes sense given their talent and styles.

Sting is ready for Flair.

WCW Hotline ad.

Ad for Batman Forever for the SNES. That game SUCKED. You use Down + R to use the grappling hook yet X and Y aren’t used at all. See the problem?

We come back from break to see…hang on I need a moment here. Ok I’m good. We come back to Hulk Hogan at Hulk Hogan’s Pastamania. Hulk Hogan had a pasta restaurant in the Mall of America, complete with a dish called Hulk A-Roos. You can’t make this stuff up at all. He cuts a generic promo but the kids around him are loving it. The guy was great with kids, I’ll give him that. This was one of the biggest jokes in wrestling history though, but it did show how huge and mainstream Hogan was.

US Title: Sting vs. Ric Flair

I’ll give Nitro this: they got the card spot on for the first show. You have a cruiserweight match that’s going to be awesome and was, you have this which is more or less impossible to screw up, and Hogan vs. a big man in the main event. They played things safe here and that’s all they needed to do. And now we get the defining moment for Nitro until Hall showed up: Lex Luger walks down the aisle and stares at Sting and Flair.

Now that doesn’t sound very interesting does it? The thing you have to remember, Luger had been in a WWF ring wrestling the day before. This was the first big shock and since the internet was more or less a non factor for the most part back then, this was a shocking thing. No one knew this was coming and it really did set the tone for Nitro and WCW in the future as Luger was immediately in the main event picture.

The announcers have no clue what to say to this and even though Bischoff knew it was coming, he’s playing it off well. Sting was the perfect choice to put on the show here as he had the speed, the power, the mat wrestling ability, the look, the charisma and the talking ability to be remembered really well. He didn’t have to do much as he hits his third gorilla press, but the crowd is eating it up. Why mess with what works? Make that four of them.

His strength is overlooked quite a bit. We go to a break and when we come back we have a wide shot of the Mall and it looks VERY cool. It’s a three story mall and you have all kinds of people shopping around and we just happen to have a major wrestling show going on. Arn Anderson walks out as Sting misses a splash. Arn and Flair had been having a lot of problems lately and would finally fight at Fall Brawl.

They play up the shock value to a T here about Luger and the unpredictability aspect of the show. Sting hits a top rope suplex. The announcers’ reactions: Bischoff says the ring moved two feet, McMichael says his monitor nearly fell off the table and Heenan says his monitor went black. I wish I was making this up. Flair gets the figure four but Arn comes into the ring for the DQ and he and Flair go at it.

Rating: C+. Again, this is hard to get wrong. It wasn’t one of their better ones, but it wasn’t supposed to be. It got them in front of a TV camera and showed the fans what they had coming. This was a lot like the debut of a new promotion in a lot of ways as no one really knew what to expect here.

They kind of had to restart a lot of things in the early weeks to give the people a feel for what they were all about. The match was fine and they did their regular good stuff, but this was about angles and not the match and that’s fine.

Scott Norton comes out to yell about not being on the show despite having a contract. Savage comes out to yell at him. They set up a match for next week. It’s so adorable that Norton thinks he means something outside of Japan.

Sabu is coming. Dang it.

Some guy from Alabama wins a sweepstakes. This took 10 seconds of ring time.

Ad for Saturday Night, featuring a double main event: Johnny B. Badd vs. Dick Slater and Sting and Macho vs. the Bluebloods. And people wonder why the fans were very happy Nitro debuted.

Mr. Wallstreet is coming to WCW. It was IRS going JBL’s gimmick. This went badly. He even mentions the IRS. Seriously?

WCW Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Big Bubba Rogers

Rogers is Big Boss Man’s 15th or so gimmick. We go to a commercial before Hogan’s entrance and we get a SLIM JIM AD! Oh and there’s one for Hot Pockets too. Jimmy Hart has stars and stripes pants and a jacket. He looks like a walking barber pole. The fans are going nuts for Hogan if nothing else. What are you expecting here?

It’s Hogan vs. big man 101, Like I said earlier they’re playing it very safe and that’s fine. Bubba gets in his offense and Hogan makes a comeback and slams him before the leg drop ends it in about five minutes. A clean pin on Nitro. That won’t happen that often.

Rating: C. It’s exactly that: average. There was nothing special here but it wasn’t unwatchable or anything. No one was expecting an epic showdown here as it was just Hogan defending his title in a token title defense. Nothing wrong with that.

The Dungeon of Doom which had been feuding with Hogan hit the ring and Luger makes the save. Macho and Sting show up to calm them down. This would be your main event at Fall Brawl. Sting, Hogan, Luger and Savage vs. Shark (Earthquake), Zofdiac (Beefcake) Meng and Kamala. I wonder who wins that.

We go to commercial and see an ad for the Muscular Dystrophy Association which sponsored Fall brawl for some reason. That’s just odd. There’s also an ad for the Eagles vs. Cardinals game. DAng that would have sucked.

Luger says he wants a title shot. Hogan says sure but says he’ll be champion forever and a day. I love delusions of grandeur that almost came true. They make the match for next week and that’s it.

Overall Rating: B+. For a debut show, this was great. They advanced a lot of stuff and set up next week and the future pretty well. With only an hour they did quite well but remember there was no Raw tonight. The ratings were good but they lost for a good while. The wrestling was ok and we got three kinds of matches and angles were advanced so I’d say very good job here. Things would get far worse for awhile though.




Bash at the Beach 2000: The Shoot Not Heard Around The World

Bash at the Beach 2000
Date: July 9, 2000
Location: Ocean Center, Daytona Beach, Florida
Attendance: 6,572
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Scott Hudson, Mark Madden

Ok so this is a show I get asked about a lot due to an infamous segment in it so I figured I might as well just do it once and for all. Well that and someone requested the whole show so there we are. We’re back at the birthplace of the NWO so you know they’re going to try to do something “shocking.” The main event is supposed to be Hogan vs. Jarrett but you know that’s not going to work. The company is just dead in the water at this point and they’re just waiting to be put out of their misery. Let’s get to it.

Ernest Miller who is the commissioner for the week has the guy formerly known as Ice Train, his limo driver, to prevent outside interference in the cruiserweight title match. The Jung Dragons jump him and he beats them up in a badly choreographed sequence that went absolutely nowhere. The opening video has no narration and is just clips of the main event.

Masterlock, as in the company that makes actual locks, is the sponsor. Let that sink in for a bit.

Oh and yes, it’s THAT Mark Madden on commentary.

Cruiserweight Title: Juventud Guerrera vs. Lieutenant Loco

This is Filthy Animals vs. M.I.A. We have Konnan, Disco and Madden in the same vicinity. It’s a WrestleZone reunion! Konnan is so annoying. Disco is even more annoying. Loco is more commonly known as Chavo Guerrero and is the champion but Juvy stole the belt. Oh and remember that thing where we were told there weren’t supposed to have anyone at ringside? There are only 8 of them so far. The referee throws them all out as I have no idea what these people were supposed to be. We get into an argument over what Sports Entertainment is. Oh dear.

Juvy runs early and sits on the stage pointing at his crotch. Can we like, wrestle? We have a boring chant 8 minutes into the show. Madden reminds us that the Jung Dragons, the people that jumped Miller to start the show, had made a deal with Miller on Thunder. Madden calls Juvy the Juicer-Weight Champion.

A piece of Juvy’s hair falls out while he’s in the chinlock. Madden is already on my nerves. Juvy keeps trying to run so Chavo spanks him. Chavo hits a great dive to the floor to half kill Juvy. Chavo was one of the few things that was just awesome in the dying days of WCW. He hit a groove for the last 6-7 months or so and was untouchable and it was just starting here.

The Filthy Animals come out in masks to be at ringside, making the whole order earlier completely pointless. And with no one telling them to, they leave. Tony thinks they planned this. Something to keep in mind here: you’re going to see or read about a LOT of stuff that is completely and utterly ridiculous and or stupid in this show so be prepared. Just be glad I’m not doing Raw or Thunder.

Thunder became a comedy show as they literally often edited the show wrong so it wasn’t in order, meaning there would be explanations for things that hadn’t happened yet or matches ending before they began. And this is the legitimate second biggest company in the country at the moment.

And here’s MIA dressed as Bill Clinton. MIA is Misfits in Action for those of you lucky enough to not know. Their big chested girl comes out and takes her shirt off to distract Juvy and it only gets two, making it pointless. The Juvy Driver gets two as this has been a decent match. The Tornado DDT ends it for Chavo.

Rating: B-. Very good opener here, but again, what did we need the run-ins for? You have two guys that can fly and do their thing out there as well as anyone but instead we need 9 run-ins and girls taking their clothes off and masks. Again, good wrestling is overshadowed by cheap parlor tricks.

The Jung Dragons are in Miller’s office and we get the point: they’re parodying Rush Hour. Ignore the fact that the movie came out two years before this and the sequel wouldn’t come until next year. They’re using quotes from the movie and we have a black guy that can’t shut up and Asians that only partially understand. Jarrett comes in and wants Hogan. He has a fat woman here to sing for Hogan. I kid you not. Hogan isn’t here yet. Oh and the belt he’s wearing is a replica of the real belt which is damaged and it’s very obvious due to an outline around the edges.

Hardcore Title: Big Vito vs. ???

Vito is a mobster or Italian stereotype or something. It was supposed to be Johnny the Bull and Terry Funk but they hurt each other so instead we get these two.

Hardcore Title: Big Vito vs. Norman Smiley/Ralphus

Smiley got ridiculously over as hardcore champion so they immediately pulled him off TV. This is his return. According to WCW hardcore rules, the match has to start in the back and work its way to the ring. That of course doesn’t happen here but they mention it anyway.

They do it backwards so they go to the back after starting in the arena. And now they have to go back to the ring for the pin to end in there. Yes, they managed to screw up the hardcore division by adding rules to the division without rules. Norman does the Big Wiggle which is basically a dance that is supposed to look like sodomy. Ralphus is toothless and incredibly fat so he wears a half shirt. He also beats up the champion.

Norman’s character is that he’s terrified of being beaten up yet he kept retaining the belt by accident. For instance he had an I Quit match for the belt but he got hit in the throat by a martial arts shot and couldn’t speak. The guy he was fighting shouted at him to say I quit, thereby losing the match.

The thing is Smiley could go move for move with Benoit or Regal and was hilarious at comedy stuff so he got incredibly popular. Like I said, he was then taken off TV as a reward. He gets thrown in an elevator so it’s Ralphus vs. Vito. The fans chant for Ralphus so of course he gets his teeth kicked in. It’s table time. A splash through Ralphus ends it. Norman comes back after the match to do nothing.

