Survivor Series Count-Up – 1991 (2012 Redo): It Still Annoys Me

Survivor Series 1991
Date: November 27, 1991
Location: Joe Louis Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Attendance: 17,500
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

Gorilla and Bobby talk for a bit.

Team Ric Flair vs. Team Roddy Piper

Ric Flair, Ted DiBiase, The Mountie, The Warlord

Roddy Piper, Bret Hart, Davey Boy Smith, Virgil

Sherri is sent to the back and Roddy brings in Smith. The good guys work over the arm of DiBiase with Virgil of all people getting the biggest pop. After all four go in they start going around again with all four getting in another set of shots on the arm. Bret stays in but misses a knee in the corner to put himself in trouble. They trade near falls before Bret takes him right back down by the arm.

Virgil gets sent to the floor and Flair sends him into the steps, with Virgil doing an awful job of pretending to slam into them. The full nelson goes on but everything breaks down and Bret comes off the top to take out Warlord, giving the illegal Piper the pin to tie us up at 3. Piper vs. DiBiase now before Virgil is quickly tagged in. Virgil slaps the Million Dollar Dream on DiBiase but Ted sends him into the buckle to escape.

Rating: B. Gah this was going AWESOME until the pretty lame ending. Having Flair be the sole survivor is a smart move though as it makes the fans hate him even more. This was a GREAT setup though and was on pace to be a classic before the ending. To be fair though, at the pace they were going the match would have been an hour long if they were going to do a full version. Still though, what we got was very good.

Gorilla thinks Tuesday in Texas may be on TV! Give me a break.

Team Mustafa vs. Team Slaughter

Colonel Mustafa, Berzerker, Skinner, Hercules

Sgt. Slaughter, Tito Santana, Jim Duggan, Texas Tornado

Rating: F. The match sucked, it was never in doubt, and the biggest deal on the heel team was Skinner, who would get an IC Title shot soon after this. What a horrible match and one of the most worthless ones in the history of the show so far, which is covering quite a bit of ground. Nothing to see here at all.

WWF World Title: Undertaker vs. Hulk Hogan

Rating: D. Yeah this match completely sucked but we have a new champion and a reason to watch Flair vs. Hogan, which never happened for various reason. Hogan would beat Taker for the title at Tuesday in Texas six days later, but the title would be held up and decided in the Rumble, where Flair would win it and set up Wrestlemania. Bad match, but a BIG moment.

People come out to check on Hogan as Gorilla rips into Flair. Hogan takes awhile to leave, likely to let the fans get over some of their shock.

Roddy is in the back and goes on a big rant against Tunney and Flair and Taker.

Intermission, which means we see a graphic for fifteen minutes.

Team Nasty Boys vs. Team Rockers

Nasty Boys, Beverly Brothers

Rockers, Bushwhackers

Gorilla and Bobby plug Tuesday in Texas again.

Legion of Doom/Big Boss Man vs. IRS/Natural Disasters

Quake wants to fight IRS now but walks off with Typhoon instead, making it the LOD vs. IRS. Hawk powerslams IRS down but a charge goes shoulder first into the post. Hawk gets sent face first into the steps as we continue to fill time by having IRS look like he has a chance. We hit the chinlock as the announcers talk about Thanksgiving dinner. Not hot tag brings in Animal who cleans whatever is left in the house. IRS tries to walk out but runs into Boss Man in the aisle. Hawk hits a top rope clothesline for the win.

Gene is in the bowels of the building with Bearer and Taker. Hogan will rest in peace. In Texas. They look in a casket to end the show.

Ratings Comparison

Team Flair vs. Team Piper

Original: A-

Redo: B

Team Slaughter vs. Team Mustafa

Original: F

Redo: F

Undertaker vs. Hulk Hogan

Original: C-

Redo: D

Team Nasty Boys vs. Team Rockers

Original: D

Redo: D

Legion of Doom/Big Boss Man vs. IRS/Natural Disasters

Original: D

Redo: D+

Overall Rating:

Original: D+

Redo: D-

A little worse this time, but the same problems still plague this show. Screw you Vince.




Survivor Series Count-Up – 1990 (2012 Redo): They Need A New Idea

Survivor Series 1990
Date: November 22, 1990
Location: Hartford Civic Center, Hartford, Connecticut
Attendance: 16,000
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Roddy Piper

This is a somewhat different show that in recent years as we have a main event of sorts. It was never tried again and that’s probably the best idea. It’s called the Grand Finale Match of Survival in which the survivors of each team meet in one final Survivor Series match. The winners get absolutely nothing, which continues to prove that these shows are pretty worthless. Let’s get to it.

Sean Mooney welcomes us to the show and talks about the Grand Finale. He’s standing in front of a giant egg which apparently is going to hatch because of the heat from the crowd. Nothing good can possibly come from this.

The nifty squares open things up again.

After Gorilla and Piper chat a bit, we’re ready to go.

The Warriors vs. The Perfect Team

Ultimate Warrior, Texas Tornado, Legion of Doom
Mr. Perfect, Demolition

I guess this team isn’t as Ultimate as last year. This is the three man version of Demolition. Perfect is feuding with Tornado (Kerry Von Erich, the IC Champion) and the LOD is feuding with Demolition after the LOD cost them the titles. Warrior, the world champion, is there because he has nothing else to do. His team is in the back before the match and says they’ll win. Actually the name Warriors is appropriate as you have the Ultimate Warrior, the Modern Day Warrior (Von Erich’s nickname in WCCW) and the Road Warriors (the LOD’s NWA name).

I’ll never get why the LOD and Demolition never had a big proper match. They fought on house shows but that’s about it. Perfect immediately goes to the apron and lets part of Demolition start. It’s Animal vs. Smash first and they fight immediately with Animal taking him to the mat. Animal throws him into Hawk for a right hand and the other Warriors get in a shot as well.

Smash comes back with a powerslam for two and it’s off to Perfect. That doesn’t last long so here’s Smash again, and he walks right into a powerslam. Everything breaks down and the Warriors clear the ring. Tornado comes in to face Smash who is taking a beating in this so far. Off to Ax who has much better luck for about ten seconds. There’s the Claw from Tornado but for some reason Warrior gets the tag and hits a series of awkward looking shoulder blocks before finishing Ax with the splash.

Crush immediately comes in to jump Warrior and take over. Smash comes in to slam Warrior and Crush drops a top rope knee for two. Perfect is freaking out in his trademark over the top style. Warrior gets up a boot in the corner and clotheslines Crush down. Off to Hawk who always looks like he could murder someone in the ring. Perfect tries him out and is immediately slammed down.

Hawk counters a reversal to send Perfect into the corner but Bird Man’s shoulder goes into the post HARD to give the evil ones the advantage. Demolition pounds away on him but Hawk punches right back. A big flying shoulder puts Smash down and Hawk doesn’t tag when he has the chance. The top rope clothesline kills Smash and everything breaks down. Hawk kicks the referee and somehow this disqualifies Hawk, Animal, Smash and Crush. We’re down to Perfect vs. Warrior/Tornado.

It’s going to be Warrior starting the handicap match but Perfect wants Tornado instead. Perfect immediately jumps him and is clotheslined out almost immediately after the jumping. Warrior bangs Perfect’s head into Heenan’s and sends Bobby into the front row. Tornado charges at Perfect and slams into the post to give Perfect the advantage for a bit. A buckle gets exposed somewhere in there and after Tornado’s face goes into it, the Perfectplex makes it one on one.

Perfect tries the Plex again on Warrior which doesn’t work at all. Instead he hammers Warrior down and hits a great looking dropkick for two. Having Perfect run things out there for as long as possible is the best idea they’ve got. Warrior starts grabbing the ropes and shrugging off all the offense from Perfect. A shoulder block and the splash get the final pin.

Rating: D. This was probably the worst Survivor Series match so far in the four years they’ve been running this show. Not only was the match lopsided from the start, but half of the people in it were gone seven minutes in. Perfect never had a chance and Warrior had no reason to be in this match at all.

Ted DiBiase has a mystery partner for his match. Oh boy did he ever.

Million Dollar Team vs. Dream Team

Ted DiBiase, Rhythm and Blues, ???
Dusty Rhodes, Koko B. Ware, Hart Foundation

Rhythm and Blues are Honky Tonk Man and Greg Valentine and the Harts are the tag champions. Dusty and DiBiase are feuding for obvious character reasons. Now we get to the legendary part of the match: the mystery partner. DiBiase gets on the mic and introduces for the first time ever…..THE UNDERTAKER. Who on the planet would have imagined what this guy would become over the next twenty two years? Unreal indeed. The look on Taker’s face is eerie and he stands there like a zombie which makes it even better.

Quick sidebar: the Undertaker is probably the greatest example ever of someone being the only person that could pull off his character. Mark Calaway is PERFECT as the Undertaker with the look and the size and the dead looking eyes and the tattoos and everything like that. Before this he was just Mean Mark Callous in WCW and was a generic big villain. Sometimes it’s about finding what works and Taker has worked for a very long time. Also a bit of trivia: he debuted at a Superstars taping three days before this under the name Kane the Undertaker.

Undertaker and Bret start with Taker pounding the tar out of him. Well if you want to make someone look like a killer, call Bret Hart. Bret hits the ropes and charges at Taker, only to get caught by the throat and slammed down. It was more like a clothesline that Taker went to the mat with than the usual chokeslam here but he did have Bret by the throat.

Off to Neidhart who can’t move Taker at all and gets slammed for trying. Jim looked TERRIFIED and tags out to Koko, who is too stupid to be afraid. Koko misses a charge and clotheslines himself on the top. The Tombstone (I believed named by Gorilla on the spot here) debuts but isn’t exactly the famous version yet, as Taker has both of Koko’s legs on one side of his head and covers with the folded arms but from the sides. It looked and sounded great though.

Bret comes in and hammers on Undertaker who just stares at him. Taker tags in Valentine and gives one of the most evil glares you’ll ever see at Bret. Off to Big Dust who starts gyrating. They chop it out in the corner and it’s off to Anvil. The Harts take their turns working over Valentine’s arm but Greg gets a knee up in the corner. Off to Honky who is rapidly on his way out of the company. Bret makes a blind tag to Neidhart who sneaks in and powerslams Honky out.

DiBiase comes in to jump Neidhart but it’s quickly off to Dusty for the big showdown. It’s back to Neidhart quickly but Virgil trips Jim up and DiBiase clotheslines him down for the pin. Here’s Bret again who pounds away and it’s back to Dream for more of the same. Back to Undertaker who gets some HEIGHT on a jumping stomp to the back of Dusty’s head.

Bret comes in again and chokes Bret in the corner and somehow shows no emotion while at the same time looking angrier than any wrestler I’ve ever seen. Bret fights off DiBiase out of the corner and it’s off to Dusty. Taker comes in, goes up, walks (a little way) down the rope with no one to hold onto, and hits a double ax to eliminate Dusty. Brother Love stomps on Dusty a bit so Dusty chases him off. Undertaker stalks Dusty to the back to get counted out, which is the only thing they could have done with him here.

Back in the ring Bret rolls up Valentine very quickly and it’s DiBiase vs. Hart. Bret pounds on DiBiase and atomic drops him to the floor, followed by a pescado to take Ted out again. DiBiase’s shoulder goes into the post and his head goes into the steps and they head back inside. They slug it out but DiBiase sends him chest first into the buckle to take over.

A quick backslide gets two for Hart and now it’s time for a classic: Bret trips over DiBiase and fakes a knee injury, resulting in a small package for two. Virgil interference messes up and another rollup gets two for Bret. The backbreaker and middle rope elbow get two for Hart but DiBiase rolls through a cross body for the pin.

Rating: C+. This is a very interesting match as you could see stars being made and stars going away. DiBiase clearly didn’t mean as much as he used to and would shift into a tag team run soon after this. Dusty would be gone in January as would Honky. On the other hand you can see the rise of Bret Hart on the horizon as the crowd was LOSING IT over those near falls at the end. Oh and the Undertaker. That’s kind of a big deal.

The Vipers are ready for Martel’s team. Why they’re in the shower I’m not sure.

The Vipers vs. The Visionaries

Jake Roberts, Rockers, Jimmy Snuka
Rick Martel, Warlord, Power and Glory

Power and Glroy are Hercules and Paul Roma. This is built around Martel vs. Roberts, which is based on Martel blinding Jake with cologne and Jake not having full vision yet. This was a BIG feud which they screwed up with a horrible match at Wrestlemania. It wasn’t that the wrestling was bad, but that it was a blindfold match and they spent about 2 minutes in contact with each other.

Marty and Warlord start as Piper is singing I Am The Walrus. Warlord powers Marty around but misses a charge in the corner. For those of you unfamiliar with Warlord, imagine Chris Masters but paler, bald, and even dumber. Both Rockers try to outmaneuver him but it just results in bringing in Martel. Shawn handles him with ease and brings in Jake, causing Martel to scamper away.

It’s Roma instead and Jake picks him apart like he’s not even there. He works on Roma’s arm and brings in Snuka to keep it up, but the afro apparently weighs down Snuka’s brain to the point where he can’t maintain a wristlock. Off to Hercules who gets chopped down so it’s off to Warlord instead. Snuka tries his stuff but when that gets nowhere it’s off to Marty. Jannetty tries his speed stuff but jumps into a great looking powerslam for the pin.

Off to Shawn whose leapfrog is caught but he ranas Warlord down instead. Jake comes in and the fans wants a DDT. A bunch of clotheslines take Warlord down and it’s back to Shawn. Roma comes in with an elbow drop to the back of the head as Gorilla talks anatomy. Warlord comes in and backdrops Shawn before tagging out to Herc. Martel comes in just as fast and drops a knee for two. Roma sends Shawn into the corner and Shawn of course sells it like he’s dead. Martel’s shoulder hits the post and here’s Snuka again.

A flying headbutt to the standing Martel gets two, but Rick grabs a small package for the pin out of nowhere. Jake comes in again and Martel immediately runs and brings in Hercules. Roberts is getting frustrated because he can’t get his hands on Martel, but he still manages a knee lift and a failed DDT attempt. Jake starts pounding away on Herc and Martel clotheslines him down out of nowhere.

Roma comes in for some stomping but he misses a middle rope punch. There’s the hot tag to Shawn who suplexes Roma down and hits a middle rope elbow for two. Shawn does what he can but Hercules comes in off a blind tag and pounds away even more. Power and Glory hook up the Powerplex (superplex from Herc immediately followed by a top rope splash from Roma) eliminates Shawn and it’s 4-1. It’s Hercules in first but Jake is in trouble. Warlord comes in with a bearhug but Jake escapes and DDTs him out of nowhere. Jake says screw it and gets the snake out. He chases Martel to the back for the countout loss.

Rating: D+. There wasn’t much to see here but other than Jake vs. Martel, there was nothing here at all. To the best of my knowledge, Warlord and Snuka never interacted at all before or after this so they were just tacked on. The Rockers and Power and Glory had fought at Summerslam but that’s about it. The Visionaries are the first ever team to survive intact.

The Hulkamaniacs are ready for the Natural Disasters. This is a continuation of Hogan vs. Earthquake, with Hulk N Pals facing Earthquake and Jimmy Hart’s and Bobby Heenan’s cronies. Hogan says they can go get rid of Sadaam Hussein. This is during the Gulf War.

Natural Disasters vs. Hulkamaniacs

Earthquake, Dino Bravo, Haku, Barbarian
Hulk Hogan, Big Bossman, Tugboat, Jim Duggan

There’s some actual drama here as Hogan had never beaten Earthquake before this and the other guys balance out somewhat well. Haku vs. Duggan start us off as the announcers talk about the Grand Finale. It’s such a different time when they automatically know who is going to be on what side. Today you would be waiting on the swerve. Duggan pounds away on Haku and a clothesline gets two.

Bravo and Barbarian come in to get some shots but it’s quickly off to Boss Man vs. Haku. Haku dropkicks him down for two but the Boss Man Slam puts Haku out quick. Barbarian comes in next and Boss Man runs him over. Heenan gets taken off the apron and Boss Man punches Barbarian a bit before walking into a suplex. Barbie misses a middle rope elbow and it’s off to Duggan vs. Bravo. Scratch that as Earthquake makes a blind tag and crushes Duggan in the corner. Duggan keeps trying to knock Quake down but Jimmy low bridges him. Duggan brings the board in with him and hits Quake for the DQ.

It’s Hogan vs. Earthquake but Hulk beats up all three guys because he can. Hogan easily slams Earthquake and fires off ten punches in the corner. Quake comes back with a powerslam and tags in Bravo who stomps away before getting small packaged for the pin. There’s the tag to Boss Man who hits his rapid fire punches in the corner. Boss Man goes up for a cross body and oh my goodness Earthquake caught him. That is SCARY. Hogan shoves Boss Man on top of him for two but Barbarian kicks Boss Man in the back to put him down. An elbow from Earthquake eliminates Boss Man.

Hogan vs. Quake again and Hulk tries to drop the big guy. Hulk tries another slam but can’t get Quake up. The third attempt results in Quake falling on Hogan for two. Hulk avoids an elbow and there’s the tag to Tugboat, causing everyone to shout TOOOOT which sounds like booing. Hogan pulls Earthquake to the floor and Quake and Tugboat get counted out. That leaves Hogan vs. Barbarian and the only thing I can think to say is “really?” Barbarian goes after Hogan on the floor and doesn’t hit a piledriver well at all. It gets two and they clothesline each other. Barbarian hits the top rope clothesline, Hulk Up, legdrop, done.

Rating: C-. This was a lot more fast paced and energetic than you would expect. The continued practice of just teasing the encounter that the match is based on is getting REALLY old though as I guess they want to preserve the house show draws, because who would want to see a feud continue after a single match right? My goodness have things changed in the last twenty years.

Hogan beats up Heenan post match and poses. Piper cheering for Hogan is just wrong.

Some fans talk and get on my nerves. Well one fan signs who he likes which is cool.

Here’s Savage with something to say. He’s still the King at this point which has been going on for awhile. Savage doesn’t have a match tonight and he doesn’t like not being recognized as the future WWF Champion. He promises to take his title back from Warrior and talks about Sherri slapping The Ultimate Chicken a few times. There’s nothing of note here but it reinforced that they have issues. That’s something you never hear today: promos to just remind you that people don’t like each other.

Alliance vs. Mercenaries

Nikolai Volkoff, Bushwhackers, Tito Santana
Sgt. Slaughter, Boris Zhukov, Orient Express

This is during the Iraqi Sympathizer period for Slaughter and the idea here is military themed. Before the match, Slaughter tells Gene about having a Thanksgiving dinner with the Mercenaries and not having to be inconvenienced by being in the desert. That’s better than being in the Army and eating K-Rations right? This was a pretty edgy angle at the time. Stupid but edgy. This interview is in the arena with the Mercenaries’ music playing. That must be a pretty dull period for the crowd.

