Summerslam 2006
Date: August 20, 2006
Location: TD Banknorth Garden, Boston, Massachusetts
Attendance: 16,168
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz, Joey Styles, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re finally here and just like all the other times I’ve seen this show, it still doesn’t feel all that big. Nothing on the card really stands out above the rest as some major match, but instead we are getting a bunch of important matches at once. That isn’t a bad thing, but it did make for kind of an odd setup. Let’s get to it.

The opening video talks about the history of the show….and then the DX logo pops up as we talk about DX vs. the McMahons, followed by everything else.

Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero

They’re fighting over Eddie Guerrero’s memory, so we look at both videos from Smackdown, focusing on both of their relationships with them. So yes, it does come off as a pay per view match based on people arguing over who was Eddie’s real best friend. This is also Chavo’s return from retirement, despite the fact that he was on almost every TV show since retiring. Rey hammers away to start fast as JBL goes on a rant about the Guerrero family as only he can.

Chavo tries a shoulder breaker but gets sent outside, where he manages to avoid Rey’s dive. Chavo’s dive connects and it’s time to choke away back in to the corner. Rey comes back out of another corner and kicks away at the leg, only to be sent head first into the buckle. The fans chant for Eddie as Rey is knocked outside but comes back up top, right next to Chavo. They both hit a big facebuster back to the mat and it’s a bit of a breather. Rey is back up with a kick to the head and there’s the 619.

Chavo counters the seated senton though, meaning Rey has to hurricanrana him over the top for a double crash to the floor. Cue Vickie Guerrero to yell at Chavo and slap him in the face. Rey takes him down with a dive and they head back inside to exchange Three Amigos each. It’s Rey going up top but Vickie crotches him down, allowing Chavo to hit a brainbuster. The frog splash finishes Rey off.

Rating: C+. The match was good, as you would expect from these two, but egads the battle of these two over Eddie’s memory was hard to watch. I know it’s the logical way to go, but at the same time it feels like it’s being designed to set up some big Eddie return, which doesn’t seem that likely. I’m sure we’ll be seeing more of these two together and hopefully that does not include hearing Eddie’s name every fourth word.

Queen Sharmell and King Booker are ready to face Batista but here are Edge and Lita to interrupt. They argue over who is the most powerful couple, with Booker calling him a squire. The champs make a bet: if Edge loses his title, he has to kiss Booker’s feet but if Booker loses his title, Booker he has to be Edge’s servant. I’m still not sure if these champion vs. champion scenes matter quite as much as WWE thinks they do.

ECW World Title: Big Show vs. Sabu

Big Show is defending under ECW Rules. Sabu chairs him down to start and hits a quick Arabian facebuster for two. Show isn’t having that and knocks both Sabu and the chair down. The bearhug goes on for a few seconds, followed by a fall away slam to send Sabu flying. Sabu finds another chair though and knocks Show silly, followed by a top rope chair shot to do it again. It’s table time, but first Sabu hits a top rope bulldog. Sabu drives him through the table in the corner but Show is right back up to run him over.

A Vader Bomb connects, with Sabu rolling outside as Show grabs the steps. Two sets of steps are thrown in and a table is bridged between them. Sabu uses the breather to climb onto the table, which falls down, then reset it and DDT show through it for….well nothing as he doesn’t bother to cover. Instead, Sabu sets up another table and is quickly chokeslammed through it to retain Show’s title.

Rating: C. They did what they had to do well enough here, as they didn’t stay out there too long and had Sabu use all of his weapons to cover up all of the issues. I’m not sure how much of a doubt there was about who was leaving as champion, but now I’m curious to see who is next for Sabu. This could have been much worse so I’ll call that a win.

We look at Layla winning the Diva Search.

Layla comes into the locker room where some of the women brag about her cover on a magazine. Trish Stratus goes on a rant about what everyone else had to do to get here. But it’s ok because Layla is one of them now. Then they take her into the shower and soak her for her initiation. I know the idea of a bunch of Divas in the shower is a simple concept, but it loses its steam when they are in their usual clothes.

We recap Hulk Hogan vs. Randy Orton. Legend meets Legend Killer, who was also hitting on the Legend’s daughter.

Randy Orton vs. Hulk Hogan

They lock up to start with Hogan shoving him down to hit the posing. Orton has some more luck with a headlock, but he gets shoved away again without much effort. Hogan powers out of another headlock and shoves Orton down again but this time Orton gets in a cheap shot and stomps away. You don’t try to ram him into the buckle though as Hogan blocks the shot and hammers away in the corner, as only he can. A thumb to the eye and more right hands set up a clothesline to keep Orton in trouble.

There are the back rakes as JR talks about Hogan’s heeling days in the AWA. Orton bails to the floor where he grabs Hogan’s knee and rams it into the apron. Back in and the circle stomp keeps Hogan in trouble but he ducks the high crossbody. The big boot misses though and Orton nails the dropkick. The RKO connects for three but Hogan’s foot is on the rope just in time. There’s the Hulk Up and the big boot into the legdrop finishes Orton.

Rating: D+. I’m always going to be a Hulkamaniac but what in the world was this? Hogan comes in, shrugs off almost everything Orton has, and wins in about eleven minutes? It’s a feel good moment and such but this serves Hogan and Hogan only, which makes me think he probably had a lot to do with the decision. Orton could have used this win and while it won’t destroy him, the loss doesn’t exactly feel like the smartest move. The match wasn’t even that good, as Hogan dominated for the first half, got beaten down for a bit and then went to the finish with some pretty limited drama.

Posing ensues post match.

Melina gives Mick Foley a pep talk but Mick is worried about the kind of mood Flair is in. She also doesn’t want Foley to lose and damage her reputation as the manager of champions. Foley is fired up too though and seems ready to go.

Mick Foley vs. Ric Flair

I Quit match so Foley brings in a trashcan full of weapons. Foley starts fast and hits the running knee in the corner. The Mandible Claw goes on about a minute in but Foley lets go to ask Flair if he quits. Since Flair can’t speak at the moment, Foley puts barbed wire around Mr. Socko, allowing Flair to grab him low. Flair puts on the barbed wire Socko and chops him out to the floor.

There’s the big whip into the steps but Foley grabs a barbed wire board to hack Flair up as well. The fans sound like they want fire as Foley chokes with a boot. There’s another barbed wire board shot to the face and then one to Flair’s back but he still won’t quit. Flair is COVERED in blood and Foley pouring out the thumbtacks isn’t going to make it better. Foley slams him onto the tacks but Flair still won’t quit, so let’s bring in a barbed wire baseball bat.

Thankfully Flair gets in a low blow and sends Foley shoulder first into the post. Flair hits Foley’s arm with the bat but Foley won’t quit, even with threats of Flair killing him. A big shot knocks Foley off the apron and into the Nestea Plunge, onto a trashcan for a cushion. The trainer comes out to say Foley can’t continue but Flair isn’t having that. Instead he throws Foley back inside, sending him right through the thumbtacks.

Flair goes for the eyes with the barbed wire bat as Melina is out here begging for mercy. The bat is driven into Foley’s face so Melina throws in the towel to quit for him. Flair kicks Foley low and demands that Foley be the one to quit. With nothing else working, Flair grabs the bat and goes for Melina, which is enough for Foley to quit.

Rating: B-. This one is likely going to have a lot of different opinions, but the biggest problem is that I didn’t exactly enjoy the match. Above all else, it was too violent (and yes I know that was the point) for and there was so much blood between two people who probably shouldn’t be doing this to themselves anymore. Then there is the Melina thing which is a real life friendship, but it came out of almost nowhere on WWE TV. I get why Foley quit to save her, though it isn’t like some big epic moment or friendship between the two. They did what they were supposed to do, but it wasn’t something I could really enjoy.

Foley is COVERED in blood and can barely stand.

The McMahons are warming up with Armando Alejandro Estrada in their office. Estrada promises that Umaga will be there to hold them against DX.

Smackdown World Title: Booker T. vs. Batista

Booker is defending. They take turns shoving each other into the corner to start until Booker slaps him in the face. That earns him a big push down so Booker chops away. It doesn’t exactly work though as Booker grabs a Stunner over the to rope and nails a hot shot to keep Batista down.

We hit the chinlock for a bit, with Batista fighting up for a belly to belly. They head outside, where Sharmell slips Booker the scepter to hit Batista in the face. Booker takes him back inside to crank on the arm and then switches back to the chinlock. The fans talk about a certain disease they claim Sharmell has as Batista fights up to crotch Booker on the top.

It’s back to the floor with Batista being distracted by Sharmell and sent into the steps. The Book End gives Booker two but the ax kick misses, setting up a Jackhammer for two on the champ. The Batista Bomb is loaded up but Sharmell comes in for the DQ. You can’t even say it was a long match for that lame of an ending.

Rating: D+. I’m not sure if you can call this a clash of styles but they didn’t have much of a flow to the match and the ending was even worse. This will set up a rematch on the next pay per view but I’m not sure I want to see it again. The match wasn’t the worst but it isn’t the kind of match I want to see again. If nothing else, you would think the World Title match would get more than eleven minutes but it doesn’t even hit that, leaving this feeling like a match that they had because it was required instead of something they wanted to feature.

Post match Batista wrecks Booker again to set up the rematch.

DX is talking to someone in the men’s locker room. They seem to have backup.

We recap D-Generation X vs. the McMahon, DX has tormented Vince and Shane for months now so now the McMahons (and their band of mercenaries, meaning Umaga and the Spirit Squad) are dealing with this here.

Vince McMahon/Shane McMahon vs. D-Generation X

DX does their usual intro and we’re ready to go. Actually hold on as the McMahons stay on the stage and send out the Spirit Squad. DX dispatches them in a hurry so here are Mr. Kennedy, Finlay and William Regal, who are beaten up after just a bit more time. Now it’s Big Show to take Shawn out while the other three beat up HHH on the floor. HHH gets put through the announcers’ table and NOW the McMahons are willing to head to the ring.

Vince slams Shawn down as we officially start, setting up Shane with the jabs. The bosses take turns beating Shawn down, though Shane is smart enough to hit the floor and stomp HHH down. A double suplex sets up a Paisan elbow and Shane takes HHH down again. There’s a Demolition Decapitator (JR: “They think they’re Demolition.”) into a Hart Attack into a Doomsday Device for two on Shawn, with Shane being stunned.

Shawn fights up and hits a double clothesline, allowing the hot tag to HHH. House is cleaned in a hurry and Shawn beats Shane up on the floor. Cue Umaga though and Shawn gets taken out, leaving the McMahons to beat on HHH. With Umaga ready to wreck DX even more, cue Kane to fight him to the back. HHH is down in the corner as Shane loads up Coast To Coast but Shawn is back up to superkick it out of the air. Sweet Chin Music into the Pedigree finishes Vince.

Rating: ;C-. It was another nicely done story with the execution lacking. As has been the case for the entire feud so far, DX never felt like they were in trouble. Having the army there helped a good bit and DX was at least down here, but we are reaching kind of a goofy point where you can only throw so many people before it stops mattering. An army of midcarders is a big update over the Spirit Squad though so it’s a step forward, but the match, again, wasn’t much to see.

A lot of celebrating ensues, with a trainer checking on Shawn.

We recap John Cena vs. Edge for Edge’s Raw World Title. Edge cashed in Money in the Bank to win the title at New Year’s Revolution but then Cena took it back at the Royal Rumble a few weeks later Then Rob Van Dam took the title and Edge got it back, with Cena giving chase. Edge slapped Cena’s father on Raw, so you know it’s personal.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Edge

Edge, with Lita, is defending and loses the title if he is disqualified. Cena wastes no time in shoving Edge hard into the corner to begin the destruction. The referee has to cut things off and Cena misses a charge into the post. That means Edge can hammer away and send Cena outside for a nine count. A spinwheel kick gives Edge two but Cena’s release fisherman’s suplex gets the same. Cena gets tossed over the top and out to the floor for a breather.

Back in and Cena misses a crossbody and we hit the chinlock. Cena eventually powers out so Edge boots him in the face for two. Edge heads up top and gets crotched, though he is fine enough to shove Cena down and score with a top rope clothesline for two. The camel clutch goes on until Cena fights up with a slam for the double knockdown. It’s Cena back up with the Throwback and it’s time to pick up the pace.

Lita throws in a chair because she forgot the rules but Cena gets rid of it just as fast. Cena fires off his clotheslines but Edge cuts him off for two. Cena’s victory roll gets two so Lita gets on the apron, only to get knocked down again. A double clothesline gives us a double knockdown until Edge is up with the Edge-O-Matic for two.

The spear is loaded up but Cena counters into the STFU. Edge grabs the rope, allowing Lita to slip him some brass knuckles. Cena doesn’t mind and loads up the FU, which draws Lita in. Again, that’s fine with Cena who puts them on his shoulders at the same time. Lita gets flipped down but Edge slips out and uses the knuckles to the back of the head to pin Cena and retain.

Rating: B. It’s the best match of the show, but that isn’t exactly clearing a high bar. They were starting to feel things at the end before the screwy finish but at least Edge got a pin instead of having Lita come in for the DQ. Cena was starting to have the Superman vibe here as he was fired up and unstoppable, which makes the ending seem a little more impressive. They did well here, though the mic work is still the high point of the feud.

Edge and Lita celebrate as Cena wakes up to stare down down and end the show.

Overall Rating: C. I’m not sure if it’s the lack of one match standing above the rest or the lack of anything really changing but I still don’t care for this show all that much. It also doesn’t help that nothing really jumps off the page as far as quality, leaving this to be a not exactly memorable show. This felt like they were gearing up for their next brand exclusive shows. That is a way to go, but then why should I want to watch this? The show does feel big, but nothing happens here and that leaves you with no real reason to watch it, which isn’t exactly what you expect from a show usually this important.

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Summerslam 2005
Date: August 21, 2005
Location: MCI Center, Washington DC.
Attendance: 18,156
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Tazz, Michael Cole, Jonathan Coachman

It’s a big show here with a card that doesn’t quite live up to the hype. We have a huge main event between Hulk Hogan and Shawn Michaels, but after that it’s kind of a downgrade with Rey Mysterio vs. Eddie Guerrero with a kid (symbolically) above the ring. The World Title matches see John Cena defending against Chris Jericho and JBL challenging Batista in a No Holds Barred match. Maybe they can make it work though so let’s get to it.

Lilian Garcia sings the Star Spangled Banner.

The opening video looks at the big matches, which works a bit better. Granted that might be because it’s set to Remedy by Seether and I always liked that song. Shawn vs. Hogan gets its own section of the video, because nothing on this show comes close to it (fair enough).

US Title: Chris Benoit vs. Orlando Jordan

Jordan is defending and it’s a German suplex into the Crossface to make Benoit champion in 25 seconds. Now THAT is how you wake a crowd up while giving Jordan exactly what he deserved in Honky Tonk Man style.

Vickie Guerrero comes in to see Eddie and asks him to calm down. This isn’t about Dominic because it’s all about Eddie not being able to beat Rey. Eddie wants someone to carry on the Guerrero legacy and Vickie talks about him having a heart of gold. But there’s also an evil inside of him that won’t leave Rey alone. Eddie: “So now you don’t think I can beat Rey?” Eddie throws her out and reassures himself that he’ll win.

We recap Matt Hardy vs. Edge. Lita left Matt for Edge while Matt was hurt and then he was released. Matt invaded Raw a few times to get at Edge but then he was rehired and it was just Matt Hardy again. Tonight is the big fight.

Matt Hardy vs. Edge

Hardy runs to the ring and starts the fight on the floor as it feels like Matt wants to kill him. They get inside with Matt hammering away and a loud HARDY chant. Matt grabs a rear naked choke but Edge gets to the ropes and then back outside. Back in and Edge hits a headbutt to put Matt on the ropes as the fans are all over Lita.

A spear through the ropes puts them back on the floor but Matt hammers away with right hands to the head. More right hands in the corner have Edge in trouble so he drops Matt face first onto the post to knock him silly. Even Lita looks concerned as Matt is busted open. Matt can barely stand so Edge kicks him in the head….and the referee stops it.

Rating: D+. So yeah Matt comes back, gets in a few shots, and then gets busted open for a referee stoppage in five minutes. The first minute or so felt like a war but then it was little more than a hard hitting match with one big spot. This is the kind of thing that needed to go about eighteen minutes with both of them bleeding, but that would suggest that Matt was something important, rather than just a way to get Edge over. I can go with that as Matt is Matt and Edge has been a near main eventer for a long time now, but this was a major disappointment after the setup.

We recap Eddie Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio. Eddie can’t beat Rey and has been driven completely crazy over jealousy and his failures. Therefore, Eddie is going to try something else so he brought up that Rey’s son Dominic was really Eddie’s biological son. Eddie wanted Dominic, but a social worker said they had to settle this, so a ladder match was made instead.

Rey Mysterio vs. Eddie Guerrero

Tony Chimel: “The following contest is a ladder match for the custody of Dominic!” And that’s your most ridiculous ring introduction of all time. Dominic and the social worker are in the front row so Eddie goes over to them for a rather evil smile. Rey comes out and hugs Dominic so Eddie goes over and shakes the social worker’s hand. We’re ready to go and Eddie talks a lot of trash as they stare each other down to start.

Eddie gets in a cheap shot to knock Rey into the corner but Rey monkey flips him out to the floor. A whip sends Rey into the ladder though and he has to springboard in with a dropkick to knock Eddie off. Eddie goes to get another ladder so Rey dropkicks that one into his face, followed by a springboard seated senton to the floor. Back in and Eddie saves Rey’s climb with a sunset bomb but he can’t hold on, making it look rather messy. Eh to be fair that’s a pretty tricky spot.

Eddie hits him in the ribs and face with the ladder before sandwiching Rey between some ladders. The fans know what’s coming and are rather pleased with the slingshot hilo onto a ladder onto Rey onto another ladder. Rey gets up and uses a ladder to bridge his way up top to cut Eddie off, including a backdrop onto the bridged ladder. The crash bangs up Rey’s knee so he climbs rather slowly, allowing Eddie to dropkick the ladder out and hurt the knee even more.

Eddie reverse powerbombs him ribs first into the ladder on the top rope and there’s that evil smile again. That’s enough for another climb but Dominic comes in to shake the ladder. That just annoys Eddie so he yells at Dominic and demands a hug. Eddie: “I’m your new daddy now!” Eddie goes to hit him but Rey makes the save as Dominic is back with the social worker who let him jump the barricade and interfere in a violent match.

Rey sends him into a ladder and then 619s said ladder into Eddie’s face, only to hurt the knee again. The knee is ok enough to Drop The Dime onto a ladder onto Eddie and then load up the ladder again. Eddie climbs up the same side for an electric chair but Rey shows him how to do the sunset bomb for the huge crash. Rey goes up again and grabs the case but Eddie kicks the ladder out and pulls Rey down into a big spinebuster.

With Rey pinned under the ladder, Eddie goes up but stops to talk a lot of trash. He can’t unhook the thing anyway, allowing Rey to wiggle free and kick the ladder over. Apparently Vickie was supposed to run in there and missed the cue, explaining why Eddie couldn’t understand how a hook worked. Eddie is back up with Three Amigos, including the third onto the ladder. That means another climb but this time Vickie comes out for the save as she shoves the ladder over. Vickie pulls Eddie back so Rey can climb p and win.

Rating: B. It’s rather good with some big crashes, but the Vickie/Dominic stuff was too much and brought the match down. Rey vs. Eddie is something you can watch all day, especially if Eddie is all evil, but they could have come up with something better than a ladder match for custody papers. It was too far and became dumb rather than dramatic, which defeats a lot of the purpose.

Post match Vickie is relieved and Rey hits Eddie with a briefcase for a bonus.

Chris Jericho doesn’t like John Cena’s theme music and promises to make him as forgettable as the New Kids On The Block. He beat the Rock and Steve Austin on the same night and Cena isn’t on their level.

Eugene vs. Kurt Angle

For Eugene’s (Or Angle’s?) Gold Medal with no time limit and Christy Hemme is here with Eugene. Angle goes off on him to start and stomps Eugene down into the corner. Eugene comes back with a Faarooq spinebuster but Angle breaks up the People’s Elbow attempt with a hard clothesline. The fans are very pleased with this as they don’t seem all that into Eugene here.

Angle rolls the German suplexes for two and the fans are happy again. Eugene gets sent into the buckle a few times so the comeback is on, including a Rock Bottom for two. The Stunner gets the same and Eugene takes down the non-existent straps. Angle reverses the ankle lock by rolling him into the corner though and it’s the Angle Slam into the ankle lock for the win.

Rating: D. This could have been on Raw as Eugene was completely overwhelmed. The charm is long past gone now and it’s just Eugene doing Austin and Rock moves with almost nothing in between. It was just a squash anyway as Eugene is treated like the glorified jobber that he is. Angle needs to move on to something else and Eugene needs to become something else entirely.

Post match Angle stands on a chair so he can be awarded the medal again.

The Divas, in swimsuits, wash a limo with the Presidential seal on the door. The window goes down to reveal Vince McMahon. Vince: “Hey, why not?” There’s a McMahon For President bumper sticker on the limo for a bonus.

Undertaker vs. Randy Orton

Rematch from Wrestlemania because Orton isn’t happy with his loss. It’s weird to see Undertaker come out first. Orton bails to the floor to start so Undertaker takes a second before shoving him down. A slap gets in Orton’s head a bit but he’s back up to dodge some right hands. Undertaker grabs a headlock (that’s a rare one) but Orton is right back with a hiptoss into a clothesline. That just earns him a big boot to the face and Orton is stunned in a hurry.

Undertaker goes technical with a keylock into Old School but Orton somehow understands what it means when Undertaker stands on the top while holding an arm. Old School is broken up with an armdrag back down but Undertaker LAUNCHES him into the corner to hammer away. The big boot and jumping clothesline give Undertaker two but the big boot in the corner only hits….well corner really and Orton grabs a DDT for his own two with Undertaker putting a foot across the rope.

Flashing back to his Evolution days, Orton cannonballs down onto the leg and then wraps it around the post. The leglock goes on so Undertaker punches his way to freedom, only to earn a knee drop to the ribs. Undertaker limps into the powerslam for two and it’s time to go to Texas with a spinning toehold.

That’s broken up as well and Undertaker starts kicking at Orton’s knee, earning a one off BORING chant. That doesn’t last long either as Orton is right back to the knee as the slow pace continues. Undertaker kicks him out to the floor for a ram into the steps and the apron legdrop as this isn’t exactly hitting a high gear. Old School connects back inside and it’s the Downward Spiral to Orton, who is right back with a dropkick for the double knockdown.

The RKO is blocked so they fight over a Tombstone until Orton gets two off the backbreaker. Orton goes up but Undertaker rolls through the high crossbody and grabs him by the throat. The chokeslam connects but a “fan” comes in. The distraction lets Orton hit the RKO for the fast pin.

Rating: C+. It was a struggle to get this high as there was no sense of urgency or any time until the end where either of them seemed close to going to a finish. At least the Wrestlemania match had an awesome near fall of the RKO but this was a bunch of leg work until they got to the finish. It could have worked if they had gone to a better ending but this never got into a higher gear.

And it’s Cowboy Bob Orton. You can book the rubber match already.

Some members of the Republican National Committee are here.

We recap Chris Jericho vs. John Cena. They’ve been having issues since Cena made his Raw debut on the Highlight Reel. Then they got in an argument over who was the bigger rock star, which turned into Cena’s Steve Austin vs. Eric Bischoff’s Vince McMahon with Jericho and Carlito as the chief lackeys. The former story was better but why do that when you can do the same thing you’ve done so many times before?

Bischoff wishes Jericho’s luck.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Chris Jericho

Cena is defending. They go nose to nose to start and a lockup doesn’t go anywhere. Jericho’s headlock is just as ineffective but he grabs a suplex to take over. There’s the spinwheel kick to drop Cena again but the springboard crossbody only lands on the floor. Back in and Cena hammers away, only to charge into a dropkick in the corner. A suplex gives Jericho two and a basement dropkick to the headsets up the chinlock.

They go outside with Jericho choking away with a cord but Cena is back with right hands. This isn’t exactly blowing the roof off the place so far. The big flying shoulder misses though and Jericho hits the running bulldog. Jericho has to bail out of the Lionsault so he tries the Walls, which is kicked out to the floor in a hurry. Cena drops the middle rope Fameasser over the ropes for two on the way back in but the FU is countered into a DDT for two. It’s time to start in on the back with a backbreaker and some elbows as the fans are loudly split.

The running crotch attack to the back only hits ropes though and they’re both down again. Cena is back up with that hard clothesline into the ProtoBomb. The Shuffle is countered into the Walls in the middle though, sending Cena on the long crawl to the ropes. Jericho pulls him back in but Cena makes the rope on the second attempt to a rather loud reaction. Cena’s back is good enough to try a super AA but Jericho slips out and grabs another suplex for another two. An argument with the referee lets Cena grab the FU to retain.

Rating: B. This took some time to get going but they drew the crowd into it and it turned into a heck of a match by the end. Cena is showing some signs of brilliance in these big matches and Jericho has more than shown that he can hang with anyone so this was a benefit to both of them. Good match here as Cena is becoming a bigger and bigger star every single week.

We recap JBL vs. Batista (hometown boy) for the Smackdown World Title. JBL beat him by DQ last month so now it’s No Holds Barred. Not much more to it than that as JBL isn’t quite the believable challenger.

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

Batista is defending and it’s No Holds Barred. We get the JBL dollars raining from the ceiling during JBL’s entrance. The fight starts at the entrance with Batista ramming him into various things. A fire extinguisher into the face drops Batista though and JBL punches him around the barricade, only to have Batista spear him through said barricade.

They get inside for the first time with JBL kicking him in the head, followed by some whipping with a belt. Back up and Batista charges into a boot in the corner, setting up the Clothesline From JBL for two. JBL slides in the steps and this isn’t going to end well. The powerbomb off the steps is countered into a backdrop off of them and Batista hits the spinebuster. There’s the Batista Bomb but Batista doesn’t cover. Another Batista Bomb onto the steps retains the title.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t much but it was way better than their previous match as it didn’t go on forever, though the stipulation wasn’t exactly used. They went with the definitive ending here as Batista completely beat him, which is all it should have been. JBL was never a threat to Batista and now they can both move on to something else, with both of them going in the proper direction.

We recap Shawn Michaels vs. Hulk Hogan. They teamed a handful of times and then Shawn superkicked him on the Fourth of July. Shawn said he had to know and the match was made. Everything went spiraling out of control after that though, with Shawn turning it into a weird near shoot on Hogan’s career while Hogan just referenced Bret Hart and screwjobs a few times. Shawn has carried this feud on his back and it’s going to be interesting to see how they get to the big boot and legdrop.