Rating: D. So let’s look at this again: WCW based this match on the return of a guy and then had him leave the match halfway through and has him lose. There’s another example of the questionable booking that’s going on here. It’s just the lack of logic in the booking that you get like this.

Ad for New Blood Rising, the next PPV.

Goldberg, the heel (another BRILLIANT move as we turned the only popular guy left in the company heel) shows up with Scott Hall’s contract in his pocket. He has a match with Nash for that later on.

Nash wants Hall to come back. And remember, these same two would still be tag champions over ten years later.

We recap Daffney vs. Miss Hancock (Stacy Keibler). The idea is that David Flair left his storyline fiancé Daffney for his real life fiancé Miss Hancock. In other words we’re having a match over an angle being dropped. This is what we were dealing with here. Oh and it’s a wedding gown match.

Miss Hancock vs. Daffney

Naturally Stacy looks gorgeous. This wound up going to a pregnancy angle where there was supposed to be incest of some kind, I believe with Stacy being Ric’s daughter or him being the father of the baby or something like that. It never came through due to the lack of business but whatever. And yes that’s the Scream Queen of TNA. She’s also the better in ring competitor here. Stacy is 20 here. That’s hard to believe.

There’s wedding cake here too. Instead of trying to win they go for the cake. David is on his second interference so far. The referee gets pantsed and so does David. Now the girls chase each other around the ring and we try to shave Daffney’s head. Oh look it’s Crowbar to interfere even more. He takes his pants off to keep things even. We do get a funny line of “he’s choking David Flair with his pants!” And then Stacy just strips for the heck of it so that Daffney wins. Daffney hits her with cake.

Rating: N/A. Not wrestling, but the girls both looked good. This is what I get for watching WCW from 2000 though so I bring this on myself.

Ernest Miller wants to find Ox Baker to be on the card (he had been retired for 12 years and would be in his late 60s at this point) and is walking around in the back. The Jung Dragons try to sneak up on him but they have music accompanying them wherever they go, so they can’t sneak up on him. And you thought TNA was illogical.

According to Tony it’s clear that Miller is waiting on the arrival of Hogan. While the announcers talk the fans behind him get more interested in something else and look the other way for something with the announcers not noticing at all. The delay is to clean up the cake by the way because we couldn’t put down a mat or a removable thing to prevent this kind of a delay.

Tony: “it was here…well not here but close to here, about 80 miles from here. Now let’s go back to two years later…” He can’t even speak English properly! By the way we’re at about 5 minutes of just killing time here while we clean up the mat because you know, there isn’t a promo or something we could go to or a segment where some young guys get some camera time to develop their characters a tiny bit. That could never happen right?

Tag Titles: Perfect Event vs. Kronik

That would be Chuck Palumbo/Shawn Stasiak vs. Adam Bomb/Crush by the way. Stasiak is using Mr. Perfect’s music and is called Perfectshawn. They even feuded. The same happened with Palumbo and Lex Luger. Kronik were made up of weed jokes. This of course is the top tag feud in the company.

Kronik had the belts and the Perfect Event “accidentally” won them and we’re constantly told that Kronik should destroy the champions here and get the belts back. Great way to build up the champions there guys. Palumbo has a flex bar called the Lex Flexor. You know, so we can be reminded of the guy that he’s imitating and that did the gimmick better.

So the champions are being destroyed here and this is perfectly fine apparently. They try to have Crush (why bother with the real names?) is supposed to be dumped over the top due to heel cheating. It doesn’t work but it’s sold by the announcers anyway. Hey, the champions are actually winning! Tony: “we’re not used to seeing the champions in control like this!”

See what I mean here? No title in WCW meant a thing so there was no point to watch feuds to get to a title which meant there was no point to building big matches so there was no point in watching. Another line from Tony: “Amazingly they’re (the champions) in charge!” Could you please stop burying your champions?

The match is barely watchable at best as they’re going through a standard formula but the dynamic is all wrong as the big strong guys are the faces in peril which is completely backwards from what it’s supposed to be. Oh and Kronik could be hired to protect people, which is nothing at all like the Acolyte PROTECTION Agency which was also two big guys that beat people up for money. See with the APA, one guy wasn’t white. Totally different characters entirely. What a silly mistake to make!

Crush uses what we would call an F5 and I say uses in the weakest sense of the word. This is of course a total mess and has no real resemblance of a tag match. Double chokeslam to Stasiak but Palumbo saves. He gets a double shot as well and a Doomsday Device with a powerbomb instead of an electric chair ends it. Oh and the crowd is 16,000 people now instead of about 6,500 like it really is.

Rating: D-. Like I said the dynamic here was completely off. This just did nothing at all and the booking of the champions gave me no reason at all to watch this match. It was FAR too long also at almost fifteen minutes. Yes these guys got 13 minutes or so on PPV, which is longer than Chavo and Juvy, two talented guys, got. See the problem here?

The Cat is trying to get James Brown on the PPV (they actually did that at one point) and Jarrett comes in as he looks for the Jung Dragons or whoever is making that music. Jarrett threatens to mess up the show because he’s bored. So am I buddy. The Dragons beat him up.

Kanyon vs. Booker T

Kanyon is Positively Kanyon here as he imitates DDP. Seriously, is ANYONE here an original character? We hear of a graveyard match later on which is the KISS Demon vs. Vampiro. Oh I can’t wait for that one. Booker is one of the few guys in WCW to get to the top from the ground and he was pretty impressive in doing so. Booker is over as free beer in a frat house here.

Why are these guys fighting again? Oh we’re not going to be told? Ok then just thought I’d ask. Madden goes on a rant against DDP of course because DDP had talent and people cared about him at some point. Allegedly Kanyon is wearing DDP’s tights. Pay no attention to the fact that DDP normally wore black or jeans and Kanyon is in red or that the tights look nothing like DDP’s but whatever.

Booker takes a brick out of the DDP book that Kanyon is carrying with him. And then Booker slips getting out of the ring. Kanyon puts the steps on Booker and drives them down with a chair. The referee doesn’t seem to care as I guess he’s as put to sleep as I am by the earlier parts of this show.

Kanyon was indeed good at coming up with offense. Oh apparently Booker thinks Kanyon is something wrong with WCW so he’s fighting him to get rid of him. Well that’s better than nothing. Kanyon does a bunch of stuff to Booker’s back including a reverse Boston Crab which actually would be FAR less painful than a regular one but whatever.

Kanyon hits Booker with a book that used to have a brick in it. There’s no brick in it but Booker sells it anyway. Oh he was playing possum. The Axe Kick hits as does the Book End (Rock Bottom, and pay no attention to Booker being considered the People’s Champion and having his catchphrase added to the start of his theme music). And here’s Jarrett with a guitar shot to Booker so the Diamond Cutter from Kanyon ends it.

Rating: C-. Decent match here, but of course there was interference and a weapon in use here because it wouldn’t be WCW if we didn’t have those. This was a great example of what could have been a good match being overbooked and messed up for no apparent reason at all. What’s the point of that again? Ah I forgot: there isn’t one.

Mike Awesome hits on the fat singer.

US Title: Scott Steiner vs. Mike Awesome

So this was around the time that Steiner was completely insane in the back and was constantly getting into legal trouble and being suspended with pay. For example he got in a backstage fight and then suspended. It was the 4th of July weekend and he was paid on the suspension. He broke the rules and got a paid holiday vacation. The roids were absolutely insane at this time and he was legit crazy for the most part. Awesome runs out but Steiner hits him instead, making himself look like the face which he isn’t.

Awesome has been in WCW for like three or four months at this point, having left ECW for WCW which was safer. Humorously enough, ECW filed for bankruptcy after WCW was bought by Vince. ECW lasted longer than WCW. Let that sink in for a bit as I never realized it before. Steiner is beating Awesome badly here and it’s flat out stupid. In other words, they’re killing off another character for the sake of Steiner. That would become a running theme in WCW: young and talented guys being sacrificed to old guys.

There’s a bell to the head. Oh but that isn’t a DQ either and neither is that chair shot right in front of the referee. Awesome hits a springboard splash for two. Good night that guy could fly. And here’s Miller AGAIN for no apparent reason. He’s fine after the beatdown earlier too. We’ll just keep the camera on him too since nothing important is going on at the moment at all. Steiner sets for the Recliner but Miller says oh no you don’t. That earns him a right hand. Nice job boss.

The top rope splash gets two as Steiner kicks out of another finishing move. And there goes the referee since that just has to happen. Miller comes in and accidentally kicks Awesome. Steiner hits him to a big pop and then the Recliner…isn’t put on yet as Miller says he’ll strip him of the title if he uses it. Steiner does it and so does Miller. He doesn’t give it to Awesome or anything so whatever. Scott beats Awesome up even more and gets even more pops. Hey, let’s make sure we keep this incredibly popular guy as top heel though.

Rating: C. This was a very intense match that had a great thing of going back and forth with people kicking out of one thing after another. And then of course Miller had to do a run-in because….well just because. In other words, more overbooked stuff where WCW simply refuses to accept that Steiner is popular so they do what they want to do instead of listening to the fans. Typical.

Should be noted that we just had the 6th match. Other than the hardcore match, there have been either run-ins or weapons used in all of them.

The Demon vs. Vampiro

This is a graveyard match. The Demon was part of a marketing deal with the band KISS. Here’s the idea: WCW decided that their wrestling wasn’t drawing good enough ratings so they decided to have musical guests on Nitro, one of which was KISS. The idea was that eventually each member of the band would have a wrestler based on their persona.

Originally Brian Adams of Kronik was the Gene Simmons one but he changed his mind and it was given to Dale Torborg, the guy that played him here. He was a jobber so no one recognized him for the most part. Ok that’s all well and good then. However, KISS pulled out so he became just The Demon and no one cared. He was in Vampiro’s stable and then left it, making this match. Oh and the KISS concert was the lowest rated quarter segment in the history of the Monday Night Wars.

So anyway, Demon tells the girl with him to not follow him. She says she won’t. He turns around and she follows him anyway. It’s like something out of a bad comedy show. You win this by getting back to the ring. And remember that this is nothing like a social outcast being in a boiler room and having to get back to the ring at all.

You also can’t see anything here as this is in an actual graveyard. Vampiro jumps out of a tree. Wow. Apparently this is about Sting somehow. Yeah whatever. Let’s just get this over with. Vampiro drags Demon down into an open grave. Again do I even need to make fun of this?