The Bushwhackers torment Boris to start and the flying forearm from Tito eliminates him in about 20 seconds. Sato comes in and is accidentally superkicked by Tanaka. The Battering Ram puts out Sato and it’s 4-2 inside of two minutes. Tanaka comes in and the forearm from Tito makes it 4-1 in less than 2:15. Volkoff pounds on Slaughter with his usual stuff but gets punched in the face for his efforts as Slaughter takes over.

After a long beating, Slaughter eliminates Volkoff with an elbow. There were about three minutes of beating in between there but there was absolutely nothing of note to talk about. The Bushwhackers double team Sarge for a bit but Slaughter beats them down and gutbusts Luke for an elimination. A clothesline takes out Butch about 30 seconds later and it’s one on one.

Tito immediately dropkicks Slaughter into the post and things speed up with by far the two most talented guys in the match in there. Tito hits a top rope forearm for two and stomps away even faster. Piper is trying not to curse and Slaughter slams Santana’s head into the mat. A neckbreaker and backbreaker combine for two on Santana.

After some more beating, Tito gets a quick forearm attempt but hits the referee by mistake. The forearm hits the second time but General Adnan (Slaughter’s manager/boss) hits Santana with the flag and Slaughter puts on the Camel Clutch. The referee saw the flag though and it’s a DQ win for Tito.

Rating: D-. Well that…..happened I guess. They went through seven eliminations inside of eleven minutes and the match was awful. Basically this could have been Slaughter vs. either Volkoff or Santana and gotten the same payoff. I have no idea what they were going for here, but my guess is that they had nothing else to fill in fifteen minutes with (the show only runs two hours and twenty minutes and we’ve got the ultimate dumb filler to go).

DiBiase and the Visionaries say Warrior and Hogan (no mention of Santana) can’t work together. Sean says it’s going to be these five against Warrior and Santana.

It’s time for the Egg Hatching. Gene talks about the fans being hot tonight and the egg starts to hatch. There’s no way around this: it’s the Gobbledygooker, a humanoid turkey who square dances to Turkey in the Straw with Gene Okerlund, does a bunch of flips and is played by the WAY too talented for this Hector Guerrero.

The fans IMMEDIATELY start booing when it hatches, as there is absolutely no point to it. This was rumored to be anything from Undertaker to Flair (about a year early for him) to some Playboy chick. When you’re in a bad mood about being unemployed, remember that someone came up with this idea and was paid to do so. Total time spent on this: over seven minutes.

Hogan, Warrior and Santana are ready.

Hulk Hogan/Tito Santana/Ultimate Warrior vs. Ted DiBiase/Visionaries

If you can’t see the ending of this coming, just go click on something else now. Oddly enough, Hogan comes out before Tito. Tito and Warlord start and a forearm ends Warlord in less than 30 seconds. To update a reference for 2012, Tito is apparently the Ronda Rousey of the WWF. Roma immediately powerslams Tito and brings in DiBiase. My goodness a 20 minute Santana vs. DiBiase match would freaking rock. Tito misses another forearm and a hot shot gets the pin for DiBiase.

Hogan comes in and beats the tar out of DiBiase for a bit before ducking his head too early. A kick to Hogan’s face slows him down and it’s off to Hercules and almost immediately Roma for a top rope forearm for two. Back to Hercules who pounds away on Hulk even more, as does DiBiase. The Powerplex hits Hogan and has basically no effect. Roma is immediately pinned by a clothesline and it’s 3-2.

Martel comes in to beat on Hogan but gets kicked in the face. Off to Warrior who fires off a bunch of kicks in the corner and backdrops Martel. Rick tries to hit him in the head and boy are you really that dumb? Hogan knocks Martel to the floor and Rick walks off for the countout. Hogan beats on DiBiase a bit and there’s the legdrop. Warrior beats Hercules with the splash about 40 seconds later to win.

Rating: D. What in the world was the point of this? I mean……am I watching a house show? These are the kind of matches you hear about at the end of shows to send the fans home happy, not to main event a PPV. It was clear that this show wasn’t needed and that something had to be done.

Posing ends the show.

Overall Rating: F. This show has some moments of ok, but can you imagine PAYING for this show? Undertaker debuts here but no one had any idea what that would mean. Nothing is changed at all, mainly because the company was afraid no one would want to see the house show matches after this. This show runs two hours and eighteen minutes and eight minutes of that are the Gobbledygooker. On top of that the main event runs about ten minutes in total counting entrances. You’re looking at about two hours for the non main event stuff and that’s ridiculous for a PPV. This is another show that doesn’t need to exist.

Ratings Comparison

Warriors vs. Perfect Team

Original: C-
Redo: D

Dream Team vs. Million Dollar Team

Original: C+
Redo: C+

Vipers vs. Visionaries

Original: D+
Redo: D+

Hulkamaniacs vs. Natural Disasters

Original: C+
Redo: C-

Alliance vs. Mercenaries

Original: F
Redo: D-

Grand Finale Match of Survival

Original: D-
Redo: D

Overall Rating

Original: F
Redo: F

It sucked four years ago and it still sucks now.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

Survivor Series Count-Up – 1990 (Original): A Turkey And An Undertaker Walk Into A Show…

 

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Survivor Series Count-Up – 1989 (2018 Redo): The Greatest Team Of All Time

Survivor Series 1989
Date: November 23, 1989
Location: Rosemont Horizon, Rosemont, Illinois
Attendance: 15,294
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Jesse Ventura

This was one of two options for me to redo this year and since I did the 1996 show just two years ago and this is my favorite era, it wasn’t all that hard of a choice. It’s actually an interesting show as there are a few experiments taking place which could make for something fun to watch. Let’s get to it.

We open with the Saturday Night’s Main Event style promos from people on the show. This is already off to a cool start.

Hulk Hogan is happy that he’s healthy, but also for his team of Hulkamaniacs at the Survivor Series. I’m very glad he pointed out the name of the show we’ve paid to see.

Ted DiBiase is happy that he’s rich.

Jake Roberts is happy for the DDT.

Demolition is glad that they don’t have to fight each other. Fair point.

Randy Savage and Sherri are happy that he’s the only man worthy of being the Macho King.

Jim Duggan loves the USA. Sounds like a run of the mill day for him.

Dino Bravo is glad to have the Earthquake on his side.

Dusty Rhodes likes his polka dots.

Big Boss Man likes dishing out justice.

Brutus Beefcake likes wrestling, strutting and cutting. I wonder in what order.

Rick Martel is glad for his good looks.

Rick Rude is thankful for his ravishing body. Narcissism must run in the Rick family.

Roddy Piper is thankful for not being Ricky Rude.

The Genius….I think you can guess this one.

Mr. Perfect for being perfect. Kind of one dimensional no?

The Bushwhackers are glad for stuffing in turkey. Freaks.

Bobby Heenan is thankful for spending time with his family. The HEENAN Family that is.

The Ultimate Warrior for intensity. I’m stunned.

Vince McMahon narrates a card rundown. There’s something so weird about him being the voiceover guy. I miss those squares that show the match participants. Oh and team names other than Team Insert Name Here. You can’t think of some alliterative name? Like Rotten Writers?

One thing I’m thankful for: that the dark match was dark. This night got started with Boris Zhukov beating Paul Roma. I wouldn’t wish that on Vince Russo.

Enforcers vs. Dream Team

Big Boss Man, Bad News Brown, Rick Martel, Honky Tonk Man
Dusty Rhodes, Brutus Beefcake, Red Rooster, Tito Santana

As usual, this is mainly about the captains, but at least we get some Jive Soul Bro and Brutus Beefcake music, because the 80s were that awesome. Actually almost everyone involved here had great music. Again, the 80s were awesome. Dusty even has Boss Man’s nightstick because stealing things is part of the American dream. Tito and Honky Tonk start things off because Tito vs. Martel on pay per view wasn’t allowed for some reason. An early armbar has Honky Tonk in trouble but a cheap shot allows Martel to come in.

The pace picks way up as they run the ropes and Martel scores with a dropkick. Tito is right back with an atomic drop into a rollup for two so it’s off to Boss Man, who gets armdragged in a hurry. Dusty comes in and you can feel the energy go up. I’m not the biggest fan but that man had more charisma than almost anyone ever. With the dancing jabs out of the way, Brutus comes in and gets pounded down by Boss Man.

Honky Tonk misses a right hand so it’s back to Martel for a backbreaker. Some knees to the back don’t do much so it’s off to Rooster as it becomes clear how much better the names were back then. Boss Man, Dream, Model, Bad News, Brutus and….well ok there was no saving Rooster. Speaking of Rooster, it’s his turn to get beaten up by a revolving door of villains. Ventura is right there talking about how the size difference is working against Rooster, almost like he’s a real analyst.

A sunset flip finally gets two on Honky Tonk and a collision puts both guys down. That’s enough for the tag off to Tito for some serious house cleaning but it’s too early for the Figure Four. Martel slams him down and misses his elbow that always misses. Tito grabs a rollup but Martel reverses into one of his own and a grab of the trunks (not sure how much that would help here) gets rid of Santana at 9:15.

Dusty comes in and we cut to a shot of a “fan”, who will later be named Sapphire. Considering she hasn’t been officially introduced yet and would be gone just after Summerslam 1990, it’s kind of remarkable that she was only around for about nine months. Anyway Martel gets taken down with a dropkick and the big elbow gets two. It’s back to Rooster for what looks like some dancing and a headlock, which is quickly countered into a backbreaker.

The bearhug from Boss Man has Rooster in even more trouble until he bites his way to freedom. Boss Man tags Bad News (again, great names) but he doesn’t want to come in, meaning Rooster has to pull him in. Ever the serious one, Bad News isn’t about to have any of this stupid gimmick and beats the heck out of Rooster.

Boss Man comes in without a tag and accidentally hits Bad News. Oh dear I don’t see this going well. Before Bad News can use them all as floss, he walks out on his teammates and is counted out at 15:30. The melee allows Brutus to come back in and hammer on Boss Man until an elbow to the jaw cuts him down. Honky Tonk comes back in for two off a belly to back suplex and shrugs off some right hands (90% of Brutus’ offense). He can’t shrug off the high knee (5%, along with the sleeper for the remaining 5% as Brutus wasn’t exactly versatile) and it’s 3-2 at 17:24.

Martel comes in next and chinlocks Brutus down, followed by a backbreaker to put Brutus on the apron. Brutus comes back in with a sunset flip though, and after Martel gets caught grabbing the ropes, Boss Man is on his own at 20:13. Rooster comes in (Dusty is kind of a lame partner) and tries some forearms, only to get caught in the Boss Man Slam for the elimination at 21:00. Now Dusty is willing to come in for the big right hands and Brutus adds some chops. Boss Man is rocked so Dusty comes in with with a crossbody for the final pin at 21:59.

Rating: C-. It was dull at times, but there’s only so much you can get out of some of these people. Honky Tonk was past his expiration date, Rooster was Rooster, Brown was barely involved, Tito vs. Martel should have been its own match, and Dusty was only in there for a little while. The match wasn’t bad and it was a good way to start things off, but there were only two feuds of note in the whole match.

Post match Slick throws Boss Man the nightstick and it’s a heck of a beating for Dusty and Brutus. Dusty even gets handcuffed and beaten down on the ropes, drawing some blood. Well….were you expecting anything else from him? Brutus finally makes the save with the clippers.

In the back, Boss Man says Dusty is his prisoner. Well your prisoner is currently in the middle of a big arena and being let out of handcuffs. I see why Boss Man left the prison job.

The 4×4’s, all carrying 2×4’s, are ready for the King’s Court. Bret Hart says it’ll be their finest hour. Ronnie Garvin wants to use his board for uh….things. Hercules doesn’t think they’ll have any problems. Jim Duggan says their team is ready for anything.

4×4’s vs. King’s Court

Jim Duggan, Ronnie Garvin, Bret Hart, Hercules
Randy Savage, Canadian Earthquake, Dino Bravo, Greg Valentine

Yeah it’s the Canadian Earthquake because that you don’t want him confused with the Costa Rican Earthquake. The 4×4’s clear the ring with the boards and then try to toss them to each other. Garvin messes up because he’s Ronnie Garvin and a natural failure. Duggan follows Savage to the floor to start and hands it off to Hercules for a forearm to the back. A gorilla press sends Savage into the corner for a tag to Valentine for the atomic drop and the traditional funny sell job.

Bret comes in to work on the arm and Duggan sends said arm into the buckle. It’s off to Hercules for some forearms on the also legal Bravo but Earthquake comes in, runs him over, and hits the Earthquake for the elimination at 3:57. Duggan tries his luck with some shoulders that have no effect, so Bret gets behind Earthquake to trip him down on a third try. Garvin comes in and I suddenly want to see Earthquake crush him like a grape.

The Court starts taking turns on Garvin, including a top rope ax handle from Savage. A quick backslide gets two on Bravo but it’s already back to Savage for the snap jabs in the corner. Valentine comes back in though and since we’re not ten minutes into the match yet, Duggan makes a blind tag and clotheslines him out to even things up at 7:32.

Savage comes in and snaps Duggan’s throat across the top rope and it’s back to Earthquake for some forearms to the back. The Court is certainly making good tags to take their turns. Earthquake misses the big elbow so it’s off to Garvin to chop and headbutt Bravo. There’s the Garvin Stomp (it’s stupid when Randy Orton does it too) but Bravo rakes the eyes to break up the Sharpshooter.

It’s off to Hart vs. Savage and Randy PANICS as the crowd really wakes up. You better believe those Bret pops were being noticed, even if it took two years to get to the solo run. Savage gets taken down and runs off for the tag to Bravo so Bret beats him up instead. Garvin comes in again and is IMMEDIATELY side suplexed for the elimination at 11:18. I never get over how much Garvin absolutely sucks. He just got pinned clean by DINO BRAVO. What in the world does that say about your career?

Duggan hammers on Earthquake again before handing it back to Bret for a matchup I never knew I wanted to see. Bret wants Savage though and Jesse, a big fan of both guys, is rather pleased by these developments. Savage gets tied up in the ropes and Duggan, ever the All-American, chokes behind the referee’s back. A missed knee drop makes things even worse for Savage and Bret gets two off a backbreaker. Bret misses the middle rope elbow (a regular one as he didn’t have his signature version down yet) though and it’s back to Bravo for the bearhug.

It’s back to Earthquake for some choking and a two count with the fans being rather pleased by the kickout. Bret avoids a Savage charge to send him into Bravo though and now the hot tag brings Duggan back in. For reasons of temporary insanity (or maybe sanity in his case), Savage drives Duggan into his own corner so Hart can tag himself in. A quick missed charge hits the post though and Bravo adds a shoulder breaker, setting up Savage’s elbow for the elimination at 19:07.

So it’s Duggan alone against Bravo, Earthquake and Savage, meaning Jim is looking completely fine. Earthquake unloads on him in the corner and the level of fine is starting to come down. Duggan beats up all three of them without much effort (Behold the power of AMERICA! Ignoring that Savage is from AMERICA of course!) and tosses the whole team outside.

As the announcers try to figure out who is legal, Earthquake comes back in and drops the big elbow for two. Savage hits the ax handle but misses the running crotch attack. Since the guys kind of suck at this, Sherri low bridges Duggan to the floor and it’s a countout at 23:25 to finish Duggan off.

Rating: D+. The strange ending aside (Duggan can’t take a pin here? Not even 3-1 with the new big monster and RANDY SAVAGE on the other team?), this wasn’t all that thrilling of a match. Other than the fans going coconuts for Hart, it was a lot of punching and kicking and very little more. It also wasn’t the biggest surprise, as any team with Hercules and Ronnie Garvin on the team and JIM DUGGAN as the brains of the operation is in serious trouble.

Post match Duggan cleans house with the 2×4.

Dusty Rhodes is very hurt but Gene Okerlund is sure that he’ll be dishing out Americana soon enough.

The Genius has a poem saying he’s smart and how stupid the fans are. That’s such a simple gimmick but it’s one that would work so well today. Give him a guitar and he’s basically Elias with a better vocabulary.

Million Dollar Team vs. Hulkamaniacs

Ted DiBiase, Powers of Pain, Zeus
Hulk Hogan, Demolition, Jake Roberts

I’m not going to explain Zeus in full again because it just makes my head hurt. You know what doesn’t make my head hurt? The most awesome Survivor Series team in the history of the planet. I mean seriously, Hogan, Roberts and Demolition. Someone please try to find something that matches that level of amazing so I can point at you can call you stupid.

Just in case it’s not enough yet, the villains won’t let them in the ring (Jesse: “Count all four of them out!”) so Jake throws Damien in, because the most awesome Survivor Series team in the history of the planet has A BIG FREAKING SNAKE TOO! Still one of my favorite moments ever and something I still throw on if I need a smile.

Zeus wants Hogan to start so Gorilla goes into his weird questions about what the Z on Zeus’ head is for. Like….what else do you think it’s for? He’s a big Zorro fan? I mean, he should be because Zorro is so awesome that he would be first on the list if this team ever needed a fifth man but I still don’t get that rant. Hogan of course can’t hurt Zeus to start as the right hands and clotheslines have no effect.

A jumping knee does nothing so Hogan rakes the eyes and gets in a slam, which does all the damage of a standard slam. Zeus pops up and cranks on Hogan’s neck, in a spot that the Giant would use to put him on the shelf for weeks in WCW. A bunch of choking and a shove of the referee are enough for the DQ to get rid of Zeus at 3:20.

Zeus won’t stop choking and it takes the combined forces of the Powers of Pain and DiBiase offering money to get him off. Hogan is mostly dead so DiBiase comes in to drop some knees. More choking keeps Hogan in trouble but he finally gets a boot up in the corner and brings Jake in. The beating begins in a hurry and it’s off to Demolition for the rapid fire pounding to the back (I could watch that for at least a minute). Hulk is fine enough to come back in for a middle rope ax handle as Gorilla goes on about the Z on Zeus’ head again.

DiBiase elbows Ax in the face and brings in Warlord because the Powers of Pain vs. Demolition is still a thing a year after it was a bigger thing at the previous year’s show. A clothesline gets Ax out of trouble but Mr. Fuji trips him up, allowing Warlord to drop a headbutt for the pin at 9:52.

It’s off to Hogan to beat up Warlord in a match you would think would have happened at some point. Jake comes in and the fans want the DDT but have to settle for Smash hitting an ax handle to the back instead. Not quite the same thing. Barbarian kicks him in the face though and it’s DiBiase coming back in with a middle rope ax handle (the most popular move on the show).

The falling punch (still cool) gets two and we hit the chinlock. DiBiase misses the middle rope falling elbow (as always) but Smash still won’t tag for no apparent reason. Barbarian tags himself in and takes Smash’s head off with a top rope clothesline for the elimination at 13:44. Jake comes in but can’t DDT Barbarian no matter how many times he tries. The beating continues as Hulk is dying for a tag.