Hulk Hogan vs. Shawn Michaels

Hogan has the big flag out for the entrance. It’s a long staredown to start before Hogan shoves him away and shows off the biceps. Hogan shoves him down a few more times and Shawn is already frustrated. A headlock works a bit better for Shawn until a shoulder sends him into a backflip through the ropes as the overselling is already strong. Back in and Shawn knees him in the ribs but gets put on top so Hogan can kick him in the ribs.

Shawn bounces as high into the air as he can for a crotching, before a ram into the buckle gives us a bump that Mr. Perfect would think is too much. A clothesline puts Shawn on the floor where he rolls backwards again, gets up and falls back down. Shawn manages a kick to the face though and starts chopping away in the corner. The slap to the face does not go well so Shawn does it again before chopping even more. A third slap earns Shawn a right hand out to the floor but they both get posted with Hogan staggering around a lot.

Shawn posts him again but still can’t put Hogan down so it’s time for some left hands to the head. Some right hands in the corner get Shawn shoved down again (make it twice), only to have him finally punch Hogan down (you don’t see that too often). Hogan is finally busted open and Shawn grabs the sleeper to follow the Randy Savage formula from Wrestlemania V. Shawn’s arm is covered in blood as Hogan suplexes his way to freedom.

The forearm into the nipup lets Shawn drop the elbow (OH YEAH indeed) but this one misses (leave it to Savage kid). Hogan slugs away but Shawn tries another forearm, which takes out the referee. The fans want Bret (fair enough after the promos building this up) but Shawn is up first and heads to the top, only to come back down for a terrible Sharpshooter (even Rock’s is better than that).

Another referee comes in and Hogan very slowly makes it to the rope. Hogan kicks him into the second referee and everyone is down again. A low blow drops Hogan and a chair to the head finally lets Shawn hit the elbow. Sweet Chin Music connects for two but Hogan kicks out, Hulks Up, punches away and finishes with the big boot and legdrop. So that’s how they got there.

Rating: B-. The match was a weird one (YOU THINK?) as Shawn was doing his over the top selling and turning it into a joke at first but then it settled into a match with a pretty simple formula that hit the high points but didn’t exactly break the mold. Hogan was the definitive winner here and Shawn hit everything he could without being able to finish Hogan off. I liked it well enough and it’s certainly a dream match, but it’s two matches in one and that’s a little distracting.

Post match Hogan poses but Shawn stops him to make everything nice. Shawn says he had to know and, as usual, wrestlers are rather forgiving about the whole situation. It’s more posing to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This show was all over the place with some good wrestling and action but a lot of things that felt like they should have been so much more. It’s an enjoyable show and something I’d watch again down the line, but it felt like they were going for a stacked show and as it is, it’s just pretty good. Fix some of the bigger holes and it’s a great one, but I’ll take what I can get after a build that wasn’t their best work.

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WWE Vault Grab Bag VI
Commentators: Lenny Leonard, Rob Niemi, Tony Schiavone, Lord Alfred Hayes, Vince McMahon, Byron Saxton, Jim Ross, William Regal, Lenny Leonard, Rod Trongard, Jim Ross

So I’m up to another one of these and after last time, I’m rather intrigued by what that could mean. There are some absolutely great things available but since it’s all random choice, I have no idea what I’m going to pull. That makes it all the more fun so hopefully it works out. Let’s get to it.

From Evolve 99. We actually get a special intro from World Heavyweight Champion Gunther, who says this is what wrestling is supposed to look like.

Walter vs. Zack Sabre Jr.

Sabre’s Evolve Title isn’t on the line. Sabre tries to go around him to start and is quickly taken into the corner, earning himself a front facelock. That’s broken up and we get some nice applause, followed by a rather aggressive headlock takeover to Sabre. Walter easily powers him down by the arm and a test of strength goes badly for Sabre as well. They go to the test of strength again and Sabre can’t break the bridge.

Walter can break Sabre’s though, only for Sabre to pop back up in quite the impressive visual. The big chop gives Walter two and he doesn’t like Sabre trying to chop him back. A big slam sends Sabre flying as this is pretty one sided thus far. Sabre finally pulls him down and stomps the arm but Walter uses the good arm to knock Sabre’s soul into the next county.

Another one turns Sabre inside out and a right hand drops him again. Back up and Sabre kicks at the leg to pull Walter into a kneebar. Walter gets to the rope and they head outside where he hits another hard chop. Lane: “I don’t know exactly how much money Sabre owes Walter but I’d be happy to lend it to him.” More chops have Sabre staggering around so he tries a chop of his own, earning himself one heck of a boot to the face. Back in and Walter wins another strike off, even shrugging off a middle rope elbow to the jaw.

Sabre does manage a DDT out of the corner though and they’re both down. Sabre’s PK is cut off so he kicks at the arm and gets an abdominal stretch. With that broken up, Walter busts out the dropkick out of the corner and it’s another double down. Back up and Sabre tries another chop and gets kicked into the sleeper for his efforts. Some suplexes give Walter two but Sabre is back with the Octopus.

That’s reversed into a failed Tombstone attempt and now the PK connects, leaving Sabre down for a breather. Back up and Sabre tries to chop again and gets dropped with a single shot to the face. Sabre tries a European Clutch, which is countered into Walter’s sleeper, which is countered into the Clutch for two. Back up and Sabre grabs a guillotine choke but Walter reverses into a suplex.

They get up again and Walter chops him down again, with commentary pointing out how the striking has been a REALLY BAD IDEA for Sabre. Walter chops him down again but a clothesline is countered into a cross armbreaker. That sends Walter over to the rope and he chops his way out a triangle choke. The powerbomb only gives Walter one so he hits a second for the pin at 17:58.

Rating: B. This was kind of an odd match, as Sabre was trying to come up with a way to get around Walter’s chops and never getting close. The idea seemed to be that he was trying to get through with a hold but Walter never came close to feeling like he was in serious trouble. It was more Sting vs. Vader from the 1992 Great American Bash, with Sabre getting smashed in the end for quite the emphatic win. Either way, those chops were devastating and Walter looked like a smashing machine, as has often been his custom.

From the First WWF Event In London (that’s pretty much what it was called) on October 10, 1989 in a match I’ve seen a bunch of times.

WWF Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Randy Savage

Savage, with Sherri, is challenging while Hogan has Elizabeth. We get the bell and Savage immediately hits the stall button, as he has a tendency to do. The lockup goes to Hogan, who shoves Savage hard into the corner for another breather. A running shoulder drops Savage again and they go outside, where Sherri goes after Elizabeth. Back in and Savage gets knocked to the floor again, where he grabs the mic and promises to take the title.

This time Sherri gets inside with him for a double beating, which Hogan shrugs off again and knocks Savage outside. Sherri is sent outside with him but it’s enough for Savage to rake the eyes and FINALLY get a breather. Hold on though as Savage goes after Elizabeth on the floor, allowing Hogan to jump him again. Back in and some choking draws Sherri to the apron, where Elizabeth actually knocks her over the top.

Hogan goes outside to stalk Sherri, allowing Savage to get in another shot to take over again. The top rope ax handle gets two and Savage grabs a sleeper, as he just never learns. Hogan fights up and hits some running shoulders before they clothesline each other for a double down. Savage grabs a rollup with trunks for two and the sleeper goes on again.

That’s broken up and Hogan makes the comeback like he’s a superhero fighting out of a sleeper but Savage snaps his throat across the top. Sherri slips in the loaded purse for a top rope shot to the head, only for Savage to pull him up at two. Naturally the top rope elbow brings Savage to his feet and the comeback is on. Sherri comes in to no avail and it’s the big leg to retain (with Elizabeth cutting Sherri off) at 14:03.

Rating: C+. Maybe it’s that I’ve seen this match so many times or that it’s another example of Savage looking like a moron against Hogan, but this didn’t do much for me. Savage had lost to Savage so many times by this point that it stopped mattering, though the London fans hadn’t seen it yet so at least it was new to them. If nothing else, Savage winning once, even off a fluke of some sort, would have made things feel more dramatic. I’m just not sure when that could have happened.

Post match we get a lot of posing, with both Elizabeth and the fans seeming to enjoy it.

From January 20, 1998 in a dark match before Raw, described as “The Attitude Era’s WILDEST Dark Match”.

Erin O’Grady vs. Vic Grimes

O’Grady is better known as Crash Holly and Grimes was one of Da Baldies in ECW. The fact that this has SLP and various other VCR buttons included tells you all you need to know here. O’Grady strikes away in the corner to start but gets shoved out with ease. Grimes tosses him out of the corner but O’Grady nips up in a rather impressive athletic spot. Some running dropkicks stagger Grimes and a missile dropkick gives O’Grady a delayed two.

A top rope hurricanrana drops Grimes again but he’s back up with some big shots in the corner. Grimes, who weighs about 300lbs, misses a charge in the corner and crashes out over the corner, allowing O’Grady to hit a nice springboard dive. Back in and O’Grady runs the ropes until he gets spun into a heck of a side slam. A torture rack dropped down into a backbreaker has O’Grady in even more trouble and a reverse sitout powerbomb plants him again.

They head outside, where Grimes grabs a chair to hit himself in the head a few times. O’Grady is sat in the chair and Grimes goes back inside for a running flip dive over the top, which only hits the empty chair. Back in and O’Grady gets his throat snapped across the top but Grimes misses a Swanton of all things. A missed charge in the corner lets O’Grady grab a tornado DDT and he slingshots forward to grab a hurricanrana. O’Grady tries it again but gets caught in a powerbomb, with Grimes flipping him up into a cutter for the pin at 7:02.

Rating: B+. Yeah it’s really that good, with O’Grady pulling out a bunch of stuff that had me thinking of AJ Styles. These two had worked together a bunch of times in California (where this took place) so it was no surprise that they had great chemistry together. It’s also no surprise that they both got developmental contracts immediately after this match. Check this out, as it’s genuinely a very entertaining match and by far the best I’ve ever seen from O’Grady.

From January 28, 1992 in Amarillo, Texas, a dark match at a Superstars taping.

Hulk Hogan/Randy Savage vs. Berzerker/Jake Roberts

Well dang the boys are back together. Berzerker is substituting for Undertaker, which makes me think how a Hogan vs. Berzerker run would have gone. Not well, but the idea would have made sense. Berzerker backs off from Hogan to start before hammering away. A dropkick of all things misses though and Hogan knocks him out to the floor. Back in and Hogan pokes him in the eyes, allowing Savage to come in for a change.

That lets Berzerker take him into the corner, allowing Roberts to send him crashing out to the floor. Mr. Fuji (of course he’s here) gets in a cane shot before Savage is thrown back inside for a Berzerker style beating from Berzerker. Roberts gets in a few shots of his own before handing it back to Berzerker, who is knocked away without too much trouble.

It’s back to Hogan for the usual house cleaning, including a big boot to send Berzerker over the top. Hogan beats on Roberts (that’s a weird visual) before handing it back to Savage to slug away. The top rope ax handle sends Roberts outside and he takes a walk but here are Undertaker and Paul Bearer to cut him off. Back in and Hogan gets a rollup for the pin (with Savage counting as well) at 8:16.

Rating: C. The action was nothing to see as it was a post show dark match, but dang the star power was high here, with the red hot Roberts, the freaking MEGA POWERS and Undertaker. Oh and Berzerker, who actually didn’t take the pin, which is kind of a shocker. This is the kind of thing I love seeing from the Vault (or the Savage Unreleased DVD) as it legitimately feels special and makes you wonder what else is hidden in those archives.

From New York City, New York on May 4, 1981 and this is a classic.

Sgt. Slaughter vs. Pat Patterson

This is the Alley Fight, which basically means street fight. We get an intro from Slaughter, explaining that this stems from the Cobra Clutch challenge, where Patterson (an interviewer) was offered $10,000 to get out of Slaughter’s Cobra Clutch. It led to a fight (of course) and they had a match which went to a double DQ. Therefore, it was time to go violent.

Slaughter goes over the entire match and even explains the ending, as Slaughter knows how to drag anything out. Apparently Slaughter had to get his passport photo when his head was still bandaged and people knew it was from the Alley Fight. I’m sure that’s the case Sarge. After a nearly EIGHT MINUTE intro from Slaughter, we’re ready to go.

The fans get rather excited at the announcement of the match and Patterson is in jeans and an I Heart New York shirt. Slaughter has the Grand Wizard Of Wrestling with him and Patterson jumps Slaughter as he gets inside to start fast. Patterson kicks and stomps away in the corner before pulling off the belt. The whipping is on, followed by some choking, but Patterson is backdropped out to the floor. Back in and Patterson whips away again before kicking Slaughter in the ribs with those big cowboy boots.

Slaughter gets in a shot of his own though and wraps the belt around Patterson’s mouth. Some choking has Patterson in trouble but he flips Slaughter out to the floor to escape. Back in and a middle rope knee hits Slaughter so Patterson does it again. Slaughter kicks him down and drops a jumping knee of his own before going up top but thinking better of it.

Patterson gets in a shot of his own to bust Slaughter open and the catapult sends him into the post to make it even worse. Patterson’s comeback is cut off with a low blow but Slaughter can barely stand up. He slowly hammers on Patterson, who gets his own cowboy boot and starts hammering away. The blood is so bad that the Wizard throws in the towel to give Patterson the win at 14:13 and blow the roof off the place.

Rating: B. This was a heck of a fight and it lived up to the expectations. The key here was that it came off like an actual fight with two guys wanting to hurt each other. Patterson was way past his prime here but he worked hard and had a heck of a performance. I dug this one quite a bit and it’s more than worth a look to see two guys beating the daylights out of each other without needing a bunch of insane weapons.

From October 17, 2012, a dark match at an NXT taping.

We’re joined in progress with Kassius Ohno attacking CM Punk for the DQ in a match against Antonio Cesaro. Cue Seth Rollins for the save so the fans want a tag team match. Works for Punk and we’re ready to go.

Kassius Ohno/Antonio Cesaro vs. CM Punk/Seth Rollins

Aksana is here with the villains. Ohno and Cesaro try to leave but get dragged back to the ring for the opening bell. Rollins takes over on Ohno and grabs a cravate, allowing Punk to come in and strike him down for two. The Muta Lock goes on to put Cesaro in trouble and he has to grab the rope. It’s back to Rollins for a dropkick to Ohno but Aksana grabs the leg, allowing Cesaro to get in a big boot.

Rollins gets his legs snapped with some wishbones for two and it’s back to Cesaro to send him hard into the corner. Rollins finally fights back against Cesaro and gets over for the tag to Punk. House is quickly cleaned, including the running knee in the corner to Ohno, followed by the bulldog right back out. The top rope elbow…I guess connects as we cut to the crowd, meaning it was a likely botch of some sort, as Cesaro makes a save. Rollins is back in for a Sliced Bread to Cesaro and Punk adds the GTS for Ohno for the double pin at 10:33.

Rating: B-. This was a perfectly fine match, though I’m a bit curious about the likely botch on the elbow. Commentary didn’t act like anything was wrong so I’m wondering what we missed in there. Either way, this was a good way to send the fans home happy at the end of the night. Punk was a mega star and Rollins was the NXT Champion, along with Cesaro being the US Champion so this was quite the star studded event.

From Corpus Christi, Texas on December 2, 1991, a dark match at a Wrestling Challenge taping.

Ric Flair/Jake Roberts/Undertaker vs. Randy Savage/Jim Duggan/Roddy Piper

Mr. Perfect and Paul Bearer are here with the former. Oddly Undertaker would have been the WWF Champion here but is neither announced as the champion nor brings the belt with him. Flair backs Piper into the corner to start and gets slapped down, with Piper backing him into the other corner. Back up and Flair actually busts out a leapfrog before being knocked out to the floor. It’s off to Roberts, who wants Savage, which has Piper declaring Piper stupid.

Savage wrecks Roberts so Undertaker comes in and gets to beat on Duggan. Naturally the fans chat USA, despite the one non-American in the match being on the good side. Duggan fights out of the corner to hand it off to Piper, who explodes on Flair with the rapid fire punches in the corner. Some slower punches are cut off by the referee, allowing Flair to get in a cheap. The villains take turns beating on Piper, who slips away without much trouble. Everything breaks down and Savage drops the elbow for the fast pin on Flair to get out of there at 8:43.

Rating: C+. Totally acceptable send the fans home happy match here and that’s all it needed to be. It’s about getting some star power out there with the good guys going over in a match that doesn’t mean much. Duggan felt like the odd man out in there but those big right hands work on anyone. Fun stuff here.

From Wrestlemania XXVII Axxess.

Zack Ryder and Tyson Kidd introduce us to a tag match. Apparently they got a text at the last minute asking them for this match, which aired on MTV. Kidd considered it was an honor to be put in Piper’s sleeper.

Zack Ryder/Tyson Kidd vs. Roddy Piper/Rob Dyrdek

Piper comes out before Dyrdek and talks about how this is for the Make A Wish Foundation (ah there we go). He asks if Ryder and Kidd are having a good day before threatening to make it worse. Piper brings out a pair of unknowns and then Dyrdek, who skateboards down a ramp and goes over the top for quite the entrance. Kidd says that doesn’t make Dyrdek entertaining and no one wants to see a Johnny Knoxville wannabe team up with a broken down has been.

Somehow Kidd thinks insulting Piper is a good thing and Piper talks about fans coming here to see him 27 years ago. Now they’re here to see Dyrdek (or Kid Lightning), though Ryder isn’t convinced. Dyrdek praises Piper and says that the other two don’t know when lightning is going to strike. Piper (thankfully wrestling in a shirt) starts with Kidd and, after some stalling, drives him into the corner. Kidd shoves him away and actually goes for a handshake, allowing Piper to get in some slaps.

Piper works on the arm and spits at Ryder before handing it off to Dyrdek to stay on the arm. Ryder comes in so Piper and Dyrdek take turns working on his arm as well. Dyrdek actually gets knocked down and Kidd gives him a backbreaker, only to miss a middle rope elbow. Piper comes back in to fire off right hands and eye pokes but gets taken into the corner. One of the unknowns shoves Ryder down and Dyrdek comes down the ramp on his skateboard to dive into a crossbody for the pin on Ryder at 3:47.

Rating: C. The ending alone was far better than I was expecting (I would have bet on this being the basic rollup pin) but this was pretty much exactly what it should have been. Piper is old and Dyrdek isn’t a wrestler and the heels are just warm bodies for their sake. It’s perfectly fine as a way to give the Axxess fans a treat and there is nothing wrong with that.

From a WWA event (billed as a Funkin Dojo showcase event) in Quincy, Massachusetts on August 22, 1998.

Kurt Angle vs. Christian Cage

Dory Funk Jr. and Jim Cornette are here too. Angle is wearing basic workout shorts and tennis shoes for a weird look. A fireman’s carry lets Angle ride him on the mat a bit and he picks the leg to do it again. Cage actually wrestles him down but can’t do much on the mat. A headlock takeover has Cage in more trouble and Angle grinds away on a headlock. Back up and Cage stomps away in the corner before dancing around a bit.

Cage sends him outside for a tennis racket shot to the back and Funk has to help Angle back inside, as a manager tends to do. We hit the chinlock back inside, followed by the layout reverse DDT for two. Back up and Angle rolls some German suplexes before a belly to belly gets two (with the mat sounding like they’re crashing hard every time). Cage is back with a powerslam but misses a top rope splash, allowing Angle to grab a rolling three quarter nelson for the pin at 8:45.

Rating: C. The key thing to remember here is that Angle debuted TWO DAYS before this, making this his third ever professional match. Of course he’s not any good yet and has no idea what he’s doing. This was all about Angle getting his toes wet (he’s not ready for feet) and there is nothing wrong with that. The match is hardly anything good, but it was a way for Angle to do his basic stuff and get used to being in front of a crowd. The fact that he was about a year and a half away from being the Eurocontinental Champion and having a heck of a match with Benoit and Jericho at Wrestlemania is nothing short of remarkable.

From Dragon Gate USA’s Mercury Rising 2010.

Warriors vs. World-1

That would be Cima/Gamma/Dragon Kid vs. BxB Hulk/Masato Yoshino/Naruki Doi. Kid and Yoshino start things off with Yoshino’s wristlock not lasting long. Instead they run the ropes until Kid snaps off a headscissors. We’re clipped to Gamma rubbing Hulk’s face in the corner and chopping him in the head. Kid comes back in and drops some knees with Doi making the save.

We’re clipped again to Gamma coming off the top with a kendo stick for a low blow to Hulk. We’re clipped again to Cima double stomping Hulk and tying up his legs while suplexing Doi at the same time. Kid is back in for the save as everything breaks down and we’re clipped again to some stereo Black Widows going on, with Kid and Yoshino chopping it out while still holding said octopuses. Kid gets two off a DDT with Yoshino having to make a save. Cima puts Yoshino in the Tree Of Woe but misses a Coast To Coast, allowing Yoshino to come back with a missile dropkick/top rope backsplash (not bad for the same time).

Kid gets release German superplexed and Yoshino adds a Michinoku Driver for two more. We’re clipped again to Yoshino getting triple dropkicked but Doi kicks Cima into a cradle for two. Hulk slams Cima for two but Gamma catches him on top. Yoshino is back in with the nasty kendo stick shot to Hulk (the ref doesn’t mind) and Kid grabs a super poisonrana for the huge crash.

A West Coast Pop gives Kid two and we’re clipped again to Yoshino grabbing a nasty choke on Gamma with Hulk cutting off the save as Gamma passes out at 7:45 shown. The whole match is almost half an hour so I won’t rate it, but if you’ve seen Dragon Gate six man tags, you know they’re absolutely insane and a blast every time.

From an AWA show in St. Paul, Minnesota, March 13, 1983.

Hulk Hogan/High Flyers vs. Jesse Ventura/Bobby Heenan/Ken Patera

Oh this could be fascinating. The High Flyers are Greg Gagne/Jim Brunzell, the top good guy team of their day in the AWA. Heenan goes for a cheap shot to start but the villains are quickly cleared out, as you might expect. Hogan steps on Ventura’s bandanna and they’ll officially start, with Trongard even admitting that it’s going to break down sooner than later

Hogan takes over on the arm and snaps it over the top for quite the bump from Ventura. That’s already enough for the tag to Patera, who is quickly slammed. Gagne comes in to work on the arm and hands it off to Brunzell for more of the same. We get the required Heenan time and he actually takes over on Brunzell before being sent hard into the corner.

Gagne comes back in and takes out the other two before backing Heenan into Hogan, which would happen quite a few times over the years. The villains get Gagne into the wrong corner for some choking from Ventura and, like a schnook, Hogan tries to come in and makes things even worse. Patera comes in for the bearhug and Ventura does the same (imagine Ventura copying from a strong man with blond hair). The Argentine backbreaker has to be broken up so Heenan grabs a front facelock, with the referee not seeing the tag off to Hogan (what a nitwit).

Patera’s….we’ll say piledriver is countered into a backdrop but it’s still too early for the tag. Gagne slides between the legs though and it’s back to Brunzell for the house cleaning. Heenan breaks up the Indian deathlock so it’s off to Hogan for the real comeback. Hogan drops Patera and slingshots Heenan inside as everything breaks down. The legdrop (with Heenan having to flip into place as he realized what was coming) is enough to give Hogan the pin at 14:03.

Rating: C+. The AWA is the definition of an acquired taste and rarely does itself very well with one off, stand alone matches. The big idea was getting into the promos and characters, which only went so far here. Hogan getting to wreck people always worked and you could see what would become his usual stuff in there. Verne Gagne did screw up with him, but there was absolutely no way Hogan was staying there long term.

Post match the brawl stays on until the villains are cleared out again.

From World Championship Wrestling (the show and the company), May 20, 1989.

Terry Funk vs. Eddie Guerrero

Guerrero is 21 here and Funk insists that he get his chaps off before receiving a proper introduction. Guerrero rolls away from Funk to start and hits an enziguri to the floor (and of course Funk is willing to bump like crazy for him). Back in and Funk drives him into the corner for the chop as JR talks about Funk injuring Ric Flair. Guerrero flips over him in the corner but gets caught in a giant swing of all things. Funk misses a charge into the ropes and Guerrero gets in a headscissors but misses a dropkick.

One heck of a toss over the top isn’t a DQ for some reason (JR doesn’t get it either) and Funk follows him, only to clothesline the post by mistake. Guerrero gets in a heck of a high crossbody to the floor but misses a slingshot dive. Funk runs the ropes a few times and hits a dropkick through the ropes, followed by the piledriver on the floor. What is left of Guerrero is thrown inside, knee dropped and pinned at 5:13.

Rating: B-. Terry Funk is the perfect example of someone put onto this planet for the purpose of being a professional wrestler. There is something about watching him in the ring that is so unique and so out there that it is absolute fascinating to see. You could tell he wanted to do something with Guerrero here and gave him A LOT of offense, which makes sense given Guerrero’s family. This is a pretty well known match and it’s not just for the name value, as they had some entertaining chemistry.

Overall Rating: B-. As usual, these things are all over the place and while I’ve seen a few of them before, there was enough in here that was either new or new enough to make this fun. The Alley Fight and that shockingly awesome O’Grady vs. Grimes match are the highlights and while there was no run away entry, it was a great look at “huh, so that happened”. That’s what I love about the Vault and it was on full display again here.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter and Bluesky @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Summerslam 1990
Date: August 27, 1990
Location: Philadelphia Spectrum, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 19,304
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Roddy Piper

This is the requested redo for the year and I’m rather happy about that. I watched this show more times than I can count as a kid as it was the first wrestling show I had on video. I’ve seen it so many times that I can probably quote at least a bit of the commentary from every match and know most of the matches by heart so looking back at it should be fun. It’s a double main event as Hulk Hogan returns to face Earthquake and Ultimate Warrior defends the WWF Title against Rick Rude in a cage. Let’s get to it.

The opening video hypes up the show, including the main events. This gives us the classic 80s Vince McMahon hype voice and that is always going to work. At the end of the day, the guy is a promoter and a really good one.

Rockers vs. Power And Glory

Vince promises this this is going to be a HUMDINGER so you know he’s serious. Shawn comes to the ring so gingerly that you would think he had a bad knee and wasn’t ready to go here or something. Power And Glory, already in the ring, (it was a different time) jump Michaels before the bell and hit him in the knee with the chain to give him a reason to be down. Why is that so much to ask?

Roma hammers on Jannetty to start but Marty fights back with armdrags and dropkick (why yes, he is a face in a tag team). Slick (the evil, yet stylish) manager offers a distraction as Piper wants to know which one is the power and which is the glory. You mean him being named HERCULES isn’t a hint? Jannetty gets beaten down as Piper talks about Mick Jagger and David Bowie, perhaps missing the idea of the Rockers.