Vampiro chases the girl (Asya, which is nothing like the big muscle chick in WWF also named after a geographic region in the Far East. She had black hair) The referee is following them with a flashlight for crying out loud. Tony points out that this is now a footrace.

They’re by a stream or something like that and Vampiro knocks him into the water. WHAT AM I WATCHING??? The referee gets the Demon out of the water as I think I’m watching Buffy or Charmed. Demon chases after him and finds Asya next to a coffin. Vampiro pops out of it and spits blood at him and then hits him with a tombstone before putting him in the coffin.

And apparently the match isn’t over yet as we’re going to talk to Shane Douglas. Ok then. He talks about Buff Bagwell and how he guarantees victory tonight. I guess we’ll call that the end of the match too.

Rating: N/A. This wasn’t wrestling and I have no idea what it was. It was stupid though.

Ad for a sweepstakes where you could be Goldberg’s guest manager. Well that’s original if nothing else.

Buff Bagwell vs. Shane Douglas

They were partners and they broke up. That’s all I’ve got. Buff stalls to start despite being the face here. Bagwell is yet another example of a guy that was around forever and got some small pushes but never once was given the chance to be actually elevated. He had a cool finisher, a catchy song, a good name and a great look, but hey we can’t put him in the upper midcard or give him anything serious right? I’m not saying he would have been the second coming of Kurt Angle, but I’m saying what did they have to lose from trying?

Shane goes for a piledriver on the floor which doesn’t work. He gets crotched on the post instead. Are there just no rules in WCW anymore? After a long time of nothing, Torrie comes out and slaps Douglas. I’ll start the clock on how long before she turns on Buff to help Shane.

She and Buff kiss and she makes it a whole a minute without turning. Ah there it is. That of course doesn’t end it as we have to wait even longer. Buff shoves her down but walks into the Franchiser (reverse Stunner more or less) to end it. Madden says he has a Head Cheerleader now. Give me a break, although Torrie is hotter.

Rating: D. This was, just like many other matches on the card tonight, completely boring and based around a predictable heel turn that did nothing at all for anyone. This wasn’t interesting at all and was just filler. It wasn’t particularly bad. It just wasn’t any good at all.

HOGAN IS HERE!

Jarrett isn’t worried.

We recap Hogan vs. Jarrett which is basically over Jarrett had Goldberg hurt Hogan and then started getting fat women to audition to sing for him.

WCW World Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Jeff Jarrett

And this is the reason for the whole issue of this show. I’ll save the details of what’s going on until everything is over. The music plays and there’s no Jarrett. Note that Tony calls Hogan Terry Bollea. That’ll come into play later. Instead here’s Vince Russo with a bat. Now he hadn’t been seen in a good while so this was a legit shock.

He looks ticked off too. Ah there’s Jarrett. Russo is called Keyzer Soze so you know he’s evil. Hogan is Hollywood Hogan here. He comes out looks fine and does his thing. Hogan asks for the mic and Jarrett has walked up the ramp and is just standing there. He cuts a very basic and generic promo with nothing wrong with it at all and here comes Jarrett.

There’s the bell and Jarrett lays down. Russo signals to Hogan to cover him and then throws him the belt. Madden says they’re deviating away from the script. The fans chant Russo sucks. Hogan gets on the mic again and says crap like this is the reason this company is in the place it’s in. Hogan puts his foot on the chest and wins the world title.

Hudson: “We’re going to have some explaining to do tomorrow.” Keep that in mind. Hogan and Jarrett leave and both look very ticked off. The announcers run down Hogan and HEAVILY imply the whole thing is scripted, as in the match would have been scripted.

I’m going to skip ahead a little here so if for some reason you’re reading along as you watch the show or something like that, this is going to appear out of order but I’m doing that on purpose, so what I’m about to talk about came a bit later on than where I’m saying it did.

Russo comes back out and cuts the promo that caused ALL the problems. Ok not all of them but all of them tonight. He’s going to tell it like it is apparently. He talks about the politics backstage and that he doesn’t need this place. However he came back for guys like Booker T and MIA. And he just lost me. Hogan doesn’t care about the company and is a politician. Russo says that today Hogan insisted that he win the title tonight and played his creative control card to do so. You’ll NEVER see him again.

Russo goes on to say that no one will be ripped off here tonight. You know aside from not seeing the main event they paid to see. Russo flat out says the WCW belt means jack but that’s no longer the world title. Jarrett is still the world champion apparently and will defend against Booker T, which was the same match from Thunder last week but whatever. He calls Hogan a big bald SOB and throws the mic down.

Tony says that was a shoot. Hudson says that wasn’t talked about in the production meeting and it wasn’t on the format sheet. Don’t believe him? Have a look at this format sheet I’m holding up then. That sums up things well I’d say.

Ok. That last line that he said is what sent this whole thing completely to the grave. Scratch that. It put it through the bottom of the grave and buried it even further somehow. Let’s go back to the beginning and the idea that sums this whole thing up: Vince Russo is an idiot. Here was his idea: fake a shoot. Russo’s theory of booking is this: what you’re watching is fake, but you need to pretend that it’s real.

However at times there are going to be “real” (as in fake shoots) moments. This was one of those “real” things. Everything Russo said in his speech about the creative control card may have been true, but he’s saying that none of this was planned in advance, which in real life it was (and I mean REAL life, not “real” life if that makes sense).

The idea was that Terry Bollea the character played his creative control card rather than Terry Bollea the real person. Later on, as in maybe the late fall or at Starrcade, Hogan would return and feud with whoever the WCW Champion was, saying that he was the REAL champion since he had the belt.

That’s plausible I guess, but then Russo gave his speech. The last line about the bald headed SOB made Terry Bollea (the REAL Terry Bollea, not Terry Bollea the character) mad because he felt it was character defamation that could hurt his future earnings. In other words, he was mad at Russo for saying bad things about his character. So he of course sued Russo. I mean he sued him in real life in a case that was still in court in 2004 which is why he didn’t go to TNA then. Anyway, Hogan never did come back because of that last line, making a “shoot” into a shoot.

Oh and a side note: Jarrett wasn’t in on this. Allegedly it was just Hogan, Russo and Bischoff. Great way to bring the locker room together guys.

Now here’s why Russo is stupid. Number one: this was NEVER MENTIONED AGAIN. They NEVER gave anything at all as far of an explanation or why Booker was the champion other than he beat Jeff Jarrett (yeah I know big spoiler. Shoot me.). Oh and as a side note: Jarrett pinned Booker to get a title shot the next night anyway which is stupid in ways I can’t even fathom.

The second reason Russo was stupid: NO ONE KNEW WHAT HE WAS TALKING ABOUT. Think about it. How many wrestling fans out of say 10,000 would know what a shoot is? Or would know what creative control was? Or would know anything about backstage politics? We know about them because we’re smarks. This is what we do.

Russo thinks EVERYONE is a smark, or at least a HUGE majority of the fans. Tell me: the last time you went to a wrestling event, of the people around you, how many knew less about wrestling than you did? How many could tell you that Stephanie and HHH were really married the entire time and that it was real before it was revealed last year on Raw?

Russo believed everyone knew what he was talking about and that there were very few fans that cheered for good guys and booed bad guys just because that’s what you’re supposed to do. It was all about knowing more than the next guy and being “in” on the business.

The problem is MAYBE 3% of the people there knew what he meant when he was saying all this stuff and that’s likely a high number. This didn’t raise ratings, no one extra bought the PPV because of it since no one knew it was coming, and since it was never talked about again no one had any reason to build to it.

In other words, if you didn’t buy the PPV you never knew it happened and if you did buy the PPV then you were just confused by it unless you were maybe 1 out of every 1,000 fans that was on the internet back then. Like I said, today when the internet is MUCH more powerful and has heavier traffic than it did 10 years ago, most fans simply don’t get that far into wrestling.

As for my thoughts on it, it’s really not as big as the Fingerpoke of Doom for one reason: WCW still had a chance then. At that point WCW was in big trouble but there was a CHANCE they could have come back and made a run of it, especially with Austin about to get hurt and with the REALLY bad TV WWF would put out over that year (a big reason WWF won wasn’t because they were great.

It’s just that WCW was that awful). This was par for the course really when you consider the state of WCW. I mean look at this show before all this happened. There hasn’t been a clean finish all night, there’s more cursing, there’s more sex and the angles and characters are stupider.

WCW was dead at this point and they knew it. In 1999, they still had a legit chance to turn it around. This isn’t as much a referendum on the company as it is on Russo and Hogan. This was more like the final nail in the coffin whereas the Fingerpoke was the fatal wound.

Oh yeah we have two matches left.

Vampiro walks to the ring and wins the match from earlier. He has a mic as everyone else does and says the dark circle is now completed and the Demon is dead. The fans want Sting and here come 8 Stings. They have a coffin like the one Torborg was in earlier. Oh of course Sting is in it. Vampiro is put in the coffin and then he disappears.

Goldberg wants to hurt Nash so he can get rid of Hall’s contract. How in the world did they mess up Goldberg?

We recap Nash vs. Goldberg. (everything else is in order by the way) Goldberg turned heel and joined the New Blood (Stupid, stupid, stupid) and becoming top heel in the company. SUPER NASH came to the rescue and somehow Hall became the focus of this despite not being on TV at this point for about four and a half months or so but whatever.

Kevin Nash vs. Bill Goldberg

They start off brawling but Steiner is here in like a minute and a half playing cheerleader. He’s apparently a face tonight but you know he’s turning on Nash here. Spear misses though. Yep there it is. Nash fight him off but the spear and Jackhammer end it. This wasn’t even five minutes long. They beat up Nash and rip up the contracts to cheers.

Rating: N/A. This was barely even a match and was really just a way to do a turn. Yeah I don’t care either but this whole thing was just a mess. They took the main event of the biggest show of the year and had it go four minutes here. I’ll never get some things about this company.

WCW World Title: Jeff Jarrett vs. Booker T

One has to wonder why the guy that would wind up leaving as champion would have jobbed to a midcarder earlier but that would imply logic so there we are. Oh and they have the other world title there, as in the original one. Tony says he hasn’t seen it in years because the top is bent. And it just happened to be there tonight. Right. Either that or they got it to the arena in like 30 minutes. So it’s a pizza? See if this had happened say two years ago (as in Booker being in the main event) this could have meant something. We get a nice technical sequence as Booker is completely over.

We hit the crowd and walk around for a little bit with very limited actual offense or anything like that. Again, why are we having to do this? Are you telling me we can’t have these two give us a solid in ring match? And there are the weapons to really suck away any real chance of this being awesome. Jarrett piledrives him on the announce table. Now here’s the thing: the violence like this in a match is fine.