Some knee drops and a piledriver get two on Roberts but Barbarian misses the Swan Dive. There’s the hot tag to Hogan (Jesse: “Uh oh.”) and it’s time to clean house. The rapid elbows and a suplex give Hogan two (you don’t see him getting many near falls) and he clotheslines both Powers down. They pop back up and hit a spike piledriver….for a double DQ at 19:51, sending Jesse over the edge in an awesome rant. And yeah, that’s completely bogus, especially with Hogan and Roberts now having a 2-1 advantage over DiBiase.

The Million Dollar Dream has Hogan in trouble and Roberts has to save Hogan at two arm drops (Jesse: “THAT’S THREE TIMES! THREE TIMES! HOW COME ROBERTS WASN’T DISQUALIFIED???”). Hogan fights out of another attempt and punches DiBiase out of the air (because he was trying ANOTHER ax handle). The latest hot tag brings in Roberts for a neck snap across the top rope, giving us another great DiBiase sell.

Cue Virgil with his bad hand so Roberts beats him up too, including a DDT to a big pop. With Roberts down, DiBiase gets in the fist drop and throws his feet on the ropes to get rid of Jake at 23:42. Hogan is still down from the Million Dollar Dream so DiBiase picks him up and hits a clothesline for two. A chinlock goes on and Hogan slaps DiBiase’s arm, which would be shocking to see today. The comeback gives us a double clothesline but Hogan is up first and hits exactly what you would expect to set up the legdrop for the pin at 27:32.

Rating: C-. I love the face team but my goodness they picked a really weird way to get to the finish here. Hogan and company were either even or ahead for most of the match and Hogan just wins with ease in the end. What’s a better way to go here: the usual, or Zeus, who Hogan is feuding with at the moment, wrecking Hogan so badly that DiBiase pins him to set up a title program with DiBiase down the line? I wasn’t feeling this one, but the energy (and Jesse ranting) helped it a lot.

Jesse is LIVID post match, saying the referee probably even disqualified Virgil too.

Savage and Zeus, who face Beefcake and Hogan in a cage match in a few weeks, are ready to take care of business inside the cage. Sherri waving her hands in the background for some reason is a little distracting.

Hogan comes in to Beefcake’s locker room and they’re ready to win in the cage. Sherri comes in and throws powder in their eyes so the beatdown can be on.

We run down the remaining two matches.

As intermission continues, Jesse talks about issues inside the Heenan Family, including pushing and shoving in the locker room.

The Rude Brood is ready to win tonight. Rick Rude talks about his great teammates, Mr. Perfect knows how to get rid of Jimmy Snuka and the Rougeau Brothers have been training extra hard.

Roddy Piper can’t get his team to quit eating before the match. I remember this from when I was a kid and it’s still bizarre.

Rude Brood vs. Roddy’s Rowdies

Rick Rude, Mr. Perfect, Rougeau Brothers
Roddy Piper, Jimmy Snuka, Bushwhackers

There’s no Heenan with Rude, playing up the issues in the Family. Perfect jumps Luke from behind to start so it’s already off to Butch for a bite of the leg. Piper and Snuka bite the arm and it’s back to Butch to bite the back for a second helping. Jacques comes in and nips up but stops for a hug from his brother. We settle down to Jacques flipping over Snuka but getting taken down by a flying headbutt. A chop keeps Jacques in trouble and Snuka….I want to say dances? With Jacques down, the Superfly Splash is good for the elimination at 4:01.

Rude comes in for a leapfrog and a hip swivel before handing it off to Perfect. A botched low bridge sends Perfect outside as the Brood can’t get anything going at all. Luke comes in for a snapmare on Perfect and Snuka punches him in the face. The fast tags continue with Butch coming in for a few knees to the back. Piper’s atomic drop knocks Perfect over for the tag to Raymond, whose backdrop is countered into a sunset flip for two. Raymond gets two off a superkick but Piper grabs a piledriver for the second elimination at 7:39.

Perfect is in next for a snapmare of his own on Piper but gets catapulted into the corner as only Perfect could do. Butch comes in for some near falls off some stomping but a single kick to the chest knocks him into the corner. That means it’s back to Piper for some right hands and a hip swivel at Rick as Perfect is turned inside out. Butch adds another bite but gets rolled up for the elimination at 10:45.

Piper is right back in for a rollup of his own and Snuka adds a top rope chop to the head. It’s Luke’s turn to hammer away and a headbutt to the ribs gets two. Perfect is able to make a tag but Rude gets punched out of the air. Not that it matters though as a kick to the ribs sets up the Rude Awakening to even things up at 12:14.

So now we can have the match that they wanted in the first place, which definitely sounds better. Rude chops Snuka down and throws in a hip swivel before handing it back to Perfect, who gets kicked in the face. It’s already back to Rude for a chinlock, which goes nowhere either so Perfect comes in and gets small packaged for two. You really can tell that the energy has gone out of the arena and they’re just going through the motions with this one.

A ramming of the heads puts Perfect and Snuka down (should have knocked Perfect silly) and there’s the double tag. They slug it out, which is never a good idea against Piper. The fight falls to the floor and it’s a double countout at 18:36. So we’re down to Perfect vs. Snuka with Perfect making the mistake of ramming Snuka’s head into the buckle. Dude have you ever watched a Snuka match? A dropkick puts Snuka on the floor but he’s right back in for a pinfall reversal sequence. Snuka’s high crossbody is reversed into a cover for two but it’s the PerfectPlex to finish him at 21:27.

Rating: D. I’ve never liked this match as it was basically a delayed start until we got to the match that they really wanted to do. It also doesn’t really advance anything as Snuka vs. Perfect wasn’t a feud and Piper vs. Rude is right where it was before. At least Perfect got the win though and that’s what really matters, because he should have been ready to move up into the main event.

Post match Snuka goes after Perfect and Genius but the smart (and perfect) villains get away.

The Rude Brood says to not worry about Heenan’s whereabouts and promise to celebrate the ravishing way.

The Ultimate Warriors are ready to go. Jim Neidhart laughs a lot, the Rockers are their usual confident selves, and Ultimate Warrior says they all have organ donor cards. My goodness imagine the drug bills.

Ultimate Warriors vs. Heenan Family

Ultimate Warrior, Rockers, Jim Neidhart
Andre the Giant, Arn Anderson, Haku, Bobby Heenan

Heenan is out there because Tully Blanchard failed a drug test and is leaving, never to wrestle in a national promotion again. The fight starts before Warrior even shows up but here he is to save Neidhart as the bell rings. Three clotheslines put Andre on the floor and it’s a countout at 27 seconds, which is totally different than Zeus being eliminated earlier. Anderson’s “DANG IT” face is great, as always.

We settle down to Anderson getting beaten up by anyone who can get their hands on him, including the running tackle in the corner from Neidhart. Andre finally gets up and staggers out, with the Rockers getting in a few cheap shots. Haku comes in for some forearms to the back and Heenan chokes in the corner as Jesse says he would take Heenan over Gorilla in a fight. Before Gorilla can freak out, Haku superkicks Neidhart for the elimination at 3:31.

Michaels comes in to pick up the pace with a monkey flip before it’s off to Marty to start on the arm. Marty’s crossbody is caught but Shawn hits the dropkick to the back for the near fall. It’s back to Anderson, who can’t get a suplex, but Haku comes in to make it a double suplex, which is caught by Shawn in a nice save. Double superkicks get two and it’s off to Warrior for a backdrop. Heenan refuses the tag (well duh) so Anderson gets caught in an armbar instead.

Anderson takes him down with a shot to the ribs, hands it off to Heenan for a kick to the ribs, and then comes back in when Heenan gets touched once. That was the only way to go and it’s worth a chuckle. Anderson beats the heck out of Jannetty and Haku adds a few shots to knock Jannetty silly. Heenan comes back in for some stomps on Jannetty and a knee drop….for the clean pin at 8:54.

Egads how far have you fallen when you’re losing clean falls to Heenan? It’s instantly back to Anderson, who gets caught in Warrior’s bearhug. A rake to the eyes gets Anderson out of trouble so Haku gets bearhugged as well. It’s off to Michaels, who gets sent outside so Warrior has to toss him back inside. Heenan’s front facelock doesn’t work so here’s Anderson again for some stomping in the corner. Shawn is back up and rubs Anderson’s face into the mat, blinding him so badly that he tries to tag Warrior.

A Rocket Launcher gives Shawn two but for some reason it wakes Anderson up enough to take over again and bring in Haku. That just means a missed charge though and Shawn gets rid of him with a high crossbody at 12:54, leaving us with Shawn/Warrior vs. Anderson/Heenan. Four Hall of Famers isn’t too shabby. Heenan is willing to come in and punch Shawn a few times but Warrior scares him into the corner.

With Michaels on the floor, Heenan goes up (oh dear)…but climbs back down a few seconds later with a fit of sanity coming over him. Heenan refuses a tag so Anderson gets sunset flipped for two, sending him into a frenzy over the lack of a tag. Shawn gets knocked down so it’s back to Heenan, who tags out almost immediately again. Anderson wins a slugout and scores with some headbutts to the ribs in the corner as Warrior is shaking his head for some reason. Odd man indeed. There’s the spinebuster to get rid of Michaels at 15:48, though Anderson can barely move.

Some running shoulders have Anderson in trouble but he sidesteps a charging Warrior to send him outside. Heenan goes up again and again comes back down. Now Heenan is willing to come back in but when the no selling begins, Heenan’s time in the ring quickly comes to an end. Anderson sends him into the corner but Heenan won’t tag in again, probably being as smart as he can. Warrior rams them together and hits the gorilla press into the splash to get rid of Anderson at 18:16.

Reality hasn’t set in yet for Heenan so Warrior sneaks up on him…giving us a hilarious visual as Heenan slowly turns around. Jesse: “You’re loving this aren’t you Monsoon?” The beating begins in a hurry and Heenan is thrown over the corner to the floor. That’s enough for Heenan but Warrior throws him back inside for a shoulder and the splash for the final pin at 20:27.

Rating: D+. Heenan alone almost made this entertaining but there’s only so much that even he could do. The wrestling isn’t the point here and there’s nothing wrong with that. Warrior winning was never in doubt as his biggest challenge was eliminated in less than thirty seconds. Not a good match, but Heenan made it fun enough.

Post match Heenan staggers to the back, with Warrior running up behind him for one more clothesline.

A stills package ends the show to Warrior’s music.

Overall Rating: D. This one really didn’t work very well with a lot of punching and kicking matches and very little else. The storylines weren’t so much advanced as much as just storylines staying in one place. Having Hogan in the middle and Warrior in the main event was certainly an experiment but it was more odd than anything else. The energy goes away at the end of the third match and you can feel it being gone. I love it for the nostalgia, but there’s just not enough here.

Ratings Comparison

Dream Team vs. Enforcers

Original: B-
2012 Redo: C+
2018 Redo: C-

King’s Court vs. 4x4s

Original: B+
2012 Redo: D+
2018 Redo: D+

Hulkamaniacs vs. Million Dollar Team

Original: D-
2012 Redo: C
2018 Redo: C-

Rude Brood vs. Roddy’s Rowdies

Original: D
2012 Redo: C-
2018 Redo: D

Ultimate Warriors vs. Heenan Family

Original: C+
2012 Redo: C-
2018 Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: D+
2012 Redo: D
2018 Redo: D

My original reviews continue to amaze me.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

Survivor Series Count-Up – 1989 (Original): What A Weird Match

And the 2012 redo:

Survivor Series Count-Up – 1989 (2012): Bonus Round

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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Survivor Series Count-Up – 1987 (2022 Redo): They Found The Magic Word

Survivor Series 1987
Date: November 26, 1987
Location: Richfield Coliseum, Richfield, Ohio
Attendance: 21,300
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Jesse Ventura

This is the requested redo so we’ll go all the way back to the beginning of the series, which was quite the mess in its own right. The WWF had tried some elimination tags at house shows and they got over huge so it was time to run a full event of the things. If they could happen to screw over the NWA with its first pay per view on the same day, Starrcade 1987, so be it of course. Let’s get to it.

The Fink welcomes us to the show and introduces Jesse and Gorilla for commentary, which is a weird thing to see. I’m not sure I can ever remember WWF doing it otherwise. Monsoon’s first line of the show: “What are you doing Jess?” They intro the show and send us to the intro video, which could be on just about any weekend show.

Commentary goes over all of the matches in their always good conversational style. It’s fine that they disagree at times, but there are times where it feels like they are two people who respect each other and are even friends. That is so badly missing from commentary today.

We go over the rules of a Survivor Series match. It’s so weird having a time where that wasn’t commonly known.

The Honky Tonk Man is ready to go because he has an amazing team put together, even down to the managers. As for tonight, he might even SHAKE RATTLE AND ROLL ELIZABETH! Well that’s just not very nice. I love these group shots of the wrestlers, as not only do you get what most of them are, but it also screams 1980s so hard. Throw in Hercules looking like his head is about to explode and it’s even better.

Team Randy Savage wants to destroy everyone, with Hacksaw Jim Duggan especially wanting to take out Harley Race for hitting him with his own 2×4. Savage being all over the top is….well very Savage really.

Team Honky Tonk Man vs. Team Randy Savage

Honky Tonk Man, Ron Bass, Danny Davis, Harley Race, Hercules
Randy Savage, Ricky Steamboat, Jake Roberts, Jim Duggan, Brutus Beefcake

Entrances take forever, as we have ten people coming to the ring, with Jesse being in awe of Randy Savage’s entrance (fair enough, and Jesse was always a big Savage guy). Beefcake and Hercules get to make history as the first people ever to start a Survivor Series match, apparently as per the captains’ choice (which didn’t last long). A lockup goes nowhere so Beefcake tries strutting as Gorilla says the possible combinations of numbers are endless. Actually if my math is right it’s about 30 but I don’t question Gorilla.

A shoulder drops Beefcake but he’s right back with a quickly broken sleeper. Davis comes in and Beefcake cleans house without much trouble before pulling Davis back in. It’s off to Roberts to work on the arm and the good guys get to take turns on Davis. For some reason Roberts and Duggan tell Savage to hand it off to Steamboat instead of one of them, leaving Steamboat to miss a charge into the corner. Race comes in and gets in a few shots, only for Steamboat to chop him in the head.

Back to back skinnings of the cat leave Race frustrated so Steamboat throws him over the top instead. Steamboat brings Duggan in to slug Race outside and it’s a double countout for the first eliminations at 4:39. Back in and it’s Bass slamming Roberts but missing an elbow, allowing Savage to give him a running knee. Savage makes the mistake of going after Honky Tonk Man though, allowing the villains to get in a cheap shot. Bass comes back in and since it’s Ron Bass, Savage escapes with no trouble and brings in Beefcake for the high knee and the pin on Bass at 7:01.

Hercules comes in and takes over on Beefcake’s arm, allowing Honky Tonk Man to do the same. Beefcake punches his way to freedom, including a weird double punch that you would think someone else would have used before. Davis gets in a cheap shot from the apron though and Shake Rattle and Roll finishes Beefcake at 10:51.

As we get the world’s first and still only STEVE LOMBARDI RULES sign in the crowd, Savage comes in to chase after Honky Tonk Man but gets jumped by the legal Hercules instead. Dang man pay attention. For some reason Davis is allowed to come in and hammer on Savage, who elbows him in the head. It’s off to Roberts who can’t DDT Honky Tonk Man but can charge into a raised knee in the corner (which always looks painful). Davis comes back in (oh boy) for some shots to the ribs but Roberts shrugs it off and hits the short arm clothesline, setting up the DDT for the pin at 15:11.

Hercules is right there to take over on Roberts though, with Honky Tonk Man drawing in Savage, who is a bit too obsessed with revenge at this point (shocking I know). The chinlock goes on as commentary debates the merits of having the crowd on your side. Roberts fights up and knee lifts Honky Tonk Man away but Hercules is right there for his own chinlock. A jawbreaker gets Roberts out of trouble and the hot tag brings in Steamboat to clean house. The top rope chop to the head sets up the tag to Savage (Jesse: “Uh oh.”) for the top rope elbow and the pin at 21:04.

So it’s Honky Tonk Man vs. Savage/Roberts/Steamboat, with Savage missing a charge into the corner to give Honky Tonk Man a breather. Steamboat comes right back in and chops away before handing it off to Roberts to keep up the rotating beating. An atomic drop sends Honky Tonk Man over the top and that’s enough for him as he takes the countout (smartest thing he’s ever done) to wrap it up at 23:43.

Rating: B-. This is how you open a new concept show as you had stars that people cared about with a wide variety of eliminations and situations. It’s a good way to get the fans into what they’re seeing, with Savage doing everything he could to get his hands on Honky Tonk Man. Very fun match and a great choice to get things going.

Team Andre the Giant is ready to crush Hulk Hogan and friends tonight, with Slick being VERY over the top and Bobby Heenan being incredibly confident. One Man Gang, who is a huge man in his own right, being absolutely dwarfed by Andre is an amazing visual. Granted the closeup of Andre’s face as he says he’s coming for Hogan’s soul with his eyes bugging out is even worse.

Team Fabulous Moolah vs. Team Sensational Sherri

Fabulous Moolah, Rockin Robin, Velvet McIntyre, Jumping Bomb Angels
Sensational Sherri, Donna Christianello, Dawn Marie, Glamour Girls

It’s so weird to see a women’s match in this era but there is more than enough talent to make this work. For some reason Moolah is announced at 160lbs, which can’t be correct and certainly seems to offend her. Sherri jumps McIntyre to start fast and drops her with a running clothesline. Moolah comes in to beat on Sherri so Christianello comes in to get dropkicked by McIntyre. A victory roll gets rid of Christianello at 1:59 so it’s Robin coming in to dropkick Martin (Judy Martin of the Glamour Girls).

Sherri comes in for her own dropkick and hands it off to Marie (not THAT Dawn Marie, in a joke that no one has ever made before I’m sure), who is crossbodied for the pin at 4:11. Itsuki (of the Angels) comes in blows Jesse’s mind (you can tell he’s actually impressed) with her rollups and kicks to Kai. Sherri comes in and gets suplexed by Tateno, with Jesse being amazed that the champ is getting beaten up like this. Robin monkey flips Kai but gets pulled into the wrong corner so the beating can be on. Sherri hits a suplex to get rid of Robin at 6:56.

Tateno takes Robin’s place and is thrown around by the hair (OUCH) to put her in the corner. McIntyre comes in for a spinning crossbody (cool) and Moolah follows up with a dropkick. It’s off to Itsuki, who slams Kai off the top but misses a dropkick (popular move in this one). Moolah gets to hammer away a bit more but a blind tag lets Martin hit a clothesline for the pin at 8:57.