We pause to take out Michaels again as this continues to be a handicap, including a gorilla press to Jannetty. A small package doesn’t get Jannetty out of trouble as Roma comes back in and hits some backbreakers. Jannetty powerslams his way to freedom and hits the top rope fist drop (such a simple yet good looking finisher) with Hercules having to make a save. That’s finally enough as the PowerPlex puts Jannetty away at 5:59.

Rating: C. Kind of a weird way to start the show here but I do like the idea of just getting in and out without trying to do anything nuts. Power And Glory weren’t some great team but they could beat Marty in a handicap match. That’s all you had here and it went well enough, even if it was pretty clear that Shawn shouldn’t have been out there in the first place.

Post match Shawn gets in the ring and the big beatdown is on, with Marty trying to cover Shawn’s knee (another Jagger/Bowie reference from Piper). Of note: the VHS that I remember glitched at this point so I didn’t remember seeing the last minute and a half of the match until I was almost twenty years old. Shawn does a stretcher job and would be out of action for about a month and a half.

Mr. Perfect isn’t worried about facing the Texas Tornado on less than ten days’ notice, even if he knows almost nothing about Tornado. Bobby Heenan talks about how worthless Texas tornadoes are because you can see them coming a mile away. Then Perfect gets REALLY serious and says no one beats him.

The Texas Tornado promises to come out of the clouds and be powerful, unpredictable and devastating. Then he’ll go back into the clouds with the Intercontinental Title. For some reason, that one has always stuck with me, even if it isn’t very good.

Intercontinental Title: Mr. Perfect vs. Texas Tornado

Perfect, with Bobby Heenan, is defending. Of note: Tornado was in yellow trunks for the interview and is in white here so he doesn’t match Perfect’s yellow and blue singlet. The lockup goes to Tornado, who shoves him into the corner without much trouble. That’s enough to send Perfect outside, as commentary thinks they might be surprised by the strength. So they haven’t even looked at Tornado?

Back in and they circle each other a bit as Piper wants to know what Heenan knows about wrestling. A hard whip into the corner sets up a slam on Perfect and a clothesline puts him on the floor, with the required big bump from Perfect. Back in again and Perfect slugs his way out of a wristlock, setting up a sleeper. Some shots to the face in the corner don’t do much to Tornado, who catapults Perfect into the post and grabs the Claw. The Tornado Punch (HUGE bump from Perfect) connects for the pin and the title at 5:15.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t much of a match as Tornado was a bit all over the place (shocking) and a lot of the stuff was rather basic. That being said, this was all about the surprise factor as Tornado gets the title almost immediately after debuting. Of note: for someone perfect, Perfect lost every pay per view match he had in 1990, though finishing as runner up in the Royal Rumble could have been worse.

Perfect staggers out of the arena in even more great selling.

In the back, Gene Okerlund can’t find Sweet Sapphire (uh oh) but Heenan and Perfect come in to rant about the bad refereeing. Tornado CHEATED by sending him into the post and now it’s time to pay. Well not now but in the near future, though that might qualify as semantics.

Sweet Sapphire vs. Sensational Queen Sherri

Sherri has a huge mask on which absolutely TERRIFIED me as a kid. And there’s no Sapphire, despite the music playing multiple times. That’s going to be a thirty second countdown forfeit and no match. Granted the fact that Sherri was in a full length dress makes me wonder what she was exactly planning for this one anyway. Commentary is very confused by Sapphire’s whereabouts.

Dusty Rhodes is in the back and says he doesn’t know where Sapphire is either as she disappeared ten minutes after they arrived. No one has seen her and he is rather worried. Cue Jim Duggan for a rather random cameo, saying everyone is still looking for Sapphire. With Duggan gone, Dusty says that Sapphire is getting a lot of really expensive gifts but that isn’t his business. GEE, I WONDER WHO IN THE WWF IS RICH ENOUGH TO SEND HER THOSE PRESENTS!

Tito Santana vs. Warlord

Slick is here with Warlord and Piper promises to not make a bunch of taco jokes about Santana. A headlock doesn’t work for Santana to start but a dropkick manages to put Warlord down. Back up and Santana looks to load up a hurricanrana (not quite in 1990) so he can hammer away to knock Warlord outside.

That’s fine with Warlord, who drives him back first into the post, allowing Slick to stalk him with a shoe (yes a shoe). The slow forearms keep Santana down until he gets a boot up in the corner to slow Warlord down. The flying forearm rocks Warlord but he gets the foot on the rope at the last minute. Warlord blocks a monkey flip out of the corner though and a running powerslam finishes at 5:28.

Rating: C. This is a fine example of a power vs. speed match and Santana knows how to do that as well as anyone else from this era. Let Santana go out there and run around while Warlord uses his power game in short spurts. It is a formula that has worked forever and it worked well enough here, even in a short form match.

Survivor Series is coming. That’s the Undertaker debut show, which always blows my mind. Look at this card and consider that three months later, you would have someone who has faced Rusev and AJ Styles.

Demolition, all three of them, won’t say which two of them will be facing the Hart Foundation. Hint: it’s probably the two holding the belts here. Either way, they aren’t worried about facing the Legion of Doom after this, because they’re just a bunch of impostors. This was just after Crush was added to the team so Ax could be written out due to what was thought to be a heart problem. In reality it was a bad allergic reaction to some kind of shellfish (not a joke) and he was fine soon enough.

Tag Team Titles: Hart Foundation vs. Demolition

Demolition (Crush/Smash) are defending in a 2/3 falls match and we cut to the back where the Harts say they’re a bit surprised. They promise to win the titles because they are two Harts beating as one (always loved that line). Bret and Smash start but Neidhart comes in to knock an interfering Crush outside. Smash gets taken down into an armbar but knocks him away without much trouble, allowing Crush to come in instead.

Crush pulls a crossbody out of the air and slams Bret down but charges into a boot in the corner. It’s off to Neidhart vs. Smash, with the former getting kicked in the back by Crush (that cheater). A clothesline out of the corner gives Neidhart a breather and he hands it back to Bret, which seems rather quick after Bret took a good bit longer beating.

Everything breaks down and Demolition is sent into each other so Crush falls outside. The backbreaker and middle rope elbow get two on Smash, with Crush dropping a leg for the save. With Neidhart down on the floor, the Demolition Decapitator finishes Bret for the first fall at 6:19.

Bret and Crush start the second fall and a choke shove drops Bret fast. The neck crank goes on for a bit but Bret is back up with the Hart Attack clothesline (minus the whole Hart Attack thing). The hot tag bring in Neidhart (despite Crush holding Bret’s leg) for the house cleaning on Smash. There’s the powerslam for two and everything breaks down with the Hart Attack hitting Smash.

Crush DIVES over and grabs the referee, who he carries around the ring. Believe it or not, yes that is a DQ and we’re died up at 10:40 (total). Why in the world wouldn’t you just break up the cover there? That doesn’t exactly make Crush look smart but Demolition was never the brightest team.

The third fall begins so here is Ax to hide underneath the ring like a villain should. Bret comes back with a sunset flip on Smash, followed by Neidhart powerslamming Bret onto him (that was awesome) for two. Then we get to the “REALLY?” part of the match as Ax switches with Smash (ignore the referee WATCHING HIM COME OUT FROM UNDER THE RING) and starts hammering away. Even when I was three years old, I never got how this was supposed to make sense (Smash’s face paint was even wiped off and Ax’s was fresh).

Smash comes back out to double team Bret but cue the Legion of Doom to pull Ax from under the ring and break up another Demolition Decapitator. Neidhart slingshot shoulder blocks Crush into a cradle from Bret for the pin and the titles at 15:50 in one of the all time great feel good moments.

Rating: B+. A lot of this is nostalgia but I LOVE this match and always have. What I didn’t get when I was a kid was that this was the culmination of a years long quest for the Harts to get the titles back and prove that they could do it without Jimmy Hart. The win felt like it meant something (Vince’s call is perfect as you can feel him get happy on saying THREE) and it still holds up to this day. Heck of a match, but this was more about the emotion and it worked great.

Wrestlemania VII ad. I can still remember the phone number.

The Legion of Doom is happy because they have been waiting on Demolition. What a rush….for them. The Harts come in and say they’ll fight anyone anytime anywhere no matter the odds. Quite the emotional burst there.

Sean Mooney is outside of Demolition’s locker room where you can hear them ranting and raving about the Legion of Doom.

Queen Sherri brags about her win over Sapphire and laughs off the idea that there were “early sightings” of her earlier today. Sherri: “WHAT IS SHE: A UFO???” On top of that, Sherri has heard rumors about Sapphire that makes her think Sapphire might be the smartest person around here. Sherri: “THIS IS TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE!!!”

Five minute intermission, thankfully without the countdown graphic included.

Gene Okerlund runs down the rest of the card and we see one of Bad News Browns’ Harlem sewer rats.

Damien, Jake Roberts’ snake, is in the shower.

Big Boss Man, who is guest referee for Brown vs. Roberts for no explained reason, doesn’t mind snakes or rats.

Nikolai Volkoff, now very pro-America, is glad to be in a tag team with Jim Duggan. Volkoff describes Duggan as his idol and calls the team the American Express (as opposed to the Orient Express you see).

Earthquake, with Dino Bravo and Jimmy Hart, is ready to crush Hulk Hogan for good, just like he did to Tugboat. He might as well crush Big Boss Man as well! Bravo promises to take care of the Boss Man while Hart promises a double stretcher job. Earthquake also brings up Tugboat asking fans to send Hogan cards and letters to make him feel better.

1. That was designed to replenish the WWF’s mailing list.

2. Each fan reportedly got a note signed (well, “signed” but close enough) by Hogan thanking them for their prayers.

3. That’s brilliant, and it’s the same thing the WWF did when the Islanders dognapped Matilda a few years earlier.

Jake Roberts is ready to turn Bad News Brown into a mouse.

A good chunk of these promos were not on the home video, likely for time.

Jake Roberts vs. Bad News Brown

Big Boss Man is guest referee and the fight starts before he gets to the ring. Jake tries a very early DDT but Brown slips out and kicks Jake down. Another DDT attempt doesn’t work and they head outside, where Brown hits him in the ribs with a chair. That’s good for a warning from Boss Man and Brown stomps away back inside. Roberts fights back with the snap jabs and the fans are already wanting the DDT. Brown counters it a third time, which Piper attributed to an oily head. More pounding on the floor ensues and that’s enough to get Brown disqualified at 4:48.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here as it felt like a match they advertised and then forgot to do anything which, which didn’t make it much better. Throw in the Boss Man as the tacked on referee and there was only so much to get out of something like this. It just wasn’t very good and I’m not sure what they thought they had here.

Post match Brown goes to drop a leg on Damien but Boss Man makes the save. Brown beats on Boss Man but Jake grabs Damien and clears the ring, sending Brown out of the WWF for good. The rats were never seen, save for a closed crate at ringside.

Demolition rants about the numbers game in their match and swears vengeance, first on the Legion of Doom and then on the Harts.

It’s time for Brother Love, who scared the heck out of me when I was a kid (and in modern times, scares me for entirely different reasons). Love asks if kids remember being told what to do when they were younger. Now they still need someone to do that because they are soft and weak. His guest is the man who can tell you what to do so here is Sgt. Slaughter. Er, make that DRILL Sgt. Slaughter this time.

Slaughter has been looking around and wants to find a great American. That’s what he has found here, which is why he has The Great American Award for Brother Love. That makes him think of Nikolai Volkoff, who suddenly loves America. Slaughter isn’t happy with that and declares war on Volkoff, because America has gone soft. If Saddam Hussein (or “who’s on” as Slaughter pronounces it) declared war on us tomorrow our boys would be destroyed. Saluting ensues, as we have a new top heel.

Mr. Fuji and the Orient Express are ready for their match but we cut to Gene Okerlund, who has found Sapphire….who goes into a room and locks the door behind her. Nice one Gene.

Orient Express vs. Jim Duggan/Nikolai Volkoff

Piper doesn’t quite buy the idea of Duggan and Volkoff being that bright. Before the match, Duggan and Volkoff belt out God Bless America, because of course they do. Duggan says God bless the troops and the Express attacks, only to be knocked outside without much trouble. The villains come back in with Tanaka bouncing off of Volkoff (Piper: “Yep, real dumb.”). The US chants are on as Volkoff shrugs off a shot to the throat and brings Duggan in to clean house. Everything breaks down and the Express is sent into each other, setting up the three point clothesline to finish Tanaka at 3:22.

Rating: D+. This was little more than a debut squash for Duggan and Volkoff and that is fine, though seeing the Express lose so quickly despite having some awesome matches with the Rockers was a little weird. It wasn’t bad for a match there to play off of current events but it was fine for a quick one. As long as the WWF doesn’t think Duggan and Volkoff are a big deal, it doesn’t mean much.

Dusty Rhodes can’t get into Sapphire’s dressing room and has to go to the ring for his match. He’ll be back.

Sean Mooney, standing on a ladder, talks to Randy Savage, who thinks the rumors about Sapphire are true. Savage talks about how the Founding Fathers weren’t thinking about people like Dusty when they talked about the American Dream and this is a grave situation. Speaking of graves, the ring is where Macho is going to bury Dusty so DOWN THAT AISLE! Savage was kind of feeling it here.

Dusty Rhodes vs. Randy Savage

This is Macho King (with Queen Sherri) and Dusty is as serious as he has been in his WWF run. Hold on though as here is Ted DiBiase (with Virgil) on the platform to say his money can buy anyone or anything. He brings out Sapphire with a bag full of money (the trip around the world and the Cadillac seem more valuable, though I’d love one of those WWF gym bags) and talks about how money will get you whatever you want.

Dusty goes after them but Savage jumps him from behind. They head inside and the fight is on, with Dusty getting in some shots of his own. Savage is knocked outside and hides behind Sherri, who sneaks him the loaded purse. One shot is enough to knock Dusty cold for the pin at 2:14.

In the back, Ted DiBiase, Virgil and Sapphire leave in the limousine, with Dusty Rhodes giving chase to no avail. That always made me sad as it was a rare instance of evil flat out winning and Dusty not being able to do anything about it.

Hulk Hogan and the Big Boss Man are ready for revenge on Earthquake. They dedicate the match to Tugboat and quite the beating that goes with the match.

Earthquake vs. Hulk Hogan

Jimmy Hart, Dino Bravo and Big Boss Man are here too and make no mistake about it: this is the show’s real main event. Feeling out process to start and we get the big shove off out of the lockup. That does not great for Hogan and far better for Earthquake, with Hogan dropping backwards. After a quick chat with Boss Man on the floor, Hogan slugs away and tries a slam, only to hurt his back (it worked in the Andre match).

Some right hands and chops stagger Earthquake (and drop Bravo/Hart) until a big right hand puts Earthquake down. Everyone heads outside where the seconds get involved, including going inside. A double big boot drops Bravo and another one knocks Earthquake into the ropes as Piper wonders what the referee is thinking. The referee gets Boss Man out so Bravo and Earthquake can hit a double slam on Hogan.

The big elbow gives Earthquake two and we hit a Boston crab, which is quite the visual. Hogan tries to power out but for once gets smart and grabs the rope right next to him (you could tell things were different in 1990, as Hogan using a ROPE to escape is just hard to fathom). Bravo gets in a slam on the floor but Earthquake misses another big elbow. The slam still doesn’t work for Hogan as Earthquake crashes onto him for two more to bang up the ribs even more.

We hit the bearhug (required) but Hogan fights out and tries…..a crossbody???? What the heck man? Either way, Earthquake powerslams him down and hits the Earthquake. Then he does it again and I think you know what that means. The comeback is on, complete with the slam working this time. There’s the legdrop but Bravo offers a distraction and Hart comes in to jump Hogan. Everything breaks down and it heads to the floor, where Hogan slams Earthquake onto (not through) a table and that’s enough for the count at 13:12. Hogan jumping up and down in celebration always looked weird.

Rating: C+. I love Hogan but the magic was starting to fade. You can tell that there is a lot going on here to try to keep the energy up, but Hogan just isn’t as special as he once was. At the same time, the countout was lame and while Hogan slammed him, it was hardly some big win. They build Earthquake up very well, but there is only so much that can be done when he’s Hogan’s rebound feud.

Post match the beatdown is on with Earthquake choking Hogan. Boss Man hits Earthquake in the back with a metal stool and just annoys him, allowing Bravo to come in as well. In a great visual, Boss Man whips out the nightstick and is ready to go, which is enough for Earthquake and Bravo to bail. Hogan poses (after suggesting that Earthquake is a chicken) but Piper doesn’t think Hogan won anything with the countout. Two things.

1. Piper getting on Hogan just feels right.

2. I know it’s for the house show rematches, but dang that countout always felt kind of lame.

Rick Rude, now short haired and serious, promise to win the WWF Title in the cage tonight and get his statue outside of the Spectrum next to Rocky Balboa. Bobby Heenan explains the idea of a cage match and promises no sequels. Rude: “And there ain’t gonna be no rematch!” I didn’t know that was a Rocky reference until YEARS later. Of note: Heenan started this promo by saying “he’s going to get that Intercontinental Title back”, which is the kind of thing that he would be saying because he could do more than one thing at a time.

Dusty Rhodes is fine with Sapphire taking the money because he offered up his innocence to her and she paid him back in scorn (he used that line a lot in his career and I’m still not sure I get what it means). Now the fans are asking when he’s going to get mad and even. He’s coming for Ted DiBiase because….America can give him shelter from the storm? Ok then.

Lord Alfred Hayes explains how the cage is built for the main event.

Hulk Hogan talks about how there are new buildings being built around the world and they are all earthquake proof. Hogan is going to take that big fat dude (his words) around the world and beat him over and over until he is the #1 contender. That’s not how you usually become #1 contender. Anyway, Hogan has a fourth demandment: believe in yourself. For now though, he going to get a new nine foot surfboard (or gun as he calls it) and go to the beach to chase sharks, at least until he finds that TITLE wave. Then he pretends he’s on a motorcycle and rides backwards out of frame. Hogan was a weird dude.

With welts on his back, Earthquake promises that it isn’t over with Hulk Hogan and promises more pain next time. Dino Bravo and Jimmy Hart rant a lot too.

Ultimate Warrior: “Do you know what Bobby Heenan has in common with the Liberty Bell? One is cracked and the other is a ding dong.” Would that be Ding or Dong? A lot of Founding Father references are made with Warrior promising to beat Rick Rude. The idea of the match is that Rude beat Warrior back at Wrestlemania V (which is never mentioned by name) so he could do it again here. In short, it didn’t work and this is a really lame main event as a result.

WWF Title: Rick Rude vs. Ultimate Warrior

Rude is challenging in a cage and they start fighting on top of the cage. Warrior knocks him down and hits a top rope ax handle to take over, setting up the ram into the cage. Another ram into the cage drops Warrior and Rude goes up, where he has to kick Warrior away. For some reason Rude comes back down and keeps stomping away but it’s too early for the Rude Awakening.

Warrior knocks him down but the splash hits knees, allowing Rude to hit the Rude Awakening. For no adequately explained reason, Rude goes up to the top of the cage for a right hand to the head. He STILL won’t cover so he goes up again (Heenan: “WHERE ARE YOU GOING???”) and gets punched out of the air this time.

Warrior goes for the door and gets it slammed on his head for two, as this just keeps going. Rude goes for the door as well but gets pulled back in, with the tights coming down in the process. This time Warrior pulls Heenan in and knocks him down, followed by an atomic drop out the door. Some clotheslines into the gorilla press lets Warrior escape (complete with hip swivel) to retain at 10:01.

Rating: D+. Not only was it a completely nothing match, but it was a match that didn’t stick around for very long. In this case that might be a good thing though, as Rude was a lame duck of a challenger as you could have. There was no one for Warrior to face and it showed badly, making this a pretty weak main event. It might have worked as a quick house show main event, but (allegedly) headlining Summerslam? Not quite.

Warrior celebrates to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. Nostalgia plays a big role in this one but it’s actually a rather good show. They keep things moving and important things take place, including Hogan’s return and two title changes. It’s still the very tail end of the Golden Era and now things can move forward into the new era. It’s not a classic show, but it is a lot of fun and certainly memorable (at least for me), which is something I’ll take every time.

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Hulk Hogan Mixtape
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Roddy Piper, Bruno Sammartino, Larry Zbyszko, Gordon Solie, Dusty Rhodes, Jesse Ventura, Gorilla Monsoon, Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan, Gene Okerlund

Well they had to do this. The Mixtapes have mainly featured the biggest and/or most beloved stars in company history and Hogan is WWE mega royalty. These things are absolutely random, with all kinds of matches, promos and segments. The best part is that they often avoid the most well known stuff so it’s almost four hours of less than remembered content. Let’s get to it.

We open with Hulk Hogan’s bouncing chest before he talks about being ready to face Hercules. He’s checked Hercules out and yes he has a body of a god. Hercules even looks like the real one (Huh?) but Hogan has been hanging out in the Garden of Eden with his main squeeze Eve and going 20,000 leagues under the sea. This is where the power lies, meaning the palm of his hand. Hercules has Bobby Heenan with him and that’s nothing new to Hogan, who has beaten everyone Heenan has thrown at him. This is where the power lies (I feel like I’ve heard that somewhere before).

From Summerslam 1990, a show I’ve seen about 1,483 times.

Hulk Hogan vs. Earthquake

Big Boss Man is in one corner and Dino Bravo/Jimmy Hart are in the other. This is a big return for Hogan after Earthquake put him out of action (to film Suburban Commando, so we owe Earthquake a thank you). Earthquake shoves him down a few times and drops him with a shoulder, sending Hogan outside for a chat with Boss Man (who flat out tells him to rake the eyes).

Back in and Hogan does rake the eyes but tries a slam, because that has worked so well for him over the years. Hogan gets sent into the corner but comes right back with some shots to the face, including a running right hand which has Hogan all staggered. The big wind up right hand puts him down (which is all the more impressive when Hogan winds up counter clockwise and then punches clockwise, which…my head huts).

Everything breaks down and the seconds come in, with Hogan and Boss Man hitting some double big boots (the referee doesn’t mind) but Bravo is back with a double slam to drop Hogan. The big elbow gives Earthquake two and he stomps on the fingers to make it worse. We hit the Boston crab (making Hogan tap, which means nothing in 1990 but it’s still a weird visual) and Hogan tries to push out before realizing he’s right next to the rope. Ever the genius, Hogan rolls outside right in front of Bravo, who gives him a slam.

Back in and Earthquake misses the big elbow and Hogan shows his brilliance again by trying, and failing at, a slam. Earthquake grabs the bearhug and Hogan grabs at the referee for some reason, even tearing his shirt. The right hands get Hogan out of trouble and some running shoulders stagger Earthquake. A crossbody of all things is countered into the powerslam, allowing Hogan to do his fish out of water twitching.

A pair of Earthquakes connect…and it’s Hulk Up time, with the fans getting right back into things. Earthquake hammers away and I think you know where this is going (as you’ve probably seen the match before). The big boot staggers Earthquake and a good slam puts him down for the legdrop. Hart comes in for the save and gets thrown at Earthquake as Boss Man takes Bravo out. Hogan goes outside with Earthquake where Hart misses the Megaphone shot. Another slam puts Earthquake onto (not through) a table (yes the show is in Philadelphia) for the countout at 13:17.

Rating: C+. This was all about Hogan’s big return and I’d call that a success, with the fans going coconuts for his usual stuff. Hogan has a reputation of mainly working with monsters and Earthquake is one of the best he ever faced. That was the case here, as Earthquake could move both himself and Hogan around while still looking imposing. The ending is a bit strange as it was designed to set up rematches at house shows, which is hardly what you expect in a high profile match like this. It’s not a great match, but it was all about the reaction from the fans and that worked.

Post match Earthquake chokes Hogan and Boss Man’s chair shots just annoy him. With that not working, Boss Man throws the chair down and whips out the nightstick for a big spin, which sends the villains running (probably the coolest thing Boss Man ever did in his career, as that just looked awesome).

Hogan introduces us to his parents and says he’s the same person he was growing up because of them. And then we have to do another take, complete with Gene getting makeup redone in between.

From I believe Championship Wrestling, August 20, 1980.

Hulk Hogan vs. Andre The Giant

Freddie Blassie is here with Hogan. They lock up and Andre shoves him around without much trouble, though Hogan shoves him right back into another corner. That just earns Hogan a boot to the chest but he easily slams Andre. Another slam plants Hogan right back and a big boot sets up the missed splash. Hogan bails outside and Blassie loads up his elbow pad, which is enough to knock Andre silly. The pad is unloaded as Andre is bleeding…and Hogan and Blassie just leave at about 3:45.

Rating: C+. This had some cool visuals, of course including the slam, which is bizarre to see on an official WWE release from before Wrestlemania III, but it felt like it was there to set up a bigger rematch. Hogan certainly had a lot of his stuff down here, though dang it’s weird seeing him as a heel. That being said, he ticked off Andre and that is about the dumbest thing anyone can ever do.

Post match Andre yells a lot.

We get a quick outtake from an NWO vignette, with Hogan and the Outsiders laughing at how long the interview has gone.

From WCW Worldwide in February/March 1995.

Hulk Hogan/Randy Savage vs. Pretty Wonderful

Hogan and Orndorff start things off with some running shoulders putting Orndorff down. It’s off to Savage to work on Roma’s arm and Hogan even gets in a middle rope ax handle. A cheap shot from behind takes Savage down though and Orndorff hammers away in the corner. Hogan’s attempt at a save just causes more double teaming, further proving that Hogan is a terrible partner.

The double teaming keeps Savage down and Roma gets some near falls. Savage finally fights up and brings in Hogan, who cleans house like he’s Hulk Hogan beating up Paul Roma. The big boot (a size 12 according to Solie, which astounds me that I have bigger feet than Hogan) and legdrop finish Roma at 7:23.

Rating: C. Normally I would say the match was what you would expect, but who would have expectations for the Mega Powers vs. Pretty Wonderful? It’s such a random tag match and while Hogan was very different than what he was doing in his glory days, there is always something to be seen when he faces Orndorff. Roma being there to take the pin is…well pretty much exactly what you would expect.

Hogan does a photo shoot in 2002. Dang that Undisputed Title looked awesome.

We go to the Dungeon Of Doom where the Master and Kevin Sullivan sense Hogan getting closer. Hogan falls through a wall into the Dungeon and realizes there are no Hulkamaniacs here and he’s never been here before. The water isn’t even hot! Hogan goes over to the Master and Sullivan and explains the members of their team. Sullivan threatens to destroy Hulkamania and a wall explodes, with the Giant coming out to choke Hogan down.

From Toronto, Ontario, Canada, December 15, 1985.

WWF Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Terry Funk

Hogan is defending and steals Funk’s cowboy hat to start. The hat is thrown down and Hogan (in blue trunks and boots for a change) drops some elbows on it as Funk talks to Jimmy Hart. Funk runs away again before getting back inside, where Hogan knocks him into the corner without much trouble.