This is a big match so they’re going the extra mile. There’s nothing wrong with that and I can understand relaxing the rules for it. The problem with that is literally every match tonight has had a run-in or weapons used. It makes things like this seem less special or less intense. Even ECW had gotten that message by this point and had toned it down.

Now that being said, this is a solid match, but the lack of drama hurts it as ONCE AGAIN WCW blows the chance to show a feel good moment on PPV. Here’s the thing: Booker is clearly popular. Him winning the title tonight is going to be a big moment. The problem is that NO ONE KNOWS THIS IS GOING ON, other than people that bought the PPV.

Instead of announcing Booker as the title shot, they went with Hogan and wound up giving us Booker, rather than taking a chance on Booker as a draw. We hear about how this isn’t about politics and is about athleticism. If by that they mean desperation then I’d agree. Somehow this is Jarrett’s match of his life. Just….no. It’s figure four time as I’m tempted to predict a Flair run-in here.

Tony and the other announcers talk about how much Booker has had to go through here, including the grating of the political thing with Hogan earlier tonight. Did ANYONE know how to think in this company? The Axe Kick connects and Jarrett more or less no sells it for no apparent reason. And now, le sigh as down goes the referee. A belt shot to Jarrett gets a long two.

We get a bunch of low blows and chair shots and now Jarrett just says screw it and this the Stroke on the referee. The Book End hits and another referee counts the pin. The fans all cheer and raise the roof which was Booker’s signature thing and it’s a big feel good moment. We’ll ignore the absolute destruction of any kind of sanity and the fact that the company was dead by this point too, as this comes oh about 2 years too late to mean anything.

Rating: B. Again, this was a good match. The problems surrounding it however made anything we could have gotten out of it completely pointless and useless though. Also like I said, Jarrett would pin him the next night anyway. This was a solid match and the moment was cool, but the levels of idiocy it took to get here absolutely astound me.

Overall Rating: D-. Now there are two ways to look at this show and all subsequent shows. For one, this show was a total trainwreck with maybe two good matches out of about 9 and both were more or less overbooked. The idiocy is running rampant here, but at the same time this wasn’t completely terrible. It was mostly terrible and anything close to order here is strictly an accident mind you. WCW’s level of ineptitude would somehow be topped next month which we’ll get to later.

And then there’s another school of thought. The other idea is to look at this like a screwball comedy show and accept that WCW was completely and utterly dead at this point and was just waiting on someone to notice the smell of their rotting corpse. If you go on that route, the show goes WAY up in value as the comedy of it is pretty solid.

After the disaster that was Nitro the next night, everything was ripped apart backstage as the entire company was overhauled by the Time-Warner merger that threw it off the air. Anyway though, this is either a great show or absolutely horrible depending on how you look at it, so figure that out for yourselves.




Monday Nitro: July 6, 1998 – He Da Man!

Monday Nitro
Date: July 6, 1998
Location: Georgia Dome, Atlanta, Georgia
Attendance: 41,412
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Larry Zbyszko, Mike Tenay

So I found a website where I can download every episode of Nitro. This is very helpful since there are some individual episodes I want to review but can’t do because it would take months if not years to get up to them going from the beginning like I’ve been doing. This show is important for multiple reasons. There are 12 matches here on a 3 hour TV card. For one thing, this is one of the very last wins for Nitro. Other than the Warrior weeks of all things and the night after Halloween Havoc 98, Nitro never won again, which was due to more idiocy and cost them millions of dollars but that’s another story.

The reason this show is something I’ve wanted to do is because it has the loudest pop and one of the coolest moments ever. Tonight is the night the Goldberg faces Hulk Hogan for the world title. Now there is a backstory here. Since this is WCW’s home area, a lot of the big shots from Turner were going to be there. Hogan thought to himself that if I’m in the main event and we draw a record crowd (they did) then the executives will think I caused it. The idea was to announce a POST show NON title match between Hogan and Goldberg. Somehow this got changed to a TELEVISED TITLE match. This was announced a mere FOUR DAYS before the show. Now let’s take a look at why this is very stupid.

Number one: It’s HOGAN vs. GOLDBERG. That’s the main event of Starrcade, not a Nitro in July. This was 1998. It’s not like the company was completely dead here or Hogan didn’t mean anything. This was still Hulk Hogan and he was still a huge draw. Goldberg was undefeated here and had broken 100 wins and was US Champion so he was a huge deal. This is a PPV main event at minimum and the biggest match of the year more than likely. That probably cost them millions and millions of dollars.

Number two: This was announced 4 days before the match happened. With the internet being a very limited factor, if you didn’t see Thunder, there’s a very good chance you didn’t know this match was happening at all. On Rise and Fall of WCW, they tried to make it sound like all the tickets were sold the day the match was announced. In other words, WCW would like you to believe that NO ONE bought a ticket to Nitro until they knew about this match.

Number three: This shows how obsessed Bischoff had become with beating Vince, even for one night. The ratings streak had come to an end and Nitro had lost like 5 or 6 weeks in a row. Bischoff decided that it was worth giving away all that money for a surefire win. The problem was that only diehard fans and the people working for the companies would know this and it wouldn’t bring in much money at all. This became a trend for Bischoff as he became obsessed with a quick solution to WCW’s problems when there simply wasn’t one anywhere.

Number four: This is the last one I promise. This threw off all creative plans for WCW. Keep in mind that Hogan was world champion at this point and all of a sudden Goldberg was going to be. Any plans they had for Hogan, which included matches with Nash and Hart likely coming by the end of the year including Hart at Starrcade, were now being thrown away in favor of Goldberg being world champion. Since there were very few upper midcard/main event heels other than Hogan, this made limited sense. In other words it was perfect for WCW.

Now with that all being said, let’s get to the 11 preliminary matches to get to the reason I’m reviewing this.

We open with a video from Thunder of James Jay Dillon making the announcement of the match, four days prior to this. I actually got a chill when he said Goldberg was the challenger. Make no mistake about it: WCW could do drama when they had to.

The place is PACKED as this is where NFL games are played, making this a major PPV size crowd. Wrestlemania 27 will be held there. If I remember right at the time this was the 4th biggest American crowd ever. This is a three hour show and oddly enough the commentators change each hour. The listed ones are the openers.

The Nitro Girls dance us into the show. They were like cheerleaders and would almost all become TV characters eventually. Larry as always does a salute to the crowd.

Hogan actually starts us off with Disciple (Brutus Beefcake), Bischoff and Liz with him. We need to take a moment and honor the herd of cows that died to make all the leather they’re wearing. May you moo in peace. Dang now I want a burger. This is the go home show for Bash at the Beach, where the main event was Hogan and Dennis Rodman (basketball player) vs. DDP/Karl Malone (Hall of Fame basketball player who was inducted earlier tonight actually).

He talks about all the fans and the PPV on Sunday while saying exactly what you would expect him to say. Hogan says the name of his opponent tonight and says the match isn’t happening. It should be noted that Hogan says jabroni here, which may predate Rock saying it, but I’m not sure. Hogan says he has an NWO guy coming in that Hogan has to beat first. Cue the chant, which is deafening and might be legit given that it’s his hometown.

Ad for the Hogan shirt, which really was cool looking.

We talk to a guy that won a NASCAR racecar last year and they’re giving away another one. We’re only 15 minutes into the show now with no matches but whatever.

TV Title: Dean Malenko vs. Booker T

Expect a lot of matches that have no point and are really just there for the sake of filling up the show. Booker is TV Champion at this point but no word if that is a title match yet. Booker is WAY over here, but wouldn’t get pushed for like two years. Apparently it’s on the line. Ok then. Bret Hart, the HUGE signing from WWF a mere 7 months ago, has a shot at the winner on Sunday. That sums up their second set of problems.

The mat is dark gray which is weird to see and makes it seem like a really weird atmosphere. Both guys do standard stuff and then crank it up as Booker misses a Missile Dropkick, which was his finisher. Cloverleaf is blocked and a bunch of kicks put Dean down. We hit the floor and Jericho pops up with a mic. His distraction is enough to let Booker hit the Axe Kick to Dean for the pin to retain.

Rating: B-. For a quick TV match this was pretty good. Did you expect anything less from these two though? Dean and Jericho would feud for awhile over the Cruiserweight Title that Jericho had and while the matches were good, nothing ever came of it of course since WCW couldn’t push guys that were young and talented right? This was solid enough for an opener and I would love to see more of these guys.

Goldberg can do pushups.

Karl Malone is ready for the PPV.

Kanyon vs. Raven

Kanyon has just recently lost the Mortis mask and is feuding with the Flock now for the sake of feuding with the Flock I guess. Ah ok Kanyon/Mortis wanted to be in the Flock and Raven said no. It’s on in the aisle and Kanyon takes over. We’re on the floor again already. Dang they’re moving out there tonight. Kanyon gets a reverse F5 onto a chair which was kind of cool.

Lodi, who was pure awesomness back in the day, crotches Kanyon on the top rope. After a SICK suplex onto the open chair, Saturn runs in, which is somehow a DQ after all the stuff with the chair. He and Kanyon are teaming on Thursday and he accidentally hits a Death Valley Driver on him here. Saturn does a huge dive onto a table onto Raven which doesn’t move AT ALL. Kanyon takes down Saturn afterwards.

Rating: C+. I liked this but then again Kanyon’s offense back then was great stuff. This was really just to further the angle on Thursday. You have to keep in mind that a lot of stuff was going on with Nitro and WCW back in the day as they had the same amount of TV that WWE has currently but it was one show. That meant a lot more was going on at the time and you had to pay more attention to everything. This was opposed to WWF where there was Raw and Sunday Night Heat. Smackdown didn’t come into existence for over a year after this. Match was good but just furthering an angle and rather short.

Buff Bagwell is here. He had his neck legit broken in a match with Rick Steiner and is in a wheelchair. We get Judy Bagwell, the first OCW Champion as well.

The Nitro Girls dance to what would become Stacy’s theme song.

We see last week where Malone and Page drove to the arena in a semi-truck. The NWO was waiting with a bunch of weapons for them and amazingly enough a semi-truck coming straight for them is enough to scare them off. Malone slams Hogan and has the longest arms I’ve ever seen.

Malone and DDP come out. Given that he was a celebrity that never wrestled before, Malone actually did quite well in the ring at the PPV. It helps a lot having a guy that is a full time athlete out there because you don’t have to worry about conditioning or anything like that which gets a lot out of the way. Page was just awesome at this point and had been for like a year. Malone putting his arm around Okerlund is funny for some reason. He can’t really talk but he’s trying.