As commentary DOESN’T panic at the idea of the captain being eliminated, McIntyre comes in to Boston crab Martin. With that falling apart, McIntyre wisely switches to a bow and arrow, which doesn’t last long either. Sherri grabs a suplex, which leaves McIntyre landing kind of awkwardly on her neck/shoulders and she’s almost immediately over for a tag to Tateno. Martin suplexes Tateno for two and a bell in a rare timekeeper’s botch, with commentary IMMEDIATELY saying not so fast (take notes Michael Cole).

McIntyre’s back is fine enough to come in for a giant swing on Sherri, followed by another victory roll (which clearly in a lot of pain) and the pin at 14:56. Tateno comes back in as McIntyre can barely get out of the ring and has to almost lay on the apron. Kai blocks a suplex so it’s back to McIntyre, who tries another victory roll but gets slingshotted into an electric chair (that looked good) for the pin at 17:23. That would be McIntyre’s last match for over a month so there was something wrong.

We’re down to the Angels vs. the Girls with Tateno wasting no time in hitting a high crossbody to get rid of Kai at 18:43. Martin is on her own and starts with a fireman’s carry drop for two on Tateno. Itsuki comes back in for a top rope knee, Tateno dropkicks Jimmy Hart off the apron, and Itsuki adds a top rope clothesline for the pin at 20:18.

Rating: C. The wrestling wasn’t the best for the most part, but what is impressive here is that they had ten women who could put together a completely watchable match like this one. Women’s wrestling in the 80s gets a bad reputation but they were a genuine part of the card and had good matches in the right circumstances. This didn’t feel out of place whatsoever and the Angels were a total highlight so this was quite the fine use of 20+ minutes.

Team Hart Foundation, minus the national anthem singing Bolsheviks, are ready to win. A disheveled Jimmy Hart comes in and wants revenge.

Team Strike Force, not minus singing Russians, are ready to win.

Team Strike Force vs. Team Hart Foundation

Strike Force, Fabulous Rougeau Brothers, Killer Bees, British Bulldogs, Young Stallions
Hart Foundation, Demolition, New Dream Team, Bolsheviks, Islanders

If someone is eliminated, their partner is gone too. Volkoff jumps Martel to start and shrugs off a rollup without much trouble. Zhukov comes in and misses an elbow so it’s off to Santana for the flying forearm and the pin at 1:45. It’s off to Ax for the standard Demolition forearms to the back before Jacques gets to work on Bravo’s arm. The rapid fire tags leave us with Dynamite being dragged into the corner for a chop off with Haku.

Dynamite gets Haku over so the Bees can start in on his hamstrings and it’s off to Roma. Neidhart slams him down and Haku drops him with a clothesline. Smash’s slam sends Roma into the corner for the tag to Jacques, who is quickly dropped and pinned by Smash at 5:50.

Powers comes in and gets put on Neidhart’s shoulder for a top rope forearm from Haku (that’s a cool move and could have been a decent finisher for a team) and two. It’s back to Roma, who gets shouldered breakered and suplexed by Valentine. Smash misses a charge though and it’s Dynamite coming in to get kicked in the face. The beating continues but Smash throws the referee down and that’s a DQ at 9:22.

Powers sends Tama into the corner and gets clotheslined for his efforts as neither Gorilla nor Jesse can get Tama’s (Haku/Toma) name right. Martel comes in to dropkick Tama but he’s WAY too close to the ropes for the Boston crab. Neidhart makes the save so Santana comes in with the flying forearm, meaning Hart has to make a save. It’s such a save that Neidhart pins Santana at 12:05 as the field has thinned quite a bit (as it needed to).

As Jesse talks about his great great great grandfather Ephraim the Body coming over on the Mayflower, Bret hits a backbreaker on Powers and Tama adds a top rope knee for two. Oddly enough, Hart allows powers to get over for a tag to Roma, which felt rather out of the norm for him. It’s right back to Powers as Jesse wonders why the beaten up Stallions wouldn’t tag in a fresh Bee or Bulldog. Roma gets knocked into the corner for the tag to Dynamite, who suplexes Hart for a fast two.

Bulldog headbutts Haku over and over and somehow doesn’t knock himself silly. Powers misses a charge and gets taken into the wrong corner but it’s right back to Bulldog. The gorilla press gets two on Bret and the running powerslam gets the same on Haku. Dynamite adds the flying headbutt and knocks himself silly on Haku’s head, with Jesse going right into the rant about how stupid that was. A superkick gets rid of the Bulldogs at 19:59 and we’re down to Harts/Islanders/Dream Team vs. Bees/Stallions.

The Dream Team takes over on Powers as commentary talks about how the villains don’t really like each other anyway. The side slam drops Powers, who kicks away Valentine’s Figure Four attempt. That’s enough for Roma to come in off the top with a sunset flip to pin Valentine at 23:29.

Blair comes in for a jumping knee for two on Neidhart so Hart gets to try his luck. A headlock drags Roma over for the tag to Tama, who kicks Roma down without much effort. Haku misses a legdrop though, allowing Blair to hit his own legdrop for two. Roma comes back in and gets suplexed so Tama can rip at Roma’s eyes.

Haku hits a dropkick and Gorilla says he’d like to see Neidhart try that. Before the words are out of his mouth, Neidhart hits his own dropkick in a spot so perfectly timed that it had to have been a coincidence. Brunzell comes in and tries to slam Hart but Tama kicks him down…with Brunzell rolling through to pin Hart at 29:29.

So it’s the Islanders vs. the Bees/Stallions, with Tama going right to the nerve hold. Haku comes in for a nerve hold of his own before it’s back to Tama for the third nerve hold. A suplex mixes things up a bit for two but Brunzell manages to knock his way to freedom. Roma comes back in for two off a powerslam but Haku takes him down again. Jesse praises the Islanders for being saucy with hard heads as Haku misses an elbow, allowing the diving tag back to Brunzell. Gorilla isn’t sure what’s up with that as a masked Killer Bee (their method of cheating) slingshots in with a sunset flip to pin Tama for the win at 37:16.

Rating: A-. This was all about the talent involved as you had one great combination after another. The Stallions and Bees getting the glory in the end was a little weird but points for trying to put someone else over. Good stuff here and all the proof you need that this was the golden age for tag team wrestling, as there were all kinds of good to great teams in there and it doesn’t feel anywhere near the forty minutes that it runs.

Ted DiBiase talks about how great Thanksgiving is and we see a montage of him doing horrible things to people. Of note: a boy who gets a basketball kicked away from him is one Rob Van Dam. Then DiBiase has a catered dinner because he is one of the best villains in the history of wrestling.

Commentary talks about the show so far, with Jesse thinking that Honky Tonk Man did the right thing by walking away instead of risking an injury. This is the friendly chat that made their commentary feel real as compared to the constant yelling and insulting exchanges that you see too often with modern heel commentators.

Jesse is also REALLY impressed by the Jumping Bomb Angels, saying that the Glamour Girls (Women’s Tag Team Champions) are in trouble. He compares the Angels to a Dynamite Kid, a Ricky Steamboat or a Randy Savage, saying “that was fantastic, I enjoyed it”. That is how you put a team over. On the other hand, Jesse isn’t happy with the Killer Bees using their mask trick and wants an investigation. They’re both really looking forward to the main event though, because Hulk Hogan is getting back in the ring with Andre the Giant.

Honky Tonk Man insists that he is the real survivor and will face Hulk Hogan any time. This is pretty clearly intermission as they wait around on the main event, which makes sense on a four match show.

Team Hulk Hogan is VERY fired up with Hogan talking about how hungry the team is. That bandanna with the tassels hanging down over Hogan’s eyes is always a weird look.

Team Hulk Hogan vs. Team Andre The Giant

Hulk Hogan, Don Muraco, Ken Patera, Paul Orndorff, Bam Bam Bigelow
Andre The Giant, Rick Rude, One Man Gang, Butch Reed, King Kong Bundy

Bobby Heenan handles Andre’s introduction, which is a very Heenan thing of him to do. Hogan of course gets his own entrance, which is a very Hogan thing to do….but egads you can hear the reaction when he comes out with that American flag. Jesse: “I’m not even going to try to talk over this.” Gorilla: “Good thinking.” Muraco and Rude start things off with Rude hammering away in the corner. Orndorff comes in and knocks Rude into the corner so Hogan can come in for a very rare meeting with Rude (they didn’t like each other).

It’s off to Bigelow for the running headbutt and a gorilla press as they’re certainly starting fast. Patera screws up (shocking) by knocking Rude into the corner for the tag to Reed, who gets dropkicked down by Muraco. Orndorff hits some dropkicks of his own as even Jesse says Andre’s team isn’t doing so well so far. Hogan drops the leg and that’s it for Reed at 3:04….and it’s Andre time.

Some high fives to Patera count as a tag though and Jesse is ALL OVER Joey Marella for calling that a tag and trying to save Hogan again. Hogan protests too but doesn’t think about, you know, tagging right back in, leaving Andre to say the heck with Patera and hand it off to Bundy.

Some forearms don’t go anywhere so it’s off to Gang, who gets knocked into the corner by Orndorff. Rude comes back in and gets elbowed and slammed, with Jesse saying Rude just isn’t having a good night. Patera manages to crossbody Gang down for two but gets taken into the wrong corner so the beating can ensue. Gang and Patera hit double clotheslines but Gang falls on him for the pin at 8:44.

Hogan comes in to hammer on Gang (that’s his bread and butter), setting up a double big boot with Bigelow. Gang gets over to tag in Rude, who gets beaten down again by Orndorff. A cheap shot from Bundy breaks up the piledriver though and Rude grabs a rollup with trunks for the pin at 10:22.

Save for a house show feud with Rude, that was it for Orndorff in the WWF. Muraco comes in to powerslam Rude for the pin at 11:10, leaving us with Muraco/Hogan Bigelow vs. Gang/Bundy/Andre. Bundy misses a knee drop and Muraco is smart enough to go right after that leg. It’s already back to Gang, who falls on top of Muraco during a slam attempt. The big splash is enough to finish Muraco at 12:54.

Bigelow comes in and gets clotheslined right back down by Bundy. Hogan has to make a save, with Gorilla immediately saying that he has a five count to get out. Jesse doesn’t stand for that (good for him) as Bundy comes in to hammer on Bigelow. Jesse: “You won’t see any hair pulling here.”. It’s off to Andre but Bigelow rolls over for the tag to Hogan and OH YEAH the fans are into this. Hogan wins a chop/slug out but gets pulled to the floor. Hogan slams Gang and Bundy….but gets counted out at 18:13, leaving even Jesse stunned. Since it’s Hogan, he refuses to leave until he is threatened with a forfeit.

So it’s Bigelow vs. Andre/Bundy/Gang as Jesse praises Gang and Bundy for being glorified pawns to get rid of Hogan. Bigelow stretches a bit before jumping on Bundy to start fast. A clothesline sets up a falling headbutt for two but a dropkick doesn’t drop Bundy. Instead Bigelow takes him down by the leg and a slingshot splash gets rid of Bundy at 20:48. It’s off to Gang, with Jesse saying he can pick which of Bigelow’s tattoos he wants to hit.

Bigelow charges into a boot in the corner so Gang goes up top (uh oh) and misses a splash, allowing Bigelow to get the pin at 23:05. That means it’s Andre vs. Bigelow and I think you know where this is going. A big right hand knocks Bigelow into the ropes but he holds on to avoid a big boot. Bigelow rolls away a few times but gets caught in the corner for the shoulders. A butterfly suplex/hiptoss finishes Bigelow at 24:21.

Rating: C+. This was more or less the semi-sequel to Hogan vs. Andre at Wrestlemania III and Andre wins to help rebuild him. The big rematch was coming later of course, but for now, Andre wins and that is enough to keep things going. The rest of the match was only so good, but what matters here is getting Andre back to being a force and making Bigelow look like the next big thing, even if he was all but done in about six months.

Post match Hogan IMMEDIATELY runs out and beats up Andre to clear the ring. Andre wants to come back in but Bobby Heenan holds him off and says not until Hogan signs on the totted line. Hogan poses a lot and yeah there’s no defending how much of a sore loser he’s being here.

In the back, Heenan and Andre say if Hogan wants Andre, sign the contract for another title match.

Hogan is STILL posing and Gorilla is STILL defending him as Jesse is thrilled at the idea of getting out of Cleveland.

A highlight package wraps us up.

Overall Rating: B. The word here is fun. This is a show that had a concept and they RAN with it, giving us a very entertaining night. No it wasn’t anything that really mattered for the most part, but some of the falls and results could be spun off for months on the house show circuit. The big there here though is that they put a bunch of people (fifty wrestlers in four matches is nuts) on the show so you were almost guaranteed to see someone you liked and it would be hard to not have a good time. I’ve seen this show more often than I can count and it absolutely holds up as a hidden gem of the Golden Era. Check this out if you can.

 

Ratings Comparison

Team Randy Savage vs. Team Honky Tonk Man

Original: B+
2012 Redo: B
2022 Redo: B-

Team Sherri Martel vs. Team Fabulous Moolah

Original: C+
2012 Redo: C+
2022 Redo: C

Team Hart Foundation vs. Team Strike Force

Original: B
2012 Redo: C-
2022 Redo: A-

Team Hogan vs. Team Andre the Giant

Original: B
2012 Redo: B-
2022 Redo: C+

Overall Rating

Original: A-
2012 Redo: B+
2022 Redo: B

It’s still a good show but WHAT WAS I THINKING ON THAT TAG MATCH???

Here is the original if you’re interested:

And the 2012 Redo:

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Summerslam Count-Up – Summerslam 2006 (2021 Redo): It Doesn’t Feel Big

Summerslam 2006
Date: August 20, 2006
Location: TD Banknorth Garden, Boston, Massachusetts
Attendance: 16,168
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz, Joey Styles, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re finally here and just like all the other times I’ve seen this show, it still doesn’t feel all that big. Nothing on the card really stands out above the rest as some major match, but instead we are getting a bunch of important matches at once. That isn’t a bad thing, but it did make for kind of an odd setup. Let’s get to it.

The opening video talks about the history of the show….and then the DX logo pops up as we talk about DX vs. the McMahons, followed by everything else.

Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero

They’re fighting over Eddie Guerrero’s memory, so we look at both videos from Smackdown, focusing on both of their relationships with them. So yes, it does come off as a pay per view match based on people arguing over who was Eddie’s real best friend. This is also Chavo’s return from retirement, despite the fact that he was on almost every TV show since retiring. Rey hammers away to start fast as JBL goes on a rant about the Guerrero family as only he can.

Chavo tries a shoulder breaker but gets sent outside, where he manages to avoid Rey’s dive. Chavo’s dive connects and it’s time to choke away back in to the corner. Rey comes back out of another corner and kicks away at the leg, only to be sent head first into the buckle. The fans chant for Eddie as Rey is knocked outside but comes back up top, right next to Chavo. They both hit a big facebuster back to the mat and it’s a bit of a breather. Rey is back up with a kick to the head and there’s the 619.

Chavo counters the seated senton though, meaning Rey has to hurricanrana him over the top for a double crash to the floor. Cue Vickie Guerrero to yell at Chavo and slap him in the face. Rey takes him down with a dive and they head back inside to exchange Three Amigos each. It’s Rey going up top but Vickie crotches him down, allowing Chavo to hit a brainbuster. The frog splash finishes Rey off.

Rating: C+. The match was good, as you would expect from these two, but egads the battle of these two over Eddie’s memory was hard to watch. I know it’s the logical way to go, but at the same time it feels like it’s being designed to set up some big Eddie return, which doesn’t seem that likely. I’m sure we’ll be seeing more of these two together and hopefully that does not include hearing Eddie’s name every fourth word.

Queen Sharmell and King Booker are ready to face Batista but here are Edge and Lita to interrupt. They argue over who is the most powerful couple, with Booker calling him a squire. The champs make a bet: if Edge loses his title, he has to kiss Booker’s feet but if Booker loses his title, Booker he has to be Edge’s servant. I’m still not sure if these champion vs. champion scenes matter quite as much as WWE thinks they do.

ECW World Title: Big Show vs. Sabu

Big Show is defending under ECW Rules. Sabu chairs him down to start and hits a quick Arabian facebuster for two. Show isn’t having that and knocks both Sabu and the chair down. The bearhug goes on for a few seconds, followed by a fall away slam to send Sabu flying. Sabu finds another chair though and knocks Show silly, followed by a top rope chair shot to do it again. It’s table time, but first Sabu hits a top rope bulldog. Sabu drives him through the table in the corner but Show is right back up to run him over.

A Vader Bomb connects, with Sabu rolling outside as Show grabs the steps. Two sets of steps are thrown in and a table is bridged between them. Sabu uses the breather to climb onto the table, which falls down, then reset it and DDT show through it for….well nothing as he doesn’t bother to cover. Instead, Sabu sets up another table and is quickly chokeslammed through it to retain Show’s title.

Rating: C. They did what they had to do well enough here, as they didn’t stay out there too long and had Sabu use all of his weapons to cover up all of the issues. I’m not sure how much of a doubt there was about who was leaving as champion, but now I’m curious to see who is next for Sabu. This could have been much worse so I’ll call that a win.

We look at Layla winning the Diva Search.

Layla comes into the locker room where some of the women brag about her cover on a magazine. Trish Stratus goes on a rant about what everyone else had to do to get here. But it’s ok because Layla is one of them now. Then they take her into the shower and soak her for her initiation. I know the idea of a bunch of Divas in the shower is a simple concept, but it loses its steam when they are in their usual clothes.

We recap Hulk Hogan vs. Randy Orton. Legend meets Legend Killer, who was also hitting on the Legend’s daughter.

Randy Orton vs. Hulk Hogan

They lock up to start with Hogan shoving him down to hit the posing. Orton has some more luck with a headlock, but he gets shoved away again without much effort. Hogan powers out of another headlock and shoves Orton down again but this time Orton gets in a cheap shot and stomps away. You don’t try to ram him into the buckle though as Hogan blocks the shot and hammers away in the corner, as only he can. A thumb to the eye and more right hands set up a clothesline to keep Orton in trouble.

There are the back rakes as JR talks about Hogan’s heeling days in the AWA. Orton bails to the floor where he grabs Hogan’s knee and rams it into the apron. Back in and the circle stomp keeps Hogan in trouble but he ducks the high crossbody. The big boot misses though and Orton nails the dropkick. The RKO connects for three but Hogan’s foot is on the rope just in time. There’s the Hulk Up and the big boot into the legdrop finishes Orton.

Rating: D+. I’m always going to be a Hulkamaniac but what in the world was this? Hogan comes in, shrugs off almost everything Orton has, and wins in about eleven minutes? It’s a feel good moment and such but this serves Hogan and Hogan only, which makes me think he probably had a lot to do with the decision. Orton could have used this win and while it won’t destroy him, the loss doesn’t exactly feel like the smartest move. The match wasn’t even that good, as Hogan dominated for the first half, got beaten down for a bit and then went to the finish with some pretty limited drama.

Posing ensues post match.