Funk goes outside again and this time picks up the megaphone, which doesn’t work that well. Back in and Funk chops away on the ropes but gets clotheslined out onto the announcers’ table. Hogan brings him back in and Funk apparently kicks him low, with Hogan heading outside this time. Back in and Funk chokes a bunch, followed by a piledriver for two.

Funk takes him out on the ramp, and Hogan actually Hulks Up out there. They go back inside for a clothesline and elbow to Funk, followed by the big boot (with Monsoon accidentally referring to Hogan as Terry). A suplex is loaded up but Hart trips Hogan, earning himself a big boot. Hogan takes Hart’s boot off and knocks Funk silly (Monsoon: “WHAMMO!”) for the pin to retain at 8:43.

Rating: B-. These two fought a few times and had some good chemistry together, which is at least partially due to Funk being willing to bump like a madman for anyone. Hogan didn’t wrestle people Funk’s size very often and it’s interesting to see him have to change up the offense a bit. Throw in the blue trunks and this was a very different style for him.

Post match Hogan chases Funk off with a chair.

Bill Apter presents Hollywood Hogan with the PWI award for the Most Hated Wrestler Of The Year for 1996 (I’m guessing, as he also won it in 1998). Hogan talks about how the NWO is all about change and he’s hated despite doing so much to put food on the table for so many people over the years. Including Apter.

From New York City, New York, March 24, 1980.

Hulk Hogan vs. Tito Santana

Hogan has Freddie Blassie with him and Santana is a Tag Team Champion. Hogan jumps him with a knee from behind to start and an Oklahoma Stampede (well with a regular slam instead of a powerslam) drops Santana early. Some elbows miss though and Santana fights up with right hands and a dropkick.

Santana works on the arm but Hogan hiptosses him down, setting up the elbow. Hogan knocks him outside and we hit the chinlock back inside. Santana fights up again whips Hogan into the corner, only to get clotheslined back down. A suplex with trunks gives Hogan the pin at 8:13.

Rating: C. This was a very different kind of match than you would see from Hogan but that was due to it being the very early 80s. Santana was already doing his fired up comebacks and knew how to get a crowd going, but Hogan was pretty clearly getting a push here. The lack of a legdrop was certainly weird to see, but this was very, very early Hogan and it showed.

Hulk Hogan runs into Ric Flair, Brie Bella and Jerry Lawler, Pat Patterson (who gets a picture with him and John Cena at a show. Apparently that show is Wrestlemania XXX (I love the RING THIS WAY sign).

We look at Hogan doing a promo in what looks like 1985 but he keeps screwing up his lines.

From Monday Nitro, August 9, 1999.

Hulk Hogan/Goldberg/Sting vs. Sid Vicious/Rick Steiner/Kevin Nash

Hogan is the World Champion and that’s quite the lineup. To make it even bigger, this is Hogan’s return to the Red and Yellow (and to the rather catchy American Made) after more than three years in the black and white. Hogan shoulders Steiner down to start so Steiner grabs a headlock. That doesn’t work for him either as Hogan knocks him down and drops three straight elbows.

Everything breaks down and Hogan beats up all three at once, making me wonder why Sting and Goldberg need to be there. The villains bail out to the floor and now it’s off to Goldberg, who gets to face Nash. The flying shoulder puts Nash down so Sid comes in to choke, only to get kicked down by Sting. A top rope splash hits raised knees though and Sid gets to take over for the first time.

Naturally that’s too much for Sid so it’s back to Nash for the side slam. A turnbuckle pad is ripped off somewhere in there so Nash loads up Snake Eyes, which the referee cuts off. The referee gets bumped so Sting hits some Stinger Splashes into the exposed buckle. Steiner brings in a chair to whack Sting but it gets taken away and Nash is laid out. The Scorpion Deathlock gives Sting the win on the out cold Nash at 8:09.

Rating: B-. In something you don’t hear very often, the crowd carried this so much higher. WCW might not be the most fondly remembered place in this era, but this was a situation where the fans were WAY into what they were seeing. You do not see that from this time and it makes me wonder what might have happened if WCW actually followed up on it, but you know, Russo was the way instead.

Hogan and Randy Savage are at Venice Beach, with Hogan very pleased that Savage has joined the dark side. This is still in 1995, with the two of them promising to get back at the Dungeon Of Doom. A man with a beard is sat between them and seems to agree.

From Huntington, West Virginia, June 15, 1993.

Mega Maniacs vs. Money Inc.

This is a lumberjack match and two days after Hogan lost the WWF Title to Yokozuna at the King Of The Ring. Money Inc. jump them before the bell and are quickly cleared out as Hogan gets to rip the shirt off to Real American. The referee is even fine with ringing the bell while Hogan chokes DiBiase, which has to be a tax violation. Money Inc. is chased to the floor so Jimmy Hart gives Hogan some advice (“Just go to WCW, this isn’t happening.”)

Hogan and DiBiase start things off with Hogan punching his way out of the corner without much trouble. DiBiase is sent outside and gets beaten up by the Steiners, allowing Hogan to grab a chinlock back inside. This allows Afa to caress IRS’ briefcase as Beefcake comes in for a headlock. What looks like a low blow is stopped so it’s off to IRS, who gets headlocked as well. IRS is sent outside for another beating before Hogan comes back in for the running clothesline.

Back up and Hogan is sent outside for a beating from the Headshrinkers, with the Steiners running over for the save (no one saved the villains, showing where the true friendship lies). Back in and the Million Dollar Dream has Hogan in trouble and stays on for such a long time that Hogan should be legally dead. The somehow still alive Hogan gets up and it’s a double clothesline to put them both down. Hogan gets sent outside and then right back inside, where DiBiase gets two thanks to a foot on the rope.

IRS comes in and gets slammed off the top, allowing the rather needed tag off to Beefcake. House is cleaned but Beefcake is sent outside for another group beating. Back in and Beefcake gets punched down for two, with Hogan making the save. A clothesline puts DiBiase down and it’s off to Hogan for the big boot. IRS tries to bring in the briefcase but Hogan takes it away and knocks DiBiase silly for the pin at 14:26.

Rating: C. It was just a post taping dark match with some big stars included in a Wrestlemania rematch. The fans were still going to care about Hogan and it was nice to see him doing something else. At the same time, Hogan and Beefcake weren’t the most thrilling team, mainly because Beefcake could not have been more of a warm body next to Hogan rather than an important part of the team.

Post match the lumberjacks all get in the ring for the brawl, with Hogan being left alone with Giant Gonzalez. Ever the nice guys, Hogan’s friends all stand on the floor and Hogan bails from Gonzalez without throwing a single punch. And this was never mentioned again, as Hogan wouldn’t return to TV before going to Hollywood.

To the AWA! Hogan talks about how he can beat the Heenan Family on his own. He knows he can take the title from Nick Bockwinkel and will wear it around his waist instead of carrying it under his arm like a box of shoes. It doesn’t matter where he has to go, because he will defend the title no matter where he goes in the world. Bockwinkel is only still champion because of Bobby Heenan but he can’t run forever.

From Minneapolis, Minnesota, May 2, 1982.

Hulk Hogan vs. Nick Bockwinkel/Bobby Heenan

Handicap match. Hogan draws a line in the ring and wants Bockwinkel, who is quickly knocked down. Bockwinkel gets shoved into the corner with ease before thinking twice about this. A headlock doesn’t work either as Hogan shoves him away at the “five minute” count. The villains are sent into each other and we pause for a meeting on the floor.

Back in and a shot to the throat and a low blow don’t do much to Hogan, who knocks Bockwinkel away again. Hogan sends him into the corner for the tag off to Heenan but Bockwinkel stays inside. A cheap shot (at the ten minute mark, which is really eight) lets Bockwinkel choke but Hogan reverses for a choke of his own.

The missed charge hits the buckle and now Heenan is willing to come in and stomp away. More choking has Hogan in trouble, with Heenan getting to use a towel for the same. Hogan powers up on the kickout and we start what would become the Hulk Up. Heenan comes off the middle rope with an ax handle and that goes as well as you would expect. Hogan sends them together and drops the leg on Bockwinkel for the 12:19.

Rating: C. This was more of a way to hype up the endless string of title matches between Hogan and Bockwinkel. Hogan pinned him here with the legdrop and he could do it again in a title match. At the same time, the match was pretty basic with a bunch of punching and choking. I was more than a bit surprised that Heenan didn’t take the fall, but this makes more sense.

Post match Hogan beats Heenan up again (no wonder Heenan never liked him) and sends Bockwinkel outside. Heenan gets choked a lot and then tossed over the top as well.

Hollywood Hogan spray paints a wall and explains that the HH are from him.

We get some behind the scenes footage of a Hollywood promo, where he is rather pleased about beating up the Giant and winning the World Title. Now they’re ready for WarGames…and Hogan messes up a line and we have to do it again. In another take, Hogan spray paints a globe to show that the NWO is going to rule the wrestling world. He paints a Hulk Hogan shirt as well and then does the NWO HH signature again. Anything less would be uncivilized. Geez he had some crazy charisma as a villain and it was on display here.

From Monday Nitro, January 19, 1998.

Hollywood Hogan vs. The Giant

Eric Bischoff is here with Hogan but hang on as Hogan has a neck brace. Bischoff says Hogan can’t do this but Giant pulls Hogan over the top and powers him up as the bell rings. Cue Kevin Nash at ringside as Giant slowly knocks him around and chokes in the corner. Giant knocks Hogan up the aisle and then throws him over the top and back inside.

A backbreaker puts Hogan down again but he manages to knock Giant into the corner. With Nash holding the foot, Hogan climbs up and hammers away as the fans keep pointing at the entrance. Hogan hits a running clothesline in the corner and drops the leg…as Randy Savage is here. Well eventually, as he gets up top at about the two count so the referee has to see him and stop. The distraction is enough for Giant to get up and hit a chokeslam for the pin at 5:59.

Rating: C-. Gah I was hoping for the Robin Hood match. The match was rather slow, but the point here was that Hogan lost. Granted it would have been better if he had taken a loss like this about three weeks ago at Starrcade when the loss to Sting needed to be this clean (and this wasn’t exactly clean) but I’ll take what I can get. It’s also not a good sign for the NWO, as the foundation is starting to crack.

We go to 2002 and the Montreal ovation, which just does not stop. If I remember correctly this had to be edited for TV, as it went on for the better part of nine minutes. Hogan’s reaction here is great as you can tell he’s touched.

From Landover, Maryland, July 28, 1984.

WWF Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Paul Orndorff

Hogan is defending and this doesn’t have any commentary and is shot from a camera on the floor rather than a regular setup. Hogan atomic drops him to start and Orndorff bails to the floor. Back in and Hogan sends him into the corner and hits some elbows as this closeup camera work is messing with me. The big boot puts Orndorff down again but he goes to the eyes to cut Hogan off.

The piledriver triggers the Hulk Up but he doesn’t quite have it down yet so Orndorff knocks him back down. Hogan is busted open but Orndorff knocks him into the referee. Now we get the real Hulk Up (with the fans going nuts) and Hogan fights back, as he is known to do. We seem to jump ahead and come back with Hogan holding Orndorff’s foreign object, which the referee sees and calls for the DQ at 6:29 shown (the whole match runs about 12:00).

Rating: C+. These two always worked well together and it was nice to see them again, even if it wasn’t quite in their heyday. Hogan getting DQ’d sets up the rematch, which is probably something that they did all over the place. The match was fine, though nothing that they hadn’t done better a lot. And with these two, it was a lot a lot.

We go to I believe 1989 with Randy Savage promising to take the title from Hogan at their match that night in England (I’m assuming London).

From New York City, New York, January 27, 1986.

WWF Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Randy Savage

Hogan is defending and Savage has Elizabeth in his corner. Hogan charges in to start but Savage knocks him down and gets in a belt shot, which is fine with the referee (even commentary gets on him about it). A top rope belt shot puts Hogan down again as Savage still has his robe on. Hogan gets in a shot of his own though and even steals Savage’s sunglasses before sending him outside.

Savage gets sent into the post to bust him open and you know Hogan is going to be right there to stay on the cut. Elizabeth offers a distraction though and Savage gets in a cheap shot to knock Hogan outside. That includes a posting for Hogan, setting up Savage’s top rope ax handle.

Back in and another ax handle connects, followed by the big elbow…for two. Dang that still feels weird to see. Hogan fights up (not Hulks Up but fights up) and hits the big boot before cutting Savage off from going to the floor. Instead Hogan sends him outside in a heap but Elizabeth gets in Hogan’s way to prevent a posting. That lets Savage slip away and post Hogan to win by countout at 8:36.

Rating: C+. Much like the Orndorff stuff, these two were always worth a look and it was a fine enough match, even if it was again set up for the rematch. If nothing else, it was always nice to see Savage getting a win over Hogan, which only happened so often. Monsoon freaking out about Elizabeth was funny too as he couldn’t stand managers, including her.

Post match Hogan is livid and grabs a bearhug, with the dream team of Tiger Chung Lee and Mike Sharpe running in to break it up. They’re finally separated before Savage gets in a cheap shot and runs away. Savage would continue his momentum by winning the Intercontinental Title in a few weeks.

Hollywood Hogan has a baseball bat and makes Back To The Future II references. He hit a home run with Nick Bockwinkel and they mock Sting, Lex Luger and Giant. I’m assuming they just let these things go on for such a long time and then just edited them together for the short clips you would see on the broadcast. Anyway, Hogan promises to win the WCW World Title at Hog Wild.

Hulk Hogan and Mr. T. train for Wrestlemania and my goodness these two would be annoying to be around, as they shout all the time and never shut up.

From WCW Worldwide, November 12, 1994.

Hulk Hogan/Sting vs. Bruise Brothers

The Brothers jump them to start but Hogan and Sting fight back. The Stinger Splash and big boot connect, with the Scorpion Deathlock going on and the legdrop getting the pin at 24 seconds. Well that worked. The post match celebration is a lot longer than the match.

Hollywood Hogan and Dennis Rodman shill shirts. Rodman tells him that it’s ok to go make some more movies because Rodman has this stuff.

From Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, August 8, 2005, a dark match after Raw.

John Bradshaw Layfield/Kurt Angle/Shawn Michaels vs. Batista/John Cena/Hulk Hogan

This was released on the WWE Vault back in 2024. It’s a brawl at the bell to start and they head outside until we settle down to Batista shouldering Angle in the corner. Angle’s right hands just annoy Batista, who shoves him into the corner, where Angle grabs JBL around the waist in a slightly humorous way.

JBL comes in and backs Batista into the corner, where Batista switches him around for some choking. That’s enough for the tag off to Michaels, who actually knocks Batista into the corner. Batista isn’t having that and brings in Cena to slam Michaels off the top. JBL is back in to clothesline (not Clothesline, but clothesline) Cena to take over, with Angle getting to stomp away. Angle grabs a suplex and points at Hogan before stomping away even more.

Michaels comes in to send Cena outside and threatens to beat up the referee for his lousy attitude. Batista’s attempt at a save means the referee doesn’t see Cena using a small package, allowing JBL to…well have his suplex reversed actually. A sleeper goes on but Cena suplexes his way out again. Hogan comes in to clean house and everything breaks down. JBL makes the mistake of going after Hogan and it’s the big boot into the legdrop for the pin at 11:19.

Rating: C+. Ok so this obviously isn’t about the wrestling, as they were mostly in cruise control out there. That being said, the star power here is absolutely off the charts, with JBL, a World Champion and Hall Of Famer, a distant last in that category. You do not see lineups like this very often and it felt special, or at least really cool. It’s a fun thing to see and they probably did this at a lot of Raw’s to blow the fans’ minds.

Believe it or not, the winners celebrate for a long time.

At SuperBrawl V, Hogan is ready for Vader. Gene Okerlund is worried for him but Hogan insists that he’s ready to go even if it means playing possum. Jimmy Hart will be keeping an eye on Ric Flair too.

We get some footage of Hogan training with I believe the co-star of No Holds Barred, who isn’t quite as good in the gym.

We get a quick look at a Hogan/Zeus showdown in No Holds Barred.

From Boston, Massachusetts, June 6, 1987.

WWF Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Harley Race

Race, with Bobby Heenan, is challenging in a Texas Deathmatch. Hogan jumps him to start fast and they go outside, with Race being sent into the barricade and chaired in the head. Heenan gets chases off so Hogan can choke with tape, only to get kicked low. A falling headbutt on the floor has Hogan in more trouble and they get inside for the first time.

Race hits a piledriver and drops some knees for two so they head outside again. Hogan gets sent into the barricade and gets headbutted as Race slows things back down. Another knee drop gets another two but Hogan reverses a suplex into one of his own. Race chokes him right back down and they go through the entrance, with the curtain being knocked down. Back in and Race chokes him down again and goes up top, only for Hogan to grab the belt and block a headbutt. Another belt shot retains the title at 9:55.

Rating: B-. These two always worked well together, but it was kind of a mess with the belt being brought in at the end. The Texas Deathmatch rules weren’t exactly defined, though anything getting more hardcore around this time was a cool thing to see. Hogan got to mix it up a bit here and of course Race could work with anyone so this was a nice little addition.

Hogan was excited before going into the Hall Of Fame. He does tease getting back in the ring though. For some reason, his mustache looks extra wide here.

We get what looks to be a clip from after Raw, with Hogan doing a People’s Elbow to Scott Hall. This might be the night after Wrestlemania as they have a Canadian flag as well.

We get a vignette for Fall Brawl 1995 and WarGames, with Vader on the team before leaving for the WWF and being replaced by Lex Luger.

We get a sitdown interview with Gene Okerlund from 1991, with Hogan talking about having to deal with Ric Flair, who has signed with the WWF. Hogan talks about his daughter Brooke seeing him win the WWF Title at Wrestlemania and not understanding why Flair has his own title. He knows Flair is great but he wants to know how great. I’d like to know why this was mostly shot from behind Hogan, as it’s a weird visual.

From Halloween Havoc 1994.

WCW World Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Ric Flair

Flair, with Sherri, is challenging in a cage and it’s title/career vs. career (how fair) with Mr. T. as guest referee. They actually lower the cage once they’re in the ring and, because WCW, it doesn’t go on straight at first. Heenan sounds almost in tears to start as Flair’s career could be over. Hogan starts with a backdrop and right hands in the corner but Mr. T. actually breaks it up and shoves him away.

This lets Heenan get in a rant about how Flair earned his status and Hogan got here by being nice to kids and the elderly (Heenan: “MAKES ME SICK!”). Flair starts going after the leg to put Hogan down and Mr. T. shoves Flair as well. Flair’s snapmare takes Hogan down as Muhammad Ali is watching in the front row. Hogan fights back and rams him head first into the cage, giving us a Flair Flop. Hogan’s choke with the shirt is broken up by Mr. T. and they shove each other some more, sending Heenan into yet another rant.

Flair goes back to the knee and grabs a rather delayed vertical suplex. Back up and they chop it out before going up top, where Flair gets crotched. A small package gives Hogan two and he hits a big backdrops, followed by the ram into the cage. Flair’s head is raked into the cage and Hogan pounds away, sending Flair bailing over the top. That earns him more rams into the cage and another crotching on top. Hogan stops to do the hand to the ear, which is the kind of playing to the crowd that kept the fans behind him (Sting would do the same kind of stuff).

Flair is able to get in a shot to the knee though and the shinbreaker has Hogan in trouble. The kneepad is taken down and Flair crashes down onto the leg, followed by the Figure Four. That’s turned over and broken up, with Mr. T. getting bumped. Flair hits a belly to back suplex but there’s no referee, with Hogan’s kickout sending Flair onto Mr. T. again. Sherri tries to climb in and Jimmy Hart pulls her…well her skirt down.

Sting cuts Sherri off again but the Masked Man pops out from underneath the ring to beat up Sting and Hart with a lead pipe. Sherri comes off of the cage with an ax handle to Hogan. Flair gets in another shot to the knee and Sherri handcuffs Mr. T. to the rope. Hogan is sent head first into the Masked Man’s pipe and Flair beats on Mr. T.

There’s another suplex but Hogan Hulks Up and clotheslines Sherri and Flair. Sherri gets tossed off the top and Flair goes up, only to get knocked down for the third time. A big boot puts Sherri down and Hogan Hulks Up again, including the big boot. Heenan: “NOT THE LEG! NOT THE LEG!” Hogan drops the leg to retain the title at 19:26.

Rating: C+. Well that was….a lot. You had about five people interfering, a cage and Mr. T. as a terrible referee (who kept getting in the way and then had to be handcuffed so he wouldn’t screw anything else up). By the end, it felt like they were just doing the same stuff over and over to fill in time. Hogan and Flair can work a good match pretty much in their sleep but this was about five minutes longer than it needed to be and it hurt things a good bit.

Muhammad Ali presents Hogan with the title as Heenan is in tears.

Overall Rating: C. Maybe it’s the amount of Hogan I’ve seen over the years, but I was kind of bored by this whole thing. There were a few nice rarities, mainly of Hogan in pre-NWO tag matches in WCW and a few matches here and there, but nothing really stood out. Rather than some kind of awesome look at his career, this felt more like a bunch of DVD extras after you watched all of the good stuff on the main feature. Like, the Flair and Savage matches are fine but how many times can you see those two go after Hogan before it stops being must see stuff? Hogan worked with just about everyone from his era, but this was a lot of mediocre at best stuff.

 

 

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Wrestlemania XXXVII Night One
Date: April 10, 2021
Location: Raymond James Stadium, Tampa, Florida
Attendance: 25,675
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Samoa Joe, Byron Saxton
America the Beautiful: Bebe Rexha

Here we have an interesting one, as it’s the first show in a LONG time with fans. While this wouldn’t be a permanent change, it was more than a big deal as it felt like an actual Wrestlemania after the previous year’s…whatever you want to call that at the Performance Center. We’re still doing the two night thing and that should make for a big difference. Let’s get to it.

Just like last year, the theme is pirate related, as we’re in the home of the NFL’s Tampa Bay Buccaneers. This means a big WWE themed pirate ship, which looks incredible. WWE knows how to do this stuff and it pretty much never fails.

Here is Vince McMahon on the stage, with a bunch of the roster behind him, to talk about how the wrestlers have worked to get us through the pandemic. There has been something missing though and that is all of the people. McMahon thanks the fans and welcomes us to Wrestlemania. That’s a nice moment and it makes things feel that much bigger.

Bebe Rexha, and her guitar player, perform America The Beautiful.

The opening video talks about how the company is back in business after a very long wait. This is going to be a high seas, high stakes adventure and it’s going to be bigger than the history of history. Hold on though as the Jack Sparrow impersonator from last year comes in to say that line was rotten so we’ll go back to where we were last year.

The video switches into a Pirates Of The Caribbean style look at various stars, followed by a more standard opening video. Sparrow: “Now how’s that for a cold open?” The other voice wants a big finish though, meaning we get the big WELCOME TO WRESTLEMANIA voice. Points for creativity and a bit of humor at least.

Commentary welcomes us to the show…and for the first time ever, we have a WEATHER DELAY. The fans bust out the ponchos as commentary tries to fill in time by talking about the announced opener of Drew McIntyre challenging Bobby Lashley for the Raw World Title.

Thankfully WWE gets smart and lets its wrestlers talk to fill in some time. Shane McMahon is ready to take Braun Strowman out but he doesn’t have a problem with him. Yeah he suggested Strowman was stupid, but think of the things he can do when they’re in a cage tonight.

MVP and Bobby Lashley come in to say this will be the crowning moment of the Almighty Era. It’s all over for Drew McIntyre, who is going to lose his dignity, his consciousness, and the match. McIntyre comes in to tell MVP to keep talking but say it to his face. Mother Nature can’t save Lashley because McIntyre will fight him back here if he has to. Everything is broken up and McIntyre is a bit shaken up, saying he needs to be out there in front of the fans because he’s waited for such a long time for this to happen. McIntyre really doesn’t seem smooth at talking off the top of his head.

The Kickoff Show panel chats a bit with JBL hyping this up as much as he can.

New Day is ready for AJ Styles and Omos because they’re fighting champions. Are Omos and Styles even a registered tag team? New Day knows there are bigger people out there and they really don’t care. Big E. comes in to sing the team’s praises and my goodness this man missed his calling as a preacher. Woods: “I AM DELIVERED!”

Commentary laughs about the rain delay and Cole tries to dub it Wrestlerania, which goes over as well as most of his jokes.

Braun Strowman is ready to prove that bullies do not win as he gives Shane McMahon the beating of his life. Not a bad promo here.

The Kickoff Show panel praise Vince McMahon’s opening of the show. This feels like filler as they try to find someone else to interview, which is fine.

Kevin Owens, naturally in the KO Mania V shirt, talks about meeting Sami Zayn back in 2002 and seeing the passion in him. They’ve wrestled each other around the world, literally doing this hundreds of times. People told them that they wouldn’t make it to the show and now they’re doing it again at Wrestlemania. They’ve been through all kinds of things and now he’s going to Stun someone. If Logan Paul, who is going to be at the match, has something to say about that, he’ll be in the ring. Good stuff here, as Owens can talk and was handed a microphone to do just that.

Cole and Joe are now in ponchos (Saxton’s microphone has died) and now they have about five minutes before the show can start up.

Bianca Belair isn’t scared of Sasha Banks because she’s ready to prove herself. The best thing though is that the fans will be there to see it. You could tell this was off the top of her head and she did fine.

Seth Rollins can’t remember Kevin Patrick’s name (“It’s Mike right?”) and doesn’t like being asked about “Zazaro” swinging him a record number of times. He doesn’t get the disrespect but he’s ready to show why he’s the new Mr. Wrestlemania. Rollins wraps it up and dubs him “Kevin-Mike”. Rollins: “Can we hyphenate?”

Miz and John Morrison are ready for the scumbags that are Damian Priest and Bad Bunny. Priest can never be as moist as Johnny Drip Drip. Miz hypes up the show as being the biggest in the world but I’m trying to get over the Drip Drip thing.

The Kickoff Show says the announcement has been made and the fans are coming back in.

We get a video on Bobby Lashley vs. Drew McIntyre for the Raw World Title. Miz cashed in the Money In The Bank briefcase on McIntyre but Lashley beat him a few days later. McIntyre has been on a roll lately but wants to get the title back because he wants his moment in front of fans after beating Brock Lesnar in an empty Performance Center last year. Fair enough. Of note: you can hear some of the production audio leaking over the video, which is always interesting.

Commentary fills in a bit more time as the fans get back to their seats.

Here are Titus O’Neil (this year’s Warrior Award recipient) and Hulk Hogan, this year’s hosts. They hype things up and the fans don’t seem thrilled to see Hogan. We’re kicking it off with the Raw World Title match and thankfully Hogan doesn’t make any major blunders.