Ad for the DDP shirt, which I remember very well.

Mongo talks about joining the Horsemen, which he was awful at but he tried at least. Mike Ditka makes a cameo. He wants them to reform the Horsemen. We’ll get to that.

We’re 42 minutes into this without even counting the commercials of which there have been at least 3 and we’ve had two matches.

Scott Putski vs. Scotty Riggs

Oh just make it short. When Riggs is by far the better worker, you know you’re in trouble. Yep they’re just talking about the potential Hogan vs. Goldberg match. I can’t say I blame them here though. We actually talk about the match a bit as Riggs is dominant. Larry talks about Ivan Putski, Scott’s dad, who was pretty awful.

Both guys hit cross bodies at the same time to get us back to even. Putski plays to the crowd to no reaction and then hits his dad’s move, the Polish Hammer. It’s a double axe handle to the chest but instead of covering, he tries to get the crowd to care and picks Riggs up. Crossface Chickenwing (Riggs’ finisher) is blocked into a sitout spinebuster for the pin by Putski. Sweet merciful pig meat this was bad.

Rating: F. Why did these guys get five minutes? The match was horrible and no one cared. Riggs is somehow the far better and more successful of these guys. Putski was somehow worse than his dad, which means he’s in the running for worst wrestler of all time.

Goldberg headbutts a locker which was one of his signature things.

We look at his first win which was over Hugh Morrus, which was a legit shocker.

Scott Hall is the surprise opponent for Goldberg.

Chris Jericho vs. Ultimo Dragon

Not sure if this is for the title or not since they won’t tell us that. I’d bet on a Dean run in here but I’m not sure. Jericho says Rey is the #1 contender for some reason and here’s Dillon. He’s commissioner more or less if that wasn’t clear. Dean comes out and Dillon is taller than both of them. There’s no contact between them and if there is, no match. Jericho tries to bait him and eventually gets him by implying his parents cheated on each other.

And now we actually get the match. They actually did go with Rey vs. Jericho at the PPV which is odd. You can’t say it was bait and switch though so they’re clean on that. That corner handstand that Dragon did was always cool looking. Dean runs in about two minutes in and jumps Jericho, pulling out some of his hair.

Rating: N/A. I’m not sure if we ever got the showdown between these two which sucks as it could have been awesome.

Dean gets taken away in handcuffs.

The Nitro Girls dance and Heenan joins commentary with I think both other guys leaving so it’s him and Tony.

Chavo Guerrero vs. Johnny Swinger

Swinger was in ECW later on and was at Hardcore Justice recently. Tenay is still on commentary so Bobby replaced Larry so far. Swinger cuts a really bad heel promo to start. Chavo has short tights and a hard hat. He’s crazy at this point and wants to cut Eddie’s hair. He’s going to wrestle in the hat. Ok then.

We get the announced attendance: 39,919. Now here’s the odd thing. That’s 1,300 people LOWER than it really was. Yeah for some reason they cut down the potential over 40,000 people attendance number. WCW continues to astound. The hat comes off and the fans are pretty bored. Tornado DDT ends it in like 90 seconds though so at least it didn’t last long. Chavo cuts some of Swinger’s hair afterwards. Hair vs. hair is announced for the PPV with him vs. Eddie.

We see Goldberg’s 25th win in a row, which was over Glacier.

Goldberg keeps warming up.

Disco Inferno/Alex Wright vs. Public Enemy

I didn’t know Public Enemy was around this long. Wow they were there for the entirety of 97? I never knew that. Tokyo Magnum, a Japanese dancer, follows Wright out and dances too. Brawl to start with the Public Enemy dominating. The more famous team is wearing Braves jerseys for cheap pops as they’re on a streat that would get them almost to the World Series if I remember right.

Tony talks about Thunder in Wyoming of all things. The heels dominate here as we’re told that Magnum is a fan of the Dancing Fools (later named the Boogie Knights). Grunge comes in and beats up Disco as we have two tables set up on the floor. Disco and Wright run off and Magnum goes through the pair of tables. Here they are again with weapons to beat down the Public Enemy for a DQ I guess.

Rating: D. Just a match to set up the whole big table spot at the end which was indeed cool looking. Public Enemy never went anywhere in WCW once the NWO showed up although they did win the tag titles almost two years before this. Not a good match or anything and not really even a match, but it did the job it was supposed to do so mild points for that.

Gene brings out Bagwell in his hometown. He comes out to the NWO music and has his mother pushing him in the wheelchair. There’s something hilarious about that. He’s a total face here which implies to me he’ll be turning soon. Bagwell talks about how he and Scott Steiner need to go their own ways and that he loves his mom.

Goldberg beats up some guy named Rick Fuller and is 50-0. His match with Hall is next.

US Title: Goldberg vs. Scott Hall

The bald one has to win to get the REAL bald one for the title. I’m not sure if the chants are piped in here or not. Ok apparently this is a US Title match. They really need to work on making it clear what matches are for titles. Hall hits those shoulders that he’s kind of known for. Naturally they don’t work as it’s all Goldberg. To say this match is sloppy is an understatement.

It never ceases to amaze me how they managed to screw up Goldberg. Hall is clearly not someone that needs to be in the ring at this point as he was really messed up with substance abuse etc. It’s also his first televised match in two months which likely isn’t helping him. Then again I find him incredibly overrated. Goldberg beats him up and Hall calls down NWO guys.

Cue Disciple and Vincent but DDP and Malone pop them with chairs and it’s back to one on one. Hall calls for the Razor’s Edge and is LAUNCHED onto his back. Spear sets up the Jackhammer and the roof is partially gone since it’s on for later tonight. Again, HOW DID THEY MESS HIM UP?

Rating: D+. Bad match but that’s not the point here. This was about setting up Goldberg as the unstoppable force for later tonight which was kind of overkill but it fit Hogan pretty well I guess. This was relative dominance and it worked rather well. Hall just wasn’t worth a thing at this point though and it didn’t look pretty.

The Nitro Girls dance again. You might be getting the idea here. One is Whisper, who would marry one Shawn Michaels.

Juventud Guerrera vs. Psicosis

Juvi has no mask at this point since those things bringing in money was just not going to be tolerated. This is a bring down the crowd match after the whole insanity just a few minutes ago. With time this could be awesome but if it goes past four minutes I’d be stunned. AWESOME back splash off the top onto the floor on Juvi which looked painful. There are some moves that are going to hurt no matter what you do, this one included. Like 40 seconds later the Juvi Driver and 450 ends it. The Flock comes in and destroys him for no apparent reason.

Rating: C-. Just didn’t get enough time to really do anything. These two could be completely awesome but they didn’t get the chance to. I don’t get the Flock thing but I’d assume a one off match that never meant anything past like the following week. The back splash spot was cool though.

Goldberg’s 75th win was over Raven for the US Title.

We hear about a PPL show, as in Pay Per Listen. You can’t see it, but you can listen to the commentary for like $10. That’s not a horrible idea actually.

Video about the celebrity tag match on Sunday. There is way too much happening on this show. This is proof that three hours is WAY too long for one show.

The Giant vs. Jim Duggan

See what I mean about the three hour deal? This is the kind of stuff you get when it’s this long. Giant does a hip swivel in the corner but misses. Chokeslam ends it in like 90 seconds. Again, no point to this other than to fill in time. Giant says the football player he’s fighting on Sunday is pathetic. Oh ok it was supposed to be a tag match but they’re changing it to a singles match because of Goldberg. Not said here of course but you get the idea. Greene, the football player that no one cared about, comes out and spits at Giant.

Malone says he’ll get Rodman on Sunday.

Diamond Dallas Page vs. Jim Neidhart

See what I watch for you guys? Page is in jeans as usual and brings out Malone with him. Two more minutes, one more Diamond Cutter, match over.

Goldberg’s 100th win is over Konnan in a nothing match at Great American Bash.

Sting/Lex Luger vs. Sick Boy/Kidman

Flock vs. Wolfpack here which shouldn’t be much of anything. Yeah 7 months after the biggest match ever in WCW, Sting is smiling and laughing and in the NWO which he swore he would destroy. Don’t you love WCW? Nash, the leader, says nothing at all. Neither does Konnan. Apparently no one knew the opponents as Kidman and Sick Boy are surprising for some reason. Less than a minute, Luger with the Rack. In the Dining Room. And Colonel Mustard with the Revolver.

WCW World Title: Goldberg vs. Hulk Hogan

Immediately you can see why the match with Hall was a bad idea as the pop is solid but nowhere near what it should be. The fans have already seen him once tonight so the excitement is limited. Hogan gets booed out of the building. Naturally we’re 6-7 months removed from Starrcade and Hogan has the belt again. He’s held it since late April so for about two and a half months. Sting’s reign was like two months or so. After the match tonight, Hogan would have it AGAIN in less than 6 months, which we’ll get to later.

The bell gets a pop. This is one of the hottest crowds I can ever remember as the people are salivating over everything. In a funny line, Tenay says WCW is the third biggest wrestling company on the planet. This stuns me, until he says “after the two NWO factions.” So in other words, 6 months after Starrcade, not only does Hogan have the belt again but there are TWO NWOs instead of the original one being gone. And you wonder why they went out of business.

Just basic power stuff here to start as they’re feeling each other out a lot to start. Hogan takes over with some punches and whips Goldberg with his weight belt. Goldberg gets a full nelson but takes a low blow. There’s a great energy here which is making this awesome. Hogan takes a clothesline and the place POPS. The match itself is pretty bad but much like Hogan/Andre, that’s not the point.

We hit the floor and Hogan gets a chair shot in but there’s no DQ called. There’s the chant and the legdrop is treated like any other move. Hogan hits two of them and here’s Curt Hennig. THREE legdrops gets a two count as Malone pops up to hit a Diamond Cutter on Hennig. Goldberg more or less no sells the leg drops and spears the heck out of Hogan. Heenan is LOSING it here. Jackhammer hits and the place goes NUTS. Goldberg is the world champion, and the image of him standing on the stage holding up both his titles is very cool.

Rating: A+. Like I said in the Hogan vs. Andre at Mania 3 review, this wasn’t about the match in the ring and if you think it was you’re an idiot and don’t get wrestling. Goldberg looked awesome here and Hogan put him over 100% clean. That was the key thing here: Goldberg didn’t have to have some screwy way to win the title. He hit his two big moves and pinned Hogan after kicking out of the legdrop. This is how you put someone over and amazingly enough, Hogan never got this one back, even though this was the plan. Hogan had made a deal that he got to beat Goldberg when the time was right, which is more nonsense but at least they would get this one night. The payback would evolve into the Fingerpoke of Doom, which we’ll get too soon enough.