Melina gives Mick Foley a pep talk but Mick is worried about the kind of mood Flair is in. She also doesn’t want Foley to lose and damage her reputation as the manager of champions. Foley is fired up too though and seems ready to go.

Mick Foley vs. Ric Flair

I Quit match so Foley brings in a trashcan full of weapons. Foley starts fast and hits the running knee in the corner. The Mandible Claw goes on about a minute in but Foley lets go to ask Flair if he quits. Since Flair can’t speak at the moment, Foley puts barbed wire around Mr. Socko, allowing Flair to grab him low. Flair puts on the barbed wire Socko and chops him out to the floor.

There’s the big whip into the steps but Foley grabs a barbed wire board to hack Flair up as well. The fans sound like they want fire as Foley chokes with a boot. There’s another barbed wire board shot to the face and then one to Flair’s back but he still won’t quit. Flair is COVERED in blood and Foley pouring out the thumbtacks isn’t going to make it better. Foley slams him onto the tacks but Flair still won’t quit, so let’s bring in a barbed wire baseball bat.

Thankfully Flair gets in a low blow and sends Foley shoulder first into the post. Flair hits Foley’s arm with the bat but Foley won’t quit, even with threats of Flair killing him. A big shot knocks Foley off the apron and into the Nestea Plunge, onto a trashcan for a cushion. The trainer comes out to say Foley can’t continue but Flair isn’t having that. Instead he throws Foley back inside, sending him right through the thumbtacks.

Flair goes for the eyes with the barbed wire bat as Melina is out here begging for mercy. The bat is driven into Foley’s face so Melina throws in the towel to quit for him. Flair kicks Foley low and demands that Foley be the one to quit. With nothing else working, Flair grabs the bat and goes for Melina, which is enough for Foley to quit.

Rating: B-. This one is likely going to have a lot of different opinions, but the biggest problem is that I didn’t exactly enjoy the match. Above all else, it was too violent (and yes I know that was the point) for and there was so much blood between two people who probably shouldn’t be doing this to themselves anymore. Then there is the Melina thing which is a real life friendship, but it came out of almost nowhere on WWE TV. I get why Foley quit to save her, though it isn’t like some big epic moment or friendship between the two. They did what they were supposed to do, but it wasn’t something I could really enjoy.

Foley is COVERED in blood and can barely stand.

The McMahons are warming up with Armando Alejandro Estrada in their office. Estrada promises that Umaga will be there to hold them against DX.

Smackdown World Title: Booker T. vs. Batista

Booker is defending. They take turns shoving each other into the corner to start until Booker slaps him in the face. That earns him a big push down so Booker chops away. It doesn’t exactly work though as Booker grabs a Stunner over the to rope and nails a hot shot to keep Batista down.

We hit the chinlock for a bit, with Batista fighting up for a belly to belly. They head outside, where Sharmell slips Booker the scepter to hit Batista in the face. Booker takes him back inside to crank on the arm and then switches back to the chinlock. The fans talk about a certain disease they claim Sharmell has as Batista fights up to crotch Booker on the top.

It’s back to the floor with Batista being distracted by Sharmell and sent into the steps. The Book End gives Booker two but the ax kick misses, setting up a Jackhammer for two on the champ. The Batista Bomb is loaded up but Sharmell comes in for the DQ. You can’t even say it was a long match for that lame of an ending.

Rating: D+. I’m not sure if you can call this a clash of styles but they didn’t have much of a flow to the match and the ending was even worse. This will set up a rematch on the next pay per view but I’m not sure I want to see it again. The match wasn’t the worst but it isn’t the kind of match I want to see again. If nothing else, you would think the World Title match would get more than eleven minutes but it doesn’t even hit that, leaving this feeling like a match that they had because it was required instead of something they wanted to feature.

Post match Batista wrecks Booker again to set up the rematch.

DX is talking to someone in the men’s locker room. They seem to have backup.

We recap D-Generation X vs. the McMahon, DX has tormented Vince and Shane for months now so now the McMahons (and their band of mercenaries, meaning Umaga and the Spirit Squad) are dealing with this here.

Vince McMahon/Shane McMahon vs. D-Generation X

DX does their usual intro and we’re ready to go. Actually hold on as the McMahons stay on the stage and send out the Spirit Squad. DX dispatches them in a hurry so here are Mr. Kennedy, Finlay and William Regal, who are beaten up after just a bit more time. Now it’s Big Show to take Shawn out while the other three beat up HHH on the floor. HHH gets put through the announcers’ table and NOW the McMahons are willing to head to the ring.

Vince slams Shawn down as we officially start, setting up Shane with the jabs. The bosses take turns beating Shawn down, though Shane is smart enough to hit the floor and stomp HHH down. A double suplex sets up a Paisan elbow and Shane takes HHH down again. There’s a Demolition Decapitator (JR: “They think they’re Demolition.”) into a Hart Attack into a Doomsday Device for two on Shawn, with Shane being stunned.

Shawn fights up and hits a double clothesline, allowing the hot tag to HHH. House is cleaned in a hurry and Shawn beats Shane up on the floor. Cue Umaga though and Shawn gets taken out, leaving the McMahons to beat on HHH. With Umaga ready to wreck DX even more, cue Kane to fight him to the back. HHH is down in the corner as Shane loads up Coast To Coast but Shawn is back up to superkick it out of the air. Sweet Chin Music into the Pedigree finishes Vince.

Rating: ;C-. It was another nicely done story with the execution lacking. As has been the case for the entire feud so far, DX never felt like they were in trouble. Having the army there helped a good bit and DX was at least down here, but we are reaching kind of a goofy point where you can only throw so many people before it stops mattering. An army of midcarders is a big update over the Spirit Squad though so it’s a step forward, but the match, again, wasn’t much to see.

A lot of celebrating ensues, with a trainer checking on Shawn.

We recap John Cena vs. Edge for Edge’s Raw World Title. Edge cashed in Money in the Bank to win the title at New Year’s Revolution but then Cena took it back at the Royal Rumble a few weeks later Then Rob Van Dam took the title and Edge got it back, with Cena giving chase. Edge slapped Cena’s father on Raw, so you know it’s personal.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Edge

Edge, with Lita, is defending and loses the title if he is disqualified. Cena wastes no time in shoving Edge hard into the corner to begin the destruction. The referee has to cut things off and Cena misses a charge into the post. That means Edge can hammer away and send Cena outside for a nine count. A spinwheel kick gives Edge two but Cena’s release fisherman’s suplex gets the same. Cena gets tossed over the top and out to the floor for a breather.

Back in and Cena misses a crossbody and we hit the chinlock. Cena eventually powers out so Edge boots him in the face for two. Edge heads up top and gets crotched, though he is fine enough to shove Cena down and score with a top rope clothesline for two. The camel clutch goes on until Cena fights up with a slam for the double knockdown. It’s Cena back up with the Throwback and it’s time to pick up the pace.

Lita throws in a chair because she forgot the rules but Cena gets rid of it just as fast. Cena fires off his clotheslines but Edge cuts him off for two. Cena’s victory roll gets two so Lita gets on the apron, only to get knocked down again. A double clothesline gives us a double knockdown until Edge is up with the Edge-O-Matic for two.

The spear is loaded up but Cena counters into the STFU. Edge grabs the rope, allowing Lita to slip him some brass knuckles. Cena doesn’t mind and loads up the FU, which draws Lita in. Again, that’s fine with Cena who puts them on his shoulders at the same time. Lita gets flipped down but Edge slips out and uses the knuckles to the back of the head to pin Cena and retain.

Rating: B. It’s the best match of the show, but that isn’t exactly clearing a high bar. They were starting to feel things at the end before the screwy finish but at least Edge got a pin instead of having Lita come in for the DQ. Cena was starting to have the Superman vibe here as he was fired up and unstoppable, which makes the ending seem a little more impressive. They did well here, though the mic work is still the high point of the feud.

Edge and Lita celebrate as Cena wakes up to stare down down and end the show.

Overall Rating: C. I’m not sure if it’s the lack of one match standing above the rest or the lack of anything really changing but I still don’t care for this show all that much. It also doesn’t help that nothing really jumps off the page as far as quality, leaving this to be a not exactly memorable show. This felt like they were gearing up for their next brand exclusive shows. That is a way to go, but then why should I want to watch this? The show does feel big, but nothing happens here and that leaves you with no real reason to watch it, which isn’t exactly what you expect from a show usually this important.

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Summerslam Count-Up – Summerslam 2005 (2020 Redo): He’s Here

Summerslam 2005
Date: August 21, 2005
Location: MCI Center, Washington DC.
Attendance: 18,156
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Tazz, Michael Cole, Jonathan Coachman

It’s a big show here with a card that doesn’t quite live up to the hype. We have a huge main event between Hulk Hogan and Shawn Michaels, but after that it’s kind of a downgrade with Rey Mysterio vs. Eddie Guerrero with a kid (symbolically) above the ring. The World Title matches see John Cena defending against Chris Jericho and JBL challenging Batista in a No Holds Barred match. Maybe they can make it work though so let’s get to it.

Lilian Garcia sings the Star Spangled Banner.

The opening video looks at the big matches, which works a bit better. Granted that might be because it’s set to Remedy by Seether and I always liked that song. Shawn vs. Hogan gets its own section of the video, because nothing on this show comes close to it (fair enough).

US Title: Chris Benoit vs. Orlando Jordan

Jordan is defending and it’s a German suplex into the Crossface to make Benoit champion in 25 seconds. Now THAT is how you wake a crowd up while giving Jordan exactly what he deserved in Honky Tonk Man style.

Vickie Guerrero comes in to see Eddie and asks him to calm down. This isn’t about Dominic because it’s all about Eddie not being able to beat Rey. Eddie wants someone to carry on the Guerrero legacy and Vickie talks about him having a heart of gold. But there’s also an evil inside of him that won’t leave Rey alone. Eddie: “So now you don’t think I can beat Rey?” Eddie throws her out and reassures himself that he’ll win.

We recap Matt Hardy vs. Edge. Lita left Matt for Edge while Matt was hurt and then he was released. Matt invaded Raw a few times to get at Edge but then he was rehired and it was just Matt Hardy again. Tonight is the big fight.

Matt Hardy vs. Edge

Hardy runs to the ring and starts the fight on the floor as it feels like Matt wants to kill him. They get inside with Matt hammering away and a loud HARDY chant. Matt grabs a rear naked choke but Edge gets to the ropes and then back outside. Back in and Edge hits a headbutt to put Matt on the ropes as the fans are all over Lita.

A spear through the ropes puts them back on the floor but Matt hammers away with right hands to the head. More right hands in the corner have Edge in trouble so he drops Matt face first onto the post to knock him silly. Even Lita looks concerned as Matt is busted open. Matt can barely stand so Edge kicks him in the head….and the referee stops it.

Rating: D+. So yeah Matt comes back, gets in a few shots, and then gets busted open for a referee stoppage in five minutes. The first minute or so felt like a war but then it was little more than a hard hitting match with one big spot. This is the kind of thing that needed to go about eighteen minutes with both of them bleeding, but that would suggest that Matt was something important, rather than just a way to get Edge over. I can go with that as Matt is Matt and Edge has been a near main eventer for a long time now, but this was a major disappointment after the setup.

We recap Eddie Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio. Eddie can’t beat Rey and has been driven completely crazy over jealousy and his failures. Therefore, Eddie is going to try something else so he brought up that Rey’s son Dominic was really Eddie’s biological son. Eddie wanted Dominic, but a social worker said they had to settle this, so a ladder match was made instead.

Rey Mysterio vs. Eddie Guerrero

Tony Chimel: “The following contest is a ladder match for the custody of Dominic!” And that’s your most ridiculous ring introduction of all time. Dominic and the social worker are in the front row so Eddie goes over to them for a rather evil smile. Rey comes out and hugs Dominic so Eddie goes over and shakes the social worker’s hand. We’re ready to go and Eddie talks a lot of trash as they stare each other down to start.

Eddie gets in a cheap shot to knock Rey into the corner but Rey monkey flips him out to the floor. A whip sends Rey into the ladder though and he has to springboard in with a dropkick to knock Eddie off. Eddie goes to get another ladder so Rey dropkicks that one into his face, followed by a springboard seated senton to the floor. Back in and Eddie saves Rey’s climb with a sunset bomb but he can’t hold on, making it look rather messy. Eh to be fair that’s a pretty tricky spot.

Eddie hits him in the ribs and face with the ladder before sandwiching Rey between some ladders. The fans know what’s coming and are rather pleased with the slingshot hilo onto a ladder onto Rey onto another ladder. Rey gets up and uses a ladder to bridge his way up top to cut Eddie off, including a backdrop onto the bridged ladder. The crash bangs up Rey’s knee so he climbs rather slowly, allowing Eddie to dropkick the ladder out and hurt the knee even more.

Eddie reverse powerbombs him ribs first into the ladder on the top rope and there’s that evil smile again. That’s enough for another climb but Dominic comes in to shake the ladder. That just annoys Eddie so he yells at Dominic and demands a hug. Eddie: “I’m your new daddy now!” Eddie goes to hit him but Rey makes the save as Dominic is back with the social worker who let him jump the barricade and interfere in a violent match.

Rey sends him into a ladder and then 619s said ladder into Eddie’s face, only to hurt the knee again. The knee is ok enough to Drop The Dime onto a ladder onto Eddie and then load up the ladder again. Eddie climbs up the same side for an electric chair but Rey shows him how to do the sunset bomb for the huge crash. Rey goes up again and grabs the case but Eddie kicks the ladder out and pulls Rey down into a big spinebuster.

With Rey pinned under the ladder, Eddie goes up but stops to talk a lot of trash. He can’t unhook the thing anyway, allowing Rey to wiggle free and kick the ladder over. Apparently Vickie was supposed to run in there and missed the cue, explaining why Eddie couldn’t understand how a hook worked. Eddie is back up with Three Amigos, including the third onto the ladder. That means another climb but this time Vickie comes out for the save as she shoves the ladder over. Vickie pulls Eddie back so Rey can climb p and win.

Rating: B. It’s rather good with some big crashes, but the Vickie/Dominic stuff was too much and brought the match down. Rey vs. Eddie is something you can watch all day, especially if Eddie is all evil, but they could have come up with something better than a ladder match for custody papers. It was too far and became dumb rather than dramatic, which defeats a lot of the purpose.

Post match Vickie is relieved and Rey hits Eddie with a briefcase for a bonus.

Chris Jericho doesn’t like John Cena’s theme music and promises to make him as forgettable as the New Kids On The Block. He beat the Rock and Steve Austin on the same night and Cena isn’t on their level.

Eugene vs. Kurt Angle

For Eugene’s (Or Angle’s?) Gold Medal with no time limit and Christy Hemme is here with Eugene. Angle goes off on him to start and stomps Eugene down into the corner. Eugene comes back with a Faarooq spinebuster but Angle breaks up the People’s Elbow attempt with a hard clothesline. The fans are very pleased with this as they don’t seem all that into Eugene here.

Angle rolls the German suplexes for two and the fans are happy again. Eugene gets sent into the buckle a few times so the comeback is on, including a Rock Bottom for two. The Stunner gets the same and Eugene takes down the non-existent straps. Angle reverses the ankle lock by rolling him into the corner though and it’s the Angle Slam into the ankle lock for the win.

Rating: D. This could have been on Raw as Eugene was completely overwhelmed. The charm is long past gone now and it’s just Eugene doing Austin and Rock moves with almost nothing in between. It was just a squash anyway as Eugene is treated like the glorified jobber that he is. Angle needs to move on to something else and Eugene needs to become something else entirely.

Post match Angle stands on a chair so he can be awarded the medal again.

The Divas, in swimsuits, wash a limo with the Presidential seal on the door. The window goes down to reveal Vince McMahon. Vince: “Hey, why not?” There’s a McMahon For President bumper sticker on the limo for a bonus.

Undertaker vs. Randy Orton

Rematch from Wrestlemania because Orton isn’t happy with his loss. It’s weird to see Undertaker come out first. Orton bails to the floor to start so Undertaker takes a second before shoving him down. A slap gets in Orton’s head a bit but he’s back up to dodge some right hands. Undertaker grabs a headlock (that’s a rare one) but Orton is right back with a hiptoss into a clothesline. That just earns him a big boot to the face and Orton is stunned in a hurry.

Undertaker goes technical with a keylock into Old School but Orton somehow understands what it means when Undertaker stands on the top while holding an arm. Old School is broken up with an armdrag back down but Undertaker LAUNCHES him into the corner to hammer away. The big boot and jumping clothesline give Undertaker two but the big boot in the corner only hits….well corner really and Orton grabs a DDT for his own two with Undertaker putting a foot across the rope.

Flashing back to his Evolution days, Orton cannonballs down onto the leg and then wraps it around the post. The leglock goes on so Undertaker punches his way to freedom, only to earn a knee drop to the ribs. Undertaker limps into the powerslam for two and it’s time to go to Texas with a spinning toehold.

That’s broken up as well and Undertaker starts kicking at Orton’s knee, earning a one off BORING chant. That doesn’t last long either as Orton is right back to the knee as the slow pace continues. Undertaker kicks him out to the floor for a ram into the steps and the apron legdrop as this isn’t exactly hitting a high gear. Old School connects back inside and it’s the Downward Spiral to Orton, who is right back with a dropkick for the double knockdown.

The RKO is blocked so they fight over a Tombstone until Orton gets two off the backbreaker. Orton goes up but Undertaker rolls through the high crossbody and grabs him by the throat. The chokeslam connects but a “fan” comes in. The distraction lets Orton hit the RKO for the fast pin.

Rating: C+. It was a struggle to get this high as there was no sense of urgency or any time until the end where either of them seemed close to going to a finish. At least the Wrestlemania match had an awesome near fall of the RKO but this was a bunch of leg work until they got to the finish. It could have worked if they had gone to a better ending but this never got into a higher gear.

And it’s Cowboy Bob Orton. You can book the rubber match already.

Some members of the Republican National Committee are here.

We recap Chris Jericho vs. John Cena. They’ve been having issues since Cena made his Raw debut on the Highlight Reel. Then they got in an argument over who was the bigger rock star, which turned into Cena’s Steve Austin vs. Eric Bischoff’s Vince McMahon with Jericho and Carlito as the chief lackeys. The former story was better but why do that when you can do the same thing you’ve done so many times before?

Bischoff wishes Jericho’s luck.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Chris Jericho

Cena is defending. They go nose to nose to start and a lockup doesn’t go anywhere. Jericho’s headlock is just as ineffective but he grabs a suplex to take over. There’s the spinwheel kick to drop Cena again but the springboard crossbody only lands on the floor. Back in and Cena hammers away, only to charge into a dropkick in the corner. A suplex gives Jericho two and a basement dropkick to the headsets up the chinlock.