Of note: absolutely none of the delay stuff is on Netflix, which goes from the opening video to O’Neil and Hogan’s entrances. This is better than Peacock’s version, which was cut into two parts and all messed up. I’ll call it progress, even with less content.

In what I’m guessing is another issue with the editing, here’s the Lashley vs. McIntyre video again.

Raw World Title: Bobby Lashley vs. Drew McIntyre

Lashley, with MVP, is defending. They fight over a lockup and trade knockdowns off some shoulders. With that going even, they hit each other in the face with Lashley getting the better of things. McIntyre’s clothesline puts Lashley on the floor, where he rams McIntyre into the barricade to take over again. A neckbreaker gives Lashley two and he shrugs off McIntyre’s attempt to go after the arm.

McIntyre fights up with the clothesline comeback, followed by the overhead belly to belly. A northern lights suplex gives McIntyre one but Lashley is back with the spinning faceplant. McIntyre charges into a spinebuster for two more and Lashley is getting mad. The Hurt Lock attempt is broken up though and McIntyre sends him into the corner for the reverse Alabama Slam. McIntyre loads up a superplex but gets knocked into the Tree Of Woe. As is his custom, McIntyre sits up for the belly to belly superplex to send Lashley crashing.

The Claymore is countered into the spinebuster…and McIntyre nips up. McIntyre is back with three straight Futureshocks for two and McIntyre seems to know he’s in trouble. The threat of the Claymore sends Lashley outside so McIntyre hits the big no hands flip dive take out both Lashley and MVP.

Back in and McIntyre dives into a Downward Spiral but the Hurt Lock is blocked. Another spinebuster is countered into the Kimura of all things, with Lashley making the rope. The Glasgow Kiss looks to set up the Claymore but MVP yells at McIntyre, allowing Lashley to get out of the way. Now the Hurt Lock goes on and McIntyre can’t even use the corner to roll out. McIntyre passes out at 18:50.

Rating: B. This was exactly what it should have been with two big strong guys beating the fire out of each other. You don’t get that kind of a fight very often and it worked rather well, with Lashley getting a genuinely impressive win. McIntyre didn’t so much get beaten as much as he got caught, though Lashley was looking awesome here, even in defeat. Rather good opener.

Titus O’Neil and the NWO are in the back when Bayley interrupts. She knows they’re the hosts of Wrestlemania and she hosts her own show. She does the Too Sweet deal but no one will do it back to her. X-Pac says he’s a big fan and does it, with Hall pretty clearly having no idea who Bayley is but doing it anyway. The rest walk away. You know this was a blast for Bayley.

Women’s Tag Team Turmoil

For a Women’s Tag Team Title shot on Night Two. Naomi/Lana are in at #1 and Billie Kay/Carmella are in at #2. Even commentary admits that Carmella and Kay are thrown together but Graves would rather just look at Carmella. Naomi takes Carmella down to start and Lana is in for a bulldog and some dancing back up. Lana gets sent into the wrong corner but fights out in a hurry, allowing Naomi to come in and clean house. The springboard kick to the face lets Lana tag herself in and…complete miss on…something commentary didn’t even recognize. A double X Factor plants Carmella but Kay makes the save. Kay rolls Naomi up and Carmella’s assist gets the pin at 2:21.

The Riott Squad (Ruby Riott/Liv Morgan in this case) is in at #3 and Riott starts cleaning house. Morgan gets sent into the wrong corner but fights out rather easily, allowing the tag back to Riott. A backbreaker into a top rope backsplash (crushing Kay between Riott and Morgan’s knees) gives Riott the pin at 4:58.

Carmella isn’t happy and superkicks Morgan (who shoves Riott out of the way) as Dana Brooke and Mandy Rose are in at #4 (with the camera hiding Rose slipping on the ramp). Rose starts fast with a running knee and a Blockbustr for two on Riott, with Morgan making the save. Brooke’s running flipping neckbreaker gets two more but Riott rolls Rose up for two. The Riott Kick connects and Morgan comes back in as everything breaks down. Riott is sent outside and it’s a superplex into Brooke’s Swanton for the…not pin on Morgan as she reverses into a small package to pin Brooke at 9:18.

Even the ring announcer gets the elimination announcement wrong and has to issue a correction. Natalya and Tamina are in at #5 and things slow down. Natalya powerbombs Morgan for two and Tamina grabs a fireman’s carry. That’s escaped as Morgan makes it into the corner and grabs a Codebreaker, allowing Riott’s top rope backsplash to connect for two. Morgan comes back in and charges into Tamina’s superkick. That means a Hart Attack (right after commentary brought up Natalya not wanting to live off of her family’s name) into the Superfly Splash to give Tamina the final pin at 14:06.

Rating: D+. What am I supposed to get out of this? The tag division was basically non-existent at this point with a bunch of thrown together teams just like this. Natalya and Tamina aren’t interesting on their own so having them together isn’t going to make it much better. There was about one regular team in here and that’s not enough to carry a five team match.

Seth Rollins vs. Cesaro

This is over Rollins mocking Cesaro for never winning anything on his own, while Rollins is a big success. They were playing up something like a Rollins political campaign, which didn’t exactly work but a lot of people have tried it over the years. Cesaro charges at him with the uppercut to start but a pair of early Swing attempts are blocked. Rollins grabs a buckle bomb for two and we slow way back down.

A superplex floated into the regular version gives Rollins two more and frustration is setting in. Back up and they strike it out with Cesaro getting the better of things but the Swing is countered again. Rollins kicks him in the headbutt misses the Stomp, allowing Cesaro to get the Swing. Cesaro tries the Sharpshooter, sending Rollins over to the ropes. An uppercut misses in the corner though and Cesaro’s arm is banged up.

Rollins knocks him down again and hits a corkscrew top rope splash for two. Cesaro hits a quick Neutralizer for two, only to get caught in the Pedigree for the same. Rollins yells about surviving the Swing and hits him in the back of the neck, followed by a kick to the back of the head. Cesaro isn’t having this and hits an uppercut into the UFO (because that’s something a human can do). A 23 revolution Swing sets up the Neutralizer to finish Rollins at 11:34.

Rating: B. This was about Cesaro showing that he could do this on the big stage and it worked rather well. It’s something that fans had been wanting to see for a long time and it lead to Cesaro’s World Title shot in the main event of Backlash. They set up the Swing as being the big deal to make Rollins eat his words. In other words, build up the story and then pay it off with the good guy winning. Nice stuff.

We look at Jey Uso winning the Andre The Giant Memorial Battle Royal and Robert Roode/Dolph Ziggler retaining the Smackdown Tag Team Titles last night.

Roode and Ziggler brag about their success but think Omos and AJ Styles are going to take out the New Day.

Raw Tag Team Titles: AJ Styles/Omos vs. New Day

New Day is defending. Kingston can’t get an SOS on Styles to start but can escape an attempt at the Calf Crusher. Styles gets knocked into the corner and it’s time for some trombone inspired dancing. A blind tag brings in Woods for an elbow and a near fall so we hit the chinlock (Woods: “AJ! YOU ARE NOT A TAG TEAM WRESTLER! WE ARE EFFECTIVELY CUTTING THE RING IN HALF!”).

The unicorn Stampede has Styles down in the corner and Woods grabs a headlock but has to drag Styles away from the corner. It’s back to Kingston to continue the game of “keep the giant out of here”, including a middle rope double stomp to Styles. An enziguri misses and Kingston is back in with a springboard splash to the back.

Styles gets in a quick shot though and it’s off to Omos, who doesn’t seem pleased with Woods. The kicks to the leg and a dropkick are shrugged off and Kingston is knocked down as well. Some running elbows in the corner set up a backbreaker to Woods and Kingston is swatted away as well. A Phenomenal Forearm off Omos’ shoulders drops Woods and it’s a chokebomb finishes Kingston for the titles at 9:49.

Rating: C. This was a weird one as it was mostly Styles getting beaten up with the champs trying to avoid getting massacred by Omos. That’s a formula that has been done before (the Horsemen basically did the same thing against Kevin Sullivan and the Giant at Bash At The Beach 1996) and it still works. Omos and Styles don’t need to be this all time team, but they were good enough as a way to make Omos look like an unstoppable force.

We recap Shane McMahon vs. Braun Strowman. McMahon has decided to bully Strowman vs. being stupid (making it brains vs. brawn) but then kept running instead of fighting (including faking a knee injury). The result if a cage match and McMahon can’t run anymore.

Jerry Lawler is on commentary.

Shane McMahon vs. Braun Strowman

Inside of a cage (somehow the first non-Cell cage match since Wrestlemania II). McMahon won’t let the door open so here are Elias and Jaxson Ryker (McMahon’s cronies) to chair Strowman down. Strowman is sent inside and McMahon starts chairing away, only for Strowman to take the chair away. A shot to Strowman’s knee cuts him off again but it’s still not good enough to keep Strowman down.

Strowman threatens McMahon with GETTING THESE HANDS but some quick strikes slow Strowman again. McMahon tries to climb out and grabs a metal sheet off the top of the cage. Some shots to the back and another to the head get one on Strowman, who launches McMahon off the cover. McMahon gets launched into the cage a few times and a splash crushes him against the steel again.

The running powerslam is broken up though and a spinning DDT drops Strowman. A Coast To Coast hits Strowman in the ribs for two so Ryker and Elias try to help McMahon climb out. Strowman knocks the two of them off the side of the cage, sending McMahon crashing down. McMahon goes back up and finds a well placed toolbox to knock Strowman off.

That lets McMahon climb down…but Strowman rips the cage open and pulls him back inside for another beating. They both go back up top and stand on top of the cage, with Strowman just throwing McMahon back down. It’s time for vengeance though as Strowman goes back inside, yells at him, and hits the running powerslam for the pin at 11:27.

Rating: C. I’m not sure what to make of this, as Strowman wrecked McMahon the second he got his hands on him, as he should have. At the same time, it wasn’t exactly a great cage match, as it didn’t really come off as something that belonged at Wrestlemania. Maybe Extreme Rules, but not here. Good enough, but nothing special save for McMahon’s big crash.

Here’s some pyro. No idea why, but here it is.

Commentary talks about the Hall Of Fame but Bayley interrupts to call Michael Cole an idiot. She throws us to the package on the 2020 Hall Of Fame class, who didn’t get to have a special induction due to the pandemic.

Here’s the Class Of 2020:

John Bradshaw Layfield (yeah fine)
William Shatner (sure why not)
Bella Twins (moving on)
Jushin Thunder Liger (yep)
Titus O’Neil (Warrior Award, and they might as well rename it after him for all the stuff he does)
British Bulldog (perfectly acceptable)
New World Order (Hogan/Hall/Nash/X-Pac (yes X-Pac) only and….yeah again can’t argue that)

Batista was supposed to be in this class too but it was postponed due to the pandemic. He wasn’t mentioned here.

Wrestlemania XXXVIII is coming to Dallas (close enough), as announced by Steve Austin. Like he’d have anything to do at that Wrestlemania.

Booker T. joins commentary.

Miz/John Morrison vs. Bad Bunny/Damian Priest

Cue a bunch of bunnies to the ring, which brings out Miz and Morrison for their Bad Bunny diss track, Hey Hey Hop Hop (which is far catchier than it should be). This sends us to the video package, which is basically “Bad Bunny is a celebrity, Miz and Morrison don’t like him, Priest stands up for Bunny, tag match is on”. Bunny comes in on a semi truck for quite the visual.

Morrison backs away from Priest to start so it’s off to Miz vs. Bunny instead. Bunny gets in a right hand to the jaw and Miz realizes he’s in trouble. Another punch sends Miz in to the cornere, where Morrison declares it luck. Miz gets serious and drives him into the corner to take over. Back up and Bunny reverses a hiptoss into an armdrag and Miz is sent outside. Bunny’s la majistral gets two and he stops to dance a bit.

Miz slows things down and sends him face first into the ropes but Bunny snaps off a very spinning headscissors, with Priest getting VERY fired up on the apron. Morrison comes in and gets sent into the corner for a running elbow but the second is cut off. Miz gets in a cheap shot from the apron and Bunny is in trouble for a change. A sunset flip doesn’t get Bunny out of trouble as Miz kicks him in the face for another knockdown.

Bunny gets knocked outside and Morrison even busts out a Spinarooni in front of Booker T. Back in and Priest gets drawn into the ring so the double bunny stomping can ensue. Bunny manages to kick Morrison outside though and it’s a tornado DDT, allowing the tag off to Priest to clean house. The kicks set up South Of Heaven to Miz with Morrison making the save.

Stereo head claps and Falcon Arrows get two each and the villains head outside, with Bunny hitting the big dive onto both of them. Back in and Priest’s Cross Rhodes is countered into the Skull Crushing Finale with Bunny having to make the save. Bunny grabs a Canadian Destroyer to Morrison on the floor, setting up a Doomsday crossbody to give Bunny the pin on Miz at 15:14.

Rating: B-. This is a weird one to look at, as it’s ALL about Bunny, who had some pretty good athleticism and can do the big spots well enough. The match did go on a bit too long and that dragged it down a bit, though it gave the fans what they wanted. Bunny was one of the better celebrity wrestlers and Priest was there to do the heavy lifting. Good enough stuff, but it needed to be a few minutes shorter.

We look back at Lashley beating McIntyre earlier tonight.

We run down the Wrestlemania Sunday card.

We recap Sasha Banks defending the Smackdown Women’s Title against Bianca Belair. This was set up as Belair won the Royal Rumble but Banks wasn’t impressed, setting up their title match.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Bianca Belair vs. Sasha Banks

Belair is challenging. They stare at each other to start and then lock up with Banks shoving her down, only for Belair to pop back up. That means more shoving until Belair pulls a leapfrog out of the air. Belair backflips out of a sunset flip attempt and does her dance, allowing Banks to strike back. A wheelbarrow rollup is countered into a double chickenwing, which Banks reverses into a roll out to the floor.

Banks sends her from the apron into the post to set up a suicide dive…but Belair pulls a suicide dive out of the air. Belair gorilla presses her and walks up the steps for a toss back inside. That has Banks realizing this is different and pulls Belair down, only to get dropped with a running shoulder. A slam, with some squats thrown in, has Banks more in trouble but she gets smart by grabbing the hair. That lets Banks hit a running knee for two before she hammers away on the mat.

The chinlock doesn’t last long as Belair fights up and powers her to the apron. Banks tries to jump back inside and gets caught in a spinebuster so they head outside. That lets Banks grab the hair but Belair uses it to pull her into the steps. Banks’ running knees only hit the barricade and Belair heads back inside. A double slingshot suplex (with Belair having to muscle her up as only she can) puts Banks down and Belair starts running her over to pick up the pace.

Belair hits a running shooting star press to the back, followed by a double chickenwing faceplant. The 450 hits raised knees though and Banks knees her in the face, only to charge into a double powerbomb for two. The third powerbomb is countered into a faceplant and they’re both down again. Banks gets creative with a tornado DDT out of the corner and into a springboard to plant Belair for two more. A frog splash gets two and Banks sends her outside for a ram into the steps.

Back in and Banks ties Belair’s hair around Belair’s arm (ouch), followed by the Bank Statement. Somehow Belair gets over to the ropes so Banks goes up, only to miss a top rope double stomp. Belair’s 450 connects this time and the kickout has her screaming in shock. They fight over the hair and Banks gets in the whip, which sounds like a freaking rifle going off. Again, I know it’s been covered, but that’s from someone’s HAIR. How is that even possible? Anyway the KOD gives Belair the pin and the title at 17:17, with Cole screwing up and saying it’s a kickout before going into celebration mode.

Rating: B+. This turned into a fight and it felt like it belonged in the main event spot. The biggest thing here is that Belair elevated herself, which is something that had to happen. While the Four Horsewomen had done some great things, at some point you need a new generation to follow them. People like Belair were at the top of that list and this was the moment where she arrived. That hair whip spot was insane and Belair won clean, so you can’t ask for much more than that, even with Cole screwing up.

Belair celebrates to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. It’s a good show with some weak spots, though nothing really stood out as a classic/must see moment. The catch with this one was that it was all about getting to be in front of live fans, which really is a big deal after being cooped up in the Thunderdome for so many months. It’s not exactly a must see show, but there’s nothing overly terrible and it has enough good to carry things through.

Ratings Comparison

Drew McIntyre vs. Bobby Lashley

Original: B-
2022 Redo: B
2026 Redo: B

Tag Team Turmoil

Original: D
2022 Redo: D
2026 Redo: D+

Cesaro vs. Seth Rollins

Original: C+
2022 Redo: B-
2026 Redo: B

AJ Styles/Omos vs. New Day

Original: C+
2022 Redo: C
2026 Redo: C

Braun Strowman vs. Shane McMahon

Original: D
2022 Redo: D
2026 Redo: C

Miz/John Morrison vs. Bad Bunny/Damian Priest

Original: C
2022 Redo: B
2026 Redo: B-

Bianca Belair vs. Sasha Banks

Original: B
2022 Redo: B
2026 Redo: B+

Overall Rating

Original: B-
2022 Redo: B-
2026 Redo: B-

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter and Bluesky @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Wrestlemania XXI
Date: April 3, 2005
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 20,193
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz
America The Beautiful: Lilian Garcia

Then it was time to change things. In this case, that’s going to be at the hands of Batista and John Cena, who are challenging for the World Titles. There isn’t exactly much of a secret that they’re getting the belts, but that has made for some great Wrestlemania moments before. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Battle Royal

Tajiri, William Regal, Rhino, Hurricane, Rosey, Maven, Simon Dean, Gene Snitsky, Chris Masters, Val Venis, Tyson Tomko, Sylvain Grenier, Rob Conway, Viscera, Hardcore Holly, Charlie Haas, Nunzio, Billy Kidman, Mark Jindrak, Funaki, Akio, Orlando Jordan, Doug Basham, Danny Basham, Heidenreich, Luther Reigns, Booker T.. Paul London, Spike Dudley, Scotty 2 Hotty

Eh nothing wrong with getting everyone a DVD bonus credit. The Raw and Smackdown sides square off and Hurricane gives Heidenreich a mask…so Heidenreich punches him in the face as we officially start. Spike goes to the apron as there are so many people in the ring that they can’t move very much. Hurricane is out first (the fans disapprove) as Tazz talks about this being a team effort between Raw and Smackdown. I’m still not sure how but WWE would push that idea forever.

Reigns is gone too and Viscera gets knocked down, which doesn’t seem to be a great idea. Some people hold Viscera down so Scotty can hit the Worm, only for Masters to toss Scotty, Funaki and Spike in a row. Haas is out as well as the ring is at least clearing out a bit. Nunzio is on the floor but doesn’t seem to be out as things slow back down. Heidenreich (still in the mask) stops to eat a turnbuckle before clotheslining Venis out.

Dean is gone as well and Grenier follows him. There goes Rosey as Rhyno Gores Heidenreich from behind (OUCH). Rhyno is tossed out as well and Conway gets eliminated right after him to thin things out even more. The Raw and Smackdown guys square off, with Holly giving Regal an Alabama slam. Akio and Holly are tossed out and there goes Regal (who commentary doesn’t recognize). Tajiri mists Heidenreich, who can see well enough to kick London out.

Heidenreich is sent to the apron where he knocks out Tajiri before being kicked out by Snitsky. Jindrak gets rid of Snitsky as we’re down to Jindrak, Booker, Masters and Viscera. Masters dumps Jindrak and commentary tries to explain that Booker is down 2-1 because battle royals are suddenly team matches. Nunzio, who was never eliminated, comes back in and is tossed just as fast. Booker misses the side kick and gets caught in the ropes but manages to low bridge Viscera out. That leaves Booker with Masters and a superkick gives Booker the win at 11:19.

Rating: C. As usual, there’s only so much you can get out of this kind of a battle royal. It’s designed to get wrestlers on the card and it did that well enough. Booker winning is a fine way to get the crowd going and they weren’t out there very long. I could go for less of the Raw vs. Smackdown nonsense but that’s been a thing for years in WWE, even if it never really clicked.

Lilian Garcia sings America The Beautiful.

Since we’re in Los Angeles, we are officially going Hollywood and get a montage of the still incredible parody trailers, some of which are downright inspired.

We get the final trailer, featuring Steve Austin as Gladiator, which might be a stretch but getting Austin into something like this was a good move.

Commentary welcomes us to the show.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio

They’re friends and partners (even champions) but it’s time for a friendly match. No superhero for Mysterio this time as instead it’s more of a Mexican flag theme. Mysterio starts fast with a suplex but gets armdragged into an early armbar. A big catapult sends Mysterio outside but Mysterio gets back inside to avoid a baseball slide and we have a standoff.

Back in and they go to a test of strength with Mysterio’s monkey flip not getting him anywhere. Guerrero goes to a keylock to stay on the arm but Mysterio manages to get in another monkey flip. Mysterio is sent crashing outside though and the arm is banged up, which has Guerrero in a better move (as he slips into the heel role, which fit him much better).

A hard belly to back suplex sets up a surfboard, followed by an STF. That’s a bit too complicated though so Guerrero switches back to the standard armbar. Mysterio is able to send him outside though and the big twisting dive drops Guerrero again. Back in and a backbreaker puts Mysterio right back down but he’s able to block the third Amigo. The 619 is blocked as well though and Mysterio snaps off a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. More suplexes have Mysterio down but he avoids the frog splash.

They trade some rollups for two each but now Mysterio is up with the 619. After adjusting his mask (Mysterio was using a different kind of clasp here and it was driving him crazy throughout the match, with all kinds of noticeable adjustments), the West Coast Pop is countered into a powerbomb (and Mysterio adjusts the mask again). Mysterio is down but comes up with a quick hurricanrana for the pin out of nowhere at 12:23.

Rating: B-. They were in a bit of a weird spot here as they are still great friends and didn’t want to go full blast, but not going full blast at Wrestlemania doesn’t exactly fit. Guerrero was getting a bit frustrated in there and that’s a sign for the future, as these two were going to be doing this for the next few months. It’s still a good match, but it was a slow first step in a big story, which might not be the best fit for Wrestlemania.

Post match respect is shown and everything is ok.

JBL, with the Cabinet, runs into HHH, with Ric Flair. They compare greatness and JBL tells HHH to get ready to lose the title for the tenth time tonight. HHH says if JBL keeps telling people how good he is, someone will believe him eventually. They’ll see who is still champion at the end of the night. My goodness the idea of those two having a match makes my skin crawl.

Chris Jericho vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. Edge vs. Chris Benoit vs. Kane vs. Christian

And here’s something important as it’s the inaugural Money In The Bank. Benjamin is the Intercontinental Champion and Kane gets the still awesome entrance of the Hollywood set and the ladders being set on fire (even Kane seems to think it’s cool). The brawl starts in the aisle with Kane getting the better of things and going after the ladder. That’s broken up and Benoit and Benjamin suplex Kane on the floor.

Christian goes for the ladder but Jericho knocks him into the ring, which is the official start. Benjamin is in to hammer on Jericho, who knocks him right back down. A triangle dropkick hits Edge and Benoit, followed by a dive to take out the former. Christian is back in with a dive onto his three fellow Canadians. Benjamin is of course right there with an even bigger dive, followed by Kane’s dive onto everyone but Christian. Kane throws in the ladder but Jericho takes it away and gets to wreck various people.

Benoit German suplexes Jericho, sending the ladder flying in the process. Kane tries to chokeslam Benoit off the ladder but gets pulled into the Crossface. Edge breaks it up for no logical reason and gets Crossfaced as well, with Kane breaking that up as well. That’s not enough for Kane, who puts Benoit’s arm inside a ladder and crushes it a few times, only for Edge to drop Kane with a spear. Edge and Christian get back together for a bit, only for Benjamin to send Edge into a ladder in the corner.

A Stinger Splash crushed Edge against the ladder and Benjamin goes up, only for Jericho to cut him off. Christian sets up another ladder so Benoit climbs at the same time, with Edge setting up a third ladder next to them. Everyone but Kane is up until Christian pulls Benoit down with a DDT on the arm. Jericho is knocked down, leaving Benjamin to Exploder Edge down for the huge crash. Christian bridges a ladder into the standing one, with Jericho climbing up.

That lets Benjamin run up the bridge to clothesline Jericho off, sending him crashing out to the floor. Kane is back up though and it’s time to start wrecking people. Benjamin gets chokeslammed…well mostly onto the ropes as he crashes out to the floor. Christian’s lackey Tyson Tomko comes in to boot Kane but gets knocked over the top. Christian gets a hand on the briefcase but Kane shoves the ladder over, sending Christian down onto Tomko for a crazy crash (and thankfully not breaking Tomko’s leg in the process).

Kane and Jericho go up and knock each other off onto the ropes for another big spill. Benoit, with his arm dangling, goes up and Swan Dives onto Kane, which doesn’t seem so bright but that’s kind of par for the course for him. The bloody Benoit goes up but has to headbutt Kane down, only to get chaired in the arm by Edge. That’s enough for Edge to get the briefcase and win at 15:19.

Rating: B+. I still really like this one as the match hadn’t been bogged down by a bunch of cliches and having far too many people. Edge looked ruthless with the chair shot on the end and him stealing the briefcase (despite not breaking any rules) fit in perfectly. There are more than enough high spots and carnage here to make it work and it’s a rather fun bit of chaos.

Here is Eugene for a surprise appearance. He’s happy to be at Wrestlemania and talks about loving King Kong Bundy beating up a midget and the midget army getting together to go after him. This is the greatest moment of his life but here are Muhammad Hassan and Daivari to interrupt. Hassan is livid, which Eugene thinks means he doesn’t like midgets. That sends Hassan into a rant about how he isn’t on the biggest show of the year and how prejudiced Hollywood has been over the years.

He’s never lost but he has to take a backseat to EUGENE? He will not stand for this and is going to create a Wrestlemania Moment. Hassan jumps the injured Eugene and the double beatdown is on. The camel clutch is locked in….and it’s HULK HOGAN walking that aisle to an absolute roar. Hogan cleans house of the villains, including shrugging off a chair from Daivari. The ring is cleared and Hogan poses as the fans eat this all up. Yeah it still works.

We recap the Undertaker vs. Randy Orton. Over the last few weeks, Orton has tried to show more of an edge and wants to kill the biggest legend of them all. Undertaker doesn’t take kindly to this and wants to hurt someone, which can’t go well for Orton.

Undertaker vs. Randy Orton

It’s Wrestlemania so we’ve got druids (one of which might be Kofi Kingston, who implied it was him but it might have been from a segment on Smackdown). Orton circles around to start and hits a quick dropkick, followed by a backdrop. Undertaker isn’t having that and knocks him to the floor, setting up the apron legdrop. Old School connects but Orton is back up with a dropkick to knock Undertaker off the apron and hard into the barricade. Back in and Orton tries to keep things slow but ducks his head, allowing Undertaker to hit the running DDT.