Overall Rating
: C+. The main event aside, this just wasn’t interesting at all. Three hours was just too much for the TV shows as you get stuff like Duggan vs. Giant which does nothing at all and the minute long squashes just to fill time with the entrances and such. Once they went to three hours they dug their own graves because the first hour was never good enough to get people to stick around so they put their good stuff in the first hour and then the other two hours sucked and people watched Raw. WCW was dead and didn’t know it yet though, especially given the stupidity that they would bring out later on. Good show, but only because of the amazing moment at the end.

Again though, as great of a moment as it was, there is very little gained for it since there was nothing to follow it up with since they blew everything here. Goldberg’s win got them one big victory in the ratings, but it didn’t make much money when it could have made millions. That’s simply bad business and being shortsighted, which is never a good thing.
Also the handling of Goldberg was just awful because do you remember his first title match? It was the following Sunday against Hennig and went less than 4 minutes. He wouldn’t have a serious challenge until DDP in October and then would lose the belt to Nash in the idiocy that was Starrcade 98. This was a great moment, but that’s all it was. It’s a single moment that meant nothing after it because WCW is freaking stupid. This had FOUR DAYS of buildup. See why it made no money and could have made a much higher rating if done right? Great moment, but I don’t see how WCW is responsible for much of it, which is their eventual downfall.




Starrcade 1997 – The Death of WCW

Starrcade 1997
Date: December 28, 1997
Location: MCI Center, Washington, D.C.
Attendance: 17,500
Commentators: Eric Bischoff, Dusty Rhodes, Mike Tenay

This is a show that I’ve wanted to do for a very long time so instead of just sitting around waiting to get there, I’m doing it because I feel like it. I’ve long since argued and I’ll forever argue that this is the show that ultimately ended WCW. At this point, WWF had nothing on WCW and everyone knew it. Austin was fast on the rise, but no one was watching.

For 18 months WCW had built up to this one show. The NWO had dominated and in particular Hogan had been virtually unbeatable. Tonight was WCW’s night. Tonight was WCW’s chance for revenge as they would win back everything and Sting would make his long awaited return to the ring and win the world title from Hogan. Let’s get to how they managed to blow the biggest lead in wrestling history and allow themselves to be mortally wounded to the point where they could never recover.

Also, this is going to be commentary heavy, so if you’re not a fan of me going on rants and putting a lot of my opinion into things, you might not want to read this one.

Just to give you a bit of backstory and context here, WCW was at its absolute peak. This show drew a 1.9 buyrate, which is completely insane for PPV of any kind. They had come up with a second show called Thunder which would debut in I think eleven days, a year and 8 months before Smackdown became a regular show. Nitro also hadn’t lost in the ratings for a little over a year at this point, so to say WCW was dominating would be an understatement.

The opening video is one of my all time favorites as we see shadows of Hogan’s dominance and then Sting watching down at him the entire time. Sting rises up but you can barely see him as he’s all covered in rain and shadows. They’re in the ruins of some building which I guess could be used as an allegory for WCW being ruined but then again I might be looking too much into this. The arena looks great and Tony’s hype is absolutely right here. He claims over 24,000 people but I can’t find an estimate over 18,000. We immediately hear about the referee being a controversy, which should make everyone realize that this isn’t going to end well.

A bunch of WCW guys are in the audience to see the show. I like that actually. It also does well to show us who isn’t good enough to get on the biggest show of the year, such as Rey, Harlem Heat and Disco Inferno. Dusty goes on a rant about horses or something but gets cut off. Oh and Kevin Nash isn’t here for the 2nd biggest match on the card. No reason was ever given other than he didn’t want to lose so he didn’t show up. He was never punished or anything and the match just isn’t going to happen.

Cruiserweight Title: Dean Malenko vs. Eddie Guerrero

Dean is VERY popular here and was just totally awesome at this point having won the fan poll this year as the best wrestler in the world. That’s saying a lot. This is the first event at the arena which is brand new. This should be awesome. This feels like a huge show like it should. Crowd is WHITE hot too. Surprisingly enough Dean starts by just throwing punches and Eddie is in trouble early on. The crowd is all over Eddie and once he gets powerbombed the fans cheer so loudly you can’t hear Dusty.

I can’t get over these fans being this hot. They’re cheering for very basic stuff. That’s a very great sign as we have a standoff between the two guys. Dean dominates and sends Eddie to the outside. Tony: “Eddie being on the outside like this makes me think of the Outsiders and how Kevin Nash isn’t here tonight.” WOW. That’s the kind of commentary I have to deal with here. It was like that for about three years straight.

Mike suggests that working on Malenko’s legs would negate the Cloverleaf. Wouldn’t that be the arms actually? Tony goes back to Nash and Hogan/Sting just to make sure we don’t leave during the PPV I guess. I’ve always hated this. The fans chant USA for two American guys. I guess they like them both. Dean launches Eddie WAY into the air, prompting Dusty to stop talking about the Hogan/Sting referee for a full half second. Eddie kisses Dean’s foot to prevent being beaten so he gets a dropkick for his efforts.

Dean wins a test of strength and gets Eddie’s hands all the way to the mat and then stomps on him. Then he kicks Eddie in the face. I love that move. When all else fails, KICK THEM IN THE FREAKING FACE! Eddie gets it to the floor and works on Dean’s knee with the post and the steps. He gets a nice powerbomb as we continue to ignore the action in the ring which is a good match so far.

Both guys go for top rope moves at the same time in a weird spot but neither gets it. Dean has a sweet powerbomb. Cloverleak is blocked because of the bad knee. A missile dropkick to the knee sets up the Frog Splash onto the knee for the pin to retain. Sweet blessed psychology there but uh, yeah the crowd being white hot for Malenko should have been a hint for that. Great match though.

Rating: A-. GREAT match here as there was psychology throughout and both guys worked very hard out there. Dean was nothing short of divine in 97 and this was a great way to cap off the year, even though e didn’t get the title. These two never were able to have a bad match and this was one of their better ones ever. I loved this and would love to see more of them fighting.

Oddly enough I can’t find a review of this that’s anywhere above average. Really? I loved it.

And here’s Scott Hall. He has a tag title belt on him but the Steiners are the champions at this point I believe. Ah yes they were. Hall says that they’re taking a survey and the crowd is NWO so of course Tony says it was WCW. Hall says that Nash isn’t here tonight and that we need a referee so that Giant can be declared the winner.

Giant of course comes up behind him and (wearing a ponytail of all things) says Nash can’t run forever and he’ll get his chance eventually. That’s true as he would get his match the next month and Nash would botch a jackknife on him and mess up his neck for awhile. Hall punches him a bit and then gets his head kicked in for his trouble. Giant Jackknifes him and leaves. Yeah this wasn’t a match for some reason. No reason was ever given for it but whatever.

So the real story is that Giant was supposed to go over Nash and Nash kept saying there was no way he’d do it. On the day of the show he called up and said he was having a heart attack. Everyone laughed when they heard the news. What does that tell you about this? Naturally he was fine the next night and was never punished. Things like that are what hurt WCW later as there was no discipline at all and no one cared.

Vincent/Scott Norton/Konnan Vs. Steiner Brothers/Ray Traylor

There’s no Konnan for some reason. The Steiners are the tag champions and managed by DiBiase. Traylor was the first guy the NWO had jumped so he later joined them. They threw him out and he had been trying to get revenge since. Scott would join the NWO in like two months anyway so this didn’t mean much. The replacement is Randy Savage, making the ending of this pretty obvious.

His entrance takes forever as he gets in an argument with the WCW guys who are taking up front row seats all over the ringside area. Randy vs. Scott Steiner start us off which would be a dream match three years later. And hey we stall some more. Savage lays on the rope as we’ve had a tie up over the course of the first two minutes here. Oh look it’s Vincent on the biggest show of the year.

Norton hits a Samoan Drop on the other Scott as Steiner is getting dominated here. The faces send them running and the NWO is in trouble. Rick vs. Norton gives us something interesting as the power of Norton is pretty awesome. And now we have Vincent vs. Big Boss Man on the biggest show of 1997. Why am I watching this again? Scott comes in and I get to see the spinning belly to belly that I use on No Mercy and Wrestlemania 2000. The crowd is virtually dead here by the way.

We hear about how great Vincent is as I shake my head at how much they push these jobbers at times. There is no heat for this match at all, meaning of course they give it even more time than they should have. Rick comes in off the should be hot tag to clean some trailer. Vincent takes their top rope DDT to end….nothing. Oh I don’t like where this is going.

Frankensteiner continues his slaughtering but Savage makes the save. Scott destroys the NWO as his singles push continues. Norton grabs him and hits an electric chair so Savage can hit the elbow to an ERUPTION to give the NWO the lead so far. So yeah the tag champions jobbed to Vincent and Scott Norton. That’s ok though as it was a six man so him getting pinned clean means nothing right?

Rating: D. Oh this was boring. Vincent and Scott Norton got the majority of the heel ring time and it was all downhill from there. This was an awful match and nothing ever came from it at all. The Steiners jobbing is DUMB as it’s not like the heels gain anything from winning. So in other words we’re over fifty minutes into this show and the high point for the faces is a chokeslam on a replacement in a non-match.

James J. Dillon, the commissioner or whatever comes out and announces Nick Patrick as the referee. And there ends WCW’s run on top, but we’ll get to that later on. Gene says String returns tonight as we’re in arts and crafts class now I suppose.

Bill Goldberg vs. Steve McMichael

Goldberg is a heel here and means nothing at all. He has the music and the finishers but other than that he’s got nothing. Anyone he beats at this point is pretty much a surprise here, but in less than seven months a lot would change as he would beat Hogan for the title. This feud is over a Super Bowl Ring I think. They go at it in the aisle and the fans love it. Ok just stretch with me on this one.

In a slightly funny moment Goldberg just lifts him up and carries him to the ring. Hey we have a bell! There’s a table set up at ringside. Sweet goodness Mongo was terrible. We hear the football careers and Dusty of course insists Mongo is better and that the SEC isn’t real football. Oh that’s amusing. Goldberg gets a leg lock and sweet goodness Mongo is awful at selling at this point.

Some fans seem to get into a fight at ringside which is the more interesting thing here. Spear hits but means nothing at this point. Goldberg sets a table at ringside which goes nowhere so far. The more famous of these two busts out a decent dropkick and Mongo is in trouble again. He goes through the table in something completely boring and uneventful.