They go outside with Jericho choking away with a cord but Cena is back with right hands. This isn’t exactly blowing the roof off the place so far. The big flying shoulder misses though and Jericho hits the running bulldog. Jericho has to bail out of the Lionsault so he tries the Walls, which is kicked out to the floor in a hurry. Cena drops the middle rope Fameasser over the ropes for two on the way back in but the FU is countered into a DDT for two. It’s time to start in on the back with a backbreaker and some elbows as the fans are loudly split.

The running crotch attack to the back only hits ropes though and they’re both down again. Cena is back up with that hard clothesline into the ProtoBomb. The Shuffle is countered into the Walls in the middle though, sending Cena on the long crawl to the ropes. Jericho pulls him back in but Cena makes the rope on the second attempt to a rather loud reaction. Cena’s back is good enough to try a super AA but Jericho slips out and grabs another suplex for another two. An argument with the referee lets Cena grab the FU to retain.

Rating: B. This took some time to get going but they drew the crowd into it and it turned into a heck of a match by the end. Cena is showing some signs of brilliance in these big matches and Jericho has more than shown that he can hang with anyone so this was a benefit to both of them. Good match here as Cena is becoming a bigger and bigger star every single week.

We recap JBL vs. Batista (hometown boy) for the Smackdown World Title. JBL beat him by DQ last month so now it’s No Holds Barred. Not much more to it than that as JBL isn’t quite the believable challenger.

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

Batista is defending and it’s No Holds Barred. We get the JBL dollars raining from the ceiling during JBL’s entrance. The fight starts at the entrance with Batista ramming him into various things. A fire extinguisher into the face drops Batista though and JBL punches him around the barricade, only to have Batista spear him through said barricade.

They get inside for the first time with JBL kicking him in the head, followed by some whipping with a belt. Back up and Batista charges into a boot in the corner, setting up the Clothesline From JBL for two. JBL slides in the steps and this isn’t going to end well. The powerbomb off the steps is countered into a backdrop off of them and Batista hits the spinebuster. There’s the Batista Bomb but Batista doesn’t cover. Another Batista Bomb onto the steps retains the title.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t much but it was way better than their previous match as it didn’t go on forever, though the stipulation wasn’t exactly used. They went with the definitive ending here as Batista completely beat him, which is all it should have been. JBL was never a threat to Batista and now they can both move on to something else, with both of them going in the proper direction.

We recap Shawn Michaels vs. Hulk Hogan. They teamed a handful of times and then Shawn superkicked him on the Fourth of July. Shawn said he had to know and the match was made. Everything went spiraling out of control after that though, with Shawn turning it into a weird near shoot on Hogan’s career while Hogan just referenced Bret Hart and screwjobs a few times. Shawn has carried this feud on his back and it’s going to be interesting to see how they get to the big boot and legdrop.

Hulk Hogan vs. Shawn Michaels

Hogan has the big flag out for the entrance. It’s a long staredown to start before Hogan shoves him away and shows off the biceps. Hogan shoves him down a few more times and Shawn is already frustrated. A headlock works a bit better for Shawn until a shoulder sends him into a backflip through the ropes as the overselling is already strong. Back in and Shawn knees him in the ribs but gets put on top so Hogan can kick him in the ribs.

Shawn bounces as high into the air as he can for a crotching, before a ram into the buckle gives us a bump that Mr. Perfect would think is too much. A clothesline puts Shawn on the floor where he rolls backwards again, gets up and falls back down. Shawn manages a kick to the face though and starts chopping away in the corner. The slap to the face does not go well so Shawn does it again before chopping even more. A third slap earns Shawn a right hand out to the floor but they both get posted with Hogan staggering around a lot.

Shawn posts him again but still can’t put Hogan down so it’s time for some left hands to the head. Some right hands in the corner get Shawn shoved down again (make it twice), only to have him finally punch Hogan down (you don’t see that too often). Hogan is finally busted open and Shawn grabs the sleeper to follow the Randy Savage formula from Wrestlemania V. Shawn’s arm is covered in blood as Hogan suplexes his way to freedom.

The forearm into the nipup lets Shawn drop the elbow (OH YEAH indeed) but this one misses (leave it to Savage kid). Hogan slugs away but Shawn tries another forearm, which takes out the referee. The fans want Bret (fair enough after the promos building this up) but Shawn is up first and heads to the top, only to come back down for a terrible Sharpshooter (even Rock’s is better than that).

Another referee comes in and Hogan very slowly makes it to the rope. Hogan kicks him into the second referee and everyone is down again. A low blow drops Hogan and a chair to the head finally lets Shawn hit the elbow. Sweet Chin Music connects for two but Hogan kicks out, Hulks Up, punches away and finishes with the big boot and legdrop. So that’s how they got there.

Rating: B-. The match was a weird one (YOU THINK?) as Shawn was doing his over the top selling and turning it into a joke at first but then it settled into a match with a pretty simple formula that hit the high points but didn’t exactly break the mold. Hogan was the definitive winner here and Shawn hit everything he could without being able to finish Hogan off. I liked it well enough and it’s certainly a dream match, but it’s two matches in one and that’s a little distracting.

Post match Hogan poses but Shawn stops him to make everything nice. Shawn says he had to know and, as usual, wrestlers are rather forgiving about the whole situation. It’s more posing to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This show was all over the place with some good wrestling and action but a lot of things that felt like they should have been so much more. It’s an enjoyable show and something I’d watch again down the line, but it felt like they were going for a stacked show and as it is, it’s just pretty good. Fix some of the bigger holes and it’s a great one, but I’ll take what I can get after a build that wasn’t their best work.

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Summerslam Count-Up – Summerslam 1991 (2013 Redo): Wedding Day Chairs

Summerslam 1991
Date: August 26, 1991
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 20,000
Commentators: Bobby Heenan, Roddy Piper, Gorilla Monsoon

We get the regular intro with the theme of a match made in Heaven and a match made in Hell.

Ricky Steamboat/British Bulldog/Texas Tornado vs. Warlord/Power and Glory

Steamboat is just The Dragon here, complete with what looks like a lizard man costume and breathing fire. The heels get the jobber entrance and have Slick with them. Steamboat and Roma get things going as Gorilla is listing off the rest of the card. Roma slams him down and mostly misses a dropkick before posing. Paul goes to the middle rope but dives into the armdrag and Steamboat cranks on the arm even more. Ricky hits a much better dropkick to put Roma in the corner for a tag to Hercules who gets caught in some armdrags of his own.

Rating: C+. Nothing wrong with this as it was a basic six man tag to fire up the crowd. Everyone looked fine and the crowd was WAY into the smark god known as Ricky Steamboat. The heels were all about to be gone from the company with only Warlord making it to 1992.

Sean Mooney says to call some hotline to hear prerecorded comments from Liz and Savage!

Intercontinental Title: Mr. Perfect vs. Bret Hart

Bret tries to get up but is knocked off the apron and right on top of a production guy who has a very confused look on his face. Back in and Bret jumps over Perfect in the corner and gets two off a rollup. The fans are WAY into this so far. Perfect sends Bret chest first into the buckle to take over again as Heenan is starting to lose his marbles. Another hard whip into the buckle gets two for the champion followed by the Hennig neck snap for two more.

Bret celebrates with his parents.

The Bushwhackers are ready for the Natural Disasters and Andre is ready for Earthquake, the man who broke his leg a few weeks back.

Natural Disasters vs. Bushwhackers

Andre looks terrible here and would be dead in less than 18 months. The Whackers sneak up on the big men on the floor and poke them in the eyes. We finally start with Butch vs. Typhoon and the big man being bitten on the trunks. Earthquake tries to come in but splashes his own partner by mistake. A double clothesline puts Quake down and the Bushwhackers are in full control.

Million Dollar Title: Ted DiBiase vs. Virgil

Rating: D. Actually hang on a minute.

The Mountie is ready for his Jailhouse Match with Boss Man. We get a clip of him shocking a handcuffed Boss Man from a few weeks ago. Moutnie insults the New York cops who take the loser to jail later tonight.

Boss Man says Mountie is going to jail tonight.

Mountie vs. Big Boss Man

Mountie is dragged away by cops.

The Natural Disasters are going to eat the Legion of Doom for dinner.

Savage is nervous for the wedding.

Mountie is tricked into having his picture taken.

Sgt. Slaughter and his cronies are excited about having a 3-2 advantage. Slaughter says he might have a surprise for later.

Tag Titles: Nasty Boys vs. Legion of Doom

The Nasties are defending and this is No Countout/No DQ, making it a street fight in modern terms. The champions are sent to the floor and the fight is on early. Back in the ring Animal hits a quick powerbomb on Knobbs for two followed by Hawk enziguring Sags down. We get down to the stupid tagging part of the street fight with Sags sending Hawk to the floor and hitting him with a bucket of water.

The Mountie is put in a cell by some VERY sweaty policemen.

I.R.S. vs. Greg Valentine

The tax guy heads in again and puts on an abdominal stretch followed by a jumping clothesline for no cover. Off to a chinlock before IRS misses a knee into the corner, giving Greg the opening on the leg. The Figure Four is quickly broken by a grab of the ropes and a second attempt at the hold is countered into a small package for the pin by IRS.

Hogan and Warrior talk about their victims in the main event.

Ultimate Warrior/Hulk Hogan vs. Sgt. Slaughter/Colonel Mustafa/General Adnan

Hogan and Sid pose for a long time post match.

Mountie is in jail and a fat biker hits on him.

Hogan and Sid are STILL posing.

We get the video of Savage proposing to Liz and her responding with an OH YEAH. We also get a four minute music video highlighting their entire history together to a sappy love song.

With the show in the arena done we go to the reception with Savage telling Heenan to beat it. Gene Okerlund does the ceremonial toast. They have the first dance and everything seems to be fine. Now we eat cake before heading over to the gift table where things get interesting.

Ratings Comparison

British Bulldog/Ricky Steamboat/Texas Tornado vs. Warlord/Power and Glory

Original: D

Redo: C+

Bret Hart vs. Mr. Perfect

Original: A+

Redo: A

Natural Disasters vs. Bushwhackers

Original: C-

Redo: D-

Virgil vs. Ted DiBiase

Original: B

Redo: D+

Big Bossman vs. The Mountie

Original: D

Redo: D+

Legion of Doom vs. Nasty Boys

Original: D

Redo: D

Irwin R. Schyster vs. Greg Valentine

Original: D+

Redo: D

Hulk Hogan/Ultimate Warrior vs. Sgt. Slaughter/Colonel Mustafa/General Adnan

Original: D

Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: D

Redo: C-

Dang this show ticked me off the first time.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/07/25/history-of-summerslam-count-up-1991-a-wedding-that-goes-badly-what-a-new-concept/

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Summerslam Count-Up – 1990 (2022 Redo): Sweet, Sweet Nostalgia

Summerslam 1990
Date: August 27, 1990
Location: Philadelphia Spectrum, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 19,304
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Roddy Piper

This is the requested redo for the year and I’m rather happy about that. I watched this show more times than I can count as a kid as it was the first wrestling show I had on video. I’ve seen it so many times that I can probably quote at least a bit of the commentary from every match and know most of the matches by heart so looking back at it should be fun. It’s a double main event as Hulk Hogan returns to face Earthquake and Ultimate Warrior defends the WWF Title against Rick Rude in a cage. Let’s get to it.

The opening video hypes up the show, including the main events. This gives us the classic 80s Vince McMahon hype voice and that is always going to work. At the end of the day, the guy is a promoter and a really good one.

Rockers vs. Power And Glory

Vince promises this this is going to be a HUMDINGER so you know he’s serious. Shawn comes to the ring so gingerly that you would think he had a bad knee and wasn’t ready to go here or something. Power And Glory, already in the ring, (it was a different time) jump Michaels before the bell and hit him in the knee with the chain to give him a reason to be down. Why is that so much to ask?

Roma hammers on Jannetty to start but Marty fights back with armdrags and dropkick (why yes, he is a face in a tag team). Slick (the evil, yet stylish) manager offers a distraction as Piper wants to know which one is the power and which is the glory. You mean him being named HERCULES isn’t a hint? Jannetty gets beaten down as Piper talks about Mick Jagger and David Bowie, perhaps missing the idea of the Rockers.

We pause to take out Michaels again as this continues to be a handicap, including a gorilla press to Jannetty. A small package doesn’t get Jannetty out of trouble as Roma comes back in and hits some backbreakers. Jannetty powerslams his way to freedom and hits the top rope fist drop (such a simple yet good looking finisher) with Hercules having to make a save. That’s finally enough as the PowerPlex puts Jannetty away at 5:59.

Rating: C. Kind of a weird way to start the show here but I do like the idea of just getting in and out without trying to do anything nuts. Power And Glory weren’t some great team but they could beat Marty in a handicap match. That’s all you had here and it went well enough, even if it was pretty clear that Shawn shouldn’t have been out there in the first place.

Post match Shawn gets in the ring and the big beatdown is on, with Marty trying to cover Shawn’s knee (another Jagger/Bowie reference from Piper). Of note: the VHS that I remember glitched at this point so I didn’t remember seeing the last minute and a half of the match until I was almost twenty years old. Shawn does a stretcher job and would be out of action for about a month and a half.

Mr. Perfect isn’t worried about facing the Texas Tornado on less than ten days’ notice, even if he knows almost nothing about Tornado. Bobby Heenan talks about how worthless Texas tornadoes are because you can see them coming a mile away. Then Perfect gets REALLY serious and says no one beats him.

The Texas Tornado promises to come out of the clouds and be powerful, unpredictable and devastating. Then he’ll go back into the clouds with the Intercontinental Title. For some reason, that one has always stuck with me, even if it isn’t very good.

Intercontinental Title: Mr. Perfect vs. Texas Tornado

Perfect, with Bobby Heenan, is defending. Of note: Tornado was in yellow trunks for the interview and is in white here so he doesn’t match Perfect’s yellow and blue singlet. The lockup goes to Tornado, who shoves him into the corner without much trouble. That’s enough to send Perfect outside, as commentary thinks they might be surprised by the strength. So they haven’t even looked at Tornado?

Back in and they circle each other a bit as Piper wants to know what Heenan knows about wrestling. A hard whip into the corner sets up a slam on Perfect and a clothesline puts him on the floor, with the required big bump from Perfect. Back in again and Perfect slugs his way out of a wristlock, setting up a sleeper. Some shots to the face in the corner don’t do much to Tornado, who catapults Perfect into the post and grabs the Claw. The Tornado Punch (HUGE bump from Perfect) connects for the pin and the title at 5:15.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t much of a match as Tornado was a bit all over the place (shocking) and a lot of the stuff was rather basic. That being said, this was all about the surprise factor as Tornado gets the title almost immediately after debuting. Of note: for someone perfect, Perfect lost every pay per view match he had in 1990, though finishing as runner up in the Royal Rumble could have been worse.

Perfect staggers out of the arena in even more great selling.

In the back, Gene Okerlund can’t find Sweet Sapphire (uh oh) but Heenan and Perfect come in to rant about the bad refereeing. Tornado CHEATED by sending him into the post and now it’s time to pay. Well not now but in the near future, though that might qualify as semantics.

Sweet Sapphire vs. Sensational Queen Sherri

Sherri has a huge mask on which absolutely TERRIFIED me as a kid. And there’s no Sapphire, despite the music playing multiple times. That’s going to be a thirty second countdown forfeit and no match. Granted the fact that Sherri was in a full length dress makes me wonder what she was exactly planning for this one anyway. Commentary is very confused by Sapphire’s whereabouts.

Dusty Rhodes is in the back and says he doesn’t know where Sapphire is either as she disappeared ten minutes after they arrived. No one has seen her and he is rather worried. Cue Jim Duggan for a rather random cameo, saying everyone is still looking for Sapphire. With Duggan gone, Dusty says that Sapphire is getting a lot of really expensive gifts but that isn’t his business. GEE, I WONDER WHO IN THE WWF IS RICH ENOUGH TO SEND HER THOSE PRESENTS!

Tito Santana vs. Warlord

Slick is here with Warlord and Piper promises to not make a bunch of taco jokes about Santana. A headlock doesn’t work for Santana to start but a dropkick manages to put Warlord down. Back up and Santana looks to load up a hurricanrana (not quite in 1990) so he can hammer away to knock Warlord outside.

That’s fine with Warlord, who drives him back first into the post, allowing Slick to stalk him with a shoe (yes a shoe). The slow forearms keep Santana down until he gets a boot up in the corner to slow Warlord down. The flying forearm rocks Warlord but he gets the foot on the rope at the last minute. Warlord blocks a monkey flip out of the corner though and a running powerslam finishes at 5:28.

Rating: C. This is a fine example of a power vs. speed match and Santana knows how to do that as well as anyone else from this era. Let Santana go out there and run around while Warlord uses his power game in short spurts. It is a formula that has worked forever and it worked well enough here, even in a short form match.

Survivor Series is coming. That’s the Undertaker debut show, which always blows my mind. Look at this card and consider that three months later, you would have someone who has faced Rusev and AJ Styles.

Demolition, all three of them, won’t say which two of them will be facing the Hart Foundation. Hint: it’s probably the two holding the belts here. Either way, they aren’t worried about facing the Legion of Doom after this, because they’re just a bunch of impostors. This was just after Crush was added to the team so Ax could be written out due to what was thought to be a heart problem. In reality it was a bad allergic reaction to some kind of shellfish (not a joke) and he was fine soon enough.

Tag Team Titles: Hart Foundation vs. Demolition

Demolition (Crush/Smash) are defending in a 2/3 falls match and we cut to the back where the Harts say they’re a bit surprised. They promise to win the titles because they are two Harts beating as one (always loved that line). Bret and Smash start but Neidhart comes in to knock an interfering Crush outside. Smash gets taken down into an armbar but knocks him away without much trouble, allowing Crush to come in instead.

Crush pulls a crossbody out of the air and slams Bret down but charges into a boot in the corner. It’s off to Neidhart vs. Smash, with the former getting kicked in the back by Crush (that cheater). A clothesline out of the corner gives Neidhart a breather and he hands it back to Bret, which seems rather quick after Bret took a good bit longer beating.

Everything breaks down and Demolition is sent into each other so Crush falls outside. The backbreaker and middle rope elbow get two on Smash, with Crush dropping a leg for the save. With Neidhart down on the floor, the Demolition Decapitator finishes Bret for the first fall at 6:19.

Bret and Crush start the second fall and a choke shove drops Bret fast. The neck crank goes on for a bit but Bret is back up with the Hart Attack clothesline (minus the whole Hart Attack thing). The hot tag bring in Neidhart (despite Crush holding Bret’s leg) for the house cleaning on Smash. There’s the powerslam for two and everything breaks down with the Hart Attack hitting Smash.

Crush DIVES over and grabs the referee, who he carries around the ring. Believe it or not, yes that is a DQ and we’re died up at 10:40 (total). Why in the world wouldn’t you just break up the cover there? That doesn’t exactly make Crush look smart but Demolition was never the brightest team.