The corner clothesline hits Orton, who reverses Snake Eyes with an elbow to put Undertaker back down. The forearms to the chest just wake Undertaker up, which can never be a good thing. A clothesline puts Orton down (though he didn’t seem to be ready for it) for two and Undertaker grabs the dragon sleeper that he tried really hard to get over, to limited success. It’s only good for two arm drops here, as Orton reverses into a DDT for two. The chinlock (of course) goes on, which Orton switches into a sleeper, which Undertaker breaks up with a sleeper rather quickly.

Orton’s powerslam gets two and Orton is stunned at the kickout. Dude it was a powerslam. Calm down. The Last Ride out of the corner is blocked but the referee gets bumped. Another Last Ride is loaded up but here is Cowboy Bob Orton with a cast shot to the face, naturally for two.

The ticked off Undertaker comes up swinging, only to have to kick Bob down again. The chokeslam is loaded up…and countered into the RKO for a rather delayed two (if there was ever a point to end the Streak in this era, that was 100% it, with one of the best counters ever). Ever the moron, Randy tries a Tombstone and gets reversed into the real thing for the pin at 14:06 (that’s 13-0).

Rating: B. I’ve seen this match a bunch of times and I still feel bad when the RKO doesn’t finish it off. That was a perfect place to do it but dang they didn’t go that way. That being said, it’s still a heck of a match with Undertaker getting to show that he still has it. The Streak was a thing by this point and the idea of someone trying to take it out was becoming something huge, which would only get FAR bigger over the years.

We recap Trish Stratus defending the Women’s Title against Christy Hemme. This translates to “Lita is injured and Christy is in Playboy so it’s as good as we can do”.

Women’s Title: Christy Hemme vs. Trish Stratus

Hemme, with Lita (her coach), is challenging. Stratus even lays down for her to start before coming up with a shove. The one sided beating begins but Hemme blocks a Chick Kick. Lita offers a distraction and Hemme gets in a low blow (sure) so she can stomp away. Stratus is back up and they seem to get a bit confused so Stratus fires off some chops.

Hemme starts contorting and Lawler starts cheering, with Stratus hitting a spear to send her outside. Back in and a rollup gives Hemme two and she fires off some rather bad kicks. A reverse Twist Of Fate gets two and they fight over a rollup. Stratus has had it with this and kicks her in the head (area) to retain at 4:40.

Rating: D+. Well, they tried. The problem here is very simple: Hemme isn’t a wrestler and there isn’t much that can be done to get around that reality. Lita was only so much of a factor here, but again she could only do so much. There wasn’t much they could do here and the match wasn’t good, but you can only give them so much blame.

We recap Shawn Michaels vs. Kurt Angle. Michaels eliminated him from the Royal Rumble and Angle was ticked. He even brought up being tired of hearing about Michaels when he was the best amateur wrestler in the world back in 1996 and it’s time for him to prove his amazingness. On the other hand, it’s Michaels at Wrestlemania.

Shawn Michaels vs. Kurt Angle

They stare each other down to start and Michaels slaps him in the face, only to get wrestled to the ground without much effort. Michaels goes straight over to the ropes (in the same start, minus the slap, that Michaels would have with Shelton Benjamin about a month later) and we reset a bit. A headlock slows Angle down a bit and Michaels grinds away on that for a good while.

Angle finally gets up but gets hiptossed into a short armscissors as they’re definitely starting slowly. Back up and Angle drives him into the corner, where Michaels slugs away. That’s cut off again and the referee gets a bit too physical, allowing Angle to hit a forearm to the back. The ankle lock is broken up and Michaels clotheslines him out to the floor. It’s already time to load up the announcers’ table but Angle picks Michaels up for an Angle Slam into the post (the goal was for Michaels’ back to hit but it was more his hip, with the replay not helping).

Back in and Angle snaps off the suplex, followed by the reverse chinlock. With that broken up, Angle loads up the belly to belly superplex but Michaels knocks him off. The top rope elbow misses though and Angle takes the straps down, only to have the Angle Slam countered with an armdrag. Michaels backdrops him to the floor and goes up for a crossbody, only to seemingly slip and make the landing even nastier than usual. Angle gets up to block the Asai moonsault but can’t German suplex him off the apron. Instead Michaels hits a springboard crossbody to crush Angle onto the table and they’re both down.

They barely beat the count and slowly slug it out, with Michaels hitting the forearm. Now the elbow can connect but the superkick is countered into the ankle lock (which is a pretty simple way to go but Michaels can be a bit dim at times). Michaels finally makes the rope and gets two off a rollup but the superkick is countered again. One heck of an Angle Slam gets two and Angle isn’t sure what to do. He goes intellectual by putting the straps back up so he can take them down again (that’s just brilliant) but misses a moonsault (which almost sound up being a moonsault headbutt).

Michaels goes up again and it’s a super Angle Slam for two, with the fans losing it on the kickout. Angle yells at him a lot and gets superkicked for his efforts. Michaels finally gets the cover but Angle gets the shoulder up at the last half second, with the fans not being pleased. They slowly get up and Angle snatches the ankle lock, with Michaels rolling around but he can’t escape. Angle even gets the grapevine and Michaels still hangs on for the better part of two minutes (GEEZ) before tapping at 27:30.

Rating: A-. That ending is one of the only things that holds this one back as otherwise it’s an absolute classic. This is one of those pairings where you can just put them in the ring and you know it’s going to be magic, which is exactly what happened here. The double strap pull down is still great and the match holds up rather well. I mean…it’s Michaels vs. Angle for almost half an hour at Wrestlemania. What more do you want?

And after that, let’s have Piper’s Pit. Piper thanks the fans for the honor of the Hall Of Fame, despite them not really having much to do with it. As for tonight, he wanted to talk to the baddest, meanest, low downest rattlesnake son of an unnamed goat in WWE. Who is the biggest rebel in WWE? Steve Austin? BULLS***!

Piper has to see this guy in person so here is Austin, for the first time in a good while. Austin gets in the ring, where Piper welcomes him to the Pit and then slaps him. Austin thanks Piper and slaps him right back. Piper: “I kinda like ya!” Piper says he respects Austin and is immediately thrown off by the WHAT chants. He likes what Austin has done with Vince McMahon over the years (and starts getting the rhythm right to deal with the chants) but he was here when Wrestlemania didn’t even have a number.

Piper agrees on everything else, but when it comes to being a rebel, Austin has nothing on him. Austin mocks Piper’s fashion sense and says he isn’t intimidated whatsoever. Piper goes to respond but Austin tells him to think about it…and here’s Carlito to be in WAY over his head. Austin and Piper accuse the other of having a plan but Carlito says they’re slapping each other like little girls. Neither of them are cool and everyone wants to see Carlito. Piper calls Carlito “Alfalfa” for his out of date reference of the night.

Carlito wants both of them out of here and loads up the apple, which Piper takes. Instead Piper takes a bite of the apple and spits it at Carlito, who comes up swinging. Austin makes the save and hits the Stunner on Carlito. Piper throws Carlito out, beer is consumed, and Piper gets Stunned too. All in all, a pretty complete wast of time as they didn’t have anything to say to each other and Austin didn’t seem to care.

Akebono vs. Big Show

This is a sumo match and the fans are basically silent for Akebono, mainly because he has nothing to do with WWE. The whole point of this is to have the sight gag of Big Show in a thong and that’s about it. They do the big ceremonial start, they grapple, Show almost gets him out, Akebono does get him out at 1:01. This was a thing that happened.

We recap JBL defending the Smackdown World Title against John Cena. It’s a straight up culture clash as JBL is the old school rich Texan while Cena is the modern star who had the spinner title and wears throwback jerseys. Cena won a tournament and the match was on, but they weren’t allowed to have any physical contact. Therefore, they both tormented the other to ramp up some tension.

Smackdown World Title: John Cena vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

Cena is challenging while JBL gets a police motorcade and JBL bucks rain down from the ceiling. Cena starts fast with a running shoulder for a knockdown but JBL gets a boot up in the corner. That means JBL can hit his own running shoulder and Cena is in trouble for a change. The slow beating ensues, including JBL grabbing a swinging neckbreaker for two.

Back up and JBL chokes on the ropes before Cena tries to fight back, only to charge into a spinebuster for two more. There’s another neckbreaker for another two, followed by a short arm clothesline for the same. JBL forearms him in the back and grabs the sleeper, with Cena finally suplexing his way out of trouble.

A double clothesline puts both of them down but Cena is sent crashing out to the floor. Back in and JBL takes him up top for the superplex but goes for a high crossbody for some reason, earning a powerslam out of the air. Cena initiates the comeback and it’s the ProtoBomb into the Shuffle. JBL gets a boot up in the corner but misses the Clothesline, allowing Cena to hit the FU for his first World Title at 11:27.

Rating: C. Yeah it’s historic as Cena gets the win to end the JBL title reign, but at the end of the day, it was a pretty boring match. JBL just could not back it up in the ring and that was on display here. Cena tried as hard as he could and had the fire in his eyes, but JBL never even had a big near fall to build some drama. Cena wins clean, but that’s all there was here and that didn’t quite carry it to greatness.

Post match Cena celebrates in the crowd in a clip that was on a lot of highlight reels.

We go to the Hall Of Fame induction ceremony from last night, with Hulk Hogan headlining and Roddy Piper getting in a nice speech. Iron Sheik doing his rambling and raving and Bobby Heenan going “WHAT THE H*** DID HE JUST SAY???” was great too.

Gene Okerlund presents the class of 2005:

Nikolai Volkoff (unfortunately not in the brown suit)
Iron Sheik (makes sense)
Paul Orndorff (who apparently intentionally left his plaque in his hotel room because it was cheap)
Bob Orton Jr. (the arm seems healed)
Jimmy Hart (you have to have him)
Roddy Piper (yep)
Hulk Hogan (they’re probably not here without him)

We recap HHH defending the Raw World Title against Batista. They’ve been part of Evolution together but Batista has become a star, while HHH is still the focal point. It became clear that HHH only cared about keeping himself as the star but then Batista won the Royal Rumble. Before he could decide who to challenge, he overheard HHH and Ric Flair mocking him, which was enough for him to make the decision to challenge HHH. The thumbs up turning into a thumbs down as he chose to come after HHH is still great stuff.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Batista

HHH, with Ric Flair, is defending and is played to the ring by Motorhead, with Lemmy mostly butchering the words. To be fair, it’s still a pretty awesome entrance and the belt looks extra shiny. Unfortunately this is before Batista got I Walk Alone so his entrance doesn’t have the same impact. We get an old school weapons check and we’re ready to go. They take turns shoving each other to start with Batista getting a bit of an advantage with the power game.

HHH’s running shoulder doesn’t work as Batista knocks him down so we’ll try a headlock instead. An early Pedigree attempt is countered into quite the slam and HHH needs to cool off a bit. Back up and HHH goes with the simple idea of hitting Batista in the face but Batista gives him a backdrop. The jumping knee puts Batista outside again, where Flair’s distraction lets HHH send Batista into the steps.

Back in and HHH chokes away so Flair does the same, with Lawler not seeing anything wrong with it. HHH rams Batista’s back into the barricade a few times and starts hammering away on it back inside. Some knees to the back set up a backbreaker and Flair chokes away again (JR losing it is great). Batista fights out of the corner but walks into the spinebuster for two. The neckbreaker gets two more but another Pedigree attempt is countered with a backdrop.

HHH facebusters him for two and goes up, only to get clotheslined out of the air. A sidewalk slam gives Batista two but he charges into a boot in the corner. Batista is fine enough to throw HHH into the corner and over the top for a big crash outside. Batista follows in a not so bright move and gets sent into the steps, with HHH taking him onto those steps for a Pedigree attempt. That’s countered into a catapult into the post and we’ve got the fastest bleeding in history.

HHH’s bleeding head is rammed into more steps before they get back inside, where Batista has that look in his eyes. Batista just unloads with forearms to the cut, followed by a running corner clothesline. It works so well that Batista does it again, followed by a powerslam for two. HHH staggers out to the floor, where Flair’s distraction lets him grab a chair.

The referee takes it away but gets bumped in the process, allowing Flair to grab the belt. That earns him a spinebuster back inside so the referee gets rid of him, allowing HHH to get in a belt shot for two. Batista is back with the spinebuster but HHH goes low. The Pedigree is blocked AGAIN, with Batista even breaking HHH’s grip for a cool visual. Batista powers him up for an Air Raid Crash of all things and it’s thumbs down. The Batista Bomb finishes HHH at 21:34.

Rating: B. The goal here was to make Batista look like a huge deal and put him over for the World Title on the biggest stage of them all. That worked and it worked very well. You really couldn’t have asked for the result to be much better, though the match itself didn’t quite get all the way to greatness. It’s perfectly good though and that’s enough to get by, especially with the right result.

Post match Batista glares at HHH and Flair as they leave. Batista poses as the pyro goes off (that was on the opening highlight package for a long time).

The big highlight package wraps us up.

Overall Rating: B+. Again, the goal of this show was to get Cena and Batista over as the new generation and that happened. Everything else is pretty much a big bonus, with only the Women’s Title and sumo matches being downgrades. Angle vs. Michaels is pretty easily the match of the night, with some other rather good stuff included. I liked this more than I thought I would and it’s a rather strong show, with the big goal being more than accomplished.

 

 

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Wrestlemania XIX
Date: March 30, 2003
Location: Safeco Field, Seattle, Washington
Attendance: 54,097
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz

This one is very interesting as the TV leading up to the show has been a cross between boring and really bad, yet the show has one of the best reputations of all time. I’m really curious to see how it goes from such a bad build to such a great show, especially with so much emphasis on Hulk Hogan vs. Vince McMahon. Let’s get to it.

Sunday Night Heat: Raw Tag Team Titles: Rob Van Dam/Kane vs. Lance Storm/Chief Morely

Morely and Storm are defending with Morely acting as the new champion due to William Regal being injured. The Dudleys are on the floor in forced servitude to Morely and Eric Bischoff. Van Dam kicks Morely out to the floor to start and it’s Kane diving onto the champs for a cool visual as we take a break. Back with the champs in control and Morely grabbing a chinlock. The Blue Thunder Bomb gets two as the announcers rip on Morely. The Money Shot misses and it’s off to Kane for the house cleaning.

Storm breaks out of a chokeslam and gets caught in a tilt-a-whirl slam for two. There’s the top rope clothesline for two with Morely making the save, only to eat a jumping kick to the face. The chokeslam looks to set up the Five Star but Rob comes inside before jumping to the top. Morely shoves him off, which makes me think there was some mistiming there. The distraction lets the Dudleys hit a 3D on Storm….and an elbow on Van Dam so the champs can retain the titles.

Rating: D+. That’s certainly how you warm a crowd up. If ever there was a time for an easy title change to give the fans something to cheer for, it should have been this right here. When you consider how soon Kane and Van Dam would get the titles anyway, this really seems like a big head scratcher.

The opening video shows wrestlers getting ready with a collection of voiceovers talking about how important this one night really is. This treats the event with a lot more respect and it’s quite the effective idea. It shows that everyone is in awe of the event itself and makes it feel even bigger.

And now, the theme song Crack Addict. So much for the respect part.

Cruiserweight Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Matt Hardy

Matt, defending here and accompanied by Shannon Moore, is appearing in his fourth Wrestlemania and often wonders how they did Wrestlemania without him. Mysterio is dressed like Daredevil, starting the awesome tradition of dressing like a superhero (most of the time) at Wrestlemania.

Matt is sent outside early on and Rey busts out a corkscrew dive to take both of them down. Rey can’t hit a sunset bomb to the floor so Matt drops him onto the barricade to take over. The Ricochet gets two as Tazz talks about Matt being off the banana juice and moving to tea. The Twist of Fate is countered into a rollup but Matt grabs the Side Effect for two. As Cole talks about loving latex and teabagging (seriously), Matt misses a charge into the post and Rey gets two off a crossbody.

Shannon breaks up the 619 though and now the Twist of Fate gets two. Splash Mountain is loaded up but Rey reverses with a hurricanrana for two more. Shannon makes the save so Rey takes him down before hitting the 619 on Matt. The West Coast Pop is broken up though and Matt grabs a rollup and the rope to retain.

Rating: C+. This was a good choice for an opener as you want something fast paced but don’t want to overstay your welcome. They were in and out in less than six minutes, which is pretty close to the sweet spot for an opener. Mysterio winning probably would have been the better option but at least he didn’t get the title a week later or something like that.

The Miller Lite Catfight Girls are here. I’m with Lance Storm: it’s nonsense that these two got time and the seven minute Tag Team Title match got stuck on Heat.

Nathan Jones was laid out earlier tonight.

Limp Bizkit plays Undertaker to the ring. Again, Tag Team Titles on Heat in a short match but time for this.

Undertaker vs. A-Train/Big Show

A-Train messes with Undertaker’s bike on the way to the ring. If I had a dollar for every time a hairy chested man with nipple piercings adjusted the mirror on my motorcycle….well I’d be poor as I don’t have a motorcycle but the rest happens more often than you would think. Show tries a sneak attack but gets sent to the floor so Undertaker can chokeslam A-Train for two.

Undertaker actually leapfrogs A-Train and drops him with Old School as they’re certainly moving in the early going. A Derailer cuts Undertaker off and Show posts him for good measure. It’s off to Show whose chokeslam is countered into a Fujiwara armbar. A-Train’s save is countered into a cross armbreaker so Show gets to make a save of his own. We hit an abdominal stretch as Cole wants to know if Undertaker’s stamina is going to hold up after such a long layoff due to injury. We’re four minutes into the match and Undertaker has been back from injury for almost TWO AND A HALF MONTHS Cole, you pathetic nitwit.

A-Train puts on an abdominal stretch of his own and Tazz shows how to do his job by suggesting things Undertaker should do to escape/relieve the pressure. I get that they have different jobs but at least Tazz is saying stuff that makes sense and doesn’t sound stupid. A-Train talks trash and throws some punches until Undertaker mostly misses the running DDT (he was barely touching A-Train).

Running corner clotheslines have the monsters in trouble until A-Train gets in the bicycle kick. Show hits his chokeslam but here’s Nathan Jones in the aisle to kick Show’s head off. A-Train takes a big boot from Jones (because the referee doesn’t understand disqualifications) and the Tombstone is enough for the pin.

Rating: C-. Actually not a bad power match here as I can buy the idea of Undertaker holding his own against these two for eight minutes, especially after he’s shown he can beat them both on his own. The fact that Jones couldn’t even be trusted to wait for people to run into his kicks is incredibly telling and pretty much spells the end of his career.

The Catfight Girls meet Stacy Keibler and Torrie Wilson, who are standing around looking at Torrie’s Playboy. As various gorgeous women just do. Stacy has a new marketing campaign idea for them and they all leave together.

We take a quick look at the Tag Team Title match from Heat. Add this to the stuff that could have been cut in exchange of just airing the match.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Victoria vs. Jazz

Victoria is defending and it’s one fall to a finish. Jazz jumps the champ from behind to start fast and it’s already time for a modified Muta Lock on Trish. Trish gets knocked outside as Lawler thinks this should turn into a love triangle. Back in and Victoria hits her slingshot legdrop for two on Trish but has to powerslam Jazz for two.

It’s back to Trish as JR tries to figure out why King called her a quarter among pennies. A sitout powerslam gives Jazz two on Trish but it’s time for a fight with her fellow villain. Jazz kicks Victoria down but gets rolled up for two, followed by the Chick Kick for the same. Victoria gets sent outside, leaving Trish to get caught in the STF.

With Victoria distracting the referee, Richards breaks up the hold so Victoria and Trish can trade rollups (with Victoria’s tights being pulled rather low) for two each. Jazz gets knocked outside, leaving Richards to swing a chair but hit the top rope and knock it back into his own head. The Chick Kick to Victoria gives Trish the title back at 7:18.

Rating: C. Not bad at all here as they kept things tight and had everyone moving the entire time, including Richards with the chair to his own head. It made Trish look like the one who survived until the end, though at some point she’s going to have to beat Jazz. You can do that later though as this was all about getting her the title and I’d prefer her to pin the champ than the other challenger.

Rock doesn’t want to hear about the people because they’ve been booing him and calling him a sellout. It’s true that he’s a sellout because he sells out every Wrestlemania he’s in. Rock has lost to Austin twice at Wrestlemania but Hollywood has taught him that the third act is all that matters.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Los Guerreros vs. Chris Benoit/Rhyno vs. Team Angle

Team Angle is defending and it’s one fall to a finish. The challenging team both beat on a champ until it settles down to Chavo vs. Haas. A dropkick puts Charlie down and it’s off to Benoit, who runs into an armdrag from Guerrero. Eddie comes in with the slingshot hilo but they ram heads for a double knockdown.

Benoit brings Rhyno in to powerslam Eddie and it’s already off to Benjamin as they’re keeping the pace fast here. A double dropkick gets two on Rhyno but Haas gets taken into the Rhyno corner for a double stomping. Eddie stomps on Rhyno and gets taken into the same corner that Haas got caught in. Benoit catches Eddie on the top with a superplex for two as Benjamin makes the save.

That’s fine with Chris who throws Eddie into the air and pulls him down into the Crossface for a sweet move but Haas makes a save this time. Chavo and Haas come in and everything breaks down. The rolling German suplexes have Chavo in trouble but Benoit walks into a superkick from Benjamin. A legdrop gets two with Eddie dropping a frog splash for the save. Haas suplexes Chavo but turns into the Gore. Chavo eats one as well, only to have Benjamin steal the pin to retain the titles at 8:46.

Rating: B-. I don’t remember liking this one this much but they didn’t stop for the entire match. Benoit and Rhyno are still an odd choice for a tag team but it wouldn’t surprise me if they were setting up for Benoit and Edge in this spot before he got hurt. Team Angle needed this win and that’s the right call out of the three options.

Torrie and Stacy get in a fight over whether Vince or Hulk created Wrestlemania. The Catfight Girls do the same (though one of them keeps calling him Holgan) and agree to settle this in bed.

King is mesmerized.

We recap Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho. Chris seems jealous that Shawn is back and getting attention. He’s wanted to be the next Shawn Michaels but now he wants to be the first Chris Jericho by defeating Shawn at Wrestlemania. This has been a long build but they’ve been smart to wait until here for the match. Shawn accepted the challenge with a superkick and telling Jericho that he would see him at Wrestlemania in a moment I always liked.

Chris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels

Shawn tries to fire some confetti cannons on the way to the ring but some of them fail to go off, prompting an “eh what are you going to do” look. Jericho on the other hand just looks down at him in disdain in the perfect response. Some early armdrags frustrate Jericho so Shawn lounges on the top rope.

Back up and Shawn kicks him away without too much effort as they’re still firmly in first gear. Jericho is ready for a leapfrog and slaps Shawn in the face, earning himself a right hand to the jaw and a trip to the floor. Back in and Jericho scores with a spinwheel kick but a bulldog is countered with a good crotching. We hit a random Figure Four but Jericho reverses pretty quickly.

They head outside again with Shawn hitting a nice plancha, only to get caught in the Walls in the aisle. The bad back is sent into the post as Jericho has a big target to work with now. Back in and Jericho yells about how he’s better than Shawn as he stays on the back in a variety of ways. We hit the chinlock with a knee in the back before Shawn grabs a DDT to get him out of trouble.

Jericho nips up and hits the forearm into Shawn’s pose, which you just don’t do at Wrestlemania. Shawn makes his comeback (with two nipups of his own) and we hit the pinfall reversal sequence (as required by a classic like this) for a couple of twos each. Jericho is Lionsault for two more before countering a hurricanrana into the Walls. Shawn grabs the rope so Jericho elbows him in the jaw and tunes up the band.

Sweet Chin Music puts Shawn down for two and the fans seemed to buy that as the finish. Shawn teases the Walls but goes with a catapult into the post for two instead. It’s Jericho up first with a belly to back superplex but Shawn reverses into a crossbody in mid-air for yet another near fall.

The top rope elbow gets the same but the real Sweet Chin Music is countered into the Walls again. Just like last time, Shawn grabs the ropes though this time he follows up with more Chin Music for a very delayed two. Both guys are spent so Jericho grabs a belly to back suplex, only to have Shawn flip over and grab a rollup with his legs for the pin at 22:31.

Rating: A. Oh come on like this one needs an explanation. These two were both on fire here and just had an awesome match. It’s the match that made it clear Shawn had more than just a few performances in him as he felt a lot more like the older version here, which is exactly what the match needed to be. Jericho being able to do every athletic thing Shawn could do but not be able to outsmart him is a perfect story in a similar vein to Shawn vs. Shelton Benjamin a few years later. Great match here and one of the best Shawn had in his comeback.

They hug post match but Jericho kicks him low like the heel he is.

The evil referee from Montreal goes to see Vince.

The new attendance record is announced.

Limp Bizkit takes their sweet time performing Crack Addict.

Here are the Catfight Girls to fight on a bed set up on stage. Cue Stacy and Torrie to join in. Girls are stripped, pillows are swung and Coach is pantsed and pinned. Again, World Tag Team Titles not on the show but these girls get like four segments.

We recap HHH vs. Booker T. which focuses on Booker’s criminal past. That’s firmly established before the “someone like you doesn’t deserve to be World Champion” line is made. It’s a better way to go about it but there’s no good way to spin that statement. Basically Booker is fighting for his one big moment and HHH is defending because….well because it’s Wrestlemania and what else is he supposed to do?

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Booker T.

HHH is defending and comes out first for some reason. JR talks about Booker becoming a five time WCW Champion so King says that place was a joke. JR: “How long did you work there?” King: “Never.” JR: “Well I did.” King: “Was it a joke?” JR: “D*** right.” A hard lockup takes them into the corner where they trade chops and some right hands. Booker charges into a boot to the face and HHH goes up top, only to get armdragged down. You would think Flair would have taught him better but if Ric never learned, HHH didn’t need to either.

The announcers bicker over whether or not Booker was born on a pool table which turns into a discussion of Fink being drunk last night. Booker gets sent outside and goes into the steps as the pace slows a lot (yes, in a HHH match). A neckbreaker gets two on Booker and a spinebuster gets the same.

Booker slips out of a suplex and grabs a DDT for his first offense in a long time. The jumping knee and a facebuster cut Booker off but he comes back with a spinebuster. HHH goes up again for some reason and dives into a boot to the face. Seriously they never learn. The scissors kick only hits ropes and Booker falls out to the floor as he was getting dangerously close to beating up HHH and that must be stopped.

Flair sends Booker’s knee into the steps and it’s time for an Indian Deathlock back inside as we flash back to 1974. Back up and the knee is done but Booker grabs a sunset flip for a fast two. A jumping elbow to the jaw puts HHH down again and there’s the ax kick for no cover.