There’s that ECW chant again. Tombstone doesn’t work because of his back hurting and the Jackhammer ends it. Hey we’re only an hour in so far without a face winning. That doesn’t mean anything as the main events are all that matter right? It’s still amazing to think what Goldberg would become in just a few months.

Rating: D. Another boring match here as Mongo was just AWFUL. He never did get any good and rightfully became the jobber that he should have been. His career was about over at this point and no one cared. He was put into the college football hall of fame recently so to get as far as he did is saying something I guess, although I’m not sure if it’s a good thing or a bad thing.

Raven is here for his match vs. Benoit.

Chris Benoit vs. Raven

Raven has been ducking Benoit forever and this is where they finally have their showdown. Raven says he’s not wrestling tonight so Saturn is taking his place. That’s false advertisement number two.

Perry Saturn vs. Chris Benoit

And the Radicalz explode AGAIN! Saturn is just a tough guy here and more or less completely insane. I love that simple vest Benoit wore. That was always awesome. Benoit gets a mic and…..yeah he should go with the silent but violent thing. This is under Raven’s Rules so more or less anything goes here. Saturn has some hair here and to say it looks weird is an understatement.

The Flock comes over the railing and that goes nowhere at all. Even Sick Boy (how awesome of a name is that) is here. Kidman throws in a Shooting Star to put Benoit in trouble. Saturn mostly hits a nice moonsault and it’s all the less famous one. The genius fans chant USA. Maybe they just like Saturn better? The fans look up at something else which has to be a record for the most times in such a little span of time.

Dang Raven looks like garbage. I think that’s just how he always looks. We hit the floor and Benoit gets a Crossface out of nowhere but the Flock jumps him. It’s Raven’s Rules though so this is all fine and dandy. HUGE diving headbutt hits and the Flock runs in again. Raven comes in but more interference causes Benoit to take a DDT. Rings of Saturn and it’s over. Benoit vs. Raven would be at Souled Out and would be a solid brawl.

Rating: C-. Kind of slow but the violence helped it a lot here. This was more to set up Benoit vs. Raven….which should have happened here at the BIGGEST SHOW OF THE YEAR but whatever. This was something that happened more than once I thought so of course we just do it again at the equivalent of Mania. This was a decent enough match though.

Buff Bagwell vs. Lex Luger

This is more or less a grudge match and remember that Luger was WORLD CHAMPION four months ago. Bagwell has beaten him three times in a row apparently. So you remember that white hot crowd that you could have fried an egg on to start the show? It’s long gone and has been placed by this….whatever. Tony reminds us that Luger was world champion earlier this year.

Bagwell’s facial hair looks like it’s painted on. Bret Hart gets his SECOND reference of the night so far as he’s the former WWF Champion (Montreal was maybe 6 weeks before this) and he’s a referee tonight. Yeah….no room on the card for him when we have VINCENT BABY! We begin making Montreal allusions which should be a telling sign.

Luger beats him up for awhile and puts him on the floor. Bagwell gets Vincent to come back down as we get our second appearance by this guy which is about two too many. He gets rammed into the post and doesn’t come within a foot of it. Wow that looked awful. We talk about Sting vs. Hogan for the 983rd time so far just to mix things up a bit. More interference causes Bagwell to take over again.

By the way we are now an hour and a half into this show and no face has won all night and the NWO is undefeated so far. We hit the chinlock just to waste some time. When I say some time that apparently means about three straight minutes. Make that five minutes. My goodness I know these guys aren’t the best in the world but this is ridiculous.

Luger makes his standard comeback and calls for the Rack. Instead of course he hits an atomic drop. Vincent comes in again but Luger beats the heck out of him. Bagwell rams Luger into the referee and say it with me: there’s no referee for the Rack. Savage runs in and gets racked too. Now Norton runs out and hits Luger with a chain and Bagwell gets the pin.

There’s an hour to go in this tape and the NWO is undefeated and the faces haven’t won a single match. There would be a rematch the next night where Luger would freaking massacre him. That of course couldn’t happen here though. Finally, THIS is the longest match of the show at just under 17 minutes. Liz comes down to check on Savage.

Rating: F+. Buff Bagwell vs. Lex Luger went 17 minutes. Add in the idiotic booking and too much Vincent and of course this is awful on a stick. Just a boring match too with a 5 minute chinlock. This was supposed to be Buff’s big match to make him a big deal, but taking three guys and getting crushed the next night kind of makes that pointless so whatever.

US Title: Curt Hennig vs. Diamond Dallas Page

Hennig turned NWO at Fall Brawl after slamming Flair’s head in a cage door. Everyone has wanted to kill him since. He had been DDP’s mystery partner at a PPV and had kind of turned on him there too. Page stole the belt last night but had to give it back off camera, making that entirely pointless too. Page is ridiculously popular here and possibly the second biggest face in the company. He’s also a lot better in the ring now too after a ton of practice and a great series with Savage earlier in the year.

Page gets a rollup like 4 seconds in for two. Page dominates early as Hennig runs. We’re told DDP has never held a major title, meaning the TV Title means nothing and must be a minor title. I’ve always wanted one of those. Page likes headlocks a lot. Dusty suggests starting the Sting World Order. Oh my head hurts. Dusty: “I haven’t seen any titles change hands on the outside. Except where falls count anywhere.”

The fans chant USA, likely because their boredom has brought them to that point. We hit a chinlock and the fans decide this is boring. I can’t say I disagree here at all either. Page hits a plancha after a lot of punches. We’re going into the crowd which actually cares a bit here after nearly 2 hours. Diamond Cutter is blocked and the fans are cheering for it like Orton gets cheered for the RKO.

We do a bunch of near falls for no apparent reason which gets us nowhere. And out of nowhere the Diamond Cutter ends this. With 45 minutes left in the show, WCW wins its first match and the faces win their first match. The fans pop loudly for it, but the ending came a bit flat.

Rating: D+. Not great but again this could have been SO much better. For one thing, the match should have been Flair and not DDP. There were a lot of dead spots here and those are what really bring this one down. DDP would hold the title for about four months so at least he got a solid reign out of it. I still can’t get over how long it’s taken to get a win for the fans here.

Bret Hart is here. There’s no pyro, no special entrance, no special announcement, no anything like that. He just showed up and is the referee for the next match. I can’t imagine a lot of people will ever get what they were thinking with Bret.

Eric Bischoff vs. Larry Zbyszko

If Eric wins, the NWO gets Nitro and if Larry wins he gets Hall at Souled Out. Eric booked himself into the second main event at the biggest show of the year. There was an NWO Nitro on Monday where the show just went down the drain as it took about 20 minutes to set up the NWO stage. The ratings switched incredibly fast and it was great.

Larry gets a nice pop and comes out to the Nitro theme. This match was reaired for free on the debut Thunder so I’ve done it before but in a different context. Ok so the show has been horrible so far other than the opener but we have 40 minutes left and the two matches that mean anything to go. For the final rating I’m going to put next to zero stock in the first match as the final match is probably about 99% of this show’s importance and value.

Bret even checks them both for hidden objects. Fans are ENTIRELY behind Larry here. Larry looks in decent shape and had just turned 44 earlier in the month. They even call this mixed martial arts. Oh give me a break. Bischoff, a karate guy, keeps trying to land kicks and Larry keeps trying to grab him so at least they’re playing to their own strengths.

I can’t believe Bret Hart is refereeing this 6 weeks after being WWF Champion. Eric gets a kick and down goes Larry for a second or so. Larry just goes off on him and takes him down so Bret pulls him off. Bret breaks up another one as we enter Bill Alfonso in 95 territory. Bret is following the rules to perfection but the fact that he’s doing so is making people think something is up. It’s amazing how basic stuff like that can be. It made Fonzie the most hated man in ECW history. What does that tell you?

Tony declares Bret NWO and uses the word tweener. Eric gets a kick in and Larry is in trouble. Bischoff just unloads on Larry with everything he’s got and Larry covers up. It’s Rope-A-Dope time as Eric is just spent and Larry just stands up. As my dear old Aunt Petunia used to say, IT’S CLOBBERIN TIME! He hooks Eric up in the Tree of Woe, and then things just completely fall apart.

Bret pulls Larry back and is LOOKING AT ERIC in the corner. Hall loads up Eric’s boot with a piece of metal. Bischoff throws a kick at Larry and the metal flies out in mid kick. The kick hits Larry barely on the arm and Bret looks at the metal object as it flies out of the shoe. Larry of course sells like he’s been shot and just lays there while Bischoff celebrates. Eric turns to Bret to celebrate and gets popped in the jaw for his troubles, securing Bret as being WCW and getting the fans to cheer for the first time in a good while.

Hall gets beaten up and down by taking a Sharpshooter. Seriously, WHY IS BRET NOT WRESTLING HERE? You couldn’t throw him out there in a squash match at least? Larry chokes out Bischoff with a belt or something and Bret raises his hand as the winner, I guess by DQ for the foot thing? Tony and Tenay talk about how they can have Nitro because WCW wins this match. Yeah that’s why they spent over two hours talking about how important this match was.

Rating: F. The best move of this was a terrible vertical suplex. Larry did what he could, but there’s a reason why Bischoff shouldn’t have been in this: HE ISN’T A WRESTLER. This is fine for something like Nitro, but think about this for a minute. This is Starrcade and it’s the next to last match. At Mania 17 this would have been Taker vs. HHH. At the 89 Bash this was a War Games match. And this is a guy that’s been retired about 4 years vs. an announcer. Like I said, Larry tried but there was too much to overcome here. Just a freaking joke.

And here we are. To put it mildly, this show has been horrible so far. Nothing has made sense and the fans are rightfully ticked off about things. There has been one good match and one match with logical booking (US Title). However, literally none of that matters at this point as this upcoming match is at least 95% of the value of this show. Think Mania 6 and the main event. Nothing else on the card mattered and nothing else here does either. This show is about Sting vs. Hogan and nothing more.

Given that this is the biggest match in WCW history, some backstory might help a bit. Granted WCW doesn’t think you need it but since the entire planet was watching this show in their eyes I guess that makes sense. Back in the fall of 1996, the NWO was running rampant. Sting was on a tour of Japan and therefore wasn’t at Nitro that night. Luger fought I think Hall to the parking lot where “Sting”, a guy in a Sting costume, popped out and beat him up.