The third fall begins so here is Ax to hide underneath the ring like a villain should. Bret comes back with a sunset flip on Smash, followed by Neidhart powerslamming Bret onto him (that was awesome) for two. Then we get to the “REALLY?” part of the match as Ax switches with Smash (ignore the referee WATCHING HIM COME OUT FROM UNDER THE RING) and starts hammering away. Even when I was three years old, I never got how this was supposed to make sense (Smash’s face paint was even wiped off and Ax’s was fresh).

Smash comes back out to double team Bret but cue the Legion of Doom to pull Ax from under the ring and break up another Demolition Decapitator. Neidhart slingshot shoulder blocks Crush into a cradle from Bret for the pin and the titles at 15:50 in one of the all time great feel good moments.

Rating: B+. A lot of this is nostalgia but I LOVE this match and always have. What I didn’t get when I was a kid was that this was the culmination of a years long quest for the Harts to get the titles back and prove that they could do it without Jimmy Hart. The win felt like it meant something (Vince’s call is perfect as you can feel him get happy on saying THREE) and it still holds up to this day. Heck of a match, but this was more about the emotion and it worked great.

Wrestlemania VII ad. I can still remember the phone number.

The Legion of Doom is happy because they have been waiting on Demolition. What a rush….for them. The Harts come in and say they’ll fight anyone anytime anywhere no matter the odds. Quite the emotional burst there.

Sean Mooney is outside of Demolition’s locker room where you can hear them ranting and raving about the Legion of Doom.

Queen Sherri brags about her win over Sapphire and laughs off the idea that there were “early sightings” of her earlier today. Sherri: “WHAT IS SHE: A UFO???” On top of that, Sherri has heard rumors about Sapphire that makes her think Sapphire might be the smartest person around here. Sherri: “THIS IS TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE!!!”

Five minute intermission, thankfully without the countdown graphic included.

Gene Okerlund runs down the rest of the card and we see one of Bad News Browns’ Harlem sewer rats.

Damien, Jake Roberts’ snake, is in the shower.

Big Boss Man, who is guest referee for Brown vs. Roberts for no explained reason, doesn’t mind snakes or rats.

Nikolai Volkoff, now very pro-America, is glad to be in a tag team with Jim Duggan. Volkoff describes Duggan as his idol and calls the team the American Express (as opposed to the Orient Express you see).

Earthquake, with Dino Bravo and Jimmy Hart, is ready to crush Hulk Hogan for good, just like he did to Tugboat. He might as well crush Big Boss Man as well! Bravo promises to take care of the Boss Man while Hart promises a double stretcher job. Earthquake also brings up Tugboat asking fans to send Hogan cards and letters to make him feel better.

1. That was designed to replenish the WWF’s mailing list.

2. Each fan reportedly got a note signed (well, “signed” but close enough) by Hogan thanking them for their prayers.

3. That’s brilliant, and it’s the same thing the WWF did when the Islanders dognapped Matilda a few years earlier.

Jake Roberts is ready to turn Bad News Brown into a mouse.

A good chunk of these promos were not on the home video, likely for time.

Jake Roberts vs. Bad News Brown

Big Boss Man is guest referee and the fight starts before he gets to the ring. Jake tries a very early DDT but Brown slips out and kicks Jake down. Another DDT attempt doesn’t work and they head outside, where Brown hits him in the ribs with a chair. That’s good for a warning from Boss Man and Brown stomps away back inside. Roberts fights back with the snap jabs and the fans are already wanting the DDT. Brown counters it a third time, which Piper attributed to an oily head. More pounding on the floor ensues and that’s enough to get Brown disqualified at 4:48.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here as it felt like a match they advertised and then forgot to do anything which, which didn’t make it much better. Throw in the Boss Man as the tacked on referee and there was only so much to get out of something like this. It just wasn’t very good and I’m not sure what they thought they had here.

Post match Brown goes to drop a leg on Damien but Boss Man makes the save. Brown beats on Boss Man but Jake grabs Damien and clears the ring, sending Brown out of the WWF for good. The rats were never seen, save for a closed crate at ringside.

Demolition rants about the numbers game in their match and swears vengeance, first on the Legion of Doom and then on the Harts.

It’s time for Brother Love, who scared the heck out of me when I was a kid (and in modern times, scares me for entirely different reasons). Love asks if kids remember being told what to do when they were younger. Now they still need someone to do that because they are soft and weak. His guest is the man who can tell you what to do so here is Sgt. Slaughter. Er, make that DRILL Sgt. Slaughter this time.

Slaughter has been looking around and wants to find a great American. That’s what he has found here, which is why he has The Great American Award for Brother Love. That makes him think of Nikolai Volkoff, who suddenly loves America. Slaughter isn’t happy with that and declares war on Volkoff, because America has gone soft. If Saddam Hussein (or “who’s on” as Slaughter pronounces it) declared war on us tomorrow our boys would be destroyed. Saluting ensues, as we have a new top heel.

Mr. Fuji and the Orient Express are ready for their match but we cut to Gene Okerlund, who has found Sapphire….who goes into a room and locks the door behind her. Nice one Gene.

Orient Express vs. Jim Duggan/Nikolai Volkoff

Piper doesn’t quite buy the idea of Duggan and Volkoff being that bright. Before the match, Duggan and Volkoff belt out God Bless America, because of course they do. Duggan says God bless the troops and the Express attacks, only to be knocked outside without much trouble. The villains come back in with Tanaka bouncing off of Volkoff (Piper: “Yep, real dumb.”). The US chants are on as Volkoff shrugs off a shot to the throat and brings Duggan in to clean house. Everything breaks down and the Express is sent into each other, setting up the three point clothesline to finish Tanaka at 3:22.

Rating: D+. This was little more than a debut squash for Duggan and Volkoff and that is fine, though seeing the Express lose so quickly despite having some awesome matches with the Rockers was a little weird. It wasn’t bad for a match there to play off of current events but it was fine for a quick one. As long as the WWF doesn’t think Duggan and Volkoff are a big deal, it doesn’t mean much.

Dusty Rhodes can’t get into Sapphire’s dressing room and has to go to the ring for his match. He’ll be back.

Sean Mooney, standing on a ladder, talks to Randy Savage, who thinks the rumors about Sapphire are true. Savage talks about how the Founding Fathers weren’t thinking about people like Dusty when they talked about the American Dream and this is a grave situation. Speaking of graves, the ring is where Macho is going to bury Dusty so DOWN THAT AISLE! Savage was kind of feeling it here.

Dusty Rhodes vs. Randy Savage

This is Macho King (with Queen Sherri) and Dusty is as serious as he has been in his WWF run. Hold on though as here is Ted DiBiase (with Virgil) on the platform to say his money can buy anyone or anything. He brings out Sapphire with a bag full of money (the trip around the world and the Cadillac seem more valuable, though I’d love one of those WWF gym bags) and talks about how money will get you whatever you want.

Dusty goes after them but Savage jumps him from behind. They head inside and the fight is on, with Dusty getting in some shots of his own. Savage is knocked outside and hides behind Sherri, who sneaks him the loaded purse. One shot is enough to knock Dusty cold for the pin at 2:14.

In the back, Ted DiBiase, Virgil and Sapphire leave in the limousine, with Dusty Rhodes giving chase to no avail. That always made me sad as it was a rare instance of evil flat out winning and Dusty not being able to do anything about it.

Hulk Hogan and the Big Boss Man are ready for revenge on Earthquake. They dedicate the match to Tugboat and quite the beating that goes with the match.

Earthquake vs. Hulk Hogan

Jimmy Hart, Dino Bravo and Big Boss Man are here too and make no mistake about it: this is the show’s real main event. Feeling out process to start and we get the big shove off out of the lockup. That does not great for Hogan and far better for Earthquake, with Hogan dropping backwards. After a quick chat with Boss Man on the floor, Hogan slugs away and tries a slam, only to hurt his back (it worked in the Andre match).

Some right hands and chops stagger Earthquake (and drop Bravo/Hart) until a big right hand puts Earthquake down. Everyone heads outside where the seconds get involved, including going inside. A double big boot drops Bravo and another one knocks Earthquake into the ropes as Piper wonders what the referee is thinking. The referee gets Boss Man out so Bravo and Earthquake can hit a double slam on Hogan.

The big elbow gives Earthquake two and we hit a Boston crab, which is quite the visual. Hogan tries to power out but for once gets smart and grabs the rope right next to him (you could tell things were different in 1990, as Hogan using a ROPE to escape is just hard to fathom). Bravo gets in a slam on the floor but Earthquake misses another big elbow. The slam still doesn’t work for Hogan as Earthquake crashes onto him for two more to bang up the ribs even more.

We hit the bearhug (required) but Hogan fights out and tries…..a crossbody???? What the heck man? Either way, Earthquake powerslams him down and hits the Earthquake. Then he does it again and I think you know what that means. The comeback is on, complete with the slam working this time. There’s the legdrop but Bravo offers a distraction and Hart comes in to jump Hogan. Everything breaks down and it heads to the floor, where Hogan slams Earthquake onto (not through) a table and that’s enough for the count at 13:12. Hogan jumping up and down in celebration always looked weird.

Rating: C+. I love Hogan but the magic was starting to fade. You can tell that there is a lot going on here to try to keep the energy up, but Hogan just isn’t as special as he once was. At the same time, the countout was lame and while Hogan slammed him, it was hardly some big win. They build Earthquake up very well, but there is only so much that can be done when he’s Hogan’s rebound feud.

Post match the beatdown is on with Earthquake choking Hogan. Boss Man hits Earthquake in the back with a metal stool and just annoys him, allowing Bravo to come in as well. In a great visual, Boss Man whips out the nightstick and is ready to go, which is enough for Earthquake and Bravo to bail. Hogan poses (after suggesting that Earthquake is a chicken) but Piper doesn’t think Hogan won anything with the countout. Two things.

1. Piper getting on Hogan just feels right.

2. I know it’s for the house show rematches, but dang that countout always felt kind of lame.

Rick Rude, now short haired and serious, promise to win the WWF Title in the cage tonight and get his statue outside of the Spectrum next to Rocky Balboa. Bobby Heenan explains the idea of a cage match and promises no sequels. Rude: “And there ain’t gonna be no rematch!” I didn’t know that was a Rocky reference until YEARS later. Of note: Heenan started this promo by saying “he’s going to get that Intercontinental Title back”, which is the kind of thing that he would be saying because he could do more than one thing at a time.

Dusty Rhodes is fine with Sapphire taking the money because he offered up his innocence to her and she paid him back in scorn (he used that line a lot in his career and I’m still not sure I get what it means). Now the fans are asking when he’s going to get mad and even. He’s coming for Ted DiBiase because….America can give him shelter from the storm? Ok then.

Lord Alfred Hayes explains how the cage is built for the main event.

Hulk Hogan talks about how there are new buildings being built around the world and they are all earthquake proof. Hogan is going to take that big fat dude (his words) around the world and beat him over and over until he is the #1 contender. That’s not how you usually become #1 contender. Anyway, Hogan has a fourth demandment: believe in yourself. For now though, he going to get a new nine foot surfboard (or gun as he calls it) and go to the beach to chase sharks, at least until he finds that TITLE wave. Then he pretends he’s on a motorcycle and rides backwards out of frame. Hogan was a weird dude.

With welts on his back, Earthquake promises that it isn’t over with Hulk Hogan and promises more pain next time. Dino Bravo and Jimmy Hart rant a lot too.

Ultimate Warrior: “Do you know what Bobby Heenan has in common with the Liberty Bell? One is cracked and the other is a ding dong.” Would that be Ding or Dong? A lot of Founding Father references are made with Warrior promising to beat Rick Rude. The idea of the match is that Rude beat Warrior back at Wrestlemania V (which is never mentioned by name) so he could do it again here. In short, it didn’t work and this is a really lame main event as a result.

WWF Title: Rick Rude vs. Ultimate Warrior

Rude is challenging in a cage and they start fighting on top of the cage. Warrior knocks him down and hits a top rope ax handle to take over, setting up the ram into the cage. Another ram into the cage drops Warrior and Rude goes up, where he has to kick Warrior away. For some reason Rude comes back down and keeps stomping away but it’s too early for the Rude Awakening.

Warrior knocks him down but the splash hits knees, allowing Rude to hit the Rude Awakening. For no adequately explained reason, Rude goes up to the top of the cage for a right hand to the head. He STILL won’t cover so he goes up again (Heenan: “WHERE ARE YOU GOING???”) and gets punched out of the air this time.

Warrior goes for the door and gets it slammed on his head for two, as this just keeps going. Rude goes for the door as well but gets pulled back in, with the tights coming down in the process. This time Warrior pulls Heenan in and knocks him down, followed by an atomic drop out the door. Some clotheslines into the gorilla press lets Warrior escape (complete with hip swivel) to retain at 10:01.

Rating: D+. Not only was it a completely nothing match, but it was a match that didn’t stick around for very long. In this case that might be a good thing though, as Rude was a lame duck of a challenger as you could have. There was no one for Warrior to face and it showed badly, making this a pretty weak main event. It might have worked as a quick house show main event, but (allegedly) headlining Summerslam? Not quite.

Warrior celebrates to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. Nostalgia plays a big role in this one but it’s actually a rather good show. They keep things moving and important things take place, including Hogan’s return and two title changes. It’s still the very tail end of the Golden Era and now things can move forward into the new era. It’s not a classic show, but it is a lot of fun and certainly memorable (at least for me), which is something I’ll take every time.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Summerslam Count-Up – Summerslam 1989 (2013 Redo): The 80s Were Fun

Summerslam 1989
Date: August 28, 1989
Location: Meadowlands Arena, East Rutherford, New Jersey
Attendance: 20,000
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Jesse Ventura

We get an intro video similar to the opening of a regular TV show with various highlights and people enjoying the warm weather.

Hart Foundation vs. Brain Busters

Anvil completely no sells some chops to the chest and sends Tully into the buckle before bringing Bret back in. The fans are all over Heenan with a Weasel chant while Bret works on a hammerlock. Tully grabs a top wristlock but Bret bridges off the mat to escape and the Busters are sent to the outside. Back in and Bret wins a slugout with Tully but gets suckered into a chase with Blanchard making a blind tag to Arn who blasts Bret from behind.

Dusty Rhodes talks about how the man in the blue suede shoes told him he can dance better than the Honky Tonk Man. This is a bit of a step down from Hard Times.

Honky Tonk Man vs. Dusty Rhodes

Rating: D-. Who in the world thought this deserved ten minutes should be carried into the street and shot. Between the leg lock and the WAY too long chinlock, this could have been cut in half and nothing would have been lost. Honky was fine as a jobber to the stars at this point and he would maintain that position for months to come. This was way overbooked for what it was worth, but the fans loved Dusty which is the point of the match.

Honky asks someone to help him find the stage and wants to know where Priscilla is.

Demolition and King Hacksaw Jim Duggan are ready for their six man tag against the Twin Towers (Boss Man/Akeem) and Andre the Giant.

Mr. Perfect vs. Red Rooster

Survivor Series is coming.

The Rockers/Tito Santana vs. Fabulous Rougeau Brothers/Rick Martel

This should be awesome. Martel teases getting in there against Tito to start but sends Jacques in instead. As is his custom, Jacques requests a handshake but sneaks in some choking on Tito instead. The Rockers come in without tags and the good guys hit stereo dropkicks to send the French Canadians to the floor. Things settle down to Marty vs. Jacques with the latter going to the middle rope and head faking Marty, but Jannetty is faking the head fake and punches Jacques on the way down.

Martel tries to hide in the corner but gets caught in a huge backdrop to send him running even further. A dropkick and a suplex put Martel down and the top rope right hand gets two as everything breaks down. Tito hits the flying forearm to send Martel to the floor and Marty rolls up Jacques, only to have Martel slide back in and blast Jannetty with a right hand, giving Jacques the pin.

We recap Rude vs. Warrior. Rude attacked Warrior during a posedown at the Rumble before stealing the IC Title at Wrestlemania with help from Heenan. Tonight is the rematch with rude defending against a ticked off Warrior after Warrior spent months fighting through the Heenan Family. This was also used to set up Warrior vs. Andre the Giant over the winter.

Intercontinental Title: Ultimate Warrior vs. Rick Rude

Roddy Piper laughs about costing Rude the title, setting up his first feud after returning to the ring.

We go to an intermission, which is just a graphic with a countdown clock until the show continues.

Twin Towers/Andre the Giant vs. Demolition/Jim Duggan

Greg Valentine vs. Hercules

Post match Garvin announces Hercules as the winner, which apparently is good enough to get Valentine disqualified. Like I said, this is the time to turn your brain off.

Randy Savage, Zeus and Sister Sherri gather round a cauldron and predict bad futures for Hogan, Beefcake and Liz. The late 80s were weird in case you were wondering.

Ted DiBiase vs. Jimmy Snuka

A quick stun gun sends Snuka into the top rope and Ted can stomp away like a good 80s heel. DiBiase works on the back with knees to the spine and a backbreaker for no cover but a middle rope elbow misses. Jimmy slams Ted down and hits a middle rope headbutt but Virgil breaks up the Superfly Splash. Snuka chases him around on the floor but gets sent into the post by DiBiase for the countout.

Post match Snuka hits the Superfly on Virgil.

Genius recites a poem about Summerslam, saying he thinks Zeus and Savage (his real brother) will win.

Zeus/Randy Savage vs. Brutus Beefcake/Hulk Hogan

Ratings Comparison

Hart Foundation vs. Brain Busters

Original: B+

Redo: B

Honky Tonk Man vs. Dusty Rhodes

Original: F

Redo: D-

Mr. Perfect vs. Red Rooster

Original: C+

Redo: D

Rick Martel/Fabulous Rougeaus vs. Tito Santana/Rockers

Original: B+

Redo: B

Ultimate Warrior vs. Rick Rude

Original: A-

Redo: B

Jim Duggan/Demolition vs. Andre the Giant/Twin Towers

Original: C+

Redo: C

Hercules vs. Greg Valentine

Original: F-

Redo: D

Ted DiBiase vs. Jimmy Snuka

Original: D

Redo: D

Hulk Hogan/Brutus Beefcake vs. Randy Savage/Zeus

Original: B-

Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: C+

About the same this time.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/07/23/history-of-summerslam-count-up-1989-gather-round-the-cauldron/

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Wrestlemania Count-Up – XXXVII Night Two (2022 Redo): Did They Want Us To Be Mad?

Wrestlemania XXXVII Night Two
Date: April 11, 2021
Location: Raymond James Stadium, Tampa, Florida
Attendance: 25,675
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Samoa Joe, Byron Saxton
America the Beautiful: Ashland Craft

It’s the second night of Wrestlemania, because Wrestlemania needs to be a two night show. There are some big things this time too, including Roman Reigns defending the Universal Title against Daniel Bryan and Edge, Sami Zayn vs. Kevin Owens and MORE TAMINA/NATALYA! Let’s get to it.