Flair’s distraction has no effect as Booker hits the Houston Hangover, which thankfully isn’t followed up on because the knee gives out again. They stagger to their feet with Booker’s knee preventing him from trying another ax kick. Instead it’s the Pedigree, the completely ridiculous 24 second wait, and then the pin with one hand over Booker’s chest to retain the title at 18:44.

Rating: C+. And there goes Booker’s main event career for the next few years. Aside from being a somewhat boring match, that ending is unforgivable. There’s no reason to not give Booker the title here, even if it’s just until Backlash. The leg stuff at the end was better but this was WAY too much HHH with Booker only having a few hope spots here and there. He didn’t even get the big two count at any point. This was all about HHH establishing that he is the one and only star on Raw no matter what and that’s a major problem. Booker needed this win, or at least anything other than a clean loss.

Long recap of Hulk Hogan vs. Vince McMahon for the show’s real main event. Basically Vince suddenly decided that he hated Hogan for leaving the company ten years ago and testifying against him in the steroids trial so they had to have a fight. This was suddenly elevated to the biggest match of all time despite there not really being a clear reason why Vince started hating Hogan in the first place. If it was mentioned at the start, it was completely bogged down in all the mess that followed. This is at worst the second biggest match on the show and while not surprising, that’s probably not the best idea in the world.

Hulk Hogan vs. Vince McMahon

Street fight and if Hogan loses, he has to retire. Hogan “spears” Vince down because that’s the kind of thing Hogan is known to do. Some slow motion (expect to hear that a lot in this one) right hands have Vince in trouble and Hulk stomps him in the corner. A clothesline gives Vince a breather and he throws those awkward punches. Now it’s off to an armbar because that’s what you want to see from these two in a street fight.

Hogan fights out of the test of strength but Vince is smart enough to kick him in the gut. That’s so effective that they do it three straight times before Vince sends him outside. Hogan gets posted but still manages to avoid a chair shot. Instead it’s Hulk chairing Vince in the head and of course we’ve got some blood (you knew that was coming and you know it’s coming from Hulk too).

More chair shots have Vince reeling, though not enough to knock him out, because Vince is more manly than your average wrestler. Another chair shot hits the Spanish announcer in the head because this match needed additional casualties. Vince low blows him and gets in his own chair shot to draw Hogan’s blood as this is already dragging. And now…..it’s ladder time, which certainly picks things up a bit.

A monitor shot to the head puts Hogan on the table and Vince climbs up, puts his hand to his ear, and drops a leg (which doesn’t hit Hogan but it’s a great visual nonetheless) to destroy the table and freak the crowd out all over again. Vince throws Hogan inside and grabs a pipe from underneath the ring. In the visual of the match, Vince very slowly raises his bloody head over the apron and gives the kind of evil smile that only he can pull off. It’s a great shot too and makes up for a lot of this match.

Hogan hits him low to put both guys down….and here’s Roddy Piper, looking so out of shape that he makes Hogan look great. Piper teases hitting both of them before knocking Hogan out with the pipe (Why this is considered a surprise is beyond me. They’re mortal enemies whose feud was the reason for the first Wrestlemania main event. Why was him attacking Hogan ever in doubt?).

That’s only good for two so Vince beats up the referee, drawing out the evil referee from earlier in the night, along with a regular referee. Vince pipes Hogan again, giving us that flopping around like a fish selling. It’s Hulk Up time with Hulk beating up both Vince and the evil referee. The big boot and three legdrops finish Vince at 20:48.

Rating: C-. I’ve seen this match several times and it’s actually grown on me a lot. The expectations were through the floor coming in and it’s a pretty fun old people brawl. It’s dumb, goofy fun and while it’s WAY too long (you could easily cut eight minutes if not more), it’s one of those matches where you knew what you were getting and that’s exactly what was delivered. Vince’s complete over the top visuals made it even better. It’s not good of course but it’s fun, which is a lot more important for something like this.

Hogan poses as Shane comes out to check on his father. We get a staredown but Hogan seems to understand that he doesn’t have any issues with Shane.

You can already hear Cole’s voice giving out.

We recap Steve Austin vs. The Rock. This is ALL about Rock as Austin is on fumes and it’s not exactly a secret. Basically Rock is ticked off about being booed last year in Toronto and turned into the most amazing heel in the world as a result. The only thing he has left to do in his career is beat Austin at Wrestlemania and this is probably his last chance. This gets the music video treatment but it can only get so far when one person is doing 90% of the work in the feud (not really a criticism of Austin but Rock was just on another planet at this point).

Steve Austin vs. The Rock

Writing that one never gets old. The camera follows Austin from behind in a pretty unique shot which works quite well. They stare each other down to start with Austin hitting the first right hands. The threat of a Stunner sends Rock bailing to the floor so Austin beats him over the announcers’ table and whips him into the steps.

Back in and Austin chokes a bit (that’s somewhat out of character) and gets two off a suplex. Rock gets in a chop block to get a breather with Austin bailing out to the floor. The kicks to the leg have Austin staggering around and Rock wraps the leg around the post. We hit the Sharpshooter with Austin fighting to the ropes as you can really feel the lack of fire in this one.

It’s intense but it’s clear that Austin doesn’t have that high gear anymore. The leg is wrapped around the post again and Rock grabs Austin’s vest. That’s too much for Austin so it’s some bad punches and a double clothesline for another breather. The Thesz press and middle finger elbow get two as Austin is getting some fire going.

A Rock Bottom gives Austin two but Rock comes back with a Stunner. Austin grabs the real thing for two more but Rock cuts him off with a low blow. The vest comes off and the People’s Elbow gets two. The Rock Bottom gets the same, followed by two more to FINALLY put Austin away at 17:55.

Rating: B+. I know there were outside circumstances (Austin spent the previous night in the hospital due to drinking too much alcohol and caffeine) but this would have felt so much bigger as the main event. It’s a very good match and feels big at times but when you have the history that these two have, nothing is going to live up to that standard.

Austin not being able to keep up with Rock was a great way to show that Rock was the better man that night and even with the fire not as hot as before, Austin is still worth seeing at any point. This is another one that’s grown on me and while it might not be as great, it felt important, which is what matters most here.

After thanking Austin for what happened (not audibly but he’s since said that’s what was he was doing), Rock leaves Austin for the big hero’s sendoff. This wasn’t billed as Austin’s farewell but it turned out to be his retirement match. It would have been a great way to close the show, but I get the idea of not wanting that to be the case if Austin couldn’t go. It’s a bit of a disappointment but at least he got the big moment.

We recap Brock Lesnar vs. Kurt Angle. Brock got cheated out of the title at Survivor Series and has gone on a path of destruction to get it back, including winning the Royal Rumble. Angle has used every possible way out of facing him but tonight he’s out of escapes and has nothing left to do but fight. The fact that his neck is being held together by paperclips and duct tape is just a detail because Angle has a low level of sanity. This feels like a major showdown, which is all you can ask for out of the main event of Wrestlemania.

Smackdown World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Brock Lesnar

Lesnar, with bad ribs, is challenging and can win the title via DQ or countout. Angle grabs a front facelock but Brock throws him off and we’re back to a standoff. Kurt’s headlock has about the same effect but he breaks up Brock’s armbar. Lesnar grabs a powerslam, only to get caught in the first German suplex. Brock pops right to his feet though, sending Angle bailing to the floor as they’re not laying into each other just yet.

Back in and a gorilla press (Tazz: “The vanilla gorilla!”) plants Angle, who cuts off a charge with a boot. A German suplex into the corner messes with the ribs again and it’s off to something like an STF from the side. Angle lets go of the legs and switches to something closer to a Bank Statement. Brock won’t tap so Angle suplexes him with ease. That earns him a spinebuster though, which Angle is crazy to take with such a bad neck.

Brock hits his own suplexes but Angle pops up and rolls some German suplexes of his own. Neither finisher can hit so Angle trips him into the ankle lock. Brock grabs the rope….which doesn’t count for no apparent reason. Instead Angle switches to a half crab, followed by a running knee to the back. Brock backdrops him to the floor, again because Angle is freaking nuts.

Back in and the Angle Slam gets two, which Cole says has never happened before. I find that very hard to believe. The F5 gets two more but Kurt gets the ankle lock with a grapevine. Brock manages to drag him over to the ropes for the break, followed by another F5. Instead of covering though, Brock heads up top.

In one of the scariest moments in wrestling history, Brock tries a shooting star press (apparently suggested by Johnny Ace) but leaves it short, landing square on his head and knocking himself completely silly. With his eyes glazed over, Brock hits a third F5 for the pin and the title at 21:09.

Rating: A-. This started off rather slowly but then picked up the pace to become one heck of a hard hitting fight. Angle did everything he could with all the suplexes and left it all in the ring in what might have been his last match. Lesnar did everything he needed to do (save for hitting that shooting star) and if he had nailed the finish, this would go up several notches. It’s a great finish and the kind of main event that Smackdown should have put on at this point. Excellent match.

Lesnar is GONE as he tries to pull himself up.

A long highlight package ends the show.

Overall Rating: A. The more I watch this show, the more I appreciate it. There’s nothing bad on the card with the worst match being either Undertaker vs. Big Show/A-Train or the street fight and even those are watchable. There’s also a great selection of top matches, though HHH vs. Booker leaves a lot to be desired. That being said, Jericho vs. Shawn, Rock vs. Austin and the main event are more than enough to make this a classic.

My main issue is still the same: the show could use a breather between all of the top matches. I could have gone for swapping in say the women’s triple threat or the Smackdown Tag Team Title match in between the street fight and Rock vs. Austin, just for the sake of a little breathing room. The way it’s done is more than fine though and it would only have been improved with a few tweaks.

Overall, it’s one of the best Wrestlemanias ever but I can’t put it above or really near the level of X7. There’s some great stuff here but it’s not enough to top everything that show has to offer. I could easily see this being the second best Wrestlemania of all time (it’s in the top three or four at the absolute worst) and that’s some pretty high levels of quality.

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Wrestlemania XVIII
Date: March 17, 2002
Location: SkyDome, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 68,237
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

I say advertised because there’s a match on the card that really is the main event. Back in February, the New World Order debuted in the WWF, meaning Kevin Nash (Diesel), Scott Hall (Razor Ramon) and Hulk Hogan himself made their returns. Hogan got right to the point as well, accepting a Wrestlemania showdown with the Rock. Let’s get to it.

Sunday Night Heat: Scotty 2 Hotty/Albert/Rikishi vs. Mr. Perfect/Test/Lance Storm

Storm is a serious Canadian wrestler and Albert now enjoys dancing under the nickname the Hip Hop Hippo. Perfect returned at the Royal Rumble and had a short but nice run. Jacqueline is guest referee here. Albert quickly charges into raised boots in the corner but comes back with a quick powerbomb for two.

It’s off to Test for some hard right hands to Scotty in the corner but Storm comes in and gives up the hot tag to Rikishi. Everything breaks down and Rikishi cleans house, eventually crushing Perfect in the corner. Perfect is ready though and blocks the Stink Face with his towel. That’s not cool with Rikishi so he sits on Perfect’s chest for the pin at 3:06.

Rating: D+. Another nothing match here but the popular team won and gave the people something to cheer for. This didn’t have time to go anywhere and again that’s probably the right idea for a warmup match. The dancing guys were over and a fun act so why not let them beat up three guys with nothing else going on?

Dancing ensues post match.

Instead of O Canada, Saliva opens the show with the theme song Superstar. This eats up four minutes of the show, which is likely time that other matches could use later on. At least it wasn’t a rock version of America the Beautiful.

The opening video, narrated by Undertaker of all people to start, talks about how this is the biggest night of the year. Other names talk about how big this show is and they treat it like the only thing that matters all year. This fits well with the tagline of the show “The One And Only.” The only matches discussed are Hogan vs. Rock and HHH vs. Jericho, which are the only ones that really deserve attention.

Just like last year, it’s a sea of people that just keeps going. That never gets old.

Intercontinental Title: Rob Van Dam vs. William Regal

Regal is defending and Van Dam debuted last year during the Invasion. Rob starts with a quick spinning kick to the face so Regal already loads up his trademark brass knuckles. Van Dam is ready though and kicks them off his hand, only to miss an early Five Star Frog Splash attempt. A suplex and the Regal Cutter (arm trap neckbreaker) get two each for the champ and we hit the chinlock.

That goes nowhere other than to show that Regal has a bloody lip so he tiger bombs Rob for two. Rob fights back and (on the second try after some mistiming) monkey flips Regal out of the corner. A hard half nelson suplex sends Rob out to the floor. The referee checks to make sure that Rob isn’t dead so Regal pulls out the knuckles, only to get kicked in the face, setting up the Five Star to give Rob the pin and the title at 6:20.

Rating: C. This went fine and was a nice way to get the show going. Rob was a fun act and one of the more popular guys on the roster at this point so giving him a title win in a quick match made sense. Regal is still a great choice for a midcard heel who can lose, get built up again in no time, and be evil all over again.

We recap Christian attacking Diamond Dallas Page (former WCW World Champion) after Page helped him win a match. Page had helped Christian get over a losing streak and now Christian doesn’t need him. Christian says he’s over his temper tantrums, just like he’s over this stupid city and now lives in Florida. He’s ready to get his European Title back and that’s not a good thing for Page.

European Title: Diamond Dallas Page vs. Christian

Page is defending and is a really happy motivational speaker with shiny teeth. Christian is finally free from Edge or any other partners, giving us this awesome opening to his theme song, sung in an operatic style: “CHRISTIAN! CHRISTIAN! AT LAST YOU ARE ON YOUR OWN!” Christian goes after the champ to start but Page comes back with a gutwrench gutbuster. Some right hands are in the corner are broken up by a Christian low blow. For some reason the referee didn’t think much of Page’s face going from normal to looking like someone had hit him low very hard in a split second.

Page pays him back by trying to crotch him against the post but Christian pulls him into the steel instead. A reverse DDT into a backbreaker gets two for Christian so he goes up top, only to have Page climb to the bottom rope for a press slam. Page can’t hit the Diamond Cutter though so Christian grabs a backbreaker for two. That almost drives him to a fit but he doesn’t have time as the Diamond Cutter retains Page’s title at 6:10.

Rating: D. Not much to see here as Page really didn’t have a following in the WWF because he was such a homegrown WCW star. Christian was in a weird place here as he wasn’t rising up the card like Edge and was really just one half of a tag team without a partner. The match didn’t do anything for me but the Diamond Cutter always works. Page would lose the title to Regal later in the week.

Post match Page laughs at Christian but says he’s proud that there was no tantrum in front of SIXTY SEVEN THOUSAND PEOPLE. Christian of course snaps in a funny moment.

Rock talks about this being a huge match and he wants Hulkamania at its peak tonight. He asks interviewer Jonathan Coachman (Coach) if he took his vitamins this morning. Coach did, but he didn’t say his prayers. That’s not good enough for Rock so he wants Coach to say his prayers right now. Rock demands that Coach put his hands together and get on his knees to pray.

Coach: “What up G? It’s Coach here. I just wanted to give you a quick shout out.” Rock: “WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU???” He literally kicks Coach out and asks what Hogan is going to do when the Rock runs wild on him. Hogan is going to hear the people, he’s going to feel the People’s Elbow and good God almighty he will smell what the Rock is cooking. This was pure Rock charisma and it never gets old, just like Rock picking on Coach.

Hardcore Title: Goldust vs. Maven

Maven, defending here, won Tough Enough eliminated Undertaker from the 2002 Royal Rumble. Goldust quickly knocks Maven to the floor to start and drops an elbow from the apron. Back in and Maven dropkicks a gold trashcan into Goldust’s face for two but a neckbreaker gets the same on the champion. Now it’s time for a golden shovel to Maven’s throat but both guys connect with a trashcan lid to the head. Cue Spike Dudley with his own referee to pin Maven and win the Hardcore Title via the 24/7 rule.

Rating: D-. This is what people are talking about when they say the division was a mess at this point. They would do this same idea for months but it gave people laughable numbers of title reigns with three people having the title over twenty times each. This didn’t have time to go anywhere and wasn’t going to be good anyway.

Crash chases Spike off.

Drowning Pool plays a song called Tear Away which “tells the story” of Jericho vs. HHH. In other words it’s a music video on the Titantron set to the song. Again: time that could have gone to something else. Well not the Hardcore Title match. Anything but that.

Crash and Spike fight in the back when Al Snow speeds in on a golf cart with his own referee, only to crash through cardboard boxes. The Hurricane (a superhero) swings in on a rope and pins Spike to win the title.

JR and Lawler talk about what just happened and then show it again. IT WAS THIRTY SECONDS AGO!

Kurt Angle vs. Kane

Angle has his black singlet on this year and goes on a rant about how much he hates Canada for whining until they won an Olympic medal (reference to a controversy over figure skating) in his usual funny stuff. There isn’t much of a story here but Angle caused Kane some head trauma and Kane wants revenge.

Kane does the fire from the posts but Angle decks him in the head with the bell, which the referee doesn’t see as a DQ because of reasons. Kurt drops him with a German suplex but Kane comes back with your standard choking. A belly to belly sends Kane flying again though and Kurt is right back on him.

Some Olympic style choking has Kane in trouble and it’s a belly to back suplex for two. JR calls Angle the high potentate of the suplexes. You would be better with alliteration Jim. Three rolling Germans get two on Kane so Angle goes aerial, only to get clotheslined out of the air. A tilt-a-whirl powerslam gets two on Kurt but the chokeslam puts him into the ropes.

Kurt shows his intelligence (one of the three I’s, along with intensity and integrity) by going for the mask, setting up the Angle Slam for two. That means it’s ankle lock time but Kane kicks him away and goes up, only to have Kurt run the buckles and superplex Kane back down. Kane comes right back with a chokeslam attempt but Angle rolls through into a cradle with his feet on the ropes and Kane’s shoulder WAY off the mat for the pin at 10:43.

Rating: C. Well that happened. This was a match that was just kind of there and didn’t go anywhere for the most part. The head trauma was forgotten a few minutes into the match, which just left them having a decent wrestling match. That’s fine in theory but it’s not the most interesting thing in the world when there’s no story.

Hurricane hides in a women’s locker room as the girls talk about their implants. Godfather chases him off after some unfunny jokes involving a rising broomstick.

We recap Undertaker (evil again and with short hair) vs. Ric Flair (co-owner of the company due to the fallout of the Invasion). Flair attacked Undertaker to prevent him from cheating at No Way Out so Undertaker wanted a match at Wrestlemania. Ric didn’t want to do it so Undertaker attacked Ric’s friend Arn Anderson and Ric’s son David to get the match made. Flair’s authority was stripped through Wrestlemania so Vince made the match No DQ.

Ric Flair vs. Undertaker

No DQ. Undertaker gets to do another long entrance on the motorcycle. They go straight to the floor with Flair tackling Undertaker over the announcers’ table. Undertaker comes right back by driving Flair into the post as things start getting a lot more violent. Flair’s punches have as little effect as ever so Undertaker throws him into the corner for the Flair Flip and a big boot to put Ric on the floor again. There’s something so entertaining about watching Undertaker punch people in the face, especially when it busts the other guy open like it’s done to Flair here.

The blood starts flowing so Undertaker kicks him in the head but Ric’s chops make Undertaker scream. There’s even blood on the camera lens. A top rope superplex makes the flashbulbs go off but Undertaker (bleeding from the cheek) picks him up at two. Undertaker slowly punches him in the face but Old School is broken up to continue a Wrestlemania tradition.

Some chops put Undertaker on the floor and it’s time for a lead pipe to the big man’s head. That’s not enough to make him sell though so Ric tries the thin metal signs instead. Those work better than a lead pipe for reasons of “wrestling is cooky” and a low blow has Undertaker in even more trouble. The Figure Four goes on but Undertaker remembers that he’s 7′ tall so he does the sit up and grabs Flair by the throat to break the hold.

The referee gets beaten down and now it’s time for Undertaker to have the pipe. Cue Arn Anderson with the spinebuster to save Ric but Undertaker is up at two. Arn gets busted open as well so Ric has to make the save with a chair. That’s fine with Undertaker as he kicks the chair into Ric’s face but for some reason he can’t get the Last Ride. Instead it’s a Tombstone to make Undertaker 10-0 at 18:47.

Rating: B. I liked this better than I remember as you had Flair going into his old school style and making the match last longer than you would normally see here. Undertaker beating him down slowly but surely worked as well with Flair getting his his hope spots where he could. Undertaker had to win here though and that worked very well.

Booker T. is insulted that Edge thinks he isn’t intelligent. He even won an award for his thesis on Einstein’s Theory of Relatives. They’re also fighting over Edge stealing a Japanese shampoo commercial from Booker. That’s one of those stories that you never see again but it was certainly different. I’d love to see more feuds like that. WWE can mix stories up because it creates the universe they live in. Why stick with the same ideas over and over again when you can do almost anything you want?

Edge vs. Booker T.

Edge, the hometown boy here, is on his own as well and rising up the singles ranks. An early dropkick puts Booker down but a hot shot gets him out of trouble. A clothesline puts Edge on the floor (But doesn’t mess up his hair. That shampoo must be working.) and a missile dropkick gets two for Booker. Edge crotches him on top though and scores with a hurricanrana.

It really is interesting to see Edge’s different style before he hurt his neck and became another main event brawler. Take this top rope spinwheel kick for two here. Can you imagine him doing that later in his career? It sounds like a completely different wrestler. Edge’s spear (that sounds more like him) hits the buckle so Booker has time to get in a Wrestlemania Spinarooni. JR: “I tried that last week on my porch.” Now the spear connects for two and Edge does a Spinarooni of his own, followed by the Edgecution (elevated DDT) for the pin at 6:33.

Rating: C-. Standard Raw match here and only on the show because of Edge’s hometown. There was a sign in the crowd that said “THEY’RE FIGHTING OVER SHAMPOO!” I know it sounds goofy but again: would you prefer them fighting over the same old stuff that doesn’t inspire anyone? Nothing match here, but what can you do in less than seven minutes at Wrestlemania?

Mighty Molly (Molly Holly as a superhero) hits Hurricane with a frying pan and steals the title.

We recap Steve Austin vs. Scott Hall. The NWO targeted Austin and cost him his WWF World Title shot at No Way Out so Austin kidnapped Hall and tied him up. The NWO responded by breaking a cinder block over his right knee. For reasons that still aren’t clear, Austin started selling the left knee.

Steve Austin vs. Scott Hall

Austin doesn’t even get to come out first. My goodness that’s quite the fall. Hall brings out the injured (shocking) Kevin Nash but Austin punches away to start. Some rams into the buckle draw the WHAT chants (still going strong nearly fourteen years later). A quick shot to Nash distracts Austin and Hall starts hammering away as Nash takes a buckle pad off. Austin is whipped hard into the exposed steel, followed by a big clothesline for two. Even Nash gets in a shot from the floor as this really would have been better as a handicap match.

Austin grabs a spinebuster to buy himself some time and follows up with a quick Stunner but Nash pulls the referee to the floor. Hall brings in a chair but Austin kicks and Stuns them both. Nash beats up the second referee so Austin backdrops Hall to the floor. A team of referees come out to eject Nash (you don’t mess with a referee posse) as Hall sends Austin into the exposed buckle. Scott gets in a Stunner of his own (more similar to the pre-superstar Austin version) for two but Austin comes back with two more Stunners for the pin at 9:53.

Rating: C-. I wasn’t feeling this one as Austin was clearly missing a major spark. By his own admission he wasn’t in a good place at this point and would walk out on the company for nearly a year just a few months after this. It doesn’t help that Hall vs. Austin really isn’t a very compelling match, though Hall might have set a record for taking the most Stunners in one match.

Axxess video. A girl meets Undertaker and breaks into tears. Even as a heel, you can see that Undertaker is touched.

Tag Team Titles: Billy and Chuck vs. Dudley Boyz vs. Hardy Boyz vs. APA

Elimination rules. Billy and Chuck (Billy Gunn and Chuck Palumbo (a young WCW guy) as a very, shall we say, close team) are defending. Saliva plays the Dudleyz to the ring and their manager Stacy Keibler dances with the band. The APA jumps the champs to start and Bradshaw throws both of them with fall away slams. Chuck finally gets in a clothesline to Faarooq and the champs stomp him down in the corner.

It’s quickly back to Bradshaw and the APA brawls with Billy and Chuck as the other two teams just let them fight. D-Von finally gets tagged in as the fans are really not interested in this one. Bradshaw turns Billy inside out with his clothesline but turns around into 3D to eliminate the APA at 3:25. The Hardys come in and clean house on the champs as the Dudleyz load up a table on the floor.

Jeff drops Bubba with a Whisper in the Wind but Stacy comes up onto the apron and hikes up her shorts for a distraction. All that earns her are a spank and a kiss from Jeff but he walks into a Bubba Bomb. A big backdrop sets up a chinlock on Jeff as the match is already dragging. Off to D-Von for a hard clothesline before Bubba puts Jeff in the Tree of Woe and stands on his crotch (just like Matt got last year). Jeff finally scores with a clothesline and it’s a double tag to Bubba and Matt.

Bubba quickly runs Matt over but misses the middle rope backsplash (JR: “Has he ever hit that move?”). Chuck, who is still in the match despite not doing anything for about eight minutes, shoves D-Von off the top and through the table, leaving Bubba to get caught in a Twist of Fate and Swanton for the elimination at 11:49. The Hardys take over on the champions and it’s the Twist and Swanton to Chuck but Billy hits a quick Fameasser on Jeff to give Chuck two. Not that it matters as Billy comes in with the title belt to knock Jeff out and retain at 13:51.

Rating: D+. WAY too long here and the division continues to die for want of something fresh. We’ve been having the Dudleys vs. the Hardys for years and the next solution was to split up the titles in the fall, which wound up being an even worse idea. Billy and Chuck were fine but this match needed something a lot better than nearly a ten minute Hardys vs. Dudleys match that had been done a hundred times and then two bookend segments.

Hall and Nash say Austin got lucky and plan an attack on Rock tonight. Hogan comes up and calls it off because he needs to do this one himself.

Christian slams a door into Molly’s face for the pin and the title.

We recap Hogan vs. Rock. It was a very simple build: Hogan talked about being a legend but said the fans turned on him. Rock came out and said that Hogan was the one that changed before challenging him to a match at Wrestlemania. Hogan agreed, then hit Rock in the head with a hammer and crushed him with a semi truck. Rock didn’t bother selling the injuries though so it’s really just a battle of the generations.