That following Sunday was Fall Brawl and WCW vs. NWO in War Games. None of his teammates believed it wasn’t him, despite him being about 4 inches shorter than the real Sting. This was more or less a running joke in WCW as there were all kinds of people impersonating Sting including Hogan and Nash and only the announcers would buy into it as the fans could tell by, you know, LOOKING AT HIM.

Anyway, the Fake Sting came in and then the real Sting came in and beat up the NWO on his own. He looked at his best friend, Lex Luger, and asked if that was good enough and walked away. He then cut a promo the next night with his back to the camera, saying he wasn’t sure what he was doing anymore and that he would be popping up every now and then.

The next week the crow Sting debuted and he would begin hiding in the rafters. He would beat up random people as WCW would swear up and down that he was in the NWO. He also started carrying the ball bat and he would hand it to random guys and turn away from them. It was some kind of test for trust or something like that. Anyway, we hit Uncensored 97 and there’s no answer as to which side he’s on.

After the NWO wins the main event, Sting repels from the ceiling and beats the tar out of them, which of course makes the WCW announcers sure that he’s WCW now. Over the next 9 months or so he stalked Hogan while Dillon kept trying to get him signed to a contract, which you would assume he was already under but whatever. He turned down matches with Hennig and X-Pac before being given an ultimatum of pick an opponent or leave.

He gets in the ring and the fans chant for Hogan. Sting points at the crowd and of course Dillon doesn’t get it. The following Thursday at Clash of the Champions, the lights go out and Sting is in the rafters with a crow. The voice of a child comes over the PA system and says stuff about how the battle is just beginning and Sting is the light in the darkness. This somehow gets Dillon’s attention and he makes the match.

Keep in mind that this whole time Hogan has been running scared, screaming at the sight of Sting and never landing a single shot on him. On the last Nitro before this they got to him and beat him up but it didn’t really do anything. So the point of this is that Hogan, surrounded by goons including guys the caliber of Hall and Nash has been scared to death of Sting for about 9 months minimum.

One more thing and then I promise we’ll get to this mess. This was supposed to be about revenge. Other than a 6 day reign by Luger in August which I guess was a marketing ploy to get more buys for Road Wild, Hogan has held the title non-stop since August of 96. The NWO and especially Hogan has dominated the whole time and it hasn’t been close at all. Tonight is about revenge. It’s time for WCW to rise up and take back what is theirs. This is the night where WCW gets their big win over the NWO and makes them realize their days are numbered. In short, this is supposed to be the beginning of the end for the NWO with Sting leading the WCW charge. This should have been screwupable. Let’s see how they managed to screw it up.

WCW World Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Sting

This is the one match we’ve never gotten: the biggest WCW star vs. the biggest WWF star. Here’s how this SHOULD have gone:

Hogan won’t come out. He locks himself in his dressing room or whatever and just won’t fight. WCW guys kick the door in and literally drag him kicking and screaming to the ring. He tries to run and the Giant and Luger carry him back to the ring and they stand guard of him until Sting gets there. The bell rings, Hogan MIGHT get a punch or two in and Sting just beats the heck out of him for about 3 minutes, Stinger Splash, Scorpion Death Lock, new champion, we’re out in 5 minutes. THAT’S IT.

Seriously, after 9 months of running and hiding, Hogan should have been scared to death of Sting right? He was scared with no help and he should be scared with help. Add in the fact that Hogan has been a cowardly heel for about 99% of his run and this should have been a walk in the park for WCW. And that’s how you know it’s going to be screwed up: it’s WCW.

Hogan’s music hits, Michael Buffer does the intro, and the whole thing is instantly ruined. After 9 months of running and hiding and screaming at the sight of Sting, Hogan is strutting down the aisle. He’s singing the words to his theme song and playing the belt like a guitar. He might as well be fighting the Brooklyn Brawler tonight on a house show in front of 900 people in East Orange, New Jersey.

And now, the entrance of Sting. He’s come through the crowd, he’s repelled from the rafters, and he had a helicopter drop him from the sky. What more could he do this time? Buffer simply says “Ladies and Gentlemen, the challenger.” The same speech from the Clash plays….and Hogan is walking around the ring with his arms in the air so as to make sure the attention never leaves him for one second.

Yeah this is already damaged but there’s still the match itself right? Thunder and lightning hit, the music is loud, the crowd is on fire, and Sting walks through the entrance like anyone else would. They do the effect where Hogan is kind of superimposed over Sting. This would be a much more effective shot if Hogan was scared or something like he was supposed to be but he’s saying bring it on. Sure why not.

We get the staredown which is indeed cool. AND IT’S ON! Hogan immediately shoves him and throws the bandana in his face. I immediately don’t like where this is going as he’s showing more life than he did vs. Andre. The fans pop like cherries for a slap from Sting. Hogan stalls to make sure the crowd remembers who put them in their seats is. This is already bad and we’re 40 seconds in.

Hogan shoves him back into the corner but Sting hits a punch. The place ERUPTS. Remember that Sting is known for his jumping all over the place and speed and power etc. So far he’s slapped and punched. Hogan punches him and Sting goes flying. ALL Hogan here as Sting looks pathetic. Hogan dedicates a punch to his son and isn’t even sweating yet. Crowd has been mostly killed by this point, about three minutes in.

Sting hits an ok dropkick and Hogan goes to the floor. Yeah that’s his big offense so far. He doesn’t go after Hogan or anything. He just stares at him even more. Hogan hooks a headlock and then puts Sting down with a shoulder block. Tony says he ran through Sting and he’s absolutely right. More dropkicks and down goes Hogan again. And as soon as Sting goes on offense again, Hogan hits the floor and stalls even more to kill the crowd every time Sting gets something going.

Now Sting uses a headlock. HE’S SO ENRAGED! Hogan has dominated almost the whole match other than those dropkicks and Sting is down again. So far this has been like a seven minute intro match with nothing at all of note. Hogan has dominated for the most part and the biggest move and most impactful move by far have been dropkicks. Other than that there just isn’t anything but punches and headlocks.

We REALLY crank things up with a suplex which is no sold. Sting comes back with a crotch chop of pain and his offense lasts a total of 9 seconds since Hogan takes over again. Sting is looking like a total jobber here, getting nothing in longer than maybe 20 seconds. He’s controlled less than half a minute and we’re about 9 minutes into this. Hogan punches the heck out of him as the crowd is virtually dead.

Stinger Splash of course misses on the floor. That could have gotten the fans to cheer so we couldn’t have that of course right? With Sting more or less out on his feet, there’s the big boot and legdrop. As he’s in the air, Bret Hart walks by the front of the ring. Keep that in mind. Patrick does a semi-fast count for the clean pin. Hart keeps the bell from ringing and shouts at Patrick and half into the microphone that he won’t let it happen again. He hits Patrick, throws Hogan back into the ring, the NWO runs in and gets beaten up, Splash and Scorpion ends the match and Sting wins the title. The WCW guys run in for the massive celebration and we end the show.

Now the fun part: explaining why this was freaking horrendous.

For those of you that haven’t heard the history, here was the new plan that for some reason that I’m not sure God himself understands. Nick Patrick, the referee, had been very biased towards the NWO in the recent months. He was supposed to make a fast count, leading to Bret Hart running down and saying he wouldn’t let this become Montreal all over again (not in those words but that was the idea). Two things caused this mess of a plan to fall apart: Patrick counts a relatively normal count, and Hart is there before the bell rings. With Patrick counting normal speed, it looks like Sting just got pinned in a normal match.

Another problem with the whole fast count thing: Sting stayed down. You can see him getting up about 20 seconds later when Bret is arguing with Patrick. If this was supposed to be a fast count then Sting should have popped up a split second after the three correct? Instead he popped up almost half a minute later and looked like he could barely get up if his life depended on it. If this was supposed to be a fast count, why did no one tell Sting that was the finish? Could it be that he knew it would bomb?

The announcers don’t bring up Patrick’s heel tactics, and they touch on it being a fast count. They don’t have time because instead of Hart running down to the ring like he was supposed to, he was already there, so he stops the bell from ringing about two seconds after the pin. He says it won’t happen again, which makes no sense to non-WWF fans, or to wrestling fans in general. Since he was a referee earlier in the night, he is apparently has refereeing powers all night, so he jumps in as referee. Sting hits the splash, the scorpion, and he gets the title to end the show. Two weeks later, the title is held up vacant, and Sting FINALLY pins Hogan mostly clean in LATE FEBRUARY (this was three days after Christmas) at Superbrawl.

The whole thing just made no sense and everyone saw that it was nothing but a way to get the buyrate for Superbrawl up. Hogan and the NWO should have died then and there. Hogan should have disappeared until about June before coming back in the red and yellow, begging for the fans’ forgiveness while Sting slowly accepts the fans again and becomes the surfer or at least a normal looking wrestler. Instead, it’s the same things over and over again. All the fans, myself included, had their intelligence insulted. I and many other fans I knew at the time started watching Raw and loved what we were seeing, because it wasn’t WCW. I never left.

Sting would wind up holding the title for about two months until Savage beat him for it at Spring Stampede, only to lose it back to Hogan the next night. Goldberg beat him for it three months later. To say the fans didn’t react well is an understatement. The next night on Nitro the ratings were GREAT. The lead for Nitro stayed intact until the fans started getting what was going on.

Once the fans were told the title would be held up, they started to watch Raw more often. You couple this with the introduction of Mike Tyson and Steve Austin getting the world title and the lead was gone. About a week after Mania, Raw won for the first time in nearly two years. While the content on Raw was a major factor in this, there was no reason for WCW fans to watch Raw until they got screwed over here.

Sting had been this hero for WCW and would end the NWO once and for all. That was supposed to happen, much like Austin winning the title at Mania. Sting was supposed to destroy Hogan but that just didn’t happen for some reason. That reason would be Hogan didn’t want to lose clean like that and when he got the title back just a few months later, everything fell apart. WCW proved they had learned nothing a little over a year later in the Fingerpoke of Doom. The fans wanted something new and WCW decided that wasn’t going to happen. The rest is history.

Rating: F. For managing to screw up something that should be as unscrewable as a nun.

Overall Rating: F. This was just a pure failure all around. There was a very simple idea here: WCW and the fans win. That’s it. That’s what this show is supposed to be and they managed to mess it up. There are 8 matches on this card. A face won three of them. One had a clean ending, one was never announced to be a DQ as Larry was just declared the winner while the biggest acquisition in wrestling was the referee and the last one was the debacle of Hogan/Sting where Hogan just had to dominate the whole thing and make Sting look like a jobber that stole a win because he got destroyed by Hogan clean as a sheet. This was just a disaster all around and still the thing that caused them to begin to die.