Ashland Craft sings America the Beautiful. I’m not sure who she is but I was told she’s the new voice of country and WWE wouldn’t lie to me.

Opening video. It’s the same one as yesterday (albeit with some different clips), making it three airings if you watch all three parts on Peacock.

Here are Titus O’Neil and Hulk Hogan, this time dressed as pirates, to welcome us to the show. They agree that it’s hot but they both look good so it’s time to hype up the card. A bunch of pirate jokes don’t go very well so Titus switches to hyping up the Fiend vs. Randy Orton. They both say arrrrrgh a lot to wrap it up.

We recap Randy Orton vs. the Fiend. Orton burned the Fiend alive at TLC (because that’s what you do in an inferno match, so Alexa Bliss popped in as the female Fiend to go after Orton and bring back the Fiend, because this story needs to keep going. Fiend looks like even more of a slasher villain now and it’s time for the big showdown.

Randy Orton vs. The Fiend

The burned Fiend walks through the back and transforms into the regular version. Sure why not. LET ME IN flashes above the Titantron and now it’s Alexa Bliss as the female Fiend to the Firefly Funhouse theme. As she gets to ringside, there is a huge jack-in-the-box, with Bliss cranking the handle so the Fiend can pop out. Fiend dives off the box and clotheslines Orton to start. Orton’s neck gets twisted around but the threat of what looked like a Punt from Fiend sends him bailing outside.

Fiend shrugs off the belly to back onto the announcers’ table and puts on the Mandible Claw as they get back in. The hanging DDT connects but it’s too early for the RKO. Instead a charging Fiend is sent into the “box like structure” (oh that’s a famous one), setting up another hanging DDT.

That doesn’t do much again as Fiend hits a clothesline and hammers away, only to miss the backsplash. The RKO is countered into the Mandible Claw, with Fiend switching to load up Sister Abigail. Then fire shoots up from the posts and Bliss, with black goo on her face, is sitting on the box. Fiend reaches out to her and gets RKOed for the pin at 5:52.

Rating: D. I’m not sure if it’s as bad as the bugs on the mat at Wrestlemania XXXIII but this was another really bad idea, as Fiend’s stuff gets so over the top that it makes no sense and it just more dumb than anything else. If you want to do Wyatt vs. Orton then do Wyatt vs. Orton, but stop making it feel like I’ll get my answers if I read three tie-in comic books that come out two years from now.

Post match Orton leaves and the lights go out. Back up and Fiend/Bliss are gone, which, save for a one off appearance tomorrow on Raw, was it for Wyatt in WWE. After this, thank goodness.

Titus O’Neil and Hulk Hogan are in the back with Eric Bischoff when Bayley interrupts. She shakes Bischoff’s hand and praises his podcast before offering him a spot on Ding Dong Hello. Bischoff says he would like to have Bianca Belair on his podcast, maybe with Sasha Banks. Bayley isn’t impressed and says they’re nothing compared to him. Bischoff and Hogan suddenly remember that they need to look at a boat and Titus goes with them. Titus to Bayley: “Sorry. Hall of Fame stuff.”

Women’s Tag Team Titles: Shayna Baszler/Nia Jax vs. Tamina/Natalya

Tamina/Natalya are challenging after winning a gauntlet match yesterday. Baszler and Natalya go technical to start and that means an early standoff. Natalya tries a Sharpshooter but Baszler goes straight to the ropes, meaning it’s Jax coming in to shove Natalya down. Jax wants and gets Tamina though, giving us some of the cheering that led to Tamina being more of a thing in 2021.

An exchange of headbutts let them glare at each other so Tamina hammers her up against the ropes. Natalya comes back in with a double backdrop but Baszler comes in off a blind tag. Baszler has to small package her way out of a Sharpshooter attempt so Natalya goes with the release German suplex. Natalya catapults her into a superkick from Tamina (that was nice) but Baszler slips out of a slam. The rights and lefts rock Natalya for a change and a hard knee to the face knocks her silly.

Everything breaks down and Jax slams Tamina on the floor. We settle down to Baszler cranking on Natalya’s knee and you can hear the silence spreading. The stomp on the leg (“gnarly” according to Graves) allows Jax to come back in and lift Natalya up, with Baszler adding a running knee for two. Back up and Jax’s running shoulder hits the post but Tamina is STILL down on the floor. Natalya shouts COME ON YOU GUYS to try and wake the fans up a bit but Jax spinebusters her for two with Tamina making the save.

Tamina comes back in to clean a few rooms until Baszler kicks her legs out. The Kirifuda Clutch is blocked so Tamina goes up, where Baszler kicks her in the head to cut off the Superfly Splash. Everything breaks down and Jax dives off the top to crossbody Natalya and Tamina. The TAMINA chants start up and she plays Lex Luger Jax’s Yokozuna on an awful slam for two.

Tamina misses the Superfly Splash though and they’re both down again as this just keeps going. Natalya, looking close to death, gets the tag and basement drops Jax to (very slowly) set up the Sharpshooter. Granted it doesn’t matter as Baszler made a blind tag and Kirifuda Clutches Natalya to retain the titles at 14:15.

Rating: F. The only word I can think of here is failure, as we are now about fifty minutes into the show and the place was eerily quiet for some parts of this match. To take the second show with fans in over a year and have them go silent less than an hour into the night says that you have accomplished none of your goals. This was long, not good (at one point Tamina messed up A TAG by moving her hand and starting to come in before Natalya had tagged her) and then gave us an anticlimactic ending as the champs retain. Natalya and Tamina would get the belts in about a month anyway, making this all the dumber.

We recap Sami Zayn vs. Kevin Owens. Zayn has gone off the deep end, suggesting that there is a conspiracy against them because THEY are all out to get him. Owens can’t get behind it but offers to Stun some sense into him. Zayn has Logan Paul here as his guest as Owens continues to think Zayn is nuts. They did a nice job of having Zayn sound completely off his rocker for this and my goodness it’s cool to see Owens vs. Zayn at Wrestlemania.

Kevin Owens vs. Sami Zayn

JBL is guest commentator and Zayn brings out Logan Paul as his special guest. Zayn charges right at him to start and it’s a Pop Up Powerbomb three seconds in, with Zayn rolling outside. The apron powerbomb is broken up and they head back inside with Owens dropping him ribs first onto the top rope. A running corner clothesline rocks Zayn, who is bumping all over the place for Owens.

The Cannonball connects, allowing JBL to get in the Otto Wanz reference that he makes every time someone uses a Cannonball. They head to the apron and Zayn manages a brainbuster, which is quite the scary spot and comes pretty early in the match. The Michinoku Driver (Cole: “Blue Thunder Bomb!” Graves: “It’s a Michinoku Driver Cole. I’m gonna save you from the internet.”) gives Zayn two and he puts Owens on top. Owens fights out with right hands and the headbutt, setting up the frog splash for two.

A pumphandle driver onto the knee gives Owens two more but Zayn is back up with the exploder suplex into the corner. Another brainbuster gives Zayn another two and he hammers Owens down. They head up top and Owens reverses into the swinging superplex for the double knockdown. Some running clothesline in the corner rock Zayn but he’s right back with the Helluva Kick. Another Helluva Kick is cut off by a superkick, followed by a second one to make Paul cringe. The Stunner gives Owens the clean pin at 9:24.

Rating: B-. It felt like they were just getting in every signature move they could here and that was ok, as this was all about this match making it to the biggest stage in the world. That is something that would have felt like a dream back in the day but here they are. It’s a cool story and they made it work, with the first good match of the night as well.

Post match Paul checks on Zayn, who yells at him due to reasons of insanity. Paul shoves him so Zayn walks away, leaving Paul to raise Owens’ hand. A Stunner abounds.

Riddle is on his scooter in the back and runs into Great Khali. That means a pitch for giant scooters but Khali just stares at him. Rob Van Dam comes in and Riddle is impressed, with Van Dam translating Khali’s words as business advice. Van Dam has his own rolling papers and gives them out before hitting his catchphrase. HOW DO YOU SCREW UP VAN DAM MEETS RIDDLE???

Get vaccinated.

US Title: Sheamus vs. Riddle

Riddle is defending and they’re fighting because Sheamus beat him up with his scooter. They go straight to the brawling with Riddle striking away in the corner. Sheamus powers his way out of a choke and drives Riddle into the corner for some elbows to the face. The swinging release Rock Bottom (which isn’t usually a Sheamus move) gets two but the Irish Curse seems to wake Riddle up.

The armbreaker over the top rope has Sheamus in trouble but he reverses into the forearms to the chest. Back in and Sheamus goes up top, only to get belly to belly superplexed back down for a big crash. Riddle is back up with a Broton into a Jackhammer (Goldberg is not pleased) for two. With that not working, Riddle loads up a slingshot something, which is cut off with a hard knee.

They head to the apron with Riddle grabbing a German suplex. The springboard Floating Bro takes Sheamus down again and Riddle is rolling. Back in and Sheamus has to power out of a triangle choke into a powerbomb for two of his own, with Riddle switching the cover into a rear naked choke. It’s Sheamus going up so Riddle follows him, only to get pulled into White Noise. Middle rope knees give Sheamus two more so Riddle tries a springboard moonsault..which is Brogue Kicked out of the air (nice timing) for the pin and the title at 10:52.

Rating: C+. Time has helped this one a bit as Riddle was about to move on to RKBro, but this was a deflating loss as Riddle hadn’t been champion very long and then lost to Sheamus. The show continues to limit how much good it can do, though at least this one came after a pretty physical match. It isn’t like Sheamus as US Champion is a bad thing, but taking it from Riddle at Wrestlemania? That feels like a Fastlane kind of title match.

We look at Bad Bunny’s debut last night.

We recap Big E. vs. Apollo Crews in a Nigerian Drum Fight for Big E.’s Intercontinental Title. Big E. won the title on Christmas night but Crews turned heel and beat him up, because Big E. as a beaten down champion is the way to go. Then Crews embraced his Nigerian heritage and became little more than a caricature, only to have Big E. beat him at Fastlane. Therefore, we needed a rematch with a bunch of drums because culture.

Intercontinental Title: Big E. vs. Apollo Crews

Hometown boy Big E. is defending in a Nigerian Drum Fight, meaning anything goes and there are a bunch of drums around ringside. As a bonus, Wale raps Big E. to the ring to really make it feel special. Big E. starts fast with a kendo stick but gets a gong knocked out of his hands. Crews is back with some stick shots of his own so Big E. spears him through the ropes to take over.

The steps are set up at ringside, only to have Crews hit a Death Valley Driver onto the apron. That lets Crews lay Big E. onto the steps to try and slam the steps onto him but the steps only hits steps. Big E. is back up with a Rock Bottom off the apron onto the steps but instead of covering, let’s set up a table in the ring. The delay lets Crews hit a kick to the head and beat on him with a kendo stick, only to miss a frog splash through the table. Big E. hits the Big Ending, so here is a monster in a military uniform to come in and beat Big E. down. Crews is laid on top to win the title at 6:50.

Rating: D+. The drums were barely used as this was every other weapons brawl with kendo sticks, a table and the steps. Then the monster comes in to save Crews and win him the title, because Big E., in his hometown and with someone rapping him to the ring, had to lose the title to Apollo Crews here. They couldn’t do this at Smackdown or at Backlash or anything like that, but this show right here under these circumstances. After Riddle lost the US Title in the previous match. Say it with me: because WWE.

We look back at last night’s show, because Wrestlemania needs filler (possible because two of the five matches so far haven’t broken seven minutes). This eats up the better part of five minutes.

Hey! The media LOVED night one!

Get vaccinated!

Hall of Fame video, as this seems to be an intermission without being an intermission. This is the 2021 Class though, as 2020/2021 were inducted in the same year.

Here is the class in the stadium:

Rob Van Dam (nice reaction)
Molly Holly (long overdue)
Great Khali (sure why not)
Ozzy Osbourne (not here)
Eric Bischoff (that’s bizarre)
Rich Hering (longtime WWE employee, Warrior Award)
Kane (the big finale and again, well deserved)

Batista was scheduled to be in but didn’t appear here, as he will be inducted at some point in the future.

We recap Asuka vs. Rhea Ripley for Asuka’s Raw Women’s Title. Bianca Belair went after the Smackdown Women’s Title so Asuka needed a challenger. Game on.

Raw Women’s Title: Asuka vs. Rhea Ripley

Ripley is challenging and gets played to the ring, because this show needs something else to drag it out. After the Big Match Intros, Asuka hits a dropkick to the back and a rollup gets a fast two. Another dropkick into the corner angers Ripley even more, only to have her charge get sent face first into the buckle. They head outside with Asuka’s pop up knee going somewhere in the vicinity of Ripley’s face.

Back in and Asuka hits a hard kick to the back, which is enough to make Ripley take her down and hammer away. The bodyscissors goes on with Ripley hitting her in the back and even messing with the rainbow hair. A series of clotheslines keeps Asuka in trouble but she pulls Ripley down into a kneebar. With that broken up, Ripley sends her into the corner but stops to jaw with some fans. Asuka shoves her off the top though and there’s the missile dropkick to put them both down.

Another trip up top is broken up for Asuka and Ripley drops her face first onto the apron. Asuka is fine enough to catch her with a DDT off the apron and out to the floor, which is good for two because modern wrestling is stupid. Some Kawada kicks wake Ripley up and she grabs the Prism Trap. That’s reversed into an armbar, which is countered with a hard swing into the corner to rock Asuka again. Another armbar goes on but Ripley fights out again. A running kick to the head is quickly countered though and Riptide connects for the pin and the title at 13:37.

Rating: C+. They were having a good, hard hitting match but then that DDT off the apron took me out of it. That was one of the most ridiculous non-finishes I’ve seen in a long time, as there was no reason to have someone be back in the ring within the next month, let alone win the match. Ripley getting the title was a good call in the end, but come up with less infused with dumb way to get there.

Get vaccinated!

We look back at Randy Orton vs. the Fiend, because that needs to be revisited.

Titus O’Neil and Hulk Hogan thank the fans for watching. Bayley comes out to complain about not getting respect and her lack of pyro. Cue the Bella Twins to get in her face, but Bayley reminds them that John Cena isn’t here tonight. The Bellas beat her up and get booed out of the stadium.

Here’s what’s coming on Peacock.

The next pay per view is Wrestlemania Backlash, because two nights just isn’t enough.

We recap Edge and Daniel Bryan challenging Roman Reigns for the Smackdown World Title. Edge had to retire because of his neck injuries but came back and won the Royal Rumble to earn his title shot. Then Bryan said he wanted to be in the match and made Reigns tap at Fastlane, but the referee didn’t see it. Edge interfered and cost Bryan the match, so let’s make it a triple threat.

Smackdown World Title: Edge vs. Daniel Bryan vs. Roman Reigns

Reigns, with Paul Heyman and Jey Uso, is defending and Edge gets a heck of a reaction with probably the loudest pop of the weekend. Bryan gets knocked into the corner to start so Reigns starts unloading on Edge. That’s broken up by Bryan who fires off the European uppercuts, only to be sent outside. Jey adds a superkick and sends Bryan into the steps, leaving us with Edge vs. Reigns for the time being.

It’s time to go outside with the announcers’ table being loaded up but Bryan breaks that up with a suicide dive. Edge takes out Jey and then sends Reigns into the apron and barricade over and over. A posting drops Reigns so Edge heads back to Uso. The Edgecution onto the steps knocks Uso silly so here are the medics to take Uso out. That leaves Edge to roll Bryan up for a pair of near falls back inside but Reigns is back up to fight over a suplex on the apron.

Bryan pulls Reigns to the floor and there’s the missile dropkick to Edge back inside. Reigns is back in to take both of them down, which is enough for him to want some acknowledgment. Edge gets in an Edge-O-Matic on Reigns but he’s right back up with the Superman Punch. The spear is countered into a sunset flip for two as Heyman is getting worried. They both try spears and collide in the middle for a double knockdown. Bryan is back in with a Swan Dive to Reigns for two, followed by the YES Kicks to both.

The big one gets two on Reigns so Bryan grabs the YES Lock, drawing Edge over for the save. That earns Edge a YES Lock of his own but this time it’s Reigns making a save of his own and unloading on Bryan with right hands. They go back outside with Reigns (slowly) powerbombing Bryan through the announcers’ table but taking too long to pose, allowing Edge to spear him off the steps.

Edge sends him back inside and grabs some chairs but switches to the Crossface instead. The piece of the chair makes the Crossface worse but here is Bryan to come in and block the tap. Bryan adds a YES Lock while the Crossface is still on so Edge and Bryan exchange headbutts to break the double hold. That goes to Bryan as well, so he stomps on Edge’s neck, while shouting about how bad it is.

The running knee is loaded up but Edge spears Bryan down and then does the same to Reigns, with Bryan having to pull the referee out at two. With the normal stuff not working, Edge grabs some chairs and unloads on both of them. The Conchairto crushes Bryan but Uso is back in for the save. Reigns is back up and it’s a Conchairto to Edge, setting up the double pin to retain the titles at 22:42.

Rating: A-. This was so far and away the match of both nights that it isn’t even a fair comparison. It felt like a major showdown with Edge and Bryan getting close to being able to make Reigns work hard. The ending might have been a bit cliched with Uso interfering to keep the title, but dang it was fun with some clever spots and a lot of effort throughout. Awesome main event and the big saving grace of a pretty awful night.

The Bloodline poses to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This is a show where the wrestling wasn’t the point. The main event was great, but there was so much downtime and so much stuff that felt like it was there to anger the fans rather than make them happy. You have two popular champions lose their titles, whatever that box thing was, and a nearly fifteen minute Natalya/Tamina match. I’m not sure how this was supposed to be a happy show, but it was almost painful to watch at times.

Overall Overall Rating: C+. The first night was a lot better than the first, but this whole thing felt like it would have been better off as a long one off show. It came off like WWE was trying to fill in time far more often than they needed to here and it made the show feel long. Other than the main event and maybe one or two other matches, you could cut off the second night almost entirely. Overall it’s good, if nothing else because they had fans back, but this really needed to be trimmed down.

Ratings Comparison

Randy Orton vs. The Fiend

Original: D
Redo: D

Shayna Baszler/Nia Jax vs. Tamina/Natalya

Original: D
Redo: F

Sami Zayn vs. Kevin Owens

Original: B-
Redo: B-

Riddle vs. Sheamus

Original: B-
Redo: C+

Apollo Crews vs. Big E.

Original: C+
Redo: D+

Asuka vs. Rhea Ripley

Original: B-
Redo: C+

Edge vs. Daniel Bryan vs. Roman Reigns

Original: A-
Redo: A-

Overall Rating

Original: B-
Redo: C-

Overall Overall Rating

Original:
Redo: C+

That Women’s Tag Team Title match was a big downgrade and what was I thinking on Crews vs. Big E?

 

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