The Rock vs. Hollywood Hogan

Make no mistake about it: this is the main event. Hogan is here alone and instantly the biggest face on the roster because Toronto is an old WWF town. Rock is nearly booed out of the building for the second year in a row. They stare each other down and you can feel the energy. The bell rings and we get the big lockup with Hogan shoving him down and posing for a standing ovation. Hogan is only the heel in name only here and everyone knows it.

A shoulder puts Rock down and it’s 1987 all over again as Hogan plays to the crowd. Hogan even calls him a meatball as a callback to Rocky III. Now it’s Rock shoving him down and telling Hulk to just bring it. The Rock Bottom doesn’t work and it’s Hogan punching even more. A clothesline sets up an abdominal stretch on the Rock as they’re keeping it very simple so far with big moves to fit the stadium style.

The fans boo Rock out of the building for some chops in the corner so Hogan comes back with a chokeslam of all things. They head outside with Hogan hitting him in the back with a chair. Back in and we’ve got a ref bump which really isn’t needed here. Rock hooks a Sharpshooter and Hogan makes the ropes, only to tap when Rock drags him back to the middle.

A loud ROCKY SUCKS chant breaks out but Hogan turns it into cheers with a low blow and a Rock Bottom of his own. It’s weightlifting belt time but Rock grabs a DDT, allowing him to do some whipping. The Rock Bottom connects…..and he Hulks Up. Hulk kicks out at two and 68,000 people are suddenly five years old again and Hogan is their hero. It’s as if he apologizes for every bad thing he’s done in just a few seconds and the fans accept him with open arms.

The three punches, the big boot and legdrop (JR: “HE BEAT ANDRE THE GIANT WITH THAT MOVE!”) get two so Hogan loads up another leg but it’s Wrestlemania VI all over again. There’s a second Rock Bottom, followed by a third and Rock nips up. The People’s Elbow puts Hogan away at 16:23.

Rating: B. This is ALL about the crowd as the in ring action was ok at best. The fans carry this to an epic encounter though and the ending was the only option they had. Hogan is the biggest name ever but this isn’t WCW and a guy ten years past his prime doesn’t beat the biggest star in the business at the time. That Hulk Up spot is one for the ages and it was done so perfectly that it’s the part of this show people remember more than anything else. Not a great match but an incredible performance and spectacle.

Post match Hogan gets to his feet and stares Rock down again before weakly extending his hand. Rock shakes it and leaves but here are Hall and Nash to beat Hogan down for reasons that aren’t entirely clear. Rock comes back in for the save and it’s posing a go-go. They knew they had something with Hogan here but they had a short time window. He was World Champion in April and lost it a month later, but the idea worked at the time.

Big Show is at WWF New York.

The new attendance record is announced.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Jazz vs. Lita

Jazz is a tough fighter from ECW and defending here. Lawler is in pure lust over Trish in her Maple Leaf (remember she’s from Toronto) shorts. Jazz easily throws them around to start with a double chicken wing and butterfly suplex to Lita. Trish saves Lita from a superplex but kicks her in the head for two. A reverse DDT gets two on Jazz with Lita making the save. Now it’s Lita vs. Trish but Lita has to give Jazz a Twist of Fate. The moonsault hits Trish’s knees and Jazz is sent out to the floor. Stratusfaction is broken up and Jazz grabs the Jazz Stinger (fisherman’s superplex) to pin Lita at 6:16.

Rating: D+. This one didn’t work but they were in the death slot out there. Jazz retaining isn’t the best idea as she had the in ring abilities but no charisma. Trish and Lita were both over but they hadn’t quite become the stars that they would be later on. The good thing here is that the fans were still getting over Rock vs. Hogan and were ready for the main event so the result isn’t the worst thing in the world. Things would get even worse for Lita as she would break her neck a few weeks later and be out nearly a year and a half.

Maven rolls Christian up to get the title back and then steals Christian’s cab to escape. Yeah the whole thing is a big waste of time.

No recap of the main event this year (if only there had been about nine minutes that could have been spent on it instead of two completely worthless musical performances). Jericho won the Undisputed Title by beating the Rock and Steve Austin in the same night (in case you hadn’t heard that before) while HHH was out. HHH returned in January to win the Royal Rumble and earn this spot, but he’s also split up with Stephanie, who has aligned herself with Jericho. In other words, it’s a tacked on way to have her involved here and try to make you think that HHH isn’t winning by a mile.

WWF World Title: HHH vs. Chris Jericho

Drowning Pool plays HHH to the ring with a different song and it really doesn’t work. Jericho still has both belts here as the Undisputed Title would debut soon after this show. HHH has a big bandage on his thigh from the torn muscle. The bell rings and you can already hear Stephanie yelling because she’s very loud and can’t be quiet for ten seconds. HHH starts firing off right hands but makes the mistake of using the flying knee and injures himself.

Chris goes up top instead of staying on the leg but HHH shoves him out to the floor. Back in and Jericho wakes up by finally kicking HHH in the leg. That’s not cool with HHH though as he starts working on Jericho’s leg and even gets a Figure Four until Stephanie rakes the eyes for the break. HHH pulls her to the apron and Jericho accidentally drives a shoulder into Stephanie’s ribs.

The Pedigree to Stephanie is broken up with a missile dropkick and it’s back to the bad leg again. We get the Figure Four around the leg and a lot of yelling at Stephanie. Jericho’s spinning toehold draws a HOGAN chant until HHH kicks him shoulder first into the post. The spinebuster gets two on the champ but he sends HHH hard over the corner and out to the floor on the bad leg. Jericho tries to put on the Walls while HHH is on the table (a move he used after HHH tore his muscle in the first place) but has to settle for a backdrop through the table instead.

The Lionsault gets two back inside and now we hit the Walls. HHH FINALLY makes the rope for the save so it’s time for a chair. Stephanie’s distraction backfires though as HHH DDTs him onto the chair, drawing Stephanie into the ring. We get the big Pedigree but the crowd is spent at this point. Jericho hits him in the back with a chair (uh Chris, notice the BIG BANDAGE ON THE LEG YOU’VE BEEN WORKING ON FOR TEN MINUTES) and then tries a Pedigree like an idiot. HHH shows him how to do it properly and wins the title at 18:41.

Rating: B-. It’s good but anti-climactic. This was eighteen minutes of people working over the leg, which can only go on for so long. The Stephanie stuff was fine but the whole match was just waiting around for the big Pedigree to give HHH the title back. That was the only option they could go with of course and it worked to a degree. The problem is this wasn’t so much of a match as much as it was a countdown to HHH winning the title. It’s an idea that can work, but if you’re just sitting there waiting for something you only kind of want to see, it gets dull in a hurry. Good match, predictable story.

HHH celebrates a lot.

The now traditional four minute highlight package closes us out.

Overall Rating: B-. This show is really just kind of there. Other than Rock vs. Hogan, it’s a VERY forgettable Wrestlemania, at least partially because HHH would only hold the title until Backlash where he dropped it to Hogan. It’s definitely not a bad show but there’s stuff on here that could have been cut (the Hardcore Title, the musical performances, a lot of the Tag Team Title match) to get this down to a much more manageable show. It’s much more forgettable than bad, but sometimes that’s even worse.

Ratings Comparison

Rob Van Dam vs. William Regal

Original: C

2013 Redo: B-

2015 Redo: C

Diamond Dallas Page vs. Christian

Original: D+

2013 Redo: C

2015 Redo: D

Maven vs. Goldust

Original: N/A

2013 Redo: N/A

2015 Redo: D-

Kurt Angle vs. Kane

Original: C+

2013 Redo: C-

2015 Redo: C

Undertaker vs. Ric Flair

Original: B

2013 Redo: C

2015 Redo: B

Edge vs. Booker T

Original: C

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo: C-

Steve Austin vs. Scott Hall

Original: D

2013 Redo: C

2015 Redo: C-

Billy and Chuck vs. APA vs. Dudley Boys vs. Hardy Boys

Original: F

2013 Redo: D

2015 Redo: D+

Rock vs. Hollywood Hogan

Original: C+

2013 Redo: B

2015 Redo: B

Jazz vs. Trish Stratus vs. Lita

Original: F+

2013 Redo: D-

2015 Redo: D+

HHH vs. Chris Jericho

Original: C+

2013 Redo: C+

2015 Redo: B-

Overall Rating

Original: C

2013 Redo: C-

2015 Redo: B-

I went back and forth a lot on that one but it still came out about the same. That’s interesting.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/25/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-18-should-have-been-hogan-vs-austin/

And the 2013 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/03/27/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-xviii-an-actual-dream-match/

Remember to check out my new forum at steelcageforums.com, follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of the WWE Grab Bag (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/03/23/new-paperback-kbs-grab-bag/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Wrestlemania IX
Date: April 4, 1993
Location: Caesars Palace, Las Vegas, Nevada
Attendance: 16,891
Commentators: Jim Ross, Bobby Heenan, Randy Savage

With Wrestlemania XLI in Las Vegas (or really close to it), WWE is looking back at this show in ways that have never been done before. I’m not sure if it’s supposed to be some new appreciation for the show, as it’s not like anyone has ever really appreciated it before. It’s a double main event, though neither match is overly exciting. Let’s get to it.

The opening video focuses on the location more than anything else, with Bret Hart and Yokozuna on the side of a casino.

Host Gorilla Monsoon introduces the newest WWF broadcaster: Jim Ross, who is rather impressed by some of the Roman set. Or he hates it. You never can tell with Ross. Either way, he hypes up the double main event and it still sounds wrong to hear Ross talk about Hulk Hogan.

Finkus Maximus (just go with it) introduces Caesar and Cleopatra, who come in on an elephant. After they do nothing (though the elephant does stand on its hind legs), Randy Savage is brought out on a sedan with some vestal virgins. Then Bobby Heenan, who was supposed to be on the sedan, comes out (backwards) on a camel. Naturally Heenan makes this work, because he can make just about anything work.

Intercontinental Title: Tatanka vs. Shawn Michaels

Michaels, with Luna Vachon, is defending after Tatanka, with Sherri (Shawn’s former manager) beat him a few times in non-title matches. Heenan says Sherri won’t be here in Tatanka’s corner. Savage: “Wrong again camel breath.” They take their time to get going before Michael’s single leg doesn’t exactly work. Tatanka comes back up with a hammerlock but has to power out of a top wristlock.

A headlock takeover out of the corner gives Michaels two so he tries it again, only to get reversed into a belly to back suplex. Michaels goes up but gets armdragged out of the air (cool), setting up a Flair Flip in the corner. Back in and Tatanka starts in on the arm with an armbar as commentary is thankfully right there to tell us about Michaels having a bad shoulder recently.

Michaels fights up but misses a charge into the post, setting up a shoulder breaker but Tatanka drops an elbow instead of covering (Savage is not pleased with the lack of a cover). A top rope chop hits Michaels so Tatanka goes up again, only to dive into the superkick for a sweet counter. They go outside where Michaels hits a hard clothesline off the apron, allowing him to flirt with Sherri for a bit.

Back in and the chinlock goes on, followed by some rapid fire lefts in the corner. For some reason Michaels climbs onto Tatanka’s shoulders and that’s good for an electric chair. Back up and the superkick is blocked, allowing Tatanka to fire off some chops. Even Heenan is getting on Tatanka for not covering so a high crossbody gives Tatanka two.

Michaels gets in a knockdown of his own and goes up but gets powerslammed out of the air for a big crash. They fight to the floor, where Michaels misses a dive off the apron for a nasty crash. That doesn’t work for Michaels, who pulls the referee out to break up the countout, which is a DQ at 18:23.

Rating: B-. This was getting really good by the end as they were just trading big shots. Tatanka was staying a step or two ahead of Michaels the whole way and if Michaels wasn’t such a big deal at this point, changing the title would not have been crazy. That being said, Michaels was clearly the prospect of the future here and protecting him made sense. Good opener here, which doesn’t feel nearly that long.

Post match Tatanka celebrates but Vachon jumps Sherri, leaving Tatanka to chase her off.

The Steiner Brothers are ready to face the Headshrinkers in their first Wrestlemania.

Steiner Brothers vs. Headshrinkers

Afa is here with the Headshrinkers. JR debuts the term “slobberknocker”, which has Heenan right there with the jokes. Scott armdrags Fatu to start and goes after the armbar. Fatu isn’t having that and they slug it out, which is of course fine with Scott. A clothesline turns Fatu inside out so he goes to the eyes to cut Scott off. Rick tries to cut off some double teaming but gets dropped with a single right hand in something you don’t see very often.

The Headshrinkers make the mistake of turning their backs on the Steiners, who go up top (same buckle) and come off with a double Steiner Line (that was awesome). Apparently Luna has attacked Sherri in the First Aid station as it’s off to Rick, who gets chopped down by Samu. Scott comes back in and starts slugging away but gets caught in a hot shot, which goes a bit too hard and he crashes out to the floor.

Afa BLASTS Scott with his stick and they go back inside, where Fatu hits a middle rope headbutt. Something like a bulldog puts Scott down again, as does a standing dropkick from Samu. A Demolition Decapitator (minus the rope walk) gets two but Fatu misses a top rope headbutt. It’s back to Rick, who is taken down with a double Stroke. An electric chair is loaded up but Rick powerslams Fatu out of the air (GEEZ) for two in an awesome looking counter. Scott is back in with a belly to belly but Samu snaps off a great looking superkick. Back up and a quick Frankensteiner gives Scott the pin at 14:27.

Rating: B. The more I watch this match, the more I like it, as you had four big, strong guys just laying it in over and over. They were absolutely beating the fire out of each other and it’s awesome throughout. That powerslam out of the air was great and I wanted to see them stay at it. Heck of a match here and we can call this an underrated gem.

Doink is thrilled with how well his “pranks” have been received, including ripping his ‘own arm out of its socket”, because only Randy Savage got the idea of a cast. Today he’s facing Crush, who might be….seeing double.

Crush vs. Doink The Clown

Doink wastes no time in spraying his flower at Crush to start, earning himself a slam on the floor. Crush posts him hard and they head inside for the first time, where Doink is whipped hard into the corner. Some shots from Doink just make Crush madder and they head back inside for a jumping necksnap over the top (Savage says “love it, love it, love it” over seeing one of his old moves).

Something close to a Stunner over the top staggers Crush though and Doink adds a top rope shot to the back. That works so well that Doink adds a middle rope version, plus another top rope shot to finally put Crush down. Another posting has Crush in more trouble but he powerslams Doink out of the air for quite the crash. A running clothesline sends Doink outside and it’s time to crawl underneath the ring.

That’s broken up so Crush teases the Head Vice, but the referee gets bumped. JR: “I’m concerned about the official who is lying there motionless.” Savage: “No he’s just out cold”. The Head Vice goes on and Doink is in trouble…but here is another Doink to hit Crush in the back with the cast. Two cast shots to the head knock Crush silly and we get a double vision deal. The original Doink gets the pin at 8:29.

Rating: C. The match wasn’t exactly great but it did have a clever ending. The original Doink was a rather interesting idea and could have gone a long way before he went on with the stupid comedy stuff. This should have told you that Crush wasn’t likely going anywhere as losing, even via a screwy finish, in this spot isn’t a good sign.

Post match another referee comes out to check under the ring for the other Doink but they can’t find him.

Todd Pettingill talks to some Japanese photographers, who like Yokozuna.

Bob Backlund vs. Razor Ramon

Backlund offers a handshake to start but gets a toothpick thrown in his face instead. Ramon shoves him into the corner without much trouble but Backlund sweeps the leg a few times and bounces back and forth like Brock Lesnar would later do. Ramon goes with the power take over as we hear about Lex Luger knocking out Bret Hart earlier today. Backlund shrugs it off and hits a hiptoss, followed by a missed dropkick. A butterfly suplex drops Ramon and an atomic drop does the same, only for Ramon to small package him for the pin at 3:44.

Rating: C-. This felt way out of place, as Ramon went from challenging for the WWF Title at the Royal Rumble to whatever this was supposed to be. I’m not sure why this was on the card but it’s one of the more bizarre matches you will ever see at Wrestlemania. At least it was short, but egads this did not feel like it belonged on Wrestlemania.

Money Inc. doesn’t seem worried about the Mega Maniacs. We look back at Money Inc. smashing Brutus Beefcake’s face with their briefcase, which got Jimmy Hart on Beefcake’s side. It also brought Hulk Hogan back to the WWF, but Money Inc. still isn’t worried.

Tag Team Titles: Money Inc. vs. Mega Maniacs

The Maniacs, with Jimmy Hart, are challenging and Hogan is sporting a REALLY nasty black eye (apparently from a Jetski accident but also possibly due to a backstage fight with Randy Savage, depending on which story you believe). The villains try to jump the Maniacs before the bell and are cleared out while Hogan’s music is still playing. Money Inc. is chased to the floor again and we finally start with Beefcake and IRS.

Beefcake gets taken into the wrong corner for some chops and DiBiase comes in for an elbow to the (masked) face. For some reason DiBiase goes for a shot to the face and hurts his own hand, setting up a double noggin knocker to bring us back to the 80s. DiBiase’s ram into the buckle has no effect either and Beefcake sends him into the corner over and over for some more success.

Hogan comes in for a few shots but it’s already back to Beefcake for the stomping. Hogan’s middle rope ax handle connects and DiBiase is sent outside. A poke to the eye cuts IRS off and Hogan sends him outside like a hero should be doing. Money Inc. teases leaving but are threatened with losing the titles if they don’t get back in. That means an eight count, sending Heenan into a rant about the rules being made up as they go.

Back in and DiBiase takes over on Hogan, with the champs getting in a variety of choking on the ropes. We hit the Million Dollar Dream and Hogan stays in it so long that he should be legally dead. Savage: “They’re hanging from the rafters! But they don’t have rafters in the Roman Coliseum. What they have are columns and they’re hanging from them!” Hogan fights up so Beefcake comes in (no tag) and puts the sleeper on DiBiase, leaving him out cold as well. They both beat the ten count and Beefcake comes back in to clean house, only for DiBiase to hit him in the back with the briefcase.

DiBiase finally goes after the mask and gets it off, meaning Beefcake’s face is sent into a raised boot in the corner. Beefcake fights up and drops IRS but the referee gets bumped. The double tag (unseen by the referee) brings in Hogan and DiBiase with the former slugging away.

The big boot hits DiBiase and Beefcake hits IRS with the mask. We get a double cover so Jimmy Hart turns his jacket inside out (it has black and white stripes) to count the double pin. Ever the morons, Hogan and Beefcake celebrate with the titles (Hogan slips on the ropes) and even Savage doesn’t think this makes sense. Another referee comes out to disqualify the Maniacs at 18:28.

Rating: D+. I’m not sure what makes good guys in wrestling so dumb but my goodness this was stupid even by wrestlers’ standards. It might have come after being so bored by the match, which was just WAY too long and nothing worth seeing. Hogan being in a tag team doesn’t feel important in the slightest and Beefcake felt like a relic of the past here. Just dull stuff here and a pretty lame flop of a match.

Post match the Maniacs are annoyed at the other referee for calling the DQ and Hart throws him over the top. Hogan gets to pose while Beefcake and Hart stand around, leaving him to open the briefcase and find….a brick. And money. One of which is given to the fans. Well gee I wonder why they’re cheering Hogan here.

Singer Natalie Cole has absolutely nothing to say but the CEO of Caesars Palace is a bit happier to have the WWF here.

Mr. Perfect isn’t worried about Lex Luger and his bionic forearm. Luger calls himself a knockout artist and beyond perfection but Perfect has been hot at the tables this week. He’s ready to go deal with….the Lexissus? Perfect almost cracks up at his flub and says he’s going to go do it.

Lex Luger vs. Mr. Perfect

Luger has some rather scantily clad women with him and Savage seems interested. JR: “I’ve been to at least a dozen rodeos in Oklahoma and I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything like that.” Heenan: “OF COURSE NOT!” The women hold up the mirrors and we’re officially ready to go. They take their time to start until Perfect hits a nice running knee lift. A shoulder puts Luger down and a running dropkick does it again, meaning it’s time for a breather on the floor.

Back in and Luger slowly hammers away but Perfect takes him down and gets in the Robinsdale Crunch. The leg gets cranked on for a bit but Luger gets up and sends him into the buckle a few times to take over. A backbreaker keeps Perfect down and a cradle with feet on the ropes gets two.

Luger hits a powerslam for two but Perfect’s sunset flip gets the same. Perfect catapults him head first into the buckle and slowly hammers away for two. A not so perfect missile dropkick gives Perfect two and they fight over a backslide, with Perfect’s feet touching the ropes, though the referee doesn’t see it, to give Luger the cheap pin at 10:57.

Rating: C-. Not much to see here, with Perfect being his usual athletic self but Luger was basically in slow motion. The Narcissist stuff never worked and that was on full display again. Perfect was doing his thing and I still really like him as a good guy, but there is only so much you can do with this kind of a situation.

Post match Perfect is furious and Luger knocks him out with the big forearm. This was possibly the long form setup for Perfect screwing Luger over the next year, which is a heck of a story if that is where they were going. Luger leaves so Perfect goes after him, shoving away Shawn Michaels in the process. Michaels jumps Perfect from behind and beats him down, setting up their Summerslam feud.

Heenan laughs about what happened to Perfect, which has Savage on his feet in anger for some reason.

Gorilla Monsoon hypes up the two remaining matches.

Giant Gonzalez vs. Undertaker

Harvey Wippleman and Paul Bearer are here too. If that’s not enough, Undertaker comes to the ring in a funeral chariot with a vulture, because he’s that kind of awesome. They do the big staredown and Undertaker barely comes up to Gonzalez’s nose. Gonzalez shoves him down and chokes away, with Undertaker having to go to the middle rope to choke back. A low blow cuts Undertaker off but he’s right back with Old School.

Gonzalez gets in a beal to send him flying and we hit a standing chinlock. Undertaker finally fights up but gets sent outside so Gonzalez can slowly hammer away. The steps crush Undertaker again but he gets back inside, where a headbutt puts him down again. Undertaker strikes away and goes after Wippleman, who throws in a rag. Gonzalez uses said rag, which is apparently covered in ether, to knock Undertaker out for the DQ at 7:36.

Rating: D-. Oh yeah this was every bit as bad as you could imagine. At the end of the day, Gonzalez could not do anything in the ring to back up his presence. It’s amazing to see someone that size, but it only gets you so far when you can’t do ANYTHING once the bell rings. Throw in a stupid ending to protect Gonzalez and this was an all time terrible Wrestlemania match.

Post match Undertaker is taken out on a stretcher, with Savage implying that undertaker is dead (which….yeah kind of the point). Undertaker leaves so the fans chant for Hogan, which draws Undertaker back out to clear the ring. Cops come out to take Gonzalez away.

We recap Bret Hart defending the WWF Title against Yokozuna, which is all about Yokozuna being a total monster. Yokozuna has crushed a bunch of people with the Banzai Drop, including Hart, who did get up, though that’s not shown here due to reasons. Naturally this means we talk to Hulk Hogan, who has been firing Hart up. You really should be able to see it coming from here. Last night, some people attacked him at the gym but that’s not what matters right now. Hart is a Hulkamaniac but Hogan wants the first shot at either Hart or the (deleted Japanese slur). And that’s that.

Todd Pettingill meets some annoying fans.

WWF Title: Yokozuna vs. Bret Hart

Yokozuna, with Mr. Fuji, is challenging. They stare each other down to start until Hart hits a running dropkick. Some right hands in the corner don’t have much impact and Yokozuna runs him over to the floor without much trouble. Hart gets smart by tripping him down and getting the big leg tied in the ropes. Some right hands and a middle rope elbow have Yokozuna in more trouble but he’s able to get out.

One heck of a clothesline puts Hart down, setting up the big legdrop as the pace slows. A nerve hold has Hart down again but he fights up and gets a boot up in the corner. The middle rope bulldog puts Yokozuna down for two but he’s right back with a superkick. The nerve hold goes on again but Hart avoids a splash. The Sharpshooter actually goes on (and it’s not a bad one either), only for Fuji to throw salt in his eyes. Yokozuna gets the pin and the title at 8:57.

Rating: D+. This is a similar story to the Gonzalez match, but Yokozuna is FAR better than Gonzalez could ever hope to be. That being said, Hart was still limited in what he could do, but some of the ways he was outsmarting Yokozuna did work. It’s far from a terrible match, though it’s certainly not worth a look outside of the title change.

Post match Hulk Hogan is IMMEDIATELY out there to check on Hart, prompting Fuji to issue the challenge for a title shot RIGHT NOW in an all time dumb move. Hart gives Hogan his blessing and yes we’re on.

WWF Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Yokozuna

Hogan is challenging and gets jumped at the start, so Fuji throws more salt, only to hit Yokozuna. The freedom loving referee is fine with this, allowing Hogan to hit a clothesline and drop the leg to win the title at 22 seconds.

Hogan celebrates to end the show as Heenan is losing his mind.

Overall Rating: D+. Yeah this show deserves a lot of its reputation. There are all kinds of issues here, and one that doesn’t get addressed enough is the Roman Coliseum deal. It feels like some goofy fun idea and that doesn’t mesh with the biggest show of the year. Do this for something like Summerslam, but don’t try to make Wrestlemania into a themed show.

That’s on top of ALL the other problems, including some pretty dreadful matches and almost nothing that feels Wrestlemania worthy. Hogan coming in to steal the title and make Hart the afterthought of afterthoughts didn’t help either. This show somehow lives down to its terrible reputation and even the awesomeness that is the Steiners vs. the Headshrinkers (easily the match of the night) can’t bring it up to even ok.

Ratings Comparison

Tatanka vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: B+
2013 Redo: B
2015 Redo: B
2025 Redo: B-

Steiner Brothers vs. Headshrinkers

Original: B+
2013 Redo: B
2015 Redo: A-
2025 Redo: B

Doink the Clown vs. Crush

Original: D
2013 Redo: D+
2015 Redo: D
2025 Redo: C

Razor Ramon vs. Bob Backlund

Original: C-
2013 Redo: D
2015 Redo: D
2025 Redo: C-

Money Inc. vs. Mega Maniacs

Original: C+
2013 Redo: D+
2015 Redo: D
2025 Redo: D+

Lex Luger vs. Mr. Perfect

Original: C-
2013 Redo: C
2015 Redo: D+
2025 Redo: C-

Undertaker vs. Giant Gonzalez

Original: F+
2013 Redo: D-
2015 Redo: F
2025 Redo: D-

Yokozuna vs. Bret Hart

Original: D+
2013 Redo: D+
2015 Redo: D+
2025 Redo: D+

Yokozuna vs. Hulk Hogan

Original: N/A
2013 Redo: N/A
2015 Redo: N/A
2025 Redo: N/A

Overall Rating

Original: F+
2013 Redo: D
2015 Redo: D
2025 Redo: D+

It’s interesting that Hart vs. Yokozuna has been the same for all four versions but the show just is not very good.

 

 

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